#if i ever have a house i want a greenhouse

[mariacallous]

It’s the most startling thing I’ve seen in this year’s presidential campaign – the astoundingly large gap between how young men and young women plan to vote this November. Among women under age 30, an overwhelming 67% plan to vote for Kamala Harris, while just 29% say they’ll back Donald Trump. But among young men, a majority – 53% – plan to vote for Trump, while 40% say they’ll support Harris, according to a New York Times/Sienna College poll. That’s an astonishing 51-percentage-point gender gap.

It’s easy to understand why so many young women favor Harris – she has an inspiring life story, champions reproductive freedom and would break the biggest glass ceiling of all by becoming the first female president. But I’m mystified why so many young men back Trump.

Many of them seem to like Trump’s machismo. They like that he talks tough. They see him as an icon of traditional manhood. But all this raises an unavoidable question: should Trump be looked to as an icon of manhood considering that he boasted of grabbing women’s genitals, was found liable for sexual assault and had an affair with an adult film star soon after his wife gave birth? That shouldn’t be anyone’s model of manhood.

Many young men seem to admire Trump’s king-of-the-jungle vibe: he roars, he bellows, he boasts that no one can ever beat him (unless they cheat). But when you cut through Trump’s tough talk and look at the record, it becomes clear that Trump did very little for young men in his four years as president.

Whoops, I should note that if you’re a young man making more than $1m a year, Trump did do a lot for you, thanks to his colossal tax cuts for the richest 1%. But for the more than 99% of young men who don’t make $1m a year, sorry, Trump didn’t do diddly for you, other than cut your taxes a wee bit, a tiny fraction of the tax cuts that he gave to the richest Americans.

I recognize that many young men feel uncomfortable about the Democratic party, partly because some Democrats unfortunately treat men as a problem – and sometimes as the problem. If the Democrats were smart, they’d see that young men – like every other group in society – have problems that they need help with, problems like affording a home, finding a good-paying job, obtaining health insurance, affording college and having enough money to raise a family.

Regardless of how you feel about Harris, the truth is that her policies will do far more for young men than Trump’s policies will. It’s not even close. She is serious about lifting up young men and young women, and she has plans to do so.

Unlike Trump, Harris will help with soaring rents and home prices. She has pledged to build 3m new homes to help drive down housing prices. In another big step to make housing more affordable, she plans to give a $25,000 subsidy to first-time home buyers. Unlike Trump, Harris is also attacking the problem of high grocery prices – she has promised to crack down on price-gouging at the supermarket.

For many young men, health coverage and high health costs are a problem. On those matters, Trump will only make things worse. He has repeatedly promised to repeal Obamacare. That would be a disaster for millions of young men and women because they would no longer be able to be on their parents’ health plan until age 26. What’s more, repealing Obamacare will push up healthcare prices.

Many young people complain about their mountains of student debt. Trump won’t help on that; he has condemned the idea of forgiving student loans. In contrast, Harris wants to expand Biden’s debt cancellation program, which is hugely popular with young Americans. What’s more, Trump backed huge cuts in student aid – a move that would make it harder for young people to afford college. Harris is eager to make college more affordable by increasing student grants. Not only that, she is looking to what Tim Walz, her running mate, has done as Minnesota’s governor. He has made Minnesota’s state universities and community colleges free for students from middle-class and lower-income families.

If you’re a young man frustrated by how little your job pays, you should know that Trump – doing a big favor for his corporate allies – did nothing to raise the $7.25-an-hour federal minimum wage. Harris strongly supports raising the minimum wage.

Trump has made two big promises to make your life more affordable. Without giving details, he says he will cut auto insurance prices nationwide in his first 100 days in office. He also says he will cut energy and electricity prices in half during his first year in office. If you believe those far-fetched promises, then you’ll probably believe me when I say I have a bridge to sell you.

If you’re a young father or if you hope to have a family someday, you should know that Harris’s policies will do far more for you than Trump’s. Recognizing how expensive it is to raise a family, Harris has called for creating a children’s tax credit of $3,000 per child per year and $6,000 for a newborn.

To improve work-family balance, Harris has long pushed to enact paid family and medical leave so that people can take much-needed paid time off to spend with their newborns or care for sick parents or children. (Most Republicans oppose a paid leave law because their corporate donors oppose it.) Trump doesn’t have similar pro-family policies – his main policy proposals are huge tax cuts for corporations and the ultra-rich and large tariffs on imports that will dangerously push up inflation.

Although many young Americans don’t realize it, Biden and Harris have worked hard to create good-paying jobs for those who don’t go to college. Biden and Harris fought to enact three important pieces of legislation – an infrastructure bill, a green energy bill and a computer chips bill – that will create about 1m construction jobs, factory jobs and other jobs across the US, many of them unionized jobs with strong benefits.

If you’re one of the many young people at Starbucks, REI, Apple or elsewhere who support unionizing as a way to increase your pay and improve your working conditions, you should know that Harris is a strong supporter of unions and enthusiastically backs legislation to make it easier to unionize. But billionaire Trump dislikes labor unions. When he was president, he and his appointees did dozens of things, large and small, to weaken unions and create roadblocks for workers seeking to unionize.

There’s no denying that Trump’s tough talk makes many young men feel good. But tough talk is cheap. It won’t help anyone pay the rent, afford college or raise a family. Harris doesn’t talk as tough as Trump, but her record and her policies make undeniably clear that she will do far more for America’s young men and women than Trump will.

I don't agree with every point he makes here, and I also don't think a lot of young men are voting based on rational and objective things like whose policies will benefit them most. But I still thought this was an interesting read.

[moonlit-void-to-the-far-unknown]

As much as I hated the Lila/five pairing just on character stand points and the fact five and Lila would honestly never do that to Diego, like come on, but like if Ritu Arya was looking at me and laughing like she did in the like montage of them moving through the timelines and was trying to make the best of it by being excited about gumballs, I would end up falling in love with her just as fast as five did. Like we would all fold and fall in love with her in like .2 seconds. And don’t you even try to deny it, look at this beautiful woman and tell me you wouldn’t be heart eyes at her

Now my opinions on how they could have done their whole thing below:

Do I wish they had made it a ‘brother-sister companionship, as two people who truly get what the other has been through and are each others wobbly support system’ yes that would have been amazing, maybe give five a long term girlfriend in the 6 years, one who he’s having trouble connecting with because he’s been through 3 end of the worlds and 45 years alone and then the commission stuff. And in the 7 years Lila and five are trying to get home, they both connect with the other on how they feel about it all and five helps Lila understand Diego more by explaining why he is the way he is, and Lila helps five understand how to open up to his partner, and sure if you want them to kiss for whatever reason, make it like a

“Yeah that was weird right? I thought it was like a thing we had but yeah let’s never speak of this, and we do not tell Diego, I don’t need him trying to stab you” and then have a lil laugh session. And maybe five hides the notebook cause he kind of likes the life in the greenhouse but the fight is more

“I have children who need me! You have a girlfriend who loves you! We have to try.” And five being so tired of the running to save the world gets on the train, goes home but as they blink to the house five wants to go back to that peaceful world, of no running of safety in a bubble. The whole explanation of they were lost for 7 years happens, five maybe is still a bit of a dick because like emotions and things. We learn what’s happening with Ben and Jennifer.

The whole store fight happens

Maybe he takes his partner maybe he doesn’t but he ends up blinking back to the subway platform again and then we get the meeting with the other fives, we understand that the end has to be a full sacrifice of the siblings.

Five returns to the hotel, and everything continues, Lila and fives partner go to the subway, but both of them get off at the last minute. And five finds them and his partner who has been with the siblings this whole time or most of the time just shrugs cause five is what she wants and she doesn’t wanna be in a timeline unable to remember him, idk you can make something up but they all go back to the hotel, and the ending happens, but five holds his partners hand and she just smiles at him as they are erased from everything, and yeah would it be a little odd? Sure.

But it would be better then what they ended up doing which was five hurts his brother and dies feeling alone and used.

They could have had five and Lila end up romantic but turned it into something different. And they realize it’s not a thing they ever wanted really it’s more they were stuck together for so long emotions got a little hazy.

Give five someone, but don’t give him someone who is already someone else’s entire heart.

Diego and Lila have 3 kids together *4 if you count Stanley as a figurative son*

Five deserved his own person, like Luther deserved to have sloane, and Allison deserved to have Ray, Viktor deserved more time with sissy, and Klaus with Dave. You don’t have to pass one around to the others just because she’s still there. You can give us a new person for five. It’s not even the weirdest thing this show has ever done -Klaus having a cult cough cough-

They had a way to do this, and they just picked the worst timeline train to stop on.

[koostattoos]

➳ There’s Only Me When There’s You || j.jk

~ Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

~ Genre: slight enemies to lovers, high school au, fluff, MAJOR angst, first love, young love (Inspired by 2000's film A Walk to Remember by Nicholas Sparks)

~ Summary: Being new was tough. Starting out in a new school and new town without any idea where to go or any friends was tougher. When coming across Jungkook and his friends, school hadn't got any easier. When you get paired with Jungkook for a project your life becomes hell, or was it heaven?

~ Warnings: MAJOR character death, a fight happens, mentions of a hospital, mentions of blood, fluff, fluff, fluff! 190811!jungkook (iykyk), jk’s lowkey an asshole but he’s actually the sweetest, they’re so incredibly adorable i’m sobbing, use of petnames (mostly baby)

~ word count: 15.1k

• currently playing: star by colde

a/n: this is pure fiction. pls don’t discern the characters in the story to them irl! happy reading! 🫶🏼

~

This past summer your family moved to a new city. Yongsan was small, that’s what you liked about it. But your family wanted to get away from the big bustling city of Seoul. They thought it’d be better for you. Moving was exciting to you. Being in a new place and all. The house they had bought was small, it had two bedrooms, with a bathroom, and a big enough living space for the three of you.  

The people in the neighborhood were nice. They welcomed you with fresh food and some plants to plant in the mini greenhouse next to the yard. It was very thoughtful of them. Tomorrow is your first day at your new school. You were going into your senior year. They say it’s supposed to be one of the most exciting times in high school.  

After you finish unpacking your things you walk into the living room where your dad was sitting. He was on the phone talking with the moving people to figure out where the rest of your stuff was. And your mom was in the kitchen preparing dinner. You decide to take yourself out of the house and explore the small town you now call home.  

Making sure your parents knew where you were, you turn your head around the corner of the kitchen and call for your mom. 

“I’m gonna go out and look around town, is that okay?”  

“Yeah, sure. Just be careful. Don’t go too far and be back before the sun goes down.” she tells you 

Nodding your head, you turn to put your shoes on and make sure you have your phone with you. The air outside was nice. It was still mid-summer but the weather around this time seemed to cool down.  

When you walk into the village you meet a lot of nice people. Mrs. Kim was the first person you met. “Hi honey. Are you new around here? I don’t think I’ve ever seen your face around here”. She ran one of the local restaurants.  

“No, I’ve actually moved here a few days ago. My family and I live nearby. I just wanted to come in and see what was around here. So, I know somewhat my way around.” you explain to her. She nods her head and gasps as an idea pops up into her head.  

“Well, if you ever need anything, please stop by. I’ll be glad to help” she says to you with a sweet smile.  

“Thank you, Mrs. Kim. I’ll keep that in mind. Have a good night” you smile at her and walk away to explore more of the village. There wasn’t much to do. There were a few bookstores you had walked past and a few other markets. Deciding to head back home you text your mom that you were on your way. Without looking at where you were going you bumped into a firm chest. When you look up, you’re met with a teenage boy. His hair was a bit of a mess but still maintained. He was actually rather cute.  

Before you could say anything, he says, “Are you okay?” you pause for a minute trying to collect your thoughts. He looks blankly at you waiting for you to respond. Finally, after staring at him for what felt like an eternity, you answer him. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m sorry for bumping into you” you bow your head slightly to him as you apologize.  

“It’s alright. Are you new around here? I don’t think I’ve seen you before” you respond the same way you answered to Mrs. Kim. You tell him that you had just moved here a few days ago with your family. He nods his head and excuses himself. But not before he introduces himself.  

“I’m Jungkook by the way.” He has a faint smile on his lips. You tell him your name. “It’s nice to meet you, Jungkook” he nodded and slowly started to walk away. “It was nice to meet you too” Finally, you both bid goodbye to each other and you make your way back home.  

~ 

Jungkook and his friends were out tonight. There was a bridge near one of the old farms, no one was allowed near there, yet they all agreed to meet up.  Taehyung brought along his girlfriend and her friends. Their other friend Jimin decided to tag along with them.  

Jungkook came up late (as usual) and Taehyung walks up and grabs his best friend by the nape of his neck playfully. “Where the hell have you been. We were all waiting for you” he says 

“Don’t worry about it, I’m here now, aren’t I?”  

Taehyung laughs at him. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Does anyone have the drinks?” Jimin walks up next to them and pulls out a case of Soju from the trunk of his car and places it next to him. Taehyung’s girlfriend, Ara, holds him by his waist and asks Jimin to pass her a drink. Her friend, Sooha, hasn’t taken her eyes off Jungkook since he got there. He walks over to Jimin and grabs a bottle for himself. As he stands next to Jimin, Sooha makes her way to the case and takes one. She ‘tries’ to open the bottle but fails. She pouts her lips and looks up to Jungkook “Can you open this for me Jungkookie”  

He looks down at her and grabs the bottle from her hand and opens it for her.  

“Who’s jumping first?”  

Jimin speaks up “I think you should Kook. Since you were late, you should make up for it” Taking a swig of his drink Jungkook shrugs his shoulders and places his down. He takes off his pants and his black t-shirt. He stands on top of the bridge and flips everyone off.  

Then, he jumps backwards into the river full of water. And yells at the top of his lungs  

“Fuck all of you!” 

With all the noise they were making a farmer flashed a light towards them.  

“Hey! Who’s over there! You shouldn’t be here! He yells at them.  

“Shit, shit, shit!” Jungkook says under his breath swimming back to where his clothes were.  

“Hurry get in the car!” Taehyung urges his girlfriend.  

Everyone fled and Jungkook was left to fend for himself.  

“Is that you Jeon!” the man says 

“Fuck” he runs for his car and speeds off.  

~ 

The next morning, Jungkook walks out of his room into the living room. His mom was already in the kitchen.  

“I heard what you did last night Jungkook” she says with a stern voice  

“Why do you always get yourself stuck in these situations! I mean this is the third time already and school has just barely started a couple weeks ago! You are so irresponsible. And you know what ever since you started hanging out with that boy Taehyung, that’s all you’ve been doing is getting in trouble” she yells at him in disappointment.  

“You’re hanging out with the wrong crowd here Jungkookie, you need to find new people to hang out with” she shakes her head at him and walks away.  

He sits there thinking about what his mother said.  

~  You wake up to your alarm blaring in your ear. Today was your first day at your new school. The feeling of anxiety kept you up at night and you barely had any sleep. The clock read 7:00 a.m. When you walk out of your room, you’re hit with the smell of breakfast. Walking into the living room your father is nowhere to be seen. Your mom had told you that he went out to find a job locally. 

“So how do you feel about being at a new school?” 

Registering her question in your sleepy state you make up a smile and answer her. “I’m nervous, I’ll be fine though” she nods her head at you and goes to make her morning coffee.  

Done with breakfast you walk over to your bathroom to clean yourself up. You haven’t bothered with makeup since freshman year. It only made your face feel gunky with the number of products you used to feel pretty.  

Your outfit was simple. It was a soft pink cardigan with a white skirt matching it. You tied your hair up into a half ponytail. Leaning down to pick up your backpack from your floor; you make your way to the front door and tell your mom goodbye. 

 “I love you, I’ll be back soon mom”  

“Okay, I love you too honey. Have a good day at school.” she tells you.  

The school was only a five-minute walk from your house.  

~ 

“Yo, check out her sweater,” Jimin says 

You were wearing a pastel-colored cardigan with flowers on it. It was a bit beat up because you’ve worn it so many times. But you still liked to wear it.  

“Yeah I think I wore it when I was nine” Sooha chuckles  

They see you walk past them with a few books in your hand and hardly any idea where to go.  

“Um excuse me, do you know where the front office is?” You ask one of them. You hadn’t noticed Jungkook, but he pays attention to you.  

Taehyung speaks up and laughs “It’s down that way” he points into a direction. You nod you head at him “Cute sweater” Sooha says sarcastically. Not reading her sarcasm you tell her “Thank you” and make your way over to the office. When you’re out of sight they all begin to laugh. Jungkook with a faint smile painted on his lips. 

~ 

“Jungkook to the principal's office, Jungkook to the principal's office” is heard over the intercom. Groaning, he makes his way over to the front of the school where he’s needed. He knocks on the door and Mr. Kang holds his hand up and tells him to wait outside as he finishes up talking to another student.  

A few minutes pass by and when the student walks out the principle motions his hand for Jungkook to come in. He walks through the door and shuts it.  

“So, Mr. Jeon, I’ve heard from your mother you’re causing trouble again? I thought we spoke of this.” 

Jungkook doesn’t say anything. He sits in silence and only waits for Mr. Kang to continue.  

“I also couldn’t help but notice your grades have slipped during last year’s final exam. And ever since school started a few weeks ago you already have such low grades.” Sitting in the chair in front of Mr. Kang’s desk he slouches, shakes his head, and laughs in disbelief.  

“Your absences and tardies have affected you severely. You haven’t always been like this Jungkook. I think it’s time for you to seek out new friends and join a new crowd.” Mr. Kang places his hands over his desk and continues.  

“From now on, you will stay after school to be tutored and I have asked the clean-up committee if they are able to let you work to help clean up around the school on the days you don’t have tutoring. I expect you to follow my instructions. If not, there will be consequences. Do I make myself clear Mr. Jeon”  

Sighing in defeat, he nods.  

“Yes, Mr. Kang” 

“Good. Now get out of my office and get to class” 

~ 

 When you got to the front office. They gave you your schedule for your classes for this year. When you walk out of the office you bump into someone. You don’t get to catch a glimpse of who the person was as they continued walking and didn’t bother to say sorry. Brushing it off, one of the student aids in the office is instructed to show you around campus.  

After the tour was done you walk to the first class of the day. Botany. Plants always caught your interest when you were younger. You always wanted to see the cherry blossom trees. They were looked beautiful no matter what time of the year it was.  

As you walk into class all eyes were on you. You slowly make your way to the front and the techer finally notices you.  

“Ah, you must be our new student. I’m Mr. Jung. Do you mind introducing yourself?” 

“Well, I’m from Seoul, and I’ve moved here only a couple of days ago. I hope you treat me kindly” you say to the class.  

When you say your name a certain person’s ears perk up. Jungkook looks to the head of the class and remembers you from the day before. The girl who bumped into him. Next to him he hears his friend, Taehyung, make a comment about you. “She looks” he pauses “Like a loser” he laughs quietly next to Jungkook. He disagrees strongly, but he laughs along with his friend.  

When you make your way over to your seat. Taehyung pushes his foot in front of you and you trip and almost land on your knees. If it weren’t for the desks next to you. Your face turns beet red out of embarrassment. The whole class starts to laugh at you. Quietly making your way to your seat, you sit down and take your things out of your backpack.  

“Alright everyone quiet down. Let’s start with today’s lesson”  

Completely blocking out what the teacher says you only think about when today was going to end.  

~ 

During lunch you sat by yourself. You had tried talking to some of the kids in your class, but they only said a few words to you before walking away. You shook it off and thought maybe you could find someone to talk to tomorrow. As you take your food out, you don’t notice a group of people walking to the table you’re sitting at. When you look up you see the boy who had tripped you earlier. You also take notice of the boy you bumped into yesterday.  

“Oh, hi Jungkook! I didn’t know you went here” you say to him. But the boy in front of him looks confused at him. There was girl next to Jungkook. She gave you a disgusted look as you spoke. 

“Kook, you know her?” he points at you. You have a look of confusion on your face as well. What you’re not prepared for was the boy’s response.  

“I don’t, I don’t know how she knows my name” he only shrugs. This has you extremely confused.  

“Alright weirdo looks like you have no friends. Now I know why” The boy you had yet to know the name of walks away. But before Jungkook could follow his group he looks back at you for a second, then he makes his way.  

~ 

After school you decide to take a walk into town. You stop by Mrs. Kim’s and hang out there and talk to her. You felt you needed to take on a small job to help boost your family a little bit. So, you bring it up to her. “Mrs. Kim?” you say “Yes, dear”  

“I was wondering if you were hiring? I want to help out my family. We're not really doing the best right now and I wanted to see if I could do a small job for you?” you ask hoping she would say yes.  

“That’s so sweet of you” she places a hand over her chest  

“Of course, I can get you something to do here. Can you start tomorrow after school?” she asks 

“Yes!” With that you make your way back home.  

~  It was getting close to the end of school. Your plan was to go straight to Mrs. Kim’s place so you could officially start your new job. But, of course, your plan had to be messed up in some way. Because when you make your way to the front of the school to go on your way. You run into Jungkook’s friend group. You try your best to ignore them, but their yelling of your name stopped you in your tracks. 

Taehyung walks up to you. He only stands in front of you before he speaks up.  

“Look new girl, this is a scary world we live in. But I think it’d be best if you kept your distance from other people. You know, since you’re new and all. Some kids find it a little weird when you know their name when they’ve never spoken to you. Okay?” he says in a mocking tone. Jungkook stands there and watches it all happen. They walk away. But the girl that gave you a look earlier bumps into your shoulder.  

“Oops!” she says as she walks over to Jungkook’s side and locks her arm with his. What you don’t notice when you turn back around is that he removes her arm from his and takes a different route from the others.  

~ 

It’s been almost a week since you started at your new school. You still hadn’t made any progress with making new friends. You didn’t mind though. You liked to keep to yourself anyway. What threw you off still was the way Jungkook had denied that he knew you. And the way he looked at you every time you walked into class.  

Everything about him confused you. When you walk into class today, he does the same thing. He looks at you but when you look back at him, he looks away. The boy you had now learned his name was Taehyung only looked at you as if you were some weird creature. You sat down at your desk in the back of the class and waited for class to start. Mr. Jung started the lesson and started to explain what he had planned.  “Okay class, today I have a partner project planned” he says.  

“You all have to make a presentation and I will provide you with a plant. You must discuss and explain how the operation of a plant affects our environment.  This will be due by the end of this month. Any questions?”  

Taehyung raises his hand “Yes, Mr. Kim”  

“Will we get to pick our partners?” he asks 

“I have already assigned partners so; no, you do not get to choose who you work with.”  

“Dammit” he says under his breath  

I have put your names up on the sheet I put in the front of the room. Please look at it as you make your out at the end of class” 

You weren’t too worried about who you’d be partnered with. You just hoped you hadn’t gotten paired with Taehyung or any of his group. When you walk up to the sheet of paper you read your name next to Jeon Jungkook.  

~ 

Spending the majority of your time at Mrs. Kim’s washing a few dishes here and there. You decide to work on part of your assignment for Mr. Jung’s class. As you took your things out of your bag you heard the beeping sound of someone entering the restaurant.  

A drink is placed on your table. You look up to see it was Jungkook.  

“Hi” he says quietly 

Ignoring him you go back to what you were doing. Sighing, he sits down at your table and puts a hand over your book. Looking up at him with an annoyed look on your face you puff out air from your nose with furrowed brows.  

“Do I know you?” you say in a sarcastic voice 

He scoffs at you and looks down at the floor. His elbow is resting on the table while the other is laid in his lap. “C’mon now don’t be like that”. He can’t be serious. After acting like he had no clue who you were and letting his friends treat you like trash he wants to act like you’re in the wrong.  

Furious, you pick up your things and try to walk out of the restaurant. Before you can make it out of the door you feel a hand tug on your arm. You stop in your tracks, and you hear Jungkook open his mouth to speak. Yet, nothing comes out. Turning around to face him and raise your eyebrows at him, waiting for him to say something.  

“Look, I came here so we could work on our project. I got you as my partner and I can’t fail this project.”  

Deciding not to be petty you oblige. You shake your head and walk back to the table you were sitting at.  

During the middle of working on your project Jungkook speaks up.  

“Um, look. You’re smart right? Do you think you can tutor me after school?” he asks out of the blue. You look up at him with a surprised look on your face. Should you really do this? After how he’s treated you? You think for a moment before you reply.  

“Okay” you tell him. There’s too much hate in this world. You take the nicer route and agree with him.  

He smiles. 

“Okay, great. What days are you available?” he asks. You begin to plan out the days you would tutor Jungkook and the days you’d be working with Mrs. Kim. This is more than you thought you’d take on. But if you power through, you would be okay.  

~ 

You told Jungkook you were available on the weekends and some days of the week. It was Saturday. You told him to meet you at the library at 8:00 a.m. The library opened an hour earlier than that, so you decided to show up a little earlier than planned to catch up on some of your other class assignments.  

When you look at the clock again it reads 8:17. He was late. Not having his phone number, you weren’t able to text him. It’s not when you hear the silent panting of someone coming up behind you that you begin to place your things back on the table.  

“I’m sorry I’m late. I woke up late and I completely forgot to set an alarm”  

You look down to the table and audibly sigh  

“It’s okay, let’s just start on this so you don’t have to be here as long as you should be”  

Finally caught up with his breath, he closes his mouth and stares at you. He takes his seat next to you and pulls out his textbooks. The book you had placed on the table had some loose papers in it. One of them being something for your eyes only. It fell on the floor, and you hadn’t noticed. Jungkook leans to pick it up. The only word he read at the top of the paper was ‘List’. Realizing what he had in his hand you snatch the paper from his hold.  

“What is that” he asks. “It’s a list of things I’d wish to do in my life” he nods his head and looks back down to his paper. “What’s so bad on the list that you grabbed it out of my hand like that?” You clear your throat and answer him. “There’s nothing bad, they’re just some things I’d like to do with the time that I have” Before he can ask what you mean you clap your hands quietly. “Let’s just start studying”  

Without pushing any further, he agrees.  

The next day at school you walk in and see Jungkook again. He’s standing with his friends by his locker. That same girl that bumped into you is standing next to him. You walk towards them. When you get closer, they’re all laughing at something you didn’t hear. You move your attention to Jungkook. “Jungkook, are we still on for Saturday?” you ask him. He looks around at his friends. They’re laughing at what you just said. 

He has a faint smile on his lips. He looks back up at you and says, “You wish”. You’re once again left, confused. You walk away and hear them all laughing again. “Oooh that’s gotta hurt.” Taehyung said. His arm wrapped around his girlfriend he starts laughing into his neck.  

~  Jungkook was on a late-night drive. There was a small garden just past the school library. Nobody went there except for old people and sometimes the gardeners to take care of the plants. “What the hell” he sees you make your way over to the entrance of the garden. He rolls his window down and yells out your name. 

You turn around scared half to death at the loud voice that just called your name. When you see Jungkook you continue your way over to the garden.  

“Hey! Wait!”. The engine of his car is turned off and you hear the slam of his door. He’s running up to you and you’ve slowed down your pace.  

“What are you doing out here so late? And why are you by yourself, there’s weird people out at this hour”  

“Well, that wouldn’t be a problem because according to your friends I’m placed under that category”  

You begin to make your way over to the flowers. There was a magnolia tree with a wooden bench underneath. Taking a seat under the tree some of the flowers fell off the stem and landed on the bench. Jungkook takes his seat next to you and looks up at the sky. Tonight was quiet. The rustling of the wind against the leaves of the tree is soothing.  

“Are you ever gonna tell me about that list?” 

You turn your head to him “Why would I? And why do you suddenly have any interest in me? What is it to you?”  

“I just want to be your friend; I know it’s been tough for you ever since you got her-” you cut him off before he can continue his sentence. “What the hell do you know? I’ve been treated like shit since I got to the school and it’s because of your friends.” 

He’s left speechless. His intention was never to make you feel like this. The reason why he acted like that is because his friends acted like that. Jungkook and Taehyung have always been friends. He would always follow Taehyung’s lead. They did everything together. Their friend group only expanded with the added years.  

He looks down in shame. Feeling guilty for the way he’s been treating you. You break the silence and switch to another topic.  

“That list” you say. This catches his attention as he looks up slowly and waits for you to continue.  

“I made it a few years ago. I want to try and fulfill it as much as I can” you smile down at your lap. Thinking about possibly doing the million things you wrote down on that piece of paper. “I want to visit a forest of cherry blossom trees. I’ve always had a fascination with them. They look so pretty, it’s a shame that they only bloom once out of the whole year. They don’t live that long. Just to experience them once would be amazing.” 

Jungkook sits and listens. “You’re really into mother nature. Huh?” he says. “It’s really great, how the Earth becomes so beautiful with the plants that surround us.” You smile at that. Looking around at the flowers planted in the grounds of the garden. You could talk endlessly about them.  

And you do that night with Jungkook.  

Out of nowhere in the comfort of the silence between you two he brings it up again.  

“What else is on that list? What’s the first one you have written down?” he asks curiously. You look down at your lap and smile.  

“That’s classified information Jeon Jungkook” you look up at him. Laughing and nodding his head he puts his hands up in the air.  

“Alright fine, then, what else is on there?” 

“Hmm” you think for a second.  

“I wanna experience love. The way they put it in movies. I want to experience that love so bad.” you sigh 

Jungkook looks at you and listens. “Another thing on that list is to learn how to cook. My mother makes it look so easy” you chuckle. 

“Okay what’s one more thing on there” he asks  

“I want to get a tattoo” 

The list went on and on and he sat there listening to you the whole night. 

Jungkook hears rustling in the bushes behind him. He brushes it off and looks at you as you speak about your passion for nature.  

~ 

Today was Jungkook’s birthday. It was also Saturday. You scheduled today to help tutor him. When he walks up to your front gate, he knocks on it and waits for someone to open it. Not expecting your father to open it, he gives Jungkook a glare. 

“What do you want and what are you doing here?” he says in a low voice. He’s heard a few words about the Jeon boy. The boy was a troublemaker. He didn’t do good in school, and he had nothing going for him except for being popular. Your father was skeptical, but when he hears you walk up to the gate, he settles down a bit, guard still put up high. 

“Dad, it’s okay. I invited him over; I told him I’d help him with his studies.” 

He looks over at you with confusion written all over his face. “Why are you doing that sweetheart? This boy is bad news” he points his finger at Jungkook, and he rolls his eyes.  

“Because Dad, there’s too much hate going around in this world. I think giving him a second chance is greater than having no chances at all.” you kiss him on the cheeks and only slightly agrees with you. You walk back to the house and wait for Jungkook to walk in.  

But your father stops him in his tracks. “Listen, if you try or do anything stupid with her, I’m kicking your ass. You understand?” Jungkook looks up at him and nods. He makes his way over to you quickly trying to ignore your father’s stare.  

~  When he enters your house, it’s filled with plants everywhere. A few boxes are left to be unpacked but the house is mostly filled. Entering your room, you have flowers decorating the walls of your room. Your window is open and looks out to a tiny garden in your backyard.  

The books spread around your floor are open to different pages about math. Jungkook had been struggling in it and considering your already high grade in calculus he should be in good hands.  

“I heard around school that it’s your birthday today. I stopped by Mrs. Kim’s and got you this.” You walk over to your kitchen and pull out a plastic bag. It was a bowl of miyeokguk. The seaweed soup that your mother cooks for you for your birthday every year. He looks up at you and smiles.  

“Thank you, you didn’t have to get me anything.” 

“Well it is your birthday. Everybody deserves something on their special day” you say cheerfully.  

Sighing you look down at the books on your floor and say, “Let’s get started shall we?”  

~ 

“You’ll never believe what I saw the other night” Sooha says. She pulls out her phone to show everyone what she was talking about. It was a picture of you and Jungkook sitting at the garden talking. “What the hell is he doing sitting and talking with her?” Taehyung laughs. “Yeah, I thought JK didn’t know her” Jimin says.  

“Yeah well looks like their best friends” Sooha pauses.  

“I have an idea” Ara says with a smirk on her face.  

“Come inside”  

She takes them to her room and opens her laptop. She pulls up an old picture of you from your old school. She had to do some digging to find it. The picture was of you at a dance. You had your makeup and hair done. And you were wearing a long silky blue dress. Ara clicks on it and begins planning out her idea. She crops your body out of the picture and pastes it onto a picture with a bed with red satin sheets on it.  

“This is gonna be so good” she chuckles 

~  Sitting in the library, you have a book in your hand about cherry blossom trees. It explains so much about things you hadn’t known about them, and your head is so deep into the book you don’t realize Jungkook pulling out a chair next to you. You look up to see him looking at you.  

“What are you reading?” You pull the book up close to his face so he can read it. “Ahh, the encyclopedia of the cherry blossom tree. Have you read anything more interesting about it?”  

“I read that they symbolize the beauty of both life and death. Spring is when they bloom and it’s the start of a new life. This is what I love so much about them, they have such beautiful meanings to them” 

“Hmm, that is really interesting” Jungkook says.  

You put your book down and furrow your brows at him. “What do you want Jeon, were in public you know? Someone can see you sitting here.” He scoffs and shakes his head. “Is it so hard to believe that I want to be friends with you? Maybe even something more, possibly? Why do you think I’ve spent so much time with you lately?” he raises his eyebrows at you this time. Trying to read your expression. You stare into his eyes and try to process the words that just came out of his mouth.  

After pausing, Jungkook leans in. His face close to yours, lips almost touching. His forehead leans against yours and he smiles. Jungkook closes his eyes and places a hand over your cheek. “I’ll see you after school tomorrow, okay?” he says under his breath.  

Taking a deep breath, you nod your head.  

~ 

During lunch the next day, you walked out of class to make your way to the roof of the school, where you always hung out, but you see Sooha from the corner of your eye. She walks up to you and places a hand on your arm.  

She calls out your name. “Hey, look. I need your help with something. Could you follow me to the courtyard please?” she asks in a soft tone.  

“Sure, but what for?” 

“Ugh enough with the questions already! Just follow me, it’ll be super quick.”  

“Um okay” 

As you make your way down the halls and to the exit of the building, you walk down the steps into the courtyard space where everyone was. When you get there, it becomes silent. All eyes are on you. Then, Jimin bursts out laughing. Taehyung is clutching his stomach because of how hard he’s laughing. Everyone has their phone in their hand, and they all point at it. “Oh?” Sooha says. She picks up Ara’s phone and shows it to you.  

“Is this you?” When you look at the phone, it’s a picture of you. It’s the picture from your junior year at your dance. Your body was laid on a red bed. Your clothes were edited to make it seem like you weren’t wearing anything. The text above the picture said ‘___ The Slut?’  

You feel a burning sensation behind your eyes. Your vision starts to become blurry. With everyone laughing at you; you turn around too embarrassed to be in front of anyone. But when you try to make it to the exit of the courtyard you bump into someone. You look up and you see Jungkook. “Hey, what’s wrong” he moves your hair out of your face and holds you cups your cheeks. He wipes your tears with his thumb.  

You hold on to his wrist and push him away. You run out, wishing the ground would swallow you whole. 

“Wait!” Jungkook yells after you. He turned around to see what had happened while he was gone.  

“What the hell did you do Sooha” he says furiously. He clenches his jaw and balls his hands up into a fist. Taehyung makes his way over to him with his arms crossed over his chest.  

“What JK? It was just a little bit of fun, what the fuck is wrong with you. You haven’t been hanging out with your real friends. You’re always spending time with the slut” he laughs.  

The amount of hate Jungkook feels in his blood right now is too much to handle. He’s never felt this angry towards someone. He rushes toward Taehyung and punches him on the cheek.  

“Jungkook!” Ara screams at him. Jungkook repeatedly hits him until he’s physically tired. Jimin reaches Jungkook’s shirt and pulls him away. “Enough man. He’s bleeding all over the place! Calm the fuck down!” It’s Jimin’s turn to yell, but he doesn’t care. All he cares about right now is finding you.  

He rushes his way out of the courtyard and runs in the direction he saw you walk away in.  

Finally spotting you in the front of the school he runs after you.  

“Hey!” he calls your name softly. After catching up to you he places his hands on your cheeks again.  

“What did they do? Huh? I swear to God, I’ll fucking hurt them even more if you tell me what’s wrong” Tears are streaming down your face. Seeing you cry makes him feel an ache in his chest. Jungkook tries his best to wipe them away. When you see his knuckles, they’re covered in blood. “Are you okay?” you ask him.  

“Baby, I’m fine. It’s you that I’m worried about right now.” 

You turn in his hold, but he refuses to let you walk away from him. He holds you by your arms and makes you look into his eyes. He quietly says your name. “Tell me what happened” he says in a low voice. You look up at him and completely break down.  

He pulls you in closer to his chest and wraps his arms around you gently. “They embarrassed me. So bad, I can’t do this right now.” you cry into his neck. He kisses the crown of your head and then your forehead. “I’m here, baby.” he says to you. Stroking the back of your head as you weep in his arms.  

~ 

Jungkook drove you home that day. After he parked in front of your house, he walked you to the front gate. Walking side by side you turn to face him. “Thank you for today, Jungkook. I don’t know how I’d repay you” you tell him. He looks down at you and smiles. “You don’t need to repay me, as long as you’re okay then I’m okay. Alright?” 

Nodding your head up at him you realize just how close your faces are. He looks down to your lips and back up to your eyes. His head leaning in slowly, hands placed lightly on your hips. Then, the buzzer of the gate opens and reveals your father.  

Standing, patiently he waited for you to come back inside the house. “Say goodnight to Mr. Jeon, sweetheart” he tells you. You look back to Jungkook and place a gentle hand on his cheek. “Goodnight” you say sweetly to him. He smiles down at you and says the same thing. After watching you walk through the doors of your house Jungkook looks at your dad. “Goodnight, sir.” He walks away and gets into his car. 

Later that night your phone starts to buzz with an incoming call. Picking up the phone you read the name. ‘Jungkook’ pops up on the screen and you slide the answer button. “Hey, what are you doing up so late?” you ask him with a tired voice. “I could ask you the same thing; I wasn’t sure if you’d even answer.” His heartbeat picks up at the thought of you in bed with drowsy eyes and cute pajamas on. “I just wanted to check in to see how you were doing” you chuckled at him. Butterflies erupt in your stomach thinking about him caring this much about you.  

“I’m doing just fine Jungkook, stop worrying so much. How’s your hand?” you say. You couldn’t help but think about what happened after you left the courtyard. Did he fight someone? 

“It’s been better”  

“What happened back there? Did you punch someone?” You ask, curious to know what had gone on. He sighs over the phone. He takes a deep breath before answering you. “Look, don’t worry about it alright? Knowing that your fine is enough for right now.”  

He looks up at the clock on his dresser and reads the time. It’s getting late and he feels bad for keeping you up at such an hour. “You should head to bed, it’s getting late.” Nodding your head, you agree with him. “You’re right, goodnight Jungkook.” 

“Before you go” he says and takes a moment to collect his thoughts and come up with something to say.  

“Um do you wanna, maybe, go out with me tomorrow?” He waits for you to answer. 

“I don’t think I can.” you tell him. His mood completely drops. His shoulders deflate as he tries to think of what to say next.  

“Oh”  

It’s silent for a moment. 

“Do you have something already planned for tomorrow or” he stops 

“I can’t date” you say softly, smiling even though he can’t see you.  

“I see” he says lost in thought.  

“Uh, you better get to sleep. I'm sorry for keeping you up” 

You laugh lightly. “Goodnight, Jungkook” you say for the last time.  

“Goodnight, sweetheart” 

~  Jungkook has tried his hardest to build up the courage to talk to your parents and get their blessing. He’s been spending a lot more time with you lately. Meeting you after school and walking to the garden together. Jungkook also, hasn’t built up the courage to confess how he feels about you.  

It’s driving him absolutely insane. But there was no way you hadn’t noticed it by now. He was so obvious. He always called you by petnames or he was always being touchy with you.  

One of the days he spent with you in the garden he brought a blanket and some food. Walking over to your usual meet up spot he sees you already sitting on the bench. Looking up at the leaves as they slowly fall. It was nearing the end of summer and fall was beginning to show itself.  

He couldn’t help but look at the way you sat there. Looking so effortlessly beautiful, you took his breath away. Walking up to you, you look up to see him with a bag and a basket clad in his hands. Your face lights up at the sight of him.  

Jungkook made you feel things you’ve never felt before, almost like you were sitting by a fireplace on a warm winter night, or cuddling in your blanket when the weather is rainy and gloomy outside. When he enters a room, your whole world completely lights up.  

The same goes for him. He can’t stop thinking about you whether it’s day or night. It’s every hour of the day that you occupy his mind. He’s so deeply infatuated with you it almost makes him sick with love.  

“Hi, baby,” he says. The petname makes your heart stop beating for a minute. You smile up at him and greet him back. “Hi,” you say with a sweet voice. He bends down to kiss your forehead and places the things down on the floor.  

Sneaking around behind your parents’ backs didn’t feel good but risking it all for him was worth it. “I brought a blanket and some food for us.” You giggle at his thoughtfulness. “Hmm, is today a special day or what?” you ask him. Feeling giddy as ever. “Nothing special, just felt like doing it” he shrugs his shoulders as he sets everything up.  

Moving down to the blanket laid over the grass you straighten out your white skirt and sit down. He sets the basket up next. Laying the food out for you, when he’s done, he moves to sit behind you and moves you, so you’re settled between his legs. Jungkook wraps his arms around your waist, kisses your temple, and simply breathes in the air around you.  

Sinking into his touch, you feel like you’re on clouds. The feeling he sets in you is magical. You so badly want to lay your lips on his soft ones, the thought of it makes your heart do flips. Jungkook could easily be the best thing that’s ever happened to you.  

~ 

Today was the day. The day that Jeon Jungkook finally found the courage to ask your parents for their blessing. He's scared shitless of what their answer could be. He’s praying that he gets a positive answer from them so he can finally give you something that you deserve. Taking a deep breath, he reaches the front of your gate once again.  

You were out today; you had told him you wanted to explore more of the town and spend some time with Mrs. Kim. He found this the perfect opportunity to come to your house and ask what he’s been dying to ask. He knocks on the gate to get your father’s attention. When the gate opens he’s met with your father and mother.  

Eyes flickering up and down at the boy. His heart is racing. Remembering what he was here for, he clears his throat and says, “Mr. and Mrs. __, I’d like to ask your permission to take your daughter out. I know she’s not allowed to date. But she deserves to be treated with the utmost respect and shown the love that she’s always desired for” he waits patiently for their response.  

They turn their heads to each other and close the gate. A strong rush of dissapointment washes over him as he starts to make his way back to his car. Heartbeat picking up he hears the rustling of the gate reopening and he hears your father yell for his name. “Mr. Jeon.”  

Jungkook turns his body so he’s facing your parents. “Yes, sir,” he says in a strong voice. “We will let you take our daughter out, only if you promise us you will never hurt her. And promise her you will fulfill her needs.” Elated, is what Jungkook feels. He feels like he’s on top of the world right now. A smile appears on his lips and falls to his knees and bows down to them. Not caring that his clothes are getting dirty.  

“I promise you both, I will take care of her.” he says.  

~ 

It’s the next day, you sat in Jungkook’s car still in disbelief that he got your parent’s blessing. “I can’t believe you did that for me” you look over at him with a fond smile. He places his hand over yours and brings it to his lips. “Baby, you don’t understand how long it took me to bring myself to them. I practically begged them.” he chuckles.  He pulled a bag out from behind your seat.

"What is it?"

"Open it up and see" he smiles

When you open the bag you see a pastel blue cardigan with butterflies and flowers decorating the hem of it.

"Oh, Jungkook you didn't have to"

"But I wanted to. I saw it and thought it'd look pretty on you" too shy to look at you he looks down at his lap and played with his hands

He planned out the perfect day for you. He couldn’t wait to spend it with you.  

Getting out of the car Jungkook made reservations for a restaurant that was way out of his budget. He had a little help from his mom and made sure to pay her back every cent. He holds your hand in his and guides you to your table. Pulling your chair out, he takes his own seat and scans over the menu. 

“Anything catch your eye? Order whatever you want” he tells you.  

Lips curling at the corners of your mouth you read through the different selections.  

~  Dinner was amazing. The waiter came to pick up your plates and Jungkook took you to an empty parking lot. “What are we doing?” Looking around and see no one in sight. “You said you wanted a tattoo, right?” From the front compartment of his car, he pulls out the fake tattoos you used to use when you were little. From the corner of his eye, he sees the biggest smile grow on your face.  

“Which one do you want?” scanning through the different types of tattoos.  

“Pick one for me” you tell him.  

He picked a cherry. Looking up at you he sees stars twinkle in your eyes as you look at him. “Where do you want it?” You pull down the neck of your sweater and show a bit of your chest. Right above your heart. Jungkook tears the tattoo out and gets a towel that was lying in his car and a water bottle. He dabs it over the tattoo where he placed it on over your heart. Pulling the paper back the print of the cherry is laying on your skin.  

He rubs his finger over it gently and looks at you. Averting your gaze, you start to feel nervous. Only Jungkook can make you feel like this.  

~  Jungkook wouldn’t tell you your next destination. He told you it would be quite a drive. So, you laid your head back and took a small nap. Jungkook placed his hand over your thigh and drove you to wherever he was taking you.  

It wasn’t until you opened your eyes; you saw a big white arch away. It was surrounded by cherry blossom trees. Jungkook looks over at your face. Smiling the biggest smile, you unbuckle your seatbelt and open the car door. Running up to the entrance you jump up and down giggling.  

Jungkook walking slowly with his hands in his pocket he watches you.  

“Oh my God! Oh my God! There’s so pretty!” you almost feel tears start to build up in your eyes. You can’t believe Jungkook drove all this way. He walks up next to you and tangles his hand in yours. “You wanna go see it?” he says, lips turned up into a smile. Nodding your head eagerly, you practically drag him over.  

Slowing down your pace you look around at the beautiful trees. The white and pinkish leaves fall into your hair. There’s a bridge that you stop at. In the middle of it, Jungkook places a hand on your cheek and turns your attention to him. You look up at him with those eyes. Eyes that he absolutely adores. He says your name softly and pulls you closer to you. “Do you like it? I tried so hard looking for them.” he tells you.  

“Jungkook, this is like, a dream come true. I can’t believe you did this, thank you so much.” You pull him in for a hug and dig your face into his neck. His hold around you tight as he closes his eyes and soaks in the moment.  

When you pull away your faces are close, lips to point they’re basically touching. He cups your cheeks with his hand and says, “I need to tell you something” you hum in response. He takes a deep breath in and finally spits out what he’s been holding in for a while.  

“I love you” your heart stops.  

You look into his eyes and scan his face. Looking at the little mole under his lip. And the scar that grazes his upper cheek. 

“Can I kiss you?” you ask him  

He only nods and slowly pulls your face closer to his. Noses brushing softly against each other. Your lips graze each other softly. Then, he slots them together. Connecting them. You feel a rush of blood go to your head. Your cheeks are warm and flushed with red. The sounds around you are the streaming water beneath your feet, the rustling wind against the leaves. And birds chirping in the trees.  

The leaves are falling on top of you. This moment couldn’t be any more perfect.  

~ 

On the drive home Jungkook held your hand the whole way there. Music played softly in the background and the windows rolled down to let in a gentle breeze.  

When you arrive at the gate of your house, he parks his car in the same spot that he does every time he visits. Walking up to the front your hand is warm in his. You stop and turn to him. “So, what does that make us?” you ask smiling up at him.  

“Well, I thought it was kinda obvious. You just want me to say it, huh?” He laughs at you. Nodding your head, you wait for him to say what you want to hear. “That makes you my girlfriend” he wraps his arms around your neck and gives your nose a little peck. You scrunch up your nose smile. You’ve been smiling the whole day your face is starting to hurt.  

“Then you’re my boyfriend” you giggle. He leans in and places his lips on yours. He smiles into the kiss, and you can feel it against your lips. The gate opens and reveals your father. Who has been waiting for you to come home. “Oh, hi dad” you say. “Honey, why don’t you come inside. It’s getting late and it’s cold” You sigh and turn back to Jungkook.  

“Bye” you place a peck on his lips. “Goodnight, baby.” he says and looks up at your father and walks back to his car. Once you’re on the other side of the gate your dad stops you for a moment. “Have you told him?” Smile dropping you look down to the floor.  

“Not yet” 

“Don’t make this harder for him or for yourself sweetheart” 

“I love him dad and he love me. I’ll get there eventually” 

~  At school, you’re walking hand in hand with your boyfriend. Walking past his (ex) friends, they all have their eyes on you. Sooha has an irritated look on her face. But walking past them made you feel more confident in yourself. Being with Jungkook like this made you confident.  

Walking into the library you and Jungkook take a seat by the window and just sit in comfortable silence. Your legs are over his on the small couch and you’re reading your books about cherry blossoms again. That day that he took you to see the cherry blossoms, he had kept a pedal that fell from the tree and kept it in a glass container. It’s a day he’ll never forget. It’s the day he got to tell his lover that he loved her and made her his. He’s so eternally grateful to whatever god that sent you to him.  

He was on his phone when he suddenly broke the silence.  

“Baby?” He calls for your attention.  

You hum in response, and he continues. “You wanna come over after school today? My mom said she wanted to meet you. You don’t have to if you're not ready or comfortable yet though. I was just suggesting” he says it as the words spill out of his mouth faster than you can comprehend.  

You laugh at his cuteness. Thinking over about how meeting his mom would go. It would be lovely if you got to meet the person that made Jungkook the person he is today.  

“Yeah, sure. That’d be great. Just tell me what time and I’ll be there.” you say softly. A wave of relief washes over him. He was worried you’d be too scared to reject him. “Alright” he pauses for a moment. “Okay, I’ll pick you up at six then?” Your lips curl up, delighted to finally meet his family. You nod your head in response and continue with your book. 

Jungkook places his hand over your thigh and looks down at his phone again.  

~  Looking at yourself in the mirror, you fix your hair one last time and touch up your makeup. You wanted to make yourself presentable in front of Jungkook’s mom. It’s not that you were scared of meeting her, you scared of what she might think of you. Straighten out your dress one last time your thoughts are broken by the doorbell ringing.  

When you leave your room you see your mom answer the door. “Oh hi, Jungkook are you here to pick up ___?” Letting him in he walks past her and waits by the door for you. “Yeah, we're going back to my place. We're just gonna eat dinner there.” He explains. “Ah okay, well have fun. I’ll go grab her and tell her you’re here” she says. Before she can move, you emerge from the corner of your room and Jungkook sets his eyes on you. He smiles at you and pulls you in by your waist to hug you. “Hi, baby,” he says, feeling giddy at the thought of you. Telling your mom goodnight and that you’ll be back soon; Jungkook guides you with a hand on your back towards his car. He opens the door for you like the gentleman he is and walks around the car to get into the driver’s seat.  

When you stop at a red light the silence between you two is broken by him. “How are you feeling?” he asks you. To be completely honest you were scared shitless. Afraid of what she might think of you. Afraid that she thinks you’re not enough for her son. Afraid that you’ll give off the wrong impression. Jungkook cuts off your thoughts by placing a kiss on your wrist.  

“Baby?”  

Coming back to reality you giggle softly. “Sorry, um.” You take a moment to collect your thoughts. “To be honest with you. I’m terrified.” You speak about your insecurities. Thinking about meeting his mother. You know you fully agreed to this earlier. But the drive to his house has become surreal to you now.  

“She’ll love you I promise. But no matter what, if she doesn’t like you; know that I love you okay? Never forget that.” Calming your mind down, you nod your head and settle in silence for the rest of the car ride.  

~ 

Jungkook walks around the car again to open your door. You thank him and look at his house. It wasn’t too big, but it wasn’t too small. It was the perfect size. Walking up to the front door, he unlocks it, and your heart picks up once again. You walk through the door and investigate the living room.  

His little brother is sitting on the couch watching TV. His youngest sister was sitting on the floor watching whatever her brother was. Jungkook was the eldest out of the three. His siblings being much younger. You walk into the living room and Jungkook yells out to his siblings. “Guys, turn off the TV for a minute. I want you to meet someone.”  

They both turn to look at you and you smile down at them. “This is my girlfriend, ___. This is Jungwoo and Jungha.” Cute. All of their names start the same way, you think. Jungha walks up to you. She seems to only be around four years-old and Jungwoo looks to be about seven. “It’s nice to meet you both” you softly smile at them.  

Jungha tugs on your sleeve and looks up at you. “Are you a princess?” she asks. Your heart melts at the sweet little voice. “She’s not a princess! She’s not wearing a crown!” Jungwoo exclaims from where he sat. You giggle at them, and then you hear footsteps come up from behind you.  

Turning around you see Jungkook’s mother. You’re a nervous wreck when you first see her face. You politely bow to her and greet her.  

“It’s nice to finally meet you Mrs. Jeon”  

“Oh, honey please stand up.” She motions for you to stand straight 

“No need for formalities, I hope you’re hungry. I made a lot of food tonight!” She smiles at you and walks back to the kitchen.  

Okay, this isn’t going as badly as you thought it’d go. You walk back to the living room with Jungkook to chat some more with his siblings. You sit down on the floor and Jungkook sits behind you on the couch. “So, Jungha. How old are you?” you ask the little girl.  

She looks up from her toys and holds up four fingers in front of your face “I’m four!” Her small voice makes your chest ache from how cute she is. She goes back to her dolls and plays with them again. You turn your attention to Jungwoo and start a conversation with him.  

“What about you Jungwoo?” you ask him. “I turned eight last month” You were only off by a year. This time he asks you a question. “Why are you with my brother? He’s annoying and he never lets me in his room” he pouts with his arms crossed over his chest.  

“Well, I think Jungkook is amazing. You should cut him some slack. I’m sure he’s a great brother!” you tell him. Jungkook leans down and kisses the crown of your head as he looks at the TV. Your arms are laid in your lap and his are wrapped around your neck.  

“Yeah, cut me some slack. I try my best!” he says to his younger brother.  

“I guess” Jungwoo rolls his eyes. You laugh at him and advert your eyes to the youngest one in the room again. She looks up at you and places a doll in your lap. “Will you play with me? You can be the princess!”  

You happily oblige and play with her until dinner is ready.  

~ 

At the table, Jungkook’s mother places the food around it. “Wow, Mrs. Jeon this looks amazing. Thank you so much for having me over” you say to her. She smiles back at her as she puts food on the little ones’ plates. “It’s no problem sweetie. Now please tell me more about yourself! All I hear from Jungkook is ‘my girlfriend is amazing’ and ‘I can’t wait for you to meet her’." She giggles. Hearing this makes your heart swoon. He talks about you like that?  

“Well, um. I’m new to town. My parents and I moved here just this summer.” you say.  

“Oh! How exciting! Where did you move from?”  

“Seoul, my parents wanted to get away from the city and thought it was better to move to some place smaller.” Talking about Seoul makes you miss it. Seoul is the place you grew up in. You didn’t have many friends over there, but you still managed to have some.  

“Well, Yongsan is small, but everyone knows everyone and it’s a great community all around.” She reassures you.  

Thinking back on your school experience you highly doubt that it’s great at all. You only smile at her. As the night goes on, embarrassing childhood stories about Jungkook may have slipped out here and there. Spending your time with them was refreshing. You adored his family. This is something you wished for in the future.  

On the way back to your house the car is silent. You think back to the events of tonight and reminisce.  

“So, how do you feel now?” Jungkook says 

“I feel content with tonight. I love your family. They’re so adorable. I wish I could come over a lot more often.” you say with a small smile on your lips.  

“Well, you can. Come over as much as you want, baby” He looks over at you and you nod. Your smile slightly fading.  

~ 

At the garden, Jungkook told you to meet him there after school. He told you he had a surprise. On your way over you pass by Sooha. Not caring about the way, she looked at you, you make your way over to your lover. He stood over the magnolia tree with a cover over the bench.  

Eyebrows furrowed you walk over to him and hug him. You tilt your head so you’re now looking up at him. He places his soft lips against yours and pulls something out of his bag.  

It’s the cherry blossom pedal that he kept from the day that he took you to go see them. You gasp, looking at what occupied his hand. “What is this?” you question. “It’s a pedal from the cherry blossoms I took you to see.” Those butterflies in your stomach bloom from within once again. You feel like the luckiest girl in the world to have such an amazing boyfriend.  

Jungkook has given you love that you’ve never experienced before. You want to thank whoever sent him to you forever. Grabbing the pedal, you hold it close to your chest. “Thank you honey,” you say under your breath and connect your lips together. Every touch of his lip is like a spark of electricity. You can never get enough of it.  

“I also did something else” He takes a hold of the cloth that was covering. On the bench, there’s a gold tag right in the middle. The engraving read ‘I love you for all eternity –J' you stand there, at a loss for words. He got this done for you? You start to feel tears burn at your waterline. Everyone in the world deserved a Jungkook. Wiping the tears from your eyes you rush into him and wrap your arms around his neck.  

“I can’t believe you did this” you muffle into his chest. He wraps his arms around your waist and digs his face into the crook of your neck.

“Do you like it?” looking down at you.  

“I fucking love it Jeon Jungkook” you laugh and kiss his lips again. This time the kiss lasts longer. Lips moving against each other with so much passion; moving slowly together. You’ve never been happier.  

~ 

Jungkook sat at his desk in his room and his mom walked through his door. “Honey?” She catches his attention. He hums in response.  

“I was cleaning out your room and I found this sitting on your dresser. I swear I wasn’t snooping but I was reading and” she pauses and opens it up. Jungkook wasn’t mad at her. He just sits and sighs as he waits for his mom to read what he wrote down.  

“It says study hard enough to get into college. Okay, reasonable, next one says read the encyclopedia of cherry blossom trees. The last one says, major in Botany? Since when were you into plants and nature?”

Jungkook walks up to her and rips the paper from her hand. “It’s a list I wrote up in the middle of the night the other day. ___ is my inspiration behind it.” He says with a fond smile.  

She’s never seen her son this happy and in love before. It’s truly the sweetest thing she’s ever seen. Such young love between the two. Her son’s happiness makes her a whole lot happier.  

~ 

One day, Jungkook gets a sudden call from you. He hasn’t been with you in the past few days due to you being away for some reason. He never questioned it, not wanting to push you to your limits. Over the phone you tell him that you needed to tell him something.  

You told him to meet you at your spot at around 8:00. It was usually dark by then and he was getting worried about you being there by yourself as you waited for him. When he pulls up next to the parking lot near the garden, he hurriedly makes his way over to you. You were sitting on the bench waiting for your boyfriend to show up.  

“Hey, baby, what’s going on? Are you okay?” he says in a soft voice. He takes your hand in his and pulls you closer to him. Jungkook looks at your face and notices your red puffy eyes. Have you been crying? Getting even more worried, he cups your cheeks, so your head is tilted towards him.  

“Hey, whatever it is we’ll get through it, alright? Please, tell me what the hell is going on” he weeps, Jungkook can feel his hands start to shake. Were you going to break up with him? Were you moving again? All these questions build up in Jungkook’s mind and he can’t stop thinking about the worst. Until it comes. You look down and a tear drops into your lap. The soft sniffles that come from you make his heart sink. He pulls you closer to him and you sob into his shoulders.  

“I should’ve told you this sooner” you say quietly 

“Tell me what, baby? What should you have told me?” He starts to panic. He’s completely clueless of what you’re trying to tell him. 

And then.  

It spills from your mouth.  

“I’m sick” Jungkook’s world stops to a halt.  

“Okay, let’s take you home and you’ll feel better”  

“No, Jungkook.” you pause 

“I’m sick”  

“No, you can’t be sick, y-you're perfect. That’s not possible.”  

You try to contain your tears, but they keep falling.  

“That’s why I haven’t seen you for the past few days. I was at the hospital for my checkup. I have a heart condition and it doesn’t allow my blood to flow correctly and it restricts me from doing a lot of things. I’ve had it since I was ten. This means I’d have to stay home and at the hospital a lot more.”  

Jungkook couldn’t hold it in anymore. He felt mad. He felt mad at the world. This couldn’t be happening 

“Why didn’t you tell me this before?” His voice raises an octive 

“Because! This!” you point your hand between the both of you.  

“Because we were doing so good. This was going so well. I didn’t want to tell you because it would ruin things.” You stand up from the bench. And turn your back on him. “I’m sorry” you say under your breath. You run in the direction of your house.  Jungkook doesn’t let his tears loose until he’s back in his car. He feels furious. Not at you but at the situation.  

“Fuck!” He punches his steering wheel and sobs into his hand. He’s never felt so helpless.  

~ 

Jungkook needed time to think about what had just happened in the last few hours. How could you not have told him sooner? He feels guilty for not knowing. He’s made you do so many things not knowing the risk he’s putting you in. He was out on a drive, no location in mind. He continued down the road mindlessly.  

He doesn’t realize where he’s at until he stops the car. He’s in front of the cherry blossom trees. Maybe being here was good for him. There was a store right next to the exhibition. They had everything cherry blossom related. He walks through the entrance of the store and scans around.  

There was a man standing behind the counter. He watches as the young boy walks through his store looking around. “Hey, you” he says. Jungkook turns his head to him and walks to the counter. “Are you looking for something?” Jungkook pauses and looks at the wall behind the man. There were pictures of cherry blossoms all over. He notices a plant behind him. He lifts his finger and points at and asks, “What is that?”. The man turns around and carries the plant to his counter. 

“This is a cherry blossom plant” Without hesitation Jungkook pulls his wallet out and makes an exchange with the man.  

On the way back to Yongsan, you were all that occupied Jungkook’s mind. He was worried like crazy about you. The thought of you sitting in bed not being able to do anything causes an ache in your chest. From now on, he promises that he’ll stay by your side for all eternity. He prays to the gods above to keep you down here with him until you grow old.  

He promises to take care of you until he can’t anymore. 

~ 

You’re sitting in your bed reading a book. The clouds have covered the sky, and the air is a bit cold. All your medication is set next to your bedside table. Jungkook drove all the way to your house after visiting the cherry blossom tree. He stood under the arch of your door and knocked on the door twice.  

You look up from your book and he walks over to you. The sight he sees is making his stomach turn. You don’t deserve to live your life like this. You were still so young. You had your whole life ahead of you. Jungkook sits at the edge of your bed and holds your hand. He brings it up to his lips and kisses the back of it. He leans in to kiss your forehead and then your nose.  

Leaning his forehead against yours he speaks in a quiet tone. “Hi, honey. How are you feeling?” Trying to keep the mood positive you smile at him and say, “I’m doing great how about you?” He knows when you’re lying. But he only laughs and response to your question. “I’m doing good, baby.” he pauses for a moment. “I, um, I bought you something.” You look at him curiously. “What did you get me?”  

You tug the blanket away from your lap and you sit up properly. Jungkook holds your hands and carefully pulls you up. He brings you over to your window that looks out to the garden in your backyard. You see a little plant growing from the soil.  

It was a cherry blossom tree.  

Your heart swells with love as you realize what he has done for you, once again. You turn your body to him to engulf him in a hug. Burying your face into his neck, his scent brings you such comfort. You wish you could keep that scent with you forever. You place your hands over his cheeks and lock your lips with his. “Thank you, for everything. I love you so much.” Pecking his lips again. You’ve never been so full of love in your life.  

~  Today’s weather matched perfectly with today’s events. Your doctor told you it would be best if you got out and took in some fresh air. You spent your time with Jungkook in the garden and talked for hours. He brought you so many snacks and a blanket like he did all those months ago. You sat cuddled in front of him as he rested his back against the bench. His head rested against yours as you spent your time talking about anything.  

Jungkook brings up your list again.  

“Are you ever gonna tell me about number one?” he says into your ear. You giggle as you think about it.  

“Alright, I guess I have to tell you" You playfully roll your eyes. Jungkook pinches your waist and you burst out laughing.  

“Okay! Okay! Do want to know or not!” you say 

“Fine, I’ll stop. So, tell me”  

“The very first thing I put on that list is for something I need to do after.” It becomes silent. Jungkook thinks for a moment, letting your words sink in.  

After? 

There shouldn’t be an after. Life wasn’t fair to you. That’s all Jungkook knew.  

“And what is that baby?” he pulls you closer to his chest. Afraid that you’d disappear if he didn’t hold you tight enough.  

“I want to become a butterfly. I want my wings to grow strong and healthy so I’m free. I want you to look for me. I’ll show you so many signs that I’m with you. Always.” You turn in his arms and place a delicate hand over his heart. Jungkook can’t help the stinging sensation he feels in the back of his eyes. He pulls you in for a soft kiss.  

Lips moving slowly against one another. He can’t imagine his life without you in it. He’s not ready to let you go.  

You entangle your fingers in his slightly curly hair. You kiss the corners of his mouth and then his nose. You look at the tiny mole just under his nose. Cute.  

“You know I love you, right?” you say to him. The tears that fall from his eyes fall to his chin. You reach up and wipe them away. He takes hold of your wrist and kisses your palm. 

You’re going to be alright.  

With him by your side.  

~ 

Jungkook was out in the yard of his house watching his siblings play as his mom was getting dinner ready. He hears a car approach his driveway. It’s Jimin. He stands up from the step to his front door and walks over to his car. Jimin closes the door, and he walks up to Jungkook.  

His little siblings yelling at each other in their own little world. Jimin walks past them and smiles. He looks up at Jungkook and pats him on the back. Jimin and Jungkook were always closer than he and Taehyung. They basically grew up together. “I heard about __, I’m sorry” He looks down at his shoes and places his hands in his pockets “It must’ve been hard hearing that” Jungkook scoffs. Knowing that he has, who knows how much time with you is literally tearing him up inside. “Yeah, I mean I’m trying to spend as much time with her as I can, you know. Being without her right now is just killing me,” he says in a low voice.  

“Look, she’s going to get better. Stop thinking about the worst, just enjoy what you have right now, and don’t think about what could happen or what could’ve been. She needs you right now and you need to be strong for her. She’d trying her best for you.” he says softly. Jimin was always that friend you could go to for anything. He was one of Jungkook’s comfort people.  

“You’re right. Yeah, sorry. This is just so much information for me to take in. I can’t lose her, man” With a heavy heart Jungkook tries his hardest to not break down. Especially in front of his siblings. They’ve grown attached to you after you’ve visited them so many times.  

They’re always asking for you or wondering how you’re doing. It’s the sweetest thing. Jimin ended up staying for dinner. He hadn’t been over since the fight with Taehyung. He’s just glad that he has his best friend back.  

~ 

Jungkook’s never been this worried in his life. He’s called you multiple times and has sent over a hundred texts in the last hour. You haven’t responded to him at all. He decided to make the drive to your house to see what was going on. When he got there, he could’ve sworn his heart stopped beating; there were ambulence trucks parked outside of your house. He rushed over to investigate what was going on.  

He saw your father sitting on the doorstep of the house, with his head in his hands, hanging low.  

“Jungkook” he says  

“What happened? Where is she? In a panicked voice Jungkook walks into your house and looks for you. You’re nowhere to be seen.  

“They took her to the hospital. She was outside watering the plants and she collapsed. They said her heart is in critical condition.” Jungkook storms out of the house and speeds his way to the hospital. No way in hell is he letting you stay by yourself right now.  

He speeds through traffic lights, not caring if he gets caught. He needs to see you, now.  

~  He pushes through people to get to the front desk. “Excuse me do you have ___ ___ here. She was admitted not too long ago” he frantically asks the lady. She types into her computer and searches for your name.  

“Yes, we do. She’s in room seven.”  

“Thank you”  

Slowing down his pace he scans through the different doors. Being here makes his stomach sick. You’re supposed to be in bed at home. With him. Not in a hospital with sick patients all over the place.  

When he finally finds your room, he looks through the small window of the door. Your eyes are closed. He walks through the door, slowly as he approaches your bed. Your skin is pale, and they have you hooked to an oxygen tank. Jungkook makes his way to the side of your bed, and he breaks down sobbing. His hands shake as he takes your hand into his. Your skin is cold. Not like how he’s used to; he brings it to his lips and tries to warm them up with his breath.  

The motion wakes you up. You crack your eyes open slowly and meet Jungkook’s gaze. You place your hands on top of Jungkook’s hair, comforting him. His eyes are puffy from how much he’s crying. He cried on the way to the hospital just thinking about your condition.  

“Hi, honey” your voice comes out week. You slightly furrow your eyebrows as you take in his features.  

“Why are you crying?” Your hand making its way down to his cheek to wipe away his tears. He laughs quietly and looks down at the bed.  

“I’m glad you’re doing okay. I should’ve brought you something, but I was in a hurry. I was so worried about you I wasn’t thinking properly.” he says with guilt laced in his voice. He should’ve been there with you.  

“Baby, stop beating yourself up, there’s nothing you could’ve done to prevent me from ending up in here. I’m okay. See?” you make silly moves, and this gets him to smile even bigger. He leans over to kiss your forehead.  

“Don’t scare me like that again, okay?”  

“I promise”  

~ 

Jungkook came to visit you every day. They still told you they needed to run some more tests on you to monitor your condition. Until then you were stuck in the small hospital bed. Jungkook would stop by before and after school until it became late into the night. He brought you snacks, plushies, some of your clothes, and stories that happened to him at school or about Jungha and Jungwoo.  

You missed them so much. You haven’t seen them in weeks and Jungkook tells you that they keep asking for you. He also told you they prayed that you would soon get better so you could play with them again. The thought makes your heart melt.  

Jungkook has never left your side since the day you got admitted. He waits day and night for you to come back home to him.  

The TV was playing as you read your book (that Jungkook brought you) and he sits in the chair next to you as he’s on a call with his siblings. His hand is placed over your thigh, and he rubs back and forth gently.  

“I wanna say hi to __” you here Jungha’s voice. You peek your head from the corner of the screen, and she screams loudly out of joy.  

“Hi Jungha” you say softly with a smile spread across your face. She lets go of the phone and all you see is the ceiling. In the background you can hear her running around giggling. Her little face appears on the screen again and she yells “Hi __! I miss you sooooo much. Please come back soon!”  

With a fond smile you look at her and say “I’ll try very hard to come back healthy for you sweetie. Make sure you listen to your mom and Jungkook while I’m away” you tell her.  

“I always do! I’m a big girl!”  

You laugh at her silly antics. Saying goodbye to her Jungkook hangs up the phone and looks at you. You return to your book and feel Jungkook’s stare on the side of your face.  

Laughing, you look at him with confusion on your face.  

“What?” you say softly.  

He takes several minutes before he speaks.  

“Marry me” 

This takes you completely off guard. He wants you to marry him? There’s a warmth that spreads across your chest as you try to comprehend what just came out of his mouth.  

“What?” it comes out as a whisper.  

“Marry me __” he says in all seriousness. He’s never been so sure of something until he met you. You were his everything. He wanted to spend his life with you.  

A small smile appears on your lips.  

“Okay” His heartbeat picks up at your answer. He’s never loved someone as much as he loved you. He had already asked for your parents' blessing, and they surprisingly agreed.  

He was finally able to spend the rest of forever with you.  

~  They finally discharged you for one day. Having to beg and beg for them to let you out, they finally gave in.  

Today was a cool spring day. The flowers are starting to bloom wildly, and the trees finally have their color back after the winter season. You and Jungkook planned everything over the course of two weeks. You wanted to have something small. The place you both chose was a little greenhouse chapel not too far from where you lived.  

Your mother helped with your makeup and hair. The dress you wore was hers. It was an off the shoulder plain dress. You didn’t want anything too fancy, but nothing too little. It was perfect.  

As you wait to walk down the aisle you see everyone sitting in their seats. Mrs. Kim was sitting with her husband near the front where the altar was. Jimin was sitting with Jungha and Junwoo with their mother. Your father had his armed hooked with yours as he waited to walk you down the aisle. The bouquet of flowers clads in your hand you hear the music begin to play. The song ’Try Again’ starts to play in a ballad.  

At the end of the aisle, you see Jungkook. His hair is long enough to touch his eyebrows and his hands are crossed over his front. He can hear his heartbeat in his ears as he sees you standing there. You looked gorgeous in your dress. Walking down the aisle you see Jungha and Junwoo peek behind the chairs as they see you. Jungha has a huge smile on her face as she finally gets to see you.  

You smile at both of them and turn your head back to your lover. Your dad places your hand into Jungkook’s and returns to his seat next to your mother. Jungkook had tears building up behind his eyes. He can’t believe he’s marrying the love of his life today.  

“You may now be seated as we begin the ceremony of these two” everybody takes their seats, and the room becomes quiet.  

“Now, let’s begin.” He clears his throat.  

You look over to Jungkook and he mouths the words ‘I love you’ and you mouth them back.  

“Do you Jungkook take ___ to be your wife?”  

“I do”  

“And do you ___ take Jungkook to be your husband.”  

“May I have the rings please” Jungwoo emerges from his seat and walks up to the two of you. The pastor bends down slightly to take them from his hand. “Thank you” he smiles at him.  

He cutely runs back to his seat and places his hands in his lap.  

“Repeat after me Jungkook. I Jungkook” 

“I Jungkook”  

“Take you ___, to be my wife” 

He repeats after him. He says the same thing to you. He gives each of you your rings and tells you to place them on one another’s finger.  

“I know pronounce you husband and wife; you may now kiss the bride”  

Jungkook pulls you in by your waist and kisses you deeply. You feel a smile spread across your face as you kiss your husband.  

This was the happiest day of your life.  

3 years later  

Jungkook was sitting under the magnolia tree you used to meet up at. He had a piece of paper and a pen in his hand.  He spent most of his days here thinking. His favorite time of the day is when he gets to spend his time at your spot talking to you. The pen hits the piece of paper he holds in his hand and he begins to write

My baby,  

It’s been a long year once again without you by my side. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about you. You're always on my mind, I’ve started classes and learned a lot of new things about flowers and nature. Now I see why you loved them so much. The tree outside of your house has grown a lot more. The pretty white leaves you loved so much are starting to show. I hope you're doing well. I miss you. I miss you so much it hurts. I wish every day that you would come back to me. I miss hearing your laugh, I miss your smile, I miss your beautiful face that lights any room you walk into, and most of all I miss hearing your beating heart next to mine

Jungha started school recently. She said that she would make you a painting whenever she felt sad, and I’d put it them next to my desk. I have a drawer full of them now. I told her that you would come in at night to check up on us and you’d plant kisses so light that she doesn’t feel them when she’s sleeping. She asks and talks about you a lot every day. Sometimes I run out of things to say to her. and just tell her that you’ll be back with us one day. But i can’t lie to her. I think she misses you as much as I do Jungwoo’s doing pretty well too. We’ve gotten closer these past few years. He misses you a whole lot too. We all do. Everyone is doing well; I hope you’re resting well now. Sometimes I dream that you're next to me. Telling me that everything is going to be okay.  

And I think it will be. Everything will be okay as long as you’re close to me.  

I love you, baby.  

Jungkook looks up and sees a beautiful bright blue butterfly land on top of the paper. It flies away and a smile spreads across his face 

Everything will be okay 

~

a/n: AHHH IM CRYING. gosh writing this was such a rollercoaster. the fluff was too much for me to handle 😣. i hope you guys enjoyed this one. this was my favorite to write bc it’s after my favorite movie!! i hope i didn’t make yall cry 😭. ughhh i love their story so much.

[oceaneyesinla]

Umemiya just lends himself so beautifully to my style of making characters all soft and squishy.

Umemiya x F!Reader

Divider by @/cafekitsune

You've got open access to every part of Furin High, thanks to being best friends with the leader. You wander the corridors uninterrupted, greeting everyone you pass with a wave and a smile. At this point, you're an honorary member of Bofurin; spending one too many nights patching up the various injuries they all sustain while protecting the town and giving them a scolding every time.

There's only one place you can't seem to get anywhere near, and that's the little plastic greenhouse at the very end of the rooftop, past all of Ume's planters full of vegetables. You're up on the rooftop all the time; helping Ume with his plants, hoping your heart eyes aren't too obvious as you watch him ramble about the ideal fertilizer mix for his tomatoes. You hang out with the others up there too - gossiping with Tsubaki while you paint each other's nails, or convincing the boys to spar with you. It's a little cruel, but it's so funny when one of them underestimates you, or tries to go easy on you because you're a girl - only to get their ass handed to them.

That one little greenhouse, though, is locked down tighter than a bank vault. The boys have got a sixth sense for when you might be straying even a little too close for their liking. Some of them are more ... subtle in their distraction techniques than others. Kiryu and Suo especially have perfected the art of luring you away - engaging you in conversation so artfully that it's only an hour later that you realise you got a little too close to the greenhouse.

Sakura and Sugishita have never been within a mile of the concept of subtlety, but their efforts are so earnest you allow them to tug you away with muttered excuses of needing you elsewhere.

It seems to be some mutual agreement between every single member of Furin, and you have to admire their single-minded determination. You're not even mad; you figure Ume will tell you what's in there at some point. It's probably some kind of special turnip, or a new variety of lettuce that he's heard is particularly good for barbeques.

*************

Ume <3 16:43: Meet me on the rooftop at 20:00 Ume <3 16:43: I'll walk you home after, don't worry

It's adorable that he still feels the need to clarify that, as if he ever does anything different. It's a routine, one you cherish. You hang out at the school or at Cafe Pothos, or at a local restaurant, then once you're done, he walks you back to your house; waiting patiently at the end of the path until you shut the front door behind you.

If you spend an hour and a half trying to decide on an outfit, that's between you and your mirror. You decide on something comfortable but cute; after all, you have no idea what Ume's planning. Some little part of you is hoping for something romantic, but you try to push it down - you've been friends with Ume for years, and he's never once treated you as anything other than a trusted friend.

The rooftop door pushes open with a familiar creak, and you stifle a laugh when Ume flinches, turning to you with wide eyes as if he wasn't waiting for someone to open the door.

You're surprised when his eyes trail over your outfit, and even more surprised when a pretty red flush paints across his cheeks. He looks more flustered than you've ever seen him, and for his sake, you choose not to mention it.

"Why did you want to meet me, Ume?"

He steps closer, seemingly recovered from his little fright even though that blush remains on his cheeks. He leans in and you hold your breath as his lips brush against the skin of your cheek. His smile as he pulls away is nothing short of gorgeous, and you can feel heat rising in your face as you stare up at him.

"You look beautiful." His boyish grin remains in place as he takes your hand, giving it a little squeeze as he leads you, "I've got something I want to show you."

You can practically see his tail wagging as you walk across the rooftop, and you already know where he's taking you. You can't help but tease him, "I finally get to see what's in the mystery greenhouse, huh?"

The look he shoots you is adorable; like a kid caught with their hand in a cookie jar, and you can't stop the giggle that escapes you, "Everyone here has been keeping me away from that thing for weeks, Hajime. I thought Sugishita-kun was going to carry me away from it."

Ume lets out a laugh of his own, rubbing a hand over the back of his neck, "I guess they figured out what I was planning."

You tug on his hand, soft smile slipping onto your face as you meet his eye and speak in a low voice, not wanting to disturb the atmosphere building between you, "Come on. I want to see."

When you stand in front of the greenhouse, small but well-constructed, he gestures for you to push aside the plastic flap over the door. You do so, and what greets you has tears welling in your eyes.

Your favourite flower. You remember lamenting to Ume, once, about the difficulty in cultivating the delicate yet beautiful plant, and the love you had for its rich colour and pretty leaves. Now it was right in front of you, and your best friend grew it just for you.

He's shuffling by your side when you turn to him, looking more nervous than he has all night, and your voice is a little rough when you speak, "You grew my favourite flower."

"I did."

"This must have taken so much effort."

"It was worth it to see you smile." His smile is stunning and lovesick and you can see your own heart eyes reflected right back at you and suddenly, you're struck with the realisation that maybe you haven't been pining alone all this time.

His hand comes up to cradle your cheek and in a whisper, he asks, "Can I kiss you?"

Your voice fails you, so you nod instead, letting your eyes flutter closed as he leans in, pressing his lips to yours. They're a little chapped, but you don't care. His other hand moves to rest on your waist, and yours cling to the fabric of his shirt. The kiss is short, but you still feel breathless when you pull apart; awestruck and overflowing with love.

He's staring down at you like you hung every star in the sky, and he looks just as giddy as you feel. He leans down to kiss your forehead, hands resting securely on your waist, "Does this mean you'll be my girlfriend?"

"Yeah, I'll be your girlfriend, Hajime."

His laughter is relieved as he rests his forehead against yours, "It would have been awkward if you said no after all that."

"You really put in all that effort just for me?" Your voice is soft, meant only for the space between the two of you.

"There's no just if it's you." You're not sure he even realises the impact his words are having; speaking as casually as he ever does as if he's not speaking love into the world with every word, "Plus, I've been trying to think of a way to ask you out for months. I wanted it to be perfect."

This man - you know you'll find new ways to fall in love with him every day, "It is perfect. I love you, Hajime."

Your murmured confession makes his breath hitch, and when you meet his eyes, they're sparkling like the stars in the night sky enveloping you both. He meets your proclamation with one of his own, hushed and adoring. He leans in to kiss you again, and you know that this is love.

[cherienymphe]

Basic Training IV (Peter Parker x Reader)

Warnings: mentions of NON-CON, DUB-CON, mentions of MURDER, violence, kidnapping, captivity, public sex, degradation, mentions of forced pregnancy, mentions of forced marriage, stockholm syndrome, ptsd, housewife kink, cop!Peter

➥ banner by @vase-of-lilies​ | divider by @whimsicalrogers​

➥ series masterlist

summary: A pit stop during a road trip ends tragically when a small town cop sets his sights on you. You’re the newest addition in a long standing fucked up family tradition.

~

Jane was the one to greet you this time.

“You’ve been eating!”

She looked happy at that, smiling at you as she came to take the empty plate. You didn’t return it, mind wandering to Peter. He’d left days ago, and as thankful as you were for the solitude, you couldn’t help but worry. Once you’d started actually eating, it was like you couldn’t stop. Your body started craving food again, and it was then that you worried you might’ve been…tricked.

Peter said he was going to check on your mom, but how could you know that was true? After all, he was the reason you were even here, and he hadn’t done a single thing to show that you could trust him. In fact, all he’d shown you was the complete opposite. Everything that had happened showed you that you shouldn’t trust him…ever.

“Steve will be happy,” she continued, moving to unlock the bathroom. “You have a big day ahead of you, so you’ll want to scrub good.”

You frowned at that, following her into the bathroom.

“What do you mean?”

Were you leaving this room?

“You’ll be leaving this room today,” she answered your silent question. “You’ll be helping out in the garden with me and Sharon.”

Another woman, another name.

You repeated it to yourself, trying to keep count, and including yourself, that was five women. Which meant five men…at least, but then you thought about the day Peter had shown you Margaret, and there were men there you hadn’t even seen, so there was definitely more than five. The thought overwhelmed you, and you struggled to swallow.

Jane told you about what you’d be doing as you bathed, and when you were done, she had a dress laid out for you on the counter. You eyed it, hesitantly putting it on, confusion flowing through you. When you looked at Jane, it was the first time you noticed she was wearing a dress too. That’s all she’d been wearing, you realized, and so you didn’t question it.

Jane took your arm as she unlocked the door, and it hit you then that you were finally leaving this room. The thought had you shaking, and Jane rubbed your hand in what was probably meant to be a comforting gesture. As you glanced over your shoulder at the bedroom, she closed it, speaking.

“Normally, you’ll make sure the bed is made when you first wake up…”

Your eyes met hers as she continued.

“…then you’ll come downstairs and get started on breakfast, but seeing as it’s your first day, and you’re still adjusting, things will be a little different.”

You couldn’t stop frowning at her words, wracking your brain at all of this. You didn’t understand anything, and you looked around as she guided you down the hall. It didn’t take long to realize the house was large, and if you had to guess, this was more of a wing than a simple hallway. The thought was overwhelming, and again, you thought about what an escape attempt would even look like in a place like this.

Jane was talking to you as you walked down the stairs, your eyes roaming over pictures that lined the wall. Some were faces you recognized, like Steve and Margaret with a baby in her arms, and some you didn’t recognize, like a brunette man and woman with strawberry blonde hair. Still, it was all pictures of seemingly happy couples posing for the camera, and considering the reality behind the pictures, the sight made your stomach churn.

“We’re going to get you something in your stomach first, and then we’ll go to the greenhouse.”

She was leading you to what you assumed was the kitchen.

“I would’ve brought you food in bed, but…”

She trailed off, looking…worried.

“Steve feels like you’ve been adjusting long enough, and he wants to see you contributing right away, so…”

Steve.

He was clearly the mastermind behind whatever this was, and it only made you more wary of him. You looked around again, taking in the house, and you were surprised at how…nice it was. You didn’t know why, but for some reason, you were expecting some rundown house in the backwoods of this town. Considering how nice the room you’d been staying in was, you didn’t know why it didn’t occur to you that the house would be even more impressive.

The amount of money that went into this place hinted at the amount of money they had…and that terrified you.

The kitchen wasn’t empty when Jane guided you to it, and you blinked at the sight of two women, one of them familiar. You tried not to stare at Margaret, but it was hard. The first time you’d seen her, she’d been naked and was being brutally raped by her so called husband. You swallowed as her eyes met yours, a warm smile on her lips.

“This must be Y/N,” she said, and you were surprised by how…calm she sounded. “We’ve been dying to meet you.”

She pulled you into a hug before you could react, and you didn’t exactly hug her back, but she didn’t seem to care. The other woman in the room barely acknowledged you outside of a tight smile, more preoccupied with whatever she was cooking.

“I’m Margaret, but sometimes I’m referred to as Peggy,” she continued, and you nodded.

She glanced at the other woman, and seeming to get the hint, she turned to face you. You noted how pretty she was, but it was a cold kind of beautiful, the kind that made her seem equally terrifying. Her red hair spilled over her shoulders in pretty curls, and her green gaze was unwavering.

“Natasha,” she introduced herself.

You realized that this was Nat…Bucky’s wife. The same woman who had been down in that basement for almost four months, and you looked at her with a gaze that bordered along awe. You hadn’t even lasted a week, and you found yourself feeling incredibly…inferior at the moment.

“Y/N and I are going to be helping Sharon in the garden,” Jane told them as she started to fix you a plate of food. “Something small to get her into the swing of things until Peter comes back.”

Natasha snorted at that, but otherwise said nothing, and you curiously eyed her.

“He’s just off taking care of something for Steve, but he’ll be back in no time,” she told you, turning to you with a smile.

You wondered if that was what Peter told Steve, or if that was simply the message Steve conveyed. Again, you found yourself wondering who Peter was lying to. You or them? You gave her a tight smile in return, and she urged you to go in the hall, promising that she’d be right out. You hesitated at first, but eventually did, and you slowed when her hushed voice carried.

“We’re meant to be welcoming, Nat,” Jane told her.

“Welcoming,” the redhead scoffed. “Right.”

There was a brief silence before she continued.

“Steve wants her out and helping out because he likes being in control, but she’s not okay,” you heard her say. “She’s not ready.”

You heard her roughly put something into the oven just as Margaret spoke.

“Keep your voice down,” she quietly told her.

“He’s not here.”

“…but Tony and Stephen are,” Jane said. “Thor too. If Steve thinks she’s ready then she’s ready, and that’s that.”

Jane joined you moments later, a soft smile on her lips.

You didn’t mention the conversation you’d heard, and neither did she. After eating, Jane took you through the house, giving a brief tour along the way, and you were finding it hard to remember the layout. When Jane guided you through a side door, you were surprised to find it attached to what was obviously the greenhouse. You remembered seeing a few gardens in the backyard, and you frowned.

As if reading your mind, Jane spoke.

“You’ll be outside helping in the other gardens one day, but, for now…”

She didn’t need to finish the thought. They were afraid you’d make a run for it, and honestly, if you were outside, right now, you probably would. The thought of getting caught and thrown back down into the basement made you shudder though, and you winced.

“I know this is a lot,” she finally said after some time, looking at you with an honest expression for the first time since you woke up. “…but you’ll get used to it.”

You didn’t know why, but those words made your eyes water, and you looked away.

“Hey, hey,” she softly shushed, reaching for you. “It’s going to be okay.”

You shook your head, the tears spilling over, and Jane tried to quiet you.

Your chest grew tight, and the greenhouse felt smaller all of a sudden, like the walls were closing in. The idea that you would get used to this, that this nightmare wouldn’t even be that one day but instead something you saw as your normal life, it was too much. You thought about that picture of Margaret and Steve and their baby, and you wanted to be sick.

Jane was calling your name.

“Y/N, look at me,” she softly demanded. “You have to stop crying. You have to-.”

“What’s going on?”

You jumped at the new voice, and you froze, pressing your hand to your mouth just as Jane looked up. The fear in her eyes waned some, and you didn’t miss the way her entire demeanor softened. She swallowed, briefly glancing at you and rubbing your shoulder before lifting her gaze again.

“She’s still adjusting, Thor,” she slowly told him, gaze almost pleading. “She-she just needs a moment.”

She turned you around so you both were facing him, and she wrapped her arm around you, holding you close.

“Right?” she asked you.

You looked at her before looking at…Thor.

He was huge, and it wasn’t in an insulting way, but more so an observation about his build in comparison to Jane’s. His blond hair brushed his shoulder, and it was partially pulled back out of his face. He didn’t look real, blue eyes standing out so much, and you pressed your lips together as he eyed you. You didn’t know how to take him, but considering he was here with the rest and doing what everyone else was, you decided not to trust him.

You remembered that Jane had asked you a question, and you nodded.

“Use your words,” she whispered, squeezing your arm.

“Yes,” you quickly said. “I just got overwhelmed.”

Thor didn’t respond right away, and you were terrified of what he might do or say. It wasn’t lost on you though that Jane didn’t seem as scared as you. She was very much relaxed against you, and when Thor leaned in to press a kiss to her forehead, you surmised that this was her husband.

“It’s a lot, young Y/N, but with my beautiful Jane here, you’ll catch onto the flow of things quickly.”

You didn’t miss the way Jane smiled at him, and it left a bad taste in your mouth. When he looked at you, you froze under the weight of his gaze. His demeanor was friendly, and you definitely weren’t as nervous around him as you were with Steve, but outside of the obvious, there was something about him that unnerved you.

He tapped Jane’s chin before turning away, and it was only then did she exhale. She rubbed your arm again, assuring you that you were okay, before turning you back towards the plants.

You’d been helping out around the house for two days when Peter finally came back.

You didn’t know he was back, of course, in the kitchen with some of the other women and getting breakfast started. You were with Sharon, Natasha, and Pepper. You’d met Sharon in the greenhouse the other day, the blonde woman welcoming you with a small smile. You didn’t know how to take her, and she seemed to think the same of you.

Pepper seemed stern, like Natasha, but kinder. You’d messed up quite a few times over the morning, and as annoying as you knew it had to be, she hadn’t said a single negative word. It took you longer than you wanted to admit that you recognized her from the pictures on the wall, cuddled up next to a brunette man with a goatee. You eyed her strawberry blonde hair.

“Here,” she told you, handing you some cut potatoes. “Toss these into the pan.”

It wasn’t lost on you that they were giving you tasks that didn’t require some sort of sharp object, and it was almost flattering to think they thought you had that in you. You weren’t so sure. Sharon was chopping some more as you did as Pepper instructed, and it wasn’t long after that that you heard her exclaim. You looked over as she hissed, and you stilled at the sight of the blood on the counter.

The blonde was holding her hand under the sink with Natasha’s help, and you faintly recognized that Pepper was saying something to you.

You couldn’t take your eyes off of the blood, gaze roaming over it as crawled along the surface…the same way it had crawled away from Pietro’s body. You shakily reached out, grasping the counter, and you couldn’t make out anything in the room. All you could see was Pietro’s limp body sprawled along the pavement, and you sharply inhaled.

You blinked, eyes stinging, and you felt a hand on your arm.

You squeezed your eyes shut, shaking your head, but instead of darkness, you saw Wanda collapsing after Bucky had shot her. You saw how easily and quickly she’d died, and it was like you weren’t even in the kitchen anymore. You were running through the trees with MJ, her hand tightly clasped with yours…until it wasn’t.

Someone was calling your name, and you didn’t register why your knees were hurting until you opened your eyes to see that you were on the floor. You tried to stand, but you couldn’t, collapsing every time, and it took you way too long to realize what that loud wailing noise was.

It was you.

Your chest was hurting so much, and Pepper and Natasha were trying to shush you, but you couldn’t stop. Your vision was blurry from your tears, and you held your head in your hands. You were shaking so bad, and you slid down to the floor, forehead grazing the tile, and Pepper’s voice was in your ear.

“Y/N, you have to calm down,” she shakily told you. “What’s wrong? Tell me what’s wrong, so I can help you.”

“She needs to be quiet,” you heard Natasha say, her own voice sounding off. “…before…”

“What’s going on in here?”

You recognized that voice, and it only made you cry harder. None of them answered right away, too stumped by Steve’s presence, and the only sound for a few moments was that of your sobbing.

“She… We don’t know,” Pepper finally said, her hand on your back. “Sharon cut herself, and then she just… It triggered something, I guess.”

You could hear his heavy footsteps nearing you, and he sternly told Pepper to move. She did, and when Steve’s hand made contact with your arm, you screamed. You hadn’t meant to, the sharp sound escaping before you could stop yourself. You pushed yourself away from him, but with nowhere to go, you only pushed yourself against the cabinet. Your nails dug into Steve’s arms as he tried to grab you, and you were crying so hard you couldn’t catch your breath.

“Maybe you should get Peter,” you heard Natasha hesitantly suggest. “He just got back, didn’t he?”

You could only assume Steve took her suggestion because you didn’t feel him anymore. You pressed your hands to your mouth, trying to quiet yourself, but you couldn’t stop. You kept seeing their bodies over and over again, MJ’s face as she pushed you away. The blood on your hands…

You felt yourself tilting again, about to sink back down to the floor, when someone stopped you.

Hands were on your face, wiping your tears away, and a familiar voice was shushing you. Peter’s lips brushed your ear as he leaned in, and one of his hands slid to the back of your neck. He softly said your name, once, then twice, before telling you that you were okay. When he pulled away, he wiped your face again, and you peeled your eyes open.

Your gaze met his, and Peter tilted his head at you.

“You’re okay,” he gently told you, a small smile on his lips. “What’s wrong?”

“They’re dead,” you choked out. “They’re dead-they’re gone!”

“I know,” Peter said, pulling you against him. “I know.”

You could feel his hand on the back of your head, the other rubbing circles into your back. He shushed you, standing and forcing you to stand with him. He held your face in the crook of his neck, and you could faintly hear Steve’s voice as he said something. Peter said something back, but you couldn’t make it out.

You tripped over your own feet as he kept you against him, guiding you out of the kitchen. You almost collapsed again going up the stairs, but Peter kept you from falling. His fingers dug into your waist, and the other hand wrapped around your arm. You were too consumed by the memory of your friends’ murders to care about the close proximity, legs trembling and heart racing.

When he finally got you inside of your room, he didn’t stop you this time when you sank to the floor. Your forehead was pressed to your knees as you brought them up, and you wrapped your arms around your legs. You cried so much your head was starting to ache, and it was only when your sobs died down into soft sniffles did Peter speak again.

“I have something for you…something I think you’ll want to see…”

You slowly looked up at his words, remembering why he’d left to begin with. Peter was standing over the bed, reaching into a duffle bag, and you watched him pull out some pictures. Your lips parted as he neared you, and he knelt before you, handing you the pictures. With one look at them, your eyes watered again, but for an entirely different reason.

It was pictures of your mom checking her mailbox. She had a phone pressed to her ear, and you couldn’t stop flipping through them. You felt Peter wipe your face again as you did, your hands shaky, and more tears spilled over as you studied her face.

“She looks so sad,” you tearfully mumbled. “So worried.”

It was true. You could see it on her face, in her eyes, and it made your heart clench. You couldn’t imagine what she was going through, and you started crying again. It was interesting, because by anyone’s standards, you were in a far worse situation, but all you could think about was what it was doing to your mom.

Peter sat with you as you repeatedly flipped through the pictures, and you wiped your face.

“I’m never leaving…am I?” you asked after some time.

The words came out choppy, shaky, and you looked at him. You held his gaze as Peter reached out to brush away a stray tear, and he moved closer.

“No, pretty girl,” he whispered, shaking his head. “No.”

The pictures fell into your lap, and you dropped your face into our hands. Peter let you cry, and you didn’t know how to feel. You hated him, and how could you not? He was the reason you were even here. He’d wanted you, and so he took you, but then you’d think about Steve and how he punished Margaret, and just how mean he was…and you found yourself wanting to be grateful to be stuck with Peter.

…but you didn’t want to be stuck here, at all.

You felt Peter take the pictures, and you lifted your gaze.

“I didn’t tell Steve what I was really doing…”

You frowned at that, and you realized that Peter had lied to him. Not you.

“So…” he reached out, gently taking your chin as he held your gaze. “This will be our little secret, right?”

You faltered at that, frown deepening.

“If Steve finds out, I won’t be able to go and see her again.”

“I don’t want you to,” you whispered.

It was just as painful as it was exciting to see her and see how she was doing. You weren’t there, and you never would be again, and the thought made you so sad. It felt like you were just torturing yourself, and you shook your head.

“I can’t…” you trailed off, more tears spilling over. “She has no idea if I’m even alive, and I can’t see that.”

Your head drooped.

“I can’t watch her mourn me.”

Especially when you weren’t even dead, and that only made you think about MJ’s parents, Pietro and Wanda’s. They were in the same boat, you assumed, only their children were dead. You wondered what they did with their bodies, wondered if they at least let them be found so they could be buried or if they just… You looked away, more tears spilling over, and Peter pulled you against him when you started shaking.

You could feel your chest tightening again, and Peter pressed his face into your hair.

Sleep was hard to find.

You were on the floor again now that Peter was back, slipping out of the bed the second his breathing grew light. You’d been staring up at the ceiling for hours, thinking about your mom and your friends. It was too painful, but you couldn’t stop, replaying the memories in your head and thinking about how much your mom had seemed to age in such a short time.

It made you want to cry again, and you pushed back the tears, sitting up.

You felt almost…pitiful. All you’d done was cry and mope and lose your mind at the sight of blood. You thought about Natasha, finally putting a face to the name of the woman who’d lasted almost four months down in that basement, and you hadn’t even lasted a week.

You peered over the bed, looking at Peter as he slept.

Yes, he’d done a nice thing, and no, he wasn’t Steve, but that didn’t mean anything in the grand scheme of things. Peter could let you go, and he wouldn’t, because no matter how he may have felt about Steve’s methods, he wanted you here. You were here because he wanted you here, and you slowly stood. You knew the door would be locked, but you tried anyway, and you weren’t proven wrong.

You tried to think of where Peter kept the key, and you bit your lip.

Searching for it without turning on a light was nearly impossible. You didn’t think Peter would be stupid enough to just leave it in either of the nightstand drawers, but you were shocked to find them locked anyway. A few tears escaped, and you pressed your lips together. The closet door was always locked at night too, and you pressed your hands to your eyes, swallowing down a sob.

You were just about to try the door again when Peter’s voice startled you.

“What are you looking for?”

You jumped, hand tightening on the knob as you pressed yourself closer to the door. You didn’t say anything, and light soon flooded the room as Peter turned on the lamp. You kept your gaze on the wood, afraid to look at him, and you shuddered when you heard him push himself to his feet. You pressed our forehead against the door, and you flinched when Peter touched your arm.

“Do you want to be sent to the basement?”

Peter’s voice was low, but you heard home, nonetheless, shaking your head.

“Do you want…do you want Steve to tell me to drag you outside, tie you up to a tree and-.”

“No, no,” you choked out, shaking your head. “No.”

“Well, that’s what’s going to happen if he catches you trying to escape…”

You squeezed your eyes shut.

“That’s what would happen if I weren’t a better man, and I told him that I caught you trying-.”

“I’m sorry!”

Tears spilled over.

“Do you know how much I had to convince Steve to let you stay up here after what happened yesterday? He wanted to make an example out of you,” Peter whispered, his fingers grazing your arm. “He wanted to throw you down in that basement for a month.”

Your stomach turned at the thought, and you couldn’t stop crying. You felt Peter take your arm, slowly pulling you to him, and he backed up until he was sitting on the bed, taking you with him. Your head drooped, eyes on your lap, and Peter wiped your cheek.

“Things could be so much worse for you,” he whispered, leaning in, lips grazing your cheek. “I’m trying to help, but you have to help me.”

You sniffed, and Peter straightened the sleeve of your nightgown.

“Help me help you.”

You pressed your hands to your mouth, trying to stifle your sobs, and Peter stroked your face, playing with your hair.

“Okay…?”

You sniffed again, briefly closing your eyes, and you gave him a hesitant nod. Peter sighed, and you felt his hand drift, tracing circles into your back.

“How about this…”

He moved closer.

“You sleep up here, tonight, because now I feel like I can’t trust you.”

“No, I-.”

“Sleep up here with me…and I won’t tell Steve about what you tried to do.”

You froze at his words, blinking, and you looked away. The thought of sleeping next to Peter made you want to be sick, but at the same time, the thought of Steve finding out that you’d tried to escape made you want to die. It made your blood run cold, heart dropping to your stomach, and you slowly looked at Peter.

His brown eyes were warm, no hint of anger in them, and he reached up, gently grazing your jaw with his fingers.

“What do you say, pretty girl…?”

You looked down, heart threatening to leap from your chest, and against what you wanted, you gave him a shaky nod. Peter softly urged you to your feed, gently taking your hand. You couldn’t stop crying, silent as tears spilled over, and Peter shushed you, tucking you in. He sat on the edge, hovering over you with one hand pressed into the bed on either side of you.

His dark brown hair kissed his forehead, and the smile he gave you was meant to be reassuring you guessed.

“This will be our little secret, okay?”

You held Peter’s gaze for a while, playing with the comforter. You wanted to trust that he wouldn’t tell Steve, and even though you didn’t, at least not fully, you also didn’t have a choice. Sleeping next to Peter for one night was nothing in comparison to however Steve would want to make an example out of you.

“Okay,” you quietly agreed.

His smile widened at that, and you remained still as he stood. Peter walked to his side of the bed, the room bathing in darkness before he joined you. He didn’t move closer nor even reach out for you. He stayed on his side as he sought sleep once again, and against what you wanted, your body started to do the same.

[joelalorian]

Petals of Affection - Part III

A floral mystery in three parts, featuring Jackson!Joel x f!reader

Summary: A secret admirer gifts you a different flower and a riddle ten times before you put the clues together and discover that he's been right in front of your face the whole time.

Written for @morallyinept's Flora & Fauna challenge. Please check out all the wonderful works created in Jett's honor!

Word count: 3,049

Warnings: 18+ MDNI, fluff, kissing, f!oral, unprotected p in v (it's 20 years into the fucking apocalypse), it's not stated, but I envision Joel having been snipped pre-outbreak, terms of endearment. POV flops around like petals in the wind. Reader has no established age or physical description aside from having hair that gets frizzy with humidity and often dirt-covered hands, because greenhouses, ya know? No use of y/n, none whatsoever.

Dividers courtesy of the wonderful @saradika-graphics. Gif chosen because of the wonderful floral wallpaper ;)

And this sweet little love story has come to an end. Thank you all for coming along for the ride! Your comments, likes, and reblogs are appreciated more than I could ever say.

Part I | Part II | Masterlist

Jasmine Orchid Eustoma Lavender Magnolia Iris Lily Lilac Eucalyptus Rose

JOEL MILLER

Joyful moments shared; the answer lies in the air.

Overwhelmed by your grace, the answer hides in this place.

Endless thoughts of you, the answer is in the view.

Lost in your scent, the answer is present.

Moments with you, the answer rings true.

In your eyes, the answer lies.

Lost in your beauty, the answer is a duty.

Longing for your touch, the answer means so much.

Evergreen thoughts of you, the answer is in the dew.

Remember my love for you, the answer is in you.

JOEL MILLER!

Maria’s eyes roved over your scribbled notes, a broad smile slowly spreading across her face at the underline beneath Joel’s name. “Took you long enough. I was beginning to question your intelligence, girl!”

Heat warmed your cheeks as you laughed, though you weren’t sure if it was due to embarrassment or the wine. “The answer was right in front of my face this whole time, I just couldn’t see it.”

Flopping back on the couch, you felt a bit overwhelmed. Ducking your head between your knees as you leant forward, you sucked in a few deep breaths before baring your soul to your best friend. “I wanted it to be him. I longed for it to be him. But I didn’t dare to hope that it would be him. Do you know what I mean?”

“I do.” Maria’s voice held nothing but understanding. “Hope could lead to despair if not met.”

“Exactly!” you exclaimed, poking your head up to meet her dark eyes. “I couldn’t handle the despair, so I couldn’t dare to hope.”

Maria settled onto the soft cushion next to you, one arm reaching out to rub your back soothingly. “You have nothing to fear now. Joel did all this, for you.” Her free hand gestured at the flowers and notes scattered across the table. “His feelings for you are so deep, so true, that he came up with this elaborate plan to show you instead of just telling you, like any normal person would.”

Pausing, Maria waited until you met her gaze again with a watery smile, wanting to make sure you understood the point she was making. Her eyes earnest and smile broad, she added, “He was afraid to hope, too. But he did and look what has come of it.”

Tears built up, threatening to spill over as you absorbed everything. Joel loved you, just as you loved him, his grand gesture proving it beyond a shadow of a doubt. He dared to hope when you didn’t and thank goodness he did. You two would still be dancing around each other for who the fuck knows how long otherwise.

You stood suddenly, feeling revived and eager to see Joel at once. “I need to see Joel. I need to tell him I feel the same way.”

“Well let’s go then! He’s probably at my house with Tommy.” Maria led the way out of your house after you both scrambled to put shoes on, marching with purpose down the quiet road under the cover of a clear, starry sky.

Despite the late hour, you needed to see Joel, to return his declaration of love now that he bared his heart and soul to you in such a clever, romantic way. Crisp air filling your lungs as you walked, you felt the effects of the wine wear off. You never felt so clear-headed, so full of promise, so full of love.

“Do you know what you’re going to say to him?” Maria asked as you neared her house. Bright lights shining through the curtains showcased the shadowy movements inside of the two men inside.

“Not a clue,” you admitted, suddenly nervous. “My brain hasn’t gotten that far yet. Fuck! What am I gonna say?”

“Well, you could always just walk in and kiss him. Just lay a big wet one right on his lips,” Maria suggested, the nearly full moon reflecting mischievously in her dark brown eyes. As your mouth dropped open, she added, “Yes! That’s exactly what you should do!”

“Well, in the absence of anything better…”

Laughter still bubbled from your bellies as you followed Maria up the front steps and into her home. Nearing sensory overload, every cell of your body vibrated with the burning need to lay eyes, hands, lips on Joel.

“Is that you, honey?” Tommy called from the living room. The two of you turned the corner into the room, and Maria made a beeline right to her husband.

Ignoring the married couple, your attention focused on the other occupant of the room. Joel sat on the couch, leant back in a relaxed pose, one arm slung across the back cushions. His thick thighs spread wide, just begging for you to step between them.

Wide and unblinking, his burnt umber eyes watched as you stepped further into the room. Head tilting quizzically, he licked his lips as you approached with an impossible slowness. Neither of you could look anywhere else, gazes locked, bodies pulling together like magnets.

Joel’s pouty lips parted in surprise when you didn’t seat yourself next to him, electing instead to climb onto his lap. He blinked owlishly at you as your face moved closer, centimeter by centimeter, until your lips met his in a delicate first kiss. However brief, that initial press of your lips against his ignited an inferno within you both. You mouths came together urgently the second time, as lips, teeth, and tongues clashed. Your fingers carded through his silky soft, thick curls, nails tenderly scratching itches on his scalp he didn’t even know he had. He preened under your touch.

So absorbed in each other after months and months of longing and pining, dancing around feelings you hid for each other, the rest of the room blurred to nonexistence. Your ears picked up soft murmuring from Maria and Tommy, but you ignored it. Your world revolved around Joel, and Joel only, at that moment. You shifted, trying in vain to bury beneath every layer of his skin, until you straddled his lap.

At long last, you pulled back as the need for oxygen became unbearable. You and Joel had been pressed so close together, noses smushed as you kissed, that neither of you could even breathe.

“I take it you figured it out.” Joel’s eyes searched your face, voice rumbling from deep in his chest, the sound like velvety chocolate to your ears.

You nodded, lost for words at first and his lips slowly tilted upwards at the corners until his smile reached its limit and the precious dimple in his cheek poked through. “The flowers and notes were so beautiful, Joel. I’m sorry I didn’t figure it out sooner, your riddles were just too good,” you grinned. Tears pricked at the back of your eyes at the look of complete adoration on his handsome face. Sincere happiness welled within you. “The notes, each one more beautiful than the last, I read them over and over. I feel all of that, too.”

Joel’s eyes took on a different shine at your confession, the fire from the hearth glinted in the sudden wetness glazing over them.

“Can I take you home?” he asked gruffly, the need evident in his glossy gaze.

“Fuck yes,” you breathed, giggling as he shifted you both to your feet and practically dragged you from his brother’s house. Neither of you had the wherewithal to say goodbye to Tommy and Maria. They watched the two of you leave with matching satisfied grins before locking up behind you.

“Yours or mine?” Joel questioned urgently as his large hand grasped yours.

“I don’t care,” you replied breathlessly, “whichever is closer.”

“Yours then.” His long legs led you down the deserted street, boots crunching on the hard ground, stopping only once you reached your front porch. He stared into your wide eyes, taking in the vision of your blown pupils and pursed lips. “Are you sure about this?”

“Joel,” you drew his name out in a long sigh, one hand caressing the scruff on his cheek. “I have never been surer of anything in my entire life. Take me inside and make love to me. Please.”

The pitch of your plea shot straight to his cock as he once again nearly dragged you behind him. Grateful that you forgot to lock the front door, there were no impediments to your journey into the house and straight up the stairs to your bedroom.

The urgency slowed once the both of you reached the center of your bedroom. Facing each other as you stood next to the large bed, Joel’s gaze tangibly seared your skin with the absolute heat of it.

“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured, one thick fingertip tracing the ridge of your brow and down the slope of your nose. His bedroom eyes captivating as he pulled at your plump bottom lip with his thumb, lips twitching when your tongue darted out to taste the salt on his skin. “I think I fell in love with you the day we met.”

“Me, too.” Mesmerized by Joel’s touch and thoughtful words, you leant forward, slanting your mouth against his. The kiss tender yet scalding hot as your hands began to slowly undress one another. Part of you could not believe this was happening, while another part of you kept repeating fucking finally.

Once you were both fully stripped of clothing, Joel eased you back onto the bed. The broadness of him hovered over you, legs entangled, and he caressed your skin with one large hand. There was no piece of you he left untouched. Your own hands were drawn to his luscious curls, fingers threading through the locks and massaging his scalp.

Joel soon replaced his hands with his mouth, placing soft, open-mouthed kisses down your body. He paid special attention to your breasts, pausing to lave and nip at the hardened peaks of your nipples. A surprised gasp flew from your mouth when he settled his face between your legs, darting his tongue out to taste your sweetness.

He feasted on you like a starving man, tongue laving at your clit before dipping inside to slurp at your juices. You were so wet for him. Only him. His mouth a form of heaven you didn’t know existed, you mewled and squirmed, muscles twitching as he drew you closer and closer to the cliff’s edge.

“Fuck, you are so good at this, Joel.” The half-moaned words fell from your lips when he slipped a thick finger inside you, quickly followed by another. His mouth continued to work at your clit, licking and sucking as you writhed beneath his ministrations.

A man possessed; Joel drew two orgasms from you before letting up. Easing back, he grinned at you, his facial hair glossy with your juices. “You taste fucking delicious. I could stay down here all night.”

A dewy sheen of sweat covered your entire body from being worked over so well. “Any other time, I wouldn’t stop you. But I want your cock inside me, right now.”

“Is that so?” Joel smirked at you, climbing up your body to settle his hips between your legs. Of their own accord, your hands soothed over the warm skin of his back and down to his ass, where you grabbed handfuls of the meaty flesh.

“Fuck, yes. Please, I need you.”

His eyes sparkled at your plea, but he didn’t move an inch. Your right hand reached between the two of you, grasping hold of his cock and gasping at the sheer size of him. Long and thick in your hand, your mouth watered at the thought of tasting him sometime. Joel grinned again, his expression quickly going slack as you tugged once, twice at his hardened length, running the head between your folds before lining him up with your entrance.

Dark eyes hooded with lust; Joel met your gaze. “You want this?” he questioned one last time, needing confirmation of your consent. The last thing he’d ever want to do is push you too far, too fast. He wanted this to last forever.

“Joel, I promise. I have never wanted someone more than I want you, and only you, right now.” You poured every emotion, every feeling for Joel through your eyes as you pulled him impossibly closer. Angling your hips up, he finally started feeding you his cock, inch by delectable inch. Your mouth dropped open at the stretch when he bottomed out.

“You’re taking me so well, pretty girl.” Joel began to move his hips in a slow, steady rhythm, his arms bracketing your head.

“Ahhh, I’ve never felt so full before. Please don’t stop.”

Soon enough, the only sounds in the room were the gentle slap of skin against skin, your breathy moans, and Joel’s rumbling grunts. Joel kissed you passionately as he fucked into you with deep thrusts, his eyes remaining locked on yours.

Your orgasm built as his cock grazed that perfect spot inside you with each thrust, and the words you’d been too afraid to admit to finally fell from your lips. “I love you, Joel. I love every single piece of the puzzle that you are.”

“And I love you, my angel,” Joel replied, voice gravelly. His hips snapped harder, throwing you both over the cliff. His deep moans were music to your ears as you pulsed around him, drawing every drop of cum from him until he settled heavily half atop you, breathless and sated.

“I can’t wait to do that again,” you blurted, chest heaving, drawing a chuckle from Joel.

“Imma need some time before I can do that again, angel. I’m not a young stud anymore.”

For the first time in many months, you fell asleep in your bed, the vastness of it decreased by Joel’s warm body cuddled up against you.

“You have everything you need, brother?” Tommy asked, helping Joel load up the saddlebags. “Maria tucked a bottle of wine and some glasses in here for you.”

Doublechecking the supplies, Joel nodded. “I think that’s all of it. Thank your wife for me. None of this would be happening right now without you, Maria, and Ellie.”

Tommy patted his older brother on the shoulder. “Being in love has really softened your edges. I actually like this version of you.”

Joel scowled back at Tommy’s teasing for a moment before his face transformed into a glowing, warm smile at the sight of you. Backpack slung over one shoulder, you wore fitted jeans, a tee shirt, and boots with Joel’s green flannel tied around your waist. To Joel, you’d never looked sexier.

“Hi boys,” you greeted, eyes lingering on the older Miller brother as he winked at you. Turning to Tommy, you batted your eye lashes. “Any chance you’ll tell me where he’s taking me?”

Tommy guffawed. “Not a chance in hell, doll. I don’t wanna get my ass kicked by this lug.”

Oh well, you had to try. Shrugging your shoulders, you climbed up into the saddle of a light brown colored horse. “Fine then. You better make sure my greenhouses are still in one piece when we get back.”

“Yeah, yeah. Off you go lovebirds.” Tommy patted your horse’s hind quarter once Joel mounted his horse and led the way through the town gate.

The horses settled into a canter, covering the landscape at a good clip. “It’s a couple hours ride, but I promise you’ll love it, angel.”

“I trust you, Joel,” you replied, lips pressed into a small smile. “I’m just happy to spend time with you.”

The pair of you chatted about anything and everything as you rode, sharing stories about your pre-outbreak past and the struggles faced since. You already knew about Sarah and how hard Joel took the loss of his beloved baby girl, but Joel felt comfortable sharing more stories of her with you. The conversations were interspersed with occasional comfortable silences as you took in the landscape and kept an eye out for trouble. The hours and miles passed in no time and Joel led you to a stop in front of a rusted-over fence. Dismounting the horse, you swiped a hand over a warped sign which indicated the property was a botanical garden in its former life.

“Joel,” you breathed, touched that he thought of taking you to such a place for your first official date. You had no idea it even existed.

“It’s rundown, obviously, but nature has completely taken over in a way that I think you’ll love. There were flowers everywhere when I first discovered the place. This is where I found some of the ones I gave you,” he explained. Pulling a section of fence open, he led you and the horses onto the property before closing it behind you.

“Tommy and I cleared the placed a while ago, but there may still be some cordyceps lingering around. Keep an eye out.” Joel handed you a pistol, checking first to make sure it was locked and loaded, and swung the rifle from his shoulder.

The grounds were quiet except for birdsong and the rustle of leaves in the breeze. Plentiful flora grew in every direction you turned, overtaking dilapidated benches and buildings alike. The grounds were a vibrant sea of colorful flowers and plants, and a mix of floral fragrances nearly overwhelmed your senses. Joel led the horses into a small area cordoned off on three sides, leaving them to graze while the two of you explored.

Joel reached for your hand, entwining your fingers as you walked the grounds. Even overgrown and unkempt as it was, the garden left you in awe. You strolled, recounting information about every flower you recognized. Joel listened, enraptured, as you spoke about their meanings, falling in love with you even more with every brilliant word that came out of your mouth.

He surprised you with a late lunch in a field of wildflowers on the way back to Jackson, gathering a small bouquet in his hands while you ate. Joel tucked a bright yellow flower with long, thin petals into your hair before handing over the bouquet.

“When you’re ready, I’m going to ask you to marry me, my beautiful wildflower.”

fin

[beenbaanbuun]

tears - opposites attract

this is kind of short but i was thinking about jongho and i had to write something about him. i’m working on requests and i should be finished with a few of them soon 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

——————————————————————————

mingi…

that bastard has stolen your werewolf from you. it’s just for today and hongjoong promised seonghwa that the two of them—and probably mingi as well—would be back in time for dinner. he promised he’d let san know to make dinner as usual, but as of yet he hasn’t stepped out of his greenhouse once. something about being on the ‘precipice of a breakthrough!’ is what he told you that morning when he slipped out of bed far earlier than you or hongjoong, although a breakthrough of what, you’re unsure.

the first part of the morning was spent with san, trailing him around the house as he tidied and cleaned. you’d asked him what he’d be doing on his day off the following week; he told you he didn’t know but it’s almost certain that he wouldn’t be going home. he mentioned the price of train tickets being too expensive, but with the way he bowed his head to hide his expression, you could tell there was something more going on. you didn’t push, just like you wouldn’t want san to push. instead you stand there in a sad silence as san dusts the mantle piece in the living room.

“did you know this house is haunted?” you break the silence as you cast your gaze across the rug in the centre of the room. you can almost hear the crying that comes hand in hand with your ghost, the sound becoming almost comforting the more you hear it. it sounds strange to say that; to admit that you take comfort from someone else’s misery, but it’s the truth. the sound of his quiet sniffles has become synonymous with friendship and love and affection.

san turns to you with an eyebrow raised.

“well i’d have to assume so,” he takes a moment to look around the room, gesturing to all the antiquities and grandiose, “all this shit is bound to carry a few spirits, right?” the dust cloth he carries brushes past your arm as he takes it back to the mantle; you brush the filthy residue away with a grumble. “i don’t really care as long as they don’t come into my room. i’m far too tired to be dealing with ghosts whenever i try to sleep.”

you giggle at the image of the tearful man standing at the foot of san’s bed, staring at the butler with wet eyes and a frown. if san could see him, you have no doubt he’d take pity on the poor creature. as it stands, the idea is simply that; an idea.

“he might be,” you shrug, “but you wouldn’t know. the further he gets from his pelt, the less visible he becomes.”

the thought breaks your heart a little now that you dwell on it. he could be anywhere at any time and you just wouldn’t know it; does he ever feel ignored? or trapped? to have the only love you’ve ever received confined to a single room must be tough. it’s like an ultimatum that neither of you had a say in. a cruel trick from the universe to punish him for his spirit remaining here so long after his death. perhaps he yearns to move on, to find reprieve from the loneliness that haunts the walls of this house just as he does. the very house that has become your freedom must feel like a prison for him.

you wonder for a moment how long he’s been dead for, but the thought seems to manifest itself as a lump in your throat. he told you in his own words that he’d never known love before, just as hongjoong said the rug had been a family heirloom. you dread to think how many generations it has been passed through, each of them bringing even more loneliness and sorrow to the bear.

it makes sense now, why he cries. at first you figured it might be pain, that perhaps he still feels the weapon that led to his death lodged in his heart. in a way you suppose it is pain, and you have no doubt that it’s in his heart, but just not in the way you expected.

with a sigh, you leave the butler’s side to take a seat on the rug. you want to be close to him right now, for your own benefit as much as his. even though you can’t see him right know, you know he’s right there beside you. the shiver that runs up your arm is enough to confirm that fact. you don’t wipe it away or hide from in, instead basking in that icy cold feeling that makes your goosebumps blossom like the flowers in seonghwa’s greenhouse. you hope he can see them and know that even when he can’t be seen, he can still be felt.

you hope he knows you could never ignore him.

[cottonlemonade]

A Simpler Life - Masterlist and random Headcanons

pairing: post-time skip Kita x chubby!Reader genre: fluff, slice of life, mutual pining, slow burn, eventual smut warnings: spoilers, eventual mdni, nsfw (part 4) synopsis: In pursuit of a calmer, simpler life you flee the city to move to the countryside - only to fall in love with your neighbor. [part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4]

Here are some thoughts I had while writing that didn’t find a space in the story:

> it took Kita a solid hour to formulate his first note to you

> before having sex for the first time, Kita goes to buy condoms while he is on an errand in the city so as to not alert the entire town - he is really careful about it all only to then realize that you went to buy condoms at the town‘s pharmacy so all his sneaking was for naught and he gets knowing looks next time he’s grabbing supplies from the local hardware store

> he swears the local grannies to secrecy so nothing gets back to Yumie before it‘s time

> he has definitely been happy about accidentally cutting his hand while trimming a tree because he was looking forward to getting fussed over by you

> when you start dating, Roku‘s bed systematically moves closer to the house every couple of weeks - of course Kita notices but he doesn‘t say anything because he thinks it‘s too adorable and by Christmas morning Roku‘s bed is inside, in the corner next to the front door

> I looked up typical dog names in Japan and found that it‘s usual to name dogs numbers depending on their litter size and it felt very appropriate for Kita to do that (Roku means six)

> when you mention that you miss certain veggies from your home country that are not readily available in Japan Kita goes out of his way to grow them for you in his greenhouse

> Kita continues to run his farm successfully while you spend your days helping out around town with whatever necessary 

someone called in sick at the bookstore? They call you to jump in

they need help organizing a school festival? They know you have the best ideas

one of the grannies wants to paint her bedroom pink? She knows who to call

these little odd jobs fulfill you so much more than any office ever did and Kita is so ridiculously proud of how fast you became such an integral part of his community

> he proposes to you with those little wild tulips

> (I chose these plants because a) I wanted a small wildflower native to Japan and b) white tulips symbolize purity, innocence and respect, plus these particular flowers (tulipa edulis) are said to have an effect of vigor - imo that just fit perfectly because as I said before, once Kita has you, he is insatiable)

[alrightieaphroditie]

harder | j.m  series masterlist!

pairing *:·ﾟjoel miller x female!reader wc *:·ﾟ5.7k warnings *:·ﾟ18+! minors please do not interact!! v angsty at first, mentions of death and overall sad topics... then we go into a lil bit of kissing, some dirty talk if you squint, teasing, pet names (baby, sugar), titty play, some praise, probably poorly written smut lmao an *:·ﾟit's been a hot second since i tried writing smut and damn am i insecure about it lmaoo this took longer than anticpated too because i sadly lost half of it almost immediately after writing it... so yeah. feedback is hella appreciated on this, and it isn't quite proofread so if you catch something please let me know!! i enjoyed writing this (like a lot) so i really hope you all enjoy reading this! <3 

synopsis *:·ﾟever since the dinner at your place, joel and ellie have fit themselves into your life seamlessly. when joel gets back from a hunting trip, he comes over and shows you some new tricks. (18+!)

over the course of a couple months, joel and ellie had fit themselves into your life like puzzle pieces. 

the pair would come over to your house once a week every week after that first dinner together, and sometimes you would cook, sometimes you'd grab some food to go from the tipsy bison. they would help you set the table, ellie nagging joel most nights about how slow he was moving to put the silverware around the table. you would all eat, then ellie would sneak into the living room while you and joel cleaned together. and then the three of you would sit around your coffee table, playing board games or cards. or you'd go to see the movie playing in town, or you'd go for a walk around the neighborhood. 

these nights with them quickly became your favorite moments of the week. you had formed a close bond with ellie, and the more time you spent with joel, the harder you fell for him. most nights ellie would fall asleep in the guest room you had set up for her, and you and joel would spend hours talking together out on the porch like you did that first night. 

sometimes you'd talk about nothing major. he'd comment on how the greenhouses were doing, which was where you helped the community out the most, and it would get you talking about all the vegetables and flowers you were trying to grow. or you'd ask how his patrol shift went, and he'd complain to you about his partner. it was small talk, but with someone like joel, it meant a lot to you that he was willing to simply sit on your wooden bench beside you and listen. 

sometimes, after a long week, you'd make joel a glass of whiskey (which you had started to keep around simply for the man. how he didn't know how much you crushed on him was beyond you. maybe it was his age.) and you'd talk about the harder things. your time spent in the bunker your family built. how your best friend was murdered by a group of hunters after they had kept you captive for weeks. how they used you. how you managed to kill them all while they slept because they got lazy and assumed you were too weak. 

joel had had a hard time listening to it, but he insisted that he wanted to hear about your past. the guilt he felt was indescribable. he wasn't the one to keep you captive, to use you, but with his past as a hunter he couldn't help but feel like he played a role in your pain. he had spent a lot of time repressing his emotions regarding that aspect of his life, but you encouraged him to talk about it. to feel his emotions. you told him over and over again that you didn't blame him, weren't scared of him. didn't judge him. 

it was hard for him to hear, to believe, but your consistency helped him more than he would ever admit. he was more welcome in jackson now than he was when he first arrived, mostly thanks to you, but he still felt like an outsider. like people were just waiting for a pin to drop and for him to reduce back into the monster of a man they claimed him to be. he was tired of trying to prove to everyone that he was simply just a man who survived the only way he knew how to. but with you? he didn't feel the need to apologize for who he was. he could settle with you, and that was something he hadn't felt in a long time. 

on the simpler nights, joel would talk about his life before the outbreak, how he and tommy worked in contracting and how he missed doing things with his hands. he'd talk about always being busy, always doing something, when the world turned. about how he was skeptical of the community when he and ellie first stumbled upon it because for once, for the first time since the outbreak, he wasn't constantly having to look over his shoulder for something bad. 

on the harder nights, the ones where joel felt like he needed more than one glass of liquor, he confided in you about sarah. about tess. about how his relationship with tommy had changed and he didn't know what he needed to do to fix it anymore. about his insecurities with ellie, how he didn't trust his mind anymore to make the right decisions when it came to her because he was too attached. 

he told you all of the things he swore he would never talk about again, and you simply sat there, listening, sharing his burden. the way your hand would rest gently on his arm while he talked, squeezing it every once in a while, to encourage him to go on, it provided him with a strength he didn't know he needed. 

joel didn't know this, but that night when he first told you about sarah and the events that happened on his birthday, after he and ellie had left, you spent the rest of your night crying in your bed. crying for joel, for the loss he had experienced. for how the world had turned and how he had to manage the loss of his own world on top of it. for how he was never properly able to grieve her death. 

you were beginning to see a side of joel you don't think anyone has seen in a long time. you were also starting to understand why joel miller was the man he is today. after learning about his past, his experiences, and his trauma, you recognized and could empathize why he felt the need to guard his heart the way he has been. it was a testament to his strength, how he could keep going while carrying all of that inside of him, and you admired the hell out him. 

and somehow, you had worked your way into his heart, through his guards. and joel may not have known it yet, but you were there to stay, and you would be for as long as he let you. 

you were constantly thinking about the man, your days spent replaying your conversations in your mind and getting giddy just remembering them. you honestly were a bit concerned, considering you've never felt this way about anyone before. you wanted to ask maria about it, but then she'd pester you into telling her who you were crushing over, and you didn't think it would go over too well considering joel was twice your age and, well, him. 

so, you kept it to yourself, letting your mind fantasize about what it would be like to actually be with joel, physically, romantically, all of it. 

you hadn't seen joel in a couple of days, as he was one of the men selected to go hunt. he wouldn't be back for a few more days, either, and you hated to admit it but you missed him. and you wondered if he missed you too. if he ever thought about you while he was away. he was so hard to read, even now, and sometimes you thought about just grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him while you unloaded all of your feelings onto him. 

but if there was one thing you knew about joel miller, it was that he would absolutely hate that. so... you kept it to yourself. 

you had just gotten home after spending all day in the greenhouse with ellie. maria had you showing her the vegetation that the community was working on, showing her the ins and outs of gardening and how to properly pick the fruit that was growing. she loved it, of course, and on her breaks, she spent most of the time sketching the different fruits and flowers in the little sketchbook joel had found for her. 

it was a good day, but a busy one, and you were exhausted. the sun was already starting to set, and you wanted to cuddle up on your couch with one of the romance novels your friend had brought you with a cup of tea. you were still dressed in your work outfit - a pair of olive-green linen pants and simple black cotton t-shirt - and you were already planning on stepping into your pajamas early when a knock on your door startled you. 

a glance through the little peephole on your door had your heart racing. joel was standing on your porch, one of his arms behind his back as he glanced around. you could see the muscles in his arm bulge against the faded red t-shirt he was wearing, and that sight alone could've fueled your fantasies for a month straight. 

a grin was plastered on your face as you unlocked the front door, and his dark eyes found yours easily through the screen door. "joel miller, as i live and breathe. what are you doin' here?" you adopted an exaggerated southern accent, something you and ellie started doing to poke fun of joel for his texan roots. he kept telling you guys it wasn't funny, but you could always see a small smile on his lips every time you did it.

even now as he rolled his eyes at you, you could see the edges of his mouth quirk up in a smirk, and fuck but you loved it. "you think you're so damn funny with that, don't you?" he asked, his gaze trailing down your body so quickly you almost missed it. but you didn't, and now your face was burning bright red. 

"ellie would agree with me and you know it, mister." you argued, pushing the screen door open for joel to come in. he didn't move, though, keeping his arm behind his back with a mischievous gleam in his eyes. you crossed your arms over your chest. "but for real, i thought you were gonna be out a few more days with everyone else?" it was rare that the hunting party would come back early, but not uncommon either. 

"didn't have much luck in the area we were in, so we figured we'd come back and regroup before leaving again. i found somethin' though," he trailed off, a full smile encompassing his mouth now. something you had learned about joel in your months of studying him was that gift giving was a huge thing for him. he mainly brought stuff back for ellie, but you've noticed lately that he had been finding little things here and there for you too. you wondered what that meant.

you could just barely make out the edges of something behind his legs, but you couldn't quit tell what it was. your arms slipped from your chest, your hands moving out and making a grabby motion. "you want me to close my eyes?" you teased, making a point of squinting your eyes so that you could see just a sliver of joel between them. he shook his head at you, grumbling something about how weird you were becoming, and he moved his arm from back behind his body. 

"joel!" you gasped; mouth dropped in awe as he presented a perfectly intact guitar. "this is amazing! you do know what this means now, right?" his eyebrow rose as he took in the sight of you gently holding the instrument. he had been pretty proud of the find, taking care to clean off the vines and dirt that had dusted itself around the guitar. considering you had been begging him for lessons for weeks since ellie mentioned he could play the guitar; he knew what was coming. 

he wanted to tease you about it, regardless. 

"if i hear the words 'guitar lessons' come out of your mouth, 'm leavin'." he threatened, crossing his arms across his chest. his worn t-shirt strained against his muscles and tightened around his chest, and it took everything in you not to stare. his tone was mean, as mean as he could get with you, but then he did something you weren't expecting - he winked at you. 

you squealed internally. 

“that’s not fair and you know it, miller. we literally have a guitar now! what else are we gonna do with it?” you complained playfully, your voice light. you started backing up into the house, joel’s arm reaching out to catch the screen door before it slammed shut in his face. he followed you in, making sure to close both doors and kicking his work boots off next to the small rug you had inside. 

you were still marveling over the instrument, turning it over in your hands while taking it in. from what you remembered, this was a pretty standard guitar. the wood was a warm brown, and it had all six silvery strings connected still. you sat down on the carpet in front of your couch, balancing the guitar on your thighs. you were aware of joel as he entered the living room behind you, settling into one of the chairs you had on the other side of the room.

he was quiet as he watched you get comfortable with the guitar, his brown eyes sweeping over your figure. your head was bent to the side, your hair falling in slight waves across your face as you studied where to put your fingers on the neck. he could see you biting your bottom lip as you concentrated, and he had to stealthy adjust himself in the chair as he watched. god, he thought. you looked so beautiful. 

his thoughts were interrupted by the loudest, most out of tune noise coming from you and the guitar. he had to fight off the urge to cover his ears, but then he wouldn’t have heard the sound of your laughter that followed quickly after, and that was something he never wanted to miss. his eyes were already on yours when you lifted your head to look at him, a sheepish smile on your face. “clearly i don’t know what i’m doing. your turn?” 

he hadn’t played the guitar in years, but he would be lying if he said his fingers weren’t itching to at least hold it again. he rubbed his palms against his jean clad thighs before standing up and taking the guitar from your outstretched hands. for some reason, he was nervous to play in front of you. he wanted it to be good, to be perfect, but with years of not practicing and with no idea how maintained this guitar was, he really couldn’t do much besides try. 

joel tested the guitar in his grip, absentmindedly strumming his fingers quietly while he fiddled with the pegs to tune it. and you sat there on your carpet, stars in your eyes as you watched his shoulders relax ever so slightly. you saw his foot tapping against the floor as he strummed, and it wasn’t a song you recognized but it immediately became your new favorite. 

he played for a lot longer than you anticipated, his eyes closing softly as his fingers worked the neck of the guitar. you wished in this moment that you had a camera, some way to capture the moment. you’ve never seen joel so relaxed, so in his element. his foot, tapping away against your floor. his hands, holding the guitar with a level of gentleness you weren’t expecting. his head, slowly bobbing along to the chords he played. the sunset was filtering through your window, casting him in an orangish glow. 

and your heart ached, thinking about the man before you who once dreamed of making a career out this. he was talented enough, that was for damn sure. you could easily imagine him somewhere up on a stage, holding the same guitar and preforming the same exact way. you wondered if he’d ever sing in front of you, but you didn’t want to push your luck. this alone was enough for you. 

the music eventually drifted away softly, joel’s fingers coming to rest as he strummed it one last time. he cleared out his throat when he finished, looking a little shy, but you weren’t having it. “joel, that was amazing.” you gushed, fighting the urge to clap for him. 

“s’nothin’ special,” he muttered, but you swore the tips of his cheeks turned a shade of light pink from the compliment. 

“that’s bullshit and you know it,” your tone was argumentative back, not wanting him to diminish his talents. you sat forward on your knees, clasping your hands together. “will you please teach me something, joel? anything? one singular basic chord?” you begged, giving him your biggest eyes and playful pout. 

“you’re almost worse than ellie is when she wants something.” he teased, rolling his head back on his neck before standing up to come sit behind you on the couch. his legs spread out, and from the corner of your eye you could see his thighs strain against his jeans. oh lord. 

“i’m taking that as a compliment. that girl is so headstrong and i love it,” you shuffled back so that your back was pressed against the couch, crossing your legs over the other again so that you could rest the guitar against your lap. you gave an experimental strum, and since joel worked on tuning it, the noise that came out was much more pleasant than your attempt earlier. 

“course you would,” the man behind you muttered, and you shot him a grin over your shoulder before adjusting your hands on the instrument. he leaned forward slightly, keeping an eye on your hands and not the way your shirt dipped down the front of your chest slightly. your skin was more exposed, and he could see a constellation of freckles littering your skin. fuck, but he wanted to kiss every single one of them. 

with a sigh, joel began telling you where to place your fingers along the neck for specific chords. he was patient, watching carefully as you figured them out with his help. every time you correctly struck the right chord, it made him grin. he liked seeing you so excited over this mundane activity. the way you were always so enthusiastic, so bright, it just drew him in like a moth to the light. he couldn’t help it. 

you had shifted away from the couch slightly, your back hunched over the instrument as you did you best to play it. you had picked up the simple chords pretty easily, but you were struggling with getting your finger placement correct on the last one joel gave you. joel kept telling you how easy this one was, too, which had started to frustrate you. the man’s hands were easily twice the size of your own, of course he would think it was easy. and you said as much to joel, too, who only chuckled in response. 

“know you can do it, sugar.” he encouraged quietly, scooting over on the couch so that his legs almost bracketed your body. he leaned forward, pulling your upper body back a bit from its slouch as he moved to help you. “keep your arm like this, and then stretch this finger as much as you can. you can move your wrist a little, too.” his rough hands were soon on top of your own, his applying a little more pressure so that he could guide your finger to the correct position. 

finally, you were able to hit the chord right, and you cheered for yourself as you strummed it a couple more times. joel’s hand had slide up your arm gently, resting on the top of your left shoulder while you played. he was still crouched over slightly, but when you turned your head to look at him, you were shocked with how close his face was to yours. 

now that you were facing him though, you could revel in the way his breath was hitting the spot on your neck just right, how it sent goosebumps down your arms and a shiver to your spine. if you tilted your head slightly, you’d bump his nose with your own. your eyes jumped to his, your hand gripping the neck of the guitar so tightly you worried that you were going to snap it. “joel,” you whispered, soft breaths parting from your lips as it opened slightly. 

his dark eyes met yours, and that was it.

you weren’t too sure who moved first. if it was you, dropping the guitar from your lap while you twisted up onto your knees in front of him. if it was him, the hand on your shoulder moving to rest at the base of your neck, squeezing it slightly as he guided you up to his mouth. joel’s thumb caressed your skin softly, and you felt yourself go weak in the knees.  

his mouth slanted across yours, and the feeling of his stubble scratching against your face made you whimper into his mouth softly. his hand tightened around your neck, using the leverage to pull you up from your knees, while his other hand guided you by your hip to straddle one of his legs on the couch. your hands went from his shoulders to his hair to cupping the sides of his face. you could feel him grinning against your lips.

you’ve been kissed before but kissing joel was an entirely new experience. you have never done something that felt so right, so good. you never wanted this to stop. 

your legs adjusted your weight on his thigh, and you felt joel’s grip on your waist tighten as he pressed you down harder. you could feel the rough denim through your thin linen pants, and when joel moved his hand forward, your hip followed in his grip as he rocked you against his thigh. this was a new experience, however. the feeling of his solid thigh pressed against your core, and you suddenly felt much, much hotter. 

“joel,” you whispered again, though it came out in more of a whimper against his lips. his hand rocked you against him again, and yours slid to hold his shoulders and you tested the movement yourself, dragging your hips up his thigh and then back down. another whimper emitted from your lips, and you had half a mind to be embarrassed about the noise, but you were too caught up in the feeling. 

“i know, baby.” his voice was rough against your mouth, and he lowered his lips against yours again, this time angling his head to the side to deepen the kiss. joel tugged on your bottom lip with his teeth, making you gasp softly at the hint of pain before his tongue covered the spot. he took the opportunity of your open mouth to move his tongue in against yours, and you basically crumpled in his lap at how demanding he was as he kissed you. 

your hips had started to steadily move against his thigh on your own, but his big, rough hand was still resting on your hip, his fingers digging little half-moon bruises into your skin as he helped you press a little harder. joel gave your throat one last little squeeze before he moved to the hem of your t-shirt, his fingers slipping underneath ever so slightly. you could feel the calluses on his hands as he trailed them across your stomach lightly, and your breath caught in your throat as he brushed his thumb over the material of your bra, right where your nipple would be. 

you were so overwhelmed by everything joel - his taste, his touch, his smell. you didn’t want to, but you felt yourself struggling to catch a breath, so you pulled away from his mouth slightly, brushing his nose with yours gently. he could feel the little pants coming from your mouth as you exhaled, could hear the smallest of whimpers riding along those exhales as well. everything about you in this moment was working for him, so well that he was trying to think of something ridiculous to stop himself from coming in his damn jeans like a teenager. 

“god, sugar,” he said lowly, trailing his nose across your jaw and down your neck before settling his lips on the base of your throat. the feeling made you giggle softly, but it quickly turned into a louder moan as he started to suck on your skin. “you’re ridin’ my thigh so well, huh?” the compliment had you blushing even more than before. 

you never would’ve imagined that joel, quiet, stoic, joel, would be talking to you like one of the heroes in your romance novels. it was better than anything you could have ever thought of. 

“it feels so good, joel,” you whined, sliding your hand from his shoulder to cup the back of his head. you let your fingers dig into his skin, pulling on the small strands of his hair lightly as you bucked your hips against him. he let out a low groan against your neck, his fingers underneath your shirt pinching the spot his thumb just brushed against. 

he couldn’t help but let out a chuckle. “fuck, i knew you’d be too good to resist. you look so pretty, takin’ what you want from me.” he nipped at your neck, grinning against your skin as you cried out. letting go of your hip, he moved his hand under your shirt with the other one, raising it just enough so that he could see the black bra you were wearing. “can i move this down?” he asked so politely, pressing a small kiss against the skin he just bit.

considering the position you were in, the pleasure this man was making you feel by simply kissing you, you were inclined to let him do whatever he so pleased with you. all you could do was nod your head, give him a small “mhm,” as your eyes started to flutter shut from the tingling sensation happening low in your stomach. 

you heard joel give you a quiet “thank you, baby,” before his hands tugged down the front of your bra. he didn’t bother pulling your shirt off, he didn’t bother taking the bra off entirely. instead, he managed to pull them low enough to have your tits spill over the top, and he bit back a groan before he lowered his mouth to take one of your nipples into his mouth. 

the feeling of his warm mouth against your sensitive skin had you arching your back, pressing your front closer against joel. he slid one of his hands to your lower back, his skin rough against yours, as he encouraged you to move your hips against him. your hand in his hair gripped tightly, practically holding joel against your chest as he nipped and sucked. 

your inner thighs were starting to shake from the movements, and his name was leaving your mouth like a prayer. it only encouraged him more, and he started to softly bounce his leg while you moved against it, giving you even more friction. you felt the heat from your stomach pool to your center, and you weren’t even able to form a coherent thought anymore. you couldn’t help your eyes from squeezing shut, couldn’t help your mouth from falling open, couldn’t help the borderline pornographic moans that emitted from your lips. 

“that’s it, sugar. gonna make yourself cum against my thigh, huh?” joel asked, pulling away from your chest as he watched you with hooded eyes. you were completely lost in the pleasure, could feel yourself soak through your panties with how wet you were becoming. you had never cum like this before, but god this would definitely not be the last time. that was a sentiment that you both had shared. 

“fuck, joel,” you squeaked out, increasing your hips movements against his thigh. his hand on your back gave you support, and he pinched your nipples roughly once more before he gripped your throat and brought your mouth back against his. this kiss was harder, messier, and more urgent than the kiss before. your teeth bumped against his, you felt your lips getting wet with spit, and fuck but you loved it. joel was usually so in control, so calm, and seeing him become so rushed, so frantic, it nearly pushed you to your orgasm alone. 

the thing that did it for you, though, was joel pulling away slightly, your noses brushing together as he offered you quiet words of encouragement. “you’re doing such a good job, just like that, baby. look at you, makin’ a mess on my thigh.” his breath invaded your space, making you gasp as you fought to get air as his hand tightened around your neck. he kissed you once more, just a gentle press of his lips against yours, and you lost it. 

your body curled in on itself as you came, white hot heat flooding your senses as you fell into joel’s chest with a loud cry. you were gripping him tightly, anchoring yourself to him as your body trembled. he held you tightly, brushing your hair back from your sweaty forehead and rubbing his hand up and down your back. he was grinning the entire time, his ego raising indefinitely at the fact that he had been able to make you feel this good. 

your face was pressed in the crook of his neck, and you were surprised to find genuine tears lingering in your eyes. that knowledge had you giggling, and you must have been delirious because you couldn’t stop it from happening. joel tilted his head back. “what the hell are you laughin’ at right now?” he asked, incredulously. he had never had a girl laugh after being with him. 

you could hear the slight panic in his voice, which made you laugh even more, but you sat back. “you made me cry,” you admitted to him, running your fingers underneath your eyes to wipe away the stray tears. joel let out a snort, which had you laughing once again. his thumbs moved to replace your fingers, gently moving across your skin until the wet was cleared up. he leaned up, placing a kiss gently on your forehead. “you okay?” he asked, softly caressing your skin with his hands. 

you bit down on your bottom lip, feeling more than okay, and you gave him a quick nod before taking his mouth with yours. the kiss was soft, but you were well intended to give joel the same amount of affection. your hand had just trailed down his chest, stopping at the waistband of his jeans, when you heard your front door open. 

“hello?” ellie’s voice rang out from the entryway, forcing you and joel apart. you had never moved so quickly, swinging your leg off of his thigh and fixing your top to cover your chest once again. you were still kneeling on the couch near joel when ellie stomped her way into the living room, giving the two of you a weird look. “why are you guys sitting so close to each other?” 

“she had somethin’ in her eye,” joel’s response was so quick, it almost made you snort. “what the hell are you doin’ here, kid? and didn’t i teach you how to knock first?” his irritation was palpable, which you found funny. poor guy was probably seconds away from coming in his pants. 

“geez, sorry. i saw that some of the other guys were back early, and you weren’t home so i figured you’d be here.” she explained, holding her hands up in surrender. joel pinched the bridge of his nose with one hand, trying to get his breathing under control. he had no right to be mad at ellie, and it wasn’t that he was actually mad… he was just trying not to embarrass himself in front of you. 

“why’d you figure that, els?” you asked, loving the fact that ellie knew joel well enough that he would come over here if he wasn’t at home first. even if you guys had just made out on your couch, you still liked the validation that joel maybe, possibly liked you back. 

“where else would he be? he literally never leaves the house unless it’s to come over here, and he hasn’t shut up about you since you first met.” she threw herself down in one of the chairs across the room from you, completely oblivious to the glare joel was shooting her way. 

“oh really?” your voice was teasing as you turned your head to joel, who easily fixated his glare on you. you wiggled on your knees slightly next to him, which caused his eyes to darken. 

“don’t you ‘oh, really?’ me like that. is this how it’s gonna be? the two of you gangin’ up on me from now on? because i don’t think i like it very much.” he slouched back against the couch, folding his arms across his chest. 

“yes, you do.” you and ellie chirped back at the same time, giving each other a grin as joel shook his head. he muttered something under his breath before standing up, adjusting his jeans as he did. ellie hopped up from her chair, too, rubbing her hands on her stomach. “can we get something from the tipsy bison? i’m starving.” 

“sure, kid.” joel responded, ruffling her hair as she passed by him. she didn’t even bother to wave goodbye before she moved out the front door, leaving joel and you alone again. he glanced at the door until it was shut before turning back your way, placing his hand under your chin to lift your gaze up to him.

“we’ll talk about this later, yeah?” he asked, his brown eyes soft as they focused on your face. you simply nodded, finding yourself shifting up on your knees so that you could kiss him one more time. joel sighed as you did, nipping at your bottom lip before pulling away. he bid you a goodnight before he followed ellie out of your house. 

sinking back into the couch cushions, you couldn’t help but let yourself freak out for a moment. never in your wildest dreams did you anticipate your evening taking a turn like this, and you were looking forward to seeing joel again so that you could talk. hopefully, talking isn’t the only thing we do, you thought, the grin on your face wider than ever. 

after kissing joel miller, it was decided. you were falling harder and harder for that man, and you didn’t mind it a single bit. 

tag list *:·ﾟ@yyiikes @farintonorth @scarletsloveletter @miss-celestial-being @thatgingefromtheinternet @javicstories @marianita195 @feliciab1990

[sunflowervoltwentyeight]

Happy 28th! Here is my April 2024 fic rec, organized by word count, from longest to shortest. You can view my other fic recs here. Enjoy!

When All Is Said And Done by lovelarry10 / @chloehl10 (76k)

“You must be thinking of another of your ex-husbands,” Louis snapped back, and Harry stilled, slowly turning to face him. There was something almost dangerous in Harry's look then but Louis stayed firm, not cowering away.

“Thankfully, I only have the misfortune of one ex-husband,” Harry said darkly, snatching up the plates and slamming them onto the table. 

*****

Louis and Harry were married, but things fell apart, ending in divorce, broken hearts and separate lives. Years later, their paths cross once more, and time together forces old feelings to resurface. But is it too little, too late?

Greenhouses AU Series by TiredTiredTz / @tiredtiredtz (63k)

Glass Closets and Greenhouses (60k) Charlton Athletic defender Louis Tomlinson and worldwide sex symbol Harry Styles are rumoured to be hooking up after a viral video filmed at Harry’s Wembley show was posted online by Tommo’s twin sisters. Sources close to the pair tell us the couple have been dating for a while, with rumours of house hunting, marriage and even kids on the cards! Styles, 29, is as well known for his whirlwind love life as his chart topping music. Most recently linked to British fashion designer Alex Millet-Sloan, Harry has stayed tight-lipped on rumours of any romantic rendezvous between himself and footballer Tomlinson, 31, yet fans online are convinced that all evidence points to #Tomlinstyles being the real deal. Not Conditional (3k) Harry is bald and this is how I’m coping. Set a few years after the events of Glass Closets and Greenhouses.

It Feels Different When You’re With Me by Rearviewdreamer / @all-these-larrythings (45k)

Harry fell in love with sign language as a kid. He never imagined the first love of his life would lead him straight to his second.

Every Lonely Place by HamPalpert (38k)

Facing the fact that he’s been prioritizing his career over his relationship, Harry proposes to his longtime boyfriend Louis on a whim. But when yet another work emergency takes precedence over their plans, Louis decides he’s had enough. Harry goes to bed drunk and alone, and when he wakes, he finds himself in an entirely different world. Over and over again, Harry visits a lifetime he’s once lived, across time and dimensions. And wherever there’s a Harry Styles, there’s a Louis Tomlinson.

The Act of Making Noise by suspendrs / @suspendrs (32k)

“Oh,” Harry frowns, waving him off. “No, I could never. I respect myself too much to sing for a living.”

It feels like a slap across the face, but Louis does his best not to stiffen, blinking once and then frowning. “What?”

“Those people are always so miserable, you know?” Harry says, hopping down off his stool and straightening his sweater. “There’s so much pressure on them, and they have to work so hard to keep up appearances, I can’t even imagine how difficult that is. I can’t even stand to listen to pop music today, let alone watch TV or read the magazines. It makes me so sad, thinking that those people, you know, the ones who actually went into it with heart, they only ever just wanted to make music and instead they got turned into things on leashes being paraded around to make money for other people,” he says. “Anyway, you can have the stool.”

Or, Louis's famous, Harry has no idea who he is, and they get snowed in together at a ski lodge in Vermont.

It’s About Time by kingsofeverything / @kingsofeverything (3k)

Best friends and roommates, Louis and Harry have been through a lot together, including law school for Louis, marriage and divorce for Harry. Their imminent eviction forces them to admit their feelings.

[missmarveledsblog]

Not just a flower child huh? ( logan howlett x reader ) part 3

summary : y/n finding her past haunting her more and more , people are starting to notice the way logan is with the new resident. when she gets upset she find she may have another gift to which leads to needing answers to what the lab done to her facing her fear of being tested on while her brother decides to make food from their childhood .

warnings : nightmare , flash backs, slow burnish , angst and fluff , google translated russian ( feel free to correct me ) , grammatical errors ( sorry )

( previous part)

Two months she was free  of the lab and yet she was still so out of place, she could talk to the kids and her brother mainly in russian as speaking english sometimes was bit exhausting . she did do the hangout thing with rogue both sitting in rogues room reading  but mostly in silence, short conversations but no more than a few sentences . she also would do same with people in the mansion unsure of how to socialize much, she also tied scott up couple more times although each time the vine got looser to point he was able to get himself out. She did love how more open the kids where lia and ana seemed love the attention of the other little girls and luka and henry loved the rough play with the other boys .  she couldn’t ask more than that , the kids actually getting to be kids . it was easier to talk to the younger residents , the older one though she could tell they were patient and it wasn’t them it was just hard concept of having people around . the greenhouse was her favorite place by far being able to have that quiet time and still watch the world around her it was best of both situations . she was even able to bring produce to the kitchen she learned to let it grow slower when they found themselves overstocked at one point but still it felt nice being able to contribute. 

The night though they never change each night she still would wake in a tear filled , panting and sweaty state . the screams were still as loud , the images still vibrant and vivid. Tonight she didn’t even bother trying to go back asleep . tiredly she dragged herself to the kitchen what she wasn’t expecting was her tea already on the counter made along with a blanket placed beside it and the back door open . wrapping the fuzzy soft material around her shoulder she took the mug in her hand and headed out only to smell that familiar scent. 

“ though you might enjoy looking at the stars without the glass in the way” logan turned to see her furrowed brow soften even a hint of a smile on her lips . 

“ don’t you ever sleep” she asked coming to his side as her eyes looked up at the sparkling stars . 

“ could ask you the same thing but i’m guessing your in the same boat” he turned back to look up at the sky. 

“ is sleep supposed to haunt you” she asked . 

“ i guess for us it does but it shouldn’t” he nodded . 

“ is the sky always like this ?” she asked again almost like a whisper. 

“ like what?” 

“ dark yet beautiful , i never seen anything like this in such alone time i used to think of it but it never was like this” . 

“ did you never get to see the outside world while you where there?” he asked chancing his arm on getting her to open up . 

“ not the sky no only a small window that would show if it was night or day” she mused. 

“ you made it not as bad for those kids , i mean without you they would of been well worse” he said looking at her seeing her eyes go glassy . 

“ i didn’t want them to feel like i did , i grew up in with those people , i know what that was like and i tried to make sure they didn’t” she sniffled looking up . “ i failed though” she added. 

“ you need to stop blaming yourself for something you had no control over”. 

“ it was my fault i tried to escape , i tried to leave and if i wasn’t knocked out i could of saved the others” she finally said running off back into the house . 

Morning finally came but she didn’t sleep not one bit , the past played in her head on loop almost like it was her own form of torture and she couldn’t get it out of her head nothing not even the stories she read could stop it . she walked down to the kitchen eyes filled with exhaustion , filled with sorrow and sadness as she got a cup of coffee hoping that it would help. It wasn’t missed on the other her mood as anything plant like around her either crumpled to dust or began to rot. Leaving the with her cup she headed to the living room the plant in the hall wilting and withering in her trail as she passed by the professor and storm . 

“ hey you ok” storm asked. 

“ tired is all “ she nodded leaving to the living room . 

“ you go see that the kids have eaten” professor gave sad smile as he turned to the living room watching her head hang low almost hiding her face from anyone who might pass by. 

“ you know dear i don’t need to look in your mind to know something is wrong” he called making her look up . 

“ you look in my mind and you will change how you feel about me” she sniffled . 

“ i have seen, your thoughts are loud and it does not change a thing , you are not the monster you think you are” he came closer as she moved back into the sofa. 

“ i think you are wrong on this one , i could of just stayed if i didn’t move they would of been here too” she looked down at the book . 

“ how do you know that?” .

“ because i would of been able to protect them , stopped the bastards getting near” . 

“ you tried to save them all , you risked your own life time and time again that is not action of a monster” he told her. 

“ and yet they are dead and i am not” 

“  four of them are here , thriving because of you” 

“ and the scream of five haunt my every waking moment “ she looked him in the eyes showing him what it was that haunted her , showing him it all .

“ this changes nothing it just shows you been through more than you should of ever been and that blame you hold on yourself is misplaced” he shook his head. 

“ i don’t think this is something that we will ever agree on” she laughed dryly . 

“ you poor thing” jean gasped as she looked up seeing them all standing there .

“ please spare me your pity all off you i am a monster” her voice raise as the lights flickered around her even taking her by surprise. “ great something new” she huffed. 

“ how many powers do you have” scott asked absent mindedly .

“ that is one question i do not know the answer to, i’ve been with them almost two decades and they pumped every concoction into my veins , the mind stuff and elemental was what the rest is them” she sighed. 

“ we can run some test and see , it wont be like the lab it will be pain free and you can stop anytime or even say no” jean said to her. 

“ anytime?” she asked considering it needing to know herself. 

“ anytime” the redhead confirmed. 

“ when?” she asked 

“ now or anytime you want you are in control with this here and it always your choice” . 

“ is this in his book” she finally asked a small smile on her face. 

“ is it working?” jean smirked as y/n nodded. “ well then no it not” . 

“ you should take notes gold retriever… lets do this i need to know” she stood wiping the tears from her face. 

“She really haunted by her past huh ?” scott asked as they walked into the kitchen. 

“ very much so it’s not pretty and she blames herself for it” professor solemnly spoke. 

“ what happened ?” piotr  spoke up yet he didn’t know if he was truly ready to hear the extent of the horror his little sister face. 

“ it’s not my story to tell , maybe when she is ready she might share it but now we just have to let her deal with her feelings let her know she is not a monster she believes herself to be” . 

“ i have a idea it not much and its not going to heal her but i can make something she love as a child , our grandmothers stew no matter what  we need to get new vegetables and other things though” piotr looked around the room . 

“ logan and scott could you get what he needs?” storm asked . 

“ of course he will .. and me too” scott smirked . 

“ whats that suppose to mean”. 

“ meaning you follow her around like  the loyal what she call you again doberman” he chuckled. 

“ oh fuck off” logan rolled his eyes as the other tried hiding their knowing smirks.  “ let just get this shit” he huffed walking out the door. 

“ i don’t know how i feel about this” Piotr brows furrowed. 

“ you’ll get used to it” storm patted his shoulder. 

She sat on the metal bed looking around the lab nervously it was nothing like the ones she used to be in but still it made nervous regardless . 

“ we don’t have to do this now we can wait til you're feeling better” jean told her softly feeling the girl nervous state radiate off of her.  

“ it just the first lab i’ve been in i’ll be ok” she shook her head. 

“ if you want to stop anytime let me know ok remember this is all your choice” the redhead reminded her. 

“ lets just get started” . 

“ ok i’m going to take a blood sample if that’s ok..  Hey let me get your brother or the professor maybe logan?” she didn't miss the smile on the redheads mouth at the last one. 

“ my brother will do” she blushed. 

“ what is going on with you and logan?” .

“ nothing really he’s there at night guess he has nightmares too” she shrugged as jean smile grew wider. 

“ i don’t think thats it , logan stopped having those a while ago  not completely gone but he rarely has them “ .

“ then why does he come to the kitchen?” her head tilted . 

“ that’s one you’ll have to figure out yourself “ jean winked. “ i’ll go get your brother” . 

“ no just do it , can i hold your hand on your coat” she asked nervously yet her mind was no working over time at the new information . 

 “ of course i’ll be quick and it will only be a little pinch and done ready” she asked as y/n nodded . she winced feeling the little sting as she grabbed the womans coat only to feel the hand replace the fabric . “ there we are done that part now i’m going to scan you and put these on you it won’t hurt one bit and but remember we can stop anytime” . 

“ i’m ok i’m not scared anymore” y/n smiled . 

“ scotts right your smile is pretty” jean winked as she went to put the vile of her blood in the analysis machine . 

“ your boyfriend is not as annoying but don’t tell him i said that” y/n huffed out with a laugh. 

“ my lips are sealed , you ready for next part” . 

“ born ready” she nodded. 

It was nearly dinner time when they emerge from the lab when the scent hit her nose . one that brought her back into the past this time it was a happier time . suddenly she was the little girl who spent her days on  the rural farm lands of russia  the smell of her grandmothers stew would signal the womans arrival making her run as fast as her little legs would take her into the small farm house.  She would almost knock her grandmother over as she jumped into her arms . when she was there it meant her parent weren’t cruel  , they wouldn’t be so hard and harsh on her and her big brother in the presence of the elderly woman .  she also would get spoiled rotten with treats and toys , pretty dresses . it was her most cherished times one she would use to keep her going when she felt like giving up . if it wasn’t for her brother and grandmother well she didn’t know how she would of been in the world, now she could smell that memory in real time one . 

“ он пахнет ее. ( it smells like hers) “ she walked in seeing her brother standing at the stove stirring the pot. 

“я пытался довести это до совершенства.

 ( i tried to make it to perfection) “he chuckled as he pulled  the big pot off bringing it into the dinning room . she couldn’t help but almost float following after and she couldn’t help the tears that fell down her cheeks she was surprise she still had some left. 

“ я сделал хуже?

 ( did i make it worse?)” piotr asked worriedly . 

“ нет, это прекрасно, это слезы счастья.

 ( no it’s perfect , these are happy tears)” she wiped her face. “ happy tears” she said in english as they all looked at her. 

“ smells good” scott stood as he handed her the ladle and piotr handed her a bowl. 

She got herself a generous helping sitting as they all filled their own. The moment it hit her taste buds she moaned happily .

“ taste  like hers” she smiled once more. 

“ what is this , so good “ rogue asked as others hummed their agreement . 

“ Solyanka but our grandmothers version” piotr explained as y/n was too busy wolfing it down . 

“ taste like home” she said grabbing more  as Piotr sat a little taller with pride . 

“ do you remember any of her other dishes” storm asked. 

“ i have her recipe book” piotr said softly . 

“ wait you have it” y/n almost dived over table excitedly. 

“ yes in my room she sent it too me so i wouldn’t forget the good food” he chuckled. 

“ that means we can make her Borodinsky” she gasped animatedly probably the first some of them seen her so excited, so happy . 

“ yeah i can give it to you later” piotr smiled happily .

part 4

taglist : @oscarissac2099 @ayamenimthiriel

[yelena-bellova]

Twenty Years Later: Joel Miller x Reader - One Shot #3

Talking to the Sky

Plot: While doing some gardening, Y/n deals with unpleasant memories.

Word Count: 753

Warnings: loss of a child, ptsd, (16+)

A/N: Miss me? I know it’s been a while but to be honest, fic writing has just not been a priority. But I wanted to finish this one and get it out since I promised to continue this every once and a while. Since we’re all preoccupied again because of award seasons, I thought it was a good time to revisit Rosebud and Joel.

This one’s a bit more sad than the last few, but I really wanted to do one just of Rose dealing with some of her s-it. Hope it’s somewhat enjoyable!!

————

Winter was somewhere in that middle bit. Jackson had weathered the worst of the storms, but the fierce cold hadn’t let up yet.

Y/n cursed her gloves, two times too big for her hands, as she dug up the soil of her backyard. She was attempting to plant a garden, emphasis on attempting. She’d done a fair amount of gardening pre-Cordyceps, but that was purely for pleasure. This had more weight to it.

Those who worked the greenhouses had helped her during their shifts. They’d taught Y/n which plants grew during which seasons, some blooming best in winter and others in the summer. There was a science to it more important than ever to know.

Y/n was planting a medley of vegetables, fruit and herbs. She couldn’t feel her knees anymore, the cold having sept into her joints within minutes. She built a few mounds, burying the seeds below and allowing enough space between piles.

She sat back on her feet, struck by a memory she’d been trying to ignore.

Flower bushes.

The looming warmth of a Texas spring.

Sarah’s laughter.

Dirt under their fingernails.

Y/n sighed, her chest aching from something far sharper than the cold.

Finding Joel in Boston hadn’t been the catalyst to bringing back life to her memories. Sarah had lived in her mind every minute of every day since the girl had left the Earth. Etched in her heart till the end of time. But between settling in Jackson and marrying Joel, living some strange version of the life they’d wanted, it breathed new air into Sarah’s ghost. Sometimes it rendered Y/n speechless, frozen somewhere between the past and the present.

She looked up the sky, the cloud coverage shielding her eyes from the sun.

“You hated when I made you do this,” Y/n spoke to the air, “You never liked getting your hands dirty but you were smiling. The whole time. So there was never much weight to what you said.”

“I remember that time we were planting those flowers in the backyard,” she continued, “Daisies or roses…I don’t really remember, just that they were beautiful when they bloomed that summer. That your dad wouldn’t admit to them prettying up the place because ‘What’s there to pretty up?’”

Y/n chuckled, Joel had never made a big deal about the little changes Sarah and her made to the house. They both knew he secretly liked them and loved the two of them too much to ever say no.

“He’s gotten worse, if you can imagine it,” Y/n looked down at her shovel, wiping some of the dirt off, “If you thought he was bad in the morning then,” she whistled, “But he’s also…better. He’s him.”

Y/n sunk into the snow a little deeper. The cold didn’t matter anymore. “The other day, I caught him humming to himself. He was doing the dishes and I came in from patrol and…it just reminded me of all the times we’d catch him singing and he’d deny it,” she smiled, “We’d literally be standing right there and he’d say it was the fridge or something.”

Her little laugh quieted, turning somber. The sweet memory inevitably turned sad.

“God, I miss you,” Y/n whispered as her throat tightened, “I miss you so much. Everything I do in this house, I keep looking over and expecting you to be right next to me.“

She paused, beginning to feel just a drop of the sun’s distant warmth. “And then your dad comes in or Uncle Tommy and it’s like you’re there. Making us laugh, calling us old…and for two seconds, it feels okay. Not perfect, but alright, and I can get through the rest of the day,” Y/n rubbed her running nose and looked back up at the sky, “Just keep doing that. Don’t ever leave us down here on our own.”

Y/n had long lost track of time since starting her work, and she didn’t hear the front door open. Joel was home from patrol duty. He walked through the empty house, looking more and more like their home each day, looking for someone to greet.

“Rose,” Y/n heard Joel call from inside. She wiped a melancholy tear away and got to her feet.

Taking one more look at the grey sky, she smiled, as if Sarah was radiating her presence down from the clouds. Telling her to get inside and hug her husband. Help make dinner. Make their remote corner of the world a little brighter. Just as Sarah would have.

——————

TYL Taglist: @bachiracore @stolenxkissess @kayleezra @the-wistful-reader @allthesesonsofbitches @goth-detectives365 @trippovert @rh1nestonecowg1rl @emiliaserpe @khaleesihavilliard @frietiemeloen @gracie7209 @dorck26 @thegirlnextdoorssister @alanis-altair @mariwinns16 @whosscruffylooking @endofthexline @alexiaricciardo @eonnyx @pedrosmexicangf @scarlettequinn @ao-sleepy @toinfinityandbeyonce2 @deanlovescassie @turmoil-ash @sorrowjunky @kpopslur @xxlilyxx90 @midgetpottermills @presidential-facts @scoopsnini @tubble-wubble @jamesdeerest @burninggracesandbridges @star-wars-lover @lucyhotchner @cococola-cocaine @witheringhqarts @fall-writes @alwaysdjarin @xxmoonn @emilia-the-artist @wand-erer5 @boneyarrd @lizard-zombie @themultifandomofmadness @cassidylea123 @paleepeaches @mxltifxnd0m @kettlekatie @ultimate-cinephile @gloryekaterina @caramelkatsukis-bitch @whovianayesha @memeorydotcom @deadunicorn159 @get0ut0fmyr00m @siriuslymooned @emmyeed @superbreadsoul @hellu-people1 @ourautumn86 @inas-thing @noraapple05 @givemylovetoall @luvwanda (more tags in comments 🩵)

[ollypopwrites]

Gale x Druid!Tav 🌿 Bonding with Tara

Rating: T (very brief and subtle mention of sex)

Notes: this is v domestic and I love Tara

Tara only gets to meet Tav briefly in the city but she’s known Gale long enough to know that look in his eye

Shes got manners so she’s not rude necessarily but she is stand-offish with Tav because well… she’s protective as much as Gale considers her his most dear and oldest friend he is hers and his mother is hers and he means so much to her

And Mystra well… I have a feeling Tara has some strong opinions on her. so naturally she’s cautious where she thinks he won’t be because he’s earnest and romantic and loves with his whole damn soul

And I talked about it before but! Tav and Gale have only known each other a short time, and they are certainly forged in fire so to speak but from the outside this whole thing looks like fiery whirlwind of feelings and fears of dying or becoming illithid

And Tara has concerns about that: is it going to fizzle out as quickly as it started? Is her Mr. Dekarios going to be left alone again sequestered in his tower? Is this flame going to burn him and leave another scar on his body and soul?

So if Tav accepts gales proposal and goes to Waterdeep Tara is not sure about the whole thing

And tav is… just a bit rugged in the space of Gale’s tower which can get dusty sure, and trinkets and books and quills are always somehow littered everywhere but its not quite the same

Tav’s shoes seem to always be steeped in 6 inches of mud, there’s dirt under fingernails, flowers or leaves in their hair and if Tav isn’t wearing those damned muddy shoes then they’re BAREFOOT and for all intents and purposes Tara feels like Gale found a feral stray animal and decided to bring it into the house

But Gale really enjoys it? He’s ready to renovate the tower so Tav can have a big greenhouse, space for more animals and they’re going on more outings to explore the wildlife around the harbors and beaches and Gale is beginning to sport a lovely tan and Tara isn’t sure she’s ever seen him spend so much time out of the tower but he’s practically glowing and she’s hard pressed not to be pleased he found someone who will literally make him touch grass

And despite being a Druid Tav doesn’t care when Tara hunts little mice and errant birds (which she definitely made a show of dropping small animal carcasses on the windowsill to once Tav nursed some injured bird back to health) but Tav just shrugged cuz circle of life and all that just please none of my pets thank you ms. Tara

She also lingered in the bedroom many a night because she’s a little shit who knows Gale won’t even take off his shirt if she’s there but then they started locking themselves in the bathroom and she flies off to his mothers house the moment she hears bath water start sloshing through the door

She admires the fact that Tav is not put off by Tara’s incredibly forced indifference and tendency to sit between them in the study because well Tav understands nature and she knows sometimes creatures become attached or just simply don’t want you to fuss over them or even touch them and Tara is of course, not a cat but a tressym, but the point still stands and Tav is just not bothered by any of it they’re very happy to simply cohabitate with a disinterested Tara

It isn’t until Tav wildshapes into a cat to sleep in a rare patch of sunlight during the winter that Tara breaks down

She comes over, at first sitting next to Tav and looking at her oddly but Tav just rolls onto her side and continues napping

With the unpracticed grace of a tressym who despite all her higher knowledge and powers loves scratches behind the ears and the spot on the window to watch birds fly by, she flops down to lay with Tav and its… actually quite nice especially when TAV STARTS PURRING.

And it feels nice to cuddle with someone cat-shaped almost, it taps into some far gone memory of piling with family

Thus the winter of snuggles begins where they lay in the sun and play fight and do Cat Things and Tara always flys off if she hears Gale coming around the corner and Tav never tells him about it so she’s spared any teasing and Tav never brings it up ever so as not to embarrass her

Until one day Gale finds them deeeeeeeep in a midday nap but decides not to tell them he found them

And he definitely was not teary eyed about it either that was dust in his eye

[koostattoos]

➳ There’s Only Me When There’s You || j.jk

~ Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

~ Genre: slight enemies to lovers, high school au, fluff, MAJOR angst, first love, young love (Inspired by 2000's film A Walk to Remember by Nicholas Sparks)

~ Summary: Being new was tough. Starting out in a new school and new town without any idea where to go or any friends was tougher. When coming across Jungkook and his friends, school hadn't got any easier. When you get paired with Jungkook for a project your life becomes hell, or was it heaven?

~ Warnings: MAJOR character death, a fight happens, mentions of a hospital, mentions of blood, fluff, fluff, fluff! 190811!jungkook (iykyk), they’re so incredibly adorable i’m crying, use of petnames (mostly baby)

~ teaser word count: 684

full fic here!

This past summer your family moved to a new city. Yongsan was small, that’s what you liked about it. But your family wanted to get away from the big bustling city of Seoul. They thought it’d be better for you. Moving was exciting to you. Being in a new place and all. The house they had bought was small, it had two bedrooms, with a bathroom, and a big enough living space for the three of you.  

The people in the neighborhood were nice. They welcomed you with fresh food and some plants to plant in the mini greenhouse next to the yard. It was very thoughtful of them. Tomorrow is your first day at your new school. You were going into your senior year. They say it’s supposed to be one of the most exciting times in high school.  

After you finish unpacking your things you walk into the living room where your dad was sitting. He was on the phone talking with the moving people to figure out where the rest of your stuff was. And your mom was in the kitchen preparing dinner. You decide to take yourself out of the house and explore the small town you now call home.  

Making sure your parents knew where you were, you turn your head around the corner of the kitchen and call for your mom. 

“I’m gonna go out and look around town, is that okay?”  

“Yeah, sure. Just be careful. Don’t go too far and be back before the sun goes down.” she tells you 

Nodding your head, you turn to put your shoes on and make sure you have your phone with you. The air outside was nice. It was still mid-summer but the weather around this time seemed to cool down.  

When you walk into the village you meet a lot of nice people. Mrs. Kim was the first person you met. “Hi honey. Are you new around here? I don’t think I’ve ever seen your face around here”. She ran one of the local restaurants.  

“No, I’ve actually moved here a few days ago. My family and I live nearby. I just wanted to come in and see what was around here. So, I know somewhat my way around.” you explain to her. She nods her head and gasps as an idea pops up into her head.  

“Well, if you ever need anything, please stop by. I’ll be glad to help” she says to you with a sweet smile.  

“Thank you, Mrs. Kim. I’ll keep that in mind. Have a good night” you smile at her and walk away to explore more of the village. There wasn’t much to do. There were a few bookstores you had walked past and a few other markets. Deciding to head back home you text your mom that you were on your way. Without looking at where you were going you bumped into a firm chest. When you look up, you’re met with a teenage boy. His hair was a bit of a mess but still maintained. He was actually rather cute.  

Before you could say anything, he says, “Are you okay?” you pause for a minute trying to collect your thoughts. He looks blankly at you waiting for you to respond. Finally, after staring at him for what felt like an eternity, you answer him. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m sorry for bumping into you” you bow your head slightly to him as you apologize.  

“It’s alright. Are you new around here? I don’t think I’ve seen you before” you respond the same way you answered to Mrs. Kim. You tell him that you had just moved here a few days ago with your family. He nods his head and excuses himself. But not before he introduces himself.  

“I’m Jungkook by the way.” He has a faint smile on his lips. You tell him your name. “It’s nice to meet you, Jungkook” he nodded and slowly started to walk away. “It was nice to meet you too” Finally, you both bid goodbye to each other and you make your way back home.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not telling my partners I'm a system?

💚🐻

To preface this, I don't use Tumblr and I'm using my partner's account, so I would rather ask this anonymously. Forgive any non-tumblr-isms 😅.

This happened a while ago, but to be honest I can't let this go. I feel so horrible about it despite being reassured and I figured Tumblr, who has a lot of systems/people with DID/OSDD, would be able to give me an unbiased (as much as I can give an unbiased account, anyway) answer.

I, (24M), am a system with one headmate, P, (??). (Neither of us are sure how old he is, since it seems to change on the day). I don't want to get into exactly how I got him, but I believe the term for what we are is "traumagenic"? Sorry, again, I'm not really familiar with everything.

Anyway, I've had him since I was 8, and he's been... well, a real pain in the ass, to be frank. I understand now that he's a defender by nature and was trying to protect us, but when you get expelled from middle school for several physical attacks and almost get sent to juvie you start to resent the guy a bit. He's a bit like a sleeping bear, except if the sleeping bear had one eye open and killed you before you could hurt him.

Back when I got out of my abuser's house and went no contact at age 20, I moved in with my current partners, Bonfire (24M) and Greenhouse (25NB) (names changed for privacy, obviously.) At the time I didn't know them, but they were looking for another roommate and I desperately needed somewhere to live.

So I moved in with just the clothes on my back and my wallet (bad move, I know, but I didn't have anything anyway). I didn't care to interact with them all that much, not wanting P to get defensive and attack them for no reason, but they just kept pushing and eventually I relented and hung out with them some.

"Some" turned to "often," and then "often" turned into "sleeping-in-their-bed-and-sharing-our-clothes." At that point I was too far into it and embarrassed to admit I'd been hiding a whole other person from them in my mind. I wasn't sure if they'd even like me after, what with P's history of violence.

...so I never told them. I did my best to forget about anything that ever happened and tried to just enjoy the future I'd always wanted for myself. Bonfire and Greenhouse are lovely people and I was finally, maybe just a little happy. I'd never been a happy person and I was content to bask in it for as long as I was able.

This, of course, backfired immensely. P and I didn't have the best relationship at the time, with both of us wanting to do very extreme things to get away from the other. He wanted to kick me out and be by himself in my body, and I wanted to kill myself to be rid of him. We've since reconciled and made strides in accepting ourself for who we are- it hasn't been easy by any means, but that isn't the point.

I recognize now that he was afraid of being hurt again, not wanting to get out of that survival mindset in case Greenhouse and Bonfire turned out to be super-secret mega abusers taking advantage of our trust, but I also know what he did after was wrong.

He got physical with Bonfire, screaming at him and threatening to kill him if he got any closer. I don't have any memory of this happening, so some details may be incorrect, and I apologize for that. Bonfire, not knowing that P was not, in fact, me, (coupled with the fact that he's a fucking idiot (meant with affection)), he got closer and tried to talk me (him) down. P punched him in the face and broke his nose, after which he ran out of the house and left me to "wake up" a few miles away curled up under a tree.

P left me a note a few days later that said he didn't mean to break his (Bonfire's) nose, but that he was lucky he hadn't done worse. This, in P speak, is probably the most sincere apology I could get at the time.

To try and keep this as short as possible, I'll summarize what happened next. I told Bonfire and Greenhouse about P because at that point the cat was basically out of the bag. They said they'd wished I'd told them sooner, and that they were a little uncomfortable being in the same house as "the lean, mean, stabbing machine" (- Bonfire) but that they were willing to help me manage him if I promised to tell them everything I knew about how he worked.

I did, and it's been years since then, and now P and I are, as stated before, closer than ever. I recently asked my partners whether or not they were still upset with me for not telling them, and they just said that they weren't entitled to my medical history and trauma (which, yeah, but he did break Bonfire's nose) and that they didn't care because, "hey, we basically got a free dog out of it" (- Bonfire), and "we made a promise to love you, including all the less-than-savory parts." (- Greenhouse).

Sweet, yes, but I think I might be TA because, um, P LITERALLY BROKE BONFIRE'S NOSE AND THREATENED TO KILL HIM? AND IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN PREVENTED IF I HAD TOLD THEM?

TL;DR: I didn't tell my partners about my headmate that's prone to violence and he did violence on them and I feel bad.

AITA?

(P says hi, by the way, and he also wants me to tell you that he isn't like this anymore and much prefers soft blankets and eating fruit to breaking his family's noses.)

What are these acronyms?

[gabessquishytum]

Sneaking back in here to say hi! Glad to see you back and better than ever! Speaking of, I'm back on my usual bull.

Mob/flowershop au?

The New Inn is Hobs pet project. A hybrid between a restaurant and a green house. With vegetables and such being grown in house for the dishes, and flowers for the patrons to by if they want. He's put a lot of time and effort into making it what it is, maybe going to school for both botany and cuisine, so when there are talks of other shops in the area getting shaken down by the local gangs, he's worried about the future of his baby.

Little does he know, the local gang has already been by to shake him down. They thought it was just another restaurant, but the minute they stepped inside they were in awe and too busy admiring the ambiance and enginuity of the place. They report sheepishly to their boss, who has to go in for himself.

Dream is charmed by the atmosphere, care, and quality that went into building such a place, but what really catches his eye is the handsome man who seems to be both host, head chef, AND head gardener. He may not be getting that shake down money any time soon, but at least he has a new place to go where both the food and,,,,,,service,,,,,is impeccable.

I may write more

💳 anon

This is actually so cute, i am genuinely in love with the idea of Dream’s gang just having the best time ever at Hob’s restaurant where they're supposed to be scaring him - Cori scoffs at the idea of vegetables initially but he is RAVING about the food within minutes of sitting down. He and Matthew practically drag Dream to the restaurant and he is admittedly... curious.

For a hot minute Hob thinks that Dream is some hot-shot restaurant critic. But he catches on to the fact the pretty man is mobbed up when he sees the gun strapped to Dream’s thigh. Well, Hob can only hope that the veggies, fruits, flowers and pastoral atmosphere work their magic. Oh and he does have a trick or two up his sleeve...

Dream is enthusiastic amused by the way that Hob flirts with him all evening. Hardly anyone is every bold enough to make a move on Dream. But Hob is smiling and chatting, touching Dream at every opportunity, and perpetually filling up his glass with the wine (which is of course made with Hob’s homegrown grapes). Dream begins to begrudgingly flirt back, and accepts an offer to come and see the greenhouses in the back.

Hob pays his "protection" money in full that evening as far as Dream is concerned. He pushes Dream against the greenhouse and kisses him practically from head to toe before sucking him off. He doesn't even seem bothered by the gun - in fact, he kisses that too. Dream blushes the same colour as Hob’s prize winning tomatoes, and stutters something about how he'll be back. Soon.

Dream gets a gorgeous bunch of Hob’s home grown flowers delivered to his office the very next day. He can't stop staring at them... and thinking about Hob. He'll REALLY have to find some way to stop by the restaurant again already. Not to shake Hob down, but hopefully to shake him out of his clothes...