#idk this is dumb cus you won’t ever see this

[ca-d]

one of those heavy feelings type of day

[ssamie]

them getting caught simping for their s/o (part 1)

·˚ ༘⌗ just hq boys simping for you and getting caught simping by their friends

·˚ ༘⌗ characters include: tanaka ryuunosuke, oikawa tooru, iwaizumi hajime

·˚ ༘⌗ gender neutral pronouns were used.

·˚ ༘⌗ warnings: swearing and fluff lol

gen masterlist.                      hq masterlist.

TANAKA RYUUNOSUKE

honestly are we surprised?

he's already a massive simp, so why should he hold back when it comes to his s/o

he simps by literally any and every way you could think of

hyping you up? ofc, no need to say anything he already does that on a daily basis

want cuddles? say less,, he's already waiting with his arms wide open

want to go on dates? who cares about practice, he'll go on a date with you anytime, no matter what the consequence he may face

want to meet up at 3am for no reason at all? wdym, he's already up and waiting outside your house

you're sick? no no, he's already in your room taking care of you with meds, soup, and cuddles <3

i could go on but...you get the point

anyways

he gets caught simping by the team when they walked past you and him sitting by a tree on the school yard

he had you sitting on his lap with a gleeful and lovesick smile as he brings his chopsticks up to your mouth to feed you

"do you like that, baby?" he asked you with a smile. "yeah, it's very good" you said. "did you cook this?" you asked him

tanaka proudly smiled and nodded "yup! i have to make sure my baby gets only the best food there is!" he exclaims as he wraps his arms around your waist

you laugh lightly and playfully smack him in the chest "you're too sweet, ryu" you said "but thank you."

"hmm, anything for you, babe" he muttered in reply as he pressed a soft kiss on your cheeks and temples

the whole team is watching with varying reactions lmao

first of all, noya and hinata are crying from jealousy (suga too but he won't admit that 🙄)

tsukki, yams, and the other second years are snickering while daichi and asahi jokingly join along

they tease tanaka about it, but it's not like he cares lmao 💀

"damn what a simp."

"you're so smitten it's actually sad."

tanaka: "you're just jealous you don't have an s/o!"

it's true. they were just jealous 🙄🤞🏼

they're still very happy tanaka actually found someone that loved him back. they all knew he had a heart of gold, and he deserved every bit of love he received from you

i love him :(

OIKAWA TOORU

oikawa is actually a very affectionate partner

he does have a high ego, but he will succumb once he gets a quick glimpse of you

to him, you're the most beautiful being to ever walked the earth, not even kidding.

that's usually how he simps lol

he just praises you about pretty much everything

gives you never ending compliments and aims to make you feel like the most perfect person alive, because thats how he sees you

also loves physical touch <3

doesn't have to be sensual,, he just likes feeling your skin on his.

his favourite is when you're holding hands because his hands are much bigger than yours and he finds that cute >:(

"tooru, practice will start soon" you said to him as you comb your fingers through his hair, though being careful enough to not mess it up.

"hmph" he said, though it only came out as muffled murmurs, seeing as his face was buried into your chest

"you're very clingy today" you hummed "something wrong?" you asked him

his hand, which he felt the need to intertwine with yours, squeezed yours tighter as he brought them up to his lips

"mm, i just love you that's all" he said as he went back to burying his face into his your sweatshirt.

you smiled and kissed the crown of his head, making him sigh in content. "love you too, tooru"

they clown him.

the whole team just clowns him.

it would start with iwaizumi quietly snickering, though he wasn't really that fazed since he sees oikawa like this with you a lot

but makki and mattsun saw you too and just burst out laughing. idk why either they just did

they, along with yahaba, would just laugh and throw in some teasing comments

he usually responds with petty replies

"damn, what a simp"

"didn't think the oikawa tooru would like anyone but himself"

oikawa: "shut up! stop teasing me, you're all dumb! you're just mad i have a god/goddess of an s/o. you probably don't know what that's like cus you're all ugly. unlike me ofcourse. though blah blah blah.."

oikawa sweetie... shut up <3

kindaichi laughs along,, kunimi and kyotani just doesn't care lol

i love tooru sm :(

IWAIZUMI HAJIME

i love you sir 🛐

anyways, iwaizumi is a very loving boyfriend!! very protective and affectionate, but more showy when you're in private

he could never say no to you, no matter the request

you could probably ask him to eat cat shit and he'd do it for a kiss ngl

okay.. maybe don't go that far.. but yeah

you want kisses? he's not the biggest fan of pda but he'll do it if u really want it

wanna go on a date? can't say no to that

want him to buy you food/clothes? he'll do it no questions asked.

i could list down more things but my brain can't think of anything else so no <3

anyways

you were outside the gym, getting drinks and snacks and just talking

and you thought it would be a good idea to try on some clips you got on his hair

"please, hajime" you pleaded with a pout "i got these really cute clips yesterday but im wearing enough already" you said

"so i want you to wear the rest" you present him a small bag of colorful butterfly clips with a smile

iwaizumi looked at it with dread, not really wanting his head to look like a rainbow. but one glance at your hopeful smile and he just ~melts~

"ofcourse, baby" he said with a small smile "do what you want" his smile only widened as you cheered, excitedly picking out the colors to accessorise him with

"would you like blue and pink or blue and purple?" you asked

"which do you like more?" he asked "hm. maybe blue and pink.. i dunno though. you'll look cute with both" you said

"just do both then" iwaizumi shrugged as he leaned his head back on your lap, closing his eyes and humming as you comb through his hair with your fingers.

"thank you for letting me play with your hair, haji~" you cooed with a soft laugh as you press a kiss on his nose

"anything for you, love" iwaizumi replied with a chuckle

everyone just stops for a second. just pause.

they definitely didn't expect to see iwaizumi to enter the gym with his hair decorated with blue, pink and purple butterfly clips.

oikawa gasps in shock and would probably ask to borrow some.

he already knows its from you since iwa is his best friend, and he really didn't want to get a beating so early into practice.

"iwa-chan! can i have some?! give me the blue ones!"

iwa: "no way, shittykawa get your own fucking clips!

makki and mattsun would tease him to death. they were the only ones brave enough to do so :p

"damn, y/n really had you wrapped around their finger, huh?"

"ah, the things we do for love~"

"what a simp"

makki and mattsun came home with a bruise that day.

kunimi and kindaichi are quiet. they didn't want to end up like the two idiots. though kunimi may or may not have snapped a quick photo

kyotani thinks its iconic. he's an iwaizumi supremacist, what can i say.

i love iwa sm pls 😖

i think im getting better at making headcannons,, idk tho jjsbsnabs

[angelinajoliesbottom]

Idk who to talk to abt this so im sending it to my rant favourite accounts lmfaoooo but Im in my 20s and have never been in a relationship or had a love interest and recently a guy at my work had been flirting with me (or so I thought). He would stare at me a lot and look down and smile and get really close and touch my hand sometimes and I started getting excited. It made me feel special and wanted, finally, and today i was gonna work up the courage and flirt back cus I thought he would lose interest but I found out he had a girlfriend who he is moving in with. Luckily he’s already found a new job so I won’t see him again but i feel stupid and embarrassed and annoyed that I wasted my time thinking a guy that hot was into me but im glad i was too shy and shocked to give him any attention back anyways so all i can do is laugh. I hate men. 🤦🏽‍♀️

omg bby dont worry its not your fault fuck that ugly ass dude you deserve way better than him and dont settle for someone just cause you havent had a relationship yet 20 is still young so make sure your first love is the best person you ever meet and not some dumb dude at work you literally deserve the world babe love you lots😤❤️💕❤️💕❤️💕❤️💕

[timextoxhajima]

Playlist Feels

Member: *at the point of writing this i haven’t yet decided but i went out today and this song started playing and my heart just starting beATInG SO faST

*update: ended up settling for san

A/N: I won’t write smut/anything aggressive for jongho (or any ‘00 liner for that matter) so until they turn 21 internationally, i’ll refrain from writing anything nasty. this goes for other idols who are ‘00 liners and younger.

Genre: shitty-ass angst, aggressive shoving lol idk, what’s a desire-inspired fic if there’s no smut heh (lowkey fifty shades vibes irdk what im doing at this point of time) *kind reminder that it’s been too fucking long since i’ve written some smexy smut so please bear with me ;_;

Word Count: 3.6k

you could almost smell the money that everybody in the room collectively have under their belts. everybody was fitted in suits and extravagant gowns and blazers and dresses-- it was difficult to believe that these people would ever wear anything else besides whatever they were wearing now.

your parents had gone off to greet the older, more important people of the organisation, or bureau, or whatever group that coordinated this event was called. you were stuck staring at your glass of champagne while your fiance picks at the little nuts in the tray that was sitting in the middle of the small table. 

fiance, more like annoying family friend you’ve been actual friends with for nearly ten years. 

“do me a favour and cut it out, would you?” you glare at him through your long, false lashes, bringing the champagne glass to your lips and taking a sip. mingi looks at you and pouts, quickly throwing a nut into his mouth before he wipes the crumbs away on his shit-expensive Saint Laurent blazer. 

you groan under your breath, rolling your eyes so hard that you could see the insides of your head. 

“who picked out the gown? i know you have a thing against gowns so why’d you let them fit you in this one?” mingi munches on the nut and nods towards your fit. you don’t bother to look down at yourself, because you couldn’t stand the sight of it. 

the v-neck cutting was so low down your chest that if you pulled it aside with any considerable amount of strength, your chest would’ve been exposed. 

it didn’t help that the gown was red, and on top of that, there was a long, ridiculous slit up the dress by your left leg. 

it’s like you were a walking target. 

“does it look like i had much of a choice?” you eye him with an annoyed look, finishing whatever was left of the champagne. “in fact, i don’t even remember the last time i made a decision for myself. fun.”

mingi gives you a pathetic smile and wraps his arm around your shoulders, the soft material of his blazer grazing against your skin. 

someone pushes the door open to the function room, and everybody around starts making their way in. your heels would’ve been caught stepping on your gown, so mingi offers you and arm to hold while you grab a bunch of material with your free hand to make walking easier.

your fiance helps you settle into your seat before sitting down next to you. the function room starts filling up, every now and then some ceo or businessman or someone walks by your table and you have no choice but to stand up to greet them. 

but all you wanted to do was to go home to the comfort of your bed and binge watch your favourite series.

not stand here, in the middle of a function room in the country’s most expensive hotel, and let these middle-aged, possibly married-with-children, men caress your hands like they didn’t already know you had a fiance. 

“you seem to have a way around men, don’t you?” mingi teases quietly, helping you push the chair in as you sat down from shaking some stranger’s hand. 

“it’s the dress, and the hair and the make up. otherwise, i’m pretty sure they don’t give a fuck.” 

mingi sucks on his teeth at your straightforward statement, noting that your parents were coming round the table. you look up to search for them upon mingi’s announcement, and you notice they were talking to another couple with their children trailing closely behind them. 

“oh god, another one--” you spit under your breath. mingi elbows you a little, standing up and cuing you to do the same as your parents come by with the other couple and their clearly-uninterested son and overly-enthusiastic daughter.  

“mingi, y/n, this is mr and mrs choi, and this is choi haneul and choi san,” your mother gestures to them as the couple reaches out for a handshake. you and mingi take turns to shake their hands, including the two children. 

you were so used to faking a smile that you were sure nobody could’ve been able to tell you absolutely hated being here. 

but your ‘service’ smile struggles to remain loyal to your need to be the perfect chaebol when you catch their son staring at you, with eyes that could kill. 

you reach your palm out to him, and he takes your hand with a firm grip. 

you almost feel something similar to static, but you shake it off by giving him a bright smile.

he reciprocates, offering you a wide grin that exposes his dimples and folded his eyes into long, slits. 

that 180 degree switch... psycho.

you pull away, and you feel his reluctance to let go for a split second. 

a frown appears on your forehead in that instant, but he releases your hand quickly, as if noticing the change of expression on your face. 

your parents wave them off as they make their way to another table. you return to your seat, now sitting between mingi and your mother who just wouldn’t shut up about the choi family.

something about splitting the company into two so each their children gets an equal half. 

something about them being very capable. 

blah blah blah...

the function hall gets filled up and every table was fully occupied. name tags were placed on tables by the seats the guests were allocated, and your eyes run through the many names and titles. you couldn’t find a single one that didn’t have a big company name attached to them. 

mingi humors you the entire dinner, and being your only source of entertainment, you couldn’t help but still feel lucky that he was chosen to be your fiance.

there were so many things about being a chaebol that was so wrong and so pathetic, and mingi knew very well how much you hated it. both of you grew up as childhood friends, for the sole reason that both your parents were partners in an important project. 

so big, rich people gatherings? your weekend plans for almost ten years straight.

when you were told that a marriage was in plan for you though, you remember threatening to run away from home unless your fiance was mingi.

and since mingi was a chaebol himself, your parents were more than happy to let the both of you get engaged, even if the two of you didn’t actually love one another. 

there was some dumb auction going on with the mc yelling into the damn mic every ten minutes, not even giving you the peace of day to eat your food that took forever to come. mingi tries to get you involved by raising your name tag, helping you offer three million for a premium yacht.

you hiss at him, nearly giving him a slap across the face when you won it.

your mother reminds you not to have too much wine and champagne, but you didn’t even want to be here in the first place. you were going to get married into the song family anyway, so it gave you the courage and liberty to do whatever the hell you wanted. 

you were so used to drinking champagne and wine that mingi doesn’t stop you until your face finally flushed bright red, and you were beginning to smile and giggle at the mc. 

an unfamiliar sight for your fiance. 

“do you need to go to the washroom to get yourself together? you look tipsy,” mingi leans into your ear and asks with concern. his question pulls out an ugly look on your face, and you reach for your champagne glass, only to realise that it was empty. 

you huff in disappointment. mingi gives you a blank look, knowing that you weren’t done with whatever attitude you had up your sleeve tonight. 

“i’m gonna hurl out all that fucking champagne and you better have my glass refilled when i get back,” you try to whisper to mingi, but you belch out all the gas that was in your stomach. 

“disgusting--” mingi winces at the scent of the alcohol. you laugh, pushing yourself out of the seat and grabbing your purse, leaning over to your parents to inform them you were heading for the washroom. 

it was a good thing you weren’t drunk, but you definitely would be if you had returned for more champagne had you not stuffed your finger down your throat. you wretched loudly, knowing that you deliberately searched for the most out-of-the-way washroom in the building, and there was nobody around to hear those inhumane noises. expensive liquid flushes out your throat and you choke on the sight. the burning sensation wasn’t a good experience, but you couldn’t be any less bothered.

you lick your lips, still cautious that you had lipstick on. turning around, you struggle to your feet and head over to the sink, head hanging low and palms pressed flat against the marble surface. 

you gather the tap water in your hand, slurping it up to try and get rid of the taste of stomach acid and alcohol in your mouth. 

didn’t help. 

you mutter some curse words under your breath, looking back up at the mirror to fix your hair and your lipstick, pulling your shoulders back so you were standing with the posture your mother spent most of your life scolding you about. 

you take a step out of the washroom, and your eyes were so occupied with mentally berating the hell out of your obscene dress that you physically ram yourself into someone’s shoulder. 

the impact throws your balance off completely, but you feel an arm snake around your waist just moments before you got fall flat on the ground. 

“oh, you.”

you fidget with uneasiness, anxiously getting your balance back in check and shoving him off you. you look down at yourself, making sure your boobs were still under the material and your slit didn’t get any higher up your thighs. 

“you’re welcome, by the way.”

you return your attention to choi san, who now had a sneaky smirk drawn across his lips. he was in an all white fit, with small black details like his cuff links and black gemstone accentuating his entire look. 

“sorry.”

you clear your throat, feeling your face flush from the realisation that you could’ve been completely fucked over by your parents if they saw the way you responded. 

‘that’s no way of thanking someone,” they’d say. 

“what are you doing here anyway? it’s such a far walk from the function hall.”

you raise a cocky brow, tongue looking for small bits of food stuck in the crevices of your teeth. you couldn’t be bothered to maintain your image now that you’ve already acted like he was molesting you. 

“me? i could ask you the same,” you tilt your head to the side, hands looking for the slit of your dress to push aside. you wouldn’t want to trip on your walk away from him. 

“i don’t like these functions. i like meeting people but i definitely don’t like watching them spend their money on ridiculous items.”

you sigh, wondering how long you were going to be stuck in this meaningless conversation with him. 

“you do realise the proceeds all go to charity anyway, don’t you?” 

“is that why you bought the premium yacht for three million?”

“no, my fiance used my name.”

“so you’re saying you didn’t want to provide the financial assistance to charity?”

your eyes harden at his accusation, and you couldn’t be more frustrated. if you weren’t in your obscene v-neck gown with that useless slit up your thighs, you would’ve already gotten your heels off to whack him on the head. 

all your emotions must’ve been put up for display all across your face, because choi san flashes you a devilish grin, eradicating any hint of his dimple-smile from before. 

the same 180 change.

“my family and i do enough charity every year. this three million doesn’t mean shit,” you take a step forward, not letting his demonic presence faze you. he was just about a few inches taller than you, so confronting him like this was nothing compared to mingi.

“so, mr choi,” you hiss under your breath, your nose just right under his. “if you’ve got nothing else constructive to say, then do excuse me. i have an event to be at.”

you gave it a few moments for him to flinch or react, but he fails. you smirk to yourself, convinced that you’ve won this showdown. you turn, ready to walk away from him, but he grabs your arm just as you walk past him and wraps his arm around your waist. if he had invested more effort into the act, he would’ve easily picked you up.

“what the fuck-- let me go!” you try thrashing yourself out of his grip, but he only pulls you harder into the hidden lift around the corner. you try to make a run for the door before it closes, but he holds you back as he hits a button on the lift panel.

he shoves you up against the wall, your rear resting against the bar that lined the walls where people could hold. he rests his palms on the bar on either sides of your hips, and he pushes his face dangerously close to yours. 

you were fuming at this psycho, but deep down in your heart, you knew you were the one to blame for inciting it. 

“you know...” he drags a finger down your earlobe and your jawline. it takes you awhile to realise that you were slowly turning away from him, gradually becoming unable to continue this power play with him. “you haven’t said ‘thank you’.”

you scoff, eyes shifting to meet his without turning your head. you wipe your canine teeth with your tongue, trying your best to read his face. 

but all you could see was that devilish grin you don’t think you were ever going to forget. 

you try to hold back from saying anything, knowing that every word you said from this moment on was going to decide his next move. but you were angry with this piece of shit, and your temper invites you to spit out the words you had on the tip of your tongue. 

“or what?”

i should not have said that. 

“that’s completely up to you.”

choi san smirks again, and you’ve never seen someone look so lustfully challenged before. the look in his eyes was enough to rile you up to it as well. though your head was screaming at you, telling you to stop, but your heart and body say otherwise. 

he sucks in a deep breath as he takes a step back, letting the lift doors open to the hallway where all the suites were. 

you expected him to grab your wrist and pull you along, but he doesn’t. confusion wasn’t the right word to describe the overwhelming feeling that ate you up, and you hated yourself for it. 

you watch in dissatisfaction as he calmly walks out of the lift and walks down about four doors. he stops right outside the cream colored door, his white fit contrasting the brown hallways, and turns to look at you.

that devilish smile was gone, replaced with a look you couldn’t begin to describe. 

you feel your stomach churn as he reaches up to his neck and starts to undo the top few buttons, exposing his collarbone. his free hand pulls out a card from the inside of his blazer, and he gets the door open. 

your hands were balled up into fists, and you could still feel his trace on your jaw as you watched him walk into the room. 

don’t do it.

you suck in a deep breath, frozen in place. 

don’t fucking do it. he knows exactly what he’s doing. 

the lift doors begin to shut. 

don’t. do. it. 

your needs and desires engulf you like flames in a burning building, and you found yourself storming straight into the suite, eyes only searching for him. before you could even notice the size of the room, you were shoved backwards against the carpeted wall.

hands were hungrily searching your body for any crevice for him to dig into, and you could already feel your lipstick getting smudged between both your lips. 

his fingers find the material of your dress that goes over your shoulders instead, and he doesn’t hesitate to pull them down your arms. you struggle to get his white blazer off, completely ignoring the rare gem that was pinned above his breast pocket. 

you were already running out of breath, teeth clashing and your tongues messily swirling around each other as his hands find the zip on your back. by the time your dress pools around your feet, you get the buttons on his shirt undone. 

you run your hands down his chest and toned stomach, but was interrupted by him picking you up against the wall. he doesn’t hesitate to attach his lips to your breasts like a hungry kitten, and the heat between the two of you becomes nearly impossible to contain.

his hair gets tangled in your fingers, desperately trying to find something to grip while lewd sounds escape your lips.

“you must not like losing,” he pulls you away from the wall, eyes looking up at you as he walks elsewhere in the room. you expected yourself to be thrown on a bed, but instead you find yourself pressed up against the window panel of the room, with the city right below your feet. 

“don’t you fucking dare,” you threaten with a low voice. but you hear him scoff, arm wrapped around your waist as he positions himself so that you were pressed flat against his chest and your breasts against the cold surface of the window. 

“but i already did.”

he whispers into your ear, somehow finding both your wrists and holding them in one hand while the other snakes down your stomach and under the only piece of clothing you were wearing. 

you bite on your bottom lip, shutting your eyes tightly upon the contact of his fingers on your sensitive spot. you hear him chuckle and he realises that you had absolutely no control over what your body needed - or wanted.

“aren’t you going to tell me that you have a fiance?” his voice was low, and almost threatening. he hooks your underwear by the side and pulls it off the curve of your rear, letting it pool around the heels you were still wearing. 

you gulp and huff heavily, listening to him undo his belt while your wrists were still trapped in his left hand. 

“answer the question, mrs song.” he presses his already hardened manhood against your core, and the contact sends chills up your spine to your head. you could feel yourself slowly losing all sense of control by the second, and him psychologically pushing you into a corner to make you submit to him wasn’t helping. 

“we could always stop now, and you could go back to the function hall like nothing happened.”

now you don’t feel the material of his underwear, but the bare skin of his manhood rubbing against your naked core. the sensation finally pushes you over the edge, and you choose your desires over the fucking obligations you were born with.

“please don’t stop.”

you brace yourself as he pushes himself into you, and he doesn’t give you much time to process the explosive feelings of need in your abdomen. picking up his pace, you feel his grip on your wrists tightening as the excessive thrusting pushes you nearer and nearer against the glass.

you hear nothing but the obscene sounds of skin slapping against skin, and the combination of the mewls and groans the both of you were offering one another. 

his free hand finds your sensitive nub, and the combination of his ramming into you with the circles drawn with pressure pushes you closer to your climax. your legs tremble under the overwhelming feeling, and he finally releases your wrists. he wraps his arm around your waist, holding you up while he continues fucking you against the window. 

you feel the weight in your abdomen get heavier after every thrust, and your irregular moans tell him that you were reaching your high. 

something inside you snaps, and you raise your head to look at the window, water vapour already collected in messy patterns on the surface. 

he pulls out and you feel his load landing on your lower back, the only sounds you could hear now was the panting from the both of you. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

you take your seat between mingi and your mother again, legs still shaking ever so slightly, and you were hoping nobody was going to notice that your hair didn’t look at neat as it was before.

“i thought you got lost in the bathroom,” mingi looks at you while you down a whole cup of water before attacking the champagne. 

“well,” you shrug, eyes catching a glance of choi san returning to his seat. “i’m here now, aren’t i?”

[bigskydreaming]

Hey guys, don’t forget that Dick isn’t always all heart eyes and laughter, like he actually has this HUGE wicked temper, but like, don’t ever ever demonstrate like, one of the things he gets mad about being when people meet him and make the really-played-out-but-still-in-so-many-damn-fics-i-stg joke “Seriously? Your name is Dick? Wow how much did your parents hate you?”

Because this is FUNNY, see, it’s a JOKE. The only reasonable response for the kid whose loving parents were murdered in front of him when he was eight is to go lol oh haha that’s a good one dude, there’s absolutely no reason that would ever be upsetting to him, especially if coming from newly adopted siblings or teammates.

Idk guys, just....doesn’t it ever seem awful convenient that like we hear sooooo often about what an asshole Dick is to Jason when they first meet and we see him having that oh so infamous temper with Jason in fics all the time....but when Jason for instance says this to Dick in a TON of fics, THIS is never one of the things Dick gets mad about or is a shit to him for, specifically? Almost as if....on some level....writers at least are AWARE that this is a shitty thing to joke about and DOESNT actually make Jason look all that good or like the innocent woobie victim of Dick’s, and that if they ever let Dick use that as a specific reason to go off on Jason, given how much a lot of ppl enshrine Jason’s thoughts about Catherine, this could backfire and make readers actually more sympathetic to Dick for what’s actually a really fucking shitty thing to say to an orphaned kid, even by another orphaned kid?

And like lol that won’t work, bc it’s not like they write that line cu they want ppl to be sympathetic to Dick, eww, no, it’s just because it was FUNNY, see, it’s a JOKE, about how his name is anachronistic and dumb and he only had it so ppl can laugh at him, not bc of like, the fact that he lit er a lly was not even ALLOWED to cling to a single other TANGIBLE reminder of his parents, that he’s still Dick Grayson because going by Dick, his parents’ preferred version of his name, is the one SINGLE thing no one else was ever able to FORCE him to give up or relinquish.

[ask-the-matsuno-neets]

By a terrible casuality, s/o finds a porn magazine among Matsuno belongins. And it's not even his! It's full of kinks that they never knew he was into! They got all red, shaking... The poor thing is a blush mess. When Matsuno enters in the room, how would he react? Bonus:"Didn't knew you were into this.... Matsuno-san..."

I've got two asks that are very similar, so I'm gonna answer them together if that's okay with you guys! I'll word it so it's like one day s/o finds on the Matsuno's brothers stashes, and then a few weeks later it's actually his they find ¯\(シ)/¯

I might put this under a cut because it gets very long very quick sksjsjsksj

*chugs coffee* LET'S GO

。

。

Magazine clattering to the ground, s/o turns to face Oso as he walks into the room. "H-hey fancy seeing you here ~" babe it's my house tf

Upon seeing the magazine, he'd initially freeze cus oh shit that's porn is it mi-

Then he'd snicker and point to it "Hey I think that's Ichimatsu's stash you got there-". Cue s/o going red.

Of course he'd be terrified at the thought that it had been his stash, but when it turns out that its not, he'll brush it off and laugh about it - adding in a cheeky "Hey where did you find that exactly, I need to know for, blackmail *cough* research purposes"

--

Strolling into the living room, Oso saw his s/o reading a magazine, cross-legged on the floor. Could have been a gossip magazine at that point for all he knew. Chuckling, he'd say "I hope that's not Ichi's stash again, don't want you mentally sca-"

He saw the cover and recognised it oh shit not this-

It was one of his this time.

He'd go over and gently pry it from their hands. "I don't think you want to be reading that s/o-". Imagine s/o just grabbing his shirt from behind like 'oh no you don't ~'

"Oh I don't, do I ? So you laugh at the other one but not this one, how peculiar~ Do you have maybe, an attachment to this one? You know, something like,,, it belongs to you~?" s/o would snicker. Oso would freeze momentarily, before darting upstairs to relocate his whole stash. "Not today, not any day, this is not a conversation I'm ready to have"

They might end up discussing it, but all it would boil down to is that Oso is stuck in his ways of the Virgin Neet, whether he has a s/o or not lmao

。

Karamatsu would scream. His beloved s/o was being mentally scarred by Choromatsu's stash. Bonus if his glasses just full on shatter at seeing that. He'd scream like that one shark puppet (you know the one) when his s/o asked him if he was really into all this idol and other,,, stuff. "NONONONONONO that's my brother's!! That's Choro's stash, you know him - he's the otaku of this family!!" he wouldn't even say buraza instead of brother, that's how serious(ly terrified) he'd be. Save him.

He'd also be quietly taking notes on the location though, just incase he ever had to get back at Choro for something,,I mean he's a sweetheart, but just incase because you know what brothers can be like, regardless of how nice they are ¯\(シ)/¯

--

A few weeks later, perhaps when going up to the roof together, he'd offer his s/o goes up first. His s/o goes up, he follows suit and suddenly bumps into their back as they stand frozen.

"S/o, are you okay my dar-" he'd follow their line of sight to his hastily hidden 'books'. He'd had to hide them haphazardly once and forgot to tidy them up clearly "- a-ah"

He couldn't even deny they were his, there was a glittery blue bookmark in one of them.

"s/o, I can explain-" he'd start rambling on and on, probably saying stuff like he was a sinful man, a guilt guy™

S/o would just deadpan and grab his cheeks, squishing them so he couldn't continue. "Look, Kara, you're a guy, so it's not something I'm surprised about. It's fine" he'd look relieved

"what I am surprised about though-" he'd feel instant dread again "- is your lack of finesse at hiding them, considering you have five brothers I'd have thought that you'd have that skill" s/o would chuckle at Kara going beetroot

。

Choromatsu would feel his legs almost leave from under him at the sight of his s/o kneeling next to one of those books.

He'd quickly go over and take it out of their sight. S/o would look up at Choro "H-hey sweetie, um I think I found one of your-" he'd stop them with a finger on their lips.

"You uh really shouldn't be reading these, they'll probably scar you. I'm concerned not only because this is porn, but mainly because this is actually Todo's. That's totally why I'm worried. It's Todomatsu's, and he's into some weird shit"

Mhm, he was worried because it was Totty's. Definitely not because he was scared that you might have found his. Not at allll~

--

Fast forward, and s/o is sat against the wall reading. Choro thinks nothing of it, and is sat across from them under the kotatsu. He looks up, and his s/o is looking at the book and,,, blushing ? But, isn't 'Orange' just a normal manga?

He'd quietly get up and look over the top of the 'book', only to find one of his *cough* idol magazines. He'd shriek.

"s-s/o! W-when did you, why are you, w-what the-" he'd die.

Just imagine s/o literally becoming the personification of ',:3c

"Ufufu, research purposes~ I'm done for now though, catch" Cue magazine incoming. He'd come back from the grave just to jump up and put it back behind the bookshelf.

His soul would leave his body immediately after. S/o, you just broke the poor frog

。

Ichimatsu would see his s/o with a magazine and freeze. And probably foam at the mouth. His soul would try and escape, but he'd stop it just long enough to literally leap and grab the magazine, not really caring who's it was but praying it wasn't his.

His s/o would likely be sat quietly wondering wth just happened, but would mumble "I didn't know you were into that-", which would cause Ichi to panic a little. Oh wait was it actually his?

Noticing it wasn't, he'd be relieved. He'd be worried again once he noticed a baseball sticker on there though - that's Jyushimatsu's.

"Oh, hah no no no, I'm not into this,,, this is Jyushimatsu's. You don't want to be reading that, my kitten. That stuff is weird and a tad dodgy on a lot of levels. As brothers we agree to not snoop or judge that much because otherwise we'd all need therapy" he'd laugh nervously, still recovering from the scare.

--

[continuing with the shitpost/teasing s/o trope because I love it now. These are sort of recations/sort of shitpost imagines]

Returning from the kitchen with a glass of water, imagine him just choking on the water as he sees s/o reading. Why, you may ask, it's just reading? Haha no, they found a certain magazine. That was definitely Ichimatsu's; it was by the cat food for christ sake, come on.

The magazine was quickly flung across the room. Ichi would be quietly going "nopenopenopenope-" under his breath. Not today not any day fU-

Glancing back at his s/o, somehow in the second he looked away, they had cat ears. They were teasing him are you actually serious rn s/o-

"I didn't know you were into that kind of stuff-" s/o makes cat paw gestures with their hands, becoming the ',:3c once again "-Ichinyatsu"

Ichi would uh probably low-key die a tad inside.

。

"Hey s/o, I'm her-" Jyushi would stop and go:

at the book in s/o's line of view. He'd dash and swoop in to get rid of it before he was exposed, quickly trying to distract them.

Woah wait hang on, maybe I won't be exposed -

It's Karamatsu-niisan's

"I didn't realise you were into all thi-" "It's Karamatsu-niisan's, not mine" his voice would be slightly quiter than usual, and he'd sound a bit more serious. "Oh, I see. Well, that's rather embarrassing for Kara then!" s/o would nervously laugh. Jyushi would take the laugh and use it to distract. "Haha yeah, silly nii-san! He should have hidden it properly if he didn't want anyone to read it~!"

--

Returning home from the park, him and s/o would head upstairs (yknow, cus they were probably playing baseball and needed to change Idk). However, at the top of the stairs was stuff from the attic.

Shouting from the attic, Matsuyo would say "there's some stuff down here that needs tidying later, you and your brothers can sort your stuff, like books and whatnot"

Books

Oh no she hasn't has she

Glancing at s/o, their face answered his question. Mom has totally just exposed them to the world hasn't she.

"I didn't know you were into this, Jyushi-"

His face would be a cross of the below:

"Ah. T-That's not mine that's uh I don't know but it's not mine" s/o would snicker at this.

"Who else has baseball stickers, Jyushibee?

Sjksjsks caught red handed. He'd sigh in defeat. "Okay fine they're mine, but there's no way in hell you're knowing anymore than what's on the cover" he'd kick them back into the bug encyclopedia as he goes to get out of his baseball uniform. He'd leave s/o with a lot of questions. Bonus if s/o actually had a flick through the magazine while he was changing, and decided to tease him. Honestly a power move, some real guts there

。

Seeing his s/o reading on the floor, he'd coo sweetly "Oh s/o, what are you reading~?"

Ask a dumb question, you can tell by looking at the cover that it was not a book he would like his pure s/o to be reading.

Tutting, he'd take the magazine from s/o.

"tut tut s/o, I don't think you want to be reading that vile stuff. You're too pure for that"

S/o would smirk. "Oh, so they're not yours then? Thought it could count as research" Totty would be fighting a blush.

"Oh no, not those. They're stupid eldest's. I emphasise 'stupid' because he clearly didn't hide them properly, amateur"

--

After coming back from a cafe date, the living room had been left a mess by Todomatsu's older brothers who'd clearly been fighting at some point this afternoon. Stuff was everywhere.

Reluctantly, they'd both try and tidy up a tad. There were books everywhere, since one of the bookshelves had fell down.

Wait, not that bookshelf. Any but that bookshelf

But s/o had already made it to the bookshelf, and they were about to push it back up again when they noticed exactly what Todo didn't want them to

"Oh hey Totty, are these yours? They've got a pink ribbon around them staying 'do not touc-',, oh dear" it had dawned on s/o by the time Totty had took the books and pushed the shelf back up.

。

。

Sksjksjsjs I was literally writing these for the whole day in between bits of homework lmao

I hope they're okay for both anons!

- Mod Yuki ✨

[user-mania]

Lawlight Fanfics

//Also these awesome fanfics are just my opinion, sorry if some of it wasn’t your cup of tea//

•Jealousy by: Spotofpaint 》 L and Light have settled into their new lives in the sleepy little upstate NY town. Now all that's left to do is live happilly ever after. That is...unless a woman tries to come between them. (Ch. 34/34)

[It’s really an awesome fanfic, L’s a very little bit OOC though. But never the less, still amazing. ’Cause it’s not all about Jealousy, and the story was more than that. It’s really great.]

• Transient Dreams by: AnotherLostSoul 》 L knows Light is using his love for him to manipulate him. L knows Light does not love him and will write his name down. L knows it will break his heart but he will do what he must to see Kira executed. L wishes he didn't know any of these things. He wishes his Transient dreams could come true. (Ch. 6/6)

[If you want to cry your tears out, if you want your heart clencing and somewhat knives piercing, and If you want someone to look at you—like you’re crazy, this fanfic is for you. All I can say is //kinda spoiler// <The Author is generous at the ending.>PS. I actually forgot I was only reading 6 Chapters XD That’s how long and good this fanfic is!]

•Love On A Tombstone (Sequel to The Last Name) by: A. David 》"I know this is hard for you. I know this isn't what we imagined, but-" "I'm not supposed to be here, Light." (Ch. 28/??)

[If you want an awesome fanfic, but the last update was August 2018, this is for you ;-; Also a Fun Fact, the Title of the Chapters are Song titles ♡ Also idk if my wig got snatched by the plot twist or I’m just dumb. Probably the latter. ]

•Putting It All Together by: Dotti55 》Now that Light and L are back in Japan and Light is on his way to becoming a member of the police force, all they need to do is put it all together in spite of all the outside pressures, will they succeed? Sequal to "Something to Think About". LightxL. (Ch. 45/45)

[Something to Think About (Ch. 5/5) are just L and Light’s Valentines Day—which contains both Fluff and Smut. Anyways, this is really awesome!! I remeber how many times my heart breaking here.]

•Into the Night by: Dottitt55 》After a three month separation, Light finds he has to go undercover to catch a killer, and once again be separated from L. L worries how far he will have to go to catch the killer. Sequel to "Putting it All Together". LightxL. (Ch. 30/30)

[Another Sequel where my Heart breaks 10× more than the last fanfic.]

•I Won’t Say by: angeltrap》Having found out L’s name, Light can finally have everything he wants: the world and, more importantly, L. Convincing L, however, turns out to be more difficult than killing him, especially with a house full of orphans to stir the soup. Christmas fluff balanced by a power struggle between the dynamic duo. (Ch. 16/16)

Warnings: Slash; consent issues; morally questionable actions and ideals; delightfully AU after the end of Yotsuba Arc. Oh, and fluff. Like, cotton candy all around. Grab your xylitol.

Written and originally published on FF net between Jan 2009 and Jan 2012; edited and re-published also on FF net in Jan 2017.

[I remember actually reading this for the first time, and I hate myself for getting bored on the start of the chapter, so I kinda didn’t read it. And month has passed and I tried looking for DN Lawlight fanfics again, I canme across this fanfic again and I was like “Mhh okay, Lets take another shot”—AND NOW THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVE FANFICTION.]

•I Want You To Believe In Me by: Kir Sirin 》 A kiss from L sends Light into thinking it's all just another game to get him to admit to being Kira. So he decides to play along. But what if L really finds himself falling? And what of Light? LightxL First fanfic. Complete. (Ch. 12/12)

[Idk why but this is on the top of my list, I really love and adore this fanfic. I guess it was somewhat special to me becauss this was the first DN fanfic that I read and somewhat made me cry (‘cus i’m a crybaby), the ending was okay, but still made me cry.]

•Friend or Foe by: Spotofpaint 》 Light and L struggle with their desire to defeat the other, but also at the same time long to be friends. Their conflicted emotions make for a complicated storyline and sometimes can inspire both humor and drama. Contains very mild romance. (Ch. 25/25)

[I freaking love this. Another one of Spotofpaint incredible fanfic. The perfect fanfic for those who wants Enemies to Friends.]

•Friend or Flame by: Spotofpaint 》 Light and L have escaped Japan and have started a new life in America. But their troubles are far from over. In this new land there are much more frightening things than mass murderers and death. After all, what could be more terrifying than feelings? (Ch. 27/27)

[Hmm. Enemies -> Friends. Friends -> ??. The sequel of Friend or Foe ;-)]

•Retribution of a Fallen God by: VampireGRose 》 Three years have past since Kira's downfall, and the Shinigami King wonders if his realm lacks entertainment. Light Yagami awakens in the Shinigami world and is given a choice: spend eternity in nothingness or become the king's champion and win back his name. But who must Light work beside to regain his freedom? (Ch. 21/21)

[I Definitely love this!! I'm so sad that the sequel isn't finish yet ;-;].

[lifeofnickripley]

Game of Thrones: Fav characters and characters I dislike

(Long post) Kay so, today is the premiere of the final season, guess I'll do my top Ten favorite characters(it is pretty much my favorite show of all time). Show only since I have yet to read the books. If you wonder my opinion on any character not mentioned I either forgot to mention them or I didn't think they really earned a spot on the lists. Yes I do censor things in this a bit buuut I want my web comic to have a wider audience so yea, deal with it. (SPOILER WARNING, at this point, if ur not caught up tho, you have only yourself to blame) Liked Honorable mentions: - Melisandre - before I found out bout the necklace, I had the HUGEST crush on her. She's evil, yes, but she adds a sense of wonder and magic to the show, so I still like her character (other than that necklace scene obviously). Plus Jon wouldn't be back if it weren't for her so haters gonna hate. - Bronn- if he doesn't get his damn castle...lol I doubt I need to say why this wise cracking sword for hire is a favorite, I think most people love him. - Yara Greyjoy - Badass pirate/Viking chick on the high seas? Hell yeah! Plus I love Greyjoy armor, I don't doubt Euron will probably kill her though. - Oberyn Martell - Awesome character, the Red Viper was fierce with a spear and even moreso with his attitude. Unfortunately his pride wound up being his undoing in the end, arguably one of the most effective deaths in the series. - Tormund Giantsbane - How can you not love this absolute bro? I don't even like Brienne and I ship them. Geniune badass. - Jorah Mormont - Lord of the Friend zone, his loyalty makes him one of my favs, not top ten tier though - Petyr Baelish: The events of Game of Thrones wouldn't have happened without this slimy bastard. He was smart and cunning (which made him fun to watch) and though his death was cool, the build up was kind of weak (weird Sansa/Arya storyline) Favorite characters: 10.) Ned Stark - Everyone's original favorite character, his death cemented that GOT wasn't f*ckin around. I mean, damn, still a brutal death scene to watch to this day. Props to Sean Bean for making his so awesome. He was honorable to a fault in a dishonorable world. 9.) Ramsey Bolton - Kay, so I might get some flack for this one, but he was a great bad guy. I mean he was legit terrifying and despicable! Made the Battle of the Bastards have an entirely different level of intensity than most of the battle scenes. Dude was an absolute monster, but unlike another widely disliked villain, this psycho got his own hands dirty instead of beckoning others to. His death scene was poetic but I kinda wanted it to be gorier. (I'm an edgelord though) 8.)Jon Snow - Awesome character, obviously I dig him, so why so low on the list? Honestly, there's characters I like more. But he's still really cool, definitely has the best fight scenes of any of the characters. WE BETTER SEE GHOST THIS SEASON THOUGH!! Lol things are gonna be hella awkward when he finds out Dany is his aunt, yet we still root for them as a couple...that's wincest for you hurr hurr hurr hurr (sorry) I could see him living in the end cus tbh killing him again would be repetitive BS. 7.)Tywin Lannister - Kay...so he died on the sh*tter (imo probably the worst place to die) AND he was an absolute d*ck to Tyrion...but dude, he was awesome. He literally has a song about him in the world of GOT that is used as a warning to others to not f*ck with him!! He took a house that was laughed at and turned it into one of the most feared houses in all of Westeros. That is pretty frickin cool. 6.) Cersei Lannister - Another one I'll get flack for but whatever lol She's cool! So what she shags her brother and is an awful human being? She's a badass! Did you SEE how she blew up all of her enemies in the court and solidified her queen status in one fell swoop? That was dope!! She's vile but very entertaining to watch. RIP the Tyrells. Probably gonna get choked out though by her brother like Maggie the frog predicted. (By my second favorite character no less) 5.) Daenerys Targaryen - Dany! One of my cats is named after her! I love this character. The dragons are amazing, she's cute, she's powerful, maybe a little insane cus of Targaryen madness, and she's overcome some amazing odds. Her storylines could be a little meh in the grand scheme of things but Emilia Clarke's portrayal has made a character that we really root for. I suspect she'll die personally by the Night King buuuuut we'll see. 4.)Tyrion Lannister -Tyrion's writing has gone down a bit in recent seasons but still, most people's favorite Lannister. His quick wit and resilience make him a solidified favorite. Still seems like the person you'd most wanna drink with. I'd be pretty damn surprised if he bit the dust. 3.) Arya Stark - My other cat is named after her and there's a good reason why, SHE'S BASICALLY BECOME A FREAKING FACE STEALING NINJA!!! She was always likeable and I think I've enjoyed almost every storyline she's been a part of (excluding her main one last season) Maisie Williams is a great actress and I hope to see more of her in the future. I doubt Arya will die, but based on that one trailer, things do seem rather bleak for her. Who knows...maybe GRRM wants a divorce... 2.) Jaime Lannister - Yes. This dude is my favorite Lannister. In case you couldn't tell, Lannister is my favorite house. He's really had the best redemption arc in the series. He went from a character I disliked to my second favorite. I predict he will be the one to kill his sister, what happens to him after that, idk. It'll be awkward when he meets Bran again though... 1.) The Hound (Sandor Clegane) - CLEGANEBOWL BETTER HAPPEN!! Kay so... admittedly I screamed like a little freaking girl when this character came back. He... HE'S JUST SO FREAKING COOL!! Admittedly being a 6 footer and a rather grumpy individual, I probably relate to him more than I'd like to admit. Probably will die, but as long as he fights his brother, I'll be a very happy edgelord. Characters I dislike: 10.) Sansa Stark - Kay so I just...I dislike her, I never liked her. I feel sorry for her, sure. She's gotten better over time, sure. I still see her as very entitled and kinda whiny/bratty. She'll probably die. If not I won't be disappointed, still though, not a fan of Sansa. It was cool how she killed Ramsey, tho again, do wish the scene was gorier. 9.) Robb Stark - Ned Stark 2.0 but way less cool. Nuff said. I was okay with his death in the Red Wedding. Shouldn't have made a promise you weren't gonna commit to. Even if Walder Frey is a d*ck. 8.) Catelyn Stark - She was just such a jerk to Jon Snow and Tyrion, seriously. Even moreso in the books from what I have read of them. She got on my nerves. Honestly, I don't feel like Lady Stoneheart would've added much in terms of storyline. 7.) Brienne of Tarth: I find her annoying. Sure, her fight with the hound was FREAKING COOL, but she's kinda too self righteous for her own good. Duty is her thing and all but she is really not good at holding up to her vows. Still ship her and Tormund though. 6.) Theon Greyjoy - hated this dude, then felt sorry for him, now I roll my eyes at him. Honestly, Greyjoys other than Yara are pretty meh characters. Good for him finally regaining figurative cajones. Doubt he'll save his sister though, or survive the White Walkers for that matter. 5.) Euron Greyjoy - this one is a shame cus I hear the book character is amazing. Feels like a pretty generic bad guy of the week type for a show with outstanding villains. Funny like here or there, but kinda a weak character overall. Theon will probably kill him, though I'd love to see a twist where he kills Theon. 4.) Walder Frey - Old dude that got what was coming to him, props to the guy who plays Filch, portrayed two characters who were absolutely despicable. I doubt I really have to list the ways this cowardly character was despicable. Awesome death scene though. Winter came for House Frey. 3.) Shae - Grrrr. The actual actress I feel very sorry for cus I've heard her story, but man this character. Dumb but smart enough to screw over Tyrion. For personal reasons, I really hate this character, reminds me of people I've known. 2.) Tommen and Myrcella Baratheon - Most. Useless. Lannisters. Ever. I'm a Lannister fan so you could see why I roll my eyes so hard with these two. Tommen rolled over so hard you might as well have called him a wheel. And Myrcella was just kinda there, admittedly sad to watch her death scene though (pretty much moreso because it was the only time Jaime was really able to connect with his daughter) 1.) Joffrey Baratheon - Everyone probably saw this coming. Joffrey is that kid on the playground that'd hit you, you'd hit back, they'd start crying and get you in trouble. Everybody knew that kid, I think that's why everyone hates this character so. But man, his death scene was soooo satisfying. Props to the Jack Gleason for making him so horrible. There ya have it. My opinions on GOT characters. Freaking excited for tonight's premiere!! WINTER IS HERE!!

[sublimekiss]

I was tagged by @lineesa ty! you’re lovely!!

☀️LAST☀️

drink: dr pepper bc im unhealthy as hell :/

text message: nsjsjsjsjdn NJsjwns (?? idk i keyboard smash too much??)

phone call: w/ my crush ;))

song you listened to: spotlight - lil peep

time you cried: pffff abt thirty minutes ago bc i sewed my pillowcase shut on accident

☀️HAVE YOU EVER☀️

dated someone twice: yes bc i make v bad decisions in relationships

kissed someone and regretted it: hhhh yeah like most of them tbh

lost someone special: my brother, n recently gus (a music artist) n i still cry every time his songs come on

been depressed: hmm yes lol

been drunk and thrown up: nope, i rarely puke cus it’s nASTY n i can actually control it p well

☀️IN THE PAST YEAR HAVE YOU☀️

made a new friend: yes!! her name is cait n i lov!!

fallen out of love: not romantically but platonically

met someone who changed you: hmm i don’t think so

found out who ur true friends are: considering i only have like,,,, 2 friends now, id say ya

found out someone was talking about you: nope

☀️GENERAL☀️

how many people on tumblr do you know in real life?: like 7

do you have any pets?: two cats n a ROCK :)

do you want to change your name?: ya i rlly hate my biological name

what time did you wake up this morning?: 7am bc thts what time i get up everyday for school

what were you doing last night?: uhh i cooked dinner n then finished 2 books tht ive been ignoring for like a month

something you cannot wait for: my birthday this yr so i can move out of the hellhole of where i live n get away from everyone in it :)

have you ever talked to a person named tom?: one of my old roommates was named tom so yuh

what’s getting on your nerves right now: my calculus teacher cus he’s an arrogant arsehole

blood type: youd think id know bc the all the surgeries but nope :/

nickname: maddi lou, maddi, mad, madelyn but thts not rlly shorter, n my cousins call me madburger bc they’re strange but not many other nicknames

relationship status: single

zodiac sign: taurus

pronouns: she/ her

favorite show: uhh honestly idk, maybe the great british baking show or supernatural

college: probably won’t make it to college tbh

hair color: light brown currently

do you have a crush on someone: ughhghghgh yes n i HATE IT

something you like about yourself: my ability to not blurt stuff out anymore so not many ppl kno that many personal things abt me so im more mysterious ;))

☀️FIRSTS☀️

first surgery: in august 2014

first piercing: earrings n when i was like 2

first sport you joined: football

first vacation: idk if it’s a vacation but i go to canterbury, uk every summer to see my family

first pair of sneakers: uhh idk but the first ones i remember are a pair of pink n black airwalks

☀️RIGHT NOW☀️

eating: nothing cus im currently in calc

i’m about to: go to sleep n possibly (hopefully) piss my teacher off

listening to: spotlight on repeat bc the music video came out today n im obsessed w it

want kids: uhh idk i think im a bit young to even imagine it

get married: idk

career: i originally wanted to be a psychiatrist or a librarian but they both require a bit of college n im barely getting thru high school rn

☀️WHICH IS BETTER☀️

lips or eyes: eyes 10/10

hugs or kisses: depends on the person

shorter or taller: i like tall ppl cus ?? they tend to be nice?? idk if it’s jus cus it’s the ones ive met but every tall person ive met has been rlly nice n chill, n honestly it’s the short ppl who make fun of me for being short than actual tall ppl

troublemaker or hesitant: idk if this is what r u or what do u like better, but im more of a trouble maker bc im sUPER impulsive n end up making rlly shitty decisions but i like hesitant ppl more bc they’re probably less likely to do dumb shit/ prevent me from doin dumb shit

older or younger: idc much abt age as long as they’re mature enough to hold a decent convo w/

romantic or spontaneous: romantic for sure, i LOVE lil sweet gestures even tho i haven’t been the reciprocate of much. like my friend bought me flowers the other day n i literally took abt an hr to process it n when i did i SOBBED

sensitive or loud: uhh sensitive maybe? loud ppl give me anxiety so no

hookup or relationship: relationship bc im tired of hooking up

☀️HAVE YOU EVER☀️

kissed a stranger: depends on what qualifies as a stranger

drank hard liquor: yuh

lost contacts/glasses: not rlly bc i never use my glasses

sex on first date: uhh no

broken someone’s heart: hopefully @ one specific person but i hope no one else

been arrested: hmm yes

turned someone down: yeah

☀️DO YOU BELIEVE☀️

in yourself: ha no

in miracles: yeah

in love at first sight: i used to but not anymore

i tag: anyone who wants to do it :))

[survivor-guyana]

Episode 5 - "Another day, another swap." - Jess

Sarah was robbed.

Please tribe swap, please tribe swap.

Not really sure how to feel at this stage...

Jess absolutely botched this challenge for us, and it was probably the worst individual effort in a competition that I have seen in years. For that, she automatically created a target on her back.

HOWEVER, I need to control who goes here, and it won't be Jess. It sounds like Dani and Nick were on opposite sides of the joint tribal, and will likely target one another.

I would personally like to see Alyssa go sooner than later, but there is no context in taking her out right now. She is "Hosororo strong" apparently, but the tables have turned. I'm not sure if I am willing to give her the same mercy that the favs gave us.

Honestly I wouldn't mind losing this so Mitchell goes home but then again I wouldn't mind Arakaka going to tribal either. I also feel like Nick is fucked over at Takama. He has the idol but that'd require someone using it on him which I doubt would happen. He better up his social game! If Arakaka goes to tribal then it should obviously be Aidan bc of his advantage and bc of Jones, Sammy, and Chelsea/JD alliance. Wait is Chelsea a fan? Lol idk.

So Ive been talking to Maynor and TJ individually about having an alliance of us 3 since I put them both high on my list! They both agreed and so I formed the alliance called... JONES'S ANGELS! I feel like we're gonna be a good alliance as well. Oh José is on our tribe as well as Mitchell. José is someone that I talked to the least on our OG tribe and from the looks of the trust list, someone who is not very trusted. Mitchell has his karma coming from the joint tribal round and for voting out Sarah. (PSST Sarah I miss u queen I can't wait to see you in Survivor Michigan.)

Another day, another swap. I've officially been on EVERY single tribe now. I am Guyana's Orphan. Honestly, I'm actually okay with how we swapped this time around.

I'm in the majority both in several ways. 1. I'm in the majority if Devon and I decide to stick with the "Fans" (barf). 2. I'm in the majority if we decide to go to Hosororo Way (yassss bitch) 3. I'm in the majority if Favourites attempt something (meh).

BUT this bitch is literally her OWN ENEMY RIGHT NOW. I flopped that memory competition harder a nerd at Comic Con trying to talk to a female. YIKES. I hope the flu isn't what sends me home or else I'm going to FUCKING RAGE.

I was able to re-connect with Dani which was okay? for me? I guess? Honestly at this point I have no loyalty to the Fans tribe (I don't think I ever had any tbh). I don't think a label in front of someone's name should stop me from trying to further my game. That being SAID....

Nick is on A WHOLE NOTHER' LEVEL Y'ALL. This man literally knew me for 5 seconds and spilled his whole game. I expected more from a dude who owns a buff personally. The only thing he didn't tell me last night was his social insurance number. I kind of feel bad for him but I don't want to let him get far. I rather keep Dani around than him at this point. I don't want that to hurt my relationship with Alyssa so.. I AM STRESSING RIGHT NOW.

Speaking of Alyssa...

MY GIRL ALYSSA GETTING FIRST.. fucking SCARES ME SHITLESS. I would honestly consider her my #1 at this point but now this has me thinking.. am I really HER number 1? Does she have the same relationship with me like she has with others? If we merge does she have my back over people like Jones/JD who she speaks HIGHLY of to me? I have my doubts but I think having someone like her on my side in this crucial time is an ASSET. She is VULNERABLE and I need to make sure I make her feel as fucking comfortable as possible. It's times like these where those strong relationships form and I honestly think if we can possibly

That's my bitch, that's my girl. I honestly think Alyssa is my gate-way drug to the Favourites at this point. I also really just want to meet Jones because I'm convinced she's my future best friend.

Something I haven't touched on.... ever BUT I can't wait to possibly re-connect with TJ. I miss being able to strategize with him. The way he sees games is insane and I have a half of a brain cell so it's always nice to have a smart person do the thinking for you.

I NEED TO FIND A FUCKING ADVANTAGE OR A GOD DAMN IDOL.

I cant believe we won immunity. I was really scared that we would have to go to tribal. Me, TJ, and Tim made an alliance called Jones’s Angels and i cant wait to be reunited with Jones. Mitchell is acting like last vote wasnt against me but it was like. How can you say theres 100% trust when there isnt. The Jenna vote was not  as much of a suprise for Mitchell cuz i mentioned my worries about Jenna. Im being buddy buddy but if we lost next round. He is going home for sure. Once you brake my trust, you cant really get it back. Sorry mitchell buddy. And i have eyes on Aidan and Dani. Karma for Sarah is coming.

WOW! That's all I have to say right now. This game is really putting me through the ringer but I'm in it to win it and this fucking tribe swap threw me for a loop. I knew the trust lists would come into play but I didn't know right away. But I sort of made such a power move on my tribe and then got shuffled into this and I saw the numbers and went FUCK.

Like four favorites versus little old me! But I like a challenge... I'm not Sarah, I'm not going to let myself get swapfucked. *gives the camera a shady look*

Having the Opal Idol in my pocket is amazing and I'm glad I went for that temptation. Everyone knows I have it but honestly I think there's an advantage to standing out. I feel like this series is used to a lot of UTR, lowkey players and people lying low and that's just not my thing... I honestly can't lay low to save my life. So my plan is to go after them. Honestly since I was low on the trust list it makes sense to go after people high on the trust list. I'm honestly not that bitter but if I can use it to justify targeting some people, I'm going to do it.

I'm not sure of my tribe because everybody is meh so far? I don't know if I'm dry or they're just all in alliances but I can't get a read on them for shit. I saw how well they all did in their past games and JD is giving me this loner act but she's been to an FTC so I know she's not as dumb as she's letting on. For some reason the fact that there are more girls than guys concerns me because I feel like those bitches could link up?

I guess I like Chelsea the best but maybe that's because she seems a little more exciting. Sammy does too but he seems like a game threat. I think I'm reluctant to share anything with anyone because I'm not sure of their relationships with each other. I think I want Jonesy out though... she has this cutesy act that is relatable and did pretty well on her first season. She was high on the trustlist too.

In all... I feel isolated but not intimidated.

Nobody has asked about the temptation but I'm ready to lie about it being a vote steal like I told Dani and Mitchell. I need to start keeping my lies in order because they're going to be PISSED when I reveal what it really is but hopefully they understand... if I ever see them again. I'm worried about Dani AND Jess over there at Takama because Devon is crafty. They are some people I hope I can rekindle with at merge. I'd consider working with Maynor but he seems like the type to want revenge.

WE WINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN fuck yeah also i wanna elaborate on something i said in my last confessional about using Aidan as a shield bc idk if I ever explained that Aidan has proclaimed that his tribe did not trust him at all, AND he has an advantage, right? so obviously, people would want to vote him out because of it. HOWEVER, if I get him to trust me/on my side, not only can we work together, BUT everyone will always target him over myself, so yeah, logic ;)

Unfortunately we didn't lose and just as I feared Nick's tribe lost. Welp you had a good run Nick.

So this round has been messed up.  I was swapped to a tribe with 1 person I talked to breifly on our original tribe and had an alliance with to search for idols.  The other 3 players were all people I never spoke to.  Furthermore Dani even voted vote for a few tribals ago.  After a botched challenge I’m hoping that it’s going to be Dani tonight and not me.  I’ve spoken with Jess and Devon and get good vibes that they want to play together.  Let’s hope their not playing me.

So pretty much I’ve been able to establish a strong relationship with Maynor this game... now I just need a majoritu on this tribe to be able to cause some damage within the merge, so we’ll see how things go when I reach that phase 😤 I want to work with TJ tbh, but we’ll see how that goes I guess haha

Ugh I hope Jess and devon aren’t ducking with me but I think it’s me or nick. Really hoping it’s nick. Sorry for typos drubk

Ummmm, so what did i do? Nothing, what have I done? Nothing, I didnt do the challenge ether cus like, wow I do not have a shity memory. But we won so yay team! 

[baconpal]

since ive been complaining about shit already tonight i might aswell just mention random crap that i’ve been thinking about, but ill spare your dash, feel free to read me rambling about absolutely random shit if you want

first some video game stuff i guess;

the good: I don’t have a switch and still definitely cannont justify getting one yet but woo boy does ARMS look good, i wanna try it, and also splatoon 2, i really liked splats when it was first out, and martyo kart, but its p spensive stuff and im a cheap-ass 

the new thing code vein thing is simultaneous promising and incredibly boring to me, cus anime styled action game with the potential for cute girls to be wielding giant fucking weapons is like, my dream, and the boss designs looked pretty good, if a bit unrelated in the trailer, like the moose knight dude is fucking sick and i wanna use his armor, but then there’s also like, abyssal spear lady miku whose fucking cute, and they’re shown right after each other and it becomes a bit hard to follow, and the story seems to be just fucking dark souls “wah we go hollow and the world is a fuck”, i wish it wasnt that, cus dark souls alone made that setting overused, and while a modern-ish universe certainly sounds nice, it looks fucking bleak and they spend half the video in places that just look like bluer versions of DaS3 areas

the bad: so ive already complained about momodora 4, some people like it for some fucking reason but i dont, and now 5 is happening because they cant just make a new fucking series i guess, and it looks awful, like honestly horrid, its fucking shitty 3d when nobody asked for it, and it’s like, all the worst parts of something like dark souls, and none of the good parts and it angers me to no end that they keep dragging this sorta cute and okay free game series into the mud like this when they could make new games and try new things

the ugly: i never funded or thought about supporting indivisible because i had zero fun with the demo and i never really cared for any of the designs other than the redesigns of other characters from other games, and maybe the big fist girl, who didnt really fit in the style to begin with, but now they’re going and doing major redesigns and model updates that just look stupid and lifeless, like “wah wah diversity” drama aside, that cowboy guy went from a gritty, perfectly decent design to like, fucking nothing, he’s nothing now, i cant even identify him as something because he’s just nothing, and the entire cast seems to have been stretched up for no reason, and now a lot of the interestingly wide characters arent very interesting anymore, im not mad about it cus i never planned on getting it, but as an artist when i see artists take a very solid and nice character/design and just make it fucking awful, it makes me mad, especially cus i’ve seen some artists i used to know do it too, not starting drama or something it just seems pretty dumb to take things that are nice and people like and make them into different things when you could just make a new thing and have both

also uh like my friend showed me this jap band called uplift spice and at first i thought they were meh but i cant stop listening to them now its fucken cute rock stuff and it kills me

now art stuff. these are the things i really wanna talk about but they’re really just me problems so if you’ve already made it this far maybe you’ll care about this random shit

so like commissions have gone decently recently, not complaining about nobody wantin em or something, but for the longest time i’ve had people ask me about commissions, ask if there’s slots open or something, or even straight up say they intend to commission me, and then i’ll never fucking hear from them ever again ever, and like, if you just ask “hey got slots?” doesnt mean i expect you to actually get a comm, but it usually suggests there will atleast be a follow up response like “okay thanks but nevermind” or “ok cool ill be contacting you soon” and then actually following up on it, cus without any closure i just get stressed out thinking about why they never get back to me, are the prices too much? are they worried i won’t accept the comm? did they fucking forget i exist? did they get hit by a car? like even if you fucking told me “nevermind i dont want a comm you’re fucking SMELLY and i HATE YOU” i’d feel better cus at least i wouldnt worry about it for a week or something, none of the people reading this are likely the kinds of people who do this, most of them dont even follow me, but cmon man why you gotta make me worry about this shit

and last thing probably (hopefully jesus what am i even typing all this for) so like now that i’m doin comms more to support my own ass i’m really not pushing for requests in my inbox since a lot of them i’d never do anyway unless i got paid, but at the same time, i really liked drawin the ghost lady for that one ask, cus nobody is ever going to comm me for my own characters unless your one of my super good friends and youre just looking for an excuse to give me money, if you DID honestly comm me my OCs i’d fucking love you that’d be sick, but regardless i think that the only requests ill end up doing anymore are cute megalo1 and 2 ideas or stuff of my OCs, but i dont even know if you guys remember or like any of them, i actually have way more of them than i post because i like to design for fun sometimes, but like other than maybe neon idk if any of my OCs are know to any of my followers other than good friends, so idk if you guys would even care enough to request my OCs, but they’re mine and they make me happy so if you wanna see more of them or ask questions about them or anything, feel free to send me asks or messages or whatever, it’d be cool

so ye that’s all the shit im thinken about right now, if you actually could read all that you’re fucking weird and i like you

[soulmatesjjp]

70 Questions

Thank you @pinkhoodiemark for tagging me in this. I usually get so lazy to do challenges and this one was soooooo long but it’s kinda nice to reflect on some of these ☺️ also I’m pretty sure Emili has tagged me in at least one other challenge before and I wanna fulfill at least one thing she tags me in ✨

this is pretty long so if you really wanna get to know me you can read more under the cut

1. do you have a good relationship with your parents? it’s 50/50 we have our good moments and our very bad moments but sadly, even tho I’m an adult now, things haven’t changed.

2. who did you last say “i love you” to? my pets are pretty much the only ones I’m comfortable saying ‘i love you’ to. I say it to my cat Cloud the most.

3. do you regret anything?

Yes, lots of personal things. Lately I regret my major and not putting more effort in college.

4. are you insecure?

Like everyone I have insecurities but I try not to dwell on them or let them affect me cus I know that they’re insignificant and not worth it. Doesn’t mean I don’t think of them from time to time.

5. what’s your relationship status?

Very single, mostly because I’m not comfortable opening up to people and I’m still kinda struggling with my ‘identity’

6. how do you want to die? the most painless way possible? i don’t...really think about how i wanna die tbh

7. what did you last eat? some store bought chocolate cake I’ve been eating almost everyday 😬 I really need to stop, it’s not healthy

8. played any sports? no, never. i am very very unathletic. idk how i ever managed to run those 12 min miles in high school

9. do you bite your nails? not now but i did a lot as a little kid

10. when was your last physical fight? i’m not much of a fighter but most likely it was a fight with my sister or maybe my mom (don’t worry it wasn’t too rough) years ago

11. do you like someone?

define ‘like’

12. have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

i don’t think so, i think maybe 36 hours would be my limit

13. do you hate anyone at the moment? at the moment no, though I usually don’t feel hate towards people

14. do you miss someone?

i miss the company of someones

15. have any pets?

i have two cats, Maxx (an old lady) and Cloud (my soon to be 3 year old bby) and my sister has a yorkie Oakley (a terrorizer who won’t leave me alone) but since she’s hardly ever home and I’m always taking care of him he’s practically mine

16. how exactly are you feeling at the moment? i feel like I probably sound like a robot throughout all this, sorry I can’t express emotion unless it’s in all caps

17. ever made out in the bathroom? nope 

18. are you scared of spiders? regular daddy long legs are fine but anything bigger than that get it away from me

19. would you go back in time if you were given the chance? I want to say yes because there are things I really really regret that especially affect other ppl but I feel like what’s in the past is in the past and I probably shouldn’t mess with it

20. where was the last place you snogged someone? no comment

21. what are your plans for this weekend? no plans!! my life is so boring since a bunch of my friends joined the military and moved away and some of my college friends have moved on with their life and I hardly see them anymore 😭 (i still have friends they’re just as boring as me)

22. do you want to have kids? how many? not really, i kinda fear having a tiny human growing inside me and giving birth to it. i think if i ever were to have children I’d rather adopt but even that sounds like a big commitment I might never be ready for

23. do you have piercings? how many? my ears have been pierced since I was a baby and I haven’t worn earrings in over 10 years but the holes never filled in

24. what is/are/were your best subject(s)? I was always good at english cus I was good at reading and bullshitting essays

25. do you miss anyone from your past? man, ok there was this one guy/friend who I always clicked with and we were kinda on and off for years but never dated and I haven’t seen him in a few years and I’ve kinda moved on but I still think about him cus we live in the same town and he has a really common face so so many guys I see look like him

26. what are you craving right now? guidance? an epiphany? motivation?

27. have you ever broken someone’s heart? maybe? I don’t know I would really say I broke their heart maybe not that severe...it wasn’t my fault ok I never lead anyone on

28. have you ever been cheated on? Nope.

29. have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? nope.

30. what’s irritating you right now? the fact that I finally found an installation of photoshop that works but I can’t download it because apple sucks and won’t let me download apps unless it’s from the apple store/one of their developers!!!! 😤😤😤 I refuse to pay a monthly fee for photoshop that’s ridiculous I’m not made of money.

31. does somebody love you? 2 of my pets love me for sure

32. what is your favourite color? Blue

33. do you have trust issues? Probably I don’t fully trust people easily but I’m still friendly with them

34. who/what was your last dream about? I honestly don’t remember I wish I did

35. who was the last person you cried in front of? oh man I cried at work on Valentine’s Day cus we were unexpectedly crazy busy (you can’t even understand how busy) and it was just really stressful for me cus it was only me and another girl handling customer service and she got to leave early (she was a champ idk how she kept a smile on her face even when she left) and there was this especially rude lady I was on the phone with who just wouldn’t stop talking and pretty much blaming me so when the call ended I ducked down behind the counter and cried a little from all the stress (that lady was just the final straw) and I’m sure most if not all my co-workers saw

36. do you give out second chances too easily? I think so cus I don’t really hold grudges I’m too soft that way, but no one’s ever fucked up so bad they really needed a second chance with me

37. is it easier to forgive or forget? for me it’s easier to forgive cus like I said I can’t hold grudges for longer than a day.

38. is this year the best year of your life? definitely not I need to figure lots of things out and do some stuff to get my life on track

39. how old were you when you had your first kiss? i’m pretty sure I kissed dumb boys when I was a little kid but after that I think I was 18

40. have you ever walked outside completely naked?

hell no

51. favourite food?

i love all kinds of food: tacos, tortas, french fries, birria, fishcake, bulgogi, bulgogi fries, actual good ramen. I can’t name just one fave

52. do you believe everything happens for a reason? I used to think that saying was so stupid but lately the way I’ve seen some things happen I’m starting to believe a little in fate

53. what is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? watched Brooklyn nine nine

54. is cheating ever okay? NO NEVER, unless you’re cheating on some dumb high school quiz I mean it’s not really ok but I won’t judge you

55. are you mean? I think I can definitely be both nice and an asshole to the same people and I’m sorry...

56. how many people have you fist fought? my siblings when I was a kid so 2

57. do you believe in true love? i believe most of us might never get to experience it but there are a lucky few who get to feel it

58. favourite weather? california autumn/winter cus it’s cold but not really freezing

59. do you like the snow? no it’s cold and wet, no thanks

60. do you wanna get married? eh not really

61. is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? asdfgh I don’t think I’d like any nickname like that

62. what makes you happy? good food, good company, cuddling with my pets, casually hanging out with my friends, and both got7 and monsta x especially their variety shows

63. would you change your name?

never, I like my name  

64. would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

I can’t even remember the last person I kissed so idk

65. your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Try to politely reject them and pretend it never happened so we can continue being friends. Maybe keep my distance from him to give him time to get over it but make sure he knows we’re still friends. And maybe not hang out with him one on one for a while.

66. do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? yeah, most of my friends are guys and I can be myself around them but I don’t tell them everything about me

67. who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? my brother

68. who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? I don’t remember but it must have been during one of the occasions I was drunk and in college and opened up to one of my friends and we probably got really personal.

69. do you believe in soulmates? JJP ARE SOULMATES!!! they don’t have to ever get together but you can’t learn about their history and tell me they’re not soulmates (at least platonically) but honestly I strongly believe a strong force like fate brought all of got7 from 4 different countries together. So many trainees get switched around from company to company and either never debut or it takes them 7+ years but with GOT7 they debuted under their first company and their average training period lasted around 3 years. BamBam almost didn’t debut with them because JYP thought he was too young until YG’s show did an episode at JYPE. Youngjae would have never debuted if he didn’t practice and practice and continue auditioning for JYP. I could go on and on but in the end I truly believe jjp are soulmates and got7 are soulmates.

70. is there anyone you would die for? um idk maybe my family and pets but don’t hold me to that

I feel like a lot of my mutuals aren’t really on tumblr any more :// so I’ll tag a few who are still active @katbeom @yubgam @husbandsjjp (I haven’t seen you around in a while either!!)

[equalstrashflavoredtrash]

I was tagged by @beautifulramblingbrains and I'm snowed in and bored

Are you named after anyone? Yes after an ancestor who was the first wife and true love of Sameul who was a very successful lawyer and on shelter island there is a church he commisoned to be built. Theres three stained glass windows he had made special memorials for his first and second wife and his sister, the largest of the three is prominently dedicated to Hannah, his true love (he only remarried cus he wanted a son). While at a funeral for her aunt my mom was sitting in the church looking at the window and decided if she ever had a daughter shed name her Hannah and a year later I showed up. (I would've been Samuel if I was a boy)

When was the last time you cried? Uhh not sure I cry a lot are really stupid things. It was prolly a sentimental xmas commercial

Do you have kids? Nope

If you were another person, would you be a friend of yourself? Yeah I think so, I'm pretty easy going so id prolly just chill with myself and watch obscure movies

Do you use sarcasm a lot? Yes but I really only make dumb jokes

What’s the first thing you notice about people? I have face blindness so when I see or meet someone I look for a distinguishing characteristic I can use to identify them later. (I really like people with bright hair or crazy outfits cus they're easy for me to recognize. I do not like people in uniforms like at the store, like when everyone's got khakis and a blue polo and I have to pick one out from the crowd?)

What is your eye color? Blue-gray. Bean tells me my eyes look like storm clouds over the ocean which makes me feel like the protagonist in some dystopian YA novel.

Scary movie or happy endings? I'm easy baby, I'll go either way! What I really love is inconclusive endings tho...

Favorite smells? Vanilla And woodsmoke

What’s the furthest you’ve ever been from home? To the west, cali and to the east Germany. Idk which is further away, they're kinda eqidistance

Do you have any special talents? I can draw, like pretty well. I don't talk abt my art here so I always forget that people don't know I went to art school and have a bfa in illustration. (I did my time)

Where were you born? Maine medical center

What are your hobbies? I watch a lot of movies, some might say too many.

Do you have any pets? Sooty cat, Dempsey-doodle and Monday the Poodle

Do you have any siblings? Yup, older bro (and like 4 surrogate brothers by proxy thru him)

What do you want to be when you grow up? Happy

Who was your first best friend? That I can remember? Her name is Darcy. We are still friends on fb, tho we never talk. She just got married and her wife is beautiful and they look so happy.

How tall are you? 5'4" (tall enough that people don't call me short, but still short enough that I can't reach the top shelf half the time)

Funniest moment throughout School? Once the model didn't show up for life drawing so the teacher had us take turns posing. It was an 8 am class and I had been up all night so when it was my turn I sat in the chair and promptly fell asleep. When the teacher called that the 15 min were up I didn't respond. Realizing that i was dead asleep the teacher made everyone do a 45 min drawing cus I was staying perfectly still. I slept thru an hour of class, they woke me up when it was time for break.

How many countries have you visited? Sweden, France, Iceland, Canada, Germany

What was your favorite/worst subject in homeschool? Best was always art and language arts, worst were chem and physics

What is your Favorite drink? Animal? Perfume? A glass of ice water. Tigers and sheep. I don't know, I don't own or wear perfume...

What would you (or have you) name your children? Aloysius, Alice, Pin or Hayde

What Sports do you play/Have you played? I did a lot of sports in school, swim team, field hokey, lacrosse and hated all of them. I was more into geography and chess club. I really loved av club

Who are some of your favorite YouTubers? I have a lot... tho off the top of my head id say Ask a Mortician, Only in Japan, Albinowonderland, Brutalmoose, Rachel and Jun, Sailor J, and Jessica Kellgren-Fozard

How many Girlfriends/Boyfriends have you had? One

Favorite memory from childhood? Oh I don't know? One of my oldest memories is of watching Bandit, our three-legged cat climb a tree

How would you describe your fashion sense? At work, comfy clothes I can move around easily in and won't get caught in machines. Outside of work? Dresses and leggings (like, i don't even own a pair of jeans)

What phone do you have? (iOS v Android?) Galaxy 8 (Samsung droid)

Tell us one of your bad habits! Now that it's winter, gnawing on my dried lips. they're bloody and sore but still I must bite!!

Tagging: @frecklefaceb @peaky-yamyam @ariwolff14 @singingpeople (If you do this can you create your own post and tag me as I don’t want a million notifications. Learnt from my own mistake.)

[blurrybenzoboy]

cw talk of EDNOS/fucked body image then like idek general suicidal thoughts and socital collapse Lol cannot figure out read more soz but legit this blog is 5 years ago who follows it  .... eurgh just tried jeans on that were tight af in January expecting them to not fit at all but they were slightly lose which seemed really dramatic. It’s not it’s just.. idk if shit will ever change in my head, fat is like a state of mind not a tangiblelook/tangible measurement of size.. and that doesn’t have to be the worst omg I'd rather die than struggle with this forever type feeling at all like..but.. the fuck is the point legit know tangible measurements numbers blah blah fuck off but I know and now am starting to question if regardless that information even means shit, what if the scale is legitimately a significant amount just off/broken... what if my fucking jeans can lie to me.. ok lol I wrote the jeans bit and yeah that’s ridiculous, this is ridiculous, just does it matter in a sense of im finding elaborate excuses to not eat cus I can’t go ‘well I’m a fat prick I’m not gonna starve to death’ every single time eventually I challenge it and I don’t wanna I just wanna...... not be fat lol but I don’t think it matters even if I changed size for whatever the fuck is ‘the better’ I guess my head just wants me to be smaller and like lol ok ye not saying I am healthy but I wouldn’t be at what is define by multiple different health standards (tried to find better than bmi and it just seemed wildly off for gender differences, where tf do I go with that when I’m trans, ‘at 6 months on t u can consume a single unit more alcohol and the male calorie reccomendation’ doesn’t help at all god even as it’s own thing its bs ffs. But ye just feels like I’ll always have shit body image and that’s like... well this possibly not brilliant behaviour won’t intrinsically change what it wants to anyway so why fucking bother but I can’t be bother with this anymore like urghhhhh fuck off cannot find how to do ‘read more’ do excuse me in my geriatric state of 27 if you accidentally stumbled across it or know me or god idek. lol (that’s what early 20s me thought of 27 I guess I intended to kms at 27 so relatively god how ancient xoxo like on my birthday I just...stopped caring about late 20s being older... only so many years u can pass past 21 and be like I’ve not made it yet shit shit shit I am running outta time... I’m not gonna make it however I wanted to I’m not gonna make much more of myself than this lol or at least doesn’t feel possible anymore.. society is falling apart, life is bullshit, there’s a pandemic, I’m legit just getting mentally more distressed just in different ways as I age yeet man don’t wanna wait this out too long... I wish I could just end it for the 27 club as a vacuous reason alone but I can’t lol guess I just gotta wait round for death and societal collapse, god can’t wait for things to get even more fucking dire, how much better can they realistically get like enough to work as much as other people but that’s l I t e r a l l y insane shouldn’t take 10 years give or take on disability benefits to see how not right or normal that is but here we are, thinking people deserve human rights is ‘alt left’ and some wild radical concept............. I just can’t be fucked then man I give up, go think that, go enjoy being evil like the bullshit government wow money so important but somehow not even enough, also need power so we can kill people who aren’t us.......chill whatever but I want out of this bs.  Guess I’ll google read more since this is long I am as unhinged as I sound cannot make it sound nicer so others aren’t like lol bye u low life... good Jesus Christ if your gonna think that fuck off then. So I started out to be like im a fat prick n its a mental thing I doubt will ever change and here we are right at I cannot be arsed to live in this society anymore but I can’t kill myself that’d be unfair on other hour her better keep myself alive just incase they want me for some bs reason I can probably no longer fulfil anymore lol.  I’ve written the ED (feels dumb af being this legitimately overweight and saying I have an ED but yeah guess it is or something guess bigger people shouldn’t be expected to feel like this by default, but yeah the ED part the least triggering I possibly can will avoid tags don’t want people accidentally finding this. Doubt long posts receive the unwanted attention my most reblogged post that was a thought not intended to be fucking reblogged like it’s glamorous or logical or good or cool or edgy or anything other than a rubbish self destructive thought I had...that at over 200 notes no longer isn’t just glamorising opiate addiction and suicide but hey that’s, Tumblr innit no porn anymore just stripped back to the human suffering it’s always been full of or pictures of...ominous windows recently lmao u do u yeet done talking.

[0225pm]

undefined

good morning! it's currently 9:18AM and i'm so damn beat i want to ko already but i'm pooping rn hence i've decided to post something!!!! soOoOoo because i'm an overly attached gf who needs attention like 24/7 i actually went down all the way to han's place because i missed him hahahahahaha like, initially i was contemplating about it because....... 1, i was afraid that he might have fallen asleep 2, he might not be able to leave the house at such timing 3, he might get mad at me for troubling myself before traveling to his place, dayah wanted to meet up after her shift ended for supper and since i haven't really had anything for dinner i thought it was a good idea to fill my tummy first. so i met her at our usual haunt (the mcds near our place) and asked her for some advice about whether i should go over to his place or not. she was rather against it since it was already really late (about 12ish by the time we reached mcds) and even if we're to uber or grab down it will be really really late and she was kinda worried about my wellbeing since his area is rather quiet with little to zero human traffic at such a late timing unlike our area - we have quite a fair bit of shops that are open 24/7. she also said i must be so obsessed with han to the point that i'm willing to travel all the way there so late which tbh is true la hahaha honestly i don't mind traveling anywhere he is, except maybe if i have to buy a plane ticket or smth la bc your girl is broke (；▽；) but anyway i ended up saying fuck it and just decided to go je because i'm gonna make "go je" one of my life mottos now (half kidding about this bc i'm still a coward and i'm forever thinking about the "what ifs"). and booked an uber around 1:45AM almost 2 i guess!! it was considerably cheap!!!! like $9 for the ride after discount. and wah u know how hard it was to try and surprise han HAHAHAHA i was trying to lie my way through to not make him suspicious of me by asking him to play ml together (another tactic to keep him busy so he won't fall asleep!) and then he got a lil mad bc i kept asking him to wait and wait so he played like i think 3 rounds of brawl while waiting for me to come online hahahaha but hoho little did he know!!! during the last round i told him to lemme know when his game was ending and when he finally texted me, i immediately called him and then asked him if he can come out. i'm not sure if he was taken aback bc he said no at first so i asked if his parents were asleep already and he said no LMAO i was soOo shocked but i didn't rly feel disappointed bc i know that was one of the possibility of him not being able leave the house and i actually brought along some things to keep me busy while i wait (my drawing stuff and a book i'm currently reading). then he asked me come out where? if go out he won't able to so i told him to just come down then cus i'm here and he was like "ok u wait there" AND TADA!!!!! my surprise visit was a success???!?!!!?! he asked me what i was doing there while grabbing me into a tight embrace hehehehe he looked genuinely happy and i'm happy too!!!!! he even brushed his teeth (i could smell the mint) before he left the house so that his "breath won't stink" quoted bc that's what he said hahaha lmao so cute rly!!! oh how i've missed him :') 3-4 days felt so longgGgGgg uGhhH and then we walked towards 7-11 cus i told him my breath prolly stinks since i just had macs so i wanted to get some candies to mask the grossness of the spicy nuggets i had hahahaha but he wasn't even bothered and leaned in for a kiss haisSSssssSss i spent a fortune (ok not rly) at 7-11 man like from just wanting to get candies, i ended up getting all sorts of things - a drink, ice cream, an onigiri. the amount u pay for convenience sake :') and then we decide to sit around mccafe and played a round of ml which we lost bc he didn't realised that his data was all out *rolls eyes* HAHAHAHA and then bc we were trying to conserve both our phones battery lives, we decided to stop playing and that was when i could really look at his face sighHh idk how he can look so good all the time wtf meanwhile i look like a kentang (this is true i have gained the weight i lost hahahha but good la this shows that i'm happy right) and then he went on and said "now dunno what to do right cus cannot play ml alr" and i was like nahHhh it's fine and then he looked at me and went all "is it you bored?" and i shook my head hahahah yallllllll idk about him but i don't think there will ever be a time that i will feel bored just looking at his face and basking his in presence sia like i can't get enough hahaha and then he took my phone and went through my camera roll of junk (i have 12k over photos) so i asked him for the password to his phone and he just went like this ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (damn taik rly) so i kept asking again and again and he just ¯\_(ツ)_/¯!!!! and finally said "theres some past stuff i haven't deleted yet not bc i want to keep them for memories but bc i'm lazy and idw u to see them there since it's not deleted" and i was like???? why?????? didn't u delete them???? then????? then he wanted to unlock his phone for me to let me see but i was like nah u kno what i'm not gonna get my feelings hurt bc maybe there are intimate photos inside too so i rather not look at them and he was like "no there's no intimate photos la" but it was like it's ok!!! :) and then i snatched my phone back from him since i felt like it was kinda unfair that he could see all the photos i have with no secrecy. but then he took his phone and went on a "deletion mode" clearing unwanted photos in his phone while showing me photos he had of me in his gallery!!!! i looked so!!! cute wtf HAHAHAHA like there was a few photos where i actually think i look quite cute and which i've never seen before bc he didn't send it to me wah damn selfish keep for himself HAHAHA JKJK but ya most of them were during my blonde/silver hair days tho sighhhh i rly miss having light colored hair tbvvvvh :( and then he gave me the password to his phone!!!!! wowowoow i never knew that such a day would come (no i'm not being loyar buruk ok hahahaahah) and gave me the freedom to look through his phone (but i never did actually hahaahha bc i was busy scrolling thru my 12k worth of photos instead wth i missed my chance!!!!) even when he went outside for a smoke and left his phone with me i didn't even look through his gallery wth so dumb i could have sent the photos to myself!! but ok ya then i wanted to pee so i asked him to accompany me (bc the toilet is the one at the food court and even though it's relatively clean, the atmosphere was still quiet since it was only around 4+AM in the morning). then we walked back to his place and sat at the void deck - he told me stories about his encik at the station and showed me a few diss track videos between some youtubers and this one really cool short stories videos of which i've forgotten the name of, i will have to ask him later!! and then around 630-7AM i decided to leave the place and instead of taking grab or uber back home i insisted on taking the train and bus bc i wanted to listen to an updated playlist of music that i had synced earlier on BUT LOL WTF apparently ZERO music got synced into the phone and my journey was kinda half shitty bc i thought that i can finally listen to some new tracks but i ended up just listening to the 200+ old music in my phone. not that they're bad music but it has been about 3 months since i last updated my playlist so i've been listening to the same old tracks for quite some time already. but anyway!!!! i still had a great time bc at least i managed to see han today ^^ i guess it's something to get me through the rest of the day and till tomorrow's shift. ok this took like rly long to write and i'm actually done pooping. time check: 10:09AM!! i'm gonna shower and remove my makeup before hitting the hay!

[luckylagerlegacy]

Lil Uzi Vert “Luv Is Rage 2″ Album Commentary

I’m excited that this Album is here… But at the same time it makes me a little bit sad that the twitter jokes about it never being released will cease now. I think I put the first Luv Is Rage mixtape as my rap album of the year in 2015, which makes it hard for me to know what to expect from this one. It’ll either be a classic, or an audio version of whatever Lil Uzi’s hair is doing right this very moment. Let’s not waste anymore time here, and instead just shoulder roll our way into Luv Is Rage 2:

1) Two:

Calling the first track on your album “Two” is a piss off, Uzi… But this song’s beat got the trademark accordion over it and I am instantly lulled into being okay by it. This track leads off right where Luv Is Rage ended,which is fire.. Sure, now he’s rapping about fame being poisonous and money being evil BUT shit slaps stupid hard and I can suspend my concern for his personal well being for at least as long as this song lasts.

3.5/5

2) 444+222:

EITHER SLOW DOWN WITH YOUR DIRECTIONS OR DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO, MR UZI VERT. I’m also not doing math so your probably clever song title is completely lost on my dumb ass!!!!! This song has me voguing into a broken mirror while thinking about all the girls who have ever wronged me. I’m flash dancing in my back yard, nae naeing at the thought of my own death. This is a total stripper joint, but don’t be surprised if some of them dancers recognize the sadness in Lil Uzi’s voice and shake their titties wild mournfully and make all of the perverts watching reflect on their own shit.

4/5

3) Sauce It Up:

Coincidentally, this song title is exactly what I tell the drive thru dicks at Wendy’s when they ask me which one (1) sauce I want with my six (6) orders of the dollar menu  Five (5) piece nugget. This song is sort of about nothing, but it has the cutest fucking line lmao check it out: “I WAS ON THE PHONE, YEAH WITH PLAYBOI CARTI - COMMES DES GARCON, HEARTS ALL ON MY CARDI” lol that’s silly as hell I love it, who the hell calls a cardigan a cardi? Tegan And Sara fans do. I do. This is the first song on the tape that hasn’t made me want to call a distress hotline on Lil Uzi’s behalf.

3.5/5

4) No Sleep Leak:

This song stupid as fuck but in a good way. I just woke my dog up dancing to this song. That’s a real thing that happened. He raps about recouping all of his wealth in the span of a single night which is tight, but I often do the same. I can go from like .34 cents in my bank account to uhhh like a few hundred when it’s payday. It’s not that impressive, Uzi.

3.5

5) The Way Life Goes:

My girl is at her Aunt’s house in Maryland this week (holler at me if ur tryna rob her house while she’s gone just hmu she has an xbox) and I’m actually glad now, cus you have got to be missing somebody to truly grasp whatever the fuck Lil Uzi Vert is going through right now. Who the hell hurt you Lil Uzi Vert? Your hair dresser? Reese La Flare when you ripped his whole existence off and added KPOP to it?? Who the fuck did this to you lil guy??? Lmao this song goes hard as hell though I’m pouring out a tear for my guys rn over it. This one is hilarious to me tho cus he samples an “Oh Wonder” song, and it’s adorable to me that Lil Uzi Vert knows about some fabulist ass pop duo like the rest of us sad schmucks do.

4.5/5

6) For Real:

I’m assembling an interracial squad of dance teens to perform funny looking dance moves to this song while I stand behind the camera and jerk it side to side (not like that) whenever they do the dab. This song is the most stripped down, “normal” on the project I guess. It’s cool, but I like my Lil Uzi Vert to be manic and sad and weird. NEEEEEEEEXT

3/5

7) Feelings Mutual:

Oh wow we’re diving back into the sad drug stuff pretty abruptly here. Hold the fuck on I’m gonna google “Who Did This To Lil Uzi Vert??” gimme a second. Okay, nothing came up… But damn we gotta get this guy some mood stabilizers and a workout routine so he can start to turn that frown upside down. Nobody getting double toppy from models and driving ferraris should be sad. Even if he is like, five foot minus five. Nobody who’s friends with The Migos should cry, ever! They have their own chips! This song is very good though. Again, his sad shit is really effective so even tho he’s crying for help I’m gonna pretend he’s asking me to ignore his situation and dance instead!

4/5

8) Neon Guts (Feat Pharrell Williams):

Two things: I misspell Pharrell’s name every single time I type it, and whoooo shit Pharrrlel can make a goddamn track, even now that he’s more of a spiritual guide to XXL’s freshman classes than a hit maker. He took his gigantic cowboy hat off and donned the BDBC fitted for this one. This is gonna be the biggest song off this whole album, mark my words. Shit slaps dummy hard.

5/5

9) Early 20 Rager:

Oh hey, Lil Uzi named this song the same thing as my friend’s name their Birthday events on Facebook! Hopefully this song doesn’t make me get dressed up and go to 3 bars I don’t like. He says “FUCK YO GIRL ON CAM, GOPRO” which is hilarious. I want my POV porn to have an extreme sports edge to it now. I wanna see Mia Malkova giving head while jumping out of an airplane ASAP.

3.5/5

10) UnFazed (Feat. The Weeknd):

Dog I fucking hate the weekday. I -oh wow this shit slaps nvm I’m wrong.. Still tho if I catch you out here with XO gear on I am throwing it high up into an unscalable tree. One with mad prickles. He does say “Take three Xannies like a hattrick” on this which is super fucking lame and ultra Canadian of him. I know I said that the Pharalel track would be the biggest song on this album, but every white girl I know who does blow loves The Weeknd so this track is gonna go quadruple platinum.

4/5

11. Pretty Mami:

               This song boring as fuck! Maybe Lil Uzi not liking rapping anymore… Isn’t a good thing? I thought disenfranchisement meant bangers that would make me wipe tears away in secrecy at the club… But maybe, instead it means a lack of bangers?????????????????????????? Fuck man… I hate whoever made this man so sad.

2.5/5

12) How To Talk:

THIS BITCH! This song starts with the audio of some woman calling Lil Uzi Vert out for some shit that uhhh I’m not paying attention to. Somebody on 4chan analyze this woman’s vocality n stuff so we know who to speak to about making this guy sad. This song slaps tho, he’s all apologetic about treating her badly and jealous that she’s talking to a ball player. The beat is rad as hell. This is the mood I think of when I think of Lil Uzi’s music. More of this, less Pretty Mami.

4/5

13) X:

Metro Boomin and Pierre Bourne co-producing a Lil Uzi Vert track? I’m in clout heaven. Somebody fetch me a pair of those dumbass glasses that every future dead kid wears while they nod out on xanax. You know the ones? The Fallout 4 fancy lady joints. Thanks. Okay this song is golden and I will defend it no matter what the hell happens with the next two tracks. I’m doin all of Uzi’s dances as best I can to this, eating gummy bears, feelin cute.

5/5

14) Malfunction:

               In the first verse on this dreamy lil song Uzi says “ALL MY GIRLS DRESS LIKE THEY WORK AT HOOTERS” like it’s a good thing. If I’m worth millions of dollars, my many, many girlfriends would all be dressed in differently themed designer garb: One goth model with diamond encrusted tears, one pioneer thot with a golden pitchfork, a pair of ghost women wearing spooky Red Bottoms, etc. Let’s have some showmanship, please. This song is good though, the last ¼ of this album is picking it up.

4/5

15) Dark Queen:

Dark Queen is my favourite race in World Of Warcraft, so I’m stoked on this. The song is all about his relationship with his mother, and how it relates with his relationship with the music business instead of sick raids and fuckin uhhhhhhhh killin monsters? Idk I never played WoW I was too busy playing other videogames u fuckin dorks.

3.5/5

16) XO TOUR LIF3:

               *Crying* SHE SAID BABY I AM NOT AFRAID TO - *still crying* DIE! I forgot this song was on the album. Wow, what a fuckin banger. I want whoever reads this to make sure the lyrics to this song are etched into my gravestone (if I somehow don’t end up buried in an unmarked grave by a jilted lover and her new, tougher boyfriend) Ugh this goes so fuckin hard. This is one of the only songs that, if you have it as your ringtone and it goes off really loudly while we’re sitting next to each other on the C-Train, won’t earn you a dirty look and a subtweet. I want to celebrate the sadness in this song. You did it, Lil Uzi.

5/5

 FINAL SCORE: 7.8/10

This shit had some up and down moments, I’m not gonna lie. But, the good outweighed the bad. I hope Uzi finds the help he needs before his hair gets any more neon than it already is. We believe in you, lil fella.