Sad QSMP headcannons that have like half a toenail in canon.
The French version:
Baghera cries very silently, like someone who is used to having to keep quiet.
She also has a very high pain tolerance and she didn't understand why until recently.
When Pomme disappeared Baghera was terrified that the Federation had something to do with that, terrified that her little girl would be at the hands of the people who made her and hurt her so badly.
As much as she wants to hate the Federation for having hurt her, at the same time she can't and that makes everything so much worse.
Baghera doesn't have wings. But she does have two scars on her back where no feathers have ever grown.
Antoine was not prepared to actually get attached to any of the French, or even to Pomme. He knows he is in too deep, has too much to lose if he cuts ties with the Federation, and yet it twists something inside of him when he thinks about their possible reactions, especially Etoiles. For the first time in a very long existence he understands what friendship is, knows what it feels like instead of just watching others experience it, and is very aware that he will lose it all.
That is why Antoine was so pissed off at Osito for being careless with the picture, the earlier they discover about his true past, the earlier he will lose them.
If the Federation truly had Pomme he would have burned it all down himself just to bring her back.
The first time Cucurucho saw Antoine angry was after the torture session nearly killed Pierre for good. No one knows who was more shocked by his display, Cucurucho or Antoine himself.
Pierre continues to trouble sleeping and constant nightmares when he does, he can't remember the last time he managed to truly rest without waking up in a cold sweat or screaming, he is always on the verge of passing out and even when he does crash he still has nightmares.
He refuses to acknowledge it or even talk about it, hides his exhaustion with everything he has, pushes people away just to make sure they wouldn't realize there is something wrong, too afraid they will see a weakness to be exploited.
Pierre hates being alone as much as he craves it- He likes being by himself working on his machines and keeping his secrets close to his chest, but at the same time when he is alone is when the dark thoughts take over
He will, on occasion, not exactly seek to get himself hurt but not exactly avoid it either- If he can feel pain it means that there is something human in him doesn't it?
But Pierre hates dying and he will avoid and lash out when put into such a situation. He fears what will wake up, if it will still be him.
Sometimes Kameto look at the rest of the Islanders and he wonders what his own life could have been, what sort of bonds he could have forged with people, if the Federation didn't come for him first.
Etoiles does not know what his worth is if not as a warrior.
He is not smart like the others, he doesn't build pretty buildings or incredible machines, he doesn't know how to do anything but fight. And if he can't fight, if he can't protect the people he cares about, then why is he still around?
War is everything Etoiles really knows. By the time he reached his late teens and was released from the battlefield he had seen more combat than some people in their old age, everything he knew how to do was to fight, he had nowhere to go, knew no one, had nothing.
He was never able to settle down for too long or even to truly build himself a home, Etoiles knew so very little about the world that he just decided he would explore it. Some people in the army talked about things they missed, things they thought worth fighting for, and Etoiles wanted to understand that feeling of fighting for anything but his own survival.
To this day he still feel more comfortable fighting than he ever does doing anything else.
None of them ever had families.
The concept of family was something Antoine learned by watching other species and for a very long time it was not something he truly understood or could relate. It was only after the plane crash and Pomme that it hit him that maybe he can understand this thing now.
Baghera always thought she was just an orphan with amnesia. She had very little memories of her young years and none of them involved other people, just her and a room, so for a long time she believed she was alone in the world. Even now she struggles with that emptiness, especially now that she knows that the Federation may be the closest thing to family that she will ever have.
Etoiles had parents once. He knows he did, but he cannot remember their faces or even their voices most of the time. He was still just a small child when they came for him and sent him to war.
Pierre was always alone. He had parents but they could as well be ghosts haunting their home, he hardly could see glimpses of them from time to time, all he ever truly had were his machines.
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I just think Tallulah gets to be upset about this. “It’s not Wilbur’s fault” “He’s not a bad dad” “He loves his daughter so much” yes! These are all true! And it’s not his fault! But he’s still not there. And Tallulah has gone through so much and still hasn’t seen him, the one time he was around was the one time she wasn’t, and all she has are letters and “I’m thinking of you always” and things that used to be theirs together, but he’s still not there. She’s waited and she’s been patient and she’s loved him all the same, and he’s still not there. Like yesterday, and the day before, and the day before, from the happy milestones to the traumatic events, he’s still not there.
She knows that it’s not his fault, but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s absent. That in and of itself just adds to the sorrow, because she knows why he’s gone, and she’s been told time and time again it doesn’t mean he doesn’t care, she knows this - it doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting, that it doesn’t hurt, that she doesn’t yearn for her father to be there more than anything in the world, and he’s just not there.
So yes, she gets to be upset, and be caustic, and stomp her feet and write bitter messages, and be angry and vitriolic, because she’s a little girl missing her father, who feels things with her whole heart and soul - and that means she gets to feel the ugly parts of it, too.
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I feel bad for Starlo.
Star has a point, idk what the four were ticked off about, there is like 99% chance everyone willingly participated in the trolley problem, based on what we've seen of his behavior thus far it's not like Starlo to be that big of a jerk/drag them by force/yell at them to do it. Ed's words:
he does it because Star asks NICELY
clearly jealous
It genuinely seemed like a fun time/fun roleplay, especially since every day is the same. Like, the five are supposed to be a rowdy and adventures bunch, what exactly did Starlo do wrong, I'm genuinely confused and curious. Except taking a big liking in Clover (his posse should know that this is a big moment for him, according to Blackjack they've known each other since high school and had the same liking for westerns. So they were basically a nerd gang.) Starlo was kind, patient and considerate towards Clover the whole time, even warned Mooch about them not being bandits, taught Clover gun safety, wanted to bring his posse along for a fun time, thanked Ace for telling him about getting Clover a new hat...
Sure, at first he only liked Clover for being a human, but as Ceroba says, that changed and he grew to genuinely care about them, plus I can't help but think Star saw himself in Clover and that's part of the reason he was so proud of them all the time even when they messed up (I'll talk more about this at some point)
What exactly made Ace want to leave the gang? He even said how he doesn't mind "getting run over by the fake train"
he's so nice. says sorry for forgetting the safety goggles even when he was scatterbrained due to his excitement. I love him so much
The only real "faults" (I'll call them temporary faults) I saw in Star during the Wild East section was that he was even more enthusiastic and more proud than usual. But how couldn't he be when he met a member of the species that he has admired for so long because they have real cowboys and sheriffs on the surface (who are seen as brave heroes who deliver justice, while Star canonically feels like a nobody farmer). His posse should have realized Clover wouldn't be there forever and just let their boss enjoy himself with his "deputy who'd have to leave sooner or later anyway"(or be more patient with him/ask him why he feels this strongly towards Clover/if there's a deeper reason for that). His friends including Ceroba just turn their back on him so quickly instead. The moment he's gotten the chance to feel valued for once and put himself first and not have to take care of this whole town and everyone in it and live his dream of meeting a real human, suddenly "his personality is damaged?"
Star's literally built this whole town, organised everything, he worries about everyone, Ceroba (plus was the one to give her emotional strength before and after Clover's sacrifice), Kanako, the monsters, his family, struggles with feelings of worthlessness yet never wipes that smile off his face, always does his best to be hopeful and optimistic and make others laugh, gave his posse a nap time so they don't become exhausted, gave Ceroba a free home, didn't act upon his feelings towards her and was a 110% supportive, caring friend instead. THAT'S who he is. He's the papa bear of this friend group, the glue holding everyone together.
He was just *really* excited. Y'all know he's insecure and just wishes to escape who he is and yet y'all blame him for liking Clover so much. Yeah, the four are very clearly jealous. But why won't the four of you control your feelings for a while? As mentioned, Clover WILL HAVE TO LEAVE EVENTUALLY. They won't be Star's "deputy" forever (the kid who's just as into westerns as he is, who values justice just as much, who also values doing the right thing. Someone he clearly felt understood in the presence of, whom he loved; just look at the way he talks about Clove during Showdown). Star seems genuinely confused of what he did wrong poor guy just wanted to live his fantasy for once and feel important:
Even at the beginning Moray's like "oh no Martlet is upset" Mooch replies "don't be a buzzkill nothing exciting ever happens around here" and Ray's like "Yeah you've got a point"
If you all agreed to have a little fun with a human who will very soon leave forever why is Starlo's enthusiasm such a big problem? If the posse weren't into this after all (unless they were simply too jealous which could have been solved with a honest talk and a little patience) why are you doing this "rowdy" job with Star in the first place? Do you want your boring routine day to day life so much back? Or just for Clover to leave (which they will soon enough)? You, western enthusiasts, literally met a real human, A HUMAN FROM WESTERNS YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE PASSIONATELY INTO (clearly not as passionate as Star but passionate ENOUGH to understand where he's coming from).
... okay.
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au where miles gets arrested yet again and phoenix has to prove his innocence yet again in court. while in the middle of the trial, he gets stuck and can’t figure out how to prove his friend’s innocence.
he’s just about completely given up mentally when he hears a voice telling him not to keep going and that he can’t give in yet.
phoenix looks over, expecting that it’s maya channeling mia, and is shocked to see who it is.
maya is channeling someone… but it’s miles’ dad, gregory. he showed up to help phoenix, not wanting to see his son to be put in jail for a crime he didn’t commit.
with the guidance of gregory, he’s able to prove that miles is innocent and figure out who actually committed the crime. after the trial, miles and gregory have a talk that they desperately needed to have, and miles is finally able to get some closure.
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Sometimes i think about Clexa being so soft just hugging, eyes closed and swaying slowly side to side 🥹
Ya know that's something I've thought a lot about and maybe it's a side note but I'm gonna rant on it.
I tend to find a lot of canon fics write Lexa as this standoffish person, not very affectionate or openly giving of acts of touch, but I say look at the facts here.
Lexa was an extremely expressive person in non-verbal ways. She was so very obviously a women of "actions speak louder than words." And when you take that into consideration, let's look at how she conducted herself around Clarke.
First of all, the girl was always putting herself in Clarke's space. And I'm not talking general vicinity, I'm talking
fuckin literally in her space. Like,,, if someone stood that close to me in line I'd have to drop a "bitch give me two feet. Damn 😒" on em. She liked to get close.
Second, where I think sometimes the crossed wires come from with Lexa's character and how she shows emotion is that they're taking how Lexa acts as the commander and applying it to how she is on a personal level. But in my opinion, I think that doesn't do her justice. Because you have to remember, the majority of her time on s2 was spent with her dealing with the fact that Clarke was angry with her. She was trying to be respectful of Clarke's wishes for distance, thus bottling up her emotions for Clarke's comfort. But even still, even with all that, it still bled through.
God bless her, but the girl
Was not very good
At holding back her desire
And more than that, Lexa very much welcomed Clarke's touch
(Nice move for the thigh there wanheda ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )
She never shied away from it or seemed to do anything other than soak it up.
And from the start!
Lexa!
Initiated!
Contact!
She pushed for kisses and she pushed to be closer. She was the one who tipped the tension between them into the romantic arena. She showed physical and emotional intimacy time and again with Clarke, from being willing to take a damn nap with Clarke in her tent to bowing at her feet when the commander bows before no one. She took Clarke's hand and held it and accepted that comfort that Clarke offered, freely. She even trusted Clarke with a damn blade pressed to her neck for God's sake. She was never ever wary of letting Clarke touch her, even when she herself was working to hold back her desire to touch. And when they finally made love it was Lexa who pulled Clarke to her bed and guided her down into a kiss. Clarke may have initiated the kiss because Lexa wouldn't have over stepped the boundary Clarke laid down, but I'll be damned if Lexa didn't immediately go for gold after 🤷♀️
My point through all of this is that yes, I believe without a doubt that if they'd been allowed to be together longer, they would've been such an intensely affectionate couple in their own ways. With Clarke, who is a demonstrative person at her core and whose love language is visibly touch, and Lexa, who shows her love in small, subtle ways because she's so used to having it smacked away or buried under obligation and tradition, you'd have this couple who in the safety of each other would allow themselves a chance to just be soft. To touch and comfort and soothe. To breathe each other in and just be Clarke and Lexa, not Commander snd Wanheda. I think they would've fallen asleep in each other's arms and hugged most mornings before going their separate ways. I think it would've been entirely normal for Clarke to hug Lexa from behind as Lexa looked out from her balcony over Polis. And I don't think Lexa would've been shy in her appreciation of Clarke's affection, nor in returning her own.
There's a reason why everyone knew of their feelings for each other and why not once did Lexa deny it even when confronted about it. In reality, she doubled down on it by kicking a clan member off the tower and inviting Clarke to stay despite the kill order. Both pretty brazen when you think about it.
If given the chance they both would've been all in and you'll never convince me otherwise.
Indra wouldn't have known a moment's peace 😔
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