#i just really love will r Jeremy

[milolovesbmc]

To the people who make Bmc fanart and draw Will Roland Jeremy, I love you all. You're precious. I hope your pillow is nice and cold tonight. I hope your food has the perfect texture. I hope you have a nice day. I hope everything turns out well for you. You're awesome, keep it up. Everytime you draw Will Roland Jeremy Im giving you a little smooch in the forehead. <3

[leupagus]

Guys I Might Have Three Nickels

I've been watching "Agatha Christie's Marple" for the past few days and it's pretty good! Marple adaptations all tend to have a better caliber of actors than a lot of bog-standard mystery shows (looking at you, "Madame Blanc"), and while Joan Hickson's Marple is right up there with David Suchet's Poirot and Jeremy Brett's Holmes as "literally can never be beaten, these are the best anyone's done it," both Geraldine McEwan and Julia McKenzie do a fantastic job as Miss Marple.

Then I got to "The Secret of Chimneys," Season 5 episode 2

and guys

Guys

So there's a murder of a viscount, like there is, and this detective Finch rolls up and immediately spots Miss Marple (in her NIGHTIE! standing at the window like some kind of hussy, honestly Jane) and doffs his cap to her with that little smile that makes you go, "huh."

At this point I've watched a couple dozen Miss Marple episodes where she goes through detectives like wildfire and this guy's supposed to be a "*guru*" so I'm expecting some battle of the egos or something and like, Stephen Dillane is great! But bleh, I might have to skip this one.

Then my dude asks Miss Marple to SHOW HIM THE BODY, with a pleased little smile at her as she goes "uhhhhhhhh but my knitting?" (He even does that thing where you use someone's honorific and wait for them to give you their name, and that's when I was like "ohhh this bitch knows exactly who she is.") What follows is what I can only describe as a meet-cute in the secret passageway where the viscount was shot (and in fact the body is STILL THERE) and where Miss Marple literally asks the police equivalent of "is there a Mrs Finch" and he looks at her like this:

At which point I'm like "ohhh my dude not only knows who she is, he deliberately came here without a sergeant so he could draft her," and sure enough he just starts...handing her pieces of evidence like "hey babe can you decipher this note for me thanks love you" while Miss Marple is like, "this approval and camaraderie coming from a cop... not sure if want."

Next is a series of romantic strolls through the gardens while they discuss murder, during which Finch reveals his undying love I mean his research into Miss Marple and the "dozen case files" of her previous exploits that he's collected like some deranged fanboy. Miss Marple responds to this by BLUSHING LIKE A SCHOOLGIRL and stammering about how pish tosh it's nothing really, and I couldn't find a gif of it but he's staring at her like this:

Yeah I bet u r tempted

He also makes a half-hearted attempt at negging her "amateur sleuth" status, only to then immediately assure her that he makes like, so much money being a big fancy detective and can keep her in all the yarn and garden seed she could ever desire.

There's also a late-night tryst at the compost pile right after Finch has been (mildly) poisoned and Miss Marple is like "men are so weak" as she roots through the garbage for clues.

Not how he wanted their first date to go D:

The next morning there's another murder which: bummer, but also allows the two of them to read love letters together and for Finch to give Miss Marple the following look as she explains how secret assignations among lovers can "quicken the ardor":

Miss Marple then goes onto solve the murders and btw hands over the priceless diamond that's been literally missing for two literal decades that she found in her spare time. The entire scene features Finch looking at her like this:

After the dust settles, Finch and Miss Marple have a lovely moment where he calls himself "another one of your casualties," then super casually mentions that he's probably going to have to go on assignment to use the diamond in a daring international espionage case and I can't decide if he's asking Miss Marple to go with him or simply trying to show her that he is cool and smart and would make an excellent wife, but either way the episode ends with her turning him down and Jane, we need to talk about your priorities.

Anyway I've already written 2K about the subsequent 10-year epistolary romance these two have following this episode because I make poor choices.

[talesofely]

Happier.

Pairings : Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader, Natasha Romanoff x Steve Rogers

Summary : Your ex-girlfriend, Natasha, seems happier with her new man than she was with you. Or is she? (summaries r my biggest weakness, if it isn't obvious yet)

Warnings : Angst, Fluff (?), a talesofely ending (i'm not sorry 😓), swearing, mentions of romanogers, uses Y/N twice, pls tell me if u see anything else

Word count : 1.1k

Note : not a big fan of romanogers, so this kinda hurts to write 😭

You were walking down a familiar street. You weren't sure if it was the 29th street or the street close to the park. It was a dark and cold night, ones you used to enjoy a lot. You used to love walking around at night, the serenity and calmness it brought was something you cherished a lot. Everything changed due to a certain situation a month ago tho.

Your feet stopped moving when your eyes spotted a newly opened restaurant. It wasn't supposed to be that big of a deal, until you saw a couple walk out. It was Steve Rogers, and Natasha. She was wrapped in Steve's arms as they walked out of the restaurant into the peaceful night road.

You bit your lower lip to calm yourself down. It's only been a month since you two broke up, how could she move on so fast?

You didn't know why you decided to follow them. All you knew was that you were a few feet behind them, watching as Steve said something that made Natasha laugh.

They were headed to a bar. You entered a few minutes after them, immediately spotting them at a small bar table. You subsequently sat on the table on the corner.

It was bittersweet to see them smiling so widely, like they were so inlove. Your eyes subconsciously landed on Natasha. She looks happy. Happier than she was with you.

You smiled sadly. Seeing her like this brought you joy and sadness at the same time. Joy, 'cause seeing her smile always made you happy. Sadness, 'cause you aren't the reason for her smile anymore.

You knew you were also at fault. She hurt you without knowing, and you hurt her for it. Your break up was messy. It was a decision made in the heat of the moment. She dared you to walk away, to leave her alone, and you did.

But you also knew you loved her more than yourself. You treated her like how Carl treated Ellie in the movie Up. Apparently, she doesn't love you as much as you loved her, as she was moving on faster than you could've ever done.

You didn't mind, tho. Especially when you saw how happy she looked with Steve. Who were you to prevent her from having that kind of happiness?

You bit your lower lip and ducked your head, not having the guts to watch the love of your life in another's arms.

You felt a soft tap on your arm after a few minutes. You looked up to see your friends from work, smiling sympathetically at you. They sat at the table you were in, wordlessly buying bottles of alcohol for all of you.

They gave you a bottle of Natasha's favorite beer. Instinctively, you passed it to Natasha that was supposed to be beside you. You froze and sighed deeply when you remembered.

You finished the beer bottle faster than usual. You had high alcohol tolerance, but you didn't drink too much before 'cause you wanted to stay sober for Natasha. You nursed the empty bottle as you stared at your only reason to live being someone else's.

"Stop sulking, Y/N. I know how much you love her, but you shouldn't act like it's the end of your life end just because she left." Scarlett, one of your friends, said with a small smile.

"Yeah, babes, you'll find someone else that'll make you feel the same way—if not more than you did with Natasha." Lizzie gave you a small hug, trying her best to comfort you.

"I appreciate it, guys, really... but I don't think I'll ever find someone who I won't compare to Natasha. She's it for me." You responded with a bittersweet smile, watching as Natasha laughed at another one of Steve's jokes. It made you wonder how funny they really were to make her laugh that much.

"Jeremy, you're friends with Clint, right?" The said man nodded, looking at you in confusion.

"Don't mention my name, but please ask him to tell Natasha, that if he breaks her heart... I'll always be here, waiting patiently for her. No matter what." You sighed deeply seeing the couple stand up, and got ready to leave. You drank the last of your drink before ordering another bottle.

_______________

"Hey, Nat, have you heard?" Clint asked as he entered the kitchen where Natasha was coincidentally in.

"Heard about what?"

"Y/N finally released a single. Tony's going to play it tonight."

Natasha's brows furrowed in confusion, searching her best friend's face for any signs of playfulness but found nothing.

"What's it called?"

"Happier."

Natasha bit her lower lip, as she nodded, trying to act like she didn't care about it. Based on the title, she figured it was about being happier without her.

_______________

The avengers settled down in the common room, all ready to hear your first single.

"Ready?" Tony played the recording despite Sam's small "Wait." as he ran to the kitchen to grab a snack.

When your voice came through the speaker as you sang the first line, Natasha felt her heart clench. Oh how she missed your voice, your lullabies when she nightmares hinder her from sleep, and your soft singing as you danced with her around the kitchen in the refrigerator light at 3am.

As the song continued, Natasha realized the lyrics were about her. About your previous relationship. About... missing her.

Not only that, but the information on the lyrics were almost the same as the night she went out with Steve. 29th and Park, a month, a bar, corner of the room, empty bottle... Shit. You saw her.

Her panicking eyes met Steve's equally surprised ones. She immediately took her phone out, despite the song not even ending yet. She cursed when she was brought straight to voice mail. This doesn't stop her from calling you multiple times again though.

Clint looked at Natasha in realization, only then remembering and realizing what Jeremy's cryptic message was about.

So you were the 'she' he was talking about.

The archer approached his best friend, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Nat." He called her attention, only to be answered by a hum and glossy eyes from her.

"Jeremy, one of Y/N's friend, talked to me yesterday. He told me to tell you that, 'She'll always be there, waiting patiently for you. No matter what.'" He said quietly, trying to not attract unwanted attention to the now silently crying spy, knowing how much she hates others seeing her vulnerable side.

If only you picked up her calls, if only you read her texts, if only she knew your address, if only she knew you were there that day... she would've approached you and told you that it wasn't real. It was a mission. A mere undercover mission.

If only you knew that her heart still is, and will always be, yours.

If only you knew that she will only truly be happy with you.

Note : i'm sorry...? part 2 or naaahh? i kinda like this ending:> btw, i used this to cure my writer's block so BAHHAHAHAHA enjoyyy! mwaAaAaAaA:3

[luveline]

Hi Jade! First of all thank you for bringing back the zombie au, it is my absolute fave! Second, if you are taking requests for it currently, maybe r (with Robin maybe?) goes and finds a gift for Steve just to make him smile (which may or may not make him break into tears with how vulnerable and emotional he's been with all the stuff he's been through?) Thank you for all your lovely writing!

thank you anon! fem!reader, 8k —You, Steve and Robin make a risky trip for non-essentials to improve your quality of life at the camp. Steve's feeling stressed, you try to make it better, and Robin finds a cat in the display section of the mattress store. 

tw for zombie apocalypse typical implied violence and gore, food insecurity, injury

"We'll call it something really cool," Robin says, "like Y/N and Robin's ultimate quest for cleanliness." 

Robin is a little dirty today. She's scraped her hair back into a tiny ponytail, and it flicks out at the back of her head like a feather duster. You think it's adorable, and you lean around her shoulders to try and touch it. Steve pulls you back bodily. 

"Stop touching her," he says. 

"Just her hair," you say. 

"No, because you know how ansty she is, it's like poking a sleeping dragon." 

"Shut up! Shut up, loser, I haven't been antsy at all, I'm planning a girl's trip as we speak." 

You laugh and fall back into Steve's arms, the kind of laugh that makes your chest feel tight and your eyes scrunch closed. A girl's trip is definitely one way to put it. 

"I'm just saying," Steve says, not just saying at all, "that you're dangerous right now. Next time I'll let her touch your hair and you can bite her hand off." 

"She can touch my hair. I don't know if you've noticed, Harrington, but that right there is my very best friend."

And okay, it's not true, Steve and Robin have the strongest friendship you've ever seen, but there is a truth behind it —you and Robin get along well. It would be difficult not to love her, she's a gem, and she cares about the person you care about most in the world at the same level (though in a different calibre). 

You worm out of Steve's arms to give her a quick hug. Steve steals you away again and you laugh as you go, flopping your weight onto him and almost knocking him flat onto his back. 

You, Robin and Steve are sitting around the campfire in the centre of camp. It's rather big and blissfully hot, the sky a velvet black that hides the smoke. Children sit with droopy eyes to the left, some with parents and most without, though the community is full of good people with great hearts who've swooped in to help look after them. Already, an older woman named Matildhe seems to have gathered a brood of six children, all young, and all wanting cuddles. To the right, Jeremy Livingstone and Joyce Byers plan the unplannable, a map of Michigan at their feet held down by stones. Jonathan sits by his mother's legs with a baby in his lap, her sleeping face pressed to his chest. He taps her back absent-mindedly. "What about here?" he asks, drawing a circle with his finger. Will, his younger brother, moves the flashlight beam to follow his direction. 

Despite the fire, the wind bites at your backs, a nippy chill. Steve has solved this by becoming your windbreaker, or so he claims. 

"She loves me," you murmur. 

"I love her," Robin agrees. 

"That's why you can't come on our girl's trip," you say. 

"Girls," Steve says, measured, "I'm unsure, but I'm starting to think that you think you're going somewhere without me." 

"No, we know you'll crash the party. But we're going to pretend you aren't there," Robin says. 

Her chipper attitude makes you laugh for the millionth time tonight. Steve laughs in tandem behind you, his breath fanning warmly over the shell of your ear. 

It smells like woodsmoke and pine needles meshed together here, two smells that alone are nice but together give you a headache. You wrinkle your nose and sit up properly, worried about squashing Steve or hurting his bad knee. "The smell is so strong out here," you say. 

"Shit, this guy bothering you?" Steve asks, pointing his thumb at the fire. 

"Kick his ass, Steve," Robin says. 

"Are you losers drunk?" Dustin asks. 

You twist on your butt to face him, Steve's favourite sixteen year old standing in the dark wearing two coats and three scarfs. 

"Are you cold?" Steve asks. "Come and sit with us." 

"We aren't drunk, just happy," you say, gesturing for him to do as Steve said. 

Dustin sits by the fire with you, groaning. "What is there to be happy about?" 

You bite your top lip. Dustin is so young, and he's lost a lot. More than he ever should've had to lose, twice, his sense of normalcy destroyed. You don't blame him for being depressed over what is possibly the most traumatic thing he will ever have to experience. You don't want to offer him empty platitudes or tell him how to feel, and Steve doesn't want to either, but he can't watch him mope. He loves him too much. 

"Dusty," he teases, "don't be so down. Haven't you seen this glorious and ridiculously enormous bonfire we have going on?" 

"I see it," Dustin says from behind gritted teeth. 

"Hey, do you want to sleep in our tent tonight?" Steve asks, a tad more seriously. "It's warmer with more people, and it's not as crowded as you think it'll be." 

"No, thanks." 

"You could drag your tent closer," you say, quieter, trying not to smother him or embarrass him with parenting he never asked for. 

"I don't like being near the boundary. You guys might be okay with ending up as geek chow but the rest of us have common sense." 

"Well, we didn't really have a choice there," Robin says. 

Which is true. The kids all get to sleep in tents close to the fire, and the adults are a row behind. You guys aged out of the kids category a long time ago, so you're the ones who'll be eaten first, but you're also the ones who'll hear the can alarms when they ring on the tripwires first. 

Steve sleeps with his baseball bat anyhow. 

You disentangle yourself from Steve's grips and meet his eyes. He doesn't need you to tell him, but you give him a look that hopefully says, Maybe you should talk to him. Eyebrows raised gently, lips pursed. 

Steve sighs like he's preparing himself and shuffles around you. He doesn't begrudge Dustin needing cheering up, you know that. He probably just wishes he could offer Dustin more than, "We have food and water and a place to pee." 

Robin crawls right to your side and sets back on her haunches. "Here's what I think we should do." 

"Wait, you don't wanna wait for Steve to explain?" 

"Nope, he'll say no. Me and you have to find the best way to sell it so we can actually go."

"You aren't kidding about the girl's trip?" 

"Nope. Look, the situation is dire. We know where the mall is, we've been there tons of times. The whole group can't go and we don't trust most people to keep us alive anyways, so me, you and Steve will go. We'll sleep there or something too, so there's no pressure on us to rush back and stress out Steve." 

"Wouldn't it be safer to hurry back?" you ask. 

Robin hums. "Maybe. Uh, if we travel at night like I've been thinking about doing I don't think we could hurry back." 

"At night?" 

"We're basically nocturnal at this point." You dip your head toward her mildly. She drops the slight facade she'd had, "I would feel better. If we went at night." 

The College, the community you and your group had inhabited until recently, was attacked and destroyed by raiders. They were likely drawn by the black smoke of the small bonfire in the quad of the campus, lit to celebrate a quasi-thanksgiving. It wasn't supposed to end up the way it had. 

Robin got attacked. Steve was there to help her get away uninjured, earning himself a black eye. She can't sleep if she's by herself anymore. You hate yourself for not being there to protect them. 

She's afraid of being attacked by people rather than geeks now. Travelling at night increases the likelihood of dying via geek (you can't see them, they can smell you), but it vastly decreases the chance of meeting other people. It makes sense that a night time excursion is her preference. 

You just don't know how you feel about it, and you have no clue how you might convince Steve to go along with it.  

"So you want us to hike to the mall at night. Is it on the map? Where even is it?" 

"I don't remember the name, Steve'll know it 'cos we've been there, but what matters is that I know for a fact there's a fancy soap store. I need soap, Y/N. I can't take this anymore. And if I don't brush my teeth soon I'm going to scream, my finger can only do so much." 

Occasionally three of you take a pea sized dollop of paste and rub it over your teeth in an effort to feel less disgusting, the same way that you wash with a rag and cold water behind the treeline, and dunk your clothes in the river without detergent. Water is a good cleaner, but eventually there's a funk in the clothes that can't be washed out without soap, or Robin's current issue: oily hair.

Without soap and toothbrushes, you feel about as disgusting as a person can feel. If you don't make this trip soon, you'll be in the exact same boat as Robin, one bad stain away from screaming. 

"And the fancy soap shop definitely has soap?" 

"Definitely. And there's a department store with blankets, too. We could really improve the quality of our miserable lives." 

"You don't have to convince me," you say, though it might not hurt in actuality. You're hesitant to leave the camp, but if Robin's leaving she can't go without Steve (who would never let her go alone), or you, because you refuse to be separated from Steve (or her, honestly). "It's Grim Fandango who needs greasing." Grim being Steve. 

Steve has managed to wrap an arm around Dustin. You're half-expecting Dustin to be wriggling under his touch, desperate for an escape, a teenage boy allergic to both sincerity and affection, but Dustin's dissolved like jello powder in boiling water, totally slouched into Steve's side. Steve's hand runs the younger boy's upper arm briskly.

"It'll be okay, dude, I promise. We've come this far," Steve says. 

"I'm just tired," Dustin says quietly. 

"Maybe we should sell it, as uh, an enrichment trip," you suggest to Robin. "We can get stuff for the kids, some board games or something." They need an escape. 

"I miss my books," Robin says. 

"Holy shit, me too. Steve says you can tell the plot of every Agatha Christie novel from memory, is that true?" you ask. 

"Only the good ones. Can I lie down on you?" 

You let Robin lie down with her head on your thigh. It can't be comfortable but maybe it's better than the floor, or maybe it's just nice to be close to someone. You like having Robin with you. You'd been so apprehensive of her when you met, not because she was Steve's best friend —though that did worry you to some extent— but because you had trust issues to the neck and she was the first person beside Steve to be nice to you without motivation. In this world, that doesn't check out. 

"What ones do you know?" 

"Murder on the Orient Express?" she offers. 

"Okay. Set the scene, Buckley." 

Steve returns just after the detective finds out that Ratchet has been murdered. "I love this part," he says. 

"Then let me tell it." 

Robin spins for a while, but you peel away from the fire before you're too tired to stand and retreat to your makeshift tent. It's a tarp held up by two sticks and a blanket on the floor, but it works to keep away the rain and most bugs. There's not quite enough room for you three, but there's also literally no other option, and none of you mind. You squeeze in like tinned sardines, sleeping in your coats and shoes. 

In the morning, you and Robin attempt to sell your idea to Steve over lukewarm oxtail soup. You and Steve share. Robin had to tip half into a bowl for someone else. The rationing is going okay. 

You could've ended up with a can of garden peas, or chopped tomatoes.

"It's actually better if it's only us, you see, because we can sneak around and it'll be much quieter. And they don't need us here right now, everything's settled. And me and Y/N want to so we should." 

Steve wraps your hand around the can of soup so you don't touch the hot bottom. He doesn't look like he's even remotely listening to Robin, his eyes on your face and his hands not far behind. He neatens you up, so to speak, scratching a little dirt speck from your cheek and folding the rolled collar of your shirt. "This," he says finally, his hand curling behind your neck, "sounds like a very bad idea." 

You shudder happily as he starts to scratch your neck down to your shoulders. "Steve, what's bad about it? We'll be like the Three Musketeers, travelling in darkness, a mission for the people." 

"Did you ever read that book?" Steve asks, his hand dropping to your shoulder, where it stays for a reverent second. You look gross and he still wants to squeeze you. 

"No," you admit, lips on the sharp edge of your soup. You take a careful sip. 

"We get there quickly, spend a night on the mattresses at the department store, and… Hey, why don't we go live in the mall?" Robin asks. 

The idea of a real mattress is seductive, but not that much. 

"Because we don't want to paint a huge target on our backs?" you ask. 

"I'm kidding." Robin peers down at her soup unhappily. "I really hate oxtail." 

Steve noticeably flickers. He meets your eyes, and you think he's speaking to you in his head. Fucking hell, I can't believe what I'm about to agree to. 

"If you can convince Mrs. Byers to delegate us an actual weapon, then okay, fine, we can go to the mall." He stretches out his mostly healed knee and rubs it with both hands. "Fuck. A knife. Actually, I want each of us to have a weapon. So if you can somehow magic that into being, we can go." 

"I don't see why we even had to ask permission," Robin jokes, "like it's the sixties or something." She springs up to her feet, forces her oxtail soup into the hands of one of the preteens by the fire, and beelines for the small crowd of kids surrounding one much taller Joyce. 

"You'd still come with us even if you didn't want to," you say. 

"Yeah, obviously. Robin's right, this isn't the sixties. That being said, if it was a worse plan, I'd tie you to a tree." 

"I could be into that," you tease, pleased when he scoffs through a laugh. His elbow drives into your side. "Stop, fiend." 

"No, fiend. Take the force of my elbow." He nudges you. 

You elbow back. He elbows harder. You potentially give him a bruise and feel extremely bad when he "Oofs," aloud. 

"Sorry," you say, climbing up on your knees to put your arms on his shoulders. "Sorry, sorry, sorry." 

He shoves you away from him and you're evil, you're selfish, you want him to dote. You fall flat on your back in the dirt and grass, covering your smile with the crook of your elbow so he doesn't immediately know you're fine. 

"Shit," he cusses, kneeling between your legs, moving to hover over you. "I didn't mean to knock you down…" He sees your smile. "You lying conniving trickster." 

You smile harder, lips pressed together and your chest light as a feather for the first time in days, until suddenly he's squished on top of you and pressing down. "Ow," you fake, wriggling away from him. "I think there's a twig in my brain." 

He wriggles with you. "You suck, you made me think I hurt you." 

"Don't be a wuss, I get hurt all the time, how do you even know I'm not hurt?" 

He sighs all quiet and lifts your head off of the grass. "I can't see through your hair," he says, "did it actually hurt?" 

You take his face into your hands. Your fingers are very cold, but he doesn't flinch. 

"I'm messing with you, H." 

"When did that nickname catch on?" 

You rub his cheeks with your thumbs. Fingers behind his ears, you smooth over his short scratchy stubble affectionately. Quick, you lift your chin and touch your lips to his. It's hardly a kiss. 

He leans down slowly and makes it a better one. 

"Stop," Robin says, kicking you in the ribs. She isn't cruel about it, more of a toe touch. 

"Oh, hi, that was a quick rejection," you say, frowning. 

Robin beams. "Actually, we've been approved. One knife apiece and a request for children's clothes. Get packing!" 

She whizzes off in another direction, seemingly to pack and gather the allocated weaponry. 

Steve drops his chin back down to you. 

"Does she have secret things we don't know about?" he asks. 

You scratch his scalp, "Mm… I'm not supposed to tell you." 

He sits up. You frown.

"She really has a secret stash?"

"No, Steve," you laugh. "No, of course she doesn't. Where would she hide them?" 

Steve yanks you up by the arm playfully. You pretend to fight him, but it's no use. You'll do anything he wants you to. 

—

Steve didn't necessarily think that a hike through the outskirts of an infested city would be easy, but he also hadn't realised it would be this boring. Especially a trip he's already made in the past. Boring and kind of hard. 

It's not because you aren't capable —you might've taken a hit when The College collapsed, but you've mostly recovered, and your endurance is good. You have the best survival skills you've ever had, and Robin is similarly ready for whatever it is that might get thrown at you. Too bad preparation doesn't make you a ninja. 

He isn't at his peak and he was no man of steel beforehand, and although he was good enough to keep you both alive, he's not sure if it's still true. Plus, he wasn't expecting to feel so moody. 

You're marching on like a true warrior next to him, your hand around his wrist and swinging gently, your eyes on the ground. Steve's flashlight carves a weak path through the dusk. Soon, it'll be completely dark, and that's when he imagines his worrying will reach a fever pitch. 

For now, he tries to be chill. 

"Is my hand not good enough for you?" he asks. 

"I figure you can pull away from me quicker if you need to if we're not, like, sewed together." 

"You have weird hands," Robin interjects. "They're big. I wouldn’t hold them either.” 

"That's why they're nice hands, Robin," you say. "Well, maybe they're just nice because I love him."

"I love him. Mostly. He still has weird hands," she says. 

"You don't get it," you say. 

You wrap your arms around his bicep and hug it quickly before backing away again. He thinks you kiss his coat, but he really can't tell. 

"I don't think I want to get it," Robin says.

You're quieter when you ask, "Is that really true? You don't want to be in love?" 

In the dark, and at night, it's quiet. It's nearly always quiet everywhere you go nowadays, but it feels immense this far from the camp. Steve is on edge. Too distracted for heart to hearts. But he wants to know the answer too, so he stays nice and quiet. 

"I love that you're in love," Robin says lightly. "And I love you both. But I've seen you guys when you think you're going to lose each other, and surviving is hard enough without… that." 

You let your hand slide down to his hand, your palm flat to the top, not holding it but holding him. 

Steve clears his throat. "It's worth losing my mind every time she decides to wander off because of the peace she gives me when we're together." 

"The peace?" Robin asks. She sounds like she wants to be incredulous but his sincerity has tripped her up. 

"I'm with her and…" He can see the side of your face in the flashlight. You're smiling shyly, your gaze on the grass beneath your shoes. Footsteps rustle in the gap of his words. "I don't want to be anywhere else as long as she's there." 

"It sounds like a toothache," Robin says. 

"You know, I used to get bad toothaches all the time before we found you, and Steve made me a teeth guard out of a leather armchair with a pen knife and a needle and thread." 

"Did you just make that up? Trying to convince me about the magic of love?" Robin asks. 

"No, he really made it for me, I used to keep it in my nightstand," you say. He can hear your smile.

He made it because watching you cry from toothache left him feeling powerless. A guy who'd never even held a needle and thread before bent over his lap with a flashlight in the hours while you slept until his eyes burned because watching you sniffle made him feel sick. He can't describe the ache of it, loving you but not having kissed you, or even really told you, his girl so stressed at night your jaw had locked tight and you were reduced to whimpers each morning. Having to watch you pretend it wasn't happening until you couldn't, until you broke down crying with your hand wrapped around his wrist like it is now. Sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Steve, I just– I want– I don't know– I can't– 

He was useless. He was stupid. He could barely bring himself to rub your back because he thought another touch might knock you over. 

Calm down, honey, he'd murmured. Just calm down.

He never could've imagined seeing you cry like that before he did. You couldn't move. You explained it like a headache when words became feasible again, which, Steve's had headaches; concussive migraines that were white hot and everywhere. So he could imagine it even if he'd never felt it, and there wasn't a single thing he could do about it. Willing to try anything, he'd even wondered if he could pull your tooth out himself. Mouth surgery is prone to infection, and he couldn't face levelling that amount of pain onto you personally. So rather than fix the tooth, he'd have to fix the stress. He couldn't fix the stress, so he looked for anything at all to ease the pain. Ibuprofen, codeine, even a course of antibiotics. And then, finally, the leather mouth guard. Leather stacked and sewed with sanitised, loving hands. 

"It's weird what that kind of love can bring out of you," Steve says quietly, matching the surroundings. "I did a great job. I'm a seamstress." 

Robin pretends to throw up generously and noisily. Steve shushes her. You, in a very good mood with no signs of calming down, laugh behind your hand. 

"I can make you another one," he offers. He hadn't thought about it yet, but of course you don't have it anymore. Anything in your nightstand is lost forever. 

"You might need to. I'll be a stressed mess all over again if we don't find some socks, I can feel my ankle bone piercing the back of my shoes," you say. No socks either. 

Robin's flashlight turns quickly to the right. You and Steve flinch at the same time to guard the other, peering in the exposed direction. There aren't many trees around here, so all to be seen is yellow-green grass and empty air. 

"Sorry, I got the heebies," Robin says. "Maybe it was your disgusting declarations of love." 

"Hardy-har. Where the fuck do you think we are right now?" Steve asks. 

"Wait, you don't know?" you ask. 

"You have the map," he says back. 

"Oh, right. But how do we navigate in the dark? We don't have a compass." 

"I have the compass!" Robin announces. 

"From where?" you ask. 

"How did you think we'd get there in the dark, angel?" Steve asks you genuinely. 

He doesn't have time to wonder if it's okay to call you angel. He's never done it before, but it felt right in the moment. You're kind of like an angel, protective and sweet and a symbol for goodness. 

"I thought because you guys already knew where it was– we– we set off while it was still light! I assumed we'd just walk straight." 

Steve and Robin laugh at you, but not without love. 

You pretend to sulk for a while, though you shine your flashlight at the map when he asks, your arm threaded through his and face leaning on his shoulder. "I'm so confused," you mumble. 

"Don't worry. I know where we are now," he says.

"No, I know where we are too, but I'm confused as to why I thought this was a good idea." 

"This is a good idea because I've had greasy hair for two weeks and I feel like a worm," Robin says. "And we need blankets, and moisturiser, and to feel like real people."

Steve has a better list than that. He needs moisturisers for your cracked hands, antiseptic for the healing cut on your thigh. He needs shaving foam or at the least a goddamn razor, a new shirt, you both need underwear and you're in dire need of shoes that fit. He wouldn't mind a compression support for his knee, a pair of scissors, and most of all a box of cigarettes —a quick trip to the pharmacy would fix a lot of problems. 

"I feel pretty real." 

"You're real pretty," Steve says quickly. 

"Yes! Oh, yes! Kiss?" you cheer, delighted at his swift wit. 

Steve knows —he knows— you're putting on a brave face for him. He cried on your shoulder and you haven't cried since. You're being the strong one. You're trying to make it work. 

You've always been the strong one. Steve has taken care of you so many times; held your hand in torrential rain when you were too tired to go on; scrambled through rotten floorboards to find you on your back and unconscious, fed you water in your sleep half-worried you were dying and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He's fought for you, the dead and the living —he would do worse for you. But you've done the impossible, surviving every ache and pain, coming back from things he didn't think you would. You crawled through glass for him. You stumbled in the dark bleeding and exhausted to do as he asked, to meet him at the end of an endless day. 

He gives you the kiss you asked for. There's only one clue that you aren't as happy as you seem. Your breath catches as he leans down, like you thought he might not give you one after all. 

It takes you hours to get there and way longer than you thought. You don't realise you're upon it until the grass turns to roads under your feet, and the road turns to parking lot. There's a shattering of glass spread over the floor like a spilled bag of salt that crunches under your shoes. Steve grips your elbow and the three of you creep inside past the doors. They're open, which is bad and good. Bad because someone's been here since the last time, and might still be inside. Good, because Steve's not sure any of you have the energy to open them. 

"I don't think I have to say this, but please, let's whisper from here," Steve suggests. 

"Damn, do we have to?" Robin whispers. "I was just about to start my rendition of Singing in the Rain." 

You laugh through your nose. 

"We'll go up to the bedding store, okay? And we'll grab some blankets, and then we'll find a storage room and barricade ourselves in."

"Steve, I wanna sleep on a mattress," Robin whines. 

"But we don't know who's here," he says. "Buckley, I swear, I'll carry a mattress back to camp for you if that's what you want, but we have to live to see the morning first." 

"It's not like we haven't done it before," you say, nudging her gently. "Can we go back to whispering? I'm really nervous. I don't want to attract anything." 

"Sorry," Robin whispers. 

Being outside in the dark had felt horrifying but mostly manageable. Being inside is terrifying too, and though your flashlights make it easy to navigate now that there's walls for the light to reflect off of, it's scarier knowing this is an enclosed space. You can only run so far in either direction. 

Your fingers twist in the corner of his hoodie. He doesn't say anything. For a split second, he remembers you doing it in the past, before he'd even thought about kissing you, when you were scared and he was more angry than anything else (though not usually at you). He'd pretend he didn't feel it. He was a bitch but he was never cruel, and if you needed to scrunch the hem of his jacket in your hand to feel better then that was alright. 

"You okay?" he murmurs. 

"I'm okay. I think my cut is weeping." 

"What?" he asks, head clicking as he turns to you. "Since when?"

"Not sure, it just feels weird, like it's wet." 

"This is the kind of thing I'd love to know." Steve sighs. "The bedding place is up here somewhere. You can let me take a look at it." 

You, Steve and Robin walk up the frozen escalators, your footsteps making banging metal sounds that echo through what feels like the entire mall. Hackles raised, Steve ushers you both into the bedding store, pulling Robin by the sleeve before she can stop to deliberate over blankets to the very back of the store where a door demarcates the Staff Only room. 

"Listen," he whispers, "we are going to go in there back to back, just like we always do. Robs, I promise, as soon as I've checked her leg, I'll help you do whatever you want. Cool?" 

"My leg is fine." 

"If it gets infected, I know for a fact there aren't any antibiotics here," he says. They've looked. "We have to stay in front of it. Are you ready?" 

"Steve, we're not amateurs," Robin says. She hums. "Okay, I might be, but you owe Y/N some respect." 

"No, I'm an amateur." 

"You're not an amateur," Steve says. "Girls, please." 

"Can we veto 'girls'? I want to be dudes," Robin says. 

"Robin–" 

"Okay, okay! Let's do it." 

—

You wake up with the driest mouth in the world, your head bumping from hunger and bad sleep —the floor still feels like the floor, no matter how many pillows you have— to sounds just outside of the door. 

You hike up on elbows and feel your heart climb into your mouth. Steve's hand is on your neck, and Robin's foot is over your calf, and this is a very bad time to be locked in, especially weighed down as you are by fleece blankets. 

"Steve," you whisper, blindly reaching out with your own hand. You accidentally smack him in the face with the base of your thumb. "Oh, shit, sorry. Steve, there's something outside." 

He's impressively alert when he opens his eyes. He couldn't have been sleeping deeply. "What kind of something?" he whispers back, sitting up. 

He pushes the blankets away and climbs onto his knees. The noise happens again, quickly followed by a smash and a third sound like a thump. 

Robin flinches awake next to you. You put your hand on her shoulder, hoping it says, Hey, it's fine, you're fine.

"Where's your bag?" Steve asks you, standing up tall.

It's disgusting, but you're holed up in the employee bathroom. As far from the toilet and sinks as physically possible but with a buffer from the door. Staying in a storage closet hadn't been possible, the staff room door hanging off the hinges enough to not close, and the storage room a medium space crammed to bursting with mattresses and shelves of sheets that wobbled threateningly when touched. 

Your bag is somewhere under the blankets. You scramble onto your knees and search for it. You'd put your things away for the sake of neatness. Silly move.  

"Here," you say, pulling out a flashlight for Steve. He takes it into one hand, pen knife in the other unsheathed. "It's probably a geek." 

"Yeah. Can you put your shoes on?" he asks, not unkindly. 

You shake yourself and do as he asks you to. Robin helps you up. Steve creeps to the door, waiting for you both before he opens it into the main floor. 

"I don't think we need the torch," Robin says. 

Daylight illuminates the room through the windows set in the west wall. You all squint and step out, arms in defensive positions, treading softly so as not to be heard. 

Another thump. You can't hear footsteps, exactly, just the occasional, irregular thump. Geeks are usually noisier. Dragging steps. They'll walk into walls if they're following a specific scent. 

Steve turns to you both and raises his eyebrows. Brace yourselves. 

He hits the butt of the knife into the wall three times. 

Nothing shows itself. You stand frozen for a few minutes anyways, even when Steve and Robin decide they want to venture further into the room and scope out the place. You watch their backs, heart still pounding and with no signs of stopping. 

“Oh, fuck,” Steve curses. 

“What?” you and Robin hiss at the same time. 

“Come here. Y/N, come over here,” he says, like you aren’t already half-way across the floor to meet them. 

Steve gestures at a showcase bed with velvet purple sheets. They’re not even dusty, no signs of time or wear, nothing to speak of a different age. Nothing, that is, beside the dead bird on the pillowcases, and the carpeting of fur surrounding it. It's odd for Steve to point you towards any gore, and you're a tad shocked, until he takes your forearm in his hand and pulls you in front of him. "See?" he murmurs. 

He points to the pillow. You follow his finger. 

Robin speaks first. Correction, Robin squeaks first. 

"Is that a cat?" she asks, all the excitement of her discovery squashed tightly into a frankly impressive whisper-shout. 

Robin refuses to move after that. She begs Steve for some of the dried jerky (of unknown origin and animal) from the rucksack and lays down on her stomach when the tugged tabby you've found flees beneath the bed frame. "Here, kitty," she murmurs, her gentlest tones. "Come on, killer, I need your help." 

Steve nudges you.

"Oh, you're talking to me?" you ask Robin.

"I need your help," Robin insists, looking at you from over her shoulder. Her hair is limp around her face, her cheeks flushed red with excitement. "She has to know we're all friends."

"Watch my back?" you ask Steve. 

He sits on the end of the bed, "Don't have to ask." 

You set down carefully next to Robin and peer under the bed for the tabby. Your arrival has scared her half to death. 

"Maybe she's only used to seeing geeks," you say. 

"Maybe she thinks we're geeks," Robin says agreeably. 

"Me and Steve found a dog once, but he wouldn't let us touch. He begged for food and then he ran away," you say. 

"The dog wouldn't let you touch him, or Steve wouldn't let you touch the dog?" Robin asks, waving the jerky around.

"A bit of both." 

"Kitty," Robin sings. 

"Oh, god, this is comfy as fuck," Steve mumbles, laying down in bed. "Robin, you have to get up and watch your six, babe." 

You and Robin laugh in sync and aloud at his 'babe'. It's you who stands and continues taking mild guard. You're not worried about intruders anymore, thinking that any company would have presented itself already, but you like keeping them safe. You take check of every corner of the room, spinning in the world's slowest circle. Robin baby talks to the cat under the bed while offering scraps of jerky. Steve, having curled away from the bird, lets his fingertips brush your thigh each time you turn. 

"Getting dizzy?" he asks. 

"Yes. And hungry, too, which is a weird feeling together. Can I have some of the jerky?" 

Steve offers the bag. "If you're hungry, eat what you want, but if you can keep it to a little portion just in case we can't find anything else, honey…" 

You stop spinning so much to eat jerky. You eat more than you should, you hunger a cruel, sharpened thing that jabs from your stomach and up into your diaphragm. You hand Steve back the bag before you can eat someone else's share and decide to focus on the other negatives in your life, like your shoes. 

"Can we look for shoes soon?" you ask. 

"Yeah, honey," Steve says. Honey, honey. His voice is soft with an ever-present fatigue. 

"I don't think this cat likes me very much," Robin says, still singing. 

"She's just scared. Maybe if we leave and come back again she'll realise we're friendly," Steve says. 

"Yes sir." Robin stands, brushing herself down. "Oh, ew, Steven, how can you lie there? You know the cat's probably spayed all over that bed, right?" 

Steve springs up. "Okay, ew." 

“It’s okay,” she says. “Let’s go get some new clothes.”

It’s harder than it should be. The three of you move from store to store on high alert for what has to be an hour, searching for practical, fitting clothes. The time for modesty is over, and you take turns changing in front of one another while the others make sure you aren’t about to become naked geek feed. You’re so unclean that putting clean clothes on feels wrong, but you do it anyhow. You double back to the store with suitcases and bags and fill a suitcase to bursting point with the clothes that Joyce requested for the children. You sit yourselves down at some point, always exhausted, to try on sneakers. The relief of finding and changing into a pair that fits cannot be understated. When you’re sure there’s at least pants and a sweater for every child, you pack up and head for the fancy soap shop. 

Robin is ecstatic. Ideally, you can all carry one bag on your shoulders and pull one suitcase, so you each fill a bag with soaps and brushes and powders, figuring that if you find food or medication worth carrying you can empty one of the bags rather than double back. 

“I’m sorry we didn’t actually sleep on a mattress,” Steve says. 

Robin shrugs nonchalantly, kicking aside an empty helium tank with her foot as you pass by a card and gift store. She’s grown less happy as time goes on, unsatisfied with the day's events. Finding nice soap hadn’t felt important with no water around to use it. The cat was rabid, you’re all living off of jerky and river water, and now you have to hike home again in the dark, hours of fear and tenseness. 

“I miss your car,” Robin says. 

You hadn’t ever been in Steve’s car, but you say, “Me too.”

“Maybe we should find a real tent,” Steve says, apparently not listening. 

“Isn’t that kind of mean?” Robin asks. 

“I mean, if the others wanted a tent, they could’ve come.”

“I don’t think it's mean,” you say. “But I don’t see how we can carry it.”

“I can carry it,” Steve says. “Just a small one. Big enough for us.”

“Does us include me?” Robin asks. 

Steve laughs. “Duh, it includes you. It’s Y/N that’s gonna have to sleep outside.”

“Or me and her can have the tent and you can be our watchdog.”

“We can’t, um, stay outside forever, right?” you ask quietly. 

Steve puts his arm over your shoulder for a quick squeeze. “No, we can’t. We’ll find somewhere permanent soon. There’s barely any geeks the more we get into Michigan, who knows. Maybe there's none at all up top. But…" He lets you go. "I'll find somewhere." 

"Steve, you sound ridiculous," Robin says. "'I'll find somewhere,'" she quotes, voice deepened. 

Robin might joke, but you feel reassured by Steve's promise. You keep your head up for the rest of the day. 

— 

Later, much later, when you've travelled back to the camp with aching everythings and taken the world's coldest bath in the river nearby, you, Robin and Steve pitch your brand new tent and near collapse. It was night when you finally reached the camp that day, and so it was morning by the time you laid down. Steve has to admit that bathing and building a tent in the dark had been fun, annoying and indicative of the situation but a pleasure anyhow, to hear his favourite people in the whole world trying not to shriek at the cold water, overjoyed and laughing as you finally washed your face with real soap, and terrified that the river would knock you down. 

You're shaking with the cold now in his arms, practically sitting on his thigh as you brush his still damp hair back from his eyes. 

"I can't believe you're still cold," he says, kissing the line of your jaw affectionately. 

Robin, despite hours without sleep, had volunteered to help Sarah corral the younger kids for some early breakfast. Steve thinks it's because she likes Sarah. Your theory was that she's generous enough to give you a half hour of privacy. She's good like that. 

Whatever it is, you're alone for the first time in days. It's no different than when you're with friends, only you're touchier and Steve's an honest fool. 

You wrap one of your new blankets tighter around your shoulders and shift. "Am I hurting you?" 

"Nope." He squeezes you tightly to his front. "You're shivering. Put your hands under my shirt." 

You do it quickly, smiling like he's given you the world. "'Member when you'd let me do this? Even when we weren't really dating?" 

"We were dating," he says. 

"What, before or after the taco truck incident?" 

"Before," he says sharply. He pauses. "Alright, maybe not then. But we were definitely dating when you'd put your hands in my shirt. You don't do that for just anyone, I'm not a run around." 

"Steve, you used to let me sleep in your lap. Like, a month after we met." 

"'Cos you get so damn cold," he says. You're still shivering. He rests his cheek against your neck. "If I didn't let you, you'd spend the whole night shivering and making these really sad sounds." 

He's not even teasing. Just being honest. 

"I'm sensitive," you say. 

"You're used to sleeping indoors like a normal person." 

You ease off of his lap. He doesn't want you to; he'd keep you close forever. Plus, he feels guilty cuddling you in front of Robin because he knows public displays are uncomfortable, so he wants to really take you in while he can. 

"I have something to tell you," you say. 

"Oh?" 

"Or, something to give you. But I can tell you something if that matters." 

"Tell me anything." Everything. He wants to know everything you have to say. 

"Well… well, before this happened…" You rummage through the bag you'd brought home with you, the tip of your tongue peaking out. "You know, before the world half ended, I wasn't– I don't know if I can say it." 

"Please?" he asks. 

You pull something into your hand. "Alright. I didn't think I'd ever fall in love. And then the world ended, and I really didn't think I would, but you found me and I love you, so it wasn't true." 

He thinks about it. You, years ago, when he'd see you in the halls at school or walking home. He doesn't have much recollection of you beyond that, but it aches in a weird way to think you'd been walking around feeling like you wouldn't be loved. 

Steve licks his lips. "I get it, because I kind of worried the same thing. Like I'd keep loving people more than they loved me." 

"And then you met Robin?" 

"Exactly. She taught me more about love as my best friend than any of the girlfriends I had." 

"Well, I didn't get a Robin back then, but I have you now, and I guess I want you to know it's important to me," you say. "I know things are so hard right now, I know," —you clear your throat as emotion creeps in to your tone— "you put on a brave face for me. I know you're tired. But I keep going for you, and you keep going for me, and I want you to have something so you remember that even if I'm… not around." 

Steve sits up straight. "Hey, you're not going anywhere." 

You blink rapidly.

"Where is it that you think you're going without me?" he asks, softer. 

"Nowhere. But I just need you to know how much I loved you." 

"Love," he corrects. 

"How much I love you," you agree, sniffling. You look around at the tent floor, your shoulders raised just so. "Sorry, I'm not gonna cry or anything, I just hate thinking about it." 

You hand him something wrapped in a new sock. He bites his lip to stop from laughing at the wrapping and unpeels his gift. 

It's a watch. Silver, heavy, glass unscathed and hands tick tick ticking. Steve doesn't know if the time is accurate. His old watch broke a long time ago, but this one looks vaguely similar. 

"You gave me a necklace, once, with a little diamond. I know I don't have it anymore, I shouldn't have taken it off. But you gave it to me when I was miserable, and I know you're not miserable, but–" 

"I am," he says, rubbing his thumb over the watch. There's a tiny diamond set at the bottom of the clock face. He has no idea why, but the idea that you saw it and remembered his gift that long ago, that you wanted him to know you love him, that pays for some truth. "I'm miserable. I'm so scared for us." He breathes out hard. "Sorry." 

Steve's eyes tear up. He tries not to let it show, but he's looking down at the watch and his vision is blurring, and he's thinking Fuck, fuck, I'm crying in front of her again. 

You shuffle across the plastic floor toward him and clutch his hand. He's shaking minutely. You must feel it.

"It's okay, baby," you murmur. 

He ducks his head. 

"It's okay. I know," you say. 

"I know that you know," he says. 

"But it's hard," you prompt. 

"Yeah." 

You needle your arm behind his neck and him close. He can't hold back anymore, throwing his arms around your waist because why would you say that stuff to him? You're so evil, you're horrible, you're the very best thing that's ever happened to him and he loves you and what if you do die? Nobody will ever, ever be like you. There's no one out there with your smile, nobody who turns at the sound of his voice as you do, happy before you've set eyes on him and ecstatic when you have. 

And if you live (please, God, if you live), Steve wants to give you a better life than this. He's constantly panicking because he doesn't know how. 

But you don't mind. You don't love him less for the situation. 

"I don't even know what to tell you," you say, stroking the hair at the back of his neck tenderly, "cos I tell you I love you so much it doesn't feel like what I mean. I love you. I love you, Steve." 

He hugs you until he's not crying, wishing his cheeks would dry themselves when he finally raises his head and kisses your cheek. "Thank you," he says roughly. 

Steve sits back and wipes his nose. You offer the sock. He laughs and bats it away. 

"I love you, too," he says. He thrusts his wrist at you. "Strap me in?" 

You fasten Steve's watch and, in what's becoming a theme, you kiss his pulse. 

"Sorry things have been so hard," you say, adjusting the watch until it's sat comfortably.

"You make it easier." 

"Guys!" Robin says, forcing her way into the tent with an exuberant smile on her face. There's something in her arms, a wriggling mass of matted fur. "Look! The cat followed us home! I'm gonna name him Stinkyboy! Or Shark. Get up, I need help catching a fish!" She waves the cat's paw at you both. "I knew he liked me!" 

—-

the Steve zombie au

[kevinsdsy]

aftg x scott pilgrim with Kevin Day as Ramona and his seven exes are:

Jean Moreau

Jeremy Knox

Andrew Minyard

Nathaniel Wesninski

Thea (i forgot her last name)

R*ko Moriyama

Aaron Minyard

With Robin Cross as Scott but since I'm tweaky like that, in this AU they wouldn't get together, it would be more of a "if you wanna play Exy with me, you have to go against my 7 evil ex partners" or something idk. I just rewatched it last night with friends and the brainrot consumed me lol

oh and Neil would be Wallace. "You already put him in the exes list?" I put Nathaniel, not the same ☝

"if you wanna play exy with me, you have to go against my 7 evil ex partners" IS SUCH A FUN PROMPT OMGGG I WOULD LOVE TO READ A FIC LIKE THAT OMG + i loved watching scott pilgrim vs the world so much i kind of really need this now

[melanodis]

@springonmytraptillicomeback

on it boss jeremike headcanons weeeee

After Evan's death, Michael was more or less a complete social outcast in high school. Abandoned by those he formerly called friends, eating lunch alone. Of course, he understood that it was well deserved after ruminating on it with a fresh outlook. However, Jeremy saw an emo boy in need of fixing (/hj) and did just that.

It was Jeremy's idea to color Michael's hair red. Quite the first introduction to Mrs. Afton.

After the bite, Jeremy consequentially lost a lot of his fine motor control function, which made writing, holding things, and even eating difficult. But the human body is swag as fuck and if one part of the brain is damaged, it can literally remap those neural pathways to another part of the brain.

Of course, this takes as little as a few months to even years to fully complete.

In the meantime, Michael helped him with writing, drove him around, and whatever other difficulties he faced.

Modern day, while Jeremy will still never be back to 100%, he can manage most things without much difficulty save for things that require the utmost precision, like soldering.

While he didn't lose his right eye in the bite, it was completely useless, if not able to see just vague light and shadows, because even blind people still see something. Occasional flashes of light, nerves trying to connect. He would later get it removed and replace it with an interchangeable glass eye.

Jeremy drives a Subaru WRX. Because he's gay. (/ref) His car is kitted out with various mobility aids, like an altered shifter, steering, and hand controls for acceleration and brakes.

In the same vein, Michael still drives his deadbeat father's 1974 Challenger R/T (in Plum Crazy Purple, of course) and maintains it as well as its probably the only good thing his father ever did for him. It rides like a sled on a bed of rocks, so he much prefers to ride with Jeremy if possible.

Jeremy actually loves to cook and bake, blame it on the stoner brain, but damn if he doesn't know what's good. He actually shares these recipes between Henry and Adelaide, and they share theirs with him. Gotta make sure her boy is getting treated well.

Conversely, Michael cannot cook. At all. DO NOT LET HIM COOK. This man can only make microwave meals.

They got married in 2013, right after gay marriage was first legalized in Utah (later rescinded then re-legalized).

After getting scooped, Jeremy happily returned the favor in helping Michael with his affliction. Dressing and redoing his sutures, helping him shower.

Even as Michael felt like a detriment to Jeremy ("I don't deserve you."), Jeremy would insist that there was no other place he'd rather be than to nurse his husband back to health.

I have a comic in the works about this, but because of Jeremy's free lobotomy, he doesn't really process fear the way others do, if at all. When he saw what had become of Michael after months of silence and hiding at Henry's house, his first reaction was something along the lines of "..... siiiiick."

Post scoop, Michael struggles with chronic fatigue and pain, leading him often to be unable to do his own hair properly because of how long he has to hold his arms up. Jeremy has no qualms with this because he absolutely loves doing people's hair.

[stabbyfoxandrew]

just any aftg fics you’ve enjoyed in the last month or so!!! im not picky, they can be whatever ship whatever au or content :) curious and in the mood to read something new……

okay! :D gonna go grab some stuff from my ao3 history. cut because it got long

kandreil:

game changer by peaceoutofthepieces

andreil come to visit kevin in his new apartment and he feels weird about it. but then...

Scrambled by klovnen

kevin gets a concussion!! so sad so good. his bfs take care of him. <3

it's worth a little blood to get your arms free by wyverning

kevin and neil start fucking around but they both really want andrew! (i haven't finished this one yet because it wasn't done when i read it but it is not and i'm hyped to see what happens)

If We Gotta Go (Gotta Go Tonight) by queer_lovebot

andreil teach kevin how to drive and it's so sweet TWT <333

stuck between your teeth like cotton candy by memeyoozi (vernonsgf)

this one is (for now) a two part series!!!! it's pre-kandreil iirc and the second part is MORE of kevin going insane because he's in love with andreil? i need to reread this one. but this writer is amazin

kevjean:

teenage dream by kevjean

kevin comes to california for a visit and he's packing! jean sucks the strap (it's pink/ i'm glad you're not colorblind) it's amazing i have a bouquet of flowers for ao3 user kevjean!!!

andreil:

Caretaking 101: When to Surrender a Sweatshirt by williams_strawberries

mein gott... i've been thinking about this fic for months. andrew thinks neil's about to run away but he's actually built himself a nest for his heat in the tower's basement. it's soooo TwT you'll see what i mean go read it. (no actual smut, just has the abo elements!)

i only need the working of my hands by allyasavedtheday

AMNESIA ANDREW!!! the man who remembers everything forgets what's most important. and has to re-learn who neil is. showstopping... amazing increbdile <- so good my stupid ass forgot how to spell!

keremy:

once in a lifetime by kevjean

jeremy is a popstar and kevin is his biggest fan! they fuck backstage and it's glorious!!! GLORIOUS!!! ao3 user kevjean... i love you<333

kevseth:

Baby Pink by noNic02

ok. this one... made me insane(r). it's not for everyone for sure... but kevin and seth are secretly fucking and kevin wears allison's clothes (kevin is having a lot of gender thoughts in here too... an egg...)

misc:

a detachment and a passive disinterest by memeyoozi (vernonsgf)

not sure where to put this one... kevin is in heat and needs dicked down. nicky volunteers! hooray! but also kevin wants andreil so bad he's insane! (they're all insane your honor) but it's so good? ty sister dayurno for showing me this...

sorry for the terrible formatting i've never really done this before? (i don't think anyhow?) anyway! go read all these okay! ❤️

[ch1-kasak0]

NO PLEASE I LOVE READING CUPHEAD HCS PLEASE PLEASE I HAVE SOME BRO SHARING IS CARING NEOW BROO PLEASEEEE😭

OH GOD I'M SCARED OKAT I'LL JUST LIST OFF THE ONES AT HBE TOP OF MY HEAD

•his conscience is based kinda like a boat tower thing where there's this big ass building that has a light that changes colour based on his emotions and when he goes into a black out it shines red really bright and there's like black and yellow accents

•most of the beings in his conscience/conscious idk are different vers of him and there's one of him that's a whole ass wendigo

•really likes cats, cats r his fave animal omg

• will wood, MSI and maybe mitski coded idk

•cuddle bug, if he falls asleep in yo arms you r NOT moving🙏

•lowkey bi, screw the wiki he's def kissed some men

•can cook, but can only cook what kettle has taught him, couldn't make a simple fried egg but could cook a while 5* steak and mash no problem and could make the best cakes ever (credits to baroness von bon bon she def taught him💪)

•has probably been fed human before by blackhat and flug

•used to be besties w dementia

•mamas boy🙏

•is the one out of him and mugs that can actually save money somehow even though he's the one who has a gambling addiction

•remember the fight w him and bendy where bends bit his arm? Yeah, that arm is completely numb, occasionally nibbles on it like a stress toy

•would cry if someone gave him a cat on his birthday, especially if it was old asf or disabled in some way, would care for it like his own child

•no idea what happened between him and meg but would also cry if he had to face her again (she would humiliate his ass like the queen she is🎀)

•has had the most questionable convos w Jeremy Fairfax ever

•lowkey would be a small spoon when he's sad

•has really nice nails and actually natural eyeliner, like he looks like he's wearing eyeliner but he isn't he just built that way

•man boobs, had a breast reduction during his heart surgery non-consentually😭

•walks like a model (natural catwalk or whatever but not as dramatic)

•i honestly feel like demitasse wouldn't accept him as her son because of his demon blood :(

•one of his eyes has a yellow spot near his pupil and the other has a pink spot near the edge of his iris (I'm not sure if it's heterochromia or central heterochromia)

•cried so hard he had a panic attack when he woke up after nearly dying during the experiment when he was like 13 and mugs was scared for him :((((

•his pupils expand like a cat when he sees someone he loves or when he eats sugary stuff (cat coded💪💪)

•his nails r claw like, meow ig

•goes limp when ppl touch his hair, like that shit hits different he will melt that's why he hates it when ppl touch his hair

•knows like one dance meg taught him, and just so happens he only knows the woman's role so it's basically useless to him

•Quadratus once told him to look at the stars to guide him (when he had just lost to the devil and was about to leave inkwell isles) and if the stars failed him to turn to the oceans waters and call to quadratus for help (I like to think quadratus can just spawn in any water source but only if u use a certain rune that cup knows)

•lowkey really likes learning about cannibalism and crazy shit like that

•along with wood lillies, some of his fave flowers r black dahlias, roses, lily of the valley, spider lilies, and others🙏🙏

Let me know is there is anymore type of headacmons u wanna know about I have angst, NSFW and probably a lot more idk🙏🙏 holy shit I need to learn how to spell and type slowly😭

[capturecharlesau]

This fic will be about me venting on this exact day of when Danny ACCIDENTALLY ALMOST hurt Auriela and Florence BUT when in reality it was Danny’s shadow Daniel! I’m here a year later to break the ice! And finally give my baby justice! >:) I hope you guys enjoy! :D

I’m not a professional at these but imma try my best lol! If ya see any English mistakes just in case remember I speak French and this English typing/spelling be hard xD

Not My Fault

Danny was walking down the halls… that day finally came around…. Funny… last year he remembers all the pain getting beaten up and even punished for something he didn’t mean to do. Almost killing the twins… he didn’t mean it he swear he didn’t he was so sad… and depressed he was crying alone in the kitchen he remembers how Amelia, Ulle, and others hurt Danny that day how the Music Enforcers spun Danny around upside down on a rope it made Danny very dizzy and he puked that day…

Danny could barely walk that day and the only people who took pity on him that day was Crusher, Pollo, Reginald, RHM, Sven, and Burt. Was it pity? Or was it…. Love…? True love like Crusher felt kissing Danny at night…? Feeling him, rubbing him, feeling his hair, his nice and hot kisses, the deep “connection” they feel nice and close with each other~…. Is that true love? It’s partly love but the TRUE love Danny felt with Crusher apart from physical is the EMOTIONAL help he felt… wow did Crusher help Danny feel warm and calm that night. So relaxed so comforting to Danny’s ears… all Danny really needs is his one and only Crusher. After the shitty day he had and feeling nauseous after the boys spun him and the others hurt him…. It made him feel like a monster… a monster with explosive emotions that he can’t control… why can’t he control these feelings? These emotions? He deserve it! Did he? He almost hurt two babies….

He doesn’t deserve Mary his beautiful baby daughter… all his life he wanted a family but now he looks in the mirror and sees himself as a MONSTER!! He doesn’t have friends, he doesn’t have a family, he’s a piece of shit, he let… HIM …. HIM use him like a TOY, he FOLLOWED HIM, yes he was manipulated but he should have DONE SOMETHING!! Why was he FROZEN and let his negativity drive him to do the wrong thing when all he wants…. Is for people to love him and for him to be happy that he exists….

Why did Randy curse him? All he wanted was to help his dear father…but…. He was now stuck with his evil version of himself… telling him LIES, telling him negative things, …. Danny was addicted… he found himself addicted to sadness… and thinking how his friends, his family, his Toppat family, his husband would maul him, cut him, HURT HIM, kill him, humiliate him over and over and over and over and OVER

….and over… and over….. and over…. And over…. Why won’t it stop? Why won’t these thoughts go away?…. What’s wrong with my brain?…. Why am I like this?….. why do I exist? If all I do … and all I think and hear are ways…. The people around me… wanna…. Kill me? I don’t deserve anything at all… I just want my breathing to…. Suddenly….stop….

…

“You deserve good things dear…” Danny opened his eyes in shocked as he was on the floor crying in the kitchen “A-Amore? O-Oh b-b-but how—?” Crusher kissed and picked up Danny “Dear, you were hiccuping and crying … And you were talking a bit hehe…”

“…..” Danny showed hidden eyes. Crusher frowned “Dear I know today was … you know… the day Daniel made you do that… I knew you’d be upset… so we wanted to show you something…”

“…we?” Said Danny as Crusher walked out the kitchen to see all his closest friends there all coming in to hug Danny at the same time as Crusher carried Danny still.

Reginald giggled “Nyeh hello dear! Danny’s eyes widen “R-Reggie?? Jeremy? Svensson, Bertram, Picoletto? What’s happening?? *he tears up* Aahhhh I-I-I don’t deserve t-t-this! Whatever it issss! *hic*—.”

Crusher gave many kisses to Danny’s cheek to calm him down. “It’s ok pai!” Said Pollo “We are here to support you in your apology! Even though we know it wasn’t you really who wanted to hurt the twins.”

“Ja! Burt saw it all in the cameras” said Sven as Burt added “You were… REALLY twitchy before you entered the room to harm the babies…”

“You guys would really support me?” Danny shivered “ I don’t d-deserve it-! *hic* I d-d-don’t-!”

“Yes you do Dan…” said Accordion along with Violin holding the twins “ We know it was not your fault now… Burt showed us the footage…. We shouldn’t have been so… extreme—.”

Danny then interrupts crying“ NO! IM HAPPY YOU HURT ME! IM BAD IM HORRIBLE-! *HIC* I’M—!!”

Violin then said “ A human with emotions….”

Those words many Danny cry in his hands as Pollo RUSHED to his father and Crusher hugged his hubby tightly. “Give them the gift Dan” RHM smiled as Danny gaged the twins bagels. “I made them *hic* myself-! Please f-f-forg-give m-me-! *hic*

…

The twins jumped onto Danny’s lap as the Italian man was so overwhelmed “I’m sorry! I’m s-so sorry! How can anybody or ANYONE so perfect like you guys can …..

… ever love someone…..like….me…?

…

Thank you guys to my fellow Tumblr mutuals! I’m so happy someone so perfect like you can love someone as emotional and defective like ….me 💕 I love you ❤️

Crusher belongs to @jaytoons7

The Music Enforcers and the twins belong to @bluetorchsky

Pollo Miller belongs to @00lari00

[maskedtruths666]

Short story! This story is entirely fictional. Part 1.1

Summary: This story is about you (Damien) and your gf, Crystal. You are in NS and your gf is a physical trainer for new recruits in NS too. The moment you laid eyes on Crystal the very first time she trained you in NS, you knew you had to have her. Fast forward to your ORD, you managed to ask her out and she finally said yes. This was despite knowing how NS boys can be ever so lusting in NS especially when they’re locked up in Tekong throughout the week and their only source of R-rated materials is your gf’s tight body. It doesn’t change the fact that she loves to show off her body and secretly craves the attention that literally every new recruit in Tekong lusts for her.

As you got posted to your new unit, you knew that it was going to be a challenging time. Sure, you could book out every day and meet your girlfriend but it doesn’t help knowing that your gf will be in Tekong from Monday to Friday as she is taking a new batch of NS boys who just enlisted. It’s not like you had the free time to keep taking the ferry into Tekong just to meet your gf.

This is a story of how you found out that your gf is nothing but a cheap whore, desperate for attention and cock. And how you took out your frustrations on your own sister when you found out what a piece of street meat your gf is.

Crystal was taking her 5th batch of new NS recruits and as with every batch of recruits, she loves the attention they gave her and she knew exactly how almost everyone would lust for her. She would often tease them and allow them to follow her IG account so that they would all be jerking off to her the moment they could. She’d especially love teasing those she knew had girlfriends.

As one could imagine, Crystal always wore tight fitting athletic clothes to coach these boys. Despite her horny nature, she actually was very fit and could easily beat most, if not all NS boys in their IPPT.

Every day, Crystal would call you and FaceTime you after the day has ended. She could leave tekong and meet you but because she stays at one end of Singapore, she did not want to leave Tekong. The hassle was too much for her to bear.

The week passed by quickly and finally it was Friday where you could meet your gf and empty your balls into her. But it was also the end of hell week so Crystal wasn’t really in the mood. Sure, you managed to empty your balls into her but it was very half hearted and one sided.

“I’m sorry my love, I’m just not in the mood. You know how hell week is like. Training the boys and with the other trainers is very tiring. I promise I’ll make it up to you next week.” Crystal said as she hugged you to sleep.

You seemed to buy that explanation, having been through NS yourself. As you were sending her off back to camp on Sunday evening, a recruit walked up to you two and said, “Good afternoon ma’am. What a coincidence. You live around here?”

Crystal, mildly amused, replied, “Good afternoon Recruit Jeremy. Yes I do. And yourself?”

“I stay right there, ma’am.” Jeremy pointed to the exact same block that Crystal lived in.

“What a coincidence. Anyway, this is my boyfriend, Damien. He’s a few batches ahead of you and is a SGT.” Crystal replied.

“Ah good afternoon sir. You’re very lucky to have ma’am Crystal as your gf. She’s very fit.” Jeremy replied.

“Anyway, our grab is about 3 mins away. You wanna join us?” Crystal offered.

“That is very kind of you ma’am, but I’m driving there. Cancel your grab, I’ll drive you guys there.” Jeremy offered.

Without thinking, Crystal immediately cancelled the grab. Her jaw dropped when Jeremy brought his car around and it was a Rolls Royce.

It was an awkward ride because Jeremy insisted Crystal sit in the front and you being relegated to the backseat. It didn’t help that Crystal was mildly fawning over Jeremy. You being cucked to the backseat was like a tight slap in the face. You could not help but overthink about how Jeremy would be wanting a piece of Crystal’s pussy.

After you watched Crystal and Jeremy board the boat to Tekong, you immediately texted her your displeasure and to your annoyance, Crystal left you on last seen.

Throughout the night, you could not help but overthink and fantasize about how your gf was being used by Jeremy, even though you know that is impossible because PTs and NSFs aren’t allowed in the same area.

You texted and called and Crystal just kept ignoring your calls. She replied coldly, “Grow the fuck up and stop being a child. Talk to you at the end of the week.”

Not getting the attention and assurance you needed, you were helpless. Thoughts flooded your mind of how your gf was being gangbanged or used by the boys in camp. You were in desperate needed for a release and jerking off wouldn’t cut it.

The next day, you took MC because you couldn’t get out of bed as you were riddled by anxiety. At home, you saw your sister doing thirst trap pictures in the living room and you got an unexpected boner.

“Kor, come and help me take pictures for my IG can?” Amelia asked.

“Orh.” You replied and took her phone and started helping her take suggestive pictures.

Once done, she thanked you by giving you a hug and left to her room. The afternoon passed by and you saw her napping. Normally you wouldn’t be turned on because she’s your sister and you’ve seen her naked all your life. But something evil came over you when you logged into IG and saw your gf tagging Jeremy on her stories. Not one, but 4 stories. Only him but no one else. You snapped.

You walked into your sister’s room where she was napping and locked the door. You pulled off her shorts to reveal her well shaven pink pussy. As you stared right at it, your boner was instant. You spread her legs, gently fingering her pussy till it was moist. Amelia still didn’t wake up and actually moaned as you were fingering her.

“What a nasty xmm slut my sister is.” You thought to yourself.

As you positioned yourself to penetrate her, she woke up.

“Kor! Wtf you doing?” Amelia gasped in shock.

You immediately covered her mouth and whispered, “Keep quiet or I’ll hurt you.”

Fearing for her safety, she nodded tearfully. You spread open her legs and ate her out. Gasping in shock, Amelia could do nothing but cry. But after awhile, the pleasure from eating her out overcame her fear and she stopped crying.

When you’ve had your fill of eating her out, you thrusted into her without mercy. As your dick penetrated your sister’s tight and wet pussy, you groaned in pleasure. Your sister gasped in pain but soon the gasps turned to moans of pleasure. You totally ignored her initial cries of pleasure as you were so absorbed by the fantasy of guys gangbanging your gf in camp and these were horny guys, desperate to fuck your gf. With each thrust into your sister, you imagined each guy raping your own gf throughout the night. As you were raping your own sister for your own benefit, you grew an attachment to your sister. The more you thrusted and grunted, the more you loved it. The more you thrusted into her, the more you watched the stories of your gf posting about Jeremy in camp and the more wild you and rough you got. Soon, you were ramming your thick cock into your sister whilst choking her for maximum pleasure. At this point, Amelia was crying and begging you to stop. You were too deep and too far down to stop. You continue to rape her mercilessly and treating your own sister like a rape meat.

“Stop crying like you don’t want it. You’ve posted so many thirst trap pictures. You clearly want it. All girls are the same.” You grunted as you mercilessly plowed into her and ignored her cry for help.

As you were ramming your cock into her tight pussy, your pleasure was amplified. You were using an actual pussy to relief the tension you’re feeling instead of your own fleshlight. Soon, you were at your max and you gave her a few more hard thrusts before pulling out and blasting your hot load all over her face.

As your sister lay there breathless and still crying, you took a couple of pictures to remember this by. But at this point, you felt a bit of remorse so you apologized and helped her clean up and gave her $2000 to keep it under wraps.

Part 1.1 done. Next part is where you horny guys find out how much a slut Crystal is.

[pommedepersephone]

We finished reading Chitty Chitty Bang Bang today. The boychild's assessment?

"LOVELY! It was exciting. I loved that they defeated the gangsters! Can we read it again?"

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang is definitely an Ian Fleming book. It does not have the sex and violence of Bond, but the snappy writing, love of cars and gadgets and FOOD is all there. And while the avuncular tone (noted by many of his contemporaries both as praise and criticism) sometimes feels a little simplistic, it overall was a fun read.

An important point as a parent reading this to my kids was that the whole family was part of the adventure. Commander Caractacus Pott, his wife Mimsie Pott and their twins Jeremy and Jemima were all active participants. Mimsie is the least developed character, but I really appreciated that when the twins were kidnapped and plotting how to escape, they worked together and Jemima proved to be just as brave and smart as her brother.

Also, the original illustrations by John Burningham are quite fun.

NOTE: If you have seen the movie, be prepared that the screen version is a VERY loose adaptation. The screenplay was written by Roald Dahl and the director. Dahl also wrote the screenplay for You Only Live Twice, which likewise is a rather loose adaptation of the book by the same name. The musical was produced by Albert R. "Cubby" Broccoli, who had made five James Bond films to that point, and it does feature both

Desmond Llewelyn (Major Boothroyd "Q") as 'Bill' Coggins and Gert Fröbe (Goldfinger) as Baron Bomburst. That was a bit of fun for my kids.

Overall, our family recommends this book!

[kiss2012]

tsc thoughts under the cut cause i finished

i literally cannot wrap my thoughts around my overall opinion of it i feel like i absolutely need to reread it first

but also i need to reread tfc because I MISS TFC SO BAD ➡️ girl who reread it last may. i do think i spoke tsc into existence by doing this because i hadn’t looked at the trilogy since 2019 and then all of a sudden i decided to reread and found that unfortunately they still make me batshit crazy. what is in those books.

however i do like tfc better 🤷🏽‍♀️ so if i did reread tfc after this and read tsc again i would just want to read tfc again

this is not fair to say at all because tfc is a whole trilogy and this was only book 1. and i rlly need to start saying aftg instead of tfc cause it’s getting confusing because like i do think tsc is better than tfc (the first book). however i just…like aftg better? i feel like it’s more fun which is probably a weird thing to say considering it’s a lot More than tsc is. and obviously this book was more about jean’s recovery. but more happens in aftg. idk we’ll see tho

i do love jean and the trojans but i miss neil and the foxes every page. i feel like it’s harder to connect to the trojans because there r so many of them. and idk sports so the three coaches is probably normal for a team of this size i really wouldn’t know lol but i couldn’t keep the coaches straight in my head either

point is the foxes r my everything 4ever. i love jean jeremy cat and laila and i see what she was trying to do by introducing the floozy line (cute name) however i dont really have a strong feeling about them because we met them for like 5 minutes

i do love nabil tho why is he not part of the floozy line :(((((

i think cat and laila were absolutely perfect. they’re given a lot of depth especially cat and they’re so important to me. they’re better here than in fanon i think but i feel like fanon did get their personalities and relationship down mostly right. apart from cat not just being called alvarez LMAO bless neil only calling her that and fanon having no choice but to do the same because no one agreed on one single name. i remember sara was one that i saw a lot but i like catalina way way better i love cat <3 i love laila <3 their friendship with jeremy <3

an evening breeze rainbows open roads friends 😭😭😭😭😭😭

bi jean is so dear to me

also jean rooming with cat and laila (and then jean) literally perfect omg. no one ever put that in fics but i think it was the best thing to do. sorry for having to compare tsc to fanon im not trying to say one is better than the other at all but what you have to understand is how many fics about jean post tkm are out there and how many of them i read so my mind is going to go there. i wasn’t rlly obsessed with jerejean but i was (and am) a jerejean girl. and i had (have lmao) very high standards for fic so i stand by a lot of those fics WHILE still standing by everything tsc is

by which i mean i cannot get poc jean out of my head thanks to that one fic where he is moroccan. in that same fic jeremy was also spanish and i sort of adopted that into my image of them so i am trying to let go of it but i mean even the hatfords being pakistani still lives in my head despite how unlikely it is. and most of the time i pictured jeremy with golden hair (sometimes curls) so even though i think nora’s compromise being to have naturally brown-haired jeremy bleaching his hair is hilarious and iconic. sort of impossible for me not to picture him with golden hair.

however when jean was all startled and went “blond” when he saw jeremy’s hair. reader i died

english major jeremy is still a gift to me personally

kevin bargaining and arguing for his history major..my baby…the mentions of kevin and kevin’s actual appearances in tsc are everything. the postcards and magnets…kill me

every time neil showed up i lost my mind i love him SO MUCH!!!

see my problem is i wish the foxes showed up more even though it makes no sense for them to. i want kevin jeremy and jean in a room together. i will kill for jean and allison interaction especially if they talk about renee (yes i am holding onto renison still). i want jeremy and cat and matt and dan to hang out. i need laila to meet andrew. i need more renee I LOVE RENEE we did get a good amount of her though i think. she was everything.

genuinely think the way jean and renee was handled here was so perfect. i totally see the merit of it if they end the series together. i also see why jean might end the series without being with anyone romantically. but narratively i cant help but feel jerejean is what makes the most sense. the reason i liked them in the first place is their narrative appeal. and they were genuinely so good in this. so. idk. can’t think about that too much.

i have some problems with the writing like i did with the og series but um the thing is i cannot view these books objectively because they impacted me so much at a young age. i will say i wish tsc could have had a professional editor lol.

i also have some issues with the pacing tho because i did not expect it to end there at all? im so glad she started it where she did but when it ended i was like WAIT WHAT

i have a feeling the reason riko did what he did with the backliners is because he saw jean looking at kevin. could be wrong here but judging from how often jean talks about learning his lesson about looking at guys too long. well.

the main thing for me is that i don’t see how we’re going to get to championships in 2 books if this book only covered till the summer. you could argue exy games arent that important for jean’s story but i do think they are insanely important for jeremy’s story. and if he’s a pov character i want more about him!! that man is keeping his issues locked up (I NEED TO KNOW WHAT THEY R) but we can tell he loves exy and he needs to win his last year

my memory of the extra content is so dim and some of it i have voluntarily chosen to forget or just not consider plus i think some of it will/has changed. but i think i remember reading that trojans win for their last year and i Need that to happen. cause in my head it went: foxes win neil’s first year and trojans win neil’s second year and jeremy’s last year. idc for the rest i want neil to have won championships twice or at least once as captain so that’s what happens in my head.

like i need more about jeremy teaching jean to love exy again and more about jeremy’s apparently complicated family issues with exy???? jeremy let me in.

anywayy. this book feels like a fever dream and im going insane

[katherineholmes]

Many Caroline fans are always calling Elena a "bitch" for falling in love with Damon even though (according to them) Elena was aware of the sexual abuse Caroline suffered when she was under Damon's compulsion. However, I see virtually no Caroline fans complaining about how fucking selfish and cruel Caroline was to have sex with Klaus, even though he was responsible for making Elena's life a living hell. Not only did he kill Jenna in front of Elena, but he also tried to kill Jeremy, KILLED ELENA in the ritual, forced Isobel to kill herself in front of Elena for the sheer cruelty of doing so, and also made Tyler his slave and then killed Carol.

And in fact, Elena is ALSO another r@pe victim of Damon. I have nothing against Caroline, but her fans are extremely sexist and even misogynistic when it comes to Elena or even Bonnie.

Trigger Warning : Discussions of non-con, abuse.

Okay, first of all, hello, I got this ask such a long time back, and I'm really sorry about how long it has taken me answer it.

So, I wanna break this down before I answer this. All three of them - Bonnie, Caroline and Elena are victims of the vampires on the show. And pretty much everyone on the show has been wronged by someone or the other, even Klaus. All I'm trying to say is that the show itself pits a lot of victims, especially female victims, against each other. Mostly in order to prop up men, which is why I think that TVD is rooted in misogyny.

So I'm not going to blame either Caroline or Elena, but the message you sent is very compelling, and I want to dissect it a bit.

The 'Delena' of it

Let's get to the root of it - is Elena selfish for loving Damon? I recently saw a similar question on Reddit (two minutes of silence for the time I waste lurking on that site), and I honestly could not even read it, because of some of the takes I saw. But the root of it is this - Elena is traumatised teenager trying to hold on to every last person she has left.

I saw a meta about Elena having prolonged grief, and I agree, it feels as if her grief and her survivors guilt, is almost pathological. Within the show, she seeks one particular thing from her parter - immortality. Her entire family, with the exception of Jeremy, is dead. Of these she has seen her parents, Isobel and Jenna die in front of her. It is not only grief that she feels over these losses, it's also helpless, desperation, and a lot of trauma. In these situations, she essentially a person watching a train crash - on the sidelines, desperate to help them and save them, but helpless to do so.

Because of this trauma, she seeks to include people in her life that are immortal, and hard to kill. Be it Stefan, Damon, Caroline and Bonnie who's a powerful witch, as opposed to sending away Jeremy - someone who's mortal and can be hurt. She actively keeps an inner circle of supernatural beings around her because it's hard to lose them, and tries to distance the mortal ones - like Matt and April.

So it makes sense, that when she feels that she can't be with Stefan any longer, she is drawn towards Damon. Damon who takes the notion of death lightly, and plays with it, and has survived a lot. (A lot of this has to do with the sire bond, but we'll get into that some other day). But as it is, Elena feels safe with Damon because he is tough to kill, and it isn't selfish for anyone, let alone her, to seek security within a relationship. And to her, security is to not go through that grief or pain again.

Damon and his abuse of Caroline

Having said what I just did about Elena feeling secure with Damon, that's mainly according to her priorities and her specific trauma. Because yes, watching someone die, or being a spectator to trauma is also traumatic.

But, Damon isn't really safe, for anyone. Not even Elena. But he was particularly unsafe for Caroline. When we first see Damon meet Caroline, we see him charming her (because a seventeen year old girl is easy to charm), we see him flirting with her and going back to sleep with her. The scene then cuts to Damon biting Caroline and feeding on her - in the middle of sex. And she is traumatised, at which point he compels her and presumably this goes on. In the morning, she tries to run, he compels her again and then they go back out, behaving like a couple.

Now, the show runners themselves have never, ever acknowledged this as rape but it is rape. And we can see that, but Caroline never calls it rape - because she can't, and every time, Damon's abuse of Caroline is brought up, it is called abuse. It's said that Caroline is Damon's 'blood bag', she herself says that and calls herself his errand boy, but nobody ever calls it rape.

When Elena asks Stefan what Damon is doing to Caroline, he says that Damon is compelling her to feed on her. And we never see Elena and Caroline talking about it. So, in terms of the material that we have been presented with, we can conclude that Elena doesn't realise that Damon raped Caroline, because here's the thing, nobody on the show ever calls it rape. Not just in regards to Damon and Caroline, but in regards to Damon and Andy as well. Or Katherine and Stefan.

In a nutshell, TVD has a lot of consent issues, and straight up non-con, but it never addresses that, the narrative itself doesn't, and so we cannot hold a single character responsible for not seeing it. And if we can, then where is this energy when it comes to holding Stefan responsible for enabling Damon? Or Alaric - the grown man who hangs out with a rapist?

The 'Klaroline' of it

Klaus is the worst. He's a killer, he enjoys physically and psychologically torturing people, he literally enslaved his hybrids, then killed said hybrids just because they wanted to be free, killed his mother (who admittedly isn't mother of the year either), carted his siblings in boxes, and laughed when Finn expressed his trauma from being daggered for nine hundred years. Klaus is horrible, but he's arguably one of the best characters on the show, and is probably the best villain.

But he showers Caroline with affection. A lot of it, I think at least at the beginning, is love bombing. And while Caroline isn't amused by it, she is a little enamoured by it. She really is attracted to him, and doesn't like it. The thing is, Klaus is a lot like Damon, but he also cares about Caroline, and saves her life. Caroline is also traumatised, and has this belief that she'll never be anyones first priority - and I'll be absolutely clear on this, I'm not saying that Caroline isn't anyone's first priority, I'm saying that Caroline thinks so, and whether it's true or not isn't relevant to this particular conversation.

But Klaus at certain points, prioritises Caroline. And she's enamoured by this. When they fuck in the woods, he is only there for a day, and she wants to fulfil her desires, and maybe, get it out of her system, see what it's like. But, and I'm not sure of this, I haven't seen it discussed anywhere nor do I know Caroline's character enough to know if this is true, but I think sleeping with Klaus is Caroline's way of feeling in control.

Klaus is a lot worse than Damon, and she wants to feel in control with him, the kind of control she never had with Damon, as part of a trauma response. I'm not saying it's only a trauma response, but that part of it is. It's okay if anyone disagrees with this, or anything in this post, but this is my opinion. But, in either case, I'm not going to call it selfish.

There is a larger discussion here about what is selfishness, and it's always bad to be selfish, and whether or not a character being selfish should be a hindrance to liking them, but I digress. That's for another discussion.

Damon and his abuse of Elena

In episode 1x03 or 1x04 of TVD, Damon compels Elena to kiss him, but she's wearing vervain, so she doesn't get compelled. But honestly, Damon was so in love with Katherine, that he could've done anything to Elena simply because they look alike. In s2, he tries to break her hand, and physically abuses her, and throughout her relationship with Stefan and s3, he continually hits on her. In the end, she has no choice but to accept his behaviour.

In s4, he tricks her into blood sharing, and sleeps with her when she's sired to him. It's definitely sexual abuse, dub-con at best, but it isn't discussed because that clusterfuck of a plot point, the sire bond, is fucking weird. Elena is basically enslaved to Damon, like the hybrids are to Klaus, and no consent in this situation can ever be freely given.

So, I agree, Damon abuses Elena but it is never addressed, because the sire bond is presented, according to narrative, as a romantic thing.

In conclusion, a lot of TVD is rooted in misogyny, in fact the entire concept of 'who deserves Elena' is highly misogynistic because it treats Elena as an object to be coveted rather than a person. And so, it makes that quite a few fans are also misogynistic, but there's nothing we can do about it. Like I understand your frustration, and I'm right with you about Elena being hated for the most ridiculous reason, and I wish there was something we could do about it, but there isn't.

Thank you so much for sending this ask, it got me thinking about a lot of things, especially cause I'm neither a Klaroline nor a Delena shipper.

[scoonsalicious]

WE R SO CLOSE TO THE END!! POOKIE IM SO PROUD OF YOU!! DELIVERED AND FED US AS ALWAYS.🩷🩷

I. CANT. WAIT. FOR. THE. LIL. ANGST. REVELATION. TOTAL. BITCH. POCKET. AND. BUCKAROO. ON. HIS. KNEES.

Seriously Pocket and Bucky is SO CUTEEE!!🤍🤍🤍 BOTH OF THEM R SMITTEN FOR EACH OTHER😭

*giggling, kicking my feet, crying because in real life i am lonely*

GIVE US MORE FLUFFY SEXY POCKET X BUCKY TIME!!🫵🏻🫵🏻🫵🏻

Now let us discuss about cunthage. Pookie already hinted that she’s going after out beloved nerd and as i said before WE SHALL MANIFEST FOR TOTAL BITCH POCKET.

MANIFESTING TOTAL BITCH POCKET MANIFESTING TOTAL BITCH POCKET MANIFESTING TOTAL BITCH POCKET MANIFESTING TOTAL BITCH POCKET MANIFESTING TOTAL BITCH POCKET MANIFESTING TOTAL BITCH POCKET MANIFESTING TOTAL BITCH POCKET MANIFESTING TOTAL BITCH POCKET MANIFESTING TOTAL BITCH POCKET MANIFESTING TOTAL BITCH POCKET

Jeremiah saying she’s gunna die bcs if she didn’t take Winter Soldier back to HYDRA, they’ll unalive her. Also I think what Pocket said is true about cuntsy ‘like/attracted’ to Buckdoodle (I mean… who wouldn’t?😂) Somehow along the way, she connected with him, caught feelings and shit and ‘fantasising’ a relationship with him cus she’s that much of a cunt. The reason why she didn’t take him to HYDRA (*cough* during the Russia mission — man even I hate remembering/simply writing the Russia mission) is bcs he’s Bucky Barnes at the time and NOT the Soldat. And oh, also she’s enjoying the *cough* fuck ‘activity’. Fucking John IS OBSESSED.

Anywho……

IM JUST GOING TO STOP CRITICAL THINKING ABT WHAT HAPPENED IN RUSSIA AND WAIT FOR MOTHER POOKIE TO DELIVER THE FOOD AND I SHALL EAT IT WITH SUCH FEROCITY.

I want to know why it happened. Why Bucky made that choice (bcs i feel like the reason are still a bit unclear — like why do it again🤨 what is the purpose). I want a full depth of it. If I were Pocket, I *want* to see what happened (even if it killed me — better bleach my eyes). Oh and ofc, im not just gunna roast Jeremy… im roasting Buckwheat too before i forgive him.

*real footage of Pocket transitioningto a total bitch Pocket after the revelation*

Btw i read someone said Steve’s role? He has a role?!Let’s kill him. HE NEEDS TO BEGONE. GET OUT OF OUR LIFE. Steve and Jeremiah would be a great couple. (sarcasm intended). WHY STEVE? WHY CANT U JUST DUCK OFF. DONT TELL ME STEVE IS THE ONE WHO MADE THAT ‘NEWS’ (him and pocket false relation). OR THE ONE WHO LET CUNTHAGE TO GO TO THE RUSSIA MISSION. DONT FUCK W ME STEVE IM WARNING YOU. BACK THE FUCK OFF.

Also, I JUST remembered that Nat said Steve didn’t want Bucky to replace Dark Chocolate. I tell ya, HE’S FISHY. HE MUST HAVE A HIDDEN PLAN. HE DIDNT WANT BUCKY TO MEET POCKET, NOT BCS HE CARES FOR POCKET (okay, maybe he cares a little — bcs duh he *cough* loves likes her) but still he has his own agenda). HES PLANNING TO ‘CHARM’ POCKET. NAH. BACK OFF!!

Oh and rewinding back to chapter 26, that’s love right there. Pocket reassuring Bucky even when she didn’t trust him anymore, and Bucky ‘rejecting’ — pulling himself away — bcs it’ll kill him if she didn’t reciprocate his feelings. BTW THE KISS?!😫😫😫 *squealing like a child*. The way Bucky became owigoowie (man idk if this is even a word) when he said ‘present tense’. (🥹 — this is literally his facial expression at the time)

Alrighty, as usual, mother pookie, i love you and i wanna kiss you just like how Bucky kiss the life out of Pocket🩷🩷🩷 I didn’t say this much but thank u for everything. Thank you for writing. Thank you for sharing. Thank you for replying. I know I type a lot bcs I want to really express how im feeling, but it sometime is restricted/limited bcs im not a native english speaker😂 so my thoughts aren’t conveyed fully/correctly. (Also bcs i am just that dramatic and a yapper)

Please, take a great rest while you can. Hope you always in the pink. Again, I cant wait for the lil angsty, bitchy Pocket and revelation in chp 27. I am eagerly waiting for the showdown (*cough*, please, let there be a scene of Bucky punching Jonah and Stevuck). Thy meowsies love thou, mother pookie🫵🏻

PS// I KNOW I SAID I RUN OUT OF CAT SMOOCH GIFS BUT I CANT HELP MYSELF AND SEARCH FOR IT. THIS IS FROM GOOGLE😭

Since you gave me a photo of Elliot and Theo, I presented to you my unhinged (literally) cats, fat one is Hyde (Haida) and smaller one is Muezza (Moja).

OH! Out of topic…

RAGHHHH MALAYSIA MENTIONEDDDDD!!!🫵🏻🇲🇾🇲🇾🇲🇾KKAW KKAW

>>>and if there is a typo im sorry😂

Pookie, if you thought I fed you yesterday, I will GOURGE YOU TODAY! Eight mother fucking parts! Fuck. All the revelations in this chapter (well, most of them, anyway, lol).

Bucky and Pocket are just unable to not be together. It goes against their very DNA.

I have eleven fluff/smut post-series oneshots planned for the two of them, so we shall have happy times once the story is done. I can't quit them. They are my OTP (sorry, Buffy & Spike :( ).

Total Bitch Pocket has been unleased for Chapter 27! The snark is strong, and she is not afraid to unleash it, even if it has some negative consequences for her. She is using her greatest weapon at her disposal-- her dirty mouth, lol.

Jacoby is TOTALLY OBSESSED with Bucky-- it doesn't even matter what Hydra wants with him now. She wants him, and that's her prime objective. You will now be able to see what happened in Russia (Pocket, too!) and what happened to get him into that position. Ugh, I want to write so much more to you, but I am so dehydrated from this fucking migraine that my entire body hurts, so I can't type a lot without pain. Just know I love you, I love reading your comments. Your kittens are adorable and I want to give the squeezies.

xoxo You're the best!

[thedemiseofdj]

Random Ass Vampire Diaries Opinions/Ideas

Just because I can. I didn’t mean for this account to be so focused on vampires lmao. This is mainly about characters I have strong opinions on so I might not have as much to say about certain characters. I also haven’t seen every episode nor do I remember every episode I have seen so call me dumb if one of these takes or ideas is dumb

Elena Gilbert

Is it just me or was one of Elena’s most consistent character traits making people forget about trauma when she could easily just make it hurt less. Like she does it with Jeremy in season one and herself in season six. Vampires in this universe have been shown to be able to compel people to have heart attacks so it’s safe to say that they can make extreme emotional trauma just not hurt as bad

Piggybacking off of that a little, Elena should’ve been the one to stake Vicki in season one. It would’ve given her a reason to have Damon compel Jeremy to forget the whole thing and it would’ve added a whole new layer to her relationship with Matt

Elena should’ve been allowed to be a main villain when she turned her humanity off. I’m thinking she should’ve teamed up with Silas because in theory he could bring Jeremy back

Elena consistently defending/staying with Damon even as he continues to do horrible shit right under nose is very odd. Like at some point girl just stand up(I’m not anti-Elena, Damon or even Delena, it’s just weird that this girl with a strong moral compass wouldn’t just leave Damon)

Bonnie Bennett

Mistreated as shit

There were plenty of moments where she should’ve been able to get stronger on camera(this is just this bizarre idea that I have of Bonnie escaping the prison world by absorbing it like Kai absorbed the anti-magic spell)

They should’ve just let her and Damon at least hook up once if they weren’t going to date

Caroline Forbes

Were they trying to set up a possible Caroline/Alaric thing in season seven? Because that’s what it felt like and it was weird

Stefan Salvatore

Kind of a douche at times but otherwise I liked him

I swear to god, in the later seasons they just kind of forgot that Stefan was a ripper

Damon Salvatore

It was weird watching him constantly flip flop between edgy, murderous bad boy and Elena’s soft boy. Either his progression into a love interest should’ve been slower or, since he was a very evil guy for decades, just have a bunch of shit he did back then gradually come to light

Matt Donovan

I fully believe that the last time the writers had any clue what to do with Matt was the whole Mabekah plot line. I also think that Matt should’ve left with Rebekah

Matt’s whole “I hate vampires” thing didn’t make sense because he spent a whole summer between seasons traveling around the world doinkin’ Rebekah so it just comes out of complete left field

I think Vicki’s death should’ve affected him way more blatantly(again I haven’t seen every episode so I might be wrong).

Jeremy Gilbert

The whole Brotherhood of the Five thing could’ve worked if they did anything to establish the brotherhood as any different from regular hunters besides the magical tattoos. Like I know that Jeremy got super strong but outside of him lifting those kegs it doesn’t really come up. Especially since the other hunters relied so much on traps

Could’ve been a really interesting addition to the story if he were used properly. Me personally, I see Jeremy being used to showcase that Elena is willing to go to darker places if needed to protect the people she cares about

Other Random Thoughts

Season five was way too overcrowded with plots, it didn’t need three main villains. Get rid of Wes Maxfield and make Silas the main villain. The Travellers should’ve just been his cult of blood witches or something

Lilian Salvatore should’ve been the main antagonist of Season seven

A vampire turning their humanity off should’ve kept vestiges of the character’s personality.

I don’t think Vicki should’ve been a drug addict or if she was, it shouldn’t have been the reason she was such a volatile vampire. It should’ve been that being a vampire is hard and Vicki just couldn’t handle it

This isn’t everything that I have to say, but it’s something. I also want to clarify that I do in fact enjoy the Vampire Diaries, my brain just can’t help but nitpick things and think about how they could’ve been done differently. Let me know what y’all think or if I need to elaborate on some of this

[nervousladytraveler]

On Poldark tv series, the writer really diminished Ross' relationship with his kids. In the books he is an attentive loving father, but in the show he cared for GC but was almost indifferent to his children. Why? Why couldn't they have had some nice scenes of them talking or interacting on the farm or with the animals, at bedtime etc. They had time for GC and Val scenes. Seemed Dem was bringing them up herself. Didn't like how they portrayed him as a father. Your thoughts.

Thanks @anonymous for the ask! 

On the one hand, I’ve heard it is really hard to work with little kids (and animals) on sets, so I suppose giving the Poldark kiddies lines and significant action in scenes would be a stretch. I also heard the little fellow who played Jeremy in S2 was…well, he was a toddler, and probably acted like one, so he was a bit tricky to work with. And I also heard that Jeremy in S3 was a real sweetheart to work with, but had a really strong Welsh accent so they didn’t give him lines? (If any of this is not true please correct me. I can't refer to my sources because this was hearsay from like 5 years ago). So I understand those filming restraints. Also, the scenes we did have with Ross and his babies were super cute (I’m thinking of S3 and 4). But there were just so few! Ross holds Jeremy like twice in all of S2 so in S3 when he makes eye contact with Jeremy or holds his hand, we feel it is such a great development.

And yet there was much more screen time for Ross and wee Val (and earlier for GC) and it's the contrast that gets my goat. So to answer your question of why, my guess is the showrunners who really liked the Ross/Elizabeth story (and its aftermath) chose drama over domestic fluff, but that fluff is what we fans might prefer. 

Winston Graham wrote loads of little bits about the kids (also about the pets) that lent so much color to the story. These scenes gave the kids character, showed what kinds of parents Ross and Demelza were, and demonstrated that WG understood what it means to be a parent--kids don’t just fade conveniently to the background just because the adults are having big feelings. In the stocking (garters) scene in Warleggan, Jeremy is there, in the room, running around in a new hat while R & D are having their intimate moment! WG’s kids were flesh and blood, not window dressing. They get silly and tired and eat too many treats at Christmas parties. I love that on occasion, the kids start crying because Demelza is crying and that upsets them (Jeremy in Warleggan and Clowance in the Four Swans).

But back to the series…my personal favorite Jeremy and Clowance (actors) were from the second half of S4. They both had such charming tangles of curly hair and exuded so much joy in their surroundings. So if it appeared that Demelza was raising them herself, she at least seemed to be doing a good job.