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yoonia · 9 months

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Chance Encounter | 06

⟶ Title | Chance Encounter

⟶ Summary | Sometimes your fangirling can cause you a lot of problems. Add alcohol and your clumsy thumb into the mix, followed by waking up to an accidental DM getting sent on Instagram, and your life changes forever. The entire mess leads you to an odd form of friendship with the man who you had always admired. But what happens when your two worlds collide, blurring the lines between reality and dreams? Will you be able to return to your real-life once this is over?

⟶ Author's note | It's finally here! After a long wait, I have finally returned with this story. I think this would be the perfect time to reveal the reason why I haven't been updating this series in a while and that is...*drum roll*...because google docs lost the entire files for the rest of the chapters lol I'm back, though, and I have every intention to finish this series because I still have a ton of ideas to share featuring this amazing man. I hope you'll enjoy this chapter!

Chapter Six

“Are you guys still at the mall? Seriously, did you have to take so long to pick your—bathing suit?”

Pressing your hand on your mouth, you muffle the sound of your laughter while Christian continues fuming on the other side of the call. “Bathing suit? Damn, you sound older than Momo’s Dad,” you almost choke as you tease him, unable to stop yourself from laughing.

“Okay, bikini, swimsuit, whatever,” he says, grumbling on the phone, causing you to laugh harder.

“It’s not that we lost track of time because of the bikinis,” you answer him with your voice lowered, not wanting to draw any more attention from the people roaming around you when you had already drawn enough eyes on you just by giggling to yourself. Having people glancing your way is already making you feel uncomfortable enough, even more so when it feels like you are hiding a big secret from the world and you have an irrational fear of getting caught growing on you.

Speaking to Christian like this makes you feel that way. It feels like you are keeping an important secret from the world. Although you have to admit that this is exactly what he is—a wonderful secret that you want to keep to yourself for a bit longer.

Thinking about this puts a smile on your face. One that stays with you when you cheerfully add, “We just had a little detour while shopping, that’s all. We’ll be back on track and finish things up in no time.”

Just as you are saying these words to him, you cast a glance towards the other side of the store where you currently are. There, you see Momo leaning over one of the glass showcases lined inside the store with rapt attention, eyes glowing over the collection of expensive branded watches lined up properly on display. Right beside her, Em is basically doing the same, and it is almost comical to see their expressions mirroring one another, with the bright lights coming out of the glass display reflecting on their faces to make them shine. And neither of them is even bothered by it, too mesmerised by the flashy collection that they have been eyeing on.

“Is ‘detour’ a code word for saying that you guys are getting carried away at the mall? You’re not trying to buy everything you see on display, are you?” Christian speaks on the phone again, and you are forced to stifle your laughter as you listen to what he is saying. Even without seeing him, you can already picture his pouty face and the curious frown that he normally gives you when he is trying to understand something that he couldn’t get a good grasp on, which often happens when you share some of the things that you do when you are not with him. You turn to look at the watch counter, watching silently as Momo is helping Em choose between a couple of watches that the storekeeper has personally picked out for them.

“No, it’s an actual detour. We sort of encountered some kind of—distraction.” A smile comes to your face when you recall what had happened. To remember the reason why you and Momo had ended up in the exclusive watch store with Em, the last person on earth that you would expect to be hanging out with.

It was quite awkward at first to have Em join your shopping date, when you barely knew anything about her except for what you have learned through the few cordial encounters you had with her, especially after the cryptic comment she made about the gift she is looking for.

But you are thankful that you had Momo here with you today, as she managed to defuse the situation, knowing exactly well about your habit to overthink and worry about the things that you don’t fully understand. Once Momo jumped in to break the ice, you finally gained enough information to not be as wary as you were when you first met Em earlier.

“What kind of gift are you thinking of getting?” Momo asked her while the three of you were browsing through the shops and did some window shopping before making any decisions about where to go, and Em—having no knowledge of the turmoil happening in your head at that moment—nonchalantly answered,

“Something that would give a nice message as a congratulatory and send-off gift.”

Momo stole a glance your way then before asking. “Send-off? Is it for a friend of yours?”

“Yes,” Em said, looking at the two of you with a bashful smile that told you more than any spoken word could. “He’s a really special friend of mine who is moving to the States sometime next month. He got this terrific offer that would allow him to make more music, which is basically a huge upgrade to what he’s been doing here lately,” she explained, then she turned to you with a request, “He’s also a good friend of Rome. I mean, Christian. Since they’ve been spending time together quite often lately, would it be okay if I ask you not to say anything to Ian when you see him? I don’t want to spoil the surprise too soon. We’ll be leaving for the States together once the date is set, but my friends and I are planning to have a send-off party the weekend before. I’m thinking of giving the gift to him then.”

The smile that came to your face was almost spontaneous. The relief that you felt must have been palpable, yet you couldn’t get yourself to reel it in. Though you did manage to control your composure when you promised her, “Your secret is safe with me,” while you tried to qualm the feeling of guilt for having suspected the relationship that she has with Christian.

On the phone, Christian gives you a sarcastic scoff and says, “Riiiight—”

“It’s not what you think, I promise.”

“No, I get it. Those discount sale offers can be quite intriguing,” he says, obviously having the wrong assumption about what you are truly up to. You wish you could explain, yet this is just another secret that you would have to keep from him. At least until the end of the month, when Em would finally be able to reveal her surprise gift for her special friend. “Look, just go ahead and have fun with your friend. You deserve it,” Christian adds, though his voice sounds lighter, no more of his feigned annoyance is heard. In its place, you can hear his smile, which only draws your own to appear.

“Thank you,” you say to him. “Aren’t you supposed to be busy right now?”

“Yeah, I’m in the middle of a break, but we’re getting back into it in a minute,” he says, already sounding a bit distracted just as the noises behind him start growing a bit louder. “Call me when you’re back. Maybe, you know, you can give me a little preview—”

Knowing where this is heading, you quickly cut him off before he could say the words, “Goodbye, Ian.”

He chuckles on the phone. “See you later, baby,” he says, before ending the call, all while your heart is racing so violently in your chest for the endearment that he had just given you. Immediately, your face grows hot, and your mind seems to be swirling up to the air with the joy blooming inside you.

Still feeling as if you are on cloud nine, you almost miss it when Momo turns to call you over, “I think we’ve found the perfect one. Come here and take a look at this, try to see if you like it too.”

Putting your phone away, you rush towards your best friend and your new shopping companion, Em, who appears just as giddy and excited as Momo is to show what they have found. Seeing their combined reactions, you cannot help but share the same sentiment, and it adds a bit of pep to your footsteps as you come to join them in finding the perfect gift for Em’s secret crush.

“How about this one?” Em asks you as she shows you yet another pair of bikinis that seems a bit too revealing compared to what you are used to. You make no comment about her choice of outfit as she hands the delicate pair to you, choosing to take a good look at the piece to appreciate her genuine effort in helping you to find the piece that might fit your taste more.

Ever since the three of you came into the store, both Em and Momo have been assisting you to find the perfect pair for you to buy, as they took notice of your indecisiveness right away. Everything you are seeing in the store has been lovely that it is making it impossible for you to choose, yet the two girls have only been of little help to you. Because when Em keeps choosing the most revealing and extremely daring ones she could find in the store which makes your face burn each time you try to imagine yourself wearing them, Momo has been choosing the ones with the brightest colours and flashy frills that you would never be able to wear without getting your face burning in embarrassment.

This time, however, the piece that you are holding in your hand seems to have caught your eye. It is a solid coffee-coloured triangle set with beaded strings, and a halter top that covers just a bit more skin compared to the previous ones she showed you. The piece sure looks like a major upgrade from the small black piece that she showed you earlier with the top which barely covered your boobs and the thin strip bottom, and while it looks revealing, it seems a bit more appropriate to wear at Momo’s house this weekend—where some or any of her family members might be present—compared to the other ones she has shown you so far.

“You know what? This one actually looks quite nice,” you say to her, acknowledging her taste in style and suddenly believing that you might actually look good in something that seems quite daring.

Your comment seems to please her as her face instantly brightens. And for some reason, it makes you just as happy to see her getting excited for you. This new feeling is quite—odd. Not more than an hour ago, the air of awkwardness that was present had made it hard for you to start a conversation with her without Momo’s help. You cannot deny that the underlying doubt that you felt about her relationship with Christian had made you feel inferior while being around her. Added with the way she looks and dresses and how she wears her confidence so openly, something that is quite the opposite if compared to you.

But that feeling is no longer present now when you have finally gotten to know her a bit better, and once you got to see her bubbly personality that seems to fit your and Momo’s energy perfectly.

Once that bridge has been crossed, you begin to see and understand why she is able to get along with Christian and his friend group. The more you spend time with her, the more you are able to see how kind and friendly Em really is. And that despite her pristine appearance, she could be quite—clumsy.

Much like you are.

Perhaps knowing that you aren’t completely different from one another has been the reason why you are beginning to feel comfortable hanging out with her without anyone else’s helping you.

“Great! I knew you’d like it. The set comes with a cover-up too,” she says, plucking the thin piece of coverup from the rack that appears to be a part of the set for you to try on. “Here, try them all on together and see if it’s something you’d like. Oh, and try the black one too,” she insists, quickly snatching the similar set in black before handing them to you along with the coffee one. She looks at the sets you are now holding and sighs dramatically. “I still think the previous one was hotter, though.”

“Oh, no,” you quickly say to her, shaking your head when you recall the one she mentioned. “The black one you picked for me was not a bikini top, those were nipple patches.”

Your comment makes her laugh. “Yeah, I admit, those were more daring than the rest. But I have a couple of them at home and they’re really comfortable. And I bet you’d look really good in them.”

You almost grimace as you try to picture yourself wearing those tiny things, though you hide it the best you could, knowing that Em has rocked those types of bikinis perfectly and is evidently loving them to bits. You know this because she has shown you a few photos of her wearing them from her social media, and you have to admit, she does look good wearing all the daring pieces you saw that you almost feel envious of her confidence.

Em leaves you be as you make your way to the fitting room at the back of the store, only to suddenly return before you can get there so she can slip a couple of new items into your arms to add to the pile that you are about to try on.

“Here, try on these too while you’re at it. Can’t hurt to know how they would look on you, can it?” she says, while you only roll your eyes and laugh at her.

“Fine, if it makes you happy.”

Sliding into one of the vacant booths, you finally get to take a look at what you have gotten with you so far. Aside from the two complete sets that Em got you earlier, you also find the black top which you classified as nipple patches among the pile. This one is adorned with gold chains tying the top up to hang around your neck, making it look a bit more classy compared to the ones that Em initially found when she first started helping you.

Shaking your head and chuckling at Em’s sneaky antics, you put the tiny thing away to have a look at the others. Other than a new pair that looks similar to the black and coffee sets that you liked earlier, you find another bikini set which Em managed to slip in. This one looks just as revealing as the other ones, if not just a bit more, with a brighter colour that makes them pop in your eyes. You hold up the red halter bikini top which comes together with a thong-like bottom that leaves almost nothing to the imagination. Although, there is a sheer long skirt that comes with the pair, what seems to be a coverup that looks to be sufficient enough to cover the bottom half if you need it.

Surprisingly, you find yourself liking this piece as well. Just when you are pressing the pieces against your body just to imagine how it would look on you, you hear a knock at the door before Momo speaks to you from the other side.

“Em told me that you’re in here. So, have you finally found something you like?” she teases, while you can only shake your head and laugh.

You look down at your stash with a sigh. “Will you be patient? Perfection takes time.”

A scoff is heard from your best friend, and you can almost imagine her rolling her eyes at you. “Or you’re just being too picky. Hurry up and try them on, then come out here so we can see it. Em already approved the ones I picked.”

You smile at your reflection in the mirror when you recall Momo slipping into a fitting booth with an arm full of bright-coloured bikini sets. “Why should I show you mine if I didn’t get to see what you’re buying?”

“You’ll get to see them later when we’re paying for them. I only want to see yours to make sure you’ll look hot in my jacuzzi,” she says, making you laugh.

“Okay, let me try these on. Now leave me alone.”

You hear nothing from Momo other than a simple, “Okay,” and you start choosing the ones you want to see yourself in. Surprisingly drawn towards the red bikini set, you immediately pick that one to try first. While you can never possibly imagine yourself wearing it this weekend, you want to see if it would be something that you could wear sometime in the future.

The thin fabric feels like silk on your skin, but they are surprisingly comfortable. You are originally not one to wear something this revealing, always have been choosing the modest ones whenever you could, yet you can definitely see yourself in this set even if it may not happen for a while.

“Which one are you trying on now?” you hear Momo asking, and you absentmindedly answer her while admiring your own reflection, turning left and right to see yourself from every angle, making sure that the piece actually works for you before you can buy it.

“It’s the red one that Em found for me.”

“Really?” you can hear Em squealing from outside, excited to hear that you are trying out the piece that she seems to like. It makes you stop to hear her voice, realising that she is also out there, crowding the front of your booth with Momo.

“Seriously? Are you guys actually standing out there together waiting for me to show these?”

“We just want to see them,” Momo whines, while Em chimes in curiously,

“So? How do they look? Do you like them? Don’t they look gorgeous?”

They actually do look gorgeous, and it makes you look more appealing while wearing them. You feel the sudden urge and excitement to show them, especially Em, just to make her happy to see you trying this on. Yet, thinking about stepping out of the booth right this minute makes you feel a bit insecure.

“Um—do I have to step out and show you guys? They’re really—well, I feel exposed,” you hesitantly admit, feeling every bit self-conscious about stepping out of this booth.

It is one thing to wear this on a beach or while you are lounging in a fancy jacuzzi. It is another thing to be flaunting it around while being in the middle of a mall. With strangers around you to see. Momo seems to get this when you hear her snickering from the other side of the door.

“Then take pictures of them and send them to me so we can have a look.”

“Ooh, good idea!” Taking out your phone, you start taking pictures of yourself. Posing right in front of the mirror, you find the best angles that would be able to show the set that you are wearing, before covering your bottom half with the sheer skirt and taking photos of yourself wearing the complete set as well. “Hang on, let me try out the others before sending them to you.”

You barely hear Momo’s response as you quickly change out of the first bikini set, then repeat everything again as you try out the other two which you liked earlier—the coffee and black ones that you would feel more confident to wear. Feeling cold, you rush to quickly send all the pictures, adding a short comment for the coffee-coloured one in the message, ‘I’m getting this one for the weekend.’

Once you are done, you place your phone aside and change back into your clothes as you wait for Momo’s reaction to the pictures you sent. When you hear nothing from them, you simply figure that they might be still looking through the photos and think nothing of it and focus on sorting out the pieces you tried on before taking them with you.

But then Momo calls out to you from outside, getting you confused when she asks, “What’s taking you so long? Did you take the pictures yet?”

You stop in the middle of tidying yourself up. “What do you mean? I sent them all to you already.”

“Really? I’m getting nothing on my phone though.”

Wondering what the hell went wrong, you pick up the phone to see what happened with the messages you sent her. Only to have your stomach dropping once you open your message app, finally realising what you have done. Because you already did send out the messages and the pictures, except that you had not been messaging Momo the entire time.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck—” you curse at yourself when you see Christian’s name and his profile picture on top of the message thread. Panicking, you quickly begin deleting all the photos, even though deep down, you know that it would be no use. Minutes have gone by since they were sent out, and while Christian would often take a while to check on his phone whenever he is busy, you can already see that he had seen the pictures already, even if it had only been mere seconds before you started deleting them.

A sharp gasp and a desperate cry leave your lips as you drop down to the floor, feeling like your legs are giving up on you, drawing Momo’s concern when she can hear everything from outside.

“What’s wrong? What happened?”

Covering your face with your palms, you groan defeatedly before answering, “Nothing’s wrong. Just give me a minute.”

With a deep breath, you pick up your cell phone again to call Christian, who answers the call within the first ring, confirming your suspicions that he has been holding his phone the entire time to witness your shenanigans. The photos showing off the outfits you were trying on wouldn’t be such a big deal if you hadn’t been showing that much skin, or the funny and sultry poses you did to show off the sets which were originally meant for your best friend, or the fact that you have not even been dating this man for more than a day for you to be showing him—all of these things together.

“Did you open the text message? Please tell me you didn’t get it,” you immediately question him even before he could finish saying hello.

“Mhhmm—” is the only response he is giving you.

“That wasn’t supposed to be for you,” you continue blabbering, hoping for any slight chance that he might have not seen them and you had been quick enough to delete them before he could. “I’m so sorry. I was too shy to come out and show them to Momo when she asked to take a look so I took the photos for her instead.”

“Mhhmm—”

“What does that mean? Oh my God, you’ve seen them,” you worriedly question his lack of response and groan deeply when you realise what had happened. Though knowing that he had no doubt seen the photos only makes you grow more concerned about other things. “Oh no, you’re still working, aren’t you? Did anyone else see it? Is someone there with you?”

Christian chuckles softly on the phone. “Yes, I’m still at work. Don’t worry, Dabin had just stepped out of the room when I opened your text.”

“Okay—” you softly answer, though your voice fades to a muffled groan as you sit back against the booth and hug your folded legs as if it can help you hide from the world, which is clearly not missed by Christian.

“What’s wrong? You sound funny.”

Sighing, you refuse to raise your head as you answer, “Nothing. Just trying to figure out how to bury myself so I would stop feeling embarrassed.”

While you are busy covering your burning face, you can almost hear the smile on his face when Christian speaks again, “I guess I have to get used to this, huh?”

“To what? What do you mean?”

Chuckling softly, he answers you with a teasing voice, “Getting stray messages coming in when least expected. I don’t mind it, though.”

Burying your face deeper into your folded knees, you let out another groan. “Please stop. God, I wish I was at least drunk.” Thinking of how often this has happened between the two of you, you can only sigh to yourself. How could you have forgotten that you have been messaging constantly with Christian while you were out the whole day? “Fucking stupid. I should’ve paid more attention.”

Your comment makes him laugh, though he quickly tries to console you by saying, “Hey, it’s fine. The messages are gone on my part too. I was just about to ask you about them when you finally noticed and they started disappearing.”

“Thank God I was quick enough, though,” you say with a sigh. “I’m sorry again. Please forget that this happened.”

You hear him chuckling softly on the phone. “Forget? Hah—Now, that would be a bit hard to do,” he teases, making you smile. It is quite funny how easily he makes you feel calmer, when you were so close to crying over your own stupidity merely moments ago.

“Ian, please.”

“I’m just teasing you, baby. Don’t worry about it, okay? Besides, no one else had seen them and they’re no longer on my phone. Although, I wish I had saved them—”

Your cheeks have been growing warm with how gentle he is when speaking to you and calling you with this new endearment that he has chosen for you, but that quickly changes with his teasing that you roll your eyes. “Really?”

He laughs. “I’m joking, baby. I wouldn’t do that to you. Besides, I can always keep them in my memory—” he says, while humming softly as if he is closing his eyes to recall the photos again, “—or wait for a chance to have you showing them yourself for a private preview.”

“Hah, we’ll see about that, Mister,” you scoff at him, making him laugh. But as you find yourself feeling better and feeling less like an utter idiot, you cannot help but whisper to him, “Thank you, Ian.”

“Anytime. Now go on and continue shopping with your friend. Don’t mind me while I’m here trying to work and not think about those photos. I’m going to be dealing with a ton of stuff here anyway, so I probably won’t remember any of them by the end of the day,” he says, drawing a smile to your face. You feel grateful for the way he is able to help you qualm your trepidation and dread simply with his gentle voice and comforting words.

Yet, in a typical fashion of his, Christian reminds you of his mischievous ways as he teases you for the last time before ending the call, “Hey, babe? I think I liked the red one the best on you.”

Past the entire shenanigans happening during your shopping spree, followed by the busy week where you had to go through classes and assignments while Christian was keeping up with work, the weekend finally comes.

There was nobody home when you arrived at Momo’s house in the morning, as her family members were mostly out for the weekend, so you and Momo got to enjoy the entire house to yourselves and hang out in the new jacuzzi for as long as you like. While lounging in the hot water during the afternoon, the two of you talk about the day you spent at the mall. You share with her your apprehensions about Em and how your feelings changed after spending time with her and getting to see what kind of person Em truly was. Then Momo shares her curiosity about the secret crush that Em harbours and who it might have been directed to.

“Could it be Dabin?” she curiously asks you after chugging down her cold beer, while you shake your head.

“Not sure. She only said that it was one of Ian’s music producer friends, and Dabin has a lot of projects coming up with Ian so I don’t think it would make sense for him to leave,” you tell her, to which Momo groans softly.

“Yeah, that would be hard to figure out then cause we know Christian has a ton of friends, and I doubt you’ve met every single one of them already.”

Hearing this makes you smile. “You’re right, he does have a lot of friends and connections.”

“Speaking of Ian,” she suddenly says, turning to you with a sly grin on her face. “Are you excited about tonight?”

Your eyes grow wide, and you immediately feel your nerves spiking when you are reminded about what is happening tonight. After having only met Christian in person twice the entire week and only during classes, with both of you being so busy with your daily schedules, he finally called to propose taking you out on a date once he is done with his project this week. Once you found out that Momo has another plan tonight after hanging out with you, both you and Christian agreed to set the date for tonight, once he is done with the day and after Momo drops you back at your place when she leaves at sunset.

“I’m more nervous than excited, to be honest,” you admit to her, while Momo waves her hand at you.

“It’s fine. Everything’s going to be just fine,” she says, consoling you in her own way. “You’ve gone out with him before, so it’s going to be nothing different than those times, right?”

You ponder about it for a moment, and it only makes you frown just to think about seeing him tonight.

Because, no, absolutely not. It wouldn’t be anything like the times you shared with him previously.

Because this time, it would be a date. A real date. Not just a simple meet-up at the coffee place like the times you had to meet him after class to discuss about the class assignments, or when you came with him to the work party, or the night you joined him and his friends for drinks. This is different. It would be just the two of you—no friends, no assignments, no other people around that he has to meet up with as he is handling his business. It would be just you and Christian doing whatever it is that he has planned for you.

“I don’t think there’s anything for you to worry about, though. The guy likes you, and you like him too. I’m sure things will be great. Just like how it’s always been. Both of you are similar in a way, so I’m sure he’ll make it comfortable for you instead of making things awkward for a first date.”

You rest your back against the side of the jacuzzi, with the hot water bubbling against your sides, massaging your toned muscles and rubbing away the tension you have in your body. You relish the pleasure you are getting while taking in what Momo is saying. She wasn’t completely wrong. Things with Christian have been flowing so easily. You have always been so comfortable when you are near him, while he seems to have always been able to sense your mood, always keeping up with your pace instead of going about things in a more rushed and lavish way.

Perhaps the only thing that makes you worried is the fact that things have also been proceeding the way you had never once thought they would. How everything that is happening now feels like a dream, and there is a deep fear haunting you that once you are with him, once everything between the two of you changes to a new direction, you would be forced to wake up and face reality, to see that nothing is as beautiful as what your mind keeps telling you to see.

Just like what happened back then with—

Shaking away your worries, you tell yourself that things are different now. Things have to be different. Because you have no idea how you would be able to deal with it if things turn the other way around once again.

“You know what? Maybe you’re right. I’m worrying too much,” you finally say to Momo, making her smile with relief, not realising that you have also been consoling yourself by saying this.

“Good. That’s the spirit. Just enjoy everything and have fun with him. I’ll help you get ready if you want to and we’ll make sure you’ll be knocking him off of his feet once he sees you tonight.”

Closing your eyes, you try to relax and give in to the comforting warmth around you, trying not to overthink and let your agitation takes over when you are supposed to be having a good time. Both now, as you are lounging in this fancy jacuzzi without having to spend a single penny, and later, when you are about to see the man who has always managed to cause your heartbeat to race wildly in your chest.

You remain in the hot tub only for a while later, stepping out just as both of you start feeling more relaxed and you are ready to continue the lazy afternoon pampering each other and relaxing on her cozy pool-house. It isn’t until sunset when you are finally ready to leave, with Momo dropping you off before she heads out to where she needs to be.

“Remember—” she says, once you stepped out of her car, “Don’t be so nervous and relax, enjoy your night with him. You won’t be able to have a good time if you’re worrying too much.”

“I know. Thanks, babe,” you answer her gratefully, somehow finding yourself believing in your own words this time.

“Anytime,” she says, before quickly adding, “Oh, and wear something sexy!”

“Goodbye, Momo,” is all you say to her as you shut the car door close, and you soon watch her car rolling out of the parking lot, leaving you all on your own to get ready for your first night out with your new boyfriend.

[06.58 PM] From Christian: I’ll pick you up around eight. Will that be okay?

[07.03 PM] To Christian: I’ll be waiting ;)

[07.04 PM] From Christian: I can’t wait to see you :)

Just when you had thought you were ready for your fateful first date, the text that Christian sent you only makes you feel on the edge. Once again, you feel tense. The tension that you feel as you are reading his texts may not be as daunting as it was before, when your imagination kept running wild and your insecurities kept taking over with still many hours left before the date happens, yet it doesn’t mean that you are not nervous enough about tonight.

The thought of meeting up and being alone with him tonight seems nerve-racking. But just like how you managed to get over your worries earlier, you keep repeating the same comforting words in your head like a spell as you continue getting yourself ready to see him.

Everything is going to be okay.

You continue reminding yourself of this as time continues to pass. The clock is ticking, your heartbeat keeps racing, and your feet would not stop pacing each time you try to relax. You can barely able to get yourself together with nothing distracting your running thoughts, but by the time eight o’clock rolls around, you have gathered up enough composure to stop pacing around your living room and pulling at your dress as you wait for him to arrive. The long trails of discarded clothes that you left behind in your bedroom when you couldn’t decide what to wear would have to wait until you return home. Right now, all you can think of is how you are going to keep it together once he is here.

A knock comes at the door, and it makes your heart do funny things even before you get to see him in person. After giving yourself a brief pep talk while shaking your trembling hands to make them calm, you finally open the door. Your heart begins doing that funny thing again, skipping a beat and rushing at the sight of Christian standing right in front of the door, waiting for you, wearing his dashing smile on his face while being surrounded by an air of confidence that makes you look at him in awe.

Stunned speechless, you say nothing to him, giving him a chance to take the sight of you in. His eyes trail down on you with an appreciative look. Going from your face to your dress, and it makes your skin grow warm under his perusing gaze. Seeing that you are still unable to speak, a smile expands so subtly on his face as he greets you first, “Hey.”

“H-hey,” you stammer in response, which only makes his smile grow wider.

“You look great,” he says, making your cheeks burn even hotter.

“Thanks,” you chuckle softly. “You too.”

Christian laughs softly at this. “Are you ready? I have an Uber ride waiting for us downstairs. I hope you don’t mind. I figured if we were both going to have drinks afterwards—”

You look up to him as he speaks and feel an instant sense of relief. Because it suddenly becomes quite obvious to you that he might be just as nervous as you currently are when you notice him rushing as he speaks, and he doesn’t seem to know what to do with his hands when he keeps slipping them in and out of his pockets or running them through his immaculate hair.

“I’m set to go. Thanks for thinking ahead,” you quickly reassure him before he could continue with his rambling, and a visible look of relief appears on his face.

“After you,” he says as he steps aside to let you join him once you have your jacket and purse with you, locking the door behind you as you leave for the night.

It is a warm night, so the two of you decide to have the ride drop you off a block away from your destination so you can enjoy the short walk there, with the sight of the city’s main river accompanying your walk. As you walk side by side with him, his hand entwined gently with yours to keep you by his side and the conversation flowing slowly as you talk about your day, you find yourself steadily getting more and more comfortable. The tension that has been following you the whole day soon fades, while the familiar ease that you have often felt when you are with him starts coming back to you.

It doesn’t take long before you finally reach the restaurant that he had chosen for tonight’s date. Situated right at the end of the boardwalk that you have been walking on and not too far from the clear river is a quaint pizza place, partly hidden from the main road but still open to the view around the neighbourhood to allow you to enjoy the comfortable atmosphere around you. He finds a table for two outside, quite a distance away from the sidewalk that you can have your own space without having to worry about the passing crowd. A soft tune of music is playing from the restaurant, giving you a pleasant welcome as you both begin perusing the menu.

He makes a suggestion to order their signature dish, the cheese pizza, which you are completely fine with, while you choose the appetiser and one of their pasta plates to share between you two. As he hasn’t been drinking alcohol as often lately, Christian chooses a glass of their special draft beer to taste and a bottle of soda to go with his dinner, while you order a glass of cheap wine that costs nearly the same as his orders.

This is all happening so fluidly—how you talk about the menu without worry and choosing what the two of you would like to have and share—that it feels almost natural to do something like this. There is no hint of awkwardness existing between you, helping you to forget that you are on an actual date instead of casually hanging out with him, even if the feeling lasts just for a brief moment.

Your stomach has been in knots since you left home with him. While the short walk here and the conversation that was shared from then until this moment have helped a little to put you at ease, he would constantly bring back the tension either with his gestures or by being particularly flirty. Each time his fingers come brushing gently against your hand, sparks instantly start flying in the air around you. Your skin would tingle when you are talking to him and he leans closer to listen with rapt attention, and your chest would feel tight when his eyes are looking deeply into yours.

And then he reminds you the reason why you have always been so captivated with him and how you began to harbour a deep crush on him, as he shares with you about everything that he has been up to lately—of the long hours he spent filming with his crew and the long nights he spent working on post-production, and also about how he is slowly diving back into making his music again. It is the moment you look into his eyes when the flutter in your chest returns, when you get to see the clear sight of his love and passion for what he does, the look that is so captivating to see that you are once again lost for words.

The waiter returns to your table just then, setting down the drinks that Christian ordered before pouring the red wine into your glass. Once he is done, Christian leans forward to get closer.

“So—how about you? You said this week has been busy for you,” he inquires so suddenly, sounding genuinely curious to know what you have been up to this week while he has been busy with his own thing and you haven’t seen each other after attending his last class.

“Oh, just the usual,” you answer with a shrug. You tell him everything about the classes you went to this week and all the mundane things you would usually do during the day. But then as you begin sharing with him about your assignments, and the exciting things you do during your part-time job in the night, your excitement grows. He should be able to notice it from the tone of your voice, or the way you keep twirling the wine glass in your hand as you speak. Either way, there seems to be no way Christian would miss the way you are enjoying these things, as he keeps his eyes on you the entire time, looking deeply at you as he listens, taking in everything you are sharing with him.

“Speaking of your work—” you hum, suddenly recalling the day you joined him during filming. “I kind of missed being in that environment, to be able to see you work and see how you handle things in the set. Your crew seems so fun to work with too.”

Hearing this makes him smile. “You’re right. I’m lucky to be working with a group of talented people. Working with them has been fun,” he says, before he suddenly tilts his head and you see him getting curious about something.

“You know, I’ve been wondering—” he starts as he leans closer over the table to gently ask you, “How did you get here?”

You raise your eyebrows. “You…picked me up. At home,” you answer him, feigning innocence, even if you have quite an inkling of what he is trying to ask.

“I’m not talking about being here,” he chuckles softly. “How did you end up studying film production? Have you always been so interested in making videos and movies?”

You bite your lips. Not feeling sure how to answer him at first. “It’s quite a long story,” you finally tell him. “And a part of it might be a bit embarrassing to share.”

Christian gives you a reassuring smile. “I got time. And I won’t laugh, I promise.”

Sipping your wine slowly, you try to decide where to begin. Once you gather enough courage, you finally admit to him softly, “Actually, I could probably say that I got interested to dive deeper into this because of you.”

Christian’s eyes grow wide in shock, obviously not prepared enough to hear this. “What—?”

Chuckling softly, you begin to tell him everything. “When I started college, I knew I was either going to study art or film, but I have to admit that I had no direction to know where to go. I’ve always loved movies and old films, and I loved the artistry behind creating music videos. I’ve also been drawn to documentary videos for a long time, but I never knew if I would be able to take up the challenge to dive into that world. And then I remember stumbling upon your videos during that time—” you stop briefly as you recall finding his raw videos before his crew grew into what is known today, but it was seeing him sharing those raw videos and making the process behind them seem like such a fun thing to do that got you so drawn into the entire process and finally getting to love it as well.

“I tried to see if I would like it, so I started by learning and doing photography while saving up to buy my own camera set. Then you started sharing your travel videos and your post-production process online, and it got me interested in learning more about photography and film. And I was right about it being so much fun. I found the kind of challenge I was looking for in film major.” You stop for a brief moment and cannot help but smile as you recall those days when you finally had your mind set on it. “Let me just say that switching from art major to film production was the best decision I’ve ever made in life.”

You turn to smile at him just then, realising that you finally get the chance to do the one thing that you have always wanted to do. That you finally get to do what you had always imagined you would be once you meet him in person. “Thank you for inspiring me, by the way,” you say to him with a grateful smile, before adding playfully, “And if it wasn’t for you, I probably wouldn’t end up taking the post-production course to finally meet you in person.”

Christian has been in such awe as he listens to your story that he seems to be lost for words. You feel worried that you might have been oversharing with him and that you are making him uncomfortable with your confession. A part of you is relieved that you get to say all of this instead of keeping them to yourself, but another part of you is afraid that he might feel burdened by the admiration you have for him, and you are worried that it might only push him away.

But seeing him getting flustered makes you feel intrigued, curious to know how he feels about what you had just said to him. Clearing his throat, he rubs a palm over his lips to cover his bashful smile, though you can still see the crimson shade materialising on his skin.

“You’re flattering me too much that I have no idea what to say,” he says with a nervous chuckle. Noticing your silence as you are waiting for his response, and perhaps noticing how shy and tense you seem to be feeling, Christian scoots his chair closer until he is within inches of you and reaches for your hand, once again igniting the sparks between you as he takes your smaller hands between his larger ones.

“But I’m glad that finding my videos was what led you to me,” he gently says as he rubs his fingers against yours. “Or else, we probably wouldn’t be sitting together like this tonight, and I wouldn’t get to know your amazing personality and talent.”

This time, you are the one who is flustering in the middle of what was supposed to be an innocent conversation. With his hand on yours, his deep eyes looking intently into yours, and his presence being so close, you are not only feeling sparks rising between you, but also heat simmering in the air that you start feeling a different kind of tension. The kind that gets your chest filled with delicate flutters and your body growing warm.

The food arrives, granting a short moment of reprieve from the rolling tension as he finally leans away and the two of you soon dive into the beautiful meal while the conversation between you lightens.

“So,” he says while eyeing you expectantly as he slowly devours his food. “Tell me more about your, um—little adventure at the mall.”

You immediately laugh at this. “There is nothing more to share. If any, I think I may have already overshared with you by accidentally sending you those photos.”

Christian softly chuckles, and he glances at you with a sly look dancing in his gaze. “I have no regrets of it happening,” he says, while you can only shake your head.

“I’m sure you don’t,” you taunt him in return.

Despite playing along, he probably suspects that you are still feeling uncomfortable about the mishap that happened that day. He reaches across the table to once again cover your hands with his. “Don’t worry, nobody else saw those photos, I promise. And you deleted them from both devices already so you won’t be able to find those photos anywhere on my phone, I’m sure,” he says, reassuring you. Though it is hard to feel immediately relieved when you see the playful grin growing on his face soon after. “Lucky for me, I have quite a good memory, so I won’t have to look for them again to remember everything. Like the coffee-coloured one that you said you were buy—ow! I’m kidding!”

Rubbing his upper arm which had just become the victim of your reflexed slapping, Christian laughs, pleased to see your reaction. You tease each other a while longer while you continue enjoying your meal, with his hand occasionally reaching out to you at every chance he gets, from brushing against yours to entwining his fingers between yours whenever he likes it.

When casting your gaze down on your joined hands, your heartbeat would start racing rapidly. Everything still feels like a dream that you want to pinch your skin so badly to see if you would wake up from this, yet you can still feel his warmth through your entwined fingers, letting you know that this moment is real.

Then you would look up to see his face, to see his smile from up close and listen to his voice as he chats with you, and you realise that he is real.

Instead of allowing your nerves to take over and have yourself be intimidated by his presence, you choose to savour this moment. Because the more you open yourself to him, and the longer you are together with this man, you finally realise that the infatuation that you feel growing between you isn’t simply a figment of your imagination. That it is truly there, and it is just as real as the two of you, present and blooming steadily even without any of you realising it.

Once dinner is done, Christian takes you to another walk just to have more time with you. This time, he chooses to make a stop at the small dessert spot not too far from your place and start from there.

You can feel his eyes on you while you are slowly licking at your ice cream, savouring the taste and this serene moment you have together as you walk on the side of the street, with nobody paying attention to any of you.

“Have you been enjoying the night so far?” Christian suddenly asks you once you arrive at your place and he is now walking you to your door.

“Do you hear me complaining?” you question him, drawing a smile to his face. “I had fun. I think it was the most fun I’ve had in a while, to be honest.”

Chuckling softly, Christian nods his head. “Same with me. I always love being with you,” he admits slowly. “You always make me feel—” he sighs, as if having trouble finding the right words to say. “Comfortable with myself, if I have to describe it with words, and that’s not even half of it.”

Soon enough, you are standing right in front of your door, with your hands entwined and he is not showing any sign of letting you go. Deep down, you also feel like you are not ready to part ways with him. Your chest feels heavy as you are not ready for the night to end this soon.

So you turn to him, smiling as you nervously ask him, “Do you want to come in?”

His smile grows, and there is something showing in his gaze that looks quite unfamiliar to you when he says, “I would love to.”

He follows you as you walk into your warm home, still with your hands interlaced with one another. The moment the door is closed right behind him, Christian reaches out to you and pulls you to him, before he finally does the one thing he seems to have wanted to do all night long, as he soon leans down, capturing your lips in his to a deep, long kiss that takes your breath away.

And the heat that has been simmering between you the entire night erupts into flame.

#kvanity #christian yu scenarios #christian yu x reader #christian yu fanfic #christian yu fluff #christian yu smut #dpr ian x reader #dpr ian scenario #yu barom x reader #yu barom scenarios #khh scenarios #khh fanfic #khh smut #dpr ian #christian yu

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punkeccentricenigma · 7 months

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headcanons with the rise boys and a reader who is in med school! Graduated high school early and is training to be a doctor! Romantic or platonic, your pick

Rise!Boys with Reader who is in Med School

Relationship status: platonic

Reader prounouns: They/Them

TW: Mention of slicing the frog, Some grammatical errors because english is not my first language.

Author's note: Just so you know, I am not familiar with medicine at the college level, only what I had in high school biology, so I tried to write these headcanons as neutrally as possible. And all in all, even if I learn anything now, it is only in the field of physiotherapy because my friend is going to such studies this year, so sorry if it's not what you wanted, but still, enjoy!

Leonardo

◇I won't lie, I'm sure this guy admires you.

◇Not everyone gets a chance to get into such a school!

◇But knowing his personality, he'll probably tease you a lot, calling you a 'nerd.'

◇It usually doesn't cross the line, BUT if Leonardo goes too far with his teasing, especially when you're tired after classes, you often threaten to perform a dissection on him like a frog.

◇And when he arrogantly waved it off at first, you and Donnie pulled a prank on him with that theme.

◇Everything was recorded as he lay pinned to the table, and you stood over him with a scalpel.

◇Leo thinks you're very diligent, hardworking, and disciplined, which also means mentally exhausted.

◇Such a school demands a lot, so expect that during study sessions in your cozy home, that idiotic turtle will come and drag you to the hidden city to relax.

◇I'm sure he'll try to make you laugh often using elaborate medical jokes he found on the internet.

◇Sometimes he also feels a bit jealous. He has some basic knowledge when he has to patch himself or his brothers up, but deep down, he would also like to go to such a medical school to enhance his skills. But you see the whole situation.

◇But don't worry! In your free time, you'll give him a bit of education with the knowledge you've acquired so far.

◇Even if he tries to hide it, he's a bit overwhelmed by the vast amount of knowledge and skills you possess.

◇But despite that, he's proud of you for taking on the challenge and fulfilling your dreams! Or at least you're on the right path to doing so.

Raphael

◇The proudest big bro! You got into that school?? Amazing!

◇Your number one supporter!

◇Raphael truly appreciates your intelligence, hard work, and determination. He never imagined himself getting into a medical school, not only because of the whole situation but also because his knowledge absolutely doesn't go in the same direction as yours. But that his friend managed it? Nice!

◇He admires your selfless need to help other people. He's keeping his green fingers crossed for you to achieve that dream medical title!

◇I'm sure he suggested some ‘experiments’ on himself for you to practice a topic from lectures. In the end, you hit him on the head for such an absurd idea. You didn't intend to do that! That's Donatello's role! Besides, mixed human DNA with turtle DNA would probably mess with your mind more than help.

◇Although their biology sometimes interested you.

◇When he notices you're tired and stressed from all the medical material, he'll gladly take you to their living room, and under a warm blanket, you'll have a Lou Jitsu movie marathon (where you'll eventually fall asleep, lmao) or play a bandana takeover with his brothers, all tricks allowed for your amusement!

◇Hey, don't complain about his support. Many times, you've helped him when he was stressed about being the leader before Leo or after the Kraang invasion. That's all he can do!

◇Sometimes he was confused and a bit unhappy when you started explaining various medical terms or tools to him. Raph is simple; give him a lighter version of all that.

◇Sometimes he wasn't happy that you declined meetings because of studying or lectures. Hey! He also needs attention sometimes D:

Donatello

◇Donnie is really proud of you, even if he doesn't express it in words every day.

◇But as a reward for your hard work, he'll fine-tune the devices you use for practice or build something helpful.

◇He appreciates your genuine interest in understanding difficult concepts and your ability for critical thinking. You don't even know how much he needed someone like you in his life, looking at his family.

◇Despite your enthusiasm and intelligence, he thinks you might overly stress about grades and perfectionism, which in the long run can lead to stress and burnout. So, he often forces you to take a break in his lab, sipping mint-flavored coffee.

◇It's also his small revenge for taking him away from his work on new inventions when he hasn't slept for two days in a row, lmao.

◇But if it's not spending time with him, the guy will go through all your material at the moment to make cheat sheets with the most important information.

◇You pose an intellectual challenge for him and keep him on his toes, but he always enjoys discussing and exploring different perspectives on a topic with you, even though he leans more towards technological knowledge than biological.

◇However, despite his intelligence, Donnie in those moments can be a bit 'know-it-all' and doesn't always consider the opinions or feelings of other people, or even the actual facts.

Michelangelo

◇You won't convince me he wouldn't be initially confused; I mean, he's the least interested in medical topics.

◇But as soon as you start explaining, he'll immediately admit that he's impressed and that he's really proud of you!

◇He'll always mention how much he appreciates your determination to achieve your dreams!

◇Personally, I have a headcanon that Mikey wants to become one of the most recognizable artists, so he roughly knows how frustrating it is when something doesn't work out.

◇In a way, I think Mikey sees you as his role model, so feel proud to be compared to Lou Jitsu :D

◇Mikey sometimes worries a lot about your mental health after lectures. So, expect many long conversations about self-care.

◇Being the youngest of the brothers, he got a lot of attention, so he'll often be jealous of how much time you spend at school and with human friends rather than with him. He knows it's immature behavior, but he can't help it!

#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #rise donnie x reader #rise mikey x reader #rise raph x reader #rise leo x reader #rottmnt x y/n #teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt x you #rottmnt x reader #Med school #headcanons

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mirroredmemoriez · 2 months

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Lynnmanda And Dedication

Back with opinions and thoughts nobody asked for! Today's topic is well, what the title says? Please be nice, I'm feeling extra silly today and I think a screw has become loose and is rattling with my singular braincell.

Basically, I probably won't be able to explain this well without showing what has prompted me to randomly make this post? Excuse the utter brain mess and nonsensical shit and uh... Try and pick up the themes I'm trying to lay down instead! (And thank you to @arythias for listening to my utter madness)

I see Amanda as needing meaning or a purpose, something or someone to dedicate herself to and just like when it comes to her love- I think it's hard for her to define clearly and almost gets mixed up because the boundaries are so unclear. Dedication to John came before her love for him in my eyes, it's what made some of it in. He gave her purpose and a cause, a reason to live and in some sense a want to as well... Even if that came into question a lot. Their relationship thrived and suffered because of the pedestal she put him on and honestly I could sit here all day and go over the relationship between these two. So anyway! With Lynn, I see it as love before dedication and the way that makes things different compared to the reliance Amanda had on John. Lynn doesn't push Amanda to follow her and would likely even tell Amanda to find her own way when it comes to what she practices and follows, such as maybe religion. This freedom makes Lynn as my associate said, more of a ''lighthouse'' for Amanda. The reliance is there for her to be a safety net, but there is more confidence and space for Amanda to make her own decisions, for trial and error. A choice for once and the independence she had forfeited in her other relationships emerging again. She isn't chained to Lynn and they both know it. This is not an issue for either. If Amanda was tied to John, then with Lynn she is merely holding her- How tight is up to her. BUT LOL THOSE ARE JUST SOME SILLY HAHAHAHTHOUGHTSIVENOTSLEPTIN HOURS NOR HAVE I ATE BUT TOXIC YURI IS ALWAYS ON THE MIND LESSSS GOOOOOOO -MAL OUT

#amanda young #lynn denlon #lynnmanda #shotgunshipping #john kramer #jigsaw #saw #saw 3 #saw iii #saw headcanons #saw movies #saw franchise #sawposting

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ikarisenpai · 6 months

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Title: I've Always Loved you Pairing: Park Jimin x f!reader Word Count: 3k+ Genre: Fluff, Holiday au Summary: You haven't seen Park Jimin in over three years and now your walking into his house to celebrate the spooky season of Halloween. Your feelings mixed as you try to avoid him, but find out he's everywhere. Will you admit your feelings or leave with rejection, find out in this Halloween special! Warning: drinking, kissing, making out, thoughts of feelings on someone else, heartbreak, I never know how to label these things...

Notes: Hello everyone! I hope you all had a very spooky Halloween and that you all stayed safe! I know I ended up staying home cause it started snowing, but with the season of Halloween I decided to write this little drabble and hope you enjoy it! Notes 2: Anyway, this is my first time writing something for BTS so sorry if the guys sound a bit out of character... I was trying something new so feed back is always welcome! Anyway, enjoy the rest of Halloween if your in the states, if not Happy November first! Byeee!!!

“What do you mean ‘you're not going’? You said you would go with me and you promised you would be there.” Your best friend Kaitlyn said as you and her were heading to Jimin’s house for a halloween party.

“I’m. Not. Going. How confusing is that?” you replied as you were laying in bed scrolling through your socials. You hadn’t seen Jimin in what felt like years, and going to this Halloween party meant bumping into him since the party was at his house.

“It's not, but you promised, so you're going. Now get dressed, or I’ll pick out the costume you're wearing, and you know which one I’d put you in.” Kaitlyn said as you gave her a look.

“I am not wearing that costume, and you know my reasoning. Why are you being such a bitch today?”

Kaitlyn shrugged, “Don’t go back on your promises and I won't be a bitch, simple as that.” She said with a huge grin on her face. You groaned knowing that this party could last all night, but being around the others did bring a slight smile to your face. You had gotten close to Hoseok and Seokjin that maybe going to the party wasn’t such a bad idea. You just had to avoid Jimin. How hard could that be?

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☽◯☾ ⋆⁺₊⋆

“I already hate it here.” You said as you looked at your friend and then at the large house in front of you. The yard and house was packed to the brim. People littered the front yard like Jimin was throwing a yard sale or something and the music that was coming from the front door seemed loud and annoying. Why in sam’s hell did you agree to come to this thing?

Kaitlyn chuckled, "Come on, let's go get a couple of drinks and we can go find Hoseok or someone. You know a ‘familiar face’ so we don’t feel so weirded out. I know I don’t like big crowds, but it was the only party that was happening tonight and we all know that Jimin can throw parties that are out of this world. We’ll have fun. Just relax okay?” Kaitlyn said as the two of you slowly made your way up to the door. You decided to dress up as Diane from The Seven Deadly Sins. Thighs out, boots up to your knee, and a similar hammer attached to your back just in case you needed to beat someone’s ass if they got too touchy. Your friend, Kaitlyn, decided to dress up as Noelle from Black Clover. She said she didn’t want to show too much skin, but if she got drunk enough you knew that she would be naked in a heartbeat. Your eyes rolling in your head as when you entered the house, it was decked out in halloween theme decorations. Fog machines, spider webs, skulls, bats, and pumpkins littering the shelves and tables that you honestly thought the house looked nice. It just made you upset because it was all at Jimin’s house and you didn’t want to be here because you hadn’t seen him in what felt like years.

“You made it! I’m surprised you got her to come!” Hoseok said as he came up to you and gave you and Kaitlyn a hug.

“Took a lot to get her here, but she’s here and she’s not going anywhere since we took my car instead of hers.” Kaitlyn said as you huffed but hugged Hoseok back as you were happy to see him.

“Well, come in! Lets go get you ladies something to drink! I saw Jimin spike the punch with vodka but if you have something else you want to drink, you should have brought it yourself.” Hoseok laughed as you couldn’t move to the kitchen fast enough. You swore you could hear Jimin talking to someone nearby and your heart was racing.

“Y/N! You’re here! OMG! I’m so happy you're here!” Taehyung smiled as you could tell he had already started drinking.

“Hey, V, how are you doing?” You asked as the four of you made your way to the punch bowl and started pouring drinks. You didn’t really want to drink, but Kaitlyn said it would help you relax more so bottoms up and pray you’ll have a good night.

“I’m doing wonderful! Have you said hi to everyone? Did you lock lips with you know who?” Taehyung asked as he wiggled his eyebrows.

You scrunched up your nose and shook your head, “No, I didn’t ‘lock lips with you know who.’ I have yet to see him and hope to god I don’t see him. I’m sure he had long forgotten about me and to be honest I’m okay with that.” You said as you heard some shuffling around behind you and then a voice. That voice bringing a shiver down your spine as it always sounded a bit high pitched, but not in an annoying way, more like a bell or a choir singing to you. The voice was magical that you wished you could hear the voice more often. You just didn’t know if tonight was the night you were going to confess. You and him haven’t talked for over three years. Three years of him going off to college in Seoul and you staying in Busan working because you couldn’t afford college. He had said he would visit, but as time went, he became nonexistent, which in the end broke your heart.

“Don’t see who? Were you trying to avoid someone?” Jimin asked as you all turned to see him dressed up as a vampire. His silver hair tucked back, and his beautiful brown eyes were now red from a pair of contacts you assumed he bought on Amazon.

“No one, don’t worry about it.” You said as you grabbed your drink and decided to explore the house some more. You had to get away from Jimin as your heart started to pound deep within your chest. You were scared. You were breaking. He looked more beautiful than the day he left, and you were sure he wasn’t the pure innocent boy you knew all those years ago.

“Y/n! Wait up! Don’t leave me alone with these assholes!” Kaitlyn said as Taehyung pouted slightly. He was probably the softest out of the small group that was forming in the kitchen. He was cute and funny, always knew when something was wrong, but drunk Taehyung was someone you had to watch out for. He didn’t know how to keep his mouth shut, and honestly, how you were feeling, you didn’t need to have him blab about all the thoughts that were running in your head.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☽◯☾ ⋆⁺₊⋆

“Wow, nice costume, didn’t think you had it in you, but fuck… you look great!” Jungkook smiled as you were now outside hanging with Yoongi, Namjoon, and Jungkook.

“Thanks! It took some getting used, too, but I think with the tights on under the costume, I kinda feel more confident. Not walking around in a bathing suit and feeling half naked, ya know?” You smiled as Yoongi elbowed Namjoon, who seemed to have his mouth open from being in shock at how beautiful you looked in Diane’s clothing.

“You're welcome, where’s Kaitlyn? Did she come with you?” Jungkook asked as he and her sorta had an on and off relationship.

“She’s somewhere. Last I saw, she was with Hoseok, Jimin, and Taehyung. Who’s to say where she is now.” you replied, sipping on the weird concoction Jimin had made in the punch bowl.

“Ah, think she’ll wanna talk?” Jungkook asked as you shrugged your shoulders.

“I don’t know, she was the one that dragged me to this party. Honestly, I wanted to stay home and just watch horror flicks, but here I am…” you said as Namjoon smiled.

“Well, I’m glad you're here. Honestly, I missed seeing you around.” Namjoon spoke as your cheeks reddened from his compliment.

“I miss being around too. It's weird being back here, though. After Jimin left for college, I didn’t think any of us would hang out. I mean, Yoongi got that record deal. You went off to college as well, but stayed here, Jungkook started working along with I.” You began as you honestly didn’t want to remember the night Jimin told you he was leaving and that he wouldn’t be back until he finished. He might visit during the holidays, but when that first christmas came around, you didn’t see him, and you sure in hell didn’t see the others.

“Yeah, life just kinda got busy, but hey, three years isn’t that long, and honestly, having the party here meant there was no way Jimin was skipping this one. I mean, have you seen his place? Its fucking huge!” Namjoon said as a slight shiver went up your spine as the wind picked up out of the blue.

“Here, take this. You’ll feel warmer.” Jungkook said as he gave you his blazer.

“Thanks, Kookie, but I’m okay. I was thinking about heading inside and seeing if I could find Kaitlyn. Think you could come join me?” You asked as everyone sorta shared a look.

“Uh, sure, I can come with you. Is everything okay?” Jungkook asked as you nodded your head. You didn’t know why but just having one of the others nearby gave you comfort. You didn’t see Jimin as a threat, but just having one of the other guys with you while he was around gave you a safe space. You were eventually going to talk to Jimin, you just weren’t ready yet and you didn’t know when you would be ready. You just needed time.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☽◯☾ ⋆⁺₊⋆

“There you are! I was beginning to think you walked home. Hi! How are you?” Kaitlyn asked as you couldn’t believe she was drunk if not close to being drunk.

“Fine, hey uh, where’s Jimin? I need to uh talk to him.” You said as it was about eleven o’clock when you found your friend.

“He went upstairs with some girl who said she wasn’t feeling well… as if… honestly if she wanted to get into Jimin’s pants she could of just said ‘hey I wanna fuck you’ or something, not pretend to be sick just so she could get him alone. I mean would you do something like that? Would you pretend to be sick just to get into Jimin’s pants?”

You shook your head, “No, because I don’t see him that way… and how many drinks have you had already? Where is Taehyung and Hoseok? Weren’t they with you last?” You asked as you looked around for your friends.

“Hobi is with his girlfriend and Tae went to go look for you. Said he really wanted you to go talk to Jimin before it was too late, whatever that means. I know you lik-” You covered Kaitlyn’s mouth before she could talk anymore. Your heart pounding in your chest again as you didn’t need the others and whoever else was around to know you liked him. Sure, you and Jimin were best friends growing up but who’s to say he didn’t find someone while he was off to college. He could have settled on a girl in his class and just couldn’t make it tonight. You just had to find some way around it so your heart could calm down.

“Well, here’s your boyfriend, try not to make a scene okay?” You said as Jungkook smiled at Kaitlyn and then watched as you disappeared upstairs where you were honestly afraid you were going to run into Jimin fucking some random girl, breaking your heart even more.

“So, do you really like her? I mean she’s been avoiding you since she showed up. What kind of person does that?” you heard someone talk as Jimin spoke next.

“Someone who is scared to admit their feelings, but I get it. I just hadn’t had the chance to talk to her since she got here because everyone keeps bothering us. I’m sure we’ll talk eventually but for now…” Jimin paused as the person he was talking with started to giggle, “You need to lay down and get some rest, I’ll come check on you in a little bit.”

The person spoke once more as you felt your heart sink knowing he had been wanting to talk to you since you got here, but everyone kept bothering you two so you were both never alone.

“Well, if you do talk to her, Jiminie, tell her she’s stupid. Tell her the truth and tell her what you feel, because truth be told I feel like you're wasting your time with her. You could be doing so much better and I do mean better…” you rolled your eyes as you knew the person he was talking about was talking about themselves.

“I know, but my heart is set on her and her alone. I just have to get her alone… I just don’t know how..” Jimin said as the floor creaked from underneath you and the door moved just enough for you to see who he was talking to.

“Oh, y/n, hi… um… it's not what it looks like I promise!” the girl in bed said as Jimin was sitting next to her leaned over as if he was going to give her a kiss.

“Right.. Um.. can we talk?” You asked looking Jimin right in the eyes as you felt your heart thud against your rib cage.

“Of course… just give me a second.” he said as you nodded. You walked further down the hall waiting for him. The voices in the room hushed as Jimin walked out and closed the door. His head turned in your direction as the next thing you knew your lips were against his and his arms were around his waist.

“How long?” You asked as the two of you made out in the hallway.

“How long for what?” Jimin asked as he was confused on why he was making out with you, his best friend.

“How long have you liked me?” You questioned one more time as this time you could hear the gears clicking and then a slight whine as you bit his lower lip.

“Since the day I left for college… I knew it when you said your goodbye that I knew my heart belonged to you and only you.” He said as his hands moved up your sides and slowly caged you against the wall you were now pinned against.

“Then why didn’t you say something? Why didn’t you come and visit me during the holidays? Why did you stay away?”

“Because I was scared you didn’t feel the same. I know we had joked about dating and being each other's significant other, but to be clear, it's kinda hard to not fall for… I mean look at you…” He stopped kissing you as he eyed your Seven Deadly Sins costume, “You look stunning in this… you could probably wear anything and look beautiful in it.”

You blushed, “But what if my feelings for you were the same? I mean I just kissed you. Did that not mean anything to you?”

Jimin arched his brow but frowned, “It does, but you have also been drinking and I don’t want your feelings getting mixed because you were under the influence. I mean… if you do like me then I must be the luckiest boy in the world, but if you don’t then I’m in deep shit because I took advantage of you…”

“But I do like you… I’ve always liked you… Why can’t you accept that..” you mumbled as you saw what he meant by being under the influence.

“Because you're drunk, y/n… I know sober you wouldn’t be all handsy on me… you would have rather talked to me than make out with me. I just…” he pressed his forehead against yours as his lips slowly ghosted over yours softly. You could taste the vodka and orange juice but what you were also tasting was his emotions.

“So you're saying you would rather talk about this sober than with alcohol in our systems? That makes sense.” You said as you pushed yourself away from him, making him back up just a bit, “But will you remember this when you are sober?”

Jimin nodded, “Of course… I just hope you do too.”

You frowned looking at him. You swore you didn’t have that much to drink but for being here almost close to midnight and a few drinks in, you could tell that you weren’t completely sober, but you weren’t also drunk either.

“Well, now what? I mean I clearly can’t go home, and I’m sure Kaitlyn is tongue deep in Jungkook’s mouth… Did you want me to catch a cab and talk to you tomorrow?” you asked as your heart sank knowing you could have just had a one night stand and not see Jimin after this all happening.

“No, You can uh… stay here for the night. I just have to kick Veronica out of bed so you have some place to sleep. If not, there's always the guest room.”

You nodded your head, “Will you come hang out with me until I fall asleep? Just so I’m not alone and someone takes you know… advantage of me?”

Jimin looked at you with questionable eyes, “No, but I’ll stay near so I can watch the door, how does that sound?”

You pouted, “Fine, but you better keep a good eye on the door. I don’t want some creep coming in, you hear me?”

Jimin chuckled, “I hear you, I hear you. Let’s get you to bed.” he said as he took you to the guest room and smiled, “I hope you do remember this… I hope you and I can start a new chapter in our lives as a real couple, and I hope you know I do love and care for you..”

“I love and care for you too, Jimin, I-” You were cut off by Jimin’s lips as he smiled. He walked you into the guest bedroom and laid you down as he tucked you in like a child and kissed your forehead telling you good night. The last thing after that was his smile and how you said I love you one more time. You were madly in love with him. Sober or not. You were going to remember this, you just hope he did too.

#bts #bts army #bts x y/n #bts x you #bts x reader #bts park jimin #bts park jimin x reader #bts park jimin x f!reader #bts park jimin x you #bts park jimin x y/n #park jimin #park jimin x you #park jimin x reader #park jimin x f!reader #park jimin x y/n

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waitmyturtles · 1 year

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A lot to process for the fourth episode of Moonlight Chicken, and I’m working through how it connects to the previous episodes and all the themes that I’m trying to catch Aof bringing together.

1) Last night, I reblogged an absolutely incredible meta by @telomeke regarding the meanings of a lot of the Thai-Chinese cultural references in the show, particularly focusing the DVD of Comrades: Almost a Love Story and all the interlaced meanings of the title, story, and music surrounding that movie. I will throw my hands up in the air and hand it to @telomeke and @respectthepetty for further explanations about the Thai-Chinese cultural interchanges throughout the show, but I just want to say that reading that post before watching episode 4 helped me gain a LOT of context that I would have otherwise missed, especially regarding Li Ming.

2) Some quick notes before getting back into Big Things: Mix is so great. He’s just -- so great. His simmering DISDAIN for Alan -- it’s sparkling. I want to know more as to why things ended up so bad with the boi.

3) And First, leaning into Alan’s everything -- anger, jealousy, disappointment, heartbreak. The man can do it all.

4) I don’t know about y’all, but it seemed to me that Earth and Mix were ad libbing the cat food bit, and I was cackling.

5) I love that Aof doesn’t forget us by way of gratuitous shirtlessness (of which I’m still processing as I write my massive meta on Bad Buddy and have Ohm on the mind), but anyway, besides THAT -- I am desperately loving that Li Ming and Heart don’t feel like just a side couple. They really have a significant story going on, including what Heart may process by way of considering studying abroad.

I am in love with the storyline of Li Ming’s kindness, that we get to see that side of him. I might need more time to unwind this, but I wonder if Li Ming is playing the role of the young person with one foot in the old world, and one foot in the new world. When he “comes home” to his uncle to celebrate Jim’s birthday, and Wen nudges him to apologize, it felt to me like the tiniest bit of a prodigal son moment -- he’s a kid in that moment. (And Wen makes that reference about the generation gap in the bedroom to Jim later that night.)

And then we see Li Ming’s utter maturity at the church, bringing Heart to a shared deaf community. And touching the speaker. Just....what a lovely gesture.

6) And speaking of old vs. new, with all apologies to @respectthepetty for warning us to not do this, but I CAN’T HELP IT -- I got a touch of the chills seeing Tian Wen on the floor of the bedroom with Phupha Jim on the bed. Waaah! I got just a few goosebumps.

Okay, so. Per @telomeke‘s analysis, this episode was rooted in Thai-Chinese cultural references, but I also think it was rooted in this one foot in/one foot out dichotomy of old vs. new cultures tugging at each other. Li Ming represents the generation that either will or will not carry the mantle of the old culture forward to modern times. And Jim, quiet Jim -- rooted in the past, of his heartbreak, of his diner, of the culture that his diner represents, and potentially unable to move forward.

I absolutely loved the meditation at the end by the church father. That everyone needs to choose their path in life. You have to be ACTIVE, not PASSIVE, to help determine your fate. And I want to think about juxtaposing that with what Li Ming said to Jim at the start of the episode -- I didn’t ask to be born in this poverty. I was born in this, and I am working my ass off to try to get out of it. Going to America may break the chain. What Li Ming sees is Jim’s inability to be able to break that chain on Jim’s own, because of how firmly Jim is rooted in the past.

Alan comes in to complicate matters vis à vis Jim, but separately -- we also see that Alan himself is rooted in a past that’s filled with pain. And Wen is trying to move from HIS past with Alan as well, and have a new potential future with Jim. I see, in the preview for episode 5, that Alan doesn’t take “I don’t love you anymore” as a reason for Wen to break up with him, which is fascinating. What is rooting Alan so heavily in this non-relationship?

Gaipa is going to lose a significant part of his past, his mother, and will need to move forward either with Jim, or on his own. (Khao did not get a lot of screen time this week, but good LORD, IS HE GOOD.)

And you know what I love that’s such a quiet touch -- Leng and Praew’s pregnancy. The birthing of a next generation, the next step forward in pushing Pattaya’s culture forward. I am always, always a sucker for pregnancy-related symbolism. (Dudes, isn’t Mark Pakin GREAT? I gotta see him in more things!)

I am VERY INTERESTED in what’s being discussed between Jim and Alan for the next episode -- as if Wen were a commodity that Jim could hand back to Alan. I’m kinda thinking there might be some parental ownership issues between Alan and Wen? We’ll see.

Final thoughts: Fourth and Gemini, I REALLY LIKE YOU GUYS, you two are great. What a ridiculous cast.

I’m not going to rate the episodes that clearly don’t have any food in them for the Khao Man Gai Appreciation Rating, but this household DID appreciate the chicken shirt, which I need. GMMTV, the apron and the shirt, I have my credit card ready!

#moonlight chicken #moonlight chicken meta #earth pirapat #mix sahaphap #earthmix #first kanaphan #khaotung thanawat #jim x wen #wen x jim #fourth nattawat #gemini norawit

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myers-meadow · 2 years

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Planetarium: Bo Sinclair x reader

Title: Planetarium

Summary: Being Vincent's partner was delightful, as long as it lasted. But things feel off with him, and Ambrose is small. Bo is there to share a cigarette with, and perhaps a little more.

Warnings: Angst and fluff. Themes of betrayal. Cigarettes, alcohol. Little about reader's appearance is mentioned. No explicit descriptions of any kind (not violence, not smut), but there are canon-typical subjects of kidnapping, killing and such. Sfw.

Word count: 3240

It started with a cigarette. I took it from the packet that Bo left on the dinner table after we finished washing up and took it outside. The sun was setting, casting a dim orange hue over the sky. By then, going outside was allowed and I was no longer watched insistently – although Bo could still get suspicious at times. Taking that cigarette and sinking down on the bench on the porch, overlooking the back garden and the woods, I fiddled with a lighter.

The door clattered when he stepped through, my heart sank when I saw it wasn’t Vincent.

“You smoke? That’s new,” Bo said and the bench creaked as he sat down next to me.

“I used to, you know,” I responded, shrugging, still messing with the lighter. Staring at me for another second, then he took the lighter from my hands, flicked it on. I breathed in and the spark caught on.

“Your nails are too long,” he said. Lit himself one too with practiced movements.

“Yeah.”

We sat in silence, watching the sun disappear behind the tree line, smoking.

He cast a glance my way, before speaking. “What’s on your mind, sugar?”

I sighed, exhaled, watched the embers. “You notice Vince’s been off lately? He won’t see me much these days.”

Bo raised his eyebrows. “But he’s crazy ‘bout you.”

“He didn’t talk to you?” I asked. He shook his head. “It feels like he’s been avoiding me. We’ve barely spoken since last week.”

“Ah. Thought he just had a lot on his plate.”

I shrugged. “Don’t we all?”

Bugs buzzed around, heavy bumblebees flew from weed to weed. The garden wasn’t particularly pretty, nor well-kept, but the blackberry bushes and the apple trees gave a good harvest each year. Vincent promised we could try strawberries next year, my favourite. Have Lester go into town for them, make him marmalade and pies in the summer as a thank-you. Lester liked sweet things. Another sigh wracked my body. The questions piled on top of each other, mixing with fears, insecurities, uncertainty. A mosquito landed on my knee, I killed it with one good slap.

“Strawberries would be good,” I mumbled. My hand stung from the impact and I rubbed the spot I hit, then flicked the dead thing into the grass. “Vince said we could try planting them before winter hits. Too bad there won’t be a next year.”

“What ya mean?”

“I mean, if he dumps me, I doubt you’ll let me stay, or live,” I stared at him, watching his surprise.

“Hey now, that’s rather drastic, ain’t it, doll? Wouldn’t want ya to worry about that.” With a good-natured grin, he bumped his shoulder into mine.

“Thanks,” I said, without feeling it, staring at the last rays of light that hit the trees.

Breakfast with Bo in silence, no Vincent. Everything felt heavier when he wasn’t there. When putting the plates in the sink, Bo grabbed my arm.

“Come with me to the station, keep your mind off of things.”

It was a calm day, much like those before I was allowed alone and before Vincent took interest in me. The easiest things to do back then were to busy my hands and follow instructions. This led to cleaning cars, handing them tools, sweeping the floor, stirring wax as it melted in the pot; working alongside them in silence. With time, Bo became more talkative, as did I.

His most recent project was another car, left by the tourists that passed by less than a week ago. A reasonably new one, probably borrowed from one of their parents.

Once I saw the interior of the car, it was clear why he asked me to come. It was littered with empty bottles of Aperol, candy wrappers and sour-smelling beer cans. Crumbs all over the seat and something sticky was spilled over the dashboard. Clearing it out and throwing it in the trashcan was easy. The scrubbing part wasn’t my favourite.

“You’re quiet today,” Bo remarked, from below by the wheels. He cleaned the mud off of the tires and the wheels, before moving on to change the plates. He stretched and threw the rag back into the bucked with soapy water.

I ducked my head inside the car again, plucked a red thong off the backseat. “So are you.”

He gave half a grin, before I stretched the elastic of the thong and flung it at his head. He ducked and it hit the wall behind him, falling onto the workbench.

“Naughty tourists.” Bo grabbed the thing, pinching it between two fingers, before throwing it back at me, grinning the dimples in his cheeks. I caught it and dropped it in the trash.

“The one with the curly hair was cute,” I said, “don’t think she was the type for thongs, though.”

He raised his eyebrows. “They were an interesting bunch, that’s for sure. Spoiled brats.”

“You said the same about me back then.” I shrugged, aware I shouldn’t push him with remarks that dredge up the past like that, but it seemed my brain wouldn’t stop.

It was his turn to grimace, he dried his hands and approached me. “Even so, you proved us wrong.”

He stopped in front of me, a squeeze of the shoulder, before he trailed his fingers over my collarbone, up my neck. It was never entirely comfortable when he came close like this, always a dangerous edge, always Vincent or their stupid rivalry on the back of my mind.

“Doll, look at me.” His calloused fingers reached my chin, pushing it up.

I did, forcing my eyes to his. Bright blue, framed by dark brows and something brewing within – something dark I didn’t care to know. “Ain’t nothing gonna happen to you.”

Quickly, I nodded. Seems like Bo was less sensitive to Vincent’s moods than I was, despite knowing him for longer. Perhaps because he knew him longer. Or perhaps he knew something I didn’t know.

Bo stepped away and I could breathe again. “Get some lemonade from the cooler, will ya?”

“Sure thing, Bo,” and my voice almost sounded normal.

Mustering up the courage was one thing, but my knees felt week as I descended the stairs to the basement. The door was locked, as expected, as he often did when he hid his ongoing projects from prying eyes, so I knocked.

“Vincent, love, please let me in,” I tried, knocking another few times. Soft classical music spilled from the cracks, too low in volume to make out which piece it was. Immediately after I spoke, it was joined by other sounds. The echo of something wooden that creaked. I slapped my hand in front of my mouth and my back hit the wall.

It's not what you think, it’s not what you think.

I found Bo in the living room, silently pried the packet of cigarettes from his breast pocket and took it outside, barely hearing his protests. He followed me to the porch, taking back the packet and holding my shaking hands in his. The roughness of his callouses grounded me. Finally I could look in his eyes.

“What’s gotten you like this?” he asked, voice low. I only shook my head.

“Just- just got a lot on my mind.” Shaky breaths. The sounds from the basement- it was exactly the same as when Vince took me there, strapped me down and fucked me over the workbench. It was one of his favourite places to have me, where he felt most confident.

He gave my hand a squeeze, then planted a cigarette between my fingers, lit it for me, then his own. “That’s alright. We don’ have to talk.”

He stared straight ahead the entire time we sat there. After the cigarettes there were beers. Never once did he look at me, and I trusted him more than I ever had.

In the morning I went down much earlier than normal; couldn’t sleep. Vincent tiptoed around in the kitchen and the wave of relief I felt was quickly shaken off by what happened the day before.

“Hey Vince,” I greeted him, voice soft and low from sleep. “We’ve barely seen each other, I miss you.”

He turned around to see me, gave a simple wave, coffee in hand, and attempted to pass by me around the kitchen table. I grabbed his sleeve. A dangerous game.

“Also, Bo wanted to know when you’ll be done with the statues, since you said you wanted to try some different mechanics in making them move and stuff. Could be a bit of an undertaking.” I shrugged. Released his arm.

Vince signed his answer. “Could be a while still. We’ll see each other tonight, yes?”

I tried a smile, “yeah, tonight.”

Not even a hug, I thought, as he retreated down the stairs again.

A few days went by. I cried a little less then, but sleeping was still difficult. Bo was a rock. Having to say that ‘see you tonight’ implied that I actually expected Vincent to keep his word. Even despite knowing it in my gut, my brain already tried rationalising what I heard when I went down to the basement. Most days that week I went with Bo to help him with the car. After that one was repaired, cleaned, changed enough to make it less noticeably stolen – he took it away to sell. After that was handled, it was quiet.

The mornings were me, stewing, alone, in the chair in the living room. Bo slept in when he could, when there was less work to do, which there was, now that the car was done. The afternoons were us doing chores together, or side by side, and we ate dinner at the table.

Then, a Tuesday, Bo came back after dinner, dusk already passed, he motioned to me.

“Wanna show ya somethin’,” he grinned, taking me by the hand, letting me grab my coat before heading out the door. He carried an old floral blanket over his arm. “It’s not too bad of a walk.”

“Where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise, sweets.”

His mischievous mood was infectious and I smiled without noticing.

“Oooh, a surprise,” I said. “Let’s go then.”

The dimples in his cheeks standing out more in the last light of the sun, he gave my arm a pull to make me hurry up. “Yes, come on.”

Still jogging at a lazy pace, we reached the middle of town, the church looming ahead of us, only a silhouette as the last light disappeared. My lungs took in gulps of cold, damp night air. The Museum stood, waiting like a gaping mouth.

“The museum; that’s your surprise?” I chuckled, but he just gripped my hand tighter and pulled me to the back of the building. “And why are the street lights off?

“When Vince and I made this town into what it is today, we wanted to make sure we still had enough spots, like to get away to.” Letting go of my hand, he grabbed a metal ladder that laid discarded in the tall grass behind the museum, and righted it against the side of the building.

“The roof?” I asked, with some sense of disbelief. He tested the security of the ladder and then gestured for me to climb it.

“Ladies first,” and with that handsome smile, I’d do just about anything.

It was only natural to distrust the wax a little, but it was perfect, just as the other rooms inside the museum.

“Catch!” Bo called from down there, and messily threw the blanket at me. I barely caught it by the hem and pulled it up, already laying it out over the sandy wax roof, brushing away dead leaves to make space for it. The ladder creaked as Bo came up, and he scooted over to help spread out the blanket.

“So this is your spot?” I asked, looking around. It was nice, such a high vantage point over Ambrose. There was a case of beer and a bottle of wine to the side. Bo dragged them closer, bottle in hand.

“Something like that, yeah.” He twisted the cap from the wine bottle and held it out for me. Inside the case were two glasses. “We can start with wine, I know beer ain’t your favourite.”

“Very kind of you to remember.” I held the glasses as he poured it. “Ho, stop, that’s more than enough,” I chuckled. “You prepared this? With the blanket and all.”

He took a first sip of wine, folded his legs underneath him and pulled a sour face. “Ah, that’s disgusting. Don’t know how you and Vince drink this stuff.”

“Beer isn’t much better.”

“But to answer your question; yes, I did. Though you’d need a moment like this. Can’t really get away from it all, but this is nice, right? Come.” He pat the blanket again, set his glass down, then took mine from me to set next to his. Then he laid down flat, eyes unreadable. As I sank next to him, I saw what he meant. The stars. Hundreds of them. Some glistened brightly, others were dim, and their colours varied. Red, white, yellow, blue, orange…

Speechless, feeling deeply touched by his considerate gesture, I blinked away tears.

“Bo, I’m- this is incredible.”

“There’s little light pollution out here, if we leave all the street lights off,” he said, voice normal, but when I looked to my left, there was something unexplainable in his expression. Perhaps it was just the darkness that cast strange shadows. To avoid it, I looked back up, mesmerised.

We finished the first glass of wine – him only drinking half of it before pouring the rest into my glass – in silence, looking up at the night sky. The air cooled down, but it was just about comfortable once I buttoned up my coat. The second glass went easier, warming the blood in my cheeks. He cracked open a beer and pulled the packet of smokes from his breast pocket.

“Want one?” he said, as his already dangled from his lip. With a vague nod from me, he held one out for me, as I pressed it between my lips much the same as he did. With the flick of the lighter, his hair tickled my temple as we both leaned in to light the cigarette.

The silence returned again as we smoked slowly, letting most of it burn to ash, tapping them against Bo’s old glass as a makeshift ashtray. After that, the wine tasted different, but it was still wine.

My eyes kept returning to the same stars, only to have them dim when looking directly at them. The entirety of the sky was almost overwhelming, and having been out in the dark so long made it not resemble anything of a normal night. It was as if being awake for the first time in months. Of experiencing the world how you do when you travel, how even the simplest things feel special. Words of beauty wouldn’t describe it, beauty was irrelevant – it was an awe so deep I felt it under the skin. I sighed deeply, emptying out all the old air that resided in my lungs. Sat up to replenish the wine, then laid back down. Along with it all was a heaviness I did my best to shove away, and as I looked at the depth of the sky, it was all so far away.

Once again my eyes trailed over to the side, catching sight of Bo’s profile. Not often I got to see his face at rest. Older too, noticeably older than the early 20s college students we had out here a week or two ago. Years would flow by out here, leaving their marks on him. I opened my mouth to say something without even knowing what, and he turned his head, catching me before I could form any words. His eyes crinkled as he smiled widely. One of the arms he had folded underneath his head extended and he brushed over my temple, then trailing to my eyebrow and I let my eyes flutter close as he explored my face. The rustling of clothes as he shifted. His fingers almost tickled on my cheek as he followed the shape of it, and that of old acne scars. A waft of his scent, something like wood, warmth, and the smell of tobacco on the tips of his fingers.

“Tell me to stop,” he said, a sudden break in the silence, but it barely registered before his lips touched mine. It took a moment to kiss him back. I never thought he’d be soft like this. A dog with all bark and no bite. A nudge of his hand under my chin was enough to make me open my lips for him, to feel the scrape of his tongue against mine. He only pressed closer and closer, letting me taste him deeper, letting our teeth clash – the curve of his lips as he smiled into the kiss.

He cursed as he lifted himself up to lean over me, making sure not to lean on my hair – almost annoyed with having to break the kiss. We re-joined and something swirled inside me, stringing along into gut and liver and spleen, something that was deeply a part of me for a long time. It all jumbled together. As it got difficult to breath, panting into his mouth from the force of his kisses, the denim of his jacket scratching my collar bones, it was my lungs that the feeling invaded. After that, into the stomach, and it twisted and turned around the new nervous feeling and the abundance of wine.

Bo sighed as he pulled back for breath, eyes half-lidded, wearing a lazy smile, letting his accent drawl more than usual: “How can you feel so right?”

And I believed him. The charmer, the scheming face of Ambrose, the one who isn’t to be trusted – in that moment he was all I ever wanted.

My fingers tangled in his hair as I pulled him back down to me, biting down on his bottom lip. A calloused thumb pressed my mouth open further, giving him free reign to explore. My other hand at his hip, feeling the warmth of his skin as I pulled his shirt up, feeling the muscle that laid over his back. He nuzzled his nose against mine, opening his eyes to look at me and I did the same. How could it feel as though we have the same will? This was new, but it felt like coming home. Fingertips followed the indent of his spine, up and down to the waistband of his jeans.

“Bo, I-”

“Shh, not now,” he said softly, kissing me again. I dug my nails in, pulling him as close as I could.

“More,” I said, and he chuckled, before kissing his way to my ear.

“Only if you sleep by my side tonight,” his hot breath ticking the sensitive skin and warming me in places I shouldn’t feel so heated from such a simple action. Hand kneading a breast through layers of fabric.

“Always,” I answered, breathless. Over his shoulder there were the stars, countless and without any consideration of life on earth. Tomorrow I won’t wake with the same hope, but the feeling that crawled its way into my heart will rest easy in his arms.

#bo sinclair #vincent sinclair #bo sinclair x reader #vincent sinclair x reader #house of wax fanfic #angst #bo sinclair angst #bo sinclair fluff #meadow's writing #slashers #slasher x reader #slasher fandom #house of wax #slasher community #fluff

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maddiesbookshelves · 1 month

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Akata appreciation post and manga haul 📚

I didn't buy all of them at once but I did buy them pretty recently

Love Mix-Up is almost over in France, only 2 volumes left! And I started buying Boys Run the Riot because I realised I could spend my money now, especially on stuff I really loved reading digitally

Once again, Akata is THE manga publisher to me, they're always coming out with amazing titles, a lot of them with queer themes and storylines. They're even going to publish She Loves to Cook, She Loves to Eat (my review here) in France, which is amazing. Even when their titles aren't queer, they're amazing: Night view on the Factory was just zjfjzuej (look up the TW though). They're a small but passionate team and it really shows that they love what they're doing

Anyways, if you're curious what these are about:

My post about Boys Run the Riot

My post about Love Mix-Up

Entre Nos Mains

English title: Run Away With Me, Girl

Original title: Kakeochi Girl / かけおちガール

Genres: Drama, Romance, Slice of Life

Themes: Adultery, Homosexuality

Japanese volumes: 16 (Finished)

Maki’s first love was her high school classmate, a girl named Midori. But Midori broke up with Maki at graduation, saying they were now “too old to be fooling around dating girls.” Ten years later, Maki still can’t get Midori off her mind, and when the two women reconnect after a chance encounter, Maki realizes that, while her feelings haven’t changed, Midori has long moved on—in fact, she’s engaged. Yet the more Maki hears Midori talk about her soon-to-be-husband, the more red flags she notices...

Absolutely fell in love with the art and then the story punched me in the guts in the best way. The characters are complex and while they may not be entirely lovable, they are wholly human. And I really loved that

Some trigger warnings apply though, so I'll list the ones that come to mind*: cheating, domestic violence, gaslighting, misogyny, internalised homophobia

*Note that those are the ones I remember from what little I've read of this story and other TW may apply. Please try to look up a more complete list if you have any doubts. Take care of yourself ✨

#manga haul #book haul #akata #i love this publishing house so much i'm willing to give their isekai a try #i HATE isekai with a passion #boys run the riot #my love mix up #love mix up #entre nos mains #run away with me girl #kakeochi girl #books #booklr #booklr community #manga #manga recs #manga recommendation #queer manga #lgbt+ manga

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checkoutmybookshelf · 3 months

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He's Just a Herald and He's On Fire!

So, if there is one consistent theme with protagonists in Mercedes Lackey's Valdemar universe, it's that there is a STARTLING number of them who are misfits in their families, misunderstood, and a little anxious and melancholic about the whole thing. You'd think that this would get boring fast, but Lackey manages to mix up the details enough that they don't meld together in my head, and in point of fact, I have actual favorites. One of whom we are talking about today. That's what this post is for. Lan Chitward is one of my favorite herald protagonists. Let's talk Brightly Burning.

Hi, hello, welcome. If this is your first time on my blog, please be warned that this is A SPOILERIFIC ZONE. I will SPOIL THE CRAP OUT OF THIS BOOK. Consider yourself warned.

Y'all, I am a Shakespeare scholar, so if I ever post anything along the lines of "Tragedies suck and I hate them," please send help, I've been kidnapped. Your girl LOVES a good tragedy, and that's really what this book is: An Amazing Tragedy. But that's just the end for Herald Lavan Firestorm and his Companion Kalira.

At the beginning of this book, we meet Lavan "Lan" Chitward, ugly ducking son of a pair of extremely prosperous merchants who feels ignored, misunderstood, and transplanted from the place that made him happiest. Kiddo has zero desire to follow either of his parents into their trades, so when they hit their wits' ends, said parents send Lan to a merchant-run school so Lan can find himself a direction in life that he feels will suit him.

Lan's parents might not be able to empathize or communicate with their son, but they did try to set him up for success. They tried. They get a couple of points for that. Not a lot. But a couple.

Unfortunately for Lan, he gets to discover the downsides of private school firsthand when he is relentlessly and cruelly bullied by older students. Lan's anxiety and very real, rational fear of bodily and social harm get so bad that to save his life, his Firestarting Gift explodes out of his control. By the time the smoke clears, four boys are dead and Lan is being carted up to the palace to explain to Herald Pol what on earth had been happening in his school and how the fire started. Stress from being questioned makes Lan lose control again, but before he can start a second killer fire, Kalira chooses Lan. Handily, Kalira is the daughter of Pol's companion, Satiran, so Pol is aware from the jump that Lan is more than just Kalira's Choice: The two are lifebonded.

Go nuts, Ao3.

However, this is about when the members of the heraldic circle start looking at each other sideways and going, "oh no. Firestarting Gifts usually only pop up when we're going to need them..." So while Lan is getting tutored by Pol, Kalira, his new best friend Tuck, and Pol's daughter Eleanor, Karse is causing trouble at the border--like preparing to invade and burn all the heralds to death trouble. Karse is not your friend, and their sun priests tend to target heralds and healers, and the only thing worse than being killed by Karsite troops is being taken alive to be burned at the stake or--for healers--be forced to use your gift until you burn out and die. So: Bad Situation.

Ultimately, the command decision is made to send Lan to the front. Lan at this point is an emotionally unstable, half-trained at best trainee herald. The poor kid is getting yeeted into a situation he is absolutely unprepared to handle. Before he and Pol even MAKE it to the front, they're attacked by a scout group and Pol is blinded--put a pin in that, we're going to come back to it. So Lan gets to the front already traumatized and somewhat sans his trusted mentor. It's not good.

Ultimately, the title of this book comes back to haunt Lan and Kalira: they burn, too brightly. Kalira takes an arrow in battle to save Lan, and in his grief and rage, Lan unleashes his final strike, taking out the Karsite army, an entire pine forest, and even some of his own soldiers--firestorms are hard to aim. Lan is posthumously raised to full Herald rank, and losing their entire army puts Karse on the shelf. It's the very definition of a pyrrhic victory, however. Lan burned himself out at age sixteen. He was a half-trained child doing his level best, and he was put in a situation that he was objectively unready for. It's heartbreaking, it's tragic...it's WONDERFULLY done.

The entire time you're reading this book and falling in love with Lan and Kalira, you're thinking "they'll be alright, won't they? They have to be alright." But you have enough other beloved characters that you get to know well enough that you also get to mourn with them once Lan and Kalira are gone. You get pulled into this story and you just want to hug Lan and stick him somewhere safe. This is one of my favorite Valdemar books, no question.

This is where I want to just briefly come back to Herald Pol and the attack that costs him his sight. I have no objection about the context in which this occurs. Shit happens in war. It's tragic, it's traumatic, it COMPLETELY SUCKS, but there aren't any red flags in terms of how Pol is disabled. There is also a fairly realistic period in which Pol is trying to adjust to not having sight. He also can see through Satiran's eyes for short periods of time because magic, but since this comes with a cost in energy and magic and doesn't inherently negate the disability, we're still fine. It's an emergency stopgap measure, not a functional cure. So far, so fine.

Unfortunately, there are a couple of things I don't love about how Pol's blinding is handled. The first thing is a bit "your mileage may vary" rather than a genuinely harmful negative representation, but it threw up a faint red flag when I was reading, so I'm talking about it. Traumatic injuries are so described for a reason; people have very very valid feelings and reactions to being suddenly and violently disabled, and part of adjusting is having the time and space to work through those feelings. Now. Pol and Lan are literally in a war zone, they are indispensably important figures, so they can't just be sent home. There also kind of isn't time and space to deal with the emotions in a war zone. All of that is fair enough. It would suck to have to just swallow the feels and keep functioning, and that could even lead to some good narrative tension.

That's not what happens though.

I'll just give you the text from the book for this bit:

Some time during the ride to headquarters, Pol had made up his mind on several points; it had given him relief from the pain to work things logically through in that way. Losing his eyesight was not going to be a tragedy, and if Ilea could not Heal him, then he would simply accept that. The events of the evening only confirmed that belief. He worked through everything as logically as he could during the ride, and during that night and the day and night that followed, in his dreams he was able to employ a technique called directed dreaming to work through things emotionally. It wasn't easy; he exhausted himself all over again, weeping for what he had lost and raging against everyone involved, including himself. But it had to be done, and quickly, and dreams were the best and least harmful place to do so.

I'm not going to say that his experience as a Herald and soldier don't give this some credibility, and I'm not going to say that narrative compression isn't a thing that writers can and do use to get characters from emotional point a to point b, but this stretched my credibility just a skooch and made me go, "They're going to keep him blind, right?"

Reader, they healed him at the end of the book. Can we PLEASE let him live a full herald life while blind??? He was no less effective without his sight than with it, and A LITTLE PHYSICAL DISABILITY REP AMONG THE ACTIVE-DUTY HERALDS WOULD BE LOVELY. Plenty of them live with anxiety, depression, hypervigilance, or other mental health challenges, but heaven forbid a herald have a physical disability.

This is a pattern I'm noticing more and more in books. Soldiers and soldier-adjacent characters can experience mental illness and disability, but not physical. It's that really annoying mind-body split looming large, and I don't have a good solution for this other than letting active duty characters also have physical disabilities, rather than having them be cured, retired, or in roles that never require them to be in the field. And I do get that like...if you are physically disabled, your best bet is not to be in a fight, but that's not how LIFE works. Sometimes the fight comes to you, or your expertise is needed in the field. It happens. LET IT.

Other than my growing frustration with disability rep in military, military-adjacent, and martial-esque organizations in fiction, I love this book to little tiny pieces. It's a beautifully executed tragedy without being self-indulgent or unnecessarily maudlin.

#mercedes lackey #valdemar #heralds of valdemar #herald mages #burning brightly #lan chitward #lavan firestorm #heralds and companions #adult fantasy #fantasy novel #books and reading #books & libraries #books and novels #books #book recommendations #disability representation #kill or cure

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jamiesfootball · 6 months

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apologies if this has been asked/answered/referenced somewhere i haven't seen but where did the title for 'oh god, you're gonna get it (you have not been given love)' come from??? every time i see/read it i feel like i've read something inherently profound. if you came up with it you're even more of a poet and a genius than reading the fic had led me to believe - which was a lot lol (seriously it's so good, literally how???????????????????? i feel like this title is haunting me and the fic has definitely caused some level of brain rot)

THANK YOU FOR SAYING IT GAVE YOU BRAIN ROT. I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO FLATTERED.

The closest I have come to talking bout the title is here but at that point the title was still redacted on my posts so I'd say that barely counts!

So this is going to be long. Do try to bear with me, I've done my best.

The title is pieced together from two different song lyrics, but I think I did an excellent job in both picking a title that echoes the themes AND in smushing it together to make something new.

Oh god you're gonna get it is from Florence + The Machine's 'Girls Against God', which is one of those songs that came on when I was deep in the blorbo feels and they imprinted on the song so now that song just is a Roy Kent song to me, with many parts of it speaking to the vibe I wanted to bring into this fic. The quiet helplessness, the barely restrained incandescent rage -- all set against tragic, mundane life.

What I love most about this part of the title is that it's so loaded with meaning. Because 'oh god you're gonna get it' can read as 'oh god, you will understand'. Is it reassurance? Is it telling someone that it's okay if you're confused and lost now, because in the future they will understand?

Is it foreshadowing? Is it a warning? 'Oh enjoy you're obliviousness and confusion now, because one day it will make sense and you will understand. Oh god, will you ever understand.'

Then we have the part of the song that contains the title:

Oh God, you're gonna get it You'll be sorry that you messed with us

And here it becomes a threat of violence, and echo of rage acting against outside forces.

So that's part 1 of the title.

The nested part of the title, the part in parenthesis, is 'you have not been given love' by A Balladeer. Now, this song is more vibes than lyrics, though it does have some echoing ideas towards Jamie regarding generational trauma. That mixed with the lamenting tonality with which it's sung made this one really stick out.

Well, that and the fact that the title is repeated no less than sixteen fucking times. You can see why it was stuck in my head, yes?

Again, though, the lyric when taken at face-value feels loaded with meaning. On the one hand, it's someone recognizing, 'oh, I understand now. there have been circumstances in your life that have brought you to were you are now, and how you are able to perceive love has been directly affected by how you have not received it before.' But then it's also saying 'hey, those things you lived through, those things that other people gave you. those weren't love. you know that right?' And finally it's an understanding about someone, 'oh, you are an unfed thing. you do not know what love is, because you have never been given it'

Even if you take each part of the song piecemeal, with each section representing a different character, you end up with a fascinating tension. But if we combine the two we get this reverberation between the getting and the given. 'You will get', and nested with it 'you have not been given'. You will get your understanding (that you have not been given love). Oh god you will understand (that you are an unloved thing). You will make them pay (for they did not give you love). And most importantly

Oh god you're gonna to get (the love you were not given)

#I hope this makes sense #thank you so much for your wonderful message - I quite literally thought about it all day #and I'm glad you've enjoyed my one very very long chapter so far!#fic: oh god you're gonna get it (you have not been given love)#ask box is always open #fic testimonials

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nocturnalghoul · 9 months

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Back to haunt me once again

Remember how I said I had thoughts about murder ghoul’s playing with their prey like a cat with a mouse? This is that. I kept it pretty broad but if that is not something you are into I totally get it and I will be back to my normal bullshit afterwards (my next plan is super sweet fluff lol). These are a mix of little thought blurbs and ficlets

PLEASE READ THE WARNING BELOW

Like I said these are murder ghoul thoughts so general warnings of violence/blood/gore/excessive cruelty apply. Lots of mentions of being chased or hunted. A few of them get tortuous with their intended target. A few of the blurbs about certain ghouls have additional stuff beyond what is implied by murder ghoul, but I placed general themes next to the ghoul’s name so that you can know to skip that section and head to the next ghoul if it is something that will bother you. If there is anything else that needs to be added as a warning please tell me! I tried to think it over but there is always a chance I missed something

Words: ~4k of murder ghoul AU cruelty below the cut.

Title from Hunters Moon (omg I actually used a Ghost song for something I wrote about Ghost? How have I gotten this far without doing so yet)

General thoughts:

For the ghouls hunting is not even really a matter of consuming their prey. Sure that is a convenient way to dispose of the evidence, but the thrill is in the hunt itself. Rarely are their hunts quick matters, instead drawing out over hours if not even occasionally weeks. The entire point is to satiate that hunter’s instinct deep inside of them itching to burst out and blow off some steam.

Each ghoul scratches that itch in their own personalized ways. Sometimes these are things that mesh well with the another ghoul's particular brand of torment, and sometimes something all of their own. No matter what it ends with happy satiated ghouls so most of those in charge choose to sweep it under the rug.

The sole occasional complaints on the matter come from Copia. He loves his ghouls dearly and would never dream of stopping their natural instincts, he only wishes that they would stop leaving remnants of their kills for him in his office like stray cats leaving their owner a bird on the front porch.

He knows the ghouls are doing it out of love and respect for the man, simply caught up in the emotional payoff of the hunt and wanting to share with him, so he makes sure to never be mad at them. However, that doesn’t stop him from politely reminding them each time it happens that while he appreciates the gesture he would rather they didn’t. The ghouls try their hardest to remember this, but still are prone to forgetting as they get lost in the roar inside their minds after a successfully completed hunt.

~~~

Swiss: shadowy figures; danger of the woods

Swiss prefers to hunt in the daylight, but sometimes it simply didn’t work out that way and he had to make do. Being a multi ghoul was a huge benefit in this luckily. While his larger tricks normally played off of whatever element he was primarily attuned with at the time, his options were sort of limitless. Even when focused on one element he still could bring in small bursts of the other elements to help him along.

Swiss always loves to hear the other ghoul’s hunting stories because they serve as excellent motivation and inspiration for what exactly he can do. Oftentimes he will borrow from another ghouls playbook and add his own twist to it, coming back to the pack to share the results. These however are only used in dire situations when he just can’t keep the instinct down anymore and has to start his hunt now.

Something is needed to fill the space between all those elements and tie the multi ghouls magic together. Between all those gaps are pure shadows. Sure all the fancy tricks of multiple elements are fun, but that shadow deep inside of him is why he prefers daytime hunting. Most consider themselves safer in the daylight but he is more than happy to capitalize on that assumption.

Today he is tracking somebody from the nearby town who was silly enough to wander into the deep woods separating the abbey from everyone else. He starts with simple elemental mishaps, a sudden unexpected hole in the ground or increasing the already sweltering summer heat inside the immediate area. He lets the man get more and more concerned about the fate of his adventure.

Once the man seems worried is when he finally lets glimpses of himself be seen. A shadowy figure there one moment then gone the next. A distant menacing form lurching forwards with just enough purpose to make it clear the malicious intent.

The chase is fun as always. Swiss lets the man slowly gain a lead until he breaks into a small clearing, stopping to look at the patch of trees behind him. It’s at that moment that Swiss steps into the shadow of a tree and disappears as if he stepped into a massive hole.

The man relaxes, rationalizes that he must have been seeing things and had nothing to worry about. The second that relieved gasp escapes his target’s lips, Swiss steps out from the man’s shadow, all sharp fangs and cold eyes.

“Ya know, it's not polite to run off without saying hello”

~~~~

Sunny: vision manipulation

If Swiss loves to utilize shadow for his hunts, Sunny is the opposite. It took her a while to figure it out, but her air/fire multi nature could be combined to manipulate light. It leads to her being the ghoul that Swiss most often asks to accompany him on hunt. She manipulates the light, creating or changing shadows for Swiss to play with.

She does more than fine enough on her own though. Sudden beams of light bearing down on somebody always adds a nice discombobulated element to her general pursuits allowing her extra time to play with her target.

Today though she is excited to try out something new. It was brought to her attention by Copia that sight is very much a light based activity and her mind has been running wild ever since.

This time she herds her prey for hours, a rouge wildfire here, a dissuading wind there, a few bright flashes along the way. Finally when she gets them where she wants them, bloodied and mildly burnt from their long struggle staring in horror as she stalks closer, she tries out her plan.

In an instant the person's head starts whipping around in confusion.

“Sorry about that lovely one, turns out you can’t see if no light makes it into the eyeballs” she lilts sweet as day with a soft chuckle. The blind stumbling around that the human in front of her insists on is almost cute, like a scared newborn animal trying to find its way. This is definitely going to be her new favorite game to play.

~~~

Rain: blood manipulation; massive bleeding; loss of body control

The human body is 60% water, most people forget that. As much fun as Rain has out in the lake sometimes using his element to his advantage in his hunting, there were much more personal ways to have fun with it. Instead of the long chases that some of the ghoul’s enjoy, he could often get that cruel predatory instinct worked out within a small area.

This sister of sin didn’t even hesitate to follow the pretty water ghoul deep into the woods. He barely finished asking if she would accompany him to Mountain’s cabin in the woods for the evening before she was blushing, enthusiastically shaking her head yes. He later overheard her gushing to her singular friend she had made since joining recently that one of the ghouls was interested in her. Both siblings had been debating leaving recently but between Rain’s plans tonight and Dew’s plans with the other sister it seemed the decision would be made for them sooner rather than later.

He is in the mood for a drawn out process tonight, but there is plenty of time. The two are laid out on a blanket staring at the stars when the sister excuses herself to head inside for a moment. Halfway to the door her body freezes midstep, sending her tumbling to the ground.

“Oh no sister, are you okay?” Rain asks, voice laced with fake concern before releasing the magical hold over her body.

The sister stands up and brushes herself off, flushing embarrassed as he tries to figure out what happened. As she attempts to skitter off once again, her body freezes again, muscles traitorously taking her back towards Rain laid out on the blanket.

“I see you didn’t need to leave after all” Rain notes with fake consideration as he pilots her body back towards him. Finally the sister gets her wits about her enough to start crying as she struggles against the hold on her blood and various body water that Rain is exerting.

Once the crying starts, Rain finally drops the facade, rolling his eyes and watching the young woman collapse as he stops her blood flow momentarily, causing her to black out.

As she comes back, seeing the predatory look in the water ghouls eye, he can tell she realizes there is no going back to the now far away abbey. The look of understanding that dawns on the woman's face is even tastier than he is sure her blood will be later tonight.

Now that the taste of her blood is on the mind he can’t help but take a tiny taste, leaning over to where she lay in the dirt to make a tiny knick with his claw.

He encourages the blood to hasten its escape momentarily, gushing faster than should be possible before he collects it in the empty wine glass the sibling left sitting on the blanket. Once it’s full enough he slows the current of blood back down to a tiny trickle. He did want to take his time tonight, forcing the girl to bleed out before his fill of fun does nothing to further that objective.

The sip of blood mixed with the soft undernote of leftover wine tastes luxurious. He allows himself one more as he considers what plan to pursue tonight. Maybe a little blood loss confusion, maybe cut off circulation to her legs, the possibilities felt endless.

~~~

Dew: burns and temperature manipulation; neurotrauma

Rain wasn’t the only ghoul to have fun with blood, he did have to learn it from somebody afterall. Ever since his transition though, Dew tended to play with it in a different way, mixing his fire with the last remains of water inside of him to create a blood boiling effect. That tended to end things far too quickly however, so it was not currently on the table for tonight.

He watched the sibling of sin shift uncomfortably in her seat as she fanned herself. Dew had slowly been raising her internal temperature 0.1 degree at a time over the last twenty minutes but finally was beginning to get impatient.

“Oh no, is it too hot in here? My room tends to stay cooler, maybe we should head back there” he innocently suggested. He wanted to increase how quickly this was moving along, and luckily he had made small enough a change for the sister to only feel slightly uncomfortable so far.

It was clear that she thought he was trying to make a move on her and had probably organized for the room to be hot so he could whisk her away. She giggled before following him to his room, immediately making herself comfortable in a big chair in the corner of the room.

He released the increased temperature and smiled when she visibly relaxed further.

All at once he cranked her internal temperature up drastically, taking in the way her face contorted as she shifted back past overly warm to shivering with a high grade fever.

“Oh you don’t look so good sister, let me see if I can help with that”

The woman attempted to rise in a panic as he raises her temperature even further, crawling up to 106F. The general dizziness she was starting to feel makes her easy to push back down even without ghoulish strength, but Dew can’t help but smile wickedly at the handprint burned deep into her shoulder as she collapses back down in agony. It definitely was an unnecessary cruelness even for a pent up ghoul, but Dew had to admit it was a satisfying break to keep him entertained while he waited for her brain to essentially melt with the heat before setting her loose in the woods to stumble around leaving a trail for him to follow.

~~~

Aurora: hypothermia

Aurora's ability to literally dazzle was always a welcome addition for any night of release for the ghouls. While she would help distract with pretty currents of her namesake, leading prey in one direction or away from the other, it wasn’t particularly deadly.

At first the ghoulette would wait for her victims to get caught up in the swirling lights, then sink her sharp claws in, incapacitating them at the least. This did not do much to satiate that cruel predatory urge though, leading her to have to hunt more often. Luckily she eventually figured out something else.

The benefits of her particular elemental nature meant that she could quite easily drop the temperature around her, allowing a chilling wind to accompany those hypnotizing lights. Between that and a subtle manipulation of the ambient moisture in the air she could get them hypothermic with minimal effort.

There was almost a benefit to being Aurora’s target compared to one of the other ghouls. At least her prey died peaceful enough. There was a large euphoria that overtook all of their faces as they watched the beautiful display in their final moments.

Luckily for the other ghouls, Aurora’s small size made it so that she often had leftovers. The joy they felt before drawing in their last breaths seemed to sink into the blood and flesh creating a tasty treat.

~~~

Aether: forced hallucinations and isolation; memory manipulation; stealing of vitality (? I don’t know wtf to call it)

Aether loved a slow approach. He could play with a target for weeks if not months before he finally snapped and ended everything. Being known as a healer and somebody one could confide in had its perks.

On the shorter end of his spectrum was the more physical of his typical tricks. Organizing small accidents for his intended prey, sending them to the infirmary. Each time he would heal them, taking something a little extra for himself. Slowly over time his victims would lose their typical vigor and physically waste away.

There was only so long he could keep that act up before somebody started to get suspicious, hence the shorter time frame. It worked in a pinch when his malicious instincts kicked in a little too strong, but it was never ideal.

His favorite way to play with his food was very much a mental game compared to a physical one. Small amounts of hypnosis to take and replace vital memories. Generating imaginary fights and grievances with loved ones that slowly lead the target to isolation.

Once they had fully ostracized themselves from their peer groups was when he got to fully play around with his prey. The current sibling he had been working on had been a special project of his. He had been feeling up to a challenge and spent the last 6 weeks manipulating the formerly extremely popular sibling into making everyone else hate them. Well everyone but Aether that is. The ghoul made sure to make himself a loved confidant in the siblings mind. There for support going back way longer than the ghoul had even been topside.

He leads them down to the catacombs below the abbey, the sibling stumbling behind him in a hypnotic haze. Finally once they are in the center of the dense labyrinth he lets the quintessence induced haze fade from their mind, allowing clarity to take them over again.

“Oh Aether, where are we?” the sibling asks them like a scared child. The change from the cocky bastard they were before to this broken shell they have become sends a thrill up the ghoul’s spine.

“In the catacombs buddy, we better be careful though. I’ve heard there is a horrible monster that stalks around down here.” He fake soothes, hand on the siblings shoulder. With the point of contact he reaches into the siblings brain, magic quickly snaking down what are now well used paths. He implants a quick belief that there is a monster out to get the sibling then leans back against the wall giving them a head start as they bolt away in fear.

He would probably catch up a few times and dig around in their mind a little longer before releasing all the damage he has done, letting the sibling come to the realization of how little their mind had been there own over the past month and a half. Then the true monster chase could begin.

~~~

Aeon: infliction of disease/infection/necrosis; intense pain

Aeon never quite took to the mental manipulation that Aether adored so much. Instead he loved a more physical approach, sometimes even letting the mostly dormant earth element inside of him influence his kills.

Even new initiates knew about the healing properties of quintessence, but Aeon was a lot more partial to the opposite. Dulling pain and treating disease were such a powerful aspect of his element, but they were so boring sometimes.

He has been feeling that deep seated bloodlust all day. Right as he is about to give up and go bother another ghoul to hunt with him, a perfect opportunity limps in.

The sibling lights up that Aeon is still in the infirmary and finds their way to the examination table Aeon gestures them towards. The sibling is so caught up in the story of how they managed to fall out of a tree that they don’t even notice the way Aeon locks the door behind them.

He does his best impression of a serious medical professional as he checks them over asking about their injury, but his natural silly nature bleeds through, putting the sibling at ease as a light chuckle escapes their lips before they wince.

“Hmmm, it seems like you are in a lot of pain. Does it really hurt that bad?”

The sibling mutters something about how it could always be worse giving Aeon the perfect opportunity. “Yeah, I guess it could be worse”, he chuckles before letting a darkness settle over his face, “lets see what they looks like, huh?”

He let thin threads of quintessence flow into the sibling’s battered form and rocket towards their brain, turning all their pain receptors into overdrive. They almost fall off the table with the way their body suddenly contorts at the pain.

The effect slowly fades until there is no sensation left in the siblings legs at all. He can feel the siblings' panting and pained grunts wrap around that bloodthirsty need inside of him, beginning to soothe the urge already.

“You know, I saw a documentary about how dangerous infections were for humans the other day, while we are experimenting, why don’t you demonstrate that for me as well?” he hums, waving a hand over the cuts on the siblings arms and legs.

Much like a rapid timelapse the cuts and scrapes discolor as flesh swells and infection and rot take hold. He will have to throw away those sections, but watching the sibling attempt to crawl away is fascinating enough to make up for it.

~~~

Cirrus/Cumulus: breath manipulation; gravity manipulation (I guess?)

Often siblings see one or both of the air ghoulettes walk past and feel like their breath has been taken away. They always attribute the feeling to being a natural response to seeing such rare and radiant beauties such as them walk past, but there is more to it than that. It’s really more of an exercise of control for the two ghoulettes.

On this particular evening their little stunt seems to have attracted a pair of wandering admirers. The two girls set out the supplies for the picnic they had planned, and invite the young pair lurking at a distance to sit with them.

Cumulus entertains the guy with silly little magical party tricks while Cirrus lounges against a nearby tree watching the two with a warm smile. Eventually the woman asks to see Cumulus’ favorite trick with a lovestruck expression.

“Why of course I can show you that sugar” she responds with a sweet chuckle reminiscent of tinkling wind chimes. “Would you mind helping me out Cir’?”

The other ghoulette puts on her sweetest smile as she slinks over towards her mate and the siblings of sin. She notices the way the man takes in her every movement, lust starting to fill his eyes and holds back a laugh.

On the count of three the ghoulettes conjure up pillars of intense air, pressing down upon the siblings until they are stuck against the ground due to the force of the air around them. After a moment of watching the siblings squiggle uselessly against their magic the two dispel the effect with matching laughs.

The two humans look at each other with uncertainty, before they both decide it must be some ghoul joke that they don’t understand. The two begin to laugh nervously as the ghoulettes exchange a silent look.

“Now, my favorite trick is a bit different.” Cirrus continues, a dangerously smooth cadence overtaking her voice. All at once the ghoulettes make a beckoning motion, pulling all of the air out of the human's lungs. Once the panic completely overwhelms the sibling’s eyes and they seem on the edge of blacking out as they grasp at their throats uselessly the ghoulettes let the air return and then some. The relief of air turns to pained panic once again as the ghoulettes force the siblings lungs to hyperinflate.

“This is the part where you two run” Cumulus laughs, voiced laced with just as much venom as honey.

The two siblings take off in a dead sprint only to get shot up into the air as the ghoulettes do the opposite of their first ‘trick’. The pair end up half jumping, half stumbling in their run as the pressure around them changes continuously.

“What a lovely date night treat, and there's even one for each of us” Cirrus remarks with a loving smile at her mate before the two take off in pursuit of the two humans.

~~~

Mountain: Fungus; infection; loss of body control

Mountain might be known as a sweet and gentle ghoul, but he is very rough on his toys. Luckily for those around the abbey he has a strict ‘no sibling of sin’ rule, but it’s not from any high personal morals that he holds himself too. There are loads of trespassers deep in the woods for him to choose from and he thinks they are a lot more fun. Plus it helps maintain a cursed vibe to the forest that keeps the nearby humans from stomping around disrupting things as often.

Sure, he could always manipulate the nearby vegetation to ensnare his prey or manipulate the ground below them to swallow them whole, but those various tricks have always felt overdone and a bit too obvious in his opinion. No disrespect to the former earth band ghouls, as it was very much their scene but he has his own tricks up his sleeve.

So often people forget the effects of fungus. A simple scratch from a ‘rouge’ spore laden branch or vine and the fun can begin. The wanders through the woods think nothing of the tiny abrasions, letting the spores take root without a second thought as they continue to explore.

Mountain lets those spores propagate and spread slowly over hours. He lets his toy slowly fester as the network of hyphae slowly makes its way through their system. Only once it seems like the intruder is about to head out for the night does he finally act.

It begins with the network of fungus bursting out of the original wound, quickly pushing against flesh as it rapidly spreads and tries to find another way out. The hyphae push into the ground, traveling through the earth and reaching up to connect to Mountain nearby. If his prey were to look closely, which they never do, they would see the way the fungus feeds into his through his feet planted in the soil.

There are so many differences between people and rocks, but essentially they both are amalgamations of carbon and minerals. This particular skill had taken lots of trial and error, but watching Dew and then Rain use their element to puppet their kills had given him the idea. Now he can stop his toys in their tracks, trace earth inside of them, freezing them in place.

His favorite development of this realization was when he figured out he could slowly harden the flesh to something akin to petrified wood. Tonight though he only stops this particular intruder in their place and takes joy in watching the way thick roots replace the bundles of fungus as they push into the flesh, taking up residence where they don’t belong, nutrients quickly returning to the earth around him. Ghouls don’t really need to eat their prey, the elemental release and the thrill of pursuit were the real rewards. Mountain was more than happy to share his kills with the ravenous forest around him. Besides, one of the other ghouls would likely have leftovers if he was feeling peckish later.

#Unedited so if there are mistakes sorry bout that #I wanted to post this tomorrow but I need it gone so I'm posting it now and will likely just reblog it when I get to work in the afternoon #Should I throw this over on AO3? I might #I am expecting like 3 people to read this but oh well #nocturnal writings #murder ghouls #the band ghost fanfic #violence tw #death tw

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