#i'm gonna just say this event happened with a couple of sentences and move on

[mintsilhouette]

me: It would be great to once, just once, write a normal-sized chapter that is not TOTALLY unhinged in terms of length 

the chapter in question: 11,000 WORDS SO FAR AND WE’RE NOT EVEN DONE YET, BABY

me: 

[corrodedcoffins-blog]

History Repeats Itself

masterlist

note: first jess one-shot!!! (and i'm actually proud of it???) also i say their baby is one but i don't know babies to well so if she's too advanced for a one year old, just cut me some slack

warnings: teen pregnancy, food/eating

word count: 4.7 k

♡ summary: Being a teen mom is hard but without any help it's even harder, after saving up enough she can finally move to Stars Hollow to be closer to her baby's father

♡ Jess Mariano x reader

request ✓

The bus ride down was long, and it only got worse as 1-year-old Caroline woke up from her nap and decided to let everyone know of the inconvenience. Finally after the long months of working and saving up she had enough to move to Stars Hollow, unlike Jess who had a parent to send them and an uncle to stay with, she saved up and made it happen. She wanted Caroline to be around her father, and she wanted to be close to Jess.

And Y/n’s always loved the idea of a small town, a place where you felt safe, a place she would feel safe raising her child in, a place that wasn’t $2,500 a month for a closet. Here she could give her daughter a lot more, here she would have a support system in Jess and Luke. Unlike what her parents would give her.

By this point in the bus route it was only the mother and daughter and a couple strays, she saw the messy haired boy sitting on a park bench close to the bus stop, of course he had his nose in a book. She started packing up Caroline’s stuff, tucking her blanket and toys in the basket of the stroller.

When she got to the bus doors, Jess quickly made his way to help her lift the stroller down the steps, when the stroller was once again on the ground Jess squats down getting face to face with his little girl, “Hey, Care!” “Daddy!” He lifted her up by her armpits. When the little girl was out of her seat and in her dad’s arms, her mom stacked their bags on the seat.

“Hi! You’re so big! Really she is. She’s growing up so fast.” “Well she can walk way more stable now. No more scaring, mommy that you’ll fall if I look away for a second.” She says the last sentence in baby voice while she tickles the girl’s belly to make her giggle and their foreheads to rest on each other’s.  

“So you gonna show us around?!” “‘Around’?” They continued their walk around the gazebo area, walking towards Luke’s. 

“This is it, that's the record shop, that’s the bookstore, that's Luke’s, and that’s all you need to know.” “Well where’s the bank, I might need to rob it later.” “You’ll find a job. And if you don’t then work at Luke’s, he could do with the time off then maybe he’d get off everyone’s backs.” “He’s probably stressed with you always causing trouble.” “Me? Trouble? Nooo, I’m a peach.”

-

Jess had the baby today since Y/n was off to find a job, her first stop was the most promising. Luke let her know that a friend of his needed extra staff at their Inn for an event that was coming up, someone who could be an assistant of sorts. So after wearing her most capable looking top, and best fitting jeans. She kissed Caroline’s check and yelled goodbye to Luke and Jess as she began her walk.

When she walked inside she saw a man at the front desk on the phone. Waiting to ask for directions, she hung around the man’s desk, busying herself with some pamphlet. She couldn't help but listen to the man’s angry English in his french accent.

Suddenly he hung up the phone and got back to writing whatever he was writing, without looking up and with an annoyed tone said, “Yes?” “I was looking for Lorelei, I’m here for-” “The assistant job, yes.. Follow me.” He walked quickly to wherever it was they were going, mumbling along the way, “Of course, an assistant. Just what we need around here. Not like I don’t already do most of the work around here.”

He opened the door for them, it ended up being the kitchen they were now in. A tall woman holding a to-go coffee cup that said ‘Luke’s’ on it and a shorter woman in an apron fighting with a scruffy man about vegetables, which look to be parsnips. 

“The mini-you is here.” “One little comment, Micheal. I’m not saying you’re incapable. I just want more help with organising events so I focus on planning!” “Whatever.” Turning on his heels, Micheal walked out the doors making his way back to his desk. 

“So you’ve met Micheal! Sorry, we usually don’t let him around the new people but we're a little short-staffed. Let’s head to the dining room.”

They sat down at a table in the dining room, Lorelei asked all the important questions, and Y/n was perfect, now she was just asking the things she’ll tell Sookie later when the woman asks about the new hire.

Taking a sip of her sixth coffee this morning Lorelei asked, “So, are you new to town? I haven’t seen you around before.” The girl was stirring milk into her second coffee as she responded, “Yeah, I am. I just moved here with my um- my daughter, closer to her dad so…” 

Since it was of course the time most adults got horrified, thought she was a bad kid, and though she didn’t get that vibe from Lorelei, it was at least bound to shock her. “You’re daughter? How old are you? Wait- I know, it’s on your resume. I mean- I’m, deja vu y’know? Abba did say ‘the history books on the shelf are always repeating themselves’.” 

She must have seen the confused look on the young girl and explained, “I had my daughter when I was sixteen.. And came here to get a job, so just getting major deja vu. Well then, since I know what you’re going through, I won’t put you through the short mental torture of waiting for a call I was gonna do and just tell you you got the job.” “Oh, thank you! I really need this, I can’t thank you enough.” “Just change her name to Lorelei and we’ll call it even.” “deal.” Those two would get along great, much to Luke’s misfortune.

-

Y/n sat at the counter with Caroline in front of her sitting on the counter while she played with her mother’s hair. Jess was filling up cups of coffee and serving customers while he listened to Y/n’s words.

“So until you go back to school, you’ll have Caroline during the day here and when I’m done work I’ll take her.” “No, you’ll never have a break. After work you go to your house, relax then grab her after dinner.” 

Jess may have this ‘I only care about myself’ attitude but that never included Caroline and Y/n, he’d kill for either of them at any given moment. He always put them first. If thought Y/n needed a break, she was getting a break whether she wanted it or not. 

Just as the girl was going to thank him she was interrupted by another girl around their age coming to sit down at the counter, two over from her. 

“I have the book you lent me.” She said, unknowingly interrupting the conversation since Jess was facing the coffee machine to make a new batch when she sat down. “Oh, thanks.” He muttered, notably not turning to face her.

On the inside Jess felt guilty. Why did he feel guilty? He didn’t do anything, he and Y/n weren’t together, nevermind the fact that all he did was lend Rory a book. As friends. Because they’re friends. But nonetheless it almost felt like cheating. Jess and Y/n may not be together officially but that didn’t mean that they both didn’t love each other. And not just because they were the parents to a beautiful little girl. Jess had always wanted more, he’d let the girl know that more than a handful of times, and she let him know it wasn’t unrequited, yet something always came between them.

You’d think having a baby together would bring them closer, and in some ways it did; they trusted each other more. But they also fought more and being the dumb teenagers they were, they didn’t have the emotional ability to move past that and build the relationship they both wanted. And then when they felt they were ready to, Jess was sent to live with his uncle. Just another fork in the road. But now they were living in the same town and had a good system, and people to support them. It was the perfect time, everything was going right, they could feel all the feelings that never really left resurfacing.

“Okay, I have to get to work. You’ve got her?” “Yeah.” “Bye, baby, I love you. I’ll see you in a little bit, but you get to spend all day with daddy.” “Bye-bye, mommy!” 

She said bye to Jess after she walked around the counter and handed him Caroline, muttering a small ‘go see, daddy’ that Rory most definitely heard.

When the door finally chimed shut Rory shot up to follow Jess to the table he was now setting Caroline up at. She watched his gentle movements as he readjusts her shirt and places crayons and paper in front of her, which she got right into scriballing away. 

“She’s yours?” “Yeah.” “.. So that girl is your girlfri-" "I’ve got work to do.” 

-

The warm atmosphere of the dinner is a stark contrast to the cold winter air. Noticing Jess and Caroline are nowhere to be seen she assumes they were upstairs and makes her way up the stairs. Half-way up the flight of stairs she could hear her little girl’s loud giggles. She quietly opens the door to see Jess holding Caroline above his head, as if she was flying.

When she first got pregnant everyone told her Jess wouldn’t be a good dad, that she can’t rely on him for anything. God were they wrong. She doesn’t think it’s possible for her baby to have a better person as a dad. She sadly doesn’t get to watch the scene for much longer as she’s spotted by little Caroline.

“Mommy! I see daddy ‘morrow?” “Yes, you get to be with daddy all day tomorrow too.” “Yay!”

As the conversation between them goes on, Jess lets his little girl plant her feet back on the ground and starts collecting some things she’ll need during the night before she comes back here tomorrow, he then starts getting Caroline’s shoes on her feet. While Y/n sits on the couch next to their little girl.

“So who was that girl this morning?” “Who?” 

Jess always did this, it was a tell tale sign that he didn’t want to talk about it, but that’s never stopped Y/n before. “You know who.” Of course having to be difficult, Jess gives her a fake confused look, as if he’s never met another girl in his life. 

“The one returning your book.” “Oh, that girl.” “Yeah, that girl.” “She’s nobody.” “So you just lend books to ‘nobody’s now?” “Care, where’s Mr.Wiggle?” The girl lets out a gasp and reaches out for Jess to help her off the couch, when he does she runs into the closet where she previously hid while playing hide and seek a couple hours earlier. 

“What? Don’t want Care to hear about her new step-mom?” “Don’t call her that.” “What? Care? Only you can call her that?” “No, don’t call Rory Care’s ‘step-mom’.” “Rory! I get her name!” 

Jess was a quiet guy, but not this quiet, especially not with Y/n. He didn’t want to talk about Rory, maybe because it was weird talking about another girl with your baby momma. And yes it was weird for Y/n too, but for a completely different reason, she assumes. She liked Jess, and has since before she even knew about Caroline.

“C’mon, Jess, it’s me. I want you to be happy.” Sure Rory made him happy, but only because she was the only friend he had here, it wasn’t the way Y/n made him happy. Before he could deny for words again Caroline came back running into the room with her stuffie in her hands. Having already said her goodbyes, she opened the door and walked out.

“Caroline, wait hun! I think you should go for it Jess.”

She walked out the door, closing it behind her, leaving Jess to stare at where she disappeared. He decided to take her advice, just maybe not the way she meant it

-

Y/n helped Caroline pack more snow onto their snowman. Caroline wanted to do it after she heard Luke complaining about town events again, he stopped complaining when he saw how excited the girl was. They had Mr.Wiggles off the side learning against the tree, using him as a reference. 

“Mommy, no. Mr.Wiggles has more hair.” 

Caroline was getting very comfortable ordering her mother around, but in this instance Y/n let it slide, poking more sticks on the top of the snowman’s head to mimic Mr.Wiggle’s spiky hair. 

“That’s good!”

Lorelei and Rory were just one snowman down, both told Caroline they thought she would win and encouraged her before she even started. Since they were so close, they could hear the scene that had just played out. 

“Tough age, wait till you get to the terrible twos. ‘No’ is all you’ll hear.” Lorelei said, kindly as her and her own daughter walked past them. Y/n let out a laugh at the comment before she asks, “You guys done already?” “No, but after Michelangelo over there busted out the power buffer, and when Caroline busts out her cuteness, what chance do we have?” “I see your point.” “So off to Luke’s we go.” “We’ll see you there in a bit.”

-

Y/n was standing talking to one of the decorators when she saw Lorelei and Sookie step out of the kitchen, quickly finishing her directions she wrote down a note on her clipboard then made her way to meet them at the entrance of the dining room.

When Sookie sees her, she asks, “What’re we looking at today?” Sookie was really fun to work with, like Lorelei she was very chill as a boss, but Sookie was also so kind and always took it upon herself to make sure Y/n has eaten and that her and Caroline are taken care of. She could tell the woman was going to make an amazing mother.

“This is last on the list.” She replied, after she took a quick glance at her clipboard, then continued, “We’ve got trumpets, the madrigal singers-” “Sorry to interrupt, but I’m not playing squire of Bracebridge.” 

Sookie and Lorelei must have finally told Jackson to play the squire, they told her earlier in the week that they were playing to ask at the last moments so he had to. It was a flawless plan, especially when Jackson can’t say no to Sookie.

She saw that Lorelei and Sookie were just ignoring him, so she played along and continued down her list, “All the servers are lined up. This is just for the recorder players and harpists.” She stopped at the recorder players and let Lorelei talk to them, “Hi. Lay some on us, guys.” 

The two recorder players played the soft tube they were going to come accustomed to in the next few days. The three of them shared positive looks and when their playing came to an end, Sookie said, “Hey, you cats really know how to blow those things.” Lorelei continued Sookie’s comment by saying, “You’ve got the gig. Y/n here will call you later with the details. Thanks.” 

Recorder players started packing their things, Jackson started again on the fact that he wouldn’t play the squire, and the three women continued to ignore him.

“When do the quests arrive?” “Thursday at four on their own jet.” “After buying out the whole inn.”

“Must be nice to have money.” Y/n added, checking off and writing down more notes on her clipboard.

“You know what struck me today?” “-Was it the fact that I am not the squire?-""We’re crazy for doing this.” “We’re beyond crazy.” It did feel crazy, Lorelei told her they’d never done a function this big before and that’s the reason they hired more help. Like her, but also that they were planning to do a lot more big things like this, more weddings, and such. 

“We’re ‘Anne Heche speaking her secret language to god and looking for the spaceship in Fresno’ kinda crazy.” “Oquinis no-goodo noto.” Sookie said, causing Y/n add, “Il ecnatra dos guidan.”

Their nonsense was once again interrupted by Jackson, “And spring this on me at the last minute too. I mean, that’s just manipulative.” Suddenly a cook pops his head out of the kitchen, saying calmly, “Sookie- fire!”

Sookie rolled her eyes softly, this happened far too often, before saying, “I gotta get back in the kitchen. You guys handle the harps?” Both women nodded and replied in unison, “You got it.” 

“Alright. I’ll do it. I’ll play squire Bracebridge if that’s what you want.” Everyone knew he would cave eventually. Sookie patted his arm and said a quick, “Thanks, sweetie.” before walking back into the kitchen to hopefully deal with the fire. “As long as it’s not just because I fit the costume.” Jackson looked back at Lorelei and Y/n, Lorelei had a grin on her face while Y/n wore a tight-lipped smile. “It’s because I fit the costume, isn’t it?” He followed after Sookie.

Lorelei put her arm around Y/n and led them to the harpist, “Go ahead.” The harpist played the same tune as the two recorder players. But just as the woman started, Lorelei got a call. She patted Y/n’s arm, “I have to take this, you handle the harpist.”

The girl tried to stay calm, nodding her head and going back to listening to the music. Lorelei trusted her, yes it wasn’t a big job by any means, but still it was a step into a bigger role down the line.

-

The next day, Sookie and Y/n had all the waiters/performers in the dining room going over what their job was. And teaching them the old English words to use for things.

Sookie was just telling Rune that he couldn’t just talk like an old man whe Lorelei came in with a disappointed look on her face, and let them know the dinner was off.

The three women, as well as Rory and Caroline were now sitting at a table at Luke’s, Caroline was happily eating her pancakes, plain just as she liked and completely unaware of the collective disappointment of the group.

Lorelei has really welcomed Y/n into her life. She may not be Jess’s biggest fan, but she would always help another teen mom out. Especially since she sees so much of herself in Y/n. She’s grown to really love the girl in the short time they’ve known each other. And aftering hearing Y/n didn’t have her family in her life she was more than happy to help and maybe become that family for her one day. Just like Mia did for her.

“I’ve got 30 pounds of aged beef, trays and trays of trout, mountains of prune tarts. I diced pumpkins until my hands turned orange. I’ve got pumpkin hands!” Sookie showed the table her hands, it apparently caught Caroline’s attention since she grabbed Sookie’s right hand and held it in her left while she continued eating. Sookie lets her hand rest in the little girl’s while she freaks out more and asks Lorelei, “How can you stay so calm?” “There’s nothing we can do about it.” 

Rory was just as upset, mostly because she knew how hard her mother worked on the planning, “I can’t believe they got snowed in.” Y/n hasn’t told Jess, but she’s become pretty close to Rory, the girl sometimes comes to the Inn and helps around and Rory’s become kinda her only friend, that was until Rory invited her to the record store with Lane. After that day she had two friends. 

After knowing Rory more, she realised how much she and Jess have in common, and even though Rory has a boyfriend she can tell there’s an attraction to Jess she’s trying so hard to hide. 

Y/n zoned out for a moment, looking outside, she was upset that the first event she helped organise wouldn’t even happen. She was broken from her stare out the window from Caroline jumping in place while sitting on her mom’s lap, the cause of which was Luke coming to the table. 

“You girls want anything besides coffee?” He asked, adding on with a pat on the girl’s head, “Or pancakes?” “Hey, what about Luke?” “What about him?” “He eats, and Jess eats. Doesn’t Jess eat?” Sookie directs the question at Y/n, before the girl could say anything Luke cuts her off, “What’s she doing?” “I think she’s inviting you for dinner.”

Getting distracted while trying to convince Luke to come to dinner, the four decide to still put on the dinner for the town. Like an out of control slumber-party.

-

The dinner was going great, the secret amazing part of inviting the town was that Y/n and Caroline could actually meet everyone. Miss. Patty and Babette loved Y/n and Caroline (mostly Caroline), Caroline loved Kirk, and everyone loved that Caroline could do whatever she wanted and Talor wouldn’t say anything. And Y/n got to meet Paris after all the stories she’s heard.

Caroline and Y/n were in line for the horse drawn carriage rides, when Caroline saw her favourite person, Lane. “Laney! I ride with you!” Lane, before agreeing, made eye contact with Y/n to make sure it was okay. Y/n gave them the go ahead and helped Caroline get settled. After their carriage left she made her way to the next one. Telling the driver it’s just her.

It was nice to get a break from everything. It was quiet and peaceful. Well that was until Jess ran up and hopped on the carriage next to her. Without a word he put the blanket that was over the girl’s legs on his too. 

“I thought you and Care were going together.” “She’s one ahead, with Lane.” “Ahhh. Well it’s two to a sleigh no more, no less. So you were breaking the rules, you're welcome for saving you.” “You could have hurt yourself.” “Aw, you care about me.” “You are my baby's father.” 

She wished she just agreed with him. She didn’t just care for him because he was Caroline’s dad, and she doesn’t think she says it enough. But then again, maybe it would mess things up if she admitted that. But that decision was made for her.

“I’m touched.” “Jess. I don’t mean it like that. I care about you, Caroline or not.” 

Trying to change the topic to something she thought was more lighthearted, she says, “So, how are things with Rory?” “There are no things with Rory.” “C’mon, Jess, we can talk about this stuff-” “Why are you so insistent that I date Rory?” 

She wasn’t expecting that outburst. Not from Jess. He rarely ever yelled at her, and when he did it was always misplaced anger, never actually angry at her. This time it was her, it was what she said.

“I just want you to be happy-” “C’mon, Y/n. Be serious.” “I am. I want-” “If you want me to be happy so bad, why won’t you give me a chance?!” 

He turned his face to her, looking right into her eyes, she could see the hurt in his. Did she put it there?

“What’re you-” “Since we found out about Caroline, I’ve tried and tried to help you realise that I love you. And not how you mean ‘I love you’. I don’t love and care for you because we have a family and I have to. I love you, because I want to. I want to be with you. And I know it will be hard, but I’ll do the work.” 

If she had more social awareness at the pent she would have hated that the coachman heard all of that. But after what Jess said, the look in his eyes; that was so full of love. She felt like it was just them two in the world. No, that it was just their little family in the whole world. He and Caroline were all she would ever need.

“I love you too, Jess. I have for so long, long before Caroline, but I thought you wouldn’t want to be tied down to me, especially after I had Caroline, that any sign I thought you gave me was all in my head.” “It’s not.” 

He brought her in closer to him, an arm around her shoulders and when her arms wrapped around his waist he left a kiss on the crown of her head. The small kiss brought her eyes up to him, which led to their first real kiss in one year and nine months. 

His lips were softer than she remembered, but they still fit into hers as if they never left.

She broke away from their reuniting kiss to place her head in the crook of his neck, wanting nothing more than to be close to him.

“My mom didn’t want me to come home.” She took her head out of his neck to look at him fully. They were always that person for each other, the one you can tell your problem to and they knew when to help and when listening was enough. Right now, she knew listening was enough.

“I’m sorry, Jess.” “It’s fine. Just sucks.” “I know. Well, Care and I will always want you to come home.” After her words, he brought her closer than before. She was always just what he needed. 

Wanting to change the subject, Jess nodded his head to the snowman Y/n and Caroline built. “It’s good.” “What?” “Your snowman, well Caroline’s snowman I'm sure she’d want me to say.” “You know which one’s ours?” “Definitely shows her personality… It kinda looks like Mr.Wiggles.” “That’s what we were going for. But everyone thinks the one on the end is going to win.” “Really? It’s so overdone.” “I agree.” “You and Care’s should win.” “Agree again.”

-

The dinner was filled with Jess and Luke confused at what exactly was in the food, Jess and Y/n trying their best to keep Caroline sat which about half an hour in they gave up and just let her walk around the lobby, as well as saying hello and talking to everyone at the table. Having an interesting conversation with Mrs.Kim about grace, ‘helping’ Kirk by sitting on his rolling food cart, and even talking with Paris for a while. 

Overall it was a great night. Even better when Jess, Y/n, and Caroline got to their shared room, putting Caroline asleep together for the first time in a while. And falling to sleep in the same bed together, holding each other, listening to each other’s breaths, as well as Caroline’s. Everything was just how they both always secretly wanted. And now get to have openly and freely. 

- 

In the morning Y/n got up early since she was technically working, and she still was when Luke, Jess, and Caroline left to open the diner for the day. It was around noon when Y/n finally left, walking to Luke’s to spend the day with her two favourite people. Which was when she saw Michelangelo’s snowman fallen to a large pile of snow on the ground.

She didn’t even have to think for a second to know that Jess did it. Sometimes he did the weirdest things to show his love.

The bell rang as she pushed open the door, she sat down next to Caroline, saying ‘good morning’ and getting one back before she made her way to the counter.

“I saw what you did.” “What’d I do?” “Caroline will be happy she won.” “Anything if my girl’s win.”

[imvenusasaboy]

PUPARIA

Chapter 15 - Simulation Swarm

prev - chapter 1

The detective wasn't the first Hosah Levi, and he definitely wouldn't be the last. The original, the blueprint, everything the shifter was supposed to be, that was his uncle.

Hosah's dad was heartbroken when he lost his twin brother. That was the Hosah Levi. There wasn't much to explain his disappearance. No body, no camera footage. Just gone without a trace. Safe to say, it was a closed casket funeral.

A sad, but common occurrence for shifters. You shrink in the wrong place at the wrong time, you're gonna end up trampled on, kidnapped, washed away by the rain, or all of the above all at the same time.  That was why Hosah's dad was so hesitant to let him take the job offer in New York. It was silly. His son was a grown man, he had his own place in Colorado with a steady job and a couple classes to go to in his off time, so why should he have to worry about being allowed to take opportunities?

The truth was, his father had always thought of him as incapable. Not in an insulting way, but in an infantilising, coddling way, which was arguably far worse.

Whenever they spoke on the phone, their conversations always ended sour with an argument, about how Hosah should quit and come home, about how he should call more because every day that passes by without absolute confirmation of his safety causes immense stress to his entire family, or just about anything they can think of on that particular day.

Today however, the argument was about coming home, as it usually was.

"It's just not safe out there. You know how long it's been since you last called? Three days. Hosah, you understand how worried I get, don't you? You know how much can happen in three days. It'd be so much easier for you to just come back to Colorado. Your room is the same as how you left it. Please." His father pleaded down the phone.

It was always the same two or three points with him. You're not like everyone else, you're a vulnerable person, you can't get around your own apartment on your own so how are you supposed to navigate the city, I'm scared for you, blah, blah, blah. Quite frankly, Hosah was bored of it. He'd admitted to himself that he wasn't going to be able to hack complete independence for much longer, but he'd never, ever, admit that fact to his dad.

With his phone balancing between the side of his head and his shoulder, the shifter tried his best to stay on the call as he painted away in the short time that Teddy would be out for,

"No- no I know there are risks," Hosah repeated words he'd said a thousand times before, "That's why I'm not.. living alone anymore."

He still hadn't told his dad about Teddy. In fact, he hadn't told his dad about anything that had been happening lately. He rarely did, actually, Joel Levi didn't need the added stress.

"You have a girlfriend?" That was another thing Hosah hadn't told his dad about. Or really, hadn't told anyone about. Asides from Jules, as she knew everything.

He debated his relationship status with Teddy before responding, "No, but I have a roommate. New co-worker. He's nice. I like him."

"A co-worker is who killed your uncle, you know." Father dearest reminded him. It was never actually proven whose blood the small red stain on the office floor belonged to, but Joel had his theories.

It was best to not bring up the uncertainty of the true events of his Uncle's death around his father. After all, they were twins. Connected at the soul, or something like that.

"Right," Hosah mumbled instead of arguing, a route he rarely went down now that he thought about it.

The other end of the line crackled before the voice was picked back up again, "-this guy that you've moved in with?"

The shifter could only assume the first word in that sentence was supposed to be 'who'. Putting Teddy into words was a difficult task, at least, if he didn't want to end up gushing like a school girl when talking about her latest hallway crush, that is.

"His name's Edward. Super tall, like, the top of his head brushes against door frames kind of tall. Italian. Red hair, met him like a month and a half ago." Hosah described, his lips instinctively curling into an embarrassingly wide smile as he spoke.

"And this guy," Joel began, static and all, "He's good? He helps you? He's nice, gentle, sweet, caring, all that?"

The shifters face flushed a slight red as his father listed off all of Teddy's best qualities, "Yeah, yeah of course." He clarified.

"I could probably do a better job." His father scoffed as he usually did. Nothing was ever good enough, whether it was washing the dishes or taking care of his son, he might as well just be doing it the whole time all by himself because nobody else could do it as good as him.

"Yeah," Almost on queue, the sound of keys rattling on the other side of the door cut Hosah and his father's conversation short, " I have to go, 'kay? Got stuff to do. Call me some time tomorrow or whenever you can and I'll pick up. Okay, loveyoubye"

The shifter rushed to end the phone call so he could firstly, cover up Teddy's birthday gift, and also greet him as he came through the door.

"Sorry, did I interrupt something?" Teddy asked from across the room, standing in the open door. Yeah. His head just about would've brush against the wooden framing.

How someone could look so effortlessly picturesque, Hosah would never know. The shifter stared for a moment, completely lost for words, just taking in the rather mundane sight in front of him. Teddy's pale face had been nipped by the cold breeze, it seemed, as his cheeks and nose were reddened, although a more pink colour than his scruffy, brownish red hair that had clearly been rattled by the same wind. He looked a little disheveled with his scarf lazily wrapped loosely around his neck and his coat missing a few buttons from being completely fastened. Still, even in clothes he'd thrown on in about half a minute, Teddy looked perfect.

Hosah had almost forgotten what his roommate had even said in the first place as he opened his mouth to respond, "Uh, no, no, I was just on the phone to my dad, actually."

"Cool." Teddy had gotten into the habit of stealing the shifter's favourite words and phrases, "Have you told him yet?"

Right. It was probably best to keep his family in the dark about his current situation, he didn't want to worry them, or, god forbid, endanger them.

"Wellll..." Hosah wasn't really sure how to word it in a way that his roommate would understand.

"I mean, you don't have to." The sudden shift in views left the shifter without knowing what to say, half expecting an argument to come out of the conversation. Teddy continued, "It's your business, and if you don't want to, or you're not ready, or.. Whatever reasons you have, you're not obligated to say anything."

"You're right." Hosah nodded.

"As per usual," The taller of the two muttered under his breath as he strolled up to his roommate, giving his blond hair a ruffle before pulling the head into his shoulder, or, more like his chest given their height difference.

It was the little and casual pieces of affection like this that drove Hosah crazy. He felt like a rabid dog with how desperate he'd become to experience the brief touches over and over again.

"Did he say anything?" Teddy asked, hand still cradling the shifter's head, their legs intertwining as they stood at an, in any other case, uncomfortably short distance from each other.

Although, since it was Hosah and Teddy, this kind of close proximity was just right.

Hosah thought for a minute, focused on fidgeting with the loose threads that hung out of his roommates thick, bobbly knitted sweater, "Mmm," He hummed, "Just the usual, come home, it's dangerous out there, you need someone to take care of you,"

"God," Teddy laughed, "If there's one person that doesn't need taking care of in this world, it's you."

Hosah looked up, the overhead light reflecting in the big black holes he had for eyes, "You think?" He asked, chin resting on the taller of the two's chest, as he couldn't quite reach his shoulder as his hips leant against Teddy's.

"Cmon. First time you were.. I don't know, shifted I guess, you made me a cup of coffee. I mean, I know I wouldn't even be able to make it from room to room if I were like that." Teddy hesitated as he got to certain parts of his sentence.

Hosah had never really known how to take compliments.

"Whatever," He scoffed, regrettably worming his way out of Teddy's cradle, turning his back to him as he tried to forget the much needed words of affirmation.

He was right, Hosah wasn't completely incapable, but that's not what he'd been told his entire life, that's not what he truly believed. All Hosah really thought he wanted was to find someone who would take care of him like the helpless creature he was, but even he knew that wasn't completely the true to his deeper feelings. His own heart and mind were things even he would never be able to fully understand. That was Hosah's problem. He'd spent weeks, months, years stuck on a goal, and as soon as he'd meet it, he'd realise he actually wanted the opposite all along. Despite how much it hurt to admit, his stalker was spot on. Hot and cold. If anyone ever saw Hosah sticking to his word without any contradictions, that was not him, and they were to eradicate this imposter as soon as possible.

"You know it's true," Teddy teased, following behind the shifter as he rushed into their now shared bedroom to find a shirt to put on.

A defensive snap he hadn't felt the urge to indulge in came rushing out of his mouth, "Then why do you.. I don't know. If I'm so capable, why do you insist on doing everything for me. You're not my crutch. Clearly I don't need my hand being held."

He regretted the words as soon as he said them, but the deep rooted anger and sadness Hosah held toward this topic got the best of him.

Teddy stood in an astonished silence as he leant in the door frame.

"Because I want to." The tall figure blocking out the hallway's light laughed slightly as he spoke, a laugh that said, 'Isn't it obvious?'.

"I want to take care of you. I want to make things easier if I can. Yeah, you're capable, but that doesn't mean it's not still nice for someone to go out of their way to help you. If I asked you to get me something from the fridge, you'd do it, right? You just... need to let me help you. I won't if you don't want me to, but you need to decide that for yourself." Teddy continued.

Right now, all Hosah wanted to do was to shrink down and sit in the giants hands. 'Yes, of course you can take care of me, you can clip my wings and tell me what to do, and I'd do it without question.' , he thought.

Hosah turned to face the towering figure, "I just.. I don't want you to see me differently, From now, to when I'm small." He explained, his voice much quieter, as if he had something in his throat as he spoke.

"I don't think of you differently." Teddy put it bluntly.

"That's easier said than done." The shifter shrugged as his eyes moved down to the floor as they usually did when he got apprehensive over something.

"Hosah." His tone had shifted, now much more stern, but not necessarily angry, "You're probably the one person in the world I have the most respect and admiration for. I'd be an idiot to think of you any less than I would.. I don't know, some highly intelligent Nobel prize winning scholar dude, doesn't matter if you're five foot or three inches."

"I'm five seven." Hosah corrected, stood with his arms folded and his head hanging low, clearly not having much to substance to carry his arguments anymore. That was the problem with logical people, they solved all your issues far too fast, not giving you the time of day to just be angry about it before finding a solution.

"Five seven, then. Like I said, doesn't matter. I.." Teddy lost his words, he sounded tired, maybe sad, enough to make the shifter feel guilty for the entire discussion.

"I love you, Hosah." Finally, after maybe three long seconds, Teddy spoke again.

What? Seriously? Hosah's brain moved at a hundred miles an hour, surely he couldn't have heard right, there was no way in the world. He tried to say something, but instead, all that came out were stuttering gasps. He could feel his face becoming hotter by the second as his eyes stayed locked onto the carpeted floor, unable to even consider lifting them to look at Teddy's, probably smug, face.

As expected, the figure by the door laughed at Hosah's pathetic attempt at responding,

"What, do your friends not tell you they love you usually?" Teddy smiled, moving in closer towards the shifter, placing a hand about the size of Hosah's entire head on his shoulder.

Of course, how could he be so stupid.

"No, it's just, I thought you meant it differently for a second. Ha-ha." The shifter tried his best to keep his cool, but his furrowed eyebrows and blushing cheeks gave him away.

The pale hand traced up Hosah's neck until it found its way to his face, cupping the burning cheek in its palm, the thumb caressing the smooth, tanned surface, which didn't fail to make it a much deeper red colour. The shifter stood silently, his mouth slightly agape, although still holding his breath with a sharp inhale of surprise at the touch.

"Well," Teddy spoke softly, smiling just enough for his crooked tooth to stick out from his top lip, "Maybe I do, in a way."

That was all he wanted to hear. The words Hosah had prayed would come out of his mouth from the moment he opened it. It all came together, after weeks of debating whether he even had a chance or not, he could finally answer all his questions. But, as a million cases in his head came to a close, around the same amount were opened right back up again, this time with more dead ends and false leads, leaving them to go cold with the lack of any kind of explanation.

"Don't mess with me like that." Hosah's head hung down, his hand barely able to wrap around the wrist of the man cupping his cheek.

Despite how hard his chest beat and how the butterflies fluttered in his stomach, he couldn't help but blink the tears out of his eyes as he feared it was all a big joke. An elaborate plan to make a fool out of himself, living the rest of his time with Teddy in utter shame and embarrassment as the awkwardness of their unreciprocated feelings hung heavily in the air, polluting the apartment until they'd both suffocate in the unresolved, unspoken and unmentioned tension.

"I'm not messing with you. I'm serious." And he really did sound serious.

There was no way, though. No way that someone like Teddy, someone so sweet and so gorgeous, could ever be attracted to Hosah. He wouldn't believe it no matter how many times he heard it. The shifter couldn't help but scoff, his grip tightening around the wrist.

"Hosah," Teddy's other hand grabbed hold of the other side of Hosah's face, lifting his chin with both of his thumbs until the brown eyes met his own, "It's true. Of course it's true. I thought I was being obvious with all the touchiness." He was laughing, but the shifter was still too discombobulated to see the humour in any of it.

"You're so confusing, I don't know what you think." Hosah gave his roommate a playful jab in the stomach, unable to say anything else about the news he'd just been told.

The feeling could only be described at euphoric. The shifter had felt like a monstrous pervert with what he'd been thinking of Teddy. His brain would start to sizzle and fry just at the thought of a time where his forearms were visible as he loomed over the shifter's shrunken form; to Teddy, it was probably nothing, but to him, it was absolutely everything and more. It was always these tiny details that had him the most worked up. Hosah didn't really care about if they were jacked or if they were insanely beautiful, although those were definitely bonuses, but he cared about nice hands, good, thick calves, broad shoulders, all the things that would come in handy.

"You don't get to talk about confusing, you've been giving me mixed signals since day one." Teddy pressed his forehead against the shifter's, the tips of their noses touching as they did, well, however long ago it was. The days had been blurring together lately.

It took much more energy than usual to stay regular sized. "That's just the way I am, I guess," Hosah smiled despite the rush of conflicting thoughts and feelings, as he grappled against his own body to keep the few inches he felt slowly draining from his body.

"You don't have to hold back, it's okay." It was getting quite obvious that the shifter was now standing on the tips of his toes, and Teddy always picked up on everything, even things Hosah would try his best to hide.

And in the blink of an eye, Hosah was back to his usual self. Although it wasn't exactly entirely normalised, the shifter felt the most comfortable when he was about this height. Three inches tall, a slight bit bigger than Teddy's thumb. It was perfect, he could slip and slink under the radar without anyone realising he was even there in the first place. Hosah had become used to being a shadow in the city, everyone is here because they dream big, being exceptional in your home town out in butt-fuck nowhere just didn't cut it here, and the shifter had come to accept that. He accepted it the moment he had to quit baseball because he just couldn't be a regular height for long enough, he accepted it when he'd finish a painting and still feel like he could do so much more, and most importantly, he'd accepted it when it had been told straight to his face.

There was no chance of him being a big shot out here, which is why it scared him so deeply when someone like Teddy saw him as he was, something special. Not just another face in the crowd, but an individual with good qualities and flaws, scars and all, he saw the shifter as someone worthy enough to fall in love with.

He didn't get it. Who was he in comparison to the giant that sat on his hands and knees over him. He was nothing, a weed growing from the cracks in the sidewalk, an inconvenient breeze that ruffled the hair of the passers by, truly forgettable and insignificant when compared to the likes of Teddy. It made sense why the police didn't bother with the almost a hundred letters, and why they didn't bother looking into his uncle's sudden dropping off of the face of the earth. People like him didn't even take up space in this world, making them all the more worthless. He needed to take a break from work, stop analysing every word his stalker wrote to him, as it seemed to really be getting to his head and psyche.

"I.. I don't know what to do now." Hosah admitted, finally looking up to see the giant face above him. This is what he wanted, but now that he had it, what else was there to look forward to?

"I mean.. We don't have to necessarily do anything." Teddy's voice was much more hushed, something he'd taken into account ever since hurting the shifter's much smaller ears.

Hosah didn't say anything, he didn't have the mental energy to think of anything useful to add. The pale hand which dwarfed him in comparison inched closer to the shifter's shrunken form. They were good hands. Almost paper white, although his knuckles and fingertips were still red from being out in the cold. Nice, large, gentle hands. It was all Hosah could really ask for. Teddy's fingers weren't like his own, they were straight, and cut off almost like perfect rectangles at the end, although they were anything but sharp and rough. His recollection of the digits seemed to be correct, as a bent finger brushed the same cheek the same hand once held in its palm. This was nice. No confrontation of their feelings, just silent touch.

"I didn't expect it to be like this." The shifter finally commented, leaning into the touch like it was the last time he'd ever receive it.

Although he wasn't looking at his face, he could tell Teddy had that stupid, goofy smile on his face that he always wore whenever he had a one-up on Hosah.

"What do you mean?" Teddy said in a quietened laugh. The shifter wondered what the pair looked like from a different angle, and how ridiculous the giant would be from a birds-eye sort of view, as he sat on all fours with his back bent almost inhumanly in order to get closer to Hosah in his new form.

"In the movies they.. I don't know, they confess their love and they kiss passionately and suddenly they've got it all figured out and it's smooth sailing from there. But I still have no idea. It's all the same, except, I guess some things have been... cleared up." The shifter rambled on with no control over what specifically he said, not that this was a problem when in Teddy's company.

"Maybe it's the kissing passionately part we're missing. That's the key," The giant joked, but with how he looked towering above the shifter, his hair cascaded forward, the overhead lamp looking almost like a halo from this angle, honestly made Hosah want to try it out.

The shifter gave a sigh of amusement, "Don't get too ahead of yourself."

"Right," Teddy inhaled sharply, second guessing himself before continuing, "If you want to go.. Really super slow, we should do that. I don't want to bring all of this onto you when there's a lot going on. I don't know. It feels kind of sudden, I just.. Said it, I couldn't really hold it in for much longer."

"It's okay. I don't think I would've really lasted either. Things don't have to change, we don't really act like just friends anyway." Reminiscing on the month, or, however long it'd been as it felt like years, that they'd known each other, Hosah realised just how couple-y they'd acted all along. He didn't know any just friends that held hands on the street or that held each other in the night.

"Maybe not," Teddy sighed, his smile softy spread across his perfect pink cheeks, a satisfied and content expression that told Hosah all would be okay.

And for a moment, it really did feel like everything would be okay. There was no stalker in the window, there was no sudden phone call of a case reopening, there was nothing, in fact. The city was unusually quiet, as if everyone and everything had stopped in place just for the two of them to have this moment.

The giant really was beautiful, Hosah thought to himself as he sat, leant back with his neck craned up to face the figure that towered over his shrunken body. A kind of once-in-a-lifetime, unforgettable type of beauty that one would dream about for years after seeing a glimpse of out of the corner of their eye, or in the reflection of a window, or when the train passes through a crowded station. The sort of face that would make you do a double take in the street, which people most certainly did.

It was all his little features that stuck out the most, especially at such an angle. His hair curled at the ends, clearly wanting to go into coils but either it wasn't long enough or it wasn't being taken care of properly to be able to do so. His cheeks were covered in small, dark freckles, as were his arms and his legs, and even his hands and fingers. Even Teddy's nose was perfectly sculpted, completely straight and symmetrical, unlike his thick, bushy eyebrows that Hosah itched to pluck at and clean up as he obsessively did his own. He wondered how far his freckles went down, if the giant had one on his stomach and chest like his own abnormally large and almost quite garish mole on his abdomen which completely dwarfed his belly button.

"You look deep in thought." Teddy commented, shifting from his knees to laying on his stomach on the carpeted floor. They could've just moved to the bed, as the sun had already long set; the creepy cat clock that hung menacingly on the crowded wall was just about to strike eleven.

The shifter stood to his full, minimal height, the hand making him look as small as ever in comparison. Each crevice of the palm fit perfectly into his own, as if they were two pieces of a much bigger jigsaw puzzle that needed to be put together to reveal the full picture. Hosah wasn't really one to believe in fate or a magical red string, but as his fragile body went limp against the flesh wall, each groove of his back being effortlessly supported by the- slightly calloused but still, blissfully soft palm, he thought for a brief second that this was just right. He didn't need the cabin by the lake, or his job at the detectives agency, he didn't even need anyone else in the world to keep him company, just Teddy and this moment would be enough for him.

Hosah thought about what the doctor had told him the previous day; a concept called the butterfly effect, that one seemingly small and insignificant choice or event can cause a long trail of consequences, completely altering the course of someone’s life forever. That theory seemed to check out, as from the clouded window, he could see the stars shone bright through the light polluted city sky for the first time in years.

[naneun-no]

It's kinda weird that the discussion is always on if jikook will ever officially come out because I'd selfishly like to see it and I think it would be earth shattering but I'm also not expecting every time I think of it I think of the namjoon who's gonna save the world vid. The point though is that Yoongi has been skirting a very thin line of not closeted to anyone with common sense but not officially™️ out and it's never a discussion on if he's ever gonna take that step it's always will jikook announce their relationship like that's not an even more complex conversation as for losing respect for them I think that parts wild because I really don't think that's something they owe anyone but I think I'd gain respect if any of them did ever went that route it doesn't seem impossible but again I'm not expecting it I don't even expect it from American celebrities and they are very decidedly not American

Hmm…that second sentence was one heck of a run on. Who are you, me? 😉 Bear with me, trying to follow you here.

I too think it would be earth-shattering. Between you and me (and anyone who reads this) I have this secret fantasy of the two of them showing up as a couple at the Met Gala. Idk why, I just feel like they would look amazing and it would be such a moment and I’ll just let it live on in my heart and mind since it will never happen in real life. Lol 😂

I’m honestly not sure which Namjoon video you mean… you’re not talking about the UN speak yourself speech are you?

It sounds like you’re saying that people put too much pressure on Jikook to come out not only as queer but also as in a relationship with each other, and you think there should be more of a balance and Yoongi should get some pressure too? Honestly… I’m not sure I’m seeing that pressure, or discussion like you referenced. Maybe the jikookers I follow are just exceptionally respectful, lol, but for the most part I see people understanding and accepting that we may never get confirmation of this relationship, and that honestly, we aren’t owed it. For the most part, jikookers (again, the ones I follow and interact with) are a respectful bunch who tend to have a fairly firm grasp of realistic expectations and cultural nuance.

You mentioned “losing respect for them”… like, if they don’t come out? I’m not sure what you’re referencing but I agree with you that it would be wild to lose respect for them over that. They are their own people and like you said they owe us nothing when it comes to their personal life choices.

You seem passionate about this and you didn’t ask for my advice but I’m going to offer it unsolicited anyways, so feel free to disregard: if there are shippers you follow who say disrespectful things like this about the guys or imply that Jimin and Jung Kook OR Yoongi need to “hurry up and come out” or something, I would say remove those people from your fandom experience. Unfollow, block, move on. There are times where it is necessary to consume content that is upsetting — like in the case of certain news/ world events or when we have to acknowledge injustice, etc. But I would argue that it is almost never necessary to consume upsetting content in a shipping space 😅 (editing this to add that I totally get the desire to argue against dumb opinions or behaviors and in fact will often engage with people on here to do just that — so I also encourage you to respectfully disagree with those people who have unrealistic expectations when and if you feel so inclined to do so. Just, you know. Manage your energy and space.)

In terms of the pressure for public figures to come out, @jikook-married made a great post about this recently that addresses the problems with that kind of thinking, I think you should give it a read if you haven’t already (it’s not letting me link her direct post for some reason so I’m linking my reblog of it):

[lovingcorleone]

“The Deal That Never Happened” — Sonny Corleone x Reader x Tom Hagen

Summary: Tom and Sonny need Y/N's help to help them out.

Pairing: platonic!Sonny Corleone x Lawyer!Fem!Reader x ex!Tom Hagen

Author's note: (English is my second language.) ; First of all, I'm not a lawyer, I don't have any degree in area of law, I have no idea how these things work, but I had fun while writing it and doing some research! I don't know how did I come up with this plot ...but enjoy!

Author's note 2: Reader is Tom's ex girlfriend and events take place after Michael killed Sollozzo and McCluskey, but could not escape to Sicily. also, I was thinking about part. 2?

Warning: strong language, mentions of murder

THE DEAL THAT NEVER HAPPENED

The very original plan of the Corleone's revenge didn't turn out as one would expected. Michael Corleone did, in fact, kill both Sollozzo and McCluskey, but he was not able to catch a flight to Sicily. This was a key moment, which led to nothing but more trouble. While he was hiding, Tom and Sonny were thinking about the next step. The oldest Corleone boy wasn't entirely innocent either. Santino was guilty just as much as Michael, though he wasn't the one holding a gun. Michael, their brother was in grave danger, and that was the other reason they needed to react quickly. Violence was not an option anymore. The legal and diplomatical work of white-collared person was a necessity at that time. Luckily for them, Tom had this specific person in his mind. Y/N L/N. The greatest lawyer he ever met...and dated. When he told Sonny about his idea, he thought that Tom was joking, but eventually he changed his mind and was willing to ask her for help.

Y/N was always very busy, but never too busy to help her friend. Even though, she and Tom were not a couple anymore, she told him to always count on her when his world will fall apart. She was fully aware of an affair that recently happened with murdering Sollozzo and the police officer. She even knew that it had something to do with the Corleone family. In her field she was the best. That kind of person you really want to have on your side. Don Corleone himself once wanted to put her on his list of people he hoped that would help him one day. These people would get extra money and that was hell of a motivation. But Tom strongly disagreed with his adoptive father and said that he wanted Y/N keep far away from their family business. Don wasn't surprised by Tom's reaction, because he knew that Tom still cared about Y/N.

Their meeting held a place in their house, right in Don's office. When Y/N stepped out of a car, Sonny and Tom were already waiting for her. Tom was nervous as hell, but just like always he hid it quite nicely but not completely. Sonny smirked at Tom. „When was the last time you two saw each other?“ „Long time ago. Anyway. We're gonna talk business, so no unnecessary comments. Do you think you can do that, Sonny?“ Tom shot a glance to his brother and Sonny rolled eyes. „For a moment I thought I was hearing our father. I still don't like this idea, but it's the best thing we have now.“ When Tom saw Y/N coming to them, he immediately ran to welcome her. They politely shaked hands and Y/N gave him a faint smile. „Thank you for coming here so quickly. We- I appreciate it.“ Tom said a low voice and Y/N nodded. „Sure. No problem. I'm glad you called.“

Before falling in endless pit of awkwardness, Sonny jumped between them and welcomed her as well. „Let's go inside before this will get suspicious.“ he said with warm smile and all three disappeared behind the closed doors.

While Y/N was preparing her things, neither of Tom or Sonny dared to start a conversation. After 5 minutes, Y/N looked at Sonny, who suddenly started to feel not very cooperative. „Alright, Mr. Corleone. Take a chair and sit right in front of me. Don't ask, just do as I said. It will be more effective.“ Y/N stated as Sonny sat down with a grumpy look on his face. All of a sudden he felt less confident as usual. Their eyes met and both of them stared at each other more than it is appropriate. Y/N leaned back in big chair and put her hands on the desk in front of her. „If looks could kill.“ she smirked. Sonny frowned and Tom just quietly chuckled. „Let's take a look into your file, shall we?“ „Wait, I have a file? How's that possible?“ „Everyone who commited some kind of crime, has a file. But you have just one, because your father made sure that you have all your files destroyed. This one is considered as your first and only one, so let's act like it.“ Sonny's facial expression changed from being grumpy to being surprised to being a bit upset. He took out a cigarette from a little box and lit it. Y/N let out a sigh and opened the file. Then she looked at man in front of her with a sympathy, but it wasn't completely sincere. „You're upset, yeah, I get it. You are really someone– Don's first born.“ Sonny, well-known hothead, angrily pointed a finger at Y/N. „Watch your next words!“ „Sonny...“ Tom warned him.

After what happened to Don, Sonny was extra cautious what people were talking about his father. Y/N knew that Santino was kind of hard to work with, but she did not plan to give up on him. „Look, I'm just trying to do my job here.“ she smiled, „So..shall we get started?“ A smoke left Sonny's mouth as he nodded. Y/N started to pulling out bunch of papers from her bag and handed him a pen. „For the very start, please, uh, sign this...this..aaaand this.“ The oldest Don's son's jaw dropped a bit while looking at what he had to sign. He really thought that they are gonna just talk without doing the boring part. But still, without any more words, he signed everything. „Good, perfect! Such a nice handwriting you have.“ Y/N enthusiastically remarked while putting away signed papers. She could swear that Sonny's cheeks flushed with a pink color for a second. Tom watched them from his own desk in the office, and he felt so proud that Y/N agreed to take their case. Meanwhile, Sonny felt almost intimidated by her presence. „Ahh, sorry. I forgot about these papers...Here. I need another your signature. Just three more and we're done..for now.“ Sonny looked at Y/N like she was crazy, but signed it anyway. What else he could do. „You done? Perfect! You know, the bureaucrats...They always want their paperwork.“ Y/N giggled and shrugged her shoulders like it was normal thing. And for her it was. She loved doing her job, being a lawyer. Sonny finished his cigarette and after a few minutes of complete quietness, Y/N voice's echoed again. „Okay, listen. Let's get into your case..“ „Fucking finally.“ „Don't interupt me, Santino.“ „ ...Sorry.“ „I know what you are thinking. 'This is a mistake! I shouldn't be sitting here!' Well, they don't think that.“ she said that in high-pitched voice accompanied by wide smile on her face. Tom couldn't help but snorted and earned himself an annoyed look from Sonny, who certainly didn't find it amusing. „Thanks for the sympathy, but can we get into that case? We are kinda running out of time. I already signed those fucking papers, what more those dickheads want? I know this is a part of your job, I get it, but! Can we move on?“ the hothead miserably throwed hands into the air. Y/N eyes were fixed on him, not saying a word. She clicked her tongue and put her hands together. „Good. So you understand that I'm just doing my job here. The job you asked me to do.“ she whispered but her face was unreadable. „I was thinking. Your situation is pretty bad at the moment. But I think I have a solution of some kind. Listen, I'm here to strike a possible deal with you, but we will soon get to that part, okay?“ Sonny nodded and his eyes got a bit brighter when the part with a deal was mentioned. „Suddenly how excited you got. Wow.“ she chuckled for herself and shaked her head. „Uhm, so... How about take a look at your crime? You've been charged with Criminal Conspiracy with code 479. Okaaay. Let's see what it says here.. Yikes. Ordering and attempting a murder. But if I remember it correctly..You wanted to avenge your father, so you sent your brother, Michael Corleone, to kill Virgil Sollozzo and also police officer Mark McCluskey. Michael was supposed to make a deal. But that deal never happened. Are you following me?“ „ Yeah. I mean..all correct. So far. Continue.“ Y/N looked at Tom and he approvingly nodded. „You did what you did, and now we're having this conversation. But without Michael, because... we don't know his whereabouts. Too bad, because he was the one who killed them, not you. You only prepared it. Sounds like this is all your work. Oops.“ she raised her eyebrows, pulled her lips into a thin line and then let out a deep sigh. „Tom, are you familiar with criminal conspiracy, mostly when it comes to participation in it?“ she shot a quick glance at man sitting afar from them. He nodded. „In most states, those who have helped plan a crime but have not participated in the actual crime may be given the same sentence as the person who committed the crime himself.“ he responded and Y/N faintly smiled at his

correct answer. He did not forget these things and Y/N was genuinely happy about it. He may have been a consigliere at that time, but deep inside there was an amazing lawyer hidden in him. She stayed silent for a moment thinking about words what she was about to say and then quickly licked her lower lip. „I may or may have not a deal for you. It just depends on you. And on your cooperation.“ Sonny sat on the edge on his chair and looked into her eyes listening carefully. His anger disappeared. „Alright. What do I need to do then?“ A smug smile flashed on her lips and she shook her head. „This is not about you, Mr. Corleone.“

Silence. Sonny frowned at what she just said, but still confidently smiled like he understood. He was taken back. And Tom was too, but not as much as his brother. So far Sonny did not meet a woman that would have behavior like Y/N had. But in the end, it was her job. However, Sonny must have admitted that Y/N was super smart with lots of courage. Tom was right about her. However, Santino needed to think straight, he needed to focus. Y/N shrugged her shoulders. „Listen, if it was up to me, which is not up to me, it's up to the authorities above me, and they say that you are a criminal. But, if it was up to me...I would like your family to get out of this mess and continue living your lives.“

[spacebarnes]

we we're too young ✧ t.holland

summary: when the pressure of the age ends a relationship, a song comes.

warnings: swearing, fluff at the end

a/n: i really love Louis and the lyrics of this songs are painful, so why not? requests are open! english it's not my first language so i'm so sorry about any mistake, take care of yourself pls! <3 (not my gif)

When you broke up with Tom, you promised yourself that you would never speed things up in a relationship again.

And maybe that's what ruined everything. Moving in together in your early 20s and starting a new life just the two of you was either the best or the worst relationship decision. But, you were two teenagers in love, sure that you were each other's soul mate, who would dare break your illusion?

It had been almost three years since you left the apartment, ending it all there. You knew you couldn't keep Tom's name from being all over Hollywood, or even coming up as a topic of conversation with your friends, but you could avoid seeing him at events. And that's exactly what you did over the years.

Right now you were getting ready for a performance with Louis Tomlinson and other singers that all of you were giving at a community event for a foundation.

"Hey," you spoke as Lana, your makeup artist, finished applying some blush to your cheeks. "You're already here?"

"I'm in the parking lot," Sebastian replied and you could hear the sound of a car door closing. "Dua is already singing?"

"I think so, why?" you asked as you grimaced so Lana could apply more product to your face.

"Cause i don't wanna look like i only care about you." his voice sounded somewhat agitated, indicating that he was walking towards the door of the building.

"But you only care about me." you replied with a giggle, listening as he also laughed lightly.

"I know but, sounds rude," Lana put her things away and left you alone, not before you thanked her for the amazing job she had done on your face. "And what are you singing besides Too Young?"

"Moonlight, Dangerous Woman, Positions and Nasty." Sebastian couldn't see you, but you had a smirk in your face.

"So you're getting nasty, huh?" you laughed at the comment you knew he would make about the song. "Oh, and by the way. Tom is-" he couldn't finish the sentence because you interrupted him.

"Ugh," you rolled your eyes without him being able to see you. "Can we just not talk about him? It's been like three years, c'mon. Everybody needs to get over it."

"Alright big girl, see you over here. Bye."

The call ended and the sentence that your friend didn't finish started to haunt your head. Why did he name your ex? Sebastian wasn't usually one of those people who always named him, he only did it when it was something important or very urgent, what would have happened?

Your thoughts faded when three knocks sounded at your door.

"Love, you're ready? We gotta go!" the accent of Louis reached your ears and you just tried to hide the smile that formed on your face knowing that you were already going on stage.

"Coming!" you shouted back and gave yourself one last look in the mirror before dropping your cell phone on the little red couch. You saw the screen light up, indicating that you had gotten a notification but you didn't take any notice, it was surely from a fan.

Cindy:

You're gonna die.

I just saw Harry, Sam and Tom in like four tables behind us.

He's here for you.

"I have to say you look very pretty." the boy next to you complimented you as the both of you walked down the big hallway to get to the stage.

"Thanks, Tommo," you thanked him with a big smile. "You look great too, and i'm sure that you are gonna do a show out there."

"Bullshit," he shook his head, hiding the smile that had formed on his face. "But we are gonna rock the stage, and then you will do it by yourself." he said with a big smile, causing one on you and hugging you around your waist.

"Y/N, put this on." the sound guy handed you a yellow headset with your initial engraved on it as you arrived on stage, a big red cloth covering both of you.

"I saw some of your cast friends out there." this made your eyes sparkle a little, you were excited to know that they actually did come.

"Oh yeah, I invited some of them. I'm happy they came to support the event."

"Yeah, but there was this guy," he grimaced trying to remember and bit his lower lip. "I don't remember his name, but he was with two other people."

"Are you sure that he was from Marvel?" you asked with furrowed brows and he nodded immediately.

"Yeah, i've seen his face in the movies before."

"Maybe it was Hemsworth with Liam and Elsa, i dunno." you shrugged and Louis just nodded, trusting you.

The two of you turned on your microphones so you could start talking as you had previously rehearsed.

"So yeah, I hear Louis Tomlinson can't sing at all." you spoke into the mic, causing several of the fans who bought a ticket to scream.

"Well, I hear Y/N Y/L doesn't sing that well. She can't even get to the high notes!" his voice echoed throughout the venue as you two laughed quietly behind the curtain. This was all based on the many criticisms the two of you were receiving.

"Ugh, yeah. And that two assholes have a show tonight." you spoke as you watched the canvas begin to open, making the screams grow louder.

"I bet that they won't even be able to fill half the forum." Louis and you take a step out of the shadows.

"Oh shit!" you exclaimed when you saw how many people were there. You and Louis had sent out a large number of invitations to various artists, but you didn't expect everyone to go. Your eyes quickly visualized Sebastian next to Elizabeth. In one corner was Ryan Reynolds and in the other Lily Collins, there really were a lot of stars in the place. Finally, some fans were right in front of the stage, separated from everyone else.

"They really made it," your friend said between a chuckle before speaking again. "How is it going?" he openly asked all the people, earning several shouts of excitement.

"Alright, so, first of all," you looked to your left for Tomlinson's approval before continuing to speak, he just closed his eyes and nodded. "Thanks to everybody for coming tonight. It really means a lot to Louis and I that you could donate a little money for the kids that belong to this foundation. I didn't thought that so many of you would come today, I honestly just thought Sebastian and my mom would come," you admitted with a nervous laugh, eliciting one from the listeners and earning an on-air kiss from Sebastian "But yeah, again, thanks to all of you for showing up today. I'm sure that all of these kids thank you with all their hearts."

"So many boring things but no action, let's hear it!" Louis said and he walked back a bit so he could sit on the small wooden benches that were on the stage. Unlike the other artists, the two of you wouldn't be doing a big performance for Too Young.

And that's because Too Young is not a very happy song. You and Louis wrote it when you were just coming out of your relationship and feelings were running high. It was a special and painful song.

The melody started to play and you shared a big smile with the guy to your right before you started singing.

we were too young

to know we had everything

too young, I wish I could've seen it all along

i'm sorry that i hurt you, darling, no, oh

we were too young

Emotions and memories began to fill your mind. It was hard to sing this song without feeling a sense of guilt at all.

i've been looking back a lot lately

me and you is all I've ever known

it's hard to think you could ever hate me

but everything's feeling different now

Your eyes were focused on Jake Gyllehaal and Blake Lively talking about your presentation. You had met Jake through Tom and had formed a great friendship, but you were curious to know what Blake thought.

oh, I can't believe I gave in to the pressure

when they said a love like this would never last

so I cut you off 'cause I didn't know no better

now I realise, yeah, I realise

Your eyes searched for Cindy and a couple of friends you knew were here just as you were singing the chorus. You noticed they were making some strange signs and pointing behind them, not understanding, you just furrowed your brows and finished your part of the song just for now Louis to start singing.

You didn't take your eyes off your friends, still trying to decipher what they wanted you to see or something that was bothering them. That's when you looked up a bit at the tables behind them and your eyes met with a curly-haired boy you instantly recognized.

Harry Holland.

You blinked several times to double check if it was him and not an illusion of your mind, but it was. He was wearing a black suit and next to him was Sam, who was wearing a white dress shirt and a brown jacket.

And then there was him.

Tom looked radiant as always. He was wearing an olive green suit with a gray shirt underneath and you looked away quickly when you saw that you two connected eyes for a second, as he had the same lost and in love look that he looked at you with a few years ago.

You felt a squeeze on your leg and quickly turned your gaze to see Louis, who asked you with his eyebrows and gaze if you were okay, to which you just nodded and swallowed dryly before moving your mouth back to the microphone.

it's been three years since I've seen your face

i'm trying to find some better words to say

before I let this moment slip away

'cause now I realise

Some had noticed that you had changed a part of the lyrics and others just kept smiling at the beautiful melody. You turned to look at Louis and just shrugged your shoulders with a small smile.

we were too young to know we had everything

too young, I wish I could've seen it all along

i'm sorry that I hurt you, darling, no, oh

we were too young

we were too young

we were too young

we were too young

we were too young

The song ended and your friend took your hand to move a little closer to the edge of the stage and take a bow for the whole audience, receiving applause for all of them.

"Good luck, love," the Brit hugged you and gave you a little kiss on the cheek, rubbing your shoulder one last time before taking the mic again. "Let's hear it for Y/N Y/L!"

The time progressed and you finished singing your songs as did Louis, thus ending the event and letting the guests leave the place freely.

"So we came here for nothing?" Harry asked before gluing his lips to the glass bottle, causing Tom to look away from you for a moment to look at his brother.

"Oh, shut up."

"He's got a point," Sam joined the conversation, setting the empty bottle down on the table. "I mean, you canceled today's work just to come see her and you're not going to talk to her. Really?"

Tom gave one last glance at his two brothers before returning his eyes to you, biting his bottom lip from nerves and the indecision he felt.

You looked as pretty as ever. You waved goodbye, hugged and made small talk with each departing guest, thanking them for attending.

"Alright, this is what is gonna happen," the older of the twins caught the attention of his two brothers again. He grabbed his satchel from the table and straightened his jacket. "You are gonna talk to her, and Harry and I are going to wait for you in the car." Sam winked at him before motioning to his twin to signal for them to leave the place.

"Don't be a movie star and talk to her." that was the last thing Harry said, patting Tom's shoulder and calling him by the nickname that so annoyed him.

The brown-haired man sat there for a moment with his eyes down, not knowing what to do. And to his bad luck, when he raised his eyes to look for you, you were gone.

Not knowing what to do, he quickly found Sebastian with Anthony and Chris, so he decided to send him a message.

Tom:

hey, mate.

Sebastian connected glances with Tom and grimaced that he didn't understand why he was texting him instead of approaching him. The Brit just pointed to his cell phone, implying to text him back.

Sebastian:

No

Tom:

c'mon

Sebastian:

I know what you're going to ask me

She's in her dresser

Don't be a dick, please, and if she doesn't want to talk to you, don't push her.

Tom:

I won't

thanks x

He didn't wait a second longer and got up from his place, heading quickly to the back stage area and crossing the long hallway to get to your dressing room.

He took a breath of air in front of the red door that had a small sign with your name on it. After a few seconds, he knocked four times.

"Come in!" you said, thinking it was Sebastian and when you heard the door open you spoke again. A cotton circle with makeup remover rubbing against your eye. "Are we leaving now, Seb? I thought that you wanted to talk to Anthony and Chris-" you spoke without paying much attention, until you turned your chair around and met brown eyes and not blue.

"Hey." Tom spoke timidly and raised his left hand to greet you. His lips formed a line.

"Tom, hey," you greeted him so as not to look rude. "What are you doing here?" you asked somewhat nervously, as you knew perfectly well why he was standing in front of you.

'"I just wanted to see you. Your show out there was amazing."

"Thank you." you thanked him with a forced smile and the room filled with silence for a moment.

"Do you think that we had everything back then, but we were too young?" your ex's question broke the silence. And it also broke the barrier of the past, letting all the memories come back.

"Tom, i-"

"Just say it." he said and knelt before you, taking your hands in his and connecting gazes.

His eyes were the same as always. The same ones full of love, and the same ones that shed tears the day you left London to start over in Boston.

"I do."

"And do you think that now we are old enough to make things right?" that question fell like a bucket of cold water, you didn't expect it at all and you didn't want to answer it.

You didn't want to because the answer was yes.

"I think so too," you closed your eyes and just let your feelings speak for you. "I think about it everyday. I think that if maybe if we had been mature enough back then, everything would have worked out correctly."

This was an intimate moment between the two of you, and you didn't need to be unclothed to see each other's nakedness. The two of you were baring your souls completely.

"But now we are old enough-"

"But it's not the same, Tom." a bittersweet smile formed on your face. You really wanted to try again, but you couldn't.

"It is the same, and i know it because," he paused and squeezed your right hand even tighter than before. "In the deep of my heart, i still know that you still drink ice coffee in the morning with exactly eight ice cubes. I still know that you always watch the same series because trying to watch new ones never works. I still know that after a concert you take two bottles of water for your throat and take a long nap for five or six hours. I still know that it bothers you that the sunlight comes through the window and hits you directly in the eyes, but still, your dream apartment has big windows."

"And I still know because over the years I never stopped loving you, and I am convinced that I never will." your heart twisted a little when you heard that he remembered every little detail of your life, and how true everything he had said about you was. Tom just remained silent, waiting for an answer from you.

"You know what?" you asked and a smirk formed on your face as you helped Tom up and you did the same. "My grandmother used to tell me the story of the red thread. The red thread binds two people together, and this can stretch, contract or tangle. But it's impossible for it to break."

"So, that means that you would try it again with me?" he asked with his voice full of illusion and put his hands on your waist, desperate to have contact with you.

"I will, yes. And better work this time, Holland." you teased him, running your hands around his neck so you could hug him properly.

"It will, i promise."

[jaywritesfics]

Since requests are open could I get platonic c!Tommy x female! reader?

Okay, so reader is almost perfect Technoblade copy. She is god at PvP, genius tactician and can build very well.

She never settles down, or at least it seems like it. She has a base far in the nether, hidden from everyone but not many know that. To people it seems like she is always on her way, gathering resources and training, always on the move.

One day, she saves smol (like 9-13 year old Tommy) from mobs and decides to help him with training (reader is already an adult). They form a parent-child bond and reader becomes this mother figure to him. However, reader after some time wants to leave, and does so, some time before events of the smp starts. She was kind of controlling the whole situation, as in as long as she was there she was the mediator for everyone, basically unofficial ruler of the server. The moment she disappeared, everything crumbled.

So, time skip to Tommy's exile when his mental and physical health is declining, reader returns from her adventures and stumbles upon him. She is angered at what had happened and after taking care of him and making sure to bring him to the normal state, she goes straight to the cities to bring back balance by kicking some ass.

I'm leaving ending up to you, hopefully it won't be this complicated

Good luck ❤️❤️❤️

OMG I LOVE THIS!!! I’m sorry if this seems a bit rushed... (Because it was...) I really wanted to get this done before the school week because I have so much stuff to do. I will make a second part since this was kinda short and not the entire story I had planned. I will try to get the second part out as soon as I can but for now I hope you enjoy this! I hope I did your request justice!

|Burning Pile |Part.1| Platonic c!Tommy x Reader|

Warnings?: Swearing, Angst, and mentions of suicide.

Request?: Yes!  Thanks lukerycyja for the request!

Pronouns?: None used but female reader implied. Also sorry if this isn’t completely accurate to the canon smp storylie its been so long since I’ve watched any of Tommyinnits Lore streams due to school work, so please cut me slack if I messed up on any of that stuff...0-0 

Extra notes?: Part two is on it’s way soon!

“Shit…” You’ve been traveling the surface for hours and you just now realized you forgot your axe at your base. You groan in annoyance and find a nearby tree and sit down to relax because your feet had started to hurt and you open your bag and take out some apples to eat. You usually come to the surface every other month for food and resources, as you live in the nether and it doesn’t have cows and pigs… Well unless you can call those Piglin actual pigs.

“Okay,” You begin to say to yourself, 

“I forgot my axe and now I have to go all the way back to my portal…*sigh*, why do I do this to myself?” You take a bite of your apple and you just sit and take in the scenery. When you spot a couple of tree stumps and a wood wall not too far away from where your sat.

 “Oh shit.” You say aloud, dropping your apple. You hear the sound of humming coming from behind the wall and you stand up to hurry and get out of there…You never interact with anyone… your by yourself all the time... You used to have company though. A little boy you saved so many years ago. Tommy. His name was Tommy. You basically raised him for years… He was like a son to you. You trained him to fight and fend for himself when he eventually grew up and didn’t need you anymore. You haven’t seen him since you decided to leave. Why did you leave? You can’t quite remember. You hear a voice coming from behind the wall… it sounds so familiar. You near the wall and you place an ear against it to listen in on whoever is behind it. 

“Why Tubbo? Why. Why? Why?” The voice sounds even more familiar than before, Is it who you think it is? If so, who's Tubbo? Maybe it’s not him… It couldn’t be… You walk around and spot an opening and you peer around the corner. You see the backside of the person. Short yet untamed blonde hair, Red and white tore shirt and ripped tan pants. It’s him… It has to be… You step inside the structure, tears rolling down your face. 

“Tommy?” You say in a shaky voice. He turns around eyes wide. He has bags under his eyes, and the once light blue color has faded to blue-tinted grey. He stares at you and his jaw drops. A single tear falls from his eye then he shuts his mouth and turns away covering his ears with his hands.

“Dream whatever sick game you're playing I’m not falling for it! One of these days so help me I’ll kill you!”  Dream? Who is… Shit, You’ve been gone so long you can’t seem to remember a single damn other person. 

“Tommy, I don’t know who Dream is but… it’s me… Y/n… I- I’m sorry for leaving I just…”

“Just stop!” He throws a sword at your head but it just misses you and hits the wall beside you. 

“Now come on I taught you better than that…” You say to him, walking up to him and kneeling down to look him in the eyes. 

“It’s really me Tommy-” You try to finish your sentence but he already has his arms wrapped around you. You can feel teardrops falling on your shoulders and you can’t help but start crying too.

“Y/n… I missed you! Why did you have to leave! You bitch!” He hugs you tighter as he speaks, more tears rolling down his face.

“I’m sorry Tommy I just… I don’t remember… and- I- I’m sorry…” Your makeshift “family reunion” is interrupted by an arrow flying past both your heads. You stand up and turn around to see a tall man in a green hoodie with a mask with some silly face on it. It must be that Dream guy Tommy was talking about. 

“Who the fuck are you bitch?” He says pointing his crossbow at you. 

“What did you just call me? Also, a 5-year-old called, he wants his arts and crafts project back.” You say, he tenses up and takes a step forward.

“Leave now or I’ll put an arrow in your head, bitch.” He adjusts his crossbow and you reach for the bow and arrow on your back and in an instant you fire an arrow at him, piercing his arm. 

“Now I could have put it through your head but I like to look my victims in the eyes when I kill them… it's more fun that way.” You tell him with a huge grin on your face. He drops his crossbow and pulls the arrow out of his arm and takes an ender pearl out of his pocket and throws it in the distance and he disappears within seconds. You look behind you to see Tommy shocked and crying. You kneel down, pick him up and start walking him over to what seems to be his bed. You set him down and give him one of the apples in your bag. 

“Are you okay Tommy? You don’t seem well.” You tell him, wiping the tears from his eyes. 

“I’m- I’m fine-” He tries to get his words out but he passes out and you quickly pick him up and hold him in your arms. You can still feel him breathing so you don’t worry too much, but you also can’t help but cry. You lay him down and you put his blanket over him. You decide that he probably is just stressed out and needs sleep so you let him rest. You take this time to hunt down some cows and pigs for food. You walk around paranoid that Dream might come back and try to hurt you or Tommy. You bag about 2 cows and 4 pigs and just as you return from hunting you see Tommy sitting on the bed with his face buried in his hands. You drop your kills and you walk over to sit down on the bed beside him. 

“You feel a bit better? If so then I gotta ask you… What are you doing alone out here all by yourself? You’re only like what, 16 at most? When I left, you had friends and other allies… how did you end up all alone?” You question him, he looks at you angered,

“How did I end up alone? How did I fucking end up alone?” He then stands up and starts to yell at you,

“You fucking left me! You left me with nothing but a couple of years of bloody sword training and the mentality of a soldier! I thought you actually cared for me like a son… But no, you just saw me as another helpless little boy who needed your guidance… Well, I don’t need your help! I can’t be helped! I’m the one who got exiled. I’m the one whose friends betrayed him!” His voice goes from a yell to a soft stern voice.

“I tried to build a nation… It was amazing... but I fail at everything. It crumbled...I should have never even tried… I should have offed myself when I had the chance…” He’s on the floor on his knees, sobbing with his head in his hands again. You stand up from the bed and kneel down to hug him. 

“Tommy… I’m so sorry that that’s how you felt about it… I had no idea how I really affected you… Tommy… I- I’m so sorry… I do love you like a son Tommy... And you’re the best son anyone could ask for… your not a failure, you deserve to live… but may I ask…”

You release him from the hug and look at him in the eyes,

“What do you mean by exiled?” (you decide to skip over the whole “build a nation” part, because you really aren’t surprised by it.) 

“Tubbo- I mean Dream. Well… They banished me from L’manberg they banished me from my home!  They banished me here to live on my own… I have nothing…”

“You don’t have nothing… You have me. I’ll help you, Tommy.” Your blood boils. They banished Tommy... Why? You don’t care… either way, you’re going to kill them… Whoever this Tubbo guy is… Your gonna kill him and Dream. You stand up and bring Tommy to his feet and wipe away his tears. 

“Go practice your sword throwing Tommy, I’ll make us some dinner.” You say as you walk over to the sword he had previously attempted to throw at you and take it out the wall.

“Hey, my sword throwing is great!” 

“Heh.. sure.” You hand him his sword and he groans jokingly and he walks outside and starts throwing his sword at some tree. You chuckle at the sight and you start to prepare your guy’s meal. You also grab your own sword and examine it. You sigh,

“Those bitches are gonna get what’s coming to them…” You whisper to yourself under your breath.

“Hey y/n! I hit my target!” Tommy yells to you.

“Good Tommy! I’m proud of you…”

[a-mended-pact]

Unsteady Keys: Chapter 9

A/n: Hey everyone. I hope you're all doing well. I'm pretty proud of this chapter. Please let me know what you think.

Warnings: this chapter does contain flashbacks, mentions of slightly toxic relationships. Mentions of Spencer's mom. Panic attacks. If there are anything more to add let me know

Requests are open

Word count : 3,024

It's been a couple of hours since we've gotten to work. I couldn't find Spencer anywhere. I needed to tell him that there was a lead on Lindsey due to Simmons giving Ethan a cognitive interview. I had called him a handful of times and gotten no answer.  Which is weird but with everything that's happened he has every right to have some alone time. I was still trying to call him when I found him in Morgan's old office. I don't know why I checked the cafeteria and the break room first. I felt myself facepalm as I looked around the room. 

He was in a daze and hadn't even noticed my presence until I moved myself into the floor across from him. I leaned against the desk for support as I looked up at him. He glanced at me and then looked away. The hand he was using to prop his head up seemed to tense. 

'You smell like mint and your cologne.' I said it with a small amount of amusement.  I knew he would change. It didn't bother me if anything. I'm surprised he even went to work with the smell of my essence laced into his skin and his breath. He nodded to acknowledge what I had said. 

'Love? Is everything alright?' He looked at me then and held my gaze. 'I know I said I'd talk to Ethan too but I can't seem to bring myself to. Seeing him for longer than a couple of hours has me remembering things with him so intensely.' 

A soft comforting smile formed on my face as I gently grabbed the hand that rested on his knee and squeezed. 'There's a lead on Lindsey.  I was going to leave with the rest of the team to go check it out. If you wanna stay here I can tell Em. Maybe you can get something more from Ethan. Then Matt did. ' I kissed his forehead gently.

Just like that. I left him to his own devices letting him figure everything out for himself.  I was gonna need to tell Em he wasn't coming.

-------------

I walked into the interrogation room with Ethan and undid his handcuffs immediately.  I didn't like seeing him like an unsub. So until further evidence came about I wasn't going to treat him as such. 

'You look like you've seen a ghost Reid.  What's wrong?' I looked at him as I stood against the wall. 'Did- did you?- ' I found myself stuttering and searching for words. My hands moved about as if I were trying to grasp each word that flew around my mind until it formed a sentence. How do you speak to someone that you haven't spoken to in years? Not in depth anyway. 

'You're a big hot shot Mr. FBI. Married, professor most likely with a couple books published or at least articles and yet you are still just the same man I adored back then.' He spoke with care and love in his voice as he watched my face blanch at what he said.

If it wasn't for the fact he has seen me this way before I would have been far more embarrassed then I was. My mouth was still opening and closing and my hands had finally stopped. 'Did you? Was it you? I- was it you that hurt me? With the blade?' 

I had finally managed to collect my words and form a complete sentence even if it was laced with fear and sorrow. I was terrified he'd say yes. I was even more petrified if he said no. If he hadn't done it then I'd have nothing to hold against him. 

There was no way I could remain upset about something that happened in college and it wouldn't make me seem like an upset child. I hadn't bothered to meet Ethan's eyes. I was honestly too afraid of what he'd see residing in my own. 

I didn't hear him move and I didn't notice how close he got until he spoke. Making me jump and look out of the two way glass. This was a bad idea. I need to get out of here. I feel like the room is shrinking. 

Ethan cupped my face and forced me to look at him. The fact that this was being recorded made me even more nervous. What if the rest of the team found out what happened between us.

I finally met his gaze. I knew my eyes probably reminded him of the first time he ever hurt me. This time had nothing to do with the kiss I walked in on years ago.

'Spencer.' As he spoke his thumb traced my jaw. 'I would never. I could never hurt you.' I laughed bitterly and flinched when his thumb met the side of my lips. 'This was a mistake. I - I need some fresh air'. I quickly rushed out, locking the door behind me. 

I blew out a breath I didn't realize I was holding within my lungs as I felt my breathing start to quicken. I made my way to the roof of the building that no one really used. I slid down the door as I made it fully outside.  

I watched as the sun began to set. The sky turned different colors until emerging me in full darkness besides for the buildings lights I closed my eyes. Why do I feel like a young adult all over again? Why am I letting him get under my skin? The worst part was that he isn't even trying to make me feel like this.

One minute I was on the rooftop the next I was in the band room of our college laying on the ground with my head resting on Ethan's jacket as he played the piano.

'I could fall asleep to the sound of you playing. You know.' I said as each key played from his fingertips. His cologne was all over me because we may or may not have been making out on the floor before I scolded him that he needed to practice. He had a big concert event coming up. 

'I could think of better things to do in here than you falling asleep.' His voice was teasing, making me blush.  It had only been a few weeks since our first actual time together and in all honesty it made me nervous just thinking about it. Ethan seemed to want to sleep together constantly.  Which is fine. I loved having sex with him but sex was never something I thought I'd experience so I'd much rather be reading or learning something new.

Just the other day we got into an argument because I turned him down. 

I was sitting in a lecture with the man that created the Behavioral Analysis Unit. The BAU for short. At the time, I didn't want to get laid. I wanted to learn more about how learning to understand a serial killer could help catch them. I was deeply intrigued and asked many questions as the lecture hall went on.

'You know you did ditch me for some cop I don't see why now would be a bad time to make up for it?

'A federal Agent is hardly a cop and if you can't remember his job at least remember his name. Jason Gideon.'

Ethan scoffed in small annoyance as he continued to play. Only this time the sound of the piano sounded like chase music. I felt like it should play in Tom and Jerry. 

'You can't seriously be upset with me about that?' I said trying to sound calm and collected in reality I was upset. I originally went to college to learn all the things needed to be someone that taught others. I had been debating on changing my career path for sometime now and I think I finally found it. 

'I think I wanna try to join the BAU. Gideon already told me with how interested I was in the lecture and with how smart I am. I'd make a great addition to the team.'

He smashed his fingers on the piano and groaned. 'Reid we already planned our future together. Do you really wanna give that up to join the FBI?' The way he looked at me was as if I had broken his heart. It's not that I had forgotten our plans after college. The only problem was that I used to be able to see that future and now I couldn't. 

Since the class with Gideon and all the research I've done. Working for the FBI just made sense. It would cover everything for my mother's doctor's and Care facility. Plus being able to keep a great roof over my head and food in my belly. I suppose to Ethan not living life on the edge was boring.

I shook my head to escape the memory.  Out of all the ones to have right now, why did that one resurface? My head fell in my hands as I combed my hair out of my face. My phone went off with a text from Y/n. 

'Hey, so we found her abandoned hideout but it looks like she hasn't been here in a bit. I don't know if you've gone to see him or not but I figured you could maybe get more info? If you're feeling up to it of course. Otherwise he made a bond with Matt. He can try again when we get back.'

I sighed. I wasn't in the mood to see him again. I thought I could separate my feelings towards him from this case and I know I'm not doing it. Perhaps I should step back from this case. I should talk to Emily. I know I'd still have to deal with Cat ever so often but otherwise she was my wife's problem now. I slipped my phone back in my pocket and closed my eyes. Everything just seemed like too much right now. 

'Seriously we are not doing this right now Ethan?' I was putting back on my clothes.  Situating my hair as well. 'You are not going to make me late. I refuse to miss seeing my mother again because you can't not want to sleep with me when we are alone.'

I walked around him as I grabbed my bag to take with me to go see my mom. It held some overnight clothes. I had missed the last time they were going to allow me to stay. All because I gave in to Ethan's advances to make him happy. I loved him and when we weren't bickering things were fabulous. After a year of it though it's exhausting. 

He caught me by my hips and pulled me to him. I swatted his hands away. He may not have wanted anything from me but a proper goodbye but I didn't want to give him the chance. I had already prepared myself mentally for the arguing that was gonna come from me turning him down. Me leaving him alone for long periods of time made me nervous.  

He'd never done anything to make me anxious about leaving him. He'd only go to bars and play and have a couple of drinks with other musicians.  I had accompanied him plenty of times. Nothing ever happened besides musicians talking about anything and everything underneath the shitty neon lights of the bar.

'Tell your mom I said hi and that I hope she's doing well. Also tell her I'm sorry I kept you away last time. I don't know what came over me. ' He cupped my face and went to kiss me but I turned my head slightly.  Again. I'm not taking any chances. I'd happily lose anyone or anything as long as I still had my mom.  He ended up kissing my cheek. 

A sigh escaped him as he let me go. 'I'll see you when you get back. Yeah?' I nodded and smiled at him as I headed toward the door.

'Wait, Reid. I'll be going out tonight to play. I'll message you when I arrive and when I leave. I know how you worry. Tell me when you make it to your mom's.  I love you. ' I smiled as I ran off to see my mom.

A groan escaped me. Why? I'm so sick of these memories coming up. I looked around the roof and let out another sigh. I really need to let what happens next go. Yet before I could stop my brain it quickly wraps me and surrounds me in the memory and as it unfolds like a movie before my very eyes. I kept my vision from blurring from the unleashed tears. 

Time with my mom had gone by well from when I got there until now.  She started having a violent episode one that if I had stayed would have ended in her calling me crash again.  I'd never tell her she'd hit me. I just wanted comfort. So I came home early. Well to a place Ethan and I were renting together. I hadn't told him I was on my way home.  So when I came home to an empty place I wasn't surprised. I quickly dropped off my things and ran to where I figured he'd be.  The bar with his friends. It was rare anyone would be there right now actually drinking; they should just be setting their instruments.

Only when I came in I found Ethan behind stage with a girl's tongue shoved down his throat. There clothes slightly askew He pushed her away when he realized I was there. 'Spencer this isn't what It looks like!' 

I just stood there frozen. I couldn't form a word, I could barely comprehend what I saw.  When he stepped towards me. I turned away and just walked away. I felt like my heart had just been stomped into the ground after being clawed at unintentionally by my mother. I was broken. 

That night I got multiple calls and texts from Ethan. I ignored them all. I ended up sleeping on a campus bench. Comfy truly.  

I never fully spoke to Ethan after that day.  Things with my mom got chaotic and I didn't have the time to focus on anything but getting my PhD and taking care of my mom. As long as I was busy I couldn't blame myself that I was too afraid to face Ethan.  He broke my heart and I didn't even give him the opportunity to even try to explain himself.

That was ages ago though so why am I still thinking about it. Why won't my brain just shut up. I need to get back Inside. Maybe the team is back by now. 

------------

Having to find Spencer recently was starting to become a habit. I looked everywhere for him everywhere besides outside. I finally found him walking in from the stairway that led to the roof.

'Hey.' I gave him a small wave and what I hoped was a reassuring smile. This case was getting to him for obvious reasons. He honestly hasn't looked this distraught since after he came back from prison. 

His eyes widened slightly. 'Good you're all back already then?' I nodded. My eyes didn't want to leave him. I knew something had happened. I just didn't know what. Pushing him was never something I had done and I wasn't gonna start now. Maybe I'll just bring it up a little to see if he decides to tell me. If not then it can wait until he sorts out his mind.

'So we didn't find Lindsey.  We did find a couple of things though. Photos of you in Mexico. Photos of you even in the prison yard. Among others of max and you and us together.  Lindsey appears to be stalking us. Maybe it was something Cat asked her to do.  Or maybe Ethan was the one taking some of the photos.' I looked away and was staring at my hands as my brain started putting small pieces together. Theories really.

Spencer grabbed my hand gently and brought it up so I'd follow it with my eyes. 'I am actually debating on taking a step back from this case. I was gonna tell Emily and see what she thought.' The smile he gave me didn't reach his eyes. 

'Let's be honest it's probably for the best that I do. I know too much and I am far too involved, especially with Cat and Ethan both being a part of this. It's just more than I think I can handle. I could be wrong. Maybe I just need a day to breathe. I'll have to figure that out though.'

He placed my hand on his face and all I could do was rub my thumb across his jaw. I let out a small laugh suddenly. Which surprised him. 'I'm sorry it's not funny! I just kept thinking that If I pushed hard enough on your jawline would it cut me?' It was a terrible time for me to not be able to keep things to myself.  He needed me serious, right?

A laugh bellowed out of him and I could see some of the stress and pain he was carrying with him lift a little. I myself smiled too when he pulled me into his chest. 'Oh how I love you and your random thoughts.' He moved his hand to cup my cheek and leaned in as if he were gonna kiss me. 

One of our arrangements when we started dating was no PDA in the workplace if any, keep it always at a minimum. With what he was doing it was making me question if he was about to break that small rule. Not that I minded if he did or not though. 

He stroked my cheek and smiled at me as he pecked the tip of my nose and walked away.

I couldn't help but scrunch up my nose the way a bunny would. It tickled. A smile formed on my face as I watched him leave.

Taglist:

@sassymoon @rainsong01 @onlyhereforthefanfics @itsdars @dreatine

[lilylilym]

2000 years of Path Experiments and why AOT ending is the Ultimate Ending

In this essay, I will make an argument that the version that we saw in the AOT story is both an Ultimate Ending and the Last Resort where Eren has to be killed by Mikasa, which is something Mikasa could never accept before and thus Eren and Mikasa have been spending (two?) thousands of years in the path living their lives over and over again in hope of finding another way (Path Experiments). In the end, Mikasa's choice to kill Eren helped to solidify a reality and solve the Titan Problem.

The premise of my argument is that I think Eren and Mikasa have been exploring all of the alternatives outside of the main one we're watching, but every time they don't like how it ends, they restart another experiment to find a better one. This is the logic: Insofar as the Founding Titan Power exists and Eren has it, they could live infinite lives and carry on infinite Path Experiments, but once Eren (host of the Founding Titan and the Life Source) and the last Titan with royal blood (Condition for activating founding titan power) have been eliminated, the Path will close and the Titan Life Source itself will disperse. That will marks the end of the Titan Problem.

What is the Titan Problem? Both Zeke and Eren understood that what needs to be dealt with, is the Titan Life Source itself, which has been biologized and able to reproduce through blood-relation of human offsprings (subjects of Ymir). If not controlled through cannibalism, the Power of the Titan will spawn in a random child and the Titan Existence continues. Zeke and Eren could die a couple times over and wouldn't amount to anything. All you need to know is the enemy of Zeke is Titan Existence, and to a certain extent, that's what Eren is after as well. With their learned knowledge from the Path and the true matter of Titan Power, they perceived the existence of Titan Life Source itself to be the problem. If it continues to exist, it will implicate all Eldians and would be used as war machines. While Zeke wants to just sterilize all Eldians (thus prevent new children to obtain Titan Power and gradually eradicate all Titans), Eren think it would not make Paradis Eldians' lives better since the whole world already learned that Eldians are potential devils, taking away their offsprings is to sentence them to slow deaths subjected under intense discrimination.

Eren's Ultimate Plan and its Logic: At one point, it becomes increasingly evident to Eren that he needs to die in the ultimate course of action: come into contact with Zeke and enacts the rumble to flatten the world (to avoid retaliation), Zeke and Eren have to die while they were Titan shifters so these abilities will not be transferred to random children being born elsewhere (this is potentially why Eren is trampling the earth and killing off Subjects of Ymir elsewhere to avoid the situation where his founding titan power after he died just randomly spawn in a new born child. Can you imagine if he's unlucky and amongst the 20% of the population left there were some Subjects of Ymir surviving in some remote villages giving birth at that very moment?). Also, this is important: Eren can only rely on the Ackermans to kill Zeke and himself, since both of them are powerful Titan shifters, and that Ackermans cannot be turned into Titans nor controlled even when Titan Life Source acts out (as seen in chapter 138 when it releases the gas to turn everybody into Titan).

Back to my main argument about Path Experiments to find out Ultimate Ending: Let's call Eren's plan to die in that way the ULTIMATE ENDING (UE). This UE is what Eren is after, and wants to find out, but cannot control because it relies on other people, especially Mikasa and her choices. This UE, before it is confirmed by Mikasa's ultimate action, is just one of many alternatives. In a technical way, it is activated by Key Moments that need to happen, and Key Moments are both presented by Eren's and Mikasa's Key Choices + other people's choices. When Key Moments happened and Key Choices are made, they align into a particular possibility I will call Timeline. In other words, I'm saying that the path toward this Ultimate Ending is a process of experimenting with Key Choices in certain Key Moments while the time allows in the path, and eliminating the unwanted outcome. So that means, every steps of the way, since Eren was able to use Founding Titan Power, he has been bringing Mikasa into the Path to experiment different routes.

The Timeline toward Ultimate Ending, let's call that Ultimate Timeline, follows Key Moments (of Carla's death, Grisha's murdering Reiss family, Eren et al became Survey Corps, Mikasa saving the little Yeagerist girl, Armin's revival, Eldian Refugees' Conference etc) and the most important Key Choice is this moment in Chapter 123:

📷

This Key Moment presented (at least) two choices: keep fighting or running away. In the story, the Ultimate Timeline was enacted when Mikasa said "family" and then whatever happens, happens (the one all the way to the end of 139).

So, Mikasa's reflection implies that she has exhausted all options and up to this point (in real time), she has made all the choices she could, INCLUDING this Timeline:

This timeline is shown In chapter 138, a glimpse into a version of Life in the wood, (I will call that Timeline X). People have think that Timeline X is a vision similar to that of Armin's in 139 - which I argue to be untrue. Chapter 139 is Eren's stories he told Armin after having been exploring all these Timelines and seeing that the Ultimate Timeline has to be enacted. The conversation between Armin and Eren happened when the Ultimate Timeline was well underway but in reality all the events haven't happened yet:

At this point, Armin was told a version of Eren's future memory (and Eren's deduction toward the Ultimate Ending) but his memory has been erased in order for him to keep moving forward. This is why in the path Eren said this:

He knew what he decided to do, but unsure about Mikasa's choice -- only that she has to decide. Note that Eren can only be killed in a way that forms a Key Moment constituting a new Timeline by Mikasa. So he knows he had to die but at that moment she hasn't made the choice, because

Reading chapter 139 and chapter 131 together with chapter 138 leads to my theory, that: the version of the story that we see (Ultimate Timeline) is the last resort and the Ultimate Ending can only happen when Mikasa proceeds with killing Eren thus ending the Titan curse. Which means in other Experiments she refused to kill him and terrible shit happened. Both Eren and Mikasa knew it, but they are patiently playing out different scenarios. (Aka no one knows better because the number of endings and actions are near infinite so they themselves as they live these lives also don't know what is going to happen). For those who have seen Avengers, there was that scene where Dr. Strange disappears in the middle of a battle to explore all the thousands of possibilities and go back to report that out of all, there is only 1 possibility that would result in them winning the battle, so it's similar to that.

To reiterate again: Armin and everyone else (Jean, Conny, Annie, Reiner, basically the survivors of the 104 crew) were given some explanations about what has been and is about to go down toward the Ultimate Ending of Eren's death -- which he hopes/assumes/expects Mikasa to make happen -- then have their memories suppressed until he died. Meanwhile, what Mikasa sees in chapter 138 is not Eren's future memory but her own. Timeline X wasn't a conversation but a reality that was lived in its full, as one of the many Path Experiments in which Eren and Mikasa were trying to find a way out of Titan vs Humanity mess.

How do I know that?

Visually: here Mikasa and Eren both have different hair (but Mikasa still has the scar, so this Timeline X is one identical to Ultimate Timeline all the way until Chapter 123 ("What am I to you") except Mikasa chose to confess to Eren, ran away, and Eren didn't choose genocide.

In this memory, you see that Eren's face was regular (with a different haircut and everything), but by the time Mikasa said "Eren, see you later" his face has the titan mark and the scar again, and that triggers the end of their experiment.

Her "see you later" here means "aight let's rerun this experiment and I'll see if I can do something else differently so I don't have to kill you." I assume that this moment of understanding comes from all the previous Experiments that they have explored together in hope of finding a different outcome, but everytime it narrows down to the same war and the options just become whether or not Mikasa will kill Eren. I imagine that in many Experiments, they get very close to the Ultimate Ending but Mikasa always chose to not kill Eren. They probably have lived out some horrifying realities and were like "okay this is not it, let's explore another one."

In other words, Mikasa, like Eren, did not forget - she has just been living hundreds, even thousands of years in the Path (2,000 years total probably since the title "from you, since 2000 years ago" and "to you, in 2000 years" might also be referring to Mikasa-Eren in addition to Ymir-Eren). They have been living many, many lives, with every Key Moments presenting an opportunity to explore a different Timeline. Let me be clear, in all of these experiments, everything is new to them as well while they were more or less informed by what had happened, as in they can only control their choices and not others, thus they also do not know if some shit's gonna happen differently this time because of some random butterfly effects. In this way, aside from Eren and Mikasa, you can think of literally everything else as not the same -- including the existence and decisions of other people, like for example Marcel lives and Reiner dies, or Reiner chooses to stay with them, etc, everything is brand new everytime they starts a new Path Experiment.

Let's go back to chapter 138. Timeline X was triggered by the Key Moment where Mikasa was asked "who am I to you" and her Key Choice "bruh let's run and live in the wood." You can say that everytime Mikasa has a headache, that's a Key Moment in which everything aligns to present different key choices that would lead to different Alternative Timelines. Every Timelines that they live, they hit a moment when they, as fully entrenched people in that reality, are forced to make a Key Choice that would determine the fate of Paradis Eldians. It's safe to say that they have experienced some of these outcomes and did not like the aftermath. Timeline X seems to conclude with Eren's death as his Titan 13 years runs out - and Mikasa dying alone in the wood. (She can go back and fight after Eren's death all she wants but it will not have an effect on the grand scheme of thing because Key Moments have run out and an Ending has been decided, not dependent on Eren and Mikasa. In other words, once a Key Moment was presented and a Key Choice has been made, if that Key Choice prevents the emergence of the next Key Moment, then an Ending is set.)

So in Timeline X when she said, "see you again, Eren" upon realizing that there is nothing else they could do, they start ANOTHER reality -- the one we are watching. It loops back to Chapter 1. For us, the beginning of this story, the first chapter, is the start of a timeline besides the many realities that they have explored, and it IS the final resort. As audiences, we witness THE ULTIMATE REALITY after all other alternatives have been exhausted. For Eren and Mikasa, they still don't know that this is the Ultimate Timeline until everything falls into place -- Mikasa was confronted by Key Moments, had to make Key Choices of whether or not she kills Eren, ending the possibility of reliving another reality, or continue to experiment.

In chapter 138, by the time Zeke was killed, Eren no longer has founding titan power, Mikasa gets a headache - this is a Key Moment where choices have to be made. The rumbling stopped - so half of the catastrophe has been solved. What remains is Eren, being tied with the Life Source. Jean blew Eren up, separating the Life Source itself from him. What does Eren choose to do? He moves forward, turning into his Titan self instead. The Life Source itself cannot be destroyed, so long as the Founding Titan is still alive. It released the gas to turn all Eldians into Titan, except Levi and Mikasa. This is when Levi said "the only thing to do is to kill Eren." Mikasa's headache gets worse - this is the last Key Moment in which she has got to make the defining choice. In previous experiments of Alternative Timelines, she probably had been here before, but never chose to kill Eren.

The next following pages is indeed her memory of Timeline X and her favorite one because in this one, she had made a choice to confess to Eren, while Eren made the choice to not committing mass genocide, and Marley is coming for Paradis' neck in a all-out war. Them holding each other is the last of that favorite memory, because in that timeline Eren dies peacefully, and Mikasa lived a long life alone knowing they left everyone to horrible warfare and slow deaths. She remembers this, wishes she was there instead ("I want to go back to our home") but that when that timeline concludes she's fucking back in the game again to find another solution. So this time, she made the decision that in all her previous timelines she couldn’t make: killing Eren.

Back to the memory: "See you again, Eren" - that was the last time she would say that. Killing Eren ends her time with Eren in the Path and there will be no need for another Path Experiment. This is it. When Founder Ymir smiles at her, that’s because Mikasa released herself from the looping of 2000 years trying to save Eren, the boy who was meant to die (You can see Lost Girls OVA to see how this plot point was iterated before). In return, Mikasa frees Ymir from the Path and the horrible curse of the Titan Life Source.

A note on the Life Source: In chapter 137, Zeke's and Armin's conversation touches on Life Source and its true mechanic to survive and to multiply, thus led to Zeke's nihilistic view on stopping reproduction while Armin argues that life exist in the smallest way that doesn't fulfill such functions. Happiness and content does define humanity in a way that mere existence, while define all lives, does not. In AOT, the theme of survival because one has been born onto this world is in juxtaposition with the theme of humanity and free will, choices, and the beautiful stillness of life even within unimaginable catastrophe. When the Life Source found Ymir the enslaved girl, she wanted to live, so it attaches onto her. And yet, wanting to live and living a good life are two different things. In a way, Ymir sees no reason to die (because to live is to choose life) yet she chose to "sacrifice" to save King Fritz. She doesn't choose death, but the Life Source gets transferred into other bodies than hers because she was eaten and forcefully extended into bodies that don't belong to her and choices she didn't make. In the end, Ymir was also held hostage by the Life Source itself and the Founding Titan that has been Born Into This World, existing as a physical body in Eren, so the only thing Eren could do in a way that ends the Life Source is to be killed by Mikasa. That's what it means by Mikasa was meant to be the one who kills Eren. She kills him because she loves him, and like Grisha told Zeke, "From now on, everything goes Eren's way."

Back to my point of Multiple Timelines and Ultimate Ending:

I don't think that there were only 2 alternatives, but many that have to be willed through "pushing forward." There are countless moments throughout the story where difficult choices were made by Eren and Mikasa, and they often have been at odds. It is because they have different end goals: While Eren's end goal is freedom for Eldian people, even in death, Mikasa's end goal was to keep Eren alive. The Ultimate Ending is that Eren has to die in order for Titan curse to end (thus releasing Eldians from the ability to turn into Titans itself, not from war or conflict -- because it has been mentioned multiple times in the story that conflict never ends amongst humans). Mikasa is the only one that can kill Eren, being an Ackerman who is destined to bond with Eren in his own lifetime, in a way that activates the Ultimate Ending. So long as she refused to kill Eren, the ending will be horrible.

So in all of these realities, while come with different courses of action, the death of Eren is inevitable - and Mikasa has to be the one who chooses it because it's literally up to her given

a) Eren can't fuck with her memory,

b) she was meant to be the one to save AND kill him at the right moment and

c) he wants her to make her own decisions about her life -- whether or not to hold on to him or let him go, she has to decide because even though Eren knows he has to die for the cause he still deep down wants someone else to save him, stop him, do anything outside of what he has to do on his end, you know?

Mikasa is aware of ALL of these alternatives, and just like Eren she was accumulating all these knowledges about what she was supposed to do, meanwhile literally wrecking her brain in order to find a way for herself to save Eren. That explains why in the very beginning, even as a 15 year old girl why she was ready to fight a whole army to keep Eren safe -- because in the thousand years of stimulation in the path, she refused to lose Eren every time, while knowing that Eren dying is likely the only thing she couldn’t change. So for her, life kind of becomes how to have the best ending possible with Eren throughout these Timelines in the path, and all her choices were informed by the fact that Eren will eventually die, and the only thing she can change is the condition in which other lives are happening surrounding Eren's death (aka when are how Eren dies). That's why when Annie was asking if Mikasa could kill Eren she was all reluctant, she was really out here trying to the bitter end to avoid killing him. But the choices were limited to begin with. So, the reason why she was reluctant is because if Eren dies in her hand, they will not be able to spend eternity in the path anymore, and the Ultimate Ending will confirm that one Timeline as, for the lack of the better word, reality.

In other words, the ending that we get in 138 is an Ultimate Ending because only this time Mikasa makes peace with killing him, goes through the act, which ends the Path Experiments.

tl;dr: Mikasa and Eren have been exhausting every single possibilities in the Path together everytime the time comes for them to be able to do so. It wasn't an imagination nor a future memory. They explored these experiments together, and eliminated all the alternatives on by one, until it boiled down to the ultimate outcome, which is Levi killing Zeke and Mikasa killing Eren after he enacts the Rumbling. This ending is inevitable, but it was not inevitable how they get there; Mikasa will have to make this choice, otherwise this shit will never end.

[beann-e]

um wow , idk what to say i’m a bit flustered but i hope i say it right. I was only gone for a couple of days and this is what I come back to. 😮 Tysm guys I love you all thank you for taking the time out of your scrolls to even follow me >:’) So, I decided to follow through on my haikyu x police force idea and here it is a sneak peek! I hope you enjoy !

May 1 , 2021

-recording take one

" I am under oath to tell you that everything being said here today will be used to further the investigation against yourself. That being said If you choose to answer a question or provide a statement I will have no choice but to write it down to be processed and turned into someone of higher authority than me is that clear "

" i'd say that's a bit — well stupid to me saying yes when your the highest fish on the food chain no? "

" what else can I say except lucky you that everything you say won't be passed around and relayed much less having your words twisted by those listening "

" cute "

" i'd say same goes to you if you weren't chained up in front of me right now — I might've just asked you out on a date "

" i'm free friday at 10 — though it's in the morning so I pose the question— Would you like to sneak me from my court case baby I promise i’ll make it up to you "

" mm i'll think about it seeing as though i'm the one escorting you to your new cell anyways we might just have to have a uh a talk inside hmm"

" what no balls ? "

" sadly none —or at least physically seeing as though i'm a woman "

" I never would've guessed if it wasn't for the way that suit hugs your curves — your pretty full out huh you must be fun "

" i've gotten that before though people tend to say i’m a bit more fun elsewhere "

" aw you wound me you didn’t tell me I had competition babe “

" of course not your first in line in my eyes, it sucks that the ring on my finger says differently though "

" isn't that sweet I might just have to take you up on your offer "

" oh? didn't think you'd be so excited ,much less interested on being the first one on my list to be put in jail but, I guess i'll try my best to speed your trial up for you if that's what you want "

The rooms silence was heavy as the camera panned the room. Your fingers silently being clawed into the table as it drained all your anger from you.

Your shoe tapping against the floor with a slight grimace appearing on your face when you heard the buttons on the camera in front of you being pressed.

" what no slick comment ? " A heartfelt laugh moved to fill the once silent room as you watched small hands wrap around the camera and fix it to where it showed nothing but your upset face—fingertips slamming down one by one on the table

" don't you have a fucking job to do glasses "

" aw what happened no more flirty y/n ? "

"your an asshole— I don’t know why I expected much in the first place seeing as though you were trained under him "

" such a foul mouth — you do know this is going on your transcripts right ? " the eyes in front of you narrowing on you the voice only coming out in mock care for your situation " you wouldn't want the jury — much less the judge reading this when their deciding your sentence right ? "

Your fingers glided over the table and into a fist in front of you as your head went to look down at the table

" you've grown submissive so fast "

" I find it hard to believe you don't like that kind of thing fucking pervert "

" aw you wound me — but if I had to supply you with an answer to your question— I can imagine your dying to know since you've been flirting with a married woman this whole time "

" married? "

" I know your observant y/n you have to be " the next words making you breathe heavily " I mean the way you noticed your s/o was cheating before they could even notice themselves is just wow"

The click of the door being heard as a deep voice made its way in the room " Kiyoko your not allowed in here "

" I have just as much right to be in here as anyone else — "

" but I could’ve sworn I just said you don't — so again why the hell are you in here ? "

The room turning cold with the woman in front of you straightening herself up not wanting to go back and forth with the male in front of her but, at the same time not wanting to come across as small, being seen as a woman down here was hard much less having your own husband be relatively close to the one in charge " I came down here to test out inmate 4890 psyche"

" did anyone give you that kind of permission? that kind of clearance ? to even get down here in the first place ? "

" I mean their hidden underground so i'd say their the main event down here "

" you can't just come down here to see it whenever you see fit "

" but I was interested in the way it's mind works "

" what the hell am I an attraction at sea world? "

" your whatever the fuck I want you to be " your once strong eyes were met with brown ones that held your gaze almost testing you— daring you.

You seeing the hate swirl with annoyance meeting to radiate off of him. His face made up in a snarl as he finally turned his whole body to you.

Arms crossed across his chest eyes now lazily focused on you causing a chill to move through your spine. Youd never wanted to grow submissive to anyone and you never had not in all your years of living so why were you now?

Kiyokos eyes moving from between you to the male in front of her and back. Her body already telling you she knew something was off by the way you'd just been playful with her until you felt the energy shift by someone elses approach showing how easily your personality could changed.

Something was off and she was interested

" if necessary I can always stay and play mediato— "

" your ok " he smiled widely " we're fine together — down here "

your body shifted in the seat wrists being pulled back and down to the table by the chain in front of you when you heard his claim.

" y/n ' s good with that — their fine ive known them a long time I can speak for them — we’ve done this before countless times this isn't their first crime maybe one of this stature yes but "

" mhmm " the woman in front of you shook her head lightly before leaving the room your heart clenching tightly when you heard the door click closed

" I just wanna do my job and then i'll get out ok y/n " the fake sympathy in his voice shining through as he put down his clipboard on the table before standing behind the chair at the table across from you

" god " his voice was heavy as he spoke " it's like you get hotter and hotter everytime we see each other " his body moving around the small rectangular table " it's such a shame "

Your body tensing when you felt him nearing you only to keep going past you.

Body letting out a breath you didn't even know you were holding only to restore another one when you heard the click of the camera turning off and powering down.

Your eyes darting around the room to watch him out of the corner of them reaching up to turn off the corner camera that showed the police force what was happening in the room

Not that they would care seeing as though he was chief he could do anything he wanted to you and not have to tell anyone in his unit. It didn't help that you were a world renowned criminal now you'd fully fucked this up for yourself

" crazy how your fucked yourself over " his words only confirming the thought in your head " you were only into petty crimes before so I could barely get my hands on you i'd always have to pass you over to everyone else because no one of my status ever needed to intervene — though I would've loved to— just to feel the way your face would drop anytime I entered the room or to even feel the shift in your attitude like I felt earlier— holy fuck is that powerful and now look at you "

He laughed at your body that sat slumped in your chair trying to cover your face with the cuffs on the table " pathetically sitting in a room bawling your eyes out in front of me "

His words only feeling closer now as his breath hit your ear.

Heat from his mouth moving to your neck instantly causing you to scoot away only for him to grab the back of your neck " have you no respect for yourself "

You gritted your teeth together at his hold on you " I said have you no respect for yourself "

You bit at your lip trying to decide what to say you always wanted to spit a comeback at the male but right now was definitely not the time with his heavy hand on your neck moving slowly into your hair to grip tighter

"ah every single time we do this — it's almost even more pathetic than the droplets I keep seeing falling and landing on my perfect fucking table that I bought with company’s money— fuck their gonna cut my paycheck "

His hand tightening as he spoke again " one more time asshole " his voice held all the rudeness to it " have you no respect for yourself "

" y-"

The action was quick as he slammed your head hard into the table in front of you. your vision blurring before he sighed blood dripping from your forehead and leaking out of your nose onto your lips as it trembled slightly

" ugh I hate when this happens with you —- you always bleed so fucking easily " he huffed " I ask you something you answer learn something about respect for once in your life and maybe you'll take better care of yourself "

He scoffed " your so fucking pretty and yet you do things like this — you slut yourself out in my business and then turn around and get arrested god your such a fucking ditz "

your head being brought to meet the table once again as you whimpered tears mixing with your blood brain muddied and shut down by his actions

" i'm so tired — so so tired of sweeping everything you do under the rug— I mean you act like I can’t fucking see you y/n i run the whole fucking thing I don’t— I don’t understand you your just fucking stupid so so so stupid it just blinds me and throws me for a loop sometimes "

His voice was low almost as if he only wanted you to feel the weight of his words " and then you never even say fucking sorry " he pushed your head down again " i'm the fucking cleanup crew ,, the shitty bodyguard when you drag yourself in some mess ,, the contact list when you need a plug ,, the boss when you need a job i'm fucking tired y/n "

" I know I know and i'm— im so sorry really please i'm sorry "

you braced yourself for another push as he backed away the heavy hand leaving your neck as he peered down at your head that was still hovering over the table

" what the fuck do you want another bash ?What are you doing "

" no — no please no”

" then bring your head up — god you seriously take your role on as the youngest dont you " he sighed as he moved his hands to pinch at the bridge of his nose. Your eyes darting to the camera kiyoko left and feeling hope enter your body thinking of how she would see the whole scene that’s played out with the male in front of you

" your not staying here "

" what—what "

" you can't — I dont want you here— i’m outta this your not my responsibility anymore your 19 now so I don’t know what to say except get it to fucking gether — you stay here your never gonna go to jail you'd just stay in a confined room for moths — fuck i’m always getting dragged in this shit "

" how — what do I do — what am I gonna do "

" the hell do you mean ? what am I gonna do ? as if the shits not obvious your gonna do fucking nothing while everyone else does all the work for you again "

your voice grew quiet as he scoffed " that's what I thought god — one day i'm gonna get fired "

your eyes darted to the camera and back down " for what exactly "

his eyebrows creased as he stared at you eyes moving all around your face before he spoke ignoring your question " you got yourself in some real bad shit this time y/n "

" but it wasn't even my fau— "

" you don't say shit — you know it wasn't suppose to go down like that and when one goes down we go down together you swore it— that’s how you got our trust don’t fuck yourself over again or you’ll be down in hell by yourself "

" like what ? "

" don't fuck with me y/n "

he moved to grab his clipboard your body lifting when he walked off and forgot about the camera only to drop the clipboard to the floor with a loud clang and start using his shoe to tear the papers apart

" wh-what are you doing " your voice came out soft as your eyebrows creased

His body moving over to the table and throwing the camera youd just put all your hope into someone seeing what you went through being thrown to the ground and stepped on harshly with the heel of his shoes.

Though it wasn't broken broken it was unsalvageable and couldn't be fixed your eyes going wide unable to process anything before he walked to the door and opened it his hand coming up to cup around his mouth

" THEIR ATTACKING " he screamed your body trembling at the way the table shook along with it " calling all units anyone in the vicinity the inmate I am locked up with is having a tantrum of some kind and I do not think I can handle it alone "

Your heart broke as you watched the male in front of you turn back to look at you holding nothing but hate in his eyes " I ask that you help me remove the inmate and get them out of our station immediately "

Several people running in cleaning up the scene and taking pictures before someone uncuffed you and dragged you towards the tall male by the door.

" Chief where do you want em "

" I want em on the next bus to tokyo "

Your head swirling " wh— "

" everyone exit while I talk to the inmate quickly alerting them of their next adventure " everyone moving silently to follow his demands his eyes going directly to yours as everyone raced down the hallway and away from you two

" your going to tokyo — I can't fucking do this — "

" but what would I do there's no one "

" go see bokutou — at this point you've pissed me off I can't do much else for you just — go ask for a new life really " his voice came out in a short laugh at his ending words

" boku— "

" y/n I said i'm pissed off and done with you — you keep interfering with my job and honestly this murder charge was the last strike for me— your of age now I can’t get you outta this shit— so if you could just get a new identity and get the hell away from me id seriously appreciate it "

" daichi I "

" you don't say anything "

" your my — your my brother we’re suppose to be there for each other and you "

" i'm not your anything as of right now you prick " his voice was sharp and held meaning as he snapped at uou " not your brother — your friend — your back up call when you get into weird shit I — I wanted to be a nice police officer and move my way up to chief I wanted to have kids a — a family y/n " he scoffdd " not a shitty sibling who keeps using my job against me and has me pulling strings that shouldn't even exists "

" but "

" you see how I keep cutting you off it's because I don't want to hear you y/n — you annoy the fuck out of me so seriously " he moved his shoulder to glide through the doorframe and past you "just go do what you criminal assholes do and get a new identity and the fuck away from me as soon as possible I want nothing to do with you "

" sooooo thats how you ended up with me " the air in the new room shifted from confusing to happiness as the dual colored male in front of you screamed " THATS AWESOME YOU HAVE SUCH A BADASS BACK STORY "

He jumped up and covered his face dramatically before he spoke "twas a dark night when y/n changed their ways and gave birth to a criminal — a murdering criminal who came to the one and the only — bokuto koutaro the amazingily cool , strong , funny , king of connections — thus creating a beautiful friendship and a dark and powerful villian story "

He smiled at your beat and battered face youd received from your brother a day ago before he spoke again his hair drooping slightly " too much ? "

[heresathreebee]

Dirty Water

Benny 'Borracho' Magalon x Robyn Banks (Black!OC)

Summary: Robb met a couple of shady characters calling themselves cops. Well it just so happens they are, and they're worse than she first thought.

Masterlist

Word count: 2.5k words

Rating/Warning(s): +16 Mature | kidnapping, mild torture, tied up, wanna be clear: IRL I do not condone hooking up with a person who kidnapped you or was complicit in kidnapping you, it just don't work out like that in reality

AN: so basically I'm gonna write and post this in whatever order I please, then go back and figure it out later. Since my brain has jumped back on the Pascal bandwagon, it's hard to focus outside of his body of work but I'm still coming back to this story with relative ease.

Just when she'd started to warm up again, a another shower of ice cold mop water was pitched over her head. Robyn sputtered and coughed, trying not to swallow the suds in her mouth or let them see her cry to keep the dirt out of her eyes. From the shadows that danced beyond her eyelids, she could tell the alleged cop who called himself Nick was crouching in front of her. 

"Last chance, sweetheart," the dirty cop said. "Tell me how you know Tony D'Onofrio." 

Fuck. 

Seven years ago, two federal agents walked in on officer Robyn Banks being sentenced to traffic duty. She didn't mind– she was fed up with the secrets her colleagues were forcing her to keep anyways. Maybe stepping down could help her clear her head, maybe give her time to compartmentalize those events and feelings. Only now could she say that the rest of her career was already out of her hands. 

"Those agents on that file? They approached me about D'Onofrio. Said he was my moby dick. Made a big deal about 'justice' and 'law and order' and 'the sanctity of the badge." Robyn spit more mop water onto the floor and continued, "I told them I didn't know what the fuck it had to do with me and they just sorta looked at each other." 

The blond man– Nick called him Z, she thinks– crossed his arms. "Quit jerkin us around, Banks, get to the fucking point." 

Nick held up a hand. "Easy, tiger. I asked for a story and that's what I'm hearing. Keep going, Robbie." 

Robyn scowled on the inside. "They told me he was my father. More like a sperm donor than anything, he probably didn't even know I was alive." 

"Now that is interesting," Nick purred. 

He cut the zip tie binding her arm to the rolly chair and handed her a towelette to wipe her eyes. She dared not reach for the tie on her other arm, lest her captors think she's pulling a move to escape. Instead she dabbed the sweat and mop water that soaked into the skin of her neck and face to pause and think about her next words. 

"That was the basis of the deal. I join their investigation undercover, see if I can get somewhere with my connection, and help them put one of the biggest crime bosses on this side of the coast away for good. In exchange, I get to call the shots, they'd put in a good word with my CO and elevate me to detective status instead of beat cop." 

"Thought you liked being a beat cop," the one in the silk flamingo shirt said. 

"Apparently nobody believes that." 

"So," Nick steepled his fingers beneath his aquiline nose in thought, "your end of the deal wasn't even your idea? How does that work?" 

"Sounds like she got something else out of it," the bald man in the white polo accused. 

Robyn glared at him, but she didn't contradict him. If she wanted to be listened to, she needed to stay calm. Stay calm, stay alive. Go home with the minimal amount of PTSD. 

"Do you want me to tell you what happened or not?" When nobody raised any more objections, she continued. "I agreed to their terms. Next I know, I'm climbing the criminal ladder, dropping bread crumbs about my parentage, two years goes by, yada yada yada, and then bam. I have a meeting with the heir apparent to the Italian mafia. 

"At that meeting I told Tony D'Onofrio he knew my mother and that I knew they had been dating around the time I was born–" 

"Conceived–" 

"Yeah that– he stared at me for so long I forgot how to breathe and then… he… believed me." 

A pin dropped somewhere in the empty parking garage. A dog barked wildly a mile away but could still be heard in the silence that followed. Robyn still couldn't believe he'd bought it either. 

"He just… believed you," Nick said skeptically. 

Robyn could do nothing but shrug. "I never got the details, I couldn't ask my mom about it and Tony never gave me any indication that he knew about me before that meeting. He just asked me what I wanted and did it." 

Nick dragged his eyes over her form, shivering and glistening, and then-- "what did you ask him?" 

Robyn felt her eyes gloss over as she tried to remember what mysterious force compelled her to say the exact right words. "I told him all I wanted was for him to know, to see him with my own eyes and know he was real. I said I didn't need any favors or special treatment. I just needed some closure." 

That was all. And the agents had been fucking furious with her. They had accused her of using them, of being a traitor and a spy for D'Onofrio or a mastermind cat-woman type villain and all manner of other terrible things. They were ready to pull the plug on the whole operation when Tony had offered her a better job. A job where she would come face- to- face with every schmoe on Tony's payroll. 

"Tony offered me a job 'running errands.' Not quite in his inner circle but higher in his ranks than I had any business being," Robyn said. "Most of the people doing these jobs were kids, easy to get around the city undetected and reliable. Now he knew I wasn't a kid but I guess he wanted to see more from me, put his best eyes on me to see if I was legit." 

Nick nodded and stood up (his knees popping like broken branches). He walked over to Murphy in the flamingo shirt and passed a few inaudible words between them. Robyn wasn't skilled in the art of lip reading, and failed to catch anything from Murphy except the word 'pointless.' It rubbed her the wrong way, sending a spark of fear through her that quickly dulled back into the numbness of being helplessly bound to a chair. She needed to finish this soon before she completely cracked. 

Nick returned to her side, chasing some pepto bismol with a flask of what smelled like tequila in it. "That's a very sweet story, Robbie, really it is. But… what I wanna know is why you're not in this file." 

"That's not what you asked me," she griped, then backpedaled into, "I'm trying to tell you why I'm not in the file. But in order to tell you that, I have to tell you what was left out of the file first. I'm getting to the point, I just… there's a lot of shit to sift through." 

Nick nodded like a patient father (yeah, right). "Just the good parts then." 

"Yeah," she nodded quickly, "just the good parts..." 

"The good parts, uhm. Well he did learn to trust me. I barely had to do anything just… let him try to kindle a relationship between us. I started calling him dad at his request, nobody bothered me or questioned me after that and I didn't abuse it, expect on the downlow giving info to the feds. He liked that about me– he liked me. We'd talk about my mom and he'd let his guard slip, started taking me to his meetings and asking me to deliver his important paperwork." 

"I let him think I was with him and documented everything I could for six more years." In truth, she had had some doubts. About putting him away and the vacuum of power it would create, about the dichotomy of good versus evil, about her career. In that last year, she had actually warmed to the idea of becoming a detective and getting to do work with her own moral backbone and not someone else's. "We made the arrest January 19th and put him away for a dime." 

Nick leaned so far forward in his chair Rob had to lean back. "This is the part where you wrap it up, sweetcheeks." 

Robyn gulped. "Gomer and Valentine pushed me out. They'd been acting really strange at the end, wearing these shit eating grins and looking at each other, and then they iced me out. Had me fired on the grounds that I was too close to the perp, used a fucking Christmas photo for evidence. There went the Italian mob's heir and seven years of hardwork, and I wouldn't even be mentioned by name in the case file. No testimony, no credit, just a dishonorable discharge and dumped on my ass in the streets." 

"Wow." Nick rubbed a hand down his face like he was the exhausted one. "That's quite the story, princess." 

He looked at each of his mates, every face stonier than the last. Especially the silent one's, the latino guy. Then he looked back at Robyn and smiled with a lot of teeth. 

"I do have some questions though, if you'll let me." Sure like I have a choice. "Now it wasn't public knowledge you were in on the investigation, but I find it hard to believe your dad's lackeys didn't know it was you who turned him in. And what I find even harder to believe is that they'd let you live for it." 

Robyn said nothing. There was a part of her that didn't quite grasp it either. When she had arrested him, when she'd slapped the cuffs on him herself and read him his Miranda rights, after the shock of her betrayal wore off, Tony had congratulated her. 

"I'm proud of you, kid. You may be a narc but at least you got your head straight. You got guts, kid." 

As far as she understood it, his last order as the leader of the mafia was not to harm her in any way. Nobody bothered her. They still knew her face on the streets, sent glares her way but never touched her. One of his underlings had come to her place and suggested she skip town permanently just to be safe. It was not a courtesy she ever expected from anyone let alone a man with a reputation for high profile robbery and murder. 

She didn't know what to expect. "I guess he really did love me." And Nick left it at that. 

~

Robyn was unbound, blindfolded, and dumped right back onto the street those so called cops had snatched her from. Her legs shook as she walked the last block to her place, utterly miserable and in desperate need of some sleep. Maybe tomorrow she could figure out what the fuck her life had come to. She showered (and cried) and picked up the half drunk beer from her fridge and brought it out on her front steps, taking a sip of the flat beverage and wishing it was something stronger. 

People passed below her on the streets, never once looking up. The traffic never disappeared but it did lull this time of night. She didn't mean to– barely noticed she was doing it– but she found a pack of cigarettes in her overcoat and lit one up. 

"Next time," she promised herself. I'll try to quit next time. 

Just as she was beginning to ease the tension that had been weighing on her all night, a man climbed the steps to her building and pointedly slowed down to a stop a few feet away from her. She chanced a glare at him and found him no stranger which was somehow infinitely worse. 

"Fuck off," her nerves got the better of her, "I told you everything, can't I at least get some sleep first?!" 

The man lifted his hands in defense, carrying a bottle in a brown bag in one of them. He was, well, he was the handsome one. The Cuban with the neck tattoo and broad shoulders. His eyes seemed a lot softer now Despite the dark setting. 

"Swear on my life, I'm not here for Nick." He took a single step up, waiting to see how she'd react, and when she didn't run, he took another and set the covered bottle down next to her before backing off. Still skeptical, Robyn carefully unwrapped the thing, revealing an expensive looking wine label. Dark red. "It's an apology," he explained with his hands in his pockets, "Nick thinks he's this big, clever actor but he can be a real bully when he drinks." 

Robyn gave him the 'do I look like an idiot' eyebrow and he had the decency to look at his feet. "We could really use your help with this, Banks. Nick forgot to mention the part where Tony was put on parole for good behavior. He'll be out tomorrow." 

"He what." That's just the thing isn't it? The case that ended her career permanently and he just got to walk off after only serving two years of his sentence. That was the real crime here. Robyn gritted her teeth, gripped the neck of the bottle and squeezed. She started shaking it like it was her criminal father, or the weasel federal agents who took her credit, or the dirty cops who kidnapped her tonight. 

Borracho looked concerned. "Do you need a corkscrew or– " 

Robyn shrugged off her jacket and looked him dead in the eye as she wrapped it around the base of the bottle and gently banged it on the porch step until the cork exploded into the air (along with a third of the bottle's contents but whatever). Borracho raised a hand to protect his face from the spray, and turned away to hide a silly grin. 

"Nevermind," he said, shaking the excess drink off his hand. "Listen, if he calls you about anything, please let us know." 

He pointed to the bag, which had a phone number on it. "Don't let your work be in vain." 

"You try that line on everybody?" Rob was feeling a little facetious in the face of mercy, over tired from the revelations, and pissed off by these fucking pigs. "Your good cop, bad cop routine needs some balance. Did you know I was kidnapped today? Now this wine is a start but you'd better step it up, good cop." 

He started to walk away but she called out, "I got Nick, Z, and Murphy. Clocked 'Gus' by the name written on his underwear. Which one are you?" 

"Benny," he threw back, and disappeared into the nighttime traffic. 

"Benny," Rob scoffed. "Cute ass." 

Robb drank the equivalent of two glasses, then passed out from exhaustion. She slept dreamlessly and tried to forget last night had ever happened. Benny, in the meantime, returned to the office where his crew was huddled around a phone receiver. 

"Don't appreciate you throwing me under the bus, B," Nick growled from his seat. 

"Shup up and drink this," Benny pushed the glass of raw eggs closer to his boss' hand, a so called 'hangover cure'. Nick shrunk back a little.

"Told you she'd be sweet on him," Z elbowed Murphy in the ribs and ignored his protesting 'um actually I said that.' 

"Wouldn't call her sweet," Benny said, grunting as he took up residence at his own desk. "She looked like a feral cat." 

Nick laughed. "Yeah well don't go getting mixed up with that pussy, B, we've got work to do." 

It was gonna be another long night for everybody. 

[ana-deaky]

London Boy || Joe Mazzello x Ben Hardy

Author’s Note:  Written for @borhapbois for the Bohemian Rhapsody Summer Event 2020.  I loved the prompts that you gave me and I really enjoyed writing it. I hope you like it too :)

Summary: Joe and Ben meets each other via an anonymous app. What turns into a fun conversation, turns into a friendship leads to something else.

Inspired by the song London Boy by Taylor Swift and a few true events.

-

Here we go...

-

I saw the dimples first ....

"You're making me smile", came the reply from Ben as Joe described how gorgeous he looked in the picture the Ben sent. "I wish I could see that.", Joe texted back. "If it weren't for the 5000 miles between us, I'd ask you out right now.", Joe added. "Really?", Ben asked. "Of course.", Joe said. "I could hug you right now.", came Ben's reply. "Same.", Joe replied, "What's your ideal first date?", Joe asked. "Hmmm. A classy meal and then maybe cocktails and an evening walk by the river or something.", Ben said. "Noted.", Joe said. "What's yours?", Ben asked. "Drinks. Dinner and dancing.", Joe replied. "Dancing, really?", Ben asked. "Oh yea. I'm taking you dancing. Probably won't be sober much. And that's probably for our best.", Joe replied. "I can't wait to meet you, Joseph.", replied Ben. "Me too. Hopefully soon.", Joe texted back.

....and then I heard the accent....

The quarantine kept them apart distance-wise, but the both were constantly in touch with each other. Texting, calling and an occasional virtual date until one day during conversation Ben asked, "What if I asked you to be my boyfriend right now?" Ben saw a smile creep on Joe's lips before he took a sip of the coffee. "You should ask me and find out.", Joe replied shrugging his shoulder trying not to smile. "Will you be my boyfriend? I mean it will be long distance for a while and...", Ben said when Joe interrupted, "Yes!" Ben's eyes grew wide, "Yes-yes?", he asked again. "Yes-yes", said Joe nodding vigorously as he gave that toothy grin of his. "We're boyfriends. Oh my god, I can't believe it.", Ben said excitedly. "That needs some getting used to.", Joe said still smiling. "Well get used to it, boyfriend.", Ben said. Joe gave a laugh.

....They say home is where the heart is....

Ben was woken up from his sleep with a series of text notifications, Ben rubbed his eyes and took the phone squinting at the bright light and saw Joe's name on the screen and a series of texts.

And then came a call from Joe and shriek from the other side, "Are you up?". "Clearly.", said Ben rubbing his eyes and asked, "What's got you so excited this morning?" "My tickets got confirmed. I'm coming to London.", Joe said practically squealing. "Oh my god! That's amazing. When are you getting here?", Ben said excitedly. "Friday afternoon. I got the hotel reservations and everything sorted out. And I have you to-", Joe said when Ben interrupted, "Hold on a sec. You booked a hotel room? No. You're not gonna stay in some hotel. No, you are gonna stay right here in my place." "But-", Joe started. "That wasn't a suggestion, babe. You're gonna stay with me and that's the end of it.", Ben said. "Alright I'll cancel my reservation. Happy?", Joe asked. "Very. And send me your flight details. I'll pick you up from the airport.", Ben said, "We're finally seeing each other. Oh my god. It's about time.", he added. "You read my mind. I'm so excited. I'm gonna go pack. Call you later babe.", Joe said and said, "Love ya Benny." "Love you too.", Ben replied and they hung up.

Joe: Ben

Joe: Ben!

Joe: Ben!!

Joe: BEN!!!!!!!

Joe: Benjamin

Joe: Wake up!!

Joe: Wake up wake up wake up wake up!!!

Ben: I'm up now.

****

"Are you sure you got everything?", Ben asked as Joe walked around his house while holding the phone in front of his face. "Yes Ben. I got everything. Stop worrying.", Joe said. "I'm just excited.", Ben said. "You don't say.", Joe said smirking and took a seat on the couch. "When is the cab getting there?", Ben asked. "In a couple minutes.", Joe said. "You have to text me once you have checked in and boarded. And call me or text me when you land.", Ben said. "Ben, you need to calm down. We've been over this. I got this and I'll keep you updated.", Joe said. "It's just-", Ben said. "I know Benny, I am excited too. And again, we'll see in a couple hours. Okay?", Joe told and Ben nodded. "Cab's here.", Joe announced, "Gotta run. Love ya, byee", Joe said and hung up the video call right after Ben said goodbye.

****

Joe collected his luggage and followed the trail of people towards the exit. His excitement and nervousness rising every step on the way. Outside the gate, Joe's eyes searched for his boyfriends and there he was, Ben, scanning everyone going in front of him until Ben's green eyes met Joe's eyes as Joe walked towards the exit to finally unite with his soulmate, his boyfriend. Everything was happening fast, it felt like the world was moving too fast around him . And what seems like eternity passes by the time Joe is in front of Ben and a moment passes before the two of them hug each other. Joe lets out a sigh of relief as the dopamine spikes. The two of them finally pulls away unable to hide their smiles. "Hello boyfriend", Ben says. "Hello yourself", Joe replies. "You know you're grinning like an idiot, right?", Ben said as led the way to his car. "You're one to talk.", Joe replied. Ben opened the car trunk and Joe proceeded to take his luggage when Ben held Joe's hand and told, "Let me." and let go off him. Ben could feel Joe's eyes on him as he put the bags in the car and closed the trunk and turned to face Joe who immediately said, "What a gentleman." with a hand over his chest. "Oh shove it", Ben said and moved around the car to get in as Joe did the same.

Joe: Landed

Ben: I'm right outside the gate

"Ready to go?", Ben said. "Yes.", Joe said putting on his seat belt. "Are you sure you're not forgetting something?", Ben asked as he started driving out of the airport. "I know exactly what you mean. And no, I didn't forget. I'd much rather talk to you, we can always listen to the song later.", Joe asked. "Wow. I am actually moved that you chose to talk to me over listening to 'Somebody To Love', than listening to Queen. You must really love me then.", Ben said. "You're unbelievable. Of course I do love you. More than Queen? Hmm let me think about it. Nope. But you're getting there.", as Joe finished Ben pulled over the car. "I'm just kidding", Joe said. And Ben started driving again. "So how was your flight?", Ben asked. "Oh it was good. Slept for the most part you know to balance the timezone and whatever. So, good.", Joe answered and asked, "What are we doing today?" "I thought we could go out for a drink if you're up for it or we can stay in and order something in.", Ben said. "Drinks it is.", Joe said. "Alright. I know a great place where we can go.", Ben said. "Perfect.", said Joe and started fiddling with the audio system of the car. "I knew you could't hold off for that long.", Ben said chuckling. "It's not my fault that it is a great song. It's a freaking masterpiece. And I know you know that.", Joe said finally clicking the play button on his phone. The car filled with Freddie's vocals as the two of them sang along.

A few singalong's and a drive later, Ben opened the door and carried in Joe's bag, "Welcome to my humble abode. It's not too much but you know that already from our video calls." "Like I said then and I'm saying it again, you've got a lovely home.", Joe said smiling, "Where can I put these away?", Joe said pointing to his bags. "I'll take care of those. After I give you a tour of the house. Come on.", Ben said extending his hand to Joe, which he definitely took and Ben walked around the house showing Joe around everywhere including the small backyard and finally they ended up in Ben's bedroom. "I've left you some towels on the bed. And you know where the bathroom is. I'll be in the living room. You need to freshen up after the flight.", Ben said. "Ookayy", Joe responded and Ben left the room.

A few moments later Joe went out to the living room wearing a khaki pants, white shirt tucked in and a navy blue sweater over the shirt. "Wow don't you look handsome", said Ben taking a look at Joe. "Thank you very much.", Joe replied. "Let's get going", Ben said hopping up from his seat on the couch. "Hold on a minute. You're going out dressed like this?", Joe said pointing at Ben's t-shirt and baggy jeans. "What's wrong with it?", Ben asked. "It's too home-y", Joe said. "Alright I'll change. Be right back.", Ben said and went to his room.

"Joe, could you get the door please? Joe!", Ben shouted from the bedroom as the doorbell kept ringing. "Joe?", shouted as Ben came into living room searching for Joe who was nowhere to be seen and finally opened the door to reveal Joe standing at the doorway smiling with his right hand behind his back. "Whatcha got there buddy?", Ben asked. "Oh this", Joe said bringing his hand to the front which was holding a bunch of red roses, "These. These are for you." "And I thought you weren't a romantic.", Ben said and immediately hugged Joe. "Can we go inside now?", asked Joe. "Why? Are you cold?", asked Ben with a puzzled look straightening Joe's jacket with hands. "Oh no. I think your neighbor is coming to get me for these.", Joe nearly finished the sentence and Ben pulled Joe inside the house. "I'm gonna put these in some water", Ben said taking the flowers and walked towards the kitchen getting the clear vase on the counter and filled the vase and said, "So my "home-y clothes" were an excuse for you to slip out, huh?" "Oh no. I actually meant it. Those baggy jeans didn't do any justice those thighs.", Joe said gesturing hands to Ben's thighs. "Shut it. You're embarrassing me.", Ben said his cheeks reddening. "What?? I'm just stating the obvious.", Joe said, "And as your boyfriend, I am allowed to talk about your thighs." "Thank you my darling.", Ben said face still red. "You're welcome. Can we go?", Joe asked. "Yea let's go.", Ben said and got the keys to the house.

The bar was right around the corner, so the boys decided to enjoy the London weather which was quite chilly but not too cold for them to walk. Ben, usually being the shy one, was talking non-stop about his neighborhood, Joe smiled and quietly listened to Ben's accent (which is to die for).

For a Friday evening, the bar was not too crowded, the boys took a step inside, Joe looked around to see a couple on stage performing "Purple Rain" . "Oh man! We're late. We're supposed to be singing that.", Joe said. "Oh no we're not singing. I'm terrible at it.", Ben said as the two walked towards any empty table. "Who's spreading these lies? Have you heard yourself sing? Because I have.", Joe said a taking his seat. "Wh-when did I sing? I don't remember.", Ben said. "Remember one night when, I told you to hold the call one day when I went to lock the front door. You were singing while holding.", Joe said and sang imitating Ben, "This thing called love" "I didn't know you heard that.", Ben said. "Oh baby, I always listen.", Joe said right before the waitress came over, "What can I get you guys?", the girl said making eyes at both Ben and Joe. "I'll have a scotch on the rocks", Ben said. "And we'll four tequila shots each with lime.", Joe said for which Ben gave an impressive sort of expression and said, "The fish and chips they have here is to die for. We're gonna have two of those too.", Ben said and smiled at the girl who was taking the order. "Alright.", she said and left. "Are you trying to get me drunk?", Ben asked. "No babe. I wouldn't dream of it." and the waitress came back with the drinks, "Enjoy", she said. Joe raised a shot glass and Ben mirrored the action, "To our first date", said Joe and Ben repeated, "To us." and they took the shot. And so it began.

Five shots and a meal later, Joe banging on the table, "So you are saying you have never ever ever ever done it? It's impossible. You must have done it at least once.", Joe said. "No not even once.", Ben said. "Well then you are now.", Joe said and stood up, "Come on." "Where to?", Ben asked. "We're going to rectify the situation right now.", Joe said. "Hold on.", Ben said and chugged on the leftover Scotch and let out a growl, "Let's do this." "Woo", Joe said loudly. The both walked to nearer to the small stage on the other side of the bar. "Mr. Karaoke Man", Joe said and Ben started laughing attracting the attention of the guy who was sitting behind a laptop casually jamming to the music in the bar. "See my boyfriend here", Joe said pointing both his thumb to Ben, "Never did a karaoke EVER." "Never ever ever", added a drunk Ben from the side. "Could you play..", Joe snapped out of the sentence, "Wait what would we sing?", Joe said blinking at Ben. "We'll ask Karaoke Man.", Ben said and Joe turned to the young man. "How about 'Bohemian Rhapsody'?", the guy asked. And Ben said a series of loud "yes'" and practically leaped onto the stage and almost tripped, "I'm okay", said Ben into the mic which he was given just then. Just then the karaoke started playing.

A roar of applause and cheers concluded the singing. "Benny boy", Joe said. "Joey", Ben replied. "If I could sing a song for you now, do you know which one I'd sing for you?", Joe said sinking into the chair. "Which one?", Ben said. "LIAR!", Joe said causing Ben to raise his eyebrows, "What you said you don't sing and you just gave a Grammy worthy performance. You know what, if Queen ever decide to do a biopic we should audition.", Joe said clapping and took his glass of whiskey. "First of all, you're drunk", Ben said taking Joe's glass away causing Joe to whine. "Second, I'm taking you home. Because you're wasted." "And you aren't.", Joe said. "You had too much. Come on off we go.", Ben said getting up and giving Joe a hand. Joe gets up and puts an arm over Ben's shoulder. "Wow you're pumped. Jeez!", Joe said squeezing Ben's bicep. "Ohh stop it.", Ben said walking towards the bar. "Ooh I'm paying.", Joe said. "You can't even stand", Ben said. "I'm good, I can stand. Joe's a big boy.", Joe said. "Okay big boy.", Ben said and Joe almost fell onto the counter, "Whoa!", Joe said holding onto the counter's edge and took out his wallet and gave a card, "Here you go". "Sir, this is an ID card.", the girl said. "Oops", Joe said putting back his card and gave another. "You're wasted.", Ben said. "No I'm not.", Joe said. "Or so you say.", Ben said, "Let's get going." Ben put an arm over Joe so that Joe could walk properly. "Next time, I'm ordering the drinks.", Ben said walking out the door.

The boys were walking down the street towards Ben's block when there was a crowd gathered right around the corner and music filling the cold air of the night. As they were almost going to pass the street when Joe stood right there next to the crowd. "Oh come on. Let's get those moves out", Joe said and started dancing. "Oh this is too good.", Ben said taking out his phone and started filming Joe dance around him. Few people from the crowd joined in on the dancing, making it more lively when Joe pulled on Ben's hand, "Come on. Loosen up baby!" and pulled Ben into the group.

A song later, the boys were back to walking back home with Joe still hanging onto his boyfriend's shoulder, walking zig-zag on the sidewalk. "Have I told you that I worked on a movie called 'Dear Sidewalk'?", Joe said rather loudly. "You might've mentioned it once.", Ben said, "We're here. Home sweet home." walking towards the doorway. "Can you stand?", Ben asked leaning Joe, who was half sleep and mostly still drunk, on the wall. Joe nodded and hummed, "Mm-hm" while Ben fished out the house keys from his pocket and struggled to unlock the door under the dim porch light. Joe kept mumbling something inaudibly while Ben was unlocking the door. Once Ben opened the door, Ben walked Joe inside the house and locked the front door.

"Let's get you ready for bed now, shall we?", Ben said. Joe spoke with a sudden energy, "Now we talking." Ben rolled his eyes and said, "Oh my god. Just sit down on the bed." Joe sat down as he was told and Ben knelt at his foot to remove Joe's shoes followed by his socks and threw them to the side. He stood up and leaned over to pull Joe's sweater over his head after clearing Joe's pockets and put the sweater on the chair beside. "Do you wanna keep your shirt on?", Ben asked. Joe shook his head sleepily and Ben started unbuttoning Joe's shirt, "Not how I thought this would go", Joe mumbled as Ben took the shirt off and threw it along with the sweater. "Okay I'll be right back." Joe just nodded sleepily.

When Ben reemerged to his room, he saw Joe sleeping on one side of his bed. Ben slid under the covers and wrapped his arms around Joe spooning Joe and Joe said, "I love you", putting his hand over Ben's and Ben whispered to Joe's ears, "I love you too."

.....But that's not where mine lives ❤️

-

Tags: @thosequeenboys @jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels @brinteylovesaliens @mazzell-ro @amethyst-serenade @hardzelloqueen @stewielover95​ @captaincoffeegirl515​ @detectivecutiepantsandhisbabyfox​ @hellysthings​

If you wanna be in the tags or be removed from it, DM me.

[supportanimy]

All Stars Verse - Hologram Boy

Synopsis : The coaches of #thatPOWER are angry at Panda for turning P2 into a hologram

Word count : 2803

Notes : Can y'all guess what the title is referencing? Please guess what the title is referencing

"We did it, we did it! We did it, yay!" The coaches sing and dance together in the new galaxy, after Panda traveled to all the planets and achieved the All Stars.

But just as they started to party, a spaceship arrived and out came three people, all with grey skin and white hair, wearing different outfits consisting of only red and black. 

"YOU!" The shortest one pointed angrily at Panda. "You killed our friend!"

"He's not dead, but he is hurt. And trapped," the muscly guy said.

"Hey, I know these guys!" Starships mentions excitedly. "That Power, right?  Or #thatPOWER, I guess. But don't you guys have four? Where's P2?"

"Here," the P3 drops a tiny machine, and a hologram of P2 appears. 

"Oh. Your hair has gotten...longer. And darker."

"Yeah, well as I was saying, PANDA MURDERED HIM!" P1 yells angrily and attempts to tackle Panda, but Reindeer shields them. 

"No, Panda would never do such a thing! They're too sweet and kind to! You must be confusing them with some other panda!"

P4 walks forward and pushes her friend back, but turns around to glare at them. "Impossible, there are no other pandas here," she explains. "Number 2 is not dead," Someone laughs, "he cannot die. However, he is permanently trapped as a hologram because of Panda's actions, and according to him, Panda was constantly taunting and harassing him just before that. Isn't that right?" P2 nods.

"Quiet as ever, huh?" Starships tries to lean on him, but passes through and falls.

"Then it must have been an accident!" Reindeer continues to defend their friend. The two had been close since childhood. One would know that if one played Kids Mode.

SS1, interested in whatever argument is happening, eats popcorn and shares it with the other coaches. "You know, *munch* Panda harassing some rando *munch* is honestly not that *munch* out of character for him." SS2 grabs a handful. "Agreed."

ME4 fixes his glasses, "Wait, I think I know what's happening here. Battle Mode, I'm guessing. Never got a chance on one of those."

"What's Battle Mode?" Rasputin's coach scratches his beard. 

Out of nowhere, Starships slides in to chime in the conversation. "A mode where coaches from two different songs go head to head in a dance battle! Only appeared in two games though, and I never got to join one," she pouts. 

Back to the argument, Reindeer gives up trying to defend Panda and is instead resorting to insulting P2. "He's just a robot! Can't he be replaced?!" the power coaches and BFT gasp.

P1 is now being restrained by P3 and P4 as she tries to attack Reindeer now. "I'm going to kill both of you!"

"No need to waste your energy on those lowlives, Number 1. We just need to get money from them so we can make a time machine and change the events of the battle, making it so that Number 2 wins instead."

Hearing that, HH2 gets a bright idea.

"We don't need to go that far, P4. We just want them to apologize-What do you mean no, Two?! Don't tell me you want revenge too?!

"Psst, P1," HH2 whispers to her friend. "Don't we have a friend with a time machine?"

"You mean Goddess? Does she count as our friend?" he replies before getting elbowed by HH4, who enters their talk uninvited. "I think she means the Backstreet Wannabes." "I mean, Goddess could probably time travel-" "No one asked, P3!"

"BE QUIET!" HH2 shouted loud enough for everyone to hear. 

"Ooh," SS1 directs his attention to her.

"So, #thatPower...I think I may know the ones to help you. Though, we have to fly there since...they're on the other galaxy."

"Sure! We appreciate any help! Even though I'm not sure what kind of help these people you're saying will offer," P3 agrees immediately.

P4 is a bit more skeptical. "How do we know you aren't lying to us? We aren't even sure what help we're getting."

"Some people with a time machine," HH1 tells them. "Like what you said earlier. I'm not sure who P2 is talking about though."

P1 finally stopped being filled with rage, and it was replaced with joy. "You actually have a time machine?! Oh, how I long to return to my time!"

The other coaches are understandably confused over her statement. P3 tells them to shrug it off, "Don't mind her, she gets like that. We're not sure why."

"So what about it, Two? Wanna time travel so you don't get stuck as a hologram anymore?" The hologram nods, grinning from ear to ear. "Great!" P3 turns the projector off and keeps it in his pocket.

"P3, I will murder you, and then dismember you, and feed you to tigers." "We-we don't have tigers. Also your arms are twigs." "Don't you act smart with me!"

"Chill 4, it's just a tiny mistake, NBD," the blonde woman remarks without looking away from her phone. "P1 hit my hand too, but you don't see me threatening him."

"Who the fuck actually says NBD-Oh uh, sorry for that."

"Yeah, but he didn't hit it hard enough that you punch yourself in the face enough to hurt!"

"How did that even happen? Like I said, your arms are twigs-" "Do NOT!"

Just as the two were about to attack each other, they heard the faint sound of an aircraft. 

"Hey, I'm trying to strangle someone! Can you not-" she stops her sentence when she sees a spaceship getting closer to the four.

"Get cover!" "Calm down First, it's probably just going to pass by us like airplanes." "No, P2, it's actually gonna fall on us!" he points at the ship landing fast. "Oh," she's pulled to safety by him, where their colour scheme changes.

It stayed at a steady pace going down, but stopped just 100 meters off the ground and slowly went straight down.

"Seriously? After all that drama?" "Hey, be grateful we're safe!"

When it finally finished landing, four familiar faces and four unfamiliar faces walked out.

"Hey look, it's High Hopes! And some Homestuck cosplayers!" the woman jumps back out from their hiding spot, which made her hair turn back to blonde. "That's not-whatever, I'm tired of your dumb ass."

"Dirty Bit Gang!" HH4 runs to hug DB2. 

"Wait, they have a time machine?!" HH3 never knew that fact. If he did, he would've begged to use it to appear earlier in more songs.

"Well duh, their song is called The Time, and one of us should definitely have a time machine."

"So I see you guys have a spaceship. I assume you guys are here to use our time machine, but who are they?" DB1 asks. 

"Hi, I'm the Starships coach! Love your outfits, but feel like the colours could be better. These are coaches from #thatPOWER, but one member is kinda stuck right now-"

"I hope you don't mind if we borrow it for a while," P3 drops the projector and P2 sighs quietly in relief. 

DB4 stops her punch to DB3 midway to look at P2. "Uh, is he okay?"

"That's the reason we're here. Number 2-" "PFFFFT!" "Number 2, is stuck as a hologram and we have no way of transferring his AI to a body so we were hoping that we can travel to the past to change the course of the battle that made him this way in the first place."

"Cool," DB1 responds, not catching any of that. "Say, why do you need eight people plus a hologram to do that?"

HH2 raised a finger as if to answer him, but put it on her chin instead. "I'm-I'm not sure."

"C'mon, it's easy!" HH1 tries his best to explain. "There's That Power, the ones who want to go to the past, Starships, the representative of 2014, We're here to-wait, P2 was their guide, I'm not sure why the rest of us are here."

"Okayyy, sure, we'll do that, but do you have a plan?"

Silence. "Yeah, we didn't think of that."

"Of course you didn't," frustration was evident in his voice. "Fine, follow me."

DB3 and DB4 continued to fight, while the eight were led to a dark room with a massive TV screen, and a few couches. There was a table with a flower pot on it, with some cookies and candy beside it. 

"So, it would be dangerous to just alter the past with no plans and no actual clue on what happened. That's why, we're going to watch it, then decide what to do," the bearded man takes the remote next to the screen and switches to different channels. "2014, it's a battle, correct?"

The screen switched to a scene on a stage with multiple monitors and the letters VS in the middle, displaying a dance floor with some other items beside it such as a chair. Panda rushed in and stood there while P2 slowly approached them, C'mon by Kesha playing in the background. When P2 was close enough, Panda started circling around him, then went back to their position, but not before blowing a kiss at the robot, which he moved his head to avoid.

"Oh, Panda blew a kiss at you? That should be a reminder," HH4 notes.

"What a shame," HH3 comments.

They began dancing, with Panda moving their arms towards their chest and P2 doing robotic movements. That was until just before the first pre-chorus started where P2's movements look like he was being controlled by a puppeteer, then they became more "free".  

"Haha!" Starships laugh. "Seeing such a serious face on a cute dance move is so-" As past Panda and P2 turned to each other, the lyrics sang at the part made her stop. "Oh no. Oh no no no no. Oh god no."

"Is she okay?" DB2's question had a worried tone. "She's fine. Probably," HH2 assures.

"There are 2 images burned into my mind, and I don't like either of them!"

The rest ignore her dramatics and continue watching the battle. The chorus played, with the two performing an all too common move, putting your elbow on your raised leg, but coupled with some pushing each other to the side in between. When the singer sang the song's title repeatedly, Panda is seen establishing dominance over P2.

"Uhh," P3's braincells, or whatever robots have, seemed to have been fried from just watching the battle. "How are you losing to a panda?!" P2 shrugs.

The beginning of the final round consisted of Panda taunting P2, and P2 attempting to damage Panda but to no avail. P2 looked like he was about to faint right before the chorus started again, with them repeating the same moves earlier. The battle finally ended, in which Panda brings out a button and presses it, turning P2 into a hologram while they laugh.

"Okay, that was way too far now that I've seen it! I'm going to join the others in killing them-"

"Yo, calm down. We watched this to help you think of a plan, remember? While it was very weird to watch, we can decide what to do now, or in the past," DB1 brought out a piece of paper and puts it on the table. "Write your plan of action there, then I'll check over it to make sure it's nothing drastic."

P4 grabs the paper and begins writing on it with her built-in pen. "What we want to do is to make it so that P2 wins this fight. I think that can be easily done if we change the music."

"But won't Panda just press the button either way?" HH1 has a solid question.

"Hmm, then I guess we'll just destroy it."

"Wait, if we're going to destroy it anyways, what's the point in changing the song?" HH3 is surprisingly thinking a bit smarter now.

"Oh, that one is to save his honor. And to destroy Panda's-!" P1 clenches her fist tight.

"Riiight. Right. Right."

"Yes, but how are we doing that? Won't doing that alter a whole lot of events now since he's the mascot?" P3 tries to think deeply.

"Not really," DB1 answers, having a braincell for once. "Since you're from the same game, and you don't have any future appearances besides that one mashup, I think you guys would be fine."

"That's it, yes? Number 2's battle wasn't quite complicated, so maybe that's enough. Sir?"

DB1 takes the paper from P4, and looks it over. "Goddammit why am I reading with shades-yeah, that's okay I guess."

"Great, now we can go!" P1 is ecstatic to finally be able to return her friend back to his original state. So is the rest, even if P4 doesn't show it.

"Well, I guess that's our queue to leave. Goodbye and your welcome!" HH2 grabs her friends to drag them home.

"Wait, but didn't you go by spaceship?" P3 doesn't know how they would even return.

"Now worries, this is our planet, we'll teleport home!" "We can teleport?!" "HAVE YOU NOT NOTICED THIS WHOLE TIME-"

"What about...her?" P4 looks down on Starships, who was still freaking out. 

"Well, since she's the 2014 rep, we have to get her gloves if you want to travel there and back-" "I CAN'T TRAVEL TO MY TIME???" "-Would you mind…?" 

Starships takes it off and throws it at the pink-haired woman. "Just, just take it. Heck, keep it."

"Kay."

"Alright, follow me again," he gestures.

This time, a room that looks like it came from a certain sci-fi franchise involving space travel, but not time travel for some reason.

"Ight, just stand there," DB1 points at a platform," and you'll be fine. Also, here are the gloves, just wear it when you're done."

"Thanks a lot for helping us," P3 did a polite bow, "we're very grateful." He elbows the others to follow.

"No probs, we do this all the time, just be mindful that there are some side effects of time travel-" "Excuse me-?!" "But they're harmless! Have fun!" And the three robots plus hologram go back in time.

They arrived at a weird green space. There was a door quite far away, and would take a while to walk to. They felt something weird, and looked at their hands and each other to realize that they became green too. Except for P2.

"Changing colours is not what I expected but…" P4 spins her hand around.

"Maybe this could be useful, since we blend in with everything else," P3 compares his shade to the space.

They see Panda coming out of nowhere, heading to the door. Without speaking, they all immediately followed them. "Number 1, go grab the button. Number 3, get there and change the music." "Aye aye, 4."

P1 gets on the floor and crawls to the panda, P3 rushes to the door, and P4 carries P2's projector, following them from a distance. 

The short woman finds a pocket on Panda's body and tries to find the button. Instead, there was a tophat, a tennis racket, a trumpet and a whole lot of other things that should not be able to fit there. Somehow, Panda didn't notice any of that. She finally got her hands on the button, and immediately destroyed it. 

The sound alerts Panda, causing them to look around, but not finding anyone since they all blend in and P4 had turned off the projector, and shrugs it off. P3 uses that minor distraction to enter through the door. 

Immediately after passing through, his skin changed again, now blending into the room which was where the battle took place. Past P2, stood there, already arrived, but didn't take notice of P3, who climbed the ceiling and found the sound system. He used it and changed the settings so #thatPOWER was gonna play instead of C'mon.

When Panda comes in to start the fight, with the remaining two sneaking in, the course of it had already been decided. Past P2 had started attacking them and charging himself up. The fight continued on with P2 having an advantage, and at the end when P2 won, Panda jumped off, leaving the room while P2 laughs then leaves from the other exit. In that moment, the room turned to a black space, everyone turning back to normal, P2's projector disappeared, and a blended in silhouette of him was there.

"P2, you're back!" P1 goes to hug him. P2 clearly had been confused by what she said, but accepted it anyways. P3 and even P4, who isn't very physically affectionate, joins in the hug.  "We missed being able to actually touch you, buddy. Now I don't have to kneel down just to fistbump someone." "HEY!"

"I guess we can go home now," P4 puts on the glove and they teleported back to their starting point. 

-

So as you can read, there's like zero logic here, but I'm proud of.it cause it's my longest one-shot!

[one-leaf-grimoire]

“illusion”

Chapter 11

Link to the Ao3 work

WARNING: Very Spicy chapter 0.0

Another warning: there is a *brief* mention of something traumatic that happened to MC in the past. It's pretty clear what happened even though I didn't state it explicitly.

"Hey! Oh- you going somewhere?"

After sitting in my bed for ten minutes, I finally muster the courage to get up and get dressed. I keep conjuring up reasons against visiting Julius right now, piling up like a huge mountain in my mind; but one BIG reason is outweighing them all. I'm going to get in so much trouble... can I really just walk in there after I embarrassed him earlier?! But, he's so yummy- YUMMY?!?! Shut up! Shut! Up!

Despite the argument between the angel and devil in my mind, I pull on my pajamas and a bathrobe, then turn towards the door. 

I don't care if I get in trouble! I'm going to take this opportunity even if it kills me. I've lived too many miserable years, so it's time that I do what I want to do... 

As soon as I push to open it, the door swings my way to reveal Alice coming back from the bathroom, and she's immediately suspicious. One look at my face after her question, and she understands, her mouth breaking into a shit-eating grin.

"You're gonna go see him again, aren't you?"

All hope of coherent response is dashed as I struggle to form words. "W-What if I am?" I finally reply, crossing my arms and looking away.

Alice giggles as she steps inside, closing the door behind her. "Good for you!!! But you have some explaining to do~" She pokes me teasingly in the side, earning an undignified whine from my lips. She knows all of my most ticklish spots. "I did NOT expect to walk in to see you in his bed last night. Also, did you see his bed head? That was so cute~"

"Yes, of course I saw his bedhead." I give up on leaving for the time being and sink back onto my bed. If I get stuck here for much longer, I'm going to lose my initiative. "I slept with him, after all."

"AHHHH!" Alice squeals and suddenly gets right up in my face. "Tell me! What happened!? How on earth did you get him!? Julius is, like, the crown jewel of men! I knew you had it in you but this is huge!!! How was it? What did his dick look like?! Is he better than Lawrence??!"

"Ah! Slow down! I-I can't tell you any specifics-" I laugh nervously as her questioning finally ceases. God, I wish I didn't have to lie about this... Maybe I should just tell her the truth? After all, all those attacks were just in my head, right? But for some reason, I can't bring myself to give up on the guise... just in case... "It was... er- good?" To be honest, I don't know what "good sex" entails so I can't get very specific here. "But... I mean, it's still sort of... happening..." I can't help but smile, my heart doing a backflip in my chest. Maybe tonight... it'll happen for real. And I won't have to lie anymore. "I went to thank him for taking care of me the other night, and he invited me to sit with him for a while... and..."

"You didn't sit with him for very long, did you?" Alice gives me a cheeky smirk, rubbing her chin as she mulls it over. "You're really something... I can't believe it. Elia is going to be so jealous once this goes public-"

"Ah, public? You know I can't make anything public right now..." The reality of the situation starts to fade into my happy, horny haze, Lawrence's scowling face appearing in my mind. "If anyone hears about this-"

"I know, I know." Alice takes my hand and offers me a sweet smile. "I need to be more careful about keeping my mouth shut... Elia is onto you for sure. I promise I'll keep your secret."

I let out a little sigh of relief. "Thank you, Alice-"

"As long as you tell me all the details!" Alice giggles and slaps me on the back a little harder than she had to. "Now! Go get your man!"

"Alright, alright!" I grin back and get back on my feet, smoothing out my robe. "I'll see you... later."

"Hehe, you better have a good time!"

With one last wink, Alice opens the door and shoves me out into the hallway, leaving me to walk alone to the officer's hall.

Oh god... 

There's no avoiding it now; my feet are carrying me right up to Julius. Once I arrive at his room... 

What's even my plan? Jump him immediately? Or try and ease into it? I guess I can start by apologizing for today... maybe I can offer to make it up to him? Ugh, that's too corny! I don't want him to think I'm promiscuous or anything...

Suddenly, I blink, and I'm already there. Julius's door stands ominously in front of me, a light under the door revealing activity in the room inside.

Here I am... let's do this... I can do this!

Sucking in a breath, I reach up and knock on the door.

Three agonizing seconds later, it opens, and my first reaction is to instantly die. "Oh, hi! I was wondering when you were going to come up."

Julius stands there, smiling down at me as if the event 15 minutes ago never happened, wearing a bathrobe that he's clearly not wearing anything under. It takes every braincell in my body to tear my eyes away from the bit of chest peeking out of the fabric (he's got a little bit of blonde hair there... it's hot) and back up to his eyes in a timely fashion. A moment later, his words hit me. O-Oh? You expected me?" Oh god. His mouth twitches, almost into a more smug smile, but it only lasts a moment. Was I that obvious? 

"Yeah! You said you didn't trust Alice, right? I didn't think you were going to stay in your room, so..."

... oh.

"Oh!" So, I wasn't obvious? Or maybe I was, and he's just teasing me now. Julius chuckles at my blank expression before stepping aside and motioning for me to come into his room. "Thank you..."

"My pleasure." Pleasure. His words cause a pathetic little shiver to run down my arms. I awkwardly walk over to the couch and sit down, my legs crossed at the ankles. Come on, stay calm! Remember the adrenaline from earlier...

I squeeze my eyes shut and conjure up the heavenly image I was blessed with earlier. Julius, soaking wet, in that little towel, towering above me-

"Are you alright?"

Oops! My eyes pop back open and Julius is standing right in front of me, hands on his hips. I stifle a little scream and quickly nod. Shit! Too much! "Ah- yes, I'm fine, I'm fine, aha-" I rub my face nervously, avoiding his eyes and every other part of his body. He doesn't say anything for a moment, but the silence is so heavy it nearly starts to suffocate me.

This tension...

It's unlike anything I've ever felt with Lawrence. Sex was a chore for me, something I had to do for him because it was my duty. But now... I'm the one who wants it. And I want it more than anything else...

Does he... want it too?

This all happened so fast, over just a couple days. Just last night, I told him my secret, and he accepted me wholeheartedly, bringing us closer together than ever before. Can just one day of this closeness escalate so quickly?

It feels so right... I'll be screwed if anyone finds out, especially Lawrence, but every inch of the universe is telling me to do this.

"Would you like a drink?"

"...yeah. Please."

We sit there together on the couch in silence, and I steal little glances at him every time I sip the glass of wine he graciously gave me. Once, I catch him looking at me, and we both avert our eyes as quickly as we can. The wine is bitter in my mouth, but feels nice and warm as soon as it hits my stomach. Slowly but surely, the silence becomes more comfortable, maybe because of the alcohol. My heart starts to beat a little fast, and I finally draw in a breath in preparation to speak.

"So... I wanted to apologize."

Julius looks over at me, his eyes narrowing with concern. "Huh? What for?"

"For this morning..." I shake my head, guilt starting to bubble up again like a hot spring. Hot springs... damn, I'd like to go to a hot spring with Julius sometime- HOLD ON. Don't think about that right now!!! "The Captain... I'm sure you must feel very embarrassed."

"Embarrassed? Not at all! There's nothing embarrassing about helping a friend out." Friend? Oof. My stomach turns slightly at the word.

"I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if you were," I answer, staring at my wine glass to avoid his gaze. "You took my side, and Hervey just... shot us down."

"...of course I took your side."

His answer isn't hesitant, it's more sure than any phrase I've heard before. I glance over at him quickly to see him staring pensively at the ground. One of his hands rests heavily upon his knee, and I can't help but feel that it's resisting the urge to touch me.

"I still believe you, you know. Hervey is an ignorant old man who doesn't want to face the truth. There's bad eggs in this squad, and I'm going to smoke them out. After you ran off, I went right back to his office and told him that."

Julius finally looks over at me, and his grim expression melts into that warm, gentle smile. Those lips, and those little dimples... they make me weak.

"Something terrible happened to you, and I won't let them win. You're... special to me. And this isn't the first time someone special to me has been hurt this way."

...special? I blink, staring into his eyes as he speaks. His friend who died... I wonder-

"I'm not going to give up on you. I'm with you to the end."

I suddenly become aware that, somehow, his hand moved over, and is now holding mine. I didn't even notice the movement, I was so entranced by his words, but now he's touching me-

My lack of reaction suddenly hits him, and his hand quickly lets go. "Ah- well-" He laughs nervously, a light blush suddenly appearing on his cheeks. "I mean-"

Without really thinking about it, I reach out and grab his hand before he can retract it all the way, and he freezes mid-sentence.

"... Julius... do you really think I'm special?"

It's inconceivable. Julius, who's basically a perfect man, a powerful mage, and vice Captain... he thinks that I'm special?

He looks almost as nervous as I feel as he finally answers.

"Of course I do... maybe this is not my place to say... I know you're engaged and all... but..."

His voice trails off as he looks up to gaze into my eyes again, where he can see just the slightest glimmer of... 

...joy.

I lean in just slightly, and he does too, mirroring my movement without taking his eyes off of mine.

We're going to do it... I'm actually going to do it-

But then, he hesitates, for just a moment.

"...your fianc-"

I don't want to hear about my fiance. I don't want to hear anything. So I cut him off by closing the distance, my lips hitting his to halt his words. Julius freezes up, a little surprised that I made the final move.

It feels like time has stopped. This room doesn't exist anymore. The couch doesn't exist anymore. All there is are his eyes, widened and staring back into mine. But then, finally, even they close, and I close mine as well, letting everything melt away except the warmth from his lips. An arm quickly wraps around me and pulls me closer, so secure and safe, I forget about all the problems plaguing me.

It's bliss. Ecstasy. My first kiss with Lawrence ended with him shoving his tongue down my throat, but Julius is slow and calm, his lips just barely moving against mine yet commanding them perfectly. One of my hands clutches his arm while the other slides up his chest, relishing in the strong, firm muscles there that vowed to protect me. The sight of his skin before made me shut down, but I feel oddly pensive now that I finally have my hands on him.

He's so...

"...perfect."

"Hmm?"

I open my eyes as he pulls back just a little, the word rasping out from the kiss. Julius's eyes crack open a little, and he smiles at me tenderly, one of his hands coming up to caress my cheek. "You're perfect... so perfect." I shiver a bit as his hand slides over my back before hooking around my waist. With one smooth movement, he pulls me onto his lap, our bodies pressed so, so close together. I open my mouth wordlessly as our hips slot together, and-

"I saw how you were looking at me earlier." His voice is suddenly right in my ear as he leans in to kiss teasingly up my neck, and I nearly spasm as his lips ghost around the shell of my ear. His eyebrows pop up for a moment at the reaction, and I feel his grip tighten. "Don't worry... the feeling is mutual..."

"...oh?" It's taking a lot to remain calm right now, opposing forces willing me to either go limp with bliss or start tearing away at him immediately. "I don't know what you're talking about, Julius~"

I feel the hair on his arm stand up at the sound of his name on my lips, barely a whisper. Without much warning, his hand suddenly slides down and grabs a generous handful of my ass, causing me to cry out softly and jerk against his body. I quickly feel my face heating up as he chuckles at the impulse. "You shouldn't tease other men while you have a fiance, you know," Julius whispers in my ear again, having turned the tables with just one movement. His words and touches are still so gentle, but there's a firm undertone to them, letting me know that I'm right where he wants me. "That's so naughty... who knows what I'll do to you?"

"Maybe... you'll do exactly what I want you to do."

It's the truth. Julius pulls back to look at my face again, an almost giddy grin on his face that's both cute and sexy. He's been waiting for this, hasn't he? Waiting for me... I can't help but grin right back. Without another word, our lips crash into each other again, more hungry and heated than before. Julius lets out a soft groan and unexpectedly bucks his hips against mine, drawing a small whimper. Ow... god, he's- oh- My mind starts getting fuzzy as soon as I realize that he's... really turned on right now. His kisses turn almost desperate the longer we paw at each other, one of his hands gripping my ass while the other closes around the back of my neck, holding me there as his lips and tongue just... ravage me.

Ah... this is actually happening...

I rub my hips down into his, which spurs him to suddenly pull his lips from mine. "Look at you... bad girl." He chuckles a little as the phrase halts my movements, and he takes the opportunity to grab the hand that rests on his chest and drag it down his body. "At least do it properly~"

I don't even have to look down to know that he's already pulled his robe apart. My eyes stay fixed on his chest, not daring to travel down his perfect abs as he guides my hand down further... and further...

"...oh-"

Julius lets out a soft breath through his parted lips, his hand helping mine close around his thick-

"You feel that?"

"M-Mhm."

Oh my god...

"What do you think?"

"...big..."

That's an understatement.

Another chuckle vibrates his chest, his hand gently moving mine up and down the shaft. As if he can read the worries that suddenly fill my mind, Julius's voice softens just a little bit.

"Don't worry, it's not going to hurt. By the time I fuck you, you're going to be so wet."

W-wet...

With a stifled groan, his hand starts to speed my movements up.

"Your hands are so soft... so delicate..."

My mind is going fuzzy again.

Fuck...

What feels like a moment later, I'm on my back, him hovering above me. I let out a surprised squeak, since I didn't even notice the movement. "Ah! B-Be gentle-"

I blink, and everything comes back into focus. Julius looks... concerned, almost scared? His robe is tied up again, and he lets out a sigh of relief. "Oh god... are you alright?"

"...what?" I try to sit up, but my head spins and I flop back down. "Wait, what happened? Did we-"

"You passed out, I think..." Julius's hand strokes my hair softly, his expression not changing. "You just suddenly went all cold and limp, and you didn't respond to your name-"

He keeps talking, but the words start to slur together.

I... passed out? What? Why? I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to make sense of it all. It was so hot, being there on his lap with him whispering those dirty things in my ear...

But...

"Hey, hey, don't cry! Ah!" 

Julius freaks out for real this time as tears suddenly bubble up from the corners of my eyes. "I'm sorry! I-I shouldn't have pushed you so far, this is my fault, please-"

"H-Huh?" Julius looks like he's about to start crying too, and I quickly come to my senses. "No! No! It's not your fault, I-" 

Wait, why am I crying? Why did I pass out? I wanted this so bad, but why was I so...

Scared?

It hits me a moment later.

...oh...

"Julius...?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you just... hold me?"

"Yes, of course."

Before I know it, his arms are around me again, holding me close, but this time there's no heated moments... it's chaste. Comforting. Safe...

More tears leak out.

"I'm sorry for scaring you like that... that's never happened before."

"It's alright. I shouldn't have made you touch me... it wasn't right-"

"No, no, it was right. I wanted to." I squeeze my eyes shut. "It's just... I think... my body just sort of... shut off..."

Julius is silent for a moment, his hand still stroking my hair softly. "...do you know why?"

"...yeah."

Lawrence...

The tears start to get hot. Bitter.

"My fiance... he's five years older than me... so I had to grow up a lot faster than I should have..."

I don't really need to say any more. I bite my lip to stifle more tears as the arms around me tighten protectively. 

"That's horrible..."

I bury my face in his chest, just relishing his warmth. 

But, Julius... do you have any idea how much you've helped? Just by being here?

"I'm so sorry. I'll be more careful next time, okay?"

Next time...

For some reason, my face starts to heat up with shame. 

"Right... I-I should get going."

"What? I thought you were spending the night here-"

"No one's gonna murder me in my bed, Julius."

I start to pull away, but his grip is much too tight. My weary, exhausted body can't muster the strength to free myself right now. 

"No, you're staying here. I can sleep on the couch of you want, but I don't want to put you in danger."

His lips press against my forehead for a just a moment, but it's enough to make my heart flutter. Such a brief yet tender gesture... yet more love than I've ever received from Lawrence. 

Love...

That word scares me. 

"Alright, fine." I sigh and pull away to scowl up at his handsome face. "You can sleep with me if you want... just please put on some pajamas!"

Despite the seriousness of the moment before, we both burst out into giggles, and I close my eyes when he leans his forehead against mine. "We can talk about all this later... but just know..." His hand squeezes mine gently.

"I'm very, very happy."

His words stick with me long into the night, after we both curl up under his covers for a long sleep. I've never actually slept next to someone before, but it's nice...

Yet, I can't shake the dread that laced this whole evening.

Please... I'm praying... let all this turn out okay.

I finally drift off to sleep, Julius's light snoring soothing my mind as much as his strong arms around me. 

To be continued...

Was this chapter okay? 0.0 LMK what you think!

[garden-of-succulents]

I'm really enjoying the ASG story

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(Content notes: overdose/suicide mention, discussion of the mental health issues of a third party not present, discussion of being closeted/coming out and biphobia)

Andy feels sorry for the Bittle kid, or else she’s looking for a fight; either way, she finds him again at a new, emptier table, and sits next to him as the lunch crowd trickles out. He eyes her warily across the stretch of tablecloth.

“So,” she says, “I’m just double-checking, the… thing you discussed last night at dinner. I didn’t hear the end of that conversation. I’m presuming it’s something you wanted everyone there to keep confidential?”

“Yes,” he says, after careful consideration of her motives.

“Cool,” she says, and takes a drink of water. “I didn’t know if you had a plan or  media strategy or anything. It’s hard for me to be helpful if I don’t know.”

“Why would you help?” he asks, the cadence of the sentence making it sound like there was supposed to be an us on the end of it, thought better of just before it came out.

She shrugs. “Kent and I have a plan. We’re committed to the sport as a whole. Making it a less sexist, homophobic, racist place. Doing outreach to people who’ve been excluded. It kind of seems like part of the same thing.”

Bittle’s eyes are moving, taking in the last lingering diners, the staff moving between the tables clearing off the remains of lunch. “Do we have to talk about this in public?”

“I dunno. Do you wanna go somewhere more private and talk about it?”

She’s expecting him to say no, that he doesn’t want to talk about it at all, but something dampens his hostility and wariness and he tilts his head a little. “Sure, if you know somewhere. I wanna stick around a bit to watch practice.”

“I know just the place,” she says. “Follow me.”

The luxury box technically belongs to a Preds fan of Serge’s acquaintance; he and his extremely rich friends have alternate plans for the weekend, so he’s offered it as a private refuge for Serge’s friends. Mary and Andy have been using it as a nap room, though they’ll probably go back to the family section to watch the main event.  

It’s clever, Andy thinks. For all that this man has lost out by not using expensive seating for the All-Star Game, he’s gained by ingratiating himself to several of the players there. She’s pretty sure that was his plan, at least; Mary’s half-serious sweep for recording devices before taking off her bra had come up empty.

“We may be interrupted,” she tells Bittle, carding her way into the room, “but we’ll hear them come in.”

He climbs crosslegged into an armchair as she takes the sofa, reminding her for a minute of an offended tabby cat. The ice is still empty. 

“Kent postponed coming out because of Jack,” Andy says, breaking the stalemate. “I’ve known him five years now and the entire time he’s been like, ‘I can’t come out, people will speculate and it’ll make his rookie year harder’.”

“Bravo for him,” Bittle says. “That gonna change when Jack’s rookie year is over?”

“Probably,” Andy shrugs. “It won’t make as much of a splash now as when he was dating a teammate. A lot of people think ‘bi’ means ‘basically straight’. But we’re working with a couple LGBT initiatives when it might be natural for it to come out, and he’s probably going to stop hiding it.”

Bittle digests this. Then he blurts out, “He came to Samwell last year. To talk to Jack.”

“Yeah, he did,” Andy says, sighing. “He sure did.”

“I was there. He said some awful things to Jack–that he was worthless, that nobody cared about him, that he was a disappointment to his father. I heard him.”

Andy gestures with a hand and says, “You see why I’m not so crazy about Jack renewing contact with him?”

Bittle stops, peers at her. “You don’t sound surprised at that. Is he… like that all the time?”

Good god, he looks concerned.  “It’s… a thing he struggles with. I’ve seen him do it at other people. And I talked with him the morning after he went to Samwell, got his version of the story and talked him into not jumping off a bridge.”  And now Bittle looks slightly horrified. “Look, a lot of Kent’s fucked-upness… has to do with Jack. And he was having a really rough time before he went there. It’s kinda why he went. Guy on the team he was dating snapped his hamstring, will never play hockey again. Two friends retire. New guy gets traded. Next guy gets sent down. Eventually he just thought, if they want a new centre so bad, he should go talk to Zimmermann about signing on early.”  She sighs.  “But yeah, I woke up the next day to a text all, ‘Well, I made Zimms hate me for good now’.”  Andy shrugs her shoulders, trying to dispell tension. “In a way it was kind of a good thing. He gave up his idea that somehow getting the perfect team back together was gonna fix things for him, and focused on the things he actually could control, like his own mental health.”

What’s weird is, her mouth tastes like tears. What feels weird is, she was cool and calm that day, helping Kent like a pro, and the sadness of it never hit her until now.

“So I’d really appreciate it,” she adds, “if Jack could... not waltz back in and blow his peace of mind to shreds again. We just got it back together.”

“What’s got him so... messed up so bad, over Jack?” Bittle asks, like he’s getting it for the first time.

There’s a long answer.  There’s a short answer. There’s the years of therapy answer. And a lot of them she doesn’t think someone with so much power to hurt Kent deserves to know; Bittle’s boyfriend will have to do a lot to earn Andy’s trust.

“I think,” she says carefully, “that having his best friend, who he loved most in the world, attempt suicide on him without warning or explanation, and then break up with him, and then stop talking to him, kind of... did a number on him.”

Bittle stares at her for a moment, then says, “Jack didn’t attempt suicide.”

Andy blinks. Hard. “Excuse me?”

“The overdose. Before the draft. It was an accident. He was drunk and messed up his dosage. It wasn’t on purpose.”

Andy gets off the couch before she’s actually aware she’s doing it. Forward momentum brings her closer to Bittle, which she doesn’t want, so she turns and paces back, leans her balled fists against the wall.  She doesn’t exactly feel like crying but she wishes, as she presses her forehead against them, that the human body had some other means of venting frustration and rage.

She can even guess how it happened, too: It wasn’t your fault, Kenny mistranslated into You weren’t important when it was meant as It was an accident.

“He could have said so,” she says. The words are pale and weak. From the helpless gesture Bittle makes, he knows what feeling would have gone into those words if she’d been capable.

She goes back to leaning her head against her hands and Bittle says, “I’ll... I’ll talk to Jack, okay? I don’t... I understand your concerns.”

“Thanks,” she says tonelessly.  She allows herself not to look up as Bittle gets up off his chair and sidles out of the room.