#i put .2 thoughts into offering that as an option for people to order but the pricing would be OBSCENE

[loudstan]

(67) Days of Whatever the Fuck that Was (PART 2.)

Summary: Chenle wasn't interested in committed relationships until he met the one. The problem is that now she is the one who doesn't want to commit to him.

Pairing: Werewolf! Chenle x Siren! Female reader

Warnings: OOff where do I start. Things get dubious, and even a bit non-conish sometimes so do not read if that's not something you're into. A lot of mind games, manipulation, gaslighting, and all the red flags you can think of. Y/N is MEAN. Also, this is super long so i had to make two separate posts. Read both if you want to know how it started! SMUT.

(PART 2)

“Why’s Jisung crying?” Kun asked when he saw the youngest member of the pack trying to hide how glossy his eyes were a few days later.

“I’m not,” Jisung replied stubbornly, but the words came out broken.

“He watched (500) Days of Summer,” Renjun deadpanned. 

“You watched–,” Kun burst out laughing. “It’s a romantic comedy! How did you end up crying?”

“It’s not romantic, nor funny,” Jisung disagreed.

Renjun sighed. “He’s worried about Chenle.”

“Oh…” Kun frowned. “Is he still hiding in his room?”

Renjun and Jisung nodded.

Kun sighed and hesitantly walked to Chenle’s room, knocking on the door and letting himself in when he heard a monotonous ‘come in’ from the other side.

“Hey, Lele…,” he greeted awkwardly. “How are you feeling?”

Chenle was sprawling in bed, with dark circles under a pair of eyes stuck to the laptop screen.

“Hm,” he replied, without elaborating.

“What are you up to?” Kun asked casually, walking closer to take a look at the screen. “Oh…You’re watching that movie too…”

Chenle barely nodded. “I’ve watched it  6 times. Each time it becomes more obvious that they would never end up together. Funny, isn’t it?” his dull voice said.

“Lele, I’m so sorry,” Kun said sincerely. Not only for what happened to the younger werewolf,  but also for even mentioning that stupid movie.

“It was gonna happen sooner or later,” Chenle closed his laptop and finally looked at the oldest. “She didn’t want me. Not the way I want her, at least.”

Kun looked at him sadly.

“Maybe I could make my own movie,” Chenle joked unenthusiastically. “The title would be (67) Days of Whatever the Fuck that Was.”

“Is there anything I can do to help?” the older offered.

“Sure, you could convince her to take me back,” Chenle chuckled humorlessly. “Forget it, gege. There’s nothing anyone could do,” he said, before putting his laptop away and pulling the covers all the way up until they covered his head. “Can you close the door when you leave, please?”

“I…sure,” Kun murmured, walking out and closing the door quietly.  He stood in the corridor for an entire minute as he considered his options. “Fuck it,” he murmured, for once not caring about his manners.

He went back to the living room where Jisung and Renjun were waiting expectantly. “Get up, you two,” Kun told them. “We’re going to the bar.”

“Yeosang, I’m fine,” you insisted after he begged you to go rest for the 5th time.

“ You haven’t seen your mate in a week, and you know that can affect your health. You shouldn’t abuse your body.”

“It’s almost time to close. There are like 5 people here. It can’t be that hard, ” you laughed.

“I can handle it for the last half of an hour,” he offered. “You haven’t been looking too good lately–”

“It’s getting better,” you lied before turning to the customer to take his order. “Hi! What can I get you?”

“Three glasses of Eternal Dusk, please,” a handsome man with a charming smile said, handing you his credit card. 

“Right away,” you replied with a smile, scanning the card and handing it back to him before preparing the drinks skillfully and handing them to him.

 He thanked you and took the drinks to the table where his friends were waiting for him. You thought you recognized one of them, but he quickly looked away, suddenly being very interested in the wall behind him. Over the course of the night, they kept stealing glances at you, quickly looking away and talking secretly in their tiny group. Eventually, the same guy who had ordered the drinks earlier approached the bar again.

“Another round?” you offered.

“Uh, actually–” he stopped mid-sentence with a wince and hesitantly grabbed a pendant that was hanging from a chain, tucked under his shirt. He inspected the relic suspiciously like it wasn’t his own.

“Everything okay?” you asked.

He looked at you and then back at the pendant, which he quickly hid back under his shirt. “Y-yeah sorry,” he smiled politely. “I was wondering–... you’re not from around here, are you?”

“No, I–uh, I’m from the Scarlet Islands,” you disclosed. “Why?”

“Figures. Your beauty is…definitely not something you see in this town,” he said cheekily, looking at you like he had found out your biggest secret.

“Are you going to order something or not?” Yeosang interrupted the conversation, standing in between you and the customer. 

The man smiled at Yeosang before shaking his head and waving goodbye. “I think we’re done for tonight,” he said, going to his table and hurrying his friends out of the bar.

“What a creep,” Yeosang said. 

“Y-yeah,” you chuckled nervously and started cleaning up now that the last customers were gone.

“Heeey, Sangie,” Wooyoung greeted cheerfully approaching the bar. “Can I steal Y/N away for a little bit?”

Yeosang glared at Wooyoung suspiciously. 

“It won’t be anything stupid, I promise,” Wooyung said, trying to look as innocent as possible.

“I’ll be okay, Sangie,” you chuckled, walking away with Wooyoung when Yeosang finally nodded hesitantly.

Wooyoung guided you out of the ship, to the dock that connected it to land. It was late at night and the place was deserted. The only sound you could hear was the water splashing the wooden ship and the distant voices of the crew members coming from inside the ship.

When you looked at Wooyoung you were surprised to see him taking his shirt off.

“What are you doing?” you asked, astonished.

“I’m getting undressed,” he said, unbuckling his belt.

“I can see that. Why?”

“We’re going swimming!” he exclaimed, stepping out of his pants to present himself in front of you in his underwear. “Why are you just standing there? Do you need me to take your clothes off for you?” he asked suggestively.

“Woo, it’s late…” you tried to reason.

“I’ll push you. Don’t test me.”

You saw a mischievous glint in his eyes and you couldn’t help but laugh. “Fine, I guess it won’t hurt to swim a little bit,” you said, undressing yourself until you were only wearing your bra and panties. The crew had seen you in a swimming suit before, so this was basically the same. And it was dark, so you weren’t worried about him seeing through the fabric once it got wet

You followed Wooyoung into the water and sighed at the feeling surrounding you.

“Feel good?” Wooyoung asked, apprehensively.

“Really good,” you admitted, surprised. Your body had felt heavy and ached for the last few days, but you were suddenly feeling so relieved.

“Seawater restores sirens’ vitality,” Wooyoung commented, very proud of himself. “I read about it.”

“Aaw, were you worried about me?” you teased.

He splashed water on your face as a response. You gasped and splashed him back, starting a childish battle that ended with him holding you tightly against his own body to prevent your attacks.

You were laughing brightly when you felt the soft presence of his lips on yours. It barely lasted a second, but it made all laughter stop.

Your confused eyes met Wooyoung’s untamed ones. He wasn’t laughing, nor did he seem embarrassed or regretful.

“Did that feel good too?” he asked. His voice was thick with implication.

You stared back at him, speechless.

“Don’t worry, this isn’t a love confession,” he said, gently pushing a strand of wet hair from your face. “This is just me saying that I know you’re going through a hard time, and that your body isn’t taking it well. You’re tired, in pain, and so sensitive…” he trailed off.

You blushed. “Woo–”

“I know it’s someone else that you want,” he continued. “But I can help you forget, even if it’s just for a little bit.”

“You don’t have to–”

“You think I get nothing out of it? You may not know this but I have a thing for sirens. I dated one, actually…but things didn’t end up well. I recently found out through Yeosang that she met someone knew,” he chuckled but his laugh sounded empty, hurt. “I should be happy for her. But I can’t bring myself to. Childish, huh?”

“It was you?!” you asked, astonished. “The friend Yeosang told me about–”

“She’s my ex,” Wooyoung confessed. “Well…if you could call that a relationship. We barely held hands or kissed. She was afraid if we…consummated, she would follow me wherever I went. That was smart of her; following a pirate around isn’t anyone’s dream life.”

“Woo…I’m so sorry,” you whispered sympathetically.

“You’re in no position to be sorry about someone else’s love life,” he laughed, earning a playful punch on the shoulder. “What I’m trying to say here is that none of us is with who we want to be, but we have each other…”

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea…” you hesitated.

“Isn’t it tiring to have to pleasure yourself?” he taunted, caressing your waist with intent and making you shiver, suddenly very aware of the proximity and nakedness of you both. “You can’t let the man you love make you cum, and I couldn’t make the woman I loved cum…” he murmured, moving his hands skillfully to give you goosebumps. “Wouldn’t it be poetic if we cum together?”

“The mental gymnastics to get to that conclusion are out of this world,” you joked.

“Y/N,” he groaned. “We’re both lonely and horny, and we’re stuck in a lifestyle that won’t let us have a stable relationship with anyone outside this damn ship. Is it really that crazy to propose we help each other out?”

You considered it for a second. He was making sense; you couldn’t be with Chenle if you wanted to continue your current lifestyle…but Wooyoung would always be there. 

“Captain said no relationships within crew members,” you murmured, holding onto the last argument against this reckless idea.

“Captain doesn’t need to know,” he assured you, closing the distance between your lips and kissing you. You kissed him back, focusing on Wooyoung and trying to forget all about Chenle. Without knowing that you would see him sooner than expected.

“CHENLE!” Kun yelled, bursting into the depressed wolf’s room and yanking the covers away from his limp body. “YOU STUPID BOY!”

After getting over the initial shock, Chenle gave him an unamused glare. “We already established that. No need to yell,” he murmured, reaching for the cover again.

Kun took the cover from his hand and threw it on the floor. He then unclasped from around his neck a golden chain with a doubloon hanging from it and waved it in front of Chenle’s face. “Do you know what this is?” 

“No,” deadpanned Chenle.

“It’s a siren detector,” he replied proudly.

“Why do you even have one of those?” Chenle asked, still uninterested.

“I got it from my time in the navy, of course. All sailors get one for safety.”

“Pff, you were not in the navy,” Chenle scoffed.

“Yes, I was? I sent you postcards?” Kun reminded him offendedly. “Whatever, that’s not the point. The point is we went to the bar where your mate works—“

“You did WHAT?!” Chenle asked outrageously. 

“We were going to convince her to take you back,” Kun continued.

“Nooo,” Chenle groaned, mortified. “How did you even know which bar it was?”

“Jisung led the way,” Kun informed.

Chenle glared at Jisung who was standing awkwardly next to Renjun.

“Sorry,” Jisung mumbled. “Didn’t want you to be sad…”

Chenle sighed. “You should have asked me— did you steal that glass?”

Jisung looked at the glass he was holding, still half full of alcohol. “We left in a hurry and I kinda panicked.”

“As I was saying,” Kun demanded everyone’s attention. “Whenever I got near your mate the detector started burning my skin. I asked her where she was from and she named an island that is located in the Forbidden Sea, which is where you can find  the biggest population of merpeople.”

Chenle stared at him dumbly.

“You imprinted on a siren!” Kun exclaimed exasperatedly. “Well, probably a half-siren…she seems to be able to spend long periods of time on land.”

“…That’s ridiculous. I would have noticed if my mate had a fishtail.”

“I guess they don’t teach you guys anatomy in school anymore,” Kun said. “That’s a myth. Sirens look like any other human. Some historical jerk assumed they had tails because the lower part of their bodies often remained hidden under the water. They have legs just like us, and they sometimes come to land, but they need sea water to survive. My guess is Y/N gets easy access to the water by traveling with pirates.”

“But… it can’t be…”

“It makes perfect sense,” Renjun interjected. “Sirens are famous for their mind control. Think about it: isn’t it weird that you always agreed to everything she said?”

Again, Chenle glared at Jisung, who must have spilled the beans about that too.

 “I don’t know, man,” he sighed tiredly. “Maybe I’m just a simp.”

“No but—“ Jisung spoke nervously. “That night when you met her you were so out of it. All you kept saying was that you didn’t want to mark her. Isn’t that weird?”

Chenke knitted his brows. It was kind of weird. “Maybe it was the fever.”

“Just try to remember,” Renjun insisted. “Did you ever have any disagreement that ended with you saying something out of character? Something that you didn’t understand why you were saying?”

Chenle froze. Every encounter with you had ended like that. Suddenly it all made sense.

Holy fuck. He had been played.

 He groaned and pulled his hair. “So Y/N is a master manipulator. Why does it matter? She doesn’t want to see me.”

”That’s the weird part,” Kun says hurriedly. “I heard her speaking with the other bartender, saying something about not seeing her mate for a week. Your relationship,” he said that word making air quotes with his hands, “ended a week ago. So that has to be referring to you, right? That means she imprinted on you too. But if that’s really the case then she wouldn’t be able to stand being away from you after you guys slept together,” he ranted nonsensically. 

Chenle wasn’t really following. He was still trying to process that he imprinted on a siren, and now Kun was saying that you probably imprinted on him too. He didn’t even know sirens imprinted.

“Maybe sexual relationships aren’t that important for her,” Renjun said, trying to make sense of the situation. 

“Sex is a sacred ritual between siren mates,” Kun contradicted Renjun’s theory. “When a siren is brought to their climax by the one they imprinted on it’s game over. The bond is sealed for eternity. Seriously, guys, what are they teaching you in school?”

“Not how to mate with sirens, clearly,” Renjun replied sarcastically, making Jisung choke on his drink.

“Orgasms seal the bond…” Chenle mumbled, sitting up as he pieced together everything he heard. “Game over…”

“Exactly,” Kun said, excited that at least one of them was paying attention and learning from him. “But then she probably wasn’t talking about you when she mentioned a mate because she shouldn’t be able to live without you after two months of–” 

“I didn’t make her cum,” Chenle admitted.

The room was silent.

“You mean– last time you were together?” Renjun offered.

“Ever,” Chenle deadpanned.

Jisung gasped. “You never told me that!” he accused.

“Yeah, thank god, or you would have told everyone!” Chenle rolled his eyes.

“I get nervous when interrogated!” Jisung defended himself.

“Chenle!” Kun shrieked. “Are you saying that in two months of being fuckbuddies,” he stressed, “ you didn’t make her cum once?!”

“It wasn’t my fault!” Chenle replied.

“Right,” Renjun said sarcastically.

“She kept telling me that I wasn’t good enough. That I didn’t deserve to touch her!” Chenle huffed, incredulous at what he was learning. “Whenever she was about to cum she would stop me with that sickeningly sweet voice of hers–”

“The siren voice,” Kun nodded, starting to understand what was happening.

“And I would always end up doing as she said and–I don’t know I thought it was like a weird kink of hers, or that I really was that bad in bed,” Chenle groaned. 

“She was stopping you from consummating the bond,” Renjun breathed out, catching up.

“Wait what?” Jisung asked.

“She imprinted on Chenle and she knew if he made her orgasm  she would be bonding with him forever,” Kun explained. “She literally hypnotized him to make sure he never made her cum.”

“That’s a whole new level of commitment issues…” Jisung said incredulously. “And gaslighting,” he added,  not believing that someone would go that far. 

But Chenle didn’t doubt you would do all that and more to get what you wanted. You were literally insane.  

“Fucking bitch,” he grunted, getting out of bed and exiting the room.

“Where are you going?” Jisung asked.

“Where do you think?!” Chenle yelled back.

“That’s a terrible idea,” Renjun warned, running after him, followed by Jisung and Kun.

“You either wait here or you come with, but you’re not stopping me,” Chenle grunted, opening the front door and walking out of the house in his pajamas.

The three werewolves exchanged worried looks before following Chenle to his car. Kun ended up driving because Chenle’s hands were shaking with rage, and the car was barely parked near the port when Chenle sprinted toward the imposing ship. 

The bar was closed, and everyone was probably asleep, but Chenle didn’t give a damn. He was going to wake up the entire town if he had to.

But he didn’t have to, because he heard you.

It was distant and weak. You were giggling and whimpering, and at some point, he even thought he heard his name. But where–?

He almost tripped when he stepped on…pants? And there were other pieces of clothing too– Was that your top?!

“You okay?” asked an unfamiliar male voice.

“F-fine,” you croaked.

“That good, huh?” the stranger asked.

“Shut up,” you replied playfully.

The voices were getting closer and Chenle’s enhanced vision could see you swimming toward the dock…with a man. 

“It must have been good,” the man insisted. “You were so out of it that you called me a totally different name.”

“Woo,” you whined, ashamed. “I’m sorry–” 

He pecked your lips. “It’s fine,” he assured you with a smile, reaching for the wooden surface. “You’ll get it right next time–,” his sentence was interrupted when out of nowhere someone grabbed him and pulled him out of the water aggressively. 

Your eyes widened in fear when you saw Chenle, manhandling Wooyoung with murderous intent. The pirate landed on his back on the dock with a loud thud and winced, but that was only the beginning of the pain Chenle had planned for him. 

“C-chenle!” you shrieked, getting out of the water. “Chenle, stop!”

“I’ll deal with you later,” he growled at you, getting back to beating the shit out of the man who had dared to kiss you.

Desperately, you yelled at him to stop, tried to pull him away from Wooyoung, and finally screamed for help, hoping at least one of your crew members would hear you.

Luckily, Yunho came running out of the ship, closely followed by Mingi, who looked half-asleep. They quickly assessed the situation and charged in to separate the two men. San and Yeosang joined the scene right after, helping Wooyoung get up and trying to get him away from the threat.

“I’ll teach you not to touch what isn’t yours,” Chenle growled, breaking free from Yunho and Mingi’s grasp, but thankfully Kun, Renjun and a terrified Jisung stepped in, not letting him reach the poor man. 

“Leave right now or I’ll call the police,” Seongwha spoke authoritatively, standing between his crew and the werewolves.

“Call the police then!” Chenle challenged petulantly. “See if I care. One of my pack is fucking a police officer so they can’t do shit to us–” he suddenly fell on the floor completely unconscious. Behind him, there was Jongho.

“I hit a pressure point so he’ll be asleep for a bit,” Jongho explained calmly. “Not for long though, so you should get him out of here fast.”

The three werewolves nodded quickly, and mumbled a thousand apologies while they grabbed his unconscious pack member and dragged him away. 

Seungwha quickly instructed the crew to take Wooyoung inside and tend to his wounds before turning to you. “Y/N, Captain wants to see you.”

The crew turned to look at you, failing to mask the fear in their eyes. They knew that if the Captain asked you to go to his cabin, it meant you were in huge trouble.

You lowered your head and nodded obediently, grabbing your clothes and boarding the ship. You quickly dried your body and put on some clothes before walking to the Captain’s cabin with trembling legs.

“Come in,” he said before you could even knock.

The antique door opened with a quiet squeak.

Captain Hongjoong was standing by a small window while playfully tossing his spyglass from one hand to the other.

“Did you ask to see me?” you asked nervously.

“I did,” he hummed calmly. “Had fun with Wooyoung?”

Your blood ran cold. There was no way he could have found out this fast, could he?

He chuckled. “Come here, Y/N.”

You took hesitant steps toward him until you were face to face.

“Look outside” he instructed,positioning so you were looking out the window. “What do you see?”

You saw the dock where the fight had happened and if you moved a bit to the right you could see the exact spot where you and Wooyoung had been fooling around. Could he have seen–?

“Saw it all,” he purred next to your ear, answering your unvoiced question. “Can’t say I’m surprised. If someone was going to break that rule it was Wooyoung.”

“It wasn’t his fault–”

“Please,” Hongjoong laughed, sitting on a chair made out of a barrel. “You want me to believe that Wooyoung wasn’t the one who started this? I know my crew,” he said, gesturing at the chair in front of him for you to take a seat too.

“He was only trying to help,” you explained, sitting down.

“Yeah, because you broke up with rich boy, right? Maybe if you hadn’t used your siren voice on him things wouldn’t have ended like that.”

You gasped in surprise. He knew about that?! 

He gasped too, mocking you. “Told you, Y/N. I know my crew,” he informed you, changing his tone to a more serious one. “Relationships within the crew are a rule that could be bent if necessary… but I strictly forbade you from bewitching people.”

“I–I know…”

“Wooyoung and you hooked up, alright, no problem. You’re both adults. But what you did to that man,” he said pointing at the window, “was take away his autonomy for your benefit.”

You nodded slowly, ashamed. 

“I’ve been waiting to see if you would solve things on your own, but now one of my men is hurt. You did that,” he accused.

You winced. “I understand. I’ll pack my things,” you said.

Hongjoong frowned.“Why would you do that?”

“I broke the rules and I put the crew in danger. So I gotta leave, right?”

“That would be the easy way out,” he said sternly. “You can’t abandon people whenever you fail them.”

“Then what should I do?”

“Apologize.”

“I’m sorry,” you said immediately.

“Not to me. To Chenle Zhong.”

Wow. He even knew his full name.

“I ended things with him,” you explained.

“But did you apologize?”

“He’ll move on and find someone better.”

“Did.you.apologize?”

You sighed in defeat. “...No.”

“Do it,” he commanded. “In person.”

You nodded right when someone knocked on the door softly.

“Come in,” Hongjoong said.

Seongwha walked in. “Wooyoung will be fine. Only a few bruises, but no broken bones.”

“Good,” Hongjoong sighed. “Tell him he’s grounded.”

“Of course,”  Seongwha said, but shot you a worried look. “What about Y/N?”

“She has her own task to complete, isn’t that right?” he said, looking at you solemnly.

And that’s how you found yourself unblocking Chenle and texting him, asking him if you could meet. The message showed as read for hours until he finally replied setting a time and date.

He picked you up like he often did in the past, before shit hit the fan. At first you refused to get in the car.

“I’ll be quick,” you said.

“I won’t,” he countered angrily. “I have a lot to say, and you’re gonna listen. Get in.”

His voice left no room for disobedience, so you nervously got in the car. This time he drove in a totally different direction. 

“Where are we going?” you asked.

He didn’t reply. He remained silent even when the car stopped in front of a huge modern building, taking you into the elevator and, once again, pressing the button to go to the highest floor. 

You were in awe when you entered a place as luxurious as the presidential suite, but more homelike. It was a spacious penthouse, with minimum decoration, like it had been recently purchased, with enormous windows that allowed you to see the ocean.

“I’m listening,” Chenle said dryly, standing in front of the window and watching the striking view.

You stood behind him, taking a deep breath in to brace yourself. “There’s something you must know,” you started saying.

He kept his eyes on the view, waiting for you to continue.

“I’m part siren. Sirens can control people’s minds with their voices…and I did that to you.”

He clenched his jaw but remained silent, 

“Everytime you came too close I made you believe that you didn’t actually want that. I treated you like shit to keep you under control, but the truth was that I was afraid of what would happen if we went further. I’m sorry,” you finally said. 

He turned around, glaring at you. “You’re sorry? Do you think you can use and humiliate someone repeatedly and then just say you’re sorry?”

You shook your head. “I know what I did was awful. That’s why I ended things; so you can forget about me and move on.”

“That’s your way of fixing things?” He laughed humorlessly. “Imagine someone broke your leg and then they put a fucking sticker on it, telling you to forget about it. Can you go run a marathon?”

“...That’s not the same–”

“That’s what it felt like to me,” he insisted. “You broke me every time you told me I didn’t deserve you. Everytime you made me say what we had wasn’t special. You don’t get to step on me like that and then tell me to move on.”

“I’m trying to do what’s right.”

“No. You’re doing what’s easier.” 

“Chenle I–,” you sighed. “I’m leaving in three days. There’s nothing I can do for you at this point.”

He met your gaze with eyes that reflected a storm of emotions. 

“There’s something,” he said firmly. “Kiss me.”

A shiver ran down your spine. There was nothing you would like more than to kiss him. “Wouldn’t that make things worse?” you asked apprehensive.

“The person I imprinted on used me for months and is leaving in 3 days. Things can’t possibly get worse for me,” Chenle deadpanned. He stared at your lips and took one of your hands tenderly. “Can you let me have just one moment with you that feels real? Without the lies and the mind games?”

You breathed out against his lips. “O-okay…”

Chenle’s lips were on yours, slow and hot. You felt like you were floating. It had been so long since the last time you were this close to him, you had forgotten how well his lips fit into yours, how gratifying his body felt against yours, how easily he could turn you on with his fingertips barely grazing your skin.

You couldn’t remember why you turned down his touch in the past when it was clearly what you needed the most–even the body ache you had woken up with was subsiding thanks to his ministrations.

It was the little moan that escaped you what brought you back to reality by the time he had taken your shirt off and was kissing your chest while playing with the strap of your bra.

“Chenle,” you moaned when he unclasped your bra and attached his lips to your tits. “I t-think we should stop now–”

He ignored your concerns, sucking on your nipple languidly. 

“Ooh– Chenle I’m serious,” you started to panic at how dangerously good you were starting to feel. With how sensitive you were since you imprinted on him and how much you had been craving for him it wouldn’t take long for you to climax…and that’s a luxury you couldn’t afford if you were to leave with the crew in a couple of days.

“Don’t be like that,” he cooed, unbuttoning your jeans. “You hardly ever allowed me to touch you during our encounters. You can’t expect me to be satisfied with just a kiss when this could be the last time I see you.”

“T-then how about I make y-you feel good instead?” you offered nervously, trying to pull his hands away from you, but he quickly slapped your hands away.

“I don’t think so. We did things your way many times already. It’s my turn to make you cum,” he declared, pulling your pants down hastily.

“NO! WAIT!” you shrieked, grabbing his hands with all your strength.

Chenle stared into your eyes intently. “There’s that terrified expression again,” he uttered. “It’s almost like you don’t want to cum. But that would be ridiculous, wouldn’t it?” he taunted. “Unless there’s something you aren’t telling me…”

You gulped.You indeed hadn’t told him you imprinted on him and what the consequences of an orgasm would be. “I…I just–That’s n-not why I came here–”

“What’s so terrifying about me making you cum, hmm?” he inquired darkly, like he already knew the answer, cornering you against the window glass. “If you don’t give me a good reason I won’t stop.”

You couldn’t tell him, because if you did then you were 100% sure he wouldn’t stop. You didn’t want to do this again, but you didn’t see any other way out right now.

“Pup, listen to me–” you spoke sweetly but he clasped his hand on your mouth firmly.

“No, you won’t,” he spoke through gritted teeth. “You apologize for bewitching me, but you try to do it again the second things don’t go as you planned?” he asked incredulously. 

You squirmed but he didn't budge.

Chenle hummed, placing his free hand on the front of your neck and tracing his fingers over your throat, drawing what felt like random figures. “What a shame. That was your last chance.” 

You gasped for air when he finally uncovered your mouth, but when you tried to speak again no words came out.

You cleared your throat and opened your mouth again, but even though you were saying words, they didn’t materialize into sounds.

You looked at Chenle in shock, and he smirked back at you.

“It’s not nice, huh? Not being able to say what you want,” he asked rhetorically.

‘What did you do?!’ you tried to ask, but of course once again nothing came out of your mouth. 

Chenle understood your voiceless question though and he chuckled. “Here goes my first confession: I found out about what you were a few days ago. I’ve been thinking of ways to stop you from using that voice on me since then. At first I thought about choking you, but I was so fucking mad at you I was afraid I would end up breaking your neck, so I learned how to cast this little spell on your vocal chords.”

Your eyes widened, remembering how you thought that he was just caressing your neck seconds ago.

“I also know you imprinted on me,” he continued speaking, caressing your face. “And I know what will happen if I make you cum so, naturally, I will make it happen.”

Your instinct kicked in and you pushed him, trying to get away as fast as you could, but he quickly caught you and turned you around, pushing you against the window glass with him hugging you from behind. You shivered when the cold material made contact with your bare chest, and the beautiful city view reminded you of how embarrassingly exposed you were.

Chenle’s hand had already found its way into your panties, and he was pleasuring you skillfully and fast, with only one objective in mind.

“Here goes my second confession: I regret not killing that friend of yours,” he whispered next to your ear, while two of his fingers were buried inside of you. “Can’t believe you let him have you like this before me. It drove me mad to find out what you sound like when you’re cumming while in another man’s arms. But what made me even more furious was that you moaned my name. How fucking shameless can you be?”

You wanted to dig a hole and hide in it forever, but first you needed to run away.

He clicked his tongue when you kicked your leg back aimlessly trying to get him off you. “You’re being so rude when I’m making you feel so good you’re dripping down my hand?” He asked, adding a third finger and making you tighten around him.

You shook your head and tried to look at him over your shoulder, giving him your best puppy eyes.

“Do you really want me to stop?” he asked, stilling his fingers inside of you.

You nodded promptly.

He sighed. “I guess I should respect your wishes just like you respected mine–Oh, right,” he pretended to suddenly remember something important. “You didn’t,” he concluded, fucking his fingers into you fast and hard.

You would have screamed if you could. You were so close and it was both marvelous and horrifying. If you gave in it would change your life forever, so you tried to even your breath and will yourself to think of something else.

“Would you look at that?” Chenle taunted. “I can see your ship from here…It’s a shame they’re too far to see how much of an obedient girl you’re being for me, taking my fingers so well, about to give yourself to me completely.”

You did not want anyone to see you like this, but you tried to remind yourself that this penthouse was on the highest floor in an exclusive neighborhood. Surely no one could see you.

“Mm…should I bite you before or after I get you off?” Chenle asked, placing a wet kiss on your neck.

You squirmed helplessly. At this point you knew you wouldn’t break free, and that your efforts were in vain, but you were too stubborn to accept your fate.

“I’m tired of waiting,” he said, abusing that spot that had you rolling your eyes while using his other hand to rub your clit roughly. “Give it to me now.”

Your ears rang and the city lights in front of you became blurry. You felt like the world was spinning around you while the tingly feeling that sometimes you experienced in your fingertips expanded through your body. 

‘Chenle, Chenle, Chenle’ was the only thought in your mind. His firm hands on your body, his warm respiration on your neck, his expensive cologne invading your nostrils, his luscious voice murmuring words you couldn’t comprehend right now–he was everywhere. The feeling was so overwhelming, unlike any orgasm any man had ever given you before. There was no way back now. You were–

“All mine,” Chenle chuckled, removing his hands from your underwear and placing one of them on your throat to remove the spell. “Was that really so bad?” he asked, turning you around to face him.

You glared at him. “Y-you–,” you coughed and spoke shakily, still riding the neverending aftershoks of your orgasm. “Do you k-know what you just d-did?!”

“I’m fully aware,” he replied nonchalantly.

“I won’t be able to leave, you asshole!” you yelled at him as tears started forming in your eyes. “You ruined my life!”

The hand that was on your neck squeezed your throat.

“Like I said, I know what I did. That’s why I did it,” he grunted. “And just for your information, I only reversed the spell to hear you moan. Not for you to get bratty and annoying, so if you try to bewitch me or yell at me one more time you won’t be speaking until the end of my rut.”

You paled. “Y-your rut?!” you choked out.

“Third confession,” Chenle whispered against your lips. “I chose this night to meet because my rut is scheduled to start anytime soon. And you’re gonna help me through it.”

You kicked his leg just out of pettiness. You knew it probably didn’t hurt much and it wouldn’t get you out of this predicament, but you didn’t know how else to voice your anger.

He gave you an unamused look. “That’s it,” he growled, lifting you in his arms and throwing you over his shoulder unceremoniously. You squirmed, kicked, and hit whatever part of him you could reach but it only seemed to add to the punishment that was coming. 

He opened the door to a bedroom, which was also surrounded by wide windows. Like the living room, it wasn’t fully furnished or decorated, but there was a king size bed in the middle and a nightstand, which was all that Chenle needed right now. 

He sat on the bed and manhandled you so you were lying on your belly on his lap, and before you had the chance to ask anything or complain you felt a sharp pain on your ass.

“You’re going to behave,” he guaranteed, landing another slap that made you gasp. “Even if I have to force you to.”

You tried to keep your mouth shut. If he had reversed the spell because he wanted to hear you moan then you wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of hearing a single sound from you.

After spanking you a couple more times he noticed what you were trying to pull.

“Really?” he asked, giving you a particularly hard smack that almost made you give in. “We’ll see about that,” he murmured.

He moved you onto the bed, removed your panties hastily and positioned you so your legs were hanging off the bed while still on your belly. You turned your head around suspiciously but you didn’t see him. You were going to sit up when you felt a pair of firm hands gripping your asscheeks and something warm and wet grazing your inner labia. 

You yelped and Chenle chuckled against your center before diving in.

It had been a long time since someone ate you out from behind; usually you were the one in charge, so being in such a compromising position was humiliating yet he was making you feel so good…

No. You couldn’t let him know you were enjoying this. You bit your lip and grasped onto the bed sheets desperately.

His tongue slid inside of you and he landed another slap on your ass, feeling you clench around the wet muscle. He pulled away for a second to say some cheeky comment, but a malicious kick almost landed on his face.

Furiously, he stood up and climbed on the bed, grabbing you as you were crawling away and forcing you to turn around to face him.

“What the fuck was that?” he growled. 

“Fuck you!” you hissed in response.

“Fucking brat,” he spat, unbuckling his belt and straddling you. “After all you’ve done you think you have the right to be angry?”

“Oh and you’re any better?” you asked indignantly. “You forced an orgasm out of me even though you knew what that implied–”

“Agreed,” he conceded, unbuttoning his pants. “We’re both terrible people and now we’re stuck together, so you might as well get used to it–”

“I may be bonded to you but you don’t own me! I’m sure Yeosang can help me find a way to undo this–Hhmp!” your ranting was interrupted by Chenle grabbing your jaw firmly and  shoving his cock in your mouth, absolutely not in the mood to listen anymore.

“Mm, yeah that’s better,” he hummed, thrusting the head of his cock in and out slowly. “Such a beautiful voice but all that comes out of your mouth is poisonous.”

You tried to complain, but the vibrations only pleased Chenle even more. 

“Yeah, go on, princess,” he encouraged you mockingly, sinking some more of his length into your mouth. 

You shot him a dirty look and hollowed your cheeks to give a hard suck, tasting the salty liquid that the tip oozed.

He moaned and his body bent in pleasure. “Oh yeah?” he sneered, pulling out slightly to thrust back in. “Do your worst, princess, fuck–”

“Hmm,” you moaned around him, stretching your lips and straining your neck to bob your head. 

Chenle felt like his head was spinning. You had pleasured him with your mouth before, but this was different. He had never had so much power over you. It made him feel euphoric. He placed his hands on your head to keep you in place, pulling your hair unintentionally. His mouth hung slack and he fucked your mouth rhythmically.

It took you choking when his cock hit the back of your throat for him to cum in your mouth with a guttural moan, trapping your head between his pelvis and the mattress until you drank every single drop.

With a jaded sigh, he climbed off your chest to start going lower, kissing every corner of your body on the way until he positioned himself with his face between your legs to continue what he had started.

You let out a broken moan when he captured your clit with his mouth and sucked insistently. 

Your legs kicked his back and you pulled his hair angrily but you couldn’t refrain from moaning, much to his delight.  He sucked, and sucked until the stimulation was painful, and almost wished he moved his mouth somewhere else but he was suctioning your clit with obsessive intent, wanting it to feel so good it hurt, wanting to break you.

He alternated between flattening his tongue against you while shaking his head and going back to harsh sucking until your stomach contorts and your mind goes blank, making your legs shake in pleasure.

…Except he doesn’t stop. 

It was the first time he had you cum in his mouth and now he was captivated. He wished you had let him do this sooner. How dare you keep this away from him all this time?! 

“Do it again,” he grumbled against your core  between sloppy licks.

“Are y-haa…are you insane?!” you whined, trying to push him away.

He looked up at you with reddened eyes and growled, slapping your inner thigh.

“I said,” he spoke roughly. “Do it again,” he commanded, getting back to work.

This time he was all over the place, licking and slurping every drop of your release and making you shriek in pleasure and embarrassment. He wouldn’t let any of it go to waste. This belonged to him. You belonged to him. And he would take it as many times as he wanted.

You trembled when he once again focused your clit, like it was his new favorite toy, and circled it with his tongue going clockwise and then counterclockwise, and then flicking it barely with the tip of his tongue.

You whined and the death grip you had on his hair to push him away ended up pushing his head closer to your center.

He moaned appreciatively and let you fuck his face until he heard you gasp brokenly, so he sucked hard, bringing you to yet another orgasm. 

Your body relaxed on the bed while he cleaned you up with his tongue languidly, making you wince and convulse sporadically. 

Once he finally licked all he could find, he climbed back up so he was face to face with you.

“I hate you,” you croaked.

“Yeah?” he purred, kissing you, letting you taste yourself on his lips. “I don’t think you do…And even if you did, that’s too bad, because I’m obsessed with you,” he concluded, diving in for another kiss.

He was right, you didn’t hate him. You were just mad, and scared, but you loved his lips on yours, and the way his body rocked against yours, and his hard cock pushing against your entrance–

“Ah–haaa, fuck–Chenle!” you moaned loudly when he pushed in slowly, stretching you out delightfully. 

He swallowed your moans with his kisses, between hushed praises for taking him so well. 

“My pretty princess…” he breathed out once he bottomed up completely. He grabbed one of your thighs and pushed it up and outwards before rolling his hips experimentally. He starts very slowly, allowing you to feel every vein of his cock dragging against your inner walls and you have no words to describe how good it feels.

His eyes lit up when he hit a spot that made you arch your back, aiming to hit it harder.

“What happened to that fierce attitude?” he teased when you let out a strangled moan.

You only looked at him with wide eyes, grabbing onto his shoulders clumsily without knowing what to do with yourself. Having him inside of you after having consummated the bond made everything feel 10 times more intense. There was nothing you could possibly say to express how good it felt to have your mate’s cock kissing your cervix so divinely. 

“Poor Y/N,” Chenle spoke condescendingly, using his thumb to wipe some drool off the corner of your mouth. “Cock so good you can’t speak?”

You try to think of a comeback. You really do, but how could you when he was filling you all the way up and hitting all the right places–at the same time?

He chuckled darkly, snapping his hips hard once, twice and then building up a steady rhythm that had you screaming like he always wanted you to.

“Oh g-god…” was the first coherent sentence you said, throwing your head back.

 “That’s my princess,” he praised, pressing his face into the crook of your neck. “Submitting for her mate–haa…,” he moaned as he nosed along your neck, looking for the right spot to leave his mark.

“C-chenle–” you whined, feeling yourself getting closer the more his pelvis grinded against your clit.

He sank his teeth into your skin and you felt that white pleasure consume you again, making you cum with a silent scream and your legs shake around Chenle’s waist.

He winced when you contracted around his cock, murmuring nonsense about how tight and perfect you were for him while licking the fresh wound on your neck.

You were shaking like a leaf, whispering his name like it was the only thing you knew and he just didn’t stop.

“Fuck! P-please!” you cried out when he pressed his hips against yours harshly and moved them in a circular way before resuming his unrelenting assault. 

You didn’t think you could take any more so you tried to push him away weakly, but he pinned you down by your wrists. 

Both of you knew you weren’t actually trying to rebel anymore, but his wolf loved to show off his strength, making you submit. He had wanted to dominate you the moment he met you, but his rut had turned that want into a need. 

“C-can’t,” you sobbed, but the more you squirmed, the harder he fucked you.

“You’re g-gonna take it,” he grunted, squeezing your wrists and thrusting fast enough to make you see stars. 

Tears slid down your face but you nodded obediently and that sent Chenle into a frenzy. He let go of your wrists to grab onto your waist, sitting up and ramming into you at a speed he didn’t know he was capable of.

“Aah…Haa, fuck, Y/N–my obedient little mate, yeah…” he moaned.

You whined at the praise, letting him fuck every coherent thought out of your head.

“All you have t-to do is take it,” he spoke with slurred words as he impaled you into his cock like a ragdoll. “Let me have you like this,” he emphasized the last word with a hard thrust. “Let me m-make you feel good mm…”

You nodded dumbly while he pounded you on the bed.

“Look this pretty–oh fuck, so pretty for me,” he sounded strained, and his movements were haltering. “Let me g-give you anything you could…oooh anything y-you could possibly want,” he was getting desperate, feeling his knot starting to form was pushing him over the edge. “L-let me…,” he gulped, forcing his knot into you and making you scream. “Oooh Y/N, fuuuck–”

You couldn’t breathe. It was too much. He was too deep, and he was trying to pull you impossibly closer as his cock throbbed inside of you and he finally came with a shaky sigh, shooting endless spurts of cum inside of you.

Your eyes rolled back as he convulsed on top of you, once again pinning your wrists just for show, to remind you he was in charge.

Once both of you came down from your high, Chenle took in the view and beamed with pride. 

You were sprawled out on your back, with his mark on your neck, fucked dumb, submissive, completely overstimulated, impaled on his cock, and full of what soon would be his pups. 

This was what he would wake up to everyday, in this very apartment he had bought for both of you.

Meanwhile, on the ship, Captain Hongjoong put his spyglass down and walked away from the window, letting out an impressed whistle.

“Seongwha, make preparations for a farewell party,” he requested, sitting on his chair and putting his feet on the table. “Looks like Y/N’s staying in this town.”

“You’re so mean,” Seongwha replied, unimpressed. “You knew this would happen when you sent her to speak with him.”

“She’ll thank me one day,” Hongjoong assured him, winking playfully.

[reiderwriter]

I'm curious to hear your thoughts about the dom/sub debate when it comes to mr Spencer Reid.I personally lean towards believing he is more of a soft/rough dom depending on the day.And especially since your dom spencer fanfictions are some of my absolute favorites of all time (the margaritas part 2 had me weak on the knees),I would love to hear you profile my favorite profiler as to if he is a dom or a sub,which you believe is more true.(I know which one is like to believe to be more true😂)I would love to read your insight to his brain and how you understand him!Have a great day!! :)

Oh I would LOVE to get into it, and this is going to be a season by season break down so please bare with me lmao

Spoilers (kinda) for season 1-15 of Criminal Minds under the cut, only read up to where you are in the show!

Season One

You may be thinking "surely that is a sub" and you would be right, if he was having sex, which he is very clearly not. He graduated from his third PhD and then immediately joined the BAU, that is a virgin, your honor.

Season Two

At some point in season one, he loses his virginity. Probably to Lila Archer, maybe to Elle (no further questions, there are some amazing fanfictions that fill in this). But whoever he is doing it with is absolutely dominating him, he just doesn't know it.

Season Two Spencer is curious about BDSM, but having what he assumes is Vanilla sex (just because he isn't calling women Mommy yet, he thinks that he is having normal sex, when in reality he's like pathetically whining asking for release).

During his ongoing addiction days, I think he'd be more than happy to just switch off his brain during sex and just follow orders, do what he's told.

Season Three

A sub and he knows it. Still feels unconfident enough to not be in charge in the relationship, he likes switching his brain off when he fucks. But something does start to switch and he's suddenly a little bit more confident this season, so I can see him being a bit of a brat - talks back, doesn't follow rules, really very mouthy in front of other.

((The majority of my sub Spencer smut is set at around this time - I ❤️ whiny brats lmao))

Season Four

This is where I can see him becoming a bit more confident but I don't think he's a dom yet. I do think he's absolutely taking advantage of his leg injury and absolutely loving being ridden, not having to put in any work. I think after all this he decides he really likes the look on the other person's face when they're on the edge of ecstasy and he wants to explore drawing that out a bit.

Season Five

I think we're experimenting here. So many things have happened in his life by this point that I think he needs to gain control in some part of his life, and his sex life is just the easiest option. He's still giving switch energy, but that sudden short haircut? The brattier energy? He's suddenly coming into himself again, and he's definitely comfortable being a little more dominant now. But he's not an experienced dom yet, so I think he's just taking charge and telling his partners what to do, he's not into choking/ punishment/ degradation yet.

I can't remember if its season five or six where he points out he isn't a typical "alpha male." A lot of people take this to mean that he's calling himself a sub, which could definitely be the case, but also, I think he likes being underestimated sexually, because it makes it more exciting for him when he does get the upper hand in the relationship, which he does in that episode (he interviews the wife and then tells her that her husband killed the actual father of her child and makes her stare at their faces until she cracks and breaks down into tears. He offers her no comfort is all I'm saying... 👀)

Season Six

This is controversial, but I think from this point on, Spencer is fully a dom. He has that scare where he thinks he's "developing" Schizophrenia, and his constant headaches, he just needs release and I think he finds it in multiple beds, lmao. He does have that moment of vulnerability at the end of the season when everything happens with Emily, so I think if he's having sex it's back to Vanilla, but like really passionate, and I'm not saying that he'd fall in love with everyone who's bed he falls into but I'm just saying he needs companionship at the end of this season.

Season Seven

This season starts with him literally cutting off the board of directors at the FBI to correct them and standing by his decisions and if that isn't the biggest dick energy ever idk what is. He's angry, and he's frustrated, and he thinks the team overlooks him a little bit, so you know what he's going to do? He's going to dominate whoever he's in bed with to regain some of that control. I can see this as the time that Spencer finally really gets into more aspects of BDSM. He let's demeaning words slip out of his mouth during sex and then notes the positive reaction they get, so he keeps doing it until he can make the other person cum.

((The majority of my dom smut with Spencer is set at around this time.))

Season Eight

This isn't a Dom, this is a dumbass. I'm pretty confident that for the first half of the season, he's not having sex, because he's committed to Maeve and he never meets her. Then after she dies he's too depressed and busy to get out there. I think if he did go out and find someone to keep him company, it'd probably back to the post-Emily-Doyle arc where he just needs to feel someone close to him someone wrapped around him, someone holding him tight, so it's slow. It's passionate and it's loving, but he's still pretty detached about it. He literally doesn't care about finding a release, he'd rather just have the physical touch for a while.

Season Nine

Straight up dom. Will choke a bitch, regularly does. I can see him getting a little bit rougher now, probably gets asked to spank one of his partners and then does NOT want to stop ever doing that. Grows to lightly slapping in the face. He does literally tell Garcia that he has a dominant side, and she straight up ignores him, though, so I think he's pretty comfortable in people "underestimating" him, I guess?

When he gets shot in the last few episodes, he's literally ready to get back out there as soon as possible, and I think that applies to sexual encounters as well. When some of his other "traumatic events" happen, I can see him taking a break for a while, but with this one, he gets medical clearance and is immediately burying his head between someone's legs.

Season Ten

I am only on season 9 of my rewatch, and to be completely honest, nothing of merit really happens to Spencer in Season 10 from my memory, so I'm just going to assume that he's basically the same.

The only thing that really can be cause for concern is Gideon's death, and I think that does truly fuck him up for a while, but that's anger and grief mixed together, so I can see him moving between rough fucks and slow passionate needy sex for a few months while he works through all of that.

Season Eleven

Spencer Reid vs Cat Adams is literally dom on dom crime, the entirety of Entropy is just them trying to be the one topping one another. And we know who wins that battle, so...

Definitely into pet names and calling his partners little sluts, whores, bitches etc. I don't want to say that Morgan babied him, because their relationship really developed a lot over the seasons and deserves it's own non-horny post lmao, but I think Morgan leaving really allowed the writers to let Spencer take more of a dominant role in interrogations, investigations and the like. And he's the last person who really considers Spencer a "kid" (apart from Rossi who literally thinks of them all as children) so he no longer has to, I guess justify? his sexual behavior. He's just all-in on it now.

Season Twelve

Pre-prison Spencer Reid in season twelve is a bad lover. He's inattentive, literally just chasing his own needs, probably pumping and dumping and now really paying attention to the aspects of a role that a dominant really should - the after care and looking after the person who is submitting to him. Then he goes to prison.

When he gets out, I can absolutely see the man suddenly having a breeding kink, wanting to be so close to someone, for someone to have such absolute confidence in him that he can fuck them raw and neither of them will care about the consequences. He's still a little damaged though, so I can see him oscillating between needing slow comforting sex, and harsh sex, really leaning into punishment/reward play and experimenting with different kinks, and maybe even public sex.

After he starts working at the University, I think role-playing and calling him "sir" would also really turn him on, and for a while he'd think it's a little gross as he's literally a teacher, but after a while he doesn't care anymore because it makes him feel so good.

Season 13-15

It's the same as above. He's dominant, but he still needs taking care of, but at this point he's so closed off from the world that he'll never be able to submit to someone again. So slow, sloppy, passionate sex, lasting for hours and hours is probably his way to go. I can see him being the type of soft! Dom that is just asking for "just one more" orgasm, over and over again, and then just overwhelming his partner with aftercare - running them a bath, cleaning them up, making them food or a hot drink, propping some pillows up behind them. He's a real gentleman, and I think his emotional distance could probably break a lot of hearts.

OVERALL

He goes from the whiniest virgin-sub to a bratty switch, all the way to a rough dom and then settles into being a very soft caring dom in his later years.

That's just my opinion though, and I'd love to hear what everyone else thinks!! I really didn't look too much into what happens in each of these seasons because I put approximately 0% research and 100% opinion and what I would want to see (lmao) into this, so if there's something specific that happens that has you thinking that he'd have a certain preference in any season then PLEASE tell me.

[bluesest]

could you do a diarrhea story in a cinema?

A Cinema

Drake has always liked the art of cinema for as long as he can remember, he always observed how it was evolving creating new genres, some strong and others weak, but no matter what, he enjoyed the magic and experience of sitting in a movie theater.When he was young, his interest in meeting people appeared, he made a great friend named Leo, Drake always accompanied him in his activities, they were classmates and they always talked, well, Drake really had no other option because he was his only friend with whom he began to form a stronger bond.

One day at the local cinema an exciting action movie was released: "Lost Bullet" (This movie already exists, but this story is not going to be related to any existing movie).

Drake and Leo were walking through the park in front of the movie theater and Leo noticed:

Leo: "Wow, look at the movie listings! Lost Bullet is going to be released next week."

Drake: "Really? We should go and see it."

Leo: "Sure!"

Drake: "Do you really want to see it?"

Leo: "Of course! I'm a fan of the original saga and I love action movies."

Drake: "So, Saturday next week?"

Leo: "I'll be there"

Drake arrived home with a big smile and excitement in his eyes, it could finally be considered as a first date… more or less, even so, the idea of going to the movies for the first time with a friend made Drake very excited, looking forward to the agreed day.

On Saturday morning Drake called his friend to make sure that the plan was not cancelled, luckily this was not the case and in a few hours they would both go to meet to buy the tickets, Drake put on his best casual clothes, combed his hair and perfumed, finally, he took his savings to, in addition to buying the ticket, buy a snack from the cinema which he would invite Leo as a generous gesture.

Arriving at the cinema in the distance he saw Leo dressed in ripped blue jeans with a green t-shirt, Leo noticed Drake's presence and greeted him from afar as he moved closer to the cinema.They both bought their tickets and walked in:

Drake: "Hey, I've brought a little extra money so I thought maybe you'd like some snacks they sell here, don't worry I'll invite"

Leo: "Sure? The food here is very expensive."

Drake: "That's no problem, I just want to make this occasion more special…"Leo: "Special in what way?"

Drake: "Special in the way that it's the first time we've gone to the movies together of course"

Luckily for Drake, the line for snacks was short, it wouldn't take more than 5 minutes, and they would get to the movie theater on time.

His turn came, and a young boy waited on him.

Seller: "What can we serve you boy?"

Drake: "Giant Popcorn Please"

Seller: "Are you sure that's it? I see that another guy is also accompanying you, how about we offer you soda?"

Drake: "um… ok also soda, thanks"

Seller: "We also have combo 1 which contains 1 hot dog with melted cheese, fried foods and a small container with extra cheese, and with the purchase of two combos 1 we offer to evolve the order to combo 2 where the hot dog is added moderately spicy chilli, bacon and tomato, and the sodas increase to medium size"

Drake wasn't sure, it was a lot of food and although the movie is 3 hours long he wouldn't know how his stomach was going to react, he was going to deny the offer until he saw how Leo was staring at the greedy combo 3, if he really wanted to impress Leo, he had to get what he wanted.

Drake: "How about two combos 3"

Seller: "Combo 3 contains…"Drake: "Just give it to me, the movie is about to start…"

Seller: "At your service!"It took 3 minutes until Drake received two plastic trays of what would be the maximum combo that cinema could offer, Leo walked up to Drake, took one of the trays:

Leo: "Did you really pay for all this? For me?"Drake: "Well… I couldn't skimp on any expense if it was my… best friend"

Leo: "Thank you very much"

Drake flushed and was interrupted by Leo's strong arm grabbing his arm to run and reach the room, it was so fast that almost all the food staggered to the point of falling, they looked for their seats that were located in the horizontal and vertical center of the room.

The trailers started and Leo was already devouring his food: "Try it, it tastes amazing!", Shyly Drake took a bite of his hot dog… His taste was amazing and he started devouring the first hot dog (combo 3 includes two hot dogs).

The movie started and Drake had already eaten half of his plate, Leo surprised put his hand on Drake's shoulder and said: "Save a little for the movie dude" making him blush even more and calm down a little.

The first 30 minutes of the movie had passed, everything was going well, Drake hadn't touched his plate since Leo told him, a stomach roar echoed in his head, "Sure it's hunger" he thought so he went back to take the second hot dog and ate it slowly preventing his condiments from falling on the floor, When he finished the roar had not gone away, on the contrary, it increased, so he began to eat the fried foods he had spreading them on the chili, melted cheese and extra guacamole that belonged to combo 3, at the first hour of the movie his belly began to hurt, Drake feared that the pain was caused by something else besides hunger, But he followed up with the last of the combo: buttered popcorn and the giant glass of soda.

30 more minutes passed, I officially reached the middle of the movie when another stomach roar hit him off guard, he began to massage his stomach and his forehead began to sweat thanks to the pains followed, another roar made Drake feel a small air trapped between his intestines, he turned to look at Leo, he was attentive to the movie with a small smile admiring the giant screen, Nervously, Drake leaned over a bit and… *pppfftfttfIt* was a small, silent fart, the smell was compact and intertwined around Drake's sweaty body, he flipped again and apparently Leo hadn't noticed, the noise of the movie and the air conditioning in the movie theater was able to attack the smell limiting it to being close to his father.

Drake breathed a sigh of relief hoping that this situation would not be repeated, but due to his bad luck in 5 minutes another pain came, a great acidity focused on his stomach where something terrible was cooking, but while the pot began to boil the smoke began to come out traveling through the giant caves of the large intestine until it touched the anal sphincter of the exhausted Drake: *GRRRRRRRRRRR*

He took his hand and brought it to his stomach, the pain made him squirm in his seat when he felt that another gas was about to come out of him, he bent over and a more violent fart came out: *PPPFFFttttttt*

this one started with a big bang and then took on a high-pitched sound, you could certainly hear it if you had a good ear.

Leo: "Do you smell anything strange?"

Drake: "No, why do you say so?"

Leo: "This place sucks, they should clean it better"

Drake: "Yes, of course"

The smell was dissolved enough that it could pass as a stench of dirt rather than intestines or junk food, Leo began to notice Drake's smells thinking that they are typical of the movies, Drake knew that he needed a better strategy to prevent his discomfort from being noticed, he took off his jacket and covered his hips with it, Then he apply enough pressure that the seat ends up forming around his butt creating a small prison for smells and sounds.

Leo saw what Drake was doing and asked, surprised:

Leo: "Hey, is something wrong?"

Drake: "It's okay…"

Leo: "Do you look uncomfortable and I think you're sweating a lot, does it hurt at all?"

Drake: "Not at all Leo, I'm just too hot, that's why I took off my jacket"

Leo: "If you say it... *BOOM* WOW! Look at that explosion!"

Of course, that was the solution, Drake thought, at this point they were already two hours into the movie, it was clear that the last hour would be the one with the most action: gunshots and explosions were the perfect façade to hide the sound of their clashing buttocks in a better way.

Drake was attentive to the big screen, not so much for the plot, but for the explosions and in a bold way managed to synchronize his farts with each of them:

*POOOOOMMMMMM*

*PPFPPFPPDFTFTFTFTFTFTF*

*BOOOMMMMMMM*

*PRRPRPRPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*

*UFFOFFCHOCHOMMMMMMM*

*PFFPFFPFTTTTTTTTPPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR*

The farts were getting longer and more recurrent, little by little his stomach started to get more and more agitated: *GRGRGRGRRRRRRRR*, Drake brought both his hands to his stomach trying to soothe the pain with massages, but it didn't work, *GRGGRRRRRR*, he lifted his butt and didn't even care if there was an explosion or not and farted *PPFFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTTFTF* *PFTTFTF* this was the most violent of all so far, The humidity of it warned him that the chili was about to come out, there was still half an hour to finish the film, he still couldn't give up.

He turned to look at Leo and saw that he had a disgusted face, Leo noticed, turned around and said:

Leo: "Drake, it really sucks this place, like something's rotting..."

Drake: "Don't worry about it, it's only 30 more minutes and we'll get out of here"

Leo: "Check your seat, I think that's where the smell comes from"

Drake was embarrassed, Leo was beginning to suspect him, the smell could not even get rid of the air anymore and the worst thing is that the gas trap contained the smell but did not eliminate it, little by little the gases stuck in the seat began to leak making a putrefying aura form around Drake that could already be noticed meters away from him, Pretending and trying to convince Leo that the smell wasn't coming from him, he began to search his seat, obviously to no avail.

They both continued to watch what was left of the movie, about 10 minutes already, which Drake had to keep his gas as deep into his intestines as possible, he could not allow Leo to realize what was happening to him, the typical situation of diarrhea on the first date.

Coming almost to the end, the protagonists of the film had to defuse a large bomb of a large shopping mall, it would be the biggest explosion of all, but it will be overcome by Drake who could no longer hold on and urgently needed to release the air trapped in his anus.

The countdown to the explosion of the bomb arrived, the protagonist tried to disarm it without success, when he reached number 1, Drake relaxed his sphincter confidently until he heard something terrible: "I defused it!".

It was too late, the fake explosion could have been avoided, but not the real one:

*PFPTPPTFPTPFTPPFPFPFPFPPPPPPTPTPTPTPFD* *PPTDTTDTSTTSTSTSFTFTFTTFTFTTFTFRR* *GRRERRGRGRGRRRRR* *PRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* *SQHHSQSH* 

Everyone in the movie theater was silent staring at Drake's seats and Leo, the latter turned to Drake and said: "You...", Drake ran out of the place, in addition to taking a great embarrassment, he also took a small gift from the fart, the diarrhea was able to leak and be successfully expelled staining Drake's underwear with a hot and thick mixture.

Seller: "Boy, don't run in the aisles!"

Finally, Drake arrived at the public bathroom of the cinema, ran until he almost slipped, sat in the last cubicle of the place, closed the door, undressed and finally his ass kissed the much-appreciated cold porcelain:

*PRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR* *HSQHQSBHSHQSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHHHHH* *PFFTTFT* *SQHQHSHSHSHSHSHQSHQSHSH* *PRRRRRRPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS*

Drake felt his butt dripping lava directly from an erupting super volcano, the acidity of his stomach began to attack him and:

*RPPPRRPRRRRF* *QSHHQHSQHSHQSHSHSHQHHSQSHHS* *QHHSHQSHQSSHSHSH* *GRGRGRGRGGRGR* *PPPFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTTTTT* *PSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPPSPPSPPSPPSPPS*

The pain was acute, Drake began to sweat like crazy and took off his shirt, took some toilet paper and wiped his forehead, panting he gathered strength to continue expelling the diarrhea:

*FPTPPPFTFPPTFPTPFPFPFPPTTTTTTTT* *PRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR* *GRGRGRGGRR* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPPSPSPPSPS* *PFFTFTTFFTTF* *PDPSPSPSPPSPSPPRPRPRPRPRPRPR* 

The pain continued, Drake with both arms grabbed small railings that were in the cubicle holding them tightly, closed his teeth and spread his legs until he heard someone enter: "Drake, are you here?"

Drake raised his legs as high as he could praying for Leo to get out of there, but his stomach played dirty:

*PPPFPFPFPPPPFPTPTPTPTPTPTPPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPT*

A loud fart gave away his location, Leo knocked on the cubicle door:

Leo: "Are you okay buddy?"

Drake: -No answer-

Leo: "I never thought that food would hurt you so much, I also didn't think the smell was coming from you, but why didn't you ask to go to the bathroom, the movie wasn't so good that you don't want to skip any parts..."

Drake: "I'm sorry, I ruined everything"

Leo: "Don't say that, it can happen to anyone and I understand it"

Drake: "I didn't want to leave you alone...*GRRRRRRR*"

Leo: "Please, it's not the first time I've been to the movies, I'm not going to miss it or something"

Drake: "I-"

A sharp pain interrupted Drake, preparing for the worst he couldn't help but cry out in pain:

*PRRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR*

The place was in a great silence, both were surprised and could not say any words, bravely Leo was the one who calmed Drake:

Leo: "Forgive me, I shouldn't have proposed to you to come here and I shouldn't have come in even though I knew you were sick to my stomach, I won't tell anyone and we'll pretend that none of this happened."

Drake: "Don't apologize, I really wanted to come here, with you"

Leo: "As a... date?"

Drake: "Yes... *GRRRRR* if it makes you uncomfortable, we can also pretend I never said this"

Leo: "No... I think it was a wonderful first date after all."

Drake: "Thank you... *PFPPFPFPFPTPTPPPPTPTPPT* *SQHQHSQHSHSQSHQHSHQ*"

Leo: "I'll leave you alone..."

Drake: "No, stay, I want someone to be with me because it really hurts a lot, plus there's no toilet paper in this cubicle."

Leo: "Of course"

PS: I have about 4 proposals for a story in the cinema, I was finally able to fulfill this, and I like the result.

[csuitebitches]

Book Review: Book 2: The Art of Everyday Assertiveness (a 9-part series by Patrick King, “Be Confident and Fearless.”)

Book one review here.

I found this book had 20% of the content from the first book so I’ve avoided putting the same things again and again in this review.

Forward identifies these overwhelming feelings as the three underlying components in emotional blackmail: fear, obligation, and guilt (FOG).

The four types of blackmail:

1. The punisher’s threat occurs when the victim receives this message from the perpetrator: “Do what I want, or you will suffer negative consequences.”

2. The self-punisher’s threat takes advantage of the victim’s sense of guilt by sending the message, “Do what I want, or I will make myself suffer negative consequences.” Often this scenario includes high drama.

3. Closely related to the self-punisher’s threat is the sufferer’s threat. Rather than the threat of self-harm, the manipulator in this situation says, “Do what I want, or I will suffer negative consequences from the outside.” Consequences are external and not self-inflicted.

4. The final form of emotional blackmail is identified as the tantalizer’s threat. Rather than threatening a negative consequence, the perpetrator sends the message, “Do what I want, and you might enjoy positive consequences.”

-

The key to avoiding victimization is by taking time and learning to recognize feelings of fear, obligation, and guilt. This can be achieved by asking a few very simple questions:

“Am I not asserting myself by my own free will? Is this truly what I want, or is there a reason related to fear, obligation, or guilt?”

“Am I acting out of anxiety or excitement?”

-

Asking for help:

1. Ask and then stop talking.

Don’t follow up your ask with things like “only if you want”, “its up to you” etc.

2. Create a win win.

When asking for something from the other person, ask yourself:

- Are their needs being considered?

- How can this request benefit them?

- Is this a good time to make such a request?

- If the tables were turned, how would I view this request?

3. Make it easy.

Do not expect people to go out of their way in order for you to request a favor. Instead of your natural inclination to hedge with “Can we meet? Only if you have time,” you can substitute it with “Can we meet? Lunch is on me at your favorite sandwich place.” The key here is to make your ask smaller than it needs to be so it will be better received, and easier to squeeze out.

4. Offer clear cut options

if you are asking for someone to watch your dog, offer to take him to their place or let them stay at your place and use your building’s gym facilities while you are out of town. Also, make sure they have a way to say no without feeling guilty in case they cannot or do not want to do what you have asked.

5. Be direct.

Don’t have any ulterior moves. Express the ask as it is in your mind.

6. Be specific

Don’t ask vague, open ended questions. Inform them where they can exactly help you.

7. If someone says no, don’t be disheartened.

-

Types of assertion:

1. Empathic: acknowledge their feelings, appreciate them but be firm with your stance.

2. Consequence: a last resort if someone has made you reach the end of your tolerance. State what they did; how it made you feel; and the consequence of them not apologising/ taking responsibility.

3. Negative feelings: describe their (unwanted/ unjust) behaviour objectively, directly and specifically. Tell them how it impacted your describe your feelings as exactly as you can. State your preferred behaviour. “When you didn’t show up at the date we had planned, I had to cancel our reservations and felt embarrassed and hurt. In the future, could you just call me if you can’t make it?”

4. Discrepancy: when something happens due to a misunderstanding, lack of follow ups or unclear inventions. “I thought we were meeting for coffee at noon. Was I mistaken?”

-

In a 2010 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, researchers analyzed people’s reactions to selfish versus generous actions in a game about rewards. They found that instead of appreciating the generous players, these were actually as equally disliked as the selfish ones. You may have tried taking on the dirty jobs nobody else wants or paying a bar tab at a work party in the hope it would endear you to a group. This is actually likely to have the opposite effect; your extreme generosity makes people just as uncomfortable as the selfish people who make life more difficult or refuse to contribute.

-

University of Notre Dame Researchers in 2011 found that disagreeable employees earned more than their agreeable counterparts. Disagreeable men earned 18% more than agreeable men. Agreeableness is a more socially expected norm in women, but disagreeable women still earned 5% more than the agreeable women, and these agreeable women lagged far behind the disagreeable men.

-

Communication styles: figure out your pattern in order to break it:

1. Passive

- low self esteem

- Dont express opinions or desires

- Avoidant

- Anger can build up quietly over time and then erupt

- Weak eye contact

- Bad posture

- Dont understand their own needs

2. Aggressive

- verbal, physical violence

- Put their own needs before others

- Overbearing

- Intense eye contact

- Poor listeners

- Impulsive

- Criticises 24/7

3. Passive aggressive

- appear to be “fine” but are not fine inside

- Sarcastic often

- Alienate themselves

- Sabotage

4. Assertive

- speaking up for themselves

- Clear

- Direct

- Good listeners

- High self esteem

- Open, relaxed body language

- Can navigate any situation without resentment, anger or loss of control

The passive communicator says, “People walk all over me,” and “No one cares how I feel about this.”

The aggressive communicator says, “I always get what I want—whatever it takes,” and “You’re worthless; you owe me.”

The passive-aggressive communicator says, “That’s fine . . . (That’s what you think),” and “They’ll see what happens to people who cross me.”

The assertive communicator says, “We’re both entitled to respectfully express our opinion,” and “I’m responsible for myself and no one owes me anything.”

-

Before you start to apologize, stop and ask yourself two questions:

“Did I actually do something wrong?”

And if not, “Did I really want to communicate that I think I did?”

If you over apologise, ask yourself:

1. What’s the first reaction you have when someone tells you no?

2. Was advocating on your own behalf off-limits in your family? Was it encouraged?

3. When you were younger, was it acceptable to speak up and share your opinion?

4. What other major experiences shaped your outlook regarding asserting yourself and respecting authority, particularly at the workplace?

-

Confronting a dominant personality doesn’t have to be combative. Simply ask, “Are you open for feedback on this?” If they say yes, which most people will, you can start by saying, “I tend to think of these things from a different perspective.” It keeps the conversation neutral. You’re not attacking their point of view. Instead, you’re just sharing yours.

-

Dr. Beth Polin, an assistant professor of management at Eastern Kentucky University and coauthor of The Art of the Apology, defines an apology as a statement that includes one or more of six components:

1. An expression of regret: This is the actual “I’m sorry” statement.

2. An explanation: This is a clarification of what happened, not a justification.

3. An acknowledgment of responsibility: In other words, owning up to your mistakes.

4. A declaration of repentance: For example, “I truly regret what I did.”

5. An offer of repair: “Maybe I can turn this around.”

6. A request for forgiveness: “I know I messed up, but I’m truly sorry and I’m asking your forgiveness.”

-

Assertiveness action plan:

1. Write down the times in your life where you have not felt assertive (been laughed at, walked all over, taken advantage of, etc)

2. Write down how you reacted (can be good/ bad/ neutral)

3. Write down the healthy response you would’ve given in that situation

4. Write a list of what you should avoid using from your internal dialogue or with other people. Also write a list of phrases that you feel more comfortable with that are also assertive.

- the author has a full schedule/ plan for 26 days on the assertiveness action plan with exercises. I didnt include everything, but i included things that I feel I can do.

[home-fire]

Mini Statue Resources

I've spent a lot of time looking for miniature statues of the gods to use in my travel altars, and in my search learned that mini statues-- especially anything under 3"-- are very hard to find. A lot of people have also seemed interested in the Hestia mini I have, and asked where I got her. So I thought I would share some resources I've found for very small statues and advice for finding them yourself. I hope they'll be helpful!

Sellers I've Found

3DvoPrinting (etsy)

They have a nice selection of 3D of prints of classical sculptures, including a lot of less "popular" statues. They come between 3-5" tall, priced around $12-18. I just put in an order for a custom size (1.5-2") of the Hermes and Asclepius figures, and they offer custom larger sizes as well.

3DorisArt (etsy)

They have a large collection of prints, but my interest was in the 4" line, which range from $17 to $28. I contacted them about getting smaller prints of these and they said that was doable. I haven't ordered from them yet but hope to get a custom size Dionysus soon.

MurphicIndustries (etsy)

This is where I got my mini Hestia! They have this whole set available, and also sell figures individually. They come in 32mm, 48mm, 54mm and individual figures start at $4-5.

twogreenthumbs.com

They sell mini garden supplies, and have a section with mini garden decor, including a lot of classical statues (I think these would probably have a spike under the base that you'd need to remove). Most of them are between 2.5 and 3.5" tall and $7-8 each. They also have a lot of mini pedestals and urns as well.

Edensart (etsy)

They sell dollhouse minis, including 1:12 scale prints of marble statues, including some classical ones. They're extremely small and so lower detail, and run around $6.60

BigManSmallWorld (etsy)

They specialize in very fancy and detailed art pieces for dollhouses, and their minis are already painted and decorated. Most of their mini statues are $30+

Advice for finding stuff on your own:

Although there are a lot of resources out there for finding smaller statues, I've found getting anything under 5" very difficult and under 3" almost impossible. For 3D prints if you can't find something in the size you want, I'd suggest finding one you like in a similar size and asking about getting it printed smaller for you.

I've had the most luck looking for mini-garden, dollhouse, and gaming miniatures. Searching by height is generally useless, but including scale can be helpful.

A lot of places have the statues misnamed (the Hermes statue I ordered, for example, is listed as Apollo) or aren't identified at all, so looking for generic terms like "marble statue" "god" "goddess" "classical" etc can be helpful if the right name isn't bringing anything up.

There are also a lot of Etsy sellers that specialize in dollhouse minis that have one or 2 little statues (esp. the more popular ones like Apollo Belvidere, Venus de Milo etc.) I've only included ones here that have a decent selection of them, but there are certainly options for little statues on Etsy beyond what I've shared.

The only statue of Aphrodite/Venus anyone wants to make replicas of is the Venus de Milo, so good luck to you if you're looking for literally any other representation they are on in a million. (I've included 3 here so...)

There are also some old school gaming minis that are Greek myth-themed, such as Foundry's series, but old school minis tend to be overall much more expensive, less detailed, and generally less aesthetically pleasing.

[gravedigginbbydoll]

Hawkins University : The Munson Edition

AN: Hey! So this is our first chapter from the perspective of reader! The use of Bug is just as a nickname I find cute. Also pls remember reblogs are appreciated !

→ cliches: friends to lovers, heavy use of nicknames instead of Y/N, we're all just struggling college kids, Music Tutor! Eddie, Resident Assistant! Reader, good girl x bad boy, instant connections, 'I don't trust most people but I trust you', 'are we friends or more?', and 'I can't believe you're such a slut that you have a special dtf drawer...'

→ warnings: mature topics, drinking and drug usage, strong language, bullying, mental health, eventual smut, minors dni

→ pairing: modern!college!eddie x college!fem!reader

<Previous Masterlist Next>

Chapter 2 

Bug’s POV 

When the semester started, you thought everything was flowing well. Your job as a Resident Assistant was rewarding though stressful, your professors were generally pretty easy going, and you had signed up for the easiest class to take in order to complete your art credit. 

At least, you thought you had. 

You had come into the classroom on the first day, only to find empty seats, panic overcoming your senses. 

You had quickly emailed the professor, hoping maybe she’d respond soon. 

She hadn’t replied until that Friday. 

You had opened the email on the desk computer while still at work, trying to complete small tasks and homework while the dorm lobby was quiet. Just reading the first few sentences, you felt your stomach drop to the floor. 

The class had been dissolved, not enough students signing up for the History of Women in Art course. You felt panic bubble up in you as you scrambled to email your advisor, forwarding them the email and asking for a meeting to discuss further what to do. You refrained from including a rant about misogyny and how feminine influences were often undermined and ignored, although you felt an itch to do so. 

You really didn’t care about it at the moment, truth be told, but were more so worried about graduating soon. You had planned to finish your art elective and put your nose to the grind on your major, working hard to finish within the next year. 

You couldn’t start those advanced courses, however, without this last art elective course. 

You sighed with relief as your advisor emailed you back quickly, asking you to meet with her on Monday so you could discuss alternative options and classes. You got back to doing your homework and helping residents, humming as you went.

Hopefully, you’d be back on track soon.

“I’m afraid all the other courses are filled up,” She stated, her expression apologetic, her hands folded in front of her like a prayer. 

You felt your mouth go dry. 

Full? 

You could kiss early graduation and your money goodbye. How were you supposed to graduate on time and have your loans forgiven if you couldn’t even do this one measly course? 

“There’s gotta be something,” You offered weakly, your palms clammy as you tried to wipe your hands on your jean covered thighs. 

She pursed her lips, brows pinched in thought as she sighed. “Well there is one course. It’s got a few spaces empty. But it’s a music course and requires an instrument. It is for beginners though. You’d be at a disadvantage but…” 

You perked up, your heart pounding. You were notoriously bad at instruments. You had attempted to take up orchestra in middle school, only to find out that you had zero patience to practice and stick with the skill. Plus, cellos were heavy. 

But, you were desperate. 

A determined look fell over your face as you nodded. 

“Where do I sign up?” 

You had signed up for the course, your advisor vouching for you to the professor, who seemed a bit concerned at you coming in two weeks late but had decided to trust you. You rented a guitar from the local music store, The Ghost Note, and picked the cheapest option. 

The first day you had come into class you could feel your nerves tingling. You had gotten in, but now you just had to pass. You wouldn’t be too stressed if Professor Howard hadn’t told you about the in person tests they took, which essentially consisted of doing a short set of chords and proving that you could read the sheet music. 

You sat down, opening your guitar case and pulling the huge and foreign feeling instrument into your lap. You had settled in when a tumble of limbs and hair rushed into the seat next to you. You peeked out of the corner of your eye, seeing a tall and lean man with unruly curls pulled back into a loose bun throw off a worn out black backpack. He was quite a character, dressed in black ripped jeans, worn out combat boots on his feet, and a faded out Misfits band tour shirt, while a distressed and patched up black jean jacket lay over it. He wore a lot of chains and silver jewelry, his nails painted black in contrast. He seemed to settle into his seat, pulling out his guitar from a case customized in stickers just as much as his jacket, the white paint against the darker and well worn wood catching your attention. 

THIS MACHINE SLAYS Dragons, it read in sloppy handwriting, the last word not all in capitals like its predecessors, indicating that whoever had hand painted it had miscalculated how much space they had. You felt a smile tug at your lips. It was clearly a fantasy play on Woody Guthrie’s famous anti-fascist guitar. It was amusing and almost endearing that this very tall and intimidating alternative musician had referenced an old folk singer in the nerdiest way. 

You found your mouth opening before you could stop yourself. 

“A Guthrie fan, huh?,” You joked, catching his attention. 

He looked at you, and you felt your throat tighten and your face burn with heat. Oh. He was attractive. He had full brows set in a slight pinched expression over big doe brown eyes, and pink full lips, slight scruff on his face like he had just forgotten recently to shave. His eyes were scanning you, almost like he was trying to figure you out. You swallowed, your mouth drier than the desert. He opened his mouth to speak right as your professor came up to the front of the class, catching the mystery boy’s attention again. 

You sighed in relief, fidgeting in your chair to get comfortable with the large instrument once again and try to calm the fire alight in your chest. Maybe this class wouldn’t be too bad. 

You took it back. You hated this class. About 15 minutes in, you felt your fingers begin to cramp and the heat traveled from the back of your neck to the very tips of your ears. The cute man seated next to you had his nose scrunched up and lips pulled down in a frown at every dissonant chord you strummed. You couldn’t help but feel bitter, his fingers gliding over the neck of the guitar as if it was second nature. 

What the hell. 

By the end of the class, you felt like your hand was rusted metal, all creaky and stiff. You kept flexing your fingers and wincing. 

You noticed Professor Howard getting ready to leave and leaped up, walking over to ask about tutoring. You clearly would need help and as much as it killed you to ask for help to learn how to just strum a few strings, you couldn’t risk failing. 

“Hey…So I am so grateful you let me in this class, Mr. Howard. I know it’s late and all, what with me being behind two weeks. But I have to be honest, I am not… the most musically inclined. I just was wondering if you have any tutoring, or offer some help outside of class?,” You asked politely, trying to hide your nervous fidgeting. 

Mr. Howard furrowed his bushy brown brows, wearing his confusion as clear as day on his face. “Tutoring? For beginning guitar?,” He questioned, his tone suggesting that it was almost as ridiculous as suggesting that male media arts majors stop praising films like Citizen Kane as ‘gospel’. (You’d seen it yourself, once suggesting to a casual date your freshman year that it wasn’t your favorite movie, only to be met with a 30 minute rant about your taste in ‘films’ and how you were ‘uncultured’.) 

You felt the embarrassment sink in as you laughed a little, your hands making big gestures as you spoke, a nervous habit. “Yeah, I know. I just struggle with the chords and placing my fingers, and I really want to be successful in this course-” 

Mr. Howard cut you off with a gently raised hand and an apologetic look. “I’m afraid I don’t do tutoring. At least not for this course. You are welcome to rent out the space to practice on your own time. Otherwise I suggest maybe approaching a classmate for help,” He offered gently. 

Panic settled into your skin, you swallowed as your throat felt tight. You hated talking to strangers and didn’t know a soul in this class. You tried to smile, feeling it falter, your eyes stinging with unshed tears. Fuck. 

“Please, Mr. Howard, I don’t know anyone in this course and I can’t risk failing-” 

He frowned, eyebrows furrowed as he sighed, clearly wanting to help. “Well, I’m sure Mr. Munson would be more than happy to help. He teaches private lessons at The Ghost Note and my niece takes them. He’s probably the best student I’ve had in this class,” He gestured toward the classroom and you turned. It was the mystery man who sat next to you cringing at your playing the entire class, slowly packing away his things. The moment your eyes landed on him, it was like someone hit the gas in his brain, as he shrugged on his bag quickly and briskly walked towards the door. 

You nodded and thanked Mr. Howard for his help, backing up slowly to grab your things and race out of there. You grabbed everything, racing out the door, seeing him briskly trying to exit the building. You felt the flutter of nerves as you raced to catch up, your guitar case repeatedly hitting your thighs and definitely leaving a bruise, but you didn’t have time to concern yourself with it. 

“Hey! Wait!,” You shouted, the noise echoing in the hallways of the building. 

He winced at the noise, but stopped in his tracks, slowly turning around to face you. 

You stopped in front of him, your guitar case dropped helplessly to the floor as you were hunched over, getting out the words before you could catch your breath. 

“Look, I know I play like shit and my guitar is a very shitty rental, but I need to take this class in order to graduate early, because it’s my last non-major course, and all the other art electives are filled up. Professor Howard said you’re like the most talented student in the class and that his niece has you private tutor her at the music store, and I really really need an A in this class. So…Can you help me? Please?,” You breathlessly spilled out, huffing from having to chase after him, your hands on your knees. 

You looked up at him, seeing his clearly irritated expression, his mouth in that frown again. Your eyes begin to sting again as panic overwhelms you and your thoughts race, your hands shaking at your sides. 

Well, you're going to fail. You’ll fail, be unable to graduate next year, lose the loan forgiveness, and have to pay for everything out of pocket and maybe even drop out. Long gone are your hopes of being an independent adult and -

He looked down at you, his expression hard at first before softening as he saw you. He seemed to explore your face before biting his lip, looking away and rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. 

 “Alright. I’ll help you.” 

You exchanged numbers and details with the strangely attractive musician, him typing his name in your phone as Eddie with a little skull and crossbones emoji. You simply wrote Bug with a goofy caterpillar emoji on his very cracked and old smartphone. When he looked at you confused as he glanced at the contact, given that it wasn’t the name you’d told him, you shrugged. 

“It’s a nickname I’ve had since I was a kid. Short for lovebug, I guess. That or because I am actually deathly afraid of insects and everyone thinks that it’s hilarious,” You joked, smiling shyly. 

He nodded, a slight smirk on his face as he nodded and pocketed his phone. “Well, I gotta head out, but I’ll text you my schedule so we can find a time to practice and work on your fingering.” 

You felt your skin grow hot before you remembered that fingering was a term for guitarists talking about moving your fingers while playing chords. You could imagine that your facial expression was something of both horror and embarrassment because Eddie laughed, his eyes crinkling at the corners as his toothy smile revealed the dimples on either side of his mouth. 

He walked backward out the doors, giving you a mock salute, the boyish grin still on his face. “Later, Bug.”

You had texted Eddie back and forth a few times, learning that he messaged like an old man. Periods, correct punctuation and full sentences. It would be painful if it wasn’t so amusing. 

You had settled on meeting up on Friday afternoons after your shift at your second job, The Recycling Bin, a reused book store. Eddie sent you the apartment complex address and number, letting you know he’d meet you outside the building. 

You showed up after work, probably still smelling like old pages and dust, struggling to wrangle the guitar out of the backseat of your tiny car, waddling over to the building he was leaning against the outside of. He had one foot against the brick wall, and a hand rolled cigarette in between his fingers, leaning his head back against the brick to blow the smoke into the air. You felt your chest get tight, your thighs shaking a bit as you walked over. You hated the smell, but couldn’t deny the way that his head fell back, exposing his neck, didn’t make you feel some… things. 

He pushed off the wall, looking over toward you and smiling, throwing his cigarette down to put it out with the toe of his boot before walking over. He was dressed in an oversized black sweatshirt with the Hawkins University logo on it despite the mild weather, the elbows hand patched with green flannel to match the dark green letters across his chest. He had his hair down this time, allowing you to see the long curls. 

“Hey Bug,” He smiled at you, before glancing down at the guitar case in your hand as if it offended him. His nose scrunched up in a way that reminded you of a toddler grossed out by his vegetables. “You brought that piece of scrap wood?” 

You frowned a bit, glaring up at him. “I’ll have you know, Munson, that I rented this from your workplace. So blame your coworkers.” 

He nodded, smiling boyishly before taking the case from you, leading the way up the stairs to his apartment. “I actually do,” He joked. “I bet Rick let you rent this thing, he’s always stoned at work.” 

You recalled that the man who serviced you did seem a bit dopey, his eyes slightly tinged red. You had kinda written it off as him being tired. You should’ve known better. 

When he reached his door, he rummaged in his pocket, fishing out a key and unlocking it. He stepped inside, opening the door wider for you to enter. “Come on in, Bug,” He smiled, allowing you to enter the small apartment, your eyes exploring his space. “Shoes off, please,” He politely chided, toeing off his own combat boots. You did the same, taking off your sneakers to leave you in your socks and placed them neatly by his haphazardly taken off shoes. You looked over toward him, seeing that he was headed with your guitar to the couch, but something else caught your eye. The big scary alternative man who smoked and wore torn and patched up clothes had on black socks covered in red D20 dice, the die of choice for tabletop roleplaying game enthusiasts. You knew this because your friend had briefly been interested in Dungeons and Dragons, talking to you about the game when she had been trying to convince you to join her party. You felt a smile creep on your face as Eddie looked at you confused from the worn out gray fabric couch, his brows furrowed. 

“What’re you looking at me like that for?” 

You grinned mischievously, walking over toward the couch, and taking a seat. 

Eddie gave you a look that read ‘okay, you’re weird’, shaking his head and strumming the guitar while humming, turning the pegs to adjust the sound. 

“So…You’re a big fantasy and TTRPG nerd, huh?,” You asked innocently, laughing when Eddie’s head shot up, his cheeks dusted a dark pink. 

“What?”

You pointed down at his socks which were slightly hidden since he was sitting cross legged on the couch. “There’s D20’s on them. And your guitar says ‘slays dragons’.” 

Eddie huffed, a slight hardness coming over his face, walls coming up. You frowned, not meaning to make him feel self conscious, just wanting to lightly tease him because you thought it was cute. “So what,” he grumbled, paying attention to tuning your guitar once again. 

You shook your head, smiling softly, trying to fight the embarrassment you felt at the mistake while wiping off clammy hands on your dark jeans. “No, it’s just… It’s…cute. Like, you don’t try to hide it, even though your clothes read like you’re trying to be big and scary, I guess?” You shrug, feeling nerves swirl in your stomach. “Sorry, that doesn’t make much sense. I didn’t mean it in a bad way.” 

Eddie softly glanced up from his tuning of your guitar, eyes no longer hard but now a soft expression before he glanced back down, messing with the pegs once again. “ S’okay,” He softly mumbled, his cheeks now a soft pink. 

You allowed your eyes to travel the apartment as he finished tuning the guitar, his humming providing a soft background to your silence. There was a TV on a dark wooden stand in the middle, and a big progress pride flag behind it. A coffee table sat in front of you and Eddie, on it a few card decks and it seemed like board games underneath. There was a corkboard on the wall by you, covered in polaroids and photographs of Eddie and some other people. Occasionally you spotted places you recognized from town. 

On the right side of the corkboard was a white dry erase board that seemed to work as a weekly calendar covered in doodles and two different types of handwriting. You could just barely make out some of the phrases, like ‘Band Rehearsal’ and ‘Basketball Practice’. Some of the board seemed to state what chores were done that week, explaining why the apartment was probably the neatest you’d seen in a while. 

“I think I got it,” Eddie stated, interrupting your light exploration of the apartment. 

“Awesome,” You nodded, grabbing the guitar from him as he stood, turning toward the hallway. 

“Gimme a sec,” He called over his shoulder. “I’ll be back with Guthrie.” 

You grinned, amused by the fact that he named his guitar, and after an old folk singer at that. 

Eddie came back into the room, sitting down with his guitar in his lap, smiling softly towards you. “Alright kid, let’s get crackin’...” 

You had spent about an hour and a half just going over four chords. Your fingers were sore, your hands cramping. You sighed as you finished going over the G chord for the 20th time. Eddie was a much stricter teacher than you expected. He made you repeatedly go through the fingering over and over before even starting to strum, making you start over if you messed up. But it was paying off. You had ended the lesson by being able to go through four chords and barely mess up, only faltering a bit. 

You placed the guitar back in the case, sinking into the couch as Eddie chuckled and came back from the kitchen with a glass of water, handing it to you. You gladly took it, thanking him and taking a sip.

“You did good, Bug. Definite improvement from class,” He joked, flopping down on the couch next to you as you set down the drink. 

“Yeah, well, I had no idea my guitar was out of tune. Thanks for your help, by the way,” You smiled softly at him. 

You both sat for a minute in silence, unsure of what to say, when Eddie’s stomach growled loudly for what you swore felt like a whole minute, causing you both to burst out in fits of laughter, you falling over toward Eddie as he doubled over. His laughter was contagious and caused you to giggle even more, your sides becoming sore as your eyes filled with tears. Eventually, you two caught your breath and you sighed, smiling over at him. 

“Wanna go get some dinner? It’s on me.”

Taglist: @josephquinnsfreckles @corrodedcoffincumslut @kirisuteg0men

[dingochef]

Pairing: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x You (OFC)

Warnings: Swearing, Smut (MDNI 18+ Only), Dirty Talk, Mutual Masturbation, Comeplay

Word Count: 3.7k

Summary: A rainy day and a random board game lets you and Jake to get to know each other better and more intimately.

Masterlist

Truth

"El, I'm bored," Jake whines from the couch where he is stretched out. You're assuming he's still there because the back of the sofa blocks your view from the kitchen. All you can see of your very tall muscular aviator boyfriend is his bare feet kicking, only slightly like a petulant toddler, in the air as he restates his current state of boredom.

"It's one day of rain, Jake. Even in San Diego it happens," you say, advancing out of the kitchen with a beer and a gin and tonic. He rolls over as you approach and perks up when you hand him the beer, an aggressive IPA he's currently obsessed with. He sits up taking the drink from you. You plunk yourself down on the couch and his arm automatically goes around you.

"Enjoy the down time, we're caught up on laundry, worked out this morning, have dinner ready to go in the oven. It's 2 pm on a rainy Sunday and we have no obligations. Let's just chill and enjoy doing nothing," you say.

"Fine, I'll take your offer of cuddling with my smoking hot girlfriend and day drinking," he sighs. You sit contentedly for a few minutes listening to the rain before Jake gets antsy again.

"Let's do something," he pleads.

"How about a board game?" you ask, not entirely sure where that idea came from.

"We have board games?" Jake asks.

You nod and pop off the couch striding towards the guest room.

"In here," you say and point to a cardboard box in the bottom of the closet. Jake pulls it out and opens it up. He pulls out a few classic games and holds them up for you to consider, including Monopoly.

"Nope, last time I played that two people got into a fist fight and we had to find an emergency dentist" you reply and Jake puts it down on the growing pile.

The usual classics like Risk, Life, and few others join the stack.

A devilish and wide smile blooms on his face,

"Oh I think we're going to play this one, El," he says, grinning as he holds up a hot pink box the size of a deck of cards that says,

"Only the Truth, X Rated Edition."

"Oh my god," you groan, "I thought I got rid of that."

You reach for the box but Jake stands up and holds the box up high above your head. He uses every one of the eleven inches he is taller than you to evade your grasp.

Crossing your arms, you give up. The urge to climb him like a tree fading as you try not to pout,

"Lydia got it for me as a gag gift. I can't believe I still have it."

Jake reads the back of the box, in a low sultry voice,

"Get to know everything spicy about your lover or someone you hope will be with this fun and exciting game. Easy setup and clothing optional."

He wags his eyebrows at the last sentence.

Rolling your eyes, you agree,

"Fine, we can play it but you have to make the next round of drinks."

Jake snickers,

"Because making a G&T is sooo hard," he grabs your hand and pulls you to the couch. He rips the box open and peels off the plastic wrap. You pick up the folded paper directions and read them.

"Umm, we can either go through the deck in order increasing 'spiciness' or," the sound of shuffling cards distracts you, "Mix them up."

You look up and Jake is sheepishly neatening up the cards on the table. "Well that decision has been made," you sigh,

"Says everyone has to answer the question, truthfully."

Jake nods and draws a card. He snickers,

"Well that's a doozy to start with. Worst sex partner.”

You take a swig of your drink,

“Second serious boyfriend in college. He was just lazy, only liked missionary and would do this weird horizontal thing every other thrust. It did nothing for me. Once he’d come he was out andI had to take care of myself. We didn’t last long after we started sleeping together. Not the greatest kisser and never gave me oral. My rule is that I have to get oral before I give. So you were a wise man to go down on me right away.”

A smile blooms across Jake's face as he relives the exact moment you're referring to.

"Your turn," you tease in a sing-song voice.

He takes a breath and groans,

“My first one night stand, while I was at Academy. Went home with a local girl and she just kind of laid there despite anything I tried to do, not that I was the most experienced at that point in my life, but I was enthusiastic. When we went doggy style, she moaned so loudly kind of like a donkey every time I pushed into her. It was distracting and weird. When she finally came, she didn’t make a sound and then just got out of bed and left me to my own devices. Yeah, that was definitely the worst.”

You snicker at the thought of a young Jake trying his hand at sleeping around. It's your turn to draw a card and you pull one of the garish pink cards off the deck and read aloud the question,

"Who was your first kiss? Huh, that must have been one of the starter questions."

“Sandra Leonard, 6th grade at a dance. You?” Jake responds.

“Mark Simmons, Homecoming dance, sophomore year of high school," you answer.

“A bit of a late bloomer?” Jake asks.

“Yeah, I didn’t really have time for much social stuff when I was training for the Olympics. Your turn.”

Jake pulls another card,

“What is your favorite genre of porn?"

“Ooh, good one. I’d probably say Gay," you answer, enjoying how Jake’s eyebrows raise.

“One, the guys are always hot and hung,” that earns a hearty laugh from him, “The guys are genuinely aroused and actually get off. There’s no exploiting a woman just for a man’s pleasure. Everyone enjoys themselves.”

He considers your words and nods in agreement. There is a brief gleam of mischief in his eye as takes a swig of beer before answering the question,

"Granny."

You're not smooth enough to school your facial features into a neutral look, whatever thought you're having is on your face making Jake laugh.

“Just kidding, I’m a pretty straight laced guy, usual man/woman couples, lesbian, and solo women.”

“Those are pretty mainstream, although that would have been the time to slip in any weird fetish you’ve been holding back. Not to kink shame you or anything."

Jake laughs,

“I promise you don’t have anything too crazy in the spank bank, just being around you is enough to get me going at an instant.”

He leans over to kiss you, the taste of the IPA heavy on his lips.

"Mmm, you taste like a pine tree. My turn!"

You read the next card aloud,

“Who was your first steady boyfriend/girlfriend?”

“Tiffany Meadows, she was my girlfriend through high school. We broke up when we went away to college. Thanks or no thanks to Facebook, I know she is happily living as a suburban stay at home Mom in Dallas with three kids.”

“Melvin Markham, freshman year of college. He was a fellow gymnast at Notre Dame. He was two years older than me.”

Jake draws the next card,

“Who'd you lose your virginity to and where?”

“Melvin, freshman year, he lived off campus. Couldn't get away with a lot of the dorms at Notre Dame, nuns and other minders everywhere.”

“I’m just laughing at the idea of you sneaking around nuns to get sexed up.”

“The joys of going to a Catholic university.”

“Sounds more strict than the academy. Which is saying something.”

“Your turn.”

“Tiffany, my senior year of high school, in her bedroom when her parents were out of town for the weekend.”

Jake picks up the next card,

"Have you ever slept with someone of the same gender?"

"First of all, what a heteronormative question, but yes I have slept with a woman, once."

Jake perks up,

"Details, please."

You pause, and then tell him,

“You have to swear never to let anyone know, especially the person I’m going to mention and their significant other. Swear you won’t.”

You hold out your pinky for the most solemn of all oaths, Jake laughs at your seriousness and agrees,

“Pinky promise.”

“Lydia and I had sex one time in college," you blurt out, enjoying how Jake's eyes bug out a little as he tries not to spit his poorly timed sip of beer out. After a few coughs his look shifts as he is probably imagining you and Lydia having sex. You give him a mock slap to stop his imagination running away on him.

“I don’t think you know, but Lydia is bisexual. She’s had a few girlfriends here and there but has tended towards men in the past couple years. Well, we were a little tipsy one night in my dorm room and Lydia confided in me she was attracted to girls, but was scared to do anything about it. She was afraid of getting involved with a girl and getting to that stage and realizing that it wasn’t for her. My tipsy brain, plus it almost feels like a rite of cliche passage for college girls now, thought the perfect solution was for Lydia and me to mess around for her to see if she liked it and I was curious too. It was good, a lot different than being with a guy, all soft and smooth versus hard muscles and stubble. I like being penetrated too much to be exclusively a lesbian, good for you.”

“What happened the next morning? Did things get weird?” he asks, his curiosity getting to him.

“It was surprisingly okay the next day. Lydia said thanks for helping her figure out some stuff. I let her know it wasn't my cup of tea, but that I was glad she got to explore that with someone she trusted. I think our friendship is so strong that that bond prevailed rather than a romantic or sexual one.”

You can tell Jake’s mind is blown.

“That’s incredibly…sweet in a way. And yes I’m glad you enjoy dick, specifically my dick.”

"You're welcome, now it's your turn.”

“Nothing quite as poetic as yours, but a few things have happened at sea. It’s really hard to say no to anyone who wants to suck your dick, female or male, when you’ve not had sex for months. You say yes and it feels polite to at least reciprocate a hand job.”

“Makes sense, and seems like a nice thing to do.”

You pull the next card,

"What sex act do you want to try?"

"I really want to watch you get yourself off, the whole thing without any help from me. I know you have some toys, but never seem to bring them out during sex."

"I didn't know you'd be okay with that."

"Want to see how you use them, give me some ideas for later. Plus it'd be like my own personal porn."

"Okay, I think I can do that."

Jake looks at me,

"What do you want to try?"

"I like the idea of some roleplay." He raises an eyebrow,

"What specifically?"

"Like the idea of us meeting up somewhere at a bar as strangers and you picking me up for a one night stand. Maybe fucking in the parking lot."

"I like that idea, we can definitely work that one out,"

The rain starts to come down harder, a dull roar on the roof.

You put your drink down on the table and take Jake's beer to join your glass. Your hands free you move to straddle Jake's strong thighs,

"All this talk of sex stuff has got me going, you want to check?"

Jake's hand slides down under your dress, up your thigh, and to your warm core. His jaw flexes the moment he realizes you forwent underwear. A strong finger ghosts over your clit causing you to gasp and slides into your wet opening.

"Fuck, El, you're soaked."

"Want to try out your idea?"

Jake nods enthusiastically,

"Yes, El, whatever you're comfortable with."

Slowly you stand up and pull Jake up with you. He follows you as you lead him by the hand to the bedroom. You pull the armchair that usually sits in the corner of the room to the foot of the bed and motion for him to sit. He complies and adjusts himself when he sits down, just the initial idea getting him excited and starting to tent his pants.

After arranging the pillows on the bed to your liking you pull out your trusty vibrator. The ridiculous pink and sparkly coloring a bit much in the muted daylight of the bedroom. The lube is fished out of the top drawer of your nightstand and placed on the bed next to the toy. Jake is watching you intently as you go through your preparations; finally you strip the dress you have on, letting it fall to the floor as you slide onto the bed naked.

"You okay, El?" Jake asks, soft concern on his face.

"I'm good, Jake. Enjoy the show," you respond. Leaning back into the pillows, you have your legs modestly together still, knees touching. You know that you wouldn't go through all these motions if it was just you, but that's the fun of the fantasy, everything is just a bit heightened, a bit more production value.

Making sure your supplies are within arms reach you start to caress yourself, long sweeps of your body and curves. Your hands glide over your breasts, down the slope of your stomach, to the outer and inner reaches of your thighs, but you don't touch your pussy yet.

The soothing touch entices you to close your eyes and just enjoy the sensations of skin on skin. On your next round your hands stop on your breasts, cupping them and rolling your nipples between your fingers gently. The action pulls a light moan out of you and for the first time since you started Jake speaks,

"El," he rasps, his voice thick, "Talk to me, tell me what you're thinking about, what you're imagining."

A slight flush creeps on your cheeks, somehow this feels so much more intimate than some of the things you done with Jake and you realize because he's really the first person you've ever let this far into your life, your mind, and your heart. You trust him with all of you, so you take a little settling breath and start to talk, with your hands squeezing your tits and nipples.

"I love how big your hands are, how they feel on me. How you can just cover big parts of my body with one hand, makes me feel protected."

You let one hand slide down to your apex and gently part your folds and your legs finally open to Jake's gaze. A deep groan resonates from the end of the bed when your legs fully part exposing your glistening cunt.

You tease around your pussy, letting your fingers dance on your lips as you hold them open with your other hand.

"The way you eat my pussy like it's your last meal drives me crazy. If it were up to me I'd keep you between my legs all the time. Under my desk at work, here in our bed, anywhere I could get you, because no one, no one, has ever eaten my pussy as good as you do Jake."

You finally give in and let your fingers slide over your clit and down into your wet slit. Gathering some of your slick on your fingers you rub small circles around your clit. A soft sigh of relief escapes from your lips as some of the ache eases with your motions. You take the opportunity to look at Jake and he has slipped his sweats and boxer briefs down releasing his dick. His hard cock is in his hand, precum leaking out the tip. His green eyes look dark and intense as they watch your every move.

Your mouth waters at the thought taking him in your mouth, you begin to speak again, your sex stream of consciousness if you will,

"Love your cock, Jake. The taste. I want it in me all the time, my mouth, my pussy. We should try cockwarming. Think about having me wrapped all around you while we do something, like watch a movie and see how long we can hold out being that close and connected to each other without fucking our brains out." The image of you just being with Jake, perched on his dick gets you going even more and your fingers begin to speed up on your clit. You decide it's time to get the vibrator involved. When you pull your hands away to get the toy and lube, Jake lets out a little whine of disappointment.

You apply some lube to the vibrator and click the cap shut before tossing it to the foot of the bed for Jake. Laying back you hear the click of the lube cap and know Jake has slicked himself up. You click the toy on, and tease it down your body to your pussy. Even then you don't go straight in, enjoying the pleasant vibrations on your clit and swirling it around your hole to heighten the anticipation some more.

"I need to get a bigger vibrator, this one feels small compared to you," you pant out as you tease yourself with the aforementioned toy. Jake huffs out a small laugh at your statement.

"I like how you stretch me when you first slide in," you try to say in a sultry voice as you slide the vibe in, slowly pumping it in and out. The sounds of Jake's breaths speed up.

The satisfaction of knowing how turned on he is spurs you to keep talking,

"I like to think of all the ways you've taken me, how we've fucked, Jake. I always love it when you push me up against a wall and just rail me," you can't help but let out a loud moan at the thought and memory,

"Going as deep as you can, can practically feel your dick in my throat and almost taste it."

A small "fuck me" rumbles from Jake's mouth and you continue to let the dirty talk spill out of your mouth.

"Or when you take me from behind, it lets you slap my ass how I like it. I love seeing your big hand prints on my ass."

With that last verbal volley, everything speeds up. You click the next level on the vibrator, pump it faster, and rub your clit harder on your quest to come undone.

The sounds of slicked up movement mixed with Jake's heavy breathing and muted grunts at the foot of the bed tell you he's getting closer to his own release. You hold your head up long enough to take in the sight of Jake, shirt discarded somewhere along the way, muscles tensed, eyes transfixed on your movements as he slides his hand up and down his cock.

Your own climax is building rapidly and you start to shout as you peak,

"So close, Jake,I'm coming, fuck yes, oh my god."

You finally break into that plane of bliss and the pleasure washes over you as you thrash about on the bed.

Chest heaving, you pull the vibrator out and turn it off. You collapse, boneless, into the softness of the bed.

The bed dips and Jake crawls up to kiss you. It is hard and messy, saliva and tongues as he keeps up his rhythm on his dick, slowly jerking it as he hovers above you.

"El, how you keep getting sexier and sexier I don't know, watching you get yourself off and knowing how much you think about me got me so fucking hard. Can't wait to fuck you after this," he pants against your lips.

You grasp his cock, displacing his hand, as you moan,

"I want you to come," you pause, "Come on me."

"Fuck, El."

You speed up your strokes on his dick, his eyes starting to screw shut as he focuses on you.

Jake lets out a deep moan as his

hands grasp and bunch the comforter on either side of your head.

"El, I'm going to come," he pants, his hips bucking into your hand.

"Want you to feel good. Come for me."

That is the magic set of words that pulls Jake's release from him, warm spurts of come land on your chest as a loud strangled grunt emits from Jake his head pulled back, veins bulging on his neck, chest heaving.

"Holy fuck, El," he groans out as he flops on his back next to you on the bed. He looks your way just in time to watch you drag a finger through the mess on your chest and bring it to your lips to clean.

He groans, almost painfully,

"You're going to kill me, El. Jacob Thomas Seresin dead by sex at age 33."

You laugh and stretch your neck over to him to catch his lips in a sweet kiss. "That was the one of the sexiest things I've ever seen," he says against your lips. You pull back enough to look Jake in the eyes.

"I'm glad you liked it."

He laughs,

"I loved it."

You find Jake's hand with your own and interweave your fingers together.

"I've never done that with anyone," you say into the space between you,

"I didn't really trust any guy enough to give them an all access pass to my brain and body.

Jake raises your intertwined hands and kisses your knuckles softly,

"I'm honored I'm the first and last man who gets this privilege."

You raise an eyebrow,

"The last?"

"Darling, I'm never letting you go."

"Ditto."

"I'm thinking we need to explore that porn shower of yours some more and clean you up," Jake says pulling you up.

"Sounds lovely, lead the way, Jake."

@mygyn

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[aerodaltonimperial]

katy's community poll-fic 2k24

part 1 | part 2

(The people have spoken. 24 hours. Not positive weekend updates will roll out, but we shall see, haha. They tend to be dodgy for me.)

Jack loses sight of Hook when the other rounds a corner and hops into a stairwell, moving with speed Jack generally only sees in the ring. Whatever. Bowens offered up an additional option that Jack hadn’t thought of: the Undisputed Kingdom. They are pretty much the biggest assholes on the roster right now, so maybe the best idea is to interrogate them first and then start working down the rest of the list. Either Hook is heading elsewhere, or he didn’t make note of where the locker rooms are; Jack starts down the opposite hall. He remembers where the paper was taped. Mostly, he remembers because staff always has to put them near one of the wheelchair ramps now, and those end up on the main floor. In fact, the door is positioned right at the top of one leading down to a set of double doors leading outside.

He pauses outside the door, UNDISPUTED KINGDOM stuck up against the polish, hand halfway into a knock. Is this a bad idea? These dicks literally shoved Hanger against a windshield just because his name came up as a possibility. Jack’s not really sure he wants to be the next target, especially not just for Max Caster and his terrible theatrical wails.

Well. He’s come too far now—might as well see this through. Jack knocks on the door, which is opened after a few minutes, and Matt Taven stares at him, eyes narrowed.

“We didn’t place any orders for douchebag twinks,” he says.

“Bummer, I come highly recommended,” Jack replies. “In the absence of that, you got any trios title belts hidden away in there with you?”

“Any what?” Taven parrots. But he does open the door a little wider, so Jack can see the rest of them milling inside. Roddy is on the couch, and Mike is on one of the metal chairs. Adam, of course, is in his wheelchair, with his little black boot held aloft on the kickstand.

Jack can’t immediately see Max’s belt anywhere on the floor, but that certainly doesn’t mean it isn’t here.

“The fuck is this guy doing here?” Mike asks, seemingly to the rest of the room instead of Jack, even though he’s looking right at Jack, like a tool.

“Something about a trios belt,” Taven says.

Jack sighs. “Yeah, do you have it?”

Adam sits back, tenting his fingers in front of him. He looks like he’s trying to channel an evil villain of some kind, but really, the image is ruined by the whole bootie thing. “Are you saying that there’s a title belt missing? And you came here to ask us because…?”

“This seems to be one of the places that wayward items make their way to,” Jack says.

Adam’s eyebrows arch. “Is it?”

“Cut the shit,” Jack says. “Did you take it or not?”

“Why would we want some chump’s title belt?” Mike asks.

“You literally took the ROH tag belts back while wearing ski masks,” Jack points out. “You are a little obsessed with obtaining championships at present.” Then he pauses. “Also, where’s the giraffe?”

Roddy stares at him. The caterpillar above his lip trembles a little bit with the force of his frown. “What?”

“Y’know, the giraffe,” Jack repeats. “Did you keep it? Toss it? Ritually dismember it when you didn’t need it anymore? Also, why did you choose a giraffe?”

“Are you shitting me right now?” Taven asks.

“Did you choose a giraffe because you thought it made you seem non-threatening?” Jack continues. “Like, this whole herbivore thing?”

Roddy groans. “Can someone make him stop talking and go away?”

“Answer the question, and I’ll get out of your 80s bad cop facial hair,” Jack tells him.

“We don’t have a trios belt,” Taven says, with a smile that definitely does not meet his eyes. “Now scram, and let the adults get back to winning.”

“Fine,” Jack says, grumbling. He won’t get anything more out of these fucks when they’ve decided to be the biggest douchebags possible. He turns and starts back towards the hall, pausing only when he hears a “Hey!” called out from behind him.

He pauses. Twists on one heel to watch Adam wheel himself out into the hallway, injured foot bumping in time with squeezing through the doorway. Clearly, this establishment is only barely ADA-compliant, but whatever.

Adam sits back in the chair, tapping his fingers on the armrest a few times. Jack finally spots the poor giraffe taped to the underside of the seat like some sort of sacrifice. Adam gives Jack a once-over, and then says, “You have no finesse and lack all sense of dramatic tension, but you’re a lot more like me than I would have thought a year ago.”

“Excuse me?” Jack asks.

“I have a proposition for you,” Adam says.

[x-honeycomb-x]

Your ftmtf mother is here - Intro

Wants to detransition for the kink, and need some guidance and encouragement? Here I am. I would break the journey into different chapters, and you can always share your progress with me for show-and-tell!

I would keep it old-xhoneycombx style, wholesome, neurodivergent-friendly, genderfluidity-friendly, asexuality-friendly, and hopefully anti-capitalism/consumerism-conscious.

So firstly, welcome daughters! Fucking around with gender is absolutely okay. But unlike most detrans and misgender kink content, I don't like force-play. Instead I'd like to offer some encouragement and acceptance.

I have heard stories about ftms experimenting with/reclaiming femininity for months or years, before returning to being masculine, and I think I am going through a similar process. I've since tried so many different interesting things (that includes voguing in a ballroom!), and I even found out I'm non-binary.

It can feel scary - what if I find out I'm actually not trans? What if I'm too traumatized to feel comfortable in my girl mode? What if my friends and family know? What if it makes me non-binary?

I had all of those thoughts! And may I just say that your safety is the most important thing. If you might trigger your transphobic parents, be safe. If you might trigger an episode and spiral, don't do it without a therapist. I trust that you are smart and capable of making good judgements. <3

But to address those fears, one thing I found in this journey is, that I am me no matter what vessels I put myself in. I've challenged myself, my identities and how I experience myself, and in the end I find myself feeling like me, I transcend all different labels and conditions, and I found a lot of genderless moments where I just am.

Your inner girl is calling you, I'd say why not give her a listen if you are curious?

First task incoming. Let's make space for your girl to think and be:

Prepare a notebook for her

Is there another (feminine optional) name you would like?

What pronouns you wanna explore with (in or out of kink)? It can be a mix with she/they/he/neo-pronouns

Write your name and pronouns on the first page. You can always come back and change it.

Bring her a comforting hoodie

Bring her a stuffed toy you can be a girl around with

Find her a bag and/or a basket that she can put her things in

If you've already been experimenting with detrans kink, you might have more supplies, bring them with you too.

Bring your feminine bras and underwear

Bring your feminine clothes

Bring your sex toys and kink toys

Bring your makeup, if you don't already have a makeup bag/basket, bring one and put them in

Bring your feminine accessories

Write down a list of people she's in contact with (like sext friends) and put it in your notebook

(I would really enjoy a dollar store trip for this task. A notebook, a few baskets, a plush, and maybe some snacks) (But you find most things at home.) (But buying new ones helps if you have too much associations with the old items, or you just like shopping for your girl)

Task 2, some organization would help clear your mind. If you have makeup, put them in a makeup bag/box. If you have feminine clothes and underwear, save a cabinet for them, or at least a basket. If you have sex toys, put them in a big pouch. If you have accessories, get an accessories box. Now that you're being in touch with your femininity, put your supplies in a bag (your notebook, hoodie, stuff toy, and anything you might actively use). My best advice is, put everything above in your girl cabinet, makeup and accessories on your desk, and your bag next to your bed/desk.

What I really want you to accomplish here is that, your inner girl deserves to take up space. She deserves to find the things she's looking for, she deserves a space in your life. She deserves the order so she can have space to think.

Task 3. I want you to put on your hoodie, and/or your bra and underwear, and/or your feminine clothes, and just cuddle your stuffed friend, and lay in bed. Hug it out.

You might get really horny at this point. Go for it, enjoy yourself, make it count. maybe you’re already soaking. Keep it natural by just sticking your fingers in, and really feel them going in and out. Spread your juices on your clit and rub it nicely. Cum on your own hand.

Fap or not, when you've finished and am ready, I want you(-r inner girl) to hug your plush, just hug, and think about how it's okay to be a girl.

It's okay to be a girl. You don't have to be one. You also don't have to be a binary girl, or a full-time girl. You can be sometimes a girl. Main point is, you don't have to be a girl, but it's okay to be a girl. I want you to hug and think about that idea.

(And if you want to, think about "I am a girl", and just be content with it and hug your stuffed friend. Introduce this side of yourself to it if you are ready.)

It goes without saying, if you have any thoughts, put them in your notebook. I hope your girl feels safe, and I look forward to doing more stuff with her/you next time. I hope it has been an okay/interesting/pleasant experience.

You can also inbox me your thoughts! I might not have the capacity to reply to DMs or long messages, but I definitely reads my Asks and reposts. Let me know your thoughts!

[spawnofdeath]

As promised, since the overwhelming majority voted for wanting to see it, here is my Empires AU main post with all my current notes and thoughts:

Two Sons of Rivendell

(Title borrowed from the poem written for the ending of Empires season 1 by the wonderful @fishy-strawberries on their art blog floweroflaurelin)

AKA me realizing there's two plot relevant reveals of two characters being siblings in Empires 1 and thinking what if I switched them, so Scott and Xornoth get "Hold on now, we're siblings? How did we forget that?" And Lizzie gets "Wait, the demon is my brother?"

Summary:

Scott and Xornoth, rulers of neighboring elven kingdoms Rivendell and Erewyn, rediscover the tales of their people's old gods, Aeor and Exor. What memories have they lost along with the connection to their past?

Meanwhile, in the nearby Grimlands, salmon loving engineer fWhip starts having troubles involving a demonic cod creature. Who is this malicious stranger, and is he connected to Ocean Queen Lizzie?

In no particular order, some notes:

There aren't really just straight forward role swaps exclusively between two characters each, it's all a bit all over the place

I only watched six out of twelve perspectives (Jimmy, Joel, Lizzie, Pearl, Scott and Sausage) so I don't know if I'm missing anything but also it's not meant to be canon-compliant (but also means I don't know how to write the other characters)

This AU is fully falling into the trend of making fanon Jimmy much cooler than he is in canon, but I just think he deserves a proper villain arc (not counting the one he thoroughly failed at in season 2)

Actual story notes:

Xornoth identifies and presents as broadly male-adjacent, and uses he/they

Because there's no possible pun on "siblings" that could work as well as "Seablings" for the purposes of this AU, Scott and Xornoth will be collectively known as "The Twin Kings"

Xornoth's Empire Erewyn (name might be subject to change) is slightly down the mountainside from Rivendell, where it's a bit warmer than on the snow covered peaks (even without their gods, Scott prefers the winter and Xornoth the summer), and has shared borders with Rivendell, Crystal Cliffs, and the Lost Empire (small parts taken off each of those three, but mostly extends into the spawn area, I looked up a map for this so hopefully you get what I mean)

Erewyn exports enchanted books and offers services of custom enchanting for armour and weapons

The Ocean Queen, of course, cherishes all Ocean dwellers, which certainly includes, for most of their life cycle, salmon

Featuring Scott both as one of the Lost Siblings pair and as the guy who falls in love with the demon

Those two plot lines actually might interfere with each other, I cannot imagine Xornoth would be very fond of the idea of his friend/brother trying to date a demon and Scott probably wouldn't take it very well if Xornoth tried to talk him out of it, so it might put a strain on their friendship, but I don't care, it can't be anyone but Scott, I can't make it work with anyone but Scott (the only other option I can think of would be Sausage, and he's already allied with the demon in canon, I don't want him to be in this AU as well)

I'm gonna say Jimmy is also at least somewhat interested in Scott, because, well, he is kind of cute, for someone without any fins or scales, and why not? Some fun on the side, why shouldn't he? There should be more to life than just terrorising people, even for a demon

Farmer (and Fighter) Queen Pearl is far too exited about her new demonic sparring partner and the powers he's willing to share (just to make their matches more interesting, right? This surely won't corrupt her, nooo, how would it?) (Unlike with Sausage, here I actually do like the idea of Pearl still being in a somewhat similar to canon role, except cranked up to eleven to become the role of demon protégé)

Pearl is also involved in this AU's equivalent of the hostage exchange, the other side being Xornoth (Pearl started it by stealing one of Xornoth's owls, but I cannot think of who or what they would have taken from her in return)

Pix as the assassin in that storyline, I think, because it's really funny to me to think that the person who in canon is tracking people's deaths in this AU is causing people's deaths

Lady Katherine of House Blossom, Flower Mage Queen of the Overgrown, tends to what is known as the Memorial Garden

Lord Sausage of Mythland really just wants to be friends with everyone and is always advocating for peace

Xornoth and Shrub have this AU's equivalent of the Cod War (what would that be though? I'd appreciate any ideas)

Joey and Xornoth are the happy couple who had the big royal wedding, with Scott as Xornoth's best man, and officiated by Pearl

Joey also gets the role of the one who's in complete denial of anything demonic going on. Joey cares about two things, his beautiful builds and his beautiful husband, and that's it. Demon? What demon? There's no demon, why would there be a demon? The sudden surplus of cod make good food for the raptors, as such their unusual aggression goes almost entirely unnoticed, piles of slime are buried under dirt to form nice rounded little hills. He can't even see Jimmy during the big arena fight, just Pearl going mad for no apparent reason, like, what's up with her then? (Keep in mind that I have never in my life watched any of Joey's videos, I have not the first clue how to write him)

Who did Pearl build the arena with, by the way? Probably Gem, who starts out being somewhat complacent about the whole demon issue ("Oh I'm sure he's not that dangerous, he's hardly managed to hurt me, and anyways, he's got some very interesting abilities I'd love to study"), but after the big massacre finally realizes it's actually quite serious and also Pearl is clearly not herself and definitely needs help

Random thought, you know how manta rays swim like they're flying through the water? Jimmy flies like he's swimming through the air

Jimmy is short for Jimahinjao, although he doesn't go by that name anymore, and definitely only Scott is allowed to call him Jimmy

Lizzie is short for Lizmoa, which is already one of the shortest merfolk names, but she's always gone by Lizzie, except in situations calling for truly formal adress

I don't know if "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue" would necessarily apply to a gay wedding, but I kind of want it to in this case because:

I imagine Scott and Xornoth would have similar styles in terms of clothing and accessories, because it's a traditional elven style or because they're unknowingly brothers, who knows. The point here is Joey coming to Scott for 'something borrowed' and Scott going "Ohhh I can make your outfits match, that's gonna be so cute!"

Thus, the four items: an enchanted golden apple found with the help of Joel (because I didn't know what else he could provide), a pendant made of pixandrian copper (paralleling my interpretation of the amethyst Lizzie got from Gem as a necklace), an elven crown borrowed from Scott (matching Xornoth's), and a bouquet of blue orchids from the swamp outside of Mythland (paralleling the fact that in canon, the warped fungus came from the same place as the corruption)

Speaking of the swamp outside of Mythland, it is regarded as a dangerous and possibly haunted place and thus uninhabited (except for Jimmy, who is the reason people think it's haunted)

The crown Scott receives from Jimmy is a flower crown (as a nod to the for this AU rather unfitting official ship name of "Flower Husbands"). It's made from water lilies and has, beyond the mind control, two rather obvious magical properties. One: it doesn't wilt. Two: it's always slightly dripping. Mostly water, sometimes mud, rarely a bit of slime, but it's always dripping something. Scott still wears it anyways

Lizzie and Katherine get kidnapped by Pearl and Scott, and rescued by Joel, prompting that particular romance

As it will eventually turn out, Scott and Xornoth are twins (Xornoth being older by an hour, though there's no real way for them to find it out that exactly)

Xornoth reads in the library about an artifact he's pretty sure is related to the old religion he and Scott are continuing to learn about. The artifact in question is a black iron crown in the shape of a pair of antlers, to be worn by the royal representative of one of the two gods. They resolve to find this artifact.

Meanwhile, Lizzie, in a treasure chest she unearthed, finds what she thinks is probably an interestingly shaped piece of scrap metal. Maybe she can trade it to some fool for something else. Maybe for a channeling trident. She's been wanting one of those. Calling lightning at will sounds amazing.

The Crown™ is still forged by fWhip, and makes the rounds from Joel, who gets killed for it by Lizzie, who, while trying to give it to Shrub, gets it yoinked away by Joey, who gives it away via a treasure hunt which is then won by Xornoth, who gets it stolen by Gem, who creates a quiz for it that's won by fWhip, who gives it to Sausage, who puts on a contest in which Shrub then cheats and kills him to get it

The Ocean Queen gets storm powers that she needs to learn to control, she probably strikes Katherine with lightning by accident and subsequently flees to a deserted island to not hurt anyone else

While Lizzie is gone, fWhip steals the nautilus shell "Jimmy" has been sealed in, prompting her to return when one of her axolotls comes to tell her about it

More notes to possibly come in the future via reblogs

[fangaminghell]

( @valkyrie-of-the-rising-sun )

A hopefully quick debrief of the very self indulgent Supernatural Au!!!

How it started: I literally was just thinking about Sasha, and if he was a mermaid. Literally couldn't stop thinking about it, bc Sasha already is so fun to think about, but him as a man eating mermaid? Impossible to ignore.

What came after: I don't remember the exact events that lead to it, but at some point 1) I started to imagine what my other ocs would be like as monsters and 2) my friend Rowan ( @eclysia ) added Asfrith to the table ( bc at this point, Asfrith being tied to Sasha or ( especially) Isador was always a given, hehe) as a researcher of sorts of monsters. He uh. Was almost drowned by Sasha before Sasha thought it would be very funny to let him live. And thus started....whatever they got going on. Because Isador is Devil in Paragon, I thought it'd make sense if the twins were both demons in this au, and by proxy, Flynn. I could go into deeper detail but the main gist is that things Expanded than just " omg Mermaid Sasha he's so hot".

How's it going: While the world building is super set in stone, I'm honestly having fun here lol. Au's are great for showing sides of characters that aren't usually shown in canon. The post about Teddy is a big example.

I know this was supposed to be short but lemme breakdown the characters so far reaaaal quick:

Sasha: Mermaid. Favorites past time is sinking ships, eating humans, and looking amazing. Is currently having fun with his new little play thang ( Asfrith). Was planning on killing him when he finally gets bored but uh. Maybe not?

Isador: One half of the Arkwright Twins, he's still a grumpy bitch, but when business calls, he knows how to put on a performance~ Got connected to Asfrith when he summoned the two for a deal. Instead of taking Asfrith's soul like Isador wanted, Teddy instead offered to look after their cousin Flynn, hence, the two becoming more connected than Isador thought would be necessary.

Teddy: The other half of the Arkwright Twins, and is usually considered the friendly options. It doesn't help that he looks more angelic compared to his brother: no he's not half angel, he just looks like that. Great for business, easier to lure people into a false sense of security- Ahem. A sweetheart who can and will go on a rampage if you dare hurt his family. May or may not be a bit of gremlin. Who's to say ( Isador. Isador is to say)

Flynn: The twins younger cousin, a kitsune that is often in disguise in the village where this whole thing is taking place. She's terribly shy, and has low self confidence, much preferring to be away from the attention. Her parents believe they have power over the village - they don't - and often pester Flynn to do something in order to increase their- I mean her status. Really, her only solis her cousins, and bc of their business they tend to be too busy to visit. It's a lonely life, but she's fine....at least, she think she is until two humans(?) show up in her life

Imani: The only human of my ocs so far! Well not really, but I'll explain that later. Her story isn't fully fleshed out, but she's Asfrith self appointed assistant! She happens to hang out with monsters more often than not, even getting along with those she really really shouldn't be! But it's okay, more friends means a greater time!

Arrow: I'm still not sure but I'm working on it I swear! Maybe a harpy, but still gotta think about it.

Other ocs: So, this au is actually a build up on the old mermaid au I had featuring Leo and the reborn gang. Given how I didn't exactly want to get rid of it, I just decided that the old au and this au are the same thing, with different things happening to different people. They don't all have to know each other, these stories are, for the most part, separate but within the same time and place, basically. Aaaand. Yeah!

This was not short at all! Lmao. Hoped it was decent context though. Probably not, since it. Doesn't fully explain Teddy. Ah well.

[outisgivingpac]

Pick-a-Card: Focus, Release, Continue

Hello everyone, I'm back to deliver another PAC reading. This is a spread that I use a lot for myself during turbulent times to organize my headspace. So I thought, it would be nice to share it with the community ☺️☀️✨

This spread consists of three cards, aligning with three questions:

1. Focus - what are you invited to pay more attention to at the moment?

2. Release - what is something you should let go of/release from your mind?

3. Continue - what is something you have been doing well?

I'm not exactly satisfied with how the PAC turned out in the end but, I decided to kick the perfectionist side in the butt and post it anyways 😅 If you enjoyed my PAC in anyways, please support me by likes/reblog this post and feel free to let me know your thoughts 💖 I also offer paid reading, so do check out my pinned post.

My PAC masterlist

✨Choose the pile/pic you are most drawn to ✨

Pile 1. Pile 2. Pile 3.

Pile 1: 8oW, 6oS Rx, 3oS Rx

For those who picked pile 1, it's time to focus on your aspiration and make your wants and needs into your reality. You might find yourself in a transitional period at the moment. For example, you're moving to a new place for your study or work, or this shift could be internally when you're about to enter a new phase in your life. So do invest your energy on yourself, for my pile 1 seems to have the people-pleaser tendency. Meaning, you might feel the need to make sure everyone around you are well taken care of and content, before you even begin to allow yourself to be happy and successful. It could stem from guilt or a past wound where others deem you self-fish and greedy for wanting more for yourself in life, for having boundaries like a normal person. Anyways, it's time for you to stop looking around for other's opinion, validation and need, and start giving it to yourself. After all, you cannot give to people you genuinely care for in life when your own basket is empty. Lastly, it seemw you have been doing well healing your old wounds. Hurtful words that you used to replay hundreds of time in your head slowly become the background noise before disappearing into oblivion. So keep up the good spirits. In no time, you will be able to look back the hill or depth you climbed out of and say proudly, "I have made it through".

Pile 2: The Hierophant, KnoC, Justice

For those who picked pile 2, there seem to be some big decisions to be made. During this time, you're encouraged to discern your personal belief: what is your personal truth, and what are values you inherited from your family, your teachers and your peers. You are well aware of the ideals and standards that are considered the norm in the society, but you could have internalized them so deeply that your own desire and your voice have become blurry in comparison. If I have to give an example, a student picked IT as their major in college, based on the fact that it's a rapidly developing field and has a high job security after graduation. So they got in, but the longer they stay, the more obvious it becomes to them that they hate the subject for dear life, which is their personal truth. That being said, it's not a black and white matter. One just need to put themselves in consideration, to *know thyself*, in order to make practical and well-informed steps. Don't give the power to make decisions to others by indulging in escapism/dissociation. Others can present you options filtered through tinted-glasses that is their bias. Continue to investigate for yourself to see your situation as it is, not the idealized nor the denigrated version of it.

Pile 3: Judgment, 5oP Rx, AoW

For those who picked this pile, I sense that you have just stepped out of a big cycle, a difficult time or a commitment that has kept you busy for a long while. You might find yourself feeling a bit lost amid the "newfound freedom" or the luxury of having normal days in which nothing much happens comparing to when you were in survival mode. During this time, you're invited to take time and have some self-reflection. Look back on your journey and see how far you have come, celebrate your achievements and counts the little blessings and wisdom you have accumulated along the way. After all, only you know your struggle the best, and only you can give yourself the validation that leads to your true satisfaction and happiness. On the other hands, some of you needs to stop being so harsh on yourself and forgive your past mistake. It's nothing like blaming bad things that happened on the surrounding or other people, but to forvige yourself for not knowing better. For reacting and making mistakes like all human could. Everyone shall strive to make the best out of what they have at a time, so don't let the ghost of the past haunt your present and dictate your choices in life. On a brighter note, many sparks of ideas have been popping in your mind during this peaceful period. You're much encouraged to explore and brainstorm them. Don't feel the pressure to make something polished and prompt out of it, you can try out things just for fun too.

Source for the paintings I use:

1. Digital 6 by Judith Bergerson

2. Strict Composition by Berit Mogensen Lopez

3. Yellow Flower by Catherine Jeltes

[karla-the-elemental-dreamer]

Man I have been through so much in the etheric realms in the last few days [/nights]. Wasn't sure whether to share or not; but with 18-Volt all-of-a-sudden seeming to come back, and some nasty energetic truths about Jak's situation, I thought these insights were worth being put up. This stems from Jak missing for days or even weeks, and the episodes getting increasingly worse. They are divided into 2 parts: Part 1 is the conversation that 18-Volt had with me, in which Terra monitored/supervised it at 18-Volt's request. Part 2 is where my teddy group (OCs) called a meeting, and Riku was kind enough to attend as well.

--------------------------------------

PART 1: 18-VOLT'S CONVERSATION (+Terra)

18-Volt (ESFP): "Hey, so on my little scouting sesh, I found out a few things about Jak, and they're not good".

Me: "You're not undermining him, are you?"

18-Volt: "Naw; not at all. See I've become casual buddies with Terra and agreed to let him have me on a leash a bit; that's why he's watchin' me talk to you. How else am I supposed to come back and help if people don't trust me?".

Me: "So then you may have something valuable to offer me about Jak, especially since you were giving me a massive amount of downloads while I was washing stuff earlier today".

18-Volt: "Yeah... You see, Jak might actually be quite sick, and you chasing after him this time is unhealthy, because you're gonna get poisoned yourself".

Me: "I've actually felt that poisoning since yesterday. What's going on?".

18-Volt: "Choice point for timelines is almost up; and you're dead on about Jak taking the lower one".

Me: "Ah shoot".

18-Volt: "My advice? Tack on that 50k cash grab now and ONLY reverse it if he makes a strong comeback. Even a medium one ain't good enough. That ABTD needs to truly show that it's not gonna glitch ya again, otherwise what's the point?".

Me: "You have a point there. The ABTD only started taking me seriously after I tacked on the $45,000 one and gave it the option for reversals".

18-Volt: "Uh huh! But whatever you do, you can't descend in order to clean out messes anymore. Because you've got an energy that behaves like the Wario-bug, that's eating up all the lower timelines. And you don't wanna be in its way".

Me: "Dammit".

18-Volt: "Not all's lost yet, okay? You could have an 18-Volt 2.0 moment where Jak wakes up and rushes back to you. But you can't get your hands dirty anymore; he has to come to you. Just like I said, go slam dunk that cash grab [50k] and work with the fallout of that. But you need to stay on the upper rungs with Terra because that man really loves you to the moon and back".

Me: "Okay, so I've just now applied the $50,000 penalty, as well as an additional $15,000 due to the promise of lassoing the ABTD if two of Jak's friends weren't able to come with him. 50k for him, and 7.5k for them".

18-Volt: "See? You're a champ! You've got a lotta love for everyone you meet. But Jak's gotta see that AND put it into practice. Because at the moment, you're asking daddy [Jak] to go to your school concerts and visit your art fairs, but he couldn't give a shit and just stays home being all miserable, making his daughter cry because he doesn't want tah support her in anything".

Me: "You put it in a harsh, but clear and honest perspective".

18-Volt: "Because also think about it this way. Who's been doing most of your rescue aids? Every time Jak's in trouble, Kingdom Hearts always rushes to your side. But when it's been the opposite, Jak does the bare minimum, if anything. Don't 'cha see that he's the one not wanting to connect with other worlds? Don't let him short-change you anymore. You've gotta leave him be until he chooses to come back or gets the shock of his life. And I know what you're thinking. You were supposed to have three at a time protecting you. I don't wanna steal Jak's thunder, but I'll take up the third slot, and I'll gladly give it back to him if he shows up for it".

-------------------------------------

PART 2: MEETING BETWEEN THE TEDDIES (+Riku)

The name 'The Mistress' is used quite a lot in this section, this is what the teddies always called me when I was little, and it's like saying The Princess.

Chloe-Nurse (?): "What's going on!? Why are we all meeting here?"

Selvian (INFJ): Sam saw something that no one has ever seen before".

Chloe-Nurse (?): "And?".

Selvian (INFJ): "She saw Jak crying in his room, which is something he hasn't even done since his father died. And... Uhh...".

Riku (DG - ISFP): "Looks like we're getting an energy interruption. Almost like someone doesn't want him on the higher timeline".

Nadia (ISTJ): "I question that 18-Volt guy ever since he's come back. Why does he have such an interest in Jak? I've heard not too good things about him [18V] in the past".

Riku (DG - ISFP): "With what Terra reported back, it seems like he just gets angry at anyone who tries to hurt Karla, and I've seen him do that before, with other people before, including myself actually. It seems the Warioware group already have knowledge on the situation as Jimmy T., Kat and Ana, and Ashley filled shortly the last time our abilities were compromised. So 18-Volt's just being a bit passionate in flipping his lid at Jak about the whole drama. But Dreamy WB [she] and myself are keeping a close eye on him".

Niki (ENFJ): "I actually think that if it wasn't for 18-Volt, Jak wouldn't even flinch at what's going on. Jak's crying because something must have hit a raw nerve, whether it's 18-Volt, or maybe he [Jak] saw the mistress striking down that $50,000 penalty today".

Mabo (INFP): "The ABTD's trying to stop her [me], but Jak is still seeking help in the background".

Riku (DG - ISFP): "Exactly".

Chloe-Fashion (?): "See? It's 18-Volt that's making Jak fight for his life [in a good way]. But how exactly is he [Jak] getting help?

Selvian (INFJ): "Jak has asked to see Josephine [INFJ] for regular counselling, and their first session I think was two days ago... Or was it yesterday?".

Chloe-Fashion (?): "She's [me] still poisoned though. How is it possible for the mistress to even get back to him, yet alone recover from this?".

Sabrina (ESTJ): "18-Volt actually said that it's still possible, but that it won't be easy".

Selvian (INFJ): "18-Volt's right. This is yet another battle, but this time with some bridges that must never be crossed; which is why the mistress must stay out of this. While Riku and Terra protect her, we need our strongest men and women in Haven City, which means Sabrina and I will be going for a few weeks obviously with Simona and Sam alone having no luck. Josephine takes over admin duties at home while Angela becomes the second tutor".

Samantha/Sam (INFP): "What about Kingdom Hearts?"

Selvian (INFJ): "Kingdom Hearts has shown that they can look after themselves, especially by Riku being here at this meeting. Sierra will stay behind with them, and work with Terra's girls, Nasha and Sibella. But Sabrina and I need to get to the bottom of this evil still lurking in Haven City, and we need to make sure Jak continues to see Joesphine on a regular basis until his problem is sorted out. It is likely that we won't be coming back without Jak".

Sam (INFP): "So you'll be stuck there forever?"

Nasha (ESFP): "What 'chu worrying about anyway, Samantha? You're one of Jak's original girls, so you can go there any time".

Riku (DG - ISFP): "I think she's more worried about Selv and Sabrina's safety and you guys getting to see each other again as a whole group".

Nasha (ESFP): "And why do you have to do this anyhow? Wasn't it over once the mistress shoved that 65 grand fine up the ABTD's ass?".

Selvian (INFJ): "She only did that as a last measure in-case the ABTD is stupid enough to never give him back. The $65,000 is a cap for if worldly events become too stressful and intense that she, or any of us, have no hope of getting him back. But until the very last day, we never ever give up. And until then, there is always a chance for the penalty to be reversed, whether partially or fully. Now no one tell her this, but we're gonna try as hard as we can to get him back for Christmas".

------------------------------------

I've never assigned or known the personality for any of the Chloe's.

For the nurse, I'm thinking ESTP. And for the fashion stylist, I'm thinking ENFP like Sierra.

[lamentingocean]

SEAGULL X GUN.

"Ready...aim..and THRUST!"

seagull put in wind power in a spear move. Sweat emerged from his head. It was almost nighttime. it took all day to train with gun for an upcoming mission assigned in the deep voice of the master of black rabbit, gun clapped his hand.

"Ok, that's it for today, for doing a good job, following my movements, and following my training process as well, i will treat you to dinner today..it's all on me."

His palm reached to his forehead, the sweat slightly coating a part of his palm, but he was hungry and sore at the same time.

"Ahh. thank you gun, where are we going to eat at? Order some food in the golden Jade palace or a restaurant?"

the spear was put down in the weapons rack, a small towel scrubbed into seagull's face.

"Hmm... maybe a restaurant, we can go to the plum blossom pavilion or go get some noodles."

Gun closed the gates to black rabbit, I didn't take a while to go back to ilyang. Seagull thought about a lot of stuff about gun, how he was assigned to train you, how he treats you to a restaurant at first, and how he's a kind person that is a real one that protects his men, and the one that seen the real power of the errand boy that turned into a master. it shook him once they got to ilyang. it seems to be a event going on.

"Gun, ilyang seems to be crowded. What's going on?"

a slight look of blush took over his handsome face.

"ehm..it wasn't a treat, but I been stuck on the time to train you on whatever mission that crazy bastard gave us, so I found a event step up here this morning so I took up on the offer to take you there to spend time for you.."

a grin stuck to his face, his straightforward words took up to heart, chinese music played in the event.

Korean food smelt in the air of ilyang, the beauty of women kissed the men around the event, dango, traditional dancing, and a perfect chance to get some food. his voice spoke up at this.

"So seagull. where do you want to eat first?"

"Hmm... there is a chinese restaurant here so we can do that."

the doors opened to an open attire to the event. It was mainly red and orange. gun payed for the food.

"what do you want to order?"

there was a menu of many options, many options for food to eat, and definitely spring rolls too.

"Wonton soup."

"Coming right up sir♡"

an awkward silence. Once food was being made in the kitchen of this restaurant, gun spoke up first to shatter the silence like a fresh mirror.

"I wanted to thank you. For devoting yourself to getting stronger and trying your best to remain in rank of black rabbit, I trained you strong enough to go up against the heavenly generals in a 5v1. but it isn't just training too."

"Hm? What do you mean??"

"What I mean.. I mean that it's unfair that I kept my true feelings from you because I'm afraid it was jeopardized in our training cycle.."

their food came in before Seagull could say a word.

"No no..it's ok to express what you need to say towards me. and what feelings?"

His face almost turned pink.

"it's feelings of.....what I'm trying to say is that I had a liking to you all this time... even if it means ignoring and cussing out people who don't support the IGBT and people who don't appreciate others being happy with their sexuality."

a warm laughter spilled out of seagull's voice.

"mhm..so are you saying you want to be in a relationship with me..?"

He nodded with his adorable face, filling his face with some Chinese chicken.

"Let's speak about it more after dinner. ok?"

It was 2 hours later, and the event was still railing the streets of ilyang with the music. they walked back to black rabbit, they didn't say a word to each other for the walk back to the clan.

"Thank you for taking me out for dinner, gun. I really appreciate it♡'

his warm hand went to his cheek, facing his brown eyes, his lips crashed into seagull. he pulled away, covering his mouth out of embarrassment.

"Yes..I do want to be in a relationship with you so.."

(Sorry, it's short, but hopefully, it's good enough)

[whatisshelties]

Do people even like to read my thoughts on future dogs?

I got to hold shelties for breeders at the show this last weekend and the breeder I met the other month was there to introduce me to a few people. She got busy helping with dogs after awhile, so that didn't last super long, but at least it's a start. I also was able to tell people I'd been to the fb video call meeting for the sheltie club this week and some people remembered because I have the profile picture that is Not A Sheltie.

So I'm slowly getting out there. I have one more meeting before I can submit my application, then they do a home check (to make sure I'm not a hoarder, lol). They're starting to offer agility trials again, so I'm going to try to at least volunteer, if not get Mud fit enough to run. (Depending on his health.)

Anyway, yesterday had me pining for another sheltie. The more I connect and research, it seems like the area has a surplus of shelties. I shouldn't have a problem getting a puppy after getting on a list or getting a young adult that didn't work out for show. I've gotten the impression it could take years to build relationships and get a dog. Not so sure about that now.

That said, I'm hoping to get to know dogs and breeders better, so I can get paired with the right dog. I saw dogs with personalities I liked this weekend and others that looked worried just walking into the building. I need to get to more shows just to watch.

All this to say that I'm considering releasing my hold on the rescue mini aussie mix and just waiting for a sheltie. My current situation will put me back up to 3 dogs again if I get another dog, when I only wanted 2, so I had the option to get a 3rd down the line. The gap between next dog and next next dog will need to be bigger than I was thinking it might be earlier this year because I can't do 4 dogs. I had been thinking I'd get the rescue "now", and in fewer years than I tend to wait (basically less than 7 yrs), get another dog, likely a sheltie, though possibly a whippet. That order would depend on how agility apt the rescue was. (If rescue was good/stayed sound lmfao, would consider a whippet after that dog since agility feels like less of a sure shot than a sheltie.)

Now that I can only get one more dog until Mud and/or Anza passes away, I think I need to be more picky. :( Mud's mom is pushing 14, so barring any serious health issues, Mud has potential to reach 14. That means I could be waiting 7 years again, if I get another dog next year. And ngl, I have considered blowing it all off until Mud and Anza are decrepit because they're like...a single unit. They are simultaneously easy (they get along well) and difficult because their brain function drops by half when they are together. It's ridiculous.

I'm not going to make a decision quite yet. It sounds like the training videos the rescue is being feature in might be coming out soon, so I'd like to see those before I decline. She may be flipping amazing and I decide to blow off the sheltie.

Another factor is money. I need to replenish my savings that have been depleted over 18 months of being unemployed with minimal art income. I feel like I'd be better off taking a year or so to do that vs taking on a dog at the beginning of the year. (Rescue offered to hold dog as long as needed, which includes years, but I don't want to do that.)

[cindylouwho-2]

RECENT NEWS, RESOURCES AND STUDIES, Etsy & Google, early June 2023

Since I have been writing so much in detail about Etsy happenings lately, I didn’t have time to write my usual news summaries. Better late than never, here is what has been happening on Etsy and in the SEO world in general for the past few months. 

The bad news is I am on a 2-week road trip as of June 14th, so you may not get the rest of the ecommerce, social media and other news until into July, but I will do my best to get some work done in the car each day without an internet connection. 

Don't forget you can always follow me on Twitter or on LinkedIn to get more timely updates.  

TOP NEWS & ARTICLES 

Etsy sellers in the EU can opt out of Offsite Ads. In fact, even shops from Switzerland can do so. The UK is not currently included, and no one knows which EU law makes this possible. If Etsy gives you trouble when you try to opt out, keep pushing.  

If you ever thought Etsy wouldn’t put your shop on payment reserve, did you know they did it to Katwise? From numerous other reports in the last month or two, Etsy is now putting more shops on reserve for very small increases in recent sales, and plenty of other bizarre reasons. One seller contacted me because the now-on-reserve shop had been empty and unused since May 2022! I’ve updated my blog post with some new details, and have a new list of potential factors. Please let me know if you have recently been put on reserve and if any of the factors - known or suspected - apply to you. 

I’ve spent the past few months researching how Etsy’s seller protection plan works in practice, and yes, there are some things you can do to reduce the chance of losing money due to Etsy’s new rules. 

ETSY NEWS 

In a disturbing development, Etsy sellers in India now must use Etsy Labels for all domestic orders. Unfortunately, I don’t expect this will be the last country Etsy does this for, as Etsy is already making it difficult for people in other countries to mark orders as shipped. Anyone experiencing this issue can avoid it by using the app, by buying labels on sites with automatic integrations with your shop (so the order is marked shipped immediately), or by trying this tedious workaround on every order. 

As I previously reported in beta, Etsy introduced a “Make an Offer” option for US vintage sellers in April. 

Etsy is pulling the usual last-minute attempt at complying with new laws by having some sellers re-verify info before the INFORM Act takes effect in the US. 

Etsy’s Annual Transparency Report shows that their technology is mostly flagging items that aren’t prohibited on Etsy, even after a few years of adopting this automated approach. I cover it in detail on Tumblr. If you are interested in how search is working these days, definitely read my post! This could explain some items suddenly getting no views. 

Speaking of which, the latest glut of bot takedowns involved several different areas:

handmade items, often best sellers from successful shops. Some have not been successful getting the listing reinstated after several days of trying

drug paraphernalia, usually for items that aren’t even remotely drug-related

listings making medical claims, which now includes mentioning the FDA. Read the updated Medical Claims policy here.

Despite this supposed increased effort of Etsy policing the site, the counterfeit accusations against the Etsy marketplace continue to percolate through the media and blogosphere, with some noting that both counterfeit and basic reselling [Glossy; soft paywall] hurt genuine handmade and vintage sellers. If you prefer video on the Citron report, here’s one from Yahoo. Then this Washington Post article [gift link; no paywall] got a lot of attention regarding dropshipping and how you can get a lot of the same things cheaper on Alibaba; there was also an investigation in the UK that came to the same conclusion. 

Etsy even addressed the negative media attention in the first quarter report, which I covered on Tumblr as usual. In case you missed it, the fourth quarter of 2022 is here. 

If you use abandoned cart coupons, note that many shoppers are now receiving them within a few hours of carting your item. 

Some sellers - mostly but not all in the UK - discovered they could no longer use the shipping carrier option “Other” on their listings around May 12. Listings already using this option cannot be edited or renewed with more than a quantity of 1. Etsy Support has told many of them that this is intentional, and that they will need to select listed carriers - but Etsy does not offer some of the common Royal Mail or other carrier options in their coding. This removal also prevents sellers from using extended delivery dates when the official ones are too optimistic, putting them at risk of forced refunds under the Purchase Protection Program. 

Canadian sellers now get reduced Tracked Packet (US) rates for Canada Post through Etsy Labels, but there are several problems with the offer. It’s only available to people with Solutions for Small Business accounts (many sellers have commercial contracts, which are not eligible for this deal), but the labels purchased no longer count towards Solutions for Small Business tiers. That means you will eventually end up paying more for your non-US labels, and for your labels for other platforms and your website. It therefore isn’t useful for bigger shops that sell to more than the US, or sell through multiple channels. Also, it appears that you can get a lower rate at Canada Post counters, as well as through eBay as of April 27th. And even if you don’t use any of those sources, tracked packet to the US has been only marginally more expensive than small packet since September, so make sure you compare prices before opting for the untracked method. 

Etsy has reintroduced its wedding registry, and included the latest wedding trends in the blog post. This should work better than the first time they did it in 2012, since Etsy now has many more items sold in multiples that can be on dozens of registries without selling out. 

The old Etsy seller app was removed from app stores by May 23, and eventually it will not work any more. 

As mentioned in a previous update, now that Etsy has brought on “tens of thousands” of new sellers in India, they are working on attracting buyers in the country. In India and interested in opening a shop? Etsy has a specific “how-to” page for you. 

A new listing page is currently being beta tested and should be available to all sellers now, but you can opt out if you have it. 

Etsy Up was held in mid-May, and all of the sessions are available online now. Most of it is rather bland advertising for Etsy, although new sellers may learn some things. 

The somewhat-depressing story of how one tech writer managed to open an Etsy shop in a week with all AI-designed artwork and print on demand services. “I created a series of four retro-futuristic puzzles. The MidJourney prompt was merely this: retro-futuristic. The results were just so good that I decided to use them as-is.” Note this still took a lot of editing and time, plus skill with the AI-art generator used. 

Reminder that Etsy knows it doesn’t have to keep every seller happy, just most of them [Fortune; paywall]. Josh Silverman said "...with 5.4 million sellers, no matter what you do, you’ll find 100,000 sellers that aren’t happy... We’re trying to create an ecosystem with the right incentives so most of our sellers can succeed." [my emphasis]

SEO: GOOGLE & OTHER SEARCH ENGINES 

Chat bot/AI search is the SEO hot topic of 2023 so far, but the commentary varies widely, and offerings are changing almost daily. Therefore, I will provide very few articles on the topics for the foreseeable future, since they are often going to be out of date by the time you read them. A few exceptions this time around:

One author suggests that AI will change SEO by making social media and question answering more important. 

Google is building a new AI search engine, while adding new AI features in the existing engine. 

“If your content isn’t better than what AI can produce, it’s not worth making.”

There are currently at least 7 types of queries that Google doesn’t use AI chat to respond to. [Twitter thread]

You can use Chat GPT to build Chrome extensions that complete SEO tasks and functions [I admit I can see this sort of thing being very useful for those of use who aren’t pro coders]

This post lists 7 good sources of AI news.

Since so much has happened since my last news summary, you may want to skim through update lists to make sure you didn't miss anything. Everything important that happened with Google in February is covered here (by Search Engine Roundtable), and here is March, then here is April, and finally, May.  

Google’s March Core Update saw big increases for some shopping sites, including Amazon and eBay, plus media and government sites.  Etsy seems to have dropped a fair amount, but this is just one study. Poshmark was also down. 

Want your images to show up in regular Google organic search (as opposed to Google Image search)? The quality of the page as well as the image itself can be important. The number of photos or images on the page may contribute. 

Ecommerce SEO is both the easiest and the hardest it has ever been right now. You need to do more than just post products. [slide deck]

Google updated its advice on linking, to now include advice on anchor text (aka link text) and internal links, among other changes.  

Title tags - the words that show up as your page title on Google and in the browser tab - can affect clicks beyond just keyword use.

Want to show up for Google’s featured snippets? (They’ve changed recently) You may need to edit the page in a few different ways. 

Just 16 companies (and all of their subsidiaries) control most of the top-ranking pages in Google searches. This is an old study with newly-updated information. 

A lot of small business owners ask me what “keyword difficulty” really means. Part of the problem is that different tools calculate it differently. [article has tips on how to approach the issue] On the same topic, don’t forget Bing’s keyword research tool when you are trying to find new keywords. There are 15 other free keyword tools in this article. [I always recommend Keywords Everywhere and TagCrowd] And here is a searchable site for all sorts of SEO tools (some are paid tools). 

Google’s Search Off the Record podcast took a look at moving websites, and the possible SEO issues, with solutions. [podcast and pdf transcript] Here’s a different post with a checklist for site migrations, in case you have one coming up.