#i have written essays on this whole thing

[bbreaddog]

Practising Goncharov Theme by @caramiaaddio on violin bc I thought it would add an extra layer of haunting…ness (is that a word?)

Here’s the excerpt I’m playing in the video:

Despite it being in a fuck off key for violin it is a really beautiful piece and it’s absolutely worth the trouble of practising in second position (world’s most hated position) and I’m HOPING 🤞 I can record and (maybe) post a full cover of it someday

[bradassholemajors]

Wtf Is Shock Treatment’s Deal? (Or, Local Critic Discovers Escapism and Having Fun In The Midst of Late Stage Capitalistic Dread)

Watched Shock Treatment for the first time this week, and I am a changed man lol. Here are some disorganized thoughts:

I think something that makes Rocky Horror so special is that it can be as deep or not-deep as you want it to be. Like, if you want to think about the cultural implications of the themes portrayed (hedonism, gay & trans liberation, gender roles, the Invasion-of-the-Body-snatchers style infiltration of outside queer forces, the downfall of the safety contained within a collective identity), you can absolutely do that! There’s so much to be interpreted there!! But if you are just here to see Tim Curry looking incredibly sexy and violently thrust along to the Time Warp at a midnight showing with a bunch of cool strangers, that is absolutely awesome, too. Slay!! Take what you want.

BUT SHOCK TREATMENT MANNNN??? Shock Treatment is a whole different ballgame lol. Like, it is also a thematically rich goldmine, if you’re willing to squint a little— in terms of content included, not necessarily how it’s portrayed within the narrative. In the words of Barry Bostwick here, “it was a statement about the future that we weren't quite ready to explore. We didn't really even have the mental emotional vocabulary to understand what Richard [O’Brien, the creator] was trying to say.” I think this is spot-fucking-on!!! It’s absolutely frighteningly prescient, especially today in terms of the commodification of mental health. Like, woah. Janet being crowned “Miss Mental Health” felt like such a Gwyneth Paltrow moment. Cultural prophet Richard O’Brien saw the dark cloud of Betterhelp and wellness culture galloping over in the horizon in the distance of the American landscape, and he set out to warn us.

I still don’t quite understand what happened in the movie. I still don’t know what my takeaway was supposed to be. And I guess if you’re a little insane and love having fun doing thematic analysis with weird media (like me), taking Shock Treatment seriously may be right for you, lol. But thematically overall I think it’s safe to say: it’s a lot less coherent than its predecessor. It’s messy. It’s not interested in being flawless. It’s not interested in appealing to an audience. It’s barely interested in being a sequel. Shock Treatment is lowkey pointing and laughing in the face of those who showed up expecting a masterpiece— which admittedly was me, because I take Rocky Horror pretty seriously. (I put off watching Shock Treatment for a while bc I wasn’t sure about how it would affect the Rocky Horror Universe I had in my head.) If not for the internet reviews prepping me, I would have walked in completely expecting another nuanced perfect symphony of a movie to measure up to Rocky Horror’s magic.

But the thing was? Watching Shock Treatment, it ended up I did not really care!!!!! I was having the time of my life!!!!!

(more under the cut whoops)

Wtf was going on!!!!!!!!!!! Who knows!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I still don’t quite know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I loved it!!!

This reaction of such joy, just letting myself vibe out made me think because when did I start getting surprised when watching a movie is more pleasurable than not??? Isn’t that the entire point of media??

I think with the modern commodification of media analysis and examining pop culture up close, I’d argue that Fun Media without a message is actually pretty hard to come by— at least in mainstream culture. Even stuff as sanitized as Disney movies are now digging into like generational trauma, appealing to what seems to be a collective search for depth (or at least the appearance of depth.) Modern neo-nazi brands of fascism wields power like never before, horrific images of violence follow everyone left and right. Sometimes it seems like this open secret, that everyone knows there’s this looming darkness at the forefront of our minds at all times.

So this transition from Rocky Horror to Shock Treatment felt actually sort of powerful to me. Rocky Horror’s generation-long reverberations of shamelessly depicting sensual revelry are so powerful; it’s bold even for today! (Of course, we all know transvestite isn’t a term commonly used today, but looking at it through the lens of its time, it becomes clear what a miracle the movie is. Knowing what it must have meant to queer people at the time it became a phenomenon— giving them a real space to be themselves in a hostile world criminalizing who they were, in a time of oppressive pressure to stay silent — that is the type of brave blatant acceptance hard to come by in any era.) Rocky Horror is something I don’t know if will ever happen again, and its sequel seems to concur.

Shock Treatment has been called a cash grab but I beg to differ. If you’ve seen it, no offense: but does this seem marketable to you??? It seems like it’s a Richard O’Brien project (already wacky) that went through several levels of development hell and heavy modifications through the creative process. Said with the utmost respect… it may have got away from them a bit. Put lovingly, Shock Treatment lowkey kinda sucks a little at times. It’s silly, it’s got a huge cast and musical fun galore. It’s serving B-movie realness. I don’t say this to bash on it, I say this with a bemused respect— I think the existence of Shock Treatment is as much a miracle as Rocky Horror (aren’t all creations???)

So in the first iteration, we have advocacy and fighting for freedom for those long silenced… but also, Shock Treatment seems to allow the creators to just let themselves have fun. Aren’t they both revolutions in their own right? Does everything have to be lasting cultural milestones or does our enjoyment matter in the moment? I’d argue we need both as human beings to thrive. It comes back to that Rocky-Horror-experience philosophy I covered where you’re taking what you feel you need most from the media you consume: a message or a celebration of just being here.

In conclusion, sometimes shit doesn’t have to be that deep. More movies should just say “fuck it, we ball” and give you the most absolutely incoherent fun time of your life. I love not taking things seriously, and I love creators willing to not take their work seriously. Perhaps Richard O’Brien also had a premonition with Shock Treatment in the sense of how he just had fun with it! Maybe we need less attempts at masterpieces and more attempts at just creation for the joy of it— or both, because joyful creation makes masterpieces!!! I’d love to see more creators of every skill level and every background, known and not known, say fuck you to capitalism and expectation and marketability and just say, we’re gonna do it anyhow, anyhow!!!

[dootznbootz]

I honestly get a little annoyed that people will act like Penelope wouldn't be in the Fields of Punishment alongside Odysseus :P

Because she'd either go with him or literally be there because of her own things. I mean...She's not that nice either. They're literally "likeminded", all the war crimes he would tell her, she'd be thinking "Oh!!! Good thinking!!!" The only thing is, she just didn't GET to do those war crimes because she wasn't in the war. She would scold him for the stupid things he did acting like she's never done the same or wouldn't do the same.

Also as if she wouldn't also tell Polyphemus her name? Maybe not exactly, but she'd do something JUST as prideful/dumb eventually. BECAUSE THEY'RE SIMILAR. SAME MIND!!!

[kirbyddd]

[romanogerslover]

Anyone else wanna go to delulu land with me after having seen Mission Impossible DR Part 1 ?

[citrus-cactus]

So yeah, Shuuji/Ryo! I guess I should go searching for fanfic when I’m on my laptop, because AO3’s relationship tag filtering in Digimon Survive (on mobile, anyway) seem genuinely… unusable? 🤔

[edgepunk]

I'd love to see a journey of Peter Parker's self-discovery in his early-to-mid-20s and realizing he's bi. like, there's never too late to explore your sexuality and realize you might not be straight, but we all know Marvel are a bunch of cowards and will never lean into the fact that Peter's been bi-coded for decades

[henryhas2moms]

i feel no obligation to respect ouat’s canon— ouat doesn’t even respect ouat’s canon

[mbat]

i was trying really hard to make a post about how i keep seeing jewish characters in shows that seem to never escape the stereotypes/patterns that ive noticed are basically always there, but man im really not the person to try and talk in depth about things, im not very good at it

that said, literally even what i would consider the better rep of jewish characters still seem to fall into the same stereotypes/patterns of every other jewish character and its like... why is that? even in shows that seem so aware of every other issue being faced by minorities, jews are the ones left behind?

and its not necessarily bad that they fall into these patterns, especially if theyre given more depth and allowed to be people outside of those things, but like... those things are still there. idk maybe im being weird about it

[thedisablednaturalist]

Unfortunately all chatgpt is good for is interview/job application stuff which I think says a lot about the hiring process as a whole

[idcallmyselfhuman]

im about to start throwing shit at genshin defenders for missing the whole damn point

genshin vs hsr discourse can be summed up with a single tweet

[cyatzura]

it's so disappointing how the current government in germany stressed again and again since 2021 that they wanted to follow a 'feminist foreign policy', a foreign policy that was supposed to focus increasingly on marginalized groups, human rights and a policy of peace, only to oppose the proposal that the european union should collectively demand a humanitarian ceasefire in gaza; instead, the european union now only calls for corridors and temporary pauses for humanitarian aid

[tecchous-thicc-buttocks]

tips for self confidence? 💓

random af ask but WOO!!! I LOVE ANONS

i've got one main philosophy when it comes to self confidence and that is that insecurity isn't real.

im a person. if I see another person, I would think something about them for like a few seconds then move on with my life. that's literally how I treat myself. "oh i'm ugly" cool thought that lasts 2 seconds. "i'm so damn gorgeous" lasts 5-10 seconds max. onto the next.

my advice is to redirect your doubts away from yourself as an entire person and instead see it as parts of you that you can always improve on. today, you may feel that you're not a worthy person because you got a bad grade on an exam or made mistakes at work, but try to isolate that single aspect away from "you" as a whole. if you wouldn't define yourself based on one good day, you shouldn't for a bad one.

remember that you are not one thing. you are not just your looks, and if you find yourself unattractive, you don't need to be intelligent or funny in order to compensate for this. you don't owe anyone anything, and you don't need to earn the right to exist.

that's in terms of self-love ofc. for the confidence part, it's practice tbh. approach people randomly and give them a compliment. don't overthink before you act, and just do it ™. it is never as deep as you think it is. ask yourself if you saw someone else doing this, what would you think? and when I say that it's practice, I mean try to do more and more little things until it becomes second nature.

I'll give a concrete example: I've been on crutches for the past 10 weeks and take public transportation for a few hours almost daily. when I get on, sometimes there aren't available seats, and I was never able to ask someone to get up and give me their seat. "what if they have a disability I can't see? I'm only on crutches it's just temporary, it's not my right to ask someone to stand up for me. I don't want to be rude" writing it out, I sound pretty stupid, but honestly it took someone else (who was also standing) asking a seated person to get up for me to make me realize I'm lacking confidence for absolutely no reason. If the roles were swapped and I was sitting and saw someone in crutches, I would be the one feeling embarrassed if they asked me to take my seat, not the other way around.

all of this to say that it's always worse in your head than it really is. write out your fear or say it out loud or just verbalize it in your mind and you'll realize how silly it is. I believe that self-confidence is exaggerated nowadays because everything is about the self and the way you're perceived by others, but it really isn't. yeah I'm not the most eloquent person out there. I tend to talk too much when I should really keep things to myself. so what? what's so wrong with that? I work on myself and hope to get better at it someday, but I know my worth. on a fundamental level, I know I'll never be satisfied with myself, but I never equate that with what I am or what I deserve, and that's the essential message of all of this. love isn't about cherishing something perfect and neither is self-love. now read that sentence again.

ty for your ask anon, and I hope whoever you're asking this q for, got even a crumb of what I said and it helped them a little. I'd tell you that you're gorgeous and slay and all that jazz but I think it's more pertinent to tell you that someone, somewhere in this world is creating an oc that looks and acts just like you, wanting to BE you. have a GREAT day and remember to commit tax fraud cutely while hydrating your veins.

[ladysqueakinpip]

literally how has AI not been banned yet

[caffeine-high]

me drafting a quick update email to my psychiatrist: *790 words in ~half an hour*

me writing my essay: *struggles for an entire day and get maybe 300 words down*

[cloudblaze]

Onestar's Confession was, hmmm, not as egregious as I'd feared but also not a book I have any desire to reread. Unsurprisingly it suffers from many of the same issues as Leopardstar's Honor, being poorly paced and offering very little new insight on the title character. But there's something in particular that bothers me about this book, and I'm trying to figure out exactly what that is. I think it's about how Onestar is framed, but it's a bit complicated.

Onestar is a flawed cat who I believe is served best as a side/background character, not a protagonist. I think up until now the series hasn't had to try too hard to justify his actions because we know what crises are influencing him and we get to witness his slow and tragic downfall in the main arcs. While the way he changed in TNP after becoming leader feels harsh, the books back then made it clear why he had to change. It's shown over and over that WindClan is respected by no one. They had a history in the old territories of being attacked in their own camp — it happened at least six times within Tallstar's life — and even driven from their home entirely. Other Clans view them as weak, and after the move to the lake, even their ThunderClan allies are disrespecting their border and their independence and talking openly about how WindClan is too wimpy to do anything about it and they would simply disintegrate without ThunderClan taking care of them. It's no surprise when WindClan tears itself apart over a succession crisis, half supporting Tallstar's wishes and half supporting Mudclaw who promised to make them strong and respected by their neighbors. In response, Onestar can't be like Tallstar if he wants to keep the peace within his own Clan. He needs to step up and be an independent leader who can defend his Clan's home and honor. All of this is apparent in TNP, and although it makes Firestar sad and confused, we can see why, in Onestar's mind, this had to happen.

AVoS gave us a new perspective on Onestar by showing how selfish and fearful he can be. We'd already seen in Po3, OotS, and Bramblestar's Storm (and again later in Crowfeather's Trial) that he can be completely unreasonable and stubborn when under duress, so I think these traits are a fair extension of that. (Also people change over time, so I can accept that even if he didn't start out this way, his experiences as a leader going through constant disasters could have warped his views a bit.) It's been years and I still don't know how I feel about the secret son twist, but if nothing else it gave us another Onestar dynamic to explore.

Whether you love or hate how he was written, he was given strong characterization through these stories. I see him as almost like a fallen hero type, someone who was thrown into a position of power and put under immense pressure to become the leader his Clan needed, and who pushed things too far and fell from grace as a result. We see this most effectively not through his own eyes, but instead through those who have to live with the consequences of his actions. Firestar was his friend who helped him again and again, so it hurts when Firestar loses that friendship entirely through no fault of his own. We can assume it was a hard choice for Onestar because we know how much he looked up to Firestar, relied on him, even gave him territory as a thank-you gift, before receiving his own nine lives. Onestar's intense desire to prove that WindClan walks alone now ended up dragging all four Clans into an intense battle — and destroying ThunderClan's herb stock in the process, leaving them vulnerable to greencough later. And in AVoS, cats were killed because of his desire to hide his secret and flee from his own fear. He selfishly withheld vital medicine from ShadowClan and left the other Clans to face the threat of Darktail alone. He's so caught up in his us-versus-them mindset that he spirals farther and farther out of control. It's a tragedy, and a lesson about his character that is so much more impactful without his constant "woe is me" inner dialogue.

To be clear, I don't think it's unrealistic for Onestar to bend over backwards trying to excuse everything he does and prove to himself that he's really a good guy deep down. In the beginning he was doing what he believed he had to, even when it was a hard and painful choice, and seems to have kept this belief even when his goals became less about what's good for everyone else and more about what works for him. So of course he would see his disastrous actions as the best option or even the only option. The issue for me comes when the emphasis of the narrative is put on the lies he tells himself, his regrets about not being honest with his family, and his fears about the past coming back to bite him, instead of focusing on what he actually does and how his choices shape who he is. We can say that his choice to abandon Smoke and Darkkit made him fearful of the consequences, but no, it was Stoneteller's (absurd and unnecessary) prophecy that gave him anxiety. Whereas Onestar used to be a driving force behind drama, in his own SE he feels much more passive because control over his decisions is so frequently taken out of his grasp and given instead to random chance and circumstances out of his control. And for me personally, this whole new perspective has made him a much less sympathetic character, which is ironic considering how much sympathy he feels for himself throughout the book. Because now he feels less like a guy whose life was pulled out of his control and who then had to consciously adapt into something arguably worse, and more like a whiny friend who makes life harder for himself and won't listen to advice no matter how hard you try to help.

There is one place where I do think this approach actually helped his story, however, so I should mention that. A criticism I have of Shattered Sky is that it left Onestar out of the narrative behind his closed borders far too much, which made his confession feel like it came out of nowhere. He went from spiteful and impossible to negotiate with straight to totally respectful and noble within the span of two minutes, which made for a very jarring conclusion to the book. His SE, at the very least, fills in that gap by showing how increasingly desperate he felt and how much harder it got to keep hiding his secret, finally causing him to break down and confess. This scene makes more sense here than it did before. I can appreciate that, but it does feel like too little too late. (To be fair, I don't know how Shattered Sky could have resolved the issue itself without the advantage of a WindClan POV, but regardless, the pacing was still so choppy in that book.)

In conclusion... I don't know what to say about Onestar's Confession except that there wasn't really anything they could have written into this book to justify its whole existence. Onestar already had so much going for him that I personally don't think giving him his own book from his own perspective could ever succeed. They could have written it better than they did, paced it better, sure, but they couldn't have added anything about him to these already established plotlines so many years after the fact without accidentally (or purposefully) changing who he is. His whole life and motivations are either laid out plainly or inferred in all of his appearances in the main series. All we lacked were his own secret inner thoughts and feelings: his intense fear and self-pity. And there just isn't enough substance there to make into an entire book without repeating huge sections of books we've already read — which is exactly what they decided to do.