Tumgik
#i kind of forgot what all this was like and I got a bit of a kick out of something my family was talking about when I wasn’t around
34saveme34 · 1 day
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FINALLY HERE!!!
Imperfect Integrity 3/5 for Ties AU (check out my fic tag to see the others if you didn't catch up yet!)
this is quite marware fic
some silly warnings: self harm, blood, emotional so fucking emotional, gay, there's gay sex mentions (NOT CLICKBAIT), 4 being an asshole
20k words, so far the longest thing I had ever written, if I keep this up, which I'll probably will, the Ties AU at the end might turn out to be like, 100k words overall or so but that's just an estimate
also as an aside, for the next part you will need to watch Meta runners to understand the stuff in it, otherwise it won't make sense. so if like you want to watch in like. Idk when I'll be able to write AND finish it but it'll probably take a while until I get there.
now when I don't feel exhausted, I'll start working on the Magical AU ep 1 and probably like try to remember worldbuilding stuff I forgot to write down like an idiot
anyways, enjoy!
It had been a while since Mr Puzzles was cleared of the dredged piece. It really cleared his mind, even more overtime. Although, with no money, he didn’t quite know what to do. As he walked around the city, trying to jog his mind, to give him something to work with, he spotted one of his rivals. Or well…. to him more of an ex rival. They locked eyes, Puzzles wasn’t sure how they were feeling. Staring at him with such a mysterious expression, veiled by maybe his still foggy mind or he just forgot how to understand people.
“Puzzles…?” he could hear them speak. Puzzles suddenly straightened himself up as he was caught off guard. Maybe he even stared, how embarrassing!
“Y-.. Yes! It is… I…” he chuckled awkwardly.
“You’re… not here to scheme again, are you?”
“Hm? Oh… I kind of stopped that. Especially with my old studio smashed to the ground” he might’ve sounded a bit too devastated, something he didn’t mean to be in front of someone like this, someone who knew what he was before way too well and felt it on their skin. Even if they never exactly fully met face to face, especially not in such a casual way as now.
“Yeah, I’ve heard about it! I didn’t want to believe it. I mean, someone like you, losing your… your…”
“My everything? Yes, indeed… Is that all you want?”
“Uhm… I don’t know. I never quite got close to talking to you. You were always so…intimidating”
“Yeah I- I’m sorry about that. I wasn’t quite myself, to say the least”
They looked at him shocked.
“You- You’re saying sorry? Huh… You really changed.”
“For the better I think” Puzzles smiled fondly, one man crossing his mind.
“Heh… Well, I’m sure. So, what will you do now?”
“Well, I kind of don’t have anywhere to go and I’m out of a job”
They didn’t reply for a while, seemingly thinking something over.
“Hey… c’mere, maybe I can offer you something good”
“Oh? Sure” Puzzles took a seat in front of them.
Only now did he fully get a good look at them. They were in a white sundress, had green eyes and gray long hair, let loose draping their face a bit, one of their eyes barely visible. He was kind of used to seeing them in suits and other formal clothing from pictures so it was an interesting change. He really needed that sort of casual vibe right now.
“So… You may have been a boss before but… what do you say to working for me? I know you’re qualified so we don’t even have to bother with that nonsense” they smiled. They were serious about their offer. If Puzzles still had a jaw, it would’ve dropped. He still clearly looked shocked though.
“What? You’re a great catch when it comes to this industry. It’s even YOU doing me a favour. And don’t worry, I’d pay you accordingly too, you can name your price”
“Well… I’d like it if it was fair to the others as well. I don’t want to be paid that much more compared to other workers”
“So a little bit more?”
“Sure but- what position do you have?”
“Oh just- whatever”
“...Whatever?”
“Whatever you can take when you come to it”
“So… An… Everchanging position?”
“Well… considering you’re really skilled in all fields of movie making, I feel I would stifle your potential if I forced you into a single position”
“You flatter me”
They laughed.
“You earned it, Mr Puzzles. Even though you were a vindictive… ahem asshole, it’s hard to deny that you always were an extremely talented person”
“Hm… heh” he chuckled “Well, sure, I’ll take it. Let’s just make it official at some point” Puzzles added almost awkwardly. The offer did find him pretty suddenly so he might have rushed into it. Then again, he didn’t see anything bad to it. Though it’ll definitely make headlines that he’s working for a rival of his. There will probably be rumors about it. He didn’t care though, since he would still get to do what he always loved doing.
Just as his now soon to be boss was handing him a business card, he heard wild yelling. Not just any yelling, it was his name being yelled. And it was rapidly getting closer. As he turned to the source of the noise, said source tackled him.
“Mario needs you!!” Mario yelled, as the source of the sudden noise as he was sort of straddling Puzzles with how he knocked him over.
“Uhm…?” his soon to be boss looked over at the 2 and thought for a bit. Then they laughed “Well, alright, here” they gave him their business card “Just call me when you’re not busy being tackled by men” they winked then left. 
Puzzles felt a little hot as he got up, then ripped Mario off of himself as well, considering how he was latched onto him. Puzzles, being tackled by men? No! That never happened before. Mario tackling him down was an exception. And it didn’t mean anything more than that. He just… needed him for whatever reason.
“Mario needs you!!!” Mario repeated himself, looking up at Puzzles with his big blue eyes. God, maybe he will do whatever he wants! Who said that.
“What do you need me for?” he sighed, giving in, asking him as he crouched down to his level. 
“For research. For SMG1 and SMG2”
“Uhuuuh. And why exactly?”
“Our link.” Mario said as if Puzzles was already well versed in Cosmology lore.
“Our what now?”
“The thing I did for you to not die. Though it was on accident… Mario will do lotta accidents but he didn’t think he could do such a big one!”
Mario almost looked proud of himself.
“Hm… Well” Puzzles smiled at Mario, with such a disgustingly sweet smile, it couldn’t be more genuine “I’m glad you did, you really saved me. I would still be lost if it wasn’t for you”
Mario seemed to be lost looking at Puzzles’s screen. Almost as if he froze. It took a good few seconds for him to respond.
“S… So!! Mario needs you!! Right now!!” Mario picked up Puzzles and started running with him at a speed Puzzles didn’t think was possible for the avatar to achieve. He… truly had some wonderful tricks up his sleeves. And didn’t it just make him more endearing? Who said that. 
Mario ran with him to 1 and 2’s place, not stopping even for a moment before getting there. Almost like he was doing everything in himself to focus only on going and nothing else around him. 
They arrived and Mario quickly dropped Puzzles down once he entered 1 and 2’s home.
“There you 2 are!” 2 cheered.
“So, we can start, yes?” 1 chimed in too.
“What will this be for anyways?” Puzzles asked, still sort of confused with the situation.
“You see, Mr Puzzles, what you have with Mario is really special.”
Puzzles tried very hard to not interpret that in a different way than it was meant to. No way anyways! Mario was not his type. He wasn’t even sure if he would even like anyone though. He never really had people like that in his life. At all honestly.
“Special how exactly?”
“Well… uh, exposition time I guess! 2, get the exposition powerpoint!” 
2 brought out a projector, 1 pulled down a white projector background out of nowhere. Puzzles was a little impressed by how well the meme guardians were prepared for this kind of thing. Kind of made him think about the ways he thought of handling stuff before he went really crazy… Good times.
“So you see, I, SMG1, as well as SMG2, we are meme guardians, and also partners. As in cosmically linked. You see, this was something that was inherent to us since we started existing.”
2 flipped to an image of the 2, with their hands linked, in the process of transmuting a meme.
“Started existing? Cosmically linked?” Puzzles was trying to keep up.
“Yes, we are ageless in a sense. Maybe… Immortal is more correct? And yes, cosmically linked. Sort of like being soulmates. It’s so we can share our power and make each other stronger as well. While we can work on our own as well, working together almost always brings better results. Like what you see on the slide, this is us transmuting memes! The same is true for SMG3 and SMG4 as well. Now… You 2”
he sighed.
“I… I don’t really know to be fair” he admitted.
Silence filled the room. Puzzles was thinking how to react.
‘“Well uh… that’s why I’m here, right? So you can figure it out” Puzzles tried to be optimistic for 1 and 2.
“Right!” 2 chimed in. 1 was starting to feel better about it now.
“Yeah, I guess so”
“Should I bring the memes, 1?”
“Just what I was thinking! Almost like you read my mind”
2 giggled before leaving to get the memes.
“What do you need the memes for?” Puzzles asked.
“You see… I was wondering if your weirdly created link can also manipulate memes or not. Considering Mario is literally the avatar of this world- Oh yeah, Mario being the avatar means if he gets killed the whole world goes to ruin. He’s like the heart of this universe. Oh yeah, we come from a different universe, it’s just since we… lost our avatar, it went to ruin, it became uninhabitable. Dwelling on the past so much is no good though ahah.”
Puzzles was just nodding along.
“Say uh… I’ve been thinking… I remember when SMG3 and SMG4 mended their severed ties… although in a pretty dreamlike way, considering I wasn’t fully there but- they had their literal physical ties well- located differently”
“Physical ties?” 1 looked at him curiously “Why didn’t they mention this to me or 2” Puzzles could almost imagine the kind of talking to 3 and 4 will get about this… Ah, well, not his problem.
2 came back with the memes.
“I was just mentioning it” Puzzles started again, slowly to make sure he had 1’s attention again “Because their ties were on their hands, while with Mario, he does have it on his hands, I actually have it right by my collarbone”
“Oooh, the same place Mario grabbed with all his will to make sure you don’t die!” Mario added with a cheery tone, as if it wasn’t traumatic at all.
“E-... Ah, exactly, Mario” Puzzles sighed.
“Hm” 1 immediately grabbed a few notes to scribble on “I wonder if their locations being different could affect anything in this… even the fact that neither of you are meme guardians!”
he still seemed to be a bit frustrated with this whole thing. Puzzles kind of felt bad.
“It’s my fault, I’m sorry” he spoke quietly but everyone looked at him. 1 panicked a bit.
“Oh no no no, I’m so glad to know this is actually possible! I’ve never seen anything like this! I’m just frustrated because it’s hard to figure out!” 
Puzzles showed a weak smile.
“Besides, it’s also Mario’s fault” Mario chimed in as he stood closer to Puzzles, as if he was trying to comfort him.
They got to a few tests after finally everyone was okay. They came to a few conclusions: The power of the link can be measured physically, however it is more chaotic than the average guardian link, thus it is more unstable. It cannot affect memes, however it has the potential to be more powerful than that. Though that was just a theory from 1 based on how it managed to save Puzzles from going back. However he did note the shared pain being so intense must have something to do with it. 
As they were leaving, Mario didn’t seem to leave his side.
“What?” Puzzles looked at him.
Mario seemed to struggle before finally spitting out something that had been on his rather empty, echoey mind of his. 
“Mario was thinking if you want to live with him!! Considering that he knows you don’t have anywhere else to go right now!!” 
Puzzles was taken aback. He chuckled, his face feeling a bit hot, hot enough that Mario noticed.
“Heh, uhm well, didn’t know you took such a liking to me, Mario” it almost felt like Puzzles was teasing Mario, even though it wasn’t his intention at all. He just wanted to stop feeling like a shaking leaf over kindness.
More concerning, Mario seemed to stop, again, that frozen face of his. Puzzles was scared he hurt him, immediately trying to make it right.
“I mean! That you feel sorry enough for me! I mean uhm, you must not be inviting just any homeless person to live with you!” if he could sweat right now…
Mario slowly regained the composure he seemingly lost.
“Hey now, I do like you a little bit” Mario said cheerfully as he went to lead the way to his and Luigi’s house.
Likes him a little bit? Oh those words were like flints trying to spark something and slowly causing a fire inside his head, making him even more stupid about this whole situation… Oh, it must be the link! There wasn’t anything weird to be explained here, he was just feeling this way because of their link and nothing else. Especially since it happened so recently too! Who knows, it could be actively lying to him about his feelings!
They went inside the house, Luigi greeted him. 
“Mario did say you had nowhere else to go so I agreed that you could live here until you figure something out!” 
“Thank you, it really does mean a lot to me, more than anything” Puzzles sounded so awfully grateful practically on his knees but that could’ve been because he was so god damn tall, it had both brothers ever so lightly flustered. Just a tiny bit but enough to where Puzzles was starting to notice it.
“Oh, of course! It’s the best we can do, it really isn’t much!” Luigi was the more awkward one while Mario just laughed then stared in front of himself. It was almost like he was asserting dominance with just his gaze. Puzzles once again felt awkward.
“Oh, did I mess up… This social interacting thing really isn’t my strong suit right now-”
“Oh, you’re fine, really! Just never had someone so grateful for hospitality is all” Luigi finally sounded fine again “Besides, you can always really thank us by helping around. Mario is like a tornado of messes anyways and I wouldn’t mind help with that”
“Hey! I’m not that bad” Mario defended himself.
“Heh, what, bro? You want to look good in front of your new friend?”
Friend.
Friend.
Friend.
Friend
Oh, it rang so many times in Puzzles’s head. It should have settled in at this point but hearing it like this what did it. Sometimes he still thought he was living in that total loneliness he used to be in before. He smiled. He smiled so much, if he could he would’ve cried.
“I’m your friend?” he sounded like he was genuinely crying.
The 2 brothers looked at him.
“Of course! You’re our friend!”
“Mario thinks you’re pretty cool”
He grabbed both in a tight hug before setting them down again and leaving immediately to a different room. He didn’t even know the layout but he sure was going. At least he was exploring on his own! Oh, he was feeling like a dumbass then. He seemed to stop in what was possibly Mario’s room, considering how messy it looked. But it did smell like him so it was definitely his room. His smell had such a comforting effect on Puzzles, probably due to the fact that the link they newly formed was having undeniably strange effects on him that can’t be attributed to anything else. Nothing else at all. Besides he could NEVER be into fat italians. Just a combo he always found unappealing. So why would he EVER find that type of man interesting or worth his time now? Not even character development could ever do that to him! Just a forceful cosmic link that makes you believe untrue and super false things!
Mario opened the door to see Puzzles on his bed. It was kind of silly, considering he was not even close to being able to fit on the bed. He was just way too tall and lanky to fit on there right. It made Mario chuckle which made Puzzles notice him. They stared at each other for a bit, before Puzzles got up.
“I got in your bed- that wasn’t my intention”
“Mhmmm… It also doesn’t seem big enough for you…”
“Huh? Yea I- How did I not realise that” Puzzles laughed awkwardly as he decided to just plop down on the ground instead.
“It’s okay, Mario understands. Puzzles man only recently became normal”
Puzzles nodded, not knowing what else he could add to this. He didn’t want to run his mouth and say something stupid again. Was he always this much of an idiot? He could barely remember at this point.
Mario could easily notice the frown forming on Puzzles’s screen, which only served to concern him. He sat beside him.
“You good?” 
“Oh I… Well, would you really want to listen? I think it’s just a bunch of nonsense but-”
“Yes, Mario will hear you out. You think he doesn’t think about a bunch of nonsense? You underestimate him”
Puzzles chuckled.
“Well alright… I’m just feeling really stressed… about life in general I think. Since it moved on without me- I can’t exactly resume from where I left off. And my head feels weird in general. Sometimes just… feeling like doing things without thinking or something…”
“HmmmMMmmMMMMMmMM” Mario made loud thinking noises.
“Oh? Do you have an idea on what it could be?”
“No…. although….”
“Although?”
“SMG4 noted before that I acted pretty weird lately”
“Oh huh?”
“In his words ‘Why did you just suggest something good to my videos that wasn’t a meme?’ “
Well this puzzled the Puzzle. 
“What did you suggest?”
“Don’t remember” Mario looked aside for a moment then he seemed to become rather content about himself.
“This is weird… We should talk about it with SMG4 sometime…”
“Mmmm… wait!!” Mario suddenly got up and ran to a calendar “We’ll have vacation soon!!”
“V… Vacation?”
“Yeah! SMG4 said we all deserve one good break!!”
“Huh! So um… I won’t see you for a bit?”
“No way!”
Mario furrowed his brows before he grabbed his phone and went outside. Was interesting seeing Mario act this way… not just stubborn but so… He didn’t even know how to put it into words.
As he sat there, beside Mario’s bed, his mind started to wander, listening to the silence better and the noises hidden in it… The analogue clock that was hung on the wall dominated it although he could hear other things. Like the wind outside. Steps sounding across the halls outside. Even the light hum of his screen finding him. It was rather peaceful, it let him think. He still needed to think about a lot. Or maybe just not think at all. The idea seemed rather attractive. Even though he now cringed as he remembered how tightly he hugged the 2 brothers before running off like a mindless idiot. Good thing Mario didn’t seem to question it. Maybe he should look at things in a similar way! Do first, question why later. Or never, preferably. What could possibly go wrong?
As he was deep in his thoughts, what stirred him from his daydreaming was yelling outside. He now knew it to be Mario, it was rather well… fitting to him. No one else could yell the same way as Mario does. What an odd thing to note for Puzzles…He chose not to think about it though. Just appreciate Mario’s unique nature without further thought. 
A few minutes later, Mario came back with a big smile on his face.
“Mario convinced SMG4 to let you come with us!!” he cheered, hugging Puzzles.
The affection still felt weird, he was still battling feelings. He was sort of relieved when Mario let go of him but he still wished it back so dearly. It was probably one of those things where he couldn’t turn off his brain no matter how much he wanted to.
“You should keep hugs to a minimum, Mario” he commented.
“Awww, you don’t like hugs?” he sounded a bit sad “Really funny how you hugged us so tight before… Mario don’t get it” he looked genuinely stumped.
“I don’t know! I do but I don’t. Just- Just keep them short… please?”
“Okie-dokie!!” Mario smiled “Hmmm… what should you pack for vacation….”
“I kind of don’t have anything” he laughed awkwardly.
“Uhuh… Not even a phone?”
“Nope”
“MmmmMMMMMMMMmmmmMMMMmmmmmm damn”
“Am I not enough by myself”
“I’m gonna ask Luigi if we can get you stuff, can’t just let you come with us with zero planning. That could generate issues we could combat right now instead of leaving it for later”
Mario left. His tone was different from usual. This man was LEADING and with GRACE at that. Puzzles felt starstruck. What the fuck? Sure, Mario had his moments acting a bit outside of who he is but this was so much more. He talked like… Like how he would. Eh, it’s probably nothing!
Luigi got dragged into the room.
“Mario brought Luigi here for you”
“Sorry” Puzzles already felt the apology escaping him. He didn’t think much about it right now afterall. He didn’t think anything. He definitely wasn’t thinking. Why would he be thinking right now? Don’t be silly! He was definitely not thinking and thinking till the end of the Earth! Only the old Puzzles would think about how much of a burden he felt like as soon as he was himself again. The new Puzzles would definitely not feel like he was worth nothing or even less, or that he didn’t deserve to be forgiven even if he was kind of brainwashed.
He was definitely not thinking about any of that. He would never. End of it.
“Hey, it’s okay!” Luigi tried to reassure Puzzles “You do need some things. I heard we’re going to the nearby beach so you need at least some kind of beach clothes. Can…. Can you even go in water?”
“Everything except my head”
“Then yeah! We need swimwear for you. And we need to go shopping anyways!”
“Are you sure?” Puzzles still tried to be nice but was trying to hide so hard that he wasn’t feeling okay mentally.
“Of course! We need spaghetti for Mario anyways so I wanted to go shopping! And maybe… I know where we could get you swimwear”
“Alright” Puzzles got up, hitting his head “Sorry, I’m so tall”
Luigi giggled.
“Well, sadly that’s one thing we can’t fix”
“I think I’ll get used to it”
“Hmm…” Mario thought out loud “Maybe you can squish the spiders up there for Mario”
“Sure thing, Mario” Puzzles smiled at him before turning away, not entertaining anything in himself. Such a stupid idea to overthink such a simple thing anyways. It did freeze Mario though, especially because of the way Puzzles would say his name. Maybe he was a little unwell about Puzzles. Even Luigi noticed the tension between the 2 but decided to brush it off.
“C’mon, guys! We gotta finish while it’s still bright outside!” He left the room, the other 2 soon followed. 
Mario was oddly quiet during the shopping trip until they went to a shop that seemed to be holding just- an abhorrent amount of swimwear of all sorts. Even styles Puzzles never saw before. He was a bit overwhelmed by the selection, although less and less as he reminded himself that about 90% of the stuff sold here won’t fit him considering how god damn tall he was. They went inside, looking around. The shopkeeper, a rather old lady, came out and immediately led the 3 men to the taller section. Now there Puzzles had the chance of finding something good!
They looked around, Puzzles started to feel rather picky. He didn’t know exactly what to go for. 
“Stumped?” Luigi looked up at Puzzles as he seemed to be struggling.
“I don’t know what I exactly want”
“Aren’t bikinis hot right now?” Mario chimed in “Mario was also thinking about getting some”
Puzzles flushed red.
“Me? Showing skin? Don’t be ridiculous!” Puzzles seemed rather defensive. And utterly embarrassed. 
“Mario! Don’t just say things without thinking!” 
“But I’m Mario” 
“You embarrassed him!”
The 2 brothers went onto arguing about boundaries while Puzzles searched further. In the end he found one of those one piece swimsuits that reach from elbow to knee and seemed satisfied with that. It was probably his best choice. Luigi bought it for him. After that they also got him some clothes so he could change later. Once again something that was hard to find at first but since their wonderful world was very diverse even without Puzzles’s amazing lankiness, they found clothes that fit him.
“I’ll pay it back though!” Puzzles said “Write it up somewhere and I’ll totally have it covered as soon as I start working again!”
“Okay okay!” Luigi tried to calm Puzzles down “This won’t drive me broke! If buying Mario a yacht’s worth of spaghetti each month doesn’t then nothing will”
“Oh that sounds like soooo much spaghetti” Mario salivated at the thought.
“Don’t entertain that idea!”
Puzzles laughed at the two.
“Alright but still write it down somewhere. I don’t want to use you too much”
Luigi nodded.
They got home. Luigi went to unload all the groceries while Puzzles got dragged to Mario’s room by Mario himself. He seemed to be going toddler tantrum mode by how tired the day had gotten him or maybe he was just upset he wouldn’t get a yacht’s worth of spaghetti. Even then, his grip on Puzzles was stronger than what should have been possible. 
Mario laid Puzzles down with ease and laid beside him with not much afterthought. He fell asleep fast and even then clung onto Puzzles pretty strongly. He could not escape. 
He couldn’t help it, he let his mind race. He didn’t know how he exactly felt about Mario but he really might make him act up at this rate and he wasn’t kidding. He was being so cute through all of this and at the swimwear shop what kind of sounded like flirting. It definitely wasn’t though! He doubted that Mario would pull out actual flirting just like that. Nobody ever made him feel this way and it was super infuriating for him.
He kind of ended up riling himself up as he angrily stared at Mario. That anger slowly slipped away. He couldn’t stay mad at him. He hadn’t known him for that long anyways, he could always just be feeling this way because experiences in general felt new to him. He just- won’t fully entertain this crazy shit right now but try his best to give himself space to process his feelings. Even if it might throw off the people around him. Even if it could cause him to be a  burden… He stopped at that. He also didn’t want to feel like dead weight around the crew. Especially as he imagined how god awfully awkward he’ll feel around everyone when they go on that vacation. This was gonna be really hard on him, even if he realised he needed space for his big feelings. He yawned. He felt tired too. He pulled the blanket off of the bed and tried his best to cover himself and Mario as well. Kind of weird, but they managed to fall asleep on the floor together. 
The 2 slept soundly together, as they tangled up more while sleeping. Considering how neither was a light sleeper, Luigi had an interesting sight to greet him when he went to Mario to tell him that breakfast was ready.
He giggled at the sight and even took a picture. That’ll be something he can tease Mario about later. He left the room quietly with an evil grin plastered on his face.
It took a while until Mario stirred. Even he was surprised that he was held so closely by Puzzles. And just how warm he was. And wasn’t nearly as hard as he thought he would be, considering his body was made of wires and cables. He actually felt really comfortable. Maybe a bit too comfortable. He still couldn’t quite understand what was going on in his brain. He just let the thoughts run across him as if his mind was a waterfall and these thoughts were feeble, unfit fish that are defenseless against the power of a waterfall. Just like how his thoughts were defenseless at Mario’s mind becoming so empty they become nothing as well. Though that just left him confused. He didn’t know if this was okay but hey! It was probably nothing. It’ll just solve itself in some roundabout way like how things usually just go off in a chain reaction around him. He was sort of used to things happening to him and around him. Just like when his Mighty Italian suffered at the merciless door’s slammige. Although he was panicked, things happening around him kind of solved it. Just like how a good but silly plot demands it. This time should be no different. Since there was a good and engaging start to this and it had slowly been ramping up, it should reach a satisfying conclusion. It was only fair, to make a story that could leave a mark on people… What… What were these thoughts? Even Mario himself was stumped at his thoughts. Maybe it was because he just woke up but he wasn’t exactly the type to have discussions like this inside his head for fun. He preferred his mind to have as much of a reverb as St. Stephen’s Basilica no less and with the most disgustingly awful sound system set up, so bad any words spoken are drenched in noise, losing clarity. Honestly, maybe even more. Make his mind as echoey as a hollow Earth would be and record it with an xbox type headset.
He looked up to Puzzles, discarding his thoughts as he observed Puzzles’s softly humming screen engulfed in static. It was rather mesmerising. He squirmed until he freed his hands and reached up to feel his screen. Even his screen was sort of warm, although harder than his body, there was still something startlingly alive about it. He became a little obsessed with it. And it seemed Puzzles chose the worst possible time to wake up.
Mario hesitantly pulled away his hands from Puzzles’s screen. 
“Hmmm?” Puzzles didn’t speak yet, just humming softly as he woke up.
“Good morning, TV man” Mario defaulted to being sort of polite. It seemed he couldn’t fully discard those thoughts now! Unfortunate. Suffer my gay wrath, Mario.
“Morning, Mario…” he yawned “How’d you sleep”
“Pretty good… you’re comfy” he giggled as he cuddled closer to Puzzles. To his dismay. Puzzles sat up. He whined. Puzzles pulled Mario off of him. 
“Physical affection time is over now” Puzzles said, rather dryly. 
Mario looked at him, with waves of sadness, waves that washed away in his blue eyes that got so big, pleading, looking at Puzzles just to give him one more second of physical closeness. Puzzles strongly averted his gaze. Although now he won’t be able to get those puppy eyes out of his mind. 
He stood up, this time more careful to not hit his head in the ceiling. 
Mario decided to brush it off. Though, once again, he couldn’t quite discard it all until he thought about breakfast.
“Oh, Mario’s gonna have breakfast” and there he went.
Puzzles sighed. Even yesterday, Mario got to him quite a lot but he didn’t have the heart to push him away. Especially not after what he ended up thinking about after Mario fell asleep. Although, based on how it all went down, it might not be the last time that Mario would fall asleep latched onto him. And he was a bit worried about the fact that it didn’t bother him. Though maybe it was better for him to get used to it. He knew he had to make some odd sacrifices to make his life work again. Or more like start working for the first time ever. 
He left to see Mario destroying breakfast. It was as if they made mukbang but violent. He already saw what Luigi meant by Mario being something to deal with. Luigi looked at him, they shared a look. He sat down with the brothers to eat with them. Although he didn’t need a lot to sustain himself, he still needed a bit. And as he did, the 2 brothers looked at him. Puzzles felt embarrassed.
“What?” he already tried to defend himself “can’t a man have his breakfast?”
“TV eats…. pretty cool” Mario was maybe a bit too joyful about Puzzles being able to eat.
“I just didn’t think about it before but it makes sense! Sorry if we caused you to feel bad”
Puzzles sighed.
“Thank you, apology accepted… I just don’t want to be seen as a freak is all…”
“Of course, it’s understandable”
“Mario will fight the haters for you” and he sounded serious about it too.
Puzzles was clearly flattered, maybe a bit flustered. Luigi looked between the 2. Puzzles looked at him. Luigi gave him a look that could only be described as having the vibe of ‘Idk what’s going on with you 2 but I’m not gonna get tangled in your problem’. Puzzles felt defeated.
“Say… When exactly is the vacation?” Puzzles changed the subject.
“This weekend”
“Oh huh! 2 more days then… At least I have time to attend to… actually getting a job”
“TV already getting a new job?”
“Yes, Mario” he said “Actually you interrupted me in the middle of it when I was asked to join my ex rival’s studio. Which is why I would’ve needed the- Wait we actually really did forget about getting me a phone” Puzzles stared off “How will I call them now?”
“You can use our land line!” 
“Oh, thank you! Maybe next time we go we can actually get me one”
“Sure thing, Puzzles! Let's hope we don’t forget next time”
“Yeah”
He got up and left, forcing the conversation to end. Mario watched him closely then stared at where he saw Puzzles leave.
Luigi took his phone out with the picture he took of the 2.
Mario noticed the motion under his face, looking down. He took a bit as he realised what he was looking at. He slowly flushed red. Luigi grinned at the reaction.
“I see you slept well” he teased Mario.
Mario couldn’t react as he turned away from Luigi, trying to hide his face. His ears being so red were giving away his thoughts though.
“Oh, dear god, you’re THAT smitten” Luigi laughed, now feeling a bit bad. Mario would usually try to throw hands at this point.
He looked back at him with the most genuine shock in his eyes.
“Smitten??!” he said with so much disbelief, he genuinely didn’t think about it that way.
Luigi stared at him.
“You didn’t think about that at all?”
“No!!! Mario is too stupid for stuff like that!” he seemed rather panicked now.
“Oh, bro” Luigi now just fully felt bad, as he wrapped an arm around his brother, trying to comfort him “I get that it can be hard to deal with these feelings-”
“Mario thought he could only love spaghetti” he started sobbing. Luigi looked unamused.
“...Just know I’m here to listen if you wanna talk about it, okay?” 
Mario nodded then hugged him. Good grief, he didn’t think he would need this so suddenly, just like this. He didn’t even know he could develop feelings in such an embarrassing way. He wasn’t the cool and easygoing Mario anymore, he was stupid and scared now. Sure, he could be scared but it wasn't exactly usual for him to feel this anxious. Not even Peach could make him feel that way while she was around and he still sort of liked her. He never felt like he’s fumbling a bad bitch or something, especially because that fumbling was part of their relationship in a way. However here he felt so much more, being scared he couldn’t be enough for the man he happened to fall for a little bit. Maybe it’ll just pass! That was an on and off thing with a certain someone who wasn’t Peach. And he even grew pretty casual about it too! But this… Mario was fucked. As in utterly, deeply and strongly fucked.
He sighed which drew attention from his brother.
“Mario thinks it’ll pass. Just very intense right now. Way too intense” by the end it sounded like he was whining. 
Luigi chuckled and patted his back.
“If that makes it easier to sleep at night”
Puzzles took a while, it felt like time stopped. But he came back afterall. Why did Mario feel he was gone forever? He wouldn’t leave… would he? When… When he is able to make good money he probably will.
Mario stayed oddly quiet while Luigi and Puzzles were discussing something entirely unimportant to him. It was all just noise. His head never felt so full, it felt suffocating. Uncomfortably so. So many things he had been through yet this broke him in a way he didn’t know could happen to him. He quietly got up and got himself more spaghetti to occupy himself with something. Luigi didn’t say a thing, just glanced at him. Puzzles was none the wiser about the fact that Mario wasn’t just having seconds, he was actively coping with eating. 
The day passed by. Puzzles had the job now, he would start as soon as he got back from the vacation they so suddenly invited him to. More like Mario invited him. From what little he could guess from what he saw and heard, SMG4 really didn’t like him. Not that he had a problem with that, he had every right to. He just knew it could easily make things awkward. Especially because he didn’t know what to expect. Hell, what if he ruins the whole outing? Just making it awful for everyone around…. It truly scared him. In these times, he was weirdly glad he had Mario sometimes latching onto him in his koala kind of manner. Though he did draw the line at his screen being used to watch stuff. Sure, he had so much love for television himself and all- but that was his face! And his face is there to be a face, not to just be your usual household equipment. Mario did try every so often though until he seemed to reach a breaking point with it. He was REALLY bored but he also didn’t want to bother Puzzles into… maybe even hating him. The thought sent a chill down his spine.
Mario was struggling, oscillating between being beside Puzzles or not. He finally put his foot down, abruptly leaving. Puzzles was sure puzzled by this. Staring a hole into the door, as if the door did something to him. He realised what he was doing was dumb as hell as he pushed himself up from the floor and left the room. No one was inside so he left the house to look around. He found Luigi tending to their garden in the back. It was small but really pristine and well-kept. He did know it was a passion of his so it didn’t surprise him but he thought it would be bigger.
“Anything wrong?” he must have stared because this was a question he got from Luigi.
“Oh no, not really! I was just- looking around is all. And it felt a little lonely inside.” 
Luigi hummed.
“If you want to know, Mario left to SMG4”
“Ah! I see! Not… Not that I asked it but thank you”
“Sure” Luigi said with sarcasm which Puzzles did not pick up on at all.
For a while he didn’t do much until he had quite the grand idea. He looked around the house on his own, searching for stuff to aid his idea. On his quest for a pen or pencil and paper, he found personal stuff which he didn’t mean to. Like pictures and notes about adventures they both had. He sighed, happy that they both had such an eventful life, but also feeling jealous for the very same reason. He wished that were him. He shook his head, though he couldn’t help but wonder about all those adventures as they slowly seeped into his idea, tainting it so so sweetly. And it showed. His idea wasn’t only his anymore. But he did like it. 
He started to sketch out concept shots for it as well, full of drama and plans for all sorts of lighting, camera angles, scenery, the practical effects, even ending up pondering about the sound effects, the kind of music he’d use. It’s almost like his love for filmmaking never left him.
By the time Mario got back from an adventure with SMG4 which he induced by causing problems, as he tends to from time to time, he found his room covered in a lot of doodles, with Puzzles being in the middle of it. He looked like he was consumed by it but didn’t seem bothered by it. Grinning happily and without care in his metaphorical black hole of passion. Mario found the smile rather contagious. He couldn’t help but stare at everything, taking in so much detail. Usually his head would explode over such actions, especially because there were words he had to read, or refuse to take in information but today seemed different. He took it with open arms, just like the man in the middle of this beautiful mess.
Their eyes met, shared a few moments of eye contact. The realness of it all, it was sickening and weird. Mario wished some really bad things while being so deeply enamored. Made him wish he never existed. 
Puzzles on the other hand was more confused although flustered. He didn’t think about it too much before but Mario’s opinion on him might have mattered more to him than he let on.
The stare off ended as Puzzles awkwardly spoke up.
“Uhh- hey, Mario! Are you interested in my work?”
Mario took a bit.
“Mario doesn’t know what you’re making but it looks cool”
“Oh they are just plans for scenes I was thinking about! You see, my plans are always all over the place but they always come together in the end!”
“Hmmmmmm….” Mario thought strongly “Like a puzzle”
Puzzles got flustered at the comment as it hit him. He felt stupid for not realising it sooner. He didn’t even choose it because of that, even though this was right there to justify it.
“Oh, dear, aren’t you so smart!” he laughed, slowly letting the awkwardness pass him by. 
Mario shook his head.
“Barely if ever”
“Exceptions exist just for that you know”
“Uh- Guess so? Wouldn’t know”
“Say… would you like to listen to me talk about all this?” he gestured at all his notes and sketches.
Mario thought for a bit then answered rather unusually. 
“Sure, yeah” he sat down beside Puzzles as he started going over the intricacies of building up his perfect scenes. Even having them connect so well, although a full script or story was currently not finished, they were genuinely falling into place. Such an impossible feat, working like that. No wonder he was considered a catch if he can do things like that. And Mario ate it all up. Nodding along to his words whenever he looked for validation to continue, without even thinking much about it. It just all came so unsettlingly natural. 
It felt like so much time had passed when Luigi knocked on their door and opened it, seeing Mario leaning on Puzzles while Puzzles was full of excitement talking.
Luigi giggled at the sight which alerted the 2. Although both were flustered Mario was the one who had it worse. 
“Just wanted ask you 2 if you want dinner” Luigi said as he put a hand on his hip, teasing them.
“Oh hmm dinner haha!!” Mario spoke nervously as he got up fast and ran for the kitchen. Puzzles rolled his eyes, looking a little disappointed.
“I see you’ve been working on stuff” Luigi said, pointing at all the stuff scattered on the floor.
“I’ll clean up!”
“Of course!” Luigi giggled “That’s not why I mentioned it”
“Then…?”
“It’s just great to see you have fun! Now come and eat, you probably didn’t eat all day and that’s not good”
Puzzles got up with a smile on his face. He really was having fun. Especially… when Mario joined. Although that thought was quite complex for him and one that made his head hurt, he still couldn’t wipe off the grin he got going on. He felt almost controlled by it. Not in a bad way, just in the way that he couldn’t hide his happiness at all.
They all sat down. Mario devoured food like a bottomless pit while the other 2 ate a normal amount. Mario eating was a bit too loud this time to make casual talk. The way he sounded, he might as well be choking on pasta at the rate he was taking it in his mouth, making sure he had a good mouthful. And this made him messy as all hell as well, if the absolutely disgusting noises he made weren’t enough. Luigi sometimes glanced at his brother, concerned. He did that enough for Puzzles to notice as well. 
As soon as they finished, Luigi grabbed Mario without a word, dragging him to shower. Mario was screaming about not wanting to shower. Puzzles just watched, awkwardly waving him goodbye, as if out of solidarity. And it was but Puzzles was scared if it looked like he was mocking Mario for getting forced to shower. 
He sat there awkwardly for a bit before he decided to go back to Mario’s room. He tidied up his notes and put them neatly together in a way he knew he could use it again. Order was important to him, sometimes the only thing soothing his anxieties.
He sat down on the floor, then slowly flopped over. His ever so crazy creativity going so fast before drowned out his sleepiness but now it came out full force. He thought over the day as he closed his eyes, noting his thoughts one by one. Being invited to hang out with people who he hurt before. He was scared of how that could go. He would understand if they threw him out immediately after seeing him. Hell, maybe it would be a mistake to take him at all! Even when not possessed, he was still a nuisance, not ready for the world at all. And he felt like the world wasn’t ready for him either. Maybe he’ll just choose to stay away from the others and not talk to anyone! Maybe they would even be glad. Yes. Of course. What else would be a better choice than shutting the hell up as soon as he is around people who could easily make him feel awful even just with a slightly negative glance. He would crumble if he even uttered a word. 
The door to the room opened momentarily shaking Puzzles out of his thoughts. Then fully as he saw that Mario was wearing pink pajamas with a mushroom pattern. The mushrooms had faces and looked like they were ripped from some kind of obscure children’s show. Both the top and bottom had mushrooms. What made it actually kind of funny was the miserable face Mario held. Puzzles chuckled at the sight, he found it way too silly like this.
“You like Mario’s drip?”
“Sure do” Puzzles chuckled again “It fits you well”
Mario rolled his eyes.
“What do you know, Puzzles!” He was clearly playing it up dramatically, and he was failing at even acting like it. He was grinning so much. 
Puzzles yawned.
“Well, I know the day had been long”
Mario stepped rather close to Puzzles, clearly expecting something.
Puzzles looked at him, knowing exactly what he wanted. They hadn’t spent too much time together yet but reading Mario was quickly becoming easy for him. He sighed as he got up.
“Okay, but I’m gonna shower first”
Mario sat down, looking up at him with big puppy eyes.
Puzzles groaned at the sight, was it convincing? Absolutely. Was he gonna practice self control for the sake of not only himself but his hygiene? Also yes.
“After I shower I’m yours all night just stop making that face”
Mario nodded. Puzzles left.
Mario was left to his now mildly filled head. It was bouncing thoughts so awfully. He wished he could think about pasta forever but sadly that wasn’t possible for him. Even before, but now even less. It felt like his head from comfortable silence went to experience white noise. Ever so constant, out of nowhere too. He couldn’t say he fully hated it though. Every once in a while, he just wanted to embrace it so strongly, with his whole body, just the amount of passion he felt even just the thought of expressing it shook him sober. Sober on the idea that he genuinely gained feelings for someone like Puzzles. He didn’t like feeling this aware.
Puzzles came back, Mario’s cloud of soberness immediately dissipated into a different world as he latched onto Puzzles. Puzzles felt a little hot over it. At least he could blame it on the hot shower he took.
“Not wasting a single moment, huh?” he teased Mario, kind of half intentionally. Lot of mixed feelings about it but he didn’t want it to end. It was actually kind of nice.And being sleepy did make him clingier as well.
“Nuh-uh”
Puzzles chuckled as he held Mario in his arms while he laid down.
“Say…” Mario started, looking up at Puzzles.
“Hm?”
“Would you like to come over tomorrow to SMG4’s as well?”
“I- I’m not sure he would like that”
“C’mon! I’ll convince him”
“I- I don’t even know what I would say when I’m there. Doesn't everyone else in your friend group hate me? I did bad things so it would be only fair”
“Times are changing, TV man!” Mario playfully booped Puzzles.
“Are you sure?”
“It would also be good to test the grounds before the vacation”
“Test the grounds, huh? I’ll say… I like the way you think”
Mario seemed to freeze. 
“You good, Mario?”
“You got Mario confused… what thinking did he do?”
Puzzles was looking at him, kind of confused but more disappointed.
“C’mon, Mario, I know those braincells of yours can work out some beautiful things. I’ve seen it”
Mario blushed at the compliment but played it off.
“But Mario got no braincells, only himself! That was all Mario original”
Puzzles couldn’t help it, he laughed at the silly joke.
“You know what, just for that, I’ll go with you tomorrow, just make sure you help out if things get bad”
“Yay! Mario will be your cool white knight”
Puzzles couldn’t help the smile that was growing on his screen just thinking about that.
“Alright. Now sleep”
They slowly fell asleep, in such a sure place. Sure as in right. Might be just the weird feelings in them but it felt like their bond strengthened. Maybe they could even take over the world with what they got. God damn it, good for them! Good for them.
The next morning rose, along with Puzzles first this time. He wanted to get Mario off of himself so he could dress up, considering he was in his pajamas. He actually didn’t like loose fitting clothing like this too much on himself. Sure, they were more comfortable to sleep in but that didn’t mean he would like them.
But by GOD, he didn’t have the heart to wake Mario like this. He could imagine the expression he would pull on him if he tried. And that expression is deeply dangerous!
So all he could do was lie there, taking it as if it was a punishment. He wasn’t necessarily that miserable though.
After a while of lying there, he made up his mind. He REALLY wanted to get dressed. And of course, he was right. He got the most sad puppy look of Mario.
“Please just let me dress up”
Mario whined but let go of Puzzles, letting him grab his stuff and then leave to dress in the bathroom.
Mario was looking at the door until Puzzles appeared again. Lucky for himself, he was too sleepy yet to have further thought. All he knew was that he was already missing the warmth. As soon as he was back, Puzzles opened his arms for Mario to come back to.
It wasn’t exactly the same but it still satiated him.
“You know, I never would’ve guessed you would be clingy” Puzzles noted casually while getting his notes out of where he put them to make sure they still made sense. 
“Oh, Mario’s been this way… he would often sleep at SMG4’s for this reason”
“You… would cuddle SMG4?”
“Yes. Anything wrong with it?”
“No, I was just cur-”
“Maybe jealous?”
Puzzles lit red at the accusation.
“I’m not jealous! Don’t be ridiculous!” 
Mario laughed. 
“Mario believes you”
“Thank you”
Puzzles went back to sorting his notes again, although still a bit bothered.  The more he thought about it, he DID feel a bit jealous. And he felt so stupid for it. He shouldn’t even have the audacity to feel that way. 
Mario clinging onto him did sooth the silly thoughts he didn’t want to have. 
Mario let his grip loosen as he turned to the notes. He was looking at them pretty intently.
Puzzles noticed as well.
“Anything wrong, Mario?”
“Just…. this” he pointed at one of the notes which was detailing a character of the movie Puzzles was working on. It was the protagonist.
“Yes?”
“You were saying this character doesn’t have a motive to do things he does yet”
“Yeah?” Puzzles was puzzled by the verbose thoughts from Mario but listened nonetheless.
“A great motivation would be love. For this character” he pointed at another character, it was actually the secondary protagonist “You said you want this character to be more goofy but I think it would make it interesting if these 2 had something more going on. Especially because you could also show a motive for the murder in act 3. Maybe just make that character a little worse and there!”
Puzzles was staring at Mario. Oh, his mind was full of so many thoughts. And he looked so…. Uhuh, Puzzles, what were you thinking there? 
“That… Actually works pretty well. Hell, it could even work as a twist at the end! So unexpected that the comedic character could end up as the motivator. That they were… always meant to be lovers”
“Even better” Mario laughed “Better write it down”
Puzzles hummed.
“Now Mario’s gonna get breakfast”
“Have a great feast” Puzzles teased Mario.
“Mmmmm feast” Mario walked out with a silly smile on his face, thinking about how big a feast can get. Since this was about Mario, probably very big.
Puzzles looked over his notes and corrected over with the new detail where he saw fit. With a few corrections, the story really felt more whole now. Something about the fact that Mario helped him with it also made him love it more. He wondered if he was supposed to feel bad about that. He and Mario didn’t know each other for too long yet so… would it be… would it be bad to say…
Puzzles shook his head as he clumsily reassembled his notes and hastily put them away as he went outside. Why was this so hard to think about?
He left the room to see Mario indeed finished his feast at this point. He was actually lying down on the floor at this point.
Puzzles looked down at Mario confused.
“Mario’s coping” he said weakly.
Puzzles chuckled, smiling down at him.
“Understandable”
They gazed into each other’s eyes until Luigi disturbed them. 
“Puzzles, I have a lot of work around here, can you help? I’d ask Mario but I don’t know-”
“Mario was planning to go to SMG4! WITH Mr Puzzles too!”
Luigi sighed.
“Can you help me with this at least?” Luigi almost pleaded to Puzzles.
“But of course”
“Hmph” Mario stumped off, making sure he’s very far from housework.
“He can be quite a handful sometimes” Luigi sighed again.
“But of course” Puzzles said, chuckling.
Luigi watched him catiously, while still cleaning another dirty plate left by Mario’s Mario-sized feast.
“You like him a lot, huh?”
Puzzles seemed to go into deep thought as he thought over that. 
“I guess so… in some ways”
“Some ways?” Luigi seemed puzzled by the Puzzle himself.
“I… do like spending time with him. He can be nice… my opinion can always change though! I could always… end up hating him”
“Hey I get that. Having any kind of relation with Mario isn’t exactly the easiest thing. He IS hard to handle and can be awful to handle- he can do awful things, sometimes even just to spite you. But when he doesn’t do that I do think he’s worth it. I wouldn’t have anyone else as my brother”
“That’s sweet, Luigi… I just don’t know if I’ll last beside him…”
“Oh?”
“It’s just- maybe I… I don’t know…” Puzzles got rather quiet by the end.
“If you’re scared Mario doesn’t like you, I can assure you he does. He doesn’t exactly latch onto people just like that”
Puzzles felt his screen heat up over the mention of the clinginess Mario could prosper in.
“Okay…”
“Is that all?”
“No… It’s very hard to get back to- everything. And I- never had a real friend before. Even before the- possession, I didn’t focus on it as much as I should have”
“Well… then you just have to be patient. I think you know things will be hard and that shouldn’t stop you”
“Right…. thanks, Luigi”
“Anytime”
“I’m also uh…. I also wanna ask for advice. Because I was convinced to tag along with Mario to SMG4’s and I…”
“You’re scared the crew is gonna hate you?”
“Yeah…”
“I get that, I’d be scared if I were you too. Some of them can be hard headed. But they can be really kind too. If you just act like yourself I think you should be fine”
“Really?”
“Yeah. They might make fun of you but they do that to each other all the time. You should’ve seen how SMG3 and SMG4 were before- But they still all love each other, so who's to say they couldn’t love you too?”
“Mhmm… Yea, you’re making a lot of sense”
“I know. I’m sure you’ll do fine. With Mario as well”
“Thank you, Luigi. Now I’ll feel forever indebted to you”
“Oh you” 
After they finished with the dishes, Puzzles went to get Mario so they could go to SMG4’s. 
He wasn’t in his room.
“Mario?” he called out for him “There aren’t more dishes left, we can go”
No answer.
Panic set.
It’ll be okay! It’ll be so. Fine.
“Mario, please?”
He waited in the room.
“This isn’t the time for games, please”
He paced in the room before leaving the room. He went to Luigi.
“I can’t find him”
“Mario? Hmm” 
Luigi went to the front door. He opened it. He took a big breath in. Puzzles watched in anticipation. 
“MAAARIIIOOOOOOOOOO” he shouted, he sounded amplified,, Puzzles swore he could feel the vibrations of his voice. It must carry far if it was this loud for him. How the hell did he do that? Some kind of Mario brothers gimmick or something? He wasn’t sure.
A worried Mario showed up, seemingly coming from the road he’d take to SMG4’s. Even though he was nervous, Puzzles’s heart sank. Did he not want to bring him along? Maybe he really was a burden.
“Mario! You left Puzzles here!”
Mario froze.
“Oh-” 
Puzzles didn’t say a word.
Mario collected his thoughts.
“Sorry- You still want to come?”
“Sure” Puzzles said, sounding rather defeated.
The 2 set off, Luigi could finally relax while 2 were to fight off tension.
They were silent for a while then, Puzzles not even looking Mario’s way.
“Hey… I’m sorry if I upset you. I… didn’t mean to just- ran after my empty head-”
“I thought you didn’t wanna bring me”
“What?? Why else would Mario ask you??”
“I… I don’t know, to take pity on me?”
“Mario doesn’t take pity”
“But.. you took me in as well-”
“Because Mario finds you cool!”
Puzzles felt himself getting hotter over the compliment.
“You think so?”
“Of course!”
“Well, I… I think you’re cool too” Puzzles chuckled with a lovestruck expression. 
Mario never felt so in love. Damn it.
He jumped up and hugged Puzzles, which halted him as he didn’t want to fall over. He stood for a bit before Mario spoke up, looking up at Puzzles with big puppy eyes.
“Can Mario stay here?”
Puzzles chuckled, trying to stifle his embarrassment with little success.
“Sure, but we’ll keep going”
“Good with Mario”
Puzzles went on, with Mario wrapped on him. He held him with one arm while letting the other relax by his side, following the rhythm of his stride as he followed the path to SMG4’s.
By the time they got there, both got rather used to the contact. It was hard to deny it was rather comfortable.
He saw some of the crew outside, seemingly discussing something. It was Meggy, SMG3 and SMG4, with Eggdog and Beeg there. They noticed the 2. 4 immediately went back to the discussion while the other 2 waved at them. He waved back awkwardly.
“We’re here?” Mario asked.
“We sure are… Do you want to get off?”
“Well, if Mario needs to…” Mario reluctantly loosened his grip on Puzzles, landing on his feet without trouble.
 Mario walked ahead and Puzzles followed behind, still an air of awkwardness with him. The glance 4 took at him alone brought back all the anxiety he was feeling before. 
“Hey you 2!” Meggy greeted the 2. 
“Didn’t know Puzzles was coming today as well, good to see you though” 3 said, while carefully looking to 4 too. He knew something was going on with him. Puzzles understood what he was getting.
“Hi” 4 said as he turned around, only one glance at Puzzles then looking at Mario. Even that single glance burned him.
“Mario, remember when we were talking about an event idea for 3’s café?”
They started talking about something Puzzles couldn’t contribute to. So he just stood there awkwardly. Not wanting to go anywhere because he didn’t want to leave Mario’s side but also wanted to leave so badly because he was feeling so awkward. And it definitely didn’t help that he was also really tall compared to the others. Really made him feel like he was never meant to fit in. He wished he could sink into the floor until he felt someone poke him on his forearm. He turned around to see Tari.
“Hi” she said, with a look of understanding. 
“Hey?” he wasn’t sure how to respond.
“You weren’t here before so I was wondering how good you are at games!” she said, already dragging him along. 
“Oh! Sure!” 
Mario looked at him.
“Okay! Happy gaming for you!”
Tari brought Puzzles inside, letting him take a seat on the couch in the gaming room.
“Okay… Puzzles” she looked at him with certain firmness, a sort of care “You looked like a shaking leaf. Sorry if I- appeared suddenly, I just wanted to help you out. You don’t need to game if you don’t want to”
“Uh- Thanks, Tari. I want to try at least. Just be gentle heh” he chuckled.
“But only this time”
Tari brought up Smash and showed Puzzles the controls and showed off stuff in game as well. Letting him get used to it, he didn’t play super awful. He didn’t win a single time but he did put up a good fight. 
“Sorry, Puzzles” Tari was feeling bad “It’s really hard to turn my gamer brain off. You could try fighting against a bot?”
“A bot?”
“Yeah. It’s a player controlled by the game”
“Sounds good”
They played for a while until Meggy appeared there too.
“Gaming going well?” she asked as she sat beside Tari.
“Sure is” Puzzles smiled “I didn’t know games could be so much fun”
“And this is only one! We have quite a few more here. I also have other games I sometimes bring over” Tari cheered.
“By the way” Meggy spoke more quietly “Sorry I couldn’t help you out, Puzzles. I wanted to but the talk of the café event was pretty important too.
“No worries. What’s it gonna be?”
“We’re still in the idea phase. Maid event came up but 3 shot it down”
“Maids, huh? I’d prefer butler” Tari said.
“To dress as one or to be served by one?” Meggy asked.
“Both” Tari giggled.
“Well, now I want to be a butler for it. Maybe I’ll mention that to 3.
“Oh, yeah, how did you manage to get away?”
Meggy took a bit to reply.
“Well… 4 wanted to talk to Mario privately”
Both girls hummed while Puzzles froze.
“Oh, I hope it’s nothing bad”
It was something bad, Mario could feel as he followed 4, rather quietly. It felt like if he tried anything he would be killed on sight.
“So” 4 sat down on his bed, patting the spot beside him for Mario to sit down. Mario hesitated but sat down.
“Did Mario do something wrong?”
“I’ll decide that when I know more. You are pretty clingy with him, huh?”
Mario turned red. Not only did this feel like an interrogation, it was also about his maybe-kinda-probably crush.
“Guess so” he looked away.
“Did he do something to you? Hurt you? Manipulate you? Why are you letting him live with you?”
“Mario just… wanted to be kind”
“That can’t be it. You can tell me if he tried to threaten you”
“But he didn’t! He’s actually really nice”
4 didn’t seem satisfied with the answer.
“He must have gotten to you badly”
“Oh, awfully” Mario flushed at the thought. 
4 wasn’t happy.
“You like him or something??” he asked, anger dripping out of his words.
The longer Mario didn’t reply the more sure 4 was.
“I can’t believe you. We don’t even know if we can REALLY trust him!”
“You’re not even giving him a chance!”
���You wouldn’t either if you knew what I went through because of him!”
“You would if you knew what happened in the void!”
“Shut up! He probably manipulated you then as well!”
“Why are you so insistent? Are you jealous or something?!”
“I just want to protect you” 4 sighed, lowering his voice “You’re important to me, Mario. You’re my best friend”
Mario didn’t know how to reply as he left the room, tears falling from his eyes.
“Wait!” 4 ran after him.
The 3 in the gaming room heard Mario leave. Puzzles felt it in his soul. He was terribly sad. And scared. 
“We have to check on him. He’s doing awful” Puzzles said.
The 2 girls followed him. They went to Mario outside but 4 was still trying to catch him.
“It’s gonna be worse if he betrays you when you like him” 4 shouted after Mario. He didn’t realise the other 3 were there.
Meggy ran up beside 4, grabbing him by the shoulder with force.
“You’re just making him more upset! This won’t make anything better!!”
“But what if he tries something?? He can’t-”
“Yeah, what if I try something?” Puzzles spoke up, while looking down. He wasn’t being silly, he felt scared. 
“It’s like he’s confessing to a crime right now!! Can he really be trusted??”
“Is it too far-fetched to say someone could redeem himself? Or did you never actually trust SMG3?” Mario spoke up, rather angry at 4. Throwing words he might not mean later but he was so angry. It engulfed him and Puzzles too. Puzzles could feel it burn, he was so mad. 
“That’s fucking different!” 4 lunged at him after prolonged silence. 
“And how so?? Do you have proof??” 
“Why would you say something like this about someone like him??”
“Because you speak like that about Puzzles”
“Because- UGH” 4 gave up as he walked away, leaving without another word. His aura somehow seemed to remain though as the 4 of them couldn’t say a word for a while now.
Mario was the first one to do anything, he walked up to Puzzles and held one of his hands in his.
“I trust you, don’t worry” he looked up at him, showing a hopeful smile. Puzzles smiled back.
“Thank you. At least someone… believes that”
“Hey, we believe in you too!” Tari said.
“Yeah! We’re here for you, Puzzles. Even if you did bad things in the past”
“I guess… SMG4 just doesn’t forgive. But honestly I get it. I did awful things. Then again I helped him get with SMG3-” he joked lightly. Mario chuckled at it.
“In a weird way, yeah” Meggy and Tari chuckled too.
Puzzles was glad his silly moment was a hit with the crowd. Good grade for socialisation. 
“But back to it. You’re right… it seems he doesn’t forgive easily. I’m sorry if this made things hard for you” Meggy apologised for 4. 
“You don’t need to be sorry!” Puzzles reassured her “I just hope he’ll be able to calm down. I… I don’t hate him”
“Puzzles is right, we can’t apologise for someone else. 4 will have to do that himself” Tari reassured Meggy, who earned a smile in return.
“By the way, we could go back to gaming” Puzzles suggested.
“Let’s go gaming!!” Mario cheered.
The 4 went back inside to keep playing fun games.
4 paced in his room, starting to doubt stuff. He swore he was right, he was so sure he was right. This man, he knew, he had wicked plans. Wicked plans to ruin people. He almost ruined SMG3, his world, he almost ruined his world for good. It made him so angry. The idea that he could lose his best friend that… that monster. It made him so angry. He wanted nothing more than to cut him out of their life. He wished he didn’t exist at all. So nobody would’ve gotten hurt by his schemes, let that be trauma from being killed several times, risk of losing your privacy, losing oneself to perfection, losing oneself to self loathing and the idea that you’re not enough. He had an impressive collection of things he had done and he didn’t understand how anyone could trust him. How Mario seemed to adore him so much…
Did… Did Mario fall in love with Puzzles?
No… No way. He would act differently about that. He was just… Maybe Mario is playing 4D chess with Puzzles. Sure.
Stop lying to yourself, SMG4. You know very well that you are just trying to make yourself feel better because you can’t cope with the things that happened to you. You’re lashing out because you feel alienated. But you don’t know that. You can’t put it into words. All you know is that you hate Puzzles.
You hate him so much.
He paced around a little more. It was so unfair. Why did it only have to be him?
He left the castle, walking. Just walking. Somehow ending up right back in the café.
“Hey, where were you bl- Oh my god” 3 reacted accordingly to how 4 looked. He looked so messed up.
3 dragged him away to fix him up as much as he could.
“You can’t be serious” 3 whined.
“It’s not fair” it was all 4 could say.
“What’s not fair? I’ll listen” 3 said, cupping 4’s face. But instead of saying anything he burst into tears. 
3 hugged 4, not really caring much about someone screaming outside to order.
“There there…I’m guessing this is about Mr Puzzles”
“Yeah…” 4 said, kind of ashamed in a way. It was hard to deal with the fact that no one else seemed to care.
“You know… I don’t like him too much either but… I don’t really want to concentrate on it. I’d rather give him space to improve than to… push him into new villainy.”
“But… He could take Mario from us… What would I…. Would I be a good friend if I lost him just like that, because I let things happen?”
“Blue, you’re making things worse right now… I bet Mario isn’t happy about this either. And he can fend for himself. Don’t take the guardian part of your name this seriously”
“But I… 3…” 4 seemed to press on.
3 hugged him tighter.
“I’m hugging the worry out of you, 4”
4 chuckled.
“You’re being so silly right now”
“And you’re smiling about it. It’s working.”
“You know you could… do something else to get the worry out of me…”
3 was staring at 4. 4 was staring at 3 with an emotion he identified way too quickly.
“Shush… Don’t tempt me right now. After work you can”
“Bummer”
3 gave him a quick peck on the lips.
“Too bad! Now work, slave” he said jokingly as he then left outside to finally take the yelling costumer’s order.
4 sighed, getting himself together. He couldn’t fail 3. He already did bad enough today.
The day went by rather decently. Even if the feelings didn’t leave. They festered in their minds. Almost unkillable. With so much guilt. Rage. Anxiety. Love. So much.
Hard to bear. Too hard.
The night grew closer. Mario excused himself for a walk from gaming. 
It felt like he was in a bubble. The world felt unreal around him. So many things happening. Weighing on him. He didn’t want any of this. He wondered if he deserved it anyways. Pain. Pain. Pain. Love. Pain. Guilt. Pain. Sadness. Love. Guilt. Guilt. Guilt.
Guilt.
He ran and ran until he felt his soul reach back to Earth. He looked around, it was dark. Just a dark night. It was comforting. He sat down in the grass looking up at the sky. Being alone was like medicine. Sure, he enjoyed his time playing with his friends as well. Especially with Puzzles. He actually managed to beat Mario in smash because he got distracted with him. He may have a competitive heart but it’s also really stupid. Nevertheless, the grin and cheer of Puzzles made it feel like Mario won instead. Won guilt.
Guilt.
Guilt.
Was it his fault that SMG4 was acting that way? How could he ever make sure this didn’t happen again? He cared so much about him. He wanted to make things better for him so badly. 
Love.
Puzzles. He… 
Guilt.
He couldn’t ever hurt him. Even if he was forced, he’d fail to. 
So there’s only one person he could actually hurt.
He went back inside. The thought not leaving his mind. 
But he pretended. He pretended he was fine. But it was eating him up.
There was only one person he could actually hurt. For the benefit of his best friend.
And nobody noticed a thing. 
He went back home with Puzzles.  Nobody noticed.
He got home and had a shower. And still, nobody noticed. 
He told Puzzles he’d be back after a midnight snack. He still didn’t seem to notice.
Mario left the room. With steps that felt heavy but were lighter than a feather. He didn’t need Luigi to know. He took all sharp utensils out of the drawers. cutting himself in the process. It hurt.
But it didn’t do a thing. It was like the scene changed and his hands weren’t even hurt now. As pristine as ever. he bashed his hands on as many sharp edges as possible. Hoping for something to stick but nothing. It was like the world was against him hurting himself.
He cursed to himself as he tried again and again. While his hands didn’t retain even a sign of hurt, his blood still remained. Odd. He did feel a bit light headed. He tried to stab himself as well, in as many places as he could think of but it all yielded the same result of nothing truly sticking. But that might have been from him concentrating so hard on hurting himself. To get him out of this hell he put himself into. He made a big mistake. If only he waited enough inside that void for the meme guardians to save him. If only he didn’t feel a sort of kinship. If only he didn’t start liking Puzzles. If only it was so easy to cut him out of his life. If it was only so easy to make SMG4 happy. If it was only so easy for Mario to be happy. To not worry. To not feel guilty. To not feel like the cause of everything bad happening.
He felt frustrated, not knowing what he could use.
Puzzles appeared, soft light coming from his room as Puzzles seemed to turn on a smaller one. It gave him a glow. Like a saviour.
“Mario? What are you doing?” Puzzles asked, trying to keep back just how worried he was.
Mario didn’t react.
If only he didn’t take out the piece. If only he didn’t feel bad for it.
The piece…
The piece. 
Mario, without a word, bolted for the door, leaving in record speed. Puzzles went after him.
He ran after him as much as he could. But he couldn’t keep up.
He cried, holding it right at the scar. The ties. It hurt. It hurt from the pain Mario felt.
Puzzles locked eyes with the ground, concentrating. The energy, he felt it connecting the 2 of them. He searched in it. A blinding power. 
And he concentrated on it further. He wanted this to be over so badly it brought physical results.
He stopped Mario in his tracks. With only his mind. He finally managed to catch up and catch Mario in his arms.
Puzzles felt warm and comforting. The light was still strong but slowly dimmed as Puzzles held Mario in his arms.
They didn’t need to speak a word. Mario tightly hugged back, crying into Puzzles’s shoulder. 
They were there for a while. 
Just in each other’s arms, settled in silence. They understood. As much they could.
Mario’s sniffles slowly calmed down. Puzzles got up, with his arms still wrapped around Mario as he began to walk back right to their room.
Even the walk was silent but both sure were thinking. Especially as they passed by the painful red reminder. Puzzles felt like he got there too late. That he should’ve listened to the signs earlier. At least he still caught Mario from doing something bad. 
They got in their room. Puzzles settled down.
“Listen…” Puzzles started carefully “You don’t need to explain yourself if you don’t want to. That’s fine. I know you’re going through a lot I can feel it and I’m sorry… I wish I could help you more. You… helped me and… here I am… making life hell for you…”
Mario grabbed Puzzles’s head. He had a rather firm grip. They were looking at each other.
Puzzles still had that guilty look.
“I’m really sorry, Mario I-”
But before he could say another word, Mario pressed a kiss on Puzzles’s screen, immediately shutting him up. 
“You’re so much, Puzzles”
Puzzles didn’t even know what to say, his screen was just increasingly heating up. In fact he was way too hot. Mario took his hand away from his face as even through his gloves he could feel the heat becoming too hot.
“Ouch, you could fry an egg on your face” Mario tried to joke. 
Puzzles seemed frozen until he slammed Mario down and held him. He held him so hard. Something about that just made him open up more than anything else. He felt like his soul was ripped open and it felt better than anything he ever felt. 
Mario felt a bit helpless under the weight of Puzzles. Not that he minded. It was actually kind of comfortable. 
Mario wondered what SMG4 would think.
And just as that thought crossed his mind, Puzzles rose up, straddling Mario, face to face.
“What are you thinking?” Puzzles asked, a sort of carefulness carrying in his tone. Showing how cautious he was but especially just how much he cared.
Mario felt hot himself, which was obvious as Puzzles screen wasn’t exactly dim enough to hide that.
“I want you”
That stopped both. Now you’ve done it!
The 2 just stared at each other.
“I need you” Puzzles one upped the other, leaning a little closer. 
This felt like a dream.
Mario pulled Puzzles’s head down enough to press another kiss on it. 
How could this feel so natural? Brain in havoc.
As another kiss. Another move. The comfortable pressure. A bite.
A bite?
A bite into the neck. But a gentle one at Puzzles’s neck, which slowly intensified. It was like Mario knew exactly how to get to him. It felt like this could escalate further before Puzzles stopped Mario from another silly little move up his sleeve.
“We should sleep…” he said.
“But…” Mario looked at him with the biggest eyes.
“No buts” he sounded a little cranky.
“I love you”
Oh. Oh alright. That really did it. Well, no stopping now!
They slept in for quite a bit. Sure wonder why.
Luigi decided not to bother them, considering some… things he heard in the night while passing by to go to the bathroom. Better not to bother them.
They took a while to wake up but first Mario did. At least he got time to admire Puzzles in a different way… At least as much as he could from where he was, locked in the hold of him. Honestly, he looked a bit more freaky in the light seeping in but that honestly just made Mario adore him more. With a body that looked so machine yet bore scars that felt like flesh. Maybe part of the reason he didn’t want to show skin. He didn’t know something like that was possible. Adoring Puzzles even more, especially so openly. I mean after what happened… would be a little concerning if he wasn’t… Or at least confusing.
While he could admire Puzzles till the heat death of the universe, Puzzles stirred at some point too.
“Morning, Mar” he said, still kinda sleepy.
“Mar? I like that” 
“Mhmm…” Puzzles cleared his screen a bit, as if to wash the sleepiness away. As he took in his surroundings more, he felt the heat… his fans could barely keep up.
“I-I thought I dreamed that” 
“I’m happy you didn’t”
“Yeah….… me too… sure did feel like a dream too… I… felt like I wasn’t fully… in control? I don’t know”
Mario grinned.
“That’s one way to describe wanting Mario so badly”
Puzzles blushed.
“You’ve no shame!”
Mario laughed at the response.
“You’re not wrong”
Puzzles got up and started dressing up. Mario couldn’t resist looking. Even doing the fuckboy expression, biting his lip.
But when Puzzles looked at him he looked away, as if he was innocent. They continued this until Puzzles looked at Mario rather annoyed and half dressed.
“I know you’re staring at me! You don’t need to”
Mario looked down, a lovestruck grin on his face.
“Mario can’t help it. You’re nice to look at”
“Am… Am I?”
“Yeah” Mario trailed off, slowly caressing Puzzles’s calf that was closer to him
He almost gave in again. 
“No! We have to prepare! We have a whole trip to go on!”
“Buuut Mario loves youuu!!”
“Not gonna work this time. Love you too though”
Puzzles seemed to be able to finally get dressed while Mario was melting on the floor. Melting with love. That’s all that was in his head. Nothing else right now. If only that could last forever.
Mario got up, grabbing stuff to dress up as well.
Puzzles was staring at his back.
“Ayo? And you shame Mario for staring?”
Puzzles brushed it off, reaching to a spot on Mario’s back. It looked burnt but in technicolour. It stung, pain coursing through Mario’s body.
“Does this hurt?”
Mario cried out as he fell over but it was too comical to take it seriously.
“Oh I’m sorry, dear! I didn’t know I ended up hurting you!”
“It’s fine!! Mario’s fine!” he got up “Mario will just..- continue on without a shirt for now”
“Yeah, I’m really sorry though. I didn’t mean to hurt you at all” he cupped Mario’s face in his hands. Mario leaned into it.
“You’re really affectionate with Mario now” he grinned so hard about it, even Puzzles couldn’t interpret this in a negative way. If he did, he’d have to be an idiot for that. And one bigger than Mario at that.
“Is that a problem? I’ll stop” he grinned, teasing Mario as he took his hands back.
Mario huffed in response.
“Mario loves affection… Mario loves you” the shyness compared to his previous behaviour- the difference was staggering! Puzzles found him adorable either way. Oh, wasn’t he such a weird combination of lovestarved and a hopeless romantic for this silly italian? Maybe it’s not exactly like in TV but he would lie if he said he wasn’t happy. He hoped nothing would come between them. He really did hope.
Maybe a tiny bit of worry in the back of his mind. Just the sliver of a chance that something could go terribly wrong. 
“Well, time to pack” Puzzles got up after thinking for a while. Mario looked at him like he was expecting something.
“What?” he asked.
“You forgot to say it back…”
Puzzles sighed and raised Mario up in the air by his armpits.
“I love you too, silly man”
The new name Mario got for himself visibly flustered him. Though that quickly turned into joy.
“Mario IS silly!! The silliest!!”
“And do you know what silliest men do?”
“Love their TV men?”
Puzzles chuckled.
“Maybe. But packing for vacation first and foremost”
Mario sighed.
“Okayy” 
Puzzles put him down.
Puzzles started to pack for himself, taking his sweet time making sure his stuff is as compact and perfectly packed as possible. So good in fact that Tetris players would be jealous of his skills. He laughed at his little joke in his head. He was SO smart. He felt like he was on cloud nine. Maybe what they did yesterday- really eased him up. Which was a good thing. He was kind of happy to have Mario, whatever that meant for the both of them.
As he finished, he noticed Mario struggling with it. He seemed to panic. 
“Dear, are you not good at packing?” Puzzles sat beside him, looking to see he indeed had quite the mess in his suitcase.
“Luigi usually does it for Mario” Mario said, feeling a little ashamed.
“Hey, I’ll help you! I’ve already done mine”
And so Puzzles basically packed for Mario as well. Just as neatly as for himself. Mario watched each hand movement and gesture Puzzles did, like a cat trying to calculate when to pounce.
Mario grew impatient and reached out quickly, grabbing Puzzles’s hand.
Puzzles wasn’t sure how to react for a second. This wasn’t anything strange from Mario to him but he did catch him off guard. 
“Mar, dear… we can hold hands later”
Mario looked at him like a sad wet puppy. Puzzles sighed and grabbed him, placing in his lap. Mario gratefully took it as his rightful place, while Puzzles continued packing with some trouble while trying to inquire what else Mario needed. Who knew a man in his lap could be so distracting. He wasn’t sure if he was fully comfortable but it was also way too nice. He liked the closeness and all. But the weight felt strange and alien to him still. He didn’t know before how he exactly imagined cuddling but the weight was definitely something to him. Just a constant reminder of a presence to him. He was used to feeling lonely. Just because he was brainwashed it didn’t mean he forgot about that. So this presence… In general, as it had been in these past few days, the moment Mario took that piece out of him as well. He swore he felt this all was meant to happen when all that went down. He may have gone a bit crazy but… can you REALLY blame him?
They got done, they went out, seeing Luigi had packed everything else they needed for the somewhat short trip. He stared at the other 2, knowing, especially at Mario, considering he didn’t have a shirt on.
“Mario, do you plan to dress up?”
“Mario’s back really hurts, he can’t” he whined.
“It can’t be that bad- OH MY GOD” Luigi freaked out when he saw it “how did this happen??”
“I… I can’t recall right now…. could’ve been anything” Puzzles said, with little confidence. He didn’t lie but he wasn’t actually trying to be sincere either.
“I’ll see what I can do for your back” Luigi took Mario to the bathroom. Puzzles watched helplessly. He didn’t exactly want to get involved, as much as this was his fault.
He felt bad about it, awful even. He let one person get close to him and it felt like he already ruined it. Maybe now Mario is really only with him out of pity. Who would want to be around someone who hurt them? Especially at such a vulnerable time. He didn’t want the thought to fester. He really didn’t want to. But it did, like a virus, he could feel it in all that was left of his nervous system.
He wondered if he even deserved Mario in the first place. Or if he maybe only brought Mario suffering. And he still felt out of place. How could he fit into a tight knit group of friends anyways? 
And just as he got so deep, the brothers made it back, Mario looking grumpy with a shirt on while Luigi felt a little tired.
“Alright, let’s get going to SMG4’s, we’ll be late at this rate” Luigi said.
Puzzles carried the heaviest suitcases because he was actually the strongest of the 3 but also he just really wanted to occupy himself. And so he was quiet. And he didn’t say a thing about it but Mario noticed. And he didn’t like the silence coming from Puzzles. He wasn’t a therapist or anything but it didn’t exactly feel pleasant or nice. But he brushed it off for now. He just hoped he could make Puzzles feel better in some way or another. Probably in a way that doesn’t end up with him getting more toxic goop on himself that made his skin burn. He didn’t realise it yesterday but Puzzles felt… acidic? Weird stuff.
After a walk that felt longer than it should, they got to the crew. Everyone seemed ready and  were waiting for them. Nobody really felt negative outwardly about this except for 4. Though, he seemed to hold back, with 3 close to him. Puzzles felt this wasn’t going to be the easiest time. 
They got into a bus they rented for this. At least Puzzles was told it was rented but who knows with these guys. Not that he was really that against a bit of crime but he would rather be aware if he was made an accomplice in something like that.
What made him think that was the fact that there was a driver inside but they didn’t look very happy about having to do this. In fact, they looked rather scared. Puzzles decided to push the thought aside as he ascended on the bus the best he could with his tall build.
He sat beside Mario, Luigi went to talk with the others. Puzzles sat by the window. Due to the length of his legs, he actually took up 2 seats and Mario was kind of sitting on his leg. Not that he needed to, there would’ve been space for him elsewhere. But it seemed Mario was visibly very stubborn about sitting with Puzzles. 4 was increasingly bothered by this. 3 grew tired of this at this point, talking with Meggy and Tari instead. 
It was quite the long trip, it was a few hours. It was long with the emotions it had to drag with itself. It felt like it was anchoring time down, intentionally making it harder for time to go on.
But they got there, relatively in good spirit. 4 was really bringing it down. In his obsession to protect Mario he didn’t even notice it was affecting the others as well. In fact, most of the trip, 3 was quietly talking about how annoying he was right now to Meggy and Tari. Listing the ways he had to pander to at least somewhat calm him down which soon stopped working. Though, he tried to be cool about it because he was worried too. He didn’t hate 4 for this, he knew it must be harder for him. But this was beginning to become a lot for him. As much as he loved him, with his whole heart, his mental state kind of reminded him of the perfect incident. It really scared him. Especially because what if something similar happened to him like then. With someone evil enough to take advantage of the situation. And make their life hell.
Regardless, they were there now, packing out to a rather large apartment type of building by the beach. It had enough rooms to house everyone. Luigi kindly asked to be in a different room from Mario and Puzzles, which left the crew questioning for a second. Regardless, he somehow ended up with Saiko and Melony.
They took out the guest bed for him. He put his stuff down neatly.
“So, how come you didn’t want to stay with Mario this time?” Saiko asked, suspicious of this. Melony was sitting on the bed while sorting out her suitcase to take her laptop out she brought for the trip. She was listening though.
“Ah well…” Luigi sighed, a bit annoyed.
“It can’t be that bad” 
“I’m pretty sure they had sex yesterday night”
That shocked both girls, even Melony looked up from the stuff she pulled up to sift through. She recently got into hacktivism to pass the time so it was related to that. Some kind of an article from someone she looked up to.
“Are- Are you sure??”
“Yeah. I kind of- heard them. I OBVIOUSLY didn’t want to” he sighed again. It wasn’t the fact that he found it weird or bad but it was still kind of mind boggling to think about. Especially because just before Mario was crying to him about crushing on Puzzles and now this? Things moved fast with these 2.
“Huh…” Saiko thought for a bit “I see it honestly”
“Mario did have that kind of glow to him” Melony commented which made both look at her weird.
“Nah, he actually burned his back with- whatever comes out of Puzzles’s screen. I don’t know how they did that and why but I don’t need to know”
“BURNED??” both girls yelled in unison. 
“Yeah. I actually had to treat it for him today so he could wear a shirt at least while we get here. It looked pretty rough”
“Mario and the things he gets into I swear” Saiko didn’t know whether to laugh or feel annoyed. Maybe a bit of both if she had to be honest.
“I just hope SMG4 doesn’t freak out too much if hears about this” Luigi thought out loud, concerned. Even scared for his brother.
“Why would he? It’s kind of none of his business” Melony said.
“He really seems to hate Puzzles. I don’t really get it but…”
“I’ve noticed” Saiko was annoyed too “Look, I get it, he was bad but there was a reason for that. Besides, he IS dating SMG3, he’s so unreasonable”
“I have a feeling he just wants to protect Mario but… I’m thinking he might have been doing the opposite…”
The 2 looked at him, at the brink of the worry rising in them. 
“Go on” Saiko said finally.
“I uh… woke up to a pool of blood in the kitchen. I don’t know how it got there… it… could be Mario’s…And there was no sign of struggle. Nothing knocked over or anything, just a single misplaced knife and a pool of blood… it led me to believe that he… he…”
They were looking at him shocked. Luigi finally broke down. The 2 girls scrambled to comfort him, Melony as much as she could with her laptop in her lap. They were just hoping the worst wouldn’t happen. Hopefully.
After a bit of time passed, they heard knocking at their door.
Turns out it was 4, he was gathering everyone to come down. 
The 3 tagged along, following him along with the others.
A big part of the crew was there, with the Mario brothers, the meme guardians, all 4, Melony, Saiko and Puzzles of course. Meggy and Tari decided to stay in their rooms for a bit. The bus driver seemed to vanish for some reason. As they went out they noticed Boopkins was already in there with Bob who had a bright pink donut pattern floaty. He also had those gaudy kind of sunglasses that were gold so it kind of balanced out.
Saiko slowly entered the water, helping Melony out while Mario quickly charged in the water, splashing people on the way. 4 ran after him, yelling about manners. There was something unsettling about his tone of voice but he didn’t say anything wrong. Yet it remained eerie regardless. Puzzles also silently wondered when 4 would mention Mario’s back. He was surprised he didn’t, maybe it was the reason his tone of voice felt so unsettling. Like he was expecting him to lash out again. BUT he knew 4 saw it, he saw that he saw it. And it was terrifying.
1 and 2 set up chairs and parasols so they could enjoy the beach without too much sun. They were also seemingly discussing important meme guardian business as they usually would. 
Puzzles decided to stay back, quietly, sitting just barely in the water. He didn’t want to interfere with 4 and Mario. His reaction to Mario’s back was already scary enough for him. Not even a word, just looking at him so deeply judgmentally. The thoughts reemerged, the idea that he really didn’t deserve any respect. That he deserved a life meant for loneliness and nothing else. Just like how he was before. It would probably be easier. If only Mario let him die instead, he wouldn’t need to be such a black sheep within such great people. He could have moved on from a painful life. He could’ve ended it there. it could’ve been so good.
“Oi, you don’t want to come in deeper?” 3 asked Puzzles, which shook him out of the awful thoughts.
“No… Don’t want to disturb Mar and SMG4 having fun. I think they deserve it”
3 sighed.
“You’re selfless for being lonely for so long. I would be so much more jealous”
“Jealous?”
“You obviously love him, no? I know the signs. Way too well”
Puzzles heated up at how easy he was to read.
“Oh dear… I didn’t know it was that obvious”
“So then? Don’t you just… want him by your side?”
“I… I don’t know if I deserve him” he got rather quiet.
“Blue is a dumbass, don’t let him tear you down”
“But is he really? I.. even hurt Mario”
“Hurt him?”
“Uh… Not important how”
3 stared at Puzzles. Puzzles stared back.
“Oh-.. kay but… really. I don’t get you”
“I made life harder for him. He had… an episode of sorts yesterday. He doesn’t take SMG4’s behavior well and it feels like it’s my fault… I mean if I was just… dead… he wouldn’t”
“Y’know, 4 and I cause each other problems all the time.”
“I think this is different”
“I used to try to terrorise him. We were some… awful people to each other. Worse than what you are for Mario. And we still got here. You know how?”
“No…”
“Love prevails… as much as I hated to admit it before”
“You think so?”
“Definitely. And because of you and that shitty piece of that damned box, I learned it very intimately”
“Sorry about that..”
“Thank you”
“You what now?”
“It might sound messed up but I needed that I think… We both needed it. I never realised before how stubborn 4 was actually about me. I never would’ve figured out if it didn’t get so bad. We might still be here, not dating but still painfully pining if it wasn’t for you”
“I assume you’re joking”
“No. We were a hopeless case” 3 laughed.
Puzzles reacted with chuckling as well.
“Well, I just hope I can somehow… convince 4 that I’m good enough for Mario”
“Way better way to think. I’m going in now, good luck”
3 left in, jumping on 4 and pushing him in the water with a swift and calculated move. Puzzles chuckled at the sight, especially as then they begin to playfully fight. 4 was way less freaky with a smile on his face, having fun. He almost wished that could be a sight that would look at him that way. Just a sliver of acceptance for him. 
He looked up at the sky, thinking stuff through. So many things he wanted to do. And number 1 on his list was to make 4 like him, whatever it would take. He felt like he was trying to achieve the approval of a protective father. While no, it was just his dear’s bestie.
He wondered how he could even do that. It definitely wouldn’t be him trying to show off with his skills. 4 would think he was shallow and maybe even think he was planning something worse secretly. If he poured his heart out, 4 probably wouldn’t listen either. Maybe Mario could put in a good word for him? Or the others, as much as they can. Convincing 4 that he wasn’t evil anymore was way more trouble than what his ideas could change. He sighed.
He suddenly jerked up at the sensation of someone poking his shoulder several times. It was Mario.
“What’s up, Mario?”
“You were sitting here, alone”
“I didn’t want to disturb your time with SMG4”
“Mario has space for everyone”
“SMG4 is questionable in that regard”
Mario could only sigh in response as he leaned onto Puzzles’s shoulder.
They spent time silently, it was maybe a bit too silent for Mario. It looked like he was out of energy.
“Say…” Puzzles started awkwardly after a while.
“Hm?”
“How’s… your back”
“It was totally worth it”
“That’s- That’s NOT what I asked”
“But that’s what Mario cares about”
“YOU… You’re so shameless” Puzzles couldn’t help but smile.
“Maybe. But you love Mario either way”
“I sure do”
They stayed in comfortable silence. 
Meggy and Tari finally arrived as well. Meggy had her hands behind her back, nothing suspicious. The grin on her face was definitely not suspicious as well.
She looked around, looking for the right victim to strike. She spotted the one least suspecting it: Bob, looking half asleep on his silly floaty. She aimed with precision champions would get jealous about. She then shot, water sprung out of her gun, hitting Bob just right, knocking off his glasses.
“WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR??” he shouted, looking around for  the culprit.
Meggy and Tari were loudly laughing about this so it didn’t take a lot  for Bob to see them. 
“What, Bob? can’t handle a bit of water, eh?”
Bob didn’t reply verbally, instead he pulled out his mega deluxe golden water guns that matched his sunglasses he was so painfully separated from.
And from here, a war began as others brought out their guns too.
Puzzles panicked as he quickly got up and ran away, while Mario sadly got caught in the fight, he had no choice but to join in.
He found a place to hide, he was out of view by this large rock.
He sat down and tried his best to calm down. His circuits could’ve gotten damaged there badly. He didn’t want to think of the nightmare that would be fixing that kind of damage. He had to once and he still wasn’t sure if he fully recovered from it.
He just sat there, in the sand, still feeling the water dripping down on his lower limbs. The sand sticking to him felt uncomfortable but he could manage. 
He sighed, laying against the rock. His mind felt a little empty. He didn’t exactly expect to be left alone like this. Maybe it was just his brain playing tricks on him but he felt uneasy for some reason.
That reason turned out to come realy quick by. SMG4. Just the 2 of them. 
“AH!!” Puzzles got surprised by 4’s presence as he stared him down as he was good for nothing.
“I’ve got a few words for you” he said, it seemed he wouldn’t waste his time with useless small talk.
“Yeah?” Puzzles was scared.
“The bruise on his back was you, wasn’t it? What did you do to him?”
“I uh…” Puzzles got quickly nervous “You don’t need to know that”
One of 4’s eyes twitched. He was NOT happy.
“If I find out you’re controlling him this way, you’re dead”
“I’m not! I promise. I care about him too, okay? He hadn’t been doing well”
“Like I’d believe you. If you really aren’t controlling him you would tell how he got the bruise”
“I said you don’t want to know”
“It was clearly you”
“Yeah, but you don’t need to know how”
“What could be worse than fucking mind control goop??”
“...Acidic…” Puzzles turned away, honestly thinking about it just made him heat up all over again.
“Acidic??” 4 was unsure what to think. He was trying to be mad but he was more lost on where this was going.
“And it… got on his back on accident… I didn’t mean to, we… got carried away” Puzzles tried to leave out the most important part.
“C…Carried away? With… WIth what?” 4 was left confused as he was trying to figure it out. But Puzzles wasn’t replying anymore, instead strongly trying to avoid eye contact with 4.
“Did…” it clicked for him “Holy fuck, Mr Puzzles, did you fuck my best friend??”
Puzzles grew visibly more nervous.
4 was left more confused if anything.
“I-  I don’t know what you’re planning with… all this you’re doing but you’ll NEVER convince me”
“I get that…”
“Blah blah I can’t hear your pitiful acting” 4 left, not listening to Puzzles’s words which actually were as sincere as they get.
“It’s okay…” Puzzles got up “I just wish you didn’t ruin stuff this way for other people” he said that last part under his breath, which 4 luckily didn’t end up hearing.
“You know, I really don’t get your deal” 4 said.
“I have no deal. I just wanna live again”
“That’s what they all say”
“Didn’t SMG3 have a similar thing”
“Unlike you, he wasn’t a parasite on other people”
“I… was invited”
“Maybe if you had a spine you would have declined”
Ouch.
“Maybe… It would be easier for you, would’t it? For the both of you. If I were just… out of the picture”
4 didn’t say anything. When it was said outloud like this it felt… different.
Puzzles continued.
“I want you to get one single thing through your head if it won’t be anything else” Puzzles said, glaring at 4 “You can believe I’m still a villain all you want, you can believe I want to hurt people all you want. But if you do this to the detriment of Mario’s mental health and constantly try to infantilize him with trying to ‘’’’’’’care’’’’’’’’’’’ for him, thinking you know so much better than everyone else, just know you’re annoying everyone else in the process. And hurting Mario more than you’ll ever realise.”
And with that, he left 4 dumbfounded. He wasn’t even sure how to react. This GUY trying to lecture him?? What the fuck did he know about life anyways??
He stomped off, far away from everyone as he went back inside. He didn’t want to see anyone then. He needed to see some funny memes. If they could even help him at this point.
Mario noticed this. He felt awful again. Even Puzzles joining back didn’t quite help.
Especially because 4 seemed to have left for good. The silence he left felt louder than anything.
“Dear, are you okay?” Puzzles finally asked him.
Mario couldn’t verbally respond without crying so he just shook his head.
“If… you’re worried about SMG4… I kind of talked to him.”
“Wh… What did you say to him?” Mario asked, though he did tear up in the process.
“Just… something he really needed to hear. A piece of my mind”
“You shouldn’t hurt him… he doesn’t deserve that”
“He WAS hurting you, no?” Puzzles grew a bit frustrated and spoke a bit louder, gaining their friends’ audience.
“Is this about 4?” 3 asked, stepping into it.
“I just.. I told him that he’s hurting Mario with his bullshit.”
“It’s- not-” 
“Yeah, it’s so easy to see! Mario looks miserable ever since 4 started being overprotective” Meggy chimed in.
Mario felt uneasy.
“Guys-”
“Yeah, you guys are right, even I’m upset about it” Luigi joined in after listening for a bit “I’m WELL aware”
“Please just-”
“I’m so sad he’s been causing so much trouble! If only we could all just get along” 
“SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP” Mario broke, scaring everyone.
“Oh, dear…? Are you…”
“You guys are being so mean about Mario’s BEST friend. Sure, he is an asshole but he’s MARIO’S asshole” he got up and left the group, aiming to search for 4, leaving everyone there stunned. Puzzles felt bad.
“I… really thought I was doing the right thing” Puzzles felt guilt wash him over.
“You tried” 3  pat him on his back.
“I just feel like I can’t make things right. Like things won’t ever be perfect”
“Well, with people like us around, it won’t be” 3 tried to be reassuring “but we can try to make it work, you know, love prevails”
“Aww, 3, didn’t know you were giving away advice like this now” Meggy giggled.
3 tried to shush her.
Puzzles smiled at the interaction.
“Is it bad if I need time to  figure out how I can make it work?”
“We’ll be here for you either way” Tari said, stepping beside him.
“Exactly! Cuz what else are friends for?” Luigi joined in.
“Aww you guys” Puzzles could melt “I’ll… really try my best!”
And he got wrapped in a brief group hug. Damn, did it feel nice to have friends!
Meanwhile, Mario was banging on SMG4’s room to no avail, screaming, crying for him to open up. 
“Please….. SMG4…….. This can’t go on… I know Puzzles was a bit mean to you but…. just please talk to me”
“Whatever you want to say you can say without opening the door” 4 said, quietly. It was hard to read his tone.
“I know you’re scared of Mario being tricked into an awful thing but he promises he’s not! If Mr Puzzles wasn’t actually nice he wouldn’t like him as much as he does! Mario knows you want to protect him but still- You shouldn’t feel so much burden over that! Mario doesn’t need you to worry” he was practically crying. He just wanted things to be okay so badly.
He sniffled there for a while.
“Hope you at least tried to understand me” he said, as if hope left him.
And then the world turned awfully quiet for 4. He thought for a while it was nothing. But that nothing really felt like something. As in that something bad could happen, and it could happen right under his nose without him doing anything. 
The anxiety rising in him after a few minutes got the best of him. He finally unlocked the door, even the unlocking felt painfully heavy and slow. He had not time for this shit.
“Mario?” he looked around, seeing no sight of the italian. He grew more worried as he called out again, receiving no response.
He went around in the rooms. He went to check all of them, he was in none of them. Although, something caught his eye about 1 and 2’s room. Something very important. But he wouldn’t go that far… right? Right? 
Okay, now he was REALLY worried as he barged out the door with force that could’ve broken it if it didn’t open so easily as he tried to find any clues where Mario could have gone. This was BAD.
Puzzles could feel it too. He excused himself as he went looking for Mario himself.
As he did, he found 4 first instead.
Puzzles glared at 4. 4 glared at Puzzles.
Time seemed to stop.
After glaring enough both sighed. Which made them look at each other with judgement all over again.
“We should stop this” Puzzles said, begrudgingly. He was holding it back but damn 4 didn’t do much to show he’s good to be around.
“You’re right” 4 sighed, defeated.
“Let’s just… try and find Mario”
“Yeah”
The 2 went on silently, which was the most peaceful they had been around each other.
“You know…” 4 started.
“This isn’t the time”
“I’m just worried over what he might be doing”
“He’s hurt, I know that”
“Duh, idiot”
Puzzles rolled his eyes.
“What do YOU know anyways?”
“He took the godbox piece”
“He did WHAT????”
“I… I noticed it wasn’t in SMG1 and 2’s room anywhere when I looked around to try and find him.”
“Oh my god…”
“Yeah I… god I feel so bad…”
“That’s the first step”
“YOU’ve got nerve”
“SMG4… I get it, you’re jealous, he told me he’d go over to sleep and even cuddle you. I’m… not trying to steal him away”
4 blushed at the mention of it.
“Me? Jealous? No… No I…”
“He IS your best friend so of course you care a lot. I… don’t blame you but you did go too far”
“... I just… can’t help being anxious I guess? It feels like anything can be out to get us at this point…”
“Look… SMG4. I’ll promise you something. I’ll let SMG1 and 2 do all the things and tests to confirm I have no ill will anymore, no godbox manipulation. Don’t you know how it feels? You… become… something else…”
“It’s… scary…”
“I’m sorry if I scared you too”
“Yeah…though, how do you know the fact that the godbox manipulated us before?”
“Sometimes… it’d whisper things. The piece had a faint voice”
“A… A voice??”
“Of course… It would tell me what to do and manipulate my senses to think I’m doing the right thing. It would also tell me some information I could use to my advantage. And sometimes it would utter words I couldn’t connect anywhere. Sometimes I wonder if… the piece itself went insane…”
“That’s… scary I’m… I’m sorry. For… everything these past few days I guess”
“I’ll only accept if you accept me too”
4 stared at Puzzles.
“Maybe after we save Mario from doing something stupid”
They walked for a while. The quiet wasn’t so uncomfortably tense anymore. Puzzles found 4 a lot more likable when he wasn’t swearing at him and staring daggers into him. As they walked they spotted Mario at a cliff, his back turned to them. His arms in front of him, holding the piece. He seemed lost in it.
“Mario!!” Puzzles shouted for him as he and 4 got closer and sped up.
Mario turned a bit too fast, slipping off the edge.
Puzzles and 4 jumped after him with not much thinking. Puzzles caught both of them, utilising his long arms. 4 was too busy fearing death to actually object against it. None of them wanted to die, so badly too. Like a sense of determination crossing across them like electricity, light engulfed all 3 of them, slowly slowing their fall and making them land safely. Though, they barely realised that with how bright and strong the light was. Puzzles noted it was stronger than when he kept Mario back last time. But it felt similar.
As they finally came back to their senses from such an adrenaline inducing fall, 4 picked Mario up, cheering he was saved. But Puzzles did too. And he was taller so with that 4 came too. 4 didn’t mind it much but it did feel weird being lifted up like this. While Mario was SO confused.
“I’m so glad we managed to save you” Puzzles expressed his happiness with words.
“Mario thought he’d die for good”
“Did you want to?” 4 asked.
Mario lowered his head, not answering. But then for a different reason as he looked in his hands, seeing what the piece had become. It went form the pit of darkness it had, turning blindingly bright but still somehow safe to look at. It also seemed to constantly shift in shape. The other 2 looked at it too, just as confused.
“Did we… do this?” Puzzles asked.
“Guess so” 4 replied.
Mario looked at one of them then the other.
“You 2 are not trying to kill each other anymore?”
“We… talked” 4 said “I’m sorry for how I acted, Mario… I really am”
“Mario knows”
“I’m also sorry. Lashing out wasn’t exactly the… best choice I made today”
“You both need therapy”
The 2 laughed.
“We’ll make it work. Somehow” Puzzles reassured Mario, finally putting both of them down.
“And we need to show 1 and 2 what happened to the piece. I don’t know whether they’ll be super excited about it or if they’ll be bummed out they can’t examine it further”
“Probably a bit of both”
“Mario’s…” Mario spoke up, changing the subject “MARIO’S SO HAPPY HIS FAVOURITE PEOPLE ARE GETTING ALONG” he was jumping with joy. It only just fully settled in then.
That was when the others got there.
“You guys are okay??” Meggy was running in the front.
“We were so worried!” Boopkins ran ahead, although he was trying to catch his breath.
“Sure are but” 4 pointed at the piece that changed in Mario’s hands. 
Everyone was shocked, 1 and 2 were in fact so shocked they both fell over. There was a lot to tell and the crew was sure shocked, especially at the fact that 4 and Puzzles talked it out. The piece went back to its rightful place and then they could finally have the few days they’d spend there be chiller. There were still problems but it wasn’t anything the crew couldn’t bear. One could say that they weren’t perfect but they still found integrity.
For now. You know the saying, nothing lasts forever! However for now, things are okay, which was what really mattered.
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zith-ipeth · 3 days
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IM SO READY IM SO READY (Dog Days 7)
Happy weeping beast Wednesday!
Jokes aside, I’m a little choked up, someone showed me how to check followers and like I have a hundred of you guys!!?? In my phone!!??, how is there space the phone is so tiny!!?? Thank you all for joining me on this journey! ALSO ONE WEEK LETS GO! This is actually my like fourth week of college, but one week of updates!
The rain has been getting to me, I forgot how much I love the freedom that comes from my fur not getting wet when I fall over and roll around.
I mentioned my doghood to one of my friends and he was like “yeah I know I’ve heard, keep talking like what’s new?” And that was weird cuase like I mentioned it in passing but the fact he took it seriously kinda rocked a lot!
IM TALKING TO MY WOMEN AND GENDER STUDIES TEACHER TMMRW ABOUT THERIANTHROPY AND GENDER. I’m so excited! I think I have all my talking points done and dusted, but it’ll be weird trying to explain it to a cis allistic person.
Apologies about the lack of photos, I just never got around to taking any fun selfies today :( bit of a bummer but it’s alright! I hope yall don’t mind! I’ll make up for it with the posted picture and a story. Before I explained to my brother that I was a dog, but after I stopped hiding my dog behaviors and started wearing gear, my brother gave me this dog tag on a chain for my 18th birthday. The collar I bought myself, and I’ll only show you the one side (yall don’t need my real name, my silly internet one will do fine). It roughly translates from Latin to…
“To create oneself is to become divine”
Needless to say I cried when he gave it to me I love my brother a lot! He’s such a role model and taught me so much, and the fact that he took my animality, even before I talked to him about it in earnest, so seriously just shows the kind of ally he is.
I’ll make sure to take photos tommorow, I’m gonna try to get myself all done up so I can be hyped for the talk with my professor, thank you all again for sticking with my rambles, and thanks to all yall who asked questions! I love questions! Here’s to a week down, and many more to follow!
Run fast, bite hard, bark loud
Peace, love, and gratitude
-Zith Ipeth
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heartorbit · 2 months
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find another role, carry on the show
#EDIT IT DIDNT SAVE MY TAGS. hey so this post got a thousand notes huh. interesting. surely nothing will change#i'll leave all the old tags. for my thought process. and its kinda funny#take a bow stupid idiot (throws a tomato at them)#in stars and time#isat#siffrin#siffrin no middle names no last name ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧#... or is it. Smiles#i'd like to draw mira for her birthday but um (hasnt open artfight website in a few days) im scared.#also i have NICE ASKS TO ANSWER.... But im scared. give me a minute#Uawaaaaagh i drew this bc i was trying to animate a little bit but it just . Didnt look good. im not good ag 2d animation#tch. ill keep trying cause there ar e way too many songs that and now about isat because i have brain worms. i need amvs.#IM SCARED TO POST THINGS THAT ARE SPOILERY BECAUSE I WANT MY FRIENDS TO PLAY ISAT. BUT.#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#sasasap#sasasa:p#WHAT IS THE PROLOGUES TAG.#tshirt that says 'i <3 killing the image in the mirror and taking its place' on the fromt#and a list of megan thee stallions tour dates on the back. お金稼ぐ俺らはスター#Im kind of tempted to edit this to be the versiom with the eyes. or maybe twt can have that. or. well#all of my friends are on twt (trombone slide sfx) so maybe thats where i should worry about spoilers.#ill see if i want to slap an eyepatch on them in the morning#Im one of those people who was like idgaf about twohats (lets it simmer for a week) Oh my god. Oh my god. Ohmy god#EDIT. i swapped it out for the Eyes version it should be fine as long as its tagged formspoilers right...#ill post eyepatch vers on twt partly bc spoilers but also ppl over there can be .. annoying ..... ....#i fear i would get 800 You Forgot The Eyepatch replies. PLEASE JUST SEE MY VISION.#[BANGING MY HANDS ON THE GLASS] HIS HAND. LIKE IN THE PROLOGUE. WHEN THEYE. HANDS. HELD[EXPLOSION
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hajihiko · 1 year
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Trust and belief and trust and belief and trust and belief and-
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samarecharm · 5 months
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Love being able to write. I can do whatever i want. I can make Ryuji interact w Lala-chan and u literally cant stop me.
#chattin#i feel like shinjuku and crossroads doesnt get enough love#ohya and lala dont get enough love 😭#if they had an option to work there as a parttimer some how my akira wouldve absolutely taken it#u never see the place packed or w customers at all; it just feels cozy every time u go there#akira doesnt have a lot of places free from prying eyes; so id imagine he goes there often to just hang and study#catch up w ohya and get a bit of knowledge and validation from lala#like shes so sweet. i love her. she comes across as wise without being unapproachable#she makes comments she shouldnt (talking about ohyas job and history) bc she just forgot that she shouldnt lol#adamant about not letting him drink while hes there. its like. a safe space for him.#and i think hed like to invite his friends into his safe space; esp ryuji#gets to a point where even ryuji stops by on his own sometimes.#hes got questions but hes always in his head; never says it out loud#but it leads him in the right direction almost all the time#im thinkin of him having like. the most base level internalized homophobia and transphobia#like the kind of shit you just pick up as a child and teen and never question#and u kinda make fun of it bc everyone else is. but akira stumbles into his life and makes it so confusing#like. i dont think hed be trans. but akira would make him second guess alot about himself#about what he likes. what hes into. what hes okay w doing w someone like akira#and lala is like. u got that look in ur eyes kid. come sit.#doesnt entirely get it. but he feels a little lighter. not on labels but on his feelings#‘kid. u think of the ideal person and u think of him. at that point; it dont matter what bits he got.’#and its blunt and MAYBE it gets him a little flustered. but hes always responded well to blunt words. no beating around the bush#makes his brain confront shit head on without the second guessing hed suffer through when left on his own#WAA. rambling.#gonna see if i can draft this up at some point
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maybege · 2 months
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btw i am still alive now that i have recovered from swiftkirchen and i hope you are all doing super well this summer! i am FLYING through my reading list atm which is amazing and i am feeling more and more inspired for things (footballer!paz anyone? roommate!paz as well maybe?) so hmu in the inbox it is TIME TO THIRST
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ichorblossoms · 2 months
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oh shit yeah grimm and yarrow are exes to lovers huh
#tbf i don't rly think of my writing in tropes. even then exes to lovers doesn't cross my mind as often as friends- or enemies- to lovers#as in it's like. slightly less common? idfk i don't pay all that much attention to that. it's also not a trope i inherently jump at as#someone who personally does not find the thought of getting back with an ex remotely appealing#however. when my characters are stupid about these things...#i think it didn't cross my mind bc they don't. formally break up so i kinda forgot they're technically exes at the beginning of p2#it's like 'i need to fucking book it bc i killed a guy and his guys want my head for that but i'll come back [doesn't do that for. five#years and mostly comes back bc they're out of options]' not 'it's fucking over' yknow?#their relationship by the end of p1 is kind of funky though. it's absolutely romantic in nature but grimm is. kind of a mess bc it's got#this tension of wanting to simultaneously get close to someone and not let them in so the two of them actually don't get all that far?#they're both too afraid to have sex about it that's for sure#i'm not even sure what they call their relationship at that point either. for grimm's sake i don't think they'd really call it anything#in essence it ends with a lot of broken promises that weren't quite promises yknow?#if grimm hadn't booked it i think eventually the two of them might've sorted out their shit but also there's a v high chance grimm would've#fucked things over for good. actually now that i think about it they probably would have run off at some other point#i also think it's important for yarrow's development that grimm fucked off. gotta add some bitterness to that mixture there#you see the five years between p1 and p2 are essential for character development. they gotta marinate in who the fuck they are#make themselves a bit better. make themselves a bit worse. date someone else for a year or so. as it goes#i'm fully rambling here but. what the fuck ever that's what this blog is for#at all times i want to talk about my characters. i only occasionally find a way to make it into a post#grimmyarrow
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kaykoko · 10 months
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I finally finished Dungeon Meshi!!! Very fun read and amazing charaters!! The hype i have for the anime now is unreal!
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sysig · 2 years
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Some more Just Desserts pets, and thinking about Candy Mers again (Patreon)
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Also ft. the pigeon study I did, what a cute bird!
#Doodles#Just Desserts#Been thinking about the JD pets a lot lately actually I'd really like to make a size chart sometime#But honestly a lot of it was motivated by thinking of a pet to give Cherry Shortcake - a merengue pigeon!#I know I love birds and really enjoy drawing birds but I honestly wasn't expecting to have so much fun and be as pleased as I am haha#What a cute! Love that ♪#She doesn't have a name or an ADS chart yet but she does have the appearance upgrade so she's won at least a couple battles lol#She's a plain no-bean vanilla merengue but Cherry Shortcake opted to make her matching so she's got a cherry ''filling'' on her chest#To mimic bleeding-heart pigeons! It's very cute and highly symbolic lol#She is cute ♪#Then a pet idea I had months ago but never got around to because I lost the inspiration source! D:#I swear I saw a YouTube thumbnail at one point of a very chubby rain frog that looked like a mochi lol but I can't find it ;; I've looked!#But it's still an adorable idea so mochi frog hehe#And then the Candy Mer stuff ♪ I legit forgot I'd called them Candy Mers and not just mercandies at one point lol#Both of the links are related because it's more worldbuilding - the second one is kind of more relevant? But it all is so#I mentioned very briefly about mercandy death at one point but never elaborated because it made me sad haha#Still true but I thought about it a bit more! About the ''natural springs'' part - once a body of water is fully saturated with sugar -#The sugar-breakdown of a mercandy's body changes from a complete breakdown to a partial breakdown - little pieces slough off and float up#Once they fill with air they turn into gummy aquatic life or - ''jelly fish'' hehehehe ♪ Which is how natural fish occur!#Depending on how big a mercandy is before she dies her body may turn into a whole school! The shape and texture is random tho haha
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Okay I think I’m back in a bit of Lane Kim era. I have not been here long and I’ve been given The Great Controversy another book, 1 magazine, 2 booklets, 16+ pamphlets, and a faith counselor.
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yuelun · 1 year
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Alright, little thoughts/headcanons/reminders that will be expanded upon in separate posts in the future, but:
— By all accounts, we know that Guizhong's actual name is Haagentus, this is likely the same to 'Morax' and 'Osial'. Guizhong, keeping in mind that this is what the adepti seem to refer to her as and they also refer to Morax as Rex Lapis (which is the title given to him by the mortals?); I'm tempted to believe that it was given to her by the mortals as well. Granted, this is heartbreaking to think about as Guizhong in Chinese is 归终, of which 归 translates to 'to return' and 终 'to end'. Yep, we all return to dust in the end— yeah, I hate HoYo too. 😭
— She's a bit of a pain in the neck. I say this affectionately, but you need two hands to deal with her. Based on Echoes of the Heart and the quest A Single Harmony for an Irreplaceable Soul, we learn that she's rather competitive, she has no qualms about standing her ground, she tends to push boundaries a little socially even if apparently endearingly enough so (CR: "(...) no matter what nonsense she said, one never felt bothered or offended."), she is very determined (her little tongue as she's working on the Cleansing Bell thrills me so very much) and opinionated/stubborn. Granted, all of this seems to come paired with a certain eloquence and kind air as she was referenced as having been well loved by mortals and adepti alike, as all still speak very sorrowfully even 3700(ish) years after her passing.
— She's very hands-on, she touches everything— she simply experiences life through touch, if you will. As an engineer, she touches to find out how things feel, how they operate. This is, in my opinion, further substantiated by her attire. She's the least clothed of all of the gods and adepti, she's also the only one who's actively shown to always be barefoot. So while I can see this as an entirely standalone aesthetic decision, HoYo is so thorough, so I think there's more to it. So along with being an engineer and what that can imply, I think that the intention of how exposed she is and the specific places where this is a fact (her back, her legs), plays into stimulants. The wind, water, the sun, warmth, the cold, everything is experienced through one's skin, the best way to experience 'mortal life', is to experience the little things that make life... life. This is something you'll see me play a lot into in threads.
#[ mini study. ] she always sought to make everyone happy and one must say: she had quite the gift for it.#[ i literally had more planned but then i got distracted on multiple occasions (i also forgot to use up my resin)... ]#[ and also it's 4:30am and so my brain has wandered off. ]#[ but i'll add more-- and also i'll elaborate on these as time passes. but i wanted those three out. ]#[ because i know before echoes of the heart/lantern rite 2023 happened; there was a bit of a different... perspective of her. ]#[ gentle. very sweet-- and all of that still remains to an extent. but i like the additions they gave her. ]#[ as a friend of mine affectionately put it once; 'i like that she's super sweet but also a little shit' 😂 but it's true. ]#[ but hoyo kind of showed that. ]#[ when she's opposite cloud retainer and morax in EotH? she's so... 'proud' isn't quite right but i'll use it for now. ]#[ when the obscuro vulpes 'wins'-- she's so excited. she's thrilled. she loves to win. ]#[ but it's endearing. like cloud retainer literally says it too. ]#[ on at least two occasions. ]#[ when she stands opposite of ping? hands on her hips. she's challenging her. she's stubborn. ]#[ i /love/ those additions. they make her oddly human for a god. and i love that considering how they ingrained her into liyue. ]#[ and what she represents (the arc of multiple of them going to live among the mortals as she once did. ]#[ but any way. yes. hello. ]#[ also i have so much more to say about her name; but it's saddening because if you think about the fact that 'guili' likely comes from...#[ partly her name and then morax'. so because then it's like... she had her civilization before the guili assembly. ]#[ and was said to have been adored by her people; if they learned she was the god of 'dust'-- her name makes perfect sense. ]#[ but then god; the name of the plains becomes increasingly depressing. ]#[ like we know canonically she herself refers to them as the plains of returning and departing but man. talk about mortality. ]#[ talk about the stupid pain that's linked to a god bearing a name that is inherently linked to... death. 'the end'. ]#[ while gods are supposed to be immortal. heck; they still say 'gods never die'. that's depressing. ]#[ it's fine. i'm fine. ]#[ hi guys; i tag ramble too much. welcome. <3 ]
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simpletoymaker-a · 2 years
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sirfrogsworth · 2 months
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How do you take a photo of time?
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I've been watching the track events at the Olympics since I was a wee lad. It was a tradition in our family. We'd gather around our ancient low-definition 19 inch CRT television and watch tiny blobs compete against other tiny blobs and root for our country.
It was a bit like watching YouTube on your phone in 144p.
Several heroes emerged.
Jackie Joyner-Kersee was amazing.
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You can't forget about Flo-Jo.
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And then the Olympics decided NBA players were allowed in the competition.
Which formed... The Dream Team.
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Was this fair?
Well... they won each game by an average of 44 points.
So... no. It was not fair.
Though it became more fair as time went on.
But, umm... yeah. The other teams looked like the Washington Generals and the US looked like the Harlem Globetrotters if they stopped screwing around half of the game.
But my absolute favorite Olympian was a runner named Michael Johnson.
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He was cool as heck.
For one thing... gold shoes.
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But he also had this crazy, upright, Tom Cruise-ish sprinting style that just made him look like a running robot on the track.
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And in the 1996 Atlanta games he just trounced EVERYONE. I mean, it wasn't even close.
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Yikes. Those losing blobs are probably really embarrassed.
Last night I decided to invigorate my nostalgia and watch the track events again. And I got to see one of the wildest races in history.
It didn't even last 10 seconds but it was one of the most exciting sporting events I've ever witnessed. Almost every runner won the race.
After I saw that initially, I was like... who the heck won???
Even in slow motion I wasn't sure.
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This was one of the closest finishes in history. There has never been a race where all 8 runners were within this margin.
The arena was silent as the winner was being confirmed. The runners just kind of paced around waiting for official word. My best guess was the Jamaican runner, Kishane Thompson. But then the loudspeaker announced Noah Lyles.
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The last tiny morsel of American pride burst out of me with a big "Wooooo!"
I forgot what it was like to be proud of my country. I wish it happened more often. But this young man, despite being last place in the first 3rd of the race, turned on the afterburners and won in a photo finish.
And that's when my inner nerd took over.
Because when they showed the photo finish image, it looked super weird.
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Why is the track white?
Why do all of the runners look all warpy like that QWOP game?
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So I went down a research rabbit hole to figure this out.
Photo finishes are actually fascinating. The first photo finish captured the end of a horse race in 1890. But that was mostly luck and timing. The actual photo finish mechanisms weren't used until 1937.
Originally they would film the finish line through a physical slit.
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And the first horsie head that appeared in that slit would be the winner. This technology ended a huge aspect of corruption in horse race fixing almost overnight.
But we have come a long way since then. And I'd like to introduce you to the Omega Scan 'O' Vision Ultimate.
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This slow motion camera sits fixed on the finish line of every race. The concept of the photo finish has remained remarkably similar to the 1930s approach. The camera sensor is specially designed to only record a vertical slit.
Only the finish line itself is actually captured.
And because it limits what it records to only that slit, it can capture 40,000 frames per second to get amazing temporal resolution.
So why don't the photo finishes just look like, well... this?
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That is because the camera takes a picture of time more-so than dimensional space. I guess it would be more accurate to say it *assembles* a picture of time.
As the runners cross the finish line, the camera combines all of the little strips of pictures into a single image.
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It's almost like if you tried to reassemble a piece of paper after it had been shredded.
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Imagine each strip of paper is a picture of ONLY the finish line, just at a slightly different point in time.
What if someone stopped on the finish line and didn't move... what would that look like?
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Once they got there, the same part of their body would just be repeated.
So the right side of the photo finish picture represents earlier in time and it just assembles the image strip by strip as time passes and you literally get a picture of time itself.
NEAT!
Okay, but how do they determine the winner from the photo finish?
I mean, that shoe looks like it is ahead of Noah Lyles!
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Clavicles!
The IAFF rules state the foremost part of the torso must cross the finish line first. And the endpoint of the torso is the outer end of the clavicle.
So if you get this bone across the finish line first, you win the race.
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Two more fun facts!
The start of the race is actually just as carefully timed as the end of the race. There are sensors in the starting blocks of each runner.
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The starting gun also has an electronic sensor.
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They have determined the fastest a human can react to the sound of a gun is roughly 100 milliseconds. So if you start running before 100 milliseconds they know you didn't actually hear the gun, you just got antsy and started running too early.
And the final fun fact...
Did you notice the Omega logo at the top of the photo finish?
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That isn't superimposed or added after the fact. That is captured by the camera.
But if this image is composed only of tiny little slivers, how did they get the Omega logo to show up?
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That is a little display. And it is synchronized with the Scan 'O' Vision Ultimate to show a little sliver of the Omega logo for each frame captured.
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So when the final image is stitched together, it looks like a cohesive logo at the top of the photo.
Pretty clever, Omega!
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(About Thirst by Marina Yuszczuk)
I finally go to read one of the books I got from the pride market and it was billed as like a sapphic vampire love story and I am SCREAMING!! It’s like??? I guess?? Technically???? I went online to go see what people were saying and people keep talking about things in the book that just??? Aren’t a thing??? What is happening did I miss something 😭
#oni talks#thoughts#thirst book#Marina Yuszczuk#side note autocorrect has been FIGHTING ME EVERY SECOND FOR ME TO TYPE THIS NAME I S2FG#sapphic books#Oni vents#like I feel like I’m going crazy??? ppl are talking about this as if it’s like sapphic twilight or as if it’s some super feminist book#and I’m just here like girl where??? EXACTLY WHAT SPECIFICALLY ABOUT THIS IS FEMINIST AT ALL??? (as a feminist myself and not the terf kind)#like everywhere I go ppl are talking about the book like it’s the most lesbian feminist thing and/or talking about the book as if like thing#things are happening that are just??? factually not?? like did yall just pause and go read fanfic and forgot where the fanfic and book ended#is there some big huge thing in regards to this book that I’m missing??? this was supposed to just be a book I consumed while I waited for#stuff to charge so I could listen to a different book and do the dishes but NO! THE ENDING IS SO FRUSTRATING#this book actively frustrates me coz like there’s parts I do enjoy and like and there’s bits of a story in it but it’s like the book doesn’t#even wanna BE a book? like towards the latter half it feels like the writer just wanted to be done already#feels like we’re missing half a book or like it’s 2 VERY different books that don’t mesh well#also there’s so much set up and for like??? nothing? or is it just me and my potential rot brain where I’m just like overly excited#and see all the cool stuff they COULD HAVE done but NOOOO#also like?? stuff just happens? it doesn’t really feel like a concrete story with like proper fulfillment or arcs#it’s basically just oh so yeah thing happened so anyway and then this happened anyway#I know I don’t read a ton but are we this starved for sapphic books that yall just overhyped the sapphic stuff or am I just a unique#anecdotal case?? like? idk I got more books & now I’m scared to read them but I also want a different sapphic vampire book but that was the#only one I got coz it was like a big pride market and the book place was one of the first stalls and I didn’t wanna carry like a ton of book#I am so tempted to go to the queer bookstore nearby to find more sapphic vampire to FULFILL MY CRAVING THAT WAS LEFT UNFULFILLED#like it was sold as this big sapphic romance but I swear it’s like that’s barely any of the book?? the other romances get way more???#am I just reading a completely different book or something????
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the-best-bagel · 4 months
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free roaming outdoor dogs a la cats are not a good idea and are just asking for injuries and conflict but unfortunately i've only ever had great experiences growing up in a neighborhood with a handful of those dogs and i miss themmmmm
#there was this one huge golden named riley whod just lay in the road all day and make cars go around him#he'd find me and my sister and we'd fuck around all day with him#on halloween he'd follow us trick or treating#he was dumb as bricks and completely unbothered by either of our reactive ass gsd mixes we'd invite him in to hang play with them#and when he'd had enough he'd politely wait by the gate to be let out#there was also cocoa he was some kind of aussie mix#he stayed by his house mostly and people watched but he'd always come say hi and walk around this undeveloped lot ppl wore a trail into#he was also good with our reactive dog#there were three? yellow labs that would come around too.#one had giant balls and would walk around with a tennis ball looking for ppl to play fetch with#there was also a younger one i dont remember well and an ancient old girl who just liked being pet#i forgot to mention riley would also find my sister and i in the mornings to wait for the bus with us#when i was in highschool there was a husky for a few days id see in the mornings#he probably just got out on accident lol but he was nice too#i like to think im good at reading dog body language and respecting boundaries but i have zero fear of strange dogs ever#i've only ever been close to being bit once and it was as a mailman#a little pittie jumped a fence from its backyard when i started up to a porch and came right up to me barking and growling#literally on my hand like i felt teeth while it barked it just didnt bite#i just stood there and a few seconds later the owner came out and i very slowly and smoothly handed them their package#as this fucking dog told me to gtfo#that shook me up a bit lol i got very lucky#every other dog i met was lovely though#idk what the point of this post is i just have a soft spot for driveway dogs#do not let ur dog do this though same as outdoor cats
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inbabylontheywept · 12 days
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the house i grew up in was a little bit of a fixer upper. for the first 19 years, my dad just sort of slowly fixed it, but pretty early on in college, he came into a large amount of cash and decided to just do the whole thing at once. so he rented a different house for like, 2 months that was just a block down from us, and then got a bunch of contractors to fix original house ASAP. it was kind of crazy, but it compressed many years of work into like, three months.
the sitting in a new house for three months was actually pretty fun. and i shouldnt really complain at all (staying at home while in college is a sweet deal)
but.
but. my parents are fairly hard of hearing, and their bedroom in the old house was in the furthest possible annex from everyone else. wheras in the rental it was just in the middle of the house. so without going into details, i was extremely aware that my parents were having sex like, eight times a day. my dad had just retired and i guess they were celebrating, which is great i guess, having parents that really like each other is way better than the alternative, but also, it did make me envy their deafness. i kept headphones on for so long that year i got literal ear calluses.
at the same time, the house my buddy from the shoe incident grew up in flooded. turbo flooded. they burst like, two pipes at once and the damage was so severe they had to redo all the flooring and all the drywall. his family actually had homeowners insurance, which is either incredible or suspicious for a family that used the drained pool in their backyard to store rusty scrap metal. so insurance was handling the work, but in the meantime, they were crammed into a very small hotel room space. we did the math on it then, it averaged about 80 square feet a person.
so one day i got home, and i was chilling, and then six rolled around, and apparently six o'clock was sex o'clock because my parents decided to flex their cardio. i grabbed my headphones and prayed that god would do for me what he did for beethoven, but that failed to work, and then seven rolled around and my parents were still at it, which again, very impressive, but was pushing me to swap out judas for mozart in those prayers. there's a definitive point where you stop praying to be deaf and instead pray that god could take you to a nice field and pop you like a gore-balloon.
i was about five minutes away from that point when my friend called me and basically said i have been stuck in a 500 square foot space with 6 people and i didn't have many marbles to start but what few i had are gone. please. if we are friends, if we were ever friends, take me out of here just for a moment.
and i was still pretty mad at him, but i had pity on the poor guy. also helped that i was desperate to leave the house. so i drove the chickenshitmobile to the hotel and i picked him up, and then we did our normal hangout activity, which was go to food city and buy produce. his normal house was, on a good day, nasty, and his backyard was, as i stated before, mostly used to store mosquito larvae and rusty metal, so what we'd always done before was just walk to the grocery store a half block away and leer at vegetables.
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so we did that and it was like old times again. they had some radishes that were expired, so i could buy like, literally an entire grocery bag of them for about $5. so i did. i really like radishes. he got a coconut because he liked fruit and beating things with hammers.
which probably would've been great except we didn't have a hammer, so instead we spent about 30 minutes stomping itike it owed us money. when it finally cracked we cheered like we just got the winning touchball at the superdome and then he ate some of the flesh, and i ate some of the radishes, and we admired the black, starless sky of the city before i took him back to his hotel room.
and then we got pulled over.
i forgot to turn my lights on because the street all around the food city was ludicrously well lit. so it went from being pretty bright, to pretty bright and flashy, then i pulled into a parking lot and a cop came to ask us for IDs which is where everything went to shit:
i’d forgotten my license at home. 
the cop was was actually kind of chill about it - he said he could get by with just an address. except i did not know my address. i hadn't memorized the new one yet. so i told the cop, my house is getting remodeled, i don't know my address right now. and then he went to my friend, and my friend said the exact same thing. house getting remodeled, staying somewhere else, no address, sowwwwwwy.
now the cop genuinely didn't know what to do. he went back to his car, and i was stressed that i was about to get into HUGE trouble so i started eating the radishes and my buddy started eating more of his coconut, and we actually managed to eat like a quarter of both before the cop came back. we ate enough produce that he could smell something weird in the air, and he asked what the smell was, and i said radishes, and my buddy said coconut, and the cop said which, and then we produced a large bag of droopy radishes and an absolutely brutalized coconut, and the cop was just like
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so my buddy tried explaining how he was sharing a 500 square foot apartment with 6 people and wanted a fruit he could fight with power tools, and i tried explaining how i'd actually tried buying my parents like, board games and puzzles and stuff but nothing worked - the only thing my parents seemed to like doing right now was each other, and we both went on long enough and pathetically enough that the cop eventually went:
ok. stop.
and we stopped.
and he said do you know why i pulled you over?
and i said, because of my headlights, and my friend (who is hispanic) and the cop both looked at me like like i was the dumbest person in the entire world. and then the cop said no. that's why i'm allowed to pull you over. i checked your car because this neighborhood has a terrible sex trafficking problem, and i pull over every car i can to make sure no one is buying or selling sex. and you two are obviously doing neither. now i could give you, like, four tickets right now, but that would do nothing to make this area safer, so just turn your lights on, go home, drive safe, and try to be less stupid in the future.
and i said okay but i was thinking, you know, damn, this is just how i live man, i don't have a hidden third gear i can shift into. people can't just get smarter because it would be convenient. it's always convenient to be smart. i am literally trying my best.
but i didn't say anything because i was, slowly, learning how to filter what i said. instead i nodded and the cop left then i dropped my buddy off, and the last thing he said was said he owed me for responding to his SOS. I said he owed me for a lot of things, and he agreed that was true. then i drove home with my lights on, 5 under the speed limit, and arrived to a peaceful quiet home. I could’ve wept with relief but instead I went to bed.
the relief was short lived. i was woken up at 6 am by my parents. i swore, and then i prayed, and when i did not explode, i swore again. then i got up to make breakfast before my first class.
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