I am physically unable to wait till I finish this, so let me throw another WIP
Shoutout to @a-aristippus @madnessandlovesstuff @tales-of-ryloth @snowleopard-from-venus and many others who added tags and words in their reblogs for me to smile at ♥
(pspspspspps I am also absolutely looking to join an Obikin/StarWars discord, fuck knows I need friends to deal with these star-crossed tragic soulmates)
Awkward Motion by Hellhills.mp3
(read as a person talking to themselves)
So tell me why I feel this way
Someday it has to go away
We didn't really like this place
We made a promise we would stay
Been so unbothered by this hate
Now you found comfort in my pain
And you keep staring at your grave
And you keep wishing that was me
Don't give me options, you got none yourself
Don't make me worthless, you got no one else
Don't let go, it's not your fault
You're all alone and no one's gonna change that
Don't let go, it's not my fault
I'm on my own, I would do anything to change that
I forgot your face, yet I still remember to scream your name
It all got erased, nothing but a waste of time, a waste of space
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Why do u draw?
oooooooo [rubs hands together] a fun one that probably isn't that deep but i'm going to take way too seriously!
so the short answer is fun, but i can never just say one sentence and be done with it soooo i elaborated and wrote a whole essay below. sorry not sorry
anyway if you didn't want my origin story no shame in that, it's not gonna be on the quiz, just keep scrolling :P
to cover all my bases let me start from the beginning and work my way forward...
i think pretty much all kids draw at least a little just because they can, but the thing that really inspired me to take art seriously was the great abundance of cat animations on youtube in the early 2010s... warrior cats amvs mostly, but also artists like bani the kitty and splashkittyartist! you can really see these inspirations in my early digital art hehehe (see below by attle b. age 8)
from then until about age 14 art was just... my thing? i did it pretty much everyday, probably couldn't have imagined life without it... i think back then my motivations were more inline with your typical social media artist motivations... get better, be seen, and maybe make a career out of it? never made it that far though because ehhhh life has different plans i guess
i fell into an art slump in the middle of high school for a variety of personal reasons i won't get into, and as such i had to give up my dreams of creating art as a job
as sad as that was in the moment, it forced me to change my outlook on the whole ordeal in a way that i think was ultimately healthier for me.
that brought me to where i am now! since i have no goals beyond keeping at it as a hobby, i do it simply because i enjoy the process, the product, and i feel like it lets me connect with my interests in a way i otherwise couldn't.
it's a fun way to express love for the things i care about, and while i still enjoy honing my skills i don't feel the same pressure to be perfect that i used to which is really freeing!!
so in that sense it's intrinsic motivation that makes me draw what i draw... however, the amount of art i put out and the polish i give it is definitely motivated by the eyes i have on me... while i'd still be drawing the same things if no one was watching, i would not be putting nearly as much effort into it, nor would i be doing it as regularly, so i do thank you guys for keeping me on track there <3
that's it i think? i could get into the philosophy of it, but i'll spare you that... okay thank you for letting me yap!!! ^-^
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oh yeah hey btw car doodles because the creations and consequences au is living in my brain
kinda id? more explanation of thoughts, let me know if y'all want a real image id
fae lyf fae lyf fae lyf I have decided they have wings and their wings were stained black from soot for years after the war (its only after a few years at the castle Tim and Bertie realize oh their wings arent black anymore wait do fae wings change colors oh wait it's because of all the fire and smoke and stuff oh shit)
Marius climbing in the window :) my silly, I love him
head chef and chief interrogator raphaella la cognizi looking absolutely menacing (is she about to cut some tomatoes or some tendons? it's up to you!) (sidenote what if before she came to the castle she was trying to dissect some corpses for better understanding of anatomy so that y'know medical understanding could be better but people weren't fans of her um desecrating the dead so she had to dip out)
I had the idea of kettle ashes being able to express themself via a genie type steam projection? idk thought it would be fun and also easier for any artists out there
fae carmilla fae carmilla fae carmilla I just think she's neat and I think it's funny if she's somehow connected to like everyone's backstory just a tiny bit
carmilla and nastya, I think they must have been pretty close. carmilla didn't want nastya to take the blame for the curse, but nastya knew jonny needed a stable relationship with carmilla more than one with her (as much as either situation sucked)
ivy design? my thoughts are either an advisor or the castle librarian, her little crown thing is enchanted to enhance her memory
lyf and ashes judging you (pre and post curse versions). you cannot tell me they didn't have gossip sessions about everyone in the castle. they absolutely did.
@rocksanddeadflowers @blazeismyname I'm begging y'all to keep coming up with ideas for me to draw because this is the least art block I've had in so so long and I adore this au
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The other half of Star Trek AU! Ochanomizu (ft. mind meld with Tenma)
I thought about putting him in science division but I like the idea of Ochan having a background in communications tbh. I feel like he would be really interested in that.
He grew up hearing about the development of the world's first "positronic brain" - supposedly a piece of technology that would enable humans to create life forms with true Artificial Intelligence. However the research was shelved and left incomplete, leading Ochanomizu to take interest in conducting his own work on the subject. This gets him scouted by Starfleet, with promises of ample resources and a retinue of colleagues with the varied skills offered within the Federation; and while it was never his intention to join Starfleet, he could hardly resist the opportunity.
This eventually lands him leadership of a research initiative whose aim was to continue the research done into the positronic brain, hoping to create the Federation's first truly self-determining AI android. It's three years into his efforts that the outpost gains its first representative of Vulcan's own science institute, though it could be argued he's much less of a "help" than he is an annoyance; Tenma does not make a strong first impression with the human crew he so derides. Though he's proficient as an engineer, it'll certainly take time for the two to warm to each other in any capacity.
Ochanomizu, outside of his primary research, loves Tribbles! He is a licensed caretaker and helps educate people about them. He has a Tribble nursery on the outpost, much to Tenma's chagrin.
Also, even though he's at the rank of captain, he has never sought out his own command. He likes what he has on his little research outpost and doesn't really have the itch for space cowboyisms.
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Alright, I don't want to be a dick (and that's half the reason why I'm not answering this ask properly and censoring the user's name; I don't want to throw them to the wolves over poor wording), but I just have to say this: if you're going to send in an art request to me, please at least do me the basic decency of being polite about it. I am doing them for free and out of my own spare time, so I am under no obligation to make them if I don't want to.
The way this particular request is written feels like the equivalent of a 'please update' on a fic or like I'm some sort of AI art generator you're putting a prompt into, and it absolutely turns me off wanting to make art for you, which I won't be doing for this one. I'm sorry to be pedantic over phrasing, but I have to set some boundaries when it comes to requests, and this is one of them.
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Decided I'll just block people I see tag their art with "not ship art" "don't tag as ship" and the like.
It's not that I care whether it's ship art, or whether the artist intends it platonically or romantically.
It's that it shows a deep, fundamental misunderstanding of how art works. Art is not meant to be interpreted to the exact dictation of the artist. Art is meant to evoke thoughts and feelings *beyond* what the artist intends.
The audience, viewing, completes the experience by supplying interpretations based on their own unique experiences.
If someone doesn't get that, then they're too mentally shallow for me to waste time on their art. Why would I? There's nothing for me in it--I'm not permitted to have my own thoughts or feelings about the art after all.
Viewing art as complete, immutable product that the audience exists only to "consume" without thinking is the mentality that enables the hideous conversion of "artist" to "content creator".
Besides, the artist has admitted they can't clearly communicate ideas or scenes, since they feel the need to clarify something that should be obvious 99.9% of the time.
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