#i love the new characters a lot theyre all interesting and satisfying and i want to see more of them

[vaugarde]

brain is buzzing bc spiderverse had so much i love about it but i dont want to spoil anyone

[olvitier]

Sorry its so late buf i am in an Edling mood tonight and I will never stop thinking about the idea of how theyre the epitome of right person wrong time.

(obviously in a context of like fandom shenannigans where canon events arent 100% set in stone like edling arent canon but also idc !! they are to me! im ignoring it let me be insane) ANYWAY

Even if they wanted to be together post promised day Ling has all the responsibilities of Xing and his clan and Edward would never hold him back from that for a second. Im of the opinion that brotherhood Edward feels a lot of guilt for wanting love from the people around him particularly those he sees as good (winry, alphonse, etc) especially if hes done things hes perceived as hurting them (maes’ death, the transmutation, etc etc). Which is why I think Edward connects with Ling so well cayse he doesnt carry the weight of a lot if his past mistakes, and then when the stone happens its like goddamn it i roped this guy into my shit again. Like i dont know Edward doesnt really dedicate himself so fully to people outside of winry and ed a lot so its interesting like!!

He cares about a lot of people like the majority of the allied cast and we see him be openly affectionate towards Nina and Hughes pre their deaths but I think Ling is the only person hes ever decided to stick with WITHOUT alphonse? I may be wrong but the whole sure Ill stay with you and trust my brother and Winry to stay safe and follow you around the outskirts of the east for a week till the promised day to protect my new friend is so??? what?? huh???

But anyone my point is post promised day Edward cant really ever see a future with Ling because of all the responsibility Ling holds outside of him and its veyr tragic imo like especially because in a different scenario if Ling didnt have those responsibilities and Edward wasn’t so dedicated to the people around him to a fault of never thinking about his own desires I think they could have the possibility of a future.

Like I have read a lot of fanfiction abiut Ed traveling to Xing and living with him there but?? I realistically cant see him ever doing that just solely because Edward is not the type of person to settle down! like its my one and only criticism of the fma manga is that I cannot see Edward ever being satisfied with a simple life? Like even in Fma 03 which is my favourite interpretation of Edwards character once he gets stranded in our world he learns?? Rocket Science?? For the chance to get back to Amestris but he doesnt really seem to take that goal all that seriously especially considered Alfons ends up getting involved in a lot more aircraft projects than Edward like Edwsrd genuinely enjoys learning!!

Im pretty sure he was the one who dragged Alphonse into Hoenhiems office when they were kids after he left, probably to Al’s reluctance of if they were allowed in there, and started ripping through all of his old books just to learn. Edward never stops and it gets so bad that he never stops to even consider himself constantly worrying about getting his brother back or improving the states of others lives especially when! ya know! the whole country is at stake!!

So in a circumstance post promised day where Ed decides what he wants to do (my personal favourite interpretation is either an alchemical researcher outside of directly performing alchemy, ie revolutionizing the circle matrixes and discovering nee combinations or becoming a professor of some kind) I dont think he would give that up to settle again. And obviously Ling cant exactly up and leave being Emperor unless he decides he doesnt want to, im not the most knowledgable on Lings characterization so I wont speak there but!

They have so much fun together and compliment each other and genuinely care about each other so much but their happiness and fulfillment as people to themselves and others make it so its nearly impossible they would ever realistically end up together and its really doomed and tragic!! idk i think about it a lot.

[eddiegettingshot]

the speedrunning of certain arcs this season is certainly an issue (and I'm willing to give benefit of the doubt on this one based on strikes, shortened seasons and the cruise plot taking up like 40% of their resources probably). but I dont necessarily mind them "speedrunning" the bi buck story like the set up was poor for sure but I dont mind the approach of "btw he likes boys too" especially in the context of an ensemble show with so few episodes and also I certainly prefer it to a story that would have made buck a more central focus of this season. I think the issue here is more they speedran bucktommy to the point where Im just like ?? how am I supposed to feel about separate from bi buck. the set up for the first kiss was poor and since then theyve been dating for a month maybe but also he was buck's date to his sisters wedding but also the narrative suggests tommy and buck probably wont last so ??? and really I just want buck to have a bit of romantic development past "im not dating people from calls" (which they didnt even flesh out why dating people from calls is problematic and i think it would be really fun for them to explore how meeting someone on a call can lead to them developing a hero complex about you and sets unfair expectations on a relationship) and "im bi" but to this point they've failed to develop bucktommy to a point where I feel like buck will learn anything from it besides that. I'm willing to wait until the end of the season to see where that ends up but as far as I'm concerned now the only reason tommy is more interesting than marisol is because of how theyre constantly framing the bucktommy narrative around eddie and lou is actually a semi likeable person 😂 also even if this season clearly isnt thoroughly planned out, if it is to get the characters to a starting point for s8 I'm willing to be optimistic then because I think tim has shown with proper planning he can execute really thorough character arcs with satisfying conclusions (maddie and eddie in s2, buck in s4, a lot of the s1 arcs)

(okay now that Ive all typed that Im actually thinking how a really interesting angle for them to take on bucktommy would be to focus on the idealized version of tommy that buck had a crush on (hes so cool / flew them into a hurricane to save their family) and how that + first guy hes dated probably set unfair expectations on their relationship that arent met in reality (and then coming to the conclusion they should break up). basically Im asking 911 to please have buck reflect on his romanticization of his own relationships/love interests. also sorry to buck tommy spec in your inbox Im just waiting for this relationship to be a tiny bit relevant lmaoo)

ok so actually yeah you're so right about how speedrunning bi buck is fine - i think for me it's that in my head the bi buck thing and the bucktommy thing are like, completely entwined in my head so i'm kind of having a hard time separating the speedrun of buck realizing he likes men from buck falling into a relationship with a man. so yes i don't think the realization necessarily needed more but (as always lol) it comes back down to me expecting more out of buck and tommy specifically especially considering the emphasis on how tommy's going to help him like... disentangle his New Identity. which is clearly not happening lmao.

but yes i actually 100% agree with your bucktommy spec actually and as much as i resent buck's cycle of self-improving through various relationships i do think that would be VERY interesting for buck to start thinking about. well. all the things he needs to think about

[hoodienanami]

What are you thoughts on Danny Boyle's Pistol? I remember you saying that you have mixed feelings and I'm curious! Always love reading about your Sex Pistols opinions :)

i think theres a lot of good and a lot of bad. its a pretty mixed bag overall

what i like about it is how humanizing it is, which is much needed when it comes to the sex pistols. its a very loving portrayal of these real kids who deserve the sympathy boyle gives them in his show. it also takes the time to show the beginnings of the band and bust some myths in the process which is always good. highlighting steve as the main character was a very smart choice on that front. i also like how it shows the complexity of the relationships between the characters. malcolm and steve's relationship is very fleshed out and i think done super well, the actors really sell it imo theyre both perfectly cast. and theres a lot of great moments between johnny and sid, johnny and steve, and one utterly fantastic moment with johnny and vivienne that almost makes up for how little vivienne is in the show. just like thomas brodie-sangster and toby wallace with malcolm and steve, anson boon puts so much effort into his performance and you can tell he adores johnny, theres a lot of complexity there even if the script is lacking much of the time

but what i didnt like is how small the world feels (where are the other bands, why do the bromley contingent play such a small role?), how it leaves out some of the most important moments in the sex pistols career, and completely side-steps what makes the sex pistols so great in the first place which is their insane amount of influence on basically everyone who encountered them

in the show the bromley contingent are all together before the sex pistols play their first concert! why!!! putting aside how historically inaccurate it is to have them all together before the first gig, its much more interesting and narratively satisfying for the bromley contingent to build up as the pistols play more and more gigs!

the clash, one of the biggest names in the long list of bands that only exist bc of the sex pistols, is mentioned in the show but theyre never on screen! it would have been a great moment to see joe strummer leave his lame pub rock band after seeing a single sex pistols concert, following them out the door and wondering if he can find a punk band to join before running into bernie rhodes. bazooka joe are there in the second episode bc they have to be but instead of seeing adam ant, who was part of bazooka joe at the time, leave his band to go join the bromley contingent bc the sex pistols very first gig made him want to change his entire life forever we just get the bazooka joe lads getting into a tussle with the pistols and thats it. goddamn it i want to see pete shelley and howard devoto driving down to london in their friend's car just to see the sex pistols and returning to manchester as the buzzcocks and setting up the lesser free trade hall concert that caused joy division, the smiths, the fall, and factory records to be formed!!!

time and time again boyle misses out on actually showing us what made the sex pistols great even tho he has many chances to do so. the show tells us that they inspire ppl and make ppls lives better but we barely see it! the most we get is one performance by siouxsie

its a show that focuses too much on the personal and not enough on the larger world around the pistols. as much as i like the personal aspects, as much as i like seeing the inner workings of their lives and their relationships to each other, what i want to see from a sex pistols biopic is the sex pistols doing what they do best: inspiring other ppl to change the world. theyre the pied pipers of punk, leading all the creative kids who know theres more for them out there off into a new world where theyre finally free to be themselves and do great things

i also would have liked to see more of how intense and fucked up being a sex pistol was by 1977. we see johnny getting stabbed and chased around after the grundy show but we dont see the real incidents of him (and paul! and jamie reid!) nearly being straight up murdered bc of god save the queen, we dont see how fucking evil the press was to him and the rest of the band. and bc of that we dont see how it affects the band to be treated like this by the public and the press which i think is crucial when it comes to wanting to humanizing the sex pistols and getting ppl to understand them

well at least danny boyle queercoded johnny to hell and back to make his relationship with sid even more tragic then it already was

i liked what we got but it could have been much better

[elcorhamletlive]

I am very critical of the Duffers choices when it comes to how they handle queer narratives, if i were the one writing the situation i probably would not choose an unrequited love storyline either but I get where some of the queer fans are coming from and how this storyline might seem relatable to them. But as you said, this storyline being relatable doesnt really mean it has to end there. I am not a fan of Will being given a love interest in the epilogue but I can see that there is a chance of that happening, and if ST was a longer story i'd prefer him to find a love interest in the college anyway. This ofc has to happen in a more expanded time frame rather than it being included in a 3 minutes screen time in the epilogue.... with that being said, I understand what the writers are going for and what theyre trying to achieve but the writing choices here create certain flawed writing, especially due to limited time.

I agree that Will getting over Mike is actually the best outcome for his character whether or not shippers want to admit it. A lot of talking points i keep seeing regarding Will's character seem to be focusing on the situation from shipper goggles rather than characters' storylines and arcs being portrayed in a logical and satisfying way, because I seriously do not know why someone would wish Will to be stuck in a unrequited love situation while being sad and pining over his sister's taken boyfriend. Especially considering there will be a time skip in the next season , one would think that it is healthier and much better for Will's character to move on instead of him being stuck in this sad pining for a long time since it doesnt contribute to any sort of character development. But i guess shippers like the idea of Will being stuck in an unrequited love for a long time as long as it keeps their shipping fantasy going. Because if Will moves on and finds a new LI for himself it pretty much kills the any chance of their ship sailing the moment that the writers get rid of the unrequited love storyline. And that is partly why i think most shippers are so against the idea of Will moving on and getting a valid development.

Yeah, I think at the end of the day, most shippers are still clinging to the idea that Mike will reciprocate his feelings. That's one of their main talking points - "why make Will be in love with Mike if nothing was going to happen between them? Just to make him suffer?" And it's like... I don't know how I can explain to you that the Duffers likely just view this character in a different way than you do. They probably thought it was an efficient way to reveal Will's sexuality to the audience and that it was the "realistic" way to go about it. From the way they treated Robin's storyline, I think it's pretty clear gay romance isn't something they are particularly interested in writing, and so it follows that they wouldn't realize this is something people would want to see in Will's journey.

I am also not a fan of Will getting a love interest in the epilogue. However, I think a long of young, LGBT+, extremely progressive fans expect these grown ass straight men who made Netflix's most popular show to think exactly like they do. To me, as a non-straight person well-versed in gay media, it seems crystal clear that Will exchanging a smile with a nameless dude is not satisfying representation; and that he should have gotten a multi-season romantic arc with another main character like all the straight kids did. But I'm not sure that the Duffers would understand that. I'm not trying to call them homophobic or anything of the sort - it's just that ST has extremely heteronormative writing, so it doesn't surprise me that they wouldn't grasp this kind of nuance. It is what it is.

I do think maybe they will see the strong reaction Will's plotline got from fans and attempt to make up for it somehow in S5, which is something I generally have mixed feelings about (fanservice has been dragging down the show's quality since season 3), but it might get Will a somewhat developed love interest, like a guy he starts dating during the timeskip and who we get to know in the latter half of the season. We'll see.

[fireemblemseries]

ey yo seth! do you recommend the new fire emblem game? bc i ADORE FE but ive seen absolutely nobody talking about it so i have like. no reference from people who actually LIKE FE playing it, its just dudebros bitching bc "eww a new fire emblem and the protag is toothpaste lmaoooo" which is NOT helpful. also about your fic: dont feel bad, you write from PASSION as it SHOULD BE, grammar be DAMNED

thank you for your comment about my writing, it means a lot!! im glad u think so!

anyways, here is my Honest Opinion(tm) about Engage (under a cut bc its long):

yes, there are many unhelpful biased comments about the designs, the life sim aspects, and the story. ive seen the fucking "lolol toothpaste haha COLGATE heehee PEPSI lmao" joke over and over again with no end in sight. its not that funny anymore, guys.

BUT

to me, as a fire emblem fan (mind you, my first game was path of radiance when i was in ???middle school??? but the first fe game i FINISHED was awakening, when i was about 16 or 17), i think that Engage is fine as it is. :) the gameplay is what REALLY matters in a game, and the gameplay is VERY fun and challenging, so if nothing else, i'd recommend it for its unique playstyle. the story is kind of a rehash of awakening, with some details swapped out, and to me, the writing is actually sliiiiightly better here than in awakening. if you like awakening: great!!! you'll like the story in this game too! its a bit more in-depth, and the villains are focused on much more than in awakening, which i personally appreciate.

alear, the protagonist, reminds me a lot of robin, in that: they make their OWN choices, NOT the player's choice. for instance, in the first few minutes of the game, they decide to RUN from enemies instead of fight! they want to protect their stewards, vander and framme+clanne. i thought that was interesting. so far (and im almost finished with the game), i havent had a prompt about what i, the player, want to do in regards to a story beat. alear does the decision-making for you. even robin had a few player-driven choices to make, but not alear. alear is their own character. which is nice!!!

as for the life sim stuff, its very limited. the somniel is almost entirely optional. you can s support, but only alear can s support, and even then, NOT all of them are romantic in nature (see: pandreo and ivy, who both have romantic endings with alear regardless of their gender). if you choose, you can build and grind supports. the support convos arent always interesting, similar to awakening or fates, but they are cute and serve a purpose. but all that i just mentioned in this paragraph is not integral to the story AT ALL.

the story. the story is good, with some twists and turns here and there! we are supposed to get more characters and a new story option in wave 4 of the dlc (i am unsure when that is coming out!), and so the story might deepen with that dlc option. right now im doing a vanilla run with no dlc and ive been enjoying it thus far.

in short, im not DONE with the game, but i am REALLY enjoying myself so far. the battles are engaging (lol) and challenging (ive died on some skirmishes before :P), and i LOVE the characters, even if theyre not super deep. i hope the game has a satisfying ending and i suspect the replay value will be amazing, with all the unlockable classes there are :)!

id recommend you play it if youre a fan of fe, even if youre not crazy about the designs or the story. of course i cant dictate how others feel, but i actually enjoyed myself very much and remember to HAVE FUN and NOT CARE what ANYONE else thinks !!

[michibikionmain]

Sapnap's Lore Teaser: Assorted Thoughts and Ideas

we are just being FED sapnap content lately huh god bless i aint complainin its about time

JUST LIKE ITS ABOUT TIME WE GET THE SAPNAP LORE TEASER LETS GOOOO

I havent looked at it super in-depth yet, but I did watch it a few times through and I have some thoughts/theories/discussions to put out from my assorted ramblings in discord lmfao. theyre below the cut enjoy!! tw for torture mentions and fighting ig? nothing graphic or detailed but just in case :)

The glitching/flashing images over the community house for the ending segment aren't just of the community house, they're also pictures of Kinoko Kingdom?? IS HE- IS HE FORESHADOWING?? FORESHADOWING EITHER 1. HES NOT GONNA LET KINOKO KINGDOM END UP LIKE THE COMMUNITY HOUSE MEANING WE GET OVER PROTECTIVE SAPNAP ARC 2. HES GONNA DESTROY KINOKO KINGDOM BECAUSE, SIMILAR TO DREAMS DOWNFALL LEADING UP TO DOOMSDAY AND THE DISK FINALE, SAPNAP HAS REALIZED THAT GOOD THINGS DONT LAST ON THE SERVER, LEAST OF ALL FOR HIM, SO HE'LL GET RID OF THEM HIMSELF

The pathway hes standing on looks like the prime path or the pathways leading up to the prison. you can tell based on like the- the wood and chiseled stone bricks. hes near the community house in the end frame where he pulls out the sword. the fact that he pulls out a sword feels important as well because if he was just destroying things, he would use flint and steel or tnt or some other kind of destructive material. but swords? swords are only good for bamboo, cobwebs, and killing in minecraft. so hes definitely preparing to either kill or fight someone as he approaches the community house.

The flashes of kinoko kingdom that appear over sapnap looking at the community house in both the past and present lead me to believe that he's mentally connecting them, as in seeing history repeat itself, and that the symbols of his past memories are "gone" hence the title. So using that kind of inference, he's probably killing someone at the community house, someone that has some kind of connection to kinoko kingdom and probably doomsday or the past in some way.

that narrows things down pretty well in my eyes to Dream, George, Karl, Quackity, or Sam.

I don't think it's Dream. If he's going to kill Dream, why show the community house and not the prison or something? Or allude to the prison in anyway? I feel like their relationship will be an important factor in the Sapnap lore but I don't think that's who sapnap is planning to fight/kill.

Similarly, I don't think it's Karl. Yes Karl's in Kinoko Kingdom and is connected to memory and time and all that, but... he doesn't have the same connections to the past of the smp. He has a lot of lore but its mostly background type of lore i guess? its not tied to a lot of the major plot events, and while its affected sapnap, I don't think its gotten to the point of sapnap wanting to fight or kill karl yet.

George has been there since the beginning with Sapnap and Dream, so he's got the connections to the past, plus he's in Kinoko Kingdom with Sapnap. We also know due to his Dreaming lore that he still cares about Dream and wants him to come back and be with them again outside of the prison. He wants to ignore all the bad Dream has done because he cares for him more than he cares for the server overall. This could be an interesting conflict between their characters and I think it's possible, though unlikely because this is George we're talking about. My mans doesn't DO serious lore like this.

That leaves Quackity and Sam, who honestly id be satisfied with it being either of these two, but I think Quackity is more likely. I'll explain.

Quackity is not in Kinoko Kingdom, it's true, but this is a source of conflict for him. He's upset that he's not in Kinoko Kingdom, that his fiancées didn't invite him to their new country especially after spending so much time building a new country for all of them together. We also have many shots from Quackity's own lore streams which show him walking along that same path to get to the prison. Could be a coincidence, but personally? Personally I think it's an interesting parallel, especially when you take in to consideration that in Sapnap's prison visit lore stream he mentioned not wanting Dream to escape, but that he still cared for Dream and loved him even though he fucked up big time. Maybe Sapnap finds out that Quackity has been torturing Dream somehow and goes to confront him about it? This situation makes the most sense to me, at least compared to Sam

Sam lines up with the messages about the past and the community house and the connection between the original SMP/history with the current SMP, but he really doesnt have any connection to Kinoko Kingdom that I'm aware of. He could approach Sam possibly for allowing Quackity to torture Dream in prison, or something along those lines, but ehhhh Makes sense, would work for him to do that, but I'm not really sure how to tie that into the Kinoko Kingdom evidence yet.

No matter what happens though, I'm SO excited for Sapnap lore becuase I think his character is definitely one of the most fascinating on the server and yknow what? ill say it im biased i just think hes neat

[windowhateswildworks]

why you should play ajpw

ok so i know a lot of classic players like playing aj classic for nostalgia and because they dont like the artstyle as much of ajpw, and i was one of those for a while. however... this post is to maybe bring to light some stuff that i think makes ajpw fun and worth playing despite some of the minor downgrades from classic.

REGULAR UPDATES!!! this is probably the biggest reason aj classic players get bored of it and it was how i was as well. aj classic doesnt often get updates with new features and such, but ajpw gets frequent updates with new animals, new features like nightcycles and weather patterns, and items as well.

the vast majority of features and items are nonmember. it always stressed me out when my membership was ending on classic, since without membership you lose access to a lot of the game, but with ajpw most features are nonmember. you dont lose access to your dens or animals or pets when you lose membership status, and its more like a "pay once if you want this particular den/animal/pet" kind of thing.

pack runs. every month there is a different themed pack run, where you basically have to join other players and collectively search for little items or animals, like fireflies. when you collect enough, you get rewarded with armor sets as prizes. they are very fun and i like to zone out while playing a few every day. and no you dont need friends to do this, you can do it alone, or theres always random people waiting around looking for players to help them out in a run.

pets. this one is a general category because theres so much interesting stuff to do with pets in ajpw. first of all, i love how the pets run behind you instead of following exactly along like theyre part of your character model in aj classic. they kind of hop behind you and do their own pathfinding which is adorable. also, you can play with them and level them up, and put them in your den to have them walk around in a small area around where you placed them. they also can interact with objects in your den if you get their special toys, which every pet has 3 of. its super cute honestly and rn there are pet bees available which cost gems and not sapphires so def get them while theyre here.

surprisingly nice items and character models. they have snakes and shit and armor somehow still looks alright on them. idk how they did it. but anyway yeah the character models are really cute and have satisfying walk cycles that are fun to watch and use. and they have a bunch of armor sets that are honestly really good looking such as the dna armor set and the shadow armor set. armor sets also give you unique particle effects when you wear the whole set at once

a desktop app, and way less hacking. i know many people are put off by the fact that ajpw is mainly a mobile game, but it does have a desktop version that runs just fine with almost no lag and less problems with hacking than classic. seems like every week classic has a new issue with hackers, but mobile has been pretty stable which is nice.

and LAST BUT NOT LEAST..... if you join with an old aj account that hasnt used ajpw before, you get 500 free sapphires (a fucking LOT), a couple of free animals, and a free den that im pretty sure isnt in stores. honestly a sweet deal imo so if you have an old account it might be worth just checking out.

so check it out :) it sort of gives me the same nostalgia feel as being a kid and logging in on thursday to see what the new update would be, without the depressing atmosphere of a childhood playplace that is falling into disrepair. also i want friends to play it with so pls im so desperate

[s4ijoh]

CHARACTER ANALYSIS. OIKAWA TOORU

DISCLAIMER: this is based on my personal opinion. you have every right to disagree.

WARNINGS: suggestive themes

early on his teenage years, i think oikawa would be one to often mistake having a crush with being in love. therefore, he falls out of love just as fast he fell in - but dont get him wrong, he is still treating his partners with the utmost respect during their time together but once realization hits him, he recognizes he is wasting his time and he is not sugarcoating it, he is leaving - he learns to not get attached to any of his partners because he has seen many of them come and go + will start to grow frustrated with all these hopeless relationships. so he learns to not take them too seriously. his relationships were mainly boring and, to him, always felt temporary, like they were always missing something, some meaning (ill mention this further on!!) 

so, it is true he gets out of a relationship as fast as he got into it: and i think this is where he might get his womanizer reputation from, although that couldn’t be further from the truth - he is not on a selfish quest to satisfy his needs, he doesnt see every girl as someone to conquer. i dont think he is one to actively look for a relationship - if the girl likes him and he thinks she’s pretty, once again, he might mistaken his crush for love and get into a relationship w her, only to realize, later on, that he was not actually in love with her - nor is he one to actively seek for sex, like he won’t seduce girls to get laid. it might eventually lead to that point but it usually happens because it just seems people cant resist his charms and he usually ends up going with the flow. he wont persuade people on purpose tho, hes just being his usual genuine charming and flirtatious self. but dont think im delusional, i know hes not an angel, he will sometimes flirt with people just for the sake of it, no second intentions tho he’s just finds it fun to tease them a little.

that being said i also believe he started messing around very early. (+ im not sexualizing a minor, we all know people are having sex b4 theyre 18 so dont even get me started, ffs). i see him as someone who is curious about sex and so when he got into his first relationship, both parties agreed they were ready so they were like,, well, why not? honestly, it was not too bad but it was not great either, he was disappointed for it was not as extraordinary as he had expected it to be. was this what people yearned for oh so desperately, he doesn't get it.

eventually, when his first girlfriend breaks up with him he doesnt seem all too phased and gets over it in a couple days. - we have seen that on the anime, when his nephew mentions that his girlfriend broke up with him, hes not that bothered although im aware it might as well been him trying to hide his pain but, for the sake of this story, i dont think this is the case.

he learns that despite all his curiosity, sex is not something that is essential to him. on future relationships, he keeps chasing after that ecstatic feeling everyone keeps talking about - he wants to know what the fuss is all about - but to no use bc still, he can’t quite put the finger on it but, he is never quite satisfied, it lacks something.

and this, ladies and gentlemen, is where it gets interesting. i very much believe that, that something, is a strong emotional bond with his partner! he is a gemini mars!! and, bear with me here, it takes a lot to keep him interested but when he has sex with someone that he truly loves... hes whipped. like, the experience is mindblowing, hes immediately wrapped around your finger!! he will put all his effort into making sure your relationship lasts and!! as i mentioned before, hes not one to give everything up for a one night stand or whatever womanizer/fuckboy behaviour people always portray him to have. hes not playing games, he would never break someone’s heart on purpose. and now, that he thinks he finally found the one, much less. he feels it in his gut, that this one is meant to last and he’s definitely not letting go of you!

you introduce him to a whole new world! hes getting butterflies every time you come around, hes never experienced this before? the feeling is so strong and this baby feels so overwhelmed. is this what falling in love feels like? he now gets what people meant about the beauty of being in love.

he is definitely seeing the world through rose tinted glasses, now that he is in love, the world around him is so much more beautiful. he has so much love inside of him that he projects it onto every little thing. he finds beauty in the colourful leaves falling to the ground when autumn is just around the corner and days are getting shorter and suddenly, his walks back home are not as dull for he finds comfort in the dimly lit street, watching as fireflies cling onto the warmth radiating from the streetlamps - yes he is a romantic!

you will find this man talking about you to all of his friends which, despite popular belief, didnt happen regarding his past girlfriends because he had more important things on his mind, had other priorities, but suddenly he is all you can think about, his mind is inundated with thoughts of you! he has an ! urge ! to talk about you, about every little detail he can remember about you; how you snore ever so lightly or how your hands are always warm. he wants to show you off to all his friends and wants them to see how lucky he is to have you. he won’t shut up about you but honestly his friends are so happy for him they wont mind his never ending babbling.

in the end, even though life might eventually send the both of you on your separate ways, he will always hold onto the way you made him feel - he will never forget you were his first true love - and he is so thankful that he got to experience it in this lifetime with you. he is forever in debt to you for showing him what it feels like to be in love. you changed his life, as dramatic as it might sound for once he has experienced this kind of bond he is never going back to his old ways, he now knows what devotion is all about.

[toxicsamruby]

hello! i have to ask: what do you think about supernatural au's where monsters don't exist/monster hunting is not a thing? do you think the characters could even exist out of that realm? i honestly have conflicting views on this because on one hand i do enjoy the character dynamics but i also feel it would be wrong to just take away something that is fundamental to this show, idk though

i LOVE this question. thank you. im going to write a very long post now

obviously there are infinite ways to interpret a story, right? but sam and dean (and castiel too of course) as characters are completely inextricable from their backstories, and their backstories are inextricable from themes of transience, poverty, loneliness, violence, familial duty, masculinity, otherness, american protestantism, horror, humanity, and monstrosity. i dont think that it’s Wrong to take away the monster hunting as an element in the story, but i DO think it would be bad storytelling to do so bc the fact is that these characters w these personalities wouldnt EXIST without a few VERY crucial plot points/themes. and thats a GOOD thing!! say what u will abt the writers (and i do. i do) but the early seasons do an EXCELLENT job of building characters who are inseparable from their stories, characters whose every action is reflective of the Story itself in a bigger sense, characters who are interesting because of the way that they’re used to tell that bigger Story. there’s a sense of cohesiveness between character and theme and narrative, and removing one of these aspects would lessen the other two. that is the mark of good storytelling (that, in my opinion, distinguishes seasons 1 and MAYBE 2 from all the rest; although funnily enough i think castiel’s arc in s4 is the best example of what im talking about outside of s1-2. but anyways).

without these crucial themes and narratives, who ARE sam and dean? why do they even matter? what’s the value of them as characters? aus that strip away all those VERY important themes and plot points strip away the actual artistic value of the characters, and reduces them to objects of the audience’s emotional whims. the only reason u have any affection for these characters in aus is because you know and understand the source material, and you remember why those characters STARTED to matter to u in the first place. this is something that happens in a lot of fanfiction i think: the most essential themes of the original work are ignored for the sake of emotionally expedient scenarios where both writer and reader can clock out of having to do a bigger analysis of the story and just focus on, for example, a certain ship getting together and/or having sex, or a certain character getting a happy ending. and like i wont deny that theyre fun to read! they are essentially transplanting already-developed characters from their already-developed stories into a new fun scenario without the themes and narratives that actually made the characters compelling. and sure, sometimes a truly good author offers us a compelling new set of themes and narratives, ones that are interesting and make us think, but i’d argue that the characters in those rare good fics are 1. not...really the same characters from the show, since the story they’re in has been so completely transformed 2. basically shortcuts for the author to cut their teeth on writing original fiction. in any case, a vast majority of fics that remove the themes and narratives of the original story DONT offer a truly satisfying replacement, so the point is almost moot.

my answer, in short, is that aus without monster hunting destroy the character-theme-narrative cohesion that all good stories require, and by extension doesn’t require either author or reader to think critically about the story as a whole. you know that joke that goes around about supernatural just being a crate full of toys that we’re all sitting around and playing barbie dolls with? that is what the fics ur talking about basically are. it isn’t seriously engaging with a story as a piece of art, it’s grabbing a few barbies from a box and putting them in different clothes. and i think the fact that supernatural does fall apart both thematically and narratively so early in its incredibly long runtime is what allows people to treat it as a box of dolls, because most of the time it seems like the writers themselves treat the show as a box of dolls instead of a story that deserves respect and care and thought. so i actually do understand the urge to play with the barbies, so to speak, and to a certain extent i dont even think it’s a bad thing. but i DO think that sometimes, especially online, ESPECIALLY with a show like this where the lines between genuine engagement with the text and playing barbie dolls gets so blurred, people actually start to lose track of which is which, and THATS what irritates me. people start to view the ENTIRE STORY as just a way to see their personal favorite character do what they want that character to do. the character (and their emotional attachment to said character) becomes the whole reason for the story, instead of the story being the reason for the characters. playing barbie dolls is fine! but it DOES need to be balanced out with actual engagement, with literary analysis, with criticism if the story needs it (and my GOD does supernatural need criticism!), and there needs to be an understanding of the difference between genuine analysis and personal loyalty to a character. 

like, not to be a snob or anything, but it is important to engage truthfully and fairly with a text. things arent good just because you want them to be good, and stories can only offer you genuine satisfaction and critical/artistic growth if you truly engage with them. engaging with supernatural means thinking/writing about monsters and the Other, and to remove monstrosity as a theme and narrative hollows out the story completely.

[readingaccountability]

the queen of attolia - megan whalen turner

my playlist

final thoughts:

so unfortunately instead of following my initial plan of writing these before starting the next book, im basically uhhh 3/4 the way through book three and only NOW recording my thoughts on book two. best laid plans, i suppose!

anyways, book two i somehow enjoyed even more than book one, which i adored. the queen of attolia is much more political, and even more surprising, than the thief was. i think that its biggest risk is also its biggest strength- widening the scope beyond eugenides and becoming more intricate. the shift from first person perspective in book one to using third person in subsequent books helped with that a lot. though honestly i adore eugenides so much that i did miss being inside his head quite a bit. those rare moments of clarity where we understand whats going on up there are made ever more wonderful when there are fewer of them. that little bastard is just so great. his arc in this book was insanely incredible?

from here we are going to get more spoiler heavy!

utterly heartwrenching start to the novel. him losing his hand felt visceral, so well written, and his recovery was very well done i thought. not only because hes so petulant as a person already, but because the author shows the full transition as he learns how to navigate the world. later on when hes more sure of himself, it never feels unearned, because that always echoes all those moments where hes still adjusting and frustrated and tired. honestly the most emotionally satisfying aspect of this to me was when eddis and he are talking about how he is still the queen's thief, even if he might have different limitations on what exactly he can steal. it never felt like he was limited, just that they reimagined what the scope of plans were. though he would no longer be able to pull off the plot of the first book, due to the international nature of the second book, honestly he straight up graduates into a whole new realm. it was really thrilling to watch unfold!!

at first the narrative transition/revealing of his plans regarding attolia were surprising. i thought that he might be veering in the direction of planning to become king (despite really not wanting to) at a few different points, as the author is really good at leaving clues that dont feel overly obvious, or that just begin to pique your interest/attention. however i would not have guessed that he loved attolia. it was pretty clear that attolia loved him (all those little asides to what she was thinking about and it was always her checking up on him, etc? PEAK enemies to lovers plot thread) and i thought it would end up being reciprocated but not right out of the gate. at first i was a little uncertain but hoooo boy i love their dynamic (particularly now that im into book three pretty solidly- heart eyes) and i think that book two did a great job setting the stage for the next.

the setting feels much expanded upon, i particularly loved the time spent in eddis proper. eddis herself is such an incredible queen, and her dynamic with eugenides is sublime. her keeping the war from him, and by extension the audience, was great, because it also showed how he was keeping it from himself- eugenides totally could have figured out what was going on if he had bothered to. one thing i love about third person pov is that you might still be centered on one character, but since it isnt absolute, the reader can pretty easily forget that the info theyre taking in is still, on many levels, skewed towards the understandings of that character. those moments where that gets pointed out are always really revealing, i felt. absolutely amazing writing throughout.

another setting thing that i liked was the usage of the dystopia, and the plan that they came up with for traversing it. it was such a goddamn cool way of bringing back a really striking aspect of the landscape and then expanding upon it, 10/10 shit.

have i mentioned how much i love eugenides. he just DOES SHIT and i go insane! like yes, pretend to be holed up in your room and then take out sounis' whole navy and kidnap the magus in one fell swoop. i was hooting and hollering. also what a great way of bringing back the magus, i adore him.

the myth in the middle of this novel was also really great. i loved those interludes in the first book, and was glad to see the author bring back that motif in the second. im a big sucker for parables and in particular when you cant see how it ties to the theme until later on. i also loved how stunned the magus was to discover how personal tellings could shape the contours of the story. it emphasized how much of an academic he is, but was also so melancholy because of him having lost his family. the characters just feel so real, even the side characters.

attolia is absolutely amazing. i loved how every layer of her shell felt so realistic and needed as we learned more about her past... and as how ruthless she has had to be made more and more sense. killer queen indeed. and by god the contrasts between her and eddis were always so bittersweet. the fact that the ultimate, big difference, was in level of support? heartbreaking. eddis having that big family, advisers she could trust, people who loved her more than they feared her- aagh! the book so effectively shows us the comfortable setting of eddis and then contrasts in each glimpse we see of attolia. it also really effectively sets up the next book, which primarily takes place in attolia, but gotta save that for the next post. a good hint that i should sign off, i guess XD

[gamespritearchive]

yes i like fullmetal alchemist brotherhood a normal amount (<- lying) this post is going to be long so open the readmore at ur own risk

ok this is genuinely going to be a mess because im really terrible at summarizing things and organizing my thoughts so if ur actually gonna read through this then good luck!

here are just some short thoughts before the longer paragraphs

- i absolutely LOVE the note that plays right after the alchemists clap their hands together that indicates that theyre abt to use alchemy. the sound of the clap + the note that plays is incredibly satisfying

- the strong and well-written female characters in this show was a really good touch and i loved how they brought them (izumi and olivier) together at the end :') also their beefy husbands together was super nice too

- my favorite part of the story was actually the part where ed and al go to briggs because thats wher they introduced olivier. it was super nice to see her talk about how strong-willed she is and her army and all of that

- lan fan is another example of a strong female character but a little less favorable since she serves ling yao. that doesnt make her any less cool though she was super badass and i definitely cried over her more than once

- the details in this show was really nice. alphonse's body being malnourished was something that seemed really obvious, but the fact that when ed got his right arm back it was noticeably less muscular and had longer nails than his left was such a good detail

- in the last episode there was a scene where alphonse made a dumb face that was animated just like how ed's faces looked and that made me really happy that we finally get to see al emote just like his brother :')

- im pretty sure i cried through the entirety of the last episode because being able to see the characters laugh and smile without feeling burdoned by anything after youve seen them go through repeated heartache and physical pain for 63 episodes is a super nice feeling

- "i'm a terrible father but i want to make you two proud" .

- "i'll give you half of my life and you give me half of yours" UGH

- also right after this when ed was laughing at how flustered winry got because normally hes the one who gets flustered :') that was so sweet

- i literally guessed that it was morse code whenever they showed selim banging on al's head because its like why would they put so much emphasis on that and let it go on for like 10 seconds without any music over it. this happened like multiple times too and i guessed it before they made it incredibly obvious bye im the smartest guy alive

ok heres where i talk more besties lets go

fmab was absolutely worth watching 64 episodes. i was convinced that i probably wont finish it because i have trouble finishing 12 episodes but as it may be obvious i got super invested. fmab being this long allowed there to be enough time to explain aspects of the story separately and to watch them all come together at some point. it also allowed for a ton of details that even though they're small, they're still important to the story. they rehash a lot of points because it was a simple detail that could get lost through the story but when its rementioned and you recall the time, it's such a nice feeling to have that click in ur mind.

also the character development was really good and ill get more in-depth about characters later but the length of this anime also allowed for a ton of really good character development. it ties into the whole thing where you learn about a characters backstory and you don't understand why it's important to the show until later on and then you're like ohhhh holy shit that makes sense now! also all that time for character development also lets you get attached to more than just the main characters and makes you care more about the role they play in the story.

roy mustang. at first i liked him, but when he started to speak about how he wanted to become the fuhrer president before he knew the military was corrupt, i assumed that he would just become as corrupt as bradley was ("starting wars for no reason"). i was convinced for the longest time that he would eventually just turn out to be the second bad guy and that nearly came true whenever he was trying to kill envy but riza helped him :) i loved the entirety of their relationship they're so sweet and compliment eachother so well. the scene where roy demonstrates the sheer amount of trust he has in riza's abilities by blindly (heh. he was blind during this if u didnt know.) following her directions and hitting their target ... it was just so good. also even though i didnt trust roy i thought he was super badass the sound of him snapping was always super satisfying as well

i almost want to rewatch fmab because it would be really nice to pick up on things that were later referenced in the anime. because of how long it is, its super easy to forget about things that happened early on in the anime (especially for someone with memory issues lol) so being able to watch back with the second half of the show still fresh on my mind would be almost an entirely different experience. the first thing that comes to mind is whenever we were shown kimblee in prison super early on. i know he had dialogue but i remember nothing about it because i was focused on thinking "literally who the fuck is this guy lol" but now i know. wow.

edward elric. im aware that this is going to be incredibly biased but i literally do not care. anyways. character development is always important and needed within a story but i genuinely feel like ed's character development was interesting to watch. it was never super obvious and his core values never changed. he did somewhat have a change in attitude when he nearly died to kimblee, but thats like expected you know ... being that close to death and all. i think that event was essentially the beginning of the end of his naivety. he was always consistent with the people he cared about though :) he never stopped calling them stupid and weird and he never stopped threatening to punch hohenheim whenever he was frustrated even if they were like in the middle of like a life or death situation. i just think he's neat

when ed destroyed pride('s vessel) i felt my heart well up with. pride LOL. that was his very first explicit win against someone who has been against him this entire time, and seeing him defeat pride with his own two hands was such a nice feeling. it wasnt technically his own win since he was only able to get to that point because of his friends and family around him

episode 60 was suuper good it was the part where the father was gonna swallow god because of the solar eclipse. its super hard to explain if uve never seen it but basically the scene was super cool simply because of how well the animation showed the sheer scale of what was happening. like this guy was literally reaching to the moon. theres a lot of unnatural things that are shown in fmab and although this scene didnt introduce any new concepts, it was still incredibly captivating because of how well the animation was

aand thats it i think! i regret not writing down how i feel during the earlier episodes but i think watching it with little to no distractions was a better experience. if u actually read this im giving u a kiss on the cheek rn ilu

[cattles-bians]

exes au part 15

post directory

em: viola teas i am like. incapable of sleeping in

em: i woke up 10:30 on the dot and i thought. what the fuck

em: 10:30 is especially offensive bc it means the mcdonald’s breakfast is done

obsetress: brain immediately said viola up and about doing all the chores vacuuming with no sympathy for her constantly sleeping in snoring girlfriend dani clayton

obsetress: but nah i'm sorry for you that sucks

em: inspiring deranged viola behaviour is

em: the greatest gift of all

obsetress: god so true when u think about it

obsetress: not that viola vacuums, she def has cleaners but

obsetress: actually no

obsetress: she has cleaners but she's prob not satisfied and gets out her expensive vacuum she has no idea how to use and is clattering n making such a fuss

obsetress: and poor dani

em: she’s up and about rearranging things, she’s causing a ruckus,

obsetress: dani's like "you have just as bad insomnia as me and you're just... getting up? that early?"

obsetress: viola shrugs "i don't need that much sleep"

obsetress: "you do, though"

obsetress: she shrugs and disappears into the kitchen

obsetress: insomniac gf and insomniac gf

em: insomnia gfs

em: viola runs on like

em: supernatural element carrying over: viola is a little too good at running on no sleep and no one knows if she ages

obsetress: YEAH

em: i love a sorta, grounded real life show w like one or two unexplained ambiguously supernatural things that no one blinks at

obsetress: i was gonna be like

obsetress: i wonder what dani and viola do when theyre up not sleeping at night and then i was like

obsetress: Well,

obsetress: no they do that but they also do the most random borderline unhinged shit like

obsetress: dani tries new baking recipes and they sit on the countertop in their pjs or underwear or nothing and eat scones at three am

em: go for night drives

em: night drives aren’t even unhinged but they’re nice

em: but they don’t listen to music they listen to fucken podcasts

obsetress: that fuckin lorde song

[em note: it's supercut]

obsetress: they go to the roof and dani lays her head in viola's lap and stares at the stars while viola reads to her in french

obsetress: ugh i put it on oh god why did i put it on

[em note: it's still supercut]

obsetress: in my head.........

obsetress: i do everything right............

obsetress: when you call............

obsetress: i'll forgive and not fight.............

obsetress: ours are the moments.........i play in the dark OH MY GOD VI'S INSOMNIA AFTER DANI LEAVES AND SHES ALONE

em: ur a MONSTER

obsetress: i need to lay on the floor and put this song on repeat

obsetress: anyway um

obsetress: another thought from when i was thinking about the vacuum like

obsetress: viola has a degree of learned helplessness that all rich people have but she's not an idiot like the rest of them yknow and i think like

obsetress: she had to do a lot when she and perdita were kids!

obsetress: after her mom died

em: hannah......

obsetress: and then after her dad died before she married arthur and like

obsetress: then being a single mom (viola lloyd single mom i'm drooling) even w all the help she can afford

obsetress: she has a chip on her shoulder and Does Things For Herself but also just

obsetress: sometimes it happens! there's never enough time and never enough help!

obsetress: and she loves isabel so much like

obsetress: viola making isabel her lunches

obsetress: oh god

em: making her little lunches at like 2am bc it’s been a busy day and she’s tired and she’s sore and she’s sad but the one thing viola will never skip is like

em: making sure isabel gets her lunches

em: hey what is wrong with us

obsetress: GOD YEAH

obsetress: EXACTLY

obsetress: HOW DID YOU KNOW I WAS THINKING ABOUT HER MAKING THEM AT TWO AM UGH

obsetress: anyway um yeah viola making isabel her lunches at two am

obsetress: i know that i wrote jamie leaving flora notes on her napkins but like

[em note: read 'and she taught me a lesson alright']

obsetress: i just think it's something a mom who really loves her kid and wants them to feel safe and okay would do so i want to say vi does it for isabel too!!! and what of it they're different universes it's fine

em: ur just building the hannah obsetress cinematic universe

em: building up some Themes and Motifs

obsetress: themes motifs and symbols

obsetress: anyway viola packing isabels lunches she writes little notes and puts on lipstick n kisses them

obsetress: so isabel can get a kiss from her mom

em: im going to kill u w my bare hands

obsetress: cut to vi in the bathroom wiping it off later à la jennifer check

em: im GONNA

obsetress: sometimes when vi has to go out of town for business or w/e she leaves a stack of napkins with arthur to put in isabel's lunch so she can still get a kiss from her mom even when she's gone

em: thats so extra??

em: its so viola

obsetress: exactly

obsetress: she definitely has a fear of isabel favoring arthur over her (abandonment issues etc etc)

obsetress: gestures at canon

—-

em: dani 'its casual' taylor

obsetress: leave the typo

obsetress: dont you dare change it

em: i need u to know that i DO fuck but

em: hgfngjkyhGJBJKFHD FUCK

em: ruined my own joke

obsetress: in the most spectacular way

em: dani 'i need you to know i DO fuck but im accepting offers' clayton

obsetress: she takes care to drop that like

obsetress: it's just casual SHE'S not anything serious. i'm not dating HER or anything

obsetress: jamie's like dani i know you're gay you literally stare at my lips every time i talk

em: dani getting off the phone and dramatically rolling her eyes like 'ex girlfriends, am i right? whats up with these women i-' and jamies like love i get it

obsetress: jamie raising her eyebrows "how many ex girlfriends do you have"

obsetress: dani's like "well, just the one, but"

em: but i COULD have more. if i wanted to. bc i am looking to date more women

em: jamies like ok cool

obsetress: jamie, a little too casually: oh? any, uh. prospects?

em: danis like (patented nervous dani lip bite) maybe but

em: jamies like drat

em: jamies like darn

em: and then she gets home and shes like

em: wait

obsetress: jamie calling dani back "when you said maybe"

obsetress: and dani immediately is like yEAH?

em: jamies like do you think you could ever be interested in me and danis like umm. yeah.

em: jamie hangs up like ok cool

em: long beat

obsetress: oh my GOD

em: REDIALS

---

obsetress: ok last thing i was gonna say

obsetress: i meant to say this earlier and got distracted a hundred times over

obsetress: but um imagine dani helping isabel with her english homework

obsetress: vi helping isabel with her math homework

em: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

em: SOFT

obsetress: well,

em: oh no

obsetress: isabel needing help w her english homework post dani and vi's trying to help and vi's smart n all but

em: get HELP

---

em: dani 'hooking up w my ex is actually a v girlboss of me' is SO funny to me

em: when they get together danis like, oh but havent we all- and jamies like nooo i have very good boundaries

em: except for the perdi vi psychosexual power play ig

obsetress: moment of weakness

obsetress: who wouldn't want to hook up w their hot boss

—

obsetress: when dani goes up to london whatever weekend like friday night to get her closure dinner with vi

obsetress: boom haircut and therapy reveal

em: 3 day bender u say

obsetress: all of a sudden it's sunday night and

obsetress: YEAH

obsetress: they spend

obsetress: all fucking weekend

obsetress: in vi's bed

em: sighs dreamily

obsetress: dani playing with her hair

obsetress: "this is nice"

obsetress: "i'm gonna miss your bun though"

obsetress: vi's brain is short circuiting at "i'm gonna miss"

em: later danis like look. jamie. what would you have done? and jamie chokes on her beer and splutters 'not fuck my ex for 3 days straight?!'

obsetress: dani "well you've never fucked v–– oh wait"

obsetress: "you really can't blame me, jamie, you KNOW" jamie: (grumbles)its different... dani: well i mean i guess, technically, you didnt,

obsetress: unrelated in some bad fight at the end vi is like "you can't go isabel needs a–– you're like her–––" and dani's like "a what? say it" and viola's too stubborn and proud and hurt to say it

em: just perpetually bouncing back to the worlds angstiest break up

obsetress: i don't know WHY

obsetress: as someone who HATES ANGST

obsetress: i am so DRAWN to these two

em: its ummmm weirdly cathartic??

em: the whole exes au is based on a joke about them being friends and exes. we are v firm in like. viola and dani reconcile!

em: idk i love a catharsis moment! i love it when a character claws their way to happiness. or even begrudgingly goes to therapy

em: viola can go through a little hell as a treat

obsetress: turns out the only one who could fix her in the end

obsetress: was the one who said it's not my job to fix you

em: dani transformative power of (platonic) love

obsetress: "Platonic"

[ocdhuacheng]

the beef.... and the leaf..... :(

okay so this is going to be really incoherent but i have lots of thoughts that are being thunk and im Feeling Everything At Once so youre going to have to deal with it

1) love that both he xuan and shi wudu are water gods/ghosts. its poetic u_u

2) where is sqx????? where is he xuan??? where is shi wudu’s head??? is he xuan just gonna keep shi wudu’s head as a trophy or smth? lowkey within his right to do that its creepy but its also kind of metal and whats the use of a man if hes not a bit unhinged. idk why but i was getting the image of pitou just sitting there with kites head, and i can imagine he xuan doing the same thing. ANYWAY, DO THEY EVER COME BACK??? I STILL HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS. and also! do we ever meet new earth/water/wind masters?

3) anyway. I LOVE HE XUAN. i feel soo bad for him. like lowkey i was totally on his side for this entire thing. like im not going to excuse him killing the actual earth master and stuff, but i feel so bad for him it hurts and if i were a character in this book i would have helped him. and obviously if i were him, id do the same thing. do you think he completely hated sqx? like its obvious he hated them, but he also followed them around for centuries, do you think theres any amount of fondness in him? I personally think there was. He didnt want to kill sqx, he gave them opportunities to leave, but I think it was only when sqx refused to leave their brother that he xuan was so hurt and betrayed. I think thats the reason he was so cruel to them at the end. if he xuan still had any positive feelings left for sqx after all the chances he gave them he wouldnt have made sqx and swd ruin eachother. he wanted to make both of them hurt

4) i also really like shi wudu, like he really is a terrible person, but i love characters that will do awful shit for the ones they love, but he did get what he deserved at the end and that really was the only way for his character arc to end. he definitely wasnt making it out of this alive. that being said, his death scene was BRUTAL. it was so good but also it HURT SO MUCH. and the way he went crazy at the end and tried to kill sqx in some kind of messed up mercy homicide/suicide, OOF.

5) and sqx: i love them so much. they really did nothing wrong. they had no idea! and when they found out they were furious and went crazy and wanted to descend to being mortal so badly. like theyre a good person and i also feel really bad for them. However, the fact that he xuan gave sqx the opportunities to abandon swd after they found out, and they still chose to try to help their brother, must have been a big blow to he xuan. But tbh I cant really blame sqx for doing that either. love is complicated and theyre siblings and theyve been together forever and supported eachother for so long, its hard. they know what swd did is wrong, and i dont think they were trying to get swd out of facing the consequences, but I think they wanted swd to get punished the right way, instead of through some unfortunate timing with his calamity. i cant blame sqx for loving their brother just as i cant blame he xuan for hating sqx. emotions are complicated.

6) so anyway. point is i love both sqx and he xuan so you can imagine the kind of pain i was in

7) the water and wind temples getting destroyed was so sad. like. its so final.

8) also the way he xuan worshipped the real earth master was so interesting. worshipping him to keep his spirit subdued is such a cool concept, was it genuine? i dont think it would have worked if he xuan’s worshipping wasnt genuine. im not even going to pretend to know how to explain this.

9) anyway that was the most satisfying and painful revenge arc ive ever read. its definitely my favorite arc so far but also THAT SHIT HURTED

10) anyway im gonna go lie in the dirt for a day or fifty

[pomegranates-and-blood]

🎵everything’s coming up ivar🎆🎇 what a morning of fortunate revelations for him! i know i must say this after like every chapter, but you have truly done such an exceptional job building up these characters and this relationship. there were so many neat little tie ins to other things i noticed in the story! and every other line, i was just struck by how well theyd come to know each other. i remember after the first time he broke a bone (and smth similar in ch36??), she thought something to the extent of “if i try to push him on this, ill just hurt him. if i don’t, then he’ll just accept this situation as immutable, so im at a loss.” but she absolutely could not miss in this chapter. after all this time together, she knew exactly what to say—and he finally felt like he could completely sincerely trust her! “Of course you wouldn’t leave, he knows you wouldn’t leave him” 😣🥺😭 he’s got a new certainty!! also cracked me up to read half the lines and think “you’re gonna give him a heart attack!!!” only to move to the ivar pov to find that he was in fact having a heart attack. i Love that for them💕 sub ivar is like inspired choice #17266 for this fic but damn!! does it go hard you do just an excellent job!

it’s been such a convincing and satisfying journey for them. theyre really doing it!! i feel like my child has learned to ride a bike. you have been cranking out bangers only since the hiatus so thank you very very much for another fantastic chapter!!!❤️(bit of a tangent but i briefly looked up some baseline historical symbolism for lavender bc i was so struck by freydis and the mint smell and i wanted to get ahead of the game and like the first meaning that comes up is silence lmao—somehow i don’t think that’s it so ill have to keep looking!)

OMFG ILY  ❤️

I’m so happy you liked the newest update! That morning was A Lot™ for Ivar lol, all positives but still, his mind tapped out halfway through Gǫfga and none of us can blame him, poor guy was a tad overwhelmed lol. And yeah, her not really knowing if she should push or not is a thing that happens a lot (that will happen a lot more in a certain AU lol) because there really is no way to navigate around that until there’s the established trust and vulnerability that they have by now.

I’m so glad the fact that he now holds on to the certainty of her promising to stay by his side was noticeable!

Omfg yeah, the inside of Ivar’s head anytime she started talking was probably just a loop of a very loud alarm going off lol

I’m so happy you like sub!Ivar, it is a blast to write him actually surrendering to his lover like that. I cannot see him any other way to be honest, especially with my priestess. She’s been thinking about making him hers for a long time: “Even after he has imprisoned you, it would be a lie if you said you didn’t wonder what it would take to have the Viking underneath you, or the different ways you could make his proud façade crumble."

Thank you so so much for your kind words, they mean so much!! I am so happy you have been liking this so far, and that you enjoyed the latest updates. Thank you so much, you wonderful person!

I answer your intrigue about Lavender under the cut by the way, if you’re interested. It is not as interesting as with Mint and Freydis I’m afraid, but if you were curious as to why Ivar lingers on it, and why specifically Lavender, under the cut is the (very rambly, but that’s expected of me by now lol) answer 😉

As for the lavender, I commend your resolve to get ahead of any plot twists, but surprisingly this isn’t one. Lavender is actually the scent she uses in her baths, and thus her skin smells slightly of lavender. In a deleted scene of one of Ivar’s PoV’s it goes into how he has started to relate this slight lavender scent with her so much that walking into their room already makes him feel like she’s there even if she isn’t; and in his newest PoV he just lingers on it because it’s just one more way she clouds his senses.

As for why lavender? Ah, that’s where my irrational need to research everything comes into play. Lavender is a flower that symbolizes Persephone first of all, and it was (according to some of the sources I handled) one of the flowers used in the temples in Ancient Greece, so for the Priestess it has a strong meaning regarding her faith (and her retracing Persephone’s myth in the Goddess’ role, but she doesn’t know that lol). Also, Lavender was fairly common, and it has a lot of medicinal uses, including relaxation and the such, but most importantly for this story, it is one of the many herbs used to heal burn wounds. Lavender was one of the flowers used on the Reader (and that once she was better she used on herself) after the Eleusis thing, and either consciously or not she uses it still, it is a source of comfort in a way.

Cause here’s a thing/headcanon of the Reader/Priestess that really means nothing but I always snuck into my work: she is a healer first and foremost (is the one thing across all AUs and all the places she has been that remains consistent, from the Roads to Greece to Kattegat and beyond, in Nostalgia, and Hope and Alatheia and all others), and her insistence on keeping plants close to her is mostly because she wants life to be around her in a land like Kattegat, yes, but it is also because she trusts/relies on the herbs and what she can do with them. Her own sword and shield, her own way of fighting, like Sieghild told her in the flashback of Ch 33.

At the beginning of her time in Kattegat, stretched to her marriage to Ivar even, she mostly just kept plants like Lavender, Poppy, Summer savory, Field scabious and the such, which are all used medicinally to treat burns and as antibiotics. She is more scarred by what the Byzantines did to her in ELeusis than she would like to admit, or that she ever would in her PoV, that’s why I like sneaking in comments by Ivar and Freydis in their PoVs about how she flinches when someone breathes too much life to a fire, or how when she feels unsafe (even when she is freezing her ass off, bc she is not used to Scandinavia’s cold) she sits far away from any fire. Keeping plants like this is her way of irrationaly wanting to keep herself safe if they ever do the same thing to her again, even if it is incredibly unlikely. Slowly, she starts to be able to let go of that, and really all that remains by now (~Ch 42) of those plants is the Lavender.

When she marries Ivar (and more importantly when she starts truly caring about him) she starts keeping plants like Comfrey, Chickweed, Buckeye, which are used for broken bones or for rheumatic/arthritic pain, or for pain general, like Willow or Elderberry. Freydis makes a point of it in “Until spring comes.”, of how she has been relentless on keeping both the common/accesible ones like Comfrey and Willow around, but has also secured plants from the East, like Ganglong (which was traditionally used for bone fractures). Again, the plants and her ability to heal is her own way of fighting, her own way of keeping the people she loves safe and protected, limited as it may be. Which, around Ch 31 she uses (in a different way) to try to keep the man she loves safe, which is by making the wreath of flowers and praying to her Gods.

And once she really starts settling into her life in Kattegat, even if she doesn’t realize it, she no longer keeps plants only for the use they may have, and brings things like that Marsh Violet (that as far as my limited reseach told me has no real medicinal uses). Her own way of making the world around her a little more hers is by putting plants around her and caring for them (she did this in the Roads a lot too), and with time the stubborn little shit accepts letting this world make her a little theirs too by caring for plants like that one.

You are on point that I use plants and symbols a lot, most of them you know about by know. Ivar/Hades and snakes, Melinöe/Freydis (especially once the revelations of Ch33-34 happen, which is when the Minthe parallel comes to an end and she embraces the role of Melinöe in the Priestess’ eyes now that the lies are discovered) and howling dogs, Hermes/Galla and hawks/falcons. I used Snowdrops a few times I think, towards the beginning, which was a little nod to Freyja’s myth and the Priestess’ threading the line of it, because I like the parallels between some of Freyja and Persephone/Hecate (which by some sources could sometimes be intertwined, or one and the same, much like Melinöe and Persephone).

Anyhow, sorry for the long-ass answer, I hope it doesn’t dissapoint. I really cannot put into words how happy it makes me that you’d care enough about this story to search the meaning of lavender, thank you so much for your support, and for the undeserved love you keep showering me and Nostalgia with! Thank you so much sweetheart!

Sending you my love!! ❤️

[another-bedeviled-murdock]

1, 5, and 25?

Howdy!! Thank you for the ask, I'll put the answers under a read more for ~neatness~

1) Tell us about your current project(s)  – what’s it about, how’s progress, what do you love most about it?

Right now it's mostly my self indulgent WIP that's a crossover of Billions on Showtime and Marvel's Daredevil based on what started as a joke that Bryan and Wesley are twins (theyre played by the same actor). My vehicle for this is I have Matt a twin named Abigail.

Progress is good on it, I'd say! Since just the daydream notes on it are well over 50k atm (don't look at me lmao)

I think the thing I love most about it is simply diving into the Meta of it all. What physical supplements and adaptations would mutants need? How do the two universes intersect? (surprisingly well is the answer in that one lmao). And of course, just the absolute self indulgent SOFTNESS of it tbh. The addition of Abigail allows for new avenues for healing and closure for Matt, for interesting interactions with Wesley, and just overall as a positive (mostly) role in the story! Did that sound weird? I hope not lmao.

5) What character that you’re writing do you most identify with?

To be honest, it's sort of caught between Abigail, who is my own character and as such absorbs pieces of me as is inevitable, and Bryan, who I already related to (but both of them are MUCH cooler than me I promise).

Abby I relate to bc they have so much going on, it's a time of change for them, but also because they picked up some of my habits in the process of fleshing them out. They stress cook and show their love through food, and they're kinda silly to be honest, but they're tough. They're a fun character to write.

Bryan obviously isn't my original character, but I find him fascinating and would LOVE to be his friend. He's a fucking nerd and really enjoys what he eats and is a Super Nice Guy. (He keeps emergency deodorant in his office in case people need it. How nice is that.). Especially since when you dive into it, his interest all seem vaguely out of left field and he's almost contrary when you least expect it but really SHOULD have (he can be a Bitch when he wants to be, which is almost exclusively to The Obscenely Rich or The Asshole Rich, so like. Mood)

So to (finally) answer the question, I suppose I simply relate to the characters I can pick their brains the most lmao. I'm kinda funky in my thought processes and really like to get in depth with thought processes, so I relate the most to characters with a lot going on (😑) since I can do that with them. But I also relate to them both bc they're an interesting mix of Things I Am, and Things I'd Like To Be. Does that make sense?

25) What part of writing is the most fun?

Well, I kinda said it in the previous two questions, but I like diving into the lore and the world building and the intricate introspection! I think it's partially because I find human emotion so vastly complex and dazzling and vaguely confusing but I really like to put the work in on fleshing out the how and the why of characters emotions.

Like how do they deal with grief? How do they show worry? What emotion do they not know how to handle? How do they offer comfort or react to being comforted? It's so fascinating to me to try and build an entire person out of scraps and thought, you know?

And similarly, I really like setting out clear rules for how the world should work, probing the limits and testing what holds water and what doesn't. For instance, what kind of diet changes would the twins need for their powers? If they're operating on a higher level of physical stress and performance, than it stands to reason they would need to eat differently to back that up, you know?

I think the other part that's most fun is deciding what to add simply because you want to. Like, I love the world building, but it also super satisfying to say "This Happens Because I Want It To" you know?

Thank you so much for the ask, anon! I had a pleasant bitch of a time trying to figure out how to formulate answers 🤣!

I had fun with it though 😊!

If anyone would like to ask about a different WIP, you can also do that! Just specify it's not about A&B and I'll know what you mean 😆