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suzumenokakimono · 4 years

Text

I was here first II

Pairing: Namjoon / Jimin x reader

Genre: AU, smut, fluff, angst, roommates to lovers, fwb, friends to lover

Summary: Jimin was your roommate, best friend and in love with you so bad it wasn’t even funny. His friends knew this all along and were surely surprised you’ve never noticed. But you didn’t. You were oblivious as the Earth was round. Now, Jimin decided it was time to finally confess to you. He asked one of his closest friends, Namjoon, to help him. But what if you end up liking Namjoon instead of Jimin?

Word count: 7k

A/N: Thank you, N.

While I was writing this, I realized what’s ‘wrong’ with my writing style but then also it hit me: not gonna change it.

Also, there is stuff going on in my head, hence the plot. * flies away *

Namjoon though.

Tagged: (as requested 💜: @ jinnfires)

Masterlist | Chapters: One | Two | Three (incoming)

-------

That was your favorite mug.

You remembered how you got it, actually. Jimin had broken your mug. The only mug you had brought with you when you’d moved in. It was really stupid, it was not even special to you. You just never bought anything more, never needed it to, to be honest.

Before you started to live with Jimin, your previous roommate had had a lot of stuff and she’d always let you use it. It was really convenient and you gladly took advantage of that. When she moved out, you were left with just your stuff, which was not a lot. Jimin always said you could use anything you wanted from his kitchen but it was nice to have something of your own. So when he broke your only mug, he immediately bought you a new one. He was feeling very bad about that and kept sending you tons of links to internet shops, asking what you would like. To finally make him stop crying over the whole situation, you’d picked one and you used it ever since. After those two years in this apartment, you got yourself more things, that you could call yours, but this one stayed as your favourite.

And now it was broken. You were standing in the middle of the kitchen and looking at the shattered pieces on the floor, not sure how that had happened. No. That was a lie. You knew exactly how it had happened, you just weren’t sure… how.

The morning started pretty ordinarily. It was a weekend so both you and Jimin didn’t have work and stayed at home. He was trying to convince you to go to the cinema or something, but looking at the weather you weren’t sure it was the best idea. You just wanted to stay inside. You decided to make yourself a nice tea and finally start reading that book you’d wanted to read for so long.

Jimin’s face leaned out from behind the door frame to check what was going on. He had heard the noise and wanted to make sure you were alright. He saw you standing in the kitchen and started to think he had misheard but then he noticed the mess on the floor. He didn’t have any issues with recognizing your mug. Or what was left of it.

“Did you just…?”.

You hadn’t even noticed him. When he spoke you turned around, surprised by his presence.

“Huh… what?”

“Did you just break the mug from me?”

For some reason he was pretty amused by this. Knowing what happened with the previous one and seeing what you did with the one he got you, was a little ironic.

“I can’t believe you broke THE MUG!”

He chuckled to himself but then he saw your face expression and just burst into laughter. You looked so surprised and out of place, for what the reason he assumed, was your accident with the mug. He started to help you clean up, since you were barefoot and could step into some smaller pieces and hurt yourself.

“What happened?”

“Um… sorry. I… got distracted. Shame…”

You really were sorry about that. One of the reasons you liked the mug was how you’d actually gotten it. The story was simple but there was a story and that’s what counted. You can’t say that very often about your everyday life’s items.

You helped Jimin with cleaning, making sure nothing stayed on the floor and took out one of his mugs from the cabinet. While doing so you were holding your phone in your other hand, looking intensely on its screen.

“So, what about the movie?”

“... movie? What movie?”

“Are you still not going?”

“No…”, you looked at your phone again. “Something came up.”

-------

When Jimin opened the door, it was around 6am. It was already getting bright outside but all he was thinking about was to sleep for the next week. He was exhausted and kind of dehydrated. Not being entirely conscious he went to the kitchen and just turned on the tap to drink some water. He twisted his head to the side and leaned over the sink. Cold, clean water ran down his throat and felt a little more alive than a few seconds ago. He promised himself, not for the first time to be honest, not to drink that much next time. Let’s face it. He was not going to quit drinking entirely. He just wanted not to feel half dead each morning after a fun, long night. That was never fun. The only plus of those situations was you, you taking care of him when he was in a state where crawling on the floor seemed like the only possible way of moving. You always complained but never denied helping him. It also gave you many possibilities of making fun of him.

He turned off the water and dried his face with a towel. He needed a shower but was too tired to care about that. Soft bed was calling for him. While passing by your room, he saw the door not entirely closed, so he quietly stepped closer to check up on you. You were sleeping in your bed, wrapped in your comforter like a burrito and snoring quietly. Your pretty dress was on a chair and shoes discarded separately on the floor. He saw your hair pointing out and this way he was sure you were okay. Namjoon did what he was asked to. He went to his room, feeling a little heavy, remembering again what had happened in the club and how his whole plan didn’t work out at all. He knew it was his fault that he backed out and just left you. But for him, the price was too big. What ifs were killing him this whole time and he decided he would not take this risk. He needed more time.

He closed your door behind him and went to his room. He had a lot of stuff to think about. Maybe a new plan to figure out. But not this morning. The only thing he needed and also wanted to do was sleep.

-------

It had been a week since you, Jimin and Namjoon went out. None of you mentioned the night very often, if at all. When you woke up the next day, you just wanted to die quietly without any distractions and minding silence in Jimin’s room, he was already dead. You both spent that time separately, doing your own stuff, doing everything that was necessary to survive. After that, you just got back to the normal life routine. You hadn’t found out what the meaning of that night was anyway, so you didn’t pay much attention to it.

No. That was a lie. You didn’t care much about the situation with Jimin. Sure, he’d acted weird and left you for some random girl in the club, but he was your friend and apparently he’d gotten back home safe. You did care, however, about the other guy. The one you met that night.

Namjoon didn’t give you any contact information, no phone number, no messenger options. When he’d left your room, he’d just disappeared and never tried to reach out to you. He’d left you with just a memory of him, him on top of you in your bed, groaning low in your ear. This image stayed in your head rent free and didn’t want to move out anytime soon. You didn’t remember everything. You lost a little track of the events after you both left the cab. But you were definitely sure you’d held his dick at some point. That was unmistakable.

Having this vividly in your mind, you tried to find him. The best way and probably the only way, was through Jimin. You’d started by asking him how work was, hoping he would mention his friend at some point. But he didn’t. So’d you tried to nonchalantly talk about your night out but it somehow ended up even worse. He’d changed the subject immediately, without any reason and had been avoiding it since then. You didn’t understand that, but nevertheless, you understood you wouldn’t get any information this way. Sighing heavily, you dropped it for a moment. You really liked Namjoon and wanted to see him again, but apparently you had to wait for something to happen or him to find you, because the universe was telling you to wait. So you waited.

It was Friday evening. You were looking for a movie to watch and you wanted to watch it in the living room. Jimin was writing to you the whole day how one of his annoying co-workers had a birthday and was insisting on going out later to a bar. He was nagging how he didn’t want to, but had to and was asking you for some good excuses to go back home. You liked the idea of spending the evening alone in your apartment so you refused and laughed at his response, when he realized you enjoyed his suffering. Sitting wrapped in a blanket on your living room couch, you were ready for tonight's film show, knowing very well your roommate wouldn't be home anytime soon.

-------

Jimin was sipping his beer without any enjoyment. He was forced to come to the bar and drink, and that took all the fun from being at the bar and drinking. He thought maybe pouring all possible alcohol straight down his throat would be a good solution to survive this ‘birthday party’ but then again he promised himself not to drink that much. At least, not as much as last time. Oh fuck, last time… Just thinking about it made him anxious and he immediately took a big sip. It’d been a week and he couldn’t get over it. He didn’t talk to anyone about that, he was embarrassed and so pissed at himself. He thought maybe hiding everything deep, deep inside him would just make it go away.

Namjoon sat next to him, pushing him to the side, forcing Jimin to make more space. He also got invited for the party, but was a little merrier than his friend. He was drinking some dark beer and looking around the crowd. One of their female colleagues tried to talk to him, he was pretty sure she was flirting, but after a few moments he found an excuse and ran away.

“She has nice legs.”, Jimin mumbled from his glass.

“Yeah, then go and talk to her. I’ll save your spot.”

“I don’t think she likes me. I think she likes you.”

“Bummer.”

“Why are you so defensive? You’re not madly in love with your friend, like me. Or are you?”

Of course Jimin had to mention you. He was drinking and was in a bad mood from the moment they’d entered the bar. This was the first time they actually talked with each other, since your night in the club. Jimin never got back to Namjoon, like he said he would. They were avoiding one another, for their own reasons, which they kept for themselves. Namjoon was seriously scared that everything that had happened between you two was perfectly noticed and his friendship with Jimin was ruined. He really didn’t want that but at the same time, he couldn't blame Jimin. So, when he’d come to the table to finally break the ice, he wasn’t sure what he was going to find. It had surprised him that Jimin didn’t seem to be angry.

“I’m not in love with you. You’re not my type. Too much penis.” Jimin snored at that excellent joke and got back to his drink. This was a good sign.

This past week hadn’t been easy. Avoiding his friend and distracting himself with anything that’s possible just to not think about you was pretty exhausting. He was actually happy someone had come up with the idea of going out to the bar. He needed to chill.

“I fucked this up, didn’t I?”, Jimin spoke out of the blue.

“No. Because you haven’t done anything.”, Namjoon said, without even thinking.

Jimin looked at his friend with an unspoken question, not sure what he meant. Namjoon swallowed hard. The fuck he’d just said that and started the whole conversation? He didn’t mean to say that! How the hell was this supposed to help to not think about you? This was already not going well.

“You’ve never actually tried, you know… talked to her…”, he started to sweat.

“Yes, exactly. I fucked this up, because I have no balls to try.”

“But… why?”

“I thought… maybe…”, he started to mumble. “I should first make her jealous, you know? By picking up someone else and she… would…”

“Make… her jealous? How the hell was she supposed to be jealous if she had no idea what was going on?”

“You know… She sees me with some hot chick, thinks, oh that could have been me…”

Namjoon smelled bullshit from a distance. Jimin was too smart to actually think this kind of shitty strategy would work. Plus, that had never been his plan for that night in the first place..

“Oh, cut the crap!”, Namjoon lost his patience and probably shouted too loud, Jimin looked at him, surprised. “What the hell really happened that night?”

Jimin stopped sipping his beer, trying to collect his thoughts. He was torned apart. He wanted to forget about everything and at the same time, needed to say everything that was eating him alive.

“I panicked.”, Jimin’s sight was glued to the table.

“That… I would call an understatement, at least.

“Remember when we were talking and… we started to look back on the day we met… She mentioned how I was drunk and falling from my chair… She turned to you…”

Namjoon froze in place. This was it. Jimin was about to say how him, his friend, stole the girl of his dreams. There was no turning back.

“She was talking about me like the biggest dork. She was laughing, not taking me seriously…”

Namjoon took a deep breath and wasn’t sure he understood. His mind was completely lost in connecting the dots.

“She’s seeing me as her friend. I was trying to be with her that night, like with the other girls, you know? I was flirting and touching her, she didn’t care at all. We both were drinking and yet… it wasn’t enough. That’s why I ran away.”

Jimin got back to sipping his drink, not looking at Namjoon. And if he had, he would’ve seen an absolutely blank page. Namjoon felt like his brain got a reset and he was sitting with a blue screen displayed for everyone watching. He never doubted that what he did back in the club was wrong, however he was certain Jimin had seen it and was about to kill him. Not noticing how he had been drooling all over you was pretty impossible. And yet, here he was, safe and sound. He narrowed his eyes in that moment, finally connecting the dots. You both were pretty dumb and blind when it came to feelings and reading someone else’s emotions.

“So… you got scared because she was laughing at something you did three years ago?”

“It sounds stupid, I know. But I felt really weird. Like, me doing that is all she can see. Like, that night defined me in her eyes. She sees me as a dork… nothing serious…”

“You’re not a dork.”, Namjoon sighed heavily. This conversation was pretty weird and was making him nervous. However, what made him slightly relaxed was that, one problem was already solved: Jimin was absolutely oblivious about that night.

“I know I am. And she knows I am.”

“Maybe she likes dorks?”, why the fuck did he say that?!

“I actually don’t know what her type is.”

I’m her type.

“Did she date anyone, after moving in with you?”

“I’m not sure… I think there was a guy or two… nothing really serious.”

“You’ve never talked about this? Never gossiped about your lovelife?”

“We did, but she was always more curious about mine, since I did bring some girls a few times. She was always asking why a handsome guy like me doesn’t have a girlfriend”, Jimin smiled to himself after a word handsome. He liked when you called him that.

“She thinks you’re handsome.”

“And she doesn’t like me.”

But she likes me.

Namjoon mentally slapped himself for that.

“What about the other girl?”, he desperately wanted to change the subject.

Talking about you, in a perspective of you liking Jimin or not, was killing him. You were on his mind all the time anyway, since you’d met. And he had to hide that. He started to have problems with being a good friend and supporting Jimin with his crush and his efforts to win you over.

“What girl?”

“The one you were making out when you left us. Y/A saw the two of you at the bar.”

“There’s not much to talk about.”, Jimin looked flustered. He turned his head away.

“Why? Did you go with her and something went wrong?”

“No… it’s….”

“Did she laugh at you? You couldn’t do it? You were too drunk? You fell asleep in the middle?”

“Are you having fun?”

“Yes, yes I am!”

Jimin looked at Namjoon, waiting for another assumption about his night. But none of them came, he stopped making stuff up after seeing his friend's expression.

“It’s nothing like that. I didn’t go with her.”, Jimin sighed.

“I’m a little confused now. You ditched Y/A for some random chick and then you just… came home?”

“No. I… “

“What? What the fuck happened?”

“I went to the internet caffe and played Overwatch.”

Namjoon snorted so much his beer came right through his nose. However, he admitted it was worth it. He would have never expected Jimin to say something like that.

“I’m sorry, you did what?”

“Ugh… Yes, we made out a little but I wasn’t in the mood. I was thinking about Y/A the whole time and it… it just didn’t feel right.”

“You were thinking about Y/N while making out with another girl?”

“I forgot how big of a dipshit you can be, you know?”

You have no idea.

-------

The doorbell woke you up from the deepest moment of your dream. When you lifted your head you weren’t sure where you were, what was going on or who you were. You needed a moment to recover and another ring to finally get up. Blindly you reached out to your nightstand and grabbed your phone.

2:05 am. Who the fuck was that?

You had gone to sleep some time ago, knowing Jimin had his own keys and he would help himself with opening the door. You were not expecting anyone, especially at this time, so while still being a little asleep you were very hesitant to open the door. You looked through the visor on the door but it was too dark to determine anything. But there was someone there, for sure.

Another ring made you jump in place. Someone was really stubborn and didn’t want to let this go. So, hoping nobody doing this kind of noise would try to kill you, you slowly turned the locks and looked at what was waiting for you in the corridor.

First you saw Namjoon. He was standing right in front of the door, basically leaning into it. He barely looked at you because all his attention was on another person hanging on his shoulder. And that person was Jimin.

You looked first at Namjoon, then at your roommate, then again at his friend. Many questions were growing inside your head, you were fully awake at this point.

“What…?”

You tried to articulate one of them, but it died before it left your mouth. Was Jimin unconscious? You just pointed at him, which was worth a thousand words.

“I’m sorry… I couldn’t find his keys. He said they’re in his pocket but… I’m not gonna…

He moved a step forward, trying to get to the apartment, without bumping into you. You shook your head, realizing you were blocking his way. You moved away to make the corridor clear but Namjoon didn’t go any further.

“Can you… help me?”

You immediately got to the other side of Jimin and put his arm on your shoulder. You felt his weight on you and a second after that you smelled all the alcohol he drank at the bar. He was indeed unconscious. His body felt like a ragdoll, it was really hard to get him into his room, but both of you somehow managed to. His feet were dragging along on the floor while you pulled him through the corridor. You threw him on his bed, which was a little too rough, but he didn’t react in any way.

“I think this time he might be dead.”, Namjoon was standing next to you.

“Possibly.”

You sighed heavily. You knew what was coming so you jumped out to the bathroom and brought a big plastic bowl. You put it next to Jimin’s bed, just in case he woke up and decided he didn’t like all the alcohol he had in his body. And food. And his insides. You assumed him waking up would be a very dramatic moment.

“That’s clever. I don’t think he’ll aim for that anyway, but at least we tried.”, Namjoon didn’t fool himself. If Jimin woke up, he would be half dead and puking into the bowl would be the last thing on his list.

You both left the room. You were trying to act quietly, even though there was no such force that could have woken up Jimin in this state. You closed the door behind you and looked at Namjoon. Before, you smelled alcohol because of your friend. He drank like there was no tomorrow, for sure. But Joon did not say no to drinks as well. He was not as drunk as your roommate but he was swaying in place, not able to focus his sight on you.

“Are you feeling ok?”

“I’m fine… I just need to lay down…”, he was a little embarrassed and wanted to go home and sleep.

“Do you want some tea?”, you asked, already being on your way to the kitchen. On your way you brushed your hand on his arm, trying to pretend that was an accident, didn’t mean much.

Namjoon didn’t say anything. He just watched you going, focusing on how you were swaying your hips, followed you and after a few seconds.

“Tea sounds perfect.”

He was watching while you were jumping around and making him and yourself a tea. Yet again he saw you in a different light than before. When he stood still, holding the door frame for support, he focused on the way you looked. He remembered you in your pretty dress and makeup. Well, also without a dress. But this time you were just in your pajama shorts and a simple loose T-shirt. Your hair was tied up on top of your head and you were definitely not wearing any makeup. Even though his vision was not the best at that time, he decided you looked very pretty with a bare face.

When the tea was ready, you grabbed both mugs by their handles and just took them to the living room, giving him an unspoken direction to do the same. Namjoon followed you again and you both sat on the couch. He felt much better sitting, it made him feel more sure he wouldn’t fall down. Or at least from his seat, there was a much shorter trip to the floor.

“Party was that good?”, you asked.

“Afterparty, maybe.”

“After-what? Why did you need that?” “It was Jimin’s idea. He… didn’t have much fun at the birthday party, so we went somewhere else just to… well, drink. We didn’t plan to stay long… and that part of the plan worked out.”

Namjoon seemed a little tired. He leaned his head on the back of the couch and closed his eyes. Was he falling asleep? You took that opportunity and looked at him. He wasn’t wearing his beanie this time. His natural dark hair was short and dyed to a blonde color, shaved at the bottom and slightly underneath into a nice undercut. It really suited him and you were fighting with the urge to brush your fingers through his hair. You imagined how it would feel under your fingertips. Probably very soft. His grey hoodie was a little loose on his body, you’d noticed he liked a little baggier clothes. He’d matched it with light jeans and red converse.

Somehow, you missed him and wanted him to stay. Even just to talk with you. You were pinching yourself to start a conversation, any conversation, you didn’t want him to leave.

“You know, after that fun night in the club you disappeared… I haven’t heard from you… ”

Namjoon opened his eyes and looked at you. It definitely helped him wake up.

“I…”, he wasn’t sure what to say.

He had been avoiding you. Not that you’d had many occasions to actually meet. But he was trying to forget about a pretty girl that he really liked but very well knew, his friend was in love with. He had to remind himself of that all the time. The whole evening with Jimin was not helping at all. Getting in touch with you, after all that had happened the night you met was a very bad idea.

“I didn’t want to bother you. We’ve barely met and I thought that… we’re not that close, so it doesn’t matter.”

“What does that mean?”

“We’re not friends… we don’t have to hang out… you know... “, he had no idea what he was talking about.

“We’re not but you’re Jimin’s friend. You can’t run away from him.”

“I didn’t run away from you.”

“But you did avoid me?”

“Yes. NO!”, his brain was malfunctioning. He pulled himself up, grabbed his tea and took a sip. It burned his tongue a little but was a great distraction.

“You don’t like me?”

“NO!”, he almost jumped in his place and spilled his tea on his legs. “What? Of course not! I do!”

You laughed at his reaction.

“I like you too.”

You smiled at him, blushing a little. You took your mug from the coffee table to distract yourself from the embarrassment that was attacking you. He didn’t miss that. He was still a little buzzed but you talking to him was keeping him awake. He was watching you intensely, trying to remember how you’d looked that night. He put his mug away, to avoid spilling tea anywhere and leaned his head back on the couch sliding down a little in his seat. He wasn’t sure if he was getting sleepy again or whether your presence was affecting him this way. Whatever it was, a nice warm feeling spread through his body after your small confession. He smiled back at you, which made you even more flustered and you almost hid your face in your mug.

“Ah… you know… after all that happened, I was pretty sure you actually don’t want to see me.”

“But, why? Did I do something stupid? Did I… fall asleep while we were…?”

“No, we didn’t do anything! When I put you into bed you were already sleeping.”

“I actually wanted to ask, did I fall asleep while we were kissing.”, you giggled. You remembered Namjoon left before anything happened.

“Oh, then, my answer would be yes!”, he smiled with his cute smile, showing his dimples. A shy blush also showed up on his cheeks.

“Huh, I think I drank a little too much.”

“That’s fine. It’s not like I was sober. I was there too.”

“Yes… yes, you were.”, you looked into his eyes. “I was drunk, half naked and you rolled me into my comforter and left.”

Namjoon’s breath hitched for a second. Your straightforward statement made him remember how that had actually happened, that everything he had in his head really took place.

You on the bed, him on top of you. He tried to get up, you held him. He was trying to leave, you took off your dress. Later he was trying to convince himself that it didn’t happen, he didn’t see you naked waist up, that his hard dick wasn’t…

“... yeah, you took that dress off…”, he drifted off for a moment, looking in your direction, but not at you. Images were flashing right in front of his eyes.

Then he heard you laughing.

“I did take my dress off”, you hid your face in your hands. Your expression changed in one second, again.

Namjoon snorted right after you. Talking about this was making him a little nervous. He felt his hands starting to sweat. You were sitting close to him, with your legs on the couch, one arm spread behind his head. Your shorts riled up your thighs showing even more skin. Loose T-shirt hanging on your shoulder, making your collarbone very much visible.

You put your mug back to the table and moved closer to him.

“We were both drunk, but I do remember most of it.”, you knew you were blushing, but didn’t want that to stop you.

“... I… maybe half of it.” he lied. He remembered everything.

“I can’t stop thinking about what if…”

He swallowed hard. He looked at your lips. Your hand behind his head found his hair and played with it nonchalantly. He was pretending he didn’t notice. You scratched your neck with your other hand and glued his sight to your skin. He remembered everything.

“What if what?”

“What if we slept together? It’s not like we’re in relationships, so we wouldn't be doing anything wrong… right?”

“I don’t have a girlfriend…”, he shook his head a little to emphasize this.

“Me neither. Or a boyfriend.”, you smiled.

You were getting closer and closer. He felt a hint of a fruit scent. Was that your shampoo? Your finger touched his neck. Very lightly, but a shiver went down his spine. Your touch was hot on his skin and he immediately started to want more.

Fuck.Fuck.Fuck.

You took your hand away, like you realised what you were doing and that was way too far and too fast. For a second you panicked, a train of thoughts was attacking you and you felt like you were the only one that was trying to do something there. Like you were the only one who felt the spark and wanted to use it. Like he didn’t want you anymore.

He raised his head a little, he looked straight into your eyes, his mouth was slightly open.

You were wrong. You were so fucking wrong.

You leaned into him and you kissed him without another word. He didn’t oppose at all. After all, if you hadn't, he would have done that himself. He cupped your face and pulled you closer. One of his hands wandered to your neck. He also felt yours on his, it went straight back to its place where it had been before. He tasted like beer and tea at the same time. You felt the alcohol in his breath but didn’t care much. You took his lower lip between yours and sucked. You felt him smiling, he liked that.

One of his hands grabbed your T-shirt and pulled you closer to him. It made you lose your balance and you put your hand on his chest for support. He didn’t stop though. He was trying to get you as close as possible.

Without thinking much, you straddled his lap, putting one leg on each side of his hips. His hands were immediately on your bare thighs. Kneading the flesh he moved them up, right on your ass. Grabbing you shorts, he pulled them right up, putting both of your ass cheeks on display. Holding them, made you move closer and spread your legs wider. You sat right up above his crotch, feeling his hardening dick under your thigh.

Grabbing his hoodie and by pulling it up you urged him to raise his hands, to take it off. He was wearing a simple white T-shirt beneath it. Tight enough to show his slim body and wide shoulders. He didn’t give you much time to appreciate it. Both of his hands were on your neck and pulled you back to him. He was kissing you like crazy, with his tongue exploring your mouth, not giving you any moment to take a breath. One of his hands slid down your shoulder and was going down, until he found the hem of your T-shirt. You felt his fingers on your stomach, shyly first. He was tasting the waters, making sure you were ok with that. Shortly after his whole hand was holding you around your ribcage with his both hands. Circling his thumbs under your breasts, he was slowly moving them up after he found your nipples.

“I want to see them again.”, his voice was so low, you barely recognized it.

You whispered a soft “OK” to him and he moved his hands up. T-shirt hooked on his wrist moved up with them. He put it through your head and hooked it on your neck. He didn’t have to do more. He got what he wanted. When he was undressing you, you lifted your hips up and he made you stay that way. Your breasts were right in front of his face and without hesitation he attached his lips to one of them. He licked your nipple, making his tongue flat he slid it up and down, making you moan. He looked up to you, wanting to see your facial expression, wanting to see how much you enjoyed that. He pinched your second nipple which made you whine even louder and his cock even harder. He remembered those sounds, now even more vivid to him, when he wasn’t that drunk.

While still working your breast with his mouth, his hand moved down, across your thigh, slowly getting closer to your center. THe loose hem of the leg of your shorts gave him easy access to you. His fingers found your core, still covered with your cotton panties, circling it, trying to get inside. Moving them to the side he finally felt how wet you were.

“Oh fuck… baby, is this all for me?”

You felt a heat rushing through your body. His words made you flustered for some reason, like saying it made it even more real and undeniable. You didn’t know what to say so you blindly shifted your hand to his crotch and found his cock. You started to palm him through his pants, which made him groan. You felt his hot breath and tongue on your skin. But it wasn’t enough. His fingers found your clit and started to slowly move up and down. You made a noise which gave him the perfect confirmation he was doing a good job. Without any further delay you unzipped him and shoved your hand into his pants. He was already hard and precum was gathering on his tip. He slowed his movements when he felt your hand on him, a little unsure what your next move was. You slid his pants and boxer shorts down and freed him. His hard dick slapped into his stomach and you immediately grabbed it and started to pump him. Your hand was sliding on his soft skin, smearing the precum all over him. He started to breathe loud and move his hand on you again.

You were so wet, you felt it on your thighs. He was touching your clit, sometimes circling it, something sliding up down, left and right. One of his fingers slid inside of you, feeling no resistance. After that the second one joined him, making you stretch a little. You barely felt it. When he started to move them in and out of you, your hips joined them, copying his pace. You didn’t forget about this cock in your hand. He bucked up into your fist when you sped up. He wasn’t able to focus on your nipples anymore. His face landed between your breast, his hot breath made a drop of sweat gather right there. He was whispering sweet nothings to you, you didn’t even understand them.

You were already chasing your orgasm. The very well known feeling started to build in your stomach and you were desperate to feel it. His fingers were doing wonders on you, circling your clit in a steady pace. You moved your hips closer but his other hand grabbed your hip and held you. You leaned towards him, hid your face in his neck, kissing and sucking the skin. You were focusing on the pleasure he was giving you but still wanted to return the favour. You speed up the pace of your own hand, squeezing his dick hard and making him moan right into your ear. He was getting close like you. You focused on the tip, circling with your thumb on his slit, wanting to make him cum. He was starting to breath faster and louder, squeezing your hip, digging his fingers into your flesh.

Then you heard it. A loud noise, which snapped you from your bliss and made your high disappear in a blink of an eye. He’d heard it too. His hand between your legs froze, but still stayed in place.

“Was that… from Jimin’s room?”, you asked, completely confused.

Sweat on Namjoon’s face ran down his cheek and ended up on this neck. He was as confused as you were. He’d heard it too and had no idea what that was.

“I-I need to check that.”

When you moved to leave his lap, he whined and grabbed your hand. He didn’t want to stop, he was so close. His own hand was still in your panties, fingers wet with your arousal ready to get back to work and get you off. You were so tempted to go for it, ignore the noise and forget about everything. But you heard it again. This time you were certain it was from Jimin’s room. He probably woke up.

You had no other choice but to leave Namjoon’s hard dick alone and stand up. He didn’t like that idea but he finally let you go. His hand left your center and went straight to his mouth. He put his fingers inside and sucked them clean, while looking into your eyes the whole time. This time you whined loudly and cursed Jimin for this.

When you were on your legs again, you put your T-shirt down and went to your roommate’s room. Before you opened the door, you felt Namjoon behind you, his hand landed on your shoulders. You both got inside and discovered Jimin was nowhere to be found. His bed was empty,

“... da fuck…”

And for some reason, Jimin’s pants were on the floor. You had no memory of undressing him, or Namjoon doing that. Did he wake up and take them off? What for? And how? You both were shocked, until you went around the bed and found him on the floor. He was laying on his stomach, with one hand twisted in a very uncomfortable angle, wearing his T-shirt and boxer shorts. The plastic bowl you left for him was pushed away, but still empty.

You kneeled next to him, checking if he was okay. He was still breathing, but he left unconscious. Namjoon came to you and helped you to put him on his bed again. You rolled him on his back and covered him with a comforter. He was safe again, although you were really puzzled about what had just happened. You were pretty sure Jimin would not remember this, he was way too drunk, so there was no chance you’d find out anyway. You sighed, put the bowl back to its place and left the room, with Namjoon following you.

When both of you were outside, you quietly closed the door yet again. You felt Namjoon’s hand on you, how he grabbed you by your shoulder and turned you around to him. Your back hit the wall and his body was pressed into yours immediately, pushing air from your lunges. He grabbed your breast and squeezed it, pushing you even harder into the wall. His kiss was long and passionate but when he detached his lips he just stayed like that, looking at you through his lashes.

‘Why the hell do you have to be such a good kisser?”, he whispered into your lips.

You felt his boner on your stomach and reached out to touch him again. But he moved away. He kissed you one last time and took a step back. Still looking at you, took a deep breath and turned to the living room. Your mind was still hazy with the intense make out, so you didn’t follow him on the spot. But when you did, he wasn’t sitting on the couch but standing in front of the coffee table. He took his tea and started to drink. In one take, he finished it and put the empty mug back. After that he took his hoodie, walked past you, opened the door and left.

It was the second time he was leaving you like this.

------

“What came up?”, Jimin put a bag of tea in your mug and poured boiling water. You both smelled the scent of green tea. “I thought you’re free today.“

“I am. I-I just don’t want to leave the house tonight.”

“It’s barely noon. You can still change your mind.”

“Yeah, yeah…”

You started to rummage through another cabinet, looking for some cookies. But you couldn’t stop looking at your phone’s screen. Jimin was watching you and noticed how much you were distracted. No wonder you'd broken THE MUG.

“Why are you staring at your phone like that?”

Automatically you did it again. Unread messages’ thumbnails looked at you, asking why you hesitate to read their whole content.

With a loud crash you closed the cabinet, took your phone and headed to your room.

“I’m going to my room. I need to take care of this.”

Without any more explanation, you took your tea, left the kitchen and locked yourself in your room. When left alone, you took a deep breath and finally unlocked your phone.

Messages on your phone manifested in front of you and at the point you were certain you read them correctly at the first time.

Unknown [12:36]: You know, I’ve been thinking… We should drink some tea together again

Unknown [12:36]: I’d love to see what next is gonna happen with us in one room

Unknown [12:40]: It’s Namjoon btw

雀

#bts #bts smut #bts x reader #bts imagine #bangtan #bangtan smut #bangtan x reader #bangtan imagine #namjoon #kim namjoon #namjoon smut #namjoon x reader #namjoon imagine #jimin #jimin smut #jimin x reader #jimin imagine

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alpacaparkaseok · 4 years

Text

Mine

3. Stalk me all you want, just bring refreshments.

Genre: Yoongi x OC

Warnings: some stalking lol

Word Count: 3.1k

We’ve made it to Paris by the time the first stalker finds me.

The past week has been spent in England popping in and out of interviews and press conferences. For the most part, it’s been pretty quiet. Granted, each interview never fails to bring up BTS, one even going so far as to pull up a quiz to see how similar I am to Suga.

I got 62%.

Sebastian demanded to take it as well. He got 43%. I still can’t tell if he was relieved or upset. Either way, things have been a little strange between us ever since that morning when he woke me up post panic attack. I can’t tell if it’s just because we’ve both got a lot of things on our minds or the fact that we’re back in civilization now, but I find myself seeking out the company of friends through phone calls and facetimes more often.

Stacey has been working nonstop to deflate the situation as much as possible. Truly, I owe her everything. She’s quick to remind me just that as I make my way to my hotel room.

“You know, this is very different from any other case I’ve had before. This fanbase is hard to get around.”

I roll my eyes even though she can’t see me from the other end of the phone. “You really have to stop referring to this as a case. It sounds like I’m some type of criminal.”

Sebastian passes me to go to his room while I fumble with my keycard. Stacey is in the middle of explaining the reasoning behind calling this a case when I finally open up the door and nearly drop the phone at the sight before me.

A girl sits on the edge of the bed, phone held up and hat low on her head. She stands up, walking over to me.

“Look who it is! Cara Richie!” For her surprised tone, I know she isn’t surprised at all. Stacey pauses on the phone as she picks up on the other voice. I remain frozen in the doorway, utterly confused. Did I get the wrong room?

Sebastian is the first one to react. “Keep your head down Car, and walk over here. Come into my room, I’ll get security.”

I do as he says, hesitating only a moment longer before turning my head down and heading down the hall. Stacey is demanding answers in my ear, but I can’t bring myself to answer her. Not as the girl is rushing out the door in an attempt to capture more footage.

“You think just because you’re a pretty face that Yoongi would be interested in you? He probably felt bad for your sorry excuse of a career and wanted to help. How do you feel about being a pity case?”

The words fling themselves at my back, but I focus on putting one step in front of the other. Sebastian is speaking quickly on the phone, motioning for me to walk faster.

“C’mon, c’mon…” He mutters under his breath, opening his door wide.

“I think you should know that this is live on Instagram. You look like a coward. Why would he like a coward like you?”

My feet refuse to move faster, my measly pace being the only thing I can manage. There’s a piece of me that really wants to turn around and give her a piece of my mind, but I know that’s the last move I should take. Not when she’s filming. Not when we’re just beginning promotions and my career is already barely hanging in there.

When I’m within arm’s reach, Sebastian grabs me and hauls me into the room. I just glimpse the dark clothing of security bursting out of the stairwell before Sebastian closes the door behind us.

“What was that?” Stacey demands to know. I watch as Sebastian scours the room, checking the bathroom and even under the covers for any unwanted visitors. Once he gives me a thumbs-up, I finally speak.

“I...I think that girl was stalking me.”

🌙

To say the least, Paris and I don’t get along well. Yes, the world-famous city of love. The irony of it all isn’t lost on me. I’m stuck in the city of love all the while trying my best to avoid crazed would-be lovers of some man I’ve only ever seen through a screen.

On the bright side, people who work for the tabloids are having a heyday. I haven’t managed to get my hands on any of the magazines they’re working for, but I do have a phone and said phone is in a constant state of buzzing and ringing.

One the down side I still have no clue how I’m supposed to make it through these promotions in one piece. A part of me hopes that BTS will step in and basically tell everyone to knock it off, but I have no way of knowing how their PR teams works. Either way, they seem to be very good at keeping things on their side very quiet while my side is barely holding the barricade.

We’re driving back from an interview when my phone rings yet again. Sebastian looks at me.

“You gonna answer that?”

Sighing, I yank my phone out of my pocket. No doubt it’s yet another nosy friend or reporter that got my number from a nosy friend.

“Oh!” I gasp. It’s an actual friend. “Bong-Cha!” I all but scream into the phone. It’s my crazy roommate from my senior year in college that convinced me to pursue another degree with her in Seoul.

“Wow, you actually sound happy to hear from me,” my friend teases.

“There’s a first time for everything. How are you?” It feels like it’s been years since we’ve last spoken.

Sebastian looks at me with a puzzled expression as I slip into Korean. I’ve never spoken it around him, but I’ve never had a reason to. In fact, it’s about time I got a call from my friend. I need to keep practicing.

“I’m...great.”

I furrow my brows as I study the Parisian streets we pass. “Are you sure about that?”

Bong-cha’s sigh carries through the phone. “Yeah, I think so. It’s just...remember when I told you before you left for the Congo that I had a really big gig coming up? Like, really big?”

The conversation we had less than a week before I left for the Congo comes back to my mind. Bong-cha and I originally went into the university to study acting. When we were both accepted to a prestigious school in Seoul she was elated and I was confused. I didn’t apply to the school. I didn’t even speak the language, why would I apply? Bong-cha took things into her own hands and filled out the application for me. It took a lot of puppy eyes and convincing, but eventually I realized that a fresh start on a new continent and even with a new language would be exactly what I needed.

The program took two years, but it only took Bong-cha six months to realize that she wanted to focus more on the music part of filming rather than the actual acting. The little punk switched programs, but we still lived together for the duration of the two years. Looking back, she made the right decision. She can weave and create a soundtrack that puts people under a spell. She even helped with the soundtrack for one of my very first indie flicks.

Thanks to her I had something of an advantage going into the world of cinema with both American and Korean acting experience. But the best part of it all was the building up a friendship that will last for decades.

“Yeah,” I come out of my walk down memory lane. Paris somehow makes me nostalgic. “What happened with that? How did it go?”

“Well, it went well...it wasn’t exactly for a movie, though.”

“What was it for, then?” I can sense the hesitation in her tone and urge her forward. “Are you releasing a mixtape or something?” We both chuckle at the notion.

“No, not that. Although I would take the world by storm if I decided to drop a mixtape. It would be pure genius.”

“Yeah, yeah. What was it for? Now you’ve made me curious.”

Another sigh. “I was working on a comeback trailer for BTS.”

My heart stutters for a moment. “You- you what?”

“I know, and I should have told you all of this-”

“Daebak!” I shout into the car, Sebastian jumping a little at my sudden exclamation. “That’s so cool, Bong-cha! I can’t believe you didn’t tell me before!”

“Oh, yeah. Yeah, it is amazing, isn’t it? They’re kind of going for this intense dystopian feel and somebody recommended me to them because they’d seen ‘True Lies’, isn’t that great? I still can’t believe it.”

Bong-cha deserves every ounce of credit that comes her way, I couldn’t be happier for her. Then I remember my current situation, and the questions I’m dying to ask her are all jumping for attention. I bite them down, reminding myself that this isn’t about me.

“I told you that the soundtrack for ‘True Lies’ was perfect, didn’t I? See, you should listen to me more often.”

A half-hearted chuckle from the other end of the phone. “I guess I should. But Cara, that’s not the only reason I called. I think I may have screwed something up.”

If my heart keeps stuttering I may die. Trying not to jump to any conclusions, I struggle to keep the apprehension out of my voice. “Ok...what happened?”

“Well...I worked a lot with all the boys, they’re very hands on in the whole process.”

“Ok.”

“I especially worked a lot with Suga because he’s very talented at producing music and all that, so he had a lot of say in the overall vibe and feel of the piece. Anyways, as you can imagine, we had to spend a lot of time together and we actually became pretty good friends...”

A yellow bike is being parked in a bike rack painted with red flowers and vines. It’s outside of the kind of cafe you only see in movies, and a young woman sits by the window with a book in hand. She’s lost in thought, no longer looking down at her book but instead watching the cars as they pass by. One hand rests idly around her drink which is still full. We make eye contact for a single second before I speed by, and I know that I’ll never see her again but I can’t help but wish I was her.

If I were her I could sit there calmly, not worried about much except for not spilling my drink on my novel. I would admire the yellow bike in the rack, and think up bike routes that I could enjoy. I would pack my book in the little basket between the handlebars and I would wait for a sunny day to go out and read.

Just my bike, book, and me.

Jumping a little as we pass over a speed bump I’m ripped from my alternate reality and drink in the words that Bong-cha speaks as delicately as possible.

“...we talked a lot, and eventually I started talking about my friends. You know, pretty normal, isn’t it? Everyone talks about their best friends. I mentioned you, of course. Explained how we lived together for however long, like what, four years? Two in the states and two in Seoul? Anyways, I was going on about you because ‘Under Nine’ has been so huge and it’s like you finally had your big break.”

Coaxing my jaw to move from its stiff position, I form a sentence. “Bong-cha, just tell me.”

There’s a two second pause before she dives back in. “He’d seen the film, said that you seemed cool. And I just started thinking about it and I thought that you two would be so cute together. And he just seems...lonely. Is that weird? And you’re always so stressed with trying to find the next big project so I just talked you up but...I- I didn’t tell him to date you or anything, I swear! I just said that you two should be friends. That’s all, I swear.”

Somehow the spike in heart rate I was expecting never comes. Instead, I almost feel more at ease. At least I’m starting to understand how this got started. It all seemed too disconnected before, like he just picked my name out of a hat and decided to have some fun with it.

“So...do you know why he said those things in the interview? Because that wasn’t exactly a call for friendship. At least, if that’s how he meant it, he failed. Big time. And now I’m paying the price.”

I can’t keep the bite out of my voice toward the end, and Sebastian doesn’t need to be fluent in the language to understand that tone.

‘You ok?’ he mouths. I nod and roll my neck in an attempt to relax. I don’t want Bong-cha to think that I’m mad at her. If anything, I’m flattered that she even thought to act as a sponsor for me to one of the most famous rappers in the world, however misguided her intentions.

“I know. I know, trust me, I talked to him about it.”

I wasn’t expecting that. They must be pretty good friends if Bong-cha feels comfortable calling him out on this. “You did?”

She chuckles. “I know, shocking. I just feel partially responsible for all of this. Then when I saw that video in your hotel room-”

“Wait, you saw that? I thought they were able to take that down in time.”

“Well, it was live when she was filming it. So she had to stop the filming but it was already out in the world. If it makes you feel any better, most people feel bad for you. You reacted really well in the video. Didn’t even say anything. Yoongi felt horrible when-”

“Hold up, hold up.” The words tumble from my mouth before she can continue. “You’re telling me that he actually saw that? And you talked to him about all of this? What is he saying?”

“I would tell you if you would quit interrupting me.”

“Sorry.” A hint of a smile tugs at my lips, the head strong Bong-cha I know so well reappearing.

“Anyways, as I was saying he felt horrible once he saw the video. Obviously we knew that it was probably a little crazy for you, especially with interviews and stuff. But I think even the guys were surprised to hear about you having stalkers and stuff.”

“The guys as in…”

“As in the guys. Jin and Jimin and-”

“Yeah. Yep. Got it.” I’m not sure whether I should laugh or cry, so I settle for shock.

“I talked to Yoongi about it, though. They all feel horrible about it, really. I guess after I talked about you so much he got curious and started doing some research and trying to figure out who you were. You know, kind of like friend shopping.”

“Is that a thing?”

“Sure, when you’re that crazy famous it is. You have to make sure the person you want to befriend isn’t some psycho in disguise.”

I snort. “I am a psycho, though. I don’t even try to hide it.”

Bong-cha chuckles, in full agreement with me. “Trust me, I know. But I don’t know, maybe he thinks it’s endearing? I mean, look at his closest friends. Compared to the rest of the members, you’re pretty tame. They’re all nuts.”

Just from the way Bong-cha speaks about the band I can tell that she really loved spending her time working with them. It would appear they all became fast friends. I can’t say that surprises me; she’s always had a knack for making friends.

“Alright, if you say so.”

“Anyways, I guess the guys were just giving him a hard time because he was always watching your stuff. Everyone took it too far in that interview. I mean, honestly speaking, I think they want him to get a girlfriend as badly as I do, but,” she keeps chattering away as she senses my impending interruption, “they realize that this wasn’t the best way to go about everything. Trust me when I say that their agency practically skinned them alive when the interview went viral.”

I suppose it makes sense to a certain point, but there’s still one outlier in all this information. If this is purely just an innocent mistake, then why on earth would Yoongi fan the flame by inviting us to the film festival in Seoul? And publicly RSVP?

I ask Bong-cha as much, the skepticism thick in my voice. “I just don’t get it, I guess.”

Bong-cha curses on the other side, and I can practically see her rolling her eyes. “That is precisely why all of the boys have basically been in time out for the past couple of weeks. Remember when I said that the other boys want Yoongi to get moving as much as I do?”

“Yeah? I don’t follow…”

Bong-cha laughs at the situation, the sound of it only worrying me more. “That wasn’t Yoongi that invited you guys and RSVPd.”

I nearly choke at the new information. The anger I feel is red-hot. Somebody really is trying to sabotage my career, aren’t they? “W-who? Who would do that? Why haven’t they said anything about that? Clearly someone is trying to ruin my career, and possibly his as well. Wouldn’t BigHit do someth-”

“Hey! Listen to me you psycho!” Bong-cha yells through the phone, barely able to get me to shut up for more than two seconds. “Are you even listening to me at all? I just said that the others are pushing for you and Yoongi, too. Nobody is trying to destroy your career.” She pauses, and for once I don’t interrupt her. Instead I wait with bated breath for her to continue. “You should have seen Yoongi’s face when Jin told him what he did.”

Jin? Kim Seokjin? What did he do?

“What do you mean? What did Jin do?”

A sigh of long-suffering. “He’s the one that invited you guys. And made sure Yoongi would have to be there to face you by publicly RSVPing him. Got it?”

“Why would he do that?” I ask myself the question more than anything. Bong-cha still responds though, the smirk evident in her tone.

“You’ll just have to ask him in person when you get here, won’t you? Make sure you save me a seat. I want to be there for this.”

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nautiscarader · 3 years

Text

Nautiscarader’s Wendip Week day 4: Lost key

Wendy and Dipper find and old drive-in cinema with a locked cabinet inside the projector room...

"lost key" really has almost no connection to the story, it was just excuse to use an idea I've had for a while ;)

One summer the two decided to put their passion for old cheesy movies (the worst they could find (la la la)) to action and try to refurbish and old drive in cinema. It worked for exactly one night, because the projector was haunted.

(Ao3)

===================

Dipper Pines has seen a lot of strange things around Gravity Falls: ancient buildings, communes of magical creatures, tasty fat-free food, you name it. And yet, on occasions like these, despite his years of expertise, he was still stumped by his findings.

- Why would anyone build a huge empty billboard in the middle of the woods?

He scratched his head, walking around a huge once-white rectangle, propped between trees that now have overgrown it, blocking it from sight. Only because of its unnaturally light colour he and Wendy have managed to spot it during one of their many walks around the forest.

And it was Wendy that very quickly made him realise that the thing he was looking at was not exactly what he thought it to be.

- Dude, it's a screen! - she exclaimed - This must have been a drive-in theatre!

She spread her arms, and only now Dipper realised how oddly flat the meadow they were on was. He then noticed more and more evidence of her being right: rusty, metal poles he thought to be part of some fences, turned out to be holders for old speakers, though with very little electronics left.

And a huge, moss-covered rock was revealed to be a half-dilapidated carcass of a car that served as a home to some birds that flew way when Dipper uncovered it.

But there was one more mystery, and Wendy was on it, carefully looking around.

- If that's the screen, then the projector must be...

She turned around trying to spot it in the thick forest that have overgrown the place.

- There! Look!

Wendy pointed to a building on a nearby hill they previously thought to be just an abandoned shelter. But a rectangular hole in its wall, pointing towards the screen proved her right once more.

- Jackpot! - Dipper shouted - Let's check it out.

The two didn't have to break in - the door have succumbed to the passage of time years ago, giving Wendy and Dipper a mesmerising sight of an old projector room, filled with antiquated technology, frozen in time, as if they were the first people to explore it.

- Dude... do you think it still works? - Wendy suddenly spoke, as she looked through the hole in the wall at the place they've just left.

The answer became obvious when Dipper pulled the large handle on the wall, and with low, buzzing noise, the equipment woke up from its slumber, though Dipper put it back to sleep, knowing well not to test a potential fire-hazard too much.

- That's awesome! Do you know what that means? - Er, no... - We could, I don't know, renovate this place! This could be a new local attraction!

Dipper's eyes widened.

- You know, this isn't a bad idea! We would need some movies first, though...

He looked around, until he heard Wendy's playful grunt. The red-head was pointing out to a locked, metal cabinet with "Movies" written on it.

- Jackpot again... er, we just need to find a key.

He pointed to the rather imposing paddlock on the door. Wendy snickered.

- Stay back, man, I've got this.

She grabbed her axe and with a precise move, she hit the rusty piece of metal that practically turned to dust, and with a loud clunking noise, the door moved.

Wendy and Dipper eagerly grabbed each wing and opened it ajar, revealing rows of old circular reels of film, covered in only a thin layer of dust, preserved by time.

Dipper grabbed one of them, and gently blew the dust away, revealing the title.

- "Hare goulash"? - he raised his brow - From 1933... wow, this place is from the forties! Old as heck. - Maybe it's old, but it's still one of our finest!

With a loud, cluttering noise, Dipper dropped the metal reel to the ground when a third voice joined theirs. Wendy jumped back as well, and readied her weapon, though she was not quite prepared for what she saw.

A ghost with thick, bushy eyebrows and a moustache appeared from between the reels of old movies, wearing a tuxedo, a bowtie and a comically large glasses.

- Woah, lady, be careful with that axe, I've already cut down on my smoking!

He pointed a ghostly cigar at her and, contrary to his own words, took it back into his mouth, much to both Dipper's and Wendy's confusion.

- Who are you? - Me? I should be asking you, I didn't know the circus was back in town! You are the weirdest travelling salespeople we've had in years! - Er... we?

Wendy asked the question, just as the answers revealed themselves to them. With more cluttering, two more spectres materialised from the storage closet, one wearing a bowler hat and the other a rather tarnished cylinder, eyeing the two living beings with eerie, wide-eyed stares.

- Woah, nelly, are we back in action? - the second ghost asked - I sure hope they haven't invented color movies, I only have black and white clothes!

The third ghost didn't say anything, but filled the room with melodious tune of his flute, at least until he looked at Wendy, and whistled loudly.

- Hey, watch out! - Dipper stepped forward. - Watch? - the first ghost chimed back, floating around her - Aren't you the ones to do so? We're the actors here! - What the-

Dipper yelped when his vision was obscured by his own vest being tossed over his head by the other two ghosts.

- Well, great, now the spectres have spectators! So, what are you kids doing here? Cos' I hate to break it you, you ain't gonna sell us any cookies to us.

The ghost with rather thick, bushy eyebrows sat, or rather levitated over the chair and produced a large cloud of smoke from what would be his lungs.

- We've just found this place. - Dipper explained, fixing his clothes - So, do you guys live here?

A loud, horn noise filled the room when one of the ghost produced one from nowhere and honked it at Dipper.

- Time-out for the nosy one! You don't say "live" to a ghost, you know. - Okay, okay - Wendy continued - Were you guys locked in this closet? - No complaints from me - the middle ghost answered - I can't imagine a better company than these two.

He hugged his two ghostly friends, much to their displeasure.

- Imagine that happening for sixty years. And he's the one who thinks he can sing! - Er, do you... do you guys have names? - Moustachio, at my service! - the moustache-wearing one bowed, and reached for Wendy's hand, only to grab and kiss his own. - Chorizo! - the second one lifted his hat, revealing two ghostly mice living underneath it - And this one's Honky, you can guess why.

Another loud sound, this time from a trombone filled the room, when Honky greeted Dipper and played his ghostly instrument.

- Okay, that's-that's neat... I guess. I'm Dipper, and this is Wendy.

Dipper introduced them to the ghosts, still standing a few feet away from them.

- We, uh, we were thinking if we could renovate this place... - Why? Are these cobwebs out of fashion?

The ghost grabbed both ends of his moustache and spread it apart, revealing several ghost spiders on an impressive grid of cobwebs.

- Ew! Stop it!

Wendy automatically swiped her axe, slicing the ghost in half.

- Hey, if you think I need to get back on a diet, you could have just told me! - Chorizo spoke, tugging his lower part back as if it was his pants. - No, you don't get it - Dipper continued - Wendy... Wendy just had an idea that we could bring this place back to li-, I mean, make it work again. - So we could play your movies again! They are all yours, right? - Hey, this one's bright! - Chorizo said, putting sunglasses onto his nose. - Hmm...

Moustachio twirled the end of his whiskers, until he grabbed his two ghostly friends.

- Team meeting! And you two, no peeking!

The see-through ghost turned around and he whispered something to the other two. Chorizo chimed in after a while, and sad tune of violin meant Honky gave his vote on the matter.

After just a few seconds, the three turned around and faced Wendy and Dipper.

- After long and heated discussion we came to a *clear* conclusion. - Moustachio spoke - We're old, you're young, so we hate you by definition. Get out of our lawn, it was nice meeting you!

And with that, the ghosts grabbed Wendy and Dipper and unceremoniously tossed them out of the bunker-like building, closing what remained of the door right in front of their nose.

- Oh, you little-

Wendy got up at once and tried kicking the dilapidated door open.

- Is that the pizza? It better be, it's been half a century! - Open up, you old farts! - Wendy roared - Uh, Wen-Wendy? - Dipper gently nudged her - Maybe we shouldn't be interrupting them...? - Are you kidding me? We could make this place running and have fun, and these three weirdos think they own the place. - Uh, maybe they do? - Dipper raised his brow - I mean, it looks like this place has a whole set of their movies...

Wendy gave him a disappointed stare.

- I thought you were on with this plan... - Uh, Wendy, listen - he quickly corrected himself - I like watching old movies with you, but you know, at your place. I don't need- - But wouldn't it be more fun? To see them on big screen? - We could just... go to the regular movies, you know.

Wendy's smile faded away.

- You're no fun...

She kicked a nearby rock and turned around, and began walking down the hill.

- We-Wendy, wait!

Dipper slid after her, trying not to tumble down.

- Okay, let's-let's say I'm up with... this crazy plan. How could we do this?

Wendy's freckled face lightened, gracing Dipper with a beaming smile. She reached to her pocket and took her phone out.

- Well, answer this: who are you gonna call?

Dipper's eyes widened, as he understood her plan.

- Oh, great, phoneboxes can fit in a pocket now! Hope the bills are equally small. - Moustachio said, appearing out of the ground.

Several hours and one phonecall later, Wendy and Dipper came back to the abandoned drive-in theater, equipped with the best vacuum cleaners they could get.

The two shared knowing looks, nodded and stormed inside the projector room, ready to kick the ghosts' non-existent butts.

- Oh, good, we were waiting for you! We needed a fourth one. - Moustachio, Chorizo and Honky tossed their cards into the air, as the three left their card game. - And the small one can be the joker! - Hey! - Wendy stepped forward - Don't you ever call him that...

She turned on the portable vaccum cleaner and with a steady hand, aimed it at the three, with Dipper quickly joining her, sucking the stale air, and the ghosts with it.

The three spectres let out sharp yells (Honky using a triangle), and grabbed a nearby rail, as their bodies stretched and thinned, being sucked into the machines Dipper and Wendy pointed at them.

But as the two were sure of their victory, the three ghosts escaped their grip with ease, proving they were never in any danger at all, laughing and pointing at the teenagers, floating freely above them.

- Oh come on, using Hoovers to get rid of ghosts? - Moustachio rolled his eyes - We were the ones making comedies for fifty years, and even that plot is too silly for us. - And I bet you didn't even change the bags, we're kinda sick of the dust and all! - Oh, we were not going to trap you here...

Wendy and Dipper smiled at the same time, reaching into their pockets.

- Don't you know that cameras can trap souls?

And with that, the room was illuminated with flashes of light, as the two began shooting the ghosts with photo after photo, making them twist and writhe in after-agony.

A loud piano tune broke the silence, as Honky waved a white flag.

- Alright, alright, stop doing that! - Moustachio yelled - We've already sold our souls to Hollywood, who knows how much we have left.

At once, Dipper and Wendy lowered their "weapons", still wearing the same cocky smiles.

- So, you youngsters want to spend a night at a cinema, eh? Well, I guess it's yours, we can haunt a vaudeville or something. - Nah, you can stay here. - Wendy eagerly countered - We just wanted to do some cleaning...

The two raised their vacuum cleaners and turned them on, this time pointing to the dusty, dusty floor.

===========

It took Dipper a better part of the day cleaning the projector room, and the next four or five days restoring the parking lot.

Wendy offered to cut down the trees that have overgrown the place, and she came back the next day with a few benches made out of the same wood, as the place was certainly not up for any cars anymore.

Dipper took care of the electric circuits, making sure the place was up to the modern standards ("You don't want to know how much worse the Health and Safety inspectors are in the afterlife, kiddo!").

Wendy also nicked some fresh white bedsheets and used them to repair the white screen to properly display the movie.

By the end of a week of tiring work, the theater, though still looking old, was at least brought to a working state, with Wendy and Dipper excited to be it first customers, before opening it to the public.

They walked into the projector room, where the three ghosts turned on the machine, lighting up the glade with white light. But as Dipper was about to pick up a reel of a movie, Moustachio grabbed it and absorbed them into his see-through body, together with the rest of the collection.

- Hey! What gives? - Wendy shouted back. - You know, we gave it a thought, and we're not just gonna play the movies for ya'. - Moustachio spoke - I figured out how to retroactively file a copyright claim on our movies! They're no longer in public domain, they're in boo-blic domain.

The three ghosts grinned.

- If you want to run this cinema, now you have to pay us! - And we will adjust for inflation! - Chorizo added. - What? No! - We should bust you again just because of that joke. - Dipper added - And besides, who told you how to do that?

By now, Dipper should have learned not to ask questions about money in Gravity Falls.

- Hiya kids! - Grunkle Stan?!

Wendy and Dipper roared in disbelief, as the old entrepreneur casually walked into the room, playfully swinging his cane.

- I see you've met my pals! - he grinned jovially and closed his arm around the ghosts in a brotherly hug. - And I gotta tell you, I have huge plans for this place. Look, I stole some microchips or whatnot from Ford and glued them to the cups.

He tilted a large styrofoam cup he was holding, proudly presenting a small, sparkling device underneath it.

- And apparently, now you cannot get refills! You have to buy a new drink every time! And I only kinda understand how it works!

He burst into maniacal laughter, dragging his ghostly friends with him. The men laughed and walked out of the projector room, though only one of them was able to do it without colliding into a wall.

- Well, looks like this is it.

Dipper sighed and turned away, kicking a half-century old can. But he quickly felt Wendy's hand on his shoulder, as she stopped him.

- Maybe... but guess who made camrips of their movies?

She waved her phone, and Dipper's face brightened, before they too burst into a fit of giggles. With the prize in their hand, the two teenagers were soon running away to a much cozier place.

A few minutes later, they were sitting in the dilapidated car, in front of now-empty screen, their faces illuminated by the light of the cellphone. The two laughed, as an actor from the bygone days said the same joke for the fifth time in a row, getting his face plastered with a pie.

- Hey, Dipper? - Wendy suddenly asked, in the middle of a musical number - Yeah? - Thanks for everything. And for... you know, helping me out. - Yeah, shame it didn't work. - Hey, it wasn't that bad. We've had some fun, didn't we?

Even though her face was half-hidden in shadows, Dipper could see a faint blush, contrasting with her gleaming, emerald eyes, which in turn made his cheeks match her.

Their faces got closer and closer, and suddenly, the warm August night became as hot as noon in the middle of a heatwave. And just as their lips were about to meet, they were drowned in white, bright light and they jumped in their seats as the old speaker crackled with a high-pitched noise.

The two looked at the sign projected on to the screen, and groaned, when the ghost repeated those words.

- Kissing costs extra five bucks!

#nautiscaraderfics #wendipweek #wendip week #wendip #wendy corduroy #dipper pines #gravity falls

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firstfullmoon · 4 years

Note

sorry if this has been asked before, but what are your favorite quotes about (romantic) love?

• “I love you. I want us both to eat well.”

— Christopher Citro, from “Our Beautiful Life When It’s Filled with Shriek”

• “You kiss the back of my legs and I want to cry. Only the sun has come this close, only the sun.”

— Shauna Barbosa, from “GPS”

• “August. We were arguing. You want love to be like this every day don’t you? 92 degrees even in the shade.”

“I used to be a hopeless romantic. I am still a hopeless romantic. I used to believe that love was the highest value. I still believe that love is the highest value. I don’t expect to be happy. I don’t imagine that I will find love, whatever that means, or that if I do find it, it will make me happy. I don’t think of love as the answer or the solution. I think of love as a force of nature - as strong as the sun, as necessary, as impersonal, as gigantic, as impossible, as scorching as it is warming, as drought-making as it is life-giving. And when it burns out, the planet dies.”

“If love is going to be done differently I will have to do it. I don’t mean as a messiah-thing, I mean as a me-thing. I want to look into your eyes and not get blown up. I want you to see me as I am and not destroy me. I don’t want to retreat into plant life, or have the same bad dream every night. I don’t want to watch a city burn because I was there.”

— Jeanette Winterson

• “I’ll take care of you. / It’s rotten work. / Not to me. Not if it’s you.”

— from Anne Carson’s translation of Orestes

• “I think of you all the time and therefore have little to say that would not embarrass you, for instance my first feeling about the rain was that it was like you.”

— John Cage, from a letter to Merce Cunningham

• “I want you to know, if you ever read this, there was a time when I would rather have had you by my side than any one of these words; I would rather have had you by my side than all the blue in the world.”

— Maggie Nelson, Bluets

• “I want to be a village full of sweethearts, / as you are, every second of the day, / cooking me soups & drawing me pictures / & holding me, my inexplicable & elephant sadness, / with your infinite arms. / But isn’t it true, you are not / always why I am happy. & I promise / it is true, you are almost never why, / why I am sad.”

— Chen Chen, from “Elegy for My Sadness”

• “Look here Vita—throw over your man, and we’ll go to Hampton Court and dine on the river together and walk in the garden in the moonlight and come home late and have a bottle of wine and get tipsy, and I’ll tell you all the things I have in my head, millions, myriads — They won’t stir by day, only by dark on the river. Think of that. Throw over your man, I say, and come.”

“I always have such need to merely talk to you. Even when I have nothing to talk about – with you I just seem to go right ahead and sort of invent it. I invent it for you. Because I never seem to run out of tenderness for you and because I need to feel you near.”

“I could only think of you as being very distant and beautiful and calm. A lighthouse in clean waters.”

“What can one say — except that I love you and I’ve got to live through this strange quiet evening thinking of you sitting alone. Dearest — let me have a line… You have given me such happiness…”

— Virginia Woolf, from letters to Vita Sackville-West

• “I am reduced to a thing that wants Virginia. I composed a beautiful letter to you in the sleepless nightmare hours of the night, and it has all gone. I just miss you, in a quite simple desperate human way. I can’t be clever and stand-offish with you: I love you too much for that. Too truly. You have no idea how stand-offish I can be with people I don’t love. I have brought it to a fine art. But you have broken down my defences. And I don’t really resent it.”

“Please, in all this muddle of life, continue to be a bright and constant star. Just a few things remain as beacons: poetry, and you, and solitude.”

— Vita Sackville-West, from letters to Virginia Woolf

• “Love is awful. It’s awful. It’s painful. It’s frightening. It makes you doubt yourself, judge yourself, distance yourself from the other people in your life. It makes you selfish. It makes you creepy, makes you obsessed with your hair, makes you cruel, makes you say and do things you never thought you would do. It’s all any of us want, and it’s hell when we get there. So no wonder it’s something we don’t want to do on our own. I was taught if we’re born with love then life is about choosing the right place to put it. People talk about that a lot, feeling right, when it feels right it’s easy. But I’m not sure that’s true. It takes strength to know what’s right. And love isn’t something that weak people do. Being a romantic takes a hell of a lot of hope. I think what they mean is, when you find somebody that you love, it feels like hope.“

— Phoebe Waller-Bridge, in Fleabag

• “i carry your heart with me(i carry it inmy heart)”

— e.e. cummings, from “[i carry your heart with me(i carry it in]”

• “There was once a very great American surgeon named Halsted. He was married to a nurse. He loved her-immeasurably. One day Halsted noticed that his wife’s hands were chapped and red when she came back from surgery. And so he invented rubber gloves. For her. It is one of the great love stories in medicine. The difference between inspired medicine and uninspired medicine is love. When I met Ana I knew: I loved her to the point of invention.”

— Sarah Ruhl, The Clean House

• “oh god it’s wonderful / to get out of bed / and drink too much coffee / and smoke too many cigarettes / and love you so much”

— Frank O’Hara, from “Steps”

• “This morning there’s snow everywhere. We remark on it. You tell me you didn’t sleep well. I say I didn’t either. You had a terrible night. “Me too.” We’re extraordinarily calm and tender with each other as if sensing the other’s rickety state of mind. As if we knew what the other was feeling. We don’t, of course. We never do. No matter. It’s the tenderness I care about. That’s the gift this morning that moves and holds me. Same as every morning.”

— Raymond Carver, from “The Gift”

• “Well Marianne, it’s come to this time when we are really so old and our bodies are falling apart and I think I will follow you very soon. Know that I am so close behind you that if you stretch out your hand, I think you can reach mine.”

— Leonard Cohen, in a letter to Marianna Ihlen

• “I think about love on a scale from 1 to 10. Most of us find a 6 or a 7, and that’s why we have divorce. It’s the truth. We settle for that 6 or 7. But I like to think Kevin is Chiron’s 10. He’s found that and he realizes that there’s no reason to settle for a 6 or a 7 because, “I know this person is my 10. Whether or not this person believes I’m his 10, I’m going to devote my life to this person entirely.” That’s why the line where he says, “You’re the only man that’s ever touched me,” for me, was the most amazing, most beautiful thing I’ve seen in cinema, period. Because that’s what we strive for as people, to find that one person because they’re there. If Kevin doesn’t feel that they should be together, Chiron is just going to die a miserable person because that’s his person and he won’t settle for anything else.“

— Trevante Rhodes about Moonlight

• “I look at you and I would rather look at you than all the portraits in the world”

— Frank O’Hara, from “Having a Coke with You” but the whole poem is !

• “The door slammed and someone came home and low voices could be heard, the single lilt of a question as it rose, “How was it?” or “Are you hungry?” Something plain and necessary, yet extra, with care, a voice like those tiny roofs over the phone booths along the train tracks, the ones made from the same shingles used for houses, except only four rows wide—just enough to keep the phone dry. And maybe that’s all I wanted—to be asked a question and have it cover me, like a roof the width of myself.”

— Ocean Vuong, from On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous

• “I keep wishing for you, keep shutting up my eyes and looking toward the sky, asking with all my might for you, and yet you do not come. I thought of you, until the world grew rounder than it sometimes is, and I broke several dishes.”

— Emily Dickinson, in a letter to Minnie Holland

• “I don’t want you to be nervous. Maybe thinking of a walrus would help. Have you seen the video of the penguin accidentally stepping on a sleeping walrus? It thought it was a rock. The walrus wakes up like what the fuck and the penguin scurries off like oh shit. Sometimes it’s funny watching a surprise happen, and not just funny but kind of amazing — like, you never really know what’s what when it comes to this planet.

Then again, when it’s you getting surprised, that’s different. Especially for tender ones like us. What are we supposed to do? It’s bad for our hearts, you know. I hope you won’t need pills like I do. I think I get so scared because I’m greedy — I want to hold onto everything, the world wants to take it away. What the fuck. The number of hours we have together is actually not so large. Please linger near the door uncomfortably instead of just leaving. Please forget your scarf in my life and come back later for it.”

— Mikko Harvey, “For M”

• “Willem sleeps on the left side of the bed, and he on the right, and the first night they slept in the same bed, he turned to his right on his side, the way he always did, and Willem pressed up against him, tucking his right arm under his neck and then across his shoulders, and his left arm around his stomach, moving his legs between his legs. He was surprised by this, but once he overcame his initial discomfort, he found he liked it, that it was like being swaddled. One night in June, however, Willem didn’t do it, and he worried he had done something wrong. The next morning–early mornings were the other time they talked about the things that seemed too tender, too difficult, to be said in the daylight–he asked Willem if he was upset with him, and Willem, looking surprised, said no, of course not. “I just wondered,” he began, stammering, “because last night you didn’t–” But he couldn’t finish the sentence; he was too embarrassed. But then he could see Willem’s expression clear, and he rolled into him and wrapped his arms around him. “This?” he asked, and he nodded. “It was just because it was so hot last night, Willem said, and he waited for Willem to laugh at him, but he didn’t. “That’s the only reason, Judy.” Since then, Willem has held him in the same way every night, even through July, when not even the air-conditioning could erase the heaviness from the air, and when they both woke damp with sweat. This, he realizes, is what he wanted from a relationship all along. This is what he meant when he hoped he might someday be touched.”

— Hanya Yanagihara, A Little Life

• “No, I didn’t imagine my being alone with you the way you do. If I want the impossible, I want it in its entirety. Entirely alone, dearest, I wanted us to be entirely alone on this earth, entirely alone under the sky, and to lead my life, my life that is yours, without distraction and with complete concentration, in you.”

— Franz Kafka, from a letter to Felice Bauer

• “If I could attach our blood vessels so we could become each other I would. If I could attach our blood vessels in order to anchor you to the earth, to this present time, I would. If I could open up your body and slip inside your skin and look out your eyes and forever have my lips fused with yours, I would.”

— David Wojnarowicz, The Half-Life

• “I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell, I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world.”

— Madeline Miller, The Song of Achilles

• “If Moses had seen the way my friend’s face blushes when he’s drunk, and his beautiful curls and wonderful hands, he would not have written in his Torah: do not lie with a man”

— Rabbi Yehuda Al-Harizi/Judah Ben Solomon Harizi

• “I’ll rob the bank that gave you the impression that money is more fruitful than words, and I’ll cut holes in the ozone if it means you have one less day of rain. I’ll walk you to the hospital, I’ll wait in a white room that reeks of hand sanitizer and latex for the results from the MRI scan that tries to locate the malady that keeps your mind guessing, and I want to write you a poem every day until my hand breaks and assure you that you’ll find your place, it’s just the world has a funny way of hiding spots fertile enough for bodies like yours to grow roots. I hope our ghosts aren’t eating you alive. If i’m to speak for myself, I’ll tell you that the universe is twice as big as we think it is and you’re the only one that made that idea less devastating.”

— Lucas Regazzi, from “Small”

• “I thought she was sleeping until I heard her call out from across the room, “Will you bring me a glass of water?” I did. Then in her always-sleepy tone and drawl she said, “Do you remember when you were a little girl and you would ask your mama to bring you a glass of water?” Yeah. “You know how half the time you weren’t even thirsty. You just wanted that hand that was attached to that glass that was attached to that person you just wanted to stay there until you fell asleep.” She took the glass of water that I brought her and just sat it down full on the table next to her. Wow, I thought. What am I gonna do with love like this.”

— Dito Montiel, One Night

#this is the best ask i've ever received actually thank you so much #w #compilation #the earth was made for lovers #shauna barbosa #jeanette winterson #madeline miller #franz kafka #hanya yanagihara #emily dickinson #ocean vuong #maggie nelson #chen chen #virginia woolf #vita sackville west #david wojnarowicz #frank o’hara

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gintoki-sakata-archive · 4 years

Text

Amanene Fanfic - Chapter 1 Tickets

Fandom: Jibaku shounen Hanako Kun

Couple: Amane Yugi and Nene Yashiro

Side characters: Tsukasa Yugi,Aoi Akane

A/N: My first AmaNene fanfic, I used an idea from the original manga in a perfect picture arc. Where “Amane” Gave Nene ticket to cinema. Hope you like it

Yashiro was nervous because today, for the first time in a week, she will be able to meet her friend Aoi, who has gone to another city to visit her grandparents, as the summer vacation has come. The girls kept in touch via Twitter and now they can see each other live again. Nene was brushing her hair in front of the mirror and humming a tune under her breath. When she finished, she quickly ran to the desk where she had her phone located, and looked at the display. She put it in the bag, slipped the bag over her shoulder and left. Yashiro was waiting for her friend in front of their favorite childhood cafe. She wrote a text message to her friend "Nene: I'm in. I'm waiting for you" "Aoi Akane: Ok" Nene tucked it into a small red heart-shaped bag, zipped it closed and grasped the handle and tighter, tilted the handle down and opened the door. She was supposed to open wider, but heard a beautiful, calm meoldia. Nene turned her head to the right where she heard the melody. She closed the door and went towards the melody, with time the sound of the melody grew louder. Yashiro turned and found herself in the center of the center. She stopped when she saw the boy sitting on the bench with his eyes closed with a smile on his face playing music. Nene blushed slightly, the wind slightly blew her long hair. Delighted by the boy and his skills. "A-Amane-kun" she stammered out in surprise. She said it in a low voice so the boy didn't hear her. The girl intently stared at the boy who started humming under his breath. It seemed to her that he forgot about the world around him and people passed them on the street looking at the page, some people gave him money in the guitar case. She stared like she was enchanted, her heart was beating like crazy. Yashiro heard her own heart being there. She tried to calm down but couldn't.

XXX

Amane had forgotten the world around him, and he drifted off to a dream world. He thought about it as in a suit as the astronaut by his side Nene with a smile on his lips. Just imagining her smile made Amane's heart speed up faster. He felt the blush appearing on his cheeks. Amane played guitar whenever he was in a bad mood or worried, it helped him relax. His greatest dream was to fly to the moon and he knew that he had a future in it, but music and guitar playing were what could calm him down and take him to the world of his imagination. the brown-haired boy heard the sound as if something had fallen and the sound of yen falling to the ground. Yugi opened his eyes and saw Nene in his case. Amane just looked at her fat calves then his gaze went to Nene's face. You can see that the girl is shocked, her hair was messy, a few locks of hair were covering her eyes, but she had no clear image between the strands of hair. Amane widened his big eyes and his mouth fell slightly downwards in the letter "about". It was evident that the boy was surprised by her presence. Amane shook his head to let out the shock. "Yashiro" He said, coming down from the bench and taking off the guitar and putting it on the ground and leaning against the bench. Yashiro stood up quickly at the sound of his voice and her legs tangled, she staggered and closed her eyes because she was prepared to meet the ground, but she felt her heartbeat and that someone grabbed her waist, and she had her head on his torso, against her heart, and she felt as his heart races as well as her heart Yashiro listened to her heartbeat. She felt comfortable and safe in his arms.

"Watch out" Amane's voice was amused as he said this. He just liked Yashiro and her awkwardness. It made her only more adorable to him. Amane felt Yashiro hugging him more. Yugi felt his friend hugging her head into him, he turned red all over his face, he was burning red, his ears were also red, he felt his heart speed up a thousand times faster. Amane felt his heart pop out of his chest. He stiffened, after a few seconds with a shaking hand, he tangled her hair with the other, he adjusted it and hugged her waist tighter.

They both forgot the world around them. The people of the passing two teenagers just looked at them with a smile. Yashiro's phone rang and it helped Yashiro's mind clear. When she saw what she had done, she hastily moved away from him and lowered her head. She saw her black sandals. She couldn't look at his face. She felt her face turn red and her heart beat two thousand times harder. She tried to calm down, but it was hard to do. Amane felt awkward too and didn't know what to do, so he remained silent. Yugi couldn't stand the silence between them. The atmosphere was tense and the air concentration was as thick as fog. He couldn't take it. "Yashiro-san .. your-" Yashiro stood up, avoiding eye contact with him. She grabbed his wrist and pulled his hand towards her and the other hand, whichever was clenched into a fist. Amane felt something fall on his hand. When Nene let him go, he saw the money - I am the reason the money is torn apart - She said avoiding his eyes Amane tucked the money into his pants pocket. He sighed heavily.

XXX

He really loved every one of Yashiro's behaviors. Amane walked over to the guitar, tucked it away, and rested the case against the edge of the bench and sat down. Nene sat down next to him. They said nothing. Nene kept glancing at him every now and then. She couldn't explain the feeling, but when he was happy she felt happy, it was more fun for her to see his sincere smile. When he was sad she was sad too. She hated the fact that Amane was sad. She wanted to see his smile all the time, his happy smiling face, but when he felt sad she was also sad and could not be happy. Yashiro didn't know why she was reacting to Amane this way, but she knew she wanted to help him. She wants to support him in his happiness and misfortune. She sighed softly under her breath and her gaze stared straight ahead at her sight of people passing by, were shops in front of them. "Yashiro-san" The words stuck in his throat as he saw his love interest looking at him. Amane was always lost in her big amber eyes and smile, but this time he had to focus "I have two movie tickets" He took a breath and exhaled, continued "Would you like to come with me?" Amane was sweating and nervous as his hands were shaking. He was waiting impatiently for an answer. Yashiro analyzed every word he spoke. She really took a moment to consider what he just said. "Whether..." Amane gave a slight shudder as she spoke after a brief silence. "Are you ... asking me on a date?" Yashiro looked at him, her hair blown by the wind, his heart beating faster. "On a date?" He looked away and blushed. "I think so .." He was ashamed to confirm directly because he was not sure what their relationship looked like, but he wants to try. "It ... "Amane grabbed the case " I'll come see you tomorrow at 6:00 PM !! "He said happily in his voice and his face turned more red and Yashiro couldn't stop looking at his glow in his eyes. It was hypontizing his eyes for her. Amane wanted to turn around, but Yashiro also got up and grabbed both of his arms and kissed him on the cheek. The moment was so engrossing for both of them that they didn't hear the phone ringing. Amane's eyes stopped working, frozen, and nothing was reaching him. What happened was like a dream he always dreamed of, that she would kiss him at least once on the cheek. Nene tore her lips from his cheek and when she realized what she had done, her eyes began to prickle, she burned red all over her body and waved her hands in front of his face and began to babble and explain, but even Yashiro's voice could not reach him because he was disbelieving what just happened. "YATTAAAA !!! My OTP had their first kiss and I .. and I, Aoi Akane, captured it on my phone." She managed to capture Yashiro kissing Amane. Aoi's cry of joy successfully woke Amane. He and Yashiro both looked at her. Yashiro turned blatantly bright red "Aoi-Chan ?!" She screamed in surprise Amane happily approached her and took out his phone and asked Aoi to send him a photo to his phone, despite the objections of Aoi's friend, she sent him the photo. "Thanks," said Amane when he received the message, he opened the photo and it was a beautiful memento of the day for him Yugi hummed and walked away from the girls and Yashiro asked her to delete the photo, but Aoi refused to agree "Yashiro-san" Amane turned his head to her. The boy was filled with even greater joy "See you tomorrow!" He waved to both girls and left. That evening, Amane came home, had no dinner, and took no notice of his brother who had destroyed his model of the moon he had been working on for months. In silence, he immediately went to his room. He lay down on the bed. He was holding his phone up and staring at the picture all the time. "It was a good day," He said and put the phone next to him on the pillow and fell asleep with a smile on his face. Tsukasa entered the room but saw his brother asleep, backed up to the door, but took a step forward again. Tsukasa knew that the moon model he worked so hard on would be right. He, even him and what he did, struck him as strange. He climbed onto the bed, grabbed the phone, made a few clicks to unlock the phone and a picture of Nene kissing his brother's cheek came up. In severe shock, Tsukasa wanted to scream, but he stopped Soy, put the phone down and left the room, silently closing the door to his brother's room.

to be continued

#jibaku shounen hanako kun #toilet bound hanako kun #amane yugi #yugi amane #nene yashiro #yashiro nene #amane x nene #hanako x nene #amanene #hananene #myfanfic #amanene fanfic

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baroquebucky · 4 years

Text

tiny marshmallows

a/n: i got this idea from a book i read a long time ago and i remembered this scene last night and i had to write it with bucky! let me know what u guys think <3 requests for marvel characters are open !

masterlist

Bucky was a puzzling person to say the least. No matter how hard you tried, you could never figure out where his head was at. When you thought you knew him and had him all figured out he would do a full 180 and you’d be back at square one. You both talked quite frequently, you would consider the super soldier a friend, but you weren’t sure if he would say the same.

You slipped on your raincoat and headed out the door, upset that the whole compound forgot to buy a box of hot chocolate, despite you definitely texting steve to add it to the list. You ran towards your car, getting your shoes wet and the bottom of your jeans slightly damp as you ran through a puddle.

After a couple of minutes you arrived at the grocery store, heading straight for the box of hot chocolate packets. As you grabbed the box you smiled to yourself and snatched a bag of tiny marshmallows as well. After braving the storm once more and running back to your car, your teeth were chattering and your hair was dripping.

As you arrived back to the compound you decided to hide the box and the marshmallows until the perfect occasion came, but you couldn’t wait that long. So instead you made sure to schedule a movie night in a couple of hours. That would give you time to shower change and make everyone a cup of hot chocolate. You smiled and sent out the message, going to your room to kill some time and change.

As the time for movie night neared you headed down to the main area of the compound to make the hot chocolate, lining up all the mugs and getting them ready. You put the tiny marshmallows in all of them, stopping at Buckys.

Would he like them? I mean yeah he would who doesn’t. Right? He’s so tough and such a hardass, you’d only seen him smile once when sam almosy fell off the roof doing a dare- that is not tiny marshmallow personality. You decided against it and as everyone trickled down from their rooms you handed them a mug, smiling as they all gave you a thank you and hugged you.

Bucky was the last one to come down, he almost walked past you but you noticed the glint of his metal arm as he walked past the lights.

“oh bucky! Here i made everyone hot chocolate” you spoke softly, handing him the mug with puppies on it. He felt his heart swell with adoration as your cheeks grew pink when you realized the mug you had given him.

“I didn’t realize- i mean there were no other ones left, i can go switch it out im sorry” you rambled, attempting to take back the puppy mug.

“no don’t worry i love it” he spoke softly and you smiled, you heart skipping a beat as you soaked in how charming he looked.

“okay” you breathed out softly, walking away biting your bottom lip to keep you from smiling too hard. As you grabbed your own mug, you placed it on the coffee table, going to stand infront of the screen to tell the team what they were about to watch.

“okay we are about to watch the best Disney princess movie, any guesses?” You spoke up, pointing at Sam who looked confident.

“frozen” he smirked and you shook your head, warning a gasp from him. You pointed at Steve who looked at you quizzically “mulan?” you shook your head once again, earning protests from Wanda and Natasha.

“I said movie not princess” you smirked, causing the women to nod and look at you approvingly.

“No more guesses? Cmon guys!” You smiled widely at everyone, excited to subject everyone to your favorite princess movie.

“tangled” you heard bucky whisper. Your whole body lit up and you ran to hug him without thinking twice.

“yes! Tangled! Prepare to watch poetic cinema and fall in love with Flynn rider” you spoke, squealing as you hit play and sat between Steve and Wanda.

“you got marshmallows?” bucky whispered to Sam looking from him own mug to his friends mug. “Yeah you didn’t?” He asked, looking at Buckys mug and noticing the lack of the fluffy sugar bombs.

Bucky frowned slightly, was he not to level for your tiny marshmallows? He shook the thoughts away as he saw you mouthing the words to the scene, smiling when you caught bucky staring at you. Bucky turned bright red and he was very thankful it was dark.

As the lantern scene came on bucky couldn’t help but look at you as you watched in awe. A small smile playing your lips as the couple on the screen sang.

The words rang through Bucky’s ears, his heart beating fast as he realized his feelings for you. While the rest of the team was falling in love with Flynn Rider singing, Bucky fell in love with you softly singing along.

As the movie continued Bucky grew more and more nervous. What the hell was he gonna do? You were one of the few people that Bucky actually was friends with, and now he’s gonna mess it all up because he has feelings for you.

Bucky excused himself from the movie, slipping out with his now empty mug, heading towards his room. He stopped at the kitchen, putting his mug in the sink and closing his eyes for a second to set his mind straight. Did he really like you or was his mind just playing tricks on him?

Since the moment he got to the compound you were sweet to him, always offering to help him, trying to coax him to do more things and live in the moment. You were always there for him, but he was too scared to fully let you in. Yet, there you were always trying to get in, knocking at the door of his heart.

“Bucky? Are you okay? You walked out of the movie” you spoke up, scaring the super soldier slightly as he jumped at the sudden voice in the silence.

“what? oh yeah I’m okay, just tired is all” he gave you a tight smile and you furrowed your brows at him, coming closer the the tall man.

“no you aren’t, i saw you tearing up and then smiling, that’s not what you do when you’re tired” you looked at him, scanning his whole body to check if he was okay physically before finally settling your gaze on his face. You took in the light stubble on his chin and cheeks, the crinkles by his eyes and the now slightly long hair that had grown out since his last haircut.

“i just need to think about some stuff, by myself” he spoke, avoiding your gaze. You felt your heart sink a little. Bucky never skipped your movie nights. Even when he had a mission where he had to leave at 4 a.m. Bucky stayed up until 2:30 a.m. watching Marley & Me and sniffling besides you.

“oh- I’ll leave you then” you spoke softly, turning on your heel and walking back to where everyone else wat he’d the movie intently. Bucky let out a sigh as he searched high and low for the tiny marshmallows, maybe you had run out of them.

As he opened the furthest cabinet and bent over he saw the small bag of the sweet stuff, his heart sinking as he closed it and went to his room.

The weather grew warmer and warmer as time passed and you had yet to make more hot chocolate since the last movie night a week ago. You and bucky had talked since the last encounter, you had brushed it off and gone back to your cheery self towards him, he kept to himself a little more.

It was around 1 in the morning when you realized how badly you wanted some hot chocolate. You quietly and quickly got out of your bed, slipping on some fuzzy socks and going down to the kitchen area, grabbing your marshmallows where you kept them hidden and a pack of instant hot chocolate. As you heated the milk up and watched your show on your phone you heard someone coming down the steps.

You lifted your attention from the screen and paused it, waiting to see who was to join you this late at night. You saw the familiar pair of sweats and smiled internally. Instinctively going to fix your head and checking your reflection to see how you looked.

“why are you up this late?” You questioned the metal armed soldier and he gave you a small smile.

“couldn’t sleep” he responded, looking at the mug you had on the counter and taking note of the milk in the microwave. “making hot chocolate?” You smiled at him and nodded.

“want some?” You asked, already reaching for a mug and another pack of hot chocolate.

“yeah sure why not” he looked at you softly as you grabbed milk out of the fridge, taking out your now warmed milk and pouring it in his mug. You glanced at the tiny marshmallows and thought about putting them in, once again deciding he was too tough for that.

“is it- can i-” Bucky sputtered, his cheeks heating up and he took a deep breath in and exhaled. “can i have some marshmallows? I really love them in hot chocolate” he spoke, pink dusting his cheeks and his ears growing extremely hot.

You blushed and a wide smile spread across your face. “of course! sorry i just never added them because- uh yeah” you cut yourself off, not wanting him to get mad at you.

“why? you can tell me i can keep a secret” he smiled and winked at you as you added a handful and then some of marshmallows to his cup.

“i just- i thought since you’re so intimidating you wouldn’t like something like tiny marshmallows” you mumbled, looking at the floor and trying to avoid his gaze at you.

Buckys heart sank for a second before he felt his chest swell with love for you. He smiled softly at the way you were fiddling with a ring on your finger and how you shifted your weight onto one leg.

“you think I’m intimidating?” Bucky asked, a small smile still playing upon his lips. You looked at him and nodded your head, looking for any sign of sadness or negative emotions.

“I mean it’s not like you’re the easiest person to warm up to, one time i said hi to you and a second later i heard your metal arm whir- i thought you were gonna beat me up” you looked at him, your brows furrowed as he continued to smile at you.

“doll i would never hurt you” he spoke, leaning down to whisper in your ear, “between me and you, you’re my favorite person in the compound” he smiled at you and you blushed, a shy smile covering your face as you looked up and into his blue eyes.

“had i known the best assassin in the world was into tiny marshmallows i would’ve never taken him seriously” you joked, adding more marshmallows to his cup, an attempt to make up for the ones you hadn’t given him before.

As time passed you and bucky grew closer, sharing cups of hot chocolate, full to the brim with tiny marshmallows. The two of you sitting on the roof, your legs swinging off the side of the building while bucky held you tightly, making sure you didn’t fall.

Bucky liked you, so so so much. That’s why he was freezing his ass off on the roof, looking at the stars and the tree line behind the compound with you. That’s why he always made sure there was instant hot chocolate in the compound. That’s why he always made sure that before you walked into the training room he had his muscles flexed.

That’s why he put his mug down and looked at you, taking in a deep breath and trying to stop himself from backing out of this.

“y/n” he began, you turned to face him, smiling at him as he began to talk. “listen I’ve had a crush on you for so long, i didn’t know how deep i was in until that night that we watched tangled. I knew i liked you but it’s so much more than that, i wanna soend all my time with you, i wanna know the little things about you and i want you to know that about me” he paused, searching your face for any sign that he should stop. “I wanna make sure you know that i love tiny marshmallows, and i want to be disgustingly soft with you and-” you leaned in and kissed him, cutting him off.

He pulled back and smiled at you, looking into your eyes, confused but happy. He leaned back in, kissing your lips while his hand rested on the back of your neck. You both smiled into the kiss, laughing when you both pulled away with red faces.

“you were rambling. Figured I’d save you some time and just show you how i felt” you whispered, the two of you still close enough that he could hear you. He nodded and closed his eyes, screwing them shut while he grinned widely.

“does this mean you’ll be my girl?” he asked and you nodded.

“of course you fucking softie” you laughed, biting your bottom lip before throwing your arms around him and burying your face into the crook of his neck.

#bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes imagine #soft!bucky barnes #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes one shot #bucky fluff #bucky fic

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tillmays · 4 years

Text

Is just Her...

the next day

they falled asleep at the fireplace the sun was softly bright. is 7:00 am mac's phone couldn't stop ringing. he woke up saw Riley by his side and smiled then removed her hair from her face, he got distracted looking at her that by the time he grabbed his phone he missed the call, he checked up and had 10 missed calls from matty.

Mac- oh crap .. Riley .. *he shacked her to wake her up, what! ... * she said grumpy* -Riley! *he raised his voice to wake her up, he was in the other room changing his shirt, Mac went back to the fireplace putting his jacket back on* Riley wake up we have to go now!, Matty called. *Riley got up fast and touched her body as if something was missing and she let out a sigh of relief and laughed and sited back* mac just looked at her funny and raised his eyebrows* come on let's go.

on their way to work.

Riley- ahh my head hurts .. we drunk to much. *she touched her face*

Mac- i have a migraine too.

Riley- we need to stop at the gas station.

Mac- we are already late and you want to make a stop?

Riley- trust me, we need a boost. and besides we can't go to work like this. and my head hurts like hell, to be listening matty's screams.

Mac- You are right on that.

they are at the gas station, Riley went to buy something that could help with the hungover and got back in the car.

Riley- here, drink it.

Mac- Riley are you crazy, we already have a hungover and you buy more beer?!

Riley- can you calm down, trust me. this has worked for me before you will feel better. Well at least for a while. *he wasn't sure about it* -you trust me? *he looked at her* then drink it, relax. *he drank the beer and he in a weird way felt quite better.*

Mac- ... i don't understand the logic in this but it worked.

the phoenix somewhere in los angeles.

Matty was ANGRY bozer and desi were already there. the tree of them waiting for them to show up. then finally they walk thru the door.

Bozer- thank god i thought you will have us waiting another 3 hours here.

Mac- matty i'm so so sorry we just ..

Matty- save it I don't want to hear it. i called you more than 3 times you have a responsibility you know how important it is to be on time and if this happens again you will be in trouble.

Mac- and what about riley?

Riley- * she punched him in the arm * dude what the hell ..

Matty- it goes for both of you. i don't have time to play we have work to do.

Matty- today you all were invited to a wedding! *she starts to explain the case* the guy you are going to be tracking is..

Bozer- the groom right? what did he do?

Matty- surprisingly, this time wasn't the groom, its the father of the groom. *photo pops up*

Bozer- ah that's new.

Matty- his name is Oliver Hudson. and he is about business. the man doesn't have a break from his work, a source discovered evidence of uranium thefts at a nuclear treatment plant and informed us that his team it's the responsable. It's his sons wedding, the source told us that he already has someone who want to buy it. And I need to know who. So today he is...

Mac- is going to sell it at his son's wedding.

Matty- yes, and that's when my dream team appears, you stop him from selling it arrest him and bring me the person who's buying the uranium.

Wiltshire, England

they arrived to this 14th century village of Castle Combe, there was a lot of people celebrating for the newlyweds. Riley was wearing this beautiful long formal emerald green dress featuring a-line silhouette, backless design, with low v-neck and her hairstyle was passion/spring twists and was styled with a middle high ponytail.

Desi was looking gorgeous wearing this light yellow dress with a v neck adjust to her waist with a crossed nod as a detail,with a diamond necklace with this loosely hair and only a lock collected with this silver hair pin and mac and bozer in their neat black suits as always.

Mac- has anyone spotted our star yet? he said while walking to the bar.

Riley- not yet. *she had a drink on her hand and passed by his side, mac saw her passing, at first didn't realized it was her, he make a double take and checked her up and down, you could see in his eyes that his jaw was on the floor.

Bozer- Nothing on this side of the room.*changed to the other room and desi was walking down the stairs and walked behind Bozer, she grabbed a glass of wine while she kept walking*

Desi- this is stupid, how are we going to find this man in a freaking castle, who gets married in a castle anyways...

Riley- the little brats just like the bride.

Desi- mmm, but i get it, her man is attractive.

Riley- mhjm... he can get it *Desi laughed*

Bozer- he literally looks just like that actor that was Christian grey in 50 shades of grey..

Riley- i.. didn't know you liked that type of movies.. i thought you liked the real cinema. but youre right if i didn't know him he looks just like that actor.

Bozer- i don't but leanna make me watched those movies with her..

Mac- ok i think you're oversharing boz..

Desi- yes, but we need to be looking for his father not him, so focus.

Mac- everyone pick a floor and move we can't let this man sell the uranium.

Everyone started searching. Bozer and Desi went together to the first floors, were the party was happening, behind the castle, while Mac and Riley went upstairs, while they were searching in an really big open room, Mac reclined to the back of a white sofa and said: - i dont think its here. we have to keep looking. they heard someone was coming to their way, that part of the place was all alone and only them were there.Riley- Mac someone’s coming. *Mac grabbed the glass of champagne he took before to pretend that he was drinking. - Riley come here and grab your drink. *he said almost whispering with an anxious voice, Riley walked towards him, Mac did not think what he was going to do, surprisingly he didn’t think this time he just acted. Mac grabbed her by the arm, opened his legs and placed Riley between them, he pressed her body next to his, He ran his hand across her back, venturing into her skin for that little moment, until he reached her hip a little lower if you know what i mean. they were so close that anyone who had seen them in that scene could see that light, that flame between them, which unfortunately this two did not see, he held her as tightly as if she were going to leave, but at the same time he held her delicately, as if she was made of glass. they didn’t speak for that little unreal moment, they just looked into eachothers eyes like everyone left and was only them. Riley was surprised, and he took her by the arm she though *what the hell is this boy doing* but then her body got loose and she understood what he was doing, she put her arm around him and played with the back of his head, crossing her fingers thru his hair. the both of them felt a they felt a little tickle in the stomach and in the throat but they thought that feeling was for the adrenaline rush of almost getting caught looking for the secret room. the people who they heard coming in was a group of drunk guys they were laughing and tumbling on of them saw them and said - oh we better give them a little privacy.. they went to the next room making more noise. Mac and Riley stayed like that for a minute. when riley snapped out if as if they got hypnotized by each other’s energy.Riley- mac.. *she whispered softly, but he didn’t react* mac.. *she said again* something about the way she said his name that made Mac squirt inside. Mac- Riles.. *with his deep deep voice* Riley- they already left. *she said with disappointment in her voice as she wanted to be in his arms forever. she removed her arm of his neck slowly, mac reacted to that.Mac- oh yeah … they did … * cleared his throat, and as he slowly took his arm from her waist, he didn’t want to set her free.. Riley- oh i will go to the bathroom so i can use the laptop without distractions. Mac- yeah i’m gonna keep on looking on this side.

Riley went to the bathroom to use her laptop in private and she needed to see the blueprints of the castle, she starts to give directions to mac, apparently Oliver make his sells in a back room. then someone is trying to open the door and riley jumped of surprise and closed the laptop and hid it, she opened the door and for her surprise there was the bride who was really really drunk and wanted to use the bathroom.

Riley- oh don't worry, i was just living and smiled.

the bride- oh please i know i don't know you but can you please help me.

Riley- i really have to go

the bride- oh please. *Riley took of her communicator cause she kinda knew were she was going and wanted to give her some privacy*

Riley- ok what do you need?

bride- can you hold my dress while a use the toilet?

Riley- *opened her mouth and in her mind she said -i knew it- she raised her eyebrows and she said: yeah sure why not, is your day anyways.. *she picked up her big dress and the vail who was really long and the bride started talking and talking, Riley in her head was thinking god how much longer is she going to pee?,this is the longest pee i have ever seen.

Riley- heeey girl how many glasses of... whatever you were drinking did you have? cause..

bride- *started laughing* oh just a couple... and giggled.

Riley- great, are you done?

bride- yeah im done.

Riley- *Riley bent down to fix the bride's dress*

back with the team at the castle courtyard.

mac- hey does someone knows where Riley is? i need to know where is that room.

desi- i don't know where is she but i do know where is oliver.

mac- where?

desi- he is sitting at his table with some family and some kids.

bozer- what we do know?

mac- we have to wait, we need to catch him in the act, in the min time desi keep an eye on him, boz go see where is Riley i will keep searching for that room.

back at the restroom

Riley- well your dress is fine.

bride- thank you so so much* she hugged her and gave her a kiss in the chick* you know your my best friend.. i love you.

Riley- thank you, Chloe.

Chloe the bride who was really dizzy and very drunk already forgot those 3 minutes they were in there and said to her- wait how do you know my name?who did you come with?

Riley- oh you're not having more drinks *Riley smiled* i'm marks girlfriend,remember? the best man of your boyfriend i mean husband, and speaking of mens i think your husband is waiting for you should go find him

chloe- you know how beautiful you are, marks very lucky to have you.

*Riley blushed and grabbed the bride hands and turn her around to make her walk to the door* thats very kind of you, but i want to use the bathroom now, she said to make her leave, she knew Mac was waiting for her indications, Chloe walked to the door and she started to stumble and she felt on her back*

Riley- oh not again.

Mac is walking thru the castle following the little indications Riley could give him, he knew he was close so he was in this library and started to look on the room to make this type of device that would work like a magnet but not at the same time to help him find the secret room, looking through the room with the device that he had made with a cocktail glass, a chewing gum wrapper and his swiss knife, he was close to finding it but not that close.

back with Riley.

Riley- ok Chloe come on, you ok? i'm going to take you to your room. she grabbed her by the waist and make it look natural like nothing was going on she didn't want to get anyone's attention, she made it look like Chloe wasn't drunk and walked down the hallway, Riley memorized the blueprints so she knew were to go, one of her many skills. they got to the room and she placed her in the bed, as she was to walk of the room, she heard some steps outside there were three men and she hid and she saw another door and walked into this little room but she knew that it wasn't the one they were looking for, Riley put back her communicator on her ear again, and said: guys how's it going?

Bozer- Riley, girl i have been looking for you.

Mac- Riley where have you been?

Riley- i'm sorry but the bride find me in the bathroom and asked for help she's really drunk, and apparently she thinks we're best friends now. *she kept walking and entered another room*

Mac- glad you made a friend but i need to find that room.

Desi- Mac Oliver is about to leave the table, his bodyguard gave him the phone he just received a call, bozer is with me, we are going behind him.

Bozer- wait,*he said to desi and put his hand in her shoulder to make her stop* look he going to dance with the bride. look Chloe's is there.

Riley- what?! i left her in her bed.. damn that girl is fast.

Mac- Riley can you please look in your laptop and tell me the indication to go find that room.

Riley- well i dont have my laptop with me. tell me where are you.

Mac- what??

Riley- mac tell me where are you i memorized the structure of the castle i know where is the room.

Mac- *makes that face when he is surprised*

ok well i didn't know that you could do that, well i'm at the library, i went to the kitchen, the wine room, and then to this cellar there is by crossing the kitchen and nothing

Riley- that's why you are looking in the wrong places.wait you said that you're at the library? *she walked out the little room and walked to the other room, it was the grooms room.

mac- yes, why?

Riley- there is a door right? not the one you entered of there has to be another.

mac- yes here it is.

riley- there is the room, in there is a big painting.

mac- how is going to be in there.?

Riley- mac move it. but be careful i can't remember but i think it has motion sensors.

mac- you can memorized the blueprints of a castle but can remember if a room has motion sensors??...

Riley- well what can i say.. im Riley.

mac- *he had this cute smiled while she said it* yup the one and only.

Riley- laughed.*while she was in the room she was looking thru the window, while someone walked in, it was the groom. she turned around, and looked him very cold, she was just distracted, but for him she looked like a vision*

the groom- oh sorry i didn't know it was someone in here, excuse me.

Riley- no its ok, its your room anyways.

the groom- how do you know that?

Riley- well there is a bottle of whisky that says for james aka the groom, and you left your vows on that chair.

James- oh that's from my friends *he blushed*

Riley- yeah i notice.

James- and yeah i forgot those.*he laughed* Riley knew she had to make him talk, see if she can get something out of him about his father. but then he asked: so what's your name and what are you hiding in here? im james by the way.

Riley: first of all, i'm not hiding and second of all i already know your name remember* she pointed to the bottle.*he was embarrassed and blushed*

james- well then why are you alone?

Riley- isn't it everyone.. *she said while giving him this penetrating cold stare. James looked at her with more intrigue he was really curious about her. he took of his tie and started to play with it in his hands. he looked like it was having a bad time some said that he looked sad.

Riley with just one look could see the mind of this mans was trying to get over something*- and you what are you hiding. *she said sitting in a couch that was under the window and in front of him but at the side corner of the bed*

James- first of all im not hiding* he said trying to mimic her *Riley smiled*

Riley- oh ok. you look very tense to be the day of your wedding why aren't you with your wife?...

James- mjh i don't know maybe.. because i got an arranged marriage and i don't really love her like that and just married her because of my father.

*yess riley said in her mind, she was going in the right direction*

Riley- i knew it, you have that type of look of my father is an asshole,* he just sighed and laughed* but don't worry my dad is an asshole too.

James- *with his arms on in legs sitting on the bed and was looking to the floor and when she said that, he looked up and looked at her with more interest*- you still haven't told me your name- *he was starstruck by her, he loved how mysterious she was*

Riley- das not important, i wanna know why you think your so miserable.

back with Mac

Mac was hearing the hole conversation between the groom and Riley. He managed to move the painting without activating any alarm, the cameras of the place had already been manipulated by Riley so the image they were looking at security was a frozen image of the empty rooms. he hid and had to wait until Oliver and the man who was going to buy it came in, but he was thinking why was Riley talking with the groom and couldn't stop thinking what was happening there and why was she alone with him in that room.

.........................................................................................................

later will post the whole story, let me know if you would like me to add photos to the story or if you guys prefer to remove them, i like to add them for you, so yall can see what i actually imaginated and make it feel real and close like watching in some way the show...¿ idk ahha and of course this is the following of the las one “i'm here if you need me”. Ik this one had little macriley, but i love to see the jealous angus. (And don't ask me how but that trick of the beer it has really worked for me lol)

#macgyver #macgyver 2016 #angus macgyver #macriley #lucas till #tristinmays #jack dalton #wilt bozer #bozer #matty #desi #desiree nguyen #series #show #fanfic #mine #story

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yespolkadotkitty · 5 years

Text

Rendezvous

So this smutty little one shot is for @fyrecrafted , who asked:

How about reader has been dating Tom and he suddenly gets the need to have a rendezvous in an alley :3

Hope you love it!

“Come on. Let’s dance.”

You looked up from your after-dinner latte to see Tom standing before you, hand out in invitation, his cheeky smile showing just a hint of shyness. Rose-gold street-lights lit the Venetian piazza, casting an air of shadows and romance over the entire area, cloaking it in mystery.

The two of you had spent a dreamy day together, exploring the picturesque Island of Sant Erasmo. The biggest island in the lagoon, Sant Erasmo was famed for its delicious local produce and its wine. After meeting the local farmers and hearing about their lives and crops, you had enjoyed a private vineyard tour and wine tasting. It had been such a leisurely, beautiful day. You had tamped down your annoyance when dinner time came. You'd wanted your day with Tom to last forever.

Helplessly, you suddenly felt your time together slipping through your hands, like sand through an hourglass.

Too fast.

The anxiety of it all had churned in your stomach all through dinner – a delicious seafood risotto with a side of freshly baked herbed breadtsicks.

“Why?”

“Because we can. Everyone else is,” he insisted, a grin tugging at his lips. It occurred to you that you had seldom seen him so carefree. “I love to dance, you know,” he added, almost shyly.

You shifted, trying to fight the battle between your wish to dance and your intense discomfort at doing anything like dancing in public.

Finally the boyish look on Tom’s handsome face won you over and you took his hand. His fingers closed around yours; warm, reassuring. He pulled you towards him, spun you around for a second. Giddy, you leaned into him as the string quartet outside the café started to play a gentle waltz. You breathed in the now-familliar scent of him, bergamot and the tang of coffee and just a kiss of citrus.

“This is absurd.” But you rested your free hand on his shoulder just the same, and let him lead you . Heat radiated off his body through the white linen shirt he wore, and you looked down at your feet. “When was the first time you waltzed?”

“Getting ready for Cranford.”

You looked up into his eyes. They looked almost blue-black in the half-light as he met your gaze. You thought of the second time he’d waltzed on screen, in Crimson Peak. He and Mia had practically set the cinema screen on fire with their antics, in and out of bed.

“I sometimes – and it’s ridiculous – forget that you’re so…. Famous,” you breathed as he swayed you gently, confidently.

“Good.” His gaze dropped to your mouth, and that gorgeous tumble of copper-gold hair fell into his face, a little long, a little messy. The way you liked it. “That’s what I wanted.”

The expression on his face – so naked suddenly, not a trace of artifice – made you bold suddenly. Or perhaps it was the alcohol. But you were in Venice with a man who made your heart sing. You were dancing a waltz in a piazza. Rose-gold light lit everything, and just for now, you would be brave. You would believe in magic, and you would believe in happy endings.

And you wouldn’t think further than this man in your arms. He was solid and real and right now, he was yours.

Tears burned your eyes as your heart constricted. Yes, you would be brave.

And you would pay whatever cost would be levied later.

“Is that all you want?” You tucked his tumbled hair back behind his ear. It felt so soft. An unwruly curl sprang forward.

You’d surprised him. You knew because he held still for a long moment before continuing with the waltz. Someone else might not to have noticed the slip, but you did. In some ways, you had never stopped noticing everything about him, ever since the day you’d met.

“Oh, darling. You know what I want.” His words were so soft, they were nearly carried away by the notes form the nearby violins. But still you caught them. “You.” He swallowed and you watched the movement of his throat, transfixed for a second. “Any way I can get you. Any way you’ll have me.”

His hand on your waist tightened, pulling you a fraction closer. You pressed your face into his neck, knowing you had reached a tipping point.

He wanted to make love to you.

“Tonight?” Your words came out squeakier than you’d hoped. You wondered if he’d laugh.

He didn’t.

“Tonight,” he confirmed.

You’d been seeing each other a while. Your schedule as a costume designer and his as an actor meant weekends meeting in random cities were a given, but this was easily the most romantic place you’d rendezvoused. Tom’s suggestion.

You’d lay together all night, but you’d held back on giving yourself to him fully. What if it didn’t work out. What if you had to dress him one day, knowing he was married to another woman. What if-

You stopped dancing, and he mirrored you . You both held still for a long moment. You closed your eyes, knowing that your decision was about to change everything between you two. Maybe forever.

Breathing in, you opened your eyes again. Tom stood before you still, so solid and real. And yours, for now anyway.

And you would take the now, for as long as it lasted. “Tom.”

“Hmm.” He brushed his lips over yours, gently, a simple kiss without pressure, but a question all the same. He tasted of chocolate.

“Take me back to the hotel. Right now.” Before you could lose your nerve.

* * * * *

The rosy streetlights of Venice winked at you both as Tom navigated the maze of little streets. People gathered here and there, but the late hour meant it was mostly quiet. You could smell the lagoon, the heady scent of wine, the richness of chocolate and cream.

Tom stopped in a quiet alley to get his bearings. Behind him, the moon shone down on you both, bright and silent, hanging like a lightbulb in the black fabric of the night sky.

You slipped your arms around him as he pulled his phone from his pocket, bringing up Google maps. “Hmmmm. I swear it was just the next street along….”

The alley was silent and dark. And really quite nice, as alleys went. Closed shop windows were lined with flower boxes. And Tom smelled of dark chocolate and bergamot, and it was your favourite scent. You felt… brave. Bold. Aroused.

“What if we didn’t wait until we found the hotel? “ you asked.

His gaze shot to yours, his poet’s mouth opening slightly in surprise. “Darling-”

All the pent up desire you’d felt for this man in the months you’d been seeing each other crashed out of you like a dam bursting. You grabbed the lapels of his button-down shirt - Tom in a linen shirt with no tie, and the sleeves rolled to his elbows just about killed you - and pressed your mouth to his.

Dimly, you heard the thud as his phone fell to the street floor, unnoticed. He slid his hands around your waist and pressed you to him, and you thrilled to the evidence of his need for you pressing urgently against your stomach. “Tom,” you murmured, aching already.

“Are you sure?” he bit off against your mouth, and you thought he sounded like a man on the edge of control. “Be sure.”

He pulled back and gazed into your eyes, and you saw something just a tiny bit feral there. It made the pulsing need inside you kick up several notches.

“I’ve never been more sure of anything.”

With a low growl in his throat, Tom scooped you up. You scissored your legs around his waist as he ravaged your mouth, the day’s growth of whiskers on his cheeks scraping at you pleasantly. He moved his attention down to your neck and you arched to improve his access.

Tom moaned your name as you squeezed a hand between your body to cup him through his jeans.

“Want you,” you murmured.

With difficulty, Tom leaned you against the brick wall, keeping you held up with one arm whilst he undid the fly of his jeans with the other. You tugged his shirt tails out of the denim, covering him a little, and then you let yourself play.

He fell into your hand, hot and heavy and large, and you savoured the shuddering breath he let out when you palmed him, stroking until you found a rhythm that made him chant your name like a prayer. He boosted you up higher and you used your free hand to pop open the buttons of your shirt dress so he could lavish attention on your breasts. Your nipples peaked to the slight breeze of the Venetian night. His tongue was warm and wet and his touch there sent a direct spiral down between your legs.

“Now,” you whispered urgently. You kept one arm around his neck, anchoring yourself as he reached down and toyed with you, working your thin cotton panties aside to feel how wet you were. You knew what he’d find and your heart raced as he groaned against your neck.

A hot rush of pleasure filled you as he circled the tight bud at the apex of your body. And the orgasm made you gasp out loud, but you were beyond caring if you were discovered.

Tom brushed a kiss over your mouth before he slid slowly, painfully slowly, inside you. You tilted your hips up just a little, and he pushed in to the hilt.

“Fuck,” he breathed, and the expletive in that cut-glass British accent just destroyed you.

Then he started to move, bottoming out each time he thrust back in, and all coherent thought flew out of your head.

It was over quickly, both of you too aroused to last long. Your muscles convulsed around him and you bit down on the curve where his neck met his shoulder to keep from crying out. Moments later, Tom followed you over the cliff, groaning into your hair.

You wound down slowly together, floating back to Earth. Tom gently set you back on the ground, frowning.

“That’s wasn’t my intention for our first time, darling.”

You grinned, leaning up to kiss him, your body still trembling from the tiny aftershocks of really good sex. “No, but now we can enjoy round two at our leisure in the hotel.”

His delighted laugh echoed into the balmy Venetian night, and you held hands and walked the rest of the way back together.

If you would like something like this written for you, asks are open! Come on in and say hi.

Permanent taglist: @amarisyousei @hopelessromanticspoonie @myoxisbroken @nonsensicalobsessions @arch-venus25 @vodka-and-some-sass

#writing challenge #imagine tom hiddleston #british actor rpf

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glitterslag · 5 years

Text

Paris, Mon Amour - A Booty Call spinoff/Part 3

Back by popular demand. And because Paris Ben needed his own blurb.

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: language, some smut, lil bit of angst and a rogue dick-pic

Summary: You’re trying not to miss Ben, but it’s hard when there are pictures of him everywhere you look. Even your house-mate can’t shut up about him.

A/N: This was originally a spin-off blurb set in the Booty Call AU, but can either be read as a standalone or as a Part 3 of the main fic. LOTS of people have requested this over the weeks (super sorry it’s taken me so long to finally finish) so I’d love it if just as many people RB and comment! Enjoy x

P.S. my tag lists are a holy show at the moment so if you were/weren’t tagged and you did/didn’t want to be - SORRY!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Have you seen those pictures of Ben at the Oscars?”

You were kneeling on the kitchen tiles, up to your elbows in the bottom freezer drawer, hunting for a tub of ice cream. Jen’s voice floated down the hallway from where she stood at her bedroom mirror, taking off the last of her makeup.

Jen was one of those people who always kept her bedroom door open.

“The ones with Joe and Gwil?” You called back, smiling faintly.

You had post notifications on for all of your friends, Joe and Gwilym included. You had, of course, seen their instagram stories from the Oscars.

“No, no. The ones with the girl.” Jen said as she wandered through into the kitchen, towel on her head and her body wrapped in her fluffy purple dressing gown.

“Lucy?” You wondered, spoon in your mouth as you used both hands to rummage for the tub of mint choc chip.

“No, the beautiful blonde, the skinny one.”

“Lucy’s the blonde.”

You were starting to get a bit irritable now, fingers stinging with the cold of the freezer. Where was the bloody ice cream?

“No, not Lucy, another one - gorgeous. A model maybe?”

“I think you mean his stylist.” You said bluntly. “Iliara?”

“Noo no, not his stylist, the stunning blonde-“

“I GET IT SHE’S BEAUTIFUL!” You yelled, slamming the freezer door shut with a heavy thud.

Jen faked hurt.

“Well there’s no need to get so snappy with me. I was just saying.”

You honestly hated her, sometimes.

In truth, you did wonder about what Ben was getting up to every night at these glamorous parties, even though you knew you had absolutely no right to. You couldn’t help it. He wasn’t your boyfriend – far from it - you had only slept together a handful of times by now. And Jen knew that. You tried hard to just to be happy for Ben, and not think too much about him rubbing shoulders with all these beautiful women. But it wasn’t easy when she seemed to have this perfect knack for rubbing things in.

All the boys had said that they wished you could come tonight, but unfortunately not. Apart from Rami, they were only seated in the viewing gallery themselves, and none of them got to bring a plus one. Only having been an apprentice, there was no chance someone with your position would get invited to the ceremony.

You got texts and snapchats from the boys though, all night, making less and less sense as they steadily get drunker and you found yourself staying up way past bedtime to open their messages, despite having a lecture at 9am.

“Wish you were here to help me tie my tie. Keeps coming undone :/” read a particularly sweet one you received from Ben at about one in the morning, and it somehow calmed all of the fears you’d had before.

~~~

“Have you seen those pictures of Ben in Paris?” Came Jen’s disembodied voice almost the second you walked through the door, and you nearly jumped out of your skin.

“What are you, stalking him?” You said bitterly, ripping off your bike helmet and flinging it down onto the sofa.

Jen eyed you from the kitchen counter knowingly.

“Long day, was it?”

You shed your coat, scarf, gloves, hat, shoes, each one coming to join your helmet with more velocity than the last.

“Mm.” You muttered under your breath, stalking over with your arms folded to flick the kettle on. “Remind me again why I started back at this fucking uni..?”

~~~

You had seen the pictures.

Ben had flown to Paris for fashion week that morning, and by the time you sat down to have lunch at uni he was all over your Instagram feed looking like he’d barely slept. There were pictures of him with models. Sat on the front row of some Yves Saint Laurent show sandwiched in between them. The butterflies in your belly had started up again.

You hated yourself for being like this. Insecure was so not attractive. And you were never like that with boys. It’s just that other boys usually weren’t Ben fucking Hardy.

He didn’t look very happy. He hadn’t shaved, and there were dark circles under his eyes. You couldn’t help but feel a twang of concern. You wrestled with yourself for an hour or so before shooting him a little text, enquiring after his wellbeing.

He didn’t get back to you until midnight.

“Just got back to my hotel room. Exhausted.”

“No offence, but you look it.”

Ben had gone straight from the Oscars afterparty to the airport for a twelve hour flight to Paris. You were doing a presentation on colour theory for your Contemporary Cinema seminar when his text had come pinging through into the top corner of your MacBook, hooked up to the projector for your whole class of 30 to see.

Ben Hardy: Still pissed on the plane. Help me

They’d all giggled as you scrambled to switch off iMessage, struggling to regain composure and continue with your presentation, worth 50% of your grade for the whole module. It was a good job Ben had such a common name, as you had to laugh and brush it off when some kid in the back joked that you were “chirpsing the real Peter Beale”.

You recounted the tale to Ben now, hoping to give him a laugh, and indeed, the screen lit up your dark bedroom with a little line of laughter emojis only a minute later. You grinned, warmed. You might have been separated from him by the English channel, but compared to Los Angeles? You could kid yourself he was only next door.

You wanted badly to tell him you missed him, but you’d only just started admitting it to yourself.

“Sorry we keep missing each other.” He wrote, referring to the conflicting schedules you’d had over past few weeks, as well as the time zone issue. “It’s just been a mad one.”

That’s ok! I get it :)

You reply. And then:

You should sleep.

You worked out it would be past 1am there. He had to have been absolutely worn out.

Can’t.

Why’s that?

Kinda got a problem..

You waited for him to elaborate, sitting up and switching on your bedroom light.

You’re not in public are you?

Why??

You were curious now, closing all your other apps to focus solely on the conversation. Surely he knew that at midnight on a Monday you’d be home.

Just answer You at home?

I’m in bed

Even better ;)

You felt a flutter in the pit of your stomach. What was he up to?

Ben, what is it?

I wanna send you something

And then it dawned on you. He couldn’t sleep. Had a problem. Needed you to be alone.

Oh.

Only if that’s ok?? He replied, seconds later.

Yes

You put the phone down on your pillow, chewing on your nails as you waited for him to send it. There was no reason to be nervous. You’d seen his cock in person. Touched it. It just felt like a big deal somehow, having it on your phone. Risky.

He was lying in bed too. White hotel sheets, single bed against one wall, a mirror image of your cramped little student room.

The picture was nice.

I mean, of course it was – it was his, but even for him. He was naked, from the looks of it, lying on his back grasping himself in his fist, bright pink and hard against his belly. He looked gorgeous. You could barely close the picture long enough to tell him so.

You didn’t full-on sext. He was far too tired - and you far too shy - for that. But you did send him a picture of yourself, face cut off from the lips upward, of course. It was nothing too crazy. Just you lying in bed in your low-cut pyjama vest and French knickers (“Fitting ;)”).

After a few more messages back and forth your cheeks were stinging with heat, nipples hard through your pyjama top and a pool forming between your thighs.

He sent you a picture of his come, pearlescent white against his velveteen stomach in the camera flash. You felt your heart beating in your mouth and your fingers and your clitoris as you looked at it, wondering how that, something you’d never, ever imagined yourself wanting to receive from anyone, could be so beautiful to you.

You found yourself longing for his taste. To lick every last drop from the silky skin of his tummy.

Christ. You thought. What had gotten into you?

“What a waste” you typed.

~~~

The next morning you strolled into the kitchen with a spring in your step , and were pouring cereal into a bowl when Jen piped up from the kitchen table.

“Did you see those pictures of Ben?” She asked predictably, and you bit back a smirk. “The ones with the models? He’s at the Yves Saint Laurent show.”

As if you wouldn’t have known where he was.

She was on the gossip page of one of those glossy magazines, OK! or Grazia - that sort of thing. As she brushed toast crumbs away to pour over the celebrity news you caught a glimpsed of a harassed-looking Ben, walking down the street with his hood up.

“He’s at fashion week.” She added.

“Oh, I spoke to him last night, actually.” You said, attempting to sound offhand.

“Really?” Jen replied airily. “What’d you talk about?”

“He was just saying how tired he was. Couldn’t wait to get back to London.”

“He was probably saying it to make you feel better.”

She didn’t look up from the magazine as she bit into her toast. Still, you could tell she was put out.

~~~

Ben arrived back that night and invited himself over. Couldn’t be bothered to deal with the mess at his, he said. He could unpack tomorrow. Besides, Frankie was with his ex for the whole week anyway, so there was nothing for him to be back for. He said he’d dump his suitcase at home and then come straight round, but you didn’t realise how literally he’d meant that.

He looked bone-weary. Hair a mess, he wasn’t shaved or showered, still in his clothes from the flight and you thought privately that you might prefer this version of him the best. His nose and fingers and toes were cold from the outside, and you squealed in his grasp, trying to squirm away but he wouldn’t let you, nuzzling his icy nose into you on purpose, seeking your warmth. You got straight into bed even though it had only just gone 8 by the time he rocked up, and his lips were pressed against yours right away.

For once, there was absolutely no lust there. He didn’t try to roll on top of you, hands staying on your middle, rubbing up and down your sides gently instead of trying to wander downwards. Just kissing for the sake of kissing. It made your heart speed up to think it. You still couldn’t quite believe he was here. He’d never been round to your flat before.

You made out for what could’ve been ten minutes or an hour, before coming to a slow, mutual stop.

“ ‘M’too tired to do anything,” He said, voice thick with sleep as he pushed his face into your neck to smell you. “Jus’ wanna nap for a million years.”

“M’Kay.” You said, muffled against his soft green jumper. He smelled of the outside.

~~~

You woke up not knowing what century it was, and you assumed he’d feel the same.

It was about 7am, and you were positively toasty. The heating had kicked in overnight and you’d fallen asleep in leggings and fluffy bed socks. At some point, Ben had taken his top off and you’d eagerly taken it and put it on, keen for his body warmth that still clung to it.

You peeled yourself off him, feeling sweat sticking down your back from where his bare chest had been pressed against it all night. He was like a space heater at the best of times. You slipped your socks off your sweaty feet and kicked them far down the bed, losing them in the sea of duvet.

You wriggled around in his arms so you could bury into his chest and he wrapped them back around you again, even in sleep. You lay there for a while in the pitch black, playing at being a little mouse snuggled up in the burrow, lying side by side with its den mate in the dark earth. Only the smell and feel and taste of each other to rely on.

You almost didn’t want to wake him up. To prolong the pretence that he was your live-in boyfriend for just a little longer. That he didn’t have to leave in an hour or two and that then you wouldn’t see him again for god knows how long.

You realised you only disliked dark mornings when you were sleeping alone.

~~~

“Have you seen those pictures of Ben at the airport?” Jen asked as the two of you trailed into the kitchen.

Ben stepped out from behind you awkwardly, and her ears turned pink with embarrassment. She slapped her hand over her mouth. You realised this was her first time meeting him in person.

“Coffee?” She managed to squeak after collecting herself again, and everyone laughed.

“It’s a good job you’re back.” She said to Ben not long later, handing him the mug of black coffee which he grabbed gratefully. “She’s been in a mood all week!”

“I have not Jen!” You protested, mortified.

Ben just grinned and slung an arm around you, biting into his toast.

“I’ll keep her in check.”

He winked at you and you nearly died off.

You watched him across the kitchen table over breakfast, thumming at your shirt collar. You brushed your fingers over your sore collar-bone absentmindedly, poking at the skin there testingly, bruised from where he’d sucked and bitten it. There was a sort of soft shyness to the way Ben was looking at you; private, stolen glances over steaming coffee cups, Jen yammering on in the background, oblivious to the fullness of the atmosphere.

You’d never liked it in the morning as much as you did with Ben. Only an hour ago, you’d been giving him a sloppy blowjob under the covers, enjoying the perfect stillness of 7am while he ran his hands through your hair and sighed. Eventually, once he was a bit more awake, he’d hauled you up and then rolled on top, pinning your hands to the bed as he settled his warm, welcome weight on top of you.

You’d not been quite ready for him yet, legs slung over his hips and hooked under his bum as he wiggled into you, and the stretch felt so incredible it had been an effort to keep quiet, conscious of Jen asleep in the next room. His thrusts were slow, fingers laced through yours, holding you down as you kissed sloppily.

Then he’d let go of one of your hands to bring a thumb down in between your legs, fingers gripping at your hip gently as he brushed over your clit, feather-light. He slowly built you to a shivering, long drawn out orgasm, clenching on him violently as he trembled with the effort of staying quiet.

Eyes squeezed shut, pink lips parted, he approached his high, and you took him by the back of the head gently to place a long, soft kiss to his cheek to soothe him. He pushed into it, panting, little noises of appreciation escaping the back of his throat while he came.

~~~

“I’ll have to leave”.

You snapped him out of his reverie and he blinked at you, blushing. You didn’t have to be an expert to tell what he’d been thinking about.

“Lecture?” Ben wondered, and you shook your head.

“Nah, work.”

You told Ben he was free to stay and have breakfast after you left for your part time job at a cafe. However, it appeared that the idea of him and Jen being left alone together terrified him as much as it did you and he opted to walk out with you after you finished your coffee. You walked your bike with him to where he’d parked his car.

“I could give you a lift?”

“Nah,” you said casually, fastening your helmet under your chin. “traffic’ll be bad”

He nodded his head. Neither of you moved to leave, and he looked like he was about to say something until both your heads jerked around at the sound of a group of school kids shouting from across the road.

“Oi, weren’t you in Eastenders?!”

One of them came running across the road to where the two of you were stood, face to face in front of his car boot. The rest of them followed nervously. The two of you sighed and smiled.

“I’ll be late.” You said, mounting your bike. He shot you a pleading, apologetic look but you just grinned at him from over your shoulder. “I’ll have to go.”

You waved him off as the gaggle descended on him, cycling away before they could get too good of a look at you. You glanced back every now and then at his retreating form, trying his best to be polite as they each asked him for an autograph and a picture.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tag list: @thegreekdreamersworld @youcapturedmyheartben @inlovewithbenhardy@summer–infinity @hmmmm-nope @hanginwithmanerds @shhhs3cret @redspecialty @falling-stars-never-cry @deathbyinternets @anita-e-taylor @hales-a-bells @not-your-housekeeper @wanderingxsherlockian @benstolemyhearty @scarsout @hardzzellos @bloominess @wonderless-screwup @abigfatmess @d-r-e-a-m-catchme @borhap-baby @the-claire-bitch-project @lukeofmine @sadfathoe427 @amidst-wonderland @glitterdreamsz @haywood-ya-not @hystericalqueenstan @totallynerdstuff @mustbeaweasleyginger @sweetheartben

#ben hardy #ben hardy imagine #ben hardy fanfic #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy headcanon #my writing #blurb #borhap #borhap imagines #borhap boys

229 notes · View notes

probably-writing-x · 5 years

Text

Further.

~Kind of like the idea of this becoming a series?? Thoughts??~

~~~~~~

"Alright I'll be there in five minutes," You comment hurriedly down the phone to your brother as you step quickly onto the awaiting tube.

"Did you remember everything?" Tom asks as he instantly makes the assumption that your forgetfulness had got the better of you.

"Yes I remembered it all. Your list was, and I quote, get shit for a barbeque and some ice creams," You shake your head, sitting down onto one of the free seats on the vehicle, "And yes I remembered Fab lollies for Haz,"

"Alright alright," Tom laughs, "See you in a minute then,"

You hang up and welcome your music returning into your headphones, settling your head back and blocking out the rest of the public as you await your stop.

~~~

When you get off the tube, the station is in a state of hustle and bustle as the heat begins to overwhelm London once again.

"(Y/n) Holland?" An unknown voice calls and you pull out your earphone to turn around and acknowledge the voice, "Oh my god hi! I'm such a huge fan of Tom and your family!"

"Aw thank you," You smile politely, giving the young girl a hug, "It's lovely to meet you,"

She takes a photo of the two of you and as her phone locks, you notice her lockscreen is full of photos of you and Harrison. It wasn't particularly surprising. Plenty of Tom's fans felt as though the two of you should be together and they already practically treated you like a couple. But still, it sent a little pain through your heart.

Nevertheless, you bid her farewell and dismiss yourself, ascending the escalator before beginning your walk back to the house.

~~~

"That was definitely longer than five minutes," Harry states simply as he opens the door, appearing alongside your other younger brother, Paddy.

"Well then you can go shopping next time you lazy ass," You roll your eyes, handing him one of the shopping bags.

"Public transport makes you cranky," Harry jokes, carrying the bag into the kitchen where the rest of the boys - Tom, Sam and Harrison - all wait.

"Finally!! Harrison's been in a foul mood, like full on hanger," Sam shakes his head, nudging Haz's shoulder.

"Somebody grumpy?" You pout as you reach behind him to put something in the cupboard, "Is it your time of the month?"

Harrison rolls his eyes and leans down so his face is inches from yours, "Must be, I guess we're synced!"

You hit his chest and push him away, busying yourself by starting to unpack the other bags.

"Alright how do we actually make a barbeque?" Tom clasps his hands together, lugging in a big bag of charcoal.

"I've been gone all afternoon and you guys still didn't figure out how to make a fucking barbeque?" You laugh, "I have to do everything in this family!"

"We were busy," Paddy retorts, "Harrison wanting to fill up the pool,"

"That pool we had when we were about five?!" You exclaim, running your hands through your hair to pull it out of your face.

"Well we couldn't find the pump so we had to take turns blowing it up," Sam admits and it makes you laugh even more.

"Something funny?" Harrison raises his brows, tickling your sides as you double over to avoid him.

"Come on! I'm fucking starving!" Harry encourages, all of them oblivious to Harrison's actions being anything more than brotherly.

And before you know it, all of your brothers have left to go into the garden and somehow work out how to make up tthis barbeque.

You and Harrison settle into a silence and it is only then that you can notice the lack of brightness in his eyes.

"Everything okay over there?" You frown, folding your arms as you stand opposite him in the kitchen.

"Um, yeah, yeah," He nods reassuringly, "Can we maybe just find some time to talk later?"

Your face doesn't falter from it's frown, "Yeah, of course. But for now can you somehow help me keep these boys under control?"

He laughs and it seems like he lets his worries slip away temporarily as he follows you outside, hand somehow subconsciously settling on your back as the two of you join the boys in huddling around their project.

~~~

In a while, after the barbeque took far too long to set up, you're all relaxing on the grass as Tom gets up occasionally to check on the cooking.

"Here you go boys," You call, carrying out four beers and a lemonade for Paddy and handing them out to each of them.

You hand Harrison's to him last as you sit down beside him.

"You even got my favourite," He comments, nudging your shoulder, "Thanks love,"

"What can I say?" You joke, "I'm just an all round ten out of ten,"

"You really are," He mumbles but its completely inaudible to you.

And its completely hidden to you how much his eyes focus on you.

~~~

"Ooh call me Gordon Ramsey boys, I am the Antoni Porowski of this group and you cannot tell me otherwise," Tom grins as he starts to plate up burgers and hot dogs for everyone.

They were slightly burnt and some of the burgers were strange shapes from his failed attempts to flip them but nonetheless, they were worth the wait.

"Did you seriously forget to buy ketchup?" Harrison sighs, his hand settling low on your back as he pokes his head over your shoulder to look at all of the food.

"On top of everything else, yes I may have forgotten ketchup," You admit, turning to face him and finding yourself a little too close to him. It provokes a blush to appear on your face and the words to fall away from your lips, no longer being important enough to break this moment.

Harrison swallows the lump in his throat and lets his eyes fall to solely focus on you, dancing across your face like they were terrified to be so close. He envied everything that had ever been closer than this. Every drop of rain, every kiss on the cheek from your brothers, every ex - he envied them all for being closer than it was possible for him to ever be.

"Harry fuck off!" Sam hits his twin over the head as Harry tries to flip the paper plate out of his hands.

It snaps you and Haz away from each other as you reside to your seats on the grass, still gravitating to sit beside each other.

~~~

When the evening begins to draw to a quiet close, your brothers have resided to sitting indoors to watch a match on the TV - leaving only you and Harrison outside after both of you offered to tidy away.

"Are you okay to talk now?" You ask into the quiet air as Harrison stops in his tracks.

"Oh no you don't have to-" He begins nervously but stops as soon as you take his hand.

"Come here," Fingers locking with his, you lead him over to the sofa chair that furnished the patio.

You both sit down and, instinctively, your legs lift up to go over his, one of his hands settling on your thigh whilst the other still plays with your hand.

"So, what's been on your mind?" You ask quietly, looking up to try and focus on his crisp blue eyes as much as possible.

"(Y/n) I don't know how I say this in the right way or how I say it without it seeming like I'm making things worse or I-" He sighs, running a hand through his hair, "But I'm just going to say it because you overthink just as much as I do anyway,"

You can't help but smile a little.

"I think you know how I feel about you,"

"And I think you know the same for me," You mention, watching as he focuses solely on the dance between yours and his hands.

"But I also know that you know where we stand," He admits, "You see, a number of years ago I knocked on the door to your house and it was the first time I'd ever been invited for dinner. And I remember your Mum ordered us pizzas and we played on Tom's old-ass PlayStation. And from that point on, I started treating that household like it was my second family. I confided in your parents like they were my own, I relied on your brothers like we were related and I started to love Tessa just as much as Monty," Harrison chuckles, "And Tom became my best friend. But bit by bit I found myself falling in love with his sister,"

You're silent because the lump in your throat is too prominent to overpower.

"She was this know-it-all that intimidated me and she was so sure of herself and she'd more than likely debate her opinions with me for hours. Sometimes, I'd just pretend to disagree with her just to let her talk," He chuckles deeply, "And I found myself wanting to see her every time I went round. She'd come back from a date with a guy and we'd critique what he'd ordered at the restaurant or which sweets he chose at the cinema. We'd stay up to finish the movie when everyone had gone to bed and we'd eventually watch the next one because we couldn't resist. In all ways she's way way too good for me but I fell for her,"

You finally manage to speaks as he falls into a silence, "And she fell for you,"

"But there are four boys behind that wall that I care very much about and so do you," Harrison gestures towards the house, "And thats the only reason that I can't act upon those feelings,"

"Haz, if we even tried to start anything between us, we both know the repercussions. We know Tom wouldn't handle things well and who knows about the others. If it goes well between us, we could risk losing what we have with the boys," You explain, "And if it doesn't go well between us, we lose us. And we definitely don't want that,"

"I really do like you (Y/n) but we can't do that to your brothers,"

You shake your head quickly, "So, I say we just keep things as they are. I'm sure we can handle that. Over time it will grow to be normal anyway, right?"

Harrison pauses, lifting up one hand and tucking your hair behind your ear, letting his fingers ghost across your jaw and brush past your neck, "Right,"

You're both interrupted by the boys yelling angrily at the game on TV and you take it as opportunity to snap out of the labyrinth that you'd got lost in in Harrison's eyes.

"We should probably head back in," You comment quickly, hopping up and outstretching your hands to him.

He stays silent and follows you back into the house, welcoming the typical sight of all of the boys crowding around the TV screen.

"What took you two so long?" Paddy asks, eyes not once leaving their focus from the blue lit screen.

"We uh-" You turn and glance once more at Haz, "Just had a bit of a debate,"

"Oh god," Tom laughs, "Just like the old days. Did you lose again, buddy?" He turns to glance at his best friend as Harrison takes the empty seat beside him.

"Always," He mutters, eyes watching only you as you take the other empty seat beside Sam, on the complete opposite side to the boy of focus.

~~~~~~

Tags: @imarypayne @sunshine112 @bringmethehorizonandpizza @supernatural-girl97 @vibhati123 @butithasntkilledyouyet @faefictions @carisi-sonny @trap-house-homiecide @spiderrpcrker @tommydaspidey @oneblckcoffee @darlingtholland @fanficparker @xxtomxo @httpfandxms @jackiehollanderr

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oohfluffy · 5 years

Text

DDND Ch.9 | KJI

Group: EXO

Member: Kim Jongin

Theme: Fluff | Dancer!AU | Dormmmate!AU

Word Count: 2,032

❀ Chapter 9: Talking ❀

You grumpily walked home with your hands in your pockets.

"Yah! Jagiya!"

You walked faster, almost running on the street but unfortunately, there's a stop light.

"AISH! WHY NOW?!" You mumbled, stomping on your feet as you look at the bright sky with eyes in slits.

The sun is still up, annoying you in every way. It's only 12:30 pm and you're so hungry.

"You made me run after you, jagi. You're lucky, I love chasing."

And now he caught up to you. You rolled your eyes, still facing the stop light.

"Let's have a lunch date—"

"I'm not having a date with you."

"Lunch then?"

You glanced at him but looked away immediately as you saw Kai was intently staring at you. You cleared your throat.

"I-I'll pick where to eat!" You quickly said, walking fast as the light turns green. You heard Kai say, "YES!" and you can even imagine him pumping a fist on the air.

"It's not a date, it's not a date." You chanted to yourself as you pushed the door to the restaurant you wanted to eat at.

The restaurant looks comfy, not too extravagant and shiny. On top of the cashier area, a wooden plate says, "Enjoy your meals in Winter Heat".

Kai walks behind you, looking at his surroundings.

"Winter Heat? This restaurant is weir— cute." Kai said, stuttering at the end since he saw you glaring at him. You went to the line to the cashier, waiting for your turn.

"Jagi~ I don't know what to order here." Kai whined at you, looking at the menu boards but sneakily wrapped his arm around your waist.

"Just pick what interests you and be done with it." You snapped back, putting your hand on his arm and pulling it away from you. Kai looked at you and pouted. You looked away.

"Aish, fine. I'll order for you."

In the end, you two ate chicken garlic with mayo and butter-dipped potato salad. It was the best lunch for Kai. Not only because of his love for chicken, but because he's with you.

"That was awesome, jagiya~" Kai sang as you both walked away from the restaurant. You smiled, feeling satisfied.

"I know I'm awesome."

"Nah, not you. The chicken is."

You walked faster, trying to leave behind the dancer.

"You just came back and that's how you talk back to me? Unbelievable."

But of course, you can't compete with someone who has longer legs than you.

"You missed me so much. I knew it."

"Whatever."

You stopped trying to leave him behind and just walked how you normally do. Kai suddenly slipped his hand in yours and laced his fingers with you.

"YAH—"

"Shhh." Kai poked your nose as he grinned playfully at you.

"Let me have this moment, jagiya."

You stared at him, hesitating if you should give in or not.

"Even if you don't admit that you missed me," Kai chuckled as you scoffed. "I've missed you, Lin."

You quickly looked on your right side, looking away from him.

Holy marshmallows. I'm blushing, am I? No. No. No. Omg.

"I always think of you, how you glare at me, how you act so stubbornly, how you roll your eyes, how you— ACK!" Kai was cut off as you stomped on his foot.

"Of all the things you should say—"

"Let me finish, okay?" Kai laughed.

You shook your hand, trying to get away from his hold. But Kai wouldn't let go.

"Aish. Come on, babe. Stop trying to get away from me. I'll always follow you."

You felt your knees weak but you've managed to continue walking without tripping.

"W-wait a minute." You stopped walking as you turned to the boy beside you. Kai stopped walking and turned to you too.

"What are you doing, Kai?"

Kai cocked his head like a dog would do.

No. Don't do that to me, you devil.

"Uhm. I'm walking with you—"

"No. Why are you telling me..." You trailed off, trying to find the right words to say. "... weird things?"

"Weird things? Like what?"

You glared at him but he only looked at you, eyes full of innocence. You sighed.

"Are you confessing to me indirectly? Do you even really like me or are you teasing me? 'Cause either way, I don't like it. Please stop confusing me." You snapped at him, freeing yourself from his hold. You looked away, too embarrassed to look back at him.

Croo croo...

Silence...

"Tss." You muttered before walking away from him.

You don't even know why you feel so disappointed. You don't like him, right?

Yes, I don't. Well, if you call waiting for his calls, his comeback and blushing because of his words, not liking him, then okay, you don't.

You like him.

"Wait."

Your feet halted from their movement like you're a controlled robot and your master is Kai.

You heard Kai's hurried steps and felt his breath near your ear. You fought the urge to turn around and just laugh at him, telling him you were just kidding.

"I.."

I think I'm not breathing right now.

"I really—"

You felt your phone vibrate roughly in your pocket. You quickly took it out and answered the call without looking at the caller.

"Yeoboseyo?" You greeted, making Kai's determined shoulders slumped down.

"Lin! I-I was wondering if you have time this afternoon. I know you're a busy person and all but I really want to see this movie but I don't have a companion. It'll be lonely then." Sehun's whiny voice rang though your ears.

"O-oh." You moved away from Kai's personal space and continued walking.

"I'm free this afternoon. What time should we meet?" You answered, trying to shake off the guilt from leaving Kai.

Before Sehun replied, you heard him giggle.

"I'll pick you up at 5:30 then!"

You nodded, making sure you would remember the time.

"What movie are we going to watch then? It'll be your treat, alright?" You asked teasingly.

"Secret. Of course, it'll be my treat! You've been a great companion for me~" Sehun chuckled, making you smile.

"Good boy. I know that already. Tell me something I don't." You laughed slightly, your eyes catching your dorm's gate.

"Then..."

You pushed the gate open.

"I like you."

You halted walking with your mouth hanging open, losing words to say.

Not knowing what to say, you laughed nervously.

"W-well, I like you too, Sehun-ah." You replied, biting your lower lip.

You suddenly heard the front door closed loudly, making you cringe.

"After all, we're buddies." You continued, walking closer to the front door that has been closed.

The line wasn't dead but all you heard was silence.

You almost thought Sehun was mad or something, not that you're assuming. But all your worries vanished when you heard his annoying but adorable laugh.

You automatically smiled.

"Oh goodness! I-I thought you really fell for my prank." Sehun said in the middle of his laugh. "I'm really lucky to have you as a friend. A lot of my girl friends fell for it though and I need to apologize for so many times because of it."

You laughed listening to Sehun's rants about how his girl friends complain about him being such a prankster despite having a poker face all the time.

"I'm glad I'm your friend too, Sehun-ah."

♫ ❧ ♫ ❧ ♫ ❧ ♫ ❧ ♫

You picked your most comfy clothes for this afternoon.

A black sweater with a small white puppy sewn on its left chest area, a black skinny jeans, and to complete your outfit, your favorite black rubber shoes.

And you are so ready to go.

You put lipbalm on your plump lips and powder on your face, lightening up your dull face.

You went to your bed to get your black sling bag when someone knocked on your door.

"Yes, I'm coming down in a minute." You answered, brushing your hair as it smoothly fell down passed your shoulders. You might get a haircut someday when you're free.

After checking yourself for the final time, you opened the door to see Kai leaning on the wall near the door.

"Where are you going with Sehun?"

You walked passed him but he caught your wrist.

Is this one of the cliché scenes where he would stop me from going with other guys?

"Buy me some chicken on your way home."

Or not.

"Fine." You said, not wanting to argue with him for the nth time. You pulled your hand back and quickly went down.

Kai bit his lip, refraining himself to run after you and tell you to just stay at home.

"Aish." He ruffled his hair and went back to his room in defeat.

He just can't say it.

♫ ❧ ♫ ❧ ♫ ❧ ♫ ❧ ♫

"So what movie, Sehun-ah?"

You and Sehun bought food first before tickets. Of course, you told him to.

Popcorn, nachos with extra extra cheese, potato sticks, french fries and drinks. Yum. (Ikr im getting hungry too)

"Wait here. I'll buy the tickets." Sehun said, leaving you at the table near the cinema. You nodded, just staring at the food in front of you, clearly like a hungry person.

"My first love..." You whispered, slightly pinching the nachos.

"I want to eat you already." You mumbled.

"Let's go!" Sehun cheered as he came back with two tickets in his hand. You jumped up from your seat, bringing the food with you as Sehun took the drinks since you don't want to be away from your food.

"What movie are we gonna watch?" You asked again.

"You'll see." Sehun winked, leading you to the cinema.

Your eyes widened, your lips curling up as you look at Sehun.

"I know. I know." Sehun said with a low voice. You giggled.

"I knew I had the best friend ever."

And Boss Baby started playing.

You were almost crying with Sehun as you both went out the cinema, holding your stomach. You went to a café and had your light dinner there. Your table still full of laughs and loud talks that even made other customers look at you two. You'll just both grin at each other and laugh again.

"That was amazing. You're a genius for inviting me to watch this movie with you." You told him as you sat on the passenger's seat in the black Audi you've been dreaming of.

"I knew you'd like it. Well, I really had fun. I knew it was right to invite you because if I was alone, I'd be crazy laughing my lone ass out." Sehun laughed, turning his engine on.

"I'm gonna climb up on our gates again because of you. Like almost every time I spend my day with you, I get locked out of my dorm."

"That's the consequence for spending your time with a handsome guy like me."

You rolled your eyes but the smile on your lips is still there.

"Whatever makes you sleep at night."

You finally got in front of your dorm after an hour.

You got out of the car and before you close it, you said goodbye first to Sehun.

"Thank you for the treat, Sehun. My day was a lot more brighter because of you. I'll treat you next time! I promise." You said, smiling at him. Sehun saluted at you and waved before driving away from your dorm.

You waited until his car vanishes from your sight before slinging your bag on your shoulder and getting ready to climb up.

But the gate suddenly opened.

"You're so late."

You were aghast that Kai was still up and here in front of you, his arms crossed and his frown was obviously shown.

"Really? Didn't know." You mumbled, walking past him.

Kai locked the gate again before running after you.

You were already at the end of the staircase when he got in. He locked the front door and sprinted to you.

You stopped walking up when a hand grabbed your hand. You looked down and saw Kai looking back at you with his sad eyes

Why is he sad?

"Let's talk."

—

❀ Ch.10

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unadulteratedangelheropickle · 4 years

Text

Tags: old/young, legal teen, doctor/patient

°^w^°

It was a typical case. A young girl coming off age, exploring her sexuality after it had been suppressed by dominant parents. She wanted to be a rebell, wanted to provoke with tight-fitting clothes and vulgar language. But subconsciously she wanted nothing more than to be cherished and lead. This raw sexual energy, which he had to admit he hadn’t seen often, needed to be taken care of. So after several sessions dealing her problematic relationship with her old-fashioned parents, he began giving her homework. The look on her face when he ordered her to masturbate before going to bed and in the morning was priceless.

“Lemme guess: You want pictures, don’t cha?”

He chuckled. He couldn’t help it, her sass was amusing and refreshing after a day of listening to frustrated housewifes cry about self-made marriage problems. And, even though he shouldn’t take notice of it, she was a beautiful young thing. Her long red hair, the sparkling green eyes, the adorable freckles on the bow of her nose and between the pushed up mounds of her breasts. In his weaker moments he wondered how far down these pink spots went.

Slowly, the rude redhead grew on him and he liked to challenge her with new sexual challenges. Red loved it (that’s what he called her in his head). She always came back to him all excited, telling him how aroused she had been when she had sat in that dark cinema theater and pushed her fingers into her wet little pussy. In detail she described how her juices coated her fingers and soaked her panties, how her nipples poked through her tight green shirt while she fingered herself faster and faster, trying to muffle her moans by biting down on her lip.

It was quite a picture she drew.

“...And then, when I was really getting into it, I imagined you standing at the end of the row, watching me from the darkness.”

His pen only halted for a second.

“Did you?” he asked politely, pushing his glasses back up his nose.

She nodded, her smirk a challenge.

“And did it affect your arousal?”

“Are you asking if it made me hornier?”

“Yes.”

She leaned back, uncrossing her legs. She was wearing a mini skirt today. And no panties, apparently.

“Yes”, she finally replied, her creamy thighs wagging playfully before she spread them as far as possible.

He lets her see that he notices her absent panties, he takes a long look at that teenage pussy hooded by her short skirt. Then he averts his eyes with desinterest, skribbling some notes onto his pad. In a bored voice he continues the conversation.

“I see you don’t shave the pubic hair on your mon veneris, even though it has become common amongst women your age to shave completely. Why is that?”

Red didn’t bother to cross her legs. On the contrary. She pulled up her skirt and teased her happy trail with a fingertip. The outer lips of her pussy were pink and soft and puffy. Objectively speaking, it was a very pretty pussy.

“I want the guys to look. The bright red attracks attention, wouldn’t you say?”

Oh, how she loved to tease him. The look in her eyes and the crook in her grin told him.

“Indeed it does”, he replied in a neutral tone and took some notes.

“What are you writing all the time?” she asked, obviously disappointed that he didn’t fall for her so easily.

He inhaled deeply. Then he replied in a controlled, neutral voice.

“Patient tries to provoke therapist with not wearing underwear and presenting vagina.”

A flash of anger crossed her face. She hated not being taken seriously. He knew that and he used it against her to show her that he was still in control.

“Give me my damn homework”, she snapped, crossed her arms in front of her perky tits and closed her legs.

He had to suppress a grin. If he was being honest, he loved to tease her, as well.

“Since you’re a fan of going commando”, he started and got up from his chair and walked to his closet, “I want you to drive home with this.”

He showed her the bike saddle he had especially made. It had a bud for clitorial stimulation and a little shaft for vaginal stimulation, not very long though. He gave it to virgin patients, so they had to be short enough to not break the hymen.

Her eyes lit up when she saw the saddle and jumped up from the couch to take a close look. He could smell her peach shampoo while she was standing so close. It was a delicious scent.

“Thank you.”

“Not so fast”, he said and held it out of her reach. “It goes without saying that this is a valuable object and that you take good care of it.”

“Oh, I will!”

“Furthermore”, he lifted his arm when she tried to grab it, “you will keep it out of your parent’s sight. We both know they would freak out if they saw it and then they wouldn’t let you come back to me.”

Her eyes got huge and hopeful for a second. He had spoken gently and for a second the wall of sass and sexual energy crumbled. There was the young woman who needed to feel cherished and loved.

“Would that make you sad?”

“Of course it would”, he replied and finally handed her the saddle. “After all, I make my living with treating patients like you.”

Oh, the hurt in her eyes. But he had to break her. Had to break her walls to get to her soft core.

“You’re a dick”, she hissed and stormed for the door.

Poor girl, he thought, so confused and full of longing. He had to be especially giving with her.

^w^

One week later Red was back on his couch.

“Where is the saddle?”

She crossed her arms.

“I lost it.”

He inwardly sighed. She was in a foul mood. Well, he wouldn’t have it.

“I counted on you to look after the saddle and bring it back to me.”

“Well, you shouldn’t have. You know I am unreliable. I’m just a horny slut who thinks of nothing else but to fuck boys.”

Ah, yes. The words of her father, no doubt. The tears lurking in the corners of her eyes gave it away.

“I have to say I’m very angry and disappointed with you.”

“I don’t give a fuck!”

Her whole body was tense and her breathing was flat, the little buds on her tits poking through her green top. Just from that he could tell she needed release. She needed to cry and scream, to let her pain out.

Her green eyes widened when he came over to her with a few strong steps and she squealed when he pulled her over his legs after he had sat down next to her.

“What do you think you’re doing, asshole?!” she cursed while he locked her down with one arm while the other pushed up her skirt and pulled down her panties. Her round, full ass was a mouth-watering sight. But he didn’t waste any time.

The first slap landed on her left cheek. She screamed, as expected; he hadn’t been gentle.

“You son of a bitch!”

“Apologize.”

“Fuck off!”

He slapped her right cheek now. She screamed again.

“I’ll tell my parents!” she wailed, the tears already falling.

“Do you really think they care what I do with you?”

He began spanking her with regular strokes, hitting her sweet spot low on her ass. He loved the sound and the sight of her pale cheeks turning pink.

At first she fought the pain, a natural reaction, but soon she stopped fighting and just lay there, letting him hit her. He felt the tension move out of her body while she cried and squealed. When she finally relaxed, he stopped, his hand now gently brushing over her hot ass.

“Do you feel better now?” he asked gently.

“No, you f-fucker”, she sobbed.

Ever so gentle did he roll her over. He was prepared when the slap came and stopped her hand, wrapping his arm around her. Holding eye contact he began rocking her.

“It’s okay, sweet girl. I forgive you.”

It were magic words. She began sobbing and slung her arms around him, crying her eyes out.

“It’s okay. I’m here. I will hold you forever. You’re a good girl. Such a good girl you are.”

“I’m-m s-s-sorry”, she sobbed into his shirt.

“I know.”

He held her for a long time, letting her cry. Fifteen minutes ticked away. Then the tears ran out. Carefully he tilted her head back and looked into those beautiful green eyes, now soft and vulnerable.

“I want you to repeat after me: You are an intelligent woman.”

“You are an itelligent woman.”

He chuckled. Even after all that crying she still had that spark of sass in her. He loved it. Gently, he brushed her tears away.

“I’m an intelligent woman”, she said and smiled at him.

“My worth as a person is not defined by my sexual appetite. There is nothing wrong with having as much sex as possible, as long as both are consenting adults. My parents have no control over my life. I have control over my life.”

Red hesitated with the last sentence.

“What is it?”

She looked at him. He was still rocking her.

“I’m afraid. Sometimes I think I’m not ready for being an adult. I wish there was some guide or book...I feel so unprepared.”

“You want to be taken by hand.”

She averted her eyes.

“I know it’s childish.”

“Not at all. I can be that guardian, if you want me to be.”

“But I only see you once a week.”

“I can tell your parents that it’s necessary to see you every day.”

“I don’t think this will work. They told me they want to stop the sessions, since they don’t help...they found me in the garage, fucking our mail man in the car”, she admitted after a second.

“That’s what the fight was about.”

She nodded.

“You fucked him at home to get back at me, didn’t you?”

His fingers brushed up and down her upper arm. She nodded, tears filling her eyes again.

“I was so mad...” she sobbed and he pulled her close again.

“Shhh...it’s okay, sweet girl.”

He began stroking her thigh, her skirt hiked up to her hips and her panties wrapped around her knees. His hand glided down to it. He had to admit, he wanted to push them all the way down and look at this sweet pussy again. He wondered if she was wet now. But it wasn’t the time to ask her. So, with an inward sigh, he pulled it up and her skirt down.

“If you can convince your parents to continue, I will be your guardian. I’ll give you my cell phone number and you can call me whenever you want...and if you want to fuck a guy, you can do that at my place.”

“What?”

She looked at him.

“I have a big house with a second entrance and an en suite bedroom. You can use it. At least then I’ll know your safe and don’t get in trouble.”

With a happy squeal she shot up, sllinging her arms around his neck. Before he could react her wet lips landed on his.

He slapped her thigh. She cried out.

“Not without my permission”, he instructed sternly and pushed her off his legs. When she stood in front of him he pulled her between his legs and pulled her panties carefully over her burning ass. She bit her lip, but didn’t say anything.

Then he guided her to the little sink in the far corner of the room and washed her face. She had her eyes closed and was wearing a serene smile the whole time.

“Convince your parents. Come back tomorrow and we’ll discuss details.”

ooOOOoo

Red came. She had promised her parents to go to church every Sunday from now on in order to make them pay for further sessions. He couldn’t deny he was happy about it. Red had grown on him. He adored the spike in her and he was interested in seeing her grow and free herself from her parents.

The following weeks were fun, Red getting more and more mellow, bringing a guy to her new ‘pussy cave’ - as she called it - almost every night. He heard her moan extra loud, doubtlessly to lure him inside. But he wouldn’t go in until one month later, when she was listening to almost everything he said. Soundlessly he let himself in, the smell of sex lingering in the air of the spacious bedroom with a little bar, a couch and a luxurious bed. It had been the fuckroom all along, his and his girlfriend’s, back when he still had one. He was happy it came to good use again.

He found her on the couch, riding a fella like there was no tomorrow. The back of the couch stood to him, so he could look at her face and her bouncing tits. Casually he leaned against the bar, waiting for her to open her eyes. When she did and they found him, she lost her rhythm and gasped. He smiled encouringly and after a moment she smiled back, falling into another rut. This time she didn’t close her eyes. They were fixed on him until she came; which happened within a minute. He listened and watched her climax. A beautiful, beautiful sight.

This turned into quiet a routine. He found himself watching her almost every time, his cock hard and straining against his pants.

But he remained patient. Red had to come to him. ...She did three weeks later.

He was watching tv when the door to her room opened and she stepped into his home, her eyes curiously glancing around before they settled on him. She was wearing one of his blue shirts and nothing else. She must have found it in the closet. On bare feet she crossed the distance between them until she stood in front of him, blocking the view. Her long full hair cascaded over her shoulders. Her lips quivered and her eyes were begging.

Good, he thought.

His eyes didn’t leave hers when she slowly unbottoned her blouse. Neither did they leave when she brushed the cotton aside, revealing her young tight body. She really was naked and out of the corners of his eyes the red happy trail on her mound was trying to get his attention with its bright color.

When he didn’t react, tears filled her eyes.

She went down on her knees between his spread legs. Her hand reached out for his thighs, but she remembered the rule.

“Please”, she begged and her voice was such a lovely whisper it trembled through his spine straight to his wakening cock.

He gave her a court nod.

She exhaled and smiled, the fear of rejection falling away. Her hands were on his knees, on his thighs, until they rubbed the bulge in his trousers. A little moan escaped her parted lips as she felt his length and girth.

With shaking, impatient hands she opened his belt and pants until his cock sprang free.

Hungrily and with another moan she put her sweet little mouth where it belonged. With his arms sprawled on the back of the couch he watched her suck and lick his big cock. Hungry she was, but also devoted and cherishing. This girl really loved cock and she loved his. She was slurping and sucking soundly, he felt her wet little tongue circle around his head and gliding down his shaft to lick his balls until they were wet.

Needless to say, he loved it. But he didn’t reward her with a moan. Not this time. This was about control, about dominance. So he grit his teeth together and remaind silent, his body completely still...which became more and more difficult because now she was taking him inside her hot little mouth, bobbing her head and sucking him off almost expertly.

The only move he would make was when he came and his hips jerked up, pushing his cock into her lovely throat to feed her with his sperm. Red swallowed it hungrily, sucking the last drop out of his pulsating cock.

When he was done, he looked down at her. She smiled at him shyly, an adorable blush on her cheeks. His only reward was to stroke her left tit once, twice, and pull at her hard pink nipple. Then he sent her away with so much of a hand gesture.

Of course she didn’t understand. She stormed off and slammed the door shut.

He had to always be in control, he reminded himself when his legs wanted to follow her. Also, he admitted silently, he had to keep his distance. She was so fucking sexy. If he didn’t keep her at arms’ length he would be her boytoy within a week. That wasn’t what she needed. She needed a guide, a strong dom to take care of her.

So he continued to play her, make her submit more and more.

Most of the times she came to his house alone now, making herself known with clinks and clanks, waiting for him to come to her. Of course he wouldn’t. Then, after an hour she would come out and join him in the living room, falling on her knees and sucking him off. When she began leaving on her own after she had drunk his load, he knew she understood her role, at least began to.

Finally, he thought.

The next time she came he was already there, waiting in her room behind the front door. She had dropped her things onto the bed when he stepped up behind her. She flinched and gasped, but didn’t turn around.

“Take off your panties”, he ordered darkly, not touching her.

His cock twitched in his pants when she followed his order almost immediately.

“Onto the bed, on all fours, legs spread, upper body on the mattress.”

Fuck, what a sight. Her pink pussy was right in front of him, all he had to do was to pull out his cock and slam it into that tight hole...

Not today, he reminded himself.

He knelt down on one leg, her pussy in front of his face now. He breathed in her musky scent and his cock filled with blood, rising fast.

She gasped when he gave her a friendly slap on her left and then right cheek. Then he grabbed them both and spread her open until he could see both holes. Fuck she was getting wet right in front of his eyes, her pink flesh glistening now.

“Beg me”, he ordered sharply.

“Please, god, please!” she panted, her fingers clawing into the sheets.

“Good girl”, he praised her.

His head dizzy from her intoxicating scent he bent forward and finally, finally tasted her teen juice. His tongue plowed through her lips from her clit all the way over her ass, swallowing the juice he picked up on the way.

She tasted like more.

He lapped at her hungrily, losing control of his own desires for a while. He had dreamt of that cunt. He wanted it bad.

Her legs were shaking and he had to steady her wiggling ass with another slap. Red loved his attention, rewarding and begging with squeals, moans and gasps. He noticed how excited she got when he let the tip of his tongue circle her anus and his cock began aching. A three-hole-girl. Perfect.

He made her cum on his mouth twice before he slammed two fingers into her still pumping pussy, exploring her slick tunnel as far as he could. Her muscles clenched around him. She had trained them well. He couldn’t wait to let them grab his cock, trying to make him stay inside her.

...Not today, he had to remind himself again.

He made her cum on his fingers, enjoying her wails and the sight of her quivering ass.

Taking as much juice as possible on his way, he pulled out his fingers. She watched when he licked it off.

Then he rose to his feet. Her eyes widened in shock when she understood.

“Please”, her little whimper stopped him. “Please don’t leave me.”

He turned around. Tears were in her eyes.

“I need you. Please don’t go.”

After a long look, he strolled back to the bed and looked into her eyes while he opened his pants. With a gasp she crawled to the edge of the bed and had her sweet mouth on his cock right after he had pulled it out. He watched her, saw the bliss on her face when she kissed, licked and sucked on his big cock. She did it so lovingly, admiring his dick with every slow stroke of her tongue.

They had come such a long way. A brat she had been and now...she was woman, loving and giving and begging to be loved back.

A hand glided into her hair and his fingers began massaging her scalp while she pleasured him.

“Take him all the way into your mouth”, he ordered in a soft tone.

His jaw clenched when she did, looking up at him questioningly.

“Good girl”, he praised her and her eyes sparkled with gratitude.

He allowed her to please him as long as she wanted and she took her sweet time. He had to admit he had never been blown like this before, with such devotion. It felt fucking fantastic.

She moaned and swallowed hungrily when he ejaculated into her warm little mouth. After he had finished she smiled up at him and opened her mouth, showing him that she had drunk it all. He chuckled and stroke her cheek.

“Good girl.”

She leaned into his touch. His heart skipped a beat and his finger brushed over her soft skin. Oh, how much he wanted to claim her for himself. But he knew that wasn’t his role. He was her guardian. He had to show her what she needed and then let her find a man who could give it to her.

“Now, let’s have dinner”, he said and put his cock back in his pants. “You need more than sperm to stay healthy. You could use a bit more weight on those narrow hips.”

“Okay.”

No snide comment, no protest. He had done wonders with this girl.

She watched him cook her dinner, sitting on the counter, only wearing her long green sweater that fell over her left, freckled shoulder and her elegant collarbone. He asked about her day and she gave an entertaining report. They laughed and ate together, sitting on the high chairs at the counter.

“Can I kiss you?” she suddenly asked into the comfortable silence that had spread between them.

“Not tonight”, he replied, even though her strawberry lips were things he loved thinking about.

“When?” she asked shyly.

“When you’re ready.”

“Am I not ready?”

“No”, he chuckled.

“But why?”

He didn’t answer her.

“I want you to go out and bring back a guy tonight. I want you to fuck him on the couch.”

“So you can watch me?”

Ah, the sass. There it lifted its destructive head again.

“No”, he replied patiently and lifted her face by her chin. “So you can watch me”, he explained and stroke her bottom lip with his thumb, smiling.

Tears were in the corners of her eyes, but she blinked them away and left.

She was getting attached, he mused. He had to be careful.

Even though she hadn’t been keen, she did as she had been told. Her moans signaled her return and after a few minutes he slipped into the room, just in time to see her naked body lower onto the bloke she had brought. Her eyes found his. A quiver of her lips, a flutter of her eyelids when she took in the cock. It felt like she was sitting down on him. Their eyes never left each other while she rode the stranger, slowly, savouringly, her lips parted, her cheeks flushed, little gasps coming out of that sweet mouth. With his eyes he told her what he would do if it was him she was riding, told her that he would kiss her neck while his hands caressed her skin, covered her tits, massaged them, teased her nipples with his thumbs.

Another gasp fell from her lips and she rolled her hips.

He told her he would kiss and lick and suck her nipples, that he’d push his index finger deep into her ass and gently fuck that little pucker.

“Oh God”, she whispered and began riding the guy beneath her hard, began panting, her eyes burning with desire for him, her therapist, her guardian.

When she came squealing he could feel her pussy clench around his cock. For him, only for him, he thought.

Red broke down then, shaking violently, the bloke wrapping his arms around her. Jealousy shot through him and he knew it was time to leave. So he did.

^w^

On some level he knew they had entered dangerous waters, that they became too attached to one another.

So he made her bring more guys to fuck and tried to stay away. A big mistake. After the third time he found her crying in bed, still naked, the guy gone a minute.

Of course she wouldn’t understand. She was too young. He could kick himself.

When he lay down on the bed behind her, she tried to push him away, insulting him. Normally he would spank her for such words, but this time it had been his fault. So he only shushed her and took her into his arms, pressing her squirming body against his. It felt so good. Even better when she melted against him and cried her poor little heart out.

“I d-d-d-on’t und-d-erstand!”

“I know. I’m sorry. I should have watched. You did good. You’re a good girl. It’s not your fault. Shhh...”

Gently he rocked her naked body until the tears died away.

When she was calm, he began stroking her beautiful young body: Her arms, her shoulders, her neck, her side, her thighs, her full ass...her tits.

She moaned and writhed, her legs parting for him.

God, she was so sexy in her obedience.

Against his better judgement he bent down and sucked her left nipple into his mouth and his hand wandered between her thighs. His index and middle finger rubbed and twisted the little cherry, making it swell and harden. Then he pushed his fingers inside her and spread her sticky juice all over her bald slit, making her pussy smack while he stroke her. Red’s legs were shaking and her hand was fisted in his shirt. Their eyes locked. She looked up at him with big eyes and parted lips, an adorable blush on her cheeks.

They held their gazes while he pleasured her, gave her what she needed so bad: His attention and devotion.

When she came she moaned loudly and her whole body was shaking violently. He held her tight, keeping her safe while she fell.

When it was done, she breathed against his neck and clung to him. So they lay for longer than it was in any way professional. But he couldn’t let her go. Her scent, her warmth...it was too much. He craved her, too.

He was about to roll her onto his stomach and give into the demands of his aching cock when the phone rang all of a sudden.

“I have to answer this, little dove”, he whispered into her hair and after she nodded, he released her and stood up.

An emergency session, court ordered.

He had never been so happy about one of those.

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brainfoodgp · 4 years

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The Seeds for Wellness Journal is written by Brain Food Garden Project’s Founder/Executive Director Sean Brennan

The Seeds for Wellness Journal is edited by Kira Labinger

“Great works are performed not by strength but by perseverance” ~Samuel Johnson~

The world has completely changed as we knew it in just a matter of a few short weeks. The once crowded New York City streets are empty, conveying a post apocalyptic feel, as if they were transported into the Will Smith movie Legend, albeit, before Fifth Avenue became overrun with weeds and shrubbery, and zoo animals escaping, reclaimed an abandoned cityscape as their wilderness. The few people out walking in my neighborhood to go to the market, for example, are wearing surgical face masks. This is all extremely reminiscent of the movies we used to pay good money to see at the cinema to have the shit scared out of us, like Contagion. Now, it’s just an everyday reality that we get to witness free of charge.

Not that I have been doing much walking around lately, because 11 days have now passed since I started demonstrating mild symptoms of the COVID-19 virus. Trust me when I say even “mild” symptoms have been no walk in the park. Soar throat, check. Aching body to the point of feeling like I’ve been hit by a bus, check. Low grade fever, check. Tightness in my chest and mild difficulties breathing, check and check.

Speaking with my doctor and finding out from her just how crazy it is out there right now, made the reality of what I’ve been viewing in our Governors televised daily briefings even more real to me. They still don’t have anywhere near enough tests. So, when she told me to stay put, drink plenty of liquids and to keep her posted if my symptoms got worse, I almost felt relieved. I can’t imagine using up a test that could help someone that might really need it. All I can say is that the guilt would have been more overwhelming for me than the virus; trust me.

And yet, through all of this, signs that a majority of the human race is still overwhelmingly kind, generous, compassionate and hopeful, shines forth all around us. And, while our authoritarian, fascist President and Senate majority and collaborating Governors and some other state officials continue to demonstrate their utter cluelessness and ignorance, others have stood out and stood up for ensuring that every life counts, no matter your political party or socioeconomic status. And have stood up for their belief in science, our researchers, medical professionals and first responders. Americans have even embraced our newest heroes: the men and women that stock our grocery stores and the cashiers who check us out. Millions of people who make minimum wage, and who most people look straight through when going about their day checking off their to-do lists, are now wearing masks and risking their own health every day to continue to go to work for us.

Yes, the world has changed. And, while we have no clear idea how long we will have to continue to self-quarantine, self-isolate, and self-distance, the one thing I know and believe to be true during this pandemic is that the Mental Health Peer Advocacy work force will go down as heroes too. We are on the frontlines of this crisis every day, doing what we have always done: providing resources, listening without judgment and using our own lived experience to assist people in putting their fears and anxieties into context and create their own understanding and path to move forward when this is all over. During this great world tragedy arises our moment to shine, like a bright search light cutting through the darkness and bringing hope. When this is all over, no one will ever again be able to doubt the power of our movement, the importance of peer support and the deep and endless well of empathy we supply to our communities all around the world. What I now know for sure is that no one will ever have the right to question our relevance and our place of importance within the psychiatric medical establishment again.

Below you will find the number for the New York State COVID-19 Helpline.

BFGP Feature:

During Difficult Times Finding A Silver Lining Makes The World Seem Less Dark

Living with manic depression is, at the best of times, like riding on a non-stop roller coaster. And, at its worst, like living through a perpetual highway collision. Yet hundreds of thousands of people like myself, all around the world, do live with it and do find paths to manage their symptoms everyday. As a matter of fact, I have written about many of the tools I use personally in quite a few of these Seeds for Wellness Journals.

Whenever my anxiety spikes, so too does the potential for me to tailspin into a depression. One of the wellness tools I’ve come to rely on is looking for a silver lining in whatever is happening in my life, especially those things my mind perceives to be bad or horrific. Applying my “silver lining” rule curtails the perceived threats before they have the chance to pull me down the rabbit hole.

When I started seeing more and more people wearing masks on the train as I traveled each day to meetings for BFGP or to the Baltic Street Community Resource and Wellness Center, I honestly didn’t think much of it. After all, I had lived with suicidal ideation, many suicide attempts, and two long stays in psychiatric hospitals. It wasn’t until more and more of my scheduled work meetings were cancelled and then the call came for me to close the Center until further notice and send all of the participants home, that I started to think, “Oh, this might actually be serious”. However, even then, I thought the world might be held up for a week, two at the most!

After a week in, I knew that I was about to be living in a much different world. My calendar—my lifeline to keeping my incredibly busy life organized—started to look like a blackened, crossed-out mess. It resembled the few attempts I’ve made at filling out the New York Times crossword puzzle in pen! More meetings were cancelled, then Board meetings, then conferences I was scheduled to speak, workshops I was scheduled to facilitate. I found myself staring at an empty calendar, that used to be filled with my well-planned life, and I began to sweat.

When it sunk in that the pilot volunteer garden program, Connect-Garden-Grow, that Brain Food Garden Project was planning to role out in the spring for mental health peers, was not going to come to fruition this spring, with no end in sight for “social distancing”, that nasty, gnarled footed rabbit with talon-like claws for nails and bloodshot red eyes began to stick its head menacingly out of its hole, beckoning me towards it. And I felt myself inching closer and closer.

And then I stopped, I took a deep breath, and asked myself: “What is the silver lining in all of this for me?”, There has to be one, I thought. While taking a long, hot bath, I found it...TIME!!

If I had a dollar for every time I’ve said: “I am behind on this project” or said to a friend: “Oh, I can’t meet you for drinks because I’m booked that evening for a committee meeting.”, I’d be a very well-off man. Add a dollar for every time I’ve heard a friend or work colleague say those same types of things to me. And I’d be able to retire now, move to Ireland and buy one of those quaint thatched roofed cottages by the ocean that I love looking at on Facebook!

TIME—we are all always complaining about not having enough of it. Maybe it’s to read that book you’ve been dying to read, or to cook a meal for your family, or to paint that masterpiece. And now, we have nothing but time. So, alright, I can’t meet a friend out for a drink right now. But, before I got sick, I had martinis over the phone with a friend I hadn’t seen in months. And we laughed and gossiped and had the best damned time. Another friend of mine and I, in a similar scenario, talked on the phone for over an hour. I hadn’t been able to dedicate that kind of time to our friendship since I took her out for her birthday in February!

As many of you know, because you’ve commented on it. I haven’t written a Seeds for Wellness Journal since Mental Health Awareness Month last May. I’ve also fallen behind on writing the BFGP cookbook, 33 Delicious Recipes for the Brain. Why? Because other work-related priorities got in the way and I had to employ a process of elimination. New things filled the top of the priorities list while others fell to the bottom and stayed there. And now, I’m catching up on that important work that I enjoyed doing just as well.

I’ve decided that I want to make the most out of this time I’ve been given right now. Because when the pandemic is over, and it will be over, I don’t want to look back on this moment, as the racing speedway we call life zooms back at full throttle, and feel like I squandered it. I refuse to feel like I’ve missed a golden opportunity. Call it being more mindful. Call it making the best out of a terrible situation happening to everyone right now. Or call it my silver lining—an opportunity to turn the sickness, isolation and death into something that makes me feel whole and that provides some sort of meaning to this strange time.

What silver lining have you found during the self- distancing and mandated isolation we are all living through with the COVID-19 outbreak?

Baltic Street Community Resource and Wellness Center: Creating A Virtual Eye In This COVID-19 Storm

As many of you know, that follow any of Brain Food Garden Project’s social media platforms, some time ago, I partnered with Baltic Street’s Community Resource and Wellness Center. Baltic Street AEH, inc. was the first of its kind—an agency, created and managed by peers, to serve peers. It was a shining beacon in the sense that mental health survivors were at the helm of steering the ship of their own recovery and destiny. Today, Baltic Street remains the largest, most respected peer-operated program in the country. Brain Food Garden Project aspires to be a peer run and operated program—for peers, by peers— as well. So, when Baltic Street AEH, Inc.’s CEO, Isaac Brown, and the Center’s Director, Sara Goodwin, and Manager, Laurie Vite, wanted to expand the Center’s nutritional programming and to create an indoor garden space, BFGP and I seemed a natural fit. I had already created a garden space for a housing program in Queens, NY. And I facilitate Feeding Our Mental Health workshops for schools and mental health programs and organizations as part of our programming.

I began to work out of the Center three days a week and, after several months, was invited to be the Center’s Senior Peer Resource Specialist. Having already fallen completely in love with the participants and the resources the Center provides for our community, I felt it was not only an honor but a joy to work side-by-side with Laurie to continue to expand my duties. It didn’t hurt that I would work only three days a week which would allow me to continue working with BFGP’s partners to build our first mental health peer rooftop garden, as well as working on other important programs and projects.

It has been an extraordinary experience! And just when we were starting to plant our indoor greenhouse for spring ( as well as having recently added a hydroponic tent) and preparing to celebrate the Center’s 10 year anniversary of serving NYC’s mental health community. The Coronavirus outbreak closed the Center, like many other organizations and businesses, until further notice.

One of the things I love most about the Center is that, at its core and heart and soul, it operates with a Peer Resource Team who work everyday in this incredibly creative space that inspires us to be at our best, “Always in SERVICE to our community.”

At the time of the “shelter in place” order, our Director, Sara had already been out on medical leave for several weeks, recovering from an arm injury. And Laurie, the Center’s Manager, would be returning from a three month family leave taking care of her 93 year old father. Her official first week back would be our second week working from home in quarantine. In several conference call meetings with Laurie, during that first week as she still took care of her father, I kept coming back to this theme in our conversations: “How can the Center still be of service to our community with our doors closed?”

First, I pitched a “warm line” where the Center’s Peer Resource Specialists could be available for anyone that needed to talk. Isolation, for many of us, can be activating. It can bring on depression and create a cycle of reliving past trauma. As I mentioned earlier, I was quarantined in my apartment for less than a week when I started heading toward falling down the rabbit hole, myself. Having been the first team member from the Center to receive my new work phone, I myself, tested out the idea for the warm line that Thursday and Friday. I realized that our Facebook page would need to become even more of a tool for providing our community resources, so I posted my work number on the Facebook page. I was super excited to hear the voices of several of the Center’s participants that first day that I tested out the idea!

Second, the Center thrives on the groups, clubs, workshops and field trips that we offer to our community. I decided to put together and pitch phone-in workshops and groups that would take place 4 days a week in the afternoons lead by our Peer Resource Team. Now, going on week three, we have expanded to two workshops a day, with both morning and afternoon sessions, starting on Monday April 6, 2020. The morning sessions, are from 11am to 12pm and our afternoon sessions continue to run from 3pm to 4pm.

Laurie loved the ideas, and after getting fast approval from Baltic Street’s Director of Operations and with the assistance of Baltic Streets incredible technical support engineer, we held our first teleconference group the Monday of the second week of the quarantine. The Center found a way to continue to be of service to our community— to literally became the “virtual” eye in the storm of the Coronavirus.

To join the Baltic Street Community Resource and Wellness Center’s Facebook page click here if you would like to donate to Baltic Street AEH, Inc. click here

The Feeding Our Mental Health Workshops are held every Tuesday from 3-4pm Call-in information is provided every Monday on the Brain Food Garden Project social media platforms as well as the morning of the scheduled groups on the Baltic Street Community Resource and Wellness Center Facebook page. And to receive a flyer of the full list of weekly group offerings by email: [email protected]

The Baltic Street Community Resource and Wellness Center Warm Line operates five days a week Monday-Friday from 10am-3pm

Warm Line Mon-Fri. From 10am-3pm

Mon. Call Peer Resource Specialist Robert Santiago at extension 917-653-5390

Tue. Call Peer Resource Specialist Christina Correa at extension 917-653-5632

Wed. Call Peer Resource Specialist Paul Wachtel at extension 917-686-9385

Thurs. Call Peer Resource Specialist Sean Brennan at extension 917-982-9747

Fri. Call Peer Resource Specialist Caitlin Haughney at extension 917-653-0408

Notes From the Resistance:

The Coronavirus pandemic has been a reminder to most Americans that our countries little experiment with Authoritarian Fascism has been an utter disaster and failure—destroying countless human lives in its wake. The resistance has been the only thing standing between even more human suffering. And with COVID-19 and the horrifying response of 45 and his collaborators, the resistance continues to be a necessary source to protect the people suffering at this time.

1 in 7 people living in the United States live with not knowing where their next meal is going to come from. Food insecurity is unfortunately a challenge that we have sadly, not been able to overcome. During the pandemic this national crisis will only expand getting worse for millions of Americans. If you have more than you need at this time. You may want to consider donating to God’s Love We Deliver by clicking here. Or another excellent organization doing incredible work is Chef José Andrés World Central Kitchen you can donate by clicking here.

Baltic Street Community Resource and Wellness Center in association with Brain Food Garden Project has created a NYC guide, Resources for Avoiding Food Insecurity During the COVID-19 Crisis. To receive a copy of this resource tool email: [email protected]

It is so very important that during this unprecedented crisis we assist our neighbors, friends , and families to avoid unnecessarily experiencing food insecurity during this crisis. The resistance is the perfect organizational tool to move this vital work forward.

Delicious Recipes For the Brain:

I love this simple crockpot recipe! I make it all winter long. I happened to make a big batch right before I got sick and it restored my soul!! First, you can roast your own chicken for this recipe. However, it isn’t a prerequisite. I make a delicious roast chicken, which recipe I’ve posted in a back issue of the Seeds for Wellness Journal click here. However, this time I bought a pre-cooked roaster from the deli section of my local grocery store. This recipe can also be made completely vegetarian by subbing out organic, sodium free vegetable stock and replacing the chicken by adding a package of Shiitake and a package of Cremini mushrooms to the Button mushrooms.

Ingredients: (Cooking time 8 hours)

(1) Whole Roast Chicken

(1) Package large button mushrooms (or a selection of your favorite mushrooms)

(1) Package of Cellery

(2) Lemmons

(3) Red Bell Peppers

(6) Peeled Whole Garlic Cloves

(2) Packages of Zucchini “noodles” (if you have the proper tool and want to shred your own you will need 3 large whole zucchini’s)

(3) Medium red onions ( if you love the flavor of onions but not their texture you could sub out 3 tablespoons of onion powder)

(2) Large containers of sodium free chicken stock (I prefer organic but that is my preference)

(2) Cups of water

(5) Tablespoons of Cayenne pepper

Crushed sea salt and pepper to taste

Instructions:

(1)Prepare your vegetables by chopping them to your liking.

(2) Pour both cartons of your chicken stock into the crockpot

(3) Add the two cups of water to the stockpot

(4) Crush and add the garlic cloves, salt and pepper, and cayenne pepper to the stock.

(5) Add your chopped vegetables and two packages of zucchini noodles to the stock.

(6) Add the roasted chicken to the center of the crockpot

Place lid on crockpot and set timer for 8 hrs. After the first 4 hours remove chicken carefully and place on a cutting board let the chicken “rest” for 30 minutes allowing your soup stock and vegetables to continue cooking.

Remove the chicken meat and skin from the carcass adding the chicken meat back into the soup. Allow to continue cooking for the remaing pre-set crockpot time.

Squeeze the juice of your two lemons into finished soup, serve and enjoy!

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your-high-lady · 5 years

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Summary: This story is about Feyre. She has a couple of small dreams she wants to achieve but turns out it isn’t as easy as she imagined it would. Trust me, the story is better than the summary. Modern AU. Feysand.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17

Disclaimer: All credits go to Sarah J Mass

Chapter 18: He's back

December 2019

More months passed as Rhys and I did better than ever. Everyone knew we were together and I loved that. Just that day we'd been talking about moving in together. I couldn't think of anything more thrilling than that. Rhys had started opening up to me lately, though he never told me exactly what had caused him to become so closed off, so guarded. I never pushed. It had taken so much from me to tell him about Tamlin.

Tamlin. I had managed to get him out my head. Until this month. Every other day, I'd imagine him around a corner or in a crowd, but when I looked back, he was gone. I felt like I was being followed, watched at, but when I glanced around, no one was there. It was making me paranoid. Frightened. Each time, I told myself I was just picturing him. He couldn't possibly be here, in California. He was in Auckland, far away from me. But then why did I keep seeing him?

Kicking the thoughts out of my head, I didn't let any of that come between Rhys and I. The only thing I could do was be with him and make sure he knew I was always there for him. That he could come to me whenever he wanted and talk to me about anything.

—

We were at the movies that day. It was late, around 8 or 9 in the evening. The nights were colder now and it got dark quickly. I had three layers on underneath my thick coat. Just as we reached the doors of the cinema, he said, "I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Meet you outside." His hand slipped out of mine as he walked back towards the bathroom and I smiled at his back before heading out of the building. Outside the only sources of light were the bright street lamps and the full moon. A sharp breeze was blowing. I could feel it on my face like pins and needles and my nose was going numb. It was tolerable for the first couple minutes, but then I started breathing into my hands and putting them against my cheeks in an attempt to warm them up. Then I heard someone call my name from behind me.

My mind went blank at the voice.

Memories went through my head. Kisses, hugs, smiles, dates. Everything and more.

His name echoed in my head, with words like 'run' and 'danger' also running through my head. It would sort of look like this if the words were physical.

Tamlin danger run run run not safe Tamlin danger run danger not safe not safe not safe run run Tamlin Tamlin Tamlin.

I watched as the words skimmed from left to right, over and over. I knew I was in danger; I knew Tamlin could hurt me any second, that I wasn't safe. But I just couldn't run, no matter how much I wished too. My limbs were frozen, unwilling to move. "Hello, Feyre." He said, smiling wickedly and coming to stand in front of me.

I shivered, not from the cold, and squeezed out the words, "Hello, Tamlin."

"How are you?" He asked as if we were still friends, as if I hadn't left him because he'd let me get raped. But those words brought me out of my trance. I was able to move all of sudden because I was angry. I was angry at him for putting me through all that heartbreak, angry at myself for freezing, angry at the law that hadn't thought it necessary to put this man behind bars. But no more. I refused to be weak, unable to fight for myself. And so before he could realise what was happening, I kneed him in his groin. "Fuming, you fucking asshole!" I said as he fell to his knees, groaning. I kicked him in the stomach, causing him to go farther down. And then I just kept going and going and going. I vented out everything, and it. Felt. Glorious. "I'm angry about what you did to me. I'm pissed!" I said as I kept kicking him here, punching there. "I'm angry at myself for letting you put me in that position. Do you know what he did to me? He fucking raped me. Do you what that is? Sex. He forced it on me. And you let it happen. You fucking let it happen, and I will never ever forgive you for that. I will not let you put me through something like that ever again. I will not be weak again. You'll never have me." I said laughing, half with hysterics and half with adrenaline, and finally stopped my assault on the son of a bitch. I had started attracting an audience, but I just shot them all of them a wide smile, probably looking like a crazy woman who needed a trip to the mental asylum. I didn't care. Tamlin was at my feet. I hadn't let him scare me and I was proud of myself for that.

It was then that I noticed Rhys, walking towards me. He stopped dead about five metres away from me, but he wasn't looking at me. Instead, he was staring at Tamlin who was groaning in pain, blood dripping from various parts of his face where I had punched him many times. Looking back at Rhys, I noticed how pale his face had gone. I'd never seen his face so immobile. It worried me. I kicked Tamlin again, making sure he wasn't getting up anytime soon and walked over to him. Bringing my hand up to his cheek, I said, "Rhys?" His eyes stayed glazed for several seconds, before he finally blinked a couple of times, and brought his eyes to look into mine. I swallowed, once again struck by just how beautiful his violet and silver-flecked eyes were, despite the tears brimming in them. Drops of tears started falling from his eyes and I moved to wipe them away with my thumb. He swallowed, and it looked as if he had to put in a lot of effort to force the words out, but he finally did it. "Tamlin killed them. My family." His shoulders shook with tears and then he was full out sobbing. He fell to his knees and I went with him. I didn't pressurise him into telling me anything else. I knew he would when he was ready. So I did what I could. For several minutes we sat there on the pavement, my arms wrapped around Rhys, rubbing up and down his back, as he cried. He'd held himself so strong and so closed off from the rest of the world, and now it was coming all out. I was so damn curious to know exactly what Tamlin had done, and I knew whatever he'd done was bad, really bad, but I held my tongue. And then several more seconds later, I watched as his sobs finally subsided and he reached into a pocket to get his phone out, and I listened to his side of the conversation. "Hello? Officer Wu? It's Rhys…Yes, it's Tamlin. He's sort lying unconscious in front of us…Um, my girlfriend beat him up?… We're in Palo Alto, at the cinemas… Yes, that one…okay, thank you." He hung up, turning to me. "The police is coming. I'll tell you the rest later." His eyes still had a haunted look but they were definitely more aware now. I nodded giving him a close-lipped smile, and we settled in, waiting for the police to arrive. They arrived in less than ten minutes and soon we were watching as the officers handcuffed a near unconscious Tamlin and lugged him into the car. An Asian officer—I'm assuming the Officer Wu Rhys had been on the phone with—came to talk to us. I gave him a summary of what had happened, which in turn caused him to warn me against assaulting people for no reason, but thankfully he let me off with just that and a knowing glance at Rhys. Soon after that, the police were off, taking Tamlin with them.

We both let out a huff of breath in relief once the car was out of sight before turning back to walk towards our car. Rhys was silent the whole drive back home, but finally, just as I put my hand on the handle to open the car door, he grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me into a kiss. It was frantic and rushed and passionate. He pulled me over the console and I settled in, straddling his hips. His mouth moved down to lick my jaw, to nibble on my earlobe, to suck on my throat. His hand slipped underneath my shirt, and he moved his arm to wrap around my back, pulling me even closer. We were both panting, not wanting to let the other go, but eventually, we broke apart with a gasp and tried to get our breath back. He leaned his forehead against mine and we breathed in each other's scents. We were finally breathing normally when he spoke. "I'm sorry, Feyre." I immediately opened my mouth to object, shaking my head, but he stopped me with a thumb to my lips. "No. I need to apologise. I'm sorry for what he did back there. He must've seen me hanging out with you, and was trying to get back at me by hurting you. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." I stared at him in astonishment, confused by his words.

"What do you mean, get back at you through me? He knows me from high school."

"What! What are you talking about?" He jerked back, looking straight into my eyes.

"I mean that he was in my high school. He was the person…my boyfriend." He stared at me, his face showing only shock. And slowly, I watched as that shock turned into anger. He started cursing loudly at Tamlin's name, and I told him to stop but he wouldn't listen, so I kissed him. That shut him up. "And why would Tamlin want to get back at you? What happened between you two?" I reminded him of my original question. I heard his breath catch, and he looked down. Lifting his chin with my finger, I saw his eyes had started watering again. Blinking the tears away, he said in low voice, his head going back down, "I guess I have to tell you now." It sounded as if he were talking to himself. He sighed and looked up at me. "Come on, let's go inside. I'll tell you there." As we walked up to the front door, I shyly asked him, "Would you stay tonight?" He smiled at me, though the corners of his eyes didn't lift, before nodding. I smiled widely, happy that he was staying despite everything that had happened tonight, and gave him a peck on the cheek, before hurrying up to the door and unlocking it. Mor, I knew, was already sleeping in her bedroom, so we were careful to stay quiet. "Why don't we get ready for bed first, and then I tell you how I know Tamlin the Tool?" He said and I smiled at the nickname before nodding.

Fifteen minutes later, I found myself lying in Rhys's muscled arms, my cheek on his warm chest. He was wearing a plain, worn-out t-shirt and sweatpants, which he had left here the last time he was over. His hand was hooked around my back, and I felt it as he took a deep breath, preparing himself for whatever was to come. Placing my hand over his heart, I could feel it racing. I moved to kiss his neck, wanting to calm him. I settled down again and I knew he was smiling as he kissed my hair, taking in my scent. And then he told me.

"It happened in the winter break, a couple of years ago. There were three of us. Tamlin, Amarantha and—what's wrong?" He said lifting my chin, a small frown on his face. I'd jerked at the name 'Amarantha'.

"Amarantha was one of my teacher's names. Amarantha Smith." I told him, my voice sounding strangely dead. He pressed his lips together in disdain, nostrils flaring. "Let me guess. Red hair, black eyes, slutty nature?" I nodded. "Guess they stuck together." He said, shaking his head in disgust. I sighed, realising Tamlin and Miss Smith had been together the whole time. It just made so much sense. Rhys carried on after a few seconds of silence. "Anyways. Amarantha was my girlfriend." My nose scrunched up involuntarily. Rhys noticed. "Hey, it wasn't my fault. I was stupid and young. I didn't know what I was getting myself into. I thought I loved her. And maybe I did at that point, but obviously, she didn't. All she cared about was the money." That last part was to himself, his voice shaking with anger. He shook his head. "You'll see what I mean, later on in the story." He sighed. "Tamlin was her "brother" and my best friend. Or at least, that's what they led me to believe. And I did. We did everything together, us three." He paused, obviously regretting the time he had spent with the two. "I'd known them for about two years, before that night. They were staying over at my house, nothing new. They'd stayed over plenty of times, and of course, not once at theirs. When I questioned them about it they shut me up with their lies and excuses. Their father was a drunk addict, the house was under renovation, no food. All lies. And I, of course, believed them." I could hear the anger rising in his voice.

I said, "Hey, it wasn't your fault. You didn't know. And they must've been great at lying. It's what they do. They lie and lie and lie, but that doesn't mean it's your fault that you didn't realise. None of this is your fault, you hear me?" He stared at me, and then just carried on, clearly not agreeing with any of what I'd just said. I huffed, frowning, but let him continue. "I'm not gonna stretch it out. Tamlin was sleeping next door and Amarantha beside me. A gunshot woke me up, followed by a scream. I run out of my bedroom, barely processing Amarantha's absence. And then there she was. Amarantha, wearing her silk, purple nightgown," Tears poured down his face but his voice remained steady. "A gun held high in her hand pointed straight at my loving mother. I watched as she fell right down in the threshold of her bedroom with a thud." He was silent for a few seconds, sniffling and gulping as he tried to stop the tears from escaping. "The bitch must've panicked or something because when she saw me and it was clear that she'd shot my mother right in front of my eyes, making me a witness, she shot me too." His hands lifted his shirt and I looked down to find a round scar. The bullet wound. I looked back up as he pulled his shirt back down. "I collapsed from the pain, and soon I was out of it from blood loss. The next time I opened my eyes, I found myself in a hospital. It was two days after that night. Officer Wu, one of the many who were a part of the investigation that happened afterwards, told me what had happened. Tamlin and Amarantha were criminals with long records. He had raped my sister and killed her afterwards, while Amarantha stole all of Mum's jewellery and the money we had saved up from the safe. A neighbour had called the police at the sound of the gunshots but by the time the police got there, both of them were gone. My mum and sister who had meant everything to me were dead and I was following closely behind. But they found me in time. Got me to the hospital. And no matter how hard the police tried, they couldn't find Tamlin and Amarantha. It was like they had disappeared off the face of Earth." He paused, swallowing hard. "Until now."

"My father was often away for his job and when he came home to find his wife and only daughter dead… He died soon after. From grief, I suppose. Mum and he had always been crazy in love and he had been sick for some time at that point, anyways. It only took a month and then he was gone too, leaving me completely alone." He paused again, swallowing as he got his emotions in check. "That winter break, I stayed in that wretched house, just staring at the tv or the stain of blood in my sister's bedroom or the spot where my mother had fallen. I only left the house once in about three weeks to get some groceries. I talked to no one. I isolated myself from the world." He paused. "A week before I was supposed to start college, I heard a knock on the door. I ignored it at first, but when they didn't go away, I opened it. It was Mor. I hadn't seen her in months and then all of sudden there she was, in front of me, hugging me. She brought me out my isolation a little but still, I didn't talk to anyone at college. Mor was still in high school. She wasn't there with me to force me to socialise. Halfway through the year, Cassian came up to me. We became the type of friends who always fought. And then Azriel came. He was constantly alone in college, and one day Cassian and I decided to talk to him. After that, we just clicked. I started thinking them of as brothers, as…family. I was scared though. I had already lost one family. I didn't want to lose another. I talked to Mor about it. She had already met them by then and helped me get rid of the fear. And then Amren came into the picture—she and Mor were friends from high school and before long, we were the Inner Circle, as we like to call ourselves. I had a family again." He looked down at me, tears brimming in his eyes. "I had a family." He repeated, his voice cracking. I just wrapped my arms his neck and kissed him.

I said, "You have a family, and they love you very much. Don't be scared. They love you. They won't ever leave. I swear on my life. They will never ever leave you." I kissed him again, slightly longer this time. Things were getting heated, but then suddenly he pulled away, a nervous look in his eyes. "Feyre, you know how I said the Inner Circle are my family, right?" I nodded, confused. "Well, since you and I love each other, you're a part of that family. You know that, don't you?" I looked at him for a few seconds before nodding, a light smile on my face. He smiled back at me and kissed me, flipping me onto my back.

Deepening the kiss, I wrapped my legs around his hips, pulling him closer to me. His hand on my hip, he groaned, bringing his lips to my neck, my ears, temples. He kissed every part of my face, and I groaned in desperation. I could feel every pore on my face burning as his lips passed over my face. And then he moved on and the fire was replaced with ice-cold air. I needed to feel him, to touch him. I wanted him. My hand drifted underneath his shirt and he groaned, pulling back far enough that I could easily pull the t-shirt of him. Now naked in front of me, I could see his chest rising and falling in great big gasps. Slowly I brought a hand to touch his chest, breathing deeply. He was pure muscle, hard and rippled. I felt one of Rhys's hands squeeze my hips and looked back at him. "I want to see you," He said softly, hesitantly. I nodded. My hands went to the rim of my shirt and he stopped me, getting there first. As he slowly pulled my shirt off me, he whispered in my ear, "I want to be the one to do it. Let me do this, for you, for myself. Let me—" His voice cracked—"let me touch you."

I cupped his cheek and met his gaze. "I love you, Rhys. I will for as long as I live. I want this. I want you." A ravenous hunger had started building in his eyes and I watched as my words set him on fire. He kissed me on the lips, softly whispering, "I love you too, Feyre." And then he unleashed the beast in himself.

We were a tangle of limbs, kisses, groans, moans and sweet, whispered nothings as I marked him down his back, his arms, as he devoured me.

Moaning, our clothes came completely off and he, with heart-breaking gentleness sheathed himself inside me. Once I was accustomed to him, he thrusted with that same gentleness and I came trembling and sobbing as we kissed. He kept moving and I screamed his name, as I came once more, his roar of pleasure mixing with mine.

—

We fell asleep in each others arm, my head nestled in his arm, his other arm wrapped around my waist. I could feel his hot breath on my ear and his soft snoring. I woke in the middle of the night, overheating from his warmth and gently unwrapped his arm from around me. Once I'd found a comfortable spot again, I let myself look at Rhys's resting face. Not a single wrinkle or blemish marked his face. He was mine and I was his. Looking at him in that moment, I knew where ever he was—that would be my home.

AN: Hello. My story's come to an end, did you know? It's the end and I find it so surreal to think of how far Feyre has come since the beginning of her story. I hope her actions in my story have motivated you to keep going, to never stop no matter how hard things can get sometimes. I've always had high expectations from myself and they more often than not take a huge toll on me mentally and physically. But still, I keep going. Because if I don't, there's no point in living. That's the way I think, at least. You may have different views but I think anyone and everyone could use a little push in their life. I hope my story was that little push for you. I hope Feyre motivated you to keep going because to keep going means you'll eventually find that little or big thing you started your journey for and the happiness I'm sure you'll feel at the end...that happiness is worth all the trials and turmoils life will throw at you. It's worth it. Trust me, I know. You just have to keep going to find it.

Also, I do have a little more planned. It's really sweet and I would tell you what it is, but I want to keep it a surprise. It's not necessary to read the rest of the chapters but I think you'll want to if you've already stuck with me so far. I'll upload them all on the same day, as soon as I've edited them. Thank you so much for reading until the end. I appreciate it and you more than you could ever imagine.

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hellcheer-munson · 5 years

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So it’s been a while, huh?

I don’t know how many people are actually still following this blog/are interested in it but...hi again! I already wrote a post sort of explaining where I disappeared to and why (long story short: it was tumblr staff’s fault) but I also want to talk to you guys properly and update you all on what’s been going on since.

I don’t want to abandon this blog but I have another blog that I’m using now -> it’s @alwaysahiccupandastrid. It’s not as Beasts oriented as this one was, I’m afraid, but still feel free to follow it and chat to me! It’s much like this blog was when I used it in that I don’t really post exclusively for one fandom, it’s just a mix of whatever I like!

Anyway, updating! I already told you guys that I graduated university in July, finished my degree...that was stressful! A lot went down at university but it sorted itself out in the end and I survived! Our final assessment was at the end of May, and we performed a show that we created four times, three nights and one matinee. I’m very proud of what we achieved all things considered! But yes...I am no longer a university student!

What else has changed?

I no longer work for the cinema anymore - I quit a few weeks ago after getting a job at a fancy hotel that was supposedly better...I quit the day after my first shift because I had a “me too” experience with another employee...without too much detail, he touched and started kissing me, and I left. I struggled for a couple of weeks trying urgently to get a new job, and I’m now working for Superdrug! My first shift was Wednesday afternoon/evening and I’m excited to start properly! It’s not permanent: I’m also hoping to hear back from Nikon soon about an admin position that’s closer to home and pays extremely well!

I no longer see that therapist who likes Harry Potter - I think I talked a little bit on here about my counsellor who was also a Harry Potter fan and who I liked? Yeah...turns out not so much? I stopped going to her because she a) screamed at me for waiting in the waiting room until my bus was due to arrive down the road and b) she got pissed because I couldn’t do a few certain weeks due to show rehearsals. I’m honestly all the better for it frankly.

More tattoos! - Okay so it’s not a super important thing but it’s a change so...! I think when I was last on his blog I had 3 tattoos - I now have 8! So in addition to the wand, the “worrying means you suffer twice”, and the Deathly Hallows symbol, I now have a tattoo of Leta’s flower from the Lestrange family tree (with her name and the words “beautiful. Separate.”; a tiny tattoo of Harry’s scar/glasses; a Night Fury/Toothless tattoo with the words “heart of a chief” and “soul of a dragon”; the Chief symbol from HTTYD 2; and the words “Night Fury” in Viking runes.

My hair?! - Again, not important but hey! Let’s celebrate! My hair finally grew back and is now blonde! It’s not too long, just about to my shoulders, and my roots are dark blonde whilst the bottom is more bright blonde from dying it in March. It’s silly but hooray!

I met Kevin Guthrie in March! - I met Mr Abernathy himself at Comic Con in London and he was LOVELY. He was such a wonderful man, so cheerful and amazing with the fans. I had some pretty interesting conversations with him about Fantastic Beasts and whether he’ll be in the next one...we shall see! He also told us that Poppy Corby-Tuech (Vinda Rosier) is “all about the cosplay”! And ofc I got some photos with him :)

I’m now 21 - my birthday was obviously in January and I’m old(er) 😂😭 I didn’t do anything too special, just saw CoG with the family and then a few days later went to the WB Studio Tour again (which was amazing because my sister has a friend who works there and was showing us props lots of people won’t ever see!)

Mental Health crap - Obviously I’m not “cured” or anything. I’m still on Sertraline for my depression (haven’t taken the anxiety one for a while but that is a whole other kettle of fish!) and I still have problems but I’m not as low as I have been these past few years on this blog. I’m proud to say that I have been self-harm free since about March or April (it’s hard to remember since the months blur together), and I’m genuinely all the better for it! Part of it is because I didn’t want to damage my tattoos on my arms but it’s also because I’ve managed to resist the urge as well!

^ Having said that, I’m on the waiting list to see a doctor/specialist because my GP said there was a possibility I could have autism/Aspergers/be on the spectrum. It’s a LONG waiting list in the UK so it could be a while until I see a specialist, but there’s that. It’s not a bad thing necessarily since it might be a step closer to making sure I get the exact treatment/help I need.

Fandom junk - I already mentioned in my earlier posts that since late February/early March, I’ve gotten REALLY into How To Train Your Dragon. It’s now my main fandom, in fact, which is sad because the last film has come out and there’s just a half an hour Christmas special left to be released this winter 😭 but HTTYD has had such an impact on my life and my mental state, like it has genuinely made me so much happier and (in my opinion) a better person. I still love Fantastic Beasts and Harry Potter (I even went to King’s Cross at the beginning of the month for Back to Hogwarts Day!) but it’s not my main fandom right now; I had to take a breather from Beasts and the Beasts fandom because it’s really not a great place to be at times. But I’m still into it and I’m waiting for the third film to come out in 2021!

Other random/rather unimportant stuff:

My bed is now overrun with Build a Bear dragons (and the odd baby Niffler)

My sister turned 18 and I’m so...old? I feel so old now omg

I’ve been trying to help the environment by taking little steps like going out litter picking (both on my own and with my dad) whenever I can, and I’ve been using the Ecosia search app as much as possible (for every 45 searches, they’ll plant a new tree!)

I went to Disneyland Paris again in June and it was a lot of fun, I met Peter/Wendy/Alice/Mad Hatter again, there was a false alarm because some twat left their bag at the meet and greet so they had to get the sniffer dog and everything, and I also met Donald Duck, Stitch, Tiana/Naveen AND Rapunzel (Rapunzel is my sister’s absolute favourite, so I’m happy she got to meet her!)

This may be super lame but I got so happy because I got noticed on Twitter several times by Jay Baruchel (the guy who plays Hiccup in How To Train Your Dragon - he’s so awesome and loves the character btw), his fiancée who’s a model keeps liking some of my posts on Instagram, and Cressida Cowell, who wrote the original How To Train Your Dragon books (which are vastly different to the movies but omg they’re so amazing?!), liked a tweet I sent her about my Toothless tattoo and she loved it?! I’m having a good year celebrity/famous people wise for some reason?! 😂❤️

I dont know if my blog was still in use when this happened but I’ll mention it anyway... I SAW EZRA AGAIN IN DECEMBER!! I went to watch Sons of an Illustrious Father play in London and it was GLORIOUS. Ezra Miller is GLORIOUS.

(I won’t post pictures of all the stuff here but... soon maybe?)

So that’s all I can think of...it’s been so long since I used this blog and I felt bad just abandoning it, so here we are.

I don’t know how much I’ll still use this blog, but as I said, I definitely don’t want to just abandon it. At the moment, I’m logged into this account on my iPod and onto my account on my phone, and I think I’ll keep it that way. I don’t know how much posting I’ll do here but I’ll still be around, and I’ll try to see if I can keep this blog alive alongside my current one, if people want me to!

I hope you guys are doing well, and I’m glad to have this blog back. Even if you follow my new blog and have been for the last few months, it’s still awesome to be talking to guys again on this account!

If you guys want to chat or say anything, feel free! Like I said, if people still want me to be active on here then just let me know and I’ll do my best! ☺️

#personal #long post #im on mobile so sorry i couldnt do a read more 😣#fandom

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