#i love michelle since buffy

[thepunkmuppet]

idk about anyone else but I would’ve LOVED to see at least one substantial interaction between angel and dawn, or even angelus and dawn. because I feel like we all forget that angel had a little sister, who looked to be around dawn’s age (considering dawn would’ve been 10-13 years old during seasons 1-3). and he murdered her.

I imagine him being extremely awkward around dawn, unsure of what to do or how to behave, with moments of awkward but genuine tenderness that really show how much he would have loved his sister when he was alive. he probably would feel unsafe around her, and guilty, seeing her as an everyday reminder of what he did and feeling like a danger to her even though he knows he would never hurt her, not wanting to get close to her or touch her. buffy would likely bring this up, making it a plot point for an episode that ended in angel and dawn having an emotional reconciliation, wherein perhaps she tells him that he’s not that person anymore, and she doesn’t see him that way or feel threatened by him. which would then hit really hard when he turns into angelus, making her kind of hate him in season 3 which would explain the way she speaks about him from season 5 onwards… UGH it’s just so good

it’s just fascinating to me, and shocking that we never got any kind of flashback to delve into this (I get it would’ve been hard because michelle trachtenberg certainly does not look 10 or 12, but still). because every character in the buffyverse who was around from seasons 1-4 remembers everything completely differently to what we see on screen. as far as they’re concerned, dawn was there, deeply entrenched in all their lives. I think since reading “green smoke and empty mirrors” (by apprenticebard on ao3, best fanfic ever written istg everyone go read it right now) I’ve thought about this much more. thinking of making a fic about dawn and angel one day, because the potential is INSANE

[pzyii]

drawing/explanation of buffy and/or dawn summers scars/design? i love ur willow and i want to know how u think abt buffy & dawn

ah thank youuu!!! I love to talk designs so I will do my best, I haven5 done any refrence sheet with either of them and def have less hcs cause well willow is the center of my brain but I do very much have thoughts. (I’ve got a criminally low amount of Dawn drawings despite the fact she’s my second favourite character)

doing a lil cut off cause it’s prob gonna be a lot of text, warning self harm mention at the Dawn part!!!

so starting with buffy. Some little details include that I draw her with moles cause they’re pretty and I like having more texture on the skin when I draw it, I draw her with a tooth gap cause it’s cute and fun, aswell as curly hair cause she has it every now and then but mainly cause I loveeeee drawing curly hair aswell as bc my bf has curly hair and buffy makes me think of her so yeah :) as well as shark bites every now and then bc of the same reason. I loveee drawing her with bandanas as well as whatever those things she wears in the drawing below are called.

Onto scars I don’t have many that specific ones. I don’t have her like injuries as memorized as I do willows and also yk slayer healing. Face scars I only really draw her with one, that being an eyebrow scar she got after getting a piercing in s4 that IMMEDIATELY got ripped out on patrol (willow took care of it, Joyce didn’t even have time to panic over the piercing before having the scar as her whole new problem)

i often draw her with scars on her knuckles cause punching and/or bandaids on them and her fingers, the bandaids on her fingers are also partly cause well splinters, preventory measure. I often draw her with bandages and bandaids on the rest of her body too. They aren’t often that needed or needed for a long time but still, keeping the wounds from infection.

other than that i tend to give her the scar from when she was shot in seeing red (tho im thinking about making it like, look less like a normal scar since it was healed with like, really strong dark magic). And then just small and big random scars that don’t really have specific connections (she can’t herself remember when she got most of them. Too many fights. Too many scars, they become insignificant, but there's still too many, she knows that much)

as you can probably notice I loveee enhancing Buffys childish whimsy cause she lost a lot of her more so teenage years than childhood-childhood and I like to let her just breathe

Onto Dawn, my dearest, everyone’s little sister.

she has a tooth gap just like her sister as well as mini mini canine looking teeth like some people (Michelle trachtenberg included) have.

draw her hair mostly straight but I’d probably say it’s at least wavy, I at least used to draw her with vitiligo and Marie Antoinette syndrome and I’m not sureee about that head-canon anymore but I still like it, so it’s 50-50

she also has freckles!!!!

For scars I really don’t have much check on canon injuries with her but I’ve got some

She has scars from when glory opened/tried to open the portal in the gift, it serves as a reminder of what happened also logically speaking she’d just simply probably keep those scars

she still has her scar from blood ties, but other than that I hc that she’s had a continued problem with sh so therefore just like with willow, she has multiple sh scars on mainly her arms.

Her eyes stares into your soul so bad. Get contact lenses /j

[michellemisfit]

Tag Game Tuesday

Thanks to @celestialmickey for coming up with the fun. Thanks for the tag @tanktopgallavich @deedala @mikhailoisbaby @heymrspatel @lingy910y @thepupperino @energievie

Name: Michelle (or Lady Farmer according to a small child on the yard today lol)

Age: Never quite got past 27 in my mind 🤟

How many hours of sleep did you get last night? 5 hours. 1am-4am and 5.30am-7.30am

Tumblr mobile or desktop? 100% mobile. Which means that I can’t copy and paste all the questions for these games at once, I have to copy and paste them one line at a time, or just type them from scratch.

A hobby you’d like to pick up? I’ve been invited to go axe throwing and I’ve just been so busy and tired I’ve not had a chance to go. So that, I guess? lol

If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Cassis

What was your average screen time last week? 9 hours 33 minutes 🤷🏽‍♂️

A song you put on every playlist? There isn’t one. My playlists are ‘Chill, Baby Girl’, ‘Driving’, ‘Feral Hours 😏’, ‘Cape Cod Tunes’, ‘Gym 💪’, ‘King and Lionheart’, ‘MICK MILK 🤟’, ‘IAN GALL 😎’, and ‘🎶🎶🎶🎶’ - You name me a song that can go on all of those playlists, I dare you!

Having said that, everyone should have Frightened Rabbit on one of their playlists!

Favourite holiday? … May Half Term? It’s generally nice and sunny without being crazy hot yet. It’s shearing time, which is mad, but fun. There’s generally baby animals about and flowers are in bloom. What’s not to like?

Something on your bucket list: Bungee Jumping.

You’re invited to a costume party, what are you dressing up as? What aren’t I dressing up as?? I’ve got two large under the bed drawers. One is dedicated to art & craft supplies, the other one is costumes.

Arthur Pendragon is always fun (horse sold separately). Jessie from Toy Story is the CUTEST (though I’d have to get new doll contact lenses).

And then there was the year Ruth and I went to NY Comic Con with 3 matching cosplays from 3 different shows.

Spike & Willow (Buffy), Eleanor Guthrie & Anne Bonny (Black Sails), and Jace & Clary (Shadowhunters). That was good fun!

What show takes up the most space in your brain? Right now it’s counting down the days until I can watch Season 2 of The Bear!!! 😬😬

And finally, share something you’re looking forward to: Going to Cape Cod in September. I’ve not been able to go since before the pandemic and I miss it! Also Ruth and I are planning another recording junket up North, that’s always fun. And then end of this year or early next year Ruth and I are going to (hopefully) see the Northern Lights. So lots to look forward to <3

I’m late in the day so sorry if you’ve already been tagged a million times! @creepkinginc @lupeloto @grumble-fish @grossmickey @gardenerian @sluttymickey @sleepyfacetoughguy @look-i-love-u @rereadanon @crossmydna @mmmichyyy @takeyourpillsbitchh @deedala @harrowhark-a-vagrant @francesrose3 @too-schoolforcool @whatthebodygraspsnot @captainjowl

[blind-rats]

The Quiet Misogyny of “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”

When accusations that Joss Whedon, creator of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, abused his power on multiple sets, few fans of his work seemed surprised. According to actor Charisma Carpenter, who had a recurring lead role as Cordelia Chase on Buffy and starred in its spinoff series Angel, Whedon created a toxic work environment and repeatedly harassed her on set. In a statement posted across the actress’s social media accounts, Carpenter revealed that the traumatizing experience of working with Whedon caused her anxiety and a chronic physical condition that she still struggles with today.

Carpenter’s statement comes directly on the heels of WarnerMedia’s investigation into workplace misconduct allegations levied against Whedon after he was hired as a replacement director on Justice League (2017) following Zack Snyder’s departure. In July 2020, actor Ray Fisher, who played Cyborg and worked with Whedon during post production on the film and its subsequent reshoots, wrote on Twitter, “[Whedon’s] on set treatment of the cast and crew of Justice League was gross, abusive, unprofessional, and completely unacceptable.” As a show of support for Fisher, Carpenter revealed that she had participated in WarnerMedia’s investigation, stating, “Despite my fear about its impact on my future, I can no longer remain silent. This is overdue and necessary. It is time.” 

In December 2020, WarnerMedia shared that they had concluded the investigation and claimed they had taken “remedial action.” Prior to the investigation’s conclusion, Whedon voluntarily stepped down from his role as showrunner for the upcoming WarnerMedia-owned HBO series, The Nevers, due to the pandemic, so it remains unclear what so-called remedial action was actually taken against him.

The allegations against the director and former Hollywood sweetheart—or whatever the male nerd equivalent of that is—span nearly the entirety of his onscreen career. While some fans of Whedon may struggle to understand how a man whose work has been lauded for its depiction of Strong Female CharactersTM and themes of empowerment could perpetuate the abuse he outwardly condemned, other fans were less shocked. 

In addition to accusations by Whedon’s ex-wife Kai Cole, who wrote a scathing essay for the Wrap in 2017 about her ex-husband’s faux feminism and predatory affairs, rumors have swirled for years about Carpenter’s untimely departure from Angel. However, feminists who are familiar with Whedon’s shows, including Buffy, Firefly, and Dollhouse, as well as his first two Avengers films, have long-since recognized the quiet (and not-so-quiet) misogyny directly embedded within his filmography. 

To understand Whedon’s nerdy repackaging of entitlement toward women and their bodies, one must look no further than the subtext of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, the series that initially launched him to success.

During Buffy’s seven-season run from 1997 to 2003, and even still today, comedic sidekick Xander Harris (Nicholas Brendon) became a frequent target of feminist ire. There are countless think pieces, forums, blog posts, and Reddit threads dedicated to fans’ burning hatred of the character, and the show’s insistence on framing him as morally correct when he’s quite clearly in the wrong. From the very first episode, Xander is positioned as the “nice guy” of the friend group—the wisecracking, lovable nerd who reads X-Men comics and doesn’t get a second glance from most women. 

As the everyman, Xander caters to an audience of men and boys who might relate to his average looks, inability to entice women, and his literal powerlessness up against the superpowered women he fights alongside. His friends and allies have varying degrees of usefulness in the fight to protect Sunnydale, which sits on a demon hellmouth: Buffy Summers (Sarah Michelle Gellar), Xander’s best friend and unrequited love interest, is imbued with vampire slaying abilities, and Willow Rosenberg (Alyson Hannigan), his other best friend and briefly-requited love interest, has ’90s-esque computer hacking skills and eventually becomes a powerful witch. Additionally, at any given time, he is surrounded by allies that range from friendly vampires and ex-demons to superstrong government soldiers and werewolves.

In any room he’s in, Xander is never the strongest, smartest, bravest, best looking, or even the most charming—he is utterly average in every way. In an early Season 1 episode, Xander sums up his character archetype perfectly when he says, “I laugh in the face of danger. Then I hide until it goes away.” Despite Xander’s mediocrity and inherent powerlessness in comparison to the women he surrounds himself with, one of his key character traits is his sexual entitlement. He regularly makes references to his perpetual horniness and sexualizes almost every beautiful woman he encounters. 

When he first meets Buffy, he immediately develops a crush on her, and despite her repeated rejections over the course of several seasons, he continues to wait for an opportunity to be with her. Xander pining over his best friend might not necessarily make him bad, but it’s concerning that he also harbors resentment toward every guy Buffy dates or shows interest in, occasionally even lashing out at her for daring to choose other men over him.

Worse, he views himself as a “nice guy” who is entitled to sexual and romantic relationships with the beautiful women he fawns over. Except Xander isn’t really a nice guy at all—his entire self-identification as a nice guy isn’t actually supported by his interpersonal relationships or behavior, and in fact, is often directly contradicted by them. 

Interestingly, Xander doesn’t simply act as a stand-in for sexually frustrated nerd boys in the audience who want to fuck women like Buffy; he is also, quite literally, Whedon’s self-insert character. Fans of the show had initially speculated about this, and Whedon confirmed it when he was interviewed by NPR in 2000, stating, “Xander is obviously based on me.” This was also reconfirmed during a panel at the 2011 Emerald City Comic Con when actor James Marsters, who played the vampire Spike, said, “[Xander] is Joss. That’s the way he sees himself.” As Buffy fans gain a clearer picture of Whedon’s behavior behind the scenes, it’s ironic that a man with a track record of abusing his power over women and people of color on set would align himself with a character whose primary character trait is powerlessness. 

Why does a director and showrunner who weaponizes his power over his cast members to control them—and in the case of Charisma Carpenter, attempt to literally control her body and reproductive choices by pressuring her to get an abortion—get to hide behind a fictional facade of helplessness? Because he likes comics and wasn’t popular with girls in high school? Perhaps the most unlikely indictment of Whedon comes from the series itself, in a Season 6 arc that flips the concept of the harmless nerdy misogynist on its head. In the sixth season of Buffy—which notably featured the least involvement from Whedon, as he stepped down to an executive producing role to focus on other projects—a new group of villains called the Trio is introduced. The Trio features three socially inept, Star Wars-loving and comic book-obsessed boys who attempt to neutralize Buffy and take over Sunnydale. The group of seemingly harmless nerds evolves into a major threat over the course of the season.

After creating a mindless sex robot and being dumped by his girlfriend Katrina (Amelinda Embry), Warren Mears (Adam Busch), the leader and most malicious member of the group, creates a device to render his ex-girlfriend into a state of submission so he can force her to be his sex slave. However, before he is able to rape her, the device malfunctions, and when she tries to escape, Warren hits her over the head with a champagne bottle and kills her. Later in the season, Warren also fatally shoots Tara, a fan favorite and one of the few queer women characters in the series. 

Despite their inability to adhere to a traditionally idealized version of smooth-talking and muscled masculinity, the Trio’s proximity to nerd culture does not exempt them from causing harm. In fact, their self-identification as geeky underdogs is what provides them cover and their desire to acquire social power is what fuels their violence.

In an oft-cited acceptance speech for the “Men on the Front Lines” award presented by Equality Now, Whedon recalled a common question he received from reporters: “So, why do you write these strong female characters?” In response, he said, “Because you’re still asking me that question.” 

Though the response offers an empowering sentiment and makes for a highly quotable soundbite, he betrays his real motivations for writing fictional women within the same speech. He says, “When I created Buffy, I wanted to create a female icon, but I also wanted to be very careful to surround her with men who not only had no problem with the idea of a female leader, but, were in fact, engaged and even attracted to the idea.” He then went on to “jokingly” say that he writes characters like Buffy “‘cause they’re hot.” 

Whedon’s acceptance speech unwittingly reveals the contradictions, and similarities, within both his work and interpersonal relationships. Though he may have spent decades fooling Hollywood and his fanbase with his performative brand of feminist allyship, Whedon’s public persona was always a ruse to disguise the fact that he never actually respected strong women. He simply wanted to fuck them.

[oveliagirlhaditright]

So... I don't really know where to start this meta thing I'm going to attempt to write here? I suppose I'll begin with what prompted me to really think of this and want to write the whole thing: there's a new Buffyverse book that's come out, about a new Slayer (it's called "Sign of the Slayer"), and from having read some reviews for it on Amazon, I guess the MC falls in love with a vampire in it. And I should mention that I'm really not trying to knock this novel here. At all (especially since I'm sure it's a fine book). I mean, I haven't read it, so it's not fair for me to have any opinion on it as a novel at all.

My issue, however, is the whole the Slayer in it being in love with a vampire thing. And it's definitely not the first thing to do it. And that's my problem: that this is sort of starting to become a trend.

I'll admit that I got into Buffy the Vampire Slayer pretty late (namely because I was too young to watch it when it was airing). I think I first watched it and Angel around 2018, or something like that. And I knew from cultural osmosis that both Angel and Spike where characters who were vampires in the show, and ones that would be love interests for Buffy. And I just remember feeling before watching the show, "She's a vampire slayer and she has a relationship with two vampires? She must not be doing her job very well." And I felt like the show would be something like The Vampire Diaries, True Blood, and/or Twilight (Bella doesn't have two vampire love interests. Rather it's a paranormal love triangle between her, a vampire, and a werewolf, but you know what I mean)... when that couldn't be further from the truth.

Joss Whedon himself said that he felt that when he was doing the Buffy and Angel relationship that, yeah, it was a bit of a cliché: but it felt like one he had to do: one, because the chemistry between Sarah Michelle Gellar and David Boreanaz was off the charts. And two, that it was just kind of too perfect, that Buffy would fall for the one person that she was meant to destroy.

And you know what? I definitely think Buffy and Angel worked, for the most part. Buffy started to fall for Angel before she knew that he was a vampire, so it was probably impossible to halt those feelings even when she did learn the truth. Whereas Angel is taken to see Buffy when she's Called to be the Slayer, and it gives him something to fight for for the first time ever, really.

After a hundred years of just wallowing in guilt because of the things he did after getting his soul, he now realizes he can do more--and try to make amends--by helping her in the good fight, and trying to help this poor girl who wouldn't have much of a chance without him, and who has no idea the things she's really about to face.

And when he sees her parents fighting about her that night (the first night she had to sneak out to slay a vampire), about whose fault it was their child snuck out, Angel sees himself in her--because his own life used to be like that. And he wants to protect her from some of the fall-out of what happened to him.

Then they meet and fall in love (partially because they can understand each other like no one else can, in that both of them are creatures who neither fully belong in the human or demon world. There's a demon in the Slayer, too)... the vampire thing is revealed, and they realize there can never be anything between them and try to stay apart, but can't.

They truly start dating in S2, and are happy, but then they learn more about the curse that was put on Angel that returned his soul: if he ever experiences a moment of pure happiness, he'll lose his soul and become a monster again. Which happens, because he loves Buffy too much (after one night of passion between the two). So Angel and Buffy become enemies, and when he eventually tries to destroy the world she has to send him to Hell.

He does come back a year later (with his soul back, after Willow restored it). And they try to make a go at it again, but they can't ever really be together--and deep down, they know they're kidding themselves and there's no real chance for them--and eventually Angel leaves for his own show, to continue fighting in L.A. instead of Sunnydale (after Buffy's given him the confidence that he really can do good). And they'll have some crossovers after that: always being there for the other, if the other needs them and connected.

It works because their story is tragic... and that they know a Slayer and vampire can't be together. There's also just something so deep and profound, that Buffy and Angel are perfect for each other, in that they'll always put the fate of the world before their own selfish desires--as any good person should--but that's the exact reason they can't be together.

But then, later, they try to do stuff with Spike... And even when I was more of a Spuffy fan, it still worked less for me and I was starting to feel that, "This is giving Buffy a bad look" thing (even if I get how people might argue it instead shows that she realizes the world isn't black and white). Like, writers, if you're saying that Buffy and Angel can never work/should never work because Buffy's a Slayer and Angel's a vampire, why are you almost acting like that's not true of Buffy and Spike, then? And the fact that this becomes Buffy's second vampire lover... like I could accept one, the way they handled it. But two? Really?

There was Buffy and Dracula stuff, of course, too. And Buffy definitely didn't have feelings for Dracula, as she was under thrall the whole time with him. But he's the only vampire she ever drank the blood of. And there was probably supposed to at least be a physical attraction, since originally they'd planned to cast Freddie Prinze Jr in the role.

Then in Boom's first Buffy the Vampire Slayer AU, Xander got turned into a vampire and Buffy wasn't sure if she loved him or not.

And people probably don't count this--and probably for good reason--but Ford was someone Buffy had a crush on before she came to Sunnydale... but in dying of brain cancer (and not wanting to die a slow, painful death), and knowing Buffy was the Slayer, he came to Sunnydale and made a deal with Spike and Drusilla that he would lead her into a trap for them if they changed him. And he succeeded in this... even though she escaped, and they of course didn't get to kill her, so they turned him, and Buffy had to stake him at the end of the episode.

In the "In Every Generation" series, Frankie likes a demon (Aspen, as well. These two Slayers are in love with the same one). But, I guess, at least that's a demon instead of a vampire to make it somewhat different.

And I'm worried the new Slayer in "Slayers" will be in love with a vampire...

I also just know that if the Buffy the Vampire Slayer reboot show would have happened (if it had been a sequel, instead of a reboot. Because if it would have been a reboot, I would have been okay with Buffy falling in love with Angel again. Even though I would have wanted it to be just Angel. Or Angel and Spike combined into one character for the aforementioned reasons. -shot-), they would have had her fall for a vamp, too.

(I haven't finished reading "Slayer" and "Chosen" yet. So far, I'm not getting the impression that Nina will fall for a vamp, because she's so anti-Buffy, but I could also be wrong. And maybe this could be part of her character development, in realizing the world isn't in black and white as she thought. IDK. I'll keep reading.)

Let's also not forget Faith hitting on Angel and Spike. Though, to be honest, I'm less inclined to count this... because I think we all know she really didn't want them, but Buffy instead.

But, I mean, can we stop? I thought our Slayer Buffy having a thing for a vampire was supposed to be special?

And now, for the heck of it, I'm going to go through any Slayer I can think of who has had a thing for not just vampires (but also those, of course), but a magical being:

The Slayer in the "Girl in Question," who was not Buffy, who slept with the Immortal.

In Buffy season 8, the "Twilight" prophecy is talked about. It seems like a Slayer was meant to have sex with a vampire for this prophecy--this was a part of the next stage of evolution--and they were then meant to evolve even more together (into gods, create a new world together, etc.). This is clearly Buffy and Angel, but I guess there was one point where a group of Watchers had thought it had happened earlier than this--and the prophecy was coming to pass--and they all killed themselves because of it. So was there some sort of vampire and Slayer romance back then (probably not. The comics at least make it clear that Buffy was the first Slayer to ever have sex with a vampire). Unless it was romance between these two (at least temporarily), and it just didn't go as far as sex. Or maybe it was none of this, and they didn't know that part of the prophecy (about Twilight happening because of love because of a Slayer and vampire) at all yet.

Kennedy with Willow, who is a witch.

In one of the Buffy "Tales of the Vampires" comics, this guy and this girl are best friends (it's also pretty clear they like each other). The guy gets turned into a vampire, however... He then finds out his best friend was a Slayer (this is after Buffy activated the Slayers in S7). The two of them are fighting at the end of the story, and it ends on a cliffhanger about who will win. But you kind of get the sense that the vampire will, and that he'll turn the Slayer.

Melaka Fray, at the very least, acknowledges after Angel has this powerful leader moment why her sister Erin thinks that Angel and Spike are hot, even if she still thinks she's a deviant for it. LOL

Satsu with Buffy, who is a Slayer.

Faith with the hitting on Angel and Spike, mentioned above, while surely really wanting Buffy. She also got with Robin Wood, who is the son of a Slayer and has some slight powers because of that. And I also swear there was something between her and Gigi in the comics, who was another Slayer. And that, maybe, the comics were hinting at something between her and Willow in the end.

Gigi: I feel like she and Faith had some feelings for each other (both of these girls being Slayers). And it also seemed like Gigi felt for her one guardian figure (it's been a while since I've read S8). Who was some sort of warlock or sorcerer, who ended up betraying her in the end?

Edit: And, yes. I get why some probably think these relationships work best for Slayers, because Slayers have demons in them and vampires and demons do too, obviously. Or because Slayers have super strength and these beings are strong like them and won't get hurt, and that's fair. (People also find Slayer/human relationships boring, the way they've been portrayed in the Buffyverse.)

But I still think Slayer/human relationships could be done (and at this point, it would actually be more original than pairing a Slayer with a demon): like look at how people love the idea of the Buffy Summers/Dean Winchester crossover ship. It can be done. It just needs to be done right.

[girl4music]

A character study analysis -

Why Tara Maclay matters

"Now I’ve never been much of a shipper. I think the first ship I ever telegraphed was Harry Potter and Cho Chang, and while I was a little sad they didn’t work things out, I never hated Harry/Ginny. And I accept it as the natural progression of their story. But when I was a kid watching ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ for the first time about 10 years after it first aired there was one ship I fell in love with and was willing to die on a hill for. ... This isn’t going where you think.

I) My Unnecessarily Long Backstory

Very quickly Willow became my favourite character. I’d loved and adored Sarah Michelle Gellar in just about everything I saw her in beforehand but when I finally got around to watching the show that made her famous, I strangely preferred her more as these gals. I’m more receptive to Buffy as a character these days and can appreciate her performance but younger me was all about Willow. Alyson Hannigan’s work continues to impress me with how she transformed a shy bumbling nerd into a powerful confident witch across seven seasons without once making me feel like the characterisation was betrayed. It’s still a marvel to me how Alyson can effortlessly be adorably hilarious in one scene and heartbreakingly emotional in the next. One of the reasons I kinda, sorta love the magic-is-a-drug storyline in Season 6 and the subsequent Dark Willow thing is the strength of this gal’s performance. So now I’ve hopefully established my love and devotion to this character and can convey that if they were going to put her into a relationship with anyone other than me and have me accept it… said partner had better be the perfect match for her. 

Enter Oz. Oz represents a good example of how to create a love interest that exists to put someone in a relationship without feeling like you’re actually doing that. He complimented Willow and his very presence helped her become a better person. Unfortunately by Season 4 Seth Green had grown creatively dissatisfied and scheduled conflicts with another film meant he had to be written out only six episodes into the season. As heart-wrenching as Oz and Willow’s break-up was, it proved beneficial in the long run.

Amber Benson was introduced the same season as a character called Tara Maclay. She was not intended to be a love interest for Willow outright since although Joss Whedon had envisioned one of the main cast turning out to be gay, he was actually leaning more towards Xander being the candidate. The main reason for Tara’s introduction was because Willow had become significantly more powerful over the four seasons and thus was no longer able to convincingly be put in danger the way she used to. So they needed a new character that could serve as their resident distressed damsel. Amber Benson almost wasn’t cast because, well, Joss Whedon has his body preferences. Marti Noxon, however, could see that the vulnerability she brought to the character was what they ultimately needed. Through a combination of convenient timing and the surprising chemistry between the two actresses, their friendship was eventually written to have them become a couple. In what became a shocking move for the series the episode ‘New Moon Rising’, in which Oz returns, ended with him and Willow parting on good terms and Willow choosing to stay with Tara. To say this was met with an uproar would be an understatement. Willow and Oz have been a popular pairing and in the far less enlightened early 2000’s the idea that Willow would not only turn down Oz but do so in favour of another woman… To cut a long story short, Amber Benson was met with so many nasty comments that she nearly left the show. But, of course, she didn’t. And I want to highlight just how impressive it was that this character was despised for no reason other than the fact that Willow chose her over Oz. And then at the end of Season 6 when she was written out, there was even more backlash. While I love Oz it’s impossible for me to ignore that his successor became just as, if not more popular, and her successor was the most despised character in the entire franchise. Seriously, there are Xander fans, Wesley fans, even the odd Riley fan. I will be very surprised if this video reveals the rare thing known as a Kennedy fan. Tara was that tough an act to follow. 

II) The Triumph of Representation

The Willow and Tara relationship was not the first time a queer romance had been depicted on TV and nor was Buffy the first series to have an established character suddenly come out after been assumed straight beforehand. But compare the sitcom Ellen in which the title character came out alongside her actress and was met with a lot of criticism for the tone shifts that followed with people such as Elton John telling Ellen to “shut up about being gay and start being funny again”, Buffy was notable for not having a big coming out moment or a very special episode about homophobia. It also stood out for avoiding the other end of the spectrum. The Willow and Tara relationship was treated with the same grace and seriousness as any other on the show. Incidental and un-stereotypical. It was positive representation without beating you over the head with it. Queer viewers could see themselves in either character and find comfort and relatability. Straight viewers could see another perspective and learn to normalise the idea. The relationship had an uphill struggle behind-the-scenes with restrictions on what the characters could or couldn’t be shown doing. Forcing the writers to use magic as a metaphor for exploring their sexuality. They didn’t share their first on-screen kiss until Season 5’s ’The Body’ after eighteen episodes as a couple. But despite those restrictions they still stood out as being a same-sex couple on a major show, in which they were accepted as a vital part of the main cast. Both powerful and fallible in their own ways and existing as independent characters in their own right rather than tokens there to meet a quota. And while there was obviously a bigger focus on Willow at first, since she’d been on the show since it started, the writers quickly began to explore Tara’s character in interesting ways. 

III) A Different Kind of Empowerment

The 90’s were the era of aggressive, in-your-face girl power in which women declared they could do exactly what the men did and asserted their strength in a multitude of ways. Buffy expressed her strength through physical prowess and razor sharp wit. Willow expressed hers through intelligence and, later, unrivalled magic powers. Cordelia and Anya likewise stood out for their unfiltered, independent attitudes towards life that were then refined through character development to being unafraid to do the right thing. Tara stood out by being defined through her kindness and empathy. She’s introduced as the only Wiccan at a college meeting who listens to Willow and validates her interest in pursuing more advanced spell casting. She then acts as Willow’s guide and mentor to help her improve her powers, remaining an understanding and empathetic teacher the whole time. Even when meeting Oz, she’s understanding of the idea that he and Willow might get back together despite how much pain this would cause her. Throughout the series kindness and compassion would be her defining characteristics. And showing that she is far more than just ‘the nice character’, her first episode establishes that she is also a powerful witch in her own right, providing Willow with enough assistance to fight off The Gentlemen. This helped set her apart from, say, Dawn, who ended up in distress so much the show itself had to lampshade it. Tara was given just enough competency that her ending up in trouble was never annoying, and she justified her presence in the main cast. This made her an easy character to root for and accept. 

IV) Tara as Her Own Person

Once she was established as Willow’s girlfriend the show set about developing her into her own person so as not to remain a satellite character. The Season 5 episode ‘Family’ properly delves into her backstory revealing that she comes from a history of abuse and has been brought up to think that she’ll turn into a demon when she reaches adulthood. This story serves to put the audience on Tara’s side where we see that she fears Willow and the others will reject her if they discover this. We’re shown what she’s had to put up with from her family, explaining her shyness and vulnerability, and thus endearing her to us all. So in the end, when the demon thing is revealed to be just a lie to keep the women in the family in line, the episode celebrates that Tara can remain within the main cast. Also her relatives disapproval of her interest in magic and witchcraft is an effective parallel to her sexuality, making the ‘family of choice’ theme very relatable. The episode ends with an affirmation that Tara is an essential part of the group and the show.

But I’d argue that the most significant turning point in her character development isn’t actually from an episode that centers around her. Season 5’s ’The Body’ is considered one of the best episodes of the entire series and it is important for Tara not just because it features her and Willow’s first on-screen kiss. This right here gives Tara a role that only she can fill in the show. Someone who has experienced the loss of her mother at a young age and can relate to what Buffy, and indeed Dawn, are feeling. And as someone who didn’t know Joyce as well as the others, she is able to be the one who can hold it together and be a rock for everyone. We’re normally used to seeing Willow reassuring Tara or being the stronger partner, but this allows Tara to fill that role too. Putting them on an equal footing. In the next episode ‘Forever’ Tara establishes her identity as someone with a different perspective from Willow in what would be a recurring source of conflict for them. Willow - the witch who came to the craft late - always wants to bend the rules and push the limits of what she can accomplish while Tara - the natural witch - knows and respects these limits and doesn’t like meddling with the natural order. Conflict between them is further explored in the episode ‘Tough Love’, highlighting another part of Tara that distinguishes her as her own person. The inner-belief that Willow sees her as just an experiment and will go back to boys as soon as she loses interest in her. And while this isn’t great for Willow to hear, it serves to reaffirm that Tara is her own person with her own thoughts and fears and not just an extension of her girlfriend. She is then the one who is targeted by Glory and has her mind… well I don’t know what the technical term is but because of that Tara then reveals the season’s big secret to the villain. That scene may be a little clunky but the act itself further puts Tara on an equal footing with the main cast. Things now only happen because of her that can only be done by her. A conflict set up by her disharmony with another character that then leads the turning point towards the finale and now she becomes the secondary part of the main tension. It’s not just ‘will they protect Dawn and stop Glory?’ But now ‘will they save Tara too?’. And once it happens in the big battle Tara contributes in a way that reminds the audience that she is also a powerful witch just like Willow.

That’ll continue into the next season. So Season 5 ends with Tara no longer being ‘just Willow but less powerful’, but an important character who serves the narrative. 

V) Character Development

The two-part episodes that opens Buffy’s first season on the UPN network is the best season premiere across the entire series. Beginning what is my second favourite Buffy season after three. Tara is one of four characters preparing a dark spell to resurrect Buffy from the dead after she sacrificed herself at the end of Season 5. Initially on-board with the idea we see that aforementioned conflict come into play when it’s clarified how Willow has been hiding some of the darker parts of the spell because Tara is the one who would question her. And one of the things I love about this episode is how it shows Tara rising to the occasion. In a crisis where Willow was too drained to be their heavy hitter, Tara steps it up and demonstrates how she’s a force to be reckoned with too. And I don’t want to gloss over this badass moment either. Like in ’The Body’ we’re shown that when Buffy is M.I.A it is Tara who the group really needs. She keeps everyone together and ensures they stay on track. And what is the next significant development in her story this season?

Tara is the first one to become aware of Willow’s increasing problems with magic use and what happens next becomes a fascinatingly ironic twist in the tale where Willow erases Tara’s memory of their arguments just in time for the musical episode in which Tara gets an entire song to herself titled ‘Under Your Spell’. While a double-meaning to the memory erasing Willow did, it’s mainly about how their relationship has helped her come out of her shell and shine to her full potential. Besides designating her as important enough to have her own solo the song serves as an important next step in something very hard she has to do. In the episode ’Tabula Rasa’, when Willow’s problems become impossible to ignore and it’s clear she can’t be reasoned with, Tara breaks up with her. Despite how much it hurts her to leave and the cold reaction she gets from Dawn in response, she walks out because she now knows her own self-worth and understands her right to be treated with respect. At a point in the series where Buffy and Willow falls so low they resort to using the ones they care about, Xander and Dawn just hurt people, and Giles abandons someone who needs his guidance, Tara has reached her peak in knowing when to stand up for herself and not tolerate mistreatment. And she doesn’t punish the other characters who cared about her for Willow’s actions. She still makes an effort to be involved in Dawn’s life after the break-up. Even staying over at the house after Buffy and Willow are out all night. Even though Dawn is on paper just the little sister of her girlfriend’s best friend and Tara has no obligation to keep in contact with her, she still looks out for her and tries to provide some stability. But Tara’s friendship with Buffy is something that just made me love her even more. And like in the previous season, this creates a role for Tara that only she could fulfil. Buffy could never talk to Xander or Willow about her relationship problems. Giles is out of the picture. And, well, Anya isn’t the sort of person you kiss and tell to. Tara meanwhle is outside of the group at this point so Buffy feels safer going to her about problems. And Tara again shares this understanding with Buffy that allows her to open up. Having feelings that you’re ashamed of and worrying you’re biologically wrong for things outside your control. The script for this scene in ‘Dead Things’ originally had a line where Tara drew parallels between her being a lesbian who’s had to hide her relationships to Buffy being ashamed of hers with Spike. And it’s not drawn attention to but Tara herself was recently in a relationship with someone who could be very virtuous but also had a dark side and was doing bad things that was getting impossible to ignore and justify. Tara is able to provide that support to Buffy and be there for her and making sure Spike stays in line. And even with regards to Willow she’s supportive of her attempts to get clean in a healthy enough way. Take this scene in ‘Older And Far Away’ where Anya is trying to pressure Willow to cast a spell that will allow them to leave the house they’ve been magically trapped in. While the metaphor doesn’t really land (how many life or death situations require alcohol or drugs to get out of?) the sentiment does. Tara stands up for Willow, recognising that she is trying to be better, and again, serving as that grounding presence who prevents the others from falling apart.

By her final episode, this shy wallflower who put up with mistreatment for so long has transformed into a confident, passionate woman who stands up for what she believes in, will lay down boundaries that she will not tolerate the disrespect of,… but also balances that with being 100% there for her loved ones and not hesitating to help someone in need. I hate to constantly reference ‘Games Of Thrones’ but the development of Sansa makes for a good contrast. Both she and Tara start out in perpetual victim mode and their powerlessness is frequently emphasised. Sansa’s character development into ‘empowered woman’ involves shedding her femininity and the attributes that defined her virtues in opposition to her flaws. Most notably her compassion and ability to be smarter than she’s given credit for. Someone who took pity on a drunk knight, became friends with an inexperienced handmaiden, comforted several scared women in a war zone, and stood up for her husband when his family tried to publicly humiliate him develops into someone who smirks after feeding a man to his own hounds, nearly has her own sister assassinated, trash talks a woman who’s literally fighting on the front lines for her, and her reaction to being indirectly responsible for an entire city of innocents being destroyed is…

Tara’s character development allowed her to become stronger and more confident while still retaining the virtues that were built into her characterisation from the beginning. She doesn’t become perfect and I’d argue that restarting her relationship with Willow at the end of ‘Entropy’ probably wasn’t the wisest move that she herself admits - but hey, she’s human. And then what happens?

VI) A Meaningful Death

The real twist of Buffy Season 6 is that The Trio of Warren, Jonathan and Andrew aren’t the true Big Bads. Their actions just unleash the real one. Enraged and distressed at Tara’s accidental death, Willow goes off the deep end and first just tries to kill the three boys in revenge but then escalates into trying to destroy the world to alleviate her pain. It’s probably my favourite arc in the series - or close enough. And even though Tara isn’t technically involved in this arc - what with her dying to start it off - it still speaks to the strength of her character. Tara had previously shown herself as the anchor who kept the group grounded in the aftermaths of deaths or absences, and it was her leaving Willow and being less involved with the group that led to them falling apart. So her death is indeed what allows for things to escalate this way. Remove the group’s anchor from the equation permanently and the conflict increases for maximum drama and therefore excitement. And because Tara was such a beloved character it just adds to the emotional investment. We don’t just want Buffy to stop Willow because the world ending would be a downer in general. We want Willow to be stopped before she crosses lines in a way that Tara herself wouldn’t want, and that she would permanently stop being the character we know and love. Tara’s death also forces things like Xander and Anya to actually talk about their issues rather than what they’ve actually been doing in the fallout of the wedding. Or Buffy to stop seeing Dawn as just someone to protect and closer to an equal member of the team. The resolution to this storyline is not an elaborate spell, fight routine or comically large weapon… but having compassion for the monster and stopping the apocalypse with an act of love - which, arguably, is a very Tara solution to things. 

VII) Conclusion

Despite Tara dying at the end of Season 6 there were plans to bring her back in various capacities before the series ended. Given that the Big Bad of Season 7 could impersonate anyone on the show who’s died, she was a prime candidate for that. The episode ‘Conversations With Dead People’ was, in fact, supposed to have her in this scene instead of Cassie but Amber Benson turned it down. Her reasoning being that the Willow/Tara relationship had meant so much and been a lifeline to many viewers who related to it, and seeing Tara as an evil being telling Willow to die “would just destroy people”. You can read the script for that scene in the link below. And yeah, it’s good, but what we got with Cassie is just as effective. There was also a proposed episode where Buffy would get one wish from The Powers That Be and consider using it to, say, restore Angel’s humanity, defeat The First for good, or bring her mother back to life. And it would end with her showing off a new pair of shoes to Willow - letting her believe she used the wish for that - before stepping aside to reveal Tara. The reason for this not happening was initially just that Amber Benson had a directing opportunity in the UK but she later confessed the following: 

“I had had some issues with somebody on the show and it had kind of come to a head just as I was getting ready to leave… Leaving the show was sad, because there were some of the crew and the writers and some of the cast that I just adore… But I had made my peace with that person and the show, and I was done… I’m leaving everything in a good place… I don’t need to come back…” 

Would the series have been served well by having Tara come back from the dead? On the one hand - that part of Season 7 showing Willow dealing with mourning her and learning to balance magic on her own is pretty strong. On the other - Kennedy, am I right? Part of me feels that Buffy was never the sort of show to have the wish fufillment element. On something like ‘Charmed’ - yeah, no bother. But Buffy always had this gloomy 90’s ‘life sucks - do what you can with it’ vibe. Mainly from Joss Whedon’s mantra that happy people make for boring television. Bringing Tara back may have been little more than fan service. And it’s actually another actor on the show commenting on their character that helps me come down on the side of letting Tara stay dead. Emma Caulfield spoke about how Anya was killed off in the finale, and unfortunately I can’t remember the exact quote or where to find it, but she used the fact that people were upset at the death and that it affected them as a sign that she was successful as a character since a death that no one cared about would hardly be an example of good writing. Tara was lucky in that she got the generous treatment from the writers. Never being given these low moments that were less organic character flaws and more ‘WTF Whedon?!’ I mean Willow will probably be the character I love most overall. Buffy is great and Oz can’t be touched. Gotta love Anya and Cordelia too. But I think Tara easily had the best development and avoided any nasty derailment that virtually nearly everyone else got at some point. And she’s a testament to what the show did right and what holds up about it all these years later.” - Better With Bob?

A fantastic well-worded and reasoned character study analysis of the character Tara Maclay and why she matters even though she was never credited as part of the main or season regular cast. While I don’t believe that Tara had the best character development - by a long mile - I can’t argue with the sentiment that she was a significant character in the show that taught above all that empathy, compassion, kindness and love is all-important in telling a story about flawed characters that so often need it and that rarely, if at all, ever got it. If not for Tara - who could provide it? Sure, tragic and dramatic storytelling is compelling and teaches many lessons but without the balance of hope and love, it feels more like torture than catharsis. You can’t just throw in the dark without the light, the hard without the ease, and the heavy without the heart. And I think - if it weren’t for Tara and the marvellous way Amber Benson portrayed her, Whedon would have taken all the substance out of what he calls a “weight-y story’. Yeah, life does suck and we should just deal with it however way we can, but empathy is enduring a battle that hasn’t been won yet. It provides the empowerment needed to keep fighting against insurmountable odds. We may not win the battle - but least we can say we never gave up the fight and that we never lost ourselves within it.

And that was what Tara Maclay represented alongside being the personification of purity and ‘the nice character’ and ‘Willow’s girlfriend’. She represented that motivation to keep going, to keep fighting, to keep enduring, and to also remain our best selves in the process because it’s not easy to be a fighter and a lover at the same time. It requires real strength and power too few possess or realize that they once did. It’s not just Willow who needed that lesson. Every main protagonist character did. And Tara Maclay showed them how to endure in the fight through love.

[explosionshark]

So firstly since it makes sense for to go in order This Year's Girl (which I also love). I will never not love a good Slayer Dream, I almost want to interpret that first one, with them making the bed together, Faith bleeding over it with the knife in her gut, as a shared dream like that one in the hospital and Buffy and Faith have just been sharing dreams off camera and Buffy steadfastly does not sell for any of them but with having the other one with the nice picnic with the Mayor being terminator pursued by Buffy and crawling out of that grave wet and sad with the biggest saddest eyes, that it is probably just Faith dreams. I also really liked the touch of the snake intruding on Faith and the Mayor's wholesome time together.

Oh yeah and I have written down here about how I love how the scene of Faith escaping the hospital blends into the next one with Buffy saying "You know I've never stopped thinking about you," while the camera is still on Faith in the previous scene. Also loved Faith going round all the important landmarks, including the Bad Girls sports shop. And the video tape left for Faith from the Mayor and he recorded it between Graduation Day part 1 and 2 I loved it.

"You tried to gut me blondie" "You'd have done the same to me" "Let's have another go and see who ends up on top" They're so normal, and then Faith initiating her dream scene with Buffy chasing her but her dream Buffy's so cold and the real Buffy is full of so much emotion, I love it.

That scene with Faith and Joyce with her trying to comiserate Buffy leaving them behind (and also something that I can only read as Faith flirting with her honestly, she's got them mother issue for sure) while simultaneously trying to dress up sulty for Buffy. I also the juxtoposition between this and Who Are You with Joyce being defiant when she's in front of Faith but when she thinks she's with Buffy and Faith's gone talking about how she hopes she gets the help she needs. And Faith putting on the same lipstick as Buffy as she did here and then telling Joyce to burn it which I can't decide if I should read it as just Faith trying to keep up the cover of being Buffy and hating anything Faith did or if she did legitimately forget and then said to burn it because she want to get rid of any trace of being Faith with how she oscilates between trying to be Buffy and trying to just use her life.

Okay so Who Are You. First up Sarah Michelle Gellar, so good at playing Faith playing her, that alone makes it a really good episode even setting aside everything else great body language as well, that scene with her in the bathroom practicing being Buffy, superb. Love all the little implied backstory in this episode for Faith, her tensing up being hugged by Joyce, she's perfectly fine pursuing Riley when she thinks its just a sex thing but she freaks out when it's clear that Riley and Buffy have a more genuine relationship than Faith's ever had (which we're sort of reminded of earlier with that jibe she has at Xander, not that Xander's on the level of her other hinted prior partners like her mom's new boyfriend at least once I'm sure its hinted at).

And the repeated use of "Because it's Wrong", Faith saving that girl in the Bronze and being surprised by the gratitude, that sequence leaving just after the night with Riley "I'm not a killer, I'm the Slayer" "You really care what I think" "I don't care" (she says as she cares deeply), her being on the cusp of getting away but she sees the news report and she can't because she does want to be Buffy, she hates who she is, she wants that praise and she gives up that chance to get away to go save the people at the church "Because it's Wrong". And that closing sequence where she's on top of Buffy punching her and insulting herself, they swap bodies back and Buffy's there stunned with Faith's tears on her cheeks (this is a shot of all time). And then for the closing scene "Guess she's had her fun" "Yeah ... fun" The teased face turn that could've been maybe if Faith didn't hate herself so much was so good.

I did write down in my notes more Spike Faith solidarity after that bit in the last episode where Xander and Giles went to Spike to see if he knew where Faith was and he said he'd be cheering her on if he saw her but then Faith went fully into that long umprompted monologue about what it'd be like to have sex with Buffy ("Because it's wrong") and yeah that was a wilder direction than I expected that scene to go. She's SO normal.

Oh and Faith instantly clocking Tara and Willow's relationship at a simple glance I now understand why Faith consistently and instantly clocks whoever has a crush on Willow in those fics. Oh yeah one last note I got down Faith checklist Fight Buffy (Check), Become Buffy (Check), sleep with her via proxy by sleeping with her boyfriend (Check) now all she needs to do is be killed by her, forever changing the course of her life and she can finish up that checklist. How would she feel if Buffy killed her while she was in her body and she had to go through the rest of her life in Faith's body, would she love it that someone else has to be her and it'd be someone she knew would be able to pilot her life turn it around, would she hate it that between the two of them its her body that's the one that's still around. She hates herself so much.

There's just so much in this episode. Adam was also there I guess. Oh and I didn't mention it but I did also like Eliza Dushku playing Buffy playing Faith but she obviously wasn't the main focus of the episode.

Also I was wondering if just every episode that had the word girl in the title was a top tier episode what with Prophecy Girl, Bad Girls and This Year's Girl but alas I had forgotten Inca Mummy Girl which breaks this rule.

Also also this is a tangent but another thing Who Are You really crystalised for me that I've been thinking about for a while but I do gotta feel bad for the state of vampires right now, not in a I think it's necessarily a bad direction just that I feel sorry for them. Like at best they can get a job being a goon but they can't even be a goon for another vampire anymore they're all dead they have to settle for demons or Adam. Master, Kakistos, Trick dead, Spike brain chipped, Angel has a soul. At least Drusilla's still out there living her best life, they should just leave Sunnydale start working for her instead of waiting around to be flipped to the latest demon who needs some cold bodies.

Oh yeah The Prodigal and The Ring on Angel were pretty good but they had no chance couldn't invade my brain like whenever Faith watch does. It's nice to see Darla again and Lilah's first appearance. Lemme tell you back in the day when I'd just seen the end of Angel s3, all of s4 and some of s5 Wesley/Lilah was the OTP, could not get enough of them.

yeah one thing i like about the dreams (and this is purely hc BUT) is that i think for faith it leaves some ambiguity, right? she's like. not in a good headspace. pretty clearly traumatized and spiraling but she HAS had these shared dreams with buffy so there's precedence - does part of her think that being pursued by buffy IS, in some way, still a slayer dream? does she think it represents some fundamental truth about her relationship with buffy - that she's already failed so all there is left to do is be killed by buffy? idk i like to think it contributes to her overall experience of being deeply shaken up and death-driven - at the very least it does paint a pretty stark picture of her own varyingly subconscious fears.

(putting the rest of this behind a cut bc we both went off lmao)

"I love how the scene of Faith escaping the hospital blends into the next one with Buffy saying "You know I've never stopped thinking about you," while the camera is still on Faith in the previous scene. Also loved Faith going round all the important landmarks, including the Bad Girls sports shop." <- this always does make me crazy, i love how much of the faith/buffy scene is presented using typical like breakup cliches. it's so good. i never get tired of it.

and yeah okay GOD there's a lot to unpack re: the faith/joyce scene. personally my read on the lipstick thing is kind of tied into my read on the dream. i think it's faith kind of acting out the worst version of buffy that lives in her head. joyce pointing out that 'buffy' has chosen the same thing faith chose has faith recoiling. it's a reminder, to her, of how she's been rejected by buffy. that the things she once needed to believe they had in common were fantasies she made up, because that's the only explanation for buffy rejecting her so hard. 'burn it' is less about the lipstick than it is about how faith thinks buffy feels about her. in her mind she's playing the part - how else would buffy feel if someone suggested she had something in common with faith?

it's funny (not ha ha) that i think this episode, showing faith in buffy's body, living the life she thought she wanted, demonstrates most powerfully how completely and utterly alone she is. it's such a good bodyswap because it accomplishes the 'what if the shoe was on the other foot' thing in a really interesting way. buffy's life IS better than faith's, it always has been, the lesson here isn't that faith was ever wrong about that. the salient thing is just how utterly unprepared to actually live it faith is.

she plays at it, is whacked in the face with reminders of how genuine buffy is, how much of the parts faith resented of her weren't an act for the sake of claiming superiority (the riley stuff being fundamental here) and faith's reaction is... bail. oh fuck, she isn't cut out for this. she doesn't know how to deal with the loving mom and the loving boyfriend. she wants to run. but like you said, by the time she sees the news broadcast, something has happened that keeps her from being able to leave.

i think it's two-fold. one, there's a part of faith that she hates and pretty much refuses to acknowledge because it's so painful, that desperately, desperately wants to reset the board and do better. she just doesn't know how to pull herself out of that spiral when she's already made such a mess of things (see: five by five/sanctuary in ATS) and i think the other part of the equation is the fact that she cares about buffy still. there's a certain amount of rationalization she can claim for hurting buffy, and badly. but one of her deeply ingrained beliefs at this point in her conflict with buffy is that, since buffy has rejected her and they can't be the same, they must be opposites. she is 'bad' buffy is 'good.' to leave, to stop being buffy, would be a kind of trespass against this fundamental law. there are ways she's okay with betraying buffy (though clearly increasingly troubled by) and there are ways she can't deal with.

anyway faith IMMEDIATELY clocking willow/tara and telling spike in detail how cool she thinks it would be to fuck buffy were all time faith lehane dyke moments. i love her so much, she sucks so bad.

okay finally just want you to know that this is gonna haunt me forever:

Faith checklist Fight Buffy (Check), Become Buffy (Check), sleep with her via proxy by sleeping with her boyfriend (Check) now all she needs to do is be killed by her, forever changing the course of her life and she can finish up that checklist. How would she feel if Buffy killed her while she was in her body and she had to go through the rest of her life in Faith's body, would she love it that someone else has to be her and it'd be someone she knew would be able to pilot her life turn it around, would she hate it that between the two of them its her body that's the one that's still around. She hates herself so much.

haha cool

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Wednesday, January 3

WILLOW: I think dummies are cute. You don't? BUFFY: Uuuhhh. They give me the wig. Ever since I was little. WILLOW: What happened? BUFFY: I saw a dummy, It gave me the wig. There really wasn't a story there.

~~BtVS 1x09 “The Puppet Show”~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Rebel (Willow, Willow’s Mom, PG) by badly_knitted

No Boring Rules (Spike, Dawn, PG-13) by veronyxk84

Conversations with the Past (Xander, Assassin's Creed xover, T) by arcanedreamer

Clarity (Buffy/Spike, T) by cawthraven

getting all french with it (Giles/Jenny/Ethan, M) by The_Eclectic_Bookworm

Carrot and Stick (Angelus, William the Bloody, E) by vampbrat

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year (Spike/Drusilla, G) by EustasiaVye13

Blind love (Spike/reader, unrated) by way2geeky

Consequences of a Spring Fling (Giles/Jenny, K) by Bobbie23

[Chaptered Fiction]

Back to the Beginning, Chapter 1/? (Angel/Cordelia, G) by imaginationofadreamer

Under the Water, Chapter 16/30 (Willow/Oz, M) by dwinchester

Divide & Conquer, Chapter 58/60 (Buffy/Giles, E) by Removes_and_Cleans_Glasses_00

a demigods fate, part 3 (Giles/teen!reader, unrated) by specialagentlokitty

a demigods fate, part 4 (Giles/teen!reader, unrated) by specialagentlokitty

a demigods fate, part 5 (Giles/teen!reader, unrated) by specialagentlokitty

Please Don’t Leave Me, Chapter 4 (Buffy/Spike, M) by JM89

The Greatest Love of All, Chapter 1 (Buffy, ensemble, K+) by Aristocrat Writer

[French language] Les deux Phénix, Chapter 5 (Buffy/Faith, M) by Friday Queen

Surviving Together, Chapter 12 (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only) by ionlylikebadboys

Pack My Box with Five Dozen Liquor Jugs, Chapter 3 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by honeygirl51885

A Waxy Gent Chuckled Over My Fab Jazzy Quips, Chapter 3 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by violettathepiratequeen

Three Little Words, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only) by Maxineeden

Cherry On Top, Chapter 23 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Maxineeden

Love Ridden, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by scratchmeout

There are No Epilogues When You Live Forever (Love from the Other Side of the Apocalypse), Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by Asokatanos

Truth Hurts, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, R) by Geliot99

Pack My Box with Five Dozen Liquor Jugs, Chapter 3 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by honeygirl51885

A Waxy Gent Chuckled Over My Fab Jazzy Quips, Chapter 3 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by violettathepiratequeen

Love Ridden, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by scratchmeout

Blood and Dust, Chapter 13 (Buffy/Spike, M) Complete! by Blackoberst

Stomping on butterflies, Chapters 1-2 (Buffy/Spike, T) by Blackoberst

[Images, Audio & Video]

Artwork: buffy for the outfit meme (worksafe) by genericaces

Manip: GYEONGSEONG CREATURE (but spuffy-fied) (worksafe) by kaizsche

Manip: A gift for all Spuffy Shippers this holiday season! (worksafe) by pass-the-dyanmite

Artwork: Alcohol marker portrait of a photoshoot picture of Sarah Michelle Gellar (slightly spooky, worksafe) by m-mangan-art

Artwork: Some ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ sketches (Ensemble, worksafe) by m-mangan-art

Comic art: Another sneak peek at my Buffyverse slams fist first into the Good Omens Gaimanverse comic (worksafe) by gleafer

Artwork: xanya! they feel like a matching clothes couple (worksafe) by genericaces

Artwork: 5x07 Fool for Love / 6x07 Once More With Feeling (Buffy/Spike, worksafe) by though-you-try

Comic art (3 panels): Who got Buffy in my Good Omens??! (worksafe) by gleafer

Toast, Chapters 1-6 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) Complete! by Dynamite

Spuffy Visions, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by bewildered

A Real Good Day (Buffy/Spike, G) Complete! by though_you_try

Some Aspects Of Spuffy, Chapters 1-3 (Buffy/Spike, R) by Lmrln

[Reviews & Recaps]

PODCAST: HELLMOUTH HOMOS: Doppelgangland by Fear Queers

[Community Announcements]

Jan 2024 Prompt and Pairing by btvscrackships

Buffyverse Fandom: Otherworldly Chemistry Presents: Flash Fiction January and Febraury 2024 via fanwork-exchange-promos

[Fandom Discussions]

[Jenny Calendar deserved better meta; commentary in the tags] by snails-in-my-mouth

s6, aka “what if everyone just ignored each other because they all just need so much fucking therapy it’s unreal” [commentary in the tags] by twicedeath

I’m not an Angel hater by any means however I do think Spike should get to be as big of a dick to him as he wants to be [commentary in the tags] by horsegirlhob

Day 2: Favorite Supporting Character. Tara McLay by k0nstantly-tragic

I love the idea of wlw/mlm solidarity with Willow and Oz but I also absolutely love the idea of Willow being Bi and being poly with Oz and Tara. by swarm-of-bees67

[anon ask] Hi! Do you prefer Fred/Wesley, Fred/Gunn or both?! answered by keylimequeen

Detective Lockley: How would you bring her back into the fold by NyleveEiram

What character from another universe would you want to drop into the Buffyverse? by Babettesgnomes

How old is Ben? by Few_Improvement_6357

One of the saddest parts about the end of "Chosen"... (MAJOR SPOILERS INSIDE) by jdpm1991

Just finished Buffy for the first time and I’VE GOT QUESTIONS by clarry1888

Spike - The Doctor is in… not the evil doctor episode Rather Spike as the guy who tells it like it is by AlkahestGem

Is there a song that makes you think of Buffy that wasn’t on the show? by buffy_slays

Submit a link to be included in the newsletter!

Join the editor team :)

[fancoloredglasses]

Once More With Feeling (Better than Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark)

[All images are owned by 20th Century Fox Disney and Mutant Enemy Productions. Please don't sue, bite, or stake me]

(Thanks to Samantha Graff for all video clips)

Joss Whedon wanted to do a musical episode for Buffy since its inception, but it wasn’t until Season 6 that this would become reality.

None of the actors had much experience with singing or dancing (though Michelle Trachtenberg, who played Dawn, had ballet training and Anthony Stewart Head, who played Giles, was in a band), and the episode’s musical/dance scenes (19 hours of singing and 17 hours of dancing!) were shot at the same time as four other episodes, making it one of the more grueling episodes to film.

The actors really didn’t want to do it. Sarah Michelle Gellar protested until Whedon suggested asking Jewel to dub in her songs (there was no way Gellar wanted to have someone else sing what would be a key moment in the season!) Trachtenberg and Alyson Hannigan wanted their singing to be minimized (Whedon agreed, giving Dawn a ballet number…and Willow has a bit in one song stating “I think this line’s mostly filler”)

I will note that, due to Tumblr’s restrictions, I can only include so many videos of the songs. Any I cannot include I will provide links for the curious.

Enough background, on to the show…which starts with (as all but the earliest episodes do) with…

PREVIOUSLY ON…

At the end of Season 5, Buffy sacrificed herself to save Dawn (wait, does that mean there are now THREE Slayers running around?) Willow used a spell to bring her back, thinking she was trapped in Hell (SPOILER: she went the other way) Since her return, she’s been pretty much sleepwalking through her days.

Tara and Willow had a fight about Willow’s irresponsible use of her magic, so Willow cast a forget spell on Tara (doesn’t that prove her point?), with a sprig of a plant known as Lethe’s bramble as a focus.

Xander and Anya have gotten engaged, but Xander’s still having issues getting past the fact that Anya used to be a demon.

Dawn, mostly in an attempt for attention, has begun stealing from various shops around Sunnydale, including the Magic Box (the shop the Scooby Gang uses as a base of operations).

Finally, after getting a chip in his head by a government black-ops program to curb his more violent tendencies (with pain-inducing shocks), Spike has more or less aligned himself with the Scooby Gang and fallen in love with Buffy.

Now, on with the show! If you would like to watch the episode, it’s available on Hulu or behind your favorite paywall.

(As I mentioned, there are too many numbers for me to provide clips for, so I’m going to focus mainly on what I feel are the important ones. If you feel I left out one that was vital to the plot, let me know and we can debate!)

(Yes, that was the Lethe’s bramble Tara found under her pillow in the opening scene)

Now, Buffy doesn’t normally sing her way through fights with vampires and demons, so the following morning she asks if anyone else felt like they were on Broadway the previous night.

I’ll take that as a yes.

The group starts brainstorming when Giles suddenly breaks into song.

Xander thinks it could be witches (which earns a glare from Willow and Tara), while Anya sings a power verse about it being bunnies (that Anya, always good for a chuckle. I mean, it couldn’t be bunnies, right?…right?!?!) Meanwhile, Buffy doesn’t care what’s causing it because they’ll defeat it like they always do, and the rest of the troupe gang joins in the chorus in agreement…

The gang wonders how widespread this is, so Buffy looks outside.

Definitely widespread.

Then Dawn arrives wanting to tell everyone what happened at school, but they already know. So she sees a pendant lying on the counter and pockets it.

Then Willow and Tara make an excuse to leave (they say “research”, but I’m fairly sure it’s more about “exploration”) Sure enough, once they leave, they break into song and start a TV-13+ sex scene that is quickly cut away from.

Later that evening, we see the dark side it the musical-ness of Sunnydale (c’mon, you knew it was coming) as a man starts dancing uncontrollably until he starts smoking, then combusts!

Cue commercial break!

(In case you didn’t guess, this is the Demon Of The Week. He is never named in the episode, but IMDb calls him “Sweet”, played by 3-time Tony Award winner Hinton Battle)

 We come back to commercial the next morning with Xander and Anya in bed.

So, much like a traditional musical, the victims participants occasionally sing out secrets to the audience. However, unlike a traditional musical…

...Xander and Anya are fully aware of what the other was singing when the song ends.

As they lament about their number and Giles tells them about the man who burst into flames last night, we get an aside of a woman trying to sing her way out of a parking ticket (I’ve heard of worse schemes) The three continue to discuss as we get a dance number involving street sweepers.

The conversation switches to Buffy and her disinterested approach to her Calling. That night, Buffy looks to Spike for any insight.

Meanwhile at Buffy’s, Dawn tells Tara she’s happy Tara and Willow made up after their fight about Willow's magic use a few days ago…

…which Tara doesn’t remember. With an “oh shit” expression, Tara heads over to the Magic Box, leaving Dawn alone.

After Tara leaves, Dawn puts on the pendant she took earlier and starts singing…

…but is interrupted as demonic Pinocchios kidnap her!

Cut to commercial.

We come back to Dawn waking up in the Bronze (a nightclub that for some reason teens are also allowed in) where she dances a bit with the Pinocchio demons before meeting her host…

…Sweet, who does a bit of a tap dance before singing to Dawn that he’s planning on taking her back to hell as his Queen. Then Dawn sings to him about Buffy…

…so he sends the Pinocchios to invite the Slayer to the wedding.

We then cut to the back of the Magic Box, where Buffy is training. Giles tries to talk Buffy into having a more active role in raising/disciplining Dawn (Dawn has been acting out a lot since Buffy came back from the dead for a second time)

This sparks a song from Giles about being treated like a crutch as Buffy does a training montage.

Meanwhile, Tara finds a book in the Magic Box that tells her about the Lethe’s bramble.

To say she’s hurt is a major understatement. She’s so hurt that she has a duet with Giles.

Then Spike bursts in with a Pinocchio demon and tells it to sing for them. As the music swells, it simply speaks.

Buffy starts to brainstorm about their attack plan, but…

…yeah, Dawn’s life in the balance ain’t the time to cut the cord, Giles!

Anyway, this sparks the Big Inspirational Number!

Buffy makes a proposal to Sweet: If, after the Boss Fight, they’re both still standing, then she’ll take Dawn’s place as his Queen. Now for the Climactic Power Ballad!

So now it’s out there for everyone to know, but there’s still Sweet to deal with.

Sweet prepares to leave with his bride-to-be (Dawn, not Buffy), but Dawn denies summoning him despite wearing the pendant she stole found that contained the summoning spell. But if Dawn didn’t summon Sweet, who did?

…yeah, my money was on either him or Willow. Turns out Xander wanted a musical wedding and didn’t realize what he was invoking.

Turns out Sweet isn’t as enlightened as you’d think and decides he doesn’t want Xander as a bride.

With that Sweet gives a final refrain and vanishes.

Despite Sweet’s exit (stage left), his presence is still felt as the gang sings the closing number.

Hope you enjoyed this. While not the only bonkers episode (and not even the most bonkers), it is an iconic episode that is fondly remembered by most Buffy fans.

[end-of-the-world-optimist]

The thing is, aside from the horror element often being genuinely frightening, there was a maturity to the storytelling in "Buffy," and a persistent undercurrent of profound tragedy that I just didn't associate with WB teen dramas. The harm and heartache that befall Buffy Summers (Sarah Michelle Gellar) throughout the show are pretty relentless, and mostly a result of something she had no say in — being the slayer. As such, every season was infused with this lingering sense of tragedy that made the show much more than an excuse for teen melodrama — though, there was plenty of that, too.

...

From the moment Sarah Michelle Gellar utters the word "mommy?" with a quiver in her voice, you know "The Body" will be tough going. It's one of the most heartbreaking moments in "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," and the episode pulled no punches after that, depicting the devastating effect grief has on loved ones. And while Joss Whedon had to endure his own horrific experience to be as familiar with loss as he was, he at least harnessed it to create a genuinely moving piece of TV history.

I remember the following episode, "Forever," just as much as "The Body." In episode 17 of season 5, Buffy's sister Dawn (Michelle Trachtenberg) attempts to resurrect Joyce using a necromancing spell before whatever was exhumed knocks on the door of the family home. Dawn then quickly ends the spell just as Buffy swings the door open. And I gotta say, the absolute dread I felt seeing the shadow of zombie Joyce pass the window has stayed with me ever since. As has the appreciation for the show's ability to scare me so deeply without ever revealing just what it is I'm supposed to be scared of.

But there's no doubt "The Body" is the standout episode of the two. Not only did the entire cast deliver moving performances, but the show also proved yet again why it wasn't just your standard teen drama. As Whedon told Metro, "It doesn't give you anything. Death is the thing [Buffy] cannot fight, but it also renders her meaningless. She's not on a lot of committees, she doesn't have a lot of hobbies, it takes away her identity."

...

Read More: https://www.slashfilm.com/1237687/joss-whedon-thinks-this-one-buffy-episode-is-the-best-thing-hes-ever-done/

[tafadhali]

Femslash February Rec Set

Love to do a rec set for Femslash February, and I haven't done a general grab bag of one since 2018. So here is some of my favorite stuff I've read and watched since then!

vids

This Hell by januarium (Do Revenge, Eleanor/Drea)

Heart Shaped Box by sisabet (Killing Eve, Eve/Villanelle) ★

Black Tie by such_heights (A League of Their Own, queer community) ★

Now I Can Fly by walkthegale (A League of Their Own, Jo DeLuca-centric)

Melodrama by mithborien (MCU, Gamora/Nebula) ★

I'm a Man by snarkwithasmile (Revolutionary Girl Utena, Utena-centric) ★

Lost on You by periru3 (She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, Adora/Catra)

If U Seek Amy by elipie (A Simple Favor, Emily/Stephanie)

Bad Guy by AudreyV (Star Trek: Discovery, Burnham/Georgiou)

Become You by ultraviolet_catastrophe (Xena, Xena/various)

Whatever You Like by periru3 (multifandom, be gay do crime) ★

Wherever Is Your Heart by cosmic_llin (multifandom, older wlw)

fic

Eyes Always Seeking by igrockspock (Away, Mei/Lu, 1k)

you can be who you are any day of the week by Sonni89 (Baby-Sitters Club, Mary Anne/Stacey, every member of the BSC comes out to Mary Anne, 8k)

Farm-to-Table, Non-GMO, Responsibly Sourced by impertinence (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Amy/Rosa, undercover as a couple, 6k)

Let It Bleed by elviswhataguy (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Faith/Willow, post-canon, 94k)

and you're on the gossip team by palms (DC comics, Babs/Dinah, 6k)

don't tip the boat over (love and devotion) by merriweather (Derry Girls, Clare/Michelle, 15k) ★

i have crawled over town with your hair in my mouth by Princex_N (Dimension 20, Sam & Zelda, background Sam/Penelope, 4k)

i'm an expert, i'm the one by irisnebula (Dimension 20, Fig/Ayda, college AU, 21k)

let the heavens falter by allapplesfall (Dimension 20, Tracker-centric, background Tracker/Kristen, 28k) ★

Starlight by pigflight (Dimension 20, Fig/Ayda, Tangled AU, 15k) ★

the sound of your heart in your head by pigflight (Dimension 20, Adaine & Ayda, Fig/Ayda, 2k)

The Yunk and the Restless by Nomad (Discworld, Polly/Maladict, 3k)

don't know what a slide rule is for by heart_nouveau (Ghostbusters, Patty/Holtzmann, 3k)

The Other Big One by yeahitshowed (Gilmore Girls, Paris/Rory, canon divergence, 3k)

I Think I Just Blacked Out by Telanu (Grace & Frankie, Grace/Frankie, Brianna POV, 7k)

More Than I Have by chainofclovers (Grace & Frankie, Grace/Frankie, 4k) ★

to know even in the deepest sleep that it is you by millerpertuis (Grace & Frankie, Grace/Frankie, 3k) ★

Signature Color by scioscribe (Legally Blonde, Elle/Vivian, Star Trek AU, 5k)

Comes Out Wrong by Sineala (Marvel comics, Jess/Carol, Secret Invasion-era, 2k)

the only place worth being by overnights (Marvel comics, Kate/America, 17k)

the journey is a work of art by GotTheSilver (My So-Called Life, Angela/Rayanne, future!fic, 4k)

An Officer and a Gentleman by cedarboots (Persuasion, Anne/Frederick, trans, 47k) ★

Return Flight by cedarboots (Pride & Prejudice, Eliza/Darcy, trans, 10k)

they say love is a virtue (don't they?) by yasaman (Scholomance, El/Liesl, 3k) ★

I Made Phone Calls with Foreign Coins by out_there (Sports Night, Dana/Natalie, 1k)

Hey Hey You You I Don't Like Your Girlfriend by impertinence (Spy, Raina/Susan, 9k) ★

don't leave me hanging on like a yo-yo by firstaudrina (Stranger Things, El/Max, post-S3, 1k)

Girlfriends by thingswithwings (Ted Lasso, Keeley/Rebecca, 1k)

I'll Wear the Red Dress Tonight by leiascully (Ted Lasso, Keeley/Rebecca, 4k)

When It Comes to Nightlife by Muccamukk (Ted Lasso, Keeley/Rebecca, 6k)

Inside the Noise by scioscribe (Thoroughbreds, Amanda/Lily, post-canon, 7k) ★

Five Earth Gifts That Dorothy Brought Home by ErinPtah (Wizard of Oz, Dorothy/Ozma, 5 things, 2k)

the skin you're in by stifledlaughter (Wizard of Oz, Dorothy/Ozma, 6k) ★

[bacchicly]

I'm still not sure if watching Buffy The Vampire Slayer with my 10 yo is a good idea yet - since not only does it contain comic book style horror and violence - but as anyone who has watched it knows it has quite a few adult ideas and situations presented and explored...and certainly has all sorts of flaws ...But my kid is interested in costume and make up effects and is not phased by the horror aspects but is very interested in the story arcs...so we are keeping on.

Some rambly parent-y thoughts under the cut...

I suppose we won't know for sure for a decade or so if this was a parental misstep or a way to help my kid navigate an increasingly complex and hard to filter media landscape and a peer group with extremely variable personal experiences and deeply inconsistent access to information/opinions held by adults.

So we are doing our best. And I think we are doing ok. Definately not perfect - but ok.

So far here are some of the examples of the discussions we've had:

What is the the beschel-wallace test and how does Buffy "score". What are it's limitations...what are other similar tests or measures for getting a sense of diversity and representation in media. What inequalities does she see in the show? (some examples we came up with: the lack of non-white actors in core group, no fat people - some instances of fat shaming and fat phobia, the lack of poor and disabled characters).

Why I am frustrated by the mother character in the story.

My kid, an avid fan of owl house, was puzzled why Buffy was weird when she found out Willow was in love with a girl - so we discussed how things are still not perfect in terms of acceptance and representation of 2slgbtqa+ folks... but how they are better in some places.

Some brief chats about safe sex and why sexual feeling can be so persuasive in people who have gone through puberty - but how we have to remember that we always have a choice to listen to our bodies or not. How one choice is not necessarily better than the other but how it is important to think about potential outcomes and how they might effect other parts or yours or other people's lives. How important communication is in relationships - not because there is only one good type of relationship - but so that people are on the same page and can actually consent or not to what is being proposed.

Discussions about drugs and alcohol use.

Discussions about the design choices and how we might have done it differently - how long different costumes would take to put on and how difficult or not it would be to act in particular costumes/masks.

The little I have read about Sarah-Michelle Geller/ Freddie Prince Jr, thoughts on their children/teens being actors.

A bit about the "me too" movement and how Joss Whedon is one of several very powerful men in holiwood accused of/admitted (to some degree) being abusive/inappropriate/a total ass hat.

Do I worry about de-sensitizing my kid? Yes. Do I worry about pushing too far and too fast? Yes. But more than those two things... I worry about my kid not realising that we can make choices. I worry about them swallowing the Disney-esque narratives we are presented so regularly in modern culture uncritically. That they realise it is important to look at situations and problems through various lenses. I worry about them not having the words to articulate their experiences and emotions and thoughts.

So - we will keep on - parenting as best as we can guess... letting our kid lead - but being beside them and pointing out alternative paths that could be walked - lessons we learned the hard way - careful to be honnest but not "over-share"...instead letting our thoughts and values be known as best we can...in a measured way... leaving room for choice and self definition ,.. but hoping and praying that our liberal parenting will not back-fire into our child running for the certainty and uncomplication of the type of close minded conservatism we are deeply opposed to and afraid of.

[wikiangela]

I always thought Xander confrontation with Anya was about him acting as Buffy’s heart:

Both of them feel betrayed by Spike/Anya and Buffy has expressed how conflicted she feels about sleeping with Spike.

So I saw Xander angry reaction of anger, betrayal and disgust of the situation as something Buffy has been thinking forever and being expressed through Xander because Xander is metaphorically Buffy’s heart.

I’m not even trying to sound like a Xander defender that’s honestly how I interpreted the scene when I first watched it

I mean, it's a valid take, and while I absolutely understand why they reacted that way, and it was valid - Buffy had all the right to feel betrayed and hurt, and Xander's anger at his ex sleeping with someone he hates more than anything was kinda warranted - I think my dislike for Xander has been building up for so long I just can't help but feel annoyed 😂

first of all, I'm still so pissed at how he handled the wedding too - how he left Anya there all alone to deal with all the guests and everything - like, if you came back to tell her it's not happening, why not tell everyone?? why leave her to do it?? - and he has the audacity to make a scene when she sleeps with someone else - I understand being angry and hurt, obviously, but it was just infuriating

not to mention how Xander was convinced Anya did it on purpose to hurt him when she had no idea that she was being recorded 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 - I get emotions taking charge and all but like, lmao it was lowkey hilarious 😂

as for Xander and Buffy, Xander has been inserting himself into Buffy's relationships since the beginning, and I can't be the only one who sees that he's still lowkey obsessed with her 😂 I firmly believe that if Buffy was willing to fuck him, he'd jump on the occasion immediately 😂 (maybe I'm wrong, but like, he's been jealous of her boyfriends since day 1, and that never changed, and you can't tell me he's just concerned)

even if they intended for him to act as Buffy's heart, I just can't help but be fucking annoyed with him

I already hated when he defended Riley (which is a whole other thing I'm not even gonna start on bc I'm still too angry) and here he was again jumping into Buffy's love life like he has any business doing so - even if his reaction is what Buffy was thinking... why do that? we already knew what Buffy was thinking and feeling, Sarah Michelle Gellar is such an amazing actress she showed all that in Buffy's face constantly, I didn't need another scene making me like Xander less 😂

Buffy even told him later it wasn't his business who she sleeps with - and it isn't - even if she's making a huge mistake, it's her mistake and he already expressed his disapproval once, he can shut up now

I think my problem with his reaction was mainly about how fucking entitled he feels to Buffy and to always have a say in her romantic relationships, in whatever relationship she's in - I get that they're friends, but honestly, why are they 😂 if my friend was constantly criticizing my relationships, especially when I wouldn't want any advice or anything from them, I'd honestly stop hanging out with them 😂 (unless it was like a very bad situation and they'd have reasons to be worried, but like, Xander knows Buffy can handle herself against Spike and nothing she does is against her will so 💁🏻‍♀️)

besides, just his entire attitude towards Buffy and women in general kinda takes me out of the show and makes me remember that: oh right, this is a 90s show 😂 (like, okay, there's more characters sometimes making comments that make me think that, but lately it's been mostly Xander)

your take about Xander being Buffy's heart makes a lot of sense and maybe if they didn't make me dislike Xander as much until that point, I'd think that too, but alas, I'm just annoyed with most of the things he does 😂 and, like I mentioned, to me it came off more as another example of him feeling entitled to Buffy 💁🏻‍♀️😂 but like with art, with media also there can be as many interpretations as there are people, and that's what's great about it haha

thanks for the ask though! 😘 (and sorry I went on a rant and it got long lmao)

[michellemisfit]

TAG GAME: FANDOM EDITION

Tagged by the wonderful @energievie, thank you my love!

Your Name: Michelle (Mys for short)

Your Age: Just turned 38 🤟

Your First Fandom(s): Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Your Current Fandom(s): Shameless is my current active fandom, but like, you never really leave a fandom, you just get distracted by a new shiny thing. There’s still Merlin (2008) and Shadowhunters (2015) fic open on my phone right this minute. And I go back and read some of my favourite fic from much older fandoms on a semi regular basis. I have hundreds of them saved in word. Because if you love something… don’t let it go! Save the ever-loving shit out of it and keep it on your current laptop as well as on multiple external hard drives for back up!!

How did you first get into fandom? I was looking for someone to talk to, and that wasn’t going to happen in real life. So instead I found myself on a German Buffy Forum, which led me to discover fandom, online friends, and fanfic… all of which changed my life forever.

How long have you been engaging with fandom spaces? Probably since 1998? It was during Buffy Season 1, but when it aired on German TV, so 98/99 sounds about right. I DEFINITELY lied to the ‘are you over 18?’ ticky boxes!!

How often do you read fanfics? Daily. I used to be that kid that would walk to and from school with her nose in a book. Now I’m that adult that walks to and from school reading fanfic on her phone.

Top 3 characters from your current fandom(s): Mickey Milkovich. Ian Gallagher. Lip Gallagher.

Have you ever written a fic for a fandom? if so, shout it out! I have. I’m not primarily a writer, but about once a year I get the urge. Here’s my AO3. Also, if you search very hard you may be able to find some German Buffy/Spike fic out there somewhere, from when I was a child, proof read by my mother, whose main comment was ‘Oh my. You could have a career in erotica…’ (They barely kissed! Sheesh!)

Have you ever drawn fanart for a fandom? Yep. Back in the day I did the full range: Drawings, Icons. Wallpapers. Manips. Fic Banners. Fic Awards. Now I mostly stick with traditional art, and then once a year pumpkins haha Some of my recent stuff is on AO3. You can also find a lot of my art on my RedBubble Page or my Instagram.

Share a personal headcanon that you feel very strongly about: For Shameless? The Gallaghers visited Ian and Mickey in prison. Yes, they are busy, but they love their brother, and by extension they love the person their brother loves! And there is loads of them!! If they visited on rotation, it would only really “cost” them one day a month each. Not a hardship, is it? Also, Lip went more often than everyone else. Send tweet.

You’re trying to convince a friend to get into your current fandom(s) with you. what episode, clip, or scene are you showing them? Depends a little bit on the friend and on what aspect of a show I feel they’d vibe with best. 01x03 Aunt Ginger is a pretty good one. It’s got the full family working together to solve a problem. And it introduces Mandy and the itty bitty murder floof, which is a great bonus!!

And finally, what does fandom mean to you? Absolutely everything. You know Penny Lane’s speech in Almost Famous? “If you never take it seriosuly, you never get hurt, you never get hurt, you always have fun, and if you ever get lonely, just go to the record store and visit your friends.”? I followed bands around for about half a decade, and that, and Oasis’ “Please don’t put your life in the hands, of a rock and roll band, who'll throw it all away” were things I tried to live by. But fandom doesn’t work that way. Fandom is all about emotionally investing. Caring too much is basically a requirement. And what makes it safe is the fact that we are all in this together. <3

~

My word that was fun!

Tagging @malec-crazed-author, @ohfreckle, @rutherinahobbit, @deedala, @rereadanon, @toughpaperround, @teawithjelly, @faejilly, @industrious-ian, @orca122, @poemsfromthealley, @allmyfantasiesarethirdperson, @darknutmeg, @glorious-spoon, @hellofavillain, @howlinchickhowl, @katspace, @lynne-monstr, @captainjowl, @crossmydna, @vintagelacerosette, @beatperfume, @nanf1c

[elinordashwood]

i’m having such a bad tv hangover with buffy. i can connect whatever i’m doing to it like six degrees of kevin bacon. for example i watched the baz luhrmann romeo & juliet for the first time since middle school and the whole time i was like. ‘wow. 1996. one year before btvs started airing...... also i think buffy would have loved this movie because young leo as romeo is all broody like angel’. also when i was on the wikipedia page i found out that they almost cast sarah michelle gellar as juliet

[tuiyla]

not the same anon, but OMG I'd love to know your thoughts on Buffy! But please keep in mind that the show only significantly improves from episode 2x13 onwards (with seasons 2, 3 and 5 being the best ones, at least imo). I find season 1 to be underrated in many ways, but it's certainly not BtVS at its best.

Buffy initial thoughts then!

I thought I'd be more turned off by the 90s of it all but I just keep in mind that the show is now 25 years old, and since like BtVS I too am a child of 1997, I'm not going as hard on it. In a way it really reminds me of that Charmed vibe, and I love Charmed with all its dated-ness. Sarah Michelle Gellar is stellar and I thought she'd have been older during the first season but she was only 20 which is fine. Some of the actors playing high schoolers were deffo 30 but not the main ones as far as I can tell.

Interesting that you say there's a significant improvement after 2x13, I'll keep an eye out. I thought it'd be harder for the show to keep my attention in these very early episodes but no, I'm liking it so far. Only on episode 5 (or already, depending on your perspective) but it's all good so far. Obviously many things are dated but I'm lenient due to the 1997 of it all. Sometimes it's easy to guess what will happen as TV in general was more formulaic in the 90s but I'm seeing already how the show does play with tropes and does the unexpected in fun ways. It surprised me in the very first scene!

Idk if I should do like character impressions, let me know haha. I'm glad to see Charisma Carpenter, or as I know her Kendall from Veronica Mars. I know this will be shocking to all who follow me, but I have a soft spot for mean girls. And great to see Alyson Hannigan, of course, but I was well aware she was a major part of this show.

There are a few things I know about the series already, inevitably since it's a huge pop culture icon and I have been around from its start, but I'm happy to go into with at least somewhat fresh eyes. I guess liking season 1 just fine means that I'll really enjoy "BtVS at its best" haha. I'm sure it will take a while to get through the whole series but I'll keep you periodically updated, if you'd like. I also have no idea whether I'll wanna watch the spinoff, for now I'm staying with the main show.