#i think i did like. even more of that than my extremely socialist (as in member of the SWP) friend

[lilydvoratrelundar]

fuck bibliographies. i didnt make it all up just trust me.

[radgirl-spray]

Rant.

it always gives me whiplash when gringos call me or other latinas on radblog "Republican" and "nazis".

Because they are so sure they are making such the point about us being nazis and bringing conservative and apocalyptic takes on them because we don't want men in females spaces, and yet from our perspective, they are still thousands of people all across latam who simply dissapeared when the north american goverment decided to interfiere in latam's politics which lead to real, actual genocides based on politic stance. Specifically being leftist.

My country in particular had one of the most brutal dictatorships in latam. Over 40.000 people were killed, tortured or simply dissapeared just to prevent socialism, despite the socialist president at the time being chosen democatrically.

Now, women, mostly college students feminists at the time were systematically tortured. I'm not talking about internet persecution or some horrible missgender crime. I'm talking of whole brigades raping 14 to 21 year old girls. I'm talking of soldiers setting girls on fire. I'm talking about men open pregnant women to dispatch the baby. I'm talking about torture and murder.

Why? because they dared to talk about politics, because they dared to talk about contraceptives. About feminine issues. For being Left.

It was also a time where the wrong opinion could get you killed, could mean your children being killed. For being brown, for being indio, for being poor. Think of you neighbour accusing you of hearing certain music and your house being raded and your teenage children being taken to a camp to never be seen again. I'm not talking 100 years ago. I'm talking my parents and anyone who is 5 years older than me.

To this day we are extremely affraid of police and the military. The levels of poverty Latam has are hardly something people in first world countries have seen in a years, because the poverty itself has been caused for said countries and their progress. I'm talking whole neighbourhoods of houses made of cardboard while some first world country leaves a bunch of chemical wasteland just right up the corner where we live so they live better.

Two years ago there was a breakout in my country, it was quite famous. You know the first thing the police did?

They raped and hanged a girl on the street. In 2021.

And then comes some random USA/Canadian citizen and calls you "a republican" and "a nazi".

Did I mention after II world war many nazis escaped to latam and formed whole german colonies for either experimenting on humans or create pedophile nets and raping centers? the more you know.

But we are nazis, we are republicans. Despite the fact that that our indigenous people recognize women as adult human females, that indigenous women were hunted down and used historically to be bred by whites colonizers just like them. Despite the fact that most of us are mestizos, that color and class go hand in hand in latam, that we have a culture heavily based on religious intakes of what's women's place and that we shut up when the men talk, because that's macho culture. We are nazis and we are republicans, despite the fact that their fucking country killed thousands of us because we wanted to try left and to hope for something more than extreme poverty. Shit, we've even been called colonizer by some chicano who doesn't even speak spanish. I mean, what are the odds.

But the white men need to speak, the gringo has something to say, they need us to respect their pronouns and go along with their progress. So they packed their bullshit religion and ship it right down the frontera, and now we have to swallow too. Because we are latinas, we live in the backyard, right? what do we know about the experiences of american dudes in skirts.

[blueshistorysims]

October 31st, 1923, London, England

Out of the parties the Porters were known for, it was their Halloween party they were infamous for, and anyone who was anybody was invited, not just friends and acquaintances. Byron thought it amusing, seeing everyone dressed up in elegant costumes that likely cost a pretty penny. They ranged from cute, like Wilhelmina’s ladybug ensemble, to well, his sister’s extremely accurate gown of Empress Elisabeth of Austria she’d made herself. He had not a clue where she’d gotten such a fine wig, nor did he want to know. 

Of course, Byron was less focused on the party, but rather the two women who were talking near his sister and her paramour. He’d never seen them before, but the woman dressed as a Greek god looked rather familiar, though he couldn’t place why.

“I wonder who those lovely ladies are.”

Montgomery, who’d been in a sour mood for most of the night, turned his head and looked generally surprised. “Oh, don’t ya even think ‘bout it.”

“What? You know Miss Dionysus?”

“That’s Miss Eleora Balass.”

“...Like the Richer-Than-God Baghdadi Jew Balasses?”

“Aye. I’m her father’s personal physician.”

“You? Salim Balass’ personal doctor? He’s everything you are politically against.”

“I think he likes havin’ someone who isn’t afraid to speak their mind. We get into such arguments, and I’m afraid I’ve pushed too far, and he’ll fire me, but then the next day he’ll invite me to lunch and we’ll laugh over it.”

The Balass family were one of the wealthiest families in the world—Salim Balass being the fourth richest man in Europe, and listed as one of the top twenty wealthiest men in the world. They had made their fortune as merchant and traders, rising to power in the Mughal Empire before moving their base of operations to India after being forced to flee Baghdad in the early 19th century, where they established control over the Indian cotton industry, moving to Great Britain as their home in the late 1880s. 

“Well, what’s Miss Balass like?”

Montgomery sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “No.”

Byron couldn’t help but smirk. “Introduce me. I’ll force you if I must.”

Almost on cue, Miss Balass and her friend turned around, her face lighting up upon recognizing the Scotman’s face, and she waved. “Oh, Dr. MacGregor!”

“Well, I suppose you’ll have to introduce us now, Montgomery.”

“Fuck off.”

“You know the Porters, Dr. MacGregor?” Miss Balass asked.

“Aye, Mr. Porter and I were flatmates many years ago.” He sighed, turning to Byron reluctantly. “May I introduce his grace the Duke of Feldsbury?”

Byron smiled and nodded his head. “A pleasure.”

“A duke? My, my, I wasn’t aware you knew such people.”

The other woman turned to her friend. “I thought you said he was socialist.”

“Oh, he is, don’t worry. Dr. MacGregor is my late sister’s widower. We knew each other far before I was even aware of the Feldsbury title.”

“Oh, Feldsbury! You’re the former army captain one who married the Gardenhouse girl… and well, divorced her too.”

The way she said it was so amusing that Byron couldn’t help but laugh. “Yes, I am unwed now.” He turned to Miss Balass’ friend, dressed as Anne Boleyn. “I’m sorry, we haven’t been properly introduced, Miss Boleyn.”

She laughed as Miss Balass blushed. 

“This is Miss Samira Patel. Our fathers were business partners when we were in India, and they still are today. Miss Patel is one of my closest friends. Dr. MacGregor you know is my father’s physician.”

Montgomery smiled at Miss Patel. “Lovely to meet ya.”

Once they moved past pleasantries, the conversation grew much more lively, and as Byron grew enamored with Miss Balass, he could tell Montgomery was quickly warming up to Miss Patel.

In fact, when the quartet took their leave, Byron looked over to Montgomery, Miss Patel holding his arm, and said he planned to spend the night with Miss Balass—in Gaelic of course so the women wouldn’t understand.

The doctor smirked and replied in English, “I think so too.”

“You speak Gaelic, duke?”

He smiled at her. “Would you like to find out what else I speak, Miss Balass?”

She rolled her eyes as she waved for a taxi.   

[mariacallous]

In 2007 I published what was probably my most-read book What’s Left. It asked novel questions.

"Why is it that apologies for a militant Islam which stands for everything the liberal-left is against come from the liberal-left? Why will students hear a leftish postmodern theorist defend the exploitation of women in traditional cultures but not a crusty conservative don…Why, even in the case of Palestine, can’t those who say they support the Palestinian cause tell you what type of Palestine they would like to see?

“After the 9/11 attacks on New York and Washington, why were you as likely to read that a sinister conspiracy of Jews controlled American or British foreign policy in a superior literary journal as in a neo-Nazi hate sheet? And why after the 7/7 attacks on London did leftish rather than right-wing newspapers run pieces excusing suicide bombers who were inspired by a psychopathic theology from the ultra-right?”

In short, I asked why was the world upside down? In the past conservatives made excuses for fascism because they mistakenly saw it as a continuation of their democratic right-wing ideas. In the early 2000s, overwhelmingly and everywhere, liberals and leftists were more likely than conservatives to excuse fascistic governments and movements, with the exception of their native far-right parties. As long as local racists were white, they had no difficulty in opposing them in a manner that would have been recognizable to the traditional left. But give them a foreign far-right movement that was anti-Western and they treated it as at best a distraction and at worst an ally.

I say my questions were novel because, although socialism was one of the great political movements of the 20th century, few discussed the consequences of its collapse in the 1980s. The decline of the socialist religion had as profound and as perverse consequences as the collapse of Christianity in the late 19th century. But no one, or next to no one, wanted to think about them.

As a good atheist I hated to paraphrase GK Chesterton, but there’s no escaping the old Catholic apologist.  My argument boiled down to saying that what Chesterton said about God applies just as well to socialism.  When men stop believing in it, “they don't believe in nothing; they believe in anything.”

After dreams of socialism and communism vanished in the 1980s, large sections of the radical left preferred any enemy of the West to the West having no enemies at all: radical Islam, insane Sunni and Shia dictators, Putin’s Russia, violent misogynists and homophobes. As long as they were anti-western, and in particular the enemies of the US and Israel, the radical left was happy to form alliances.

Or as Judith Butler explained the new orthodoxy in 2006, “Understanding Hamas, Hezbollah as social movements that are progressive, that are on the Left, that are part of a global Left, is extremely important.”That by any normal standard Hamas and Hezbollah were tyrannical, inquisitorial, and misogynist was irrelevant. They were anti-western and that alone made them “progressive”.

Not everything I wrote in 2007 stands up well today. In the 2010s we began to see Conservatives fawning over trash like Viktor Orban, and from 2016 on we have seen the wholesale abasement of the US right before Donald Trump. The lure of authoritarianism was by no means confined to the left

But overall, what I said remains true. And just to be clear, I did not then and do not now believe in the horseshoe theory. The far left is not the same as the far right. There is a huge difference between living in a country ruled by Donald Trump and a country ruled by Nicolas Maduro or between Iran and North Korea. The far left and far right target different people, and serve different interests.

It is better to think of radical Islam seducing elements of an exhausted radical left. The white western working class would no longer die for the revolution (truth be told, it was never that keen on dying for the revolution even at the best of times for the left). But young Muslim men would fight and kill Americans and Israelis. And if you could forget about the obscurantist religious tyranny, the hatred of every human right, the persecution and murder of Arab and Iranian leftists, they might in a certain light appear to be a replacement for the western working class that had let the far left down so badly.

When What’s Left came out respectable critics said words to the effect of “come on, Nick, you are just talking about tiny groups of post-Stalinists and post-Trotskyists. The real left was in the then Labour government, trade unions and charities and campaign groups.”

I replied with words to the effect of politics is downstream of culture. Look at academia, the comment pages of the Guardian, the organisers of demonstrations, the left trade unions and many of those supposedly respectable campaign groups and charities. They are getting drunk on a weird mixture of far-leftism, far-rightism and postmodernism. They will embrace medieval levels of superstition and regimes they would have no hesitation in describing as fascist if they were white.

I asked where this was leading. The far left provided an answer when, to the astonishment of my respectable critics, it took over the Labour party under Jeremy Corbyn.

Now the Gaza war has led to another pact being formed between the western far left and radical Islam. Over at Quillette,  an American academic, Susie Linfield, has gone through the whole hideous detail of how leftist thought leaders and academics celebrated the murderers. Some of those she indicted are so predictable you would miss them if they were not there.

Linfield notes that in the New Left Review, Britain’s leading Marxist journal, Tariq Ali praised the terrorists for “rising up against the colonizers” and implied, bizarrely, that the murders resulted from Palestinian frustration with Israel’s recent enormous pro-democracy demonstrations against the Netanyahu government.

Elsewhere depression replaces tedium. Anyone who remembers the scrupulous work of Michael Waltzer on what constituted just war will be appalled about what has happened to Dissent, the journal he edited.  Dissent used to believe that the deliberate targeting of civilians was a war crime. Not so now when the civilians are Jews. In its pages, one writer  described Israel as a ‘genocide machine’ and argued that Israeli victims should not be grieved.

“It is not possible to publicly grieve an Israeli Jewish life lost to violence without tithing ideologically to the IDF—whether you like it or not.” So grief is impermissible. Indeed, it’s worse than that: grief is colonialist.

 Elsewhere tenured academics were unable to contain their enthusiasm: the attacks were “innovative,” “astonishing,” a “major achievement,”  “awesome,” “incredible,” and “a stunning victory,’’ one wrote.

Ah professors. They write in ink and dream of blood.

The essential point to bear in mind is that these expressions of joy at the death of Jews on 7 October was almost instantaneous. It came before a single Israeli bomb fell on Gaza. It was not a condemnation of Israel’s disproportionately violent response. That was still to come. Instead of rational protest there was a celebration of the mass murder of Jews by Hamas, a terrorist group inspired not only by Islamism but by European fascism.  As if to confirm my argument in What’s Left the far left was cheering the far right because it has no one else to cheer.

The same question I asked in the early 2000s can be asked now: where is this heading?

I do not go along with the view among conservatives that all who march with Islamists and their leftist allies are antisemites by definition. From the start of this war, I have said that Israel’s aim of destroying Hamas is impossible. I was going to say that it is impossible without unacceptable civilian casualties. But in truth it is impossible in all circumstances. The Israeli forces simply cannot find Hamas fighters as they melt into a population of two million disorientated people. This is not simply my view. Military specialists are noting the low level of Israeli casualties and the small number of Hamas kills the Israeli Defence Forces are claiming to have made.  The odds are that Hamas is refusing to opt for a direct confrontation, and allowing civilians to pay the price. It is always reasonable to protest against futile wars and needless suffering, and this war is no exception to the rule.

And yet before I turn too accommodating, let me say there is no other area of progressive life where liberals and leftists ally with racists and don’t show even the smallest embarrassment about their behaviour.

Here’s a thought experiment. There is a growing concern on the western far right about low birth rates. Rather than allow immigration, Viktor Orban in Hungary is offering tax exemptions to women who have four or more children. The left naturally wants higher welfare payments for mothers, too, and in the case of the UK wants to end a nasty Conservative policy which penalises families on benefits if they have more than two children.

For all that, no progressive would join a demonstration of neo-Nazis or alt-right supporters in favour of encouraging British mothers to have more children. They would think that there was a serious flaw in a campaign that attracted ultra-right white support. They would worry about inciting prejudice against ethnic minorities in the UK.  And yet they see nothing wrong in going along with campaigns that attract ultra-right Islamist support or in worrying too much about the UK's Jewish minority.

If the grim absurdities of the left of the early 2000s presaged Corbynism and the collapse of the Labour party, what do the 2020s have in store? I am trying to be objective and so won’t go off into long laments about the moral health of the sacred “Left”. I long-ago gave up worrying about that in any case.

First and most obviously the failure of the white left for more than a generation to oppose Israel while also opposing antisemitism has mainstreamed racial prejudices. The explosion in anti-Jewish attacks since 7 October is an inevitable consequence. I have never seen Jewish people feel so isolated. It’s not simply the far left and Muslim agitators who scare them. BBC presenters and others in the mainstream, who make their indifference to the massacre of Jews plain, foretell a future where Israel is a pariah state and Jews are damned by association and must pay the price. Perhaps that future is already here, and we will be permanently in a Corbynista world where Jews are seen as sinister agents in a Zionist conspiracy manipulating western policy.

Second, the uncritical treatment of Hamas naturally reinforces the most bigoted and reactionary elements in British Muslim communities. The consequences we can only guess at, but I think we can say by looking back at the last time the British left ran off with radical Islamists, they will lead us down new spirals of extremism.

[qqueenofhades]

UBI would just be giving people handouts, though. Like, "congrats your alive you get money" doesn't provide the best incentive to work? We're going to have a lot of freeloaders if we do that.

Uhhhh.

First of all, I think it's pretty obvious from my other posts that you and I are not going to agree about this, so I'm not sure what you're trying to accomplish here. Second of all, I... don't.... see.... what's....wrong with a government fundamentally providing basic financial support to its citizens??? There are plenty of people who CAN'T work for one reason or another and who struggle all their lives on extremely meager levels of support that the ableist state has decided they can (very grudgingly) be allowed to have, despite their terrible sin of not being able to join the workforce. Besides, the "UBI will make those lazy freeloaders not work!!!" is a) capitalist propaganda and b) not even true. Finland is one of the countries to have completed a UBI trial and guess what! People who received it were actually more likely to be in work after the trial ended!

Interestingly, the final results of Finland’s program, released this spring, found that a basic income actually had a positive impact on employment. People on the basic income were more likely to be employed than those in the control group, and the differences were statistically significant, albeit small.

This coincided with a strong uptick in mental health, positive social support, and other quality-of-life indicators. The people in the Finnish trial received €560 a month, which is obviously not enough to replace work-related income, but which DID provide enough extra funding to help fill critical gaps and provide more peace of mind. Besides, humans are naturally industrious and like doing things?? And are usually happy to work and find ways to occupy themselves, and the idea that they only "deserve" to survive or have their basic needs met if they're working long hours at a job that they probably hate is, again, capitalistic propaganda nonsense (not to mention, has strong undercurrents of social Darwinism, eugenics, and other questionable social philosophies).

In a world that is so wildly economically unjust, where a tiny handful of people control an incredibly disproportionate amount of wealth and so many people suffer with so little, you're simply never going to convince me, ever, that making more effort to financially meet their basic needs is a bad thing. For God's sake, giving them five hundred extra bucks a month, if we're replicating the Finland conditions, is hardly going to create a culture of "freeloaders." Why is that worse than forcing them to work multiple jobs for shit wages and still struggling? Why is their "production" the only important thing about them? Why is this the metric you've chosen to complain about in what is, as noted, an entirely theoretical program that is decades away from being politically feasible in America, if ever, and yet has been experimented and implemented in successful democratic-socialist societies that are, gasp, NOT AMERICA?

In short, as it has been put before and is still the best way to say it: I don't know how to explain to you that you should care about other people. Because, as noted, of all the outrageous economic injustices that currently exist in this world, it's extremely confusing to me that this is the one you would choose to complain about. And in closing: any UBI program in America would be funded, a la Social Security and Medicare, with taxpayer money. So that is YOUR MONEY to start with (and that of everyone who has ever paid a single penny in federal or state tax for any reason, which is almost every single American citizen over the age of 18). It's not "giving handouts" to distribute it back to poor people, rather than continuing to jigger the system so rich people pay nothing into it at all and are allowed to reap insane profits. And the idea that all other working people are your enemy and if they get anything, there will be less for you, is a deliberate technique used to keep you blaming each other, and not seriously questioning the grotesque accumulation of those at the very top. Because yeah. Uh. I think they can absolutely afford to fucking share.

[what-shitfuckery-is-this-ew]

the way my opinion of poor things did a 180 after starting the book

tldr: Poor Things is a good film, but when you look at the book and you see what has been taken away from it, you kind of want to cry. It's the same feeling i got when watching Dune.

Like originally. i did think the sex was excessive but i also thought it was necessary ( it was important but not the way they showed it)

I thought the sex work scene was important because we all knew the owner of the brothel was horrible so we knew what she said was wrong but reading the book, the argument Bella makes about wanting to not be exploited by the brothel owner (who was taking a big proportion of her money) was much more important to have.

I didn't think a lot about the Alexandria sequence, but after reading the books i actually found others who talked about it and how weirdly racist it was (and like i didn't even clock why the yellow made me uncomfortable). Also just making her get scammed sending the ultimate message of 'there's nothing we can do about poverty and being kind will get you hurt' was something, especially when the original was that she didn't just get scammed out of her money (Duncan gambled it away) and she gave all she could to an actual person, it being stolen did not give the same message.

The ending being her ultimately upholding the status quo by going into a position of power where she too can commit scientific atrocities, rather than have her challenge the status quo by becoming a doctor who helps poor women get the care they need? disgusting

Then there's the misreading of the entire book by ignoring how BELLA IS SCOTLAND. She's a metaphor for Scotland, the baby head was to represent how her body and her mind (Scottish people and the UK parliament) were not connected and in sync + the infanitlisation of Scots by the English. Even removing her father who only complains that he didn't get a better deal out of marrying her off to an ENGLISH man (referencing the politicians crying about not getting a better deal in the Union)

Removing the socialist story, removing the fact the story had unreliable narrators (Mccandles telling the story in the book was not bad no matter what you say Screenrant because it was a message surrounding, guess what, the debate in SCOTLAND about whether the depiction of Scotland should stay true to it's beauty or change to satisfy the international community, because guess what Bella writes her own story literally after that)

Like i could go on and on and on about how the changes were ultimately girlbossifying the story. It was white feminism + girlboss feminism to the extreme.

Bella Baxter more like Taylor Swift

[pebblysand]

on violent threats

context: see @photomatt 's page

i have said this before but i will say it again: there is a small but very vocal crowd of people on the left who are currently choosing violent methods of protest, including sending online death threats to people they believe to be harmful to an identity/fight they themselves support. this is particularly the case (because i think it's important to state it clearly) with trans rights activism. and, i think it's important to talk about it.

now, as a disclaimer, i support trans rights. because i have more than two brain cells. trans women are women and trans men are men. this isn't the issue. as another disclaimer, it is evident that violent threats are illegal in many jurisdictions, and that many online platforms choose to moderate hate speech to the best of their ability. this is also not the issue. what i'm writing about below is what is morally and ethically justified, rather than legal or illegal. i'm also not writing about online content moderation because while i'd have loads to say about this, it is beyond the scope of this post.

now, as you can probably see from his page, the CEO of tumblr is in the middle of a shit storm for suspending the account of a trans woman who, amongst other things, made public statements falling under tumblr's content moderation policies, namely saying she hoped he'd die in a car crash. i think we can all agree that this isn't nice. on a personal level, having been on the receiving end of similar death threats/posts last may (not that tumblr did anything about it), i know first-hand how damaging those can be for the person on the receiving end. it makes you paranoid. it is scary and hurtful. i also know that simply by posting this post, i am further potentially exposing myself to a resurgence of these. but i also think the below needs to be said and the following question deserves to be answered:

is it right for trans activists to be sending online death threats to people they perceive as being transphobes right now?

i think there is a tendency, for people on the left who consider themselves 'educated' and 'not crazy' to dismiss this extremist fringe. we want to believe we are 'better than this' and that even if violence and threats of violence is a method routinely used by the right, we shouldn't ever lower ourselves to their level. we believe that violence is never right, and we see it as something that will ultimately hurt the causes that we support. i've already talked about this in another post but back in the middle of my own shit storm, i was very hesitant to even say where all the hate i was receiving was coming from. i responded to some of the anons, but initially deleted all the ones i got which were explicitly referencing trans rights. i kept thinking that if i said anything, it would inevitably hurt the cause and reflect badly on all of those who fight for trans rights and acceptance online. because i think we all know that the left is held to a much higher standard than the right in terms of 'distancing' itself from the violence of its most extreme members. and that one anon can be enough to discredit the whole cause in the eyes of some people.

having however reflected on that, i think it's important to acknowledge that, despite what a lot of people on the left seem to think, this use of violence by the most extreme fringes of the left is actually not new. violence and violent threats aren't and have never been the monopoly of the right. historically, many social fights and injustices have been fought and won in blood by forces considered 'left' wing. i have also written about this. at the time, these forces were more focused on things like racial justice, territorial independence, and economic (socialist and communist) struggles, but they have existed, dating as far back as the french revolution. there is a very legitimate argument to be made that historically, violence is necessary to obtain social progress. this debate actually isn't as easy as simply saying: 'violence is never okay.'

the problem with anonymous online death threats, though, is that they aren't designed to fight for a cause, they are designed to scare the victim and obtain revenge. in war, there is a very real difference between dropping a bomb on a site filled with military supplies and killing ten soldiers as a collateral, and dropping a bomb on a family home and making the same number of victims. one is advancing your position in a conflict, the other scares a population into compliance.

with online death threats, it's all very similar. looking at the case at hand, which is trans activism, i don't believe that a single trans activist sending death threats to someone like JKR believes they will change her mind. what they want is to make her feel the way they feel, as trans people who are currently being threatened by transphobes. it is an understandable urge, a human urge, but it is the definition of wanting revenge and to incite fear.

additionally, with online death threats, there is the added factor that the victim of that fear, the person on the receiving end of the threat, is encouraged not to ever respond and/or talk/do anything about it. allegedly, because responding to the anon or retweeting the threat or interacting with it in any way only gives the threat more of an audience and 'attention.' secondly, if the person receiving the threat is famous/rich, because there is a power imbalance in terms of social media clout between the sender of the threat and the receiver. the typical example of this is, again, trans activists sending hate to JKR, her retweeting it, then transphobes going in to harass these accounts as a consequence. i've seen a lot of people argue that celebrities shouldn't be allowed to reblog tweet these threats because they are being unfair to the senders.

aside from the fact that arguing the latter point is absolutely INSANE and that if you're out there playing keyword warrior sending death threats to people you don't know you should be ready to face the consequences of your actions, this culture of secrecy only isolates victims of online hate more. when i ended up on the receiving end of death threats from trans activists myself and i responded to these threats, i received a lot of messages from my friends and followers expressing support. that made me feel less lonely. had i just deleted these from my inbox, i'd have been the only on seeing these, and thus not only scared but also lonely. this is why i am so opposed to this culture of secrecy.

but coming back to the original question, i believe that the problem with violent techniques we're seeing at the moment isn't that they're violent, it is the reason why violence is being invoked. when violence is only aimed at inciting fear and obtaining revenge, historically, there is evidence to the fact that that kind of violence does not work. this method has been trialled and tested by every authoritative government ever, and every single one has eventually failed. you always reach a point where fear isn't enough to prevent a rebellion. and the left loves this idea when it comes to uprisings and revolutions, but it forgets it as soon as it is trying to push for progress. because let me tell you: if you think you can scare transphobes into compliance, you are mistaken. just like they are mistaken when they think they can scare you into compliance.

because the issue is that fear does not breed social progress, it breeds hatred. and, as someone who actually still follows JKR on socials, i have seen this first-hand. the level of hatred she exhibits now towards trans people is on a completely different level, compared to the one expressed in the original essay in 2020. and this is because a) she in turn now feels the very human urge to get revenge and hurt those who hurt her but also b) being on the receiving end of such violence can actually give you the illusion that you are in the right. that you are the one being silenced and oppressed. it is undeniable that she has radicalised herself in her positions in the past four years, and i would argue that is in direct correlation to the amount of hate she has received.

and, putting the JKR issue to the side for a minute, it is also important to note that objectively speaking, these people sending death threats and pretending to be trans activists are fucking stupid. there, i've said it. because, even if you do want to scare people, even if you do believe in inciting fear, what the fuck are you doing sending death threats to Matt Mullenweg?! he's a tech CEO! have you seen the people who work in tech?? i'd say half his employees are LGBTQIA+. of course, he's not transphobic. just like i obviously am not. what are you doing sending death threats to ME for?! i'm a millennial idiot writing a semi-popular harry potter fanfiction on the internet - is this really who you're fighting this big social justice fight against? the level of cowardice disguised as courage is staggering. the merits of sending death threats to JKR are somewhat arguable given her level of power and funding and the fact that she is openly transphobic, but some of the targets these people pick make me think that they do not have two brain cells.

so, to answer the main question: is it right for trans activists to be sending online death threats to people they perceive as being transphobes right now? it's obviously not, but not because violence is wrong, but because this particular type of violence is stupid. and i think these people know this. because i think they're not really trans activists. they're people who are actively trying to sabotage the trans cause. they are people who don't see violence as a means to an end but as a thrill in itself. they aren't the climate activists who break into nuclear power plants to show their vulnerabilities and neutralise a couple of police officers to do it. they are the people who stay at the back of demonstrations with the intent of breaking everything, not to make a point but just for the hell of it. and there is also a very real possibility that these people are actually transphobes trying to make real trans activists look insane.

and this is what matters in all of this.

[beardedmrbean]

The cries of the people who have to repay their loans cus they spent all the money during the pandemic on clothes/food/cars/bullshit their cries are music to my ears

Got a friend that took advantage of the situation and paid theirs off a few years ahead of schedule, also for a couple months at one point took advantage of not having to worry about them when money got a little tight.

Very proud of them for pulling that off, there were some over payments on the monthly payments in order to go even faster at times, was a very responsible and good way to go, getting the debt gone and cutting total payments down because no interest accruing.

You'd be amazed at the number of degrees that qualify for student loan forgiveness, still got to pay some back, minimum payments for 10 years from the time payments start. So like my brother that did law school on $250,000+ in loans and grants will I think in the end pay 10% of that back and the rest goes poof because he's working in the public sector, public defender for a bit and legal council for some county now I think it is. Pay cut from not going to a firm but when you factor in the $225,000 not so much of a pay cut.

Less extreme options available and I'd love to see that program expanded not sure what all is involved in it but I bet there's places for it to grow that would provide a benefit both to the student and the public.

That said though I'm not gonna laugh at people that skipped out on payments that have to pay now because they bought food and clothes, depending on what those items were, not going to begrudge people a succulent Chinese meal and a pair of Levi's.

Iphone 87 on the other hand.........

You're an idiot and I will chuckle at you, folks that tried to catch up on others during the breather are different and not the ones you mentioned.

I still think the fed should get out of the student loan business and let the various colleges use their endowments to do the loans, it would lower enrollment and lean out administration and all that because if Pepperdine or yale or duke or any of them want to keep on going they need to churn out students with degrees that will allow them the ability to pay back their loans, so underwater feminist interpretive dance is canceled as a degree.

In the end the ones I'm laughing the most at would be the ones that squandered the opportunity because they actually believed that biden was going to forgive all of that debt, which anyone that had paid attention would have known

Peep the date too, this is more than a full year before the midterm elections, when team blue controlled both houses of congress and the white house.

nancy and joe knew, so did aoc and the rest of team democratic socialist knew I'll guarantee you that. That sat on that until they lost the house and then tried to lay the blame on everyone but themselves, wild how many people bought it too.

Funniest/saddest part of the whole thing is Justice Roberts quoting nancy in the majority opinion.

I may not be laughing at them but there is next to zero sympathy for them.

You got new rims for your car or something else frivolous then sucks to be you.

[queenshelby]

The Judge’s Daughter (Part One)

Featuring: Tommy Shelby x Virgin!Reader

Words: 8,700

 Warning: Angst, Blood, Gore, Mention of Suicide, Mention of Miscarriage, Drugs, Racism, Smut

Tag List:

@lilymurphy03  @deefigs @theflamecrystal  @chrisevanshoeee  @desperate-and-broken  @weepingstudentfishhorse  @captivatedbycillianmurphy  @fookingshelby  @livinginfantaxy  @rosey1981  @atomicsoulcollecto  @peakyboyslover  @nerdy4itall  @elenavampire21  @hanster1998  @mariapaiva13  @fairypitou  @harry-is-my-sunflower  @zozeebo  @lauren-raines-x

………

 Challenging Times

In early 1930, times were hard. The Wall Street crash in 1929 caused many men to lose their fortune. Your family had also lost money on the stock exchange. A lot of money.

Your father was a wealthy judge and now, he was just a judge. Your family home had to be sold and your father moved into a medium sized apartment in London with one of his maids.

Since your mother had passed away in 1920, your father had often sought comfort in his employees. There was one maid in particular who was of interest to him. Her name was Catherine and she was 10 years your father’s junior.

You accepted his relationship with her but soon felt uncomfortable to live with them in the London Apartment.

But your father wasn’t the only family member who lost his fortune in the stock market crash. Your brother had also lost a lot of money. So much money that he could not repay his gambling debt to one of London’s most notorious criminals.

As a result, your brother committed suicide. His mental health had always been troubled ever since he’s been to France, fighting for England in the First World War. Your brother was much older than you and it was almost a miracle when your mother fell pregnant again and gave birth to you after three miscarriages.

Your brother adored you and protected you whenever necessary. He was kind hearted but, unfortunately, got himself involved with the wrong people on several occasions which is when he began gambling.  

Following your brother’s death, your father struck a deal with the man to whom the gambling debt was owed, releasing three of his gang members from prison.

The debt was forgiven and you inherited your brother’s small cottage north of London.  Regardless of your father’s actions, he began to despise criminals who involved themselves in illegal gambling activities. Your father was known to be particularly harsh when it came to offences of this kind.

He once told you a story about a man who used to be a prominent criminal who made his fortune through race fixing and illegal gambling activities. That man was now a member of parliament and your father despised him.

Being Jewish, your father’s hate for this man increased even more when he became the deputy leader of the British Union of Fascists.

The man’s name was Thomas Shelby and you met him once at a gala organised by the socialist party in Westminster. He was a smart man but he was also extremely rude and insulted your father at the gala following a dispute they had earlier in the day.

Your father threatened him and told him that, one day, he will ensure his downfall. It was your father’s mission and it was dangerous.

With that threat in mind and heated political events unfolding around the country, your father asked you to move to the countryside. Take up your brother’s cottage and lay low until things were taking a turn.

It took you quite some time to build up the courage to move into the house where your brother took his own life. But, you eventually did, taking up your brother’s work at the property while attending nursing school every second week.

The cottage was free standing but behind a larger house owned by wealthy Londoners. Their wealth seemed to have been unaffected by the stock market crash and, just as your brother did, you attended their yards and animals on the small farm in exchange for a wage and free food from the produce.

You also spent some time renovating the cottage which was rather dated.

The cottage had two bedrooms, one of which you converted entirely to a studio for your paintings. You enjoyed painting and you were quite good at it.

The other bedroom you redecorated with your own furniture.

The downstairs area consisted out of a small living room with a fire place and a small kitchen and bathroom.

It wasn’t much, but it was a place you could call your own. It was home.

Initially following your move, you would travel to London occasionally to visit your father and his mistress. You wondered when he would finally propose to her. She had been waiting for years.

When you visited, you would often sit in one of his open hearings. You were quite interested in the political and legal situation in the country especially following recent events.  

Notably, it has been six weeks since the assassination attempt on Oswald Mosley, the leader of the British Union of Fascists.

Being Jewish yourself, you, just like your father, despised fascism.

The event at which the assassination attempt occurred was visited by many Jews, protesting against the establishment of the party and their obscure ideas. Despite your father’s instructions not to get involved, you were one of the protestors on the day and, although not openly, you have been associating yourself with the communists.

Your newfound friend Jesse Eden had since led several more protests you attended. Being only 20 years young, you believed that you could make a difference and convince people that their support for fascism was wrong and immoral.

The problem was that your father was at the centre of it all.

Following the assassination attempt on Oswald Mosley, two Jews were arrested and appeared in your father’s court. The prosecution didn’t have enough evidence for a conviction and the men walked free.

No one really knew who was behind the assassination attempt. There were no witnesses and everyone who may have witnessed the attack had since been found dead.

Regardless of this, for some reason, the leaders of the British Union of Fascists seem to have believed that a Jewish man by the name of Alfie Solomons was behind the attack. But there was one little problem, Alfie Solomon was dead. Or wasn’t he?

The men that were arrested used to work for Alfie Solomons and took the fall until your father set them free for lack of evidence.

A week after this decision, a Jewish owned factory was bombed. The factory was owned by the men who were set free by your father and a company owned by a Trust.

Ten men were killed and, following some arrests, it became evident that Jimmy McCavern was behind the attack.

Jimmy McCavern was the leader of the Billy Boys and, over the course of another week, your father was able to make a connection through some documents admitted to evidence between Jimmy McCavern, Alfie Solomons and a man named Thomas Shelby who was the deputy leader of the British Union of Fascists.

An arrest warrant was issued against Jimmy McCavern and Thomas Shelby by the London police following your father’s advice to them. Since, apparently, Alfie Solomons was dead, no arrest warrant could be made against him.

Thomas Shelby was the first member of parliament who was subject to such warrant and your father may have just, like this, gotten himself a lot of enemies.

The men he had against him now were not only the Billy Boys but also the Peaky Blinders and it was too dangerous for you to continue to visit him in London.

Unfortunately, little did you know that the danger was about to lurk just in front of your doorstep.

An Unexpected Visit

It was a Wednesday evening at 8pm that you heard a rather loud knock on the front door of your cottage.

You didn’t expect anyone and approached the door with your loaded gun. It’s not that you had ever shot a gun, but you bought yourself one two days ago just in case you needed it.

‘Who is it?’ you asked from behind the closed door.

‘It’s Jesse Eden’ you’ve heard from behind the door and you immediately recognised Jesse’s voice.

You put the gun aside and unlocked the door.

To your surprise, Jesse wasn’t alone and your chin dropped as you saw the man standing right in front of you. You remembered him. He was the man who stood beside Oswald Mosley during his speech in Birmingham and you had met him before at a gala at Westminster.

His name was Thomas Shelby.

‘I think we have met before Miss Rosenberg’ Tommy said.

‘Yes, we have Mr Shelby’ you said nervously and frightened at the same time. You immediately wondered whether Jesse was under duress by him. Why otherwise would he be here with her you wondered.

You invited them both inside after Jesse made the request to come in. She wasn’t sure whether they had been followed.

To your surprise, Jesse soon told you that she required your help. According to her, Thomas Shelby had to lay low due to the arrest warrant issued by the London police.

If Thomas Shelby was to be arrested, he may be killed in prison before a hearing could be conducted.

Accordingly, Jesse asked you to hide him at your house until the charges against him are dropped.

‘You mean until the chief of police has been bribed enough to drop the charges?’ you chuckled in response to her request.

‘I wish it would be that easy Love’ Tommy said as he looked at the pictures on your living room wall. His hands were in his pockets and he almost looked unbothered by the situation.

‘You cannot be serious Jesse. You seriously want me to hide this man at my house?’ you said in disbelieve.  

‘I am afraid I am serious Y/N’ Jesse responded.

‘Well, a fascist hiding at the house of a Jew, how ironic’ you said angrily, still unsure why Jesse was helping him.

‘I know we have gotten off on the wrong foot at the Westminster gala Miss Rosenberg, but I would greatly appreciate your help’ Tommy said, recalling his argument with your father in your presence in late 1929.

‘You think Mr Shelby?’ you chuckled. ‘You insulted my father and my entire family’ you said.

‘And for that, I apologise’ Tommy said politely but firmly.

‘Jesse, you need to explain to me why you are helping this man. I do not understand it’ you said.

‘I cannot give you more information Y/N. You just need to trust me on this, alright?’ Jesse asked almost fearfully.

‘Alright, but why me?’ you pondered.

‘Because you are the daughter of the judge hearing this matter. No one will think to look for me here, at your house’ Tommy explained.

‘Jesus’ was all you could respond with to Tommy’s comment.

‘Y/N, trust me, please. It’s for the cause’ Jesse said.

‘I find this hard to believe, but alright, he can stay’ you responded.

Not long after you agreed to house the deputy leader of the British Union of Fascists, Thomas Shelby, Jesse made her way back to Birmingham. It was a three-hour drive and she had to hurry before anyone became suspicious.

‘You will have to sleep on the lounge. Please help yourself to any food, water and drinks’ you said while you walked into another room to fetch a blanket, pillow and change of clothes for Tommy.

You still held on to your brother’s clothes which should have fitted Thomas just fine.

‘I thank you for your hospitality Miss Rosenberg and I apologise for intruding your space. I should be out of your hair within the week’ Tommy said as you came back to the living room and handed him everything he needed for his stay.

‘I am doing this for Jesse, not for you Mr Shelby. Although I do not quite understand why she is helping you’ you said just before you sat down in one of the arm chairs.

‘Let’s just say, we had a thing once, eh’ Tommy smirked.

‘I didn’t think that she would fall for a man like you’ you said.

‘A man like me, eh?’ Tommy chuckled.

‘Yes, a socialist turning to fascism. It’s rather disappointing’ you said.

‘Sometimes we do what we have to do Miss Rosenberg’ Tommy said.

‘Yes, if we didn’t, you wouldn’t be staying here, trust me’ you said before excusing yourself.

You made your way to your studio, painting and drinking wine. It was what you enjoyed most and you wanted to space from the stranger now living with you in the small cottage. A man you had literally nothing in common with and who you despised.

While you were painting, Tommy made use of your telephone and enjoyed some of your late brother’s whiskey.

It was obvious to you that he was struggling with being cooped up in your cottage and, just as your thoughts got lost in your paintings, you heard some a cracking noise near the door of your studio.

‘What are you doing?’ you asked as you noticed Tommy walking into your studio, looking through your many paintings.

‘You are talented. These paintings are extraordinary’ Tommy said.

‘Thank you, Mr Shelby’ you said with surprise. Had he really just complimented you?

His presence and closeness sent shivers down your spine. It wasn’t that you were frightened but you were clearly intimidated.

‘What are your plans, Miss Rosenberg?’ Tommy asked as he kept looking through the paintings.

‘My plans?’ you asked.

‘Your plans for the future? What are they?’ Tommy asked.

‘I am studying to become a nurse. Perhaps, one day get married and have children. The usual’ you said shyly.

‘Well, let me tell you, marriage is overrated’ Tommy chuckled before he asked how old you were.

‘I am 20’ you responded.

‘Still young with a life of opportunities ahead of you. Don’t waste them on the cause’ Tommy said.

‘Coming from a man who wastes his political career on fascism’ you said, causing Tommy to chuckle.

Your comment instantly sparked a political debate between you and Tommy which soon erupted into a heated argument.

During the argument he told you that you were too young to understand, ignorant and naïve and you were keen to throw him out of your house right then and there.

But, you bit your tongue and reminded yourself of the promise you made to Jesse.

You couldn’t stand him and his arrogance any longer and went to your bedroom, leaving him to debate about politics with himself.

Things Must Change

The next morning, you woke up early to attend the garden, ignoring Tommy as you left the house.

But, it wasn’t long until Tommy joined you in the garden. It was obvious to you that he was clearly bored.

‘What happened to the people who lived at the large house over there?’ Tommy asked as he walked outside to have a cigarette. You didn’t allow him to smoke inside the house.

‘They are in France for their annual vacation. Apparently, their fortune was unaffected by the stock market crash’ you responded.

‘Lucky them eh’ Tommy grinned as he grabbed some of the leather gardening cloves and a bucket from the side of the house.

Wearing his expensive suit and with the bucket in his hand and a cigarette in his mouth he walked over to the berry bushes where you were standing.

‘I might as well make myself useful eh’ he said jokingly as he began picking some berries.

‘Uhm yeah…but these aren’t ripe’ you giggled as you observed Tommy picking off some of the raspberries.

‘Right. Well, I usually don’t garden’ Tommy chuckled.

‘I couldn’t tell’ you laughed, causing Tommy to smile back at you.

This was the first time you noticed him smile. It was a gentle smile and it suited him.

Tommy helped you in the garden for the remainder of the day. It wasn’t like he had something else to do other than make phone calls to his brother and someone by the name of Kent.

You managed to keep your arguments to a minimum and you started to worry that you were slowly beginning to enjoy his company.

Later that evening, following dinner, you even sat down together in front of the fireplace in the living room to drink whiskey and wine and make some conversation.

‘I have been checking on your calls, contacting the directory because I wanted to make sure that I am safe with you being here. I have been told that the last call from my number was made to the Crown Investigations Office’ you said with surprise as you poured Tommy a glass of whiskey. After everything that happened in the past, you still didn’t trust him.

‘That’s correct’ Tommy said.

‘The only reason I could think of as to why you were talking to an officer of the Crown while you have an arrest warrant against you is if you were working for the Crown yourself. Otherwise, you would be mad tipping them’ you said.

‘I was just trading information that might be useful. In exchange, I am hoping for the arrest warrant against me to be dropped’ Tommy explained.

‘Mr Shelby, do you actually believe in fascism? I have not heard you speak about your party’s ideals since you’ve been here. We spoke about politics but you still seem to be a socialist at heart. So tell me, why do you follow this mad man Mosely? I am curious’ you said.

‘The thing about political parties is that they take the course into the direction in which they are steered. Much like a car. But just like with a car, if you fill it with the wrong fuel and the engine breaks down as a result, you will be going nowhere’ Tommy said as he took a drink.

‘And you are the fuel Mr Shelby?’ you asked with curiosity.

‘Yes, I am the fuel Miss Rosenberg’ he said.

‘Your intention is to undermine Mosley on behalf of the Crown. Jesse knew and this is why she helped you, isn’t it?’ you said after pondering on about what Tommy had just told you.

‘And now that you know this as well, it makes you my accomplice. I might be able to use your help Miss Rosenberg’ Tommy said.  

‘If it helps to end fascism, perhaps I am willing to give it’ you said with a smile. ‘But I am curious now Mr Shelby. Was it you who initiated the attack on Mosley?’ you asked.

‘I rather not answer Miss Rosenberg’ Tommy said.

‘I understand. Also, you can call me Y/N now that we aren’t enemies after all’ you said.

‘Alright Y/N, then I insist that you call me Tommy’ he responded.

After some more conversation you decided that it was time for you to make your way to bed. It was late and you had to get up early to attend the animals.

Nightmares

Falling asleep that night was easy. You felt much safer now despite Tommy’s presence. You knew he wasn’t going to harm you.

But just as easy as you had fallen asleep, you were woken up by a loud noise coming from the living room at 1am.

‘Tommy, are you alright?’ you asked worryingly as you walked downstairs in a haste, wearing nothing but your silk nightgown.

‘My apologies, I didn’t intend to wake you’ Tommy said as he sat on the lounge, covered in sweat.

You initially thought that he might haven gotten sick until you saw a small empty bottle on the living room table. Your brother used to have one just like it which he carried around everywhere. It contained Liquid Opium and helped him sleep. He took it every night until, one day, he stopped. The withdrawal was barely manageable and his addiction soon rebounded.

You knew what this was. You had seen it before.

‘I will make you some tea to help you sleep’ you said kindly as you observed Tommy’s struggles.

‘I don’t think that tea will help me sleep Love’ Tommy chuckled.

‘My brother used to have nightmares after France. When he returned home, my mother made this for him and he managed to get at least some sleep. It’s worth a try’ you said with a warm smile. You knew Tommy had been to France. You had spoken about it when you spoke about your brother earlier that evening.  

‘I suppose why not, eh’ Tommy said as he walked to the bathroom to clean himself off with a cold wet flannel.

After you put on the kettle, you walked to the studio and grabbed some more of your brother’s clothes.

‘These should fit you’ you said shyly as you handed Tommy a clean plain shirt and pants.

‘Thank you, Y/N’ he said as he took the clothes.

This was the first time you saw Tommy without a shirt and, despite his level of exhaustion, it was quite a sight. He certainly was a very attractive man.

After Tommy had gotten himself changed, you sat down next to him and handed him the cup of tea.

‘Do you want to talk?’ you asked.

‘It’s the middle of the night Y/N, you should get some sleep’ Tommy said.

‘It’s alright. I am not tired’ you said with a warm smile.

That night Tommy spoke with you about everything. About France and his late wife Grace who visited him in his dreams. He didn’t know why, but he felt as though he could talk to you and trust you.

At 4am, you eventually fell asleep on the lounge next to Tommy which is where you woke up the next morning covered with a warm blanket.

The fire was lid and there was a note on the coffee table as you woke.

‘Borrowed your hunting rifle, will be back by 8’ the note said.

You didn’t know how to hunt and had been telling Tommy how your brother shot bucks whenever you came to visit him at the cottage from London. You would then prepare it with veggies from the garden just the way your mother had shown you.

You thought that, perhaps, Tommy was better equipped than you when it came to hunting. You struggled enough even just to slaughter a chook from the farm and your intake of meat was clearly lacking as a result.

Attacked

With Tommy gone, you decided to attend to the horses. Grabbing your shovel and rake, you walked into the stables.

But, just as you walked inside, you could hear a loud noise from behind the barn.

You wondered whether it was Tommy and approached the back area of the property carefully. After all, he had a loaded gun and you certainly didn’t want to get shot accidently.

Just as you walked to the side of the property, you saw a strange man.

‘Hello Love’ the man said, cocking his gun.

‘Who are you and what do you want?’ you asked holding on to your rake tightly.

‘We’ve got a dispute to settle with some Jews Love. Now be a good girl and put down this rake would you’ the man said firmly.

You obliged and the man approached you slowly.

‘Now Love, we will be having a good time and then we will visit your father’ the man said just before he called for another man who was at the back of the barn.

Within an instant, the man grabbed your wrists and pushed you against the outer wall of the barn.

‘Such are pretty thing aren’t you’ the man said as he aimed to cover your mouth while moving away your skirt.

But, just when the man’s hand reached your mouth, you bit him firmly just before yelling for help.

‘You fucking bitch’ the man said as he reached for his gun.

In this moment, you heard a shot. The other man was hit, but barely and went to check out where the shot came from.

With both men distracted, you ceased the moment and pulled out the gardening scissors you were carrying in your thin jacket. Within an instant and without thinking, you rammed the scissor into the neck of the man who was still standing right there in front of you.

This was all it took for the man to fall to the ground. You couldn’t help it but scream as your hands and blouse were covered in the man’s blood.

You were besides yourself, sitting on the ground next to his dying body in shock, unable to do anything.

After what felt like an eternity, you saw Tommy approach you, making his way through the veggie patch carrying your hunting rifle and covered in blood himself.

‘Are you alright Y/N?’ he asked as he kneeled down next to you, comforting you.

‘There is another man Tommy, he walked to towards the berry field’ you said.

‘I know. He’s dead now and so is the third man who was driving them here’ Tommy said.

‘Did you kill them?’ you asked.

‘Yes, I did’ he said and, just in that moment, you threw his arms around him.

This is when you realised that he had been injured and was in agony himself.

‘Tommy, you’ve been shot’ you said with worry as you saw blood staining through his white shirt.

‘Yes’ was all he managed to say at this point as he was losing blood.

‘We will get you to a hospital’ you said in a haste.

‘No hospital Y/N. I will be taken into custody if I set foot in a public place like this until the arrest warrant has been dropped’ Tommy said.

You could see the agony on his face as he held onto the side of his chest. He was in pain. A lot of pain.

‘You are nurse, aren’t you?’ Tommy asked, breathing heavily.

‘I am a student nurse Tommy. I have not practiced on a life person’ you said worryingly.

‘Well, it’s about time then eh’ Tommy chuckled.

‘Tommy, you can’t be serious’ you said.

‘I am serious Y/N. I need you to do this, please’ Tommy said.

‘Alright, common’ you said nervously. It wasn’t like you had a choice. Tommy was bleeding a lot and his wound needed attention immediately.

With haste, you walked inside with Tommy and placed a towel over the lounge and got your first aid kit as well as a bottle of vodka from the dining room.  You then went to the bathroom quickly to get a bowl of clean water and more towels.  

While you were getting everything ready, Tommy made a phone call to his brother Arthur, giving him your address. By that point, Tommy was barely able to stand up.

As you returned from the kitchen, you helped Tommy to remove his blood-soaked clothes.

You gasped for a moment. You weren’t sure whether the blood or the sight of his naked body took away your breath.

‘You’ve got whiskey?’ Tommy asked.

‘Tommy, I don’t think it matters which alcohol I use to clean out your wound’ you said as you got everything ready on the table.

‘To drink. Trust me, I’ll need it. I am out of Opium’ he said, his breathing still laboured.

‘Yes, of course’ you said before you poured him a large glass of whiskey and handed it to him.

He drank all of it in an instant before lying down.

‘This is going to hurt’ you said as you cleaned your hands and the tweezers from your first aid kit with some of the vodka.

‘I know’ he said, taking in a deep breath.

‘You have to stay still’ you went on as you reached for his wound which was still profusely pouring blood.

‘I know’ he said again before closing his eyes and holding on to the edge of the lounge in anticipation.

As soon as you entered the wounds with your fingers and the tweezers, all that you could hear was a loud grunt.

‘Fuck’ Tommy screamed as your fingers went in deeper, retrieving the bullet from his wound. By this point, you were breathing as heavily as him.

‘I’ve got it Tommy, don’t move now’ you said as you carefully pulled the bullet out of his flesh.

Tommy took in a deep breath and, with another loud grunt, you dislodged the bullet.

It was intact and you sighed with relief while Tommy opened his eyes, looking at you in agony.

‘Now I will clean up the wound and stitch it, alright?’ you asked, causing Tommy to nod.

He let out another loud grunt as you poured some of the vodka over his wound before handing him a clean towel to apply pressure to the wound while you prepared the stitches.

His face was expressionless when you placed the stitches. You knew that the worst pain was over but, nonetheless, you were surprised by how well he had handled it.

This was when you noticed several large scars across his chest and arms. Almost too many to count.

‘You have been shot before, haven’t you?’ you asked while Tommy looked almost relaxed when you placed the sixth stitch.

‘Just a few times’ he smirked.

While you placed the last stitch, you could hear a car pull up in front of your door.

You opened the door quickly before applying a bandage around Tommy’s chest.

‘Fucking Hell Brother’ Arthur shouted as he walked into the living room with Isiah.

‘Arthur, this is Y/N’ Tommy said by way of introduction.

You quickly shook Arthur’s hand by which he was rather surprised.

‘Who the fuck did this?’ Arthur asked.

‘The Billy Boys. But they weren’t after me. They were after her’ Tommy explained.

‘Why?’ Arthur asked.

‘Because she is the daughter of the judge hearing the McCaven matter. I assume they wanted to send a message’ Tommy said.

‘Did they see you?’ Arthur asked.

‘Yes, but it doesn’t matter. They are dead’ Tommy responded.

‘Alright, what do you want us to do with the bodies? Send a message?’ Arthur asked.

‘Burry them behind the property. This never happened. They just disappeared and never made it here. By the time McCaven finds out the arrest warrants will be dropped and I can deal with the situation and Mosley’ Tommy instructed.

Arthur and Isiah attended the bodies as instructed by Tommy. You were surprised how quickly and efficiently they made the bodies disappear without any evidence whatsoever. It was clear to you that they had done this kind of thing before.

Before they left, Tommy gave Arthur a note to give to Jesse Eden and a note to give to a person named Kent.

In return Arthur gave Tommy three guns, a change of clothes and a bottle of opium.

After Arthur and Isiah had left, you made sure that Tommy was resting. After all, he had lost a lot of blood and you didn’t want him to pull a stitch.

Tender Moments

‘Do you have any more of that tea?’ Tommy asked as he held on to the bottle of opium that Arthur had given him. He starred at it, but didn’t open it.

‘Yes, sure. I will make some’ you said.

You were surprised by Tommy’s request but didn’t dare to argue.

You sat down next to him to have some tea while he placed the bottle of opium on the table in front of him.

‘Tommy, don’t’ you said.

‘Don’t what?’ he asked.

‘The opium, don’t take it’ you said.

‘Well, then put it away somewhere I cannot find it eh’ Tommy said as he handed you the bottle and you obliged with his request.

Tommy knew he would be regretting this soon, at night when his nightmares would wake him once again. It wasn’t the pain he couldn’t handle, but rather it was Grace’s visits in his dreams and dreaming about France hat destroyed him.

He was afraid of going to sleep but he needed sleep badly especially after today and so did you.

‘Are you not going to sleep?’ Tommy asked as clock struck midnight and you were still there with him talking about matters which he never talked to anyone about. He felt like he could confine in you and, despite your young age, you understood and you cared.

‘I don’t think I can. Not after what happened today. Not after what I have done’ you said as tears were building up in your eyes for the third time that evening.

‘Y/N, listen to me, alright?’ he said, caressing your face gently.

‘What you have done saved your life. These men were here to hurt you and now they can’t. You are safe now’ Tommy said as tears began to run down your cheek.

‘I killed someone Tommy’ you said in disarray.

‘You killed a bad man’ Tommy said as he used his thumbs to wipe away your tears.

‘It’s still a man Tommy’ you said before pressing your head against his chest. ‘Will the picture of him ever leave my head?’ you asked.

‘No Y/N, it won’t. But your guilt will, that I promise’ Tommy said. ‘Now, let’s get you some rest, eh?’ Tommy said.

‘Will you come with me Tommy?’ you asked nervously, knowing that your question was somewhat unusual.

‘Come with you? To bed?’ Tommy asked with surprise.

‘Yes, just to sleep by my side. I am scared Tommy’ you said.

‘I never had a woman ask me to join her in her bed simply for the purpose of sleeping, but alright, I suppose I can do that’ Tommy smirked before he followed you upstairs.

As Tommy lied down next you, bandaged up and wearing not much more than his white undergarments, you could feel something unusual. It was almost like some sort of warmth which was flowing through your chest.

‘Do you want me to turn off the light?’ Tommy asked as he got comfortable on the large white pillow, facing you and starring into your dark eyes.

‘Not yet. Perhaps we could talk for a little longer’ you said as you looked into his comforting blue eyes.

‘Alright, what you want to talk about?’ he asked and this is when you brought up his current wife Lizzie and his children.

‘What about your wife and children, where are they?’ you asked.

‘They are in Scotland, where, apparently they are safe from all this and from myself’ Tommy said with some disappointment.

‘From yourself? But they are your children’ you asked with some confusion.

‘They are, but they are indeed safer without me until I sort things out’ Tommy explained.

‘Do you miss your wife’ you asked.

‘No, I do not miss my wife. She filed for divorce six weeks ago’ Tommy said.

‘You do not seem upset about it. Why is that?’ you asked.

‘Because I know that it’s the right thing to do, to keep her safe. Our relationship was never one made of love. I never loved her the way a husband should love his wife. But, she is mother of my daughter and she cares deeply for my son. I trust her. She’s always been loyal to me and to the Company’ Tommy explained.

‘That’s nice…to have someone like this in your life’ you said.

‘It is indeed. Now you should get some rest eh’ Tommy said as he turned off the bedside lamp.

To his surprise, as soon as he turned off the light, you leaned over towards him carefully and rested your head on the uninjured side of his chest.

He let you and wrapped his arm around you, pulling you close until you drifted off to sleep.

This was the first time for Thomas Shelby since he came back from France that he shared a bed with a woman other than his wife who didn’t have any sexual interactions with. To his surprise, despite the pain after having been shot, he slept better than he had expected. In the absence of nightmares, he was well rested until, after five hours of sleep, the next morning you heard a loud bang on the door.

Taking a Turn

You walked downstairs again with your loaded gun in your hand.

‘Who is it?’ you asked as you approached the door carefully.

‘Jesse Eden’ the person said and you quickly opened the door while Tommy came walking downstairs, out of your bedroom.

‘I actually just came here to make sure you didn’t kill each other but it looks like you’ve managed to become acquainted’ Jesse giggled.

‘It’s not what it looks like’ you said as Tommy walked out of your bedroom wearing nothing but his undergarments.

‘I assume Tommy has informed you about our past relations. But, for the record, I no longer have any interest in the man, so it’s quite alright with me if it is what looks like Y/N’ Jesse laughed.

‘You are no longer interested, eh?’ Tommy said to Jesse with a cheeky smile.

‘Unless you have forgotten, you ended up marrying someone else’ Jesse said.

‘Should I give you two some privacy?’ you asked as you felt uncomfortable being caught in between their conversation about old times.

‘No Y/N, there is no need eh Jesse?’ Tommy said with a laugh.

‘No there is not. Arthur came to see me last night to give me your note. But he hadn’t said anything about you having been injured’ Jesse said.  

‘It’s alright, she’s a nurse. I got lucky’ Tommy chuckled.

‘Well, I am glad because I have information from one of my informants that will be of interest to you now that you are still alive. The Crown prosecutor was removed from the case and so was the chief of police. Apparently, it was found out that they both involved themselves with illegal prostitutes at some of your brothels’ Jesse said.

‘Now that is interesting, isn’t it?’ Tommy smirked.

‘You obviously knew and blackmailed them. The man in charge of the matter is now your friend Lawrence Staghill who, I believe, is filing for a motion to dismiss for lack of evidence in front of the judge who still owes you a lot of money. So, it looks like that everything is going to plan for you once again Thomas Shelby OBE. You should be free to leave after the next three days. The case is to be heard after the weekend’ Jesse said.

‘You hear that? Three more days and I will be out of your hair Y/N’ Tommy said.

‘I can’t wait’ you said cheekily and with a hint of sarcasm.

Jesse stayed for a little while longer before heading back to Birmingham and you made sure that, for the entire day, Tommy rested.

It was hard for Tommy to rest. It was almost like he needed to do something at all times. He wasn’t a man who could ever just sit still and, say, read a book. His mind had to busy constantly and he loved to be challenged.

For you, the day went by quickly and looking after Tommy was almost like looking after a child who refuses to listen.

Gone Too Far

‘I see you made yourself a bed on the sofa again’ you said as you noticed Tommy putting the blanket and pillow on the sofa.

‘Whilst I enjoyed our pillow talk, I figured that last night was an exception. Unless you think you might have difficulty sleeping again’ Tommy smirked.

‘I think I just might’ you said with a smile as you finished brushing your hair.

‘Alright, I will take my pillow and blanket upstairs then eh’ Tommy said.

‘Alright, see you up there’ you smiled, causing Tommy to chuckle.

This was strange indeed, but he figured that, at least, the bed was more comfortable than the lounge.

‘So, what do you want to talk about tonight, eh?’ Tommy asked as you walked into the bedroom with a glass of water and two white pills.

‘I went to the chemist today. This should prevent infection’ you said you said as you handed him the glass and the tablets.

‘Thank you’ Tommy said as you lied down next to him.

He swallowed the tablets and waited for you to say something, start a conversation of some sort.

But you didn’t. You lied there quietly, your dark eyes gazing over his half naked body.

In this moment, he didn’t know what came over him but, just as he leaned to lie on his uninjured side, he ran his hands through your hair and his eyes met yours.

‘I haven’t met anyone quite like you’ Tommy said.

‘Why is that?’ you asked.

‘I am not sure. There is something about you that intrigues me. That doesn’t happen very often’ Tommy said and, just as he did, you leaned forward and your lips met his.

His lips were soft and still tasted like whiskey.

Reluctantly at first, he returned the kiss, gently but passionately.

It was a short kiss and your tongues never touched by the time you lips drifted apart.

Once your lips separated you starred at each other, questioning in your mind what had just happened between you.

With embarrassment, you pulled away and turned around quickly.

‘Goodnight Tommy’ you said after you turned around. You turned off the night light and pulled your blanket over you tightly.

‘Goodnight Y/N’ Tommy said with a slight chuckle, still facing into your direction.

Despite the fact that Tommy had been on your mind now for days, you were surprised by your own actions and wanted to pretend that the kiss between you just moments ago didn’t happen.

You knew about his past, the killings, the illegal businesses, everything. He was a man you knew you shouldn’t get involved with. He was also still married and, at least in the eye of the public, he was a fascist.

You tried very hard to ignore the fact that he was lying next to you, half naked. The fire was lightening the room slightly and you simply couldn’t close your eyes, starring to the other end of the room.

For ten minutes you tried to lie still, but couldn’t. You fidgeted and kept starring up and then to the side again.

‘Do you want me to help you go to sleep?’ Tommy asked as he noticed your restlessness, which instantly broke the silence between you.

‘Help me go to sleep?’ you asked with some confusion and without turning around to face him. You were still to embarrassed to look at him.

‘Yes’ Tommy said as, suddenly, you could feel his body moving closer towards yours but still separated by your individual blankets.

‘What do you mean by that Tommy?’ you asked with some ignorance and, just when you did, you could feel the back of your blanket lift slightly.

Within seconds, Tommy’s fingers trailed over your bare shoulders downwards over your small breasts which were covered by nothing but your silk nightgown.

Your nipple turned hard instantly at his touch and you let out a deep sigh.

‘Tommy, I have never been with anyone before’ you said, allowing his touch but worrying about what he was intending to do to you.

‘Don’t worry Love, I am not going to fuck you. At least not in the conventional way’ Tommy chuckled as his fingers circled over your hard nipples.

You had no idea what he could possibly mean by that. Did he not find you attractive? What was he going to do to you then if not that?

‘So, you don’t want me?’ you asked curiously while small moans escaped your lips as the tips of his fingers continued to run circles over your nipples.

‘I want you alright. But I am not keen on tearing my stitches’ Tommy said as his hands began to take hold of your breasts harder.

You moaned at his touch and felt a strange and unfamiliar sensation build up in between your legs.

It wasn’t long until you felt his fingers move downwards over your stomach until they finally began teasing the top of your mound through your panties.

‘Tommy, I don’t think I will be going to sleep with you touching me like this’ you said with heavy breath.  You wondered how on earth this was actually going to help you go to sleep.

‘I hope not’ Tommy laughed quietly. ‘But once I am done with you, you will sleep very well, that I promise’ he whispered into your before biting your earlobe gently.

You took in a deep breath and moaned quietly. The feeling of his hot breath was intense.

‘So do you want me to continue?’ he whispered.

You couldn't say yes. But you also couldn't say no. Instead, all that escaped your lips was another soft moan.

‘I need to hear you say it Love. Tell me you want me to keep going’ he said.

You whimpered under his touch, your hips now rocking to meet his hand. But he held firm.

‘I...it feels really good’ was all you could manage to say.

‘And you want me to continue?’ he asked as his fingers moved a little lower, over your panties, expertly brushing over your clit.  

‘Yes Tommy, please continue’ you moaned and, just like that, Tommy slit his hand beneath your panties, running his fingers directly over your wet slit, dipping only the top of them into you gently.

He then began to rub his wet finger tips over your clit, circling around your hard nub with light pressure.

‘Oh my god Tommy’ you moaned as you never felt anything just like that.

After a minute or two, Tommy gently slid one finger into you, looking out for any cues from you to ensure that he didn’t hurt you now that he knew that you were a virgin.

You were so tight, it was almost too much to start and he could feel the resistance of your hymen within you. But he kept going, carefully and gently thrusting his finger in and out of you at a slow pace.

You moaned softly and Tommy loved pulling a reaction out of you. It was almost like it was his goal to break your normally stoic composure.

Tommy wanted to know that you were enjoying what he was doing.

He began sliding his finger in and out of you all the way slowly at first, but not long after he started to build speed.

You enjoyed the alternating feeling between emptiness and fulness inside of you and were making the most delicious noises now. Your eyes were completely closed and you were moaning louder.

Suddenly Tommy slipped a second finger inside of you just to give you a little extra jolt and you reacted better than he could have expected.

It was slightly painful at first but the mild pain soon subsided and turned into pleasure.

‘Tommy, oh god...fuck’ you moaned as you began squirming just slightly and moaning a bit louder.

As his fingers kept thrusting in and out of you, your breathing became heavier and your legs began to quiver.

His thumb soon gave extra attention to your clit while he kept up with the movement of his middle and index finger.

Your moans kept getting more frequent now and you were certainly getting wetter too as Tommy kept going faster and harder.

You couldn’t believe how good he was making you feel with his fingers but you also didn’t know what to expect when an overwhelming sensation of warmth and tingling overcame you slowly.

‘Tommy, I don’t know if this is right. It feels strange’ you moaned as your legs began to shake and you couldn’t control your movements.

You tried to squirm away as the feeling was too unfamiliar to you. But Tommy persisted, pushing his hand firmer against you and his fingers even deeper inside of you.

‘Does it feel good?’ Tommy asked, knowing already what your answer would be as he could feel your walls tightening around his fingers.

‘Yes Tommy’ you managed to let out in between moans.

‘Then its right Love’ Tommy smirked. ‘Just relax and let go eh’ Tommy whispered.

You moaned once again, louder than before, and gave into the sensation.

It was intense, so intense that you had to clench onto the sheets and, just like this your orgasm washed over you.

You were a shaking mess and Tommy kept up the speed with his fingers until your orgasm slowly began to subside.

‘Fuck, what the hell just happened?’ you said once you began to calm down and while Tommy still stroked the outside of your now soaked mound.

‘Did you never have an orgasm before?’ Tommy asked surprised and with curiosity.

‘Like this? No. Never’ you said. Of course, you pleasured yourself before but the sensation was different, way less intense than what Tommy just managed to do to you.

As Tommy removed his hand from you, you turned around, your cheeks flushed. It was almost like you were embarrassed to look at him after what had just happened.

‘Feeling relaxed now?’ Tommy asked with a grin on his face.

‘Yes…uhm…thank you’ you said shyly.

‘It’s my pleasure’ Tommy said with a smile before giving you gentle kiss. You could have spent all night just kissing him. He was good at it and his lips were full and soft.

‘You should get some sleep now, eh’ he said after your lips drifted apart and he caressed your face.

‘Is there anything I could do to return the favour?’ you asked shyly, feeling somewhat guilty about the way he made you feel with nothing in return.

‘No, not tonight Love’ Tommy said as he pulled you closer. Whilst he had the desire to be with you that night, he was still not well enough after his injury and felt as though he should give you time. You were inexperienced and this was new territory for you, possibly overwhelming. Just like this, you had awoken the soft and gentle side of Thomas Shelby and that, in itself, brought him out of his own comfort zone.

He did not know what to do or how to act. The only woman who had managed to do this to him after he’s fought in France was his late wife Grace and he was certain that he would never meet another woman like this again. A woman he would care for in the same way he cared for Grace. Having met you changed everything for him that night and he struggled with the idea to accept his fade, especially with a woman half his age and who was the daughter of the man who tried very hard to bring him down.

Thus, as you leaned your head against his chest carefully, making sure that you didn’t lean against his wound, he couldn’t help but stare at you and ponder about what had brought him to you. Perhaps it was meant to be.

‘What’s wrong Tommy?’ you asked as you began to notice his eyes being fixated on you as he ran one of his hands through your hair gently.

‘Nothing, just enjoying the moment’ he said.

‘Me too Tommy’ you responded before closing your eyes and drifting off to sleep.

Change of Heart

The next morning, when you woke up, Tommy was not by your side. His side of the bed was empty.

But, when you walked downstairs you could see him, sitting in the dining room area with a pen and paper.

You weren’t sure what he was writing and you weren’t sure how to approach him after last night.

You decided to go with a kiss and, just after you said good morning and leaned in to kiss him, Tommy pulled away.

That was unexpected and you looked at him, full of questions.

‘Last night was a mistake Y/N for which I apologise. I should not have been temped’ Tommy said.

‘A mistake? Right’ you said as you walked over to the kitchen bench to boil the kettle. Small tears were running down your eyes and you tried hard to hide them from Tommy.

You had begun to care for him and you most clearly were developing feelings for him.

‘Y/N?’ Tommy said as he noticed you being upset.

‘Tommy, please just give me some space alright’ you said as you walked into the studio with your cup of tea.

You were embarrassed and you felt weak. Yet you wanted to be strong.

Were you too naïve, failing for a man like him?

[jesawyer]

No Power Left to the Vanquished

My feelings, Conscript Fathers, are extremely different, when I contemplate our circumstances and dangers, and when I revolve in my mind the sentiments of some who have spoken before me. Those speakers, as it seems to me, have considered only how to punish the traitors who have raised war against their country, their parents, their altars, and their homes; but the state of affairs warns us rather to secure ourselves against them, than to take counsel as to what sentence we should pass upon them. Other crimes you may punish after they have been committed; but as to this, unless you prevent its commission, you will, when it has once taken effect, in vain appeal to justice. When the city is taken, no power is left to the vanquished.

- Sallust, quoting Cato the Younger, Bellum Catilinae

In the late years of the Roman Republic, a conspiracy arose from within the ranks of the Senate.  The aristocrat Lucius Sergius Catilina attempted to seize control of the government after his bid for consulship failed.  One of the consuls, Cicero, exposed the conspiracy and Catilina fled Rome to prepare an army.  Five of the conspirators were captured after the letters they wrote, in which they urged people to join the conspiracy, were intercepted.  The letters were read before the Senate and Cicero urged for the execution of their authors.

Julius Caesar pled for patience and clemency; after all, Rome had laws and customs to observe. He did not want to set a precedent that the ways of Rome could be set aside because they were inconvenient.  Cato the Younger, a longtime (and future) opponent of Caesar, spoke next.  His appeal won out because the Senate understood the reality of the scenario he was describing: when an institution is in imminent danger from those who seek to dismantle it, you must question if strict adherence to the institution’s laws and customs is worth more than the existence of the institution itself.

Fourteen years later, Julius Caesar, champion of Roman laws and customs, crossed the Rubicon in defiance of law, custom, and the explicit order of the Senate to mark what would become the end of the Roman Republic and the beginning of Caesar’s rule of the Roman Empire.  Caesar’s respect for Roman norms and civitas ended when they put him in personal danger.  As for Cato, he died with the republic and subsequently became its most lionized martyr.

In 1923, Adolf Hitler and Erich Ludendorff, accompanied by hundreds of other Nazis and members of the paramilitary Sturmabteilung staged the Beer Hall Putsch, an attempted coupe d'état against the regional Bavarian government.  Hitler’s goal was to pressure the elected representatives in Munich to turn against the federal government in Berlin through a public show of force and violence.  It failed.  Hitler was imprisoned, but he used his trial testimony to continue spreading his propaganda and dictated Mein Kampf while serving his sentence.  The Beer Hall Putsch was a success for the Nazi party in spite failing to achieve Hitler’s goals.

Ten years later, Hitler was the presidentially-appointed Reichskanzler of Germany. While the Nazis had the most seats in the Reichstag, it was still a minority party.  To ensure the passage of the Enabling Act, which gave the chancellor the power to enact laws without the involvement of the Reichstag, Hermann Göring, President of the Reichstag, suspended the rules for quorum and outlawed the opposition KPD (Communist party) from participating. Sturmabteilung forces entered the assembly chamber to surround and intimidate the non-Nazi representatives into voting for the law.  The passage of the Enabling Act marked the end of the Weimar Republic and the beginning of Hitler’s dictatorship over the German Reich.

The differences between the Beer Hall Putsch and and the Enabling Act were differences of organizational power, instruments, and outcome, not intent.  In both cases, the same bad actors were seeking to overthrow an existing government.  President Paul von Hindenburg and Franz von Papen failed to recognize that Hitler and the Nazis not only threatened the principles of the aristocracy or their other political opponents, but the Weimar Republic itself.

Was the Weimar Republic worth saving?  It was, by most accounts, including the little my grandmother remembered of it, an awful state.  Its government was, putting it mildly, dysfunctional.  Many of its citizens lived through an era of terrible poverty and violence following the end of the first World War.  But the Reich is what came after.  All other avenues of evolutionary institutional or truly revolutionary change ended with the fall of the republic.  The world suffered for it.

Trump and his allies have been attacking American institutions for the last four years.  Trump doesn’t have the ideological drive of Hitler or the strategic acumen of Caesar.  He just has the most base populist instincts to agitate a mob.  What he shares with Hitler, Caesar, and other would-be dictators is a desire to remove opposition and the institutional mechanisms of opposition through whatever means are at his disposal.  If he can do it through an executive order, he will.  If he can do it through political pressure, he will.  If can do it through intimidation, quid pro quo exchanges, and other illegal actions, he will.  And if it requires a mob of supporters to storm the capitol during a Senate session to overturn their certification vote, he’ll try use that, too.

People have been likening what happened in the U.S. capitol to the Beer Hall Putsch.  It’s a fair and reasonable comparison, though Hitler did actually march in his own coup attempt and was wounded during its defeat; Trump just gathered people together, lit a fuse, and watched them go.  But it’s important to remember that the differences between the Beer Hall Putsch and the Enabling Act were of organizational power, instruments, and outcome.  What if there had been more pro-Trump agitators at the capitol?  What if the Senate had not been evacuated in time?  What if Trump had more supporters within the Senate to begin with?  What if Trump were even mildly more intellectually competent or the various online factional leaders in his mob were more coordinated in their tactics and goals?

Facebook, twitter, and other social media sites have deplatformed Trump.  Several companies have suspended hosting services for online communities that have been involved in coordinating fascist, white supremacist mobs in the past. Trump’s supporters, in ignorance or bad faith, have decried that this violates 1st Amendment rights.  They are wrong, but even if they were not, the events of January 6th, planned armed protests on the 17th, and threats of violence against Biden’s inauguration on the 20th, represent the kind of imminent institutional danger that Cato spoke of during the Catiline Conspiracy.  “When the city is taken, no power is left to the vanquished.”

We have wrestled with how the government and corporations should moderate social media since these platforms emerged.  We will continue to do so in the future.  While we must take guard against the transformation of severe actions in time of crisis into the de facto way of handling our day-to-day problems, we must also recognize and act to resolve crises as soon as they appear if we have any interest in preserving the institutions they threaten.

I think of myself as a socialist.  My political thought is not as educated, as principled, or as nuanced as many other socialists I know, some of whom think that any efforts to preserve or work within existing American institutions is, at best, naïve; in practice, counterproductive; and, at worst, actively reactionary.  I often look at our institutions through the lens of a designer.  When I do, I see systems that do not work to produce meaningful social change.  I see systems which do not often work to accomplish any goals of its body politic.  In practice, our systems serve the needs and interests of the ruling class and the powers that have the means and knowledge to manipulate the members of that class.  The systems confine the use of violence and its instruments to the state, as the state sees fit, often to the detriment and mortal peril of the most disadvantaged and vulnerable among us.  It is hard for me to sympathize with those who deify the state and its institutions, especially a state like America that treats its citizens so cruelly.  It becomes even harder when adjacent political cousins perennially denounce any hesitance to support milquetoast centrist candidates as tantamount to treason.  Even so, when fascists, white supremacists, advocates of genocide are positioning themselves to imminently dismantle these institutions through intimidation and violence, it is not difficult for me to see the value in their immediate preservation.

But if the state and its institutions do survive the next few weeks, we will still live in a world where social media and the principles of freedom of speech are vulnerable to the predations of those who would use their contentious legal status to spread lies, foment popular dissent, and, if necessary, coordinate another violent coup d'état when the time is ripe.  The next time, perhaps the popular figurehead will not be as ignorant, as incompetent, as craven, as plainly stupid as Donald Trump.  You can already see his would-be successors positioning themselves for 2024 in the waning hours of his presidency.  The next time, the populist agitators may be more focused in their goals, more coherent in their strategy, more careful in their communication.  Those among them who have witnessed the spectacular failure of imbeciles like Jake Angeli, Adam Johnson, and Richard Barnett may be shrewd enough to learn from the disaster as they prepare for the future.

The Weimar Republic became vulnerable to the schemes of the Nazi party because its representatives failed to address the needs of its citizens and because its leaders failed to recognize the magnitude of threat posed by leaders like Adolf Hitler, propagandists like Goebbels, and paramilitary groups like the Sturmabteilung.  Our elected representatives may have finally, at this recent brink of disaster, comprehended the threat that Trump and his supporters pose to the existence of the state.  After they make their way through January 20th, the federal government will have to address the needs of a disaffected, impoverished, violently-policed, often disenfranchised populace.  They will also have to disentangle the mess that the government has created through their laissez-faire attitude toward social and news media regulation.  Their actions in the immediate future will tell if they intend to effect meaningful change or if they are content to use the next four years to pave a road to the ruin of the republic.

[timemachineyeah]

Can I ask how you know so much about cults? Did you study them?

I mean, yeah. Not, like, officially. Recreationally? Personally?

I was raised Mormon. I was the first in my family to leave (excepting an aunt). I spent almost a decade as the black sheep in that sense. Now 3 out of 5 of my siblings are fully out, and my parents.

Whether you consider the mainstream LDS church a cult depends on how extreme and harmful, or how small and niche, you think cults have to be. But I do. Which means I also consider me and my family cult survivors. But it’s fine if you don’t think my suffering counts that much. Either way, I was in a demanding religion and fundamentalist family and I believed with my whole heart right until I didn’t and I left and that shaped me.

Regardless. When I suddenly dropped out of my faith, I was left floundering. And I handled that like I handle everything. By researching the shit out of it. Researching belief, religion, cults, methods of group control. Researching what is knowable and how it is known and how we can think we know things we don’t and how our brains and bodies can be used against us to get us to behave in ways against our own interests and the interests of society. I needed to understand it to be able to keep myself sane around my family, when sometimes interacting with them made me feel like reality didn’t even exist. I hyperfixated on cults. I still consider them a special interest of sorts. Not the fun kind, like a good anime. The bad kind. But the kind you have to understand to heal and live.

I didn’t even research as much as my aunt did. She almost certainly had it harder than me, so I can’t imagine how she must have felt. She’s written a book on it and gives lectures and stuff. She’s considered a minor expert in the field of Mormonism and models of cult behavior at this point.

My other aunt on the same side, meanwhile, got recruited into a Mormon offshoot and sold everything to move to northern Idaho and wait out a supposed apocalypse on a very specific date that didn’t pan out. She and her family are still there though. She also does lectures and writes online, but hers are about how The End Is Nigh and we must prepare for The Millenium. We don’t talk much, so I’ve never had a chance to ask her how she feels about the two or more Last Day On Earths that have, uh, not happened, that she’s been through. My grandparents would happily join her and her family if they could, but they’re too old and poor and don’t have the resources. So my parents look after them even though they keep sending us emails about how any Democratic president is a socialist antichrist. It’s fun. Just kidding, it’s exhausting.

So yeah. A combination of a lot of research and personal experience?

[oliviermiraarmstrongs]

mid-year book freak out tag

thank you @bloody-wonder for giving me an excuse to share my book thoughts!

1. Best Book You’ve Read So Far in 2021?

It’s gotta be The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood; I hear “feminist period novel about mentally ill woman unable to cope in upper-class society” and I am THERE! It’s like [Stefon voice] This book has EVERYTHING: repressed women, a decaying old house, a complex relationship of two sisters, a pulpy sci-fi story-within-a-story-within-a-story, criticism of capitalism and reactionary attitudes and politics, commentary on how conservative society shuns those it perceives to be “other” and a threat to the social order (poor people, socialists, “unconventional” women). It is EXTREMELY my shit.

2. Best Sequel You’ve Read So Far in 2021?

The only one I've read is Siege and Storm, so Siege and Storm! Shadow and Bone was captivating, if a little simplistic, but the sequel really fleshes out the characters, setting, and themes. It’s great to see Alina take a more active role, and I love the exploration of sainthood. 

3. New Release You Haven’t Read Yet, But Want To?

I’m really curious about Michelle Zauner’s memoir Crying in H Mart. Same with Axiom’s End, which I haven’t really been seeking out, but it’s been resting on my list since I like a lot of Lindsay Ellis’ stuff.

4. Most Anticipated Release For Second Half of 2021?

5. Biggest Disappointment?

The Penelopiad by Margaret Atwood. I’ve been getting into Atwood, and I have a soft spot for female-centric retellings of myths, so this was on my list for a long time. It’s not bad; it’s decent as a character study and offers some good perspective on the hanged slave women from The Odyssey, but overall it came off as...bitter? And not in a good way. It’s reasonable to include commentary on how bad things were for women in ancient times, but after a while I’m just like “But there had to be a time when Penelope was happy, right?” But the biggest failing has to be the treatment of Helen. Why a story focused on bringing literary justice to silenced women also characterizes Helen of Troy as a manipulative, arrogant bitch who single-handedly ignited the Trojan War because she enjoys fucking people over, I’ll never know. Ironic that in the opening chapter, Penelope bemoans being used as a yardstick with which to judge other women, and then the book proceeds to do exactly that with her and Helen. Can’t let Penelope have a positive relationship with another woman! There could be some form of unreliable narrator at play, but there’s not much indication that that’s the case here. Even Homer had a more nuanced portrayal of Helen than this!

6. Biggest Surprise?

I suppose The Red Tent. I picked it up at a Goodwill because of my aforementioned interest in female-centric retellings. It’s not amazing, but I wasn’t really expecting it to emotionally affect me like it did. You spend so much time setting up Dinah’s family and this supportive community of woman within a patriarchal society, only to have Dinah abandon it all after getting betrayed by her father and (most of) her brothers. Hearing about how her family fell apart after she left and she never got to see her mothers again really gets to me. The book has flaws for sure - neither of Dinah’s romances are developed very well, and some of its themes can come off as gender essentialist - but I think it’s a nice exploration of female labor and traditions that too often get ignored.

7. Favorite New Author?

The only relatively new author I’ve been reading is Leigh Bardugo, soooooo... honestly I don’t know what I can say that hasn’t already been said, I got into the series pretty late. Great world-building, witty dialogue, a familiar type of story with enough interesting ideas to make it feel fresh. Check out Shadow and Bone if you get the chance. Sound of the summer.

8. Newest Fictional Crush?

You would think it would be Nikolai Lantsov since I just finished reading Siege and Storm and he seems to be the fan favorite... but nah, not yet. He’s fun, but he doesn’t hit me in that way (Though very sexy of him to just casually proposition Alina and Mal for a royal polycule, a la Arthur/Guinevere/Lancelot; would love an AU where they accept his offer). However, I would let Zoya murder me. Every time Zoya is not in a scene I am asking “Where’s Zoya?” Also shout out to Alina, just because I would treat her better than all the men in her life! 

9. Newest Favorite Character?

Gonna try to do this without spoiling too much, but Laura Chase in The Blind Assassin really resonated with me. Her personality reminds me a lot of myself, especially as an an autistic person, like the way she has her own way of thinking that makes perfect sense to her, but makes other people see her as odd and naive. I love how she’s set up in-universe as this Sylvia Plath-esque tragic heroine, with Iris spending the rest of the book interrogating and deconstructing, and in a way, reconstructing this image of her. Atwood you’re insane for this. I forgive you for the Helen thing now.

10. Book That Made You Cry?

I never got as far as crying, but the part in The Goldfinch where [spoilers incoming] the art heist goes wrong and Theo is alone in the hotel room and he’s spiraling and considering suicide and finally dreams of his mom… all that was too much for me and I had to put the book down for the night. This guy just can’t catch a fucking break.

11. Book That Made You Happy?

fucidjdjdj I didn’t read any happy books this year. Shadow and Bone and Siege and Storm because I read them really fast unlike my usual months-long reading schedule.

12. Favorite Book Adaptation You Saw?

Predictably, Shadow and Bone. I basically bought and read the book less than a week before the show came out because I thought it looked interesting and wanted in on the hype (mostly because Jessie is cute 🥰). Honestly, the show improves a lot on the first book; the multiple storylines make it more dynamic and complex, the actors really help to make the characters feel more fleshed out, and Alina and Inej interacted for like three scenes, introducing an unexpected but thematically rich ship.

13. Favorite Review You’ve Written This Year?

14. Most Beautiful Book You’ve Bought So Far This Year?

I impulse-bought this book of Romantic poetry at Barnes and Noble just because it was pretty and I had a gift card

15. What Books Do You Need To Read By The End Of The Year?

Besides finishing The Grisha Trilogy/Six of Crows duology/Zoya’s duology that I forgot the name of….I don’t know. I’m not a reader that plans in advance. I acquire books, finish whatever I’m currently reading, look through my stacks deciding what to read next, spend an hour doing so because I can’t decide if I’m in the mood for any of them, and either force myself to read one or buy/borrow a new one.

I’m tagging @betweenironyandsilver, @illuminaticns, @borispavlikovskys, @chdarling, @sctine, @mightyaubs, @excuseforadrink, and @trckstergods, if you wanna! Or anyone who wants to yell about books.

[rametarin]

The problem with Eat Da Buuuuuuugs.

It’s not that insects aren’t a high protein, nutritious meal. Because, objectively, they are that. The problem also isn’t “high class vs. low.”

The problem with Eat Da Booooooooogs is that it’s based on moralism and oughts. You OUGHT to brush your teeth, so we invented a state-mandatory toothbrush; it now records the number of times you’ve brushed your teeth and rates how you did it and informed your insurance provider. You OUGHT to have, but you didn’t, so now the state will punish you with higher personal fees and lower how much it will help subsidize the cost, and state subsidies make medical and dental care affordable, so the end result is you pay a literal fortune for not doing what the state thinks you OUGHT.

There are people alive, right now, that for religious reasons, pseudo-spiritualist reasons, moralist dogmatist reasons, absolutely abhor the consumption of red mead and the use of plains and grazing lands, for grazing and feeding animals for food.

Some abhor it because they believe that private property should not exist, and they do not feel people should be able to own livestock; that ‘society’ should own all livestock and be forced to share it. Whether you’re a productive member, or you just sit on your bed playing The Sims and doing ketamine all day. Guess which of the two likes this idea more.

Some abhor it because they’re exisetnailly terrified of life and its consequences. They crave some sort of logic and reason to their existence and a life after death, and aren’t satisfied with the Christian version, so they drift back and forth between their own schizophrenia and the world’s pseudo-spiritualism/New Age Enlightenment, “I take a little bit from all the popular religions and choose what my personal bia- I mean, sixth sense, validates as reasonable to me.” So they dislike the idea of eating red meat, because they don’t want to die and come back as an animal for slaughter. They’re terrified that in a past life or in a future life, they’ll be the meat and suffer for someone elses enjoyment.

Some are spoiled, out-of-touch moralists that believe it’s based on “suffering.” They morally believe penning, owning, feeding and then consuming animals for their flesh is ethically wrong, and so have decided that shouldn’t be a thing other people are allowed to do.

Some are simply shills for Russian or Chinese or Brazilian cattle grazers and want other western countries to adopt anti-meat eating policies under the beliefs that lack of access to red blooded animal protein will reduce the size and strength of their enemies, as well as give them the market on beef, pork and chicken exports to other countries- both legitimate and contraband meat.

Some are simply uppity futurists that believe for humanity to experience a, “global, social evolution,” we have to give up the personal private means of owning and producing anything and turn it over to a central authority that manages that and distributes resources accordingly. They don’t like meat eating, because it’s messy and requires a lot of trained, knowledgeable people to make the food. If everybody just ate plants, they wager, they could grow more in bulk and not only secure where the food comes from through controlling arable land for growing food, but control everybody dependent on the food.

Some are trendy know-nothing, “environmentalists,” that will hop on whatever poorly informed bandwagon that touts itself as progressive. Just, the sort of soy sop that will scream about loving science one minute and then ignore where the cloth medical mask says, on the fucking box, “it won’t prevent viruses like COVID-19.” But still wear it and goose step around demanding you wear it to show your patriot- I mean, to show you believe in THE SETTLED SCIOOONCE. These ones believes that cow farts and burps are extremely detrimental to the atmosphere in the form of methane produced, as well as their production of CO2 from breathing and to a lesser extent, living, dying and excreting.

The problem with that is that cows, chickens and pigs are also part of the carbon cycle, and as far as CO2 production, agricultural meat is kind of.. benign. Meat eating does not affect the CO2 cycle directly. You can argue that transportation of it might affect some, but if you switch out gasoline and diesel for electric vehicles, suddenly red meat drops to virtually nothing in the CO2 department.

And then if you count the methane emissions, well, we have workarounds to virtually eliminate cow, chicken, pig, goat and all major red meat food gasses.

So CO2 outputs and methane outputs can drop to virtually nothing, we can clean up our agricultural sector into non-problematic in any way. To where any argument that growing animals for food has any effect on climate change, at all, just becomes an bogus lie from someone hellbent on using the institutions of our society to make cattle, sheep and pig farming, legally impossible.

And ultimately, why?

Because you can grow more bugs in a smaller space on shittier diets? We already have meat alternatives.

The biggest argument for bugs as food is you might be able to grow more of them in space for cheaper and take them further. That’s it. A million bug buttholes still produce noxious clouds of nitrous oxide, carbon dioxide and methane. Leafcutter ants down in South America make bacteria filled piles that rival human wastewater treatment plants, for example. They still emit the same noxious gasses that animals do.

And when it comes to methane production, cows don’t hold a candle to the amount of negative atmospheric effects that rice farms do. Are we going to tell Asia, “no more rice,” because the global effects of climate change? It makes no fucking sense to single out cows, sheep, pigs and chickens as even relevant sources of these gasses, where even IF we can deal with every conceivable complaint or concern, people still just want you to no longer be allowed to grow them and just EAT the BOOOOOOGS.

I’m not opposed to crushed up insects as another alternative protein. I am absolutely, 100% opposed to vegetarians or vegans or fabian socialists trying to get the government to subsidize this source of protein, demand that every taxpayer put forwards money to public schools to provide the bug pattys as their source of nutrition (if only by not just the factually reduced cost but the suddenly subsidized captured market that is school lunch budgets and mandatory purchases), and either charge cattle and beef plants more as a “luxury tax” or punish them for being, “dirty, environment destroying” sources of food.

These people are not content to leave you alone to the things you enjoy, you have to be financially and economically incentivized to give them up, institutionally punished, or effectively give away your opportunity for a brighter future if you persist in consumption and traffic of them. Eat Da Boogs is about whether moralists are allowed to use the institutions and the legal system to enforce subjective, preferential things on other people for bogus reasons, and if you can be compelled to do someone elses, “right thing,” or what they think you OUGHT to do.

So. I’m not against bugs as a supplemental nutrition source. I’m against uppity vegans trying to make the government subsidize it and violently take over every single niche, both economically and through government regulated FIAT to eliminate the one held by beef, sheep, goat, chickens and pigs from our agricultural sector and culture.

Once humans are no longer allowed to grow animals for food, and they’re all effectively killed and disappear, there’s no undoing that. That culture will disappear. And that’s ultimately what they’re counting on.

After that, all they need to truly force vegetarianism on “society,” is eliminate the legal growth of insects as a food source for the same moralist precedent reasons as they deemed red blooded animals to be no good as food or agriculture. With no remaining alternative but to try and domesticate other animals.

The Bugs are about more than crushed up insects on a patty. They’re about using shitty false pretenses to eliminate choice from you and take agency away. It’s not about not wanting to eat bugs, it’s about wanting to eat pork and beef and chicken and the existence of an alternative emboldening them to try and ban those.

[wisteria-lodge]

burnt snake primary + bird secondary [model?]

Hi! I have been aware of the Sorting system for a long time now but I always get stuck in typing myself. I was wondring if you could shed some light on the process.

If we go by what I score at the test, it's usually a tie between Snake and Lion primary (most likely Bird last) and Bird/Badger secondary (most likely Lion last).

Internal primary / Built secondary, I can work with that. 

If we go by the "favorite characters" test then most of them are Snake primary and/or Bird secondary. I also have found that Lion doesn't exactly mess well with me, most character with a Lion anything get on my nerves but that's not a constant.

Fictional lions can be exaggerated in a way that works as a power fantasy for real lions... but I’m mostly just interested to see if the ‘favorite character’ test works out. 

I've also come to realise in real life that i absolutely hate deception or betrayal especially if it comes from someone I trust/close to me. 

I mean... is there anyone who is like ‘yes, I’m totally cool with people I trust betraying me.’ 

I also have an issue with loyalty and honesty both so I can understand why Snake/Lion is tied for my primary. My issue with Snakes is that I don't think I have this "no matter what" support. I bond with people a lot but if they don't treat me right I will push back, I will cry, I will tell them off 

Snakes might have more trouble than Lions when it comes to breaking with people who mistreat them... and they might feel more conflicted and “sticky” afterwards, since being loyal to people is the base of their morality. But they will absolutely do it. 

Think about a Lion changing their mind versus a Bird changing their mind. They both *do* it, but since a Bird has access to all the levels of their system, it’s all very consciously constructed, and they’re used to poking at it - change isn’t usually *that* big of a deal.

But I’m a Lion. If I’m going to change my mind, I need to smacked over my head with the lesson, usually multiple times (although I’m getting better about that...) I’m going to have a mini existential crisis (those things clear out the cobwebs.) And then I’ll be emotionally recalibrated. Snakes are internal primaries just like Lion, so their process is more like that. Dropping people is hard and emotional and sticky, but when they are dropped they are dropped. Badgers, since their *reasons* for whether or not they are responsible for someone are much clearer and more accessible, have an easier time writing people off. 

if I don't get the level of intense I'm looking for I will translate that as "not caring enough" and I'll break up or if that's not possible for whatever reason i'll be miserable.

You certainly want to get Snake loyalty directed at you, and if you don’t get it, you’re miserable. And the fact that something like that would make you miserable... is making me think Snake. This is very Snake-flavored angst.

A huge sourse of pain in my life had been some things that happened with my father that I translated as him probably loving himself more than me. I always see that Snakes stay loyal to their close ones no matter what and I'm like: why would I stay unwavering to someone that hurts me? 

You wouldn’t. You shouldn’t. No one should. 

I didn't abandon my dad when he was sick but I'm pretty sure I was Burned and resnting him 24/7 (sorry for the heavy stuff).

Being a caregiver is INCREDIBLY hard (there’s a reason you can hire people to do it, and they’re payed so well.) Being a caregiver to a family member is even harder, and being a caregiver to a family member who’s hurt you is probably one of the hardest things a human being can do. It’s really, really not unusual at all to resent the sick person, and you should not feel guilty about it. 

You also mention that Snakes understand other Snakes when they put their loved ones first and maybe in real life I do it but I have a huge example of me watching a Snake primary character not cutting off his love interest when she was awful to him from my perspective (emotional manipulation, choosing others before him, rejecting him, generally not loving him) and being LIVID about it.

I guess what I would say to you... is that even though the other primaries show their love differently, it does not mean they love any less intensely. A Badger choosing someone in need instead of you does not mean they are *not* loving you. 

Generally I tend to prefer couples that have things in common and two Snake primaries together will most likely be my favorites, most of my ships are like that.

There is something very attractive about two Snakes in a relationship together, but remember that all these different primaries and secondaries do balance each other out. I tend to think that *exact* house matches make unfortunate romantic pairings. They re-enforce each other’s negative traits, get too extreme, and sometimes get stuck because they’ve only got the one way to approach, and solve a problem. 

I have been very adamant about my friends not giving manipulative people the 'get go' to do whatever they want with them because I can see the indiference and the manipulation. 

Manipulation is a problem solving strategy, indifference is a motive. They’re not the same thing.

I get mad when they don't listen to me eventhough I turn out to be right. Most of the times I have cut off people from my life is the reason I said preiously, that I don't think they give as much support as I do to them and they end up after a point on my "I don't need you in my life anymore" list.

I’m starting to think you’re a Burnt Snake. You are clearly Snake, and you want to distribute Snake loyalty to the people around you. But it doesn’t feel safe (probably because of baggage left over from your dad - he hurt you, so you’re scared that they will too.) So you’re hyper sensitive to anything that doesn’t feel like the most extreme devotion. And just like a Burnt Badger rejecting people preemptively, before they have a chance to fail them... you’re rejecting people because it hurts less than them rejecting you. 

I think Lion gets up high because I can understand the need for following a 'cause' but in my case it's not exactly a moral cause, it's simply that I always wanted to be an actress and generally expand my knowledge on cinema/TV/theatre so I studied it. I wanted to be succesful in my job and get better and better and better. I am interested in prizes but only if they come as a recognition of my skillset (if that makes sense). I always thought that people were my priority even though the goal of achieving my dreams was always guiding me but as I grow older I'm not so sure anymore. I just know I couldn't be walking through life all alone.

This sounds like a Snake with no people (who wants people.) Without people, Snakes take care of themselves, and that often look likes job, money, prizes. (It’s where the old stereotype of “ambitious” comes from.) 

When I was thinking about what I wanted to do for a living, I wanted something that would wake me up in the mornings and make me feel that my time at a job won't be wasted. 

As do we all.

But I also needed for everything to be a real job, not charity for the "cause" eventhough I have worked A LOT just because I love doing some things and not ony to get paid. But I guess these things are fueled by my love and I don't see them as "profession" per se. 

People? Until in we live in the Star Trek socialist utopia, you need to be paid for the work you do. Even if you’re working for a charity and even if you’re doing something you love. 

Another pointer towards Lion is that I do identify with the thinking of systems and how they play a part in people's lives and how they should be changed. But I'm not sure I always did this. I think I've been Burned as well at some point (not sure if I still am) so that makes things difficult.

Yeah, you’re Burned. And sometimes Burnt Snakes will latch onto a Lion Cause, the same way that Burnt Lions will latch onto an individual’s morality. That’s actually pretty common.

The secondary thing is pretty simple imo, I think I'm a Bird but I might be Burned? I don't know if that "useful/fun" situation makes a difference for me because I always think that whatever I have collected is actually useful to me and if I got new skills, they would be useful to me as well at some point.

I don't know what else to write really, I think it's quite a lot to read already. If you have an inclination about my type I'd like to hear your opinion.

You haven’t talked at all about how you solve problems. Which might relate to burning, or it might not. But if you tend to collect skills and tools, that’s at least a Bird secondary model. <3

[technomaestro]

Oh? Tell us about the characters on that list then

*slaps character sheet* this bad boy can fit so much of my own repressed trauma in it

This one could be fuckin *all* of them, but it's probably Kelarvia Arana, aka Kel. Poor dwarven fighter exile from Orzamar who turned to the Qun, was trained wrong as a spy, failed her family, failed the qun, failed her friends, and kept trying to do right. She was... not bright. She took a face full of acid breath for her troubles, got repeatedly stabbed by everyone around her, and still kept fucking trying. She was not in a great place by the end of that campaign.

Closeted Trans Person Gender Envy Character™

So, while I'm very much cis, I did toy around with the idea of genderfluidity and transness at one point. And the closest character to that would have been a major NPC that I had in my pokemon game, Claire deVire. She was a literal illusionist / Fairy Type mage, and honestly one of my favorite NPCs to use in the game. I played her as a confident and experienced trainer who had an air of mystery, was clever and flirtatious, and who had a very accomplished team including trans icon Sylveon. She is/was one of the main *villains* of the campaign, but that's besides the point. If I was a girl, she's who I'd want to be - but I'm pretty solid in my gender at this point.

sexy

That would be Lucas Maignard, the Silver Lion. Not just your average silver fox, but a nobleman who absolutely could rock it. Think Rollo from Vikings except salt and pepper hair. He was power hungry, a staunch revanchist of his family's ancestral title and he would go to every length it took to reclaim it, including trying to seduce the King's consort. He, notably, caused at least one if not more international incidents by insulting the soccer abilities of a neighboring kingdom.

He may have had the highest charisma of any character I've played.

idealized version of myself

Allow me to introduce you to Broderic Gullet, a 6'6 tall constantly drunken scotsman Barbarian with a hammer who was unkillable. Literally - he actually died at one point and came back to life because he was too damn stubborn to leave before his friends had gotten to safety, and some passing spirit possessed him and turned him into an abomination. He was jovial, friendly, could talk to his cat Mr. Pickles, and wonderfully buff enough he could hug all his friends at once. Plus he was a trained chef.

As Fruity And Extra As Possible

Oh this is easy. The Satyr Diplomat Cheldric delWolpertinger, a man who *honestly* should have read the recommended reading before being sent to deliver very important documents (these were actually talking frogs!). He was supposed to board a new train on the mountainous passage to Westport, but forgot his ticket. When the train left, he literally jumped (and I mean I cast "jump" and specifically was a Satyr for their Mirthful Leaps feature which adds 1d8 to my jump distance) onto the back of the train. Unfortunately, the murder of the conductor was a bit of an issue, but Cheldric and some other passengers put their heads together to solve the mystery.

furry

So, allow me to set the stage for Albie, Traitor to Crowkind. A Kenku that was as much benefit to the party as he was walking, curse triggering hazard, this absolute buffoon would do what he could to simultaneously help the party while also doing his best not to piss of Strahd too much. A lighting bolt cast into the middle of melee that hit everyone totally gives him plausible deniability for who survives.

I think my favorite memory though is when one of the other party members just opened his beak and he started reciting the Book of Strahd like Stitch plays that record in Lilo & Stitch

A good runner up here would also be Nilbo, a Kobold Druid who only became a druid because it let him wild shape into progressively bigger lizards and dinosaurs. No other animals, just scales.

I Saw One Of The Extra Fantasy Races That Aren’t In The Player’s Handbook And Almost Had A Stroke

Listen. Listen to me. I fucking love Warforged. I will *always* go to bat for magical robots. They're amazing and I've played so many, from psions to storm domain clerics to the most recent one, Hymn, a gender-neutral Celestial Pact Warlock Warforged who got his abilities because he was a socialist. No, I'm not joking - he was made for usage by the Church of the Sovereign Host, but when a wandering heretical priest came by wondering why the church didn't do more, Hymn started going out at night to perform direct action and mutual aid. Being not that smart, he accidentally wandered into a cult's base and released a captive celestial, who gifted him the power to help more.

a race + class that typically would not go together

I'm of a tossup here - the Halfling Artificer Posco Harfoot, who was a member of the Justicars and in order to even the playing field, built himself a goddamn magitek mech in order to go toe to toe with the other peacekeepers, or of Tiberius Vanderwhinn, an elven Path of the Zealot barbarian who was *extremely* keen on getting his libraries late fees sorted, and gods help you if you dared shout in his library.

sexy criminal

Very few things are sexier than a tiefling, and that would be Boreo Lieran, the Tiefling Bard. Boreo was a staunch contender for the "As fruity as possible" but this pansexual beast is much more in line here because the man seduced half the party prior to or during session 1. Having a prehensile tail and the ability to pick up the gnome lass in the party by it for him to tease probably helped.

Of course, such a man was hilariously illegal, because not only did he smuggle and steal like, 90% of his luxury goods that he used to pamper himself with, he would absolutely flaunt a total disregard for property rights and find himself making grand entrances into peoples homes and lives as part of his wayward caravan, leaving a trail of chaos in his wake.

himbo

One of the more recent characters I've played. Cadmus, Son of Abraxes! A "human" wizard on the plane of Theros, this man is the half-divine son of the literal personification of the pride of a polis that was wiped off the face of the world by the gods for their Hubris. So, an active devotee of the god of victory, and actively blaspheming the goddess of destiny at every turn (As he would put it, we hold the pen in our hands, she merely hoards the ink), his goal was to perform deeds good enough to earn a place as a constellation under the stars. He would only *ever* sleep outside at night, even in cities, because he wanted to rest with them as he knew one day he would for eternity.

[nothingunrealistic]

WAGS: It was a chance meeting with Axe at a golf outing wherein he read my tarot cards for me, told me what was gonna happen. I was able to sell at fifty. If I had waited a few more months, it would have been at two. Axe’s warning allowed me to save my ass before it was too late. I do not want to be in that position ever again.

TAYLOR: I see. Even though your former company was levered thirty-one times and there were countless other factors at play, I get how traumatic that was.

—————

AXE: You tanked the meeting. You pitched an idea you knew they would find repulsive. You don’t want Grigor Andolov’s money on board.

TAYLOR: Yes. You’re right. I think international criminals are unstable bedrock for a cap raise. You don’t think taking his money was at least worth a discussion?

AXE: There was a discussion.

TAYLOR: I see.

—————

CHUCK: That right there is the very picture of criminal conduct.

TAYLOR: And the part where I refuse and walk out?

CHUCK: There’s always a camera malfunction...

TAYLOR: I see. Well, in that case, I’d like to speak to —

—————

TAYLOR: Chancellor. Are we ready to discuss ACATing your accounts over?

KARRAS: We are not. This is Admiral Bill Karras, chairman of the board of trustees. You may have hypnotized the chancellor, here. But I have stood up to much harsher methods of interrogation.

TAYLOR: I see.

—————

TAYLOR: You’ve got to stop. And ditch. My brilliant new analyst thinks she’s suddenly bilingual, but she just made an elaborate lunch order on the phone with Chile.

AXE: Of course. What else would you say? If it’s not quant or impact, you don’t buy in. And that’s if your motives even check out in the first fucking place —

TAYLOR: I see. I know you haven’t been completely sure about me, but ask yourself if you can trust me now, because I’m telling you: It’s likely the Socialists win in Chile.

—————

TAYLOR: I haven’t seen you leave your office.

LAUREN: Is that your way of asking if I’ve had dinner? You’re usually more direct.

TAYLOR: To go see Axe. To tell him that you’re choosing Mase Carb.

LAUREN: I’m considering his offer to work for Axe Bank.

TAYLOR: I see. When you factor in your bonus, you’d make less there than you do here. What tempts you about his offer that I won’t be able to match?

———

TAYLOR: How can I suddenly trust him?

WENDY: Because he wouldn’t do anything to hurt me. And I know I’m the only person in the world that’s true of.

TAYLOR: He’s hurt you before when he’s needed to.

WENDY: He did. But I understand why. And things are different between us now.

TAYLOR: I see. In that case, I’ll affirm it.

3x03 a generation too late // 3x09 icebreaker // 4x12 extreme sandbox // 5x03 beg, bribe, bully // 5x07 the limitless shit // 5x10 liberty