#i think this is the most shocking thing i've discovered in doing this ask thing. i figured he would love paul

[muffinpink02]

Cravings

Okay, this is my first little family/baby story. Its my first attempt at fluff and cute stuff, I hope it makes sense. Let me know what you think. I've already started another one so hopefully you like this.

Summary - You’re pregnant, married to Alexia. Your cravings get you a little emotional. Just little bits and pieces of your pregnancy and Alexia helping you every step.

Warnings - swearing

You stood on your tiptoes as you rummaged in your snack box, trying to look for your latest obsession.

“Babe! Where are those salted caramel chocolates we got? The gold packet ones?” You shouted for your wife as you scanned the cupboards. 

Being pregnant wasn't as bad as you thought it would be. Yeah, your body had completely changed, and your mind had gotten foggy, and your emotions were hard to keep up with and you struggled to do simple things like put your shoes on. But, having Alexia as your wife made the whole experience worth it, the girl was a saint. 

When you were around 6 weeks pregnant you had suffered with some morning sickness, though thankfully it didn't last too long. When you were rushing to the bathroom at 4am, flopping to your knees, trying to get your vomit in the bowl on time, Alexia wouldn't be far behind you. She would always be by your side, rubbing your back as soon as she heard you jump out of the bed. 

“It's okay, amor. Here’s some water, clear your mouth.” 

You rinsed your mouth, washing the taste of acid from your tongue. She helped you back to bed, stroking your cheek until you fell asleep against her chest. She would always feel so bad for you, she hated watching you in any kind of pain.

Then came the cravings. At first it was anything sweet and juicy. You became obsessed with fruit, the berry family in particular. Blackberries, blueberries, raspberries if it had a ‘berry’ at the end of it you had to have it. And your most favourite berry was strawberries. You found yourself going through a pack of the sweet fruits every 2 days. 

Anything with the flavour of strawberry you had to have. Strawberry ice cream, strawberry jam, strawberry drinks, strawberry sweets, you even changed your lips gloss to strawberry. If it had a trace of strawberry then you had it in your mouth. Alexia joked that the baby was going to come out with red skin and green leaf’s for hair.

The fixation then progressed to strawberry milkshakes. You discovered the obsession when you and Alexia were out in town, you had both stopped to look at a display in the shop window. But your attention was caught by a whole other shop. Alexia hadn't even realised you had gone until she noticed she didn't get a response to her question.

“What do you think? ….Bebé?” 

The blonde looked to her side where you had just been standing, she only had to look a few shops down, when she caught you watching the milkshakes being made in the other window. She smiled as she walked over to you, eyeing your ever growing belly as it poked out under your t-shirt. 

“Want a milkshake, amor?” Alexia wrapped her arms around you, her warm body pressing into your own.

“Yeah, a strawberry one.” You smiled as you felt her kiss your cheek.

So, Alexia brought you a milkshake, asking for extra strawberries without you even having to ask.

The milkshake obsession then became something you wanted, no, needed everyday. 

So, in the mornings before training Alexia would make your strawberry milkshake alongside her protein shake. You didn't know how, but the girl would always make the fruity drink so much better than you ever could, no matter how hard you tried, hers always tasted sweeter.

As soon as you found out you were pregnant you stopped playing for Barca and went on maternity leave. And of course Alexia became super protective over you, though it wasn't a shock to you when she did, she was protective with you before you even became pregnant. 

Slowly you had to reduce your personal training as you got further along. Alexia watched you like a hawk when you wanted to do any kind of weight training, making sure you never did anything over 5kg. She would take regular walks with you and even joined your swimming classes, as they were deemed ‘safe’ enough for her. 

She insisted on carrying all the bags when you went grocery shopping, not letting you carry anything that could potentially ‘hurt’ you or the baby. Though you secretly loved the extra attention. Until Alexia wanted to build the baby cot alone, because she was scared you would hurt yourself with the hammer, and you had to put your foot down. 

Alexia was also amazing with her hands, and not just for other things. If you ever complained about a painful back or sore feet she would be on you in seconds, massaging your muscles until you couldn’t even remember the ache you had. She would run you baths, make your favourite dinners and always make sure you and the baby were getting your vitamins. 

She was simply the best, you saw a whole new side to her, you didn't think it was possible but it made you fall in love with her more everyday.

Anything you wanted to buy for the baby the Spaniard would look into the product, and study the reviews for hours, making sure it was good enough for the baby. If there was even one bad review from 3 years ago she would ask you to look for another one. “Just in case, amor.”

She of course brought every book you could read on pregnancy and child care, reading them at night before bed. Telling you all the tips and tricks it had for expecting mothers. You listened while you stared at your wife, her serious tone was on but you could only watch her beautiful features as she spoke, making you wonder what parts the baby would get from her. 

You hoped they got everything from her.

One afternoon you came back from a shopping outing with Ingrid. You both walked through your hallway, but was stopped in your tracks when you saw a new gate between the rooms, it was a baby gate. You looked at Ingrid who was already smiling, she knew what Alexia was like. 

“Ale, baby? What's this?” You called out.

The blonde skipped down the hall, a proud smile on her face. 

“It's for the baby, so it doesn't get into trouble.” She tapped the gate proudly, looking at the object like it was a brand new Bentley. 

“But the baby won't be walking for a long time. I don’t know if we need this yet.” You chuckled as she eyed the bars.

“No, no. It's better to be ready. We can get used to it before the baby comes.”

“She has a point.” Ingrid chimed in.

“Sí. Ingrid gets it.” The blonde nodded at the raven haired girl. 

“If it makes you happy, then I’m happy. Now, open it up so we can get through.” 

Alexia moved to open the gate, but it wouldn't open for her.

“Wait, I think it's this way.” The blonde frowned as she tried to pull the handle. But still, she couldn't open it. “Cosa estúpida.” 

“Let me try.” You dropped your bags and attempted to open the gates yourself, but you couldn't do it either. 

“Why won't it open?” You sighed in annoyance.

“No, pull it. Pull that bit up. Towards you.” Alexia tried to direct you.

“I am doing that!” 

And just before you were about to have a domestic, Ingrid silently leaned forward and with no fuss opened the gate like it was the most simplest thing to do. You both gapped at the Norwegian, wondering what kind of trick she used to open it.

“Do it again.” Alexia stared at the gate, wondering how on earth Ingrid was able to open it.

Luckily by the 50th try you both had learnt to finally open it. 

Alexia hated leaving you in the morning when she went to training. She would wake up 20 minutes early just to have extra cuddles with you, or talk to your belly. Your heart would melt when she spoke to the ever growing bump. She had felt silly when she first started doing it, talking to a belly with a small human inside felt weird, but she slowly got used to it.

It actually became something she looked forward to, you would read or scroll on your phone as the blonde shared the events of her day with the bump, she even did it when you were fast asleep, having her own private conversation with the little human. And of course she spoke it in her mother tongue, there was no chance that baby wasn’t going to learn Catalan. 

One afternoon when you were five months pregnant she was talking to the bump, her face resting gently against the side of your stomach, stroking your skin. She promised the ‘Berry’ (as she liked to call it), that she was going to take them to all the Barcelona games and how she was going to train the baby to be a midfielder or striker, and definitely not a defender. 

You chuckled at her words. Earlier that day you had visited Alexia at training. All the girls excitedly greeted you, everyone wanted to feel your stomach, and you gladly let them, you had missed them all so much. 

“Sí, that's a defender in there, I can tell.” Mapi said confidently, smiling at you. 

“No, it's going to be a goalie.” Cata insisted.

You laughed as you watched Alexia’s face drop, the group then all started arguing about what position the baby would play, Alexia had sulked on the way home, but you only laughed at her pout. You were suddenly pulled from your memories. 

You both felt it. Alexia jumped away from you in an instant.

“Oh, Déu meu. Did you feel that?” She looked at you with wide eyes.

“Yes! It kicked!” You gasped as you touched the spot.

“Like a footballer! Berry has a strong kick!” She touched your belly in awe, staring at the bump. Then came another kick. The blonde gasped as you both felt the little life  wiggling inside you.

“That's definitely a striker in there.” She smiled playfully.

You rolled your eyes at the big child in front of you. 

“I love you, amor.” Her large hands cradled your bump, she looked at you with so much love it almost overwhelmed you. 

“I love you too, baby.” You whispered. 

You watched as she kissed your bump, you stroked her hair out of her face as her smile grew. You felt your own eyes water at the beautiful women in front of you. You couldn't believe that this was your life, you felt so lucky that she was the mother of your child.

By 6 months your cravings changed to everything salty. Peanuts, chips, crisps, pretzels, salty popcorn, you name it you had it. You added salt to nearly every one of your meals. Alexia had to conversacate the condiment out of fear of your obsession. 

Now you are 8 and a half months pregnant. You only had 2 weeks to go before the baby was set to arrive. So, now it was just a waiting game.  A long, uncomfortable waiting game.

“What ones?” Alexia walked into the kitchen. 

You looked through your snack cupboard, trying to find the chocolate you had become obsessed with. Your two cravings of sweet and salty had combined and got you into your new favourite obsession of salted caramel chocolate. 

“The ones we got the other day, I’m sure I bought 3 packets.” 

“You finished them, don't you remember? I even warned you that you didn't have any left after that.” She chuckled as she stroked your neck.

You felt your eyes prickle with heat, your tears making your eyes glassy. Of course you knew this wasn't a normal way to react just because you didn't have the chocolates you craved, but you were hormonal, and tired and everything hurt and your back was killing you and your feet were sore and the TV in the background was too loud.

“Oh.” Your voice cracked.

Alexia's eyes widened in panic. “What's wrong, bebita? Are you okay?”

You sniffed, you tried to hide your face as you felt the tears prick your eyes. God, you felt stupid. Crying over a chocolate bar. You felt Alexia’s hand travel to your back, stroking you with the softest touch. 

“Y-yeah, yeah. Sorry, I just really wanted th-” You couldn't finish your sentence as the hormonal dam broke. 

Alexia really panicked then. “Bebé. Shhh it's okay, don't cry. I can get you more.” She pulled you into her chest. “I’ll go get you a crate of them, please don't cry.”

You sobbed into her chest, you couldn't believe you were crying over this, you knew it was just your hormones, but you couldn't control it.

“I’m sorry Ale, I’m just… it's just everything hurts. I can’t get comfortable in any position. I’m hot then I'm cold. My bodies changed so much. I can’t even see my feet anymore! My boobs are killing me. I hate the smell of my favourite perfume and now I’m crying over fucking chocolate.” 

“Hey, shh it's okay. You don’t have to explain yourself. I’m sorry, bebé. Let me get your chocolate, and whatever else you want, we can get a take out tonight or I can cook your favourite meal. Does that sound good?” The blonde kissed your forehead. 

You nodded in her chest, you felt like a sulky child. At least you knew Alexia would be prepared when your child would have their tantrums, or she would just give in and give them chocolate.

“Good. Come sit down. I’ll run you a bath.” 

The blonde ran you a bath with your favourite bath soaks. The bubbles were nearly flowing out over the sides once she was happy with it. She helped you into the warm tub, stroking your hair back as you settled.

“Okay. I won't be long. Be careful when you get out okay.” 

You rolled your eyes and smiled. “I will Ale, thank you for this.” 

“Got to look after my babies.” She kissed your head and winked at you.

She closed the door and made her way to the shops for your chocolate.

You sunk into the hot bath, breathing in the sweet coconut bath milk that Alexia used. You already felt better, Alexia always knew what to do to make you feel at ease. She was always calm around you even when she wanted to panic. 

You laid for another 20 minutes soaking your muscles. You carefully made your way out of the bath, wrapping your fluffy towel around you. 

You began to get your joggers on when you felt a shooting pain, you grabbed your belly on the sharp twinge. Then another one came, but it was a lot less painful then the first. You took in a deep breath as you put on your t-shirt. 

Your doctor told you that you might potentially get pains closer to the due date. So you tried not to overthink it. You looked at your phone, Alexia should have been home by now. That's when you saw her texts.

Alexia - They don’t have the chocolates in the store, going to another one xx 

Alexia - They don’t have it in that one either, I’ll go to Summers.

Summers was over a half hour's drive, you didn't want Alexia to drive so far for a chocolate bar. You called her phone, she answered by the first ring.

“Hola baby, you okay?”

“Ale, you don't have to drive to Summers, it's too far.”

“I’m 5 minutes away now, it’s fine, amor. I know you want this. I know you would do it for me.”

You smiled. “Yeah, okay, well thank you, you’re the best.”

“I know.” You could hear the smile in her tone.

You rolled your eyes playfully. “Let's hope the baby gets your humble characteristics.”

The blonde laughed down the phone. “I hope Berry is every piece of you.”

You felt your heart melt at her words. The girl really knew how to make you melt.

“I’ll see you in a bit.” 

“Sí, i'll see you soon.” 

You hung up the phone and made your way to the sofa, trying to find something you could watch without ruining anything you and Alexia watched together. But as you clicked through the options you jumped with a flash of pain.

“Fuck!” 

The pain came again, quicker and longer. You panted as you felt the twinge trickle into your back, causing you to drop you to your knees, you gritted your teeth as the throbbing ache swept down to the bottom of your stomach.

“Owwwww! Shit!” You cried out.

You still had 2 weeks till your due date, surely this wasn't labour? It was just the pain the doctor told you about. Braxton hicks, that's what it was. You grabbed your phone, you tried to call Alexia but she didn't answer, because she was out getting your stupid chocolates! 

Then you called Ingrid. Your best friend. Her and Mapi only lived a 2 minute walk from you. Maybe they could drive you to the hospital. The line rang, Ingrid picked up after the third ring.

“Hello, sweet pea.” She sang down the phone.

“Hey, do you think- fuck!” 

Another sharp pain stabbed through your body.

“Are you okay?” Ingrid asked, panic in her voice. 

“Yeah, well, no. I’m in pain, I don’t really know what to do. Alexias half way across town and-”

“I’m coming over.” 

“Thank you, Ingrid. Sorry I don’t want to be a nuisance- oh my g-” You groaned as another sharp pain hit you.

“Mapi, get your shoes on. Stay on the phone, we’re coming now.”

“Okay.” You breathed out.

You put the phone on speaker as you cradled your belly. You could hear Mapi’s confused voice in the background. You pushed the whispers of hair out of your face as you felt your body start to heat up from the pain. Why did this have to happen now? 

The girls must have sprinted to yours as they were at your door just over a minute later. Ingrid let herself in with her spare key. You heard their feet as they rushed through your hallway.

“I’m in here gu- uys! Owww!” You groaned.

You felt Ingrid kneel beside you. Her hand instantly rubbing your back.

“How long have you had the pain?”

“Maybe 10 minutes.” You sighed.

“Do you think you're in labour?”

“No, the doctor said this would happen. I’m not due for another-”

Your sentence was cut short as you felt a stream of water coming from between your legs. You waters broke.

“No, no, no, no, please! Fuck. Not now!” 

“Ay dios mío!” Map shouted from the door. “We need to get her to a hospital!”

“Mapi, calm down.” Ingrid's tone was low.

The raven haired girl turned back to you, her face was calm but firm.

“Can you walk?” 

“Y-yeah, I think so.” 

“Okay, I’ll help you. Come.” 

Your best friend slid her arm under your own, helping you to your feet. 

“Okay good. Breath. Mapi, call Alexia.” 

Mapi stared at you with wide eyes, she looked more scared than you, to be honest she probably was. She hadn't even heard Ingrid’s instructions, her whole body stood still, frozen with fear. 

“Maria! Come on. Call Alexia.” Ingrid repeated.

Her brown eyes finally snapped to Ingrid. “Sorry, yeah. Call Alexia, I can do that.” 

The girl mumbled, panic setting over her shaky voice. You watched as she aimlessly patted her body, looking everywhere as if she had no clue what she was looking for. She finally found the device in her back pocket, she took a deep breath, looking for her best friend's name in her phone..

Ingrid looked at you. “Okay let's go.” 

You nodded your head, but as you took a step to walk the worst of the pain finally came crashing down. Your knees gave in once more as your muscles spasmed from the ache. 

“Fuck, Ingrid I can’t!” You groaned as you knelt to the floor.

Alexia smiled to herself as she slotted the big box of caramelised chocolates in the boot of the car. She was able to sweet talk the shop owner into selling her the large supply with a photo and signature. She felt so proud of herself, she couldn't wait to show you her little accomplishment. She got in the car ready to drive back home to you, that's when she looked at her phone to see Mapi calling. 

She pressed the green button as she lifted it to her ear.

“Hola-” The blonde flinched as the sound of your screams penetrated down the phone.

“Mapi? Wh-whats going on?”

“Ale, y/n’s in labour, you need to get back.”

“What? She’s not due yet.” Alexia felt herself panicking hearing your painful moans in the background.

“Her waters broke. She’s ready. We’re going to take her to the hospi-”

A deafening scream came from the depths of your stomach. There was no way you were about to move, not with the pain you were in. This baby was ready to come out. 

Mapi looked shell shocked as she held the phone to her face, her mouth gaping at you. “I don’t know if we’re going to make it to the hospital.” The defender whispered. 

Ingrid held your head, helping you move to whatever position you needed, she grabbed the big pillows of the sofa and tucked them behind your back, her calming presence was everything you needed right now but the one you wanted most wasn't here.

“Where is she? I nee-  ahhh! Oh my god it hurts so bad! MAPI! Tell Alexia to get home now!” You started to sob.

Alexia started her engine and her phone speaker on loud. “Mapi, tell her I'm on my way, I’m coming, I promise.”

Poor Mapi didn't know what to do, she looked at her girlfriend for help. Ingrid stroked your hair, your sweaty forehead making your hair stick to your skin.

“She's coming, sweet pea, isn't she Mapi?” Ingrid looked at her girlfriend urging her to say the right thing. 

“Y-yeah, Alexias on her way. She's already half way.” The defender stuttered. 

You threw your head back as another contraction rippled through your body. 

“Breath, try to breathe.” Your best friend stroked your back. 

“Mapi, let me talk to her.” Alexia said as she pressed her foot on the gas. 

“Sí, sí.” Mapi put the phone on speaker, allowing you to hear Alexia. 

“Bebé?” Alexia's voice rang over the speaker.

“Ale! Please, I need you. Come home, please!” You begged, hearing your lover's voice.

“It's okay, amor. I’m on my way. I’ll be there as soon as I can, I promise.”

“Okay.” Your lips quivered. 

“Mapi, keep me on the phone.” Alexia called out as she overtook some vehicles in front of her.

“Sí, I will. You're next to her now.” Mapi gingerly placed the phone on the table next to you. 

“I’m here okay, cariño?” 

“Yeah.” You whispered.

Ingrid stood up. “Mapi, comfort her, I’m going to call for an ambulance.”

“W-what? Me? B-but you’re so good at it.” 

Ingrid stroked her girlfriend's face. “You'll be fine baby, you can do it.”

Ingrid gave no room for argument as she started to call the ambulance service, walking out of the room.

Mapi slowly turned around, she had never been so scared before. Walking out to a stadium of 30,000 people was less scary than this. She took a deep breath before walking over to you. She slowly crouched next to your side, trying not to make any sudden movements as if she was in a cage with a wild animal. But in all honesty, you kind of sounded like one.

You felt her hand gently rub your back. “Can I get you anything? Water?” 

“Your hand.” You whimpered. 

Mapi smiled as she gave you her hand, but the smile quickly disappeared as you squeezed it with a force not known to man. 

“Dios mio! What have you been eating!” The girl cried out in pain.

Alexia couldn't help but laugh as she heard Mapi cry out. 

“I can hear you, puta!” Mapi groaned.

“Sorry Mapi, I just need you.” You sobbed as you looked at the defender.

That made Mapi smile even if she was wincing through the pain. But it made Alexia feel so guilty for not being there, even if it was out of her control.

“It's okay, breathe with me.” Mapi breathed out.

You breathed with her, but it didn't subside the pain.

Ingrid walked back in. “They’re on their way, but it won't be for another 30 to 40 minutes.

“What?!” You and Mapi shouted in unison. 

“I can't wait that long!” You cried out.

Alexia was driving as fast as she could without being too dangerous, she definitely went through a few red lights, only because the roads were clear enough, but she was more than willing to get a speeding ticket if it meant she could be with you.

“The operator said to remove your bottoms and get towels ready incase you have the baby.”

“I’m so scared, the baby’s not due for another 2 weeks.” Your voice was shaky.

“I know, sweet pea. Everything’s going to be okay, I promise.” The raven haired girl mustard up a brave smile but you could see through it, you could tell she was worried too.

Then you felt it. An agonising pain pushed right at your core. It was happening, the baby was coming. 

“AHHHHHH! It's coming!” You screamed. 

Alexia felt dread take over her body as she heard your pain.

Ingrid jumped into action, kneeling at your feet. “I'm going to pull your trousers and knickers off okay?”

You nodded. 

Ingrid quickly removed the clothing off of you. “Mapi, go get some towels.” 

Mapi went to move but you had a python grip on her hand. The defender eyed her girlfriend for help, too scared to ask you to let go herself. the Norwegian smiled sympathetically at her. 

“You may have to let Mapi go, honey.” 

You didn't even realise you were still holding on to her, you hesitantly let her hand go. You didn't miss the way Mapi winced as she stroked her own hand from the pain. 

“Okay keep breathing, nice deep breaths.” Ingrid said.

You followed her instructions, you tried to take deep breaths, but was cut short when another crippling contraction swept over your body. The pain was nothing you had ever felt before. 

“Erghh! Oh my god! It burns. It's coming, Ingrid!” 

Ingrid was between your legs, her green eyes popped open as she saw the start of your labour.

“Okay, I’m going to call again. I might need help.” She pulled her phone.

Mapi walked in just in time to see what Ingrid was talking about, you would have laughed if you weren't in so much pain. Her eyes bulged out of her head, like a cartoon character, her face turned to a shade of grey as she also saw the start of the birth. 

“Ay dios mío.” She whispered. 

Alexia heard Ingrid, she was only 10 minutes away, she was determined to get home to you. 

You screamed as you felt a deep pressure at the bottom of your back, it made you feel sick. 

“Where’s Alexia, I need her!” You cried out.

“I’m here, cariño. I’ll be there I swear!” Alexia said over the speaker.

Mapi then came back rushing over to you, the pain in your voice made her want to comfort you.

“Hey, need my hand?” The brunette smiled as she grabbed your hand.

You nodded at your friend, tears rolling down your cheeks. “Thank you.”

You took her hand as you felt Ingrid stroke your leg.

“Hello? My friends in labour. I can see the start of the baby.” Ingrid was on the phone to the operator. “Okay, thank you.”

Another jolt of pain hit you, making you squeeze Mapi’s already crushed hand. You watched her wince in pain, easing off her as much as you could.

“I’m sorry, Mapi.” You sniffled.

“No, no it's okay. I’m okay.” The Spaniard gritted her teeth as she tried to hold back her own tears.

The Norwegian put the operator on speaker. 

“Hello, I’m Julia. I’m going to talk you through the steps, okay? You’re doing great. Keep taking big deep breaths for me. How much of the baby's head can you see?” 

“I can see the baby's hair.” 

“Okay great. Can you tell me roughly a measurement?”

“Like 5cm?” Ingrid squinted.

“Okay. She’s going to be ready to push any minute now.”

Alexia was nearly home, 5 more minutes and she'd be there. Until she saw the police lights in her rear view mirror.

“Fuck!” She mumbled.

Alexia reluctantly pulled her car over to the side of the road. She quickly muted herself on her end of the call, not wanting you to hear the commotion. She tapped her finger anxiously against the steering wheel as she watched the police officer slowly approach her car. She rolled her window down ready to apologise and hopefully be on her way.

“You know you’re going over the speed limit- oh my god, Alexia Putellas! I watched your game just the other day, you played so well. How's y/n getting on? She must be close to having the baby now?” 

Before Alexia could answer you let out a high pitched scream over the speaker phone. The police officer looked at Alexia with a confused look.

“Yeah, that's actually her. That's why I’m rushing, she's in labour.” Alexia hoped that would be enough for the police to let her go.

“Oh! Oh right, why aren't you with her?”

Alexia stared at the police officer, was he really asking this?

“Erm, it's a long story, but it's why I was rushing.”

“Ah, I remember when my own were just born. There’s nothing like it.” The police man stared off into the distance, clearly reminiscing. 

Alexia smiled politely. She really didn't need this interruption.

“Ahhh! Fuck! It hurts!”  You shrieked over the phone speaker.

Alexia looked at the phone, your cries made her so anxious, she just wanted to be with you.

“Oh sorry, I’m holding you up. You get on your way. Try not to rush too quickly. Good luck with being a mama!” The police officer nodded as he went on his way, leaving Alexia to finally get home to you.

You couldn't believe this was happening. 

You were so scared that Alexia was going to miss the birth of your baby. Alexia had been with you every step of the way with the pregnancy. Every appointment, every scan, all the birthing class, she was there, holding your hand throughout it all. Now the mother of your child was out driving around town, trying to make you happy, all because you wanted a stupid fucking chocolate bar.

“Okay, give me a push.” Ingrid said.

You took a deep breath as you tried to push as hard as you could.

“Amazing, you're doing really well.” Ingrid smiled at you. 

“Well done.” Mapi gritted her teeth next to you, trying her absolute best not to sound in pain.

“Mapi, what’s going on?” Alexia shouted over the phone speaker.

Mapi jumped at the voice. She grabbed your phone with her free hand, her other hand was sweating in your own. 

“T-The babies coming.” Mapi stuttered from the pain.

“Merda.” Alexia muttered under her breath, pushing her foot on the pedal. 

“Okay, you’re doing it. I can see the top of the head! There's so much hair!” Ingrid smiled brightly. 

“There is hair Ale! The baby has hair!” Mapi repeated Ingrid’s excitement. 

Two more minutes and Alexia would be home. Just two more minutes. 

“Okay, another big push.” The nurse called out over the phone.

“Ready?” Ingrid stroked your knee, her eyes were on you, giving you a reassuring smile. 

You nodded, taking another deep breath. Your body was tired, everything hurt, and your bottom half was burning. It felt like something was ripping you apart. Like that scene from Alien. You just wanted Alexia to be here to tell you everything was going to be okay.

“Eerghhhh!” You pushed again. The pain was unreal. “No, no, no! I can't do it!”

“You can! You're doing so well! The heads out, I can see a face!” Ingrid shouted enthusiastically.

Alexia wheels screeched as she messily parked up outside, nearly forgetting to pull the handbrake up in her rush. She ran as quickly as she could to your front door, keys in hand. 

“Okay, if you can see a face you've done the hardest part. You're done really well. Another big push.” Julia’s happy voice chimed in.

Alexia rushed down the hallway, she easily jumped over the baby gates she had installed, cursing them as she leaped. She turned the corner just in time.

You looked up to see your wife standing at the door. Her face was similar to Mapi’s reaction.

“Ale.” You whispered, not having enough energy.

The blonde rushed over to you, she knelt by your side, pushing your hair off your sweaty cheeks.

“I’m here, baby. I’m right here. You’re doing so well.” She kissed your sweaty head. 

You nearly started to cry, your emotions bubbled to the surface, finally having your wife with you in the scariest and happiest moment of your life. 

She brought your hand up to her lips, kissing you as she looked into your eyes, you could see she was scared but you couldn’t miss the love she had for you.

“You ready? Another push.” Ingrid asked from your bottom half. 

Alexia squeezed your hand, reassuring you. “You've got this, baby. You can do it!”

You took another deep breath, readying your body to do what seemed impossible.

“That's it! Push, push, push, push! It's coming!” Ingrid spurred you on.

Your whole body shook as the little life entered the world.

And she was loud.

“Oh my, god. You did it!” Ingrid laughed in disbelief.

You looked down to see a tiny little baby, crying in Ingrid’s hands. 

You felt Alexia grip your hand, you looked up at the blonde, she was gazing at the baby and you swore you saw her fall in love. She was smiling from ear to ear, her hazel eyes starting to tear up.

“I can hear crying, that's amazing. Wrap the baby up, cover the head, and place the baby on mum's chest.” Julia instructed. 

Ingrid did just that, she gently and neatly wrapped your daughter up placing her on your chest. 

“A little girl.” You whispered, tears rolling down your cheeks. 

You looked up at your wife, she had tears rolling down her cheeks, as she looked at the baby on your chest. 

“She’s so beautiful.” She whispered as she kissed the top of your head. “You did so well. Are you feeling okay?” 

“I’m fine, just tired and sore.” 

She brought her lips to yours, kissing you gently. “I love you, amor. I’m sorry I wasn’t here.”

“Don’t be sorry, it wasn’t your fault. Besides, I had two very good midwives. You smiled as you looked at the couple who were now sitting next to each, smiling at your little family. 

Alexia chuckled. “Thank you so much chicas. How’s your hand Mapi?” 

“It’s seen better days, but I’m glad I could help.” The defender smiled as she pulled Ingrid closer to her.

“Do you have a name?” Ingrid asked. 

You and Alexia looked down at the already settled baby, then back at each other.

‘Rudy.” You both said in sync. 

“Rudy Maria Putellas. I like it.” Mapi smiled before Ingrid started rolling her eyes.

“No, just Rudy Putellas.” Alexia smiled, not taking her eyes off the baby.

“But, we do want to ask you guys something.” You looked at the couple in front of you. Ingrid was already smiling and Mapi looked scared all over again.

“Would you like to be Rudy's Godparents?” Alexia asked.

“100 percent, yes.” Ingrid smiled so hard her cheeks resembled a chipmunk.

You looked over at Mapi, her eyes had glazed over, she looked like she was about to cry.

“Mapi, are you okay? Are you crying?” Alexia asked in a teasing tone, smiling at her friend.

“Huh? What? Allergies. Do you have a cat? I’m allergic.”

“Mapi, we have a cat.” Ingrid smiled sympathetically at her girlfriend, knowing the girl was clearly just emotional to be asked to be a godparent.

“Hello? The door was open. Did someone call an ambulance for a mother and baby?” The ambulance crew arrived. 

“And a broken hand!” Mapi called out, rushing to the front door.

Ingrid rolled her eyes. “She’s a big softy, she would love to be a godparent to Rudy.”

You and Alexia chuckled, but your attention quickly went back to the baby on your chest as she started to squirm.

The paramedics checked you and baby Rudy over, everything was looking great, but they still took you in to get checked by the doctors and a couple hours later you were allowed to leave. 

You and Alexia gave Rudy her first bath together, laughing as she sneezed in the baby tub. Alexia dried her off and took her to her room, she got her nappy on her and creamed her little body.

“Okay, baby grow.” You mumbled as you looked through her draws.

“I actually have one mind.” Alexia looked guilty suddenly, smiling at you playfully.

She reached into another draw and pulled out a Barcelona home kit baby onesie. She turned it around to show your number on the back. Her dopey smile looked at the kit then back at you. You felt yourself go completely giddy. You looked at the woman in front of you, her proud smile made your heart melt. In that moment you felt so complete, you had your little family in front of you, with the woman that you loved with all your heart. 

“Do you like it?” She asked as she moved back to Rudy.

“I love it. I love you, Ale.” You kissed her cheek as she began to dress Rudy.

“I love you. I love both my girls.” She bopped Rudy's nose.

Finally, you got the baby down in her cot, thankfully she was already fast asleep. You smiled as you looked at her face, you could already see Alexia’s features in her. You both stood over the cot, staring at the little bundle in front of you.

Then you remembered something.

“Ale?” 

“Hmm?” 

“Did you ever get the chocolates?” 

[obae-me]

Human Things that Confuse the Non-Humans

I've seen a lot of headcanons on my feed recently that are all about demonic traits and things that seem to scare or facinate MC, but what about the opposite? So I was wondering what sort of typical human things might either unsettle the non-humans, confuse them, or enchant them in some way.

Most of these are based off of personal heasdcanons I already have, so it's very self indulgent.

If ya'll have any other ideas, feel free to share, I'd love to hear them.

Also not proof read cuz I'm writing this at like 5 am due to sleep issues.

------

Circadian Rythem. I've always wanted to bring up how I headcanon that the Devildom doesn't even follow a 24 hour schedule, since the 24 hour thing is entirely based around the sun, and since they don't have a sun, it makes sense that days would follow some other set rule (I always think that Devildom days are much much longer, hence why MC is caught so many times in canon just taking naps wherever even when Belphie is not around), but that's a headcanon for another time. Anyways, I think the fact that Humans almost need to follow a certain sleeping schedule would totally confuse the demons. Demons only really sleep to stay at their strongest, it's not as vital to them. And the fact that humans can die if they don't get the proper sleep? Totally freaks them out. If MC ever pulls an all-nighter, they all think they're one foot in the grave. Having Solomon and MC getting naturally sleepy more often than the non-humans do might seem pretty adorable at times though.

The fact that human hair does indeed shed. I don't personally think demon or angelic hair would, I feel like hair is something they can change at will within reason (There is a chat with Mammon about him getting his haircut, but he said he was going to change it, so I like to think he made it grow back instantly and cut it like normal again). So I like to think that MC or Solomon leaving strands of hair behind is shocking, because the non-humans only ever associated that trait with animals, but they also find it weirdly cute in a way. The demons and angels do try to ask to comb or brush Solomon's and/or MC's hair from time to time. They feel like they're helping.

Being able to roll (curl? Fold?) your tongue. I think it would be hilarious if despite the millions of other things demons and angels can do, none of them can roll their tongues. And then they get confused too when they discover that not every human can do it either, just certain ones. Solomon can do it and treats it like a party trick.

Allergies. I don't know if it's said in Canon anywhere that demons and angels can have allergies...I hope not because (as much as it sucks) it would make sense for it to just be a human thing. Just the concept entirely would have the non-human's heads spin. What do you mean certain things can just have your body essentially attack itself? And it's different for every human? It can be quite literally anything? (The non-humans would absolutely have a heart attack if they knew about mine)

Human mimicry. I think we as humans just have a natural instinct to mimic or repeat certain things. It's a lot more noticeable with internet culture and memes and references and things, but I think a very human thing to do is repeat or mock things we come into contact with. For example, if we hear an animal noise, we try to repeat it like we're talking to it. If we see something in a weird position, we might try to pose like it, etc. We try to relate to things, which is why personification is so prominent in everything we do. (Like how some of us tell wobbily objects to stay or loud machines to shut up) The non-humans think this is very cute. They don't really do that. The closest thing they might relate to is a current trend, but those pass by rather quickly. Mammon probably thinks we're almost like a bunch of crows.

Emotional control/suppression. Hear me out. It's well known in canon that the brothers blow up easily. They'll fight someone over miniscule things. Even Lucifer, who says he prides himself on his control, loses his temper quite often. And Mammon, while seemingly the best at controlling anger, is very open about all his other emotions. The only two demons that clearly have the best control overall are Barbatos and Diavolo who are the two most powerful demons in the Devildom. It probably takes so much energy and power to keep themselves in check. We hardly ever see that dark aura around them if at all in the game, which seems to give the two this unspoken common respect. As for angels, it was already mentioned once that the angels do have magical methods forcibly controlling emotions, and despite that, I'm sure it takes ages of training and practice to get to the level of "patient perfection" they're supposed to exhibit. Now, humans aren't perfect, and of course, there's a lot of nuance to this like mental illness I won't get into, but generally speaking, we quickly learn how to regulate our emotions or how to supress them for society's sake. At the very least, when we get angry we dont suddenly get surrounded by a dark shadow or shift into a different form. And I like to think this terrifies the non-humans to a degree. They don't know when humans are angry or upset until it's blatantly obvious. They already are off-put by Solomon because they never really know what he's up to. And what if it's not even because he's doing "weird" things, what if it's just because he seems to be so calm all the time and no one knows how to read him? None of them know how to read human body language. There's no aura to see, no puffed up wings, no glowing eyes, no whipping tails. Humans can just...stand there, sometimes with a blank expression, sometimes just staring. It can give even the stronger willed beings the creeps. Bonus points if MC is great at masking too. You mean humans can just...take extreme emotions and tuck them away for later? I'm sure that's an absolutely wild concept. Most of the non-humans are just not capable of that kind of control. Albeit its not always the healthiest option, but just the fact that humans have the willpower to just sometimes choose or force themselves not to feel at all is Barbatos level intimidating.

[blockgamepirate]

This is my petty complaint time, this video annoys me SO MUCH and even more so what annoys me is that the latest comment on it is this:

HE TAUGHT YOU SO MUCH BULLSHIT, PLEASE NO, DON'T LISTEN TO HIM

And yes, I've been thinking about this stream for nearly three years now, I've been meaning to go through it to critique Wilbur's arguments, I just never got around to it

Wilbur: "Tubbo, you've created an anti-state capitalist dystopia"

So all Tubbo had explained so far was that his town had a big company that owned two other big companies. Nothing about the government or anything. It's true that one company owning all the major businesses is pretty dystopian, sure, but I have no idea where Wilbur got the "anti-state" thing from, usually capitalist companies are fine with the existence of states, states do a lot of dirty work for the capitalists

Spoiler alert: Tubbo's city turns out to be pretty much a city state so Wilbur is just wrong anyway, not that he ever acknowledges it even when it does come up

Also it's not like corporate acquisitions are completely unheard of in the UK, as far as I know. Admittedly the UK is also arguably a capitalist dystopia but you know what I mean, the concept shouldn't be all that shocking to Wilbur

He's being so dramatic and trying to make it sound like he's caught Tubbo in a mistake or something. He also keeps asking questions and then not letting Tubbo answer properly before taking like one word Tubbo says and running with it

But this is the one that I find the most obnoxious:

T: "I did some research into like economics and stuff and I discovered this thing called UBI, have you heard of it?"

W: "What's it stand for?"

T: "Universal Basic Income"

W: "Yeah, I know about that"

He clearly does not know what UBI is.

It becomes very apparent very quickly:

W: "So you've got universal basic income but then also the rich exist still?"

T: "Yeah! Yeah they do."

W: "How does that come about then,"

T: "So in my mind--"

W: "is this universal basic income different for different people?"

T: "No, no, the universal basic income is better for everyone, just the people who have--"

W: "In order for there to be a 1% that means someone's earning more,"

T: "Yes, someone is earning more"

W: "but that means the universal basic income isn't universal!"

T: "No no no, not everyone's getting paid the same but everyone gets the same to begin with, okay? But then you can build on top of it."

W: "Oh no, you've got a-- Tubbo, you've got a fucking social point system!"

T: "Have I made a social point system??"

W: "Tubbo, you've made China!"

None of what Wilbur says makes ANY sense here. The only explanation I can think of is that he didn't know what UBI was, made an assumption that it just meant "everybody gets paid the same amount of money" or something like that and then just spoke fast enough that Tubbo couldn't correct him

Tubbo is correct here, Tubbo knows what he's talking about, but he can't out-speak Wilbur who is just throwing so much bullshit out of his mouth that there's no time to even respond

So, UBI means that everyone in the society gets a regular payment of a specific amount of money that's the same for everyone regardless of their life situation (and generally a requirement would be that it has to be enough to live on, altho people do like to water this down a lot...) This would be completely irrelevant to your wages or salary or capital gains. You can choose to either live on the UBI or you can just do the regular capitalist things to earn extra money on top of the UBI

Obviously I'm not one of those people who think that UBI would solve all of world's problems, I mean I am an anarchist and all (and not an ancap either), but it's literally just a very streamlined welfare system. That's all. It would probably be a lot better than the current models we have but it's not fundamentally different. There's nothing particularly weird about it, the point is just to make sure that everyone has enough money to live on, in every other regard it's just normal capitalism

Wilbur completely misunderstands the whole thing (because, again, he does not know what UBI is so he's just trying to imagine what it might mean based on what Tubbo is saying) and jumps immediately to something he apparently has heard of, which is the Chinese social credit system, which has nothing to do with UBI. In fact I'm pretty sure it also doesn't actually have anything to do with income either, or at least not directly, so I don't think Wilbur knows what the social credit system is either

He's literally just talking in buzzwords

Like if you actually wanted to make a leftist critique of Tubbo's city, you could, don't get me wrong. But instead Wilbur keeps insisting that he's made a social point system despite Tubbo trying to explain why it's not that at all

Wilbur just keeps yelling over Tubbo until his own chat turns against him and finally Tubbo himself also kinda gives up

And from there Tubbo also kinda just starts playing into the bit and just lets Wilbur direct the whole conversation, the rest of it is just them getting more and more into the roleplay. Wilbur keeps talking about the state pension plan, even though Tubbo already tried to explain that it's part of the UBI (this actually is how UBI is supposed to work, it does indeed streamline most of the welfare spending! Obviously you can still raise questions about that (I can think of a few at least) but Wilbur didn't let Tubbo explain so I have no idea what Tubbo actually had in mind)

I could try to go through all of what Wilbur says here but it's just too much, so maybe some other time. Although to be honest there are so many other streams that I probably should talk about instead that some fans unfortunately took a bit too seriously because they assumed Wilbur knew what he was talking about

My point here is mainly that just because someone sounds really confident and knows a bunch of buzzwords doesn't mean they know what they're talking about.

[simpleeindulge]

Yummy🔞

Info: fem/readerxLuffy, implied relationship, MDI, soft food kink, detailed, licking, kissing, cunnilingus, some consensual intercourse🔞

Context: Luffy finds out he has a kink. ‼️Warning: Detailed‼️

……

Luffy didn't know what it was about licking food off your skin that made it taste so good; it just did.

He discovered his new fascination nearly a week ago while spending some time with you. It was an innocent situation; you were curled up in the library with a steaming cup of hot chocolate. Sanji had topped your drink with a generous swirl of whipped cream, and some had gotten on your chin.

What Luffy did was something you had done to him countless times. He licked the cream from your chin.

"Ah! Luffy!" You gasped and shivered as you stared in shock at him.

Luffy felt an internal quake as he drew his tongue back into his mouth as he watched you jump while hearing you gasping. The cream tasted better and sweeter, and your reaction made it all the tastier.

He wondered if that's why you would kiss or lick his face when had cream or chocolate on his face. It was a mean trick of you not to share this secret delight with him!

Since that day, Luffy couldn't get the idea out of his mind. Whenever his mind wandered, he thought about other foods that would taste good on your skin. Syrup, chocolate, ketchup, caramel, ice cream...

"What else, what else," He mumbled to him as he fished off the side of the Sunny. "Cheese? Pasta? Meat?"

"Thinking of what you want Sanji to cook?" Robin asked from her chair. She was relaxing in her favorite reading spot and couldn't help overhearing Luffy talking to himself.

Luffy glanced at her and said honestly, "I'm trying to think of foods that would taste good with Y/N's skin."

Robin's expression did not change, and she hummed as she processed what Luffy said.

"You mean, what food would taste good eating off Y/N's body?" She clarified.

"Yeah," Luffy replied as he shrugged. "I've only tried whipped cream so far."

Robin giggled since she knew what Luffy had done to you days ago when you had vented to her.

Sex was something that occurred rarely between you and Luffy. Luffy did enjoy the feeling, but there were other things he enjoyed doing more with you.

So long as Luffy met your minimal needs each month it didn't matter because you had other ways of being intimate with him. But when Luffy licked you, you felt something you didn't expect and the look in his eyes didn't help.

“Well, from what I understand, most people use fruits and cream or chocolate,” Robin said mischievously.

“Not meat?” Luffy said with a pout.

Robin smiled at her captain, and thinking it would help two people she cared about get closer she used her powers to get a magnize from Sanji’s “secret stash.”

“Here, have a look and see if Y/n will be willing to play along,” Robin suggested with a wink.

…

“No! Absolutely not!”

“But Y/N…”

“There is no way I am putting that between my legs!” You shouted as you pointed at the chuck of meat Luffy held up by the bone.”

“Aww, but why?” Luffy pouted.

“Because one, it's weird; two, it’s not sanitary; and three, knowing you, it would be dangerous!” You explained as you crossed your arms.

Luffy sighed and took a bite of his meat and ate it with a sulky look.

“I just wanted to see what else would taste good with you.”

You shivered as you thought about how his tongue had licked the cream clean of your chin. It was a type of intimacy you had yet to experience with Luffy. And lord knows he is food motivated.

It might be fun to try.

You sighed and picked up the can of whipped cream Robin had given you. Somehow, she knew you would need it.

“Luffy, if this is something you want to try, let’s start with something simple.”

You smile and playfully shake the can at him.

Luffy had just taken a bite of his meat and he stared at you wide-eyed. He then swallowed down hard and gave you a huge grin. It was the same grin he always used when he is about to do something he found fun.

“Alright!” He excitedly cried and reached to take the can from you.

You moved it out of the way, saying, “Hold on! There is one rule you have to promise to follow.”

“Huh?” Luffy said as his grin dropped.

“No teeth. If you bite me, I will end you.” You said darkly.

Luffy frowned and said, “It's whipped cream, who bites whipped cream?”

“You would!” I stated loudly. Luffy put up his hands and laughed.

“Shishishi, okay, I promise not to bite you.”

You huffed and then moved to the bed. Your eyes then held his gaze as you removed your top. Luffy watched as you removed your bra and then your panties. It was impossible to tell what he was thinking. His eyes became wide pools of black that made you shiver.

He saw you, and though he didn't physically react by blushing, sweating, breathing harder, or licking his lips, you knew he saw you. It was the sudden intensity that told you.

You pulled up your hair and then shook the can as you continued to stare into his eyes. The cool cream made you wince and gasp as you covered the tops of your breasts. You were about to invite Luffy to taste the cream but he was already on top of you.

He moved fast, pushing you on your back as your legs hung over the edge of the bed. Luffy eyed the cream and without being told started licking it off your skin.

“L-Lufffy!”

He didn't slow his movements as his tongue dragged over your skin. When his lips came near a nipple, Luffy sucked it into his mouth, causing your back to arch. A strained whine left your throat, and you saw stars behind your eyes.

He licked and sucked hard, then let the bud pop out his mouth to lick at the cream that hid under and between your breasts.

“Is there more?” Luffy asked as stared down at your glossy skin.

You were panting hard and trying to think. Luffy then spotted the can on the bed and snatched it up.

“Luffy wait!”

Luffy sprayed the cream over your belly. He then ran his tongue over the vulnerable skin and dipped around your belly button. The sensation made your toes curl and your cunt wet. It was hard to breathe and yet it felt amazing as the light tickling sensation sent waves of tantalizing pleasure down between your legs.

Your palms pressed down onto the bed as you lay back and enjoy the treatment you are getting. Luffy hooked an arm under one of your legs and shifted the two of you. You licked your lips as waited for what was about to come next.

Luffy used the rest of the can between your legs. He was about to dig in when you warned him in a honeyed voice, “Luffy, no biting.”

He paused and looked at you with that goofy grin you love so much.

“I know, I know!” Luffy replied with a cheerful laugh.

He then lapped at the white cream like a cat and moaned as your juices added a tang to the sweet taste. His tongue flicked at your clit and then spread over from the bottom of your pussy to the top.

The string of nerves surrounding your pussy pulled tighter and tighter. Your voice became hard to control as Luffy’s tongue swirled and dripped into your core. His mouth would then suck at the sensitive folds and his lips would tease the top of your mount as he search for more cream.

The strained cries you made were nothing but background noise as Luffy feasted on you. And yet, the strings coiled tighter and tighter, ready to launch you into oblivion.

“Ah! Luffy!”

There was no more cream for him to lick but Luffy kept going as he imagined other foods he could eat from here. Bananas, peaches, chocolate, cake, gummy bears, bacon, meat…

“Luffy…Luffy!”

Meat with gravy, syrup, pancakes with syrup? He thought hard as his mouth sucked on you as he became intoxicated by your smell. Something tangy sprayed onto his top lip and he moaned as him licked it into his mouth.

Tangerines, strawberries, melon…

“Luffy! Please…Stop!”

Luffy halted and breathed hard. His eyes glanced at you as your juices still covered his mouth. You were panting just as hard as you tried to relax from the intense orgasm you had just experienced.

He licked his lips clean as he noticed how your body trembled with aftershocks and moved over you without touching.

“Oops, did I overdo it?” Luffy asked, looking concerned and curious.

You smiled at him and lightly laughed then moaned at the tight spasm in your lower belly.

“Only a little, but it felt good.”

“Oh? Will that’s good I guess.” Luffy replied as you stroked his face.

“Hey, Y/n?”

“Hmm?”

Luffy licked his lips and let his erection rub against your belly. You gasped and closed your eyes then looked at him.

“Can I? It won't go away and it hurts.”

You breathed and nodded your head. You didn't even bother to tell Luffy to be gentle as he entered you. After what he had just did, he deserved a nice reward.

“Hey…Y/n…” Luffy groaned as he moved at a decent pace into you. “Can we try peaches next time? The kind with syrup juice?”

You let out a delirious giggle as you held onto what little sanity you had left.

“Sure…let’s try it next time…”

Luffy grinned as stored the promise away. He will think about it later, now, he was with you and it was delicious.

He bent and kissed you, pushing his tongue inside to taste your mouth. Yes. Simply, delicious.

[triannel]

hello!!<3 if you don't want to write this it’s okay, but then please reply to this post somehow because damn otherwise i end up waiting like a hachiko ;(

how about bill and reader had a deal but eventually their interactions developed into some kind of relationship (?). i don't know, in short bill became very attached to the reader but something happened and they had a fight which cancelled the deal

time passed and bill still couldn't forget reader. and now, already being in a mental hospital, bill is sitting in general therapy in a circle with everyone else, with an empty look at the floor "i don't want to be here, they made me" in his eyes, and then suddenly one of the therapists says: "so, i want to introduce you to a new patient: y/n!"

bill, hearing this name, is shocked because how did this even happen, and the reader just smiled

ps english is not my first language i'm writing this by translation, sorry for mistakes i love you❤️

Greetings and here! I've made the reader more powerful on this one and don't worry about your grammar, it doesn't bother me at all.

After making a deal with the devil, it was fine for a while. You were one of the few powerful beings in the 3rd dimension. Giving insight on possible areas on earth and other planets that might be weak enough to tear through Bill's location is the deal you've made with him.

You give insight and he will in turn return the favor afterwards. The deal made with him will be interesting though as for the first time in a long while he's the one who will have to wait for your word. Usually he's the one to always state what the deal will be about and what he will give in return. But this time you're the one stating what he will give in return.

The longer the deal went on, you couldn't exactly make up your mind at the moment so of course Bill will start to suggest possible ways he could be of use to you just to make sure that you are not going to back out on the deal. He's not useless! He's an all seeing being! He knows lots of things remember? Why would you ever think of backing out?

The longer it went on, the more you managed to form quite a bond with this devil. Often will he be by your side, wondering when you'll finally tell him what you need, and he will keep on trying to convince you of the possible things he could do for you.

Soon he does start to fall head over heels for you but unfortunately you couldn't say the same. You decided that the best thing he could do for you is to possibly bring back your dead lover.

Of course he will be distraught by this, and would most likely try to bargain what he should instead do. Once you do question why, he would become very defensive and soon this will end the deal between the two of you.

No way, no how will he do that. He can't be replaced- both of you aren't even in an established romantic relationship...but he just can't bear the thought of losing you over someone already dead.

In the end though both of you separate, leaving a bitter taste on his end and just a confusing one on yours.

You never really did notice his passing glance and extremely charming comments, you were simply contemplating on wether it was a good idea to even ask of him to bring back your dead lover.

After a few years though, you end up in a mental health facility. Surprisingly Bill is there too. Sitting on a char amongst other patient, a bored and depressed look looms over his face as he stared at the ground.

As the facilitators introduce you, once he hears your name he jolts up, awake and excited to see you.

Walking to the conveniently empty chair beside him, you sit down comfortably. You don't exactly hold a grudge against him, since you haven't exactly held up the part of your deal as he did break it up before you even had the chance to discover an area suitable to tear through.

It will be awkward at first but over time perhaps the both of you will end up talking like you did before the 'break-up'. It will be hard for him to explain the outburst though so you need to be patient with him as he come to terms to the possible embarrassment he may have as he would ultimately confess his feelings to you.

[wayfayrr]

I offer the idea of soft times with sage

Braiding hair, just cuddling with each other and overall spending time with one another.

- 🍄

(It’s been a bit lmao, college kicked me in the shins)

sorry it's been a while since you sent this, I relate with uni being a bitch though :')

I'm gonna use this ask though to put it out that I'm no longer going to be writing for Sage, however I won't stop writing totk link altogether - instead I've been creating a link that's more inline for how I see his character and for how I'm comfortable to write <3 I've been calling him Tears so far and I have to thank a lot of my mutuals for chipping in ideas with a special mention to @glowyskull for coming up with some of the best headcanons I think I've ever heard (the last three are courtesy of them) <333 @h4wari, @mushroomwoods, @sketchyspook here's the boy you were waiting for!!! (thank you all for your help too <333)

and without any more hesitation here he is!!

✦ he got the nickname tears for a reason, anything and everything will set this boy off. he's a true crybaby and will certainly use it to try and win your attention from the others. It's not always cause he's sad though, sometimes things can just get overwhelming 

✦ his memory can be a bit spotty, unlike wild he rushed through his previous quest, not that he's all that fussed about missing those memories - making new positive ones are more important to him

✦ like his counterpart, he's got a couple of different nicknames, tears is the most prominent however architect does tend to show itself fairly often. messing around to see what different kinds of contraptions he can make is one of his favourite pastimes, one he'll happily share if given the chance.

✦ wild and him have been assumed many times to be identical twins, seeing as his stint in the shrine of ressurection put a halt to most of his aging processes. not that he doesn't bring up his actual age every now and then for a little shock factor

✦ thankfully they're easy to tell apart, seeing as tears discovered how to dye his hair and paint his nails quickly into his second quest, leading to his hair forever being stained with a multitude of different colours while his nails change colour nearly every other day

✦ his cheeky side is still very much there though, ready to make the dumbest puns you've ever heard and to not stop till you're laughing no matter how hard you cringe at them when he starts.

✦ one of the most affectionate links, willing to do basically anything you ask him to and even things you didn't. give him the smallest hint you like a certain food? what do you mean it's a little suspicious he suddenly has all of its ingredients for it - he simply wanted to try it himself, can you tell him if it tastes right?

✦ He hates to see anyone crying, especially his significant other, nine times out of ten it’ll end up with him crying at your side but he’s always there at your side to cheer you up. If you can’t bring yourself to speak about whatever is upsetting you though? Luckily for him a simple kiss of your tears is enough to show him the memory that hurt you. Thankfully it also goes for the happier ones.

✦ Your smile and praise is something he simply lives for, headpats being his favourite way to receive it, leave him alone with belongings for too long though and when you come back he’s standing next to them with a blinding smile having fused a lot of them to each other or to something he thinks would be useful for you to have. Granted the journal flame thrower combination might not have been his brightest moment. 

✦ the same desire can come out in other ways though, such as giving you different nicknames with his personal favourite calling you his sundelion. Sometimes he really shows how much he likes that nickname by making you flowercrowns as surprises. Granted every now and then he takes it a little too far, telling you you’re all he needs to heal from the gloom instead of taking any real treatment.

Tending the fire is probably one of the easiest and most calming tasks I could’ve been given today, it’s nice to have something to zone out with after a whole day on the road. Not that I can complain about it though, we didn’t run into any monsters or other threats and travelling was calm. Who’s trying to get my attention by tapping me on the back though?

“[name]? Mind if I come sit with you for a bit, I'd like to get to know you better if that's alright.”

“Yeah of course Tears, If we’re going to be traveling together for a while it makes a lot of sense too.”

This man is a sweetheart I can tell, just from saying yes to him he’s already got the most coy smile on his face; it’s like his face is practically glowing from it when he sits. Shuffling closer to my side almost like he’s asking if it’s alright for him be be this close, with the way the firelight is illuminating him is making me question if the warmth on my face is really from the fire or not now. Just distract yourself with something before you get any redder. 

“Oh? You’ve got something in your hair, one second-”

The moment I plucked the stick out of his hair he froze up, his cheeks flushing before relaxing. 

“Are - are you good? Sorry I should’ve asked first.”

“No, no, no it’s alright I just… didn’t expect it?”

“Yeah I know, next time I’l-”

“Actually would you um mind playing with my hair? I ah never really get the chance to relax like this.”

Well isn’t that simply adorable, I would be heartless to say no to such a request. Besides, I know wild has some of the softest hair possible so the chance to play with it? No way am I going to miss that if all that visible dye hasn’t fried it to bits.

“If that’s what you want then I won’t say no.”

“Really?”Is he - no he can’t be, or maybe… is he so starved of affection that he’d tear up over something this small, the more I think about it, it does make sense. Playing with his hair is so relaxing I almost missed the fact that he was starting to tear up more, all I can hope for is that they’re not from him being upset.

[googleitlol]

If Dove's store went into the Lmk universe/storyline, how whould dove react to Mk? And Wukong being put into another circlet??

I'm sorry for how off the rails this ask is going to get, I'm including a lot of other stuff besides your questions cuz I've already thought about this a lot.

@marcu-bug and I have brought it up to each other before, and in LMK… Dove is reincarnated. Will I explain why?

…Not yet :D

For this, Dove is sort of like a maternal figure to MK (He's got so many dads, why not add a mom friend?). I have a oneshot planned where I'll go more into her character, but I imagine in the lmk universe, she’d be a paramedic that usually stops by Pigsy’s for lunch. Dinner too if she’s had a long day. Which is most days.

She definitely gets a lot of those ‘worried-parent’ feelings around MK and Mei, with how often they go jumping at the chance to do dumb shit. She’s seen a lot of things, but dear lord do those to take the cake for number of calls she’s had to respond to. Actually, that’s probably how she first discovered the noodle shop, responding to a call Pigsy made when Mei took MK for a ride on her motorcycle and they crashed. I imagine like an old bartender, Pigsy would listen to her rants about her shift with Tang enjoying a bowl next to her. Being a paramedic is tough, having her gift is helpful but sometimes Dove is running into hostile situations on the job. Sometimes she sees something that shakes her, but Pigsy and Tang are there to listen at the end of the day. It also helped her to unwind by hearing Tang tell MK all about the Journey to the West and the Monkey King. It'd be a lie to say she wasn't a little intrigued by his stories, just a bit.

She joins the monkie gang when the pilot begins and helps out when she can, and funnily enough, Red Son gets pretty uncomfortable around her. Not that she gets to join her friends too often, and for a very specific reason. Sun Wukong. At first, Dove thinks he's a generally cold guy, he's always on his mountain, doesn't socialize much, and he's pretty standoff-ish around her. But after seeing how he is with MK, she quickly realizes that isn't the case.

Okay, he's just an ass, then. A confusing one, at that.

It seems like Monkey King will do whatever it takes to avoid her, but at the same time, he pushes himself into her life in the most frustrating ways imaginable. Nearly anytime she's invited to do anything fun with her friends or go on any sort of adventure, she gets a call from her building manager that something is leaking in her apartment, or a strange call from her boss asking if she can do another shift last-minute, only for them to be none the wiser about ever asking her to do that. Dove didn't realize who was behind these strange happenings, but when she figured it out, boy was she pissed.

It's not uncommon to see Dove and Wukong arguing, much to MK's dismay. She just doesn't get why he's decided to hate her, he doesn't even know her! One time, he asked her to help a monkey of Flower Fruit Mountain that needed medical help, but when she got there, he left her stranded on the mountain while he went on vacation! Dove couldn't see the mainland for days until MK and Tang visited the mountain for a separate reason about some giant dumpling. It doesn't get much better when the team has to go looking for the Samadhi rings. If anything, it gets worse. Monkey King is so aggravated to even have Dove with them, she'd half-expect that he wanted her left to be frozen in the city with Lady Bone Demon! He doesn't want her anywhere near the ritual where they form the fire. The unfriendly behaviour doesn't stop until, well, Amnesia Rules…

When Monkey King loses his memory and gives her this look of shock, the last thing she expects is for him to scoop her into his arms with the tightest hug she's ever experienced. A flip switched in his attitude towards her, and it's made all the more confusing after he explains that Pigsy is Zhu Bajie and Tang is Tang Sanzang

"Who do you think I am, then?"

"You're my one and only, Love-Dove!"

She's not sure what's worse, that god-awful nickname or the fact that he thinks he's in love with her! Although, as the day goes by… she can't say she's unopposed to seeing this much friendlier side of him. Even if she only got to see it for a little while.

It likely wouldn't be until Wukong is about to face LBD that he finally admits to her why he was so upset about her being there, how she was the reincarnation of his one and only love. A love he lost, in a way that he could only blame himself. He couldn't bear the thought of putting her near harm's way again, not when their mission revolved around a power that was responsible for her past life's death (I might go into it in another ask/post, this is getting long)

After learning all of what they'd gone through in her past life, Dove is… apprehensive, to say the least. Some of his actions from the past, they make sense to her now, but it doesn't make her forgive him completely. Still, she remembers how Sun Wukong was when he had lost his memory… she would like to see that side of him more.

It takes them time to get past their rocky start (these two can never just start off liking each other smh), but in time, Dove starts to see more of that side she'd seen during Amnesia Rules. And she starts to fall for him all over again. He tells her about her past life, their time together on the journey, all of it. He admits how he robbed her of immortality… and how she tricked him into wearing the circlet. Their ups and their downs, he tells her everything. By the time season 5 rolls around, they're happy together. He's even offered her an immortal peach from the tree he's grown on FFM, so that he can finally make up for the mistake he made all those years ago.

Then… Li Jing puts the circlet on Wukong, again.

The moment Dove finds out, she's furious. How could they hurt him like that again?! Wukong tries to put her mind at ease, but it takes a lot to calm her down. "It's fine, Dove… I was honestly pretty disappointed. He put it on and just left, at least you were creative about it back in the day." That night, in the back of Sandy's van, Dove is littering his head in kisses, she can hardly imagine how painful it must feel. You best believe the moment they see Li Jing chasing them, she's aiming whatever she can find straight for his head. If he thinks he can induce some magic migraine on her man like that, she'll find a way to pay back the favour, tenfold. Nobody touches her Sun Wukong but her.

[thedrarrylibrarian]

Hi! Thanks for running this amazing blog! Lately I've been feeling like reading Drarry fics that would have some nice Harry & Ginny friendship in them, but haven't really been able to find any. You got any recs? Thanks again!

I cannot abide fics in which Ginny is the bad guy! Even in fics where the break up between Harry and Ginny is difficult and complicated, I fully believe that they eventually make it back into friendship. Book Ginny is such a badass, and has nothing but love and support for her best bud, Harry Potter.

Harry and Ginny Friendship

another bridge will have to burn. by anonymous (1,673 words, rated T)

Harry certainly didn't expect to see Draco Malfoy and Pansy Parkinson at a queer Muggle club. He didn't see any of this coming, really.

Elocution by Shaddyr (1,721 words, rated T)

End of the year bonfire night at Hogwarts. Firewhiskey is flowing freely, Ginny is nosy, Harry is rambling and Malfoy just wants to help...

Silver Linings by @kittycargo (2,480 words, rated T)

Harry and Ginny have a long overdue conversation.

Knowing Who I was Before by @janieohio (2,670 words, rated T)

Breaking up is hard, but for Harry and Ginny, staying together isn’t an option if they each want the other to be happy.

Ginny | Your Local Lesbian's Guide to Wooing Draco Malfoy by @skooffuskaild (3,931 words, rated T)

Your Local Lesbian's Guide to Wooing Draco Malfoy by Ginevra Weasley (author of critically acclaimed tome Taking the Broom Out of The Closet: A Memoir and Six Signs You're A Lesbian) is a helpful step-by-step introduction to the confusing and exciting world of courting Malfoy heirs!

Or, Harry and Ginny bond over being queer kids, and manage to successfully ask out Draco Malfoy.

As it was (you know it's not the same) by queercodedvillain (15,832 words, rated T)

Harry's navigating a life he thinks he doesn't deserve and honestly, didn't really think he'd have. For some reason that means a whole lot of Draco Malfoy.

Seeker's High by @corvuscrowned (40,178 words, rated M)

Harry Potter doesn’t expect to take up running years after the war ends; it just sort of happens.

He also doesn’t expect that ��� as he fights tooth and nail to climb out of a post-war depression he didn’t realize he’d fallen into — he’ll end up running right into the arms of Draco Malfoy.

A half angsty drama, half romcom of Harry working on himself, learning how to accept help from his friends, and falling in love with his childhood nemesis.

Blood and Fire by @lqtraintracks (44,888 words, rated E)

Harry has spent the last twelve years in Romania, not returning to England as often as he knows he should. It's complicated. But when Ginny asks him to be her best man and help her plan her wedding, he can't say no. Having a reckoning with his choices, with himself, won't be easy. To say nothing of seeing Draco again.

Nearly Lost Things, Carefully Tended by @norelationtoatticus (46,653 words, rated E)

Three years after the war, Harry is lost, drifting, and feeling left behind. In an effort to get control of his life, he commits to cleaning out Grimmauld Place top-to-bottom and forcing it to be a home, whether it likes it or not. The rotten old house is stuffed full of antiques, and Harry is shocked to discover none other than Draco Malfoy running the local antique shop. Malfoy is polite -- too polite, and Harry soon finds himself with a mission: to annoy and bother Malfoy with the most hideous, absurd antiques he can find. But along the way, Harry comes to appreciate Draco, his work, and the power of connecting to the people who came before him. It's a hard lesson, but Harry learns that if he wants to build a future, he has to reconnect to his past, and Draco might just be the one to help him do it.

A Gift of True Esteem by @teledild0nix (53,965 words, rated E)

Professor Draco Malfoy believes he has something unique to bring to Hogwarts' History of Magic course. Professor Harry Potter is willing to be convinced.

Had To Be You @lettersbyelise (59,020 words, rated E)

Draco Malfoy is possibly the last person Harry expects to find at the wheel of a Muggle car, on a beautiful summer day on the road to London.

This is the story of how Harry runs into Draco once, twice, three times, and how he doesn’t leave their next meeting to chance.

Such Great Heights by aideomai (93,302 words, rated E)

Draco Malfoy, wide-eyed and pale and in a decidedly ragged shirt, was crouched next to the pile of whatever the dragon had been eating.

Harry threw himself to a halt and yelled, “Merlin, how many times do I have to save your life?”

❤️ As always, if you find a fic you enjoy, please remember to leave the author a kudos or a comment! ❤️

Lots of Love and Happy Reading!

[lovingseventeen]

hi! i just discovered your writing and you are so so talented. if possible, can you write how the members would react to finding out their s/o is sick? maybe with them trying to hide it, or the members are so busy and their partner didn’t want to tell them :)

svt when they find out their s/o is sick *ੈ✩‧₊˚

a/n: we are here for soft svt feels. also this got hella long because i have no chill LOL. also things may seem a little redundant bc the reader is always at home BUT you SHOULD be staying home if you're not feeling well !!

ALSO ALSO THANK YOU all for 700 followers! i hope this is a good present ♡

seungcheol:

❥ you knew he tended to have a lot on his plate as a leader of one of the most successful groups

❥ so you figured you didn't have to tell him you weren't feeling great. it's just a little cold after all

❥ you decide to take a nap, maybe sleep will lighten how you feel

❥ meanwhile, seungcheol sends you a little text, just his usual habit of checking up on you when he can, when you don't respond

❥ they're probably busy, he thinks, though it's a little out of character when 2 hours later, you haven't even opened his message

❥ somehow he gets out of practice early that day, so he decides to surprise you, bringing over some pastries from a bakery near the company building

❥ he's shocked to see a very fatigued you open your door

❥ "cheol?"

❥ immediately, his body fills with so much worry he almost doesn't know where to start

❥ "y/n? are you okay- wait, actually lets get you to sit first" he rambles, heart breaking when he sees you walk so slowly to your couch

❥ "what brought you over here? don't you usually have dance practice today?" you asked, voice quieter than usual

❥ "we got out early, but that doesn't matter, you're sick? why didn't you tell me?"

❥ "it's not that bad and you have so many things to worry about-" you try, only to be interrupted by your very concerned boyfriend

❥ "forget about all those other things!" he says with a slight pout, "i can't believe you've been alone when you're like this, that's it, i'm cancelling my day tomorrow"

❥ "you don't need to do that!" you protest, but he's already shooting someone -his manager probably- a text

❥ he partially wants to scold you for not telling him sooner but he can't argue with you in this state. his eyes look at you softly, noticing that you're leaning your head on the couch as you sit up, concluding that your head probably hurts too

❥ "y/n, i want to take care of you, okay? it hurts to see you like this, so just let me, okay?"

❥ definitely starts researching on home remedies and what medicine to buy as you lay your head on his lap

jeonghan:

❥ he was looking forward to your date at the end of the week, up until you sent him a text saying that you didn't think you could still make it

❥ hannie something came up so i don't think i can still go out on friday :(

❥ oh? are you alright at least? he replies

❥ yeah yeah i am, just work things :((

❥ he still wants to see you that day though, so he decides to try to surprise you by picking you up at your job with a little bouquet of flowers

❥ little does he know, you haven't been to work for a couple days, taking your sick leave

❥ um i'm here outside, can it at least drive you home? he sends

❥ at the sight of this text, you're calling him

❥ "hi baby" he says, and you can already tell he's smiling on the other end of the line

❥ "hi" you replied softly, "um, i'm not at work"

❥ this catches his off guard, "you're not?"

❥ "i've been home all week because i haven't been feeling well, but i also didn't want to worry you.." you explain, feeling awful over him being outside of your job

❥ "you're sick?" he asks, getting back into his car to continue the call

❥ "a bit, but it's not that bad!" you try to tell him

❥ "i'll come over" he tells you, but not before stopping by at a restaurant to bring you some hearty soup

❥ you greet him at your door with a mask on and even then he can tell that your eyes are tired. "sorry you went all the way over there"

❥ "that's okay i just wanted to see you, but you know it's my job to worry about you, right?" as he says this he holds out the bag of noodle soup towards you.

❥ "you should eat up so you get better" he urges, motioning for you to walk into your house

joshua:

❥ you guys have gotten into the habit of sending each other occasional pictures of what you're up to

❥ this particular day, he was recording and he sent you a cute little selfie from the recording booth. he even took a picture of the boys watching him record too, and of course, they all posed for the picture LOL

❥ you send him back an innocent selfie from home, but you weren't slick enough to hide the box of tissues and the bottle of medicine form the background

❥ he's calling you after his session is done (with a thumbs up from woozi). "hey darling, are you feeling alright? i noticed the medicine in the back of your photo?"

❥ "oh it's nothing," you assure him, "just a cold, not a big deal"

❥ "that's not nothing" he says softly, "do you need anything? have you eaten yet? are you drinking enough water?"

❥ after you answer yes to all of his questions, telling him not to worry, he concedes partially, but he still thinks about you throughout the day

❥ he checks up on you throughout the day, occasionally sending you random life hacks and home remedies to make you feel better

❥ you have to text him that no, you are not putting garlic in your socks or ears

❥ josh i really really appreciate the concern but it's really not that serious

❥ but if this works! you could feel better by tomorrow! <33

❥ he unfortunately can't come over because his schedule is a bit swamped, but he tells you not to cook anything tonight and orders food for you so you can take it easy

jun:

❥ when he surprises you on one of his days off, he winds up very surprised too

❥ when you open your door you raise your eyebrows as he takes in the sight of you. frankly, he can tell you might've not gotten enough sleep and that your nose is a little red (probably because it's runny?)

❥ "you're sick? why didn't you tell me?"

❥ he's ushering you to your bed and tucking you in

❥ he sits on the floor, facing you as he slightly tilts his head to the side and places a hand to your cheek

❥ "does your head hurt?" a weak nod. "throat too?" another nod. "do you want me to make you some tea?" you nod again, "okay baby"

❥ he's walking out of your room to go brew some tea and eventually he comes back with a mug and places it on your nightstand, "it's still really hot so maybe give it a couple minutes"

❥ as he's walking out of your room he pauses, "hey, call me if you need anything okay? you should probably rest up for now, i won't bother you, but i'll just be in your living room" he tells you, pulling your blanket up a little higher

❥ "thank you junnie" you say, voice barely above a whisper

❥ "of course"

❥ a couple hours later, he practically tip toes into your room just to retrieve the empty cup of tea from your nightstand, careful not to wake you

❥ you were falling in and out of sleep anyways, so you woke up to see his figure so carefully lifting the mug

❥ when he catches you watching him he goes, "oh shit, did i make a noise or something?" and you're shaking your head

❥ "is it okay you're spending your day off like this?" you asked, feeling bad knowing that he didn't have a lot of free time

❥ "like what?"

❥ "you know, cooped up inside with someone who's been sleeping all day"

❥ he crouches down to run a hand through your hair. "baby it's not your fault you're sick, it's really okay. if anything, it's a rest day for me too and i get to catch up on some shows" he assures

hoshi:

❥ you know he's been busy creating choreography recently, so you haven't seen him in about two weeks

❥ (you also don't tell him because you know he'll try to kiss you without regards to himself getting sick)

❥ but when you say no to him coming over your entire plan of getting better by yourself goes out the window

❥ "baby! i'll come over after practice today, i think we'll wrap up early!" he says when he calls. this causes you to rack your brain for excuses for him not to

❥ "oh that's okay you don't have to, aren't you tired, baby?"

❥ "never too tired to come see my baby" he gushes and your heart aches because you can hear the smile in his voice

❥ "but don't you have to be up tomorrow too?" you try

❥ his voice turns a little less excited. "do you not want me to come over? what's wrong?"

❥ "no! no, it's not that, it's just i don't want you to be too tired" you're really fighting for your life here

❥ "i'm not too tired, i'll see you later today" he tells you, but you can't miss the change in his voice

❥ as he's driving over he's thinking over how you were speaking. why didn't you seem excited about him coming over? usually you were.. were you tired of him? was there someone else? he tried to fight his racing thoughts and the little hurt in his heart

❥ when you open your door he misses the mask that you were wearing, as he makes his way inside

❥ "where is he?" he asks and suddenly you can see the tears welling in his eyes

❥ "soonyoung, where's who?" you ask frantically

❥ "someone's here, aren't they? does he make you happier?" and there's a heartbreaking crack in his voice

❥ "what? no!" you grasp onto his arm, "what are you talking about?"

❥ "it's why you didn't want me to come over right?" he asks, eyes searching yours, when he finally sees the mask, "why are you wearing that at home?"

❥ "baby i'm sick, no one's here. there's no one else at all" you explain, closing your eyes for a moment because this is the most you've walked all day and your head is pounding

❥ he softens at the sight, "oh i'm so sorry" and he's immediately helping you walk to your couch, "i'm so stupid"

❥ "just didn't want to get you sick too" you explained, gently pushing away from his chest because he's pulling you into him, "probably shouldn't get too close to me"

❥ "i don't care" he dismisses, "let me hold you"

❥ you're too weak to escape his hugs on a regular day, much less now, so you give in

❥ you lightly smack his arm as your head is against his chest, "did you really think i was cheating"

❥ a gentle squeeze. "no, but the thought really scared me"

❥ "well, you shouldn't ever be scared of that. where else are you gonna find a horanghae supporter as loyal as me?"

❥ finally, the two of you are laughing

wonwoo:

❥ i don't think he'd be the type to get super upset at you not telling him sooner, but he does make every effort to make your life easier as soon as he knows

❥ why potentially argue with his love when they're already sick? he figures

❥ when he comes over to see you walking around with a blanket wrapped around you he already knows

❥ the two of you spend the day on the couch not doing much, he's just keeping you company, giving your leg some random rhythmic pats as you just lay there

❥ but as soon as you're starting to sit up, he's on alert

❥ "what is it? do you need something?"

❥ "just gonna get water" you reply, but he's getting up already, patting your leg again

❥ "i got it, just stay here"

❥ and it's a series of small things that day, water, tea, your medicine, he'll get all of it so you can rest and recover

❥ almost helps you get up to walk when you laugh and tell him you have enough energy to walk yourself to the bathroom

❥ though he doesn't scold you for not telling him sooner, he does remind you at some point, "i'm always here for you, for anything"

woozi:

❥ a tad bit whiny when he has to find out that you're sick through your story

❥ you get a text that says you know you're supposed to tell me these things y/n

❥ what things? you asked, brain working a little bit slower than usual as you were indeed feeling a little bit clouded

❥ that you're sick >:( and not being taken care of >:((

❥ i can handle it, it's okay

❥ then you receive a simple no, followed by a it's not okay

❥ will search up a good shake to make for sick people and drop it off at your house before he has to go back to the studio

❥ gives you a disappointed look for not telling him sooner but this facade breaks before he leaves you. he still asks, "but really, y/n, are you okay? because i can probably tell the company i have an emergency-"

❥ you wave off the offer, "jihoon, go make your music," you chuckled, "frankly i think the worst of it has passed, i'm okay, really"

❥ he nods, but still looks at you a little skeptically, "are you sure?"

❥ "yes, yes"

❥ "okay, so i'll head out for now, but i'll try to come by again when i'm done," he says, starting to walk down the hall towards the elevator, "i'll text you first and if you don't reply i'll assume you're sleeping and i'll just come back tomorrow, okay?"

❥ "okay, that works" you agree, chuckling as he keeps turning back as he walks away

❥ "you're still sure?"

❥ "i'm sure" you confirm

❥ "are you really? i can call right now" he says, keeping the elevator open for one last question

❥ "go to work, jihoon!" you say, both of you chuckling as you both wave goodbye

dokyeom:

❥ feels like the worst boyfriend ever to not have known, as if by dating a telepathic connection would automatically be formed between the two of you

❥ doesn't even complain about how you didn't tell him in the first place

❥ somehow he finds out through your best friend, who sent him a text asking if they could drop off your medicine at hybe since they were supposed to stop by your place but then couldn't

❥ (your friend knew you didn't want to worry him amidst his approaching comeback, but they had an emergency)

❥ when you open your door, you're very surprised to not only see your boyfriend, but to see your boyfriend on his knees, holding the bag of medicine

❥ "baby i'm so sorry" he looks so genuine in his apology too HELP

❥ "for what- wait, get up first" you stutter, helping him back to his feet

❥ "you're sick! i should've been taking care of you" he says with a pout, holding onto your forearms

❥ "but you have your comeback to worry about-" you try but he's already shaking his head, he checks your temperature by placing the back of his hand on your forehead before cupping your cheek

❥ "we're perfectly on schedule for that, i could've taken care of you regardless. c'mon baby, let me make it up to you" (when he literally has nothing to make up for)

❥ will baby you and there's no stopping it until you're fully back to regular health

❥ almost insists on feeding you, keeps track of when you should take your medicine, and also routinely checks if you're staying hydrated

❥ even when he has to leave your apartment (which you have to convince him that you can survive on your own) he checks up on you through texts

mingyu:

❥ appalled that you didn't tell him as soon as you were starting to feel under the weather

❥ he discovers that you're sick when he calls you and you try to answer, only to start coughing. the smile that he always has when he calls you is soon wiped away

❥ "you're not feeling good? since when, baby?"

❥ "uh, i don't know 'gyu, maybe monday?" it was thursday, so you've been feeling sick for a couple days now?? it's definitely news to him

❥ "i'm gonna make you something to feel better," he promises, telling you that he'll be over soon before you could protest

❥ when he arrives you see that he has a bag of groceries in one hand and he's automatically moving towards your kitchen

❥ "'gyu you really didn't have to," you say trailing behind him, "besides, what if you get sick? then you can't practice and perform..."

❥ "company? hybe, who?" he asks, and for a moment you almost believe the fake confused look he's giving you (they're really getting better with acting on that don't lie series)

❥ "i only have one job right now" he deadpans, "and it's to feed you well today"

❥ you sit in the kitchen as you watch him work, resting your head on your table because it feels too heavy to lift it

❥ mingyu occasionally glances towards you too, heart aching over your lack of usual energy

❥ when he finishes cooking, he scoops out your portion and lightly garnishes it before setting your bowl down in front of you (you managed to lift your head for this)

❥ frankly, the entire kitchen was starting to smell good, but the bowl being directly on front of you smelled even better

❥ "thank you for this, i love you, you know," you say before scooping some of the hot soup and blowing on your spoon to cool it

❥ he doesn't even serve himself yet, he just watches you as you take your first bite, smiling when you excitedly prepare your second, then your third

❥ "this is really good 'gyu"

❥ he smiles even wider, "yeah?"

❥ "i love it, and you" you repeat

❥ "i love you too," he says, "and i'll always make you something so you can feel better"

minghao:

❥ i think by the time he finds out he's giving you a scolding while simultaneously walking around your house and adjusting things better for you

❥ he makes you sit down and rest your head back as he puts a wet cloth on your forehead

❥ "you, sit. the sick person shouldn't argue" he tells you, but not without running a hand down the side of your head

❥ you close your eyes for a moment, hearing minghao things shuffle around. you wonder what he's up to but you actually end up falling asleep

❥ when you wake up, the wet cloth is gone from your forehead and the living room seems a little neater. then when you walk around, you see that he's already gone out and bought some medicine and organized them on your table

❥ on your fridge there's a note that says what medicine you should take when, a reminder to drink water, and a reminder to call him if you need anything

❥ he's coming out of your room when you see him, "oh you're up? i just made your bed" (in fact, he tidied your entire room)

❥ "do you want to have a bath?" he asks, and if you do, he WILL wash your hair for you and give you one of the most soothing massages. you can literally just sit in the tub and not have to lift a finger

❥ will pat you down with your towel and get you into new pajamas (that he threw into the drier right before so they're extra toasty)

❥ detangles and blow dries your hair after, and this whole pampering session does somewhat lift how you feel

❥ makes you eat some dinner, but not too much so your stomach can handle it

❥ "thank you for all of this, hao" you tell him as you sip your soup

❥ "you don't have to thank me, it's my job to make you feel better" he tells you, "you don't ever have to hide not feeling well from me, okay?"

❥ will indeed tuck you into bed that day before he leaves too

seungkwan:

❥ unfortunately he's on tour when you get sick, so you really don't want to add to his stress

❥ but your boo is the kind that gets fussy even when you get a papercut

❥ he's the kind to insist on being the person to wrap your finger up with a bandaid

❥ so when he hears your groggy voice on your daily phone call it immediately catches his attention

❥ "somethings up" he concurs

❥ "what's up?" you ask

❥ "you're voice" he notes, "it's different than usual"

❥ "no it's not" you say, attempting to sound as normal as possible with your throat so scratchy

❥ "y/n, are you sick?"

❥ "no this is just my voice"

❥ a deep sigh. "you should really tell me when you're not feeling well..." and the lecture on why you need to keep yourself healthy ensues

❥ really, within this lecture you can tell he isn't mad, as his voice is really laced with concern and you have to tell him multiple times that it's just a cold and no he should not abandon the rest of his tour

❥ on top of the lecture, he asks you about your symptoms like he's a doctor while also making you promise to go see a doctor the next day (with a virtual pinky promise)

❥ he's still a bit pouty as you end your call but of course he still tells you, "you know i'm not actually mad and that i love you but i will be if you get sick again and don't tell me when i'm actually around" >:(

vernon:

❥ i feel like i write vernon as a confused person a lot but here it is again, he's confused

❥ why would you not tell him?

❥ obviously, he's also concerned when he comes over and you're coughing like crazy

❥ he's rubbing up and down your back as he asks, "why wouldn't you tell me about this?"

❥ "didn't want you to worry about something small"

❥ "well clearly, this is not something small" he says somewhat matter-of-factly, and after a moment he asks "are we not dating?"

❥ he's speaking so casually and without a single trace of annoyance

❥ "of course we're dating"

❥ "then you tell me," he says softly, "it's part of my boyfriend duties. it's like one of the immediate ones"

❥ this made you giggle, "you're disappointed you couldn't fulfill your boyfriend duties?"

❥ he scoffs but softens when you cough again, "well, yeah"

dino:

❥ "how could you not tell me! y/n" he exclaims when he comes over and sees your coffee table scattered with tissues and with you wrapped up in your duvet like a cocoon

❥ "didn't want to worry you, you have that comeback soon, right?"

❥ "that doesn't matter!" he partially whines, "not when you're home like this!"

❥ "i can't dance when i know my baby is sick!" he continues, dropping his body weight on the couch next to you

❥ "i'm fine i can handle myself-" you try with a voice already muffled by your runny nose, only to be interrupted by your own body needing to sneeze

❥ "but you're not fine! that sneeze made your whole house shake!"

❥ "chan you're making my head hurt more with your dramatic ass!" you whined, wincing at the volume of your own voice too

❥ this makes him calm down lmao, reaching over to you wrapped like a burrito to pull you close, "okay okay, i'll stop yelling, i'm sorry" he chuckles, "but can you promise to let me know next time so i can take care of you? please?"

❥ you rolled your eyes jokingly, but agreed

[inconveniently-discorporated]

I saw the Barbie movie.

One thing I did not expect was to have Feelings about what it is like to be a neurodivergent woman.

This wasn't even really addressed in the movie directly at all (aside I guess from having "weird Barbie" who lives separately from everyone else and takes in the "broken Barbies", and all of the super-positive and "uplifting" Barbies who were supportive of each other were OPENLY rejecting her because of things that were beyond her control and didn't even make her harmful to their society, just not entirely Like Them...)(okay I guess I lied, I guess they did address it and it didn't really click for me until now). (I'm still leaving that sentence in because I'm so shocked at how the point of this post is how minimized I have felt as a woman, TO THE POINT I APPEAR TO HAVE MINIMIZED THE WOMAN I CAN ENTIRELY EMPATHIZE WITH.)

Anyway. It was made EXTREMELY clear by my peers from literally day one that I was Different. I mean, I'd had one-off interactions with kids before kindergarten, but going to school was the first time I was seeing the same group of children every day.

I remember being utterly baffled. Many kids seemed to understand what to do already. Most kids were friends with someone by the end of the first day. One of my most vivid memories was from the first day almost 30 years ago, when I turned to one of the girls -- her name was Sofia, she had waist-length black hair, and her name card was a laminated piece of letter practice paper. I asked her, "How does everyone know this already?"

Her answer was that she went to preschool, and for the longest time I thought that was it. I thought that was the only reason why I didn't Get It, and never Got It from then until I graduated and from then until after I got and quit my first job and moved onto my second job (where there happens to be A LOT of neurodivergent people and I seem to get it a lot better now). It didn't occur to me that there were other kids who admittedly didn't go to preschool, who didn't have the same problem as me, and other kids who did go to preschool (because believe me, I was asking) who DID have the same problem as me (and looking back I remember at least one point where the teacher had to address the class about bullying people who were "different").

Moving from childhood into adolescence, it was made EXCEEDINGLY clear to me that I wasn't simply a Different Person, but moreso a Different Woman. It was made apparent that I was NOT an object of desire, and I did NOT deserve to think of myself as such in any way, shape, or form.

I didn't simply ignore makeup because it was expensive, and a little confusing, and somewhat of a sensory difficulty. I ignored it because I didn't think it was for me. I wasn't allowed to be one of those girls. I didn't only ignore fashion because clothes shopping was overwhelming and I couldn't spend that kind of energy in the morning putting together an outfit (not that I had a cohesive closet anyway). I ignored it because of the giggles I heard behind my back when I DID try to camouflage as A Normal Girl, because of the comments like, "Look at her wearing that belt like she thinks she's cute."

It affected me so much that I frankly didn't see myself as a "real woman" until I was in my (LATE) twenties. It's not that I didn't want to be a woman, it's that I didn't think I was allowed to feel like one. I was absolutely convinced that my husband would someday discover this "secret" about me -- that I wasn't a "real woman" -- and leave me. I literally thought he was lying to me about being attracted to me.

This did eventually change with work on my self-esteem, but one of the results is something that still persists to this day -- I feel simultaneously constrained by the societal views of women, while being almost entirely unable to relate. I went into that movie and left, today, realizing that I STILL feel like I'm Not Allowed to feel like I have some of these problems.

I've never been cat-called (though I have been screamed at by people on the street for not being desirable enough of a woman in public). But I HAVE been dismissed as an overdramatic woman by medical professionals, when my husband wouldn't get the same treatment. I've never been harassed for my number, but I HAVE had men harass and belittle me at the mechanic for saying "no" to them, who then promptly stopped the moment my husband walked into the shop and came up beside me. I've never been told I'm too pretty to be smart, but I HAVE had men refuse to talk to me and seek out my less-experienced male coworkers for answers instead.

So I drove away realizing that this dichotomy still exists for me. I couldn't relate to Barbie crying because she didn't feel pretty enough, because I've never felt like that pressure actually applied to me -- it was just always made apparent by my childhood peers that I wasn't, and didn't deserve to even worry about whether I was attractive enough. And I realized that these other pressures were the same way -- I didn't feel the pressure to be the perfect leader, because of course I couldn't be that. I didn't feel the pressure to fit in perfectly, because of course I just already couldn't.

I want to do extraordinary things, not because people expect that of me as a woman, but because people think I CAN'T as someone who is Different and Not Like Them. People are SHOCKED when I eventually adapt to a social situation (like a new job), and show that I can contribute at the same level as other people once I learn what I'm doing.

Kind of like how the Kens didn't even bother with Weird Barbie, she was just forgotten in her weird house, and she ended up being the one to help them all. And then at the end, when the Barbies realize what they've done to her, they apologize and she just sort of goes, "Eh, that's how it is."

I don't know. It's just a very weird place to be. And it can all probably be summed up by the fact that I didn't even register her experience as something I could entirely relate to, until I went to write this post about the experience that I entirely relate to.

[generalpalacefishgoop]

Demon lore w/ Tina, Mouse and Em

TinaKitten twitch VOD ID : 2052327269 (QSMP!! IS!! BACK!!! QSMP 2024!!! 03-Feb-2024)

(pls let me know if I've missed anything else)

Em tells Tina how she lost her first life, Tina comforts her, vowing to kill them all, but seems appalled (or shocked?) that Em wants to become a demon as well. She tries to talk her out of it but the server crashed lmao.

Tina :"Mom will kill all of them, don't worry. Every single one of them, ok? Mom will paint the walls red, don't worry."

Em :"thats why i wanna be a demon then i can live with you forever"

Tina : *shocked* "...ooohh...uhh...I've always wanted to not be, but I've never thought about it that way. Immortality is lonely you know, it's lonely, it's not...bad...but you know they say demons have to, you know, usually um, terrible things had to have happened for them to become- what the fuck"

(end of clip)

++

Shortly after, they met up with Mouse.

Tina, Mouse, and Em discovers a Nether portal. Mouse goes in. Tina looks back at Em.

Em :*shakes head*

Tina :"Ok, you’re right. That’s a bad idea. I’m not ready to got home anyways. Let’s go, let’s go over yonder. Um-"

Em :*hits Tina*

Tina :"Woah! God, you pack a punch, little one. Gee-whiz."

Em :"what do you mean home? :O"

Tina :"Um…I mean you know…*wink wink*"

Em :"wait eomma don’t tell me o-o"

Tina :"Ok, I won’t."

Em :*fall into pieces*

Tina :"Was that reverse psychology? What was that? That’s never worked on me, never."

Em :"are you like mami mouse? :O"

Tina :"Um in some ways..only-only a little but-but not exactly in the way that she is. She’s a bit more proud, you know? She’s a bit more proud."

Em :"oh are you not happy to be a demon? :("

Tina :"Of course not honey, most of them aren’t…well….…if they are aware…then-then maybe um they wouldn’t be. A lot of them are blissfully ignorant, you know? They like their ways."

Em :"do you think its bad to be one?"

Tina :"Mm, that’s a good question…"

Mouse comes back (she ended up at spawn, nether is currently disabled)

Tina :"Do you think it’s bad to be a demon?"

Mouse :"Of course not."

Tina :"See? Some of them are very proud."

Mouse :"Wait, why are you asking Empanada? Did you-"

Tina :"She just asked me if-if demons are proud to be them, then I said, sometimes they are"

Mouse :"Of course! I’m super proud to be a demon!"

Tina :"Yeah!"

Em :"but what is YOUR opinion"

Tina :"Um *ahem* well, if ,you know, if-if I were to be within that branch, within that family tree, I would not be proud, because they’re evil incarnate, you see? They’re bad."

Mouse :"We’re not evil incarnate! What are you talking about?"

Tina :”Oh….you don’t think so?”

Mouse :”There’s a difference between being turned into a demon and being born as a demon. If you’re turned into a demon, you’re evil! If you’re born a demon, you’re not evil at all! It’s just who you are!”

Tina :”Oh well….ok well….doesn’t that just solve a lot of our questions…"

Mouse :"Damn right it does."

Em :"oh so oh"

Tina :*mm-hm* *mm-hm* "We nod, we nod and press on, and we don’t-we don’t-we don’t-we don’t go around talking about it, you know?"

Mouse :"You should be proud of who you are."

Tina :"I’m just Tina."

Em :"i’m confused :("

Tina :"It’s ok, it’s not for us to solve today. Today, all we have to do is build a house, you know?"

Same day, a few hours after...Bad and Dapper also did some demon lore but it was less...heavy? lol it was silly....one about demon blood and.....giving birth...

[frost-link]

can I ask for a Sidon x reader where the reader is from our world and still has a phone? Just something cute about reader teaching Sidon how a phone works and maybe Sidon comforting reader when she feels homesick

So this is the first time I've ever made a request so if it's stupid please ignore

What an interesting idea! I'd love to write this! I'll be writing in a headcanon format! This one is mainly just silly, I hope it's okay! ^^

The Power of Technology - Sidon X Reader

Sidon is immediately fascinated when you show him your weird glowing brick that looks like a sheikah slate, or how else would he put it... a Purah Pad? He knows that Link has one too. You try to explain that it is a "phone" and only you have one. Sidon just goes along with it because he has no idea how new technology works, but he'll try to understand!

He's amazed how you have everything by the power of your finger tip on such a small device. Despite not having any service or internet in their world, Sidon thinks that your phone is something out of a sci-fi child story.

When your phone dies for the first time and he learns that they need to be charged by electricity, he suggests that you leave your phone outside during a thunderstorm so it could "charge".

Once Sidon learns how to use your phone, the man immediately loves watching silly videos you had saved on your phone before you came to Hyrule. He will 100% watch the same video on loop for hours on end.

"Wow! Such wonderful art! It's like real life!" Sidon would exclaim looking in your camera roll. You would have to explain that these are "photos" not drawings. Sidon didn't believe you at first.

Oh... You poor thing... Now that Sidon has discovered the magic of the camera on your phone, he will sneak your phone and take hundreds of pictures, half of them being himself with his silly cheeky smile. You'll wake up to a message on your phone about your storage being "full", you'll know why.

You'll both scroll through your phone's camera roll together. Sidon will see ones of you back in your world and will have so many questions. Looking back on these photos will make you emotional, as much as you love Hyrule and Sidon, you do get homesick.

When you're homesick, Sidon will grab your phone out of your hand and take a silly picture of himself and change your wallpaper to himself. "Look my love! You can now look at me whenever you open your phone!" He would say with a silly grin. The photo would be taken at the worst angle, yet it would make you laugh, making you feel better.

You have a mix of different songs saved on your phone but Sidon had decided that he liked a certain band the most. In the early hours of the morning, you'll hear him softly sing to himself "Weeeee are the champions!!" Low and Behold... The band was Queen.

He 100% listens to the same song on loop, and he'll NEVER get tired of that song. "It's a catchy song! How could you NOT want to sing it?"

When you are on your phone at night, he's shocked at just how bright it is. "What is that thing even made of??"

Both of you will cuddle at night sometimes watching a movie or two. You only have a few, Sidon doesn't mind rewatching. He finds it amazing how you can record life on it and then watch it on such a tiny screen.

[starlight-bread-blog]

I Watched The First Two Episodes of Hazbin Hotel

Overall I wasn't bored. It's a fun show from the little I've seen. I have thoughts and notes I'd like to give so here's how this is gonna go:

🔵 Is for things I liked/would like to be expanded upon in the show's future.

🔴 Is for things I disliked ranging from nitpicks and just general critisisms.

Whenever something about Angel Dust's trauma I will come up, I'll mark "————" at the beginning & ending so you can avoid the topic if you'd like.

So let's dive right in!<3

🔴 I am so confused. This is narrarated by Charlie. And her goal is to redeem sinners so they can enter Heaven to save their lives. But she also knows that Heaven doesn't kill sinners to stop over-population, it's just plain evil. So, what are we doing here again?

🔴 This is the first time her relationship with her father is mentioned in the show. And it's done though a joke made by Alastor in a commercial he made. (Also, how would he know about Charlie's "daddy issues"? This isn't common knowledge as far as I know).

————

🔴 WHAT THE FUCK? I'M SORRY. WHAT THE FUCK? I hate being this negative in the beginning but WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. I don't want to discuss this line any more than the shock I felt while hearing it. Next.

————

🔴 Everyone already talked about how the camera work is crap and I agree. But here's an idea: If they wanted to make something grandiose, why not make a classic musical number that's completely unrealistic, and then make the reality of Hell clash with it?

🔴 This scene could be cut off mostly entirely. The point here is to show how awful Adam is, and the second the talking's over, we get a better song that does just that.

��� At first I was gonna make this a critisism, but all it did was making me ask questions, which is good in a first episode. This has me wondering about the characterization of Heaven and how it came to be. I can accept them being a shitty bureaucracy who only appear good, but this is some Saturday Morning Cartoon villian stuff. I'm very curious about this.

🔵 Niffty couldn't say her lines and just stared at the camera and was completely unaware of the fact that she did a shitty job. How come? I wonder what they'll do with it.

🔴 This is edited. The scene didn't go like this. We cut from the hotel to the Vees before we see Alastor's counter-attack. They cut to a really long section of the episode, in the middle of something that could be dealt with in a second. I wasn't as invested as I could have been in the introduction of the Vees, because I kept waiting to come back to Alastor.

🔵 I'd like to know why Charlie is so naive. Optimistic? Yeah, makes sense. But naive? Now that's interesting to know. She clearly goes outside and sees how sinners aren't the safest people (ie Happy Day in Hell), so you think that spending eternity with them would get her acquainted with the culture and make her adjust her behaviors. But she's still looking at the guy who just tried to kill her and goes "Oh, hello again". I'm dying to know why she's like that.

————

🔵 I see where this is going<3 Despite it all, Angel Dust clearly still loves acting. So when he'll escape Val, he'll show his theatrical side by improvising and acting for Charlie<3

🔵 Despite Angel Dust not adoring the hotel, it's very much a safe place for him. A safe the Vees, from Valentino. Now, someone who worked for them just a second before getting discovered, is in. Can't wait to see more of this.

————

🔵 I liked the rivalry of Alastor and Vox. I liked how Vox is this perfect big shot, yet crumbles about Alastor when he's barely trying. Definitely a highlight.

To Summarize...

🔴 6 negatives 🔵 6 positives

I enjoyed myself a fair bit. Most of the negatives are either nitpicks or won't matter in five eps. It had some flaws but it's a start.

[saintsenara]

Not from the ask list but the characters in ur fics as Irish counties and why?

anon, this has absolutely sent me. i have genuinely never seen something more up my alley.

let's start with characters we can pull from the series for ireland's six superior counties, shall we...

antrim = oliver wood

a county full of lads who've never met a spivvy tracksuit they don't think is the height of fashion, and who have a vastly inflated sense of their success at sports.

armagh = tom riddle

armagh has a [deservedly] bloody reputation. he could settle down in the murder triangle. he'd like that.

down = draco malfoy

people who live in co. down really like thinking they're better than the rest of us just because it's easy for them to get to belfast [lads, how's that something to boast about?], so they have to be the series' whiniest flop.

fermanagh = rubeus hagrid

fermanagh is full of docile lads who build things, in my experience.

londonderry = ron weasley

canonically gorgeous, gorgeous girlies live in this fine county - by which i mean, of course, that i do. we deserve to be represented by the series' most gorgeous girly. and a ginger sweetheart with six siblings [so you know which side of the sectarian divide his parents are on...] would go down a storm with our mams.

tyrone = harry potter

my brother once had his nose broken in a pub in strabane, which doesn't sound particularly interesting until you realise that my brother is a priest. by which i mean - a county filled with people who are reckless, quick-tempered, and always ready to throw hands? it can only be represented by one man...

---

and then the rest...

carlow = quirinus quirrell

the most interesting thing there is a big rock.

cavan = percy weasley

everyone i've ever met from cavan has been really boring and really tight. so there's that.

clare = ginny weasley

because it's gorgeous, in a not like other girls way.

cork = albus dumbledore

look at this canon line and tell me dumbledore's not a cork man... "In fact, being — forgive me — rather cleverer than most men, my mistakes tend to be correspondingly huger.” 

donegal = sybill trelawney

always away with the fairies up there... and always drunk too.

dublin = walburga black

everyone you've ever met who lives in dublin is genuinely shocked to discover that the rest of the world exists beyond the m50. it's not not giving "has never set foot in muggle london and would die before she did".

galway = arthur and molly weasley

galway is the home of the nation's sophisticated [and, apparently, sexually adventurous] culchies - which fits two people from clearly quite distinguished backgrounds who nonetheless live the way they do...

kerry = gilderoy lockhart

you will never see american tourists get scammed more glamorously than in kerry.

kildare = regulus black

considerably less interesting than - and devoid of identity in comparison to - its neighbour, dublin.

kilkenny = charlie weasley

all they do is have red hair and hurl.

laois = daphne greengrass

on account of her irrelevance.

leitrim = sally-ann perks

on account of her irrelevance.

limerick = bellatrix lestrange

limerick used to be known as "stab city". she'd fit right in.

longford = mungundus fletcher

gombeen men abound.

louth = myrtle warren

because they [by which i mean the two people i know who were born there...] are always fucking moaning.

mayo = remus lupin

perpetually mopey, unless they reckon they're great at something.

meath = cormac mclaggen

they wish they were as class as the lads in dublin.

monaghan = cuthbert binns

genuinely couldn't locate it on a map.

offaly = grawp

i mean, who fucking knows? the entire place is a bog.

roscommon = aberforth dumbledore

you can guess why...

sligo = fred and george weasley

wheeler dealers, the lot of them.

tipperary = fleur delacour

the home of gorgeous, gorgeous girlies with striking accents.

waterford = dobby

they love a good strike.

westmeath = hermione granger

not somewhere you'd expect you'd choose to live if you were a bit of a know-it-all. and yet.

wexford = neville longbottom

they love to bang on about the soil.

wicklow = marge dursley

she drives a range rover and looks down on anyone who farms, change my mind.

[other answers from this ask game]

[messedupfan]

I'm With You | 11

Summary: Wanda wants to be a friend to Y/n when she needs it the most but feels as though she can't. Pietro steps in and offers Y/n advice. Y/n makes some tough decisions.

A/N: Hello!! I don't have much to say other than I hope y'all are happy and healthy. Enjoy!

Masterlist | All Chapters | Taglist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sitting in her room, Y/n feels the familiar pain that came with loving Natasha. Was this feeling worth fighting for? She asks herself. She thought she was fighting for the woman that saved her. The woman that didn't leave her side as she waited for her to wake up. Only for her to be someone she doesn't recognize. 

Wanda had overheard the argument as she was walking out of a training session. She waited outside Y/n's room. Not quite sure how she wanted to approach her. She didn't want it to confuse the girl anymore than she was. But she wanted to be a friend for her. She didn't want her to think she was being there for ulterior motives. Her brother spots her outside the girls room and steps quietly closer to her. 

“What’s happening?” He whispers, startling his sister. 

Wanda smacks his chest. “Don’t do that!” she scolds. He laughs quietly as he asks the question. “She needs a friend.” She looks at the door with her worry. 

“So… go in there,” he says as if it's that simple. 

“I can't,” Wanda replies. 

“Why not? You are her friend. Go be her friend,” he directs.

“It’s a little more complicated than that,” she retorts. 

“How so?” Pietro presses. 

Not wanting to discuss her feelings at the moment, Wanda evades the question. “It just is, okay?”

Pietro shakes his head. “I’ll go in there, you tell me what you want to say.” Wanda scowls as she asks how she is supposed to do that and he taps his head as if it's obvious before knocking on Y/n's door. Ignoring her plea to be left alone, Pietro walks right in. “Hey, I uh, wasn't eavesdropping but, I heard things going south with you and Natasha. Thought you might need someone to talk to.” He says every word that Wanda sends to his mind. Then the girl tries to connect to his ears. To hear what he is hearing. 

“Thank you Pietro, but it's okay. You don't want to hear about my problems. Especially when some of them involve your sister,” she wipes her tears. 

“What about my sister has you shedding tears?” he asks protectively. “I am older than her by ten minutes, you know. Just say the word and I'll make sure-”

Y/n laughs through her tears, “It’s nothing like that. But thank you Pietro.”

“Then what's the matter?” He presses. Wanda fills him in on what happened as he waits for the girl's response.

Y/n looks at the man and sighs, “You’re not going to leave me alone are you?”

Pietro shakes his head. “Nope! You're stuck with me until I've helped.”

“I see why Wanda is happy to finally have her own space,” she teases as she continues to mull over the idea of opening up to him. 

Pietro laughs, “She’ll never have her own space. Not until I'm dead. No,” he thinks about it for a second. “I take that back. I will haunt her so she never knows peace,” he concludes proudly. Wanda rolls her eyes but smiles when she hears Y/n’s laughter. Her brother is many things and to many people. Very few knew about the kindness in his heart, she’s glad to know that he trusts Y/n enough to show that side of him. 

“Okay,” Y/n takes a breath. “I found out that while I was hurting over Natasha she was getting pleasured by a friend of hers. Then when she was claiming to be searching for me every second of every day while I was being tortured by Hydra, she was still finding time to sleep with that friend. Now,” she sighs at a loss. “I don’t know if I can forgive her for not being committed to me the same way I’ve been committed to her.” 

Pietro nods, “I see,” he stalls a bit as he waits for Wanda’s advice but she has gone silent as she feels Y/n’s pain. She is shocked by the feeling. She wasn’t an empath as far as she knew. They only ever discovered telepathic abilities from her. Maybe it was the bond she had created with Y/n over that time. Maybe there was something more to it or nothing at all. She didn’t have time to figure it out now. Right now, she needs to focus on helping you feel better. “Can I ask, why is it difficult to forgive your girlfriend for her infidelity during your time in captivity, but it was easy to forgive my sister for participating in the torment you faced from Hydra?” 

“She told you I forgave her, huh?” He confirms and Y/n considers her response. Why was one thing easier to forgive than the other? “Because Nat knows how I feel about her and loyalty and monogamy. Whereas Wanda wasn’t directly harming me when we were in Hydra. Besides, though you guys were technically part of that organization, you were just as much a prisoner as I was. She was doing what she had to do in order to survive. Nat was being selfish.”

Pietro nods, letting the information digest himself and worries less about what Wanda has to say. “Why is my sister part of your problems?” He asks on his own. 

“This is kind of awkward to admit because I was just talking about being cheated on and the intense betrayal that I feel from that. But, I have strong confusing feelings towards Wanda. We connect in ways that Nat and I never have before. There are moments between her and I where we’re just talking and that are, I don’t mean to gross you out here but, they are full of more intimacy than anytime I’ve had sex with Nat… ever.”

Pietro wears a soft smile as he sees only positives for his sister's future. There were buddies in the past that talked about his sister like she was an object. They would try to get him to connect them to her by saying how they’re meant to be because she is hot and they would have attractive children together. Whereas Y/n was describing that this close friendship she developed with Wanda over the months is what has attracted her the most. “It’s not gross. It’s actually really sweet.” 

Wanda is touched by this admission as well but starts to feel guilty about overhearing this without your knowledge or consent. She lets Pietro know just that and he assures her that he can take it from here. Wanda walks away from the room to give them space and go to her next training session. Which unfortunately is with a very upset Natasha. 

“Here’s what I think you should do,” Pietro starts. “I think you need to end things with Natasha and focus on yourself. I don’t think your struggle is who you want to be with. Deep down, you know who. What you need to do to retrieve that answer from within yourself is to discover what you’re looking for in a partner. What you need from someone, what you’re willing to give them, how you’re willing to be treated and how you will treat them in return. The type of relationship you want. The type of challenges you need from someone who will help you grow for the better. Learning whether or not you want chaos or stability. Discovering not only what’s best for you but what will potentially be best for your partner. Whoever that may be. You need to be by yourself and figure these things out. Otherwise, no matter who you choose in the end, the relationship will be doomed from the start.” 

Y/n is speechless. She had no idea that Pietro could be so wise from the way Wanda talked about him. He was just this stubborn, overprotective, goofball to her. “Thank you,” she says as she takes his advice to heart. There was a lot that she needed to figure out. She once admitted to Wanda that part of her thing with Natasha was being trapped in this unpredictable cycle of highs and lows. She was fine with that when that’s all she thought was possible for her. But now, she was presented with the opportunity of experiencing something better and she was going to destroy it if she wasn’t careful. “You’ve given me a lot to think about. I think you’re right. I’m in no shape to be dating right now.” You agree to his assessment. 

“So, have I helped?” Pietro asks and Y/n laughs a little. 

“Yes, you can go now. I have to figure out what I’m going to tell Nat,” she sighs as she flops back onto her bed. She has so much to figure out. She had no clue how to start that conversation. She had no idea when to have that conversation. It wasn’t happening today, she wasn’t in the mood to deal with more drama today. So she asks Jarvis to pull up a calendar to help her figure out what day might work best for her. The A.I. projects a digital calendar in front of her when she is suddenly informed what day it will occur. She witnesses the scene unfold and then when it's over, the information is whipped from her memory with only the date marked on the calendar. 

Y/n leaves her room and doesn’t think about her problems again. She returns to the lab to finish the suit. Wanda surprises her with a visit and the two talk and laugh and enjoy each other’s company. She takes an interest in what Y/n is doing so the girl begins to teach her how to use the tools and which tools to use on certain parts.

Tony is in the room the entire time and he can’t help but take notice of the interaction. He wasn’t thrilled when he found out about his colleague and his daughter being in a romantic relationship together. But after everything that Y/n had been through, he wasn’t going to share his disapproval with her. If the double agent is what made her happy then so be it. But in the weeks since she has been back, he took note of the difference in interaction when it came to Wanda and Natasha. Now, he would prefer that Y/n didn’t want either of them. She deserved more than a spy and a Hydra experiment. But these seemed to be the people she attracted. He hides a smile as he remembers the kinds of people her mother had attracted and now he can’t say he is too surprised. 

Out of the two options his daughter has felt compelled to, she seemed to be the happiest and at ease the most when she was with Wanda. Tony decides then that he is going to do as much vetting on the Sokovian orphan as possible before he gives his daughter his stamp of approval. It’s what she deserves. Not someone who is sloppy enough to cheat on her in the building her father owns. He almost didn’t believe it when Jarvis informed him of the infidelity. He figured that a trained assassin would have been the best at not getting caught. 

Once the suit is done, Y/n asks Wanda if she can speak to her about something important in one of their rooms. The brunette holds her breath as she agrees and leads Y/n over to her living quarters. The two sit on the love seat in the room and are nervous with each other as the conversation has an awkward start. 

“I have decided to break things off with Nat,” Y/n blurts out. 

Wanda is shocked and doesn’t know how to proceed, “Oh, okay.”

“And I want you to know that I do have feelings for you. They are true and they are strong,” the Stark continues and Wanda reaches over to hold her hand and help her through the conversation. “But I can’t be with you until I heal myself. I made an appointment with a therapist and I’m going to start to sort out my shit from there.”

“That’s really great, Y/n. I’m happy for you.” She pulls the girl closer to hug her and they fall into each other's arms easily. 

“Thank you,” she nuzzles her face into Wanda’s shoulder before she pulls away. “I just wanted you to know that I do feel that way about you. However, I don’t want you to feel like you have to wait for me. If someone comes along that is ready to love you and give you everything you could ever desire, let them in. Okay? I don’t want to hold you back if we’re not meant to be. And-”

“Y/n!” Wanda calls out for the third time to get you to stop talking. “Hey, let’s not think that far ahead, okay? I can’t make you do anything but I do ask that you take this journey one day at a time. Don’t think about me, don’t think about Natasha, just focus on you. Okay?”

Y/n nods as she feels tears well up in her eyes, not familiar with this kind of support. “Thank you,” she repeats and Wanda giggles as she lets the girl know that the expression of gratitude is unnecessary. “Please keep this between us until I figure out how to talk to Nat.” 

“Of course, you know your secrets are always safe with me.” Wanda promises. “Now come on, we’re going to hang out in that theater room your dad won’t stop talking about.” She gets up off of the couch and holds her hand out to drag Y/n out of the room. “We can even invite my brother and Steve if you’d like.” 

“As much as I would love to be alone with you, I think that’s a really great idea,” the two leave the room to hunt down the other two so Y/n can take her mind off the rollercoaster of a day.

Chapter 12

Taglist: @chaisreading @vivs46 @thatvillain @doudouneverte

[greenerteacups]

hihi i saw you were semi-active on tumblr and figured i would ask if you'd be willing to elaborate a bit on the whole push/pull relationship theo and daphne have in lionheart? i've done a couple rereads but i still can't quite figure out how they feel about one another.

hope you're having a great christmas gt <3

i've got good news and bad news. the good news: you've read it perfectly well, because "can't figure out how they feel about one another" is exactly what's going on with them at any given moment. so this is greatly vindicating for both you as reader and myself as author. the bad news: you have just given me license to talk about theodore nott and daphne greengrass, a dynamic that gets an understandably small amount of attention and yet consumes large volumes of my headspace. so. spoilers ahead!

daphne and theo break my heart, because they're a story in wasted potential. theo and pansy are obviously old childhood friends, but i think daphne is just someone who knew them socially and only really got close to them at school — cf. her conversation with draco at the yule ball — because first year forced theo to make friends who weren't pansy for the first time, and daphne finally had a chance to socialize without her parents coddling her. they get along like a house on fire, pansy rocks up to join them in second year, and this is the cute little nega-Trio draco meets in book 2. it's a fashionable nucleus of dry humor and ferocious mutual protectiveness, which theo demonstrates especially in the hospital wing at the end of book 3.

but theo continues to suffer the chronic condition of Being Theodore Nott, and so when the plot comes knocking, things go south for him expeditiously, especially his personal relationships. daphne develops a crush on him as early as book 3, and being daphne, she's incredibly obvious about it, but being (1) a teenage boy and also (2) an incipient domestic terrorist, he naturally avoids dwelling on it — and then maybe-kind-of-starts-to-reciprocate, because hey huh wait a second you sure do care about this girl a lot, don't you, theodore? — but by that point the war's started revving up in the background and he has Other Shit To Deal With.

it doesn't help that the two of them are being drawn in radically different political directions, partly because of her friendship with draco, but also because of her own choices. theo's mistake here isn't malicious, but he really does ice daphne out (as he does everyone but pansy, pretty much, in fairness) for most of book 4, and by the time he realizes that he could actually lose her, it's too late. probably he doesn't realize how far she's migrating once she drifts out of his influence — daphne is incredibly susceptible to suggestion and is deeply influenced by those around her, which becomes clear once she's transplanted into gryffindor and discovers this much kinder, more chivalrous side of her nature. given that chameleon-quality of hers, it's understandable for theo to be shocked when she pivots away from him and pansy the space of less than a year. but also, I think it's telling that he's that surprised, since daphne hasn't been in good with the rest of slytherin for months at this point. and in turn, this surprise angers her, because like — dude, seriously? forget the romantic stuff; you're supposed to be her best friend, and you couldn't tell that she was doing a Character Arc behind your back? (strains of this feeling heavily inform what she says to draco during the Yule Ball, especially re: theo and pansy being each other's platonic soulmates. she feels locked out, in every sense: from slytherin, from her friends, from her parents, from everything. she wants in on something, and it drives her to do something pretty callous to draco and hermione, as she realizes and regrets. daphne is not always a kind person, even when she's a nice one.)

that anger, and theo's unfortunate failure to do anything useful about it whatsoever — slytherins! purebloods! low EQ! not great at the whole making-amends thing! — is what makes it possible for her to sever ties with slytherin completely, effectively terminating the close friendship she had with him and pansy (who's slightly less reconciled to that separation, but pansy is also much less politically involved than theo both philosophically and functionally, so it's easier for her to double-dip). it's my headcanon that if theo had even 15% less to worry about, he'd be making more of an effort to revive that relationship, but kid is in hardcore Survival Mode for most of book 4, and just knowing that daphne's not in immediate physical danger has to be enough for him. meanwhile, upstairs, daphne is discovering the Life-Changing Magic of Real Friendship, and like, it's kind of a blast? and lavender and parvati are really cool? and gosh now that theo isn't the center of her living universe, isn't it funny how all these tall good-looking boys are wandering around? funny, that!!

this isn't to say that their story is finished — it isn't! there's still a lot of gas left in this tank, and many, many things these two have left to say to each other — but that's where the story leaves us. they were close; there was a real possibility of something, and likely some degree of mutual interest; but the timing was never right, and it's not going to get any easier if things keep going in the direction they are now. (but who knows?)