#i work at a daycare and one of the families also likes hockey

[i-willstealyourtoes]

Huh can I get uhhhh

Get uhh

Bain legally adopts a teenage reader for tax reasons and drops them off at the safehouse and Dallas essentially becomes their dad?

Also a side of them hanging out with the younger heisters (Joy Sydney Sokol) and I guess I'll be having it platonic family fluff style. Sorry if this is the wrong place to ask though.

You got it right! Hope you enjoy :) I decided not to use the colours, because I'm not sure if people actually like them haha- If you guys want them back lmk!

Adopted!Teen!Reader + the PDG

- Now, Bain did adopt you for tax reasons (I don't know how that works but we roll)

- But that doesn't mean he doesn't care about you or anything, he'll make sure you're alright

- But he's not exactly in the position to look after a kid, considering he's always busy and needs to be as private as possible

- So he usually leaves you at the safehouse, where there's always someone there

- Dallas interacts with you first, as well as some of the younger heisters

- He's always been the one to greet new members of the team, as he is kind of the leader

- So it isn't much different with you, although of course you're much younger than the people he's interacted with recently

- Forgive him if he's a little awkward

- With the younger heisters, at least he could talk about their occupation and skills, but with you? Nothing

- But he's friendly enough, letting you know he's there if you have any problems

- Every heister has a different first opinion of you

- For example, Joy and Sydney are quite nice to you immediantly

- They're closest to you in age, and therefore a bit more relatable

- Sydney will get you to do some pranks or something

- Joy will record it, occasionally helping out

- They're definitely one of the quickest to warm up to you

- If you like art or gaming, they're more than happy to talk about it with you!

- You can all play Mario Kart or something :)

- Joy will beat you guys for sure, but it's okay (you and Sydney will get her back later)

- I think at the start, Sokol would be kind of dismissive of you

- I mean, why do they have to deal with Bain's kid? The safe-house is a place for skilled heisters to plan out their next move, not some daycare

- Or at least, that's how it starts for him

- But when you ask for some pointers on how to shoot, play hockey, or maybe ask for some lessons in Russian, he'll start to warm up

- After that? He treats you like his beloved little sibling :)

- 'If anything happens to them I will kill everyone in this room and then myself' type beat

- May occasionally try to get you into the heisting career at some point. Maybe.

- Once you learn how to shoot and so on, Dallas might help you out too, but he probably won't let you do anything further

- You're still a kid, he doesn't like the idea of putting you in danger

- Although the younger heisters seem to think it as a potentially good idea

- As for the other heisters?

- Wolf would probably not talk to you in general, but the more time you spend in his presence, the more discreetly protective of you he is

- Chains is probably more like a mix of Dallas and Sokol in that he'd like having you train, but is unsure about you starting off a career in heisting

- Hoxton is originally a bit stand-offish for the same reason as Sokol, but eventually matches a bit with Sydney in that he'd encourage you to bring a little chaos in the safe-house

- Houston would be like Wolf; he wouldn't really speak to you or interact since he thinks it's weird for Bain to adopt you in the first place. Will encourage some pranks though-

- John Wick would also be in disagreement with you being adopted by Bain in the first place, but will warm up and help with training (he's definitely quite strict tho beware!!)

- Clover for sure acts as an older sister, teasing you but overall being kind and protective over you (will cheer you on during training)

- Dragan would try not interact with you really..but he might give some tips if you're training/working out. Eventually, like Wolf, he will become secretly protective of you :)

- Jacket would probably not interact very often with you, but eventually, he'll let you listen to his music or play games (kinda like Houston, he will low-key enjoy the pranks too)

- Bonnie would treat you like a little sibling and maybe try to teach you poker to scam the others with false innocence (high-fives if you do so) + if you have (romantic) relationship issues, she will encourage you to end/ruin their lives

- Jiro would definitely judge Bain for adopting you for tax reasons, and for a little bit he might be a quite distant, but as time progress, he sort of views you as a kid to look after too, maybe not like his child, but still a child for him to protect and look after

- Bodhi would for sure try get you into surfing or just sports, the others will pull you away (unless you actually enjoy it then they'll just roll their eyes or something)

- Jimmy is maybe not the greatest role model, but he's actually quite fun around you, just be aware he might pass out in the middle of a conversation with you

- Rust would probably keep his distance from you at first, thinking that it's better not to interact since he's, well, old and a criminal. But after a little while, especially once you start training and so on, he'll warm up to you! You might find yourself a new (o l d) uncle :)

- Sangres for sure will try to teach you some blade skills or Spanish words (a lot of them might be profanity). He's a lot of fun, just not the most responsible-

- Duke might not come up to talk to you much, but he doesn't mind talking to you if you come up to him, especially if it's about history and so on :)

[asirensrage]

Oh hey 👋 I'm really interested in your Naruto; MHA and Tokyo revengers ocs. What can you tell me about them?

Hiiii! Oh man, okay...

Let's start with the Naruto OC:

Kei's fic is titled "the weight of all my sins". Kei is in her twenties and her pairing is with Kakashi. The two of them are friends who are clearly more but both refuse to admit it. Kei is (or was ) in ANBU and wears a mask like Kakashi's to hide her scars and help conceal her expressions. When she was a genin, her team was attacked by a rogue nin who basically tricked her sensei's animal partner into attacking her and her teammates. She believes she accidentally gave her sensei's position away allowing the enemy to kill him. Her relationship with Kakashi develops as she comes to terms with the things she's done and allowing him in. It's supposed to be a fic that looks into what it means to be a ninja and looks at grief, loss, sacrifice, murder, protection, acceptance and letting people in. I've posted snippets of it which can be found here, but no full fic. There's also her moodboard which can be found here. Her tag on my blog is "oc: kei".

MHA OC:

This is my girl Sayuri. Her fic is titled Dig My Grave (take my hand). It's a Dabi x oc fic. This is a darker fic that looks at childhood trauma, obsession and what you'll sacrifice of yourself to survive. Sayuri has a strength quirk and has been hiding it in an effort to live her life quietly and ensure no one from her past finds her again. Unfortunately, she uses her strength to save some children from a villain at the daycare she works at...and it was televised not long after Stain's ideology goes viral. Now she's faced with her past coming back to bite her, the League of Villains demanding her compliance to join, and the heroes trying to keep an eye on her. She's definitely angry and believes that the only good enemy is a dead on. There's a better explanation here lol. Her moodboard can be found here and her playlist can be found here. Her tag on my blog is "oc: sayuri".

finally, Tokyo Revengers oc!

This is my latest oc Takara. She's an isekai character, waking up one day to find herself in a new body, with a new family and the memories of a life she's never lived. Needless to say, it's a bit alarming but what's more alarming to her is the fact that she's not as scared as she should be. It becomes worse when her memories of her actual life start to fade. She's a little violent, can be manipulative, has a mouth like a sailor and is the epitome of "call an ambulance, but not for me!" Mainly because she's about 5'2" with an attitude that comes from having older brothers and playing multiple sports including hockey. She prefers to be on rollerblades because it makes her fast, is a bit antisocial and unafraid to fight even if she's not trained lol. She also tends to speak without thinking which is shown multiple times including when her first words to Hanma are: "What the fuck? Did your mother fuck a giant? Why the fuck are you so tall?”

The only person who seems to be aware that she doesn't belong is her "new" brother, Takemichi. When he reveals that he can time travel, she makes the choice to help him. Her attachment to her new brother grows, and while her future (and pairing) changes with every change he makes, she becomes determined to make sure that he survives to see the future. No matter what that costs her.

I'll share her moodboard in a proper intro post and I'll tag it here when I post it lol. Her tag on my blog is "oc: takara" and there are small snippets posted in answers to asks. Her playlist though is here.

Thanks for asking!

[typical-simplelove]

Since We Were Three (J. Oleksiak)

Summary: What happens when you go work for the Dallas Stars and your childhood enemy plays for them, too?

A/n: Here is a fun enemies to lovers I wrote. This is the first time I've ever written for that trope, but I want to write more so buckle up! Enjoy this!!

Warnings: people doing things enemies do (sorry, that's really vague), mentions of sex, breaking/spraining ankles

Word Count: 12.1k

You didn’t expect to move to Dallas; it wasn’t even on your radar. All you really remember is sitting at your parents' house back home and you got an email from your Linkedin saying that there was a position open for something you were qualified for. You didn’t even bother to look at where it was; you opened the application, read the prerequisites, and filled it out. You were desperate to get a job, so it didn’t matter. Only after you emailed your application did you realize where it was - Dallas. It didn’t even register in your mind at the time that your former neighbor and lifelong enemy lives in Dallas or plays for the Dallas Stars, the organization you just sent an application for. They were looking for someone to work in their marketing department. If you knew that your former neighbor and lifetime enemy was working for the Dallas Stars, then you’d probably not have submitted the application. You decided, however, that the pros greatly outweighed the cons, and you doubted that you’d ever need to interact with the players unless they had a marketing issue. You doubt they would, right?

You got an email three days later asking for an interview. You emailed them back saying that you lived in Canada and weren’t sure if you could make it down for an interview. Thankfully, they said that they’d be willing to have a virtual interview; however, you’d have to be willing to move to Dallas for the job. You knew for a fact that you’d be more than willing to move to Dallas. That wasn’t the problem. So, you and the Dallas Stars’ representative set a time for your virtual meeting. You had the interview, and it seemed like they liked you. You got an email three days later that you got the job; you moved to Dallas three days after that and started four days later.

You completely forgot about the fact that your enemy slash former neighbor was in Dallas until your mother brought it up.

“Hey, yn, you know, you don’t not know anyone in Dallas.” You were confused. You literally moved to a country in which you knew no one.

“Mom, I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Jamie, remember him? Jamie Oleksiak. You hated him growing up. Well, remember, he plays for the Dallas Stars. You should contact him.”

The normal warmth in your face immediately drained. Yeah, now you remember. The only reason you had the slightest inkling as to what Jamie was up to was because your mother and his mother were good friends. You don’t care for him at all.

You knew that you couldn’t just outright and tell your mother “no”, so you pivoted. “Maybe,” you said and your mother seemed to think that meant that you’d be reaching out to Jamie. You weren’t. You were going to do everything in your power to try to avoid him. There was no way that someone who worked in marketing would ever come in contact with any of the players, right? You didn’t work in media that was in constant contact with the team, and you didn’t work in anything to do with the contracts or paychecks. As long as you keep a quiet profile, you expect you should be fine, right?

This worked for your first season working with Stars. You were new and a few years out of college, so your more experienced colleagues made sure to observe what you were doing. You were happy with this. Before working in Dallas, you only worked for one small company and you were one of two people in the marketing department. The reason you were looking for a new job was that this company went bankrupt. Yeah, you were grateful for the oversight you received. You made it one year without seeing, hearing, talking to, or being around Jamie. The fact that the two of you were in the same city made your blood boil. You hated Jamie Oleksiak with your entire being, and you hoped to avoid him as much as possible.

You went into the second season thinking that you’d have the ability to remain anonymous to the team and stay in your lane. This, unfortunately, did not work. You went to work on the morning that training camp started. You sat at your desk and noticed that everyone was quite angsty. You turned to a friend and asked what was going on. She told you that someone from management was coming to find people to work for the GM, specifically, someone in marketing. You knew that you’d be the last one selected considering your lack of experience. You were wrong.

The minute the representative from the GM’s offices walked in and saw your application, you were swept up and taken to their offices. Happy with the new promotion, you didn’t realize that you’d be closer to Jamie.

The notion hit you nine days after you were promoted when Tyler Seguin walked into the office and walked over to you.

“Yn, right?” he says and you nod. “We need someone to fill in with media personnel and they asked for you.”

“Oh!” you say; you had experience in media but not that much to get a recommendation.

“Yeah, they said to be there at 1:30pm.”

“Thanks,” you tell Tyler; he smiles at you and waves.

So you were going to be getting closer to the team than you thought.

. . .

As you walked down the hall towards the locker room, you ran right into the wall. Except it wasn’t a wall.

“Oh, you’re not a wall,” you say mostly to yourself. It was a very hard and firm person.

“So, you’re telling me you would have walked into me also if I were a wall?” You look up and see none other than Jamie Oleksiak looking back at you.

His beautiful eyes made you want to throw up. There was no word to express how much you hated him. Literally just staring at him for a second made you want to run away and scream.

“I, no, I just thought I had more time before I had to turn the corner.”

“Sure,” he says in a voice that makes you want to punch him; however, looking at him, you know it wouldn’t hurt at all and do the damage you wanted. Since when did he get so big? “Hey, Yn. I heard you started working for the Stars organization. Welcome to Dallas.”

“Yeah, no, you’re not my welcome party. And I’ve been in Dallas for almost a year.” You immediately back up but trip over your feet. Jamie instantly reaches out and helps you balance. You feel your face suddenly grow warm. Why did Jamie’s enormously large hands have this effect on you?

“You always were quite clumsy growing up. Tripping and falling for me, I mean in front of me.” Jamie’s joke didn’t go past you. It infuriated you. He liked to think that you were in love with him. You weren’t.

“You know, the only reason I kept on falling was because you kept tripping me. It’s your fault.” You storm away angrily and head to where you need to be.

Jamie smiles after you. “That’s the feistiness that I remember.”

You turn around and glare at him. Yeah, this wasn’t going to be fun.

. . .

You’ve hated Jamie Oleksiak since he tripped you in daycare when you were three years old. The first three years of your life, you didn’t mind Jamie. Your mothers were best friends, and you were both neighbors. Your parents were both ER surgeons and sometimes they had to go in for emergency surgery. This was one of those days. Your father was already working and your mother was called in for emergency surgery, so Jamie’s mother was going to pick you up from preschool. You put on your small, sparkly light purple backpack and followed Jamie and his mother out the door. The minute you were about to cross the parking lot, Jamie stuck his foot out and you tripped and fell on your face. You didn’t immediately feel the pain until Jamie’s mother helped you up and mentioned that your face was bleeding. You touched your face and began to cry. Jamie tripped you purposefully and now your face was bleeding. From that day forward, you hated Jamie Oleksiak with your entire being. How could someone who was supposed to be your friend and care for you purposefully hurt you? Where was the logic in that? Why could Jamie purposefully hurt you unless he didn’t like you? He must hate you to want to hurt you.

It wasn’t just because he tripped you; Jamie began to make your life miserable. From taunting you on the playground to tripping you all the time. It continued into kindergarten and elementary school. Middle school was terrible. He taunted you and made fun of you. He always found ways to make anything you were enthusiastic about a reason to taunt you. He joined clubs because you were in them and so he could bring his stupid with him who would the experience unenjoyable for you. You remember your parents telling you to ignore him and Jamie probably had a crush on you. He didn’t. He just out of nowhere opted to make your life miserable.

It only got worse in high school. As his popularity grew in high school as a result of hockey, he only became more cocky and unbearable. He always found a way to make you miserable. Whenever you had any remote crush or boyfriend, Jamie always swept in and ruined it for you. By the time you graduated and went to college, you were ready to leave the horrors that Jamie brought on to you. You were quite proud of the fact that despite your mothers being friends, you had no idea about anything to do with Jamie’s life. You went to college and built a life that was the exact opposite of the misery that Jamie brought into your life.

. . .

You walk into the locker room and Carrie, one of the other media execs, greets you. “Yn, right?”

You nod. “Yeah, that’s me.”

“We need you to fill in for a few weeks with our media team because one of the media personnel had to leave for a family emergency. Is that okay?”

“Yeah, I mean, I’m not sure how good I’ll be at it, but I’m willing to give it a shot.”

Carrie laughs. “It’s not too hard. You just have to take photos and videos of the team during warmups, practices, and stuff like that. If you know how to use Instagram, then you should be great.”

“Well, then, I think I should be good.”

“We’re going to give you a separate phone to use that you can just keep at your desk in the GM’s offices.”

“Perfect, that sounds great.” You and Carrie continue to talk and work out the little details about your new temporary position. You walked back to your desk in the GM’s offices with a smile on your face. You were happy to have this new position. At first, I didn’t recall to you that you’d have to be in contact with the team. When you heard Jamie’s voice echoing through the halls, your blood began to boil. You definitely weren’t looking forward to having to have to work with him.

. . .

The day after you got the word that you were filling in with the Media Department, you started right away. You were told to sit in the practice arena ready to take photos and videos of the team. As the practice was ending, Carrie asked you to head to the locker room and take one-minute interviews with the players. She gave you the list of players: Tyler Seguin, John Klingberg, Esa Lindell, Roope Hintz, and, much to your disappointment, Jamie Oleksiak. You sighed. You really didn’t want to have to talk to him, but you were going to be professional and try not to let him get to you.

You walk towards the locker room and Carrie tells you to wait a moment; the players aren’t ready. After fifteen minutes of small talk, you and Carrie walk into the locker room. The players that you and Carrie were going to interview were sitting on the bench waiting. You glance around the room and Jamie is looking at you with a curious eye.

“This is yn; she’s filling in for a few weeks as media personnel whilst Tristain is out with a family emergency,” Carrie explains. “Be nice to her please.”

Jamie meets your eye again and smirks. You roll your eyes and some of the players notice with confusion.

“Yn, why don’t you start with Tyler and I’ll start with John and we’ll work our way around?” Carrie explains.

You nod. You glance around the room and take note of who you’d be interviewing. You were going to be interviewing Jamie Oleksiak much to your disappointment. You get through the interview with Tyler, but he stops you before you can move on.

“What’s with you and Big Rig?” Tyler asks.

You smile at him trying to hide your disdain for your former friend. “Nothing, I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”

Tyler laughs. “If you say so.”

You move on and interview Roope next. His interview made you giggle like a maniac behind the camera, and you didn’t notice the glares that Jamie gave his teammate and you.

You finish your interview with Roope and get ready to interview Jamie.

“Hi Jamie, ready for your interview?” you ask professionally.

“Yeah, I am,” he says in a tone that you can’t quite decipher but it’s already got your blood boiling. This wasn’t going to be fun.

“So, Jamie, tell me, what’s been the best part of the start of the new season?”

He puts a smirk on his face and you know exactly what he’s thinking - you’re not going to get an answer you like. “Uh, I’ve liked that I’ve been able to rekindle our companionship.”

You roll your eyes. “That’s not what this is, and you have to give me a different answer.”

Jamie’s answer didn’t go unnoticed by his teammates and they were begging, no yearning, to ask more.

“Fine,” Jamie pauses briefly to think of another question. “I would say just being back with the team and skating with everyone again is probably the best part about the start of the new season.”

You nod and glance down at your list of questions. “What do you hope to get out of this new season?”

“Hopefully a Stanley Cup?” he says and quirks his eyebrows in a way that sends warmth to your face but also infuriates you. You nod in a sign of acknowledgment and Jamie can’t pass up the opportunity to get a rise out of you. “Maybe you, too.”

You instantly drop your notepad and glare up at him. What was his problem? Why was he like this? Jamie should know you hate him, so why does he suddenly think that you two were going to fix the hatred that’s been building for years? Your reaction doesn’t go unnoticed by everyone in the room. “Can you please stop? Just so you know, I hate you, so whatever fantasy you’re playing out in your mind? It’s not happening, Jamie. Can you please stop making it harder for me to do my job?”

Jamie smirks. He knows he should stop, but he won’t. “I always liked watching you get frustrated at me.”

“Jamie! Just cut it out!”

“Is everything okay over here?” Carrie says, trying to calm the situation.

“Yeah, we’re fine. Jamie’s just rehashing things from our childhoods.” You explain.

“Wait, you two know each other?” John asks comically.

Jamie nods. “Know is not quite it, but yes.”

“What does that mean?” John asks

“That means that Yn hates me.”

“You hate me too, Jamie; don’t just put this on me. You’ve only ever made my life more difficult throughout every part of it.”

“Yn, why don’t you interview Esa, and I’ll finish with Jamie, that good?” Carrie suggests

“Yes, that works,” you walk over to Esa and breathe out a sigh of relief. Yeah, you knew that this was exactly what was going to happen.

You finished your interview with Esa, and you and Carrie walked out of the locker room to prep the videos to be posted.

“Dude, what did you do to make her so angry at you?” Esa asks. “It seems like your mere presence pisses her off.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure it does,” Jamie admits. “I can’t remember why; all I remember is that one day we started hating each other.”

“I’d hate to be in your shoes,” Tyler tells his teammate. “A pretty girl hates you, and you very obviously like her.”

Jamie pales. He didn’t think it was that obvious to anyone, ever. “What?”

Everyone laughs.

“It’s obvious,” Roope agrees. “You like her. Just the way you looked at her and acted around her. You’ve got it bad.”

“No, I don’t,” Jamie grumbles.

“Dude, you were staring at her the entire time she was interviewing Roope. All the giggling made you jealous, didn’t it?” Esa states.

“I’m not jealous, and I don’t care. There is nothing but hate between us.” Jamie tries to defend himself. It’s useless; Jamie knows for a fact that he was jealous that Roope got to be on the receiving end of your giggles.

“Whatever, this is going to be fun,” John says.

It truly will be.

. . .

When you got home from work that day, you immediately called your best friend, Lisa, to tell her all about your day with Jamie.

“You know?” you being. “He’s just as infuriating as when we were children. He had the audacity to believe that we could possibly be friends. I mean, come on, the antipathy and rancor between us can be felt for miles and miles. He drives me crazy so much.”

Lisa was glad that you weren’t doing a video call because the smile on her face was wide. Deep down, she knows that there are other feelings besides this hate between you and Jamie; she just wasn’t sure if it would ever come out. “Maybe he wants to be nice again.”

“No, that’s not what this is. If he wanted to be nice and try to be friends again, then he wouldn’t have done exactly what he knew would drive me insane. It’s probably like caffeine to him; driving me insane is the coffee that wakes him up in the morning. You know, now, probably, he wakes up and hatches a plan to try to drive me insane.”

Lisa laughs. “Aren’t you taking this a bit far?”

“Absolutely not, I think I’m acting appropriately. You didn’t see his smirk; I wanted to punch him in the face so badly. Obviously, it wouldn’t have done anything to hurt him as he’s huge now.”

“Oh? Down there too?”

Your face warms suddenly, and you’re glad Lisa can’t see your face. “That’s not what I meant. He’s giant and super muscular. I guess you could assume that he’s packing quite a bit.”

“You know, yn, maybe this is just pent-up sexual tension and frustration. Maybe you just need to get laid and get laid by someone in particular.”

“You’re telling me that when we were seven when Jamie broke my ankle, that was pent-up sexual frustration?”

Lisa laughs. “Okay, maybe not your entire relationship was pent-up sexual tension. Maybe just now and parts of high school? You have to admit, Jamie is quite hot, now, right? Maybe the past few years of hate has led to the dire need to just sleep with each other.”

“Thank you for your take, but these past few days is the first time I’ve spoken to Jamie in almost five years. I just don’t know what to do.”

“Just talk to him. Maybe tell him that you want this to be as professional as possible and try to move past the hate. Yn, before you argue, just think of what working for the Dallas Stars could do to your career. That’s a high-profile job. Maybe if you try to be professional and polite, then maybe he will too?”

You wanted to contradict everything Lisa said, but you knew she was right. For your job to go smoothly, it was important for you to keep a professional attitude and any hate you have for Jamie on the backburner. “You’re right; however, I’m not promising that it’s going to work. I’ll try my best to be professional, but if he starts to aggravate me, I’m not sure if I can keep up that facade.”

“That’s why you talk to him. Maybe set up a time to meet up or something and just discuss what you have to say.”

“That would require me to unblock him on literally everything, even Facebook.”

“Does he still even have that?”

“He does; it’s not even his real name. It’s an alias. He only made it to try to talk to me and bother me. I doubt he uses it and it may be deactivated now.”

“This is besides the point. Yn, Jamie is obviously not going to try to be professional with you, so it’s up to you to make that clear.”

“Yeah, you’re right.”

The only lingering thought you had was whether or not this would work. Surely, Jamie could be a decent human being to you, right?

. . .

The next day, you went and sat in the practice arena ready to take the photos that your job required you to take. Today, you decided was going to be the day that you had that all too important conversation with Jamie. You really didn’t want to have that conversation, but you knew that it was important in having a not chaotic working environment for everyone, not just you and Jamie.

When practice was over, you waited outside the locker room for Jamie. He walked out on his own and smirked when he saw you waiting. He didn’t know for sure you were waiting for him; however, when he saw that your phone was off, he assumed you weren’t there for work.

“Hey, ynn,” Jamie says to you and your blood instantly begins to boil. Jamie knew that you never gave him the jurisdiction to call you that, yet he still used it. You wanted to call him out on it but thought better of it. You were here to try to be professional and rehashing this would contradict your objective.

“Hey, Jamie, can we talk? It’s about something important.”

Jamie’s smirk instantly left his face and worry washed over his face. You didn’t know that Jamie could be sympathetic towards anything you said. “Yeah, is everything okay?”

His response shocked you and it took you a moment to regroup. “Oh, yeah. I just want to talk about our relationship, well, lack thereof of one. I think that when we’re here at work, we should be professional. We should put any hate that we have for each other on the side while here so that we can have a better working environment.”

Jamie laughs. “This is what you wanted to talk about? This couldn’t have been a text? You had me so worried, yn.”

“It’s important to me, Jamie,” you protest. You didn’t want to get angry at him, so you calmed yourself down. “I think it’s better for both of us if we can just keep our history and past behind us while we are doing anything to do with the Dallas Stars.”

“If I were to take you out on a date, then we could hate each other as normal?”

“What?” you falter.

“You heard me, yn. You never had a hard time hearing what I had to say.”

“No, absolutely not. You will not be taking me out on a date, ever.”

“Come on, really?”

“Jamie, this is beside the point. I’m trying to move on from our pasts and you aren’t really making this any easier. Isn’t this what you said the other day? You were hoping for a rekindling? Well, this is the first part. Trying to put behind us any hate.” You were raising your voice now. “I’m trying to make my job easier, but you’re making it incredibly difficult. Jamie, all I want is to come to work and not have to worry about whether or not an outburst I make at you will cost me my job.”

Jamie doesn’t have anything to say. “Yn.”

“No, don’t do that. You know, the reason we hate each other is your fault, so you should be the one fixing things, not me.”

“What?”

“You tripped me purposefully when we were three and laughed at me.”

“Wait, this is what this is about?”

“No, that’s the first time you treated me terribly. It was the start of you belittling me and making me feel terrible. I hated going to school because I was always worried about you and your stupid antics.” Tears are forming at the corners of your eyes, and you try to will them away.

Jamie feels terrible now. “I’m sorry, ynn. I didn’t know.”

“Firstly, don’t call me ynn; you don’t get to do that. Secondly, seriously? You’re telling me that you didn’t know you were being a total ass to me? No, I don’t believe that because I know for a fact that your mother talked to you. Do you want to know how I know that? Because she apologized to me time and time again for what you did to me. Don’t you dare say that you had no idea.”

Jamie looks down at you and extends his left leg so it’s jutting out. “You’re right. I was a total ass.”

“Only took you twenty-plus years to finally admit that.”

“Come on, ynn,” Jamie says and you glare at him. “Yn, I’m trying here, and you’re not making it any easier.”

“Oh my goodness, Jamie. Literally, that’s what I’ve been trying to do! You not willing to accept my proposition is the whole reason we’re rehashing this stuff.”

“Yn, I’m sorry. What can I do?”

You look at him and are shocked to see that he has remorse in his eyes. “Nothing, just let me be.” You take a step to the right and begin to walk away. Unfortunately, because Jamie extended his leg, you tripped over it and went crashing to the floor hurting your ankle in the process. You screamed out in pain; you always had weak ankles after breaking them in elementary school. Your cry out in pain brought some people out of the locker room.

Jamie’s eyes go wide in fear. “Yn! Are you okay?”

“Does it look like I’m okay? Jamie, did you really have to trip me?”

“Really? I didn’t mean to! My leg was just there, and you tripped.”

“It doesn’t matter; let me just get up.” You put your hands flat on the ground to help yourself up. The minute your leg is stable enough to be stood up on, you get up but fall immediately. You cry out in pain again.

“You might have sprained your ankle,” Roope says. He was one of the people who rushed out of the locker room when you first fell.

“No, I don’t think so. I just have very weak ankles after Jamie broke, I mean, I broke my ankles in elementary school.” Your correction of Jamie breaking your ankles does not go unnoticed by him. He wants to ask why but feels it’s not the right moment.

“Here, let me help you,” Jamie reaches for your arms and you move them away. “Really, yn? Just let me help you.”

Jamie and Roope help you up and put you on the bench in the locker room, and Roope goes to find a trainer to check on your ankle.

“I’m sorry, yn, really,” Jamie says with a soft voice. You begin to put your foot on the ground but Jamie stops you gently. “Put it on the bench. It’s important to keep it elevated.”

“It’s cold, though,” you pout.

Jamie laughs. “Here, put it on my lap then, okay?”

You look at Jamie hesitantly.

“This isn’t a trick, yn. I think I’ve hurt you enough over the years. Just put your leg on my lap.”

You do as he says and Jamie rests his hands on top of your ankle. Your face grows warm at the touch and you suddenly don’t hate Jamie. “So, you’re finally admitting that you made me miserable?”

“I don’t think I made you miserable,” Jamie says and you scoff. “Wait, let me finish. I think I didn’t make your life any easier. I’m not relenting any more than that, babe.”

You flinch at the pet name, but your face grows warm. Do you address it?

Jamie makes the decision for you. “Yn, I have a question for you.”

You nod, signaling him to continue.

“You were saying something about how you have weak ankles and then said something about me. This isn’t me trying to be self-centered or whatever. I just genuinely want to know. I don’t remember what happened.”

“Well, we were in elementary school and you once, I’m pretty sure it was accidental, put your hand out and it hit me while I was walking down the stairs and I fell. I landed weirdly on my ankle and broke it.”

“So you blame me?”

“Yes, absolutely. Do you blame me? You had a way of hurting me and making it seem like an accident.”

Jamie laughs and you giggle along; he’s about to comment when a trainer walks in.

“Let’s see what’s the matter here,” he says. You are suddenly extremely aware that your leg is sitting on Jamie’s lap and his hands are on your lap. The trainer examines your ankle. “It’s nothing too terrible; just a small sprain. I think if you keep it elevated as much as possible then it should be healed in a few days. Can you try walking on it?”

You nod and put your foot on the ground gently. Jamie puts his hands on your waist as you try to stand, and your skin is burning beneath his touch. “I think I’m good to get back to work.”

“You sure?” Jamie asks, concerned.

You nod. “Yeah, I think so,” you walk away from Jamie’s embrace. “Yeah, I’m good.”

“Just ice it and keep it elevated once you get home tonight,” the trainer tells you. You nod and walk out of the locker room.

“What did you do to her?” Roope asks Jamie.

“Too much damage to ever fix,” Jamie says with a sigh. There was no way that your relationship with Jamie would ever go past professional acquaintances after what you revealed to him today. If Jamie knew one thing about you it was that you were strong and steadfast with your opinions and rarely changed them, especially when it came to people. Jamie doubted that he’d be an exception considering all of the past history there.

. . .

The days that followed your fall, you avoided Jamie as much as possible. You could proudly say that you didn’t hate him anymore. That’s not true. You still hated Jamie; however, when you heard his name, you didn’t immediately roll your eyes and get angry. Sometimes, you’d smile and other times you’d have no reaction. This shocked everyone because they all knew about the hatred you had for the Dallas Stars hockey player.

Shortly after, you were taken off of the media job and went back to your marketing job. The night of the home opener, however, Carrie comes up to your office with a request. “Tristain can be back at work but not for games at the moment. Do you think that you could fill in tonight? We had her on the schedule and no one else can be there.”

You hesitate; the only thing holding you back was the fact that you’d be seeing Jamie again.

“Sure, of course!”

You sort out the details with Carrie and are set to be available as part of the media team tonight for the home opener.

Later that day, you’re standing outside of the locker room filming the boys get ready for warmups. Once the video was taken and posted, you put the phone in your pocket and begin to head to the place you were supposed to be. However, someone grabs onto your arm gently and stops you.

“How’s your ankle?” Jamie asks softly.

This should infuriate you; however, his concern has you touched. You don’t show it though. “Better. I think I’d be better, though, if I didn’t have to worry about my ankles but oh well.”

Jamie shakes his head; he wasn’t sure why he was expecting anything else from you.

“I have to go, good luck tonight, Jamie,” you tell him and walk away. You’ll admit, your comment was quite snarky and unneeded. You feel bad for what you said, and Jamie was only trying to be nice. You had to keep up familiarities, right? You hated Jamie Oleksiak for the majority of your life, so why did you suddenly feel bad for what you said to him?

. . .

“Are you coming out with us tonight, Yn?” Denis asks. The team won and wanted to go out and celebrate.

You shake your head. “No, thanks for the invite though.”

“Oh, come on, why not, Ynn?” Jamie asks. Why was he asking you that? Did he not remember that the two of you have hated each other since birth? “Don’t not go because of me.”

“Funny. You think that I care about what you do or think. I just have a few things I have to do.” you lied; you weren’t going to admit that Jamie was the reason you weren’t going out.

Jamie smirks. “Fine, if you say so, but I will continue to think in my head that the reason you’re not coming out with us is because of me and the animosity we have for each other.”

“Well, look at you. Did you finally begin to remember the vocabulary we learned in high school?”

Jamie’s face turns red. Yes, he asked his sister to send photos of his old stuff from high school to try to impress you. He wasn’t going to admit it, however. Ever since that heart to heart in the locker room, Jamie wanted nothing more than to impress you. You went back to bantering and driving each other crazy; however, this was a lighter teasing and driving each other crazy. Some would even call it flirting. Would Jamie say he was flirting with you? Yes, absolutely. Would Jamie say you were flirting back with him? No, absolutely not. You hated him, so Jamie knew that whatever he thought you felt was obviously in his head.

“No,” he grumbles and some of his teammates laugh at him. The one thing that was sticking out to Jamie was that you didn’t correct him when he called you by your nickname. You went along with it. Was there some progress being made? “Enjoy whatever you have to do tonight, yn.”

You smile at him softly that has Jamie’s heart beating fast and walk away.

“Dude, you’re in deep with her,” someone says as they clap Jamie on the back. He didn’t have the energy to determine who was talking to him or contradict what they were saying. They were right; Jamie was in deep and he had no idea what to do about it.

After taking the video you needed for the Stars Instagram of the boys playing soccer at the next home game, you wave goodbye and head to the media offices; you once again had to fill in for the media team. You take five steps and hear a loud “ow!” from the one voice you despised. You turn around to see Jamie rubbing his head and staring down at his teammates. You can’t help but smile.

“Stop staring at her, you idiot,” Roope calls out and this gets a laugh out of all the boys. “Just ask her out instead of staring,” someone else yells. A deep red blush overtakes Jamie’s face and you can’t help but smile. You walk away with a giant smile on your face. You immediately shake it off. Why was Jamie getting flustered making you smile? You hated Oleksiak, right?

. . .

When you got home from work after a long day, all you wanted to do was curl up in a ball and sleep. You had a minor sinus infection and the day was exhausting. You had a massive headache and felt nauseous all day. There was nothing more you wanted to do was take a hot shower, curl up in warm clothing, and call it a night. You weren’t expecting to come home and see a DoorDash bag sitting outside your door. You knew for a fact that you didn’t order anything. You picked up the bag and noticed there was a note attached.

Yn,

I heard that you were feeling sick, so I bought you some soup.

Enjoy,

Jamie

Jamie bought you soup? Jamie was asking about you? Where did this come from? Why would Jamie extend any kindness towards you? Isn’t he supposed to hate you? Isn’t Jamie supposed to be making your life miserable? You’ll admit, after the incident where you sprained your ankle slightly, you and Jamie have been cordial. Whenever you both talked to each other, mean words were being passed around. However, it was more of a teasing and flirting meanness. Does this mean that you and Jamie were friends now? No, right?

You walk into your apartment and open the bag - it was Italian Wedding Soup, your favorite. Your heart warmed at the fact that Jamie remembered your favorite soup. Growing up, your grandmother always made this for you when you were sick. Sometimes, she’d bring some over to the Oleksiak house if anyone was sick there, too. You grabbed a bowl and ladle and put some soup in a bowl. The minute you took the first bite, you sighed in content. It wasn’t quite like home, but it was close. You started to immediately feel better. How did Jamie know this was exactly what you needed? You wanted to text him to thank him; however, you didn’t have his phone number and didn’t feel comfortable sending him a text through Instagram quite yet. You opted to write him and note and were going to leave it in his stall the next morning.

You finished the soup and began to feel better. You were happy and thankful for the soup, but you had one lingering thought. Why would Jamie do something like this for you?

The next morning, when Jamie got to his stall, he noticed that there was a gift bag sitting on the bench. He looked around to see if maybe one of his teammates left it there. It wasn't his birthday and there was no big milestone coming up. What was the message behind it, then?

“It was here when I got here,” John tells Jamie.

“He wanted to open it, but we told him that it wouldn’t be nice,” Roope says.

“I didn’t want to open it; I wanted to see who it was from. There’s a difference.”

“Whatever, Jamie, just open it.”

Jamie grabs the bag and looks for a card or maybe a note. He removes a piece of tissue paper and sees a note. He smiles as he sees your familiar handwriting that always got Jamie’s heart racing back in high school.

Jamie,

Thank you so much for the soup last night. How did you know it was my favorite? I didn’t have your phone number, so I am leaving this for you. Enjoy a small treat from home! Again, thank you.

Yn

Jamie smiles and peers into the bag. Inside, Jamie finds a bag of snacks that are endemic to the Toronto area. Only, you would know what his favorites were. “It’s from Yn,” Jamie tells his curious teammates.

This gets a few raised eyebrows and snickers from the people that were currently in the locker room.

“Why did she leave you a gift?” Roope asks.

“I bought her some soup and had it delivered to her house yesterday because I heard she was sick. This is her thank you.” Jamie blushes with these words and can’t meet anyone’s eye.

“You got her soup?” John asks curiously. What did this mean? “Are you trying to date her?”

Jamie pales. “What? No. She just wasn’t feeling well, so I tried to make her feel better.”

John smirks. “How did you know exactly what she would want?”

Jamie, not realizing that his teammates were setting him up, answered obliviously. “It was always her favorite growing up.”

“And how do you know this?”

“Because I loved her, still do.”

This was not the answer that everyone was expecting. “What?” someone asks.

“What?” Jamie looks up from the note to see everyone staring at him.

“You love Yn? The girl who hates you? The girl who you treated like absolute shit your entire life?” Roope confirms.

“I, yeah, I loved her. In middle school and elementary school, I just messed with her because she was a girl and, you know when you have a crush on a girl that young, you tease her.”

“No, you don’t,” Miro says.

Jamie glares at his teammate. “Whatever, not the point. I thought I was being obvious, and then in high school, I realized I was in love with her.”

“You wanted to treat her right, but you knew she’d find it suspicious.”

“I forgot about my feelings when she went to college and my career picked up, but when I saw her that first time I, just,” Jamie stops talking because he isn’t sure how to continue.

“Realized your feelings.”

“I don’t know what to do.”

“Maybe just talk to her? Tell her how you feel?” John suggests.

“That probably won’t work. How do I tell her that I’ve been in love with her since we were three and I treated her terribly because I was scared of my feelings? Oh, and I ruined any possibility of her dating anyone in high school because I was a jealous idiot who couldn’t figure anything out.”

Jamie’s words get a few pitiful glances, “that sucks”, and pats on the shoulder. No one knows what to say or do. Jamie was in love with the one person who might never love him back.

. . .

Walking into the ballroom, you were trying to find your boss so that you could tell her that you were here. Tonight was the annual Casino Night and you were working behind the scenes to make sure the night went smoothly. This was the first time you were attending because last year, the marketing team didn’t need you to work it, and you also caught a cold right before.

“Oh, hey, yn’s here,” Carrie calls out and crosses your name off the list. “Perfect, you’re going to be sitting at the table in the front welcoming guests and stuff. You are going to ask for their name, ID, and ticket. Once you do that, you’ll tell them their table number and give them a gift bag. A few of the players will be serving as ushers tonight, so they’ll bring the guests to their tables.”

You nod. You want to ask who the players are, but you don’t want to sound eager.

“The organization assigned Roope Hintz, Denis Gurianov, and Jason Dickinson as ushers. They also put Jamie Oleksiak. I know the two of you have some hardcore animosity between you two, so if you don’t want him there, then we can get someone else.”

“Oh, don’t worry, we’ll be okay,” you tell Carrie. For the first time in your life, you were serious. Things between you and Jamie were cordial and professional. You still hated him like crazy but significantly less than when you were growing up. You weren’t even sure that you and Jamie would be at this point, but here you two both were.”

“Okay, great, why don’t I bring you to your station and show you how the software works,” Carrie says and leads you to the entrance of the ballroom. The next ten minutes pass, and you think you’ve got the software and system figured out pretty well that you should be okay. Carrie told you to organize the table in any way that’s fitting to your needs, so you begin to reorganize based on how you think you’ll be able to work more efficiently.

Walking to the front entrance from the back entrance are the ushers. Leading the pack is Jamie and Roope. They were walking and talking casually when Jamie suddenly stopped in his tracks.

“Keep walking,” Jason says and smacks Jamie over the head.

“What are you staring at - oh,” Roope follows Jamie’s eye line and spots you organizing the table.

“She’s so beautiful,” Jamie says with heart eyes. You were wearing a dark green dress that fell just above your knees and matching green stilettos. Your hair was done in the way that you knew looked best. Jamie recognized it as the same way you did your hair for Senior Prom and graduation.

“You know, maybe tonight you should tell her?” Denis suggests.

“I don’t think so,” Jamie says with reluctance. “I know she doesn’t feel the same.”

“Then try not to stare or gape too much, then.”

Jamie nods. “We should head to where we need to be, right?”

The four boys continue walking to where you were. “Hey, yn,” Roope greets you.

You look up and smile. “Hi, well, you guys clean up nicely.”

“As do you,” Jamie tells you, and the heat rushes to your face. So, Jamie was complimenting you now.

“Um, so, I’ll be greeting guests and taking their ticket information,” you explain. “Your job, which you've probably been briefed on, is to escort them to their table numbers.”

“‘Briefed on’?” Jason begins. “Are we in some kind of spy or FBI movie?”

“Very funny,” you say sarcastically. “Not the point, but that’s it basically. I think Ryan from marketing will be here to help me with the tickets. Carrie told me that two of you will be on my side of the table and two on Ryan’s side.”

Ryan suddenly appears and greets you with a hug. “You look nice, yn.”

“Thanks, Ryan, you clean up well, too,” you say back to him. You don’t catch the glare that Jamie was giving to Ryan. “I was just explaining what we’re going to be doing tonight to the boys. Two will be working with you and two with me.”

“Perfect, thanks for briefing them; you four can talk amongst yourselves as to who you’re going to be working with. I don’t care either way.”

“See?” you look pointedly at Jason. “Ryan used ‘brief’, too. Oh, I also don’t care. Actually, I’m going to head to the washroom quickly before people start to arrive.”

You get up and walk away, but you don’t notice Jamie watching you leave. He was incredibly captivated with you and wants nothing more than to sweep you up and kiss you. He wants to profess his love to you and love you forever. Sadly, you would never feel the same way as a result of how he treated you growing up. Jamie is drawn out of his thoughts by Jason smacking his arm.

“Dude, you have to stop staring,” Jason says.

“Oh, you like her?” Ryan asks. “She’s quite a catch.”

“Oh, no, I don’t,” Jamie denies. He gets stares from his teammates. Jamie isn’t sure why he denied having feelings for you. You weren’t even here to hear them anyways.

“Good, I like her, and I think I’m going to ask her out. I wasn’t going to say anything if you liked her, but since you don’t, I should be okay to do so.”

Jamie nods but locks his jaw. “Excuse me, I have to go to the washroom, too.” Jamie walks to the bathroom angrily. Of course, Ryan likes you, who wouldn’t? Why couldn’t Jamie just tell Ryan he likes you? That way, Ryan won’t be asking you out. Too entranced in his thoughts, he runs right into you, again.

“Oof, wow, hi Jamie,” you say to him giggly after regaining your composure. “I should stop doing this, you know, running into you. Are you okay?”

“Um, yeah, why?”

“You look really angry and pissed off.”

“Oh, well, I’m not, so, don’t worry,” Jamie says in a voice that doesn’t express what he just said.

You laugh softly.

“What?” Jamie asks.

“You say you’re not angry, but your tone says anything but,” you explain with an amused smile. You look up to meet Jamie’s eyes, and you see the fury going on in his head. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing, don’t worry about it,” Jamie brushes you off and walks away toward the washroom.

You want to yell after him, but you don’t feel it’s your place to do so.

“Oh good, you’re back,” Ryan says to you. “Jamie and Jason are going to be your ushers and Roope and Denis will be mine.”

You nod and sit down. So, Jamie was going to be closer to you than you thought. “Perfect.”

When Jamie gets back from the washroom and sees you talking to Ryan in a much too friendly manner for his liking, Jamie sulks again. This was going to be a long night.

Somehow, despite his anger and frustration, Jamie was able to put that all aside as he was working as an usher for the Casino Night. Just being near you and around you was enough to calm him down. Watching you interact with the guests made Jamie’s heart warm. He always knew that you were incredibly caring to everyone you met; he just didn’t know that your actions would make him melt and fall more in love with you. After about an hour and a half of welcoming guests, Carrie walks over and says that one group can go and get something to eat. She walks away and the six of you talk amongst yourselves as to who should go. The decision is made for you when two guests walk up to you and begin pulling out their IDs. Out of the corner of your eye, you watch Ryan, Roope, and Denis head into the ballroom to have dinner. After welcoming them in, Denis ushers the guests to their table. You take a breath of releasing exhaustion and Jamie smiles at you.

“Tired?” he asks.

“Yeah, it’s a lot of people to talk to; when I took this job, I thought it would just be marketing, not the rest of this, too,” you tell him. “It’s a very versatile job.”

“Well, if it weren’t versatile, then we wouldn’t have ever come into contact with each other, right?”

“Yeah, I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing yet.”

Jamie looks you in the eye. “Well, I think it’s a good thing. A very good thing.”

You raise your eyebrows at him. “Oh yeah?” you say to Jamie, and he nods. “I’ll take that into consideration as I make my decision.”

Jamie chuckles deeply, and you feel the shivers go up your spine.

“Hey, can I ask you something?” you ask Jamie.

“Sure,” he tells you.

“Why were you, actually never mind,” you stop asking, seeing Denis walking back to the table.

Jamie was about to question why, but he sees Denis and another guest approaching. He takes this as the reason that you stopped talking. You put on a bright smile and begin talking to the guests and welcoming them. Jamie ushers them into the ballroom after you talk and gives you a wink. You feel the warmth reach your face; you see Denis shaking his head and you question him.

“Just give him a chance,” he replies to you.

“What?” you ask confused.

“I’m serious, just give him a chance.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“You will, just give him a chance when you realize you know what I’m talking about.”

You nod. What in the world could he be talking about?

Three hours after the event starts, Carrie comes over to the six of you and tells her that you were all relieved of your duties and were free to enjoy the event. You weren’t sure what to do now.

“Where are you headed?” Jamie asks.

“I’m not sure, you?”

“What do you mean you’re not sure?”

“I’ve never been to one of these before, and most of my friends are working or have their own dates. I don’t have a table to sit at and don’t want to intrude.”

Jamie nods. He extends his arm for you, and you look at him skeptically.

“What?” you ask.

“Dance with me,” he tells you.

You want to tell him he’s crazy and that there was no way in hell that you were going to dance with him. However, you wanted to. You wanted to dance with Jamie, so you loop your arm through his and he leads you into the ballroom. The two of you find a spot on the dance floor and maneuver yourselves into a dancing position. Jamie rests his two hands on your waist and you reach up to wrap your arms around his neck. You giggle softly; your hands don’t reach because Jamie is too tall.

“What?” he asks.

“You’re too tall; I can’t get my arms to go around your neck,” you tell him.

“Oh,” Jamie says. His eyes suddenly light up. He removes one of his hands from your waist and takes your hand. “Now, you put one of your hands on my back. This work?”

You do as he says and nods. “Yeah, and now we dance!”

“That we do.”

You and Jamie begin swaying with the music. You remember that you had a question you wanted to ask Jamie, so you decide to prompt him with it now. “Hey, Jamie?”

“Yes, ynn?”

“Why were you so upset earlier?” you ask.

Jamie suddenly stiffens, and you begin tracing patterns on his back with your hand to try to calm him down. “No reason.”

“So, you mean to tell me that you just get angry for no apparent reason?”

“No, I did get angry for a certain reason.”

“Care to share? A penny for your thoughts?”

What about a kiss for my thoughts. “It’s stupid. Ryan just said something I didn’t like, so I got angry.”

“Oh, okay.”

Jamie smiles at you, and you both continue to dance to the song. When the song ends, you begin to release your grasp of Jamie, but he doesn’t do the same.

“Jamie, the song's over.”

“I know, one more?” he asks. You want to say yes, but you aren’t sure why you don’t want to. You aren’t sure what this shift in your relationship is, but you need some time to figure it out on your own.

“I’m sorry, my feet hurt, I think I’m going to head to the back with staff and just rest, okay?” you pivot.

Jamie nods and releases his hold on you. “I probably have to do some sucking up to the donors and stuff.”

“Oh yeah, probably,” you tease. “See you later?”

“Absolutely, yes,” Jamie says to you, and the two of you go your separate ways. You head to the back to find Carrie, and Jamie heads to his teammates.

“So, did you finally tell her?” Denis asks excitedly.

“No,” Jamie says glumly.

The team gathered at this certain location all shook their heads in annoyance. When will the two of you finally realize these things?

You’re sitting in the back kitchen with a piece of chocolate cake as the event wraps up. Carrie told you that you could just sit in the back if you didn’t want to go out. Yeah, that’s what you did. You didn’t want to see Jamie again because you didn’t know what the shift in your guys’ relationship was. You needed to talk to Lisa as soon as you could before you saw Jamie again. Sadly, the universe didn’t care that much about what you felt.

“Is this the pity party?” Jamie asks as he sits across from you. He grabs the fork in your hand and takes a bite out of your cake.

“Hey!” you jokingly scold. “And no, this isn’t a pity party. I just don’t have anywhere else to go.”

“You could have come and found me, you know.”

You open your mouth to say something but close it right away.

“What?” Jamie asks with his mouth full of cake.

“Stop eating my cake,” you tell him and take your fork out of his hand. “Should you really be eating this anyway?”

“It’s cake.”

“Yeah, and you’re a professional athlete.”

“I don’t follow.”

You sigh. “Aren’t you supposed to be eating only healthy things?”

“I guess, yeah.”

“But you’re eating cake.”

“Oh, now I get what you're saying,” Jamie says to you. “Just don’t tell the nutrition staff.”

“Then maybe you should wipe that chocolate icing off your face,” you joke.

“Oops, my bad,” Jamie begins wiping the icing off his face but misses.

“Here, let me,” you say and scoot your chair closer to him. You use your thumb and wipe the icing off your face. “Better.”

“Thank you,” Jamie says to you, and his face gets closer to yours so close that your foreheads are touching. “Yn, can I tell you something?”

“Of course,” you say to him, realizing how close your face is to his.

“You know how you asked me earlier today about why I was mad?” Jamie asks, and you nod. “Well, I wasn’t entirely telling you the truth. Yes, Ryan said something I didn’t like. When you walked to the washroom, I was staring at you because you were so beautiful. One of the guys told me to stop staring at you, and Ryan asked if I liked you. I don’t know why, but I told him no even though I’m so in love with you. Ryan then said that he was going to ask you out, and I got mad. I got mad because I want to be the one to love you, and I think Ryan might be the one to get that first.”

You pull back slightly, shocked. “What?”

“I’m in love with you; I always was.”

There’s no way you feel the same way. Where did that come from? “What? No, Jamie. You don’t know what you’re talking about. You’ve treated me like shit our entire life. There is no way you’re in love with me. No, you’re not. I’m sorry, I have to go.” You get up abruptly and walk out of the kitchen.

You walk to go find Carrie, so you could tell her you were going to head home. You were going to tell her you feel sick, which you do. You find Carrie and tell her you’re going to head home. She says it’s fine, and you head to the exit.

“Yn, wait, don’t leave because of me,” Jamie says to you as you’re about to leave. Somehow, he found you and was following you.

“No, Jamie, if you didn’t want me to leave, you shouldn’t have said those things to me. Why? Do you hate me that much that you want to mess with me so badly?”

“What? No, of course not. I don’t hate you, yn!”

“That’s rich; I’m leaving. Goodnight, Jamie.”

You don’t see the fallen look on Jamie’s face as you walk away, but his teammates do. Jamie goes back to his table but doesn’t say anything. Why did he think you’d ever feel the same way? Because he was nice for a few months? No, he should have known better. This was his fault, and he had to live what he did.

You held in your tears until you got to your car. The minute your door closed, you broke down. How dare he do this to you? How dare Jamie say something like that to mess with you? What was his problem? Why would he do that?

You and Jamie both went home miserable that night. Jamie went home heartbroken, and you went home angry and annoyed. What happens next?

. . .

You called in sick the Monday after Casino Night. You weren’t ready to face Jamie even though you knew that you’d probably not see him. You weren’t sure what to think. Jamie was always someone that you knew would be in your life. However, you always thought he’d be there as your lifelong enemy who you happened to still be in semi-contact with because your parents were friends. As of late, though, you’ve been seeing Jamie as a friend. You weren’t going to lie, you found Jamie ridiculously attractive, and ever since the accident you had where you and Jamie finally talked, you began to see him in a different light. Instead of your first thought being how much you hated him, you thought about the good things he had to himself. You saw how friendly he was to everyone, and he always asked how you were. He had a selflessness to himself that you were starting to love about him.

“Why are you telling me all this, yn?” Lisa asks you exasperated. “I always thought that the two of you were perfect for each other, even in high school. Don’t lie, you thought about it, too.”

You pause for a moment carefully thinking about what you were going to say. “I guess you’re right. I did have a small crush on him in high school because, for almost six months, he was mostly nice to me.”

“And what about now?”

“I don’t know.”

“Do you want to know what I think?”

“Yes, please, Lisa.”

“I think you’re in love with him, too. I think you always have been; I think he’s one of those people that is always going to be in your life whether or not you like it. At first, everyone thought you two were going to be the best of friends and take over the world. That all changed when he tripped you and the rest is history, but I think it’s different now. This time around, you both are mature adults who, I think, subconsciously realized that the way they dealt with the crushes they had on each other was by absolutely hating each other. You both didn’t know what to do, so you’re coping mechanism? Hate each other senselessly because you didn’t know what else. Now, Jamie realized how he feels and wants that with you. He said it first, right? Maybe he wants to show you he’s changed and truly loves you now.”

“I guess you’re kind of right,” you tell Lisa. “I just, I don’t know how I feel.”

“Do you find him attractive?”

“Yes, of course, he’s gorgeous.”

“Did you always think that?”

“Yes, because he’s always been gorgeous.”

“Was one of the reasons you hated him because he was so gorgeous?”

“Yeah, I’m not sure where you’re going with this, Lisa,” you tell your best friend skeptically.

“My point is that if you truly hated him, you wouldn’t have called him gorgeous so quickly. I think you would have just denied finding him attractive and that’s that. Now that you know what nice and kind Jamie is like, I think you want more. You want to have more with him because you’ve seen what a great person Jamie is. Because you’ve seen the goodness, you want more and all of it. Can you say that you currently hate Jamie Oleksiak with your entire being?”

“No, I cannot say that I hate Jamie Oleksiak with my entire being.”

“Your first reaction to him telling you how he feels was not to punch him or to hurt him, was it?”

“No, I guess it wasn’t,” you say calmly.

“What was it then, yn?”

“In my head, and I don’t know why I said it, but it was ‘there’s no way you feel the same way', and I was surprised those words even formed in my head.”

“Don’t you see, yn? You feel the same way! You just didn’t know it! Your head and heart have been trying to tell you how you feel by spreading warmth to your face, making you feel shy, or just wanting to be around him. Yn, you’re in love with Jamie Oleksiak.”

“Holy shit, I’m in love with Jamie Oleksiak.”

“You’re in love with Jamie Oleksiak, yn.”

“Oh dear goodness, what do I do now, Lisa?”

“Apologize and tell him.”

You take a deep breath. “Yeah, I can do that, right?”

“If you want to be with him, then yeah.”

“Okay, I can do that, it shouldn’t be too hard, right? What could possibly go wrong?”

. . .

Believe it or not, a lot. The next day, you were set to go back to work, but you woke up with a massive migraine, an aching cough, and a debilitating stomach ache. You couldn’t go to work feeling like this, so you called in sick for real this time. You finally had the courage to go see a doctor, and they told you it was just a bug. They gave you some antibiotics, and you were back to work in three days.

On the Saturday after Casino Night, Carrie asked if you could fill in for the media team, and you agreed enthusiastically. Maybe you’d finally be able to see Jamie and talk to him?

Unfortunately, that was not the case. You weren’t outright trying to talk to Jamie or get his attention, but you weren’t not doing that. You tried to act normal, but Jamie wouldn’t even acknowledge you. You were able to catch him alone after the game, but when you called out to him, he didn’t respond. You went home that night crying thinking you ruined something great without knowing you had something great at the tip of your fingers.

The following Monday, you were sitting in the GM’s offices when Jamie walked in looking for one of the team managers. You were the one of two sitting in the room, and Jamie walked to the other person who was on the far side of the room to ask if the manager was there. You’ll admit, that hurt.

You saw Jamie a few days later on your way to the locker room to give some paperwork to the coaching staff. You were about to turn the corner when your foot got stuck in a loose floorboard, and you went tumbling to the ground.

“Are you okay?” someone asks you as you try to get up.

“I mean, considering I just fell to the ground, no, but thanks for asking,” you answer and lookup. “Jamie.”

“Yn,” he replies back to you. “I’m going to go.”

“Jamie, wait, please.”

“What, yn? Are you going to reject me again because I don’t want to have that conversation with you, then.”

“When we both aren’t at work and in a public place, can we please talk?”

“Why should I agree to that, yn? Because, for your information, you’re breaking my heart. I can’t do this if you’re just going to make me feel terrible.”

You falter slightly when Jamie tells you that you’re breaking his heart. “I’m really sorry, can we just please pick a time and place to talk?”

“Sure, right here, right now.”

“Jamie, that’s not what I --”

“No, if you want to talk, then right here. I don’t want to have this conversation later if you’re going to reject me again.”

You’re getting kind of sick and tired of Jamie insisting that you’re going to reject him again because you’re not. “Jamie! I’m not going to reject you again! Do you think I’m some kind of heartless monster who loves to see you suffer? Guess what, I don’t! I hate that my words made you hurt and put you in a terrible mood. I apologize for that. You know you got to speak your mind, isn’t it time for me to be able to speak mine?”

Jamie is about to say something, but you stop him.

“No, I’m not going to break your heart, I promise. Just listen, okay?”

Jamie nods and takes one step towards you.

“Casino Night? You caught me off guard. My entire life, I hated you and that was all I knew. Wake up? Hate Jamie. Go to bed? Hate Jamie. You have to admit, though, you didn’t make it hard, but that’s beside the point. When I literally ran into you all those months ago, I picked up where we left off because that was all I knew. Then, come to find out, I didn’t like that. When I tripped over your foot and we talked? That was the shift inside of me. I didn’t know what I was feeling. The next few things I’m going to say I didn’t makeup on my own, Lisa helped me with it. She told me that I got to experience nice and kind Jamie, and I loved it. I did, I loved being on the receiving end of it. She was saying how I wanted more, all of the love and kindness you have to offer. She’s not wrong. I want everything you have to offer because I’m in love with you.”

“What?”

“Casino Night? I didn’t know what I was feeling. If you gave me a bit more time, on my own, then I think I would have realized it soon. I’m not sure if you know this, but in sophomore year of high school, I had a crush on you because, for once, you were quite nice to me. I like nice Jamie because he makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Jamie Oleksiak, I’m in love with you even though I spent almost twenty years hating you. And, that’s all I have to say, so I’m going to go now.”

You begin to turn around, but Jamie’s next words leave you stunned. “I’ve had a crush on you since we were three.”

“What?”

“When we were three years old, I realized I had a crush on you. I wouldn’t have called it a crush, but I always saw how in love my parents were and one day wanted that with you. You know how children get ‘married’? Well, I wanted to marry you. I didn’t know how to process how I felt so I treated you like shit and for that, I’m sorry. I realized I was in love with you in high school, but at that point, too much damage was created for me to go back and change things. When I saw you again a few months back, I realized that I never really got over you, and I wanted more with you.”

You take a step forward. “So.”

“So?”

“So, we’re two idiots who are in love with each other, then?”

“So we are,” Jamie says to you with a smile.

“Now what do we do?” you ask.

“Well, I’d like to take you out for dinner and maybe kiss you? Then, take you out for dinner again and call you my girlfriend. What do you think?”

“I think you should kiss me now and we can just jump to the ‘I’m your girlfriend’ part.”

“That’s a deal,” Jamie says and leans down to kiss you. He places a gentle kiss on your lips before leaning back to take a breath. He leans in again, and you both deepen the kiss he places on your lips. All of five seconds pass when you hear cheering behind you. “I guess this is why you wanted to talk in private, right?”

You laugh. “Yeah, it was. Maybe you should listen to me more often.”

“Well, now that you’re my girlfriend, I guess I have more of a reason to.”

“And why’s that?”

“So I get to keep you and love you forever?”

You smile and say, “that I can do.” You perch upon your tippy-toes and kiss Jamie again. Who knew that two childhood enemies could one day learn to love each other?

Taglist: @goalision @coffee-ontherocks @glassdanse @barzal-burakovsky @petey-patty @beauvibaby @boqvistsbabe @rmaye @heatherawoowoo @heaveniish @stars-canucks @tkapuckit @mellany1997 @nhlboyshavemyhart88 @heybarzy @2manytabsopen @habsfan @besthockeyfics @plds2000 @kaitieskidmore1 @iwantahockeyhimbo @sidscrosbyy @barzysandmarnersbitch @ollywahlygator @leafs-forever @laurenairay @no-pucks-given @sixmapleleafs (Join my taglist here!)

[frosted-night]

Do you have any headcanons for cast as humans? I mean as a human au. (If this is too big of an ask thats fine)

BOY DO I

Let me just get my tome out n read y'all the lore I've made for no reason.

Jack

Left home after graduating to join a caravan and traveled across the country. He came back home after his parent's sudden deaths. He didn't want to leave his brother to deal with the estate by himself.

He still has his van from his adventures and he wants to paint it again to symbolize his new phase in life. It still has living accomdations inside it and Jack has little desire to change it.

He has a few tattoos, such as a hurricane symbol on his neck and a snowflake above one of his ankles. Jack also has a few ear piercings he did himself and he's surprisingly good at it.

If Jack isn't driving he travels by longboard. He had a skater boy phase but it payed off since he can still do a few tricks here and there.

(Sometimes I see human Jack either as cis or trans. It depends on how im feeling. A trans Human Jack post will be seperate from this one)

He's a skilled forager and grower since he had to do that as his years as a nomad. Jack wouldn't claim he's as skilled as Aster but he can be a runner up behind him.

Jack never had a solid relationship on the road. It was very fleeting feelings but he didn't seem to mind. Settling back down at his hometown had reawakened some buried feelings though.

He's fairly well known in his hometown for being a mischievous bastard in his teen years and his past with playing on the local hockey team.

Jack would describe his aesthetic as a love child of punk and free spirited hippie lifestyle.

He has unmedicated adhd

He's 6 or 7 years older than his younger brother Manny and it can make their relationship a bit strained. These days they are trying to mend it while taking care of their parent's old home.

His hair was originally brown but he bleaches it and dyes it white these days.

Manny (Mim)

He's one of the youngest in his friend group, beating Tooth by a few months.

Manny is the 2nd shortest, Sandy being the shortest.

Jack leaving home wasn't easy for him and after a while Manny fell out of contact. He regrets it to this very day but never stopped thinking about his big brother.

He has Thalassophobia, a fear shared with Jack, and Pitch teases him endlessly about it.

He's a natural blonde and his mom used to tell him that he got it from his dad's side of the family. Manny has yet to meet any of his extended family for some reason.

Cleaning out his parents house of their things was one of the hardest parts for him and would have been impossible if his friends didn't help him. (Jack coming home really changed the game too.)

He was a fairly average kid but had a streak of being kind of mean in school. It lasted until high school but he still carries that silver tongue between his teeth.

Tooth jokes about how often Manny visits the local aquarium and he deflects any guesses she makes. North knows Manny is crushing hard on a employee there and has a code word for the guy, "Ocean Man". Aster hums the song whenever he feels like he can poke fun of Manny.

His occupation is working at a pre-school/daycare. He's shockingly amazing with children and has considered a teaching position there but he has yet to decide on it.

Manny has been called a "night owl" by all his friends since his productivity increases when the sun goes down. Thats usually the time he gets to work on all the cleaning he's missed.

He currently lives in his childhood home with his brother. Thankfully their home was paid off by their parents so they just split the bills, but they have considered getting a roomie to help with the expenses.

His dream is to have any kind of a pool in his backyard but he has to wait til the finances balance themselves out.

Pitch

Was the newest person in the group before Jack joined. He's also one of the oldest.

His occupation is a horror novel writer and lives off of coffee even when hes not crunching to meet deadlines.

Pitch fights with insomnia but Sandy convinced him to start taking medication to help him sleep. He got kind of sick hearing Pitch make quick meals at 3am and tripping over his cat.

He has a cat named Onyx and he has that backpack with a window on it that he can put Onyx in. Onyx likes it very much and if she knows hes leaving somewhere she sits by the backpack and stares at him.

Halloween is when he's at his strongest. If he feels like it, he competes with North on who has the best decorations. Jack gave Pitch the idea of using dry ice and its a feature he brings back every other year or so.

He's one of the tallest people in the group, only coming a few inches shorter than North. Contrary to people asking him, he was never into basket ball and was was in the military for a period of time.

Pitch was living a hermit life until he was adopted into the group. With his wife long deceased and freshly dumped, he softly considers it a saving grace that everyone accepted him.

Katherine

An aspiring writer, she currently works at the neighborhood library. She finds it really relaxing since its sat right by a river bed.

She tries not to bug Pitch too much but on occassion she asks him to beta read her works. His criticism and tips energize her to get her works out there ten fold. Kat really wants to write fantasy, a little romance and a lot of kid's books.

Her favorite task at work is reading to kids. Shes an animated storyteller and the kids eat her antics up.

She was great friends with Jack when they were growing up but she followed his antics on a few of his accounts online.

She listens to a lot of rock music and punk pop due to North's influence when she was growing up. He's taken to her to her first concert and she treasures the merch and memories.

She gets around by bike because she hasn't gotten her lisence yet but North gives her lessons on the weekends. Kat's become a local cryptid because everyone has seen her whiz past on her bike at least once though.

A child(Jamie) she read to got her into cryptids and now she eats up any lore she can. They like to infodump on each other when they have the time.

This is post is long enough golly gosh. If y'all are interested i can post the others but for now take these samples. (The Hockey player Jack hc n ex military Pitch hc were influenced by a lovely fic written by my friends over at @bunnimew. Their fic is Surviving On Twinkies And Hope and i highly reccomend it)

[friendlyneighborhoodsecretary]

"We should've listened to Pepper."

"I know."

"Scratch that—you should have listened to Pepper."

"Story of my life, kid."

"Actually, you should have listened to Pepper and Happy and Rhodey since they all told you not to use so much lighter fluid with the—"

"Excuse me, who between us was bemoaning the lack of flame involved in proper grilling? You wanted a volcano effect, we had a volcano effect."

"...and also not a single, solitary, edible kebab," Peter grumbled as he trailed Tony through the chilly aisles of the produce section. Or, more accurately, through the singular produce aisle that the singular grocery store within a twenty-mile radius of the lake house possessed. Apparently, Tony had been going for solitude when he picked out his patch of countryside and solitude he had gotten. Along with an alarming lack of good grocery options for kid accustomed to bodegas on every corner.

Half an hour earlier, the grill under the lakeside pavilion had been loaded down with an array of veggie kebabs. There had been thick slices of zucchini, hearty chunks of sweet onion, delicate little cherry tomatoes, and fat bell peppers bursting with color, all of them harvested from the tidy little garden that butted up to the lake house's back door. And all of them now smoldering in tidy piles of ash in the bottom of said grill. And sure, maybe Peter had egged on the pyrotechnics a little hard—but neither he nor Tony had expected that column of flame to be quite so intense. The only silver lining to the situation was the fact that DUM-E was safely hibernating in the workshop, not hovering at a close enough range to douse them, the grill, and the pile of assorted yet-to-be-grilled burgers with flame retardant.

Tony and Peter had been summarily demoted from grillmasters to delivery guys and sent out to hunt down new veggies while the burgers were looked after by more capable chefs. Which, technically, could have been literally anyone else but them, Peter supposed with a grimace. Happy had been scrubbing down the grill when they left while Rhodey collected burger orders and Pepper hunted through the cabinets for fresh wood chips. May was sitting cross-legged on a lounge chair with Morgan, letting her demonstrate one of those complicated clapping games that sprout up in daycares everywhere. Peter wasn’t sure who would actually end up doing the grillwork once they managed to excavate the grill from all that ash, but to be honest, he had a lot more faith in whatever they would come home to than in whatever charred hockey pucks the two of them would’ve created.

Even if it had been fun.

"Relax about it, it's fine—we'll have kebabs." Tony stalked past a few narrow displays of locally grown peaches and watermelons, bypassing the seasonal fruit in favor of the vegetables just beyond them. Peter broke into an easy lope to catch back up. Tony was moving faster than any of them had expected now that he was back on his feet—there were still moments of shakiness, of passing weakness that prompted a quick sit-down—but he seized any moments of strength with both hands. Whether it was an opportunity to blow up a grill or just a grocery store run. "May not be farmer's market quality, but they'll do."

He unspooled a long swath of plastic vegetable baggies and pushed half into Peter's hands. "You ever been to a farmer's market? Good produce, weird little soaps, farm animals? It's cute. Rustic. You'd love it.” He picked his way down the display, idly poking and prodding and occasionally selecting something for his share of the bags. “We'll have to go on Saturday. Maybe pick up a friend for Gerald."

"You got Gerald at a farmer's market?" Peter was grinning even as the question popped out. Somehow, it wasn’t surprising. “Is that even legal? Is that a thing out here in the sticks? Alpaca mills instead of puppy mills?”

“Excuse me?” Tony swung around to point at him with the business end of a bell pepper. “Are you questioning Gerald’s pedigree? I bring you into my home, I feed you—”

“Technically, we haven’t eaten yet.”

“—shelter you—”

“Also, I’m pretty sure Pepper’s the one who texted May the invite.”

“—let you set my belongings on fire—”

“Hey, you were the one holding the lighter fluid!”

“—and you insult a member of my household? This is the thanks I get?” Tony shook his head, the glimmer of a smile flaring under the sarcasm as he turned for a dramatic exit to the next display down. “Kids these days.”

Peter laughed as he scuttled down the aisle in Tony's wake, the streaming tail of the remaining plastic produce baggies waving behind him like a banner. It was all so blissfully…normal. Granted, normalcy might actually count as weirdness for them, given how infrequently they got to experience it, but Peter wasn’t complaining. This was good. He had missed this brand of misadventure, where the stakes were no higher than the fate of a few vegetables and the reward lay more in the doing than the achieving. It was summer, and he was exactly where he wanted to be—not in space, fighting for the universe. Not in Europe, fighting illusions. Not even in New York, fighting to get back to some semblance of status quo. He was here, bickering with Tony on the way to rejoin the rest of his family for a sunset over the lake and a burger that would probably still taste like lighter fluid. The only fighting he’d do would be with the mosquitoes and—though he strongly suspected that someone might trip off the edge of the dock by the end of the night, given the grill placement—the only real danger he expected was the inevitable war that came with Morgan’s bedtime.

He sighed as they finally swept out of the frigid air conditioning and back out into the enveloping afternoon humidity. All things considered, the summer wasn’t going half bad.

Burnt veggies and all.

[eloisexcabot]

⌠ SOPHIE TURNER, 22, CIS FEMALE, SHE / HER ⌡ welcome back to gallagher academy, ELOISE CABOT! according to their records, they’re a THIRD year, specializing in LINGUISTICS, CULTURE, & ASSIMILATION and SEDUCTION AND FLIRTATION; and they DID NOT go to a spy prep high school. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of red lipstick, a dog-earred russian language textbook, and a passport full of stamps. when it’s the scorpio’s birthday on 11/17/1997, they always request their CRAB CAKES from the school’s chefs. looks like they’re well on their way to graduation. 

About Eloise 

Full Name: Eloise “Lou” Amelia Cabot 

Age: 22

Birthday: November 17th

Zodiac: Scorpio

MBTI: ESTP

Gender: Cis female 

Sexuality: Heterosexual 

Birthplace: Maryland, USA

Bio

Born the second child of Senator Linda Cabot from Maryland, Lou’s life has always been in the public eye. From the moment that she was born, everything she knew revolved around her mother’s political career. 

With her mother being in the Senate and her father coming from old Virginia money (one of her ancestors actually signed the Declaration), Lou’s childhood is probably what you expected; violin and horseback riding lessons starting from when she was 5, D.C. elite private schools since daycare, fall afternoons playing field hockey, and never a hair of out place because god forbid the papers say that the Cabot family looked anything less than posh and put together. 

As she got older, Lou knew that she wanted to get into government somehow but she just wasn’t sure how exactly. She didn’t want to be like her mother, busting her ass and kissing others with the largest and fakest smile on her face as she made promises that she wouldn’t be able to keep to hopeful people, always being scrutinized and criticized for every decision. After college she knew that she didn’t want to be like so many other girls that became interns in the Capital with big dreams that soon got crushed by reality. And lobbying? Definitely not for her. 

When she graduated, Lou was ready to follow family footsteps and attend an Ivy League, maybe Yale or Harvard, and then figure it out as she went. But then the letter from the Academy came and well...Yale and Harvard could go fuck themselves. 

After living her entire life in the public eye, the idea of being able to blend into any place, any culture, any sort of people and have no one have any idea of who she is was like a dream to Lou. And she’s always been fascinated with other cultures and loves traveling. 

And she’s not ignorant to how government actually works. It’s not the idyllic system that the founding fathers made it seem to be. Politics are dirty and gritty and bloodthirsty, with so much scheming and secrets behind the curtain, and thats exactly what Lou wants to get into. There will be no smiling behind a podium for her, she’ll be the one doing what she has to do to get vital information and getting her hands dirty in back rooms around the world. 

Personality

Never having been one for beating around the bush, Lou will tell you exactly what she thinks, even if its a hard truth. She’s grown up around too many politicians and got tired of all the bullshit. 

She’s also steadfast in her opinions, never wavering on them, which sometimes makes her too stubborn to listen to other people’s beliefs if she doesn’t agree with them. 

Once someone has her loyalty and friendship they have it no matter what; unless they do something to really fuck it up, then they lose it forever. 

Definitely likes to have to fun, but will also be the one stopping people before they get too out of control and do something stupid. 

Though she says she’s not a politician, Lou has one nasty competitive streak. 

Very intelligent and hard-working, but something has to really keep her attention and interest to get her fired up and passionate about it. If it doesn’t she gets bored easily. 

Misc

Has one older brother that has a bad case of tunnel vision in his quest for Congress

When she is home and away from the academy, Lou is very political; but she’s a good daughter and she does her best to support her mother ( who thank god is a Democrat). 

Don’t get her started on the 2020 race unless you want to hear hours of ranting 

Speaks 4 languages fluently - English, Russian, Mandarin, and Arabic. She’s working to improve her German and Spanish

Swears a lot since at school she has no one telling her to “be a lady.” 

Pretty good marksman but is working to improve her hand-to-hand combat. 

Post-graduation goal is to be a CIA agent.

Possible Connections

Best friend from since their first day of classes when they were just 18

Roomies that she can either love or despise 

Ex-boyfriend from when they were younger

Current boyfriend or FWB

Friends from her major

Study group 

Academic rival that she tries her best to always beat 

Anyone who might have possibly grown up in the same circle as her in DC

Give me drama, give me angst, give me love, give me friendship, give me all 

[sunflwrsjustdied]

Chapter 2 - The Phone Call.

Prologue

Chapter 1

Masterlist

Disclaimer: I did not write this story as a way to fetishize children having children. It is not about that. I wrote this story because I wondered what it would be like if Harry had a son, who also became a celebrity during Harry’s career. In order for the age of Harry’s sons to fit the career timeline I had to lower the age of Harry. I do not believe that children having children is a good thing nor do I try to fetishize it. I understand that this topic may be disturbing or disgusting to some people. If you do not like the idea of this story, then you don’t need to read it.

[Harry Styles sitting next to Ben Andrews (Lux’s cousin]

October.28.2012 London, England

•Harry• "Hello, Benjamin." Noah greeted Lux's cousin, Ben looked up shyly before mumbling a hi and then looking down.

"You're quite intimidating." I chuckled, seeing he made Ben, who was talking to everyone go quiet. He had the same effect on the hostess.

"Good." He mumbled, sitting down in the seat, he loved that feeling. No one wanting to talk to him out fear. Just a 9-year-old boy who made everyone terrified and thrived off of it.

I never understood why, but there were many people who got highly intimidated of him. For years people told me that 'the way he stands screams danger'.

He's been like this ever since primary school, daycare even. A real tough guy that got every girl attracted to him, even if they were just 4-years-old.

His first fight was at 2-years-old, it started off as a yelling match, until Noah threw punches at the boy who was a year older then him, all over a simple wooden block. The fight result in Noah getting a "red card" from his disturbed daycare teacher and a 3-year-old with a bloody lip.

If someone were to come between him and his persona, something so powerful will arise in him. He'll curse at them, throw things, anything to show them who they've messed with.

That made Noah who he was.

It showed how much he needed to like and trust you in order for vulnerability to show. Some people called him mysterious after this trait.

What a great combination, mysterious and dangerous. Described the 142 centimeter boy perfectly.

I never encouraged, nor discouraged his hunger for being persuaded that way. But it was never an act either, it was truly how Noah was, he's always been like that and he always will be.

I may not understand other peoples perspectives of him, but I could see where they were coming from in a way.

He was the most stereotypical boy you could ever meet. He looks at every girl, he runs around without a shirt on, he swears, he fights, he played every sport he could think of when he was younger. His most favourite sport of all time being baseball, followed by ice hockey. And he played both from when he was a toddler until he was 7. Anything boys "typically did" he did it all because it was the way of his personality.

Noah took a seat in-between Tom and I, he rested his elbow on the table and ran his hand throw his hair, I noticed his eyes would glance over at Ben with almost a look of jealousy in his eyes.

Oh.

Ben was sitting to the left of me. Ever since Noah was a baby, he always sat to the left of me at restaurants. Everyone in our family knew it and consciously never sat there, but a 4-year-old boy wouldn't know that.

"Noah!" Lux giggled, pointing to him trying to get out of Lou's lap, Lou gave Noah a look asking if she could go to him. Noah nodded and Lux ran over to him.

"Hello Luxie," Noah smiled lifting her into his lap.

Everyone talked waiting for the waitress.

She came eventually, but when she got to Noah, she stuttered, almost taken aback. "Wow, you're eyes are so blue. Oh God, I'm sorry. I've just never seen that before, " she said mesmerized.

"Thanks," Noah stared directly into her eyes, on purpose. "Sorry, um what can I get you?" "Fish and chips please."

• • •

"Dad, hide me please," Noah whispered, panic in his voice. "What, Why?" Harry frowned confused by his sons actions, "That waitress, I know her, now hide me! Don't draw attention."

"Who, her?" Tom nodded to the woman who was walking over to the table, specifically right behind Noah's chair.

Noah nodded, sinking in his chair and cover the side of his face.

"Hello, Noah." She smiled, her British accent was thick, "How's it going?"

"It's going great," Noah swallowed hard, his knee starting to bounce up and down.

"My daughter's still waiting on that call from you," She said, "And I'm still waiting for my phone to get fixed Lucy," Noah said with gritted teeth.

"It's been almost 2 months, how long can it take?" Lucy raised her eyebrow.

"As long as it needs to be fixed again." Noah replied, jaw clentched.

"Here's her number again, just in case you forget it," She immediately took out her pen and pad, writing on it fast, and handing it to him.

"Never- never in my life have I seen someone try to get their daughter to date someone so bad," Noah grunted, taking the paper and shook his head,

"Some parents want what's best for their children Noah, and I see that your are. Or to you, I'm a bad mother for that right?" Lucy frowned at Noah, trying to make him feel bad.

"We're nine- That's not even- I don't even remember her name Lucy." Noah sighed trying to argue but giving up, "It's Sabrina, Sabrina McCullen." Lucy smiled knowing she was breaking Noah to say yes.

"Just give my daughter a chance, she's a model too, maybe that'll somewhat change your mind." Noah's eyes did perk up hearing the information, "I told you, when the phones fixed," he smiled fake and widely, "Now have a nice day."

"We'll be waiting," Lucy walked off, and that's when Noah groaned, slouching down in his seat, about to crumple the paper.

"Keep it son, you'll need it." Noah looked up to his father with discomfort in his eyes, before putting it in his pocket.

"Who was that?" Tom asked, "I met her here a few months ago and a few times after that, she wouldn't shut up about how her daughter was my age and that we should date."

"She gave me her daughters number, so I told her my phone was broken and when it got fixed then I'd give her call."

"But Noah, your phone works perfectly, why haven't you?" Harry questioned, earning a glare from Noah, "Not what she thinks is it? If she knew that, she would probably try to get mine and I don't want that."

"Just call her, you never know," Harry suggested, "Yeah, if she's anything like her mother, I'll know for sure," Noah shook his head sighing.

"I'm surprised, I've never known my son to give up a chance with a girl," Harry chuckled, "Well almost every girl I don't meet through her annoying mother."

"Wait, are you saying, Noah is scared of someone? The Noah Styles, scared of someone?" Lou said in a some what genuinely shocked voice, earning an eye roll from Noah.

"No, I'm not scared of her, it's called avoiding someone you don't have an interest in someone."

A phone then started to ring at the table, "Oh Noah, it can't be yours. Yours is broken." Lucy said walking with the drinks our table ordered prior to our last order, along with another waitress.

Noah took in a deep breathe through his nose and let it out the same way, a look of annoyance on his features as he looked at a smirking Tom.

"I'm sorry, I need to take this." John apologized, looking at his phone and excusing himself and walking away from the table.

"You see what I mean," Noah said through gritted teeth, after she left, "Imagine having to see and hear that every time you visit your girlfriend."

"God I can hear it now. 'I'm the one who put you two together'. Probably trying to use my modelling career to make her daughter famous." Noah

"Then if you're not scared why don't you tell her that? Say you're not interested." Tom asked, intrigued, "Because I'm not that much of an asshole." Noah responded bluntly, "Hey, watch it," Harry scolded, knowing there was a much younger child sitting next to me and he nodded to him.

You'd think Harry would scold his son for swearing in general but boy did he give up on that a long time ago.

"It's fine, Harry," Dean, Lux's uncle and Ben's father laughed, "He's heard worse."

"But Noah, give her a chance, so what? Like you said you're just nine. It's not it will be long term and you're going to get married next week." Dean said, "Well to Lucy is it!" Noah grunted, "Aw, come on Noah. You never know," I smirked, "I'll think about it." Noah mumbled.

"Now can we please take about something else? God knows she listening or spiked my drink." Noah groaned, "Yes," Tom said and began talking to him about football.

•Harry• I saw John walk towards my chair, "Harry, I need to talk to you," John said quietly into my ear, I nodded "Sure," and followed him to the foyer.

"That was a call from a director, it was for Noah." He said to me, his demeanour serious.

I nodded, listening. "The director wants to meet him, and maybe cast him for a lead role. This is very important for Noah and his career," He explained. "But we both don't want to schedule a meeting unless you, Rose, or both of you give permission for it to happen."

"So Harry, would he be allowed to go to the audition?" He asked, "Well of course," I told him, without hesitation, "If it's something he'll want to do." Who I was kidding, Noah loved acting, and his first lead role in a movie would be amazing.

"Schedule it right now." I told him

"They said we could pick the date, but within now or next month. No later." "Where?" "New York." "Ok, ask if they're available for November 12."

"We'll be there around that time, and then we're leaving the next day. That's a good time to do it." John nodded and began to call the director back, telling him the details as well as listening to the directors.

After saying goodbye, he hung up the phone, "It's settled then. New York City, November 12. I'll talk to Noah later."

We both walked back to the table.

• • •

Dinner was finished, everyone was either talking or on their phones. Noah chose to be on his phone, what a mistake that was.

Lucy walked by the table, "So Noah," Noah jumped in his seat, startled by her sudden presence behind him, "Guess you got that phone fixed?" Noah swore he could just scream and yell at her, he was about to, so close to, until-

"It's actually my phone," Tom looked at her, grabbing the white iPhone 4S from Noah's hand, Lucy huffed and walked away.

"Oh my God, thank you. I was close to strangling her,"

• • •

It was late. Harry and Noah had just got home.

Noah was in room, emptying his pants pockets, and pulled out the stupid piece of paper. throwing it on the bed.

After brushing his teeth, Noah sat on his bed, picking up his phone and the paper. He sighed, looking in-between both objects. Fighting himself if he should just call her or not. Noah sighed going into his contacts and putting her name and number into his phone.

"Maybe one day," he mumbled tossing the note into his nightstand drawer.

[elysiumwaits]

I was tagged by @novemberhush which is great because I love to talk about myself. It’s a problem sometimes at work, but it’s great for when I’m in therapy and doing memes on the internet!

Rules: answer 15 questions and then tag 15 people

1) Are you named after anyone?

Kind of. So my name is Emily. My mom had a cat named Emma - my biological father (who was not a good man) was jealous of the cat, and, long story short, Mom did not have a cat because of this asshole. So she named me Emily because she liked the name. I’m essentially named after her favorite pet. My middle name is Marie, it’s a family name - the last person who had it before me was my Great Aunt Marie, and she was, I’m told, the kind of woman who would take no shit and no prisoners. My mother told me it’s a very fitting middle name for me.

That said, please, please, please don’t call me Emily. Em is okay, I go by that in real life, but I actually prefer Eli or Ely most of the time. 

2) When was the last time you cried?

Shit, son, I cry at the drop of a hat. Probably a couple days ago? I’m a frustration crier and a happy crier and a oh-shit-I-dropped-my-fork-again crier, so it just... doesn’t really register anymore.

3) Do you have kids?

No. I work in a daycare, specifically the infant room. I love it, but personally, I don’t feel like kids are currently in the plan. This may change - I love children, but right now I don’t trust anyone enough to share a child with them, nor am I financially or mentally stable enough to raise one. 

I am, however, extremely maternal, so I will probably eventually have one. Just one.

4) Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Mmm, kind of? I don’t suffer fools gladly, which is sometimes a problem because my mouth moves before my brain catches up. I don’t use sarcasm in a mean or mocking way with people who don’t know any better - I will exaggerate it to use it with children so they know, without a doubt, that it’s sarcasm and a joke. Adults who should know better than to do ridiculous things, though, are fair game. 

Take, for example, the woman who told me I didn’t dress professionally enough in the infant room because I was wearing leggings and a comfortable t-shirt.

I used sarcasm with her. “Oh, I’m sorry. You’re absolutely right, I’m sure you put makeup and heels on for [child]’s 4 am feedings, too, right?” And then I pointed out the stains on my shirt from baby food and formula. 

With kids, though, who are old enough to understand what sarcasm is, I’ll do a really exaggerated, over the top eyeroll and be like “Oh, goodness, we never ever go outside, do we? We’ve never gone outside a single day you’ve been here!” or something like that, because they laugh and they know it’s a joke. It also helps them develop critical thinking and communication skills.

5) What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Okay, so, I am a hypervigilant person thanks to a lot of PTSD-inducing trauma, so the first thing I notice about a person is usually how they hold themselves and if they have anything in their hand. I notice body language religiously - someone with an aggressive, threatening stance is immediately labeled a threat, whereas a person walking with arms to the side, shoulders back, and a general open body language is labeled not-a-threat.

That’s how I live my life, day to day. Threat or not-a-threat. Every single place I go.

I don’t recommend it.

6) What’s your eye colour?

Blue - apparently a very striking blue, I’ve been asked multiple times if I wear contacts. I do not.

7) Scary movie or happy ending?

HAPPY ENDING. And honestly, I have to know that beforehand or I have too much anxiety to enjoy the book/film/show/game.

8) Any special talents?

Writing, though that’s less talent and more intense and obsessive devotion to a craft. 

I hesitate to add: I’m also very good with tarot cards. Give me enough time with a person, one of my decks, and I can pry deep into their lives and tell them things about themselves that they’ve never revealed to another soul. It’s honestly terrifying. I have stories.

9) Where were you born?

Missouri. Technically in a helicopter, not actually in a hospital. It was a very emergency C-section, I was a month early, and Mom had actually coded. She likes to tell people that I’ve tried to kill her at least once!

10) What are your hobbies?

Writing, gaming, reading, Youtube videos and shows, crochet (less so lately, I have trouble remembering patterns these days). I write a lot, I read mostly fanfiction right now, I game when I can (usually Skyrim, Dragon Age Inquisition, or Minecraft), I watch a lot of Rooster Teeth and Achievement Hunter, and occasionally I make blankets and washcloths when I get so stressed that I can’t function.

11) Do you have pets?

YES. Okay, so I have Boo, who actually might be my soulmate. I’ve never felt so close to an animal. He hopped in my car one day when I pulled into a parking lot, and I was like “Oh, okay, I have a cat now,” and he’s been mine ever since. In my defense, he was very, very skinny, declawed, and more than likely abandoned. I call him Seizure Cat sometimes because he always seems to know when I’m about to seize, and he’ll climb on me and purr so that I don’t wake up alone. It really helps. 

Then I have Piper, who is my princess. She is 16-17, and to be frank, I stole her. I say I rescued her, but essentially, I stole her. I saw my friend’s dad kick her hard enough she bounced off a wall, and when it was time to go, I just picked her up and took her with me. For a long time, I was the only person she would let near her. She’s mellowed out quite a bit, hangs out mostly in her basket next to the food bowl, and yells when she wants attention - if you try to pet her before she wants it, she gets super angry. So affection is always on her terms!

Last but not least is actually my parents’ dog, Kobe. He is a massive German Shepherd/Treeing Walker Hound mix that we got from a pound in St. Louis. Brought him home at 8 pounds, found out he had distemper (he was the only of his litter to survive it), and 95 pounds and roughly three years later, he sleeps at the end of my bed (or couch when I can’t sleep in the bed). He is insanely smart - he’s officially smart enough that he knows all the commands he’s supposed to, can understand sentences and respond to them. He just doesn’t listen, because he pretty much knows he doesn’t have to. Luckily he’s an only dog, and my parents and I adore him, because he’s pretty much untrainable, simply because he’s so damn stubborn.

12) What sport do you play/have you played?

I can tell you that there is not a single person in this world who has ever looked at me and said “oh yeah, she’s sporty.”

I broke my wrist in a junior high kickball game. I wasn’t even playing. I was walking around the gym, talking with my hands with my friend @artsake-dreams and someone kicked the ball. It was hard enough that it flew across the gym, bounced off my hand, and snapped my wrist. The gym teacher didn’t believe I was hurt, the substitute nurse thought I was faking, so I walked to the office and cried to the secretary (who was my mom’s friend, mom is a teacher in the same district). Mom brought the x-rays in and very quietly and intensely not-yelled at the nurse and the gym teacher.

Later, in senior year, I got banned from playing hockey in the gym because I was too aggressive and almost got a detention for swearing. The only reason I didn’t was because the PE teacher was honestly just glad I was showing an interest in something physical.

13) How tall are you?

5’3

14) Favourite subject at school?

English/Writing. I also really enjoyed the sciences, even if I wasn’t good at the math. I was excellent when it came to the theories, but the formulas were really difficult for me. I also really love philosophy.

15) Dream job

I want to say writer, but that’s a lie because I don’t like people giving me deadlines for writing. I think an editor with a publisher is my dream job. Possibly a college-level writing/English/literature teacher. I’m one of those people who believes that writing is a skill that can be taught (though some are born with an innate talent) and that it’s something that should be taught. But that’s a post for another day.

Uh, okay, tagging some people? @artsake-dreams @sophaoat @thepeacering @icarusthriving UUUH it’s 2 am I don’t know 15 people off the top of my head, sorry, BUT if you see this you’re welcome to do it and say I tagged you!!!

[studioforonda]

Fun & Awkward with Natalie Leroux

Designer & Illustrator

www.studioeightyseven.com

Natalie Leroux is the creative behind Studio Eighty Seven, a design studio located in Grafton, MA helping small businesses and entrepreneurs develop their brand and marketing.

Recently, we got a chance to interview Natalie about her work and her line of greeting cards aptly named “Fun & Awkward”.

Where were you brought up? 

I was born in Massachusetts but moved to upstate New York when I was young.

Where did you get your formal art education and what was the most influential thing about it?

When I graduated from High School I wasn’t ready to give up athletics and go to art school. Instead, I went to the University of Rochester where I played field hockey for a year, and studied studio art and art history. During my Sophomore year at the University of Rochester, I entered a program called  Art NY - which was like a study abroad program in NYC. Myself, and a small group of UR students had internships, and took two classes with a UR professor.   After interviewing with small marketing firms and big publishing houses, I accepted a position with a commercial photographer. The experience at the internship, and the advice and friendship from the studio manager, a graduate of Rochester Institute of Technology, I realized I was not getting the type of technical training at  the University of Rochester that I was looking for. As luck would have it, one of the best graphic design schools in the country, RIT,  was right down the road from the  University of Rochester, making for an easy transition. . Looking at the descriptions for graphic design courses and typography at RIT convinced me to focus on graphic design. RIT was an amazing school. They really prepared me and other graduates for the real world in art and design.

How did you break into designing in Boston?

With extended family and friends in Massachusetts, moving  to Boston  after graduation  was easy. It took awhile for me to land  a job in Boston. But I got involved with the local AIGA chapter, and volunteered for events. I also got involved with Design Museum Boston. Overall, the  the design community in Boston was welcoming.

I eventually landed a job as an entry level designer at a small, niche advertising agency. The hours were long, but I was eager to prove myself. I stayed with the agency for 6 years, and by the time I left I was the Creative Director managing some of Boston’s best young designers.  My personality is one of a leader, and being a young impressionable manager I found it more challenging than I expected to balance the needs of the individual talent on the team, and the business demands of a growing agency. I left the agency in October of 2016 to pursue my own creative and business endeavors.

What are your artistic influences?

In the past I would say I was heavily influenced by Pop Art. I had a 8’ x 10’ poste rof a Roy Lichtenstein piece on my wall in college. I was really drawn to the contextual history during that time, and the combination of  type and image interested me. Now, I find myself inspired by ephemera. Since I was young I spent a lot of time in antique stores and was always drawn to the  boxes of old ticket stubs, postcards, and play bills.

Recently, I was working on a wedding invitation suite, and was checking out vintage baseball cards and ticket stubs for inspiration.I love the 1960′s self published zines, and am drawn to  1970′s design, typography, and illustration.

Recently, I am finding inspiring artists and designers from Australia and New Zealand on Instagram.

What are your thoughts on DESIGN?

I find that a lot of small business owners have a vague understanding what branding is, and why it’s important, but have a hard time coming to terms with the value of a professional. It can be frustrating trying to compete with internet sites that offer cheap alternatives to thoughtful, conceptual design solutions. I spend a lot of  time educating clients and communicating the value of what I, and other professionals, have to offer.

Unlike household brands, small businesses have flexibility to shake up their brands visually. With a lot of small businesses living solely online, it’s easier to erase what is there and start over. The screen can be ephemeral. 

What are your thoughts about Illustration?

I didn’t consider myself an illustrator  for a long time because I thought I wasn’t trained, or didn’t seem “good enough”. . Once I got out of my own head a bit, I got less precious about my illustrations.  Most of my illustration work is created for the Fun & Awkward greeting card line. The style fits this brand. I am being myself. The illustrations and greeting cards fit the vision I want, and I’m trying to make them cohesive for  wholesale opportunities.

When did you start your company?

November of 2016.

How did you get involved with Greeting Card Design?

I started in 2010. I was single and unemployed in Boston. It was an outlet for all the awkwardness of that time. I started putting them on Etsy. Just a handful of cards, about five of them.  When I started Studio Eighty Seven, it provided an opportunity to expand. . Someday soon I hope to have them in more retail shops around New England.  

What are your hobbies and interests?

I am an active person. I ran a couple of half marathons. I practice yoga. I like to spend time outside no matter the season. My backyard has become my favorite gym - spreading mulch and ripping out weeds and other unwanted plants is a great workout. . As a family, we love to explore New England. It’s not unusual for us to wake up on a Saturday morning and decide to take a 2 hour drive somewhere. 

What are your future goals?

Short Term, I’d love to get son in daycare one more day a week :) I’m pretty much there! There is a shop in Portsmouth that does wedding invitations and retail. Long term, I would love to have retail shop, and continue to do branding and marketing in the back for small businesses. My husband and I have also talked at length at owning and managing a wedding venue.

Who are your biggest fans?

My Mom, of course!  There are also a handful of local women who have been really supportive of me and my card line.  The local owner of a dog barkery and boutique, Quite Fetching, has been wonderful to me. We collaborate on card concepts, and they are sold at her shop.  I am also fortunate to call all my clients, past and present, fans of my work and business.

My Husband has said about me, “I want to hitch that wagon to her star!”

[71tenseventeen]

Shelter-(20)

Here it is. I hope I did them justice.

Next chapter will be an Epilogue.  

Geno calls several times a day for the first two weeks.

Sidney never answers but he cries every time it rings.

By the time a month has passed, the calls have tapered down to once a day.

It hurts.  Sidney knew it would.  He did this for a reason.

Everytime he reaches for the phone, he reminds himself of that.

–

Sidney lands a job doing janitorial work at the rink.  The hours are more regular than at the diner and he gets paid a little bit more.

Then Taylor gets the flu and a double ear infection. Sidney misses too many days during his probationary period and gets fired.

He gets fired from the grocery store when he oversleeps after staying up for most of three nights in a row with a teething Taylor.

He eventually gets hired back on at the diner.  

He tries hard not to think about how much Mom would hate that.  Taylor has to be taken care of.  

There’s no one else left to do it.

–

Geno tries to call four times on Sidney’s birthday.  He’s the only person who remembers.

–

In August Sidney hides all the mail he ever got from University of Pittsburgh in a box in the closet so he can try to forget about it.

Some days he thinks it’s close to working.

–

By September, Geno’s only calling once a week.

–

At the beginning of October Sidney splurges on a $5 costume for Taylor at the thrift store.  He wants to take her trick-or-treating this year like Mom always did with him.

The next day the car blows a tire.

The first Pens game of the regular season is a couple of days later but Sidney pawned the TV to help pay for a new tire so he doesn’t have to worry about accidentally seeing Geno on TV.

There’s no money left for Thanksgiving dinner but he buys a pack of sliced turkey.  He and Taylor have sandwiches and peas.

–

Sidney takes Taylor trick or treating and can’t stand the sympathetic looks he gets from every single neighbor’s house they go to.

He lets her eat too much candy and she gets sick all over him in the middle of the night.

–

Geno doesn’t call at all in November.

Sidney puts away all the pictures and reminders of Geno that he can find.

He takes off the necklace and tucks it away with the ring.

He wishes he didn’t still cry every day. He wishes it didn’t hurt so much.

–

Sidney can’t bring himself to set up the tree and lights in December.  There’s no money for presents and even if there was, no one’s around to give them any anyhow.

–

A few days before Christmas a box arrives. It’s from Geno.

It contains a wrapped box for Taylor and a sealed card for Sidney.  He swallows his pride and opens the box with Taylor.  There are several warm outfits, a couple of hats and some toys for her.  

Sidney is so sick of crying.

He tucks the card away in a book without opening it.

–

On New Year’s Eve Sidney cuts up a bag of newspaper confetti.  Taylor falls asleep by nine. Sidney throws the bag of confetti in the trash and goes to bed.

–

In early January a car pulls into the drive. Sidney instinctively knows who it is.

He wonders when he got released.

He meets Troy at the door.  “What do you want?”

Troy frowns.  “Trina at work?”

Sidney feels like he’s been punched but he lets out a huff of laughter.  “No.”

“Look, Sidney, I’m really not in the mood for-”

Sidney cuts him off by shoving a copy of Trina’s funeral program into his hands. Troy looks back and forth between it and Sidney a few times before he finally reads the text and looks up, shocked. “Is this a joke?”

“Fuck you.”  Sidney makes to shut the door but Troy stops it with an outstretched arm.

“Sidney, I didn’t know.” To his credit, Troy looks completely dumbfounded.

“Well now you do.”

“What happened?”

“That’s none of your business.”

Troy furrows his brow. “What do you mean, none of my business?  She was my-”

Sidney cuts him off again. “What? She was your what?  Not your wife—you divorced her and left us when I was a baby.”

“You don’t know anything about what happened between us.”

Sidney shakes his head. “It should have been you.”

Troy freezes. “What did you say?”

“I said it should have been you.” Sidney glares hard at Troy and fights tearing up with every fiber of his being.

Troy looks like he’d like to say any number of things, none of them particularly nice, but in the end he just sets his jaw and shakes his head before he walks away.

–

Bye week is coming up again.  Sidney knows because he hears rumblings, people speculating whether Geno will spend it in town again. Every customer he waits on seems to know that Sidney and Geno were best friends and he’s constantly being asked how Geno is doing, if Sidney will visit him in Pittsburgh sometime, if Sidney can get them an autograph.  

Sidney is so tired.

–

Geno comes into the diner and, of course, sits in Sidney’s section.  

Sidney can’t ask someone else to take the table—they would know something’s up so he takes a deep breath and goes.  “Hey.  Specials today are Patty Melt with Onion rings, Turkey wrap with steamed veggies and Chicken Pot Pie.”

“Sid.”

“$6.99 a plate for the specials.”

“Sidney.”

“We also have peach pie and banana pudding on the dessert menu today.”

“Sid.”

Sidney takes a deep breath.  “What, Geno?”

“We not together so you act like you not even know me?”

“It’s not…that’s not what I’m doing.”

“Seem like it to me.”

Sidney sighs. “Why are you here?”

“I call and call, you never answer. I think maybe I go to house, you not answer door so I come here.”

Sidney feels his cheeks flush because, honestly, Geno is probably right about that. “Geno, I have to work. I can’t—I can’t just stand here and talk to you.”

“Fine. Patty Melt, no onions. Curly fries instead of onion rings.  Two sides of macaroni and cheese, order of poutine and side of baked beans with bacon.  Strawberry Lemonade and two glasses water.”

Sidney looks at him incredulously.

“Play hockey, Sid! Middle of season, always hungry,” Geno says, sounding a little defensive.

“Okay.  I’ll be right back with your drinks.”

“Sid, wait.”

Here it comes, Sidney thinks, and braces himself for what Geno has to say next.

“Diner still have honey butter?”

That isn’t what he was expecting. “Uhh, yeah?”

Geno nods. “Add basket of rolls and honey butter.”

“Okay, Geno.”

He’s hit with a split second of intense fondness before reality intrudes and he remembers Geno isn’t his anymore.

Sidney wonders if it will always hurt this much.

Each time he goes to the table, Sidney braces himself for whatever Geno wants to say to him but Geno eats (and eats and eats) and then orders and eats dessert (two slices of peach pie) and he still hasn’t said anything.  

When Sidney brings his check over Geno finally touches his wrist gently and looks up at Sidney, eyes full of hope.  “Family leave early this morning for trip to Russia.  You think about come over tonight? We talk?”

“You know I can’t do that, Geno.”

Geno sighs and gives Sidney a sad smile. “Okay. I leave tomorrow at six for airport if you change mind.”

“Geno…” Sidney’s heart hurts.

Geno stands and looks down at Sidney with sad eyes. “Doesn’t matter if today, tomorrow, a year, ten years from now, Sid.  Will always be here when you ready.”

Sidney watches him leave the diner and then looks down at the table. There’s a (huge) tip and an envelope that just says “Sid” and “Please read” on it.  Sidney swallows down the lump in his throat as he stuffs it all in his pockets.

–

Becky’s late for her overnight shift and Sidney has to work over until she gets there so it’s late when he finally gets home and retrieves a sleeping Taylor from Dorothy next door. He eases her into her crib and wants nothing more than to faceplant in bed himself but Geno’s envelope has been burning a hole in his brain all night.

He makes himself shower first before he settles on his bed and turns it over in his hands. It’s crinkled and bent where Sidney had to fold it in half to fit into his pocket. It’s not overly thick but Sidney can tell there’s probably a handful of pieces of paper in it.

He takes a deep breath and opens it.

The first thing is a pamphlet from University of Pittsburgh with the words “Student Parents” and pictures of what are apparently students with their small children on the front.  Geno has highlighted various things in the pamphlet like the section on campus daycare facilities, online classes and other resources available to students who have small children.  There are a couple of notes written in Geno’s messy scrawl.  Things like, “Offer at least 7 class for your major online,” and “Meet with teachers of one year old babies and they answer all my question but maybe you have more. Question on yellow paper.”  

Sidney shuffles the papers and plucks out a slightly crumpled paper torn from a legal pad.  On it there are—Sidney’s eyes go a little wide.  There are twenty seven questions listed out and notes all over the paper about the answers Geno got to those questions.  Things like “bring own diapers,” and “can bring own food or eat daycare food,” and “good security.”  

Sidney swallows hard and puts the pamphlet and papers aside.

The next is a printout from the University website about their student parent housing options with a note scrawled across the top.  “For if Sidney want to live on own with Taylor.”

After that is a long list that Geno has compiled of activities, book stores and places to go with toddlers in Pittsburgh.

The fifth and final piece of paper is information about internships with the Pens for physical trainers.  The note at the top says, “I talk to trainers and they say they give bigger chance for friend of player.” On the bottom of the paper, Geno has written, “Sid-Whether you be with me or not, want you to follow dreams.  Love, Geno.”

Sidney drops his head into his hands and cries for a long time.

Eventually he gathers up the papers and tucks the envelope carefully into his nightstand.  While the drawer is open, his eyes fall on the little box that he keeps the necklace and ring in.  He pulls it out and runs his fingers over it, leaning back against the headboard.  He spends a lot of time thinking before he can finally drift off to sleep.

He jerks awake sometime in the early morning hours and looks at the clock.  It’s just a couple minutes after five.  Sidney is laying there wondering why he woke up when he realizes it’s really cold in his room.

He throws on some socks and a hoodie and checks to be sure there isn’t somehow a window open and then goes to check the thermostat.  It’s set at 72* but the inside temperature is only 52.

“Fuck!”

He dashes to the closet where the heating unit is and yanks open the door.  It only takes him a minute to figure out that it’s not on and it’s not going to turn back on.  It’s -8 outside and the heat just went out.  Sidney doesn’t have a dime to fix it.  

He sinks to the floor and drops his head on his knees, crying for the second time in 6 hours, feeling crushed by the weight of everything that’s happened. It’s below freezing outside and they don’t have heat.  The car has been making a strange noise for the last week and their microwave quit working a month ago. This is it, he thinks. This is what I have to look forward to.  

He’ll always have something horrible to struggle with—broken down cars, blown tires,  broken heating systems and he will never have enough money to deal with it it.  He’ll never make enough to take care of Taylor the way she deserves.  He’ll always be living with the fear of Troy showing up again.  He’ll always be alone, will never be able to look at someone else without thinking of Geno.  

Geno who loves him so much that he went and interviewed teachers to see if they were worthy of Taylor.  Geno who loves him so much he gathered all of this information and wanted Sidney to have it even if he decided not to be with Geno.

Sidney gasps out a sob because of everything that’s crashing down on him, that’s the worst.  He loves Geno and Geno loves him and he pushed him away.  In that moment he knows it’s the biggest mistake he’s ever made, knows that he doesn’t have to do this alone— he never had to He’d been so stupid that he let the only person in the world that he’s ever been able to truly count on go.  In less than an hour he’ll be leaving again for Pittsburgh and—

Sidney jumps up.

There’s still time.

The call goes straight to voicemail.  Geno’s phone isn’t on.

He crams his feet into shoes before running to gently pull Taylor out of her crib.  “I’m so sorry, Tay.  We have to go.  We need to go see Geno, okay?”  

He dresses her in layers and then puts her snowsuit and hat on over all of it.  She’s not thrilled.

He yanks on his own hat, gloves and coat and then grabs a fleece blanket for Taylor for good measure before hustling out to the car.

It doesn’t start.

Sidney tries and tries but it just makes a clicking sound and he bites back his tears as he pulls an increasingly cranky Taylor out of her carseat and bundles the blanket over her in his arms.  It’s just three blocks, they can make it.  He’ll run if he has to.  

He gets there at 5:48 but there’s no car in the driveway and his heart sinks.  He rings the bell.  When no one answers he rings it again.  And again.  By the third time he knows no one will answer.  He waited too long.

Geno is gone.

It takes him longer to trudge home but he tries to keep a quick pace, if for no other reason than to get Taylor out of the cold, not that it’s much warmer in their house. He wonders what will happen to them if he can’t figure out a way to fix the heat. Probably nothing good.

Tears track down his cheeks as he apologizes softly to her while he carries her home. “I’m so sorry, Taylor.  I’m so sorry. I was too late. I messed up and I was too late.  He loves us and he would have taken care of us.  We would have been a family and I blew it.”

Sidney is devastated.

He turns the corner onto their street and freezes when he looks up.

There’s a car parked behind his in the driveway.

Geno.

Sidney runs the rest of the way, despite Taylor’s protests and bounds up onto the porch where his front door is hanging open. “Geno?”

Geno dashes out of the hallway to the front door. “Sid!  Where you go? I come here, think try one last time and your front door open, car door open.  Can’t find you.  You and Taylor gone and I’m so scared!”  He moves close and grips Sidney’s cheeks. Sidney doesn’t pull away.

“Sid what wrong? What happen? Why you out in cold with Taylor? Why you cry?”  Geno looks so shaken and Sidney doesn’t know how he ever could have pushed him away.

His lip quivers as he speaks. “You said you were leaving at six and I just, I wanted to see if…if it’s not too late…”

Geno’s eyes open a little wider.  “You mean, Sid? You want?”

Tears are spilling over again as Sidney nods and rasps out, “I’m so sorry, Geno.  I love you. I miss you so much.  You are the best person I’ve ever known and I’ve been so stupid.”

“Oh Sid.  I tell you already. Never too late.” And then Geno kisses him and the weight of the world is gone from Sidney’s shoulders.

A few hours later, the three of them board a plane to Pittsburgh.

[bentuhoekenobi]

REFLECTIONS ON WORKING FROM HOME PT1: TWO OPPOSING REVELATIONS

I'm still learning a lot about distance working (Building Ori and the Will of the Wisps with 80 People Working from Home).

I HAVE GOOD INTERPERSONAL SKILLS

I want to, and probably already do, believe that distance-working can work. But I took a trip down to Auckland last week and got more curation work done in half an hour of networking then I did through a week of emailing.

I know it probably goes without saying, but in the interest of creating a genuine discussion (not just an echo chamber for an agenda - that I share too):

there are certain activities that are definitely much easier to do in high density environments and,

there are also some interpersonal skills, that unfortunately I have, that aren't as powerful without face-to-face contact.

I happened to be in a situation where both of those criteria were met and if those - more introverted people - hadn't come out to the networking event I would never have connected them to the opportunity. 

My first revelation occurred when I thought "To get more games for this event in April I'll need to do an announcement at AKL Indies." but when I did the announcement I got ZERO bites. So I put on that winning smile and suit of infectious exuberance and "worked the room". In half an hour I had almost 10 leads and locked in all the games over the next few days. It’s hard to attribute concrete results to amorphous activities, but this is partly what I was being hired for. I took that for granted until that night. 

ORGANIZED ITINERARY ACHIEVED #FEELSGOODDUDE

At a more-meta-level, I ended the trip with the overwhelming feeling that working from Ruakaka can, and might just, work. I managed to line up multiple meetings and even a paid open-mic hosting gig, and - that very same night - had an unforgettable night jamming with some old friends. This was revelation number two. It takes about 2-3 hours of work spread over a couple of weeks to line everything up like this, which I hope to get down a bit with practice, but it’s worth it for the amount of work I managed to churn through in a very short time.

JUGGLING BEING DAYCARE ALSO

Then, two days ago, my partner went back to work and I looked after little one-and-a-half for the day. I was running on about 20% efficiency all day and wasn’t able to get in to a flow state with any long tasks (when I put them down I did housework instead of work work) but it was still a relatively productive day. A lot of my time was spent setting up my office so I can look after 1.5 without them destroying anything or harming themselves.

SPATIAL DESIGN FOR GENERAL GOODNESS

I also managed to rethink my workspace to increase the amount of music I can weave in to down time while not loosing a place to paper prototype.

That, coupled with my Repertoire (working title) practice cards have been far more effective that I ever thought has added to my positivity.

I DON’T MONEY

I also just got paid for my first big contract taking some of the pressure off mortgage and bill payments. Now my biggest concern is accounting. Dealing with tax, paying other contractors. I am completely lost in that department and I don’t have enough income just yet to pay an accountant. 

HEALTHY LIVING HABITS

I’m also graaaaaaaaaadually, getting in to the flow of physically and mentally healthier living habits: more sleep, better eating, food prep, serving my family etc. No real exercise yet but hockey is about to start up again and I can’t wait. I don’t even care that we are in the worst team in the competition. I just love playing. So there’s something to look forward to. 

Also TOOL was profoundly amazing. I think seeing them is part of the reason I have so much motivation right now.

BROADCASTING

The unpublished podcast I started with my friends seems to have been a hit with those involved and desire to do another one is high. This may also potentially splinter off in to another podcast opportunity.

I’ve also started using OBS to test out some broadcast techniques. I’m still very amateur but I’ve been using it to:

discuss projects: recording video analyses on existing products to share with team mates,

teaching my daughter reading and math: using video games with an added layer based on her school curriculum and me walking through them with her (this will need several of it’s own posts to explain)

Setting up my musical equipment I’ve taking one step closer to confirming my suspicion that the first piece of new equipment I’m going to need to buy is a cheap mixer. My levels are all over the place.

OTHER PROJECTS

My role-playing game for kids companion project, We Make Camp (working title), had taken a back seat for a few weeks but I’m meeting my ‘player’ test subjects again this weekend and I’m going to hopefully do some body-storming with their father to start working on the GM testing regime.

The geo-loc game for ARA Journey’s has officially started. I’ll be working on that a lot today.

My work with HeiHei is pretty much over. Just some loose ends to tie up.

I have to quote a workshop today. Although I don’t want to teach anymore, it’s a workshop that A: I can do in my sleep and B: probably my favourite workshop out of all those I’ve ever run. So we’ll see how that goes.

CONCLUSION

There are obviously countless other factors I could discuss regarding my first month working from home, and ultimately this is really a journal for my own thoughts, but this feels like a good place to stop.

[atombail7-blog]

Family Friday (vol. 90): Hawaii Dreaming in the Frozen Tundra

It’s late Friday afternoon and I’ve had a highly productive day. The kids have been engrossed in making valentines and are showing no signs of stir craziness. They must realize it is SO FREAKING COLD outside. I’ve never seen a dog do her business quite so quickly – it’s rather impressive, actually. Next Wednesday is a HIGH of -1. WHAT IS THAT?! My tennis coach said that these temperatures are record-breaking low. Ugh. I also learned that schools are cancelled if temperatures are -15 with wind chill and so I’m bracing myself for the morning scramble of what to do with my kids when daycare closes. It happened Monday of this week due to pipes freezing and it happened on Wednesday due to snow. I should have found a daycare that prorates tuition in such instances…

After I ruined Mark’s surprise of returning from India a day early, we arranged for a babysitter last Saturday and went to a brewery and out for dinner. Except, I had started feeling pretty crappy. I had stomach cramps and nausea. It was very bizarre. When the symptoms worsened on Sunday and I slept much of the day before skipping my hockey game and eating next to nothing, I knew something was up – I don’t miss meals. On Monday, I made an appointment with my PCP, convinced it was appendicitis or something. She ruled that out but said it was either a viral bug or my gallbladder. I went back to work, ate a bit for lunch, and experienced radiating pain between my shoulder blades. I sent my PCP a quick note and she ordered an abdominal ultrasound. My symptoms continued but by Wednesday morning when the ultrasound was scheduled, I had started feeling a bit better. I moved forward and got negative results from the ultrasound on Thursday. Come today, I’m feeling nearly back to 100%. Guess it was something viral…but I think I had a little gallbladder issue sprinkled in there, too. It wouldn’t be the first time. So, $600 later, I had a viral something and a week of no cooking (until last night), little eating, and little exercise. Glad to be back on my feet especially since Mark is suffering from yet another man cold.

In the evenings, we’ve been starting to plan our trip to Maui. Thanks for all the recommendations so far! I’m getting SO excited! We are typically not ones to plan out a full itinerary, but Hawaii is so dang expensive, we want to be sure we get to do and see all that we can while we’re there. With scheduled pool and beach time, too! Some of the restaurants in Maui look absolutely incredible and just looking at pictures online of traditional luaus makes me want to hop on a plane….yesterday.

We have no plans this weekend. Gina and I are recording a podcast episode tomorrow morning and we’ve got a date night planned on Saturday. Otherwise, hockey, TV, hockey, Peloton, and church before it’s back to the grind. I’ll soak up some cuddles with my girlfriends because lately, I feel like I no longer have babies. I have 2 little girls that are 2 going on 20 and 4 going on 14. I’m not sure which is worse. Lately, the nanny and Mark have been telling me that if I ignore the kids they’re better behaved. Currently, they’re playing in the bathroom, lights off, with a flashlight. Before that, they entertained themselves with a couple of baby blankets on the floor for a solid hour. There may be some truth to this whole hands-off parenting business. 😉

I’m going to Seattle next week to help my sister-in-law shop for wedding dresses! Can’t wait! It will be a nice little break and it certainly isn’t any colder there. She’s going to be a beautiful bride and I am both anxious and curious to see what she picks out for her big day!

My niece, Ava, is still in the NICU. She’s 8 days old and it is now assumed that she was born closer to 35 weeks and not 38 weeks as originally thought. She has been getting caffeine to help get her a bit more alert and interested in eating. She still has a feeding tube but is off oxygen so that’s wonderful news. I am yet to meet her – grandparents only are allowed in the NICU. I get it, but I can’t wait to snuggle that angel baby. She has the most beautiful features and that Filipino skin is gorgeous! Maybe this week if I can swing it before Seattle – fingers crossed!

I’m heading to drop-in hockey in a bit after coming up empty for happy hour goers. Exercise is probably a better choice, especially after several days without exercise on account of illness. Afterwards I’ll probably cuddle up with the TV remote and try to get caught up with the Australian Open…unless Mark wants to binge on one of our shows: Shameless, 90 Day Fiance, or Married at First Sight. I tell ya, we have excellent taste in programming.

Stay warm and happy weekend!

Be well,

Source: https://preventionrd.com/2019/01/family-friday-vol-90-hawaii-dreaming-in-the-frozen-tundra/

[codsilk80-blog]

Family Friday (vol. 90): Hawaii Dreaming in the Frozen Tundra

It’s late Friday afternoon and I’ve had a highly productive day. The kids have been engrossed in making valentines and are showing no signs of stir craziness. They must realize it is SO FREAKING COLD outside. I’ve never seen a dog do her business quite so quickly – it’s rather impressive, actually. Next Wednesday is a HIGH of -1. WHAT IS THAT?! My tennis coach said that these temperatures are record-breaking low. Ugh. I also learned that schools are cancelled if temperatures are -15 with wind chill and so I’m bracing myself for the morning scramble of what to do with my kids when daycare closes. It happened Monday of this week due to pipes freezing and it happened on Wednesday due to snow. I should have found a daycare that prorates tuition in such instances…

After I ruined Mark’s surprise of returning from India a day early, we arranged for a babysitter last Saturday and went to a brewery and out for dinner. Except, I had started feeling pretty crappy. I had stomach cramps and nausea. It was very bizarre. When the symptoms worsened on Sunday and I slept much of the day before skipping my hockey game and eating next to nothing, I knew something was up – I don’t miss meals. On Monday, I made an appointment with my PCP, convinced it was appendicitis or something. She ruled that out but said it was either a viral bug or my gallbladder. I went back to work, ate a bit for lunch, and experienced radiating pain between my shoulder blades. I sent my PCP a quick note and she ordered an abdominal ultrasound. My symptoms continued but by Wednesday morning when the ultrasound was scheduled, I had started feeling a bit better. I moved forward and got negative results from the ultrasound on Thursday. Come today, I’m feeling nearly back to 100%. Guess it was something viral…but I think I had a little gallbladder issue sprinkled in there, too. It wouldn’t be the first time. So, $600 later, I had a viral something and a week of no cooking (until last night), little eating, and little exercise. Glad to be back on my feet especially since Mark is suffering from yet another man cold.

In the evenings, we’ve been starting to plan our trip to Maui. Thanks for all the recommendations so far! I’m getting SO excited! We are typically not ones to plan out a full itinerary, but Hawaii is so dang expensive, we want to be sure we get to do and see all that we can while we’re there. With scheduled pool and beach time, too! Some of the restaurants in Maui look absolutely incredible and just looking at pictures online of traditional luaus makes me want to hop on a plane….yesterday.

We have no plans this weekend. Gina and I are recording a podcast episode tomorrow morning and we’ve got a date night planned on Saturday. Otherwise, hockey, TV, hockey, Peloton, and church before it’s back to the grind. I’ll soak up some cuddles with my girlfriends because lately, I feel like I no longer have babies. I have 2 little girls that are 2 going on 20 and 4 going on 14. I’m not sure which is worse. Lately, the nanny and Mark have been telling me that if I ignore the kids they’re better behaved. Currently, they’re playing in the bathroom, lights off, with a flashlight. Before that, they entertained themselves with a couple of baby blankets on the floor for a solid hour. There may be some truth to this whole hands-off parenting business. 😉

I’m going to Seattle next week to help my sister-in-law shop for wedding dresses! Can’t wait! It will be a nice little break and it certainly isn’t any colder there. She’s going to be a beautiful bride and I am both anxious and curious to see what she picks out for her big day!

My niece, Ava, is still in the NICU. She’s 8 days old and it is now assumed that she was born closer to 35 weeks and not 38 weeks as originally thought. She has been getting caffeine to help get her a bit more alert and interested in eating. She still has a feeding tube but is off oxygen so that’s wonderful news. I am yet to meet her – grandparents only are allowed in the NICU. I get it, but I can’t wait to snuggle that angel baby. She has the most beautiful features and that Filipino skin is gorgeous! Maybe this week if I can swing it before Seattle – fingers crossed!

I’m heading to drop-in hockey in a bit after coming up empty for happy hour goers. Exercise is probably a better choice, especially after several days without exercise on account of illness. Afterwards I’ll probably cuddle up with the TV remote and try to get caught up with the Australian Open…unless Mark wants to binge on one of our shows: Shameless, 90 Day Fiance, or Married at First Sight. I tell ya, we have excellent taste in programming.

Stay warm and happy weekend!

Be well,

Source: https://preventionrd.com/2019/01/family-friday-vol-90-hawaii-dreaming-in-the-frozen-tundra/

[garden-of-succulents]

330. Sleeping together (platonic) or 214. "Made this for you" for Zimbits Single Dad AU - also, will you ever tell us how Bitty ended up with his trio?

Okay okay I may get some of the details wrong here, but long story short with Bitty and the kids--

Bitty fathered Dex.  He was working in Georgia as an adult, trying to sell cookbooks about Southern food and make his family happy, and... well... he tried taking his image of Yes I Am Definitely Not Gay a little too far and the woman in question (a high school friend) ended up pregnant. She had religious objections to abortion, but wasn’t really in love with Bitty and just about to graduate college and get a good job in finance, so Bitty agreed to take custody of Will. Conveniently, he got a job with a cooking show in Providence at the time, so he could move away from family pressure to make a relationship work with Will’s mom. In the fallout he came out to his parents, who were much mollified by the existence of a grandchild.

He did have one family member in Providence: A cousin with an one-year-old baby and a new pregnancy on the way, who was in the middle of getting divorced and married to someone new, and who could definitely use a family member around who wasn’t about to throw stones. Chris was her firstborn; Derek is only a few months younger than Will. She and Bitty ended up sharing babysitting a lot and the three kids grew up playing with each other.

Then when Chris was 4 and Will and Derek were 3, Bitty’s cousin and husband died in a car crash.  Bitty was the one who had to drive down to Chris and Derek’s daycare to pick them up when their parents didn’t show; he dazedly told them they were coming to his house for a sleepover, and then after dinner when some other sane adult showed up to back him up (and give him more information than “something happened to your cousin, you have to pick up her kids”) had to tell them their parents were dead.

So the thing was: Chris’s dad was still alive, and he or his parents might have taken Chris, though he’d only seen them two or three times a year. Derek’s grandparents, aunts and uncles knew and liked him, but were still only really willing to take Derek. And Bitty was in the middle going, “These brothers just lost their parents, you cannot split them up too.” Which meant that in the end the families were just like, “Okay, you do it,” and gave him money from their trust funds to do so.

So, yanno, it’s a little tough, and they have good days and bad days. Will is still furiously jealous of Bitty’s time and attention; for a long time Chris felt like treating Bitty as a dad-figure was betraying his “real” parents; Derek is a delicate artistic flower child Bitty’s really not sure he understands at all. (He asks Bitty to fast-forward through the “scary parts” of Cars.) 

Their nicknames are part of how they honour their parents. It makes a lot of things easier, especially with kids of a different race, if their last names are the same as his; but when they became “Bittle”s, Bitty made sure they weren’t losing who they were. So that means having pictures of their parents around, and hockey nicknames (and once Chowder and Nursey were established, of course Will wanted one too; his middle name, Poindexter, is his mother’s maiden name) and Skyping and vacations with all their different family members and things like that.

[gabriellakirtonblog]

The Fitness Industry Is Broken – A Story About Hope

Nobody could have predicted how it would happen.

Nobody saw the coronavirus pandemic shutting down the gyms and throwing tens of thousands of fitness professionals out of work.

But everybody knew something was wrong.

I saw it back in 2008, when I strained my hamstring playing hockey, and was forced off my feet for two weeks. I’d been a personal trainer for four years, working at a top gym with a full schedule. But in the fitness industry, if you can’t work, you don’t get paid.

If something as mundane as a hamstring injury could affect my income so drastically, how could personal training be a viable career? How can you bet on a business where success is contingent on nothing going wrong, when so many things can go wrong?

We’re good at building unbreakable bodies, but not unbreakable careers.

The strongest trainers in the gym are often powerless at work, subject to the whims of their clients and employers.

If anything keeps you or your clients out of the gym—from a family emergency to a global pandemic—you’re out of luck.

How could such a brittle business model survive?

The model was broken for trainers, clients, and gym owners

It’s not just the trainers who get hurt by this broken business model. It doesn’t work for clients or employers either.

Our job as trainers is to remove stress from our clients’ lives, not add to it.

And yet, we sell our services in strict blocks of 60 minutes, no matter the needs or goals of the individual. Doesn’t matter if the client is a detrained novice who would be best served with a 20- or 30-minute workout, or someone with more ambitious performance or physique goals who needs longer sessions.

We fill the beginner’s time with stretching or treadmill walking, or dumb stuff like triceps pushdowns. (Admit it. You’ve done this. I have too.)

“But I can really feel it working . . .”

And for that more advanced client, the one who wants to build muscle or train for a sport, we try to cram 75 minutes’ worth of training into that predetermined one-hour session.

We cut rest breaks too short, and turn strength or hypertrophy work into metabolic conditioning. Yes, they work hard, but it’s still a suboptimal workout for their goals.

And the client had better show up on time, because they’re paying the trainer no matter what fraction of the service they receive.

Consider one of my favorite clients back in the day. (I trained clients in person from 2006 to 2012.) He was a doctor, the head of the emergency department at a major hospital.

Was it fair to tell him he must show up precisely at 6 p.m.? Or if he has to cancel at the last minute (because, you know, things happen in the emergency room), he gets charged anyway?

Now consider gym owners. If the model serves anyone, you’d think they’d be the ones to benefit.

But most new gyms and studios go out of business within a year or two. A person who has the passion to open a gym rarely has the capital, business knowledge, or management skill to keep it open.

Gym goers expect a big, bright space filled with expensive cardio and weight machines, but they don’t want to pay high membership fees. If you open your gym in a relatively affluent area, where people can afford those fees, you’ll pay a lot more per square foot. But you’ll also have a lot of competition, which drives prices down.

Personal training used to be an expensive misuse of talent …

… and it’s time for this to end

Another problem, for both trainers and gym owners, is the need to turn a service like personal training into a lucrative revenue stream. The pressure to sell more sessions leads to high turnover and low morale.

The best trainers work the longest hours, from early morning to late evening, since that’s when clients want to be trained. They burn out and leave, while trainers who aren’t as good at sales get pushed out.

It’s an unfortunate and expensive misuse of talent.

But there’s a better way, one where everybody wins. It’s called online training. You’ve probably heard about it. Unfortunately, there’s a serious lack of understanding as to how it fits into the story.

When there’s an online component the clients get a better service, trainers make more money with better hours, and gym owners multiply their profit per square foot.

I’ve promoted online training since 2013, and I launched the Online Trainer Academy, the world’s first certification program for remote coaching, in 2016.

Online training isn’t about sipping Mai Tais on the beach with your feet up. It’s about resiliency. Online training is about building a fitness business where everybody wins because it allows fitness to dictate business.

I believed that before COVID-19 turned everything upside down. If it hadn’t been a virus, it would’ve been something else. Disruption was inevitable before, and will be again.

That’s why it’s imperative for fitness professionals to build a robust business model that can not only withstand tough times, but thrive in them.

Perhaps the most telling part is that everybody knew this to be true.

A tale of a broken gym owner who failed to act

Case in point: Several months ago, my company was contacted by a gym owner with more than a dozen locations. He wanted us to build an online training operation for his gyms.

It was a smart choice. The new revenue stream, with almost 100 percent profit, would’ve given him a significant advantage over his competitors.

But he turned down our proposal, deciding instead to open another very expensive gym in an extremely competitive market. The new location cost about six times the amount we proposed to set up and oversee his online training business.

COVID-19 forced him to temporarily shut down his gyms and lay off hundreds of employees. Last I saw, he was complaining on social media about how unfair the situation is, and how the government had better compensate him for the lost revenue.

I don’t say that with any malice. I really hope he comes out of this all right, and his employees can get back to work.

The crazy part about this story is how close he came to making the right call.

He understood how valuable online training could be for his business.

He knew a small investment could generate big returns.

But instead of acting on his vision for the future, he doubled down on his past by opening that new location. And it broke him.

I’ll never know why he made that choice. But I can guess.

One choice represented change. It didn’t matter that it was a cheaper option, with more upside and less downside. Change is hard. It goes against all our instincts to do something new and different when things are going well. Even if you know something isn’t quite right, it’s difficult to recognize your areas of vulnerability.

The other choice, the one with more cost, more risk, and less potential upside, represented continuity. No change.

And for a while, it seemed to work. Things were humming along until COVID-19 exposed his vulnerability.

When preparation meets opportunity – Rhonda’s story

Consider another example:

When her first granddaughter was born with physical challenges, Rhonda Dougherty James’ family was faced with a dilemma: Her daughter needed to return to work to keep her health insurance. But she couldn’t put her baby in daycare because of her health problems.

The solution was for James to fly back to St. Louis every week to take care of her granddaughter, and then fly home for the weekends.

If she’d opened that gym like she’d originally planned, or if all her income came from training clients in person, she wouldn’t have been able to keep working while she commuted.

But because she trained clients online, she was able to work with them from wherever she happened to be. She wrote programs in airports and shot Facebook Live videos in her daughter’s spare bedroom, sometimes with a stack of Pampers boxes visible in the corner.

She did that for a year, and then rented an apartment in St. Louis for another year. Now that her granddaughter is healthy and thriving, she’s back in Florida full time.

There was no way James could’ve prepared for that specific situation. But that’s not the point. The point is that online training gave her the flexibility to step up when her family needed her most.

You can hear Rhonda tell the story in her own words here.

A story about hope

The fitness industry was long overdue for a course correction.

If it hadn’t been a pandemic, it would’ve been something else—something random and unexpected. And, like COVID-19, it would’ve been a catalytic event that exposed the vulnerabilities of our business model, forcing all of us to evolve.

It’s going to hurt. Good people with bad businesses will suffer. Some will come out better on the other end, but some won’t. That sucks.

But let’s be honest. Much of the fitness industry had been on cruise control for a long time.

It was bad, but not quite bad enough to force change. And this is why things were so broken.

Fortunately, we’re an industry that attracts strong people.

Not just physically strong, which is what we’re known for. We’re also strong-willed.

We persevere. That’s why we keep lifting while others watch Netflix.

We don’t complain when things hurt. We call it DOMS and celebrate it.

We thrive when we push ourselves outside our comfort zone.

What’s normal for us is too intense for most people.

Our industry is going to come out of this stronger and healthier. And our best people are going to thrive as a result.

Yes, it’s going to be difficult. Some businesses will shut down for good. The sudden loss of income will strain relationships, sometimes to the breaking point.

But it’s going to force everyone to stop gliding. To evolve. To change.

In the words of the esteemed Rocky Balboa:

“The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward.”

This pandemic is a wake-up call

During a time of quarantine and social distancing, online training is our only option. But it won’t be for long. When the gyms reopen, many trainers and gym owners will heed the lesson of COVID-19, and see online coaching as an essential part of their business.

Others will see the pandemic not just as a wake-up call, but as a sign that the industry is broken beyond repair, and it’s time to get out.

You know what? Both are fine, because both result in certainty. No more gliding along in a broken industry, complaining about how things should be, but not doing anything about it because things weren’t quite bad enough to force action.

The choice is yours: Will you step up, or step out?

The pandemic’s effects will be with us for a long time. Even after the threat recedes, it will take months, if not years, for people to return to their gyms en masse.

This kind of fear and discomfort doesn’t just go away. It’s going to be a long time before people shake hands and feel comfortable in crowds again.

I can’t say what the fitness industry will look like when things once again feel stable. But I guarantee it will never go back to how it was. There will be a new normal. And that’s okay, because the old normal was a broken fitness industry.

A lot of people will look back at this crazy time as the moment it all changed. I hope you’ll see it as a time when you were challenged in a way you could never have anticipated, but nonetheless rose to the challenge, levelled up, and evolved.

This is your chance to build a resilient and robust business. You’ve been forced to do what you’ve known you should have been doing all along: Add another income stream, one that allows you to make money while not having to be physically present.

Online training is what allows you to keep training clients when you’re stuck on the couch with a torn hamstring. Or when you have a family emergency that forces you to work from multiple locations, including airports and spare bedrooms. Or when the next crisis, whatever it is, makes all of us change the way we do business.

I, for one, am hopeful for what’s to come. I think it’s going to be beautiful. Because, after all, pressure makes diamonds.

And if you decide it’s time to start online training and learn the best model for delivery and sales, I wanted to now invite you to enroll in the Online Trainer Academy Certification.

We’ve just released Essentials, a more cost-effective version of our world-renowned certification course.

Regardless of whether or not you decide to join us, I hope you heed this call and step up. Our industry needs you now more than ever, and I can’t wait to see what happens.

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Family Friday (vol. 105): Holiday Hangover

It appeared like December dragged in some methods, and now January is flying by. I’m enjoying hockey all weekend, adopted by my niece’s first birthday subsequent weekend, adopted by an area beer fest the next weekend. All good issues! When the times are gray and you are feeling as for those who’ll by no means see the solar once more, it’s useful to have enjoyable occasions to sit up for. Mark just lately went on somewhat brewery hop in Indiana together with his buddy and their take-away was that our little nook of the world has distinctive craft beer. I most undoubtedly agree. Good factor so many of those occasions contain craft beer 😉

The ladies’ first week again to “school” (daycare) after 2 weeks off went significantly better than anticipated. Mark was off work a lot of that point and so I labored day-after-day besides Christmas Day and New Years Day. As I sort that, no surprise December dragged! Work was slooooow, however hey, at the very least I haven’t burned a bunch of paid break day simply to have laid round for just a few weeks. I tied up just a few huge tasks and as of yesterday, my Continuing Medical Education (CME) presentation on the the Impact of Nutrition on Health Outcomes is DONE…and went rather well. Both good issues. Public talking is just not one thing I hate (I’m bizarre, I do know), however chatting with physicians is a bit intimidating. They requested some difficult questions and I’ve acquired some follow-up to do, however I really like the engagement we obtained from these in attendance. Oh, and I used to be additionally on the native information on Tuesday morning. That was not deliberate, however was enjoyable!

Shea begins again in ice skating tomorrow morning and sadly, I’ll miss it. I sit up for seeing her progress subsequent weekend. After buying some hockey pants and gloves for her, she actually took off. I can relate – having some padding on makes me extra fearless on skates and that’s coming from somebody who has ice skated for the reason that age of three/four.

We had deliberate to have a spider angioma on Piper’s cheek eliminated, nevertheless, we have been instructed at a second session that because of the ache concerned, they recommend we wait. You can see it on the under image. It’s just a bit pink mark, however the dermatologists say it won’t go away by itself. She’s good simply the best way she is 🙂

The ladies proceed in dance (ballet/faucet) for Piper and gymnastics for Shea. Shea can also be enrolled in tennis and ice skating and Piper is expressing curiosity in tennis as quickly as she will (at four). It makes for a busy week, however our new afterschool nanny appears to be falling right into a groove with the ladies and routine. The ladies have most actually been testing their limits along with her and for her, that’s extremely irritating. It’s wonderful how intuitive youngsters are and so they can simply push, push, push!

For Christmas, I obtained a present I actually needed — glass meals storage to switch all of my plastic. It has been 2 weeks and my drawer remains to be organized and for me, that’s enormous.

My e book membership is watching the Amazon collection Modern Love in lieu of a e book this month. I’m having fun with it, however not in love with it. I’d advocate it, although – 30 minute episodes that don’t construct on each other, so you’ll be able to hop in whereever.

The podcast has been booming! That has been enjoyable to see. The CBD and Cannabis episode has been wildly widespread, as has the episode on Expectations and Control. We get fairly weak in a few of these chats and it’s rewarding to listen to from listeners and what they’re taking away from the present. Means lots. Be positive to test it out. 🙂

I can consider nothing else happening. BORING. January in Michigan, I inform ya. Maybe I would like to begin desirous about a trip vacation spot…one thing to get us by way of winter as a result of I KNOW that the worst is but to return. I imply, at this time is 50 out!

Hope everybody has an exquisite weekend!

Be effectively,

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