#idk...it just sours my grapes....so much good one could do

[yukipri]

Galaxy's Edge Foodstuffs & Drinkstuffs Reviews!

So last month, I was able to finally visit Black Spire Outpost, aka Batuu, aka Galaxy's Edge, aka Star Wars Land @ Disneyland!

This is a roundup of photos + reviews of all the themed foods & beverages that mum and I enjoyed during our trip.

Note that I visited Batuu West, in Disneyland California. Florida may have slightly different menus, and I know that menus change seasonally too! My visit was in January, 2023.

The rest of the photos + reviews under the cut!

Oga's Cantina

In the early morning on the very first day, we stopped by Oga's! We got some non-alcoholic drinks + some small eats to start the day off.

Non-Alcoholic drinks:

Memory's foggy, but I *think* the drinks are: 

Blurrgfire: Minute Maid® Lemonade, Pomegranate Juice, and Habanero-Lime

Review: Mildly zingy? but otherwise a pleasant juice drink.

Black Spire Brew: Cold Brew Joffrey's Coffee®, Honey, Falernum, Passion Fruit, and Citrus

Review: Probably the most questionable drink we had, but glad we tried it! The coffee + citrus gave it a sorta...sour? taste? and I'm not sure how I felt about that in my coffee! But it was certainly unique.

Blue Bantha: Blue Milk served chilled with Bantha-inspired Brown Butter Chocolate Chip and Coconut Cookie

Review: Realizing now we didn't get the cookie, sad ;_; It was ok, but idk it felt like it tasted a lot better from the Milk Stand! It was also kinda room temperature, though we *were* in the very first early morning round of people. Overall didn't stand out too much, but wasn't bad either!

Jabba Juice: Simply Orange® with Pineapple, Kiwi, Cantaloupe, and Blueberry Flavor-filled Boba

Review: A slightly mixed-juice but mostly orange juice with some blue popping boba! Was good in a normal, could probably make it at home sorta way.

Food stuffs:

Five-blossom Bread: Warm Pretzel Knot with Hawaiian Black Sea Salt, served with Calabrian Cheese Sauce

Review: It was super warm 'n toasty, surprisingly filling! It was a pretty normal pretzel and the sauce was a pretty normal slightly spicy cheese sauce, but it was still delicious!

Spiced Wroshyr Pods: Seasoned Edamame, Sliced Cucumbers, spicy Citrus-Gochujang Dip

Review: Ngl, these were just straight up plain edamame ^ ^;;; BUT the sauce was really good, preferred it to the pretzel sauce even!

I had another reservation at Oga's on a different night, and this time we tried some alcohol. Now, tbh I am not a huge fan of alcohol; I can drink it, but I just don't really like the flavor, and have never gotten drunk (nor do I really want to), and all it makes me feel is the vague urge to pee. But, I felt obligated to try something alcoholic at the cantina, so here's what I *think* we got!

Jedi Mind Trick (alcoholic): Ketel One Botanical Grapefruit and Rose Vodka, John D. Taylor's Velvet Falernum, Bols Blue Curaçao, White Grape Juice, Lime Juice, and Grapefruit Bitters

Review: It was defs sweet? Fruity? But alas, Alcohol taste was strong for me ;_;

Hyperdrive (Punch It!) (Non-alcoholic): Powerade® Mountain Berry Blast, White Cranberry Juice, Black Cherry Purée, and Sprite®

Review: Got one non-alcoholic drink, and ngl it was definitely my fav drink out of the 3 ^ ^; Unfortunately don't remember much of it, other than that I was using it to cleanse the alcohol flavor...

Fuzzy Tauntaun: Cîroc Peach Vodka, Bols Peach Schnapps, and Simply Orange® topped with Tangerine, Pure Cane Sugar, "Buzz Button Tingling" Foam

Review: This was the most recommended drink by people we spoke to + blogs I read, so I figured hey let's try it. Other people have described the foam as "tingly," but tbh...neither mum nor I really felt it? It was very foam for sure, messy, hard to get at the drink without getting foam all over your face. Taste was pretty mild (+ alcohol, LMAO).

In conclusion: Kazu, u know u don't like alcohol, plus it's expensive. Let's just stick to non-alcohol next time and save our credits, yeah? ^ ^;

Docking Bay 7

I LOVED Docking Bay 7! It was surprisingly spacious, and perhaps because we went when it wasn't too busy, but there was never any trouble getting seating. With mobile pickup food was ready almost instantaneous, and the whole interior had such an awesome aesthetic with tons of cool design details!

Trandoshan-style Pasta with Braised Bantha: Chile-braised Beef, Buttered Garlic Cavatelli, Seasonal Vegetables, Zesty Avocado Sauce, Balsamic Glaze

Review: This is the green-lookin' dish! I LOVED this one, so much I went and got it again on a different day. It's pasta, which I'm naturally biased towards, but also a lotta meat and veggies too, and pleasantly spiced. It felt like a Good Food, while also being unique and interesting enough it felt sorta Star Wars, I really enjoyed it!

Endorian Fried Chicken Tip-Yip: Crispy Chicken, Roasted Vegetable Potato Mash with Green Gravy

Review: Also good! But tasted a lot more "normal." It's a nice piece o' chickin floating in a ton of mashed potato gravy. Warm and filling, but didn't really feel as themed.

Drinks!

Moof Juice: Simply Fruit Punch®, Simply Orange® with Pineapple, Chipotle-Pineapple

Review: Another pleasant fruit juice! Gosh there are so many fruit juice mixes here! Not complaining bc I love them. Don't really remember too much about this other than "sweet."

Phattro: Gold Peak® Unsweetened Tea, Minute Maid® Lemonade, Desert Pear

Review: Another mixed juice drink, mum and I could only tell it apart from Moof Juice bc this one was mildly less sweet, more tea. Both were good!

Cold Brew Black Caf: Cold Brew Coffee topped with Sweet Cream Cheese and Chocolate Puffs

Review: I actually really enjoyed this one!! Much more than the questionable coffee at Oga's. It's got literal cereal floating on top! One thing that we found was that it wasn't as sweet or well mixed right after picking it up (no duh), but if you wait for the cream cheese and cocoa puffs dust to trickle down (or just mix it), it's a lot sweeter and so much yummier!

Also from the Docking Bay:

Vintian Mineral Mousse: Banana Brûlée-centered Dark Chocolate Mousse, Strawberry Mousse, Vanilla Chantilly, Chocolate Crumble, Cherry Garnish

Review: THIS THING. Y'all, if I had to pick just one food item to recommend from all of Galaxy's Edge, it would be this. Wasn't really sure what it was at first, and almost didn't order because I'm not a huge fan of banana flavor, but I'm SO glad that we did. Each of the blobs is a different flavored mousse, the banana being the largest, and i *think* the blue was Vanilla, pink strawberry, though those may be flipped. They each had a sorta shell like covering with soft mouse inside. They all tasted incredibly fancy and delicate, like very expensive patisserie quality, and each blob was so distinctive so you never got bored. I even liked the banana one, though I preferred the other two. The best way to eat is to take a spoonfull, and then scoop through the crumble to pick up as much of it as possible. The added crunch makes it even better!

Overall, this not only tasted phenomenal, but it had gorgeous and distinctively "Star Wars" visual presentation, and overall was so unique!

Moving on,

Milk Stand + Ronto Roasters

While the Milk Stand and Ronto Roasters are completely different shops and aren't even close, I picked up drinks from the Milk Stand for breakfast on our second day, so reviewing them together!

Blue Milk: Plant-based blend of Coconut and Rice Milk with alluring fruity characteristics

Review: The Iconic Drink. I hear that people have mixed opinions about this, but I actually really liked it—and it also tasted SUPER familiar. If any of you have had ramune before, the Japanese soda drink in a funky glass bottle that you can find at most Asian markets, it tasted SUPER similar. Perhaps part of me is biased bc my Japanese ass associates blue = ramune, but really, if someone made a ramune slush and maybe added a wee bit more citrus, this would be it. I also happen to love ramune, and slushes, so of course this was a win! If you want to taste ramune to see what Blue Milk tastes like (at least in my own humble opinion, backed by mum), make sure to pick up the "original" flavor! Overall this was super chilled and refreshing, I loved it!

Green Milk: Plant-based blend of Coconut and Rice Milk with zippy citrus and tropical characteristics

Review: I read some reviews that this was nasty, but I didn't think so, it was also pleasant. There was a bit of a strange, possibly slightly medicinal aftertaste, and it was also "milkier" than the blue so it felt less refreshing. Of the two, I definitely prefer blue, but enjoyed my cup of the green too!

Ronto Morning Wrap: Scrambled Eggs, Grilled Pork Sausage, Shredded Cheddar, Peppercorn Sauce, wrapped in Pita

Review: A very yummy wrap from Ronto's, only available in the morning! I felt like of the 3 wraps, this one was the richest, with a lotta cheese, egg, sausage. It was filling and super good! I wouldn't say that the food item itself felt particularly unique, but Ronto's has a super cool setup, so just being able to eat in the vicinity puts you into the universe.

Evening on a different day, we tried the other wraps!

Ronto Wrap: Roasted Pork, Grilled Pork Sausage, Peppercorn Sauce, tangy Slaw, wrapped in Pita

Review: The classic. I was expecting to like this one the most, and while it didn't disappoint, the others were actually so good they all sorta evened out? For being the meat option, it had a lotta veggies and didn't feel unhealthy, at least compared to my usual diet LMAO. I liked this a lot, and like the morning wrap, it was very tasty in a normal food sorta way!

Ronto-less Garden Wrap: Plant-based Sausage, spicy Kimchi Slaw, sweet Pickled Cucumber, Plant-based Gochujang Spread, wrapped in Pita

Review: Usually not a huge fan of fake meat, but this vegetarian option was actually really good! Of the 3, I think I might have even liked the flavoring best? It had a bit of zing to it, possibly due to the kimchi. Either way, I'm glad I was able to split these with mum!

Hard to say which of the wraps I liked most, I think I liked all of them around the same! None of them stuck out as Exceptional, but they were all good!

Drinks from Ronto:

Tatooine Sunset: Gold Peak® Unsweetened Tea, Minute Maid® Lemonade with Melon and Blueberry

Review: Yet another pleasant fruity drink! Don't remember much about it, other than that I liked it, and it once leaned mildly less sweet than the other one ^ ^;

Meiloorun Juice: Pineapple Juice, Minute Maid® Lemonade, with Blueberry, Cranberry Juice, Lemon Juice, and Desert Pear

Review: THIS ONE. If I had to choose ONE fruit juice out of the tons I had, this one is my favorite. I want to say that "Meiloorun" in the name isn't biasing me (it may be), but no really, this one was genuinely so good. It felt denser? than the others, really citrusy but the flavors were really well mixed so it tasted like an all-new fruit, exactly what I'd expect a Meiloorun to be like! I chugged two of these lmao.

Got this on the final day, also from Ronto:

Destran Ice Cap: Sprite®, Orange-Tangerine Syrup, topped with Sweet Cream Cheese

Review: Wasn't sure about the whole "cream cheese in soda," but I'm glad I tried this because I actually really liked it! The cream cheese added a pleasant, well, creaminess to the orange soda of the rest of it, giving it a sort of ice cream float-like feel without the ice cream. Would defs get again!

Lastly,

Kat Saka's Kettle

Picked this up on the last day!

Outpost Mix: colorful blend of seasonal flavors (blend of Caramel and Chocolate-glazed Popcorn)

Review: Honestly just a pleasant popcorn mix! It was good, flavor wasn't too strong, pretty mild. Was a nice easily consumable crunchy snack. It says caramel + chocolate, but tbh I mostly just tasted "mildly sweet." I was hoping for the brightly colored purple/red mix that at least looks a bit unique, but perhaps that's for a different season? Either way, yeah, I enjoyed this but didn't feel it was particularly special ^ ^;

~~

Aaaaand that's my review! I didn't quite eat *everything* at Galaxy's Edge, but I tried a darn good majority.

Overall, the vast majority of food/drink was super darn good and well worth the money! Some was more unique than others, but the quality was consistently high throughout. I did not eat outside of Galaxy's Edge my entire trip and felt very satisfied with that!

My standout favorites were: the pasta & mousse dessert from Docking Bay 7, blue milk from the Milk Stand, and Meiloorun juice from Ronto's!

I also got all 3 of the thermal detonator-shaped water bottles, but well, the flavor inside was just your regular Coke, Diet Coke, and Sprite. Still cool souvenirs!

But yes, in general, just so many fruit juices haha. Luckily I do love fruit juices, and also I'm glad that all of the bathrooms in Batuu were both clean, spacious, *never* had lines, and were also super cool-looking. Because given the amount of sugar water I was chugging, yeah. I visited them a lot!

While there's a good variety of food on Batuu and I think they did a great job with the menu, there were a few things that I hope they expand on in the future.

First, while there were some options for folks with dietary restrictions, they were extremely limited. Unsurprising, as most of the food shops already have an extremely limited menu with single digit menu items total. But it would still be nice to see these menus be expanded in the future, or possibly adding additional shops so that something, somewhere might work.

Next, I felt myself wishing for more take-home souvenir-type food. Liked boxed cookies, chocolates, y'know? Sure, you could technically take home the popcorn, but it's just in a brown bag. I'm genuinely shocked they didn't have Grogu's blue macaron cookies, I'm sure those would sell insanely well. Mouse-man, u listening?

Again, I know a lot of food menu items are seasonal/limited, so I hope I can visit again when things have switched around!

If you've been to Batuu, what were your favorite things to taste there?? Any hot items I missed?

Anyway, I hope you found this review to be interesting! Thanks for reading!!

[fruitcoops]

hi eve! what do you think about a video where couples do the chapstick challenge? like jily vs coops and they compete to see what couple guesses more right! idk i think i would be fun

It's been too long since I wrote one of these--I missed them! Coops, Cubs, and SW Jily belong to @lumosinlove <3

“Welcome back, everyone!” Dorcas said with a smile to the camera. “It’s been over a month since our last big video like this due to scheduling, but we hope you’ve been enjoying our more active social media presence in the meantime. I’m here today with James and Lily Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and our lovely Cubs. How were your summers, everyone?”

“Hear that, Cap?” Logan’s grin was smug as the cat that got the canary. “I’m lovely.”

“Our summers were great,” Sirius said, ignoring him. “Lots of vacation time.”

“At our house,” Lily teased.

“Yeah, while you were on vacation. It’s called being a good godfather.”

“I’m glad you all had fun,” Dorcas interjected smoothly as she pulled three bags from under her chair. “Because we’ve got a very special game today. Inside these bags are ten blank chapstick tubes, each with a different flavor. One person from each team will apply the chapstick to their lips, and their partner will first have to kiss them, then guess the flavor. Finn, Leo, and Logan, your team will have two guessers.”

“They get two guesses?” Remus protested. “That’s so unfair!”

Dorcas shrugged. “They have to guess at the same time, and they only get one point per correct answer.”

Finn raised his eyebrows. “Y’know, Loops, you’re starting to sound pretty homophobic over there…”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” Remus sighed.

The camera cut; when it returned, Lily, Sirius, and Finn were seated in folding chairs with the bags of chapstick in their laps and a small sticky note in their hands. Across from them, their significant others were sitting with large headphones over their ears.

“Can you hear me?” Dorcas called.

Remus didn’t react at all as he messed with the trailing wire; Logan squinted at her. “Quoi?”

“I can’t hear anything,” James said loudly. “This is super weird. It’s just, like, humming. Honey, it sounds like Harry’s white noise machine!”

Lily smiled reassuringly and patted his hand. “A little quieter, lover.”

“What?”

“A little—nevermind.”

Dorcas’ mouth twitched with a suppressed smile. “Non-guessers, you can find all the flavors written on stickers at the bottom of each tube. Please start with number one on your flavor lists when you’re ready.”

Sirius bit his lip as he riffled through the bag, and Remus leaned forward to give him a light peck at the corner of his mouth. “I haven’t put any on yet!” he laughed.

Remus paused. “What?”

“I haven’t put any chapstick on.”

“Slower, I’m not good at lipreading.”

“Mon dieu,” Sirius muttered with a shake of his head.

Next to him, Finn had already applied his first flavor and was sitting with a happy smile as Leo and Logan thought for a moment. “Is it lime?’ Leo guessed.

“I think it’s lime,” Logan said half a second later. Finn gave them a thumbs-up and the three of them high-fived. “Called it!”

“That’s…lemon? Really sour lemon?” James guessed. Lily shook her head and showed him the tube. “Lime. Shit.”

Remus licked his lips. “Lime?”

Sirius nodded. “Oui!”

“Really? Hell yeah!”

“We’re at a bit of an advantage,” Sirius said as he put the lime in his lap and checked his list. “I wear chapstick all the time.”

“Why?” Dorcas asked, sounding rather amused.

“My lips get dry from being at the rink all day.” Sirius shrugged and put the next one on. A mischievous smile flickered over his mouth and he tilted his chin toward Remus. “He won’t leave me alone, either.”

Remus’ eyebrows pitched and he leaned forward. “What?”

“Nothing.”

“You have to go slower, I really can’t—”

“Green apple!” Logan exclaimed, slapping Finn’s knee in excitement as Dorcas covered her mouth to hide her laughter. “I remembered what it’s called!”

“Correct!” Finn announced.

“I think it’s green apple,” Leo said.

James pulled away and rested his chin on his hand. “Kind of a caramel apple, but without the caramel.” Lily turned to face the camera with a look of disbelief. “So just a normal apple, I guess.”

“Yes!” Lily turned his face toward her with a smile. “You got it!”

“I got it? Woohoo!”

“That’s green apple.” Remus wrinkled his nose. “Tastes like those shitty candy apple lollipops, though. Did I get it?”

Sirius nodded and wiped his lips off. “Number three is pomegranate,” Dorcas announced.

Finn frowned as he dug through his bag. “I don’t—there it is. Wow, this smells really nice.”

Leo paused and smiled before kissing him. “That smells really nice!”

“Does it?” Finn laughed before moving to give Logan a kiss.

“Oh, I like that,” Remus said, kissing Sirius a second time. “No idea what the flavor is, but I like it. Hmm. I have to think about that.”

“Is that frosting?” James asked excitedly as he grabbed Lily’s hands. “Do you have frosting flavored chapstick?”

“No,” she laughed, shaking her head. “What the hell? It’s pomegranate.”

“It’s what?”

“Pomegranate.”

“Persimmon?” She rolled her eyes and showed him the sticker. “Wow, I never would have guessed that.”

“Is it cherry?” Remus guessed. Sirius shook his head and his face fell. “Aw.”

Leo and Logan shared a look as Finn kept his poker face. “I have no idea what that is,” Logan finally said. “It’s sweet, though.”

“Is candy-flavored chapstick a thing?” Leo wondered. Finn held the tube up. “Pomegranates are tart. That wasn’t tart.”

“What the hell is that?” Logan looked to someone off-screen and held one of his headphones away from his ear.

“Une grenade!” someone called.

“Oh! That didn’t taste like it at all.”

All four guessers kissed their partners within a few seconds for the fourth—almost immediately, they pulled away, faces twisting. “Oh my god,” Remus coughed, wiping his lips. “That’s grape. Oh my god.”

James’ nose scrunched. “It’s grape. I don’t like it.”

In a moment of direct action, Leo took the wet wipe Finn had been using and ran it over his mouth while Logan stuck his tongue out. “It’s grape, and it’s gross. No more cough syrup kisses, please.”

“You’re halfway there!” Dorcas called, chalking up their correct guesses on a whiteboard as Lily, Sirius, and Finn applied the fifth flavor.

Sirius held his hand up as Remus started moving in and sneezed. “Desolee. Okay, you can go now.”

Remus kissed him and recoiled in half a second. “More cough syrup? Are you kidding me? It’s not any better when it’s cherry.”

“Dorcas,” Leo whined when he pulled away. “The first ones were such nice flavors!”

“My head hurts just tasting that,” James said miserably. “It’s that awful fake cherry stuff.”

“That’s cherry.” Logan smacked his lips with a grimace. “Eugh.”

Dorcas held up five fingers for them to see as she spoke. “Just five more, and you’re all done. Those are the only bad ones.”

Lily lit up as she applied the sixth and James hurried to kiss her. “Oh, that one is nice! You always wear strawberry. It’s my favorite.”

Remus shrugged. “Kiss was great, flavor’s fine. It’s just fake strawberry, yeah?”

“Whew.” Leo’s eyebrows rose after the kiss. “Very st—”

“Oh, strawberry!” Logan interrupted. “Katie makes me wear something like that when we have tea parties.”

Dorcas added more tallies to her board. “Tremzy, you can’t hear me, but that’s the cutest thing you’ve ever said. We need pictures.”

“I’ll find some,” Finn promised.

Sirius rubbed his lips together and made a face; Remus laughed, running the pad of his thumb along his mouth. “Stop, I can’t kiss you like that! It can’t be that bad.”

“That would give me a headache,” James said, clearly disappointed. “It’s some sort of pineapple monstrosity. Pina colada? I liked the strawberry a lot better.”

“It’s pineapple. Does that count?” Lily asked. Dorcas nodded, and she gave James a high-five.

“That’s not bad,” Leo admitted with a shrug. “Tastes like the dried mango we get at the store, the kind with all the sugar on it.”

“I don’t have the first idea what that is,” Logan said. “Knutty, I’m letting you take the reins here.”

“You’re both wrong,” Finn said, enunciating every word so they could read his lips.

“Baby—” Remus faltered with a laugh and held the wet wipes out of reach as Sirius tried to take them back. “Baby, we don’t get a point if you wipe it off. Just one kiss, okay?”

“Fine,” Sirius grumbled. Remus pressed a sweet kiss to his upper lip and handed him a fresh wet wipe. “Happy now?”

“Oh, I like that,” Remus said. “It’s definitely pineapple. I can see why you hated it so much.”

“Cap, do you not like pineapple?” Dorcas asked. His intense wiping of his lips was the only answer necessary. “We’re in the final three. Sirius, your team is in the lead by one.”

“Come on, hubs,” Lily said as she put the next one on. “This is easy-peasy. We have to beat Cap or we’ll never hear the—”

“Mint!” Leo exclaimed, looking quite proud of himself. “Ooo, it’s like Christmas.”

“I can smell it all the way over here,” Remus laughed, though he didn’t pass up the kiss. “That’s peppermint.”

“It’s like a candy cane,” James said dreamily.

“He’s not going to like this one,” Sirius said as he capped the next chapstick. “I like it, though, and that’s all that matters. Pucker up, Loops.”

“Oh, hell no.” Remus leaned back as Sirius leaned in, keeping his lips out of range. “Nope, not a chance. That’s some plastic vanilla bullshit and I’ll be tasting it all day.”

Dorcas tapped him on the shoulder and he lifted one headphone. “If you don’t taste it, you don’t get a point this round.”

“We can take the hit.”

“What? No!” Sirius protested. “I had to taste the pineapple, remember?”

“I love you and I totally want to win this, but I really, really don’t want that taste in my mouth.”

“Fine,” Sirius sighed, wiping his lips off as Remus readjusted his headphones.

James’ face split into a beaming smile after his kiss. “Birthday cake!”

“No.”

“Shit.”

“Vanilla,” Leo and Logan said in unison.

Finn pumped both fists in the air. “Yes! We’re tied for first!”

Leo gave him a high-five. “I don’t know what you’re saying, but you seem excited about it!”

“Last one,” Dorcas warned. “Whenever you’re ready.”

“You should wear chapstick more often,” James said as Lily lined her lips. “It makes you so soft.”

“He has no idea how greasy my mouth feels right now,” she said fondly with a glance to the camera.

“Tell me about it,” Sirius agreed. “Alright, Loops, don’t pussy out this time.”

Remus narrowed his eyes. “You just told me not to pussy out, didn’t you?”

Sirius blinked at him. “I thought you couldn’t read lips.”

“C’mere.” Remus cupped his jaw in one hand and kissed him, then smiled. “Orange. Did we win?”

“Mmm, that’s what the oranges back home taste like,” Leo said, going in for a second kiss.

Logan licked his lips a couple of times. “Tastes like fancy orange juice. I like it.”

“In a cruel twist of irony, my lips are getting dry,” James said when they parted. Lily raised her eyebrows as he thought. “That’s orange. We won, right?”

“Take off your headphones,” Dorcas said, miming the motion until everyone could hear her before holding her scoreboard up. “Unfortunately, James and Lily are in last place with a score of seven out of ten. Cap and Harzy, your teams are tied for first place with eight out of ten.”

“We could have won if you didn’t have a personal grudge against vanilla,” Sirius said under his breath. Remus threw one of the chapsticks at him and Sirius dropped another down the neck of his shirt.

“Boys.” They both gave Dorcas a sheepish look and she shook her head. “Thankfully, we prepared for this situation with a tiebreaker. Nobody but me knows the flavor, and it is not written on a sticker. Remus, Leo, and Logan, you will not have to put your headphones on again, but you will have to correctly identify both flavors to get their point. You will write your answers on these whiteboards. You only get one kiss to determine your guess. On your marks, get set, go!”

Sirius swiped a decent amount over his lower lip and pulled Remus in with his hands on his cheeks; Finn practically used half the stick covering his mouth before collecting his kisses. “That’s interesting,” Leo murmured, tapping his dry-erase pen on his thigh. “That’s very interesting.”

Remus jotted down an answer and leaned back in his chair with a self-satisfied smile. “You know it?” Sirius asked with a grin.

“I do.”

“Is that your final guess?’ Dorcas checked. He nodded, and she took his pen. “Leo, Logan, do you have a guess as well?”

“I think I know one of the flavors,” Leo said cautiously, bending over to whisper it in Logan’s ear. He hummed in agreement, then whispered back.

“This is so intense,” James murmured, looking between the two teams as Lily perched herself on his lap. “I feel like I’m watching the Olympics.”

“If we get one of the flavors right and Loops gets both wrong, do we win?” Logan asked as Leo wrote their answer down.

Dorcas thought for a moment. “Yeah, sure. But only if Remus gets it completely wrong.”

“What’s the prize?”

“You already get to kiss your partners all afternoon instead of running drills. What more do you want?”

“Amen,” Remus agreed.

“Alright.” Leo handed over the whiteboard pen, though he looked nervous.

“Would you like to go first?” Dorcas offered.

“Coconut and lemon?”

“That is incorrect.”

“Ah, fuck me,” Logan muttered. “Loops, you’d better be wrong.”

Remus’ smile was even more pleased as Dorcas turned to him. “Remus, do you know what it is?”

“Well, Ms. Meadowes, I’m glad you asked. That’s Burt’s Bees honey and coconut.” He flipped the board with a flourish. “And it just so happens that my boyfriend bought that exact chapstick at the store last week and has worn it every single day since then.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Leo looked between them in shock as Logan’s jaw dropped. Finn buried his face in his hands. “Of every flavor on earth—”

“I promise it was not intentional,” Dorcas said, though she was laughing a little. “I literally rolled dice to pick it while I was looking at the website.”

Sirius looked to the ceiling as he pulled Remus’ chair closer. “Thank you, universe, for my terrible impulsive habits in the self-checkout line.”

Dorcas turned to the camera with a dimpled smile and spread her hands. “Thank you for joining us for the chapstick challenge, Lions! You can find all these flavors at the link in the description. Like and subscribe for more videos like this, have a great day!”

[jingerhead]

I posted 1,189 times in 2021

267 posts created (22%)

922 posts reblogged (78%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 3.5 posts.

I added 2,208 tags in 2021

#aftg - 651 posts

#jinger's recs - 360 posts

#random thoughts from jinger - 213 posts

#aftg fanart - 182 posts

#aftg fanfic - 149 posts

#jinger's works - 148 posts

#beefy andrew supremacy - 134 posts

#andreil - 129 posts

#tfc - 121 posts

#all for the game - 121 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#oh man just the thought of him dying andrews hair 🥺🥺🥺🥺 the trust oh him working the dye into andrews hair and washing out in the shower

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Idk if this counts as a prompt but i LOVE anything where neil is a better flirt than andrew and andrew gets all flustered in his andrew way

AH YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT

Side note: I am a horrible flirt. Like, the absolute worst. But I'm gonna try my best for this, I hope you like it anon!

(listen I'd like to thank @paradoxolotl for helping me so much I literally don't know how to do it I owe her my life)

~*~

It was a well known fact that Neil Josten's mouth had gotten him in trouble on more than one occasion. Sometimes it was irritating, and other times Andrew's mind went blank after hearing some kind of witty retort Neil would throw at someone. Which wasn't a problem, because Andrew had enough self control to not 'panic' when something like this happened. Usually he just removed himself from the situation, knowing that Neil could fight his own battles perfectly fine.

But this...was nothing like cutting comebacks.

You see, somehow, someway, Andrew had decided to start flirting with Neil Josten. It had started long before that kiss on the rooftop or that one night at Eden's, and now he was...really trying, he supposed. This entire past week he'd tried saying a few lines that only seemed to confuse Neil, but it hadn't taken long for Andrew to learn that the ones that really got to Neil were nothing about his appearance. One time Andrew had been listening to Neil talk out loud about a math problem he was having trouble with, and without thinking he'd just decided to say, "You're smart."

It was entertaining to see the way Neil's eyes had widened in surprise.

Keep Reading...

272 notes • Posted 2021-08-21 02:32:42 GMT

#4

aftg headcanons of neil + fruits or other teams meeting the exy-sport-running-obsessed mess that is neil josten and kevin day?

Ahhhhhh I'll answer this while I finish up other requests :)

I love the headcanon that Neil really enjoys fruits and isn't really into much other sweets.

He really likes blackberries and raspberries. If they get a carton while on a grocery run, it'll likely be gone by the next day. He will risk a stomachache to do this. Every time Andrew spots him eating out of the carton like a maniac, he'll remind Neil that he's going to feel awful later. Neil always ignores this and refuses to complain but he will pout.

He also likes oranges. He's a monster that will eat the zest. He's horrified SO many people because of this.

He will also eat a lemon without flinching? It's an awful experience and he doesn't like lemons but one time he and Kevin had been arguing, he accidentally grabbed a lemon instead of an orange and pealed it and went to eat it. Kevin was stunned to silence and Neil immediately regretted everything but he refused to back down so he just ate it. And now it's just something he does through sheer willpower alone.

He isn't that into strawberries? He'll eat them if they're around and there's no other option, but they're not his favorites.

Blueberries are untrustworthy. They're either super sour or mushy and gross, so he avoids them at all costs.

Neil only eats green grapes and he's very passionate about it. Anytime anyone mentions any other type of grape he will rant about how green grapes are the only type worth eating and he doesn't even have a very good argument about it? When anyone asks him why his default answer is because, "They're not mushy and don't taste bland."

Read The Long List of HCs Here...

282 notes • Posted 2021-06-08 16:58:30 GMT

#3

512 notes • Posted 2021-11-21 05:29:25 GMT

#2

For 100-follower-day prompts: Neil trying to explain the differences between beefy twinyards to the other foxes (or, alternatively, trying to explain how he tells the difference WITHOUT mentioning the beefiness 👀)? Love your stuff btw, thanks for all you do!

Now this is quality content, thank you so much, lovely!! Here's a short:

They were trying to trick him again.

Neil and Kevin had gone to the court for some early practice before actual practice, and now Neil was paying the price for not traveling with Andrew. He and Aaron had dressed in baggy black sweatshirts, thick sweatpants, and only wore socks on their feet. Andrew had removed his earrings and Aaron had styled his hair like Andrew's. The rest of the Foxes were sitting in the lounge, smirking amongst themselves and snickering once in a while, no doubt at whatever face Neil currently had on his face.

"You guys..." he huffed. There had to be a bet of some kind, and a good one, too. The only reason Andrew and Aaron went along with bets were if the prize was worth it.

"Go on, Neil," Allison said cheerfully. She was the organizer, no doubt.

"This isn't funny," Neil said lowly. "And it's getting old."

"You only say that because you lost last time," Matt replied with a loud laugh.

Neil didn't loose last time, because there was no bet last time. Last time, Andrew was being a dick, and Neil had been feeling sick and miserable. Aaron shouldn't have walked into their dorm that day if he didn't want to get mistaken for his brother.

"Just guess, Neil," Allison said.

Keep Reading...

755 notes • Posted 2021-06-16 00:49:07 GMT

#1

My multi-chaptered wip: *sobbing* please....just update me once...it's been 2 months...

Me, writing another domestic-fluff oneshot: no

2563 notes • Posted 2021-06-18 14:44:58 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[ukai-simp-services]

hq character’s favorite lip smacker flavors

warnings: none, just slight cursing

a/n: wow the way this was one of my best ideas... anyway some of these are kinda repetitive so bare with me 😭

karasuno

hinata

i feel like hinata would be down for one of the really fruity flavors, like watermelon or mango sunrise. forgets it at home or in your car a lot so you always buy him extra.

kageyama

kags is def giving me the classic strawberry or cherry vibe, like the one that ALL stores sell. they’re the easiest to find and he likes the flavors.

daichi

ok i feel like daichi would use the peppermint flavor a lot, but i can also seeing him use the cinnamon flavor every now and then too, spice things up a little.

sugawara

i can see suga using some of the sweeter flavors, like strawberry as a daily chapstick and maybe sugar cookie when he wants to switch things up.

asahi

mans got the whole berry pack. uses them pretty frequently throughout the day, has a different flavor in different places. like one in his school bag, one in his gym locker, one at home, etc.

tanaka

ok tanaka probably doesn’t use use them that much, but when he does, he fucks w the soda flavors. like coke and sprite.

nishinoya

i don’t even think he knows what lip smackers are....but let’s give him the benefit of the doubt and say he would use one of the sugary ones. like the skittles one.

tsukishima

vanilla. no pun intended. i just totally see him using the vanilla flavor, probably the coconut one too.

yamaguchi

i can see bby using the pink lemonade,,,maybe the cucumber melon too mmmm. applies them a lot.

ennoshita

he uses that lime flavor (i forgot it’s exact name) but that and probably some fruity shit like tropical punch.

ukai

PLEASE. he wouldn’t sell lip smackers at his convenience store so he’s like ?? tf is that babe ?? but, once you show him he’d definitely be down for the rootbeer or coke flavor, he’s a soda man what can i say. BUT i imagine he’d keep it simple most of the time w peppermint. (u also make him start selling them so he ends up trying the fruity flavors~)

kiyoko

god, i wanna say the cherry flavor bc of the mf katy perry song (pls tell me if yk what im talking about) BUT i can also see her using the mint one and the coconut one too. queen has multiple flavors, as she should.

yachi

100% one of the candy flavors, like bubblegum. definitely the cotton candy one too. yachi’s lips always taste good period.

nekoma

kuroo

another cherry chapstick lover, but he spices his shit up with the cherry cobbler flavor. wants to taste good at all times for you~

kenma

doesn't use it often, but when he remembers or you remind him, he'll usually use a fun soda flavor like from the fanta pack,, or even just regular grape.

yaku

giving me grapefruit delight vibes...idk why but he just is. i can see him whipping it out in the lockerroom before practice starts, quickly applying it before any of the other guys come in.

yamamoto

omg ok so i feel like similar to some of the other guys, he’d shy away from using it in front of anyone. but i can see him using the tropical punch flavor ??

lev

tell me lev wouldn’t use the vanilla icecream one...like i can just see it. i feel like he would lowkey take pride in it too, like he knows that shit taste good.

seijoh

oikawa

this mf uses peppermint religiously. but this is oikawa we’re talking about so i think he definitely would have multiple flavors; definitely watermelon, probably chocolate mint, and for sure starburst.

iwaizumi

he’s kinda shy about using them so he sticks to the more lowkey flavors, probably like blue raspberry or kiwi. (pls gimmie a blue raspberry kith haji)

mattsun

i feel like he wouldn’t use it much, but he’d use the lemon drop flavor. loves using it during the winter bc of the weather.

hanamaki

another soda lover. i feel like he sticks to the coca cola flavors, like vanilla and cherry. (i love the cherry one omfg) maybe the root beer one too.

kunimi

bubblegum. that’s it. that’s the flavor. it’s always on him at ALL times. like that shit doesn’t leave his pocket, he once even accidentally washed his pants with it still in the pocket.

kindaichi

mmmm i think he’s definitely a berry guy, likes mixed berry or wild raspberry.

mad dog

yes i just labeled him by his nickname instead of his real name what about it- anyway. why do i think he’d use orange creamsicle on the LOW. like mf HIDES that shit. can never catch mad dog applying mf orange creamsicle chapstick. nope.

fukurodani

bokuto

omg ok bby definitely uses strawberry cheesecake or sour apple. ik they’re like two totally different flavors but, he just DOES. and he’d pucker his lips towards you every time he applies it like “BABY GUESS WHAT FLAVOR MY LIPS ARE” like ok bo c’mere then.

akaashi

he’s a simple man, he enjoys a nice strawberry banana lip smacker on his lips. maybe even pumpkin latte (during the fall of course) bc he’s festive <3

konoha

mans is using the dragonfruit flavor (i forgot if it’s just dragonfruit or if there’s another flavor combined in there) but, he literally just uses that flavor. like idk what to tell you. he just does.

yukie

ok i love her sm, i just know she would have strawberry kiwi and probably strawberry banana too. mmm yummy.

shiratorizawa

ushijima

i feel like kageyama, he would only buy the ones he sees at most stores...so a classic like mango or kiwi.

tendou

ohmygod, mans has a whole mf collection. like first of all, he has the fanta soda collection, obviously. then, there’s the candy pack with nerds, fun dip, laffy taffy, jolly ranchers, etc... he also fucks w any sour flavors. basically, everytime you kiss this man you’ll be tasting something different.

semi

another blue raspberry mf, but also i can see him using the dr pepper flavor LOL....i wanna taste>:(

goshiki

he’s a sucker for the grape flavors, regular of course, grape jelly, grape fanta, etc.

shirabu

mmm i can see him using pineapple. it’s a subtle flavor, but its the one he likes best. i don't think he'd use it all that often tbh, but when he does his lips taste absolutely ~fresh~

date tech

aone

PLSSS i just know mans wouldn't even know what a lip smacker was, would probably just be using normal burt’s bees like most people - till you introduce him to the wide range of flavors that lip smackers have to offer. he'd be like “hm, banana.” LIKE. either THAT or piña colada, he’s really trying for y’all.

kanji

cake donut?? do i have an explanation?? nope. i don’t even know what that would taste like, but i can imagine pretty sweet? just give him a mf kiss.

inarizaki

atsumu

PLEASE. he’d use the strawberry flavor ALL the time. like ok maybe occasionally the vanilla icecream too. but im so soft rn for ‘tsumu’s strawberry lips T_T

osamu

omg he’s such a cheesecake mf i just KNOW, so he’d have the strawberry cheesecake flavor. probably use chocolate moose sometimes too if he’s in the mood.

kita

this is NOT up for debate, he’d 100% use berry pie all the time. kita get ur ass here rn, we’re bouta smooch.

suna

pls bc he’s another one that’d only use it on the low. i’m feeling watermelon,, he’d always apply it before he sees you too.

aran

ooooo i can see him using cinnamon swirl, but also grape on a more common occasion. yummy....

extras

terushima

HHH sour apple for sure. he’d try to put on you all the time so you can taste like him too, he’s like “baby c’mere ;)”

saeko

bitch omg, why can i see her using the cherry cream soda one.... i literally don’t know where she could buy it but she’d fucking have it, like for SURE.

sakusa

STOP bc he’d definitely reprimand you for using lip smackers instead of a brand like ChapStick or burt’s bees. like shut up bitch...but also if you’re persistent like me, then you’ll definitely sneak the lemon drop flavor into his jacket pockets whenever you have the chance. you know it’s his secret guilty pleasure <3

[gyeheoni]

Get to Know Me Tag!

Tagged by @catboydongheon and @a-drawingpanda​ ! (thank you both so much for the tag ^~^ ! lovelies 🥺💗💗💗 !) 

What day is your birthday? ... a day ... 

What is your favorite color? rose quartz, serenity, and lilac ^~^ 

What’s your lucky number? huh ... none ig ? ;0 

Do you have any pets? does a younger brother count ... no lol 

How tall are you? 163cm :0 woozi height ^^

How many pairs of shoes do you own? like ... 2 lmao 

Favorite song? hhh never have just one but rn it’s the whole sour album annnd blue hour by txt ^^

Favorite movie? don’t watch movies enough to have one either fjkhgdfkjg

Who would be your ideal partner? ??? who wrote these ... juhaknyeon 

Do you want children? lmao no

Have you ever got in trouble with the law? no ...? 

Baths or showers? showers ^^

What color socks are you wearing? it’s summer <3 no socks season 

What type of music do you like? mostly pop music :0 but some r&b and a bunch of other stuff too :]]

How many pillows do you sleep with? 4 lol (technically six but...) 

What position do you usually sleep in? on my side usually >.< and only on one half of the bed haha

What do you typically have for breakfast? never wake up early enough for breakfast so ... 

Have you ever tried archery? yes at science camp ^^

Favorite fruit? *hoyoung voice* strawberries and ... watermelon (and mangoes and grapes too ^^) 

Favorite swear word? i don’t really curse so T-T 

Do you have any scars? :// i guess 

Are you a good liar? probably not, even tho i do it often 

What is your personality type? ISFP-T

What is your favorite type of girls? odd question, but all of them u.u obviously  

Are you an innie or an outie? innie LMAO

Left or right handed? right 

Favorite food? pasta ! annnd uh ... this one hk cafe specialty item that would take too long to describe 

Favorite foreign food? ?????? uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh idk but i have tried a lot of different asian foods (since that’s primarily what i have everyday) so ?? fjgdkfjgh

Are you a clean or messy person? depends on how i’m feeling fjghdfjkhgdkj

Most used phrase? probably ‘so true’ / ‘too true’ i h8 what the internet has rendered my vocabulary down to lmao 

How long does it take for you to get ready? also depends on how i’m feeling could be 5 mins could be an hour 

Do you talk to yourself? yes helps physically vocalizing some of my feelings sometimes rip .... 

Do you sing to yourself? oh a lot jfkgdfg choir kid things ....

Are you a good singer? prob avg ? i tried out for chamber choir in hs and got in and also get compliments here and there but tbh i lack a lot of technical skills / talent i think at best i just have a good ear for pitch matching 

Biggest Fear? [insert a long essay about insecurities etc.] idk bugs ? 

Are you a gossip? depends on context ! some things i’m nosy about and some things i am not 

Do you like long or short hair? on me ? personally long hair ^^ 

Favorite school subject? biology is neat ^^ i also really liked digital art although i lack creativity lol

Extrovert or Introvert? i’m an introvert at the end of the day, my social battery is tinie ... 

What makes you nervous? everything ? ig LOL perks of overthinking too much and having anx13ty <333 

Who was your first real crush? oh there was this boy who lived two floors down from my apartment and he came knocking on my door asking to hang out ;;;; and we played basketball and went down to the creek by the nature trail and splashed each other with water ... didn’t end well lmao but it sounds nice like that doesn’t it ? 

How many piercings do you have? two ;0

How fast can you run? in peak PE days i could do a mile in eight minutes but now running a block makes me want to pass out so LMAO

What color is your hair? technically black hair is not a thing so reeeeally dark brown almost black at my roots and reddish brown bc i dyed my hair <3 really wanna redye my hair tho ;;;;;;;;;;;;; 

What color are your eyes? dark brown <3 

What makes you angry? i don’t get angry often actually ;;;; i have a lot of patience rather than angry i can get frustrated when smth i tried really hard at doesn’t work out or if people are being inconsiderate i tend to overthink a lot, so when other people are careless about their actions that makes me a bit upset 

Do you like your own name? not really ? it doesn’t hold any meaning but as a name it’s just a name :// nothing good or bad ig 

Do you want a boy a girl for a child? what is this the 20th century .... 

What are your strengths? oh boy wish i knew / had any 

What are your weaknesses? oh boy what isn’t 

Color of your bedspread? it’s white with blue ink drawings <333 pretty and my aes ^^

Color of your room? like a dark biege <333 neutral tones my beloved <333 

thank you both again for tagging me !!! many hearts <333 prob won’t tag anyone >.< no fun maybe but idk who to tag :,3

[smollandtoll]

HC: Radio Morning Show Hosts AU

Imagine a universe in which Gabe and Tyson are co-hosts of a morning radio show on AVS FM. Tys is constantly trying to slide into co-hosting the lunch/early afternoon/late morning slot with MACKDOG (aka Nate) but their boss likes the Gabe/Tyson chemistry too much to let them break up.

Also all their listeners kind of ship them because Tys is always describing Gabe as like a beautiful golden viking stallion - getting more flustered and touchy whenever Gabe presses him about it. Or when someone calls in to try to also comment on it Gabe gets really awkward and laughs uncomfortably while Tyson agrees wholeheartedly - Gabe is one of the most beautiful people alive.

Whenever Tyson is out sick or generally anyone tries to also get in on Gabe’s ribbing of him Gabe has NONE of it and always defends that Tyson is SO FUNNY AND SHARP AND SELF-DEPRECATING and you could nEVER measure up to him.

Basically Gabe just plays straight man to Tys’s random craziness and their regular listeners are waiting for the day they wake up married to each other by accident.

Their show is a mix of things, random news, traffic, and celebrity gossip, they both always comment on hockey and cheer for canada and sweden in respective world championship things and chirp each other and are endlessly fond of each other.

Tyson has a segment that's just him updating everyone on what the Kardashians are up to so no one has to actually keep up with them and when he's sick Gabe does it and he's like: "...well...a lot of them have k names..."

and then Tyson gives him endless shit for not even trying - and Tyson talks to him about them ALL THE TIME.

Anyway as we mentioned Tyson is always trying to escape their show doing anything he can to get out of the morning.

"WE COULD HAVE A TYSON-N-TYSON SHOWWWW THOUGH!” He screamed at a retreating afternoon host Josty, "THINK OF THE TYSON TUESDAYS!!"

(this universe has no female hosts and idk why but like it's a terrible drought and they are all the poorer for it)

Gabe just gets increasingly concerned and slightly hurt that Tyson keeps wanting to bail out of the show on him. Morning show is like THE BIG NAMES, IT'S THE COVETED POSITION! And they get to take so many naps! But that 4 AM call time is ROUGH sometimes. Tyson is just desperately trying to get some distance (also some sleep).

“You don’t get it, Nate I AM LOCKED IN A BOOTH WITH THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MAN ALIVE EVERY MORNING MINIMALLY CAFFEINATED.” He hisses at Nate while he patiently replies to facebook messages, “He smells so good, all shower fresh in a little intoxicating sound proof box, just reciting the traffic report  like it's no big deal. CAN'T HE SEE I’M DYING LITERALLY EVERY MORNING?” Nate rolls his eyes at Tyson and shoves him out of the way to tug his headphones on, ignoring the rant that he’s been listening to since Tyson started with Gabe day one.

They also spend a distressing amount of time hanging out too, because NO ONE HAS TIME OFF TO GET DRINKS ON THE PATIO AT NOON AND THEN BE IN BED BY 7. NO ONE. So Gabe is kind of depressingly Tyson’s BEST FRIEND. Like Nate of course is his best friend forever, but he spends so much time with Gabe, every day, they text and do errands and hang out. They also watch hockey together and ending up sleeping on each other because those games be long and they start at like 5 earliest their time - and it’s a distressing trend to wake up pillowed on Gabe’s chest like he could actually BELONG THERE.

It’s enough to drive a man mad.

Then, one Valentines day the station hosts a contest for Tyson who is endlessly and painfully single and complains about it. So they create a bit where he goes on 14 dates with different people leading up to Valentines Day where one winner will get a fancy steak dinner with him etc etc. They get the evening guy (Night time with Nail - He’ll YAK you to sleep) to call up these dates on air after they’re finished and get the scoop on how it went.

Gabe is unreasonably grumpy during this period of time, to the point he’s actually kind of short on air.

Tyson of course complains to Nate about it when he rolls in for their shift overlap and Nate just looks at him like he’s dumb.

“Of course Gabe is being pissy, he has to listen to you while you dissect going on two weeks worth of shitty dates.”

“You have to listen to me too and you’re not acting like I died your dog blue.”

“I’m not in love with you.”

“Neither is Gabe.”

“Okay, Tys, keep telling yourself that.”

Tyson thinks Nate is probably smoking whatever it is that all their listeners are on because they’re actually getting a lot of complains about the bit - how it’s insensitive, and poor ol’ Gabe. They’re all sniffing glue if they think Gabe is acting like sour grapes because he’s jealous of all of Tyson’s dates. He could pick up anyone he wanted any time he wanted!

And besides it’s not like the dates are going well, Yak keeps reporting that all the dates think he’s very Cute and Charming but he spends too much of the date complaining about how annoying Gabe is being - like he’s really preoccupied.

Nate gives him many Significant Looks™ about it.

So it goes that their producers definitely think it’s coming to a point where they need to intervene and with Nate and Josty and Yak’s input they pull some strings so the last date Tyson has before Valentines day - he stumbles into the restaurant and gets led to a table in which Gabe is waiting.

Tyson: Is this a sick joke?

Gabe: Nate said the producers were getting tired of getting emails about us

Tyson: God. That’s so embarrassing, I’m so sorry. I keep trying to get my shift swapped around maybe I need to change stations entirely.

Gabe: No! No that’s not. That’s not what I want. That’s not what anyone wants.

Tyson: Why are you here? Wait are you here to fire me????

Gabe: I’m not -- Tyson! I’m here to go on a date with you, sit down.

Tyson: Date? A real date?

Gabe: Is that so hard to believe? That I could possibly think you’re clever and funny and hot?

Tyson: ??????????????????????????????????? No?

Gabe: Sound more sure of yourself.

Tyson: This isn’t a prank?

Gabe: Unfortunately no. I’m actually into you and it took an entire city’s worth of people complaining to our bosses to get you to actually go out with me.

Tyson: You never asked!!

Gabe: We’re not arguing about this any more!

Tyson: We need to argue, how is the rest of our lives going to go if we don’t argue

So basically Tyson gets a clue, and spends the next show insufferably smug about how hot his boyfriend is, and they get many callers in wishing them well - also to make fun of the fact that their anniversary is now Valentines day. A terrible fate.

They give away the steak dinner to a random listener and spend their Valentines at home, eating at 5 and crashing by 6:40, and it’s perfect.

BONUS

MIKKO THE STATION INTERN that Gabe is SO DELIGHTED BY and Tyson sees them palling around while Gabe is showing Mikko around the booth and yelps: "ARE THEY CLONING YOU NOW??? HOW IS THAT FAIR?? YOU SHOULD NEED A PERMIT AT LEAST FOR THAT."

[kangyunas]

⁚ ⁛  oh my god ! you can’t believe who i just saw. it was  kang yuna !  they really resemble  seo soojin , don’t they ?  i heard they started their career about  one year ago  as the  main dancer + lead rapper + vocalist  in  v-nyx , but it sure seems longer, doesn’t it ?  they always seem so  optimistic ,  elegant  +  selfless  in interviews and to their fans, but their latest scandal made them sound like  timid ,  sensitive  + cautious … oh well, must’ve been the bad lighting. did you know they came all the way from  seoul ,  south korea  to new york city ?  it was really brave of them to sacrifice so much. you think they’re survive the spotlight ? 「+ seo soojin 」

god so i’m sleep deprived and idk what i’m abt to write so let’s see how many tws i can avoid adding. apparently , sleep deprived me is good at avoiding tws so that’s cool.

 —   𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌𝒈𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅 𝒊𝒏𝒇𝒐.

on march 9th, 1998, kang yuna was born and raised in seongbuk-dong, seoul.

if the neighborhood wasn’t enough to tip one off, the kangs were well-off; her father having been the ceo of the family business in and around medical equipment while her mother was off signing paperbacks for her avid readers.

— quite a happy  little  family, which she pointed out time and time again to her parents soon after she learned how to walk and talk. and sing and dance, as they soon realized.

and who were they to ignore their precious little girl’s requests ?

(  ... ok, so they already planned on having another child but it made her much happier to think that she convinced her parents for a sibling  )

but by the time she was on her way to english preschool, she doted on her younger sister; it seemed endearing to those outside of the household, but beyond the surface, was an unfortunate side effect of two hard-working people that were too busy to come home and have dinner with their children.

only when she turned nine did she realize  why  she saw less and less of her parents.

as it turned out, her mother had an affair with one of her publishers and she’d taken advantage of yuna’s pleas for a sibling as a cover around the time.

her father found out, over the years, due to how much their youngest  didn’t  look like him — and more like that one publisher.

long story short, the teen lost her mother and sister as she got back home from school, leaving bare rooms and sour memories, their belongings all gone.

the news was publicized almost immediately and she and her father had to deal with the aftermath. bright flashes, handheld mics, and condescending tones became their norm for a little while.

from then, she saw her father even less... those early morning flights, late night meetings, or long business lunches really holding him captive. other than the times he’d try to show her the ropes of running the company, she saw the man maybe twice a week if she was lucky.

she quickly learned how to take care of herself without the help of their staff.

doing a lot of the house chores by her lonesome, it offered her some peace of mind. for whatever reason, her father took that as a sign that she was preparing to be a housewife.

arranged to be engaged to a business partner’s son by the age of sixteen, yuna tried her hardest to get out of it.

the most rebellious and impulsive thing she did was sneaking out to go to an open audition after being cast by a company scout at a talent show.

her father refused to let her become a trainee for two years, for obvious reasons, but yuna was adamant and in the end, he let her go.

(  suddeN i know i’m sorry i didn’t know how to get here without taking another 3pg essay to explain as;dlkf  )

she trained hard as a main dancer for a couple of years before she found her girls.

though she was very shy in meeting and training with them, she immediately found a safe place in their group. in their little family.

tbc.

    —   𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚.

vvvvvv timid, even though she was raised to be a businesswoman

performing on the stage and in front of the cameras is a bit of a different story

but incredibly shy

will try to get a smile on your face, nonetheless

wears her heart on her sleeve tbh, she can’t tell a lie without her eyes getting glassy

the Mom Friend™

she’s used to taking care of the others honestly

no matter how much of a mess they make

probs cuts up apples and orange and peels grapes for snacks

and makes sure they eat something for breakfast

also packs the girls’ lunches when they have indv schedules

a pure bean

    —   𝒊𝒎𝒑𝒐𝒓𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒔. 𝒕𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒔 𝒔𝒖𝒑𝒆𝒓 𝒅𝒖𝒑𝒆𝒓 𝒊𝒎𝒑𝒐𝒓𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒕.

once agaiN, this is basically soojin w a few exaggerations here and there

has a black belt in taekwondo for some reason probs so she can kick my ass

speaks english fluently bc she went to those fancy pants schools all her life

hates being called a chaebol / doesn’t want the attention that comes of it

loves cherries and avocados but like,,,,,,, not together

volunteers at the local animal shelter when she has time

could own a tesla but she probs has a minivan or a hatchback bc she a soccer mom

may look like she knows what she’s doing but is in a perpetual state of confusion

yuna at all times: ???¿¿?¿??

connections??????? haven’t thought of them yet but am always down to brainstorm but it’s like 3am and i’m supposed to be up at 8am goD,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, but as always, IMs are always open so pls come and plot with me and my bean ~

[wishtorn]

          heya i’m kit ! i’m going to start this off by apologizing for how obscenely long this intro has turned out to be. i really got caught up … but there’s a summary at the very end, and if you do read the entire thing you get a million brownie points ! message me here or on discord to collect. i’ve also included a handful of general plot ideas if anyone’s interested in them, but i’d also love to think up some more specific ideas. just like this or shoot me a message and i’ll come plot !

⤷ ( kit. cet. 21. she / her. none. ) the courts offer bread and salt to anya targaryen née redwyne of house targaryen. many say the twenty-four year old queen of the southern kingdom is known to be well-intentioned and nurturing, though ill tongues whisper that she is guarded and sentimental. when her name is uttered, one is reminded of sleepless nights, a faint light in the fog, & the smell of sea salt and spring.

         tw - discussions or mentions of alcoholism, childbirth & pregnancy, domestic abuse & neglect, drowning, food & disordered eating, mental & physical illness, misogyny. ( i didn’t realize it was going to be this much of a shitstorm until i sat down and started writing. idk what to say, guess i’m #dramatic ? )

pre - history ( house & parents. )

the redwynes were always military men. had to be, really, being island people, more isolated and often more endangered than their mainland counterparts. really, there was nothing quite so loved as war, except perhaps wine.

an old, proud house, the redwynes and their fleet have fought for targaryen kings for centuries — they stood by aegon in the dance of the dragons, stood by jon & daenerys against cersei lannister, and even stood by maegos against the dornish and northern rebellions.

lord desmond redwyne took his father’s seat in the reign of king aeron. in a prosperous and peaceful time, men drunk on dreams of a glorious war grow restless — so he hunted, and whored, and drank, and none of it so much as touched his reputation. no, lord redwyne was an honorable man, a true servant of the realm, an example to many.

lady viola redwyne might have said otherwise, had anyone asked her. prone to bouts of melancholy, often disagreeable, and with a reputation for refusing suitors, she might have even succeeded had she not been so beautiful. lord redwyne must have her, and her father could not refuse.

his second wife, fifteen years his junior, and unhappy with the match, she could not love him, nor his other children, nor the arbor. a lack of love in such close quarters sours into hate over time, like bad wine. one of her few reliefs was that he already had an heir and a spare. poor health and misery would not have made her a brood-mare of any longevity.

long before her parents ever laid eyes on each other, however, a scandal rocked the redwynes ; lord desmond was then merely the heir, a knight and a naval captain of some repute. his eldest sister was already wed to a lord on the mainland, but the younger was a wilder thing, with a taste for adventure that was indulged by their father. the lord greyjoy’s reputation preceded him, and when she first spotted him, on the deck of a ship off the coast of fair isle, he had already quite captivated her. they met in secret, at sea, where they were not lords or ladies but each king on their own ship. the last time her ship sailed from the arbor, it was under the cover of night, to steal away to pyke, and the shame and scandal of it tore through the redwynes like a hurricane. she was shunned, rarely spoken of, and when the news came from pyke that she had died, no one at the arbor shed a tear. 

family history ( early childhood. )

as it stood, anya was more an unexpected result than a desired outcome, and ultimately even a bone of contention. she bound her mother by love, to the arbor and the man that she hated.

they were left well enough alone, for a time, viola and her daughter, the septa, and the maidservants. even the wet nurse sent away. anya’s infancy brought a modicum of respite, but it would not last more than a handful of years.

by that time it aroused suspicion. lady redwyne would hardly leave her chambers, refuse to let the child out of her sight, would not see her husband and even refused food for periods at a time. it was unhealthy, unnatural, they soon started saying. in inns and winesinks at ryamsport men would murmur ‘poor lord redwyne, imagine a wife that beautiful going mad on you,’ into their cups, laughing at their great fortune to have avoided his.

and perhaps there was something real to it, perhaps there really was something unsettling about the arrangement. perhaps not. but in the end it was only the talk that mattered. once it reached lord redwyne’s ears, red with shame at being laughed at by traders and fishermen, he put his foot down. viola’s whims were not to be indulged or tolerated any longer, and besides, ‘the child’—by this he meant anya—‘must grow to be a fool or a half-wit if left in her care.’

and so anya was removed to the care of a cousin, mostly sheltered from her mother’s influence. there were fights about it for months. the withdrawn lady redwyne who would not speak but to her daughter and her maidservant and looked to the window whenever anyone looked at her had disappeared. she raged, schemed to steal her daughter away, wept, wandered the halls at night, and made trouble.

lord redwyne even tried being gentle, for a time, speaking in soft pleading words for her to be reasonable, but gentle or harsh it made no difference. if she saw anya twice, even three times a day, it was not enough — to her mind, he had stolen her daughter, stolen her life, stolen her freedom and anything else he might think of taking, and she wasn’t wrong. but when she threatened to throw herself from the eastern tower, she sealed her own fate.

on horseshoe rock, one of the smaller islands in the waters surrounding the arbor, a small stout keep was furnished and staffed, and lady redwyne was sent out of sight, out of mind, and certainly out of the way, where she couldn’t cause another such a stir — and most importantly, after a while, the talk died down.

personal history i ( childhood & youth. )

with all the difficulties tended to, and all the loose ends and loose canons carefully tied down, anya’s upbringing was left to a succession of septas, servants, and after a time, an aunt, newly widowed  and returned to the arbor.

out of her father’s favor for as long as she could remember, with a rocky relationship with her siblings ( i won’t go into detail in case my wc is picked up ! ), anya found little relief within the castle walls. she attended her lessons dutifully, could sew and sing and smile, recite the houses, their sigils and heroes, and it all meant little and less to her.

she wanted to set sail, she had always insisted — since before she knew what it really meant, just uttering phrases picked up along the way the way one does around seafarers — but desmond redwyne would not suffer any of his daughters to venture so far beyond his control. he knew better than to trust sailors, and certainly never trusted women.

so instead anya spent years at her window, watching sails shrink and disappear over the horizon ; by the sea, swimming in a cove under the watchful eye of the septa ; sneaking in the fields during harvest, stealing grapes ripe to bursting. searching desperately, maybe shiftlessly, for a little bit of sweetness. all the while she visited her mother only rarely, on namedays and holy days and days when, for whatever mysterious reason, her father’s pity won out over his good sense.

she studied too, though silently, mostly unnoticed. the kitchen girls, the household guard, the way people talked when they didn’t think anyone was paying attention. watched her father most of all, and had no illusions about him. even if she still aspired to please him, somehow, to gain his approval, she knew: he was a cruel man, harsh, childish, selfish, drunk on wine and himself, and yet still too clever to let all of that be his ruin.

her betrothal, like any lady’s, was inevitable — on the horizon of her future, marriage appeared to her like a fog, uncertain in all aspects but its impending approach. in the end it was a transaction, as these things almost always are. ships, wine, and gold ( but really, mostly ships ) were enough to make one of lord redwyne’s daughters a future queen.

demure, docile, even shy, few suspected that, days before she was to leave for king’s landing, anya would disappear in the night. would sneak from the castle in the dark, with a torch and one gold dragon, paid to the wife of a fisherman who, in her husband’s small boat, rowed anya to the shores of horseshoe rock to say goodbye to her mother one last time.

it was a mistake, but she couldn’t have known that. she came at night, the only time she could, but to viola, startled from her sleep, she was a ghost in the moonlight. after the truth came, ‘i’m leaving. father says i must,’ her mother, in tears, threw herself in front of the door, on the ground, wept in fits and refused to let her leave. it was the first and last time anya ever truly believed her mad. with promises that she would refuse the prince and sail home as soon as she could, she left.

she was guilty, of course — so guilty it ate her up, and very nearly killed her, but not so guilty that she turned back. her mother could not bear for her to go, but anya felt she would die — truly die — if she were forced to stay.

the preparations were already well underway by the time word reached them from the arbor. lady redwyne had disappeared. alseep in bed at night, swore the servant, but gone in the morning. the island was searched for weeks, coasts scoured, sailors and captains interrogated, but to no avail. some say she escaped, others that she was kidnapped, and yet others know with conviction that she simply walked into the sea and drowned.

personal history ii ( marriage & rule. )

though she wore the right house colors, anya was married in mourning. the wedding was a ridiculous affair, lavish and splendid and festive, and it only made her all the more self-conscious. she was polite, sweet, but in the momentary lull of conversation she looked lost. doe-eyed — not innocent, but wary, reproachful.

but the rockiness, the uncertainty, if at first seeming insurmountable, soon dissipated. prince daeryon was not her father, nor much like many other lords that had so worried her. no, he was kind, and gentle, and patient, and in need of some kindness himself.

as unlikely as it may be, they tended their happiness like a garden, and it wasn’t long before leaves were sprouting where her fear had been. for a while they lived well, on laughter and sunlight and the thrill of young love.

but of course it doesn’t last — nothing does. when king aeron dies, things change hard and fast. the freedom to walk through the city, ride in the kingswood, or sail to dragonstone for a fortnight on a day’s notice was gone, replaced by a hundred new duties, funeral arrangements to be made, small council meetings to attend.

at that point, the two of them also certainly start feeling the pressure for an heir. the difficulties and delays that had once been only a source of gossip became a source of concern, even as their duties kept them apart more often than ever, as the long nights and tense meetings started to fray his nerves.

they were soon blessed with a son, aeric, though the pregnancy and birth left anya exhausted, weary, and withdrawn just as her husband needed her most. the pressure of the crown which he had borne with such fickle strength was beginning to crush him.

no man, not even the best of them, could carry a kingdom on his own. it certainly wasn’t made easier by the constant jostling from one side or the other, a meddling mother, resentful elder sisters, or grasping, ambitious councillors. anya was forced to admit that however much she loved her husband, however good a man he was, he was not a good king. not good enough.

so she rose to the occasion, as gracefully as her fears and meagre experience let her, sitting in on small council meetings and more private discussions, by his side. she consulted carefully, leaning heavily on the hand of the king, working tirelessly to ensure her husband’s realm remained intact, his rule secure, and their family safe.

present.

her son is nearly four years old now, a happy, healthy child without the slightest clue of the dangers he is in, simply by virtue of his birth. anya worries about him constantly, and spends as much of her time as she can with him.

in king’s landing, she’s often attending meetings, writing letters, keeping busy — all to ease the pressure from her husband, who is only worrying her more and more as each day passes. he grows withdrawn, erratic, unpredictable, but she’s less afraid than sorrowful. he’s in pain, she can tell that much, but how to soothe it ?

very nervous about the trip north. she’s never been so far before, never left her son so long before, and certainly never seen her husband in such an unfamiliar — hostile ? — environment, and is deeply concerned with what issues might arise.

still, the coronation at winterfell is a solid opportunity to strengthen the ties that the previous generation had spent so long binding, to show each other and the realm that two kings intend to continue their fathers’ peace and collaboration.

tl ; dr.

      + well-intentioned, nurturing, insightful, gracious, curious, resourceful       - guarded, sentimental, unforgiving, hesitant, volatile, insecure, spoiled

a traumatic, tense, and lonely childhood, ghost-like and disconnected. mommy and daddy issues, because why not.

a betrothal for wealth and power ; naval strength and trade wealth married into royal bloodlines. 

a young son and a marriage that is loving, starts easy, but grows ever more strained under the weight of a crown.

trying desperately to keep her shit ( her kingdom, husband, family ) from falling apart at the seams.

way more responsibility, work, and stress than she signed up for, if we’re being honest, but she makes it work.

stress, anxiety, worry, chaos, fear, all those good things tbh.

and despite it all, at least a conditional kindness, and a sentimental softness that ought to be hidden better than it is.

plot ideas !

lady friends. yes i know how stupid that sounds, but honestly, a girl needs girls around her or she’s bound to lose it. i imagine she’d mostly know other ladies from the souther kingdom, but may have also met and befriended others from the north at the funeral of king aeron, or elsewhere.

almost- or cancelled betrothal. someone whose father was in talks with anya’s to arrange a betrothal, or perhaps one had already been arranged. they could know each other and have met, or have never laid eyes on each other. either way, once a royal prince is on the table, any deal is off.

cousins. i haven’t yet decided what house anya’s mother is from, so there are plenty of options for familial attachments there ! her father also probably had sisters, although they’d probably be another generation older and have adult grandchildren at this point, so. second cousins ? i think ?

enemies of the crown. honestly, i love some drama and animosity, so i’d love any reason for there to be tension and cold looks and only the barest minimum of politeness, with undertones of anger. ugh, wat a dream. could be they disapprove of the targaryens, or of daeryon in particular, or of her personally too i guess, or something went down ?

again these are just vague ideas, but i will come up with tons of more specific ones for anya and your muse(s) if you want me to !

[frighthouseofalighthouse]

All weird asks!! They're so good!

Sorry this is a bit late, babe! I wanted to wait til I had the opportunity to answer all these uninterrupted!

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Coffee mugs! tbh I drink tea out of coffee mugs because who actually uses teacups? I mean my grandma has tons and I would use them, but the handles are so tiny and I am v clumsy so it scares me.

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

Chocolate bars!!! I’m too impatient for lollipops and plus they always get coated in saliva which just...drips down my chin since my mouth is already full.

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Bubblegum! I love cotton candy but I can only handle a bit at a time tbh. Also I haven’t had bubblegum in almost two years bc of braces and I miss it so much I can’t wait to have it again.

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

Okay, so even though I’ve always been homeschooled, when I was in elementary school we did this program with a ton of other homeschoolers where you could take actual classes and stuff. My teachers always said I was quiet and focused and studious, and you could always count on me to be lecturing everyone else on the instructions if they hadn’t been paying attention. (does any of that surprise anyone?)

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? GLASS SODA BOTTLES. nothing beats soda that’s been bottled in glass rather than plastic. You ever had orange cream soda from a glass bottle????? SLAPS ASS MY DUDE.

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

Pastel/boho/preppy/goth, my dude. I have so many sides to my fashion and aesthetic.

7. earbuds or headphones?

EARBUDS BC HEADPHONES NEVER FIT OVER MY EARS RIGHT. BUT EARBUDS WITH SOFT TIPS BECAUSE MY EARS ARE TOO SMALL FOR THE PLASTIC ONES.

8. movies or tv shows?

Tv shows tbh because even though I can binge 4 eps of 45 minutes each per night, they’ll hold my attention a lot more than a movie. It’s weird.

9. favorite smell in the summer?

Thunderstorms/petrichor, also natural bogs. PEAT BOG SMELL FUCKING SLAPS.

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

None. I liked trampoline time back when we took gymnastics, if that counts. I also liked jump roping and Irish step dancing.

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

Nothing lmao. I sleep til like noon and then I microwave something for lunch.

12. name of your favorite playlist?

My catchall playlist, Things I Love, my summer playlist, Summer Songs, my Gryffindor playlist, My Queen And Country playlist for writing, and my playlist for The Raven Cycle. (after I post this I’ll edit it and link them)

13. lanyard or key ring?

Keyring, a lanyard would like constantly detract from my outfit if that makes sense???

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

Sour Patch Kids or Swedish Fish.

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

Between The Grapes Of Wrath, The Great Gatsby, The Handmaid’s Tale, and To Kill A Mockingbird!

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Just fucking sprawled every which way.

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

My grey converse if it’s comfortable out, my silver flip flops if it’s hot, and my fur-lined black combat boots if it’s cold.

18. ideal weather?

65-70 degrees, partly sunny, breezy, not humid.

19. sleeping position?

I need to sprawl to fall asleep, but once I’m asleep I curl up into a little ball.

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

Laptop and notebook ONLY IF I’m sure of myself, which isn’t often. But I do write dense, scribbled paragraphs on sermon note pages if something comes to me during church lmao.

21. obsession from childhood?

The American Revolution, weather, astronomy, and mysteries/ghost stories.

22. role model?

Idk tbh? Lately I’m just trying to define and live up to my own standards?

23. strange habits?

Pulling the collar of my shirt up to my mouth and sucking on it. Also being a perfectionist in my writing. I don’t do messy drafts. It’s all perfect by the time I write it, and I edit/spellcheck as I go.

24. favorite crystal?

Amethyst (my birthstone), bismuth, opal, and blue goldstone.

25. first song you remember hearing?

Other than nursery rhymes/kid’s songs, it was Light Up The Sky by The Afters, or California Dreamin’ by The Mamas And The Papas.

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Find shade/a cool spot and read with a cold drink.

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

ALSO READ. And snuggle with thick socks and a cup of tea and play DS games all day.

28. five songs to describe you?

My five faves atm -

I Am Here // Pink

The Pines // Roses and Revolutions

Soldier, Poet, King // The Oh Hellos

Traveler’s Song // Aviators

Hymn // Kesha

29. best way to bond with you?

Share my interests about politics, history, books, true crime, paranormal, tv shows, and also be kind and understanding when I don’t text for long periods bc I don’t feel up to talking.

30. places that you find sacred?

The woods on the hill behind my house. Dense, deeply green, secluded woods. Hedge mazes. Old and crumbling castles. Anywhere beneath a clear sky and a full moon. Your heart when you’ve come to terms with your fears and made peace with yourself. Anyplace with historical significance. Bookstores on an autumn/winter day. Libraries.

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

A kickass plaid, bruh. Also my leather jacket - once I lose enough shoulder weight to fit in it again.

32. top five favorite vines?

Fre shavoc ado, the one where the dog eats the butterfly, the Lin-Manuel Miranda one where he’s brainstorming, “what the FUCK kind of weather is this, and the dad and son with the saxophone and the oven door.

33. most used phrase in your phone?

“oh mood”

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

“WOW! It’s NatureStone!”

35. average time you fall asleep?

Right now it’s 4-5 am because I suck.

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

I Can Haz Cheezburger, My mom used to look at the website with me when I was like 10.

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

They both have pros and cons. :/ Duffel bags are easier to carry but suitcases keep stuff from getting broken better.

38. lemonade or tea?

TEAAAAAAAAAAAA

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

Lemon meringue pie!!! my stepdad made a really good one the other week.

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

Nothing, since I was homeschooled. Same weird shit that always happens at home. Our safe word for when I got overwhelmed in math was “quokka” and we’d stop and look at cute quokka pictures.

41. last person you texted?

My gf :)

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

Jacket pockets because things are not only hard to fit in girls’ pants pockets, but if you put a chapstick/lipstick in there it starts to melt :(

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

BETWEEN HOODIE AND CARDIGAN. SO VERSATILE. SO COMFY.

44. favorite scent for soap?

Irish Spring soap or the blue Dial bars smells better and cleaner than anything to me.

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Fantasy. It can take me a bit to get into it, but once I do, I love it. I only do sci-fi if it has rebellion and isn’t heavy on the sci. And superhero movies are great but a lot of the tropes are meh. Fantasy has a lot more versatility if you ask me.

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

Sweatpants/leggings and a soft, well worn tee.

47. favorite type of cheese?

Parmesan, white cheddar, or Muenster.

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

Raspberry!

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

“do no harm but take no shit.”

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

A really poorly edited political ad on tv a couple years ago. There was weird jazz playing, flames in the background of an image of the Capitol Building, and then the top of the dome opened and this guy’s face was inside. It is the single funniest ad I have ever seen and I laughed for 10 minutes so hard I was like an inch away from passing out.

51. current stresses?

Passing my driving test next month, getting a job, figuring out if my math skills are okay enough to take the SAT or an equivalent test.

52. favorite font?

Baskerville or Georgia!

53. what is the current state of your hands?

My fingernails are short bc I picked them while reading earlier, my cuticles suck bc I pick at those two, and my pinky is obliterated and scabbed because of when I accidentally sliced through the nail with a razor while shaving the other day. So, not great, but I’m living.

54. what did you learn from your first job?

That kids can be really annoying but also really cute and hilarious if you can get them to calm down. And also that baby fingernails are surprisingly sharp.

55. favorite fairy tale?

The OG Princess and the Frog where it’s implied the prince and “faithful Henry,’ his carriage driver, fall in love and ride off together at the end. JACOB AND WILHELM GRIMM SAID GAY RIGHTS.

56. favorite tradition?

Every December, my mom and I drive around after dark at night and I play Pokemon and we rate everyone’s Christmas decorations based on tackiness.

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

So isolated I was as a preteen/early teenager, my self harm, and the internalized anger over my abusive relationship and PTSD.

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

Writing, puzzle solving, singing, and calligraphy.

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

“Benvoli-no.” (I recently remembered I used to say that a lot and I need to bring it back)

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

Dark, fairy tale anime with a lot of secrets to uncover and some dark woods.

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

TV show - “I am the Bad Wolf. I create myself.” - Doctor Who

Movie - “It’s not about deserve. It’s about what you believe. And I believe in love.” - Wonder Woman

Book - “If you never saw the stars, candles were enough.” - The Dream Thieves, by Maggie Stiefvater

62. seven characters you relate to?

Dean Winchester - Supernatural

Sam Winchester - Supernatural

Jack Kline Winchester - Supernatural

Charlie Bradbury - Supernatural

Gansey - The Raven Cycle

Blue Sargent - The Raven Cycle

Hermione Granger - Harry Potter

63. five songs that would play in your club?

Final Song // MO

Call Home // Heathers

I Am Here // Pink

Babylon // 5 Seconds of Summer

Shake It Off // Taylor Swift

64. favorite website from your childhood?

WEBKINZ AND THE OLD AMERICAN GIRL WEBSITE

65. any permanent scars?

Yes, I have several that remain from self harm, scars all over my left knee from being a clumsy child, and most of all a major scar down the center of my chest from heart surgery when I was a baby.

66. favorite flower(s)?

Rose, lavender, lilac, and dahlia.

67. good luck charms?

Not really???

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

Olives, mushrooms, radishes, cottage cheese, and ranch dressing are all foul.

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

Martin Luther didn’t actually nail his 95 theses to the church door, he just kind of passed them around, which is a lot less dramatic tbh. Also light-up signs were first used in New York City in 1884.

70. left or right handed?

I’m left-handed!

71. least favorite pattern?

I think zebra stripes, leopard print, and houndstooth are super ugly.

72. worst subject?

Math for sure. Even science would be easier if it didn’t involve so much math.

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

Wendy’s fries and chocolate frosty!!!

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

I think a 7, usually. My pain tolerance is pretty high because of a) years of self harm, and b) due to my PTSD my muscles are constantly tense and in pain anyway.

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

I was 4, and it had been loose but it fell out when I was trying to blow up an inflatable ball.

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

Fries or roasted potatoes that are charred and crunchy on the bottom. Chips are a close third.

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

Idk, my grandma’s the one with the green thumb mania lmao. But She keeps a lot of violets and arrowhead plants in the windowsills!

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

NEITHER I HATE BOTH COFFEE AND SUSHI IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES.

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

Never had a school ID, but my temporary license photo is actually pretty good right now!

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

I really like earth tones for myself.

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

THEY ARE THE SAME MF THING. Also I call them both, it just depends on what comes out of my mouth haha.

82. pc or console?

PC, I guess, though I don’t really game. I just watch my stepdad game.

83. writing or drawing?

WRITING. I cannot draw to save my life.

84. podcasts or talk radio?

Podcasts, talk radio is so annoying.

84. barbie or polly pocket?

Barbie, although I loved both.

85. fairy tales or mythology?

Mythology I guess??? Although again, I love both.

86. cookies or cupcakes?

COOKIESSSSS

87. your greatest fear?

Rejection, losing people I love, people secretly hating me. Also drowning, spiders, clowns, and guns.

88. your greatest wish?

To be a semi-successful author and work in a library/museum.

89. who would you put before everyone else?

My mom and my gf.

90. luckiest mistake?

Almost dropping a knife blade first on my foot but it landed between my toes.

91. boxes or bags?

um boxes I guess? I’m really good at fitting things in tetris style.

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

FAIRY LIGHTS AND DIM YELLOW LAMPS.

93. nicknames?

Ell, Alexander, Ellie, Little Lion, and Nerd.

94. favorite season?

FALL FALL FALL FALL

95. favorite app on your phone?

Tumblr or Spotify. Two apps I couldn’t live without.

96. desktop background?

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

About a half dozen. Mine, my mom’s, my stepdad’s, my grandparents’ home number, my grandpa’s, and my grandma’s.

98. favorite historical era?

Both the American Revolutionary period and the Victorian Era (esp in Britain)

THANK YOU LOVE THIS WAS SUPER FUN

[ivyandink]

1-50 Penny! hahaha but if u don’t wanna ill send specific ones :p

under the cut bc L O N G

How does your muse feel about seafood?She loves it! She loves trying new foods.

What is their favorite piece of technology?She isn’t super into techy stuff. Probably her laptop, since she does everything on it.

When did they lose their virginity?Hm, it was New Years Eve of their senior year of high school. So she would’ve been 17!

Was their anything their parents pushed them to do? (e.g. sports, theatre, band)Nothing really, but Clem did push her to do well academically!

Describe your muse’s worst nightmare.Losing her mom.

What is a deal-breaker when it comes to dating someone?Rude, impolite people! She’s too soft to be with a mean person lol

What was the most embarrassing moment in your muse’s life?When her and Clem moved back to San Myshuno, and she went back to public high school, kids there made fun of her because she was different/’weird’, and although it usually takes a lot to embarrass her, that did it lol. :(

What keeps your muse up at night?Everything! She is always in her head, with ideas, and dreams, and questions.

What chronic illnesses does your muse have, if any?None!

Does your muse get carsick?She does, because living primarily in the city, she never is really in cars (cough PLUS WE DONT HAVE THEM RIP cough)

Does your muse wear glasses/contacts?Nah, lucky binch got 20/20!!!!!

What are some warning signs that your muse is getting depressed? She stops actively engaging in life. When she was with Justin, as their relationship dynamic started taking a toll on her, she started participating in class less, putting off her homework, etc. She is usually pretty ‘on top of’ stuff, and she starts to lose that.

What is your muse’s favorite candy?She loves all things gummy- especially sour.

Does your muse have a “victory song” and if so, what is it?Jen DO YOU WANT ME TO RICKROLL YOU? lmao. Hmmm. I’ll keep going with the rest and think about this and come back to it lol.Edit: ok, I came back to this. And I wanna say.. Walking on Sunshine by Katrina and the Waves lol.

Who do they tend to bicker with the most?Her mom. lol. Although more so Clem bickering at Penny over something. Penny is pretty laid back, and is pretty unbothered by most things.

Has your muse ever been hospitalized or institutionalized? Nope.

Does your muse pray, whether it be to a god or some other force?Sometimes she does, she doesn’t really know what or who to. Answering that question is part of the things that keep her up at night! lol. She’s always wondering if there is something more, and if so, what it is.

Has your muse ever lived in poverty?No, she was actually more so upper middle class. 

Do they have any distinct voice mannerisms? (e.g. saying ‘like’ or ‘um’ a lot, stutters) She stutters a lot when she’s nervous. Although she tries to work on that.

Where are your muse’s ancestors from? Do they keep any of their traditions?I’ve never really thought about this question in real life terms lol in sim terms, Clem’s family is from Willow Creek LOL. No they do not have any old traditions.

When did your muse learn about sex?When she was pretty young, maybe 9 or 10? Margot, Colby’s daughter, always kept her in the loop with stuff lol. Plus her mom started talking to her about it from a young age, too.

What is your muse most thankful for?The strong, supportive women that have always played a big part in her life. 

What shoe size is your muse?Uhhh idk like a size 6 maybe??? lmao. She got small feet ok

Does your muse hate their middle name? \ What is it?Her middle name is June. She loves it, because it’s a family name.

How many hours a day do they spend on the internet/watching TV?Not very many. 

Does your muse have any trophies?Lol, aw, no :( Penny is not a very competitive type tho so its ok lol

If your muse was given the opportunity to go sky diving, would they?Oh definitely! She’d be nervous about it, and probably try and back out at the last second, and then jump, and love every second of it! Haha

What is the most common lie your muse tells themselves?She tells herself that she is small and weak, and too soft for her own good. She doesn’t see that sometimes softness is actually strength.

Has your muse ever had a pet? If so, what type?Yes! She has Basil, who is just a mixed breed cat she rescued :)

Who was your muse’s first kiss?O m g. Levi. Stop. I cry.

What is your muse’s first memory?Two of her oldest memories (bc im too extra to do just one): playing on the piano in her mom’s lap, and vague screaming matches between Clem and her father.

How does your muse feel about crocs?Loves ‘em. lol. Yikes.

What are your muse’s biggest pet peeves?Being cut off a lot. She already finds it difficult to make herself heard sometimes, so when people interrupt her a lot, it makes her annoyed and feel insignificant.

What was your muse’s happiest birthday?Her 13th birthday party! At the time, her and Clem were living with Colby and Margot. And they basically had one big girls sleepover to celebrate Penny finally being a “teenager” lol. Movies, popcorn, ice cream, nail painting. Clem even let her drink sparkling grape juice and pretend it was champagne. lol.

Does your muse cross their legs/ankles when they sit?Yes, she typically crosses her legs.

What simple task is your muse surprisingly bad at?Microwaving popcorn. The trick to not overcooking it is to listen patiently for the pops. But she almost always gets distracted or her mind wanders off somewhere, and she burns it lol.

Did your muse ever own a Tamagatchi?Nah

What was your muses’s first job?She didn’t technically get paid for it, but in high school, she volunteered at the library!

Does your muse usually go for truth or dare?Truth.

Has your muse ever been to a concert?Nope.

What is your muse’s favorite holiday?She loves Valentines Day because her and her mom were always each others Valentine :) aw

Does your muse reply to scary chain emails/messages?100%. lol.

Describe the first person your muse remembers losing.Hard to say. Because I want to say her dad, but she never really had him, so she didn’t really remember losing him. In her memories, he feels more like an apparition that a dad. And one day, that apparition just stopped showing up.

Would your muse ever roleplay?I’m gonna need more background on this lmao like sexually or like renaissance faire style or lol. Either way.. uh, probably yes. lmao

What is your muse’s Hogwarts house?Ravenclaw.

What is your muse’s first thought upon waking up?Usually trying to catch the last remnants of whatever dream she woke up from.

Name a song your muse can sing every word to. I never think about what kind of music my characters listen to in terms of real music lmao. But probably like. Anything by Bon Iver/Novo Amor.

Who would your muse sacrifice themselves for, if anybody?Probably her mom.

How long is your muse’s penis? || What bra size is your muse?LOL I was about to say uh she doesn’t have one??? But ok bra size, fair enough lol. Probably something small like a 32B idk she’s petite.

If your muse could rid the world of one thing, what would it be?Hateful people.

I DID IT JEN!! thanks for loving sweet penelope as much as i do

[surveysonfleek]

956.

grey;

x1 Has a rainy day ever ruined your plans? yep! nothing significant but i’ll usually be less enthusiastic.

x2 When was the last time you experienced a snow day, if ever? never.

x3 Do you think you could survive a month of solitary confinement? probably not. i think i’d go crazy unless i had a ton of books and a laptop filled with movies and tv shows with me.

x4 When was the last time you yawned? i don’t remember.

x5 What is something that you find utterly boring? waiting. for anything. food, friends, at the doctors etc.

x6 What noise|sound can put you to sleep? nothing? i need absolute silence. x7 When you are upset, do you tend to shut others out? yeah unless i’m trying to distract myself. i’ll usually talk to someone else that has nothing to do with the situation. x8 Do you often start books, yet never finish them? alwaysssss. lately, anyway. x9 When was the last time you felt abandoned by someone? i’m not sure. it’s been awhile. x1o What do you feel like, typically, when you wake up in the morning? tired.

red;

x1 Does anything small tick you off? Like what? people with no manners.

x2 Does the sight of blood gross you out? only if i see it in real life. 

x3 Do you like red roses, or do you prefer another color? i prefer other flowers tbh. 

x4 What is something you like to eat that is red? candy.

x5 Do you look good in this color? i don’t look good in it all the time, but i do like it.

x6 When you’re angry, do you literally see red? no.

x7 Have you ever gone through a red light? yes. unintentionally.

x8 Do you fail to stop for stop signs, sometimes? i usually always stop.

x9 What is one of your major turn-offs? bad hygiene.

x1o Is this one of your favorite colors, by any chance? i like it but not my fave.

blue;

x1 When was the last time you were near the ocean? last week.

x2 What is your favorite eye color in the opposite sex? brown.

x3 When was the last time you felt glum? today.

x4 Do you know anyone who has depression|is depressed? not personally. if i do, it’s not openly known.

x5 Have you personally ever felt depressed? i have.

x6 When you are sad, do you cheer yourself up, or look to others? i wouldn’t say i try to cheer myself up... i try distracting myself more of giving myself time to get over it.

x7 During which year of your life were you the most unhappy? 2008.

x8 Have you ever seen a bluejay in person? i feel like i have. one of the first times i visited usa i commented how pretty that bird was and my cousin told me it was a blluejay.

x9 Have you ever consumed a blue-colored drink? yep! gatorade and alize.

x1o Would this color look good on you? depends on the shade.

green;

x1 Is there anything you recycle, or should recycle? yeah, our household recycles.

x2 Do you like leaves better in the summer|spring, or in the fall? fall.

x3 What is your favorite aspect of life? getting to a point where you’re satisfied in the direction you’re heading... still haven’t reached that stage.

x4 When was the last time you were purposely amongst nature? err... nearly two weeks ago.

x5 Do you care about Mother Earth? to an extent.

x6 What do you think of global warming & the greenhouse effect? i’m aware of it but haven’t really done much about it...

x7 Do you wear the color green often? no.

x8 Do you like the appearance of green eyes? yes!

x9 Have you ever eaten grass|leaves? probably!

x1o Do you typically like green-colored candies? it all depends on the scent for me, colour doesn’t matter.

orange;

x1 Who is the most energetic and happy person you know of? atilla.

x2 Who makes you smile the most often? my boyfriend.

x3 How do you express your happiness? idk how to say it. just my general body language.

x4 Are you affectionate? In what ways, if so? eh, sometimes. obviously only to people i like.

x5 When was the last time you did a good deed? today.

x6 Has someone helped you out in a big way, recently? yes.

x7 What songs make you happy? i’m blanking out. but for the most part, my 2018 playlist.

x8 Do you like to sing?  yes even though i suck.

x9 Where is somewhere that holds fond memories for you? san francisco :)

x1o Do you like to watch the setting|rising sun? yes.

black;

x1 Do you know of anyone who is going down the wrong track? sure do.

x2 Have you ever hit rock bottom? feeling like i have lately.

x3 Is there anything you are obsessed with or addicted to? not really.

x4 Do you wear a lot of black clothing? yes. darker clothes in general.

x5 What do you think of the gothic stereotype? no opinion. but tbh i haven’t seen many of them around in forever.

x6 Have you ever encountered a black widow? i’ve seen some at the zoo.

x7 What scares you, more than anything else? the future.

x8 If there was no afterlife, could you handle it? yeah. it’s not something i like to think about anyway.

x9 Have you ever listened to Stairway to Heaven backwards? haha yeah, there were a ton of videos about it. still freaks me out.

x1o What is your favorite color for a pair of pants? black.

yellow;

x1 Do you like going out in the sun? during the right weather, yes.

x2 When in life did you feel the most care-free? usually while i’m traveling.

x3 Do you smile at people you don’t know? sometimes.

x4 Are you well-hydrated? Do you like water? not lately. but yes, i love water.

x5 Has an animal ever peed on you? yes. a fucking rabbit.

x6 What is a color you don’t think you look good in? neon colours haha.

x7 What would make a cool substitute color for the sun? pink!

x8 What does the color yellow remind you of? the sun.

x9 Do you think yellow is an ugly color to paint a room? only if it’s all four walls. it’d make a nice feature wall.

x1o What is something near you that is yellow? my lamp.

purple;

x1 Which do you prefer: purple or pink? pink.

x2 Does purple remind you of royalty? slightly.

x3 What is your favorite color of the sunset|sunrise? orange/yellow/pink.

x4 Is there a color you just hate? nah.

x5 Do you think guys look good in purple?  it’s not something i’ve noticed.

x6 Is purple a good color for a car? depends on the shade.

x7 Do you prefer green or purple|red grapes? green.

x8 What is something you like that is sour? i don’t really like sour things at all lol.

x9 What color do you think goes good with purple? black.

x1o What color is your birthstone? turquoise.

[365-money-diary]

DAYS 15-21

DAY FIFTEEN [JAN 15]

8:40 AM - Wake up feeling sore AF. I should’ve stretched after playing, but I obviously didn’t. I also feel like my stomach didn’t eat itself from the inside out while I was sleeping so that’s nice too. Make a chemex and get to work.

10:00 AM - eat plant yogurt.

11:00 AM - eat a few carrots and a clementine.

12:30 PM - make a greek salad for lunch with a La Croix - this is the last of the salad ingredients until Thursday essentially. Shed a singular tear.

3:00 PM - I am a tiny bit hungry. Eat a piece of rye toast.

4:14 PM - I wanted to start working out 45 minutes ago ugh. OK here we go. The hour goes by a lot faster than I expected which is nice. Rinse off and cook an early dinner – Reubens and potatoes.

8:00 PM - I wanted to drink alcohol but I’m too full from dinner to even enjoy it. Heat up chamomile tea instead. I want to work on my blog but K wants to hang instead and I’m in no position to deny the closeness. We play some Mario Kart, watch 30 for 30 about BC and the mob, and turn in early.

DAY FIFTEEN TOTAL: $0

DAY SIXTEEN

8:30 AM - Make chemex and eat a clementine. My sister (S) asked me and my brother (B) to listen to a 20 minute session on the app Mined about codependency. I take a stab at it and get some good notes. 

10:00 AM - Landscaper is going to show up any second so I move my car and pick up dog poop. Text with S more about my cousin’s virtual baby shower tomorrow and go in on some cute stuff from PBKids. Total is $64.05 and she venmos me $32. $32.05

11:15 AM - I actually have a lot of stuff I need to do this weekend though right now I’m too annoyed at my neighbor to focus. Long story short – he has been wanting our dead grapefruit tree for like 6 months and keeps asking if he can cut it down. I said sure. But then he asked our landscaper to do it for him? It’s weird. I mostly don’t care because it’s gone, but the nerve he had to insert himself is wild. $120

12:00 PM - Make Tofu tacos for breakfast and make a to-do list of stuff I want to accomplish today. (post cauliflower leek soup, put away records, barre throw away things my mom has forced me to take out of her house over the years, wipe doors)

6:00 PM - Eat 2 rice cakes. I only manage to get the cauliflower leek soup up, put away the records, and throw away the stuff mom gave me. I think today ended up being a little bit overwhelming emotionally with the landscaper plus the codependency session so I’m kind of burnt. 

7:00 PM - Make pad thai for dinner. Can’t stop snacking on Swedish fish. Drink an old fashioned while K and I watch Night Stalker. Realize part way through that the reason I keep eating Swedish Fish is because something feels off. I fall asleep around 11:30 knowing it’s my blood pressure and that if it doesn’t fix over night I’ll get right to it in the morning.

DAY SIXTEEN TOTAL: $152.35

DAY SEVENTEEN

8:00 AM - Wake up feeling like I’ve been hit by a bus. Ugh. I’ve been struggling with an iron deficiency for a while and have it mostly fixed but I still have occasional days where my blood pressure really gives me issues. 

9:00 AM - Peel myself out of bed and drink some soy sauce. Sounds disgusting but sodium is the only thing that truly helps AND it works fast. Drink a chemex and a boat load of water. Work on posting the cauliflower leek soup

10:00 AM - S calls and I take a walk to chat. I’m still feeling really down from the blood pressure but I know walking will help. It’s actually really nice to get outside. I should do this again later tonight.

11:00 AM - More soy sauce, more water, more coffee. Have a good direction for where I want to go today. Just taking it one task at a time based on how I feel and granting myself the grace.

12:30 PM - Feel good enough to start moving which is great because once I can get over the initial fog with this blood pressure stuff, moving is what keeps me feeling better. Wipe down the doors and then attend a virtual baby shower for my cousin E. 

3:00 PM - Make broccoli fried rice for lunch. I prefer the cauliflower but the store was out of it. I feel like this broccoli stuff would taste great with some kind of cilantro hummus situation but that’ll be for another day I suppose.

3:30 PM - Back to cleaning! The bathrooms are always terrible and today is no exception. It’s always hard to tell if I even make progress because everything is white and the grout is stained orange. Give up after an hour and a half.

6:30 PM - Tag team folding a couple loads of laundry with K while we watch NBA. This week ends bittersweet for my fantasy team. He beat me in one but I’m in first place in the other. Officially 3-1 and 4-0.

8:00 PM - Eat leftover pad thai for dinner.

DAY SEVENTEEN TOTAL: $0

DAY EIGHTEEN

8:30 AM - Wake up feeling like I was hit by a smartcar, so a little better! Today is MLK day and I’m grateful for the extra day off. Make a Chemex, drink some soy sauce, and watch an episode of The Challenge. Pure barre charge comes thru. $15

9:30 AM - Get started on dusting the entire house. It’s been a few weeks since I’ve done this due to lack of Swiffer 360 dusters. It takes forever but honestly our house hasn’t looked this good in years. Swap out the lightbulbs in the bathrooms and the bedroom, shower, and eat a plant yogurt.

11:30 AM - Have a sibling zoom call with S&B I walk while we chat and it’s honestly really nice to get outside. 

1:30 PM - Start shooting my recipe for lasagna rollups. Eat a cup of cauliflower leek soup and a few pretzel rods while I cook. It takes a while but I think they turn out great.

4:00 PM - Eat a lasagna roll and watch an episode of The Challenge. I haven’t worked out in 400 years (read: yesterday and the day before.) and it’s low key killing me, so I suit up and do the thing.

6:00 PM - That was mildly painful. Low cal burn, couldn’t focus to save my life - new moves so lots of pausing during transitions. Oh well. At least I did it.

7:00 PM - Eat two more lasagna rolls for dinner. K and I watch Terrorism Close Calls and I drink a vodka + vanilla seltzer + orange peel.

DAY EIGHTEEN TOTAL: $15

DAY NINETEEN

8:30 AM - It’s appraisal day. Ugh. So excited to get this over with. Make a chemex and open my work stuff. I have a lot to do but have a feeling I won’t be able to concentrate very well until after the appraisal is over. On a nice note - I am feeling leaps and bounds better from yesterday and the day before. 

10:00 AM - Eat a plant yogurt and finish out the rest of my coffee. Meet with my teammates about an outstanding task and then do the random stuff around the house to prep for my appointment.

12:00 PM - Here goes nothing! K and I leave the house with KP and walk her around the block a few times until the appraisal is done. As much as I feel like my anxiety should be gone, it’s not. I think particularly because today is really busy with work. K and I hang out outside on our laptops for a bit to let the house air out before going back inside.

1:00 PM - Eat broccoli fried rice for lunch with a Polar seltzer. Snack on a pretzel rod and some Swedish Fish while it heats.

3:00 PM - Eat the last of the cauliflower leek soup and a few carrots.

5:30 PM - Make a nuun and do a barre live stream. My focus today is so much better but my cal burn is abysmal again. Rinse off and heat up lasagna rolls for dinner. Snack on Swedish Fish while they heat. I really wish I had wine right now because I can feel my body could use the extra help blood pressure-wise but I won’t get my alcohol delivery until Thursday. Sigh.

8:00 PM - Idk whats up but my body is asking for more food so I eat tortilla crumbs and salsa and some dark chocolate. Make vegan ham brine for seitan. Realize I’m out of liquid smoke and buy a 6 pack from Amazon. $15.37

9:30 PM - It’s official, this iron thing is killing me. Ugh. Now I know. I’ll be more conscientious of my supplements, I promise! Finish editing photos of Thousand Island Dressing, watch The Challenge and call it a day.

DAY NINETEEN TOTAL: $15.37

DAY TWENTY

8:30 AM - Still feeling off from iron. This is seriously the worst it’s been in MONTHS. Worst part - it takes 4 weeks for you to produce new blood cells so I can only assume this will happen again since there was a substantial gap in my supplementing.

9:00 AM - Make a chemex, prep the seitan ham dough and bake. I chat with Google support for an account I’m having problems with. The person’s name is Swastika. Feels like a bad omen for inauguration day. Eat 2 clementines and pretzel rod.

12:20 PM - Starving. Decide on Lasagna roll ups for lunch with a Polar. 

2:00 PM - Finish my work for the day. I have on my list of things to do that I want to test this orange spice bread for the blog.

3:00 PM - Spice bread in the oven. Do a round of dishes to prep for tonight’s grocery run. It doesn’t come out great and I eat two slices.

5:15 PM - Do a barre live stream and it goes really well. Super focused, super strong, super sweaty. One more class to go for the challenge this month! Rinse off and continue prepping the kitchen and do the final bake on the ham. 

7:05 PM - Ensue grocery madness. Incoming of onions, bananas, lemons, limes, bell peppers, cucumbers, cheese, cheeze, tortilla chips, tomatoes, dark chocolate, green beans, broccoli, jalapeños, low carb tortillas, bread, oranges, potatoes, cilantro, chickpeas, romaine, celery, clementines, spring mix, frozen burritos, apples, oat milk, tofu, soyrizo, brussels sprouts, eggs, grapes, frozen peas, vegan sour cream, taco seasoning, tomato paste, chipotle peppers in adobo sauce, corn, black beans, avocados, mushrooms, snap peas, pineapple, vegan mayo, carrots, rice noodles, seltzer, beets, cauliflower, parsley, pumpkin seeds, thyme, plant yogurt, garlic, riced broccoli, white rice, gf pretzels, micro arugula, & black olives. $327.69

8:15 PM It takes over an hour, but everything is washed and put away! Make air fried broccoli with miso butter and veggie sandwiches for dinner. 

9:00 PM - Make a crappy drink with flavored vodka. The only thing I have in my house is shooters left over from my sister’s bachelorette party. She’s now divorced if that gives you any idea of how long this stuff has been sitting around. More alcohol comes tomorrow at least! Eat a few Swedish fish.

9:30 PM - Play Mario Kart, watch The Challenge, and call it a night.

DAY TWENTY TOTAL: $327.69

DAY TWENTY-ONE

8:30 AM - Chemex and work. Alcohol is coming sometime this AM from my friend J who has a wholesale hookup. Much like everything else in the pandemic, I just buy in bulk. It’s easier that way!

10:30 AM - Eat a slice of orange spice bread for breakfast. It’s definitely growing on me but I think I need to adjust a few things before shooting/posting. J drops off my booze order. I got 2 crates of wine (24 bottles total), a bottle of bourbon, rye, mezcal, rum, and st. germaine. She says it was $400 but I pay her more. $450

11:00 AM - Start prepping chile de arbol salsa & stuff for this week’s salad - spring mix, roasted tofu with taco seasoning, avo, chipotle ranch dressing, cilantro, green onion, black beans, tomatoes and corn. YUM. Eat salad with a La Croix. 

3:00 PM - I get the appraisal back! My house came in at $390k. (I bought it for $245k) OMG! Eat a celebratory slice of orange bread.

6:45 PM - Finish class 15/15 for the barre challenge. 11 more months to go. hah! Rinse off, roast potatoes for veggie sandwiches. Pour a celebratory glass of wine. 

8:30 PM - Pour another half glass. What a week! End up going on a walk with K & KP which was really nice. I need to get out more. This weekend I will. Stay tuned. ~*~*~

DAY TWENTY-ONE TOTAL: $450

[skeletrender]

so i uh, met someone

a few weeks ago, i played some “electronic” “music” in front of people, for money, for the first time. there was a gal in the front row who i didn’t know but who really loved what i did. I wanted to talk with her more, but a bunch of my friends were there and loads of ppl wanted to talk to me and so i just hoped she’d be there later. she was (turns out she was one of the organizers), we talked a lot in a group setting, which was so rad (‘whence rap-rock?’) (i overheard her and the presenter arguing over who should have spring rolls, and my hungry ass intervened like if y’all both don’t want em i’ll eat em right now), and we exchanged fb info and started talking about hanging out.

she kept saying “i’m trying to think of ideas for stuff to do together” and, privately, i was like ‘lol is this a date?’ and then she sent me this honestly massive and well-reasoned/thought-out list of stuff we could do (pros and cons, y’all!) and i just... kinda panicked lol. told my friends the story and they were like ‘uhhh wow, Yeah’ like ohhhh gosh

yesterday afternoon (sunday, 05/29/17) she came over for the first time. we made lunch (beans and rice leftovers, and miso soup i made that morning, and grapes that she brought), then we talked about what we wanted to do that day... while like, staring at each other and blushing.

We talked about so much, too. Both of our medical stuff (during which i came out as trans to her - complaining abt my dr wanting too much bloodwork), families, exes, all sorts of stuff. It was all rly deep but... so easy and chill? she noticed an agate point my friend daisy gave me, and i showed her my rock collection, and we, no lie, scrolled through my /tagged/rocks (which works more like a search on mobile btw), because pretty rocks.

her idea which i liked the most (she had several) was to drive along the bayou, and see what we could find - parks, industrial sites, construction sites, etc. i remembered that some time back, i had volunteered to plant wildflowers along one of the bayous, so we decided to go see how they were doing.

aaaand i got lost. i turned too soon, realized it, went down the wrong street, realized it, saw some flowers on what i assumed was the wrong bayou bank, then went back the first way but for longer, then gave up (we both spent the whole time poking fun at how frustrated i was getting, lol) ... and found myself at a familiar intersection. “okay... if we don’t find it this time, we’ll go back and like, watch a movie or something.” “deal.”

and then there was the pavilion! and there were the flowers we saw! We got out and walked over to the bayou bank, enjoyed the cool breeze - by this point it was early evening - and sat down among the flowers. There were a bunch of dfferent kinds - some purple, some yellow/orange. I don’t know whose idea it was to put flowers in each others’ hair, but we both braided a couple in near each others’ ears. I got a picture but my phone died before it could save.

we had passed by a local herb garden (part of the larger park, which we had been at) on our way there, and decided to stop in. She led me around and pointed out fruits and veggies growing... there were a few nearly-ripe grape tomatos near the top of one plant, so i got up on the raised bed and snagged them. Mine was super sour and still green inside - she ate half of hers and gave the rest to me?? Wow.

The park was closing, so we started heading out, and then she spotted a bunny, chilling and eating grass. She got a video of it, she sent me it later, it was super cute (the video, and also watching her take the video). I’ll post it if she gives me permission (it is her video, after all).

On our way out we decided on pizza for dinner. There’s a chain around town that does personal (7″ or 11″) pizzas with as many toppings as u want for one price. We decided to split the larger size - she was okay with vegan, i was okay with gluten-free. I had been complaining about the texture of gluten free pastries (especially pizza dough), so she started ribbing me abt how “worried” she was that it would be “boring” compared to the regular dough. It was not. It was better. I’m never not getting that dough again.

We went back to my place, ate grapes, and chatted, and cuddled??? Oh my goodness. It got late and it started raining, so she had to go back home. She didn’t want to leave and i didn’t want her to go. I was nervous until she got home, on account of the rain and her being tired.

That was DAY ONE.

She came over again this afternoon after work. I met up with her at a nearby coffeeshop, and we hung out there for a while talking some more. We ate literally the same stuff, and then like... the plan was to watch a movie, which we eventually got around to doing. After more talking, and blushing, and and and... and browsing netflix and filmstruck for a good bit. 

We watched a film noir that was... weirdly sexist? Like this rich old dude kept assuming more and more of a role in this young working woman’s life, more and more of a say in how she lived. We cuddled a heck of a lot. And before the end.... we wred smoooochinG????? she kissed me?????????? holly heck. holy heck. wow.

she told me i had really pretty legs... “like doe’s legs. like a faun” and i was just. floored.

she’s such a great kisser, too. and She,, kissed ME?? when has that happened in the history of literature. goodness.

she loves the way i say “heck yeah” when i get excited abt little things... she loves when i get excited in general.

i kinda wanna make my blog an aesthetic blog bc she has the url and idk i don’t want her to see like callout posts and shit

and she’s coming over AGAIN, TOMORROW. wow. wowww.

[cookinguptales]

AHHHHH I love your writing and your opinions, you just seem like such a cool person

OH this does have a heart! weird, it wasn’t in the notif I got. ah well, whatever, here’s a valentine! It’s karabita because lbr I think that’s what 90% of my anons are here for! If you don’t like karabita, thennn idk send me another ask with some instructions haha.

(look, did I promise anyone a good valentine? no, I promised people ugly valentines made in free programs, and I promised bad puns.)

PS THANK YOU YOU SOUND SWEET TOO I just said that people should send me hearts BUT PEOPLE ARE FILLING MY INBOX WITH SWEET NOTHINGS ;o; my followers are perf

I just wanted to see if I could go more sugary sweet than the last one and SPOILERS I sure as heck can! (I’m so sorry.)

There was one thing to know about Matsuno Karamatsu, and this was key — if a person was fool enough to fall in love with him, they had to learn to roll with the punches. Life with Karamatsu was a roller coaster, up and down, good and bad, sweet and sour in turn. And after twenty-odd years of friendship, two years of dating, and a year and a half of marriage, well. Chibita liked to believe that he was prepared for anything and everything.

Valentine’s Day in particular was a trial. Even after all this time, Karamatsu still seemed to think that Chibita needed to be swept off his feet. Or rather, Karamatsu still believed he deserved to be. It was hard to stay mad when he put it like that, even when he set fire to the bed or got lost in the Amazon rain forest or crash landed a heart-shaped hot air balloon into their apartment building. (They really had needed to upgrade to a bigger place, but Chibita would have liked to have parted on kinder terms with the landlord.) Yeah. V-Day was hard.

So when Chibita walked into their home that evening, knowing full well that Karamatsu had asked him to close up early, he was going over the list of emergency phone numbers in his head. It never hurt to be prepared. But there was no blood. No frightened animals. No scent of singed hair on the evening breeze. Just Karamatsu, standing there in their living area and smiling at him. He’d poured wine — no doubt that ungodly sweet stuff that was only half a step above grape juice — and had cleared space in the center of the living area. He was wearing clothes, though, and not even that tight leather stuff that Chibita had once pulled a muscle getting him out of. So it wasn’t some kind of terrifying experimental sex that he wanted to try. Again.

(Chibita had actually quite liked that one.)

“So what’s this?” Chibita asked, stepping inside and setting aside the flowers he’d brought home for later. They could probably wait until after Karamatsu was so excited about.

Karamatsu rocked up onto his heels and looked utterly pleased with himself. “We’re going dancing,” he said.

“Dancing?” Chibita stopped short. Like, in front of people?

“Well,” Karamatsu said, likely interpreting the look of horror on Chibita’s face correctly, “We’re staying in and dancing.”

Staying in? That was a little better, at least. Still. Chibita frowned. “I don’t know how to dance.” At least, not in any kind of special, romantic way. He could hop up and down with the best of them, but that didn’t exactly take rhythm. Or grace.

“I know,” Karamatsu said, and wow, ouch. But he was still smiling, the silly thing. “That’s why I went to lessons. So I could teach you.”

If anything, Chibita’s frown just got deeper. “You went to dancing lessons?” Chibita asked. “Alone?” As in, without his husband? Was there someone out there that Chibita was going to have to kill?

“Don’t worry, my love,” Karamatsu said, walking forward and taking Chibita’s hands in his. “It was strictly business. I could never make such sweet music with anyone but you.”

The little ‘gross’ was on the tip of Chibita’s tongue, and a few years ago, he probably would’ve said it. But today he just went a little rosy and shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “So you danced with…”

Karamatsu shrugged. “Lots of people. They drew straws every week.”

“To decide who got to dance with you?” Chibita asked, raising an eyebrow.

Karamatsu’s gaze went distinctly shifty. “Something like that.” Ah. So they’d drawn straws to see who had to dance with him. That seemed a little more realistic.

Chibita felt his lips turn up, both unable and unwillingly to stop them, and he smiled at Karamatsu a little helplessly before he stood up on his toes to kiss him. “So?” he asked. “What’d you learn?”

Karamatsu’s expression went a little dreamy for a moment, one of the many hazards of kissing him, and it stayed that way until he managed to catch a kiss of his own. “I know that you put your hand here,” Karamatsu said, putting Chibita’s hand up on his shoulder, “and mine goes down here.”

It was a little awkward like that, Karamatsu’s hand on his waist. The height difference was just a lot. But no one else was around to see, were they? It was just the two of them. “Hmm,” Chibita said, pitching the hum a little playful. “Isn’t there supposed to be music for this?”

Karamatsu pulled his phone out of his pocket and waggled it back and forth. Not so high tech, but hey. Whatever worked. Karamatsu hit a button, and when he tucked his phone back into his pocket, there was a soft tune spilling from its speakers. It sounded old and it sounded foreign and it sounded a little bit like it was drifting in from a dream. Chibita liked it.

“And then you just step like — oof.”

Well, that part hadn’t gone well.

“Idjit!” Chibita said. “You have to tell me what to do before we do it!” Or else the two of them were gonna end up with a lot of bruises.

“Okay!” he said. “Okay. Just… Take your right — no, your other right, my right, that one—“

They made it one step this time, two steps, before they ended up in a crumpled heap on the floor.

“You’re really heavy,” Chibita said with no real heat to his words, and gave him a little shove. Really, really heavy.

Karamatsu looked down at his middle a little self-consciously as he stood up. “Heavy?” he asked, extending a hand to Chibita.

Chibita took it. “Not, like… You’re fine, Karamatsu, that’s not what I meant,” he said, and fought the urge to roll his eyes. He was fairly certain that he still showed Karamatsu how attracted to him he was on a very, very regular basis. “Just big.”

Karamatsu gave him a look that was wholly unimpressed. “Or you’re just small.”

And it really was a good thing that he paired that with another kiss, an absolutely spine-melting one. Otherwise Chibita definitely would have had to give him what-for. Eventually.

He pulled back, simultaneously too late and too soon for Chibita’s peace of mind. It was just a bit, though, and Chibita still fit so nice in his arms, and he was still so warm. Chibita leaned his head forward so he could rest his forehead against his chest and smell the fresh beginnings of exertion. The soft strains of an old song were still drifting through the air, and Chibita felt his heart beat in time with the music. “Maybe we could just… Y’know, like this?” he asked.

Above him, he heard Karamatsu make a very put-out noise. “But I learned the steps.”

“Fuck the steps.”

“It was just one little fall. I fell lots of times in class.”

“I bet,” Chibita said, and muffled his snickers in Karamatsu’s soft, soft shirt. He’d always liked this shirt. Good for snuggling. “But would you rather fall, or would you rather dance with me?”

Karamatsu didn’t say anything for a moment. Just breathed in and out with the music and rubbed his fingertips soft against Chibita’s sides. Then he pulled Chibita in close, even closer, and rested his lips against his scalp. “Just like this, then.”

And just like that, hugging, swaying, probably looking like absolute fools, Chibita felt his heart beat sweet in his chest. For all his idiosyncrasies, Karamatsu had always, always been able to give him that. “Love you,” Chibita murmured, and words that had scared him shitless not that long ago now felt just right as they left his lips.

He felt Karamatsu swallow. “I love you, too, my darling. More than anything.”

And hell, Chibita knew that was probably just about the truth. He was certainly at least tied for first place. Karamatsu had definitely at least wreaked havoc on some poor unsuspecting dance instructor for him. And maybe later, when the air wasn’t smooth as silk and heavy as honey, when Chibita could stand to let go of him again, when the music had gone quiet and Chibita had finished showing him exactly how much he appreciated these quietly sweet plans, maybe then Karamatsu could show him a few moves.

In the meantime, though. In the meantime. Chibita sighed and tucked his nose in against Karamatsu’s breast. In the meantime, he was fine right here.

At least until Karamatsu cleared his throat. “Can I still dip you?”

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #177

“i get pretty just to fuck my face up.”

What’s your favorite flavor of ice pop? Strawberry or watermelon. Do you like animal print? What’s your favorite print? Not particularly, but I suppose jaguar. What do you think of foot tattoos? Surprisingly, not a big fan. It's gotta be cute, well-placed, and small. Did your senior class in high school have a class trip? Where did you go? Maybe? I don't remember. What do you normally order at Dunkin Donuts? Chocolate frosted. What do you drink with dinner? It varies. Can be soda, water, milk... Peanuts or sunflower seeds? I don't like either. What is your favorite grocery store to shop at, and how often do you shop for groceries? Sam's Club totally has the best deals, but I don't make the shopping calls here. Who is your favorite character from the last movie you watched? Uhhh the super paranoid lady whose actress is a legend. Where did you have your first kiss? What about your last kiss? His bed; airport. What is the last thing you spoke to your father about? Phone bill. Who do you feel you have the most in common with? Sara. Who in your life causes you the most stress or negative feelings? Myself. Have you ever apologized to someone, but didn’t mean it? I'm sure at some point. What is the one thing that you can’t resist? Reese's, I sometimes cannooooot tell myself no to a Mtn. Dew Voltage, wanting to pet an animal even if it's dangerous, and uhhh I'm sure there's more. Have you ever done another person's homework for money? No. If you could play any piece of music on an instrument, what would it be? Teach me the ending piece from WKM on the piano so I could ruin myself further than just listening to it already does. Have you ever treated someone like they were nothing? I don't believe so. If you could ask 5 questions and get an exact answer, what would you ask? Oh yikes, deep one. Um... 1.) what is the cure for cancer, 2.) cure for Alzheimer's/dementia, 3.) cure for HIV/AIDS, 4.) how can/is it even possible to obtain world peace, and 5.) will I be stable in the future are what come to mind first. Does it frighten you when animals get into fights? I GET VERY SCARED FOR THE ANIMALS. When you were little did you touch just about everything in the store? YUP YUP YUP. Do you ever leave your drinks out in the open at a party? N/A, but I absolutely would not. Ever suffered from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder? Yes. Who is someone you’ll always hate? No one I personally know. How many people do you trust 100 percent? Just one. I would include Mom, but I know she lies about Dad. Do you think you could survive a month of solitary confinement? NO, I really think I'd lose it and kill myself. Do you often start books, yet never finish them? I don't read, but I'd do that if I didn't like it. When was the last time you felt abandoned by someone? Idr. Does the sight of blood gross you out? No. Have you ever gone through a red light? No. Do you fail to stop for stop signs, sometimes? No. What is your favorite eye color in the opposite sex? Blue. When you are sad, do you cheer yourself up, or look to others? It depends, but I usually begin with the former. During which year of your life were you the most unhappy? 2016 can been damned by God themselves. Have you ever seen a bluejay in person? Yes. Have you ever eaten grass/leaves? Probably as a kid. Do you typically like green-colored candies? Yeah! Apple flavor is the bomb.com. Who is the most energetic and happy person you know of? Ryder, my nephew. Who makes you smile the most often? Sara Jane. :') How do you express your happiness? I'm louder, more talkative, goofier. When was the last time you did a good deed? Uhhh idk. It's a tiny thing, but I suppose you could count me getting my old man bub with arthritis up on the bed when he wanted up. What songs make you happy? Lots... Do you like to sing? Sometimes, but I'm not good at it. Where is somewhere that holds fond memories for you? Ummm the little pond behind the community college where we took our first prom photos. That whole day was just extremely magical, and passing it is a severe PTSD trigger so if for whatever reason we're driving past there, Mom goes around it. I did pass it a few months back when I was taking pictures of flowers around the college and I was okay, probably because I didn't even glance at it. What do you think of the gothic stereotype? # A E S T H E T I C Have you ever encountered a black widow? Yup. What scares you, more than anything else? Ending up alone/losing all those I love. Has an animal ever peed on you? Lol yeah...  Pet rodents have multiple times when getting them accustomed to being held, a puppy probably has, and Venus (my snake) did once after I held her for like an hour, aha. Couldn't be mad at that angel, she was obviously so comfy. What would make a cool substitute color for the sun? Pink. Is purple a good color for a car? Sure. Do you prefer green or purple/red grapes? Purple; crisper. What is something you like that is sour? Warheads. What was the spiciest thing you’ve ever eaten? Some hot wings at BWW with one of the hottest sauces. When was the last time you had a real deep chat? Idk, I'm sure something with Sara. Who did you last see on webcam? I've no idea. Have you ever discovered something gross in your food at McDonalds? No. What’s your favorite flavor of Ramen? I only like the spicy chicken Yakisoba ones. Have you ever spent the night in jail? No. Name a really popular television show you never got into: Ha, a lot. Game of Thrones, for one, but I'd be willing to give it a second chance via more episodes and a different attitude and actually kinda want to. Sara, add that to our list. Do you listen to any unsigned bands/singers? Who? No, I don't believe so. I need to start listening to my old friend's band, though, because I really want to support them; they work so hard and are very serious about taking their band somewhere. Nova Mortis if you're interested and like heavy metal. What do you find really interesting? THE PARANORMAL, for one. Genetics, psychology, fossils, abandoned buildings and shacks, natural selection and evolution, outer space, differences in languages and cultures, and so much more. Who is your favorite video game character? Spyro! What kind of pictures do you post on Facebook/Instagram/Snapchat most frequently? I like never post pictures, but selfies on FB, then I have two photography Instagrams. Do you remember the first person you felt sexually attracted to? Seriously, Jason. Have you ever been on vacation with a significant other? No. Is there anything on your bucket list that you’re hoping to cross off soon? A lot of things, but. Probably won't be soon as many include travel. Of all of your friends’ significant others, who do you get along with best? And least? Sam's wife Kieley is an absolute doll; least, idk. What would your life be like if you had married your first love? HAHAHAHAHA I REEEEEAAAAALLY DON'T WANT TO PICTURE THAT KNOWING NOW HE DIDN'T/DOESN'T BELIEVE IN ME AND CAN'T COMMUNICATE FOR SHIT. What is the most difficult or time-consuming thing you’ve ever cooked? Would you make it again? N/A Have you ever had a platonic friend that everyone insisted you should be in a relationship with? Girt, hardcore. Eventually did, but we know how that went. Is there anything about a person’s sexual past that might stop you from wanting to date them? Yup: if they've assaulted someone, prostitution is involved, casual flings/one-night stands have happened, being/have been a porn star, cheated before. If someone asked your closest friends/family members what career path might suit you best, what do you think they would say? Like, everyone will answer that question with "vet." Have you ever considered “unplugging”/taking a significant period of time away from technology? lol nope I doubt I'd last a day with no technology. Do you use a photo editor? Lightroom, Photoshop, sometimes PhotoScape. Is your dad overweight? Quite the opposite. Ever been honked at? Yeah. Which do you prefer, doctor or dentist? Dentist; I'm never nervous for them. Name two things you put whipped cream on? I haaaate whipped cream. Texture thing. Favorite thing you’ve ever painted? Two meerkats grooming, done on a huge thing of burlap. What’s your favorite type of sushi? Never tried, never will. Have you ever had an ulcer? No. What’s the name of the most recent baby a friend has had? Scarlett. Have you ever taken medication to help you fall asleep faster? Yup. I had a long insomnia streak where I physically couldn't sleep without Melatonin. What is your current favorite song? I'm hooked on "The Bottom is a Rock" by Mother Mother rn. If you had to move to another country, where would you move? Canada. Do you have a balcony? No. Are you jealous of anyone, even mildly? If so, who? Yeah, my sisters, as well as some real successful friends. Have you ever done a craft you saw in a magazine? No. Have you ever made a recipe you found in a magazine? No. Who is a singer that has given you chills? Celine Dion, Loreena McKennitt, Sebastian Bach, David Draiman, and Amy Lee off the top of my head. What act would you perform in a talent show? I wouldn't, I got nothin'. What area are you the most gifted in, do you think? Um... writing, I guess? Which style of wedding dress is your favorite? BALLGOWN BITCH Do you enjoy editing videos? Ye! Do you enjoy editing photos? Yup. Who do you think is the most attractive actor? I see u Jason Momoa. Have you ever been caught doing something REAL embarrassing by your parents? I don't believe so. Do you believe in reincarnation? No. Do you have any of your neighbors as friends on Facebook? No. When was the last time you thought about sex, or sexual things? Ummm within the past few days probably, at least briefly? Are there any flowers planted outside your house? We have a tall bush that sprouts big, pink flowers, if that counts. Does anyone in your family smoke? Dad. What was the very first election you voted in? I haven't yet. Do you have a drone? No. Are you the type that’s too ashamed to ask for or use directions? No, rather too shy. Were you tired when you woke up this morning? YEAH. I slept like shit and had to get up early for a VR assessment. You overhear two people gossiping about you; what do you do? I feel like I'd say something sarcastic to them. Or be more mature about it and ask why. Or cry. Are you proud of who you are? Eh, only in certain areas... Is your vision good? I can barely read the line below the big "E." So no lmao. Are you a legal adult? Yeah but idk how. Has anyone ever called you a flirt? No. What was the last compliment your received? The assessment lady at VR loved my hair. Do you know any sign language? No. Who was the last person to give you a gift? Sara, on our anniversary. Do you trust the media? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA BITCH NO. If you could kill off one species of animal, which would it be? Can gnats like????? not???????? Idk if they have a single useful function????????? What kind of cookies are your favorite? Chocolate chip. Who’d you last say I love you to? My mom. What’s the most overpaid job in your opinion? I'm not educated on this enough to give you an informed answer. What’s the last thing you wrote down? Working out a math problem during the assessment. When’s the last time you didn’t sleep in your own bed? Over a month ago. When’s the last time you heard a gunshot? Idk. Who’d you get mad at last? Myself. What’s the last thing that annoyed you? Bentley wouldn't listen. When’s the last time you gave someone advice? I think yesterday? Do you think you’re lucky, unlucky, or neither? Neither. Who did you last disappoint? Myself. Do you enjoy learning? Of course!!!! I mean there're subjects I have no interest in and don't enjoy, but learning as a whole is great. People say you learn something new every day, so what did you learn today? Well it was nothing big, but that I could return Miku before she got hurt since Mitsu didn't appreciate a new "buddy." Yes or no: eyebrow piercings? They can look super badass or awful depending on your face and eyebrow thickness imo. When I say The Beatles, what is the first song that comes to mind? "Yellow Submarine" even tho I hate that song???? In your opinion, what is the very worst type of weather? Hot and humid, especially with no breeze. Just no. You can only listen to 1 band for the rest of your life, who do you pick? DON'T MAKE ME. What is something that you had to learn the hard way? DON'T. THINK. A RELATIONSHIP. IS WITHOUT A SINGLE CHANCE. OF. SOMEONE. LEAVING. EVEN. IN THE MOST "SECURE" ONES. When was the last time you felt like your heart was actually breaking? Ahhhh I'm not sure. Either something with Mom or Sara. Who was the last person you cried in front of? Mom. If your ex called you right now, would you answer? I don't have his number, so I wouldn't answer. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? Sara. Do you want your tongue pierced? It is. 10/10 recommend for cute factor, but 0/10 for the healing process and pain asjfawiwo. Mine's through the very tip of my tongue and because that area is so sensitive, it was so painful that I became immediately nauseous. Pain didn't entirely vanish for almost two weeks. BUT I have zero regrets, so worth it. Is there something that happened in your past you hate talking about? Yeah. What’s one thing in your life that you wish you could change? Financial position. Have you ever been in a perfect relationship? Ha, don't ever believe those exist. Do you still talk to the person who broke your heart the most? Nope. Have you ever done something sexual that you regret? Ummm I don't believe so. Well, I don't know if I'd take back going all the way or whatever the fuck that was, maybe I would. idk Ever had a person who was obsessed with you so much that it scared you? No. Can you drive, and if you can, do you like it? I'm capable, but I don't enjoy it at all. Have you ever said anything to the last person you kissed that you regret? Yeah, being in a shit mood and/or being impulsive with my words. Do you like french fries? Who the FUCK sayin no to this. Have you ever ate so much you puked? No. Do you care about what others think of your physical appearance? To some degree/in certain aspects. Would you rather eat cookies or brownies? Probs brownies. Have you ever played a drinking game? Which ones? No. Are you good with managing your finances? I don't. Not in that position yet. What is the closest pizza place to your house? Domino's. Do you have any silly nicknames or pet names? Hmmmm no. Are you any good at drawing? Some things. Is there anything unusual about your house? No. Can you maintain a text conversation or do you run out of things to say? I think I'm good at keeping *text* convos going, surprisingly. Do you find it hard to talk to strangers, even people who work in stores? YEAH!!!!!!! Have you ever tasted goat’s milk? No. Did you ever take classes for a musical instrument when you were younger? Yup. Band member all through middle school, stopped after my junior year of HS. Do you snore when you sleep? No, but I talk a loooot. Who is the first person who broke your heart? Dad. Do you know anyone who has fought in a war? Jason's dad was in the Navy. What religion are you? Theist, which basically just entails me believing there's a god/goddess/some sorta beginning deity, but hell if I know anything about them. I make my own guesses. Who is the last person you gave a ride to, and where did you take them? I don't have a license or my own car. What is the last thing you untruthfully denied? Hm. I'm not sure. Have you ever ridden on a real train? No. Name ONE good memory about your last ex? He's absolutely hilarious and I miss hanging out more! Would you consider yourself dishonest? Not gonna bullshit and claim I never am, but in general, no. Do you tend to let people break through your walls easily? HAHA YEAH RIGHT. What are you superstitious about? Nothing. What is the coolest thing you can do? Oh boy, hell if I know. I know from experience people are often surprised how even skittish animals/pets seem to be drawn to me; does that count? Is there anyone you want to hook up with that you haven’t? Not my thing.

[urscottsdale]

1-100

1) What images do you have set for your desktop/cell phone wallpapers?My dog

2) Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?I’ve thought some of teachers were cute, but not really crushing on them cute.

3) What was your last text message?“just go take care it as soon as you can” from my mom 😂

4) What do you see yourself doing in 10 years?Hopefully living the life I want to live

5) If you could be anywhere else right now, where would you be?Europe

6) What was your coolest Halloween costume?Harry Potter

7) What was your favorite 90s show?Hey Arnold!

8) Who was your last kiss?She knows

9) Have you ever been stood up?No

10) Favorite ice cream flavor?Chocolate chip cookie dough

11) Have you been to Las Vegas?Nope, but I want to.

12) Your favorite pair of shoes?Vans

13) Honestly, have you ever cheated on your significant other?Yup I still feel terrible about it

14) What is your favorite fruit?Grapes

15) Have you talked to anyone on tumblr that you could see yourself dating/having sex with? If possible?Yup

16) Are you into hookups? Short or long term relationships?Depends and long term

17) Do you smoke? If so, what?Nope

18) What do you do to get over your anger?Lots of things but usually none of them good

19) Do you believe in God?Yes

20) Does the person you’re in love with know it? Nope cause I’m not “in love” with anybody. Unless my dog counts, then yes, he knows.

21) Favorite position?I have many favorite positions 😏

22) What’s your horoscope sign?Scorpio

23) Your fears?Not having a future that makes me happy

24) How many pets do you have? What kind?One dog

25) What never fails to turn you on?Someone who wants me as much as I want them

26) Your idea of a perfect first date?I don’t have an idea of a perfect first date. I like to be spontaneous.

27) What is something most people don’t know about you?Idk there’s a lot probably

28) What makes you feel the happiest?Talking to her

29) What store do you shop at most often?Probably the grocery store tbh 😂

30) How do you feel about oral? Giving and/or receiving?Love it. Yes and yes.

31) Do you believe in karma?Yes

32) Are you single?Yes

33) Do you think flowers or candy are a better way to apologize?For me, I’d rather have candy.

34) Are you a good swimmer?I’m alright

35) Coffee or Tea?Coffee, unless the tea is sweet.

36) Online shopping or shopping in person?Online

37) Would you rather be older or younger than your current age?Younger

38) Cats or Dogs?Dogs

39) Are you a competitive person?Very

40) Do you believe in aliens?Yes

41) Do you like dancing?Yes but I’m not very good at it hahaha

42) What kind of music to you listen to?Pretty much everything, but country is definitely my favorite.

43) What is your favorite cartoon character?Tommy Pickles

44) Where are you from?Texas

45) Eat at home or eat out?Both

46) How much more social are you when you’re drunk?Depends but I usually don’t get drunk

47) What was the last thing you bought for yourself?Food

48) Why do you think your followers follow you?I honestly have no idea

49) How many hours do you sleep at night?Lately, not very much.

50) What worries you most about the future?Not being happy

51) If you had a friend that spoke to you the same way you speak to yourself, how long would you be friends?Probably not very long

52) Are you happy with yourself?Not very

53) What do you wish you didn’t know?A lot of things

54) What big lesson could people learn from your life?Never hold things in for too long

55) If you could live in any home on a television series, what would it be?Never thought about it. Maybe Eric Forrester’s home even though no one knows who that is 😂

56) What’s your favorite Website?Instagram

57) What’s the habit you’re proudest of breaking?Staying up until like 3am every night

58) What was your most recent trip of more than 50 miles?To my grandma’s house for my cousin’s graduation party

59) What’s the best bargain you’ve ever found at a garage sale or thrift store?I’m not sure

60) What do you order when you eat Chinese food?Noodles

61) If you had to be named after one of the 50 states, which would it be?Dakota without the direction in front of it

62) If you had to teach a subject to a class, what would it be?Basic algebra or tennis

63) Favorite kind of chips?Sour cream and onion

64) Favorite kind of sandwich?Ham and Swiss

65) Which do you use more often, the dictionary or the thesaurus?Neither

66) Have you ever been stung by a bee?Nope

67) What’s your favorite form of exercise?Playing sports

68) Are you afraid of heights?Yes

69) What’s the most memorable class you’ve ever taken?Do sports count as a class? I made more memories with friends on the tennis courts than I ever do in regular classes.

70) What’s your favorite breakfast?McDonald’s egg, cheese and bacon mcmuffin mmm

71) Do you like guacamole?Love it

72) Have you ever been in a physical fight?Yeah

73) What/who are you thinking about right now?Her

74) Do you like cuddling?Yes

75) Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?Probably

76) Have you ever experienced one of your biggest fears?Yes

77) Favorite city you’ve been to?Los Angeles/Hollywood but NYC is also up there

78) Would you break the law to save a family member?Probably

79) Talk about an embarrassing moment? Most of my embarrassing moments aren’t even funny they’re just stupid so nah I’m good.

80) Are there any causes you strongly believe in?Yes

81) What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?Thankfully, I’ve never had anything too serious. I did get head butt someone before though. That wasn’t fun.

82) Favorite day of the week?Saturday

83) Do you consider yourself sexually open minded?Yes

84) How do you feel about porn?Love it

85) Which living celebrity would you like to know?Demi Lovato and Nick Jonas, maybe Niall Horan

86) Who was your hottest ex?@thishailee

87) Do you want/have kids?Yes

88) Has anyone ever told you that they wanted to marry you?I don’t think so

89) Do you get easily distracted?Depends

90) Ass or titties?Both but definitely titties

91) What is your favorite word?“Haha”

92) How do you feel about tattoos?They don’t bother me. I want to get one.

93) Do you have any pets?Yes

94) How tall are you?5'3"

95) How old are you?25

96) 3 physical features you get complimented on a lot?My eyes is pretty much it.

97) Is there anything you’re really passionate about?Yes

98) Do you have trust issues?Yes

99) Do you believe in love at first sight?Love at first words

100) What are some words that you live by? Why?“Never give up.” Cause I wouldn’t be here today if I had.