#i miss posting about my faves on tumblr like this... used to be an everyday thing

[wp100]

Choose your Khadgar

[door-insurance]

Revisiting life is strange and its fandom is really bittersweet

I don’t think the fandom is completely dead, it’s not what it used to be and I accept that but it’s bittersweet

also I don’t wanna gatekeep anyone from discovering LiS late, I don’t believe in “true fans”- I’m glad we’re still getting fandom babies hehh, thankfully there is a lot of fan materials to be discovered

I just wanna be a sentimental fool about the life is strange fandom, I was there when the first episode came out I was as old as the characters and it was an event, a moment that can never be replicated- the barbenheimer for tumblr lesbians

We never had a game like this before, it felt tailor made for us and we went crazy

It was fun, you’d just log on tumblr and find new fanart of your favorite character or ship- inside jokes and shitposts were rampant, a couple of fan writers and artists came together and made a fan game- “Love is Strange” where Max gets to romance Chloe, Kate, Victoria, Amber (tell me I’m not the only who remembers shrektoria and Rachel eating a salad while laughing meme)

I made fanart and memes and they blew up but I lost that account

They’d call us sjw trash on YouTube and make fun of the game, we didn’t give a shit

But I think it was around before the storm where i started to lose interest and was burnt out, also I just didn’t like the direction they went with for the game I thought it was an unnecessary edition to the main story (Rachel didn’t need a complicated backstory, Elliot, too much conflict for 3 episodes) and I don’t think I was the only one cause this is where the fan art and fic updates started to slow down

Then I moved on to other things, other fandoms- shit happens.

Life is strange was just another part of my cringey teenage self who the hell cares I was cringe

But now I’m an adult, I have responsibilities and anxieties that I never knew I’d have to deal with- i went through a lot in the last 8 years sometimes I wish I was still that cringey ass teenager. This year was particularly bad, lost someone I loved

I stumbled upon old fan art on Pinterest and it reignited my love for the first game, I felt happy that I had something to take my mind off and goddamn revisiting the fandom years later is so bittersweet. I miss my old fandom mutuals, the blogs that used to update everyday were last active 5 years ago and most of the og fan artists had either rebranded or had left, one of them got hacked

Tumblr doesn’t make it easy for you to look up older posts, you have to rely on old blogs, Google or Pinterest (kinda made it my mission to archive what I can find)

There are new artists doing their own thing and I love that for them! Also people still write fanfics and update them, when I have the time I sketch out my fave characters and ships- it seems like there is a vocal community on tiktok but idk i don’t wanna go there

But it’s not what it was and I accept that, shit happens I’m glad I got to experience it during its peak and that I was left with good memories and content I can still enjoy

I’ve definitely seen shittier and deader fandoms

Before LiS and Steven universe there weren’t a lot of spaces that let you enjoy wlw ships, they were either upstaged by yaoi stuff or fetishized (deviantart) this game and its fan base helped me accept my identity as a lesbian, told me it’s not a fetish when two girls hold hands

[ladyofthelake]

Not talking about anyone here on tumblr with regards to this incoming rant just to make that clear you guys are awesome <3

Okay but on x some Jared fans really are getting on my nerves saying shit like how they miss him and using words like devastated because they aren't hugging him 24/7 and they've literally just been to a con

and Im here grieving my soul cat I FUCKING MISS HIM everyday is Hell without him I wish I could hug him like these Jared fans are gonna keep getting hugs from him because they go to every con

and I dunno but crying over inconsequential shit like oh I didn't hug my fave actor today I only hugged him last week sadface

the privilege is gross and it just really makes me feel shit barely anyone cared on X about when I posted about my cat dying all they care about is bragging about their cons and saying shit like this

and I'm not even jealous I don't care about hugging Jared if someone said I could right now that he's here I wouldn't care, even if it was Colin I wouldn't care right now, I just want my cat back the one who loved me unconditionally and so many people irl don't understand how much pets mean to someone

and like the girl at work who said nothing when I said my cat had died and tried to shove her puppy pic in my face and I told her as politely as possible (because all I want to do is cry) that I wasn't in the mood to look at the pic and I also said to her my life is shit right now and she said nothing to comfort then went on about how she's going on holiday to France next week. Cool. I don't fucking care. I've lost my soulmate and am shattered.

I think people need to relaise sometimes someone needs space and as long as they're not being an asshole about it its okay to not wanna talk or socialise. People go on about mental health but rarely actually help someone who is going through a rough time.

ugh this is why grief is the worst my mood is bad I miss my cat so much he always made my day and I'm lost and just so tired of seeing privileged people moaning about nothing when I've lost a piece of my heart

Just wanna say everyone on tumblr has been super lovely to me about my cat Sam and ily guys <3 and this is my home and seeing merlin gifs made me happy today even if Im still kinda taking a break

but x truly is a dumpster fire

Tumblr is my home always

also this is me venting and being in a heartbroken state at 3am

people are allowed to feel things and stuff of course, it just hurts me more right now because of everything so yeah ignore and hope you guys are doing good xx sorry if I have missed any notifs

[moonlight]

tagged by: @magnusedom thank u airam 😘

why did you choose your url? because it’s cute and short and i like it a lot.

any side blogs? i’m a part of quite a bit of source blogs like thehauntingsource, optional, horroredits, tvandfilm, chewbacca, mark-hoffmans, horrorgifs, filmreel, and dailyflicks.

how long have you been on tumblr? i was first on tumblr from 2012-2016 but then i deleted. then i got bored during the pandemic last year and remade my blog.

do you have a queue tag? since 98% of my posts are queued, i don’t see the point in having a queue tag.

why did you start your blog in the first place? the first time around it was because i wanted to be involved in the arctic monkeys fandom. the second time around was because of the pandemic and i got really bored and really missed giffing.

why did you choose your icon/pfp? it’s cute and it matches my url.

why did you choose your header? because amma crellin is one of my fave tv/book characters and she’s iconique.

what’s your post with the most notes? i think from my main blog it’s this takeshi kaneshiro gifset.

how many mutuals do you have? i don’t know, somewhere around 400-500 i think.

how many followers do you have? 0.

how many people do you follow? 555.

have you ever made a shitpost? sometimes when i’m bored.

how often do you use tumblr everyday? i check it every few hours or at the end of the day when i’m working or busy.

did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? nope i’m not a confrontational person.

how do you feel about “you need to reblog this”? i scroll past it.

do you like tag games? yeah but usually i’m too lazy to do them. 😅

do you like ask games? yeah they’re fun!

which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? maybe @animusrox

do you have a crush on a mutual? nope.

tagging: @vam-pyr @maddiecline @debickis @wongkarwaii @ellies @keanurevees @moebiius @natalieswood @isabelladjanis @capitals @daenerys-targaryen @colinfirth @anthonyhopkinz @rory-amy and anyone else who would like to do it 😊

[hvitserkk]

Tagged by @thedoctorfalls thank you cos i love these lol and I’m tagging:

@tulipjeanohare, @lunapascal, @beebuchanan, @sassynach, @thesewickedhands, @rae-gar-targaryen, @und0miels, @allthesebeautifulmistakes, @alinaaleks, @naomisnagata, @pixelfives, @janesfoster and @oetravia

1. why did you choose your url?

it’s just from one of my fave shows, vikings. literally no other thought lol

2. any side blogs?

a lot! the ones i made/own are ethereal-themes where i have my themes, resources, etc, @barnesdaily (with @jessie-meili), @animalkingdomdaily and then blogs i'm a part of are @vikingshistory, @thewitchersdaily, @marinasdaily, @tvandfilm, @qotsgifs, @thehauntingsource and @targaryensource i’m slacking on most of them, but i made a schedule to start making content for them all again!

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

since 2011, a longgg time ago

4. do you have a queue tag?

no i don’t, i don’t really get the reason to? i may be missing something here though because i see a lot of queue tags on the dash

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

well i had a domain for my website fansite blogs and then the group of friends i had from myspace all also had domains, and we all migrated here around the same time.

6. why did you choose your icon?

because i love bridgerton, especially anthony

7. why did you choose your header?

i don’t have one! i’ve wanted one, but i’m indecisive and kept changing it and trying to match everything

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

i’m actually not sure, how can i check? but from what i can tell it’s this broad city one with a whopping 84k and then a 20k this one of a daenerys one that’s a parallel of her destroying kings landing and the dragons and people who were killed

9. how many mutuals/followers do you have?

i have a bit over 2.6k followers and idk how many mutuals, but i usually follow back any fandom type of blog that follows me

10. how many people do you follow?

i’m following 473, i mostly follow other fan blogs, resource/theme blogs and ofc fandom type of blogs. 

11. have you ever made a shitpost?

very, very rarely, it’s not that i stick to an aesthetic or anything, i’m here mostly for the friends and gifs lol

12. how often do you use tumblr?

literally everyday, one of my main jobs is to make themes so i’m here a lot and it’s super easy to hit “dash” when i’m coding to take a break and just see what’s up

13. did you have a fight/argument with another blog? who won?

i don’t think so... irl i’m petty, but like hilariously petty, but never really online because idk what the other person’s situation is so i def don’t want to contribute to anything harmful 

14. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

those posts actually make me scroll past on purpose.. unless it’s like a resource link post, those i’ll reblog if i catch them

15. do you like tag/ask games?

YES, i get so excited when people send me stuff even if it’s one of those “you’re amazing send to 10 people” lol

16. which of your mutuals do you think are tumblr famous?

idk, i can think of maybe a few, but idk lol

17. do you have a crush on a mutual?

no, i’m not really here to crush on people.. i mean i see people post selfies, but the most i’ll do is like it and think “oh they’re pretty” and that’s about it. but same as @thedoctorfalls i think i have close friends

[naimee]

3.21.21/Day 18-21 of zoomester studyblr challenge. 

18- Tag someone who’s blog you constantly check.

I don’t really check, but I can tag someone I look forward to posting - @sapphic-dark-academia

19- Tell us about your online experience (is it sometimes overwhelming? Do you feel like its a great way to get in touch with people? What’s something that you love seeing on here?)

It’s complicated.

On one side, I really enjoy it. It’s definitely helps my creativity. Tumblr, TikTok, and Twitter, and Pinterest are my faves. I’ve found so many incredible artists who are passionate about their work, make me super excited about their work, and give me inspo for my own creations. I’ve met some amazing artists on here, man. People who have unexpectedly filled spaces in my life in ways I didn’t think they would, but am so so glad they did and continue to.

Zoom University ain’t it. At all. This semester is definitely easier than the last two, for obvious reasons, but I still struggle with it. I’m patient with myself though as I think everyone should be. It’s so funny because at one point, I thought the classroom gave me anxiety. Online classes produce a whole ‘nother kind of anxiety that I still haven’t been able to put into words - prob bc I have no desire to. But, it’s like, we move.

This semester I got more serious about prep for my classes, time management, organization, and like setting realistic goals for participating in my classes and interacting with classmates, so it’s def been better. And that naturally moved to my everyday, especially my hobbies and what I enjoy. I found studyblr. I found writeblr. Everyday, I’m more determined to go for what I want. It’s a challenging, but I’m thankful for what I’ve gained.

Also! I deleted Instagram for good last year. For me, personally, the growth in that alone is telling.

20- What are three things that inspire you?

Black kids having fun, being themselves

Studyblr for sure

Libraries (God, do I miss libraries)

21- Share a quote that speaks to you.

“The hatred and our anger is very different. Hatred is the fury of those who do not share our goals, and its object is death and destruction. Anger is a grief of distortions between peers, and its object is change.”

                                                               - from “sister outsider” by audre lorde.

[P.S. Those photographs were taken by Jamel Shabazz. If you haven’t heard of him, please look at his work. You won’t regret it.]

[spikesbimbo]

hi valentine !! this is fia [@kawaiinishii] using her undercover acc bc i'm currently running away from my tumblr responsibilities 🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️ anyways congratulations on 500, i'm so proud of you !! u deserve all these followers because you're such a great writer <33 i haven't talked to you yet but i hope to get to know u more soon 💖💖

for the event:

song: amtrak by los retros

fave boy: shugo meian

description about myself: everything is in my about me post !! you can check it there 😙✌️

oh and it'll be nsfw :)) thank you so much in advanced !! i'll try to talk to u soon when i'm not busy with my studies anymore <33 i hope u're having a great day n good luck with writing 😽💓

Ive been waiting for this one TURN IT UP!!🤪

For time has proved

That I, do love you

A way to make our time last forever?

Because I begin to miss you

Relationship hcs

Okay no matter how tall you are this man will beat you in height.

Loves to scoop you up in his arms at the most random times, while you're scared that he's gonna drop you being so far up.

Takes you very seriously even though he's chaotic.

Like keeping all the origami cranes you made him after saying they were good luck, even keeping one is his duffel bag when he goes to practice/ his games.

Speaking of games, he loves when you can make it to one. Immediately spotting your boyfriend towering over everyone else, waving at him leading to a big grin on his face.

Flirts with you like he's still trying to win you over. Always holding onto your hand and completing you.

Always blowing up your phone, waking up with 20 new messages from him everyday.

Facetimes you whenever he gets lonely while he's away.

Nsfw hcs

Size kink duh.

Loves how tiny you are under him, struggling to take him.

Whenever you switch languages while yall fuck he lovessss that.

Calls you every pet name he can while he's in you.

Also dirty talk, this man never shuts up.

Loves oral, giving and receiving, esp when you can't talk cause his dicks in your mouth, or he's doing such a good job that you can't speak. 

And morning sex/cuddle fucking is very common, as he is very needy for some love and attention.

[thefutureduchessmarie]

Do you mind if I ask why you dont post about Eric anymore?

I do feel like saying that I still do. Just not as much anymore. But I get what you’re saying, and the short answer is that I outgrew it a bit. The long answer (that kinda doubles up as my Tumblr Origin story too) is that I knew Eric had found success in the Premier League & England NT after he left Sporting, but I had no idea that he was one of the most popular players, and half of one of the most popular ships on Tumblr’s football fandom. Hell, I didnt even know such a fandom existed. So when I first found out about it, I became instantly obsessed. Our Eric? A fangirl’s dream? Seemed crazy and not like the type of thing that happens to players who leave our Academy.  So I dig deep into his and Deledier’s tags. I started following blogs. I liked all the posts, so that I could look at them over and over. Until one day I decided to reactivate this blog and slowly but surely join this fandom. This was all post WC 2018, when the Premier League fandom was thriving, but Eric not so much. I learned about most of his interviews and adventures after they had happened, as he recovered from many injuries and illnesses. I became very emotionally invested in his recovery and I overall, I think the whole thing consumed me before I even had time to ask myself why Eric Dier was even my favorite.

Because the truth is, while there’s a looooooooot of things I like and admire about him, objectively speaking I don’t think he’s my number one at any of them. He’s not my favorite player or former Sporting player; not my favorite leader; not the one I admire the most off pitch; not even the one I find the most attractive. And the the thing is, being in the fandom, meant that I found others who did fill those categories for me. Players and leaders I admired more, players whose interviews and life off the pitch I was more captivated by.  I remember talking about this with @manuelmueller, who assured me that our faves find us, and not the other way around. And while that made sense to me at the time, I guess the realization always stayed with me...  Simultaneously, 3 things happened: 1) I progressively stopped caring about Spurs after Poch left

2) I started to realize that I dint really relate or felt connected to Dele outside of the jokes and banter he shared with Eric. Nothing against, just nothing particularly “pro” either. So I unfollowed him on social media, stopped keeping up with his life and blogging about him so much. 

3) Over the summer the Deledier fandom became the center of a lot of drama that I just didnt vibe with and I decided I needed to step away from all of that. I unfollowed most Deledier blogs, stopped sharing Deledier content, and even deleted the “Deledier in 2020″ posts I had on my drafts, as a follow-up to the retrospective I’d done in 2019 (sorry to anyone who liked and supported those, btw). Now, why am I mentioning Deledier, you ask? Because like I stated above, Eric and Deledier had always gone hand in hand for me, when it comes to fandom. So I think when I stepped away from one, it unconsciously led me to step away from the other a bit as well. If nothing else, because I started seeing less Eric content  after that unfollowing spree.  I still see his face almost everyday on my dash, and some times I still feel the urge to hit the reblog button. But that initial hyper fixation, that need to reblog everything little thing about him, sometimes multiples times, is definitely gone. I do still love him and admire the way he lives his life, his sense of style, how close to his family he is, his weird Portuguese accent, how eloquent he can be, how he makes an effort to learn, what a good leader he is, etc.. And Im so happy to see him healthy and fit and thriving. But most of the time Im happy to feel all these things at a distance these days.  These things happen with fandom. Sometimes its hard to keep the hyperfixation for too long, so eventually we move on to other things that catch out attention more. And this has basically been a very, very long way of saying that Anyway, thanks for asking. If you miss Eric content, there’s still plenty of lovely logs gushing about him on a daily basis 

[purplesurveys]

996

This is originally an ask game that’s making the rounds here on Tumblr, but in this blog of course I answer everything. Quarantine Ask Game; questions by ghostly-nblm What’s your go-to snack? I haven’t really have one throughout this lockdown. I just snack on whatever’s available in our pantry - usually we have potato chips, salted egg chips, nuts, etc. And then sometimes my dad will whip up something for us himself, like wicked Oreos, churros, corndogs, and chocolate chip cookies. What’s a movie you could watch over and over? I could probably watch The Proposal everyday for the rest of my life and I doubt you’ll hear a complaint out of me. It’s just so funny, so lighthearted, and the entire cast meshes very well together. Favorite show to binge? Again when it comes to comfort shows/movies, I pick the lighthearted ones because they get me to relax and laugh a lot. That said, my favorite show to binge would be Friends. I recently started binge-watching it again and it feels good to come back to it after several months of not seeing an episode. 5 songs that make you want to dance? Shut Up And Dance - Walk the Moon Cinnamon - Hayley Williams Don’t Start Now - Dua Lipa Caught in the Middle - Paramore 7/11 - Beyoncé So, basically, Top 40 shit because it’s that genre that produces the most dance-y songs anyway. Pls don’t judge lmaaaaaao I like other artists I swear

5 songs that make you feel less lonely? I don’t know if I’ve ever turned to music to feel less lonely...I never really seek out that particular feeling. If anything, I listen to certain songs because I feel alone and I would want it to stay that way for the meantime.

Favorite meal to cook yourself? I always blank out at these cooking questions because I don’t know how to make anything, soz. When I start earning my own money I swear I’ll start experimenting with ingredients in the kitchen. You heard it here first. Seriously guys, when I finally get a stable income and you notice me spending it on unnecessary shit, feel free to nag me and tell me to start cooking!!! How do you “treat yourself”? With food. Food has always been my reward to myself after a long week, a hard exam, a bloody presentation, and basically after getting through something I had been dreading for a long time.   Favorite thing to do when doing self care? Surveys. Who have you been talking to the most? My family, I guess. “The most” is really pushing it though; I don’t talk a lot these days and it’s been difficult for me to sustain a conversation and not drain my battery in the middle of it. One thing you really miss right now? The past. I normally don’t think about it, but if there’s something from the past that I do miss, I end up pining hard for it. If you could be self-isolated with anyone who would it be? Angela. We haven’t seen one another in seven months so we could definitely do with spending seven months together lmao. We miss the shit out of each other. Do you have any pets? Yes :) Small update on my dogs: so for the last four months Kimi has hated having Cooper around and snarls every time he senses he’s nearby. But, and we have no clue what changed, now he has started humping Cooper and wants to be near him all the time...ugh. Favorite video games? At the early early phase of the lockdown I played Mario Kart 8 on the Switch all day long. Then for some reason I stopped and I haven’t played since like April. I haven’t played other video games. Favorite podcasts? Ear Biscuits. Andi has also started their own podcast and it debuted like a week ago; it looks extremely promising, but I’m super behind since I’ve deleted all my socials. I’ll catch up once I’m in the right state of mind and am feeling better enough to come back on my accounts. Favorite YouTubers? The main channels I watch are Good Mythical Morning and The Try Guys. But throughout the quarantine sooooooo many local celebrities have started their own vlog channels and majority of them are super fun to watch. My faves would be Andi Manzano’s, Manny Pacquiao’s daughter Mary’s, and Bea Alonzo’s. Wake up time? These days I try to be out of bed by 8:30 so I can sufficiently prepare and clean up for work, but early on in the lockdown I liked staying up all night and then waking up at like 9 or 10 AM. Sleep time? Anywhere from 10 PM to 1 AM. If you could go anywhere right now where would it be? I’d be in Sagada, vacationing by myself and doing some hiking, spelunking, reflecting, and soul-searching. I wish I can go back there someday; I just reallllly need to be out of the house and out of the city for a while.

What’s a change you want to keep when self isolation is over? There is nothing I wish to keep from this quarantine. It turned my entire life around and I wish I had all the things I had before it instead. Have you learned something? Yeah. Some of them the hard way. Any new skills? I took up a course on marketing last month so that was a lot of fun. Hobby-wise, I’ve been thinking of getting into cross-stitching so I can’t wait to buy my own kit and start with that. I’m also learning a lot of new and super helpful skills at work, like coming up with PR tactics/executions, knowing what will work for a client and what wouldn’t, photo editing, etc. It’s been the best internship experience ever. What’s a hobby you’d like to start learning? ^ The latter. I’d also love to learn how to bake, and maybe? start a vlog because it’d be nice to have an outlet where I can express myself and do new things while sharing my experiences with other people. What’s something you’d like to get better at? I constantly want to improve at my job because perfectionism. What food do you wish you had right now? Coffee shop pastries. :( God I haven’t had one of those in a while; I miss them loads. Your go to quarantine outfit? I don’t have one but man, when I do go out I tend to overdress because I rarely get an opportunity or have a reason to drive out these days, so I allow myself to look cute and all dressed up even if I’m just meant to pick up food at my grandma’s or something. What have you done today? I’ve been taking this survey, taken a shower, cried for a half hour, played with Cooper, cradled Kimi like a baby, checked my emails, and taken a few sips of coffee. Any plans for tomorrow? Work work work. What’s on your “to watch” list? The second volume of Unsolved Mysteries is finally out on Netflix so I’m hoping I get around to watching a few episodes soon. Any musicians/bands you’ve discovered? Most recent one was Chase Atlantic but I discovered them like back in July. Since I’m not listening to a lot of music these days, I’m not expecting to find new bands or singers to get into any time soon. Post a selfie right now!! Eh. Post pictures of your pets! I don’t feel like raking through my photos this morning. Maybe some other time. When was the last time you drank water? Last night at dinner. When was the last time you ate? Last night. When was the last time you got up and stretched? I can’t remember when I last did that. I usually stretch in bed, though.

Favorite song right now? This has been asked on every damn survey recently. I’m sure you’ll find my answer within the first page of my blog. Favorite social media to scroll through? It used to be Twitter until the lockdown hit and everyone stopped going out and having interesting updates. Before I deactivated everything, I loved spending time on Facebook. What’s the last thing you ate? A slice of pizza. What’s the weather like where you are? It’s a little cloudy and cold. I’m expecting it to rain today. Have you been playing animal crossing? No, but I know so many people who have been. How are you feeling? 50% meh, 50% just going through the motions. Who’s the last person you texted? Ate Alyanna. We’re both going through rough patches at the moment so we were cheering one another up. I needed that positivity a lot this morning and I’m glad we had that interaction. What does your last text message say with no context? ”Waaaaaaaa cute” Post a meme that made you laugh recently:

Outdoor activity you’d like to do right now? Hiking, mountain climbing, camping. Anything that’ll help me get disconnected from the world for a few days, really. Something you’re looking forward to when quarantine is over? Doing all those ^, traveling, being able to actually go to a workplace (once I have one), seeing my friends, going to bars again. Someone you’d like to see when quarantine is over? Everybody, man. I don’t give a shit as to who it is. Any new games coming out you want to play? Not really. I’m just waiting on GTA 6 even though there’s been like 0 updates on that front. New shows you’ve discovered? I revisited The Crown, but that’s it. I haven’t discovered anything new. Most comfortable piece of clothing you have? I find all of them comfortable; that’s why I wear them at home haha.

[seblore]

everyday i wake up and you still havent posted your evermore rant </3

there u go boo 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

GDBDNSKDJHHDDNDS GIRL................ ok so i very cleverly avoided ranking folklore because every song REALLY HIT and the whole album was just SO.. SO.. yeah. i can however rank miss evermore. i dont want to compare the two album i do not get the point in that. both give off really different vibes. now what i will say is with folklore, AS AN ALBUM, it is just a master masterpiece. The songs flowed amazingly with each other and really held you close the entire first listen. at least thats what I felt like <3 with evermore however, the individual songs are OMG!!! THERE IS LITERALLY NO SONG I DONT LIKE FROM ANY OF THE TWO ALBUMS. but as an album on the first listen i did feel a bit disconnected from evermore which didnt happen to me with folklore. why i think that might’ve happened is BECAUSE taylor is just so brilliant m8.... the MASSIVE contrasting emotions between the songs was too much for my little brain to handle.

Ok so now that’s out of the way dhsjsk time for rankings :) i have no idea where im going to put each song im just going to make it up as we go <3 ill ALSO give you my fave lyrics from each if I remember it <333 (oh and also you’ll notice marjorie isnt here. im sorry but i never listened to it after the first listen because it hits a little too close to home and i dont want to unpack all of that now im sorry! it is a beautiful song)

14. Closure: she popped off <3 she really said dont treat me like a situation that needs to be handled 💃🤙💯 a beautiful song with beautiful lyrics HOWEVER its the first song i couldnt connect with thus it’s down here BUT I STILL WOULD LISTEN TO IT ON REPEAT THO... the last in my ranking but still fucks 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️ thats taylor swift 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

13. long story short: i have never been in a relationship ever BUT GODDAMN ‘pushed from the precipice, clung to the nearest lips’ hdjsksksjjddjnBbdns jddd ubebs!:!?:?:$3&39383$hzjs WOAH.... and this bitch really summarized the full 2016 drama with long story short it was a bad time. HILARITY. yeah not much to say here tho this is just the ‘at least one mandatory song to shake your tits to on each ts album’ song of evermore <3 and always remember that if the shoe fits walk in it TILL YOUR HIGH HEELS BREAK WOOH ANDIFELLDOWNTHEPEDESTALRIGHTDOWNTHERA—

12: dorothea: making a lark of misery :D RENt free. i had to listen to ‘if youre tired of being known for who you know you know youll always know me’ 113 times to finally understand it tho 😐 some of us are stupid and illiterate have you ever thought about that miss swift???? anyways TINGTINGTINGINGINGING THE STARS IN YOUR EYES SHINED BRIGHTER IN TUPELO <33333 such an innocent feel good song I LOVE!!!!!

11. ivy: the goddamn here and the hush of mirrorball ARE THE REASON IM STILL ALIVE 😽 another lyrical masterclass <3 ‘id live and die for moments that we stole on begged and borrowed time’ IS2G!!!!!!!!!!! anyways what if you cheated on your husband with me and i cheated on my husband with you and my pain fit in the palm of your freezing hands 😳 JK JK 😅 unless...... 🤪😏 hdjsks yeah this song is magnificently cursed and i am in love with it 🧎‍♀️

10. tis the damn season: this song is august but the other side of the coin. august but four months later. AUGUST SLIPPED AWAY LIKE A BOTTLE OF WINE- THE HOLIDAYS LINGER LIKE A BAD PERFUMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE... she sounds so pretty goshhh! ‘time flies messy as the mud on your truck tires NOW IM MISSING YOUR SMILE hear me out we could just ride around and the road not taken looks real good now’ is on repeat in my mind. and as always the bridge ::::::::::::::.............:::::::::::::: how does she do this everytime. ‘and wonder about the only soul who can tell which smiles im faking’ 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️ after every ts song i listen my expectations about true love grows exponentially and my chances of finding true love falls exponentially simultaneously ADIEU.

9. willow: she really took the invisible string quartet and put it in huh..................... FUCKED IN THE HEADDDDDDDDDDDDDD. what can i say <3 its just such a pretty song <3 hashtag gorgeous hashtag i cant say anything to its face. WRECK MY PLANS!!!!!! WRECK IT BITCH!!! ‘wait for the signal and ill meet you after dark’ LOVE STORY WHIPLASH. also mate i cant even focus on the song she looks SO GOOD in the music video i—

8. happiness: !!!! what can i say.... one of the best songs of the album hands down. lyrical masterpiece AND musically rich. she really logged into tumblr dot com and typed out ‘THERE’LL BE HAPPINESS AFTER YOU’ AND ‘THERE WAS HAPPINESS BECAUSE OF YOU’ ARE IDEAS THAT CAN COEXIST and logged off...... h8 her and her insanity. the one word i have to describe this song is: picturesque. tis a picturesque song <3 oh and dfbhhffcbhDDVHHTRSDVJK when i heard ‘i hope she’ll be a beautiful fool who takes my spot next to you’ i audibly GASPED and then she says ‘no i didnt mean that sorry i cant see facts through all of my fury’................. i fell out of my chair. IT FELT LIKE AS IF SHE HEARD MY GASP AND TOLD ME SPECIFICALLY THAT NO SHE DIDNT MEAN IT LIKE THAT... anyways yeah. ill write an article one day named THE SWIFT DECEPTION OF TAYLOR about how she keeps writing songs with deceptive titles and this will be the opening case 😈🤙 also the fact that this is one of my faves and i put it in number 8 says a lot......

7. evermore: i havent recovered from ‘motion capture. put me in a bad light’. i mean come on the whole goddamn song is a lyrical masterpiece. ‘writing letters addressed to the fire’. IS SHE OK!????????????? i think tf not. beautiful song beautiful arrangement. iver sounded really good too. and lol lol rofl WOOFWOOFbarkbark ‘HEY DECEMBER GUESS IM FEELING UNMOORED’ unmoored definition from google dot com: no longer attached. she doesn’t go back to december anymore. about2 faint oml. long story short: i did not survive. THIS PAIN WOULD BE FOR EVERMORE........ what i felt with this song is that she took the quarantine sadness we all felt at least once this year and made it into a masterpiece of a song. couldve been easily the top song on any album except this. no i will not elaborate <3

6. no body no crime: i cannot believe. she teased us with a musical number. this woman teased us with. a musical number. I THINK SHE IS WRITING A MUSICAL BUT I JUST CANT PROVE IT! when she wins that tony 16 years later call me prophetic xoxo. anyways yeah she literally wrote this to flex her storytelling abilities. send tweet 🐥

5. cowboy like me: YEEEHAWWW I’LL BE HONEST WITH YOU I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT THE FULL SONG SOUNDS LIKE I JUST HAVE THE BRIDGE ON REPEAT!!!! OMFG!!! the skeletons in both our closets plotted hard to fuck this up. AAAA!! ??? STFU. IM NOT EVEN TALKING ABOUT THE LYRICS MATE THE WAY ITS SUNG!!!!!!! GUT WRENCHING! the best bridge she has ever written musically. i cant stop listening to it. REALLYYY DID BELIEEEVE I WAS THE ONEEE. STORIESSS ABOUT WHEEEN YOU PASSSEDDD THROUGHH TOWN. y e l l. and then she hits me with ‘now you hang from my lips like the gardens of babylon.’ L ???? M !!!!! A $$$$$ O “”””” i had to pause it and sit there for 10 minutes to take in what i had just heard. case closed critical hit sustained yeedhawd.

4. tolerate it: i cried. the only reason it’s not 1 is because it hurt me too much. WHAT THE FUCK YOU MF YOU ASSUME IM FINE BUT WYD IF I BREAK FREE AND LEAVE US IN THE RUINS???? TOOK THIS DAGGER IN ME AND REMOV— m8 this physically hurts me everytime. if its all in my head TELL ME RN. aghhh aRghhhhhhh. pain. and lol she broke down sleep to its bare essentials ‘breathing with your eyes closed’.

3. ??? coney island: i know it’s a bit of a controversial top three but WHO CARES 🕴this is solely here for ‘AND IM SITTING ON A BENCH IN CONEY ISLAND wondering where did my BABYy GO’ im shaking. my bed is shaking. my body is shaking. my pupils are shaking. THE WAY SHE SINGS IT OH MY GOODNESS ME i have to lie down gimme a sec. ‘and if this is the long haul howd we get here so soon 😟’ SCREAM. and when i was hearing it for the first time and she said ‘sorry for not making you my centerfold’ i was like yeah and?? so what?? and then she hits me with ‘over and over’...... so she didnt make him/her/them her centerfold over and over !!!!!!! she is sorry she didnt do it over and over!!!!!! mannn.... the chorus.. i shall not speak. i am held at gunpoint i CANNOT SPEAK. the bridge tho dhdnsksksjsb I CAN SPEAK AND I SHALL SPEAK. BITCH WENT OFFFFFFFF. <3 this is the apology she deserved from her exes which she never got so she wrote it herself. podium. grey skies. birthday cake. ACCIDENT. im laughingggggggggggg <///3 and yeah so overall it is a really yummy song with yummy vocals and yummy arrangement 9/10 would recommend. also!! life lessons kids life lessons. disappointments? SIMPLY CLOSE YOUR EYES AND PRETEND YOU DO NOT SEE IT YAAAAAAAAAS

2. gold rush: ETHEREAL!!!!!! The last time i felt like this™️ whilst listening to a song was with mirrorball <3 the production of this song omg omg omg LOVE 💃 but what propelled it to number two status was the ‘i dont like slow motion double vision in ROSE BLUSH/ i dont like that falling feels like flying till the BONE CRUSH’ imagine how fucked in the head a person needs to be to rhyme rose blush with bone crush. yeah i have nothing more to say really this song is extremely gorgeous and ‘eyes like sinking ships on water so inviting i almost jumped in’ / ‘walk past quick brush’ ?:!:!&:8483 F A V E <33333 and the transition transmission transfusion from ‘... gray old tea cuz itll never be ᵍˡᵉᵃᵃᵃᵃᵐⁱⁿᵍ ᵗʷⁱⁿᵏˡⁱⁿᵍᵍᵍᵍ’ MADAME

1. champagne problems: are we surprised? ARE WE REALLY SURPRISED? when listening to new albums i normally listen to it at one go in order. i stick to that rule. HOWEVER after many years of my solid album listening self made rule tm i finally broke and immediately replayed this mf song after listening to it once. ‘you had a speech, youre speechless/ love slipped beyond your reaches’???? stfu???? VILE. PUNISHABLE. DEROGATORY. and welp the entire bridge ...... .... ........... what can i say. And the parallels to miss all too well??? WHAT WAS THE REASON???? your SISTER splashed out on the bottle- left my scarf there at your SISTER’s house 😐 she’ll patch up your tapestry that i SHRED- maybe this thing was a masterpiece till you TORE it all up 😐 your MOM’s ring in your pocket- your MOTHER’s telling stories bout you on the tee ball team 😐 November flush and your FLANNEL cure- PLAID shirt days and nights when you made me your own 😐 wHAT A SHAME SHE IS FUCKED IN THE HEAD IS2G........... and also why would she not rhyme POCKET with LOCKET?????? why with wallet???????????? slant rhyme why????????????? AND THE NOTE THIS MF SONG ENDS ON..... FUCKED IN THE HEAD

THATS IT. i really sat here and did this for the past 2 hours huh...... hhdjsms anyways LONG STORY SHORT: I HATE ONE INSANE WOMAN AND HER NAME IS TAYLOR ALISON SWIFT. GODSPEEED 🏃‍♀️

[panelshowsource]

a note about women’s month 💘

thank you to everyone who voted in the fave female panelists poll this year! last year was a blast and this year was even better! we’ve seen more woman on tv this year — and some improved, though grossly insufficient, diversity within that — and i love celebrating that with you everyday!

last year, i wrote this:

the lack of diversity in british comedy is an alarming issue that has only recently become headline news. statistics presented by this study, based on 50 years of panel shows and over 4,700 individual episodes, are beyond disappointing for women (here is an easy-to-read graph by series & by year); similar disappointment stems from the lineups at popular comedy festivals, like edinburgh. in 2014, the head of tv at the bbc promised to end all-male comedy shows, a “step in the right direction” that hasn’t been without fear of tokenism, fair criticism as well as some naysayers. women, people of colour, lgbt peoples, those differently-abled and those all of the above and in between are just as funny as cis-identifying white men and deserve a place on our screens. watch their standup, buy their books, stream their videos, listen to their podcasts, comment on and like their content, follow their social media. this support can directly help women become more visible in british comedy.

in the last year, have you been actively conscious of supporting women in comedy? i’d like to take a moment to talk about some ways you can do that :)

➡ from feminist discourse to tales of humans & their dogs to ghost stories, these women are providing some of the most touching, stimulating, and funny reading coming out of comedy:

How to be Champion: My Autobiography by Sarah Millican

Animal: The Autobiography of a Female Body by Sara Pascoe

The Guilty Feminist: From our noble goals to our worst hypocrisies by Deborah Frances-White

The Actual One: How I Tried, and Failed, to Avoid Adulthood Forever by Isy Suttie

Cheer Up Love: Adventures in Depression with the Crab of Hate by Susan Calman

The More You Ignore Me by Jo Brand

Can't Stand Up for Sitting Down: A Memoir by Jo Brand

Look Back in Hunger: The Autobiography by Jo Brand

Born Lippy: How to Do Female by Jo Brand

Is It Just Me? by Miranda Hart

Peggy & Me by Miranda Hart

Nina Is Not OK by Shappi Khorsandi

A Beginner's Guide to Acting English: A Memoir by Shappi Khorsandi

Spectacles: A Memoir by Sue Perkins

East of Croydon: Blunderings through India and South East Asia by Sue Perkins

Once More, with Feeling: How We Tried to Make the Greatest Porn Film Ever by Victoria Coren Mitchell and Charlie Skelton

For Richer, For Poorer: A Love Affair with Poker by Victoria Coren Mitchell

Dead Funny: Horror Stories by Comedians featuring Sara Pascoe, Katy Brand, and Danielle Ward

...and that’s just to name a handful! my fingers would need a 5 min power nap if i tried typing out all of susie dent’s books 💪

➡ this is a list of a lot relevant active podcasts coming out of britain right now (though it is missing, most notably, off menu). for example, if you liked alice levine on taskmaster, why not listen to her podcast? or watch/listen her on rhlstp? this is such a fun way to get more deeply involved in the comedy of some of your favourite ladies! might i recommend isy suttie’s the things we do for love, anneka harry’s brown bread, or box set go! with nicola stephenson (the newest ep features rebecca front!)? most of these are free, or they can be found/requested at /r/notapanelshow p.s. suzi ruffell, rosie jones, tiff stevenson and more are scheduled to appear on rhlstp this season 😍

➡ here is a list of some radio programmes currently on the air. while it does look stacked with men (because it is), women do feature on so many of these series and absolutely smash it! did you know sandi toksvig hosted the news quiz for almost ten years, and its regular panelists include susan calman, rebecca front, zoe lyons, and more? or that victoria coren mitchell has hosted heresy since 2006 (because there’s nothing she can’t do)? or that sarah millican, jo brand, and sally phillips have each hosted series of the museum of curiosity? these are all on the masterpost! 👏 p.s. you can always search for and/or request more radio shows at /r/panelshow or, if they’re not panel radio shows, /r/notapanelshow :)

➡ social 👏 media 👏 determines 👏 relevancy 👏 do i agree with this system? no. is this the system entertainers are currently slaves to? yes. do you follow your favourite women on twitter, instagram, youtube, etc? one click. one like. one retweet. one reblog. here is a list of some of the comedians i follow on twitter to get you started — all of your faves are on there! when you like something they are on, tweet about it! tag them, the network, the channel, use the hashtags, post pictures! tell channels like dave or people like richard osman who your faves are, who deserves more exposure, who you want to see in the future! we’re already obsessing over how much we like these ladies anyways, so why not make that obsession even more visibile?

➡ we have a really sweet, modest community here of at least 10,000 people. this is not something i’ve ever talked about because i don’t want what i’m going to say to be misconstrued as begging for notes — that is not my concern. but you may have heard people on this site talk about something called the like/reblog ratio. a lot of creators are concerned that, apart from tumblr’s ever-evolving ludicrous algorithms murdering their visibility, people are so obsessed with their blog aesthetics that they’re not actually reblogging everything they like. here’s a couple of my gifset details, one from a nicher post and one from a more popular post:

while i appreciate any notes, numbers likes these aren’t always encouraging. i’m not here to tell you how to enjoy your spare time and interests, or to criticise people who enjoy aesthetic. i just want to point out that if you want someone to be successful, you play a direct part in promoting them and spreading their art. as the years pass, this becomes more and more true. i know how much you all love these ladies — i get messages about them every single day — but it’s a simple fact that a gifset of james acaster or noel fielding or richard ayoade or david mitchell is going to get more notes than a post about any of the women who placed in the top 5 of this poll. i am not bringing this up to this make anyone feel guilty about what they enjoy; i only hope my mentioning this encourages you to be conscientious when participating on social media, especially when your interest lies in the products of a grossly unjust industry that is taking a lot fucking time to get itself on the right track. more followers on a comedian’s twitter = more work for that comedian, because that’s simply the direction the film & tv industry is going. if your follow yields that much power, why not use it for good?

please support women. if you buy one of their books, please message me and tell me which one! if you think one of them is shining on a radio programme and we’re sleeping on her, please let me know (timestamps appreciated!)! if one starts a gofundme or patreon to start a podcast or a tour, please donate 50p and then send me the link! there is always more we can be doing and we are always underestimating what even smallest amount of support means for their bigger picture. i don’t have all the answers, but i love the feeling i get when i believe society is evolving in the right direction. rose matafeo won the edinburgh comedy award in 2018, and sarah keyworth and kiri pritchard-mclean took the top awards at the 2019 chortle awards. women are here to stay and they’re fucking killing it. because duh ❣️

if you took the time to read this, i appreciate you x

[higgins5]

Tag game

Oof, this is so so late, but I am doing it! And thank you to the lovely @foxsoulcourt for tagging me!

LAST

drink: Water, we are being healthy children here 

phone call: My District Manager at work to discuss my transfer

text message: One of my best friends about his terrible life choices (jk but really binge watching a show for 14 hours straight? Boy get to sleep!)

song you listened to: I’m Over You by Bryan James (it may or may not have been on loop for a while)

time you cried: Last Thursday 

EVER

dated someone twice: Haha, yep. Didn’t work out, but we’re still friends

kissed someone and regretted it: Not yet!

been cheated on: Unfortunately

lost someone special: I think we all have, but such is life

gotten drunk and thrown up: Oh god no

fave colors? Sea green, storm gray, oh I can’t believe i almost forgot! Really any deep blue or purple, like how the night sky gets just before it’s almost black

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE I?

made new friends: Multiple, and i am so greatly for all of the lovely people who have graced my life

fallen out of love: Not so much people. But things I believed I loved turned a little false, yes

laughed until you cried: Gosh, all the time. It’s awful, I call it my seal laugh because I’m laughing so hard I can’t breathe and i’m just doubled over hitting a table or my leg to express my joy because that’s all I can do

found out someone was talking about you: Just two weeks ago! And honestly I hate that. Like if you’re gonna talk bad about me just do it to my face. I’ll find out one way or another, might as well be from you

met someone who changed you: Some good people, some not so good people. But I believe it was all for a reason

found out who your friends are: Yes

kissed someone on your Facebook friends list: Hmm... Well, I do not actually have a Facebook so I guess that would be a no

GENERAL

how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: I guess I can clarify about FB here. My parents were always freaked out about the internet so never let me get one, and being a good child I never did- plus I was just not interested, so I just... never got around to it in adulthood. AND like whenever I needed to talk to a friend through FB I just used my parents page cause that was their solution, so there was no real need. But like, from the friends I had on my mom’s page yes, I know all of them irl

do you have any pets: SEVERAL AND I LOVE ALL OF MY FURRY CHILDREN! I have an 11yo poodle/terrier mix (mom was a poodle, dad was the terrier next door. Truly a scandal) named Bear and i love my grumpy old man to death; a 2yo boxer/husky mix we rescued that was originally supposed to be a lab which was a total lie named Nutmeg, but it’s okay I love my babe even if i can take her on a 3mi run and she’s still ready to run 3 more; an 8yo wonderfully affectionate and beautiful tabby cat named Willow; a 6 year old (oh my god, she’s 6, it feels like yesterday she was a satellite dish in a collar that meowed) purring machine tabby cat named Sage; and two beautiful girls. Lagertha and Gwenievere are two very playful and loving one year old dumbo eared rats

do you want to change your name: Eh, not really. I’ve had it for this long, might as well keep it

what did you do for your last birthday: Oh that was so fun. I went to the Melting pot (this fancy fondue place, so good) With a couple of friends and had a really great time, even though someone got me crayons as a gag gift (I.... hate, crayons with a PASSION, but she’s known me for like 10 years so of course I accepted.... hesitantly)

what time did you wake up today: Like 7:30? but i didn’t actually leave my bed until 9ish because don’t be fooled, I am not a morning person. I just run because I’m an idiot

what were you doing last night at midnight: Sleeping

what is something you can’t wait for: Figure out where life is taking me and then be a bomb ass bitch at it

what are you listening to right now: X&Y by Coldplay

have you ever talked to a person named Tom: I have, and he is a lovely person. Go talk to a Tom everybody, nice people

something that gets on your nerves: Horrible people. Like just those people that are horrible for no absolute reason. Like grow up, get a life, why do you have to make other people just because you’re unhappy. there are many people you could see for help and I have a number you can call if you need a recommendation 

most visited website: Probably a tie between Tumblr, Youtube, and Spotify

hair color: Well, naturally I am blonde but rn it’s a reddish auburn color (but hey, people ask me all the time if it’s my natural color so who knows maybe i was destined for this shade)

long or short hair: ish? It’s growing from a pixie (that I might go back to soon) so its like... not quite shoulder length yet but give it another month and we might be there

what do you like about yourself: You know what, i’m gonna give myself some love and say everything. Lol, but as a serious answer probably my personality/nature. I have a very big heart but am also incredibly sarcastic so it is a delicate balance 

want any piercings: SO many. I’m saving up to get my nose done soon (nostril) and later I’ll get my daith, helix, third piercing in my lobe, tragus, and maybe rook

blood type: Some kinda O? Honestly for someone who donates blood as much as I do, I should really know (but important blood donation note, if you wish to make sure not to do it too frequently! Healthy people = healthy blood = healthy donation receivers!)

nicknames: Gosh, too many to type. Apparently I’m just nick namey. But uhhh, the most common: Ash, Ashbash, Higgins, Higgy, Higgs, Figgins, Chief 

relationship status: Single

zodiac sign: I’m one of the twin fish babes, Pisces all the way

pronouns: She/Her

fave tv show: Don’t watch as much tv as I used to but Supernatural is always a good go to (recently I’ve been watching a lot of HGTv and doctor Phil and Hallmark with my mom though, if that’s anything)

tattoos: None (yet)

right or left handed: right handed, I’m basically useless with my left (unless an instrument is involved)

ever had surgery: Nope, and hopefully we keep that trend goin!

piercings: two ear piercings 

sports: Uh... in High School I was pretty active and track and I was a competitive shooter (air rifles- but I’m from Texas so). Nothing in college at the moment, I might try out for the track team just cause i miss bein a part of stuff

vacation: I am broke, I can only dream (but I do really wanna travel, so gotta save up!)

trainers: my totally stylish suede brown vans are my go to, but Adidas for running

eating: Currently? Nothing, but I did have some steamed broccoli and carrots&rice, and grilled chicken for dinner

drinking: Orange Juice

I’m about to watch: Absolutely nothing

waiting for: Didn’t I already answer this? it’s so much pressure. Uh... change?

want: To be successful in whatever I 

get married: Eventually

career: Haven’t gotten there yet, but everyday is one step closer

hugs or kisses: Depends on who and when

lips or eyes: Eyes. First thing I notice

shorter or taller: At 5′3 I don’t think I can even pretend to say i’m tall

older or younger: I probably fall more on the younger spectrum

nice arms or stomach: Yes

hookup or relationships: I am a committed relationship kinda person all the way. Never really understood the whole hookup thing but to each their own

troublemaker or hesitant: A hesitant troublemaker is probably more me. I say I try to stay out of trouble, but it just kinda finds me

HAVE I EVER?

kissed a stranger: No

drunk hard liquor: Yes

lost glasses: Ugh, all the time, worst is when I lose my contacts AND glasses

turned someone down: Yes

sex on the first date: Not my style

broken someone’s heart: Yes

had your heart broken: In love and life

been arrested: Nope, and i’d like to keep it that way!

cried when someone died: Yes

fallen for a friend: Yes

DO I BELIEVE IN?

yourself: Well someone has to, so might as well be me!

miracles: I do. And if they aren’t true, at least the belief of their existence helps make their outcome possible

love at first sight: In some fairytale world maybe, but for me, nah

kiss on the first date: Possibly

angels: Yes. Of what way and form I think that’s for you to decide

OTHER

best friend’s name: I have a couple because there is too much life to only need one person in it! Lexi+Brittany+Mauricio+Imaya from all the way back to middle school and Ronan (a recent addition)

And even if we don’t talk every day of our lives I know they’ll always be there for me when I need them. Good or bad. And they know I would do the same. That’s all that really matters in the end. They’re my little chosen family

(oh that got a bit sappy, okay moving on)

eye color: Light blue? Blue? I dunno, people say it’s pretty so I go with it

fave movie: Don’t really have one...

favorite actor: Yeah... same with movies, don’t have one of those either

extrovert or introvert: I like to call myself an introverted extrovert

favorite flower: white peonies 

favorite hello kitty character? I wasn’t aware there were characters aside from hello kitty....

oof this is a long post, but very fun to do! Hopefully y’all haven’t done this yet but if so well I’m gonna tag you anyways @i-h8-u-no-u-dont @pansexualpandion @rvmengf @egglorru @it-has-the-gay-fanfiction and really @ anyone who wants to do this! I’d love to see your versions!!

[insanityclause]

I can't believe some people are getting angry at Tom over his dog. Because he's shared the dogs name in casual conversation but not with a blatant fan who's paid to meet him? Sorry, is he not allowed to talk to people at the park or tube like a normal person? People saying"well he told us the dogs name" no, he told people in everyday conversation. Whatever he does some fans call him a hypocrite.

Thanks to the dog anon for clearing up some things.  Makes sense that Tom wasn't so forthcoming with answering questions about Bobby in Chicago when he knows the fan knows Bobby's name already.  As the anon said, that's disingenuous.  Also, great reasoning for why Tom would be fine talking about Bobby to strangers he meets versus confirming info to fans that they would have only known through online gossip or pap pics.  The first one is his choice, the second one isn't.      

O lord dam if he does dam if he doesn’t. I’m hoping he doesn’t post pictures of his dog. It was cute with CE in the beginning but then it was like yeah ok.  I’m not so bothered with Tom not using his SM bc when does surprise us it’s like all my Christmas’s have come at once. Will probably get more once he’s back at work.

I think Tom is a naturally friendly person but also wary of fans and media spreading things. I'm not surprised the two things conflict and seem "hypocritical" - it must be difficult enough from his POV to be able to act like a normal person but also keep aware of things going too far. I mostly feel bad for him, not angry and offended like a baby.  

His dog's name is all over internet only because he has talked about it with strangers and revealed the name to the random people - - - - > no, his dogs name is all over the Internet because that woman stalked him, acted friendly, then chose to publicise the info. Arguably he could be "more careful" but you can't blame him for being polite and sociable in a non-fan environment. Honestly, I think some of this anger is because it puts the spotlight on us fans doing things he's not 100% okay with.

What did I completely miss here? Has Tom been rude or not wanting to talk about bobby, like what is all this about and I can’t seem to find the original source on your blog?!    

First of: where’s that story where someone said he showed her pictures of himself and bobby from his phone? And second: Tom is not being weird for not wanting to talk about his dog. He was the same way about TS. He want to keep it private but he also has said before that he lives his life like any other person, and just hopefully people respect his privacy. Which they don’t, and then I can understand why he would be a little off. If he even was.

Thanks to the anon who explained the conversation. I didn't feel personally insulted, I felt like he blames his fans and I do find that act wrong. It is my opinion. I became his fan after Ragnarok and it is weird what he has done before (2017) and what he is doing right now. Of course people will say it is because of "only" fans and media again but I don't feel in that way.

Why are people so obsessed with Tom's dog and his take on the whole matter is beyond me. But I'm the weird one, I guess. I don't obsess over my faves private life. I think, once again, this attitude is what makes him retreat and not share anything anymore. One more thing, are you going to leave tumblr or will you use both blogs? Thanks.  

About Tom not sharing things or talking to strangers about some things and not doing the same with fans in context like the cons, it's not lack of consistency imo, it's where this stalkerish attitude many fans show has lead him (using the dog as a deflection for the new album made me roll my eyes). I would act exactly the same. We are having what we deserve, given how we treated him.  

OK, last (second-last) dog post - and these are the comments from all sides, I think.

The story was an IG post after the BFI event, where an (apparent) Swifty was talking about how she had a long chat with him and he showed her pics on the phone.

And yes, I agree it’s absolutely different talking to a random person in the park (who may or may not be a slight fan), and giving info at a con, where there are thousands of people lined up, who will all want the same thing. Again, I mentioned the interview from 2016 where one guy wanted a selfie, and he said he couldn’t just take one, as there was a whole lineup of people there he’d said no to. It’s kind of an extension of that - 1 or 2 people at an event is different from tons in a time-constrained lineup. Hope that makes sense. It would also seem incredibly rude if he refused to talk to a person in the park/on the tube, etc.

And I will probably be using both - I’m still working on getting the other set up to my satisfaction (which will be never, but whatever).

[creativeloveletter]

about | the many faces of me

“this is me!” -greatest showman. bearded lady = me at my best.

who is this weird person behind this blog, you may ask? well, here ya go...

me on an everyday

“...she looks like ‘90s r&b...”

poor self-photoshopping into the dream scenarios in my head? MOAR PLZ

(PS raise your hand if you miss StarShotz! And then tell me your fav poses / props / backdrops because... we NEED to bring this back.)

grown woman me

i also have several “grown woman” lewks if you want to learn about my pro-fe-shu-nal veneer. here are some of my faves:

business page bio (scroll down on page)

linkedin

photoshoot

loved creative directing this for Come Alive Co. More on that, later. 

but if there’s anything these past few covid years taught me, it’s that... 

i am MORE than the work i produce for my creative clients. 

and if there’s anything the reckoning with race come 2020 + my own longtime-coming-identity-breakdown amid burnout taught me, it’s this: 

we don’t have time or energy to waste not reveling in the fruits of being our FULLEST selves. 

so, this is why i’ve started this tumblr. to peeel back the professionalism of “blogging” for sport (money. hits. the ripe rewards for a us enneagram 3′s / trauma-healing adults), and share the things i used to love posting on facebook, and IG before both came a selling battleground.

“this... is... Instagram!!!”

if you’re also burnt out from the battleground that is social turned selling media...

well, i’m so glad you’re here :)

[surveysonfleek]

1168.

Do you know a James? yup.

Have you ever been to Australia? If not, would you like to? i live there.

Have you ever been diagnosed with a mental illness? not officially. 

If you had to choose to have a different accent than the one you have now, what accent would you choose and why? happy with mine tbh. i find all accents interesting though.

New York or California? california. i loved new york but i could imagine living in cali more.

Have you ever or do you currently live in a Gated Community? no.

Who was your last text from? my boyfriend.

Do you know how to use a DSLR camera? yes.

If you had to choose one instrument to perfect, what instrument would you choose? piano. i’d love to learn guitar too but it means short nails foreverrrr.

Have you ever owned an Axolotl? no, they freaked me out as a kid.

What has been the longest amount of time you’ve spent on a plane? 12-13 hours i believe.

How often do you use Snapchat? i check it everyday but i don’t post on it everyday.

What does your last text say? 'yes’.

Have you ever played Habbo? yes.

What about Runescape? nope.

Have you ever heard of the band Mumford & Sons? If yes, do you like their music? yes. i think i’ve only heard one song by them.

Have you ever kissed anyone starting with the letter A, C, N, T or K? no.

Have you ever used Valium before? yes.

What time is it where you’re from? 1:58am.

Have you ever adopted an animal from an animal shelter? no.

Where do you usually find Surveys from? through the survey tag.

Australia or New Zealand? australia, duh. but i’d love to see nz!

Have you ever missed a flight? yes. reception at our hotel told us we only needed to get to the airport an hour before our flight even though we woke up super early. by the time we got to the airport our gate was closed. so angry. never again!

What is your best friend’s middle name? he has two lol.

How do you feel about the passing of Aretha Franklin? whoa, recent survey! i feel pretty sad, we definitely lost one of the greats. there’s no one like her out there right now.

Did you enjoy any of her music? yes.

What is your favourite film from your childhood? aladdin.

Kanye West or Drake? haha... i listen to drake more.

Do you know anyone who is named after a state? nope.

What was the reason for your previous doctor’s visit? i had these weird rashes on my face.

Have you ever been to an outdoor cinema? yes.

Have you ever had a “bad trip”? If yes, what happened? nothing i couldn’t handle. the worst was when i drank too much and smoked weed. i didn’t exactly trip but i vomited my guts out, had the biggest headache and had to coach myself to go to sleep.

How often do you use Instagram? everyday.

Have you ever smoked a cigarette? yes.

If so, do you still smoke? yes.

What are you up to tomorrow? hanging out with my dad and hopefully try and fix my car. then i have a hens night.

What type of questions do you like being asked during a survey? nothing too simple nor too deep.

Adam Sandler or Jim Carrey? adam sandler.

What is your favourite Ben Stiller movie? meet the parents is still a fave.

What is your favourite Spotify playlist if you have one? i use apple music.

Firefox or Chrome? chrome.

Do you enjoy learning about conspiracy theories? sure.

If so, what is your favourite? none that i truly stand by. i just like reading them.

Do you find hand tattoos attractive on your preferred sex? no.

If you had a baby boy, what would you name him? no idea yet, i only have a girl’s name planned out.

What is your favourite Netflix original series? oitnb, stranger things, unbreakable. there’s honestly a ton more that i can’t remember right now.

Have you ever owned a Tamagotchi? yes.

Do you have a favourite “survey blog” on Tumblr? If so, who? not really. i like most of them. especially the nice formatted ones haha.

Would you rather be 10 minutes late or 20 minutes early? 20 minutes early.

If you could be a member of any TV-Sitcom family, which would it be? fresh prince.

Tell me about the 6th person in your contact list: totally not checking.

Are you waiting for a text back right now? no.

Would you rather be able to control fire or water? fire.

[piahautea]

Appreciation Post: My Lovely Barkada

I’ve always been the stick-to-one type of friend.

Back during the first two years of junior high, you’d only see me with just one friend. One lunch buddy, one fair week constant, one automatic partner, one let’s-go-to-the-library-during-intrams-instead co-lazy bum, one companion and one everything. But never really the more meaningful ones like: a confidante, a tell-me-your-secrets-they’re-safe-with-me type of chill, a laughing comrade or a wingman /pagdating sa mga crushes na iyan/. That was until I met each of the cartoon people above. 

This post is dedicated to them. The not-so-small barkada I never thought I’d have. They've also been so supportive of my blogging ever since and I want y’all to meet them! Somehow you may also try to see a part of yourself in them with their little intro’s /but that's only if you want to/.

A little disclaimer by the way: Their art banners are filled with silly deets about them while their actual descriptions are a lot graver; although, it's still sounding a lot like silly Pea wrote them, aye. 

This is Leila. Leila’s been one of my best friends since 10th grade. I never thought we’d be in the friendship situation we have now because I only thought surface-level bros were all we'd ever be. But, nah. What are those for anyway? She was the quietly-acing-my-way-in-the-honor-rolls type. And, well, I was trying so hard to be that student. But we just randomly sparked up a convo about my blog and her love for Niall Horan and then she became my confidante in an instant with her shipping me so hard with a Tumblr boy that I used to like. In the things I thought highly impossible for myself, she believed I could turn them around in my favor and she stood there behind me with her hand on my back. She’s the best. I still wish she'd become a doctor, even though she's already faced towards a different track.

This is Margaux. When she spots you and you tickle her fancy, she’d probably talk to you. Basically, that's what happened to us. We were just batchmates in the same baking class. That changed when we bumped into each other at a charm store; she saw me first, tapped my back and said, “Hi!” like it’s nothing. Post the little meeting and the year after, we became classmates. And then I knew that smiling was her best asset and her laughter was her best type of music. She’d made me cookies and a chocolate-mint birthday cake for my 18th because that’s her. You hear little words and phrases like pastries, being top-level artsy, beauty queen pageants, genuine grins, dressing up for fun and you got it. That’s still gonna be her.

This is Froilan. If you know me well enough, you’d know that this dude’s been one of my constants since the beginning of time /‘di naman haha since 9th grade lang siguro/. You'll see him almost everywhere I go and part of almost everything I do. We’ve also been constantly teased by past classmates about us having that chemistry and that maybe we were already secretly a couple. All I can say is, nope. We’re merely bros. I love him, though. In the gayest way possible. He’s amazing in general. He loves getting and slaying the D so much. Drawing, dancing and designing *wink wink*. I’m never afraid to be myself when I’m with him and for that I’m eternally thankful. He’s also my punching bag hehe he enjoys the force of my knuckles kissing and smashing his fudge brownie skin /poetic/.

This is Nesli. She’s the first friend I’ve ever made in our circle. We’ve been together since the 7th grade and mutually sworn to be each other’s best friends during 8th grade. She’s also one of my confidantes. And the one who’s literally seen me in the good, the bad & the ugly and has still loved me no matter what. She has a heart large enough to fit in giraffes, all her favorite Filipino & European dishes, historical fiction books, her family, her art, her hoes and all her other friends. She’s my happy pill, tbfh. She’s going to make it big in the animations field or in any other field because she’s that flexible. She can write, draw, paint /in both the common mediums/, care for wildlife and humanity vividly. It's such a cakewalk to believe in what she's capable of because when she dreams, she dreams with her eyes open and with stellar passion running freely in her veins.

This is Brian. He’s one of my sister’s former tutees. I’ve heard stuff about him being sassy and loud /which he was/, but our friendship was a bit like of a plot twist. An unexpected thing. Although believe me when I say this: my sister predicted that we’d be the best of friends in the future. And she was right about it. 9th grade and I can still fondly remember it all. We’d sit in a corner where people weren't around to sing Defying Gravity because it was his fave and I was his fave duet partner, too. Sooner or later, we begun that singing routine. He easily became the person I’d always wanna sing with and now he’s worked his way to get into theater by switching schools for both SHS and college. I love my theater geek friend /who apparently knows how to get wasted now/. And I miss having to deal with him and his antics everyday. 

This is Gia. Being friends with her was also an unexpected one. She’s quiet and was only the closest to Cather /you’ll get know her later/. We’d never really had those talk-talks until the final years of junior high. She lent me her copy of To Kill A Mockingbird and it opened me to widen my reading choices. We also discovered each others’ love for indie/alternative rock music. She loves Nirvana, blink-182 and The Killers and it killed me. I’d also boast to those who love her brother’s band from the indie OPM scene that I’m friends with the vocalist’s baby sister because Hello? it’s not everyday you get to be friends with someone who has blood thick and rich of musical notes and art. She's an epitome of those two things.

This is Mika. Mika was Froilan’s friend first. And then she randomly talked to me in class and we became instant friends who loved hugging each other. She’s the type to get crafty and make you keychains or little drawings of your favorite things for Christmas or your birthday. She’s the sweetest soul and she likes to share stories with you; it doesn’t matter how long you’ll chatter with her. She’s also super smart! She helps me with all the Math help I needed back when we still had to take Math. You would just never see an honor roll without her in it. And yes, she had a phase with Big Time Rush back in junior high. But now, it seems like she’s also been bitten by another Kpopper /probably a friend from outside the circle/. She's the kind of treasure I'd like to keep with me anywhere I go. 

This is Carmela. This one’s another plot twist kind of friendship. Like Margaux, she’s also extremely loud and friendly. Like randomly-popping-into-your-face kind of friendly. She’s chatty but it’s a reasonable kind of chatter. She also dances like a pro. I envy her grace on the floor and the flat stomach she'd cultivated out of that. We may not have the same amount of time as we had before but we see to it that no matter how busy we are, we’d never fail to exchange short stories and warm hugs when we see each other. Also, yes, she is my co-bully when it comes to Froilan. Everything she does to put him in artless misery cracks me up every time /that’s how we roll/.

This is Seline. I’ve only known her this year but since then, she’s already been one of my closest friends in class. We just vibe well and we could talk about anything in the pop culture spectrum or just anything Tumblr and art-related. I love how her mind just works like a charm and concocts puns real quick. I love how she'd update me and tell me stories about her dogs and their newborn puppies because we share the same love for these critters and it just makes me giddy every time. Because of her, I’m starting to rethink my stances on animated films /because I’m not big on those/. She makes some of the greatest digital artworks I’ve ever seen and I can’t wait to have more cafe adventures with her and our other amigos and to visit her in Benilde by the time we reach college. 

This is Cather(ine). Like Nesli, we’ve been friends since 7th grade and best girls since the 8th. She’s the cutest /next to my spot/ in the group and makes equally-adorable reactions to everything she sees. It kind of takes her a while to do almost everything she has to do but it adds up to how she handles anything with the utmost love and care not anyone would ever spare time for. She's also loud whenever she opens her mouth to speak /e.g. when we're in the car and it's quiet, she would completely ignore the silence and start a quickfire with her words but that's okay because she can never be irritating to me at all/. I love her that much. I hope she’d find solace in the fact that she’s a bright, bright kiddo who would slay any scientific fate she’d choose. I’d always have her back as she's always had mine.

When we met, it suddenly just made sense to meet altogether, too. It wasn't like our personalities were so similar with the other that we just had to gather around a campfire and talk about starting a tribe or something. Our personalities differ; but in such a way that we complement each other, filling gaps that needed a little something of this or that. But about the tribe thing, yes we do gather. Annually. For Christmas. And it has to be in a different house each year until we get to be in everyone's humble abodes.

Ladies & gents, this is my second ohana. My very own battle cohort. Top 1 in my small list of kada’s. My most favorite non-blood related people in the universe. I used to be a stick-to-one kind of person. Now, I'm mostly a stick-to-ten.