#i'll probably come up w other stuff but thats it for now

[your-ne1ghbor]

It was 1 am-2 am when I decided: OOOO I should mess with Star's design again... so tell me... Why did it work???

also another long post from the sleep deprived fish lets goo

The cape is ugly af, but the rest of the deign is actually...GOOD??? I am in shock since this rarely happens when I actually like how the colors came out on any character-

UNFORTUNATLY, the cape is what ruins it due to how BLAND it is. Not only that, but it is VERY important to how I design his cape. Like basically:

Yes, that is how important his cape is! I wanna talk about what his cape means in another post where I talk about the Star Realm, but for now, I got this ugly ahh cape.

Not only that, the rims with the colors being gold is actually wrong with how I wanted to make his color pallet. The gold rims (ON HIS CAPE NOT THE REST OF THE OUTFIT) are supposed to be a light blue to signifiy a lake. HOWEVER, I tried to see what it would look like, especially here and in my other post here, where it just does not work with his design. Sure, the light blue is nice, but doesn't fit no matter how hard I try to make it look nice. The gold rims work way too well to where the only light blue where it would work, would only be seen on the back of his cape...WHICH IS UGLYYYYYYYYY

Perhaps I go with either a different cape? Change up the color pallet? Or try to make it work with the lore of the Star Realm? (Yeah I'm being serious, thats how important his cape is and how I represent it. If it doesn't look good or work, then idk... I really wanted to incorprate the star realm onto his cape. I might have to come up with a symbol of the star realm if this doesn't work)

The front however, is actually okay, which is basically the little circle with the ribbon draping over his cape. It is just as important as the rest of the design of his cape, ESPECIALY with those 2 pieces in particular. I dont have a problem with it, since it is what I wanted it to look like in the first place and works well with the design either way.

I don't want to continue empathizing on how important it is to how I represent his cape, but it is overall significant to his design. So I'll talk about the bottom of his design since it is actually where I had trouble with before.

To be specific, it is how I wanted his top to look like. Either I wanted a closed off semi-skirt like what the original or what @signed-sapphire and @chillwildwave did with their star boy's design, or go with a more open skirt like what @oh-shtars and @spectator-zee with theirs. It ofc ended up being more open, just it being shorter. I was unironically inspired by Eugene's outfit lmao but the rest came by easy. I knew I wanted his shoes to be almost up to his knees cause he needs to be FANCYYYYY. I also changed up his sleeves and made it more flowy cause I wanted more fun with his design and works with his character :D

Speaking of character, this somewhat works with his character. SOMEWHAT. He is pretty a optimistic kind of prankster, but I feel like his bright personality is toned down to how dark the outfit came out. I know it is to represent the stars since...you know..he is one, just that (quote from one of my bsfs (TY FOR YOUR INSIGHT BTW)) "the outside is more dark whilst the inside has lighter colors, it makes it look like a glowing star trying to hide, a bit".

I mean, makes sense to why he needs to hide: Maggy wants to make sure he is fucking dead- JOKES ASIDE, it works with context, but he doesn't nessicairly like hiding stuff, like he is pretty open about his feelings for example, but like I said, it also works since he has to hide from the people of Rosas and her parents or else he's seen as the monster (rawr rawr rawr) in their eyes 💀

That aside, you probably notice I changed up his hair. Why? Because I wanted to try something and make it have more depth. It works, so it stays for now.

Is this the final design for him? No. Its not. Until I get the cape right, I still have to get his design working. At least it is working with how I am envisioning it, minus the few little details that make me annoyed for no particular reason other than it needing to work with his character and world.

My next post is going to be an update to the Maggy silly lil backstory cause...it is REALLY important to the story 😭😭

Until then, GOOD DAY/AFTERNOON/NIGHT

[intertexts]

ALSO OOPS I DONT THINK I EVER SENT YOU THE TRIVIA FOR 27?????? UH OH. OUT OF ORDER. this one is a lot shorter though so it's ok

EPISODE 27 TRIVIA:

- bizly opens this one in a baby voice "wewcome to just wolled wiff it!" absolutely insane

- charlie makes excuses for his cracked energy was because he was in the UK and tommy and ranboo were in the other room (TOMMYINNIT JUMPSCARE)

- Jesus is canon yet again. but only in vyncents world

- CONDI THOUGHT HAMSTER DANCE WAS A UNIVERSAL EXPERIENCE AT MIDDLE SCHOOL DANCES. and not just like. a youtube video that everyone knows. they played hamster dance at his middle school dance.

- speaking of which they've been overlorded again because the hamster WAS NOT ORIGINALLY A HAMSTER bizly did that solely because he has never heard hamster dance and wanted to be in on the joke

- charlie gets so worked up over the william short leg thing again and it's REALLY funny. bizly is like "I'll stop bringing it up when you stop having hilarious overreactions to it"

- "why the fuck did william make ice copies of dakotas parents that's so dark man"

"HE DIDNT MEAN IT TO BE !!!!! i think william is not very emotionally intelligent especially when it comes to stuff like this and he wanted to do something sweet for dakota. 'i know. Christmas is a great time for him to see his parents again because it's family and it'll make him happy!' without thinking about the moral implications OR the fact that they would come alive and try to strangle him"

grizzly: "dakota probably doesn't even remember Christmas with his parents"

charlie, REALLY far away from his mic: "WELL FUCK ME THEN"

- that was CONFIRMED mal trying to brwak through the barrier! charlie is TERRIFIED for williams sake especially bc he can't use his powers anymore

- condi: "hes pissed william isn't a planeswalker anymore and thats all he wanted you for"

charlie: "yknow! I dunno if william is a planeswalker anymore! he might not be!"

- WILLIAM WAS ACTUALLY BORN WITH A POWER!!!!! I forgot about this omg. so the one he was born with is called true sight and it means he's always been naturally able to see ghosts and monsters that normal people usually can't. YIPPEE

- he's also still got Kemuri's (smoke guy) powers obv ("that he regrets deeply every day"). they ARE in the spirit world and usually william wouldn't need a guide but since the wisps left him their guide is now master cole! if he were to leave/abandon them or whatever they'd no longer be able to stay in the spirit world. even william

- there are full versions of the colestyle gaming videos hidden somewhere on the patreon. fun fact. they're also talking about now doing one where william plays phasmophobia. or doing one with all 4 of them playing a game and bizly being tide. i don't think they ever actually did that but GOD i would kill for it.

- charlie was being annoying and grizzly responded with "I hope william stays alive *forever*" which sounds like it should be a nice thing to say but the way he said it was so absolutely scathing . brutal.

- quick mac detour theyre back to the game thing charlie says he wants to do a video playing elden ring as gillion and i NEED THAT SOOOO BAD. I miss gillion so much :(

- speaking of gillion idk why there's so much gillion trivia rn but charlie says the inspiration for his voice was "a combination of the spongebob narrator and my himbo fantasy" hello?

HOW HAS BIZLY NEVER HEARD HAMSTER DANCE??????????? yes this is what i'm taking from this. hello. how.

im so delighted w/ william thinking it's a great idea to make ice copies of his friends dead parents. god. NONE of the fucking prime defenders are emotionally intelligent they all have so many problems. prime traumatic stress defenders!!

ive said it like a billion times but i'm so fucking excited for the mal shit!!! i can't waittt!!!!! shaking him back n forth!!! wiwi torment nexus now!!!! also him being born with true sight is REALLY cool actually i feel like. this has been referenced on n off but i didn't realize it was actually a thing.. huh. i wonder if that's why the wisps targeted him. except their entire thing Is being seen so i dunno.!! cool... god. wiwi i love u wiwi... i want to go to deadwood i have so many fucking questions!!! why is the trickster there!! rift between worlds thats just coincidentally in his hometown!!! also i was just thinking ab kemuri's smoke powers im so glad he still feels awful using them :]] "i hope william stays alive forever" MEAN TO HIM!!! holy shit!!! wheezing!!

im gonna have a great time w gillion whenever i get around 2 riptide btw thats so funny. help. spogebob narrator himbo fantasy........

[writing-plurals]

for a bit of background, i have a lot of ocs who all exist together in the same universe, and im planning to turn them into animations as soon as i develop the skills for it. most of them, if not all, have some sort of childhood trauma, or at least have gone through crap as kids. this is because i love showing characters healing, and also i want to portray how different sorts of trauma can affect people and their futures.

in this universe, there are two plural characters. one of them im not struggling too much which - he isnt as developed as most of the others, but thats just because i havent had enough time for that, he does have a good story though and i feel like he'll be good rep :)

the other one, however.

they're a (paro/tulpa/trauma)genic system, depending on the watcher's interpretation. they come from an abusive family, their parents being Awful to them for as long as they can remember. they have around 5-6 headmates, though ive only focused a lot on 3, of them: their first host, a girl who formed Really early in their childhood, and Vlad. he used to act as their protector, and is also an anger holder, who can get quite aggressive sometimes. (fun fact, his name is inspired by Calma Vladimir by CDN :3 )

in the system's teens (13? or so), CPS take them out of their abusive home, and put them into a nicer one. yet, that's when Vlad's role starts becoming less useful than before, because he's still in survival mode - and out of fight or flight, he's definitely the Fight type. which will get him to act out, get into fights, break stuff... etc etc etc. the others are partially aware of this, and they let him do, because that's what they're used to ("there'll be consequences no matter what we do, why not let him have fun?", or something like that, they're all too used to their previous living situation for this ;w;)

now, in the universe, there is a pretty big... gang? mafia? criminal organization? something like that. it's directed by a man called Judas (it's not a religious reference on my side, he picked his own name and it makes sense he chose that one), who, ignoring the whole crimes thing, is a pretty great guy. he has a habit of taking in ppl going through hardships, mostly ones who are violent, and getting them to join him.

Judas has been seeing the system, mainly Vlad, for a long time. he picked up on how good at fighting they are, and how with a little bit of self-control, Vlad could make a good addition to his Whatever That Is. so one day, when they're 15, he approaches them and suggests they join him. Vlad accepts, and though it wasn't their original plan, everyone else ends up happy with it. so they move in with them, meet a bunch of people, get a found family with Judas and this one girl, yadda yadda happy ending.

besides.

the gang's main thing is killing people. they do it mostly to abusers, assholes, the ones who traumatized its members. it's like...their whole thing. which, yeah, makes sense i guess. but putting a system there feels like im pulling the whole "serial killer with multiple personality disorder" trope, which sucks ass.

they are a serial killer, they are a system, but both things just happen to be, no correlation between them. all the alters are aware of and ok with their current living situation, they'd probably pick it over any they've been in, and only bad people are dying anyways. it's not like Vlad is the only one doing that stuff, either - at the beginning he was, but not anymore.

i'll probably leave them this way, the whole storyline is already planned too, but is there any way to make it so it doesn't follow that one trope?

(pd, the other system does not join the gang, he actually escapes his shithole of a town and lives a pretty chill life with his friends. does this help separate being plural from being a criminal? since its 1/2 instead of both of them-)

I'm not sure you can actually have one not be the serial killer trope if they're literally in a murdering gang? But you are making an important balance by not having the second system be in that position. It at least makes an easier distinction between those two facts about the first system. Because theoretically, yeah! Those two things can coincide in a person, and it is possible to make an interesting story about it.

Something that that trope benefits(?) from here, is made less bad by, is that most of the times we see it in shows and movies, it's a one off, or we don't see how they got there, or it's been paired with another offensive trope (see also Split, with the body changing shape).

In the way you're framing it, it's softened by the other system being Not That, and the context as to how they got there. If it fits the characters, some remorse that it's part of their otherwise better life helps? But that's up to if you think that's something that would fit them.

I hope that was helpful

-Mod Tick Tock

[strawglicks]

Sorry for the ramble in your inbox incoming- I'm a really huge fan of your analysis type posts like the ones about Cathal and recently Flint ;A; So I hope its ok to maybe throw in my own 2 cents about Cogs/their society- (Sorry this gets rambly I thought about this last night and writing this like an hour after waking up lol)

I think what alot of people kind of (I wouldnt say ignore- more of:) don't really get is that I dont believe characters like Cathal or Flint have bad tendencies because they really want to in a way, (I kind of worded that poorly but point is) but because their society rewards and encourages that type of behavior. I think you said something kind of similar on Cathals post- But especially for Flint, whose a Bossbot (Who are literally the embodiment of a toxic workplace and elitism. I believe a old snippet from the TTO magazines says "They have no real skills of their own, just the ability to push down others and stay on top!" Or something to that nature.) he has to be demanding and imposing. There is no benefit to him in being kind. (Like looking at Misty for example) And don't get me wrong I don't believe that if Flint and Cathal were removed from Cog society they'd be better/objectively nicer (Like Flint not being condescending to Toons and Cathal not making people do things for him and being encouraged to try) But I do wonder how much of it is pressure, or how much of it is egged on and rewarded. Atleast in the aspects it relates to how they treat others.

(..And also I wonder what happens to Cogs that don't get jobs and are seen as ..not functioning. Since Graham was freaking the hell out in "Meeting Of Two Minds" over the possibility of not getting the job. I have a whole thing about this actually in my oc lore but thats another thing entirely I'll write about someday I swear)

Also I gasped when I saw the doodle of Graham in the MSI shirt finally a MSI listener Graham truther. I think he'd like the album "How I Learned To" and of course "You'll Rebel To Anything". I associate him mainly with the songs "Lights Out", "On It", and "You're No Fun Anymore" :p (This has been my favorite band since I was like 13 and now I get to spill all my opinions xD) I always imagined him doing the guitar backbend their bassist does! And my final hc is that Flint plays bass and Graham plays the main guitar. I think it fits them .. some people overlook bass when its actually pretty hard to learn from what I hear and vital to the song. (Like heres Feel Good Inc w/o the bass.. feels wrong x_x)

Anyways thanks for reading ;A; take care and happy new year!

RAHHHH EATING THIS UP YUM YUM YUM YES YES YOU GET IT

THe biggest issue with Cogs Inc is that it REWARDS and ENCOURAGES these poor behaviors, worsening these characters as people. ESPECIALLY cathal considering the position of power they’re in. I’m sure it applies to a ton of other cogs too, but unfortunately I haven’t gotten to them yet bc I’m not as insane abt them . LMAO

And yeah since cogs are literally built for work, it’s a wonder what happens to those who can’t find a job as easily as others. Hoping that gets built on since it’s clear in MOTM that these cogs have to actually apply and go to interviews and probably face some trial and error to land a job, just like people IRL.

ALSO. THE BAND HCS. I love it and you’re SOOOO RIGHT about the backbend that is so grahamcore. And yes I’m pretty sure Flint does play bass, I think his creator mailman said smth abt that on their blog . AND IM SO GLAD YOU BROUGHT UP FEEL GOOD INC bc i did draw flint in a demon days shirt in that same animatic . And ive def drawn them in the same shirt a couple times in the past too . I’ve always imagined him to be a Gorillaz fan, maybe graham too

Anyway ty for these thoughts im eating them up and leaving no crumbs . I love when ppl come to ramble in my inbox bc discussing this stuff IS SO FUN and a good outlet for me esp when i might be having art burnout rn .

[akaakeis]

oh nooooo i tripped and fell for u into ur ask box

eating ny ice cream rn ;; strawberry is such a weird flavour like if i had to choose and get one i would not get strawberry but if irs rhere at home im finishinf ALL of it

ALSO, DRAWING ON PEOPLE'S HANDS 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

anyways about the iwa smau!!! genuinely have no motivation rn #tweaks BUT i would like to say that the yn is shamelessly based off me like i have consumed acrylic paint on multiple occasions (today) (with ice cream)

ILYT!!!!! IM WRITING THIS RN SO I CANT RESPOND (CRIES)

lost a mark in my chem test today im tweaking

BUT THE FREAKY ENGLISH TEACHER SAID IM ON THE RIGHT TRACK AND DOING GOOD AND AN ATTENTIVE STUDENT AND LIKR????????? ERMMMM SHES INSANE BUT FHE ACADEMIC VALIDATION GOES SOOO HARD

also like lowkey icl i was hanging around ur blog again rn and thats why i decided to send an ask !! ur blog is so pretty rrrrr

I ALSO BASICALLY JUST PEAKED IN HS CUZ THE LIBRARIAN RECOGNISED ME AND GAVE ME A BOOK RECOMMENDATION AND LET ME TAKE IT EVEN THOUGH IT DIDN'T HAVE THE PROPER STUFF TO BE FILED AS BORROWED (like each book has a code and this one didnt and she STILL gave it to me) SO LIKE BASICALLY SHE TRUSTS ME BC IVE BEEN OVER HERE FOR LIKE A YESR AT LEADT TAKING A BOOK THEN COMING BACK 1-2 DAYS LATER CUZ I FINISHED IT LOLOLS

also about OUR iwa fic i was js thinking like,, fake dating this dumbass b word ushiwaka and hes like ?? why me ??? "ur names rhyme kind of" ?? wth ??

lowkey think im immune to anything thats in acrylic paint now bc i have Eaten So Much Of It

anyways the book is lowkey good i havent finished it YET but irs called the girl on the train and like woahhhhhh smth like that at our super conservative school is iNsane

i hope u feel better soon!!! if u dont ill fly over and idk. magic

i have a maths test tmr rjejsjskssk the topic is fun but I Don't Know what if i Fail

OSHIT I WAS SUPPOSED TO LOCK IN AND DO HW OOPS ERM HRU TELL ME AB UR DAY ETC ETC and also any sav x yaku tidbits youd like to drop <- forgot the ship name AND AND AND THE ANONS THINF IS SO REAK KMFG

ok byebye ily xx

ah thats a shame 😞😞 hope your knee or whatever u banged on the way in heals up well lina 😞

yum yum yum ice cream!! i hope ur enjoying it!! also thats so real i feel like strawberry ice cream is just an odd flavor... but true that i always eat the strawberry ice cream in the freezer just to spite my other roommate (with love!!!) LMAO

also real 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ i adore when people draw on me or let me draw on them it js makes me so happy <3

DONT FEEL PRESSURED TO WORK ON IT!! BE SPORADIC!! DO IT WHENEVER YOU GET IDEAS!!! WE WILL STICK AROUND TO READ WHENEVER U DECIDE TO WRITE

NOOO NOT THE CHEM TEST IM SORRY LINA :((( ITLL ALL WORK OUT THO

NOT THE ENGLISH TEACHER. IM SORRY SHES MY OPP FROM WHAT IVE HEARD ABOUT HER SHES FREAKY I FEAR. BUT FOR THE ACADEMIC VALIDATION I SUPPOSE I GET IT...

HELP i didnt ever realize how much time you spent on my blog like genuinely 😭 BUT THANK YOU SM!! im super proud of this theme even tho its not the most intricate <3

WOOOW THE LIBRARIAN RECOGNIZED YOU AND TRUSTED YOU W AN UNFILED BOOK??? i aspire to be you but i never step foot into my school library i much prefer my public library... there's sm more books that i read there!!! BUT THATS GENUINELY SO COOL WTF

bro that fic will genuinely be so funny 😭 like the quote we were yapping ab earlier "ushijima?? the hell?? you don't even go to the same school as him?? 😨" iwa would be more confused than anything at first AND I THINK THATS HILARIOUS!! and pls ushijima just AGREEING hes a closeted himbo i swear i swear i swear

alina im genuinely concerned over the fact that you CONSUME acrylic paint? but whatever? i guess? please dont eat too much that's definitely not meant to be consumed 🧍‍♀️

im gonna add that book to my tbr list!! i read the synopsis and it sounds pretty good tbh

THANK YOU!! my roomie is taking care of me so i'll probably be fine within the next few days 🙂‍↕️

AND GOOD LUCK!! im sure you'll do amazing dont even play w me rn alina YOU WILL DO SO SO SO WELL YOU LITTLE MATH NERD (affectionate)

OH YEAH GO DO HOMEWORK WTF 😭 IM GOOD! I FEEL BETTER TODAY <3 IVE BEEN IN BED SINCE I WOKE UP SO THERE ISNT MUCH TO TELL YOU ABOUT BUT UHHHH LAST NIGHT I WATCHED HOWLS MOVING CASTLE WITH MY ROOMMATE!! SAV X YAKU IS SAVORI!!! COURTESY OF BAKERY ANON MY LOVE 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ UMM I DONT HAVE TIDBITS RN BUT ILL DM YOU WITH RANDOM ONES SOMETIME DURING THE DAY TRUST!!

bye bye!! ily ily <3

[episodesixnickyroth]

hi. infodump pt2.

i wanted to talk about tsurugi n nishi. erm. i feel like.. i desperately need to do more w them. Uhh ill give a quick summary of them

basically, tsurugi and nishi were classmates in dra. id say tsurugi would be aboouutt. 17 or 18. (w/o the "its actually been x years" plot twist of dangan) so hes ab 5-6 years older than nishi. tsurugi is the ultimate police officer and basically he believes that all criminals should die and dont deserve a second chance at life. he also believes that sacrificing the minority (criminals) for the majority (rest of population) is morally correct.

hes fairly protective of the dra cast, and especially so with nishi since theyre a child. in ch3 someone close to nishi (kinji) turns out to be the blackened. tsurugi, as usual, starts to hate on him and argue w him bc he hates criminals. kinji argues back and says that since technically he killed for his motive (monokuma threatened to kill like a hundred children that attended the church kinji works at) it would be him "sacrificing the minority (the rest of dra cast) for the majority (a hundred children)" then itd be morally correct by tsurugis standards. tsurugi is FUUUCKEDDD up by this and goes a little crazy insane.

ANYWAY. after this, the night after the trial, tsurugi walks nishi back to their room since theyre still pretty upset about kinjis death. tsurugi pulls a shin w kanna and starts subjecting nishi to his fucked up sillay beliefs (in his mind hes protecting them,, bc he got this ideology from his father who taught it to him)

poor little 12 yr old nishi is now FUUCKKEDD up by this. they start questioning themself and their relation to kinji and if maybe theyre a bad person too for trusting kinji and if they should start only trusting tsurugi (oh no). Uhh anyway.

that was basically just a recap of all the important stuff w them. anyway. what i WANTED to explore is how this would affect nishi post-sdra2. cuz theyre literally dating and living with Worlds Worst Man (syobai) and they still, in a deeper part of their mind, trust tsurugi

like.. they probably question themself sometimes and wonder if they should leave syobai (i mean. Some People think that they should but for other reasons) or wonder if tsurugi would be disappointed in them.

tsurugi was basically one of their only support systems when they were younger. other than rantaro, their older brother (YES I PUT RANTARO INTO MY AU. crazy right. but technically hes rantaro amani and not rantaro amami soo spike chunsoft dont come for me)

okay. im done. sorru not sorry for the paragraphs again........ ur like the only person i can infodump to as of this moment (EVERYONE ELSE DIEDED😭😭)

"basically, tsurugi and nishi were classmates in dra...."

oh so tsurugi is just a normal cop okay! sdra not having the trope dangan has is honestly a shock I but a good one that trope. is straight ASSCHEAKS. sacrifising the minority for the majority where did I hear that before coughs majority vote...

"hes fairly protective of the dra cast..."

OHHHH MORALS BEING PROVEN WRONG BY MORALS OHHHH THATS SO GOOD tsurugi go fucked up insane... RIP for Nishi that kinji was the blackened though he got RIPPEd away from them. banger motive though I like that

"ANYWAY. after this, the night after the trial..."

OH IVE HEARD THISS BEFORE OOOO... protecting more like projecting. and of course it came from the father were else,, and genuinely rip for Nishi that would apsolutely fucking SUCK especially at 12

"poor little 12 yr old nishi is now FUUCKKEDD up by this...."

UNDERSTANDABLY BUT OOOOOOH NOOOO... Nishi NOOOO my they/them...

"that was basically just a recap of all the important stuff w them..."

can we get syobais a worlds worst man ever mug.. and that is so interesting to explore honestly, its like bro is battling themselves . they got loving worlds worst man ever and also the cop guy that says all sucky people should DIE.

"like..."

nishi (oc) dear tsurugi may be more than disappointed in them I'll Be Frank Here

"tsurugi was basically one of their only support systems when they were younger...."

RANTAROO!!!! THE BROTHER EVER!!! but OUGH that is actually so devastating I would die a million times, one of the only support systems they had just would nooooot support the whole Syobai thing ouuuugh. spike chunsoft do NOT sue nishi I will come and fight you all with sticks.

eeeeeeeeee I love your guy man I DO care about them veryery much . I am oh so so rry that I didnt answer for four hours I got distracted

[m0ther-of-p3arl]

soooo i'm thinking of writing an au

just gonna throw that out there so yall won't be surprised if i randomly throw a fic or seven in your faces <3

FOR REFERENCE: this is gonna be a long post of me talking about shit i wanna write, it's mostly for my future self to look back and so i have all my thoughts in one place (i'm unorganized ok) and im publishing it so it's easier to find, but this is really mostly for my personal benefit in the future but if you all find it interesting yay thats great :)

anyhow

if i /do/ write an au, and that's a big if as my irl friends know about this acc and the teasing i could endure would be /endless/, it would be:

empires s1, with maybe some traffic characters thrown in- i don't feel like wc meshes very well with empires (else i would add it), unless the witchcraft witches were like at gem's academy or s2 shubble's witch school (OOOH that's an idea in and of itself lol

probably flower husbands based, or maybe mean gills, as they're slowly clawing up my mcyt ship tierlist... i'll have to think a bit on that one, but scott will most likely be the main character, cuz he was my very very first exposure to the wonderful world of empires and mcyt in general (found him through lauren, watched ep 1 of empires s2 and was hooked)

only very loosely based on canon events, i'd more be wanting to play around with the characters. therefore, out of the 3 ideas i have (more on that in a bit) i'd be more inclined to pick the more modern-day ones- though there would be fantasy elements of course like babe its empires

i have 3 main ideas that i feel like i could use- i'll put em in a poll if yall wanna vote, more info on each of them underneath

so yeah the first two are awfully similar- the main difference being that in the first option, the characters would be teachers, and in the second, students. imma go through all these a lil more in-depth, as i have ideas for all of them and i wanna see which one you all would rather read and i shall weigh that in on which one i'll (possibly) (ALLEGEDLY) write

teachers: scott is a teacher/the headmaster (i'll decide which later) at empires university (PLACEHOLDER NAME i swear i will come up with a better one) (probably) and jimmy is a new teacher who's just come onto the scene. he continually messes things up and scott is fed up with him and so they have a CHAT but obviously scott is traumatized by something in his past probably xornoth related or relating to one of the death games (life series) and jimmy is just CUTE but scott doesn't realize it and scott goes on being dumb about it and there is ANGST and such

students: basically the same general plot, but scott lives with horrible parents and jimmy becomes a reprieve and they become like best friends but they both have a secret crush on eachother (like in trust au omdsfksjdlkf go read it right now stop reading this rambling post and go read trust au SO GOOD SLDKFJ its by @/thetomorrowshow) and eventually scott is living at jimmy's house full time (jimmy has a cod tank in his room bc ofc) and then stuff happens heehhehehe no spoilers but again: ANGST

the main deal with these is there's ANGST (but also fluff because the two go hand in hand)

war: this is the main different one sooo it's set in the original empires world, but the cod empire and rivendell have been at war for decades and scott and jimmy hate each other but THEN they like meet one day and neither realizes who the other is until too late because they've never seen each other in real life and it's blasphemy and they like each other and all that yadayadayada ANGST

ummmmm anyway that's my fucking long rambling post done good graciousness this is the longest post i've ever done- anyway let me know (or don't, again, for my personal benefit) which one you would rather read and if any of them sound engaging at all- personally, i'm leaning towards students or war over teachers, i was full-in students but now i have so many great ideas for the war one- god i'm so messed up

that will be all

farewell

[virentdivision]

self review

these are all tags from one post here a couple months ago

#but i think what i've been trying to do is STOP fixing my art and just learn to make more drawings and move on

I have leant into this belief ✅ and it's good, though nuanced... as I don't want to start a lot of drawings, I like to take my time even on flawed artwork, ideally. I'm more leisurely. I try to avoid negative feelings, and if I truly feel a lack of interest, I will just erase it and start over. I try to build healthy attachments and relationships with my artworks.

#because everything i ever draw i dont post. i spend days on fixing it. ... I still do this but I have less of an issue about it due to me placing incentives that allow legroom while still putting a bit of pressure. Such as, "I have to queue up something for captaindark once every week..." It's subjective and easygoing enough, but is a tangible structure for me to take solace in. I'm not all or nothing incentives anymore. ... and i lose interest because i got new ideas during it... cycle repea#thats why i have 1000 wips / unposted art This is only an issue SOMETIMES! Since most days I am actually weaponizing this positively for my OC projects. The only time in recent times this happened negatively was when I was drawing in front of people and distracted myself. I can't tell if that's net negative or net positive, but I did still do stuff that I considered productive during it, and ultimately, all art has meaning. I just wouldn't want to go overboard and abandon the projects that have MORE meaning to me (and others) personally. #and i hope that i develop the artstyles i want#which is what i've been thinking about a lot lately ❌ No and Yes ?? ✅ ❌: I'm starting to not care about drawing to obtain style. When I start drawing things that make me think this way, I try to avoid this way of thinking and push past it into whatever style comes naturally in that moment. It actually takes a lot of mental effort to disengage with such perfectionist habitual thought, but I'm in a creative high so it's easier than before. As in, it's still hard, but I have more creative energy to spend instead of having to give up too soon. ✅: I've realized I have a style. I just might not like it, and honestly, the reasons for why I don't like it are kind of nebulous and stupid and based in perfectionist thought, so I'm active on uprooting that. Hopefully I see fruition of my efforts soon! I would love to see some abundant visible change on it, have wanted to for months or maybe years regarding my captaindark blog artworks specifically. #there will be no progress if i dont post. ❌ No, and I've learned this thanks to my OC projects giving me a tangible sense of progress even if I'm actively avoiding showing what I'm doing. And that mindset has crossed over to everything else I do. When I start working on those other things, I maintain my creative high outlook and realize "oh, so it's this way, here too" right? I kind of don't know yet since I haven't started a bunch of work in other stuff (which is a good thing right now) but that's what makes sense, and I'll probably purposely make the realization happen.

#i just don't want posting to feel forced...)

I have leant into this belief ✅ and it's good, though nuanced... Same with my art, I'm trying to "build healthy attachments and relationships" with my blogs. I don't like twt, so I'll just post there in a way that makes me forget about it. Even if there's value to posting there, I just don't feel like it, so I compromise and do what I want. That way, when I get nice reactions, it's a pleasant surprise that I don't have to dwell on about.

even if i don't have anyone looking#(that's mostly a faultdue to me being shy and not posting to where people will see it... I actually still think about my lack of audience sometimes, but it's such a mixed train of thought. Because... I like being reserved and "safe" ... but I want to build something for myself, too. Then I imagine, what if I release a game and pretty much no one bothers to play it? But I don't really believe that thought, since an artwork as well rounded and tangible as a game existing in my gallery is a building block to something that will attract attention eventually. Even if it's only the few people you care about and directly told them to play. Even if people don't understand the message or didn't like it that much. I think I would still overall feel pretty good about it, since I'm practical about gaining experience. We'll see.

[castlebyersafterdark]

I have a lot of silly thoughts that 🤐 but honestly the real fantasy is to hit the thrift w this weirdo. Please.

well this is why i love the a cruel summer with you au fic that was mentioned here a while ago, you said you had a gander but it wasnt for you and fair enough OBV, but i loved it cos later on car guy mike (sky blue mustang convertible, i mean PLEASE) drives a VERY sassy will to thrift store shopping not-date-that-is-definitely-a-date. it was tooo juicy (but not spicy enough iygm haha)

so yeh, please do share those zipped up thoughts cos COME ON thats what were in this realm of the 'dom for haha and i also wanna know how on earth we can find finn attractive in this green plaid shirt car guy state (i mean, i totally would but i wanna hear your thoughts about those pasty hairy legs lmao)

As I'm finally getting around to this one we've seen my anons have gotten BOLDER and I am LOVING it - but I am still keeping a line between what I unleash on the world vs. what I nonchalantly write about the fictional characters! I don't know what the line is until I approach it, but it's been interesting finding it! I don't think it's a surprise or a secret that I'm very attracted to these men and I do feel ok talking about that now - but maybe not in excruciating details hahaha.

But I mean, talking about his pasty hairy legs is pretty neutral haha. He's just! He's interesting. Because a lot of people very much find him super attractive for his unconventional looks, others think he's unappealing completely. I've always been into more unconventional beauty, been attracted to odd stuff about people. Noah's pretty classically attractive, for example, at least in my opinion. He's really hot! But in a different way than Finn is hot to me. Funny personal anecdote with 💙 because if I go too long without mentioning him I'll probably have an aneurysm. Anyway, he always laughs and calls me a weirdo when I tell him that his sideburns turn me on hahahaha. But I mean it! It's not a joke! I find odd things hot about guys 🤣

I have heard that car guy Mike is a big part of that fic and I'm super glad for it!! And aww, thrift store shopping date? I love that in general and for them. I really do appreciate the fic existing because that's admirable to write that much and the writing that I did read was very good - I just think it's still a skip for now, because the word count is massive and with it not being quite what I'm after, I don't think I'd dedicate the time at this point. Maybe one day. And the lack of spice isn't entirely a deal breaker for fic with me, because I read all levels from G to E in this fandom and I've loves stuff from the full rating spectrum. It just depends. I just wish everyone was normal about the existence and other's enjoyment of all of those levels.

[irishvampireboy]

YESSSS!!!! HIIIII!!!! sorry for getting back late, not felt that social today!

that makes sense! i feel like my stranger things special interest comes back in full swing every few years and it’s in that dormant state again. unfortunately. but what can i do!!

that’s totally okay! i get this 100%, i’m a little scared to come off anon anyways so this works out perfectly fine for me ^w^

well. okay. the thing is, my current hyperfixation is a little embarrassing for me to reveal to you… and it would make it very obvious to find me in your followers LOL. i will hide in shame!!! 😅 other things i do like are: music, video games, writing (fanfic, poetry, etc.), other word related stuff (ex: webweaves), movies/tv shows (have admittedly watched more tv shows than movies at this point), and probably other things i can’t quite think of right now! i didn’t list all that much but i am a little foggy in the brain rn :’))

that’s so sweet of you! you’ve been on my mind as well, i just didn’t know what to Exactly say to you lol. but i’m here now!!!!!

glad to hear you’re okay, that’s really nice. i heard your air conditioning is out :((( i hope you’ll be able to survive and such. god knows i cannot get a wink of sleep when it’s hot. sending you cool vibes!

i’ve been having a rough go of it lately but i’m hoping i get a breather soon from bad things happening or my brain convincing me everything’s gone to shit haha. trying to be kind to myself as best i can. pushing through.

thank you for being so kind about stuff <3 it’s genuinely so sweet and cute to see you happy to see me!!! /p it feels nice to be missed even if i am anonymous and a stranger more or less. it’s lovely to be back! i like being here! was just hard to find footing for a bit, you know? anyhow, feels nice to see you again!!!! i’m glad i get to be a little guy who’s around for you💘💞

-🦇 anon

Ooohh i totally get that!!!! Hyperfixations that ebb and flow are a thing for me too!!! Like for me, my mom just took me to the movie IF. VERY CUTE. but ryan reynolds was there so now he's back in my brain living rent free. Which was actually good timing cuz the Wolverine and Deadpool movie will be out soon so i can be extra excited to go see that! 🤣🤣🤣

Oohhh hahhaaha now I'm like 👀👀👀👀👀👀 but no it's totally okay! I wont go looking! But i do like games! Im really only good at like, racing games, pokemon, and the two newest zelda games. I never really played the older ones when i was young. But i adore, botw and totk. I love writing too, really only fanfic and not very often these days but when the inspo hits i like to dabble! Hahaha! And ive seen sooooo many movies and shows so thats probably a good place to start!!! Tho i am bad about watching newer shows... my brain has a "its not the right time yet" thing, for pretty much all media. Very annoying, but I get to things eventually. When the times right! Haha!

Air came back this morning thankfully!!! And i got a few hours of sleep once things cooled down! So sorry your brain is being rude and that possibly also life is being rude!!! I hope things get better! I'll send healing and good vibes your way!!!

Yesss!!! My batty little guy!!! And i totally get it! And absolutely no pressure to send a ton of messages. I 100% know how it feels sometimes to just not be feeling it. Or not knowing what to say. So definitely dont like, push yourself, especially if you're not feeling up to it mentally! I'll be here! No plans on going anywhere else!!! Just send stuff when and if you feel up to it! And I'll be happy to see you when you swing by!!! 🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

[im-faelu]

where'd you go????

hi! if you're reading this you're either a stranger that clicker on my profile with a curiosity to sate, a worried friend or aquaintance or somebody who's stalking me (in which case.. why??) i would like to prefrace this with the fact that i͟ a͟m͟ o͟k͟a͟y͟,͟ s͟a͟f͟e͟,͟ a͟n͟d͟ n͟o͟t͟ d͟e͟a͟d͟ o͟r͟ s͟o͟m͟e͟ s͟h͟i͟t͟!͟

ive decided to take a break from using discord in my day to day life, and as such i'm just..putting it down. cold turkey. i feel right now that i dont really have friends or people to consistently talk to and because of that discords become largely uneccesary for me right now. I decided that i wanted to try and focus on personal projects and self-reflection. throughout the 10 days that 2024 has offered i've been largely by myself. waking up, having little chit-chats with aquaintances and friends and not really actually being around people in a way thats meaningful. Being alone and with my own thoughts and not generally having people around to keep myself grounded, in the late-nights spent gaming i had a moment of weakness. I couldn't shake the thought, "What if i died?". Generally i dont usually feed into these thoughts. but it struck me. "How long would it take for anyone in my world to notice?" And i dont like that. I dont like it at all. Thoughts like this are spurred on by my BPD and make me want to rapidly remove myself as a test to others. and I dont like feeling like that. So, why am i leaving if it seemingly looks like that said spur of the moment bout-of rapid removal? Because i want to feel like i am not inside the box. I dont want to feel like i'm doing this because of that feeling, i want to do this because taking myself from any social setting makes that impossible. I want to spend my time and days not having to worry about others, and as it is i'm not generally using discord already, but i feel like removing myself from the platform for a bit makes things better. While im gone im just going to be working on my own personal projects and taking the steps i need to, to be a better and happier person who isn't neccesarily reliant onothers. i feel largely that i do not like the person that i am. So i will be taking my time and carefully putting together who i am and what i'm all about. I feel i lost this aspect of myself in my last serious relationship with my ex, hayden, and with the subsequent decline of my friendship with my friend ana. They are not the core-root of these issues but i feel like these things have obsfuscated my process of being. and for that i need to put the puzzle pieces back together.

WHEN WILL YOU RETURN?

Honestly? Iunno. I want to come back in a months time. but i just wana focus on stuff i want to do, not worry about anyone else but myself for a bit.

WHERE CAN I FIND YOU??

You can find me on other platforms, and games. If we've met and talk you probably know me from a social media (Twitter) platform or a multiplayer game (FFXIV, Roblox).

HELP I DONT HAVE YOU ON EITHER!

On TUESDAYS and FRIDAYS between 2-7, I will be semi-active, but invisible status on Discord. Any other time, and i will not have the Application open nor actively checking for it. Please leave me a message and i will get back to you within 15m of me reading said-messege. If i feel comfortable enough i will lend you my twitter, as it's my main-platform that i use every day. No minors allowed and i tweet absolutely everything i want. w/ little filter. If you've read this to its entirety, congratulations! im happy you care enough to worry about my wellbeing. If you chose to skim parts and not neccesarily care about alot of the stuff ive said in this, i'm a little dissapointed. Why even bother? If you skipped it all, you dissapoint me immensely. or you're a stranger that doesnt care, either way. jump off a microwave. As my closing words i would like to say that for the duration of 1/10/24, for the next few hours i'll be semi-active handing out my twitter user to those who wish. I will be working on myself and my own projects! Till then travelers...

[taeyungie]

em, well.. he called me today. the irony of it all is apparently when i was talking w/ that 1 guy after my ex years ago, i only told him cus he asked me out & i apparently said he didnt need to know that stuff and i dont remember ever saying that but he said he was hurt/caught off guard & therefore never shared any of his personal relations with me. i think i blacked those yrs out. i went thru a very bad & messy breakup and wanted a distraction, i don't remember him ever asking me out then but he said he remembered very well. i feel so fucking stupid. this basically all happened bc of me. and u were right, he said he /always/ had those feelings even after my ex but i felt they weren't there... so i never attempted anything until i built up our relationship again which is how it is now. but, the real kicker is.. i told him that i didnt want to be put in a position where if he was serious about me, that he'd talk to other ppl, but he said im basically asking for commitment and he cant give that to me unless i show that i'm willing to let him come see me or vice versa (which i just need more time for), until then, he's not going to tell me if he's messing with anyone but he said if things do get serious with someone, then he'll let me know to not lead me on. thats not what i wanted to hear. basically he's open to whatever happens with whoever, even if he cares deeply about me, but he cant promise to not talk to other ppl and i know its selfish, i just wanted him to wait for me, esp after all this time with trying and failing with wrong timings. the way he said "IF i get into a relationship, i'll tell u" gets me cause i'll only know if he makes it official, he said thats how its gonna be. and i honestly feel like i'll end up pushing him away cus the reality of that being possible hurts too much. he said he'll just have to accept it then. but even after talking i still feel as lost. i feel sad, ashamed i said those things i truly don't remember. but now i'm confused with my feelings. i know this is going to change everything. i can already feel myself wanting to pull away emotionally & put the guard i barely let down back up 😣

i am sorry sunshine :( but i'm really happy that you guys had the talk, you need to stay in contact with him no matter what, the silence can be the worst thing to do right now, so please try your best not to become closed off. the fact that you're both so hurt by this situation is so visible, my heart is breaking. although i really do understand both of you, and he is clear about what he expects and it's in your hands to decide what to do with it 🥺 you know... you have to understand that he is just trying to be happy too, just like we all do. it doesn't mean he only cares about himself, he was there for you through the bad times and he did wait for you, honey, but the thing happened years ago and he might be just tired of waiting, he just wants to find happiness and love too... i'm pretty sure he's probably just as hurt and confused by this situation as you are, but he cares about you and he wants to be with you, but maybe he cannot handle long-distance relationship, maybe he is tired of waiting, maybe there are other reasons he doesn't want to share because it's hurting him too much at this point, yeah? he probably started closing up on you because of that as well, that's why he stated his feelings in such harsh way. he probably doesn't mean to hurt you at all, he is just trying to protect himself.

so please, don't get me wrong, i may not be giving you the best advice or making you feel better which i'm really sorry for :( but i want to stay objective because the situation is tough, and help you understand how to deal with it, to look at your situation in a different light. I'm trying to guess what can be the issue and what you guys are going through, nothing I say is 100% right because I don't know the exact details and I will never know how exactly each of you is feeling. but what i know for sure is that one can stay strong for long enough, sweetheart :(

i understand that you might have blocked out the memories because of traumatic past and that is completely valid and I'm really sorry for what you went through, you deserve the best of love and care :( it's something he should be understanding about especially that he asked you out when you were still in pain, you probably weren't ready for something serious and i will allow myself to guess the guy you talked with was not considered as something you were serious about, right? you probably hoped for it, looked for it, but deep inside you probably might've been looking for a distraction, something to make you feel better, right? and since he was your best friend it was a different situation, although he probably chose to ask in a bad moment, he shouldn't blame you entirely for that and now act like it's all your fault, but i also understand why he was caught off guard and hurt by that, he was angry and jealous, he wanted to be with you and realizing you didn't choose him was probably very painful, although now he might feel like you realized you have feelings for him because you have no other options, and he wants you a strong and secure feeling from you to feel safe in it, but please don't get upset with my words, let me tell you something first, love.

Let me tell you a story, I myself also went through a similar thing and i also had to deny my best friend a long time ago, because of other reasons but one of the main ones was long distance, i never loved him but i cared for him that's another difference because your friend actually HAS feelings for you, but i know how my friend has felt when i kept explaining him why we can't be together, it made me feel terrible. yet, his feelings for me didn't lessen apparently, and to this day, sometimes, he still implies that his crush on me never went away. but in the meantime he was in many other relationships, serious ones and purely physical ones, while also not telling me much, i probably don't know about a lot but it's his life and not my business - my point is that, he also tried to be happy even while still actively hoping i would give him a chance, because he cares for me more than he does for the people he dated (but again in my story it didn't affect me because i never loved him that way). now picture yourself in our situation, he actually does love you but you guys can't be together right now because of some reasons, and he probably isn't feeling confident about your feelings for him because of the past events, which is why he asks you for "100% yes" or "100% no" right now. unless you give him an answer he waited for for a long time, he has the right to try and look for happiness elsewhere and not involve you in it, he might not be comfortable with sharing that he is having flings with others with someone he actually loves, simply because he doesn't want to hurt you, but it's just natural that he is looking for distractions, he is not looking for someone to replace you but he's also clearly not sure of your feelings for him, do you know what i mean now? he doesn't want the past to repeat, when he already waited for a long time, maybe tried to move on even. i know you don't want him to treat you like a 2nd choice and what i just said might look exactly like he's doing it but i personally don't see it that way, that REALLY is not the case, in my opinion it's the opposite and you are clearly his 1st choice, from what i deducted he also just told you that, but since you were/are out of reach he is trying to find other ways, even if it hurts him that they're not you.

don't close your heart up on him, honey. i know you're anxious and in pain, just try to understand his position, alright? you're both hurting a lot but you care for each other deeply and misunderstanding is not something that should be an obstacle, so please, the only way out of it is to talk to each other and be honest. maybe you could consider making some sacrifices to defeat things that stay in your way of saying "yes" , if relationship with him is something you truly want?

[bigwishes]

I would wish to find a bag of rugby kit. I’m approaching my 30s, perhaps I should take playing back up again, or see how it fits.

Oh mate, easy done, you could have always just gone down to your local club and pinched a uniform and started played, but you wanted the magic way so we can do it the magic way.

You find yourself in the changing room of a rugby club, it smells of man musk so bad it makes your eyes water. Don't try asking me for a kit you wanted to find one so start lookin.

Ah, I see you've found a kit, probably left by a club goer, maybe you could join the club too, we'll see how you like it.

Sure the kit smells awful but thats what you get for using someone else's stuff, I hope none of the blokes on the field don't recognise who it belongs to because that might spell trouble. You wouldn't want to get bashed by big ass rugby lads, but its fine, the only identifying mark you can find is a name written on the tag "Goliath". Well no one can see the name on the tag it'll be fine.

You can hear the blokes on the field yelling as you walk out, it sure looks competitive for a casual game and the blokes seem to be tackling the shit out of each other harder than you expected, but no turning back now they're all eyeing you to get your ass over on the field so they can keep playing. You head over nervous, but a lil excited. You join the line up and everything is quite for a moment and you hear whistle blow.

"okay, casual game, no pre-"

before you could finish your thought you were slammed in a pile of rugby blokes.

You feel something start to grow,

"fuck" you think to yourself "please don't let that be a boner"

But it wasn't, well you definitely had one, but that's not what was growing. In between the guys your body starts to grow, you thighs fill out into strong muscular legs like that of a pro player, you chest inflates with muscle and a layer of fat and hair begins to cover your whole body. The chaos ended and you see the club coach come over and start yelling at some of the players but you finally notice what happened to you.

"W-what the fuck happend to me"

You had to get off the field your uniform was tight around your new massive body, and you feel the weight of your new package straining against the fabric, it was a hot experience and you notice your boner start to come back, but, the game was so fun, maybe just 15 more minutes.

You keep playing for a few hours before being told to get off the field, most guys had gone home and the club coach tells you to pack it in as actual players will be arriving soon.

Walking off to the change rooms you cannot believe what happened, you got a second wind in life, and a club that's fun to play at. You can't wait to come back tomorrow after work.

Staring at the mirror you smile at the new you, but something is wrong, a ringing in your ears. Your head is fucking killing you like 16 years worth of concussions all hit at once. Stumbling forward your head smashes into the mirror cracking it. Correcting your stance you stare in the broken mirror and feel the same sensation of growth again. Watching yourself you notice as your new body continues to fill out with mass and start to get taller. The kit stretches over your body making the jersey look like a crop top. Drool begins to form in the corner of your mouth and drip down to your chin. The club uniform begins to smell clean as it seeps into your skin. Your pours erupt with sweat and stench 20x worse than what the uniform ever was and the headache starts to subside.

Two men walk into the changing room, one being the club coach and another a tall clean cut guy in a suit.

"and this bloke right 'er is a big fella we call Goliath"

you look at them trying to come up with words but all that comes out is "I-I-I-m-m- me- me big" lifting your meaty hand your sloppily whip the drool off your chin and smear it on your cheek.

"yeah, big guy ain't go no brains up there, but he's built like a brick shit 'ouse"

"Alright Tim, we'll buy him, I'll give you $50k for this one"

"FUCK YEAH JOHN, 'ell be a great player for ya"

"how do you keep fining these players"

"ya know me john, I got the magic touch"

They keep talking but you cant figure out the business talk, you just stupidly blink and keep drooling. The next thing you know you are on a bus with a bunch of other players arriving at a stadium with a roaring crowd.

Sorry mate, unlucky, the coach of the club wished he could sell players to the pro teams, so I gave him a bunch of cursed uniforms. Most of them didn't do too much from a size up and enslaving them to the pro team that bought them, they could still be themselves, just forced to be pro players. You on the other hand stumbled on the Goliath kit and well now look at you.

7ft tall brick wall rugby machine!

well, you did say you want to play more so get out there and have fun boys!

[yandereloversblog]

Hello!! Can I request a sweet and caring reader with golden freddy?? I really love how you write him!! He's my favorite too so it is okay if not!! I just came from your Wattpad and I must say that you are underrated!! I love your stories ♡ sorry if I have any grammar mistakes, English isn't my first language. Thats all :]

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄!𝐆𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐞𝐧 𝐅𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐲 -> 𝚂𝚠𝚎𝚎𝚝 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝙳𝚊𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐

  ───────•°˖~❉᯽❉~˖°•───────  

> 𝗙𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗼𝗺: 𝙵𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝙽𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 𝙰𝚝 𝙵𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚍𝚢'𝚜 1

> 𝗖𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗿: 𝙶𝚘𝚕𝚍𝚎𝚗 𝙵𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚍𝚢

> 𝗪𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: 𝚈𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝙱𝚎𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚘𝚛, 𝚃𝚘𝚡𝚒𝚌 𝙱𝚎𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚘𝚛 , 𝚄𝚗𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚝𝚑𝚢 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚃𝚘𝚡𝚒𝚌 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚍𝚜𝚎𝚝, 𝙼𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚙𝚞𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝙱𝚎𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚘𝚛, 𝙼𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚞𝚛𝚍𝚎𝚛.

> 𝗧𝘆𝗽𝗲 𝗢𝗳 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁: 𝙳𝚛𝚊𝚋𝚋𝚕𝚎-𝙸𝚖𝚊𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚜

  ───────•°˖~❉᯽❉~˖°•─────── 

•I love writing fluffy stuff, only downside when your blog is meant to be yandere focused.

•Human Goldie section- or like, Bot Golden Freddy but he can turn into a human version of himself-

  ───────•°˖~❉᯽❉~˖°•─────── 

This caring side to you is probably what attracted Goldie in the first place. The sheer adoration of your voice made his nonexistent, cold, dead heart flutter when you first met.

"Oh, hello." You sweetly smiled up at him, your eyes making Goldie stop functioning for a few seconds before he replied "Hi..." He replied back, hoping to not scare you too much from suddenly speaking "Do you need something?" Yet you ignored it, focusing back on the screen that displayed the halls than him "No I just... I just came to check..." The golden bear was at a loss for words when he looked at you, weren't you suppose to be scared?

"That's real nice of you." You giggled, glancing back at him with a grin that made the other flinch in surprise "I'm kinda working right now so you can wait and rest for me over there." You told him as you pointed at the extra chair on the room, and like a dumbass; Goldie sat down 'I- what am I doing here???' He glared at you in annoyance and was about to say something before stopping... He opened his mouth and closed it again, watching you work with a sudden emotion fluttering inside his soul.

And that's how Goldie kept visiting you, now you're just used to him hanging around and clinging to you, he keeps driving everyone away in annoyance because they kept interrupting your time with him!

"You're so soft~" You giggled happily, running a hand through Goldie's hair, he was literally sitting on the floor with his head on your lap as you petted him "Mmmmh, you can touch it for however long you want to [Y/N]." Goldie let out a small smile, adoring your compliments and gestures, previous sadistic needs to fight Chica who dared come so close to your office were gone by just a small touch.

"Thank you then! I'll indulge myself~" You playfully grinned and actually leaned down to give him a small peck on the head. Goldie flinched in surprise, his eyes wide from the affectionate contact "Can I..." The blond began, voice soft and quiet "Hmm? What did you say?" You smiled apologetically at making him repeat himself "I... I want to kiss you back... May I?" He looked up at you wish such a shy yet determined expression you didn't have the heart to refuse him.

"Sure... Yeah, you can!" Your approval immediately had Goldie on his feet, he stared at you with a blushing, red face, expression gentle as he cupped your face with his gloved hands and then leaned down, pecking you on the lips and making you flinch in surprise "U-um... Sorry I- [Y/N]!?" Goldie quickly held both your shoulders in surprise when he saw you nearly fall forward after he leaned away. You quickly brought your hands up to hide your face "W-what?" Goldie cursed himself for stuttering, did he make you cry!?

"I-it's just... I didn't expect you to kiss my lips..." You peeked from your hands to look at him and something immediately snapped in Goldie as he stared at you, then swiftly leaned down and kissed you again "Goldie!" You squeaked in surprise and glared at him "Couldn't help it, you were just so cute~"

Despite being basically immortal, with incredible healing ability, Goldie does get hurt to a degree where they won't heal unless somebody specifically takes care of them... Like sticking a shard of class on his arm "accidentally"

"Does it hurt?" You softly mumbled, a genuinely concerned look on your face while carefully removing the shard of glass "Nope." Goldie replied mindlessly, looking at you with loving eyes, he wasn't lying. It barely hurt- in fact, it didn't hurt at all because you were taking care of it.

"Don't lie, it's okay to tell the truth to me..." You stared a little as his wound closed up nearly instantly once the glass was removed, then looked up at him, unintentional puppy dog eyes to plead for Goldie to tell the truth. Goldie nearly died from the caring gesture and just leaned on your shoulder "Yeah it hurted a bit..." And you instantly started cuddling him and cooing at the other.

"I love you so much my sweetheart... More than anything and everything."

[reigenhusband]

Psychic Wedding Time!

Art by @/cowboyologist

After months of holding back, we finally tied the ole knot! Me and the conman are officially hitched today September 10, 2021!

This silly little blonde anime man means an awful lot to me and its really more than I can say. These months with him have been a great help.

When I went through some of the roughest things I've ever gone through, I had him to think about for comfort. He is a little part in what keeps me going and I wish I could thank him for everything. He sparks a lot of joy so I think I'm gonna keep him!

I've never been happier and I'm so lucky to call him husband! He's had such a positive impact and I love him so, so much.

Special thank you to my friends and of course our son Mob who carried the rings!

Under the cut is a little fic about getting ready for the wedding. Thanks everyone for your support!

Reigen squinted at his reflection, dark eyes hauntingly focused on a strand of hair that didn't take to the product he put in it. A grunt of dismay rumbled low in his throat.

"Um…Reigen?" 

"Just a second, Serizawa. Almost got it."

The taller man's voice wavered but he managed to hold fast and keep his confidence. Reigen could almost hear his hands wringing. 

"Er...Well. Its just...you've been staring at yourself for a little over 20 minutes now and you haven't moved and…"

Reigen sucked his teeth and pressed his palm firmly to the side of his head. Damned strand of hair! Slick like the rest of it! Don't you know know day it is?!

"What I mean is..! Are you alright?" Serizawa finally asked, his voice heavy with concern. "Since it's your wedding and all I figured you'd be nervous but you seem really on edge. Is something bothering you?" 

The blonde twitched.

 "W...what are you talking about? Of course not! I'm calm and-" He stopped abruptly and slammed his hands flat on either side of the mirror, his eyes wide and bloodshot upon inspection of his suit. A fleck of black thread pervaded his white vest and he looked around frantically for the lint roller. "You thought you could hide but you can't best Reigen Arataka." He muttered as he furiously went over his all but pristine wedding attire. 

His best man scratched his own cheek nervously and looked on with clear uncertainty. "If you're sure." 

Once he was satisfied after a thorough inspection and having Serizawa scrutinize the back, he dropped into a chair. Nearby was a table decorated in what was probably a thousand congratulatory flowers from clients. He exhaled and stared a hole into the arrangement of colors. His heart was pounding. His brow, coupled with his hands, were visibly slick with chilled sweat. His stomach was full of stones. 

He met his own gaze in the mirror again. He looked well kept and yet...disheveled at the same time. Come to think of it, his face was flushed the shade of his usual pink tie. The last 3 days without sleep also hollowed out dark circles under his eyes. His shirt collar began to feel more and more constricting as time went on no matter how much he tugged on it. 

Maybe he really was scared. 

He didn't doubt that he loved Mitty. In fact, he wanted to be with him more than anyone. A case of cold feet wouldn't change that. It was himself he was wrestling with here. 

Spirits, monsters, and deadly espers. He'd faced them all and came out on top. But they were nothing compared to these looming expectations to be a person to rely on. This wasn't something he could bullshit his way through. This was marriage. Mitty was going to see the warted underbelly of when he was Reigen the man instead of Reigen the psychic. His fiancé was going to experience sides of him he only revealed when he was alone. Would he still like him even then?

Reigen was good at a lot of things but this had to be the one that counted most. Could he really be a good partner forever? 

Was he really going to cut it as a husband? 

"Hey, Serizawa?" Reigen asked, not looking at him. 

The man's shoulders lurched at his name suddenly being called. He straightened his back. "Oh! Yes sir?"

"Do you think we'll be good together?" 

Silence sat heavily for a moment. Every second felt longer than the last. 

His friend seemed taken aback by the question but nonetheless looked at the ceiling as though collecting the right words to answer. "Well…"

Another moment passed and Reigen waited with his hands clasped and breath baited. 

"I've never been with anyone so I can't say for certain what a good relationship is but," A compassionate smile spread across the esper's face before he continued, visibly more sure of his words. "I think you and Mr. Mitty understand each other. You always seem to know what the other is thinking. You motivate each other to be better and you seem happy when you're together. And...and you trust each other too. And I think that's whats important." 

Reigen looked at the velveted floor. "Then…"  

"You've become more honest by being with him and he talks like you're really important to him. So please...get married if it makes you both happy! I think you can really be something!" His friend was beaming with 

what Reigen could only say was genuine assurance. 

"I really believe you'll take care of each other." 

His co-worker actually really was resourceful. Maybe someday he ought to pay him more. The uncomfortable feelings waned slightly and his shoulders slowly slacked. Mitty was waiting for him so now wasn't the time to lose it. 

After a few seconds of letting his feelings iron themselves out, he stood and smoothed his hands over his suit jacket. "Well alright then. If thats what you think then I guess there's no backing out of this one." 

Serizawa pressed his hands together in delight. "YES! I've got your back, Reigen!" 

The door into the hallway opened and a set of black eyes peered into the room. "Master, It's starting. Are you coming?" 

The jarring announcement had him scrambling to fix the piece of hair he'd been fussing with. 

"OF COURSE." He jabbed his thumb into his own chest to feign total confidence. "Right behind you, Mob!" 

He held his breath. Alright, let's do this. 

Mitty POV

Teal eyes darted around the room carefully. 

"Hey...Dimple? You there?"

The whizzing of the spirit materializing buzzed next to his ear. 

"Yeah whaddya want? You're on soon, aren't you?" 

Mitty jabbed his right hook into the air where the voice was coming from. "AGH WHAT THE HELL?"

A swift flash of green dodged his reach. 

"HEY, why are you hitting me?! You asked for ME, remember?" The ghost clucked his tongue in disapproval and floated a few inches away for safety. 

"WELL MATERIALIZE WHERE I CAN SEE YOU, YOU BIG BOOGER! I'm on edge!" 

"On edge? What for? You're the one who wanted this, right?"

"W..well….yeah, sorry." He looked at his clenched fist and opened it. "...sorry." He said again more thoughtfully this time. 

Dimple raised a spectral eyebrow. "Whats wrong? Having second thoughts? I mean it's Reigen so who can blame ya."

Mitty scowled while straightening his tie in the mirror. "Hey! REIGEN'S…." His voice softened closer to a whisper. "A pretty good guy. Get off my case. Aren't you supposed to be my support? You're being kinda harsh!" 

"Well kid, something is obviously on your mind so let's hear it. Wedding starts soon right? Yeesh. Once you do all this he's your problem forever." 

"I'm not worried about him!! I'm more worried about...me."

"About you? What're you talkin' about?! You're too good for him!"

"Thanks for the flattery. You still can't have my body though."

"Well I didn't want it anyways, ya bastard. You're weak compared to Shigeo. I'm just being honest here!" 

Silence.

"So? Out with it, What did you want anyways? You're talking nonsense here!" 

Mitty wrinkled his nose in discomfort.  "I just needed to ask something. But you can't run your mouth off like you always do, you old gossip. You're like a knitting circle."

"TCH. like I'd blabber your business to someone. It's all so boring."

"Yeah, yeah just listen, alright?!"

Another few seconds passed. "So? Say it. We don't have all day, you know."

He was looking at his hands again like he was somewhere far off. "Well. D...D'you think I'll be good at this?" 

"Good at what, exactly?" 

"Being married." 

Dimple's form rippled with thought. "You're seriously worried about that?"

Mitty was going to make a sharp remark but his head dropped and his face buried into his knuckles. "Yeah."

Dimple deflated slightly in exasperated defeat. Humans could be so ignorant. 

"Listen. That fraud never shuts up about you. You think you're not good enough? You should hear him talk. It's annoying how you both don't realize things."

"Realize things?"

He sighed and shrugged his tiny arms. "I hear everything whether you like it or not. You two idiots never stop talking and moaning about the other is too good for the other. It's getting old, really." 

"HUH? He says that? No way! But he's always beaten me at everything! I always thought he was way out of my league." 

 "Kinda the opposite actually but...sure. What I'm saying is…! You're both seeing the best parts of each other. Keep doing that and it'll be smooth sailing."

"Yeah but...what if he stops seeing the best in me?'

"You planning on making things hard?" 

"Not really. I just know I can be difficult to deal with." 

"So is he. You really think you got this far because Reigen's all roses and sunshine? 'Course not. You've seen all the stuff he does and you still like him, right?" 

He certainly was flawed, that was for sure. Mitty spent most of Reigen's antics with his eyes rolled up in his head but that didn't mean he wasn't enjoying the moment either. 

"Right."

"Then it's the same for him. Sure it won't always be fun but that phoney won't give up on you just because you're annoying. He's way too persistent. It kind of ticks me off." 

I'm annoying???  That stung but he shook it off.

Reigen was going to have to deal with him for the rest of his life once they said the right words. But if Dimple was right...would it be so bad to annoy each other for the rest of their lives if the other was willing to put up with it? 

Reigen seemed okay with it so far. Mitty would just have to listen to him make a fuss about his coffee table clutter until he died. But really, he wouldn't have that any other way. His voice was kind of cute when he hit that inhuman octave he had when he was in disbelief. 

The door from the hall swung open and a blond clad in what was perhaps the most blinding and loud suit he had ever seen poked his head in. 

"Oh, You're still in here? It's bad luck to be late on your wedding day! Master Reigen is waiting. " He cocked his head to the side. "Or did you need some help with your suit? Its looking a little plain." 

Hanazawa. This kid would try to accessorize his suit in the worst way possible. He put up his hands to wave him off. 

"N-nah, kiddo that's alright. I'll be right there."

Hanazawa, after a few more attempts to get Mitty to let him help retreated back into the hallway. When it was quiet again he eyed Dimple. He was abrasive and unpleasant. He always had a motive for everything and rarely had something nice to say. 

But he came through when it mattered. 

"Hey Dimple?" 

"Yeah? What is it?" 

"Thanks." 

Dimple wouldn't meet his eyes and levitated towards the hall. He didn't want to acknowledge he was helping, he supposed. It was in character for that tsundere blob.

"You ought to get out of here now if you wanna make it on time." 

He stood and dusted himself off. 

"Welp. Here goes everything."

[rjshepherd]

Karl fics master post

Karl fics i have in the works. ill post links here and individually as i finish them . here is my ao3 account you can also find my searching for Ship-vigilante or RJShepherd

Edit.

It's a long post and scrolling is annoying so Im putting stuff under a readmore for now

Au fics

Main au-

spencer swap- a continuation of my spencer swap au with one of my ocs, Shepherd. I jump around a lot and have fics set in every game from re1 to re8 on the go as wips. Don't hold your breath for this one but you can read the first few chapters here.

Some sort of shitpost fic-

my friends and i have been making hella jokes about the lords. Idk if i'll post this one but it's still in my wips bin.

Chrysalis- inspired by my crystal post

This is just me bringing karl and the other lords back. Pure self serving indulgence right here and i'm not even REMOTELY sorry. Will probably feature shepherd at some point because I like to live vicariously through her. tw possible character death

Alcina sfw/nsfw alphabet/ daniel fabron sfw/nsfw alphabet

self explanatory, character stuff set in my au with alcina and daniel, similar to the karl one.

Karl specific fics- sfw

Titles are placeholders for now, might change when I post them.

Rescue- inspired by this ask

Reader is wandering around the village , lost, hungry, scared and alone. Karl finds them and fluffy softness ensues.

Rain- inspired by this ask

Hurt / comfort . The reader wakes up one day during a terrible storm in the village to find Karl missing. They venture out to find him.

Feral

Somewhat like rain but with more blood and gore. Karl is hurt protecting the reader from miranda.

Snow

Fluff. It's cold as balls outside and Karl doesn't want the reader to go.

Red riding hood

Reverse scenario of feral. Reader is injured protecting Karl from either the bsaa, ethan or the lycans. Karl spends most of the time beating himself up over it, panicking because he doesn't know shit about first aid. I want some soft karl in my life.

Collared- verging on nsfw but no sexual content. inspired by this ask

Reader gives karl his first collar. He’s not quite sure how to react.

Long night- inspired by these asks 1 2

Karl has been angrier than usual. He’s having a hard time coping since leaving the village. All the medicine and mold treatments have him stressed and he’s taking it out on the reader. Sickfic, tw for mentions of trauma

Karl specific fics- nsfw

Unless otherwise stated i'll do an afab and amab version of the reader. I can also do alt versions/ change pronouns/ readers genitals etc upon request.

Scars- inspired by this ask

tw for gore, self harm, injury. solo karl. Karl survives having his throat slit by alcina, self pitying and dark thoughts abound.

Mating season

Karl x lycans. If yall have read licker bait, lycanthrope or my kinktober fic collection then you know what you're in for. Monster fucking, breeding kink and whatever else i feel like throwing in there.

Punishment - tw noncon

Miranda finds out about karls plans. She comes up with a creative punishment involving the cadou. Breeding kink and teratophilia.

Good boy

Nsfw version or continuation of Collared. I just wanna write about some reader doing pet play with karl.

Scent- inspired by part 1 of this ask ftm reader/pegging

Karl keeps his heats a secret , tries his best to use the lycans to deal with it. One day, things get out of hand. The reader will have to show him how to look after himself .

Tension- inspired by part 2 of this ask ftm reader/pegging

Karl is being a grumpy shit during his heat. Reader has had enough and decides to put him in his place hint: it's under them.

Alpha- inspired by part 3 of this ask FTM reader/pegging

Karl wakes up in the worst heat of his life. He can't do anything but cry out for you, his alpha, to sort him out.

Rut- inspired by this ask

Karl goes into a rare rut. Reader isn't willing to give in to his demands so easily.

i think thats everything im working on or planning for the future. if you want to know more about anything feel free to send me an ask