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#i really want to scream sometimes
lynn-or-something · 2 months
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I will scream into the void until the void screams back
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apollosgiftofprophecy · 9 months
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Why Jason Grace is The Most Tragic Character in the Riordanverse
*in no way is this trying to dial down Nico's own suffering, I'm just stating my case for Jason because godsdamn SOMEBODY needs to say it!*
@most-tragic-character-tournament here's propoganda i came out guns ablazing
List of why fans are saying Nico:
Lost his mother
lost years of his life
found out he was a demigod at age 10
lost sister at 10
rough relationship with his dad
closeted gay
crush is madly in love with somebody else
forced to come out
List of why Jason is more tragic:
Lost his mom to alcoholism/mental decline
Lost his ENTIRE FUCKING CHILDHOOD because Said Mom gave him up to Juno to be raised by a PACK OF WOLVES who would've EATEN HIM if he was WEAK FOR EVEN A SECOND - AS A FUCKING TWO YEAR OLD
Was a trained demigod FROM THE GET-GO (again, TWO YEARS OLD)
Because of previously stated separation, was TAKEN FROM HIS SISTER WHO LOVED HIM SO MUCH SHE RAN AWAY BECAUSE SHE COULDN'T TAKE THE GUILT AND FEAR AND RAGE THAT FILLED HER AT HIS ABSENCE
Was set up into a "perfect" relationship by Juno/Hera WHILE HAVING HIS MEMORIES TAKEN
Jason may not have had the awful forced outting Nico had to go through, but...that's not really his fault? Nobody has any control over their sexual identity, and Jason? Well. He never really got to explore it. Because that was taken from him too.
Thinks he LOST LEO VALDEZ, ONE OF HIS ACTUAL FIRST FRIENDS, WHO LIKED HIM FOR HIM AND NOT BECAUSE OF HIS STATUS
FORCED TO COMPLY TO A DEMANDING SOCIETY THAT EXALTED HIM FROM DAY 1 BECAUSE HIS DAD IS THE OH-SO-IMPORTANT JUPITER (*cough victim of nepotism cough*)
AND WHEN HE TRIES TO COMBAT THAT NEPOTISM HE KEEPS GETTING PUSHBACK UNTIL HE FALTERS
then. then his girlfriend breaks up with him - not because of any drama, or even a disagreement, but over a very valid point
their relationship didn't exactly start out very...honestly. Jason had been mind-wiped of all memories and Piper had fake ones implanted into her to make her think she liked Jason as more than a friend. sure. they had a pretty nice relationship, but when everything slowed down and they took a look at their lives?
Piper's the one who sees it first, and makes the decision. Jason is heartbroken, but understands - he even, dare I say, agrees that they should end the relationship. it was built on fake memories - you could say it was built on lies.
and now Jason has this opportunity to step back and analyze who he is and what he wants.
what he finds is depressing. everything he's had, everything's he's been up till now...
it's not him.
he never wanted to be raised by Lupa and her wolves.
he never wanted to be Jupiter's son
he never wanted to be the exalted leader Camp Jupiter praised him for
From day 1 his life was somebody else's. his first steps were under the tutelage of a wolf, not of the loving eyes of his sister
Camp Jupiter only ever saw him as the demigod to be praised and turn to above all others, even before he became praetor.
Jason's life...was never his own.
and now that he's away from all that pressure and expectation...he doesn't know who he is.
Son of Jupiter?
Champion of Juno?
Praetor of the Twelfth Legion?
Member of the Prophesized Seven?
Hero of Olympus?
no. he was never himself under these names.
he was never...Jason.
but maybe now he could start navigating his own life. without some god intervening for once. this would be good for him, and for Piper, to find their own way.
but then. then they talk to Herophile...and find out one of them will die. And Jason? Well, he's not going to let Piper be taken from the life she deserves. he may not be her boyfriend, her knight in shining armor, but he sure as HELL loves her - especially as a friend. And if there's one thing you should know about Jason? It's that he loves his friends.
so what does he do? He sacrifices himself. He duels Caligula himself, and urges Piper, Meg, and Apollo to Go, save yourselves! and -
he's stabbed. through the chest. the only thing he can do? Look to Apollo, to the blue gaze so much like his own drenched in horror, and ask; Remember. because he didn't get to live the life he wished, but maybe Apollo could - no, Apollo can, he can make the difference Jason wanted. Because he trusts Apollo.
Jason doesn't regret his sacrifice. he saved Piper from the prophecy, after all. He saved Apollo & Meg's lives too.
in fact, Jason didn't really mind dying. Because he didn't have much of a life either. And a life like that? shrug It's worth sacrificing for those who deserve theirs.
and as icing on the cake, remember who Jason's father is? The almighty, all-powerful Jupiter himself, King of the Gods?
he doesn't do a damn thing to help Jason. Not a single. Thing.
because Jupiter/Zeus doesn't care about his children. Especially his sons.
Zeus saved Thalia. But he didn't even try to save Jason.
Trying would have at least lessened the pain...
People like to claim Jason is a bland, boring character who's never suffered a minute in his life. That he's a golden retriever with no flaws.
Well.
Take a look up there and ask yourself - it that the life of a boy who knows no suffering?
Because it sure as hell don't look that way to me.
To me, it looks like Jason was a used, depressed young man who never got to choose his own path. Who's father abandoned him first to his wife's mercy, then to a cruel emperor's.
Jason Grace suffered.
and he never got to live that happy life he saw within the Fates.
Never got to get that family, those grandchildren he saw himself telling the story of the Argo II to.
Because The Fall of Jason Grace is a true, utter tragedy.
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isogenderskitty · 3 months
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it has to be said, it’s very funny that despite the title of “nerdy prude” ruth is in fact the least prudish person on the entire planet. if she was any hornier i think she would just explode on the spot
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insertsomthinawesome · 5 months
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I'M BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!! Okay so honestly I have been very very inconsistent over the years with just disappearing for periods of time due to various things 😂 So it probably seemed pretty normal to most people.
But it felt different on my side, so I'm excited to be back in business. I took a month long hiatus! 31 days of not drawing digital art. Its not something I talk about on here? But I've been suffering from some serious long term Art Burnout for.... a really really long time. Long enough that I should've taken a break probably years ago. It finally got so bad that I could barely draw. I was scared to do it (cause it always looked "bad" in my eyes [i'll come back to that]) and doing it was exhausting and disheartening.
I talked it over with somebody and realized that the fear and anger and frustration I felt towards my own artwork was uh. Not Normal or Healthy. And I finally committed to taking a real break for once.
I still drew a little bit by hand? Traditional art has always felt like it has lower stakes for me (i don't often share it online, and sometimes I don't even share it with friends) so I did some of that when I felt like it. But Digital art was completely off the table.
I had put such an immense pressure on myself to make my digital art perfect, to make as much of it as quickly as possible to satisfy something. It wasn't fun anymore. I'm proud of what i've made over the years! But for a long time now the stuff I've been making was made while hating every second of making it. With some rare exceptions.
I hated my art! It was a combination of Perfectionism, taking in too many external expectations, and the burnout. If you hate doing something its kinda hard to love it even when you want too lol. It wasn't "Bad" in the sense that the quality was low and it was ugly! It was "Bad" in the sense that it was unhealthy for me to keep doing it at that point in time.
I'm glad to report though, that with my hiatus officially over as of Wednesday last week: I am once again. In Love. With doing art, and being an artist :)
I put off taking a break for years cause I was scared that taking a break would mean that I would never achieve all the things I wanted to do with art. I was scared it was a stupid and lazy thing to do that would mean I'd never achieve my dreams. And Also even though I kinda hated drawing, I also loved making art. Its a weird duality that I can't even really explain??? I hated it but I also loved it. I wanted it but I also wanted to run from it. It wasn't until I was more mature and had more clarity and insight (and unfortunately also until the problems got worse) that I was finally able to let go of those fears and just do it.
And I'm really really glad I did. It was everything I needed. And I hope to strike a better balance in the future with art. Taking more breaks when I need them, or just when other things have my attention like reading or Video games (Some star rail got played during this time xD)
From the outside things probably aren't going to be that different?? At this point I don't really have any sure plans to post anything I've been drawing since my Hiatus ended. I might or I might not xD I'm still a hobbyist artist taking things at her own pace, but I hope that it shows how much happier I am :)
Whumptober 2023 is being officially put to rest by this post btw! I was in major burnout when that event started, and I'm ready to just, move on from all the past expectations I'd shoved on my shoulders. If I feel like filling any of the prompts or going back to any of the ideas I'd come up for it I will! But I'm not going to worry about doing it unless the desire sets in. Thanks to everybody who's been so kind to me throughout my time on here as an artist! Ya'lls tags and screaming and kind words, the fanfic, the asks and the responses? Its been fantastic :) You guys have made me laugh, smile, and cry tears of joy. I hope from here that things only get better and sweeter! And if I have bad days again, that's okay too.
Here's to 2024 and whatever it may bring ya'll :D 🎉🎉✨✨🧡💜
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skitskatdacat63 · 7 months
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2023 Las Vegas Grand Prix - Fernando Alonso
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violeteyedkiller · 2 months
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honestly thinking of changing my approach to RP. I mostly find I have attention span for quick one-offs with asks or quick threads related to dash events/commentary or what not. I'm still holding onto my drafts for if I get muse to really crack into them again but
Yeah idk just felt like rambling on my lunch break
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kingdomvel · 2 months
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Every time I see something stardew valley I think about (and I'm putting it here because i lost the post) streamer au obikin and Anakin convincing Obi-Wan to play stardew with him.
Anakin starts romancing Harvey immediately, is very very insistent on it.
Obi-Wan is like: but why do you want him? why not one of the young bachelors, maybe the emo with a motorbike? or the blonde one that is in a band? they seem like much better options than the middle aged doctor
And Anakin can only stare at the camera, hoping that his viewers understand how ridiculous his husband is being. Knowing that all of them know that he is a middle aged man in the medical field fucker
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lgbtiwtv · 2 years
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one of my favorite hobbies is in fact making fun of lestat because let’s be honest he does deserve it 99% of the time but then i start rereading tvl and suddenly I’m like….man he really went through so much, huh? he was really traumatized and taken advantage of over and over by both strangers and people he loved….like man he really was stalked, kidnapped, and forcefully made into a vampire against his will….he faced years of abuse from his father and brothers…..he witnessed the death of his only lover and before that his resentment and eventual madness….he really cries every other page and has 10 existential crises before he even becomes a vampire but he wants to be good he wants to be happy he tried to run away to the church he tried to run away with the theatre troupe he just wanted to act and love and be loved and at every turn he was done wrong and hurt and abandoned and nobody ever really helped him and I—
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bumblingbabooshka · 3 months
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One of the best Voyager scenes to indicate Tuvok & Neelix's dynamic and how I think Tuvok is just as if not more 'annoying'(positive) than Neelix is when Neelix pours Tuvok a fresh squeezed glass of a fruit juice blend and Tuvok's like (paraphrased) "I don't want to drink this." and Neelix is like "Can you please try it?" and Tuvok's like "I don't want to, you're really bad at this sort of thing. It's going to taste bad." and Neelix says that Ensign XYZ said she LOVED it, she even had a second glass! And Tuvok says Ensign XYZ could drink poison without a second thought and Neelix is like "Tuvok could you please just TRY it? Just try a little SIP of it PLEASE??" and Tuvok sighs and rolls his eyes and sniffs it before taking a sip and it turns out he loves it. Turns out it tasted good actually. And then after all that Neelix tries to talk to him over eggs (which he's again cooking fresh for him) and Tuvok tells him he doesn't wanna hear "the life history of his breakfast." Absolutely insufferable this man I would have burned his eggs on PURPOSE!!!!
#I love Neelix so much and I think he and Tuvok are very funny together - irritating4irritating#People say 'Neelix is so pushy with Tuvok!' and you know what? I think Tuvok can handle it. I think maybe he does need to be pushed -#down a flight of stairs. (he's my favorite character and he's so annoying...TUVOK!!!!!)#Tuvok: -kicking and screaming- I don't want to drink the juice!!! It's poison!!! You're trying to poison me!!!!!!!!!#Neelix: Can you please drink the juice. The fresh squeezed juice I made for you Mr. Vulcan??? Can you please???#Tuvok: Fine but if I die it's your fault. If I die from the poison you're FORCING me to drink it's on y- Oh this is delicious actually.#and don't tell me 'Neelix didn't make it SPECIFICALLY for Tuvok' bc I know he didn't but he says#'I'll start squeezing that second glass!' after Tuvok finishes his sip so he IS freshly squeezing it#Neelix: -makes Tuvok fresh squeezed juice-#Tuvok: Are you trying to poison me???#Neelix: -talks to Tuvok while making his eggs-#Tuvok: Can you be quiet???#<- TUVOK!!!!!!!! I'M GONNA KILL YOU EHHEHEHEH <3#Tuvok is the most annoying guy ever bc he doesn't care about what people think and is a snob with a lowkey superiority complex#vs Neelix is perceived as annoying (post his relationship with Kes) bc he cares a lot about being useful and helping the crew and sometimes#is too pushy because of that but listen...I think Neelix is sweet and genuinely trying his best - after the Kes plotline with him ends I#really don't find him objectionable. Just chatty & a bit overbearing maybe Meanwhile Tuvok !!!#Meanwhile Tuvok!!!!!!!!! HHEHEHHE#st voyager#star trek voyager#I think they should have done more with Neelix thinking the crew of Voyager were spoiled - specifically how Tuvok acts Like That sometimes#little lord Tuvok. oH SORRY...for DEIGNING to speak while preparing your eggs your HIGHNESS!!#I think people do a disservice to Tuvok by not talking more about how he's kind of a hardass and a snob v_v also a disservice to Janeway#indirectly bc her bestie is kind of a hardass and a snob and what does that say about her??#I also wish Neelix kept up a bit of that 'these people are crazy and also so soft oh my god shut up about the food being bad - we're trying#to SURVIVE!!! Eat the Leola Root!!' from the earlier seasons...I like when he shows he has a bit of bite#It's just funny and interesting that Janeway isn't friends with Tuvok bc he's 'not like other Vulcans' - she's friends with the most#Vulcany Vulcan ever and I love that for them.#CRIMINAL that we don't ever get any in-depth insight into their friendship#Tuvok
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a-wondering-thought · 5 months
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are you the night sky? cause i see stars whenever i stand up
-a very bad pick up line that would not work nor makes any sense but does describe the relationship between me and my brain
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yoroshiu · 6 months
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There's something so cruel about how Sora had to carry the weight of multiple people's feelings alongside his own.
We, as people, already struggle to handle our emotions but imagine feeling two, or three, or four or more people's emotions as well. Like in Dream Drop, imagine taking in Roxas's grief and trauma within a single moment. Or feeling Ventus's own urges to save his friends throughout KH3. It's not shown as much with Xion or Vanitas, but I'd like to imagine that he felt echoes of what they felt in waves. And heck, while we're at it, how about anyone who was in his heart for some time, like Kairi.
Even if Sora wasn't feeling all of those feelings constantly, could you imagine being just overfilled with others' memories and the emotions they felt directly as if it was you experiencing it?
I think about that moment with Roxas a lot and remain in awe that Sora could keep moving forward after that. That game had him getting hit with a barrage of people and emotions, and he still kept fighting until it literally broke his heart enough to make him susceptible to being possessed by darkness.
That one quote from Xigbar about putting too much power (or in this case, feelings) in one place might break it haunts me in my dreams.
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maxsix · 1 year
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strangersails · 6 months
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honestly MHA (and mostly bkdk)’s got some of the best fanfics i've ever read
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segasys · 7 months
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playing around with some nightcat/inv designs, partially inspired by @faelingdraws and @dieselpvnk's designs
also i really like plural nightcat/inv by faeling, so im adopting that for them if you dont mind, but if thats not ok please tell me!!
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im-smart-i-swear · 9 months
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i always assumed he cut his hair with a pair of shitty scissors in front of his bathroom mirror at like 2am
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oldmisfortune · 1 year
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Finally got to finishing the comic idea that's been haunting me lately ;; i got super lazy with some of the poses and just copy-pasted them xD i hope this amuses people as much as it amused me :)
This is happening in my personal alternative ANE where Ez got dragged back to the guard and Nevra isn't a stuck up at first anymore and oh look! My oc is also there!! (I haven't decided on a name yet ;;;;;;)
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