#i love these though lol bc i love being dramatic and talking about myself haha

[lynxandbadger]

Rules: Answer these 85 questions and tag 20 people

I was tagged by one of the best people ever @cosmicdnp !!!!

— What was your last…

1. Drink: Water

2. Phone call: My roommate’s sister bc I needed directions to somewhere

3. Message sent: “Yes! And it’s right across the street from where I already live so that’s nice!”

4. Song you listened to: Man On The Moon -- REM

5. Time you cried: Can’t remember but like last week or something or maybe yesterday idk

— Have you ever…

6. Dated someone twice: lmao i’ve never dated anyone

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: No

8. Been cheated on: No

9. Lost someone special: Yes

10. Been depressed: Yes

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: No

— Fave colours

12. Dark blue

13. Purple

14. Dark red

— In the last year have you…

15. Made new friends: Yes

16. Fallen out of love: Romantic love no, but a different love yes

17. Laughed until you cried: Yes

18. Found out someone was talking about you: No

19. Met someone who changed you: No

20. Found out who your friends are: ??? mate idk i know who my friends aren’t but idk who my friends are 

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook friends list: No

— General

22. How many your Facebook friends do you know irl: I don’t have Facebook

23. Do you have any pets: Yes, cats

24. Do you want to change your name: Not anymore

25. What did you do for your last birthday: ??? I don’t remember i went to class and probably procrastinated homework? It was just a regular college day but I opened a box from my mom

26. What time did you wake up today: 10 am

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: Watching Friends

28. What is something you can’t wait for: Short term I’m getting my hair cut Saturday and I’m pretty zazzed for that

29. What is your favourite animal: Cats (but if that’s boring I really like red foxes and stingrays)

30. What are you listening to right now: Where The Wild Things Are (Monsters) -- Anarbor

31. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: lmao for super personal reasons this question is a bitchy fuck but anyway yeah

32. Something that’s getting on your nerves: Tons of deep annoying shit but to be light and chill, I’ve almost finished all my Easter candy and I want more lol

33. Most visited website: Tumblr (unfortunately)

34. Hair colour: Naturally black but I dye it

35. Long or short hair: Short

36. Do you have a crush on someone: No thank god

37. What do you like about yourself: ??? i’m trying so hard to think of something lmao um...... i like that despite shit tearing me down im still doing stuff? idk man this is hard

38. Want any piercings: Part of me wants a tongue piercing but i could never pull it off lmao

39. Blood type: I dont think i’ve ever known my blood type tbh

40. Nicknames: I don’t have any Edit: according to Naomi my nickname is janice 😩

41. Relationship status: Single

42. Sign: Scorpio

43. Pronouns: she/her

44. Fave tv show: Friends

45. Tattoos: None

46. Right or left handed: Right handed

47. Ever had surgery: Yes

48. Piercings: Just my earlobes

49. Sport: Haha as if i had any athletic talent lmao

50. Vacation: ??? idk but i really wanna go to europe

51. Trainers: idk is this about shoes because i only own converse

— More General

52. Eating: The last of my Easter candy lol

53. Drinking: Water

54. I’m about watch: More Friends

55. Waiting for: My hair appointment on Saturday lmao

56. Want: To be happy

57. Get married: ??? idk maybe someday but im not that zazzed about the commitment you know? like id love to think id find someone i’d truly love to spend my life with but how would i know? even if i love them then, people change, things happen, and you can never know what the future will hold so like??? idk man im just so scared of commitment also the social construct of marriage annoys me and i dont really wanna have a wedding or anything and like phil said in that one sims video marriage is just a piece of paper and like??? it’s too hard to decide beforehand what ill have for lunch like i cant be thinking about marriage lol also ??? it reminds me of other things id rather not talk about and it kind of ruins it so yeah basically idk why i made this so long but marriage is a no for me lol

58. Career: ??? fuck i dont even know if im studying the right major dont ask me what i wanna be for the rest of my fucking life thats too hard fuck

— Which is better

59. Hugs or kisses: Hugs

60. Lips or eyes: Eyes

61. Taller or shorter: I mean i’m short so like anyone shorter than me would be really short so taller i guess

62. Older or younger: Older

63. Nice arms or stomach: ??? i always hate these like romantic partner preference questions bc i dont even care

64. Hookups or relationships: Relationships

65. Troublemaker or hesitant: Yo fuckin idk man

— Have you ever

66. Kissed a stranger: No

67. Drank hard liquor: No

68. Turned someone down: No

69. Sex on first date: No

70. Broken someone’s heart: No

71. Had your heart broken: No

72. Been arrested: No

73. Cried when someone died: Yes

74. Fallen for a friend: Well like a naive little crush yeah

— Do you believe in

75. Yourself: i mean it depends but usually no

76. Miracles: No

77. Love at first sight: No

78. Santa Claus: No

79. Angels: No

— Misc

80. Eye colour: Dark brown

81. Best friend’s name: i dont heckin have a best friend my dudes !!! :(

82. Favourite movie: I haven’t watched a lot of movies but i like Heathers, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, and V For Vendetta (lol that’s quite a variety i didnt realize lmao)

83. Favourite actor: idk i dont watch enough movies to know good actors but like everyone in Harry Potter is pretty great

84. Favourite cartoon: i haven’t watched any cartoons for years so idk

85. Favourite teacher’s name: Tom (first name but i only ever call him by his last name lol but that’s generic enough for tumblr haha)

I don’t tag anyone because idk who likes doing these but if you want to do it, pretend I tagged you!

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Hi! I really like your blog. Your analysis posts about ships or other things are really interesting and your gifsets are super cute! I have just finished reading your two anime recommendation posts and I was wondering if you plan to write a third one about the remaining animes you like? I would LOVE to read it.

Hi:) Thank you so much! Haha these were more like “bromance anime recommendations” lists. I’m glad you liked them romances. Here’s part 1 and part 2 :)

14. Hakkenden Touhou Hakken Ibun.

The relationship of the couple in this anime are one of the best on so many levels. They’re one of those “even the darkest part of me can’t hurt you” superior ships. They’re two of the main characters, 2 out 8 of the reincarnated warriors (who are all handsome af haha) that are meant to.. you know… save the world.

They’re both on the verge of death at the beginning and one (Shino) in order to survive agrees to live with a demonic sword inside of him which prevents him from growing old and growing per se (which is really sad for many reasons plus you’ll see him once in his 18-year old body and he’s so gorgeous), the other (Sousuke) takes half of a life from a dog, so he can tranform into it whenever he wants.

The problem is that during all of that Sousuke has split and lost his shadow aka the dark part of himself. His shadow works for the dark side, but all he really wants is Shino. The most amazing thing is that Sousuke loves Shino so much, that even his dark part would never ever hurt him. Like his shadow does some pretty terrible stuff to others like once he has made a deal with a girl so she would gave him her eyes just because Shino has said that they’re pretty lmao (I’m sory but its kinda funny), but he gets so pissed when Shino is hurt. So it’s the same as Akashi & Kuroko and Gauche & Lag: even for the darkest part of him the other one is his weakness. 

Also this is one of the animes where LITERALLY the power of gay love saves the world by the end. (p.s. sorry, Genpachi, I love you the most and I know you like Shino too, but your flirting can’t beat such deep feelings lol).

15. Assassination Classroom.

Not gonna spoil anything about plot, so I’ll say it’s about “problematic” kids trying to kill their teacher who has superpowers and that’s it. This anime is full of controversial stuff, like I really questioned things and what’s right or wrong, but one thing for sure is that no matter of what you think about the situation, you will 100% cry at the end. I personally think it’s a kinda happy ending considering all the stuff, but opinions are very different when it comes to this anime.

Now for the ship. Let’s just start with the fact that both Karma and Nagisa have ehhhh… psychological problems haha (but who doesn’t in this anime? lol). So Karma is a sadist (like for real, he likes to get creative with torturing) and I think he’s also a yandere when it comes to Nagisa. He threatens to kill those who even talk bad about Nagisa and once has almost beaten to death those who bullied him (which I didn’t mind tbh lmao). He never does anything if others ask, but when/if Nagisa says “please”, he immediately says yes (which is also funny). 

They both are in awe with each other and think the other one is absolutely incredible so it’s like a two-sided fan club. Karma is really scary, but when it comes to Nagisa he can be fluffy af. He also doesn’t care about people much, but Nagisa is his everything. Like the “I give up” moment will melt your heart, that was so cute. 

So this is one of those “you’re the only exception” ships. Bc Karma is a person who will enjoy skinning ppl alive, but when he’s with Nagisa he likes to hug, pick him up and coo about Nagisa’s height, play tag, discuss his fav movies and tickle fight. I’m like… I’m just… this is great.

16. Bungou Stray Dogs.

This one is about a detective agency where everyone has superpowers who are “enemies” with the mafia group where everyone has superpowers, but actually they’re all friends and half of the detective agency date the mafia xD (I’m sorry, but it’s the truth). Like I still don’t get why they won’t just make one organization, this is getting ridiculous.

I’m not a huge fan of the anime per se tbh, because like it has way too many characters who I can’t even feel for cause supposedly they’ve had a dramatic past, but what past nobody tells, so I like can’t empathize to someone who’s an asshole without knowing why he is that way. Plus there’re many characters in animes who have had a horrible childhood/past but are incredible people (hello to Todoroki and Levi). And some characters there for some reason are degrading instead of progressing which is the worst for me. But it’s pretty entertaining to watch if you won’t think much about stuff, powers are cool and it’s drawn beautifully (but there is one scene that was repeated 28 times 28 TIMES!, we’ve counted just for laughs, guess which xD, that’s like.. they could’ve made time for a whole new episode instead of this)

There’s one character whose progression is so incredible though that I’m happy to watch just for him. It’s Akutagawa. He’s like grown so much and I love everything about him, how he went from trying to kill Atsushi to risking his life for him and letting him use rashomon, how he’s homey with his sister and how he’s so good with feeling his powers, how Kyouka tried to kill him and he was like “I’m so glad you’re happy now”. Bitch, like that’s the character progression I’m asking for! Man, he’s just… he’s my favorite, I love seeing many sides of him. He made me so happy in s3 when I was ready to turn it off lmao

So there are two main ships in this anime. Dazai and Chuuya. They are one of those perfect combinations. But not in a usual way you think.. like characteristically. Chuuya’s full power is uncontrollable and the only one who can stop him is Dazai, cause his ability is to nullify other’s abilities, so he’s the only one who can stop Chuuya and also save him from being destroyed by his own power. So basically Chuuya trusts Dazai with his own life when they work together (which is.. I’d be scared if I was in Chuuya’s place lmao). It’s not like I’m scared that Dazai’s gonna let him die or anything, but stuff like “let’s watch a bit longer how Chuuya is going nuts cause it’s funny” doesn’t seem funny to me.

Let’s just say, I do ship them, I think they’d be perfect together if Dazai was like a fanfiction Dazai, you know. But the truth here is firstly their relationships progression is zero to none, like yeah, it’s fun to watch them bicker, but it like won’t give you any deep feelings. Plus Dazai was the most humane and emotional when he was with Oda (which I really don’t get, Oda was a dumbass tbh, like who makes a children shelter while working in MAFIA???! ofc they were fucking killed). Like Oda’s so special for him but then he treats Chuuya and Akutagawa like shit. And he had more feelings for Oda’s matchbox than for Chuuya in the last season. So my heart just won’t lie there fully, you know. Because there are no moments there that indicate like he’s the one for him.

Now to Akutagawa and Atsushi. This is a classic enemies to lovers stuff. Like they go from trying to kill each other to risking their lives for each other. They warm my heart on so many levels. So they’re both struggling to get over of their past and can’t. But then by the end they help each other to let go of their demons, they give each other what others couldn’t. Like I still can’t believe Atsushi came in like a wrecking ball and said the words Akutagawa wanted to hear for ages (his face, his face lol he was like “w-w-what?”). Atsushi himself admitted that Akutagawa is his cure in the last season. 

These two are like also hilarious bc they both think that they’re trash so their arguments are like “you’re the best”, “no, you’re the best”. Like Atsushi literally goes “Akutagawa is so strong and amazing, but he still thinks he’s weak” what a bae xD and Akutagawa thinks that he’s nowhere as good as Atsushi so it’s really funny. The relationships progression is like insane. They went from beating each other into a blood puddles to covering each other from bullets and being like “honey, don’t you dare die, I was going to kill you myself” lol

I still can’t believe Akautagawa gave Atsushi rashomon… he was wearing rashomon. I mean his ability, which is a part of him was okay with Atsushi using her. I mean.. maaaaaan fanfiction does come true! And they’re like the representation of yin and yang characteristically and even appereance-wise and I think it’s super cool. Plus the “lawnmower” is the cutest pet name I’ve ever heard lol

Anywho, this anime has like 20 bromances, so pick whichever you like.

Damn, that got long and I’ve only mentioned 3 haha, sorry. That way it’s gonna be like 50 parts xD

[justmikerrss]

to all the boys that will *never* love me:

Dear christian, stephen, mikio, oscar, royce, pat, manny, derrick, mars, gill, rex, max, kevin, and nick -- whether y’all were a crush or someone i saw myself being in a relationship with get ready bc i’m going IN. I’m gonna use this time to rank these catastrophes from level 1 to level 5. level 1 being a crush yenno not so bad or scarring, and level 5 being sad machine playing while the world is burning to pieces like bish you left a MARK on my heart. if you know me i think you know who that person is hahaha

*alexa, please play truth hurts by lizzo*

christian - level 1. lol let’s take a trip down memory lane to my first crush ever!! my gosh i remember being so kilig over this boy in elementary school at st. leander lol it was so obvious. hahaha. your spikey hair and like goofy ass smile i don’t know i was such a sucker for that. the first filipino boy i ever crushed on waow <3 but then I left st. leander and never spoke to you again. you went to o’dowd, i went to sjnd and that was it really. you went to sfsu i went to usf. idk how we ever found each other on insta, but it is so cute to see posts of you and jasmine haha a USF don as well!! the last “convo” (i wouldn’t even call it that) was when i commented on your graduation post and you commented back thanking me and saying congrats too. so happy that your trillest brand is killing it and you know nothing about me anymore but what a great time it was to know you were my first crush ever lol. thanks for this <3

stephen - level 1. lol i left st. leander and moved to sjes and was like ok, who am i gonna crush on now?? hello stephen, my first white boi lol. i knew fosho that you thought i was weird in elementary school like there is a particular time where in church i sat next to you and during the our father you did not want to hold my hand LMAO and that’s when i knew. i stood from afar. touched your thumb for heads up 7 up HAHAHA gosh you were so out of my league and such an asshole tbh. you and nick, forever making fun of me for liking mikio lmfao hate y’all forever. you went to lmu and that was history. lmao you were so mean to me. but all well. you were like not a good person i think i just liked you because of your looks? lol hahaha

mikio - level 2.5. oh my god the epitome of my boy problems in high school lmfao fuck you. jk. but high school mika wouldn’t take that back. oh myyyyy what a FLIRT were you. i had so many fantasies thinking we’d be together, we’d be m&m HAHAH BARF wow, and then you dated mel and it was just like??? then you were my escort but then i was like nope and switched you with ryann LOL suuuuper crazy like I don’t really remember the details of everything but i knew in high school being so kawawa over not being noticed by you. but then you went to davis, slo, and now in sl?? idk where you are now but you had my heart back then (barf) but that was such a long time ago that honestly it doesn’t phase me anymore!! a feeling high school mika wouldn’t have thought was possible. so thank you. i liked you because you gave me little glimmers of hope of like maybe we could be together -- you were nice, flirtatious, close to your family... not afraid to make a fool of yourself for the one you’re interested in. which wasn’t me but again that’s okay! I wrote a letter to you didn’t i? idk what i was doing why was i so dramatic tbh. you did things that honestly weren’t in my control so i can’t hate you really. again realizing that you fit my type so it just, idk

oscar -- level 1. when mikio was being a butt i knew i could crush on you. LOL the hugs, the convos, being able to laugh at anything when you were in the room what a time SJND was when you were there. now you’re in boston with your boo and i’m still really regretful over not being able to see you when i was in boston last year but it’s okay. happy that you’re happy out there :-)

royce and pat -- level 1.5. ah. USF college times man. these two were literally a duo. RA’s of the 4th floor (share yall are silly for assigning that haha) and damn, what a trip it was to crush on you. royce you were a dj so thats how i knew my thing for dj’s came. you both did your jobs at ra’s, pat you were on eboard so i saw your hustle there which i super appreciated. and this is also how i knew filipinos were my type? lol. EVEN THO YALL WERE LIKE WITH BOOS lol i am cursed but yall had hustle, swagger, passion for what you love, and still made time for partying it up and studying. and now i see royce at parties sometimes n i would awk hug him (rip at the phoenix hotel party) and i havent seen pat since he graduated but hes so happy with becca!! so cute. and its cute (and weird) how kierst is happy with royce.

****DJ SPARKY/AGANA/YURI -- level 1. yall are dj’s who i will always cringe at bc of how naive i was at shooting my shot... BUT IM GLAD YOU ALL ARE THRIVING OK LETS DISMISS THOSE BOIZ NOW 

manny -- level 2.5. ahhhhh manny manny manny. my first trip towards using dating apps and matching with someone on TINDER!!! LOL!!!! ok anywho i met up with you for a few times and it was just like... a lot of question marks bc i didn’t really know where my standards were when it came to online dating. we went on dates? but the first time i paid, and the second time you “forgot your card” so i paid again?? and then you walked me to my dorm and kissed me on the forehead?? red alert!! then you kept wanting like a second chance, to prove me wrong and i kept ignoring you bc wtf lmao... then i was foolish to let you into my life again and realized that was a mistake and blocked you again. and now you’re like a bonafide dj living your edm dreams. i saw you at audio TWICE omg rip. i liked you because lol ur filipino, a dj, buttered me up a whole ton which again problematic bc i didn’t see any of it within myself... but its okay mika is better now. better to not be talking to you. but thank you for being my stepping stone into dating apps.

derrick -- level 1. omg at times i forget about you! which i don’t know is a good or bad thing but i don’t think i ever told anyone about you lol. we met on okc, this filipino boi (lol a trend) andddd i went on like two dates with him? one, i met up with him at that one coffee spot near golden gate park. then we walked over to ggp and we just talked and thinking about it now it was very ideal for me to be myself fully, in public if that makes sense. you were so nice and genuine omg. we went to sweet maple the second time around and you paid for the food which was like wow!! diff than manny!! and i remember talking to you about kh and you loving it as much as me. but i got scared because you were like 26 or somn? i was still 20 i think and i was like this dude might be asking a lot out of me...so i told him the “this is on me i don’t feel ready and not sure how i feel” spiel. and that was history. i honestly don’t know what he is doing now but he was really nice. i felt no malicious intentions from me, i just wasn’t ready to move forward w him. the first nice guy i ever let down bruh. ugh.i hope you’re doing well now though.  

mars -- LEVEL 5. fuck me i hate this chapter SO MUCH lmao. so many drunk cries and just cries in general post this whole... like chapter. but lets start off with why i liked you: handsome as hell, close to your family, athletic, hustled, SO MF KIND EVEN WHEN I WAS BEING CRAZY, a great homie and bf quality, gave me the false hope of like “yeah ill see if i can come through” “ill let you know when i listen to this” the forever ILL LET YOU KNOWS but still views my stories and still doesn’t let me know mentality.... you never initiated any of our convos. i was STRAIGHT pursuing you even though i didn’t believe that you’d change your mind about just seeing me as a friend. you made that clear to me from the start but i didn’t take that as an answer LOL which is why i was so crazy to keep hanging out with you... even tho you were super busy and i felt like a burden you STILL made time with me, whether that was peruvian food, or thursday nightlife followed by dancing at a bar together (which i ruined when you took me home and asked you about your love language lmao), souvla, and then our final time of seeing each other: san tung and tpumps. what a fucking few months that was...only to come out of it with another girlfriend with the same name as me. LIKE WHAT. ARE. THE. ODDS. i still can’t believe it till this day. my gosh you were so nice to me mars. such a great homie. and i wasnt empathetic or smart enough to make diff decisions to retain what we had...but im happy that you’re happy with mika. other mika. yeah. man i never felt so in the dark when going through this time, this was so rough. i wasn’t eating, i’d cry in bed for days, it was so bad. i’d like to say that I’m healed from that though. lol to burning the shirt which honestly i should have kept bc it was a cute shirt.. but yeah. thank you.

gill -- level 1. lol you were dumb to think i was attractive enough to dance with at the soulection event. we exchange numbers and i think because i told you i was 21, you backed off. lol guess i was a fetus then. still am. lmao. we text for a bit but then i find out you tried to get into arcilla’s pants?? lMAO. oh and then i see you at that pool party, saw you talking to other girls and i broke DOWN bc i was crossed as hell LOL sorry ate kayla that you had to take me home that day LOL ugh i hate myself for that night. and then i see you right in front of me at OSL. in 2019?? for childish?? that was such weird weird fate. thank god you didn’t recognize me (i had long black hair there, you remembered me with short brown hair plus it was dark). i just thought it was crazy. uhm you had the fuckboy vibe and look on point.. knew everything about soulection. family oriented. but it just fizzled bc i blocked you and then just stopped talking to you lol.

*****chris l/frankie -- level 1. again i cringe at how dramatic i pursued yall sorta as crushes but for sure bc yall were soulcycle and about fitness YES bodies 10/10 and you understood soul. but omg chris pls get ur life together (which is what it seems like ur doing??) and frankie well you’ve been having your life together being married and all so0o0o0 im trash for crushing lmao BUT IM GLAD THATS ALL IN THE PAST AND THAT WE’VE FORGOTTEN i think lmao

rex -- level 0.5. lmfao you were dumb you’re gonna keep looking at me and emily only for me to make the move in letting you know i was interested, follow you on ig, and then you block me?? weirdo. bye.

MY HINGE BOYS </3 

Max -- level 3. oh maximus lmao. we talked for a whole month and what a pleasure it was to text you every day, receive and send memes, curate playlists, be w/ each other at different events... only for it to end after we netflix party/facetime where i don’t feel the kilig i’d feel when texting you. so i told you i wanted to be friends. and then i try to still reach out and be friends, but i got delayed responses to no responses. and now you just, look at my stories? lmao i know it don’t mean shit to look and you recently liked my post, but i feel like i invested a lot into our quarantine reality. you had GREAT music taste (even tho ur playlist was a lil questionable), for all i know you were just telling me things to like get you on my good side, motivated, privileged......... yeah. i hope you find your 5′0 qt rave queen that can go to events with u

KEVIN -- level 1. lmfao honestly you SUCK hahaha even with the benefit of the doubt, it does not take 10 hours to reply...even if you are busy at work NICK AND MAX WERE ABLE TO!!! you were spotty to begin with but then we netflix party and then you dont talk to me anymore after i ask if we could exchange music playlists? i didnt even ask u to be my boyfriend its a fucking playlist.... we talked about music so much. ugh BOYS ARE SO DUMB LIKE SERIOUSLY. hope amazon treats ya right

NICK -- level 4. ugh. ughguhgughgh. i liked you because your profile/resume was all my criteria: music taste A1 bc of bryson, i hated mint chip, i loved spongebob (even tho you NEVER sent me spongebob memes fuck u), you were hapa (he he but fuck u) (i laugh while typing this i am so dum), uhm. yeah. we talked everyday consistently for two weeks. you were such a joy to text bc you were funny (i was funny too), even tho it was hard to keep the convo going w you at times in the beginning because you never inquired about me at times. max did. its like you were better than mars, but not like A+ in replying like max was. you never really flirted with me? lmao i mean even those attempts of me tryna bait you, i always got... friend vibes. benefit of the doubt maybe you just didn’t know how to flirt but you had posts of your past relationship up on your feed so you cant tell me that that exp did not have you pursue a girl and flirt her up. to me, there was no initiative from you. i was chasing you for sure. this dating life is a two way street -- life doesn’t work where one pursues you only otherwise like no. bet if i went the fuckboi approach, gave you lame responds would you have kept the convo going? prolly not bc ur a cancer and want to feel needed. the only thing ill commend you on is when you’d apologize for delays in text messages but then you kinda stopped that. like understand i should also feel like i should be pursued and never did i feel that i felt like you just responded just to respond... like you’re a cancer its in your nature to dive deep and ask deep questions but you never did, you were the type to play video games with your pals LMAO and like/????/? me understanding gamer life i was like YES this boy gets me but like CMON. lol so many things. ok maybe i am reading too into this but this is the freshest heartache :/ you never like told me i was cute or anything like... max made remarks about my looks and you never did. i mean cool maybe you were just vibing off my energy but i just now question if you were actually interested in me? bc i was trying so hard to make you like me. every meme, was a move. you didnt play your cards right!! its like i kept hitting you with plus fours, and then all you’d put down is the same color number card. where was the fun in that? it was super effortless but anxiety filling for me at the same time bc i was convinced that you were the one. :’/ super good news to hear that you wanted to meet virtually literally NO EXPECTATIONS but then monday rolls around, you dont text me the whole day, i check in at 530, you tell me you go to costco instead and want to reschedule bc you thought i was ghosting you????? wtf did u just like expect me to just call u right at 7 and expect u to be ready?? max texted me after work and was like “we still on right?” so i was high key expecting that from you bc 1. show interest and 2. take initiative but you DIDN’T!! so i was honest in telling you how i felt but kept it light and asked to reschedule. you take forever to reply, but when you do you tell me it was silly OF ME to think you were supposed to confirm it which i get i initiated it i shoulda texted you earlier (but what if i had the worst day ever and couldn’t text you??? would you have just let it be and not text me anymore bc you assumed i ghosted you???) you also said that you thought maybe it was too quick to assume that i ghosted you which is YES tru. however i was not going to apologize for not texting you earlier and waiting for you to reply bc boy, that was on you to make a move to double check. if i was in your shoes i woulda texted. that would indicate to me that oh wow this boy is making sure we are meeting and confirming! even drop a hey hows your day you excited for tonight? i made it obvious to hype you up on your photos and everything, you just were like wow your photos are so good! wow i hope you posted that picture! like idk. i kept it light bc i still really wanted to meet you, and just wanted to attribute this small ass thing as a misunderstanding between the two of us but after long hours of making me wait, you decide you don’t want to reschedule because you were unsure of how you were feeling and that you couldn't put your all in and said sorry. no sentiment towards wanting to be friends just a straight goodbye which basically meant, in harsher terms im prolly not as down as you are for me and maybe i am nervous to meet u (idk ill never know if you were) anddd im not interested anymore bc you’re crazy and ME being the womyn that i am ended up being the mature one and said the goodbye hope you have a good life without me text and then our lovestory ended lololol what a great two weeks am i right? honestly maybe you still need to do some growing buddy but relationships are not easy going they are a two way street but also ill never know maybe you were just texting me just to text me and you still wanted to be the nice guy bc you were scared of how invested things would be post call so you call it off and it was just in the moment for you to be down but then have it change on another day.... i woke up in a better headpsace today about how this turned out but like god fucking dammit i had high hopes for you you infj CANCER. *squidward voice* so thanks. thanks for NOTHING (this is when you start your spongebob dialogue of all how to get everyone on board for practicing for the bubble bowl and sing sweet victory)

so, the end LOL basically. to all the boys who will never love me, ultimately thank you for being a part of my life. thank you srsly. thank you for making me exp the pain, the kilig, the uh everything. growing pains these are, but at the end of the day, i hope you have a good life. whether or not we cross paths again this gives me clarity as to what i’m looking for and what i deserve. this goalgetting, resilient, funny, hardworking, awkward but in the best way pinay is a force to be reckoned with!!! she has the best support system out there!!! she has so much to live for because she is determined to not let down anyone counting on her!!!! so fuck u for missing out on that!!!

k. my ideal man list is coming soon. until then... see ya later.

xoxo,

Mika (allison to some)

[hanabiira]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme.

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

My muse is:   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless /

Is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES (??)/ NO / IDK.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES (as a captain, by default she should be considered strong. Whether or not people take that seriously is another question lol) / NO / IDK.

Are they underrated?  YES / NO / She’s an oc. lol.

Were they relevant for the main story?  YES (but only in my head lol) / NO 

Were they relevant for the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

Are they widely known in their world?  YES ( again, as a captain, she ought to be known by at least name, whether people acknowledge that is another thing as she is an OC) / NO

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

How strictly do you follow canon?  — I’m a little bit of a stickler when it comes to following canon. I do it to the best of my ability and try not to bend the rules to much to the point where it may seem far fetched. As an OC, I’m inserting something made up and non-canon into something canon. For me, I want her to be as believable as possible. I want her to fit in with the rest of the characters and story without disrupting that original story too much. 

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.  —  In canon, there’s no character quite like her in Bleach. Bleach has a surprising amount of rather diverse female characters, but I really liked the idea of having someone who was strong, at their top of the game but wielded an ability and set of skills that is classically “feminine”. Her love of flowers, gardening, and being soft and gentle doesn’t compromise her ability to lead or to fuck up your shit. She’s honed her skills so much she can turn the division into something of her own, much like Urahara did by turning the 12th into the research division (a specialization that remains even after his exile) and made a name for herself that is wholly unique. 

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).  —  People may find her interests boring or on the surface, her avenues of interaction repetitive. Maybe they can’t see their character interacting with a captain or someone from the soul society. Maybe they find her bubbly and friendly personality boring to interact with, because they prefer dramatic or angst driven story lines. 

What inspired you to rp your muse?  —  I’ve had Miki for a long ass time. Her original inspiration is shallow and embarrassing, so I’m going to pretend not to acknowledge it and simply say that I really wanted a shinigami that had a flower based zanpakuto. Like literal flowers, not just the aesthetic of flowers (like Byakuya). 

What keeps your inspiration going?  —  The people that I rp with frankly! I love my gorl, but it’s the other people I really write with that help bring her to life in a certain way. Oh no. My answer is just “the friends we made along the way” lmao. 

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO.

Do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO. (I’ve written quite a few over the years, the longer i go on the rarer they tend to get) 

Do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES  (I like them, but I haven’t written any in a long time!) / NO.

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day?  YES / NO.

Are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO.

Are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO.

Are you a sensitive person?  YES-ISH / NO.

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?  —  I’m always open to constructive criticism. I think without it, it’s hard to grow as an artist/writer (I’m leaving this thought of Lainey’s bc I agree lol). But its one thing to come and bash when you are only scraping the surface level of someone’s portrayal. Like, you can’t come to me and offer “criticism” if you haven’t bothered to read all the information that’s available to my character. As for my writing in genral, I welcome it. I’ve never professed to be a strong writer, I actually never really liked writing when it came to school, it is not a flowing talent for me like it is for others. I know sometimes I can get stuck in loops or sound repetitive. Sometimes I sit there and I know the feeling I want to portray but just can’t come up with the right words. So really, if you know of a way to shake that up, tell me! 

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character?  —  Yes!! Though sometimes I feel brain dead and don’t know how to answer lol...but I do my best! 

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?  —  I mean, unless it’s something that blatantly goes against something in canon, since she’s my own character no one can really say shit. 

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?  — Tell them they can go if they don’t like it??  I understand that she will not be everyone’s cup of tea and can’t possibly hit everyone’s boxes with her but...if she doesn’t vibe with you I don’t need to hear it, you can just go and not interact with me, lol. 

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?  —  Obviously, since she is a character of my own creation, I DO want people to like her. I also realize that not everyone is going to like her though, by virtue of people being people and her characterization. We all have preferences. If you really HATE HATE her I’d maybe like to know why..because that seems like a really strong emotion and naturally we are curious. If it’s like “I hate her bc you make titty jokes sometimes” then get outta here, lol 

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?  — Yeah, please, just fix it for me if its in a reblog. I’m pretty good with grammar but sometimes I just miss stuff and don’t catch it before it goes to post. Do me a solid. 

Do you think you are easy going as a mun?   —  I”d like to think I am very easy going, but I also subscribe to the stupid idea that no one actually wants to talk to me, so I tend to keep to myself a lot and I find it hard to get really friendly with new people. I have my handful of people that I know I can say anything to, but it’s taken a long time to get there. But seriously, I don’t bite. I am a nice person. But also, don’t just come up to me and be like “whats up” and then when I respond you’re just like “cool” and nothing else. Fuck outta here with that. 

That’s about it, congrats for filling out!

Tagged by:  @elxfi​ Tagging: Do this if you have an OC haha

[jamilelucato]

Gentleman [T. Hiddleston] | Pt.1

(gif not mine, please give credits to the rightful owner)

Pairing: Tom Hiddleston x Actress!reader

Request: @anon Hey girl, the body swap series are amazing!! I want to send a request, haha (I know probably you have a lot more, but take your time hehe) So I want a Tom Hiddleston x Reader where the reader is an actress too and kinda hates him bc she believes that he being a perfect gentleman is an act but they have a movie together and she kinda falls for him and doesn't know how to apologize for her past actions and how to confess but he is this sweetheart and they start dating, pretty please 🤞👀

Summary: Tell me, have you ever had a gentleman?

y/N worked once with Hiddleston, and she’s not even a little prepared to work with him again. They can’t stand each other, at least that’s how she sees the things. And now, with this new movie coming up, will she notice the truth hidden by Hiddleston politeness?

Next Chapter: July 21, 2018

A/N: Yey, I’m back and once again, I couldn’t avoid writing a series, but this will be a short one (at least that’s what I believe lol)

*all the nominees and winners from the People’s Choice Awards were not truly the ones who actually were there or won

**Wait for The Ante is a fake movie I invented for this fanfic

(just ask if you wanna be tagged)

Permanent Tags: @katelynwithpaint @nephalem67 @wonderwall23s @i-dont-wanna-go-mr-stark @sighspidey @starlightfound @just-saying-26 

my masterlist

“You don’t know the honour it’s to be up here, holding this trophy... This means so much to me and it’s all thanks to my fans, they are the love of my life, I love them so much, they are so supportive, caring... Thank you for....”

Oh Lord, I couldn’t stand one more minute of Hiddleston’s speech, but there was nothing I could do besides rolling my eyes and puffing.

“Could it be any longer?” I remarked with my best friend “Does he know that the People’s Choice Awards is not the Oscar?” and I smirked at the end of the sentence, hoping to see she holding a laugh.

Jennifer Lawrence did not laugh at my joke. Instead, she looked at me like she was my mom just about to scold me. "You are only saying that because you won nothing this year" she debated, raising an eyebrow.

"As if!" I muttered, rolling my eyes once again, and this time she laughed, probably because I sounded just like Alicia Silverstone in Clueless.

"Well, I can't say I'm sorry because I won over you on Favourite Movie Actress" she smiled, showing me the trophy.

"Nah, you deserved it" I crossed my arms. "I have only four movies, and they are mostly Marvel's. The only girl from there that could have won was Scarlett"

"Oh, but Me Before You won on Best Dramatic Movie, so you won something after all"

"Yeah, but I was a secondary character that had four lines, which means one-minute on screen... I will not count it" I smiled back at her, and she passed one arm around my back.

"Hey, next year, it's you, I'm sure," she said, comforting you and you noticed Hiddleston left the stage.

"I am sure" I echoed, staring deep at Tom's eyes while he passed on the corridor just alongside my seat. After the exchange of looks, he smirked in the dark. Thinking I didn't see, Hiddleston, I thought to myself while Jennifer let go of me.

"Did you saw him laughing at me?" I asked Jen, calling her attention.

"Who?" she replied, turning to face me.

"Hiddleston" I answered impatiently.

"Tom Hiddleston? His seat is not even in this direction, why would he use our corridor?" her eyes were confused and she started looking behind us, to see if she could find his seat.

"How do you know where is his seat?" I asked, distrustfully. Jennifer was a walking disaster, she wasn't able to memorize her own seat, who'd say someone else's.

"He was next to you when I saw the map but I asked to change his seat with mine" she clarified like it was nothing the fact that the most pretentious person on earth had a seat next to mine.

"Does he know that?" I held both of her arms, really confused at this time.

"Know what?" she asked.

"That our seats were close to each other?"

"Oh God, are you guys like declared enemies?" she lifted an eyebrow again, but this time without the mommy look.

"No, but he can't stand me." I pointed out. "I can't stand him either"

"But aren't you guys in a lot of movies together?" she asked while I let go of her arms to face the stage where the next category was being announced.

"Two movies. Marvel movies, which means we don't see each other all the time" I remarked "We are both villains so we only met in one movie, on Ragnarok, and only because my character was sent to Sakaar, and Loki was conveniently there. We kind of made a deal and all... Haven't you seen the movie?"

"You know I can't keep up with those nerdy details" she replied, turning to face the platform too. "Anyway, in one movie you got to conclude that he hates you?"

"It's not that hard to notice," I stated.

"Hm, excuse me, but it took me three movies to discern that the poor Josh had a thing for me" she commented, defending herself.

"Josh had a thing for you during Hunger Games??" What? I am a Joshifer fan.

"Can you be quiet? He's here!" he reprimanded.

"Sorry" I ducked. "Anyway, Tom Hiddleston doesn't like anybody, that's why he's an almost-40-year-old with no marriage records"

 "A very hot almost-40-year-old" she corrected and I grimaced. "You cannot deny his hotness"

"Fine, he's kind of hot"

"Kind of? He is the hotness itself!"

"Eww, it's like you have a crush on him!" I pushed her away from me while she laughed like a crazy "Please don't tell me you watched Ragnarok because of him and not me, your lifetime best friend"

"We've been best friends for 18 years only" she smiled funnily. "I have a crush on him since his first movie"

Jennifer and I became friends at a very young age because our parents were very close friends, and I always considered he family — even though, when she was raising in Hollywood, she bypassed me for a period.

"Thank you very much, Jennifer Shrader Lawrence" I rolled my eyes.

She started coming close and hugged me tightly "You know I'm just kidding, y/N"

"Yeah, I know... Tom Hiddleston's first movie is a little younger than our friendship so..." I hugged her back but she pushed me a little to face me.

"You don't stand the guy but you know how long has been since his first movie... Indeed, love and hate are close friends" she chuckled.

"I know because I used to be a fan of Thor's cast before becoming famous and all" I defended myself, trying to take me out of the bed I made myself.

"Yeah, right" she would never let me go of that one.

¨

"Well, now the award is over... let's head to the party?" Jennifer said to our little group gathered at the red carpet.

"Thought you'd never suggest it!" Emma Stone smiled walking in front of us just so she could be the first to enter our rented limousine.

Hailee Steinfeld, the youngest of our group, stepped up to meet the car, but Jen stayed behind like she wanted to say something to me.

"You know who is going to be at the party, right?"

"Oh, shut up Lawrence!" I looked at her madly while she had the happiest face on, and although no name was mentioned, I knew she was talking about Hiddleston. Or at least, he was the first to come to my mind.

¨

"Yeah, I know, things are never as welcoming as home, am I right?" Justin stuck me with him in a boring conversation about welcoming places, but he hadn't noticed my bored face, so I decided to interfere in a ruder way.

"This dance floor sounds welcoming enough, I'm going there now, bye!" I didn't even face him, I just rushed to meet Jen who was dancing to the sound of a remixed version of This Is What You Came For. "I am gonna kill you for leaving me with Timberlake!" I shouted.

She simply smiled and held my hand so I could dance with her, but I didn't have that lot of moves. "He is right there dancing, so you should dance too!" she whispered loudly in my left ear, When I looked at her confused about who was she talking about, she pointed a suited man next to Robert Downey Jr., both doing weird dancing moves but having a lot of fun next to the Hemsworth brothers.

"Is that..." she didn't allow me to finish.

"Thomas Hiddleston, the man" she smiled.

"How did you managed to get drunk in the twenty minutes you left me with Timberlake?" I asked, noticing she was more than her normal happy.

She shrugged. "I have my ways"

Chris Hemsworth notice my presence in the crowded dance floor and he gestured for me to come closer to the crew since more Marvel actors showed up in their little group.

"Go! It's your chance!"

"For the last time, Jennifer, I do not like that stuck-up, liar and fake gentleman!” but I headed to my favourite Chris anyway.

"Hey, y/N! Missed you at the presentation, were you really there?" he asked in a joking tone as usual.

"Very funny, just because I won nothing" I faked a smile "Really smooth"

"Hey, it's the little fairy" Benedict hailed me with my old nickname, inspired by my character on his movie.

"Hey, Strange Doctor" I smiled while he patted my back and I did the same. "See you all are gathering around, what is it with that? To show everyone what it's like to be in a Marvel movie?"

Chris Hemsworth brother laughed. "Excuse me then, I'm not Marvel one"

"Sorry Liam" I smiled. "But the Hunger Games girl is right over there if you wanna feel welcomed" I pointed at Jen who was dancing closer to Stone.

"Wow!" his brother laughed, pushing Liam.

"You had that coming, boy" Hiddleston smiled, joining the conversation.

He stared at me while I purposely looked away.

"Being a Marvel member is all about outclassing other actors" Downey pointed out, hugging with one arm Benedict.

"Well, if only I knew that earlier, I'd have become a villain years ago!" I shouted when the music became louder.

"Lucky me, I was there from the beginning" a smirked Hiddleston said and I stared at him with a boring face. Who asked you anything, brat?

"I was there from the beginning, thank you very much" corrected Downey, unleashing from Benedict's arm. "Now, I'm going, bye kids"

"So early?" Benedict complained.

"I have a wife, you know" Downey smiled.

"I thought I was the only one" Benedict pouted and we all laughed, but with Robert gone, the little group started disassembling.

"Want something to drink?" Hiddleston whispered loudly close to me and it shocked me since I didn't notice his approach.

"No," I said, rolling my eyes, trying not to sound rude but it was involuntary at this point.

I looked at his white teeth in the dark. "You didn't have to be nasty"

"Yeah, whatever" I grumbled, and suddenly started to dance to the song now on, trying to make him disappear from close to me.

"y/N, from a girl who worked with me before and is going to work with me again, I did not expect to see such a reaction..." he started and got my attention.

"What you mean again? I was not asked to come back to Infinity War" I justified.

"Oh, no but... You are the main character in Wait For The Ante, so..." he looked more confused than me.

"What you mean Wait For The Ante? I did not get that part! Well, at least I got no calls back..." I started thinking about it, but no, no one had told me a thing about Wait For The Ante. 

Tom looked at me, waiting for a better reaction to be made, but there was none so he continued. "I saw in my script that we were gonna be working together a lot next month so you could try being a little nicer to me..."

But I wasn't really paying attention to anything else that was coming out of his mouth. In the heat of that moment, all I could think of doing was kissing that man's cheek for saying such a good news to me.

That discovery had totally made me feel better, and the fact that I was probably gonna be the one to take care of Jennifer didn't even see to matter.

When I looked back at Hiddleston, he was stunned, and soon as I realized what I just had done — kissed the cheeks of my nondeclared enemies —, I ran away from him, pretending to scream for Lawrence when all I wanted to do was found a quiet place to call my family about the new part I had won, because this was a ritual of mine.

I finally found a peaceful spot, way away from the party but it was okay. Talking to my parents was more important. That was until I looked at my phone's screen and realized it was two hours past midnight, and I decided not to call them because they were probably sleeping.

I can't believe I got that role!, I thought by myself, so happy I was gonna be the main character in a movie for the first time. I mean, when I was in Doctor Strange, I did had a part bigger than my usuals but this time the whole movie was based on my character and I couldn't believe my agent — or even the cast selectors of the movie — had not thought of giving me a single call.

Instead, I heard it from the mouth of Tom Hiddleston, the guy I never thought could say something real. Wait, he does have a tendency for lying... But then, why would he bother lying to me? 

The worst was my reaction to that, kissing that man in his cheeks? Where was I with my mind? I probably reached nirvana or something.

Wait for a second... if he knew, he was gonna be a big important part of that movie, and if it's that so, which character could he be?

I started forcing myself to remember the movie's characters, and there was a lot that would have big appearances since in a Casino there are generally big personalities.

There was Vanessa's—my persona— best friend, and he showed a lot since he was trying to take her out of this gambling world.

There was also another character, very important to the plot — at least that was what I heard since I couldn't get the full script to the casting — and he was also a British man.

Oh, God.

The most important male role in the movie was the love interest of my character. And Tom Hiddleston was possibly gonna play him.

Pt.2 here

[lunebinnie]

(1/11)Oh my gosh yesss I'm glad that you like long messages too because I talk way too much 😂 (And yeah about my friend and just hanging out w/ her more that's exactly what I was thinking 😂) It's actually kind of funny bc just yesterday I was hanging out at her house and her younger brother needed to go to Walmart and I was like 'I've been meaning to go to Walmart, I'll take you' and ofc since I have a bluetooth radio adapter the whole drive I had my Spotify going with some quality k-bops, lol

2)And as we were driving I noticed him kind of jamming and I was like 'Oh my god Mickey do you actually like this???' And he was Like 'yeah, these are some good bops 👍' I was shooketh. I had to go home before I had the chance to show him any music videos but he says he's open to watching some with me next time I see him. One way or another I'm going to turn someone in my social circle into a kpop fan you mark my words ☝ and then maybe we can team up and try to work on his sister some more 😂

3)I only started first getting into kpop last June so I'm still very new, but it's definitely super frustrating how so many ppl act like it's an inherently bad or cringey genre of music just bc it's kpop! The stigma is ridiculous! I also started out with BTS (lol) and since they're pretty popular in the US at least I was able to be like 'See, this isn't just a niche thing, lots of people know abt and like this group' but of course my dad still says 'Just cause it's popular doesn't make it good'

4)And I'm like? You're a band teacher, you of all people should understand that music doesn't have to be in your native language (or even have lyrics) in order for you to enjoy it, but go off I guess... It's the same with one of my college friends. They make fun of me for liking kpop but this is coming from some who still treats March 22nd (the day My Chemical Romance broke up) as a day of mourning. Like, no tea no shade no pink lemonade, MCR was a good band nothing wrong with liking them.

5)But like if you're 22 and you still haven't grown out of your emo phase do you really have room to pick on other people for their music taste?  🤷 Anyway that's the person who follows my main that I didn't want to know I had a kpop sb. I think I made it around July. Tbh it was pretty dead for most of 2018. But like I said I've started using it way more since I recently revealed that it exists, lol. Especially since that good good Astro cb 👏💗😩 But honestly Astro is such a blessing

6)Idk how I lived so long w/o them. When I first got into kpop I was planning on just sticking to BTS since the reaction to me being into kpop was so volatile. I was like 'I'm only into one group, ppl already are negative about me liking kpop so I'm just gonna stick to this and not become a full on multifandom fan' and then in Nov I accidentally let myself fall in love with Monsta X and that plan was foiled. And realizing I wasn't gonna be able to stick to just one anymore opened the floodgates

7)And I was like okay in that case, let's just start getting into *all groups* Lol. My story of getting into Astro was actually bc of my best friend's roommate (can you tell I have like one friend and my whole social circle kinda revolves around her? Lol) so this roommate when she heard me being sad about having no kpop friends was like 'oh hey, I'm kinda into kpop' and it turns out she didn't like very many groups and was one of the ppl who blah blah BTS is overrated, which ya know isn't ideal8)But I was just really desperate to have someone to talk about kpop with. And Astro was her favorite so I was like, okay I'll get into them so that I have something to talk about with her! So I started watching some videos and I fell in love with them pretty much instantly! And I was real excited bc #1 now I can talk about kpop with someone! And #2 this group is actually amazing? Bonus! ... And then they got in a big fight about their living conditions and the roommate ended up moving out RIP

9)So that didn't work out, lol (Your story about finding them during that internship sounds amazing though! Haha) But yeah, so this is my first cb too! And although I love them w/ my whole heart and would have loved to have them in my life even sooner what an amazing cb to be your first! The concept was wonderful, the album was excellent, the visuals were to *die* for. They worked so hard and I'm so proud of them and I'm so happy we got to see their work come to fruition and get them a win 🤧🤧

10)The dance practices though? You're so right omg 💗 Me and my Rocky bias *fully* understand 😂 All of them are such good dancers?? I never fail to be impressed. Of course you know who I always end up watching tho 👀 lol (̶i̶f̶ ̶I̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶h̶a̶l̶f̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶p̶r̶e̶t̶t̶y̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶R̶o̶c̶k̶y̶'̶s̶ ̶f̶o̶o̶t̶w̶o̶r̶k̶ ̶I̶ ̶w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶a̶l̶m̶o̶s̶t̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶p̶r̶e̶t̶t̶y̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶e̶y̶e̶s̶.̶.̶.̶)̶ ̶ I also love how at the end they always pause all dramatic for a minute and then start screaming 😂

11)It's like? Amazing talent *and* dorky personalities? What more could you ask for? Lol. In regard to your last question though Unfortunately I also won't be able to see them 😔 I live in the smack middle of the US and since they're only going to coasts all of the venues are way too far away to get to. Esp since it's the school year and I can't skip class to drive cross country for a concert much as I'd like to (Holy lord I talked over twice as much?? Why am I like this?) Talk again soon! -ASA

Okay SO I’m very sorry I haven’t had the time to answer everything until now bc I’ve been busy studying for midterms and also I was a lil trashy today since my uni closed bc of freezing rain so I slept in but I’m glad that FINALLY everything got sent like damn tumblr you really don’t want us making friends huh. 

Yessssss I love the feeling of seeing someone else also get into the same interests! I’ve been pretty lucky in the sense that I grew up around mostly other asian americans, so kpop was never something that was considered super “weird,” like some people were into it and some weren’t but even if you weren’t you still would’ve been familiar with the more popular groups from when you were younger. Even now, I have a bunch of friends also into kpop (one of them is even my roommate) so tbh I was definitely the one in my friend group late to the party aha. Even my university hosts kpop nights at our bar and I’m pretty sure we have a kpop dance team as well? So tbh if I met someone new there’s probably like a 50% chance they’re into kpop or at least listen casually. 

Tbh I used to be a little bit judgy too but moreso because of the obscene amount of money I’ve seen some of my friends spend (no joke one of my friends has spent probably like $500+ on Loona stuff in the past month and a half and another friend bought like 5 copies of the same album for herself like damn idk how do you have that much money).

I also really don’t like it when people bash other people’s music tastes, since I feel like it’s something so personal? Idk but for a long time I used to be really self conscious about sharing my music with other people and even now I feel like that sometimes. For me after getting into BTS I kind of expected to get really into other groups since I was in Korea anyway and I was already listening to a lot of other artists casually. For me it started with NU’EST (fell for them immediately at the same concert that I saw Astro at) and then after was Astro, and then I just started slowly getting into other groups after that (even though I haven’t totally been able to get into Got7′s music they’re SO funny and I just kinda fell for their personalities  you know). 

I honestly think that they did such a wonderful job with this comeback too! I like seeing their concept evolve and mature but they’re not straying too far from their original cute concept so I feel like it’s a nice middle ground that’s very unique to them, you feel? Also I feel like the visuals especially and the execution of the whole plant concept was just done so well?? Even my friend who’s not in kpop was like “k idk who they are but that was the prettiest music video I’ve ever seen”. What are your favourite eras and songs? For me I’d have to say either the Spring Up or Baby era BUT right now my favourite song is probably Again/Should’ve Held On though tbh my mood and my tastes change like every few weeks loool. 

I have no idea why I tend to be most attracted to the dances rather than vocals or rap (maybe has to do with the fact that it’s something I’ve always wished I could do but have always been bad at lmao). But Astro’s stood out to me for the exact same reason! I just thought it was so funny seeing them all break character at the end because you really get to see how hard their choreos are and you get a glimpse of their personalities like damn, how can you not stan these dummies?

That’s really unfortunate that you won’t get to see them either :/ They’re also coming to the closest city to me but it’s on a Tuesday, but I *hypothetically* looked up flight prices and tried to see if I could get away with just missing a day of classes if I flew back in the middle of the night since I have some friends who did the same thing and drove down to Buffalo but I seem to have underestimated the size of New York State LMAO. But apparently my university’s too far from the airport so it’s “not realistic” (and also I’m hella broke from travelling to Taiwan and Japan while I was in Korea but that’s a minor issue ig). I hope we do both get a chance to see them live though! Who knows, after the success of this comeback I’m expecting a lot more cbs and world tours out of them ;)

[i-might-be-a-kpop-fan]

KPOP SONGS! Part 2/?

So I thought I’d make a list of the songs in my „kpop“ playlist and write a little about them because I’m bored. These are supposed to be chronological, but after looking at the list I’m not so sure about it also because I love to buy music in bulks. 

PT.1

THESE ARE JUST MY OPINIONS/EXPERIENCES TAKE IT WITH A PINCH OF SALT AND DON’T KILL ME! 

Also write me if you wanna chat about it :D 

ZUTTER - GD & T.O.P:

 This song is a little scary tbh, apart from the badass vibes

I always loved T.O.P’s deep ass voice and with GD’s high pitched rap it’s just perfect

The MV is funny, creepy and a bit fucked up but what did we expect honestly :D

They rhyme aLOT in this song which makes it really interesting to listen to

made me addicted to the GD & T.O.P combination 

…..ZUTTER!

THE BADDEST FEMALE - CL:

 It took me a while to understand that this isn’t a solo version of „I’m the best“

It’s the queen saying she’s a bad bitch so you know it’s a banger

As almost all CL songs this is good to let off steam and regain your badass level after someone pissed you off

The MV is a sexual awakening on it’s own and performances of that song are also definitely worth a watch

„Not bad meaning bad, but bad meaning good you know?“

Perfect to practice bitch drops and feel yourself to

Burning Up (Fire) - BTS:

 So I don’t really listen a lot to it but I still like it

Has all kinds of badass vibes and I like the soft breaks in-between

RM’s part is by far my favourite his deep voice is so satisfying

The MV is also really cool

You can see from previous songs I had a badass song phase (I still have this phase, I love badass songs) where I only took badass kpop songs seriously

Growl - EXO: 

Okay, so I sometimes forget about this song haha

A good song that screams SM to be honest which I always thought was not that much the case with other EXO songs

The dance to this is really satisfying to watch and was probably the reason I bought this song

It shows EXO’s excellent vocals, has a nice feel and is easy to listen to 

Quite an early song too

I love that you could potentially dance really hard to this but still is very soft

Instantly recognisable and also a kpop classic I would say

GOOD BOY - GD & Taeyang: 

 Is this a kink? This is a kink right?

An awesome song i have bopped to a million times

I really love the „pretty/good boy“ trope and who is better for that then our bad boys™️ GD and Taeyang?

Their voices sound a bit alike and I sometimes had trouble differencing them….whoops

The dance is so so good and the MV is such an accurate representation of these two freaks

God I just love them and miss them so much

I am the best (JP. Ver) - 2ne1:

Welcome to another round of Aki isn’t capable of differencing Japanese and Korean lol

I must say I prefer this version though, I recently bought the korean version and it’s just not the same I got so used to the english parts lol 

This is also a classic, bow to the queens of badass girl group songs!

The MV made me fall in love with CL and the gang

„It’s 2 in the morning our bodies getting freaky, the beats bumping loud but this boy keeps talking! I can’t really hear him but I think he’s saying he loves me? Put his number on this paper but i throw it like frisbee, huh?“

I C O N I C this song raised me, fed me, dressed me and gave me the kick in the butt I needed.

Oh my god! 

BOOMBAYAH - BLACKPINK:

 Why of course after discovering 2ne1 BP wasn’t far behind

Recently showed this MV to a non kpop friend of mine and she drooled over all of them soooo, you can do that

Loved this song the second it started and love dancing violently to it

I now, btw, also own the whole album but it took me a bit to get into them (I was in girl group denial, don’t be like me show them girls some love!)

OPPA!

Being only four really makes it possible for all of them to shine, the vocals are clean and pretty but raspy enough to fit the concept and Jennie and Lisas raps are perfect as always

The beat is easy as is the whole song, doesn’t get annoying and is just a bop.  

Fantastic Baby - BIGBANG:

Nananananananana wow, fantastic baby!

Well well well if it isn’t history right there

Watch the MV, listen to the song! It’s mandatory to know this I’m sorry I don’t make the rules

Danceable, walkable just all in all go crazy(-able)

Boomshakalaka! 

A bit poppy so maybe not for everyone as it sounds a lot like stuff that is randomly on the radio

A dance song that probably was never intended to be more than that. Typically YG, a bit flatter than Bang Bang Bang

I’m repeating myself but you know I heard it’s also something non kpop people enjoy (Basically show them all of BIGBANG, lol)

Ice cream cake - Red Velvet:

Oh boy! My first Red Velvet song that I have because the refrain was stuck in my head and I wanted to know what it was

There’s way more RV later on but for now I think it was the only song

As I said I was in denial of girl groups that didn’t have a badass concept which was soooo dumb!

I love the song, it’s cute and easy to listen to

I love RV’s kinda cute-creepy concept and with the music box in the background it feeds into my liking very easily

I have moved on from it though after discovering other songs from them so I don’t listen to it as often

„I scream, you scream, gimme that, gimme that ice cream!“

Sherlock (Clue + Note) - SHINee:

I have known this song for years! Back when my best friend was into kpop and told me all about SHINee I looked into it, Youtube gave me this song and I instantly clicked. Didn’t like it clicked away and didn’t touch it for 5 years

Well now I love it and can’t stop dancing when it’s on

„SHINees back….“

The MV is confusing but god they’re all so cute in it! Taemin looks so adorable with long hair!

I have watched the dance practice about 100x times and you should too! (jk)

„Tonight, SHINee’s in da house! So give it up for SHINee!“

And as much as I love SHINee’s vocal squad and they’re great in this, Key and Minho really do it for me in this song

The song lives from the dance and the performance and makes it 10x better

It’s also good for just listening though but not really calm and casual so be prepared to break out into sudden song

„Oh I’m curious, yeah!“ (Is it noticeable that I’m listening to it while I write? probably not.)

Breaking News - SHINee:

 And my struggle with japanese songs continues haha

„Come on break down the walls!“

I really like this song though, especially the refrain it’s so much fun

It’s also really danceable (as I think every SHINee song is, I mean have you seen them dance?)

Partly really dramatic (slay Onew slay), partly badass rapping

I mean it’s SHINee it’s fun bright and has a dance rhythm what more could you possibly want?

Ring Ding Dong - SHINee:

 Yeah, i doubt you don’t know this one

Coincidently the first kpop MV I watched after deciding to dive deeper down the rabbit hole and well would you know it…now we’re here

It’s the one about the broken doorbell! Break it down!

This song and dance is Legendary!

Also a fun song that isn’t to be taken too seriously

The MV is kinda dramatic for this song lol

Good to listen to, has a nice beat and melody

There are these songs that every idol can dance to, this is one of them (In the list of “songs every idol can dance to” you’d find a LOT of SHINee btw)

„Ringdingdongringdindongringdigidingdigiding“

SHAKE THAT BRASS - AMBER (feat. Taeyon):

Amber…oh Amber. I love her really a whole lot and as I saw the MV I just had to have this song!

It’s a super fun and dancey song with (as the title suggests) a brassy sound

Much like Woof Woof I really enjoy this song bc of the MV, 

Amber is rapping and being the goofball she is ;)

BUT! As much as I like that song and think she deserves all the solo stuff she can get I like her new stuff more because it’s more „hers“. I really enjoy her singing as well.

And confession of the month: I don’t like f(x)’s sound so I’m happy she does solo stuff

She’s such an inspiration with her unique style and attitude (sighs in very gay)

 Lucifer - SHINee:

 I LOVE this song! OMG!

The MV is kinda uneventful but the DANCE PRACTICE!

Oh boy! Well first off Lee Taemin is very distracting in it but you have to see the dance to believe it! That’s what they perform with! On a regular basis!

The sound is very electric and theres a quiet electric melody running through the whole of it that kinda sounds like some alarm clocks lol

Edgy™️

You should absolutely watch performances! Jonghyuns high note is not portrayed well in the recorded version, boy has breath forever!

Apart from the vocals slaying absolutely every note the rap parts can’t be discarded by any means

It all just fits so perfectly

Oh and of course for a song of it’s time it’s just a little bit...nonsensical (especially the english parts lol: Loverholic, robotronic. what?)

Hero - MONSTA X:

 I’m thinking of a helicopter landing platform, pulled up shirts and a scared Wonho 

The dance to this song is…well do yourself a favour if you like abs and boys

Apart from the drool worthy performance, the song is super cool! Kinda chill, but still powerful and damn rapline went off!

This song really made them known more and it’s for a good reason

The sound in this is what is „typically“ MX for long time (Till up until Jealousy I’d say)

„I can be your hero, I can be your man!“

Sometimes a bit repetitive but what song isn’t lol?

Also still is in the „we all dress awful and don’t know what to do with our hands“ phase but that passes soon

Lead to many wonderful reality shows that makes it easy for new fans to get to know them better (Their group dynamic never changes they all just mature a bit it’s really nice to see.)

Also yes, Jooheon is kinda scary in this but I swear he a cutie

[comebacknow]

regarding tdc, some things i’d like to remind everyone about:

EDIT: this was supposed to be like 6 bullet points and then i ended up describing basically every little detail of the movie, so there’s that.

1. that elaborate opening plan that brought everyone back - Frypan hopping out of hiding, harriette pointing a gun at the berg pilot’s head, etc. they all did that!

2. “How’s it looking, Newt?” “Don’t rush me.” SNARKY!NEWT !!!! I refuse to let this little line go unnoticed and under the radar. i want everyone to remember it.

3. vince just being an overall badass and risking his life for all these kids!! that jump onto the train car! hell yes!

4. the newtmas hug on top of the train car you all saw it

5. ARIS’ FACE?? He fought back so hard! And even though they’re not a big part of the main story, aris harriett and sonya reuniting was so sweet! i want more stories about them

6. Thomas’ utter distraught at realizing minho isn’t on the train and having to break the news to newt but barely being able to say the words

7. vince’s rallying speech about fighting back

8. thomas sneaking off because he doesn’t want to risk any more lives, but newt and frypan Just Knowing it’s exactly something he would do, so they’re already waiting for him (in the dark and everything. dramatic fools.) and thomas’ complete love for them when he sees fry in the car too (bc lets be honest obvi newt would go with him but him seeing frypan following him into danger was probably so endearing)

9. frypan driving! stuck in the glade for 3 years and our boy knows how to drive a jeep good for him man

10. the return of more snarky!newt “not to be negative, but if i was a crank that’s exactly where i’d go.” a nice reminder of “people. in the mountains. mountain people. that’s your plan.” from tst! (and of course the “alright i got shotgun” and the look between thomas and fry like okay we’re doing this

11. frypan flooring the truck and getting rid of that crank! (and also totaling the jeep but hey man)

12. the fact that frypan’s door wouldn’t open and he kept punching the life out of it until thomas was like “dude go AROUND.”

13. newt just falling out of the door like a mess

14. fry shooting the cranks the whole time they’re running! he’s such a fighter in this movie! i’m glad we got action!fry

15. BRENDA IN THE JEEP WITH THE GUN. BRENDA. 

16. “i think what he means to say is thank you.” - frypan translating thomas’ worry for everyone else

17. newt finding the walls when they look at the last city and jorge’s offhand comment about “they built walls, that seems to be Wicked’s answer for everything” i mean LMAO another great line that better not get overlooked. i mean, come on lol

18. i forgot what exactly frypan said at this moment in response to newt but they had an exchange that i laughed about for like 10 minutes. when i rewatch i’ll fill it in better.

19. the whole Wall scene was honestly magnificent and jorge’s annoyed “GET OUT OF MY WAY” to the crowds as he and thomas make their way to the front? a+

20. newt noticing the “armed guards” and immediately running up to thomas and saying they had to leave now. (which, btw how did i NOT realize that was gally even with the mask on.)

21. everyone getting captured and the contrast of thomas and brenda sitting quietly while jorge literally kicks a guard out of the truck. can you imagine how that ride was going down with them?? lmao and brenda telling him she was there and just the overall love and care jorge has for brenda!

22. gally’s return obvi. “we watched you die.” “you left me to die.” YIKES.

23. newt being able to calm thomas down (WHAT A CONTRAST TO NEWT’S TEMPER LATER. HAHA i hate myself.)

24. Gally saying he deserves it and asking if fry or newt wanna get a shot in too because he knows that everything he did was wrong and he probably lives with that shame and guilt every day and i want to cry

25. rose took my nose i suppose! fun fact: this line was also said by a crank in the scorch trials, though not nearly as clear - it’s very background ish and more violent. can’t remember the exact scene but it may have been when they’re in the abandoned mall and one of the cranks jumps on newt and thomas kicks him off the ledge. i was curious to know if it was supposed to be the same crank, but given the distinction between the two cranks i don’t think it was, but it’s something to consider. anyway - THE EFFECTS! his face was so cranky i loved it.

26. newt lacing up his boot probably to make sure his leg is okay and subtly noticing the pain in his hands and the twitching of them and panicking and trying to conceal it.

27. “gally, take care of them.” AW.

28. in the sewers, snarky!newt returns “ugh, this is gross.” 

29. out in the city and newt and thomas seeing a real city for the first time aw. 

30. the telescope and thomas seeing teresa for the first time and not even saying a word but gally just knowing and responding “i didn’t say you were gonna like it.”

31. the meeting when they get back and brenda saying “wait, isn’t this the same girl who betrayed you? the same dick?” and gally saying “i like her.” brenda and gally have attitudes that give me LIFE. <3

32. newt just sitting quietly off to the side during all of this but you can see the annoyance and rage in his eyes until he finally speaks up “worried your little girlfriend’s gonna get hurt?” etc. and the looks between everyone else around the table as the two of them fight.

33. the rage in newt’s eyes and then the immediate fade of the rage as he realizes what’s going on and he has to leave

34. brenda’s face when newt slams thomas against the wall because DO YOU THINK SHE BRIEFLY REMEMBERS WHEN SHE CRANKED OUT??? even though she really get angry with thomas but i’m sure she had moments before the boys met with her and jorge. not that she knows newt’s a crank yet but i mean?? memory trigger?

35. don’t get me started on the deleted scene.

36. thomas’ face when he sees newt’s wrists and the veins

37. the fact that newt must have written the letter shortly after this scene

38. let’e jump back to the cutaways now with teresa/minho/wicked quickly.. teresa thinking she’s found a cure for the little girl and talking with her and being so happy

39. teresa seeing minho and trying to tell him that something in his blood could save this little girl and could save a ton more people, but minho not having any of it because as far as he’s concerned she’s a traitor and has fcked with them and mostly thomas for so long and that kills him because now he’s separated from his friends and he has no idea if they’re alive or not after that raid

40. teresa learning that the little girl wasn’t cured and she’s back to square one now and really beginning to doubt herself.

41. not sticking up for ava paige here but the scene of her and jansen when she’s telling him that maybe it’s done and maybe there can’t be a cure, maybe it was all for nothing??

42. teresa’s walk through the city to take it in one last time and see the people around her whom she thought she would be able to help and realizing that humanity is dying and she can’t do anything to stop it. 

43. HER FACE WHEN SHE SAW THOMAS.

44. thomas barely even being able to look at her without crying.

45. newt being the one to angrily rip the covering from teresa’s eyes and taking his seat next to thomas.

46. “Don’t look at him. look at me. why’re you looking at him. he can’t help you.”  GALLY. 

47. gally talking to teresa because he knows it will be too hard on thomas, and then threatening to chop her finger off???

47a (had to go back because i just remembered other stuff and i don’t want to renumber everything): teresa seeing how good brenda’s doing and realizing it’s thomas’ blood but thomas telling her he doesn’t believe her anymore and to stop speaking and you know how much that had to hurt for him??

47b. Brenda telling thomas to be careful because he has a bad habit of not being able to leave people when he should (flashback to him not leaving her when she was cranking out and when she ran back in the warehouse when they first met thomas could have gone out the window with everyone else but he stuck around to make sure she was safe and got out too).

47c. jorge and brenda’s goodbye. i’m crying for three years.

47d. teresa trying to grab the knife she used because it had thomas’ blood on it but gally stopping her “nice try” because he prob thought she was gonna try to stab them, but she ended up taking the bandage at least! smart.

48. teresa had to have snuck into wicked for the uniforms and then back out right? how’d that work. only slightly curious.

49. newt (in uniform) walking directly up to thomas and teresa and staring at them briefly and threateningly before he nods his head and they’re like “oh, that must be newt.. okay.”

50. gally finding the mech box and Doing The Gally Thing that he was known for in the fever code!! did everyone forget gally was amazing at tech??? seeing him be able to put his brain to use here made me so happy.

51. newt cranking out on the staircase and teresa suddenly realizing why thomas is such a mess and newt turning away from her when he sees her staring at him because he’s still trying to hide it.

52. running and saving all those kids! (and again, sadly, realizing minho is not there)

53. thomas dragging teresa and telling her he’d better bring him to him right away.

54. newt immediately saying he’s going with them and thomas saying no that he has to stay for the serum but newt looking at him and just saying “minho comes first, remember?” SELFLESS.

55. gally leading the kids out to brenda, but when he realizes thomas never met up with her he tells her to stay and he runs back into Wicked to find him.

56. brenda keeping those kids safe with everything she’s got, even when it does mean leaving without thomas because she knows that if these kids get taken again, she’d never be able to live with herself.

57. back to thomas and friends - the whole elevator scene. priceless, honestly. thomas bumping into jansen? perfect. also gave him away probably, but it’s okay.

58. teresa and thomas’ argument in the hallway where he rips his mask off and immediately newt’s like “what’re you doing????” because if wicked sees thomas they’ll take him and newt can’t have that.

59. dumbass jansen coming and ruining everything. thomas holding a gun to teresa’s head, even though he knows he’d never be able to pull the trigger, but maybe teresa wasn’t actually sure for a moment and thought she might die? newt probably cheering this on a little bit. 

60. teresa playing middle ground again and locking them behind the glass doors, trapping them, but also giving them more time. making sure jansen knows she needs them alive.

61. minho hearing the commotion outside and realizing that he might actually have a chance at escaping and it’s enough to pull him out of his unconscious/messed up state and fight back.

62. thomas and newt fighting and constantly looking out for each other “newt get down!” “tommy get back!” and pushing him back before throwing the bomb. just having each others’ backs in general and newt fighting so hard if only to see minho one last time/save tommy.

63. minho coming and saving them by THROWING THAT GUY THROUGH THE WINDOW.

64. THE REUNION. The biggest hug of life and minho looking at them in amazement and saying “is this real” because for a brief minute he probably thought he was back in the room with wires stuck in him making him see things

65. locking themselves in that room and throwing furniture in front of the door to keep jansen out (throwback to tst!) 

66. jansen looking just totally annoyed leaning on the door while the guy comes in with the saw to open the door

67. “any ideas?” thomas’ awkward “maybe.” 

68. the scene where they throw the tank out the window and the whole shot of it falling in the water was beautiful because it was so quiet too omg

69. the three boys looking out the window like.. here we go. and the silent exchanges/thoughts probably going on in their heads?? thomas like “okay, okay, it’s doable. i have to get these two out of here no matter what.” and minho like “jesus i did not think i’d be doing this” and eyeing newt briefly. and newt just overall “well i’ve done it before” and also “well, if tommy says this is the plan, this is it.” because he’d FOLLOW HIM ANYWHERE, EVEN OUT OF A WINDOW.  -- also, it should be noted that minho doesn’t have shoes in all of this, poor boy running around on broken glass all day. christ.

70. when the saw starts along the door and you see newt’s slo-mo turn. epic.

71. the pep talk!!! “we’re all bloody inspired” !!!!!!!! snarky!newt and book!newt in one! and thomas’ brief look at him like “cut me some slack.”

72. jansen breaking through and the boys just not hesitating at all and going for it and minho yelling thomas’ name when they jump!!

73. jansen almost falling out of the window himself did anyone catch that? and then aiming to shoot and realizing it was futile while also thinking “these fucking kids....” lmao

74. the return of thomas flipping off jansen.

75. jansen saying he wants everyone finding thomas immediately and the other guard saying they were on it and they’ve got eyes already on the bus and jansen stops and is like “what bus?” LIKE... HIS MIND WAS PROBABLY LIKE ARE YOU KIDDING ME WTF ELSE DID THOMAS DO?

76. cut to badass brenda! when she gets stopped and leaves the bus and tells the kids to stay on and then stops and comes back and is like “you’re all doing great.” like!!!! <3

77. FRYPAN COMING TO SAVE THE DAY. That whole scene lifting the bus oh my god. frypan apologizing when he bangs the bus into the side of the wall. the absolute fear in brenda’s eyes when the bus starts breaking and she realizes she might fall. but then frypan running them down as close to the ground as possible so they don’t fall from that height! so great.

78. “out of service”

79. our trio getting out of the water (sidenote - minho is still without shoes and probably bleeding everywhere) and being caught and thomas’ utter “you’ve gotta be kidding me” like i know i didn’t just jump out of that window for nothing.

80. GALLY!

81. minho’s look of complete confusion at gally and thomas saying he’ll explain later but minho is still standing there in complete shock like what is happening.

82. “you guys are nuts.” lmao at gally’s reaction to them jumping out of the window. he must’ve been running around inside and heard one of the guards like “LET’S GO, THEY JUST JUMPED OUT THE WINDOW” and he was like “jesus christ thomas always doing dumb shit”

83. them running for cover behind a small wall and newt coughing like hell and minho suddenly realizing that his best friend is Not Okay. “hey how’re you feeling” “bloody terrible, but it’s good to see you again minho.” TEARS EVERYWHERE.

84. minho being so concerned and asking thomas how long newt had been like that and thomas struggling on how to tell minho and minho probably realizing that even cranking out like he was, newt pushed himself to be there and save minho.

85. ps in the background of this little exchange between minho and thomas, you see newt open his jacket and grab the necklace - possibly making sure it was still there and didn’t come off in the water. :) :) :) :) :) :(

86. “gally i don’t get it, why are you helping us? i put a spear through your chest.” “yeah well, nobody’s perfect.” minho and gally!!!!!!!!! minho was the only one who stood up for gally in the fever code they were friends first and this little exchange just made my heart hurt.

87. thomas and minho (still barefoot???) carrying newt throughout the streets of the city and gally having their back the entire time.

89. teresa finding the cure!

90. brenda and fry getting back and realizing nobody was there and there was probably a big chance that thomas and them might have been captured and all they could do was wait.

91. the crank bombs. the scene of that crank (forgot his name because i’m the worst..) riding into the building with the bombs how epic

92. the explosion and gally’s utter shock of it. “it was just supposed to be the building, not the entire city.” and thomas being like it’s okay let’s just go and gally still just panicking like “oh my god we’re destroying the city, this is not what i wanted, what have i messed up this time” gally just keeps feeling so much guilt for everything and i’m not okay

93. the breakout of the war between everyone in the city and our four boys just constantly struggling to find cover and finally thomas radios brenda and is like “we’re not gonna make it” and brenda is like “we’re not leaving you. i’m not leaving you so forget it.” and NOW WHO CAN’T LEAVE PEOPLE BRENDA I’M CRYING.

94. the boys running to the tunnels and gally turning and saying “we’re almost there newt” and the poor boy saying “just leave me” I MEAN????

95. as they’re crouched low again and thomas realizes that newt is almost fully cranked and they’re not gonna make it and he tells minho - their fastest runner - to get the serum. gally immediately saying he’ll cover him - which i believe 100% he would protect him with his life, if only it meant some sort of release from the guilt of chuck 

96. newt pulling minho in by the collar and telling him thank you. what a LOADED thank you. everything from the maze, being his friend, protecting them in the scorch, giving newt a second change at life. i’m in tears, son.

97. jorge coming with the berg and vince’s return! brenda saying thomas isn’t with them and vince insisting they go get him and everyone’s hype about it.

98. newt completely zoning out and his eyes turning fully now as he actually starts cranking out. thomas’ fear as he tried to bring him back and newt finally does come back to himself and he realizes it’s now or never so he gives thomas the necklace and says THE LINE.

99. “come on newt, it’s me and you. i need you to give me everything you’ve got okay?” “okay.” AND HE FIGHTS AGAIN TO TRY TO MAKE IT. 

100. you start to see newt completely cranking out with his legs dragging and his head twitching back and forth and he’s so far gone at this point and they fall and thomas keeps trying to get him up but newt’s just on the ground at this point with zero strength

101. teresa’s voice over the loudspeaker telling thomas that he is the cure and everyone’s reactions to it - brenda, minho, etc. 

102. thomas turning around to look at newt again but newt’s standing now and when newt turns around thomas loses it because he’s gone

103. THE FIGHT. OH MY GOD. “kill me tommy” and the roars 

104. brenda BOOKING IT

105. newt’s struggle between cranking out and coming back where we see both newt and crank!newt throughout the fight - including when he jump on thomas and breathes out “i’m sorry tommy” before putting the gun to his head.

106. thomas’ look of COMPLETE FEAR when he does this so much so that he just completely smacks the gun out of the way not caring where it landed and crank!newt’s growl at him right before he takes his knife and tries to stab thomas

107. thomas just crying as he tried to keep the knife from going in his chest because he knows they just have to hold off a little longer and the serum will be there, but when the knife actually starts pressing against him he just punches and kicks newt off to the side and it probably killed him to do that but he knew he didn’t have a choice

108. when It Happens and newt’s eyes clear and he just says “tommy” before falling and i’m crying as i write this so i need to skip to the next bullet point before i dwell on this.

109. brenda running to the scene and getting there just a minute too late. feeling guilty because she didn’t run fast enough, she didn’t leave early enough, etc. and seeing newt’s body thinking that could have been her months ago if thomas hadn’t saved her life. 

110. thomas just having no words and just slowly walking away.

111. minho and fry getting to the scene and omg. frypan looking at him and probably thinking back to winston (i’m convinced these two were bffs so) 

112. Minho. Minho seeing his best friend with a knife in his chest. And his knees just buckled because he couldn’t even stand anymore. do you ever wonder how long minho knelt there in silence until fry and brenda had to step in and try to pick him up and bring him back to the berg? because i do.

113. thomas just walking into wicked because he doesn’t care anymore. that was the final straw. he won’t lose anyone else. even if it means sacrificing himself. “just let everyone else go.” 

114. having ava shot right in front of him and barely even registering what just happened. trying to fight jansen but honestly he was probably so weak and tired and mentally shot after everything with newt that he could barely fight. he puts one last effort into it, all of his hatred at everything he’s been put through, but jansen still gets the better of him because he just can’t do it anymore.

115. teresa smashing that vase over jansen’s head and trying to save thomas. she fights so hard! she gets thrown across that table like a ragdoll!

116. jansen and the gun and thomas realizes that he’s going to shoot teresa and thomas runs in front of her to push her aside because despite everything he still cares about her and he knows she was trying to do the right thing. 

117. thomas watching teresa protect him and hold off jansen until he can’t take it anymore and throws the thing. “you missed.” “did i?”

118. jansen getting eaten alive by cranks amirite???

119. teresa and thomas running on top of the building as the city burns around them and they realize that this might actually be it and it’s over. and teresa feeling so, so guilty for everything. “i tried, tom, i tried.” “i know.” 

120. the berg! working to get thomas onto the platform and teresa pushing him up because he has to be saved no matter what, because he’ll save everyone. slipping the cure in his pocket, making sure he takes it with him.

121. thomas’ face when he realizes teresa isn’t going to come aboard, that she’s accepted her fate.

122. teresa’s fall!!!! oh my goodness. what a beautiful shot, cinematically.

123. thomas now lying on the berg practically bleeding to death, his last thoughts probably being about newt and teresa and the last half hour or so he’d just gone through.

124. minho probably seeing that thomas is shot and freaking out because there is no way he is losing both of his best friends today - not when the only reason they’re here is because they came to save him. (also, is minho still barefoot? i hope there were shoes on the berg for this poor boy..)

125. the safe haven! thomas walking out and seeing everyone and him and minho embrace and i just cry every time i think about it.

126. vince’s speech and The Rock for everyone to come make their peace.

127. minho giving the necklace back to thomas, probably not even realizing what it was, what it meant.

128. thomas finding the note and realizing its a letter and immediately folding it and dropping his head because he can’t believe that’s what this was. in his last moments, newt made sure thomas took this with him and thomas had no idea what it even was when he took it, probably thinking “okay sure yeah i’ll hold your necklace, whatever this is i’ve got it” possibly wondering if it was just cranked out newt or if it was actually something important.

129. The. Letter.  Not getting into detail here. You all know it. I can’t talk about it yet. Not yet.

130. Seeing Minho be the one to carve Newt’s name into the stone. I bawled.

131. Thomas carving Teresa’s name into it, because despite everything, she worked hard to save him and get him to where he was, and in the end, she did find the cure. She deserves to be remembered for that.

132. Seeing Sonya Harriet and Aris together again! Group B trio!

133. When they show the stone you see all of the names. Chuck - do you think Gally wrote in chuck’s name as a little release? What about Alby? Maybe Minho? I’m calling it now that Fry wrote Winston’s name.  They still had Ben’s name - I’m saying Minho wrote Ben’s name, because back in the glade they ran together, and he probably still misses him so often.  Rachel’s name is there, probably from Aris. There are so many names, so many stories unheard. But you think about everyone in the safe haven and all of these people they lost and it just hurts. 

134. the last words of the entire trilogy being “goodbye mate. Newt.” and how those words spoke to every single one of us.

feel free to add more bits.

[angelic-guardienne]

I just realized that I, a lifetime resident of Ignis Hell, never made a post on my thoughts on Episode Ignis!! So I’ll do that now I guess while everyone is asleep and not tag anyone because... yeah.

Spoilers galore bc I don’t know if I can write a coherent review w/o spoiling some things. Just a head’s up, this isn’t really the most comprehensive review, it’s more just me rambling a bit, maybe I’ll do a deeper one later but for now it’s just a bit of a ramble. (this got progressively less comprehensive as the post goes on so just... process with caution)

Cut!!

Um where to start... okay, the gameplay. 

I’d actually played with Ignis a bit in the main game before heading to his DLC, meaning I had a brief familiarity with his controls (so I wasn’t panicking like “hoLY SHIT bells and wHISTLes”), I just hadn’t known what the specializations were for, so that was nice. I like the way he controls. He’s very smooth, sometimes he moves a bit too fast for my eyes (looking at that lightning magic) but other than that loved it. Loved him. Wonderful controls. Heard the blizzard power was OP and I concur. I used it a lot, mostly switched between blizzard and fire, was rarely seen hitting that lightning unless it was for a Total Clarity attack, and even then... the fire. the blizzard.

Ignis’ battle cries! Lovely. I don’t understand the “you’re mine!” trend that seems to appear in every game I play, but it sounded great coming from his lips, so yeah, seal of approval. 

I thank the lord every day for Adam Croasdell.

Ignis taking down those huge MT armors with the lance in two blows! (i’m talking before that segment with Ravus... which I’ll address later i’m sure) I’m a big fan of that. If I saw him do that irl i’d literally collapse. I almost collapsed just watching him do it in the game, but i was already sitting so i didn’t. 

(There were many moments during the dlc where i literally collapsed, but let’s get into that later)

But going back to the voice acting. I heard that some people thought it was rather poor but I found it really great? Ignis sounded a little bit whiny at times and completely done with everyone and everything at others and I loved it. He always conveyed the right emotions. 

There were those moments of course (you guys know the one. where he pushes off the MTs in the “resist” timeline. and just. keeps screaming. you know the one) but they just made me laugh a bit instead of driving me away. I look fondly on them.

There were actually a lot of moments that made me laugh in this dlc, serious as it was, i just. must have a very lowkey sadistic part of me. I always laughed at the sad parts of movies as a child. anyways. before i talk about those let’s get into these

these being ravus

ravus ravus ravus. my boy. i loved him before and i love him even more now. i’ve had a ravus/oc in the works for a while now and... and now i have a soulmate au in the works as well. help. this just came to mind. i’m sinking further and further into ravus hell on a daily

won’t even get into ardyn hell

back to ravus

love my boy. wanna hug my boy. i knew he was gonna take luna’s death very poorly but i thought we were gonna get a grief scene and be done with it but we got a grief boss battle (which... was hard. he’s so op like... help. the whole time he was on my team i was so happy i didn’t have to fight him and then...) and not one, but TWO grief heavy scenes so i was beyond satisfied. it was great. 

uhhhh ravy’s beard. 3/10 lol. it’s starting to grow on me though (in a metaphorical sense. i can’t grow a beard.) someone give him a candy cane and put him in red and call him kris

uhhh

(this is getting less and less coherent as we go and i’m sorry)

i’m sorry ravus’ beard is so hilarious. did he grow it because there wasn’t anyone around anymore to tell him not to? whoops made myself sad haha 

Oh! let’s talk about ardyn!

loved all the ardyn content. ardyn made me laugh and curse a lot, mostly laugh because... so theatric. the hat (you know the lil pat pat he gives that MT soldier he puts his hat on) and his little scandalized noises (the gasp he makes when ignis presents the ring in the alt ending) and that fucking scene where he’s revealed to be a grave robber and summons the armiger like it’s snowing outside

which it probably was

beside the point

Ardyn was good in this dlc. thank you Darin de Paul. lovely. his evil laughs... chills down my spine. but he evil laughs in a way that makes me both want to punch him and laugh with him. ardyn ignites emotions in me that i cannot name. not good ones, but ones all the same.

seriously though even if i wasn’t a fan of ardyn, ardyn was great in this. he’s slimy as hell and honestly... wow. he seemed like he was losing him mind a bit in this dlc and i love it. i’m 99% sure it was because of the ring. ardyn’s always a little bit crazier when it comes to the ring and this was allllll about the ring. so kudos for making it a trend

i... have a lot of thoughts about ardyn here. i just can’t express them correctly right now. ask me about them later and maybe i’ll be able to articulate. i’m sick and barely awake and all my brain is giving me is an “ardyn? cool bro” help.

there was more i said i’d come back around and talk about. um.

that mini stealth segment with ravus! wild. literally collapsed and almost missed the quicktime event in the second one. now i wanna replay the episode just to see what happens when i miss the quicktime events. i wanna do that with all of them actually. catch me doing that after i pick up my controller again. missing literally every. quicktime. event.

WAIT CAN WE TALK ABOUT THAT PART WHERE IGNIS FUCKING FLINGS HIS DAGGER INTO THE FACE OF AN MT

BECAUSE THAT WAS HOT AS ALL HELL

HE JUST CASUALLY THREW IT

ALSO IGNIS HOLDING HIS DAGGERS BACKHAND IS MY WEAKNESS

WILL NEVER GET OVER EITHER OF THOSE THINGS

ohhh let’s talk about the parts where i literally collapsed.

1) when the eastern bridge collapsed just as ignis was about to cross it and he looked so done

2) when ravus and ignis did their stealth takedowns

3) when ignis was all “i presume you weren’t born with a prosthetic” like igNIS

4) when ardyn summoned his entire armiger to fire at ignis in the alt end

5) every time ignis screamed in general

6) when ardyn’s sword hit igs in the face and knocked him out

7) “This world means nothing to me. Do with it as you wish.”

8) AND THE LAUGH THAT IGNIS LETS OUT AFTER THAT LINE

9) when i got the bad fucking end because time limits

10) when ravus found lunafreya’s dead body and immediately went into rage mode

11) when ragey ravus attacked ignis

12) when ardyn showed up as gladio

13) obvi. ignis taking down the huge mts

14) while screeching in frustration, whenever ignis fell off of the fucking rooftops

15) oh, when ignis ripped off his earpiece

now let’s talk about the moments that made me laugh bc there were... admittedly quite a few

1) “Don’t be asinine.”

2) the way ardyn fuckin gasped when he saw that ignis had the ring in the alt ending

3) ignis pushing those MTs off of him in the “resist” timeline

4) ignis sprinting?

5) caligo immediately (and... ineffectively) trying to drag Ravy’s edges as soon as the man was out of earshot

6) ignis talking in his little earpiece 

7) “Have you lost your marbles?”

8) “I wouldn’t do that if I were you” Ardyn says a solid number of seconds after Ignis puts on the ring

9) actually all of ardyn’s quote regarding ignis wearing the ring? the man was just like... “wow who is this kid”

10) ravus calling ignis “boy”

11) ardyn just fucking tossing noctis

12) and then tossing ravus as well

13) ignis going full halt next to pryna even though noct is right there, seems even he can’t escape the power of dogs

14) “Let your hair down!”

15) ardyn summoning his entire armiger to attack Ignis with

16) gladiolus “if you’re alive then pick up the damn phone” amicitia

17) the fact that the empire just carries around coeurls for no other reason than to drop down on ignis as cannon fodder

18) ignis sounding (cordially) ticked off with literally every altissian aside from weskham

19) fuckin. watching caligo control his mech in the boat chase

and moments that produced emotions i cannot explain

1) ignis always getting close to the altar/noctis and then getting knocked away by a freak accident

2) iggy getting healed by the crystal’s light (you know the scene. his hair is all down and that’s... the most beautiful i’ve seen him)

3) ardyn going to stab noctis and the dramatic irony bc we know he wouldn’t actually kill him and is just getting a reaction from ignis

4) ravus throwing the dagger at ardyn!!

5) quick recipeh

6) getting fucking. knocked off the edges of buildings. and taking fall damage

7) “I don’t want to die without him”

8) ignis seeing the claw of the fallen mt and immediately thinking “hookshot”

9) one-man army ignis

10) ignis being so very realistically tired after every single battle

11) ignis with his hair all the way down

12) fire eyes

13) fire body

14) generally ignis living up to his name

15) fuckin. father christmas over there

16) ignis asking noctis not to complete the journey and noctis turning it around so quickly jk that actually really really hurt

17) having to watch ignis feel around for everything

18) also i don’t know if anyone else caught this, maybe it’s just my game but i noticed in the ardyn v ignis fight in the alt ending, a lot of the recorded sounds of noct warping/fighting are mixed in the jumble of ardyn and ignis’ fighting sounds. i can’t tell who is making said sounds but i hear them all the time

so yeah

my general view of episode ignis? heartwrenching, 10/10, would recommend, would play again, will play again, all the best things, love it very much, will hold it near and dear to my hear. lovely lovely dlc.

[dear-chaton]

1-100 bb

BAbe lol why it’s fine but oh dear lord who’s ready to another long af ask?

Bc I just answered some of these I will link to the first part here^^

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? More milk than cereal bc I don’t care if it get soggy

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? Lots of cream, milk and sugar.

6: do you keep plants? Nope

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? Writing I guess? I didn’t pick up drawing or painting till late last year

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? Always, singing to myself as I fill this out right now haha

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? Side but curled up nearly in fetal position bc I’m lanky as hell

12: what’s your favorite planet? Mercury?

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? Either really pastel or grungey

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! In space metal sticks together ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? Lasagna

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. I like to point out friends spelling mistakes on discord and pin them so that everyone sees bc I’m slightly dyslexic so it’s funny when I do catch mistakes

20: what’s your favorite eye color? I love green and blue eyes

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. There’s many of those lol

22: are you a morning person? Nope

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? No, I don’t like to have one single person that knows every single little thing about me, I have multiple people that know many things that I trust to them but often those things rarely overlap

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? No where?

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? It’s a tie between my pug shoes or my cat shoes bc they have memory foam soles since I work on my feet all day I wanna have some comfort on my off days

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? Just plain regular bubblegum

28: sunrise or sunset? Sunset

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?  Oh yeah plenty of times

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. It was after a friends party last year and we just sat in her living room comparing the average guys dick size for some reason 😂

33: what’s your fave pastry? Croissants

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? It’s a really big bunny rabbit, I don’t think I ever named it to be fair and yeah I keep it on my bed nearly all the time and it’s something I use to comfort me if I’m sad and wipe away the tears if I cry :’)

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? Yes lol but I more so collect them than use them

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? Either skillet or Pentatonix

38: tell us about your pet peeves! Hate when people cut me off when I’m saying something, I barely talk so when I do I’m a little miffed if I don’t quite get to finish my train of thought, I also hate when people chew loudly in a quiet setting like please no save me

39: what color do you wear the most? A navy blue or a jade green

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? I guess the most important to me is my purity ring and I’ve had that thing since I was 13 so nearly 8 years I’ve been wearing it and yeah

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! It’s kind of quiet and quaint but it’s fabulous to have study groups there and sit there for hours I feel bad for the people that deal with us but it’s so nice

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? Being in the back of my boyfriends car, cuddling him

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? Ha nope

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. What’s the favourite movie for cats to watch? The Sound of Mewsic (you can pry cat puns out of my cold dead hands)

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? Heights and yes still hate it

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? I love cds and the last one I bought I can’t actually remember it’s kind of been a while^^

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? Bears from each state

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? Misbehaving by Pentatonix or The Only Exception by Paramore

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? That despicable me meme bc I love those movies okay

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? My friend Stirling who just had to put his dog down :(

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? Screeched and lunged for my phone I guess erm

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? Just the small things you don’t think of when you think of a particular person like someone will bring a blanket to our group between breaks and we’ll all huddle underneath it or someone will push two couches together so people can cuddle and/or spoon and be cute like stop being so freaking cute sometimes okay,

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? It’s interesting I’ll say that

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? I am bc I’m the oldest of my friends and therefore the only one who’s roughly allowed to drink but no seriously my role on two discord servers is a toss up between Wine Aunt or Wine Goddess like I don’t make this shit up

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? Have never really liked poetry so uh

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? Orange juice

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? On my bookshelf there’s all my favorites out on display but the rest are kind just shoved into boxes

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? It’s dark out bc it’s nearly midnight 

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? My best friend even though I haven’t been the greatest friend and not talked with her in a while >.

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? Soft with white and light blue flowers I guess?

68: what’s winter like where you live? Hot and humid most of the year with a week or two of what the fuck Florida

69: what are your favorite board games? Checkers

70: have you ever used a ouija board? Nope

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? Most definitely

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. Always ready to fight

75: tell us about your pets! I had a puppy that I had to give away over the summer, she wasn’t really a puppy she was a little on the older side but I really loved her and miss her a lot

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? Studying but my classes are pretty easy

77: pink or yellow lemonade? Neither

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I don’t mind them but since my nephew likes them I tolerate them

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? One wall is just a hot pink bc that was the color of my sheets at some point but I’m gonna paint it to a pastel mint hopefully soon

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. Like an iceberg, so cold it pierced my soul (idk either man)

82: are/were you good in school? Pffffffft that’s hilarious

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? I wanna get one tattoo is it’s simply ❝&❞ and on my left inner wrist

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? No not really, haha

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ idk

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? Homeward Bound bc that is my shit okay

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. I don’t like cities so um yeah

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? Er maybe to the city to go to a con but otherwise not planning to travel much

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? Drowns it with cheese, after taking a lactaid pill of course

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? It’s almost always with a headband of sorts

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? My friend Mags

95: what are your plans for this weekend? Going on a date and going boating with my family

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? I always procrastinate them lol my computer must hate me

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? It was 6? Years ago and I didn’t have the right shoes and slipped on some mud and fell

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. I have a YouTube playlist for that shit lol there’s like 100 songs i listen to on repeat

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? Future bc hell if I’m about to relive my past again no thanks fam I’m good

Really Fucking Cute Questions

[softshouyous-archive]

i love u a lot and i've got a v important question: favourite boba flavour??????????? also you're favourite anime/mangas!!!! you're my favourite bean in the world -ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

oh?????? hello anon dear!!!!! 

oh man,,,,, i know i always talk about how i’d die for bubble tea but i’ve only really tried a few flavors HAHAHA but my fave one ever is jasmine milk tea!!! it’s so good ;----; i might get some today or tomorrow with my brother and we’re gonna go to this bakery so we might also get some cake HAHA LFKJGK

mmmmmm ohhhhhh my god okay okay okay!!! this is gonna get long but i’m gonna try to narrow it down to a few!!! (you can find the rest in my about if you want gjflhg)

-haikyuu: i love haikyuu with my entire life?? i don’t remember why i started watching it, but i’m glad i did?? and i’m also surprised i did because my past with volleyball is Not So Fun, and i was scared that it would come up every time i tried to watch, but i’m glad that didn’t happen??? haikyuu is honestly just so wholesome and great??? like the characters are so wonderful??? and lovable??? and the show is just v entertaining but also emotional as hell omg i’ve watched haikyuu like,,, maybe 3-5 times HAHAHA and i’ve managed to cry every rewatch (i’ve found that i cried more with each rewatch actually LOL) and like,,, it’s just so motivational and inspirational?? and like oh god,,, when the other team loses,,, oh no,,,, like i’ve never really watched sports anime before so i WASN’T EXPECTING like the opposing team to be so??? like i thought the opp team would be painted in a bad light but??? when they give them a backstory about how passionate they are and how they try so hard i,,, Die??? and i just feel so conflicted at the end like,,, why can’t,,, everyone,,,, win,,,, pls,,,but also,,, furudate,,,, thank you???? please don’t kill the third years though, let me die instead

-hunter x hunter: oh MAN now i have MOONSHINE to thank??? holy heck??? oh my god??? apparently my friend recommended this to me in hs but i was a fool??? if you ask me what the plot of this show is um???? a young boy goes on a journey to find his dad, but he ends up realizing that his true dads are the ones he met on the way? (this was from a text post i wish i made that up myself) it’s a bit long, like 148 episodes, but it’s so good!!!!!!!!!! like the charas are all v interesting, even if they’re side/minor charas??? love you togashi?? i hope your back gets better?? and the main charas are my CHILDREN and i JUST LOVE THIS SHOW A LOT i wish i could’ve given you more info but if you ever think about watching it just. pls trust me (i’ve rewatched this anime 5-6 times as well ghfkjsldghfjdkhgdjkf) 

-akatsuki no yona: this is shoujo manga/anime but i don’t know the shoujo parts make me laugh gkfjglkfghs listen,,,, i love this anime so much,,,,, i even read the manga after the anime ended because i was just like no??? it can’t end like this??? so basically the anime is about a young princess and she’s been super sheltered all her life (oh yeah she lives in a castle by the way!!) but then (uh idk if this is a spoiler?? okay i’ll keep it Vague) something Happens and her and her childhood friend (who is a DORK i love he) have to leave!!! oh no!! my kids!! but then they go on a journey to find ~the four dragons~ and i forgot why but there was a purpose and they sound Majestic and Cool bc ‘four dragons’ but. they’re also dorks??? they’re so funny this manga is so funny and in the manga manga you see LOTS and LOTS of character development in the heroine and gOD IT’S REALLY GOOD!!!! (there’s also like. mm. 10 percent crying in the somewhat beginning bc my baby gjhfgjf) 

-gekkan shoujo nozaki kun: I LOVE GEKKAN SHOUJO NOZAKKI KUN SO MUCH???????? i watched this a year ago but it turns out that i tried to watch it a few years before but?? i dropped it after the first episode because?? i was??? a fool???? i even remem the site i watched it on?? (spoilers: it was crunchyroll, thank u for being crunchy) god,,, this anime,,, i’m watching it for the third time right now and omg,,, it’s a shoujo anime too i think, and it’s soooooo funny gkjfdhlgj like there are points where there are romantic hints (idk what to call them, i’m not a vocabulary expert) and you would think like omg romance!!!! but then it takes a completely diff turn it’s so funny like IT DOESNT MAKE SENSE RIGHT NOW BUT WHEN YOU WATCH IT GFKLSJGFSK ANYWAY the charas are so funny oh my god,,,, like this anime is just so funny like they manage to make the smallest things so dramatic and that’s like my favorite thing lfjghfj and the charas are also super super lovable like you can’t not love them why are there only like twelve episodes ghdfksghjs 

-boku no hero academia: why don’t i just thank moonshine for my entire life??? bc she suggested this to me?? like i’d seen it everywhere but like??? i procrastinated on it for a few months bc for some strange reason i get scared before i watch new things??? jfkdshglfsgjfk it’s SO GOOD holy HECK??? damn,,,, dude,,, omg,,,, i,,,, okay kjgfhdkjgfh so like,,, same thing, the charas are super lovable HAHA I KNOW I’VE SAID THAT A LOT BUT IT’S TRUE!!! and they have this thing called quirks where they’re p much special abilities that most people are born with!!!! and the story is really interesting and it may sound like the typical shonen anime i guess but!!!!! it’s really really good like there’s also wholesomeness and support in this anime like gjkfshlgj and great character development and it just kind of makes you cry for your children fdjggfksg like i finished this in a week in the summer by staying up until 3 am HAHAHA

AHHH this got so long LKFGJLDKJ i wish i could have given you better summaries but i’m actually really bad at them hjkghfjgksh if you ever watch them though, please feel free to come talk/cry to me about them!!!!

[turquoiseorange]

11 Questions

RULES:

1. Always post the rules 2. Answer the questions given by the person who tagged you 3. Write 11 questions of your own 4. Tag 11 people

I was tagged by @secretlysora !! I love answering questions but I don’t get them very often. So this is a nice change haha, thank you (〃ω〃)

Brianna’s Questions:

1. How many hours of sleep do you get each night? Depends on the time of year haha. When I’m in school I think the average is about 5-6 hours, and on breaks I try to sleep in so maybe 6-8 hours then? I go to bed late and wake up relatively early (either because of school, or my mom wakes me up) so I don’t get a lot of sleep tbh

2. What’s your favorite time of day, and why? I think nighttime would be my favorite time of day because that’s when I “go to bed”. I use air quotes because I really just stay up and play games or read stuff on the internet. It’s pretty nice because the house is super quiet, and I get to do whatever as long as my phone has enough battery haha

3. What are three things you’ve always wanted to do? frig that’s a tough one uhhhh 1) I’ve always wanted to have one of those quintessential college moments with the local coffee house/ slam poetry place. The one example that comes to mind is like in the Xtremely Goofy Movie when they just go to the coffee house , and it’s like a really cool place near campus where they can chill and hang out y'know 2) I’ve wanted to try out ice skating tbh. I used to have quite a few friends growing up that we’re either really good at it, or at least visited the rink a lot, and that got me interested. There were even a couple opportunities for me to go through school, but the timing didn’t work out so I couldn’t go. Less people I know go, now that we’re older, but it still seems like an interesting thing to try out 3) ??? Idk lol

4. What was your favorite memory from last year? I really liked getting to tour colleges with my dad last year. One of the trips we went to Arizona and Chicago (cause I got accepted to ASU and DePaul), and as part of the trip we would check out what the area has to offer. Y'know, to make sure it’d be a nice place to live while I’m staying at college. Chicago was my favorite place, aesthetically speaking. I took so many pictures when we were there.. Plus we got to check out the museums, which is always fun. We walked down from our hotel to the planetarium (because I friggen LOVE space), grabbed a Chicago dog for lunch, then after went to the Natural History museum. Personally the area is a little too densely populated for my taste, but from the few days we spent over there, it was really nice.

5. If you could be any age for a week, what age would you choose to be? I’m pretty happy with my age rn tbh (18). I am considered to be an adult by the law, so I can do stuff like get tattoos or lotto tickets if I wanted, but at the same time I don’t have all the responsibilities of an adult yet because I’m still kinda on the young side.

6. What is a habit you’re proudest of breaking, or one you want to break? One I’m proud of breaking is how much I used to rely on the people around me. Of course when times are bad I ask for help, but in general I think I’m becoming more comfortable in myself? One habit I want to break is biting my nails. I’ve tried to break it a few times since I was a kid, but usually something stressful comes up and I end up biting them again. I guess in order to do that I’ll have to manage my stress first? ha..

7. When you were really little, what did you want to be when you grew up? The two things I wanted to be when I was a kid was either a veterinarian or a singer. I remember when I was in elementary they had us do a project where we wrote letters to people who had the professions we wanted, and ask them for advice if we had the chance to do that job later. For the vet I wrote to a local clinic, and for the singer I wrote to Billy Joel because Green Day was one of my favorite bands of the time. As I got older though, I realized I’m slightly better than average at singing, and I don’t have the heart to be a vet (I get really upset when animals are injured). So instead I’m working towards being an animator haha…

8. What do you love the most about yourself? (tbh this is another hard one for me to answer? ha) uh I like how neat my handwriting is. Since middle school I’ve written a lot of stories on the side, personal ideas and whatnot. My methods of writing meant I would physically write my ideas out, type them and print, then write over with edits and more details, type them and print, and repeat until I either was satisfied with that copy or I got bored with it. So since I wrote so much in those scenarios, my handwriting got better and better over time. I’ve gotten a lot of compliments since high school about how neat it looks, as if it were printed, and that’s pretty cool.

9. What are you looking forward to this year? I’m looking forward to taking Astronomy in my next semester of college ♪( ´▽｀) and more art classes so I can practice more haha

10. What are your favorite hobbies? I love writing and drawing. I don’t draw as much as I should, but once I get back from my trip (in two weeks?) then I’ll make a regimine again. Maybe do a color pallet spam again heh. As for writing, I have a bunch of personal stories I’ve been meaning to work on, but didn’t have the attention span because I was focusing on studies (totally worth bc last semester I got a 4.0 woohoooo). But like with drawing, I want to come up with a schedule so I can make some progress on my stories. (Or maybe.. I could even finish one)

11. What’s something you can’t live without? Social contact hhhhh. I know usually the go-to for people is electronics, like the phone or the computer, but I’ve had both of those taken away and it’s not that big of a deal. What is a big deal for me though is not being able to talk to people. Even if it’s just saying ‘hi’ to each other, and that’s it, all day that’s cool. But not having the option even to do that kills me. Similar situation with physical contact.. Usually it only happens when I talk with specific people though. Like if I lost contact with both neko-chan and my bf at the same time I’d probably die right then and there

My Questions:

1. What is your ideal future?

2. What is one goal you want to accomplish within the next year?

3. What fictional character do you think resembles you the most, and why?

4. What type of music do you like to listen to in order to make you feel better?

5. What was your favorite T.V show when you were growing up?

6. What was your first introduction to social media? How long ago was that?

7. If you could have any animal in the world as your pet, what would it be and why?

8. What is the most important thing to you right now?

9. Is there someone or something that has dramatically changed your life?

10. What is your favorite time of the year, and why?

11. What is your favorite type of drink, and what is the ideal scenario you’d have it in?

I don’t have 11 people to tag ʅ（◞‿◟）ʃ so I’m gonna just tag @crookedlovestory @bbpoltergiest @peanutbutter-jellysquid (If you guys are interested in answering the questions, go ahead. If not, I’ll just say hi and hope you have a good day lol)

[unrrrreliable]

08.06.2021

so much stuff happened

i dont even know where to start lol. actually ive wanted to come on here a few times but i didnt know the password but oh well.

so to summarize all the stuff thats been happening/has happened this past 8 months: 1- school, no friends (in my class), same shit. 2- my dad got drunk on february 5th and got stuck in the fucking park at like 23.00 and my brother and i had to call security to open the gate and then we also had to call the police and the ambulance because he was too drunk and aggressive. and 3- i had this fucking piano competition on march 21st, got the 1 prize which was reaaallly wide as in a lot of people, even those who didnt really deserve it, got it. basically it was really fucking stressfull since i was practicing the wrong way, didnt make huge progress, wanted to stop and cried a lot. but hey its been a month (the 2nd and last part was on may 8th and it went pretty bad because i got like 5th prize. i know i competed against ppl who are in university but i still couldve done better and anyone who comforted me knows that. i also went to the therapist a few times. is it helping? well i cant say that it isnt, but yk. at least its someone i can talk to. 

right now i still have to practice for my piano exam which will be on june 24th. its going fine ig, although i didnt study properly for like a month. thank fuck tests are done bc i seriously couldnt do any more of that shit istg. 

to be fair whats worst in this precise moment is my school situation,. not academic, but social. so as you know, i havent reallyyy tried to be part of the boy group in my class, as in i dont really talk to them, mostly because i just have no idea of what to say to start a conversation so it gets really akward. but today my mom came into my room asking me if there was a cena di classe today and ofc i said no bc no one had invited me. but then i remembered that yesterday a few ppl were organizing something for today. i think it wasnt only the 4 guys but there also were some girls but im not sure. either was, not trying to be dramatic but that kinda hurt lol. like i know i dont talk a lot in class but what would it cost you to invite me. but whatever. i also cried 30 min ago. it felt good afterwards tbh. but i still kinda feel like shit. its just the fact that this whole school year ive been really fucking lonely. not 0 friend lonely, but generally in class i would be kind of a loner. like i only talked to the two girls who sit behind me and who of course have their own friend group, which they have had since middle scjhool. my middle school friend group basically dismantled since two of theme are in one class and therefeore formed their own group, two others went to another school and another one, which is basically the only one i talk to daily, is in a different school. and honestly we dont go out that much anymore because i stopped writing. i realized that i was the only one who would ever call them so i felt that i was being kinda clingy or maybe i just didnt get the message. anyways, i know that i couldve tried harder and actually get in the group but idk, i just didnt care. obviously it sucked to be alone and i knew why i was and what i had to do in order not to be it anymore, but idk why i just didnt try enough. so yeah this school year sucked ass. at least im changing classes next year. 

one of the reasons why i didnt really bond w them is that were just different people who have different tastes and interests. they talk a lot about video games and football, which i have no understanding of. generally every interaction i have with them is really akward. but still i feel like and know that i couldve tried harder. what sucked is that all my friends are in other classses and formed their own friend groups and are just moving on yk? it kinda tore apart the friend group but im happy for them. meanwhile i was stuck in that class. not many friends tbh, never went out and still never go out. wow nice im crying again. 

tbh what really sucked was going home at lunch or after school alone and seeing wveryone with their own friend groups. and yes again, i know that i could have waited for them or just tried to conversate with them, but whenever i waited for them or tried to catch up they just walked faster (not on purpose) but it was impossible to even squeeze myself in so i was just like whatever. also what really sucks is that they (plus another guy who literally is always hanging out with his girlfriend) are the only guys in my class. and i cant only hang out with girls cause yk.

i also miserably attempted to form a group which consisted of me g g v and v. it failed because g and g started getting all bitchy and viscious and i was like ok then fuck off. plus theyre always w their boy/girlfriend, and v is always w g. and i literaly have never even had a conversation with v. 

but im so glad m exists. shes one of my best friends. i really like being around her, talking to her, i like the way she just lives life and is up to anything. also she’s always there. i just love her so much. not in a romantic way though. i also really like f but she hangs out with her boyfriend every satuday, which was the day we used to hang out. i still love talking to her and being with her. those are basically roughly the only two people i hang out with. like i cant really think of anyone else except for my old middle school friend group with which the last time we all hung up was in march. 3 months ago. i hung out w a, in the middle of april i think. but that was it. so of course we dont hang out regularly. also, i havent gone out for the entirety of may, which again i know is my fault, like i couldve asked anyone in my class. the boys dont really go out tho, bc i know e only hangs out w his out-of-our-class friends. and tbh i feel like if the 4 of them went out he would invite me (questionable?). but idk. but again, i really like hanging out w her, acc we went to milan on friday. it was really nice. we both enjoyed it a lot. theres still something i wanna say about her but my mom is calling me so i have to wipe out my tears haha

see ya

[speaknowslut13]

Lauren my beloved! Sorry I missed yesterday, my life is chaos and also I was out of data haha.

Ohh very fun! I feel like kids that age are fun because their personalities are really starting to develop.

Awesome! I’ve also played flute since 5th grade and then I played piccolo in marching band all through college. I miss playing in groups, and I’m really hoping that’ll be possible again soon! You are to drums as I am to singing lmfao I was almost kicked out of choir in high school bc I canNOT carry a tune. What other instruments do you want to learn?

I love channels like that! That and cooking channels are the majority of my subscribed to haha so if you ever decide to start a YouTube, I will certainly be on your subscribers list. Understandable, Tiktok stresses me outtttt lol I go on from time to time bc my sister always sends me a bunch but then I have to delete the app again.

Awwwwwe oh my gosh, that’s so cute!! 🥺🥺 what was your wedding like? (Though I never plan on getting married myself, I loveeeeee weddings hehe) what kind of stuff do you like to do together?

Omggg what an incredible experience for rep tour! Tumblr during rep tour was one of my favorite times ever on tumblr, like so exciting to get clips of the b stage songs and see peoples posts about meeting her! What other concerts have you been too?

I’m hoping to visit Croatia at the end of august, if everything goes according to plan/covid doesn’t once again wreck my plans. I grew up in the northwestern US, and there people joke that the seasons are “fire season, road construction, winter” and winters are regularly so much snow, windy, and -20°, so not ideal conditions for enjoying them. Have you been to Grand Canyon or any of the other national parks in the southwest? They all look so beautiful, that’s one part of the US I would definitely like to see more of.

Thank you!! I’m really excited to be a student again but I am also really glad I took some time off. I enjoy Dostoevsky! Probably not my all time favorite, but my best friend loves him so I’ve read a lot of his stuff and talk about it a lot. Also a big fan of Byron and I have a love/hate relationship with Shakespeare. My favorite poet is ee cummings, I love Cynthia Kadohata, huge Neil Gaiman fan. And many many others haha but off the top of my head let’s go with that 😅

What do you write about? And in what medium? I write a lot of poetry and I like writing non fiction, but I learned in college that I am NOT a fiction writer hahaha.

What have you been up to this weekend?? I hope you’ve had a lovely day 💖 Drew

ps: I love reading your responses! Please don’t feel bad or stressed about writing a lot ✨✨

Hello, Drew! Chaos feels like the natural order of the world lately. It’s fine if you miss a day or two! I understand.

I actually never really wanted to be married myself. I figured if I did, I’d be at least 30. I wanted to get school done first. Then, after my previous relationship, I decided I wanted to be alone. Fate had different plans. I also wasn’t sure I wanted kids. Changed my mind. However one is plenty. One of my biggest pet peeves is when someone invalidates a person’s choices by saying “oh you’ll change your mind”. So even though I changed mine, I won’t be implying or outright denying that you don’t know your own mind.

My wedding was small. We eloped. It was a complicated situation with his family at the time, and we had decided to have the protection of a legal document since we were living together anyway. We picked randomly picked the day. Turned out to be Valentine’s Day. So, I, along with millions of other people, got married at a court house. In fact, someone was wearing my same dress that day! It was awkward. We have yet to have any celebration outside of that day. It was just my immediate family. However, I’ve never regretted marrying him and I still look back fondly on it. Fun fact: his parents found out we were married after we totaled their truck a few months later. Not so fun fact: that was the scariest accident I’ve been in to date. Accident wasn’t our fault and at least in this accident I had airbags. Ever been in an accident? Or in one without modern crash technology? It’s not very fun. Hurts a lot. I remember having to tell my father in law, on the side of the road, that Chase and I had actually gotten married. He was stunned but super supportive. Like I previously said, it was complicated . And I can get into it more, but there’s so much else to address right now!

We really like sitting in silence on our phones together! 😂 We are one of those annoying couples who like to do everything together. We are practically attached at the hip and the pandemic has only made it worse. He’s really interested in getting into D&D. We like playing video games together. We both love swimming. We both really want to travel. I’d love to take him to Europe. We like movies. But we both compliment our different likes and knowledge. He loves animated movies and animes and I love books. We both love art. He’s so good. He lets me do his makeup and nails from time to time. It doesn’t bother him at all. But not only that he’s really helpful at making sure I get my medicines and that I get rest when I need it. Throughout the lockdown he’d do all the running around so I wouldn’t have to go out since I’m immuno compromised. Sometimes I feel like he’s too good to me and the kid. I try to give back what I can. But honestly, he’s my best friend too.

Ahem. Enough gushing.

Other than some musicals and local symphonies, I’ve never been to any other concerts! Weird. I know! I’ve wanted to but never have. I’ve always wanted to see Imagine Dragons. Or Panic! at the Disco. There’s a few artists actually, I’d love to go see.

Croatia is BEAUTIFUL. My time in Europe was 2 weeks during July. I’m in love with it. If you go, Rijeka is wonderful. But near Rijeka is a mountain town called Fužine. It’s MAGICAL. I spent most of my time there. One of the upsides to staying in Rijeka is that it’s just a few hours away from Venice, too. Which. Was also breathtaking. I cried at the beauty of it. I have pictures of these places and I love looking at them. But they also make me a little sad. For multiple reasons. We had a layover in Munich on our way home and so we spent two days there as well. We drove up to the Neuschwanstein castle. It was amazing. But the most harrowing part of that stop was at the site of Dachau. I will never forget the heaviness of it. I had to stop halfway through. It was too much for my sensitivity. A privilege I will never forget.

I was able to visit Idaho (Rexburg) during October and December one year and I loved it. I’ve only ever been to Washington (coastal) and Oregon during the summer months. I wanted to go to school in Washington, originally. Thought I’d move up there. Now the goal is to ultimately expat. Canada, likely. We will see if that ever pans out, though.

I’ve been to the Grand Canyon once when I was 10 or 11(?). We went during December to ride the “Polar Express”. It’s a special event they run during the winter months before Christmas. We were snowed in so we stayed an extra day and took the train to the Grand Canyon. So I got to see it all snowy and clear. It’s gorgeous and I highly recommend it once. I don’t know if I would ever really go back but I might take the kid someday. I at least want her to go on the Polar Express ride. It’s cute and fun for the kids. I was a little too old to fully enjoy it, but my little sister was roughly the right age.

I’ve been to several places in Arizona. The missions, Jerome, and I’ve also been to some places in Colorado and New Mexico. I can’t recall all their names off the top of my head and it was a long time ago.

I greatly appreciate anyone who can write poetry. It is not my forte. They come out childish and awkward. So, I keep those to myself. I write anything and everything. I have several stories, but three top priority right now. One is complete but needs serious reworking and revision. I started it when I was 15. It’s a paranormal mystery with romance. The second one is a fantasy that I started with a friend when I was 14/15. It has its own world and has taken on a life of its own since then. It’s massive. And the third one is a coming of age story. It’s my most delicate one. I started it when I was 21. I have shared an excerpt on tumblr of this one. It’s my most complicated one yet. Like any artist, I’m constantly second guessing my work and lamenting my talent.

This weekend has been mostly spent recharging. I’ve been helping my mom with a project. And of course swimming. I’m a child at heart and I bought myself a mermaid tail. I’ve elevated my pool game. It’s so much fun but my body is yelling at me. I’m not as energetic as I was in my youth. You mentioned marching band? You and I really do have much in common! Not only are you a flautist, but a marching one at that?! I marched in high for two years. I loved it but I started to get burned out. And then I started horseback riding and planned to do that instead. My parents couldn’t afford to do both. And then I caught mono. Looking back, I understand why my mono knocked me out for so long (it’s linked to my autoimmune issues) but at the time every one of my friends thought I was being dramatic. It was kind of a horrible experience. So even if I had signed up for band my junior year, I would’ve had to quit. And then my senior year I signed up for this program that put me through a college program to get my EMT-B. I didn’t take band at all that year. Now I just play for myself. Ideally I’d learn every instrument.

I actually couldn’t sing very well for the longest time. Which was ironic because my mom was operatically trained. My older sister was also trained. And my little sister preferred chorus to band. I ended up teaching myself later. So now I don’t sound terrible but I’m not going to take my solo act on the road anytime soon.

If I can teach myself makeup, art, instruments, and other various things, then maybe I can also someday be brave enough to put myself out there on the internet. And if I do, I will definitely let you know! I will at least have 3 subscribers. 😂

Tell me about this trip you’re planning to Croatia!

[biaswreckingfics]

Britt! I finally did it! I found the time to read Tbr! And I binge read it in a whole session because it was soooo good!

You are a genius! I honestly didn’t expect myself to be hyped for such relationship angst but damn gurl you got me there!!!

You wrote all these chapters so well! I read all those comments when you first posted the story and I laughed about all the maya haters you made without even knowing what happened..

But now.. I want to join all those people!

Maya is indeed a giant Sssssssssssnake! That’s all I have to say! Point made!

I don’t know why... I honestly have the feeling that I am the only one thinking that baekhyun isn’t an asshole 🙊

I mean yeah he did many things wrong but he did always tell the truth and never cheated.. in some way I can understand his actions. He found a new friend who could understand his love for fashion and many other things and he was so sure that this relationship isn’t in any way romantic that he ignored all the obvious signs of maya. I can understand that he got upset about y/n accusing him of cheating repeatedly. And he knew what he did wrong and opened his eyes right when she broke up (maybe a bit to late but at least he did!) and he apologized. So yeah... I couldn’t get angry at him the whole time because I could imagine myself being a bit like him in this situation (but I wouldn’t neglect my gf/bf that much or at least I hope so) 😅

And then we have y/n being the loyal gf she is and trying not to bother him with her thoughts and just trying to talk to someone and that is her friend sehun and the other boys. I was nearly as shocked as her when baek told her how frustrated he is because all besided with her and “left” him. I got so sad at that moment because until then I didn’t saw it!

And oh my gosh! Miyoung! How did you write all those wise words for her character?!?!? All these advices she gave y/n were so thoughtful!! I was like damn is she an Oracle?! Everything she said was so true!

Last but not least: Mr. Oh Sehun!

Because he is my ultimate bias, reading his behavior was difficult for me. At the beginning I was laughing out loud about his sassy attitude in front of Maya 😂

But then his attitude became toxic and I was like: woah woah woah boy! You are crossing a line here! Stop overreacting!

Then chapter 9 (I think so) came and we got the reason he got so heated up! Jesus for a second I really thought he was in love with y/n!!! But I didn’t ship him with y/n at all so I was happy that there was another reason. When he was apologizing I got all soft and couldn’t be angry at him anymore. And after this I thought about his whole attitude. Of course you dramatized his behavior for the story’s sake but honestly I think he would be a lot like the character you created... he would be the best friend to call you right after tour to hang out and not be angry cause you want to do something with your bf. He would be the one telling you what he saw because his eyes are your eyes and of course he wants to hear all the gossip. He would be the one who maybe gets a lot emotional when the group is discussing and he would be the one being most horrified of baeks actions. He would seriously be the one being terrified because he thinks its his fault that his best friends heart is broken by his brother. 😢 I really think that you included so many of his character traits and for me that’s wonderful! As i said in the story he is portrayed way more extra and of course I don’t know oh sehun in person but what i know as a fan of him and the shows and videos we can see of him, i think there is a lot of reality in your words.

Here I am rambling the most over a side-character 😂🙈 but anyways.. I am sooo curious what the ending will be!!! And I want to thank you for another great series! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

The way you have hit every single nail on the head 👏👏👏 I had fun reading this ask haha

First, thank you 🥺🥺 I'm very glad you're enjoying the angst and the fic haha, and now you can see why everyone hated Maya for yourself!!

You're not the only who thinks Baekhyun isn't being an asshole, bc I also don't think he is 🤭🤭 but I'm biased... literally lol. Maybe it's bc I could relate to his situation a lot in the first place, and my bf would say I'm neglectful of him now probably, so... 🥴🥴

What I wrote for Miyoung is just something that I would've said if someone came to me with that mess of a situation... sometimes it really just helps to get an outside perspective, or a perspective from someone who can see all sides!! I'm glad everyone likes her though 🥺🥺

Thank you for your analysis on Sehun's character!! Whenever I write a story with an idol, I try to keep in mind everything I know about that idol. Things I've seen them do or ways they react to certain situations... they're showing us their characteristics, but it's just that little step further when you're writing. For the most part, I can see the idols doing many things that I've written about them, and I just try to stay true to what I know!!

❤❤❤

[i-hope-youre-hopeful]

Just did a Bad Thing™

And I’m embarrassingly really jazzed about it lol. Okay let’s just start way back at the top. SO. I had no plans for New Year’s Eve and I tried to make plans but I just couldn’t. I finally resigned myself to the fact that I simply would do nothing until John said he and Hailey were going to hang out at Haileys if I wanted to come. I heavily debated and ultimately decided to go. It was a lot of fun! We had snacks and played tons of Cards Against Humanity and drank sparkling grape juice (among other things) and watched My Immortal and listened to dumb Tik Tok music and it was just a really good time. So basically Hailey invited her friend Elle and she was cool I liked her, and Elle invited her friend Chase. Hailey and Elle could NOT stop hyping chase up and talking about how cool he was and even John was like “he’s such a Chad, he’s like Adam burton but even more wholesome.” Which is a high compliment for John lol. Anyway he got there and I didn’t make a big deal out of it even though Elle and Hailey were like he’s here!!!!! When he came downstairs John was like “it’s Chase!” And I was like “oh wow is that THE Chase Lomont?” And anyway we all got introduced and settled in and started playing Cards Against Humanity. I sat next to Chase and literally within a minute of me being there he had let me try his drink and had me smell this sparkling water or whatever that smelled like PineSol so we were like already talking to one another. Anyway he accidentally brushed my knee with his knee while we were both sitting Indian style and was like “oh sorry” and I was like nah ur good but then I kind of just moved my knee closer and we just sat with our knees touching the whole game and after a while he would like tease me a little about cards and stuff and u know just some good #Bants. Later I handed him a card and he was like “omg your hands are so cold!!!” And grabbed my hands and was like “I feel like I need to warm them for you.” So he held my hands a minute and Elle was like “my hands are cold too!” And I grabbed her hand and was like omg our hands are the same temperature! But Hailey felt both our hands and said mine were definitely colder and Chase kept holding them for a minute. He held them again later and was like “seriously you need to stop these are so cold.” And I was like “I’m not doing it on purpose!” And he was like “yeah right, you’re probably doing it on purpose just so I’ll hold your hands.” And I was like “oh shoot what can I say...” and he was like “it’s okay I’m just using it as an excuse anyway.” And I was like UM OK.

I kept trying to make strong eye contact when I talked to him and he wouldn’t look away. He sang something and I did that little “oh yeah?” Thing to tease him like John always does to me. Eventually he lost the game and was like “it’s hard not being funny!” And I put my hand on his thigh and was like “it’s okay, I’m sure you have other qualities.” And he was like “no I don’t! It’s not okay!” And I was like “I’m sure you do. I don’t know what they would be but you must!” And anyway he got all dramatic and lay dead on the floor and I went upstairs to the bathroom and evidently while I was gone he asked the rest of the group if I was single and they were like “yup go for it.” And anyway I got back and I was like okay it’s OVER over now but I sat back in my original spot next to him and Elle put on a comedy thing on tv so I moved Chase’s backpack and sat next to him leaning against a big chair but it kept moving back. Oh also at some point he was lifting a weight and clearly trying to look like it was effortless and he was like telling me to do it which I obviously couldn’t bc I have no upper body strength and he was like “oh come on it’s easy!” And I could SO tell he was showing off and I was like sir.... you’re acting like we’re in third grade but this is still totally working on me. Anyway so when we were leaning against the chair that kept moving back he was like “we should probably just sit in it tbh.” And I was like haha yeah ok :) but I was nervous so instead of sitting down I started cleaning up everyone’s dishes and throwing trash away for Hailey lol. Then I sat back down and just almost got comfy and I really wanted to get comfy so bad bc I thought something could happen but I knew Hailey was exhausted so I told Elle and Chase that we needed to go home so Hailey and John could go to bed. Elle said she was spending the night so I was like “ok well Chase and I need to leave then.” So we left at the same time and John walked us out and closed the door and I told Chase not to slip and die on the driveway bc it was Icy but he said that’s why it’s fun!! So he raced me to the bottom of the driveway by sliding down on the ice and then we did it again and again. Eventually we just started sliding all the way down the road and talking while we were sliding. He said something about someone saying he was cute and I was like “it must be hard being so attractive.” And he was like “I’m not!” And I was like “yeah right.” He told me about his school and his work and his theatre stuff. John came out and told us to shut up and go home so I made for the car. We stopped outside my car and talked for a minute.

I was like “dude I’m getting so cold I’m gonna get in” and he was like oh man yeah sorry I’ll let you go and I was like ..I mean you can come in if you want... and he was like “yeah maybe for just a minute.” And I SO KNEW IT WAS ON. Anyway long story short he told me about all his trauma and I told him all about mine and we held hands the whole time to keep mine warm. I said something about glasses and he pulled out a pair and put them on and was like “see they help me see cute people. Thank you for giving me something to see.” Or something like that anyway we just sat in the dark and talked for a really really long time. Eventually i mentioned that I was left handed and he said “oh I have to show you this meme then!” And he just started showing me all the memes in his saved on IG. I got closer and closer to him to see them better and idk but I’d swear he was pulling the phone closer on purpose so I’d have to get closer to him. I just gently rested my hand on his leg and eventually we were so close our heads were resting on each other. He said something to me about one of the memes and turned to look at me and our faces were about an inch away from each other. Instinctively I wanted to move away to be within the friendly amount of personal space but I knew he was doing this to test and see if it was okay to be that close so I stayed that close and maintained eye contact. He looked back down at his phone until he saw something else to talk about and he turned and looked me in the eye again, our lips were literally within two inches of each other and we just joked about the meme. I looked into his eyes and they were so pretty and blue and framed so nicely by his glasses in the dark with just the dash lights and his phone lighting up his face. I made some comment related to the meme about liking to kill people and hide their bodies and he said “how do you do that?” And I said “you’ll see later.” At this point he laughed and looked back down at his phone until he saw something about the going back in time to kill Hitler moral predicament so he said “should they kill him?” And I said “yes” and we were trying to argue about it but I don’t think either of us could focus very well because we were so close our noses were literally touching while we argued. Eventually, still an inch apart while talking, he said “I guess there’s no good answer. What are we gonna do?” And I said “I don’t know, what *are* we gonna do?” And all at once he just turned his face and closed his eyes and I closed my eyes and our lips met.

It was a longish kiss, probably like 20-30 seconds tbh. I pulled back a little and he pulled away and said “I apologize.” And I was like “no oh gosh it’s okay don’t worry.” And he was like “I literally never do this” and I was like “yeah kind of a first for me too.” Which I knew in his case was a lie because Elle said he makes out with girls and fucks girls ALL the time bc like literally everyone just LOVES him and he can’t say no so like I knew going in what he was like and he told me all about his girl troubles beforehand but anyway. I was like “I should get going” and he opened the door and started to leave and was like “once again I’m so sorry I wasn’t going to do this you were just really pretty and nice and -“ and I was like “no no it’s okay it really doesn’t have to mean anything it was just a kiss” and he was like “are you sure?” And I was like “oh yeah definitely that’s like for the best honestly I mean maybe it was a mistake but I feel like it’s fine” and he got back in the car and looked at me and said “maybe we should try it again just to make sure” and we were already midway to kissing again and I was like “oh yeah probably couldn’t hurt.” So we kissed again and this time it was deeper and he slowly took off his glasses and he sucked on my lips and started using his tongue and even just barely nibbling and it was so good like he knew exactly what to do and I just followed and mimicked him and then he pulled away and was like “we should get going” and I was like “oh definitely yeah let’s go” and he leaned in to kiss my forehead but I thought he was going back in so I went for his lips and he was like “I was just going to kiss your foreheads but I -“ and then our lips were together again and in between kisses I was like “sorry - I guess - that -would’ve been sweeter -“ and he just hummed “mhmm” and we kept making out. I pulled away and he said “okay seriously were done I’m not doing that again I swear!” And he put his glasses back on and got up to leave. And then I told him to go and to drive safe and he said “sure, on one condition” and he leaned in and I said “I mean if you insist” and we made out for like, several straight minutes. I put my hand behind his head and he had one hand cupping my cheek and the other around my back.

Okay I’m almost done but I really have to finish later I’m exhausted :(