#i have concepts for his family but those are his bullet points for his default state.....

[vigilaent]

i really need to whip up a dossier for jessie but his bare essentials are : high - school kid discovers he can turn invisible, but not predictably so, and it's just him that turns invisible. so clothes, glasses, earrings, teeth fillings, all still very much visible even once he's gone, so it's not a very practical superpower by any means. . . but by george, he's gonna give it a go, dammit, he's got a goddamn superpower. cue friendly neighborhood branding except it only works if he's naked ? which he very much does not want to do, so he dons a doubly impractical sheet over his head with eye holes as his first superhero costume. he's. . . he's diy - ing it, fellas. self - made super in the making absolutely making a fool of himself all over [ insert superhero city here ].

he is very much a work in progress despite having been bouncing around in my head for about a decade now, but until otherwise updated, he's a foster kid in an okay - but - too - new home when his meta abilities first bloom, and he just kind of drops off the grid. on accident, because when his powers first manifest, he's stuck invisible for two months and still has no idea how he turns back once he eventually does, but also on purpose, because he's always felt out of place in a way he could never shake, so why not make it official ?

[poisedpen]

✒ Planning...for the Neurodivergent!

I think that for most people the term "planning" conjures pictures of perfectly executed layouts and neat, tidy handwriting. While these things are certainly impressive, sometimes it feels like it prioritizes style over function. Journaling, and by extension, planning, does NOT have to be expensive, time consuming, or perfect.

When I first started dipping my toes into the community a few years ago, I got probably two weeks into a proper “bullet journal” before I gave up. My ink smudged, my stickers peeled, and I found that spending hours making the perfect layout was sucking away my limited time.

As a newly diagnosed and treated ADHD-er, I have found some success in a printed planner. All the months, weeks, and days are already laid out for me, and I have the time at work to fill out everything I need.

But what about someone who doesn’t have the luxury of down time at work? What about someone who gets overwhelmed just THINKING about all of the long-term projects and obligations they have on a day-to-day basis? A chronic procrastinator? Someone whose phone’s to-do list is just BURSTING with tasks, but there’s no prioritization?

Introducing…the pocket notebook!

The main objective of this is to find a pocket notebook that is portable, slim, and enjoyable to write on. Field Notes are quite popular among the stationery crowd, but they’re also on the pricey side for only 48 pages. If you have the money and you enjoy them, go for it! But there could very well be something just as perfect for you waiting at the dollar store.

Yeah, it’s small, and therefore may not be the most comfortable thing to write in. However, it’s not truly meant to be a full-blown journal. No– instead of shoving it into an endless to-do list or note on your phone…you are making your idea tangible.

Your phone, and by extension all of its notifications and applications and features, is designed to distract you. By removing all of that and placing a simple, analog tool in front of you…it is, in theory, easier to focus on what matters.

Think of a cool story idea at work? Jot it down. Remember something you need to do on the way home? Birthdays? Events? Goals? Jot it down. There are no rules. If it's important to you, keep it.

The pocket notebook isn’t really intended to be a super-organized or coherent space for your thoughts. It’s a catch-all for things that might slip your mind later. Then, when you get a chance to rest at the end of your day, you can look back and transfer that idea to something a little more organized. This can be a more structured planner, a journal, a story document, a discord chat, etc.

But hey…maybe that’s still not your cup of tea. You don’t have the time to sit down and reflect on your day. You don’t want to have to organize everything into neat little boxes. It’s just a concept at this point, but…I might have something for you.

✒ MY PSEUDO-PLANNER METHOD

This is in part adapted from other methods I’ve seen people use, but specifically made with my partner’s struggles in mind. He has been using his phone’s default to-do list to write down tasks, but by doing so other things get pushed to the bottom. There’s no real way to “prioritize” them, and after years of using this system there were simply so many that he didn’t know where to start.

So, after a little bit of nudging, I had my partner write down every single thing in his phone’s notes and to-do list in the front of his pocket notebook. Since he struggles with prioritization, I went ahead and did the following steps for him. (If you struggle with this and have a friend, partner, or family member willing to do the same thing, definitely use them as a resource!)

✒ STEP-BY-STEP PROCESS

I chose three things my partner NEEDED to get done before a certain deadline (In this case, seeing his parents for Thanksgiving).

I transferred them to a clean page and wrote the due date at the top.

I crossed those tasks off of the task masterlist.

I “sealed” his task masterlist with a piece of washi tape (masking/painters tape also works great!)

I left space at the bottom of the page for additional notes he may think of throughout the week.

For many neurodivergent people, seeing a HUGE LIST OF THINGS YOU NEED TO DO is the single most discouraging thing ever. By removing the list of things from normal view, I’m relying on the theory of “out of sight, out of mind”. Of course, that doesn’t mean you can’t still get those things done! It’s more about tricking your brain into only thinking about the most important things you have to do in that time period. And then...getting the satisfaction of crossing them out once they're complete.

I have actually been using a method quite similar to this for my full planner. I tape folded half-pages full of long term goals, purchases, and other lists to my monthly page so that I can go back and reference them when I feel up for a new task. By keeping them hidden from my regular view it helps me feel less anxious about ALL THE THINGS I WANT TO ACHIEVE and I can instead focus on the short-term necessities.

(Please excuse my mess...I'm moving into a Hobonichi Cousin for 2024, and figuring out my process in this cheap planner in the meantime!)

✒ OTHER TIPS

Pick a notebook you like! Paper smoothness, paper thickness, size, lined, dotted, gridded, etc.

Use a writing utensil you enjoy! Rollerball, fountain pen, sharpies, pencil, whatever!

Think of it as a sensory experience when it comes to the above. If you enjoy the act of it, you’re more likely to do it!

If you are able to carry around two differently-colored pens, use one to underline/add contrast for readability.

Use a paperclip to keep your place.

If you have it available, use sticky notes for tentative plans that aren’t set in stone yet.

You ARE allowed to tear pages out, cut them, modify the cover, etc. NO RULES! It's your spce.

You can prevent bleedthrough to other pages by keeping a thin, paper-sized object behind your page. (Like shitajiki/pencil boards)

✒ CONCLUSION

The main point behind EVERYTHING I’ve written here is that digital tools aren’t for everyone. Notion, Obsidian, Trello, etc. are great resources, and there are many people who have great success when using them. However, I am sure there are many other people like my partner and I who have developed a kind of “clutter blindness” to things that aren’t immediately in front of them.

You aren’t stupid for needing things broken down into exact, detailed steps. You aren’t inherently irresponsible because you miss deadlines or misplace important information. You need accessibility. The world may not be built for people like us, but there are so many ways you can learn to help yourself achieve your goals

(Please feel free to add your ideas and modifications to this post! I'd love to see what your methods are-- perhaps they might help me, as well!)

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

hi yes im still alive

DON’T MIND ME, I’M JUST--

HAVING A MOMENT TO PROCESS ALL THE LORE AND STORY CHAPTER 6 JUST DROPPED ON US, I CAN BARELY WRITE

AHHHHHHH, I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS 😭 kjdbbaufbiafafvoaybo LEMME PUT ON MY THINKING CAP AND THROW SOME STUFF OUT ASDYUBUASDLI;AGVUOQIB;VI You’ll understand why I used Leona’s face here even though it’s Idia and Ortho’s chapter after you read my thoughts--

***Chapter 6 (and other main story) spoilers below the cut!***

Okay, just to keep it simple, I’ll try to keep things in chronological order!

First is a bullet point list of my thoughts on chapter 6 so far, then all my questions and theories (mostly a biggish theory on Ace) are at the end of the post.

Expectation: Idia cowering in his room, Vil and Rook busting down his door using Epel as a battering ram, dead Ortho theory confirmed

Reality: SWAT TEAM RAID ON NRC, DORM LEADERS (sans Kalim) AND JAMIL GET KIDNAPPED

Admittedly, I’m disappointed to see that the injury Grim inflicted to MC was basically just a cat scratch and nothing more. I thought it would be a lot more impactful if MC had to deal with juggling the realization that Grim has betrayed their friendship and trust while also on the verge of death (or at least while being severely injured)... And given how MC reacted to the attack at the end of chapter 5, I would think whatever struck them was much more substantial than just a cat scratch. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say either the script got scrubbed by Disney, or the intent was that MC was still woozy from VDC / OB Vil, MC felt so betrayed that it shook them emotionally, or that MC was just that weak by default that they can’t defend themselves against cat claws.

Hey, Ramshackle’s finally getting renovated! Proceeds to immediately get destroyed again--

I feel like????????? They tried to retroactively explain why Neige won to try and mitigate the uproar over how VDC ended. There’s some dialogue between the VDC group about how they didn’t perform at their peak because of having just walked out of dealing with OB Vil, and how Neige’s fans were going to vote for him anyway because they resonated with his background. Honestly, I think they should have moved on from that sore spot instead of bringing it up again, even if how chapter 5 ended didn’t personally bother me.

BOOM, HERE COME THE TWST TERMINATORS--

NOT GONNA LIE, THOSE STYX GUYS LOOK HOT SO COOL

AAAAAAND IT’S KIDNAPPING MONTAGE TIME, KIDS

JOABSFHUPAUABDBADB CALM DOWN, RIDDLE??????? YOU’RE GOING TO COMMIT ARSON IN BROAD DAYLIGHT--

Okay, I know this chapter’s focused on Ignihyde and Grim, but the standout part to me (so far) has been the scene where Leona’s being kidnapped. Historically, Leona has not been a character that I like (excluding that one time I had to pretend to like him for a game). I feel like he’s one massive missed opportunity (he didn’t show up much in chapter 2, he’s pretty similar backstory-wise to his Disney counterpart compared to the other Dorm Leaders, he didn’t seem to learn anything or become a better person even a LITTLE after chapter 2, etc.). I’m not a fan of his lazy and arrogant attitude either (even if it is justified by his backstory). But here? THIS IS THE LEONA I ACTUALLY LIKE AND WANT TO SEE MORE OF. 

LIKE????? I CAN’T DESCRIBE TO YOU HOW MUCH I LIKE THIS SCENE???? Yeah, we have Leona fighting STYX at first, but as soon as he realizes who they are, he wises up and surrenders because he knows better than to resist arrest. AND NOT ONLY THAT, but he uses King’s Roar in a smart way--to turn the falling greenhouse glass panes into sand so they don’t hurt anyone nearby (namely him and Ruggie).

And after he turns himself in????? LEONA TELLS RUGGIE TO TAKE CARE OF SAVANACLAW FOR HIM!!! THIS is what a real leader would do. He looks after himself and his people, but he knows when to surrender, AND he leaves his “kingdom” (the dorm) in good hands while he’s away. THIS is the Leona I want to see.

AJBDUASHPFBUABFIABIYFBIPFAAFIAF I ALSO REALLY LIKE HIS SASS WHEN HE JUST THROWS HIS HANDS UP AND ASDBIASBIABAIODDAYOFAIPPADAIDB SAYS “I’ll go with you, but be careful while escorting me, okay? Despite my looks, I'm a precious prince. I’ll get sick/dizzy if you drive recklessly.” SARCASTIC SASSY SMARTASS??????? IF YOU HAD MORE LINES LIKE THIS, I’D LIKE YOU MORE

I love how Azul’s still talking about capitalism/how he can profit from Idia (apparently the Shrouds are like the TWST equivalent of Google??????) as he’s being escorted away by the agents?????? IF I WERE HIM, I’D BE PISSED OFF THAT THEY INTERRUPTED MY BOARD GAME????? At least let the man finish first--

Damn, everyone’s being tasered???????? And apparently all the STYX agents are equipped with anti-magic plates? I guess Bind the Heart can just eat shit then--

Lilia’s ringtone is cute, period.

CROWLEY CALLED STYX TO CAPTURE GRIM???? GRIM IS OFFICIALLY A SCP THAT NEEDS TO BE CONTAINED????

WAIT WHAT CROWLEY’S BEING KIDNAPPED TOO??????? Oh well, the school is probably safer in Trein’s hands anyway--

askhlbfbilhidbabbidasb RIDDLE WAKES UP POST KIDNAPPING AND HE’S USING LEONA AS A LAP PILLOW?????!

How does it feel to be held in a room against your will, Jamil? Yeah, don’t like a taste of your own medicine, do you?

OH HI IDIA, NICE YZMA MAD SCIENTIST GETUP YOU GOT THERE

Wait, what????? THAT’S IT?????? SERIOUSLY???????

MAN.

I have so many questions??????? Specifically about STYX and what they do, and how the Shrouds are tied into all of it.

So they say STYX is a specialized unit called in to quell serious Overblot cases. And if Crowley called them to deal with Grim... well, bad times ahead for Grim. STYX has also been studying Overblot for a long time, which is why (I think?) they captured Riddle, Leona, Azul, Jamil, and Vil. 

There’s been some allusions made between Grim and Stitch in a lot of fan art and fan theories I’ve seen, since their struggles have some parallels: that being them struggling to decide if they are “good” or “bad”. I don’t know if this was intentional on the part of the TWST writing team, but regardless, it’s a really good concept that plays into the themes of TWST itself. There’s no good, there’s no evil, no black and white--most of the characters we see may be BASED on villains, but that doesn’t MAKE them villains. They are good, and bad, in their own ways--and now Grim is dealing with that crisis as he fights to keep his sanity and avoid completely succumbing to Overblot.

Though Idia seems to be involved with STYX’s research, it doesn’t sound like he personally gave the order to retrieve those test subjects (or at the very least, he’s not happy about roughing up the test subjects), it sounds like the orders came from other people in the organization. His parents, perhaps?

They mention briefly that Idia’s parents are asking him to “come home”, so it must be for something urgent. Are they worried about his safety? But Idia’s lines at the end of chapter 5 lead me to think he is estranged from his family, since he straight up rejected a job offer linked to them (Olympus Corp is owned by the Jupiter family, and the Shrouds are a branch family of Jupier), and says something like “I’m not welcome anywhere”. Has Idia done something to disgrace him from the rest of the family? Or is it more of a self imposed/self inflicted statement, given that he always says he’s “cursed” and acts like he’s guilty of something that deserves scorn?

Why is Idia participating in STYX research, even if it means experimenting on his fellow students (and fellow board game enthusiast Azul)? People are speculating that he wants to use blots to fully revive Ortho (if dead Ortho theory is true), or that Idia actually has heroic intentions (he wants to know more about blots to prevent OBing from happening?), but at this point??? Literally anything could happen?!

In future parts, I’m guessing Pomefiore, MC, and Adeuce will team up to break Jamil and the Dorm Leaders (except Malleus, Malleus got left out again www) out? And HOPEFULLY we get to see Rook’s Unique Magic or at least more screen time, since I feel like he got so little in chapter 5... Another thing I’d like to see is Ace and/or Epel getting their Unique Magic, or at least starting to develop it. It’s really mostly Ace I want more details for.

A theory I’ve been holding onto for a long time is that Deuce getting his UM will spur Ace on to become jealous (since he has always seen Deuce as an idiot/”lesser” than him), and that will cause a rift in the friendship, or for Ace to throw himself into a dangerous situation to prove himself (he has done it before with Riddle)... and has his ass rescued again. This would make Ace even angrier, since he feels like everyone is treating him like a little kid or rubbing it in that he isn’t “as good” as they are. I don’t know where it would go from there (I’m sure TWST would get creative), but ultimately it would culminate in Ace making amends with everyone and rushing in to save them from either Grim or Idia OB.

I don’t think Ace would discover his UM in a similar manner as Deuce (Deuce had to embrace his own stubbornness and straightforwardness, but as the term “Unique” Magic implies, the way a magic develops and manifests is “unique” to the user). While Deuce has to learn to accept his own way of thinking, I believe Ace is already sure of his own way of thinking and has totally accepted it. I think what Ace has to deal with instead is coming to terms with his fickleness. We’ve seen him time and time again treating his loved ones kind of callously, from constantly bullying MC, Grim, and Deuce to ghosting his own girlfriend and flaking on people when they are counting on him to do a task.

The issue with Ace isn’t that he isn’t aware, it’s that he is aware and he seems to think this behavior is totally okay. He demonstrates little to no remorse in what he does and says, and he doesn’t seem to care about the consequences either (how many times does he get punished by Riddle, yet he keeps doing the same dumb things over and over?). Ace appears to operate under the mindset of always being in the right, or (if he’s in the wrong), he won’t really acknowledge it, or he will wave it off as “no big deal”--and I think that’s his greatest weakness.

In the scenario I described earlier, I mentioned that Ace’s jealousy will cause a wedge between him and his friends, and I think this will play into him realizing the error of his ways. When he has finally driven away all of the people that supported him, what will he have left? Nothing. Then maybe Ace suddenly finds himself relating to Idia, or to Grim, who have Overblotted and are in a similar emotional state as he is. Confused and lonely... and that energizes him to pitch in again, even if all he has is wind magic up his sleeve. Everyone could be shocked that Ace has returned, and in that moment, he could finally realize his true potential and unlock his Unique Magic!

(Maybe that’s too specific, but that’s a scenario that I’ve had playing in my head for a long time!)

... Buuuuut given that Ace has gotten little to no spotlight so far in chapter 6, I’m not sure if they’ll lean into him developing his UM yet (unless they pull a chapter 5 and really start addressing Ace in the latter half of the chapter like they did with Deuce). Seeing as chapter 6 is dealing with a lot of heavy topics (death, Grim lore, Overblot lore), I’m thinking maybe the TWST team will push off Ace’s UM development to chapter 7???? The only way I can see it happening in chapter 6 is if the chapter is SUPER long, or if the writing is REALLY good or really bad. 

Anyway, I’m keeping my fingers crossed!!! I’m so excited for the rest of chapter 6... I hope that we don’t have to wait too long for it!

[potatotrash0]

Your DR magic AU, hand it over 🤲

Okay I have two other anons and I’m just gonna split the character ideas among the three asks. I don’t quite have a plot thought out, and most of these characters’ concepts have only existed in my head up until now...bare with me skdjksjfkd

Mm I talked about them briefly in Prom’s ask? But here’s a more in-depth thing of the THH fighting styles.

Makoto is a mage-type. (I used fighter, support, and mage to describe the various adventurer types it’s temporary just roll with it) Again, he can’t really hold magic for very long? He’s got a large mana reserve but it’s hard to activate and harder to control, so he’s currently working on mastering the little bullets. In the future, I imagine large barrages of bullets would sort of circle around him like they would in the barrel of a gun.

He probably got in accidentally? I’m not entirely sure about this, but I think there’s an entrance exam for Reserve Courses and he was probably forced in on Komaru’s behalf for some reason.

He was basically running the entire time until the very end when he panicked and suddenly the entire field was wiped clean from him waving his arm. HPA saw that, decided that he was worth training, and put him into the Main Course. He doesn’t feel very good about getting in that way, but HPA isn’t exactly empathetic like he is. Again this is like one of three ways I think he could’ve gotten in with the rest of the cast because I’m indecisive skdjsjf

Kyoko is another mage-type, in general the Main Gangs of each game have various themes. THH’s trio has a magic theme, they all use magic. She doesn’t use a weapon, though I’m thinking her gloves act as a limiter of sorts?

As a general rule, more mana means less control, and being half-demon gives her a lot of it. Her gloves help her regulate her mana output so that she doesn’t use too much of it when attacking and tire herself out. Later in the timeline, I imagine there might be a scene where she takes them off and fights off some enemies to buy the rest of the class time to escape something? She would get trapped in the process, but I think this would happen after she’s worked with Makoto for a while and she would trust him enough to believe he would come back for her if she didn’t return.

Oh this isn’t related to her fighting style but on the topic of her being half-demon, that’s mainly because I thought it was boring for everyone to be human and I’m a big sucker for fantasy species so yeah. She’s a cambion.

She has purple-tinted skin, horns that curl up and are fairly close to her head, a thin pointed tail, pointed ears, her pupils are slitted, she’s got carnivore-style teeth, her nails are longer and sharper by default. Whenever she uses the full extent of her magic, her scleras turn dark purple and her irises turn white. Oh yeah her scars came from an accident she had when she was young where her magic got out of control and burned her hands. Her mom’s the demon by the way, for no particular reason, I just thought that the Kirigiris would stay human in this and I don’t know anything about her mom’s side of the family.

I just realized I never said Makoto’s race skdjks he’s human!! He and Komaru just happen to be a special case and have a lot of mana. Most other humans in this AU aren’t so lucky. (cough hinata cough cough)

Byakuya, again, uses magic. He’s the only one who uses a weapon in the Trio, he uses a staff specially made by the Togami family. He also knows how to use a sword and a bow.

I haven’t put too much thought into him, but I know for a fact that his adventuring outfit would have a big sweeping cape later in the timeline. In the beginning though, he just has a stupid expensive suit. The cape comes in later as he, Kyoko, and Makoto start to group up more and more.

I’ve decided that adventurers in this AU group up just as often as they go solo, and while Byakuya would initially be solo, he would deem Makoto and Kyoko strong enough to work with whenever they’re taking on a difficult job.

Groups would change to have matching designs the longer they’re partnered up, and capes/cloaks happen to be the THH Trio’s Thing, as in all three of them would have a cape/cloak of some sort. Byakuya because he’s pretentious, Makoto because he thinks it looks cool, and Kyoko because she uses the cloak for practical reasons like storing things and keeping a low profile when needed. Oh and Byakuya’s bloodline is of royal elven descent, their business is selling spellbooks, runestones, potions, reagents, any magical item you could think of.

Sayaka is a half-siren mage! She mostly uses charm and illusionary magic, as well as healing so that she can support her allies. Later on, she might learn water magic so she can actually deal damage as well. I haven’t decided on her weapon of choice, perhaps she uses a lyre or casts spells from a book. I’m also debating having her learn hand-to-hand combat instead of water magic?

I just like the idea of someone coming up and trying to challenge her, thinking they’ll beat her easily, and barely getting a hit in before she kicks their legs out from under them and tosses them over her shoulder like they weigh nothing. She deserves to take out people twice her size and be menacing, as a treat for the amount of disrespect she gets in the fandom. And I want her to take Leon down a peg because he definitely acts a little like a cocky frat boy sometimes.

Speaking of Leon, we’ve got our first fighter-type!!! I could have him use a baseball bat but that’s boring so I’m thinking he might utilize items as well as a weapon? Bombs or grenades that look like a baseball and explode on impact, baseballs that ignite when thrown and act as fire balls. Alas, I don’t think about him much so this is all just me throwing ideas to see what sticks.

Whatever the case, the main thing I know would happen is that he frequently gets help from Kazuichi and Miu because he just cannot for the life of him stop breaking his equipment. He’s reckless and rushes into battle and now that he doesn’t have Kanon to stop him from setting stuff on fire all the time, he gets detention a lot. (And no she isn’t into him like in canon, I refuse to acknowledge that she ever was.)

Chihiro......they can’t fight djfjsjfjjf. They specialize in making tech and weapons, and in the beginning, would mainly use robots that they programmed to support their allies. Though, they do end up training with Mondo, Sakura, and Aoi to help them become better at combat, and eventually they join everyone else on the front lines as a ranged fighter/support type.

Also, the robots would kinda follow them around like pets. Cute little guys that can also shoot lasers. The robots are powered by mana crystals and each one has a different personality and magic type! Sometimes they follow around different people, the electric one took a liking to Mondo and you’ll see it floating around while he works out. They’re buds.

On the topic of Mondo, he’s another fighter-type! He’s more hand-to-hand combat. A controlled berserker, if you will. Probably started out fighting guys in his hometown and progressed to clearing out monsters when Daiya got concerned about his temper? Perhaps. Maybe. I do not think about Daiya I apologize.

Oh wait hold on. I’m looking at his character art and he’s got a hammer.........it’s decided he uses a warhammer, the biggest one they’ve got, and it’s probably a mana-based weapon. Specifically electric. He and that lil robot wipe the battlefield with their opponents >:D

Taka is probably a fighter-type? I can’t for the life of me find where I read this, but apparently he’s really good at self-defense so I imagine he does hand-to-hand combat as well as sword-fighting for the Noble Paladin Aesthetic.

Hifumi was originally a mage-type, but upon second thought, I’m making him a support-type who uses items and potions and stuff! I like the idea of him making fun little bottles and potions themed after his favorite animes and mangas..........he also definitely helped everyone design their adventurer outfits. He’s the only reason that Makoto’s outfit isn’t boring as hell.

Celeste is, of course, a mage-type. She’s Miss Lolita of course I have to make her an ethereal magic user alright also I love her and I love mages let me have this skfjdkjf. As for her weapon, my first thought was her having playing cards that she throws HxH style?

Or she could summon goons to fight for her, playing into the whole loyal servant dream she has. They would be vaguely themed after the cards, so there would be a jack, king, queen, and joker, all of different magic types depending on the suit of the card she throws. Electric for a spade, fire for a heart, ice for a diamond, something along those lines.

I’m also considering having her little...finger armor thing? I’m thinking of having that cross into her magic, where she attacks with claw-like things formed out of mana. Of course she could also just. Use the cards to cast spells directly skdjksjfkhf

Sakura is definitely a fighter-type. Again, hand-to-hand style, but I imagine she’s more controlled and strategic than Mondo. I can’t see her using a weapon, so I guess she’s like one of the only characters to fight exclusively with fists.

Mukuro’s a ranged fighter-type, but she can also do melee. She uses magic-based guns, ones that shoot mana infused bullets. They have a variety of effects depending on the type of bullet and magic. (I’m not a gun person so take this with a grain of salt.)

Bullets that break apart might be laced with electric magic so that they can shock a target from several points, or fire magic if she’s aiming to start a fire quickly. Exploding bullets are usually used with fire magic, but she might switch to ice if she wants to create a barrage of ice shards for...some reason, I don’t know. There’s more combinations I could probably make, but I’m. Not here to spend an hour researching guns. Not right now at least, who knows what I’ll want info on in the future.

Mmmmmm I’m starting to lose patience here so forgive me for the shorter explanations. I might throw in a fun fact about them for ✨ flavor ✨

Junko’s a fighter/mage-type! She uses a scythe and laces the blade with magic. She could combine it with fire magic to create a flaming scythe and go nuts with it, or she could just channel general mana and slam the blade into the ground to create a big crack in the ground.

There’s about an 80% chance she gets several weapons later in the timeline. Her scythe, a spear, possibly a gun. Monokuma probably exists, I like to think Junko ran into a smarter monster and tamed it and kept it as a slightly feral pet.

Also, yes, she’s still a big adrenaline junkie who gets off on despair. If you see her fighting things she knows are out of her league, mind your business.....actually, call someone to help before she gets herself killed. Please.

I haven’t decided what Aoi will be just yet? I’m veering towards fighter/mage-type, she could use water magic and maybe a leg-based fighting style. Possibly judo or taekwondo. I.....do not have any ideas for her. However I do know that she and Sakura would have a bunch of combo moves together dkfjkejfkdjjd

Toko is a mage-type! She probably uses a book to cast spells from. Or just uses her hands. She would fight ranged, I don’t think she’d want to be up in the action. Too much stress for her, y’know? I

As for Syo, she fight differently than Toko! She technically uses dual swords, but the swords can also connect to create a giant pair of scissors. Again, this is just sort of a fun character thing, but she gets to hate Byakuya in this AU. They have arguments and get on each other’s nerves a lot, but I think the rest of the class usually separates them before anything serious happens.

At some point after Toko befriends Komaru, I like to think that Syo gets a proper fight scene with Byakuya where she rips into him. I don’t think Toko would want to hurt anyone though, even him, so Syo would probably leave him with a few minor cuts at most.

Afterwards, I think Byakuya would quiet down with the insults with Naegi and Kyoko’s requests. (Well. Naegi asked him to try and be nicer because he was worried that they might fight again. Kyoko just bluntly told him that he needed to stop being a jerk and start considering everyone else’s feelings.)

Skfksjfkdh ah. I also like to think Komaru and Toko were initially partnered up by HPA for a job. They were assigned to deal with a couple of school kids wreaking havoc on a nearby city with some monsters they semi-tamed?

But after finishing the job, they decided to partner up permanently on their own. They probably have a few combo moves that Komaru came up with, Toko tweaked them to make them actually possible with their skill set and weapons.

Hiro is...possibly a mage/support-type? He’s probably a bit cowardly and freaks out when on the front lines, but he can use a crystal ball to attack from afar. I’m also considering giving him tarot cards so that he can toss them and attack from several points at once?

Or the ball could shatter at some point during the story and he could just roll with it and spread the shards out during battle to attack from several points at once. They could also be used to create a magic cage of sorts, like electric fence but only electricity.

Okay that’s everybody oh my god. I have plenty more stuff about this au, this isn’t even half of it trust me lmao. I’m sorry about this being so long I didn’t realize it’d be this wordy!!!!!

[silversavant2021]

The Least Protected Group...Single Fathers!

There are several laws that protect various groups in our society, and in various areas...employment, wages, education, etc. According to the U.S Federal Law website, “these laws prohibit discrimination based on race, color, sex, religion, national origin, age, disability, and genetic information, as well as reprisal for protected activity”. However, although they protect according to gender, there is another group within gender which needs protecting in another specific area. That area is fatherhood, and when it comes to their rights to their children after separation, and/or divorce.

If we look through the articles online, and in booklets on custody we will see a great deal of information on what is called conservatorship and in all of these documents the deciding factor is a term called, “the best interest of the child”. In looking at that statement, we would think it would be both parents but it is not.

In Texas, the Family Code gives the father the same rights as the mother as far as custody of the children however that is rarely carried out. The mother is usually granted the position of custodial parent, even if the father is in a better position of stability in order to have the child(ren).

The imbalance has gotten so great until various states are beginning to take action on behalf of the fathers. In Massachusetts, a ballot initiative was created, and approved 85 to 15 percent on protecting the rights of the father. The ballot was an initiative to approve equal legal and physical custody of the children in the case of divorce. This ballot was requesting that “the courts uphold the fundamental rights of both parents to the shared physical and legal custody of their children”. And that state is not the only one requesting this by proposition on behalf of fathers. The Washington Post had an article by Michael Allison Chandler entitled “More than 20 states in 2017 considered laws to promote shared custody of children after divorce.”

One would have to ask; why is this necessary since most custody paperwork state that either parent has the right to conservatorship, or custody? It is because Family Courts use the concept called “best interest of the child” to decide who will hold this position, and that term is wholly subjective. Over the years, this term has been used to give custody, in most cases, to the mother.

Ms. Chandler also states that, “we are led to believe that the plight of fatherless children is caused by husbands walking out on their wives, fathers abandoning their children, and “deadbeat dads” when one of the best-kept secrets in American society today is that two-thirds of divorces are now sought by wives, not husbands”. She claims that the “feminist movement has taught wives that they can seek “liberation” by walking out of their marriage contract and marital duties and still reap the benefits of marriage, i.e. their children and his money.”

In considering the background elements of this controversial topic I interviewed Baba Richard and Sri Namaste Moore, who are “The Infinite Couple” and have a combination of 30+ years of experience, (and success), in dealing with men, women, and couples regarding relationships.

Sri Namaste stated that this basically started with “Women’s Rights” movement, and explained how this played into this situation of mothers being given more rights than fathers in the case of custody.

She elaborated on what two legal rights, which were attached to this movement, brought about:

• Women’s Reproductive Rights:

• Reproductive Rights — claims having the ability to decide whether, and when to have children—are important to women’s socioeconomic well-being and overall health. Research suggests that being able to make decisions about one’s own reproductive life and the timing of one’s entry into parenthood is associated with greater relationship stability and satisfaction.

• AbortionRights:

• AccesstoAbortion-IntheUnitedStates,the1973SupremeCourtcaseRoev.Wade established the legal right to abortion. State legislative and executive bodies nonetheless continue to battle over legislation related to access to abortion, including parental consent and notification and mandatory waiting periods. In addition, public funding for abortion remains a contested issue in many states: federal law has banned the use of federal funds for most abortions since 1977, and currently does not allow the use of federal funds for abortion unless the pregnancy resulted from rape or incest or the woman’s life is in danger. The Affordable Care Act of 2010 reinforces these restrictions, but state Medicaid programs have the option to cover abortion in other circumstances using only state, and no federal funds.

Sri Namaste stated, “Initially, women were supposed to be given Reproductive Rights/Freedoms however a woman had that already, and had already exercised her right when she chose to have unprotected sex. That was/is her exercising her “right to reproduce” by allowing herself to get pregnant. She had a choice to prevent that from happening by several different means.

“Then giving her the sole right to decide to keep the baby, or not, is giving her sovereignty as well. Now she has the right to decide “life or death” with impunity in the case of this child. Even though the child was created by the woman and the man; the father has no rights and even if he wants the baby, (which belongs to him as well), he has no right to it.”

Also, that baby is not “her body”, it is a whole separate entity.

Sri Namaste also stated, “The “double standard” is amazing! If the pregnancy is wanted then, even at the earliest stages, the woman celebrates the pregnancy. She will call the baby “hers”, buys clothes, has a celebration, names the baby, etc. And if she should “miscarry”, (lose the baby), she mourns, has a funeral, etc. HOWEVER, if the pregnancy is unwanted...suddenly it is NOT a baby, it is a fetus – a non-thing.”

I asked her how did all that plays into child custody?

She stated, “Because the woman has already been given “sovereignty” over the baby/fetus before birth so it just carries over when the child is born...she still has those rights. However, everyone should be sovereign over their own life, and when one has a child, that is a “separate” life which belongs to the mother AND the father who made it.”

“Also, because that child is a combination of the mother and the father, she shouldn't be able to make that decision alone, and definitely not on the behalf of the father. The state should be the entity who is stepping in to ensure decisions would be neutral, but they are not.”

I was surprised at how all of this fit together.

In order to get a perspective from a man, from a father’s point of view, and from one who had gone through a divorce and custody within in the court system, I then spoke to Baba Richard, who stated:

“I think fundamentally there is something that is happening here. Once you are a parent then being a good parent is based on time passing and you being engaged in that. In talking about the role of the father, what is happening and is implicit in the whole system is that fatherhood is irrelevant. The “state” is functioning as the “father surrogate” and making decisions as to what the state and the woman are going to do about the child(ren).”

“The father is looked at as an economic contributor at maximum, or somebody that if you refuse, or are not meeting whatever standard they say, economically, then you are punished. The system is already in place that you, father, are here to provide economics so the state and the mother can decide what they are going to do with your resources in order to decide what the future of your child is going to be.”

“Once one starts from a “faulty premise” all decisions after that...none of them can be, “well this is great”, because it is a “domino effect”. Look at fatherhood and motherhood as two parallel lines...train tracks, if you will...equal parallel lines and they must be because they both have equal responsibility for the welfare of what they created. Once we say the only “line” that matters is the motherhood line when going forward, then the fatherhood line veers off...we don’t need that, don’t want that line. So, once you engage with the state those two lines are no longer parallel, and never brought back into parallel. Fatherhood gets a “dotted line” which says “you can pay money but we will decide how often you see the child.”

“Visitation is something you do for someone who is “incarcerated”. You don’t visit your “prodigy”, you don’t “visit” your children, children don’t “visit” you. What are they talking about? Either we ALL visit, or nobody visits. Shared custody by default, NOT an arrangement the father has to negotiate his way into. The presumption should be that BOTH parents will share equal responsibility for raising the child(ren) that they have created between the two of them.”

“When you go into that equation with the idea that “woman create children”, and men- we don’t know what they do...but they are engaged in some level of “malfeasance” or irresponsibility because a child has come forward so now the state needs to come in to make things fair...better...more equitable, for the women. One has to wonder, “how is the state the arbiter between these two people?”

“There is a default belief/assumption that there has been some wrong-doing on the part of the man...the scales are inherently imbalanced and “justice”, the state, is stepping in to balance this inequity. The woman has been victimized by this man through the act of pregnancy and now the state is here to make things right again.”

“You, the woman, being right, and righteous, should be supported in whatever you decide to do. It is impossible for you to not to visit your children because the presumption is that the child is at home, and home is always with YOU.”

However, in the case of the man, let’s bullet point the situation and think like this... “Imagine a world where”:

-You are guilty before the proceedings even start.

-All you will get is a decision as to what level of punishment you will endure.

-You will never be found “not guilty” because this is the nature of things.

-You will incur penalties that are overwhelming in most cases.

There is no court of appeals, the only thing, the most you can get is a lessening of the penalty/sentence but you will have it until the courts decide that you don’t.

“Now where is this? In a foreign country? Or some weird dystopian future where everything has “gone to hell in a handcart”? No, this is what a person live with every day if that person is a MAN, and happen to get divorced from a woman, and there are children involved. Or weren’t married and there are children involved.”

I said, “I don’t understand, why doesn’t the courts give joint custody”? He said...

“It is inherently unfair, and I think that there is a presumption of “guilt” with respect to men who are in court...for whatever reason. When I went for my divorce, the judge, his attitude toward me was hostile for no reason. I am not a criminal, and was not there for an assumption of any criminal activity.”

“While waiting for other people to handle their business I saw many different types of cases. There were people who came through who had committed crimes. I had committed no crime, was only there due to processing a divorce. Me, and this woman, had decided we did not want to go forward in life anymore. I couldn’t understand how I warranted all of this “ire” from the judge? I didn’t know him, personally. We both, (my spouse and I), were there at the same time, and when he talked to her, he was nice, and soft spoken...and then when he talked to me it was, “well, what's this!!!” spoken in anger.

I asked him, “But there are documented “rules” that apply to everybody, even mothers; why aren’t they enforced? He said...

“Because there is another issue as to why things go the way they go. Men are not prepared. Actually, it is almost the opposite of being prepared. They are intentionally unprepared because number one, one of the things that I saw in the four or five guys that I know, including myself when I got divorced, is that they are emotionally exhausted...there is a great deal of stress, strain, etc....and a man has to still keep up everything while all of this going on.”

“One of the things about the linear nature of men is that we, we don't do well with this kind of “stress”. We don’t maintain hatred in “perpetuity”. Even if you look at a man whose been trained as a military soldier...yes, they may be upset about the enemy...but the actual pulling of the trigger, or launching the missile is very dispassionate. This is just a job that he is doing...combatants over there...we got them all right, cool. Let's go home, you know, but they don't usually keep that “emotional charge” every day.

“But it's one of the things about the feminine, and I've seen it, they can hold a grudge. Oh my God...even if the two people haven't been together for decades, kids are grown, and gone on and whatever. And it's like, you want to set her off, mention his name in her presence, and it's just like the day that they got divorced.”

“The point being is that when they go into this court situation, number one, most people don’t have any experience with this...it’s not like buying a car, one gets to do this many times so they know what to expect. When they go into this situation, it's the first time, and they don't know what to think or how it's going to go. Also, all they want is for the pain to stop, and they think that after this, we can be “okay”, it’s official.”

“Most men are at the point where they think, “You know what, I'll start over, whatever car, house, whatever things. I don't care. I don't care about any of that because being able to sleep at night”, even if they have to sleep on a pallet. However, here’s the hinge that door swings on...the men go into this thinking that what she wants is stuff, right? What they find out is what she wants is for him to suffer, and no amount of money, no amount of stuff, all the things that he gave, the “quid to the pro quo” that he thinks is going to happen... doesn’t!” 

And so that's a double whammy because then they're shocked because they're like, wait a minute, I gave you what you said you wanted...all the stuff. I let you have whatever it is that you want up to, and including what I considered the most precious...the care of the children. But now he finds that the woman, the court, and the state are thinking, “how much worse can we make this? What else can we do?” Whatever he thought he was going to give, that's not enough, and he is thinking, “Wait a minute, I gave everything so how can that not be enough? There isn’t anything more to give.” And the courts state, “you better come up with something because now we have rules in place that where we're going from present into the future. And now as a state, we can enforce those rules and say, not only have you given all of your material possessions presently, now we are going to look into the future and you will give all your possessions in perpetuity, or until the child(ren) are 18-21 years old.”

“Suddenly, he comes into this realization that the rules that are imposed upon men in that situation are only for men. There are no equivalent rules for women. So, if he doesn't do whatever the court says, then there are penalties and it is NOT that she can’t do what the court says and “be penalized”, it is because she has no rules!”

Personally, I was shocked, and had nothing else to say.

As I began to research further for the solution(s) to this challenge for “fathers”, I decided to do some research on this topic with “Father’s Rights” organizations. I found three agencies, and interviewed the three men who had started, and/or participated in them. What I found was confirming.

The first person interviewed in this arena was Joshua Banks, who is the Founder/Facilitator of IDADS, (Involved Dads of Action Developing and Succeeding), and he is the Program Coordinator. His agency has been in operation since 2015, and his motivation was dealing with families for 7 years as a Pastor. He assisted 300+ people through online summits, and approximately 80 fathers on a weekly basis.

He states, “It is always better for the child when there is joint custody however the system seems to be in opposition to this. It seems that “best interest of the child” always translate to the Mom. A majority of the fathers I deals with want to be involved in their children’s lives, and the few who are reluctant is due to the “toxicity” of the relationship with the mothers.”

His advice to fathers seeking joint custody to:

Engage the Mom, try to get her “onboard”.

As soon as the child is born, go to child support court, (whether you live together or not), so there will be no risk of “arrears”, (even if you only put payment as $100).  This is because even if you take care of your child, pay bills in the household, etc. the “child support system” does NOT acknowledge/recognize support paid OUTSIDE of their courts. This will make it easier when you go to Family Court regarding custody.

Build Credibility - Employment, shelter, and a proper environment for his child.

Effort - It won’t be easy, and he will have to “fight”.

Involvement - No matter how difficult it is made, stay involved!

Attorney - If at all possible, get an attorney.

His agency is currently involved with the Attorney General’s Father’s Rights Division; Child Protection Services - Father’s Rights Coalition; and the University of Texas - Child and Family Research Partnership under Dr, Osborn. His agency also receives referrals from Child Protective Services.

The second person I interviewed in this area was Isaac Rowe, who is the Founder of “The Man In Me”, and he is the CEO. His agency has been in operation since 2012, and his motivation was seeing the “fatherless sons” in his arena. He was also troubled by what he saw a friend go through not being able to be with his father...saw it from a “child’s” standpoint. He decided to tell fathers to fight for their rights, and more time with their children. He assists 300+ men through conferences, and speaking engagements, and approximately 80-120 men weekly/bi-weekly.

He states, “Joint custody is always best for the child because everyone is doing their part for the sake of that child. A father’s participation beyond “court appointed visitation” is very important, and valuable to the child. The biggest hinderance I have seen is that the judges will rule against fathers, and there is definitely a double standard.”

He doesn’t have much dealings with the agencies in the area however they have helped fathers to come to his meetings. His advice to fathers seeking joint custody is to:

• Try to co-bond with child,(easier when mom is onboard). • Take care of himself,(spiritually, mentally, physically, financially). • Get in programs to better themselves • Don’t give up,or sign over rights, [you will still have to pay child support]. • Show responsibility; employment, housing, etc. • Don’t get behind in child support payment; no child support arrears.

The last person I interviewed in this area was Marcus Griggs, who is the Director of Fatherhood Services at “The Man In Me”. His motivation was having a well-adjusted dad, and see what not having one had done to youth, and men. He transitioned from working with youth to working with men. Also, he saw the “system” was not set-up for “families”, (which included fathers). He assists 30-40 men on an average.

He said, “All the men I deals with want to “father” their children. I feel that it is better for the children to have both parents, and even research has proven that there is damage to children due to a lack of fathers.”

He states the biggest hinderance to fathers is: • They are not a consideration • They have to“jump thru hoops” to qualify which is not done with mothers. 

• Laws are not enforced with mothers.

His advice to fathers seeking custody is to: • Be prepared for an“intake”,which is required of fathers, only. • Get information - know what the requirements are before you go to one. 

• Be employed, have a residence, etc. • Have a willingness to fight for their child(ren).

He also said there is a program called “NCP-Choices” which assist fathers with “back child support” however there may be a qualification that the fathers have a “good” relationship with the mother. He also receives referrals from Child Support Services.

I must say that I did note that each person stated some sort of “appeasing of the mother” as a prerequisite to any possibility of getting joint custody, and even a service. This speaks directly to the bias-ness of that system.

In my research I noted several situations, these included the:

Bias-ness of Judicial Systems in Texas, [and in most states]:

-Fathers have to “appease” the mother in order to get visitation.

-Fathers have to “appease” the mother in order to get joint custody, even when he is qualified.

There are NO rules, requirements, regulations, or qualifications for mothers

Unfairness of the “System”:

• If a woman births a baby, and is unable to take care of it, she gets free

 “Government assistance/subsidies” in the form of:

• Medical Care • Food Stamps • Finances Aid

• Housing – Section 8 vouchers/certificate • Free, or Subsidized Daycare • Earned Income Credit on tax returns

However, if a father creates a baby, and he is unable to support it he gets:

• Excessive child support payments, and if he is unable to pay then:  

-He loses his driver’s license -He is put in jail. -His income tax is garnisheed.

-He is stigmatized, and alienated from his child.

My question is, “Shouldn’t the one chosen to be the CUSTODIAL PARENT be the ONE who is most capable of, and the most responsible in caring for the child with the LEAST amount of assistance from the government”?

Then there is the case(s) of:

There are REQUIREMENTS which the fathers have to achieve, and which have to be PROVEN in order to have visitation, and/or to be “custodial” parent, when the mothers do not.

If mothers do not allow the fathers to see their child on the appointed days, the courts do not enforce his rights, or penalize her behavior.  The father’s are sent to a different court for that.

Fathers are required to take “fathering classes/counseling” and to pay for them, while this is never required of the mother.

In my reviewing the “Standard Possession Order and Parenting Time” on the TXACCESS. ORG website I found the “visitation schedule” that is given to fathers, (yearly time given to spend with their child(ren)):

The schedule of time assigned to fathers in order to see their children are “every first and third weekend, every fifth weekend, 2 hours on Weds. or Thurs. each week”, every other holiday week, and 30 days in the summer. This amount to, (yearly-2020):

Regular Weekends = 48 days

Fifth Weekends = 8 days

Thursdays - 2 hours = 4.3 days

Alternate Hours

• Sub-Total is: 60.3 days a year

Holidays Weeks - alternate between odd/even years (additional 7 days when it is his year).

Summer Vacation - 30 days • Total of 90.3 to 97.3 days a year! That is not even 1/3 of the year!!!

As I began to look at the negative impact on fathers when the mothers are the “custodial parent” I realized something. As a mother of 4 adult children, and 18 grandchildren I realize that women learn how to be “good mothers” by being with their child(ren) on consistent, daily, hands-on basis. When fathers only have “visitation rights” that is minimal access. They do not get the opportunity to properly develop “fathering abilities”, to learn and grow with their child(ren), and/or to actually experience being a “father”. Also, if they aren’t as good at it as mom, then they are penalized for not being “good” at something they were not allowed to do by the court systems, and the mothers, who didn’t allow it.

Finally, there is another challenge to this...according to the US Department of Human Services/Child Protection Resources Online, mothers were more likely to abuse their children than fathers at a percentage of 70.6% vs 29.4%.

According to Allie Morris, of the San Antonio Express-News, it is reported that in 2018, 211 children had died from child abuse in Texas. It is also noted that in half of those deaths, CPS- Child Protection Services had been investigating the cases. If the statistics are true, (from CPS), then in most of those cases the mothers had custody. I have to wonder how many of those cases were because the children were allowed to remain with the mothers, instead of being given to the fathers.

Also, why are courts, and CPS, ignoring this information instead of making it a consideration when determining who would be in the “best interest of the child”?

As you can see, there is a need for legislation to be put in place not only to “protect” fathers from the bias-ness of what is already in place, but children as well. There needs to be a revision of the Judicial System on the behalf of fathers and their children for the future.

[deathboundinautumn]

@psychcdelica​ is giving me one of my first headcanon prompts in a good while and sends:

How does Shinji feel about having kids? ( w Mitsuru or Red esp )

ooc: Hooo boi do I have some thoughts.  This is headcanon stuff right? Haven’t done stuff like this in a minute so lets do et.

P3 Verse (or no tags because by default everything occurs here)

This is so far off his radar it’s not even something he’s ever considered in recent memory.  Maybe as a kid/before Oct 4th (the first one) he’s maybe considered it in a ‘well one day i’d like to be successful and have a family’ but even then he might just have only considered that because that’s what most people say?

Growing up as an orphan meant that he never really had the traditional family dynamic.  He had to create his own which he found in Mikki and Akihiko and then later Mitsuru.  In a lot of the commentary from the character designer/concept artist they really reinforce this idea of Shinji and Akihiko’s relationship being stronger and closer than most familial bonds and I really do believe that those two (and Mitsuru) are each others family and since they’re so young he’s never really considered (seriously) the idea of having kids.

Let’s talk about after Oct. 4th.  Everything changes after Oct. 4th (duh) so this is something he definitely would be strongly against.  He already feels like a danger to himself and everyone else around him which is why he mostly keeps to himself.  On top of that the whole ‘looming death’ thing and living on limited time makes the thought of having kids something he can’t even consider since he won’t be alive long enough to make that a reality (since I can’t even imagine him being a father while they’re still in highschool).

Let’s say he lives past P3 aka P4 or P5 verse (Road to Avalon/Avalon)

Shinji living past Oct 4th (round 2) does spark a change in his personality/resolve and if anything its more of a revert to how he used to be before Oct 4th (1st one) but he’s wiser and more mature due to the trauma/experience he’s gained from walking the other path (one much closer to Strega) more so than Akihiko and Mitsuru he understands pain and guilt in a way they cannot having been engrossed so deeply by it to the point of exiling himself from his own family. 

I strongly recommend taking a look at this fan-comic as it explains the revert in his personality + gaining his newfound resolve/will to live and while I headcanon that Shinji would NOT gain a new persona, rather Castor will be made available to its fullest potential instead.  I have been very heavily considering adapting/adopting this same exact persona later down the line around/during the events of Persona 5 (while giving due credit to the original origins of this headcanon as its not technically mine of course).

While you might be thinking but he’s already had to go through so much more than everyone else!  Why not just give him a new persona after taking a bullet from evil Jesus and living???  To that I say you, you’re wrong. The rest of the Senpai Squad has gone through just as much as he has.

Mitsuru feels the guilt of her family’s legacy (grandpa did the bad thing), the despair of (assuming Shinji lives) maybe losing Shinji/him being in a coma forever AND mourning the loss of her father PLUS the responsibility of the Kirjio company being thrust upon her.  

Akihiko has to deal with the guilt of losing his sister which blindly motivates him to become even stronger, sacrificing his own mental well-being and healing for the sake of training.  The despair at losing his best friend (Oct 4th round 1) and not being able to save him (Shinji) from himself only for that to be taken a step further by not being able to bring him back to them which results in Shinji getting fucking shot and maybe dying in a hospital bed before he gains his resolve (for Shinji’s sake).

Shinji has always been different from the other two.  While information is scarce, Shinji has always struggled much more with mastering Persona than Mitsuru or Akihiko did and mostly forced himself to do so out of fear of being left behind by his friends.  So I believe gaining a new Persona would be more difficult for him than it was for them.  The difference between Shinji’s journey and theirs is that he’s the only one that took an actual bullet for the cause.  Besides I think unlocking Castor’s true potential is a much more profound way of telling the story of self-acceptance than just giving him a new persona outright.   The way i’ve always thought about it is after surviving P3 Castor’s appearance would change.  Castor would no longer be impaled on his own sword, instead he’d be wielding both sword and shield.  A representation of Shinjiro’s own will/determination to defend his friends family.

In fact I believe another major change would have to occur in his life for such a change in resolve to also occur.

Long tangent but I feel to fully explain myself I need people to understand where I’m coming from.

I think Shinji would still feel kind of bad initially at finding out they’d be having kids.  Mainly because ‘holy shit you already work so hard and now you’re pregnant’ also, despite knowing it doesn’t matter to her, the backlash she may face for being with this nobody isn’t a great look for the company and again adds more work she has to do to prove herself.  All that being said, it’d be impossible to deny how happy he would be at having a child with the woman he’s loved for so long.  He never thought he’d ever get this far much less with her.  So he’d do everything he can to be there to love and support both of them in every way he could.  She’s not in this alone.  He’s not in this alone.

Hey remember that major life changing event that would need to occur for his Persona to evolve?  Yeah this would be it.

With Red AKA the Transistor-verse (See You In the Country)

I definitely think something like this would be something they’d actually talk about.  While Shinji or Castor in this verse wouldn’t be against the idea of having kids with Red he would float the idea of considering adoption being an orphan himself (though whether she knows that or not depends).  That being said if they chose to have their own I’d imagine what the outcome would do to their respective careers.  Obviously she’d have to take time off from her busy career during the pregnancy and after, but having grown up without any sort of parental figure he wouldn’t want to be absent from their life as much as he might be running the Phlegethôn.  So it’s very likely that leading up to their kids’ birth that he’d have the Phlegethôn open every day for longer hours than he’s ever done before to bring in as much revenue as possible to support the fact that for almost half a year he’d shut the restaurant down to help out after their child is born.  

Once they’ve gotten the swing of things he’s start opening up again with shorter hours so that his days aren’t ending at 2 AM.  He’d definitely not want for her to give up her career either and I definitely believe the two could create a schedule where both of them can still be doing their own thing while also making time for their family.

Also at some point during the pregnancy I’d imagine he would come clean (if he hasn’t already) about his origins and his life before he took the name Castor.  

[sepulcrorum]

JUDE LAW, FIFTY, ARCHBISHOP DE MEDICI. ❝ ⤚⟶ EUROPE, 1458. thanks is given by the DUCHY OF FLORENCE, ARCHBISHOP GIANCARLO DI GIAN GASTONE DE’ MEDICI, from FLORENCE. they are at best CHARMING, and at their worst IMPIOUS. whilst abroad, their ambition is to REAP EVER MORE GREATER LUXURIES FOR HIMSELF. HE seems to remind everyone of JUDE LAW & DESIRES BOTH HERETICAL AND UNHOLY : THE SONG OF SOLOMON SPILLING FORTH FROM ONE’S LIPS WHILST IN THE THROES OF PASSION ; INTELLECTUALISM SOUGHT FOR HEDONISM’S SAKE : ANTIQUATED TEXTS SMUGGLED FROM THE CRUMBLING REMNANTS OF ANCIENT ROMAN VILLAS AND DISPLAYED TO EXPECTED LOOKS OF AWE ; & HOLINESS FOUND, HOLINESS LOST, HOLINESS REVERED : A CERTAIN SLANT OF LIGHT SHINING THROUGH HIGH-VAULTED ARCHES. ❞

introduction

Provide a blurb introducing your character generally. This should include an overview of strengths, weaknesses, aspirations, and set backs.

It has been once said by the Lord: be ye like children, for ye to enter the Kingdom of God. Capricious, selfish, absorbed only by thoughts of himself, petty, and whimsical, the Archbishop de’ Medici does not assume the dignity of his station as a member of the Church but he does assume all the qualities of a child in him, and that makes him saved by default.

His theology is quaint, bordering on unorthodox, and it’s almost tempting to call him out for heresies but he knows too much about Scripture and can run circles around any fellow servant of Christ, much more the ordinary layman. He’s either mystical or absolutely canonical: at a certain point in theology, everything becomes one and the same. Give him time, and he can justify anything—the cruellest of acts as well as the most compassionate acts of goodwill and charity—with verses pulled from the Holy Book and the most seraphic smile on his face, almost as if his lips are intoning a blessing. He’s a Devil’s advocate in perhaps more ways than one, the destruction of Rome entire as one itinerant preacher once called him, and yet he luxuriates on wealth on top of the social pyramid, secure in his position and backed by the splendorous wealth made available by his family’s support.

Yet despite all this, despite possessing all the qualities of a man who could be—intelligent, charming, sociable, and ambitious—Giancarlo ended up being the man who isn’t, by some strange (perhaps cruel) twist of fate. With his dubious origins erasing any hope for a cardinalate, much less a chance for the Throne of St. Peter, he languishes in his role as a mere archbishop. As the years pass, he has turned bitter, cruel, recalcitrant—for what does a child do when they are given what they want?

They throw a tantrum.

What are some potential plotlines you are interested in pursuing?

I’ve inserted the little nuggets of the plotlines I plan to pursue on the blurb but to expand on it:

First is I am definitely very interested in making him a Cardinal and that is very much a thing he also wants for himself, even as much as he denies it and says he never wanted it anyway. It’s a way for him to rationalise the fact that, strictly speaking, his life didn’t go the way he wanted it to go, and so he subsists on the lie that his life (as it is right now) was what he always wanted—but ultimately, I do think that he’s still on the lookout for any opportunity to finally have the red robes of a cardinal.

Second is the state of Florence and of Italy as a whole. The blemish of the riots on the Florentines’ reputation is something that must be rectified—not even because someone died (after all, very many people die everyday) but because it sends the message that they are unable to control their own people. The Church as an institution that does much works of charity can be used to pacify the rebellious masses and perhaps turn them into the better angels that they haven’t been before. Meanwhile, Italy as a whole concerns him because they are still, ultimately, disparate nation-states with differing goals and ambitions. In a world filled with empires and hegemons, Giancarlo realises that the Italian peoples must unite—far better that it be headed, of course, by the Church or by Florence, but unity itself is non-negotiable. If the Italians do not want to be swallowed up by their neighbours, they must pool together their resources and make a stand for their existence.

Thirdly is the option of interfaith dialogue. Giancarlo is by no means perfect, but I do imagine he’s a touch more tolerant than most holy men are. He’s less a crusader and more of a diplomat, far too disillusioned to really believe in any cause of holy war. Entrenched in cynicism—usually a character flaw—he’s cognisant enough of the fact that humans are going to be shitty one way or another, and religion has almost no bearing on whether one is a good person or not. As such, I do think he has a lot of plotting potential for those characters following a different faith, and it’s fun to see how that might all play out.

three bullet-points.

Giancarlo di Gian Gastone de’ Medici is born a stain of shame. Birthed by a servant-girl and the man from whom his name marks out as his progenitor, he is kept by his father as a spare heir—only to be tossed away when a legitimate one finally comes. In this act, his father has taught him the harsh realities of life: one minute, you can have everything in front of you; the next, it all comes crashing down with nothing to show for it. He is left with no security save that which his father carved out for him: mastery of an abbey at twelve years of age and, from there, the religious life. There was nothing else for him. There is nothing else to him.

Giancarlo takes to the intellectual and monastic life quite quickly. His learning under humanist tutors in the household of his father has enabled him to take quickly to reading dense texts that speak of grand contexts. It helps that he is good with languages, and that he is friendly to everyone he meets. How bright his career would be, some would say, before adding: if only he wasn’t illegitimate. And so that stain of shame that adorned the Medici family history now mars his own future: he was always going to be a mistake, and the world will never let him forget it.

He is, by all accounts, a very disenchanted man who works himself through a façade of mustered charm gathered from who-knows-where with his mind an utter repository of Scripture and theological concepts. He can quote from Papal Bulls enacted centuries ago as easily as if they had been dictated to him just that moment; yet he always says it so drily that you’d think he’s mocking the words he’s citing. He’s in the habit of mentioning what kind of sins one is doing but always concludes it with a small note of how God is a forgiving God. He delights in the company of the wicked and the infamous; truly good people disgust him. He thinks God is present more in ugliness than any kind of beauty exemplified in art and song, and that He is dirt-covered, bloody and bruised, made with mulch and rot and diseased flesh. His God is filthy; it is only natural. We all fashion God into the form that would accept us the most.

character sheet.

FULL NAME :  giancarlo di gian gastone de’ medici TITLES :  

commander of badia fiorentina ( from 1420 - 1428 )

commander and rector of badia fiorentina ( from 1428 onwards )

metropolitan archbishop of florence ( from 1446 onwards  )

master of the sacred apostolic palace ( from 1450 onwards )

BIRTHPLACE :  florence, italian peninsula

AGE : fifty, b. 10 november 1407

LANGUAGES : fluent — italian ( tuscan ), french, ancient greek, latin, arabic, spanish, german, bavarian ; conversational — english, portuguese ; learning — ottoman turkish, farsi / persian

DYNASTY / HOUSE: house de’ medici

MOTHER & FATHER : unnamed servant girl & gian gastone de’ medici

SPOUSE : none

ISSUE : none

SIBLINGS : giovanni, lucrezia, and girolamo ( half-siblings )

OTHER : lorenzo de’ medici ( tbd )

ZODIAC : scorpio sun / sagittarius moon / scorpio rising

RELIGIOUS AFFILIATION : roman catholicism

ORIENTATION : bisexual biromantic ( with a medium to high preference for his own gender )

PERSONALITY TYPE : estj-a / choleric-sanguine / enneagram tbd / slytherin

VICES : everything

VIRTUES : knowledge can be and is a virtue but not with giancarlo, babyyyyy

FACECLAIM : jude law

HEIGHT : 6′1″ or 1.85m

RECOGNISABLE FEATURES : kindly-seeming blue eyes that speaks to unfathomable depths — look too closely, and you just might find yourself falling in them; an ever-present smile that can turn earnest or mocking depending on the conversation; a smug demeanour that you can’t help but feel that he thinks he knows better than you

REPUTATION IN PORTUGAL :  a famed master theologian but also a widely known libertine, giancarlo both attracts and repulses the whole of christendom with his easy smiles, his kindly-looking blue eyes, and the power of the storied lineage that has produced him. for all those who’ve had the chance to coalesce in rome—or perhaps even the italian peninsula—his name will revoke memories of scandalised whispers erupting from people huddled in corners as soon as they see him make entry into a room. portugal as of yet is a new frontier, not for reasons of lack of opportunity but due to lack of interest. after all, why stray from that eternal city whose glory is sung in ancient ballads and whose place in the world is the envy of millions? now that he is here, however, he is more than eager to make his mark.

WANTED CONNECTIONS :

i sought whom my soul loves — were giancarlo any other man, they could have been together, a couple enjoined in the warm embrace of love and unity; yet, alas, the Church has bound giancarlo to herself, and he is a weak and foolish man who cannot find himself able to stand up to anybody. ever since then, their meetings have been few and far between—but no less precious to giancarlo, no less treasured, no less sought for.  :::  (  open to anyone, preferably female but any gender can technically work !  )

a young deer on the mountains of Bether — arcadian idyll had been the theme of their shared years, wild and wandering, when responsibility had been a far off concept that seemed as foreign as greying hair and the yoke of adulthood. they frolicked in sun-kissed green-topped hills and ran as carefree as the wind. now they are old, both with their respective offices, and there is nothing else to them save nostalgia over lost innocence—if they had innocence at all.  :::  ( open to anyone of the same age range as giancarlo !  )

beautiful as the moon, clear as the sun —  a look at them and they’re like fourteen again, dumbstruck and awed, ashamed of his own lowly station and the stain of his origins—yet now they are old, and they have significantly more resources available to them now than they had before. giancarlo has always loved what he has thought is lacking within himself; he has always sought the true, the good, and the beautiful. he deludes himself into thinking he’s found it in god, but he is about to discover he’s wrong.  :::  ( open to anyone !  )  

with my royal people’s chariots — people have the propensity to think that giancarlo’s last name and relative wealth and status makes him the gatekeeper to the pope’s favour. he does not think himself as holding the keys to anything, but he lets other people do—mainly because it affords him the simulation of power the likes of which he only imagined as a child. of course, there is no real backing to the promises he says he’ll fulfil for them, but it is a merry show nonetheless and a piece of theatre that giancarlo’s keen to continue in lisboa.  :::  ( open to anyone who’s looking to curry favour with the pope !  )  

you who dwell in the gardens — there are many blooms in the garden of God’s creation and it is not a stretch to say giancarlo is absolutely besotted with the idea of experiencing all of them. this meet in lisbon might prove to be a more fortuitous moot than the one in florence, and he is always keen to start dialogue with any and all those who would like to exchange knowledge for knowledge’s sake, even those that the rest of christendom would not welcome.  :::  ( open to non-christian characters !  )  

the shadows flee away — giancarlo isn’t known for moderation and temperance; he has always been one driven to excess, and he has never toned down his appetites for the sake of any cause or person. he is a flit of a thing, a butterfly eager to sap the nectar out of any willing flower before moving to the next, willing to spill honey-laced words out of cherubic lips if that is what it took to mark one as his next conquest. in this, he has doubtless transgressed against many, and there are some whose memories run long and whose desire for correction would cover even those who are consecrated to God.  :::  ( open to anyone !  )   

[tumblunni]

Misc thoughts of rambling development for my new yokai watch ocs family of hugs and sadness (blythe the Dimmy and amber the Gorgeous Ambassador)

* Amber was totally still Gorgeous Ambassador at heart even back when he was human. I feel like he probably dressed very plain and was very self concious for a long time, as well as also being poor as dirt so it wasnt really easy to be super fashion time. Perhaps the only way he was really able to be remotely flambouyant or pretty was just having a long ponytail that he was very proud of. It would have been easier to maintain a shorter hairstyle when you're struggling to even find somethibg to eat each day let alone a bath, but it just helped him hold on to a tiny bit of confidence. Even when he reincarnated as Gorgeous Ambassador he was still unconfident for a long time and it took all these centuries to fully embrace The Power Of Gorgeous. He was probably really shocked when he got his medal registered and heard his new yokai name, like uhh excuse me "must beautiful man who spreads beauty through the world with his smile" are you sure there hasnt been a mixup??? And nowadays he's become so happy with himself that he maybe dresses a little bit gaudy sometimes, but if you saw how he used to feel then you'd absolutely be cheering for him!

* he was probably worried that Blythe wouldn't recognise him when he finally managed to reunite with them, but i think the lil shadow ghost instantly knew it was their brother and ran straight into the biggest hug ever. "Im worried they'll think im all cringe and gaudy" NO UR LIL SIB IS IN AWE OF YOUR FASHION POWER AND HAPPY FOR YOUR CONFIDENCE

* I also think Amber would absolutely be proud of how much confidence Blythe has gained through travelling with the protagonist and co. Like "aaa the last time i saw you you were so tiny and shy!" "Yes, now i'm tall and shy!" "NUUUU STOP PUTTING YOURSELF DOWN"

* basically they are absolutely Shyness Fam, and Amber just approaches his anxieties differently with over-the-top fake boasting about his greatness instead of being honest about how bad he feels. So thats why itd be so heartwarming to see him genuinely making progress and genuinely seeing good parts of himself. ALL THANKS TO THE INTERNATIONAL GORGEOUSNESS ASSOCIATION OF THE AFTERLIFE, YES *cheesy makeover ads fly by in the background*

* Dimmy's fave food is rice balls not just cos ninja monster = rice balls, but cos for Blythe specifically it brings back happy memories of backstory ninja Amber in ye olden days packing lunches of love for his tiny friend. He was always broke in between finding bountys to hunt, so he was never able to cook anything too fancy, but those simple meals became associated with childhood in Blythe's heart. All the times this big strong human swordsman would have a moment of gentleness and offer his last bit of food to a useless little yokai like them. ("No!! You're a valued part of the team!! And growing children need this more than i do!! Besides, i'm so tough i don't need to eat." *stands up for a minute and blacks out*)

* Since this backstory took place before thee yokai watch was invented, you cant technically say Amber was Blythe's previous watchholder but like.. He totally was? Same formula of being a human you partner with and then go around fighting/befriending other yokai. I like to think that maybe before yokai medals became the latest trend and they set up the whole official regulated medal registration process, yokai would still give their human friends some sort of token of their friendship but it was just less organised. Like imbuing their soul energy into all sorts of shit like This Leaf I Found or One Shoe. Which could be used in the same way to summon them but obv was less conveinient, haha! I'm thinking maybe Blythe's bond object was just a neat rock, cos they were so young and didnt really own anything else to gift to this human. Like all they had was the coal from the hearth in the house they used to haunt, but thatd be too crumbly so they dug through to find the sturdiest and prettiest rock and Amber was like straigjt up crying from how touched this whole thing made him. I WILL TREASURE THIS PEBBLE MY TINY MONSTER CHILD...

* oh but just to rub salt in the wound i think he couldnt find it again when he woke up floating over his own burned corpse in the wreckage of his final fateful battle. There uhh..wasnt much of himself left, let alone anything he was holding. Itd kinda have to be that way cos if it worked like a yokai medal itd mean Amber could have instantly reunited with his friend and cut out all of these years of sad backstory, alas

* ok but imagine the cute and sweet emotionalness of then being able to swap medals when they see each other again, and have an actual magical guarantee of never losing their family ever again.

* I feel like Amber only initially agreed to join the Gorgeous Association because he wanted to get a job in the yokai world and save up to buy a decent house and decent level of income so that there would be a hapoy home waiting for his child whenever he finally found them. He didnt really believe that he had the potential to be a fashion icon, he just went along with it as an employment opportunity in his weird new ghost life. But OH NO, accidental self confidence!! (We are all very proud of him)

* oh and the Gorgeous Association doesnt work 100% identical to the anime version, i just like the anime's general concept. I feel like Gorgeous Ambassador is indeed a yokai species and not just a title, its less 'you were chosen by random lottery' and more 'you were chosen by destiny'...? Shy people who have potential to be fashion icons just tend to end up becoming the shy-people-with-potential-to-become-fashion-icons yokai, aka this. And the Gorgeous Association takes responsibility for finding all new Gorgeouses and training them to use their new powers instead of just staying in their shyness. Its more of a self help club? Oh and also the membership is full of other types of fashion yokai too, its not just Gorgeous Ambassadors. Just its only Gorgeous Ambassadors that get visited by the president as soon as they die and given a special invitation to join. So basically interpreting Gorgeous Ambassador as more 'this yokai is named that cos its powers are about encouraging people to be more confident aka introducing them to the world of fashion'. And less the idea that all Gorgeous Ambassadors used to be a different type of yokai and you can only become one by being picked by the club lottery. And also that its just a costume with no actual powers?? That was funny in the anime but i prefer if they actually could inspirit people and make them more confident and stuff.

* I FEEL LIKE IM EXPLAINING THIS BADLY, SORRY! Ok so uhh like yknow some clubs are all exclusive entry "you are not this thing til you join"? Like you cant be a country club member til you join the country club, and the sense of comeraderie there is just all being rich enough to pay for membership rather than having anything in common. But then there's stuff like lgbt groups or mental health support groups where youre all already the same thing and thats WHY you join the club. Anime version had Gorgeous Association be a country club and Gorgeous Ambassador be just a membership name rather than a real yokai form. Which, again, was really funny but i feel like it only works in a more gag focused series like the anime. Here i'm interpreting it that you can just be born in the species Gorgeous Ambassador, same as any other yokai like jibanyan or whatever, and it actually does have its own special powers and stuff. And its just that the Gorgeous Association sends out invites to any newborn yokai that have fashion related powers. So not all Gorgeous Ambassadors actually join the Gorgeous Association. Oh and Kageusuo is the actual yokai species name for those unaffiliated ones. The anime seemed to say that kageusuo was an unrelated new yokai that isnt in the games, that was just invented to have a form that Gorgeous Ambassador had before he became Gorgeous Ambassador. But i have Other Ideas

* i'll make it a new bullet point cos im getting all disorganized now aaaa

* ok so Kageusuo (or my fanmade eng dub name Shamshade) is Gorgeous Ambassador. Same thing. Same species. Kageusuo is a yokai personifying the idea of a fashionable beautiful person who never reached their potential in life due to social anxiety/bullying. Like an 'ugly duckling' story. Their default form is this shadowy looking depressed dude because their power is that they drain shadows from people, vampire style. This makes you 'less overshadowed", so you become more confident and people notice your unique style! But kageusuo cant use its powers on itself, so a lot of them stay in this shy form forever and just continue repeating the same overshadowed life they have as a human. The fabulous form that Gorgeous Ambassador has in the games is just simply the same yokai dressing differently- a kageusuo that managed to conquer its anxieties from its past life and take steps to embrace its true self! But theyre not actually any different in terms of powers, theyre still shadow vampires and their power to make people fabulous is just them eating your shadow. It was something they could already do before they became fabulous themself, now theyre just confident enough to match their powers, yknow? And also unrelatedly there's a club called Gorgeous Association that this particular kageusuo joined, which personally helped him in his journey of self confidence so he goes by the nickname Gorgeous Ambassador to advertise it. (Which is even more nicknamed into Amber cos he thinks it sounds cute)

* WHY ARE MY HEADCANONS SO OVERCOMPLICATED AAAaa

* anyway just imagine a vampire movie but its a supermodel lurching out of the shadows groaning "I VANT TO SUCK YOUR ANXIETY" and then when he bites you you become more confident. This is a Good Concept so i will somehow find a way to use it, dammit!! *b movie music* "OH NO THE MONSTER GOT TERRY" *terry suddenly wearing applebottom jeans*

* also imagine all of that but also the dude is a weird samurai being all "wow the wonders of the future" about thos applebottom jeans

* why do all my headcanons start as angst and end up as nonsense like this

[davidmann95]

I read your post about why Batman is great and I love how thoughtful that is. Can you do one for Superman? Thanks ^_^

Unsurprisingly, I’ve touched on a lot of the basic aspects of it before, so for a couple parts of this I’ll keep it restrained (speaking entirely relatively), but given I think about Superman more than most people think about their best friends, I feel qualified to state that yes: Superman is great. As I said with Batman, the reasons why on a mass cultural basis are much broader than ‘he’s a really well-written character’ - hell, too often that isn’t even the case, even if plenty *have* stepped up over the years - so I’ll start with the lizard hindbrain stuff and work my way down to the finer details.

Superman has iconic power by default

What it really comes down to, at least in terms of keeping him afloat in the public eye when actual public opinion on him has been shot completely to hell over the last couple decades, is that Superman is a Big Deal. He’s the founder of his own genre: literally every surface-level aspect of his mythology is shorthand for the concept he created as well as for plenty beyond superheroes, from the suit (trunks included) to Lois Lane to Lex Luthor to Clark Kent to flying to Kryptonite to Bizarro and Brainiac to super-pets and x-ray vision. A red cape fluttering in the breeze is itself an evocative image entirely sans context, because people know that means him, by which it really means all superheroes. That means he takes the hits of getting all the complaints other characters duck even as others write thinkpieces on his place in culture and how he represents everything from America to Jesus to conservative values to the immigrant experience, all from people who may well have never picked up a comic or watched a cartoon of his in their lives. Even when most people don’t know much about him as a character, he as a symbolic figure is too massive to not grapple with one way or another, even via shorthand such as ‘he’s dumb’ or ‘he stands for us at our best’; while many of his recent woes can be traced back to people telling stories solely about or defined by that iconography, it still has power. Kids on the other side of the world from wherever you’re sitting right now know he can leap a tall building in a single bound. There’s maybe two or three other fictional characters in the world with that level of exposure and impact, and the unconscious emotional connection that comes baked right into it.

Superman is a protector

When kids talk about loving him because he can do anything, and adults talk about how he brings back those memories of joy and comfort, I think this is what it really comes down to a lot of the time. Superman’s the one who looks out for us, the guy who cares about you. Yeah, there’s gotta be the odd story about how NOT EVEN SUPERMAN CAN SAVE EVERYONE! to keep him honest, but by and large, yes he can. He wears a fun flashy uniform and he can wrap you up in his cape and fly you away from whatever bad’s happening, and even if something can catch up, no bullet or bomb in the world is going to get through him to you, or even hurt him enough to at least be scary. Nothing’s so hard or so big or so scary he can’t help, not really; he naps on clouds and swims in the sun. He’s polite, and never aggressive towards the innocent (not even that often towards the guilty), and he doesn’t talk down to people even though he’s stronger and knows better. He’s as confident as a cool big brother, as supportive and sturdy as a good dad, as vaguely ethereal and perfectly impossible as Santa Claus. It’s not an act, it’s not impersonal - he wants you to be okay, he cares about you and he’ll do whatever he can to make sure you’ll be alright. When that’s done just right? That kind of unreserved, unconditional, powerful demonstration of kindness making a difference, even from a cartoon alien, can knock a lot of typically steely emotional walls down like balsa wood, especially when that can save the day just as much as quick wits or a fist, the way anyone here could too in the right circumstances when they try their best.

Superman is a romantic figure

Something overlooked or deliberately sidelined by many is that a huge, huge part of Superman’s appeal in lots of circles is that he can be a romantic ideal rather than (or as well as) a protective one. He’s a sweet, funny, confident, smart guy who’s built like Adonis and doesn’t think he’s better than everybody else even though he’s literally the best. He holds down a socially valuable job he’s successful and happy at, he’s gentle and considerate, and he’s entirely comfortable being second in his household to a commanding career woman who he’s instinctively protective of, but also willing to back off of when she feels smothered because he acknowledges her independence. He can fly her to the moon, he never lets her forget how happy he is that when he was left lost and alone on the other side of the universe he fell to the one place he could find her, and he wears tights. The comics may forget that, but Lois & Clark knew it. Smallville sure as hell knew it. So have the last couple movies, and Supergirl. Even Christopher Reeve, America’s Dad, got it on with Margot Kidder in that weird shiny Fortress hammock. You wanna talk about the aspects of Superman that go for…ahem…primal instincts, that he’s the member of the Justice League historically most likely to go shirtless* is worth bringing up. 

* Aside from maybe Batman, who’s usually beat to hell and too miserable to leverage any of that playboy charm, and Aquaman, who’s Aquaman.

Superman is an easy power fantasy

Obviously, superheroes are often power fantasies in general; they do stuff we can’t do but wish we could. And Superman’s near the top of that list not just because he’s iconic, and not even because of the scope of his power - Green Lantern and Thor are comparable in terms of raw ability, GL even has an honest-to-goodness wishing ring, but they don’t measure up in that regard. What is is, I think, is that Superman’s powers are rooted in physicality, and therefore easy to imagine yourself doing. Everything most people can do, he does best, from lifting to running to looking to hearing to punching. Even his non-physical powers have a connection to actual physical acts: to see through objects he focuses as if peering through a fog, he doesn’t shoot power blasts from his fists to light things on fire but instead burns them with a furious glare, he doesn’t dispassionately levitate through the air as a standard but takes off and holds his arms forward as if in a mighty never-ending leap. Batman may be ‘real’, but if you imagined suddenly being him, you wouldn’t be Batman, you’d be a rich dude with a weaponized theme park in his basement, because you have no training and no tangible point of reference for thinking of how anything works beyond “punch and throw things”. But it’s easy to imagine being Superman in a visceral, physical sense - just imagine everything you did worked optimally, even the way it only could in a dream.

Superman is fun

All of the above makes him grand and likable, but that’s not the same as being able to support decades of monthly adventure stories. The basis of that is that he lives in a universe-sized, Earth-shaped toybox. He doesn’t just have superpowers and a nifty suit, he’s got a cave at the North Pole right near Santa with a time machine, statues of all his friends, a space zoo, a gun that turns people into ghosts, and a bottle city full of real people, plus robots to keep it all tidy, and only he can get in because the key was forged in the heart of a star. His cousin, kid, dog, and a few of his best friends wear capes too, and his ‘brother’ with reverse-superpowers lives on a cube planet where it’s perpetually opposite day. His friends and wife often go on their own adventures and get temporary superpowers just by being in his vicinity, he dated a mermaid in college, his after-school club was in the future and he commutes to the moon for work, and his deadliest enemies include a crazed mad scientist, an evil robot with a death-heart, a mischievous imp in a derby hat, and brilliant alien computer literally named Brainiac. Superman lives in a sci-fi fantasy dreamland of childish archetypes that can exist on any scale from the microscopic to the galactic to the other-dimensional, and as a result of that he can go on any adventure imaginable, to any time and place, and as a super-man who doesn’t often have to worry for his own safety, he can survive and appreciate and care for it all.

Superman mythologizes the mundane

And it’s where the fun and the big, mythic aura Superman carries meet that the magic happens that makes him as versatile and effective a character as there is in fiction: everything he does is rooted in something incredibly normal and human. His wild super-suit of circus royalty is made to reconnect with his heritage the only way he has, and to try and make himself colorful and unthreatening to a world he needs to accept him. When he travels through time, it’s never just to save reality, it’s to go see family and friends. He walks his dog around the rings of Saturn, he looks at his city in a bottle and wonders if he’ll ever be able to get around to taking care of that, he walks on the bottom of the ocean to think things through privately, and spends an entire day saving the world to get away from a conversation he doesn’t want to have. Every mad, cosmic aspect of his world is something totally normal blown up to be as big as it feels, and even when he does interact with the truly ‘mundane’, his presence alone elevates it to myth in a way no other superhero can. That’s the true source of his ability to adapt, rarely tapped but always potent: he can do anything, because he’s us.

Superman’s an actual good, interesting character

I place this at the bottom because it’s the aspect that’s most rarely captured, especially in the public eye (though the handful of times it has been are why he’s my favorite). But when he’s handled properly, then even divorced from everything else, Superman is fascinating as a *person*. Raised knowing there’s something different about him even as his weird alienness lets him understand people and the world around them in ways no others can, he learned one day he was born of the most mind-shattering act of cosmic horror imaginable, with a place greater than Earth in every way destroyed by coincidence, a signpost by any measure that the universe is a chaotic, meaningless, cruel place that destroys the innocent with indifference…and he became a good man who treasures life over anything. He has power that lets him do literally anything he pleases, and he spends half his life among us at a desk job because he thinks we’re just swell and he wants to keep being part of it all. Even though he can never entirely, not really, divvying his life up into discrete, manageable chunks that let him interact with the world on his own terms and try to see through what he sees as his responsibility, until a woman sees through the deception and self-deception and gets the real him to tentatively come out. 

He has fun little hobbies, and unusual friendships, and a complex rivalry with the one man in the world who could’ve been his equal. He’s seen the best and worst of the world, and he accepts it all, but he still radiates a decency and innocence that can be mistaken for naivete by those who don’t know him. He’s clever but easy to catch off-guard in the right circumstances, always struggling to be the god people expect him to be rather than the inadequate fake his humility can make him look at himself as, he likes football and pretzels and pulp novels and Metallica, he gets a kick out of writing because it’s one of the few things he can do on an even playing field, he’s not sure how best to raise his kid, he worries that that one alien dictator is going to pop by again soon and he might not be ready to deal with it, he has to coordinate dates with his wife precisely because they both have such busy schedules, he counts dust particles in the air when he gets bored, and he believes in everybody. There’s so much going on with this guy, this identity-case, this brute, this pacifist, this establishment-man, this rebel and idealist and weirdo and a dozen other conflicting things. He’s been and done just about everything with charm and style over the decades, and it works, because it all adds up into one nice guy’s unusual, well-rounded life. And because it’s always anchored by an understanding: for all that he’s a unique freak of creation, he knows that in all the madness and uncertainty and horror, the one thing we have to rely on is each other. So he’ll put on his suit and throw himself out there against the only things in the universe that could kill him when he could be doing anything else, because he’s found a home with us little people when he lost his, and he knows we’re worth the fight; everyone is, aliens just like him in their own ways, waiting to be saved the way they saved him when he landed in a field. That’s why Superman’s great.

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Bear Symbolism - Master Post

Good morning! So a few weeks ago, @wdway found a bunch of bear stuff to add to the Bear Symbolism Theory. Click on that link to go read the one I posted last season. I knew I wanted to post what she found, but as I read through everything, I knew I’d have to make a master post and include all the bear instances we’ve seen before. Here are all the instances we’ve noticed of the bear symbolism. (As always, if I’m missing any, feel free to let me know and I’ll add them. ;D)

1. 4x03 – When Carl and Hershel leave the prison to gather berries for Hershel’s tea to help the sick, they see a female walker with her leg in a bear trap.

Remember this is the same episode where we see the picture behind Hershel that says, “Smooth seas do not make good sailors.”

This is also important because TD-ers discovered years ago that there was supposed to be a Beth figurine sold with a bear trap accessory. The figurine was never sold that way, and I don’t think we know why, but it was considered as an idea and then scrapped.

(Creds to the original reporters of this. BGIHU, I believe. Unfortunately the account is locked and I cannot reference a URL to the original post.)

I also think it’s important to note that the small game trap Beth stepped on in Alone is very similar to a bear trap. It’s obviously much smaller, and didn’t do nearly as much damage, but the concept is the same, as though it may foreshadow something bigger in the future.

2. 5x03 - Gareth, talking to Bob at the school in 5x03, gives a speech about bears. He says, ““You know, bears…when they start to starve, they eat their young. If the bear dies, the cub dies anyway. But if the bear lives, it can always have another cub.”

It’s the Termites’ way of justifying cannibalism and ties the bear symbolism to Terminus. I can’t help but notice it’s also about children (the cub).

3. You could argue we saw some oblique bear symbolism in S4. Beth’s D.C. spoon could represent the Little Dipper, which is part of Ursa Minor (“the small bear”). And of course she steps in the small game trap in Alone.

4.  5x06 - We catch the barest glimpse of a bear in the domestic abuse shelter Daryl and Carol stay in. 

There is plenty of other interesting symbolism in this room, including a quote about apple trees, pink lamp shades, etc, We also see a stuffed animal tiger. The tiger foreshadows Shiva, and is therefore meant for Carol’s arc. She sleeps on the top bunk where the tiger lays. That would suggest, by default, that the brown bear is about Daryl.

5. 6x10 - Carl tells Judith about the North Star and using it to find one’s way home. (North star is part of the Great Bear constellation.) The Great Bear and Small Bear constellations also have ties to owls, the horse theory, and possibly the deer symbol.

6. Also in S6, the Skybound account posted a modified poster from the film, Revenant with Norman’s face on it. Not only is this film about a man left for dead who then survives and, after a long arduous journey returns to his family, but his “death” or near death was caused by a grizzly bear attack.

7. In season 7, we have the bear Rachel and Cyndie find at Oceanside. It’s been washed in on the tide (much like Tara) and survived a stormy sea. It washes in with the sunrise.

8. 7x12 - We see bears hanging at the carnival Richonne go to.

9.The picture on Judith’s wall. We all spent a lot of last season trying to figure out what it was. It kinda looks like a bear, kinda like a dog, kinda like a horse or pig. Well, any of those would work for our purposes, since they’ve all been used as symbols in the show. There is a breed of dog in Russia that’s often called a Dog Bear. That’s because its face looks like a bear cub but it has the body of a dog. It really is a breed of dog, though. Anyway, that’s what we’re guessing this picture is of. It would combine the bear symbolism with the recurring symbolism of Sirius, the dog star.

10.   Finally, @wdway noticed this in S8. Right before Michonne heads out in this scene, she gives Judith a kiss. 

There are other Beth symbols in this scene, but notice what Judith is playing with. It’s a bear with blond hair. She’s playing with a little Beth bear! (And sitting next to some water, I might add.)

11.   While this isn’t specifically seen in the show, we should also consider the Goldilocks and the Three Bears template. It’s a perfect rule of threes template, and then there are bears and a girl with blond hair. Just saying.

So what does all this mean? What’s up with the bear symbolism? Well, in short, I do believe the bear = Beth. But let’s do a little bit deeper analysis than that. @wdway pointed out that bears hibernate. They disappear, sleep for months at a time, and then wake up again. It really is a great symbol for Beth because of that, and might be the reason the writers chose it to begin with. I’ve even used the word “hibernation” a lot to describe Beth being shot and her vitals becoming unreadable.

The walker in 4×03 had a bear trap around its leg. AMC nearly put out a Beth figurine that included bear trap. That's pretty good proof that the walker in this scene represents Beth.

I've said many times that, where Carl is concerned, this scene foreshadows his death by walker bite. That's mostly because we see a Jim walker in the scene, and Jim in S1, also died from walker bite. So my biggest take away from this has always been that Beth (the walker with the bear trap on its leg) will show up only after Carl dies from the walker bite. That should be any episode now, and the bear symbolism, whatever it means, should show up with her.

Gareth talking about the bear ties bear symbolism to terminus. We’ve thought for a long time that Beth would end up at Terminus. There’s a lot of evidence she will: cop cars at Terminus (Grady symbol), signature items that TF carried left there (Daryl’s poncho, the riot gear), and Beth got a Terminus poster in 4B (why give her a poster if she was never going to end up there?) So this is yet more evidence that Beth will be tied to Terminus somehow. If the bear symbolism = Beth and the bear is tied to Terminus, then Beth must also be tied to Terminus.

I don’t have a whole lot more to say about the S4 symbolism, except that it's all tied together. The small game trap could foreshadow the bigger bear trap later on. The D.C. spoon obviously represents her finding her way to D.C. If she navigates by the stars, as Carl suggests, and the stars are part of a constellation called the greater or lesser bear, it suggests the bear symbolism will also have something to do with how she gets to D.C. I'll come back to that.

Consumed, was two episodes before Coda, where Beth was shot. So the bear might show that we’re about to see the beginning of the arc the bear is linked to. After all, Carol and Daryl were searching for Beth in this episode.

The Revenant poster may be the most interesting example. Let's go over the plot of the movie again. Hugh Glass is attacked by a bear and then left for dead. I know in the real life account (just search Wikipedia for Hugh Glass) his buddies left him before he died. He was hurt so badly, they assumed he'd be dead in a few hours, and were going to stay with him, hold his hand until he passed, and then bury him. But then they were attacked by enemies and had to run or die. Later, Glass woke up and dragged himself over 200 miles to get back to his camp.

If you think about it, this matches what we think happened with Beth. Glass’s friends were gonna wait for him to die and then bury him. TF thought Beth was dead. We believe they probably tried to bury her. We think they ran into a horde of walkers (enemies). They had to leave her and run or else they would've died too. So the parallels are very strong there.

If we look at the role the bear played in the film, it would seem the bear symbolism has something to do with why Beth was shot and subsequently left behind. The bear in the film is the thing that inflicted Glass’s wounds, which is what made everyone think he was dead. We still don’t know where the bullet came from, but it wasn't from Dawn's gun.

Another thing to consider about this poster is that Daryl, not Beth, is on it. That could be because Beth was already supposedly dead in S6 and putting her on a poster about things coming back from the dead would be way too obvious. There's a few ways we can look at this.

1)    Daryl represents Beth. Because they couldn't put her on the poster, they put him on it. It might represent Beth, or both of them, since the arcs are so entwined.

2)    Daryl represents himself. While Beth seems to have died physically, Daryl died emotionally. I remember this poster came out right around 6x06. It was part of the reason we thought maybe Beth would return in 6x06. (I did a whole post about it.)

In my group, we’ve discussed that the reason 6x06 is so full Beth symbolism is it's the episode where Daryl completely lost the faith Beth instilled in him. Daryl did die emotionally when he lost her in S5, but we saw him recruiting with Aaron in 5B and trying to convince Rick that they still needed to look for good people in 6x01. He was trying to honor her and live the truth that she taught him. 

In 6x06, while he was trying to help “good people,” Sherry and Dwight screwed him over. It was the final straw that made him let go of what Beth taught him.That would explain a lot of the symbolism in the episode, including the Cherokee Rose. So this poster may have been to show that this was the final nail in Daryl's emotional coffin, but eventually he would return from that emotional death. Well, as of S8, we haven’t seen him return from it. If this is what they were going for, it has yet to happen.

Next, we have the bear in 7x06 with Cyndie and Rachel. This is one of the main reasons I believe the bear = Beth. It was washed in from the ocean and given all the water symbolism around Beth, it’s pretty compelling. I think Tara was 100% a proxy and foreshadow Beth and this episode, and she was washed on the tide. This could be literal (Beth will wash in with the tide as Tara did) or more symbolic. She will come in with the tide (symbolically Oceanside) right at dawn (the beginning of the new arc).

Cyndie suggests they use Sage and Lavender on the bear to improve its condition. @wdway points out those things are used for spiritual healing and have antiseptic, preservative properties.

Then there are the bears in 7x12 with Richonne. The biggest Beth symbolism in this episode is Rick’s death fake out. It looked like the walkers got him, but he escaped. There was yellow involved. There is also a deer in this episode. The deer died, so Rick lived. Given the dead deer we saw in 5x10, that's obviously a Beth thing. So the interesting thing about these carnival bears is:

1. On the foot of this one we see two entwined hearts. I totally think that could represent Richonne, as this episode was totally about two people becoming one (there was plenty of talk about their symbolic marriage in this episode). But I also think that it represents all the soul mate relationships on the show, including Bethyl.

2. The bears are shown right before the death fake out scene. Like, we literally see Richonne running toward the Ferris wheel and past these bears, and in the NEXT scene, Rick’s death fake out happens. So these two things (bears and death fake outs) are definitely related.

And how about Judith? The fact that we have her playing with the bear and there's been a lot of child symbolism around Beth, and she sitting next to water are all very interesting. These are all symbols we seen a lot. @wdway even pointed out there's a tunnel with a water outlet right next to her (Tunnel symbolism).

So what's my wacky theory? It’s more like a series of wacky thoughts. If the bear symbolism represents something that has to do with why Beth was left behind, and it has ties to Terminus, and maybe something about Terminus and its ties to Grady have to do with how Beth got shot.

Gareth talking about a bear and its cub was especially intriguing to me. A cub is the offspring of the bear, so we have child symbolism in that and there's been a lot of child and baby symbolism around Beth. Many people have theorized since S6 that perhaps at some point Judith will be in trouble and Beth will have to save her. As time goes on, especially this season, we’ve wondered if it won’t be Judith, but rather Gracie.

Either way, Gareth’s story justified the parent eating a child to stay alive, because the parent can always have another child. So I'm wondering if Beth will be at Terminus and will end up saving a child that maybe they were going to eat? Could that be Gracie? I don't know.

All the star and constellation stuff suggests that something about the bear symbolism will help Beth get to D.C. I said before that I think she's arriving with the Wolves. I've also said the Wolves could be the people who take down Grady. Remember Gimple also confirmed that Crazy Tattoo Guy (one of the people who took over Terminus) would be tied to a bigger group of bad guys. That could be the Saviors, but it could also be the Wolves. I could put this together one of fifty ways, but it’s all conjecture until we know more.

What it comes down to is that Beth, Terminus, possibly the Wolves, and the bear symbolism all part of one circle of events. These events stretch back to S5. Because of the Sasha/Tyreese theory, I think whatever Sasha and Gabriel were talking about in 5x16, goes back not just back to Coda and the missing 17 days, but probably back to Terminus. I think there were a lot of things we didn't see in S5.

Bottom line: Whatever the bear symbolism represents, it should be arriving with Beth any episode now. I’m excited to see how it all pans out and I’ll be on the look for more bear symbolism as we go along.

P.S. Minor Spoilers: In episode 8x11, Dr. Carson supposedly gets caught in a bear trap. Hmmm.

Can anyone think of any bear symbolism I missed?

[djsandok]

Heavy Hip Hop Set Reflection

Last night was special because it put my journey as a DJ in perspective. 

(March 13, 2020 - Mesa - My Birthday Weekend / The Last Weekend Before Quarantine)

It’s been a standard question to answer as of late: “How have you been dealing with the quarantine?”

I usually refer to THE QUARANTINE SERIES keeping me busy while explaining that I’m an extrovert that thrives off other people.  This is true with teaching, art, and especially DJ’ing.

I came into last night thinking it was going to be a casual R&B listening session with some old and new friends---I was even wearing my favorite R. Kelly shirt.  Little did I know I’d be playing for the generation that helped me fall in love with hip hop and DJ’ing.

--

I started DJ’ing after a road trip with my family to visit some extended family in San Jose.  I was around 12 or 13 at the time I think.  They weren’t professional DJs but knew the basics of DJ’ing.  I was surprised at how simple the concept of transitioning from one song to the next was.

I saved money and bought my equipment.  Then came my vinyl collection.  Then came the hundreds of CD-Rs I needed to make to play the newer stuff and/or rare stuff.

I didn’t know it then but I know it now.  I was part of the last generation of DJs that were hired because of the record library they had.  To put it in perspective, anyone can be a DJ with a limitless library of MP3s now.  You specifically hired a DJ because you trusted his/her limitations in music.  

It was an absolute honor to build a clientele strictly from referrals.  To this day, I don’t really like to DJ for strangers unless they’ve heard me perform somewhere.  

--

(Bryan Black tattooing my leg in 2012)

It reminds me of a conversation I’ve had multiple times with my friend, Bryan Black.  A tattoo should be a collaboration between the tattoo artist and the client.  A client shouldn’t be forcing their vision of the tattoo while disregarding the artist’s advice.  I feel the same exact way with my DJ clients.

All Bryan and I want for our clients are for them to trust us.  

That trust is usually rewarded with something special, memorable, and most importantly, organic.  

--

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by ej (@sandok_) on Apr 27, 2018 at 3:22pm PDT

(Skratching to Leon Bridges in my classroom in 2018)

I’ve been thinking about how I define myself as a DJ in 2020.  Yes, by default, I’m a Hip Hop DJ.  

However, I’m not really sure where Hip Hop stands today.  I think the “good” Hip Hop sampling era died somewhere along where Kanye’s music started getting overtly self-centered and simply not good.

With the music industry changing drastically because of the internet, it’s probably really easy to find a talented rapper.  Hell, I’m friends with some of the best emcees I’ve ever heard.

But what next?  How do you market them to people on the internet?  How do they make a career out of it?  How do you connect them to producers so they can reach their potential?

That’s why I think the next stage of Hip Hop is centered around artists like Bryson Tiller, SiR, and Frank Ocean.  

Simply put: you have to be able to showcase some musicality that isn’t necessarily based on rhymes and sampling.

--

(Toby, my munchkin cat, posing in front of some the most talented female R&B artists of the century)

Which brings me back to why last night was so special.  I’ve been so stuck on the above mentality for a very long time knowing I’ve been bored of new Hip Hop for a while.

Nevertheless, I get really excited about really good R&B.  And the 21st-Century has definitely been providing.  SZA, H.E.R., Jorja Smith, Lana Del Rey, Snoh Aalegra, Summer Walker, and Jhene Aiko to name a few.

I’d like to think I’m good at spinning that stuff because there’s an intimate feeling with their music that I’d like to share with the listener.

Nevertheless, where does that leave me in 2020 as a “Hip Hop DJ?”  Especially since I tried my hardest to have my roots grounded in the culture.  I learned how to DJ breaks from Dwenz and the Foundation FunKollective, an incredibly influential figure and organization in the Los Angeles Hip Hop community.  Did I abandon hip hop in the 2010/2020s?

Hell nah.

--

My first DJ mentor, DJ Redline, dropped in the set around 8:30 PM.  My sister had some classes with him at CSUF and he took me record shopping when I was in 7th/8th grade.  He let me in on all the DJ secrets with buying records, mixing, skratching, etc.  He even gave me a BUNCH of records which gave me a sense of pride knowing during those times DJs are what their records are.  I didn’t have anything.

Anyway, I decided to drop a LA Symphony track knowing we’re both big fans of them.  

Damn.  That was the catalyst that brought out a BUNCH of memories.

That was one of my favorite 12″ vinyl that I loved showing off back in the day.

I definitely feel spoiled that I have the MP3 and can play it whenever I want.

But, I don’t play it.  At all.

lordnik0n_ was the first to be stoked about the LA Symphony drop.

I later found out he’s the father of a former student.

That student used to tell me his family listens to my recorded mixtapes all the time.

Little did I know that he’s been tuning in to my quarantine series.

The night progressed into a HEAVY esoteric hip hop set that probably lordnik0n_, Redline, and I knew.  

Peep the set here.  It starts around 1:43:00

As a DJ, your job is to play for your crowd, my crowd was two people last night even though there were more watching.

I never get to play any of this stuff.  It was important to me to get a recording of it so I could listen to it later.

--

Last night was special because it brought my journey as a DJ full circle.

I grew up knowing there are really talented Filipino DJs before actually learning the fundamentals.

I learned the fundamentals through imitating radio station DJs (Icy Ice, Melo-D, E-Man, etc.) and other DJ Crews (Invisbl Skratch Piklz, The Beat Junkies, The 5th Platoon, etc.)

I immersed myself in Hip Hop culture by participating in B-Boy events as a DJ and building a record collection.

I built a clientele that trusted my taste in Hip Hop, R&B, Funk, Soul, Rock, etc.

I heavily incorporate my love and appreciation of music and culture into my English Language Arts classroom.

I was welcomed as a resident DJ at Mesa which started a shift in the music they were providing for their guests

--

It’s really hard to describe last night because I was thinking about all those bullet points simultaneously and reflecting where we are during this weird-ass quarantine lockdown.

But something really special happened when I was playing MP3s that I have as vinyl.  All those memories of when I was young, naive, and wide-eyed about the world came flooding back to me.  

All those memories came back and I was able to organically rock a hip hop set as if it were 2004 all over again.

All those memories made me realize that I haven’t really changed much.  My shift in music taste doesn’t necessarily mean I’m abandoning my Hip Hop roots.  It shows that I’m still hungry and wide-eyed about the world and want music to continue to give me the happiness it’s always provided me.

--

(Rampage, High School Sandōk, Sunnynblue circa 2005)

I wish I had more pictures of when I first started DJ’ing.  I think I was insecure because I didn’t want the label of “Bedroom DJ” because I wanted to be something much more.

Kind of ironic now that I’m DJ’ing in my living room for y’all.  HAHAH

--

A huge thank you to everyone that has been influential in my life.  That includes my clients, friends, family, and random people that enjoy my music at a bar/club/twitch stream.

holla.

[newidaho]

10.  Christmas Eve Mass

Don’t have the time/patience/desire to read with your eyes? Don’t have eyes? Well, have your friend read you this:  You can check out the audiobook for free on Apple, Google, Stitcher, or Spotify.  Subscribe for new episodes every Wednesday!

24 December 2054   ///   1900h.

Fredrick Garland paced back and forth across his room on the second floor of his Southwestern Mountain house.  His room was a sanctuary for him.  Not only had it been blessed by himself and by any rare visit by a fellow FuTech priest, it was also beautifully furnished.  The floors and walls were all made from dark walnut.  A Cherrywood desk was pushed against the eastern side of the wall, with a matching straight-backed chair pushed into it.  Above the desk, 2 sections of the wooden wall were closed over a window that looked out onto the farmlands to the east and the City further north.

It was important now that the windows remained covered.  Frederick could think better in an enclosed space—the view outside, though magnificent, was too distracting.  He paced across the floor of his room, going over his lines for the night.  It was the start of the most intense 24 hours of the year for any Christian Church—Christmas.

FuTech Christian Churches, est. 2032 in Burbank, California, was, like most emerging religions, a new take on an old story.  Reverend Jasper Wades and Christopher Englewood were both raised in non-denominational households in Northern California.  When they saw the world moving in a more virtual direction, they decided to scan through the Bible to see whether there was a call to make a denomination of their own.

What they found, and subsequently spread to their congregation, was that there was no passage that appeared to absolutely declare the Kingdom of God a physical kingdom.  In fact, the whole concept seemed spiritual.  They felt that the Virtual Revolution was a perfect opportunity to bring people together in Christ.

Thus was born FuTech Christian Churches—a community of virtual congregations that preached the importance of Virtual Reality as a tool to Empower Humanity.  There was even talk among some sects of a “Virtual Savior,” the possibility that the second coming may, in fact, appear in the virtual realm.  This belief was slowly becoming more prevalent throughout FuTech, where beliefs were not decided by a central authority, but constantly debated by different congregations all across the nation.  The idea was that Man was made in God’s Image, and the next iteration of man would be virtual—thus, the new savior would appear in this new realm—the realm made by and for the minds of man, the realm that no other animal could enter.  Most FuTech congregants agreed that whether or not the second coming would appear there, this Virtual World was where the Kingdom of Heaven would finally be built.

Being a virtual church, anyone could join any congregation of FuTech.  Out of respect to the traditional value of a physical community, however, many still opted to join their local congregation.  If they chose to migrate, it was customary, though not required, to increase their donation to the church.

As the Head Preacher for FuTech of New Idaho, Papa Garland (as he was known to the congregation), was under more pressure than many priests of other congregations.  Whereas most other congregations were relatively small, FuTech of New Idaho often had a great amount of visitors, curious as to what service would look like in the City of the Century.  The pressure was even greater on Christmas day, even though FuTech had a notably consistent turnout compared to many other churches.

Normally, Papa G could deal with the pressure.  Never once was he not nervous, but he considered nerves to be an important sign that you cared.  Today, however, he was much more distracted than usual.

It all started with a simple question asked by his daughter at dinner two hours earlier.  Gamma was the only daughter he and his wife had planned to have, and she was a beautiful girl.  Gamma was smart, creative, and obedient—the best daughter a couple could have hoped for.  As she neared the end of her 13th year, however, Frederick was catching hints of a shift toward adulthood that, though necessary, was already proving to be a difficult passage.

The question was:  ‘Papa, can I sit with my friend Charlie at Christmas mass?’

A boy.  No matter how much they tried to keep their Gamma from exposure to the physical world, keeping her in the FuTech Virtual Home School, keeping her busy outside, teaching her to appreciate the world that God had given his people, she was still being exposed to the male energy that could easily bring ruin to their family.

Noticing the lack of a prompt answer, Gamma had continued:  ‘He’s very nice, and a true disciple of Jesus.  He’s one of the truest Christians I know.’

‘And how do you know him?’ Frederick had asked in return.

‘He’s a classmate of mine at the VHS.’

Of course.  How else?  ‘Don’t you only have a brief period of time before you disconnect from the server?  When do you have the time to talk to him?’

At this point, Gamma had looked down at her plate.  She knew that she was expected to use that time to talk with the teacher.  ‘That’s the time I use, father.’

Frederick then straightened up, deciding whether to use this confession for a punishment, or a passive guilt-laden suggestion that she not see this boy again.  ‘This Charlie is keeping you from your studies, it would appear.’

‘No, father, I still get straight As!  You’ve seen my grades.’

She had a point.  He switched tact.  ‘And you would spend Christmas Mass away from your family?’

‘You’ll be preaching, father.’

‘And your mother?’

‘She can sit with me!  And it’s only for one of the masses.  Charlie doesn’t have a big family, and I don’t get to talk with him much, so I think it would be good for everyone.’

‘Good for everyone.  Yes, I’m sure your mother would love to have your attention split between the lord, her, and now this new boy.’

Gamma’s mother kept silent, her head down.

‘I don’t see any reason why you need to talk with him further,’ her father continued.  ‘Don’t you have all the love you need right here?  Or perhaps you have not felt the love of the Lord with enough fervor—perhaps that is what is leading you astray.’

‘I’m not being led astray,’ Gamma muttered into her plate.

Her father’s eyes narrowed.  ‘Gamma.  Are you daring to tell me that you have not been led astray when I can see it through my very eyes?  Are you questioning the spirit of the Lord?  Well, if your decline has not from this been made obvious, I can only expect that the devil has blinded you more than I initially thought.’

At that point, Gamma had gotten up from her plate and walked up to her room without a word.  Frederick had decided not to follow her, instead finishing up his meal and going up to his sanctuary to prepare for the 2000h Christmas Eve Mass.

In his room, he continued to pace back and forth, but he couldn’t get this episode out of his mind.  He slowed himself down and took a few breaths.  He called on the Lord to give him strength.  When he felt the energy of the Holy Spirit enter him, he resumed his practice and finished running through his sermon one last time.

He exited his sanctuary and knocked on Gamma’s door.  ‘Time to gather in the prayer room,’ he said.  ‘Bring your mask.’

The prayer room was located on the first floor on the Northeastern corner of the house.  The walls were tall and circular, extending from the landing floor to the roof.  The bottom half was surrounded by glass windows that looked out over the valley.  The top half was stained glass.

By the time Gamma arrived in the room with her mask, her father already had his on.  He was ready to begin the service.

As a Virtual Church, FuTech services can look very different to everyone who enters.  Different Worship Packs are offered for purchase, where congregants could find themselves giving praise on a beautiful beach, or an old cathedral.  Otherwise, they were kept to the FuTech default setting, which, though modest, was by no means unpleasant.

In services that contained more than 200 congregants, however, a more modest monthly fee provided a choice of lobby view in addition to stadium view.  Many in the New Idaho congregation took this option, as most of its services contained anywhere from 1000-1500 congregants.  Paying for the lobby view allowed the attendee the choice of enjoying mass in a small room of 50, making the whole experience a lot more homey.  Small communities would eventually form within lobbies, further resembling the function of Christian churches throughout history.

As a preacher, it was important that Fredrick always took the stadium view.  He liked to see the faces of everyone who was joining him.  It actually put him in a calmer state.  Knowing that so many depended on him for their spiritual nourishment inspired him to give them just that.

For now, however, he waited in the ‘backstage area’ as New Idaho’s FuTech band played through everyone’s Christmas favorites.  He went over the bullets of his sermon once more.  Eventually, the music died down and he waved his hand over the Stage Icon in front of him to appear on the main stage.  He looked up into the bleachers at no less than 1000 happy faces.  There would be even more tomorrow, he reminded himself.

Papa Frederick smiled as he enjoyed the cheers of the audience.  He folded his hands in front of him and patiently waited for the noise to die down.  He chanced a look stage left—there they were.  His wife and daughter.  He caught himself trying to glance at his daughter’s face to see if she was upset before he realized it may disrupt the flow of his service.

‘Good evening, everybody!’  Frederick said.  ‘I’m so happy to see you all here on Christmas Eve, gathered to worship together.  You know, Christmas is one of those times for reflection.  There’s a lot of those this season.  The New Year causes us to reflect on the year that has gone past.  Thanksgiving prompts us to reflect on what we are grateful for.  And Christmas, like any holiday, makes us think—what have we done since last Christmas?  How have we served God since the holiday?

‘Before I go on, I would like to mention that New Idaho’s FuTech community has done quite a lot.  Our congregation has grown 25%.’  He paused for cheers from the audience.  ‘Together, you all have traded over $1 million to the church.’  More applause.  ‘And we have used that money to further improve the experience for everyone.  We are truly beginning to build the Kingdom of God, together, as one Virtual Community.  And I don’t know about you, but that feels more real to me than anything else.’  More modest clapping from the audience.

‘Now, you’ve all heard the Christmas story many, many times.  It has been repeated throughout history.  It has become an American fixture.  If you don’t believe me, just look how many non-Christians are setting out cookies for Santa, hoping for presents to reward them on a holiday developed from the birth of our Lord and Savior.

‘Now, I don’t begrudge these atheists and agnostics.  Far be it from me to judge them—their judgement, we know, will come.  But it is important for us here, now, to remember together what Christmas means.  Christmas was the birth of our savior.

‘Now, I know that many of us here believe there is a new savior to come—a Virtual Savior.  And I ought not lie, our scholars have found compelling evidence that this is so.  And if it is, well, then, the dreams of our children today just may come true—two Christmases!’  Laughter from the audience.  ‘But until that time, it is important to remember our family.’

He glanced down to his left.  His words were left hanging in the air.  His first reaction was to do the unthinkable and stop the service by removing his mask.  

To his left, his wife sat in her usual seat, but Gamma, his daughter, had left.

[game-refraction]

Game Review: Resident Evil 7 - Biohazard (PS VR)

  I opened the door to the cellar and descended down the stairs. Even before my first foot was placed firmly on the wooden plank below I could hear a heavy erratic breathing and creaking of stairs below me. Soon after hearing those disturbing noises, all while surrounded in pitch black darkness, small white arms appeared, attached to a small thin body that crawled up the stairs towards me. She lunged up at me and laughed as she picked me up and threw me back up through the door frame. I got to my feet to attempt to get away, but she charged at me, knife in hand, and starting slashing away at me, grinning the whole time.

Resident Evil 7: Biohazard brings its survival horror via a first person perspective. While this isn’t the first time the franchise has had this viewpoint, it is a new concept to the main numbered series. This perspective brings with it a new way to explore a Resident Evil game while also allowing it to return to its roots and lean far more on fear than straight-out action. Resident Evil 7 is nearly a masterpiece and a solid return to form.

As different as one would think a first person Resident Evil game would play, there is so much here that echoes that of the original 1996 PlayStation release. You still have a protagonist armed with various forms of firepower, themed keys, complex puzzles, herb based medical supplies and a maze-like home that continues to give even when you think you’ve explored each and every corner.

The Resident Evil games have commercially and critically gone downhill since the 5th in the series, with its 6th entry being the worst received of the entire franchise. Resident Evil 4 had been one of the best-reviewed games in the series and a turning point for 3rd person shooters altogether. The balance of horror and action was sublime and many thought this was, in fact, a sign that the future of Resident Evil games were going to succeed, and boy were they wrong. The series then left a lot of its survival roots behind and focused more on the shooting aspects altogether thus turning the series into action horror than one of survival.

Back at E3 in 2015 there was a tech demo from Capcom called “Kitchen” and it was for the upcoming VR headset that would eventually be called PlayStation VR. This demo was then later on revealed to be a glimpse at what the future of what Resident Evil was going to be. It was clear then that Resident Evil was going to follow in the footsteps of several recent horror games and be presented as a first person game. Throughout my playthrough of RE7, I couldn’t help but see so many horror influences here, from movies and games like Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Outlast, P.T. and even Alien: Isolation. It also should be noted that many horror games throughout the years have borrowed from the original Resident Evil released back in 1996, so maybe we have just come full circle in who inspired who.

The basic structure of the story here is equally reminiscent to that of mid-2000 horror movies, with a few of those references I can’t mention due to ruining the core story, let alone the whole reason for the freaky things that go on here. You play as Ethan, a man who learns his dead wife Mia isn’t quite so dead and goes to Louisiana to track her down. You end up at the homestead of the Baker’s, a family that seems lifted right out from Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

Almost the entirety of RE7 takes place at or around the Baker homestead, a location that has just as much creativity and mystery as the Spencer Estate did back in the original Resident Evil. There are themed keys and secret areas that unlock through your natural progression in the story, with a few locations that need some backtracking to locate or unlock once you’ve discovered a special key or lockpick. This location is the gift that just keeps on giving and it is these small intimate locations that trump the atmosphere you get in any open world game. The level design in RE7 is just superb and constantly had me paranoid around every corner, even when I knew the danger had passed.

Where the original Resident Evil had many things to kill, this is where RE7 sadly stumbles; enemy variety. You only have a small handful of enemy types and they can become more frustration than excitement. While I’ll get to my opinion on VR and non-VR later on, because there is a huge divide on quality there, the monsters tend to be more bullet sponges than anything else. You have what are called the “Molded” and these tar-like monsters come in upright on two legs or ones that tend to stay on all fours. These encounters on harder difficulty can be nightmarish and with the aiming system what it is, you’ll spend a ton of bullets taking them down or attempting to. There are also some large flying bugs later on that pretty much are limited to a few encounters and are not found in high numbers outside of those moments. Other than that, you have your boss encounters; Jack, Marguerite, Lucas and two more encounters I’ll not reveal. I’ve also seen a few encounters happen differently than that of my own, adding a bit of unpredictability to each playthrough, and creating a greater sense of paranoia when you don’t know what is going to happen.

Several encounters with the Baker family take place in VHS tapes that you’ll find and view during the roughly ten hour playthrough. These tapes are essentially playable scenes where you embody another character and see events that happened before you entered the Baker home. These tapes almost act as a time machine as you can effect things in the past to help Ethan in the present. One of those effects is unlocking a locked drawer early on by finding the lockpick at your feet at the start of the first VHS tape. Unlocking this drawer as Clancy will allow Ethan to benefit from what is in the drawer. There are a small handful of these tapes and each of them are vastly entertaining with one resembling something straight out of a saw movie.

The Baker family is easily the true highlight of the game as each member of this family is sick, twisted and just pure fun. The problem with a lot of the gaming industry is its lack of inclusion of genuine silliness in games. When the original Resident Evil came about, it featured awful voice acting, absurd situations and a campiness to it that garnered it a cult status. With lines like “That was too close. You were almost a Jill sandwich!” or “Jill, here’s a lockpick. It might come in handy if you, ‘the master of unlocking’, take it with you.” Both of which are famously remembered when discussing any cheesy dialogue from video games history and is right up there with “All your base are belong to us.”

Games like Outlast had you escape encounters instead of embracing them, putting the “survival” in survival horror. Resident Evil allows the use of powerful weaponry, so there is no need to stuff yourself into a locker and hope that whatever is chasing you didn’t notice you pop in there. While there are moments in RE7 that require you to hide, it is usually behind some sort of box, table or pile of debris. Bringing the heat to the Molded and said bosses, Ethan has access to various handguns, shotguns, a knife, grenade launcher, flamethrower, and more. Depending on the difficulty you’ve chosen you’ll find ammo littered around to use sparingly or just go Rambo on anything that moves.

There are some issues with regards to combat that can hurt the overall enjoyment. Some of the encounters when you are trying to escape can be a pain when you are boxed in, as there is no shove or dodge mechanic at all, forcing you to expend ammo when you really wanted to conserve it. Speaking of ammo, let’s discuss the best way to play Resident Evil 7; VR.

My first and full playthrough of RE7 was entirely in VR, from start to finish. After completing the game I booted it up in 4K on my PS4 Pro and started up a new game. Once I had to shoot down my first enemy, I suddenly realized that RE7 in non-VR just wasn’t nearly as good. Well, that’s not true, I realized that well before I had my first gun. The way the VR allows you to see your entire peripheral vision is unmatched as is the way it allows you to aim. In VR you only have to move your head small amounts to get that much-needed headshot and the cursor for doing so is far more apparent. Without VR I was struggling to get a solid shot and it was frustrating.

The way VR enhances Resident Evil 7 is incredible, and not once did I get sick or too dizzy to keep playing. Sure, I had a moment or two where I had to slow down and pause the game for a second, but eventually, I went three to four hours of straight play without becoming light-headed or nauseous. There are vast amounts of settings to enhance or assist in how VR works for you. RE7 does the same thing another VR game I’ve seen do, and that is fading in and out each time you move the right stick, this assists in turning so that the fluid movement doesn’t make you sick. It takes a while to get used to and turning it off resulted in getting dizzy real fast, so I recommend to stick with the default setting. There are several moments in the game that are not in VR and it pans out to a theater style view. These are moments when the camera must be directly focused on something and needs to prevent you from looking around. There are also several moments when you are knocked down or jump down to a lower location that results in a quick fade in and out.

Despite any issues with VR, I enjoyed the game far more with the added perspective and immersion that VR brings. Locations gave me a sense of claustrophobia that I didn’t feel when not wearing the headset. Locations and people felt far more real and made me truly appreciate this game for what they intended to do. When a character grabs your hand, you feel far more connected to them as opposed to just seeing it happen on screen. There are also several moments in the game where it gets right in your face, a design that is obviously crafted for VR in mind. About the only thing that VR doesn’t have that non-VR does is a full body given to Ethan, as well as shadows that accompany said body; VR has floating arms and no shadow given to Ethan.

Health is another issue that is problematic with VR and non-VR as it can be a visual nuisance on both, but a far bigger one in non-VR. Ethan has a pebble watch attached to his wrist, not joking, and it shows your health as you take hits and cuts from various foes. In VR this is a circle effect around you, growing more red the closer you are to death. in non-VR you have blood effects on the screen and should you even be at 90% health, there will be blood effects on the screen, annoying you. Ethan already has a watch to show his health, these effects could have been completely left out and had us rely on the watch until giving us some visual warning for extremely low health.

Visuals will vary depending on how you play Resident Evil 7. The Xbox One and PS4 versions are virtually identical, whereas the PS4 Pro’s 4K mode and PC versions are easily the best in terms of visuals. The VR approach on the PS4 is far less impressive due to the resolution restraints the headset has, but rest assured this is the best way to play this game – bar none. The locations are packed with detail, dirty and filthy and just impressive. Sinks are filled with dirty plates, cockroaches and various bits of food, equally detailed with hundreds of maggots. RE7 is an aesthetically pleasing game on all fronts.

After playing through the entire game in VR and a solid portion without, Resident Evil 7 is superb regardless of platform. I will state that my 4.5/5 rating of the game is for its VR offerings and my experience with RE7 not in VR rates a solid 3.5/5. The game is just vastly better in VR in terms of difficulty, immersion, and function. Playing Resident Evil 7 in VR was thrilling, terrifying, and made me paranoid with each step. There are so many settings to make sure that your VR experience is an enjoyable one, it makes me wish that games like Robinson Journey, a game made solely for VR, would offer as many settings there to allow me to enjoy it without feeling ill. While my experience with it not in VR may be the result of a ‘been there done that’ approach to a second playthrough, I didn’t feel nearly as scared or immersed in my surroundings, because well, these locations were not really around me and neither were the threats looking to soak up my bullets. If you have been on the fence about purchasing a Playstation VR, well, this is that killer app that makes the purchase, albeit an expensive one, worth it.

Resident Evil 7 is a solid return to form for the Resident Evil series, a horror game that while not terribly original has us all excited about taking another trip to this once wonderful franchise, and that, regardless of any platform, is a very good thing indeed.

To get a taste of what Resident Evil 7 offers, check out the following trailer. As is the case with all the launch trailers surrounding this game, it does contain a lot of scenes from later on in the game, so huge caution for spoilers and story elements I’ve kept quiet on in this review, you have been warned.

  Game Review: Resident Evil 7 – Biohazard (PS VR) was originally published on Game-Refraction