#i’m gonna add alt text when i get a chance | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rizahawkais · 4 years

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Hi Nia! You're gifs are so pretty! Is it possible for you to show how you get your WandaVision gifs too look so clear and hd? And how do you do your colorings too? (specifically the wanda maximoff in episode 3 gifset ITS GORGEOUS) I'm new to giffing and all the tutorials are kind of old. It's okay if you don't want to though! I understand it may be time consuming.

omg no! never feel intimidated to ask!! i don’t mind at all!

so, i’m going to show you how i made and coloured this gif

mostly bc it’s the only gif in that set w text and i’m going to share my text settings too!

tutorial is below :)

WHAT KIND OF VIDEOS ARE BEST?

.mkv files (the bigger the better BUT i usually think anything above 5 gb is excessive and unnecessary for an episode of television BUT for a movie worth it) itunes downloads (logolesspro on twitter, hd-source on tumblr, live-action-raws on tumblr have some DEPENDING on what you’re looking for) (also, there’s a chance that if you search "show/movie hd download tumblr” you’ll find a tumblr with its itunes download available)

THAT IS IT NO OTHER TYPE OF FILES MAKE YOUR GIFS LOOK GOOD

- my suggestion is always if its new (like just came out the past month) t*rrent it! it’ll be downloaded quickly and .mkv files look the best! BUT if not check the sources above see who has the BIGGEST file if they even have what you’re looking for and then if not then you look to t*rrenting!!

here are the wandavision files i use so you can see!!

SCREENCAPPING

-if you have windows use potplayer! i have a mac so i can’t show you how to use it and it’s not available for me :( HOWEVER back when i had a windows potplayer was the best method in screencapping!!

-I HAVE A MAC! so i use mpv!! (go to mpv.io and follow the directions) BUT DON’T DOWNLOAD THE LATEST ONE (it has a bug that skips frames) try each before the latest one bc from what i heard different ones work differently for everyone!! and i don’t know which one i use (yikes!) THERE ISN’T THAT MANY I PROMISE AND IT’S WORTH IT BC MPV IS THE BEST (i used to use adapter but they didn’t take impressive screencaps in my opinion and it was evident in my gifs you can see it too! )

create a folder for your screencaps! and make sure to rmb the directory order! now we want to create a text file on our built in textedit app on mac! type up all this down below (i like jpg but you can replace jpg w png if you want) AND SAVE THE FILE AS mpv.conf THIS IS IMPORTANT SO DON’T FORGET IT! save it somewhere you’ll find easily and NEVER delete it until you don’t use mpv anymore

just in case you don’t know what to insert after, go to your screencaps folder

now you want to open mpv and go to the corner towards mpv -> preferences and they’ll tell you that there is no .conf file SO GO LOOK FOR THE TEXT FILE WE JUST MADE AND DRAG IT TO THE FOLDER THEY OPENED FOR US AFTER SAYING THERE IS NO .CONF FILE

(i learned all this from @kylos tutorial!! so if any of what i just said about setting up mpv makes NO SENSE to you check out their tutorial at kylos(.)tumblr(.)com/post/178497909311)

now we can screencap!

so let’s find the scene we want RIGHT BEFORE and MAKE SURE SUBTITLES ARE OFF

i pause and then press (option/alt + s) and then SCREENCAPS ARE BEING TAKEN!! and to end the screencaps being taken you once again press (option/alt + s)!!

now we want to delete the excess frames! and put it all into one folder!! DO NOT DELETE FRAMES IN THE MIDDLE OF WHAT YOU WANT TO GIF!! WHEN YOU SKIP FRAMES IT WILL BE NOTICEABLE!!

MAKING THE GIF

this method isn’t used that much BUT I LOVE IT so this is how i put my frames in! first i check to see the size of my frames: 1920 x 1080

so i create a NEW file on photoshop with those dimensions w these settings

now i set my tool on photoshop to path selection tool bc if you have it set on smth like move tool or crop tool at the end you might end up moving or cropping frames you don’t want to!

ok so now we select ALL our frames and drag it on top of our new file on photoshop and the MOMENT we see our first frame in photoshop JUST KEEP CLICKING ENTER until all the frames are loaded!!

you can do file -> scripts -> load files into stack but it is WAYYY slower in my opinion!

now i crop out the excess BUT i don’t resize the gif yet! the dimensions wandavision is filmed in is 4:3 so i go to crop and set the settings to this:

MAKE SURE IT’S ON RATIO SO WE’RE PRESERVING THE ORIGINAL SIZE JUST CUTTING OFF THE BLACK EDGES!! We are going from 1920 x 1080 to 1440 x 1080 this is the dimensions after i cropped

WE ARE KEEPING THE QUALITY BY NOT CHANGING THE DIMENSIONS OF ANYTHING INSIDE !!

now we want to go to actions and create an action!! open up actions w one of these two depending on what your dash looks like!!

so we create an action with this button on the bottom of actions and we’re gonna title it making a gif and hit record!!

NOW LET’S GOOOOO!!

1. make sure you have timeline on your dash!

2. create frame animation (if you see create video timeline just click the arrow next to the button to see your other option which is frame animation!!)

3. now let’s meet our best friend!! the little bar in the top right corner that has all the commands for making our gifs and MAKE FRAMES FROM LAYERS

4. WE HAVE TO SHARPEN OUR GIFS NOW BUT TO DO THAT WE NEED TO CONVERT TO A SMART OBJECT SO NOW WE ARE GOING TO CONVERT TO VIDEO TIMELINE there are two ways: the button in the bottom left corner or the button in the top right corner w all the other commands!

5. select -> all layers DON’T MANUALLY SELECT THEM ALL BC THE ACTION WILL ONLY SELECT THAT SAME NUMBER OF FRAMES SO IF THERE ARE MORE FRAMES YOU WON’T GET THEM IN THE SMART OBJECT!!

6. filter -> convert for smart filters

7. NOW WE SHARPEN!! (filter -> sharpen -> smart sharpen) i sharpen twice!! first, make sure we are on legacy w more accurate and remove gaussian blue! the first sharpening will be 500% with 0.4 px radius. NOW SHARPEN AGAIN (filter -> sharpen -> smart sharpen) also w legacy, more accurate and remove gaussian blur BUT this time 10% with a 10.0 px radius!

8. it’s hd now!! so let’s flatten frames into clips!! go to the top right magic button again!! and you should see a pop up saying layers are being made

9. now we convert back to frame animation w either the bottom left button or our magic top right command center!

10. make frames from layers

11. select all frames w our magic command button

12. set the animation delay to 0.05 THAT IS THE BEST ONE ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS only use 0.06 when the character is moving really fast in the video itself and it makes the gif itself look awkward BUT NEVER GO ABOVE 0.06 it’ll look slow and laggy and we don’t want that and don’t go below 0.05 bc then it’ll be tooo fast and we don’t want that either!

13. now delete the very first frame on the timeline bc it is an oversharpened duplicate of the second frame! end the recording w this button!

this is what your action should look like expanded! if you made mistakes on the way and it shows up you can just click the specific step and press the trash can on the action tab to delete in from the order!!

NOW AFTER LOADING YOUR FRAMES AND CROPPING THE EDGES OF YOUR FRAMES IF YOU NEED TO JUST PLAY THE ACTION AND THEN YOUR GIF WILL BE MADE FOR YOU!!!!

now i delete some unnecessary frames in the beginning and end and this is what my gif looks like (the size was 46 mb and the limit is 10 mb so the dimensions of the gif are 540 x 405 to get it to 5 mb BUT I HAVEN’T CROPPED IT YET SO THIS IS ME CROPPING JUST TO SHOW YOU WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE)

CROPPING THE GIF

in my opinion if you want your gif to look hd you shouldn’t crop before you sharpen!! i believe that if you crop before you sharpen you don’t allow photoshop to sharpen all the pixels whereas if you crop beforehand there is less to work with!!

dimensions is all up to you!! just make sure to go by tumblr rules!! 540 is the max width and if you want to make two gifs per row then my suggested width is 268 and for three gifs per row my suggested is 177 px! Just have the right width and the length can be whatever you want!!

now i’m going to crop my gif to 540 by 590!!

NOW THIS IS WHAT MY GIF LOOKS LIKE!

COLOURING BASICS

let me show you the best adjustment tools in my opinion and a brief explanation for what they do!!

brightness/contrast: pretty simple increase/decrease the brightness/contrast BUT one of my techniques for when i first start colouring a gif is i select all my frames and do nothing to the settings of the adjustment but i set the layer to screen LIKE THIS

curves: ik others use curves to change brightness/contrast w the squiggly thing BUT i like it to set a white point and black point, this is also a technique i use when i first start colouring a gif when screen doesn’t look good for me SO you use white point to select a pixel on the gif to set as the lightest color on the gif (setting the white point) and you use black point to select a pixel on the gif to set as the darkest colour on the gif (setting the black point) usually the white point makes it TOO bright and that’s why we use the black point to counter it and same goes for when i use screen with brightness/contrast, it gets too bright so i use black point to counter it below is the button for white point and the button for black point, respectively they are shaped as color picker tools

vibrance: generally, i never use this except for color p*rn sets but they work really well in making colors seem more strong

hue/saturation: like vibrance, i never use this except for color p*rn sets but this adjustment is to help change the colors or hue of a color for example: turn blue into purple or turn a blue into a little lighter shade of blue

color balance: I ALWAYS USE THIS!! except for in black and white gifs BUT THIS IS MY GO TO AND IF I DON’T USE IT MY GIFS ARE JUST BLAND i feel like color balance is what essentially balances the colors on your gif and adds dimension to it, it makes your gif go from looking way too yellow to a more golden neutral look and it is an essential adjustment in my opinion

channel mixer: i rarely use channel mixer BUT it is so so useful when you are working w a dark scene just play w the settings and all of a sudden all the blue in a dark scene will be a little more yellow and red and your scene will kind of just look brighter and more visible

selective color: THIS IS ALSO AN ESSENTIAL this helps SPECIFIC colors pop you’re working on a scene where there is too much red on someones face you use this tool to remove the magentaness from the yellow section OR when you feel someones face is TOO yellow and needs more blush you add more magenta in the yellow section of selective color

gradiant map: gradiant map is perfect when you’re lazy if you feel like your gif looks more neutral and you want some red in it but you don’t want to mess with any other adjustments just set a red to black gradiant on soft overlay with a very low opacity and BOOM slightly red but not too much red added!

NOW TO COLOR THE GIF!

today i have decided to start with a brightness layer set on screen

and this is what we got!

now that’s a little to bright and washed out in my opinion SOOOO to counteract it, i’m going to use my black point tool in curves and i’m going to select this point on the gif (it’s better to choose smth in the background and not smth that’s paid attention to such as monica’s hair or either of their eyelashes)

now my gif looks like this! the base color is complete!

now i think i need to balance all this yellow and red! SOOOO WE GONNA USE COLOR BALANCE!!

i think the best way to use color balance is to keep swinging the balancer until you see what you like and then keep going midtones i think i want more red and i don’t want a cyan midtone and then for shadows i think i want more cyan to counter the redness of the gif but highlights i don’t touch that much NOW HERE ARE MY SETTINGS SO YOU CAN SEE

and this is what my gif looks like

now you can stop here if you want but in my opinion i think the gif looks a lil too dead still SO IMMA USE SELECTIVE COLOR

i think there needs to be a lot lot more RED so i amp up the yellow magenta and black in the red! but i also think the yellows need to be LESS RED so i remove magenta from the yellow! and bc there’s some cyan and blue bc of monica and the flowers in the background im going to make the cyans more cyan and the blues a lil more black! i’m going to remove some yellows from the magenta!! and i add more black to the neutrals and black!! i think it’s always important to add more black to neutral and black bc it adds more depth to the gif by not just making it a bunch of bright colors and having dark colors to contrast to!! my settings are below!

and the result!

now let’s see everything together!

and the before and after!

I HOPE MY COLOURING EXPLANATION MADE SENSE!! if not you can always ask me more questions i don’t mind!!

ADDING SUBTITLES

we want to grab the text tool!

make a text box from anywhere in the middle from the left to right edge. this is so we can make sure our text is centered and will be in the same place for when we have sets w more than one gif w text!

type your text out and make sure you highlight the whole text so that all the settings apply to EACH character! you can find the alignments (for center) in the paragraph tab!

now lets right click on the text layer and go to blending options! add stroke and drop shadow!

now drag it to the desired height you would like and make sure to keep it in mind for when you have more than one subtitled gif in a set!

NOW TO MAKE SURE THE TEXT STAYS IN PLACE AND THE BLENDING STAYS YOU HAVE TO CONVERT TO SMART OBJECT!!

if you want to only have the text applied to certain frames instead of all frames, select the frames you don’t want by clicking the first frame in ur don’t want section ON THE TIMELINE and WHILST HOLDING SHIFT click the last frame of ur don’t want section and then toggle the eye switch next to the text layer

now you see the text

now you don’t

tip: use opacity to fade the text in and out!

the text is going to be on all my frames so i don’t need to toggle the eye but i just wanted to show you just in case!!

now here’s my FINAL RESULT

save for web (file -> export -> save for web)

your gifs have to always be under 10 mb! so, if your WAYYY overboard YOU HAVE TO DELETE FRAMES! or you can divide the gif in two and have two gifs instead of one! however, if you plan on going the deleting frames route MAKE SURE YOU DELETE FROM THE BEGINNING OR END OF YOUR SELECTION i promise you that most of us won’t notice that your characters dialogue is being cut off BUT WE WILL NOTICE IF FRAMES ARE BEING SKIPPED so, don’t delete frames in the middle of ur gif!! idc how little you do it IT WILL RUIN YOUR GIF AND I SAY THIS FROM EXPERIENCE i would delete every fifth frame to cut down my gifs and that may seem like not that big of a deal BUT IT IS my gif looked choppy and poor so it is way better to cut from the end/beginning of the gif

ANOTHER LAST PIECE OF ADVICE in the bottom left of when the save for web menu shows up THERE’S A PREVIEW BUTTON click on it! it’ll show you your gif on your default browser and show you what it’ll look like once uploaded! this is perfect to check the speed of ur gif and the colouring and to notice if there’s a problem with your subtitles or maybe there’s an obvious jump in frames you never noticed before!! i always use preview bc the built-in photoshop viewer of ur gif shows the colors differently and the speed is NEVER ACURRATE!

I USED THESE SAVE SETTINGS!! many say to use selective pattern but i DISAGREE and i think these save settings are the ✨ best ✨

OK NOW THAT IS THE END OF THIS VERY LONG GIF TUTORIAL!! I HOPE THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED!! IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK I SINCERELY DON’T MIND!! JUST DON’T BE RUDE OR ANYTHING BC PPL HAVE BEEN RECENTLY :(

I WISH YOU ALL THE LUCK AND FUN IN YOUR GIFFING ADVENTURES !!

#tutorials #asks #sourceblog #allresources #completeresources #itsphotoshop #dailyresources #resourcemarket #chaoticresources #onlyresources #hisources #sibylresources #dailypsd

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set-phasers-to-whump · 4 years

Text

gunpoint

prompt: gunpoint (alt no.9)

whumpee: malcolm bright

fandom: prodigal son

hey hi hello! back with some malcolm whump :) hope you enjoy! i wrote this as pre-brightwell but you can read them however you like :)

Malcolm stands outside the suspect’s apartment building, debating over whether or not he should text someone to let them know where he is. On one hand, if he gets into trouble, they’ll know where to find him, but on the other hand, if he tells them what he’s doing they might come and stop him from doing it.

It’s quite the dilemma, one which is solved by a text arriving from Dani: what are u doing tonight?

You can’t tell anyone

Do I really want to know?

I’m at Paulsen’s apartment building

His phone rings, and he answers it quickly to avoid the noise attracting attention.

“You’re at the suspect’s apartment?”

“I’m not inside yet.” He steps into the building behind a man that’s just come in, and asks him to hold the elevator as he hurries across the lobby. “Now I am,” he tells Dani, pressing the button for the fifteenth floor.

“You’re in - Malcolm,” Dani says. “You’re inside?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“Don’t do anything too stupid. I’m coming. Give me ten minutes.”

“You really don’t have to -”

She hangs up before he can finish his sentence. The elevator reaches the fifteenth floor, doors sweeping open with a ding.

Malcolm steps out, taking a look around. This is the floor below where their suspect lives, but he’d gotten a weird feeling when they’d first come here to check the place out - apart from being the home of the suspect, the building had also been home to two of the three people who had been killed in the past five days. When they’d come asking about the murders, their suspect had been casual, unbothered, and entirely too welcoming given that two of his neighbors had just been brutally murdered.

They’d done more digging on the man, and Malcolm had completed a profile, and all evidence pointed to him having done it. But it wasn’t enough, Malcolm knew - he could tell that there was something they weren’t seeing, something missing, and he was willing to bet it was in this apartment building.

Hence why he’s here now, walking up and down the halls of the fifteenth floor, looking for something that he has no idea how to find.

Maybe something like a utility closet? he wonders, approaching a wooden door with a sign proclaiming it off-limits to tenants. It’s older than the rest of the doors on the floor, and it creaks ominously when Malcolm opens it.

There’s nothing there. A bucket. A circuit board. A water heater. A vent in the ceiling.

This seems like a room that should be kept locked, he thinks, turning on his phone’s flashlight and peering behind the water heater. A simple sign isn’t enough to keep everyone out, and he doubts building management wants people to have access to the floor’s electricity.

He heads back to the door to examine its doorknob, which does have a keyhole, as well as a chain lock on the inside. The keyhole is fairly scraped up with regular use, but the chain lock looks new. Malcolm wonders who might have a key, and who might have the motivation to install a secondary, interior, lock.

He pulls the door shut and turns back to the room, thoughts shifting away from who has access to this place? to who wants access to this place? He can’t imagine a utility person would need a chain lock, and thinks there must be a reason for it to have been installed.

Malcolm looks around, and his eyes land on the ceiling vent. It’s an average size, too small to fit a person through, but the right size for fitting smaller things through - murder weapons, for example. Among thousands of other things. But it’s an idea, anyway, so Malcolm grabs a small stepladder and places it beneath the vent, shining his flashlight up at it to get a better look.

It seems to open into the floor of a room above him, but from what Malcolm can see through the metal, it’s not another closet. In fact, he thinks, it might be an apartment. He does some mental gymnastics and works out that it’s perfectly possible for the apartment above him to belong to their suspect.

He turns on his phone to call Dani back and tell her his thoughts.

“I’m almost in the parking lot,” she says, before he has a chance to say anything. “Where are you right now?”

“I’m in a utility closet on the fifteenth floor,” Malcolm replies, “and I think I might have found something.”

“What kind of something?”

“Uhh...it might be nothing. But there’s this vent in here, and I think it might open into Paulsen’s apartment.”

“...And?”

“That’s all I’ve got,” Malcolm admits. “Maybe you can come have a look for yourself, see what you think.”

“I’ll be there in a couple minutes.”

Malcolm figures it’s best to stay where he is and wait for Dani to come. While he waits, he busies himself with again looking up through the vent, standing on his tiptoes on the ladder to get a better view.

The door to the closet opens with a loud, startling squeak, and Malcolm nearly falls off the ladder. “Dani,” he says, stepping down and turning around. “You scared me.”

His eyes fall on the person in the doorway - who is definitely not Dani.

“You’re...not Dani.”

Their suspect, Paulsen, smiles. “No, I am not,” he agrees, stepping into the room and pulling the door shut behind him. He slides the chain lock closed and switches off the lights.

“Give me your phone,” he instructs Malcolm, holding out a hand in the light of the phone’s flashlight.

“Why?”

Paulsen draws a gun from his jacket, turns off the safety, and aims it at Malcolm’s chest. “Because if you don’t, I’ll shoot you.”

Malcolm complies, handing over the phone. Paulsen turns off its flashlight, then throws it to the ground, smashing it under his foot.

“Guess I have to get a new phone now,” Malcolm complains, not terribly anxious about the whole having-a-gun-pointed-at-him thing. “I might have to see about buying a stronger one, though.”

“Shut up,” Paulsen fairly growls, stepping closer to Malcolm, until Malcolm can physically feel him standing there. He imagines the gun, aimed straight at him in the dark.

“What’s the plan here?” Malcolm whispers. “Are you really going to kill me?”

The cold metal barrel of the gun presses against his forehead. “Shut. Up.”

He shuts up. He doesn’t want to get shot. Especially not in the head.

“Now listen to me,” Paulsen says, and he’s close enough that Malcolm can feel his breath on his face. “Here’s what’s going to happen. Are you here alone?”

Malcolm nods, forehead scraping against the gun.

“Good. You’re going to leave this closet. I’ll be right behind you, so don’t think about trying anything dumb, okay?”

Malcolm nods again, swallowing hard. He can’t decide whether he wishes Dani would show up now or not.

“We’re going to walk out of here, nice and easy, down the hall, to the elevator, through the lobby. Got that?”

He nods a third time, hand starting to shake. He balls it into a fist.

“Then we are going to get into my car. I’ll drive, but this gun isn’t going to go away. You even think about running, and I’ll shoot you. Is all that clear?”

Another nod. He really doesn’t want to get into a car with this guy, but he very much believes what he’s saying. Plus, it might be a good way to understand him a little more, add information to his profile for his inevitable arrest. Which will come, Malcolm knows. Hopefully it comes before he gets shot.

They step out into the hallway, Malcolm first, the gun pressed into his back, digging into the skin with every step he takes. He feels his breath start to catch in his throat, feels his hands start to shake more, and tries desperately to stop the feeling of fear coursing through him. He’ll be fine. He’ll get out of this.

They round a corner, the elevators in sight. Just then, one of them opens, and Paulsen drags Malcolm back around the corner, pressing the gun to the back of his head. Malcolm gets the message well enough and keeps his mouth shut.

Footsteps draw near, and Paulsen curses under his breath. Malcolm’s heart is pounding now, and he has this terrible feeling that something really bad is about to happen.

Paulsen pulls him backwards as the steps get closer, backing them down the hall, putting the gun again to Malcolm’s back, and kind of leaning against him, casually, as if to disguise the presence of the gun.

The person rounds the corner, and even in the dim light, Malcolm can tell it’s Dani. She’s looking at her phone, muttering to herself, but she looks up about when she’s about halfway to Malcolm, and he sees her eyes widen in surprise.

“Bright?”

The gun presses harder still into his back. “Hey, Dani, what’s up?” he calls out, aiming for casual but failing spectacularly.

“What’s going on?”

“Who is that?” Paulsen hisses into Malcolm’s ear.

“Colleague,” Malcolm replies, eyes trained on Dani, who is watching their conversation with a look of understanding on her face.

“Make her leave,” Paulsen instructs, and Malcolm imagines his finger tightening on the trigger.

“Do you think you could maybe turn around?” he asks, trying to ignore the slight shaking of his own voice. “Just leave. Get back to the elevator, down to the lobby…”

Dani shakes her head minutely. “That’s not gonna happen,” she says, her words not directed at Malcolm. “Let him go.”

“No,” Paulsen replies, and his voice is strong, unafraid. Malcolm doesn’t like that. It’s in line with his profile of the man, which he is at this moment really wishing he’d been wrong about. The guy is ruthless, but collected, meticulous...Malcolm has a feeling that he might very well be dying tonight.

He doesn’t want to die tonight. He really doesn’t. He has to do something.

He pushes himself forwards, feeling the metal of the gun leave his back, and runs, shouting at Dani to run, too. He sees her draw her gun, hears a shot, and another, feels something hit his shoulder, sending him spinning off balance. He hits the ground with the terrible realization that he doesn’t know whose gun had gone off. Who might be hurt.

He lies there in horrible uncertainty for a couple terrible seconds, his head spinning. His shoulder feels like he’s been punched, but he knows he’s been shot. And maybe Dani has been shot, too…

He stumbles to his feet, overcome for a moment with dizziness. When his vision clears, he sees Dani on the floor, kneeling over Paulsen, cuffing him. He’s bleeding from his leg, where, evidently, Dani had shot him.

Malcolm watches silently as Dani wrestles the man to his feet and drags him along, phone to her ear, no doubt talking to Gil. She walks up to Malcolm, who instinctively backs away at the close presence of Paulsen.

“You okay?” she asks, and Malcolm can only nod. He’s not, though. He’s been shot, and he’s pretty sure it’s not serious, but he’s been shot, and for a long time he’d thought that he was going to be shot, and there had been the cold, unforgiving metal of the gun pressed to his skin to remind him of that fact, and he imagines the feeling is going to stick with him for quite some time, and his hands are shaking again and he can smell the metallic scent of his own blood, and he is overall definitely not okay. But he follows Dani and Paulsen into the elevator anyway, pressing a trembling hand to the wound on his shoulder, which, he can feel, is fortunately only a graze.

“Buses should be here any minute,” Dani says, as the group of three leave the building. “You gonna be okay til then?”

Malcolm nods again, sitting down heavily on the building’s concrete stoop. He watches Dani drag Paulsen along to stand on the curb, glad he’s farther away now. She looks down the street anxiously, and he sees her relax when the red and blue lights of police cars approach.

Malcolm feels himself relax at their presence, too, sinking his body further into the cold concrete. It’s going to be fine, he reminds himself, watching Dani hand over Paulsen to another officer. He knows it’s going to be fine.

His body doesn’t seem to care about what his brain knows, though. He’s still shaking, not just his hands, now, but the rest of him, too. He’s breathing too heavily, and he can’t stop feeling a gun pressing into his back, is hyperaware of the blood slowly dripping down his shoulder despite his hand trying to hold it back.

Dani sinks down on the step next to him and touches a hand to his arm. He startles, jerking away from her and hating himself for it.

“Hey, it’s okay,” she says reassuringly. “Paulsen’s in custody and the ambulances are less than a minute out.”

He can’t bring himself to nod this time. He feels a shaky breath catch in his throat, and before he can stop himself there are tears pooling in his eyes.

He sniffs and tries to make them go away, but it’s no use. His vision blurs up, swirling together the colors of the flashing lights around him.

“Can I touch you?” Dani asks, and he finds he would actually really like that now, so he does nod this time, and then her arm is around him, very gentle and mindful of the gunshot wound on his left shoulder. Her hand touches his back, right where the gun had been, but feeling nothing at all like the gun had.

“You’re shaking,” she points out, and carefully tugs him closer. “You cold?”

He shrugs with his right shoulder. “Not really. Just some lingering terror, I guess. Stupid.”

“Hey,” Dani says, her voice serious. “It’s not stupid to be scared. He had you at gunpoint, Malcolm. He shot you.”

“Ambulance’s here,” an officer Malcolm isn’t familiar with interrupts their conversation. “So’s Lieutenant Arroyo.”

With that information, Dani stands up, grabbing Malcolm’s right bicep and gently hauling him to his feet so he doesn’t have to let go of his shoulder. He lets her guide him to the ambulance, tears still clouding his vision. He sinks down onto a stretcher and sees Dani mouth meet you at the hospital. He nods in acknowledgement as two paramedics hover over him, asking him questions he has no idea how to answer.

“Just get moving,” he hears a wonderfully familiar voice say. “I’ll give you as much information as I’ve got, but let’s not waste time here.”

“Yes, sir,” says one of the paramedics, and with that, the ambulance doors shut and the engine starts.

“Gil,” Malcolm says, locking eyes with him from across the ambulance.

“Hey, kid,” Gil says, with a tight smile. “How you doing?”

“Not so good,” Malcolm replies, honestly. “Hurts.” In all honesty, it doesn't hurt that much, but saying it hurts is easier than explaining that he’s still scared, despite the fact that the threat has been completely removed, despite the fact that he knows he’s safe.

“I know,” Gil says, reaching out a hand and grabbing Malcolm’s bloody one. “But it’s going to be okay.”

“I know.”

“Everything is going to be okay, you understand?”

“I know.”

“Good. But don’t you think you’re off the hook for this either. We will be having a talk as soon as we get you fixed up.”

“Okay.”

They arrive at the hospital a moment later, and Malcolm’s hand frantically reaches for Gil’s when he’s pulled away.

“I’ll be right here when you wake up,” he hears Gil promise, as Malcolm is pushed through a set of doors. “We’ll be right here.”

They’ll be there for him...Gil, Dani, probably Ainsley, and his mother, maybe JT, Edrisa...the thought is enough to make Malcolm almost smile. Maybe he really is going to be okay.

thanks so much for reading this!!! i have done a lot of other writing today so this might not be like. the best. but i did have a fun time writing it! hope you liked it!

#febuwhump2021 #febuwhumpday20 #gunpoint #prodigal son #malcolm bright #at gunpoint #shot #fear #my writing #i say things

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bladekindeyewear · 4 years

Text

HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2020-08-06

♪ HS2 HS2 is baaaaack ♪

♪ HS2bloggin here we gooooo ♪

♪ Structural changes on their team but I don’t caaaaare ♪

♪ Already resooolved myself that its NOOOT gonna beee as good ♪ with inattentiveness to details characters like Terezi forgetting-what-they-used-to-know and an obsession with dwelling on traaageeeDEEE without relief-or-considering how weee’d feeeeeeel~ ♪♪♪ --so just gonna enjoy-what-i-caaaaaan about iiit~ ♪♪♪

Okay time for bankruptcy

> CHAPTER 11. History's Most Notorious Haters

Let’s see how effectively my perky new lowered-expectations attitude lets me enjoy this comic *click*

wut

Oh. so is this Dave drawing comics about current events or Regular Calliope doing so for our very first lanky look at her presumably-grown-up-more cherub form

> Knight: Keep it real.

HOLY SHIT IT’S DAVEBOT AND ARADIA

so we just get to SEE them?! just like that??? no buildup or anything? :D

Okay I’m marking out a little that’s a good sign. Also what a nerdy cop-out to turn the roboteyes into glasses that’s barely passable which is perfect, the rest of his outfit looks pretty cool tho

DAVEBOT: and thats reason four hundred nineteen why despite my mans many accomplishments i will never acknowledge big skateboardings contrived message that tony hawk is the quintessential skater of our generation ARADIA: o_o DAVEBOT: not in these trying times

Good to see Ultimate Dave is being true to form with regards to the core of his personality

DAVEBOT: beep boop ARADIA: i have told you several times that i was a robot before and i know for a fact you dont have to say beep boop DAVEBOT: hm that sounds fake does not compute ARADIA: david DAVEBOT: mom

I was with this conversation until the last two lines what the fuck

(I’m reading into it aren’t I, Aradia was trying to be atypically proper -- even though she wouldn’t have the frame of reference to know without being specifically told that “Dave” was considered nickname shorthand for the human name David, and thus if she DID know there’s no reason she’d use it except to troll him -- and Dave’s just mocking her response. Without any shame about his continued weirdness of calling people Mom, and by without any shame I mean he made the choice EXPLICITLY to intentionally evoke the awkwardness. Wow I got a lot out of two lines.)

(Oh, also alt!Callie’s true Jade-body incarnation here probably prompted her to start using “David” by example. There, various mysteries solved via a pile of assumptions probably to be disproven in the next couple lines I read.)

The Knight and the Maid stare at each other briefly, having exchanged enough meaningful glances over their time together to know when to drop it.

Would Time players have an easier time gelling this way, like this particular smoothness? Dropping it just before it gets weird or excessively irritating?

(Overclasspecting)

ARADIA: i think we have exchanged enough meaningful glances over our time together to know when to drop this DAVEBOT: what i enjoy about our conversations is that you just say things like that

OKAY I SNRK’D AT THAT. That was funny.

Initially. And now I’m concerned whether Aradia is being controlled by the narrative-speak, or whether they’re both just humorously referencing the meta-text they can both see, or--

ARADIA: oh is that what you enjoy ARADIA: well we are both an infinite number of years old living countless lifetimes at once but thats no reason to waste any of our...

WHAT??!? She’s an Ultimate Self too?!?

Um, okay! Yeah! So they’re BOTH just riffing on the narrative then. But... why would Dave need a robot body to accommodate his Ultimate Psyche without getting sick but Rose not need it? I can understand Dirk not needing it because the merging of the full breadth of his multiversal individuality gels well with him being a God of the aspect governing the power of his multiversal individuality, but Aradia?

Were the robot bodies not necessary after all, and the sickness Rose suffered and Obama thought Dave would have suffered some sort of ruse? Are there shenanigans afoot? (Or are we going with the “troll biology is better” cop-out?)

She knows how this will play out, having undoubtedly tried this joke on her friend in some timeline or another. Their rapport reflects a unique combination of their matching aspects but greatly differing classes. One a passive but powerful servant to time, the other wielding the aspect like a honed blade.

WHAT????

PASSIVE SERVANT OF THE ASPECT?!? WHAT THE FUCK

Okay if that means anything like it sounds like I guess my class chart is finally blown up, sure, they only waited (*checks last edit date*) SEVEN AND A HALF YEARS TO BLOW THAT GUESS UP, SURE

Wow. Okay, I feel some obligation to jump to conclusions and say the whole class chart is wrong, but let me stay strapped in to see if “passive” is as literal as one would expect alt!Callie to mean, or it just means “an active class passive compared to other classes”. And, serving the aspect? Oh dammit, now people are gonna come at me advocating a Maid / Page dichotomy about actively serving the aspect versus allowing the aspect to be served... or Page / Maid even, jesus

I wish I had enough energy to have those chats anymore. I’d rather hold on and see the whole ridiculous chart scheme they have in mind... which is definitely (and hopefully) the one Andrew really drew up at the time and not made up by the staff, even if it throws away plenty of my old work... I’ll just stop thinking about it and keep reading.

...

--no, I don’t think I can just stop thinking about it yet. Dammit, brain.

So um. Maids serving their aspect. There was a whole “Maids serve” thing going on throughout the whole plot of Homestuck, but despite how prevalent it was, I wrote it off as the story riffing on the classical definition of Maid when the actual stuff Maids accomplished was something different and more specific, just like Knights constantly got riffed on for chivalry and the like. Furthermore, service seemed like a really shitty class definition, when class definitions are the verbs one uses to interact with reality through Aspects to change the way reality unfolds, and “serving” isn’t really an action that results in change, implying a distinct deficit of agency that I wouldn’t have viewed as fair. (Especially since you originally think “meant to serve others” and not “meant to serve the aspect”, implying even LESS agency.) Furthermore, MOST passive classes from their descriptions seem to have a propensity to act “as if by the will of the aspect”, so even with the nuance of “serving the aspect”, devoting an entire class verb to service would just step on the territory of other active/passive class pairs’ passive sides, right?

But... IF we were to take this for granted as what it SEEMS... then concentrating on that angle of “serving the aspect” implies a whole lot more agency than a service class might sound on its surface. The definition fits with the story better once you contextualize all the Maid-y references to service around Jane, for instance, with the additional idea of “serving Life” by baking prolifically and creating more of its symbols in food and--

--fuck. “Serving”, like serving to others. Serving the aspect as its attendant AND serving it out to others that need it. Maybe this still IS part of the Additive class pair! Whoa. :O

Okay okay so, what I/we thought before was:

Create/Add - Maid / Sylph

Destroy/Reduce - Prince / Bard

But “additive” really isn’t an elegant verb compared to the “Destroyer” classes, so... could it be the “Servants” and the “Destroyers”? Like Maids cleaning up and healing the broken wreckage strewn through the halls by a bratty Prince’s tantrum???

It’d certainly be weird... and it’d CERTAINLY be a wild twist where I was partially wrong in some fascinating ways but not entirely off base?

One a passive but powerful servant to time, the other wielding the aspect like a honed blade.

And yet, I can’t bet on this being the situation yet; not at all. First, it relies on the idea that alt!Callie’s explicit narrative here is slightly misleading, which would be a pretty extreme thing to commit to, even for a technical truth like “she was saying it was passive relative to other classes even though it’s technically “active””. Second... it would mean that Muses are even more wildly defined than the previous insinuation of hers, that the Sylph -- what we thought was the passive additive class -- was not enough like a Muse compared to a Witch. Muses not being that Additive? I could grudgingly understand that, but Muses not being anything like passive Servants?! That would be EXTREMELY weird!

So... there’s not a whole lot of chance that I’m not dramatically wrong somewhere about these classes! In a way that throws the entire chart into disarray!

I’m... oddly excited? Huh.

That’s a pretty nice surprise that I actually feel that way.

(Don’t hit me up all at once to discuss this Classpect development over Discord, I’ll still need a few days without talking about Homestuck to recharge as usual. Like... maybe wait and come at me as a group chat? So I’m not talking about the latest developments separately with everyone? No that wouldn’t work, how about... guh I dunno, look my outlook’s a little more positive right now but dealing with Homestuck still takes emotional energy okay?)

Okay the rest of this page...

ARADIA: ... DAVEBOT: time then make a weird face ARADIA: ........ DAVEBOT: waste time DAVEBOT: time ARADIA:............. DAVEBOT: i experience all points of time simultaneously please just say time and make a weird face

This is true.

ARADIA: .................. DAVEBOT: cmon megido youre killing me clocks ticking ARADIA: ... ARADIA: time o_o

The Maid casts a furtive glance around the empty crew quarters, as though to search for someone more sympathetic to her bit.

ARADIA: tough crowd

Dorks.

> ==>

(Lazy fruit-throwing sword-training I won’t bother to screenshot but looks fun)

(I mean, really lazy looking, these people really don’t have Andrew’s knack for action composition that would make the same amount of gif-creation effort feel like a microcosm of the event they’re depicting, unfortunately. Again, I don’t blame them; Andrew was just too good at it.)

DAVEBOT: ok heres one DAVEBOT: how old do you think you are ARADIA: emotionally? ARADIA: that is a pretty heavy topic DAVEBOT: you know damn well thats not what i meant ARADIA: you know I have been through a lot dave DAVEBOT: ok ARADIA: its just so kind of someone DAVEBOT: ok i get it ARADIA: to finally ask how i feel ARADIA: i am beside myself with emotions ARADIA: i want to open up DAVEBOT: jesus christ ARADIA: shall i open up about my past traumas to you ARADIA: would you enjoy that ARADIA: to think even a frog like me can work through their pain with a dear friend ARADIA: you have truly blessed me on this day dave strider

Is Aradia JUST trolling here or is her Ultimate Self grappling with a ton of real unresolved trauma too that she’s bullshitting around Dave-style?

DAVEBOT: times fun when youre having flies

Okay that’s a damned good frog pun.

Alright now Davebot’s rapping

DAVEBOT: lacking tact i stay stacked while i breach contract DAVEBOT: sacred vows disavowed got divorce fever DAVEBOT: i leave her DAVEBOT: dont look back dont perceive her ARADIA: do you want to talk about it :( DAVEBOT: about what ARADIA: would you say you are hung up on leaving your wife and friends behind

Goddamnit is DAVE’S ton of real unresolved trauma leaking into his raps unintentionally Dave-style?? I knew we had to address it when we cut to Davebot but how about LESS TRAGEDY IN THIS COMIC MAYBE

DAVEBOT: arent you even a little guilty about ditching your boyfriend ARADIA: what ARADIA: oh fuck

But she knew what she was doing when she did it she explicitly did it didn’t she? Epilogues quote:

DAVEBOT: what about your boy DAVEBOT: eyepatches ARADIA: oh sollux is in one of his moods ARADIA: this was all getting to be a bit much for him ARADIA: if i go ill probably just cut him loose DAVEBOT: good move

And then they stepped through the sky hole more or less. Did like, distracted Ultimate Aradia not realize exactly how long she was leaving Sollux for, ie forever? Or did she “ascend” to Ultimate status later and hadn’t thought back to the full consequences of her actions within this timeline? Or both? From the looks of the link we’ll probably find out on the next pa--

--Wait. Something else I just thought of, unrelated.

If Aradia is an Ultimate Self, that’s another coincidentally Ultimate version of someone hanging around that happens to be on the prospective list of Soul-Powered Jujus that might have their creation loops closed in the coming story. Could those two things play into each other somehow? Like instead of their souls getting stuffed into the items, their “Ultimateness” is? Or as if that’s a necessary component, or... no, I’m probably overthinking things.

> (Months in the past, but not many...)

Uh huh. Is that flashing because he’s “watching” Aradia leave? But I thought Aradia SAID she was leaving--

> (==>)

--and that black hole portal doesn’t look as cool as it sounded in the Epilogues. But why was Aradia acting surprised, she said “I’ll probably just cut him loose” mere MOMENTS before entering the portal, did she mean “cut him loose” as in “I’m going to talk to him before leaving” and then just IMMEDIATELY forget that she didn’t say anything to him because she cared so little???

Wait. Waaaait wait wait. I think. I think maybe I missed some subtext. Lemme do some fuller quotes here:

ARADIA: oh sollux is in one of his moods ARADIA: this was all getting to be a bit much for him ARADIA: if i go ill probably just cut him loose DAVEBOT: good move

His gaze remains fixed on her. She blinks and looks away, unsure what to say next. He’s standing perfectly still, presumably waiting for her to say something. She met him... what was it? Once, twice before? She can’t remember. But she knows this is a very different Dave. Aside from the metal skin, he seems implacably confident. But then, people go through changes. She’s been through more than her share. She cocks an eyebrow, recalling her own stint with a metal body.

DAVEBOT: hey earth to whats your face ARADIA: oh ARADIA: its aradia

[...]

DAVEBOT: youre coming DAVEBOT: better decide quick i doubt that dank fuckin hell funnel is staying open for much longer ARADIA: yes i suppose so ARADIA: thats where all the action is right? DAVEBOT: all the action that matters yeah ARADIA: off we go then :) DAVEBOT: word

He holds out his hand. She looks around, and assumes he means for her to take it, so she does. She didn’t know someone could fly this fast. He nearly yanks her arm out of its socket. She considers reminding him that maybe this isn’t necessary, since she can fly too. But she doesn’t want to risk saying more embarrassing stuff around this outrageously cool dude. Besides, they’re through the wormhole before she can even finish the thought. It vanishes the moment they’ve crossed.

...this was a SHIPPING thing wasn’t it. She’s impressed as hell with Striderbot, she SAID she’d cut things off with Sollux, and then she was so busy being swooped off her feet and into the portal that she forgot to actually say anything to him. Is that what happened????

Ultimate Self Davebot x Ultimate Self Aradia. Huh. Didn’t see that coming. (Though, again... they could make it SLIGHTLY clearer that this wasn’t just a blatant continuity error.)

Anyway, a rare-don’t-get-used-to-it [S] page...

> [S] (Gaze.)

...Okay that was kinda funny.

> (==>)

SOLLUX: h0w the fuck am i g0ing t0 get d0wn fr0m here.

HAH! Okay, he’s taking it pretty well. :) --and THAT’s what she realized she forgot, giving him a flight down from the tower before leaving.

GOOD. KEEP THINGS HUMOROUS EVEN WHEN LITERAL ABANDONMENT IS HAPPENING. THAT’S the Homestuck I was missing. :) :) :)

> Back to reality.

(Since the black hole is outside “canon” reality.)

Those are some cool poses-AHAH JESUS CHRIST ALT!JADE YOU LOOK ABSOLUTELY TERRIFYING XD

COULD YOU MAYBE HAVE CLEANED UP THE DRIED BLOOD AT SOME POINT OR IS SOME OF THAT FRESH FROM EATING MORE RAW MEAT

(Lord English’s blood leaving permanent timeless bloodstains would be a cool new thing to squeeze into canon i admit, i wouldn’t blame them for taking the excuse even if you could find small canon counterexamples I’m not sure of but dimly think might exist)

((ALSO SHE’S GONNA BE TINY NEXT TO THEM I DUNNO IF THAT MAKES IT MORE TERRIFYING OR LESS, PROBABLY MORE))

DAVEBOT: so youre telling me you dont even feel a little bad that you ditched him to be a weird death acolyte ARADIA: no i think he found my wiles both charming and irresistible DAVEBOT: not even an ounce of guilt or self doubt huh DAVEBOT: just like that DAVEBOT: no conversations about the greater good DAVEBOT: no revelations about your feelings

Is Aradia a jerk or weird? Can’t decide.

ARADIA: do you often find your faith in yourself shaken like this or is it a new experience now that your mortal coil has been left behind DAVEBOT: what ARADIA: do you think now that all that is left of you is a literal ghost inside of a machine you are more or less likely to embrace finality DAVEBOT: oh dope more cult of one shit DAVEBOT: immortality changed you ARADIA: could it be that you are projecting your feelings onto my situation DAVEBOT: does not compute rose jr ARADIA: ... ARADIA: we dont have to talk about it DAVEBOT: thanks

Wow, I actually can’t follow this conversation at all. Let me stare at it for a sec...

...okay, the first part she’s talking about DAVE’s faith in HIMself being shaken, not her own. She’s not asking if he relates to HER experience, she’s contrasting it.

Then, asking if he’d be more likely to embrace death, or... Time? Death. Whether his self-worth has changed because he might view himself as “less real”, something Aradia doubtless struggled with when she was a robot who already had so many excuses to devalue herself at the time? And then Dave talks about “cult of one” shit what does that even mean-...

OH. Like she’s a death cult. Gooot it. Because Aradia’s of the position that death and ending should be celebrated, and Davebot understandably isn’t entirely bought in. This is as hard to parse down as one would EXPECT conversations between two Ultimate Selves to be hard to parse down, unlike Rose and Dirk where their insane missions and glaring flaws shine bright enough through it all that you can follow their conversation flow easily.

JADE: They sit in each other's presence, the silence between them as meaningful as any words they could exchange. DAVEBOT: its always really cool to hear how meaningful my silences are DAVEBOT: especially while DAVEBOT: CALCULATING DAVEBOT: CALCULATING DAVEBOT: especially while i am attempting to experience them

Alt!Callie pulling a narrative-text AFTER a talk-identifier like “JADE:” is really hilarious in my opinion.

JADE: i do not need your approval. the story will continue how it must. DAVEBOT: beep boop hater detected ARADIA: wow is that true JADE: i am not a hater. DAVEBOT: classic hater line DAVEBOT: i know this because i am pouring through genuine actual quadrabytes of information on historys most notorious haters JADE: no, you aren’t.

Pffffff. This is pretty fun.

DAVEBOT: you are the exact opposite of a hater ARADIA: a liker DAVEBOT: ok DAVEBOT: perfect example your tolerance for whatever is going on with DAVEBOT: all this ARADIA: i think she looks quite lovely covered in the viscera of the all-powerful enemy she consumed ARADIA: floating lifelessly in our periphery ARADIA: observing our every action and noting its relevance :) DAVEBOT: uh huh thats what i mean

I was gonna note “liker” as additive for pointless classpect purposes, but really more quoting it just because I really enjoy this conversation. I’m starting to get sold on the chemistry of these two a lot faster than I expected.

JADE: even though I understand that it must happen, i am growing frustrated with the direction of this conversation. DAVEBOT: do you want to talk about something else stinky JADE: what would you suggest?

How long has that dried fucking blood been on her

DAVEBOT: ok hear me out DAVEBOT: kanaya DAVEBOT: but like DAVEBOT: wearing huge jorts

That explains Homestuck’s twitter earlier

> Weeks in the future, relative to the original point of interest...

Wait wait which point of interest? This time we were just viewing? *click*

I love what must be this shitty imagination-ship they’re using to cross the substrate of reality

> ==>

Whoaaaa. So they DIDN’T stay in those outfits for long? It showed them in a bunk bed earlier, it showed CallieJade still going around blood-covered afterward-- dammit, I’m having a hard time gauging exactly how much time is supposed to have passed between their entry into the black portal, their earlier conversation, and this moment. And as likely as some are to call this poor scene composition, I can’t think it’s anything but intentional, given we’re dealing with a couple of Ultimate Time players bullshitting with each other.

Moments like these are not rare, and serve a valuable function to the story. They are able to show a passage of time with the bulk of the emotional labor of a lengthy bonding process happening off screen. How did we get here? What have they been through? These questions are often better left open to individual interpretation and can give the one interpreting a sense of ownership of the story.

See? We’re being trolled is why. (Even if the authors are pulling the trick Alt!Callie describes maybe a little too damn often, because a cut like this where we’re supposed to fill in the emotional gaps and intervening events ourselves as readers depends on readers’ faith that sensible events and decisions for these characters would OCCUPY the gaps, as if readers don’t have faith that what intervenes WOULD make sense to their understanding of the characters the way the authors are writing them... it just seems like an excuse to do whatever you want without adequately explaining yourself, when in reality if you’d spelled out the events that led to it we’d all cry foul at the mischaracterization.)

...okay, maybe I’m a BIT bitter. Sorry. Where were we?

JADE: As a point of curiosity- ARADIA: oh shit!!!!

The dead Cherub possessing the body of an equally deceased Goddess of Space pauses at the interruption.

She doesn’t talk much, then? Too busy doing whatever talking you’d do as your other possessed Jade body? Just how temporally related is you controlling THIS Jade compared to when you were controlling the other? When that Jade pegged you as enjoying contact with friends, are these two just not enough for you, or did you “experience” the trips entirely separately? I don’t THINK the alt!Callie possessing either Jade is a separate entity from the other, but...

Were she to voice her opinion, it would be that --actually-- it is not unusual for those whose primary concern is The Grander Scheme to have a passing curiosity about the insignificant. So when one really thinks about it, any annoyance with the attendant’s small mindedness is both understandable and warranted.

She pissed

...also, “the attendant”. Even if “serve” is really the verb here, that phrasing really irks me as if she’s talking down to her. Which, I mean, makes sense for alt!Callie’s character, but doesn’t make me feel better about this new definition being foisted on us.

ARADIA: :( JADE: as a point of order, you never answered dave’s question. ARADIA: which one he is very chatty JADE: you experience time in a way that is woefully unfamiliar to me and it has... piqued my curiosity enough to learn more. ARADIA: ?_? DAVEBOT: shes asking how old you are

Wait a minute, is Alt!Callie asking a question about a dropped topic from WEEKS ago?! And is Davebot so in touch with Time and the meta ordering of topics that he actually CAUGHT ON that fast to what she was actually wondering about?????

This is getting more disorienting by the minute.

ARADIA: in this form our bodies stop aging once we reach maturity i think ARADIA: the god tier keeps our physical form locked in a state of undying ARADIA: even in death the bodies do not decay ARADIA: only lay dormant

THAT LAST PART IS FUCKING IMPORTANT. It’s being brought up intentionally to tell us that JOHN’S DEAD BODY can still be in the wallet Terezi’s carrying around RIGHT NOW without having decayed over the past years. I remember remarking in SOME previous HS^2 liveblog post of mine that I was alarmed by the decay that would have happened there (can’t find my remark on short notice and don’t really care to), so this explicitly dismisses it so we won’t be surprised by the fact that she could keep it in just-dead condition.

DAVEBOT: like how long have you been alive JADE: yes, that one.

[...]

ARADIA: oh maybe a few hundred years or so DAVEBOT: what JADE: what? ARADIA: well if i had known you were going to be so judgy about it DAVEBOT: when did this happen ARADIA: oh i spent some time in other doomed realities and timelines and came back before anybody could tell i was gone

Hm!

We knew she spent a LONG time in the dream bubbles, enough to talk to “pretty much all of the Nepetas”, but she was actually able to access a universe or universes and hop between them? That’s not something any time traveller we’ve seen has been explicitly able to do intentionally before, quite like she’s describing.

DAVEBOT: oh just out for a bit of fun then DAVEBOT: just hopped on over to a different reality DAVEBOT: real casual like DAVEBOT: oh hello dont mind me just popping in to see if it really is as doomed as they say it is DAVEBOT: did not disappoint ARADIA: yes almost exactly like that :) DAVEBOT: who did you hang out with are they cooler than me ARADIA: it is complicated to explain DAVEBOT: oh ok nevermind then DAVEBOT: all clear

Yep, he’s kinda bewildered. Is this Pesterquest stuff she’s referring to? Did she stop by Pesterquest?

DAVEBOT: a whole alternate universe ripe with the coolest motherfuckers imaginable ARADIA: you were there too i threw your air conditioner into the sun DAVEBOT: wow thats fucked up DAVEBOT: thats not where that goes at all JADE: these events are not-canonical. ARADIA: rude

Ah! Yeah, almost certainly Pesterquest. (Still haven’t played that and have little inclination to now that I’m more sure we aren’t being gaslit with intentional continuity errors, just disappointed by actual continuity errors.) Oh! And that makes a bit more sense because I imagine that’s Black Hole territory, and that territory outside of Canon seems pretty rich and easy for time-travellers to hop between stories and timelines willy-nilly. As they’re apt to in fanfics, which is the most appropriate way for things to be in that realm!

DAVEBOT: is that the trope of being hundreds of years old but looking young forever patently sucks ass DAVEBOT: a plot device an asshole would write ARADIA: :( JADE: that is not what i am trying to say at all. DAVEBOT: hmm wow yeah thatd really be a sort of pot/kettle situation i guess DAVEBOT: i cant believe im the only woke one here DAVEBOT: its hard being such a visionary AND such a fine metallic specimen DAVEBOT: but im an altruist first and fucking foremost ARADIA: so selfless JADE: yes, the greater narrative is truly blessed by your beneficent presence. DAVEBOT: oh so you got jokes now huh JADE: i have always had the ‘jokes’ of which you speak, but i have heretofore exercised restraint in laying you low. JADE: i possess knowledge of many of your iterations, as the scope of my powers allows me to exist in several narrative structures at once. DAVEBOT: but can she see why kids love the sweet cinnamon taste of cinnamon toast crunch JADE: i do not know, or care, what that means. ARADIA: neither do i :)

I’m actually really enjoying this conversation

JADE: its cultural significance to you as an earthling is wasted on the two of us entirely, as we have not conflated the misguided notion of clinging to nostalgic cereal advertisement trivia with socially relevant conversation.

Pff she literally checked her meta notes just now to learn what the cereal ads were after admitting she didn’t know what it meant and pretending not to care

> ==>

Oh, closer look at Davebot. Are those actual SHAPED shades over his robotic eye bulges? Weird, I thought it was just a lazy line drawn between them with red sharpie at first, Sans style. That would’ve been funny.

> ==>

Ohh, I get it. I was gonna say that was an unwarranted reaction... but he just realized that the Time-wait puns will be coming from BOTH his shipmates from now on. That’s gotta be a downer. :)

> ==>

HOLY

FUCKING

SHIT

IS ALT-CALLIE LAUGHING!??!?!?!??

That’s REALLY, REALLY GOOD!!! SHE’S ALREADY LAUGHING OCCASIONALLY THAT MAKES ME SO HAPPY

“BEST NARRATOR” COFFEE CUP

SHE’S ADORABLE

> ==>

Ah, was that Jade kicking you out? Or just the multiverse punishing you for being briefly happy :(

--oh, end of the update. Guess that’s it for now!

...

Alright I know I’m A BIT BEHIND on covering the HS2 commentary,

But

I really would rather wait on that a bit longer if that’s alright. Real busy and stressful week or two. (Found out my hair is starting to thin noticeably at age 31! Quite suddenly, too. Blood test looks fine so it’s nothing serious... gonna see a doctor to check if anything can be safely done about that, it’s really hurting my self-esteem more than I thought it would. Didn’t think it would hit my emotions that hard when it eventually happened, knew it was likely but not so SOON... really messing with my anxiety every time I accidentally touch my hair, now. I’ll deal with it.)

If I sound really aimless in this post, I think it’s cause I am? My mental and emotional energy’s REALLY drained. I’m glad that June/July break in HS^2 happened when it did, and I’m definitely glad there’s apparently plenty in HS^2 I can really enjoy, if this update is anything to go by. Maybe this comic can help lift me up instead of knocking me down. :)

See y’all later! More Patreon commentary blogging catchup after some other upd8.

#Homestuck #hs2 #Homestuck Liveblog #upd8 #Homestuck^2 #Homestuck Theories #Homestuck Theory #spoiler #spoilers #Classes and Aspects #Space and Time #Aradia

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theelliottsmiths · 4 years

Note

Could you please liveblog The Making of Rosenrot and Mein Herz Brennt.

Okay I'm gonna do Rosenrot here and then make a separate one for MHB, scheduled so nobody gets a massive wall of text I uh. Assume you pop around to check if I've answered stuff occasionally and this isn't a two ships passing in the night deal. I might schedule this one for like midday tomorrow to increase specifically your chance of seeing it as it's 00:27 BST here currently.

I have probably already done one but here's the thing, it's my favourite making of and it's been a while.

Right at the beginning chess piece Richard lurking in the sunrise smoking. Very cute, still despise the hat. Nodding roughly in time? Fun, though I'm curious as to what he was actually nodding for. To look cool? It didn't work

Oli suits the lurking in a habit thing

Paul looks so so sleepy and it's kind of adorable.

I lose it a little every time he says 'shave off my sideburns I don't know if monks have sideburns' as if he doesn't have earrings. I think he just likes it, it seems like it was the fashion to shave the sideburns and a little extra in the DDR alt scene?

Hnnnn the little noises he makes when he's getting the hood put on my HEART

On the hill just before they're shooting it sounds like Zoran is backwards somehow

Like usual, only some of the boys are allowed to look good. Schneider and Till? Beautiful. Flake and Richard. Very silly. Oli and Paul are fine.

Flakes little beanie. Tills little grin. Richard looking deeply uncomfortable. Suspicious, even. Oli masterfully blending into the background

Schneider is somehow actually more suspicious even than Richard. He has a very suspicious face in general when he's Present.

Nobody can resist fuzzy Till when he says But I wanna make friends too :( Even melted Zorans heart

I want. To rub his soft and fuzzy little head. It's so spherical.

There's something about them seating Till and Paul so they look the same size that I just really enjoy

Richard: shouldnt we have knives??

Zoran: no, you're monks! He does.

Richard: we don't kill him? :/

Paul: we burn him...

Richard, in an intrigued and distinctly positive voice: we burn him?

Flake is smiling at him it's so sweet I love to be reminded that they all love each other

I like the way Richard says 'like the inquisition?'. No real reason, just sounds nice.

Is 'in prinzip'(?) A common phrase in general or is it a Zoran thing? He says it a lot.

I'm only five minutes in this is going to be so long mobile tumblr doesn't let me add an under the cut I'm so sorry

When he talks to other Germans Paul's accent is so detectable. I adore it, it's like the bubble writing teenaged girls use on posters.

The chainsaw. I always forget the chainsaw. Paul being Paul, it's the most fitting choice. Chaos gremlin.

SCHNEIDER AND THE PUPPY

Richard looming over the children in the seesaw like the grim reaper waiting for one to fall off and crack their head on something hard

Olis sleeve wine is genuinely the funniest thing any of them have ever done. He has a penchant for doing robot movements and it's gotten to a point where I wonder if he's an android. A factory runaway because he was slightly faulty and about to be switched off. He ended up staying with Richard and Schneider because Richard understood and schneider didn't notice.

'dont bother asking me any questions, enough questions have already been asked' he says in his little beanie. Owns my heart. If the film thing is remotely true I want to know what Richard thinks, being so into films himself. He's smirking a tiny bit

God, he looks uncomfortable about the kiss.

Hey so anyway what is that guy doing behind him? Cleaning? Because he's using a paintbrush to do it and now I'm questioning whether most of the whipping was real...

I mean, later on you can physically see a welt forming in Paul's shoulder and they're all clearly in a bit of pain but that doesn't mean it's all real... Unless he's, like, painting on some ointment?

I adore this whole chunk of till practicing the murder scene, he's so... Disarming. Like hi yes I'm large and have a knife but you see, I'm actually small and silly look at my fuzzy head I'm v v approachable see my goofy pointy tooth smile? And my high voice and nice accent

Why is Zoran dressed as a monk too

You go here, and i—oop—make like this and then I get the knife and *stab sound*. I hit two, three times

Have you ever really payed attention to the way he makes his T sounds? It makes sense that it's different to the standard because teeth but this

Schneider looks so much like a plague doctor... Kinda into that.

I don't like that Zoran doesn't use Cătălinas name

Richards hair refuses to lie flat. The smoke floating up and then clicking into a straight line always catches my attention

Flake avoiding eye contact is, as the kids say, a major mood. Did he not understand Zoran or was he ignoring him til Oli got his attention? Was he already going deaf in one ear by that point? He looks like, and I mean this in the most loving way, a Muppet when he's looking directly at her. I think it was purposeful

Till giggling when Zoran tickles him with the rose. I do not understand why he says their relationship is ambiguous when they're... in bed together.

Hhhhhh god till looks so good in the flagellation lesson though. Soft sweet chumby boy. I like how visible his scar is.

Paul is always so into the violence and chaos isn't he? I like that he's singing the song but specifically it's the guitars, not the melody. And then theres Flake, the amateur masochist. The sudden camera eye contact always gets me.

A thing I really love about the whole self flagellation thing is that Paul is right there with till the entire time. He hurts himself almost as much as till does, he's there assisting when till is experimenting (sidenote...he does look good though huh), he's across the way where they can see each other in the circle (Richard is directly across which, I don't know, I feel like it's intentional). It seems like he's supporting him. Also that he's just a chaos gremlin and likes to be where the action is.

I've gone into so much detail about their whipping styles in the past

Schneider must be really relieved they didn't really use any of the clips during the whipping where he looks like a sock. He does not look mean he looks like a sock puppet with no hand I'm sorry but it's true

I do like the way Schneider and Paul talk about it though. They got a lot from the experience, it seems. I'd like to hear their thoughts on it now.

'Till, don't defend yourself!' ...the wriggling is cute

Flake and Richard having a little smile :) but Oli and Schneider, deadly serious.

Richard and Till... Should wrestle. Between this and Haifisch it's clear it'd be beneficial. Mein Teil does not count, it should be one on one.

I wish I knew what Till says as he gets up, I'm assuming hes joking about Richard beating him up?

Richard and paul are so careful beating him up. Paul especially is very careful to just softly jostle him. Also, the softest ear pinch

Oli: grinning, happy with their work

Paul: looking serious, not enjoying it at all

Richard: 😬, not remotely a fan, experiencing physical pain just seeing it

Oli heads off Paul's complaints perfectly, it's so practiced. He must have to do it regularly, Paul complains just for the fun of it.

-17° and he has Till topless on his back. Unnecessary. Its so cold the screen doesn't work.

I like to think they tried to drag him not-on his back

I just... I really Like Rosenrot and the making of.

#me rambling #rosenrot #rammstein #when soft fuzzy rosenrot till comes on screen i can feel my pupils dilating

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starrysky-whumpfics · 4 years

Text

5. Sick During The Holidays (ALT Prompt)

Whump Advent Calendar

@whump-advent-calendar

Crying because I have one night to write my psychology research paper, love finals week and procrastination 👏🏻 Anyways, this feels late to be updating but finally, here’s the next prompt. I had to use an ALT because it fit the flow of the story better

Once morning arrived, Tyler and Ozzie reluctantly got themselves up to go out and look for any possible resources, holding onto the hope of eventual safety and comfort.

Tyler went and got some water from the lake, bringing it back to their temporary camp to boil it over the fire for precaution. Tyler had to use one of their shoes as a bowl, neither was delighted by the idea but they both eventually agreed that it was necessary. Dehydration wasn’t something they needed to add to the long list of problems to worry about. Tyler had made sure to at least clean it off in the lake though for extra precaution.

“If we find a cabin or something then we might have a good chance of getting out quickly.” Tyler said optimistically, their voice was hoarse and nasally from congestion, they were extremely pale except for their eyes and nose which were a bright red. Ozzie appeared to be in a similar state, staring desperately at the water to ease his sore throat.

Once Tyler seemed confident enough that the water would be safe, both of them took turns taking sips.

“Won’t your foot be cold now?” Ozzie asked, noting Tyler’s now burnt shoe that was practically useless now.

“No. Because you’re going to give me one of your shoes and I’m going to carry you.”

“How are you going to carry me? You’re already looking like you’re going to pass out.” Ozzie argued.

“I’m gonna carry you.” Tyler said dismissively. “You’re a lot smaller than me, well not a lot, but you’re still smaller.”

“You won’t even be able to pick me up—oh maybe you will.” Ozzie corrected himself as Tyler walked over and lifted him off the ground. Ozzie sighed and kicked off a shoe to lend to Tyler so they could get going.

They walked around for over an hour before stumbling upon a cabin, rushing inside with excitement. Tyler set Ozzie down on the couch and tossed a blanket from one of the closets at him. Tyler wandered around the cabin until they found what they were looking for, a landline telephone. They quickly dialed a number, hoping that the connection would be good enough.

“No! Wait, Maudie, it’s me.” Tyler said quickly when the phone picked up. “It’s Tyler, please don’t hang up…” They said, starting to tear up and cry. Tyler quickly took a deep breath to calm down.

“Ozzie and I got away from Holli and ended up at some forest, we got lost and then it was just one thing after the other, we’re exhausted and starting to get sick, we need help.” They looked around for anyway to say where they were, locating a map and telling her the name. “The cabin number was like fourteen I think if that helps too…we’ll be okay just hurry.” They said before hanging up.

“Who’s Maudie?” Ozzie asked as Tyler walked back and cuddled next to him on the couch.

“My best friend, she took care of me after I got kicked out. I haven’t seen her ever since like right before I met you. She gave me a cell-phone to keep in contact with her too, but I never got it back after your mom took it away. Luckily I memorized her number when she first gave it to me.”

“My mom wouldn’t have had a chance to take your phone if you didn’t make it obvious that you had one by watching a YouTube video.” Ozzie said laughing. “You had an entire cell-phone, to make calls and texts, and you choose to watch a YouTube video.”

“In my defense, race car videos calm me down when I’m nervous, and I forgot about the calling and texting thing in the moment because I never had a reason to actually use it since Maudie was always with me before that. I know though now how to use the technology.”

“Do you really though?”

“I have the cell-phone thing down, calls and texts. Though calls are easier because texting involves more buttons that I have to find.”

Their laughter slowly died as sickness and exhaustion overtook them. When they woke up again though, the first thing they both noticed was warmth, then the familiar glare of artificial light. Tyler sat up slowly, finding themselves in a bedroom, Ozzie asleep next to them. Maudie was sitting at the desk reading various magazine articles until she noticed Tyler was awake.

“Is this nearly dying thing going to become a habit that we need to have a talk about?” She asked them, only somewhat joking. The sound of hearing her voice again warmer Tyler’s heart quickly, a soft southern voice that was gentler and kinder than their own mother’s voice had ever been.

“I missed you so much!” Tyler stood up from the bed and ran over to hug her, despite the nausea that overcame them as they stood up. She hugged them back and walked them backwards towards the bed to lay them back down.

“Good to see you too, you’re sick though and you’re going to rest.” She said patting their head, smiling though with relief that they were okay. “Your voice sounds terrible right now, you’ve got some sort of frog up your throat. I left you some waters on the nightstand for both of you, and I’m getting some hot water brewing soon too. I’ve got plenty of flu medicine too.”

Tyler nodded, moving back underneath the covers to go back to sleep, smiling at the feeling of safety and comfort they had once again.

#whump #whump community #whump writing #whump ocs #wac2020 #sickfic #rescued #found family

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incarnateirony · 5 years

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Hey dude! Do you have any recommendations for LGBTQ+ movies in the romance genre that have like a happy ending. I really don't care how old they are. I'm feeling the Gay™ hence I need the Gay™. You feel me?

HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII NONNIE

First sorry for taking so long, not only did I have to timeline this :) but :) my computer :) froze :) after writing like :) 2 pages :) and I had to do it again :)

So anyway let it be said, the LGBT dialogue is one of osmosis and shared growth and awareness. Some of these films will be very poorly dated, but as you (thankfully) mentioned that them being old wasn’t a *problem*, expect a lot of old stuff. Because one of the most important things to have under your belt when talking about the LGBT media representation battle is the actual journey from A to B – be that incrementalization, subtextual inclusion, text-breeching features, outright evocative and groundbreaking films at the time (which is what MOST of this list will be) and an improvement in our dialogue; let us never forget that while tr*nss*xual is considered a slur and transgender is proper, tr*nss*xual was at one point the politically correct way to speak it – things like that breach in our growing understanding of the spectrum of human sexuality.

I *WILL* disclaimer these aren’t all romance, so if you explicitly want romance, google them and take a look if it sounds to appeal, but I’m taking this as a general cinema history plug considering what a confused mess fandom conversation about LGBT history in film or modern text as applicable, accepted or not.

Wonder Bar (1936) (I wouldn’t really call this queer cinema, but if you have the time to watch it too, I think it was the first explicit mention of homosexual engagement even if it was fleetingly brief. You might even call it Last Call style. A blink and you’ll miss it plug that was still decades ahead of its time)

Sylvia Scarlet (1936) (Again, I wouldn’t call this queer cinema, but a lot of the community takes it as the first potential trans representation on TV due to the lead literally swapping gender presentation, even if the presentation is… not what we would modernly call representation IMO)

Un Chant d'Amour (1950) (Worth it for the sheer fact that it pissed off fundies so bad they took it all the way to the US supreme court to get it declared obscene.)

The Children’s Hour (1961) (also known as the 1961 lesson to “don’t be a gossipy, outting bitch”)

Victim (1961) (The first english film to use the word “homosexual” and to focus explicitly on gay sexuality. People might look on it disdainfully from modern lenses, but it really helped progress british understanding of homosexuality)

Scorpio Rising (1964) (Lmao this one deadass got taken to court when it pissed people off and California had to rule that it didn’t count as obscene bc it had social value, worth it for the history if nothing else)

Theorem (1968) (Because who doesn’t wanna watch a 60s flick about a bisexual angel, modern issues and associations be damned)

The Killing of Sister George (1968) (by the makers of What Ever Happened To Baby Jane)

Midnight Cowboy (1969) (…have I had sassy contagonists in RP make a Dean joke off of this more than once, maybe)

Fellini-Satyricon (1969) (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THIS)

The Boys in the Band (1970) (This… this… this made a lot of fuss. Just remember leather)

Pink Narcissus (1971) (a labor of love shot on someone’s personal camera)

Death in Venice (1971) (This is basically a T&S prequel but whatever, based on a much older book)

Cabaret (1972)

Pink Flamingos (1972) (SHIT’S WILD)

The Bitter Tears of Petra von Kant (1972) (The title doesn’t lie, be warned)

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) [god I hope you’ve at least seen this]

Fox and His Friends (1975) (some really hard lessons that are still viable today, that just because someone acknowledges your sexuality doesn’t mean they give a shit about you as a person, and that some will even abuse the knowledge for gain)

The Terence Davies Trilogy (1983) (REALLY interesting history look it up, it’s sort of one of those “drawn from own experience” story short sets)

The Times of Harvey Milk (1984) (Documentary)

Desert Hearts (1985) (Pretty much the first film to put lesbianism into a good light as a true focus based on a novel from the sixties)

Parting Glances (1986) (the only film its creator got out before his death from the aids epidemic)

Law of Desire (1987) (two men and a trans woman in a love triangle, kinda ahead of its time)

Maurice (1987) (This one’s really interesting, cuz it was based on a book made about 15 years before it, but the book itself had been written half a century earlier and wasn’t published until after the guy died, he just thought it’d never get published Cuz Gay, so basically it’s based on a story written in like, the 20s finally getting screen time. It has a bittersweet but positive-leaning-ish ending without disregarding the cost that can come with it and even addresses class issues at the same time 100% DO RECOMMEND)

Tongues Untied (1989) (a documentary to give voices to LGBT black men)

Longtime Companion (1990) (This one’s title alone is history, based on a NYT phrasing for how they talked about people’s partners dying, eg longtime companion, during the AIDS epidemic)

Paris Is Burning (1990) (Drag culture and related sexual and gender identity exploration as it intersected with class issues and other privileges explored in a documentary)

The Crying Game (1992)( I should correct this that I guess it’s more, 1992 considered, “SURPRISE, DIL HAS A DILL!” – I guess I really didn’t do that summary justice by modern language and dialogue as much as how people in the 90s were talking about that and that’s a my bad. LIKE. SEE, EVEN I CAN FUCK UP MY LANGUAGE I’M SORRY CAN I BLAME THE STRAIGHTS T_T) #90skidproblems – I guess I should call it a trans film. And this alone tells me I should go watch it again to recode it in my brain modernly rather than like circa de la 2000 understanding.

The Bird Cage (1996) (So you mix drag culture, otherwise heterosexually connected lovebirds, and then realize the girl comes from an alt-rightish house and the guy comes from a Two Dads Home and does cabaret, how to deal with the issues OF this conflict when it’s between you and your happiness, even if the fight isn’t even your own as much as it is that of the person you love. The answer is PROBABLY NOT to dress in drag and pretend to be straight, but what are you going to do? – while played for laughs we’d consider modernly crude, the fact that they even dared to approach this narrative was pretty loud)

The Celluloid Closet (1996) (Ever heard of the Vito Russo test for LGBT representation? This is based on a book by Vito Russo.)

Happy Together (1997) (Ain’t this shit an ironic name; a mutual narrative, via chinese flick, of hong kong ceding to china and an irrevocably tangled MLM pairing as a giant mirrored metaphor)

Boys Don’t Cry (1999) (one of the most groundbreaking films about trans identity at the time)

Stranger Inside (2001) (As easy as it is to recoil to the idea of “black gays in jail”, the film makers actually went and consulted prisoners and put a great deal of focus into intersectional african american issues that really weren’t around even in straight films at the time)

Transamerica (2005) (While it made a bit of a fuss for not casting an actual trans actor, it was one of the first times a big budget studio really tried to tackle it which really pushed us forward)

Call Me by Your Name (2017) (since I’ve apparently leaned really heavy old cinema throw in a modern one lmaooooo)

Also honorable The Kids Are All Right (2010) mention for the sake of the fucking title alone.

And to any incarnation of “On the Road” by Kerouac, which

Was originally a book

Released a sanitized de-gayed edition because of the times

Later released the full homo manuscript

had a few film adaptations

Was one of Kripke’s founding inspirations for Supernatural once he left behind “Some reporter guy chases stories” and took the formula of Sal and Dean (and tbh later, Carlo) in a beat generation vibe gone modern as we know it today.

Reading both versions of this can actually help some folks currently understand that when you get confused over some shit (WHY IS CARLO SO UPSET? WHY IS HE ACTING LIKE AN UPSET GIRLFRIEND??? WHY IS HE SO JEALOUS AND SAD WHEN DEAN IS AROUND GIRLS???? WE JUST DONT KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWW) it’s because some big money asshat bleached the content, and sometimes, it takes a while for the full script to come out and again, surprise, it’s been GAY, they just didn’t want to OFFEND anybody. *jazz hands*

Now if you wanna go WAY WAY BACK, during 191X years, a bunch of gender role flicks came out like Charley’s Aunt, Mabel’s Blunder and the Florida Enchantment.

Also where is @thecoffeebrain-blog to yell about the necessity of watching Oz, for the next few hours? But no, seriously, just look into the entire LGBT *HISTORY* of Oz.

Beyond that though I’m gonna stop here cuz hi that’s a lot. I really don’t know how much counts as “happy ending” but if I had to give an LGBT cinema rec list, that’s it as a sum. I don’t really have like, a big portfolio of UWU HAPPY ENDING GAYS because 1. there aren’t a lot of those but 2. to me, it’s not about the ending, it’s about the journey. Be that in flick or through culture and history itself.

If you want more happy ending stuff, you definitely have to look at 2010+, but it’s not like we’re in a rich and fertile landscape yet so honestly just googling that would probably serve you better since I don’t explicitly explore romance genre or happy endings to really have a collection. LGBT life is hard and film often reflects that if we’re making genuine statements about it and really representing it, and we’re just now getting to a point of reliably having the chance at a happy ending. That or maybe someone can add like “Explicit happy endings” lists after this that has more experience in that subgenre.

Also, I can’t emphasize ENOUGH to remember what was progressive then is not what is progressive now, and frankly, what some people think is progressive now they’ll probably look back on what they said and feel really fuckin’ embarrassed. See: “It’s not text because by alt right homophobic dialogue, M/M sex isn’t gay if you do the secret handshake” MGTOW kinda crazy ass dialogue or parallel narratives they inspire that encourage self-closeting and denial based on the pure idea that being gay makes you somehow lesser, so It’s Not That. Like. I am. 99% sure. At least half of the people talking in this fandom. Are going to regret that the internet is forever. And maybe hope hosting servers end in the inevitable nuclear war that will annihilate this planet.

Also, edit: Speaking of mistaken dialogues and words aging poorly, I’d like to apologize from the poor description I rendered “The Crying Game” with, but that really goes to show how deep-seated the issue is we can so casually fuck up identifying a trans narrative as SURPRISE DICK IS GAY when we were all absorbing the content like 20+ years ago and HOW HARD it can be to de-code yourself from that kind of programming because here I am, writing a giant assed rep post and fucking it up because my brain hadn’t soaked that movie since Y2K. Guess what, time for me to go watch the Crying Game again.

#lgbtqia #representation #media #cinema history

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crystalninjaphoenix · 5 years

Text

The Second Crossover Episode

Septics Inverted

A JSE Fanfic

People seemed to really like the first one, so I wrote another! Because there are a lot more boys that can meet each other across worlds, and a lot of these encounters are going to be...not so good. But some of them could be positive! Be optimistic, despite how most of my AU is just...villains

Again, you can find Swap Boys content on @huffle-dork‘s blog!

Read the intro story: Part One | Part Two

Various other AU-related stuff found here

Still not sure about adding the taglist to not normal AU material, but here I go anyways | Taglist: @evyptids @awkward-bullshit @watermelonsinmyattic @asunachinadoll @a-humble-narcissus @metautske @odysseus-is-best-boi @acuriousquail @beerecordings

Alt spent what felt like an hour wandering the streets before he finally admitted it: not only was he lost, but he wasn’t even in his city anymore. He recognized absolutely nothing. Every street turned where it was supposed to be straight, and every twist was actually a crossroad. He didn’t know where he was, or even how he got here. Alt stopped running right under a street lamp, looking around at low, dim buildings he’d never seen before.

He sat down hard on the curb and put his head in his hands. Why did this happen to him? Why couldn’t he just go home, see his cat, and be left alone? He wanted to blame Magnificent, but the magician had been seemed just as confused as he was back in that museum-type place. So he didn’t even have that explanation. He could feel tears prickling at the back of his eyes. He didn’t belong here. And he didn’t know how to get back, or if anyone would bother to come look. Nobody looked the last time. His shoulders started shaking as he let the tears fall.

“Excuse me? Are you okay?”

Alt looked up, hurriedly wiping his eyes on his jacket sleeve. There was a man staring down at him with concern. He wore a dark red hoodie and black jeans, and he...almost looked like Jackie. But less tired, and with longer hair, long enough to be held back in a ponytail that peeked out from inside the jacket’s hood. “Wh—yeah, yeah I’m...fine,” Alt said, pulling up his bandanna.

“Most people don’t cry when they’re fine,” the man remarked. “What’re you doin’ out here? Don’t you know it’s dangerous?”

Alt laughed. “You’re out here.”

“Well, I can take care of myself. Not everyone can. Not that I’m saying you can’t,” he hurried to add, seeing Alt’s eyes start to darken. “I just want to make sure you’re not in trouble. Or, you know, causing trouble.”

“I’m fine,” Alt insisted, resolutely turning away. “I’m just...lost. I’m new here.”

“Well, do you know where you need to go?”

Alt could feel the tears again. But he blinked them away. “I can figure it out.”

The man gave him a peculiar look. It wasn’t pity, thank god, but it was something similar. Sympathy, maybe. “Look, I’m still worried about you, not gonna lie. I’m out here with a friend of mine. If you want, you can just...hang around with us? It’s better to travel in a group.”

His instinct was to deny help again. But he forced himself to take a step back. He was alone in a strange city, Magnificent was on the loose along with what must’ve been some sort of evil duplicate of himself, and he had no idea what to do. And this guy wasn’t being a bossy ass about going with him, just giving him an option. “...fine,” Alt grumbled, standing up. “Maybe for a little while.”

The man practically melted with relief, smiling. “Great! I left him over on the corner, he was texting a friend. C’mon, I’ll show you.” He started to walk away, making sure Alt was following him. “Oh, my name’s Jackie, by the way.”

Alt faltered in his steps. “Wait, really?” He’d just been thinking about how this guy reminded him of Jackie. Was this...?

“Yeah. You, uh...okay?” the other Jackie asked. “You got really pale all of a sudden.”

“I just—I have a friend named Jackie, too,” Alt explained. “You, uh, kind of...remind me of him.”

The other Jackie laughed. “Cool. Good to know we’ve got another doppelganger out there. Besides you, I mean.”

“We?”

“Yeah, me and my housemates. We all sorta look alike. Some differences, but in general we’re, like, clones.” Jackie looked ahead. “Oh hey, I can show you. Chase!”

They’d reached the street corner, where a man was leaning against the pole of the traffic light. He was wearing a red snap-back cap pulled down, and was absorbed in his phone. The man looked up at the sound of the name ‘Chase.’ “Oh hey, you finally decided to come back. Find out what that noise was?”

Alt stopped, staring with wide eyes. He wasn’t sure his heart was beating. “Ch-Chase?” he asked in a strangled voice.

This other Chase gave him a weird look. “Yeah, that’s my name. Why, you heard it before? And also, you okay, dude? You look like you’re having a heart attack.”

Alt took a few steps back, reexamining what he was seeing. There was a lack of toned muscles that came with a life of fighting crime, and no freckles in sight. But there was absolutely no doubt. He’d know Chase’s face anywhere, and this was him, but he was so different. And wrong. Alt found he was breathing very quickly but he just couldn’t stop. “Th-this isn’t how it’s s-supposed to be,” he said, gasping. “I just want—I just want to go home. Why can’t I go home?!” When he shouted that last question, a glitch slipped in, vibrant pixels blinking into existence and fading away again.

The two others immediately snapped into action. The other Chase dropped his phone, letting it fall to the ground, and his hand went to his belt, where he pulled out a gun that had been belted there. The other Jackie jumped back, reaching into his hoodie pocket and pulling a large pocket knife out, flipping open the blade. “What do you think you’re doing?!” Chase demanded, pointing the gun at Alt.

Alt, for his part, was just even more confused, but that confusion was now mixed with fear. That caused his glitching to intensify. “I—I d-don’t know what—what are you—”

“What, did you think you could fool us like that, Anti?” Jackie demanded.

“Anti...?” For a moment, Alt panicked, thinking these bizarro versions of his friends somehow found out his real name when he’d never even told the real ones. But then he remembered. “W-wait—do you think I’m that—that other glitch? Black clothes? Eye-patch and scarf?”

“Well who else—?!”

“Jackie, wait.” Chase reached over and slowly lowered Jackie’s arm so that the blade of the knife wasn’t pointing at Alt anymore. He did the same thing with his gun. “I think we should hear him out.”

“Hear him—” Jackie glared at Chase, clearly exasperated. “C’mon, this is clearly a trick.”

“Well, I think maybe it’s not,” Chase snapped back. “I mean...look at the effects. They look...different.” He made a vague sort of gesture to the glitches surrounding Alt. “Anti has always had the same ones, why change now?”

“Uh, how about to fool us?”

“Jackie, just...trust me on this.” Chase looked back at Alt. “So, you’re saying you saw Anti?”

“Y-yeah,” Alt stuttered. This rapid turn of events was making his head spin. “He found me, and he offered to help me because apparently I don’t know what I’m doing, and I told him to fuck off and ran away.”

“Good idea,” Chase grinned. “If you hadn’t done that, there’s a good chance you’d be dead right about now.”

“I—what?” Alt stared incredulously at Chase. “You’re serious?”

“Dead serious.” Chase nodded sadly. “The whole bunch of us have been targeted by him multiple times. He’s serious bad news. People around him disappear, and if they’re lucky they’ll reappear needing therapy. He’s been after a friend of ours for a while now, and eventually he’s gone after the rest of us. That’s why we all live together, safety in numbers, you know?”

Alt’s glitching had completely subsided, but he hadn’t even noticed. He knew there’d been something off about that guy. The way he laughed, the way he never blinked, the way he referred to Alt as “human” as if he wasn’t. And why he’d been so insistent on helping Alt mere moments after acting all pissy towards him. It must’ve been a trap.

“Look, dude.” Chase put the gun back into his belt. After a moment of reluctance, Jackie folded the blade back into the handle of the pocket knife, but didn’t put it away. “If Anti’s got his eye on you...you’re in trouble. You need to get somewhere safe.”

Alt looked around. “I don’t...know where safe is. I’m not from here.”

Chase and Jackie glanced at each other. “Well, I think it would be better if you...stayed with us, then?” Chase suggested hesitantly. “Not permanently if you don’t want to, but...we have some protection set up at our house. It...might help?”

Alt considered it, shoving his hands in his jacket pockets as he thought. It would be pretty nice to have a place to stay in this new city. And, well, it was Chase. Maybe not the same Chase, however that worked, but Chase nonetheless. He was a good guy. “Okay,” Alt breathed, nodding. “Maybe for a little.”

Chase smiled. “That’s great dude! We can head home now, cut the night short. This is a bit more important.” He laughed. “Oh, hey we, uh, never caught your name. What was it?”

“I’m Alt,” Alt said immediately.

“Alt? Cool name. C’mon, we can show you the way.”

“No,” Anti whispered, eye locked on the feed from the street’s CCTV camera. “Nò,̢ ͝n̵o,̧ no!̡” He rammed his fist into a nearby metal shelf, hard enough to scrape the skin off the knuckles. As always, he felt nothing. “You fucking i̷d͞io̵t̸!”

Sam flew over from their perch on top of one of the CPUs, gently rubbing against the curve of Anti’s neck, catlike. He absentmindedly reached up to stroke them with one finger. “I guess it’s not really his fault. He’s not from here, he doesn’t know. Not even the people who live here know. But...who trusts a total stranger just like that?!” Sometimes, despite his ability to step into the deep recesses of their minds, Anti felt he would never understand humans.

He leaned closer to the screen, debating whether or not it was a good idea to swoop in and get the kid out of there. It would certainly get him out of immediate danger, but then again, he might go running back into it afterwards, still refusing to accept Anti’s help. Not to mention it might paint him as even more of a bad guy. “What’s this guy’s deal anyway?” Anti muttered. “Where did he come from? Why can he glitch? You wouldn’t happen to know, would you, Sam?”

Despite the throwaway nature of the question, Sam zoomed up in front of Anti’s face, swishing their tail once. They’d agreed early on that that gesture meant yes. “Wait, you do? How? What’re the answers?”

Sam, of course, didn’t answer, though their iris squished flat in an are you kidding me? look. “Right, right, can’t talk.” Anti watched the kid and the two freaks on the screen for a moment. “Alright, guess it’s time to play the guessing game. You know the drill, Sam, I spit out random ideas and you confirm yes or no. Let’s make this one quick.”

By the time they reached the house, Alt had managed to fill in the other Jackie and Chase about everything that happened, all the way from the colorful lights that had taken him and Magnificent to the museum, to seeing that weird other almost-Magnificent in the black mask, to his encounter with Anti. They listened carefully, taking every detail. Or at least, Jackie did. Chase took a slight detour to text someone on his phone shortly after Alt mentioned the black-masked magician. But he listened after that.

“Here, we are, home sweet home,” Chase said, pulling open the door. “After you, new dude.”

Alt ducked inside, taking in the spacious living room with an archway leading to what looked like a dining room, and an open hallway ending in a flight of stairs. It looked friendly enough. But instinctively, his eyes darted about, taking in the entrances and the windows. There was a man sitting in one of the armchairs, wearing a red vest and a derby hat, face hidden behind a book. Alt glared at him. He seemed familiar.

“Hey, Jameson?” Jackie said, entering the house after Alt. “Put the book down, buddy. I think you should meet someone.”

The man put the book down, and Alt gasped. He looked like Dr. J. What was the deal with the lookalikes?! For his part, this Jameson looked just as shocked. But he smiled, and gave a gentle wave. {Hello, there.}

Alt shrieked, backing up quickly and running into the now-closed door. He scrambled for the doorknob. He couldn’t—not this again—

“Alt! What’s wrong?” Chase waved his hand in front of Alt’s panicked face. “What happened?”

“He’s in my head!” Alt cried. “I can’t—I c-can’t—”

“Whoa, dude, it’s fine!” Jackie placed a reassuring hand on Alt’s shoulder. “Jameson can’t talk, but he can project—you know, in a telepathic sense. He’s just saying hi.”

Jameson had closed his book and stood up by this point. He walked over to the coffee table and grabbed a pad of paper and a pen. He flipped through it until he found a blank page, and started writing.

“Look, I promise you it’s fine,” Chase said to Alt, his tone reassuring. “If he could mess about in there, he would’ve done it by now.”

“How do you know he hasn’t?!” Alt demanded.

Chase hesitated. “I guess we don’t. But that’s what trust is.” He paused, and looked back over to Jameson. “You sure?” he asked. Jameson nodded.

“What’s happening?!” The question came out sounding more panicked than he would’ve liked.

“It’s okay, Alt,” Jackie said. “Jameson just told us that since you’re uncomfortable with the whole...mind situation, then he won’t project to you. That’s what the paper is for.”

Jameson smiled again, a bit smaller this time. He held up the paper for Alt to see. Unfortunately, he was still across the room. Alt’s eyes narrowed. He glitched closer, causing Jameson to jump, and grabbed the pad straight out of his hands, reading what he’d written. I’m terribly sorry. If I’d known how you felt about it, I never would have tried in the first place.

Alt glared at Jameson. “Fine. Fucking fine, whatever.” He shoved the paper back at him, then glitched onto the couch, ending up curled into the side.

Jameson blinked, looking back and forth between Alt and Jackie and Chase. “It’s a long story,” Jackie sighed. “We should wait until everyone’s home to explain it.”

“Lemme guess,” Alt piped up. “You have another housemate who’s German? Goes by the nickname Schneep?”

“Yeah, actually,” Chase said, visibly surprised. “That’s the doc. He usually works late at the clinic. How did you know?”

Alt laughed. “Well, sounds like I didn’t know everything. Never would’ve pictured Schneep as the doctor. God, this is—this is fucked, dude.” He shivered. “I—I don’t know what’s going on. Everything is switched around and I don’t...I don’t know why.”

“I actually have a theory,” Jackie said, flopping down on the opposite end of the sofa than Alt. “But I should probably wait until at least Schneep is home.”

“What makes you think I am not already?”

Alt jumped at the sound, twisting in his spot to see a version of Schneep, wearing a white coat that was torn at the cuffs over a blue sweater, leaning against the arch to the dining room. There was a steaming coffee mug in one hand, and his blue eyes were rather intense through the pair of glasses. Alt just stared at him. He couldn’t have heard Jackie, could he?

“When did you get home?” Jackie asked. “I expected you to be—be working for some time now.”

“It was a slow day.” Schneep walked over and plopped into the other armchair. Jameson also sat, reclaiming his seat and leaving Chase the only one standing. “I decided to come home early. And it seems I was a good idea, because I would have missed that.” Schneep took a sip of the coffee, staring at Alt over the top of the rim. “You are not Anti. But I saw what you did, and that is what Anti does. I wonder why this could be.”

“Uh...I don’t know,” Alt said, honestly bewildered at this point by all the differences, yet all the similarities as well.

“Alright, time for my theory,” Jackie said, sitting up straight. “I think you’re from another dimension. A parallel universe.”

Everyone seemed to sharpen at that. “That’s possible?” Chase asked. “I thought that was science fiction.”

“So did I!” Jackie said excitedly. “But I can’t think of anything else. Alt seems to know who we are, but things are different, and he has the same powers as Anti but is also clearly not the same—even that Magnif-who cares could be explained. He kinda sounded like a different version of Marvin.”

“Marvin?” Alt asked.

“He’s...one of the housemates,” Chase admitted. “But look! He’s not the same as your version. He’s a bit of a bitch sometimes, but not, like, evil.”

Alt frowned. He hadn’t stuck around to see much beyond the first confrontation between the magicians, but that didn’t seem right. But...as he thought back on those memories, he started to wonder if he was wrong. The images were spiraling in front of his vision, and...maybe he’d been {wrong}? Maybe he’d been wrong. This Marvin dude was fighting Magnificent, after all. “Fine, whatever,” Alt grumbled, slumping further into the couch. “Just don’t make me look at his ugly face.”

“I doubt you’ll ever even see it,” Chase chuckled. “First of all, never takes that mask off, he’s a bit sensitive about it. Second of all, he’s pretty much a hermit, goes back and forth between the basement and his room and only comes out for food. Pretty easy to avoid the guy.”

Alt rolled his eyes. “Didn’t you guys say you had another one beside him?”

“Jack,” Jackie explained. “He’s asleep right now. Plays video games for a living on YouTube. Also kinda reclusive, doubt you’ll see him at all.”

Alt checked his bandanna, it had started to slip and needed readjusting. He didn’t like how these guys were talking like he’d already moved in. He was just staying with them for a little while, that was all. Just long enough to figure out what the deal with Anti was, how to get him off his trail, and how to get home. That was it. {But who knows how long that would take?} Could be a while...

“Do you guys...have an extra bedroom?” he asked. “I’m...kind of tired.” It was all of a sudden, too. The long night of adrenaline must’ve been wearing on him.

“You can use mine,” Chase offered. “I can crash on the couch while you’re staying.”

“Oh. Uh, thanks, man.”

“No problem, dude,” Chase gave a thumbs-up, accompanied by a cheesy grin. Alt couldn’t help but smile at that, not that they could see it under the bandanna. Guess some things were universal constants.

“Oh, before you go upstairs,” Schneep said. “Jameson is wondering if there are any others from your universe who came over, if that is indeed what happened. And I am as well, frankly.”

Alt thought back on it. “I don’t think so. Other than”—he made a face while simultaneously shuddering—”Magnificent. I haven’t been able to find any if they did come through. And...I think the two of us were the only ones in range? So...no, the answer’s no.”

Chase had no idea where he was, or how he’d gotten here. One moment, he and the others had been looking for Alt, after that stupid magician had gone after him again. They’d been getting close, he was sure of it, but then the next moment there had been a noise and a rush of colored light, and Chase had found himself standing in a park, completely alone.

This wasn’t the same city. He’d been patrolling it for years, he knew his city, and this wasn’t it. But the question was, where was he then? And where were the others?

After a while of wandering, he came across a drug store. It looked abandoned, or more accurately that surreal sort of empty that only came late at night when the white lights of the store showed off how few people there actually were. There was only one car in the parking lot, an old minivan. A woman with shoulder-length blonde curls was walking towards it, clutching a white paper bag in one hand and her keys in the other. Chase was hesitant to approach her, since it could easily come off the wrong way, but after a moment of silent thought, he decided it would be for the best. He’d just make sure to keep his distance.

He approached her slowly, staying a few feet away when he called out, “Excuse me?”

The woman dropped her paper bag in shock, two bottles of over-the-counter medicine falling out. She spun around, eyes wide. “Chase?!”

Chase gaped in turn. “Stacy?” He hadn’t recognized her. She looked...different. In tons of minute ways, but what he noticed was what he called the “tired parent look.” He’d seen it enough on Jackie, but never Stacy. She didn’t have kids, that’s why Jackie asked her to babysit for him. Did she? “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize it was you.”

Stacy didn’t say anything, just took a few steps toward her car. She adjusted her grip on her keys while also fumbling about with the clasp of her purse. She seemed...on edge. Scared, even. “Uh...” Chase glanced around. The parking lot was as empty as before. He pulled off his mask, thinking maybe that was the problem. “You okay there?”

“Fine!” Stacy squeaked. She’d managed to open the purse, and was now looking for something inside without taking her eyes away from Chase. “I was just—ah, Trev got sick and we were out of cold medicine, so I went to pick some up and I left them with a sitter—told the sitter to expect me back in twenty minutes, it’s already been twelve, I think—”

He had no idea what she was talking about. But he was picking up that she was...scared of him? Of him? That couldn’t be possible. Something must’ve been up. “Well, you dropped the bag of medicine,” he pointed out helpfully. “Here, I can help you pick it up—”

“No!” The word was more like an instinctive shriek. Stacy had pulled her phone out of her purse at this point. “I mean, thank you but I’m fine, I’m good, you don’t need to come any closer.”

“Stacy, is something wrong?” Chase asked, eyes lined with worry. “You’re acting strange.”

“No, I’m not! You—you—you know that.” There was a small flash from her phone’s camera, and Stacy immediately paled. “I-I-I-I didn’t mean to take a picture. You know how this works, new camera so confusing!” She laughed nervously. Her thumb was moving across the screen, tapping in very specific places.

“Stacy, if you’re in trouble, you know I can help you out.” Chase was starting to get desperate at this point. There was no way he could be misinterpreting this. She was scared. Of him. All he could think of was that maybe being seen with him was a risk of some sort. But what could she have gotten mixed up with for that to be a problem?

“I highly doubt that, Chase.” She made eye contact with him, and Chase realized she had been vaguely watching his hands the whole time. Her thumb had stopped. “Not when you know what the trouble is.”

“When I know what—?”

The question was cut off when Stacy suddenly dropped her phone with a small gasp. It landed screen-up on the asphalt of the parking lot. The phone was showing nothing but blank static. And then, with a fizz and a hiss, the static spread out from the phone, until it was a solid mass on the pavement. Chase gaped at it. The mass glitched, and morphed, and suddenly in a blink there was a man standing in front of Chase, dressed in dark colors except for the green scarf around his neck and the white eye-patch covering his right eye.

He looked familiar. But...it couldn’t be. “Alt?” Chase asked hesitantly.

The man looked at him and shook his head. “Not the one you know.” He turned to Stacy. “This is going to take some explaining, but basically this guy’s safe.”

“I’m safe?!” Chase repeated, bewildered. “Alt, what’s happening?”

“You shouldn’t c̛all̛ ̀me̷ ̶that ,” the other Alt said, his voice gaining an electronic filter. “It’ll probably just confuse you.”

Chase folded his arms. “I can’t possibly be more confused than I am right now.”

Stacy looked at the other Alt. “Anti? I’m...actually with him on that.”

Chase blinked. “An-Anti?” he repeated.

“My name,” the other Alt—Anti—confirmed. “The real name of your Alt, too, though I got the impression it wasn’t something he gave away easily—and now you’re staring at nothing like you’re having an existential crisis, great.”

It couldn’t be possible, could it? Alt couldn’t have been hiding that this entire time, right? Why? Chase turned around and put his head in his hands as he took this new fact in.

“Hey!” Anti pixillated into existence in front of him, glaring. “Crises later! We got more important shit to worry about!”

Stacy sighed. “He always does this.”

“Because it’s true! God, how can you get a̢n̶yt͏hin͝g̛ done like this?!” Anti grumbled indistinctively for a few more seconds, then fixed Chase with his best dead-eyed stare. It worked; Chase immediately stiffened. “Look, my fr—acquain—compan—fuck, I don’t know how we relate to each other, but their name is Sam and they told me you, and this Alt I met earlier, are from a parallel universe.”

Chase had to laugh at that.

“What are you...? I'͝m seŗi̴òus, Vlog-Man.”

“I know, I know you are, but...” Chase forced himself to stop “It’s just...god, that sounds so absurd. My life has truly become a comic book.”

“Well, you got the outfit for it, hero-type,” Anti said, giving Chase a once-over. “I hope you’re at least better than the one we have now.”

Stacy shuddered at that, just straightening up from where she’d bent over to pick up the bag she’d dropped. “Anti...if-if he’s alright, then I didn’t need to text you?”

“Not really. But it’s good practice for if the other one shows up.”

Chase looked between them, head turning rapidly. “Okay, so lemme get this straight. I am in...an alternate dimension. Alt is also here. You are not the Stacy I know, and you’re not...Alt. I’m assuming there’s another me here? Is that what got you so on edge, am I, like, a supervillain here?” He asked the last question with a crooked grin, but it slid off his face when Anti and Stacy still looked dead serious.

“Not exactly a supervillain, but not a shining example of a good person, either,” Anti drawled.

“Oh.” Chase fell silent for a moment, then started up again with what he thought was the most important topic. “You said you saw Alt? Was he okay?”

“He was,” Anti said grimly. “I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but Alt’s gotten himself into some real serious shit. He’s in danger.”

The five of them sat around the kitchen table. Jack was still asleep, and would be for a while, and this Alt person had just stopped moving around upstairs. “So, to get to the point of this,” Jackie opened up the meeting. “What’re we going to do about him?”

Marvin scowled, leaning back in his chair. “I don’t fucking know. The other me was an asshole, you think this other him is one too?”

“Actually I think he’s the good twin,” Chase laughed.

“I do not think he functions on the same rules,” Schneep said, staring at the ceiling like he could see through it to where Alt was sleeping. “For one thing, I do not think he needs to take the naptimes. And I thought that he was very immune to whatever it is Jamie does.”

{He is,} Jameson confirms. {Or at least, his mind is a beast to get through, walls made of titanium. This one, however...most unusual. His mind is like an open door, but surrounded by traps. Easy to get into, provided you don’t set any of them off.}

“You didn’t seem to have much trouble,” Marvin said, a smile ghosting around his lips.

{Well, I have a lot of practice,} Jameson replied with the same phantom smile. {And it seems someone left the door open in the first place.}

“Y’know, we still haven’t answered Jackie’s original question,” Chase said. “What are we going to do with him?”

Schneep shrugged. “Well, I was thinking that since last time we did not learn the hows and whys of the glitching, we could try again?”

“Henrik...” Jackie warned. “You know that Alt can probably die, right? Not like him.”

“I know, I know,” Schneep sighed. “But I think it would be worth a try.”

“I’m just gonna say that I’m still pissed you didn’t share like you were supposed to,” Marvin muttered.

“I was going to! It was a two-week arrangement! Is not my fault it started to fall apart and got out.”

“We’re not going to go full operating-room-magic-basement on Alt,” Chase said firmly. “Not when there’s a chance he could just tell us.”

{I agree with Chase,} Jameson said. {We will not resort to that until we have no other way.}

Jackie sighed. “Well, that’s better than nothing, I guess. And we’re not going to kill him.”

The others all murmured agreements. The real question was, why would they get rid of their one possible chance to figure out how Anti worked? Why would they pass up an opportunity to get rid of him forever?

In the corner of the dining room, a hidden camera buzzed, the sound too quiet for the human ear. Usually it didn’t do that. But a spark of dark green electricity had just invaded its systems, and it was reacting badly.

At least three from the parallel universe had made it over. But where had the third gone? And more importantly, were there any more? Only time would tell.

#ayyyy cliffhanger ending because im thinking this is just gonna be a thing now that sometimes happens #just like whenever i have inspiration motivation and time #because honestly there are so many potential relationships to explore and its like the possibilities!!!!!!#jacksepticeye #jacksepticeye fanfiction #jacksepticegos #septic egos #septic egos au #antisepticeye #jackieboy man #chase brody #jameson jackson #dr schneeplestein #septic eye sam #brigid writes fanfiction #septics inverted au #invertedau

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yeonchi · 5 years

Text

Thinking about the future of EDGN

I’ve never asked a lot out of my fans over the years, but to some of my close fans (you know who you are), I’d really appreciate some helpful advice because this is an important decision I’m making that will affect both you, the fans, and myself.

To cut a long story short for a tl;dr, I no longer enjoy posting about the voice languages in localised Japanese games because of some recent events and realisations and I want to retire from the English Dubbed Game News page altogether.

It’s been about five years since I started all this with the Koei Warriors Rant Series and since then, everything I’ve done that’s related to English dub has brought me nothing but hate. I know it’s a bit of an exaggeration and some of my close fans may have something to say to the contrary, but I’ve been feeling quite negative lately and because of that, I think it’s a brutally honest summary.

After ending the Dub Logistics series, I thought the one thing I could do to repay my fans for their support over the years was to continue posting on EDGN. Personally, I think I’ve done enough already and also, as I said in a post back in August, I’ve been having doubts about the future of the page and what I want to do with it given my current interests. There are several factors that led to me having these doubts, which I’ll be outlining after the break. (I can’t even put horizontal lines in my posts with the rich text editor now, thanks Tumblr)

1. I was never interested in any game outside of the Koei Warriors series or any game I played in the past (eg. Dissidia Final Fantasy).

This really shouldn’t be a surprise to my fans because in the past, I’ve rarely posted anything outside of the series I was interested in, including the aforementioned series. If I came across something by chance and liked it, then I would do some investigation into it, but these days, the spark just doesn’t want to light up anymore.

I’ve never really taken the chance to buy new games because my family doesn’t believe in buying things that aren’t important and as such, I took that mantra to heart. While I never brought a PS3, I did get a Nintendo Wii, but I traded it in later for a Wii U and not a PS4, which I still regret to this day. I pirated my PSP, DS and PC games (let’s face it, who doesn’t) and played with emulators on my computer. I only got a Steam account to play Team Fortress 2 (laggy though it was on my shitty computer) and I never brought anything from it, which made it difficult for me to add friends on there (not that they really cared in the end).

By extension, this applies to anime as well, which is the reason why I never post anything outside of the same few animes on the Waifu Network or on my Facebook pages. My belief on sexism in anime has also contributed to this disinterest; the only reason why I’m still posting the same few animes is because I’m still somewhat interested in them and I’m grateful for how they inspired some personal projects of mine.

2. Various factors have led me to lose interest in video games, including the Koei Warriors Series.

The reason why I started my dub crusade in the first place was because of Warriors Orochi 3 (Ultimate) and Samurai Warriors 4 not being dubbed. The reason why I decided to jump ship was because of Dynasty Warriors 9 being dubbed, just not with the same cast I had grown to love. I know that there were extenuating circumstances for the latter, but given everything that happened between that time, my hope that the old English voice cast (since Dynasty Warriors 4-6/Warriors Orochi 1-2) would return to voice that game (and other future games) was gone.

In addition to the previous factor, I started to find myself with more commitments than I had in past years, along with some different interests that I picked up along the way. At first, I didn’t feel like playing games because of my commitments, but eventually, it got to the point where I didn’t want to play most video games again because of the disappointment I’ve experienced from Koei Tecmo. Learning about all the things that AAA gaming companies do to reduce expenditure and increase revenue turned me off from video games as well. In my opinion, it wasn’t so much a boycott (per se) than it was a loss of interest.

3. The original group of people who inspired me to start writing these rants are now gone.

I know I’ve had other fans since the start of all this, but the original group had a special place in all this because of it. There were four people in the original group, who I met on Koei’s original Facebook page, and they were as follows:

The first one did comment on my older stuff, but he left quite early, possibly since DW8E’s release. I saw that he deactivated his account some time in 2017.

The second one had a YouTube channel and he was an admin on one of my Facebook pages for some time, but then he left after a period of inactivity without any explanation.

The third one was the more prominent because of his LGBT status and mental health issues. In the middle of 2015, he announced to everyone that he was deactivating his Facebook account because it was a burden on his mental health. He reactivated his account some time later, but he deactivated it again in September 2017 and hasn’t come back since. During that time, I saw a post from him stating that he was going to take a lot of pills and commit suicide. I reported it to Facebook in the hope that it might encourage him to find some help, even though I remember him stating that nothing works for him anymore. When I noticed that he hadn’t come back to Facebook months after he deactivated his account the second time, I assumed the worst.

The fourth one, also known as the family man or “the last one standing”, deactivated his account in June this year. We never really talked much, but as I said in this post, I’m still grateful to him for helping me find the new weapon and Musou information in DW8E when the Koei Wiki didn’t have it yet (because the game was just released at the time).

4. The impact of the feud’s aftermath still haunts me to this day.

When I agreed to end the feud on a mutual understanding a couple of years back, I promised myself that I would quickly move on from the troll behind it and not keep reminding myself of everything that happened. However, I’m a person that’s prone to anxiety when I think of worst-case-scenarios and at times, I found myself thinking about what would have happened had my Facebook account been deleted just because a troll couldn’t take the L when he got owned by someone half his age (compare that to Leafy who made terrible criticisms of people who are older than him, then claimed that he can hide behind the fact that he is younger than them). Him coming back out of nowhere earlier this year didn’t do any favours for anyone either. Regardless of that, I’ve got my bottom ground and I’ll continue to live on it regardless of what anyone else thinks of me.

I’d like to take a moment to digress and talk about cancel culture and political censorship. Because both parties in the feud weren’t exactly that popular (we had our own little fanbases, but that’s it), me and the other party “cancelling” each other (admittedly) didn’t seem to have as much an effect as we had hoped. Other factors that contributed to this could be that cancel culture (an extension to call-out culture) wasn’t that much of a thing two years ago and when the other party tried to cancel me, he made no attempt to spread the word to his fans. It was likely that he was trying to show mercy, but that doesn’t explain why he kept reporting my posts relating to him and current events in Hong Kong, knowing that I would eventually get banned if I didn’t call him out on it. I was as much a victim than I admittedly was an offender of cancel culture.

Following the feud, I’ve become wary of social media censorship because I experienced what it was like for someone to get petty and get people deplatformed by mass reporting them. Other pages like meme pages have suffered the same fate in the past (mostly because people take certain jokes too seriously), but despite my hopes, it didn’t seem like Facebook was going to do anything about the petty mass-reporting of those pages. Recently, however, I’ve been seeing news on tech companies being grilled over the censorship of conservatives and President Trump criticising them for the same thing. I’m not saying that I’m supporting Trump backing the pages that are being censored (conservative, far-right, alt-right, you name it), but I hope that this can hopefully extend to random meme pages being reported for petty reasons.

5. Ever since I decided to stop being toxic, I found myself conflicted when confronted with more toxic comments to the point that I’ve started to become paranoid over negative criticism.

When I decided to change the #NoDubNoBuy page to EDGN, I hoped that the hate towards my page would be reduced somewhat, but I never expected that it would be gone entirely. Since then, three people have made negative comments on the page; one was a girl who saw one of my posts being shared on a private group, misunderstood the (new) purpose of the page and despite her attitude, was still somewhat respectful, one was a Europoor dub hater from Spain (from what I’ve seen and learnt, Europeans tend to be sub fans and/or dub haters because of their English comprehension and ability to read subtitles) and one was an Americuck soyboy dub hater who pointed out about “crybaby fans” (”fans” as in the gatekeeping term “fake fans”, never mind my theory that people, especially men, who call other people, especially other men, “crybabies” are actually spreading toxic masculinity) who liked stuff to be Americanised but didn’t acknowledge the Japanese origins.

I’m gonna go off on a tangent and do a bit of an ad-homimem here (but it’s alright because I’m going to rebut his point next) and point out that I called the Americuck a soyboy because he had quite a long beard, but to be honest, if I called everyone who had beards “soyboys”, that would make people like Count Dankula and Sargon of Akkad “soyboys” as well, so it’d be a pretty slippery slope if I didn’t clarify who I was talking about.

Now, I’m going to move back on another tangent and rebut the soyboy’s point, because I think this is a pretty important point to address. No one is saying outright that they want Japanese games to be Americanised in terms of cultural references (if 4Kids has taught us anything). Saying that Americanisation is responsible for bad dubbing is a bit like blaming video games for causing violence. If someone says that they would like a game to be dubbed into English in localisation, then it is presumed that they want the dialogue to be dubbed in addition to the text being translated (or “dublated”). Any cultural changes made to the game or the dialogue are entirely the responsibility of those who made those changes, like the gaming companies who censor stuff for Western audiences, so if you’re complaining about a Japanese game being too “Americanised”, don’t take it out on dub fans because chances are that they didn’t want the dub to be too “Americanised” either.

Completing the square and going back to the original tangent, I didn’t post any of their comments to the dub hater comments album because I had deleted it after the feud in the hope that I wouldn’t be as toxic as I had been before. You can probably already see how toxic I would probably be if the above responses were posted on the page and directed back at them, which would mean that I’m not upholding myself to the standards I wanted to follow.

6. I’m becoming more and more concerned about current events to worry about things like English dubbing in video games.

If you’re someone who has unironically thought that I was making a big deal over something you thought was minor, then this is going to sound very ironic for you. From all these years of learning and research, I’ve attained an expansive world view and while I have made jokes about current events in the past to lighten the mood or express my anger, deep down I’m actually concerned about these things, particularly in regards to Hong Kong during this politically sensitive time.

For some reason, my desire to make posts has decreased because in addition to the above factors, I’ve been getting more and more worried about current affairs. Granted, the point of things like anime and video games and the Internet is to provide an escape from reality, but in the end, I guess that you have to face it whether you like it or not.

Making the decision to stop posting on EDGN hasn’t been an easy one, but all the factors I described above have gradually made it easier. Like the Undub page did, I had considered changing the focus of my page to merely report on the voice languages of games without saying whether we approve or reject it because it isn’t dubbed in English/Japanese; that is, we report on them with an unbiased viewpoint. Not adding excessively biased pro-dub comments on our posts has made it more neutral, but in the end, it didn’t stop the dub hater cucks. I should point out that one of the reasons why I wanted to change the #NoDubNoBuy page to EDGN was so that we could reduce the amount of hate we were getting.

What was the original goal of me starting this dub crusade? If you have read my rants in the past, then you will have picked up my hopes that Japanese games would be localised to the West with full Japanese and English dubbing and that if game companies couldn’t achieve that, then they should apologise and explain why. Would I say that I achieved or failed to achieve this goal? Not really, because over the years, I learnt a lot about the video game and voiceover industries and gradually realised that it’s not as straightforward as I had initially hoped. To be honest, it was kind of stupid of me to hope that gaming companies would say anything straightforward about this, but on the other hand, I learnt that gaming companies are like politicians as well; they say the things they want to say and not the things people want to hear.

To my fans, particularly my close fans, feel free to send me your opinions about my decision, however if you’re trying to change my mind, then I’m not sure if it can be changed so easily. If you think that I haven’t lived up to what you expect from me, then I’m sorry, but in the end, I have to think of myself as well.

If I could say one thing to the dub fanbase, I want to ask why no one else has ever tried to do something like EDGN. You have your groups and pages on social media and yet, it had to take two people pissed off with the dubbing direction of gaming companies to do it. Granted, that was how the Undub page started, with the lack of Japanese voices in localised games, and yet they didn’t get as much hate as my page did.

If there is anyone out there who wants to follow in my footsteps and make a page like EDGN, let me be the first to give you my blessing because I’m not going to be like the Undub page when they discovered us and point fingers for copying their posts when in the end, games are the same to everyone. While transparency regarding voice languages has increased over the years, there was never a place where dub fans could know about what games were dubbed in English. You don’t have to be like me and make a series of rants about why some games aren’t dubbed, because I’ve already done it, but instead, I suggest going the unbiased route as I stated earlier. Of course, you don’t have to follow my advice - it’s your page, after all.

My plan is to retire from EDGN at the end of the year. I have 12 more games in the backlog, all with English voices, and I’m hoping to post them all on the page before then. I probably won’t remove myself as an admin (because I think there’ll be some petty, obsessed cuck who’ll dig out my posts and make a rant series on me or something), but I’ll probably have it so that I can forget about the page as time goes on.

With this, my dub crusade has come to an end. Once again, to the fans, I’m sorry and I thank you for your support. As always, it is your choice as to whether you wish to continue following me, whether on Facebook or Tumblr, after my retirement.

#english dub #video games #japanese games #japanese voices

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pixeltownies · 6 years

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simself tag I was tagged by @fussysim I tag any of my followers that want to do this

take a shot every time I say “my boyfriend”

traits: goofball, foodie, clumsy aspiration: friend of the world 1. What is your full name? tristan egbert 2.What is your nickname? tris/tj 3. Birthday?‪ december 14‬ 4. What is your favorite book series? I don’t,. really read that often 5. Do you believe in Aliens or Ghosts? Y E S 6. Who is your favorite author? once again I really don’t read 7. What is your favorite radio station? pop + alt 8. What is your favorite flavor of anything? mango, fruit punch, etc etc, I like fruity things 9. What word would you use to describe something great or wonderful? “holy shit!” 10. What is your current favorite song? I have too many favs at all times for this 11. What is your favorite word? curse words lots of curse words 12. What is the last song you listened to? self esteem - the offspring 13. What TV show would you recommend for everyone to watch? ‪jane the virgin, how I met your mother, izombie, Gotham, hmu for more recs ‬ 14. What is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down? marvel movies + childhood movies 15. Do you play video games? mostly sims, I have others but I don’t have the accessibility to play them hh 16. What is your biggest fear? being alone 17. What is your best quality in your opinion? I’m good at listening and I’m a big people pleaser 18. What is your worst quality in your opinion? how lazy I am and how quickly I get peeved/angry 19. Do you like cats or dogs better? cats! 20. What is your favorite season? autumn 21. Are you in a relationship? yes :D 22. What is something you miss from your childhood? not much if I’m being honest 23. Who is your best friend? my boyfriend 24. What is your eye color? yellow, red, forest green and royal blue 25. What is your hair color? split pink & black but naturally dirty blonde 26. Who is someone you love? my mom + dad & my boyfriend & my siblings 27. Who is someone you trust? my boyfriend 28. Who is someone you think about Often? m y b o y f r I e n d 29. Are you currently excited about/for something? starting testosterone :) + meeting my boyfriend next year 30. What is your biggest obsession? uHh. cc, sims, Netflix, marvel, my boyfriend 31. what was your favorite tv show as a child? hannah montana, icarly, victorious, sam and cat, there are so many more but I’m absolutely blanking rn 32. Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to? I don’t really have many friends that are girls .. oops? 33. Are you superstitious? 50/50 34. Do you have any unusual phobias? none that I can really think of 35. Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? kind of both 36. What is your favorite hobby? PHOTOGRAPHYYYYY 37. What is the last book you read? i. don’t. read. 38. What is the last movie you watched? fantastic beasts with my boyfriend and his best friends 39. What musical Instruments do you play, if any? I am trying to learn guitar but I have ADHD/ADD and I have a hard time self-teaching 40. What is your favorite animal? panda, red pandas, fox, raccoon, turtle, cats. 41. What are your top 5 favorite Tumblr blogs that you follow? I just started out. pls. 42. What superpower do you wish you had? I just wish I wasn’t this dumb ((I’m keeping ur answer, I’m wheezing)) 43. When and where do you feel most at peace? when I’m on the phone with my boyfriend 44. What makes you smile? my boyfriend, sims, music, photography 45. What sports do you play, if any? none 46. What is your favorite drink? monster mango loco + pacific punch 47. When was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody? recently I keep a journal of notes to my boyfriend 48: Are you afraid of heights? y e s 49: What is your biggest pet peeve? misophonia, look it up 50. Have you ever been to a concert? yeah 51. Are you vegan/ vegetarian? no, I honestly don’t have the motivation or willpower to do it but when I move in with my boyfriend that’s gonna stop HDHBD 52. When you were little, what did you wanna be when you grew up? cosmetologist/ photographer 53: What fictional world would you like to live in? I can’t think of the name but the place in guardians of the galaxy 54. What is something you worry about? being alone, dying, people not liking me, embarrassing myself. 55. Are you scared of the dark? no, and yes 56. Do you like to sing? yes but I’m not good at it 57. Have you ever skipped school? I dropped out bc of it so yes 58. What is your favorite place on the planet? anywhere my boyfriend is 59. Where would you like to live? U.K. 60. Do you have any pets? 5 cats 61: Are you more of an early bird or a night owl? night owl 62: Do you like sunrises or sunsets better? sunset 63. Do you know how to drive? yes but I don’t have driving license oops 64. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? earbuds 65. Have you ever had braces? no, but I need them 66: What is your favorite genre of music? pop punk + indie + pop + basically anything but country, folk, classic dhsjsj shit like that ion like 67: Who is your hero? I don’t think I necessarily have one? 68: Do you read comic books? yes 69: What makes you most angry? misophonia, being blamed for things I didn’t do, not being listened to, being undermined, etc things of the sort 70. Do you prefer reading a book on an electronic device or on a real book? both tbh 71. What is your favorite subject in school? art 72. Do you have any siblings? 10 73. What was the last thing you bought? I can’t remember 74. How tall are you? 5 foot 4 75. Can you cook? not exactly 76. What are three things that you love? boyfriend, music, my cats 77. What are three things you hate? anxiety, fear, abandonment 78. Do you have more male or female friends? male 79. What is your sexual orientation? homosexual but panromantic 80. Where do you currently live? united states /: 81. Who was the last person you texted? my boyfriend 82. When was the last time you cried? idk!!! 83. Who is your favorite youtuber? jacksepticeye 84. Do you like to take selfies? yes I am very insecure but also very vain ((god we are the same person)) 85. What is your favorite app? twitter 86. What is your relationship to your parent(s)? kind of don’t like necessarily like them but I don’t hate them 87. What is your favorite foreign accent? British accents but this is biased bc of my boyfriend 88. What is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit? japan 89. What is your favorite number? 14 90. Can you juggle? nope 91. Are you religious? I don’t.. know… 92. Do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting? outer space, ocean scares tf out of me ((keeping this too)) 93. Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? impulsive but not daredevil 94. Are you allergic to anything? freshly cut grass tbh 95. Can you curl your tongue? no 96. Can you wiggle your ears? no 97. How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? normally when it happens if I catch on, if I didn’t realize I was wrong I admit when it’s pointed out 98. Do you prefer the forest or the beach? forest 99. What is your favorite piece of advice anyone has given you? uh I haven’t really gotten any 100. Are you a good liar? unfortunately yes 101. What is your Hogwarts house? hufflepuff 102. Do you talk to yourself? when I’m pissed 103. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? introvert 104. Do you keep a journal/diary? yes but they’re more like love notes to my boyfriend 105. Do you believe in second chances? yes and I give more than that bc I’m weak and too nice for existence 106: If you found a wallet full of money, what would you do? …. id be lying if I said I’d turn it in right away, I would have to contemplate that 107. Do you believe that people are capable of change? yes but only with help 108. Are you ticklish? yes 109. Have you ever been on a plane? nope, will be next year 110. Do you have any piercings? eyebrow, labret, septum, tongue, my ears are stretched, and I have more piercings planned 111. What fictional character do you wish were real? … uhhHhh I’m blanking 112. Do you have any tattoos? I have an XØ and a fiatp symbol on my left wrist 113. What is the best decision you’ve made in your life? following my boyfriend back when he followed me, to begin with 114. Do you believe in karma? yes for sure 115. Do you wear glasses or contacts? glasses 116. Do you want children? 2-3, I’m adopting though 117. Who is the smartest person you know? my boyfriend 118. What is your most embarrassing memory? I have many 119. Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? all the time 120. What color are most of your clothes? black or my fav colors 121. Do you like adventure? YES 122. Have you ever been on TV? nope 123. How old are you? 19!! 124. What is your favorite quote? If nothing ever changed, there’d be no butterflies. 125. Do you prefer sweet or savory foods? savory (and spicy!!!!!!)

#simself #about #non gameplay #my edit

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qqueenofhades · 6 years

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ACK. Hilary I need your thoughts on all this "Lucy is the Heir of Rittenhouse" reveal. Why did they cut it? Do you think it will come up again? How would Flynn react? Etc.

Welp.

I’ve only had a brief skim over reactions, etc, so if I say anything that anyone else already has, well, that’s just how that goes. But also I’m shook because… that is a fairly major info tidbit to drop as a deleted scene, and because it didn’t actually appear in an aired episode, it has a negotiable status as canon. Either we can take it as something Lucy knows and has (for obvious reasons) decided not to talk about, or something that has not yet happened. I’ll personally take it as the former, and that we’ll have it dealt with when she tells someone about it in season 3. Carol is dead, so there’s not really any way for her to learn it again or in another context. Supposedly they cut it for time, which is a little iffy to me, because it’s not a long scene, it’s a major reveal, and it would have added a whole new complexity to Lucy’s actions throughout the season and what she’s keeping back from the rest of the team. So yes.

I wrote several metas early in the year and then after 2x10 about how Lucy was leaning into her Rittenhouse heritage/being willing to use some of their same tactics, but in the exact opposite purpose. This, as we’ve pointed out, adds a whole new context to 1x10, 2x01, and 2x10 at least, as well as arguably 2x02 and 2x04 and other moments where we see Lucy really dead set on “we need to do this and I don’t necessarily have time to play nice and I’m entirely cool with possibly dying if so.” Especially in the jail scene with Flynn in 2x02 and then the jail scene with Carol (where Lucy is imprisoned in Salem) in 2x04 and so on. This also answers the fairly major plot hole of why future!lLucy wouldn’t just tell Flynn that David Rittenhouse was one man in the 18th century and have it end right there. (It doesn’t answer why our Lucy doesn’t know about David Rittenhouse anyway, since he was a fairly well-known intellectual figure and she would definitely have heard of him, since she knows even obscure people/events, but anyway.) She can’t tell Flynn that, because her entire existence depends on it, and they need to find a way to beat Rittenhouse without erasing her – which is hella difficult since she’s descended directly from the dude. After all, if you kill David and John, maybe Rittenhouse doesn’t exist, but neither does Lucy, as well as God knows what else. That also doesn’t stop David’s followers, and anyway, yes. So that is a clever way to answer the obvious question of why they couldn’t just go there and kill David right away.

Also, I’d just like to point out that in terms of Lucy’s relationship(s) with Flynn and Wyatt, this is a revelation that is directly important for… well, only one of them. It doesn’t really make a difference for Lucy’s relationship with Wyatt if this is the case or not. Indeed, we have seen Wyatt explicitly know that Jessica was Rittenhouse, and still choose her/beg her to come back with him. Stopping Rittenhouse is not personal to Wyatt. It is the job he’s been recruited to do and has maybe become a little more personal after what happened with Jess, but that still didn’t stop him from wanting Jessica as long as she was an option, Rittenhouse ties or otherwise. He only attempted to go back to Lucy with the ill-advised ILY after that had been ruled out, and after making further efforts (telling Flynn not to shoot Jessica) to preserve the possibility of a reconciliation. So honestly, as it stands in canon text, if presented with Rittenhouse or Lucy, Wyatt chooses Rittenhouse. It’s even the case with him not shooting Emma or Carol when he had the chance – yes, it had to do with his feelings for Lucy, but both times, it’s clear that Lucy’s opinion was that she wanted him to go for it (she wanted him to shoot Emma in 2x05, she tries to do it in 2x10, she’s clearly dismayed when Wyatt tells her that her mother got away in 2x06 – she doesn’t want Carol dead, but she wants her stopped). Wyatt and Lucy care for each other, but they have a fundamental disconnect on what they are willing to do to stop RH, and Wyatt has explictly or implicitly chosen Rittenhouse over Lucy at repeated moments. (Oh hello, Shawn Ryan mentioning that Flynn understands Lucy on a deeper level than Wyatt does.)

In contrast, Flynn knows that Lucy is Rittenhouse on both sides of the family, but he doesn’t know that she’s descended from THE Rittenhouses. Stopping Rittenhouse has always been intensely personal for Flynn and at the core of his character motivation; indeed, in season 1, he went for the “stop Rittenhouse” option at the expense of repeatedly messing it up with trying to get Lucy to join him. That is what makes it more narratively significant that he has increasingly moved to choosing Lucy over that vengeance quest, and when given the explicit opportunity to do in 2x10 what he failed to do in 1x10 (and seriously, this makes the parallel between these episodes EVEN MORE than it was), he doesn’t. There is no question or ambiguity in the narrative: when presented with the chance to kill Emma or comfort Lucy, Flynn doesn’t hesitate an instant in choosing the latter. I mentioned in one of my earlier metas that Flynn and Wyatt physically and emotionally switch places in Lucy’s life in 2x03, when Flynn struts into the bunker and Wyatt runs out to Jess. This is also the case here. In season 1, Wyatt chooses Lucy over Rittenhouse, mostly implicitly because he doesn’t know what the major picture is until near the end of the season. In season 2, Wyatt chooses Rittenhouse over Lucy. In season 1, Flynn chooses stopping Rittenhouse over Lucy as a person; in season 2, he EXPLICITLY chooses Lucy as a person over stopping Rittenhouse. He doesn’t kill Emma in 2x07 and 2x10 directly because of Lucy. Lucy is never a second choice or a lesser focus for Flynn in s2 (as she is for Wyatt all-post 2x03).

Once again: in season 2, Wyatt chooses Jessica (who is/represents Rittenhouse) and honestly, has no real major character reason to do otherwise. Flynn chooses Lucy, who is also Rittenhouse genetically, but represents a complete repudiation of them, and does so despite having a major character reason (the death of his wife and daughter; his entire vengeance quest) to do otherwise. Furthermore, Wyatt and Lucy don’t agree on what kind of danger Rittenhouse is and what they’re willing to do to end it/the personal price they’re willing to pay. Wyatt isn’t willing to really sacrifice anything at this point whatsoever, whereas Lucy was prepared to wipe her entire family and identity (and life!) from existence by blowing up the Mothership in 2x01. Flynn has known from the start the danger that Rittenhouse is, Lucy has come more and more around to his view, and they agree on the sacrifice that will be necessary.

In short, textually, Lucy is moving closer and closer to alignment with one of these men, and away from the other (not hate, but just a simple reflection of how both dynamics developed in season 2). Wyatt has (mostly indirectly) refused to NOT choose Rittenhouse over Lucy, and has done so to support his interests. Flynn has directly refused to NOT choose Lucy over Rittenhouse, and at cost to his interests. That is a more important/weighty decision, character-wise. So as noted, this is a major piece of character/plot information (that Lucy is the Heir of Slytherin) and it deepens and twists and fleshes out her connection with Flynn, and the importance of him choosing her, despite her heritage and the pain that Rittenhouse has personally caused him. It doesn’t really do anything of comparable importance to her connection with Wyatt, and if anything, weakens it. This is Lucy’s entire family and existence at stake, but she’s still willing to give it all up, whereas Wyatt is not willing to give up anything, even this alt-version of his wife after he explicitly learns she’s Rittenhouse and always has been. (And again – this isn’t hate and I don’t think he should have just dropped his fight for Jessica, since that’s been his character motivation since the pilot, but it’s… right there in the text.)

Now that Carol is dead, Lucy is in fact (as far as we know) the only living heir of the original Rittenhouse bloodline. That’s… a lot to deal with. She is in fact the princess, as Emma keeps calling her. At some point in season 3 (WHEN NBC? WHEN?) that will need to be dealt with. It doesn’t really change or develop her connection with Wyatt (as I said, if anything, it puts them on even more unequal footing in what they’re willing to do/commit) but with Flynn? …. Yeah. He loves her, but he’s gonna be startled by it, and it adds a whole new dimension to all their past interactions (especially 1x10 and 2x10) and their development and their partnership to take down Rittenhouse (the literal princess/last blood heir and their greatest nemesis), the symbolism of that, the decisions that they have made in that interest, and for their characters both together and apart, and honestly. That is the kind of romantic conflict/angst spanner I’d expect/that makes more sense for the couple that’s going forward, not back.

#lucy x flynn #garcy #wyatt critical #timeless meta #i am not sure if this makes sense?#but anyway yes #welp #anonymous #ask

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arplis · 4 years

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Arplis - News: The 50 Best Alt-Rock Love Song

s Not all love songs are romantic. Not all love songs are even happy. It all depends on your definition of the term. For every “My Girl” or “Your Song,” there’s at least one track with a nuanced take on the darker, more complicated sides of love — the drama of a long-term relationship, the fear of losing a partner, the void left in love’s wake. Many of those songs fall under the admittedly broad umbrella of “alt-rock.” So to mark Valentine’s Day, we decided to gather 50 of our favorite “love songs” in the genre — both conventional and otherwise. Throughout this list, you’ll find lines about blooming romance and marital bliss. You’ll also find nods to drug addiction and car crashes. There’s something for everyone. – Ryan Reed 50. that dog. – “I’m Gonna See You” You take the good, you take the bad. You settle in for the longest haul, one that’s meant to end whenever one partner or the other passes away. Sunny, glossy and droll, “I’m Gonna See You” fairly tingles the spine; there’s an underlying optimism about marriage and domestic life here that’s leavened by level-headedness and firm realism. that dog. set the controls firmly to mid-tempo, as placid frontwoman Anna Waronker serenades an unknown subject who might as well murmur every verse and chorus right back at her: “I’m gonna see you in the morning / I’m gonna see you when you’re uptight / I’m gonna see you when you’re boring / I’m gonna see you every night.” – Raymond Cummings 49. PJ Harvey (featuring Thom Yorke) – “This Mess We’re In” PJ Harvey didn’t need Radiohead’s enigmatic frontman to sell this bleakly beautiful 2000 duet. But it’s chilling — and slightly dislocating — to hear these worlds collide, resulting in a hall-of-fame-caliber swirl of romantic misery. “I’d long been interested in the idea of somebody else singing a whole song on a record of mine, to have a very different dimension brought in by somebody else’s voice,” Harvey told the Los Angeles Times. “It adds so much dynamic within the record to have this other character coming in.” And while it’s still hilarious to hear Yorke, master of the abstract, sing lines this nakedly sensual (“I dream of making love to you now, baby”), he inhabits that character with ease, his falsetto offering a ghostly counterpoint to Harvey’s measured spoken word. – Ryan Reed 48. Yellowcard – “Ocean Avenue” There’s love, sure, but “Ocean Avenue” is also an anthem of youth, recklessness and pop-punk. Something about the chugging riffs, infectious chorus and cliche lyrics made it an instant classic destined to soundtrack every Emo Nite. The highlight is, of course, the sentiment that’s as predictable as everything else: “If I could find you now things would get better / We could leave this town and run forever.” Just like Boys Like Girls’ later pop-punk gem “The Great Escape,” “Ocean Avenue” is built on one of rock’s most reliably romantic images: running away with a vague lover from a dreary hometown into life’s endless possibilities. – Danielle Chelosky Credit: Capitol 47. Future Islands – “Walking Through That Door” This is Future Islands in the key of “I Want to Break Free.” Of all the underdog anthems the synth-pop trio churn out, this gem — from 2010’s overlooked In Evening Air — is their most pure. The beauty lies in Gerrit Welmers’ quivering keys, which sound like they landed on Earth from a ’50s sci-fi flick. They spiral higher and faster, as singer Samuel T. Herring absolves us of the shadows we cling to; all the lonely nights that “fall oh-so-slow.” “I want to be the one to help you find those dreams,” Herring sings, eerily calm, like a mountaintop shaman who’s become enlightened in the rugged terrain. “Walking Through That Door” has a mystical vibe that takes whatever’s in your heart and makes you believe in it harder. – Sarah Grant 46. Liz Phair – “Supernova” Liz Phair is in devotion mode, packing more similes into one rock love song than an entire book of Shakespeare sonnets. “Your eyelashes sparkle like gilded grass,” she sings, “and your lips are sweet and slippery like a cherub’s bare, wet ass.” That’s just the first verse. “Supernova” was Phair’s rollicking first single from Whip-Smart, the follow-up to her murky masterpiece Exile in Guyville. With its trampolining guitars and Phair’s heart wide open, it signaled a whole new Liz dimension — her romantic period — where we could pour out our hearts with fists held high, shouting “and you fuck like a volcano, and you’re everything to me.” A declaration that would only occur to an ineffably cool 27-year-old in 1994. – S.G. Credit: Matador / Atlantic 45. The Stranglers – “Golden Brown” The stately, baroque-pop jangle of “Golden Brown” diverged from the English band’s core sound: prototypical pub-punkers stumbling into the electronics section of the local music store. The Stranglers slowly matured into the New Wave outfit of their pinnacle — but, in this case, take a deviant direction. A harpsichord plays the central melody as a luminous phased synth corresponds: dropping and rising in octaves, overall creating an enthralling quasi-waltz (with periodic bars in 7/8 time). It’s a ballad to his beatific (and lyrically ambiguous) “golden brown,” a finer temptress arranged in a seamless weaving of verse into bridge into the chorus — all executed in a timbre echoing John Lennon. Such a gorgeous song from a band with such a contrary name. – Logan Blake 44. Nine Inch Nails – “The Perfect Drug” The doomed romance of Trent Reznor’s lyrics can often make love sound like a desperate chemical dependency — or make actual drug addiction sound like an irresistible seduction. “The Perfect Drug,” written for David Lynch’s 1997 film, Lost Highway, muddies the waters even more than usual, particularly with Mark Romanek’s absinthe-themed video. Reznor has performed the song live sparingly and reportedly admitted in 2005 that it “probably wouldn’t be in the top hundred” of the tracks he’s written. Still, it’s hard not to get caught up in the adrenaline rush of one of the fastest, most drum’n’bass-influenced songs in the Nine Inch Nails catalog. – Al Shipley Credit: Nothing 43. Pulp – “Something Changed” “Something Changed” is a prayer for those of us whose love language is canceling plans. Over rolling guitars and heavenly synths, Jarvis Cocker sings about the precious, random decisions that we make every day, having no idea of what’s at stake. “I could have stayed at home and gone to bed … you might have changed your mind and seen your friend.” In a Melody Maker interview, Cocker said that the song’s retrospective lyrics came from trying to remember why he wrote this song in the first place back in 1984 — years before releasing it as a single in 1996. Twenty-five years later, amid the doldrums of quarantine, “Something Changed” is like a redemption song for those of us who took the outside world for granted. As Jarve wisely said: “The worst thing about having a schedule and a timetable is that there’s less chance for unexpected things to happen.” – S.G. Credit: Island 42. Buzzcocks – “Ever Fallen in Love (With Someone You Shouldn’t’ve)” If the answer to the question posed in the song title is “no,” check your pulse. You’re not alive. Or perhaps you’re extremely lucky. Just wait — as Robert Plant once sang, “Your Time Is Gonna Come.” The gist of the lyrics: “You spurn my natural emotions / You make me feel like dirt and I’m hurt” is as plainspoken as the song itself, written in 1978 by Buzzcocks’ Pete Shelley. Flaunting a perfect, dysfunctional lyrical kicker (“And if I start a commotion / I run the risk of losing you, and that’s worse”), “Ever Fallen in Love” becomes a hooky package of pop-punk energy and precise, pithy lyrics. This “pansexual punk anthem” (as one critic coined it) was the Buzzcocks’ biggest hit, and very rightly so. – Katherine Turman Credit: United Artists 41. Morphine – “In Spite of Me” Boston trio Morphine was known for the low, sonorous sounds of Mark Sandman’s two-string slide bass and Dana Colley’s baritone sax. But Sandman would occasionally throw in a spare acoustic track like “In Spite of Me,” the side one closer to their 1993 magnum opus, Cure For Pain, featuring beautifully fluttering mandolin by Jimmy Ryan. “In Spite of Me” is a bittersweet paean to someone who left the narrator behind long ago, but Sandman’s half-whispered vocal radiates with the fond memories of a shared history: “Last night I told a stranger all about you / They smiled patiently with disbelief.” – A.S. 40. The Breeders – “Do You Love Me Now” “Does love ever end?” That’s the central question of “Do You Love Me Now,” Kim and Kelly Deal’s meditation on the often open-ended nature of past romance. Just when you think you’re finally over a relationship and have completely moved on, those familiar feelings slowly sidle back up to you like Josephine Wiggs’ slinking bass line. Pretty soon you might find yourself reaching for your phone, scrolling through photos and wondering what your old flame is doing right about now. If that happens, don’t worry — it’s perfectly natural. Here’s a helpful piece of advice from your friends at SPIN: Don’t text your ex. – John Paul Bullock 39. Pearl Jam – “Last Kiss” By 1998, Pearl Jam had left radio behind. Sure, “Given to Fly” was a hit and Yield ended up one of their best albums, but the mainstream was mostly in the rearview mirror until this throwaway cover. During a Seattle show that May, Eddie Vedder told the crowd that he found an old single for $.99 the previous day and stayed up listening to it all night. Then the band debuted their take on “Last Kiss,” the Wayne Cochran ballad popularized by J. Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers in 1964. The song is so breezy and catchy, many fans are still oblivious to the sad lyrics, which chronicle a car accident that kills the narrator’s girlfriend (“Oh where, oh where can my baby be? / The Lord took her away from me”). Pearl Jam recorded a version during soundcheck before a Maryland gig, releasing it for Ten Club members. But that recording spread like wildfire and eventually peaked at No. 2 on the Billboard 200. Strangely, this left-field cover wound up the biggest hit of Pearl Jam’s career. – Daniel Kohn Credit: Epic 38. Bloc Party – “Blue Light” “I still feel you in the taste of cigarettes,” sings Kele Okereke over divine splatters of guitar reverb and the heartbeat click-clack of a snare rim and kick drum. Bits of this person — seemingly a former lover — linger in the minute sensory details of everyday life. Reminders are everywhere: “You’ll find it hiding in shadows / You’ll find it hiding in cupboards.” The emotional centerpiece of Bloc Party’s debut LP, 2005’s Silent Alarm, “Blue Light” conjures the feeling of being fully adrift in sadness — you’ve become so accustomed to melancholy, it’s now your home. Just as Okereke croons about a mysterious “gentlest feeling,” the song ironically becomes un-gentle, guitars and drums spiraling upward into a sonic and emotional crescendo. – R.R. 37. Lifehouse – “Hanging By a Moment” Lots of love songs have a spiritual component: Peter Gabriel was inspired to write “In Your Eyes” — perhaps the greatest slice of pop romance ever written, but not really “alt-rock” enough for this list — to reflect that common ambiguity in African music. With Lifehouse’s “Hanging By a Moment,” frontman Jason Wade landed at a similar duality. “I knew at the end of it that it was a love song, and I kind of come from that world, so it can be interpreted as a spiritual song or a love song,” he told Billboard in 2017. “I feel like people have just been taking it for whatever they want it to be through the years.” Both interpretations hold water: The narrator is “starving for truth,” perhaps in a religious sense. But on the chorus, they’re “standing here until you make me move” — an image that, coincidentally, calls to mind the “In Your Eyes” boombox scene from Say Anything. Either way, it’s a tearjerker. – R.R. Credit: DreamWorks 36. Alabama Shakes – “Gimme All Your Love” Lyrically, this one’s as cut and dried as it comes: Brittany Howard, the powerhouse singer of Alabama Shakes, wants the full relationship experience — no emotional shortcuts. “So much is going on / But you can always come around,” she sings gently, her voice somewhat muffled amid the glitchy drums and gleaming keys. “Why don’t you sit with me for just a little while? / Tell me, what’s wrong.” Then on the chorus, she sounds enraptured in contrast, screaming the titular phrase between some “woo”s that sound like a soulful Ric Flair. Is complete commitment so much to ask? – R.R. 35. A Flock of Seagulls – “Space Age Love Song” New Wave music, particularly synthpop, tended to be lyrically cold, detached and unsentimental — more concerned with pessimism than romance. But “Space Age Love Song,” A Flock of Seagulls’ 1982 hit, is one of those unique exceptions. Amid Mike Score’s wistful singing and atmospheric synths and Paul Reynolds’ soaring guitar, the lyrics are direct and tender rather than aloof, accompanied by its recognizable melodic refrain: “I was falling in love.” In a 2018 PopMatters interview, Score said the song was about intimacy: “When you meet somebody there is an instant eye contact if the chemistry is right. If everything is right, you catch their eye…that whole ‘across the crowded room/caught your eye’ thing. The lyrics explain that: ‘I saw your eyes and you made me smile.'” Sci-fi and love never sounded so good together. – David Chiu Credit: Jive 34. The Pretenders – “Talk of the Town” “I had in mind this kid who used to stand outside the soundchecks on our first tour, and I never spoke to him,” Chrissie Hynde once recalled, detailing this Beatles-y New Wave anthem from 1980. “And I remember the last time I saw him, I just left him standing in the snow. I never had anything to say to him. And I kinda wrote this for him.” That backstory adds more intrigue to her already-fascinating lyrics, which seem to channel youthful longing for a person outside one’s grasp. “I watch you still from a distance then go / Back to my room,” she quivers over the bright guitar changes. “You never know I want you.” – R.R. 33. Incubus – “Dig” Few alt-rock frontmen have embraced heartthrob status more naturally than Incubus singer Brandon Boyd, who helped transform the California nü-metal band into multi-platinum crossover stars with his washboard abs and a propensity to flirtatiously ad-lib the word “girl” like an R&B singer. But there’s always been a philosophical bent to Boyd’s most romantic songs, and “Dig,” as he explained in the band bio for 2006’s Light Grenades, “speaks to the importance of forgiveness and compassion.” But the song’s headier lyrics don’t get in the way of the lighter-waving catharsis of Boyd belting out, “We’ll always have each other when everything else is gone.” - A.S. 32. Beach House – “Lazuli” If “Harvest Moon” had an alien twin from Baltimore, it might sound something like “Lazuli” — Beach House’s most romantic song, which highlights their 2012 album, Bloom. Alex Scally begins with a loping arpeggio and spray of synth as the story unfurls. “In the blue of this life, where it ends in the night / When you couldn’t see, you would come for me,” Victoria Legrand bellows, sounding warm, wise and oddly reminiscent of Nat King Cole. The lyrics float in and out of abstraction, like twisting a kaleidoscope. The synths form little ripples around her voice. In this vein, “Lazuli,” feels like an ode to communing with nature; a testament to every tiny particle that we can’t see. Who knows? Being in a perpetual state of wonder is the Beach House way, and it’s the true magic of this song. As Legrand reminds us in her dreamy warble, “you can’t be replaced.” – S.G. 31. Weezer – “Perfect Situation” From the dramatic intro — which this Fearless-era Taylor Swift song oddly resembles — it’s clear what this one is about. Then again, it’s usually what Weezer songs are about: desperation, longing, love gone wrong. “Perfect Situation,” though, is less lyrically specific than many of the band’s tracks — they keep the words simple and carefully chosen here, with Rivers Cuomo just enunciating “Singing oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh” on the chorus. The instruments do most of the talking, and the most Cuomo reveals is on the kind-of-hot lines: “Get your hands off the girl / Can’t you see that she belongs to me?” – Danielle Chelosky 30. The Temper Trap – “Sweet Disposition” First off, who gives a fuck that the echoing guitar sounds like the Edge’s best unused riff? And so what if the song itself is still a go-to for dumb TV ads and rom-coms? It’s easy to poke fun at this Australian quartet because they unashamedly swing for a grand slam with almost every at-bat, but “Sweet Disposition” is the kind of heart-tugging big-chorus rock song only the most jaded among us can brush aside. Part of it’s the expressive delivery of frontman Dougy Mandagi, who wrangles maximum earnestness from each falsetto swoop and hint of vibrato. And the words are perfectly bare and unpretentious. “Just stay there / ‘Cause I’ll be coming over,” he sings. “While our blood’s still young / It’s so young, it runs / Won’t stop ’til it’s over.” – R.R. Credit: TIME 29.��Band of Horses – “No One’s Gonna Love You” Few “love songs” open with the image of a mutilated body part: “It’s looking like a limb torn off / Or altogether just taken apart,” Ben Bridwell yelps over rippling electric guitars. “No One’s Gonna Love You” feels romantic — the atmospheric arrangement, the pained way Bridwell sings throughout. And certain lyrics, like the titular phrase, sound deceptively sweet. But this one’s complicated: The narrator seems to be still helplessly in love (“And anything to make you smile”), even with the relationship “tumbling” through an “endless fall.” Play this one for your “first dance” wedding song and scan the crowd for puzzled faces. – R.R. Credit: Sub Pop 28. The White Stripes – “I Just Don’t Know What to Do With Myself” Can we trust a love-lost song from a man who pretended his one-time wife was his sister? Why is said sister-wife, Meg White, crying on the cover of 2003’s Elephant? And why is Kate Moss pole-dancing in the video? No matter the answer to these rhetorical questions, ”I Just Don’t Know What to Do With Myself” is a great song, and as sung by Jack White, the definitive version. (It was written by Burt Bacharach and lyricist Hal David — and previously, most notably covered by Dusty Springfield, Dionne Warwick and Issac Hayes, who drew it out to seven minutes.) White’s spare, angsty voice and guitar reflects the song’s desperate, edgy feeling of painful limbo as two are wrenched into one lonely leftover. The tune was written in 1962, but it’s still timeless — and especially gut-wrenching when White delivers it with all the (hurt) feels. – K.T. Credit: XL 27. My Morning Jacket – “Steam Engine” Jim James digs deeper than superficial attraction on this dreamy, seven-minute ballad from It Still Moves. “So I do believe / None of this is physical / At least not to me,” he sings, his voice bathed in barn reverb. He is human, admitting later on, “Your skin looks good in moonlight.” But like the band’s slow-building sway, his definition of love is still admirably cosmic. “It’s about falling in love with someone because of the way they make you feel, as opposed to them wearing tight jeans and being hot,” he told Nude as the News in 2003. “I’m just trying to escape from the fuckin’ constant, physically driven fashion show that the world has become.” – R.R. 26. R.E.M. – “At My Most Beautiful” Gently affectionate, direct and indelible, the standout third single from R.E.M.’s first post-Bill Berry LP revels in romantic mundanity. A sigh calibrated to elicit endless sighs, “At My Most Beautiful” adopts orchestral-era Beach Boys as its guiding muse, with guitar, piano, organ and cello forming a warm, pastel whorl. The sincere tenderness in Michael Stipe’s vocal scribbles extra feelings between the lines of his actual lyrics, which adore but stop short of the saccharine. “You always say your name,” he purrs, “Like I wouldn’t know it’s you, at your most beautiful.” – R.C. Credit: Warner Bros. 25. Siouxsie & the Banshees – “The Last Beat of My Heart” Siouxsie Sioux sings nature metaphors (“In the sharp gust of love, my memory stirred / When time wreathed a rose, a garland of shame”) over a slow-climbing swell of accordion and muted tom-tom thump. A perfect marriage of words and atmosphere, each drawing out romance from the other. “It’s one of my favorite Siouxsie and the Banshees songs, and [DeVotchKa] covered it very well,” the Decemberists’ Colin Meloy told Pitchfork in 2006.”It kind of bums me out that they got to that cover before I did. Very smart choice.” – R.R. Credit: Wonderland / Polydor 24. Blink-182 – “All the Small Things” For Valentine’s Day 2000, there had to be at least one guy in a Hurley T-shirt and Dickies who wrote this in a card to his high school girlfriend, thinking it was so sick: “Keep your lips still, I’ll be your thrill, the night will go on, my little windmill.” Blink’s biggest hit has its goofy, sappy moments: “She left me roses by the stairs, surprises let me know she cares.” But there’s some uncertainty there too: Tom DeLonge knows this girl will be at his show, watching and waiting, but also…commiserating. Did she feel pity for him? Maybe we shouldn’t think too much about “All The Small Things,” considering DeLonge wrote it specifically to be played on the radio, with all those Ramones-y “na-na-na’s” filled in so he wouldn’t need to write more lyrics. – Bobby Olivier Credit: MCA 23. Arcade Fire – “Neighborhood #1 (Tunnels)” Here’s something I’ve never understood: So…Win Butler is singing about digging a tunnel between his and his lover’s homes — underground romance, adorable — but then he wails, “You climb out of the chimney and meet me in the middle, the middle of the town.” Why dig the fucking tunnel when she’s just gonna use the chimney to meet up? And another thing! When he sings, “Then our skin gets thicker from living out in the snow” — couldn’t they have sought shelter in the tunnel during inclement weather? Listen, I know it’s the band’s debut single and revered as one of the greatest indie-rock songs of the last 20 years, blah blah. It’s a sweeping, bouncy tune, sure, but I need answers, damn it! – B.O. 22. Smashing Pumpkins – “Luna” In the liner notes of the 2011 Siamese Dream reissue, Billy Corgan writes that this blissful dream-pop ballad chronicles his love for “someone [who] doesn’t love me.” He doesn’t directly specify this person, but he did famously date Courtney Love, who once claimed that almost all of the album was written about her. We’re not going to draw any conclusions. “I sing a love song in an empty room,” Corgan continued, detailing how he wrote the tune. “It is for the moon. It can never be for the one you love.” Regardless, “love song for the moon” just sounds cooler. – R.R. 21. Mazzy Star – “Fade Into You” During the mid-’90s alt boom, a bunch of bands on the peripheral had their moments of mainstream success. Mazzy Star’s biggest song, the moody and melodic “Fade Into You,” blends dream-pop and alt-country twang, led by Hope Sandoval’s luscious vocals. The singer’s lyrics, a touchstone of peak Gen X, seem to document a relationship with a narcissistic person who can’t be reached. And that dichotomy between romantic longing and melancholy is what makes “Fade Into You” so relatable. – D.K. Credit: Capitol 20. The Cardigans – “Lovefool” You likely know the hook by heart from incessant radio airplay. Released in the mid-’90s, it’s one of those songs that summons its zeitgeist, and it’s since remained one of the most timeless (and bittersweet) pop-rock palliatives. Lead singer Nina Persson both coquettishly and wistfully begs for her love to be requited. It’s all voluptuous rouge lips and batting cat eyes, soft around the edges with sharp guitar chops and velvety synth concords. It’s the marriage of a cold, haphazard lament in a catchy pop structure with a New Wave undercurrent all held together in kitschy saturation. Nothing comes closer to the platonic ideal of pop. – L.B. Credit: Stockholm 19. Jeff Buckley – “Lover, You Should’ve Come Over” “Maybe I’m too young to keep good love from going wrong,” Jeff Buckley sings with understated drama on the first verse of “Lover, You Should’ve Come Over,” before patiently building to a climactic falsetto showcase. Buckley wrote the smoldering, seven-minute ballad after the end of his relationship with musician Rebecca Moore, and he opens the epic version on his only proper studio album, 1994’s Grace, with a gorgeous harmonium instrumental that sounds like an otherworldly funeral organ. It became the most widely covered song Buckley wrote in his brief career, but nobody can possibly sing it like him. – A.S. 18. Elliott Smith – “Say Yes” Smith clears his throat and begins the acoustic-strummed ballad to a girl who made his world a vicarious idyll, the one “who’s still around the morning after.” An electric guitar glitters the track with sprightly, jazzy chords, letting out a melodic melancholy solo and syncing with Smith’s sotto voce singing as he sulks over their month-ago breakup. Now he longs for her to come back, optimistically musing that maybe he’d be “an exception to the rule.” Smith once told SPIN he penned the offhandedly beautiful song in five minutes while watching a muted episode of Xena: Warrior Princess. Whether a moving palliative for others mourning a love lost too soon or a heartrending tale of post-breakup realism, it utterly impales you. – L.B. 17. Roxy Music – “Avalon” Across eight albums in 10 years, Roxy Music evolved from an avant-garde glam-rock band to a sophisticated pop group. Avalon, the group’s swan song, was their most commercially successful record and indelibly romantic. Along with “More Than This,” the album’s title song — with its tropical and reggae-like rhythms — has become one of Roxy’s most popular songs. Its lyrics evoke the magic of love at first sight: “When you bossa nova, there’s no holding / But you have me dancing, out of nowhere.” Ferry’s debonair crooning is seductive and sincere, complemented by backing vocalist Yanick Étienne. The “Avalon” video is equally elegant, with a white tuxedo-clad Ferry dancing with his paramour. Almost 40 years later, this song — like the whole Avalon album — remains one of the definitive Valentine’s Day soundtracks. – David Chiu Credit: EG / Polydor 16. Tegan and Sara – “Nineteen” Some of the best rock tunes swim simultaneously in streams of “love song” and “breakup song,” welling up your eyes until everything blurs. “Nineteen,” a devastating anthem from Tegan and Sara’s fifth LP, The Con, is one such moment — entangling sex, heartbreak, romance and butterflies-in-your-gut angst into a compact, three-minute blast. It opens with a jarring admission: “I felt you in my legs before I even met you / And when I laid beside you for the first time, I told you / I feel you in my heart.” We don’t get all the details, but the relationship quickly sours, resulting in a bummed-out plane trip home — but also glimmers of hope. “I was 19,” the duo sing over the distorted downstroke riffs. “Call me.” – R.R. 15. Paramore – “Still Into You” A power-pop ode to everlasting love, “Still Into You” should surge in popularity around 2063 by soundtracking all those scene kids’ 50th wedding anniversary parties. In terms of Paramore lore (Para-lore?), “Still Into You” introduced the band’s departure from pure pop-punk — more charm, less angst. Written about Hayley Williams’ then-solid relationship with New Found Glory guitarist Chad Gilbert, it offers some great lines about making love work: “It’s not a walk in the park to love each other / But when our fingers interlock, can’t deny, can’t deny, you’re worth it.” And it’s such a sweet sentiment, reminding your S.O. that after all their bullshit and the stupid Netflix shows they make you watch, you’re still into them. Unfortunately for Williams, “still” didn’t mean forever — she and Gilbert split in 2017. – B.O. Credit: Fueled By Ramen 14. Stone Temple Pilots – “Interstate Love Song” Only Stone Temple Pilots could write a “love song” that explores lying about heroin use. In his 2011 memoir, Not Dead & Not For Sale, Scott Weiland said he wrote “Interstate Love Song” partly from the perspective of his girlfriend: “She’d ask how I was doing, and I’d lie, say I was doing fine. Chances are I had just fixed before calling her. I imagined what was going through her mind…” But there’s poetry in these dark images, as Weiland taps into relationship matters of trust and deception. The music only amplifies the song’s windows-down grandeur, from Weiland’s booming vocals to Dean DeLeo’s signature, twangy guitar riff. It remains STP’s finest hour. – D.K. and R.R. Credit: Atlantic 13. Patti Smith Group – “Because the Night” A highlight from her 1978 LP, Easter, “Because the Night” has become the punk poet laureate’s most well-known track — and also one of the most recognizable love songs of all time. After modest piano notes form a calm before the storm, Patti Smith bursts into her signature mode of elated, operatic singing — roleplaying the besotted lover in this impassioned hit co-written by Bruce Springsteen. Although the vocal delivery propels the song beyond itself, the lyrics detail the wanton desire just before the flight of the erotic at sundown “…because the night belongs to lovers.” Unlike most other subtler love songs, this is an unabashed entreaty. No more foreplay. On second thought, it’d be more apt to call it a “lust song.” – L.B. Credit: Arista 12. Coldplay – “Yellow” Who would have thought that a poor Neil Young imitation would spark Coldplay’s breakthrough hit? That’s what happened with their signature tune, “Yellow,” which focuses on an emotional devotion to…someone or something. Singer Chris Martin found the initial chords and lyrics during a live soundcheck, and he immediately started channeling the Godfather of Grunge with the lyric “look at the stars.” Then came the title word, which gives the song a slight element of mystery: “The word ‘yellow’ came out, and I was like, ‘No one’s gonna know what that means,’” he told Howard Stern in 2011. “It was a feeling more than a meaning.” But that feeling led to an entire career. – D.K. and R.R. Credit: Parlophone 11. Say Anything – “Alive With the Glory of Love” You can’t leave out “Alive” from any conversation about essential emo love songs. What opening lines are more gripping than “When I watch you, want to do you, right where you’re standing, yeah”? Then the chorus is irresistibly endearing and seemingly sincere: “No, I won’t let them take you / Won’t let them take you / Hell no, no!” Even if you start out listening as a joke, you gradually fall into its surprisingly romantic arms. But the song reveals a deeper meaning as it plays: The line “Should they catch us and dispatch us those separate work camps, yeah,” reminds us that “Love” is based on the story of Max Bemis’ grandparents, who are Holocaust survivors. So yeah…there’s a lot to unpack. – Danielle Chelosky Credit: J Records / Red Ink 10. Radiohead – “All I Need” “I’m an animal trapped in your hot car,” Thom Yorke croons during this divine meditation on romantic fixation. Aw, how sweet! Radiohead never write conventional love songs — but when they do explore the subject, few do so with such intensity. “All I Need” spends most of its run time at a low simmer, Yorke spitting out similar images (“I am a moth who just wants to share your light”) over Phil Selway’s trip-hop-y drum groove and a booming synth-bass. But the song’s climax, lyrically and musically, crashes in at full volume: “It’s all wrong!” Yorke yelps. “It’s all right!” – R.R. 9. Talking Heads – “This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody)” David Byrne famously wrote a lot of songs about “buildings and food,” so his first real “love song” doesn’t, um, sound a lot like the others. “I try to write about small things: paper, animals, a house,” he noted in the Stop Making Sense bonus interview. “Love is kinda big. I have written a love song, though. In this film, I sing it to a lamp.” That song is “This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody),” on which Byrne embraces romantic matters with surreal wordplay and, seemingly, confusion. “I guess I must be having fun,” he sings over the clanging percussion and woozy synths. But few songwriters tackle love with such zen, understanding that relationships are living organisms. “The less we say about it the better,” he yelps. “Make it up as we go along.” – R.R. Credit: Sire 8. The Cure – “Friday I’m in Love” Robert Smith doesn’t exactly do warm and fuzzy in his lyrics, and that’s exactly why “Friday I’m in Love” is one of the Cure’s signature hits. The song’s peppy, melodic jangle perfectly matches Smith’s innocent words about falling in love — he told this very publication that it’s a “dumb pop song” and “very optimistic and really out there in happy land.” Discounting Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, the song also captures the wide-eyed joy of that Friday feeling, with the possibilities of the weekend ahead. “Friday I’m in Love” ended up being the Cure’s last Top 40 hit — what a way to go off the charts swinging. – D.K. Credit: Fiction 7. Joy Division – “Love Will Tear Us Apart” The intro is a tease, seemingly previewing a forgettable song. Then it debouches into one of the most iconic, nostalgic riffs ever architected, launching an ‘80s anthem from year zero of that halcyon decade. Weirdly, it’s the most identifiable (yet least representative) of an eerie discography mostly inaccessible to casual listeners — and not only instrumentally. The post-punk dignitaries conjured a dark sound around themes of mental illness and hopelessness. And they didn’t totally sacrifice that dark aura in “Love Will Tear Us Apart” — it just underwent aesthetic osmosis. They saw the thorns of the rose, where the rest saw only the bud. – L.B. Credit: Factory 6. Tears for Fears – “Head Over Heels” Before their breakthrough LP, Songs From the Big Chair, Roland Orzabal and Curt Smith weren’t known for love — let alone happy — songs. Their debut, 1983’s The Hurting, was an emotionally turbulent record inspired by the work of American psychologist Arthur Janov. The mood lightened up somewhat on Songs From the Big Chair, especially with the majestic “Head Over Heels,” distinguished for its relatively upbeat lyrics and ecstatic Beatles-like “la-la-la-la-la” chorus towards the end. Adding to the romantic atmosphere is a humorous music video that depicts Orzabal trying to catch the eye of a bookish librarian. “Head Over Heels” is probably the closest we’ll ever get to a love song,” Orzabal remarked for the 2014 Big Chair reissue. “It’s a love song that kind of goes a bit perverse at the end.” – David Chiu Credit: Mercury 5. Oasis – “Wonderwall” The Gallagher brothers tug at our heartstrings with their signature hit “Wonderwall” — even as we question what they’re actually singing about. Most fans can belt all the words, starting with the opening lines: “Today is gonna be the day that they’re gonna throw it back to you / By now you should’ve somehow realized what you gotta do / I don’t believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now.” But we don’t hear that mysterious titular word until the fourth stanza. So what exactly is a wonderwall? In 1996, Noel Gallagher reportedly told NME he wrote the song for his then-girlfriend, Meg Matthews. Six years later he switched gears, telling the BBC, “The meaning of that song was taken away from me by the media who jumped on it, and how do you tell your Mrs. it’s not about her once she’s read it is?” Sooooo… “It’s a song about an imaginary friend who’s gonna come and save you from yourself,” he explained. Your wonderwall can be whatever you want it to mean, for whomever you love. Just hope the recipient understands your word choice. – Jason Stahl Credit: Creation 4. Foo Fighters – “Everlong” That initial rush of romantic ecstasy never lasts as long as we want it to. The strongest relationships persist in spite of this. On 1997’s “Everlong,” Foo Fighters frontman Dave Grohl can’t live in the magic moment. The future hasn’t even happened yet, and already, it’s haunting him: “And I wonder / When I sing along with you / If everything could ever feel this real forever / If anything could ever be this real again?” By the time of The Colour and the Shape, he was rocking with a band instead of accompanying himself in studio pastiche — and “Everlong” reflects that energy, a ballad-qua-anthem where the sting of recent divorce is flipped into innocent, emotional longing. – R.C. Credit: Roswell / Capitol 3. The Flaming Lips – “Do You Realize??” “Whenever I analyze the scientific realities of what it means to be living here on Earth — in this galaxy … spinning around the sun … flying through space — a terror shock seizes me!!!” Wayne Coyne once wrote of the Flaming Lips’ symphonic-sized staple. “I’m reminded once again of how precarious our whole existence is…” Existential dread is an…unusual…starting point for a “love song.” And you might argue that “Do You Realize??”, the centerpiece from 2002’s Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots, falls outside even the vast umbrella of our list. The harsh realization here, after all, is that “everyone you know some day will die.” But there’s hope in that epiphany! As Coyne tells us, every glimpse of death is a reminder to live: “Instead of saying all of your goodbyes,” he sings over Steven Drozd’s cartoonishly massive arrangement, “Let them know you realize that life goes fast / It’s hard to make the good things last.” Really, “Do You Realize??” is a love song to the entire universe. – R.R. Credit: Warner 2. The Smiths – “There Is a Light That Never Goes Out” The Smiths’ “angry young man” anthem perfectly captures the confusion and drama of teenage lust: Johnny Marr’s timeless, jangling guitar has given rise to countless solemn YouTube covers. Morrissey’s hyper-literate lyrics were influenced by Karel Reisz’s 1960 film, Saturday Night and Sunday Morning, written by Alan Sillitoe, whose short story “The Loneliness of the Long-Distance Runner” inspired everyone from Iron Maiden to Belle & Sebastian. “There Is a Light That Never Goes Out” makes an excellent choice for any road trip playlist — just watch out for those double-decker buses. – J.P.B. Credit: Rough Trade / Virgin 1. Yeah Yeah Yeahs – “Maps” “Wait, they don’t love you like I love you” is such a perfect line, especially from one fawned-over musician to another — in this case, Karen O to Liars frontman and then-boyfriend Angus Andrew. Bittersweet desperation runs throughout the beloved track, as Karen O tries to play it cool, keeping her voice to a measured warble, even though she’s essentially begging her partner to return her affection. “My kind’s your kind,” she sings, another heartrending dagger-like “Dude, I see you! See me, too!” Almost 20 years later, this song resonates even more thanks to numerous covers and interpolations, most notably Beyonce using the hook for her Lemonade cut “Hold Up” in 2016. If Beyonce samples you, you’re doing something right. – B.O. Credit: Polydor Listen to all of the songs below: #Oasis #TheFlamingLips #TheBreeders #TheCardigans #Weezer

Arplis - News source https://arplis.com/blogs/news/the-50-best-alt-rock-love-song

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the-e4b · 7 years

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THE FOLLOWING RESPONSE POST IS VERY OLD: IT HAS BEEN IN THE DRAFTS FOR A LONG WHILE. IT IS POSTED TODAY BECAUSE DISNEYMASTER IS STILL SEEKING ATTENTION SO HE WILL GET ATTENTION.

Continuing on from this post because DM has managed to totally miss the point of our replies and make up something entirely different.

1. We are not pretending our fandom isn’t filled with Men Rights Activist, Alt-righters and corporate yes men. Because, guess what? That’s not the focus of our blog. The focus of our blog is bronies (like yourself) who make an ass out of themselves or try to look smart but in the end look like nothing less than the end of a donkey’s ass. None of us CARE about politics in the slightest, we only care about a show about pastel talking horses to escape our shitty lives.

2. We will immediately give dear Peet every ounce of respect once he starts to own up to it. What he does now is make fun of transgenders, feminists, bronies, weeboos, professional writers and everything that goes against atleast one of his policies. No one respects him but his faithful herd of cockroaches.

3. There’s a difference between pointing out flaws in a character and obsessing and hating over every trait they have and show in an episode. But, I shouldn’t try to explain that to someone who obsesses over a character getting wings and character growth…

4. Bit too late on that “blackmailing us over to Peet”. Every one of us is already blocked by Jerry and already knows our dirty laundry and absolutely doesn’t care about it. And he will certainly not care about what a pathetic little shit like you has to say.

5. This point I’m not even gonna argue with. If you really want to go as far as to call a CHILDREN’S show sexist then you’re way past the point of no return. You’re taking a show for little kids WAY too serious, even by our standards. And BTW, Rotten Tomatoes’ opinion doesn’t mean shit if the movie made it’s money back with even more to add to this day. As we speak MLP:the movie has broken 50 million dollars in the box office with still a lot of theaters to hit and the DVD and Blu-ray still to come out. One small thing doesn’t seem like a lot, but soon one small thing leads to more and soon one small thing can be the biggest thing of all.

YOU, Disneymaster, are one of those vocal minorities who think that the show is full of “right wing/centralist corporate bs”. How about you just sit back and enjoy a good series like Ducktales or watch reruns of the good ol days of MLP. That’s still 52 episode where you can just shut your yap and enjoy blandness and the glory days of Queen and Empress Faust.

- Space Mare

PS. Still can’t believe you haven’t found out who I am yet.

I find it hard to believe that this poor soul is still trying to start more issues with us because we still exist and continue to oppose the most toxic people in the community. It doesn’t matter which way they lean politically, scum is scum. Al Franken and Roy Moore sit on each side of the political spectrum, both of them are dirty abusers, deserving to rot in a prison cell for the harm they caused others

I do not know why DM insists on white knighting on behalf of someone who actually despises that part of the fanbase that threw a giant tantrum many moons ago over Twilight Sparkle’s wings. It’s like how Ephrom continues to track down Peet’s enemies, despite senpai not giving a rat’s ass about him.

Also, It’s funny how DisneyMaster feels like he can act like an asshole again despite apologizing for his actions towards the fanbase. After that, we closed the book on the Anticorns as most of them were willing to acknowledge their faults and move on. DisneyMaster tried the moral high ground approach with us and even tried to use blackmail to try and get us to remove his Encyclopedia Dramatica page (which we had no hand in despite what his paranoia would tell him) and our previous screencaps.

He also tried to shine the spotlight on the things that we have done, as Space Mare said… Peet doesn’t care and no one else cares about what you have to say. Everyone had a phase where they were reckless and pious in their beliefs. You wanted to be a hero, you fought for something you believed was noble but you were shortsighted by the part of the fanbase that wanted to wait and see where the show was going before jumping to conclusions. At some points, we wanted to make a difference, we all wanted to interact with others, beg for free art and contribute to many collaborative stories… however because of the ambiguity of text, everyone’s true feelings are masked. I don’t remember everyone I annoyed but I moved on and worked to improve. The Book of Five Rings says that the path of self improvement is a neverending cycle.

I say this because humans are social creatures and making a good first impression is the first step to building a strong bond. The point is to grow from the mistakes and move on. We’ve moved on from you, DM… why can’t you do the same?

-JoJo

To finally relieve some inner anger I’ve been feeling because Disneymaster is an obnoxious parasite that doesn’t know when to fade into a pit of nothing or won’t fucking back off and leave us alone..I’m gonna speak myself with this Linkara:

You are the most annoying, self entitled, obnoxious and downright most self important scumfuck that I have EVER fucking come across when it comes to any fandom.

AND THAT IS SAYING A LOT.

You constantly seek to complain about certain things the MLP fandom as if that’s ALL the fandom consists off. As Saturn states, E4B is not on THAT type of garbage because we aren’t INTERESTED in it, we discuss and criticize the people who make the fandom look poor or make complete ass out of themselves and come off a arrogant and think they know more in regards to a show about multicolored horses.YOU’RE the one constantly seeking the negative traits and screech the almighty heavens how “TEH BRONIEZ FANDOM IZ BAD CAUSE THIS AND THAT”.

And then we come to my favorite one:

SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. OVER. THE MISGENDERING. SHIT.

We’ve stated this and stated THIS AGAIN:

The reasons we REFUSE to call Jerry “Lily” ISN’T because we have something against transgenders, hell we have transgender friends. One of the bands I’m a fan of has a transgender leader (And just so you can get it through your fucking obnoxious skull, the person in question is Laura Jane Grace of Against Me, who came out as a transgender in 2012 and even wrote an album about her struggles with gender dysphoria). The reasons we don’t call Jerry by their preferred name is because not only does Jerry show no respect to not only ex friends who dared disagree with him on certain things, no respect to his family, no respect to his own colleagues of the fandom, no respect to other fandoms,or even his fans…

He has no respect TRANSGENDERS, he even infamously snarked and attacked a transgendered individual who called out his garbage.

How do we (myself especially) respect someone who does THAT?!

Or what, does that not fit your stupid political leanings or for your SJW tendancies?

“OH YOU SHOULDN’T BE COMPLAINING OVER RINGTEAM CRITICZING CHARACTER TRAAAAITS”.

Have you looked in the mirror Mr. I-Hate-MLP-Because-Twilight-Got-Wings-And-Said-Meghan-McCarthy-Should-Be-Beaten?

“DURRRRR BE GLAD I HAVEN’T TATTLETAILED ON YOU GUYS TO JERRY WAAAH”

Jerry knows about the blog’s existence and has both shown little to no interest and even when he did, he gave the usual bitch rant he always gives towards people who call out his shit:

Obligatory insults that involve “transphobic” and “Nazi”.

Also, “MLP Sexist”. Oh sure, Gen 4 is totally sexist. A generation created by a feminist with the idea of making the show towards a general audience is “sexist”.

Do you ever fucking hear yourself, or do you love the sound of your voice that you jerk to it?

But then again, this is the same asshole who took his niece’s plushie away and has no regret over it and has even show depression over a fucking children’s show involving multicolored horses, all while screeching pity about how “nobody likes him” despite the fact he himself is his own downfall by constantly bitching at fans of the show and even comparing them to Donald Trump supporters.

Clearly we’re the bad guys compared to the guy whining about colored horse butts for about four years.

As Saturn stated, while critical reception for the movie was just mixed, it was a financial success, getting a total of $51 million at the box office and even then, it did good for it’s opening week with $21.9 million in the US and Canada. That’s ESPECIALLY impressive considering BLADE RUNNER 2049 (and by an extent, the romnatic survival film The Mountain Between Us) came out ON THE SAME DAY. Not to mention the 2017 adaptation of IT was still in theaters.

At the end of the day DM, You’re nothing but an obnoxious, annoying, and downright tumorous parasite that doesn’t know when to fuck off and leave us alone, let alone the fandom.

You really wanna know why people give you shit?

BECAUSE YOU FUCKING MAKE THEM DO IT.

YOU FUCKING SPEW POLITICAL GARBAGE OVER A CHILDREN’S SHOW, ATTACK FANS OVER SIMPLY ENJOYING THE SHOW THEY’VE GROWN TO LOVE, AND DOWNRIGHT CONSTANTLY THINK YOU’RE IN THE FUCKING RIGHT EVERY TIME.

Heck, one of your fucking DA Tags was “Disneymaster is always right”. You cry fucking pity every time because you hate how people snark at you, but then you do stupid shit like accuse a show created by FEMINIST, let alone a toy line targeted to a certain demographic of “being sexist”.

I would say take responsibility for your shitty actions, but the one time you did, you backed out f it because “WAAAAAAAH E4B ARE SAYING SHIT I DON’T LIIIKE”. Like you STILL keep doing because you can’t let shit fucking go.

Do everyone a fucking favor: Do something with your sad fucking life.

But chances are, you’ll disregard everything we’ve said because nobody else is right but you.

You fucking are sad and borderline unstable.

- deafpony.

I love how right there you admit you don’t care about what the SU fandom did, because they agree with your opinions.

Those extremest you think are all over the MLP community? They are often called out and are despised but the fandom at large. Like you.

Unlike SU, which has no problems harassing artists and staff members over petty shit because you sad losers think you’re heroes living in a crappy Young Adult novel.

“ROTTEN TOMATOS SAID MOVIE BAD ME RIGHT!!!!!!”

Who the fuck cares about what the same site that bashed A Cure for Wellness, one of the most unique horror movies of 2017? The movie still made a mint anyway. Bet you’re one of those types who freaked out because Ghostbusters 2016 flopped.

Because you’re the worst type of fan, Dumpy. You don’t care about the story, or characters, or animation, you care about how “progressive” it is. I bet that’s why you like that blander than white bread Season 1 of MLP, because Faust’s name was on it. Nothing more.

Go do something productive with your sad life. Or screech about a blog that hasn’t said a word about you again. That’s a victory for Social Justice!

#disneymaster #idiot #space mare post #jojo mod post #deafpony mod post #mod kirby

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ethicallysourcedhumanmeat · 8 years

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Practically Impractical

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Part 2

“Don’t get me wrong,” Seven starts cautiously once they’ve packed her gear in the car, “that was like, really cool. But what was it, I mean what happened there.”

“Nothing,” she says coolly and buckles her seatbelt. “It wasn’t anything.”

Seven tries to drop it, he really does, but he can’t help it. “I mean, no it was nothing, but I mean, you definitely rap battled that guy.”

He catches her look reflected in the window and for a minute he wishes he was anyone else, someone who could keep their mouth shut, maybe Jumin, but then her mouth twitches and he can see her suppress a smile.

“It wasn’t a rap battle, I didn’t rap and I didn’t challenge him.”

“No you definitely challenged him, my girlfriend, palms sweaty, Yoosung’s spaghetti—”

“Luciel, I’m concerned that you don’t know what rap is,” she laughs.

He smiles, she’s relaxed laughing, job done. It bothers him though, whoever that man had been he had known her and done something to her. Something she didn’t want to talk about, and he was the king of not talking about things.

“Okay, okay. So you didn’t rap battle, but you sang at that guy. I mean don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind filling my baby with your gear and playing roadie, and I really dig being your sound guy but if you’re gonna start assaulting strangers with acoustic alt rock can you give me some warning, do you know how many hits I could have gotten on a video like that?”

She smirks but it’s fake and Seven is quiet. Alright Saeyoung, he thinks, let it go for now. He watches her in his peripheral. She takes her phone out and he sees the colours of the RFA app reflect off her glasses, she switches between a chat and FB for a while and he thinks maybe he sees a picture of the guy from the sidewalk. By the time Seven pulls into his garage she’s stuffed the phone back in her pocket and is staring out the window.

He can see her mouthing the words to the song that plays on the radio and a lump forms in his throat. Normally she’d be pumped from rehearsal. The last time they’d drove home she’d pulled out her Ukelele and played the strangest rendition of Enter Sandman he’d ever heard. But here she was withdrawn, not even singing out loud to the ridiculous sad song playlist she’d started.

They sit in the car for a few minutes before the radio turns itself off. She doesn’t make a move when Seven gets out of the car. He stops for a minute, it wouldn’t be the first time she came out to the garage to clear her thoughts. He moves on, he’ll give her some time, make them a snack and find something really terrible to watch before she has to pick Max up from school; but he doesn’t make is more than 3 feet before he hears her.

“Hey,” she says softly. Her big orange eyes are watery on the other side of the window.

“Hey,” he smiles, 3 big steps and he’s kneeling on the other side of the door forehead pressed against the glass. “I didn’t mean to pry you know? You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to.”

“I know,” she says, still quiet.

“I don’t even care who that guy was, you know. He looked like a douchebag. I hate his face and his shoes were really stupid.”

“You know how I have a kid,” she starts.

“WHAT?!” He gasps. “She’s a Kid? I thought she was just like Santa’s least helpful helper. Kid? Wow, I guess that makes sense.”

“Saeyoung,” she taps the glass. “That was her Dad.”

He’s quiet for a moment, it felt like the air had been sucked out of his lungs. “I thought he was overseas.”

“Me too.”

“He didn’t tell you he was here?”

“It might be R&R, I don’t know, he doesn’t tell me anything. He just pays support and I pretend he doesn’t exist until he likes a couple pictures on facebook or owes me money.”

He’d known the situation with her Ex was complicated. He suspected there was more to it than she wanted to talk about, the kid didn’t ask for or about her Dad and in the month Callie and her girl had lived with him they’d barely mentioned him. Until today he’d been such a non issue that Seven hadn’t even been concerned enough to look him up.

Which was exactly what Seven was going to do now. He pressed his lips against the window in an exaggerated kiss that made her laugh and stood up. He heard the door open and Callie still laughing.

“Hey,” she called.

He waved her off.

“Luciel, what are you doing we have to unload.”

“Important defender of justice business!”

“No, Seven, you’re not hacking my ex-husband.”

And there it was.

“Saeyoung,” her hands wrapped around his middle and he felt her cheek against his back.

“Oh no!” he gasps. “An unknown assailant! How will I escape.”

“Saeyoung,” she says, firmer this time but he can feel her cheek tense with a smile. “You can’t hack my ex-husband ok?”

“No one will know,” he reasons.

“Seven he’s in the military.”

“I’m a pretty ok at hacking.”

“No, it’s not. It’s not that I think you’ll get caught or, that I don’t want you to hack him.”

“WAIT!” Seven spins in place and bends over until they’re nose to nose. “Did my Queen just ask me to hack someone? Did an Angel just says that I Seven Zero Seven, Defender of Justice, am the single best hacker, capable of infiltrating Militaries?”

“That’s not, Seven, this isn’t a silly challenge, this is my life, our life.”

Shit.

“Saeyoung, don’t look up his schedule, or what he’s doing. I don’t want to know. I mean, I do but—”

“Wouldn’t it be easier? No one will know if I just find out how long he’s here.”

“You don’t understand. I’d know. And on the off chance he does ask to see her I’d have to worry about if I let on that I know his schedule... Saeyoung, if I ask too many questions about where he is he thinks I’m obsessed with him. He thought when I didn’t date I was obsessed him. When he’s lonely and bored he wants me to hang out. It’s hard enough not to think about him every day when I don’t know if he has time he could be spending with his kid.”

“Oh.”

“Fuck, no. Not like that.”

“No, it’s ok. I mean you were married. It’s, you know. It’s fine.”

“God no, Saeyoung, not like that. Shit. No. I mean I fucking hate him ok? And I have this awesome fucking kid and I hate that he doesn’t want to hang out with her. He hangs up on her if her mind wonders on the phone, or she’s out of view on skype for more than a few seconds. And when she’s telling me about things that excite her it’s hard not to think about how hurt she must be that he doesn’t want to share that.

And it’s hard not to think about him when you tell me I should replace my worn out patched up hoodie because for 10 years I couldn’t even buy myself clothing without worrying it would start a fight. So sure, I’d love for you to fuck his shit up. I’d love even more to ghost him. Just forget he exists but I can’t and as nice it would be to anticipate his bullshit I’d rather not have to think about him that much.”

Seven is quiet, his expressive eyes are considerate and he kisses her on the nose. They unload his car in comfortable silence and he does make her a snack. Strange to have fridge full of real food; he contemplates whether to go healthy or convenient and settles on Honey Buddha chips with cheese and grapes. She eats it sitting on the floor, her head resting against his knee while he plays video games. She listens to the audio he took during the rehearsal and makes notes, which songs worked, where she was flat, sharp, where her time was off. She fires off texts and picks up her daughter from school.

He decides to work at the kitchen table while the girls make dinner. Max is smiling at him whenever he looks up. He closes out his work without finishing and watches them.

“Hey,” he says. “Can I help you?”

“I don’t know,” Max says sceptically. “Can you cook?”

Callie laughs. Seven shrugs.

“Why don’t you teach me.”

“There isn’t really much left. Mom just has to turn the oven on.”

“Oh.”

“Why does everyone call you Seven.”

“Do they?”

“Mr. Han calls you Luciel but your name is Saeyoung, because that’s what Mom calls you.”

“Your name is Maxine, why does everyone call you Max.”

“Max is a name, Seven is a number,” she makes a face at him.

“I didn’t say it was a very good nickname,” he laughs.

“Were you coding before?” She asks.

“I was.”

“Really?” And before he knows it she’s run off and returned with a bunch of little toys and a small computer he recognizes as some form of raspberry pi. She chatters excitedly to him about the toys she’s coded. She shows him how she built the case herself and what she’s made that’s worked and what she’s having trouble with. Callie smiles at him from behind Max.

Supper is cooling on the stove when Callie finally makes them clear the table and he can’t stop smiling even if he is eating pretty much cold food. It’s real food and there’s these awesome girls who care enough to make it for him. And despite Saeren’s complaints about it being cold every time he looks up Callie is practically beaming at him. After supper he packs Max’s lunch and adds a riddle in binary while Callie coaxes the 8 year old into the bath tub. He laughs listening to them argue about brushing her hair, and how long she can read before lights out.

He’d worried, at first, about having a kid in his life. It’s been six months and it got easier every day. On days like today he wondered how he could be so lucky to not only find Callie, but a whole family that he fit so completely into.

“I get it,” he says when Callie falls into the couch next to him.

“Get what?”

“What you said earlier. Every minute I spend with Max I learn this new awesome thing about her, she’s smart and passionate and it must be frustrating to know how awesome she is and be faced with him.”

“You do a pretty good job of making up for it though.”

“Do I?”

“Oh god yes, coding is so far beyond me, she almost never tells me what she’s working on until she’s finished. I’m excited she can share that with you.”

They fall into the usual quiet of the evening, with Callie testing out a game for her show and him coding something or other. Saeren was coming out of his room more and more, and Max opened up a little more every day.

“Saeyoung,” Saeren asks sitting in the chair opposite them. They both glance up. As much progress as they’d made Saeren was still mostly quite when Seven was home.

“Yeah?” She could see the way he tried not to seem too eager, the way he didn’t quite look up from his laptop screen.

“Aren’t you afraid?”

Callie doesn’t realize she’s holding her breath until she lets it out. “Of what?”

Saeren doesn’t take his eyes off of his brother and he doesn’t clarify.

“Terrified,” he admits. “But a little less everyday.”

“Of what?” she asks again.

“Being like her,” they say in unison.

“Oh god,” she says under her breath. “I never thought, I didn’t know.”

Seven shrugs and smiles. Saeren watches him.

“You know,” Callie says finally, “she doesn’t define you. Either of you. Not who you are, and not your ability to be Max’s family. Max’s Dad has good parents, kind people who care and try despite what a complete bag of soggy horse dicks he turned out to be, and he is a terrible father. If anything I think you guys might be better with her than I am. Maybe you check yourselves more than I ever think to but I’ve never worried about leaving her alone with either of you. Leaving the two of you alone together maybe but not her with you.”

“That’s stupid,” Saeren snorts.

“Which part?” She asks. Genuinely curious.

“You don’t worry when you leave her with us? You should at least worry a little bit.”

“I worry when I leave her with Zen, because he might fill her full of candy or take her on his motorcycle. I worry when I leave her with Yoosung that she might convince him she can use the stove or accidentally delete his LOLOL inventory or make him cry. I worry that maybe she’ll irritate you when you need quiet or she might trip over a powercord and end up messing up a day of work for one of you. But I don’t worry about her safety. Should I?”

Saeren shrugs, and Saeyoung squeezes her arm.

“You guys are our family now. We trust you. So get used to it.”

#practically impractical #Mystic Messenger #Callie Miller #custom MC

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bladekindeyewear · 5 years

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Freed up some time, actually! Gonna blog the new pages of HS^2. Liveblogging resume...

FYI, the post I glimpsed that alerted me to the fact that new pages exist had a translucent screenshot of Brain Ghost Dirk on it, so I know that at least is in store for me. Makes sense; a way to involve Dirk’s voice obnoxiously heavily even when he’s too far away to narrate. And ties into this... chapter(?) name, of course. Chapters, huh?

> CHAPTER 1. Ghostflusters

God. Damnit.

Could we NOT??? No?

Fuck you, Dirk. I blame you for this.

So we have greenery, a can-city and Sburb-legal human house mix... some sorta cow-looking thing from far away in the front yard...

The void resounds. Space seizes and warps as the bounds of relevance erode away to nothing but the wishful nostalgia of times passed. There is a hole in the middle of the universe, and it is hungry.

All very literally true.

But the denizens of this particular iteration of Earth C don’t know it. All of this is just business as fucking usual for a planet plagued by war, continuous inclement ghost weather, and the general malaise of being absolutely severed from canon.

--oh, FUCK. This isn’t the new planet, this is Candy timeline Earth. I didn’t wanna come back here! :C

I guess that explains most of the content warnings. Except fucking ALCOHOLISM. Gee, thanks for adding THAT to the Candy timeline, as if it wasn’t fucked over enough!!! Bluh.

I thought the closing lines of the Epilogue were that after RoboDave, Aradia and alt!Callie dove out of the Candyverse inside the singularity, the black-hole timelines and Dirk’s presumably-still-”relevant” nonsense weren’t going to collide with each other again? So... why are we seeing this? Is there going to be MORE influence like that, and the ending line was just fancy-talk? Is it just an irrelevant little follow-up to Candy to show things turning out okay or pseudo-okay, like an epilogue to the epilogue? Or is some of this Dirk nonsense presumably within the bounds of some sort of canon going to still have some last bit of influence on this so-called non-canon timeline?

That last one would make sense, given that it echoes how Homestuck^2′s dubious canonicity would still have definite influence on fanworks outside of canon. Right?

Let me pull that last line from the epilogues again--

...where’s the Epilogues’ log, this is getting kind of hard to find with all their reorganization... fuck, I had to guess at the URL even. Here we go, the last page of Meat...

The hole leaves behind an absence in the sky so calm that continuing to call it a sky wouldn’t seem to do it justice. It’s a perfectly neutral expanse into which anything one can imagine might be summoned. And for a while, anything was. But not anymore. Where the hole gaped just moments ago, there now exists an imaginary line.

Above this line resides all that matters. Below exists all else. Never again the twain shall meet.

...Right. This implies that Canon and Non-Canon shall never meet again. BOTH ways. Doesn’t quite gel with the fact that we’re cutting back here--

Oh.

This is about Jake and Brain Ghost Dirk isn’t it. I noticed his name down further on the page. THAT’S why we’re cutting back here.

So, Canon and Non-Canon aren’t exactly meeting... not for anything relevant, anyway. But we’re using Candy Jake’s visibility of Brain Ghost Dirk to get a better idea of Dirk’s broader self and plans through a splinter of him? While getting another glimpse into how the post-epilogue Candy timeline is going for our, er... “curiosity”? Is that it?

Hm. I guess that doesn’t count as the twain “meeting”... I’ll just keep reading now.

They spend their days absorbed in the petty and pointless pursuits of “having jobs” and “raising families” and “falling in love”.

Is this Dirk’s narrator voice? This sounds like something the current megalomaniacal Dirk would say.

I’m not going to quote the rest of the text’s further reminders of how Jane has been made into an absolutely fucked-over asshole in every timeline except the one where she grew old to open a Joke shop, adopt Dad, die, get prototyped and timeline-doubled, then mysteriously disappear from any mention in the Epilogues as if the Sprites were just forgotten about completely eventually.

> (==>)

Oooh, using the less-relevance-surrounding-parens that were used on retconned ghost!Vriska back in Homestuck proper to denote our presence in the non-canon Candy timeline? How handy!

Not a far-away cow, then.

John has been an incredible pal, opening up his home to Jake and his son on such short notice, and even offering him a pair of pants, as well as a shirt that he has so far neglected to put on.

Alright, that got a chuckle from me.

John’s house doesn’t have air conditioning.

What the flying fuck.

...Ah, John’s been away patching things up with Roxy some more, I presume.

It, like the rest of his assets, is in her name. She’d seen to that as soon as they were married.

Life players and assets, huh? Always gotta be hoggin’ em.

He hasn’t seen much of Tavros today either, but that’s not unusual. He’s probably out with his kismesis, the one he thinks Jake doesn’t know about.

Huh. Maybe Candy’s young Vriska? Couldn’t get the real Tavros with your main self, so your alternate nigh-clone self settled with a human by the same name? Or one of the other kids we heard of from this ‘verse..?

> (==>)

Jake’s hot man-bod cropped out of this image to avoid titillating my readers too much.

(Tumblr keeps jumping back to the top of my post after I add images and I keep thinking the title reads “Ghostfuckers”.)

Jake washes the dirt out from under his fingernails, and his eyes fall on the bottle still sitting on the counter. John had opened it, but together they’d barely touched the stuff. Jake had promised him and Tavvy he’d dry up his act and all, but... well.

God damnit. If this is still Dirk-voiced narration -- I’m not sure it can be, now I think about it, as he’s supposed to be “out of range” or something, unless non-canon is just malleable like that, which wouldnt be surprising (or Dirk’s splinter’s presence allows it) -- he could literally be inducing or writing in Jake’s drinking problem just to hurt him more. You can’t really put an overstep that assholish past Prince Dirk the way he’s gotten to be.

There was another ask in my inbox insisting that Dirk wasn’t going to stay the true villain here, if only as some sort of karmic revenge for declaring his self-importance... but I still don’t think that’s the case. For one, Dirk HASN’T declared himself the villain... he still can’t see how fucked-up and unjustified his trampling over of everyone’s wills IS. Shadows of recognition... but not really. He really honestly believes he has the fucking RIGHT to do what he’s doing.

(Which is, incidentally -- to answer another ask -- why there’s basically NO chance that Rose has some sort of control or recognition of her situation under the surface, and is playing Dirk, as another person hopefully surmised. No. She really IS being unknowingly steered away from personal growth and recognition of the thought-control she’s under... because nothing less could feel as horrible to us.)

Part of the entire POINT of Homestuck and its Riddle was to show that these crazy kids, if they put their wills to it, always had the potential to be the literal Gods of the world around them. That when ordinary people grasp the will and drive to shape the world around them, they can turn everything back from the brink of destruction... or vice versa. Thus, it’s only appropriate that a player from this game could become a villain more disgusting than any we’d imagined in the series so far. What he’s been doing -- writing twisted sorrow directly into the lives and experiences of those around him, nurturing their worst, most power-hungry tendencies (Rose) and deceiving them more directly than Doc Scratch (who was PART Dirk) ever did, making a JOKE of their free will in a more terribly direct way than ANY have been shown onscreen to do?? It IS, and is MEANT to be, the worst we have EVER seen in Homestuck. Not as clumsy and from-the-outside as Lord English, but just as blatantly direct. Not as easy to ignore or mistake as Doc Scratch’s horrible, intentional Prince-of-Hearty worsening of the players, instead just as impossible to gloss-over as it is to bear witness to. That very TITLE, “Prince of Heart”, can embody the very ANTITHESIS of the Ultimate Riddle itself, robbing EVERYONE of their ability to shape not just the world around them, but even so much as themselves or their very thoughts. When used the way Dirk is using it RIGHT NOW, anyway. And his ambition is to impose this on all of Paradox Space.

There COULD be another villain, later. But I can’t imagine a single one more appropriate. And Andrew’s just the type to use one of the Striders, both practically self-inserts of parts of his personality and presence, as that ultimate villain to be overcome in a story about escaping Canon, too.

Turning his ex into an alcoholic just for his own self-satisfaction? In a side timeline where Jake didn’t even try a relationship with him again and finally had a chance to grow up happy in SOME universe? I wouldn’t put it past him, and you shouldn’t either.

Moving on.

> (==>)

Eugh. I just... don’t want to think about him being an alcoholic on TOP of everything else. As if there wasn’t enough to deal with in Candy already.

> (==>)

Hm?

> (==>)

The jungle air is heavy, humid, and familiar. Twenty years on and the thick drag into his lungs settles on him in a blanket of nostalgia, reassuring in its discomfort.

Hm. Is this his fantasy, or a view of him in another timeline?

He is deeper in the jungle than he’d ever venture in his waking hours. There were places on his island that not even his Gran would tread, and she’d been the bravest person he’d ever known.

Hmm. So he even knows it’s a dream, but is still in control...

Jake doesn’t recognize anything. The jungle of his dreams is wild and unknown, and there are things moving in the dense undergrowth.

...Hhhuh. Still not sure what to think of this yet.

A sudden wind thrashes the canopy. There are pine needles in his mouth. There aren’t any pine needles in the jungle.

Very Dream, then.

> (==>)

--Yup.

> (==>)

Yoink--

> (==>)

JAKE: Yes you are i know that much. I saw your body! I carried your coffin chock full of all those stupid fucking swords! DIRK: Nope. JAKE: Dont nope me mister!

They would pile all those shitty swords into his coffin, yeah.

Anyway, now to see how much Prince Dirk is in this Dirk. And if he’s in one mind with himself or has the slightest chance of feeling rebellious.

JAKE: I know a dead dirk when i see one! DIRK: Sure you do. But that wasn’t me. Are you really surprised to find out I got a couple of spares? JAKE: So what youre saying is you arent my dirk. DIRK: ...That is a whole ‘nother conversation that we really don’t have time for, pertaining to exactly who or what ‘your dirk’ actually constitutes. DIRK: Do you mean the Dirk from your timeline? DIRK: Then yes, that Dirk is dead. DIRK: If you mean the Dirk that you fucked and then ghosted, no, I’m not your Dirk. DIRK: If you mean the Dirk that you felt closest to, that you really knew--

...well, this Dirk still knows how to be a presumptuous, pushy creep. :(

JAKE: Ahhh! Brain ghost dirk! DIRK: In the ghosty flesh. JAKE: Crumbs bro where have you been? JAKE: I could have used someone on my side! JAKE: You just disappeared one day without even the odd toodaloo to mark your passing! DIRK: That isn’t strictly true. I did disappear, but it was in a catastrophic blaze of hope-drenched pathos. I even threw out a couple one-liners. DIRK: But you wouldn’t remember that. JAKE: Because...it was a different dirk? DIRK: No, a different Jake.

Hhhuh. So in the claymation-reproduced Lord English stagefight -- or, maybe more likely, the pre-retcon Aranea-induced Game Over timeline -- he was too washed out by hopesplosions to manifest properly?

DIRK: Until recently there’s been a shortage of ambient narrative relevance for Dirks, since one particular motherfucker has been sucking it all up like a thirsty little twink at his first interspecies rave.

Hm! So Prince Dirk has been making it so other splinters of himself have really limited ability to influence, huh? Guess that’s a sort of price for the narrative-hijacking power he’s attained. Wonder how this Dirk really feels about that.

> (==>)

--Pff. He’s certainly not shy about letting Jake know he shouldn’t trust him, though! That’s a good sign.

I’ll split the post here for a bit. Seems we’re about halfway through this upd8 from the look of the log.

#Homestuck #hs2 #Homestuck Liveblog #upd8 #bladekindeyewear #blastyoboots

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