#i have two (2) friends who are considering watching spn because of jensen's character

[soultheories]

jensen's character in the boys is going to bring a whole new generation of dean winchester stannies and that makes me ill

[laora-inn]

Supernatural - Some speculations about the last 7 episodes of 15th season

Well, after 2 trailers, episodes descriptions on IMDB and some unfinished plot-lines of SPN story I’d like to share my own speculations. Some of them are definitely wrong. 

Destiel positive, happy end positive, don’t like - don’t read. 

Season 15 | Episode 14. Last Holiday

A filler - that’s how we anime fans call episodes which have no deal with the main plotline, though can contain some interesting moments and nuances. In “Supernatural” these episodes usually have no Cas in them. Sometimes they are very good... but mostly not. They are “just for fun”, and fans enjoy them, because they can be really funny. No angst.

Like this one - no angst, no Cas, a wood nymph who looks like Mary Poppins to me (or Mrs. Marple whatever). Some British origin of the character. 

That’s the episode which shots with Dean in purple nightgown are from (trailer short version).

I suppose the shot with Dean, Sam and Jack flying in the air could also be here from. But maybe not.

I don’t know where Cas may be. His absence should be explained to us in some way. In episode 10th he was missing because of talking to the angels. What’s now? Some preparations for the next Jack's trial? 

In this episode Dean should come closer to Jack’s forgiving.

Season 15 | Episode 15. Gimme Shelter

I have NO IDEA what this episode is about. Maybe the next trial for Jack? Or not?

I think the shot from the last trailer with Cas protecting Jack on the truck bed is from this episode. Also, some tortured person on the bed with the “lust” written above could be from it. 

And what about Sam and Dean? Where are they? 

I think they may have their own journey here, separate from Cas and Jack. Possibly the epic shots with them entering some building are this episode from. Possibly not. 

Season 15 | Episode 16. Drag Me Away (From You)

I don’t like this episode title. It looks like Destiel mocking to me - maybe, I just don’t have enough faith. I want to trust SPN writers but can’t. Somebody help me to believe, we all need that now! :)

THE ONLY episode in ALL THE SHOW except this one that had brackets in the title was 12x12, Stuck in the Middle (With You). Yahoo. 

Obviously, 12x12 was a parody to the Reservoir Dogs, a movie by Quentin Tarantino. Parody in a good sense of this word, but still. The plotline, the scenes (oh, this lunch scene from different points of view!), the scenes’ order, the roles, though changed - all of them. In case you didn’t watch Reservoir Dogs, just go and watch it, and then re-watch 12x12. You will understand. 

"Stuck in the Middle with You" is Stealers Wheel song which was in the OST of this Tarantino’s movie. This allusion should deal with boys’ and Mary relationship - because it’s her who betrayed them involuntarily, and now they are stuck in the middle with her. 

But somehow this episode title also deals with Destiel relationship. Maybe ‘cause that’s Cas who is dying, not Mary. Maybe ‘cause even on his deathbed he doesn’t confess something important - not about his betrayal, there was no one, but about his feelings. He says "I love you”, but then adds “I love all of you”, and Dean is literally stuck in the middle with Cas here. 

Back to the brackets in the episodes titles. Because of them I suppose that 12x12 and 15x16 could be connected. But how exactly?! That’s the question. I want them badly to be connected in Destiel way, but know too little. 

Back then I supposed that Dean could be dying in this episode and it would be his turn to confess something to Cas. But now I don’t know if there will be Cas in this episode at all, I just don’t have enough information. 

I hope he will. 

Btw, the words “Drag Me Away (From You)” are in Toto’s song “Africa”. And in case you didn’t know, in 2018 this song was used for half-an-hour Destiel video made by fan here. It covers ALL the Destiel moments then far. Link for this video is in Supernatural wiki, in the Destiel article. Half an hour, 10 repeats of the song, author’s comment: 

Along the way it stopped being funny and started getting insulting because this has been a literal decade (as of 2018 the vid features seasons 4-13) and the show has explored ALL of the tropes and yet and yet and yet...

I mean the fangirl shipper part of me also loves it. And then I get mad because I love it. I have a very complicated relationship with Supernatural but that's okay.

Have you heard the good news about Tragic Widow Dean?

TLDR: Have a supercut of all the DeanCas stuff set to Toto's Africa.

We can speculate a bit about this fact, but the truth is we know only about young Sam and Dean, who certainly will be in this episode. 

I think shots with Billie talking to Dean from the last trailer also belong to this episode, as well as shots with young Dean with Samulet, who is a ghost now. But these assumptions could be totally wrong. 

What circumstances will take us to the young Sam and Dean? Time travelling? Flashbacks? The parallel world?

Personally I think it will be the third option. Because how the hell young Dean can be a ghost in “our” universe? Unless it’s not Dean, though I doubt it. But if it’s not Dean, it can be a flashback, you know, with the young boys. Yep? 

We’ll wait and see.

I don’t think that Sam’s appreciative words to Dean refer to this episode. 

Also I don’t think Sam is going to sacrifice himself AGAIN (I’ve heard such an opinion). But maybe it’s my hope that makes me think in a wrong way.

Season 15 | Episode 17. Unity

I think some of Chuck’s shots are from this episode. Maybe the red lights in the bunker too. Maybe not. 

There also should be Amara and some angels. I saw Uriel in the cast! Maybe there also be some light lit on the all situation in Heaven now, when Jack made new angels. 

Some interaction between all of them + Sam, Dean, Cas and Jack should take place. Here the shot with sigil could be taken from. 

What side the angels will take? How it happened that Uriel is alive? Was he resurrected by Chuck or Amara? What plans does Amara have, how is she planning to deal with Chuck?

And what’s for Naomi? Will she come back or not? I think she won’t, not in this episode for sure, and I’m already disappointed ‘cause you know, she should be alive. Dumah said she is. For me Naomi is an important figure considering Destiel, and I think she’d be the best Heaven runner. 

All in all, in this episode should happen something that will make Cas happy. I suppose by the end of 15x17 or in the beginning of 15x18 they all will be sure that they have won the game, and Dean will forgive Jack for Mary.

The episode title may refer to angels’, Winchesters’ and Amara unity. 

Season 15 | Episode 18. Despair

Well, in Supernatural wiki I also saw “The Truth” title for this episode. 

Most of us are convinced that in this episode Cas will tell Dean about his deal with the Empty and will be taken by it. I believe the same. 

I think shot with Billie knocking with her hand rotten belongs to this episode. 

I have some doubts, but also think a shot with Dean leaning on Cas is from here. 

I’m sure that “You fought for this whole world” and Dean’s crying scene belong to this episode. ‘Cause you know. Despair. And the truth - about Cas’s deal and possibly about their fake win. 

Billie’s with her scythe and bunker intrusion symbols could also be from here (or from one the previous episodes ends, especially for Billie - as a cliffhanger). And it should be the case for Sam and Jack, I suppose. Because there is no other way for Dean and Cas to face Cas’s deal with just two of them. 

Destiel confession will be here, in more explicit form that it could be in 15x16, because there will be A TALK, but I don’t think we’ll see something real explicit. 

Maybe, Dean’ll say he loves Cas. Maybe not. I’m sure only about the fact that we’ll cry by the end of this episode. And that will be AN UGLY CRYING, just as Jensen said.

Well, maybe there will be a hint that Cas can be brought back, but I think it won’t. So prepare yourselves, my friends. 

Season 15 | Episode 19. Inherit the Earth

Here I think Sam’s appreciative words to Dean are taken from. They are definitely comforting. ‘Cause you know, Cas is dead, Chuck is alive. Possibly Cas was in his way and Chuck erased him by making him believe in their win.

I also think Dean’s crying words “this whole mission, saving the world” belong to this episode and will be in conversation with Sam. 

They still need to fight Chuck, and Jack is still alive. Here Michael will appear and helps. And there is one moment Sergey mentioned in 15x07, about the key to the Death’s library. He even described what it looks like! Cas heard that as well as Eileen. Well, if Cas is taken, then Eileen should return to the Winchesters, maybe with Sam and Jack, or just tell them about this key. 

I don’t know what they are going to do after. Open this library? How? Find how to kill God? Or not? Will they try to save Cas?

I think they will not talk about Cas’s saving. And he will be dead in this episode for sure.

Also I think they’ll deal with God in this episode, one way or another.

Season 15 | Episode 20. Carry On

This is a land of unlimited speculation!

I hope Dean’ll have Cas back by the end of episode. I think Cas’ll save himself from the Empty, ‘cause, you know, he has a big goal there. The Empty tortures all the dead angels and demons, as far as we know. It should be fixed - Cas’s already made a promise to Ruby. And we know that Cas has no problem with ruining something and messing it up - he is basically THE GREAT TRICKSTER of this show. 

Rebelling against Heaven and ruining angels’ plans? Check. Stopping Apocalypse? Check. Opening Purgatory? Check. Becoming a new God? Check. Bringing the Leviathans? Check. Casting all the angels out of Heaven and burning their wings? Check. Becoming human? Check. Becoming an angel by devouring other angels’ grace? Check. Getting an army of angels? Check. Giving up this army for one human? Check. Kidnapping angels’ prisoner? Check. Letting Lucifer in? Check. Helping “an abomination”, Devil’s son, to be born? Check. Annoying Empty so much that it brought him back to life? Check. Making a deal with the Empty? Check. 

It’s very dangerous to mess with Cas, you just don’t know what he could do for the greater good, and yep, in some way Dean was right when he said that Cas is “something that’s always going wrong”. So I think the Empty is in trouble here, not vice versa.  

Also, there is one more thing that bothers me. When Nick in 14th season was praying to Lucifer, he woke him up in the Empty. Theoretically, Lucifer can be awake by now. It could be a dead end, but still. Lucifer’s “true face” is similar to the Empty’s, sooo... 

I don’t know what to think about it and the fact that Nick could reach Lucifer and return him from the Empty, so let’s move on.  

I hope for the happy end for Sam (maybe with Eileen) and for all the hunters we know. They are family. 

NO MCD here! If someone’ll die - they shouldn’t be Sam, Dean or Cas. I don’t want to see Eileen’s death either. I don’t know what about Jack. I don’t want him to die, but he is 100% supernatural being, and I am not sure what it means for him to die. 

Monsters should stay, hunters should hunt them. We’ll see that the “family business” thrives.    

There should be an order on the all levels - in Heaven, Hell and on Earth. There should be the new Death - of they should return Billie. Rowena running the Hell would be perfect. Wonder if Naomi could run Heaven. Maybe it will be Chuck? If he will be redeemed. Or Michael. 

I don’t know what’s for the Empty and Amara. 

I don’t know what the end for Jack will be. I’d like he will be alive, but I just don’t know. He can’t be a human. That will be right thing for Cas, but not for Jack. 

I hope for Destiel endgame, as well as for Sam/Eileen. Cas should become a human, maybe, with some supernatural skills left.   

I doubt that we have proper scenes of these ships together or Cas’ humanity. Just hints. But they can be very obvious - especially if we’ll see Dean’s reaction to Cas’s returning. 

So, I hope to see them. 

But, as I said, it's a land of unlimited speculation. We’ll wait and see. 

What else should be resolved:

- Kevin can’t stay a ghost! It’s my main point here. He also can’t go to Hell. What will happen with him and in which episode? I don’t know. I just hope they won’t forget about him. 

- There is the shot with Bobby from? 15x20? He should be somewhere. 

- Also, there should be Charlie in this season unless something’s changed. Where is she?

- What are they going to do with alternative!Winchesters from 15x13? They will rest? They will make another HunterCorp? They will be gone?! Come on, something needs to be done with them! Of course, they are not so important here, so the writers can forget about them, but still, I’m interested.

What am I going to do:

I'm going to watch all the last episodes of the season. AND THEN, if there will be no happy end for the Winchester boys and Cas won’t be with them, I'm going to rebel. :) In every possible way - petitions, letters, actions etc. We are grown-up people here. We can fight for our rights, and it's my crucial right - to be happy about my favorite show ending. :) 

__________________

Feel free to ask me anything or to comment. My ask is working!

[jerkbitchidjitassbutt]

What If I Told You (9)

Characters: Jensen x Reader; Jared Padalecki; SPN Cast members at times.

Summary: You and Jensen have been the closest of friends for years after meeting on the set of SPN, but what will happen when you and Jensen have a kissing scene?

Warnings: Cursing; divorce; break up; angst-ish at times, but mostly fluff. For this chapter: Canon divergence from the show, spn-related sadness.

I consider this an AU, as Jensen is divorced from an unnamed ex in this fic. This is completely a work of fiction, and I wouldn’t want his reality to be any different, this is purely for entertainment.

A/n: Just a tiny bit more until the big one. Flashbacks are in italics.

The darkened wood of the porch swing rasped slightly as you swung back and forth, but the only sound that rung in your ears was your own heartbeat. Jensen’s eyes glazed as they stared into yours, the words he’d just spoken hanging heavily in the air.

“I was begging myself not to leave you.”

He gave you a small smile, as if to say a million words with a single action that was only meant for you.

Leaning slightly into his side, the scent of his aftershave filling your senses, you reassured him, “Don’t worry, Jay. I promise, I’m not going anywhere.” You whispered.

His dimples appeared as he gave a genuine, gorgeous smile. “You know…” he began, gazing at the jade lawn and blossoming blooms of the small garden, “this is a pretty nice place.”

Taking in the scenery, you agreed. The home itself was picturesque. “Yeah. Something I’d like to have one day.”

Jensen gripped your hand tightly before Clint whistled for you gently, hoping to usher you into the waiting SUV to take you back to set. Jensen, Jared, and Misha had one more scene to film on location at the ‘borrowed’ house with the red front door and another down the road, but it was already nearing four o’clock in the afternoon and you were due back at the studio for make-up and wardrobe removal.

The two of you stood from the swing on the front porch and, to your surprise, Jensen walked you down the steps and sidewalk to your bodyguard’s vehicle.

Jensen quickly stepped in front of you to grip the handle, opening the back door and gesturing for you to slide in.

“Ever the gentleman.” You giggled, feeling a rush to your cheeks.

“Well, you know me… gotta keep it interesting.” He smirked.

You halted before stepping in through the open door and turned to face him. Jensen had caged you within the frame of the door and his body, resting his hands both on the door and the cool metal of the car’s frame, blocking you from the remainder of those on set. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust those he worked with, but he was a man that enjoyed his privacy, especially with those he was closest to.

You felt suddenly small in the confines of the space and under the watchful gaze of Jensen. He was the person you felt most comfortable around and knew you to the depths of your secrets, yet in this moment you felt as though all new ones were coming to the surface. You wrung your hands into knots behind your back as you swayed onto the balls of your feet, anxiously posing, “So, I guess I’ll see you at Rob’s thing tonight?”

“Yeah. Yeah—I’ll be there. I want to say ‘screw it’ and run off with you now and, uh… have that talk, but you know how it is. I’ve got to get back in there.” He said, seemingly nervous as well, but also collected and steady.

“No, yeah… I get that. No worries.” You sputtered, casting your eyes to your shoes for no reason at all, other than to avoid his.

“Hey.” He said, releasing the hand that was holding the door to tuck it beneath your chin, he index finger and thumb planting themselves to turn your face to him. “It’ll happen sweetheart. I promise. I’m anxious too, don't worry.”

You smiled in his embrace. He had an unexplainable gift of knowing precisely what you needed to hear. It was almost as if you were consistently thinking that you were going to wake up and it would all have been a dream; the kiss, the message, the emotions he had expressed, but he was doing everything to ensure you knew it wasn't.

“Okay. Promise?” you said with a smirk, extending your pinky finger.

He eyed your outstretched hand with a grin, releasing your chin to lock his smallest finger with yours. As he enclosed it around his own, he tugged it gently towards him, pulling you closer to lay a gentle, quick peck of a kiss to your lips that left a tingle in its wake. “Promise.”

He retreated to the sidewalk as you hopped onto the leather seat of Clint’s car and shut the door for you, waving as the car sped off down the street.

You cast your eyes out of the darkened glass of the window, eyeing the man who had shaken you to your core who was still standing on the gray sidewalk. He seemed even more beautiful in the late afternoon light that shown behind him, blooming in iridescence and arcs of color.

Secretly, Jensen was as nervous and apprehensive as you were, but he couldn’t deny any longer that this was what he wanted and now—now he was sure you felt the same. All of the trepidation from days past was slowly dwindling to new nerves; now he just wanted to make everything perfect. If he was honest with himself, this was no longer a question of whether, it was a question of how.

.....

Yesterday

“Hey man, glad you made it.” Jared said, not standing from his seat on his couch when Jensen let himself in through the front door of his apartment. Gen and the kids were with family in Austin in their new home, so Jared was by himself for the majority of this season.

“Yeah, thanks for the call.” Jensen said sarcastically.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Did I… interrupt something?” he enunciated.

“No.” Jensen replied immediately and a little too quickly. “No. Well—maybe? I don't know.”

That was enough to make Jared quickly stand. His long limbs carried him to where Jensen was pacing, fists shoved tightly into his leather jacket when his friend reached him. “Tell me what happened.”

“Well.” He began, “We kissed.”

“Yeah, and?” Jared probed.

Jensen looked at his friend with a slightly stunned expression, “I… I don't know, man. I don't think I’ve ever had a kiss like that. It was just supposed to be rehearsal kiss, but I couldn’t stop myself.”

Jared hid the smirk that was sneaking below the surface, an unmistakable glint in his friend’s eye—it wasn’t just a kiss. There was more to be told. “Okay, what else happened?”

Jensen paused, his eyes widening with realization as he replayed the rehearsed scene in his mind, “I said her name.” he all but sighed.

“Huh?” Jared asked, confused.

“In the scene… I said Y/n instead of Y/c/n… when I said, ‘I love you’. It was part of the script and I—I messed up. I let it slip.”

Jared could sense the battle raging in his friend’s mind, so he pushed further, “Okay, so what is it?”

Jensen raised a brow, curious as to where his friend’s mind was leading, “What do you mean?”

Using his height to boost himself, Jared perched against his kitchen counter, his long legs and torso making it easy to prop his hips against the marble and gestured towards his friend, “What’s holding you back? What’s making it so hard for you to admit that it wasn’t a slip up at all, but that you actually do feel that way for her? You said it was about your friendship—that you didn’t want to ruin it, but could it be something deeper than that? I get it if you’re scared, man. You don’t want to get hurt again or put yourself out there if it’s not given back. But answer me this…  Was there anything behind that kiss that makes you question it? In that moment, did you even question if she felt it too?”

Jensen let himself relive the feeling of holding you in his arms, the softness of your skin underneath his fingertips, and the fire that erupted in his chest the minute his lips touched yours.

Jared’s lip curled at the edges as he watched Jensen’s expression shift from shock and confusion to realization as he asked, “Do you really think she—”

“Yeah.” Jared interrupted, clasping his friend on the shoulder. “Yeah, I think she does. Now, the only question is: are you going to let your fear of ruining your ‘friendship’ ruin any chance with her, or are you gonna go for it? Because, if you want my advice—which you always do…” he said, giving a slight, boastful bow, “I think you should go for it. No more games, no more ‘what-ifs’… nothing. Just take the dive.”

Jensen felt his chest tighten with excitement at the thought. Giving his friend a nod and a smile, he left with a resolve and a dinner appointment with the executives of the studio fast approaching, one which he could only hope would pass quickly.

After reaching your voicemail later that night, he only contemplated stopping by your place about five hundred times before returning to his own apartment, sauntering in through the hallway littered with photos. He wasn’t always a nostalgic or ‘feely’ guy, but when it came to his friends and family, he liked to have a reminder of who was behind him through it all. He passed photos of his parents and siblings, of childhood friends who stood the test of time into adulthood, and of Jared and Misha.

Jensen took pause in front of one taken about a year ago, of the two of you on set in Impala. You were nestled under the crook of his arm, tucked into his side and holding him around his waist, but your face was beautifully lit up with laughter. Your eyes were closed, and a brilliant smile made your cheeks a rosy tint. He had just told you what was probably the lamest joke in history, but it tickled you to well into tears after the photo was snapped.

Trust. Laughter. Safety. Excitement. Love. Everything he’d ever want in a relationship—and it was right in front of him.

He couldn’t wait anymore, he had to jump in.

.....

Jared bounded down the front steps in his Sam Winchester attire and clapped Jensen on the shoulder, “Hey man. You gonna take my advice?”

A grin fell upon his lips as your car slipped from view, “Yeah… Yeah, I am.”

<Series Masterlist / Part 10>

A/n 2: I received an anon ask when I was looking for fic ideas(see below) for a Jensen x actress!reader fic a while ago, but recently got hit with a spark of inspiration. This is based off of the song “What if I Said” by Anita Cochran and Steve Wariner and will be a short mini-series. Also there is a wife mentioned in some parts, but I purposefully left this person nameless as to not insinuate anything for Jensen’s real life.                                                                

Anonymous said: Hi! Just saw your post about looking for fic ideas. I’ve had this idea that I really like where reader is an actor on Supernatural and is friends with Jensen. They have a scene where they have to kiss or even just have to be right up in each other’s space and it makes them realize they like each other. It’s probably a common thing to write about, but I thought I’d ask anyway. Thanks!

[supernaturallyobsessedchic]

7 Days to Die - Part 2

Fever

Pairing: Implied Jensen x reader

Warnings: character death! Sadness, reader comforting Jensen, is death angsty? IDK, beware of any possible angst. SPN Level gore.

Word Count: 1,201

Summary: After joining Jensen and Jared’s company, Y/N gets used to the safety and company of others. But things go from bad to worse…

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7

Main Masterlist

Mobile Masterlist

A/N: Easter Egg, Anime viewers: High school of the Dead. “I want to stay myself, until the end.”

~

Sun was high in the sky, indicating it was noon. Three rumbling stomachs indicated as much.

They stopped on the side of the now gravel road to snack down on some granola bars.

“Jared are you okay buddy?” Jensen asked as he munched down on his bar. “You’re looking pale.” He adds.

“I’m fine, think maybe it’s starting to get to me, the stress and whatnot.” He says.

“You sure Jare, we can always stop and rest up.” Jensen asked.

“I’m sure Jay, I don’t want us to slow down because of me. I want to get home.” he says.

Jensen silently agrees.

“So what’s your camp like?” Y/N asked.

“Well, its like a small city considering it’s everyone from set and their families that made it.” Jensen said. “Some people just learned skills as they went along, like Misha, he’s a medic. Chuck, he’s doing inventory on trades and scavenges, and even prepares for said hunts.” He explained.

“Benny is head of security, well both him and Jensen here.” Jared said.

“What about you Jared?” She asked.

“I’m in charge of most scavenges, to lighten the load for Chuck.” Jared said.

She was the first to finish her granola bar, Jensen soon after. But Jared hardly touched his.

“Dude, you sure you okay?” Jensen growing concerned.

“I’m fine, just not hungry is all.” Jared said, saving the bar for later.

 Their day was about to draw to a close, the sun was just about to set.

“Are we close to another hold out?” Y/N asked.

“It’s just up this road here.” Jensen says.

Jensen was in the lead, and Y/N wasn’t far behind. But he heard the definite thud of something hard hitting the ground. He turns to see Jared collapsed behind Y/N.

“Jared!” He alerted.

Y/N turned to see Jared unconscious. She is first to his side, places a careful hand on his head.

“Holy shit, he’s burning up.” She exclaimed.

“We need to get him to the hold out now.” Jensen says, grabbing Jared’s arm. Pulling him to his feet and they walked to another cabin, much bigger than the last one.

 After they laid him down, moments later he’s awake, aware and writhing in pain.

Jensen not once leaving his side.

Placing a cold rag on Jared’s head trying to keep him cool.

Jared turned to his side throwing up whatever in his stomach, mixed with blood.

“It hurts Jay!” Jared writhed.

“I know, it’s okay man, I’ll take care of you.”  Jensen says.

Y/N stuck by, checking Jared if he got bit. Seeing a wrapped up bandage on his leg, that is now discolored. Looking dead, black, grey and some yellow and purple.

“Jensen, look.” Y/N says. Sounding scared.

“What the…” Jensen says, getting up looking at the leg.

“One of them scratched him, I know it. The last place I was at, the guy that was with me on a supply run was attacked. He wasn’t bit but he had a scratch on his neck. He had a nasty fever, no appetite, god, why didn’t I notice before.” She began. Cursing herself she knew the signs, but didn’t think anything of it.

“It’s okay, you didn’t know. Jared’s good at hiding this sort of thing.” Jensen says, trying to help her not beat herself up.

Jared writhed more, violently. Shouting and yelling in pain.

“It hurts!” he shouted.

Jensen tries to hold him down by the shoulders, to keep him in bed as best as he could.

“I know buddy, but we’re gonna help you before it get’s worse okay, promise.” Jensen says, trying to soothe his best friend.

“I’m gonna die, I know it.” Jared chokes out, before coughing up blood. Turning to his side, even puking some blood in the process.

“No, don’t say that, we’re gonna help you.” Jensen says.

“Jay face it,” Jared says, a little more calmer and collected. But his face distorted in pain. “A walker scratched me, it’s worse than being bit.” He says.

Jensen didn’t want to believe it. He turns, looking away to collect himself as best as he could.

“I’m sorry brother, but my story ends here.” Jared says. “But I got to ask you two a favor, please,” he begins.

Jensen shakes his head. Knowing what he’s about to ask.

“Please, Jay, I know it’ll be tough. But I don’t want to be one of those things. I don’t want to walk around and hurt people. I want to stay myself, until the end.” He says.

In a beat, Jared is in so much pain he falls out of bed, writhing, gripping his sides. Yelling and shouting.

Jensen couldn’t do anything as he tried to soothe his friend who was now dying on the floor.

“I can’t, Jared!” he shouted over Jared. “I can’t!” he shouts. As Jared yelled out his final pained yell.

Y/N, behind Jensen, who saw all of this unfold, falls to her knees.

“It was just a scratch, how did it get so horrible?” she asked, voice sounding like she’s in a catatonic state.

“I can’t.” Jensen whispers.

His head hung low as he mourns his friends death.

Y/N stands, walks over to Jensen’s side. Places a comforting hand on his shoulder, kneeling next to him. He placed his hand over hers. Accepting her affection.

They noticed his arm twitched.

“He’s…” Y/N says.

Jensen jumped into action, taking Y/N in his arms, he moves her away from Jared.

Jared stands, slumped, and undead. It’s clear, Jensen doesn’t want to see Jared hurt or kill anyone.

Moving from Y/N, with her standing behind him. Jensen grabs the gun from his waistband at his side.

“I’m sorry buddy.” He says quietly. Turning the safety off, he cocks it ready. Jared starts to slowly walk toward them. Growling, hungry. “I’ll see you on the other side. Brother.” He says.

Lifting the gun, aiming it high. Firing one bullet, hitting Jared square between the eyes. Jared dropping dead before he could hurt them.

 They stood outside the cabin, watching the flames take Jared’s body.

The sun began to rise as they walked on the gravel path quietly. No words exchanged. Not even when they stopped midday for their lunch snack.

They neared a cabin once night fell. Jensen got the fire going in the fireplace in the living room.

Y/N entered the living from the hallway where the bathroom was. Having washed her hair out as best she could, and her skin. She can see he was not having a good time.

He stayed knelt by the fireplace. She walks quietly over to him, placing a comforting hand on him once again. Even wrapping her arm around his broad shoulders, and the comforting hand on his bicep.

He fights her affection, not wanting to cry in front of her. Not wanting to show a weakness. But she too was fighting sobs that tore at her throat.

“I know Jay.” She says. The sound of her fighting her sobs broke him. And he turned into her embrace.

“I know,” she says. As she held him, letting him cry it out. “I’m, so sorry.” She whispers.

One little scratch, just gone from bad to worse.

~

Keep the feedback coming, What do you think? Comment or ask to let me know what you think so far. :)

~

Jensen Tags:

@luci-in-trenchcoats​, @supernatural-jackles​, @becs-bunker​, @mlovesstories​, @winchesters-favorite-girl​, @backseat-of-deans-67chevy​, @salt-n-burn-em-all​, @moonlight-on-her-skin​

[letterstothemidnightsociety]

Another day of quarantine, another attempt to decipher the secret to one show’s mind-boggling longevity - Are they casting spells on every airdate? Do they have some kind of talisman? Did they make an actual deal with a literal devil to stay on the air this long?? The fact that Jensen Ackles has barely aged a day sure suggests they might have. It’s Supernatural! 

I think one of my favorite things so far has been the trailer that plays at the end of “Crossroad Blues” to really make sure you tune into the next episode which...did not play for two weeks. Looking at air dates, “Crossroad Blues” plays on Nov 16, 2006, so that’s right around the Thanksgiving break. Then they come back for ONE episode on Dec 7 and that is their midseason finale. TV programming is wild. 

I was like, really into this Bobby Johnson, like...I was into that.

It’s very possible that at this point in the season, SPN is trying real hard to keep their audience. Looking at the numbers for all the episodes leading up to “Croatoan”, they’re only averaging between 3 and 4 million viewers, roughly 1 - 2 million less than where they were at this time in season 1, so it’s easy to see why SPN was on the hook for renewal in season 2. Looking over its ratings for the rest of the season, the audience numbers just keep going down. The show is the number 8 highest rated show on the CW in 2006/07, so technically in the top 10, but it’s tied with Reba and One Tree Hill and the CW only had (16) original programs that year, so it’s not boasting much. These numbers supposedly include Live + 7 day DVR watches, so those numbers really are not good, BUT: starting in January of 2007, the CW started releasing episodes online the day after they aired, so I’m willing to bet that large portions of their audience were still tuning in, just not tuning in in a way that could be tabulated by Neilsen at the time. 

It’s also interesting to note that for both season 1 and season 2, the real mythos/lore/arc episodes don’t really start until the midseason. In season 1, it’s not until episode 10, “Scarecrow,” where we’re introduced to Meg and the bigger stakes at hand for the Winchesters. Their search for their father starts ramping up and the show starts subtly shifting away from Finding Dad to Fighting The Boss Fight. 

Season 2 is pretty similar. Up until “Croatoan��� (episode 9), the show has been about the fallout from John’s death. Finding the yellow-eyed-demon is certainly a driving factor, but it’s very much on the backburner. The show even makes a point to say, hey! Our guys don’t really have any leads, so it’s gonna take a while before we get back to this. 

I actually really appreciate that the show takes this much time to let the Winchester process their grief. Kripke and Co. have said numerous times that they realized the episodes that work best are the ones that really dig into the emotional journeys of the characters, so they just went ahead and made that the primary focus of the first half of the season. It gives weight to their loss at the beginning of the season - John’s death is not some throwaway plot point, it’s a real gut punch that our characters aren’t going to get over in a hurry. It also lends weight to the danger the brothers face in the future - John died immediately, who’s to say that won’t happen to Sam or Dean? 

I mean, sure buddy, but also...no one here is okay.

Not to mention, John’s deal with the yellow-eyed-demon (+ the events in “Crossroad Blues”) give us a subtle/not-so-subtle hint as to what’s waiting for us at the end of season 2. But we’re not there yet. 

Then we’re in “Croatoan” and reminded in full force what our guys are supposed to be fighting this season - not their crippling grief but rather a very present threat to their physical and spiritual well-being. That’s not to say we haven’t had a taste of the Sam-centric plotline that appears in “Croatoan”. BUT I’d argue that even though “Simon Said” deals with the Psychic Children, it’s still only a tease for what those children are capable of. “Croatoan” really drives home the threat from the yellow-eyed-demon, not just from his Psychic Children but also whatever nefarious plans that he’s been cooking for however-long. And it puts this threat front and center as a main quest for the back 13 of the season. 

Because of COURSE demon viruses come with their own dusting of sulfur.

Doing the math on this, it looks like SPN had a Front 9/Back 13 split? As in, they got picked up for the first 9 episodes of season 2 but weren’t sure they were going to get those final 13 episodes and that is...crazy? I have not seen any proof this is the case, but it is something to consider for a show that was on the edge of cancellation for this season and last season. It’s possible that the CW was treating all of its programming like they were pilot seasons since this was, essentially, CW’s pilot season, but again - I have no evidence other than this 9/13 split to prove it. 

Back to the show. Let me just say: I LOVE “Croatoan.” Any time anyone wants to make up a supernatural reason for an obscure historical mystery, I am ON. BOARD. And the Lost Colony of Roanoke is definitely one of my favorites. I STILL love this episode even though I can hear my friend whispering through the decades, ”The colonists just intermarried with the local native tribe, the Croatoans…” which is apparently actually the answer in real life. But demon viruses are fine, and particularly relevant in The Year of Our Troubles 2020. 

CROATOAAAAAAAAA!!!

What also works in “Croatoan” is the dynamics between the brothers that will play out for the rest of the season/series. The groundwork for their big fight at the end of this episode has already been laid in the beginning of the season. On the one hand, you have Dean, who’s lost so much at the hands of the yellow-eyed-demon he can’t stand to lose anymore, especially not his brother. On the other hand, Sam is becoming more like his father - ready and willing to sacrifice whatever needs to be sacrificed to defeat this thing, even if that means giving up his own life. Sam has the same motivation that Dean has but coming from a completely different direction. If his death will save his brother, then he’ll do it, no questions asked, just like John died to save Dean. Neither of the brothers are willing to lose the other and they will go on to make increasingly stupid, selfish decisions to make sure they won’t have to. Yes, I love this show, and I love Sam and Dean, but man they are DUMB BABIES. 

OOF.

So we get “Croatoan,” where we see the stakes at hand - the yellow-eyed-demon is out for World Destruction, not just Winchester Destruction. He may have plans for the Psychic Children, but his plans reach far beyond a bunch of 20YO with wacky powers. And when Sam gets infected with the demon virus (LOL, sulfur in the blood?????), he knows he’s a danger to others and is immediately ready to sacrifice his life to keep those around him safe. Dean goes on to prove that this is a line too far - he’ll keep others safe but if the choice is between killing his brother and anything else, he will literally choose anything else. Sam turns out to be fine in a mysterious kind of way, although the town clearly is not, and the boys ride off into the sunset. Then we get the cliffhanger - John told Dean something important that we will not find out until January. 

These dolly shots crack me right up.

If you’re watching this in real time, you wait a month for that cliff hanger to resolve itself in “Hunted”. If you are living in the era of streaming, you just skip the closing credits to find out what John said - “He said that I [Dean] had to save you...and that if I couldn't, I'd . . .That I'd have to kill you.” 

Are you ever just like, What the actual F*CK, John Winchester?

This is literally Dean’s worst nightmare - having to choose between duty and family. Sam understandably doesn’t take this well to start with, but like in “Croatoan”, he ultimately settles into the idea, which is...deeply upsetting??? 

“Hunted” does a lot of fun things - 

Number 1: We get more of the Psychic Children (because I REFUSE to call them the Special Children, sorrynotsorry). We see that there’s a range of Types, from Scott who definitely looks like a serial killer to Ava, who ultimately goes on to be the headmistress at a secret magic university (OMG, DO watch The Order cuz that shiz is GOLD.)

Seriously, if you liked Supernatural, you will like this show. 

Number 2: We get the return of Gordon, this time as a head-on antagonist. Do I like Gordon? No, I find him frustrating at best. But do I LOVE Gordon as an antagonist? Absolutely! He is smart, capable, and (at this point) wholly non-supernatural, Natural, if you will. He’s such a good foil to Sam and Dean and he’s the perfect villain for this moment. He sees the world in only black and white. To him, there’s no moral dilemma as to whether or not the Psychic Children are good or bad - they’re definitely bad and he’s here to stop/kill them. I think he’s an important catalyst for Dean too, since in both of Gordon’s episodes, Dean sees what he could be if it wasn’t for Sam’s influence. He doesn’t want to be like Gordon, so he needs to keep Sam around.

Number 3: Alright, this one isn’t so fun just cuz the final scene is a little sloppy, but Ava turns out to be a good catalyst for Sam. When Ava shows up on screen, she is clearly on Team Cool Kid. She’s totally normal, very Apple Pie, but she shows up to try and save Sam’s life simply because it’s a life that she can (hypothetically) save. She knows nothing about demons or curses or Chosen Ones, she just had a weird dream that gave her a weird feeling and then she acted on out of the goodness of her heart. It’s exactly what Sam does when his dreams kick it into high gear in season 1 (with mixed results). Sam hangs out with Ava, gets to know her, gives her the whole Truth is Out There speech and when she leaves, I actually really appreciate this character. She’s had a wild ride of a day and she is just taking this whole thing totally in stride. Good on you, Ava! 

Except, when we get to the end of the episode and Sam tries to check in on her, we find her fiancé with his throat cut, sulfur on the window sill, and Ava nowhere to be seen. Now I don’t remember what I thought the first time I saw this episode, but I don’t believe that Ava killedher fiancé. The show really seems to want me to believe that she killed her fiancé, though, indicating that no matter how cool she was at the beginning of the episode, it’s only a matter of time before all the Psychic Children “go darkside”, as Sam so strangely puts it. 

Anyone else this this was a weird line? I thought this was a weird line. 

And this is what pushes Sam’s arc through the rest of the season. Our next episode is “Playthings,” which feels like a monster-of-the-week episode where they squeeze in some unrelated emotional drama. Or maybe it’s the other way around. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a fun episode, but SPN is usually better about tying their MotW eps into the emotional character arcs and this one is not as finessed. There’s a little more disconnect here. The important takeaway from “Playthings” is this: seeing Ava “kill” her fiancé convinces Sam that his father was right. Sam may need to be put down, and if that happens, he wants Dean to be the one to do it. Dean agrees, but we all know that he’s doing that just to appease Sam and that he’s still gonna do whatever it takes to save Sam, no matter the cost. Nothing gets resolved and this will definitely come back later. 

I mean, yeah that’s probably true.

Some things - 

First off: Sam seems to be perfectly OK with this and that...is not OK. 

Secondly, SAM?!? WHY would you put that on your brother?? 

Thirdly, DEAN! Don’t make promises you don’t intend to keep. 

FINALLY, and maybe most importantly, this is the best example I can think of to showcase a character’s greatest strength also being their greatest weakness. The Winchesters are about two things - fighting evil and taking care of family. Done in equal measure, these strengths make them heroic tropes. Taken to extreme situations? Well, now you have two humans wide open to failing at one of these things so bad that the apocalypse literally starts.

What these three episodes remind us, honestly what this whole season so far reminds us, is that Supernatural works because of relationships. The monsters and the mythology and the classic rock are there as a fun framework to get us interested in the show, but it’s the characters that keep us. That’s what viewers connect to. I really appreciate the arguments that Sam and Dean have with each other, starting at the end of season one and up until now in season 2. They feel very deeply rooted in character, not contrived for the sake of Drama. Neither of them is wrong, per se, but then neither of them is right, either. Their emotional backgrounds feel complex and grounded, foundations for real characters, not just the caricatures that you’d expect from a show about ghosts on a network aimed at the 18 - 24 demographic. 

See, THIS is the sort of fight you’d expect, not a fight where one brother is begging the other to literally kill him. 

And this is gonna be the hill that I’ll die on - characters and relationships are always the heart of any successful franchise. I mean, why else are there so many shipping wars out there? Why write fic if it isn’t to explore relationships and aspects of a character that the show doesn’t present? Sure it’s not the only reason to write fic, but I’d argue it’s a BIG reason. 

Because it’s not just the characters building relationships with each other, it's the audience building relationships with those characters (and to a lesser extent, with the world of the story). This is the core of any show that hopes to make it past season one and beyond, no matter the decade, the network, or the platform it airs on. We like stories about people with problems we can relate to. Dysfunctional family trouble? Check. Drama at work? Been there. Feeling like the world’s about to end any second? Oh yes. You can feel those problems deep down in your gut, even if the specifics are different. It doesn’t matter if those people are working in an office or a hospital or hunting down demons in the dead of night. If you can show us people, real people with something we can relate to on a gut level, that’s how you stay on the air for 15 seasons.

[charlie-minion]

21 Supernatural Questions

I was tagged by @amwritingmeta – thank you for including me, sweetie. You’re so lovely! I gotta tell you that it honestly made my day when I read that one of my favorite meta writers considers my blog one of her favorites, so yeah… thanks! :’D

Now let’s tackle these super fun questions ;-)

1. When did you start watching Supernatural?

I remember I watched for the first time around 2009. Season 4 was on, here in my country, on Warner Channel. I’m sure that season had already finished in the U.S. at that time, but it was just starting to air here in El Salvador. I didn’t know anything about the show and I didn’t know what season that was either, but now I know it was 4 because all I remember was that some dude had rescued another dude from Hell. Period. I understood next to nothing about the plot because I hadn’t seen any episode prior to the beginning of S4. I caught a few episodes now and then and continued to watch for some time until the schedule changed. The eps started to air at 11:00 p.m. and I had to get up early for work, so I stopped watching.

In 2013, I spent one year living in North Carolina with my older sister. I was having a difficult time, so I moved to my birth country (USA) to escape everyone and everything. I had no TV in my room, but I had my laptop and my sis had the first 7 seasons of Supernatural, so I was like, “Hey! I might FINALLY understand that freaking show that looked so cool”. That’s how I started. I wasn’t planning to binge-watch the whole thing, but it became addictive pretty fast.

I loved the first 3 seasons, but once I got to season 4 and Castiel was introduced, I was hooked for real! When I watched season 5 and I saw the “I did it, all of it, for you” from 5x02, I started Googling Dean and Cas, because I was SO SURE I was seeing romance there, and I couldn’t be the only one. I was super excited when I found out there was a Supernatural FANDOM (back then I had no idea that was a thing). And I was even more excited when I learned about Destiel, about shipping, and about all the fandom culture. I joined Twitter, became a Misha stan because the more I read about him, the more I adored him, and I got caught up just in time to watch 8x17 live.

Can you imagine becoming a Dean/Cas shipper all on my own, doing research, finding out about Destiel and then the VERY FIRST EPISODE I watched live, while living in the U.S., was Goodbye Stranger written by Robbie Thompson?!! Those were the days!

I have been watching live, along with the fandom, ever since March 20, 2013. I joined Tumblr during the hiatus and started writing meta (accidentally) at the very beginning of season 9. So yeah! This show has been a very important part of my life for over 6 years now, and I don’t want to think about how things might change after the show ends. NOPE. Not thinking about it AT ALL. (At least not yet).

2. Who is your favorite in TFW?

I absolutely LOVE my three boys. I want them to be happy because they deserve it. But, we can all have a favorite, right? I was a Dean!girl when I started binge-watching. When Cas was introduced, I became a huge Cas fan, and I thought he had become my favorite. However, lately I’ve understood that I became a huge MISHA fan, and that’s a little different. If we’re talking about the SPN cast, Misha is and will always be my favorite because he’s a real life angel. I love that man with all I have! But, if we’re talking about the SPN characters, I have to admit that I will forever be a Dean!girl, no matter what.

I’ll continue after the cut because, apparently, it’s impossible for me to give brief answers :P

3. Who is your least favorite in TFW?

This question sounds cruel, but I want to understand it in a ranking way, not in an “I hate this character” one.

If I have to rank TFW, for me, it would be:

Dean

Cas

Sam

HOWEVER, let it be known that I love my three boys immensely, and I want a happy endgame for the three of them. If Dean and Cas had a happy ending, but Sammy didn’t, that would ruin it for me. Ranking doesn’t equal hating.

4. Tag your top 5 Supernatural blogs!

I’ve said I follow very few blogs because I curate my fandom experience a lot, but you guys make my time on Tumblr extraordinary. I enjoy seeing you in my dash, reading what you blog or reblog and just knowing that you’re around as part of this community. If you answer these questions, please tag me ‘cause I’d like to read what you got to say about our beloved show. Much love to each of you! ♥♥♥♥♥

@dimples-of-discontent @mittensmorgul @cas-you-assbutt-dean-needs-you @naruhearts @casthegrumpy @fangirlingtodeath513 @bluestar86 @viva-la-cockles @obsessionisaperfume @caswouldratherbehere @perfectlyelegantdelusion @occamshipper @amwritingmeta (and no, Annelie, I’m not tagging you because you tagged me; you truly deserve to be here). 

If you’re not tagged, please forgive my poor memory, but if we’ve talked before, or I reblog/like your posts, please know that I adore you. ♥

5. Who is your favorite character (not including TFW)?

Oh my! This is so hard to answer. Supernatural has had so many amazing characters that choosing only one is hard. But I guess I have to go with Charlie Bradbury. The only time I seriously considered to stop watching the show was when Charlie was killed off. I was very angry and disappointed, and 10x21 became an episode I truly hate. I don’t think I have ever re-watched the whole ep because the writing was SO BAD. Dean and Sam were stupid in that ep, and Cas was basically a lamp. I… NOPE. Disgusting episode for sure. And I lost my beautiful lesbian queen.

 6. Who is your favorite woman in Supernatural?

I should say Charlie again, but because she got covered in my favorite non-TFW character, I will choose someone else for favorite woman.

And that has got to be Rowena. I don’t think there has ever been a female character in Supernatural written better than Rowena. And because the show’s ending, there will never be.  

7. John or Mary?

Definitely Mary. We got to know her better. I know certain parts of the fandom didn’t care much for her, but I loved her a lot, not despite her flaws but because of them! She was made human in a realistic way. We had only seen the idealized version of her through Dean’s eyes, but once we got to meet the real Mary, it was something I enjoyed. John, on the other hand, is not a bad person, but he wasn’t the best parent. He loved his children, and I know that, but his love doesn’t negate all the crap he put his sons through, even if his intentions came from a good place. I like the closure the boys got with him in 14x13, though. I was not against it at all. But, as John would say in that ep, “Me versus your mom? That’s – that’s not even a choice.”

8. What were your first opinions of Sam, Dean, Cas, and Jack?

Dean: Since the first moment I saw Dean, I knew he was faking and was trying to hide how broken he felt. That’s why I fell in love with him from the get-go.

Sam: My first opinion was that he was supposed to be the mature and detached brother.

Cas: I thought that he was meant to be the epitome for the enemies to friends trope. (And I added “to lovers” one season later).

Jack: The only opinion I had was that he was going to be the opposite of Lucifer. The characters were saying he was evil way too early for it not to be subverted. 

9. What’s your favorite season?

There are many seasons I love. I mean, this show has given us SO MUCH. But, season 8 is probably my favorite for two reasons. First of all, because it was the first one I watched live once I caught up. And to this day, the season finale still blows my mind.

And second, because it was when Carver took the reins of the show and did his best to fix the Gamble era. He gave the Dean/Cas dynamic a serious note, narratively speaking. I’ve said before that even though I shipped Destiel in the previous seasons, it wasn’t until season 8 that I saw an intentional development. It wasn’t played for kicks and laughs anymore, and it wasn’t just Misha’s and Jensen’s doing either. It was in the plot. The whole ‘I stayed one year in Purgatory just to get you back’ and all the ‘I couldn’t bear to think you didn’t want to come with me, so I chose to make it my fault’. Season 8 marked a new era, indeed, and Destiel became a real thing from then on, in my opinion.  

10. What’s your least favorite season?

Even though there are some episodes from that season that I truly love (and they’ve become memorable, like The French Mistake or The Man Who Would Be King), as a whole, I don’t enjoy season 6 much. After a formidable season 5, Sera struggled to keep the boat afloat and it shows. Season 6 is certainly the weakest.

11. Opinions on Destiel?

My whole blog was born because of Destiel, so? What do you want me to say? Hahahaha. Destiel is life. And I can divide my opinion in 4 (depending on the showrunner):

Destiel was a fortunate accident during the Kripke era. It was played for laughs and it was the result of whatever was going on between Jensen and Misha. Their chemistry had nothing to do with the script.

Destiel was a tool during the Gamble era. I don’t like to use the word “queerbait”, but I think the closest Supernatural has been to that was when Sera was the showrunner. It seems to me like she used the ship to lure the fandom and keep the audience, but it’s clear she had no intention of giving a resolution (we all know how she treated Misha, so…).

Destiel became an intentional part of the narrative during the Carver era. As I said before, it wasn’t until season 8 when you could clearly see that things were not accidentally there anymore. It wasn’t a joke, either. The ship sailed for real during the Carver era, but Jeremy was not allowed to give a resolution because the show continued to be renewed.

Destiel became canon during the Dabb era. I mean, I know people will argue that it’s not canon yet. And I understand what they mean. But, in my opinion, Destiel hasn’t been TEXTUALLY made canon, but when Andrew took the reins of the show, he made Dean and Cas sooooo married that I came to the conclusion explaining the subtext was unnecessary. It was WAY too in the nose to need explaining. So, I stopped trying hahaha. I don’t know if we’ll ever get Textual Canon Destiel, but in regards to Subtext, it can’t get more canon than that. And noooo, that doesn’t mean queerbait at all. Queercoding is a thing, you know?

12. Do you believe Supernatural queerbaits?

As per my previous answer, currently I don’t think Supernatural queerbaits. I do believe Dabb, Bobo and company want to give the Dean/Cas storyline a satisfying resolution. I have no idea what they will be allowed to do, but even if they can’t textually give us what we want, I have faith they will find a subtextually strong way to wrap things up. I enjoyed when Misha and Jensen explained in the DC Cockles panel the restrictions the CW puts, and I think it applies to so much more than blood and language.

13. Seasons 1-7 or 8-14?

Seasons 8-14, no doubt. For two reasons: 1) They are really good (and gave Destiel relevance) and 2) those are the seasons when I was already part of the fandom and could enjoy week after week.

14. Favorite villain (plot wise)?

I think Chuck is the best of the best. Because when we look back, we now know that all the other villains were thanks to Chuck’s machinations. Plot wise that’s amazeballs! I mean, the fact that we always thought (or hoped) that God was on the Winchesters’ side just to learn he was the villain all along. Chef’s kiss!

 15. Do you think they should end the Lucifer plot line?

I think they squeezed the freaking Lucifer plot line as much as they could… until it got to a point where I was sick of it. Everything related to Nick and Lucifer in season 14 was stupid and boring, to say the least. The plot line should have ended when Dean stabbed Lucifer. Although… I would have liked a better closure for Sam, but I’m good. As long as I don’t have to see Pellegrino again, I’m good.

16. Who do you think has gone through more trauma (Sam, Dean, or Cas)?

I don’t like this question and refuse to answer because trauma is NOT a competition (either in real life or in fiction). Trauma is trauma and it affects people. Something Sam went through was painful to him and that same thing may be less traumatic to Cas, but that doesn’t mean the repercussions and the suffering are less real for Sam, just because Cas suffered in other ways that may have affected him more. Trauma is personal. All I know is that the three of them have gone through A LOT and that’s why they deserve peace and happiness. Period.

17. What’s your favorite Supernatural episode?

There are more than 300 reasons to love this show. I mean, it’s almost impossible to choose ONE episode out of so many that I love. But for the sake of this question, I will answer with a very personal choice. My favorite ep could probably be 12x22 because of the moments between Dean and Mary. Dean needed a moment to finally say what he had been repressing all his life. All that hate mixed with all that love. He needed to let it out. And it was both gut-wrenching and beautiful to watch. I always cry when I see it (and I mean gross sobbing for real).

18. Do you like case episodes?

I like them most of the time. I don’t enjoy them so much when they air because I would like the plot to move forward, but it’s the case episodes where we learn more about what’s going on with our characters (their internal emotional battles) through other characters and subtext. It’s an interesting exercise, and that’s why I end up liking most case episodes in the end.

19. Who do you relate most to in TFW?

For people who have been following my blog for some time, this will come as no surprise. I relate the most to Dean Winchester.

In fact, I AM DEAN. I can find in my life every single thing about Dean’s journey. I came to accept my sexuality thanks to Dean (first as bisexual, and later as demisexual once I became more educated). I have felt worthless and like I don’t deserve to live or to be loved, just as much as Dean. I have felt like a burden, like I’m here just to help/please others, and if I’m not doing that, then I’m failing at life.

I get why Dean lashes out and hurts the people he loves even though he’s so afraid to lose them. I understand why Dean builds huge walls to protect himself from being hurt and what he needs to grow. Because his struggles are my struggles. And now I’m crying, so I better move on to the next question.  

20. Why do you like Supernatural?

I like Supernatural because I’ve been able to learn about myself thanks to the characters. Despite being a genre show, the personal journeys (character arcs) have been so real and relatable that I truly think this show is a masterpiece. The fact that I’ve grown as a human being thanks to an ordinary TV show is incredible. I don’t think there will ever be another show like Supernatural in my life.

21. If you could bring back one character and kill off another who would they be?

I would bring back Charlie. The original Charlie. I mean, I know we have seen lovely Felicia Day again thanks to AU!Charlie, but I couldn’t connect with her the same way I did with the original one. Probably because not even the boys have been able to connect with her the same way, either. They see her and they will always see the little sister they lost. It’s hard to think of AU!Charlie as her own person if she always reminds you of the one you lost. ETA: I forgot who I would kill. I guess no one. I mean, if Lucifer were still around, I'd kill him. Or Nick. I just got tired of his face.

Wow! This turned into a very long post, but I had so much fun.

I tag EVERYONE who would like to do this as a way to pay tribute to our wonderful show. Much love to y’all!

[wearingmywings]

Destiel Meta - an outsider’s perspective

I’ve been reading meta for about a year, but now I wanted to add my own post regarding it.

I don’t really see things when I first watch episodes, I don’t get mirrors or parallels or pay attention to background details like wallpaper or neon signs or anything like that. I’m not good at analyzing things or interpreting it, not in literature nor film, I don’t do something in this area professionally or studied it. 

However, there are some things that jumped out so much that even I thought “Hey, that’s something!”.

Part 1: Mirrors

Seriously, mirrors? You’re telling me that it’s a known method to present mirrors to characters, that they can be used in subtle or totally obvious forms, and they can tell you a lot about the character that’s being mirrored just by existing? Wow that’s so cool!

14x300: In the first scenes when my friend yelled “Look! they look like Dean and Cas!”, I wasn’t 100% sure if that’s what was going on, but oh boi at the end of the episode it was crystal fucking clear. Three people next to each other, the one on the right taller than the others, one is wearing a jacket resembling a trench coat, one is wearing plaid. Trenchcoatjacket and Plaid are holding hands.

We noticed Plaid’s crush on Trenchcoatjacket the whole episode, it was so obvious! Hm, what else was there in resemblance? I remember the taller kid was pretty nerdy, and Plaid stole the Impala at one point, so it’s pretty clear we have Sam and Dean here, which leaves Cas for the last person, and it fits so well! Thats awesome!!

Apart from “Lebanon”, the episode ‘Mint Condition’ basically taught me how they use mirrors and that I should pay attention to them right now. They pointed out who was Sam and Dean, then resumed with the plot and I sat there thinking “Oh!”.

My friend explained to me how the ghost of that episode relates to John Winchester, and honestly if you follow the train of thought about mirrors that the episode presented to you, it’s pretty easy to get there.

Dreamhunter: The confirmed ship with two girls, ah yes! Again, I don‘t really pick up on visual cues or background stuff, but when Kaia said to Claire “I’ll go with you,” I had flashbacks to the season 11 finale immediately. I mean, using the exact same dilagoue? But alright, maybe they’re gonna keep playing it as a cute subtextual crush or how you call it, because neither of them says “You’re my crush”, so-

Oh, wait, Kaia was also stabbed in front of Claire who screamed “Noo!!”, that’s another striking resemblance. Hm.

Oh, Dreamhunter is confirmed to be a couple thing? Neat! So does that mean all the DeanCas stuff is romantic? Because y’all used the same dialogue and plot.

Part 2: Dean’s pining (season 11)

To be fully honest here, I didn’t understand season 11. At all. I didn’t get the whole Amara thing, why was everyone talking about pining? Dean told us that it wasn’t about desire with him and Amara, just a weird fixation, but still, the lady in the senior home told Dean that he “was pining for somebody else”. That makes no sense!

Unless it’s true? Dean didn’t pine for Amara, he tells us that, but everyone’s still talking about pining, therefore the topic of pining is important. Dean x Amara wasn’t romantic, that’s clear from what Dean told us and how he behaved, so no pining.

The only person left he could pine for is Cas. The dude who let in Lucifer, who Dean’s worried about, who Amara touches and she knows where Dean is? That’s..interesting. I’m still kinda confused, but some things are clearer now. No romance between Dean & Amara, but pining is still a theme, and only Cas makes sense. Got it.

Part 3: Cas’ endgame as being human

I wanted to include this because I’ve had this headcanon for years, then saw the meta community talk about it, and honestly there’s one scene to watch and it’d be clear that Cas wants to be human.

“We need grace-” “He can have mine”. 14x08

Alright dude, you’re so eager and ready to throw away your grace? Okidoki.

To go back in time, everyone always had these TED talks about how Cas loves humanity and loves humans and human things, that he feels stuff (season 4 yall, it’s been a while), that he compliments Hannah with things that “are human”. He doesn’t get along with other angels because they’re different than him, or they don’t understand his love and devotion for humans. He spends pretty much all his time on earth, around humans, because he loves them, and one in particular.

To quote Metatron, “He’s in love with humanity”. Do I need to add more? No? Fantastic, because this post is long enough already.

Part 4: Random things in no particular order

Episode 12x12, because come on. Some people took the gifs of Cas’ deathbed confession and connected them to the shots before, showing you where everyone’s standing, who Cas is looking at, and it’s so bloody clear. Don’t get me started on the singular vs plural “i love you” because I literally don’t have to, it’s right there.

“I could go with you”- season 11 finale. Cas, ready to die to accompany Dean on the suicide mission to save the world. He wants to ease Dean’s fear and be there for him until the very end, without hesitation. Castiel really fucking loves Dean Winchester. Wow.

That’s it I think? Those are the top things that jumped into my face when I watch the show, things I didn’t have to read other people’s thoughts on to understand what’s happening. :)

To finish this up I want to say something about meta writers. I didn’t start out reading meta, I didn’t really care for details and background stuff and took the show as I saw it, which is why I shipped Destiel immediately because there were enough things so blatantly obvious to me that I just had to. Then I found @tinkdw, then @bluestar86, @dotthings, @occamshipper, @postmodernmulticoloredcloak and all the other bloody amazing meta writers, and boom! A whole new world!

I started a series rewatch, read the posts for the episodes or seasons, paid more attention and there was so much to see and notice! It gave me joy in watching SPN in a time where I was kind of burned out because I had just discovered the bad side of the fandom and was a bit hopeless, for my OTP and the show itself. It gave me friends, and interesting conversations, but more importantly: These people helped me be realistic about episodes, upcoming episodes and PR stuff. “PR is not showrunning” was a strange concept to me before they showed me what it meant, and I vividly remember being in tears before all this after some PR material promised amazing things but failed to deliver.

These people are so good at predicting what’s going to happen because they read the fine print and understand it, pack it up and show it to us who either can’t read the fine print or dont notice it. They help fans to control (?) their expectations, to soften blind excitement over promo shots or interviews with people who have either no clue what they’re talking about (Jensen bby, i love you but what are you even saying?) or are purposefully exaggerating things.

They saved me from so much disappointment, they improved my fandom experience and changed my feelings for the show and how I watch it. There are so many interesting things to discover, things that confirm theories and explain plot points. I haven’t been disappointed in a new episode because of PR or rumors since I’ve met them, except ep 300 but that’s...a whole other thing. They were right about that too, though, and I didn’t listen. Catch me crying at four am because of it.

I love those people immensely, and I’m so thankful for them. They take the time to write all these essays about the show, all you have to do is read them.

A toast to meta writers! Consider this your personal love letter.

Kisses,

Jana

[drsilverfish]

DrSilverfish Meta Masterpost S8

Hellatus historical meta masterpost housekeeping! 

I was new to Tumblr in S8 and finding my feet (stylistically as much as anything) as well as live-watching SPN for the first time (usually by shitty overseas live-stream) so, a lot of the early stuff is shippy rambling rather than decent meta. 

I was also much more hopeful that the Destiel subtext might be canon fore-shadowing back in “Season Gr8″ (as we dubbed it at the time).  

Some of this is worth reading, particularly I’d say, from about No 21) “Dean, Nazis and the Closet” onwards, i.e. from commentary on 8x13 Everybody Hates Hitler to the end of the season.

It’s really interesting looking back. There was a lot of disappointment in the Destiel fandom here on Tumblr after 8x17 and the crypt scene in Goodbye Stranger, where it felt as if an “I love you” from Dean to Castiel was, somehow, missing.  This was later (to a reasonable fact-checked standard) confirmed to have indeed been a removed line (by Jensen, who didn’t think it was right for Dean):

http://fandomdebunker.tumblr.com/post/64507789422/the-rumor-that-jensen-confirmed-the-i-love-you 

Looking back, I think he was probably right, but it felt disappointing then, at a time when the queer subtext seemed to be lapping at the shores of breaking waves into main-text. 

For Destiel fans, and queer subtext followers, there was, nevertheless, a lot to love about S8: the “purity” of Purgatory and Dean’s search for his angel; Benny’s “thirst” for Dean; Charlie introducing Dean to LARP-ing; Aaron Bass as Dean’s “gay thing”; Naomi forcing Castiel to kill innumerable Dean-clones in Heaven (evidence that Heaven saw Cas’ feelings for Dean as, in particular, transgressive); and another lovely Cas-centric episode from Edlund, The Great Escapist  (8x21), when Cas cleverly hid from the angels by zapping between multiple Biggersons diners, trapping his angelic pursuers in “quantuum superposition” (lol). 

From Dean’s hallucinations of Cas, and his self-memory-wipe of the fact Cas deliberately let go of his hand at the portal exit from Purgatory, to their tender exchange about Cas’ suicidal ideation in 8x08 Hunter Heroici, to the romantic subtext of Metatron’s angel-fall spell ingredients (see meta below) S8 was (despite poor Cas’ torture by Heaven and his deep depression) a season of reconciliation for Dean and Cas, after the previous season’s (S7) upheavals: Cas’ apparent lake-death; the long separation; Dean’s rage and grief; Emmanuel’s mind-wipe; Cas’ “mental break” (Cas taking on Sam’s cage-match scars as atonement); and the whole Leviathan fall-out from the Godstiel arc. 

S8 remains, despite its disappointments, one of my favourite seasons.    

Season 8

1) Is Supernatural “Queer-Baiting” or is it Erotically Homosocial?

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/35297767675/is-supernatural-queer-baiting-or-is-it 

2) Mulder and Scully vs Cas and Dean - Love, Narrative, and Being ‘”Out”

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/35370673077/mulder-and-scully-vs-cas-and-dean-love

3) What if Sam had a Plan on that Bridge?

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/35474455496/what-if-sam-had-a-plan-on-that-bridge

4)  Dean’s Daddy Issues  (8x05 Blood Brother and 8x06 Southern Comfort)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/35701230407/deans-daddy-issues 

5)  The Course of True Love Never did Run Smooth  (8x07 A Little Slice of Kevin) 

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/35756472429/the-course-of-true-love-never-did-run-smooth 

6) So Castiel is a “God-Forsaken Thing” that Dean “Cares About”? (8x07 A Little Slice of Kevin)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/35835317081/so-castiel-is-a-godforsaken-thing-that-dean

7) “I Wasn’t Weak, I Was Stronger than You - I Pulled Away”: Castiel Getting it Wrong (8x07 A Little Slice of Kevin)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/35842147281/i-wasnt-weak-i-was-stronger-than-you-i-pulled

8) More Than a Boner - The Bathroom Scene Revisited (8x07)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/36022592701/more-than-a-boner-the-bathroom-scene

9) Why Sam Didn’t Look for Dean: Some Speculation

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/36098761529/why-sam-didnt-look-for-dean-some-speculation 

10) Dean/ Cas: A Fine Romance. How Should that Slow On-Screen Build-Up Continue?

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/36172853047/dean-cas-a-fine-romance-how-should-that-slow

11) Dean/Cas, a Fine Romance... How Should THAT Kiss Unfold On-Screen?

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/36249617858/dean-cas-a-fine-romance-how-should-that-kiss

12) 8x07 A Little Slice of Kevin - Dean’s Forgiveness of Castiel

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/36384800654/picture-credit-to 

13) The Textual Threads of Dean Winchester’s Beautiful, Ambivalent, Sexuality

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/36540877041/the-textual-threads-of-dean-winchesters 

14) 8x08 Hunter Heroici - What if Dean and Cas were Damon and Elena?

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/36884331511/what-if-dean-and-cas-were-damon-and-elena)

15) Dean and Cas: The Sky is Going to Rain Crimson for Those Two

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/37361902553/dean-and-cas-the-sky-is-going-to-rain-crimson-for

16) In Which S4 Illuminates S8 (Mini-Meta)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/40124370749/in-which-season-4-illuminates-season-8-mini-meta

17) 8x10 Torn and Frayed - The Choice of Sam and Dean  

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/40735606424/the-choice-of-sam-and-dean-spoilers-for-8x10 

18) 8x10 Torn and Frayed - Let’s Take a Moment for Sam

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/40781379927/lets-take-a-moment-for-sam-spoilers-for-8x10 

19) 8x11 LARP and the Real Girl - Charlie’s Relationship With Dean

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/41381955006/charlies-relationship-with-dean-spoilers-for 

20) A Friend for Sam - Musings on Character Development

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/42219949786/a-friend-for-sam-musings-on-character 

21) 8x13 Everybody Hates Hitler - Dean, Nazis and the Closet

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/42574075453/dean-nazis-and-the-closet-further-thoughts-on 

22) 8x13 Everybody Hates Hitler - The Golem as a Parallel Device

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/42745942537/the-golem-as-a-parallel-device-supernatural-8x13 

23) Dean’s Sexuality and Audience Interpretation

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/42790117441/deans-sexuality-and-audience-interpretation

24) The Sexual Politics of Audience Desire  (Supernatural and Fan-Fiction)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/42867211604/the-sexual-politics-of-audience-desire

25) 8x13 Everybody Hates Hitler - More Discussion on Dean, Nazis and the Closet (and some additional discussion on the closet in this episode with @mekbuda and @lookatthefreaking hipsters [now both deactivated])

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/42990052635/destiels-delight-dean-nazis-and-the-closet 

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/48276862638/aaron-bass-schr%C3%B6dingers-gay 

26) Dean as Nurturer: Mini Character Meta

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/43032313116/dean-as-nurturer-mini-character-meta

27)   Pick-Ups and Hook-Ups: Aaron, Ellie, Benny - Dean’s Supernatural Sexy-Times Meta (8x14 Trial and Error)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/43156477155/pick-ups-and-hook-ups-aaron-ellie-benny-deans

28) Commentary on Dean and “Mytharc”

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/43184426552/a-discussion-re-emergent-complexity-laura-prudom 

29) I Touch Myself: Musical Narrative Voice and Polysemy (8x14 Trial and Error)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/43252438290/i-touch-myself-musical-narrative-voice-and

30) “I’m Just Curious as to Which One You Consider Yourself, Mostly?” Dean Thinks it Through with Portia  (8x15 Man’s Best Friend With Benefits)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/43855179447/im-just-curious-as-to-which-one-you-consider 

31) Mytharc vs Heart-Arc: Dean as Medieval Romantic Hero

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/44110505167/mytharc-vs-heart-arc-dean-as-medieval 

and with additional commentary:

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/64143278936/get-the-saltenjoy-the-show-mytharc-vs

32) 8x17 Goodbye Stranger Dialogue Review

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/45888461261/supernatural-8x17-dialogue-review-spoilers 

33) Personal Queer Reflections on Shipping Dean and Cas, post 8x17 

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/45935841020/personal-queer-reflections-on-shipping-dean-and 

34) Bisexuality, Power Inequalities and the Difficulties of Representation - Destiel in 8x17 Goodbye Stranger

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/46012398416/bisexuality-power-inequalities-and-the 

35) “I’d Rather Have You, Cursed or Not”: Subtext, Mon Amour

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/46543190453/id-rather-have-you-cursed-or-not-subtext-mon 

36) Swing Low, Sweet Chariot - To Hell and Back - Taxi Driver, Cab Fare and Charon’s Boat  (18x19 Taxi Driver)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/47145558835/swing-low-sweet-chariot-to-hell-and-back-taxi 

37) Four Times Sam Was Challenged on not Searching for Dean

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/47233826179/four-times-sam-was-challenged-on-not-searching-for 

38) Killing Kitsune to Caressing Castiel: Dean’s Journey from his own Side of Monster 

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/48219811386/killing-kitsune-to-caressing-castiel-deans

39) Pac-Man Fever Calls Back Yellow Fever (8x20)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/48827322213/pac-man-fever-calls-back-yellow-fever-overcoming

40) Edlund’s Love Letter to Fan-Fiction in The Great Escapist (8x21) 

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/49413040878/edlunds-love-letter-to-fan-fiction-8x21

41) “Why Do People Always Think We’re Gay?” (8x21)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/49415068274/why-do-people-always-think-were-gay-8x21

42) Sam’s Mistaken Quest for “Purity” (8x21)

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/49468662684/flipse-it-doesnt-matter-anymore-because 

43) In Purgatory, The Heart is Purified for Heaven

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/49963611742/in-purgatory-the-heart-is-purified-for-heaven

44) “Of the Blessings Set Before You: Make Your Choice and Be Content” (8x23 Sacrifice)

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/50567052832/of-the-blessings-set-before-you-make-your-choice

45) Metatron’s Spell: The Ingredients (8x23)

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/50579065447/metatrons-spell-the-ingredients-spn-8x23-the

46) Naomi is a Bitch, Abaddon is a Whore - Can We Not? (8x23)

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/50599390401/naomi-is-a-bitch-abbadon-is-a-whore-can-we

47) Queer Angel Love in Metatron’s Spell (A Few Further Thoughts on 8x23)

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/50604693898/gay-angel-love-in-metatrons-spell-a-few-further

48) The Bar Scene in 8x23 - Detailed Analysis of LGBTQ “Lib” and “Lol” Moments

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/50661253249/the-bar-scene-in-8x23-spoilers-detailed

49) Supernatural Soap: Does Adding a Gay Writer Matter? (Berens Joins the Show)

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/58286938085/supernatural-soap-does-adding-a-gay-writer

50) The Gospel of Mary Winchester Still Needs to Be Written

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/60227577254/image-credit-fanpop-mary-winchester-burned-on 

51) Actual Crypt Scene vs Gag Reel Crypt Scene (8x17): That Which is Disavowed

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/60477660660/weird-little-angel-x-this-is-a-nice 

[dustydreamsanddirtyscars]

I don't blame you at all for keeping quiet about the show. I just can't understand how the people running the CW can look at what Dabb is doing to this show and go, "Eh - good enough." It's NOT good enough. It is demonstrably terrible, and at this point I desperately hope there will be a new show runner next season who will reveal the last 2 seasons were all a dream because one of the boys was in a coma. I don't know how else to fix things without acting like the Dabb era just didn't happen.

Not sure my ask went thru… What’s up Girly-girl! Long time no comment, edit, review, rant, observation, bitch session…  we miss you! You still watching? Curious as to what you think about theses past 5 episodes. Looks like Dabb in his ultimate suckitude as a Showrunner has screwed Jensen over again and handed off his DeanMichael storyline to another. Shocker. I’ll be really pissed if he has. And it definitely looks that way.             

Hello dear!

I assume these two might have been written by you? And probably some time ago as well. I’m sorry about replying so late, but tumblr hasn’t really been a prioriy these past months. Thank you for your message though. :) I think tumblr is working perfectly alright without me though, but thank you for being sweet and saying you missed my rambles.

That being said, I don’t think there will be any rambles, specs or metas posted on my page in any foreseeable future - though I could probably just schedule the around 200 meta-, gif- and edit-posts that are still sitting in my drafts, but then again… they have collected some dust by now.

To be completely honest, it’s a combination of things why I have been silent on here. One being that my daily life with work has been pretty demanding and doesn’t leave me with a whole lot of energy after I get home, but it’s also that I simply don’t have as much to say about SPN anymore these days.

I joined fandom in the middle of S7 and my personal highlight times on here has been from S8 to S11 - those were the good old days of meta, really they were golden and I cherish that time dearly still, but fandom has changed since then (and what people deem most important as well), the show has changed and I don’t feel like I am having a place in this fandom any longer. While I also always love editing, my primary focus on tumblr and with my blog has been analysis and meta and I feel like the kind of meta I strived for, loved reading and wrote myself theme wise is no longer of any interest to the majority of people - which doesn’t really bother me, I would continue to post my views regardless, but these past 3 seasons under Dabb’s reign have been hard on me. He turned the show into something I can barely recognize as the show I fell in love with. The storytelling is a mess and so much other stuff as well that I have been very vocal about up until a few months back, but I didn’t want to be just negative any longer so I took a break hoping that maybe SPN would inspire me again to write, but Dabb’s version of SPN is so shallow, so foreseeable from miles away that it has simply not been the case.

To put it plainly, Dabb has made me fall out of love with SPN these past 3 years as he turned it into a show that has nothing in common with the show I love. Of course all of our tastes differ, but my personal favourite seasons past Kripke were the Carver years as he imo knew how to craft story, craft emotion, craft characters and he knew how to play subtle, how to set up a story and follow through, how to make your heart ache in the best way possible. His style of storytelling and showrunning is what I adored and Dabb’s style has hardy anything in common with that so the past three years watching the show, seeing canon thrown out the window, replacing deep emotion with cheap melodrama and stories that built up and had a climax to millions of stories that go nowhere has left their mark on me. It’s been a tough three years, years that were frustrating, yes even painful, it was like a relationship that you always hoped would blossom again but never did. It’s like a relationship that had all the raw potential but ended up hurting you more than it made you happy.

Don’t get me wrong, I will always love this show and there will never be another show that will have this impact on me and my life and I can guarantee that there will NEVER be a character that will mean as much to me as Dean Winchester, but Dabb era has been painful, because I cared so much about the show. I was mourning it and it’s characters while they were still there on my screen but treated with such careless hands that I needed to take a step back and to be honest, I think it was the right call. For one because no one needs a negative voice all the time, but even more so now that J2M have revealed that S15 will be the last.

I see a lot of people very broken up about it and I’d have been the same way after S8 or 9 or 10 or 11 if it had ended then, right now I feel relief - and I don’t want to hurt anybody with saying that - and strangely enough for the first time in a while interest again (I have been watching the episodes btw, but like I said… nothing that would need to be written about - aside from Jensen rocking it with his Michael struggle, which like you said now has been given to someone else, once more) and a faint bit of hope and even happiness, because this way they should be able to craft an ending that is planned from the get-go. And that is something that could be very good for the storyline - then again, sadly I doubt that someone like Dabb could pull it all together. But here’s to hoping. All I want at this point is for them to make it count, make it worth it - I’d love nothing more than seeing the first episode of S15 and feeling like writing meta again.

So, what does it all add up to? I know this is a long ramble, but I felt it was overdue given my silence on here. I don’t know how often I’ll be on here from now on, I’ll check in here and there, but I doubt I’ll be posting much. To everybody who is hurting due to SPN coming to an end: HUGS. Really selfishly I can say I truly don’t hurt or feel broken up, I feel more like resolution is finally on the horizon and potential for a wonderful ending. And something that I will always be grateful for is the people this show has brought into my life, people who’ll stay in my life way past this show, that’s what makes the show count: just like the character will transcend, keep living, so will these friendships for life and that’s how this show will become “immortal”. Not through the storylines, not through the 15 seasons it aired, it had impact through and due to the people who watched it and who found like minded people through it they can consider close friends and even family now.

Anyway, if I could have one wish fulfilled, it would be to get all of the good writers back on the show for this last hurra, Ben Edlund, Jeremy Carver, Sera Gamble, Raelle Tucker, Robbie Thompson and Adam Glass for example and of course Eric Kripke. Let them pen the ending to the show that famously once said “endings are hard, but nothing ever truly ends, does it”. And yes, I still stand by my sceanrio that I have written about many a times before in terms of endings. I’d love it if the ending scene was a shot of the Impala on some stretch of the road (the brothers may have died fighting the good fight or finally retired or whatever else) and some guy who looks to be lost, but a good soul tries the door and it swings open. He sits down, rumages through the car to find the keys and finally looks into the glove compartment where a thick envelope sits that reads:

“For you”

And the guy picks me it up and opens it and inside there’s a leather journal, reminiscent of John’s but not his and a folded piece of paper and the keys to the Impala. And you can see in Dean’s handwriting there’s written:

“May she be as much of a home to you as she was for me and my brother. Treat her well, or I swear I’ll haunt your ass.”

And the guy laughs and turns on the ignition, “Back in Black” starts blasting from the radio so that he turns down the volume and fumbles for the journal, opens it up and looks at the first page that says:

“My name is Dean Winchesters. And then is my story. Buckle up.”

[theangelwhounderstood]

SPN questionaire

I was tagged by @hannah-deserved-better <3

***

1. When did you start watching Supernatural? I started, I think, as a junior in High School. I had a friend who obsessed over it literally all the time and I got tired of hearing about it and not understanding what she was talking about. It wasn’t until like a year later that I saw it on Netflix and figured I might as well. I guess that was my first mistake lol

2. Who is your favorite in TFW? Dean will forever be my favorite.

3. Who is your least favorite in TFW? In the beginning I wasn’t really much of a Castiel fan. I could take him or leave him in the first few episodes but he grew on me!

4. Tag your top 5 Supernatural blogs. I would rather not tag them just because that seems kinda like spam but if I’ve talked to you via instant message, then you’ve been chosen fam. Sorry I don’t make the rules lol

5. Who is your favorite character (not including TFW)? I have so many but I think it’s pretty clear I have a special place in my heart for Hannah. She’s amazing and really stood out to me.

6. Who is your favorite woman in Supernatural? Gonna have to go with Hannah again on that one!

7. John or Mary? John, for sure. I just don’t really enjoy Mary’s character for some reason and I can’t quite pinpoint why. 

8. What were your first opinions of Sam, Dean, Cas, and Jack?

Sam: I thought Sam was suuuper cute when I first saw him. He looked like the kinda guys I would like when I was in school lol. I thought the Jess thing was kinda boring though, not gonna lie.

Dean: Didn’t know that I was going to like him nearly as much as I do now! Jensen is an amazing actor and he’s one of the few that really pulls out my emotions when I watch. I can relate to him a lot and his humor is just as dry as mine.

Cas: Wasn’t really a fan until later on. I get that Cas is a huge fan favorite but I didn’t hope on to the Cas train until he became a regular. I wish they would show him more as a bad ass angel because he really is!

Jack: Two seconds of ‘oh crap I hate him’ and an eternity of ‘my smol sweet boi I will fight for you where are the adoption papers?’ 

9. What’s your favorite season? I don’t really have one. All of them have amazing episodes that play on different themes and I can’t decide!

10. What’s your least favorite season? Ugh. Season 10/11 with the Darkness was the wooooorst. Like, seriously? God’s sister? We’re going there?

11. Opinions on Destiel? The signs are all there let’s be real. Not obsessed but wouldn’t be opposed.

12. Do you believe Supernatural queerbaits? I think there are certain aspects of the show that kinda queerbait but I’m not sure it’s done on purpose.

13. Seasons 1-7 or 8-14? 1-7 was my JAM!

14. Favorite villain (plot wise)? I’m gonna go with Crowley just because he’s the most believable as a character to me.

15. Do you think they should end the Lucifer plot line? I mean, as long as Mark Pellegrino continues to play him, I am more than chill with the plot continuing. Mark is freaking gorgeous sooo.  

16. Who do you think has gone through more trauma (Sam, Dean, or Cas)? Considering Castiel literally has been alive for millennia? Castiel. Hands down.

17. What’s your favorite Supernatural episode? I don’t think I have one.

18. Do you like case episodes? I love them! They were what got me hooked in the first place! I’m not such a fan of them now only because they seem to be more filler than anything else but the original case episodes were amazing!

19. Who do you relate most to in TFW? Dean, for sure. I have a sibling as well and I’ve been told more than once that I’m a mom friend. I also have a friend that literally calls me ‘Dean’ to the absolute confusion to everyone around us because of our similar qualities. My contact in her phone is ‘Dean Winchester’.

20. Why do you like Supernatural? The story and the people I’ve met along the way. I love the brotherly dynamic between Sam and Dean and the lore is so interesting. Myths, legends, and folklore always fascinated me, so to add a plot to that which is well rounded and developed just hooked me from episode one. I actually met two of my three best friends because of our shared interests of the show! 

21. If you could bring back one character and kill off another who would they be? I want to brink back so many it’s not even funny. Let’s just say almost all the angels minus Zachariah, Uriel, and Anna.

*I tag whoever would like to do this!*

[amwritingmeta]

SNAPSHOT META: 1x01 - PILOT

I’m rewatching the entire series over the summer - not only because my memory bank is in dire need of refreshing, but because what else are we supposed to do during hellatus? Meet up with friends, go to the park, enjoy the sunshine? *snorts with derision* (okay I’ll be doing that too) (I’m not staying in all summer watching SPN and writing meta) (*shiftiest eyes*) I wanted to do this as part of this awesomeness and will attempt to catch up. If I can’t: *shrug* What can I say? Real Life and all that. Yes, friends in the park with sunshine. (be honest) I work. A lot. Of the hours.

But to make it up to you, I’ve planned THIS

No, I’m not going to dress up as Marilyn Monroe and come to your house and shower you with champagne. (or am I?)  No, don’t be silly - I can’t do that! Instead, I’m going to encourage you all to drink! By introducing the Spectacular and Penultimate and so very Necessary Drinking Game. (*SPNDG for short) For those who do not partake of the alcohol or for those of you who are underage there will be soda pops involved. (considering how much I curse I sincerely hope each and every one of you are of age)

You with me here? AWESOME! This will be us come end of summer:

Though possibly not quite so fishy... Either way, we’ll be ready for S13, peeps!

So, I had this ambition to do this Snapshot Commentary thing for each episode, getting through one or two a day. This post has taken me four days, the hours I’ve had to invest interspersed unevenly at best, and @margarittet was nice enough to do the maths - my ambition would take me over two years to fulfil at this pace. Yah. And as I lack a Time-Turner (god I wish I had one WHY JK ROWLING??) I may just have to watch the series as planned and write meta on the episodes that stand out as deeper narrative beats, both plot and character wise. Fuck. I already know there are so many of them. But I’m excited to get started! Writing this meta has been so much fun and I hope you’ll enjoy it.

I know I’m probably repeating stuff someone else has already said, but do you know what, I haven’t gotten to say it, so I’m saying it for myself now. Keep a lookout for them drinking prompts, because that means fun times up ahead, and don’t forget to drink responsibly. (remember nesnej) (oh god we’re all gonna get sloshed) (or very, very high on sugar)

Here we go!

Snapshot Commentary: 1x01 - PILOT

Mary and John are Good Parents

Sam is the cutest baby e.v.e.r

Young Dean worships his father already 

Flickering lights are always sinister

Baby monitors are always freaky

Guys standing ominously in shadow are super-disconcerting 

MARY, THAT WAS NOT JOHN!

Oh, the pain of that fiery death is just… no

And, of course, Dean is handed Sammy to look after and to save —- *ow*

“It’s okay, Sammy.” —- *ow*

Why did little baby Sammy have to see his mother burn on the ceiling?? —- *OW*

Jessica is a beautiful girl

Jessica needs to wear more clothes

I worry Jessica may catch cold 

Lightly Clad Female adulation: *Tequila Time

Sam is gorgeous

Sam doesn’t buy into Halloween

Sam is smart as all fuck

Sam isn’t close to his family

Jess is his family: she believes in him, encourages him, is proud of non-hunter him

The character intro of Dean fucking Winchester: an Intruder Cloaked in Shadow (friend or foe, we don’t know - remind you of anyone?) 

Them boys got them fighting skills down

*no. 1 - BEER

Jessica is a beautiful girl

Jessica needs to wear more clothes

I worry Jessica may catch cold

*no. 2 - Ladies Man Dean switching on the skeeze charm

There’s good reason to be afraid of the dark

Them boys hunt them things that there’s good reason to be afraid of

Them boys kill them things and save lives

Dean takes pride in this - Sam is trying to move on from it: root of brotherly conflict revealed and we are at minute 8:55, peeps

Dean: So what’re you gonna do? You just gonna live some normal, apple pie life, is that it?

Wait, what? Pie is synonymous with what?

*no. 3 - PIE

Sam: No. Not normal - safe.

Dean manipulates Sam reaches out because he does not want to do this alone, even though Sam more or less just told him that all he wants to be is safe from all of it: dick move, Dean - but then, without it, there’d be no story

Sam gives in — brodependency already in full swing

Baby <3

*no. 4 - Impala Weapons Stash

Sam is incredulous that Dean got to go on a hunting trip alone, which tells us John was always an Overbearing Parent, but…

Dean points out he’s twenty-six - an adult, meaning John trusts him to take care of himself

Conversely: in the original pilot script “Jack” (John’s original name was Jack) (yeah, I know, right?) makes a distinct, but brief, difference between his two sons: Baby Sam can have Dean’s room if baby Sam sleeps through the night. This may be an innocent promise, but it’s still telling of what John’s relationship with his boys was always meant to be. Sam is more important and Dean is left to fend for Sam, and to fend for himself.

Headcanon -> John was only overbearing for as long as Sam was still there. When Sam chose to leave, John started splitting up from Dean for longer and longer stints of time, leaving Dean to truly fend for himself. Dean is telling Sam the truth: he doesn’t want to do this alone anymore, he’s been completely alone from the day Sam left and Dean is a pack animal, someone for whom family is everything, it’s what’s been drilled into him since he was four years old and probably before then. Who is he if he’s not taking care of Sammy? For two years, no, for longer than that, he’s been trying to find out and he’s come up short. Bottom line? Dean Winchester is lonely and he misses his brother, misses the purpose he always gave him, craves that purpose like a drug. Without Sammy - Dean is lost, because all his life all he’s ever tried to be was John Winchester, so that he’d be strong enough to keep Sam safe, and keeping Sam safe meant that perhaps their dad would be proud of him, but without Sam, modelling himself on John loses its meaning, and if he’s not emulating John Winchester, then who is he supposed to be? He doesn’t know. And, quite possibly, the thought of finding out feels like a complete betrayal of everything his father ever taught him. Because you never give up on family, and that has always been a double-edged sword.

Minute 12:53

Jericho, California

I can never go home…… *chills*

Jessica is a beautiful girl

Jessica needs to wear more clothes

I worry Jessica may catch cold

Hottest Woman in White ever - them victims never stood a damn chance - maybe if you didn’t throw yourself at men with wives and girlfriends, Hotness, they wouldn’t be tempted to cheat *eye roll* (female representation too often sucks)

Friendly Reminder: Lightly Clad Female adulation means fucking *Tequila Time, y’all

Sidenote: as much as I love how this episode is resolved, I do find that there’s a big gaping logic hole in this antagonist’s motivation when the Woman in White is killing men because her husband was unfaithful, and yet she is clearly not averse to literally forcing her victims into a compromised position, in essence she’s raping them before killing them. She’s a vengeful spirit and she’s seeing red, meaning she can’t actually weigh the good and bad in her decisions, and I get that, but seriously? She’s killed ten men over twenty years. Why not more? Why not only target those that are up for it by their own volition then, if you’re going to be so damn picky? Meh. Whatever.

Minute 18:21

*No. 5 - Every time they say the word “agent” have a drink of water (I’m not a sadist) (well I am a little) (like Misha Collins) (so there’s a bit of goodness) (to my badness) (water is life) (and helps against massive hangovers) 

Dean doesn’t have a whole lotta respect for the lawmen 

(Jensen has the biggest, greenest eyes)

Sam is empathic - in touch with his emotions

Empathy makes Dean fidget - out of touch with his emotions or, you know, unwilling to touch them

Constance Welch - Hottest Woman in White Ever has a name, glory be!

Please hold for some Dialogue Deconstruction…

Here’s the Bridge Exchange between the brothers:

Sam: Dean, I told you, I’ve gotta get back by— Dean: Monday. Right. The interview. Sam: Yeah. Dean: You’re really serious about this, aren’t you? You think you’re just gonna become some lawyer? Marry a girl… Sam: Maybe. Why not? Dean: Does Jessica know the truth about you? I mean, does she know about the things you’ve done? Sam: No, and she’s not ever going to know. Dean: Well, that’s healthy. You can pretend all you want, Sammy, but sooner or later you’re going to have to face up to who you really are. Sam: And who’s that? Dean: You’re one of us. Sam: No. I’m not like you. This is not going to be my life. Dean: You have a responsibility. Sam: To dad? And his crusade? If it weren’t for pictures I wouldn’t even know what mom looks like. What difference would it make? Even if we were to find the thing that killed her, mom’s gone, and she’s not coming back. Dean: Don’t talk about her like that.

This exchange tells us so much about these two men, their past, their present frame of mind, stating the conflict in their different points of views. Oh, my Kripke. *salivating*

Dean

thinks a normal life is a pipe dream

which is confirmed as the truth by Sam finding it necessary to lie to Jessica

leading to Dean calling Sam out on the unhealthiness of denying who you really are (!!!)

Now for the underlying conflict this exchange highlights: Dean needs his brother back in the family business. His face when he tries to throw the responsibility barb at Sam and Sam shakes it off - Dean looks hurt, he was speaking for himself here, not John and as we’ll learn, Dean practically raised Sam, so for Sam to find it so easy to leave him behind, to not even take him into account, it must hurt like all hell

Dean is protective of Mary’s memory: whether it’s out of loyalty to her or loyalty to John is hard to tell at this point, right? Mary’s memory has shaped Dean’s life, and of course he has his own memories of her, but is he protective of her as his mother or as the motor behind his entire existence, which Sam is more or less calling bullshit on here? Maybe it’s both. Maybe they’re irrevocably the same at this point. 

Dean is a foot soldier: he’s had his reason for existing drilled into him from when he was old enough to have it drilled into him that this is who he is and this is all there is to him, there is no questioning orders, there is no breaking away from it, there is nothing else out there more important than family

Dean is loyal and duty bound, displaying a softly selfish streak as he pulls Sam back into the life, as well as giving us hints of that deep insecurity when it comes to his own identity, an insecurity that we’ll get to know so well over the seasons (remind you of anyone?)

Lets’ look at the exchange again, this time from Sam’s POV:

Sam

that “maybe” denotes a hint of uncertainty 

that turns into defensiveness

because deep down he’s afraid that Dean’s right and there’s no “normal” to be had for him

and, as with most things, a twofold: we’re heading into dark territory with Sam and this uncertainty is subtle foreshadowing of how he’s always felt different and out of place

but as we’ll come to learn about Sam, once he stops beating against the hunter side of himself, he’ll find his MoL side, his Leader side, and that journey starts right here as well, in this subtle show of uncertainty, because what Sam truly needs ain’t ever going to be “normal”

it’s funny when Sam tells Dean he’s nothing like him, because the truth is: Sam beat Dean in that first scuffle, Sam found the name of the Woman in White, Sam picked the lock at the motel, Sam concluded John’s in trouble by examining the room, Sam got Dean out of jail by placing a prank call and, of course, Sam’s going to resolve the episode by taking action

so obviously Sam is a hunter to the bone - and he’s better at it than Dean

it’s lovely that Sam immediately ties John’s hunt for Mary’s killer to Christianity by dubbing it a “crusade” - very subtle foreshadowing here

Sam is so over all of it: he is all about free will and his right to exorcise it, not buying into the crap John is selling, not seeing the point, if there ever was one - it won’t bring their mother back, she’s gone, they need to move on with their lives

as he says to Dean in their earlier exchange: Mary wouldn’t have wanted this for them, and of course we know Sam’s right in this assumption

but that said, Sam also has loyalty and a sense of duty, rooted in love for his family, and though he knows who he wants to be, there’s a clear insecurity about who he can be 

he’s just not ready to sacrifice his sense of self for someone else’s idea of what is the right thing to do with his life

It’s the classic Hero’s Journey setup for Sam, of course: without resistance there’s no possibility for growth. If the Hero begins in a place where he’s comfortable with the journey he’s about to be launched onto then the necessity for him making the journey disappears and there’s no hook into the narrative. (remind you of anyone?)

Minute 24:43

Jump up on the railing, boys. The railing. THE RAILING, BOYS, THE CAR CAN’T GET TO YOU IF YOU’RE… oh, forget it.

Even covered in mud you are one hot cookie, Dean Winchester

John Winchester is a pro

John Winchester is detail oriented (MoL)

John Winchester is clever

John Winchester is in trouble (stakes raised)

Sam apologises for what he said about John and Mary and Dean deflects the sentiment with a “Hey, no chick flick moments” — *awww*

*No. 6 - whenever Dean DEFLECTS SENTIMENT we toast each other with a RAWR

*No. 7 - whenever Sam tries to get Dean to talk we toast the TV with a JERK! BITCH!

On Dean Donning John’s Leather Jacket: I reblogged some gorgeous meta just the other day on this topic and couldn’t add my own thoughts because I simply didn’t have enough of an opinion. @dustydreamsanddirtyscars I still feel your meta was beautiful and that’s why I wanted it on my blog *head still bowed to you*, I also see how Dean is drowning in that jacket and all it symbolises, but I will agree with @elizabethrobertajones, who pointed out that the jacket is a visual metaphor for Dean shouldering responsibility for the family business, and I’d even like to delve a little deeper into what the jacket represents for me in this moment in time.

Firstly, I’d just like to point out how utterly downplayed this moment is in the pilot. If I hadn’t been aware of the jacket being John’s I wouldn’t even have registered how significant Dean sliding it on actually is, given how the episode plays out. We’re at minute 28:44 and the fact that there’s a ring of salt on the floor of John’s motel room has told the boys that John was worried, that he was trying to keep something out. The possibility of something truly bad having happened to their father is beginning to seem more and more likely to the brothers.

But, secondly, what is so interesting about Dean grabbing his father’s jacket is that he does it casually, without a second thought. It tells us John clearly wouldn’t mind Dean wearing his jacket, or Dean would have left it where it is. To me, this shows a bond. (As does the fact that John has given Dean his car, but that’s for later meta.) It shows a closeness between father and son because they’ve been united in their hunt for Mary’s killer and Dean has earned his father’s respect and trust, no matter how absent John is in Dean’s life. What Dean needs is his father’s love and acceptance and, of course, these he can’t ever have because Dean isn’t comfortable enough in himself to ever admit this is what he needs. And if he can’t admit it, then how can he ask for it?

So Dean dresses himself in his father’s clothes and steeps himself in his father’s image (down to driving his car and listening to his music) in order to connect with his father, because regular Dean has never been quite enough. And, furthermore, Dean emulates his father in order for Dean to do his duty, to be the responsible one, to look out for Sammy. It’s what he’s been doing for twenty-two years so donning his father’s jacket in this scene is casual because it’s what Dean does every day of his life, it’s who he already is - an extension of John Winchester.

It’s why the significance of this moment is downplayed, rather than acting as foreshadowing for what’s to happen to Jessica in ten minutes by underlining the fact that something bad must’ve happened to John - because this isn’t what this moment is there for, it’s simply an extremely subtle way of planting the visual information of how Dean is already a shadow of his father.

Note: they begin putting deeply emotional and key character moments entirely in visual subtext from day one. This is how they write this show and how they have always written this show. Because they are amazing writers and this is how amazing writers write shit down. A good screenplay needs to work on multiple levels and deliver on this type of thing in every scene, because each scene is meant to be a building block for the narrative and the foundation for the narrative is subtext.

Writing a good screenplay is not easy or straight forward, it takes a lot of consideration for what details actually matter to the narrative as a whole and that consideration is always based in knowledge of your character’s backstory and, preferably, at least some notion of their endgame. Though endgames change and aren’t an absolute necessity, I’d say it’s very difficult to steer a narrative without even a loose destination in mind.

And look at how the brother’s are set up in the pilot: this is the relationship we’re going to follow for the coming twelve years, and the core conflict is right there, in their first scene, enhanced in this exchange I’ve just briefly deconstructed. It is meticulously crafted writing. (I just cannot EVEN)

Minute 29:40

Dean gets bent over the hood of a car and yeah, he likes it - there is no reason for him to like it that much, except for this actually being one of those downplayed visual character moments that would give the casual viewer insight into Dean enjoying being bent over things by men in uniform, if it wasn’t so ambiguous (we know though) (we know) (the foreshadowing for Dean’s bisexuality, and him being privately ok with it, too - look at that smile - is starting right here, guys) (IN THE PILOT)

So Dean previously dissed the cops for not having a clue

Now he’s their only clue to solving the murder

This leads Dean to the biggest clue he’s found in his John Winchester investigation

John Winchester’s JOURNAL (god that’s a great visual) (you can hear the weight of this revelation as the journal hits that table like a brick) (I wish I had a GIF)

Thank you, @elizabethrobertajones!! 

(I wish I had a million dollars)

Now, Dean dissing the cops when he and Sam first arrive on the crime scene and actually  being proven wrong - because these cops clearly have eyes and ears on alert - is good, this tells us Dean’s not as slick as he thinks he is

Sam being the empath again - gently interrogating Constance Welch’s husband

until he switches on the badass - because Sam is not beyond pushing for the truth and pushing buttons to get to it: logic and gut instinct stemming from emotional intelligence, I would argue, because Sam has always been honest with himself and tried his hardest to follow his heart

the fact that Dean so easily slips out of the station WITH THE JOURNAL reaffirms the fact that Dean is good at what he does - granted with assistance from Sam: this instils in us the confidence that Dean knows what he’s doing, getting himself out of the jam he got himself into (possibly this was an unintentionally planted soundbite, but the Getting Themselves Out of Jams They’ve Unintentionally Created For Themselves still hits a note that will echo through the entire series)

John’s left Jericho and he didn’t take his journal (the plot thickens)

SHIT THERE’S A GHOST LADY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD SAMMY!!

And now she’s IN THE CAR WITH YOU SAMMY!! (stakes raised sky high) (she gonna kill you!) (don’t say oh hell yes!) 

Ok, good, there’s that cleverness I’ve come to know and love, Sam, good boy for telling her no, but of course, it’ll make no difference whatsoever because this ghost will violently murder you for getting excited by her cleavage and her grinding against your groin (but it really is ridiculous, though) (isn’t it?) (she’s afraid to go home, guys) (that’s her weak spot) (the only reason she switches on the seductress and Sam suddenly having no say in the matter is that they wanted Dean to fire that shotgun) (they wanted to show that there is more ways than one to beat back the supernatural on this show) (“I can’t ever go home” makes logical Sam understand her fear) (so Constance realising what he’s going to do - that he’s going to take her home - could’ve made her fight back) (in the way she took control of the car on the bridge) (which would take us to the need to use that shotgun) (there’s no damn reason for her to try and coerce Sam into being unfaithful) (it just negates her entire backstory - her believable and emotional motivation) (I like my Hottest Women in White evers to be well-rounded characters) (thank you very much)

(yes thank you) (this pilot has given insight) (with logic holes)

Again - I love this episode resolution: you go Sam! and then the water and, oh man —

— children in shadow at the top of stairs shot with a low angle are always creepy

Bye bye Constance (toilet flush noise) (hmm)

“--I’ll kill you” = Baby Love

Blackwater Ridge, Colorado

Oh, disappointment from Dean: Sam’s still not coming with him to meet up with John and make sure he’s ok

AC/DC singing “I’m on a Highway to Hell” as Dean pulls up to Sam’s door to drop him off - holy shit this show really does choose its music with care

Helluva team *chills*

Oh, cookies

Bookend to end all bookends

“We’ve got work to do.” *double-chills*

And what’s even more significant here is Sam’s character arc for this episode bookending as he’s spent the entire narrative beating against everything his father stands for to now - without hesitation, the love of his life having just died in the exact same way the love of his father’s life died - be stepping into the very shoes he’s always rejected, ready to walk that path of vengeance for Jessica’s sake.

Dean donned John’s jacket.

Sam, starting out stating how what he wants out of life is safety with/for the woman he loves, ends up picking up a shotgun.

Their fates and their choices are linked to and mirrored in John’s fate and his choices and the basis for all that’s to come is firmly in place by the end of this pilot episode. Isn’t it just marvellous?

Other Noteworthy Things:

Dean indulges in unhealthy food twice

Sam declines unhealthy food twice 

Dean says “house rules” about what goes on in the Impala and I have so many thoughts on what Baby symbolises, but “stability” and “home” are the foremost ones, so this brief line feels meaningful to me

A diner ->

A gas station ->

A motel ->

-> Settings we will become very familiar with

Cassette tapes (twelve years of cassette tapes)

Dean calls Sam out for being a control freak 

Let’s bask in the gorgeous irony Kripke establishes by making it clear that being a hunter means having to break the law and Sam’s ambition in life is to be a lawyer - it underscores the internal conflict so beautifully and underlines how Sam’s vision for his future truly is the absolute Opposite to how he’s been raised

Sam needing to distance himself from his family means he’s not welcome back

This was John’s decision

Headcanon: thinking how this most probably devastated Dean, but Sam figured Dean would stick by John without hesitation so he never bothered to contact Dean, while Dean, not hearing from Sam, figured Sam wouldn’t want him to bother him *slow tear*

And that is all from me on this gorgeous episode, peeps! Hope you found this informative!!

xx

[orionsangel86]

I dont think they'll kill Sam and Dean off for financial reasons. The show had a lot of talk about planning a supernatural movie after the show is done and also tried to launch a spin-off once already they are going to want them for these plans, or at least the possiblity for it. If they kill them and everyone else SPN is dead truely, closure included you cant sell stuff on that like with the feeling of being able to rejoin Sam and Dean anytime any plans etc over i dont think that

Hmmm... okay so valid point, if they will actually go there... I dunno if they will, If SPN ends with Sam and Dean just driving off in the impala I will honestly feel a bit cheated, because it will mean no development in all 13+seasons. Bibros will love that of course, but I think it would be a massive anticlimax. 

The way I see it, SPN had two possible endings:

1. They all die in a blaze of glory, just like Dean always says and the ending that we KNOW Jared and Jensen and Misha all want. None of them see a happy ending for the show, they all think that the characters will die for the world. This ending makes sense considering the song of the show is “carry on wayward son” and really, that song is all about death isn’t it? We could STILL have destiel in this ending, and have them all reunited with those they love in heaven, it could be tragic but still hopeful and happy in a way. Like they all end up sitting around the bar in the roadhouse and all the old characters come back and yeah, maybe Dean will smile at Sam as he is reunited with Eileen (or even Jess?!) and gives her a kiss, and then Cas walks up to Dean and stands by his side, they smile at each other and all the happy faces all around them and then Dean takes Cas’s hand and thats that. End scene.

It is an option that will actually be incredibly bittersweet. Something like the Wayward Daughters spin off could still go on but the original cast wouldn’t be able to do one off episodes with them. But then would they really need to? Wayward Daughters doesn’t need Sam and Dean and Cas paying a visit every now and again to be successful. It will have Jody and Donna and Claire and maybe even Rowena could be like a Crowley character... I don’t think a movie is a good idea personally... I get flashbacks to the X Files movie and well, I wouldn’t want it to tank. 

2. We are still going for Dabb’s happy endgame idea. Who knows, maybe they will bring Eileen back? I was wondering if maybe that mystery character from the promo is the Nephilim baby from the future? Maybe he’s all grown up and tries to convince them all to let him live and gives them each a gift and the gift he gives Sam is Eileens life back? Who fucking knows eh? 

if the endgame is still happy, then it will have to be something to do with the boys not quite leaving hunting, but settling into a Bobby type role and also training up the next generation of hunters. Sam would rebuild the global men of letters from scratch (since the Brits will probably be in ruins by the finale) and recruit people from all over the world to watch over the Supernatural and start a global organisation of worldwide protection. Perhaps the final season will actually be about the world becoming aware of the SPN?! Sam would control that (a true man of letters) WITH A FUCKING DOG! and Dean and Cas would still travel, go hunting together (Cas would be human) and yeah, I can see that happening I suppose but it doesn’t make sense to not give Sam SOMEONE outside of his brother and Cas.

The reason that this option doesn’t seem so likely to me now is that they were BUILDING on Sam’s endgame in the subtext for two seasons!! His dreams of ‘someone’, his saving of the retirement leaflet in his keepsake box, his questioning of who he is and what he wants now. (he never managed to convince me that the hunter life is what he WANTS even if he has accepted it). Eileen was a big part of that... so I just don’t get it? It really confuses me that they killed her when she seemed like someone who could be so important for the future and for the endgame?! Could so many of us meta writers have been wrong about Eileen’s role? To me, it feels like a massive wasted potential and now I’m just completely lost for this endgame idea.

Perhaps the true endgame is a mixture of both of these? Could one brother live and the other die? Could that be the true endgame? Sam accepting his fate and sacrificing himself for the world in a repeat of Swan Song but this time he goes to heaven and reunites with those he loves, but the codependency is broken and Dean accepts his brothers death for real, and in his place gets a human Cas? (that would certainly be controversial to certain darker sides of fandom...)

Honestly I just don’t know. I’m upset that Sam’s friend had to die. Because she was SAM’S friend. One of the only friends he has outside of Dean, or who Dean hasn’t connected with more than him. Even if it was completely platonic between them, its still really annoying that Sam had that taken from him. He never gets to bond with anyone outside of Dean. 

*sigh* I’m so tired nonny. I don’t think I could deal with a movie or it dragging on for another so many seasons. I WANT it to end at the moment, I am sick of seeing these characters suffer. If you keep adding more hurt to the mix without any comfort the audience eventually gets bored. SPN is becoming too painful to watch right now. 

Who knows how it will end really? Or when. So long as it does end and so long as the characters get the ending they deserve, an ending that is satisfying and beautiful and makes sense according to the story so far. Anything less would just feel cheap and broken.

[ms-michellewinchester]

Supernatural survey

I wasn’t tagged but this looks amazing, so I’m doing it anyway. However, I found it at  @holy-fucking-damn-shit blog.

1. What season did you start watching Supernatural? Season 1. I started from the beginning if that’s what you’re asking :). But if the question is meant in the sense what year I started watching, then the show was at its ninth season. It was about two or three weeks before the finale. I remember everyone was talking about how the season might end, because Jensen teased something about it being an eye-opener :D.

2. Who was the first character you fell in love with? Dean, always. My initial love for him, was really all about how snarky and fun he was. But as the character developed I really fell in love with how layered he was. How he has this mask that is made so obvious and talked about clearly on the show, but whatever’s underneath it you get between the lines, through showing. How on the surface you get “Sam is the smart one” but you are shown hints that Dean is a genius. You will get “Sam is more open to his emotions”, but you are shown that it’s Dean who makes emotionally based decisions, while Sam goes for (often) cold logic. And sadly, you will also get “Dean’s decisions are dumb and should be disregarded because they are emotionally based” but a lot of the timeit turns out that Dean was right all along (example: when Cas was possesed by Lucifer, Dean’s focus was on that, while Sam insisted, Amara was a bigger problem. Turned out Lucifer was the bigger problem in the end).

3. Who was a character that you hated at first but grew to love?: Crowley. Even though it was really up and down with him. It kind of depended on whether or not he was on the Winchester’s side - or worked with them, because, really, Crowley was always only on his own side. I don’t think I ever truly loved him, but I enjoyed his character, definitely.

4. Which character would you most want to be in a long-term relationship with? Um. This one is tough, because realisticaly, I don’t really see myself dating any of the characters. I would love to say Dean, but I would probably just keep on shipping him with Cas even in real time, so I wouldn’t date him. If I look at people I date in real life, Charlie would be the closest one. Dean is very close as well, but like I said, I would just play matchmaker for him :D.

5. If you could go on a date with just one character, which one would you choose?: Despite what I just said, I would choose Dean for that date, because I would love to talk to him and chances are that date would end with an awesome night :D. I’m not really one for one-night stands normally, but in this case I wouldn’t be able to resist.

6. What would you do on that date? I would love to chill out at the bunker. Dean would make dinner and we’d watch some TV and talk. And then end up in his room. Obviously this points towards us being friends for a while before deciding to just make a one time thing out of that, to relieve some stress :). Since I’m demi, I would definitely have to be close friends with him first for that scenario to work.

7. Which character would you most want to be like?: If we’re only talking about their character and not their experience (because I wouldn’t want to go through that), I would probably go for Dean. His character resonates with me and he makes me want to be a better person. And to have his confidence and empathy whe it comes to dealing with other people, that would be a gift.

8. Which character would you most want to see brought back from the dead?: Most of all Charlie, I think. Just because that was seriously messed up. Gabriel is another big name that comes to mind. Bobby is kind of a given. But I would also love to see Victor Henriksen again! And maybe Henry, even though I felt like his story was wrapped up nicely, it was just so short.

9. Which character would you most like to punch?: Lucifer. Always. He’s pure chaotic evil.

10. Who is your absolute favorite character?: Dean always had the top spot. Cas is a close second, but no one can take Dean’s spot in my heart.

11. Which “Big Bad” do you think was the worst?: The worst in the sense of writing, worst in the sense of how much I hated them or worst in how scary they were? In the sense of writing and storytelling, The Leviathan were absolute bullshit, excuse my French. Just no. In the sense of my hate for them, Lucifer wins. He’s a great villain in that sense. But damn, I hate him so much. And Cas was kind of seriously scary as the Big Bad (if you can count that, because technically, it was supposed to be Raphael and then the Leviathan, but it was really Cas), because that one was paved with good intentions. Lucifer is the villain that is just too evil for me to connect with and to really get him. He’s like Voldemort. Cas was probably scarier for that short period of time, because I understood his motivations even if I didn’t agree with his choices. He was like Zobrist in Brown’s Inferno (which was honestly the only good thing about that book).

12. Which character are you most like?: Wow, that one’s tough. The characters on the show have such different experiences from me that I have hard time separating that from who they are. I suppose I am a lot like Dean in some cases. I like to put up a front and hide my feelings from people around me, because I am very private with them and I don’t want to bother anyone with them. I’m a nerd who finds joy in being a fan of something, though I don’t hide that like Dean, so in that sense I’m more like Charlie. Like Dean, I rely on my feelings and my gut when it comes to decisions and when I screw something up I can drive myself crazy with guilt. Like Cas, I’m curious about things and I sometimes struggle to show how much I care. There’s so many different things, but I would say, even though we are very different in some aspect, I might be the closest to Dean.

13. What death hit you the hardest? Maybe when Sam died for the first time, just because it was really the first big one and I didn’t really know how the show worked. And also because his death was followed with so many awful things. Dean’s first death (like complete death in No Rest for the Wicked) was a tough one too. Charlie too, but I’m still kind of in denial about that one. And I suppose season 12 finale, even though I knew even in that second that this is not the end. I’m still worried about how that character will come back though. Will they be the same? 14. What season finale hit you the hardest?: Alpha and Omega. It was such a different finale from all the other ones that it stands above all the other ones. Even if it wasn’t devastating like other finales, or maybe because of that, it’s message got under my skin.

15. What are your ten all-time favorite episodes?: Lazarus Rising (Castiel and new Ruby), Reichenbach (Deanmon. Just. This. Fucking. Episode.), Don’t Call me Shurley (I can’t believe they went there), Alpha and Omega (best finale of ever), Angel Heart (Dean and Claire coming to terms, Cas and Claire coming to terms, Amelia and Jimmy getting a closure), The Monster at the End of This Book (Chuck!!!), Changing Channels (Gabriel and all the shade thrown here), Celebrating the Life of Asa Fox (Dean and Sam being legends, the twins), Fanfiction (I can’t even), Tall Tales (Gabriel! Also, some of the most absurd quotes ever), Everybody Hates Hitler (the Bunker!!!). That’s eleven. Because it’s impossible to choose just ten. It’s impossible to choose eleven too, but I managed to stop myself there :D.

16. What’s been your favorite season?: I can’t. Dammit. No. Right now it would probably be season 11 if they cut some of the fucking useless stuff in 11x21 and 11x22. There were some very importants scenes there, but a lot of this was just there to fill the space between 11x20 and 11x23. Though, considering 11x20 and 11x23 were some of the best episodes of the show in my eyes, it might be one of the reasons why the two episodes between just seemed so weak in comparison.

17. Who is your favorite angel? Is that even a question. I love Cas!

18. Who is your favorite demon? The two demons that were supposed to follow Crowley at the beginning of season 12 were pretty hillarious :D. But seriously, I would probably say Crowley. Even if not always. Meg had her moments as well.

19. Who’s your favorite evil character? Again, I might say Crowley and Meg, I guess. I would say Amara, but she was more neutral than evil. Rowena had a lot of great moments too. Oh, and Don and Maggie Stark were awesome and I want them to come back!

20. Do you have any Supernatural ships?: I’m Destiel trash if there ever was one. I have a lot of smaller ships that don’t really have that much impact on me, but I like the idea of them: Sam and Eileen, Don and Maggie, Henry and Josie (though I know it wasn’t like that). I read some Sabriel occasionally and I have some kind of weird thing for Dean/Cas/Meg which I honestly don’t understand.

21. Who’s your favorite supporting actor?: I would have to write a really long list for this one. Just on top of my head: Rob, Richard, Matt, Kim, Kathryn Newton, Emily Swallow, Gil McKinney, Osric Chau. Kid, honestly, I could go on and on... :D

22. What’s your favorite quote from the show?: Dean’s speech to Chuck comes to mind: “People...people pray to you, people build churches for you and fight wars in your name... And you did nothing.”

And Cas’ heartbreaking speech: “Knowing you has been the best part of my life. The things we’ve shared togehter..they have changed me. You’re my family. I love you. I love all of you.”

And Dean and Claire in Angel Heart. I just loved the scenes in the motel room and when they were playing mini golf. It’s not really a quote, just the conversations between them are gold.

23. If you could cast one famous actor in an episode of SPN, who would you choose? Maybe Emilia Clarke? I don’t really know. But I feel like she could be a badass hunter or just someone who had their life disrupter by supernatural activity, but she has like this no nonesense attitude about it. Or she could be another British woman of letters.

24. If you could write your own episode, what kind of creatures would you like to see included?: I don’t know about creatures, but I would love to see Virgin Mary as a character and bring Gabriel back just to see those two interacting :D. Oh, also, this is not my idea, but @northern-sparrow has these awesome creatures called elementals in her fics Forgotten and Flight and that’s such an amazing idea I want to see that on Spn.

25. Who’s your favorite girl that Dean’s hooked up with?: I guess it would be Lisa. Even if I couldn’t really see them together long-term, she really cared about him and tried to be what he needed.

26. Who’s your favorite girl that Sam’s hooked up with?: Ha! I will say Genevieve Padalecki. Because they did hook up in French mistake, didn’t they! :D Part of me wanted to say Ruby, because even if she was evil and seduced him into screwing everything up, she was honestly a really good character.

27. What are some of your favorite convention moments?: Pretty much any Cockles panel ever :D. Jensen reading Misha’s resume, the thing with the white bunny and so on. And as far as my own experiences go, meeting Jensen was pretty great and also having an actual conversation with Misha about books.

28. If you were going to guest star (or be a recurring guest star) on SPN, how would you want your character to be described?: Maybe a university professor who specializes in mythilogy and becomes kind of a new Bobby? Or an angel who starts helping the Winchesters.

29. What do you hope to see in the next season?: Cas coming back as HIMSELF and not some alternate reality Cas. Sam listening to Dean for once. Rowena coming back. No more deaths for shock value. Some interesting monsters of the week.

30. - 40. If you had to choose…

Bobby or John?: Bobby.

Bela or Ruby? Ruby.

Jess or Madison?: Probably Jess, but I don’t really know with this one.

Jo or Lisa?: That’s tough. Maybe Jo, but it’s close.

Charlie or Kevin? Almost impossible, but at gun point I’d choose Charlie.

Balthazar or Ash?: Balthazar. But mostly because Ash has been gone for so long I can’t really imagine him coming back.

Cas or Crowley? Cas. Crowley was great and I’ll miss him, but Mark was quite clear about not coming back and I respect it. And Crowley would just never win over Cas for me.

Ben or Claire? Claire. Ben was great, but I feel like we know Claire so much better. And I want to know more.

Jody or Donna? Probably Jody, but could I get them both as a couple?

Sam or Dean?: Dean all the way. I still love Sam (even though it might not be very clear from this post), but Dean just has my heart. I will tag!: Anyone who wants to do this!

[67-blackimpala]

Supernatural

So I saw this at @mayalaen​ (who got it from @intotheruins) and it looked like fun so I decided to play too.

It’s not painfully obvious at all who my favorit character is!

1. What season did you start watching supernatural? - I had rented season one disk one twice (and loved it both times) before I was awesome enough to give me sister Season 1 for Christmas (and regretted it ever since because 1. It took over my life and 2. I gave it away instead of keeping for my self.) Season two had just started airing( I think, it was forever ago) at that time so I was a little late to the party but not that late.

2. Who was the first character you fell in love with? - Dean, and I have stayed in love with him ever since but I love most of the other once to, just not like Dean.

3. Who was a character that you hated at first but grew to love? - Meg probably, I hated her in the beginning because of the way she treated Dean.

4. Which character would you most want to be in a long-term relationship with? - The first name that popped into my head was Dean, but less face it, he has issues so I'm not sure he would be the best choices. So I would like to go back in time and pick season one Dean or young John Winchester.

5. If you could go on just one date with one character, which one would you choose? - If we take away the obvious choice (Dean) I would say Charlie.

6. What would you do on the date? - Just geek out over everything!

7. Which character would you most want to be like? - Charlie, because she is just awesome!

8. Which character would you most like to see brought back from the dead? - (aside from Castiel) Charlie, Benny, Bobby, John. If we are talking bad guys: Crowley and Yellow eyes.

9. Which character would you most like to punch? - There are so many! A side from all the bad guys (Dick, Metatron, Uriel, Zachariah, most of the Campbells, Gordon...) I would say I would like to punch Sam and Dean every once in a while. More Sam then Dean. But when they are fighting or keeping secrets for some lame reason, I would like to hit them.

10. Who is your absolute favorite character? - Aside form Dean? Charlie, Benny and Cas.

11. Which “big bad” do you think was the worst? - Crap, I have to choose? Lucifer probably wins in all over bad, but I think Azazel has taken the most from the boys. Lilith also gets a point for just creeping me out.

12. Which character are you most like? - I like to say Charlie because I'm passionate about the things I love but my friends and family might say I'm more of a Becky.

13. What death hit you the hardest? - Bobby, I was not expecting his death and I will never forgive them for killing him. Charlie was a close second.

14. What season finale hit you the hardest? - One, not only did I have to worry about if someone died but I was terrified that the Impala was ruined and would not come back. After that season two or three were I had to worry about Dean dying (plus Sam's death in season two was really sad).

15. What are your ten all-time favorite episodes? - I wonder if this is how my mother feels when I ask her which of her children she loves the most. If I have to choose (Not necessarily in the right order): 1. Pilot 2. Wendigo 3. Phantom Traveler 5. Dead in the Water 6. Devil's Trap 7. Tall Tales 8. What Is and What Should Never Be 9. Yellow Fever 10 Lazarus Rising Honourable mention: Bad Day at Black Rock, Lazarus Rising ,In the Beginning, The French Mistake, The Girl with the Dungeons and Dragons Tattoo, First Born and Regarding Dean.

16. What’s been your favorite season? - I absolutely love the first one. Nine is a close second.

17. Who is your favorite angel? - Castiel, Gabriel after him.

18. Who’s your favorite demon? - Crowley, yellow eyes and Cain.

19. Who’s your favorite evil character? - Old yellow eyes will always hold a special place in my heart. Close second is young Lilith, who was just creepy which I loved.

20. Do you have any supernatural ships? - Dean/Cas and Dean/Benny can't choose which one I like more.

21. Who’s your favorite supporting actor? - Ty, Felicia and Kim.

22. What’s your favorite quote from the show? - Hunting things, saving people, the family business. Then Driver picks the music, shotgun keeps his pie shut and finally That was scary!

23. If you could cast one famous actor in an episode of spn, who would you chose? - Ryan Reynolds because I love him and I think he would fit well in with those jokers. After him I would love to see Danneel Ackles as some super evil character that would go more after Dean then all the others.

24. If you could write your own episode, what kind of creature would you like to see included? - I would like something to do with Hear/See/Say No Evil, so a witch maybe?

25. Who’s your favorite girl that dean’s hooked up with? - Does the Impala count? No? Fine, Lisa probably since Dean was so happy with her being a yoga instructor.

26. Who’s your favorite girl that sam’s hooked up with? - Jessica.

27. What are some of your favorite convention moments? - The whole Jensen/Misha panels at JIB 2015 and that time Ty was trying to get Jensen to laugh.

28. If you were going to guest star (or be a recurring guest star) on spn, how would you want your character described? - I totally agree with both  @intotheruins and @mayalaen  that I’d love to be a completely insane villain but I would add that Dean would kill me in the end. Plus I would want to steal the Impala at least once!

29. What do you hope to see in the next season? - I would like to see more Purgatory and more hunt of the week.

30.-40. If you had to choose… Bobby or John? Bobby Bela or Ruby? Cassidy's Ruby! (Bela nr 2 and Gen's Ruby nr.3)I loved Cassidy's Ruby attitude so I was a little disappointed when Gen's Ruby didn't have quite the same attitude (Love Gen though and I admire that she wanted to make the character hers, I just missed the old one) Jess or Madison? Jess Jo or Lisa? Jo Charlie or Kevin? Charlie Balthazar or Ash? Tough one but Ash. Cas or Crowley? Cas, but I want, no NEED, a Summer of Love with Crowley every once in a while. Ben or Claire? Ben Jody or Donna? Jody Sam or Dean? If I didn't say Dean I would be lying.

Tagging: @trickstermoose67​ and @lotrspnfangirl​

I’m tagging my betas because I’d really love to know all your answers, but there’s no obligation to play, and if anybody else wants to play and I haven’t tagged you, please consider yourself tagged :)