#if i want to end my hiatus

[echo-and-dust]

now that my brain has somewhat unscrambled itself i have gotten most of my thoughts in order about season 3.

and the first thing i will say is: i loved it.

while it was gutwrenching and polarizing in some ways and i feel that i am entitled to financial compensation for what its done to my mental health, i loved this season for pretty much almost everything it did.

i cannot fault people for having issues with much of the characterization and plot choices made—that’s been the trend during the entire run of the show after all, and imo it’s a testament to the phenomenal way it generates nuance—but i wanted to share my feelings on the recurring opinions i’ve seen about some of these things.

first, i do not blame simon at all for the things he said in the final scene. he’s a child who has been receiving endless verbal and physical harassment on top of all the trauma he is still trying to heal from. he just watched his boyfriend lash out in anger and hurt—while not at him, but it must’ve been a close resemblance of how he might’ve seen micke act. at least, that's what i thought, though i've seen others say otherwise.

and yes, wille is not micke, but just because wille’s source of outbursts is different from micke’s doesn’t mean simon is wrong in drawing similarities. at least he's finally getting a true glimpse into what wille has had to deal with. i've honestly grown to like that they didn't have simon immediately comfort him though; wille's mental illness is not his fault, but it is his responsibility, and instead of pushing a message of unhealthy co-dependence, the show has simon be honest: "but i see that everything hurts you and that hurts me too." and to me, that's so important.

plus, it doesn't make their love any less genuine. wille is a victim of the circumstances; he is not evil, and he is not undeserving of simon. he just has a lot of growing and healing to do, a lot of unlearning and exposure therapy because he's still blinded by privilege even when he tries not to be.

speaking of, i have so many thoughts about wille that i feel like i need to save for its own separate post, but to sum them up: i'll still defend him with my life, and he needs to get the fuck away from that institution.

also, the fact that the responsibility of controlling simon's media decisions was placed solely on wille confused me at first like—why wouldn't they get a professional to give him proper media training?

then i realized, this could be the royal court's way of sabotaging their relationship. they knew that making wille the one to tell simon what he can and cannot say or post would create distance and animosity between them. despite the ramifications of simon's behavior on social media, it seems they still thought it best to have his boyfriend be the one to try to mold him into the system. because they knew that's how they could get rid of him. in conclusion, fuck the royal court (we been knew but still).

one of the standouts this season was their transparency regarding the show's politics. it not only works well with the show's arc (wilmon is public, everything's out in the open now and there's nothing to hide), but also it felt necessary at a time where censorship has been rapidly gaining momentum. it felt so refreshing for these characters to talk so openly about racial discrimination and queerphobia and class disparities, forcing both character and viewer to acknowledge that they exist and you should feel uncomfortable about it.

i don't think i can add much more to what was already said about it—most of the fandom is more eloquent and observant than i am anyway—i just wanted to reinforce how important this season is to myself and the story even with how controversial it is to fans right now. a lot of people may disagree with me and that's fine.

[slavhew]

skirts suit strider

[rainymoodlet]

feelin super-dee-duper normal abt this sim i made for @buglaur's handsome cowpoke...

[crybaby-bkg]

having to look for a publishing company is so daunting omg but I don’t wanna self publish again 😭😭😭😭

[missingn000]

[raayllum]

me, having to constantly remind myself that S5 / 5x08 isn't a culmination, but is just more set up:

[fluffclan]

Moon 10

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

.

[averlym]

[its-hai-time]

Turnabout Light preview :3

[lovecolibri]

Omg yes! I don't understand why this rl has so many people so enamored and jumping ship so quick. He doesn't treat buck any better than TK did(they don't even have the "built up" og BT had!) I don't want to invalidate anyone's Fandom choices but you wouldn't catch me dead shipping them in any way, I actually want better for Buck

Right?! It's wild! Like, I tried when watching s4 to stay neutral on tay kay because of course the misogyny accusations were getting thrown around, and I GENUINELY, hand to god, thought every scene of her being mean to Buck was proof they were not going to get together because it was SO CLEAR how awful she was to him, but hey, that's on me for expecting a satisfying narrative from a tv show. You would think RNM had taught me better. But it had been a hot minute since I had seen s2 and I immediately was reminded that no, it's okay to be a hater and to think it makes zero sense to put someone like that with Buck (making HIM look bad for even wanting anything to do with her after nearly getting Bobby killed). And then to not even lean into the drama of the firefam calling out her shitty behavior, or noticing Buck looked fucking miserable, or even letting Athena be petty about letting that woman into her and Bobby's home?! To not even allow Buck to be pissed for the breakup and let it end amicably?? To turn him into a cheater?! Jail.

ANYWAY

Evan Buckley deserves better and HAS better in his life already. Let's goooooo Timmy! We're burning daylight!

[dazais-crab-addiction]

Guys guys guess what!!! I'm still struggling with health issues and writing takes a lot of effort I just don't have the energy for. But some friends decided it could be fun to do a little fanfic/fanart collab. And it's just a silly casual thing so its okay that it will take me a really long time. So im gonna be working on an enby Dazai fic that will get fanart with it!!!! I'm really excited. I hope it turns out good. This will be the first project I'm working on since I went of hiatus and im worried it will escalate my issues again but im going to try anyways. Wish me luck!!!!

[fairestwriting]

Ahem.by the way this is the guy of the month. if you care

[jaz-it-up]

me watching everyone i follow get multiple asks every time they reblog an ask game while it takes me two or three attempts to even get one

[daily-linkclick]

oh shit its been at least half a year of daily link click doodles 😳

[oldestking]

Sometimes I ponder the idea of going back to a single blog, like,, not in the sense of leaving my currently active multi behind, or Gil behind, but like, that craving of having a new muse, that has their own space,, it feel like I haven't have that in some time already (and to those who know me, it's nothing unusual to find 844738382 blogs following u which are all mine OTJRPRJTRK)