#i would like to talk about it more but i srsly cant keep my eyes open | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fuzzbuns · 5 years

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Im in a bad mood because american education system is hell so im gonna ramble about stuff no one cares about for that sweet serotonin aka atsutodo* tho really just Mr Atsushi... Sir Joned arbuck-

*?... like i mean its lowkey atsutodo i will not front but realistically speaking im just gonna talk about thier relationship and whether you see it as platonic or not it is up to you but like just know in my minds eye MY GOD these bitches GAY.... good for them tho... good for them

I just legit don’t understand people who either think/ characterize atsushi as someone who is mean or doesn’t like todomatsu. Like the only person who legitimately should ever feel that way is totty but we will get there. like, i get not everyone stans atsushi and has been following him ever since that one tweet after ep 22 where he is shown baking a totty themed meal (srsly look at this. the second i saw this tweet back in like 2016 i was like “oh i love this dude”)

LIKE.... LOOK AT THAT.......

Ok so back to the point : like i get most people do not care to keep up with the guy who had 19 seconds of screen time in ep 22 LIKE I GET THAT but literally the very second you look at his characterization in literally anything it is just so clear that he genuinely likes totty and seeks out his company!

And like i know some people saw how totty reacted to him in the movie and went “uh.” But you guys are literally forgetting that todomatsu is a matsuno.... plus totty literally tried to maul his own siblings? IDK to me it just kinda shows to todomatsu clearly feels close enough to atsushi in order to treat him like his siblings because totty is the kind of person who values what people think of him (including atsushi. In ep 7 season 2 he literally is apologizing to atsushi even when atsushi isnt even there which means he clearly cares about whether he is on good terms with him or not) so like....? If he really didnt like atsushi he just wouldnt hange out with him. He just got pissed off,,,, not very deep. Plus atsushi didnt even react.... which to me is just like.... he is close enough to totty to know he is dramatic and is use to having totty be a drunk menace to society. Also? People think he was being mean with the whole ‘neetville’ thing WHICH LIKE..... WHAT ABOUT IT.... like im not even convinced he meant it like that but even if he did, he is just teasing them....it really not that deep..... it is one negative interaction out of the many postitive ones they have had and its is mostly totty who is making a stink (which is a common theme.... BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN HE HATES ATSUSHI WE WILL GET THERE)

Back to atsushi, i feel like seeing him in highschool made me kinda get his character more (tho its just my interpretation so idk. I literally do not know how they characterize him in tabi or the spin off because i just havent seen translations for that stuff? Tho i know i heard that in one of the tabi events he was in people said he was nice to totty (aka he was a good guy... like we have known this.) but thats like.. it.) We barely see him talk! He is super quiet! Which is... going back to the last part.... kind makes the lines he has make sense? I feel like he isnt really the best at taking the lead in conversations and isnt really even that good of a conversationalist but he knows what people what to hear so he just says that and it usually works out fine? Like he can fake it well, like when i write a paper and think “idk what im talking about” and then i get it back and the prof is like “wow..... this was.... breathtaking...” like thanks my head is empty! idk if that makes sense but he just seems like the kind of person who was forced to get good at conversing when he finished highschool in order to network and shit but like deep down he would rather not. Like he is friendly! He has friends and he likes being with them but i feel like if it was up to him he would be a bit more reserved. And the fact he likes totty kinda speaks to this?

Before we get to that i should probably prove he likes totty but i feel like it is so obvious i shouldnt have to..... he set totty up with the girls in ep 7, he apparently goes to the gym with totty every now and then and like. Looks forward to it. The hesowars sprite where he is waving totty as if totty was some kind of celebrity (in front of the girls who clearly dont want to see him. Like atsushi is so oblivious to the fact the atmosphere is awkward because he is too busy being.... gay??? Sorry homies i decided it is gay.) also the offical art of totty and atsushi on a totally-not-a-date.... even if you take the subjective gay subtext i put on there off its still obvious atsushi and totty hang out and atsushi puts effort in in order to do so. I feel like the fact he is still in touch with totty after highschool speaks to just how much effort atsushi put in to keep him around because lets be 100%. Todomatsu seems like a NIGHTMARE to actually have a stable friendship that lasts more than a year with. This is the guy who literally does not get the concept of friendship... and yet here atsushi is.....very much being his friend

I feel like unless you are someone who is very good at reading inbetween the lines/a good listener, it would be impossible to be todomatsus friend just because of the front he puts up. I honestly think since they are highschool friends, totty doesnt put up as much of a front with atsushi cuz like... he saw totty at his most baby..... like you cant come back from that. But totty puts up fronts even with his own siblings so he definitely still has to put up some kind of front with atsushi. So i think atsushi being this quiet kid in highschool gave him the skills to deal with totty. I KNOW THAT SOUNDS MEAN I PROMISE I LOVE TOTTY IM JUST BEING REALISTIC. when you arent doing the talking and you are just listening and taking in what people are saying you start to pick up on a lot of little things. And because atsushi knows what totty was like in highschool i feel like he genuinely understands todomatsu as a person. Like totty can act self assured and dismissive but we (and atsushi) know that deep down he really craves affection and validation. Which is why atsushi sticks around with him and even goes as far as setting him up on dates. Atsushi is a quiet dork at heart. I will not budge on this.

So like where does the asshole rich man idea of atsushi even come from?? Because atsushi isnt really like that (tho i will admit it is very funny... rich asshole atsushi is very funny i can not lie)? The line about him having a car never came off as snobbish to me tbh it just seems awkward (like you know... a quiet kid who is forced to converse). Remember how i said we would come back to that? We are finally doing it. Todomatsu matsuno has too many insecurities and he projects them on the people around him. Notice how we always see atsushi from todomatsu perspective! Totty see atsushi as the guy who always one ups me and takes girls from me.... the guy who said neetville,,,, the guy who likes to look down on commoners..... but .... totty isnt a reliable narrator. Todomatsu has a hard time seeing other people as being genuine because he himself cant be genuine. So when atsushi hangs around him, he assumes that he must be looking down on him, because why else would someone like atsushi wanna be around someone like totty :( (i suggest “because he is gay” but like-) i think totty genuinely likes atsushi but he is so self sabotaging that he cant accept the idea that anyone who knows who he is could ever want to connect with him so he tries to keep atsushi at a distance and lashes out whenever atsushi unknowingly proves his warped perspection of him (an asshole rich guy) right because the idea of someone using ur misery as entertainment is upsetting to say the least.

Its 2020 and i cant believe i just rambled about atsutodo but i was thinking about atsushi recently plus...... i dont keep up with the oso fandom but i saw shit about people who thought atsutodo was.... bad??? And like I genuinely just cant see how you could get to that conclusion? It doesnt have to be ur thing but to reach and say its somehow “Problematic” ??????? The only messy thing about it is just totty being a matsuno like..... atsushi is genuinely such a chill guy i just... its not clicking for me.

Anyway atsushi is a dork man. Quiet highschool kid rep. Coconut head king. jon arbuckle. And if he wants to hold hands with todomatsu matsuno?? Who am i to stop him.... insert image of fma love is love thumbs up

In fact after all the effort he has put in? He deserves to hold his hand..... AND TOTTYS HAND DESERVES TO BE HELD/??/

Ok i have work to do bye

#fuzzy rambles #im suppose to be writing an paper on stress #but i got so stressed thinking about it i decided to talk about atsutodo like a loser #also forgot to eat dinner so im gonna do that

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kweebtrash · 5 years

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Could you make a drabble with Johnny masturbating while thinking of Eri? 🤭

I already did this in Ch. 3. So i decided to do a masturbation scene with phone sex, teasing, dirty talk, Johnny being really desperate and needy?, and a smidge of daddy kink. So like I hope that’s ok? Also in Johnny's POV(obvs).

[9:45pm]

Wyd?

I typed out my favorite three letters in hopes of enticing her enough to come over. I had no idea why but the feeling of her beneath me while I fucked her hard was suddenly stuck in my brain. It had been all I could think about for the past half hour and I couldn’t quit. I imagined pinning her legs down with mine and laying my body over hers which made her look smaller than she actually was. She would almost always squirm against me, shoving her ass back to take me deeper and I just-

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: not you. Bye

What?? Now I would have to spend extra time convincing her. God, fuck my life.

C'mon baby. I'll really make it worth your while

🦇BattOuttaHell🦇: yah I'm sure🙄 I'm busy

Doing what?

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: none of ur business. I'm busy

Jesus did I really have to beg? I bet she wasn't even doing anything. It’s fucking Tuesday night. Who does anything on a Tuesday?

Please baby? I can't stop thinking about you

Girls liked that shit,I didn't they? I mean...it was actually true though.

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: BWAHAHAHAHHA

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: lmao ur that desperate huh baby boy?

I'm not desperate 😑 just horny

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: hate to break it to ya but horny and bugging me is you being desperate

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: srsly tho I'm stuck studying for an exam I know jack shit about. I'm screwed

You can also be screwed if you come over

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: pls die

Why are you so violent all the time?!!

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: bruh violence is my middle name

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: sry but it'll just be u and ur hand tonight

I groaned because I really really didn't want that. I would much rather have her squeezed around my cock and hear those soft breathy moans she made all the time. She would always hold onto me then, maybe dig some scratches into my back as I went as deep as I could go. I groaned in frustration and wanted to throw my phone but persisted. I was going to regret typing this and was already cringing but I figured I had to pull out the big guns. We were still trying this whole thing out but a test drive wouldn't be so bad.

Princess, daddy really needs you

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: oh my god Johnathan

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: 🚫🛑✋

I thought you liked that???

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: I do

The ellipse signaling her response bubbled for awhile and I wondered what the hell kind of paragraph she was writing.

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: princess has to study. I'm srsly gonna fail😭😭

Just a little break? Please??

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: daddy with you it's never a "little break"

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: ull keep me there for hours and then I won't sleep and then I'll be tired and then I will fail

I sat up a little straighter staring at that word. It had a much different and more profound effect on me when she wrote it. I didn't cringe; instead I felt it deeply seeded within the base of my cock and it made my hormones go into overdrive. I quickly typed out a response hoping to make the conversation a bit more...dirty.

That's for sure

You know how long I can go and how weak you are for me when I've been inside you for hours.

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: I mean it's alright ig

Goddamn it! Why was she like this? She was such a frustrating little shit!

Bruh I'm just tryna get off ok? If you're not gonna come over can you at LEAST help me out a little??????????

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: wtf you want me to do? Sext you??

I mean it's better than you being a dick to me

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: aww baby boy wants to whineeee

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: u are pretty much begging at this point

I rolled my eyes hating that she was kind of right.

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: good thing I like to hear men beg for me

Oh shit. Did that mean that I was getting closer to her helping me? It was probably one of those kink things. I thought for awhile if I should actually swallow my pride and do it some more just to get her to participate. I was going to feel like an idiot but at least I'd be an idiot who came. I sent her a snap of me pouting with the puppy filter trying to be cute enough.

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: ur an idiot u know that right?

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: anyway idk how to sext?

What do you mean you dont know how to sext? You just do it.

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: well i’m not gonna say stuff your cock in my pussy thats fucking disgusting

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: also im a writer so it’s just gonna come out weird

Try me. You can like describe what you like me doing to you. Anything.

I set my phone down and waited for her to respond. It wasn’t that difficult. I did it all the time but i wanted her to start. I just wanted to hear her instead of being wrapped up in my stupid fantasies. I looked down at the bulge in my sweatpants and sighed. If i got started now then I would keep getting interrupted and have to wipe my hand off every time. I set my pillow over my head and hoped that if I suffocated myself enough then I wouldn't have to suffer any longer.

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: this is not going to be sexy at all lol

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: but i seriously love when you grab my hips and use it to fuck me deeper. I love how much you stretch me open, how much you fill me and those grunts you make when youre close

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: i love when youre fucking me from behind and press yourself into my back and pin my wrists down. You make me feel so small and wrapped up in protectiveness i guess? Or maybe possessiveness. You usually bite down on my neck and shoulders when youre like that. The hickies are a pain in the ass to cover but i love looking at them afterwards and feeling how tender they are. It makes me remember the ache and how i cant wait to fuck you again.

🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: is this ok?

Fuck. yes. I typed out as soon as my phone vibrated with her response.

Shit, i couldn’t believe just her typing something could get me even harder but i could feel myself throbbing beneath my sweats. I wanted her to keep going but I needed to get off before i couldn’t take it anymore. I dared to call her and hear her seductive but shy voice. I dialed her number and hoped to God she would answer.

"Are you trying to have phone sex with me?" She asked instantly.

"15 minutes." I panted. "Take a break for 15 minutes."

"No more than that. I really have to study…"

"I promise, baby. I promise." I shoved my sweats off, keeping the phone between my ear and shoulder, and grabbed the base of my cock. The first stroke was slow, steady, full of yearning and as it turned out desperation. Precum was already covering my head and making a mess but I used that to my advantage. It added slickness to my strokes, easily letting my palm slide up and down my shaft. "Please just talk to me."

Her voice seemed to get a little lower. "What do you want me to say?"

"Anything." I bit down on my lip for a moment as my hips lifted into a particularly rough jerk. "I just want to hear your voice."

"I want to hear your moans then. Those pants, the groans, those little growls. Don't hold back, Johnny."

I set the phone on speaker so I could keep it beside me and have more freedom. "Ye-yeah. I won't hold back trust me."

I gripped onto the blanket beside me, trying to remind myself that I needed to use those fifteen minutes to my full advantage. I knew with how much of a brat she was, she probably already had a timer going. I slowed my strokes a little bit, giving my fingers time to roll over my head and dip into my slit. I breathed out a soft pant as I focused everything on how sensitive I was. With each stroke of my fingers I imagined Eri on top of me, grinding into my hips and taking every inch I would give her. She looked so utterly gorgeous, like a fucking goddess every time she smirked down at me or set her hands on my chest to steady herself. Why was she so damn perfect?

"A little louder Johnny. I want to really hear you or else I'll hang up."

"N-no." I choked out. "F-fuck...I'm just thinking about you!"

My fist was trembling around the blanket as I could hardly hold back. I squeezed my hand a little tighter around myself trying to replicate the way she clenched around my cock. It wasn't exactly the same but damn near close.

"Hmm? Thinking about me? What am I doing to my baby boy?"

“Riding me! Fuck you’re riding me so fucking good.” I groaned louder than I expected. My thighs were starting to tremble just a bit and i dug my toes into the mattress. I was bucking even harder than before, The thoughts of her were driving me crazy; her voice was adding to it all and those coy little giggles made it even worse. I wanted her so fucking bad.

“Do you want to cum?” She breathed out.

“Yes.” I growled deeply. “Eri...shit…”

“You’re super cute when youre begging. Do you think I should let you?” She teased.

“Oh, i’m going to, whether you let me or not princess. What daddy says, goes.” i released another growl and gripped my balls with my other hand, squeezing them in a chaotic dance of pleasure and need.

“Not when daddy calls princess begging to fuck. You can hold out a bit longer. I deserve to hear a few more moans.”

I let out a growl of frustration. “Eri.” I said sternly. “I swear to god…”

“Say my name like that as you fuck me from behind.”

I tossed my head back into the mattress as the vision popped in my head instantly. My hand stroked at an ungodly pace as i felt my release approaching fast. I was a mess of feelings and sounds, drowning in my own lust and letting my body fall into every awakened nerve. My muscles tightened and i felt warmth rush over me. My breathing deepened as I squeezed out the last few ropes of cum that splattered all over my stomach. My hand was drenched as well and i flopped back, sighing as i knew i had so much to clean up. I picked up the phone with my clean hand and took her off speaker.

“14 minutes, 39 seconds. Good job.”

“I knew,” I licked my lips and tried to steady my breath. “You were fucking counting, you evil little shit.”

“Whhaaatttt! I have to get back to studying! Except I might have a little fun myself.”

“Are you kidding me? After I asked? God, i cant stand you.”

She chuckled and I could just see that devilish smirk on her face. “Mhm, whatever you say. I have to get going now. Have fun cleaning up.”

#the stupid bat emojis didnt copy over #fuck google docs #messy #time stamp #johnny fanfiction #johnny suh #johnny #johnny seo #nct 127 #nct 127 fanfic #johnny nct #nct 127 fanfiction #nct drabble #johnny drabbles #johnny drabble #johnny smut #so like they were talking dirty which they dont normall do but ya know

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starryboyjae · 6 years

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Coffee // Daniel

So, I know that this is long overdue but tada! This is my first bulleted scenario so.....

Genre: Fluffy fluff, Barista AU

Without further ado...

~~~

So, you’ve known Daniel since you were 4

as you started nursery, being seated next to the hyper boy that was shorter than you, you instantly became friends yay

you and him became besties and never left each other’s side since day 1 basically

now,

fast forward a lot of years

he’s a university student with a part time job at Wanna cafe

and you, well you couldn’t be bothered to get a job but you always accompany daniel to his work after uni and do your work there

since jisung and sungwoon own the cafe you’re welcome there anytime

and also because daniel’s older sister she’s basically your older sister as well is dating minhyun

you’ve become close to all the workers in the cafe, practically adopting daewhi and jinyoung

everybody at the cafe is your family even seongwoo who continuously says that you’re his rival for daniel’s affections

“sTOp SteaLInG DanIEl fRoM Me!”

“hE’s jUsT mY BEsT fRIEnD!”

“,,,,,”

“doN’t LIE tO ME!”

“I’M nOT!”

literally everybody can see that daniel has heart eyes for you

but like you don’t like daniel that way you sure mate

for the longest time, you both make time for each other so that nothing separates the two of you even through uni

but nothing goes as planned in life does it?

and so as you get swamped with essays and tests, you still try to make time to come to the cafe

but daniel’s not there

he’s taken shifts off to do uni-work and does different shifts and usually this wouldn’t bother you because,,,,,,

,,,, you’re fine

keep telling yourself that

now,

fast forward two months

you still havent seen daniel

on this particular day you’re missing daniel a little bit more as you had a really bad day

usually, he would bring you jellies whenever you were feeling down even though you hated jellies

but like its the thought that counts

and the thought of daniel just makes you even more upset :(

you’re making your way to the cafe as you usually do,,,,

,,,and then,,,,,

,,,there he is,,,,

standing there taking orders and tbh you’re really mad at him for not making time for you at all

so you, being you

ignore him

like a normal human being would

now daniel is sad because he though that you would be happy and run up to him

but you ignoring him :(

*puppy daniel activated*

he knows u cant stand seeing him upset so he takes advantage of that and basically guilt trips you into forgiving him

“Daniel stop it...”

“...”

“Danny...”

“...please...”

“No”

“forgive me!!”

“No”

“please with extra sprinkles on top!”

“fine...”

“YAY!”

And that was that

So of course you two started to spend time together again

him accompanying you to your classes, and you would like you used to, spend all your time either in the cafe or at daniel’s house

everything was going great

you had also become friends with a girl younger than you who frequented the cafe as well (hint hint, read Coffee for Woojin)

although something had changed,

you’re not quite sure if it was you or daniel, or even both of you

but you both were much more closer

you practically lived at daniel’s flat, even though he shares with ong, who still yells at you

it wasnt until one day when you were lounging at daniel’s flat talking with seongwoo when you asked him why he yells at you all the time

its cuz you’re stealing my boy from me - ong

i dont it,, also, we were best friends first - you

i dont care, but that boy is my soulmate and you are interfering - ong

how tho, - you

duh, cuz daniel obvs likes you - ong

wHaT - you

OoPs - ong

dO NoT rUn aWaY fROm mE MiStEr - you

i WaS PossEssED i dOnT KnOW WhAt Im sAYiNg - ong

srsly tho, wth mate - you

im sorry but srsly you shouldve noticed by now, since you like him too - ong

eXCusE ME whAT - you

sTOp ChOkInG mE - ong

you discussion with ong got you thinking,

did you like daniel

did daniel like you

did you like daniel

maybe

did daniel like you

maybe

this happened for another hour before you realised

that you,, mayhaps have a crush on kang daniel

your best friend

“I’m home guys!”

hehehehhe you forgot that you were still in daniel’s flat and so when he entered you malfunctioned

“BYE DANIEL I NEED TO GO GET SOME FOOD!”

“i could-” *slamming the door in daniel’s face*

“HAHAHHAHAHAHHHAHAHA!”

“what did you do seongwoo?”

“i told her that you like her”

wHaT - daniel

OoPs - ong

dO NoT rUn aWaY fROm mE MiStEr - daniel

sTOp ChOkInG mE - ong

daniel was annoyed now, his best friend found out about his crush

so he did what any logical person would do

he ran to your house since he guessed that you only said you needed food as an excuse

knocking on your door out of breath, he waits for you to open the door so that he can explain that ong was lying no he wasnt to salvage your friendship

“hi y/n!”

“heyyy ...”

“I just wanted to tell you that ong was lying when he said that i liked you, he’s a bit of an idiot sometimes,,, HAHAHA!”

the smile from your face instantly dropped as the words left his lips

“whats wrong y/n?”

“i was kinda hoping that ong was right, because i like you.. but nvrmd i see you later danny, bye :(”

“pls dont tell me your joking.”

“im not why ?”

“because i was lying not ong”

“explain”

“i like you too, and have like you for a very long time,,, im sorry i lied i just thought that you-”

no you didnt cut him off with a kiss, you werent disrespectful

you gave him a hug, a nice, warm hug

and of course he hugged you back

and kissed you but like maybe next time

and you best believe it always brings you free coffee

#poor ong was choked to death afterwards #daniel scenario #daniel kang #kang daniel #wanna one scenarios #wanna one imagines

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vaalinors · 7 years

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you’re the anchor (that i tied to my brain)

Edward Elric to the last jedi 9 pm DON’T BE FUCKING LATE IM TALKIN TO U YAO: pray tell where the fuck is my brother

Edward Elric: it is 8 o fucking clock

Edward Elric: im locked the fuck out of the house

Edward Elric: and al STILL ISN’T BACK FROM HIS GODFUCK SHITHOLE DATE

Paninya: ed take a deep breath n hurl urself into a pond or smth

Paninya: als been freakin out about mei for at least 38478392 years now

Paninya: let him relieve his thirst

Paninya: AND BTW THIS IS UR OWN DAMN FAULT

Edward Elric: how in The FUCK???? is this MY FAULT??????

Paninya: u couldve had a perfectly gross dorm on campus bUT NO U HAD TO BE BOUJEE N RENT AN APARTMENT WITH UR BROTHER

Edward Elric: IM ONLY LOCKED OUT BC AL LOST HIS GODDAMN KEY AND I

Edward Elric: BEING THE SAINTLY BROTHER THAT I AM

Ling Yao: w0w thats a lie

Edward Elric: GAVE HIM MINE AND NOW I GOTTA SCREAM AT HIM TILL HE PUTS HIS TONGUE BACK IN HIS OWN MOUTH AND COMES THE FUCK BACK

Winry Rockbell: u reeaaallly dont gotta

Paninya: have u heard??? of this thing??????

Paninya: called????? pm?????????????

Paninya: bc its a thing u could use to bitch at al without annoyin the entire shit outta the rest of us

Ling Yao: lol lan fans at her grandpas rn and her phone cant be put on silent

Ling Yao: shes going to kick ur ass

Edward Elric: IM gonna kick ALS ass if he doesnt show up in the next half hour I DONT CARE IF HES ON A FUCKIN DATE

Ling Yao: may i remind u my sister is the girl ur brothers currently wooing

Ling Yao: u do that and lan fan wont be the only one kicking ur ass

Edward Elric: what think u can take me weakLing

Ling Yao: uh duh but i was talking about mei

Edward Elric: PLS shes what half a foot tall????? PLSSSSSSS

Lan Fan: so twice as tall as you

Edward Elric: DO,,,,,U WANT,,,,,,.,TO FUCKING DIE,,,,,,,.,.,,,,

Lan Fan: edward

Lan Fan: i am at my grandfathers house

Lan Fan: my phone is ringing so loud my neighbors think their doorbells r broken

Lan Fan: my grandfather is ready to smash it into oblivion

Lan Fan: if he does we WILL be reliving 3/10 and youll be tasting a lot more than just your stomach acid when im done with you

Lan Fan: do not make me sneak out of training to answer you again

Paninya: Rekt™

Ling Yao: mic drop

Edward Elric: psh whatever

Edward Elric: u fuckers think 3/10 scared me

Edward Elric: GUESS FUCKING AGAIN

Edward Elric: FUCKING C O M E A T M E

Paninya: o look shes typing

Edward Elric: anyway im gonna pm al goodnight and thank u

Winry Rockbell to is it gay to want to literally drink ushers voice: OI AL how was the date

Winry Rockbell: I WANT DETAILS

Edward Elric: if anyone wants to know how to be the Creepiest Fucking Person Ever

Edward Elric: talk to winry

Winry Rockbell: well seeing that i won best ed impression two years in a row now id say i do indeed know

Edward Elric: HAR DE HAR

Edward Elric: u think u fucking know me???

Alphonse Elric: Is it hard?

Paninya: yea all u rlly gotta do is yell fuck a lot

Alphonse Elric: Put ur hair in a braid with one obnoxious ass strand sticking right up

Winry Rockbell: dont forget u have to crouch down

Winry Rockbell: i recommend kneeling

Edward Elric: dont think i cant deck all u shitdicks

Ling Yao: ive just annoyed the info out of my sister

Ling Yao: it seems al is quite the casanova

Ling Yao: clearly not a family trait BUT

Edward Elric: i will piss in ur backpack

Ling Yao: case in point

Ling Yao: ANYWAYS UPDATE ON THE BET FRONT

Ling Yao: as im sure u all know ned, roy mustang and i have had an ongoing wager AKA who can wrangle the most freshies into joining his club

Ling Yao: well as of today the martial arts/dance troupe has 20 more members

Edward Elric: BULLSHIT

Ling Yao: and i believe that pulls me ahead of ned to tie evenly with mustang

Ling Yao: and really would any of u choose archery over martial arts??

Paninya: tbh i choose social life over any clubs but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Edward Elric: basic bitch

Paninya: u kno it

Paninya: but srsly wtf shifty how did u get 20 new members so fast

Lan Fan: he showed off and gave his number out to like half of them

Ling Yao: :O how could u EXPOSE ME LIKE THIS

Ling Yao: I tRuSTeD YOu

Lan Fan: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Edward Elric: just u fuckin wait ling

Edward Elric: ill leave both u asshats in the GROUND

Alphonse Elric: I mean first u have to

Alphonse Elric: Yknow

Alphonse Elric: Be taller than the ground

Edward Elric: I LIVE WITH U I CAN MAKE UR LIFE FUCKING MISERABLE U HEAR

Winry Rockbell to kyle ron WHOMST???: so about laser tag this weekend

Winry Rockbell: invite lings sister yay or nay

Lan Fan: why not

Rosé Thomas: It’d even us out

Rebecca Catalina: does it even matter tbh we all kno whichever team rizas on is gonna win

Riza Hawkeye: Catalina i resent that statement

Rebecca Catalina: pls point to me where thE LIE IS HAWKEYE

Winry Rockbell: ok then

Winry Rockbell added Mei Chang to the chat

Paninya: EY UVE JUST BECOME PART OF THE MESS THAT IS US SOPHS

Maria Ross: and a few seniors

Paninya: WE’RE BASICALLY A KPOP GROUP BUT BETTER (ʘ‿ʘ✿)

Lan Fan: ok we’re going laser tagging this weekend you in

Mei Chang: i feel like i may die if i say no so as long as my idiot brother isn’t going i’m in

Paninya to could u actually perhaps makin bacon pancakes: [DELETED MESSAGE]

Ling Yao: wot

Alphonse Elric: Whos going laser tagging

Winry Rockbell: pan ffs

Paninya: (◔◡◔✿)

Edward Elric: fuckin RUDE

Lan Fan to Panko: what is it

Panko: i have no idea what u mean my dear

Lan Fan: uve been typing for an hour now AND i can hear your teeth grinding from my room

Panko: i have no idea what u could be referring to my sweet

Panko: i just wanna kno how ur days been

Lan Fan: this is about ling isnt it

Panko: dear

Panko: u used an emoji

Panko: u never use emojis

Lan Fan: look i get that youre just looking out for me

Lan Fan: but its fine and so am i

Lan Fan: i really dont need a pity heart to heart

Lan Fan: besides hed give out his number to everyone in the world if he could thats just who he is

Panko: well ur not wrong

Panko: is it bad to say im so glad i rarely have to deal with bois

Lan Fan: girls can be idiots too

Panko: ppl in general usually r

Alphonse Elric to WE CANT KEEP DOWN ALL THAT VODKA ON KRAFT MAC N CHEESE: So i cant feel

Ling Yao: mY FACE WHEN IM WITH U

Alphonse Elric: That and the rest of my body

Alphonse Elric: How is one person so funny and sweet and amazing

Paninya: MY SON HES IN LOVE YALL

Paninya: ITS TRUE FUCKIN LOVE

Paninya: ELRIC 2.0 TEXT ME IF U NEED ANYTHIN

Paninya: CONDOMS

Winry Rockbell: oh god

Paninya: BIRTH CONTROL

Edward Elric: PAN WHAT THE FUCK U THINK AL KNOWS WHAT A CONDOM IS

Paninya: HE IS A HORNY TEENAGE BOI I BET U MY ENTIRE ASS HES USED ONE BEFORE

Lan Fan: PANINYA

Mei Chang: uh

Paninya: oh fuck

Ling Yao: mei so it was U that made that balloon fart noise just now

Lan Fan: ling kindly shut up

Edward Elric: SO AL ISNT BREATHING I THINK HES DEAD

Edward Elric: HES BEEN STARING AT HIS PHONE FOR 10 MINS NOW FUCK WHAT DO I DO

Paninya: CALL 911 U MORON

Lan Fan: where do you live i know CPR

Ling Yao: thats hot

Winry Rockbell: MEI PRETEND U CANT READ

Mei Chang: er i can’t read suddenly i don’t know

Ling Yao: (╯°□°)╯now she gives in to the memes

Edward Elric: ok nvm hes alive

Edward Elric: buT I M NOT GONNA BE FUC KBRB RUNNINGgh

Paninya: rip in peace

Alphonse Elric to how Extra™ do u gotta be to come up with fuccboi: So we’re still down for gta tomorrow right

Alphonse Elric: Ed cant make it because i killed him

Ling Yao: the old ed cant come to the phone right now

Ling Yao: why

Edward Elric: because hes going to cut off lings fucking elbows

Roy Mustang: can you even reach his fingers

Edward Elric: listeN HERE U liL SHIT

Alphonse Elric kicked Edward Elric from the chat

Ling Yao: thats cold

Ling Yao added Edward Elric to the chat

Roy Mustang: i knew it couldnt last

Edward Elric: if any of u polefucks ever want to know how to get ling to do something bother lan fan

Ling Yao: try it again and i will Key Your Face

Ling Yao: she has a physics test tomorrow

Alphonse Elric: Wow

Roy Mustang: :O

Jean Havoc: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Edward Elric: i got the beer for tmr night

Alphonse Elric: Damn right u do im not letting u in otherwise

Edward Elric: ignore asshurt over here hes pissed i embarrassed him in front of his date

Roy Mustang: at least he has one

Jean Havoc: yeah have u ever had a girlfriend edward??

Denny Brosh: Do you know what a woman is ned????

Edward Elric has left the chat

Ling Yao to Good Shit ✔💯: hey lan fan

Ling Yao: LAN FAAAAAN

Good Shit ✔💯: what

Ling Yao: guess who i just saw in chem doodling one miss rockbells name on his hw

Good Shit ✔💯: no

Ling Yao: oh yes

Ling Yao: i wanted to take a pic but ed decided to be a good student and tore it off before handing it in

Good Shit ✔💯: does he even try in chem

Ling Yao: no but at least he doesnt fall asleep like he does in lit

Good Shit ✔💯: hemingway puts everyone to sleep

Good Shit ✔💯: read some brontë or steinbeck

Good Shit ✔💯: id say dickens too but anti Semitism and all

Ling Yao: i love it when u talk lit to me

Ling Yao: reminds me of when u used to sneak into our library and read the biggest books u could find

Good Shit ✔💯: better than you climbing up the side of my house to sneak into my room

Ling Yao: pls u loved it

Good Shit ✔💯: debatable

Good Shit ✔💯: club meetings today dont forget

Ling Yao: how can i ur always here to remind me ;)

Winry Rockbell added Roy Mustang, Riza Hawkeye, Jean Havoc, Maria Ross, and Rebecca Catalina to ROSE TYLER DEFENSE SQUAD WHERE YALL AT

Winry Rockbell: just so we’re clear friday nights a byob sitch

Lan Fan: well wade was totally off

Ling Yao: atta girl

Paninya: wow and here i was thinkin byob meant bug ur own business

Edward Elric: what the utter fuck

Alphonse Elric: Dont act coy u LIVED a bugs life ed

Winry Rockbell: BRING YOUR OWN BOTTLE CAPICHE

Winry Rockbell: jesus now ive got the kim possible theme song stuck in my head

Edward Elric: if one of u picks yoshi i will e n d u

Paninya: no promises n its not our fault yoshi pushed ur fool ass off mushroom gorge that one time

Rebecca Catalina: LMAOOO

Edward Elric: that demonic fucking dinosaur needs to go extinct

Roy Mustang: since brosh doesnt give a shit do we want to make this a floor thing

Ling Yao: i see what ur doing mercedes benz u sneak ass

Roy Mustang: you caught up yao i can finally start trying

Edward Elric: news flash fuckers i got 5 more ppl today u can both suck my ASS

Winry Rockbell: ok but keep it small

Lan Fan: ,,,,,,,

Maria Ross: this is why timing’s important kids

Ling Yao: how much smaller could his butt get

Roy Mustang: are we even be able to locate it

Rebecca Catalina: does ned even have a torso????

Edward Elric: I HOPE U ALL ROT IN HELL

Paninya changed the chat name to eds ass is bigfoot pass it on

Winry Rockbell to Mulan but Better: is it weird that i cant stop smiling at ed

Winry Rockbell: hes sleeping in the chair across from me

Mulan but Better: a bit

Winry Rockbell: yeah

Winry Rockbell: hes such a nerd

Mulan but Better: but hes your nerd

Roy Mustang changed the chat name to WHO TE HFUCKS IDEA WAS IT O MAKE THIS AFLOOR THING

Edward Elric changed the chat name to URS U FUCKING CURLY STRAW

Paninya to wubba lubba dub dub: all of u need to see this Spicy™ video of ed from last night

Winry Rockbell: pan its 9 fucking am

Winry Rockbell: who tf is up that cares

Paninya: o dont u worry winnie the pooh

Lan Fan: yep shes still drunk

Paninya: i think ed will when he stops groaning in the bathroom there

Paninya sent a video in the chat

Paninya: srsly im postin this on ig later

Winry Rockbell: SHIT thats loud

Alphonse Elric: What the fuck is that

Riza Hawkeye: Is

Riza Hawkeye: Is he singing mad world

Paninya: u bet ur blonde ass he is

Lan Fan: was this after we took turns playing yoshi and demolishing him in mario kart

Paninya: u bet ur toned ass it was

Winry Rockbell: paninya i can barely hear anything over u shouting STRIP STRIP STRIP in the bg

Ling Yao: edward really is tone deaf isnt he

Ling Yao: oh hes stopped puking

Ling Yao: hes looking at his phone

Alphonse Elric: Rip in peace our bloodshot eyes

Edward Elric: wHAT THE ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS IS THAT

Edward Elric: WHAT THE ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS

Edward Elric: WHAT THE ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS DID U ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS DO TO MY PHONE

Ling Yao: HAHAHAHA OH MY GOD

Roy Mustang: dear jesus what is happening

Paninya: oH MY WHICH ONE OF U DID THIS

Paninya: I WILL K I S S U

Mei Chang: there is way too much shouting this goddamn early in the morning

Ling Yao: while u were busy cackling over that video i may or may not have convinced lan fan to steal eds phone

Edward Elric: U ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS BETTER ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS FIX MY ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS PHONE OR IM ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS

Jean Havoc: hes like an infuriated duck with a lisp

Roy Mustang: siri what is the tiniest species of duck

Edward Elric: U WANNA ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS FIGHT

Paninya: pls tell me one of u hungover fucks is gettin this on video

Mei Chang: lan fan u okay?

Lan Fan: yeah too much shouting i have a headache

Lan Fan: add me back when ed calms down (◕ ‿ ◕✿)

Lan Fan has left the chat

Paninya: hey ed ill bet even yoshi can say fuck

Edward Elric: FOR ALL AROUND ME ARE FAMILIAAAAR FAAAAACEESSS SAKE

Lan Fan to Guns n Roses: hey

Lan Fan: i dont know where you are rn

Lan Fan: im still sort of hungover and i kind of need someone to talk to who isnt going to get angry or

Lan Fan: try and rationalize everything and well

Lan Fan: do you ever just wish that things could change

Lan Fan: that you could be someone entirely different or that you could get out and leave and not give a damn about anything or anyone or

Lan Fan: because ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Guns n Roses: Okay i was at work but i’m coming back right now

Guns n Roses: And i’m going to get you tea and you’re going to tell me whatever you want to tell me okay??

Lan Fan: thanks

Paninya to ID SING OH CANADA TOO IF MY PM HAD AN ASS LIKE THAT: ok but for real

Paninya: dicks r like mushrooms

Paninya: little funny gross mushrooms

Rosé Thomas: Paninya you’re high go home

Paninya: oh sweet flower i wish i was

Winry Rockbell: its 4 fucking am GO TO SLEEP

Paninya: time is an illusion

Paninya to TRICKY tricky TRICKY tricky: i crave the sweet release of death

Edward Elric: FUCKING KARMA

Winry Rockbell: i could hear u playing music at 5 am again today why tf have u been up so late

Paninya: my roommate was screaming french at me

Paninya: she has a test today

Paninya: also

Paninya added Lan Fan to the chat

Paninya: LAN FANNNNNNNN

Lan Fan: i didnt do the psych hw paninya

Lan Fan: and run-dmc doesnt deserve this subpar treatment

Alphonse Elric: Lan fan

Alphonse Elric: Lings been looking for u

Lan Fan: i know its ok dont worry about it

Edward Elric: A FUCKING BIRD JUST SHAT ON MY HEAD

Paninya: what was that????? u said???????

Paninya: about karma?????????

Edward Elric: WHAT IS THIS LITERAL SHIT ON ED DAY

Lan Fan: is that not everyday

Edward Elric: I WILL FIGHT ALL U ASSDICKS

Lan Fan: 3/10 edward

Edward Elric: i will fight me for only i myself am the one assdick here thank u amen and goodbye

Lan Fan to Literal Monkey™: so i hear you were looking for me

Literal Monkey™: that depends

Literal Monkey™: what did i do lan fan

Literal Monkey™: did i say something

Literal Monkey™: tell me what i did that made you so upset at me

Literal Monkey™: if i did something im sorry i really am but you cant just disappear and not even tell me whats wrong

Lan Fan: i know

Lan Fan: it wasnt you i just

Lan Fan: my grandfathers relapse and its been rough with classes lately

Lan Fan: it kind of hit me that i cant always afford to be chill all the time

Lan Fan: sorry ive been mia

Literal Monkey™: well now i feel like a dick

Literal Monkey™: ur my best friend lan fan and i think ive gotten so used to u being near i freak out when ur not

Literal Monkey™: i guess it kind of says something about me that might not be a good thing

Literal Monkey™: especially since i climbed the side of ur house to see if u went back home and u werent there

Lan Fan: you w h a t

Ling Yao to Frying Pan: in hindsight

Ling Yao: i prob shouldnt have told her about the climbing

Ling Yao: shes not talking to me again

Frying Pan: u done fucked up boiii

Ling Yao: so will u tell me whats really wrong with her now

Frying Pan: not a chance boiii

Winry Rockbell to Wannabe Alchemist: hey i know its kind of sudden

Winry Rockbell: and u prob have other things to do

Wannabe Alchemist: nah im free shoot

Winry Rockbell: could u maybe come with me this weekend

Wannabe Alchemist: …are u sure

Wannabe Alchemist: i mean of course ill go hell even if i had a meeting with the goddamn president id skip it to go anywhere with u

Wannabe Alchemist: but i dont want to overstep my right or anything

Winry Rockbell: no ed u could never impose

Winry Rockbell: its just been kind of a shit year

Winry Rockbell: i dont know if i can handle going to visit them alone this time

Wannabe Alchemist: dont worry im there for u

Wannabe Alchemist: whatever u need

Winry Rockbell: i

Winry Rockbell: thanks ed

Wannabe Alchemist: theyd be proud of u win

Winry Rockbell: :)

Winry Rockbell: not to degrade ur sentiment or anything because damn ed u can be sweet

Winry Rockbell: but id do buttfuck anything besides meet with our president

Wannabe Alchemist: i read that as u would butt fuck anything but shit u right

Mei Chang to “3/10 WASNT EVEN THAT BAD” famous last words: paninya was that you outside my school trying to sell taylor swift tshirts

Lan Fan: paninya what the hell

Paninya: ok HS GIRLS EAT TSWIFT UP

Mei Chang: you looked stalkerish as hell my principal was going to call the police

Winry Rockbell: just burn them in a rusty can like the ratchet ho u are

Paninya: what is This Disrespect™ n pls im not gonna burn them that merch cost me lk 984759 bucks

Lan Fan: sounds fake but ok

Ling Yao: and why tf would u sell them taylor swift is finally getting interesting

Winry Rockbell: yeah shes finally being savage af isnt this what u signed up for

Paninya: hey i signed up for Drama Taylor

Paninya: this is just plain whoring for attention

Alphonse Elric: Not sure those terms are mutually exclusive

Edward Elric: HOLY FUCK

Lan Fan: speaking of whoring for attention

Edward Elric: I GOT MUSTANG TO PLAY LEAGUE

Edward Elric: went straight for brand the dumb fucking pyromaniac

Alphonse Elric: Can i just remind u that ur first time ur jerk ass went right for garen

Edward Elric: GAREN is a PERFECTLY FUCKING GOOD CHAMPION TO GO FOR WHEN UR A NOOB DUMBASS

Alphonse Elric: Sounds fake but ok

Ling Yao: and a bit like neds trying to compensate for something

Edward Elric: U ALL AINT SHIT

Lan Fan: its yaint

Ling Yao: u uncultured fuck

Paninya: k first of all lol is a game for 13 year old prepubescent boys

Lan Fan: so perfect for edward

Edward Elric: DONT FUCKING TRY U KNOW UR A HO FOR AKALI

Edward Elric: ,,,,,,,,dont say 3/10 u know i would rather fucking die

Lan Fan: then perish

Alphonse Elric: Ed did U make that whale noise

Winry Rockbell: the real question here is paninya???? can actually spell???????? words???????? whAT??????

Paninya: SECOND OF ALL any of u want tswift shirts hmu (◡‿◡✿)

Edward Elric: taylor swift is fucking great why the fuck would u sell them

Winry Rockbell: ………..

Alphonse Elric: ……………………

Paninya: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Lan Fan changed the chat name to ill take edward elric is fake Punk Rock™ for 800 alex

Edward Elric: OI U CAN BE PUNK ROCK AND STILL LISTEN TO GUILTY PLEASURE POP

Winry Rockbell: SOUNDS FAKE BUT OK

Rosé Thomas added Mei Chang, Alphonse Elric, Edward Elric, Roy Mustang, and Riza Hawkeye to Unnamed

Paninya changed the chat name to PROJECT LINGFAN

Paninya: ALRIGHT LISTEN UP

Alphonse Elric: What the hell is lingfan

Paninya: PLS WITHHOLD ALL QUESTIONS TILL THE END OF THE BRIEFING MY PRECIOUS CHILD

Winry Rockbell: she continues??? to spell????? correctly???????? what i am amazed?????????????

Paninya: ROCKBELL FULL OFFENSE STFU

Winry Rockbell: rude

Paninya: SO EVERYONE HERE KNOWS OUR GOOD FRIEND LING YAO AKA SHIFTY AKA MONKEY BOI AKA CO-PRES OF THE MARTIAL ARTS/DANCE TROUPE YEA

Mei Chang: if i say no can i leave

Paninya: AND EVERYONE ALSO KNOWS MY SPICY GIRL LIGHT OF MY LIFE LAN FAN AKA DEFINITION OF BADASS AKA EDS WORST NIGHTMARE AKA CO-PRES OF THE MARTIAL ARTS/DANCE TROUPE YEA

Edward Elric: she is not my worst fucking nightmare

Mei Chang: so you don’t turn into a stuttering baby every time she brings up 3/10

Edward Elric: U WERENT THERE U DONT FUCKING K N O W

Paninya: AND EVERYONE HERE KNOWS THAT THOSE 2 HAVE THE BIGGEST RAGING BONERS FOR EACH OTHER THAT ANYONES EVER FUCKIN SEEN YEA

Winry Rockbell: i feel like there was a better way of putting that

Edward Elric: wait hold THE FUCK UP ur fucking with me right

Roy Mustang: yes edward

Roy Mustang: she made an entire separate chat and invited all these people just so she could fuck with you

Alphonse Elric: Thats literally what the normal group chat is for wtf ned

Edward Elric: what the UTTER FUCK???? LING AND LAN FAN????????

Rosé Thomas: You were right winry he’s blind

Alphonse Elric: Dude how the hell are u so ignorant

Riza Hawkeye: Edward are you really unaware of this

Edward Elric: HOW DO U ALL KNOW ABOUT THIS WHAT THE FUCK

Roy Mustang: id ask if you saw them at the floor party but i remembered you were too busy practicing for your x factor audition

Paninya: OK ED SINCE UR CLEARLY THE OBLIVIOUSEST FUCKING PERSON ON THE FACE OF THE GODDAMN PLANET

Winry Rockbell: obliviousest

Winry Rockbell: i knew it wouldnt last

Paninya: LET ME JUST HIT U WITH SOME EXAMPLES

Paninya: LAN FAN NEVER BLUSHES UNLESS U MENTION LING TO HER AND THEYVE KNOWN EACH OTHER SINCE C H I L D H O O D

Paninya: WHEN LAN FAN SHATTERED HER ARM IN FRESHMAN YEAR LING CARRIED HER HALFWAY TO THE DAMN HOSPITAL AND SLEPT NEXT TO HER SICKBED FOR THE ENTIRE WEEK SHE WAS THERE

Roy Mustang: he threatened to and i quote ‘key your face’ if you bothered her again

Winry Rockbell: lan fan only shattered her arm that time because some dumbass thugs tried to jump ling in order to threaten his dad

Mei Chang: whenever lan fan doesnt answer him right away he gets all huffy and paces for hours and checks his phone like 500 times until she replies LIKE SHE ALWAYS DOES

Paninya: LITERALLY TODAY OK RIZA CAN CONFIRM IM WALKIN TO MEET LAN FAN FOR PSYCH AND I SEE HER PRACTICING A FUCKING KARATE MOVE OR SOME SHIT WITH LING ON THE QUAD

Paninya: SHE STARTS LAUGHING AND I SWEAR ON MY FANTASTIC ASS LING STARES AT HER FOR 10 WHOLE MINS

Paninya: SHES BENDING HIS LEG FARTHER THAN ANY LEG SHOULD BEND AND HES LOOKING AT HER LIKE SHES THE ONLY DAMN THING WORTH KNOWING IN THE ENTIRE FUCKIN UNIVERSE

Paninya: THIS HAS BEEN HAPPENIN FOR YEARS I CANT EVEN WITH THEIR UNNECESSARY ANGST ANYMORE

Paninya: THEY NEED TO GET THEIR SHIT TOGETHER BEFORE I ACTUALLY FUCKIN EXPLODE JFC (╯✿◕益◕)╯︵ ┻━┻

Riza Hawkeye: That is indeed what happened

Rosé Thomas: And that’s why we made this chat

Rosé Thomas: So all of you can experience our pain

Edward Elric: ,,,,,,

Alphonse Elric: Seriously wtf is a lingfan

Mei Chang to pacific rim uprising is the sequel we didnt know we wanted and always needed no one fight me on this: you all know my name is mei right

Paninya: first time im hearin it

Mei Chang: because my calc teacher doesnt

Winry Rockbell: oh god what does he call u

Mei Chang: literally ‘mee’

Edward Elric: RIP IN FUCKING PEACE

Paninya: wot in tarnation

Ling Yao: u mean wot in pronunciation

Mei Chang: mee-eye is okay and mYE sure but MEE

Paninya: dw a teacher called me panYEA once lk??? bless u????

Edward Elric: omfg PETITION TO CALL PANINYA PANYEAH FROM NOW ON

Lan Fan: panno

Winry Rockbell: a teacher called me wine-ry in fifth grade like how in the actual fuck could u mess win-ree up

Edward Elric: maybe bc u were indeed hella whiny

Winry Rockbell: at least she knew i was there u were too smol to see over the table

Alphonse Elric: Better loud than nonexistent

Edward Elric: GTFO AL I WAS FUCKING TALLER THAN U

Paninya: “was”

Mei Chang: in any case i’m done trying to correct him hello yes my name is mee

Ling Yao: and wen it nite

Paninya: wtf r u on ling yao n where can i get some

Winry Rockbell: its another fucking meme i stg lan fan pls control this boy

Lan Fan: the kalc teachre cannt saye it rhite

Ling Yao: vINdICatION

Edward Elric to PROJECT LINGFAN: fuck this they gotta be in love

Winry Rockbell to Mulan but Better: hey theyre selling stroop waffles outside the bio building

Winry Rockbell: i can grab some for u if ur in class

Winry Rockbell: wait is that u in line

Winry Rockbell: are u wearing a lab coat

Winry Rockbell: u ran out of class didnt u

Winry Rockbell: did u not even bother to take off ur goggles u look like a nerdy terminator

Winry Rockbell: how many are u buying holy shit ARE U STUFFING THEM IN UR LABORATORY COAT POCKETS

Winry Rockbell: DID U JUST N A R U T O R U N OUT OF THE QUAD

Mulan but Better: why are you still asking me you know the answers yes

Roy Mustang to My Queen™: theyre selling stroop waffles right now

My Queen™: Has ling gotten there yet

Roy Mustang: theyre no longer selling stroop waffles right now

Rosé Thomas to 7 excellents and LAN FAN THE WAFFLE TRAITOR: It’s official

Rosé Thomas: Mustang won the bet

Winry Rockbell: wow i forgot that was still going on

Maria Ross: how’s ed taking it

Rosé Thomas: Oh how you would think he’d take it

Paninya: EYYYY EDS GONNA ATTRACT THE CAMPUS POPO AGAIN

Roy Mustang to PROJECT LINGFAN (WHAT IS A LINGFAN SOMEONE TELL ME ALREADY): if ling lost the bet he had to choose

Roy Mustang: either actually outright confess to lan fan or end whatever it is they have

Paninya: Y TF WOULD U GIVE HIM THE SECOND OPTION ALL THEY NEED TO DO IS STOP DANCIN AROUND EACH OTHER N BANG

Alphonse Elric: Paninya its more complicated than that

Paninya: WHAT IN THE 7TH RING OF HELL COULD BE SO COMPLICATED ABOUT THIS

Mei Chang: long story short

Mei Chang: our familys shit deep in politics

Mei Chang: either ling gets in there shit deep too or hes married off

Edward Elric: well fuck

Rosé Thomas: Lan fan knows

Rosé Thomas: When she messaged me after the party i found out that this is why she was so upset

Rosé Thomas: Apparently a drunk ling told her that she should leave him because ‘he’s scared about what would happen if he stopped caring and she deserves better than a coward’

Paninya: well now i feel like shit

Mei Chang: welcome to my world

Mei Chang to Secret Swiftie: remember how you came to my school and almost got arrested

Mei Chang: a couple of girls are asking about your tshirts

Secret Swiftie: call it what u want is a fuckin eargasm I TAKE IT ALL BACK ALL OF IT

Secret Swiftie: I HAVE HEARD AN ACTUAL REAL LIFE A N G E L

Mei Chang: great i’ll tell them you died

Lan Fan to WHOS FAKE PUNK ROCK NOW U FILTHY FUCKING HYPOCRITES P A N I N Y A: has anyone seen my book

Paninya: what book is it

Lan Fan: howard’s end

Alphonse Elric: Forsters great

Winry Rockbell: sorry i havent

Lan Fan: its fine i probably left it in the studio

Ling Yao: oi i was just kicked out of the dining hall what kind of DISRESPECT

Paninya: k but u were eatin all the soup

Ling Yao: is that a crime now

Winry Rockbell: u took the entire pot ling

Lan Fan: you didnt even try to be stealthy about it you just ran back to your seat giggling

Mei Chang: how are they just kicking you out now

Lan Fan: oh they have he climbs back in through the window

Edward Elric: last week u complained the rice wasnt cooked

Ling Yao: have u????? had the rice here??????? itS C R U N C H Y

Edward Elric: jfc lower ur standards ur highness this is college

Lan Fan: you dont pay 70K a year to eat

Paninya: just suck it up lk the rest of us

Winry Rockbell: its either this or starve yao

Ling Yao: :O

Ling Yao changed the chat name to fake friends™

Alphonse Elric to cAn yOU FEeL iT Now mR KRAbs: What the everloving fuck do i have to murder to find out what the shit lingfan is?????¿¿¿¿¿

Lan Fan: …..

Alphonse Elric: Ah

Alphonse Elric: Wrong chat

Paninya: (✿◉‿◉)

Winry Rockbell: AL FOR THE LOV EOF

Winry Rockbell kicked Lan Fan from the chat

Winry Rockbell kicked Ling Yao from the chat

Mei Chang: you know they can still see previous messages

Edward Elric: fuckkkkkk

Paninya: well first time not directin this at edward

Paninya: duuuuuude u fucked up

Panko to Lan Fan: hey i saved u a seat in psych but u didnt look over

Panko: is this about kickin u out of the squad chat

Lan Fan: do they all know

Panko: uh kno what

Lan Fan: does everyone know paninya

Panko: if i answer will u promise not to disappear again

Panko: no one told anyone else about it if thats what ur angry about we all figured it out by ourselves

Panko: well except for ed but that boi is dumb af

Panko: n im not sayin u guys were obvious or anything it took a while until we saw it

Lan Fan: i think im going to go back to my grandfathers for the weekend

Panko: pls dont drop off the face of the earth again

Lan Fan: i wont i was going to go back anyway and space is good

Panko: ur not the only one in this lan fan

Panko: no matter how much u wont see it

Lan Fan: (◠‿◠✿)

Winry Rockbell to PROJECT LINGFAN (ALPHONSE ELRIC DONE FUCKED UP YALL): so lan fans gone

Winry Rockbell: when did u say ling had to make a choice mustang

Roy Mustang: i didnt??

Edward Elric: u said he had to make a decision and DIDNT GIVE HIM A SHITDAMN DEADLINE

Edward Elric: ITS NEVER GONNA HAPPEN NOW HONDA

Paninya: well thats just great chevrolet

Riza Hawkeye: You really didnt think this through bmw

Roy Mustang: wow at least i didnt blow our cover

Alphonse Elric: Dont throw me under the bus with u toyota at least im repentant

Paninya: alright well now that lamborgini royally fucked up

Winry Rockbell: “lamborgini”

Winry Rockbell: so close

Edward Elric: so what the fuck is gonna happen now

Winry Rockbell: ok mei can talk to ling bc she lives with him

Mei Chang: unfortunately

Rosé Thomas: I don’t know if lan fan will be willing to talk

Rosé Thomas: She used an emoji again

Mei Chang: actually i’ll talk to her someone else tackle my brother

Paninya: idk how to speak fuccboi language one of the guys gotta do it

Winry Rockbell: after roy and als fuckups who else can we choose

Edward Elric: RUDE

Roy Mustang: sit down you didnt even know they were a thing

Edward Elric: MAYBE BC I DONT POKE MY FUCKING NOSE INTO OTHER PPLS BUSINESS

Alphonse Elric: Well ofc u physically cant ned

Winry Rockbell: can u even see other ppl without platform shoes

Mei Chang: or a ladder

Edward Elric: UR FUCKING SHORTER THAN ME JFC

Paninya to milk: hate it, shouting: always, music taste: shite = I AM FORCIBLY SHUT INTO THE BODY OF A SIX YEAR OLD: RIZA TOLD ME THERE IS A PETTING ZOO 3 MILES AWAY YALL MEET AT MY CAR IN 5

Edward Elric: we’re already fucking here

Ling Yao: lol weve been here for an hour

Alphonse Elric: Mustangs been holding a komodo dragon for approx half that time

Mei Chang: winry drove us and there are llamas

Winry Rockbell: i am surrounded by puppies rn am i dead

Paninya: bitch u r to me im writin u all out of my will CLEARLY ALL MY M8S ARE SHIT

Ling Yao to Sister Mine: mei

Ling Yao: meiiiiiii

Sister Mine: i’m literally right next to you what

Ling Yao: have u ever seen lan fan with her hair down

Sister Mine: once during the floor party you all snuck me into

Sister Mine: why do you ask

Ling Yao: her hair tie broke a few days ago and she was fussing with it and i couldnt breathe

Sister Mine: when her hair is down??

Ling Yao: up, down, soaking, gone

Ling Yao: she takes my breath away, mei

Ling Yao: she takes my breath away no matter what she does, or say, or looks like and i am a coward

Sister Mine: you may be right

Ling Yao: are you ashamed of me?

Sister Mine: that depends

Sister Mine: what do you plan to do about it

Lan Fan to Literal Monkey™: hey i know its 5 am and youre probably not even awake and this is probably useless anyway considering ive been transparent as all hell

Lan Fan: but i dont think sleep is an option until i tell you

Lan Fan: youre ridiculous

Lan Fan: youre ridiculous and full of it and infuriating and reckless and beautiful and just so so idiotic

Lan Fan: id have to be too i guess

Lan Fan: to be in love with you even after all of it

Lan Fan: and i really am just that

Lan Fan: idiotic and in love with you

Literal Monkey™: thanks

Lan Fan: did you just breakfast at tiffanys me

Literal Monkey™: yes because you would understand it

Literal Monkey™: you understand lan fan

Literal Monkey™: every shitty meme or reference or word i say you’ll always always understand

Literal Monkey™: just like how you understand that im all those things you said i was

Literal Monkey™: im reckless and infuriating and indecisive and greedy and far too ridiculous to deserve you and you understand that

Literal Monkey™: and if youre idiotic for being in love with me then im a hundred times more and you understand why too

Lan Fan: i think you have too much faith in me

Literal Monkey™: i think you have too little

Literal Monkey™: come to your window

Lan Fan: what why

Literal Monkey™: because its hard to type when im barely holding onto your window frame and looking like a hero straight out of an austen novel and honestly id rather told you how much im in love with you in person

Literal Monkey™: convention and all that

Lan Fan: well alright then

Paninya changed the chat name to IT FINALLY FUCKING HAPPENED LADS LINGFAN IS REAL FUCKING CHRIST NO MORE ANGST I AM LIBERATEDDDD

Alphonse Elric: Great so can someone pls explain wtf a lingfan is now

Edward Elric: Read at 8:09 AM

FULL VERSION AND CONTINUATION HERE

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i-amusemyself · 7 years

Note

All Emoji Asks.

🐰 what is one secret youve never told anyone?I don't really have that many secrets. I guess theres a side of my personality that I spend a lot of energy supressing like hell that I hate with a passion.💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be?Right now? My best friend right next to me or my friend back home.🐹 what are some of your favourite pokemons and why?I mean, I only ever played pokemon go, but from that I loved the squirtles and the evees just bc theyre cute af🌠 if you were in charge of the world what would it be like?A lot more chilled out. Chill pills would be mandatory.👀 what was the most recent vivid dream you had?Okay I had two freaking weird ones the other night?In one I was a 10 y/o muslim girl going to a new primary school and while I was there I started raising money for a cancer charity.In the other I was taking a really hard A level maths exam and getting stressed and mad bc everyone kept talking and I couldnt finish it in time.☀ what do you like most about your best friend?EVERYTHING?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Idk, I guess how forgiving and layed back she is. She always tries to understand and see things from your point of view.😘 talk about your crush or partnerLmao I'm alone 😂 I do have a crush but its a million miles from mutual so like, shes amazing but boi it hurts 😂💁 if someone was rude to you would you be rude back?Depends on how well I know them and what they're like tbh. I'll banter, but I avoid confrontation.🌟 what do you like about yourself? (3 things)😂😂😂 wow erm...1. I always try and put in all the energy I have if someone/something needs it2. I make loads of terrible puns its gr93. I really dont have any other qualities idk🐾 what are you scared of most? How will you overcome it?👏 I'm terrified of abandonment 👏 aaaand as of yet I have no idea how to deal with it ngl🎁 what never fails to make you happy?Really good stand up commedy or my favourite music💙 what annoys you about some people?Their complete lack of self-awareness. Idk, maybe I'm low key jealous too but srsly some people????😤 do you get angry easily?Yeah. I keep pretty good tabs on it so you probs wouldnt know it, but if something upsets me, chances are I'm hella pissed too.🐇 what do you always daydream about?Dramatic and upsetting situations or drunk situations 😂🌻 if you could change 3 things about the world what would you change?1. Sort out equality and all that jazz2. Divide up the land more equally, bc it pisses me off that some people are living in tiny cramped shacks and others have 100 mile square farms.3. End capitalism and with that make all necessary services free.🍓 send me 4 names: kiss, befriend, kill or marry?Anon?✈ what is your dream city and why?I mean Ive always wanted to go to copenhagen but theres no guarantee its gonna be my fave. My fave so far is Amsterdam bc its so peaceful and the architecture is to die for.☕ talk about your ideal day?Spend it with my best friend/crush. Lay in bed late and be lazy and watch good TV/movies. Maybe go out in the afternoon to not go stir crazy and entertain ourselves. Stay up kinda late talking about deep shit, lying underneath the stars.🌸 are you an introvert, ambivert or extrovert?Ambivert!💧 when was the last time you cried?Yesterday lmao 😂 i havent gone more than 2 days without crying in the past week 😧 I just got myself into a nice Depression Episode.🎵 name 5 songs you like atm?Argh I havent listened to music in so long (7 days...) umm so things i wanna listen to- youth by daughter- voices by Motionless in white- living dead girl by rob zombie- corpse roads by keaton hensen- lost boy by troye sivan⚡ if you had any superpower what would it be and why?Mind reading bc my anxiety would be halved.💛 if you could talk to your younger self, what would you say?I'd tell myself to stop trying to fit in and be like everybody else because the people I know are just a tiny portion of the population and really aren't much to aspire to. I'd tell myself to drop all my shitty friends because it would stop me from dealing with a lot of crap later on. I'd point myself in the right direction of the better people 😂I'd teach myself how to stand up for myself and how to not take any crap.And I'd give myself a hug and tell myself it's okay not to be cishet, because maybe if I could turn back time and start to deal with it earlier I'd be okay with it now.💚 who are you jealous of and why?A lot of people really, with qualities I don't have.I suppose one kid in particular is like, everything i want to be. Kind, hillarious, confident, close to people I love. 💎 what would you rather have more of: intelligence, beauty, kindness, wealth or bravery? Why?Bravery or kindness?? Its hard to have one without the other. Also beauty ngl bc im fugly.🙊 what are you ashamed of?My gender and sexuality 👏🌺 which languages do you know? Which do you want to learn?I know english and spanish and I'm learning Danish. Hopefully once I'm okay at danish I can learn arabic. Ill be satisfied after that 😂☘ if you could be any fictional characters friend/lover who would it be and why?I mean, theres plenty of fictional lesbians where im like 😏👀 but honestly if I had to pick only one person I'd choose Kieren Walker from in the flesh bc he needs a friend and I relate to him so strongly.☁ talk about your dream universe.Mental and physical illness doesnt exist. People arent dicks. Everything is free. No one feels unloveable.💜 which acts of kindness are you going to do today?Idk I'm p much done for the day 😂 I've been helping out around the house all day tho🐬 if you could transform into any animal what would it be and why?I mean i might be biased but either a dog or a sloth bc they get to sleep all the time 😂🍄 talk about someone/something you really dislike.Someone I was best friends with for 4 years suddenly turned around and stabbed me in the back, made up shit about me, arranged that all my friends not talk to me for a fortnight, sent group emails stuffed with emotional manipulation and blamed me for her suicidal thoughts. I nearly ended it. Now I get to watch my friends still loving her like she isn't the world's most heartless person. It makes my blood boil.😣 talk about something that has been making you depressed/angry/anxious.I'm staying with my best friend rn and I can't stand the thought of going home.🍪 what did you want to be as a kid and what do you want to be now?I wanted to be a nurse and now I wanna be a doctor 👏 variety 👏🍰 what are some of your favourite sugary foods?I cant really eat sugar 😂 so fuck knows? Chocolate?🍑 what are you obsessed with?Brains, thought processes, psychopaths, graveyards and more 😂💘 what happens to you when youre stressed?I just get really emotional and start agressively making lists everywhere in an attempt to sort my life out.😪 what are you sick of?Humanity.🙀 are you an adrenaline seeker?Yeah its terrible 😂 i hate anxiety but I also kinda love it when my heart races.💥 what are some unpopular opinions you have?I....dont? I cba with discourse lifes too short.☔ would you consider yourself a good person?I think anyone with good intentions is usually a good person so yeah😊 what do you do as hobbies?Sleep, binge watch netflix and blog 😂🎤 whats the last song you hummed or sang by yourself?👏👏👏 Mr Brightside 👏👏👏 what a jam 👏👏👏🐝 whats your worst trait?Being waaayyy too clingy.🌷 whats your mbti personality type and why do you think it suits you?ISFJ and yeah defo, its the defender and I feel that tbh🐶 send me 3 fictional people and ill choose my favourite.Anon?👑 who are your favourite celebrities and why?Kaitlyn Alexander is my bae.Besides that I dont really....obsess over any celebrities? Eliza taylor is doing p good 😂 ummm also some youtubers? Do they count?🐴 opinion on __?Its a great bit of punctuation.🍋 do you consider yourself to be an emotional person?Lmfaoooooo YES📚 share 3 books you love and your favourite quotes from them.M8. Thats not gonna happen 😂 I love any book that makes me cry but I cannot quote a single word.😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? Does it work?Find a quiet corner, shut my eyes and listen to my Depression Playlist. It doesn't always make me feel better but it helps me ride it out.🙂 what thoughts keep you going when you're sad?The thoughts of uni and that I'll hopefully meet some great new people. Also my best friend. Just in general 😂🌎 which country do you live in?England.🐧 describe yourself in 3 words?Awkward, tall and shy.🙉 what quotes changed you?"Pick your fights" bc as much as its a meme it helps me chill outAlso "everything is temporary" and "the sun will rise and we will try again".💭 do you keep a diary?I have a personal blog which acts as a diary yeah💫 who inspires you?Kaitlyn Alexander!! (Listen theyre like the first nb representation I ever knew and I relate so much to everything they say and theyre so cute and talented)👻 do you believe in ghosts and why?I mean, my initial response is no. Because we're just bags of flesh made up of cells and when we die those cells die so theres nothing to live on.But tbh we know so little about the universe I'm open to the possibility of anything at this point.🎀 whats your fashion sense like?Dior. I know what clothes I like and think look good but I never like them on me.🎬 what are some of your favourite films?Deadpool, My sisters keeper, pitch perfect 2 ermm🍦 what is one treasured childhood memory?UmmmmmmmmmmmmWhen I first got my bunny, that was an amazing day!!🐼 if you could meet anyone, who would it be and why?Um my soulmate? Where are they at?

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ofstarsandvibranium · 8 years

Text

Internet Famous: Part 6

Fandom: Star Wars (Modern AU)

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Reader

Summary: Poe and Reader are friends who came together and started a youtube channel for fun. 1 million subscribers later, they’re now internet famous. Their friendship has thrived, however, all of their fans can obviously see that Poe and Reader aren’t just friends.

Internet Famous Masterlist

After going through Jungle Cruise, Pirates of the Caribbean, Indiana Jones, and Haunted Mansion, your stomach was grumbling. Poe laughed when he heard your stomach, “Want a churro or corndog or both?”

“Both! I can’t choose between them so definitely, both!”

“Right away, your Highness!” You linked your arm with Poe’s and you made your way to the churro station right outside of the Haunted Mansion entrance. Then you made your way to The Stage Door in Frontierland for a corndog. Poe pulled out the vlogging camera again.

“And here is the beautiful Princess Y/N ready for the royal feast.”

You bit into the churro, “Dessert before lunch because why not? I’m adult! I do what I want!”

Poe then took the churro from your hand and bit into it, “Mmmm. That’s a good churro.”

“Heeeeey!” You grabbed it back. Poe set the vlogging camera, still on, onto the table. You giggled and began to wipe sugar off his face, “And you say I’m a mess.”

Poe smiled, “You are. A hot mess.”

After you two ate, Poe thought you should take a break and head back to the hotel to rest for a few hours. Then you’d head over to Disney’s California Adventure for some other rides.

You two walked back into the hotel arm in arm. As soon as you entered the room, you kicked off your shoes and ran onto the bed. You belly flopped onto the soft cushion. Poe giggled as he slapped your butt then made way to the desk. He took out his laptop and began to download the vlogging footage so there would be enough room for tonight.

You took out your own laptop to check on your subscriber count . You looked at the number and screamed, “AAAHH!! POE! COME HERE!” You exclaimed.

Poe left the desk and walked to you, “What’s up?”

“We’re almost at 1.5 million!”

“No way!” Poe sat down next to you and watched the subscriber count slowly increase.

“I gotta snapchat this!” You pulled out your phone and tapped on the app. You started filming, “Look guys! We’re almost at 1.5 million subscribers!!” You added to your story.

“Just a few more to go….YEAH! WOOHOO!” Poe exclaimed jumping from the bed, “We did it!!”

You snapchatted a picture of 1.5 million with the caption, “We did it, guys! Thank you so much!”

“Hey! Wanna livestream a Q and A?” Poe asked.

“Let’s do it!” You two immediately tweeted out that you were going to be doing a livestream Q and A as a way to celebrate. A few moments later, the livestream was up and going on youtube. The comments section immediately filled up with congrats.

“Okay, guys and gals! Send us your questions!” Poe exclaimed. You both began to read through the questions.

“Why aren’t we at Disneyland right now?” You asked then answered with, “We wanted to take a break and take a rest back here at the hotel. Don’t get us wrong, Disneyland is amazing! But it’s a bit hot out and we’ve been waiting in long lines. So ya know. Gotta rest up!”

“What are our favorite rides here? Well, Y/N, loooves The Pirates of the Caribbean.”

“And Poe looooves Space Mountain.” You read more comments and questions, “When are you and Poe getting married? Uuuuummmm...”

“Okay, quick story. Back in our first year of college, Y/N and I made a pact. That once we hit our mid thirties and we haven’t been married to someone else, we’d marry each other.”

You laughed, “Are we really gonna stick with that? I mean, come on. I’m sure you’ll pick up a girlfriend soon and then soon enough, you two will get married.”

You read comments saying that you and Poe NEEDED to get married, that you were meant for each other, blah blah blah. You tried to block out the comments because you just didn’t want to end up hurting yourself at the thought of Poe being someone else’s.

“If you were to work at Disneyland, what would you do?” Poe asked reading off a question, “Y/N and I wanna be face characters! We’d love to interact with the kids and feel like real Disney characters.”

You nodded, “Poe would make a perfect Prince Naveen, right?! He’s got the looks and voice for it! Plus, he’s a shameless flirt!”

“Yeah, but only for you.” He kissed you on the cheek and the comments section was blowing up.

Kiss her again!

AAAAHHHH!!! I’M DYING!

KISS HER ON THE LIPS!

srsly why arent you guys together?!?!

You nervously chuckled, “You guys are silly. Poe would never-” You turned to Poe and you were silenced mid-sentence. Poe’s lips were suddenly on yours. You froze for a second and then began to kiss back. You felt Poe smile against your lips. You broke apart and your face was red. You looked away from Poe, whom was smiling like the damn Cheshire Cat. You looked at the comments again:

IT HAPPENED! IT HAPPENED GUYS! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!

This is happening! You guys kissed! My poor fangirl heart cant take any more of this!

Make it official, Poe!

“So...that happened..” You said awkwardly.

“Yeah..so.......be my girlfriend?”

“Wait, really?” You were a bit surprised despite him kissing you just a few moments ago.

“Well, yeah. I don’t just kiss anyone, Y/N. You’re my best friend and I like you a lot. I’ve liked you for so long. And you kissed me back so I’m pretty sure that means you like me back.”

You shyly hid your face, “I can’t believe this is happening. LIVE TOO! But, yes, Poe. I’ll be your girlfriend.”

“YES! There you guys go! We made it official! We’re officially a couple! Tweet it, instagram it, whatever! No more headcanons of us being together cause now it’s true!”

You laughed at Poe’s ridiculousness, “Alright. Calm down.”

“No! I won’t! My best friend isn’t just my best friend anymore! She’s my girlfriend!”

You rolled your eyes, “Okay, guys. I think that’s enough for today. Keep an eye out for more tweets and snapchats of our adventures in Disneyland. See ya!” You ended the livestream and shut your laptop.

You turned to Poe again and his lips were on yours once more. You stopped him, “You really need to calm down.”

Poe shrugged, “I can’t. I’m just so happy. You make me happy!

After that, you and Poe took a nice two hour nap sleeping in each other’s arms. When you woke up, Poe was already awake staring at you, “It wasn’t a dream, was it?”

Poe shook his head, “If this is a dream. I really don’t want to wake up.”

“You’re so corny.” You pushed away from him and got up to use the bathroom. You washed your hands then fixed your hair again.

Poe watched you brush your hair as he leaned on the bathroom threshold, “You’re perfect, you know that?”

You smiled, “So you keep telling me.”

“Because it’s true.” He walked up to you and circled his arms around you, “My beautiful princess.”

You turned around and rested your hands on Poe’s chest, “My handsome prince.” You kissed Poe and he hummed.

“I don’t think I’ll get tired of your lips.”

You two finished freshening up and then looked at your phones. In a group message with you, Poe, Rey, and Finn, there were about 20+ messages. The first being a screenshot of a buzzfeed article titled “Your Favorite Youtuber Duo is Officially a Couple!”. Following the picture was Rey’s text in all caps: say

Rey: UM, WHAT?! WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL US?!

Finn: YEAH GUYS! WHAT THE HELL!

Rey: AND IT HAPPENED ON A LIVESTREAM?! SERIOUSLY!

Finn: WHY WON’T YOU GUYS ANSWER US?! ARE YOU DEAD?!

The rest of the messages were just “Hellooooo??s” and demanding you two to answer your phones or text back. Poe took the initiative to reply

Poe: Sorry, we were napping Disneyland is tiring! And yes, this is a thing.

“Kiss me.” Poe demanded.

“For what?”

“Selfie to send to them.”

You shrugged and agreed. You took a kissing selfie and sent it to them.

Rey: FINALLY! I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU GUYS!

Finn: ...so when’s the wedding? Can I be the best man?

Rey: Can I be the maid of honor?!

Y/N: OMFG! Calm down guys! We’ll talk to you when we get back from our trip! Okay?!

Rey: Okay, fine.

Finn: Yup, got it.

Y/N: Thanks. Love you guys!

You then slipped your shoes on and walked down to the lobby hand in hand with Poe. As you waited in the elevator, Poe’s hand left yours then went around your waist. He then chuckled.

“What?” You asked.

“Earlier, you said I’d be picking up a girlfriend soon. You jinxed it.”

You giggled, “I guess I did.”

Part 7

#poe dameron #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron imagine #star wars #modern au #au

133 notes · View notes

ficdirectory · 8 years

Text

Disuphere (An AU Fosters family fic) Chapter 36

CHAPTER 36

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Missing: 3 years, 7 months and 5 days

Seventh grade had been the actual worst. Josh was almost failing everything, except for art and gym where he had steady As. The only reason he wasn’t actually failing was because Dad would kill him. No joke. So he was barely passing the academic stuff, but whatever. If this was gonna be his life, what would he need an education for?

In study hall, he borrowed Alexa Chen’s phone. She reminded him of Mariana, even though, in Josh’s mind, she never aged, and was still nine. Alexa was nice and smart and sharp. Josh admired her. Pretty much everybody thought they should have a thing, but Josh wasn’t interested.

He ignored the taunts that he must be gay. (They were “sure” it must be true because of the not dating thing and his long hair - as if that meant anything - except that he was being forced to never cut his hair, and messed with so he never wanted to get close to anybody…)

Josh signed into his Facebook. (He turned 13 last month, and basically promised Dad to be His slave forever if He kept His word and let Josh get a Facebook like the rest of the world.) At home, He monitored Josh online like the CIA or some crap, but He couldn’t control whose phone he borrowed at school.

At Dad’s insistence, Josh had zero Facebook friends and his profile pic was of one of his shoes. But without Dad literally looking over his shoulder, Josh could actually search for people instead of playing Cookie Land for 20 minutes a day.

Josh typed in Stefanie Foster San Diego and found zip. Lena Adams Anchor Beach Charter School? The same nothing. (Seriously what was up with them that they weren’t on social media?) Josh glanced at the clock. Still time for one more search:

Brandon Foster San Diego Anchor Beach.

Holy shit. There he was. His profile pic shows him with some girl Josh didn’t know. He scrolled down the page, shocked. Brandon’s page had zero privacy settings - everything was set to public. There were a billion selfies of Brandon making the same face, and 12 billion pics of him and the girl. Josh’s heart sank. No pics of Moms. None of Mari. But then Josh saw the status update:

Brandon Foster

at 10:55am

Moms bday in 2 days hmu w ideas. Srsly. Desperate to stay off the shit list.

Josh swallowed. He’d forgotten it was almost Mom’s birthday. Did that make him horrible? Or realistic? (Why think about the birthday of a person you’re never gonna see again?) Still, Josh always thought of Mariana on hers. What kind of son did that make him?

Glancing at the clock, Josh saw he was down to five minutes left of study hall. So, he didn’t let himself think, just typed:

Cant go wrong w a pic of you and any sibs. Take a new one or frame an old one.

The response came in seconds:

Ok idek who you are and idc. You just saved my ass Josh Mitchell. Genius.

Not really, he thought. This many years away, and he ached for a picture of his family.

He could only imagine Stef might want the same.

Friday, October 7, 2011

Missing: 4 years and 1 month

If nobody noticed how Josh came into elementary school half-dead those couple of times...if nobody noticed the happy kid act in 6th grade was a mask...if nobody noticed his silent slide into depression last year....then why the hell should he be surprised now?

At least once a quarter some idiot pulled the fire alarm at school - either that or they were required to be sure the kids get the shit scared out of them regularly - it sure worked on Josh.) Every time, all of them had to go stand outside and wait for LAPD to show up, and say they were safe from the imaginary fire.

Every time, Josh made sure to stand at the front of the crowds of kids (so they could see his short ass) pulling back his Biblically long hair with a rubber band so his face was in plain view. It was everything he dared to do without actually screaming his other name out….which was only okay, he knew, if he had a death wish.

(With the new kid around, Josh knew He wouldn’t need much reason to just off him and be done with it. Josh couldn’t take the risk.)

Josh stood as close to the closest cop car as he could, willing the cops to make eye contact. He didn’t trust cops as far as he could throw them, but as an alternative to certain death? Josh knew he had to try.

So he walked out in front of a car preparing to move. The officer honked and yelled at him to get out of the street.

For the rest of the day, Josh’s nerves were destroyed and he had a massive headache. He didn’t do anything in class.

Let him fail.

Let him fail every damn thing.

Who would care anyway?

Level 1 was there like an old friend, and Josh stayed blank until the end of the day. No one noticed. Why would they?

Brandon’s voice tried to butt into his distant haze on Josh’s walk back to His house: “Seriously? If you fail on purpose, Moms are going to kill you.”

Josh saw the house - nothing special on the outside - and shivered: “Not if He kills me first,” he said out loud to no one.

Friday, January 6, 2012

Home: 2 months and 23 days

Walking back into Anchor Beach four years later, as an eighth grader, Jesus felt like a time machine had dropped him off. All his friends were huge. Mariana was way taller than him so they looked weird walking down the hall together. Twins, but not really twins. It bummed Jesus out.

At least the press had died down and no news people cared he was here.

“Jesus! Where you been?” a senior asked. He looked friendly enough but was the size of a California Redwood. Then he said, “Totally thought you died. You’re back, though. Awesome.”

“Shut up, Sam!” Mariana said, like Sam couldn’t snap her like a twig.

“What?” Sam said. “It’s a good thing. I mean I’m glad to see him!”

Jesus couldn’t move. His heart was about to hammer through his chest and he really felt like puking.

“Jesus? It’s okay. He’s gone,” Mariana reassured.

Blinking, he focused in, and saw they were the only ones left in the hall. He must’ve zoned out for longer than he thought.

“Mama put you in a lot of my classes, remember? And if we’re not together, and you need me? Text me.”

“Yeah…” Jesus answered. But Sam’s words were still in his head.

Classes passed in a blur and Jesus couldn’t concentrate on anything. But when anybody asked about Then, it was like Jesus had to listen:

“So, was it awful?” Lexi asked, sidling up to him in the hall like no time had passed since he was chasing her and Mariana on the playground. (Lexi’s family had just gotten back from spending winter break in Honduras. She hadn’t seen him yet, but Mariana must’ve given her a heads-up.)

Jesus shrugged. Dr. Hitchens said he could always say he wasn’t comfortable answering, but that would just give them more to gossip about.

“Yeah,” he said.

“Oh, I’m so sorry…” she said, wrapping her arms around him. She was taller, like Mariana, so her arm came around his neck and squeezed. It felt like he was choking.

He couldn’t feel his body.

Lexi didn’t let go right away. And Jesus stood there, his arms at his sides. When she pulled back, Jesus wasn’t listening.

He only came back when he smelled Mariana’s perfume - something light and flowery - she was looking concerned - offering her sweatshirt. He stared, not understanding.

“Put this around your waist, okay. So it covers you.” (Why did she look so worried?)

But then Jesus glanced down, and saw. It was just like That Day. When he was so scared in that duffel bag that he couldn’t hold it.

His ears burned.

“It’s okay. I don’t think anyone saw. Come with me. We’ll find Mama.”

“I’ll just go to the nurse?” he asked, because he did not want to show up looking like a damn toddler at Mama’s office.

Mariana hesitated. “Can I text her at least?”

Jesus didn’t even know she was asking him until she said it again.

He thought of Then. Of his fear. Of being humiliated. And then he heard Mama in his head from last month:

I don’t make fun of people. That’s not kind.

“Yeah,” Jesus nodded.

Mama took him home. Let him change. Asked if he was okay. What he needed.

“Can we just sit on the couch?” he asked.

“Sure.”

So, they sat.

Jesus inched closer and closer until he was right next to her. He laid his head on her shoulder. “I’m not sure I can do school. I might be too dumb.”

Mama paused and thought. “If you can’t go to Anchor Beach, we can figure something out. You’re not dumb, my love, you’re stressed. It makes sense.”

“Does it?” he asked.

“It does. Let’s call Dr. Hitchens. See if she’s got an earlier opening today. What do you think?”

Jesus bristled. “I don’t want to…”

Mama only spoke after another long pause. “How about we keep your 3:30 then? That way nothing has to change.”

“I guess,” he muttered. Even if Mama didn’t talk about it directly, it was still so embarrassing. “Can I tell you something? Maybe it’ll make you mad…”

“You can tell me anything.” Mama reassures.

“I really hate school.”

“I understand.” Mama said. “And I’m not mad. In fact, can I tell you something?” she echoed.

Jesus nodded.

“Sometimes I really hate school, too. It reminds me of losing you. And I hate that feeling.”

Carefully, Jesus put his arms around her, and laid his head back down on her shoulder. “I’m right here. I can’t be lost if I’m right here.”

“I love you, Jesus.”

He stiffened, but relaxed again. “Yeah,” he whispered. “I think I know that.”

#fic: disuphere #fosters fic

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partlycharlie-archive · 6 years

Text

gender? who is she? (they???)

chapter two: hey, uh . dad? link to prologue link to chapter one

summary: papa,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, oooOoOoo,,,,,,,,didn't MEAN to make you CRY (thaaaaank fuck i didn't!!!!!!!) word count: 1,796 warnings: coming out a/n: yeet yeet comin out bois

read on ao3

[SUNDAY; 10.21.18]

harry? (SumayaPotter), luna! (LunaLovegood)

[14:06] harry?: luna luna luna

[14:15] luna!: hello harry! what is it you wish to talk about?

[14:16] harry?: i think im gonna come out 2 dad

[14:19] luna!: oh wonderful! i wish you the best of luck, harry. do you know if you will come out to your mother, as well?

[14:20] harry?: oh shit [14:20] harry?: nah i dont think so [14:20] harry?: im a little more scared abt her than i am abt dad [14:20] harry?: idk y lol

[14:21] luna!: okay! that’s perfectly fine, harry. you only have to go to the limits that you are comfortable with! <3

[14:21] harry?: tyyy <3

---

“Hey, dad?”

“Yeah? What’s up, Su?” James settles into the chair across from his daughter, who is sitting (with the worst posture ever - he really needs to start reminding her to keep her back straight, even if that’s the only part of her that’ll ever be straight) slumped over the table. As he speaks, she props her head into the palm of one hand to look him in the eye.

“Do you know what the word nonbinary means?”

He raises an eyebrow and frowns, considering. “A number that’s not a power of two?” he tries, offering a cautious smile.

She snorts with a quirk of her lips. “Close, but not quite.” She starts to pull out the pins holding her hijab together, placing them in a small bag in front of her. The layers of the scarf unravel around her face.

“It, uhm, well. It kind of means someone that doesn’t feel like a girl or a boy? I guess you could say that nonbinary people are, like, in between being a girl or a boy, even though I’m pretty sure some people don’t feel like that? Like agender people, y’know? I mean, I’m pretty sure they fall under the term of ‘nonbinary’ or ‘genderqueer’ or whatever, but they don’t really have a gender? I guess? Yeah.”

She’s rambling, pulling the sleeves of her shirt down so that they wrap around her fingertips in that way she always does when she’s nervous.

Huh. She’s nervous.

He tilts his head. “That makes sense, yeah. Why bring it up? Is it part of your homework?” He can’t help but notice the way her shoulders noticeably relax when he confirms what she’s saying.

“No, but - uh. I think I might be? Nonbinary, I mean?” She curls in on herself, shoulders hunching in towards her chest as if she expects some sort of rejection. One of the layers of her hijab covers her expression.

He raises an eyebrow. “Okay, cool. What does this mean, then?” James’ tone is filled with relaxed confusion, and he watches with the tiniest of smiles as Sumaya lights up, breathing in deeply.

“Oh! Yeah, okay.” She cuts herself with a shaky hand wiping itself across her mouth. She starts fidgeting again, pulling at the strings of her scarf and rubbing the skin of her thumb and index fingers together.

“So, uh, maybe different pronouns? I can explain that to you later, hah. And- uh, I’ve been thinking about a new name, maybe? I’m not sure about it, but. Definitely a consideration.” The words fly out of her mouth like spitfire, each one landing in front of him as if she were afraid they’d burn her tongue if she didn’t speak fast enough.

“Huh. Okay. I mean - I get what pronouns are, no need to explain that, but I’m guessing you wouldn’t want to use guy pronouns-”

“He-him. That’s what you’d say.” She replies instantly; it sounds like a reflex. “Sorry.”

James smiles softly. “No need to apologize, love. He-him, okay - so you wouldn’t use that because you don’t… feel like a guy, right?”

Sumaya nods hesitantly.

“But not she-her, either, because you’re not a girl.”

Another nod.

James’ eyes flicker around the room as he considers this, and he misses the shaky breath Sumaya lets out. “Okay. So what pronouns would you use, then? Not ‘it’ or anything like that, right? Because that seems kind of, uhm. Dehumanizing.”

She laughs, just a bit, and her shoulders relax from the subconsciously hunched position they were in before. She pushes the remains of her hijab down so that they rest around her neck. “No,” she corrects with a smile. “That’s only for inanimate objects, I’m pretty sure. I would use they-them, probably.”

“Huh. That’s not… singular, though, is it? Correct me if I’m wrong, obviously, but isn’t that pronoun only used for a group of people?” She - they - laugh.

“Nah, it’s been used as a single-person pronouns since, like, the 1500’s; it just hasn’t really been recognized until recently. You can look up the timeline, it’s actually pretty cool. But, uh. Yeah.”

James scrubs his face with his hands. “Okay. It might take a little while for me to get used to it - feel free to correct me if I fuck up, pardon my French - but thanks for telling me, hun.” He smiles in a way that he hopes is reassuring, and Sumaya lets out a shuddering breath, looking vaguely like they’re about to cry.

“Whoa- whoa, what’s up, love? What’s wrong?” He leans forward in response to grasp one of Sumaya’s hands that lays, stationary, on the table. They shake their head quickly, breathing in another stuttered breath.

“No, I just. Fuck. I’m so happy, I’m sorry, I know it’s dumb, I was just so worried, god, I’m sorry, I’m just so happy,” she they ramble, using their free hand to wipe away the tears threatening to spill from their eyes.

“Aww, love, that’s okay.” He stands up, careful not to dislodge his hand from their tight grip, and walks around the table to envelop her in the tightest hug he can manage.

“I love you,” they whisper.

“I love you too.”

---

harry? (SumayaPotter), luna! (LunaLovegood)

[17:06] harry?: LUNA I DID IT OH MY GOD FUCK

[17:15] luna!: you did what, harry? [17:15] luna!: oh my goodness! congratulations, harry! i’m so proud of you, love.

[17:16] harry?: I CANT BELIEVE I DID IT SLFNEISLNFKESN FUCK [17:16] harry?: I CRIED BUT IT WAS OKAY [17:16] harry?: HES OKAY WITH IT [17:16] harry?: FUCK [17:18] harry?: fuck [17:18] harry?: hes [17:18] harry?: hes okay with it oh my god hes okay with it

[17:20] luna!: <3

everybody but sumaya [longbottom (NevilleLongbottom), parkinson (PansyParkinson), weasley_2 (GinnyWeasley), lovegood (LunaLovegood), weasley_1 (RonWeasley)…]

[17:22] lovegood: hello @everyone ! [17:22] lovegood: i would appreciate it if you all would send your congratulations to sumaya!

[17:23] weasley_1: for what ?

[17:23] lovegood: i’m afraid i can’t say, but rest assured the congratulations are deserved.

[17:23] zabini: bet

blaise (BlaiseZabini), su (SumayaPotter)

[17:23] blaise: yo congrats

[17:23] su: ????? [17:23] su: 4 wht

[17:23] blaise: idk bro just congrats

[17:24] su: ok

tinychild (GinnyWeasley), onlychild (SumayaPotter)

[17:23] tinychild: hey yo congrats on whatever just happened

[17:24] onlychild: ?????? thanks ??????????? [17:24] onlychild: wtf

[17:25] tinychild: i dont know

ibelieveicanfly (SumayaPotter), ibelieveicantouchthesky (NevilleLongbottom)

[17:23] ibelieveicantouchthesky: congratulations!

[17:24] ibelieveicanfly: what the FUCK [17:24] ibelieveicanfly: y r yall congratulating me ???????

[17:24] ibelieveicantouchthesky: i’m not sure, but i’m sure whatever you did was amazing.

[17:25] ibelieveicanfly: csdkjrhoewsdnck okay,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

motherfucker (HermioneGranger), bitchass (SumayaPotter)

[17:23] motherfucker: Hey why did Luna just ask me to congratulate you

[17:25] bitchass: IT WAS HER????? [17:25] bitchass: ofc it was that sweet hoe

luna! (LunaLovegood), harry? (SumayaPotter)

[17:26] harry?: luna

[17:28] luna!: yes, harry?

[17:28] harry?: !!!!!! [17:28] harry?: sry forgot abt that 4 a sec

[17:28] luna!: no need to apologize, harry!

[17:28] harry?: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [17:28] harry?: okay im fine [17:28] harry?: anyway [17:29] harry?: did u ask all of our friends to congratulate me

[17:29] luna!: yes! [17:29] luna!: even if they don’t know why they are congratulating you, i thought it would still be a nice feeling to have them be proud of you. [17:29] luna!: also, it is a nice demonstration of their trust in both me and you, harry. [17:29] luna!: me, because they trusted me enough to know that i was not lying! [17:30] luna!: and you, because i’m sure most of them said something along the lines of “i’m sure whatever you did was worthy of my praise” when you inevitably asked them why they were congratulating you for seemingly no good reason!

[17:31] harry?: omg [17:31] harry?: ilysm [17:31] harry?: god ur fuckin right too jfc [17:31] harry?: u absolute blessing u [17:31] harry?: srsly tho thank you luna tht was rly nice of u

[17:31] luna!: of course! [17:32] luna!: i love you too, harry. <3

---

the Tea TM [f (FredWeasley), g (GeorgeWeasley), s (SumayaPotter)]

[17:25] f: hey broski [17:25] g: hey . hey . hey .

[17:33] s: what

[17:33] g: congrats [17:33] f: also y is everyone congratulating u

[17:34] s: oh [17:34] s: luna told them to

[17:34] g: y tho

[17:34] s: i came out to my dad

[17:34] f: ?

[17:35] s: wait shit

[17:35] g: ur gay?

[17:35] s: no [17:35] s: kinda [17:35] s: its weird [17:35] s: thats not what i told him

[17:35] f: oh [17:35] g: whatd u tell him

[17:36] s: um [17:36] s: shit okay ig im doing this

[17:38] f: no pressure [17:38] g: NOSE pressure

[17:38] s: shut up [17:40] s: do u k what nonbinary means

[17:41] f: oh bet [17:41] g: yea man [17:41] f: uk charlies trans right??

[17:43] s: w h a t

[17:43] g: ya [17:43] f: well agender rly but ye [17:43] g: we all read up on a bunch of gender stuff when he came out [17:43] f: p legit [17:43] g: u got a new name or r u sticking w su

[17:43] s: god thats so wild [17:44] s: oh uh no [17:44] s: uh [17:44] s: harry i think [17:44] s: idk

[f (FredWeasley) changed s (SumayaPotter)’s name to h] [g (GeorgeWeasley) changed h (SumayaPotter)’s name to h]

[17:44] g: goddamnit fred [17:44] f: ;)

[17:46] h: welp

[g (GeorgeWeasley) changed chat name to ‘ mlk but better’]

[17:46] g: get it [17:46] g: bc our names go fgh [17:46] g: and mlk was mlk

[17:46] h: pls stop

#partlycharlie #my fic #hp #g?wis?(t???)#lmao can that be my tag for this #yeehaw

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