#if something isnt explicitly stated as a joke or if its not from the fucking onion

[maaaxx]

I think it's important to remember that not only is it important to tag things with 'unreality' (or something similar) for people who struggle with delusions and paranoia, but also people (and by people i mean myself) who are way too gullible for the internet.

[likeadog]

the barbie movie like. ok so [spoilers and long paragraphs under the cut]

yeah it was really basic ideologically it didnt cover all the various intersections and theories of feminism but i think when people saw conservatives flipping their shit people expected it to be like, a manifesto. its a film, and more importantly, it's the Barbie Movie. i think expecting a gender and womens studies class from it would be silly, and while i get why people are disappointed in how much sympathy it lends to the men in the movie, i dont think like, once again, that was ever something to not expect?

furthermore on that point i think showing misogyny from a place of defining the self around a sense of loneliness by men isn't...far off. theres never an excuse for misogyny but thats rhetoric that radicalizes a lot of incels and shit i would rather that than they treat it like some mysterious miasma.

also, i think, once again while it was pretty basic in the ideas it presented... how often is it show that explicitly in broad-audience film? like stated directly to the audience in that manner? theres no flirting with the feminist theory in the movie; it says it outright, which is something a lot of films shy away from out of fear of alienating men once it becomes too "girl power"-y. im not usually for the use of a lot of buzzwords in film and discussion of issues but these buzzwords are never said with cheapness or to obfuscate. it could be heavyhanded at times, but that heavyhandedness wasnt ever really obnoxious? it walked the line of "haha silly" but still took its point seriously enough that you could appreciate the use of that heavyhandedness for comedic effect without being mocked

i also think the fact they just like "solve" the patriarchy in the barbie world isnt meant to imply that you can just fix the real world with a woman president or by being aware of misogyny. in fact a lot of the movie is dedicated to showing how the barbie world and real world are different. the conclusion of the movie is that barbie wants to become human, even though the human world is messy and unsolved and nothing like she assumed it was. she believed barbie had solved misogyny forever, which is a direct jab at the idea that any "one thing" or "girl power" movement can just suddenly whisk away the very power structures that created that sort of oppression.

its very much coming from a cis/heterosexual/white basis. they flirt with further intersection but dont commit, which im really not a fan of. my friends after the film were like "it was more homoerotic than i expected haha" and...yeah, it was, but it didnt do anything to address gayness or what that means in such a heavily gendered heterosexual society. you could read that subtext through allen and his thing.... but allen is a joke. his story is never resolved. hes one of the guys but he isnt, hes one of the girls but he isnt, he benefits not at all from "kendom" but conversely is not oppressed the way the barbies are and vice versa. he's just allen, and the only allen there is. when sasha and her mom want to go back to help barbie, the fact he just goes "God im never getting out of here" and thats just like, left was kinda. well. it was something for sure.

still. i know i just wrote like 200 words on the ideology of this movie but first and foremost its a pg13 comedy meant to be shown to broad audiences in theaters for money. its meant to be an enjoyable watch, and it is! its a gorgeous film, its funny, the songs are fine, and the way it makes its side comments arent distracting nor meanspirited. it knows when to take itself seriously, and i like that. i was actually expecting it to be a general audiences like, kids movie i was so fucking surprised when barbie said penis.

i also think saying the line at the end about the gynecologist is like "saying you need a vagina to be a real woman" is disingenuous honestly. one its meant to be a bit of a shock quip to get a giggle but two i think a lot of people who need gynecological care (which can include trans women) are afraid when it comes to that first visit and finally sitting down and talking about those areas because of the shame and lack of proper education. maybe its bc i grew up mormon but i dont think its meant to imply thats what MADE barbie a real woman or that its fundamental to being one.

once again it definitely isnt a perfect movie. i think the way the ken and barbie talk happened at the end was still a bit coddly and the scope of the ideology underneath the movie was, once again, still very much centered in white cishetero society and thought with only passing mentions of intersectionality that felt both shallow and (especially with the gayness and racial dynamics) occasionally like it was being turned into a joke

still all in all it was a pretty good movie. weird barbie #1. allen get behind me i will protect u

[closetdbisexual]

barry being autistic is just really funny to me its like a joke but also the idea of him being real rep is very special to me too i have talked about this a lot SORRY i like discussing it . i like saying things . barry as an undiagnosed adult makes perfect sense because obviously john sr. and fuches would not know or understand any of that and would not bother to really look into it further than "hes shy" -> "hes depressed" . and also him being genuinely really dumb when the mainstream Consumerized autistic character has to be exctremely smart and catty and quick-witted and sarcastic . they have to still function in society and still be extremely intelligent to make up for it and theyre obsessed with science and cars and whatever the fuck . <- i know there are characters who arent like this in media but i specifically am talking about the MainStream CONSUMERIZED form of quirky cute uwu autism thats gotten popular the past few years . the kind where all you have to do is be a bit awkward and be a bit obsessed with something . while barry is sincerely dumb and doesnt understand simple questions and doesnt comprehend relationships and is so gullible and so stupid and the only "skill" he has that "makes up for it" is the skill that also results in him being alienated and In fact is a trait we as the viewer dislike him for . barry being awkward and nervous and oblivious is a very specific part of his personality most noticeable in s1 but as time goes on and he starts to seem more "normal" it can still be viewed as masking via the scenes where his "mask" (version of himself he tried to build) cracks and hes just as awkward and weird and oblivious again . his behavior from tricky legacies to the wizard is one specific moment of that to me . functionally hes a "savant" in that hes extremely dumb with one specific skill/interest that hes exceptionally talented/knowledgeable about. though i dont know if id consider that FULLY because he isnt like. his special interest isnt guns lol but he does have lots of odd little fixations and traits and those fixations are also heavily linked to his PTSD and father issues/abandonment issues and his need for validation . well anyways barry being very messy and fucked up and flawed and his mental illnesses/disorders contributing to it and they create lots of real long-term problems in his life which , though exaggerated or shown in different metaphorical ways, can be very accurate to what real people w/ those illnesses/disorders and even real veterans and survivors of war and stuff go through . but even then we get direct proof that barrys awkwardness and shyness wasnt caused BY the war or by john sr. or fuches because he was already like that as a child. and also i just like to use him as an example of how things can be canon by being inferrable and implied in the text without having to be directly stated . you make a character who is extremely awkward, terrible at relationships, cannot understand tone, rhetorical questions, or metaphors, who is extremely gullible to the point it gets him into serious trouble SEVERAL times , and who is finally again i keep bringing up the rain man comparison AGAIN he is compared to raymond from rain man, possibly the most well-known autistic character (and movie related to that) in america i would think . so like . at that point its canon without them having to explicitly state it at all . what was the point of this. oh barry is just good representation of a severely mentally ill person and a good commentary of how society and organizations can fail mentally ill people . and sally also i would like to talk about sally one day but i need to rewatch early s4 for that probably .... . i am very mentally ill and i like talking about how it can be shown in media (thumbs up emoji) . i dont know if any of these words form a coherent sentence

[meetthesoldier]

hi sorry this is outta nowhere but i would love to hear ur thoughts on harry (phone

SORRY ANON I LEGIT FORGOT ABT THIS ASK and im too lazy to draw her fr so heres some fanart i drew of her dying in a glue trap

this time i have a bit more thoughts on her as an actual character so ill start w that before the headcanon dump ... also, throughout this post ill be referring to her w she/her pronouns because of a personal headcanon im VERY attached to. all i ask is any rbs or further questions abt my specific vision of her use those same pronouns... in others posts i do not care obviously. also, this post is specifically abt her in the dsaf universe since shes far more substantial there.

firstly, i should say i ADORE harry. she is one of my biggest comfort characters in a series where almost everybody is one for me. so when i give any criticisms, know its out of love and a wish for some more expansive writing rather than any malice. being critical of media you love is important, etc etc.

my biggest issues with her character really boils down to the lack of acknowledgement abt her being physically disabled. she mentions having a "bad leg" during 3, but its ONLY mentioned that one time, during (i believe) missable dialogue. i understand her not using, like, mobility aids for it since it may be difficult to find suitable stock images (+ all the phonies in that game use the same photos for their bodies, and its totally possible its not something she feels she needs), but it probably shouldve been mentioned or expanded upon more.

i dont believe were given any explanation on how her leg ended up the way it is, or in what way it is. we dont know if she was born with her disability or aquired it later. we dont know if its paralyzed, we dont know if its because of a muscular dystrophy, or anything else. i just wish we were given more info, bcus as it is, it is REALLY easy to look over in favor of, say, her ptsd.

speaking of which, i have some mixed feelings on how her ptsd is portrayed. on one hand, the joke in the restaurant reviews abt her having flashbacks and a subsequent panic attack feels very distasteful, though thankfully this is (i believe) the only instance of this kind of joke at her expense. im glad elsewise it isnt some huge , controlling part of her character - however, again, it IS missable. while one can assume she has it when she discusses her past, i dont believe its explicitly stated UNTIL that review.

tldr; her disability feels poorly handled, mostly from lack of expansion and discussion.

thankfully, though, she is elsewise a very enjoyable character; shes got some really good and funny dialogue, the exposition we get from her about the original managers is really fucking good, and i really wish we heard more abt her experience working with rebecca (and presumably roger)... again, her biggest issues are just not having as much of a spotlight on her as she couldve, but considering the employees arent really the main focus of the game that may be fine actually...

(as an aside, i think about this post every day and cry audibly.)

thus ends the longform musings, onto the silly headcanons;

standard fare queer headcanon dump: trans woman + demisexual lesbian. also, polyamorous. fuck yeah baby steak (ref)

was in a queerplatonic relationship with joe while he was alive, and a romantic one with both tango/terrence (who has some gender fuckery going on as well) and rebecca because i am not immune to homemade lesbianism.

has ptsd in canon, but im adding a "c" in front of that cause aint no way she lived through all of her coworkers (and presumably FRIENDS) dying in such horrific ways and was only affected in the short-term.

autistic! specifically also has the thing i do where i need the time to be a multiple of 5 before i can start doing anything. also has generalized anxiety i think, with a tendency to catastrophize and compensates by insisting to herself everything is toootally fine. definitely NOT going to have a breakdown rn because shes not totally sure that that vending machine is 100% not going to fall on her specifically

probably didnt have many friends as a kid (L) so now she overcompensates by trying to be as charming and polite as possible. wether or not this works in her favor or makes her seem pretentious is a coinflip. (its certainly working on me though!)

has a real soft spot for random niche animals. probably a big salamander and gecko girl. her favorite is the marbled salamander because its cute as hell

slightly off topic everyday i think of how fucking horrific it mustve been for joe to come into work one morning and his best friend just has a phone for a head and extreme memory issues now . literally what the fuck. thats so fucked up

to do a tonal 180... if she was a pokemon trainer shed have a herdier or stoutland as a sort of service dog for walking shorter-medium distances when she rlly doesnt feel like whipping out the cane :.-)

shes so pale its actually ridiculous. bro looks like she hasnt seen the sun in 5 years ... jake pokes a bit of fun for it sometimes

thanks for asking, anon! i love getting excuses to talk about dsaf. i have a lot of thoughts, you know... dont ever friend me on discord my ass will randomly drop either the goofiest or angstiest headcanons at random intervals and i have no real control over whichor when it will be

[angeloncewas]

yeah i totally agree with what you said about satire and schlatt basically taking the easy way out. it seems like since that video he's kinda eased back from doing that shit, either bc the backlash or bc his friends have started verbally calling him out on it, both to his face and through making comments about him on stream (comments as in like saying they dont agree with what he did and saying they thought that video was terrible, not like them shading him or whatever ajsksk) which is good but also i wouldnt be surprised if something like that video happened again just bc like. it is his career and at this point he has to know what his larger fanbase is like to an extent, which means he also knows those terrible fucking jokes will make him money. i dont like that, but im also not gonna sit around and pretend like i cant see the fucking obvious, ya know? from what ive seen of him when he's not putting on a show for his main channel, or when he isnt around people who both encourage and enable his bad behavior (not saying this to shift blame, ive just noticed how he goes from making actually funny jokes that are harmless or, at most, a pretty obvious example of him poking fun at shitty people, at least imo, to like. straight up just being offensive when he's with people like swagger, miz, etc. vs ted, charlie and so on), he seems like a pretty good guy and its pretty clear to me that he doesnt hold the same views as the character he plays up for his main channel but that doesnt change the fact that his audience is now full of the worst kinds of people and that is how he makes money.

as someone who, again, watched idubbbz, as well as filthyfrank, they both stated they were playing characters and they didnt agree with the shit they were joking about, joji especially, but them saying that isnt very well known by even their own fanbase who just watches their main channel stuff, bc the one video where joji made that explicitly clear what he was doing, he later deleted for people harassing him in the comments (it was an old ass video where he basically said that playing those characters was giving him literal health problems, specifically stress induced seizures, and his comments were so bad that he never made an ooc video on his main channel again) and the one video i can think of where ian explicitly said he was playing a character was like an hour long podcast with h3, which most people dont even wanna watch bc it is a painfully uncomfortable one hour, considering the fact that they are supposed to be friends. besides that, the only other time they were really out of character was in vlogs with maxmoefoe, and they still did their offensive bits from time to time bc it was still going up on youtube, even if it wasnt their main channel. compare that to schlatt who has, as far as i know, never explicitly said he's playing a character, and the closest he has gotten to saying that was in some weekly slap video that i cant remember the title of bc all those videos kinda blend together if im being honest. like they definitely show a different, better side of him, but they are also all really short videos with only gameplay to watch and he never even promotes the channel, so its not like the shitty people watching him are like "hm time to take some time out of my day to go watch big man schlatt give people advice and be a genuine person for once", right?

idk. schlatt is just such a weird person for me bc like. he is a big comfort for me, i really do enjoy his content when he's not making bad stabs at satire (bc sometimes he does it right!! but a lot of the time, at least recently, he has just missed the mark entirely, to the point where it feels like he wasnt even trying to hit the mark at all), but he is also so uncomfortable to watch sometimes just bc he seems to either not know where the line is, or thinks crossing it is okay bc its him playing a character and that's not fun to watch as a minority who often ends up being apart of that "punchline".

that aside tho...yes, unfortunately idubbbz does still make content (and i say unfortunately bc it is not very good) though it seems like he is very slow to upload and last i checked, the views arent too great, but ive seen worse. probably the only thing that could bring back his views at this point would be a content cop, but like a year or so back he said he has no plans of continuing the series bc he finds it boring now, which is fair enough. i dont really keep up with him anymore, but as far as i know, he just got married to anisa and he streams on twitch sometimes, besides that the dude is a mystery to me!

—🦷 (also im sorry if this is formatted weird, for whatever reason tumblr has indented each of my paragraphs with one of those grey line thingys and it wont let me remove it. if it doesnt show up in the actual ask then ignore this!)

This is kind of old now (sorry), but I still wanted to respond because I really appreciate your perspective :)

> I always wonder how people not involved in the fandom view Schlatt. Because wasn't there this thing about Hasan genuinely thinking that he was conservative? And like he obviously doesn't now, but does that not impact how he sees him and his content? I don't mean to dictate friendships - of course - I'm just curious as to the impact of having that audience from an outsider pov. I remember being shocked what that thing happened with the pdp fan, but I later found that many people weren't because they knew the nature of the audience he cultivated; maybe I'm just stupid, I had no idea. (Not that Schlatt and pdp are the same, it's just a loose comparison.)

> No one should face harassment, but I doubt Joji deleting that video helped his case. (I mean ig it worked out in the long term considering everything that happened with his music, but yk.) I'm very sorry for the health problems he faced with the characters themselves though. I don't know much about him but that sounds awful.

> I have thoughts on The Weekly Slap, but I think they make me sound bitter and don't add much so just know that they're there ajfdkjdf. I will say that he doesn't seem like "Jschlatt" in them, and moreso just a guy. I know that he quit it for a number of reasons and one of them was not being comfortable with that kind of connection in relation to his increasing fame, but honestly I think his complete dislodgement from his fanbase isn't healthy either.

> I mean, I get it. I've watched a lot of content from a lot of people - ranging from kind of unpleasant to very unsavory - and it's kind of a weird feeling with YouTube and Twitch stuff. Idk it's like - when I go to the grocery store, I'm not wondering if the guy checking my things out is a racist. When I see a commercial, I don't wonder if that guy advertising chicken nuggets is a secret creep. But with content creation of this kind, it's just a weird thought in the back of my mind. I don't know if this makes sense lmao

> Weird that Idubbz finds content cop "boring." I guess the formula is kind of stale and half of the content was the edge, but it seems like the kind of thing that'd be perfect to capitalize off of around now. Cool that he got married... I think. I mean if he's happy ???

> Don't mind the formatting, and sorry to respond like WAY past when this conversation was relevant T_T. I read it right away but the timing got off with actually being able to type stuff out.

[300iqprower]

I found the Schindler’s List of video games. No I’m not joking.

Okay kinda, look i wrote a mini thesis when i found out TLOU2 deadass won GOTY, which is absolutely hilarious cause it’s beyond even my expectation, I didn’t expect them to give it the full RDR2 treatment, btw I picked a very good year to wizen up to the fact TGA is basically a circlejerk and the popular vote has no influience on the outcome [[So apparently its Golden Joystick which actually is people voted. “Gamers” really are just the definition of “Fuck you, Got Mine” and I hope everyone who voted for Naughty Dog under any circumstance has to work retail crunch until they learn empathy.]] BUT ANYWAYS I genuinely wrote the following out of interest, not anger. In fact I cant wait for all the people to explode because they still dont realize the game awards are a sham.  this is ALL off the cuff, be warned, cause I basically rambled to friend about having stumbled onto a thesis prompt, I cut out the first half of it for that reason so here goes:

So then.

this entire thing?

It proves that "critics" don't actually want video games to be video games. They don't want video games to be art either. They just want video games to be movies

Writing is not a universal constant, because every medium tells stories in different ways

Do you judge the writing of a book the way you judge the writing of a movie? Does the fact a book wont have voice actors or background music make it movies but worse? of course not

so why do people keep acting like that's how it works for video games?

A video game will never, NEVER be able to be as well written as a high tier film, not in terms of pure standalone writing. The same way a movie will never be as well written as a book in terms of pure standalone writing.

Undertale is probably the best written game ever made. the writing isn't remotely as good as a B grade movie

because in a movie writing and acting are how you tell the story. That's its strength

Video games have a different. fucking. strength: GAMEPLAY

When you think of "art" in video games, what comes to mind?

Maybe Shadow of the Colossus? Undertale? Braid? Journey? These all work.

And ya know what they have in common?

They are not "cinematic" and they are not "masterpieces of writing and acting”

in fact of those 4 games, 3 don't actually have dialogue unless you seriously count those messages from Dormin

You know what they all have in common though?

They don't use writing to convey their story, messages, themes, etc. They use gameplay

Movies treat videogame qualities to be detrimental in a film. people attribute this to contempt. It isn't those people who say a movie being like a video game is bad? they are absolutely right.

And in that Exact. Same. Vein. VIdeo games shouldn’t be actively trying to be like movies

not if they want to be anything more than a B movie

Let’s just start with several examples of different ways video games create “artistic” narrative and experiences:

Shadow of the Colossus tells its story by having you realize that your actions as the player have unleashed a terrible evil. Braid sets its time travel gameplay mechanic in reverse at the end for its big story reveal. Journey has zero dialogue and through the way you traverse environments alone tells a grand epic. Undertale applies the idea of metanarrative to video games in a way unlike any other, something plenty of movies have done but no movie has ever been able to do to an even remote degree that Undertale did, because unlike a film the audience has direct input. Does that make metanarrative films like Fight Club, Inception, or far more historically famous than, either, a “Citizen Kane” type film if you’re gonna bring that stupid notion out, Sunset Boulevard, does that make it bad metanarrative? NO. IT MEANS ITS A DIFFERENT VERSION OF THAT STYLE.

Bastion is dialogue heavy, with constant narration, so is stanley parable, but both games have that narration dictated by the player's action. In a movie narration can only dictate predetermined action, even if that means unreliable narration or outright lying in the narration, that won't change the fact what it describes is predetermined because it's a movie. In a game, it could be different every single time.

There are far more examples of artistic games that are art specifically because they arent trying to be art in the same sense as a movie

Papers Please for example

THAT could genuinely be equivalent to Schindler's List

Because you are deciding who lives and dies, you TECHNICALLY aren't, but you know what happens to the people you deny. You know exactly what will happen to them.(edited)

so do you let them in even if it's not legal, deducting your own pay and making it that much more likely you can't afford food or heat that night for your family? or do you send them knowingly to the gulag?

In a film that already is a powerful message and like I said it genuinely isnt that far off from schindler's list. As a movie done right, papers please could be a harrowing story about those kinds of things. But it wouldn't be any better, nor would it likely be told in a way remotely similar to how you experience games.

because again: they. are. different. mediums.

That's what it means to have different mediums, you can tell the same story in completely different ways to elicit different, equally meaningful responses

In schindler's list what makes it harrowing is that its a man who was on his way to wealth who is sacrificing that wealth and his own safety to save the lives of innocents being persecuted

the emotional response is from seeing how Oskar Schindler deals with the situation he's ended up in and whether he has the resolve to save those people or if he would sell them out to secure his own prospects

In Paper's Please it's not even close to the same

You have no idea how grand scale the things going on are, you only have bits of info to piece together with the only context given being you are a border patrol guard who will serve your authoritarian "country"

There's a game called Not Tonight that has the same gameplay but gets these details wrong

it makes the resistance obviously the good guys, there's little to no penalty to helping them over the state.

in that aspect its MORE like Schindler's list because obviously the nazis are the bad guys

so why isn't the comparison Not Tonight and Schindler's List?

because the idea of a straightforward story where you know sheltering them is good and its bad to sell them out is part of film storytelling, where you are an onlooker

In Papers Please the way you're torn between what to do and who is worth saving and who isn't, whether you should back resistance or serve the state? That struggle you as the player feel is the struggle Schindler's List puts on screen for you to OBSERVE, not to be a part of.

Not Tonight in terms of its story and writing is more similar to Schindler's list. And that's why it's explicitly less artistic than Paper's Please. *Because if you make a game more similar to a movie, you lose the strengths of the medium of games without actually gaining the strengths of the medium of film.*

[findingyouagain]

personal rant down below. pls feel free to ignore

apparently asking my mom to stick up for me when my sister starts yelling at me about stupid things like accidentally spilling a drink upstairs, putting a sweatshirt on top of the dresser to block the box lights, her yelling at me over having a fan plugged in & on downstairs is “not something we need to talk about” & “your dad & i are working with av. on her anger” ( um bitch where she’s upstairs all the time & you bitches are downstairs 24/7. what are you having telepathic conversations about her anger issues ??? & yes im at the house all the time so its not like its happening when im not around ) & “you & kar. are out to get avery & get her into trouble & that’s why you keep bringing up old stuff” ( no we keep bringing up old shit bc if i had broken a door in this house i would have to pay to fix it & have all my shit taken away from me ).

also apparently when getting into heated discussions about the severity of covid-19, racism & how making jokes about stereotypes is racist, & other “political” issues ( aka human rights issues ), me pulling out articles & quoting scientific fact is “handling it wrong & attacking them” & my mom literally said she just shuts up & stops listening to me bc she doesnt want to hear it aka she’s not open to having her opinion changed on anything so y’know Fuck all of the kids who might die bc we have to open the schools back up & fuck their family members who might get sick if they bring it home & all the teachers & our schools arent eve requiring kids to wear masks just the teachers. & my other two sisters are going back to uni next month & one of them keeps fucking complaining about having to wear a mask & she fucking cheered the other day bc her school isnt in one of the counties in our state w/ mask requirements so when she has to go to this stupid sorority thing that they could do over fucking zoom next weekend, she’s just gonna be out there exposing herself & others to whatever fucking germs she has & im just so fucking tired.

& even my youngest sister was backing my mom up & was like “its just arguing all sisters dont get along all the time” & im like no av. has been physically & emotionally abusive to me & made me feel like i dont deserve any of the space or air i take up in our shared room the past 7 years & y’all are just mad that kar. & i are sitting here quietly & putting up with it anymore. & then she said “you just have to let it go & move on & like forgive her &  giver her a second chance” like no bitch this is her like 15th chance, im done. im so fucking done. but i cannot move out ?? bc i dont have a car. & i dont have money for a car or an apartment & i have no fucking friends & every person who is ‘supposedly’ my friend from home or school & shit, it’s always me who has to reach out first. always. & im tired of not feeling needed or wanted. but then oh why havent you done the dishes or the towels now im crying upstairs after ls or vacuumed or cooked yet. & when i do those things & ask for help from my sisters it’s well you’re not our parents & you cant tell us what to do.

& its my dads fucking bday & i spent the day making him a cake ( his family’s recipe meaning i had to call his parents who constantly harass me about my weigh t& my clothes & my hair & theyre racists homophobic assholes who i will never come out to but cant fucking cut out of my life yet bc i still live at home w/ my dad & bc their other son is supposed to be helping me get a car & bc they had to cosign my student loans last year & they told me i ha to watch what i eat as the stipulation for them signing & also they fucking guilt trip me anytime i spend more than a couple days not talking to them & explicitly try to make me feel bad that i enjoy the company of my mom’s parents more ) & now im upstairs crying bc i got into it w/ my mom while he & av. went to go pick up the pizza which is the only reason i brought it up.

oh not to mention the text btwn my mom & dad that i accidentally saw where they explicitly said kar & i implied we wanted av. to be put under a 72 hr psych hold as if asking that she be held accountable for her actions & not throw toothbrushes at us & shit is the same thing as that ??

so in case you were wondering no quarantine is not holding up great i fucking wish i could move out already but thats not gonna happen for probably a year & idk what to do i just need my own place so i can have space again & not feel like im constantly in it w/ 4-5 other people.

[shattered-catalyst]

So this  isnt for anything other than just to say what happened just so I feel heard and I can explain why I cant be as energetic and socially active on here. Its not a callout post or to be reblogged/shared by people. Its not to get anyone in trouble or to cause any reaction. It’s just for me to let it out and reclaim this space again. Its been a year since it happened and I guess I’m just still noticing how badly it has impacted my PTSD. How much its changed me as a person both online and off, and this isnt a woe as me thing either this is just me feeling a need to be heard and explain my own behavior over the year and also to make one simple request of you guys: no matter what you do, always treat your rp partners as people first and writers second.

Because I feel myself becoming bitter and that isnt who I am and I dont want to be someone like that. Or like this. I want to be me again

The person who did this wont be named mainly because they dont deserve it and yall dont need to know. Their behavior when I confronted them more than cements the impression that they dont see any harm in what they said and how they reacted. And again this isnt about them though In A Way I suppose it is? it takes two to tango but it takes one to encourage someone to kill themselves.

This is going to be long because I need to inform on the activity that lead up to this  because it didnt just happen over night- though in a way it did. But you need a better picture of this person because apparently they present a really great face that only a few of us see the manipulative and toxic side of.

This person was always very judgemental and hyper critical. I witnessed a lot of very negative and toxic behavior from them but I was naive and just hoped they would mature as they grew older and gained more independence. I thought it was just a toxic friend group and that perhaps she would recognize her self destructive and immature behavior and grow from it. 

My first red flag should have been when they accused me of being their ex girlfriend SOLELY because I was living in PA. I hate to break it to yall, but PA is a big ass state and has a lot of comic book loving ladies. Thankfully I have never met this person IRL and I hope I never do.

They tried to pull me into making fun of other muns on discord, including mocking sensitive pictures from a mun’s personal blog. I blatantly said it wasnt okay and made me uncomfortable and she continued laughing and making jokes about it with her friend group on discord. She kept trying to pull me into it no matter how often I tried to change the subject.

Her group of friends also did this thing where one of them would go interact with a mun an they would take screenshots of the convo and share it with the group and mock the mun they were interacting with. Whether it be their presentation of character/grahics/writing style/ etc.

The other red flags I ignored? How much she complained and mocked other muns and compared them to me; if anyone did anything or said anything she disagreed with it was an instant blow up. She took EVERYTHING personally including other people writing the same characters she did, having differing headcanons, not knowng obscure details about canon, etc.

She once tried to make fun of a new writing partner I had who was writing the same character, and I had to break it to her that this new person could write in her first language if she wanted to; im being very vague but let me just say if you and your character have the same first language and you want to write in it then its completely WRONG for a white mun to try and make fun of you for it.

She once suggested I had stolen pictures off her pinterest when she sent me a moodboard request for my character. Jokes on her I didnt even know she HAD a pinterest and I had gotten all my pictures from the ‘green aesthetic’ tag on tumblr. Which I told her but she kept pushing the idea on me I had stolen them. I of course dismissed this and put it on the back burner despite the alarm bells going off.

This hyper critical and paranoid behavior continues with everything from other canon blogs making similar head canons/ vaguely similar graphics/ to fanfiction authors having similar head canons/plot ideas.

My penname Citrus? I didnt want one. I didnt want it. She demanded I have a pen name and if not she was going to call me Cat. Now as yall know I dont like being enmeshed with my muse so I keep myself separate from them. I didnt like being called Cat and I told her that explicitly. She kept doing it. So I had to make a pen name because she refused to respect my boundaries.

When the Deadpool movie came out she DEMANDED I change my FC to reflect the movie Despite Not Changing Hers to reflect her own characters new look - which might i add is fat erasure. It was clear then that the rules and standards she held other people to didnt apply to herself. I was labeled problematic for not giving into her demands to change FCs (which I have a literal logical reason for not changing and im not explaining that here)

So I shouldve left. Long story short I didnt because every friendship I’d been in until around this time had been abusive and toxic. I thought this was all normal behavior for people to have and I was convinced I was just being critical of someone elses opinions/ insensitive etc. Thanks to my colleagues in graduate school and to several of you on here I learned that ‘hey dumbass friends dont treat your ass like this’.

Im leaving a lot out about the shit she did/said to me but those snippets give you an idea of things.

Leading up she decided to leave fandom and asked we didnt talk about marvel I said cool okay and didnt talk about marvel with her. If I did I would ask first if she was okay if we talked about one small aspect I thought might excite her/ she would like to know about but it wasnt often that happened because she began ghosting me. Hard. She stopped replying to me at all over discord when I would try and talk to her how we used to about our lives. She didnt answer any asks for munday or character development, in fact she blatantly ignored me.

I checked in a couple times with her to make sure I hadnt done anything to make her uncomfortable and she said no. May I emphasize she said no here. Im emphasizing it right now. She said no. She said everything was fine. So when I was like hey dude this is super triggering for me can you send me like a hi every once in awhile just so I can know we’re okay because its super triggering for me. Yall know what she did? She ‘lmao’-ed. she thought that was hecka funny. Yeah triggering ‘Citrus’ is hilarious isnt it? No it isnt and I shouldve cut her ass off right then and there.

Heres where shit gets confusing: she kept fucking talking about marvel to me. Id get messages at random times about marvel and then silence for weeks. I vividly remember during this period I was cleaning the museum vault and she kept messaging me about her marvel fc’s and how she wouldnt get a plotline and how characters were wrong etc.

I remember being REALLY confused because she had said NO MARVEL. But here she was bitching at me about marvel. In fact thats all she did when she did talk to me. Which was only like three or four times during the ghosting time period. She’d bitch about marvel and then vanish.

Shed make claims about not watching her dash and thats why she never responded to me/ interacted with me. She’d say she wasnt talkng to anyone while I see her on the dash TALKING TO PEOPLE and Id like to point out Ive told her I would be fine ending anything as long as she let me know.

but she followed me on every blog and throughout this time period she made and followed me on numerous ones. She kept reaching out sporadically to bitch about her fcs/how horrible marvel was/ and thats it. 

It was extremely confusing because if someone doesnt want to talk to me I assume they will; 1. unfollow 2. block 3. say goodbye 4. ghost and stay ghosted.

Not cycle through behavior rapidly. I asked her a few times if we were good and that I was confused and I got another ‘lmao’ reaction so I assumed we were good. At this point I still have no idea what was going on/ what message I was supposed to be receiving other than confusion.

So following this is heavily suicide tw and I encourage you not to read this part and to scroll down until the suicide tw is over which is highlighted in bold- if you’re triggered by that because I care about those who follow my blog.

So thats when this shit happened. I had tried reaching out to her on a different fandom platform to try and maintain the friendship. Because she said numerous times that we were friends. So like I reached out thinking maybe she just didnt want a marvel blog period.  It wasnt too long after that that she suicide baited me.

I was in a really bad place and had been for awhile and when I posted about how the only thing holding me on was the new comic coming out and specifically said “im seriously suicidal and this comic is the only thing giving me hope #idk what to do anymore ”. I was surprised when she liked the post.

I was three steps into a four step plan. I had everything but the method planned out and was just waffling along with that. Because yknow its complicated and you do it you make it count amiright. Right. I was in a fucked up place. I had just realized I was gay, I was horrendously depressed, I was in considerable physical pain, I was working 70 hours a week, my OCD was at an all time high and the only thing that kept me on this earth was a fucking comic book. You hold onto what you need to yknow?

WELL APPARENTLY NOT

Because this person who doesnt read her dash? This person who doesnt want to talk about anything? Liked that post where I specifically stated I was suicidal and sent me a discord message saying “dont have hope”.

Thats all it said “dont have hope”

Now I know what youre thinking but hold on because it gets worse.

I said something about being confused I dont really remember because I was pretty out of it. I do remember she kept going on about how horrible the comic would be and that it would be a piece of trash. I remember telling her I was really numb and in a bad place and couldnt feel anything. I remember her sending me screencaps and continuing to go ON AND ON about how it wasn’t worth reading.

I remember with gross intensity how someone who said they were my friend was taking away the only thing that was keeping me alive.

I dont remember how the conversation ends. I called out of work for the next three days. I was catatonically depressed and unable to really move. I didnt eat either. I went to internship, work, and school in a state of dissociation.

 I took screencaps of everything and set them aside for later. IDK what I was going to use them for but I set them in a folder on my desktop, looking back I regret what I did next; because I deleted them. I deleted them because I thought maybe she had been manic or drunk and hadn’t realized the scope of what was happening. I wanted to talk to her about it and clear things up because I believed in her. I believed there was no way she would be so callous as to do that on purpose. No way would someone try and get someone they called a friend to kill themselves. So I deleted the screencaps and my post on tumblr. I deleted all evidence to protect her and I encourage you all never to fucking do that even if you think that person misunderstood the gravity of your situation. Because if you’re wrong no ones going to believe you.

I remember shifting between intense depression and total denial.

I spent the rest of that month in and out of intense dissociative states when I wasnt in class or working with my clients.  During the middle of October my sister sent me pictures of a litter of puppies and I was like ‘well, i really need to either kill myself or make sure i dont’. I spent a few days continuing to waffle with that decision but then i remembered my mom cosigned my loans and I cant leave her with that debt because fuck we cant even afford my funeral to begin with. So I adopted a dog, I named him Julio to remind me to keep living and he finally came to me on halloween.

He was the only reason I left bed on my days off. I tried not to think about it but I did.  

I continued to spiral with heavier dissociative episodes and vivid nightmares about it.

SUICIDE TW OVER

I waited until Christmas to ask her to clarify the situation and let her know I no longer felt comfortable writing with her. I reminded her what happened and told her to check her discord if she wanted to see for herself etc.

She sent two long asks of combative, emotionally abusive, and gaslighting accusations. The first thing she did was say I needed to provide evidence if I went around making accusations like that. Then she cascaded into how I always talked about marvel *points up to where i explained what happened earlier*.  She tried gaslighting me like a champion and tried turning me into a horrible person the only problem is everything she was accusing me of doing was the shit she was doing to me. Everything. 

Even if I was bad at any time I had given her numerous chances to tell me I was overstepping a boundary- she always said no. I gave her numerous times to unfollow me if she wasnt interested in interacting with me- she never did. In fact I had unfollowed her that month because of her behavior towards me and she hadnt even noticed.

I let her know I could tell she was angry,  and that I didnt take receipts of private conversations because I believed in settling things like adults, and that if she ever wanted any proof it was all in her discord anyway. I let her know she could contact me to apologize but otherwise I didnt want her on any of my blogs and I told her the first thing she should have done wasnt demand receipts but she should have asked if I was okay. Its a real reflection of where her priorities were when she demands evidence rather than checks to see if a writing partner is okay.

Even if I did something horrible it doesnt warrant someone trying to get me to end my life. 

I was notified she put a post on her blog apologizing to her followers for being a bad friend and that she was a horrible person and ofc everyone was like ‘noooo youre perfect’ and its like ya thats not for me who hasnt followed her in months- thats to save face.

Her friends blogs kept visiting my profile and going through the month where this happened.

Everything she did and said was to save face. Her blog and her reputation are the only thing she cared about. She has never approached me to apologize or anything of the sort and I doubt she ever will. I would hope she would never do this again and I hope she has grown as a person since. That her life is better and her mother is okay, that shes happy and learning. 

 I know by posting this I will never receive an apology- then again i never expected one to begin with. I could go through all the trouble of restoring the deleted files but to be honest it isnt worth it because theres no room in my life for that type of toxicity.

Since this happened I:

I have stronger episodes of depression and dissociation since.

My PTSD has increased and I have week long spikes in anxiety attacks, depression and decreased self worth if I even see her around the rpc despite being blocked, blacklisted on xkit etc.

Have more difficulty completing basic self care tasks due to an increase in depression and a decrease in self worth.

I have nightmares about this event and her to this day a year later.

I cannot interact with the RPC how I once did as I fear seeing her on my dash or any sort of information getting back to her about me.

It took me half a year to see the character she wrote as as safe again and for awhile I couldnt even look at him without experiencing an anxiety attack.

I keep having nightmares. Its been a year and I still have nightmares about this.

I find myself having more difficulties connecting with people online especially on this blog. I’m constantly on edge when interacting with people and I feel spikes of anxiety at the merest thought of someone talking about me to her.

I find myself unable to have confidence as a writer or creator online because I have been reminder of the cement wall between oc characters and their canon counterparts.

I cannot go out and just follow anyone and be friendly and trusting with them anymore, even with people I already know. In the back of my mind is a constant reminder of how she and her friends used to check up on people and pretend to write with them/ interact with them just to take screenshots of conversations to share with the group. I have become a paranoid little bitch in the past year is what Im saying. like theres 0 need for that shit.

I blocked most of the people she interacted with simply to save myself from being triggered by her blogs/ mentions of her and that isnt fair to those people.

I remember the photo incident and how people derived such joy from mocking someones body. I can think of so many incidents of them making fun of others and I remember how that could be happening about me rn, and I wonder if anyone would stick up for me like I did for the other mun.

 I hope by posting this I can try and return to the person I was before this happened. I can try and not be so bitter and reach out again to others. That somehow I can continue working on making tumblr a safe place for me again and not a PTSD laced minefield.

I would like to remind this isnt a callout and I request if you know who this is about you dont say anything to them. This isnt for them. They have NEVER reached out to apologize for their actions. They have NEVER checked to see if I was okay after that. They have NEVER shown any remorse for encouraging me to kill myself and while I hope they’ve grown from the situation and will never do it again I doubt I will ever get closure from such an event. But i DO hope by writing this I can take this place back.

Consider this my first step towards bringing this up to a therapist.

 Consider this another step to me taking this blog back and feeling safer here; and maybe just maybe Ill make up a cool pen name for myself and own that shit.

If you’ve read this far thank you for your patience with me, and I request you always treat your writing partners like the people that they are. 

This post is not intended or written to leave this blog and therefore I request you not reblog it or share segments of it with ANYONE. If I find you have shared anything on here without my explicit permission I will block you.

‘Citrus’

[coughsyrupcowboy]

Ok let me just explain something. Nobody is upset that Adam is dead and that someones ship didnt become canon. You guys are really simplifying it and not listening to the actual complaints and have your rose tinted glasses on. Yes this is a story of war, people die, ect ect. But that's not the issue, it's much deeper and more insulting than a character dying.

So a few months ago, the voltron crew were like hyping up so much for the new season and its representation. They said shire was gay and had an defiance that we'd meet. And u know if a content creator says shit like they usually explore it.

Cut to when the new season is released. Adam and Shiro have one(1) conversation and they're having an argument. Here's where that is a bad idea from a writing standing point: this has no emotional effect on anyone. Like, first of all it's not even subtexted. They're stiff and mad and just look like roommates. We never see adam before this scene. We have no idea what their relationship was like before. And the general message there, accidental or not, is that gay people cant be happy with their partner. They always butt heads. But I guess they cant give off that message because they're too fucking cowardly to make them even touch each other or look at each other, let alone explicitly state they're gay.

I'm not sayi g u cant be gay without a partner. God, that is not what anyone is saying. I'm saying they're doing shiro dirty and never fucking stated that ANYONE IS QUEER. (This includes pidge, because her gender arc thing was a huge ass cop out. They could have explored maybe a trans man pidge, a trans girl pidge, nonbinary pidge or genderfluid pidge. But no they pulled a classic shes the man and made her a trans coded cis girl.)

The fans arent mad at adam dying. Look if adam had more lines, an actual relationship with shiro on screen, and his death served for some sort of plot or character development, I can guarantee u no one would be as absolutely livid as we are now. He gets two scenes and hes a bitch in the first and dies in the next. The shiro doesnt even liek bat an eye. He monotony says adam at his grave thingy and is on his way like he didnt just lose the man he was gonna marry.

Yes people die in a war. Yes things dont always work out for everyone. People die, people drift apart, some people arent good for each other blah blah blah. But here's the thing, the crew that worked on this show are basically the all seeing gods of this universe ok. They have the power to pick a character off and give that characters death meaning. But here they didnt choose a character to die. They MADE a character only for him to die and they decided the character that was born to die has to be a gay man. They had two gay men and they thought the best course of action after hyping the shit out of their show and clearly pandering to the lgbt youths desperately starving for any kind of positive representation.

Then only to get a slap in the face after getting THAT NONSENSE. yes people die in a war, but they had the power to pick and choose who dies in said war.

If you're cis het, I doubt this hurts as much as it does to the lgbt fans. When I was growing up, lesbian was a bad word. I thought if you said lesbian you would go to hell. On TV everyone was straight and normal, but the gays got made fun off all the time. They were the butt of jokes, used to make a point on how weird and disgusting they are. Very rarely were there gay movies or gay characters in a movie that didnt end up dying from aids, being killed for being gay, separating from their lover cuz being gay "sucks", or realizing they were gay only for it to be a phase. And as a child this sends me the message that if you are gay, you are disgusting and will never be happy. Straight people love getting off on gay misery and thinking that counts as representation. They get brownie points for killing off their gay characters.

But you know what these movies surprisingly do better than voltron did. They actually give their gay characters fucking personality and lines. Sometimes if a Straight is feeling first theylly actually use the word gay! But what voltron did was absolutely unacceptable. I'm not defending the fucking homophobic movies. I'm sayi g the bar is so so so so low that its hitting the ground and DreamWorks thought "hey if I take this jackhammer and make the worst fucking rep that anyone has seen in a while, fhats still representation and the gays will love it!"

I'm not even a goddamn fan of the show and I'm upset. My boyfriend had me marathon with him and we were both so ficking pissed.

AND ANOTHER THING!!! some of yall dont know what queerbating actually is??? Yall seem to think queer baiting is teasing your ship and not instantly becoming canon??? No it's the advertisement team looking at the scraps that lgbt get in regards to media and shoving a huuuuuuge Turkey leg in their face and then proceeding to throw it in the trash. What I mean by this is that when an advertisement team and production team realizes that a lot of queer teens are their main audience, they'll try to like "introduce" gay shit. Sometimes you get sexy lesbians only there for men to leer at. Sometimes it's two very visibly gay coded men who are bffs and then the writers give both girlfriends. And sometimes its telling fans that u have representation only to take it away immediately.

No one's upset about one person dying. No one's upset about a gay person dying. No one's upset that their ship isnt canon. No one's upset that this isnt a show for romance. No one's upset that we didnt "get the queer content we wanted."

We're upset that we didnt get ANY queer representation. We are livid that we only know shiro is gay from word of god and that people who dont have that context wont know that they were a gay couple. I'm mad that they took the only other gay man in the whole entire series, refused to even say anything obviously gay and or romantic and then killed off adam and called that diversity.

The crew seems to think gay people are just bitter or have no personality outside being gay. Once you show me a stable,happy, more than two lines obviously and proudly queer character then I'll shut up.(again if u mention pidge, fuck off)

And to the people sayi g were acting like shiro died, well here's the thing they've killed this motherfucker like 4 times and if that doesnt speak volumes of how much they enjoy making Gay characters suffer idk how to help you. ALSO DONT ACT LIKE SHIRO IS EXPLICITLY GAY BECAUSE HE IS NOT EVEN SUBTEXT GAY OR QUEERCODED SO SHUT UP AMD LISTEN TO THE LGBT PEOPLE WHEN THEYRE MAD.

[misterbitches]

here’s what confuses me. we are on a public platform and people are posting things, tagging them, and even just perusing. ostensibly to be heard and get engagement. that’s how the internet works and what it encourages. so when people put something out there especially when they make it localized (? is that a right word) for access, why is the critique or response, even if it’s unfavorable, now a problem? we put it out there and it exists, if someone stumbles upon it why wouldn’t they engage? otherwise, why bother with all this output? i mean not many people read my posts but it’s a good thing for me to have them because what i do write it helps me understand the world better and something mainstream in ways it could be better and what could be done to get away from it. helping understand the context and history of the problems i am seeing on screen in many diff ways. but i do make it seen for a reason. i have drafts or posts privately that are just for me that i don’t think others should see so that means i do not want that engagement and i am closing it off. 

it isn’t like people can’t see it and respond if they so choose  bc this is basically a tacit agreement of having this in public. so if you have an opinion and someone disagrees why would that be hard for you if you are the one who put it out there? we know how this website works and how the web works. do we just want to hear what we agree with or even just know? otherwise i wouldn’t know shit. even with my best friends we try and come to a form of understanding and get on the same page or ask questions. i don’t get upset when they say, “no, because” or introduce a new perspective and this happens with the people i am closest to. so on a public place what else would we get? we allow ourselves to be seen...

i don’t think i have blocked anyone but i know people have blocked me and it has been for probably me being annoying but still fairly innocuous when i reply with a critique or make a joke. you take this risk posting it every time. but i dont want to block people because they could be of value at some point even if i want nothing to do with them. but every time it so happens that i say something even a little off from what this person wants—and it’s generally when i go into things in detail—they shut down from the perception that i am being hateful or accusatory or unfair? even when i try de-escalation tactics or being like “calm down” (not that explicitly) so these seem to be very emotional responses to not hearing exactly what we want and knowing there’s objection when there should be anyway. even if pieces are damn near perfect there’s still something. i find it very hard to believe that there’s intense pain enacted on others for liking “unsavory” things when the “unsavory” is the mainstream and it is necessary to uphold these things and for capital to continue to produce what it does. you’re not different when you accept it into your life either critically or uncritically because that is the norm. so when people are knocking the norms, tropes, whatever it’s like a shock every time and like someone is telling you not to enjoy it. but, again, we put this shit out there and want a response so it cannot be just what we want to hear. i hate that i hate the idea that wanting a  work to be better and seeing shit critically even as a leftist or whatever is oppressive and limiting other ppl when it is in no way the same or even on par with being silenced in general because of the garbage you find in a work. you will still be the minority and it will still be popular so there’s a false sense of superiority put onto others who disagree by the ones who feel “attacked” or like they can’t defend themselves or whatever. and who fucking says? if some random says so like oh well man. you cannot compare it to the real shit these fans do and the massive fanbases they have and the shunning they love to do then feel as if they are priority in feelings.

 they say everyone is sensitive and not able to think about things with nuance but it’s the opposite most times. you aren’t and when someone pops up with it or even says something offhanded cos they dont feel like having a huge discussion that is not the same as pushing others down. there is no majority saying this is wrong and we don’t want it; there’s a majority dedicated to defending it, their choices, and frankly the false sense of even light persecution. especially as adults but in fandom you’re not encouraged to act as a fully fleshed out person for a majority reasons and esp in a fandom that will skew younger. they are reliant on rabid fans or uncritical ones and i have demonstrated that constantly and given quotes etc. we should talk about discourse and what the private owes to the public, what the state owes its viewers, what artists owe the people tuning in. we should talk abou tfreedom of speech forreal and what that means but if we go deep into that you’ll unveil more things you dont’ like how people absolutely rally against this shit and want nothing to do with it. if you don’t want to think about that that is fine but it doesn’t mean others won’t say it.

idk like it may seem insensitive but i dont like the idea that a person pointing out things that are gross or micro or macro agrressive or what the fuck ever is the ruler over the discourse and how people interact with the work when frankly that just isn’t the case in the pattern of the work that people do and utilizing fans and using capital to defend yourself and recreate industry. you may not like to hear that it’s all bullshit but people will say so and it holds not even close to the same weight that the tacit agreement in indulging can sway  us towards not great perceptions. the harm of pointing things out, or being rude, or whatever is not the same as what fans will do to those people and the obfuscation of the real fucking issue. 

now it’s no longer about the problems in itself but the way people are receptive to the way others respond when they have a problem with the very real and prominent problem. now there’s no interest in engagement or even seeing people who may have more to say to it. if we think constantly about defending our right to like a work then the work takes ona life of its own and it latches on to your emotions even more it’s so fucking silly bc it’s like....this shit isnt for us anyway and if it’s gonna be here we should make it better and talk about it but it’s not about that it’s not about the rapes it’s not about the culture it’s about personal feelings which is why it becomes about how we talk about it as if things that ever skew to the left or focus on liberation would ever be the most popular. since when did saying this is fucking bullshit, this shit sucks, this real “crime” means nothing because it’s just entertainment yet you must find ways to defend your right to see that entertainment. it makes no sense no one is talking about that we’re talking about the ins-and-outs of storytelling and the toxicity and nature of these REAL PROBLEMS THAT ARE PROBLEMS SINCERE PROBLEMS as in there is no negotiation in wrong or right because it is wrong in every sense it’s what you do with that wrongness and what the fuck you want to say. it’s not about what i say about them being fucking shitty about the way they say it. dont focus on the way i dislike it focus on what the fuck im saying man bc this shit is disingenuous and it COMPLETELY eclipses the issues and attitudes and it lets these fucking idiots off the fucking hook for making straight up garbage like not even in a sociopolitical way just thoughtless drivel sometimes. like most times i dont even hate the villains in these shows or the men who are o dark and fucked up but we still got to like them it’s literally like “no nigga like why r u here tho?” what do u fucking add. you’re dead space and they let us know it’s dead space by saying “oh man isn’t life SOOOO complex dont think about it just think about him being a nice rapist okay guys even tho we are gong to do NOTHING ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to establish fucking any of that” 

this is what people said for tharntype and it’s what they say about fucking everything whether it’s about gay shit or not. good example is the star wars fans with that guy and that girl or wahtever in that stupid racist franchise. just clamoring to make sure we know you’re good and that you’re okay for thinking that way when no one says you aren’t. but if something is presented then expect to get a fucking response especially abut what it is about at its fucking core. enough of the bullshit about misunderstanding and acknowledge it’s about your comfort in your interests and not having that questioned or antagonized in a way that may implicate you are a bit complicit but fucking all of us are as consumers. you arent hurt for having an opinion that seems to not go with the flow but is certainly part of the status quo. the world relies relies on harm, in a way it is reliant on rape, and that permeates through us and always takes precedent. additionally, again, this shit is mad patriarchal so it does a disservice to us as well as women cos it’s like. no man that’s born out of misogyny actually. what can we do? well, dont rely on the state. but if you dont rely on the state then will you make real money? not the money we’re talking here with the genre in itself. to me that means they dont have an interest in showing different types of lives they have a majority interest in showing “attractive” “conventional” men kissing and making bank.

[writterings]

hey, this isnt meant to be like an attack at u for liking the show, but whats the deal with camp camp?? i havent watched it but ive heard Bad things abt RT and the show itself, and i wanted to hear ur pov on it,, thanks!!!

idk anything about RT tbh but like camp camp. hoo boy. basically, it’s an adult show. an offensive adult show. sure, at the end of the day, it has heart. but like the main point of the show is to be satirical to brink of borderline offensive. think rick and morty style humor. 

i think basically people have an issue with it because they expect it to be something it’s not. like, YEAH, it has a lot of shitty jokes and YEAH i sincerely believe a the majority of said shitty jokes shouldn’t have been made…but like, you’re not gonna get steven universe-type of “uwu moral purity” with this show. like i mentioned before, it’s an adult show. most people watching it should be mature enough to know the fucked up stuff they’re joking about is fucked up without the show explicitly explaining it. that’s why it’s satire. 

like i mentioned earlier, it’s really not any worse than rick and morty. the difference between everyone’s reactions to the show, though, is that people don’t seem to realize that camp camp is a dark-humor adult show. this is probably because:

they subvert the trope of the grouchy mentor and the cheerful sidekick – aka david is the cheerful and seemingly naive one, whereas max is the bitter fuck. since it’s a KID preaching to all of us about why the world is meaningless and how nothing matters, it’s suddenly cutesy and on the same level as a kid’s cartoon in their mind. because yknow. it’s a kid. thus the show should have kid-like morals and explain and openly condemn everything problematic in detail because the main audience is OBVIOUSLY kids, who don’t know enough about morality to recognize fucked up shit when they see it 

a lot of the main characters are kids. see my above explaination of the “because. yknow. it’s a kid.”

it’s a cartoon. see above explanation. 

it’s not on adult swim. trust me, rick and morty would get a lot more flack if it wasn’t on a network KNOWN for being deliberately offensive, and it only gets praised as much as it does without said flack because it isn’t on a family guy or american dad type of shitty “lol R U TRIGGERED SJWS???” level. camp camp is just competing against itself in terms of offensive shittiness. since it’s compared to practically nothing, we can’t see how it differs in comparisons to other “offensive” adult animations and what it does right. 

people don’t seem to realize that it’s satire….like, i know there’s a popular tumblr post going around that’s like “satire is only satire when it’s mocking those in power!!!” which, yeah, is true and camp camp does do that. but that’s not just what satire is. satire is, by definition, “the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues”…which is exactly what camp camp does as well. and it doesn’t explicitly state that it’s mocking something or that it’s satire because it assumes the audience should be mature enough to realize that

(though the use of satire shouldn’t be used to excuse all of its jokes however. i do agree camp camp crosses the line at several points. but like. you’re never gonna find a 100% “morally pure uwu” piece of media. not an excuse for the jokes still. but like. you see my point.)

in short….that’s the deal with camp camp, in my opinion. if you like rick and morty, or enjoy something like south park, family guy, american dad, flithy frank (not a cartoon but w/e) in an objective “i recognize this is fucked up but i still find it funny” type of way…then you got no right to be preaching about the sins of camp camp unless it’s coming from a place of actually liking the show and wanting it to improve. like it’s okay to hate the show, it’s okay to be uncomfortable with the jokes. but like. realize what type of show it is before condemning it as an “uwu problematic children’s cartoon”.