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illuminatedquill · 3 years

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Extracurricular, An Analysis

Oh Ji-soo and Bae Gyu-ri

“Love is the ultimate outlaw. It just won’t adhere to any rules. The most any of us can do is sign on as it’s accomplice.” - Tom Robbins

You know the story. You’ve heard it before, right?

Boy meets girl.

Girl finds out that boy is running a side protection business for prostitutes.

Girl decides to blackmail boy into letting her join his business.

Classic high school criminal shenanigans ensue leading them into more dangerous situations where they are forced to make desperate decisions to stay alive.

Oh, and they fall in love along the way.

Oh? You haven’t heard this one before? Then let me introduce you to this delightful kdrama called Extracurricular.

I watched this one while waiting for the newest Hometown Cha Cha Cha episodes to drop and ended up binging the whole series in two days. There are many remarkable parts of this series: it’s a crime drama, first and foremost, that showcases high school teenagers caught in a cycle of violence and crime, abandoned by the society and adults that are supposed to be protecting them. There are no clear good guys and bad guys in this drama; everyone is cast in shades of grey. Our main leads, Oh Ji-soo and Bae Gyu-ri, run the prostitution business, and are both from broken family backgrounds. Their actions are morally questionable at best, but the top tier performances from Kim Dong Hee (you might remember him from Itaewon Class) and Park Ju Hyun make you cheer for them anyway. You want them to have a happy ending, despite the horrible things they do. The audience is always reminded that despite how clever they are in staying ahead, their actions have consequences, and they’re just high school kids. The drama never pulls it punches.

But, weirdly enough, it’s also a love story. And that’s the part the really sticks with me until now. (The chemistry between the main leads is absolute dynamite and I could watch ten episodes of them just verbally sparring with each other. They don’t even kiss. They’re that fantastic when together on screen.)

I’m writing this because this is undoubtedly one of my all time favorite kdramas and I have a lot of feelings about our main pairing, Ji-soo and Gyu-ri. I can’t call them a couple (wait, didn’t I just say they fall in love) because their relationship can’t be labelled simply as that. Think of it as something similar to the main leads in My Ahjussi. Two people who should have become soulmates, yet met at the wrong time.

This kdrama is not particularly happy, and while I do encourage people to watch this, I am warning that the subject matter is extremely dark. If you’re sensitive to scenes depicting sexual assault, graphic violence, or anything in that zip code you’ll want to steer clear.

Also, I’ll be diving into spoiler territory in this analysis. So if you want to go in clean, then stop reading here.

Still here? Awesome. Let’s dive deep into the messy, amazing pairing that is Oh Ji-soo and Bae Gyu-ri. First, let’s do a brief character background on our two main leads, starting with Ji-soo.

Oh Ji-soo is one half of our main pairing and this story starts with him. He lives by himself and has been essentially abandoned by his only parents; his father is a failed businessman who gambles whatever money he acquires on scams and his mother ran away. His apartment is small, sparse, but functional. He owns only a few outfits aside from his school uniform. The only unique item he owns is a pet hermit crab that he takes care of. His life outside of school is non-existent; he has no friends, no one to hang out with and do typical high school teenager activities with. He takes care of himself and lives only for himself and his “dream”: to graduate, attend college, get married, and have kids like a normal person.

But to do that, he needs a large amount of money. He has no other financial means to do so (his father is largely absent, as is his mother), so he decides, at some point, to start up this protection business for prostitutes. The drama doesn’t go into detail about the how and why he came to this conclusion that this was the best way to make a lot of money in a short amount of time, so you’ll have to suspend your disbelief from the get go. Considering the themes of the story (how youths abandoned by society tend to act out in extreme ways to make it in this world), it’s not hard to believe his desperation would drive him to make such a decision.

Ji-soo, despite his shady business, is actually a decent person. There’s a streak of humanity that exists inside him that refuses to go out, despite the increasingly dark and bleak events that start to overtake his life. He’s attached to his hermit crab, cares for his “employees” outside of them being tools to make him money, and doesn’t want to see anyone get hurt. He goes above and beyond what’s required to help out people at the risk of his own life (in particular, Gyu-ri, and we’ll get into that shortly).

What we learn from the first few episodes is that Oh Ji-soo is extremely smart and methodical in how he approaches his life. At school, he is known as a model student - quiet, top of the class in terms of grades, doesn’t draw any attention to himself, always follows along with what the teachers ask of him. Only his homeroom teacher, Mr. Cho, seems to consider his quiet style of existence to be concerning and tries to make him less socially awkward by pairing him up with another student in a new extracurricular club. This leads to the introduction of Bae Gyu-ri, Ji-soo’s longtime crush and future partner-in-crime.

Meet Bae Gyu-ri, the other half of our dynamic duo. Her introduction into the story kickstarts the entire plot, as one of her earliest actions leads to a domino effect that spells increasing doom and tragedy for our main leads. She messes with Ji-soo’s operation at a critical moment and she spends the rest of the drama doing her best to make up for the consequences that follow.

In my personal opinion, she is probably the best main female lead I’ve ever seen in a kdrama. Hands down, no other character exists (currently) that rivals her sheer cunning, wit, and badassery. Gyu-ri is Crazy, capital C, and is the chaos to Ji-soo’s control; the fire to his ice. Despite being the direct cause of half the events that happen to Ji-soo in the drama, he can’t help but need her because of what she offers. They make an incredible team. Her competitiveness, her need to win no matter the odds, helps them survive time and time again.

Gyu-ri is from the opposite end of the spectrum of Ji-soo; he’s dirt poor and she’s insanely rich (always nice to see a reversal of typical kdrama tropes). Her mother and father run a successful entertainment company. Gyu-ri is popular at school, friends with seemingly everybody, pretty, cheerful and gets along well with her teachers. Ji-soo, and the audience, believe from the beginning that she has the perfect life. It’s not hard to believe that she’s just involving herself in Ji-soo’s business because she’s bored and needs an outlet, at first.

We soon learn otherwise. Gyu-ri has more in common with Ji-soo than he initially realizes, in that they’re both trapped in circumstances beyond their control - it’s just that Gyu-ri’s cage is gilded, whereas his is not. Her parents are strict and have her life planned out for her, all without her consent or input, leaving her feeling frustrated and powerless despite her rich lifestyle. A suicide attempt hasn’t done much to change her parents attitude towards her, only serving to further their control over her life.

So, when she learns of Ji-soo’s operation she immediately seeks to angle her way into it. First, she tries to rip him off, believing that he’s an evil “pimp” and thus deserves it. But after spending some time with him, she changes her mind last second and decides to help him out instead.

And, now, let’s get into their relationship, which is one of the best (if not the best) aspect in the entire series.

I need to be upfront about something: the relationship between Ji-soo and Gyu-ri is not exactly healthy. I wouldn’t describe it as toxic - the circumstances surrounding them aren’t exactly the best environment to encourage open and honest communication - but it’s definitely not what should be considered ideal, especially for young adults, and especially for young adults who are dabbling in crime instead of studying.

So, why do I love them so much? If you’ve read some of my previous posts, you know that I loathe toxic relationships in kdramas, so I understand if you think I’m coming off as hypocritical here. Why do I like Oh Ji-soo and Bae Gyu-ri when I didn’t like, for example from recent history, (oh boy, here I go again on my Nevertheless BS) Park Jae-eon and Yu Na-bi?

First, Ji-soo and Gyu-ri are way cooler than Jae-eon and Na-bi ever could be. They run a criminal enterprise that involves having a high amount of intelligence, cunning, and daring to do so. Do Jae-eon and Na-bi run a criminal enterprise as a side business? No, they don’t, because they’re boring art students.

Secondly, Ji-soo and Gyu-ri actually progress in their relationship and change their views as they learn from each other. Now, granted, that progress isn’t towards becoming better versions of each other - quite the opposite. But at least they have progress. Jae-eon and Na-bi stayed in the same stupid cycle for the whole series and then decided that it was better staying that way as opposed to trying for something else.

Last, but certainly not least, Ji-soo and Gyu-ri are actually interesting to watch for me. The chemistry between Park Ju Hyun and Kim Dong Hee is explosive and they way they spar, exchange looks, and just generally exist around each other on screen is something I can watch forever. I’ve said this before but Han So Hee and Song Kang’s on screen chemistry, outside of their intimate scenes, really didn’t impress me.

Okay, back to Extracurricular. This relationship, man. It’s all I can think about (other than HomeCha’s Du-sik and Hye-jin, but that’s another post). Ji-soo and Gyu-ri are so good together.

I’ve noted before that Ji-soo is methodical in how he approaches his life; he plans out everything ahead, and rigs any situation as much as he can in his favor. It’s brilliant, but when a crisis happens, he doesn’t know how to deal with it effectively. He panics and flounders; becomes indecisive at a time when clear, decisive action is required.

Enter Gyu-ri. She quickly becomes the partner he never knew he needed. When there’s a situation, she becomes invaluable in her quick thinking and wit, coming up with solutions on the fly. It’s not perfect, but it keeps them just one small step ahead of whatever is coming their way.

The only thing preventing them from becoming unstoppable is the lack of communication and trust they have with each other. A lot of that has to do with how Gyu-ri entered Ji-soo’s business - she blackmailed him first, and, when that failed, she strong armed her way into getting him to accept her help. It’s implied in the drama that Ji-soo has had a crush on Gyu-ri for a while (since ninth grade, I believe) and in the first episode he actually gets the chance to spend time with her outside of school on a sort of quasi-date.

It goes sideways pretty quickly because of some shenanigans from his business, but not before she gets to know him and says some pretty touching words regarding his situation. Poor guy is head over heels - even after finding out that she’s the one blackmailing him, his feelings are only dampened, not extinguished. When he catches a glimpse of her family’s situation, he gains a deeper understanding of her and why she acts the way she does. Even more importantly, Ji-soo treats her the same after finding out this information which, to someone like Gyu-ri, means more than if he comforted her about it.

If you want to see a physical representation of how he feels, other than paying attention to his actions, you can see it in him keeping mementos from Gyu-ri. She has an interesting habit of folding bags into origami shapes and giving it to him. Even after the blackmail reveal, you can see that he continues to keep these in a container on his desk. It’s really cute that he keeps these, when it probably doesn’t even matter that much to Gyu-ri.

Towards the end of the drama, Ji-soo prepares to turn himself in to prevent Gyu-ri from being implicated in the crimes they committed. And it costs him almost everything to protect her. Ji-soo, the quiet, nerdy kid, puts himself on the line time and time again to protect Gyu-ri, knowing that it puts his life and his dream at risk to do so. And all for what? For some girl that he thinks doesn’t even like him in return?

Well, let’s talk about that. Because I’ve seen some comments that Gyu-ri was only using Ji-soo for her own selfish gain. And I can agree that was how it was at the beginning for her; she definitely was only interested in acquiring money, like Ji-soo was, in order to achieve her own goal of being free from her parents.

But, oh man, that is not what is motivating her at the end.

It’s actually pointed out relatively early by some of her friends that it’s obvious that she likes Ji-soo more than he likes her. Understandably Ji-soo is keeping her at arms length from him given the whole recent blackmailing, so it would make sense that it looks that way.

Further questioning reveals what she likes the most about him:

“It’s not like I’m crazy about him. He’s fun. And amusing. He’s smart. And there’s a certain charm he has. He also has a wolfish side to him. But he thinks he’s a puppy.”

- Bae Gyu-ri

But, as she gets to know Ji-soo better, you can certainly see that she starts to fall hard for him. As a cover story for why they hang out so much together during and after school, Gyu-ri states to everyone that they’re dating. The reactions across the school definitely imply that this is a shocking development, which means that Gyu-ri hasn’t dated anyone before. So why Ji-soo other than the reasons she herself states?

He challenges her, just as she challenges him. Gyu-ri may be the more dynamic, quick thinking of the pair but Ji-soo is every inch her intellectual equal - just in different ways. She doesn’t seem to be the type to be easily impressed, but you can tell that she’s definitely impressed by Ji-soo’s operation and how thoroughly set up it is. When Ji-soo is frustrated at the beginning by his setbacks, he blows up at another student (knocks him out in a crazy punch) and immediately walks over to Gyu-ri afterwards (who saw the whole thing) to inform her that she is now his partner in crime.

The look in her eyes, and the small smirk she has speaks volumes about her attraction to him in that scene. Smoldering.

And, oh yes, she’s prone to jealousy. Another classmate, Min-hee, gives Ji-soo a present out of the blue (it was supposed to be for her boyfriend, Ki-tae, but that’s another sub-plot) - all within view of Gyu-ri. It’s hilarious how she tries to brush it off. Later, for plot reasons, Ji-soo has to spend more time with Min-hee which only furthers Gyu-ri’s annoyance.

And her motivations stop being entirely about the money and more towards helping preserve the dream that she and Ji-soo share about being free. There’s a scene in episode 8 where it’s revealed that, due to a business partnership with a local gang (set up by none other than Gyu-ri herself in a desperate move), Ji-soo would have to drop out of school permanently to work on their behalf. Gyu-ri overhears this and, despite badly needing the gang’s help in sustaining their own business, immediately terminates the partnership.

All because it would interfere with Ji-soo’s dream.

Man, if that isn’t love.

In the following episode, Gyu-ri, and later on Ji-soo, is kidnapped by the same gang in retaliation for terminating their partnership. Ji-soo comes to her rescue but Gyu-ri is already almost free (again, she’s really, really badass) and is demanding that they bring Ji-soo to her instead of running for her life.

Surviving this latest attempt puts the two in a reflective, vulnerable mood and Gyu-ri asks Ji-soo why he keeps saving her. Ji-soo asks later on why she keeps risking her life to be with him. They don’t say the answer in words but in an almost kiss (yeah, you read that right - almost).

And then, if you aren’t already convinced, Ji-soo crosses his one last remaining line in an effort to keep Gyu-ri safe; he accidentally pushes a fellow classmate down some steps and, instead of helping her, leaves her to die after grabbing the evidence she has on him and Gyu-ri.

Extracurricular pulls off quite the magic trick here, hiding this well done love story in the middle of a serious crime drama.

The real tragedy is that Ji-soo thinks that Gyu-ri views this whole business, and by extension his life, as one big game. It’s something that she takes offense at, visibly becoming upset when he says that.

But even if that were true, he should be assured since Gyu-ri doesn’t like to lose.

As they hurtle towards the end and face up to the consequences of their actions, Ji-soo and Gyu-ri undoubtedly lose sight of their original goals and dreams. They do some fairly horrible things to stay alive and ahead of the police who are close on their trail. You can’t really blame them for doing what they did; in the face of a society that has abandoned them, what they’re doing is a logical outcome to gain what they want so desperately and deserve so much: the chance to be free to live like normal, care-free people.

I can’t say for certain that they achieve that. The drama is serious in consequences and, at the end, the net around them is drawing tighter and tighter. I won’t spoil the ending scene for you, because I highly encourage you watch this drama yourself but I will say this: Ji-soo and Gyu-ri seem stuck in an impossible situation with nowhere to go, and no one to help them, with a clock ticking down towards either death or discovery by the police.

But, all the same, I’m always the optimist. They’ve gotten through situations like this before and they can certainly do so again. Maybe not as bad as this one, but not too far out of their league. And, like I mentioned before, Gyu-ri doesn’t like to lose. Especially when it comes to Ji-soo.

Their relationship is truly dangerous, as Ji-soo himself notes. Them being together is the source of their problems; they’re too much alike now, as opposed to the beginning of the drama where he stated that they’re too different. Their love is the kind of love where both of them are willing to burn the whole world down if it means keeping each other safe.

I’m a real sucker for those kind of love stories. No one’s a hero here. They’re just kids in high school, doing the best with what they know.

Who are we to judge what is right and wrong? Especially when the one committing the acts are high school kids who don’t know any better and just want to save each other?

Do we have that right?

Do they really deserve that punishment? Shouldn’t we be pointing fingers at the society that forced them to act this way?

Extracurricular really makes you think about that. Is it really so outlandish and terrible what Ji-soo and Gyu-ri do to survive when the adults who are supposed to be protecting them, teaching them better, have failed in their duty?

Maybe they really did win at the end. Not so much in succeeding in their goals but in gaining something that not even regular people are likely to find - a partner, a soulmate, someone who will stand by you no matter what.

If you do watch the ending, and are not an optimist like I am, then all I can say is this: whatever happened, they were together at the end.

They were together.

#extracurricular netflix #human class #netflix #kdrama #oh jisoo #bae gyuri #park joo hyun #park ju hyun #kim dong hee

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lostcoves · 3 years

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ft. tenya iida x fem!reader

genre: fluff

wc & warnings: 2k | mentions of wanting to v*mit

premise: thanks to your friend’s magnetizing quirk, you and your not so secret crush tenya iida are stuck together for the next six hours

tenya iida, oh how you were enamored with him. his leadership, his quirky nature, everything about him made you melt into a puddle. but you were merely another face, a general studies student with an average quirk. you felt like you could never amount to anything compared to the hero course students. yet, fate had other plans for you and him.

"(l/n)-san!" your classmate kirumi yamamoto yelled your name across the classroom one afternoon at the end of the school day. you approached her- although, confused- and asked her, "what is it, yamamoto-san?"

"i need some help with my quirk practice and was wondering if you could help me?" she twiddled her thumbs, smiling like a cheshire cat. you pressed your lips together hesitantly before sighing and answering to kirumi, "okay, i'll help you."

kirumi quickly embraced you and grinned, "thank you, thank you, thank you!"

you would later come to regret this decision.

dressed in your gym uniform, you stood in an empty practice field and waited for kirumi to come out. she emerged from the school and waved at you, you greeted the wave and shouted to her, "whatcha need me to do to help you with your quirk?!"

"you're gonna be my target!" kirumi's quirk was magnets, she could make anything organic into a living magnet. your eyes widened at her response and opened your mouth in protest when she shot a beam at you. letting out a surprised scream, you stood frozen with kirumi's quirk pulsing around you. shit, you were a living magnet.

"now, who should i make into a magnet?" kirumi pondered on the thought until she noticed a group of people walking by near the field. kirumi smirked at the sight, tenya iida was in the group. she yelled to him, "hey iida-san, watch out!" before "accidentally" shooting her quirk's beam at iida. iida tried to duck but the beam was too fast, magnetizing poor iida in one blast. your eyes widened with realization and you let out a shout when iida came flying towards you. the two of you crashed into the ground, both disoriented and in pain.

"sorry!" kirumi laughed nervously.

"yamamoto-san!" iida exclaimed, "undo your quirk this instant!"

"yeah.. no can do!" she rubbed the nape of her neck sheepishly.

"w- wait do you mean?" you stammered, scared.

kirumi let out an anxious chuckle, "my quirk lasts for between thirty minutes to twenty four hours, depending on what i magnetize."

panic bubbled in your chest, you were gonna be stuck to iida for upwards to a day!?

"i'll say you guys are gonna be stuck together for maybe.. six hours?" kirumi hypothesized.

"six hours?!" iida was on the verge of passing out.

"sorry! i'll inform our teachers!" kirumi sprinted off, leaving you and iida to your own devices. queasiness enveloped your body, as you fought the urge to puke on your shoes. six hours, suck to your crush? this was a nightmare!

"before we do anything.. do you need the restroom?" iida questioned to you, his face blushing tomato red.

you shook your head, "thankfully, no. how about you?"

"same for me."

you two were in for an interesting six hours.

─────────────────

hour one - five hours remaining until quirk wears off

you and iida were in iida's bedroom. the teachers thought it would be more suited for you to be under the care of aizawa-sensei and the other pro-heroes specialized with this sorta situation. unable to go two meters without being sucked back to one another, you and iida made the executive decision to remain in his dorm room.

"so (l/n)-san.." iida cleared his throat and gave you an awkward smile, "what's general studies like?"

"like regular old high school," you mused, shifting a little to get more comfortable. iida felt himself getting pulled as a result, much to both of yours annoyance. kirumi's quirk was so frustrating! nothing compared to your simple quirk of water manipulation, a quirk that was a dime a dozen.

"what's it like being a hero course student?" now it was your turn to ask the questions.

"exhilarating," iida breathed out with a smile. he looked so beautiful when he smiled, you smiled in response. he then added to you, "we get in a lot of trouble with villains, though. something that i'm not happy about. they keep interrupting our studies and it's just.. annoying, to say the least."

"i bet," you hummed.

"so uh.. what else would you like to discuss? we got–" iida checked his watch, "–five hours and forty three minutes."

you huffed in exasperation, "good god, this is agonizing."

"hopefully, i'm not upsetting."

"no! you're not! it's just.. it's just.. i need my space," you confessed. iida nodded understandingly and replied, "i understand that. i'll do my best to ensure you're as comfortable as possible while we're stuck like this."

you gave iida's hand a squeeze, "thanks, iida-san."

he returned the hand squeeze with one of his own, his larger hand engulfing your smaller hand.

"of course, (l/n)-san."

─────────────────

hour three - two hours until quirk wears off

perhaps this was a blessing in disguise. you managed to learn a lot about iida while confined to his dorm room and under the magnetizing quirk. he pursued professional heroism as a result of being from a legacy of hero while you attended general studies to ensure a better future when you inherit your family's florist business. your quirk was good for subsidizing costs at the shop but you needed a better education in order to keep the family business afloat. general studies at ua offered a future for you.

"so iida-san," you plucked a grape off the platter of food iida's friend deku dropped off for the two of you, "if you could have any quirk in the world that's not your own, what would it be?"

"are we playing twenty questions?" iida tilted his head in bewilderment. you gave him a nod and he answered, "well, i have.. i'm a little jealous of my classmate todoroki-kun's dual ice and fire ability. i think it would be interesting to have a quirk like that."

"good answer," you plopped the grape in your mouth and gestured iida to ask you a question. he mulled over his question before proposing to you, "what's your ideal partner?"

you nearly choked on your grape but caught yourself before you could. why in the world would tenya iida ask you that kind of question?

"well.. i.. i, er–!" you adverted your gaze from your crush, "i like.. i like intelligent people who are good leaders and want the best for others."

"interesting, interesting.. what about appearance wise?"

you eyed iida warily, "i don't care too much about appearance but.. i like buff people and i think glasses are sexy."

iida made a mental note of your response, "i hope you find someone who matches your ideal lover one day, (l/n)-san!"

iida, you idiot! you thought to yourself, you match my ideal partner!

"so uh!" you cleared your throat, "next question.. what's your favorite food?"

this banter went back and forth for the next hour or so.

─────────────────

hour five - one hour until quirk wears off

you were getting exhausted and it was nearly nightfall at the dorms. your exhaustion was noted by iida, who offered you one of his blankets to sleep with. you grew flustered by the offer but nonetheless accepted it. so here you were, back to back with your crush and laying in his bed. was this a nightmare or a dream come true?

you couldn't sleep. i mean, obviously it was difficult to fall asleep in the presence of your crush. you tossed and turned a bit, the magnet pulse keeping you stuck to iida. the glass wearing boy sighed and turned himself around and whispered, "can't sleep?"

you gave him a nod and iida smiled, "what if i told you a story?"

"a story? what am i, a five year old?" you laughed awkwardly. iida frowned, disappointed. you didn't want to disappoint him so you cleared your throat and changed your answer, "you can tell me a story."

"good," iida wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you close, "my mother would tell me this story a lot when i was little. it starts with a knight and.."

iida went off to tell you the story of a knight cursed to be a beast until he could save a kingdom's princess. it was a story of heroism and sorrow, as the knight failed to save the princess. yet, the princess managed to save herself and in turn, broke the knight's curse with the power of self-forgiveness. you never heard such a tale before so it was definitely interesting to listen to.

"do you feel like you fail at self-forgiveness sometimes, iida-san?" you questioned to your crush, his arm still around your shoulders. god, it felt like the two of you were a couple. iida thought it over and responded, "sometimes. there are times where i feel like i can't forgive myself, such as not being able to avenge my brother for what the hero killer did to him."

you squeezed his arm sympathetically in response, "i'm sorry about it."

"it's.. well, it's not fine but thank you," he answered.

you fell silent, unsure of what to say. you sighed and turned to iida, "tenya iida, can i help you something?"

"sure, (l/n)-san."

"what would you do if someone told you that they liked you?"

"you mean as a friend or romantically?"

"romantically," your pulse quickened and your palms grew sweaty.

"it would depend on the person."

"iida-san.. i know someone who has a crush on you and they're scared to tell you," maybe you could avoid heartbreak if you go with the hypothetical situation.

iida furrowed his brow and removed his arm around you to hold his hands, "someone has a crush on me?"

"yes," a bead of sweat fell from your forehead, "they think you're heroic and sweet and amazing and a true leader. they're just scared to tell you because of the rejection."

"that's understandable," iida nodded. he unclasped his hands and looked back at you, "is that person the one telling me this?"

you gulped, "wh– what do you mean?"

"do you like me, (l/n)-san?"

you adverted your gaze.

"(l/n)-san?"

"i do."

it felt as if a weight had been lifted from your chest at your confession. now, time for the rejection.

"i like you, too."

what? he liked you too?!

"wait, you do? but we barely know one another!" you protested, surprised at iida's reply. iida chuckled and elaborated to you, "it was the sports festivial, (l/n)-san.. or could i call you (y/n)-chan?"

"(y/n)-chan works," you answered.

"well, that was the first time i really saw anyone from general studies perform with their quirks but you.. i saw a hero in you. i remember seeing you aid another student who struggled to get through the race. you helped her all through the race, not caring about winning the race. that was heroic and the start of my infatuation with you," iida explained.

you remembered, a girl had gotten injured and you dragged her through the course. iida saw that?

"then i began seeing you around school and i wanted to talk to you but i never had the chance until now," iida finished with a nervous smile. you let out a soft huff, followed by a laugh. you couldn't believe it, iida shared similar feelings with you. this was a dream come true!

"can i kiss you?” you proposed to iida. he nodded, “you can.”

timidly, you leaned in close and pressed a gentle kiss on iida’s lips. the kiss was tender and sweet, innocent and exploratory.

“wow..” he whispered against your lips, “that was amazing.”

“you think so?” you murmured, your lips still stuck to his.

“i know so.”

“hey tenya– i can call you tenya, right?”

“of course.”

“good, but uh.. i can’t remove my lips.”

iida’s eyes widened and he pulled back, only for your lips to connect together once more. horrified, you realized that you two would be stuck like this for the next hour or so. damn kirumi and her quirk!

yet, this wasn’t a miserable outcome. at least, you and iida confessed to one another. that was more than enough for you.

#bee scribbles #hanimehub #boku no hero academia #bnha #my hero academia #mha #boku no hero academia x reader #bnha x reader #my hero academia x reader #mha x reader #iida #tenya iida #iida x reader #tenya iida x reader #original work

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darklingichor · 3 years

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Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir **MAJOR SPOILERS**

So, this is a first, I've never written a revisit this fast.

I do often read or listen to an especially good book, again, right after I finish it. Usually because I can't get into another book until I do.

I did it with Lamb, and I did it with the Martian.

This one is going to be chock full of spoilers, I really want to analyze the main characters in this book, and I can't do that without going into details. This is why I marked the hell out of this.

Project Hail Mary is even better the second time around. This is often the case. Books are like soup. The leftovers from the fridge are often even better than when you had it the first time.

*SPOILERS* *SERIOUSLY SPOILERS TURN BACK NOW IF YOU HAVEN’T READ THIS BOOK* *SPOILERS* *THE REST OF THIS RAMBLE WILL RUIN THE BOOK* *SPOILERS*

Okay, so run down.

The book opens with our main character waking up to an annoying computer asking him basic math questions. This is detecting cognitive function, that's my guess anyway.

Our character quickly discovers a few things. First, he's in a room with robot arms tending to him, including unhooking him from various life support systems as it figures out that he is awake and functioning. He's not alone in the room, there are two others, but they are long dead. And he has no idea, who he is, where he is, or why he's there.

What follows for a little while is what I would call a psychological screwball comedy. It takes him several days to work out that his name is Ryland Grace and he is a microbiologist PhD who had a falling out with the academic community and found his calling as a Jr. High science teacher. Though exploration, experiments, and memory flashes, he works out that he is on a spaceship, the corpses were his crewmates, and he is on a mission to Tau Ceti to save earth from an alien algae like creature, called Astropgage, that is dimming the sun and setting earth on the course to an ice age that will begin to wipe out humanity in 30 years. Tau Ceti, which is 12 light years away from earth, is resistant to this energy sucking algae.

We get all the backstory of how he became a crew member aboard the ship Hail Mary, in flashbacks as his memories return. A big memory that returns? Project Hail Mary is a suicide mission, he will not be going home.

In the meantime, he is slowly trying to figure out how to save earth, while he does this, he sees a very weird spaceship and meets an intelligent alien being. This being (Grace calls him Rocky) comes from a world (Earid) that is in the same situation as Earth. Together, Grace and Rocky have to work out how to save both of their home worlds.

Ryland Grace is a complex character, he’s very very different from Mark Watney (I haven't read Artimis so I can't make comparisons to those characters).

The Martian points out that Astronauts are inherently noble, willing to risk their lives for science and a good cause.

Grace is not an astronaut. That's not to say that he isn't a good person, just that he is an average person. He can be all at once self-sacrificing and selfish.

Early on he is drafted into the research team on what would be called Astropgage as a science expert by Eva Strat, a woman in charge of figuring out what is going on and how to stop it.

Once he was released from his part in this research, he goes back to teaching, only to be struck by the fact that his students would be in their early forties when all hell breaks loose, and that they might die. He then goes back to Strat and demands to be part of the research again.

This back and forth happens a few times in the story. In fact, it becomes a big part of it. See, the crew of the Hail Mary were put into comas to ensure that they would not go nuts and kill each other on the 12 light-year (four years from their perspective) journey, a medical company discovered that 1 in 7000 people have the genes to survive long comas and still function when they wake up. Grace is one of those people, but he is not volunteering for this mission. It's not that he doesn't care, or even that he doesn't want to help, it's that he's scared. And who wouldn't be? But honestly? I think Grace has imposture syndrome and is generally very sensitive. He realized that his kids would suffer, after starting to teach a class, that speed him to become a part of Strat's team again. Events happen that lead him to being the only logical candidate for the science expert aboard the Hail Mary. He refused, Strat basically kidnaps him, sets the computer induce amnesia in only Grace and plunks him on board.

Before she does this, she harshly calls Grace out.

“Do you think I don’t know you, Dr. Grace?!” she yelled. “You’re a coward and you always have been. You abandoned a promising scientific career because people didn’t like a paper you wrote. You retreated to the safety of children who worship you for being the cool teacher. You don’t have a romantic partner in your life because that would mean you might suffer heartbreak. You avoid risk like the plague.” (pg. 392 Kindle Edition)

This all seems to be true, but we don't know Grace's full story. Other than a mention of one girlfriend in college, and brief mentions of friends, There is nothing in the book about his life before he started teaching. This could be because the amnesia has left those things fuzzy, but in my head, it's because he doesn't want to think about it. Maybe he had a bad family life, maybe he had *no* family life, maybe he had an early tragedy. Maybe he realized his short comings and that, no matter his talent, he just didn't have the temperament for acidemia.

He does like being the cool teacher, he does say he likes being looked up to, but this isn't necessarily a bad thing. He's a *good* teacher.

I had cool teachers before I switched to home school. They weren't all good. I had one that would literally just let us mess around during class because they didn't want to actually grade papers. Cool to a kid? Absolutely! Good for education? Not on your life.

Grace isn't like that, he loves science, he loves teaching, and the kids are learning.

He doesn't like animal testing, he's emotional at the fragility of humanity. In short, in his quiet way he loves life.

He leaves his comfort zone to be a part of Strat's team because he knows he's good at what he does and he couldn't look at his students and knowing they could die when he could help prevent it. That doesn't mean he thinks he will be Earth's savior, just that he can help.

He's unwilling to die.

Usually in books and movies, this translates to coward, but really? It's not. Most people wouldn't volunteer for a suicide mission, especially one this pressure filled. "So, we need you to go into a coma, go to a different solar system, save your whole species, and then kill yourselves so you won't starve to death. We good? Cool."

You can't fault a living being for wanting to live. Plus, the other crew members had time to think it through, really decide, make peace with the decision and *then* carry through with the training. Grace? He was given the training, but Strat always said it was for the science of the mission. She was a little like Dumbledore, in that she was training him in case he had to go, but never told him it was a possibility. When it became clear that he was the choice for the vacant spot, he was given less than five hours to decide, and then was told he had no choice.

He makes noble choices throughout the book, but that one choice was not his own, because Strat was given absolute power and used it absolutely.

I can't say that Strat is a villain, either. She was elected to save earth and given the power to cut through any red tape. Handed all this authority, she doesn't become corrupt, she uses this power ruthlessly, but always with the only goal being Save Earth, full stop, that's it. And even as Grace, understandably terrified, yells at her she tells him that she likes him, that she knows that he is a good man, that he will give this his all. She doesn't *want* to send this unwilling and scared man on a suicide mission. She *has* to. Strat is also complex, she is not nonsense and is committed to her role in saving humanity. I like the reason she gives as to why, toward the end of the book. She got her undergrad degree in history. She takes to heart the old saying that those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

The climate scientists and their models assumed survival based on the idea that all countries will work together for the common goal. However, Strat points out that history shows that that ideal scenario, is not likely to work. She says that most wars, up until very recently, were fought over food, and resulting in famine. As the sun loses energy and crops fail, there will be wars, and they will be over food. And that is what she is desperately trying to avoid – the horror of history brought to the modern day.

I started as a history major, and history is interwoven into anthropology – I understand this perspective.

I am not going to get into politics, but I’ve experienced the agonizing frustration of watching history repeat itself, more than once in the last couple of years. Guessing at how something will probably go due to how something lines up with a similar event in the past and knowing that if someone in power would just listen it might turn out different, or that the eventual problems could at least be prepared for, and watch it happen anyway and everyone act surprised. It’s enough to make you pull your hair out.

Strat has the knowledge and the authority to act on it, I can’t say, that in her position I wouldn’t act the same way.

That is the major difference between Grace and Strat: viewpoint. By necessity of her position and by virtue of her education, she sees the big picture clearly, Grace, however, doesn’t. He’s a microbiologist, his entire career and education is looking closely at the small things and how they would translate to big things. He studies the universe by studying the smallest things in it. It is no surprise that he would need the smaller things to make the bigger things to snap into focus. When he was forced to start research on astrophage, it wasn’t until he was faced with the small scale (his kids could suffer) to make him see his part in the grand scheme of things. Strat is right, he does avoid risk, because he’s avoiding pain, he doesn’t let things in because he feels too much. Yes, the realization about the kids, puts steel in his spine, but not before he narrowly avoids a break down. For Grace, seeing Strat’s point of view, without being able to work it though to his scale, is like yelling at someone standing too close to a mountain for not being able to see the peak. It just can’t be done from where they are.

It makes me wonder, had Strat been up front with Grace, would he have willingly gone? It takes him a while to come around to the idea of helping the project in the first place. If he were told sooner, given some time, had been able to go home, and think, I feel like he would have gone. Something would have set him on the course. Maybe it would have been one of his former students, telling him about their plans for trying out for high school track, or going to college, maybe he would have gone to his usual cafe for breakfast and found out that one of the waitresses had just gotten engaged, maybe he would be told these things and see the fear and desperate need to keep life as normal as possible in the person's eyes, and then he would decide, if, on the off chance no one else could go, he would. Until he remembers his refusal, nearly at the end of the book, he accepts quickly that he volunteered for the mission. Of course, that could have been simply because he couldn't imagine someone forcing someone into something like that, but even as his memories and sense of self come back to him, he doesn't have a sense of terror or blind panic at the fact that he's not going home. I would think that if his unwillingness were something hard wired into his personality, he would know soon after remembering who he is, that he would have never considered being a part of the voyage.

So, I think, had Strat told Grace early on that he had the coma resistant genes and that there was a small possibility that he may have to be the backup for the backup, and then allowed him to come to terms with it, he would have gone without the drama. Don’t get me wrong, there is the possibility that he would have run off and had to have been hunted down, but I think, just like when he went to his class and saw his students, something would have made his conscious kick in, and he would have come back.

That might have been interesting, him running scared for a little while and then coming back? Might have given a little more background into why he is the way he is. But that’s not really what this book is about, I think it’s a forgone about conclusion that Grace would have helped, but what’s really interesting is how Grace and Rocky work together.

Rocky is cool! I love that Weir didn’t go the easy route with the creation of an alien character. Rocky is no Roswell gray with a humanoid form. No no, for our sympathetic alien, we have a spider like creature with liquid mercury for blood who “sees” with echolocation and speaks in musical notes. And it works!!

Rocky is expressive and funny and is great with Grace. It’s hilarious, other than the Russian scientist on Project Hail Mary, he doesn’t get along with anyone as well as he does with Rocky, out of everyone in the book, Grace connects most with a spider shaped rock being, he has to make a computer program to speak with.

Rocky is a tad steadier than Grace, but that makes sense simply because of the two, Rocky knew what he was getting into, and Eridens not only have more time before their star dims to the point of causing a problem, but also, they live a long long time, so, Rocky knows he is going home. But the steadiness is also built into his personality. He and Grace are both analytical problem solvers, but seeing that Rocky is an engineer, his focus is to fix things. A problem arises, and his first reaction is “I will fix that.” He won’t be dissuaded until he has all avenues exhausted.

Grace has a habit, early on, of moping for a little while before rallying and getting to work. His interaction with Rocky brings that pouting time down a bit, and he even pulls Rocky out of a slump a time or two.

The relationship between these two is interesting because Grace says flat out that he is not a social person, he feels awkward in groups with people. But he easily communicates with his students, and he easily communicates with Rocky. Rocky is not childlike, but he does have something in common with the students, Grace, like any teacher, teaches his students, and learns from them. Grace teaches Rocky and learns from him. Grace is comfortable with this sort of interaction; with his students this is where the relationship stops. With Rocky, it doesn’t have that boundary. By virtue of the fact that both are alone in space and crave interaction, they talk a lot. Also, activities that Grace is use to doing alone, Rocky’s culture requires to be done in pairs. The biggest: Sleeping.

Eridens do not sleep without another person watching them. So, he insists that he watch Grace sleep and that Grace watches him. It is not expressly said what other things Eridens don’t do alone, but it is implied (at least to me) that they work better in pairs or in groups. This is true of humans as well, but Grace in particular is a loner, even as he complains that science doesn’t happen with one scientist doing the work (and he’s right) but he does work alone even when the astrophage project opened up to more people, the feeling I get is that he still does most of his work alone unless asked to teach others, or forced to come along by Strat.

Grace quickly becomes acclimated to Rocky’s way of doing things, in an odd way, Grace is more comfortable being Eriden, than he is being human. And I really think that this is the crux of their relationship.

I read somewhere recently that family isn’t necessarily blood, but who you would bleed for.

I feel that Rocky and Grace would sacrifice themselves for their respective home worlds, but they will bleed for each other. Grace must go to a different star system to find family, which is actually really cool to me, because the story manages to have Grace have a story of growth and even a quiet redemption arc all with the background noise of a potential double Armageddon, and we manage not to lose sight of any of these elements. Add to this that the book will make you laugh, cry and think all at once. I love the Martian, but I honestly think this one is better!

#project hail mary #andy weir #book #books #revisit 21 #spoilers #major spoilers #book blogging 2021

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haifengg · 3 years

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Victon Falling for their Childhood Friend

Summary: He’s known you since you were kids and because fate moves in mysterious ways you have never been apart from each other for long.

Genre: Fluff! // Crack if you squint

-> Seungwoo. He is very career oriented. Because he loves what he is doing. It plays a very important role in his life. Well, it actually is his life more or less. But that also means that he barely ever gets to see his parents and therefore hasn’t seen you in ages. But when he did one Christmas Day he was so surprised about how much you changed. Not just physically but also mentally. The two of you met at the grocery store where your mother had send you to get more ingredients for dinner and he bumps into you in the frozen aisle. At first you didn’t recognise him but then you start to chat like in the old days. Of course you had heard about his career but when you tell him that you never found the time to check it out or google it he gets a little sulky. But you clear it up quickly: “Its not that I am not interested! Your job sounds so interesting! Its just that I have been insanely busy ever since I graduated … you know we are launching this new collection next spring and I am still up our suppliers .. well you know-“, you sigh. “I will definitely go and check it out once I find the time somehow!” After listening to you carefully and reassuring you that he fully understands how it is not having time for anything he asks you if you like your job and your eyes suddenly sparkle. “I do! Yes, I really do. It is very different from what I thought I would be doing but its very interesting and every day is different. There are so many things to learn and to take care of, I really feel needed, you know?” Even though the frozen peas in his hands start to melt he would let you go on and on about it because he suddenly realises that you are just like him. In love with your job. Something he never thought he would see on someone else. That exhilarating passion. Being 100% committed. Then suddenly he notices all these other little things about you. He truly started to see you in a different light.

-> Byungchan. One day he sits on the porch of his parents’ house, having ice cream like a grown-up. He’s home because of a huge birthday in his family. Just sitting there and watching the neighbours getting some gardening done, as suddenly an actually pricey car pulls up in the drive way next door. Some woman gets out and he Is fully taken aback to the point where he forgets about his ice cream. It is like this scene in movies. The protagonist sees someone special and their breath is completely taken away. Except that’s no. movie, Byungchan is no protagonist and that person he is looking at is you. Which he notices himself the second you take off your sunglasses and wave at him.

“Byungchan! You’re home?”

You walk over and up the path to his house in your office work clothes and Byungchan has to gather all his remaining brain cells to form a: “Y/N? Is that you?” You nod and pull him into a hug as you reached him. Like you always did when you were kids. “Yes of course! Oh my god you got so tall what did they feed you in college?” His heart dropped as you wrapped your arms around his neck and he laughed nervously.

What was he supposed to reply?? All he could think about was how gorgeous you had become. How independent you looked. Not to mention how impressed he was by that car lmao.

-> Seungsik. Since he was your neighbour all the way back, you have seen each other growing up. But more importantly: Seungsik has seen your error and trial progress of learning how to cook. Its not that you invited him over to cook for him but as teenagers he would randomly come over and by chance witness some of your great failures.

But now you were living in different cities, not being neighbours anymore but still close friends. One night he calls you, asking if he could come visit you next week since he was in town for a meeting. Of course you happily agree, promising him to cook dinner. After hanging up and the entire following days Seungsik was anticipating his visit, curiously awaiting to get to experience your now probably very good cooking skills.

Eventually he arrived at your place 20 minutes early because there was less traffic that he was calculating with. And when he rang at your door you just bolted there to open it, quickly gave him a hug and ran back into the kitchen. Because there was smoke everywhere.

“What’S going on?” He asked following you but all you replied was: “Can you take the batteries out of the smoke alarm? I don’t need the fire department to show up at my door again.”

“Again??” He did what he was told and eventually the two of you stood in the kitchen, eying a briquette like something int the casserole.

“I am so sorry. I really tried my best this time. I wanted to impress you. But we can absolutely order something! My treat.” You say and chuckle completely embarrassed. But Seungsik waved it off. “Don’t worry. I can make something?” Even though you insist on ordering in he sat you down on your own sofa and somehow magically created something very home made to eat for the two of you within 15 minutes.

Who are we kidding? This is not how Seungsik notices he likes you but you notice that you like him.

-> Sejun. I don’t know how to put this into many words because it is very simple: Even after graduating high school and only seeing each other a couple of times a year in your home town - you’re still kicking his ass like you used to too. But now you’re hot. It’s as easy as that. During elementary and middle school - even in high school - the two of you were best friends who never ever thought about having feelings for each other. Of course some of his friends asked you out occasionally and most of the girls in class envied you for your relationship with him and the other boys but you never thought much of it and neither did he. But now that you’re in you 20s and still act around him like you used to things begin to change for him. Especially since you fought in your parent’s kitchen over the last piece of honeycomb your mother made. You held him headlock and he was not just turning red because the blood was rushing to his head but also because he was smothered by your boobs (that he now had to acknowledge). When you led go of him he was out of breath because of your awesome headlock technique. And because he now looked at you teasing him about the honeycomb and he, for the first time ever, noticed saw you as a woman. Not just as his friend.

-> Heochan. It had probably been 4 years since you last saw each other at the high school graduation. And you were close friends back then. Maybe not best friends but very close. And he probably always had a thing for you but either a) Never admitted it to himself or b) never went after it.

But when he saw you at the pre-school he knew he had to. Because you somehow transformed into his ideal type. He stopped by the pre-school to surprise pick up his nephew. And he never thought he would meet you there overseeing the pick up of your students.

“You became a teacher?” He asked you before even greeting and as you turned around your eyes lit up. “Heochan! Oh my god I has been so long.” You chat for a bit and he explains why he’s there. Eventually you were still at work and busy but you agree on meeting that weekend for coffee. So you got back to work but Heochan didn’t actually leave right away but observed you talking to the kids and the parents until his nephew begged him to finally go home.

In the car his nephew went on and on about his day and what sort of dirt he ate at the playground but instead of being worried about his nephew, his thoughts were still caught up with you. He was thinking about the clothes you wore and how the dress and cardigan was making your whole appearance look very soft and calm… Yes he was definitely love struck.

-> Hanse. You see each other frequently. At least once a week meeting for coffee at a local non-chain coffee shop became your tradition. It was shier luck you entered the same college and therefore never lived far apart from each other. You both equally valued and cherished the possibility to talk to and vent with someone you have known for a long time and who knows you very well. One thing you always did was venting about your job. And Hanse loved hearing about it because the way you talked about your boss or some other issue was always very direct and comically. So he enjoyed it a lot. He would listen to you all smiley and snickering. And one day he noticed how much the topic of your bickering had changed. Back in the day it would be about how unfair your shifts were and how much you had to do. Lately it was more about how your male colleagues treated you at work and how sexist it was. You tend to notice more subtle and passive aggressive behaviours of them and tell Hanse about it. Which made him notice how mature you became.

“I am telling you, and this is no joke, he came to work and walked by the window of my office. And the first thing he did was ask me how I was doing and as I said ‘fine’ he gave me this look. This Are-you-really-fine-or-are-you-becoming-an-emtional-stress-mess. I swear to god one day I will end him. Also the other day one of the guys at the ware house actually asked me if I was down spending an hour or two with him with this smug look on his face.”

Hanse raised a brow: “What did you tell him?”

You shrug and take your cup, knowing well what effect your next words will have on him: “I told him even if I was down spending the with him he wouldn’t be able to afford me.”

He just loves how sassy and mature you got and how well you handle difficult situations.

-> Subin. For Subin it would take a while to notice his feelings for you because it is very subtle and simple. Both of you didn’t enter college so long ago and even though you weren’t freshmen or sophomores anymore college still was confusing. At least for him. He likes his major and the field of study he is in but he can’t say the same about his class mates. To be quite frankly: He gets along with them well for the time being but they aren’t his friends. In fact he doesn’t have that many friends in the first place. At the end of the day he would always rely on you for sensible topics or when he needs advice. He can talk to comfortably and even after all those years you have known each other you still get him in a way no one else does. Eventually he realises how he does not have that many friends because all he needs is right here with him. It’s you. He isn’t looking for anything in other people because he already has it.

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alienheartattack · 3 years

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To All Of Us, From 2000 Years Ago

I got so mad about 139 and the leaks that I banged out my own 3000+ word ending to the manga today. Please keep in mind that this is a non-shipping story. Although I’ve exclusively written Rivamika before, this is not a Rivamika story, and although there’s an Eren/Mikasa scene at the beginning. there is no relationship between them, only the implication of feelings that are not quite reciprocated. I also threw some Levi fan service in there because why the hell not?

CW: There are references to and non-detailed descriptions of rape in this story.

You can also read this on AO3!

"You know what you have to do," Eren says. Mikasa pretends not to hear him over the rush of the little creek they're sitting by so he says it again, louder.

"I know," she sighs. "Even now, knowing that you've done something so unforgivable, a part of me doesn't want to."

"You're a good person, Mikasa. You'll be even better without me."

She snorts a laugh. "I've killed people, too. Just not as many as you did."

"You always had the weirdest sense of humor." Eren puts an arm around her, presses a kiss to her cheek. "I'm going to miss it." That's what finally brings him to tears, the thought of not seeing Mikasa again. Or Armin. Or Connie, or Jean, or Captain Levi, even the rest of them. He's had plenty of time to accept that he'd die at nineteen, was always going to die at nineteen, but now that the moment has arrived he wants to hold on just a bit longer.

Mikasa doesn't cry, at least not the way he expects her to. Tears stream down her face but she doesn't sniffle, doesn't sob, doesn't rage or scream the way she’s done in the past. He sees them both, Mikasa the girl and Mikasa the soldier, perfectly coexisting in the inky blackness of her eyes. She has made her decision. She made it before she even stepped into the mouth of the Titan.

"Kiss me one last time," Eren weeps. "Please."

"Okay," she nods, cupping his face with one hand and leaning in close. "See you later, Eren."

When Mikasa pulls away from his lips, the deed is already done. His severed head feels sickeningly heavy in her blood-stained hands. His eyes gaze beyond her, beyond the veil of this world, clouded with the knowledge of the void. The Titan around her begins to disintegrate in plumes of white steam. Mikasa swears she can smell wildflowers.

"Mikasa Ackerman," a girl's voice echoes. Mikasa whips her head around, looking for the source of the sound. Someone seems to materialize from the steam, swirling eddies of smoke coalescing in the form of a small girl, scraggly blond hair falling into her eyes, barefoot in a dirty white dress. Her face is blank, her eyes downcast.

"Ymir," Mikasa says, the name forming in her mouth before she can think of it.

Ymir nods, then points to Eren's head. "You loved him. Why did you kill him?"

"I had to."

"Why?"

"Because some things are more important than my love." Ymir stares blankly, seemingly confused. "The millions of people who died are more important. The world is more important. Besides, what kind of person would I be to stand beside someone who could slaughter so many people so senselessly?"

"You… don't love him?" The little girl blinks quickly, white lids snapping over black eyes. Something about it seems inhuman, wrong somehow. Mikasa cannot help but think of insects.

A tear falls from her face and lands on Eren’s, snaking a trail down his cheek as though he'd shed it himself. "I can never forget what he did and I don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive him for it, but I'll always love Eren."

"You wouldn't die for him?"

Mikasa answers without hesitation. "Never."

Ymir's gaze snaps up to Mikasa's, and she feels sick from what she sees in the girl's odd, dark eyes: a hunger, almost starvation, for the scraps of affection Karl Fritz would throw at her; a longing to be treated well, to be fussed over and doted on and adored. Ymir would close her eyes and dream of a shining, beautiful man when the king held her down and fucked her, made her recoil, made her bleed, beat her when she cried out or complained of the pain. She carved out a space in her mind for him where she sculpted him into her ideal. Sometime between that first bloody night and the day the assassin's spear pierced her chest she invented a Karl Fritz out of whole cloth, a man whose cold entreaties and brutal assaults were proof of his undying love.

Mikasa sees these things from Ymir’s eyes, feels the bruises forming on her back, the tearing and bleeding between her legs, the rotted wine breath of Karl Fritz in her mouth.

"I would never have jumped in front of that spear," she says, more confident than she’s ever felt. "I wouldn't even have considered it." Ymir frowns, cocks her head like she's trying to understand. "You thought you were doing the right thing, but you protected a man who never loved you. You laid down your life for a man who forced your daughters to consume your body. He didn't even mourn you."

A flash of anger contorts Ymir's face. Her eyes dart around wildly, turning Mikasa's words over in her mind. "But he loved me," she insists.

"Did he ever tell you he loved you? Or did he treat you like a slave?" Mikasa's voice wavers at the word slave, at the memory of Eren screaming at her across that restaurant table; the moment her wall of denial came crumbling down. No matter what his plan was, it became clear that day that he would step on any of them to achieve it. She had no idea how true that assessment would become, millions of bodies crushed into the contaminated earth beneath the feet of Eren’s Titans.

She wonders if things would have happened differently if he'd just admitted once that he loved her.

"You are free," she tells Ymir. "You choose your own destiny. I am free, and I chose mine."

Ymir says nothing, her eyes luminous with tears, and then dissipates into the smoke. Mikasa is vaguely aware of the wavering steam around her, of Levi flying on Falco's back and pulling her out of the Titan's mouth before everything turns hazy and white.

She can see the scene from two thousand years earlier as clear as though she were there, floating above it all: the crowd come to see King Fritz's speech, the hooded assassin's arm pulling back, the tip of the spear glinting in the daylight. The assassin lets the spear fly, its arc perfectly aimed at the heart of the tyrant. His wife Ymir, older and slimmer than the girl Mikasa met but still with those same sad, black insect eyes, watches in horror as the tip of the spear flies closer and closer; but she does not move, not even when it impales her husband through the chest and the light in his eyes is snuffed out.

In time-lapse, Mikasa sees it all: the accession of Queen Ymir, wise and fair, and the moderate reigns of her three daughters, and their daughters after them. The power of the Titans remains within the royal family, passed down from mother to daughter, a shameful, secret birthright. They create diplomatic ties with other countries, offering succor and counsel, avoiding the path of war so as not to reveal their ultimate power. There is no Great Titan War, no walls, no telepathic manipulation. The world moves forward in fits and starts as it always has, small skirmishes and occasional wars, but the Eldians remain steadfast and committed to peace. Satisfied with Ymir's choice, Mikasa finds herself closing her eyes, opening them for the first time again in the year 835, in her parents' house just outside Shiganshina, as a new doctor pulls her into the world. He is not Grisha Yeager, she notes, and then she forgets who Grisha Yeager is entirely.

In the year 845, there is no Wall Maria for the Colossal Titan to breach, and no Colossal Titan to breach it.

Inside one of the cities in what was once Wall Rose, a history teacher writes notes on a chalkboard before his first class arrives for the day. He draws a crown in the middle of the board and writes the subject of the day's class inside of it: QUEEN YMIR THE WISE. The teacher is startled by a noise behind him; he turns to find one of his students, a shy girl called Sarah, taking a seat at her desk.

"School hasn't started yet," he says. "You're supposed to be outside."

"I'm sorry, Mr. Smith," Sarah replies. "I was looking at a really interesting bug and the other girls started making fun of me."

The teacher nods. "All right, just this once. If you’d like, sometime I could teach you how to stand up to those girls."

Hundreds of miles away, the forests of Dauper ring with the whoops of an exuberant girl, triumphing at having killed her first deer with a bow and arrow she carved herself. She doesn't care that she's scaring the other game away with her commotion, or that she has no idea how she'll lug a hundred-pound carcass all the way back home.

In Trost, a young boy lingers over his breakfast; not because he wants to miss school, but because his mother's omelet is the most delicious thing he's ever eaten and probably ever will eat. His mother ruffles his hair and pinches his round cheek, then gently chides him to eat faster or he’ll be late.

A little boy in Ragako District, a few inches shorter than his friends, demands another explanation of the multiplication tables. He doesn't quite understand the concept, goes blank when his friends try to explain arrays of rows and columns, but he believes that he can pass today's test if he tries hard enough.

Across the sea in Marley, the prosperous Eldian District is strewn with streamers, celebrating the 2000th anniversary of the assassination of the cruel King Fritz. The children have the day off from school and are gathering in the streets, purchasing candy and ice cream from vendor stalls and exchanging them as gifts to celebrate the sweetness of life. A little blond girl receives an extra coin from her father, who tells her to get something special for herself.

A few blocks away, a doctor fills his medical bag and sets off to see his first patient of the day. As he walks through the crowd of happy children, many of whom he’s delivered himself, he hopes that his only son will change his mind and join the family business.

In Mitras, a shopkeeper opens his door for the first time, pausing for a moment in the early morning sunshine to admire the wooden shingle hanging by his doorway, gently swinging in the breeze. It depicts a hand wrapped around a mug of tea, wisps of steam rising into the air above it.

The door opens while he's adjusting the canisters on the shelf behind the counter, making sure their labels face perfectly forward. His heart leaps at the tinkle of the doorbell. He picked the most musical one, the one that made him happiest when he heard it, and he feels very good about his decision.

"Hello, welcome to Ackerman Tea— Mom!" His voice takes on an adolescent whine when he addresses his mother, which makes him feel like a child and impossibly old at the same time, despite his twenty-six years.

"Did you really think I wouldn't be your first customer?" she asks, beaming. "Of course I'm going to come support my sweet boy." Her gaze sweeps over the shop, its walls painted a deep forest green, the mahogany counter polished to a mirror shine. "I'm so proud of you, Levi. You've worked so hard and it shows." Her voice quavers, her eyes filling with tears.

"Moooom," he trills, softer this time, quietly moved. Her presence feels like an auspicious omen, a reminder from the universe that someone will catch him should he fall. "Is there a tea you’re interested in, or would you like me to help you choose? We have more than thirty varieties."

"You've been practicing," his mother notes with a nod.

Levi shrugs off her comment, feeling a bit bashful that she’s noticed his hard work. "I've never been great with people, and this job is nothing but people. At least until I can hire someone to cover the counter while I blend tea in the back."

"You'll get there soon," she says, pulling a few coins from her purse. "Get me something you'd think I'd like."

He thinks for a moment, his brow furrowing in concentration, before his face lights up and he grabs a step-stool to reach a canister of black tea flavored with strawberry and rose. "This one is sweet and floral, but it becomes so much more when you add a bit of milk. You don't even need any sugar."

"Perfect. You even thought about how I take my tea." She places a few coins on the counter, watching her son approvingly as he scoops the tea into a bag, folds it closed with surgical precision, and ties a blue ribbon around it. "You're going to be a success, my love. I know it."

"That makes one of us," he smirks, then scoops the coins into his palm and puts them in the cash register, enjoying the feel of the heavy keys under his fingers, the spring-loaded pressure of the drawer. He hopes he gets to use it many more times today.

"Will you be home for dinner?"

"I should be. I can't imagine people will want to buy tea at night."

"Good," his mother says. "Because now that you're in business, we should talk about finding you a wife."

"MOM!" he exclaims, a furious blush coloring his face.

Further south in Shiganshina, Mikasa sulks as her mother walks her into town, not wanting to leave the safety of her parents' cabin to learn and play with the other children. She is perfectly happy to do chores on the farm, to learn the simultaneously mundane and arcane secrets of coaxing a plant from seed, to throw feed to the chickens and pull weeds in the garden.

"Mikasa, you're ten years old. Your father and I can't teach you everything," her mother says.

"I can learn from books. I don't need to go to school."

"The fact that you're saying that means you need to go. There's more to the world than just our farm, my sweet. You might want to see the world someday."

The little girl huffs. "I doubt it." Her mother simply shakes her head and smiles, ruminating on her daughter’s impending teenage years, a possible hint of rebellion, but finds that hard to imagine. Mikasa is usually a calm, easygoing child, though perhaps a bit too inquisitive and stubborn for her own good.

Mikasa hugs her mother fiercely at the school gate, watching as she turns and walks back up the road that leads to their farm. She’s excited to make new friends and learn new things, but she misses her home more than she ever thought possible. She lets out a soft sigh, then turns to face the crowd of running, yelling children; her new classmates.

She trudges around the grassy schoolyard, dodging groups of kids chasing each other or playing impromptu games. Everyone seems to know each other already; even if she did feel comfortable enough to go up to someone and introduce herself, she has no idea who to approach first.

"Hey! Give that back!" someone screams behind her. Mikasa turns around to see a small blond boy jumping up and down, reaching for a book that a larger boy dangles just above his grasp. The larger boy just laughs at him, taunting him with the book, threatening to tear it from its spine.

Mikasa frowns, balling her fists at her sides, then approaches the boys. "He said to give his book back," she says to the bully. "Give it back."

The bully laughs. "You think you can tell me what to do?"

"I think you should give the book back if you know what's good for you," she snarls, putting her hands on her hips. The bully laughs again and shoves Mikasa out of the way with one hand, making her stumble backwards, tripping over her own feet until she lands on her behind in the dirt. She gets up, dusts herself off, and runs up to the bully, punching him square in the nose. He falls to the ground, dropping the book. Mikasa tosses it to the blond boy. The bully grabs his nose, tears welling in his eyes, and lets out a wail when he sees his hand smeared with blood.

"You leave him alone!" Mikasa threatens, looming over the bully, her dark eyes shining. He scrabbles to his feet and runs away and she lets out a relieved breath, her heart hammering in her chest.

"That was amazing!" the little boy says. When he approaches her, she finds that he's not actually that small, only a few inches shorter than her. "I've never seen you before. Are you new?"

"It's my first day," she replies. "I've lived here all my life but I haven't been to school yet."

"I'm Armin," the boy says. "What's your name?"

"Mikasa."

"That’s an interesting name. Are you from Hizuru?" Armin asks, his eyes wide with curiosity. He holds up his book, a thick, leather-bound tome, A Brief History of Hizuru and the Minor East Sea Islands written in gilt lettering. "My parents told me that the whole country is built around a volcano. A big mountain filled with liquid fire! Well, technically it’s molten rock."

"My mom's family is from Hizuru, but I’ve never been there and I don't know anything about any liquid fire mountains," she says tentatively.

"It's real!" he gushes. "I'm reading about it now. I could tell you about it more at recess if you want. I like to sit under that tree over there." He points off in the distance, at a huge pine tree that shades a corner of the yard. "They're going to ring the bell soon, otherwise I'd tell you now. Volcanoes are so cool. Sometimes they explode and shoot the liquid fire into the sky like a firework."

"Wow!" Mikasa marvels with a smile. "I can’t wait to hear about them."

#snk 139 #snk spoilers #snk leaks #snk fanfiction #alienheartattack writes

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forhereyesonlyyy · 4 years

Text

for you. // itzy, syn. // one-shot.

in which your childhood best friend tries to distract you from the fact that you’re totally flunking all of your classes by taking you to the places you considered were special to you when you were younger, and you remember why they were so close to your heart in the first place.

word count: 4.8k

author’s note: writing this was really fun, i hope you all enjoy 💓 i apologize for the inconsistency of my updates, i don’t have a scheduler, i literally just drop these out of nowhere and call it a day,,, as for the requests, i will get them done eventually! i am sorry for the long wait, i swear i am just,,, lacking inspiration lately lmao.

genre: high school au, fluff all the way baby, friends to lovers (although, the ‘lovers’ part isn’t specifically stated anywhere.)

tw: mild violence, brief mention of blood.

“(Y/N), I believe you have a clue as to why you're here when classes have concluded?" The guidance counselor, Ms. Jung, said as her assuming eyes traveled from a piece of paper to your eyes. You sat quietly across from the older woman, anxiously bouncing your leg and scratching the cushion you were sitting on. Being called to the guidance counselor's office was something that hasn't happened to you before and not knowing the reason why you're there makes everything just a tad bit more scarier.

On a normal day, you would be walking home with your best friend at this time of day. And speaking of your best friend, you dreaded seeing the look on her face when you meet her by the school gate so late. You had promised to treat her to some ice cream after getting the results for the important test you both took today.

Oh, yeah, that's why I'm here, you thought. You couldn't help but sigh deeply at the realization of it all. You completely butchered the test, and now you were getting the talk from the counselor.

"Your teachers always talk about how you're a well-mannered student who is loved by everyone since the day you entered this school. However," Ms. Jung pushes the piece of paper towards you. You leaned forward to look at the paper and feel your head spin at the sight of so many... failed tests. "You don't make an effort to try at all." The counselor said.

You leaned back on your chair and stared at the bulletin board behind the counselor's desk in an attempt to avoid the older woman's gaze. You could not tell her that you have been trying to get your grades up ever since the first time you got a C+ on a test because you realized that you would just sound dumber than you already look.

You felt your heart swell at your wasted efforts and oh, you just wanted to go home and shut yourself off from the world for a little bit to clear your head, but you know that it wouldn't do anything to your grades. Now you were regretting rejecting an older student's offer to tutor you.

I really shouldn't have brushed off that opportunity. There's no way Jisu can make time for me now. She's a graduating student, I know she must be busy with more important things, you thought. You dread for the time when you have to go home and show your parents your current grade. They never really showed mercy at these kind of things.

You left the guidance counselor's office with a heavy heart. What would your best friend think of you now? The two of you were competing to beat the other into getting the higher grade this school year, there's no doubt that she'll make fun of you because of this.

You can already see her big, toothy grin in your head and if you weren't so devastated, you would've laughed because your best friend's face really puts you at ease. But for some reason, it was doing the opposite at the moment.

You walked past the doors of the building and from the top of the five steps that lead to the door, you could see your best friend's tall figure standing near the school gates.

Shin Yuna, looking cute as ever, had a pout on her face as she leaned against the gates. Her long, lustrous blonde hair was pulled up in a tight ponytail and she wore a big grey jacket on top of her school uniform. It was your jacket. Her tan legs stretched out from under her plaid skirt and you still can't wrap your head around the fact that she was nearly two heads taller than you and the two of you are the same age!

As you walked closer to the gates, you watched as Yuna kicked a pebble solemnly. She hated waiting. It makes her anxious, especially if you don't say anything beforehand. But then again, it's not like you were expecting to get pulled into the guidance couselor's office at the end of the school day.

Yuna turns her head and almost immediately, her frown was replaced with a big smile, "There you are!" She says.

You try to mirror her smile, "Sorry. I got held up by Ms. Jung." You replied, letting your eyes wander to the bright pink hair tie that held Yuna's golden locks together.

"The guidance couselor? What for?" Yuna asked. You flinch at her question, you were hoping that she would whine about you being late and totally ignore how miserable you looked at the moment. You avoid your best friend’s gaze for a minute, staring blankly at the tall trees across the street. You let out a heavy sigh and flashed Yuna a lazy smile, followed by a shrug.

For most people, you were a mystery. Mainly because you never really talk to anyone except for a select few. But for Yuna, you were like an open book. You have been friends since elementary school, so of course you know everything there is to know about each other.

And when you’re being stubborn about hiding what you’re feeling, Yuna makes it her mission to bring it out of you.

Surprisingly enough, however, Yuna doesn’t say anything this time. As weird as it is, you appreciated it. You weren’t in the mood to talk about it anyway.

“Well, whatever then. You didn’t forget your promise, right?” Yuna asked, grinning as she looped her arm around yours. She started dragging you away from the school gates and the two of you were finally out into the streets. You feel the early evening breeze kissing your face as you treaded the pavement. Your tense shoulders finally relaxed as you felt Yuna resting her head on top of it.

You turn your head slightly, “Of course not. And even if I did, you’d make me remember.” You said. Yuna giggles, she knows you’re right. As the two of you walked towards the small ice cream parlor down the street, you realized that you were still holding the piece of paper that had your grades on it. No doubt that Yuna hasn’t seen it, but you still slipped it inside your school blazer. You could see your best friend staring at you from the corner of your eye but you ignore it, staring into the distance.

“Hey,” Yuna tugs on your sleeve, successfully getting your attention. “Are you cold? You can have your jacket back if you like.”

You shake your head, “I’m okay, Yu.” You replied weakly. You were close to the end of the street and across from the little stoplight there was Yuna’s favorite ice cream parlor, but all of a sudden, you felt yourself getting pulled back.

“We’re going somewhere else,” Yuna said. You can tell that she was starting to get bothered by your recent behavior. “I’m not really craving ice cream right now.”

You allow yourself to get dragged around the streets and you realized that your best friend was taking you to the underpopulated part of the town. This section of the city belonged to those who weren't doing very well in terms of money and therefore the quality of the houses, and pretty much everything else, were less than ideal.

Your family used to live here and while your childhood wasn't always pleasant, you still found ways to enjoy every moment of it. Mostly because there was this unnecessarily tall kid that never failed to make your day better just by being herself.

"Yu, why'd you take me here?" You asked as you looked around. It was quiet, but that doesn't mean that it was safe. The scariest things happen in this part of the city, you were lucky that you didn't experience any of them when you were younger. "Oh my God, did you get yourself involved with shady people now? I told you to stop hanging out with Ryujin! Like, I get that she's hot but she's bad news!"

Yuna sputters. "What?! No! Wait," She stops walking and looks at you like you grew three heads. "You think Ryujin is hot?" She asked.

You tilt your head to the side, "You don't?" You didn't get an answer. Instead, Yuna keeps walking forward, muttering something about how she didn't even know what she was trying to do at the moment. You jog up to her side and catch her hand with yours, locking your fingers together.

It's not that you hated this part of the city. The only things you really remember were the worst things. Like that time your puppy passed away, or those numerous times your parents fought, or that time when you didn't catch the string of your balloon fast enough to stop it from flying away to the sun.

The first stop was an old park that was squeezed the numerous run-down apartments in the neighborhood. The fountain at the center of the park had stopped working and vines covered most of it.

"I think... this was where I saw you cry for the first time," Yuna speaks. She staring at the fountain blankly. It was like she was reliving that exact moment on the spot. You don't remember that though. You cried a lot, and you don't exactly keep count. "You were upset because some dumb boy from our old elementary school called you names."

You chuckled lightly, "Oh, that. Didn't you get in trouble for punching him the next day?" You asked.

"It was worth it." Yuna replied with a cheeky grin.

Yuna came to your house late in the afternoon that day. There was a cut on her lip and she bled quite a lot. She tried to look tough but you didn't miss the single tear that squeezed out of her eye when your father patched up her lip. That day, you wondered why Yuna would go through such lengths for you, but that was before you realized that you would also punch a boy twice your size just for her.

“Didn’t we make this our unofficial hangout spot?” You asked as you stood on the fountain. Now you were able to see the top of Yuna’s head, for once. You remember a time where you could still look at each other eye-to-eye, but then she suddenly grew. And then she grew again. Maybe she will never stop growing!

“Yeah, but only because whenever you do that,” Yuna said and pointed at you with a smirk on her face. She suddenly put her hand on your arm and pushed you gently. You let out a yelp as you try to maintain your balance, but you failed and you feel yourself falling forward. You closed your eyes, ready to embrace the pain, only for it to never come. You slowly opened your eyes and of course, Yuna caught you in her arms. “I can do this.” She whispered with that mischievous glint in her eye.

You pushed Yuna away and hopped off of the fountain, “You suck. What if you hadn’t caught me in time?”

“That’s impossible. I’ll always catch you when you fall.” Yuna replied almost immediately, as if she predicted your previous statement. You adjusted your school blazer, making sure that not one spot was dirty, ripped, or folded. And then you reached inside, searching for a certain piece of paper. Your heart nearly dropped down to your stomach when you couldn’t feel the familiar material in one of the pockets.

You looked back at the fountain and of course it was right there for the whole world to see. You quickly snatched it, hoping to the gods that your best friend didn’t see it.

Your wishes ended up being ignored, however. “What’s that?” Yuna asked.

There was basically no point in hiding it. Even if Yuna doesn’t feel like asking you about your feelings now, there will always be that small voice in her mind that will keep reminding her that you were upset about something in this particular day, then she’ll bring it up and you will have no choice but to answer.

You slowly turn around, only to see your best friend eyeing the piece of paper that was trapped between your fingers. “This little thing? Uh, i-it’s nothing. Just... trash, haha.”

Yuna stares at you with an incredulous look on her face, and you sigh, finally giving in. You unfold the piece of paper and handed it to Yuna, your eyes glued to the ground to avoid any more humiliation.

You could see your best friend come closer to look at the paper and a second later, you hear her laughing. Your head snapped up at the sound of her beautiful laugh but you didn’t feel like laughing with her. Instead, you felt frustration building up inside you and you toss the paper towards Yuna, hitting her in the face.

You started walking away. “No! Wait! (Y/N), let’s talk!” You hear yell from behind. You ignore her calls and no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t stop tears from falling down your face.

“(Y/N), please, don’t go.” You could still hear Yuna giggling and when you stop to face her again, her smile was replaced with a look of sadness mirroring yours. She immediately ran up to you and reached out her hand, attempting to touch your face and wipe your tears away. However, you don’t give her the chance to do it, you swat her hand away.

Yuna persists, reaching out again with both hands and of course, you were just as stubborn, so you pushed her hands away again. You sobbed as you dodged her attempt to comfort you, blinded by sorrow and anger.

“(Y/N), just let me hug you!” Yuna said, stepping closer. You started to push her away with more strength, but of course you had to get tired. You had to stop resisting Yuna and allow her to embrace you, and you did exactly that.

“I needed you... to say something nice but you just laughed.” You sobbed into her shoulder.

Yuna started caressing your back, “I’m sorry.”

“You can be so mean sometimes.” You added, hitting the taller girl’s hip weakly.

“I know. I’m sorry.”

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

After that, Yuna led you to an abandoned playground. You remember just how many... interesting things have happened in that exact playground. The one you vividly remember was the one time you, Yuna, and some other kids from the neighborhood played tag. Yuna scraped her knee when she fell while running away from the tagger and you had never seen her cry so hard. You ended up taking her to your house to clean the wound.

You thanked the gods for making your father a nurse because if he wasn’t, then Yuna would probably have a lot of scars at present. She wasn’t the most careful kid back then. Whenever you met up with her in the park or in this playground, she would always have a bruise or two because she either fell from the monkey bars, tripped on air, or got into a petty fight.

If the park was where you shed a lot of tears, then this playground was definitely where Yuna shed hers the most.

“So,” Yuna started as she watched you carefully. The two of you sat on the swings, and yes, this was one of the very many places where Yuna fell flat on her face. “Why are you so upset?” The tall girl asked.

The paper has now been discarded so you couldn't see shoved it up to Yuna's face, "Did you not see my grades? I am flunking my classes, Yu. All of it." You said.

"It's not the end of the world! You can do better next year," Yuna replied. "And you will do better! If there's one thing you can do, it's picking yourself up and pushing past your limits."

You groaned and buried your face in your hands, "Yuna, I love you, and your optimism, but can we be realistic here? I can't keep on going like this. You know that." You lamented.

You feel Yuna's gentle hands pry your hands away from your face. She was kneeling down in front you, wearing her signature goofy grin, and you felt your heart skip a bit when you saw that familiar wonder in her big bright eyes.

"Times like this is when we need to be unrealistically optimistic the most! We need to set up a goal or something! Like, if you manage to do this, then I'll reward you that!" Yuna exclaimed, holding your hands tightly.

You look away and pouted, "Well, clearly I can't do anything, so..." You sighed. You hated being a pessimist, but you really couldn't help it in this situation. Studying hasn't always been your forte, mainly because you thought that you didn't need to do it. You always managed to get decent scores on tests and quizzes without studying. It wasn't until this school year that your grades started getting lower and lower.

"I'm so stupid." You muttered.

Yuna makes a sound of disapproval, "Don't be like that! You know you're smart! You just have to get back on your feet." She said. She started listing out the things the two of you can do to bring your energy back and get you out of that sunken place you were stuck on, but you barely listen.

You thought it was cute how Yuna would gasp loudly when she thinks she thought of the best idea ever. Her eyes would just shine with excitement and she would start bouncing, then she would yell at you to get up and get going.

At that moment you just wanted to hug her tightly, but for some reason, you thought that it would be too much.

Random hugs were cute back in the day, but something about doing them now, in this time and age, makes it weird. And not the good kind. At least not for you.

When you were younger, you loved the feeling of Yuna's embrace. You still do, and you always will, but things a bit... different. You always find yourself wanting to stay close to her for at least a second more, and sometimes you just want to stay in her arms forever.

Her scent puts you at ease and the feeling of her warmth makes you think that nothing can go wrong ever again. It was a dangerous feeling, and you didn't know what to do about it.

"Wanna know how I did in my test?" Yuna asked, sitting back down on the swing beside yours. She grabbed her backpack and pulled out a paper from it with a wide grin on her face. You didn't know what you were expecting, but you definitely didn't predict that Yuna, of all people, would get a D.

Seeing how much your eyes widened, Yuna lets throws her head back laughing.

"Yuna! What the hell happened?!" You asked, hitting your best friend in the arm lightly.

The taller girl slipped the paper back inside her bag and let out a shaky breath. She anxiously fiddled with her hands, and it was almost as if she didn't want you to know. Yuna slowly lifts her eyes from the ground and onto you, "I... I wanted you to win that stupid challenge." She said.

You blinked, "So you can treat me instead? Yuna, you know that I'd buy you ice cream regardless, right?" You asked, chuckling.

"I know! But... I like seeing you smile when you win," Yuna averts her gaze to the ground again, biting her lip out of embarrassment. "God, what am I saying?" She muttered.

You shake your head, still laughing, "You really didn't have to purposely fail an important test just to see me smile, you know."

"But it's you." Yuna replied. You didn't know what to say to that. What does that even mean? As much as you wanted to ask, you were afraid that your best friend might combust at the spot, so you simply did not respond.

(Unbeknownst to you, Yuna was regretting letting those words slip out of her mouth.)

A sudden burst of wind suprises you, and you couldn't stop yourself from shivering. You let out a breath and suddenly you were being pulled to your feet by Yuna, who wore an unreadable expression on her face. "Come with me. There's one more place I want to visit before we go." She said in a soft voice.

Yuna led you to an unfamiliar street. It’s either you have never passed by this part of the area or it was just your bad memory acting up once again. Your hand once again finds Yuna’s, you hadn’t even realized that you were holding your hand until you felt your palm dampening. You look at Yuna and saw that the tips of her ears were reddening as seconds pass. Weird.

Eventually, you realized that Yuna just walked you through another road to your old middle school. It shut down weeks after your graduation and a new and better one was built near the road that connects the shabby and honorable parts of the city.

“It’s a little sad how they don’t even try to demolish these old places. They just leave them here to rot on its own,” You said as you and your best friend neared the building. There were graffiti all over the walls, they looked amazing. “At least it’ll rot with art on it.”

From the other end of the wall, you hear Yuna laughing, “Hey, (Y/N), take a look at this.” She said, waving you over. You stood beside Yuna and followed her gaze. You couldn’t help but giggle at the sight of ‘RYU was here’ written near the bottom of the wall in big dark blue letters. Yuna takes out her black marker and writes ‘Hey, Ryu :) - Yuna, (Y/N)’ right under it, snickering at the thought of her friend spotting it one day.

“So, did you take me here to commit a crime? I thought we weren’t supposed to do that until like, third year of college when we’re sad, miserable, and regretting ever being born?” You asked, following the taller girl to the back of the building. You can see the way Yuna’s cheeks hunched up, indicating that she was smiling and definitely up to something. You just hope that neither of your parents will pick you up at the police station by the end of the day.

Right. I still have to deal with their initial reactions to my petty excuse of a grade, you thought, sighing to yourself.

“We’re here,” Yuna says as she stops walking. In front of you was a small hill that you and some other students from the school used to hang around in. On the other side of the hill was just another part of the area, so there wasn’t anything special about it. But you do remember laying down with Yuna and falling asleep while staring at the clouds. You have never felt so at peace. “I kind of wrestled a lot with Ryujin here which led to a lot of detention and suspension warnings. I’m sure you remember that part!” Yuna explains while pulling you towards the hill.

You hum in agreement, “Ah, yeah. Ryujin went here too.” You said. The two of you haven’t always been on each other’s good side. Ryujin hated how you allegedly forced Yuna to do all these goody-two-shoes things and you absolutely despised how Ryujin would get in trouble and drag Yuna down to hell with her. And until today, both of you still feel the same towards one another, but you have do doubt that you’d jump to defend Ryujin with your life when someone opposes her. She would do the same too, but she doesn’t tell you that.

Yuna lays down on top of the hill, using her backpack as her pillow, and pulled you down to join her. Her sweet cinnamon scent filled your nose and you already felt your nerves relaxing as she puts her arm around you shoulders, pulling you close. She rested her chin on top of your head (where you couldn’t see her beet-red cheeks).

“Do you feel better?” Yuna asked. You nodded, although you were still unsure of what to feel at the moment. You feel your heart racing uncontrollably, almost as if it wants to break out of your ribcage and leap out of your chest. Whenever you were this close to Yuna, it always happened. You always kept yourself still, afraid of the stupid thing you might do if you even move an inch.

(Yuna feels the same.)

“You know, when we were little brats, we promised each other that we won’t keep any secrets from one another no matter how horrible they are,” Yuna says as she slowly caressed your hair, feeling each lock between her fingers. Your eyelids started getting heavy and all you could do was nod weakly while you fought against the temptation to fall asleep. “Well, there’s this one thing I’ve been hiding from you for a while.” Your best friend continues.

Your eyes snap open upon hearing her words, “How long?” You asked.

Yuna pauses and takes a deep breath, “A few years.” She admitted.

Truth to be told, you were more surprised than pissed. Yuna never shuts up once she finds something interesting to talk about, so for her to keep a secret from you, who can basically pass as her other half, is something that has never happened before, ever. You were excited to find out what your best friend could be hiding all this time. A few years is a long time after all.

A wide grin spreads across your face, “This better be good, Shin Yuna.” You said.

“That’s up to you,” The taller girl muttered. She swallows thickly before starting her little story. “Towards the end of our first year here, we were laying down on this same spot. You felt tired from all the stupid work and games we did during recess, so I told you that you can rest with me. While you slept, Ryujin suddenly came up and... teased me, but I told her to shut up because I didn’t want you to wake up... since you looked so beautiful when you’re at peace like you were back then.” She spoke softly and carefully. She has always been afraid to spill way too much emotion than needed, you knew that. But you also knew that this was probably something she has been wanting to get off her chest.

You looked up, your heart beats a little louder when you meet Yuna’s gentle eyes, “Is... that it?” You asked.

Yuna releases a silent laugh and continues, “No. While you were sleeping, I thought about... about how I just wanted time to stop at that moment so that I can keep you in my arms forever, away from all the bad things out there, from Ryujin, and everybody else. I thought that it wouldn’t be so bad if I get to... spend the rest of my days with you. It sounds ridiculous because we were like, I don’t know, twelve that time... but that’s how I felt. And that’s how I still feel.”

It was weird. The way you felt exactly the same as Yuna, the way you would occasionally get lost in her eyes, the way everything seems to slow down just for you and her. Everything was weird, and it felt surreal.

Your breath hitches when Yuna lifts her hand and pushes your hair back, her fingers grazing your skin just a little and leaving a trail of goosebumps. “Then... I kissed you. Right... here.” She taps your nose with her index finger and smiles nervously.

You take her hand in yours, intertwining your fingers, and leaned closer, “The only bad thing in all of this is that I missed that kiss since I was passed out.” You said as blood rushed to your cheeks at the realization of what you were trying to do.

Yuna pulls you closer and she embraces you tighter, now you could feel how her heart was racing as fast as yours were, “Can I do it again, then? Properly this time?” She asked.

Your eyes fluttered close and that was the only answer Yuna needed. She leans down and plants a sweet kiss on top of your nose. At the same time, butterflies invaded in your stomach, making you laugh all of a sudden and hide your face on the crook of Yuna’s neck.

Yuna laughs with you, she was just as embarrassed but hearing your laugh made everything seem a little better.

“Hey, Yu?” You lean back to look into your best friend’s eyes again. She raises her eyebrows, prompting you to continue. “Thank you.” You say.

Yuna smiles brightly, and it was like thousands of suns were shining down on Earth, “Anything for you.”

#itzy imagines #itzy scenarios #itzy reactions #itzy oneshots #yuna imagines #yuna reactions #yuna scenarios #yuna oneshots #girl group imagines #girl group reactions #girl group oneshots #girl group scenarios #itzy yuna #shin yuna #itzy blurbs #itzy fanfic

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adalrikr · 5 months

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though you are lord pent's child, you were never his son. not as klein or clarine were, but in magic you excelled them both. did that not speak for something? the flame answers to your hand as you face the darkness ahead, and you will give it its answer — whether by blood or founding, he never treated you any different. and so the same should be said for yourself. the darkness roars, and you will give it the proof of your teaching.

ambition sharpens its edges upon you, and though you have never grasped for status, you cannot help but welcome its praises. the presentation of the appointment to mage general is the highest honor to a battlefield scholar of etruria, spokesman to your efforts in spite of humble beginnings. now, yours is the glory of the once-splenderous, before the tide of time yet washes it away.

untempered spirit, let your soul sleep awhile. beneath the glass, the future makes demure and inviting sounds if you listen.before the pines turn brittle with ice, which path will you grasp with all your might?

The darkness overwhelms his vision, and Erk is at once alone. His head swims as the images flash before him. One, a darkness to overcome, a flame in hand. The other, recognition, a future that he wanted so badly to be able to reach a hand out to.

He knows his answer before the question is even asked. He's known the answer all along; hasn't he? He knew the answer before he had even seen this vision. It was the exact reason he was in Fodlan, the exact reason he was here at this very moment.

"... Do I even need to answer...?" He asks into the void around him. He does not get a response. Typical.

Fine then! I want the future! I want that recognition! I... I don't to be unseen...

A small hand reaches towards the vision of the person he could be, the highest praises that could be awarded him. He wants his future more than he could ever speak it out loud, more than he could ever admit to even himself.

The vision disappates before him just as quickly as it had come, but Erk has already made his choice.

It was always clear... wasn't it?

#ic #ic: i am to be my teacher's ideal student #inbox: pardon me. just a moment #events: i will put in whatever effort is necessary #event: apolloyn ouranos #AOtau2024

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qwirk · 3 years

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*vigilantes ch. ~64 and main manga ch. ~255 spoilers*

although idk if these are really spoilers if these chapters came out a couple years ago! anime-only fans beware. anyway here’s my extremely long rant about the obvious, not trying to explain anything- i gotta yell!

so that vigilantes arc destroyed me! i’m not good at immediately putting thoughts about media into coherent points but i’m just so sad :( first of all after catching up with the main manga, shirakumo, despite being technically dead during his introduction, rocketed up to one of my favorite if not my favorite character. aizawa is also up there for me- he was first introduced as this strict teacher who seemed to psychologically torment his students for the fun of it, or at least for some yet unknown ulterior motive. but we now know that, while still kinda harsh, he does this to give his students that lead-dropping-in-the-pit-of-your-stomach rush in order to push them to succeed (or something like that?). he truly cares about his students and their growth which has been demonstrated multiple clear times. but what drives him to be like this??

shirakumo!! his actions today are a clear answer to the pushes shirakumo gave him back when they were students. they’re so obviously influenced by shirakumo that they’re almost literally answers. the main chapters are a little foggy because i speedread them at 3 am, but i just caught up with vigilantes.

at the start, aizawa sees himself as someone who’s constantly just behind and will stay there as everyone moves on. he trudges into class drenched after leaving the kitten behind and he’s super emo about it. meanwhile, shirakumo literally flies through the window, also drenched, saved not only the kitten but aizawa’s umbrella, and manages to put on this cheery (albeit borderline explicit) show about it. it’s a CLEAR contrast between the two and aizawa goes as far to say that he hasn’t reached his “true self yet” while he looks at shirakumo and then says that he starts to change.

as if it’s not enough for aizawa to beat himself up mentally, his classmates bring him down for not having a “heroic” enough quirk. shirakumo is constantly stepping in to bring him back up, even during real work study stuff, and goes as far to lend him a pair of his goggles so that his eyes become more useful. this becomes a stronger bonding point between aizawa, shirakumo, and hizaishi for them to start looking to the future together. while wearing those goggles, which are protecting his sight from the strong winds on the roof, he stares into the sky, feeling like he’s getting swept into the future like the clouds in the wind. (also the clouds as a metaphor. damn)

and then we come to the last fight. everyone that aizawa looks up to is crushed in the wake of the villain, and he’s the last one standing. there’s a group of children to protect, and he’s panicking and drowning in his overthinking. the way he’s given a huge panel to himself only to be visually overwhelmed by his thought bubbles stood out to me. and then the thing that snaps him out is shirakumo’s voice cheering him on. it’s a bunch of simple praise, but it means everything in the situation. the friend who’s been pulling him up no matter how hopeless or apathetic aizawa feels is of course the one to spur him into action in a life-or-death situation. aizawa realizes he’s gotta fight immediately, and even reminds himself of exactly what shirakumo told him- that his quirk IS useful and levels the playing field.

i was already kinda spoiled for this part since i read the main manga first, but hearing shirakumo’s cheering the entire time while aizawa is absolutely toiling to defeat this huge villain would have been touching regardless. and when he lands in triumph, hurting but victorious, he screams for his friend to hear that he did it!! but then you see this joy start to like. rot away as soon as it pans to kayama and hizaishi. it’s raining again (THE CLOUDS AS A METAPHOR! DAMN!). shirakumo’s corpse is lying feet away from him, staining the medics’ sheet with blood. i don’t have much to say about this part, it was just a lot for me to process!! also i’m still not entirely sure about the way his speaker works so i might be wrong here, but did he really spend his dying moments with a traumatic head injury cheering on his friend to not only beat the immediate danger, but to self-realization?? or maybe it was prerecorded? idk but either way, truly a hero.

aizawa and hizaishi are left standing in the rain because once again, “it fits the mood.” so obviously there’s the callback to when aizawa first said that when he comes to class after leaving the kitten and i have yet to fully comprehend it because i have no braincells for interpreting media. i guess maybe it’s like- aizawa at first felt terrible for not being able to save even a kitten while being enrolled in the most prestigious hero course in the country. getting drenched while settling with (what he considers to be) a cowardly measure is the icing to the cake for his self-hatred. it’s the classic “this might as well happen” scenario to get soaked by random rain or a car splashing you with a puddle on a bad morning. rain is sad. but in comes shirakumo, equally drenched but still the bright light that he is. he’s also done everything aizawa couldn’t but wanted to and more in this situation. he could do it not just because of his storing quirk, but because he held the life of someone who needed saving more important than the school rules. this decorum lets the kitten slide as it makes itself at home in the classroom. the rain stops soon after. but then you have shirakumo’s death. once again, aizawa, and even hizaishi, who’s usually always upbeat (almost every panel of him was just him screaming YEAHHHHH. plz give him more dialogue) both agree that the pouring rain fits the mood. this also brings us back to the present that preceded the flashback- koichi just rescued a cat and a child from a villain with aizawa’s help, and now they’re standing under an awning to escape the rain. this situation is literally almost exactly what happened at the beginning of the flashback which is why i guess it brought it on, but it’s interesting to see what changed- aizawa is the one who’s learned from this situation and teaching the student the meaning of responsibility (using an abandoned cat as an example, no less), and they’re all properly shielded from the elements this time. i guess the conclusion (that could be totally wrong) i’m coming to is that the rain sort of represents the adversaries aizawa faces in life- his self-deprecation, those that don’t believe in him, his personal failures that he has been facing lately. shirakumo has always been there to guide him past it, and once he lifts up aizawa nothing can shake him again. but now that he’s definitively gone, it’s back to haunt him for this one last moment of sheer grief. it’s only this one moment though, as aizawa clearly uses this moment to move on and better himself not just for his sake, but for everyone counting on him. he’s escaped the rain.

it’s so clear how this manifests in the main manga and i’m so happy vigilantes was able to spin out such a good backstory and explanation for his actions!! one of the most immediate ways we see his ideals stand out is his taking in of shinsou as his apprentice from general studies. it’s absolutely because he sees himself in this boy. he has a quirk that’s seemingly useless once you get into combat and everyone thinks he’s a creep for it. more people might even wary around shinsou than aizawa’s case. during the a vs. b practice fights, shinsou explains what he did wrong, clearly upset at himself for not doing enough. aizawa immediately pulls himself up, reminding him that in order to achieve what he just said, he’d have to be a pro, and that what he managed was more than enough. these parallels between aizawa and shinsou are definitely hinted at in the main story, like when midoriya underestimate’s his prowess in combat at usj, but with the vigilantes arc everything is so much clearer. in the main manga, we get a direct reference of aizawa’s expulsion rate in relation to how it helps students grow when they face “’death’” as he’s interrogating kurogiri. though dramatic, i feel like it has to be linked to the dire situation aizawa faced when the pro heros and shirakumo got knocked out during that one fight because of its placement in the chapter. he understands better than most in the story that a lot of times pushes, whether big or small, are needed to grow. he wants to be to his students what shirakumo was to him.

OK EDIT because i didn’t realize there was more to the arc after 64 lol. so obviously after shirakumo dies aizawa’s and hizaishi’s dreams of starting a triple hero agency have been dashed. aizawa seems to distance himself from hizaishi, or at least they’re on uneasy speaking terms. he’s coping by training super hard and is bent on going solo after graduation, the opposite of what they had all planned. but this time, he has conviction on what he’s going to do with himself, and that’s great! he learns that you have to be there for yourself in life. there’s a small montage leading from graduation to where is now in vigilantes and it’s been hard, but he’s been making it. still a lone wolf as ever, aside from the pushes from kayama to become teachers with her and hizaishi at ua. he thinks doing that would be a stupid choice for him, he’s been alone this whole time and doesn’t work well with others (anymore, he thinks). but now that he’s in the cafe with everyone, he changes seeing everyone fawn over the cat but their new dreams of being a popular cat cafe.

the impact of seeing their newfound hope brings him back to another flashback of the rooftop trio, and THE PARALLELS!!! of them also dreaming to start their hero agency based on their first rescue of sushi the cat. back in the present, aizawa, who’s been spacing off, suddenly realizes the sky and his mind have cleared (THE CLOUDS KEEP COMING BACK AS A METAPHOR!!! if this happens in the main story i’ll cry). i’m still not 100% sure of what exactly makes the dots connect for him, but it’s been hinted through the flashbacks and his reactions to the rescued cat that he’s actually a good teacher himself, though he had been mainly shown to have learned from others around him. he drilled husbandry requirements into shirakumo and interrogated koichi about responsibility as if they were second nature. i think aizawa realized that he’s actually always had a soft spot for watching people grow and do good things and wants to be a part of facilitating that. or at least because he wasn’t able to accomplish doing good with his friends originally, he wants to help other accomplish the goal he couldn’t. also the fact that kayama still sends him updates on sushi isn’t just really nice of her, but it’s also another representation of how aizawa’s convictions he developed as a student still drive him to do what he does today.

MY MAIN POINT IS: aizawa really loves shirakumo. to have so much of his character based in the lessons he purposefully or inadvertently taught him is an amazing testament to that appreciation. aizawa never emotes except for the occasional creepy smile when he psychologically toys with 1a, but the emotion he displayed during the interrogation really caught me by surprise. the apathetic emo character suddenly being truly happy or sad is a cliche but this panel right fucking here was so powerful to me:

yeah his eyes are always bloodshot as a trademark to his quirk, but the emotional EXHAUSTION written on his face is so starkly different than his usual boredom. this feeling that horikoshi illustrates in two small panels is so human that it’s instantly recognizable deep in our hearts. we’ve all been in those heavy and direly serious moments that wrack our mental and emotional fortitudes, where the only response manageable without hideously breaking down is some subtle motion of the hand or crinkle of the face. we all know what this means without understanding the japanese onomatopoeia or needing additional dialogue. before i read vigilantes, i still immediately understood what this man meant to aizawa. and that’s why i love shirakumo so much!! we all know at least a little how aizawa used to feel as a student, and to have someone constantly pushing you and acting as such a light in your moments of darkness is something so incredibly special. i really hope they’re able to get him out of his nomu state so those three can finally become heros together :’)

god!!!!!!!!!!

#bnha #mha #bnha vigilantes #mha vigilantes #aizawa shouta #eraserhead #oboro shirakumo #loud cloud #phew i haven't written something like this in YEARS #mod

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fantasyfandommaiden · 4 years

Text

Rossi VS Regal (ML Counsellor AU)

Lila Rossi was beyond mad at this point. Her plans to get Marinette expelled had failed, and she had had to lie about yet ANOTHER condition that she had in order to not get into (too much) trouble, but when the STUPID school counsellor insists on talking to Lila and her mother about all the ‘trouble’ she is causing, Lila decides to deal with the neustants the same way she deals with all her problems… with a little bit of magic.

(Post Ladybug, also slight Ladybug Divergence)

~~~~~

[[MORE]]

Lila Rossi comes from a long line of magic users, dating back nearly two and a half centuries… Okay, maybe it wasn’t a long line considering some of the OTHER families, but still, 250 years worth of magic users wasn’t something to scoff at. Her family all specialised in matters of the mind and trickery, her mother was in fact in charge of altering the memory of non-magical people so that word didn’t get out about the magical community, and was top in the field. That was one of the reasons they had moved her from Italy, because some trouble makers were using the chaos of Hawkmoth’s akuma attacks to cause trouble and her Mama needed to alter the memories of some mortals so not to cause too much chaos.

Lila on the other hand was unnaturally charismatic, whatever words she spoke people would instantly believe her and wouldn’t bother fact checking… at least to a certain point. If she told a lie that someone else knew to be false without an ounce of doubt, then the spell would break and suspension would begin to set in (for example, if she stated that she was Ladybug’s best friend and Ladybug herself heard this, having never met the girl, the spell would break).

Marinette was one of those people who knew she was lying, and that made her a threat. So, Lila tried to sew doubt into her classmates, however that proved to be extremely hard to do, because as one of the classmates pointed out ‘Yeah, Marinette can be jealous sometimes, but she would NEVER be down right mean or bully someone!’ meaning that if she claimed Marinette was bullying her, there was a good chance that the spell would break and her hold on the class with it.

So, she had to be clever. Marinette didn’t get a lot of sleep? She didn’t have time to study and decided to cheat on the test. Lila had to escort her to the principal's office? Marinette had been so distraught that when Lila tried to comfort her, Marinette accidently pushed her down the stairs, hurting her knee badly. Her necklace went missing? Marinette was already known to have a history of stealing items from other classmates.

What she DIDN’T count on was Adrien Agreste all but threatening her to tell the truth… which she did begrudgingly. What she hadn't counted on was being told that her and her mother had to speak with the counsellor to ‘check up’ on Lila. Mlle Regal had been out of the country for a week to see her family and had only just returned, and she was not happy with what happened well she was away.

Lila had to deal with this quickly. Her mother had paused to speak with a teacher and Lila had told her Mama that she was going to go on ahead and let Mlle Regal that they were there.

She all but ran to the woman’s office, opening the door and walked into the office, her hands raised slightly as she began to cast her spell, using several complex hand gestures. She ignored the feeling that she shouldn’t do this, even though she felt her magic almost scream at her not to, she pushed that down. Her reputation was more important than her ‘conscious’. Before Mlle Regal could even speak a word, Lila had already began reciting her spell.

“You will tell my mother that there is nothing wrong, that what the principal asked us to speak about is someone else’s song. You will tell my mother that I am the ideal student and that there is nothing that I need to do to repent.” Lila finished the complex hand gesture as her eyes flashed a poisonous green colour. The hand gestures were needed in order to complete the spell, even if she sometimes felt ridiculous doing them, but with time and practice, eventually she should be able to do this sort of thing with just a twist of her wrist, or possibly even just blinking her eyes, but only powerful mages could do that.

She then sat down in one of the chairs, a victorious smile on her face, her and her mother would be out of here in five minutes tops.

Mlle Regal sat at her desk frozen for several moments as Signora Benigna Rossi appeared at the door way, but she did not enter the office. She stood there confused for a few moments as she looked towards Mlle Regal who looked right back at her. The red haired woman gave a small smile and a nod “Please, come on in Signora Rossi.” she said warmly. Benigna gave a small, almost uneasy smile as she entered as well, taking a seat beside her daughter. “I hope that you had no trouble finding my office, if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask.” Mlle Regal said, still smiling.

Lila’s mother gulped slightly, but smiled “Oh, no trouble at all Mlle, do you have other meetings?” she asked almost nervously which confused Lila. Mlle Regal wasn’t nearly as intimidating as other teachers, why be nervous?

“Oh no, I don’t have any other meetings, I just feel like this meeting will either be very short or very long, I have no preference really. Now that we are all here.” Mlle Regal’s eyes flashed a brilliant ember colour as the door slammed shut and locked, as well as the curtains closing so that no one on the outside could see. The woman leaned forward, elbows on her desk as she delicately placed her chin on top of her hands, looking at the two woman with a soft smile yet a dangerous gleam in her eyes.

Lila felt a chill go up her spin as she finally allowed herself to FEEL the room she was in, her blood run cold. There was so much magic here, it almost radiated in the air within the room; she had entered someone’s domain. No wonder her mother paused before entering, it was considered rude to enter without asking permission first! It also explained why her magic had told her not to, it hadn’t been her conscious… she had done not one but TWO misdeeds well in someone else's domain, the worst part? Mlle Regal seemed to be extremely powerful if the lack of hand gestures were any indication.

Mlle Regal smiled dangerously, almost in a feral way before saying in a sickly sweet voice “Lets talk.”

~~~~~

For almost a solid minute no one spoke. Lila was trying desperately to figure out how to make this turn out okay for her, well Carmine simply sat there, smiling that dangerous coy smile. It was finally Bengina who broke the silence.

“I had no idea that a magic user was placed in this school.” she said, giving a small smile, “I’m sorry, but the name ‘Regal’ doesn’t ring any bells for me. Your family isn’t from France, are they?” she asked, clearly trying to break the ice.

Carmine’s eyes flickered over to the woman, giving a small smile, “I’m not surprised you haven't heard of us, your originally from Italy. The Regal family is mostly based in England and North America, however, my mother was a Rosewood before she married my father.”

“Rosewood? As in Yarrow Rosewood?” Bengina asked curiously. Lila felt her sense of dread growing more and more as Mlle Regal nodded. Yarrow Rosewood was on the council here in France, and the Rosewood (from what Lila understood) were a VERY old magic family, dating back to the time of Merlin himself.

“Yes, he’s my uncle.” Mlle Regal said smiling, “We are very, VERY close.”

“Oh that’s wonderful! I just saw him this morning! Next time I see him, I'll be sure to tell him I’ve finally met you! He talks very highly of you, that is if your the one he refers to as his ‘Little Camilla’?” Bengina said with a warm smile. “He says you are a very talented magic user!”

Mlle Regal gave the woman a soft smile back “Yes, that would be me. And speaking of magic, can we discuss WHY Lila has been using hers well inside the school against her classmates and staff so they will believe her stories?” Mlle Regal asked ever so innocently.

Lila felt herself panic as Bengina looked at the woman with a confused expression “Mama, she’s exaggerating, I don’t abuse my magic-”

“Tinnitus in the left ear caused by a jet plane engine from when she saved Jagged Stone’s cat, arthritis in her wrist from volunteer work in Achu while with Prince Ali, being best friends with Ladybug herself, being away for SEVERAL months due to traveling abroad, and a medical condition that makes her lie about things uncontrollably.” Mlle Regal said, looking down at a clipboard that was on her desk before looking up at the two Rossi woman with a raised brow “This is just the big things of note, but there are others on this list from Lila’s teacher, as well as concerning students-”

“Mama, there’s this one girl, Marinette, who has been bullying me-” Lila began however a cold glare from Mlle Regal stopped her mid-sentence.

“Lila, I am only going to state this ONCE. Do not attempt to lie while you are within my domain.” Mlle Regal stated “This list was brought forward to me AFTER your attempt at getting Mlle Dupain Cheng expelled, which I have a feeling your magic also had something to do with it.”

“Now Mlle Regal, that is going a little far.” Bengina finally commented, looking at the woman. “Yes my daughter has a decent amount of magic, but she would never use it against her classmates unless it was for a good reason.”

Mlle Regal raised a single brow at the statement “Oh really?”

“Yes, and what is this about traveling to Achu? Lila and I haven’t left Paris since we arrived here.”

“Lila claims that the reason for her absences from school was due to her being in Achu doing volunteer work for the past several months.” Mlle Regal stated evenly.

Bengina’s eyes widened as she slowly turned to Lila, who shrank slightly at her mother’s glare. “... Mlle Regal, has the school been closed at all during akuma attacks?”

“The longest the school has ever been closed because of an akuma attack is a single day, Signoria Rossi. Chat Noir and Ladybug are usually able to handle any akuma within the first few hours of them appearing, I believe the longest it took them to take one down was roughly seven or eight hours.” Mlle Regal stated truthfully in a matter of fact tone.

Bengina stared down at her daughter “... You’ve been LYING to ME?!” she accused, her eyes narrow as Lila shrank in her seat. “You stated the school has been closed for months because Ladybug and Chat Noir were having difficulty doing their job! I was going to go to the council next week with a request to send in magic users to assist them!!!!”

“We wouldn’t be able to anyway.” Mlle Regal stated in a matter of fact tone, which caused both Italian’s to look at her confused. “The Miraculous are immune to our magic but we can still be affected by them. Even with a summoning spell we weren't able to summon the Butterfly Miraculous to use, nor do scrying spells work so we can’t pin-point his exact location.”

“What about anti-glamour spells, so at least we can find out who is really is?” Bengina asked with a raised brow.

“Hawkmoth has only ever showed his face in public twice to my knowledge, both times he disappeared too quickly for that sort of spell to be cast, and like I stated before, the Miraculous are immune to any spell casted.” Mlle Regal stated “However we are not here to discuss Hawkmoth, we are here to discuss your daughter’s abuse of magic, as well as her absence from school.”

Lila’s eyes widened as the attention was placed back on her. “I just wanted to make friends-” she began only to see her mother and Mlle Regal look at her with a look that stated ‘Do not lie.’

Lila dropped the act and rolled her eyes, leaning back in her chair “It’s an inherited ability that anything I say seems believable to mortals. Whenever we moved I always tested it, if I am going to be an amazing magic one day, I need to practice. I’ve never done anything that caused someone harm.” she stated, looking at the two woman “Everyone claims to know a celebrity or two, I don’t see what the big deal is.”

“You know what Lila, you are completely right.” Mlle Regal stated, giving a warm smile surprising both Rossi women.

“I am?” “She is?”

“Yes. Magic, like any skill, needs to be practiced. And if its a sort of magic that you can’t fully control, I understand the feeling of needing to be ABLE to try and master it.” Mlle Regal said, still smiling warmly.

Lila blinked, before smirking. Looks like she was going to get away with it after all. Mlle Regal couldn’t exactly tell the school about her magic without breaking the law on it, and even IF her uncle was a council member, he only had so much pull and Lila doubted that he would bother with something so minor as a child lying about knowing celebrities.

“However.” Mlle Regal said, still smiling warmly “What about trying to get Marinette expelled?” she asked ever so sweetly, looking Lila dead in the eye. “Or trying to get the whole class to turn against her by claiming she stole your grandmother’s ‘priceless’ family heirloom?”

Mlle Regal placed her hands on her desk as she slowly stood up, her warm smile turning cold, than deadly, the very air in the room seeming to become denser.

“What about using your magic to manipulate the staff to jump from investigating straight to expulsion against a student? Or better yet, what about you coming into MY office, my DOMAIN, trying to cast a SPELL against ME to make me sweep everything under the rug so you can get away with all of the vile deeds you’ve done?!” Mlle Regal all but snarled at the girl, the air crackling with magic energy.

Lila sank further into her chair, trying despratly to get away. It seems that Lila had underestimated Mlle Regal in every way possible. Lila looked around the room anxiously, looking for the sign of an akuma to get out of this situation… but none showed.

Mlle Regal took a deep, slow controled breath, seeming to calm down as the buzz of magic slowly calmed down. She looked towards Bengina, who still looked stunned at everything that had just happened.

“Your daughter has broken one of the basic rules of any domain by trying to cast a spell against me, not to mention…” the red haired woman’s eyes narrowed at the girl “She has caused chaos while within the school with her magic against mortals.”

Bengina stayed silent for a long time, looking straight at Mlle Regal. “... whatever punishment you find fitting for this I will support.”

Mlle Regal raised a brow “... Even if I state that her punishment shall be the lose of her magic?”

Lila’s eyes widened with fear as she looked at her mother who simply nodded “Mama, you can’t be-“

“Lila, you broke domain and have been using magic against mortals. Your lucky that Mlle Regal hasn’t summoned a member of the council here yet.” Bengina hissed, glaring at her daughter.

Mlle Regal leaned back in her chair, closing her eyes deep in thought. “... I won’t take your daughters magic away. She is still young, I would hope that she still has time to learn… However, no ill deed can go unpunished…” she walked around her desk to stand in front of Lila, looking at her bracelet. “Give me your hand.”

Lila looked at her, almost glaring “Why-“

“Give me your hand or I WILL take your magic and summon the council.” Mlle Regal hissed, her eyes flashing an almost demonic yellow. Lila hestitantly held out her hand, Mlle Regal grabbed her wrist, her hand encompassing Lila’s woven bracelet. Her eyes turned from hazel to ember as she began to speak.

“From this day forward until you repent, every spell and incantation shall cost twice what is spent. Every lie that is whispered from your lips, shall make you feel pain from your toes to fingertips. And if you ever try to harm one of your peers because of jealousy or greed ever again, you shall find yourself at the mercy of the councilmen.”

Lila felt her bracelet get unbareably hot, it felt like someone had placed red hot iron shackles on her wrist. She tried to scream but no sound came out as Mlle Regal let go of her wrist with a cold expression on her face.

“What did you do?!” Lila hissed, glaring at the woman who looked back at her.

“Surely you were following along with my incantation.” Mlle Regal stated with a neutral tone. “But, I will simplify it for you. Until You repent for everything that you have done here and at your other schools, you will now find it incredibly difficult to do even the most basic of magic. Also, every time you lie you will feel pins and needles going through your entire body. Finally, if you EVER…. and I mean EVER, even AFTER you find yourself repeating for your crimes that you try and do something like you did to Mlle DupainCheng” Mlle Regal looked down at the girl with a cold expression, one that had never been seen before on the usually warm Counsellor “... you will be instantly teleported to the council, for them to decide your fate.”

Lila felt her heart stop as she stared in horror at the woman “... you…. you can’t do that!”

“I believe I just did.” Mlle Regal said evenly. “See that you learn your lesson Rossi… otherwise, the council will not be as forgiving as me.”

No one touched or messed with Mlle Regal’s students… No. One.

#ml counsellor au #carmine regal #lila rossi #mrs. rossi #ml salt #no one touches carmines kids #long post

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bisexualbuckleyy · 3 years

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Hi 🙋‍♀️

About your latest post: I full heartedly agree with all of it. Especially the part where you said not to blame the actress. (🤬🤬🤬 I am so done with the type of moron that thinks it’s ever okay to harass people. IT IS NOT; so stop it! 😟😤😠)

When it comes to the fandom*: I think when it comes to any LI for Eddie, the big dealbreaker is whether Chris likes them. And whether they are genuinely interested in Chris. I think that’s part of the reasons that so many fans are indifferent about Eddiana (or downright hostile). The breadcrumbs are there, but none of the clues are actually developed.

I saw how you mentioned Ana’s plotline is simply underdeveloped. And I agree with that too. So here are a couple of simple alterations, that would make Ana a more rounded character. But more importantly: would just make a lot more sense.

Ana as a vice principal: I had to look up “vice principal elementary school” for this. But from what I red, one out of many duties of a vice principal is to keep track with documentation on student discipline and progress. They read and sign the report cards that are sent to a student’s home. I don’t think it’s explicitly mentioned that Ana started working at a different school than Christopher’s. And the hug at the end of the episode definitely suggests she still works at the same school. One thing they could have done, is giving Ana a role in signalling Chris’s struggles. This would point out the dilemma she faces, since even an elementary schooler has a right to privacy, and dating his parent somewhat compromises that. But Ana just wants to help. This would make for a more in-depth storyline.

Chris’s problems with schoolwork: one thing that definetely bothered me is the subject that Chris struggles with. From the teacher-parent conference in 3x12, we know that Chris does pretty well in school. Especially in the more sciency subjects (like geography and chemistry). From the conversation with the English teacher, we mainly pick up that Chris is a popular student. (This makes total sense, when you consider when he talks to Buck in 4x08 about how much he misses everyone.) And that he likes to make up stories. Now, it’s not uncommon for children with CP to have learning difficulties. (I got all of this from an Australian website about CP.) Like with languages: not necessarily with written language, but even more with spoken language. (CP affects the mechanics of forming words; so pronounciation can be hard.) Homeschooling also means a lack of oral imput; there is a narrower variation of different voices and speech patterns. And less occasions to practice speaking, because there aren’t as many people you talk to. With writing I realise I am on thin ice here. Because I’m dangerously close to confusing the actor and the character. (And the last thing I want to do is bash Gavin; he’s my personal hero. <3) But I think it would have helped relating the plotline of Chris academic problems more closely to the character. And at the same time, create a logical connection with Ana’s supposed major.

Ana’s role as a tutor: this brings me to my final point. We initially got to know Ana as Christopher’s English teacher. Now that she got her doctorate, she has a more formal function at school. So from that, I’m assuming she studied a little more than just English; more like languages in general. This would probably also include language acquisition. With that background, she would be the ideal tutor for Christopher. On the one hand, she could help him with the exercises. And on the other, she could offer Eddie (and Carla; please PLEASE bring back Carla! 🥺) advice on how to get Christopher what he needs. (Yeah, I realise I’m paraphrasing Buck, so the #buddie shippers can come for me now! ^^)

All in all, this storyline the way I imagined it would have offered 1. consistency with what we already knew, 2. more sympathy points for Ana (instead of just being the hot Latina teacher 😐), and 3. an actual purpose for the woman: even if it hadn’t worked out she could have actually meant something for both Christopher and Eddie. And maybe she will, in the future. But right now, the storyline just seems cramped, awkward, and forced. Our girl Ana (as well as “our girl” Gabrielle) deserves better than that.

What do you think about this proposition? It’s pretty late at night right now, so I’ll go to sleep. I hope you can find the time to reflect on my humble theory. ☺️

Thanks in advance! 🙏

Love,

— “Thel.”

*.) When I say “fandom,” I mean regular fans, but monomaniacal Buddie stans. 🙄

thank you so much for the ask!! i 100% agree with everything you said i think any of those storylines could have made ana a more interesting character but it feels like the writers aren’t even trying to develop her at all. currently i’m not sure how her and eddie breaking up would even impact the story much because she’s been in like four scenes all of season 4. here’s to hoping that they either realize buck and eddie should be together or they give ana an actual personality and do something to make me invested in her and eddie’s relationship

#asks #911 asks #911 #911 fox #ana flores

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artificialqueens · 4 years

Text

Ms. California, Chapter Six (Crygi) - Mik

A/N: I am SO sorry for taking so long to update! I had the worst case of writer’s block ever, and I had midterms this week. Thanks for being patient. I hope this makes up for my lack of posting!

Summary: Crystal moves to Los Angeles from Missouri and meets Gigi Goode, captain of the varsity cheer squad. Queue the 1990s lesbian high school AU that absolutely nobody asked for.

It’s been two weeks since Gigi announced to the cheer squad that Crystal was, in fact, her friend. And those two weeks had been delightful.

Every day, Gigi made a point to either sit with Jackie, Crystal, and Jan at lunch, or pull Crystal over to the squad’s lunch table. Crystal found herself beginning to enjoy getting to know the group: most of them were, to her surprise, funny, genuine, and generally good-natured. She especially found herself clicking with Nicky and Jaida. Although they were standoffish at first, Crystal quickly bonded with Nicky over her interest in fashion (although many would consider Crystal’s taste questionable at the very best, Nicky seemed to think it was “perfectly unique and lovely”) and Jaida over being the “new kid”, as she had moved from Wisconsin just a few years prior.

When Gigi first began sitting with Crystal, Jackie, and Jan, Jackie seemed to be pensive. She kept quiet and let the other three girls do all of the talking. However, this changed as soon as Gigi talked about what it was like sneaking into gay clubs in West Hollywood. Jackie lit up, asking questions about it for almost the entire lunch period. Crystal knew Jackie wanted nothing more than to have an out-and-proud gay community surrounding her - she was the only one of the four who everyone knew was gay. Gigi promised that she would accompany Jackie, and the other two girls, on one of the “18+” nights that the clubs held. From then on, Jackie seemed to gradually warm towards the blue-eyed cheerleader.

Gigi would drive Crystal home most days, often electing to come inside to do homework and cook dinner. The two would spend the first hour unable to focus, finding themselves tangled up in Crystal’s bed, lips attached and make-up smudged. Eventually, they’d compose themselves and start homework until Crystal’s mom arrived home. She’d hug both girls, and the three would automatically make their way into the kitchen. Gigi had made the comment that she felt, in many ways, that she was already closer to Crystal’s mom than her own. Crystal felt sad for her - Gigi never talked about her family and assumed that the situation was less-than-ideal - but her heart soared when she saw the blonde and her mom in fits of laughter together. Gigi would eat dinner with her family most nights, and Crystal would kiss her goodbye through the window of her magenta convertible before she drove home. They had fallen into a comfortable routine and Crystal could not have been happier.

Crystal is sitting with Jackie at their secluded lunch table, sketching the outline of a bird for an art project while Jackie flips through her government textbook. It’s a strangely gray day in Los Angeles and Crystal almost wonders if it will rain: the sun is completely hidden behind fog and dark clouds and it’s chilly enough that Crystal wishes she’d brought a hoodie with her to school.

She’s pulled out of her thoughts when she hears Gigi’s familiar laugh from a distance. It’s light and high-pitched and it makes Crystal light up. She turns around to see Gigi making her way over with Jan; they’re both wearing their cheer uniforms and Crystal doesn’t think she’s ever seen anyone look as stunning as Gigi does.

“Hey girls!” Gigi says as she sits down next to Crystal.

“Hey!” Crystal grins. “You look uh, really pretty in your uniform,” she says in a hushed tone. It’s the first time she’s seen Gigi in it.

Gigi blushes. “Thank you.”

“So, we were talking about what we could do tonight after the game!” Jan interrupts, nudging Jackie softly to get the girl to look up from her textbook.

“What’s that?” Jackie asks, shutting the book.

“What if we all had a big sleepover?!” Jan suggests excitedly.

“Where?” Crystal asks.

“Jan’s house, her mom is really cool,” Gigi explains.

“Yeah, she knows about Jackie and I and is like, super happy for us,” elaborates the other blonde.

“She’s just happy that you’re finally dating someone who hasn’t had all of their braincells tackled out of them,” Jackie quips with a smirk.

“Ouch. But you’re not wrong,” Jan laughs, “I guess football guys aren’t always the brightest tools in the shed.”

“So, what do you think?!” Gigi interjects.

“I’m up for it!” Crystal agrees quickly, excited to spend more time with both of her new friends and her… whatever Gigi is to her.

“Jackie?”

“Obviously!” Jackie smiles.

“Yay!” Jan and Gigi simultaneously exclaim.

“Will you gals come to the football game, then?” Jan asks.

“I guess,” Jackie decides hesitantly.

“I’ve never been to a football game,” Crystal says. “I’ll give it a try, though. Why not?”

“You and I can just hang out at the top of the bleachers and read, Crystal,” Jackie tells the curly-haired girl.

“For sure.“

“Oh, come on, where’s your school spirit?! You gotta cheer the team on!” Jan jokes with her girlfriend and Jackie rolls her eyes playfully.

The wind begins softly blowing, making Crystal shiver again. She doesn’t understand California weather - it’s usually hot enough that she feels like she needs an ice bath, but right now, a warm sweater and some hot chocolate sounds delightful.

“Crys, are you cold?” Gigi asks.

“Oh no, I’m fine,” Crystal assures the blonde, trying not to shiver as another gust of wind blows through.

“You look like you’re cold, I’m giving you my jacket,” Gigi tells her decidedly.

“Gi, no, you totally don’t have to -”

“Here,” Gigi says, pulling off the purple letterman’s jacket.

Gigi drapes the heavy jacket around Crystal’s shoulders. The jacket is huge on her, probably because Gigi is so much taller than she is, and it envelopes her in warmth. Crystal can’t help but notice that it smells like vanilla - exactly like Gigi.

“Thanks,” Crystal blushes as Gigi leans in closer to her.

“You look really good in my jacket and I really want to kiss you right now,” the blue-eyed girl murmurs matter-of-factly.

Crystal’s face heats up more, and although she’s (kind of) gotten used to hearing compliments from Gigi, her brain still seems to short-circuit whenever Gigi says something sweet.

“Get a room!” Jackie laughs, noticing the romantic tension between the two.

“Maybe we will,” Gigi responds, raising an eyebrow. “Crystal, I think I left something in my car that I need some help with.”

“Oh, yeah, the um… the thing!” Crystal stutters out.

Gigi stands, motioning for Crystal to follow her.

“I’ll see you girls later tonight! And Jan, make sure to be on time for warm-ups today!” Gigi calls out, waving back at Jackie and Jan.

“How much longer do we even have at lunch?” Crystal asks once they’re in the parking lot.

“I don’t know, probably fifteen minutes,” Gigi guesses.

They walk briskly to Gigi’s car, and the second the doors shut behind them, Gigi captures Crystal’s lips in a heated kiss.

Crystal is sure that she’ll never get tired of the way that Gigi’s plump lips move softly against her own or the way that Gigi’s hands feel gripping her hips or the way that Gigi always bites down softly on Crystal’s bottom lip after she lightly drags her tongue across it. It’s all nothing short of magic.

Their kissing becomes increasingly passionate, and before Crystal knows it, Gigi tentatively moves her hands below the older girl’s shirt. Crystal lets out a quiet moan as Gigi’s hands make their way up her hips, her fingertips ghosting over Crystal’s ribcage.

Crystal knows this is all very “high school”; her best friends at home had countless stories about making out - or more - with boys in their cars. Crystal never thought she’d be one of them, but here she was, teenage hormones raging.

Crystal’s breath hitches when Gigi’s fingers brush over the side of her chest. Gigi breaks the kiss, still not moving more than a few centimeters away from Crystal.

“Is… that okay?” she whispers.

Crystal nods, reconnecting their lips.

Gigi hesitantly places one of her hands over Crystal’s breast and gently presses her hand against it, eliciting a slight gasp from the shorter girl. The blonde caresses her chest, and Crystal can feel her heart racing. She can’t think about anything but Gigi: Gigi’s hand moving languidly against the fabric of her bra, the feeling of Gigi’s heartbeat, the taste of Gigi’s breath in her mouth…

They’re interrupted when the lunch bell rings out, loudly enough that the two can hear it even from the confines of Gigi’s car.

“Fuck,” Gigi stammers.

“We should uh, get going,” Crystal attempts to slow her breathing.

“Definitely,” Gigi agrees breathlessly.

“That was…”

“Yeah.”

“We should… try that again, not in your car,” Crystal says, her cheeks pink. She almost wants to laugh at how completely and utterly cliché this situation is: if they weren’t both girls, would this not be equivalent to the quintessential high school experience of getting felt up in some boy’s car?

“I’d like that,” Gigi says, regaining her composure. “Ready to go?”

“Yep,” Crystal says, adjusting her shirt.

They walk into the gates of the school, parting ways at the entrance.

Crystal realizes she’s still wearing Gigi’s letterman’s jacket and smiles.

“You did what?!” Jackie yells, wide-eyed.

Crystal and Jackie are sitting in Crystal’s bedroom, getting ready to go to the football game. Crystal could care less about supporting her school’s team, or “school spirit” as Jan referred to it, but she painted purple and white streaks on her cheeks anyways. If anything, she thinks Gigi will find it cute.

“Yeah,” Crystal replies to Jackie sheepishly.

“Weren’t you scared of someone seeing?! Not even a student, but like, a teacher!”

“Not really, my mind was… elsewhere,” Crystal replies honestly.

“You’re braver than I am, I’ll give you that,” Jackie mimics Crystal’s idea, dragging purple and white face paint across her own cheeks. “I’m scared to even kiss Jan on the cheek in the car. Or anywhere on campus.”

“Yeah, it might not have been the most responsible idea, in retrospect,” Crystal admits.

“Just be careful, I’d hate for people to find out about you guys,” Jackie warns.

“I don’t plan on people finding out,” Crystal assures her. “On that topic, what’s the deal with Jan’s mom?”

“What do you mean?”

“She just… knows about you guys? And lets you have sleepovers?” Crystal elaborates.

“Yeah,” Jackie smiles. “I remember the day her mom found out. We were laying in her backyard, drinking smoothies, and her mom was supposed to be at the gym. She got home early, I guess, and saw Jan lean in and kiss me.”

“What did she do?”

“She knocked on the window and Jan completely freaked out. She ran inside, and her mom apparently just asked if we were dating, and Jan tried to say it was nothing and completely innocent. Her mom didn’t buy it, and walked outside and asked me . I can’t lie, and I thought she was angry, so I said yes and offered to leave.”

“Was she mad?”

“Oh god no. She gave Jan a hug, and gave me a hug, and said she was happy that if Jan was going to be dating in high school, it was someone like me. It was the first time I’d ever heard that,” Jackie’s eyes light up.

“That’s insane, and really sweet,” Crystal muses. “My parents are both really great, but I doubt they’d respond like that.”

“Mine definitely wouldn’t. I’d be disowned in a second.”

“I’m sorry, Jackie,” Crystal sympathizes.

“Don’t be. Jan’s mom does a good enough job at making me feel like I’m a part of their family.”

The two spend the rest of the time getting ready in relative silence. Six o’clock rolls around, and the pair make their way downstairs to ask if Crystal’s mom can drop them off. Jackie doesn’t want to deal with parking at school during a football game.

“Hey mom! We’re ready to go,” Crystal tells her.

Her mom looks up at her from the book she’s reading. “Oh honey, you two look adorable !”

“Thanks,” Crystal smiles.

“Do you need me to pick you up?” Crystal’s mom asks.

“No, I think we’re staying over at Jan’s - Gigi will drive.”

“Sounds good!” Crystal’s mom grabs her keys. “Let’s get going, then!”

The car ride is short and sweet; it’s filled with small-talk and her mom’s bad taste in music.

“Have fun and be safe, girls!” Crystal’s mom calls out as the two exit the car.

Crystal waves, telling her mom that she loves her, and sets off towards the bleachers with Jackie.

“So, if I’m being completely honest, I don’t uh, really want to sit in the back the whole time,” Crystal laughs.

“Oh?”

“I mean, I wanna like, cheer on Gigi or whatever,” she says. Crystal is wearing the blonde’s letterman’s jacket, and she feels like the girlfriend of the high school quarterback.

Except she isn’t Gigi’s girlfriend and Gigi is the head cheerleader.

“That’s… cute. Okay, well, fine by me,” Jackie shrugs.

The two sit several rows back from the front, far enough away from the over-zealous fans but close enough that they can still see the field, waiting for the game to start.

“Do you come to these much?” Crystal asks.

“Not as much as Jan would like, I’m sure,” Jackie shares. “I guess now that I have you to come with, I’ll come more.”

“It’s like a reverse double-date, or something,” Crystal laughs. “I never thought I’d be sitting at a football game for a girl .”

“I never thought I’d actually make a friend at this school,” Jackie says seriously, attempting to cover the serious nature of her statement with a laugh.

“Come on, you have other friends, right?”

Jackie shakes her head. “I came out and everyone dropped like flies. That and being the weird Persian kid kind of kills my ability to have a social life.”

“Geeze, I’m sorry, Jackie.”

“Hey, I’ve got you and Jan, and oddly enough, Gigi is back in my life, so I can’t complain, can I?”

The game starts, and all of the football players make their way onto the field. The cheerleaders run out shortly after, and Crystal cranes her neck to see her favorite blonde. She stands front and center, leading both the audience and the squad in chants. Gigi is bubbly and upbeat and in her element; she dances and kicks and does the splits and Crystal is nothing short of amazed by her. Next to her, Jackie smiles at Jan and waves to her several times when the squad has a break. Jan beams up at her, waving back each time.

Crystal couldn’t say who won the game, or how many points were scored; she knows next to nothing about sports and was far more entertained by watching Gigi down on the field than the game itself. When the game is over, she and Jackie make their way down to the field to wait for their respective blondes.

Crystal sees Gigi emerge from the field, a smile painted across her face.

“Gi, you were awesome!” Crystal grins, hugging her.

“I’m glad you had fun!” Gigi says enthusiastically.

“Sorry that I sort of stole your jacket,” Crystal apologizes. “You probably wanted it during the game.”

“It looks much cuter on you,” Gigi winks. “Plus, I kind of like seeing you in my jacket.”

“Gross!” Jan jokes, elbowing Gigi. “Are you lovebirds ready to go?”

“I’m ready,” Crystal nods, and Gigi agrees.

“Great! Mom said she’d order pizza for us all!”

The four head to Gigi’s car; it’s less than a five minute drive to Jan’s house from the school.

Jan’s house is surprisingly large; Crystal isn’t used to the gigantic houses that seem to line the streets in Los Angeles. Jan unlocks the door, yelling to tell her mom that she’s home.

Jan’s mom emerges from the kitchen, approaching the door.

“Hi, sweetie, how was the game?” she hugs Jan.

“It was good, we won!” Jan tells her.

“Hello, Jackie!” Jan’s mom moves to hug her daughter’s girlfriend. “You look adorable with your face painted like that!”

“Thank you! It was Crystal’s idea.”

Jan’s mom turns to look at Crystal. “You must be Crystal, the girls have told me so much about you! It’s so nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you, too!” Crystal reaches out to shake her hand, and much like her own mother, Jan’s mom pulls her into a hug.

“We’re big on hugs here, handshakes are for strangers!”

Crystal laughs; she thinks her mom would get along swimmingly with Jan’s.

“And Gigi, you don’t get to avoid my hugs, either!” Gigi laughs as she’s wrapped in a hug. “I’m so glad to see that you aren’t third-wheeling with these two anymore!”

“Hey, she never third-wheels!” Jan laughs, faux-scowling at her mom.

“Well, I’m just happy you have a girlfriend, it’ll give you all some super fun double-dates, I’m sure! You make a cute couple!”

“Oh, we’re not gi-” Crystal begins to correct her before Gigi talks.

“Thank you, hopefully Crystal can get Jackie out to more games!” Gigi jokes.

“Let’s hope! Anyways, what kind of pizza do you girls want?”

The four sit on Jan’s living room floor, eating pizza on a mountain of sleeping bags and pillows as It plays in the background. Jackie is cowering into Jan, clearly terrified of the movie that her girlfriend insisted that they watch.

Crystal has seen it before - it’s one of her favorites - and Gigi seems almost as freaked out as Jackie is. The blonde has trapped Crystal’s hand in a death grip and Crystal swears her fingers are losing circulation. She can’t bring herself to care; the sensation of Gigi’s hand in her own is inarguably one of her favorite feelings.

“Why did we have to watch this movie?” Jackie squeaks out. “It’s so… violent.”

“It’s a masterpiece, babe!” Jan debates.

“It’s gory.”

“It’s interesting!”

“Whatever you say, darling,” Jackie says, continuing to hide behind Jan.

Crystal has to stifle a laugh - their exchange is adorably hilarious, and she thinks that they’re perfect for each other. She looks down at Gigi, who has buried her head in Crystal’s arm, and squeezes the blonde’s hand.

Her mind wanders as the movie plays on. Gigi didn’t tell Jan’s mom that they weren’t girlfriends and wonders if Gigi is interested in being exclusive. Crystal hasn’t thought about it much until this point - she’s been enjoying living in the moment with Gigi - but now the thought won’t leave her mind.

She can see herself in a relationship with Gigi easily. They’ll go on dates and fall asleep next to each other and surprise each other with flowers and Crystal will show up at all of Gigi’s cheer events with enthusiasm. She wants to wear the letterman’s jacket every day, and she never wants to go a day without feeling Gigi’s fingers intertwined with her own.

Crystal’s thoughts trail on until the end of the movie. Jackie has fallen asleep in Jan’s lap and Jan is lazily stroking her curly, dark hair as she, too, begins to drift off. Gigi is wide awake, still clutching Crystal’s hand.

“Do you wanna go sit on the porch?” Gigi asks Crystal quietly.

Crystal nods, and the two stand. Gigi has clearly been over to Jan’s house enough that she knows exactly where to go, because she leads Crystal to a sliding glass door. They sit down on the wooden porch in Jan’s backyard, and Crystal lets out a contented sigh as Gigi plants a kiss on her cheek.

“Thanks for coming tonight. It really, really means a lot to me, Crys.”

“Hey, of course. I like watching you, you look so happy when you’re cheering.”

“Not as happy as I am when I’m with you,” Gigi hums.

“That was cheesy,” Crystal jokes, wrapping her arm around the blonde.

“Look what you’ve done to me, Crystal Elizabeth. You’ve turned me into a complete dork! I’m almost as bad as Jan!” Gigi jokes.

Crystal can feel butterflies fluttering around in her stomach when Gigi uses her middle name - it feels like a term of endearment.

“Who said dorky was a bad thing? I happen to think your dorky comments are adorable - or should I say, adorkable!” Crystal laughs.

“Okay, now that was bad,” Gigi snorts.

“You love it.”

“I know.”

The two sit in silence, wrapped up in each other’s arms, enjoying the cool night air.

“I actually wanted to talk to you about something,” Gigi breaks the silence.

“What’s up?” Crystal asks.

“I hate to be that girl that asks this question, but like… what is this?”

Crystal doesn’t know how to answer - she doesn’t know what will be too much for Gigi and doesn’t want to scare the girl off. She doesn’t want to look inexperienced and over-eager.

“I, uh, I don’t know. I haven’t thought about it,” Crystal lies.

“Oh.”

“Not that I don’t want to think about it!” Crystal quickly follows up. “What do you think this is?”

“Hey, not fair! I asked you first!” Gigi giggles.

“I mean, I really like you. Enough that I went to my first high school football game in four years for you.”

“I really like you too, Crystal.”

“So…” Crystal trails off, avoiding the question she knows she needs to ask.

“You’re going to make me be the one to say it, aren’t you?”

“I have no idea what you mean,” Crystal feigns innocence.

“Crystal, I want you to be my girlfriend,” Gigi declares.

Crystal presses a light kiss on Gigi’s lips before replying.

“Gi, I want nothing more than to be your girlfriend.”

Gigi leans her head on Crystal’s shoulder and throws her arms around the older girl’s waist. Crystal runs her fingers through her blonde hair, pressing gentle kisses to the top of her head as the two sit in a comfortable quietness.

Crystal can’t think of anything better than this.

#rpdr fanfiction #gigi goode #crystal methyd #jackie cox #jan sport #crygi #high school au #lesbian au #ms california #mik #concrit welcome #(please review formatting guides. thanks! -v)#s12

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brewbellwizardry · 4 years

Text

Wiztober Day 1 - Schools

“Welcome to Ravenwood!”

Emory swept a dramatic arm around the spacious room, particles of magic fluttering out of the way as they stepped through the spiral door. They glanced back to make sure their entourage was still in one piece.

Sure enough they were, Taane letting his jaw hang on its hinges as he lifted his eyes up, and up, and up, trying to drink in everything at once. His eyelids shuttered noisily a few times at the bright light filtering in through the highest parts of the canopies and he held Cecil’s slim hand a little closer. They were in a wide circular space filled with trees- and made of trees, for that matter. He could hear the distinctive buzz of magic in the air around them.

He’d never seen anything quite like it in Celestia, not even in the floating lands.

“I understand why it’s called Ravenwood now. There are so many trees!” He twisted around to look at them all, his hollow voice ringing unusually in the wide room.

“Oh, err, I guess!” Emory chuckled, shifting from foot to foot. “This is the spiral chamber, the school is outside that door there.” They pointed across the room, Taane and Cecil following their arm to a red door that stood out against the natural browns and greens. “Do you guys want to check out the schools right away?”

“Yes!” They answered together. Both their smooth faces, metal and wooden, were unchanging, but their voices had noticeably brightened.

“Okay, we’ll start with Professor Balestrom, cause uh, he’s least likely to yell at us for interrupting.” They grinned nervously, thinking about the scolding they were sure to get from Cyrus.

Well, they’d cross that bridge when they got to it.

They had led the two constructs to the storm school, Cecil staring openly at all the brightly robed wizards they passed on their way over. Cecil had tugged at the collar of their soft grey cloak self consciously, wondering how they could enjoy wearing robes in such deadly shades of yellow and red. They had to jog to catch up with Emory and Taane who were waiting for them in front of the classroom.

Once they were all there Emory swung the doors open wide, walked in and-

“Merlin’s fucking beard!”

Emory swore loudly and grabbed the fronts of Taane and Cecil’s robes to pull them down to the floor, Cecil making a loud garbled buzzing in surprise. A fizzing noise went over their heads and Emory flinched at the unmistakable crackle of lightning hitting wood behind them.

Looking up to make sure the coast was clear, Emory found a group of wide eyed Diviners staring back at them, Balestrom stood green and froggy on his desk with his cane still pointed where the trio’s heads had just been.

“Professor, I didn’t realise you were doing p-practicals today.” They managed to breathe shakily.

He finally lowered his cane with a flourish, beaming down at the three of them awkwardly sat on the classroom floor. “Every day is a practical day! You know the rule, young wizard, always knock on a diviner’s door before entering!”

“No I- I didn’t know that, actually.”

“Hmm? Oh, that is a bit of a problem, isn’t it?”

“Maybe you should make a sign, professor?”

“A marvelous idea young Erin!” Balestrom leapt off the desk and padded his way down the runner rug until he was face to face with Cecil, who pulled their knees up to their chest in discomfort. “Fascinating, simply fascinating! And why might these constructs be here, young Emory? Are they in need of repairs?”

“Oh, no! Not at all. That’s Cecil, and this is Taane. They’re from Celestia, we’re doing the rounds.”

“Hi Taane! Hi Cecil!” A bouncy voice Emory recognised as Keelan’s called out from behind the crowd. “You didn’t get shocked, did ya?”

“No!” Taane chuffed, tapping his fingers against the floor happily. “Not this time!”

With a terse chuckle Emory climbed to their feet and extended a hand to their friends on the floor. They didn’t particularly want there to be a next time.

When they arrived at the ice school Emory knocked once, twice, thrice before entering. “Professor Greyrose? Any spells we should be minding?”

“No no, come in, dear!”

They gave a relieved look to their companions, and though neither could mirror the expression Taane placed a hand on their shoulder while Cecil nodded sagely. They understood.

Already acquainted with the unholy chill of the ice classroom Emory pulled their cloak tighter around themselves as they pulled open the door. The air from inside spilled out as a dense fog, and already the atmosphere of the class was in stark contrast to the one they’d visited prior. All the students were sitting in neat rows, Greyrose at the blackboard, and the sound of pencils scratching at paper seemed endless. It didn’t halt or change as they walked into the classroom, most students too focused on copying an amount of writing that would bring Emory to tears if they saw it in their own classes.

They saw one student turn blatantly in their chair only to be elbowed by the one sitting next to them, and with a grumble they’d returned to their work.

“Professor, these two are visiting the schools to learn about them, do you think you could tell them about thaumaturgy?”

Greyrose hovered in place, tipping her hat to her visitors with a warm smile. “Oh, but of course! Now, where to begin? You see when the spiral was first sung into existence-”

Oh dear, Emory thought, they were going to be here a while, weren’t they?

“Next up is the fire school with Professor Falmea, you’re gonna want to mind your feet, the floor can get kinda uh, temperamental.” Emory pulled one of the doors open and got hit by a wave of hot air immediately, blinking fast as their eyes started to water.

Taane took one look at the red hot floors and the fire based decorations and opened and closed his mouth with an audible ‘clack’.

No. He wasn’t walking into that death trap. It just wasn’t happening.

Without a word he turned and walked away, sitting down on the curb opposite the building and neatly tucking his coat over his folded up legs.

Emory watched him with curiosity. “Err, Taane? Is something wrong?”

Cecil tugged on their shirt sleeve and they turned to them, very aware of the fact they were loitering in the doorway and that the pyromancers in the room had started to turn and stare. “Being made of wood means he’s not exactly fireproof. Less than you or I, anyway.” They murmured.

Emory’s mouth formed an ‘o’, slightly misshapen by their fangs, and they nodded. “Right, no, yeah, I don’t want anyone catching on fire. Are you interested, Cecil?”

They eyed the bright robes, the mustard yellows and fire reds they’d seen before outside.

“No, not particularly.”

“Alright. Sorry, professor!”

“Just close the door already!”

Emory tried not to seem too eager, or embarrassed, about the crater of the sunken death school. On the one hand it was their own school and they took a great deal of pride in it, unconventional though it may be, but on the other they knew not everyone viewed it with the same endearment.

But despite their efforts they couldn’t help their long ears pricking up as they spotted the small circle of black and red surrounding a standing figure. “Hey, Malorn!”

Malorn turned his head left and right before spotting them. “Oh! Emory! You bringing more students for me to ruin?”

Laughing nervously Emory looked back at Cecil and Taane. “Ahaha, he’s joking, I swear he’s joking.”

Taane clicked his fingers together with a stilted laugh, pressing past Emory straight towards the circle of students where he took a seat on the edges. This young teacher had good humour and this was the first class he had seen outdoors- how dreadful it would be to stay cooped inside all day, he wasn’t sure he could bear it.

Cecil wandered over more hesitantly, a bit put off by the wicked grin of the student teacher, and sat down next to Taane.

“Welcome to our flock of black sheep, haha! Get it?”

“Gods, Malorn.” Emory groaned.

The myth classroom was one they had been particularly dreading, and Cecil seemed to have picked up on that if the way they were standing a good foot from the door was anything to go by.

And given body language was just about all Emory had to go off when they weren’t speaking, they figured it must be so.

“So uhh, the teacher for the myth school is Professor Cyrus Drake, and he can be… difficult.” They paused, took a deep breath, then knocked on the door. “Professor?”

“Class is in session. Go. Away.”

“Professor, there’s some new students here, we’re having a look at the different schools and-”

“I am busy with my present students, I don’t need any more. Go. Away.”

“Hmm.” Emory pulled a face. “So uh, this is not ideal, but I can probably tell you a bit about conjuring? Unless you guys really want to see the classroom, then we can! But I uh,” They cast a dubious look at the door, “I don’t think it’ll go over well.”

Taane shrugged and looked to Cecil, who shrugged and looked to Emory. “You’re the tour guide.”

“Alrighty, so conjuring-”

Taane had been taken by the life school the minute they’d approached it, head on swivel looking at all the flora and fauna that always flocked wherever theurgists gathered. He held a hand up to the sky and Emory had watched in awe as a sparrow landed on one of his outstretched fingers, delicate toes curled around the smooth wood like it was just another branch.

“I like this one.” He spoke, enamoured with the way the small bird hopped around the digits of his hand. Cecil leaned forward to look, having to stand right on the tips of their toes to see properly.

“You have always liked small creatures and plants, Taane.”

While they lingered in the yard outside the life school students started spilling out the doors, books and wands in hand. A lady in green, Professor Wu, was the last out of the classroom and the trio watched with interest as the group of students arranged themselves around the trees outside. One student with a deer’s lower body stayed standing, but the rest sat on the ground.

“Oh, I really like this one.” Taane made a beeline for the other students, settling himself in like he already belonged there. A few students gave him odd looks, but he paid them no mind. Cecil hung back with Emory, making a small laugh-like sound at their friend’s enthusiasm. This definitely suited him.

“And lucky last, this is where the balance students stay. The actual school is in another world, but we still have a teacher here too for the beginner students. I always found balance magic really difficult, honestly. The sand is too hard to keep together.” Cecil had latched on to Emory’s hand the minute they’d split off from Taane, who had been eager to sit in on the rest of the lesson Professor Wu was teaching, so they noticed right away when Cecil stopped walking in the middle of the balance campgrounds. Emory looked down at them, concerned. “What’s up?”

“This magic… it’s not the kind I was looking for either.” Their tone was morose, and Emory frowned.

“No? Not this one either?”

They shook their head, pulling their cloak up around their mouth so their voice was muffled. “It's not the right one. The one I was looking for… it’s not any of these. I was hoping to see those shadows again, the ones that moved like mist. They were so pretty.”

Oh! Emory hit their hand against their palm with a smile “Cecil, I think I know what you’re looking for! That’s Shadow magic!”

“It is? Where is it taught?”

Oh. Emory shifted uncomfortably, knowing they were going to let them down again. “Err, well, it’s not exactly taught here in Ravenwood. Ambrose thinks it’s too dangerous.”

“But… all schools of magic are dangerous.” Cecil tilted their head questioningly.

“Well, yeah, that’s true, but... I’m sorry, Cecil. Were there any other schools that you liked?”

They made a low buzzing hum, considering for a few moments. “I liked some of them, but none of them felt right. If there’s no shadow magic here, I think…”

“...I think I’m going to find my own school.”

#wizard101 #w101 #OCs #wiztober2020 #writing #Cecil #whEW #this is really just self indulgent #but i hope yall enjoy it too!#i love these kids so much ahbdshjb #emory earthwhisper #Taane

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davidjjohnston3 · 3 years

Text

The trees are straight and true here, and the help comes without seeming harpoons. I considered some insane things which were ‘above my pay-grade’ and as is my wont reflected on the state and implications of my former profession and what old friends and pharons meant to me. Right now think that my core goal in life is not to blow myself up. As a former would-have-been SecState said, ‘I love so many people.’ I am only sad that trying as I did to uproot that carrot of love just now could have resulted in the demolition of an entire root-network, of at least my own excision therefrom.

‘Some people’ want revenge against life for not going their way or not being the color or fragrance or face shape they like or feel it ought to be - ‘no that is not what I meant at all.’ They will never hold a life reliable which doesn’t resemble their ideal, imago, or ‘soul-idol’ &c. The meaning of the name ‘Cordelia’ as in King Lear is something like ‘heart’s ideal.’ I was driving and considering a novel that I feel touched absolute supreme greatness without knowing it or in a way that could mislead some readers Mrs. Mary HK Choi’s Yolk a novel I looked forward for a very long time. I had all these references and fractal coreferences and forgot about actual birds, like what does the chick eat in the egg.

‘Blood is the life’ - I liked etymologies for a long time and my intellectualism caused me acute trouble in Confirmation Class at Morrow Memorial United Methodist Church in about 1998. ‘Pastor’ Gretchen taught us the word root ‘consacramentum’ which comes from dipping the hand in blood in the concave of a Roman shield - those huge rectangular shields which could be used in formation as ‘testudo’ or turtle to stop projectile weapons and allowed soldiers to make pin-point stabbing attacks from a ‘matrix(?)’ of high protection. I forget what kind of animal was killed to pool the blood in the shield but it might have been a rabbit.

I was reading ‘Revelation,’ I don’t recall what everyone else was talking about. Some kind of community service project, interview your parents, buy a wedding-magazine and make a whole plan for how you would get married and how much it would cost (and while you’re at it describe how you would 1) restore a classic Shelby Cobra using newspaper and Krazy Glue 2) drive foresaid drop-top to the Moon).

The Pastor was a pipe-smoker named ‘Painter’ who used the NY Lotto’s ‘Hey you never know’ slogan to describe sth like Pascal’s Wager; OTOH St. Paul teaches us that everyone is born knowing God exists (Romans). The problem is that people fail or omit to glorify Him or subsequently ruin or betray their own best efforts through blasphemy, turning or falling away, cowardice, denial, attachment to certain sins or being ‘yoked unequally’ with non-believers.

I reflected starting in 2008 that I was shy of my ‘first love’ (rather, the woman I fell in love with at 14); at the time I gloried or reveled in the shyness like a Wallace Stevens poem that ends, ‘And not to have written a book.’ I could’ve written a few books by now or walked away from book-writing or changed my mind / specified which kind of book I might have written and for whom.

I remember always admiring the ‘magic’ of literature and feeling sad I had no characters or world of my own to work magic with. Star Wars and my own life and later much else supplied ‘materia poetica’ and till the point that I began to think in fiction and became addicted to interpreting my own in ‘story-ideas’ although that is not to say that what happened around me didn’t happen.

America is trying to become a better country in numerous valences, loving our neighbors, holding each other accountable. ‘Justice’ with or without the marks is important. It is a divine Judgment that Covid fell on the world even if eventually we all shall learn who devised the virus or leaked it or modulated its mutations. I was eager to rejoin the world feeling I might overcome my mental illness but I mishandled specific questions and tests. I ended up turning people against me and creating monsters more than ever as well as perhaps terminally sabotaging any chance I might’ve had of fulfilling a dream or making good on the past. I have a lot of opinions on the CCP but should’ve focused on love and family and personal responsibilities as in the past or at least held to my long-standing feeling that Chinese people deserve better rather than associating myself with hard-liners and racists or those who would simplify issues in order to bring about ultimate victory without temperance or concern for the side-effects.

In Milwaukee where I lived for far too long everyone’s spirit - electric, intellectual, visory(?), informational et cetera seemed to be militating against everybody else’s. There were fake vaccines, radioactive ice cream (or thermogenic ice-cream), gun-battles as usual, lines crossed, all kinds of scores that people tried to settle. I also realized that the police were probably tracking for years my various attempts to obtain weapons from samurai-swords to handguns though the purpose was defensive and I can only trust at this point that some good lawyer will prevent the bad lawyers and cops from presenting the most damning circumstantial case they could. People in Milwaukee own AK-47′s, automatic shotguns, probably all kinds of explosives, improvised chemical weapons and (’our Black brothers’ - Schopenhauer) biological weapons - the cops don’t stand a chance that I can tell and even the National Guard perhaps could get outclassed by retired military. I had told myself for years that it was only the ghetto’s that bore witness to this paramilitary equipage and that the retired SEAL Team 4 member with the ‘Stop Socialism’ and ‘Jobs Not Mobs’ sign on his front lawn would protect me from the Maoist-Covid Night of the Long Knives but I feel I tempted God a lot in the past.

I read all these books and took to heart that people thought I was just entertaining myself with but now as then I should’ve guarded my heart or not begged the question of what others thought about me or saw in me. I literally felt of late ‘I am the anti-Christ’ - good-looking at times, preach world peace, ‘form of godliness,’ want to be friends with everyone, build bridges - and had to rack my brains to come up with an ‘anti-Christology’ and science / concept of the Whore of Babylon just to make sure it was more than me alone. I also wished to simplify my past and help kids ‘get life right the right time’ doing battle with philosophies that opposed this consciously or otherwise but stepped into numerous minefields and also tried running when I should’ve flown over.

Everyone’s trying to get rich and build back better and I profoundly admired the American President for doing, finally, apparently, what presidents had tried to decades even as I remember ‘Flowers 1881′ a poem that implies that basically teachers can do only so much before turning their kids loose in a world no one has yet fixed and which others keep breaking; from a California almanac that also instructed me that the same old debates and cross-fires and burdens plague teachers as always, not that it is an ‘impossible profession’ but honestly that God won’t let us establish Heaven on Earth or at least not me or at least not America or at least not teachers who savor the experience of being a teacher or the beauty of their students more than the outcomes or commitment or intrinsic value of the work or the confirmed identity / vocation / personhood of the instructor. There are always new and old at any rate and different cultures all describe the teacher as needing to keep both alive; as do descriptions of higher education and scholarship.

I questioned my qualifications / background and wondered about re-training but can’t afford tuition anywhere so I am trying to cling to the core of my capabilities / blessings. ABC and XYZ. The glory of the soul or souls.

I kept theorizing Russian literature as well as weapons-systems and ultimate destiny, sailing ships, noble names, divisions, the flaming sword of Archangel Gabriel, the mission of Russia today with respect to the world order. I am also simply trying to be healthy and stop for a while trying to parse out who was the love of my life or what it still left in terms of action or redemption or justice or surrender or mitigation or meeting new friends or propounding the kind of understand with carefulness I have believed in - ‘saving people from themselves.’ Driving up here I remember being distressed at a gas-station in California when I was about 5 or 6 since the pump was leaking, being very upset with my parents and family. In those days I also disliked animal-cruelty though the world today seems so depraved and deprived with respect to human interests I would make no bones about neglecting most all animals outside of military or police use. When I was about 3 I saw white kids set a frog on fire; my mother has a history of running over cats.

I dislike winging it and taking risks. There is a song I call to myself ‘Run Away’ though its title is ‘Paradise.’ I am not a utopian communist for believing in secular justice and its instrinsic value... I wonder whether when I helped people in the past there were always strings attached or maybe I was just trying to close my case and discharge my responsibilities too rapidly without allowing others to gestate or make an abode in my heart besides and beyond what I could get out of them, glorifying myself, or tell others about.

What is motherhood? What is travail? Is there a kind of problematic ‘female gaze’ as feminists talk of a ‘male gaze’ associated with sadism or fascination / fetishism? It’s psychology which is not my first love at all since it appeared pretentious and distracting and retarding (in the literal sense of slowing down).

I also remembered reading various things about Victor Hugo whose ‘93′ is an important novel today due to its techno-utopianism, feminism or ‘new model egalitarianism,’ fusion of revolution and religion, etc. But I had forgotten ‘Les Miserable’ with its themes of ransom or eventual recompense, genealogies, caution, and more none of which is to negate the various complains against me or death-warrant from China or my parents with their partial private readings of Proverbs (’Let’s stone David for embarrassing us / not doing precisely what we want’ - no mention of witnesses, tribunals, questions, mitigation-hearings, actual counsels of judges etc. but just American-German ‘coalitions of the willing’ ‘run and get my gun’ ‘team-building’ etc. which in my experience ends with tanks on the street and military dictatorships as when at the end of the CultRev PLA regulars were gunning down former justice-fanatics who’d been stripping women, kicking pregnant stomachs etc. as in The Vagrants). Naturally having grown up in a family fascinated with Lee Kwanyew and Arnold Schwarzenegger and conflicted about ‘fascism’ I had reservations about the United States’ ability to suddenly dress up and ‘stand at perpetual moral attention’ but I guess my own problems are just that I am poor with a rich kid’s mind and no one really likes me except strangers and faraway friends who were easily spooked and/or just couldn’t be there. ‘King of South shall attack and King of North shall crush them with chariots &c.’ - in the end righteous will prevail whichever side of the line I end up on in the final assessment. I also remembered today a novel called ‘The Old Capital’ about a bad artist father, a virgin daughter, straight and true pines. Some other aspects of this novel are silly as well as criminally problematic and there's a lot of that going on in new-old old news America / Babylon or at least to quote my favorite lawyer / leave lawyering movie 'First let's get out of Milwaukee.' Miss the land of June snow.

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thestarwrites · 4 years

Text

All Right, All Might: Ch. 3

Word Count: 2,142

Rating: PG

Painting: Toshinori Yagi X FemOC

The UA Guidance Counselor, a quirk user with Pathokenesis, is shocked to find out her personal hero All Might is coming to be a teacher. The road they walk as a parallel starts to merge and there’s no telling what could happen.

CHAPTER THREE: UA HIGH SCHOOL ENTRANCE EXAM

For Patho, summer was full of being with and missing Toshinori. They had become dear friends, they texted, talked on the phone - and went out, as friends of course, in his weakened form. Whenever he was on television, she would text him. And when he had a particularly bad fight, he would need to talk through some things.

Summer was drawing to a close, and her second year at UA, and his first, was fast approaching. Entry exams were only a week away. She had been through this once before, but wasn’t installed enough yet to be there.

And then that Saturday;

[Text: Toshinori] Hey! You’ll never guess what I’ve been doing. A smile crossed her lips.

[Text: Keri] Eating copious amounts of ice cream, even though your stomach can’t take it and it’ll make you ill?

[Text: Toshinori] No…. [Text: Toshinori] I wouldn’t do that. [Text: Toshinori] You can’t prove i’ve ever done that…

[Text:Keri] :P What have you been doing?

[Text: Toshinori] I found a successor! I’ve been training him! You’d love him.

[Text:Keri] As much as you?

[Text:Toshinori] More.

[Text:Keri] I doubt it, Tosh.

[Text:Toshinori] Do you want to meet him? He’s going to be taking the entrance exam. He cries a lot, he’s a really sensitive kid! His name is Izuku Midoriya! He’s this quirk-less kid, and he’s so brave, Ree.

[Text:Keri] I would love to meet him.

[Text:Toshinori] C: !! The three of us can meet for lunch tomorrow??? Pleeeaseee say yes!

[Text:Keri] Okay okay, don’t get all mopey like you get.

[Text:Toshinori] I have never been mopey in my life.

[Text:Keri] Now THAT is the biggest lie I have ever heard. [Text:Keri] You’re mopey all the time. [Text:Keri] I’ll see you tomorrow, goon.

His last text message was a big emoji of his All Might form, giving a grin and a big thumbs up. Shaking her head she smiled, “He’s such an idiot.”

ACROSS TOWN…

“I AM HERE—“ All Might burst out from an alley in front of Deku, “—YOUNG MIDORIYA!”

“AH! All might!! What are you doing here!?” He was dressed in sweats, he had been out running.

He grinned and then coughed out blood, shrinking into small-might, “I came to see if you wanted to go to lunch tomorrow, with me and another teacher at UA? I’d like for you to meet her, she’s a dear friend of mine.”

“You… want me to meet a friend of yours, All Might?”

He laughed, “Of course I do, young man. You’re my successor! And besides - she’s a great pro hero herself!”

“Wh-who is she!?” Deku’s eyes shone, thinking of the possibilities of who they could be. How strong this woman might be, what he might learn from her.

He pulled his hand to his chest, “Her hero name is Patho!”

Deku blinked and wet his lips, “The support hero? I didn’t even know you’d be acquainted with her, she’s not on many crime scenes- only natural disasters and emergencies…”

Toshinori turned, “She is a very dear friend. And she has an incredible quirk!” He huffed, “She is as passionate to help as you are, and I thought you two would get along. I want you to have a safe place to go in school if you get into UA- sometimes I wont be around, or I’ll be teaching. And besides, she knows about you, and my secret.”

“Ah- she knows? Wow… she must be really important to you, All Might.”

He blushed and cleared his throat, “Yes! As a friend!”

“You said that like three times…” He blinked.

“BECAUSE I MEAN IT. OKAY, I’ll see you tomorrow? We’ll go get lunch after our morning training! Don’t be late, young man.”

“Yes sir!” Deku nodded fiercely as he turned back into All Might and flew away.

——

Keri sat at a table outdoors at a cute little cafe her and Toshinori frequented when he needed to talk. Yawning slightly, she adjusted her UA hoodie, pulling her long hair into a side ponytail as she waited for her friend to show up with his protege.

“Hey!” A familiar voice called out, and when she looked up there he was, tall as a tree, with a boy with green hair. That must be Izuku.

Standing up when they got close she smiled, only a few inches taller than Deku, “You must be Izuku,” she held out her hand, “It’s an honor to meet you, I’m Keri Chairo.”

Izuku looked at her and smiled, shaking her hand, “The honor’s mine, Miss Chairo! It’s so amazing to meet a hero like you!”

Blushing she shot a look up to Toshinori who was beaming with pride, “You must be hungry! I’m sure Toshinori is a slave driver. Lunch is on me today, boys.”

“Oh!! Oh no you don’t have to —“ Izuku started.

“It’s my pleasure,” Keri smirked sincerely before pointing a look at All Might, “And don’t you even try to protest, I swear to god.”

He grunted and hung his head, “It’s like you can read my mind, I swear.”

Deku laughed softly and bowed, “Thank you…” When she sat down, he moved to sit and looked at All Might, who finally sat, “Your name is Toshinori?”

All Might looked to him, then to Keri and nodded, “Toshinori Yagi.” He smiled a bit, “So, Keri, this is Izuku Midoriya, who is as courageous and kind as anyone could be.”

The boys face turned bright red and the woman smiled, “I’d take that as gold, kid, Toshi is very high in his ideals - which - you no doubt know. You’re going to make a great addition to UA high.”

“I - I don’t even know how I’m going to get in but…”

Keri shushed him, “Toshi believes in you, and so I believe in you - you’ll be in classes come the fall, I’m sure. I bet we can expect great things from you.”

Deku felt his eyes water and he sniffed, “Thank you Miss Chairo…”

“This deserves a celebratory lunch! Pick whatever you want — Toshi don’t even think about picking anything with milk.”

The number one pro hero threw his hands up, “God, woman! You never let me do anything!”

For the next week, Keri didn’t see All Might at all. He went radio silent. She tried to reassure herself if was because he was so busy with training Izuku and getting settled with the High School for teaching. Though her anxiety was trying to tell her he was done with her. Shaking it off she went about her days, trying to get her own office together and go over how she was going to deal with being at the practical exam.

——

The day finally arrived. The UA Entrance Exam.

The teachers were all seated comfortably in the examination booth, all of the young hopefuls ready to tackle a simulated villain attack with robots. Keri took the seat beside All Might - noticing his hands trembling, she moved to take the one closest to her in the dark. He didn’t turn his head to look at her, but he did lace her fingers with his own to steady himself.

Toshinori felt her confidence radiating through him — he could get addicted to her quirk.

The others started, most of them quickly racking up points stopping robot after robot, while Deku looked around worried. She stroked her thumb across Toshinori’s skin, trying to calm his nerves.

“At this rate there won’t be any enemies left—“ He grunted under his breath.

She leaned close and whispered, “Give Izuku some time.”

Across the room, Midnight smirked and leaned into Aizawa, “Patho has gotten mighty cozy with All Might over the summer, wouldn’t you say, Eraser?”

He groaned, “Oh my god, I don’t care.”

“Do you think they’re a hot item? They’re holding hands.”

“Watch the mock-battle!” He grunted again, eyes never leaving the field.

“Clearly the examinees have no idea how many villains are on the field,” Principal Nezu began, “So they have to cover a vast area in a short amount of time… some are information gathering, some are focusing on raw speed and power, and some are remaining calm under pressure — all these are valuable and the students who implement them all will rack up the most points.” He punctuated his little speech with a nod.

“I’d say this years group looks very promising,” purred Midnight.

“Well,” Ectoplasm smirked, “There’s still plenty of time left before this is all over… let’s see how they react to this,” and with that he pressed a red button in the examination chamber.

Toshinori tensed, “Come on Midoriya.”

The events that unfolded with the zero-point robot were too horrific for Keri to take. She jumped out of her chair, “NEZU YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING— HE’S GOING TO KILL HIMSELF.”

All of the teachers sat frozen as they watched Izuku fall from the height of a skyscraper toward the ground. Keri ran to the window, gripping her hands together. Toshinori sat motionless, watching with horror - would the 9th wilder of One-for-all die before he even began?

The redhead— she saved him.

“TIME’S UP!!!!” Present Mike called out.

Just like that, it was over.

Keri moved to tear ass down to the battlefield, but when she had gotten into the stairwell away from the other teachers, she was grabbed by All Might in his full form, “PATHO, RESTRAIN YOURSELF.”

“He’s HURT, Toshinori! You’re responsible for—“ She had tears in her eyes.

His face for the first time since he met her, looked angry, “Midoriya knew what he was getting himself into.”

“NO! HE DIDN’T! YOU DIDN’T EVEN GIVE HIM ENOUGH TIME TO KNOW HIS LIMITS! HOW COULD YOU!” She let her tears fall, “YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT PEOPLE!”

He grunted and pulled away, “How could you accuse me or not caring?” He looked, hurt, “YOU of all people—“ He stepped back again, “I warned him not to act like a pro. I told him there was severe physical backlash. If you run out there now like a frightened CHILD, that’s what you will be to these students!”

She stared at him, embarrassed and angry.

“If you run out there, you will ruin what Izuku has done for himself!” He grunted, “I stopped you because I value you and him. But I guess despite all of your schooling, you can’t see that. You just see what you want to see, like everyone else. I thought you were different.”

Keri wiped her eyes, “If that’s what you want to see, Toshinori Yagi, then that’s what you see. I’m out of here.” She turned and started down the stairs, “You introduced me to Izuku, you made sure I had a vested interest in him, and now you don’t want me to feel the need to run to his aid when he has two broken fucking legs and a broken arm? You want us to be friends? Have fun with the rest of the teaching staff, this child is going home.”

All Might slammed his fist into a railing once she was out of sight, warping it almost to the ground. He felt blood in his throat, and he de-muscled as he coughed, holding onto the warped railing. Pulling out the handkerchief in his pocket to wipe his mouth he looked down at it a moment — at the K in the corner. His heart ached in his chest as he squeezed his eyes shut. He had to go back into the examination room — cover for her.

Wiping the blood from his lips, he went back in, “Patho has decided to head home, start working on her strategy with the students for when they start in a few weeks.”

Nezu nodded, he of course had heard the fight in the hall- they all had. It was better not to bring it up, “I’ll give her a phone call later so I can discuss it with her.” He gave a smile.

Toshi stuffed the soiled woman’s handkerchief in his pants pocket and sat down in his seat miserably as he watched Recovery Girl kiss young Midoriya better.

When Keri got home, she slammed her door shut, throwing her bag and shoes and some other things around before collapsing on the sofa in tears.

I thought you were different.

She clenched her teeth and curled into a ball, everything that happened in that wonderful summer - was their friendship over? Were things with her and All Might through? She wanted to text him, but she couldn’t. She said awful things to him, but he said just as awful things back to her.

There were two weeks before school started, and in that time, Keri and Toshinori did not speak. He was radio silent. But this time, she knew it was her fault.

#all might x oc #toshinori x oc #toshinori yagi #tw: argument #my hero academia fanfiction

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