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lanawinterscigarettes · 6 months ago

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Thank you aeron, I wish i wasn't like this in the first place but unfortunately here we are (not that i mean that against anyone else just myself) you definitely think im more amazing than i am, i just see it as like 'that thing i cant get rid of'

i tried to bring it up again but one of them apologised for being grouchy...lets see how long this lasts but the others don’t know and i upset one of them accidentally today in a gc so now i feel bad and like i cant bring anything up

one of my irls knew i read fanfics and i sent the tags of lady oswald (told you that was my fav fic) to a friend - who tbf already has an inkling but i keep brushing it off - they reverse image searched it and ended up reading more doctor who stuff than i did LOL i stick/stuck pretty much to my sweet sweet clara content whereas theyre in love with half the cast

hopefully they never see this ask! that will be v embarrassing

yeah im gonna call it gopiss girl 🫶

hope your food was nice!

nah my family are all outwardly homophobic (well, they pretend to be okay with it as long as its not in their family type of thing, they pride themselves on having a straight lineage and take bets on which family member will be the first one to come out as gay, and like, whisper about whos a secret gay its ridiculous) long story short it was definitely homophobically intented, but wtf does a gay person smell like, like if i have to define a gay smell i just start thinking of sweet, floral perfumes because thats the smell id be breathing in if i was cuddling with a girl (which part of me longs for but also part of me despises that i long for)

sorry again about the clara thing i feel bad for sending you so many clara requests and your writing is so good i just want more 😭 its my little escape for the world where i don’t have to be seen by anyone and no one can see me hence why i am a (hopefully) lovely anon instead

also on your page saw that gif thats like 'i am a f*cking star!* me i am star

oh cool! with the pronouns thing that sounds cool yeah i have no idea about gender ive had people explain it to me like 20 times i don’t think i will ever truly wrap my head around it but i try to be supportive

i know what a lavender marriage is id just be so concerned that everyone would think my husband is gay or that i would be so paranoid all the time that people would know, yknow - ugh its frustrating im just like, trying to figure out whether to sort of go down the get married traditionally and just be fruity secretly in my head, resign myself to being single forever or be in a lavender marriage but then again no one wants to be in one of those because they'll want to come out at some point and then it makes the girl look dumb or vice versa, and then if they're with someone romantically then you just feel like an idiot idk

sorry this is such a yap ive had a tough day

also thar description of demi kinda soudns like me i literally freak out anything to do with sex im like someones attractive but without clothes im just like 🏃‍♀️‍➡️ like i want it but im so terrified so idek

sending you love aeron and idk where sparkle went love you too

your fics are great aeron if you need validation there you go <3

- ⭐

I completely get what you mean, and I know this is such a tired and overused saying but your feelings ARE important and they DO matter, even if some people can't seem that 🫶

Okay but your friend being in love with half the cast of doctor who is so real because me too honestly 😭 and every time you mention a fic of mine that you love it always fills me with such joy even if you've already said it before 🥰

Gopiss girl 😭😭 I can't

It was!! It didn't last long though because I was hungry lmao

I also thought of floral scents for some reason when I thought of something "smelling gay" idk why either

It's not a problem at all, I promise! I don't mind writing a lot for clara because I also love her and I know it makes you happy which is the goal with my writing 🫶

That quote's always going to remind me of you from now on haha

I get it completely! I think it's okay to not understand something as long as you're supportive and respectful, which you are 🥰

It's completely okay to yap, and I get it. I just hope that someday you're able to get the happy ending you want without having to compromise or feel guilty because you definitely deserve that ❤️

See I didn't think I was demi either until I really looked into it and compared what it meant to what I feel and that's how I was like "Oh yeah I think that might be me" lmao

And you're so sweet star anon thank you so very much <3

#i hope things end up going better for you soon <3 #⭐️ anon #star anon #aeron answers

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emotionalyodeling · 2 years ago

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literally everything is falling apart. what else do i have that im not living truthfully about, because genuinely its strange. caden making me guess at him having a boner then confessing? and then being weird. and then zach stuff as well. what is going on, genuinely. and i didnt withdraw from class yesterday, i literal;ly just. forgot, like i did the first time. i didnt say anything to caden, i didnt say anything to max, i didnt say anything to naomi, i didnt say anything to my classmtaes. i just ignored it and stopped, ads soon as stuff got uncomfortable. i genuinely dont evewn know, but i feel like im losing control over my life, like the mom i sit for i basically ghosted. my friends are all new and i dont nkow if i even like them.

with the zach stuff i just am so confused. i looked back and i did tell him that i didnt wanna do sexual stuff, then he asked for secxual stuff and while i said yes, it is just. what. and then i comforted him through it, like all of it. he curledd into a ball and i comfotted him, and he let me,. or mostly what im upset about is that i let myself comfort him, and reassured him in the moment that i said yes in the moment so it was okay. but i didnt want to have sex, and just in general. him being so hroyn and annoying when he wakes upo horny and im not. lkike get a grip. go to the other room and jack off stop whining. i am not the one who should be facilitating this stuff. and keeping track is just so frustrating, and then my counselor telling me this is normal, i want to die bro. i dont want to live for the rest of my life having to fight off a horny man like my mom. i just want to not ever feel pressured especially by someone who is supposed to love me. like he knows that too. and just before there was so much to process, my family kevin i just shoiv ved it down because i couldnt lose anyone else. also the fact that even when we were t5rying to rebuild he still begged me to hug and kiss STOP. STOP IT HOLY FUCK. i literally want to like hit him thinking about that. and i lket it slide because, why. and even after that, there was masturbation stuff, there was the keeping track recently asnd constantly always having to be sad when he was horny. writing this i am so upset i cant even see love in that. im so sick of crying men, i am not comforting you, for assaulkting and being sexually uncomfortable with me. and the fafct that the cycle was going to start again. idk now that i think of it we started the relationship very sexual and not consent based, so maybe thats what he expects. but no. i am not accepting that. not for me or my future or for my children. i think carolyn jsut has an older mentality of oph yeah men are just like that, which i guess was okay for the time.

theres so much else to unpack here. caden idek. weird he got so strange. i think after Naomi i just really built a habit of just ignoring problems no matter what. but i think i just have a habit of that in general. max also is something im putting off. honestly ive just let everything in my life build up, i dont think i ever wanted to do healthcare, io just did it because i wanted to run away from naomi. zach i juist ignored that even though i knew if i told my friends about my problems they would just stop it. idk. one at a time i suppose, but reading back on this i dont really remember what happened to resolve these things. or if they ever were on his end, and its frustrating that i allowed that to go on for so long.

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neo-shitty · 4 years ago

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toffee!

hehe glad i could make you laugh, oooh that sounds awesome! yeah id love to be tagged it sounds great :)

YES the differences are so fucking weird. like, they do know they're the same age right? i feel like its just an exagguration of how much the persons role in the group matters, like we see chan being held up as such a mature, old leader while jungkook who is literally the same age, is still babied etc. like enha hyung line is basically the same age (if a bit younger) as chenle and jisung but somehow the rules are different?? as you point out, still legal but still bizarre. hehe yeah, i mean where else are we going to rant? quora lol. mmm, hopefully more people can just write less smut abt people who are barely adults

ah, no prob it didnt take long. yeah i think thats right (i keep forgetting you know my url lol) mmhmm :( i think if that happened irl there would be some major trauma going on. knock wood it never happens to you or me lol (/hj)

hehe same! oooh glad Redemption For Cheese was realised! yess we cant rllycomplain that theyve written/produced too much good music lol. yeah, ive dragged him into being a stay so *dusts hands off* mission accomplished. mmm yeah, they tend to have a certain vibe but tbh it couldve worked if they were any other group but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ahh ur one step ahead of me on the stages of listening to ssick i think, still not convinced but thats okay! hehe, it had to be said. yesss the itch in the back of my brain is very satisfied by sorry i love you, felixs vocals deserve to be appreciated! (side note i feel like hes trying to sing more like his speaking voice, sorta husky, but tbh i wouldnt be mad if he sang like in glow, his sweet honey vocals made my life lol. but i think ive heard him say he doesnt like singing like that cos it makes his normal voice less husky, so what can you do)

> YES SOMEONE SAID IT. seungmin rap KING, he sped thru that rap like it was nothing, he deserves more rap lines. i do like how they gave minho some melodic rap lines this comeback, my guy deserved to show off those skills that made him not be eliminated (flashbacks to stay collectively wanting to murder jyp) and we already know changbin can sing, my man murdered masked singer. hyunjin can obviously sing as can jisung and felix, and i want to hear chan rap more! i feel like he started as part of 3racha (as a rap unit not producing) and then just became a vocalist (which im fine with, but it could be nice to hear him flex his rapping skills) and was partially replaced by hyunjin. anywayyy

back to album talk. lmaooo sad music to twerk to PERFECTLY describes silent cry. yes secret secret is and will always be, a masterpiece. hehe glad i could make you laugh :) i just felt like they have similar vibes. putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised. oh my beloved track, red lights. ahh thats okay, we can have different opinions, but by god the lyrics are *chefs kiss*. *banging on table* TWISTED AU TWISTED AU TWISTED AU. yess id love to see ur take on it! sdfghjkl it would have been glorious

no no! not stupid, just able to predict my brainwaves. ooooh thats so cool! makes me want to go there (wherever there is lol) yeah the waves are pretty good here, but none of my familys a surfer, so we dont rlly enjoy the full potential lol. YES moving on to gone away, it is indeed a heartwrenching track, but the vocals and the bloody key change? makes me want to brave being sad just to listen to it. mmm yeah, good point :( i feel like ive just gotten used to overthinking so much so that it doesnt matter what mood im in, ill do it anyway, so might as well just do what i feel like doing anyway.

yeah i think ur right! it is quite comforting knowing that all the tracks will get the love they deserve. i feel like also people assume kpop is just one genre which is utter bs. there are so many different vibes and feels and songs, i couldnt get into kpop (of which i thought only the bright cheerful present day bts stuff existed smh) until i heard gods menu so... idk where i was going with this but yeah. :)

YES FUCK YG, theyre literally on the brink of being kicked out of the big three and they are holding their salvation hostage without letting them do ANYTHING. idek what thought process goes thru their minds but arghhh its so infuriating. yess lisa's cb will be awesome but ot4 is the gold standard here.

hehe, glad u could get to this point. no no! u dont sound like a cult member at all lol yeah, i loooove some of their songs but the whole 23 members thing is getting to me. thats prob a common problem with nctzens but what can i say? im a simple girl with a limit to how many korean boys i can give my money to. atm im just trying to get into ateez and finish memorising enhypen's faces. also kard is kinda sucking me into their fandom atm, as well as eric name lol. ah what can you do? ooh thats good!

hehe i love it too! its exactly like online penpals, that was rlly well put. aww ty! hmm im okay, recovering from a bad case of rsv so thats fun. im doing okay mentally, starting therapy soon (after having to convince my mother that its not just smth i can brush off). physically i wont go into, basically i should be doing stretches to help but they dont completely fix it so my lazy ass doesnt do them, plus i got told recently im going to be stuck with this condition for the rest of my life so thats fun! ah, before you type smth dw abt me ill be fine. the weather atm is cloudy but warm, its been raining on and off today which is good for the garden. uhh i just finished reading sunburnt veils and im in the middle of prom theory which is rlly good. ummm ive got a concert tonight? that i may or may not be able to sing in (bc of the whole rsv thingo) and uhhhh idk. my dog is cute? im drinking tea rn? ive got a school dance coming up?

wbu? hows ur day going, how are you? whats the weather like on ur end? done anything interesting lately? found smth that makes you rlly happy? just any random thing youve been dying to tell someone?

no no! dont apologise, i love these exchanges. i think im happy to continue them for a long time :) on the other hand, if you get tired of them, feel free to just not answer at any time. goodness gracious this was a long ask haha hope it isnt too annoying

<3 w.a. 🐺

sorry it took me a bit to reply, i was fixing my theme ;n;

yeah, i figured it was because of the roles too. my friends and i still get taken aback when 3rd gen idols are the same age as 4th gen ones. in my head it doesn't add up sometimes. PLS THE RANT AT QUORA SKJDK tbh tho it's just going to be normalized as the years pass? esp that the boys are growing older and the amount of explicit fics will just increase. i might have to start blocking tags.

i had to look up the previous ask to remember what we were talking about xd i hope the events in champagne problems never happens to anyone. realistically, it probably happens a lot. damn i really won't wish that pain on anyone. dragging your brother into being a stay i whEEZED JFKSA additional noeasy music enthusiast o.o and ALL I CAN SAY WITH YOU GUSHING ABT FELIX IS AHA WHIPPEEEED OML can't blame you tho, i also want to hear felix sing more in other shades (if that makes sense HAHA) i really hope they'll do the role exchange in the next comeback :( or like in the near future bc i know they can do it :( the day i hear seungmin rapping it i will respectfully pass away. minho was given more lines this comeback thank fUCK i could rmb my irl being vocal abt her frustration. i don't get why minho barely has center time/lines in title tracks??? like the line distribution in the past eras just made me ???? if seventeen can balance lines with 13 members why cant a group of 8 do the same? moving on. i haven't watched the stray kids show simply bc i don't want to cry HAJS but i've seen clips. imagine if skz debuted without minho and felix?!?!? i rmb another irl catching bias feels towards changbin bc of the masked singer only to find out that the man's a rapper. i love how skz's vocals were highlighted this comeback :c there were a lot of mellow tracks! i find it cute when chan sings/raps bc it gets kinda obvious that he's a foreigner? the accent (im not even sure if it's the accent) it just shows. "putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised." CORRECT.

abt the twisted au o.O i'll inquire my irl if she wants to write it or not. if she doesn't want to, i'll do it. i miss writing twisted aus <3___<3 and i also miss going to the beach with my friends :' ) but it's starting to get cold here and i don't think i'll be able to enjoy the beach as much as i would if i went beaching in the summer. so maybe next summer? gone away really has an sm-ballad vibe. the thing about skz being a self-producing group, their songs don't sound like typical jype songs? and i just appreciate that bc in all honesty im not a fan of jyp groups at all. PLS the overthinking. i wish i could mute overthinking.

anyone who assumes kpop is just one genre obv hasn't listened to a single track. if kpop was just one genre why do i like some tracks more than the others??? oh you've only recently become a kpop stan? tbh im not a fan of the bright songs of bts either. i liked their older ones *chefs kiss* really matched high school vibes. yg has good artists and they're just wasting the talent ~.~ that strategy they have will get tiring eventually. people will stop waiting on blackpink and move on to newer more active groups ://

HAHAHAH yeah the 23 members is pretty overwhelming! it was the reason i didn't bother stanning before quarantine started. i don't regret stanning tho, met my ult bias in that group <3___<3 i don't really purchase albums unless i like the tracks xd ohhh getting into ateez just in time for the comeback! let me know what you think about them! i was fond of them at some point but grew out of it. good luck with memorizing enhypen! it took me a while to distinguish to people there XD i haven't checked out kard yet but chan plays their songs during lives and they're sexc hype music me likey *u*

i had to look up rsv im sorry. i'm glad you're recovering! please rest more and don't stress yourself out. bro i wish i could go to therapy too bc i have weird issues i can't justify and i need a professional to tell me what's the reason behind it. stuck with what condition btw? what happened? i'm sorry in case i just forgot. yesterday was a bit rainy for me too :(( it's not the type of rainy that makes me anxious so B) oh concert! good luck and i hope you'll be able to sing but i also don't think it's best for you rn :c what's your dog's breed? and yes i just finished drinking tea too. AAAAA i miss school dances :(( the last one i was supposed to have was cancelled bc of covid.

i was less productive today and i'm teetering between being mentally stable and becoming a hermit again. i'm anxious with a lot of things atm so like : D not the best state. today it was a bit sunny but not hot hot which was nice. i changed my theme today bc i couldn't wait for sept. 1st. and no i haven't found anything that makes me happy HAHAHA shit like that's hard to identify. don't have anything to say too, i'm just thinking about why i'm procrastinating too much atm T_T and i'm listening to this rap song atm and one of the rappers sounded like han.

it isn't annoying! i enjoy the long exchanges but i do admit it takes me awhile to type down a reply. so if i get more busy, it'll prolly take a bit longer for me to reply.

#toff.asks #wild anon 🐺

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ssweeneys · 5 years ago

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i’m having a REALLY bad day

or really past couple of weeks where work is concerned and i just wanna vent bc you know sometimes people out there in the working world understand ya know???

its long, beware. idek if i’ll keep this up its more so for me to just let it out.

so like i’m an office admin for a company (we’ll leave it nameless for protection purposes) and like i supervise receptionists for my office so i’m kinda an office manager but not technically? if that makes sense.

anyway. people these days just don’t want to fucking work like EVER and like to start jobs and then up and vanish to collect that unemployment which to me is really just dumb since there are rules to it in every state and nine times out of ten you’re making like 60% of what your normal paycheck would be and thats surely not enough to live on, so like ??? i don’t get it.

there’s been a constant rotation of receptionists come and go over the last couple of months and two girls who work for me have stepped in on numerous occasions. one lady is in her 60s and doesn’t know anything about computers and is kind of dense?? to say the least. nothing against old ladies. i actually find a majority of them cute or hilarious bc they say what they think and dont give a f*ck who it offends and sometimes that blunt honesty is refreshing and you just need it in a world where people bullshit you 24/7 to further themselves for selfish gain and yaddy yada

anyways.. over recent weeks she’s become more and more intolerable to deal with. i ask her to do things and she gives me attitude and its like the simplest of things.. like email this person, make sure you let this person know they got a package, etc, etc. she can’t do even the most basic of tasks without screwing up. her attitude is just atrocious.

and due to people coming and going i’ve had to alter our schedule a lot. recently, one girl requested off so i adjusted the older lady’s hours (lets call her--carla) mind you carla only works 1 day a week and i’ve been super generous in giving her the entire week of christmas off so -- yeah.

anyways the girl who requested off (we’ll call her nicole) told me she didnt need those days off anymore and so i fixed the schedule one more time to her original days/hours.

now, i print off the schedule every time a change is made and whoever is at the reception desk i tell them to let the other girls know and post it right by the computer they sit at every day so theres no excuse for anyone to say i didnt make them aware. well carla is not the brightest bulb as we already established and she doesnt pay attention so we pretty much have to coddle her apparently and make sure she understands (although its pointless bc she doesnt no matter how hard you try to explain something to her) ANYWAYS she comes in on nicoles day when she wasnt supposed to anymore bc the schedule was fixed, posted, etc. and she gets mad when i ask her why shes there. and yes, i understand that the rotation has fucked us all over and up in so many ways. she is not the only victim here. this has been stressing me out left and right and to no end for MONTHSSSSS. so like i get it? i’m sympathetic to that. i understand the confusion and frustration, i’m right there with them.

HOWEVER, because she’s annoyed/mad/whatever she gives me attitude all day yesterday and is flagrantly disrespectful. i’m her supervisor, regardless is someone upsets you, act professional.

but she doesn’t. we know that. or at least I DO. anyhow.. she’s mad. she’s pissed off right? she’s got an attitude. she sees the new schedule, she brings it to me in my office and asks if its the correct one for tomorrow WHICH SHE IS ON!!! let me make that clear. she was on. she asks if its correct, i’m in the middle of composing an email so i take a moment to respond ‘yes’ she huffs, storms off and goes “you know what? nevermind” i’m like.... okay?? i brush it off. i’ve been brushing off her poor attitude all damn day and i dont say A THING. BC I GET IT. I UNDERSTAND. IM SYMPATHETIC TO THAT. we all have bad days. we all get a little frustrated sometimes. we’re human, yeah?

yeah. right. ok.

so then like... carla is working the morning shift for nicole. both carla and nicole showed up. carla pitched a fit bc she came in and was already there and didnt want to go home so nicole was so sweet about it and said thats okay, she can work i understand. bc even though nicole is like half her age, she’s MATURE.

at this point i dont even understand why carla is so upset? she got to stay. she got the hours. she’ll be making the money. all is good right? WRONG.

when the next girl comes in for the afternoon shift, i over hear carla telling her about the mishap that happened that morning (yesterday) and my office is literally maybe 6-7 feet from the front desk so i can hear EVERYTHING that goes on. i mean this is my job. i’m pretty much in charge of making sure the office is running, our employees are happy, etc.

so yeah i over hear carla telling this girl that and i quote “yeah nicole came in this morning and the schedule was switched around and i stayed because i was already here. (then something unintelligible I cant make out bc her voice lowers) you know, it really pisses me off that this keeps happening.”

SHE SAID THIS. TO A NEW GIRL. MAKING ME, NICOLE, EVERYONE LOOK BAD EVEN THOUGH SHE GOT WHAT SHE WANTED, NICOLE APOLOGIZED, I APOLOGIZED FOR THE MISHAP, IVE DONE EVERYTHING FOR THIS LADY TO PACIFY HER OR WORK WITH HER OR COMPENSATE HER.

so its so infuriating, disrespectful and really downright disgusting for her to trash me, my name, etc to someone. but you know what? I DONT SAY ANYTHING. I dont cause a scene. I go about my business and let it roll off my shoulders bc at this point I know if I say anything its just going to turn ugly and I’m in a professional setting. Sometimes its better to bite your tongue, hold your head up high and move the fuck on about your business.

NOW... oh now, we’re on today. carla is scheduled to work. she came into my office, confirmed it, she was FULLY AWARE OF THIS.

so nicole calls her 5 mins before shes scheduled to clock in and is politely like hey you on your way? and carla is like oh no i don’t work today.

BITCH! THE FUcK YOU MEAN????? WE CONFIRMED THIS LITERALLY!!!!!!!!

omg i cannot at this point i really cannot

but lets proceed... so carla. she’s like yeah i dont come in, tells nicole to check with me. nicole comes to me, i smh and just sigh and am like ok i’m sorry can you please call her back and tell her shes supposed to be here and if theres any issues, transfer the call to me. so nicole calls her, they’re talking, carla is being a cunt (sorry at this point you are) and so i talk to her and shes like you know, this is so frustrating i came in there i asked you if i was supposed to work and you said no (the other girl she trash talked to idk who to name her) and IM LIKE SITTING THERE GOING ????? WHEN????? TO MYSELF BC WE JUST HAD THIS CONVERSATION

MY PATIENCE IS SO THIN, ITS NON EXISTENT AT THIS POINT IM OVER IT

IM TIRED

IM SO FUCKING TIRED AND SICK OF HAVING TO PICK UP THE SLACK AND DO EVERYTHING MY FUCKING SELF BC NO ONE CAN COME TO WORK, DO THEIR JOB AND GO HOME.

can i just make a point too that we make $12 an hour here. sometimes we are LITERALLY SO BORED we have nothing to do. we can read books or watch netflix if no one is around or i even have time to rp at times. so like THIS IS THE EASIEST JOB IN THE WORLD A FUCKING MONKEY could do it.

all you do is answer phones and transfer calls or send an email

its LITERALLY. THAT. FUCKING. SIMPLE????

so like i just dont get it

but back to the point... carla is arguing with me, basically saying my communication sucks, i’m unprofessional (which is laughable but ok) etc...

and i just cant hold it in anymore?? and i’m like well carla, i’m sorry you feel that way and i understand where you’re coming from but i don’t appreciate that you were disrespectful yesterday, you told (new girl) that you were pissed off about what happened and proceeded to talk about me in a really unsatisfactory way.

and she WANTED TO TRY AND SAY THAT THIS WAS A DEFAMATION TO HER CHARACTER. WHEN SHE FUCKING SAID IT!!!!!!!!!!! i mean you can’t but if you were to ask anyone i know i have freakishly good hearing and it gets on my family’s nerves all the time bc i need quiet when writing and i have to beg them to turn their tvs down low just so i can concentrate.

I FUcKIng HEARD THESE EXACT WORDS COME OUT OF HER MOUTH!!!! and she wants to sit here and say that i’m defaming her character.

NO BITCH. Im repeating what I fucking heard you say!!!

why would i make that up? why??? how does that benefit me in any way??? what does that do for me???? NOTHING! ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!! i’m not benefitting from anything here.

in addition when talking to her on the phone i bring up the fact that she brought the schedule to me (the correct one which SHE IS ON) and asked me to verify if it was correct. but then proceeds to say in the same breath (contradicting herself) that she’s going off the old one????? like okay????? but you’re wrong?? SHE EVEN SAYS ITS AN OVERSIGHT ON HER CHARACTER, SHE ALREADY MADE PLANS YADDY YADA, SHE CANT COME IN TODAY

moral of the story is... she’s dumb. she’s a fucking cunt. and i hate people who try to spin things and victim blame and tell you you’re defaming their character when you call them out on something real they actually said because they’re scared little pussies and can’t just admit its what they fucking said.

yo i’d have a lot more respect for you if you just admit it. i’m not even mad??? i dont give a fuck what you think or feel about me. when i leave here every day i dont come home and cry about work or how people feel about me there.

work me is different from real me. I. DO. NOT. FUCKING. CARE. work people do not know me on a real level only a professional one. i am here to do a job, to make money, to pay bills, to LIVE. i am not here to fret over the opinions of people who do not follow me home, who do not know the real me. WHO. DO. NOT. FUCKING. MATTER.

POINT FUCKING BLANK.

THANK YOU AND GOODBYE

like seriously?? GOD FUCK! i’m so angry.

if you read all of this, like thanks for letting me vent to a total stranger lmao you’re a real one, may you be blessed today and always.

onto that note... i gotta get back to work. (lmfao fucking irony at its finest)

#im not even gonna read over this #its raw #its real #what the fuck ever

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zepdeans · 6 years ago

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there’s not a lot I can say about s3 that hasn’t already been said (and articulated 200x better) but! here are some of my (albeit dumb) thoughts :~)

ep1 -isak leaning against the bathroom wall gets me EVERY time its such a powerful scene esp introducing you to s3 and tarjei..... spare some talent for the rest of us please -LiTeN gUtTeN fRa StRaNgEr tHiNgS -isak rly ties his pants w a shoelace...... -isak noticing even for the first time bc of his laugh.. whew.... also. i love this intro SOOO much bc its so non-monumental? theres no dramatic music or whatever but its not subtle.... like you know right away o shit love interest!! hello sir!! bc isak’s expression watching him :’) i could go on -isak is a bad liar HOWEVER this only applies to stupid nontrivial things e.g. the black sweatshirt. but when you look at him lying about like, his sexuality, he hides that shit well -”c00l” isak. i hate u so much -honestly all u have to do is look at even for .2 seconds and u can tell this boy has had a crush for a solid month bc he just looks awestruck (HOWEVER henrik’s acting is *chef’s kiss* bc its subtle enough to go undetected b4 you actually know eVEN SAW HIM ON THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL) -even isak and emma all sitting on the bench together is funny enough on its on but then a song called threeway comes on and like. julie sdshjsfdjfkjskd ep2 -there’s something so endearing about even’s handwriting idek what -i LOVE even’s video w mikael it reveals so much about him to us- how weird (ok we saw how weird he was w the paper towel thing but) and dorky he is? and his love of film! his view on love stories and how he sees the world :( but it also shows a lot abt isak because he saw even making stupid jokes about vladimir putin and was like yeah we about to fall in LOVE love -isak not using headphones to watch even’s video or r+j?? bde or general incompetence what’s the verdict guys -the isak watching r+j scene hits so hard like yall ever think about isak lying in bed at 3am staring at the ceiling probably thinking about how he’s never gonna get a beautiful world-shattering romance like that like ..... also him changing positions skam get out of my life go away ur too realistic -not to make this even more self-projection-y but isak simultaneously being the least emotionally vulnerable person ever but crying during r+j > -i made a post abt this already but even’s INTENSE staring vs isak’s “i have never looked anyone in the eye in my life” gets me it says so much about their characters -even said i see your bde move (asking me to buy you beer) and i raise u with my own (inviting you to my house after faking not having my id) -”if you listen to music” even is such a dick fsdjhsdff -when the message comes on...... i rlly do owe julie my life huh -”have you heard about my rapping?” “I have actually” have we talked about this enough????? 1. isak finally feels comfortable enough w even to flirt and his first move is to RAP for him jesus christ. keep in mind this is the same man who pulled that smooth af ibuprofen line w emma like...... 2. even has heard about isak’s rapping. either this means im-not-on-social-media even went out of his way to go thru homeboy’s instagram OR isak’s rapping is actually talked about. i- -the group chat messages. cant believe i forgot about the 2016 clown epidemic

ep3 -mahdi is a good friend and i love him. thank u -even wearing isak’s cap until he chucks it at him sjksfjsdjsd -how much yall wanna bet isak’s been listening to illmatic on repeat since last friday thinking abt even (even tho meeting sonja shattered his heart a lil) [also kinda an aside but i think a lot about how isak n even bonded over rap and how some homophobic lyrics in 90s etc rap might have impacted them? or how that little detail ties into julie’s story? e.g. halftime by nas, which is on illmatic] -whats worse. even staring into isaks soul wearing a size xs see-through white t shirt or isak staring at even for five (5) seconds before chugging his beer and immediately making out w emma. OR even crashing that party before it can start “i think you guys are bonding too much” cheesy ass shjhfsdhskdf -yall act like evak didnt invent hands. did even shaking isak’s shoulder telling him his apartment is nice mean nothing to u -im convinced robyn wrote call your girlfriend for this scene specifically bc how could anything fit so perfectly by coincidence -is anything better than egging isak on- even bech naesheim (2016) -idk if yall have read the scripts but i love the sock thing so much bc its soo true to how isak thinks and it makes everything so much more interesting and !!!

ep4 -i will never get over even sending isak bad seinfeld memes -even smacking open isak’s locker. first of all whew second of all u think as soon as he got into the stairwell he lowkey cried bc ow -parallel of isak saying “it’s 2016, why are you religious?” to sana vs. emma’s “it’s 2016, get out of the closet” to isak anyone :( -”takk sanasol!!!!” thank u isak for my life -I wanted to be with you aloneeeee -even’s face when he sees the pool like we get it youre a director -how many times do i need to say even is such a dick sjkfsd “does it look like i care about my hair?” “usually but not right now” like this would only work on isak i love soulmates!! -even just.. fully choking isak out ssdhgfd got em -when the first notes of im kissing you start ooh boy -even going in for the kill kiss and isak going from huh to oooo shit and pushing his lips out at the last minute. phenomenal

ep5 -ngl as soon as im not in love comes on my heart goes uwu bc like!!!! that song the meaNING.... them......... i jus love this scene sm like theyre in their own little bubble and they both feel so comfortable and at peace :(( -even leaving isak comics about an inside joke of theirs like yall mind if i scream -isak feeling left out from the conversation and his friends whew i felt that... and having them talk about how gross it is to makeout with a girl w facial hair?? blease :( -taking stock of isak’s nicknames: issy k, isabell, izzy, baby jesus, -im not even gonna bother trying to articulate thoughts on Pause bc it’s a literal masterpiece. thank u tarjei henrik and julie for inventing television with this one -MAGNUS SDFKJSDFJKDSHK "oooh my name is Jonas and I love idealism and reading klassekampen and I don’t like plastic and I skate on a skateboard made of sustainable wood and wear old clothes because new clothes are bad for the environment and I only drink recycled water” screAMMM -what i said abt pause also applies to pride ugh its such a powerful scene and!! the beginning of kicks to isaks stomach. honestly what i fucking love about this episode is how it goes from hell yea best day w even ever to crying in the street within one week (s3 had the best balance of angst and payoff thanks) -even’s Soft Party Flannel... forever tainted by this scene rip -not knowing why even kissed sonja keeps me up at night -speaking of. how used and stupid isak must’ve felt when he saw even completely unbothered, hooking up w his ex at this party?? whew :( -bros is one of my all time favourite clips solely bc of the music?? lift me up gives me chills and when hold my liquor starts i LOSE it -ep5 and 6 remind me of that quote “to see what your characters are really made of you have to break them” because julie rlly goes all in and god it hurts so good

ep6 -never have i ever seen insomnia portrayed as accurately as tarjei did here and i remember when i first watched the cantina scene i was like. winded bc its SO true to sleep deprivation whew -i really like that isak wasnt together with even when he reached out for help and came out to jonas. bc it was him, on his own, being strong enough to talk to his friends and then eventually he was confident and secure enough in himself to be in a good place when even started reaching back out!! -i have no idea what its like to come out to someone, to be afraid of your friends rejecting you, everything isak went through. but tarjei’s acting of when, like, you have something you KNOW you have to tell someone, and youve put yourself in the position where youre going to have to tell them, but youre terrified and eventually just force yourself SAY the words?? -and isak’s smile when he realizes jonas is gonna be his bro no matter what :’)))

ep7 -weirdly one of my favourite isak looks (black t-shirt grey snapback c-c-c-combo) -”what’s your name again?” have i mentioned i love sana and isak bc i love sana and isak -jonas truly is the best friend oh man. perceptive, thoughtful, loving, laidback, a friggen BRO. tbh i was wary of him in s1 and thought he didn’t treat eva well (tho I recognized he loved her a lot, he was just bad at being a boyfriend) but jonas in s3?? just goes to show how powerful your perspective of someone can change viewing them in a different role!! because while jonas was a crappy bf, he literally is SUCH an incredible friend and his actions and words and just! him! in s3 completely redeemed any illwill I had towards him :’) -maybe im a little gay (up there with other s3 comedy classics such as “thats a boys name”) -mahdi season WHEN ugh a legend -’when someone asks isak if hes going to a family party’ literally what other reason for living do i have if not to read the boy squad text convos -isaks locker finally opening and his smile at evens drawing whewwwwwww!! also even rlly is that guy who wont text you back but will leave hand written love letters in ur locker -also. another stellar look from valtersen -slutt a meld meg is a whole masterpiece like what other piece of media has the RANGE -eskild: play hard to get. jonas: no smiley!!! isak: nah fam im good B)

ep8 -this episode is BEAUTIFUL bc you feel practically euphoric?? like hell yeah theyre finally together!! isak is out and accepted and even is done with sonja! but theres also this unsettling undercurrent of worry bc you know deep down something isnt right? why is sonja calling isak? why is even acting kinda strange? whats going on? yknow?? -literally never going to get over 5 fine frokner :~) even is such a goddamn nerd and he’s the man of isak’s dreams can u believe!! -sana’s little speech is SO important in so many ways ooo i love her so much -also have we discussed eskild making evak do a photoshoot for him. highkey those are my favourite pictures of ALL time u can tell even was like hm strange but im down while isak was more omg guys stop🙄 omg haha eskild i cant believe youre making me cuddle with even for a photo🙄 i cant believe ur making me snuggle this dude for a pic!!!! definitely would not have done this otherwise!!! -magnus only realizing it’s THAT even after seeing how isak looks at him. whew -isak is so brave i rlly love that kid! his text to his mamma <3 -no r*make will EVER nail text conversations like mari/julie did w evak’s this week thanks for coming to my ted talk. i'd quote the best ones but it would literally double the length of this post (ok ill cave. “hahaha shut up❤️” GETS me) -you dont know whats in store but you know what youre here for. hallo -isak running around oslo with even’s clothes looking for him :( his heart is so big he cares about even so so much -when Part II (on the run) comes on in the credits its like a kick in the teeth honestly

ep9 -ive already screamed enough about cherry wine but god it fucks me up -cannot put into words how much I love eskild and how good of a person he is, he just has so much love in his heart -”wait they have waffles here? see ya” -this convo is why i love skam so much!!!! magnus giving insight and good thoughtful advice to isak was such a brilliant move by julie (also truLy heartwarming) bc like. magnus is a flawed layered character! he’s dumb and ignorant and not very careful with his words BUT hes also such a sweet guy. i genuinely dont think he would hurt a fly and him talking about vilde (in ep10) is ;-; bc he really likes her and respects her and wants to be a gentleman! hes so loving and just. yeah. also i wonder if isak and magnus (and vilde) ever talked about having mentally ill parents and lent on each other for support bc like....<3 [sidenote- this is why i HATE b***** like they absolutely massacred magnus’s character and magnus did not deserve that!] -det er bare slutt........ very cool of tarjei to invent acting here. also the character development makes me WEEP like at first isak lied and told his pappa it was over bc its easier to brush stuff off and say you were joking than be vulnerable especially about 1. having a boyfriend and 2. saying youve already broken up?? but then isak was like hey im done with lying about who i am bc i want my life to be REAL and he told his dad the truth even if it was hard and even if he was trying rlly hard not to cry -isak reaching out to even<3 standing up for even<3 -o helga natt. another scene i genuinely cannot comment on bc u cant really put into any written language how magical and breathtaking and heartbreaking and powerful and brilliant this scene is. so. -jk. obvs i cant say anything intelligent enough to give this scene justice but probably the most stunning piece of television i have ever had the privilege of watching. even’s text breaks my heart every gd time (esp since we never really see this side of him before finding out he’s bipolar? his guilt, insecurity, feeling like a burden, being scared of losing everyone in his life because he thinks he’ll hurt them). the music is SO beautiful i cry real tears as soon as the strings start. also the brilliance of JUST o helga natt playing and no dialogue except for isaks one line? isak’s realization when he sees the cross. him RUNNING across oslo to go to even. the FLASHBACKS all going backwards in chronological order until them smoking on the bench. isak looking at the bench and not seeing even and u can feel his heart breaking and urs breaks too! but then he remembers the bathroom and he turns and theres even and whewwww. du er ikke alene<3

ep10 -minutt for minutt is THE most healing clip im telling u. and like.. seeing even depressed really is hard and as someone who was very very depressed for 4-ish yrs of their life it rlly hits me? like when youre in an especially bad funk and you cant get out of bed and youre just numb and exhausted and feel so shitty and u want to be alone but you really dont???? could go on but literally i owe henrik holm my life for his portrayal of even -not to be a soft bitch on main but when isak tucks the blanket over even and it keeps getting pulled off his back so isak just. covers that spot with himself? -i do love that call between sonja and isak bc once again! a flawed (realistic) human being -and isak thinking its his fault even is depressed? it means a lot that sonja told him its no ones fault, even is just bipolar. and i wonder if isak felt that way about his mamma as well, guilty for her being ill, and if what sonja said made him feel better about that situation too :( -lowkey random but when isak is rambling really fast and he goes “maybe we’ll get bombed tomorrow and talking about all this is a waste of time” it continually punches me in the throat bc that is /exactly/ how i ramble and think like tarjei........ pls -like eskild said. there really is so much love in isak’s little grumpy teenage body<3 -isak no longer just passively accepting life as its given to him, now he fights for him and even!!!!! -isak is such a forgiving person and seeing him able to just accept things and move on? incredible -i remember when i first watched ep1 i was like oooo even and isak are gonna be kosegruppa partners and thats when theyll first get together, cooking food or smth!! but lmfao after episode 3? kosegruppa whomst???? also hilarious vilde thought isak of all people would willingly sign up for kosegruppa just to go to revue parties -even and linn friendship!!!! -cannot articulate how mf heartwarming it is to see even smiling and being more himself after being depressed (also thank u julie for having ups and downs coming out of his depression- its so true to life having one day when youre feeling awesome and then the next you feel awful again for no reason and its SO frustrating) -I had to stop watching passe pa meg cause it made me toooooo crazy! it would just be like: “I like seeing you laugh” and I was like: *SCREAMS* -im the fucking master of lying 😤 -literally don’t know why isak and even ragging on kosegruppa is so funny but “did you think I joined to have fun” gets me every time -I SAW YOU THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL -also even literally radiating love @ isak watching get snarky w vilde on the phone bc it reminded him of the first time he saw him! even rly is that boyfriend who thinks isak being pissy is the Best Thing he has Ever seen -halla boiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiz -literally the glo up of isak telling his friends the order in which he’d bang them -No filter! wow I love symbolism -so nice to see the girls together for a lil bit :) -the boys hyping up mags while also telling him to be respectful awwwwww -take desperate to a whole new level- Confucius -who’s going to show isak how to properly hold a beer can -literally evak banter gets me thru the day. thank u tarjei and henrik for having phenomenal chemistry + improvisation skills + making isak and even the dumbest nerdiest boys i have ever seen -biology partner. and friend. ;-; -even literally is the biggest stoner blease -isak’s talk with eva is just sooooo<3 and not to be emo on main but every single word of the last few sentences he says hit me so gd hard because i feel the exact same way in my BONES -livet er nå 💛

final thoughts :( <3 -this season is so special. it feels like one really long oscar-worthy movie or smth?? i cant even exblain, its just magical. ALSO very dear to my heart. -julie really said you guys have seen isak sad and alone and repressed for the past two seasons so heres him falling in love with the best person in the world and coming to terms with who he is and being brave and opening up and finally being happy and living a real life -this season definitely feels different from s1/2/4 to me editing or production or music smth wise? as in, its got a lot fewer aesthetic shots and the cinematography seems a bit different if that makes any sense???? I also think this is the season most focused just on the main (i.e. not many- if any? sideplots going on) -literally will never get over the thought, love, and detail put into this season. when i say there is literally nothing i would change about it, i mean it and coming from my nitpicky ass??? means a lot lmfao. the acting, directing, music choices, symbolism...... sublime -s3′s cold rainy autumn aesthetic makes me ACHE for fall and also nostalgic for a highschool experience I never had lmao?? also. all the nighttime clips >>> -don’t know what else to say except thank u skam for my life

#take a shot every time i say whew #fully put more effort and time into this than most of my uni projects xx #its super rambly but thats bc its mostly just my direct stream of thought #also super long! and probably still missing things i wanted to say #AND like 3 weeks late fshfjjkdjkfsd #skam #clownfest 2019 #blabbey

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the-angry-pixie · 6 years ago

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How about Halloween Again, the bit from "“Wait! So you knew?! Why did Lucas get to know and not me?! " to the "Fuck what anyone else thinks" part (is that 500 words?? approximately?? idek)

(For the DVD commentary ask meme - still taking requests btw)

This passage is taken from Halloween (again) - and so obviously, spoilers for that story if you haven’t read it.

You’re lucky I like you Anon cause that was way over 500 words. :P

“Wait! So you knew?! Why did Lucas get to know and not me?! I mean, I get Dustin because he can’t keep a secret to save his life but what about me!” Mike demanded.

He saw Will approaching him in his periphery. “Because…” he felt hands cupping around his cheeks and he grudgingly met the shorter boys eyes. “… you would have freaked out. You would have overthought it and eventually chickened out. You know I’m right” Will was speaking so gently, it soothed Mike’s frayed nerves and he felt his heartbeat calm down a notch.

This is a very real concern when it comes to Mike. He’s still dealing with a lot of fear and worry when it comes to his and Will’s relationship. Without a doubt if he’d known ahead of time that they were dressing up as The Village People - he would have fretted and angsted and eventually CONVINCED himself that they couldnt possibly go as that because then everybody would just KNOW about them. Will could have pointed out that him dressing up as a “gay icon” had actually been very popular with the ladies last year but it wouldn’t have mattered. He could have told Mike over and over again that the idea was FUNNY and that nobody would look into it any further than that. But it wouldnt have mattered. Mike’s just a tad too neurotic for that. So I think Will made a good choice in not telling Mike and just not allowing him the chance to think or stew on it.

“Maybe.” he grumped, to the apparent amusement of the young man standing in front of him. Will smiled at him and pecked him on the lips briefly before sliding under his arm. Mike felt himself calm even further as he squeezed him to his side, enjoying his familiar warmth.

Little moments of gentle affection. Me loves writing them. Its everything that we wanted but didn’t get in Starman.

They looked over to where Dustin was still looking as sulky as Mike felt.

He was sitting on the couch now, grumbling to his knees. “I’m not that bad at keeping secrets…”

“C’mon buddy. Even I was need-to-know basis. The girls—”

“Hey!”

“—ugh fine! The girls and Will weren’t able to get any Army Man clothes. They needed to know if I could dress in my Dad’s old uniform.” Lucas was still trying to comfort his friend. Hand clutched around his upper-arm and squeezing.

And thats a little moment showing *Will’s* insecurities that are still lurking. Now that he’s out and proud (at least to his friends) he’s certainly not going to allow himself to be thought of as “one of the girls”. Doesn’t matter that thats totally not what Lucas meant - its still a little thing that Will is (overly)sensitive to.

“Yeeeaaah. C’mon pre-party buddy!” Max said kneeling down in front of the teen and leaning on his knees. “Dry your eyes, untwist your panties and come do some shots with me.”

“Yeah and when you’re done, report to my room. We have a lot of body glitter to apply before we’ll be ready to go!” El clapped her hands happily before grabbing Lucas’ arm and pulling him towards her bedroom.

I absolutely adore the idea of El being really into makeup and therefore the most enthusiactic about its application on everybody.

Max was doing the same to Dustin, only towards the kitchen and the bottle of peppermint schnapps she’d stored in the freezer earlier. Although Dustin was dragging his feet, he seemed at least a little more enthused about the idea of alcohol.

Meanwhile Mike turned himself so he was now facing Will. His arms easily settling around his waist. Like a lock clicking into place.

“Body glitter huh?” he murmured. Trying to cover his nerves with humour.

“Mmhmm” Will smiled that little close-mouthed smile of his. “We have to highlight…” his nimble fingers were pinching at Mike’s flannel shirt, pulling buttons from their holes, “all your…” the material slowly parted until the buttons all the way down to his belt-buckle were undone “…assets.” Will smirked, running his hands across Mike’s chest. Eyes catching his as they sparkled impishly.

Will isn’t being horny here. The Village People really *did* never do up their shirt buttons. Ok… maybe he’s being a *little* horny. He also might be laying it on a little thick just to tease Mike a bit. He’s an imp. I like writing him with an impish attitude.

“Yeah but are you sure about this?” Mike’s hands came up to clutch around Will’s, halting their ministrations. His eyes burned seriously. As much as he tried he could not bring himself to just join in on Will’s teasing. “Isn’t it a little… obvious?”

The teen in front of him huffed, meeting his gaze. “A little obviously what Michael? A little obviously gay?”

Mike scrunched up his nose. “Well… yeah… I guess so.”

Will was giving him that look. That look he always gave him when he wanted to laugh at Mike but was holding himself back.

“Seriously Mike. Don’t��worry so much. Nobody is going to care. If anything, they will find it funny! I mean, it IS funny! Especially after we finish applying all the fake moustaches! El is going to look hilarious!”

EVERYBODY IS GOING TO BE WEARING FAKE MOUSTACHES OR FACIAL HAIR (EXCEPT MAX) AND I AM *LIVING*. Have I mentioned recently how obsessed I am with getting the Party dressed up as The Village People?? It’s practically the only reason I wrote this oneshot. Fun Fact: I got the idea from another show called The Almighty Johnsons. Where four brothers get pranked and all turn up separately to a costume party and realise that “Aw fuck. Together, we’re The Village People”.

“I don’t want to look hilarious…” Mike bemoaned quietly, imagining all the people staring. Whispering. Wondering. “I don’t want people looking at me at all!”

“Yes you do!” Will snipped, his tone almost sounding scolding. “This could be our last Halloween altogether for a long, long time. We’ll all be at college next year. We need to make tonight special. We need to do this together. As a group! Fuck what anyone else thinks!”

His voice was sounding earnest now and his fingers were curling around Mike’s chin authoritatively, giving him nowhere to look but into his sea green eyes.

“Say it with me now Wheeler! Fuck what anyone else thinks!”

He was staring silently at Mike. He obviously required an answer.

“Fuck what anyone else thinks.” Mike muttered halfheartedly.

“Fuck what anyone else thinks!!” Will demanded again, his fingers clenching around Mike’s jaw. And he just looked so cute, his face all determined and stubborn.

“FUCK what anyone else thinks!” Mike announced with more gusto, chuckling as he enjoyed the smile that broke across Will’s face like a sunrise.

“I STILL CAN’T HEAR YOU WHEELER! CALL YOURSELF A COWBOY?!“ Will was absolutely bellowing now. His other hand coming up so he could shake Mike’s head from side to side enthusiastically. “ONE MORE TIME FOR THE PEOPLE DOWN THE STREET!! FUCK WHAT ANYONE ELSE THINKS!!!”

“FUCK WHAT ANYONE ELSE THINKS!!!” they both crowed in unison breaking down into giggles as they heard the cheers coming from the kitchen and El’s bedroom and the token protests about “language” coming from Mrs Byers’ room.

I guess Will decided that what Mike *really* needed at that moment was a Battle Cry. I tried to lay the ground in Starman that Will had been holding this “fuck what anyone thinks” attitude for awhile. He didn’t get it from Theo. He already had it. Theo only bolstered it. And now its Will’s turn. His turn to be the cheerleader. To show Mike that it doesn’t matter. It *really* doesn’t matter. All that matters is them and The Party and having a FUCKING GOOD TIME for their last Halloween together. Its really important to Will. And I loved writing Mike just kind of, getting sucked in by Will’s enthusiasm. Because a confident Will - its a beautiful sight!

“Sorry Mom!” Will responded through his giggles as he fell against Mike trying to muffle his laughter into his chest. Mike held him close, sniggering into his hair.

And yes. I loved writing Joyce’s little cameo. She doesn’t really care, not enough to come out and give them a lecture. Its more just like the token “Mom comment”. Also I like to think that Joyce takes joy in how proud and strong Will is - about his sexuality, his relationship with Mike, everything. So just imagine her giggling away in her room as she shuffles through a magazine, hearing her children whoop and cheer from all corners of her house.

Thanks so much for the prompt Anon! I love doing these. Hopefully they are somewhat interesting. :)

#Anonymous #pixie writes #byeler #there's a Starman waiting in the sky #meme things

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thestuckylibrary · 7 years ago

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Group Ask 73

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Anon 1 said:

hey, been searching for one fic for hours and can't find it. bucky's foreskin grows back after azzano and steve "teaches" him how to make it feel good. thanks! youre doing amazing work

claudia-flies sent in In the Heartlands by Claudia_flies (oneshot | 4,142 | E)

Anon 2 said:

Hi! I’m wondering if you guys can help me find a fic? I know it was shrinkyclinks where Bucky was on the Avengers and I think it was modern small Steve. Bucky never hung out with the Avengers and didn’t trust them because he thought they were working with Fury and would hurt him if he ever let his guard down around them? And he gets hurt on a mission but doesn’t want anyone to help him and then Steve shows up? Sorry it’s vague but I can’t find this anywhere and I’d love some help! Thank you!!

the-littlesparrow sent in but you only get half of the story by Hazloveshisboo (oneshot | 2,008 | G)

the-littlesparrow, farkenshnoffingottom, ealdor, and Anon sent in A Matter of Pride(?) by Quarra (oneshot | 5,918 | M)

Anon 3 said:

hi, I'm looking for this one fic where Steve thinks Bucky is better off without Steve, and so Steve casts himself away from the latter. Also, there's this little bit about how Steve sees that Buck and Nat are super close, so he perceives that as them being in a relationship. Also I think there are old rings involved?? Thanks!

Anon sent in I Do, I Don't, I Die by prisma134 (oneshot | 12,179 | E)

Anon 4 said:

hello! I'm looking for a fic and all I can remember is a part where bucky gets angry at steve and goes to visit Peggy and ends up getting framed for a bunch of murders? sorry if thats vague, it's literally all I can remember from it. thank you!!

Anon 5 said:

I have searched the tags and everywhere else, but I still can’t find this fic about Bucky choosing to only speak Russian around Steve. Eventually, Steve proposed in perfect Russian and everyone was shocked and then they went on this huge search to figure out when he learned Russian. Please help!

Anon sent in This is how it starts by rinnya (complete | 35,191 | T)

Anon 6 said:

I'm looking for a fic that was written a few years ago. It's a steve and/or bucky clone/kid fic. I think it was inspired by a picture of Steve in the top frame sleeping with his/bucks kid, and bucky walking with his/steve's kid. There was something about them finding a warehouse with Bucky there, and Bucky kissing the forehead of the kid before giving him to steve. That or he walks away with him,and steve also has a kid. Kid is baby or toddler age only. 2ish kids max found

Anon 7 said:

Do you happen to know the title of the fic where Steve, Tony and (I think it's Rhodey? Or Sam) are best friends in college, and Bucky is Steve's dormmate and Steve wants to be with him but doesn't know if Bucky is gay or not and so Tony helps him find out? I can't find it for the life of me

lilgreyeyes sent in should you choose to accept by layersofsilence (oneshot | 5,068 | T)

Anon 8 said: major character death

i've been looking everywhere but i just can't seem to find this fic: steve & bucky are soulmates/bonded + there was modern!bucky. it had an epilogue with their adult daughter talking with dying/old steve about his life with bucky, who had died a few months before. i think there was a quote along the lines of ''He [Steve] lasted for three months without him...'' steve died of heartbreak and he was reunited with bucky in the afterlife. this has been bugging me for weeks 😩👌🏼

Anon suggests My Love Letters To You* by Mrgoodbar (restricted, oneshot | 2,518 | G) *MCD

katzengirl sent in 1917 by msbluesunflower (series | 14,263 | M)

Anon 9 said:

Can you help me find a fic? I think it was a recovering bucky fic, bucky had been reprogrammed by shield and had a killswitch that was wrapped around his spine. I rdmember the russians coming after him when he was on a date in a park with steve and he fled snd went on the run again, but i cant find it!

Anon 10 said:

There was something I read a while ago, so Idek if it's still up, but if it is, could you direct me to it? It's where Bucky gets triggered by the cold but not because of Hydra freezing him and stuff, but because the Winter/Cold is when Steve would get sick the most and it scared him to death, and so during the cold time's he'd become clingy to Steve. I can't find it anywhere but if you know where it is that'd be amazing, thanks!

#group asks

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mairzymarzipan · 6 years ago

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Night of the Full Moon Character Reviews: The Big Bosses(Minus Werewolf)

Hello again

I know I said I’d be talking about the Hunter, Old Mage, Fallen Priest and so on today, but I realized that those characters were actually more interesting in the context of other characters, so I put them off for later. I decided instead to talk about the main bosses of the game, as it so happens, are the closest people to Red Riding Hood. Because this game wants to be an ironicy soap opera/anime that way.

When I say Big Bosses, I mean that you always fight one of these characters at the end of the game. Unless you’re like me and you start all over at the end because you’re bored and tired of all four of them playwise.

Werewolf

Wait, no, never mind. This is another one of those characters who’s more interesting in the context of different, non-Red Riding Hood Characters. We’re saving this boi for later. But, you shouldn’t too surprised, if you read the title. Instead, I’ll just use this space to talk about a mechanic.

Throughout the game, you can get ‘courage’ and ‘reputation’ points by talking to characters. Very very generally speaking, you get courage points by doing brave things, and you get reputation points for doing nice things. You also can get courage points when a character talks shit about the werewolf, and reputation points when a character talks shit about the witch. So naturally, if you have more courage in the end, you get to fight the wolf, and if you have more reputation, you get to fight the witch. I guess what they’re going for is only a meanie would fight this doggo? And the witch is who any empathetic person would hate???

I feel like the latter is not the case, but more on that later.

Witch

“Only your Hope family can lift the dark magic curse. This is what the priest is most afraid of. That’s why monsters run wild on full moon nights. First they made your grandmother disappear and then they drew you into the forest...but they never anticipated that you would make it this far.”

By the way, you’re part of a prophecy. Only someone in your family can lift the curse on the forest. jsyk

Yeah so, as you see, the Witch’s description does not really tell us much about the witch herself. This description also pretty unique in that none of the other character descriptions go into the second person like this. The description also kind of hints that Red dies in the timeline where she fights the witch, so that’s depressing.

Nah, to figure out what the witch is about, you have to delve into the fragments around her.

So, you actually do encounter the witch earlier in the game. In the third or sometimes second chapter, she will recruit to find some magic apples she lost. She makes a mention about suspecting a queen of stealing them. The apples, I guess, are just lying around on the forest floor, and you bite into each of them bc you’re a dumb lkid. Each apple changes your stats by a few points and the witch does not at all seem upset that you hand her a bunch of bitten fruit at the end. In fact, she offers you the choice of two random buffs, so that’s fun.

You’re likely to hear about her way before that, though, depending on who you talk to. Generally anyone who’s been cursed feels like it’s the witch’s fault.

But if you choose to fight her(or you might not get a choice in the matter) she accuses you of stealing said apples. She’ll also talk to you throughout the battle until you defeat her- a trait that only the big bosses and a few of the newer ones have. Her lines...make her sound pretty unhinged. She’s speaks of disbelief that you would do such a horrible thing, and threatens you with with her magic, and talks about how misunderstood she is.

When you defeat her, she’s got a really interesting line, tho.

“No! I don’t want to fight you! I can’t!”

Huh.

Before I move on, let me talk about this other witch character.

Yep. That sure is the art style this game is going with.

So this is one of the shopkeepers. There are four different shops you can find along the way, only two of which have characters you can see in them. This character is known as the Witch Apothecary...but you can only see that on the outside of her store. Otherwise she’s just called “Witch”.

The thing is, along the way, characters will talk about the Witch and, they don’t specify that it’s not the one with the white hair. They just talk about The Witch like she’s the only witch that matters. So is this woman not really a witch? A witch wannabe? Nah, we already have one of those characters. Could it me that the shopkeepers don’t actually exist in the story of the game? That would bum me out, bc there’s this lesbian owl I want to be real.

But...I think they’re the same person using shapeshifting. Or if you want a really wild theory, maybe there are time travel hijinks and she’s the Magic Apprentice grown up. But I’m going to go ahead with the former.

Anyhoo. I like the witch. I’m gonna give her 🍎🍎🍎🍎 four apples

Priest

“They mistakenly thought that on the full moon night they could help the monsters quietly eliminate Little Red Riding Hood and her grandmother. Once the Hope family was wiped out, the legend of lifting the curse on the Dark Forest would disappear completely. However, they didn’t expect they would have to go personally and pay such a high price to fight their enemy. When the priest fell, the cursed monsters reverted to their human forms and the Dark Forest was no longer covered by snow all year round, but the church’s blind greed still remains.”

Again, not much is said about the priest himself. The most interesting thing here is that he apparently is the keystone holding the curse together. Interesting, because he seems to be letting the witch do all the work for him. Usually in these stories, you have to kill the person who casts the spell to break the spell, not just their friend. Is it because he, himself, is a stone? That is to say, he turns into a statue sometimes.

Why the heck is he having her turn all his enemies into cartoon monsters instead of killing them, anyway? Don’t tell it’s to make the game family friendly, bc in one of these timelines a child kills another child.

Honestly, the priest/church just doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. His big plan is selling everybody from his town as slaves. Gross. And the way he accomplishes this is by...making it snow all the time, and turning people into vampires and fire bears? What?

He is. A delight to fight. I’m being sarcastic. He’s a religious edgelord who likes to go on about how humans are sinners and everyone deserves to be punished. Also she cheats by turning into stone. Eh.

It feels like someone just spun a wheel for of evil traits and just stuck them together haphazardly. His evil plan is...human trafficking! His personality is...self righteous! His means is...tf! His super power is...turning into a statue!

He’s the biggest of bads but also not that thought out. He’s super important to the over-arching plot and yet I have no idea why this guy does what he does. I’m gonna give him 🗽🗽 two statues.

Mystery Men

idek why this person is called “Mystery Men”. I’m guessing it’s supposed to be mystery man? Or mysterious person or something? I know I haven’t talked about the art much but, I do appreciate how much their face looks like a dog snout and her hood looks like dog ears. It’s a neat touch.

This description was actually changed. The new text is longer and more awkwardly worded. I don’t like it! And I don’t get why it happened.

But, yeah. The very last enemy of the game- who you can only reach by playing through at least four times and defeating all three others- is your Grandmother! Le gasp!

So what exactly went wrong with her? Oh, nothing, she just has a big wolf growing out of her back(told you the concept was backed up by canon)

Is this her daemon or patronus or something? I have no idea. I’ve been calling her a werewolf sometimes, tho, bc she’s better at being a werewolf than the titular werewolf. Which is to say she can revive instead of just healing. Her buffs and deck change throughout the fight. She’s a long battle, fun, except for her ear piercing voice. She sounds a bit possessed.

I’ll give her 👁️👁️👁️ three big eyes. She’s a fun battle, but I always mute it. Also not real big on how the text got changed for the worse. But she does add some good details to the story.

In Conclusion...

Grandma’s text tells us a few things.

1. Not only is the Hope family connected to this prophecy, but family members actually have the power to control the curse. That leads me to believe that the person who got the curse started was a Hope themself.

2. The church came along long after the curse was in full swing. So the priest is not responsible for it. Whether he’s a Hope himself is not relevant.

We also know these things:

1. The witch is still the one casting all the tf spells, which is part of the curse.

2. There are two timelines were Red has a natural gift for magic

3. In the Little Witch timeline, the Witch is teaching Red magic. On top of that she’s v patient, which is surprising, for some reason.

4. The Witch seems a little out of touch with reality. She sends you to find apples, and then yells at you for stealing them. Almost like she thinks you’re another person.

5. The witch verbally expresses her desire not to fight you when she realizes who you are.

I have to conclude that the Witch is a Hope. A Hope who’s close enough to have a fondness for Little Red Riding Hood, and is invested in her well being/education. And yanno, is turns her enemies into pig people because she can.

She helps you on your quest by giving you one of her own. But earlier on, she takes on the form of the other witch offer you potions and the like. She even gives you the first one in each chapter for free.

“My potions can change your appearance!”

Of course she can’t get too close to you. She can’t reveal that she’s helping you. Hence putting on a new face when she’s a ‘good’ witch. One wonders if she’s trying to hide her identity from you, or the people she’s allied with.

Hey can we look at her description again?

Red doesn’t get addressed in the second person in any of the other descriptions. There is a character who talks about his life in the first person, and we’ll get to him. But this is odd to me.

What if Red isn’t being addressed here? What if it’s someone else? What if it’s the Witch?

What if the Witch was captured and ensnared in the priest’s plot? What if he messed with her memory? So then who is she? Red’s sister? It seems like she’s been working with the church a lot longer than Grandma’s been missing. Also Grandma went into the woods on her own accord. You could say that the grief the church caused her *made* her go out, but it seems weak.

So maybe a Hope in another generation, who lost her grandmother to- either the church or monsters? Was it this other Grandmother who *started* the curse?

Dude, what if she’s your Mom?

What if instead of killing her the priest did...something...scared her enough to get her to work for him. And messed with her memory so she couldn’t conceive a way out? And sort of had her transfer the power of the curse to him so that people had to kill him to break it?

What if he had the Church Doctor scoop her brain out and put it in another lady’s head? Who knows.

I’m not certain about the witch being your mom. I think I would like that to be the case because it’s fun, but I’m not quite convinced yet. I AM certain, tho, that the Witch is a Hope, and she cares about you. She’s not just this cackling meanie turning people into flowers. She’s...complicated. And she needs help just as much as all the trapped monsters.

#mairzy posts #night of the full moon #notfm #the werewolf #the witch #the priest #the mystery men #headcanons #character reviews

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xiggy-stardust · 6 years ago

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I can’t please anyone.

None of my friends follow this tumblr so I’m gonna dump my tea in this harbor

“hahaha nobody follows ur dumblr, xig-” SHUT the FUCK UP, ME. I KNOW thats YOU.

okok so over winter break I went shopping for myself because I didn’t get anything for christmas. I was in hot topic (Fuck you, they have some cool shit) and they had a thing where it was “Buy one hoodie and get another for just 10 bucks” so NATURALLY I made the cashier hold my $70 Twenty One Pilots hoodie while I looked for something cheaper to pay in full so I wouldn’t have to pay 70 bucks for a hoodie. I found this really cool Kingdom Hearts jacket for just 40 bucks.

One of my friends, let’s call them Wendy, LOVES KH to DEATH. I was becoming really good friends with her since I’ve only met her this school year (so I’ve known her since about august) and we became best friends really fast. We have more inside jokes than I can count, which I think is what really makes you best friends. Wendy and I have lunch together like every day after school and we sit and talk for hours about everything or sometimes nothing at all. The point is, we’re close.

I also have another friend, let’s call them Nina. Nina and I have been friends for longer than Wendy and I have been friends, since about sophomore year (and it’s senior year now). And Nina and Wendy have been friends since elementary school. So really, I’m the one late to the party. It was very clear very early on this year that Nina was getting jealous about how close Wendy and I have been getting despite us not knowing each other for very long. This reeked of petty high school drama, and me, being the only person in school not caught up in shit, refused to be dragged into something I had no intention of being a part of.

The thing about Nina though, is that she has hella insecurity issues and I’ve already sent her novels over text trying to convince her that she’s not a piece of shit. She thinks everybody hates her and she (very clearly) baits me and Wendy into pitying her. Every time I talk to her, it’s another thing she thinks everybody’s gonna hate her for. Every time. She never takes responsibility and uses those big puppy eyes to make me say that nothing is ever her fault just so she won’t go home and blow her brains out like I have nightmares of her doing. I’ve talked to her so much about the exact same topic matter that some days when she says “whatever I’m probably just annoying you” I kinda wanna say “yeah you are.” But I know for a fact she’ll go home and probably c*t her wr*sts or something. She never makes any efforts to improve herself. She wallows in her sadness and wants everyone to feel bad for her or wallow with her.

This is where Wendy is a breath of fresh air.

me, Nina, and Wendy are all relentlessly sad for mostly the same reasons, but they both have shitty parents whereas mine are. idek. Divorced but living together like they aren’t, it’s weird. I digress. We all deal with our sadness in different ways. I deal with mine by myself in my own time and only let it out in the form of ironic memes and self deprecating humor. You gotta really dig deep to get to me and I have to trust you a lot to let u know what’s really going on. But for me, you don’t get to know unless you ask. That’s how I avoid bringing down the people around me to awkward situations. Wendy acknowledges whats wrong with her and actively talks to me or other trusted friends to fix what’s wrong. She doesn’t want people to feel bad for her, she wants to be better and she doesn’t stew in her sadness because that’s bad for literally everyone.

Nina is the total opposite. We were just in the middle of UIL rehearsals today and WHILE I was highlighting and trying to memorize my lines, Nina grills me about the jacket I got Wendy for christmas when I didn’t get her anything. Wendy actually warned me she would ask so I gave her one of my printed photos earlier this morning. She said she felt left out, so naturally I lied and said I had it from the start, which I totally didn’t, and the only reason I didn’t give it to her before is because she was literally in another state stuck in a blizzard and when she came back, she was cut from the play we were in and we had to travel to perform the day she got back. So today was the only day I’ve actually seen her. So even if I DID get her something, she wouldn’t get it till today anyway. And I STILL got her something. She still tried to guilt trip me about how she felt “left out” and how she’s “forgotten” like I haven’t talked to her about it more times than I care to think about.

The thing is, Wendy is really easy to shop for. She likes KH, Overwatch, and cute anime things, and every store I shop at has a surplus of one of those things. I had a slight suspicion Nina would get jealous so I tried to find something for her,, but she has zero interests I can shop for. She likes Vinyl records, but no store in the nearest 100 miles sells vinyl. It’s not like she likes comic books or video games or stuffed animals or.. anything. I cannot shop for her. The original Idea was to go thrift shopping just the three of us, and I buy Nina anything she wants because I know she likes thrifted items and we’ve been wanting to go thrifting together for months. BUT Nina was out of the state and her parents wouldn’t tell her how long she’d be there so I couldn’t schedule anything when she got back. The blizzard she was stuck in would have fucked it up anyway but still. The idea is, it would have been impossible to get Nina what she wants. But I don’t think she sees that. She only saw that Wendy got a gift from me and she didn’t. Now might be a good time to point out that Wendy didn’t get anything for christmas because her family considers it a big waste of money (which it is, but Wendy has never experienced a single christmas in her life). So yeah naturally I’d want to get her something. Besides the jacket I got her, the only other thing Wendy got for christmas is a KH Funko pop from another friend. Thats it. So excuse me if I wanted to make this christmas a little bit more happy for her.

Besides the point, but just a side note, I didn’t get anything for christmas either. It’s not like I’m hard to shop for either, I like the same things Wendy likes (minus KH maybe) and I like flannels and beanies A LOT. And they’re stupid easy to find, especially in winter. But all I got was a heartfelt letter from another friend who is too sweet to be in this story. I got a letter and none of my other friends got me anything. Not Nina or Wendy. But I never not once complained about it while I saw all my friends give and give and give to other people. That’s why I went shopping for myself, so I couldn’t possibly want anything that anybody was giving except for love (cliche, barf, ik, whatever).

So yea it just kinda rubbed me the wrong way when Nina complained about not getting anything. EXcuse you. I should really be the one complaining, cuz I’m 40 bucks in the hole on a jacket I’ll never wear and Wendy’s only worn like once since I gave it to her. I didn’t get anything either, I actually lost here. Wendy’s got another jacket she’ll never wear, so that only seems like a plus to me and she didn’t get anybody anything, but only cuz she doesn’t have money and her parents won’t let her get a real job. And you haven’t gained or lost anything. If we really wanna be equal, let’s all get gifts for each other. Unless we all come out down and up 2 gifts, somebody’s got a right to complain, and if we look at who’s lost the most, it looks like it’s me. But I’m not going to because I don’t need a gift to validify my friendships. I gave to a friend who it looked like needed it the most out of pure goodwill. I don’t expect anything in return, and I think there’s a thing on the internet about how if you talk about how charitable you are, your charity is null and void, at least the intent of it is. But I don’t think that counts if the only people I’m talking about can’t read this. Maybe it does, but I gain and lose nothing anyway.

If I gave Nina something or Nina gave me something, Wendy wouldn’t care. If Nina gave Wendy something or Wendy gave Nina something, I wouldn’t care. So I really don’t see the big deal that I gave Wendy something. The only difference I see is that Nina is out of the loop, and she’s the only one who cares if she is.

Idk I could go on forever but I’d just regurgitate the point that Nina, you suck for trying to make me feel bad for doing a nice thing. Please. Fix yourself, because nobody else can.

#vent #venting

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sanhatation · 7 years ago

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Wahh I'm so sorry I haven't sent an ask in like forever! BUT OMG YOUR CALLIGRAPHY!! IS THERE ANYTHING YOU CAN'T DO AHSJDGH I'm learning how to do calligraphy but I only know how to do the lettering sjdkjd how do you make it look so nice!? You're so creative!! I think you stole my talent when I was born 😩 what are some of your hobbies? Or things you like to do? Also have have you been!? Let's see I really love quotes but one of them has stuck with me for awhile now (1/4) -⛄

“People can be so quiet about their pain that you forget they’re hurting. That’s why it’s so important to be kind” those quotes are so beautiful and inspiring I love them!! I think my least favorite song hmmm it used to be cotton candy and star because idk they just didn’t…… Interest me or like call to me idk if that meshes sense but I think cotton candy has grown on me I listen to I a lot more but star idk it still doesn’t have that spark but I really love the lyrics (2/4) -⛄

Astros lyrics are so pretty! My favorite songs hmm I never really thought about it…… The first one that pod into my head is again or lonely I think I those two would have to be my favorite I can listen to them all the time and I keep thinking of sanha’s “hey hello” sjdkjd yes’!! Ahem then mj’s “I’m lonely againnn” I really like how it sounds because it’s like a soft sort of upbeat song if that makes sense but for again I always think of the dance practice video which I loVED omg (¾) - ⛄

That one move!! You know what move in talking about!? During the “떠오르네” I think that part..!!! oml it kills me!! And JUST LOVE HOW THEY ALL LOOK (especially sanha he be killing me!!) and then I also really like how thus me sounds as well and jinjin’s rap I’M!! I LOVE HIS VOICE HE BE SKATING!! And his little twirl AHH! Aha sorry this turned out to be really long 😅 (4/4) -⛄

AAHH thank u so much!!!! i think i picked up calligraphy a little over a year ago??? so ive been practicing a lot ;; and my hobbies yeet i have a lot tbh i love to sing, do graphic design, really any kind of visual art but especially calligraphy, line art, zentangles and painting !! and i enjoy dancing too even tho my skill is …questionable…and i also love photography, acting,,…fashion….astro…

tbh ive been GREAT !!!! smth exciting that happened this week was my sister came home and just last night my brother and his wife arrived and wow its the first time in five years that my whole family is all together !!!! my eldest sister has been in korea..my other sister has been in california..my brother has been at college…so ya its vvvv exciting!!!!! how are YOU?

thats a beautiful quote i love it!!! and i agree. kindness is so important, and when it comes down to it its all that rly matters!!! absolutely no point in being mean or rude for no reason

OK TBH IM SHOCKED !!!! i think Star is definitely a Fandom Fav^TM so ive never heard anyone who’s just eh abt it !! the lyrics to star pull me in so much and the melody itself is v me ig so i love her ! i get that tho, some songs just dont click….sis i love Miss cotton candy tbh she’s probably one of my faves too (a moment of silence for jinjin’s “GIBUNI JOA LA LA LA”)

dude lonely is honestly so underrated. i cant figure out how to explain it…..it’s like……so chill yet so energized? like idk how else to put it other than it perfectly PERFECTLY captures the feeling of Fall???? like ?? there’s some sort of serenity to the breeze and falling leaves yet there’s like…a spark??? an energy and warmth???? aHHH THERES NO WORDS TO DO IT JUSTICE !!! but i know u know what i mean

again….shouldve held on…..she is so beautiful yet sometimes i still Cannot Believe astro produced that song when they did. like i cant even believe its real????? like WOW we didnt deserve her honestly

the dance practice????? we dont TALK abt her……………that One Move…yes i know exactly what ur talking abt and its off limits im sensitive why are they so loud…..literally everything abt the choreography is just so !!!!!!!!!!! BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i gotta say i think my favorite part is legit when they do like the rly cool “blindfold” move !!!! AND ofc moonrock’s SICK spins…and ugh u right they looked so good fhhsasdlkj i love skinny jean-stro

“HE BE SKATING” I CACKLED GHDJSAJ U RIGHT THO ! u ever just think abt his voice in Lie and just :( that man has so much Technique idek anything abt rap but he has TECHNIQUE OKAY

(PS i love reading ur long messages so dont be sorry!!)

#i love talking and rambling #asks #secret aroha ⛄️ ‘17

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nightbts · 8 years ago

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so this is a part 2 to this post x because wow I just have so many headcannons and if anyone would do the pleasure of writing a fic off of it (since I'm a lazy mofo) id greatly appreciate it!!!!

now time to continue my rant:

Marvel Comic Universe / Avengers AU

holy shit yes I just watched Spiderman Homecoming the other day and watched a ton of fmvs on youtube and GIRL IS IN DA FEELS

plus I fricking love superhero movies IGHT

firstly

jimin would be hawkeye bc hawkeye is fit af and he got them great bow and arrow skills and I mean have you seen jiminie’s archery skills like DAMN BOY WE got a Katniss hereeeeeeee also Clint barton is super chill and laid-back and has jimin vibes IN MY OPINION IDEk

jungkook and I know you all want him to be iron man BUT TRUST ME nobody else would make a better Spiderman than jungkook ok just pls trust me on this one. After seeing Spiderman homecoming I just couldn't shake the feeling off with jungkook being spidey cuz jungkook always wants to do his best to impress his elders and be the best he can and always is so giving to others and Spiderman is like that so yea!

namjoon would be doctor strange bc I mean they’re both wise af characters and I just think that they both are awkward and adorable and its just PERf

jIN as captain america bc even tho jin may not be ripped (honestly no offense to bts cuz nobody is as ripped as cap) (maybe Thor) BUT I just think jin stands for the same ideals as cap does and similarly they both hold up the group, are the “oldies” and have these corny jokes that nobody understands and its just gr8

taehyung, oh jesus Lordy, would be deadpool and even though I don’t know much about this character so correct me if you think tae would be someone else, from what I know and Lordy THE EDITS IVE SEEN, taehyung seems like deadpool persona wise and I feel like under all that humor tae rlly does have a kick ass side just like deadpool

Hobie I think would be a great quicksilver like imagine that boy speeding around with his hyper ass self I mean it makes sense ok like seriouslyyy

ok so this one’s hard like idek who yoongi would be in my opinion but imma just give it a shot but maybe ant man? like he's a bit sarcastic and funny like yoongi is but honestly idk guys ! tell me who ya think yoongi should be

Percy Jackson AU

OK I know I already did this bUT I MEAN IT CHARACTER WISE NOW SO LETS GO

jimin would be Percy, as someone who is insecure about himself in the beginning and then grows into a strong leader that everyone admires but at times is still clumsy, loses and is humble I mean come on- that’s jimin guys. plus as I said jimin would def be son of Poseidon so...

hobie would be Leo in my opinion, for obvs reasons, he’s the jokester, the one nobody tends to take seriously but when in the zone and when Hobie knows what he's doing, just like Leo, he kicks ass and astounds everyone

rapmon as annabeth, even tho he's a boy she’s a girl IT DONT MATTER ITS FINE but as I was saying annabeth things logically, there’s always a tactic in her mind when she tries to deal with a problem, just like namjoon and the both of them are head-strong, confident ppl but at times need advice and a shoulder to lean on, which in this case is JIN AKA PIPER

jin would be piper, not only bc he gorgeous and he the son of Aphrodite and shiz but also bc piper is like the momma of the group and she has her charmspeak and gives gr8 advice to the rest of the crew when they need it and I feel like jin is just like that

yoongi would be Nico I mean duh, like as dark and depressing Nico is he also has a bright, brave and snarky side that we see all the time with yoongi and its the gr8est

jungkook and taehyung would be the Stoll twins! Both of em are like partners in crime in their mischievous endeavors and I feel like truly as much as ppl ship them I see them as the greatest of brothers and its heartwarming

Disney Princes AU

jungkook as aladdin bc I mean this boy is the cutest thing, especially around jasmine he's a shy loving fluff ball, just like our kookie would be 100% and just like kookie, aladdin is a lover but when needs to be a fighter to protect his loved ones he will be and jungkook has the biggest heart and biggest dreams just like aladdin does with becoming a prince and being able to live in the palace

OK and ALSO HE WOULD BE Hercules on the low (okay more like highkey) but yes yes you see its perfect I just can't explain it BUT IT IS

ok so don’t shoot me but jimin would be prince eric and its solely based of this picture/ outfit cuz DAYUm x but it doesn't end there both prince eric and jimin are so openminded and compassionate towards what they love its shows in what they do, like jimin and his dancing and eric and ariel

yoongi would be prince Adam aka the BeaSt bc its ob isn't it, they're both cold on the outside but super caring and warmhearted and all it takes is a lil love to bring it out. plus the both of them have been through so much, they truly deserve the world.

taehyung would be Flynn rider, even tho he isn't a prince technically, it works. they're both sarcastic and funny but deep-down their responsible and caring and know right from wrong. they both make mistakes but they fix it along the way, showing true growth.

Hobie would be prince naveen since they're both outgoing, love to danceeee and are always trying to have a great time no matter what but at the same time they both know to get where they wanna go they gotta work hard and they both do that tremendously

namjoon would Shang bc I mean come onnnn guys! He's got that leadership, tough and charming quality about him that just screams Shang like we’ve only seen the clumsy, funny side but we know that when he gets serious that man gets serious and thats why he’s the leader, just like General Shang

jin would be Prince Charming bc he is ofc charming but offhandedly stubborn when he needs to be just like Charming was when he searched the entire kingdom to find his precious cinderella

ALSO SEND ME ANY HEADCANNONS AKA AUs THAT YOU GUYS HAVE CUZ ID LOVE TO READ THEM AND REPLY :)

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yourfavoritewerewolf · 8 years ago

Note

all of them (or the first 5)

Dont underestimate me i Will do all of them go big or go home (under the cut tho im not heartless)

1.Do you want a boyfriend or girlfriend?

hhhhahahaha maybe (yes)

2.When did your last hug take place?

sunday

3.Are you a jealous person?

sometimes yeah

4.Are you tired right now?

Yep

5.Do you chew on your straws?

not on purpose

6.Have you ever been called a tease?

yes and i actually am bc commitment who?

7.Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight?

no, my record is 25

8.Do you cry easily?

yea sometimes.

9.What should you be doing right now?

lowkey existential crisis and fic writing (edit: i read this as what i am doing, but i have nothing i Should be doing rn)

10.Are you a heavy sleeper?

usually? weird things wake me up tho

11.Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months?

UH IDK DUDE

12.Are you mad at someone right now?

yea. lemony snicket for killing my idealism

13.Do you believe in love?

yea

14.What makes you laugh no matter what?

i cant think of anything but.. probably something in my #fave tag

15.Who was the last person you talked to?

my mom just now

16.Do you get butterflies around the person you like?

shut the h*ck your mouth

17.Will you get married?

? who knows dude

18.When was the last time you smiled?

i smiled at a baby at work yesterday

19.Does anyone like you?

WHo TF KNOWS MY DUDE

20.Do you secretly like someone?

sshut up

21.Who was the first person you talked to today?

my mom. thanks mom

22.Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?

@foxaes and @annehairball and some of my other roommates

23.What are you NOT looking forward to?

going back to school and seeing my roommate being super cuddly with her bf

24.What ARE you looking forward to?

going back to school

25.Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you they loved you, and meant it?

romantically, no

26.Suppose you see your ex kissing another person what would you do?

id be like “what universe is this where ive dated people”

27.Do you plan on moving out within the next year?

its a possibility

28.Are you a forgiving person?

i try to be?

29.How many TRUE friends do you have?

like, 3

30.Do you fall for people easily?

LMAO YEA

31.Have you ever fallen for your ex’s best friend?

again, wrong universe

32.What’s the last thing you put in your mouth?

tater tots

33.Who was the last person you drove with?

my little sister

34.How late did you stay up last night and why?

i went to bed at like 10 bc im exhausted from work

35.If you could move somewhere else, would you?

yeah probably

36.Who was the last person you took a picture of?

idek i dont usually take pics of other people

37.Can you live a day without TV?

yea easily

38.When was the last time you were extremely disappointed?

JUST TODAY. THANKS NETFLIX

39.Three names you go by..

paige. thats it

40.Are you currently in a relationship?

lmao

41.What is your all-time favorite romance movie?

UH i dont.. know…

42.Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate?

in fiction, yeah. idk about real life though

43.What’s your current problem?

everything

44.Have you ever had your heart broken?

hhhahahaha

45.Your thoughts of long distance relationships

kudos to someone who can do ‘em but it aint me

46.How many kids do you want to have?

heck if i know, itll prob be like 3 bc im scared of pain

47.Have you ever found it hard to tell someone you like them?

no lie ive only ever told one person i liked them and it took me almost 4 years

#yjh

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nobodywillfindthisurl · 8 years ago

Text

Fml i hate my anxiety. It's like i just can't seem to socialise at all anymore like my social skills are so rusty that i know what im meant to do in social situations like "oh, heres where i make a joke" or whatever but cant think of how to do it idk, the thing is people really wanna help but my confidence is just so fuckin low that nobody can touch it to bring it up as hard as they try, and its cause theyre trying and i can see that and im so grateful they try but i also hate myself for the fact that they have to try. I hate being that guy in peoples lives. I hate being super awkward and not gelling with anyone. I hate being so scarred that idek how to be close to people anymore. I hate not being able to hide my problems. Im completely emasculated. My issues emasculate me and i feel emasculated when people are trying to help or boost my confidence or whatever. Why do i have to be that guy? Why cant i be normal? Why cant i have fun on a night out? Why do i have to kill the vibe? Why do i have to be hyper aware? People are troopers, some people have been trying to befriend me all summer without any real success. And ive been trying too, hard as fuck, but i just feel sometimes like im too damaged to ever be able to make a friend again. And i barely have any, if i even really have any. Im just so emasculated and below everyone. Its so wierd with my friends, my anxiety got super bad and then i was awkward with them and then it just made it awkward and i cant fix it. My brother i think told everyone about my issues cause he was trying to help but again its so emasculating. Im just broken, they're doing the right things and even a year ago that would have completely fixed shit for me but now i just cant help but have a negative outlook on it all. It just destroys my confidence and makes me just hate being so weak. I dont know whats gonna help me and that scares the fuck out of me like you couldnt understand. Because im super scared that nothing will, or that nothing can. I dont believe in myself one bit. Everytime i see people its like a fuckin trigger cause everything ive written springs to my mind and im just done for already at that point. I have flashes of relative social success, but they're flashes. I was doing so well recently, then last night it was more of the same. It still hasnt fully hit me yet the position im in and i cant let it either. But knowing that is a fucking curse in itself. I just really fuckin love everyone whos trying to help me and i feel so guilty that i cant show them success for their efforts. I just feel like im constantly letting everyone down, and i am constantly letting myself down. The fucking pressure i feel in my mind is indescribable, but its really, really fucking intense. I dont want to die, or commit suicide, or anything like that, i just want to be better but im really terrified that i never will be. And ive barely been able to take this last year, especially this summer, and to continue like this isnt a life worth living. But i still want to live. I want to live and not be in so much pain, and it almost feels like thats having my cake and eating it too. My mind is so broken. Im a broken person. I just neeeeeeddddd to be close to someone. Im not close to anyone at the minute. You dont know how fucking brutal that is, or how it feels. It's the worst experience. I cant put into words how shit it is. But i dont know if i can get close to people. I just have so many scars and barriers. Its like the way ive been feeling since i woke up, its that pressure and these thoughts and feelig shit about every aspect of my self and for being myself, i cant do that for long. I cant take that. I will if it persists. But its just not fair. Its not right. And i dont talk like that much because i dont believe in the concept of deserving per say, but its true. Nothing deserves this pain. I just wish i could tell an actual, real person this shit that i was super close to and i could cry and they would cry with me, for me. I just need someone who views me as an equal, im not on anyones level because of my problems, everyones babysitting me practically. And i keep getting fucked up on nights out cause its the only way for me to be not horrifically awkward and i hate myself for it the next day cause being super drunk or high or both is always gonna lead to awkward and embarrassing moments and when i remember them i cant get them out of my head. If anyone is reading this, please, love yourself. Look at your percieved flaws and realise that in the grand scheme of things, they dont matter. They dont exist. You're not perfect because perfection by definition is hypothetical but you're more than good enough. People in your life love you. You're close to people, and they're close to you. And for a reason, even if you dont feel like you know what that reason is. Its because they like you, simple as. You're not only worth their time, but they want to spend some of their limited time on this earth with you, and thats fucking special if you think about it. You have to love yourself.

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