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#if I clean them up they'll be worse
sylvianasart · 1 year
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I have this character. And I've never actually drawn her myself. So I gotta learn how to draw better so I actually can sometime.
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caluski · 1 year
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It's always the "I don't feel loved! I can't be loved!" but it's never the "I've applied to more than one job today", is it
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prettycottagequeer · 6 months
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ok maybe I'm a little late to this BUT I'm gonna do a to-do list motivation thingy because I've had the worst two weeks since I started college :)
SO these I should start on asap:
50 I make the snack I really want but I haven't had the motivation to make
100 I clean my dorm. another thing I've been meaning to do for a week
150 I do the presentation about mid-victorian fashion I've been putting off (due Monday)
200 I start memorizing the monologue that was due a week ago (now due Tuesday)
these can wait longer:
300 I spend time outside. It's so nice but I'm getting stuck scrolling because I feel like shit. vicious cycle ect
500 I start setting a better weekend routine (aka getting up before noon)
1k I start working out again. I was doing a routine to get more masc and build muscle and I liked it but life hit me like Crowley driving the Bentley and I've missed like 3 weeks
2k I buy my first binder. I've been coping with sports bras for almost a year now and I haven't been able to justify spending $50+ on a binder even though I know I'd love it and use it everyday.
Do I tag people? I don't know but I'm going to. @the-globe-theatre-maggot @weirdly-specific-but-ok @howmanyholesinswisscheese
here's just some context if you want to read, feel free to skip. some of this I've talked about in the maggot server, some I haven't, but I really just need a place for this to go that's out of my head. tw homophobia, transphobia, car crash(??)
How I Have Been Run Over By The Bentley Going 90 In Central London What Feels Like 50 Times In The Last Two Weeks
I'm going to college about 4 hours away from my parents, and it's been really nice. They.. suck, to say the least. transphobic/homophobic ect, super traditional conservative catholic, racist, all of it. so i tried to move somewhere where I wouldn't have to think about them and I could be myself and do what I can to be happy. March 1st was the start of my spring break, which meant going home because the dorms close. I was already not excited, but I was prepared. the problem with being away from home is I forget just how bad they are. My optimism gets the better of me and I think maybe this time they'll be better. so I decided to not hide my septum piercing.
that was a mistake. it starts a whole fight where they say we know you're trans, you're actually a girl and you always will be, we have the bones argument, they think I'm being influenced by demons or something (if only they knew about crowley) because I want to change my name, and they tell me that going on t will completely ruin my body and give me cancer and other things. They're also mad about my dyed hair, septum, and general style, and say I'm setting a terrible example for my (5) younger siblings and make it a point to tell me just how much of a disappointment I am. I think I'm pretty cute and fun but y'know, whatever. very fun time. I lie so much, don't give them any more details about my identity, and say I'm not planning to go on t to save my ass. which is all on instinct which makes me feel worse because if I'm really trans I should be able to stand up for that, right? maybe I'm faking the dysphoria.
the next morning I wake up really sick, and spend the rest of the week sick and feeling like shit because I'm home and back in the same place and situation I was a year ago that I thought I escaped. at one point I pretty much lose my voice but also kind of get gender euphoria from it. it's weird.
On Friday it's time for me to drive back 4 hours to school, and I make it about 3/4 of the way when google maps takes me on a random gravel road and I crash my car, really crash my car, like sideways-in-a-ditch-windows-broken-crawling-up-out-the-door crash it in the middle of nowhere. (I was fully paying attention to the road, it was raining and super slick) I call my parents because I have no one else to call and I sit in a Subway for 3 hours while they drive to get my car. when they get there they're (understandably) really mad, and they tell me that I'm not mature enough to be going to school so far away and I need to get my shit together and stop depending on them. which. is probably true. but made me feel even more stupid about the fact that I crashed my car. I get back to school and I'm still Very Sick with no energy or motivation to do anything. So I've spent the last week trying to get better and honestly to do anything. it hasn't really worked. I'm a lot better health-wise (Not emotionally), still sick but I have a lot of work due, so I really need a push to get started
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ozzgin · 8 months
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Yandere! Yakuza x Reader (V)
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In a rather unlucky turn of events, you find yourself kidnapped for being in the wrong place during a gang war. Worry not, your yakuza boyfriend is at your service. Yet another bloody reason not to mess with him.
Content: female reader, organized crime, violence, gore, obsessive behavior
[Part 4] | [Yakuza Masterlist]
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"Damn it!"
The scarred man throws another tile into the pile, clicking his tongue.
"I gotta say, you're pretty good for a foreigner." A second man with an eyepatch remarks, carefully inspecting his set before retrieving a tile of his own. "Pung."
You take another greedy sip of the cheap sake and slam the little cup back on the table.
"Kind of inevitable to learn mahjong when your only friends in this country are yakuza." You look up towards your captor with a frown. "You guys ever heard of board games or something?"
"Try to explain new rules to this dumbass!" A third man angrily pours himself another glass, pointing towards the first. "Fuck, I could iron clothes on that smooth brain of yours!"
"Fuck off, you're not any better." The scarred man continues his turn with furrowed brows. 
"If I were you I'd keep quiet about being pals with the yakuza. They'll question you, too, after the office guy. Don't make it worse." The man wearing an eyepatch mentions in a lowered voice. The table suddenly goes quiet.
"When is he coming out?" You ask hesitantly, bile pooling in your mouth. You already suspect the answer.
"He's not. Bodies are discarded through the back entrance." He pats the ash off and takes another drag off his cigarette. 
You swallow. 
Being involved with the Triad was not part of your new year resolutions, yet here you are about to be interrogated by the local Chinese syndicate. At least the lackeys have taken pity on you, a poor civilian caught in the middle of their rivalry. Hence the fake sense of normalcy as you chitchat at the mahjong table with a cup of sake to ease your wrecked nerves. 
"I'm guessing they won't be as friendly back there." You nod towards the door, where they took your work superior several hours ago. 
"No." 
That's all you get and you can only smile bitterly. Huh. You wonder if this is how Daitou's victims feel, helplessly waiting for whatever is brought upon them. Having to watch him unwrap his tool belt, stuffed with rusty old tools littered in blotches of dried up blood. Pondering his questions while he eyes the row delectably, hovering his hand over the potential ways to loosen up the tongue.
Would they torture you, too? Hopefully not. It should be rather obvious you're just a mere civilian. Then again, if your work superior mentioned anything about you being Daitou's girlfriend...He's never told you anything downright incriminating, but it'll be hard to convince these fellows that you truly are clueless.
Maybe they'll let you go if you offer your finger as a token of peace. Your forehead wrinkles at the thought. Isn't it more of a Japanese custom anyways? And if they say yes, then what? Do they provide you with the required utensils or are you expected to improvise on the spot?
You remember one of Daitou's seniors describing the process in great detail during the Christmas party. You had asked him about it, purely out of curiosity, and he certainly delivered almost more than your stomach was able to handle (Daitou scolded him later for telling you too much). You take the tatami mat and preferably wrap it in cloth, to soak up the blood. Any sharp blade will do, but traditionally you'd be offered a proper tantō that can easily slice through the bone. Obviously you want to cut as little as possible, so you still have some functionality remaining. Right above the joint. You must put all of your body weight into the thrust, otherwise the cut won't be clean and it turns into a mess. 
Hell. You wipe the cold beads of sweat that have formed on your face. You can barely chop an onion. Maybe one of the gangsters has enough experience and goodwill to offer to do it for you. Then you only have to clench your teeth and prepare for the blow. It can't be that bad. Surely the shock will be too great, and your brain won't even register it. Before you know it, they'll dip your hand in ice and rush you to someone fit to perform the aftercare. Yeah. That should to the trick. 
"Hey, foreigner. It's your turn."
"Leave her be, can't you see she's pale?"
You glance up and notice the men looking at you expectantly. They've already showed you plenty of kindness from the moment they shoved you in that black van with the rest of the office workers. Perhaps you can rely on them one final time. You suddenly bow, head pressing against the table. They're somewhat startled by your gesture. 
"I'm deeply sorry to ask, but might any of you be knowledgeable in blades?"
"H-huh? What for?"
You ceremoniously slam your hand onto the table, rattling the mahjong tiles. You struggle to let the words out, but try to maintain a straight face, picturing Shozo Hirono's cool attitude when he performed the deed himself in Battles without Honor and Humanity. 
"Would your Boss be satisfied with a yubitsume? I cannot offer anything else of use."
You feel a harsh hand smack against the back of your neck and you cough, taken out of your focus.
"Dumbass! What the hell are you talking about? Why would our Boss need the finger of a civilian, and a woman on top of that? 笨人!" The man with an eyepatch is red and flustered as he scolds you. The other two are holding back their snickers, amused by the scene.
"Let her! I have a knife on me right now." The scarred man comments with a grin. "Whaddaya say, kid? Or have you changed your mind already?"
"A man never goes back on his word." You bark and straighten your back, crossing your arms imposingly. 
The eyepatch man smacks you again and the other two begin clapping, terribly entertained by your tomfoolery. 
The spectacle doesn't last long. Within seconds, you jump out of your seat at the sound of rapid gunshots and scattered, erratic shouts.
Daitou bows before his Seniors and mumbles a polite, monotonous greeting. It's highly unusual to have the Lieutenants gathered at the office like this. Kazuya is fidgeting in his seat, Boss is away on a trip. What else could require everyone's immediate attendance? He makes his way to the blonde man and drops himself on the sofa, awaiting the details. 
"Wakasugi has been taken."
A chaotic murmur ensues. 
"He's been making offers for a building in a neutral area. That's where the Chinese sell their drugs and they claim it to be their turf. I hear some of our newbies got caught dealing that shit as well. Boss has been on their throats for some time now and this is their way to say fuck you."
Ah. More gang rivalry drama. Daitou presses his lips together, trying his best to hold back a yawn threatening to escape his mouth. Hopefully they'll leave him out of it, he has a date planned with you and he'd rather not show up reeking of rotten flesh. 
If you get kidnapped, think of yourself as already dead. The Yakuza doesn't negotiate. They just get their revenge tenfold. Unless it's someone important, like the Boss himself, the honorable way is to die without betraying your Family. 
"Just put a few bullets in them. Should teach them a lesson." He says while stretching. 
"Yeah, we're sending Oota and his men to deal with it. Just be on the lookout." One of the Seniors responds. 
"Still, the fucking guts on them. To show up at the office, right before our eyes-" Another man cries out, frustration in his voice.
"What did you say?" 
Kazuya flinches. He knows where this is going and he glares at the outraged yakuza, trying to silence him. Sadly he doesn't take the hint.
"Right? They just waltzed in, shot some of our guys and took Wakasugi and whoever was nearby. Heh, what are they gonna do with a bunch of office assistants? Extra weight to carry to the dump."
"Enough!" Kazuya's exasperated yell causes everyone to quiet down.
There are several confused looks being exchanged before everyone's eyes eventually rest on Daitou, now staring ahead motionless. Didn't his girlfriend work at that office? The Senior giving out the initial order has realized the mistake. He quickly clears his throat and is about to speak, but Daitou abruptly stands up and heads for the door.
"Oi! I said we're leaving it to Oota. This isn't your job." 
He tries to repeat his words with confidence, but his voice falters towards the end when faced with Daitou's massive frame. Particularly the barrel that's now pressing into his forehead.
"Mind your fucking business or I'll kill you right here." Daitou threatens.
"D-don't think Boss will help you out of this one, brat. If you go, you're disobeying your Senior."
The tall yakuza smirks mockingly. 
"See if you can run for Boss with your skull split open, bitch."
Kazuya slaps the gun aside and steps between the men.
"Just let him go. I'll take responsibility." He pleads, his friend already slamming the door behind him. 
Once the aggressor has left, everyone exhales discreetly in relief.
"He'll get us in trouble with the cops." The Senior retorts to the blonde in a berating tone.
"What else do you suggest? You know there's no way around it if he's pissed."
No one replies to what seems to be an universally agreed upon truth.
He blows out the smoke and crushes the cigarette under his foot. Fuck. He needs to calm down. They most likely haven't killed you, but if they laid a single hand on you...He's blacking out again. Whatever blinding rage possessed him back in his youth, when his Boss got wounded, would now pale in comparison. His ears are ringing and his vision is foggy. He can't even recall how he made it to their building. Or how he got past the guards. Although that one's easy to figure out, judging from their twisted throats. 
He checks his rounds one final time and kicks the heavy metal door open. Only about a dozen of them, but no sign of you yet. Should take a minute. It is time for him to pay his respects. 
"What the fuck was that?" the scarred man swiftly takes out his weapon and knocks the stool over with his foot.
If it is who you think it is...Your face twists in fear.
"Listen, you've been nice to me so I don't want to see you dead. Could you...could you leave, please? It might be someone I know and I promise you there's no point in fighting back."
The noticeable quiver in your speech might lead one to believe you're awaiting your executioner, not your savior and boyfriend. But you've seen Daitou angry and the ordeal flooded the very marrow of your bones with terror. Naturally he could never be upset at his darling for any reason, ever. Whoever poses a threat to you, however, can't say the same thing. You remember trying to pull him back from a random drunk that had groped you during an outing, and he tightly gripped your jaw with a bloodied hand and nearly ordered you in a ragged growl: "Hey. I said I'll be done in a moment. Be a good girl and close your eyes." 
Thus, from experience, you know he'd never listen to your pleas. Maybe if he was lucid enough, but not in this manic state. The man wearing an eyepatch scans your expression attentively. Your worry is genuine and the other room is gradually becoming quieter, but not in a way that'd inspire him confidence. He certainly doesn't feel like dying today and there's nothing honorable about throwing yourself into a senseless battle. He nods at the other two men and he asks you one last time if you'll be fine by yourself, to which you shake your head vehemently. Please go away already. 
The final obstacle crumbles under Daitou's weight and you fiddle with your glass, alone, at the mahjong table. He seems to be taken aback, and once he confirms you're not in any pain or discomfort, his demeanor switches within an instant. 
"Where's everyone?"
"They ran away."
"Just like that? And left you here?" He stares at you, baffled.
"Maybe there's some still in the back. These ones left because I asked them to."
He approaches you, still bewildered and confused. He looks like a lost dog.
"What? They were nice to me and I didn't want you to kill them. You never listen when I tell you to stop." You huff, pouting and folding your arms.
"Sorry. I got a little bit anxious." He kneels before you and extends a hand apologetically. "Friends again?"
"Wash your hands at least, I don't want to know what organ remains you have stuck through your fingers."
He chuckles and wipes the palm against his shirt. You follow his movements and notice the bullet wounds near the ribcage. This madman. You speedily bend to his level and remove his jacket to inspect the injuries.
"Christ. Take off your shirt and let's at least stop the bleeding before we leave. How the hell can you still stand with all these holes in you?"
Daitou unbuttons his shirt obediently and you try to wrap it around his abdomen. You notice the thick, wide scar crossing his stomach, presently smeared with blood. Either his or someone else's. 
"Now that I think about it, how did you get this scar? From a gang fight as well?"
"Oh no, I got this in prison. I was supposed to serve many more years, but one of the Seniors rang and said Boss needs me for something. They were in talks with the police chief to maybe bribe my way out. 
But I felt terrible knowing that Boss would be wasting money on my mistakes. At the time the place was overcrowded, so I figured they'd let me out for medical emergencies. So I cut my stomach open and they counted it as a suicide attempt." He responds with a proud grin. 
You grimace a little at the mental image. 
The cloth has been tightly, albeit clumsily secured around his gashes and you both get up. It occurs to you that throughout this mess you haven't feared for your life once. It feels like Daitou is always there to get you out of trouble. Despite his unorthodox methods.
You gaze up at him and notice the prosthetic eye has rolled inwards, so you adjust it slightly with your finger. He follows your romantic gesture with a quick peck on the lips. 
"You'll get yourself killed one day." You whine, tired.
"And leave you alone? Never. You're stuck with me for life."
He flashes you a wide smile and pats your head.
"Can we still go on that date?" The yakuza suddenly remembers, guiding you as you zigzag your way among fresh corpses.
So he hasn't forgotten. A faint blush dusts your cheeks.
"Sure, but I'd like to have a bath first."
"Then let's have one together." He suggests cheerfully, completely unbothered by whatever just happened.  
Tags: @yandere-city2 @lokiofasgard12 @zeniiis @lucienbarkbark @channelinglament @your-next-daydream @bath1lda @murder-hobo @zanzie
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thedialup · 11 months
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grocery shopping (and shoplifting) tips from a cashier
DON'T BUY NON FOOD ITEMS AT THE GROCERY STORE. THEY JACK THOSE PRICES UP SO HIGH. laundry detergent, cleaning products, medicine, haircare shit- it's all better to get these somewhere else.
only buy the store brands UNLESS there's a sale on name brands that makes it cheaper than the store brand (but this is pretty rare). there's no difference.
most vendor coupons are shit, especially if they're trying to get you to buy more than one item. be really careful using these as a lot of the time they're not a good deal.
ignore the entirety of those drink coolers and snacks at checkout. most of them are overpriced and not worth it.
most store brand canned items and stuff like ramen noodles are super cheap.
FROZEN FOODS ARE SO OVERPRICED. BE VERY CAREFUL.
meat is expensive, and don't waste your money on any sort of organic blah blah whatever meat. it's the exact same shirt
same thing with organic produce, especially if it's something like bananas where you don't actually eat the outside. don't buy pre-packaged produce, it's not worth it for the exact same thing without a package.
check if produce prices are per pound or per item. they vary wildly so make sure to check so you don't get surprised at the register.
do you have self checkout? EVERY PIECE OF PRODUCE IS A BANANA :)))))
small stuff is was easier to steal than large stuff, obviously. don't try to fit a 50 pack of chex mix in your coat. it will not work.
most cashiers dgaf about shoplifting. managers do. stay away from them.
don't waste your money on overpriced expensive "organic natural blah blah blah" food unless you really have to bc of a dietary restriction. most processed food is more expensive and this just makes it even worse.
if the store has a membership card and you don't have one, always ask to use the store card. they'll let you, you just have to ask.
ground meat is cheaper and more versatile than whole cuts of meat. also make sure to look out for managers specials on perishable items like meat because they're trying to get rid of stuff so it'll be marked way down.
that's about all I can think of rn, add on if you have any extra tips
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ghysry · 1 month
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Hii! Idk if ur requests r open, I’m sorry if there not, but I had an idea :3
I’m kinda obsessed with Brisket Five…and all the diner fives. Srry if this makes u uncomfortable but maybe a smut with Brisket Five?? IF NOT just some nice fluff would be nice. Something like Brisket hasn’t seen us and we died in his time line or something-so he’s just all over reader <3 Ty!
ERMMM I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO WRITE SMUT I AM SO SORRY
Pairings: Diner Fives, all obsessed with you, kisses everywhere, BRISKET FIVE *lick emoji* x Reader
Tags: brisket five, diner fives, Five Hargreeves, Five x reader, Five Hargreeves x reader, smut, can't even say this is smut, I swear I tried my best bro, did I forget SMUT
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"Can't choose between us? Just choose all of us."
Well this certainly wasn't what you thought would happen after stepping into a random diner you found. You and Five had a fight about something stupid which led you to pettily step out of the subway and find yourself another place to go, which also proved your stupidity because only halfway off did you remember that it was a time subway and not a normal subway. Good god. Now you're here in the booth seat with your back on the cushion as you laid there and a Five that looks way cuter than the one you had a fight with kissing all over your face ranting about how much he's missed you.
"Mm..missed you, where have you," he kisses your right cheek, before trailing down to your jawline and pressing hefty kisses on your skin. "..been?" He had his legs on either side of you as you laid, making sure not to put too much weight on your body while one of his hands were messing with your hair and the other propping himself up. "Brisket Five are you done? Some of us want a turn, and I thought we agreed an hour per person?" Another Five in the background called out, folding his newspaper and rolling his eyes at the display of affection, knowing he himself would probably do something even worse, if not for all the people in the diner.
Brisket Five shrugged his shoulders, or tried his best to shrug his shoulders, before diving back in and pressing his nose on your neck, relishing in the familiar scent of your body. "Don't you ever die on me again.."
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Who knew so many of them would be into voyeurism?
"Fuck--huff...ugh," This Five was a lot more vocal than the others that came before him, and a lot needier too. His hands were touching all up on your body, squeezing your breasts and dipping down to bite at your skin while he was still pumping in and out of you.
Literally every Five needs you carnally, WHATTT WHO SAID THATTT
"Don't ruin them, it's my turn after you." While another Five is watching you go braindead over some cock, his hand on his crotch and pressing down on the bulge, hissing at how painfully hard he's gotten.
You cried so prettily while Brisket Five was deep inside you that he came twice in the span of thirty minutes. Literally can't help it, would cum ten times if he could, you're just so pretty.
You find it a weird turn on when some of them are so needy and untouched that they cum in minutes..which is almost all of them..WHOO WROTE THAT, THAT WASNT ME
Some of them huff and pant and whimper like dogs in heat. Confirmed.
"Missed you.." while Brisket Five is bottoming out inside you
Aftercare is literally HEAVENLY
Kisses all over your body, warm blanket for good measure, lots of "you did so well today", then being wiped clean by a wet towel
You're fed a whole lot of food after it's insane
Trust me. They'll do anything for you.
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shirefantasies · 3 months
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The Hobbit Characters + Pregnant Reader (Wife!Reader)
I just love fluff ok and, say it with me, I did this for LoTR 😁 (you can think of the older characters’ as being set when you guys are younger, not during book/film events 😊)
Warnings: conception mentions, some implications of infertility, pregnancy-related illness and symptoms, very long post 😂
Balin
✧ Five years. For five years you had tried. Six you and Balin had been married, happily as anything, but children never came. Your struggles had broken you down, leading you to try all the remedies well-meaning elders and healers alike recommended. Eat more good, strong foods, less of that greasy stuff. Drink this tea, it’s great for women! It’s only a bunch of tiny needles- the pain of birth will be worse anyway. Don’t be so active, let yourself relax for Mahal’s sake, girl! Remedy after remedy, you put your body through it all and put your hands up and prayed. Weeks passed and you had taken ill, attending the healers’ just to get something to ease your nausea, and that was when the questions began. Illness forgotten, you wandered in a grinning daze out of that hall and straight into your husband’s arms. When he chuckled and asked what this was all about, all you could do was snuggle into his chest deeper and whisper “It’s finally happened.”
✧ Such years leant of course to Balin being a bit extra protective of you. You often chastised him, good-naturedly of course, that he hovered so over you, and every time he would simply kiss you and say "That's right".
✧ It brought you both to tears when you began showing, when your condition had persisted long enough to be real, to last beyond the known months of danger. Forehead pressed against yours, your husband held you tightly and warmly for some amount of minutes you did not know, but minded not at all. Balin's words of love and reassurance were as music to your ears.
✧ Hormones confound you some days, pulling you from peace to ruin in mere moments, but Balin is always there with warm arms and wise words, reminding you that whatever you may think, you will never be alone.
✧ The one time during your entire pregnancy that you saw Balin cry was the day you brought home a tiny red coat that looked just like his and showed it to him with pride glowing in your eyes.
✧ He is so calm during all the worst sides of your condition, standing right by you through the good, the bad, and the ugly and dusting and cleaning you off each and every time. "We fought hard for this," he reminds you, "And I'll keep fighting with you every step of the way."
Dwalin
✧ You had wanted children all your life, certainly, and you'd seen Dwalin around them a few times, but what would he say? Your husband was a renowned warrior, hardened in the face of blood and steel and tolerant of no foolishness. But still he went soft as clay when his beloved wife fell into his arms. Thus that night you softened him up but good with all the great food and affection you could muster, so much that you had him remarking what a wonderful home he'd been blessed with. "And would you be willing to share it?" At that, your husband rose from his chair, hands tensing at his sides. "You don't mean-" "I do," you nodded. Without warning, you were swept up into Dwalin's arms, hoisted gently into the air with a giggle. "Just when I thought Mahal couldn't bless me any more! My beautiful wife, with child."
✧ Cue the two of you bickering back and forth like, well, a married couple, about who the child is going to look like. "I'll have 'em look just like you, thanks." "I for one relish in the thought of toting around a miniature Dwalin." "Come now," your husband teases back, running a hand over his shaven, tattooed head, "If they look like you they'll have better hair!"
✧ Dwalin has tiny wooden swords and axes made in time for your little arrivals, ensuring the axes match his to a tee.
✧ He sleeps flush against you now, head leaned against your growing belly and one hand firmly atop it like a lovely little line of defense.
✧ You have him absolutely wrapped around your finger, even more so now. Bat your eyelashes at him and make any request and he melts like butter. You’ll never want long for anything you crave!
✧ Admittedly he knows very little of a woman’s workings, but the moment he hears all your explanations he dubs you as great a warrior as he! “Beautiful as the stars and strong as the mountains to boot! That’s my girl.”
Thorin
✧ He has waited so long for this. So many years of this hanging pressure and yet when he has you by his side, all the feeling of necessity behind trying fades away. You two can simply enjoy life. So when you return to Thorin's side one day, eyes brimming with tears, all you say to him is "It's happened". And with that you see your king, your husband, collapse as if his whole body is sighing, pulling you into him like he needs you to breathe. One hand reaches up to hold the back of your head, gently caressing your hair.
✧ Vows every day that he will protect you both, be the father and husband you deserve, taking your hands in his and then leaning down to address both his queen and your child.
✧ Thorin also assures you that despite what any members of the court say, your new addition will be equally loved and equally worthy of the throne whether you welcome a son or a daughter. "All I wish is a healthy child with their mother's heart." "And their father's good looks," you tease in response, pulling your husband in for a kiss.
✧ You begin stealing his clothes, stating that his tunics are so much more comfortable than your dresses with an innocent bat of your eyelashes that has Thorin relenting every single time, heart rent at the way they begin fitting you tighter.
✧ You see a different side of Thorin in this stage of your marriage, one you’ll never complain about, not when he softens so, gazes down upon you with such love as he hovers over you, kissing your lips, your neck, your belly.
✧ There is no denying that you both glow during this time, pride and joy illuminating Thorin’s features right alongside the radiance of your childbearing state. Everyone stops you to say what a beautiful couple you are and you cannot help the flush of heat that rises to your face as Thorin thanks them and guides you away from the crowd, a protective hand on the small of your back
Oin
✧ Predicts it before you even realize because you’re exhibiting all the telltale symptoms; annoyed as you may be by his insistence that you are with child, what do you know? Oin is right. Oin is, unfortunately, also quite smug about this. Once the initial triumph wears off, though, he’s shouting for joy and crushing you with a hug!
✧ The absolute dream husband to have when you're with child, for he has worked taking care of countless dwarrowdams in your condition. He knows what you need. He understands. And most importantly, he does not judge.
✧ In fact, you two get a kick out of poking fun at the other husbands who roll their eyes at their wives' demands or take shots at their cravings because, frankly, that could never be you. "He doesn't know her body needs more iron!" "I bet he moans and groans about grabbing her a pillow, too."
✧ Having married such a well-known dwarrow, you’ll have all manner of strangers approaching you with congratulations that you reluctantly just accept, correctly assuming they’re patients of Oin’s that he’s proudly blabbed to.
✧ He’s always asking you to guess if you’re having a boy or a girl, insisting that “‘tis the mother’s intuition, after all.”
✧ You insist on remaining on your feet as long as possible, and your husband does not protest, knowing that exercise is good for the baby. That doesn’t mean he won’t be right behind you to catch you if you fall or check on your precious little bump, though, of course.
Gloin
✧ Not so subtle in his so-called 'baby fever', your husband has been going on and on about how his child will be his little flame, the apple of his eye, his world. You have no fear, then, sharing the news, in fact you amuse yourself by dropping your state in conversation like the plainest fact. "I'm glad you've got those new blankets, dear, what with the baby coming in winter and all," you told Gloin, taking a sip of your tea. Deafening is the only word you can use to describe the roar of celebration he gives, wonderfully bone-crushing and teeth-rattling your embrace and kiss.
✧ Tackles you to bed almost every night the first week, covering your cheeks and belly alike with kisses.
✧ Spends that very same time period sharing with absolutely any soul who even remotely listens that he’s going to be a father!
✧ Gloin is very insistent upon your care, even taking it upon himself to make your meals by hand. Which, suffice it to say, is a bit disastrous the first few times but he emerges triumphant in the end and succeeds in filling you with all the hearty things your budding dwarrowling needs!
✧ Being married to a dwarf means you have a husband who absolutely adores the extra pounds you put on and has no qualms about showing you in and out of the bedroom! Even just stopping by the market he’ll be wrapped around you.
✧ Encourages the baby every time they kick, shouting out praise of their strength while you tell him to cool it, all those kicks are going to you!
Bifur
✧ A large part of him thought that he would never be able to experience fatherhood. Not since the injury, and that had happened at such a young age. You cut right through that fear, assured Bifur that he would be an amazing father regardless of if he did some things differently. And that he would soon see, for your family would be growing early the next year.
✧ In all honesty, you feel blessed to have a husband who signs, for your baby will likely be able to communicate early! When you tell Bifur this he breaks out into tears, for what an angel you are to see the beauty in him. Every side of him. He promises to do the same.
✧ And make good on that does he! You will never want for love for even on your illest days Bifur is right by your side, his caresses gentle and speaking volumes of adoration.
✧ Absolutely adores jumping into the bath with you! His excuse being he has to help you and may as well rinse his beard off, but you can see how eager he is to run his hands over your hair and see the way your body relaxes at his cleansing touch. He wants nothing more than to feel useful, needed, and you assure him you cannot do this without him.
✧ Again and again, in fact, on the days when he stands behind you, holding up your burden and cheering you with little jokes and flirtation in Khuzdul even as you are overcome with exhaustion.
✧ Proudly tells everyone who will listen that he’s got a little warrior in there whenever the baby kicks!
Bofur
✧ You hadn’t exactly been trying. You hadn’t exactly been not trying, either. The news comes to you through a haze, muffled by the great rush of other thoughts bombarding your mind and sending your heart beating, but at their heart comes the image of Bofur holding a little one and bouncing them upon his knee and your chest flutters and soars. Your visit is completed all in smiles, and upon returning him to your husband’s questioning about the flu you’ve gone in for, you tell him it likely will not go away until the end of the year. “The end of the year? Why ever that long? I’ve never heard of a flu like that, not even-” “‘tisn’t a flu, my darling,” you smirk at him, “it’s a baby.” “A- you’re- we’re gonna have a-” Bofur is all agape, stepping closer and hovering his hands over your middle like he doesn’t want to grip you in a way that breaks you. “That all right?” You ask, half-teasing, for he has recently confided in you his envy of Bombur’s family. “All right? Song of my heart, I could kiss you!” “Well, what’s stopping you?”
✧ If you thought Bofur was affectionate before, well Mahal be with you, for you haven't seen anything yet! He falls even more in love with your body knowing it's carrying his and your child, hands nearly always holding or roaming you. When you're out and about, your husband usually has a hand at the small of your back, supporting the weight you carry as you walk and running soothingly up and down. Kisses all over your belly in private.
✧ This lends to how quick your husband is to reassure you on days you don't feel so friendly with your body, those times when you'd like nothing more than to shatter the looking-glass. "All I see," Bofur tells you one day, a hand on each of your shoulders as you peer together, "Is the most beautiful thing I've ever laid my lucky eyes upon, and she's not got an easy job. If I were her, I'd be proud of myself. Proud of making a comfortable home for our little one. And if I was her husband, why, I'd take her as she is right here and now! Right nice for me I am her husband, eh?"
✧ “Imagine havin’ a little girl.” Lying side by side, you heard Bofur’s wistful tone and felt a small smile creep onto your lips. “I’ll do her hair up in braids and tie them with ribbons. She’ll have all the pretty things she wants, because I have mine right here,” he adds, turning over to caress your belly and pull your lips into his.
✧ Marrying a toymaker comes with distinct perks: your husband crafts the most magnificent little wheeled contraptions and carven animals for your new addition! He spends hours carving and glazing them, and sometimes you catch him having fallen asleep at his workbench when you struggle to stay in dreamland, covering him up with a spare blanket.
✧ You worry because the baby doesn’t seem to move much, but Oin confirms everything seems to be going fine. “Your wee bairn just got this one’s personality, it seems!” He jokes, stabbing a mock-accusatory finger Bofur’s way.
Bombur
✧ A baker's dozen. For as long as you've known him, that's how many wee ones Bombur purported wanting. Thirteen more than most dwarves have, you always tease him, but in reality every time you see your sweet husband with children and hear him dream of a family your heart leaps. That is why the moment you take his hands and tell him it's come true is special, intimate, a quiet draw in and out of breath that has him sobbing joyously and nuzzling into your embrace with so much love your chest bursts from the flight of it.
✧ Sixth senses never seemed real to you until you became pregnant and it was like Bombur knew what you were craving and was making it before you could even say anything!
✧ Cannot keep away from you. Always wants to be kissing you and cupping your cheeks and holding your hands, just so so sweet!
✧ Bombur is so much more good-natured than you, for all the jokes about how you'll be as big as him soon have you swinging, but he just holds you back and laughs alongside them, saying he's looking forward to it with a twinkle in his eye.
✧ Literally baffled if you ever feel bad about your body; his legitimate confusion alone halfway snaps you out of the sad reverie, and all the following words about your beauty and your husband's appreciation of every inch does the rest.
✧ "You know I'll keep you safe, right? Both of you," he tells you one day, a hand resting upon your bump, "I may not be some great warrior, but Mahal help anyone who comes between us."
Dori
✧ From even before you were actually wed you knew that Dori would be an excellent father. Having taken care of his younger brothers from quite an early age, he had knowledge atop a naturally caring personality you fell for. Gentlemanly Dori waited with you, keeping chaste until after your wedding, but once it is official you know your news could come at any time and you accept that. On your one-year anniversary, in fact, your first gift to Dori is the tiniest bracelet of fine amber beads. “Does this mean…?” As soon as he sees you nod, Dori is taking you in his arms, cradling you gently as if you were made of fine porcelain and thrice as precious.
✧ Caring father-to-be. A little too caring. "If those are too heavy for you, I can carry them!" "They're just books, I'll be alright, Dori." "Oh, don't eat that, you got sick last time." "I haven't been sick in a month!" "That's a lot of steps, should I carry you?" "...Actually, sure."
✧ Always sleeps with his arm wrapped around your middle. No exceptions.
✧ Has every manner of tea and remedy you could desire on hand or otherwise purchases it. Same goes for supplies- Dori even found a ring-shaped cushion for you to lay on! He has your back for any ailment and is often there to make or apply your cure himself. After all, he wouldn't trust anyone else to do it!
✧ You love this dwarf with all your heart. He takes it upon himself to find dwarrowdams willing to let him practice changing diapers on their wee bairns and surprises you with this newfound skill when you return home one day!
✧ Dori’s love of the finer things absolutely carries over into his future fatherhood, as he has the loveliest little velvet clothes made and procures the dearest little bejeweled hairbrush. All in all, both of you amass far more than you need because any time you go out it inevitably devolves into you two clasping your joined hands between each other, gushing over all the wee things, and taking them home!
Nori
✧ He never thought he would get married at all, let alone have a family, but as time goes on the desire to continue his lineage and finally settle down takes hold. Then suddenly there he is desperately trying to seduce you into trying for a little one! It doesn't take long, not with his charm, until the day comes when you teasingly tell him that he got his way. Smirking until the realization takes hold of him, his arms are then snaking around your waist to pull you close.
✧ Always talking about how he's going to teach his little one everything he knows. When pressed about it, responds with such things as fighting and picking locks. His defense? "What if 'e gets stuck somewhere, or-"
✧ Impatient! "When am I gonna be able to feel 'em?" He asks, a hand upon your belly, which has yet to display any changes. "Not for another few months, Nori! I haven't even begun to show!"
✧ Hides things sometimes or puts them up places you can't go just so he can swoop in and help you, saving your day and pressing a kiss to your cheek as he tells you he can handle it, don't you worry your pretty little head.
✧ Nori always teases you when he pours himself a drink. "Bet you'd like some of this, huh? Not for three more months!" He chuckles. Your brows furrow. "Three months? What about when I'm feeding?" "What does tha- oh. Does that really-" "Yes, yes it does." "By the stars, I could have got my baby drunk!"
✧ Talks to the baby quite a bit, especially when he finally can feel the kicks. "Where you running off to, huh?" He chuckles, feeling the flutters against his hand pick up. "That's 'cause of me, isn't it? You hear me? That's right, it's your da. Can you believe it? Me, your da! I'll take good care of you, you hear?"
Ori
✧ "Ori, dear," you implored your husband, "Might you knit something for me?" Looking up from the scarf he'd just finished, Ori's eyes fell upon you and he gave that smile, the special one reserved just for you. "Of course. What would you like?" "A wee pair of booties," you replied, hands clasped and expression dreamy. "Who needs booties?" He asked, head cocked. "We will in the fall," you answered, stepping closer and resting a hand upon his. Ori's jaw dropped. "You... I... We-" Smile widening, you nodded. "I. You. We," you agreed.
✧ Nearly from the first day you know you are with child, Ori is rattling off names. After tossing out a great deal, he finally pauses and gives a sheepish apology. "I'm sorry, I suppose I've thought about this a lot," he confesses with a grin, "I just can't believe it's happening." Your hand joins with his, resting over your little bump. "Neither can I. It's like a dream."
✧ "So," you ask Ori one day, leaning your chin upon the couch where you'd lain, "What should our plan be for when my water breaks?" Your husband's brows furrow. "When your what?" "Oh, no," you mutter. Cue Ori spending his afternoon receiving a great multitude of lessons. What he got for being raised by other dwarf men, you suppose. "That really all happens to you?" He asks, gaping at you as though you came of the Valar themselves. "Yes, it does. Birth is a great deal of work. They don't just run on out, you know!" "Yes, I know. Of course I know." Ori's voice is faint; he excuses himself and you assume it's to faint or be sick, but about an hour later he returns bearing gifts. "I'm sorry I'm putting you through all that." "Sweetheart," you chuckle, cupping his cheek, "You know it takes two, right?" Your sweet husband reddened, but he nodded.
✧ Ori takes on almost all the cleaning himself- you haven't even asked! Finally curiosity gets the better of you and you inquire as to why he's gotten so into housekeeping. "Well, aren't you tired?" He asks simply, innocently, and you wonder how you got so lucky.
✧ He also knits far more than that pair of booties you requested- all three of you will have matching sweaters before your little one has arrived!
✧ Ori's favorite thing in the world is sitting with you in his lap, one hand cradling your growing bump and the other holding a book as you two take turns reading aloud, filling your cozy hollow with the sounds of voices your little one will come to love. The books are hand-drawn, written, and bound by him, of course!
Fili
✧ You two speak of little ones so much it borderline infuriates the others, Kili himself even bursting out in frustration one day at yet another interruption about tiny clothes, "Just get her pregnant already!" "Good idea. See you later," Fili replies, scooping you up and carrying you off bridal-style. "Wait, I- Damn, brother..." In reality, Fili just carried you around the corner and set you down while you two burst out laughing, but about a month later your tries were in fact successful!
✧ Honeyed words were no trouble for your husband before, but now? Praise falls endlessly from his lips. "Never did I think you could get more beautiful, and yet each day you succeed beyond my wildest dreams."
✧ Fili has a near-magical sense for your new struggles of coordination, all but flying to your side to catch your hand or waist whenever you trip or even whenever you must rise up again from your seat!
✧ He loves to tease you, asking what disgusting thing you'll think of him to fix next or joke that he can finally beat you in a fight in this state, but every joke is punctuated by the most loving eyes and gestures that they cannot do a thing but warm your heart and make you chuckle.
✧ Your baby is very active, kicking all the time! "We've definitely got a little Fili in here!" Your husband exclaims with a grin, hand resting atop your belly to feel your little one's exuberant motions. "A strong babe for sure," you sigh, "Much to the pity of my ribs!" "Too bad we aren't having a Kili. Nice and lazy for you." "Hey, I heard that!"
✧ He turns his head, peering over his shoulder at you as you waddle after him, golden hair cascading down. "Care for me to slow down a little?" "I care for you to shut up," you shoot back, crossing your arms and fighting your smile.
Kili
✧ The thought crossed your mind far before it did your husband's. Not that Kili had no desire for children, it was simply that the possibility was all the more yours to consider. It took a visit from your young cousin, who had Kili wrapped around your finger, for the fire to light in your husband's head as well, a smile lighting up his face. "We- we could..." "I know, Kili." You could and you certainly did but a few months later.
✧ "I hope they look just like you." "Me too." Kili pulls his head out of the crook of your neck. "Hey, that is the part where you say 'no, I hope they look like you'!" "I'm doing the work of carrying for how long again? Nine, ten months? Least they can do is resemble me a little," you shoot back with a smirk.
✧ It was Oin who brought the news: "Both babies seem healthy as far as I can tell!" "Both?" You gape. "Both babies?" "'s right," Oin replies, "I know I can't always hear the best, but I haven't been wrong on a heartbeat yet. You can feel 'em." "Guess we did pretty good, eh love?" Kili teases, earning him an elbow to the ribs, but he just shakes his head and tugs you closer against his chest. "Should we make their names confusing as well?" "Don't you think it might get old for them?" "Fili and I switched names plenty of times and we aren't even identical!" You should have known.
✧ Kili takes to sleeping facing you, close enough that sometimes your cheeks brush. Others he slips down lower and you awake with your husband cuddled up to the bump of your belly.
✧ Will come running from any room, anywhere, to feel the babies kick, and also loves tugging along any of his family he can take, too. Childlike wonder fills your husband's eyes every time and pride glistens in his dark eyes when he's brought along his mother, his brother, even his uncle the king!
✧ Never once do you doubt yourself or have one moment of room for insecurity, for Kili still flirts with you as if you were tweens and sneaks all sorts of touches, pecks, and affectionate hands in your hair wherever he can find it! The notion of a baby destroying the romance of your relationship is laughable to you, who married a dwarf that has no shame telling you you're the most gorgeous creature to walk the earth and warm his-and the baby's in a different way-body.
Bilbo
✧ Bilbo's a perceptive hobbit. He knows something's off with you. You don't usually scurry around the way you are like everything has to be perfect. That's his job. "Something the matter? Are you... expecting someone?" Your husband follows you down Bag End's hall as he gives his inquiry, eyebrows shooting up at the look on your face when you turn around. Consternation, resignation, finally a smile. "I was going to tell you after dinner," you answered, "But since you asked it like that, yes I am expecting someone. Our child this spring." At that, it was Bilbo's turn to shift through expressions. Shock, realization, finally a smile.
✧ Nursery shopping has become Bilbo's favorite pastime. Baby Baggins isn't arriving for months and yet your husband is returning from market with all manner of trinkets for the shelves and paper for the walls. You cannot help giggling at his armfuls of supplies and kissing his cheek as you relieve as much of his burden as he allows you to.
✧ So sweet, always helping you dress, pulling on every garment with the utmost of care and even avoiding your reflection on days you feel bad. Quickly kissing each part of your body before he covers it with something he knows will be comfortable.
✧ You'll be eating well whether you like it or not! Bilbo will make you anything under the sun if it means you and Baby Baggins are getting nourishment and he certainly will not have you skimping! Anything that makes you sick simply is not allowed in Bag End at all, end of discussion.
✧ One night, you awake to soft whispers and your heart melts at the sight of Bilbo resting his chin on your growing bump talking to the baby. Not uttering a word, you simply watch, taking in the moment beneath the sheen of tears in your eyes.
✧ "Careful, careful," Bilbo is always telling you, holding your hand and guiding you over the smallest of obstacles, even little puddles and rocks.
Thranduil
✧ He has talked about getting you pregnant before, but speaking of it and doing it are two entirely different things, especially with...well, words of such nature. Thus, you find yourself nervously wringing your hands before your husband as he strokes your face, asking whatever is the matter. At Thranduil's touch, his intense gaze, you fin yourself melting and admitting all, confessing that you are expecting his child. You are certainly not expecting the way his confident smile utterly falters, dissipating in favor of the look of a man near tears. "Truly? A little one of our own?" "Yes," you whisper, finally able to smile as the tension melts from your body, which is soon pulled against the Woodland King's. "Long have I dreamed of this day, my love."
✧ One of his favorite new activities is commissioning you new maternity dresses; you will certainly have plenty to wear if Thranduil has any say about it! In addition, when the time comes of course he requests that you model them for him.
✧ Thranduil loves to sneak up behind you, lightly wrapping his hands about your waist and laying them atop yours, his head resting in the crook of your neck and breathy, pleased laughter warming the skin there.
✧ When you start showing, oh, he loves it. One more sign that you are his, utterly and truly his queen, his beloved, claimed by Thranduil in every sense. He follows your lead, a hand around your waist, letting you shine like the gem he knows you to be. Rarely will you two be seen apart, not when the king can bask in your glow, relish the eyes upon your beautiful form, heavy with his child.
✧ There is one day he catches you in tears and heart tearing he steps to scoop you up against him, cheeks held gently in his elegant hands, which begin to glitter with your tears. "My rings no longer fit," you sob, head falling to his chest. Thranduil holds you close, grip loose as though you might break. "That is not your fault, meleth nîn." "I feel so... so massive." "Who wishes a small dwelling, hm? Piteous thing not to have any comforts. Your body is a host of life, the vessel of a bloodline. Beautiful in all its forms. Never forget that, oh dearest one."
✧ Thranduil is experienced; he knows many little tricks to help you feel better, be they massages or ways to bear your weight. He impresses you with the knowledge he has of the ways of women, understanding your water breaking, dilation, and every complication the healers warn you about and telling you before they even do!
Feren
✧ First to know was neither you nor your husband, but rather your cat, for she had suddenly become your little shadow, following you about your home and taking rest upon your lap as often as she could. "I wonder what it is that got into her," you commented one afternoon, smiling and stroking her back. "Growing up, ours got like this when my mother was carrying my younger sisters. Both times. It was like he could sense it," Feren replied. You both sat in smiling silence for a moment longer before simultaneously straightening, looking each other right in the widening eyes.
✧ Gets a little flustered, frankly. Not so much at your news itself, simply the realization sinking in that he is to be a father. He, Feren, will have a child. He says this out loud several times before suddenly breaking out into a smile. You tease him for going through half his emotions at once, but now the wave of joy has swept him up!
✧ Playfully rolls his eyes and mock-complains every time you remind him that he has to clean up after the cat now! Subsequently adds that he would fetch you the moon if you asked it.
✧ Loves helping you bathe the more difficult your condition makes it, scrubbing your hair with such care and gently massaging your sore feet and ankles as you wash up. Despite your husband's skill in battle, Feren's hands are the most loving and delicate you could ask for.
✧ Your husband has a natural tendency to rise early, so now that your sleep has become more fitful you do find that you have more time to spend together. Your head falling to his shoulder as you whisper to each other, seated as you are upon your bed with blankets draped over your shoulders.
✧ Feren wins your heart time and time again, like the day he lowered you down gently onto the grass of a sunny meadow, basking with you and weaving flowers. He made you a ring, crowned you with a wreath of flowers atop your head, and made another little one to place gently on the curve of your belly, bringing your heart to soar.
Bard
✧ Uncertainty wracks your heart and wrings your hands at the would-be-cheerful news. In fact, you yourself do feel joy, have since your suspicions were confirmed, but would Bard see it the same way? He already has three mouths to feed, three children all old enough to take care of themselves. Will he wish to start it all over so? "What's wrong, love? Your lip is bleeding." So it is. You've practically gnawed the poor thing off in all your stewing. A sigh escapes you. Bard is your husband. No sense in delaying a very necessary conversation. "I know we should have spoken more about it..." You begin, trailing off. At once, Bard senses your reservation and rises to your side, taking hold of your arms; the love in his dark eyes brings a small smile to your lips and relaxes you slightly. "I'm with child, Bard." Almost childlike is the wonder and joy spreading across your face, and before you can say another word you are being pulled into Bard's chest, face snuggling into the fur of his coat.
✧ He knows what to expect, naturally, so Bard is definitely not the type of husband to gripe about your requests, though he does smirk and poke fun if you’re especially outrageous with it or have a funny enough delivery. Then kisses you if you pout about it before fetching what you seek.
✧ Caution overtakes you and your husband as you make to tell his older children the news, particularly you, but your wringing hands relax when you can see the joy in their eyes, particularly the girls! They hope the baby is another girl, hugging you so tight you almost cannot breathe, but you complain not.
✧ Happy is Bard to take on assistance cooking; he knows it can make you sick sometimes and besides, it's a nice excuse to make sure you get all the nutrients you need! You are certainly very lucky in the skill and domesticity of your spouse.
✧ Stands behind you and reaches his arms around you, lifting up the weight you carry and smiling, kissing your neck and cheeks as you relax from your burden.
✧ He also has no qualms about making you rest, down even to physically lifting you up and carrying you to bed if he must!
Beorn
✧ Hesitant as he always would have claimed to be about bringing more Skin-Changers into a world so cruel to them, Beorn feels his nesting instincts kick in very quickly after you become his wife. You see it in the things he gathers, the way your husband moves things such as your blades to higher, safer locations. He is anticipating something. Something you cannot help pulling him aside and asking about, and when your feelings on the subject are made known, well, it is entirely possible you conceived that very night.
✧ Beorn has an almost eerie sense for all the changes taking place in your body. You feel a sharp pain in your back, and without a word your husband is behind you, ushering you down for a massage with some of the oils he's pressed.
✧ The aforementioned nesting instincts manifest early on, your husband carefully blunting corners and tucking away the best blankets so the little one-or ones!- will be nothing but safe and comfortable.
✧ Withdrawn as he could be, Beorn's affection is drawn out by your condition, his big brown eyes soft upon you as he pulls you into his lap, large hands secure about your waist and sliding gently up and down your growing belly.
✧ And grow it does! It seems to get heavier by the day, but that is explained thanks to your husband's exceptional hearing. "Four heartbeats. One is yours. A litter- three are coming!" Spots dance in your vision at that news, but Beorn's smile as he grips your hand brings you back to the light. You could do it with him by your side. "Our little litter."
✧ He attempts to reassure you anytime your anxiety grows. "My dearest flower, I have delivered hundreds of calves and piglets in my day! You will see this through." Reassuring? Perhaps not so much. But in your heightened emotion, that does break you into a wild laughter that does indeed relax you nonetheless.
Want to meet the little ones? Perhaps there will be a Part 2 😉
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inbabylontheywept · 1 month
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how did you get married? how did you recover from the minion halloween and be able to look another human in the eyes? i could never i would wilt like a deflated wacky wavy balloon guy dipped in soy sauce then left in the nevadan summer
i think you're underestimating how tough you are. you probably haven't had a day quite as shit as the minion incident yet, and that's great, but the unfortunate thing i'm gonna tell you is that one day you will have a day that's worse. so much worse. one day, you will wake up, and you'll be going about your business, and you get a call only to learn that someone died.
the first time you get that call, it'll probably be a grandparent. and you'll get one or two, three tops more of those, and you'll think you're getting the hang of things, and then it will be your parents. then after that, and i am so sorry to hit you with this, it will be your siblings, or your spouse, or your friends. each round will feel like it killed you, and it won't be until the next that you realized the one before was a warning shot.
any one of those by itself is going to make the minion incident feel like the highschool shit that it was, and each time that happens, you're going to keep on living. you'll have a few weeks to grieve, but when it's done, you'll still have to go to work, and cook your own meals, and clean your own house. you'll still be alive. and maybe that's all you'll be for a while - alive - but you'll find ways to become more than that. you'll be up to your eyes with grief, and your coworker will stop you one day and just give you a hug, and you'll take it, because for once in your life you won’t be too proud to let someone care. or you'll be in your apartment, going to grab your mail, and your neighbor will be out there, and they'll wave to you a little, and maybe you never talked to them before, but you’ll have your chance to talk to them then. and you'll take it, because fuck, nothing makes you realize how much you have left to lose quite like loss.
i got married because the minion incident didn't destroy me. people don't get destroyed that often. if almost every makes it through burying their parents, then almost everyone could also survive showing up to a bootycall in yellow bodypaint and overalls. and yes, it was embarrassing, but the sun rose the next day, and i got up, and i brushed my teeth, and i went to school, and i cried a little at lunch when i told my academic decathlon friends about it, and they told me it wasn't my fault, and i told them that i knew that, it just sucked anyway. and they got it. and then the day after that was easier. and the day after that, easier still. and occasionally bad things happened, but even afterwards, life carried on. eventually, i graduated highschool. i went to college. i kept meeting interesting and kind people. i met my wife, and she was both, and i couldn't help but fall in love with her.
i got a little head start on seeing the way life goes on after a disaster, but not by much. i'm going to live through worse. you're going to live through worse. and every time the world ends, we're gonna wake up the day after, wash off the emotional vomit, and keep moving forward.
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woso-dreamzzz · 7 months
Text
Surgery III
Mapi Leon x Ingrid Engen x Child!Reader
Summary: Mami wants another one
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Because of your superpower, Mami says that you make a lot of assumptions. She says it's because your brain makes lots of different connections that other people wouldn't. Sometimes you just assume things because of it.
You don't know what that means but you just nod and smile because Ingrid says that's what you need to do to get Mami to stop talking sometimes.
You're completely enamoured with the washing machine spinning when Ingrid swears. Or, you think she swears. Sometimes she says stuff in Norwegian that she tells you not to repeat because it's naughty so you assume those are swear words.
She doesn't swear a lot but you know to ignore it anyway, focussing on the way the washing machine spins. You'd tried to get in it once with Bagheera so you could both spin but Mami got angry at you and talked for ages for you smiled and nodded as your mind wandered to whether or not you could fit in Bagheera's cat tree.
"Cub," Ingrid groans and your name makes you turn.
She's holding one of your toy trucks. It's big and yellow and it's like the ones that the people building the apartments down the street use to move all their big rocks.
You smile toothily at Ingrid and reach your hand out for your toy.
"I asked you to clean up your mess a while ago, cub," She says, not giving your toy to you.
You frown. Ingrid did tell you to do that but you'd gotten distracted by Bagheera and then the rumble of the washing machine. You like the washing machine so you sat in front of it.
"My toy," You say.
"We need to clean up," Ingrid says," It's very messy."
You don't see the problem. Your things are strewn all over the room but you know where everything is so it shouldn't be a problem. But Ingrid likes things neat and tidy.
You think that's why Mami is dating her because Mami is messy and she needs someone to organise her things like how Ingrid helps you organise your thoughts.
You like Ingrid though and want to keep her happy because she's the boss in the house.
You get a bit distracted as you go to pick up your digger, making little engine noises with your mouth. You're not really sure how engine noises sound so you just mimic the sound of the washing machine instead.
You ram it into the wall a few times as Mami comes into the room.
She's holding Bagheera.
"Oh, please, Ingrid," Mami says," It won't be much trouble. Please, let's get another one."
You wonder what Mami is talking about. You put your truck away and reach for your lion cub, making it purr like the washing machine as you get out your magic wiggles.
You mull over Mami's words. You don't go to nursery a lot (Ingrid says that they don't accommodate your add with an h somewhere well so you only go when you absolutely have to) but the last time you went, there was a little boy who said that his mum begged his papa for another baby and she got one.
If that's what Mami is talking about, you don't like it. You don't want a new baby because if Mami gets a new baby then maybe you won't be lion cub anymore because the baby will be younger than you so they'll get your nickname.
You don't want a new nickname because you're Mami and Ingrid's cub.
Your thoughts make your magic wiggles a bit worse than better, especially when Mami mentions your name.
"It'd be good for y/n," She says," You've always said it was good for you when you were younger."
Ingrid makes a face. "That's different and you know it. We had a bigger house when I was younger. There's not enough space here."
You're glad Ingrid is speaking up because adults don't always listen to little kids. You know this because sometimes the adults at nursery don't like you running around when you have the magic wiggles even though Ingrid tells you it's the best way to get them out.
You hope Mami listens to Ingrid because you definitely don't want the new baby that Mami must want.
"Please, Ingrid," Mami says," We can make room! y/n would love it! It could share her bed."
You freeze instantly. Your brain screeches to a halt as you work out what Mami's just said.
You're up on your feet, throwing your lion cub to the ground and screeching. It's very high pitched and it makes your ears ring a little bit. You stamp your foot.
"No!" You say," Not in my bed!"
You don't want to share your bed anymore than you want to share your Mami and your Ingrid.
"No! No! No!" You cry.
You couldn't get your magic wiggles out earlier but they're all coming out now as you scream and cry as much as your little body will allow.
"Why?" Mami asks," You let Bagheera sleep in bed with you."
"My Bagheera!" You say through your tears.
Mami tries to go to soothe you but you shriek again and hide behind Ingrid because she doesn't want this new baby either and she won't betray you like Mami is.
"Si," Mami says," Your Bagheera. But you love Bagheera a lot."
You nod.
"Don't you want to have another friend to play with?"
You shake your head. "No! No new baby! Just me!"
Mami looks at you strangely. "I know," She says," You're the only baby we'll have. We know that."
It's your turn to look strange at Mami now and you peek out from behind Ingrid's leg to look at her. You sniffle. "Why're you askin' for another one if you know it's just me?"
Mami laughs slightly, a smiling tugging at her lips. "I'm sorry, cub. I should have been more clear."
"Mapi," Ingrid says warningly," No."
"Oh come on, it'll be good for her. It'll teach her responsibility."
You frown. "What will?"
"I've been thinking." Mami eases down to your height. "You're a big girl now and you love Bagheera a lot but she's technically Mami's, right?"
You nod.
"Well, how about we get you a kitten for yourself? Wouldn't that be fun?"
"Mapi!"
You nod quickly and Mami smiles.
"Well," She says," You just have to convince Ingrid. Because she's the boss, remember?"
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swarvey · 2 months
Note
Can you do bachelor hcs where farmer is like super hurt? Like blood gushing from their abdomen or smth?? Like basically life threatening
when they think you're not going to make it | sdv bachelors x gn!reader
summary -> how some of the boys react to seeing you come out of the mines unconscious with nearly fatal wounds. warnings -> blood and injuries, panic attacks, harsh language
a/n: basically a more severe version of this series lol, i hope you enjoy!!! <3 alex's is probs the longest bc i was inspired heh, i started with alex and shane, but lmk if y'all want more!
alex
feels like his throat is closing in on itself when he sees you all beaten up in harvey's clinic
harvey has to yell at linus to get him out of the room when he keeps trying to reach you
completely panics at the thought of losing you
he just doesn't want to be alone again
it was no secret alex hated hospitals, and harvey's small clinic was no exception. he always tried to leave his appointments with the doctor as soon as he could, and although he would accompany you to yours, he preferred to stand outside until you finished. everything about the environment was too much for him, too painful.
so when linus — the local homeless guy he never really cared to talk to — caught him on the street and practically begged him to go to the clinic, he wasn't entirely convinced. only when your name slipped off his tongue did his eyes widen, his feet moving before his mind could catch up.
alex hated hospitals, and now he had a reason to hate them even more.
"y/n?"
his voice was barely audible as the world around him began to fade, only focusing on your paled face and the blood-soaked bandage wrapped around your torso. his breath got stuck in his chest, and an all too familiar feeling began to swarm him —images of his poor mother laying in a cold hospital bed, monitors beeping rapidly as the doctors failed to save her.
not again. please, not again.
"get him out of here!" harvey demanded, pushing him away from your body. alex blinked, realizing he'd moved past the doctor and was desperately trying to hold onto you. "alex, you have to step away, or else i won't be able to help them."
"stop it, they need me! let me go," he loudly protested. he knew it was childish; he knew he sounded like the same kid he was all those years ago, begging to see his mom one last time, but he didn't care. this was you, and he couldn't lose you. he couldn't lose anyone else.
despite his efforts, alex was swiftly dragged away by linus's unexpected strength. before he knew it, he was standing outside the clinic in the cool evening air, chest heaving as he tried to breathe.
"take some deep breaths," the older man said, somehow sounding level-headed. "it'll be okay."
"the fuck do you know?" alex snapped, voice wavering. "you don't know anything about what it's like, do you? what it's like to lose someone? to watch someone die?" his voice hitched, tears beginning to well in his eyes before spilling down his cheeks. "i can't do this. i-i can't do this again, not again, not after last time — i can't—"
"hey." strong hands planted themselves on his shoulders, and his panicked gaze met linus's kind eyes. "this isn't the first time i've dragged people out of the mines, alright? trust me, i've seen worse. they'll be okay."
"you don't know that," alex replied weakly. "they might not make it."
"they're strong, you know that."
"she was strong, too. my mom was the strongest person on this planet." more tears blurred his vision. "look where she ended up."
linus sighed, dropping his arms. "she was," he agreed, and alex looked up in surprise, "but this is different, alex."
"how do you—"
"alex." he turned, meeting harvey's exhausted smile. "you can come in now." alex nodded, wiping his face with his sleeve and giving linus a a grateful look before walking in.
your face was still pale and you weren't awake, but it was clear you were much better than before. a new, clean bandage covered your abdomen, and an iv was attached to your arm.
alex let out a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding. "so, they'll be okay?" he asked, sitting on the chair beside you.
"yes, with some recovery, of course," harvey said, sounding just as relieved as alex felt. "though, i would strongly advise not letting them go to the mines for a while. an injury like this won't heal quicky, and it will likely scar. please talk to them after they wake."
"got it, doc. seriously, thank you so much." with another smile and a nod, harvey walked to another part of the clinic, leaving alex alone with you. he kept repeating the doctor's words in his head as he grabbed your limp hand, watching your chest fall up and down with each breath. "you'll be okay," he whispered, though it wasn't you he was trying to convince.
as alex drifted off to sleep next to you, he silently reminded himself to stop by linus's tent the following morning.
shane
he usually acts pissed at you whenever you get hurt, but it's only bc he knows you can handle yourself
usually you can, anyway, which is why he's worried when you don't come home when you said you would
he's quick to leave the house and immediately starts looking for you (tries to convince himself you're just running late)
in complete shock when he sees you in dr. harvey's arms as he rushes into the clinic with maru beside him
shane glanced at the clock for the fifth time in the last minute, frown deepening when you still didn't appear in the doorway. he could practically hear you chastising him for being too dramatic, but he didn't care — you'd never been this late before, and a tugging feeling in his gut told him there was something wrong.
swearing under his breath, he threw on his jacket and left the farm, telling himself that you probably just got caught up at the saloon, or maybe you stopped by the community center. then again, you had mentioned you wanted to get back into fishing—
"maru, get the door!"
a cold wave washed over shane's entire body, making him halt mid-step.
all he could focus on was your bloodied face hanging from harvey's arms as he rushed you into the clinic, maru hot on his tail.
for a second, time seemed to stop.
then, he was sprinting to catch the door and run in after them, panicked words spewing from his mouth before he could even process his thoughts.
"what the— what the fuck happened? where did you even—? are they going to be okay, oh shit, are they gonna wake up—"
"shane," harvey gritted out through his teeth, "you need to leave, now."
immediately, shane stood his ground, jaw clenched. "i'm not fuckin' going anywhere, not 'til they're awake."
"shane," the doctor repeated in a softer tone, eyes pleading with him, "i can't work on them with you in the room. this wound is deep — i need to operate, and you can't be here."
"please," maru added quietly, looking more distressed than shane had ever seen the typically laidback girl. "th-they might not make it."
harvey gave her a look, but didn't deny her words. shane felt his stomach drop.
then, wordlessly, he turned and slammed open the door into the waiting room, forcing himself into a seat as he bit back panicked tears. maru's words kept playing back in his head like a broken record, and suddenly, shane realized he might have to face a terrifying world without you in it.
"fuck," he cursed, letting his head fall into his hands to hide the hot tears streaming down his face. at first, he thought he was angry — he always told you to be careful, that you shouldn't be running around so damn carelessly all the time, you're not fuckin' invincible. you never listened, of course, always spewing something stupid about doing what's best for everyone. after hearing that phrase more than a handful of times, shane thought it was pretty reasonable for him to be a little pissed.
in that moment, though, who the hell was he kidding? he was nowhere near pissed; he was scared.
you couldn't die, not yet — not when he just got better, not when he still had so much left to say to you. the thought of never being able to see your smile again made him nauseous, and he wished he could rewind back to the morning so he could tug you back into bed with him. stay, he would say. you're not leaving my side today, alright?
he knew it wouldn't have worked. he would still try, though.
shane didn't realize how long he stayed in the same position until the waiting room doors creaked open, his head shooting up at the sound. harvey greeted him with a nod, which he returned stiffly as he stood up.
"d-did everything go okay?" he asked, swallowing in an attempt to soothe his rough voice. "are they—?"
"they're fine," harvey replied, a small smile upturning his lips at the sound of shane's relieved swears.
"thank fuck, i don't know what i would've— it doesn't matter, can i come in?" he barely waited for a response before slipping past the doctor and finding your bed.
he caught maru on her way out, giving her another nod. she smiled, wider than harvey's, before making her way to the other room.
shane hesitantly grabbed your hand as he sat down in the chair beside you, scared he might break you if he held you too roughly. when you didn't stir, he laced his fingers with yours and held them to his forehead, pressing a firm kiss to the back of your hand.
"you scared the shit out of me," he sighed, shaking his head. "god, i don't know what i would've done if you— if i couldn't—" he couldn't bring himself to finish his sentence, resorting to giving your hand another kiss. "you better wake up, you hear me? i'll fuckin' kill you if you don't." he half expected you to answer. he could hear your voice in his head telling him to stop acting so tough, that you could see right through him.
instead, the sound of your steady breaths filled the room, and even then, shane felt like that was your way of telling him everything would be okay.
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singingcicadas · 6 months
Text
Megatron's Opposite Day
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"I free slaves"
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This is Soundwave binding Ratbat but seeing as Megatron did the same thing to Pentius by putting his spark into Trypticon and reformatted Rumble and Frenzy into cassettes against their will I think he approves a lot of this practice
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Megatron on Optimus and humans, after his defeat in All Hail Megatron ⬇️
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he really salty
"I implant ideology" aka brainwashing
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Decepticon cause = Megatron. nuff said.
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"I liberate cities" says the person who let Nyon burn to make a point
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Cities are too small, think bigger
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Holding New York hostage.
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"Like Autobots, they believe in the sanctity of life" which he doesn't. Kudos for being honest.
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Allowing troops to do free-rein massacre is a reward for conquest. Nothing like some easy murder for de-stressing.
The Simanzi massacre which halved the Cybertronian population is off-screen so it doesn't deserve its own pic
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"The revolution"
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"We only feel good when we stand with a blade in one hand and a throat in another" "Let's make the entire face of the planet into our new gladiator arena"
What nice, confidence-inspiring revolutionaries. I'm sure they'll rule the population with benevolence after they've killed all the Necessary People with Necessary Violence. Final interpretation of what constitutes as Necessary is reserved for the sole discretion of Megatron, ofc.
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Good goals.
Sentinel might be an absolute asshole but at least he's got one thing right: they're literally a gang of thugs who gets high off murder.
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"The people are my utmost concern"
'The people': ................
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"Battling for freedom"
Freedom of what? Function? Autonomy?
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Religion?
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the ability to choose whether to fight? on which side to fight?
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Idk why they used the word "pogrom" for this, it's way too specific
Anyways it doesn't matter, they won't be missed.
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Good for Bumblebee for calling him out. Screenshotted this just to appreciate Megatron's bitchy face ⬇️
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Other urban legends:
"Megatron loves Cybertron" let's just burrrrn it
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He did fight to save Cybertron in Chaos Theory but also made it pretty clear why he did it. It's not out of the goodness of his heart or any sentimental reasons like that. It's an ego/dominance thing.
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Plus his wording when he's trying to convince Optimus to let him go with the Lost Light: "I broke the planet. And that, Optimus, is why I owe it to you - to everyone - to find a replacement."
Replacement.
In other words: I made a mess and can't be bothered to clean it up, so I want to get away from it and find somewhere new to start clean.
I don't think Optimus appreciates the favour.
"Megatron tore down a corrupt government" which is true, just too bad that he's worse
He's also, um, a closeted Zeta admirer?
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"Megatron advocates equality" ???
Megatron x dictatorship is literally his OTP. They were inseparable for four million years. A lot of people died trying.
"Megatron cares about the Decepticons" no he doesn't. Not his troops nor its cause.
Like for one thing he treats them with complete scorn
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Admits that the most useful thing about keeping Starscream around is that he can bully underlings into line
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Wants to use the humans' nuke to get rid of his troops and reformat them into peaceful drones after they outlive their use because they were "too ruthless" for his perfect peaceful society
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Has zero scruples about fighting Deceptigod, just affronted that his own soldiers are being used against him
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And basically just drops the Decepticons like a bag of vermin after he surrenders. He never once mentions them of his own accord, other than to insist he has nothing to do with them. Even his surrender speech is something Optimus makes him do as exchange b/c he wants to go on parole. He wasn't planning on making a public address otherwise, he was just going to leave them hanging.
Looking at the publication timeline, Megatron started out as an established Evil McEvilson-type villain similar to how he is in G1 and it's not until Chaos Theory in 2011 that JRo really gave him a sympathetic backstory that drew his characterization away from the bloodthirsty pugno ergo sum warlord into someone who once held ideals about societal reform and remains convinced of his own moral supremacy throughout the 4 mill years of death and war, adding worldbuilding such as Functionism/oppression/government corruption as justification for the beginning of the Decepticon movement. But because the start of the Decepticons was already written in Megatron Origins and every evil thing he'd done up till Chaos Theory can't be retracted and they had to keep Megatron as a villain until his story was no longer central to the Autobot-Decepticon war line, and JRo didn't try to downplay the atrocities he'd committed (some of the most sadistically disturbing things Megatron did were exclusively in MTMTE flashbacks), but rather tried to distance him from them and placed the focus on the juxtapositions to emphasize change, this as a whole just resulted in Evil McEvilson getting turned into Hyper McHypocrite.
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bigification · 5 days
Text
Handlebars
Day 1:
My first day of college was a lot more stressful than I thought it would be. I finally made it to residence last night, which only gave me one night to get settled before classes started. I was nervous to meet my roommate because of all of the horror stories I had heard about them in the past, but it ended up being so much worse than I expected. In my mind, the worst outcome was some lazy douche who never cleaned up after himself. So you can imagine my shock when I knock on the door and a full grown 30 something year old man answers the door.
"Hey, buddy. The names Mike, come on in."
He looked and sounded like a jock in a college movie, but when the actor is actually 30. His voice was deep and buttery, it almost gave me butterflies. I just smiled awkwardly and walked past him through the door.
"I'm Oscar by the way." I introduced myself.
"Cool, I'll just call you Handlebars." He said, without a care in the world.
He sat down on his bed, and that was the extent of our interactions for the day.
Day 7:
It's been a week and all my other worries about roommates came true. Not only is he 15 years older than me, he's a slob. He gets home from the gym drenched in sweat and throws his gym clothes wherever without cleaning them. He doesn't do his dishes, or any chore for that matter. In fact it seems like he intentionally keeps the place dirty after I try to clean it. And whatever musky cologne he wears attacks my nose every time I open the door, it feels like the smell seeps into everything, including my clothes.
The few times that he actually wants a chore to be done, he just asks me to do it, or rather he just tells me to do it. Normally I would be happy to tell him to go fuck himself, but I always find myself doing whatever he asks. I hate it.
"Yo Handlebars, be a doll and clean the dishes for me."
"Yo Handlebars, I ran out of clean gym clothes, mind running em down to the laundry for me."
It's like he's casting a spell whenever he talks.
Day 15:
I've started to settle into routine. The things that used to bother me about Mike seem a bit more trivial now. We've even started to become pretty close. I get enthralled by his conversations about business. He goes on and on about his father's enterprises, and how they'll be his soon.
I even started going to the gym with him lately. He lent me some of his gym clothes, even if they're way too big. It just made me appreciate him more. I never really clocked how jacked he was, sometimes he goes to the gym shirtless and it shows off his massive pecs and thick biceps.
Since joining him, I've noticed my body has improved quite significantly. I used to be skinny and lanky, but there is definition starting to show throughout my body.
Day 30:
Just a month into school and I was already on my way to failing out. I just don't care about it anymore, but Mike gave me a solution. He said I could just switch programs and do business with him, and his dad would even pay for it. How could I pass that up.
Now that I've switched, it's like all stress in my life has disappeared. Business is so easy, and now I have more time with Mike. We usually have a routine of going to the gym after our last class of the day.
"Yo Handlebars, you're lookin strong man. I'd kill to grow as fast as you."
He shouted at me from across the gym, when he caught me staring at myself in the mirror. Butterflies flew through my stomach when he said that. And he wasn't wrong, I've been noticing a lot of changes in my body. My face has matured, my eyebrows are thicker, my nose is bigger, and my jawline is more square. I even have to shave now, when I never had to before college. A five o'clock shadow engulfs my face by the end of the day, especially above my lip. The rest of my body has gotten hairier too, especially around my pecs, arms, and legs. And that's not even mentioning my progress at the gym. I actually look like I belong there, my biceps have a nice roundness to them and my chest actually sticks out from my body. Those gym clothes that Mike gave me look smaller and smaller every day.
Life in the dorms has also been a dream. I've been wearing that cologne that Mike loves, and it's like I unlocked a whole new level of confidence. People seem to love listening to me talk, and people seem to respect me more.
Day 60:
This past month has been the best month of my life. Now that I'm in my mid twenties, I can drink whenever I want. Mike and I go out raves and frat parties basically every night, my body is basically used to every drug at this point. And with Mike's dad paying for college, I literally don't need to show up to lectures and I get straight A's.
"Fuck, bro. I think you're bigger than me Handlebars."
Mike said with a shocked face when we were snapping pics at the gym. We flexed beside each other, and it was obvious. My biceps dwarfed his, and his gym clothes had become really tight on me lately. The shirt was skin tight against my upper body, showing off my juicy pecs and my growing six pack. And the shorts looked like they were about to burst under the pressure of my ass cheeks and thighs, to the point that the outline of my dick was constantly visible.
"Here bro, take this."
Mike handed me a package. It was filled with gym clothes and jocks.
"Just for you Handlebars."
I yanked him in for a bro hug, I could feel myself blushing.
"You got this all for me bro?"
"Fuck yeah, man. You've been grinding it out in the gym, don't think I haven't noticed my clothes straining against those muscles. And you need something to contain that snake in your pants before we get campus security called on us."
Mike chuckled, his laugh was infectious.
Day 100:
I started in the mirror. Sometimes I barely recognize myself. The confident and cocky mask goes away when I'm alone, just leaving the caring gym bro that's on the true inside.
Damn, I think to myself, Mike is making me too sappy. I give myself a cocky smile after shaving my face, leaving me with a thick moustache. I flex, admiring my guns and bouncing my pecs. Man I look good for a man pushing his thirties.
"Fuck, handlebars. Since when were you so hairy?" Mike asked me when I left the bathroom.
"What? Are you jealous I'm manlier than you bro?" I taunted him by opening my button up wider, revealing the thick pelt of hair that covered my body.
"Nah, it's got me feelin something tho." He smirked at me.
"Hah, I fuckin knew it. You want a piece of this." I bounced my pecs.
"Don't make it gay bro, it's not like that. Just a dude admiring another dude." He blushed.
The tension between us had been building for weeks. He would stand too close when spotting me at the gym, and I'd catch him staring at me in the mirror. Not like I haven't been doin it too. We also wear less clothes around the dorm. I still got that jock strap Mike gave me a while back, I'd be lying to myself if I said it fit but I don't care, and it seems like Mike doesn't mind either. And sometimes I wear an open button up just cuz it makes my pecs pop.
Day 120:
"You have no idea how long I've waited for this." Mike whispered in my ear. His breath was heavy as he threw me against the wall. His dick was bouncing with excitement against my ass.
For context, a few hours ago we were at the gym like normal. At this point, we didn't even go to class, it was just gym and parties now. The tension had been growing at the gym forever, sometimes we'd release by foolin around in the showers, but it never went further a quick handjob when no one was lookin. It was different this time, he couldn't keep his hands off me. Broad daylight in a busy gym, his hands would be far down my shorts, teasing.
At first I was dismissive. We already got caught multiple times by campus security, so close to getting kicked out of school. If it wasn't for Mike's dad being a rich alumni, I think both of us would be long gone by now. But he knew how to push my buttons, he always has. I gave in, but had the decency to drag him by the collar to the showers. At least there we could be naked.
Ok, back to the point. I grunted as his thick arms held me in place. Mike had been working extra hard to catch up to me, and it was showin. It turned me on, feelin his muscled forearms against my shoulders. But I wasn't gonna let him win that easily. What Mike seemed to forget was the near decade I spent in the Navy before comin to college.
I whipped around, using the hot water against our skin to slip out from his pin. I pushed his shoulder, sending him tripping over my foot, which I had conveniently placed behind his. I caught him like a damsel in distress, so there was no doubt in his mind who was on top.
Within seconds, it's like my training kicked in and I had him pinned down on his stomach. The bristles of my thick mustache rubbed against the back of his ear as I whispered, "You really thought you could top me?" I asked with a chuckle.
He moaned like a twink when I stuck my cock up his ass. It took a moment for his ass to adjust to takin a beatin rather than dishin one out, but he'll get used to it. The wet fur on my forearm slid across his back as I rode him like a bull. I could almost feel his organs rearrangin to fit my 10 inch rod.
I groaned as I felt months of sexual tension release in seconds, shooting my seed all through Mike's body. He was mine. And by the looks of it, he enjoyed the ride too. A trail of his cum ran from under his pinned body, to the drain in the middle of the showers.
"You're mine."
I whispered in his ear with a shit eatin grin.
"Now clean this mess up before you dare come back to my dorm."
I pushed off his back to get to my feet. I continued rubbing my cock as I walked away, making ropes of cum cover the showers. I walked right out of the showers and into the locker room, making sure to wink at campus security on the way out. Someone always calls them, and we always get away with it Scott free, so I think they gave up. It just feels good to make people know they're beneath you, and to do it while rubbin one out.
I cleaned up and walked alone to my dorm, sat on my couch, and waited for Mike to come back. After a few minutes, he walked in without a word. He walked over to me and laid in my lap as I turned on football. I smelled his hair, making sure he actually cleaned up like I ordered.
"Good boy." I reassured him while massaging his pecs.
Day 150:
I finally moved our stuff out of my shitty dorm. Mikey's father just decided to pay for our diplomas outright, instead of trying to turn all of our F's into A's.
We moved to L.A. and I fuckin love it here. I just walk around in nothin but a jock, and people love me for it. And there are so many entrepreneurs like me, so much money to be made.
Everyone just calls me handlebars, I can't remember the last time anyone called me my name. Now that I think about it, I don't even remember what it was, but who the fuck cares. I'm handlebars, the life of the party and the best fuck in this city.
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serxinns · 4 months
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The Aftermath....
Part 2 of class 1a imagine if you wanna see part 1 go here
DISCLAIMER: this concept and idea are NOT MINE this belongs to @lets-get-kraken-boys if you wanna see the original go here
this is the alternate aftermath of what my imagined fic and what happened after that please enjoy
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Mirio, Neijire, and Tamaki all surrounded you comforting you and trying to calm you down Tamaki handed you a flower-themed handkerchief you slowly grabbed it and cleaned your face after minutes of rubbing your back, silence and more of your empty sobs Mirio broke the silence "now sunshine are you ready to talk ?" You looked up and quietly nodded
you explained how your classmates have been tormenting how Todoroki always dragging you into your dorm and cuddling you and u swore you felt him smelling your hair how Mina and Hakagure would lock you in their rooms and play and touch you everywhere even if you told them to stop and started crying once
How izuku would follow you around like some lost puppy and make you eat lunch with him even tho you would rather eat alone.
How kiri sero and denki would rip up your poor clothed to the point where you have to smack their hands and tells them to stop
iida and momo trying to break in your room whenever you didn't wanna eat dinner with your classmates or didn't want to do a study date
how Bakugo would relentlessly verbally assault you calling you all sorts of names shaming your fashion and clothing and how he would degrade you for basically everything you do! How you eat how you study how your grades are for just no reason!
The three of them were livid Mirio and Tamaki now loosing trust for Midoriya and Kirishima tamaki felt more betrayed since he actually liked Kirishima so did Mirio but now that's out of the drain and that bakugo kid just telling all these horrible lies to you you were the most talented, nicest, and greatest person of all how could egoistic lowlife just hurt their darlings feelings..
And Neijire was more jealous about how her girls were playing with her but that'll be for another time but those perverted male classmates of yours ripping your delicate clothes and putting their filthy hands on your soft clean hair and that stupid white and hair kid dragging you off and locking you away to do who knows what! She was gonna make sure those pests were gonna feel her wrath
The 3 of them realized you were still there and slowly calmed themselves down "And may I ask why are your clothes covered in..blood sorry if that was too personal" Neijire hesitated worried that it'd make you cry again you sniffled "You won't get mad at me when I tell would you?" Mirio gently grabbed both of your shoulders and looked at you with a gentle smile "Of course not! We would never get mad at you sunshine!"
You hesitated for a moment you took a deep breath and told them everything about how he kept harassing you and wanted your arm hard and started to degrade you for every single thing, and how you beat Katsuki until unconsciousness, the more you told them the more you cried "i-i didn't mean to I just wanted to go to my room and be left alone! But he yanked my arm back and kept shaming me for being a "crybaby" and the more insults he spew the angrier I got and then I snapped! I swear I didn't mean to dont hate me..!"
The more you talked about it the worse your crying got to the point you started babbling out "I didn't mean to" or "Please don't hate me" The 3 of them hugged you tightly you were going through so much! It pains them to see you like this the 3 of them looked at each other and nodded they were gonna make your classmates pay a punishment they'll never forget!, after you were done crying you heard the announcement and it was principal nezu
"Y/n l/n wherever you are please come to my office immediately y/n l/n please come directly to my office"
"They must've found out.." you slowly chuckled "I'm probably gonna get house arrest for a few days.." not like you were scared or gonna hate it heck you'll finally have some alone time without your classmates always invading you stood up thanking the big 3 while they stared at you sympathetically and also thinking of a plan
You went to the office and just as you predicted you got house arrest for 3-5 days but Katsuki a week detention and cleaning dorms duty due to the evidence of him harassing you and some of your classmates managed to confess what happened and the security cameras the two of you were both told to keep Far away from each other which you didn't mind actually but katsuki sneered and looked down grumbling to himself which patches and ice bags while your classmates were bummed out the they couldn't see you for a while
For the next 2 days Most of your classmates were trying to get in your room and hang out with you or tried to comfort you which ofc you didn't and locked the door Mina and Hakagure wanted to come in a play a little "game" but you ignored them turn up some music on your headphones untill they thought you were sleeping,
momo and Iida wanted to do study lessons with you or tried to convince you to come out your room to eat dinner but you lied saying you need to stay in and was worried you wouod get in trouble and get more days after them pestering you alot they finally left you alone
Kirishima, Sero, and Denki kept pressuring you to try and play a game with them or convince you to open the door to play one of your favorite games on a console but you refused to say you like playing on your device more and you didn't play that game anymore (that was a lie) but they kept pestering you even gaslight you saying how your room is all crampy and boring to be in and how fun it would be if they joined you in the room but you declined you didn't want those weridos anywhere around you so defeated they went off
But on the 3rd day, everything was quiet there was no knocking no classmates trying to barge in, nothing just complete silence which you were glad and brushed it off prob thought Aizawa caught them telling them not to bother you but you were so wrong
It was the day after your house arrest it was fun while it lasted you hoped that Bakugo didn't get pissed about the incident nor want to hunt you down knowing him and you dread your classmates are gonna be more clingy and obsessive than ever your mentality prepared yourself took a deep breath strangely nobody was knocking on your door to offer to walk with them
To your surprise, everyone was a bit quiet heck more silent than ever most still said hi or waved but the classmates who kept harassing you kept their heads down like Izuku and Shoto glaring down their desks in shame and envy muttering something bandages on their bodies
Kirishima, Sero, and Denki stood in utter silent looking exhausted and tried you noticed there were bandages on their hands and feet even in clean clothing you could tell they been through hell and back and were those nail marks on their wrist?
Mina and Hakagure looked as if they were about to snap at anyone whispering stuff saying "How dare they" or "We didn't do anything wrong" under their breath, Hakagure was looking at you in shame and guilt and gave you a small note saying sorry then quickly going back to their desk
Bakugo was the worst of all he looked like he had gone through hell and back of course the bandages on his face were you doing but he was clutching his stomach a bit he avoided contact with you even when training he prob said like something under his breath or something that you can barely hear but when you turned back he quickly walks away
Momo and Iida looked pissed as well momo biting her nails In anger and frustration when you asked what was going on with her she looked at you with a warm but unusual smile saying it was nothing, Iida on the other hand looked uptight busy distracting himself by reading a whole study book on his own his aura was tense and he looked like it was very annoyed with something
Lastly, it was Tokoyami the poor dark shadow was fearing for his life shivering and whimpering a bit while Tokoyami was busy comforting him saying "It's ok it's it's over now" When Tokoyami saw me he weakly waved with a small worried smile dark shadow looked at you mouthing an "I'm sorry" which you awkwardly smiled and puts thumbs up saying it's all good
One day at lunch you'd decided to sit by your best friends Jirou and Tsuyu they were both chatting with Shoji and Koda you slowly walked up to them at their table they all looked at you in shock "Oh hey y/n you out of house arrest *kero*" she said bluntly but you knew she was worried "Yea..finally took it off of me but guys I really wanna say I'm sorry-"
"no need.." shoji interrupted you "It wasn't your fault he had it coming for a while now and it seems like you were in a bad mood" Shoji reassured you "yea plus he and the others got what they deserved as well good" Jiro said in a silly venomous tone "got what they deserved? What do you mean? Were they doing normal training?" They all looked at each other worriedly and then looked at you back "You didn't know? *kero*" You nodded your head "I couldn't after class I had to go straight into my room
Tsuyu and the others looked around to see if everyone wasn't listening when the coast seemed to be Cleary she leaned closely to you "ok I'm gonna whisper it you what happened and you can't tell anyone this ok" you nodded Eagar to find out what happened and this is what she told you
Apparently, on your 3rd day of house arrest, the big 3 came into the classroom for an "educational visit" Everyone was confused at 1st about why but that's when it got serious Mirio explained how Mina, hakagure, bakugo, momo, Iida, izuku, shoto, bakugo, and tokoyami were gonna have "special training" but mirio said it with an angry and serious tone, chill went up to there spine, that's when everyone else knew that it was gonna be serious and the students who were called looked nervous and surprised and some even cautious but this was just the beginning.
While everyone else was training the boys were getting harsh lectures from Mirio, especially at Izuku, Shoto, and Bakugo about Boundaries and other stuff, and were getting harsh training by having to fight Mirio without their quirks they were repeatedly getting punched in the stomach over and over again until one of them threw up
Kirishima Sero and Denki were lifting heavy objects until their bodies couldn't take them and if they fell neijire would grab their clothes harshly on purpose and snatch them up until their clothes were turning into ripped clothing
Mina and Hakagure were also getting the same punishment by Mirio but Neijire told Him to go easy a bit but was still upset how they didn't let her join playing with cute little you so payback I guess, also Tamaki ripped them a new one about keeping their hands to themselves while using a glare they never see him do before
You were shocked by all this progressing all half of you were saying this was karma this was deserved but the other hand told you they took it a bit too far but what comes around goes around I guess you were gonna have to talk to them about what the hell happened "serves them right in my opinion" Jiro shrugged carelessly while the other agreed "they should've went a bit easier on the, but what goes around comes around I guess *kero*" everyone else nodded while eating their food while you were wondering what the fuck just happened
"Y/n! You're here!" Your thoughts were interrupted by a familiar A familiar bubbly voice called you in it was Neijire alongside Mirio and Tamaki "Ah Senpais!!" Everyone at your table was shocked and bowed a bit while you waved happily at them "I see you're out of that house arrest good you back we've been worried about you sunshine!" Mirio said with his usual smile while Tamaki shyly waved back to you "we hope your doing ok.." Tamaki quietly said and you smiled "thanks guys! I'm doing so much better honestly that house arrest was surely a need! Probably shouleve begged for more" you jokingly said
"now now let's not get into more trouble! You don't wanna get detention or worse!" Neijire said with a laugh while you playfully rolled their eyes "anyways sunshine we were just wondering you wanted to join us for a sleepover this weekend!" Neijire said 3 eagerly wanting to know the answer "Actually y/n is bus this wee-" "I mean yea i guess i own yall one"
You interrupted them while the others at your table and the rest of your classmates glared jealously and deadly at them, bakugo was about to walk over there a cuss them out but Mirio looked his way and gave a warning glare which stopped him in his tracks and went back as he growled to himself talking among the other bakusqud "alright see ya! We're gonna have so much fun!" They walked back to their table while you notice how everyone in your class was glaring at them
"Those 3rd years think they could steal our darling just because they came to them.." the others agreed trying to plot some plan "I gonna blast them off to HELL when I get my hands on them!" Bakugo sneered while still glaring at them "cmon Bakubro you know what will happen if you do" Kirishima said trying to calm down his friend "Kiris right we can't take action just yet, especially this state"
Midoriya looked down he felt guilty about how he treated you but he wasn't gonna stand there and let them steal them away from you! "It was your guy's fault anyway for going too far just remember that," said Jirou as the others glared at her "This wouldn't have happened if all would just not taken it too far"
The class may not have a plan now but when they do they're gonna make sure those 3 know who theyre messing with and Mirio tamaki and neijire will be ready for when's that's to come
You on the other hand were thankful for the 3 but are gonna talk about how far their punishment was tho but one thing it did made you a bit confident and brave and not letting the others push you around you around anymore not again
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inkspiredwriting · 2 months
Text
Game Night Gone Awry
Five Hargreeves x Fem!reader
Warnings: none
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Five Hargreeves had been looking forward to this night for weeks. For once, it wasn't about averting an apocalypse or dealing with family drama—it was about a simple game night with his siblings and his girlfriend, Y/N. He hoped it would be a chance for everyone to relax and have some fun together.
"Welcome to the Hargreeves Family Game Night!" Klaus announced dramatically as he opened the door for Y/N. "Prepare yourself for an evening of treachery and betrayal, my dear."
Y/N laughed, giving Klaus a hug. "I'll keep that in mind. Thanks for having me."
Five appeared behind Klaus, rolling his eyes. "Ignore him. He takes game night way too seriously."
"Only because it's the one night I get to be a true villain," Klaus said with a wink. "Now, let's get this party started!"
They gathered around the large dining table, which was already set up with a Monopoly board. Luther, Allison, Diego, Viktor, and Ben were all there, ready to play. Y/N took a seat next to Five, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness.
As the game began, it quickly became clear that Klaus had no intention of playing fair. He palmed extra money from the bank, swapped properties when no one was looking, and sweet-talked his way into shady deals.
"Klaus, you can't just take money whenever you feel like it," Diego complained, catching him in the act.
"What? I'm merely redistributing wealth," Klaus said innocently, stuffing the bills into his pile.
"More like embezzling," Allison said, laughing.
The game grew increasingly chaotic. Diego accused Luther of hoarding properties, Viktor got into a heated debate with Ben about the rules, and Allison tried to mediate while also attempting to build her own monopoly.
Meanwhile, Five and Y/N watched the chaos unfold with amused disbelief. "I told you it would be interesting," Five said, leaning over to whisper in Y/N's ear.
"You weren't kidding," Y/N replied, shaking her head with a smile.
Things took a turn for the worse when Diego, frustrated by Klaus's antics, flipped the board, sending pieces flying everywhere. "That's it! I'm done with this game!"
Luther sighed, rubbing his temples. "Diego, calm down. It's just a Game."
"Yeah, but it's not fun when someone's cheating," Diego shot back, glaring at Klaus.
"Cheating? Me? How dare you!" Klaus said, but his grin gave him away.
One by one, the siblings left the table, either too annoyed or too amused to continue. Eventually, it was just Five and Y/N sitting among the scattered pieces of the game.
Five looked at Y/N, a mix of apology and amusement in his eyes. "Well, that escalated quickly."
Y/N laughed, shaking her head. "Your family sure knows how to make game night memorable."
Five started to clean up the mess, and Y/N helped, the two of them working in comfortable silence. Once everything was back in order, they sat back down at the table, sipping their drinks and enjoying the relative peace.
"Despite the chaos, I'm glad you came," Five said, reaching across the table to take Y/N's hand.
"I'm glad I came too," Y/N replied, squeezing his hand. "It was actually a lot of fun. Your family is... unique, but I like them."
Five smiled, leaning in to kiss her softly. "They'll grow on you. Just like you did on me."
Y/N laughed, leaning her head on his shoulder. "I look forward to more chaotic game nights with you."
Five wrapped his arm around her, feeling a rare sense of contentment. "As long as we always end up like this, I'll take all the chaos in the world."
And so, amid the remnants of a disastrous game night, Five and Y/N found their own little slice of peace and happiness.
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azulsluver · 3 months
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I have a juicy thoughttt, hear me out for a second... For your twst bully! Au, imagine Riddle forcing the reader to attend one of the unbirthday parties.. It would be actual hell for them. Ace being an absolute shit starter as they're just trying to enjoy their tea and - whoops would you look at that. Ace " accidentally "elbowed the teacup off the table and spilt it all over them! He snickers and calls them a crybaby under his breath as the reader holds back tears of frustration. ( And somewhat failing) (⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠)
Deuce on the other hand doesn't exactly defend Ace's actions but it's clear that he's not doing anything to stop his bullshit. He literally doesn't even acknowledge what Ace did and continues snacking.
Cater on the other hand is laughing under his breath and low-key snapping pics!.. he agrees with ace and tells the reader to stop being so *sensitive*as he flicks their forehead. it was just an accident!!.. If you're good for him and tolerate his backhanded comments, he might NOT post the pics to his social media..
As for Trey, he's just sighing to himself as he cleans the reader up. His reaction is somewhat like Deuce's. While he's not defending both Cater & Ace, he's also not doing anything about it either.. At least he wipes their tears and hand feeds them a strawberry tart to somewhat comfort them. :33
As for Riddle, he knew very well what ace was doing. Luckily he warns and condemns Ace's actions. But not out of sympathy for the reader. It's because he simply wants the unbirthday party to go smoothly. If it was anywhere else he wouldn't have stepped in nor batted an eye.
During some parts, he's commenting on how much baked goods their eating and tea their drinking despite him quite literally inviting / forcing you to attend AND even pouring their tea at one point. !! It's so confusing..!! What's worse is him also staring down at the reader. Almost like silently threatening them to not act out and to mind their manners, or else they'll have a collar crushing their neck ! (⁠ ⁠≧⁠Д⁠≦⁠)
* I did NAWT expect this ask to be this long. My thoughts were just flowing and I was just nonstop typing. Anyways, I haven't re-read your bully! Au posts in a while so I do apologize if it's any inaccuracies or some spelling / grammar mistakes. *
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SQEEE THIS IS PERFECT
The tea pot is so expensive and boiling hot, why wouldn’t you cry? It’s painful as hot tea is splashed on your best outfit for the day, your skin is irritated and burns but you know better than to yell at Ace. He did apologize, it’s half-assed as he carelessly throws a thin napkin your way.
If you do manage to slip up and cry you’re getting judged hard, stop making a big deal out of it you’re embarrassing Ace…. Deuce lightly scolds Ace on spilling the tea but doesn’t put his foot down any further, you’re not a baby you got this.
It doesn’t help that Cater is cooing and shoving his phone in your face, asking you if it hurts or need a new spare of clothing.
Riddle is losing his cool, the unbirthday party is ruined because you couldn’t shut up and accept the apology. Fingers are on you, you don’t even wanna eat the snack provided of how rude Riddle is blaming you of all people!
You’ll feel a little bad that Trey sighs heavily and cleans up the mess as usual, telling you to be more careful and ignore Ace and Cater’s teasing. He’ll slide you a treat later if you cuddle up to him for subtlety being on your side.
Riddle shaming your for eating too much or too little, what, is Trey’s cooking not good? Say it to his face. Riddle would make small comments on your eating habits but Ace steals the cake. He’s really mean :( because he isn’t afraid to poke at your stomach or pinch your thighs, watch what you put in your mouth you know.
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httpshujii · 4 months
Text
❝ WANTED FOR A FATAL ATTRACTION . . . ❞
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CHAPTER Ⅰ :- ATTENTION
C.W. f!reader is an attention seeking thief, mentions of killing & execution, implications of s*x (not detailed/sugar coated), reader labelled as freak. Please let me know if I missed anything!
TAGS :- @lu-naes @coconut36 @briarbabyxo @number1morihater @kaiser1ns (comment or dm if you'd like to be tagged!)
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You don't know what you did to get such a large bounty on your head. You never killed, never found pleasure in the thought of it. Sure, you stole from the richest and you didn't bother hiding your acts.
It's amusing, how your delicate fingers can just snatch all sorts of things out of pockets. You'd find it humorous when they did catch you, when you made sure they knew that you stole something valuable.
The way their faces would contort into shock and morph into pure anger. It's an interesting reaction, you don't know why it satisfies you so much to be seen as a criminal, a known thief.
Is it the thrill it brings when doing something so fragile? Is it to prove something? You questioned your motives on more than one occasion. But it all goes down to one reason.
Boothill. An infamous outlaw, mostly works for brokers. You could never be like him, of course, you don't know how to handle arms nor do you know how he manages to eliminate people like some useless digits in an equation. But to be known by as many people as him is a need. A great wish that only the brightest star can grant, and that star sure does love to stay hidden.
You just want to be known. To be seen and to have your face stamped on the alley walls of Penacony, the word 'wanted' stated right above your head in heavy red ink. It's an indescribable urge.
You blame the lack of attention you got in your younger years. No matter how many times it's repeated, people are greedy and love to talk about themselves. You're no different. If anything, you're worse. This idea of belonging to yourself and loving yourself so much to the point where you want everyone to know every small thing about you, is a major derivative to becoming popular. Whether in a good or bad way.
You realized this power at a young age. Getting accused of cheating when you really didn't, but instead of having your belly bubble with rage at such an accusation, you felt seen. For the first time. Kids are straightforward, if you look, talk, or act weirdly, they'll label you as a "freak."
You didn't have friends, nor did you want any. Their a hindrance, nothing but pawns in a game you didn't know you were playing. You don't know why you used to think that, maybe it was cause you felt invisible. You didn't like it, but it was peaceful.
You remember smiling when the girl who accused you hissed you name towards the teacher, and then you grinned when all eyes turned to you. With that reaction, people agreed on your crime, and into punishment you went.
Cleaning the classroom for a week and retaking a harder version of the test. You took your time, enjoyed cleaning, enjoyed thinking. After all, you had no parents to go home to, no friend to visit. You lived relying on your pickpocketing skills. Stealing a sandwich from a distracted merchant, hiding an apple in your bag when looking through a store. Water bottles, sweets, juice, gum, anything you can get your sinister hands on.
You had the right to survive, just like everyone else. Even if your way bended the laws, you still had the right. At least that's what you told yourself.
As you grew up, you got smarter, more daring. Unclasping pearl necklaces from necks of rich women while complimenting them, flirting with drunk merchants that are too drunk to realize you snatch a few wads of credit, too naïve to notice, too blind by honeyed words to care.
You'd steal like it's a nine to five. You wake up every morning in your hidden shack that was an abandoned garage, brush your teeth, ruffle your hair, apply what little perfume you have left from the perfume store that you stole from a few years ago. Cool, peachy, and flowery. The scent would turn heads, only to be met with a sinister grin and a wallet out of their pockets and in your very trusty hands.
You'd buy yourself a meal, keep it packed till you get back to your humble abode.
"I'm home…"
You have no one to go back to. But these words always feel brand new when they roll out of your throat, saddened, somber. You know you'll never come home to see anyone, you'd probably be dead or on the run by the time. Every day, every night, it's the same routine.
You grew to like it, enjoy the loop of similar activities. Up until now.
As if a shock, he came in and rearranged the pattern. Forced himself into your idea of a perfect lifestyle. You're not mad, there's a reason you have his wanted poster plastered right next to your mattress on the wall of your home. You're excited to this sudden change. Giggling, you shove the drunkard you were trying to bribe away, causing him to stumble and knock himself out on the hard floor of the saloon.
You know he's here for you, it's clear with that killer smile on his lips. His hands hanging loosely on his gun holster, you pull your bottom lip into the light grip of your teeth, your smile so wide your lip slips from the caress of your wet tongue against the slightly chapped surface.
There he stands, in all his glory. The one and only Boothill. Mechanical body glinting under the yellow bulbs, complex machinery whispering a repetitive whir of pumps pumping and gears turning. Teeth akin to a shark's pointy and pearly. Pupils that rotate, gun's targets eyeing you up and down.
Under his calculated gaze, you feel seen, heard, and understood all within the span of a few seconds. Everyone around you seems non existent, they cower in the dark corners of the saloon as the predator approaches you in clicking heels on a wooden floor.
He thinks you look like a little girl. With your legs kicking the air softly, your hands resting beneath your thighs as you gaze up at him with nothing but wonder and curiosity. He doesn't know if he likes it, he's used to siren lulls of scandalous dances, spending a few hours to relish in the plush of steamy nights with what people would call models, but to him, nothing but discarded digits of pleasure. He doesn't even know why he participates in such acts. He's not a human anymore, can't feel a warm body against his, it itches him. Not being able to touch and feel and caress. It makes him go crazy, often shooting bullets at aging walls when he thinks about it too much.
He likes you. How different you are to him, how new you are to him. He feels like it's okay to slow down just this once. He takes a seat next to you. Resting his elbow on the wooden bar, his fist cushioning his cheek as his eyes stay locked on you. You imitate him. Staring at him just as intently. With just as much wonder.
"Can I buy you a drink, sugar?"
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MASTERLIST ⋮ CHAPTER Ⅱ . . .
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