#idk if this is a normal thing people do i'm so sorry if this is Really Weird 9^9;;

[thefooljester]

could u write maybe a little fic/scenerio where reader and Toby are in a very like calm, relaxed, comfortable environment, I’d say Toby and reader are very close. Anyways Toby takes off his mask and reader is admiring his scars. With a more gentle gaze, not judging or disgusted. And that’s when Toby realizes he likes reader!

What a cute request! + big thanks for the compliment you left in my anon box, i appreciate it alot :3 i hope you like this (and i'm sorry for specifying the reader's gender like this, i just didn't know how to rewrite this as gn in the "scenraio") - - - - - -

toby realizes he’s in love [+ scenario?]

features: ticci toby

reader: female

warnings: maybe body horror? idk scar description but not graphic, i promise

...

You don’t mind Toby’s scars and treat him kindly – He realizes that he loves you Meeting:

"Oh. ...Oh. I... I didn't expect... I mostly tutor kids, but... u-um... Are you...", you looked down at your clipboard, "...Tobias?"

Said man in question could only nod at your inquiry, not really expecting someone like you to open the door either. It happened on a whim, as most things in his life do, but he really did want to put time and effort into finding a tutor to learn more - or rather... relearn everything.

It might be a bit difficult, simply because he never graduated high school and, on top of everything, forgot most things about his childhood, only really remembering some core memories ...most of them terrible.

Toby really wanted to participate in society again, though. He's left his "previous occupation" behind and ignored the voices in his head... and the static. He wants to put all of that behind him and start anew.

But. Um... He expected a kind older lady, someone who'd remind him of his mother – did he even have a mother, by the way? He doesn’t remember – or something, not... you. You were basically his age and you were so nice to him so far, despite his battered appearance.

"Is everything okay?" Your eyes swam around nervously. ...or so he thought.

"I have Tourette's. The tics are normal, don't worry." He replied without thinking, a sigh escaping his lips. He's needed to explain himself a million times already... What's one more time going to change? Still, he thought that… he’d seem like less of a freak these days.

"Yeah, okay... but... I meant... Don't you want to come in? I don't usually teach outside. Is that uncomfortable? I promise I have no ulterior motives or anything. You… didn’t reply to me…"

Oh. Right. Yeah. Right! Toby smiled, conscious of the bandage covering the gash in his cheek. The wound has healed up by now, but had never been able to close up entirely. He knew that normal people would find it quite gross to look at, especially because drool would sometimes seep out of the literal hole in his cheek. And... He didn't want to scare you away.

"I...I-I'll come in, thank you." He said bashfully.

He looked around curiously. He's been living with Tim and Brian in a cabin for so long that he forgot how regular homes look... especially because he's never been at a girl's - um, woman's - house before. It was... very nice.

"Do you want something to drink? I have water, tea, coffee, juice... milk?, probably. Whatever you want."

He wanted to nod, feeling his mouth dry up and his heart flutter in nervousness by merely looking into your eyes, …but then quickly shook his head instead, remembering his scarred face. He'd have to tilt his head so far back to ensure that no liquid escape his mouth, otherwise you'd definitekly grow suspicious. He can't have that.

"O-okay. Just ask if you want something, yeah? Let's see... I... well, I mostly teach everything up to 8th grade but most p-parents want me to teach Math and Science. What do your k-kids need help with, if you don't mind me asking?"

You're really gentle... He liked that a lot about you. He would almost claim that he'd felt safe around you if he hadn't been so hyper-aware of himself.

"My kids?" Toby wanted to giggle but only managed a wry smile – did he look so old? - and added,”I… need a teacher…” "You need a teacher?" You repeated, tilting your head to the side with wide eyes, at which Toby blushed, "I... Forgive me, but... I might have misjudged your appearance. I thought you were an adult, but if you’re in 10th grade and about to graduate, then I don't kn..."

"No, no, I am. I am an adult." He looked away from you, embarrassed about admitting this, "I'm 24, but... I dropped out. Years ago. I want to learn everything now though... to get a job...and yeah." Toby has never felt this awkward in his entire life. Never - and he's had his moments. Here he was, confessing his messy circumstances to a stunning, intelligent woman.

God should just strike him down right now.

"Tobias, sorry, but... I'm no real teacher. I can't give you a high school diploma or any other qualification." You looked disappointed on his behalf. You definitely had a kind heart.

"That's fine... I didn't expect that much when I contacted you. I'm doing this for me." He added, nervously chewing on his bottom lip before he stopped, knowing that it was weird.

You looked to be deep in thought, considering his reasoning.

It would only be fair if you shot him down now. If anything, he expected as much.

"Then... sure. Yeah! I think it's admirable, to be honest. You're a good guy, I'm happy to teach you!"

Ah, don't play with his heart like that...

"You can just call me Toby, by the way. Everyone does..." "Okay, Toby." You chuckled, causing him to shuffle his feet…

He so wasn’t used to this.

...

Listen. I don’t want to be the first one to say it but someone has to say it: Toby is a loser – like, socially speaking. He cannot talk to people, how was he supposed to talk to women? Such a beautiful one at that… and you smiled at him… as shallow as it may be, that alone was enough to have him interested in you.

Now, he wouldn’t ever dare to openly flirt with you! He thinks that the relationship you two have is strictly platonic! Even if he becomes good friends with you, even if he appreciates you so much for selflessly helping him… all platonic. Toby doesn’t like you, okay! You’re just a close friend who helps him through his hardships and offers great life advice. He can’t deal with rejection.

Plus… well, he wouldn’t ever dream of admitting his feelings to himself because he knew that you wouldn’t want this whole mess.

...That doesn’t mean that he doesn’t want to be near. Far from it! He wants to be around you all the time, and he adores the fact that you’ve become so comfortable with him that you invite him over.

On such a day, you admitted that you just wanted to have someone with you because you had a stressful week. Work has been difficult and you had to deal with some personal problems on top of everything. You told him that you needed him “here” because he “never fails to cheer you up”… No, Toby! Hold your horses, she obviously doesn’t mean it like that… But his heart never stops fluttering, even if he tries ignoring it.

It��s been some time since you met and you, over these past months, fell into a quaint routine that mostly involved you two sitting on the couch… comfortably close to one another. Still… all platonic though. Friends can sit next to each other and talk until the sun comes up… all while he’s nervously bouncing his leg and sweating like crazy. It’s perfectly normal!

He notices that you’re quieter than usually… and offers to hug you – impulsive decision… he was about to take it back and apologize, but you just muttered a “please.”

How could he deny any of your pleas?

Awkwardly, he put his pale arm around your shoulder, breath shaky as soon as he felt your warmth against his scarred skin.

Boldly, he tried pushing his luck by laying his head on top of yours as a way to get even closer to you, but your pout and quiet whine made him shoot up and get away from you immediately. Toby was ready to apologize in multiple languages at that point.

“Your bandage scratched me… it’s itchy…”

Oh. Of course. Why didn’t he think of that? He only wanted to please you.

So he took it off with a boyish grin, immediately noticing how your eyes zeroed in on… oh. Oh my God! How could he forget?!

“Sorry! Sorry, I-I wasn’t thinking?! I know it’s, l-listen, I know that it’s… uh…”

Shit. He wanted to die. That thing was beyond obvious…

“Did it hurt?” You asked gently, your hand hovering just above the gash that revealed parts of his gums and teeth, the very scar that proved his past mistakes for everyone who had eyes.

“No?” Toby replied, sheepishly smiling down at you… he couldn’t feel pain – he told you as much, but you… you still wanted to know. You just wanted to make this easier on his soul, didn't you? Your kindness knows no limits, but you don't have to lie to him...

“Are you sure? You… Can I touch your cheek?”

He… was he going deaf?

“Sure…”

He took a deep breath in and closed his eyes, not wanting to be faced with the disgust you’d surely express once you realized how hard and damaged the scar tissue is… how much courage it took him to look in the mirror sometimes… He knew that is was a grim sight, that is was gross and… just branded him as the sicko he is, deep down.

Your touch burned him. He wanted to cry at your feather-like caresses that traced the edges of his damaged skin, humming at its strange texture.

“I’m just glad it healed up nicely.”

He opened his eyes. Yours were filled with concern… and relief, mostly. You… you were so tender, weren’t you? How could he doubt you for a second… of course you wouldn’t judge or gag at the sight. Of course you’d accept him.

Toby felt his cheeks burn – and if he were able to observe himself, he would have seen that his pupils dilated, practically exploding with love for you.

Oh, he was down bad.

[harocat]

Perhaps this is inaccurate, but does it ever feel to you like general cdrama fandom takes the FL being a “mature” character as the end-all indicator of the show’s quality? Recently with legend of Shenli I see quite a few people start their praise along the lines of “unlike those other garbage xianxia with their annoying FLs”. And often it becomes clear they’re trashtalking Lbfad specifically

This is not just Cdrama fandom, it's fandom on the whole; the girlbossification of female characters.

I've generally always favored characters that get this treatment. Riza Hawkeye (badass) vs. Winry Rockbell (immature), Sango (badass) vs Kagome (immature). Sorry those examples are anime, but they're very well known so 🤷

These are also often healer characters, which is a trope that tends to be... sort of maligned. How dare a women be relegated to just being a healer! But IDK, I'd rather have a well written healer than a generic, flatly written warrior any day. XLH would definitely fall under the healer class.

(One good thing I've noticed is that while all the above mentioned girls got a lot of hate back in the day, as time has gone on, they've grown to become beloved characters. You rarely see hate for any of them nowadays. It's great.)

Keeping in mind fandom's general disinterest in women, so naturally the appreciation that does exist is often extremely shallow. Characters that tend to catch their attention because of this are ones that are 'badass' or that they want to 'step on them' or whatnot. A character that starts out more mature is more likable to them because they don't need to look beyond the surface to see how 'cool' she is.

This is not an implication that Shenli is a shallow character (I am only on ep twelve, so I'm not here to give any kind of overall impression), but just that she from the beginning has more traits that are easy for people to glom onto as a 'strong female character' Do these specific people (this is obviously not all fans of Shenli) who say 'finally a mature character' write meta about Shenli? Do they gush on her and share fanworks and create and all the like. Generally no, because in my experience people who like characters for 'girlboss' reasons don't really appreciate them beyond the surface.

These people will gripe about characters like XLH, sing the praises of 'strong female characters', then go back to only caring about male characters 90% of the time.

Xiao Lanhua takes too much work for these kinds of fans. Obviously we know she is strong, we know she is badass and brave, but the XLH we meet at the beginning is silly, immature, and boy crazy. To appreciate her character fully, you have to do more than just look for five seconds and go 'wow badass'. She's a layered, richly written character, but she doesn't start out as the kind of character that fits a girlboss reading.

On the other hand, almost because of this, you can find pages and pages of meta, fic, and fanworks about her, and almost any fan of hers can give you a plethora of reasons they love her that have actual depth.

On the subject of maturity, it's often a case of the kind of immaturity that's acceptable. Dongfang Qingcang is deeply immature at the start of the series. I don't need to explain why.

But his immaturity is appealing to fandom; cute, likable, and funny. It's good immature, cool immature. And I think this is because in addition to being a male character, we're also taught that being immature like Xiao Lanhua is--- is like... a horrible thing to be? But that's not the case at all. It's just normal! Again, back to girlboss feminism. Women and female characters are held to an impossibly high standard. Female characters that act in a way that might be seen as cringe (if they aren't also badass)? Yikes.

Yes, Xiao Lanhua starts out flighty and silly, but she's also a hard worker, and even from the beginning, she's courageous (despite her timidity when confronted with bullies). She's a good character, even at the beginning; she is lovable, charming, and so, so funny. People just refuse to see beyond their first impression.

The goal in writing a female character should be to make them well written, and in that sense, Xiao Lanhua is a great character. She just happens to also be extremely brave and badass, but some people are too shallow to see it. At this point in time I don't even argue with XLH haters. I'm just like 'well fine, I'd rather not have you here anyway.'

[skibasyndrome]

I'm about to throw all my academic values overboard to get this fucking article done

[obnoxiousarcade]

im thinking again

[da-proti-toku-grem]

feeling like a total asshole today 👍

[sureuncertainty]

at least now i've gone through an important tumblr rite of passage, watching a longtime mutual become a radfem :/

[nonokoko13]

<<DNI if you shame people for having "cringe" interests>> *proceeds to shame or disrespect someone for having interest in fictional stuff they don't like instead of using the block button even though that person has done anything to anyone*

[moe-broey]

Hmmmm.....

[eggmeralda]

I hate having romantic feelings this is horrendous I wanna go back to being fully aromantic

[thornshadowwolf]

DAN AND PHIL RETURN????????

[startreatment]

.

[artekai]

It'd be nice not to feel like shit literally every night right before going to bed :(

[mooodyblue]

ignore me lol

[benjimarii]

Man, the Ben 10 Tumblr fandom has such weird takes sometimes-

It's hard to like... Understand frames of mind for some people. Did we watch the same series?? Maybe you got things out of it that I missed? I'm just so confused.

I don't doubt that their intentions are good, as the series itself has it's issues. But there's just some nitpicks I don't understand. Maybe I just don't get if people are joking or not?

Do the people who watch the show and are in the Tumblr part of the fandom not like the show? Is it a Danny phantom situation? To a smaller degree of course, but still. I mean, I enjoyed each iteration of the show, flaws and all. It's a good series 🤔 A lot of people I come across enjoy the series as well, so the nitpicks seems to mostly be a Tumblr thing.

Nitpicks and criticism aren't the same thing btw. I understand and agree that most forms of media can and should be criticized to better understand it. You can criticize something and be absolutely infatuated with it, that's where Ben 10 stands for me.

Idk, maybe I'm just looking too deep into things. 🤷

Also, please don't take this the wrong way, as I'm just curious and want to learn more about how other people view the series. Different options absolutely matter, and often help people see new light on subject manners that are in the show. Sorry if I appear hostile or anything, as it's not my intent.

[mrfoox]

Talking with Fabian and whooooooooo boy that was an conversation and a half...

[ukulelegodparent]

ok yeah maybe I am just a very petty little bitch so what?