#i thought i stopped being a weird asshole in college

[imuybemovoko]

so I made a language

well technically i've made kind of a bunch of languages

and probably already have a very old post about one of them

but here's another one. I call it Pinõcyz. I started working on it in February of 2020.

PHONOLOGY

I don't want to get too deep into the evolution I did on this, but to illustrate a little of that, I'll explain what's going on with the vowels and /z/. Basically, in most consonants where the modern language lacks a labialized pairing, i.e. /m l q/ and others, the labialized consonant simply unrounded. Historical /ðʷ/, though, merged with /z/ instead, yielding contrasting /z zʷ/ preceding /ɛ ɵ u ɔ/ and contrasting /ɛ ɵ u ɔ/ and /e ɨ ɯ o/ following plain /z/.

I realize also that I've sort of doubled the explanation of this in the notes maybe?! and left a note about the romanization in this screenshot that I deleted the romanization from because I want to display it separately. I'm not going to replace this screenshot a fifth damn time. :D

ORTHOGRAPHY

The Pinõcyz language is written primarily with the Tewrinnal /teɣrinːal/ script. It's an abugida.

...For a language with eleven vowels and fairly complex syllables.

You know, very much not the normal simple, open syllables that such a system usually operate best with.

So just what the hell is going on here?

Well, every character has an inherent vowel /ə/. To represent other vowels, diacritics are used, and to represent, for example, a single-consonant coda, another diacritic is used to mark that there isn't a vowel. For example:

/mə me m/

There are six regular vowel diacritics:

/nɨ ni no na ne nɯ/

But, we also have to handle four more vowels somehow, and the labialized consonants where they're distinct.

That's all handled with one diacritic, marking both for labialization on the consonant and, where relevant, these different vowels.

/nʷɵ nʷi nʷo nʷɔ nʷɛ nʷu/

So that helps with those things. But what happens with a consonant cluster, or a geminate? Those are weird, right?

Well, the script uses a longer diacritic for that. Let's use the name of the script as an example:

/teɣrinːal/ (It's written from right to left.)

So, couple of things going on here. First, that second chunk is /ɣri/. The glyph for /ɣ/ doesn't need the null vowel diacritic (shown here on final /l/) because it's marked with this tie bar that shows it's part of a cluster in the same syllable as /ri/. And second, that third chunk is /nːa/. Marking geminates via this tie bar is one of several uses of this other glyph, the null-consonant.

We also have to handle initial vowels.

And diphthongs.

So what's going on here?

/ə ɨ i o a e ɯ/

Here's the null-consonant glyph, and every vowel on it. These don't take the rounding diacritic; for geminates, said diacritic will appear on the consonant glyph proper.

/qaj teu/

Diphthongs are written as though the first component forms a simple syllable with the consonant, but then with the null consonant immediately following.

Alright.

So here's all the base glyphs real fast:

/∅ m n ŋ p b t d k g q/

/t͡s d͡z t͡ʃ d͡ʒ r l j f v s z/

/ʃ ʒ x ɣ h ð ɬ/

And one last quick note, /zʷ/ is represented by the glyph for /ð/ with rounding diacritic. Here's an example, in the form of a common given name:

/zʷɛzi/

Last but not least, the script has a couple of punctuation marks:

In order, something between the role of a comma and a semicolon; a marker for the end of a sentence; and an exclamation and imperative marker. These are small and appear next to the bottom of the last glyph, much like a period or comma might.

I don't have a font of this yet, and even if I did I'd have some trouble getting that to function well on Tumblr. So I'm going to briefly explain the romanization that I tend to use.

For the non-labialized consonants I have:

/m n ŋ p b t d k g q t͡s d͡z t͡ʃ d͡ʒ f v ð s z ɬ ʃ ʒ x ɣ h r l j/

⟨m n ň p b t d k g q c ż č ǧ f v ð s z ł š ž x w h r l j⟩

For the vowels I have:

/i ɨ ɯ e ə o a/

⟨i y u e õ o a⟩

The other four vowels and the labialized consonants are handled with diacritics on the characters for the vowels. So,

/ɛ ɵ u ɔ/

⟨ê ŷ û â⟩

and to mark that the preceding consonant is labialized, i and o also take circumflex, î and ô. The result is that ⟨w⟩ represents both /w/ and /ɣ/, and ⟨j⟩ represents both /j/ and /ɥ/, and obviously, for example k, g, r represent both plain /k g r/ and labial /kʷ gʷ rʷ/, and so on.

And because this doesn't handle labialized z, I have /zʷ/ ⟨ź⟩, and for example ⟨zê⟩ /zɛ/.

This probably isn't anything close to an ideal system, but it's what I settled on in 2020 and I don't think I want to change it. It's weird, but it's phonetic, in a sort of weird roundabout way.

So let's get into the grammar.

We'll start relatively simple: word order is verb-subject-object, with descriptors that follow what they're marking except for some in the animate class that are derived from verbs (more on all that later), and placement of other things like indirect objects and relative clauses varies in a couple of ways.

Also, subject pronouns often, but are not required to, drop entirely.

NOUNS

Whether a noun is considered animate or inanimate has some impact on case markings and other things like that. In general, people, certain concepts, feelings, anything divine, weather phenomena, time, animals, some tools, injuries or illnesses, fire and water, and plants food items considered spiritually important such as tea and many herbs are animate; other nouns are inanimate. Certain shelled sea creatures are also inanimate.

Case markings carry a plural marker and information related to definiteness within them. Animate nouns are considered definite by default and so have an indefinite article that incorporates into the cases; inanimate nouns are considered indefinite by default and so incorporate a definite article into their case markings.

Pinõcyz has split-ergative alignment based on animacy. Animate nouns take the (unmarked) nominative case as subject and the accusative case as object; inanimate nouns take the ergative case as subject and the (unmarked) absolutive as object. All the case markers except the ergative appear as suffixes; the ergative, though, is a particle that precedes the noun. There's a lot of wonky historical reasons for that, a bit beyond the scope of this.

Here's a table of the regular forms:

Where I have something in parenthesis, what sounds occur at the end of a noun determine whether it's present. For the vowels (i.e. most of them), it drops if the noun has a final vowel, and for the definite singular inanimate dative, that l is present if it's a final vowel and gone if there's a final consonant. There are other effects that the final consonant can have but they're often less predictable than this.

I'll explain the ablaut more when I get to verbs since it's more relevant there, but the definite singular inanimate dative does trigger ablaut, and the inanimate singular definite genitive triggers ablaut in nouns with a final vowel, where the y is dropped.

POSSESSIVE CONSTRUCTIONS

The possessor is marked with the genitive case and precedes what it marks. Examples: Tuštez bylen "Tušte's cousin", ðandaz manõn "rapids", lit. "river's teeth"

ADJECTIVES

Here I'm using "adjectives" as a sort of catch-all term, there's not a separate class of adverbs. There are, however, separate sets of animate and inanimate descriptors. These come in the form of a few adjectives that can simply be used for either sort of noun, i.e. izy "also", or in the form of separate, often derived forms for animate nouns, i.e. ðakan rõr "the stone nearby", but šõrõr celiż "the nearby ash tree". Many animate adjectives are derived more recently from verbs, and those ones precede what they describe, unlike the others. The new verb-derived animate adjectives are still often transparently related to one of several verbs. For example, šõrõr here has incorporated šõ "to have" as a prefix; wâðrata "dry" takes wâð "to be" as a prefix, and so on.

Except for a few exceptions, animate adjectives may not be used for inanimate nouns and vice versa, i.e. šõrõr ðakan here would be ungrammatical.

ABLAUT

I'm going to take a second before I get into the rest of this to discuss ablaut in more detail.

Sometimes, but not always, an i or e vowel remains in a suffix that triggers ablaut. This was universal before some of the vowels were eroded, but is now a bit trickier to predict if the vowel has been lost. Historically (read: before vowel length was lost, a bunch of final vowels got eroded, and a bunch of other things happened), a long i or e in the final syllable triggered fronting and raising of the vowel in the preceding syllable. How that expresses in the modern language is roughly reflected by this table:

Most of the time, labialization was retained through this raising, so sê "to float" > sîż "they (inanimate, plural) float".

Some verb endings including tense markers and subject agreement trigger ablaut.

VERBS

Oh boy these get messy. Alright, I'll start with the tenses. I'll give an example sentence or two with each, and I'll explain the personal agreement after that.

Simple Present: unmarked. Deals in ongoing actions, states, things like that. Example: Symvinan "I'm thinking".

Habitual: -čin if the noun has a final consonant; -ǧin for a final vowel; in final plosives, the č metathesizes into the word like CVčCin. Triggers ablaut. Deals in actions that the subject carries out often or habitually. Examples: Łezeǧinõn manõnxaz "I often swim in the river"; Wêličkinõm dõz ðažgaňna "She often moves my pans".

Imperative: -žǧin for final vowel, -ščin basically otherwise; rarely -šõčin with final clusters. Triggers ablaut. Commands, things like that. Example: Biliqščin żŷknõ! "Prepare the boat!" (Fun note: żŷk "boat" is an animate noun; that's the accusative case.)

Future: -ðem, VðCem metathesis with final plosives. Deals in things that will take place in the future. Triggers ablaut. Examples: Bigimðemõǧ yquddiz bêdêkkuinan "They will gather the king's council"; Taxe beðqemõl "Therefore you will flee".

Conditional: -sõn if final consonant, -zõn if final vowel, VsCõn metathesis for final plosive. Deals in possibilities, uncertainties, etc. Example: Boňgestõnõn żen Lagruisyn "I might mail those to Lagrui".

Subjunctive: -õð for some final consonants, -ôð for others; -ð for final vowel; metathesizes with final stop VðõC unless it's in a cluster. Expected, preferred, "ought to be". Example: Kalyðõl "You ought to sleep".

Past-habitual: -šał with final consonants, -žał with final vowels; metathesizes VšCał with final plosives. Things the subject used to often or habitually do. Example: Kyużêžałõn ðembawynxaiz "I used to explore among these ruins often."

Optative: -kî for final consonant, -gî for final vowel. Triggers ablaut. Deals in things desired or hoped for by the speaker. Example: Erõmjeqqîl nida "I hope you return early". (In this example the consonant was absorbed into the final q on the verb root.)

Pluperfect: -łyš, metathesizes VłCyš for final plosives. Final consonant in the suffix retains labialization when vowels follow. Deals with actions completed by a specified or implied time period. Example: Dîrzynłyšôč "They (animate, plural) had taken ill". (Final consonants in the root form will have lost labialization, but they retain it when, like here, a vowel is introduced via a suffix.)

Experiential: -šai for final consonant, -žai for final vowel, VšCai for final plosive. Marks an experience that has happened at least once without respect for time, and is repeatable. Example: Sylezunčaiž wâðger waišqalnan "We have survived some large floods". (This example shows fortition of the fricative immediately after a nasal, a common sound change.

Now let's look at the regular forms of the person endings.

Most often, these will retain the vowel before the suffix consonant, but that is not always the case, sometimes you lose it and keep the one after, and it's not predictable in a way I can describe neatly here. For final vowels in the root or the TAM affix, typically no vowel is retained after.

Here's where things get WILD.

PASSIVE VOICE

The passive voice renders the agent of an action as an oblique and promotes the patient, so that it's focused a bit more. The passive is derived from an auxiliary verb that takes the tenses and the verb agreement, giving a qir- prefix. Then the verb is incorporated after that, and then -(u)z prefix, where the u drops if the z is allowed to form a final cluster with the final consonant or the verb has a final vowel. Then the agent of the action takes the ablative case. Example:

Qiršõmrenõnżõ Madriz lezgammuðgõż "Madriz was stabbed by an impostor". (This sentence is sus. Also note the fortition, z > d͡z after that nasal.)

ANTIPASSIVE

In ergative constructions, it's often more appropriate to de-emphasize the agent. In these cases, an antipassive construction forms, basically the passive construction but with the oblique-marked object in the allative case. This shows up mainly in relative clauses, but can form in fully independent sentences for emphasis reasons. Example:

Qiršymqamżõ pera Varasyn "An apple hit Vara"

An active-voice rendering of this same sentence would be Qamšym gõr pera Varanõ; the ergative particle here lends a degree of emphasis that is not always useful. Some speakers even consider it ungrammatical to form a sentence with the accusative on the object and the ergative on the subject, though that's far from universal and is mostly a hard-and-fast rule only in relatively conservative dialects. (For the most part, variation among dialects is beyond the scope of this post.)

MEDIOPASSIVE

The mediopassive construction handles both reflexives and certain intransitive sentences where the subject is not necessarily interpreted as the agent, such as "I fell". It derives from an old auxiliary verb ša- which takes any tenses and the subject agreement, but in this case the main verb, marked with the experiential, is not fused to the end of that. Examples:

Šan kadynčai "I fall" (fortition after the nasal again); Šamom dewšai "He has washed himself".

CAUSATIVES AND INDIRECT OBJECTS

A causative will usually take the form of the cause oblique-marked, taking the ablative case; an indirect object is typically marked with the dative case unless circumstances suggest something else. Typically, an animate oblique will precede the verb and an inanimate will follow the entire clause, but this is somewhat flexible for the purposes of emphasis. Examples: Taraðõd sybêkužõn Jŷddenõ "I met Jŷdde because of Tara" (causative); Kitronyz šŷllalõ leðõn żŷknõ "I'm building a boat for Kitron's clan" (indirect object).

NEGATION

Negating nouns and adjectives is done with a suffix -riq; this does not trigger ablaut. Example: cymanõnriq "nonexistence, void". In nouns this is primarily a derivational method.

In verbs, there is a negative auxiliary, jan in root form. It takes personal agreement, preceding the main verb, and the main verb takes tenses. Here's the forms of the negative auxiliary:

In passives, antipassives, and mediopassives, the negative auxiliary takes root form and precedes the verb construction as a particle.

Examples:

Jan šan kadynčai "I did not fall"; Ne vreita grõn teta "The candle isn't burning".

QUESTIONS

The interrogative terms are:

qa "who"; hud "what"; jõl "where"; tõr "when"; wal "why"; ðam "how"; gy "which one", also a general interrogative; jezyn "to where"; jeðõd "from where". They usually precede the verb, with the exception of gy when it precedes a noun, i.e. Jenin gy tynnanõ? "Which sumac tree am I looking for?"

RELATIVE CLAUSES

The interrogative terms also function as relative pronouns.

If the noun of the relative clause is animate:

Subjects, direct objects, and indirect objects can be relativized without any extra trouble, simply constructing the clause out of an interrogative and then the verb and relevant noun. Examples:

Subject- Kasran kêdynõ qa bašqõm "I see the dog who ran"

Object- Gy bûriðemõl ňaňlõ qa ðõkasran? "Will you wait for the man who I forgot?"

Indirect object- Wâðõm pinõ qa daxõn luz qarut "That is the person who I gave your money to"

For obliques, genitives, and objects of comparatives, it's necessary to use a passive. Examples:

Oblique- Jenižǧin sadynõ jeðõd qirmomrenõnżõ Nabi lezgammuðgõż! "Find the knife with which Nabi was stabbed by an impostor!"

Genitive- Gy činõl riżalnõ qaz qirõmjeniz rênnan Dargoðõd? "Do you know the shrub whose leaves are sought by Dargo?"

Object of comparative- Dalqamõn ainan jeðõd šoðõð qirčinõnfilz "I playfully hit the nonbinary person who I am sung better than by"

Yeah, Pinõcyz has a word for the act of hitting someone gently in a humorous or flirty way, it's dalqam.

If the noun of the relative clause is inanimate:

Only absolutives may be relativized. Example:

Absolutive- Qiršõngaduz wegrizxaiz jõl kerkożżynčõm verraw "I was given birth to in the city which the king declared war against".

For all other sorts of relative clauses, antipassives must be used. Examples:

Ergative- Vreitašõn ludan hud qiršõmfaisqõ Balzasyn "I burned the arrow that killed Balza" (that -z suffix here is metathesized into the verb and devoiced, and we have a following epenthetic vowel)

Indirect object- Kasran eigu jezyn qirčinõmdaxuz xâż lenasyn "I see the clearing to which the tide gives water"

Oblique- Laxõždõn ðaka jeðõd qiršõmmaxnaz ewa "I broke the stone with which the shellfish hunted"

Genitive- Šommom qâra huż qiršymžac mez rênnażi "The basil that lost its leaves has died."

Object of comparative- Jenimon reňkum hud qirčinõnjanjaz han dõsyn "I have found the needle that is longer than me" (lit. "grows more than me")

A FEW TRANSLATIONS

I feel like translating some stuff, just to show a bit of the feel of it with either some familiar texts or maybe some stuff I decide to write for this. Again, no font, so I'll have to rely on my weird handwriting for this.

The One Ring inscription:

Verreðym gi grõn uda że cy, jeniðym gi że;

[verːeðɨm gi grən ɯda d͡ze t͡sɨ | jeniðɨm gi d͡ze]

rule-SUBJ-3S.Inan one ERG.DEF ring 3P.Inan all | find-SUBJ-3S.Inan one.DEF 3P.Inan

"One ring shall rule them all, the one shall find them;

Bêlašõðym gi grõn uda że cy, ta heqalxaz gŷšqamõðym że

[bɛlaʃəðɨm gi grən ɯda d͡ze t͡sɨ | ta heqalxaz gʷɵʃqaməðɨm d͡ze]

gather-SUBJ-3S.Inan one ERG.DEF ring 3P.INAN all and evil-LOC imprison-SUBJ-3S.Inan 3P.Inan

"One ring shall gather them all, and shall imprison them in evil"

Mordor jejaxtaz jõl xalzunõǧ tawna

[mordor jejaxtaz jəl xalzɯnəd͡ʒ taɣna]

Mordor territory-LOC where reside.3P.Anim shadow-P.DEF

"In Mordor land where the shadows live."

A few quotes from Goncharov and its promotional materials:

Jaqym grõn rêǧi Napolisyn

[jaqɨm grən rʷɛd͡ʒi napolisɨn]

come-3S.Inan ERG.DEF winter Naples-ALL

"Winter comes to Naples"

Ai fiłatõš syganõn; so, fiłacõnõn uri lun ðam qirčinymfiłac yaň sadusyn

[aj fiɬatəʃ sɨganən | so fiɬat͡sənən ɯri lɯn ðam qirt͡ʃinɨmfiɬat͡s jaŋ sadɯsɨn]

O lover apologize-1S | look love-COND-1S only 2S.ACC REL.how ANTP-HAB-3S.INAN-love\ANTP boot knife-ALL

“I’m sorry my dear, I can only love you the way a boot loves a knife.”

Kamassõnõl mainõ Napoliðõd žaz dajersyn qarrêðdõ Mâskõvaxaz ňaňňyz qa zazõðõǧ hud fiłatõǧ lun vaðdõd

[kamasːənəl majnə napoliðəd ʒaz dajersɨn qarːʷɛðdə mɔskəvaxaz ŋaŋːɨz qa zazəðəd͡ʒ hɯd fiɬatəd͡ʒ lɯn vaðdəd]

trace-COND-2S path-ACC.DEF Naples-ABL 1P.GEN home-ALL childhood Moscow-LOC man-GEN.P REL.who say-SUBJ-3P.Anim REL.what love-3P.Anim 2S.ACC blood-ABL

“you could trace a path from Naples to our childhood house in Moscow with the blood of all the men who’ll tell you they love you”

I'll probably do art and shit with this conlang at some point, and not just LOTR and Goncharov brainrot.

Enjoy!

[leeknow-thoughts]

୨୧ POMEGRANATE

𝝑𝝔 son of Hades!Chris x mortal!fem!reader

𝝑𝝔 cw : forced marriage, coercion, kidnapping, Hades is an asshole, Chris isn't an asshole, Soft!Dom!Chris, Sub!Reader, daddy kink, dd/lg, fingering (r. rec), innocence kink, oral (r. rec), spanking, oral fixation, inexperienced! reader, d/s dynamics, age play (not super extreme), p in v, creampie (use protection!!), pussy spanking, pet names, degrading kink, praise kink, bulge kink, lmk if I missed anything!!

𝝑𝝔 hyung line Greek gods m.list | maknae line Greek gods m.list

You were always too busy to think about having boyfriends and sex and things that were normal for women of your age. You never thought it was weird how you avoided romance, even in your teenage years. You thought romance was stupid, and it would just get in the way of your goals.

You busted your ass to graduate valedictorian in college, countless sleepless nights and study sessions is what your life consisted of for four whole years.

You reminisced about your hard work every single day that you worked this stupid low level job. You worked for the largest construction company in the country, Erebus Construction Enterprises. It was owned by one of the wealthiest families in the nation, the Bahngs, the oldest son of the family being the current CEO and his father being the head chairman of the company.

"Y/n," your coworker snaps you out of your trance, "hey, there you are, the team was going to go get drinks tonight? Do you wanna join?"

"No thanks," you reject, "I have a project I have to complete."

Your coworker gives you a look of sympathy before grabbing her coat and clocking out.

You refocus on your project as the desks next to you become empty, workers clocking out, hoping to enjoy their long weekend. Not you though, you still had to finish typing up a paper for the marketing team and make a slideshow for the next accounting meeting.

Hours passed by as you kept typing on your computer. "You know work hours ended-," a voice begins, you snap your head up to look at the man who said it, you find a man in an all black uniform staring at you, he checks his watch, "- five hours ago," the man finishes.

"I'm just finishing up a paper and a slideshow for a meeting we have next Tuesday," you explain to the man.

You take a moment to stretch, leaning back in your rolling chair. "Your name is?" the man asks.

"Y/n Y/l/n," you introduce yourself.

"Ah, just wanted to be sure," the man says.

It takes you a moment to register what he said and reply with, "wait what do you mean?"

"Follow me," he instructs.

When you don't follow after him he stops in his tracks, approaches you again and gives you a stern warning, "you should do what you're told, now come," he grabs your arm.

He drags you out into the hallway and the more you try to squirm and get away from him, the tighter his grip on your hand is. He pulls you into the elevator and presses one of the red buttons on the bottom.

You watch as the sign on the elevator changes from 'elevator' to 'hellevator'. "You might want to hold onto something," the man in black warns.

"Wha-" you begin.

Suddenly you're falling, well the elevator is falling. You scream as it plummets down. You don't know where it's taking you but your stomach sinks more every second you're falling.

Suddenly the elevator halts, and you have no time to brace yourself as you hit the floor. "Don't say I didn't warn you," the man chuckles lowly.

"What the fuck!" you scream, "what the fuck is this place!?"

"It's just hell, honey," he says the answer like it's obvious.

"What?" You look at him with shock and disbelief.

The elevator dings before the doors swing open, "don't go to the basement unless you want to meet Cerberus," the man gives a final warning before grabbing your purse and pulling out a quarter, "there that covers your fine," he hands me back my bag.

"My fine?" You question.

"You just crossed the River Styx, honey, I'm the ferryman," he says it like it's obvious.

You are given no warning before he pushes you out of the elevator, you try to run back inside, but the doors close before you can. You slide against the wall and cry.

You were in hell?

But why?

Ferryman? Cerberus? Like in Greek mythology, the spirit who helps the dead cross the River Styx, and the giant three-headed dog?

Your head fell into your hands and you tried to make sense of the whole situation. A tap on your shoulder causes you to look up, "please- just let me go home!" you plead through a sob.

The woman in front of you holds out her hand for you to take, when you don't take it she grabs your hand and pulls you with her.

She pulls you into a large dining room, the table is set with a collection of magnificent foods, there are four seats, none of them are full.

All of the windows are covered with curtains and the only light source in the room comes from the many candles scattered around the room.

The woman pulls you to one of the seats, and makes you sit down on the leather surface. "Who are you? Let me go!" you try and push the woman off you.

"Tch tch tch, silly girl," a deep voice scolds, "she's dead, she can't speak."

You look to find where the voice comes from, you find the man who spoke standing in a doorway. He wore a simple back suit with perfectly polished leather shoes and a clean haircut.

"Servant," he calls to the woman holding your wrist, "go fetch Chris and Persephone."

The woman bows to the man and lets go of your wrist before leaving out the door she brought you through. "Y/n Y/l/n," he says your name.

He crosses the space from the doorway to the seat directly in front of the one you were sat in. "Who-what are you?" you stutter.

"Well you could call me the devil, but I am not nearly as evil as him," he looks at you like you should know this like it is obvious and you should've known all along, "did the Ferryman not explain to you where you were?" he asks as he takes off the black blazer, placing it on the back of his chair.

"He just said we crossed the River Styx," you recall to the man.

"I see, still-," he pauses and opens a bottle of what looks like red wine before pouring it into one of the wine glasses, "you're a very intelligent young lady, I assume you realized where you were on your own."

"Why am I here?" I ask the man.

"Well it's a really long story, it started off with my nephew, he was given a message for me by these three old hags- that are referred to as the Fates. So being the messenger God and all, my nephew- Hermes- brought their letter to me," he takes a sip of the win before he continues, "imagine my surprise when that letter tells me the name of my eldest son's fated wife, and it turns out being your name. One of the new accounting hires," he man cocks his head.

"Y-you know me?" you mutter.

He hears you clearly though, "I know of every soul to exist, yes I know of you."

"W-why is this happening?" you inquire.

The man sighs, "like I said, you're fated to marry my oldest son," he replies.

"I-I c-can't be," you choke out, trying not to sob.

"Well unfortunately for you, you are," the man says dryly.

"S-so you're the devil?" I ask.

The man smirks, "Hades actually, Satan works in Tartarus exclusively," he explains.

"Hello darling," a woman says from the doorway.

She is utterly stunning, a small frame and dark brown eyes with red rosy cheeks and plump lips. "Hello Persephone," the man-Hades-greets.

The woman walks to your seat and wraps her arms around you, "hello y/n," she says as she hugs you tenderly.

Your words are caught in the back of your throat, "P-persephone?" you somehow are able to mumble.

"That's me, dear," she breaks away from you and walks to the other side of the table, sliding into the seat next to Hades.

"Where's Chris?" Hades asks her.

"He's in one of his moods, you know he doesn't want to do this, darling," Persephone says softly.

Hades rolls his eyes and whistles, within a millisecond a large wolf with red eyes is sitting beside your chair, "go get Chris," Hades tells the ferocious looking dog.

The dog trots away, out the doorway. "Oh, y/n dear, help yourself to the food," Persephone says gently.

You look at the meal prepared on the table in front of you. "B-but I d-don't want to have to stay here like you do," you confess to the woman.

"Don't worry about that dear, besides that whole myth is just a lie, Hades didn't force me to live down here," Persephone calmly corrected.

"Yeah, but he coerced you, I read the story, you were kidnapped by him and Zeus and they brought you down here and you accidentally ate a pomegranate and now you have to stay down here for 3 months every year," you clear your throat then continue, "and those 3 months are known as winter because your mother, Demeter, won't tend to the crops, that's why they all die."

"You haven't the slightest idea of what truly happened," Persephone says firmly, "I chose to stay with Hades on my own volition, winter happens because my mother takes a break during those three months. And Hades and his brother never kidnapped me."

Your mouth falls slightly agape as you listen to her.

"Oh," you say when she finishes talking.

"Yeah," she clears her throat.

"Dad, I told you," a voice comes from the doorway, you turn to look at the man, he was handsome, with dark hair and dark eyes, "I'm not doing this," he continues.

"You don't have a choice," Hades tells him, "now, sit."

The man reluctantly takes the seat next to you, and gives you a quick glance. "Y/n you really should eat," Persephone insists, "it's very good."

"Do you promise me that if I eat I won't be stuck here for forever," you ask her.

"You won't be stuck here forever," she promises.

You hesitantly reach across the table and grab a serving of the food, putting it on your plate and taking a small bite.

The food was delicious, the best you've had in your life. "It's good isn't it?" Persephone asks.

"The best," you compliment.

"Well, Chris, aren't you going to say anything to her?" Hades asks the man next to you.

"Yeah," he sighs, "I don't want to get married."

Hades' first slams onto the table, "Chris that is enough. You know your fate, she knows hers. There is not a choice in this matter," his voice booms.

Persephone gently rubs circles on Hades' shoulder, trying to calm him. "Y/n," she begins, "once dinner is over, you and Chris will be going back to his house, it's just a short boat ride away, if you would like anything you can write to Hephaestus," she explains.

"What about my apartment? And my job?" you ask.

"This is your home now," Hades says, rubbing his temple, "you can visit Earth anytime you like, but you must come back here before dark."

A clock on the wall chimes ten times, "well it is time for you two to go," Hades instructs Chris and you.

Chris sits up and looks at you before extending his hand for you to take. He senses your caution and smiles at you, trying to make you feel more calm.

"Go with him now, y/n, or else," Hades warns.

You hesitantly take his hand and he swiftly leads you out of the dining room and through the house, he opens the front door and steps out with you, the same man that brought you down here is standing on a boat that is floating in that is floating on a glowing surface.

Chris lifts you up onto the boat before climbing in himself. "Where to?" the ferryman asks.

"666 Hellside lane," Chris says to the man.

Chris pulls a coin out of his pocket and hands it to the man. The ferryman begins rowing the boat and you and Chris just stand in silence.

You take in the scenery, large pits of fire with people burning in them next to large pits with meadows and people running around happily. You look into the large pit of fire, seeing the pain and agony on the people's faces as they burn, you reach out for them, wanting to help but a firm grasp on your extended wrist stops you from being able to reach them. "Don't," Chris warns.

"They're suffering," you try to plead with him, pleading for people you don't even know.

"And for a good fucking reason, they lived evil lives," Chris explains.

"B-but they were still just people," you swallow the lump in your throat.

"Bad people," Chris reminds you, "the morals of your world don't always apply down here, but I know for a fact that all the souls in that burning pit deserve to be down there, burning."

You blink at the man, "is that where I'll go? Will you send me there?"

"Never," he replies immediately, "in no reality would I make you suffer like them."

"W-would your father s-send me there?" you ask with teary eyes at the thought.

Chris gently cups your face, "don't worry about my father, I won't let him hurt you."

You nod and Chris wipes a tear that had fallen with his thumb.

The boat stopped and Chris got off first, he lifted you up and helped you down off the boat afterwards. You looked up at the large house in front of you. Ornate and beautiful on the outside. Chris opened the front door and you walked in before he closed the door behind the two of you.

The living room was magnificent, high ceilings with stained glass windows, a large couch in the middle and a fireplace across from it. "Woah," you gawk.

After a moment of silence, Chris speaks, "your room is down there," he points down the hallway with one door at the end.

"My room?" you ask.

"Yeah," he says softly, "all yours," he smiles.

"B-but what about you?" you ask.

"My room is upstairs, it's the first room on the right," he informs.

"Oh," you say.

"Yeah, just make yourself comfortable and if there's anything you need, I'll just be in my room or in my office," he explains softly.

He starts to walk away, "wait!" you call to him, he turns around and looks at you, "my cats, Cookie a-and Oreo- they're still on Earth, I-I don't want them to be lonely or g-go hungry," you tell him.

"I'll go get them for you," he instantly replies.

"They can come down here?" you ask enthusiastically.

Chris walks to you and tucks a piece of your hair behind your ear, "of course they can, I do have a dog though, but she's really friendly, her name is Berry, she's probably playing outside," he tells you, "I'll go and get your cats and bring them back here."

"O-okay, t-thank you," you thank him.

He smiles softly and leaves out the front door. You stand there for a moment, not knowing what to do with yourself, before you decide to check out your bedroom.

You open the door and look around, it looked similar to your bedroom back on Earth. You opened one of the doors in the room to see a huge walk in closet. Multiple floors tall and full of any types of clothes you could think of.

You open another door to see a whole on-suite bathroom. With a huge shower and a jacuzzi tub.

You walk back into the closet, looking for a pair of pajamas. You find a key pad with many buttons, you cautiously press the button that says 'sleepwear' and the closet starts to move around.

The many racks of clothing shuffle around for a moment before the sliding doors open, revealing all kinds of pajamas.

You opt for a blue matching silk pajama set, you slip the clothes on and decide to look around the house that was now yours. You opened one of the large doors that lead to a large grassy area that was fenced in with a metal gate. You take a seat on the back porch, close your eyes, and try to wrap your mind around the day you had.

You hear a dog bark beside you and you open your eyes to see a dog with three heads staring at you. Your first reaction is to scream, not used to the supernatural sight. But one of the dog's heads starts licking your face, making you burst into a fit of laughter.

You sit up and look at the small dog, you look at the large collar around it's neck and read the name. "Berry," you say the dog's name out loud.

The dog perks up and jumps into your lap, "hi, Berry," you coo, "aren't you gorgeous," you say as you pet her.

You sit with the three-headed dog until you hear the back door open, Chris leaning against the door frame carrying your two cats, one in each hand.

Berry rushes to Chris' side, her tail wagging a mile a minute.

You sit up and walk to Chris, gently taking your cat, Oreo, from his arms, give Oreo a kiss and gently pet him. "Thank you," you thank Chris again.

"Don't mention it," he smiles.

You step inside and Chris closes the door behind the two of you. You put Oreo down on the ground and Berry begins sniffing the black and white cat. You turn back to Chris and he hands you your Tortoiseshell cat, Cookie.

You kiss Cookie before you put her on the ground, Berry sniffing her now as well. "You really aren't like your dad," you figure, talking about Chris.

"I hope I'm not," he chuckles lowly, he brushes a strand of hair out of your face, "you should get some sleep," he suggests, "we can talk more in the morning okay?"

He walks you to your room, "wake me up if you ever need anything," he says softly.

You step into your room and Chris closes the door. You hear his footsteps as he walks away from the door.

You did try to sleep, you really did. But you found yourself tossing and turning on the large bed rather than sleeping.

You contemplate waking Chris up for a good ten minutes before deciding you would just watch something on the TV in the living room.

You sat up and walked into the living room, you sat on the large, black, leather couch and grabbed the remote, turning on the TV.

You flipped through channels until you settled on a random channel in a random language you couldn't understand.

"Y/n?" you hear Chris' voice.

You watch the man as he walks down a pair of stairs, rubbing his eyes, wearing nothing but a pair of plaid pajama pants and a pair of red slippers.

"What're you doing up?" he asks softly.

"C-couldn't sleep," you explain quietly.

"O-oh," he hums, walking back up to his bedroom.

Eventually you passed out on the couch, waking up from a nightmare. It took you a moment to fully realize where you were, but you ruled out the fact that you just had a bad dream when you looked around the ornate living room, remembering all that had happened.

A knock on the door made you snap your head up. You hesitantly walk to the door, opening it to reveal Persephone along with a group of servants. "Oh, hello honey!" she muses before stepping into the house as if it was hers.

"W-what are you doing here?" you ask in the most polite way you can.

"Well it's your wedding day!" she announces like it's obvious.

"M-my wh-what?"

"Oh dear, don't play dumb! C'mon we need to get you fitted for a dress," she hums.

She drags you by your arm to your room before practically pulling your clothes off, only leaving you in your underwear. You try to cover yourself but she is swatting your hands away as the servants begin taking your measurements with measuring tapes. "Do you like the color black?" Persephone asks as a servant shows her different fabrics and colors.

"I-I-it's okay?"

"And do you like glitter?"

"N-not really."

"Dear," she scolds, "you should be serious about this, we have the Christian Dior working on this."

"Christian Dior?"

"Yes the owner and founder of Dior-"

"I know who Christian Dior is b-but why?"

"Well your wedding should be perfect!" she exclaims.

"Mom," Chris' voice comes from the door to your room.

"You're not supposed to see each other before the ceremony!" Persephone whines.

"I understand you're excited, but go easy on y/n m'kay? She is scared," he points out and looks at you.

"Oh, c'mon it's just marriage!"

"Mom," he says more firmly, "it's marriage."

"Oh fine," Persephone huffs, "y/n what are your favorite flowers by the way? My brother is going to make us some!"

"Felix is coming?" Chris asks.

"All of Olympus is coming!" Persephone cackles.

"Olympus!" you shriek, "I'm going to pass out!"

Chris lunges forward to support you and keep you standing while his mother and her servants are whispering and talking amongst themselves. "Here, let's get you in some clothes," Chris figures.

If you were naive you would think he's being kind, but honestly you don't know if you can afford to be naive at the moment.

Chris walks to the closet and grabs a pair of clothes and hands them to you. You swiftly pull them on before Persephone is grabbing your hand and pulling you into a seat. One of her servants pulling out a makeup bag and slapping a primer on your skin. "Chris!" An unfamiliar voice calls.

You turn your head to see a blonde boy with freckles standing in the doorway calling to your soon to be husband. "Felix, hey man," Chris says, embracing the man-Felix.

"Oh hey, you must be y/n! Nice to meet you! I'm Demeter's son! Gosh it is scorching down here!" he exclaims and fans himself with his hand.

"Well it's almost like it's hell," you retort.

"Well yeah, dear Zeus, Persephone how can you love someone so much to stay down here for as long as you do!" he exclaims.

"Well you know how much I love Hades," she chuckles to her brother.

You sit still as the servants begin styling your hair and applying your makeup.

"Is Zeus coming?" Chris asks.

"No! Silly! He is far too busy! But he's sending Hyunjin on his behalf," Persephone announces.

"Persephone, the dress is done!" one of the servants says.

"Oh lovely! Y/n look at this! Isn't it stunning!" Persephone calls and shows you the large black ballgown dress.

"Y-yeah, beautiful," you shrug as you feel tears welling up in your eyes.

"It's so beautiful she's crying isn't that sweet!" Persephone proclaims.

You feel so claustrophobic in the room, as you try to bite down your tears. "Mom," Chris starts, "she is crying because she doesn't want to do this."

"Christopher!" Persephone shouts, "she will deal with it! As will you! This is destiny!"

"You don't have to like your destiny!" Chris' voice booms.

You can't help but mentally compare him to his father, they yell the same way. Chris has a better temper but they both can hate the same way.

"Ok," Felix breaks the tension, "Seph why don't you go and get ready I'll watch over them."

Your eyes go wide as you watch Persephone leave the room in a huff. "Sorry you had to hear that y/n," Felix apologizes for his sister and his nephew, "they both have quite a temper."

You turn your head back and wait until the servants finished your makeup and hair.

Chris and Felix eventually left when it was time for you to put on the wedding dress, saying they'd meet you at the venue.

You slipped on the dress in silence and one of the servants tightened the corset on the back.

The boat ride to the venue was silent, only thanking the ferryman and handing him a silver coin when he dropped you off.

"Hi my dear," an old woman greets you at the gate of the garden you were dropped off at, "my name is Clotho, I'm one of the Fates, my sisters are busy today but they give you and Chris their blessing!"

"Please tell Lachesis to cut my time short, I don't want to do this," you plead to the old woman.

"Dear," she coughs, "you'll be immortal once you marry him, it's not like she can do anything."

"I would rather die," you comment.

"I shouldn't tell you your fate, but you do fall in love with him, may as well let it happen," she whispers to you.

Your eyes widen in shock and she holds your hand walking you down the aisle in the garden.

A piano playing a tune in the background as you walk down the aisle with the woman.

Chris is waiting at the end of the aisle and you see Hades standing at the center.

You cry as you stand up there and Hades pronounces you married. Not wanting this to be your fate.

"You may kiss the bride," Hades instructs Chris.

Chris rolls his eyes before gently cupping your face and bringing you in for a kiss that lasts only a second.

You sob on the boat ride back to your house, mascara running down your face. You run to your bedroom and cry into the pillows. Crying until you feel like throwing up.

You had been living in the same house as Chris for a few days, and you finally were able to sleep in your bed at night.

A knock on your door is what woke you up, you sat up and rubbed your eyes while the door creaked open, "y/n," Chris calls out to you.

"Mhm," you grunt sleepily.

"Hey, I got you a present," he explains.

You rise up out of bed and let Chris lead you to where the present is. He has you sit down on the couch and close your eyes and you feel a weight being put on your extended hands. "Okay, you can open your eyes now," Chris says.

You slowly open your eyes and look at the box in your hands, you look up at him before you open the pretty black box. You look at the ticket stubs for a moment, and read the text. Concert tickets, for your favorite band.

"D'you like them? I don't want this marriage as much as you, but I figured a wedding gift wouldn't hurt that much?" Chris asks.

"Like them? Chris-" the words are caught in your throat, "I love them," you smile.

"I-I got you two, that way you can go with one of your friends on earth," he grins.

"I- thank you," you thank him, you throw your arms around him in a warm embrace.

"Of course, y/n, anything to make you feel a bit better," he says dutifully.

Chris showed you over and over again that he would give you anything and everything your heart would desire.

From making a whole art studio in your shared house because you once mentioned that you liked painting during a dinner conversation.

To giving you a phone so you could talk to your friends who were on Earth.

There was no doubt, he cared for you. And you couldn't help but care for him as well.

"Guess who," you peek your head into Chris' office.

He was sitting at his desk with papers laid out over the surface.

"Hey, sweet girl," he hums when he sees you.

He motions you over and you obey, he taps his thigh for you to sit on, and you do. His arm rests on your waist, and you watch as he works. "What'cha doin?" you ask him.

"Finishing up some paperwork for the company," he explains, "did you need anything, honey?" he asks.

You shake your head, "no, jus' wanted to be close to you," you confess.

Chris cocks a brow, "yeah?" he coos gently.

You nod, "yeah, I like being around you."

A smile breaks out onto his face and he turns his full attention to you. "I like being around you too," he confesses.

Later that night you find yourself in your bed, staring up at the ceiling.

You felt hot all over as you thought about Chris, how caring he was, how handsome he was, how dominant he was.

You hadn't felt that way before, what were you supposed to do? That was the first night you felt the intense wanting for Chris. And it certainly wasn't your last.

Every night for the next week you'd think of Chris, you would feel tingly all over, to the point where it drove you crazy. You didn't know what to do with this feeling that was coming from your cunt.

You knock on the door to Chris' bedroom, you hear footsteps before Chris opens up the door, "honey, hey what's going on?" he asks when he sees the tears in your eyes, concern laced in his voice.

"I feel weird," you sniffle.

"Oh, sweet girl," he coos, he gently pulls you into his room and pulls you onto his chest, "tell me what's going on?" he requests.

"I just keep feeling weird, a-and I d-dunno what t'do," you confess.

"Feel weird where?" he inquires.

Your face goes red and you whisper to him, "my- y'know."

He looks at you for a moment before breaking out into a fit of laughter, you swat at him, "I'm being serious!" you whine.

"You haven't like-" he pauses, "masturbated before?"

You shake your head no, and watch as his face breaks out into a look of realization. You tuck your head into his chest as blush creeps onto your face. "Hey, shh, it's okay honey, don't be embarrassed," Chan reassures.

He tilts your chin up so you're looking at him, "whatever you want, I'll give it to you," he hums, his thumb gently caressing your chin.

"Daddy," the words leave your mouth before you can stop yourself.

Chris groans before pulling you in for a gentle kiss, he quickly pulls away before looking in your eyes again. He only looks at you momentarily before pulling you back in for another, more heated, kiss.

That night Chris watched as you touched yourself, gently talking you through the new feelings and watching as you writhed around on his bed from the pleasure.

You heard the front door open and sprung up from your place on the couch to see Chris walk inside. He had just gotten back from work. He looked exhausted from the day's activities. "Chri-" you begin but he cuts you off by crossing the space between the two of you and slamming his lips onto yours.

"Daddy-" you mumble against his lips.

"Hmm?" Chris hums.

"Wanna help you relax," you mutter.

"Just let me kiss you honey," he insists, "let me give you special kisses."

"Special kisses?"

"Yeah," he hums, he pulls your pants down without warning.

Staring at your cunt, he gently kisses your mound over your panties. "I'm the only one who can kiss you here, you understand?" he growls.

"Yes," you whine.

Chris pulls your panties to the side before placing a tender kiss on your clit.

You moan and your fingers run through his hair, "that's a good girl," Chris hums.

You feel two of his fingers press into your entrance and you squirm around due to the unfamiliar sensation. "Daddy," you whine.

Chris' plump lips keep sucking on your clit while one of his fingers pistons in and out of your cunt. One finger turns into two, two into three, until you're gushing all over his face without a chance to warn him.

"That's it," he coos, "such a sweet little pussy," he groans, fingering you through your orgasm.

He places a kiss above your mound before slapping your pussy. You jolt at the contact and watch as Chris sits up and pulls his pants down.

"Here you go honey, gonna give you a treat for being a good little girl for me," he muses.

He strokes his fat cock in front of you before lining it up at your soaking entrance. "Daddy-" you whine.

"Daddy's here, don't worry babydoll," he hums as he pushes into you.

You squirm around as you feel more and more of his cock enter you. "That's it, take it like the slut that you are," Chris spits.

The only thing leaving your mouth at this point is broken cries of Chris' title. Chris sets a menacingly fast pace, pounding into you with your legs thrown over his shoulders.

You feel as his hands run down your stomach, stopping on your lower tummy, "I can fucking feel myself inside you," Chris comments.

You move your hand down and feel the area where his cock is bulging in and out of you. "Oh my god!" you scream as you cum around him.

"That's it, atta girl," he praises, "let me fill you up, let daddy pump a baby into his sweet little girl."

"Yes," you whine, "f-fuck a baby into me w-wan' you t'fill me up please!" you beg.

Chris' movements become sporadic and you start to feel his hot cum seeping into you. He keeps fucking into you as he cums, making sure you take each last drop of his seed.

Honestly, hell wasn't even hotter than Christopher Bahng.

[ghostofhyuck]

NCT Dream when you caught them cheating.

AN: Remember that this is a work of fiction and does NOT reflect the people mentioned. Also this is a college au so that it makes so much sense for them to be assholes, lol. (Let's not tolerate cheating!!! Some of these are emotional cheating, still considered cheating tho.) Mentions of insecurities and trust issues by the way. 

Mark Lee ; Met up with his ex-girlfriend.

You're still insecure about his ex-girlfriend and Mark knows that. So when your friends saw him on a coffee shop with her, they immediately confronted him and told you. Privately, you asked him about it, but he couldn't give you a straight answer. He wasn't looking at you properly and was being defensive. You can see tears in his eyes, but you know that there's a reason why he met up with her. Your thoughts are still clouded with your emotions, so you walked away, asking Mark to give you space. 

Huang Renjun ; Saw him holding hands with his 'girl best friend.'

You always have doubts with Renjun's girl best friend. When you first met her, she seems sweet but was a bit clingy to Renjun. So when you saw them together, holding hands, you feel weirded about it. Later on, you opened it up to Renjun and he becomes defensive about his best friend, and he told you that you're overeacting. You tried to defend yourself and wonder why your boyfriend is on his best friend's side. The argument stopped when Renjun walked away first, leaving you there to cry. 

Lee Jeno ; Found out that he slept with another girl.

It was his friend who told you about it. Your heart starting to beat fast and your hands became shaky when you saw the text. When you asked Jeno about it, the first thing he said was sorry. And it broke your heart because it was true that he slept with someone. You tried to be rational, even though your chest is starting to feel tight. His explanation was shallow, and he kept on apologizing to you numerous times, but you couldn't look at him the same way anymore. "I think we should break-up." 

Lee Donghyuck ; Drunk-called his ex-girlfriend.

Last night you had doubts because Haechan wasn't replying to your text when he said he's going out to party with his friends. Now a text from his ex-girlfriend popped on your messages. She explained it like as if she was girl's girl but you know that she's half-bragging at you that Haechan called him saying that he still loves her. So when you confronted Haechan about it, he'll be shocked, explaining that he was drunk and he thought that he was calling you. But you've passed the "I'm drunk" excuse, you called it off with him and while he was trying to win you back, you know that you can't trust him anymore.

Na Jaemin ; Drunk-kissed a stranger.

You saw it. You witnessed it, and you can't believe that you put so much trust on Jaemin. You saw how eager that kiss was and how he smiled at the stranger when the kiss broke. You felt your tears flowing and at that moment, Jaemin saw you. He was able to follow you when you walked out of the club, trying to explain to you what you just saw but you're not taking any of his bullshit. "Stop trying to make excuse about it Jaemin, I saw what I saw." you said with a gritted teeth. "Let's just break-up." 

Zhong Chenle ; Flirting with strangers in a club.

You two had a small argument before going to a club with your friends. You tried to loosen up but you didn't expect that Chenle would go around tables flirting with other girls. You felt your chest tightening at the sight of your boyfriend laughing with other girls while you two are not okay. You walked-out of the club, not even saying goodbye to your friends. You tried to wipe the tears away, typing "Have fun there because we're done," to Chenle before going home. The next day, he sent you tons of messages trying to explain himself but you don't want to believe him anymore. 

Park Jisung ; Has been venting to his 'girl best friend' instead to you.

Lately Jisung has been so distant with you and you tried to understand him given that college is really hectic. But when you found yourself in the middle of him having a conversation with his girl best friend and she slipped something out that you don't know, you started to have doubts. You confronted Jisung about it and while he explained that he doesn't want to burden you with his worries, you felt as if he doesn't trust you enough. You two ended up having an argument about it, making Jisung walk away. "Go! Go to your best friend and tell her that we had a fight! Might as well date her while you're at it!" you shouted even though tears are streaming from your eyes. 

[nickfurysrighteye]

college au!chase davenport x fem!reader

summary: you're a college student. you go on a date with adam, the campus' fuckboy, but you didn't know he had a brother...

cw: kinda nsfw!! swearing, mentions of sex/hooking up, heavy make out in a public place, you and chase get reaaally touchy, adam's an asshole (sorry adam). that's it :)

a/n: part 2 here!! this is not what i was going for when writing another chase x reader but i thought "fuck it, chase smut"

minors do not interract!!

"y/n guess what, this guy at the party yesterday told me he saw you on campus and wanted to ask you out so i told him we're roommates and he gave me his number." your roommate says, the morning after she went to a frat party.

"wait really? what's his name?" you reply with a mix of surprise and excitement in your voice.

"adam davenport"

"oh my god that fuckboy wanted my number?!" you say, kind of disappointed. frat guys weren't really your type and adam was definitely the complete opposite of what you want in a guy. he is known on campus for two things: his parties and being a total asshole to girls.

"i don't want anything to do with him, especially after my last relationship, i don't need a guy like that."

"you don't have to date him, what you need is a rebound to forget your ex. go out with him, hook up and then leave, that's what he does anyway." your friend's plan wasn't that bad, you take it into consideration.

"to be fair, adam is kinda hot and i do need a rebound..sure i'll text him, why not."

-

adam didn't live on campus, he had a small apartment downtown his father paid for so he didn't have to live in the dorms. after a bit of texting he asked you to come over to his place. you didn't expect much from this date, your idea was to follow your roommate's plan and you made sure to look your best in order to go through with it.

"hey, come on in." adam says opening the door for you. the apartment was small but tidy. you enter the apartment and make your way into the living room, which was an open space including the kitchen. sitting at the kichen island was a brunette guy with a black long sleeve tshirt, focused writing something on his laptop. he looks away from the screen the moment he hears your voice.

"hi, I'm y/n."

"oh, he's my brother, chase. we're roommates, don't pay attention to him."

"you're in college too, chase?" you ask.

"yeah i'm a physics major." he looks at you and slightly smile, a small dimple forming on his cheek.

"no way i'm a physics major too, how come i've never seen you at the lectures?"

"getting noticed by girls is not his strong suit. why don't we go to my room, we can watch a movie." adam says quickly, trying to get you away from his brother. it was clear he wasn't supposed to be there but adam couldn't do anything about it.

instead, you get closer to chase "what are you working on?"

"i'm writing a paper on the poly-exclusion principle. it's weird, usually the girls adam brings home don't do this much talking. they aren't physics major either. " he stops writing and leans a bit onto the table to get closer to you. he looks at you with that slight smile. his eyes were like watercolors, brown blue and green swirling together, framed by the fair mauve color of the skin underneath. he wasn't getting as much sleep as he should be.

you want to reply but his beauty his mesmerizing. his ruffled brown hair, his rosy lips, his hands, which had a dash of red on the knuckles from the cold weather. you just can't look away.

"ok that's enough small talk, let's go y/n" adam interrupts your brief conversation, taking you by the arm and slowly leading you to the corridor.

"if you're going to have sex please be quiet. i have a lot of work to do." chase says loudly as the two of you walk away.

how many girls does he bring home? do i really wanna be just a number? you think as you walk into adam's room. you start to reconsider your plan, you aren't so sure you want to hook up with him anymore.

-

adam's laptop is set on the bed, a movie playing in the background. you're making out but it's not leading anywhere, too many thoughts going through your head.

"so...you wanna hook up or..?" adam pulls away from the kiss.

"uhh..i-"

adam stops you mid sentence "it's ok if you don't, but if we're not gonna do it then imma ask you to leave."

"what?" his audacity baffles you.

"yeah imma be honest, that's the only reason i asked you out so if you're not cool with that there's no reason to keep this going. i actually have another girl i gotta call-"

"oh my fucking god you cannot be serious." you stand up, hastily gather your things and head to the door.

"what? i said i was gonna be honest." adam says suprised.

"listen i knew you were famous for one night stands but jesus fucking christ have some tact!" you open the front door and leave, swinging it close behind you.

"byee! have a good night!" chase shouts, sitting in the same spot with his eyes glued to the screen. "well that's a first! she was nice."

"fuck off chase."

-

the next day you decided to spend the afternoon studying at the campus' library. you arrive later than you usually do and hope to still find a good spot. after a some wondering around you see a familiar figure sitting at a table with a laptop open. the brown haired boy from the previous night sitting at the table alone, you walk over to him.

"hey, chase, right?" you remembered his name, matter of fact you thought about him a lot after leaving adam's apartment, there's something about him that just pulls you in you can't help it.

"hey, good to see you here." he smiles again, this time showing his pearly white teeth.

"mind if i sit here with you?"

"no, not at all."

"how's the paper turning out?" you pick the the seat right across him.

"It's driving me insane, i think i spent so much time writing it I'm starting to show signs of severe sleep deprivation. how about you? what are you studying?" he rubs his tired eyes and run his fingers through his already messy hair. that boy seriously needs to sleep.

"i'm just going over some course material. I've missed a couple lectures, not that the professor knows how to teach this stuff anyway." you say as you take out your books and laptop out of your bag.

"i can help you out if you want." he leans a bit to see what material you're going to revise.

"that would be great, actually. thank you so much."

a few hours go by and now the room you're in is basically empty, the only sound filling the deep silence is the quiet mormouring of you and Chase talking. the two of you are now sitting next to eachother, not really studying, you gave that up around half an hour ago.

"by the way i'm so sorry about adam, he can be a real asshole sometimes."

"don't worry about it. if i knew he had a brother i wouldn't have gone out with him." a light chuckle leaves your mouth as you finish your sentence, then you realize the words you just pronounced. you turn your eyes upon chase and see him with his head lightly tilted, a smirk on his face and his watercolored eyes gazing at you with a glimpse of amusement. he chuckles.

"i'm sorry, that was weird. forget i said that. what i meant was adam's not my type anyway." an even worse feeling washes over you, god why can't i just shut up your thoughts are interrupted suddenly by chase's low and soft voice.

"what's your type then?" so many words fill up your thoughts but none are coming out. you stare at his lips, his soft, plum, roseate lips that had a blood colored aura in the center. you want to know what it's like to kiss them, to bite them, to feel them all over you, to feel them brush against your neck as he whispers sweet words to you.

you don't say anything, your body leans closer to him and you slowly close your eyes, all of a sudden you feel your lips meeting with chase's for a quick moment. your eyes open again and your faces are inches apart. chase places carefully a hand on your cheek and gently places his lips back on yours. he moves with such care it seems if he kisses you any harder you're going to break. he kisses you so tenderly it sends chills down your spine. he's so gentle and warm, it's like cold was the only thing your body has ever known until he touched you and heated you up.

he brushes his tongue against your lower lip and haltingly pushing it into your mouth, making your tongue swirl together. you felt your body get even hotter, your heart starts to race, his tongue felt so good you didn't want the kiss to end. his hands start to wonder down your body, feeling every curve, caressing you, studying your shape with his fingertips. his hands go down until they reach your hips, then they slowly make their way back up. he stops right underneath your breasts. your body's craving more of his touch. you need to feel him. all of him. you move one of his hand up and he cups one of your breasts squeezing it, making you moan softly into the kiss. your sweet sounding moan makes his lungs clench and cheeks burn. as he starts to lightly circle around your nipple with his thumb your hands travel up his thighs and get closer to his groin. his pants are getting tighter.

just like that chase pulls away from the kiss and moves his hands away. "we're in public, i think we went a little too far."

you laugh, "yeah i- uh, i think so." you don't care, truth be told if it were for you, you'd be bent over the table with your pants pulled down and chase pumping his dick into you. you couldn't care less about someone accidentally seeing you, you need more of his touch. you've never craved anything more than this. you need him.

"It's getting late, we should go." chase starts to gather his things. "we- uh, we should study together again...sometimes."

"yeah, sure uh...here..take this." you rip a piece of paper from your notebook, write your number on it and hand it to him. "text me, or call me or whatever you want." you pack your things.

"sure i'll see you at the lecture, goodnight." chase leaves and as he walks out of the library he looks at the small piece of paper.

"adam's gonna kill me"

-

a/n: thanks for reading <33 PART 2

[auras-moonstone]

can i ask for shy!camp counselor ethan? like he’s great with kids but he’s very reserved around the rest of the crew. and reader is kind of extroverted. basically simp!!!! ethan

want to know you better — ethan landry

word count: 1,183

pairing: camp counselor!ethan landry x camp counselor!fem!reader

summary: after y/n defended ethan to their crew, she finally makes a conversation with him.

author’s note: this one is a bit short bc i’ve been super busy with college😫 on the bright side, part two of “august” is almost finished, so that’ll be my next post! 🫶🏻

Y/N COULDN’T RECALL ONE MOMENT IN WHICH ETHAN HAD WILLINGLY TALKED TO HER, OR ANYONE ELSE ON THE CREW FOR THE MATTER. She was very curious about him, the kids loved him and he seemed so sweet, but he always stayed silent during meetings and when the staff gathered around to eat.

“He doesn’t make conversation with us but he’s perfectly happy around kids. That’s a red flag” Vince, a staff member said while looking at Ethan, who was making the kids play by the lake.

“I wouldn’t say red flag, it’s straight up creepy” Joss replied with a laugh.

“Stop it” Y/N glared at them. “He’s not creepy, he’s just shy. Besides, I don’t blame him. You guys can be real mean sometimes.”

“Aw, does Y/N have a little crush?” Diana teased her.

“Really, Y/N? On Ethan? He’s not your type at all” Nate said.

“And how the fuck do you know if he’s my type or not?” Nate raised his hands in surrender “Whatever, I don’t have a crush on him, I’m just not a dick like you guys.”

“Come on, Y/N/N. You have to admit he’s weird” Diana scrunched her nose.

“He’s not. He doesn’t talk, so what? Have you tried to make a conversation with him?” she asked them, and they stayed silent. “Exactly my point. We haven’t been the most welcoming people.”

“I just get a weird vibe from him” Vince said, shrugging.

“Yeah, he’s giving psychopath” Nate agreed, making the rest of them laugh.

Y/N rolled her eyes “And you’re giving world’s biggest assholes” she stood up and made her way towards Ethan and the kids, ignoring how they called her name.

When the kids caught sight of her, they started jumping in excitement. “Y/N! Please help us, Ethan is being boring!”

Y/N gasped dramatically “Oh, how dare he! What do you need?”

“We want to play with the water guns” one of the kids said.

The older girl crossed her arms in front of her chest “How do you know about the water guns? They were supposed to be a secret until tomorrow. Have you been spying on our meetings?”

“No! Ethan let it slip” they replied, making the camp counselor glare at them, and muttered ‘Traitors’.

Y/N laughed and Ethan swooned. She was just so pretty, and her laugh was angelic “Wow, you snitched on him so fast, you don’t deserve Ethan’s kindness.”

“Boo, we thought you would be on our side, Y/N/N!”

“Fine, I don’t want to lose my spot as your favorite counselor, so let’s bring the water guns” she said, making the kids scream in excitement.

“We are not supposed to” Ethan said in a low tone.

Y/N stared at him, the sound of his voice surprised her. It was deep and calm, and nice to hear “Don’t worry, we can change the day of the activity. It’ll be fun. Besides, you can get your revenge on them for handing you in.” she smiled playfully.

Ethan’s smile was unlike anything Y/N had ever seen. His pearly white teeth were hypnotic and he had the most beautiful boyish laugh Y/N had ever heard. Now she really wished she’d talked to him sooner, she would have had that sight for longer.

The two counselors walked towards the supply closet to grab the water guns, fully aware of the rest of the crew’s eyes on them. She sent a dirty glare on their way.

“I’m sorry, Ethan.” Y/N said. Ethan looked at her expecting her to go on “For not talking to you earlier this summer. I know you’re too shy to make conversation, so I should’ve been the one to start it.”

Ethan shook his head “It’s okay.”

“It’s not” she quickly replied. “Even if we’re here for the job, it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t have fun. And you don’t deserve to spend your summer alone.”

“Thank you” Ethan smiled softly, his cheeks turning red. “I’m not sure the rest of the crew likes you talking to me.”

“I don’t care what those idiots have to say about me.” Y/N shrugged.

“Thank you for defending me earlier, by the way” he finally said. Y/N widened her eyes. “Yes, I heard. They aren’t exactly low talkers.”

“I’m sorry you had to hear that. It was awful, what they were saying.”

“A wise woman once said, I don’t care what those idiots have to say about me” Ethan said, in a weird period-drama kind of voice.

Y/N bursted out laughing and Ethan’s heart started racing “Those are some wise words indeed.”

“Can we play now or are you going to keep flirting?” the annoyed voice of a little girl said.

The two blushing messes holding the water guns shifted uncomfortably. They didn’t notice until the moment it was addressed, but they were flirting. And it felt good.

“Okay” Y/N said once everyone had their guns. “Let’s divide into groups.”

The kids exchanged smiles, and the counselors started to worry. Ethan looked at Y/N “They had schemed against us.”

“Kids…?”

“Attack!”

Before they knew it, the two authority figures were completely drenched. Y/N quickly grabbed Ethan’s hands and they started to run, the kids following their trails.

“Stop it, you monsters! You betrayed me!” Y/N yelled as she ran.

“You switched to Ethan’s side! Now you pay the consequences” they yelled back.

“Maybe… maybe we should stop” Ethan tried to catch his breath. “They’ll run out of water eventually. And I can’t breathe anymore.”

“Okay” Y/N agreed. “We surrender.”

The kids circled them once again, and they splashed them with water until their guns emptied. “Little devils” Ethan muttered as they fled the scene.

“That was fun, though” Y/N laughed.

The boy nodded “Your hair is sticking on your cheeks” Ethan laughed, putting her hair strands behind her ear. His deep brown eyes met hers and Ethan’s breath hitched. “You…” he shook his head and blushed “Never mind.”

“That’s the worst thing you can say to an over thinker. Now you have to spill it or I won’t be able to sleep until I know what you were going to say” Y/N told him, trying to ignore that she could still feel his touch on her skin.

“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” he sighed.

“Oh, shit. Do I have something in my face, in my teeth? Fuck, just te-” she asked embarrassed.

“I wanted to say you are beautiful.” he cut her off, not being able to meet her eyes. He glanced at his hands nervously.

Y/N took the chance to study his face. His puppy eyes were her favorite thing about him, she decided. But he also had beautiful long eyelashes, an adorable nose, and rosy cheeks to die for. His skin looked soft, and she couldn’t help but touch it. Y/N’s fingers grazed his jaw, making him look at her.

“And you’re gorgeous” Y/N said softly. “And I love how the kids seem to love you. You’re funny, and sweet and I want to know you better, if you want to.”

“I would really like that.” he nodded, smiling from ear to ear.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

aita for calling my roommate crazy?

I (28f) live with 2 other people, a former college roommate who I’m pretty close with (29f) and 2nd roommate (28nb) who we both met when we moved in together 2 years ago.

Let me start this out by saying, this isn’t a fandom aita, it’s going to sound a bit weird at first, but bear with me.

I have a medical condition (relevant later) which stopped most of my bones from maturing past puberty (growth plates closing, cartilage not hardening into bones, ect.), so my skeleton is basically stuck somewhere between 13-19, (I look about 17-19, but the last time I tried to buy hard cider, the cashier thought I was 14, so that’s how young I can look). I also have very pale skin (unrelated to my disorder, just a ginger), and (related to my disorder) lack some liver enzymes so I need eat meat or I get sick (the same reason why cats need to eat meat), I ended up in the ER when I lived with my vegan sister for a week and ate the same veggie diet as her.

Trouble is, Roommate 2 is really into conspiracy theories and other fringe stuff. Nothing alt-right or anything, just like, (for example) they fully bought into that Mermaids: the body found show, and wouldn’t be dissuaded, even when Roommate 1 googled it and showed them solid proof that it was fictional. Wholeheartedly believes the US government preformed 9/11, does alternative medicine (homeopathy, ect), wishes there were ‘all natural’ vaccines (still isn’t an anti-vaccer though, just needs to be persuaded that Bill Gates didn’t put microchips in them).

Anyway, Roommate 1 and I have a recurring joke that I’m a vampire because of the meat thing and the pale thing and the not aging thing. Roommate 2 overheard us and laughed, but weirdly. She kinda joked along with us, but she seemed...odd. About a week later, they start asking me stuff about being a vampire. But they seemed friendly and not nervous then and I was hoping they were just joking and I also sincerely thought they were just asking me about how vampires work on one of my shows (I’m a big fan of Carmilla and the Originals), so I tried to explain, but I cited each show when I’m explaining a thing. This continued for several weeks, but getting worse and more weird every time, eventually culminating about 2 and a half months later into them asking me more stuff about life as a vampire and I really realised that they were serious. Bear in mind, Roommate 1 and I were trying to be very clear that we don’t believe in vampires this whole time because we both know how Roommate 2 is about this. As a result, this was the first time I really registered that they seriously seemed to genuinely believe I was a vampire. I firmly told them that I am not a vampire and that vampires aren’t real, they’re fun to joke about, but they aren’t real. They implored me ‘to be straight with them about being a vampire,’ and that ‘I could trust them,’ and I’m ashamed to say, I kinda freaked out at this point, cuz I was afraid that they would be scared of me and maybe try to hurt me, since they seemed kinda unstable because of this.

This is where I think I was an asshole, I am usually very sensitive to mental health issues. I have some c-PTSD myself and there are a lot of mental health issues in my family (unfortunately, I think some history with my own mentally ill father may have made me react this way, since he has very similar issues to Roommate 2 (vaccines, alternate medicines, specifically involving me in his delusions) and I had a very bad experience in my early teens where he thought I was a demon and ‘sent to destroy him’). Anyway, I got very upset and I yelled at them, I told them they were completely crazy and needed to get mental help and said I thought Roommate 1 and I needed to move out because they might try to stake my heart or something. I feel really bad for calling them crazy, especially because Roommate 2 has some very mental health issues and words like crazy make light of and stigmatise that and I’m very big into not blaming people for their mental health problems, but this was very triggering and in this moment I was very distresssed.

So, aita, all things considered here? I’m still gonna feel like the asshole no matter what, since mental health problems aren’t to be taken lightly or blamed on the person, but I’m curious what the internet thinks.

What are these acronyms?

[opertabry]

| notes; 34. yes? no? ( half written )

[ synopsis; there’s a cute girl that always sleeps in your intro pysch class. she just so happens to be ginger AND your dorm neighbor ]

YES? NO?;

haerin,

you said freesias were your favourite flowers, so i got some for you! hope you like them :)

i heard normal freesias symbolise friendship and trust, but i don’t really like that. i don’t think that fits us. white freesias symbolise innocence and purity; fits us a little more, don’t ya think? they’re also used a lot in wedding ceremonies (could be us one day). nah i’m kidding. unless..?

um this is kinda awkward for me, so bear with me please. you know, intro pysch wasn’t the first time i noticed you. i remember seeing you for the first time when we were in high school actually, i never knew who were, just knew that you were that one cute girl from the class down the hall. cute girl from down the hall. has a ring to it, no? and when we got into college, i was kinda glad when i saw you. i was really relieved to see a familiar face, even though we never ended up talking. then i saw you were in my intro pysch class, like what are the odds of that? okay, i’m stalling.

haerin, i think you’ve realised this but i really like you. crazy how this started from me just writing notes for you. well, i mean i’ll still write them for you if you want, i won’t stop. unless you tell me to, which i think would be dumb, because as much as i like you.. you’re kinda failing. no judgement, i swear, just an observation. okay, i’m ranting again. well? is it really considered ranting if i’m writing this? like wouldn’t ranting mean im saying it? okay i’ll stop im sorry. i mena it though, i really like you. it’s okay if you don’t like me back, i just wanted you to know.

with love,

y/n <3

as she read the letter, the soft smile that haerin sported kept on widening - which didn’t go unnoticed by her dormmate (unfortunately for her, not for you though).

you jumped up from where you were sitting on the couch, earning a shriek from hanni and sprinted towards your room. you ripped a piece of paper out of your notebook, grinning as you scribbled messily;

be my gf?

[ ] yes [ ] no

leaning back to admire your work (it really wasn’t that impressive), you felt a rush of happiness, a flight of butterflies released into your stomach. you folded the note before you jogged back into your living room, reaching for the door knob.

“y/n, what the fuck was that? you scared me, asshole. wait, where are you going?”

“haerin.” that seemed to be enough of an explanation for hanni as she let out an approving hum and turned to resume scrolling on her phone. she’s a weird one, you thought.

you walked over to the dorm next door and plopped yourself down on the floor. you slid the note under the door, something you’ve done countless times before - but this time it was different. leaning your back onto the door, you heard squeals from the other side. now that was definitely danielle. you started grinning and quietly laughing to yourself, gaining some judging looks from students walking down the dorm halls. but you didn’t care because haerin likes you back. you felt like you were back in high school again, the giddy feeling returning as you felt a nudge near your hand, a note being pushed onto your side of the door. you rushed to unfold it;

be my gf?

[x] yes [ ] no

“oh my fucking god.”

[ previous | masterlist | next ]

[taglist] @rd0265667 @kyaitosz @haerinkisser @sserajeans @limbforalimb @brocoliisscared

i’m a liar! (not rlly) but i have like one week off school bcs i’m sick and i just finished a maths test today. so a lil break for me before chaos 😞 BUT!! ik how i’m ending this now, i think next chapter will be the end.

[spiteless-xo]

Okay this thoughts been plaguing my head. Imagine fuck boy college Eren suddenly becoming a dad

🥺 omg this is so.....

i don't have a ton of knowledge about pregnancies so sorry in advance if i say something wrong

╰┈➤ suddenly becoming a dad.

ft. eren, fem!reader. cw. preganacy.

the two of you have been hooking up for a while so he doesn't use condoms anymore, but sometimes shit happens. so you text him to tell him to come over, and he's excited, thinking it's a booty call, but then you show him the positive test.

he thinks you're joking at first. like this is some weird new covid test or something -- but after assuring him that it's legit he gets terrified. the thought of becoming a dad has crossed his mind in the past, sure -- but not now.

i feel like he'll ghost you for a few days -- depending on how long it takes for jean/armin/whoever to convince him he's being an asshole

but then he's at your doorstep, almost in tears, telling you that he's sorry and that he's here for you no matter what. he's willing to step up and take care of the kid -- his kid.

he just treats you like a normal girlfriend for the first while, so nothing is noticeably different at first, except he stays over more than usual and he holds your hand in public

but the first time you go for an ultrasound and you hear the baby's heartbeat.................. this man is in tears.

from then on, he treats you like a queen. he doesn't let you lift a finger because he wants you to focus all your energy on "making our baby big and strong" 🥺

he stops going out to parties every weekend and spends more time chilling at home with you. even starts taking school a little bit more seriously now that he's got a family he has to take care of

(and the first time he catches himself thinking of you and the baby as his family..... he has to pause for a second and just sit with his thoughts -- that's the second time it really hits him that he's about to be a dad after hearing the heartbeat)

he even starts looking up different foods that you should eat to help your baby be healthy, things to avoid, etc. etc. he gets kinda crazy about it, tbh and practically forces you to stay in bed all day and it's not until the doctor says that he's overreacting that he stops

the first time he feels the baby kick, he's full on crying. he's got his hand on your stomach, palms pressed softly against you until he feels the little kick! and then he's looking at you with wide eyes, mouth agape like "babe, i felt it! i felt him kick!" (because he's convinced it's gonna be a boy)

he helps decorate the baby's room with you, and despite his insistence that it should be blue and boy-ish, you convince him to make it gender-neutral just in case. so he paints it a soft green and he builds the crib and the two of you start to get really excited about welcoming a new baby into the world

when you go into labour, he's already ready. he's had a go-bag for you in his trunk for the past few weeks. maybe he's in class when it happens, but the second he sees your text he's rushing to meet you at the hospital -- sprinting out of class yelling "i'm gonna be a dad!"

he gets dressed up in scrubs and ties back his hair so he can sit with you in the delivery room, holding your hand tight and breathing with you as you give birth

his eyes light up when he hears the baby crying for the first time and the doctor announces, "she's a girl!"

his heart feels tight when he sees you holding her for the first time and you point out that she has his eyes. he just can't help but look at the two of you, smiling so hard that his face hurts.

[nashusglasses]

1. sweet, sticky, thick and pretty

(note: I can't stop listening to Bruno Mars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! technically the title is from silk sonic but anywho :3) note 2: Not to be too anecdotal, but I was a loser all my 4 years of university. Don't know why I always have the urge to write about messy college experiences when all I did was make one singular friend. I also only ever went to *one* official frat party! Absolute Loser behaviour!! What I'm saying is I'm projecting hard and LOVE writing about hot asshole men!!!!!!!!! Oh boy!!

PAIRING. gojo/reader SETTING. college au WARNINGS. alcohol and drug consumption, player!satoru but in the sexiest way possible. suggestive content SUMMARY. It's too late for this.

Satoru’s got his white shirt dirty with grass stains. You don’t know what kind of roughhousing Suguru put him through before you got here, but all you know is there’s a keg outside in the backyard and Satoru’s hair is mysteriously wet. You get your answer when he tries to stick his tongue down your throat and he smells too much like beer.

“Absolutely not.” You block his mouth with a hard hand. “Can you please move? I just saw Natsume here.”

“I don’t fucking care. Kiss me.”

“Or what?”

Something coy flashes in Satoru’s face. He probably thinks he’s got you trapped. Hopeless in the dark corner of this hallway, and if you strain your ears hard enough you think you hear weird squelching noises from the room behind you. But all you feel is the annoyed urge to push him back till he stumbles off, embarrassed. There’s nothing more insistent than a drunk Satoru. There’s also nothing you want to punch more than a drunk Satoru.

“I called you. Thirty six times.”

“It was twice, and I was napping after my exam.”

He rolls his eyes. “Pish posh. Listen. Come over tonight.”

“No.” You shove at his shoulder. Except it’s a little rougher than you anticipated, but it’s still nice to see him lose balance. He won’t get angry. Not when he’s horny out of his mind. “I’m finding Natsume now.”

“What if I said pretty please?”

“Then I’ll shove you harder till you eat shit,” you snort. But you don’t get very far when you try to walk on ahead. Satoru’s strong when he wants to be. He’s got a hot hand wrapped around your wrist, a cement block for weight when you try to pull back.

“Stop ignoring me,” he says. “I told you I wanted you.”

“And then I told you I never wanted to see you again.”

“Sometimes I hear things and then I choose not to understand them,” he explains. He closes the distance again. You wonder how many girls have fallen prey to this tactic. Using his height for advantage, the way the corner of his mouth lifts when he wants to look needy. You know he’s grasping at straws, though. His contact list is heavy with the chance to get his lap wet whenever he wants, and even though you’re not sorry for being the additional number, you’re angry that he ever thought you’d be the easier lay.

“Okay. I’ll say it one more time. Just for you.” You tiptoe up to his ear, make sure your every breath lands hot where it’ll make him shiver. “I don’t want you to call me. I don’t want you to look at me. And I want you to leave me alone.”

Satoru’s placid. No expression to dissect when you stand back down, and his grip is lax now. Natsume’s probably halfway done with that first pre-roll she told you she had. You’re almost greedy for the heat in your chest that blunt promises. Sitting on that scratchy couch while your head gets light enough to reconsider Satoru’s proposition. 

You won’t. Even if you do miss the way he feels under you. A part of you wants to say that it’s only out of self-respect, but it’s funny seeing him so desperate. You’ll gloat about it later when Natsume asks you where you’ve been.

Something in Satoru clicks, and he’s grabbing your wrist again. “There’s just–something about you.” 

“Satoru, you’re drunk. We’ve been over this. I know I’ve got godly legs and a tight pussy but you’re just–”

“A man whore,” he finishes for you.

You nod sympathetically. “I’m glad you get it. Do you want me to find Suguru for you?”

“I want you to kiss me,” he complains. “Holy fuck. I’m–I’m fucking drunk. And I told you I wanted you, and I told Akane that she has great tits but not as great as yours, and she slapped the shit out of me, and I told you I wanted you but you don’t want me back.”

“Why the hell would you say that?” You’ve seen her before. Linguistics 202. She’s smart, has killer fashion sense, and Natsume hates her because her eyelashes are long and curled and not fake at all. “You’re so goddamned stupid. I’m going now.”

“I know. I know I’m stupid. Just–before you go.” You raise an eyebrow. “Don’t block my number. Please. That’s all I’m asking.” 

You’ll give him points for begging. The door to the room with mysterious noises opens, and two girls with messy hair filter out noiselessly. No witness to Satoru’s groveling. But you’re kind, so you leave him with a wet kiss to his cheek just to see his eyes go wide. 

“Tell Akane you’re sorry. Then come find me when you’re sober,” you say. 

When you turn around, you text Natsume to find where she is. 

You don’t notice Satoru squeezing his eyes shut, cheeks burning hot, half-hard from the feeling of your mouth on his skin.

[magicaii]

Need a spinneraki non-villain au where both of them are shut in losers. Like, shuichi is a college drop out who’s been a NEET for the past two years and has convinced himself that he will never fit into society so why even bothering trying and doesn’t even care enough to outside anymore and tomura never made it to college at all and just lives off of his rich dad’s (afo) income as he does nothing but stay home to game and browse the internet all day cause he’s addicted to league of legends and he’s a closet scaly.

so imagine tomura and shuichi meeting cause they ended up in the same game because tenko misclicked and chose the wrong tier, and because he’s a bit of a toxic gamer, when he notices shuichi’s character choice he turns on vc just to say, “seriously? fucking zilean in the jungle? you’re never gonna make it out of iron asshole” and he only said it be to be dick and ruin some guy’s day, but he actually ends up advising the guy to choose a better character because he’s weirdly innocent and clueless for a league of legends player and it completely takes tomura aback. he finds out the guy is a complete newbie, which kinda explains it.

and during the game, spinner (his online name) keeps asking him questions since he’s apparently just decided that tomura has signed up to be his guide. and tomura kinda just goes along with it, and they’re the only two talking in vc anyway, although he’s far from nice about it. (think: what the fuck? USE YOUR SKILL or SUPPORT ME IN TOP LANE IDIOT)

so after the game tomura is about to move on with his day but then spinner sends him a friend request and he’s like ??? why does this weirdo think I’d wanna be his friend. but the request comes with a message and it says “haha thx for the help today? I’m kinda new at this… wld appreciate some more guidance n stuff… hope I can be as good as u someday lolz” and now tomura is half convinced this guy is just a fucking troll or something, cause there’s just no way. but what the fuck else is he doing anyway? so they exchange discords to chat.

spinner is strange. sometimes spinner will say things like “why is everyone so nasty in this game :((” and tomura will be genuinely confused because?? everyone knows league of legends is a toxic cesspool?? one day he finally asks what spinner’s deal is and why he started playing, and spinner goes “well tbh I was looking for friends”. tomura just deadpans that he’s definitely looking for them in the wrong place. spinners like, “I thought it would be easy to talk to people since there’s a voice chat but turns out people just use it to yell at each other and get into arguments. why would anyone do that lol, crazy” tomura just pauses cause he doesn’t really know, either. he’s been getting into arguments with random people in voice chat for years, it’s practically become a routine at this point, but he never stopped to think about it much. it’s pretty much become his only source of social interaction apart from his dad. with a pit in his stomach, he just replies “maybe they’re lonely.”

sometimes weird background sounds will come out of tomura’s mic, and spinner, after a while, finally asks, “so I’ve been wondering for a while. sometimes it sounds like someone is being murdered in your basement, what is that” and tomura’s like “oh don’t mind that lmao, it’s just my dad. he’s an investment banker or some shit and he gets fucking tilted at the stock market. idk I mostly tune it out now” and spinner just goes really quiet and says “umm. ok!”

[peppermintsparker]

tonight (is gonna be the loneliest)

summary -- in which you're in love with peter parker, only he's not in love with you. warnings -- fucking angst on top of angst. mentions character death (uncle ben and r's father), tiny not even bad explicit language, peter parker is lowkey an asshole in this authors note -- inspired by the lonelist by maneskin. proof read a little, not edited. gif not mine.

You had grown up next door to Peter Parker, he had been your best friend since the two of you were six years old and it hadn’t changed over the years. If you went digging through attics or basements, you’d find hundreds of pictures documenting two children growing up side-by-side into teenagers. The growth charts in the houses were faded now, but you could still make out initials and numbers, and smiley faces. A childhood spent so closely together, families practically weaved together. Peter Parker was part of you.

You’re not sure where along the line you’d fallen in love with him. Maybe as a ten year old when you’d finally learnt how to do the bunny loops to tie your shoelaces by yourself, and Peter spun the two of you around in circles in celebration. Maybe as a thirteen year old when you’d had your heart broken and Peter sat up with you all night to dry your tears. Or, maybe as a sixteen year old when you noticed the way he started looking at Gwen Stacey and you realised that Peter Parker was a boy you couldn’t have.

Now seniors at Midtown High School, you knew things were about to change drastically. Life revolved around homework, college applications, extra credit work, serious boyfriends, and making the most out of a school year that would be drawing to a close soon. Gone were the days of paper planes, skinned knees, hanging upside down until the two of you were red in the face. And, you’d be lying if you said it didn’t tear you up inside.

“Are you coming over tomorrow, Pete?” You asked on the walk home, sharing an earbud as you listened to the Peter + Y/n playlist, carefully curated over the years. The backpack you had since freshman year, splitting at the seams, was full of textbooks and homework, and you knew if you didn’t get it started tonight it was highly likely you’d procrastinate.

“Can’t, sorry bub.” Peter was nice enough to sound apologetic, and it hadn’t been the answer you’d been expecting. In the twelve years of friendship, you’d never not spent a Saturday together and it hurt you a little to know Peter was suddenly unavailable. “I can come over on Sunday though? We’ll start our assignment together.”

You shrugged in response, taking out the earbud as you reached your front steps. A quick goodbye was said before you ran up them and through the heavy front door, ignoring the way your backpack knocked against your back with enough force to leave bruises. Peter followed, stopping when the door slammed shut without enough time for him to slip through. Unsure if you wanted time alone or not, the boy decided it was perhaps better to leave you for now; he’d see you on Sunday.

Saturday was an incredibly boring day, for you anyway. You spent most of the day in a too-big sweater and some pj shorts, hunched over your desk as you worked through an English class essay. It felt weird not being with Peter, like something was missing and you wondered what he was doing. You wondered if he was lonely, wondered if Peter was doing anything even remotely close to exciting. You’d ask tomorrow, you decided.

Sunday rolled around, and you sat on the stairs outside your front door waiting for him to turn up, but he never did. Peter Parker, for all his lateness when it came to school, was never late for you. He had sworn against being late after he was five minutes late to your ninth birthday party, quite by accident, only to turn up and discover that nobody had come anyway; you’d been most hurt at the thought of Peter not being there.

“Come on love, dinner’s ready.” Your mom called you inside at 5pm, tea towel draped across her shoulder. You were silent as you stood and followed her, holding in all the heartbreak you were sure you’d cry into your pillow that night anyway. Peter had shown up during dinner, looking apologetic and peaky, and your mom served him some dinner and you had to pretend that his actions hadn’t cut deep inside.

Peter left after dinner, citing that his Aunt May needed help with something, and when you rounded the table for a hug, Peter didn’t stay long enough to give you the chance. Despite the action being unnecessary, you walked him to the front door and as it closed behind him, you collapsed onto the stair behind you and let yourself cry. Nothing needed to be said, the actions were enough, Peter Parker no longer saw you as a friend.

You took to ignoring him at school after that, much to his confusion. When his Uncle Ben passed away, you took Aunt May some condolence flowers and some prepared meals. “Mom said you’re welcome over anytime, which you know anyway.” You explained into a hug, feeling your own tears burn at your eyes. “She knows how you’re feeling, and said you don’t have to grieve alone. You’re not alone, Aunt May.”

A sympathetic smile sent in Peter’s direction before you stepped out of the Parker residence, unsure if you’d ever step back inside once again. Things had changed even more after that, Peter had become obsessed with avenging his Uncle’s death, fuelled by the need to catch his killer, and it was obvious that he didn’t have time for silly friendships anymore. Even if Peter Parker was still the biggest part of you.

When the seventh anniversary of your fathers passing rolled around, you found yourself crying in the arms of Aunt May. Your mom had gone to visit her mother in law for the weekend; her health had been declining in recent months, and having no other children, your mom figured it was only right for her to spend some time with her. You promised you’d be fine alone, said the Parkers were right next door if you needed them. And you did, more than ever. But where Peter failed, Aunt May succeeded.

“He should be here,” you wailed, tears coming thick and fast as you felt yourself breaking down. Peter had been there for every anniversary, every first since, and when you cried for your father, Peter had been the one to hold your hand, encouraging you to let it all out. “Peter should be here. Why isn’t he here? What could be more important?”

You’d fallen asleep on their couch that night, cheeks sticky from tears and throat raw from crying so hard. Eleven am saw you waking up to the sound of May lecturing Peter, “she needed you. You weren’t there when she needed you the most. Where were you, Peter? Where were you because you sure as hell weren’t here when it mattered the most?”

You had left when Peter Parker mumbled out that he was with Gwen Stacy; didn’t stay long enough for the apologies that you didn’t think you’d get to hear. But when Gwen’s father passed away, and Peter withdrew himself from the girl, Peter climbed through your window begging forgiveness.

“I waited for you that Sunday, and you didn’t come,” you cried, grateful your mom had been working a night shift at the local hospital. Peter could feel his heart crack at your tears, wanting to console you but moving felt impossible. “You came for dinner, and didn’t even hug me goodbye. You never leave without hugging me! And you weren’t there. When I needed you the most, you weren’t there.”

“I’m sorry,” Peter practically stumbled over his words, unsure if you’d believe him. He hoped you would, but he’d been such an awful friend to you lately that he wasn’t sure if you’d forgive him. Not that he’d blame you if you chose not to. “Believe me bub, I’m so so sorry. God, if I could turn back time I would, I’d spend every single second with you instead of with Gwen. I’d have held you whilst you cried instead of kissing Gwen. Believe me, I would have.”

Bile rose in your throat at the statement, and you swallowed it back down. You’d been in love with Peter for years now, he’d always been part of you. Twelve years of friendship; shared skinned knees, hanging upside down until you were red in the face, a silly marriage pact, tears, laughter. Peter had been your awkward first kiss aged fourteen when you worried that nobody would ever want to kiss you. You were so in love with your best friend, and wishful thinking had you hoping he loved you too.

“I love you,” you blurted out, unable to stop yourself. “I’ve loved you for longer than I think I can remember. Maybe I started loving you when we were ten and you twirled me around after I learnt to tie my shoelaces alone. Or maybe it started at thirteen when you stayed with me all night to dry my tears after that jerk broke my heart. Maybe at fourteen after you were my first kiss when I worried nobody would kiss me. It was confirmed at sixteen though, when you started looking at Gwen Stacy differently and I knew you were a boy that would never be mine.”

There, it was all out in the open now. A confession you could never take back, words you never thought you’d spill. Peter looked lost for words, opening and closing his mouth eerily like a fish as he tried to think of something to say. The right thing to say. The thing you wished he’d say more than anything: I love you too.

But he didn’t. Couldn’t. Instead, he turned and left your house. Leaving you alone for the last time ever.

Peter Parker will always be the saddest part of you. The part of you that would never be yours.

[andiwriteordie]

prompt! mike has been acting weird, sneaking off after school and spending his afternoon who knows where. will surely doesn’t know, but he fears this random behaviour is because will recently confessed his feelings and then told mike to not say anything and please remain as friends (afraid of rejection). turns out mike had been sneaking to gareth’s garage to learn will’s fav song in guitar for valentine’s day because if he is about to tell his best friend he feels the same way for him he WILL make a big deal about it. guitar is a lot harder to learn than he thought tho. if will ends up calling him a sap then all the better.

nic i hate you for this (i don't ugh) BECAUSE MIKE WITH A GUITAR. I'M YELLINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG.

—

2: know that i’m in love with you 

Mike is acting strange, and it’s all Will’s fault.

Yeah, so… if anyone asks, Will does not recommend accidentally confessing your feelings for your best friend of over ten years after a movie night not-date date for just the two of you. In Will’s defense, he had been considering telling Mike about this for a while now—after all, the two of them are seniors in high school and are planning to go to two different colleges this fall. It just feels right to close this chapter of Will’s life and confess his biggest secret, so he can leave high school and Hawkins behind without any regrets.

… 

Of course, the universe kind of hates Will, and in an ironic turn of events, it turns out that confessing his feelings to Mike is actually going to be Will’s biggest regret.

Because it’s been over a month now since Will finally told Mike about his feelings, and even though Mike had reassured him that this wouldn’t change their friendship, he has definitely been avoiding Will over this past month. 

Yes, Will is aware that he’s being a little paranoid. No, he doesn’t think he’s making this up.

Because Mike has just been gone this past month. Normally, he’s always trying to convince Will to come over and do homework with him, or inviting Will to hang out with him on the weekends, or even just texting Will on a near constant basis. But now, Mike almost always seems busy, and more than that, he’s downright dodgy. Anytime Will does try to initiate anything, Mike seems to have an excuse, and he gets awkward and flustered and basically runs away from the situation.

It’s great. It’s really, really great.

“You know he doesn’t actually hate you, right?” Max says dryly as the two of them walk down the hallways towards their lockers. 

“Pretty sure he does,” Will replies, giving his best friend a look. “He’s hardly spoken to me all month. He hates me.”

Max rolls her eyes. “It’s Mike,” she points out. “He’s literally incapable of hating you.”

“Okay, well, maybe he doesn’t hate me, but he definitely doesn’t want anything to do with me,” Will says, rolling his eyes back at her. “You know, since I just decided to fuck up our friendship of over ten years and make everything weird and shit, like an idiot.”

“You are an idiot,” Max says, and she very blatantly chooses to ignore the offended look that Will’s certain is on his face, “but not because you told Mike how you feel. You’ve been planning to tell Mike about your feelings for him for months now, and you did it. It’s not your fault that he’s an asshole who doesn’t know how to deal with his feelings.”

Will scrunches his nose at his best friend, and he stops at his locker, carefully fiddling with the lock and putting in his combination. “You make it sound a lot less complicated than it actually is,” he mutters. “Mike and I have been friends for practically our entire lives.”

“Which means you’ll work all this shit out, just like you always do,” Max says flatly, leaning against her locker. “And then Mike can stop looking at you like a kicked puppy begging for attention from his owner.”

Will raises a brow, narrowing his eyes at his best friend. “Mike doesn’t look at me like that.”

“Really?” Max raises a brow at him, an amused expression on her face. “‘Cause I’m looking at him right now, and he definitely looks just like that.”

Pure panic rises in Will’s heart, and he turns around quickly. Sure enough, none other than Mike Wheeler is walking down the hallway—directly towards Max and Will himself. He looks good today, dressed in a pair of ripped black jeans, some retro t-shirt Will’s fairly certain he found when El made the Party go thrifting with her, his favorite pair of Converse, and his classic denim jacket. 

Will’s heart does a nervous, fluttering thing, and his cheeks go warm as Mike catches his eye. A slow, shy smile forms on Mike’s face, and he lifts his hand in a tiny wave.

“Oh my God,” Max mutters under her breath. “You guys are fucking ridiculous.”

Will shoots his best friend a glare, before turning back around and smiling awkwardly at Mike. “Hey, Mike,” he greets, waving slightly. 

“Hey, Will,” Mike says, a bit breathless. “Hey, Max.”

Max merely nods back at him, and Will rubs the back of his neck awkwardly. “How’s it going?” he asks and immediately thinks about kicking himself. Or maybe throwing himself into one of the massive snow piles out in the parking lot. Nobody would ever find him in there, which is great.

“It’s… it’s going,” Mike says, just as awkward. Behind him, Will hears the sound of Max’s palm hitting her forehead, and he fights the urge to flip her off. “Hey, uh… are you busy right now?”

Technically, Will is busy, and he’s not really sure that skipping his Calculus class is the best idea. But this is the first time Mike has reached out to him in literally a month, so Calculus be damned. It’s not like Will’s ever actually going to use this shit.

“No, no, I’m free,” Will says breathlessly. Max huffs out a little laugh behind him, and this time, Will does actually flip her off. “What’s up?”

A shy smile forms on Mike’s lips. “It’s um… well, it’s a surprise,” he says awkwardly. “I just… wanted to show you something, if that’s okay.”

There’s a rosy little blush on Mike’s cheeks, and Will can’t help but smile. “Of course,” Will says softly, and Mike smiles again, clearly relieved.

“Cool,” he breathes, then motions for Will to follow him down the hallway. “Come on, it’s not too far away.”

Will nods silently, and he follows Mike through the crowded hallways. Distantly, he hears Max call, “Okay, bye! Nice talking to you too!”

Woops. He’ll have to catch up with her later.

Eventually, Mike stops in front of a classroom near the back of their school, and he turns around to face Will, a nervous look on his face. “Okay, so… promise you won’t laugh,” he says with a bit of a wince. 

Will raises a brow. “Why would I laugh?” he asks suspiciously.

He gets an awkward laugh in response. “Because I only had like a month to put this together,” Mike admits sheepishly, and he opens the door slightly. “But I, um… I wanted to make sure I did this today, so… you know… today’s special and stuff.”

Will just blinks, and as he follows Mike into the empty music classroom, he wracks his brain, trying to think of why today is important. Other than the fact that it’s Valentine’s Day, Will can’t think of anything.

…

Surely, Mike can’t mean that, can he?

“Okay,” Mike says, taking a deep breath and turning around to look at Will. There’s a shy smile on his face, and he shrugs helplessly. “So, I, um… I’ve been thinking, right? About… about what you said… the other night.”

He doesn’t say anything else, but he doesn’t have to. Will knows exactly what night Mike is talking about, and he can’t help but wince, his cheeks going warm.

“Mike—” Will starts to say, but Mike holds out his hands placatingly.

“Not in a bad way!” Mike reassures quickly. “I mean, not like… well… I just…” His voice trails off, and he groans, running a hand through his hair, before deciding on, “Just, sit down please. It’ll make more sense in a second. I think. God, I hope.”

Once again, Will just blinks, and he stares at his best friend, trying desperately to understand what the hell is going on here. “Um… okay,” he says and hesitantly takes a seat on one of the metal chairs in the middle of the music room. 

A relieved smile forms on Mike’s face, and he takes a deep breath, looking around the music room. Finally, his eyes land on a guitar sitting on a stand, and he reaches for it, carefully slipping the strap over his shoulder and sitting down in a chair across from Will.

“You remember when I tried to learn how to play the guitar freshman year?” Mike says softly, and all Will can do is nod dumbly and stare at his best friend in surprise. “Well, I, um… I’ve been trying to learn how to play again… this past month, I mean. Gareth’s been teaching me after school. And that’s why I haven’t… really been around?”

A self-deprecating little laugh escapes Mike’s lips. “Turns out playing the guitar is really fucking hard,” he admits. “And also I think my calluses have calluses, Will.”

Will can’t help but laugh, and Mike beams, the redness on his cheeks growing. “I’m not that good at this, but I wanted to at least try,” he says, softer now. “‘Cause… well… I just wanted to make you smile… and I know this is one of your favorite songs ‘cause Jonathan got you hooked on eighties rock and stuff… So, I hope I don’t accidentally make you hate The Cure.”

“Never,” Will says with a laugh, and Mike laughs with him, ducking his head. “It’s The Cure, and… it’s you. I could never hate either of you.”

Mike’s cheeks turn even redder—probably as red as Will’s own face right now—and he smiles again. “Cool,” he whispers. “I guess, um… I guess here goes nothing then.”

…

Absolutely nothing could have prepared Will for just what watching and listening to his childhood best friend and crush play one of his favorite songs on the guitar would do to him.

But Mike starts playing Just Like Heaven by The Cure, and all rational thought leaves Will’s mind and heart, and holy shit, holy shit, holy shit, Will just wants to kiss him. He wants to grab Mike by the collar of his silly little denim jacket and pull him close and never let him go and kiss him—which is nothing new, but is only amplified by the fact that Mike is playing one of his favorite songs right now.

His brow is furrowed in concentration, and he keeps glancing up at Will, a hesitant and shy look on his face. The quiet raspiness of Mike’s voice is absolutely perfect for the song, and everything about this moment takes Will’s breath away. He thinks he could stay here forever, frozen in this moment for just the two of them.

And when Mike looks up at him and softly starts singing, “Why won’t you ever know that I’m in love with you? That I’m in love with you,” it feels as though the world shrinks and shrinks and shrinks down until it’s just the two of them here. 

I love you, Will thinks to himself, and he smiles at Mike, unable to hold back the tears that sting his eyes. I love you too.

A smile forms on Mike’s face, and he glances down, still carefully plucking at the strings. The rest of the song comes easily to him, and honest to God, for someone who really just learned how to play the guitar this month, Mike is pretty damn good. 

(Will files that away in the back of his mind under the list of things that he loves about Mike Wheeler. He also makes a mental note to ask Mike to learn as many of Will’s favorite songs as possible. Just because.)

Finally, the song comes to an end, and Mike takes a deep breath, looking up and meeting Will’s eyes. “Was that okay—” he starts to say, but he never gets the chance to finish his sentence.

Because before he can, Will all but lunges for him, and he throws all caution to the wind, and he decides, fuck it, this is Mike, and Will knows Mike, and Will loves Mike, and Mike loves Will enough to learn how to play his favorite fucking song on the guitar and sing it for him.

Mike makes a surprised little noise as Will’s lips crash into his, and he nearly tips backwards in his chair. Somehow, the two of them don’t end up falling onto the ground, and as soon as he recovers, Mike wraps his arms around Will, pulling him close. He kisses Will back with just as much fervor and desperation, and Will feels him smile into the kiss.

“I take it you liked the song?” Mike mumbles. 

“I loved it,” Will corrects, pulling back enough to smile at his best friend. "Sap."

A satisfied and also relieved look forms on Mike’s face. “Cool,” he says breathlessly. “Cool, ‘cause… well… I really, really like you, if um… if that wasn’t obvious from the song, and I—”

Will cuts him off by tugging on the collar of Mike’s jacket and pulling him in for another kiss. “It wasn’t obvious,” he whispers, a bit teasing. “But I know how you could show me.”

Mike’s lips quirk up into a little grin, and he moves the guitar aside, pulling Will close. “Oh yeah?” he whispers back. “And how’s that?”

Will just grins back at him, and he leans forward, kissing Mike again—soft and slow—and murmuring, “Just like this.”

Just like heaven.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

HIIII!!!!!!!!

I LOVE your human au and would be delighted If you could expound on Wally's relationship with the cast and how he views/ is viewed by others <3

I hope you have a good day/ night whenever you are and I wish your pillow always be cold 🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️

ofc! i've been thinking about it a lot!

i would like to begin by saying that, as with canon, everyone likes Wally. as they should! i think that's an Important tidbit that should always carry across, at least in some way

Wally is... i think it's also important that he's a kind person. he loves deeply, is very forgiving and accepting, and he's just. he's a bizarre little man, and he's wonderful! there is not a malicious bone in his body! he finds delight & beauty in everything he can. he looks at his friends and is filled with deep contentment and joy and love. he's not blind to their flaws (and certainly not his own), but he never minds. those flaws are part of his friends, and he loves every bit of them!

and ok. Wally is not nearly as naive in this au as he is in canon. bc he's had a different life! he's had a rough go of it! unfortunately there's next to no way for normal people to grow up completely innocent & naive & pure, yk? life is harsh. Wally is not spared. he's incredibly kind despite it all. he's still in love with life and humanity. he smiles at strangers in the street & stops to watch bees pollinate flowers & sees parts of his friends in everything. he has many intense feelings even if he doesn't really show it or know how to convey them! he believes in the inherent goodness of people & beauty of being human!

there is a... very wide range of how people (outside of the Neighbors) view Wally. a lot of people find him slightly unsettling and really fucking weird, and well. he is! he's strange, and it's a wonderful part of him! but many don't see it that way. so he was ostracized by his peers in school (all the way through college), his coworkers (the few times he held a job before becoming a full-time artist), and most people in his local community. they just don't get him. they don't See him. Wally doesn't mind all that much! all of the important people in his life accept and love him for who he is, and he wouldn't even think of changing to fit the mold others want to shove him into.

then of course there are the people who treat him like a child, bc ableism is a thing and Wally's very noticeably autistic (even if people only notice subconsciously). this i think would be one of the very few things that outright annoys Wally, even if he doesn't really show it. but then there's the people who, while they might not get him (especially not to the extent his friends do), they accept him. like much of the art community he's involved in - even if a lot of them completely misinterpret his personality / mannerisms. they're all like "ohhhh he's so mysterious and ruminant" that's the 'tism, babes

BUT! YOU ASKED ABOUT SPECIFICALLY HIM AND THE NEIGHBORS! we'll save Barnaby for last since that's. uh. i have a lot to say about it. it's Very Complex in my mind

collectively, all of them love Wally a lot. which i've said! We Know! they also (mostly subconsciously) look for his approval - he's got a certain level of charisma that makes them all want him to like them. which, he does. obviously. unconditionally. and they're all protective of him & very patient with him. i think that's both a result of his natural rizz, how kind & patient he is with them, how well they understand him, and how he's a pacifist. he's their guy and woe befall anyone who dares cross him. (essentially, all of them collectively: the only constant is suffering - omg Wally!!! 💖💖💖)

we'll start with Frank! before he got to know Wally, he thought that Wally was an aloof asshole who thought he was better than everyone. then they started to directly interact and Frank realized "oh you're literally the nicest person i've ever met & also surprisingly relatable. you're just like me fr'. did he have a lil crush on Wally? yes. im saying it now literally everyone in the friend group (except local lesbians poppy & sally) has had at least a teensy crush on Wally at some point. but Frank deeply appreciates Wally's company & his complete lack of judgement. and how he gladly will let Frank talk for hours on end, chiming in with questions to prompt him to talk more! he also appreciates Wally's calm demeanor and vibes. he's one of those people that even when overwhelmed, Frank can handle having Wally around. he's like a human capybara! if Frank needs/wants a buddy with him for Situations, his go-to (after Julie ofc, though depending on the situation he'd pick Wally first) is Wally, since Wally Gets It. also Wally is unafraid to be like "wow, this kinda sucks! we're leaving", thus giving Frank an easy out. they just get along very well! ofc Frank can get frustrated with Wally, but then again he gets frustrated w/ everyone. but since Wally is patient with him, Frank tries to return the favor. also he's gotten into several fistfights over Wally's honor

Julie! she loves Wally so fucking much! he's her lil guy! even if he's kinda boring in a way! he's not very good at games or sports & would rather go on a relaxing walk than play Just Dance, but hey! he always makes Attempts, and she appreciates that! when they were younger and Julie & Sally & Poppy had girls nights (they continue to have girls' nights but everyone is involved. they still call it that tho), they'd often include Wally bc, yk! he's chill like that! Julie also massively respects his ability to say "no thank you" to anything without compromise. if he ever says it to her, she knows that he doesn't mean Any ill will by it! there's a sort of comfort in that! she knows she can be herself around him! also he's just... very good company. he's a shoulder to cry on, a hand to hold, a willing victim & confidante for elaborate schemes! he visits her at work Purely because he knows it delights her to see a friendly face in the middle of a grueling shift! he's always been a bit of a lighthouse to her!

and while Sally can be a little exasperated with how literal Wally is, she finds no small amount of solidarity with him As A Fellow Artist. when they first became friends, they caught on like a house on fire! she mentioned the artistic side of theater, and Wally was immediately on board. then and going forward Wally is always willing and more than happy to assist with painting sets, art advertisements for her performances, etc! they have little brainstorming sessions where she rambles about what she wants sets / costumes to look like, and Wally sketches them out! since Sally was a theater kid and goes on to work in that department (locally, usually), Wally often gets first read of her scripts. Sally highly values Wally's opinion and input. if he's free, sometimes he helps teach the actors' the show choreography. Sally runs through it with him, Wally soaks up the moves like a sponge & memorizes them, and hey! he loves to teach! Sally just. she loves him a lot. they're both artists of a sophisticated nature <3

Howdy thinks Wally is real neat! Wally is good company and is (often unintentionally) hilarious! he's also like... the one person Howdy refuses to scam in any way shape or form. tricking grandmas into buying more than they need? no sweat. tricking Wally into spending slightly more money than intended? Howdy feels like a fucking monster. but yeah, Howdy's just always delighted to see Wally! he likes Wally's unique view of the world and often takes it into consideration when making decisions. when he's stuck on something, he thinks WWWD (what would Wally do!). Howdy also is the one who most often accompanies Wally to his art shows & the like, bc he knows that Wally will accept the first price offer he hears - and Howdy is determined that his incredible works of art are paid for their worth! nobody is gotta cheat his pal outta a single cent! he just likes having Wally around, you know?

Wally & Poppy have an interesting relationship, i think! he tells the cashier "she asked for no pickles" for her! she makes sure he always has a soft place to land! he kinda confuses her, but she finds it endearing in a way? he displays a personality/behavioral quirk and she's like "oh. well alright!" and rolls with it very gracefully. they appreciate each other's mellow demeanor and proclivity for peace. Poppy knows she can always have a nice, quiet conversation with him over tea (even if he doesn't drink it!). and he's always willing to help with anything and everything she needs, no question. i think i've made this joke on this blog before but! in way! he's her emotional support animal lmao. a hand to squeeze to death on an airplane! also it's funny for me to picture a 6'8 woman hunched behind this 5'2 shrimp of a man as if he can hide her

it takes a little bit for Eddie to adjust to Wally's bizarre nature! like i've said, Eddie connects with the group when they're all in their late 20s. he hasn't had over a decade of being friends with Wally like the rest of them. he likes Wally plenty! definitely grows to love him! but it's an adjustment. Wally consistently startles him very easily (Wally is naturally quiet and has a habit of appearing out of nowhere), and Eddie has a hard time getting a read on him. most people do! and also Wally is very handsome/pretty, and that throws Eddie off a bit (it's hard to think when someone so attractive is staring directly into your eyes without blinking) but once he gets somewhat used to Wally & understands as much as he can, he very much appreciates Wally's company & friendship! they find (somewhat subconscious) solidarity in being the kindest and most helpful people in the clique! and Wally is a wonderful island of peace in a turbulent world. Eddie never minds sitting with him for a cup of coffee in the early morning during his route, even if it means his workday ends a few minutes later than usual.

other supporting cast like Wally as well. Ms. Beagle kinda views him as a second son! the Joyful siblings will always find him a little weird and unsettling, but they're nice enough to him. Howdy's family thinks he's neat. etc! but lets talk about Barnaby!

Wally is literally everything to Barnaby. that's his person. there is literally no one that comes before Wally in his eyes and heart. their relationship is and always has been very nontraditional To Me (in this au and somewhat how i view them overall! its complicated!). Wally never subscribed to or understood societal norms, and as a result, Barnaby wound up pretty much shunning them as well when it comes to his lil buddy. their relationship isn't romantic - Wally is very aro and Barnaby just does not feel that way about him, not really. but at the same time it's certainly not entirely platonic!

neither of them can imagine being separated. they met in 7th grade and have been glued together ever since. they've been through some tough shit together! they know each other better than anyone! you cannot have one without the other! they're more than a package deal - they're Inseparable! Barnaby has had many a nightmare of Wally leaving in one way or another, and it scares him more than anything. to him, he can weather any storm as long as Wally is by his side. they obviously don't spend every moment together, but at the end of the day they always come home to each other.

Barnaby just... he loves and respects and values Wally so much. he wants his approval, his attention, his company. sometimes he scares himself by considering the lengths he'd go to for Wally. there is no one he's more comfortable with or feels he understands / is understood by. if somebody has a problem with Wally, they have a problem with Barnaby. if Wally jumped off a cliff, Barnaby would not hesitate to leap after him! Wally says jump, Barnaby asks how high! he's not a violent person at all, but teen Barnaby once broke a bully's jaw for goin' a little too far w/ Wally

is their relationship a smidge unhealthy? a lil codependent? yes <3 yes it is <3 but we all know that Wally would never use this against Barnaby. on his side of the coin, Barnaby is his person as well! Wally has never imagined his life without Barnaby because it just does not occur to him that that's a possibility. there are many things that only Barnaby knows about Wally, sides only he's seen. there's complete & unconditional trust/love between them. they hotbox Home together <3

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for breaking up with my boyfriend?

I (32F) broke up with my boyfriend Jack (30M) a few months ago over a couple Issues I've been dealing with: I found out I have a degenerative issue with my eyes and will be going blind, and his dad hates me for being as he quotes "fat, uneducated, and bad with jobs". Note: I am infact obese, I do not have a college degree, and had lost my job 3 times in a row in 6mos before I hit the stable job I'm at now, due to mental breakdowns at work.

Jack has lived with his parents his whole life, and revers them greatly. However I can tell he's going through the same thing I did with my parents- Where they prioritized him getting good grades over his mental health, he constantly apologizes and thinks I will hate and abandon him over very simple things, he rather delve in games than face his problems, because he thinks he is comfortable when it's very much making him feel worse.

I cut contact with my parents 3 years ago for these exact same reasons- They were overbearing, abusive, and without another way to say it: extremely catholic. Because I was financially dependent on them and didn't know any better, I thought I could live with them as an adult because of how expensive housing is where we live.

Eventually I had to start getting therapy because I would have meltdowns so often in school, and found out it was the way that my parents treated me when I was younger, and that I have AuDHD- something my parents denied as me being too stupid and lazy to do anything after high school.I got on medication and though my ADHD improved, i had to continue therapy due to my Autism now having more time to focus and overwhelm me and having to learn to unmask. I've been told my personality did a 180 over this from peers that hadn't seen me pre-pandemic, but I'm happier now, and eventually found a way to move away from my parents and living with my Uncle instead, who instead of belittling me is encouraging my therapy.

I am explaining this, because Jack does the same things I do- he's almost the exact same as I was with my parentls. He has constant meltdowns and spirals, he thinks he's worthless because of the way his Mom and Dad treats him, yet he keeps putting his parents on a pedestal. It's because we seemed to grow up in the same kinds of environment that we bonded and eventually started dating last year.

Us openly dating did not last long, though, because when he introduced me to his parents they immedietely did not like me. They did not like that I wanted to help with dinner, or refuse eating chicken, because Jack is severely allergic to it. They also did not like that I wanted to clean the table and kept sidelooking at me whever we talked.

Because of this simple lunch, for months, they pressured him to break up with me but he wouldn't. He said he loves me as I am, and his parents are just stupid. We even had to start keeping the relationship secret, because his parents would harass him for coming to just pick me up, or meet me at a tennis court so we would play a game or two. His parents can track him through his car, so they always knew where he was.

I told him what I had to do to leave my parents house, but he said it's too hard to do that. My Uncle was sympathetic about this and even discussed with him to move into our house, but he refused that too.

Last month, I went to a vision doctor due to headaches and blurrier than usual vision, and found out that I would be losing my eyesight due to something going on within my eyes. Its extremely stressful for me, and dealing with that, and the constant harassment from Jacks parents, I got very tired. it was getting to the point where he couldnt go out without his parents yelling at him about me for something, we only hung out for once day per month. I didn't want to give them something else to yell about me at him, and I felt it would ease his stress because they would stop bothering him. And, though it seems weird, I hoped it make him uncomfortable enough to do something for himself. So I ended up breaking up with him.

It has really hurt to do this to him- He's someone I love dearly, and he's taken it way harder than I thought. He won't listen to me, But. He does listen to his friends- it's how he asked me out, and at least try out therapy, his friends hyped him up about it so he did it. I feel if his friends help him realize what he needs to do, he'll be more inclined to help himself than me just telling him. And if not, his friends are still there to back him up than me staying near him and having his parents harass him about it.

His friends are mad at me though, and told me I should have just put up with his parents, because in the end I am in love with him and that I actually made the whole situation worse, because he has loss motivation. Even though I am still talking to him and still there for him alongside his friends- I just make myself scarce so his parents don't know we talk. Am I the asshole?

What are these acronyms?

[holocene-sims]

next // previous

august 25, 2021 9:00 p.m. seoul

**TW: SUICIDE MENTION**

[grant] hey, not to bring up the previous conversation, but uh, i wanted to say i'm sorry you had to deal with me the same year you were going through so much. it wasn't fair.

[henry] it's okay, grant. i don't think your motivation for being an addict and attempting suicide that year was, "yeah, fuck henry, i want to make his life so much worse right now. his dad's dead, he may not have enough credits to get his degree this may, and now me!"

[grant] it doesn't matter what it was. the fact is that my problems hurt other people. i didn't just harm myself. and i was not a pleasant person that last year when you really needed pleasantry.

[henry] yeah, i'm not going to lie to you, that very last year of college, i thought the version of you i knew and loved was gone.

[grant] i was insufferable.

[henry] correct. you were an asshole.

[henry] for the most part. you did try to be good again and be there for me when my dad died.

[henry] it was weird. i hadn't seen you sober in years, but when i called you for the first time in a few weeks because there was no one else besides soobin i wanted to talk to about my dad dying, you showed up to my place kind of normal again.

[henry] i don't want to say "sober" because you probably weren't, but you were at least on fewer substances than i was used to at the time, so you seemed sober.

[henry] you weren't in a place to show up for people long-term because you were suffering, too, but you tried. you checked on me every day for a few weeks until finals hit and everything got crazy for everyone. well, no, until we threw that intervention for you right before finals. nonetheless, i appreciated the effort.

[henry] it stopped me from cutting you out, so there's that.

[henry] i'm not trying to sound rude either, please don't take it that way. it was just a lot. i would have regretted it if i cut you out, and i didn't want to at my core because i do not want to do life without you, but i didn't think you had it in you to get out of that spiral you were in for years. i really did not. i thought you were done for.

[henry] i'm sensitive, even if i never sound like it. i was mad at you for bad behavior, but i was also, um, really sad to see you like that. i love you. i've loved you as a brother and a best friend for almost my entire life. and i did not think i could stomach watching you die at your own hand. it made me sick.

[henry] and it probably makes me a bad friend to have felt that way. one, to have thought about cutting you out, and two, to have had so little faith left in you. you deserved more faith from me. if the roles were reversed, you'd never give up on me.

[grant] don't say that. everyone has their limit, and it's hard to know where it is until you finally hit it. i would have one, too.

[grant] and man, you were meant to feel that way. i meant it when i told you i pushed people away purposely.

[grant] whatever conscience and consciousness i had during that time always reminded me that i was terrified of hurting other people. i was very well aware i was probably causing, like, terrible amounts of pain to my friends and family, and i didn't want to do more damage when i killed myself, so...

[grant] yeah, i always meant to kill myself. i thought about it every day for years, honestly all the way back into high school, and i got super close to trying it about a billion times, but i only ever went through with any of my plans once.

[grant] and i'll regret for the rest of my life that you and my grandparents had to see what i did to myself on graduation night.

[grant] but anyway, i chose to have those awful behaviors because i felt like if i ran everybody off and made them leave, they'd be glad i was dead and wouldn't hate me for what i did and just forget me.

[grant] terrible, terrible strategy! like holy shit! i also entirely regret acting out like that, the much happier and stable version of myself from the last, like, eight years realizes that made everything worse and wouldn't have fixed anything anyway.

[grant] trying not to hurt people by hurting them upfront is a fucked up strategy. just entirely fucked up and counterintuitive.

[henry] no, it wouldn't have worked. you'd have left everyone traumatized by not being able to repair things with you.

[henry] so, whether you like it or not, people do like you. people tend to really, really like you. you have a very magnetic, charming personality that very few other people in the world share.

[henry] and people do want you around. i want you around.

[henry] i know what i just said, but i really do want you around.

[henry] but also, wow. i guess you did a great job at trying to run us off since it almost worked on me.

[grant] it was easier than acknowledging people care about me or worry about me. i'm not good at that.

[grant] oh, and in those rare early moments where i thought that i needed help, i was scared everyone would only ever see me as a fucked up shell of a human being. like if i got better, i would still be reduced to the guy with problems.

[grant] i'm glad that i regret trying to kill myself. there's a lot i would have missed out on, including the chance to be nice to myself. but i do worry that some of those things are true, that fucked up is the only way people see me, even strangers.

[grant] i feel like glass sometimes. like everyone looks through me and sees the worst in me and only the worst.

[henry] i'm sorry you feel that way.

[henry] it's a little ironic, though. the more you hold back from telling your loved ones these things or try to push us away so we never see you struggling with anything ever, the more we worry you have the same exact problems that almost killed you before.

[grant] i've really backed myself into a corner, eh?

[henry] there's about a million things i could respond to that with, but here's the most important one. you're worth worrying about.

[henry] you spend your life looking after people and telling everyone to care about others, like you just told me to worry about my future kids, but you seriously do not believe you deserve that in return, and i don't get it. no, i do, but i don't.

[henry] yes, your parents taught you that you don't deserve love, but then again...

[grant] i'm trying to believe. and i have gotten at least a little better. my birthday, you know? i handled that pretty well.

[henry] everyone has flaws. we could and should try harder to not emphasize yours so much. but i don't see those flaws first. and if i do think about them, it's because i don't want them to take you away.

[henry] you don't see my flaws first, do you? clearly, you don't. right? you don't act like you see them.

[henry] the person i see you as is the kid who became friends with me two decades ago. some random nice kid who approached the one new kid at the park sitting by himself and played with him even though they couldn't talk to each other yet. some random kid who learned the basics of my language on the internet to write me a sweet letter saying, "hi, i'm grant, i'm six years old, and i want to be your friend." it didn't even matter it was written poorly.

[henry] i see a lot of good things in you. remember, i was just telling everyone about how nice you were to help me save the first dinner i hosted for soobin. a day ago, you helped me get over failure, one of my lifelong biggest fears, for an hour or two.

[henry] but i think our beginning sums you up nicely. i don't know anyone else who would have gone to such lengths for some nobody new kid. you didn't owe me your time or your respect and yet you gave it to me. and that was a weird time in my life. everything turned upside down when i moved. to have a friend like you then was...

[henry] and of course, nothing's changed. you're still a kind person. you're funny. you're smart. you're just you. you're one of the only people on earth who isn't fake. the kid i remember isn't gone. i'm glad he survived. i'm glad i didn't lose him.

[grant] despite everything, it's still me?

[henry] yes. but so we're clear, you don't have to do nice things to be worthy of being liked. you're likable on your own. i'm only saying that your kindness stands out to me, and i know that you value that trait, so it bears mentioning. you've been very good to me. i can forgive the times when you weren't. i've been a jackass before, too. i've probably been a jackass to you.

[grant] i feel like we've said thanks a lot today but thanks for sticking with me. don't feel bad that you thought i couldn't get better. that was my fault. but you're still here. and you showed up on graduation night for me. i'm beyond sorry that you had to see any of that, like i cannot repent or apologize enough in my lifetime, but thank you.

[grant] i owe you my life.

[grant] i owe you a lot but that first.

[grant] i've said it before but it should be repeated, you know? i definitely would have died if you didn't come that night. aside from my uncle, you're the only one i know who can pick a lock.

[henry] just do not make me do it again. i would show up a second time, but it would be better on my psyche if that was unnecessary.

[grant] it won't happen again. i've been good for a long time, but i'm great now and most of all, appropriately medicated for bipolar disorder. it's all going to be okay.

[grant] we're going to go home, continue being best friends forever, you're going to be a great dad one day.

[henry] and you will get your job back!

[grant] great minds think alike! now, how much longer until the arcade? i promise i'll let you win a game of air hockey for once.

[cqthqrtic]

you adored me before.

dazai osamu x reader.

content warnings: angst, implications of a legal age difference and difference of maturity (but nothing weird), dazai’s an asshole.

a/n: i thought of this while riding the bus and listening to good looking by suki waterhouse. reader is 19 and dazai is his canon age of 22. i often think about dazai getting with someone younger (obvi in a non-pedophilic way) bc i’m curious how he would perceive the difference in maturity and experience. anyways enjoy! sorry for the lack of content, college is kicking my ass :’)

Dazai looks at you with a blank stare, his eyes like an abyss calling you to drown in him. You were so arrogant to believe that you could tie him down. That you could uncover every secret he kept hidden away.

“You’re rather cold today,” you say. Your voice is meek and you can no longer bring yourself to look at his face. He smiles in a way that doesn’t reach his eyes. It feels like the smile of a snake.

“It is snowing outside,” he replies without skipping a beat. Dazai always has to have the last word. You aren’t sure if it’s an attractive trait anymore.

“You know that’s not what I meant,” you mutter under your breath. He laughs, it sounds almost like a cough but not quite. You click your tongue.

“I don’t like it when you’re being obtuse on purpose,” you tell him. He sighs.

“This is getting bothersome. It’s snowing outside and it’s getting late. Shouldn’t we both be heading home? You know it isn’t like me to stay after work,” he whines. You stare at him. His expression is seemingly relaxed even though you know he’s on guard. For what reason? You only have the faintest idea. You begin to put on your coat.

“You know, I really thought you adored me before. I thought I could uncover your secrets, get you to open up even,” you tell him, laughing a bit towards the end. “But the more I learn, the more things gets hazy. You’ve got a lot of secrets, Dazai. More than I have arrogance or patience for.”

His face turns pensive as he leans against the back of his chair. He stares at the ceiling and sighs before turning his gaze to you.

“I did like you a lot, but you and I both know that it wasn’t going to work out. I told you what kind of man I am, (Y/N). You’re not an exception,” he drawls. You swallow the forming lump in your throat. You hope your voice won’t crack, that would be humiliating.

“Yeah,” you whisper. Your vision blurs from the tears building up. You won’t cry. Not in front of him.

You’re slow to wrap your scarf around your neck, unable to stop your hands from shaking. You hear him stand up from his chair. Dazai grabs your shoulder and turns you to face him. He gently removes your hands from your scarf, allowing your arms to hang at your sides. He wraps your scarf around your neck for you. He moves your hair away from your face and neck, each touch gentle as though you're made of glass.

“I can’t help but wonder what I could have done to change things,” you whisper before sniffling. You lift your head up to meet his gaze. His hand cradles your face and his thumb strokes your cheek.

“Maybe if I was older, maybe if I was more mature, maybe something could have worked out between us,” you say. Your voice cracks and your cheeks feel aflame.

“There was nothing that you could have done to prevent this. You’re young and you will find better,” he says with a low voice. You find the kindness ironic as it may be the cruelest thing he could do in this moment. Dazai embraces you and presses his lips against your temple. Were his lips always this cold?

Your arms weakly wrap around his waist and you grip his coat in your fists. You feel so small in his arms. So foolish.

“It will pass. All of it; your feelings, the memories. In ten years, I’ll be a memory,” he says, before pausing and letting out an airy chuckle. “Maybe you won’t even remember my name.”

You let out a muffled sob against his chest. He gently shushes you, drawing circles with his thumb on your back.

“You’re cruel,” you cry. “You’re so cruel.”

He hums.

“I am,” Dazai says. “Which is why you have to move on from me and find something the complete opposite of me.”

You sniffle once more and peek your head out to look up. Your face feels puffy. Dazai stares down at you with an expression you can only describe as passive.

“I love you, Osamu,” you tell him. You tuck your head against his chest and tighten your grip around his waist. He tenses up at your words and frowns.

“You don’t know me enough to love me,” he tells you, almost sternly. He grabs your face and forces you to look at him again. "I'm a lost cause and you need to do whatever you can to move on from me."

He brushes your hair back with his hand.

“Have a good Christmas Eve, (Y/N),” Dazai tells you. His eyes bore into yours and you nod, the tears streaming down your face even more.

Dazai gives you a final parting gift, a gentle kiss on the lips that seems to last a lifetime but ends all too soon.

He separates himself from you, walking out of the room to leave you by your lonesome.

After he leaves, you watch him walk down the street blanketed in snow from the window.

He disappears into the winter night moments later. You watch the snowfall alone in the dark office, the scent of his favorite sake lingering on your scarf.