#idk maybe i saw it less back then bc i was in the fandom

[comas-are-for-sleeping]

wait also NOTE: i fucking LOVE that there is such a growing group of rep now, like u said podcasts (i.e. tma the beloved??? or at least the fandom idk??? where did the poc fanart come from like is that canon is it hcs) and like COMICS (like squire and the well etc!!!) and just. SO many things dude!!!! and los espookys as well!!!! it's just so cool that there are so many things now

Yes!!! Things are happening I am so excited for the future!!!

Steven Universe trailblazer? hmm

[acerikus]

G o d. All gekkos' outertale posting makes me wanna talk more in depth about the characterisation and plot issues in this game and why they bother me...

(readmore bc holy fuck this got long, it's probably like 5k words. It's also pretty much all salt, categorised by character)

Toriel

Why. Why is she like this. Kinda feels like the creator of the game hates her and if they don't, they have a weird way of showing it. She's treated as overdramatic and unjustified in her anger at asgore despite the fact that he DID declare war on humanity and he DID willingly let the people believe he was killing human children to harvest their souls. Even if he didn't do it for real in this game, she has every right to be angry and to not trust him, and it CERTAINLY doesn't make her undeserving to be a mother or whatever. Idk about you, but I don't think wanting kids to stay away from a man yelling about wanting to kill every child that crosses him makes you a bad parent, even if it turns out he didn't really hurt anyone y'know?

They also REALLY zoned in on 'mother' with her in a way that doesn't really make sense here. I could maybe see her feeling guilty for making a snap judgement but how would that call her motherhood into question?

Sans saying isolation messed with her makes no sense too!!!! The outerlands or whatever they called the ruins isn't sealed off in this game, other monsters seem way less intimidated by her in this game than in undertale (she has friends! She knows sans by name and goes to napstablook's shows and even has their phone number!), and we outright get told she takes the taxi to get her groceries... Meaning she headed off to the rest of the outpost and probably does that often enough.

All things considered, Toriel seems fairly well adjusted in outertale, at least by outertale standards. Kinda then makes it feel like everyone's just trying to convince her she's hysterical and that... Sucks.

Also the fact that they added an ending where you stay with her and framed it as a bad ending that doomed everyone is... Really mean? It sucked ass I'm sorry :/

Sans

... Why is he like this. This take on Sans is absolutely infuriating tbh. The only positive I really have here is that his puns are kinda good, I've seen fangames that fuck up this element massively and it was kinda fun to see his interactions in starton.

Okay, back to salt. His whole 'i became a sentry to help humans' thing is trash. He didn't care about that in ut! He didn't care about that at all! The only reason he looks out for frisk is because he made a promise to toriel, and he hates breaking promises. He didn't want to let down his friend.

...Huh. realising this is yet another case of Toriel disrespect somehow. Yet another thing they took from her, that they then just... Handed over to sans instead. :/

His lack of backstory. Look, I get wanting something silly, but they took almost everything that makes sans interesting away. Not hyperfocusing on sans like certain aus do is nice, but it feels like in a lot of situations in this game they overcompensated by a long shot.

No mysterious past/origins. We know he worked with alphys I guess but???? Honestly I have a LOT to rant about for that part so I'll leave it for twinkly's section. And yet despite all this, Sans inexplicably bleeds in tpe when not even undertale has that happen? Make up your mind!

His role in non Asriel chaotic also... Sucks ass. I'm in a pretty awesome corner of the fandom in terms of the people I follow and the takes I see as a result, so if I'm honest, when I saw all those posts about 2024 fanon sans being indifferent to his brother's murder, I kinda just figured they were vaguing about this game. You're telling me that sans of all people just shrugs off you killing everyone and complains a little bit before letting you pass?! He should know alphys already ran off. He should know the only person left to stop you is asgore, and that it's obvious he won't. Part of this could be connected to how frisk is written perhaps, and much like the twinkly situation, I'll have much more to say on that further down.

I understand the creator didn't wanna have a sans fight in their game - however, if that's the case... Maybe come up with a reason for him to NOT show up in the last corridor, then? Have him busy helping with evacuations or something, or already dead like in the first chaotic ending... This was just sloppy.

Papyrus

Honestly he wasn't... Terrible. The phonecalls were fun even if most were cheap references (though they can be fun in fangames sometimes so I'm not mad at this lol). Him being extremely talented at making spaghetti is just one symptom of one of this game's biggest flaws, however. I really don't like how nobody's really allowed to be bad at anything or have any real struggles in this game - especially when spaghetti in undertale is used to demonstrate his relationship with undyne and the similar wavelength they're on when humans aren't involved. She's the one who started teaching him to cook it, it's deeply intertwined with his desire to be a royal guard, and it's something they suck at together. Him just inexplicably being good at it is... Weird, and feels really disconnected from their friendship and her reluctance to let him in the guard yknow?

Also: his boss final phase. Having the dog NOT take his special attack away this time was really funny admittedly but... Idk? Not only is the fight really unfair for pacifist/neutral and those who aren't as good at the game (ut never gets this hard outside of geno), it feels way too on the nose in terms of insisting he's strong and has powerful attacks. Undertale didn't need to overcompensate to get across that papyrus is strong and disciplined and the way you have to infer that in undertale is way cooler. I might just be nitpicking with this point tbh but it's whatever. Letting myself be a hater for once.

And don't get me started on him getting together with Mettaton. It seemed to come out of absolutely nowhere, the idea that they were already friends in this was glossed over really quickly and no time was really put into developing the relationship save for papyrus commenting on finding him attractive every few minutes.

Gotta be honest, I've never been a fan of this ship nor understood its popularity. Papyrus very briefly mentions thinking he's attractive in undertale, but it doesn't really go anywhere and I'm not even sure mettaton knows he exists. It feels like it was just kinda added because it's a popular ship and that's it, not sure it really contributes much to either of their arcs. It was a light-hearted celebrity crush in canon and never really tried to be more.

Oh, oops. Had more to say here than I thought.

Undyne

Not much to say here... I think she was okay, there's nothing super bad with her. I do think the way gerson kinda downplays her/lacks faith in her in the chaotic route kinda sucks and I think choosing to make her non-undying chaotic bossfight harder sure was A Choice, but it's whatever. Undying was weirdly easy in a way that didn't do her much justice. Honestly they didn't do enough with her for me to have a wall of complaints and I can't tell if that's a good thing or not. Her relationship with alphys didn't really amount to much and her lack of understanding of human culture doesn't really hit as hard when she's just talking about random sci-fi things that we have no way of knowing are real or not in this game's idea of the 2600s ourselves, y'know? Her love of anime (that she mistakenly thinks is human history) is pretty absent here except to validate her relationship with alphys in a very shallow way.

The Ghost Family

Hoo boy... Was gonna make this the mettaton section, but I wanted to talk about napstablook at the same time, so I'm just gonna lump them all together.

What. What the hell was this plotline.

It feels like they tried to go for 'smalltime farmer chases passion for stardom after feeling unfulfilled at home' and as I've seen someone else say, 'shy business owner struggles to talk to their cousin outside of work'. This would've been fine tbh, but... There's a lot of things in the execution of this that kinda grossed me out if I'm honest. I don't think they were intentional, but I think it could've been thought through a lot better to avoid some unfortunate implications - or even lean into them in a respectful way.

Firstly, the ghost family intervention was pretty long, awkward, and didn't feel like it really added much - especially when most people playing would already know mettaton's backstory anyway (and his house is still accessible like in undertale!!!!! What was the point?)

Mettaton airing out his family issues on live TV feels very ooc - he keeps that stuff very close to his chest and I doubt he'd like it getting out. Him entertaining any of that out in the open seems... Weird.

Speaking of the intervention, his cousins' treatment of him was horrifying! Part of it seems intentional and it's nice that there's at least one part in the game where characters are allowed to have flaws and do bad things but... There's also elements that feel like you're meant to agree with them? Their insistence that mettaton just come home and everything they did in the past with constantly badgering him to come and help out on the farm were rightfully treated as something that hurt mettaton's feelings and that gave napstablook and the others pause. That's (mostly, we'll come back to it later) fine. He called them out for it and they reflected on it, cool. The way his ghost form was utilised makes me extremely uncomfortable, however.

Napstablook talks about hearing 'the real [mettaton]' in the recording, right to his face, 'the real mettaton' in this scenario alluding to his ghost form. Considering mettaton is a trans allegory, this feels... Kinda gross? In a similar vein, when passing mettaton's quiz barriers, one of the questions is 'what is mettaton's true identity' and you have the option to deadname him (using a name papyrus literally just made up in undertale rather than having any kind of creativity ofc) Alphys' reaction is simply to ask how you know that which... Doesn't feel great. The correct answer is 'mettaton' ofc thankfully, but everything around this particular plot point feels weird. Maybe don't do that w the most prevalent trans allegory character..?

And ofc, they keep insisting he just come home, go back to working on the farm, go back to his family... Idk, gives me vibes of someone abandoning their shitty transphobic family and then insisting they want to see 'the real [deadname] again' and for them to abandon their new life and just go back to the way things were before. Not good.

All of this would still be okay for the most part since the ghost family are painted as being unfair to mettaton... But in true pacifist, he goes back to helping out with the farm anyway and talks about how he thinks he was probably just being dramatic after all, and how 'blooky didn't do anything that bad'

... What?

It takes me right back to Toriel's treatment. Napstablook, Maddie and lurksalot gave no real thought to mettaton's feelings, made it all about them and showed pretty much no support for his transition nor his career! Fuck those guys! It's funny - mettaton is pretty consistently a pompous asshole (affectionate) in undertale but here, I think all his feelings towards his family were COMPLETELY valid. Mettaton outertale didn't do anything wrong.

Lurksalot didn't feel like they contributed much to the story either, save to be yet another character treating mettaton like shit with zero consequences nor narrative judgement. They just made every ghost family event even more drawn out.

And then ofc!!!! Mettaton and Alphys' friendship is so bland in this game! They're two people who kinda know each other and she says some nice things about him in a letter in chaotic but that's about it. Their friendship and the subsequent conflict frisk's arrival brings to it in undertale is the heart of hotland and the core, but here it's just replaced with unnecessary, hard to watch, boring family drama. The two of them have no issues to work out. She doesn't ask too much of him. There's no funny quips and barely any chemistry at all. God forbid either of them have any real flaws.

One last thing: I'm glad maddie gets her mew mew body, it's nice. Wish it was an on-screen moment or something alluded to more though. Some of that time dragging out the family drama could've been used on that instead, y'know? Especially with napstablook getting the mew mew doll... Genuinely thought they were gonna show it to her when they first got hold of it, rather than dragging Frisk into their intervention. She should've gotten to be more mad, too. Kinda a big part of her identity.

Oh, and mettaton's no-asriel chaotic fight was bullshit. It was a nice spamton reference and the first phase was cool, but the second was utter bullshit and dragged out the fight way too long. Attacking him after snapping all the wires should've killed him im sorry. It's even more of a shame bc I genuinely really liked this game's mettaton neo fight - it was fun and creative and felt possible.

Holding myself back from adding any more to this bc I could go on and on, ugh.

Alphys

Alphys. For a game that tries to make her the star of it, it's actually kinda impressive how much they managed to take away from her and just how uninteresting she is in this game.

At the surface level she's awesome, powerful, and the star of the show. In my first playthrough I was actually pretty happy to see her thriving like this! The more routes I played and the more I thought about it though they just kinda... Declawed her. Took away all her flaws. Made her 'perfect' in a way that I don't think works at all.

The amalgamates never happened. None of her experiments went wrong. She never hid away from her mistakes, or lied to anyone (save for keeping Asgore's secret, which she has no negative feelings about), nor did she over engineer any situations to make herself seem cooler. She doesn't argue with Mettaton! She's confident and assertive! She's Asgore's right hand woman and next in line for the throne! And ofc, the badass final boss! What's not to love?

...But none of this is Alphys, is it?

Her anxiety isnt just because of the determination experiments, it's pretty clear she's always been a pretty shy and nervous person. In fact, based on her entries they were one of the things she was more confident in before it all went wrong. People are hard, but she knows science, y'know?

She doesn't get to be flawed or interesting - despite her presence, she's just a generic cool scientist who's suave with the ladies, I guess..?

She isn't particularly dorky, shes overly confident, she has zero issues to work through. Her relationship with undyne is perfect (derogatory) and her infodumping about anime just before the archive feels very forced, like they remembered last minute that she does that and thought it should be included somehow.

Depicting what she'd be like in a scenario where the determination experiments never happened is a fun and interesting idea! But deltarune demonstrates how to do that well, and I think they completely missed the mark. The way she talks, her body language, the way she acts around others in general... These things are universal constants and yet in outertale, she's basically a different person entirely.

Outertale alphys isn't allowed to lie (save to cover for asgore Secretly Being A Good Person), she isn't allowed to miscalculate, she isn't allowed to mis-speak or make mistakes or do anything she'd regret. She feels like an alphys written by someone who hates her in canon and thinks all her flaws make her terrible and unlikable. I doubt this is the case since I don't think a person like that would've given her such prevalence, but that's the level of love and attention I feel was given to her writing here. It makes me sad.

And, of course... The DT experiments and her fight.

... Why did she have vials of determination if all the humans are alive? Did she take it from them? If so, was this before or after they went into stasis? We know she's not been the royal scientist for long in relation to how long humans have been falling, so did ROMAN take the determination? How much of this did she even DO?

Why did she and sans even DO anything with determination? It... Doesn't really make sense.

Speaking of determination, why did she melt at the end of her fight? I'd assume she's injected herself with determination as one of the vials in her lab is mentioned to be partially used, but I'm pretty sure it's also like this on pacifist. Was that overlooked? Are we just meant to assume it's MORE depleted? Does she just have natural determination now because She's So Cool And Badass? This isn't even really a complaint about the fight, more just how poorly that part of her lab is handled lmao

But getting into her fight... Idk, it didn't really feel like her. A lot of it was just random bullshit that was hard for the sake of being hard, that didn't really seem to be tied to her identity very well at all. People complain a lot about the Zenith Martlet fight in undertale yellow but that's done far better than this, imo. It clearly reflects martlet's character, personality and canonical bullet patterns (we see Alphys' in ut tpe!), there's a genuine feeling of progression in the fight and the act you're given to help with the fight feels more effective - you can still damage her on her turn, so taking a turn to heal act doesn't feel like a waste. The Asriel acts though... They just don't last long enough to feel that worth it? Sure they're okay, but in general, you get a lot less time to breathe. Martlet's fight lets you retry from phase 2 if you die. Sans' in undertale gives you as many turns as you need to heal while he's sparing you. Alphys' fight just feels like it's made to feel un-fun and painful throughout in a way that just isn't worth it, and doesn't really feel like it fits her personality either, y'know? The fight was just a slog and like many others, I had zero motivation to finish it legit. I don't think it helps that the undyne and mettaton fights in this route are fairly easy and simple in comparison.

Tldr: they took away everything that makes alphys endearing, fun and interesting. This isn't alphys at all.

Asgore

A huge chunk of this essay accidentally got deleted, including my first attempt at writing this section. In it, I mentioned that the Asgore apologism went way too far.

This time though, I don't think I'd even call it that. Reflecting on it, it feels less like an attempt to defend him and more like a way to hate on and spite Toriel.

Seriously. So much of his character basically just feels like someone going 'fuck you toriel. I'm giving EVERYTHING to asgore.'

It's... Really weird?

Asgore having a way out of killing humans is an interesting concept! Outertale takes place 500 years in the future compared to undertale, so the idea that they have the resources and technology to do that is kinda cool and in theory, exploring this idea sounds really fun. In practice though, it feels like it was mostly done to make Toriel out to be an asshole for no reason and to laugh at her for ever assuming he would've really killed anyone (despite... Y'know. Telling everyone that's what he was doing.)

He just. Completely moved on from Toriel without a second thought seemingly, and doesn't even look that affected by seeing her turn up again - meanwhile SHE'S got crumpled up tea recipes in the trash and all the Sad Divorced Energy - it doesn't really fit either of them! Toriel wasn't really given a reason to miss him like that, and I think even if he DID fully move on, he'd be way happier to see her than that.

All his leading statements on how she must feel in LV1 pacifist sucked ass also, especially with the way she kinda just agreed that yeah, she feels like shit for not trusting that he'd suddenly do a 180 and not hurt anyone (AGAIN. AFTER HE CONTINUED TO LET EVERYONE BELIEVE THIS) and that she must feel unworthy of being a mother. She hadn't even said half of this in front of him yet! He put words in her mouth! That in itself would be fine (social blunders are pretty normal for asgore after all) but it... Wasn't treated like that. It was handled as if this was a sweet and compassionate thing for him to say which... Yikes.

And ofc he gets to adopt frisk, and monster kid, and get to have Asriel live with him! His fatherhood is never called to question in undertale, but ofc Toriel's motherhood has to be here. Hell, despite their divorced status, if you talk to gerson in tpe it's highly implied frisk asks if asgore would start aging again if he became their dad! Idk, all of this part just reeked of Toriel hate and nothing more. Asgore is just yet another character to get sanded down and de-clawed and it sucks. So much of what makes him interesting is his mistakes and flaws and how they impact him, y'know?

Twinkly

I wanna start this by saying I don't think his writing is too bad. It's not amazing by any means but by outertale standards, he's one of the better written characters. That being said, Flowey is my favourite character of all time so I'm still gonna be critical.

So they did save the goat. Save the goat aus really aren't my thing nowadays - I feel like so often people act like he's a separate person to Flowey entirely and act like the alarm clock app dialogue doesn't exist. Asriel didn't end the story as a doomed tragedy fated to fade away! Flowey ended the story as someone who finally got closure on the loss of his best friend, and can finally learn to move on, even if it takes him a while to adjust. I don't think he needs to be a goat again for that.

That being said, I know these kinda aus are a big wish fulfilment thing for a lot of the fandom that aren't even necessarily something people want to be canon as much as they just wanna explore the idea and see him truly happy, so I won't judge that element too harshly. People are allowed to have fun, and I think save the goat can be fine if it respects him as flowey rather than separating them.

I really like that they allow Asriel to be fucked up and an asshole rather than him soft rebooting into some Sweet Perfect Little Prince once he returns to his old form, like so many other save the goat takes. Even in lv0's ending he struggles to bite back insults and mean comments aimed at Monster Kid which is... Admittedly kinda refreshing! There's definitely some flowey (or I guess in this case, twinkly) behaviour that still comes through here and I'm glad. This carried over to chaotic, too. While his characterisation wasn't perfect, this at least felt like twinkly obtaining a few form and continuing to play with the world, rather than your standard Asriel take. I also really liked that he remembers and acknowledges chaotic if done before pacifist, that was neat and adds to his character (as far as this game goes) I think.

However, onto the biggest, glaring issue I have with him.

Why. Why does he exist.

No, seriously.

In its attempt to make the world perfect, a world that blatantly only exists so the creator could make a save the goat ending, mind, there's no reason for the goat to need to be saved at all. Nor for him to exist after dying back when Chara lived with the dreemurrs.

Asgore isn't killing humans, so the souls don't need to be absorbed by anyone. Frisk can just enter the archive and lend their power to destroy the forcefield themselves, so there's no ultimatum like there is in undertale - there's no implied tradeoff of Frisk's life for the freedom of monsters without twinkly's intervention. In undertale, flowey's messing around opened up an ending that would've otherwise been impossible, something that worked for everyone.

Without him existing at all here, frisk could've broken the barrier just fine. All it really added to pacifist was a couple extra boss fights and asgore being dead for two minutes. And him being saved I guess but again, there's no real story justification for him being here EXCEPT to pat yourself on the back for saving him.

Why was he created? In undertale it's pretty clear - they wanted a vessel to hold all the souls in for now during the true lab experiments. He exists because Alphys selected the first flower to ever grow in the garden and injected it with determination that she extracted from the human souls.

... But all the humans are... Alive and well in outertale? They don't need a vessel to contain their souls. They don't need to extract any determination from anyone. Again, why do they HAVE vials of determination? And why did she inject one into a flower?

AND THAT'S THE OTHER BIG THING. It's established she and sans injected a starling flower for... Whatever reason. SO WHY THE HELL IS TWINKLY A CARTOON STAR?!

This point makes absolutely no sense at all. He looks absolutely nothing like a starling flower nor does he behave like a flower at all, which is confusing if that's what he started as. Honestly, I think it would've made more sense to just keep him as Flowey if they were gonna include him at all, and just have his appearance reflect a starling flower instead of a golden flower.

This applies to his fight too. Mechanically I think it's AWESOME, but the visuals are... Just very very boring. A huge part of why his fight in the original is so good it's the bizarre and chaotic nature of it, the horror elements, and the way so much of flowey's trauma in terms of how he was created and the things he finds scary was put on blast for all to see. The combination of mechanical and organic elements, all the plants and insects... Idk, just going 'hmm he's a star. Let's have him go through a star life cycle' is boring, there's no visual appeal.

If his creation is so vague and wishy washy, this would've been a great opportunity to flesh it out more. How was he created? What kinds of technology and machinery did alphys use to put all this together? How did she (or roman????? unclear) get the determination? What does twinkly remember?

That leads me onto a tangentially related topic - his trauma. I... Don't think this was shown very well. He talks a bit about BEING traumatised from the lab, but telling isn't the same as showing and canon flowey is terrible at hiding it, whereas I'd just as easily believe outertale Asriel made it up for sympathy points. He never really projects, he doesn't force anyone else to experience anything like he did, nothing like that. He's just a cocky asshole who likes killing, and who eventually decides to start being nice.

This game constantly seemed to be speedrunning ways to get him from being twinkly to being Asriel as quickly as possible in almost every single route which... Huh???? It's weird. Would've been nice to let him be a star more rather than just Asriel...

(final amendment bc I lost a huge chunk of this essay originally and had to rewrite it, and I'm realising I didn't manage to fit this in this time... How does a single monster soul let him get his Asriel form again? Sure he's still treated as if soulless and it doesn't make him a good person, but if he was 'so tired of being a star', why hadn't he tried doing this sooner? It makes no sense...)

For a game that exists to give him a good ending, it's so ironic how little he needs to exist at all in this world. Just goes to show what it looks like when you go too far with 'fixing' things or removing stuff you seem 'too problematic' for the sake of being wholesome or whatever.

Chara

Speaking of which... Look I'm just gonna say it. This version of Chara sucks so bad.

Chara is one of my favourite characters - they're really interesting, morally grey, and a fascinating way for undertale as a game to interface with us as players.

They're a child who likely saw the worst of humanity, then found themselves in a home with family who genuinely loved them once they fell down and met the monsters. Their intense saviour complex made them feel like the best way to help their family was to sacrifice their own life to get enough souls to break them free (and once they realised they had control, get payback against the humans while they were at it). They could be mean-spirited and a prankster. They valued efficiency HIGHLY. Their favourite number was nine because it's the limit, the absolute, a way to stop hurting and to stop others hurting.

And by doing geno, you can push this fixation on stats further. Max out all your stats. Gain power. Get stronger. Become invincible. Nobody can hurt any more if the world is gone. And ofc, they stand as the final arbiter of consequences for the player. Your punishment for killing everyone and for pushing them into believing it needs to be completed. Chara both IS is and is separate from us in a way that can't really be fully disentangled and it's really, really cool.

Anyway, enough gushing about undertale Chara. What's outertale Chara in comparison?

... Nothing.

They're nothing.

Outertale Chara narrates occasionally. They're a ghost that follows frisk around, but aren't confined to that, and have been actively wandering the underground since their death. They also still have a SOUL for some reason? This part doesn't really make sense at all.

Other than sacrificing themself and maybe wanting to take out a few humans after Asriel absorbs them, they don't do anything that could be considered bad ever. The most devious thing they ever do is snatch Asriel's diary to leave a silly comment in there when they first arrive at the outpost (sans does this with Toriel's phone in undertale tpe for comparison lmao). Despite what Asriel seems to believe, Chara is completely absent from the chaotic route - never getting corrupted, never caring about our stats, never wanting to hurt anyone, never even trying to make us face any consequences. They're just... Not here. For a character so prevalent in the murder based route of undertale this is fucking wild.

They all but vanish if you so much as say something slightly mean to someone, too! It's strange, makes no sense, and just like with sans, it feels like they overcompensated waaaaaaay too much for the people who insist they're evil. On top of that, if you do chaotic before lv0, they don't even remember chaotic happening! They'd may as well have just been a member of the ghost family who likes following Frisk around when they're especially nice. Like Asgore and alphys, they've been sanded down and de-clawed to be 'wholesome' and 'perfect', and it just results in a bland, boring character who loses anything that made them interesting, nuanced and fun.

'Chara wasn't the greatest person'... Why, though? They don't have enough substance in this game for that line to really have as much impact.

Frisk

I'm gonna be honest - I actually ADORED their frisk at first, and I think that's because I started with a neutral run and ended up drawing them a lot. They felt silly and mischievous and interesting, and this continued into chaotic. They seem pretty chill with what's going on but then take that even further by being hilariously affectionate with Asriel and still doing silly things like being up for picking up the electrodampening fluid or drinking directly out of the fountain. They felt like a funny little mini-kris (save for being okay with all the murder ofc).

Then uhhhhhhh... That's when I experienced the second chaotic ending, the one without Asriel, as well as lv0. I feel like they definitely DID try to lean on the Kris angle on purpose in terms of their feelings on being controlled and stuff but it???? Just doesn't work very well? There's no ambiguity to this version of frisk once you've seen all the routes. Just like EVERYONE ELSE, they're just a perfect little angel who would never do anything wrong and anything past lv0 is just the eeeeeevil player influence or whatever. Come on, we have deltarune for that kinda approach to control 😭 (though even then, Kris is a layered and interesting character who isn't goodness and innocence personalised, and that's why they're cool)

In undertale, we have no idea what frisk is like as a person. WOULD they spare everyone without our influence? Would they kill? Would they be a scared child lashing out in self defense? Would they run from everything, then give up and let themselves die permanently somewhere? We just don't know! We're not supposed to know! It feels like it went back to the very early fandom interpretation where frisk is Good And Sweet and Innocent while Chara is evil incarnate - except this time they're BOTH the former.

It's a contradiction too! Why in the Asriel chaotic route are they so down to follow him, and pet him, and hug him every chance they get if they don't like all the stuff we're making them so? The player has no influence over Twinkly. Every single thing he did, he chose to do, and yet even if the only time frisk has seen him was him destroying their mercy button and forcing them to kill for him, they seem to love him to pieces and go along with whatever he says happily. What.

I feel like they didn't know what to do with Frisk here at all and it shows.

Other characters

This has been ridiculously long, but to quickly go over non-major characters... They did very few things to make Roman seem interesting, the amount of stuff hes implied to have helped Asgore with just reduces even further any influence or impact alphys had, and (a smaller nitpick)... Why didn't he use times new roman as a font when we DID see him speak in the archive/on the signal stars? It's such a missed opportunity...

Burgerpants was fun... Kinda. Developing him like this feels like something that should've happened DURING the actual game rather than before it though because it made him feel like a whole other person entirely? The poisoned food was very funny though.

Why is Snowy now Stardrake when his dad hasn't changed at all and Crystal looks like any other snowdrake? That was bizarre.

I actually really liked the humans! Establishing them as actual characters was really fun, and I especially like justice. Justice, at least in my opinion, is probably the most interesting character in this whole game tbh - someone who tried to do good but ultimately caused more harm than good, while NOT downplaying it, showing the consequences directly, and showing them work to try to make things better. The way we don't grab their item like the others in the twinkly fight nor go through an area for them in the archive (and just talk to them instead) really adds to their intrigue - what are they like? Who did they know? Is there something they don't want us to see? How are they strong enough to not need us to grab their weapon at all to lend their help? I think it's get funny that the only character I'm fully praising is the clover-adjacent one. Justice outertale they could never make me hate you

(that being said... seeing the way this game is clearly just supposed to be a 'fix' for undertale does sour my thoughts on the humans a little. did they only do this bc they thought them NOT being full characters in ut was bad/a problem with it? 🥴 This applies to the additional monster kid story focus too).

Speaking of monster kid... Them being an orphan was clearly just a plot device to give asgore more kids and therefore feel like he won more than Toriel. Monster kid in undertale seems like they probably did have real and loving parents, and they have a sister too!!!! Would've been nice if they'd at least done something with their sister :(

This got... Way longer than I expected, so I'll stop here. But outertale definitely gave me an even bigger appreciation for other ut fangames. My gripes with deltatraveler section 3 feel much smaller in comparison now, if tsus misses the mark on Flowey later down the line they've at least already done most characters so much more justice, and it really puts into perspective all the heart and soul that went into kissy cutie, as well as its genuine love got the source material and characters.

Sorry outertale, you weren't for me. That being said, if anyone disagrees with any of this then that's fine! These are all just my opinions and feelings on it after going through all the routes and talking about it with friends. Media is always gonna resonate with different people in different ways and that's a good thing! If your perspective on any of this is different and if you had way more fun with it, I'm glad you did and I genuinely wish I could've felt the same. I feel like at the very least, making it has probably been a great learning experience for the devs and I really hope they carry on making games and improving their skills. Hope y'all are thriving and having fun regardless 💙

[manicpixiedckgirl]

i get why a lot of ppl have 'minors dni' in their blogs, I rly do. but, idk man. i remember being a kid, on the internet, on this website.

boy, i was fucking lonely back then.

and to deal with that, i made a bunch of friends online bc I rly didn't know how to in person, and some of those friends were adults.

and those adults taught me a lot - they taught me about the music they liked and the places they lived and about how other families worked (outside of my very neglectful home), how relationships can be different to the ones I saw my peers in. bc of them i learned about world religions, and politics, and bad movies (sorry napeleon dynamite fans).

and they kept me company while I was a kid in a bad place with no outlets but a computer. without their influence on my life id be a less interesting adult, but id have also been a much, much sadder child.

so like, don't get me wrong, I get it. you're not obligated to interact with anybody here, and if you're running a nsfw space, of course kids shouldn't be hanging around there. and kids can be a lot! im not asking anyone to go out and run an online daycare for social media addicted teens, or heaven forbid, do "emotional labor". but remember that you were a kid online too once, and maybe next time you see a ludicrous post from a 14 yo, let it go.

and i hope that if you're u18 and you see this post, you know there's nothing wrong with (safely) talking to adults online. people of all ages have always shared these spaces - on forums, in fandom, and now on social media. the idea that we wouldn't is actually pretty new, especially for queer people, where interacting with older queer people was often the only way to learn about yourself. in general, you could learn a lot from talking with people older than you - and honestly, we can probably learn a lot from you too.

[lesbiancarat]

so i saw a tiktok where someone was talking about fandom colors and their video was mostly reflecting on 3rd gen, but they made a comment that they weren't sure if fandom colors were a thing for 4th gen anymore. and i was kind of like huh, now that i think about it, idk if i've heard of 4th gen groups having fandom colors either, so i went to kprofiles about it

and i just clicked on the profiles of a few bg's and gg's each so it's not like i can speak in absolutes here, but i did look at all of what i consider the top/most active groups bc i felt like they would be a good representation of the trends of 4th gen. and interestingly, none of the boygroups i looked at had fandom colors listed, while most of the girl groups i looked at did

and maybe i'm analyzing it too much, but i always felt like fandom colors played a big role in defining a group's brand and identity. because if you look at some of the most popular 3rd gen groups and their fandom colors we have (forgive me that i'm not going to get the exact color names right, i know they have specific names, but part of the point i'm trying to drive home is that these colors are recognizable even by non-fans):

nct with a neon green. gives of modern, experimental vibes, which also describes their music perfectly. just like their music, it's out there, it's loud, not everyone likes it, but for those that do, it's super fun. none of this is an insult, it's perfect marketing for them imo

twice with peach and pink. it's very girly and fun, again, like their music. it's not a hot pink that might be associated with more sexy concepts, it's softer, which fits the cutesy-ness of their music

seventeen with rose quartz & serenity. also pretty soft and cutesy, again, it fits their early concept of boyish and bright songs

blackpink with, well, black and pink (not sure if this is technically official, but like, c'mon). pink, again, very heavily associated with girliness/femininity, while the black brings some edginess to it, which also perfectly fits their brand

and like, i know some of the explanations i'm giving may sound stereotypical (pink is a girl color, etc.), but like it or not, as a society, we do associate certain things with certain colors, and that's the reason these color choices can work so well for branding. (and i'm not saying those expectations can't or shouldn't be subverted, just that, when it come to things like gg's and the color pink, we know it's not a coincidence)

but anyway, going back to my point of fandom colors helping to define a group's brand/identity. i wonder if the reason 4th gen boy groups don't seem to have fandom colors is because they don't have as set of a brand or concept as it were? and i want to disclaim that i don't say this to be like "4th gen bg's bad :(" bc personally i enjoy a good number of 4th gen bg songs, and i do think 4th gen bg's are worthy of having fans. anything that may sound like criticism is more directed at general trends and how companies are choosing to market their groups. but i'm also going to avoid listing specific groups so no one feels like they're being attacked lol

(also want to disclaim that i'm talking purely about title tracks here, i think in general bsides are inherently less important to overall branding and allow for more exploration so i'm not taking that into consideration)

honestly i can think of a few 4th gen bg's that have a very distinct and consistent sound, and those few also didn't have fandom colors listed, so maybe this argument doesn't hold water. but i feel like i've run into a lot of 4th gen bg's that completely change their sound every comeback. and i don't think this is inherently a bad thing, but i do think it is harder to, from a marketing standpoint, acquire a lot of casual listeners. you might get them interested in one song, but if they don't get that same sound they like for the next song, and they're not invested in the members, what's to keep them interested? but they can still keep afloat if they have enough dedicated stans that will listen to whatever the group puts out

so you end up with a bunch of groups that have no solid identity in terms of like, a distinct, recognizable sound or visual brand. and i think, ironically, this is why for the casual listener, a lot of 4th gen bg's can start to run together, which is why you get a lot of people complaining that "all 4th gen bg's sound the same". which is obviously subjective and not something everyone agrees with, but i think it does stem from more than just 2nd and 3rd gen stans not liking change. i genuinely think there's been a big marketing failure when it comes to 4th gen bg's

the reason i don't think this has been an issue for 4th gen gg's comes down to their audience compared to bg's. it's pretty much always been the case that gg's tend to be more popular with the general public and casual listeners, while bg's tend to have bigger and more dedicated fanbases than gg's (again, tendency, i'm not saying there aren't any dedicated gg stans or that bg's are never popular with the general public). because of this, bg's have always had more freedom to experiment with their music and their concepts, because they have dedicated fanbases that will support whatever they put out, even if they don't really like it. and, of course, because everything gg's do is seen under the lens of misogyny, and in general get harsher criticism than bg's do. so gg's on the whole kind of have to stick to a set brand and not experiment too much (or at all) in order to be successful

again, none of this is meant to criticize 4th gen bg's as a whole, and definitely not meant to criticize individual groups or their fans. ultimately there are a lot of people that stan these groups and enjoy their music, and as long as people are having fun, then it's fine. but i do think it's interesting to look at how the marketing trends have changed and how it might contribute to some of the criticisms we see of 4th gen bg's in particular. and obv i don't know everything that goes on in the kpop industry, so maybe i'm missing something obvious, but these are just some thoughts i had that i wanted to share :')

[mostlikelytofangirl]

For the salty asks list 5 and 18 pls

Hi anon! Thanks for the ask :D

5. Has fandom ever ruined a ship for you?

Oohhh boy, you are tossing me into the fire right away, I see. Ok I'm gonna get a lot of hate for this, but after enough encounters with nasty fans that would glorify wangxian and look down (if not bully) other fans that are in the fandom for anything other than them or liked the "wrong" characters, I fell out of love with the ship orz.

To be fair, I always liked other ships more simply bc of my personal preferences, but I liked wx enough. Yet the more I saw stuff like "why are you even in the fandom if not for them?" or "everybody who ever held a different oponion to them was a bad person", the less inclined I was to interact with the ship at all :/

But ehh, they are hella popular, they don't really need me lol

18. Does not shipping something 'popular' mean you're in denial and/or biased?

Tying in nicely with the previous one, huh. Well, personally, I think it just come back to personal preference. I definitely don't think it has to do with denial unless the ship is actually canon bc. Well. It's canon XD. But bias? Yeah. I'm biased in not shipping of popular things bc they don't spark joy, plain and simple. Maybe combining the characters with others does the trick to what I personally find more interesting in a ship, idk.

If anything, I don't see why it's even a deal in the first place. Just bc a ship is popular doesn't mean it's more real then other non-canon stuff, and even if it WAS canon... so what? It's not my moral duty to ship them if I simply don't find them entertaining enough, be it bc the author didn't do that good a job with them or just bc they are not characters I like individually in the first place, or their dynamics just don't work for me.

I'm here to give my brain the happy chemicals in whatever funky way I want, after all lol

[c0rpseductor]

saw ppl discussing this book called a little life on twitter bc apparently people are making tiktoks of themselves crying about this book & looked up the synopsis and like. i mean maybe in full it’s more profound and it’s like the experience of reading it that holds a more nuanced message, but simply reading a summary of the plotline it’s a bit challenging for me to not want to dismiss it as more or less a fairly intellectualized sort of trauma porn. actually, it’s especially difficult with some of the author’s comments.

i think like. i don’t want to make any sweeping statements about a novel i have not read and will not read, but it does kind of hit on something i’ve talked about here and still turn over in my mind a lot where like. i do feel like there is a sort of appetite for trauma and a voyeuristic tendency in many people, and within fiction this can be satisfied. i also think people tend to spare a great deal of sympathy and compassion for fictional survivors of extreme trauma that they don’t really have for the same demographic in real life. (fandom is particularly bad with this, in that there’s a really pervasive hunger for extremely traumatized characters, but real life survivors who try to speak about feeling hurt by these trends and behaviors get totally pilloried and mocked.)

i think that’s honestly part of why the whole thing bothers me. the amount of trauma the protagonist of this novel went through isn’t necessarily, like, impossible. real people can often suffer a great deal. and like, he’s fictional, so he’s not hurt by people being voyeuristic toward him. but with characters like this where their sole purpose is to suffer for the audience and steadily decline until their deaths, and everybody cries and it’s so sad and profound, it’s like. Why? Who does this really help? what message is this supposed to send, exactly? people with fucked up pasts can continue to live, actually, and as part of that demographic i’m actually a little sick of people making a big show of crying over depictions of this sort of suffering and then studiously ignoring when it’s happening right in front of them and when people they know in reality are trying to cope with the very same issues. you know? like i am getting kind of fucking bitter that people pat themselves on the back about like “oh poor astarion from bg3” “poor saki from emergence (ew, btw)” “poor jude from a little life” so on and so forth but then look at real life victims of severe violence and just feel disgust and discomfort and turn away or victim blame. it’s actually pretty transparent when people’s “sympathy” is more about propping up an internal sense of virtue than about any true concern that other people are suffering.

i guess it’s good that it has a lot of positive reception from critics and is specifically stated to be “not misery porn” but idk im starting to feel like maybe my definition of that term is different than other people’s just bc i really find the voyeurism exhausting and tend to despise anything with a huge audience of really blatant voyeurs. but maybe that’s not fair to the novel. Well, whatever

[korereapers]

Title: The special kind

Fandom: Pokémon

Pairing: Lt. Surge/Koga, toxicboltshipping

Rating: Explicit

Notes: idk if anyone remembers me or these toxicbolt fics. I'm gonna be uploading them here since... well I orphaned them on ao3 bc of reasons. And I did abandon my old tumblr account bc I wanted to leave some things behind.

So, this is an old fic. If you remember me, hi. The fic is under the cut

Sinnoh is a cold region. It reminds Surge of Unova in fall, or early winter. It’s not far from Johto, so it was a relatively short trip from home.

Perfect for some snuggling, if he says so himself.

They could have gone to Alola and sunbathe until Surge’s skin became the typical reddish pink that most Unovan tourists have. They could have traveled to Kalos, and enjoy the beautiful scenery, and delicious food. Koga had suggested Unova, and he had quickly rejected the idea. He isn’t ready to go back, not yet.

So, they ended up in cold, humid Sinnoh, where people are a little too quiet, but warm and welcoming. He has grown to like quiet, after what seemed like a lifetime of way too much noise.

Their hotel is in Sunyshore, because Surge loved the city as soon as he saw photos of it. Solar panels, a lively flea market, close to the sea… it reminds him of Vermillion, in a way. Apparently, the kid that runs the gym is even an electric type trainer, too. Surge wants to meet him, badly.

He feels a change in Koga’s breath as soon as they both enter their bedroom. He knows him, realises how his eyes look at him, not leaving him for many seconds but also trying not to look at him too much, probably worried about making him feel uncomfortable.

Surge smiles fondly, in anticipation, as he leaves the suitcase near the bed.

“What’s wrong, honey? Are you feeling cold?”

It’s unlikely that anyone’s cold inside of the building. Sunyshore is probably the warmest city in all Sinnoh, and their hotel has a working heater. Still, he knows that Koga needs a little of encouragement to ask for what he wants.

Surge looks at him, still smiling, and Koga smiles back, nervously.

“A little.”

Surge takes out his jacket, as if teasing him a little. As he opens his mouth, warmth fills his chest.

“Why not just cuddle with your amazing husband, then?”

Koga blushes a little, but Surge does not tease him about it. He is blushing, too. Maybe even more than Koga himself.

“I thought that you wanted to take a walk around the city. Have dinner outside.”

Surge is definitely having something sweet for dinner, alright. The thought makes him sigh softly.

“This is our honeymoon. You’re my husband, Koga. Sightseeing can wait.”

Koga’s frown gets a little deeper for a second, but his eyes look at him softly, way too softly. When he breathes deeply, Surge knows that his defenses are finally down. For the moment.

As they both lie down, Surge just pretends to hug his husband, casually. Keeping him close. Koga snorts a little when Surge kisses his temple, just where his hairline ends. Relaxed and receptive, that’s the way Surge likes him the most.

It doesn't take much teasing for Koga to just get impatient and kiss him. To kiss Surge like he has been dying to for who knows how long. Not that the feeling isn’t mutual.

“See? It was not hard.” Surge murmurs against Koga’s lips, and Koga just kisses him again.

“I apologize.” Koga says, sheepishly, dark eyes looking at Surge’s blue ones for a couple of seconds. Surge cups Koga’s face with one of his hands, feeling Koga’s skin getting warmer. He smiles, delighted.

He knows what Koga wants. He knows how he is looking at him, with both love and desire, not very efficiently contained behind a poker face. Surge knows better. Always has, always will. Still, he wants Koga to say it, out loud. To express himself, to be honest. So he asks, again and again.

“What do you want, Koga?”

And each time, the answer comes quicker, less bashful. More confident, and open. Sometimes, he doesn’t even have to ask, because Koga speaks up.

“You.” Koga says, breathing deeply, drowning in pure want. “I want you.”

Surge gets closer, still embracing him with one arm, his thumb caressing Koga’s cheek, and then his lips. He smiles faintly at the sight of the wedding ring, a simple one with no ornament, like Koga’s one. A symbol of what they have.

“You have me.”

As Koga’s breath hitches, Surge gets their faces closer, kissing him sweetly, sighing peacefully when Koga relaxes as they kiss.

“How do you want me?” Surge asks, his voice low, because he knows it’s hard for Koga to express himself if it’s not among whispers, sometimes.

“Inside me.” Koga murmurs, his lips quivering, but Surge hears him perfectly. “Please.”

Surge’s smile gets wider as he speaks, his body and heart starting to feel aflame.

“Can do.”

They get towels, just in case it all gets messy. There’s lube and condoms inside of the drawer, because of course there is. The staff knew that they were a couple on their honeymoon. And to be fair, he’s sure that both of them are feeling way too impatient to buy something themselves.

Koga’s hands are on him as soon as they’re both lying down again, embracing him and kissing him. Like he’s dying to feel him. Surge doesn’t like to keep him waiting.

“Aw, you want the hubby dick, don’tcha…” he teases, and smiles wide when Koga’s face gets redder.

“Of course I do.”

And it’s Surge’s time to get as red as a Voltorb. He was ready to deal with a grumpy Koga, not with a honest one. The honest one is way cuter, though.

“Not so cocky now, are we?”

Koga’s words go straight to his groin. He shudders a little, letting Koga get rid of his clothes, quickly reciprocating with Koga’s ones. Surge’s hands comfortably caress the skin underneath, feeling the discreet muscles on Koga’s torso.

“I have gotten a little chubbier, but you…” he says, admiring Koga’s patience, his dedication. His discipline, to train every single day. Surge himself exercises less often now that he doesn’t need as much structure to keep his brain grounded.

“I like it.” Koga admits fondly, a finger gently poking Surge’s stomach. “It means you are happy.”

“I am.” Surge says, in a whisper, and presses their lips together. Koga cups his face with one hand, keeping him close even after the kiss ends.

Surge swoons loudly, and Koga kisses him again, a smile on his lips.

“You’re happy, too.” Surge teases, Koga’s smile less bashful than usual.

“Happier than ever.”

“No worries, honey. I won’t tell the kid. She will get jealous if I do.”

Koga laughs as he buries his face in Surge’s neck, his warm breath making him tense instantly.

“Jealous? Of you? I do not think so. She loves you.”

Surge hums when he feels his husband’s familiar lips on his skin, kissing it as one of his hands presses down Surge’s stomach, impatient to touch him. Circling around his belly, making it burn with his touch.

Koga sucks on his skin almost at the same time he starts palming him, and then pumping him slowly, and Surge would reciprocate if he wasn’t too busy having the hots for his husband and his eagerness.

“Koga... “ he tries to remind him, his throat dry when he speaks. “If you keep doing that, I won’t last enough to…”

Koga stops, his breath uneasy with nervousness and embarrassment.

“But I have just started…”

“And I’m horny as balls.”

“Oh.”

And of course, Koga stops completely. He looks up at Surge, a little apologetic, but Surge just kisses his nose, something that never fails to make him smile.

“Let me get you ready for me, okay? It’ll be good.”

Koga nods, because he knows. They both know. Surge shudders in anticipation at the thought, and Koga sighs deeply. They both snort at the sight. Like idiots.

“Darling… you like me.”

“Of course I do. We are married.”

“Still…”

Koga half groans, half laughs. He likes the attention, even more than Surge himself does.

“Were you not going to use your fingers for something good?"

He can feel himself light up at the question.

Surge takes the lube bottle, carefully wetting his fingers with it. Koga’s eyes are on him, and he looks back, a smile on his face.

“It’s gonna feel cold, you know…”

“I know. Do not concern yourself.”

“Roger.”

They’re lying down, side to side. Koga embracing him, lips going in for a kiss. Surge encircles him with his arm, his hand going down on Koga’s back. Koga sighs when he touches him, and Surge smiles against his lips.

He touches him to help him relax. With his fingertips, his knuckles, without much pressure. Koga’s face is getting hotter, and Surge can feel something hard against his leg, but Koga’s muscles do indeed feel relaxed.

“Here we go, okay?”

“Okay.”

Koga’s breath hitches as Surge’s finger goes in. He quickly reassures Surge that it doesn’t hurt, that it’s fine. Surge still tries to go slow, just in case. He kisses Koga’s temple, trying to reassure him. Slowly helping him relax, helping him feel comfortable.

“You okay?”

Koga nods, and Surge can tell that he is trying to be patient, like himself. Still, distracting him a little from the sensation may or may not help. It doesn’t hurt to try.

“You know. I can’t believe the guy that is making such a cute expression is now my husband.”

Koga’s breath stops for a second, and he looks at Surge, face redder than a Slugma.

“What are you…”

“You’re cute.” Surge repeats, his finger moving a little quicker, curling inside of him, to the point that Koga is shuddering not even a second later. “And my husband.”

“Says… Says the man with the most adorable smile in the region. Who is also my husband.”

“Just the region?” Surge teases, and Koga chuckles breathlessly.

“Just add another finger, Surge.”

The aforementioned puts their foreheads together, his free hand tenderly caressing Koga’s cheek.

“Roger.”

It doesn’t hurt, Surge realises. Koga feels uncomfortable at first, but he is not in any pain. He is relaxed, he wants him, and lube is doing its job amazingly. He wants him, Surge allows himself to think, the thought tasting sweeter than honey, making him hot, even hotter than usual. He is just too excited, like Koga is, about being married, about their honeymoon. 

He sighs, completely mesmerized.

About a domestic life with their kid and their pokémon.

“Are you okay?” Koga asks, and Surge realises he must be making the most embarrassing face ever known to mankind.

“Better than ever.” he answers, testing Koga’s body with his fingers, which makes his husband moan softly.

“Your expression…” Koga tries to say, his voice wavering. “You are happy. I find it… I find it really cute.”

Surge smiles, fingers in a familiar posture, touching the way Koga likes it. He does moan this time, and Surge’s throat is dry, his chest burning with excitement.

“You’re the one who is cute here, hun.”

Koga breathes in deeply, his forehead a little sweaty.

“You… I want you.”

The cutest, indeed.

Surge warns him before getting his fingers out, slowly, cleaning his hand with a towel. He smiles gleefully for a second when he looks at the ring on his finger. He takes a condom, putting it on with ease.

He feels Koga’s eyes drilling through his skull, his breath faltering so much that Surge himself feels his own heartbeat getting more erratic. He raises his gaze, meeting Koga’s one.

He remembers that Koga’s eyes felt piercing, almost cold, when they first met. As they are, they are the warmest he has ever seen, looking at him, at his face, as he deserved all of this. All of this happiness, a family, a loving husband. As if he belonged with them, and not in the trenches.

“Are you alright?” Koga asks, getting closer, and Surge realises that his eyes feel a little wet.

“Yeah, yeah. My eyes are just sweating a little. With happiness.”

Koga smiles at him, and Surge realises that he has been smiling more often lately. That he smiles way more than when they met.

“Do you want to stop?” Koga’s voice sounds so concerned that he could actually die.

“No, no, honey, of course I don’t.” he assures him. “If anything, I am like this because of how much I want this. Of how much I want you.”

Koga’s hand touches his chest, sweetly ascending through his neck, and then his shaved nape. Surge accepts the kiss eagerly, hearing a bottle getting opened, and smiling knowingly even before Koga starts coating him with lube. He moans a little in the middle of the kiss, thrusting into Koga’s hand, slowly.

“Let me take care of this.” Koga asks, and Surge doesn’t really have any complaint.

It’s a good sight. Koga’s focused expression, brows furrowed, jaw a little tense. Sitting on Surge’s lap, slowly taking him in. Sweat on his forehead, cheeks a little flushed. Chest raising and falling a little quicker than usual. Dark eyes not leaving Surge’s face, even if it’s hard for him to keep eye contact.

“You… You’re doing amazing, darling. Amazing.”

Surge’s hand is on Koga’s waist, reassuring him at the same time as his words. Encouraging him. Koga’s cheeks get a little darker, and he stops moving for some seconds, taking his time to adjust to the sensation. Surge takes the opportunity to kiss him, to let him know how loved he is, without words.

Koga’s hands are on his shoulders, and Surge smiles, because he has always liked feeling Surge’s muscles. Koga leans on him, and slowly, he starts moving.

Arceus be damned, Surge wouldn’t actually mind dying like this. Warmth around him, Koga’s uneven breath against his lips, his hands trembling a little on Surge’s shoulders.

“Shit…” he says, in Unovan, and he clearly feels Koga’s smile.

“A foul mouth, I see…”

“I will never say that in front of the kid, I promise.”

Koga chuckles, his movements a little quicker, a little more confident. It doesn’t hurt, Surge realises. He helps him move with the hand on Koga’s waist, and they both moan at almost the same time when Koga’s whole body trembles, tensing around him.

“There?” he asks, even if the answer is pretty obvious. Koga nods, and moves again, and again. Surge feels his own muscles twitching, grunting against Koga’s lips. His free hand moves between them, stroking him gently, and Koga makes a lovingly desperate sound.

Not that Surge doesn’t understand the feeling.

“I… I am close.” Koga admits, stopping for a second to breathe. Surge kisses his nose, his lips, and then his cheek.

“Me too…”

That seems to brighten Koga’s mood even more, his pace still a little uneven, but so obviously eager that Surge would swoon visibly if he wasn’t so busy trying not to cream himself between desperate moans.

Surge’s hand is already a little wet, and Koga’s body tenses, his moans a little broken. He thrusts into Surge’s hand, unsure of how to move anymore, overstimulation taking over him. 

And then, it’s over.

Surge patiently waits, kissing his husband’s face as Koga comes, messier than usual, still not loud. His expression blissful, and tender. Overwhelmed, for some seconds, before starting moving again, determined to make Surge finish.

Surge doesn’t really feel like restraining himself anymore. He is loud when he comes, looking for Koga’s smiling lips to kiss them until nothing matters anymore. The kiss is deep, frantic, tender, like trying to find the air he craves in the other’s mouth.

Koga embraces him, still riding him, making Surge enjoy the ride to the very end. Surge touches his chest, instinctively, the last remains of pleasure making his thoughts muddled. He feels himself smiling groggily when he feels Koga’s heartbeat under his fingertips.

“Good?” he asks, when he finds his voice again.

“Good. You?”

“Better.” Surge answers, his chest swollen with fake pride. Koga rolls his eyes, and it’s obvious for Surge how much they don’t want to let the other go.

So of course, Surge has to take drastic measures.

“I’m gonna take a leak. I think you should, too.”

Koga snorts, before moving, wincing a little as he does.

“The pinnacle of romanticism.”

“Sorry, hun. I had to. Don’t divorce me, please.”

Koga’s face gets genuinely sad for a second, and Surge feels bad for even joking about it. But then, Koga just smiles at him.

“I would never… But do not test your luck. Just in case.”

“I know, I know.”

After everything is said and done, they lie together, Surge’s head on Koga’s chest, listening to his heartbeat. Koga’s fingers play with his hair, distractedly, in a comfortable silence. He is close to falling asleep when Koga speaks, his heartbeat quicker, and his words make Surge jolt awake in a second.

“I love you.” Koga admits, in a low voice, like telling him an ancient secret. It’s not their usual confession, Kantonian has that way with words as a language. It’s a different kind of love. Deeper. More serious. The “wanting to spend a whole life together” kind. A special kind of loving, that Surge has been dying to verbalize for who knows how long.

He doesn’t have to look at Koga to know that he is blushing deeply, and waiting for his answer. Patiently, because they both know how much they have wanted to say it. Even with that, Surge does look at him, because he wants to see it, because he likes seeing it. Seeing him.

Surge raises his hand to Koga’s face, and Koga kisses his knuckles, tenderly. The words taste sweet when Surge verbalizes them, his eyes wet, his voice shaking.

“I love you, too.”

[marciabrady]

The Little Mermaid 2 and 3 (bring it on!)

The Little Mermaid 2 and 3:

my all-time ultimate fave character: we all know it's ariel lbr but...again not to be too predictable, andrina! she's SO much funny in every incarnation i read of her and she's the only character that seems to make it with a semblance of character integrity (even more so than ariel who does NOT fare well with these sequels)

a character I didn’t used to like but now do: king triton maybe? i still think he has abusive tendencies and certain things frustrate me about him to no end but i think he's realistic and there's a weight to him that's intriguing to me

a character I used to like but now don’t: queen athena. i thought she was pretty as a kid and i liked her whole voice/singing to the kids plot thing but i just think she's so uninspired and lazy and her voice isn't even that good, her design is blah, and i don't think ariel's mom is that lady lol sorry

a character I’m indifferent about: hm. benjamin??? i guess it's fine that they kinda gay-coded him and it's some representation but he's marina's sidekick, and marina is the ultimate ick, and idk he's just so bland anyway that it's hard to feel anything for him outside of what he is

a character who deserved better: andrina! she deserved WAY more lines and screentime. i wish they got the original andrina back but tara did her best, i guess

a ship I’ve never been able to get into: carlotta and grimsby. like i get they're both side characters that are a man and a woman but obligatory hetero ships that have no chemistry aren't my thing (this is directed at the fandom, the movie doesn't really put them together)

a ship I’ve never been able to get over: i think aquata and that boy they put her with in the third movie are cute i guess? again i'm actively trying not to say ariel/eric

a cute, low-key ship: um. melody and that blonde boy??? i guess

an unpopular ship but I still enjoyed it: ??? there aren't really any other ships in these movies, they honestly don't offer much

a ship that was totally wrong and never should have happened: melody and that guy she danced with in the beginning of the second movie, but that was the point so

my favourite storyline/moment: hm...uh. um. uhhh OH WAIT i do love ariel singing in that hazy room in the beginning of the second movie. the animation is like rugrats level bad BUT jodi's singing carries it

a storyline that never should have been written: THE THIRD MOVIE. i will go to my grave standing by the fact that i think the banishment of music is the DUMBEST plot i've ever heard of/seen in all of hollywood and the fact that disney is SUCH a difficult company to break into and it's so competitive and it's supposed to hold the highest standards for its craft and THAT plot wasn't ridiculed in its initial pitch in the writer's room and how that plot not only contradicts THE FIRST SCENE we see of ariel missing the concert in her original movie but doesn't even make any sense, given that she gives her voice up to be human so clearly she doesn't care about music THAT much is baffling like the minimum wage character performers in the parks get better training on integrity than the writers from that movie

my first thoughts on the show: i honestly never cared about either movie but i think i disliked the third movie less when i first saw it because tlm2 made melody the main character and that really irritated me as a child because i didn't want to see her and her walrus and penguin, i wanted more ariel who was delegated as a side character bc i guess older women or moms just aren't interesting/worthy of being main characters???

my thoughts now: for as much as i personally dislike the second movie, i'm still glad we have it because i think some of jodi benson's singing is superior to any of her other recordings and i'm genuinely astounded by her talent in some songs. the third movie though is painful and i hate it and it makes me resent disney lol

[rush-the-stars]

for the Nai pet-name ask, my immediate thought was what ive read on/off from Avatar fics (im not into the blue people but i have a friend who has NO ONE else into it and, again, im also not into it; but she knows im always down to read fics for fandoms im not in, bc 70, 80% of my joy for fanfics comes from how well-written they are over who theyre about or how in-character they are. so, bc i love her and i love good craftsmanship, i read whatever Avatar fics she likes (off-handedly, youd probably like "daddy issues" by makoodles on ao3, thats one if the Avatar fics my bud has sent me and it seems like your vibe if youd be into that fandom/reading fics regardless of if youre in the fandom or not)) and the reader in the fics ive often have been sent, when she is being romanced by someone like Tsu'tey who was born one of these aliens (as opposed to the dreamwalkers with "demon bodies" who were originally humans (some can switch back and forth still, but Jakesully and Quaritch only have their alien bodies now. but, still, originally human so they wouldnt call a human!reader the insults someone like Tsu'tey would). but yeah the Avatar people fucking HATE humans as a species generally (which. fair. considering the context) hence why im looking at them for the human-hater that is Knives) will go from insulting them to gently calling them the insult as a term of endearment. it usually is "my human" (or "my sky-person" since thats a synonym for human for them, but that isnt applicable here) or "little demon" which, idk, im always weirdly soft for Weird Nicknames Of Endearment esp when they start off as insults but then become full of affection

but yeah i just think thatd suit Nai too, maybe not the terms themselves (tho i can see him using "(little) demon/devil" bc of the Christianity thing tho, i will admit) but rather the concept of an Insult He Would Use For Any Human then becoming a specific term of endearment for the reader. itd be like an illusion of control over his feelings. hes still insulting them, he still hates the reader/all humans, see?? hes insulting them still (pay no attention to the fact that its become less and less insulting over time and spoken with more possessive affection as you take less and less offense to it. maybe the reader has one back for him. (the only time i saw the reader in the Avatar fics ive been sent was in another one by makoodles, where the reader called Tsu'tey "big guy". idk if thats a befitting exchange for someone on the level of Nai tho lmao rip)

---

now, the ask could end there. but, in case you dont like any of the above but do like the idea of "insult to endearment" pipeline, i do have a list of "pet-names" in my notepad app for character inspo so lemme look through my insults section (you might get lucky looking for something Christian-specific tho for Knives but, alas, i wasnt ever raised with that religiok so i only vaguely know it via pop culture osmosis. maybe something with "sinner" or "infidel" or "nonbeliever"?? maybe "angel" in a wholly sarcastic/mocking way, but that feels more modern!Knives than canon-universe!Knives) idk. anyway) similar ones i know that are unrelated to those fics for a fandom in not in would be: hellkite (its a regency era insult im super soft for, for absolutely no reason lmao rip), spitfire, princess/pretty boy, speck (it was a shortened form of "speck of dirt" that became affectionate, kinda like "squirt" but less kid-oriented. i came up with it for a story ive since abandoned for the Male Lead to call the person he has a slowburn hate-to-love relationship with and felt very clever lmao), baby (ive laughed so hard at the "baby"/"now is not the time for pet names"/"im not doing that. im insulting you. you are such a fucking baby" misunderstanding meme as soon as i saw it ages ago), tornado, harpy, nerd, idiot/jerk/dork/pansy/bonehead/dummy/twerp/blockhead/dimwit (aka some of the Schoolyard (Common) Insults though theres others in this list that could also qualify to be here), asshole/bastard/bitch/fucker/dickhead/smart-ass/jackass/dumbass (aka the Includes A Curseword (Common) Insult), heathen/scoundrel/cad/cassanova/rake/ruffian, airhead, pervert/perv, deadbeat, bugger/git/prat (The Brittish Variety), freak, weirdo, coward, scavenger, chicken, missy, hermit, walnut/peanut, punk, porcelain, doll/dolly, charming (as a shortened form of a sarcastic Prince Charming), wannabe, my toy, pet, livestock, furball, poppet, stringbean, flower, kitten/kitty-cat, cupcake/muffin, ladies, canary/parakeet/mockingbird, pretty, carrier (kinds like of disease, to carry a disease, a carrier. could similarly work with an actual illness, like calling someone "herpes" or "pneumonia"), ladybird, morsel, meatlet/meatbag, maggot, sonny/buddy/bestie, "feeble turtle duck" (which is what Eska refers to her "boyfriend", Bolin), Bambi/Mickey Mouse/Minnie Mouse/Seasme Street/Cinderella/Sniw White/Rapunzel/Ugly Duckling/Little Red (Riding Hood. similarly, "Big Bad" or "Mr Wolf"/Princess and the Pea/White Knight/Muppet, pest, colonizer/squatter/settler (close companion ideas that i dont want to attach but also dont, bc the following would only work in a sci-fi sense: planeteer/terraformer/parasite and i tried to think of some more plant ones for my own purposes (tho maybe Nai would call his human something closer to an antonym of a plant, idk) so heres the related listing i came up with for my own devices for your in tandem needs pollinator/weedling/harvester/reaper/uprooter), my little monster, mastercard (as in "my little wallet" kinda sugarbaby talk or something idk), bossy girl/needy thing/runner boy/errand dog, lamb/lamby (as in "sacrificial lamb"?). i hope something here is either to your fancy or inspires you to something that would be ♡

if you want my vote for what i listed that i can at knock my head around and see Nai using as an Insult Of Endearment, id pick from my own wordbank the following: (beside the Christian or anti-plant ones i already mentioned. i think anything here would come to be attached with a possessive "my" inbtime tho) "my human" (maybe also "my mortal"? idk), little demon/devil, spitfire, speck, "my toy", "my pet" (bc i can see him initially rationalizing his attachment to his human as like that between an owner and a pet, or as a plaything of his, or something like that anyway), pest, parasite (this one i specifically like bc he would use it as an insult against all humans but then, in time, it would come to allude to how he wants your existance to depend on him, need him, to survive), livestock, squatter, morsel, meatlet/meatbag, harvester/reaper/uprooter, little monster, needy thing, lamb, canary/parakeet (in a "caged bird" way anyway)

tangentially, if he picks an insult like "my little monster" or "my pet" or something, i can imagine him also becoming obsessed with you allowing him to put his fingers in your mouth as an extension of how hed like controlling you, whether thats to look at and mock how ineffective your mouth would be to defend you or because he wants to be a pest and pull at your tongue. just him going "bare your teeth for me" or "open your mouth" and grazing his fingers along your canines with contemplation (at first to mock you but, in time, to worry how defenseless you are and allow himself to poke at his own bruise). idk. anyway)

ill still make a vote in your poll to my favorite of thr listing but im too shy to reblog yet, forgive me, but i thought you might like this consideration via anon if nothing else considering how skittish i am otherwise with attention. i hope thats okay, and that you have a good day!!

gonna put this under a read more so it doesn’t get any longer!!

firstly anon thank you so much for taking the time to come to my inbox and give me all your thoughts on this i appreciate them greatly 💕💕

now to get into it!!

so i’ve never seen the avatar films….i never saw the first or the second. i know very little about them actually LMAO. however!! i could absolutely see the similarities that you’re pointing out and i think it’s so lovely that you support your friend and their obsession and i think it’s great fun that you’re drawing parallels to other fandoms/thoughts/etc.! that’s what it’s all about baby!!!

(side note: i believe i have read makoodles my hero academia fanfic back in the day and they are a wonderful writer!!! i have a bit of a harder time getting into fanfic of characters/stories i don’t fully know but i’ll absolutely take a peak still!)

okay okay now onto the actual pet name portion of it. first of all your roster of them is crazy expansive. and kinda wonderful to have on hand!!!

also like i think you hit the nail on the head with the idea of a name given as an insult sorta becoming one of endearment over time for nai?? i like that a great deal. i think it’s pretty fitting for him too. if the reader is human, ig!! i have toyed with ideas of a fic where the reader is another independent? bc i think there are others….? elendira the crimsonnail is one right?? or a hybrid of some kind-? and for that reader i definitely think he’d have something a lil more reverent? i could then see something closer to “little one” “dove” or following the religious theme of “angel”

continuing on that note…i was unfortunately raised roman catholic and went to a catholic school most of my life SO. i do have a wide knowledge of this hfksjska i think “lamb” really stood out to me. i could also maybe see (and everyone feel free to boo me and drag me off stage call me crazy etc. etc. BUT)….like a scornful Biblical “child” as in, “Bow your head, child.” that sort of speak.,.,that sort of demeaning version first where he’s trying to assert that he’s older and wiser and better and that you have much to learn from him and then softening later into a gentler term of endearment. but idk i’m not as obsessed w that one it’s just a Thought.

i do like “lamb” quite a bit tho. i am….TUCKING THAT ONE AWAY.

i do like wretched readers and a more specific nickname nai might give them…..wretched little thing, needy little thing, brat, etc. etc. the caged bird is quite intriguing too…songbird, canary, etc.

now finally…..that lil snippet at the end ab nai putting his fingers in your mouth?? oh i’m ILL. i’m SICK. yeahhhh i fan absolutely see that. i think he thumbs at your dull lil canine teeth. and absolutely calls you pet while he does so. THIS IS A GOOD THOUGHT ANON. it’s gonna stick around in my head yup yup yup

ANYWAYS THANK YOU!!! for all your thoughts and ideas 💕💕 i appreciate them greatly and appreciate you taking the time out of your day to message me 💕💕 hope you have a good day as well 💕

[adelle-ein]

hi! i cant believe i saw ur post about my tags! (no worries about @ing or not @ing me.) and ur SO RIGHT about the quality being too high for 2013… (id also love an aesthetic writeup)

it really was just a surprise because the number of gif creators has been drastically reduced since this post type has been dying out on all other platforms. for me it gave me the similar vibe of recent dvd movies being redesigned for vhs covers (tho not quite that old). it was super charming!

and i hope i didnt imply that your gif work was bad or outdated! i think the colors are quite fitting and the quality speaks for itself.

im quite new to the fe3h and ferdibert scene, so im having a great time trawling tumblr for all the great posts ive missed since 2019. i was quite happy to see this particular gif post because it felt like such a classic tumblr staple, like all ships need (at least) one dedicated set of gifs/edits, and this was the one i needed 🥰

thanks again, for both your original post AND reply!

Hi! I'm glad there's no worries there, I went back and forth for a bit and I didn't want it to feel like a callout post because. it was very much not! I just wanted to talk about gif stuff a little bit

and I definitely don't feel bad about your comments or anything! At first I was surprised but when I went and looked at the gifset I definitely agreed with you (despite nitpicks about the time period heh.) It did make me think about how, in general, I don't think tumblr gif-making trends have continued changing as much since the mid-2010s, and if they have I stopped really keeping up with them. I think some of that is probably just me, esp due to my never buying Photoshop CC (i remember looking at others' methods in maybe 2016ish and seeing that I just didn't have the tools others did anymore. my old CS6 is still chugging along…) but also due to the site becoming less popular over time and there being less interest and fewer people getting into gif-making. Like you said it's a bit of a dying medium, and it's never really been a popular post type on other platforms, so if not for tumblr who would people be making gifsets for?

Lol I definitely feel you about that style of post being an older ship staple though! It used to be such a common thing that every fandom had (albiet less for video games bc that's often harder - I do not honestly remember really making that series of 3h ship gifs but that was definitely dedication to the cause at the time, there was so little media to work with). Now a bit of a dying art alas (including from me since I don't really make many gifs at all anymore….learning to draw instead for a number of reasons)

Anyway yes that was a fun rabbit hole to go down! Genuinely I would love to read a Tumblr gif/graphic aesthetic writeup - putting framerates aside I don't think people really use textures that much anymore for example unless they need a background, and sharpening has definitely been toned down. And fewer song quotes. And filters still lean more pastel than the really saturated stuff in the early 2010s. But I don't really have the time atm to do some kind of deep dive myself…it would be really neat though!

(Also just in general as someone who never left, seeing the site come back to life a little bit as the twitter BS kicked off has been fun…idk if it will last but i'm enjoying it while it does!)

[nathank77]

8/6/24

6:45 p.m

Also it was my adapter that broke in the fall. Thankfully my Mac and I am okay. The Mac is worth more than me lol

I feel I'm worth less than a penny. But either way I can record my gameplay again. FUCK OFF twitch. You suck. I dont need you muting my audio and disconnecting bc my gameplay is awesome.

I can't even tell you how many times I played silent hill 2 on twitch and it would constantly disconnect. I wonder why? Maybe I'm being delusional but I am very good at sh2. Ain't no one capable of moving James the way I do. All my sh2 stuff always had disconnections, muted audio, and glitches. I felt very sabotaged like people were trying to stop me from making content/mess up my content.

One day the right person is going to see my sh2 gameplay and I'm going to be featured on ign and all the gaming websites. I know it. Ain't no one makes James move like I do. Ain't no one able to control him and walk and shoot the way I do.

You try. If you never played old silent hill games you'd never know how difficult it is to move your character. I make it look like any other game but if I gave you the controller you'd shit your pants.

Once the right person sees my sh2 shit it will be featured. And I truly think people were stealing my sh2 content and trying to sabotage my videos on twitch. I could be delusional but idk it's funny how I had glitches ONLY on twitch. Weird huh???

When I go offline and record on my Mac I never have glitches. No disconnections. No audio issues cause when I would stream on twitch not only did my audio get muted for "copyright infringement" it would glitch out.

I could be delusional. But I mean I'm not joking buy sh2 HD collection on ps or Xbox and try to move James like I do, you fucking can't. You won't even be able to get him to walk down the fucking hallway. I forget how hard the movement was bc I've mastered it.

Kojima himself would cry happy tears if he saw me move James in the original sh2.

Fuck off twitch I'm back to recording. Imma watch TV anyways and masterbate but when I feel like playing silent hill ain't no one stealing my gameplay and ain't no one sabotaging it.

Once the right person sees me move, I'll be in silent hill fandom history

[sociallyawkward--fics]

HEY BACK AGAIN. idk how long its been cuz mobile is trash but me n my friend were talking abt how we were in a lot of the same fandom spaces as kids. Sanders sides being one of them. n i was like..... Long shot but do u know sociallyawkward--fics.. n at first they were like no i dont think so.. but then they looked u up n went OH MY GOD YEA??? ill send u a screenshot off anon but i told them we were friends n they said it was like finding out i knew a celebrity LMAO -H (ironic considering theyre prob more popular on ao3 than u😭 they briefly turned back into a 12yo fanboy)

its still so crazy to me ive known u for so long n met him like 3-4 years ago worlds collide ..... Also u can post this though im off anon if u want idc -H

ALSO. since im here. idk if i ever told u my age but when i sent my first ask to u i was probably 11. maybe 10 even. im turning 18 in a couple months now. its hard to bring myself to read some of the asks (ok most of the asks) i sent u over the years bc i was an incredibly anxious and awkward autistic kid. But u always treated me with so much love hahakjs at the time i was rly struggling n had very few friends n AS MUCH AS IT MAKES ME CRINGE TO LOOK BACK ON u were honestly the only older person i could talk to n it rly meant a lot lol. im so much more confident n comfortable in myself than i was all those years ago n ik i dont send u asks nearly as frequently anymore but tbh even if eventually its only once every few years ill always think back on u so fondly n gratefully. Neway i literally hate being sappy so ill shut up here but yeah. Thanks n such -H

ALSO IDK IF UR ACTIVE ON AMY SOCIAL MEDIA RLY?? BUT IF U R I CAN GIVE U SOME OF MY SOCIALS mostly i just tweet abt my day occasionally on twitter but i also have a sideblog where i post art. just thinking that maybe then i wouldnt have to be like 'and heres a quick summary of the past 8 months' n u could check up on me whenever instead of only seeing me when i send asks😭 -H (its also so less formal cuz when i send in asks u Gotta respond whereas if i post 'just ate a kickass burger' u can just. Like it. idk idc either way but lmk ^__^)

-----------------------------------

I'VE BEEN MEANING TO ANSWER THESE FOR MONTHS SINCE I'VE BEEN USING TUMBLR AGAIN AND MY LACK OF OBJECT PERMANENCE HAD ME KEEP FORGETTING I AM SO SORRY 😭😭😭😭

dkjfhkdhf omg that is so wild that you have a friend who also knows about me dkjfhdsf Sanders Sides (back when it was waaaaay smaller of a fandom lol) was the first (and tbh only, really) fandom where i had any real level of "popularity" as a fic writer, and i fed off that high for SO LONG lol -- hearing that people were obsessed with my work, both then and now after the fact, is genuinely so surreal dfkjhdjkfh like. i am just Here, i am just Some Dude who wrote some words that got them weirdly popular at 17-18 dkjsfhdkjfh (also cuz i try to gather all your asks into one post, you continue to remain anonymous just cuz i copy-pasted them into the post in the same order they were received lol)

Dude it is CRAZY that you are almost 18 (or, by the time i am finally managing to answer this with my Bad Brain Powers procrastinating it so long, already 18) -- I looked back and I was 18 when you sent your first ever ask to me dkjfhdf that's so wild. I am so honored that you saw me as an older person you could come and talk to, even if it was just through anonymous tumblr asks for the past 6+ years lol. I always think of you fondly too, and I am so proud of you for the way you've grown up and grown into your confidence

ALSO YOU CAN TOTALLY SEND ME YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA djfdjdsjkf you can absolutely send me any of your socials!!! I know your main blog because you've sent some asks without it (have I ever remembered to follow it??? I meant to but I can't remember, this is also a Brain Forget-y Accidental Procrastination thing), but I would LOVE to see your art sideblog and def feel free to send me your twitter!! I have not opened my twitter in like. 3 months, because i was having Unhealthy Habits so i tucked the app into a pocket out of site and stopped using it for a while, but I am doing better now and would definitely open it back up more often again to see what you were up to

Also!!! You can always feel free to DM me on any of my blogs/sideblogs here on tumblr, too! You don't have to wait to send an ask (though I love receiving asks from you, don't ever feel like you have to stop even if we connect elsewhere!), you can always DM me on any of my blogs (or on any other socials we may exchange, too!)

[elendsessor]

got this ask last night and slept on it since not a lot of the ones i listed were original aka i doubt nobody unironically shipping them (in fairness when i was little if it wasn’t on ff.net, wattpad, or deviantart, the pairing didn’t exist). i remembered a couple old ships i entertained the idea of when i was younger, a couple joke ones i had that probably suck ass and are cursed, and one shit one i made up lol.

(putting a list beneath this cut these are kinda cursed)

i used to love the idea of shinjiro x kanji. idk if anyone ever actually thinks it makes sense or thinks it’s cute. i mean they’re both the big tough guy who secretly loves cute and/or stereotypically feminine things + are at the very least bisexual. modernsona has a lot of similar character archetypes used for party members so some of it can theoretically work (unless it’s a ship involving ken, koromaru, or morgana that’s just no please god). really liked the idea of sumire x p3 femc too. in the process of writing this i thought of raidou x naoto so do what you will with this information. megaten timelines are fucky.

a while back i received another ask regarding “how would shipping in monster hunter even work” and to that i say unless it’s stories, considering how individual characters only started recently (at least with world) getting a more individual focus since it’s now less about hunter culture and a bit more on the story, it’s kinda all over the place. that unless you think the implied monsterfuckers count. you can do a lot with the ace hunters in a shipping sense but i also like guildmarn x that one woman who handles the high rank quests in 4u. don’t ask. (and if shipping monsters together counts i uh. i like the idea of malzeno x guanzorumu and for some reason astalos x valstrax again don’t ask.)

back when fe echoes came out i was also simultaneously playing botw, so i had a weird clashing amount of brainrot and thought link x celica was a cute idea. i mean since alm and link are both kinda mercenary-like (though i don’t think it’s outright stated in anything) and the whole intertwining fates between link and zelda along with alm and celica the parallels are there. it might not work but i at least want them to just meet somehow.

this is a joke ship based on some memes i saw relating to how noah looked like a cross between flynn and tatsuya back when xc3 was first revealed. noah xc3 x flynn smtiv.

also when i was first introduced to xenoblade bc of the monado and alvis being connected i had the cursed idea of dunban x alvis. i was like 12 or some shit.

i’m still pretty new to the yokai watch fandom so idk how people feel about hailey x katie. maybe it has some enjoyers out there. but i also thought of the cursed idea of ash ketchum pokemon x nate yes you can shoot me for that if it’s cursed.

last but certainly the least when i first read through stone ocean me and a friend joked about goku x part 6 jotaro. it would never work. it didn’t make sense unless being absentee fathers count. i’m sorry.

[roboromantic]

man I thought I was more or less desensitized to my laughing gas problem bc I can at least like.  read those words without tasting it.    but SOMETHING in a couple of the aisles at Walmart smelled so much like it that I almost had a meltdown.    especially since it was like “okay I got the price I needed here, time to fucking Get Out of Here” and then of course both ends of the aisle were blocked 🙃     The weirdest thing is they weren’t even adjacent aisles or carrying the same kind of things??? idk if maybe it was from something they use for cleaning or WHAT but GD it sucked

on the bright side, I’d been kinda frustrated yesterday with voice training bc like, it’s clearly been helping, but there’s still Something I need to fix and I have no idea exactly what or how, but then today I think I more or less figured it out? I’m still not even halfway through the timeline for these exercises and obviously I’m fighting like. 30 years of muscle memory. so I mean I know it’s gonna take time and I shouldn’t really be frustrated this early on lmao. but whatever I did today really helped with my impatience. It ain’t perfect, far from it, but like.

Okay so I talked to brother #2 a couple weeks back while trying to use what I’d gotten from voice training at the time and he said he didn’t really notice a difference (which is kinda wild, bc at the very least there was definitely a LOT more resonance going on but w/e.) And then today I got home not too long after I’d finished some exercises and saw brother #3, so I figured I’d try talking to him after having had this little breakthrough. He immediately asked if I was sick lol. So yeah it probably still doesn’t sound like.    great.    but then again that’s exactly what my aunt asked the first time I saw her after my voice changed soooooooo it’s progress?

I don’t really have any recordings of my voice from before I started taking T besides some old dumb fandom memes/songs and super shitty videos from a high school project where I talked for like. 5 seconds total. I KNOW I had a perfectly good recording where I was reading part of a short story but I cannot find it Anywhere. it was on Soundcloud but I guess I deleted it at some point??? There mighta been some in my old email address that my dad set up on his own server or something? but apparently he shut that down ages ago so I don’t have any copies of those emails. same with old school emails, those obviously got deactivated ages ago.

but anyway what I was gonna say was I DO have some recordings of my voice as it is now, and maybe tomorrow I’ll try to record something after I do the voice exercises just to see if it actually sounds as different as it feels.

[seancekitsch]

F, P, and T for the fanfic asks?

F: Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

this is from pure evil

“I’m about to invite you back to my place based on how you answer this last question.”

Fuck fuck fuck fuck. Okay, Richie thinks. This is happening. Richie hasn’t had sex he’s actually wanted in so long. He had to use sex as a tool to get to where he is now, but maybe he can live a little, have some fun. 

“And that is…?”

She tilts her head until her lips brush his earlobe. He shivers, and grips his glass so hard it might shatter in his hand. 

“What did it feel like when you did it?” she whispers in his ear, and his blood runs cold. 

“Wh-what?” he struggles to find the words.

“Don’t lie, I know you, remember? I know what you did.”

Her soft lips, her body heat, the way she saw him plainly, it was almost too much. Richie has to hold himself back from grabbing her right here and now. 

Fuck it, fuck. She understands. She’s someone just like me, he thinks. She gets it. Stab TV woman, I’m ready to risk it all for you.

She drags her nail across his thigh, drawing a line right above his knee and to a smaller wound and watches as his jaw tenses. She pulls back slightly, just enough to see the look in his eyes, and there’s something dark in his expression. He’s right where he wants her.

“It felt fucking amazing,” he practically growls, and she goes in for the kill. She captures Richie’s lips with her own quickly seeking out to bite at his bottom lip; he tastes copper.

okay i just feel really proud of this little section bc i love the idea of richie meeting his match and idk thought i was clever for this. i really like this fic and i want to write a sequel!

P: Are you what George R. R. Martin would call an “architect” or a “gardener”? (How much do you plan in advance, versus letting the story unfold as you go?)

oh im a gardener for the most part except for this most recent adrian fic, thats why most of my stuff is one shots or like really disjointed lmaoooo

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

omg any kind of like, bully or mean version of a character that isn't normally like that. like, y'all idk but if i was reader i would be in JAIL if anyone spoke to me like that. forreal. grinds my gears. on a less infuriating note, i also really can't stand any single mother or pregnancy fics but thats more of a personal squick i really just get ill at the thought of the whole carrying to term thing but i know other people might love that so like no hate to them.

[tiredsystem-r-us]

Aaaa, I'm sorry to tell you friendo, but that's a pretty old post and I never ended up writing the essay unfortunately (⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠)

From what I remember (which is a surprising amount given how bad my memory is), the main points were essentially going to be:

1. They have a lot of obvious differences and a lot of obvious similarities, and it makes complete sense that their differences would actually enhance their relationship (ie: I could absolutely see Remus's whole unrestrained nature being soothing to Janus because Janus is very used to putting up a façade, but he doesn't have to around Remus)

2. That even though most of the others see them as evil, they get along with each other. Idk, I just love that about them, I feel like most of the others would assume they didn't talk much or something but nope, actually they're in love! In fact, they're doing better than maybe any other relationship in the series right now, given how bad it is in current canon and the fact that they get along well enough to play DDR with each other (in Patton's room, no less, because Mischief) and just enjoy each other's company.

3. The idea of them getting along so well in direct opposition to the way most of the others think of them as evil is just so good. Like, back in the day I had a whole fic idea about this, but I really think the others would assume that the two of them either don't really talk to each other or actively don't like each other, and the idea that they're being soft and happy together in spite of that is just adorable.

Anyways, I'm glad you loved the idea that much!

Ah! Thanks for letting me know :)

I’m personally not extremely strong about ships in general but I saw the essay thought you’d had and was like, “another one” lol. I recently wrote a fandom related essay for school and no joke turned it in for a grade, so I’ve been thriving a bit with that type of mildly chaotic essay vibes /pos /lh

From what you outlined here, an initial response of mine to reading these points included:

“heheh DDR wholesome mischief go brr yes” and

“why does that sound like such an easy/simple translation of a portrayed interactions into head cannon or fics? It’s chaotically lovely how smooth that interpretation could blend out into fan works” and

“unhinged Remus and restrained Janus gives fun parental-friend vibes, like Remus hanging upside down on the fan eating chalk while Janus is sighing cause that’s the third time this week and then Remus bounces down and forces Janus into letting go and having fun for a bit cause he’s been stressed lately”

All of which were positive responses bc I’m a sucker for nearly everything relating to fandoms and favorite characters of mine from them (*cough cough* Janus *cough cough*)

- Nyren (xe/it)