#if thats the bar for being a terrible person I have bad news for you about all of humanity

[professor-doc-emeritus]

I do not understand this bizzare narrative around himym thats formed in the decade since it ended claiming that ted mosby is a Nice Guy™. The trademark characteristic of the Nice Guy™ is that he never actually gets laid because he puts forth zero effort and feels entitled to sex just for Being Nice™. This could not be more antithetical to ted mosby's character. Aside from the fact that the man has a new woman on his arm every fucking week, the entire gag of ted is that he tries way too hard with every woman he meets and ends up getting in his own way. He has never once in his entire life rested on his romantic laurels. Plus, he has an iota of self awareness, and is occasionally capable of acknowledging when he has been/is being an asshole, something that is impossible for the prototypical Nice Guy™

Ted's actual toxic trait is that he created an imaginary perfect woman in his mind, and then projected the image of that perfect woman onto every single person he dated, and then resented them for all the ways they don't measure up to his fantasies. Then, instead of actually addressing the problems he has with his partner head on with them, or learning to compromise, or god forbid just quitting while he's ahead, he just ignores these irreconcilable differences, hoping they'll just one day magically go away, until inevitably everything boils over and he goes through a nasty breakup. EVERY serious girlfriend ted has on the show has a massive, obvious incompatibility with him, usually one that was abundantly clear from the millisecond he meet them, but he without fail ignores it, does everything he can to woo a girl he shouldn't be with, and then when everything goes up in flames he just chocks it up to "she wasn't the one!" and hard banks on this imaginary friend he's come up with for himself materializing into his life out of thin air. He'll work hard to get the girl, but he won't do anything substantial to actually keep her. He's so caught up in this fantasy of a perfect partner that he wastes the prime years of his life chasing after women that he pretty much knew from the jump would never want to be with him long term, in the hopes that they would change to fit his fantasies and everything would just magically work out because "destiny." But that doesn't fit into a 2-word soundbite so you don't really see much discussion of it online

[dameronology]

best friend {javier pena x reader}

summary: after finally calling it a day on a bad relationship, you turn to javier for comfort

warnings: mentions of alcohol + smoking, swearing

i was listening to best friend by rex orange county when i was writing this so i guess it’s loosely based on it? it’s definitely where the title came from. i hope you enjoy!

- jazz

Javier hated pulling all nighters - he especially hated them when it was Friday. Everyone else at the office was either going out to drink or going home to spend the evening with their families. The sounds of music and laughter that surrounded the outside of the DEA offices only acted as a reminder of how lonely he’d become; because, even if Colombia was the source of much of his grief, for others, it was their home. Their happiness and their life. Both of which, these days, seemed to be things he struggled to find

That wasn’t to say that his life completely lacked enrichment. Between the antics of you and Murphy, and the progress you were all making towards capturing Escobar, things weren’t all that bad. Especially you. He didn’t entirely know what your presence in his life meant, but it was a hell of lot. It felt like he’d finally started to see his life in colour when you were assigned the desk beside his. Your energy and your wit enriched everything, even if 99% of your relationship consisted of taking swipes at one another, 

If there was one thing he was grateful on nights like these, it was that the DEA apartment building wasn’t too far from the office. Murphy had clearly gotten home hours ago, because his car was in his spot and the lights to his unit at the front of the complex were dimmed. Your own vehicle was a few spaces over from Javi’s, terribly parked (as per usual) and barely between the white lines. At least he could take comfort in the fact that both his friends had made it home safe.

Or, you’d at least made it the front steps of the building. 

Javier almost did a double take when he saw you, a half-burnt cigarette in one hand and a completely empty bottle of wine in the other. You were slumped against the railings, eyes glued to the floor in front of you. He knew had it been a rough week - there had been a lot of bloodshed and not a lot of progress - but he hadn’t realised it had been that bad. And you would have told him, right? You told him everything. Literally everything. Probably more than you told your own damn boyfriend (who he hated - not that it was important). 

‘Jesus.’ Javi didn’t bother to offer you a greeting. 

You looked up at a him, a hazy smile playing on your face when your eyes met. ‘Agent Pena! How are you doing?’

‘You never call me that. I hate it.’ He muttered, dropping onto the stairs beside you. ‘Please don’t tell me you drove home like this.’

‘God, no.’ You snorted. ‘I drove home then went to a bar with Tom.’

‘How is he?’

‘Him? Yeah, we broke up.’ You casually shrugged. ‘So then I brought some wine and realise I left my keys.’

‘Oh, honey.’ Javi murmured. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘Don’t give me that, Jav.’ You elbowed him slightly. ‘I know you hated him.’

‘Guilty as charged.’

Javier stood up, moving the bottle aside and sticking his hand out to you. He didn’t exactly relate to what you were going through. Mostly because he didn’t get into relationships, or that he was always the one to end them. He hadn’t really known heartbreak in the conventional sense. Sure, he’d felt a pang in his chest when you first introduced him to your now ex just over a year ago, but that wasn’t loss. It was just..something he didn’t want to think about. It was a can of worms he’d been pretty good at keeping shut, and he was not going to start sorting through it at 1AM. He was far from drunk (unlike some people) but hours and hours of paperwork and chain smoking had fogged his brain. Right then, you needed a friend, and that was something he could be. Though you hadn’t shared all that much emotion together - mostly just careless banter and harmless teasing - your jobs had bonded you for life. You’d certainly witnessed a lot of twisted things, and it meant that you and Murphy were the only two people in the world who truly understood the kind of thing he dealt with. And, with all due respect to Murphy, you got on Javi’s nerves a fuck ton less. 

You tangled your fingers with his, letting him drag you up off the steps. Stumbling for a moment, you gripped onto his shirt for balance. It felt like somebody had taken a baseball bat to your head and to your stomach. Whether you wanted to chunder or faint first, you didn’t know. The only thing you could think about was the warm arms wrapping around your waist, and the feeling of Javier’s body being flush against yours as he pulled you against his side and guided you into the building. 

‘Where do you think you left your keys?’ He gently asked. He didn’t say anything when you slumped further against him, all your energy staying solely on walking and not falling. 

‘Thabar.’ You murmured.

‘Huh?’

‘The bar.’ You repeated. ‘I’ll go back in the morning. It’s fine.’

‘I don’t think you’ll be awake before midday.’ Javi chided. 

He held you there for a moment, fumbling about for his own keys, before kicking open the apartment door.

His place wasn’t bad, but it didn’t feel that far off of a show apartment, or the window of an Ikea. It was identical to yours, except you’d actually made yours homier. Javi’s, meanwhile, looked exactly as it had the day he’d moved in. None of the furniture had moved, and the television had probably been turned on a total of twice. Whilst your place was covered in photos and personally belongings, his was filled with bottles of whiskey and strewn leather jackets. He did have one photo hanging on his fridge; it was a Polaroid of him, you and Murphy, chilling out at your favourite bar. You were in the middle of them, practically hanging off their arms with a grin on your face. Javier would never let either of you actually know how much you meant to him. He couldn’t deal with the teasing. 

The next few moments were a blur of you dropping onto his sofa, hitting the leather with a thump. He tossed a warm blanket over you, before helping you kick off your shoes and taking a seat beside you. With the alcohol making you more brazen than usual, you didn’t think twice about curling against his side, and Javier didn’t think twice about letting you. He knew better than anyone that sometimes, a hug was the best medicine - so, he tossed an arm over your shoulders, pulling you towards him in a similar manner to how he had done in the hallway. The smell of his aftershave was gentle, mixed with a faint smell of cigarettes and the mint hand cream he insisted he didn’t use. It was just...Javi. And you loved it. 

‘Do you wanna talk about it?’ Javi gently asked, thumb rubbing circles over the bare skin on your arm.

‘I dunno what there is to say.’ You murmured. ‘I saw it coming. I definitely saw it coming but I just...I thought he was it you know. I mean, you probably don’t know because the one for you is whiskey and cigarettes-’

‘- is this an attack on me or your ex?’ He joked. 

‘Right, sorry.’ You peered up at him through hooded eyes. ‘Just hurts, y’know? Because for all his flaws, he’s probably as good as I’m ever gonna get.’

‘That’s bullshit and you know it.’ He reminded you. ‘That man never deserved you.’

‘He wasn’t that bad, Jav.’

‘Remember all the times you were in a bad mood because he was late, or because he didn’t turn up to a date?’ His brown eyes flickered, staring at the blank wall ahead. He didn’t mean to overstep, or to be protective, but it was just that it you. And that was reason enough. 

‘He was trying his best.’

‘If that’s his best, then he’s in trouble.’ He snorted. 

You groaned, flopping further down into his chest. ‘It’s hopeless. I’m hopeless. I don’t need a man to survive but maybe thats why I get through them so quickly.’

‘You’re not the problem.’ Javi said. 

‘My mum always said I was too much to handle-’

‘-  you’re not.’ He cut you off. ‘If they think you’re too much, then they’re not worth your time.’

‘There’s seven billion people on the planet. There must be someone, right?’

‘You don’t need to find somebody. You’re more than enough on your own.’ He said. (What he meant to say was: you don’t need to find somebody, but it’s okay if you want me). 

‘I know.’ You murmured. 

A silence fell over you. Javier wasn’t entirely sure what to say, because every time he tried to go over the possibilities, it kept ending with him declaring that he was the one you should be with. It made sense logistically. 

You didn’t like to be looked after, but you always let him. You both had the same job, so you both understood the struggle. The spark between you two was fucking immense and there was always something to talk about. It was hard to find a single reason not to be together - except for timing. And timing was kind of everything, especially when there was so much at stake. How much of it you needed, he didn’t know. That wasn’t even calculating in the fact that it would take Javier at least thirty more cycles of convincing himself to tell you before he finally took the plunge. 

‘Thank you for helping me tonight.’ You sleepily mumbled. 

‘Always.’ Javier replied. 

‘I’m trying not to fall asleep on you-’

‘- go ahead.’ He cut you off with a soft chuckle. 

‘I appreciate you.’ 

That was the last thing you managed, before sleep completely overtook you. This was new ground for your friendship - physical touch, deep conversations, Javi teetering dangerously close on the precipice of enlightening you with his feelings. The bottom could even have the best landing ever, or the worst. Was it worth the risk? 

Javi peered down at you, completely enamoured at the sight of you quietly snoozy, hand splayed out on his chest and eyes screwed shut. This could be an everyday thing. Domesticity and closeness and you. He could feel his chest physically hurting at the feeling; at the prospect of having you. Like, actually having you. 

He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, brown eyes flickering up to the ceiling. That was when he knew in his very soul, the answer to that question.

You were worth every risk.

[extravaguk]

santa&prada

part of my opposites attract! series. 

ksj / knj / myg / jhs / kth / jjk

pairing: rich!jimin x reader

summary: Yeah, Park Jimin most likely didn't even realize he was being a rude and disrespectful son of a bitch.

wordcount: 5k

genre: smut - angst(? - fluff (? idk u tell me

rated: m 

warnings: a christmas fic in late november, cursing, a huge misunderstanding lmao, i call jimin ‘park jimin’ too many times bc i felt like it, car sex, oral (f recieving), some good ole spanking, (kinda) rough and unprotected sex, a lil of dirty talk, spit kink. thats about it. just an excuse to write jimin fucking you in a car. jimin is not as bad as oc thinks srsly.

The first time you meet Park Jimin is through mutual friends. On a firday night on December, with white, red and green lights decorating the streets of New York, filled with the typical hustle of the masses doing last minute Christmas shopping, the freezing weather impacting your body temperature, cursing yourself for choosing tights, a skirt and heeled boots that are too pretty but too uncomfortable to wear.

You had never considered yourself a particular enthusiast of Christmas festivities. You guess discovering Santa Claus was, actually, your parents before the rest of the kids in your class was one of the many reasons that made you grow up too soon and therefore, not allowing you to fully enjoy the month of December. Or maybe it had nothing to do with Santa, and more to do with your parents deciding to get a divorce a day before Christmas Eve. A traumatic event for seven year old you, but completely forgotten and overcome by twenty-four year old present you.

Growing up each Christmas suffering the consecuences of a shared custody would have probably had a disastrous effect on anybody else, but not you. Although the separation was a tough reality to accept at first, fortunately your parents were always capable of raising you in an environment full of love and affection, just like any other kid. And you prided yourself on having moved on from those circumstances a long time ago (even if your therapist disagreed and blamed many of your behaviors on it. Whatever.)

To put it simply, December was just not the month for you. It was just another month, like the remaining eleven of the year, except Mariah Carey's voice was heard every five minutes everywhere you'd go and people gave each other presents as if it was only during that time of the year when they remembered their loved ones. 

The only thing you could thank Christmas for were the well deserved two weeks of holidays our work allowed until the new year's arrival. Fifteen days of rest, peace and baking those gingerbread cookies that Seokjin died for and that you sincerely denoted as nauseating.

You truly had no idea what exactly you did wrong that night. You don't know if it was something you said, or something you did, but what you did know was that Park Jimin pursued a silent and personal vendetta against you that continued nowadays.

"Here are your disgusting cookies, you filthy animal." it might have been that very first sentence you said when you entered the bar and reunited with your friends that didn't cause a good impression. "Shit, it's cold as fuck. My nipples are harder than my life." or maybe it was your selection of words while you waved every familiar face hello until you stopped to look at the only (pretty. too pretty, as well) one you had never seen before.

"_____, it's Chrismtas! Santa Clause will only bring you a lump of coal if you keep cursing like that!" Lisa laughed while she kissed your cheek and made space for you to sit next to her. "Oh, by the way, this is Jimin. A friend of Namjoon. He's a newbie!"

Park Jimin was stunning, you had no trouble admitting that. You weren't blind, you weren't stupid, and you could go as far as theorize that his dark eyes, his light and always immaculate styled hair, his sharp jawline and those plump lips as red as cherries must have been sculpted by Satan himself.

Fuck, you were even sure you'd be on your knees in front of Park Jimin in an alternative universe begging for his dick inside your mouth. But in the universe where you and the real Park Jimin reside, he would never come near you unless somebody was aiming a gun into his skull.

You're not precisely sure what it was, but a brief exchange of glances and an evasive and sligh shake of hands with Park Jimin was enough to make you feel ashamed and withdrawn for the rest of the night.

If Jimin wasn't even able to drop a polite "Nice to meet you", he sure as hell wasn't able to pretend you even existed.

Even the small talk you had tried to engaged with him about his shiny pair of shoes went terribly wrong.

"Oh, are those Dolce and Gabbana?"

"Dolce and Gabbana are homphobic, racist and sexist, so no" the grimace on his face should've been enough to make you regret speaking to him in the first place , but the snarky voice of his made you want to run away and hide from him until next Christmas.

In reality, you swore you didn't care. Seriously. Other's opinions were never something that could easily bother you or keep you awake at night. You had always turned a deaf ear to the cruel children that made fun of you due to your parent's divorce, you had always ignored the amount of men that never considered you "ladylike" enough (what the fuck did that even mean, anyway? what exactly made a lady and what didn't?), and you had always disregarded any envous comment surrounding you.

So, fuck Park Jimin! You had said to yourself. He's just a well mannered rich boy. Somebody who didn't resemble you in any aspect. A stupid, pretentious, spoiled boy who's had everything he's ever wanted in the palm of his hand, unlike you. Who the fuck cares what Park Jimin thinks? 

But apparently, you did. 

You would have never placed such importance to whatever it was that roamed inside Jimin's head if his appearances in your group of friends hadn't been so recurrent.

Because each time you were forced to see Jimin's face, you were also forced to experience a strange knot of discomfort and humilliation growing in your stomach in his mere presence. It's not like Jimin did anything specific to make you feel that way. He might not even do it on purpose, or his intentions might not be entirely evil. Maybe he simply didn't realize how he always avoided being by your side like the plague, or how his body immediately tensed and he balled his hands into fists everytime you were less than two feet away from him, or how he would look at you from the corner of his eye everytime you decided you speak, almost as if he was waiting for you to shut up to finally let out the air he was containing inside his lungs in relief.

Yeah, Park Jimin most likely didn't even realize he was being a rude and disrespectful son of a bitch.

And with time, you couldn't help but attribute that disdain and hostility that Park Jimin always directed at you to the many undeniable differences that constituted each of you. Park Jimin, with his impeccable and always well ironed Prada shirts, his spotless trousers, jewelry that probably costed more than three of your annual salaries, and always emanating that Givenchy fragance that screamed "wealth!" every rare occasion you could experiment his presence next to you. Exactly two years after that first meeting with Park Jimin, you hadn't been able to avoid reciprocating that feeling of contempt towards him. Not when you were the only victim of his arrogance. Everybody loved Park Jimin, and Park Jimin loved everyone. 

Except you.

Clinging to your glass of Don Pérignon and finishing the rest of the liquid in one go, you try to snap out of your own thoughts, reminding yourself to return to the conversation you're currently having with Taehyung about a pretty waitress that he's met during one of his art exhibitions (or at least that's what you think you caught him say) and forcing yourself by all means to stop observing the friendly and kind smiles that Park Jimin was shooting to those present from across the room and that you will never be able to achieve. 

"_____? Are you even listening to me, darling?" Taehyung's voice is what makes you finally look away from the dumb blond standing on the opposite side of the room, blinking a few times before clearing your throat. 

"Sorry, Tae." letting out a sigh, you try to brush back and put in place the strand of hair that escaped the intricate hairdo you had tried and so miserably failed to do yourself to try to fit in and hopefully impress such environment of preppy and privilaged people (ahem, Park Jimin)  falling on your forehead as best as you can. "Just been really stressed this week and I'm on another planet. You know how I feel about Christmas. I think I need a new flute of . Or five."

Taehyung sends you a look full of empathy and places one of his hands in your shoulder, squeezing lightly in a comforting way. "I'll get you another one. I'll be right back." You quickly interrupt him though, to prevent him from standing up before you.

"No, really. I'll go. I need some fresh air anyways, if you don't mind." And of course Taehyung doesn't mind, so you get on your feet as graceously as your tipsy state allowed you to (who told you it was a good idea to drink three glasses in less than thirty minutes of the extremely expensive champagne Taehyung had brought to the Christmas party he had organized and why did it convince you it would appease your anxiey?) and make your way towards the table where the rest of the bottles are. A table dangerously close to the conversation Jimin and that friend of Lisa (whose name you don't remember) were having.

Both are with their backs turned and, honestly, you take a silent moment to thank God or whatever is up there because the last thing you need right now is yet another awkward interaction with Jimin, so you try as best as you can to refill your glass of champagne to get out of there as soon as possible, praying to make your exit going unnoticed.

But no. Because the stars and the universe loved to align to make you suffer! They love to play with your karma and they love making you damn that one day you didn't help that lady cross the street. They love making you regret buying those plastic straws. They love making you feel guilty for hacking your neighbour's Wifi when you run out of money to pay for yours. Because the moment you try to take a hold of the bottle in your hands, it slips out of your grasp, and you're watching in slow motion how the sparkling berverage ends up spilling all over the extremely expensive (or so you assume. Balenciaga maybe) suit pants Park Jimin decided to wear that night.

Everything is kind of blurry and you can't even hear anything. You can only watch as Park Jimin turns around, lips parted and eyebrows furrowed, until his eyes find you, the bane of his existance and immediately recognizing the culprit of his now drenched piece of clothing. And you can watch as, once again, his gaze turns almost black and narrow lightly as to reprimend you for what you've caused. But of course he doesn't say a word. He has nothing to say. He doesn't even look surprised. No. Because obviously, Park Jimin knew that if there was somebody in this room willing to ruin his night, it would be you, and only you.

"Shit!" you're the first one to break the strained silence, but that only makes Jimin flinch. "Shit, shit, shit. I'm so fucking dumb! J-Jimin, I'm so sorry, let me just go grab a paper tow-"

"Don't." his voice cuts through you. Literally cuts through you. Because it's not often that Park Jimin decides to aim his words at you, but everytime he does it holds the same frigid tone. Like knives trying to painfully stab your being. "Just, don't."

In reality, you don't know a lot of things and you don't know what causes what happens next. You don't know if it's the specific time of the year, you don't know if it's your internal stress, or if it's Park Jimin, his voice, or the fact that he will never like you. But it's instant. They way something compresses your chest, and suddenly your eyes are not glaced by the alcohol but by something wet that threatens to flow. You would never admit to anyone they're tears.

So, shutting your mouth and swallowing the uncomfortable feeling of anguish in your throat, leaving your flute forgotten on the table and grabbing the bottle instead. Without saying a word, your feet start moving up the stairs of the ridiculously enourmous house Taehyung owns towards the first free and empty balcony you can find. Free of people and free of Park Jimin.

Closing the large window behind you, you allow yourself to close your eyes and take a deep breath; the icy temperature outside immediately welcoming you. Although the hairs on your arm stand up and you know you're probably going to catch a cold (because the dress you've chosen for the dinner is not at all appropiate for such winter climate), at least the tension in your body seems to disappear while oxygen keeps that ugly feeling in your heart at bay from continuing to choke you.

With shaky hands, you take a big gulp straight from the champagne bottle. Fuck Park Jimin. No man will ever have the power to make you feel what you're feeling right now.  Fuck Park Jimin. And fuck his beautiful face and his ability to make you tremble and fear looking like an idiot. Fuck his fancy clothes and his perfect manicured hands and his marvelous but frigthening presence. 

Knock knock.

The sound makes you jump back from the window, hand grasping your chest while you turn around, coming face to face with the man in question.  Your first instinct is to ignore him. But that thought is already out of the way when it's him the one who struggles with the window lock before opening and taking a step towards you. You step back as he steps in, raising your head up high and puffing your chest. Because your second instinct is to tell Park Jimin to go fuck himself.

"_____, I would like to-"

"You would like to what?" Jimin looks taken aback at your harshness. Alcohol has always been a weapon of mass destruction in your system, provoking words to flow too easily and without filter out of your mouth, more than they already do when you're sober. Especially when it's mixed with the frustration you've been harboring inside of you for two years. That's why when the words start to come out, they won't stop. "To make me feel like shit one more time? To look at me with that fucking conceited face trying to make me feel like you're better than me? Or would you like to ignore me once again as you always do everytime we're in the same fucking room to make sure I know you hate my mere existance, even if it's just the two of us right now?"

The steam leaving your lips due to the accelerated beat of your heart blurs his face for an instant while he looks at you dumbfounded. The silence and his expression makes you scoff, an acidic smile adorning your face while you take another sip of your drink because even with such a stupid face, he still looks delectable with his white shirt and ruined pants. You turn around, removing a tear that you hadn't even realized had fallen during your speech and that, frankly, you were hoping he hadn't either. You would blame it on the cold, anyway.

This time, a gust of wind running through you from head to toe, making you forget of Park Jimin's presence looming behind you, reminding you it's still December and the fabric of your dress is doing nothing to conceal you from the cold.

But before you can do anything about it and blame yourself for being dumb and not taking your coat with you before deciding to step into balcony, Park Jimin surprises you once again, this time by placing his navy blue blazer over the naked skin of your arms.

Your back straightens when you feel his warm breath caressing the back of your neck, at the same time that a voice you have never heard Park Jimin use with you echoes in your ears.

"I really don't hate you, _____. I..." Jimin wets his lips. His body trembles, but it's not due to lacking his own coat, while his brain hurriedly searches for words eloquent and adequate enough to explain voice his thoughts. "I like you very much, _____."

Scoffing again while you shake your head, you push down with all your inner strenght the incipent fluttering of butterflies in your stomach that Jimin has managed to cause in just a matter of seconds. It's probably the longest sentence you've heard from him in two years, and you don't exactly understand why your body is reacting the way it is. But you're also not willing to give Park Jimin the satisfaction of knowing that. He doesn't deserve it anyway. So with all the courage you can muster, you turn around with your hands clenching.

And even though being at such short distance from Jimin is a bit overwhelming and unexpected for you, the irritation still making your blood bubble is enough to not let a man as handsome as him derail you from your current circumstances.

"Well, fuck you Park Jimin. You certainly have a funny fucking way to sh-" his hands cradling your jaw that pull you closer to him and his lips that silent you roughly, but with surprising care. Only for a moment. A moment in which your body betrays you and make you melt into hir warmth. But his voice, low and sinfully husky, murmurs against your lips. 

"God, that mouth of yours..." he goes back to attacking your own lips, this time more firm than before, snatching a sigh from you. The sound has his tongue asking for permission into your mouth, and with your body betraying you once again, you part your lips to allow him in. It's him who whimpers this time, while one of his hand moving until it reaches the bottle in your hand and letting it drop carelessly onto the floor, ignoring the sound of glass shattering and the future scolding you'll get from Taehyung. Instead, he sneaks that same hand on your waist, pulling your body flush against his, fingers digging onto your skin. "It's been driving me crazy for two years. Two years, _____."

He mumbles between kisses and swipes his tongue against yours, while he stars walking the both of you until your back meets the nearest concrete wall. 

"Two years of having to hear the incessant filthy words that leave your mouth..." his own stop their movements and you catch yourself before begging him to reattaching his lips to yours, enjoying instead the path of wet kisses and bruises his lips traile from your chin to the pulse of your neck "...and trying my best to hide the painful boners I get whenever you're nearby." 

With your eyes shut, your hands are back in motion, ignoring the voice in your head reminding you he's still an asshole and finding their way between Jimin's soft golden strands of hair. He hums in appreciation, sending goosebumps all over your body. "So, s-so why not do anything about it sooner?" you say, suddenly finding it difficult to breathe properly.

You feel Jimin's body tensing before you and he ceases the movement of his lips against your neck. Breaking away, your heart stops, afraid you might have ruined the moment. But Jimin's in search of your eyes, eyebrows very lighlty raised, the intensity of his gaze pinning you in place. You don't know for how long you stare at each other until Jimin comes out of the trance, eyes descending over your flushed cheeks, the very same color as your lips and the soft flesh of your neck until they reach your cleavage, the glimmering fabric encasing your breasts, taunting him the same way they had been doing all night long.

"You scare me so much..." and then, one of his hands repeats the same journey his eyes just did, until he touches your shoulder, right under his own blazer. "Everytime I look at you, all I can think of why the hell a girl as real as you like you would even glance my way." he slides the strap of your dress slowly tentatively, just enough for you to stop his advances if you chose so. You don't. "You're smart in ways I could never compare, so funny it makes me jealous, and so pretty it leaves me speechless. You're...You're everything I'm not."

His voice resonates in the atmosphere, and you would love to blame it on the cold again for how your body has reacted, but your body heat has increased so much since he started kissing you that it would be stupid not to admit that it's just the effect that Park Jimin has on you tonight. You're sure he would've had the same effect if it had happened before.

Your now uncovered breast doesn't even has to suffer the consequences of the icy wind, because one of Jimin's arms quickly comes around you to hold your body against his, lifting you ever so slighty until your erect nipple is at the same level as his mouth and his lips are enveloping it in their warmth. You gasp his name, and that encourages his teeth to tug softly before his tongue stars moving in circes. 

"My God, you're so perfect." Your head spins while you hold onto his shoulders as tight as you can, the undeniable heat roaming all over your form, hips involuntarily rutting his incipent erection poking your abdomen. "Been thinking about this since that night we first met." Looking for relief, Jimin mirrors your movements without ceasing the administrations on your chest, as one of his hands lifts one of your thighs to wrap around his waist, closing the short gap remaining between the both of you. 

"Ohmygod! F-fuck, Jimin," trying to form coherent phrases is almost impossible, not with Jimin finding a slow and tortuous rythm with his hips, his clothed cock rubbing against your core. Something shifts in the air, because Jimin stops abusing your nipple with a loud pop, and shuts you up by pressing his mouth onto yours in an urgent, dirty and desperate kiss. You could almost hear him swearing, while his hand keeps your jaw in place.

"S-stop talking like that, ______." his voice, inaudible, and his face now hiding in the crook of your neck, the thrusting of his hips speeding up, more and more frantic this time. The hand not holding your thigh against his hipbone reveals your other breast, hand covering it and giving it a light squeeze before tugging at your unattended nipple between his forefinger and his thumb while his tongue and teeth mark the skin on your neck. 

"Hell, I've been dying to stuff your mouth with my cock to prevent you from such foul language," the soft whimpers leacving your mouth coax him into taking the hem of your dress and bunching the fabric until his fingers easily find the place in your body calling to him the most through the lace.  It's immediate, how his fingers dampen at the first touch, surprising the both of you, and how your body jolts and an embarrassing sob escapes your throat. "How-how are you this wet? Holy hell, I could just slide right in..."

And as he says that, one of his fingers pull aside the fabric of your underwear and glide into you, so easy. You insides burning while he fingers you, another finger being added with his thumb rubbing circles on your nub. And fuck, you're not sure if you're just too horny and Park Jimin is a magician with his hands, or maybe it's the way he keeps mouthing at your chest and whispering how soaked you are, but you don't think you've ever been so close to cumming in such a short period of time.

"W-whats stopping you?" you manage with a voice that doesn't even resembles yours, but before your hands can even make work of the zipper of his trousers, he pulls his finger out from your center, causing you to whine in protest.

Jimin licks his lips, eyebrows framing the dark expression that his eyes ooze. Although the desire in his eyes is more than evident, it is also evident the faint hesitation in them. Because Park Jimin doesn't do things this way. Park Jimin was raised in a world of correct manners and conservationism. A world that has taught him when and how to act. And as badly as he is dying to fuck you against the wall of Taehyung's ridiculously inmense house, he also wants to do the right thing. 

"Let me take you on a date." 

Park Jimin has been spoiled his whole life. Being born in a well-off family has always provided him of everything he had ever wanted and more. From the innecessary number of toys Santa Claus left under his Christmas tree every year since he was a baby, to his fisrt extravagant sports car at the age of eighteen. Park Jimin has never been a greedy or needy man. How could he, when he's had everything he's ever wished in the palm of his hands. He has never missed anything in his entire life. Hasn't missed a roof over his head, warm food on his plate or brand new designers clothes each week. 

It has taken him two years to control himself. He still remembers that night he first met you, just like he remembers every single time you both had coincided in the same place at the same time. He remembered your scent, had memorized your figure over your pieces of clothing and had tried as best as he could to keep a distance from you because he knew you would never give him the time of day. How could you? You probably despised everything he was because he was definitely nothing like you, and that thought intimidated the fuck out of him. He was a mess everytime you wear nearby. Never relied on his voice because he knew he would stutter if you ever spoke to him, could never trust his eyes because if he ever looked at you he was afraid he wouldn't be able to look away. 

And everytime you spoke, shit, that voice of yours always cursing here and there left him wondering how would you sound in a different setting and if you would still be that badmouthed. More specifically, between his sheets. So he did everything he could to minimize your interactions as much as possible. He just never thought he would come across as such a jerk. It was never his intention to hurt you, and seeing you cry that night (although you denied you did, over and over again) seriously made him realize he wanted to make things right. 

He was trying really, really hard to keep it in his pants, to be the same well composed and controled Park Jimin he had mastered himself to be. 

But that damn dress.

After seeing that little black dress hugging your figure when you started taking off your coat at the restaurant, the brief flash of thigh tights that you accidentaly (or not so accidentally) had blessed him with by crossing a leg over the other, that exposed collarbone calling his name and those heeled sandals with straps wrapping around your ankles, reminding him of the snake tempting Eve, Park Jimin was sure he needed to dig into that apple more than anything he has ever needed before.

That's why he surprises you right after you both finish the second course meal by telling the waitress you won't be having desert, at which you look at him somewhat indignant. But the look he shoots you is enough to make you understand if somebody was going to have desert tonight, it would be him. In his Mercedes. 

"I'm gonna-" you gasp, fingers tugging at the soft strands of his now ruined blond hair, his head between your thighs and your legs thrown over his shoulders. His hands have a grip of the meaty flesh of your ass, holding you firmly againt his mouth as it works wonders on your clit. You're sure it hasn't even been ten minutes since Jimin had opened your legs in the backseat of his car, not even bothering to take your underwear off, simply moving the fabric aside before diving in, and you already feel yourself on the edge of an orgasm.

"I know." voice vibrating right into your core, he slows down his administrations, tongue carefully and delicately lapping at your folds while he enjoys the feeling of your fingers loosening their grip and fondly brushing his hair back. You meet his eyes as he pushes a finger inside your core and your whole body twists in agony. 

"N-no!" 

Jimin stops immediately, lifting his head and focusing his concerned eyes on you. He's about to ask you if he's done anything wrong, but you're fast to roughly pull him up by his hair until his face is leveled with yours. You answer him by kissing him and he returns the kiss with the same eagerness, and now it's your hands that are looking for his cock, palming him through his pants.

"Your dick. Inside. Right Now." you punctuate each phrase with a kiss and he only stops kissing you to pout.

"But I wanted you to cum on my tongue." but still, he's putty in your hands when you undo the botton and the zipper. "Wouldn't you rather me fucking you in my bed, where we're more comfortable?" you notice the slight quivering of his voice when you slide his trousers and boxers down, just enough to pull him out. 

"You can eat me and fuck me as many times as you want tonight, tomorrow and whenever you'd like, but right now..." none of you contain the moan in unision that leaves each of your mouths when just the head of his lenght comes in contact with your entrance. "I really can't wait anymore." brushing your lips over his, you lower your voice. "Wanna get on my hands and knees for you."

Park Jimin has tried to do things the right and appropiate way throughout all his life. He's been a professional from a very young age on how to be in charge of his emotions, his desires and his impulses. Always well mannered and well composed. 

But it's in this moment that Jimin comes to the realization that the only thing that has ever made him lose his mind and self control, is you. Seeing you like this, ass up, grinding your drenched and still thong clad cunt all over his precum dripping lenght, he can't control the way his hand bunches the fabrick of that damn dress over your waist, then flies to your right cheek, a sharp sound of skin filling the air, tearing a gasp from your throat.

"God, I'm-I'm sorry. Couldn't help mys-"

"Do it again."

And he does, the palm of his hand now leaving a reddenning print on your flesh, making you jolt back involuntarily, aligning yourself to the head of his cock and like he had hoped, he slides right in. Not all the way, because Jimin is sure he would cream inside you too soon and he wouldn't be able to forgive himself if he did. He wets his lips, clenching his jaw and dropping his palm one more time, hand more steady and purposeful. 

"You like it rough?" voice hoarse and a hand beside your head holding himself, your back to his chest, twitching beneath him as he soothes the sting with his free one. 

"I like you rough." turning your head slowly to peer at him from the corner of your eye, your hips moving on their own accord trying to take him deeper. Your head is suddenly pulled back harshly, Jimin's fingers tangling in your hair as his own hips close the remaining gap between your bodys in an abrupt thurst. You squeal, Jimin's cock finally filling you up to the hilt just like you wanted him to be, the pleasure making your arms wobble and finding it harder to mantain your balance. 

Jimin's breath fawns over your ear, his tongue darting out to suck on your skin sending chills down your spine. "You're such a dream." he groans, torturously sliding out of your core that's gripping around his shaft for dear life. A whine of protest escapes your lips and he tightens the hold on your hair in response, diving right back in. You fall forward, your arms' strenght betraying you as his thrusts find a new rhythm. With your eyes closed shut, you try to muffle the sound of your voice with the back of your hand as Jimin's lips place soft kisses to your exposed shoulder.

"Don't be quiet." he stands straight, the pull on your hair arching your back in such a enticing way it was Jimin look away for a second, cock buried inside of you and his hips faltering. "Been dying to have you like this for so long."

Another clap of his hand against your right cheek, and a particular stroke of his dick that has you mewling as your climax approached again. "S-so good, Jimin. Oh my god."

"You're gonna cum for me?" his fingertips leave bruises on your skin and the windows of his Mercedes are foggy, just like your mind. You can't concentrate on anything that's not Jimin's cock sliding in and out and how much you wished this had happened way sooner. "Gonna cum for me like a good slut?"

Park Jimin always takes his time. Always does things nice and slow to assure the best outcome possible. 

But he can't contain the acceleration of his hips against yours as your walls clench impossibly tight around his cock, your orgasm finally taking over . Can't contain himself from falling forward again, hand twisting your head in his direction and his mouth searching for yours in a fiery and messy kiss. And he most definitely can't barely contain himself from cumming when your you ask him to spit in your mouth. 

"You're gonna kill me." he breathes, removing himself off you and quickly maneuvering you on your back, his dick finding its way back inside you. Picking up right where he left off, skin slapping against skin in an obscene melody, he collects a considerate amount of saliva in his mouth before dropping it into your welcoming tongue, watching you swallow with a smile he hopes he'll be the only one to see in the future. 

And that's what has the last bit of his self restraint slipping from his fingers. He somehow manages to rip the top of your dress down, fabric tearing until your tits are free and his mouth is attacking your nipples, white strings of his release panting your walls, some of it them oozing out that he fucks back right into you. 

It's between ragged breaths, kisses and tender carresses that Jimin promises you more dates in the future and new dresses that he can't promise not to savage apart again.

[casually-slips-into-coma]

An Essay (sort of) Explaining the Many Grievances I Have With Debbie Gallagher

Once again, Debbie is the fucking worst.

I’ve been wanting to write out my feelings towards her character for a fucking minute now just so that I have a full concise list. Now, I can talk about how Debbie has a constant need for attention, or how her character has become someone unrecognizable in the past few seasons, or how she’s a terrible mother, but what I really want to focus on is the center of my issues with her: her sexuality. Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t about to be a homophobic rant or anything. I just think her queer development has been written terribly and that should be addressed.

Too often I see people praising queer characters or relationships based solely on the fact that they are queer, and as a member of the community, I get it. I am also starved for representation. This, however, does not mean I’m going to settle for annoying, poorly written characters.

Why Make Debbie Queer?

The first thing I want to address is why suddenly develop a WLW storyline for her. Given that Debbie started as a little girl on the show, this gives the writers a lot of opportunity to give a character like that interesting storylines because she does not yet have a solid personality. It gives writers the liberty to take her story anywhere they want to without the constraints of established character because she, as a person, is still developing into adulthood. The show runners unfortunately dropped the ball with this.

From season 4 and onwards was when Debbie began showing interest in dating, sex, and romance having just turned the corner to puberty. From then up until season 9, she has shown exclusive interest in men. It isn’t until Alex the welder that Debbie deviates from this path. Alex is portrayed as a stud who confuses Debbie. I am inclined to believe that Debbie was originally attracted to her because she was masculine and therefore close enough to the people Debbie had previous experience with.

This arc was treated very much as Debbie experimenting with her sexuality, something that Alex also ends up realizing after Debbie tells her that having sex with a girl is “not that bad” and “like having sex with yourself” (S9E4). Once this storyline wrapped up (with Debbie shouting “you make me want cock again”) the writers powered through, adamant about Debbie now being a lesbian.

I have two theories as to why they’ve been fighting so hard for her queerness.

1) This was around the time that Cam was leaving Shameless. This obviously didn’t end up happening, but I was under the impression that the writers were freaking out at losing their token gay character and needed to fill that position. When Cam ended up staying, they were stuck with a queer Debbie storyline and decided to just go with it.

2) Shameless was planning on doing a WLW storyline regardless of Cam’s choice to leave and were originally going to give it to Fiona and her lesbian tenant that she had a close relationship and a lot of chemistry with, but Emmy Rossum wanted to move on from Shameless, and so they pivoted and gave the arc to Debbie, a character that was not supposed to be moved in that direction and so her new sexuality seemingly came out of nowhere. Fiona as a bisexual character would have made sense. Debbie still does not.

Shameless’s Awkward Relationship With Bisexuality

One of the biggest issues I have with Debbie is her insistence on being a lesbian. Lesbianism doesn’t come out of nowhere. Bisexuality, however, can. When you grow up being told that you are supposed to feel attraction to men, and you genuinely do feel attraction to men (which Debbie has expressed in past seasons/episodes) it’s easy to ignore your attraction to women and write it off as something that either isn’t a big deal, or something that isn’t there. It’s a lot more confusing than being strictly at one end of the spectrum. It would have been so much more believable if they had simply made Debbie bisexual. Unsurprisingly, they didn’t because the show has a history with bi erasure.

Bisexuality has been treated badly all throughout Shameless, used as a vengeful plot device back in the earlier seasons where Monica was only ever with women when unmedicated. Then in Season 7 when Ian’s boyfriend Caleb cheated on him with a woman (enforcing the stereotype of bisexuals being unfaithful) Ian, possibly acting out of anger or ignorance, said things like “only women are bisexual. When a man says he’s bisexual he’s really just gay”. The only semi positive bisexual representation on the show was Svetlana and Vee when they were in a poly relationship with Kev (though I also think that storyline wasn’t handled as well as it could’ve been).

This fight against the bisexual label in media is not a new one but it is also a harmful stance to take when writing a sexually fluid character. Debbie declaring that she is, in fact, a lesbian after waxing poetic about how Matty had a big dick and Derek had a great body and knew what he was doing is not the way to go. 

You could argue that Debbie, like many other queer women, is an unfortunate victim of compulsory heterosexuality, but frankly I don’t think the writers are well versed enough in queer theory for that to be a possibility.

Debbie as The White Feminist

Debbie is the pinnacle of white feminism. It’s an unfortunate thought that has occurred to me a few times throughout the show. She talks a big game as a man hater and someone after the equal treatment of women but she herself participates in a lot of problematic and anti feminist behavior.

For one, she r*ped Matty back in season 5 when he was blacked out and unconscious. This was a point in the story that was glossed over and one where she suffered no repercussions other than Matty no longer wanting to be around her. It was explained in the show that Debbie didn’t realize what she did was wrong until after she was explicitly told so because she was maybe 14 when it happened (not 100% on the age Shameless is very inconsistent about timelines). It was treated as somewhat of a punchline, something that Shameless has unfortunately done more than once when referring to male sexual assault (Mickey’s r*pe, Liam in season 10 ((i think??)) and in this latest season, Carl) but that is a different topic. 

There was also the time in which she lied to her boyfriend about being on birth control so she could trap him into a relationship with pregnancy (which also counts as r*pe!!) Good on Derek for getting out of that.

Debbie has also been pro-life in the past. Now I understand this was when Fiona was pressuring her into aborting her pregnancy, and as a pro choicer myself, I believe that Debbie was fully in her right to have bodily autonomy and go through with the pregnancy. This isn’t where the issue lies. It’s when Fiona finds out that she too is pregnant and tells Debbie that she wants an abortion that Debbie accuses her of “killing her baby”. Again, her behavior could be explained by her age given that Debbie was still a young teen during this time.

When her actions as a White Feminist become less excusable is mostly in the latest season. Her relationship with Sandy is one that I’m not really happy with because Debbie doesn’t deserve her.

Recently, it has been revealed that Sandy is actually married to a man and has a son. It’s explained that she was basically married off against her will at the age of 15 to a man twice her age. This implies that the product of the marriage, her son, was most likely conceived through dubious consent (or worse) at the hands of an adult when she was just a kid. Just because Debbie thinks that Sandy’s husband “seems nice” does not give her the right to try and make a victim of grooming feel bad about not wanting to be with her abuser. While I understand that Sandy’s son has no fault in how he came into the world, I’m still gonna side with Sandy when it comes to having to take care of a child she didn’t want and who is most likely a source of trauma for her. It’s not difficult to sympathize with Sandy and see that she’s clearly gone through something fucked up and Debbie, despite claiming to love and support her, AND despite her dumb white feminist arc about wanting equal pay and all that jazz, turns her back on the girls supporting girls aspect of feminism.

This isn’t even mentioning how shitty it was to just leave Franny by herself and assume that one of her siblings would take her to school and pick her up and stuff as if they don’t all have separate lives. She talks a lot about being a good mother but decided to “let off some steam” by fucking off to a gay bar to get loaded on coke and fuck a gay man (which wtf thats not a thing that really happens with casual coke but whatever I guess). Once she realized she fucked up, instead of taking responsibility she decided to paint herself as the victim as well as spew offensive bullshit about how she “probably has AIDS now” because of her sexual encounter with a gay man. No lesbian in their right fucking mind would ever say that because as members of the LGBTQ+ community, you are at least a tiny bit informed as to how devastating and tragic the AIDS crisis was for queer people.

(I also have an issue with how Debbie capitalized on her felony as a sex offender and her sexuality to start her Hot Lesbian Convict business but I think that’s enough said.)

Blame the writers

The show got almost an entirely new cast of writers after season 7 which is why the show feels more like a sitcom with low stakes and no consequences rather than a drama, but if there is a queer writer on the team it’s not very evident. Even the better half of the queer relationship story, Ian and Mickey, I don’t feel has really been done justice since the change in writers. It’s just become painfully obvious that the actress is a straight girl playing a gay character (not to mention I have never seen any chemistry between her and all of her female love interests). I don’t fault Emma Kenney (the actress) for this. I actually really like her as a person and I like the videos she makes about the cast and such, and I think she does her best with the script she’s given. My complaints with Debbie are targeted entirely towards the writers.

This brings me to my final point. I need them to let Debbie be alone. Her whole thing for the second half of the season has been that she clearly has abandonment issues and is afraid of being alone. It’s why she’s so adamant about keeping the house and fighting with Lip about it (I’m actually on Debbie’s side for that one but that’s besides the point). They had her and Sandy break up which leaves Debbie to spiral further into her loneliness. From a writing point of view, it makes sense to take this opportunity to give her an arc in which she can overcome that and feel comfortable with herself so that she can move on as an adult instead of jumping into a new relationship. This is especially true since this is quite literally the last season ever of the show and any character development needs to be wrapped up. Introducing a new character out of nowhere does not give the viewers enough time to actually get invested in the new relationship. It’s also unfair to Debbie’s character because her arc is going to feel incomplete.

Anyway,,,,,,uuuhhhhh,,,,,feel free to add on if u want lmao

[gayenerd]

Interview with Billie for the Kerrang Yearbook. Sounds like this took place around 2000-2001?

Hello Billie Joe. A bit pissed at the Kerrang Awards weren't you? "I was drinking with Papa Roach the night before. Everybody went to see The Cult in Brixton. All the American bands like Papa Roach and Queens Of The Stone Age were there. I felt terrible when I got out of bed to go to the Kerrang Awards." Who ended up worse off - you or Coby Dick? "Sometimes Coby can't even hold it together when he's sober! He's super-hyper all the time. You have to say, 'Coby, turn it off for 2 minutes - I'm in my bunk!' Then he'll turn it off and you can get into a decent conversation." You experienced some difficulty in getting off the stage after accepting your Kerrang Award. "Award's shows freak me out - I'm so scared shitless of those things so I end up doing stupid things. I never theought I'd ever win an award for playing music. Watching all our videos being shown up on the screen, I just looked at Mike and Tre and said. 'Does this mean we're old now?' I can be such a self-conscious freak. I just don't know how to be cool." What's the healthiest thing you've done this year? "I like to keep myself fit. I run, I skateboard, and i'll hit the weights every other day. You reach a certain age when you've gotta start looking out for yourself. I'm staring down the barrel of 30, you know? My dad really let himself fall to @#%$ and I don't want to end up like that. Theres a preconcieved idea about musicians and punk musicians in particular that we have to self-destruct, and I can't buy into that. I like to breathe. Like like it when my heart beats - Its a really cool thing." Have you cut down on your drinking recently? "When i'm on tour I drink all day long with the guys. There's nothing else to do. But i've been at homea while. There are many, many moods to Billie Joe. There's drunk me and theres not-drunk me." What have you learned about being a father during the past year? "You learn new things every day as your kids' characters and personalities are building. Joey is 6 now, he's not a baby at all, he's a little boy. And Jacob, who's 3, is a maniac. The one rule I have is that I never expose them to television." What have you learned about Tre and Mike this past year? "Wow (long pause). I learned that Mike is a Bob Dylan fan, which was kind of suprising. I'm not the biggest fan but I definately appreciate Bob Dylan. And Tre is becoming really fluent in Spanish. His wife is Nicaraguan." What color has your hair been this year? "I shaved my head when I got off the road. Its been black. I haven't really been changing it. When the boy groups started dyeing their hair, I had to stop." Any fashion tips you'd care to pass on to Kerrang readers? "I've been wearing the same pants since High School! Never been into the Versace thing." Best punk rock song you've heard this year? "Last Nite by The Strokes. They're not really a punk band, but those guys have a really cool outlook and a good sensibility about how they present themselves. All the rap rock metal bands have lost that rock'n'roll element, and i'm just a sucker for good rock'n'roll music." What song has been stuck in your head this year, even though you hate it? "Smooth Criminal by Alien Ant Farm. It was bad when Michael Jackson sang it, but it's even worse second time around! Y'know, I think Michael Jackson should join Slipknot. His face looks so bizarre now, its like he's wearing a mask." Are Slipknot still the scariest dudes in rock? "In about a year from now, if they're still as popular as they are now, they'll be as American as apple pie. That's sort of what happened to Marilyn Manson. When he came out he was really scary looking, like 'Jesus Christ! This guy is a maniac!' But now its, 'Oh, theres Marilyn, mowing the lawn, no big deal.' I like Manson, but it's funny how the most normal people end up being the most threatening, and the people who are scariest at first end up kinda normal. That's the dissapointing thing about shock value. Neil Young is more threatening than Slipknot just because he's smarter and has more of an opinion." How much fun did you have on tour in 2001? "It's really exciting at first because you're in different places every day, but after a while i'd rather be home. I get into really long conversations with my wife, I talk to my kids a lot, I'll write little notes and draw pictures for them and fax them to the house. Our sets are getting longer, sometimes we'll play up to three hours, and its because there is no rock'n'roll lifestyle for me other than that. I'm a devoted husband and a devoted father, and so all that decadent bullshit is not my thing. You start to wonder, 'Is this the life for me?' But then I get home and I dont know what the @#%$ to do with myself because i'm not playing music. People have looked at us and gone, 'Obviously these guys have no place to go after the gig because they're still on stage!'" Where were you on September 11? "I was on West Coast time, so it was really early in the morning for me. I saw the towers fall, and it felt like the world was gonna end. What amazes me is that Tony Blair is almost heading the coalition by himself! Does he realise what he's getting his country into? This is @#%$ serious! There's been a lot of shocking words used: the 'crusade against terrorism'. The las thing you say to someone from the Middle East is the word 'crusade'." After September 11, do you share America's renewed sense of patriotism? "No way. I can't really see myself as a patriot. I don't see what happened in New York as an act of war, it's an act of terrorism. Every country has had to deal with terrorism in some form, and this is the first time America has ever seen it and they dont know what to do, so everyone is clinging to these war slogans. All the flags is people's cars and homes - it just seems kind of gross to me." Has American learnt from the tragedy? "I hope some good stuff comes out of this. People have become so self-absorbed and dedicated to their careers. I'm not a person to wave a flag for family values or anything like that, but there comes a time when your relationships and your family is the most important thing, not whether you're making $100,000 every year. Thats what I hope comes out of it - that people realise the important things in life." Six Of The Best Best Friend: " Valium. Lots of plane flights, man. Valium only lasts four hours, so if you're on an 11 hour flight take two and a half." Best advice: "Put your head between your knees if you think you are gonna pass out." Best Ass: "Tre Cool. Not only because he has one, but because he is one." Personal Best: The pinnacle moment for me this year, musically, was playing Reading. It was a great show. There's so many bands nowadays who can't play live, but to actually do it and have people singing along and getting something sentimental out of it at the same time, thats rare, and we achieved that at Reading." Best Night Out: "The furst night I went out after september 11. I really went for it. American has these feelings of its days being numbered. It's like a country that has just got cancer, but the cancer's in remission. A lot of people are doing all the things they've always talked about doing. I hadn't partied really hard in a while, so that's what I did. I went to a couple of bars with Mike and Tre and our producer. We got loud and had a good time." Best Buy: " My cellphone. The ring tone is just a goofy tune. And it vibrates well in my pocket."

[league-of-thots]

The Summoning

Pairing: dabi x reader x hawks

Word Count: 8.1k

Warnings: NONCON/DUBCON, blood play, dp, sacrificial summoning, mind manipulation, angels/demons/magic, gore, branding

A/N: So this was supposed to be a short little fic.... but thats not how it turned out, but im happy that it came out this way. I think its much better than what I originally had. Uh, please read the warnings because this has some things which could definitely be triggering.

thanks to @lady-bakuhoe, @ikinabi, and @marilla-eldriana for listening to me talk my ass off about it LMAO

other tags: @yaoyorozuwrites, @dee-madwriter

               You were beyond upset, tonight wasn’t supposed to be a night where you were heading into a bar on your own, dressed up for a date cut early, and freshly out of a relationship. As you sat down at the end of a rowdy bar, you can’t help the tears flowing out of your eyes. You’ve been holding them in for a while, trying not to break down in public, but sitting here with nothing else to do, you can’t stop the small sobs that break out.

               The bartender makes her way towards you, her lips turned down sadly as she starts cleaning up some glasses at the sink near you methodically. Your sobs die down as she starts speaking to you.

               “Rough night, sis?”

               “Yeah, you could say that again.”

               “Need something to drown it out?” you nod as she goes to grab some heavy liquid you can’t recognize. Whatever it is, it smells rank, you think as you lift the shot glass up towards your nose to sniff it.  You shoot it back, and shudder at the brief taste you get before you swallow it down, throat burning a bit as you let out a slight cough. She offers another with a gesture and you nod in response, quickly downing the second, and you nurse the third.

               Suddenly, a man in a raggedy black overcoat sits down beside you, raising a finger as he asks for some type of sake, and says “One for the crying mess, too.” In a raspy voice. You don’t even feel offended, it’s true, but he didn’t need to say it so harshly right in front of you. Although you wouldn’t say no to the free drink, as you quickly drained the one that you’d bought.

               “Thanks,” you mumble to him, the alcohol not really hitting you yet. You wipe the tears from your face. “What’s your name?”

               “Dabi.” He answers shortly, grabbing the sake and tipping it back, watching as you do the same. “You’re new here, but drinking like you’re about to be enlisted. What’s up?”

               Now normally, you wouldn’t be giving your life story to a random stranger who- quite frankly- looked like he belonged in a prison cell. However, normally you didn’t have four generous shots of heavy liquor coursing through your veins after having just broken up with your last boyfriend of just over a year.

               “Stupid asshat of a guy dumps me after over a year of being together for some stupid reason.” You sigh, head in your hands. “I don’t even get why? Like I was so blindsided and I feel like such a fucking idiot.”

               “Sounds like a real idiot,” Dabi replies, sliding you another drink which you eagerly accept, drinking it in a rage.

               “Like, fuck, I’m just not ready yet! Like, yeah if he was hard, I’d help him deal with it. But I just didn’t feel ready for sex, and he kept trying to force me, and when I get mad at that I’m the bad guy.” You’re starting to get a little dizzy, but at the moment, you’re so upset that you can’t really be bothered by it. You just want to be angry and heartbroken and drunk for a little while. So you don’t really have to face moving out of your shared apartment until later, tomorrow at the earliest.

                 “Was it a one-off thing? ‘Cause that’s a bit of an overreaction if that’s the case.” You’re so happy to have someone to vent too that you don’t notice the intent expression Dabi has on his face, you miss the way his body leans towards you eagerly waiting for an answer.

               “Well, no.” you shift a bit uncomfortable in your seat. “But he said he was fine with it! That he was alright with waiting.”

               “Well obviously he was lying. You must’ve been really stingy with sex.” You shouldn’t feel that hurt by a stranger’s words, especially when he has no idea about who you are and what your story was.

               “I just didn’t want my first time to be forced onto me.” You mumble, looking into your glass. You were starting to feel the dizziness from the rapidly consumed drinks. “I wasn’t ready for it.” You could feel the tears welling up again, not even bothering to try and stop them.

               “Makes sense. So, you’re a virgin then? And your boyfriend wanted to have sex and you didn’t so he broke up with you?” The odd phrasing of the questions didn’t even stand out to you.

               “Yes! Except he said it was fine and I believed him!” you wail out, you’re crying hard now into your arms that are lain on the bar top. You feel a hesitant hand patting your shoulder rather awkwardly, but his hand is really warm and you feel a bit better at the soft contact.

               “Sounds like a real idiot to me. You want another drink, doll?” he says softly into your ear. His breath tickles your neck a bit and you giggle a bit as you sway on your stool.

               “I don’t have the money! Ahaha… I’ve gotta save it now because I have to move out of the stupid apartment.”

               “Don’t worry, I have some money to spend. What better way to spend it than on a pretty girl, hmm?” You blush a little at the attention. His blue eyes are intense and you can’t keep eye contact for long with him.

               “I mean, if you’d like too, I won’t stop you.” You hum.

               “Alright then.” He gestures to the bartender, a dangerous grin on his face. You thought that you’d be spending the night alone, but you’re glad to have been proven wrong.

               The two of you nurse some drinks as you talk a bit, most of the talking done by you, the alcohol loosening your mouth as you tell him a lot of your time with your ex, and whatever random thought pops into your head. He doesn’t talk much, but it’s not really off-putting as he usually interjects with sarcastic one liners and small questions, nodding as you continue your stories.

               It’s getting later in the night and you’re blissfully drunk, unable to process the shitty feelings and how terrible you feel. Dabi seems to notice this and gets one of those grins he gets when you say how bad you want to fucking deck your ex in the face. It makes your heart beat in excitement.

               “You’ll do shots with me, right?” You nod, excited. Dabi orders six drinks, and you feel yourself tense in sudden apprehension. That’s a lot considering that you’d already drank a few… how many was it now? It doesn’t matter, you tell yourself. He seems to notice your hesitance though.

               “What? Can’t handle a few shots?” his smile is teasing, but his words are daring you to agree with him, and you bristle in response.

               “Of course I can!” part of you is screaming at you, telling you how bad of an idea this is, but its easy to drown out in the haze of your mind.

               “Good, you can try to keep up with me then.” He shoots down the first without even warning and you scramble to catch up with him, grabbing the glass sitting in front of you, and tossing the drink back. You’re coughing a bit, the harshness of the shot winning against your already weakened and sensitive throat. Boldly you grab the next and shoot it down as well.

               That might’ve been a mistake, because you splutter more, you can barely think, and you feel like you’re choking on the air you’re breathing in. Dabi’s face looks concerned as he asks you if you’re alright. You can only shake your head in response, knowing that you can’t possibly try to talk like this. He sees you swaying and clutching your now stomach as it rolls nauseatingly.

               “Don’t worry, this is on me, I thought she was alright with them.” He’s speaking to the bartender, who looks worried and a little suspicious given his appearance, but his voice sounds like its in the end of a long tunnel to you. You accept being pulled into his arms as he leads you outside for some fresh air, he’s produced a bottle of water, and opens it one handed before handing it to you.

               You try to thank him but that goes terribly, as you start dry heaving when you open your mouth. He has a sad, but un-surprised look on his face as he takes in your motions. If you were focused enough you probably would’ve said he looked satisfied, but that doesn’t make sense because he has no idea who you are.

               Suddenly, everything starts spinning and you vaguely feel Dabi place your arm over his shoulder. You close your eyes, desperate to try and stop yourself from vomiting all over the man who was trying to help you. It’s your main focus as you lean almost all of your weight onto him and drag your feet across the pavement. You don’t know where he’s taking you but you can barely think much less stop him and you continue to keep your eyes closed, not worried at all.

                  Dabi couldn’t believe his luck meeting you. He’d just finished the final touches on the circle, he was practically all set up except for the link, the sacrifice. Of course, he’d been planning to go into bars to find the perfect person for his ritual, but he didn’t think it would’ve happened so quickly! He’d expected it to take months, and what a relief it was that it hadn’t! He can barely contain his excitement as he keeps your form tight to his body.

               You were so naïve, so trusting, latching onto the first person that offered you kindness. Getting drunk on your own in a rather sketchy bar on a Saturday night, what had you been thinking? He knew you’d had a shitty day, but getting drunk at home surely would’ve been the superior option, anyone could see that.

               It’s a decent walk to his place unfortunately, he knows that the usual 20-minute walk will likely double with you barely able to stand, much less walk quickly. So, he sighs and reminds himself exactly why this is so important. Why he’s even bothering to ‘save’ your pathetic form.

               The runs and sigils are going to look fucking gorgeous carved into your body, he thinks, still dragging you along. You’re almost to the point of unconsciousness, he notices, and it might be easier for him if you were unconscious. At least then he wouldn’t have to be concerned for how he drags you. The pitiful whimpering noises are so annoying to listen to, so he moved slow enough that you could sort of drag yourself and not make those noises.

               Dabi keeps running through the steps in his head, the rituals, the incantations, and the carvings…. He knew he was a powerful castor. He could only hope that the practice he’d put in, the training he’d put in and the beautiful and pure sacrifice he’d found would be enough to actually summon Satan.

               He knows with the power boost he could finally rid the world of his wretched father. Could finally get rid of him and his stupid fucking followers and coven.

               He’d take them all. And he’d win, he knew it.

               He’s finally dragged you to his apartment, and at this point you’re barely conscious in his arms. Good, it would make the carvings so much easier with you unable to struggle. Plus, with the fact that the alcohol would cloud your senses so you’d feel less pain and make less noise. He wonders if you’re even going to understand what’s happening to you, if you’re going to cry out in fear and confusion. He can’t even lie, the idea of that makes him feel a warmth down in his core, makes him start to feel hard, god, he bets your screams will sound as pretty as you are.

               He has one of the only basement rooms in the apartment, the other two abandoned because of how cold and dirty it is down there, plus there was only cold water that ran down in the basement. However, it was secluded and quiet there, and that’s exactly what Dabi needed in a place. Somewhere where he could lay low while he bides his time, planning and training and waiting. He wasn’t originally a patient person, but he’d learned to be, and it was something that he was proud of.

               Luckily, he doesn’t have to explain to any of his upstairs neighbours why he’s dragging you across the lobby to the back set of stairs that only lead down to the concrete hall downstairs. He’s gotten a pretty large space in his basement room, especially with the way he’s completely emptied his living room. The couch is pushed against the wall, table and tv also against the wall leaving a large rug on the floor. The lucky part was that he didn’t ever have a ton of possessions, so it was rather easy for him to make the circle on the floor and cover it with a large goat-skin rug.

               He doesn’t have many chairs, only the ones at the small bar behind which his kitchen is located, so he tosses you onto the leather couch on your side in case you were to vomit. He can’t have you dying before he sacrifices you after all. He checks to make sure that you’re really out of it before he goes into his washroom to start cleaning himself and preparing his mind for the layers of spell he’s about to cast.

               He’s started clearing his mind as he walks into his room, crystals glistening even in the non-natural light, as he starts to slow his breathing in a rather deep and slow pattern. He feels himself start to go into a state he can only get into when he’s concentrating on magic. All his troubles seem to slip away as he steps into the warm running water. He keeps the sigils he’s going to be needing soon in mind as he washes away all the dirt and grime from the bar, washing away all the petty crime to get prepared for something far, far worse.

               When he’s towelled off, he puts on some cotton boxers, and soft grey pants, leaving himself shirtless in the chilling air. He feels the goosebumps start to creep up his arms as he grabs the old iron lighter, the only gift from his mother that he’d manage to take with him when he had to get out with his life after his father had found out what he’d done.

               You’re pretty much asleep on the couch when he comes out, and he looks over you, your innocent form, so fucking pleased at the sacrifice he’d managed to snatch. Turning away, he starts to take out some candles that he has stashed in the wooden chest beside his couch, the colours he uses going to be black, purple and red.

               After moving the carpet off, he places the candles in groups of three at the points and nodes of the circled star. Afterwards, he grabs the red chalk he has and starts to write the various Latin incantations around the circle. He ignores your soft snores, you seem to be mumbling something in your sleep, as he continues his work. It’s taking a lot more time than he’d like it to.

               But soon enough, he thinks, it’ll all be worth it.

                 You feel yourself lifted into the air, your head spinning even before you even open your eyes. Where are you? What’s happening? You try to open your eyes, but it’s so nauseating and disorienting seeing the dark room spinning around, you’re sure you’ve never been in before. You feel yourself lowered onto the ground, rather roughly. You keep your eyes closed trying to wait out the dizzy spell as you hear the click of a lighter, and you shudder, expecting to feel a sting of burning flames.

               But you don’t, and you hear the clicking a few more times. You start to feel a little more stable and you squint, trying to see what’s happening. You try and sit up, but you can’t with your dexterity hindered by the alcohol, and your wrists and ankles bound in ropes. You start to panic slightly, the last thing you can remember is accepting a few drinks from a man, Dabi wasn’t it?

               “Oh, you’re up. That’s good, you need to be conscious for this part.” Speak of the devil and there he shall appear. You feel a surge of fear as you turn your head towards the man.

               “What did you do? Why am I here?” you stumble, trying to cut through the fog in your head.

               “More like what did you do? Who goes out on their own in a sketchy part of town late at night? You were practically begging for something bad to happen to you.” You notice that he’s half naked and you shudder, remembering what you’d told him before and you get a terrible feeling in your gut.

               “No I wasn’t! I just wanted the night to not be complete shit!” You desperately search for anything in your reach that you could use to get yourself out of this situation. You can’t even roll away, you notice that there are iron pegs nailed into the ground and you are tied to those. You want to cry, you don’t know what you did to deserve this.

               “Well, you should’ve just stayed at home,” you hear a knife being pulled out of a holder, and in the corner of your eye you can see Dabi heating the blade against a large gas flame. It’s a twisted knife, the three sides a blue and black metal with a small skull on the end of the hilt. The metal is glowing red hot at the parts where it had been heated though.

               You squirm away from him as much as you can in your restraints when he kneels in front of you with the knife in his hand. “Stop fucking wiggling, It’ll hurt you more because I will nail you to the fucking floor if there’s a chance of me messing these up because of you.” You stop your motions, not wanting whatever’s coming to be made worse. So instead, you start screaming as loud as you can for help, the desperation in your tone evident.

               He just throws his head back in mad laughter at that. “Keep on screaming! I haven’t even started the fun bit yet baby! Nobody can hear you down here you know? It’s utterly fucking pointless for you to cry for help. But please go on, it makes me feel soooo good.”

               You feel your eyes widen in horror looking at the man’s face. He’s still oddly attractive, the flames giving his face sharper shadows, making him look almost inhuman. You’ve never wanted to disappear from someone’s gaze so badly before.

               You shudder as you feel his cold hand push you over and down on your stomach. How are you supposed to get out of there when you’re lying on your stomach with him pressing his weight into you.

               You are mid thought when the first lick of iron hot metal is brought onto your back. You cry out in surprise and pain, the knife tugging at your muscles and you can feel the ridges it has. Tears spring to your eyes, but it doesn’t seem to hurt as much as you would’ve thought, it must be all the alcohol still coursing its way through your system.

               You can’t focus on the words he’s murmuring as he continues to slice designs with purpose into your back. He laughs whenever you let out a vicious scream and you can’t see his face but you can tell he’s enjoying the process immensely.

               “Shirt’s getting in the way of the rest of it sweetheart, guess it’s time to take it off now.” He’s so smug which makes you feel humiliated as you press your head into the ground trying to put yourself together. You whimper as you feel your shirt lifted and hear the fabric tearing.

               You’re now shivering half naked on the cold concrete floor and starting to lose your grip on reality as the pain sends you drifting in and out of consciousness. You feel sharp pain as he starts designing up your spine, humming a bit as he goes. Why’d you have to meet a psychopath tonight? Wasn’t your luck just so shitty lately.

               You lose track of time as he works, you’re pretty sure that you lose consciousness for most of it, but luckily Dabi doesn’t wake you up for it. However, when you do come to, you notice how badly your throat hurts, you must’ve been screaming a lot for that to happen.

               “You ready for the front now? Then we can finally get the real thing started.”

               “Please, isn’t there enough? I don’t want anymore stop please! Just let me go.” You try pleading with him, knowing it’s probably not going to work. He doesn’t even deign you with response to your pathetic attempt. Instead he flips you over, your hands now positioned up above your head.

               Your limbs feel like lead, and you feel as if all your energy has been draining out of you along with the blood that’s come oozing out of your wounds. You can’t move, you’re stuck and all you can do is look at the man doing this to you and seethe in anger and hatred. His eyes seem to be burning with bright blue flames, but surely that must be you hallucinating? People’s eyes don’t glow.

               “Finally,” he breathes out as he leans back and admires his handiwork. He’s looking at you with blown open eyes, erection prominent and you can see the outline through his sweatpants. “Now it’s just to call him while I carve my name into your chest. You’re gonna spell it out for me, got that doll? Or else I can start working on the other bits of skin.”

               You just want it over with at this point, you’ll go along with his idea just so you can finally get out. “Fine.” You whisper, resigned to it at this point.

               “D.” He must’ve heated up the knife again, because it burns more than it did before and you scream your throat raw as he carves this much deeper that the other markings.

               “A!” you screech, hoping it ends soon, at least he has a short name.

               “B!” your voice cracks in your agony and your chest is aching.

               “I!” you sob, tears streaming down your face again as feel your body go completely limp as you succumb to darkness once again.

                 Dabi tries to get his breathing in control, looking at your broken and bleeding form. He’s never felt this aroused by someone, and he was right, your screams were like an orchestra playing the most beautiful music he’s ever heard.

               But that was a bonus. It was time for the summoning, and so it was time to focus and go through it. He slices his left palm, your blood mixing with his before he lets it spill over, mesmerized by how it drip, drip, drips onto the stained concrete. One last incantation that he has to say, and he hasn’t been this excited since he’d first found out he was a castor, and that he was a pretty powerful one at that.

               He waits anxiously in silence, eyes on you as more blood oozes from all the markings, there’s thin linking of red all around the cuts. He wishes that the sacrifice didn’t require a virgin because he desperately wanted to take it from you himself.

               Lost in his thoughts, the sudden burst of wind that erupts from the centre of the circle, from under your form blows out all the candles.

               “Well, aren’t you an ambitious one. Trying to summon Satan all on your own.” Dabi jerks around at the lilting voice from behind him, somehow, it’s both amused and condescending at the same time, and Dabi bristles at it.

               “You aren’t powerful enough to be him, I didn’t summon you.” His teeth are grinding in frustration.

               “So rude, and we’ve only just met! Look kid, you don’t have the power or the numbers to summon Satan right now, but I’m the highest-level under-creature you could get.” His eyes seem to glow gold in the darkness, they light up his sharp features.

               Dabi lets out a growl with a few curses. “Whatever, that doesn’t matter, I knew it was a long shot. You said you were the highest I could get. How high is that?” His grin is devious as he hears the question.

               “I’m Hawks, fallen angel at your service. As for how high I am? I’m in the 5th level range.” Dabi whistles at that. “So, does that mean you’re going to strike a deal with me? I haven’t gotten a serious one in a while. It’s getting seriously boring down there.”

               “You should be able to lend me the amount of firepower I’d need for it. What are your terms, and how does the transfer work in your deals?” he grins showing off his fangs a bit as he cages Dabi in a bit despite being shorter, wings making him seem much larger though.

               “Here’s the fun part, because I’m a fallen angel, it works a little differently! My powers got corrupted so that sacrifice you have there – oh she’s an actual virgin! – is going to be your ticket to my powers.”

               “So, I have to keep her safe?”

               He shrugs, “You asked, I’m just telling you friend. Obviously, the price is the same as any other deal.”

               “Obviously.”

               “So, you’re prepared for that? Hell isn’t as nice as you’d think.”

               “No shit Sherlock, but don’t worry, I’ve thought it through a fair bit.” Hawks laughs at that.

               “Alright! Since my fall was lust based, the power transfer is too, if you catch my drift.” Hawks says with a raised eyebrow.

               “….sort of?”

               “Oh my god, are you an idiot?”

               “I don’t want to hear that from you, chicken man.” Dabi just wants this over with, he’s getting a little antsy. “Can we get started already?”

               “Alright then, time to wake up sleeping beauty over there.”

                 You feel yourself being blearily shaken awake, and you’re shocked to see a different face than Dabi’s in front of you. He’s gorgeous, and his wings, despite being an eerie dark red, are full and look so soft. Blearily, you try to reach up to try and feel them, forgetting that your hands are tied to the peg on the floor. The man looks at you with pity and amusement.

               “Hey there, I’m Hawks, are you ready to become a human magic battery?” he says cheerily, words much at odds with his words and expression.

               “What, no, what’s going on? Please there’s a man here – Dabi – and he’s kidnapped me! You have to help me out, call the police, why are you smiling?” You feel the tiny bit of hope that had grown up come crashing down as you observed the – man? Angel? – who called himself Hawks.

               “Yeah, my friend Dabi and I have a little arrangement here. You know what I am right? You should know that struggling is useless. Just lay back and enjoy the ride, baby.” His eyes pierce your soul and you find yourself unable to even think of a response to that.

               You don’t even completely realize what that means until he starts nuzzling your neck as his hands go towards your tits, starting to play with your pebbled nipples, his hands surprisingly warm.

               “No please, I don’t want that…” you say weakly, completely spent already from the ordeal that Dabi had put you through. “I just want to go home!” you’re so delirious from pain and the small bits of pleasure you’re trying to pretend aren’t happening at Hawks’ toying with you.

               “Too bad little bird, you don’t really have a say in the matter at the moment.” He bites down on your neck hard, drawing blood which he then licks up. “So, fucking good! Haven’t been able to do this in so long.” He’s grinding into you, the layers of fabric bringing you stimulation and pleasure as you moan, immediately tensing up in embarrassment and shame.

               “Don’t be like that, I always make people feel good like this, so just relax.” His eyes are glowing and as you look into them, you feel yourself relaxing a bit. Maybe you should relax, he definitely knows what he’s doing, you can feel the heat building in your core and your hazy mind start to lose focus. His eyes, are just so fucking beautiful, and the way his fingers are moving feel amazing.

               He turns his head down, lapping lightly at your breast. His tongue is warm, but the metal stud on his tongue makes you moan out in delight.

               “Oh so you do like it!” he exclaims brightly. “Let’s get this started now baby.” Your mind is still screaming at you that this is wrong, that you don’t want this, that you need to struggle and get free. With all the distractions in your mind, its so deliciously easy to fall into a hazy daydream like trance as he licks up the blood from your wounds. His tongue makes it feel so, so good. He switches breasts, tugging on your nipples as you mewl in delight. Once you let go, everything was so much better!

               He sucks bruises onto your hips, nipping at them with his sharpened fangs. “Oi, don’t enjoy yourself too much there Dabi, you gotta go a round too after.” You turn to see Dabi stretched out like a cat on his couch, his cock out of his pants as he languidly strokes it. It’s pierced and you find yourself imagining how it would feel scraping your walls.

               There was only one thing bothering you, and it was that everywhere Hawks touched grew hotter and hotter, not in an unpleasant way, more in an antsy, wanting to move and run mood. You felt like you were vibrating and you didn’t understand it. But you couldn’t bring yourself to care as your jaw dropped when the angel ripped off your bottoms harshly.

               “Let’s see if you taste as good as the other humans I’ve devoured.” He rips the ankle restraints as he tosses your knees over his shoulders and licks a stripe up your pussy. You shudder at the new sensation, biting on your lip to stifle your moan.

               He sees that as a challenge and spends his time tasting your juices along his tongue, his eyes seemingly brighter as he works at your pussy, teasing your clit with his tongue stud. He keeps working at you with single minded determination, teasing your hole with his sharp nail and you let out a squeak, which quickly turns into a groan as he slides his finger in. He adds a second as soon as he can, loving hearing the sounds your pussy makes as he scissors you open.

               You’ve never felt this good in your life, you can barely tell what’s happening, but you feel waves of pleasure as you feel his tightening in your lower belly.

               “You’re getting close, huh?” Hawks brings his face up, eyes lidded as he licks the juices around his mouth. “Do you want to cum?”

               “Yes!”

               “Well, I don’t know, you were pretty awful to my business partner over there… maybe I shouldn’t let you cum.” He brings his second hand up to his face, lightly scratching at his scruff, and you begin to panic. You have this insatiable need, you don’t know where it came from, but it’s not letting you think at all. There’s this voice yelling at you that it’s Hawks’ fault, but he’s literally an angel. How could he be doing something so disgusting to you?

               So you open your mouth, “Please let me cum, I’ll be so good for you sir! I didn’t mean to be awful to him, I just didn’t understand what he was trying to do!”

               “That’s fucking right.” There’s a sudden intensity in his eyes that makes you feel like your heart’s stopped. “You didn’t know what you were doing. I’m your guardian angel after all, and I came here because you were going to make a mistake that would put you in danger.”

               “Oh my god…” the horror you feel chokes your throat, yet it doesn’t rid you of the incessant need that’s been plaguing you.

               “Would your guardian angel ever steer you wrong, Y/N?” he grabs your chin, nails cutting shallowly when he presses.

               “No, you wouldn’t!” you shake your head, trying to convey exactly how much you were repenting.

               “So, listen carefully little lady. This is important.” He waits for your assent before he continues. “You’re in a very dangerous spot, so I needed a friend here to help you out, he’s going to keep you nice and safe. All you have to do in return is let yourself have some fun, some pleasure in your life. I mean, you’re begging for that exact pleasure right now.”

               There’s a little niggling at the back of your head, it’s telling you how good you’ll be treated, you’ll be loved and accepted. You start to shake it off, but you can’t when it tells you that nobody will ever make you feel good like this, who would want too? Here you have two beings ready to make you feel good like you’ve never felt before and you’re denying them?

               “Of course, that sounds like a great idea Mr. Hawks.”

               “Alright, what a good girl, see Dabi? Isn’t she great?”

               “I knew I’d gotten lucky, but I didn’t realize how lucky until now.” The grin on his face is satisfied, but as you look longer, the more you see the pleasure and happiness he feels too.

               “Do I get to cum now? You keep saying how good I am…” you don’t remember thinking about saying that, but the words seem to come out on their own accord.

               In response Hawks goes back to your neglected pussy and starts thrusting his fingers into a spot inside you that makes you gasp in surprise. With all the swirling emotions and pain and alcohol you feel yourself tighten and let loose quickly, hitting your high in ecstasy. Your back arches, and somewhere in the back of your mind, you notice that your shoulders have definitely been scratched up badly.

               But why care when you feel so good now?

               Your eyes are closed as you lie there, battered and cut and so blissed out as Hawks removes his pants and looks around.

               “You didn’t bring lube?” he directs the question to Dabi.

               “You need that? I thought you had like, magic and shit.”

               Hawks swallows his annoyance, “I’m in a mortal form dipshit. Channeling divine or corrupt energy is hard to do without fucking blowing myself up.”

               Dabi just shrugs. “I mean to be fair; I didn’t know I was getting some angel that got kicked out of heaven for being horny. Or else I definitely would’ve bought some.”

               “Whatever,” he mutters. “I like this way better.” You hear the conversation, but can’t be bothered to really understand what they’re saying. All you know is that you feel someone leaning above you.

               Hawks takes a feather from his wings, carefully turning it in his hands. “Now, I’m not going to lie, this is going to hurt a bit. But I’ll make you feel so good you won’t even remember it, alright?” You nod along blearily, barely hearing him.

               He grins and slices a long line right above your hip, and you barely feel it being so numb. You do feel his fingers pressing into the cut though, and you try to squirm away, but that just makes him slam you down with his other hand in a surprising show of force for his physique. It feels so wrong when you feel him wiggle his fingers a bit inside your skin, and you shut your eyes so you don’t have to see it. Apparently, that amuses Dabi, who starts guffawing off to the side somewhere. The pain brings up all off the fear you’ve been feeling the whole night, and it shocks you. You start screaming, begging to be let go hysterically while you see Hawks, his hand covered in your blood, fisting his length, mixing some of the precum with it.

               “I thought you said you were going to behave.” He growls and you feel an intense pressure on your mind for a second before your fear starts to fade away easily. “Much better.” He says to your relaxing form.

               “You gotta teach me how to do that,” Dabi comments, which just has Hawks rolling his eyes.

               “Shut up and let me enjoy this, I haven’t had sex in so long, warlock.” That elicits a snort from Dabi as he settles back down.

               He lines up his cock with your slick entrance, teasing a bit as the blood and your juices mix together and it lets him start to work his way inside of you. You’re panting, fingers scrabbling at everything they can reach as he pushes through. You feel a mix of pain and pleasure as he pushes all the way into you. He surprisingly lets you adjust, breathing heavily as your walls squeeze intensely around the intrusion.

               It feels so, so good though and Hawks can tell that’s how you feel as he grins and moves your legs up and around his hips. You whine as he stretches you out more with the new position, and he grunts a bit as he starts thrusting his hips, dragging his sharpened nails down your side without breaking the skin. He puts his head to your neck, pressing open mouth kisses there that make you relax around him, and as soon as he feels that change, he starts pounding into you harder. You hear lewd noises and realize that most of them, are in fact, coming from you. Which is a little jarring of a realization but in your state, you can’t really say it surprised you. It was more of a ‘huh, that’s me then’ moment.

               The sound of skin slapping on skin fills the room along with grunts of exertion and moans of pleasure from the pair of you. You can feel yourself building up to that point once again, and you don’t realize it until you’re clamping down on his cock with a shout of pleasure. Hawks groans at the sound, and feels your tight walls somehow clamp down on him harder and starts bucking into you, nails digging into your hips as he chases his own release.

               Had you been in any normal state of mind, you might’ve found it disturbing that Hawks seemed to be murmuring a bunch of Latin as he pounded into you. You might’ve noticed the hand he placed on your heart left a searing imprint that turned dark red. You might’ve noticed his pupils contract into slits and his eyes turn a deep red for a few seconds.

               But you didn’t.

               You felt like you were floating, and figured if this could be compared to anything, it would be a more painful version of a wet, fever dream.

               Suddenly, Hawks comes inside you and you feel the warm liquid fill you up as he thrusts a couple more times, working himself through it. He stays inside, but that’s not what takes your focus. The feeling that you were vibrating without moving was back with a vengeance, but you also felt this numbness that started from your core that moved outwards until your entire body was feeling that way. As Hawks pulled out, you felt so empty, you felt like you didn’t know what to do. So, you let your eyes drift shut while you heard some talk about ‘a transfer’ and ‘both it her.’

               Suddenly, your wrist bindings were also stripped off and you look up in surprise to see Hawks with that same feather setting you free, while Dabi moved to the bedroom.

               “You still going to be good for us, little lady? We’re almost done for tonight.” He coos at you, lightly stroking your chin with his finger.  You give him a small nod, and with that, he picks you up as if you were a stuffed toy and you lean into his shoulder as he brings you to the bedroom.

               “Right, at least you’re prepared already so we can get into this quickly.” Hawks says brusquely, bringing himself to the bed and setting you down before he sits as well.

               “You were enjoying yourself a minute ago, what’s with the sudden rush?” Dabi’s eyebrow is quirked as he puts his hand in your hair and starts scratching your head. You shamelessly sigh in appreciation.

               “My times running out, gotta get this transfer done soon or else we’re going to have to start over another day.” Hawks grouches. “Damn I don’t miss all the rules, but having unlimited mortal form time? That’s something I miss about upstairs.”

               Turning his attention to you Dabi says, “Here, you enjoyed that guy, so you’ll love sitting on my cock.”

               Right now, nothing sounded better, so using the last of your strength, you crawled up to his lap and he guided you right above his dick. He brought you down slowly, ever so slowly, and you felt every inch of his dick inside you, especially those piercings that gave you an amazing sensation.

               “There’s a good girl, much better than before,” he gets out.

               “Now you’re going to need to relax, alright Y/N? It’s going to feel really tight at first but you’ll feel great afterwards.” Hawks is mumbling this into your neck, playing with your hair a little bit while he does.

               “I can do that,” you say, unaware of what he was going to do, but ready to please him.

               “Good, Dabi you might have to distract her a little bit, she’s pretty tight for one person, let alone two.” Dabi smirks but leans back, starting to play with your nipples a bit. You never thought you’d like the sensation of someone swirling around them, tugging them at some points, but here you were, enjoying every second of it.

               You get so into it, that at first you don’t notice Hawks lining up with your entrance and starting to work his way back into you. Dabi actually does first, shuddering at the contact of Hawks’ dick against his own and gasping a bit.

               “Oh Dabi, you were so cocky a minute ago, what’s wrong now?” You hear the teasing from behind as you desperately grip onto Dabi’s shoulders, trying to stay relaxed so it doesn’t hurt as much.

               “Fuck off, chicken.” Is his only response which Hawks cackles at as he starts to push further in. You gasp at the painful stretch, tears welling out of your eyes, as Hawks reaches around you to play with your clit to distract you.

               “Doing so good, sweetheart, just a little bit more, can you do that for me?” he nips at your ear.

               “Yes,” you gasp, the pleasure from his rough finger movements distracting you a bit from all the pain as your breathing gets shallow. “Slow down, please?”

               “That’ll just make it worse,” he says. “I’m just going to get it over quickly, alright?” you don’t even have time to agree before he shoves the rest of his way in, screaming out as it happens. You feel so fucking stuffed, and they haven’t even started moving or anything.

               Dabi’s losing some of that composure he’d had before, cussing as he tries to steady his breathing, but you feel his cock twitching inside you. You’re losing the strength you have in your arms as you lean forwards onto Dabi’s chest, and you moan as the shift in movement gives you friction on your clit and in your pussy.

               Without really knowing what you’re doing, you press kisses onto the side of his neck as you lie there, trying to get used to being this stretched out. It wasn’t going to happen tonight that’s for sure, because you’d barely had anything up there until today.

               You feel a grip tighten on your hips as one of them, at this point you have no idea who, starts moving in and out. The other goes the opposite rhythm so that you always feel so completely full you feel like you’re going to burst. The thought comes unbidden into your mind that these two sadists might actually enjoy that. It makes you shiver in fear.

               You can’t really remember what happened, but you have specific feelings and recollections of the two fucking into you,

               …Dabi hitting your G-Spot over and over again as you see white and cum hard on his cock…

               …Hawks leaning over you to grab Dabi into a rather passionate kiss as he got you to play with the raven-haired man’s pierced nipples…

               …Your ass getting spanked so you clench down on them and Dabi comes, but stays inside until he gets hard again…

               …getting toyed with in every possible way, bites and bruises marking your skin so much that you feel light headed from blood-loss…

               …you remember clawing at Dabi’s back which has him screaming in pleasure…

               …Dabi’s eyes glowing blue, as if he’d had flames trapped inside them and they were ready to come out…

               …pleased laughter and an uptick in pace…

               …then nothing…

                 Dabi lays back, breathing heavily as your form is slumped on his chest. He wasn’t surprised you’d completely passed out a little way into your second round. If anything, he was surprised you’d managed to last that long. He was wiped after one, but that was mainly because he was trying to keep up with Hawks, who had the fucking endurance of something otherworldly.

               Which made sense given he was a magical being.

               Still it peeved Dabi to no end as Hawks slid out of you looking completely untouched as he did so. The only thing that was out of place was his hair, messed from Dabi grabbing it, which he hadn’t remembered starting but it was sometime when he was making out with Hawks… which he hadn’t expected… but he wasn’t complaining.

               Although no matter how drained Dabi felt physically, magically? He felt so fucking ready to take on anything that could happen in the future. He could feel it pulsing around his body, in his fingertips and temples, and it felt amazing. He understood why so many people went with summoning darker entities for power transfers now, much easier and much more potent.

               “So, I have to be here in person to do my whole mind-manipulation thing, so you should think about how to keep her safe for now. She’s tied to you because of the transfer so like, if she were to die for example…. You’d definitely die too.” Hawks says with a cheery smile.

               “You didn’t think to mention that before?” he gets a shrug in response.

               “You didn’t ask. Oh and, for every time you need a power boost, just take care of her and let her enjoy the sex, it’ll ah – flow easier if you catch my drift.”

               “Thanks oh angel of a good dickening… what would I ever do without you?”

               “No seriously, the more your conduit enjoys the sex, the more you get out of it.” he looks unamused.

               “Oh. Ah, well that’s good to know.” Dabi has to start planning out his next moves then, keeping you healthy and happy was going to be a tough job.

               “I did make the suggestion to her that I was her guardian angel and you were helping her out, try to play up that angle, it’ll call up some of the residual magic in her mind and make her… more pliant.” Hawks starts putting on his clothes once again.

               “Uh, thanks. Is she just a constant source of your power then?” That’s the only part Dabi was still confused about.

               “No, I’ll be back when I feel the energy start to dwindle. I need you to do all the terrible things I know you have planned. Your soul will be fucking delicious then. Any who, see you later Dabi! It was an absolute pleasure doing business with you.”

               He vanishes like he came, suddenly disappearing with a gust of air hitting Dabi in the face. Dabi looks down on you, still on his cock as he desperately tries to think about what he was going to do to keep you in here and how he’d keep you safe trying to hunt down another coven.

[hemera989]

Blue Exorcist Headcanons: Okumura Yukio

I started this on twitter but I wanted to share them here! Headcanons about Yukio~! also asking to please keep yukio hate away please and thank you also tw for talks about mental health and suicidal thoughts! Standard Yukio Things.

I would also like to preface that this account is my first dip into the aoex fandom on tumblr, and I apologize for any similarities to other user’s headcanons!

Silly Headcanon List and GO

He has no idea what medical specialty he wants to go into, or even a vague idea of a field

Actually, his dream of being a doctor isn’t exactly as strong as other people think it is. He believed in it when he was younger, and truly did want to go into medicine, but as he grew up, it became more of an instinctual answer whenever anyone asked about his future. He lost faith in his dreams when he went through the trials of becoming an exorcist, and especially in recent manga chapters, he never expected he would actually live long enough to have a future.

Yukio still passively plans for medical school. He’s very aware of how much debt he’ll likely go into, and has been saving money in an account ever since he started getting paid for being an exorcist.

Because of that, and how poor the monastery tended to be, he’s very much a penny pincher. He spends money where he needs to, and doesn’t when he doesn’t. His scholarship to True Cross was actually a life saver.

He can be pretty spaced out most times. He has Many Things to think about, and so tends to lose track of anything that doesn’t have academic or professional importance.

This includes eating. This boy will go days without eating, or maybe surviving off of protein bars and energy drinks if he has to. He doesn’t avoid activities like this, but he’ll totally forget about them if someone doesn’t remind him.

This also means that his glasses get super dirty. He gets used to the dirt on his glasses and never thinks to clean them, really, and if they get really bad, he’ll just swap them out with another pair.

Yukio has somewhat of a Terrifyingly Blank Resting Face. When he’s not thinking about it, he just has no expression on his face, and it’s unsettling to people around him. He trained himself to smile passively and unconsciously, because he tended to freak his classmates out somewhat.

His growth spurt came rather suddenly, and hit him hard. He grew taller and wider faster than he could really keep up with. So, in battle, and in training, and fighting, he’s in control of his body and rather graceful. But in every day life, he can be clumsy as hell. He usually underestimates how long his arms and legs are.

Speaking of growth spurts, he has a lot of sections of stretch marks on his body, because his growth just came so quickly.

Because of his resistance to flames, he also has somewhat of a heat resistance, and he can be rather oblivious to the temperature of a room. It takes him longer to actually feel the heat, which is why he can go so long in his heavy exorcist coat even in the middle of summer.

While Rin’s temperature tends to run warm, Yukio is actually a few degrees colder than the average person.

Yukio gives incredible hugs because he pours all of his sadness into them because he’s just that perfect mix of tall, not too muscled, and comfortable. He doesn’t give hugs very often, but he has a habit of almost... enveloping the other person? Very comfy hugs don’t ask how i know i just know

This boy has the most severe Gifted Kid Syndrome (but honestly that’s not even a headcanon, that’s just canon). 

BONUS future headcanons!

He finds out rather quickly after this arc that he... actually has no idea what he wants to do in the future. He’s torn between going back to his doctor dream, because it’s what everyone expects of him and because it’s what he knows, versus leaving it behind for something more new.

He spends a couple of months in intensive therapy, once he finally has the time after high school (or after the Order finally takes him off duty for his absolutely terrible mental health). He’s initially an awful and combative patient, but after a few weeks (and plenty of visits from Rin and the other exwires plus Shura) he becomes more open to treatment, and finds himself making genuine progress.

He gets his problems solved and the help he needs and grows up happy and healthier thats it the end

Thank you for reading! And please feel free to add on, I’m starving for more content of him.

[where-theres-smoak-2]

Why I think Barchie Needs To Happen.

Well I’m bored so I figured I would pass the time by rambling on about Barchie. So I figured I would explain why I not only think Barchie will happen in season 5 but why it needs to happen. Obviously these are just my own thoughts, feelings and opinions on it, totally fine if anyone disagrees. 

One of the biggest reasons why I think Barchie needs to happen is one I’ve made no secret of in my previous posts. I’m bored with the current couples. That’s not to say that Jughead and Betty and Veronica and Archie are necessarily bad couples. It’s just that they’ve become too repetitive. To be honest I don’t feel like those relationships are progressing anymore. They’ve become stagnant. All Betty and Jughead do is investigate crimes and all Archie and Veronica do is get into conflicts with Hiram. It just keeps going round in circles. In the first two seasons their relationships were still progressing and growing but in my opinion the relationships haven’t really developed any further in season 3 and 4. Shaking up the couples would change that. 

Another problem that I think occurred from keeping the same couples for so long was with character interaction. It seemed like Riverdale had gotten into this rut where only the same set of characters would interact with each other. For example most of Betty’s scenes were with Jughead. Most of Archie’s scenes were with Veronica, pretty much all of Toni’s scenes were with Cheryl. It became very rare to see these characters interacting with anyboby else. Which again, this becomes boring and monotonous. But if you look at season 4 with the plot of Jughead’s fake death and the Barchie plotline we immediately started to see other characters interact with each other. We saw Veronica with Cheryl, Jughead with Charles, Ethel and the Stonies. We also saw Betty interacting with Donna. Toni, Reggie, Kevin and Fangs all had a storyline together, admittedly a terrible one but it was still a group of different characters interacting, the thing I loved about the last episode was it was a large group of characters together and that was fun to see. By breaking up the core four you open it up for other interactions and the possibilties are really interesting. It was one of the best parts of the blackhood storyline. We got to see Betty and Archie investigating a mystery instead. We got to see Jughead more involved in the Serpents and hanging out with Toni. The same again when Archie left. We started to see Veronica have storylines with other people like Reggie and the Pretty Poisons. Even getting mixed up with Gladys Jones. It was something different and that made it exciting and interesting. Season 5 is going to be introducing some new characters and this is one of the things I’m most excited for because we’ll be seeing something new and new interactions between characters. There are so many possibilties for new conflicts, new friendships and new love interests. Obviously I don’t think B*ghead and V*rchie are the sole reason why there was so little interaction between all of the characters but I do think it was a huge contributing factor, I feel like the writers just got too comfortable if that makes sense. 

Reason number 3 why Barchie needs to happen is because I feel like they need to be properly explored. Because of the way they were set up in the pilot and then the following seeds that were planted over the following seasons if they don’t get properly explored then they will always be a what if, a loose end if you will. I know some people feel like Barchie came out of nowhere but I personally think it was pretty obvious that they were laying down the paving stones for Barchie in pretty much all the seasons barring season 3. I mean the pilot episode established their backstory of childhood crushes, and made it clear that Betty was in love with Archie. The way the rejection happened in my opinion very much left the door ajar for them. In my opinion it wasn’t a straight forward rejection on Archie’s part. I just think he was confused and conflicted and wasn’t ready to start a relationship with Betty at that time. But later in the season it was obvious Archie had some jealous feelings towards B*ghead, Veronica even called him out on it. Then there was the whole ‘A little part of me always thought.’ Jughead’s voiceover about the boy next door looking at the girl next door as if for the first time. The kiss that they didn’t talk about, the fact that they didn’t talk about it very much again left that door ajar for them. They have never ever completely closed the door on Barchie. Whilst all of these were small moments they were all little stepping stones that were being laid down leading up to the events of season 4 where you got this perfect storm of situations, the stress of Jughead’s fake death, the fake dating, the fact that with graduation coming up it felt like everything was changing. All of this contributed to all of Barchie’s oppressed feelings coming back up again. But this time Betty is the one that’s not ready to commit to a serious relationship with Archie. But once again the door hasn’t been completely closed. Again I know some shippers feel like the cheating storyline in season 4 means Barchie has been explored and thats it now. But in my opinion with the unfinished song and the unburned diary Barchie’s story still remains unfinished. In order for them to really be done with the Barchie storyline they need to fully explore them. That means having them in a relationship, going on dates, sleeping together, having fights, making up, being domestic with each other and all that jazz. Otherwise they will still be that what if. I think post timejump season 5 is the perfect time to explore them. Enough time would have passed for the hurt from their breakups and the betrayal from the cheating to have healed somewhat. Both Jughead and Veronica are going to be in other seemingly serious relationships. Veronica will be married and Jughead has a live in girlfriend. With them in other relationships it would make sense for Archie and Betty to feel more comfortable starting a relationship then right after they all break up. Also they are older and more mature so they will be able to work through those emotions better. 

Why I think they should be endgame. 

Ok so I’ve put this in a separate section because its slightly different from them being explored. I 100% think they will be explored but whether they will be endgame is another question. I know there’s alot of talk about Barchie having a relatively short lived relationship and then the original couples coming back together. Most are comparing it to Spaleb from PLL but here’s the thing the two situations are completely different for one very good reason. Spaleb were not explored at all before that timejump so they really did come out of nowhere. However as I’ll talk about more later Barchie has already had romantic moments a set up before now, basically Spaleb had no foundation Barchie does. I personally think its too early to tell what will happen. There is still a possibilty that Barchie will end up together in the end. 

The first reason why I think they should be endgame is because I am a Barchie shipper who is obsessed with all things Barchie so naturally I want my ship to be endgame and I think I deserve to have my ship become endgame for a change otherwise I’m going to think I’m bad at this whole shipping thing. Basically I’m biased but I am aware of this and have no shame in it, like that’s sort of part of shipping everyone has their favourites and they want their favourites to be endgame. 

All jokes aside though one of the most common arguments I’ve seen against Barchie becoming endgame is that they are the childhood to lovers troupe and that troupe is overused so it would be too predictable. However this is actually the reason why I think they should be endgame because whilst I agree that the troupe is popular in tv shows from what I’ve seen it’s actually kind of rare for those couples to actually become endgame. I mean maybe I’m watching the wrong tv shows but some of the couples off the top of my head, Joey and Dawson from Dawson’s Peak not endgame, Willow and Xander from Buffy not endgame, Vanessa and Dan from Gossip Girl not endgame, might be wrong about this one but I think Hanna and her boyfriend Sean were childhood friends but not endgame, the only couple I can think of off the top of my head who were endgame were Navid and Adriana from 90210. Like I said it could just be the shows I’m watching but it seems to me that if Barchie do end up together it would actually be more of a twist than if they didn’t. It would be nice to see that troupe actually work out for the couple for a change. 

Another argument I see alot is that it wouldn’t be realistic for them to be endgame. Some say it wouldn’t be realistic for them to date their best friend’s ex, some say it wouldn’t be realistic for them to last when they were childhood sweethearts. The thing is realism in tv is a bit of a tricky thing because is some instances I do think its ok to complain about the lack of realism but other times its not. What I mean is that you have to look at realism within the boundaries of the show. And it can be different for each show. For example if a monster jumps out at a character in Supernatural that’s realistic for that show, you know its what the show is about. However if you were watching something like NCIS and a monster jumped out at a character that wouldn’t be realistic at all. An example of this in Riverdale is when thugs break into the Maple club and then Veronica apologises to Penelope. To me this was completely unrealistic for Veronica’s character to be apologising for putting Penelope, the woman who had recently tried to kill Veronica and her friends, in danger. But something like dating your friend’s ex or high school sweethearts getting married and becoming endgame happens all the time in this type of show, its not only realistic in the show but expected. Also if you go the realistic route then none of the couples should end up together. In reality only 2% of marriages are between couples who met and dated in high school and alot of them don’t last. For me within the boundaries of the show I actually think Barchie would be very realisitc. Like I said it is way too early to really know at this moment. But I could see Archie and Betty becoming sources of comfort for each other in the dark world that is Riverdale. They are each other’s constant the person they know will always be there, whether that’s as a friend or a lover. No matter how mad they get at each other they’ll still be there. I said in one of my reviews that I think part of the reason why Betty rejects Archie is because she knows that he’ll still be there even if she tells him she doesn’t want to be with him romantically. She was very worried about losing Jughead but she knew that she wouldn’t lose Archie, because Archie is always there and has been since she was a little girl. However I do think Betty will get a scare while he is in the army and that will be what pushes them towards having a relationship. Bascially I can see them being each other’s rock in the crazy town of Riverdale. In my opinion they have a more mature relationship with mature feelings towards each other and at the moment whilst in high school I don’t think they are ready for those feelings but after the time jump and as adults I think they will work really well together. I think they needed the relationships with Jughead and Veronica, they grew through those relationships, they learnt through those relationships but I think as they get older Archie and Betty will be more suited to each other. I know Betty has had some, hmm how to put it? Spicy scenes with Jughead but to me I feel like Archie would be more into that kind of thing than Jughead. I feel like while Jughead doesn’t mind it he more goes along with it because its what Betty is into whereas I feel like Archie would be more of a match to her if you get my drift, for some reason I’m picturing fireman roleplaying. Also I am still conflicted about the whole erasing asexual Jughead. I did read something a while back, think it was like 2017, where Roberto touched on the subject saying that “I think all of the kids are discovering themselves, and a big part of that is discovering their sexuality, their sexual selves. Rather than have everything fully formed — for instance, we’re not going to start with Archie’s band or Jughead’s asexuality or any of the things that have become canon — those are all stops on the way to the journey until the show catches up to 75 years of Archie history.” Also around the same time Cole said “The entirety of season 1 sets the pace for a character’s narrative arc. Because of the fluidity of sexuality and how oftentimes a person discovers who they are after a series of events – like those told in our origin stories – this is an ongoing conversation.”  But bascially I am hopeful that they might still explore Jughead as asexual. As time has gone on that hope has dwindled a bit but its still there. Again I think the time jump is the perfect time to start exploring this. Obviously this doesn’t mean that Jughead can’t fall in love or wasn’t in love with Betty of course he was but I would like to see a Jughead who is asexual because I do think this is something that needs to be more explored in popular media and if they are going the route of Jughead discovers his sexuality over time then this is the perfect moment for them to introduce that. Again this is just my opinion don’t come for me with pitchforks. 

Anyway that’s it for now I have a lot more thoughts but no one wants to read a novel on my non sensical ramblings of barchie. Also I’m sorry if this post doesn’t make much sense it’s nearly 2 am where I am and I’m having trouble sleeping so... Anyway what do you guys think do you think they’ll explore Barchie in season 5? Do you think they could be endgame or do you think they will unltimately end up back with the original couples?       

[randomsevans]

PAIN OF BEING LOVE part  4

"Cant we just leave " Scott whined as he leans down to your ear 

"What no " you whispered back

"But we have been here long enough "

"We have been here for less than an hour " you snapped

"And that's more then enough for people who don’t want to be here " he whispered in your ear

"Its your brothers engagement party you have to be here "

"Not if I don’t want to "

"And whys that?"

He was silent for a second, a second to long you began to get worried

"I just don’t okay " he whined

"Why ?"

"Because I don’t like seeing you hurt " he snapped back instantly

You paused for a moment thinking

You turned to faced him

"Scott I shouldn't matter. You should be happy like me that Chris is getting the life he wants " you sigh

"But what about you ?"

"Ha ! You never know I might find someone, who I will love and will love me more then this "you said with a fake smile , not meaning or believing any word you just said

"Don’t lie " Scott sigh

"Whose lying " Lisa voice perked up as she came towards the both of you .

"Oh just y/n love life "Scott said . You snapped your head in his direction sending him dagger , as he played the sweet innocent son role . You turned back to lisa with a fake smile .

"Ohhh love life ?" Sharron came and stood next to her mom

'Great how many Evan's are coming?'

"Its about time she got one " Carly joked , causing a ripple of laughter

"Ha I think you fine she has a very active love life " Scott giggled

"Scott !" You barked

"What !" He just shrugged

"So anyone new ..." Carly began

"Or old you never know "Sharron added

"Oooo is it serious " Lisa asked

"Is what serious?" Minka butted in

"Really is there anyone else in the garden that want to join in !

There was a pause for a moment

"Oh just y/n new man " Scott said confidently

You looked at him shocked

'What is he doing?'

"So there is someone about time !" Sharron shouted

"You going tell us anything " Carly asked

"Oh girls don’t pressure her , I'm sure when shes ready she’ll tell us , want ya y/n " Lisa began but then leaned in "but just let me but the first " she giggled

All you could do was nervous giggled and nodded your head , as there began to walk again until Sharron shout from across the pool

"Y/n I want to meet him "

You went scarlet red

"Meet who ?" You heard a booming voice from the barbecue, his face scrunched up in amusement of his clearly drunk sister

"Y/n new boyfriend " she basically scream

Chris face dropped into stone like and snapped to turn into your direction. A mixture of emotions flash across his face , too many , too fast your brain didnt register any only those glossy ocean eyes that met your from across the pool .

You only snapped out your trance when Scott pulled your elbow . You swatted him across the head with the back of your hand

"Oh come on y/n dont be mad because he let out your secret " you heard a very bitter snaped form chris . You stood there facing scott , your hand in mid hit , when his tone shock you . You have never heard him speak to you like that. But instead of wanting to scream, cry , run away , anger boils within you , it was just a shame that Scott was the closest Evan's

You didnt turned around to face Chris ,so you missed the glossy eyes once again that fought back a tear .

You resumes you beating, acting as if you didnt hear Chris

"What . ARE . You . Playing. At !" You said in between the smacks across Scott's head

"Ha ! Ha ! Stop " he put his hands in defence

“why did you do that . i dont have a ..” 

“ i know , i know “ Scott squilled 

“ so why say it then?” you were slowly calming down

“ i honestly dont know .... Chris was looking this way ...”

“wait Chris was watching us?” for some unknown reason your heart began to beat fast 

“yeah “ Scott simple said 

there was a moment of silence before Scott spoke again 

“it was probably only because mom and sis was near “ he shrugged walking to the bar ,to avoid just another nail in your fragile  heart . 

“probably “ you sighed following him

but unknowing to you , not all as it seems from either brothers.

                        **************************************************

Time had passed on ever so slowly for your point of view  , but you had to stay to show how happy you are for the future Mr and Mrs Evans . Staying around the whole day was hard , watching Chris with Minka broke your heart a little more . But surprisingly  it hasn't been as hard as you thought , you have actual found your self laughing a couple of times and forgetting why you are here . This might just be the beginning of a slow healing process that will never truly be healed but at least able for you to move on with your life , or maybe its because you have the best-est friend in Scott who for his own reason which you dont fully understand doesnt want to be here to as much as you .There for making it bearable for the both of you with his bad jokes , like really there terrible  but you love him all the same    .

you were currently in the kitchen getting a glass of water , as an attempt to sober your self up , before you leave .

you let the water run into the glass , once full your bring it to your  lips ,sipping it as you turned around , not quite leaving the sink yet  , contracting on the ice cold feeling run down your throat . That was of course until , you hit what was like a brick wall , making some of he water splash onto the ground ,

“oh sorr..” you stopped once you saw   who is was and end up doing a nervous laugh , trying to ignoring the raised heartbeat and that all so familiar feeling creeping its way into your stomach 

“i didn’t see where i was going “ 

“ i can see that “ a small laugh played on Chris lips in contrast to the soft, sadden eyes .

“well im sorry “ you whisper shyly , not making eye contact as you tried to get passed him , untill he placed his hand on your upper arm .

“for what the water , or avoiding me ?” he asked , you didnt need to look at him , you could hear the sadness 

“w..what ? i dont know what your talking about im here aint i “ you finally  looked up , it was then you relied how close the two of you were .

“thats not what i mean “

“then what ?” you asked confused , generally

he took a deep sigh and stepped even closer to you 

“you've been avoiding me , my calls , texts ..” he sounded like a sad child 

“iv been busy “ you tried to say over him

“i havnt seen you in 2 weeks or so “ he continued looking down , ignoring what you just said “ you havnt spoken to me all day , barley looked my way “ his eyes meet your “ and then i hear ... “ he pause bring his parm to your cheek “ and then i hear you have someone “

You couldn't breath the moment he touched your cheek , your breath was stolen , you could feel the heat raising  to your cheeks , burning under his touch . You almost missed what he said , and if your breath wasnt already gone it would be .

“why is he bothered ? , maybe this is why Scott did this , to see how chris would react ? but why would Chris react? his getting married , and why would Scott care ?”

you backed up till your back reached the sink , all to be followed as once again Chris comes back into the personal space .

“ i...it ..” you didnt know what to say , but your curiosity was wining as you couldnt think straight so you decide to go along with what you think could be Scotts , “you need to ask him later “ you  made a mental note “ why would you care anyway “

“because “  he sighed leaning in 

“because “your  breath hitched as his lips ghost your 

“because .... “ 

“CHRIS !”

Tag list

@patzammit

@little-smurf

[turnaboutyandere]

YALL I LOVED THE COP MEETING THATS DOPE AF ✨🦊✨- Wocky Anon seal of approval

So here are some potential darling meet ups, and a little backstory (so sorry that it’s this long 😅😅)

Eldoon’s daughter back from college

-Eldoon’s college age daughter comes home for a break and runs into Wocky, still raw from the whole trial. Unlike her age-wisened father, y/n is far more naive and sweet, and her kindness is an addictive balm to Wocky still fresh emotional wounds. She’s eager to help her new friend cope with his trauma unaware that he’s beginning to latch on to her. He uses her kindness and easily manipulated personality to try to get her to stay with him rather than go back to college.

Part of Apollo’s team during the trial

-Wright Anything Agency had a single young secretary to help schedule Trucy’s shows and Nick’s job. During the trial, she tried to help Wocky see that Alita was taking advantage of him. After the trial, he starts trying to make it up her kindness and gets VERY attached; showing up to the agency, following her and Apollo/Trucy to trials and investigations, etc. She and the rest of Wright Co. think Wocky is hanging around because he wants to be friends, not aware that he’s gunning to woo the secretary

Meraktis’s Daughter trying to make peace

-Meraktis’s estranged daughter who hasn’t been home in years comes to settle his will and wants to make up what her father’s negligence has done to Wocky and the rest of the Kitaki Clan. With her help they find a surgeon to do the needed operation, and Wocky sees her as an angel swooping in to save him. She stuck around after his surgery, still feeling guilty about her father’s actions, and Wocky uses this guilt to keep her around him.

Alita’s sister to help settle her affairs

-Alita’s step sister comes to help settle her shit after her arrest and during her trial. She is extremely different from Alita from how she presents herself and how she acts, and openly admonishes her step sister’s actions and feels terrible for how Alita treated Wocky. Wocky wants to hate her but they bond over their mutual betrayal from Alita, and Wocky falls for another Talia girl because he’s desperate for healing

Works at Wonder bar with Trucy

-A singer who works at the Wonder Bar with Trucy catches Wocky’s eye when he goes to watch Trucy’s act after Apollo invited him. He starts showing up more and more to her performances and uses his connection to Apollo to introduce himself and befriend her (and hopefully seduce her)

Detective helping the Kitakis

-someone broke into the Kitaki Bakery in the middle of the night and a fresh face detective is assigned to find the intruder and why. Rather than assume the worse of the Kitaki’s, the way many do, she’s open and understanding. Post-surgery and calmed down Wocky who is trying to stick to being a good reformed baker is very taken by the very understanding detective and is more than willing to help her investigation. Even when the case is solved, she still visits often and Wocky is very pleased that a law enforcer is intrigued by an ex-mobster (corruption link anyone?)

Rivales member trying to reform

-the Kitaki’s aren’t the only mobsters trying to reform their lives. A member of the gang the shot Wocky, the Rivales, wants to quit the crime life and go straight. However, the only place she feels like would be safe for her to go is the Kitaki’s, as she’s trying to hide from her old gang. Wocky is kinda a bully to her at first since her gang played a part in him getting shot and sort of started his whole bullshit with Alita; but the new girl is wide eyed and desperate for a chance at redemption and Wocky is more than willing to play into her guilty conscious to not only keep her loyal to his family but to also keep her on the straight and narrow. Anything for a second chance, right?

And for fun! I headcannon that “Wocky” is actually a nickname. His full name is Takita Kitaki (his name in the original Japanese translation), but he goes by Wocky to distinguish himself from the rest of his family and because no teachers in America could say his name right the first try and it annoyed him to hell and back.

XOXO- Wocky anon

😭 I GOT THE WOCKY ANON SEAL OF APPROVAL THAT’S ALL I’VE EVER WANTED IN LIFE-

Ahem, anyway- I think all of these are pretty solid! I think my favorites have got to be Eldoon’s daughter s/o and Wonder Bar singer s/o.

I’ve never been a fan of the “college sweetheart and bad boy” trope before but after reading this... Wocky Anon, you may have just changed my mind! Making the story yandere-themed and adding Wocky to the mix is a recipe for perfection! It honestly sounds like it’d be a really fun read!

As for the Wonder Bar singer s/o one- HOLY HELL YOU HIT THE NAIL ON THE HEAD WITH THIS ONE. I absolutely adore this trope. I love those stories where the mobster falls for the down-on-their-luck singer at some bar, especially if it’s yandere-themed! I don’t care how overdone it is at this point, it will always remain a favorite of mine.

I also really like the Detective s/o one because I’m a slut for really into those criminal x law enforcement stories. I know Wocky is supposed to be reformed in this, but like... Detective x Yakuza leader (oyabun, I think it was called) could be the set-up for a great yandere fic (which I could never write because I don’t have the skill for it but uh, Wocky Anon 👀)

Overall, I’d say all of these ideas are great! You’ve a real knack for writing stories, Wocky Anon.

(also, I am now accepting that headcanon as canon. It’s too late, there’s nothing you can do about it. It’s canon now.)

______

- Mod Dollie

[imagineofallkindsxxx]

Eternal Flame- Kol Mikaelson 5/?

You Should Be Like Me, Be Single!

Summary: 'You never know whats in a persons heart until you truly know them' - Belle French, Once Upon a Time

Singing. Thats all what Alexandra Gilbert has cared about since she was young and all she would care about until she met him.

With Alexandra fighting vampires, werewolves and all inbetween she may do a thing she vowed never to do, fall in love.

And to think it all started with a walk in the woods...

Waking up from the previous night was like I just had a bad dream but the bruises on my arm remind me that what happened was very very real. I looked at the digital clock on my night stand and saw it read 7:31. Shit. I ran into the bathroom to brush my teeth and have the quickest shower known to man before changing into burgundy dress with short sleeves and ends mid-thigh. Put on some winged eyeliner, highlighter and a nice shade of dark red lipstick. I ran down stairs seeing its 8:05, I'm able to get a coffee quick before heading off to the first day of school. When walking into the kitchen I saw my little brother on a stool. I poured myself some coffee into a travel mug before turning towards him.

"Hey. How are you?" I asked curious to how my baby brother is holding up.

"Alright considering. But I should be asking you that, how are you after last night?" I looked at him thinking of an answer that wouldn't seem selfish and rude but also honest. I hate bitching about Elena towards my brother. I don't want him to feel like he has to pick between the two of us. Before I could answer him, I heard a loud honk outside making me realise that Sam was here to five me a ride to school.

"That's my ride. do you want a lift to school?" I asked like every day and everyday he'd decline

"Nah I'm fine, Elena is taking me." I smiled and ruffle his hair before bidding him good bye seeing out my peripheral vision him trying to fix his hair making me smile a little. I grabbed my bag and walked outside getting into Sam’s car, he picks me up as on his way to school he passes my house, it’s been that way since sophmore year even before me and Elena became estranged.

"Hey, what's up?" Sam asks.

"Hi, nothing just a bit tired that's all. We still on for tonight?" I replied leaving out the reason I didn’t sleep being because of the worrisome thoughts about a certain Lockwood.

"To my knowledge. Hope so anyway, first performance in a month this Saturday. We need to prepare." He said determined to do well this weekend. Sam was always the most determined out of the four of us which I admired greatly. I hummed in agreement to his previous statement. We listened to music trying to find any song that would fit our genre on the radio before pulling up into the school parking lot filled with miserable teens not wanting to go back to school. We got out grabbing my bag and helping Sam with his bass I told him I'd meet him inside at our spot which I already know James will be lurking, he’s always early to get in. I saw my sister and her friends and walked up to them hearing Caroline say.

"Here we are. Senior year." Which made me sigh making my presence known.

"Anyone else think it should feel slightly more empowering?" Bonnie said voicing my thoughts of how deflating and normal this feels.

"Absolutely Bon. Understand where you're coming from." I replied agreeing with the witch.

"Okay. So, prank night was a bust. But we are accepting it, and we are moving on" she addressed us all not making me feel any better but for sake of pretence I put a smile on my face. This was before the pity party of my friends started with Bonnie starting by saying.

"You're right. I mean, why should I let the fact that my boyfriend is seeing the ghost of his dead girlfriends hinder this experience?" Wait what? Jeremy is speaking to his dead girlfriends? Plural? Jesus this is fucked up

"Today's our anniversary. Technically, Stefan and I met on the first day of school last year."

"Yes! And why should I let the fact that my boyfriend was turned into a hybrid put a damper on an otherwise fabulous day?" Caroline added making me think fair enough. Then Elena spoke.

"Okay you win" Caroline declared, this is when I stepped in and started walking backwards away from my sister and friends.

"Won what? The biggest pity party? You should be like me ladies, be single! Much easier than dealing and worrying about little boys!" I said with a huge smile on my face. I mean what's the big deal? "I’ll see you later." Walking away from the group of girls. I walked to our spot where I now realised Mark had joined also. this led to the four of us discussing what class we have next.

"I've got gym. Fantastic" Sam says sarcastically "Just what I need to start the first day of school"

"Better than math, feel like poking my eyes out just with the thought of quadratic equations" Mark states groaning at the thought of the numerical based class.

"I've got history. Decent compared to you two." I said looking at my time table.

"Same, thank god. I'm terrible at history. I literally only passed because I copied most of the work off of you." James informed me of his cheating.

"Gee thanks Jamie. feel so great about one of my best friends cheating." he just ignored me turning towards the rest of the group, "I'm going to put my stuff in my locker. Meet you here before heading to history?" I asked James.

"Yeah, sure." He dismissed me too engrossed in the conversation about a football game next week? Honestly, I don't particularly care about the game itself but the players do make up how boring the sport is.

I stalked off to my locker putting in my combination before seeing Elena and Caroline a few lockers up from me.

"Hello ladies." I said letting them know that I am there where Caroline shhh'd me pointing towards my sister who was on the phone, I gave her a questioning look.

"Damon" she whispered and I nodded in realization.

*******************************************************

"Rebekah? She's living with you now? Why?" asking many somewhat reasonable questions about the original, she’s quiet for a few seconds which I’m sure is waiting on Damon finishing.

"What about Stefan? What is he up to?" Asking about her beau worrying about him and his most likely death count. She waits while Damon answers.

"Come on Damon. I can handle it. What?" Persisting that Damon tells her what her boyfriend is doing before taking her phone away from her ear revealing he hung up on her. Yikes, must be bad.

Caroline then when the conversation finished put up a flyer next to me with it saying 'Spirit Squad Back to school Bonfire'.

"Is that tonight?" I questioned my friend forgetting all about the tradition, hopefully this one doesn’t turn out the same way the prank night did.

"I forgot about the bonfire" Elena said having more important matters to think about. Caroline taking our forgetfulness as not wanting to go by her rushing to say.

"You have to go. it's our first spirit quad event. And it sets the bar for the whole year." But me and Elena both ease her nerves by confirming that we will go and for her to relax. "Thank you. It's just that..." but before she could finish Tyler comes in suddenly and kisses Caroline.

"Happy first day!" he exclaims to the three of us which I give a small smile at until I see the red mark on his shirt which Elena clocks as well.

"Is that blood?" The brunette asks.

"Oh my god!" Caroline exclaims before pushing him into the boy’s bathroom with me and my twin following the couple.

"What's going on?!" he exclaims seeming genuinely confused about how having your breakfast on your shirt is a bad look.

"Vampire 101... don't wear your breakfast to school!" I'm checking if anyone was in the cubicles and would hear the supernatural based conversation going on between the couple.

"Chill out. it’s just a blood bag." Tyler said attempting to defend himself.

"From where?" Caroline questioned still extremely angry looking, before I could see this car crash of a conversation get even worse, I decided to escape

"Yeah. I’m just going to go now. Bye" being awkward but I had to get out of there. "Thank Christ I'm single" I muttered when I left the restroom.

I walked towards the spot in the corner only seeing James making me think the rest have went to class.

"Did you just come out of the boy’s restroom?" he asked confused about my whereabouts.

"Don't ask." I said and surprisingly he didn’t make fun making me think that I look quite stressed about the fact my friend turned hybrid is now going around with blood on his shirt.

It’s not even first period.

"Let’s just get to class."

When walking to class we made idle chat James trying to keep my spirits up. "Thanks James. I might let you cheat off my first paper just for this."

"For what?" he asked looking confused

"Being a good friend" yet he still looked confused when we walked into the class together, I saw my sister and Alaric talking quite closely making me furrow my eyebrows before smiling at the teacher and walking to the middle of the class where neither of us would be noticed. the class bell rang as I got my notebook out and wrote 'AP American History' on the front copying from the blackboard on the front. I overheard Elena saying to Alaric

"Look, him being here is not good for any of us. We have to do something." making me give her a questioning look which she dismissed by mouthing 'later' but something tells me it might have to do something with a vampire boyfriend with hero hair. Elena sits in her usual seat with Caroline coming and sitting next to left and Kyle sitting on her right well before our new resident psycho comes in to my shock going right to Kyle before saying menacingly.

"You're in my seat" making Kyle move to another seat. Poor Kyle.

Before anything else could be said Alaric started to teach the class

"Welcome back seniors. Let’s turn our brains back on, starting with this country's original founders... the Native Americans." Great can already feel how fascinating this lesson is, James already looking like he will fall asleep at any moment before class has even begun.

"What about the Vikings?" a girl asks taking a seat next to me

"She's hot" I heard a whisper come from my left making me give him a glare. before going back to looking at the blonde sitting next to me. Ric just replied by saying "There's no evidence the Viking explorers actually settled in the United States. Who are you?"

"My names Rebekah and history is my favourite subject"

Hope you enjoyed reading.

A/N: I fucked up with chapters so this is chapter 3 the beginning of 'smells like teen spirit.'

his was is the beginning of the episode and next will introduce Alex best girl friend Ash, dynamics between her and a certain character and more of the band.

Any British slang, spelling or grammar problems let me know.

Thanks for reading Lovelies xxx

Please comment any positive or negative feedback

[kimnjss]

for part 22 !! this is long im srry ahfduhdfu

“Now laying in his lap felt like a crime. As if you were stood in self-checkout, constantly glancing over your shoulder as you scanned an expensive pair of shoes as one of those 79 cent candy bars.”

said it a couple of times, i’ll say it again. the way you write is SOOOO SOOOO good. we can feel so much and see so much which are prolly like ,,,, the most important things in writing ?? also, poor y/n. POOR POOR Y/N . she cares so so so much for miju like bruh their friendship rlly b toxic like this huh :--(

“But you can’t shake the look on Miju’s face you conjured, watching the two of you with that pouty frown of hers, arms crossed over her chest.”

the fact that this whole girl bestie crush issue is sooooo shallow but bec miju has so much issues (she needs help), y/n finds the need to constantly feel guilty ??????????? i so so so feel bad. not @ me being a miju apologist before yIKES cant believe she made our girl try to drop out of ballet ????? fucking dumbass bitch im gonna slap her so strong

“As if he’d let it go. As if he’d pick up on the slightest abnormality in your mood and just let it slip. Let you drive yourself mad with your racing thoughts and not let him in, not let him take on some of the weight. As if.”

so this is where i started crying !!! i think it’s like the nature of people to just ,,,,, idk ask when they feel something’s wrong but they dont really care enough to actually CHECK up on you ??? if that makes sense ??? i’ve had my fair share of people doing this. they’d ask but then get sidetracked and forget you were someone to worry for. this is probably why this y/n and this jimin might be my favorite. they feel so real, the emotions are so raw. i’m rlly glad our girl has jimin by her side now. he’s exactly what she needs. not just as a lover but ,,,,, as a person. yknow ??? like someone to just ground her whenever she’s so high up her mind. someone to be with her as in WITH her. i love love love that.

“No idea what’s wrong with you, but safely relieved that it’s not him. That he could help you work through whatever it is.”

i hope u know my standards for ppl is so so so high bc of ur au-s i SWEAR to god where r the fellas like this huh ???? hUUUUH ?????

“’I don’t know… I just… keep thinking about Miju.’ Jimin lets out a scoff, rolling his eyes in a really exaggerated way.”

jimin, u, me, same

“You’re really thinking about a girl while I got my hand on your ass? Is there something I should know?”

I LOVE HIM SM PLSSSS *INSERT CRYING EMOJI IM USING LAPTOP SO* I LOVE HIM I LOVE THE HUMOR I LOVE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“His face softens at the sound of your words, becoming serious for you.”

i nominate loy! jimin for best boyfriend PERIOD if he doesnt win, RIGGED

“That’s a terrible idea.” The door slams behind the new voice, your body instantly lunging from Jimin’s lap to the vacant space behind him”

like everyone else, i tot this was miju too HAUFHDIUHFUDHUF

and then we came to the part where jimin was having his crisis bc he wants The Sex but our baby is just not having it. i actually really like the way you portrayed it. whenever he’ll talk about wanting to fuck, he’d always say but he understands and he respects. that’s reality baby. he’s a man of honor but obv he has his ~hormones~ and i cANT STRESS ENOUGH how much i love you for writing that !!!!! they jus feel real ok like . how do u even do this ???? HOW IS YOUR MIND CAPABLE OF WRITING THINGS LIKE THIS YOU TALENTED TALENTED BABY

  // ok now that i just reread it, i jus found out that they talked abt the ballet thing in this chap LMAOOOOO i thought it was when they were in the dance room ajidjfijoifjafiodj //

“Can’t wait to fast forward past all this shit. Feel like I haven’t seen you smile in a while.”

cried to this too. like ,,, cried VERY HARD. i turned my phone off AHAHHAHAHA this is pAINFUL . y/n’s going through so much and i jus feel feel feel so bad (also hits close to home) . i feel like im always gon think of this line now whenever i feel a small inconvenience afiudhuihdui . CANT WAIT TO FAST FORWARD PAST ALL THIS SHIT . WANNA SEE MYSELF SMILE AGAIN

“Surprised that he even cared about the difference, but he did.”

when i read this, yes, i cried HARDER . we all need a loy jimin in our lives huh ?? . he's just ,,,, It. like It . jimin loy best boy !!!! also @ yn. DESERVE !! youve always been the older sis, the good good friend, with jimin, u can rest bby. u can lay low, u can do whatever u want :--( u deserve it

“Did you just call me your girlfriend?”

AFHUDSHFJKAHDFJKSHAJKDHFJKAHFKJDSHFJ THERE WE HAVE IT FOLKS BYE

“No.” There’s an exaggerated roll of his eyes. “I’ve only been referring you like that in my head for the past month for fun,”

im having so much fun imagining a jimin in my life FOAHDSIFHIDSHOIFHIO ihy sm for making me realize how dry my love life is CAN I PLS LIVE IN THIS UNIVERSE N TRY TO FIT MYSELF IN BETWEEN THESE TWO AJAJAJAJA (no i wont yn deserves this but whatever mom i wANT HIM)

“I want you to be my girlfriend. So that I can be your boyfriend. And we can be boyfriend and girlfriend to each other, together.”

look at them go :--( cringey babies idk theyre so so so so so so so so nd i cant stress enough SO SO SO SO ADORABLE

“Go ahead. I’ll protect you.”

IM FUCKING SCREAMINGAHDHUFDHUSHIUHAFUIHDSFUI I LOVE HIM OKAY MUM I LOVE HIM CAN I PLS HAVE HIM WHERE DO I FIND (but also, IVE BEEN SAYING IT but like thank thank thank thank fuck they found each other. though y/n has kook, jimin is jus different ,,, i mean obv right but yes im just so so so so glad. y/n doesnt need to always be strong and dependent now. she can just be her and jimin loves that. SIGN ME UP UHUH UHUH

and then we have this whole talk with the moon and y/n quoting him back. i think loy yn and jimin best couple ????? I WILL FRAME THE WHOLE MOON TALK OKAY BYE ,,,,,,,, but fr thats so wholesome and i feel so honored i get to read this FOR FREE. it’s just soooo *insert that aww-ing emoji the one w big eyes* . i love them so much im willing to risk it ALL. theyre so so so so amazing. YOURE AMAZING. i LOVE IT.

[stimmypaw]

stimmypaw reads the apprentice’s quest, a blog post

A big one, just a bunch of thoughts as I’m reading it, of course, lots of spoilers for the first book in the Warrior Cats series A Vision of Shadows. This will be covering just the first book tho, it’s all in the Read More, let’s gooooooo!!!!

Vision Of Shadows time

Lots of new cats!!! I don't remember these guys as kits or anything wrow!!! I like their names but itll take a while to get used to them

Also cant believe they printed stormcloud's dead name

Omg there's a cat named beepaw

I love these cats all of them so much im going 2 cry

All new names are perfect

I FORGOT HOW GORGEOUS THE CAT VIEW IN THE RECENT BOOKS WAS, LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT

I'm glad leafpool smokes weed

I love reading from Jayfeather's point of view, his grumpiness hasn't grown on me ever but thats just me, I still enjoy it lots he's great and its fun

Firestar and Leopardstar's characterizations are On Point i love it

OOF i feel so bad when jayfeather is mean to others, poor kestrelflight, I love those two

Lovely Jayfeather moments now its time for the first chapter

I like this duo! Also I didn't think I'd ever say this but shut up squirrelflight one can have fun AND learn with their mentors

Sparkkit sounds nice she makes jingling bell noises when she walks around

Alderkit is chadphobic /j

I can see Alderkit taking deep breaths to relax its rotating in my mind its beautiful

God this first chapter feels so good and comfortable, like eating noodles and chicken nuggets. I am so so deeply in love with it, its gorgeous!

Sparkkit is so perfect too, and Graystripe remembering Firestar aaaaaa

DUSTPELT SAID WHAT? PHDHAHAHHA OH NOOOO I don't remember their relationship much, must have been fun, I love young little creature squirrelflight I MISSED HER SO BAD WOW

I started reading the second chapter and died, I think ill take a break now 2 sleep heehhee

I love them describing twoleg stuff its always so fun and alien, like watching an animal planet show about funny sea creatures.

Also I have determined sparkpaw is my favorite, might be my favorite cat ever next to hollyleaf??? I really identify with her and also she's autistic i have decided that

Alderpaw baby noooo hhhh their mentor at least is trying to show its okay, he seems very emotionally distant so far and alderheart feels very emotionally needy, actually both of them do, did I mention I love Sparkpaw??? I might be imprinting myself 2 much on her

I love how like, its clear both of them are absolutely anxious and worried about others opinions on them, which is clearly something they got from being Firestar's grandkids, deputy kids and leader kids. And bramblestar too, I recall him being quite the anxious lad ahhah. Sparkpaw will be showing confidence and being loud but the second anyone isn't approving of her or she does something "wrong" she gets small and quiet, and she ended up setting a high bar for herself by being good at hunting and fighting so I'm curious to see how that will go. Also there's nothing wrong with being guided through a crowded place to meet others Sparkpaw!!! I bet the two of them would be stuck without not knowing how to talk to others had Needlepaw not shown up. I love them, my gf is mocking me saying I'm a Sparkpaw kinnie.

Apprentices will like learn about a thing and tell everyone about it all the time and assume its always true in every situation and thats valid I love kids like that. Also in my head Needlepaw kinda looks like a porcupine. Oh boo she's fatphobic >:(

I love apprentices they are so fun and silly, just making fun of the leaders like its nothing. The way they are clearly learning and absorving everything their warriors say and do like sponges its just ***chefs kiss***

Omg shadowclan is just full of 12 year olds help

And then the old person said "it sure is hard being old!" And everyone clapped

Shout-out to pretty Riverclan apprentice #481977 I love her

Leafpool: 👁👁

Alderpaw: I knew it im cursed and awful and terrible and I will never amount to anything

I wish the cats didn't seem to be giving up on him so easily though

Ah yes the classic thunderclan move "you suck, into the medicine hole you go"

The way sparkpaw changes the things she says and how she does when it isn't the status quo around her oooooooooooooyeaaaaaaa I love 1 autistic cat

Alderpaw considering your problems lesser than other cats won't help you deal with them better bro

I love Needlepaw's excitement about Alderpaw being a medicine cat apprentice, and her sarcasm, she feels like a preppy teenager

Ahhh this is so good, I am so thirsty for family moments like this, just Alderpaw bonding with grandma, I’ll definitely want to draw this one it’s so sweet.

Oh to be young and silly.

I really am enjoying like, Alderpaw’s struggles to seeing how he fits in the clan, how he fits in himself, how he wants to be seen and what he wants to be, it’s really good. I Am Engaged(tm) With This Plot.

SPARKPAW NOOOOOOO but also Yes I want her to be shown vulnerable and weak please 

POP, god watching this stuff always awful, the cats must have thought he broke her ahahah

Also, really great that they learned from Dovewing and now like leave choices and discussions about prophecies between adults

And plus Brambles seemed to take the time to explain stuff to him, seems he wont be going alone either the 1 thing is that he will be the only one knowing what the journey is really about, why though??? I didnt read Firestar's Quest or whatever why does Skyclan need to be secret??? Seems quite silly really!

YESSSS SANDSTORM GET HIS ASS FIGHT FIGHT LOVE THIS LOVE SANDSTORM

I could feel squirrelflight nearing explosion here, this was very fun, i wish they werent hiding this though!!!

The secret thing is showing to be a plot point so I am once again Very Engaged

Also, wonderful dialogue bit, someone asked Bramblestar why an Elder is going and:

Lovely perfect perfect

I miss you dovewing

SQUIRRELFLIGHT LOVE YOU

Oh boy this is it

Traveling book moment

Graystripe: Soooo you're excited to go on the journey to the old territories and Skyclan?

Sandstorm: Yes! It's been ages and-

Graystripe: I'm sure the tribe will love the visit too

Sandstorm, groaning: Oh noooo I forgot about how the tribe is in the way of every journeyyyyy noooooo they're such a racist caricature, please tell me you have a plan

Graystripe: Yes don't worry about it the writers forgot about the tribe in my comic book so you can just use the excuses i did to actively avoid it

Sandstorm: Oh thank Starclan

Sparkpaw's desperation to prove herself oof, her anxiety with understanding the prophecy, oh boy, and Alderpaw feeling too overwhelmed by the questions and not managing to talk!!!! I am so glad they are both autistic

Hoping "Being Leader" wont mean theyre putting nonsense responsibility on the apprentice again

Ah good Sandstorm is on the lead again, as she should, she should have been leader she would have been great

I can't believe Alderpaw thinks I look stupid and diseased :( /j

Everything about this twoleg scene was scandalous I loved it, Sparkpaw just toppled over a trash bag and they are eating from it, iconic, also did those twolegs throw out a whole turkey? Damn

Its not that Sparkpaw is freakishly good at hunting she is very hungry and constantly on the watch for things to eat

BRO Ive never been in a road where the drivers are this wild, throwing bottles out of the car????? Ive seen Fruit being thrown like once or twice, what the fuck!!! I'm glad they are going to wait until the morning to continue

Okay I was not expecting Needlepaw to show up this girl is chaotic I love her

ACTUALLY YEAH WHY DIDNT THEY TELL THE OTHER CLANS ABOUT THIS SINCE THE PROPHECY IS ABOUT ALL THE CLANS???

Needlepaw is like Rono from Bambi 2 if he wasnt a mean bully and thats very epic

Very curious character though, how come her mentor isnt teaching her the warrior code properly? Is that an issue with all apprentices?? Is the clan overwhelmed by 12 year olds and they won?

Having lots of fun trying to play the game "what animal are they describing this time" the erins made here, im glad they're in a farm. Worried about Sandstorm though :c

Fuck im worried about sandstorm a lot, her wound hurt on Me

Yeah water is good youre right sandstorm

Aw man I hope she's okay let her at least survive to meet skyclan please

NOOOOOOOO SANDSTORMA A AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Sandtteooonrjrbbbmmnnnnnnnnnn

I am so sad

Alderpaw denying it, Starclan shining upon their vigil, everything crushed me i cried

Alderpaw considers Nihilism

Haven't seen a cat thank starclan for prey in a while its

Oh look they time skipped a journey! They don't tend to do that thats nice

I'm so excited to be meeting The Skyclan that everyone in the fandom knows now

So far they seem kinda mean but thats most clans at first glance really

Okay somethings up

I uh have heard of Darktail pretty sure he's a bad guy so yeah something really bad happened to Skyclan

Am worried

Darktail sounds like an evil himbo* i may be enjoying him actually

*himbos are usually nice by default so he's just evil and stupid and strong

Does needletail know these cats already?????

Ah

Shit

Oh okay fuck

I've been quietly reading the rest because I am just concerned and I want them to be okay as quickly as possible

Waterfalls are a classic nice

Oh boy time for our unlikely duo of Alderpaw and Needlepaw to get out of a Mess!

I did not expect this to end up with the two of them journeying into parenthood, but I'm happy it did

Well actually I'm very unhappy theyre so lost and there's no sign of Skyclan I am very worried for everyone involved Sparkpaw must be feeling awful!

Twigkit is a great name

Yeah this ended terribly

Overall! Frigging loved it this book was GOOD and a great start for the series I am very excited to read the rest, SO WORRIED ABOUT SKYCLAN THO AAAA the characterizations were great the characters were great the pacing was fun and I didn't get bored once!

I think o only wish I had read this sooner really so I could look up others thoughts without getting heavily spoiled about the last books, I can watch a few videos already though thats a start ahhaha. But yeah it was great and it felt very good to read, haven't swallowed up a book so quickly in a very long time!!! Very happy I finally got my hands on this 💕💖💕💖💕💖 cant wait 2 start the next one

If you read all this, hope you had fun hahaha, ill be making more of these cus theyre fun and I like talking about warrior cats thats just my thing

Til next time

[autisticstarseed]

👐 Hand washing guide when you have sensory issues 👐

tbh. we shouldve been talking abt this a long time ago for many disabled ppls sake but ive put this post off for like a million years out of pure solidified fear of ableist harassment/kneejerk ignorance and also generalized cringe idiots but now that we got so much covid-19 fear and autistic ppl actually tend to have weaker immune systems than most people lets jump the shark;;;

i have autism and i physically struggle with washing my hands as often as i want to, having wet hands, drying them, the temperature difference, bad soap smells/textures, etc. are all genuinely painful. the good news is that ive dealt with water aversion shit since birth (its a common sensory issue), so ive had time to figure out alternatives and coping skills that still help reduce risk of disease and spreading it in ways that i can personally manage. (ie. not lazy or selfish or gross. genuinely putting more effort into this every day task than most other people would even think about. just disability lads) so heres the guide i have to offer if you’re in a similar boat, with some keypoints about hand hygiene and tips addressing the most common sensory struggles ive noticed with it;;;

1. hand sanitizer

i love hand sanitizer, i can get it in almost any scent i want and it dries down very very fast. the problem is; hand washing and hand sanitizer do different things. it only kills certain types of germs. which is all fine and dandy, but because of this, using only hand sanitizer wont actually keep you from catching or spreading many illnesses. so what its good for is times you cant wash your hands (out in public, sensory overload, no spoons, etc), thats fine, but it should not replace all hand washing if at all possible. it is supposedly effective to covid-19, but so little is currently known that it should not be considered your go to for this, and the only unanimous statement straight from the CDC is that hand washing works best at preventing its spread.

temperature - if you have trouble with it being too cold, conveniently keeping it in your pocket or closely against your body in some way warms it up and makes it much more comfortable. 

scent - they come in almost any scent you can imagine, but if you have trouble with strong scents, there are ‘scentless hand sanitizers’. they usually have a faint chemical smell, so if there are any testers available, you should check to make sure it can work for you before you buy it.

texture - if gel doesnt cut it, they also make foamy hand sanitizers and liquid sprays, but theyre harder to find and might be a little more pricey.

and remember; always buy hand sanitizer that says it contains AT LEAST 60% alcohol, the higher alcohol content the better, but try to keep track of how high it is and how much you apply it so you dont dry your skin out. and right now price gouging is pretty bad, so dont be surprised if you cant find any for a while, and dont buy any small bottle that costs over a couple dollars, its a rip off.

2. hand washing 

so what does hand washing do thats better than sanitizer??? soap and water lift up the dirt and oils that are carrying the germs and actually wash them off, and not only that, it also gets rid of all the things sanitizer cant, such as dust/dirt, spores, chemicals, and the previously mentioned viruses that are harder to kill. ik to an outside perspective it might not seem that hard, but obviously when you have autism and these tasks are split down into bigger ordeals and sensory nightmares, it can feel impossible. 

soap - there are so many different kinds of soap! scentless soaps exist, and they very rarely have any lingering chemical smell! theres also soap for sensitive skin, and baby soap also works well for that issue. bar soaps can come in all different shapes and sizes, with many different ingredients and additives to choose from (independent soap makers are an amazing source for customized soap btw), and liquid soaps can be pure gel, frothy, mousse-y or even have tiny exfoliating or moisturizing beads in them if thats a sensory experience you enjoy. this is my number one rec for people struggling with hand washing bc of sensory issues;;; mix up the soap. finding one that gives you an okay or even a GOOD sensory experience can completely turn around an otherwise meltdown inducing task

temperature - this is the one thats always been hardest for me. cold water straight up hurts me, and our plumbing is Terrible, so the trick i have for slow pipes is to run the hot water on high as Soon as i get into the bathroom. leave it going and by the time you’re done there should be at least lukewarm water. if this still takes too long for you, try out the various sinks in your house, usually one is able to get hot water faster than the rest (for me its the kitchen sink) and that can become a designated station for you if need be.

texture - some ppl just hate water. if thats the case, it rly doesnt change much abt the process if you use less water, ie work the soap into a lather, and then only use as much as you need to rinse it off. you dont have to keep your hands under the whole time, the soap clings to the dirt, the water takes it off all together, as long as you scrub well and rinse till you see no suds, you’re good 

If it really comes down to it, a washcloth with water+soap, a disinfecting wipe, or even literally just a rinse with plain ol water is better than nothing, but the stream of water and act of rubbing the soap in is the most effective combo against disease. soap/disinfectant wipes and hand sanitizers are your second best option. if theres a time in your life where an issue is so disabling for you that you truly cant keep any of this up, rly the most important thing is to limit your direct physical contact with your face and commonly used objects as MUCH as possible until you can figure smth out. (you kno those old ladies that grab a wipe and open the doorknob with it between their hand and the knob? become that old lady) and if push comes to shove, if a safe and accepting therapy setting is something accessible to you, hygiene struggles are actually something many mental health professionals understand Very well and can help you cope with personally and directly, without shame.

3. hand drying

this is also. my personal hell. and what most people say is the hardest part of the sensory experience. but ya cant just walk around with wet hands right

towels - the obvious choice for most, but to me they actually dont dry enough. i always end up damp and with lint stuck to me. this kills the man. but hand towels do have some variety to them, you can find em with really long fibers or really short/flat, really fuzzy or really stiff, etc. sounds silly but its smth a lot of ppl dont think about that can change a lot. you can also try super absorbent towels (yes like a shamwow), and again baby bath towels are also an option if you want something gentle.

paper towels - yeah a little more wasteful and expensive, but imo much more absorbent. theyre also pretty thin so you can get between your fingers (MY BANE), and under your nails if you use a corner. 10/10

blow drying - ik this is the kind of shit you only see in like movie theaters and malls and they are definitely LOUD AS SHIT, but if you happen to have the money, and struggle more with Textures than Noise, ie a stream of warm air seems worth the sound, you Can actually find a small basic one of these items for your own home. 

4. public restrooms

everybody hates em!!! but you can make em more tolerable;;;

soap - bring your own! little travel soaps you can keep in your bag are a godsend for ppl with sensory issues, sensitive skin/allergies, and if you just prefer not sharing soap.

temperature - most public places i notice actually do get hot water pretty fast (like,,, too fast,,, like,,, it bur ns me) so if there are no faucets and its too hot or too cold, once again you can try different sinks and one might be more comfortable. if there are faucets i recommend grabbing a paper towel to turn it off, so you dont have to touch it again with your clean hands.

sound - WHY R AUTOMTIC FLUSH TOILETS SO FUCKEN LOUDD..... honestly if you have noise cancelling earmuffs or earplugs or w/e pop em in. if you dont have any of that i just literally plug my ears with my fingers when i stand up. if you struggle with the sound of the blow dryers, they almost always have paper towels as well, but its a great idea to carry something like that around in your bag with you just in case. if its really packed and people chattering is getting to you, sometimes the ‘family’ bathrooms are actually smaller and less full. if its bad enough and you feel comfortable asking, an employee might be able to direct you to a single stall bathroom or at least a different one than that.

and though its convenient, try not to use your sleeve to touch things like doorknobs, toilet handles, etc. instead use something disposable like a paper towel or wipe, bc the germs will simply transfer to your sleeve and still risk infecting you. 

5. schedule

the number one suggestion is to wash your hands literally as often as possible during a time like this but like. even for allistic/nt/abled/ ppl thats just not always an attainable schedule so the Best times to wash your hands are;;;

after using the bathroom - the most important time and generally the easiest to get used to. its smth you have to do multiple times a day that already has a schedule, and if you were to forget or go into sensory overload its usually immediately accessible as soon as you can. as i mentioned earlier, if you need help remembering, you can turn the water on when you first get in and leave it going.

the doctors - ANY KIND of health facility should be avoided right now unless really necessary, places where sick people would frequent is the quickest way to get sick but like. ya rly cant help it sometimes right. you cant stop dealing with your own illnesses just bc theres another one floating around. so, this is time to go apeshit on the handwashing. if your health issue involves coughing and sneezing, ask for a face mask. bring a scarf in case they dont have any, its not as great but better than nothing. otherwise, you honestly dont need it, face masks are more for these people bc they keep germs in better than out. whether you’re worried abt getting sick or infecting others, this is a time to use hand sanitizer, avoid physical contact like shaking hands [autistic cheering], and when you first arrive and right before you go to leave are the most important times to remember to wash your hands. 

preparing food - not as commonly spoken about, but also easy to work into a schedule. i personally dont care unless its food for somebody else or if im going to be putting my hands on it a lot, but if thats the case, a lot of the time thats produce you already want to wash in the sink, so you can kill two birds with one stone there. dont just get the germs off your own hands, get em off the fruits and veggies before you eat em. carpool

after grocery shopping - not very common. most ppl just slap some sanitizer/a wipe on there or dont think abt it at all, but if you just got home from walmart thats a great time to wash. you just touched a bunch of items other people touched, including the cart, money/credit cards, and all the products people will pick up and put back, so its prime germ time babey. But again, sanitizer or a wipe will help if its all you can manage after a trip out like that.

before self care - also uncommon. ppl always say ‘dont touch your face’ and ‘apply this product with clean hands’, and what they mean is that one of the fastest ways germs get into your system is through your mouth, nose, eyes and ears. if you’re simply washing your face theres not as much concern, but applying a mask, moisturizer, makeup, etc. should all be done after a gentle rinse of your hands (and face). very hard to get into the schedule of, but if you consider it a Part of your ‘self care’ or use a special fun cleanser, it can stick a little easier.

6. stim items

STIM ITEMS!! if you have stim items, its a good idea to clean them regularly, but even moreso during an outbreak like this.

rubber/plastic - if it goes in your mouth, hot water (not hot enough to melt!) and dish soap, if it doesnt, look up how to safely make a diluted bleach solution.

silicone - silicone is usually dish washer safe.

fabric - if its light, add bleach to the washing machine, if its colored, you can use white vinegar or hydrogen peroxide which are less likely to discolor any dyes. lysol detergent is also super great. small items you’re worried about losing, or items with details/loose parts, you can usually wash inside of a sealed pillow case. 

‘squishies’ - for ‘mochi’ squishies aka the rubbery ones, soap and water + some dusted baby powder or corn starch (optional) to keep it from grabbing lint for a while. for foam squishies, they can rarely be deep cleaned without the risk of growing mold or taking paint off, but a disinfecting wipe every now and then should keep it clean for a while.

slime - cant be disinfected, sorry. also a breeding ground for mold if you arent careful, so its always best to cycle through these quickly.

technology - cant really be completely sterilized, but there are many places to get sprays and cleaning wipes for the devices you use that can at least keep the areas your hands frequently touch a little cleaner.

BUT of course if your item comes with instructions on how to wash it, always follow that instead. this is just a general idea.

and as a final note;;; disabled ppl should not feel guilty or dirty for struggling with this. like. man idc abt ur cringe feels or your ignorant blame or your lack of understanding/sympathy for what goes into these tasks for us. if u dont wanna get our struggles and sensitivities when we’re working twice as hard on functioning tasks which personal ease you take for granted, thats on you. @ disabled people if you struggle with maintaining the same standard of hygiene as nts you arent gross or bad fucking person, you’re disabled and by definition that means your level of functioning will be different, and you deserve sympathy. its just that germs dont discriminate, they wanna cause problems for everybody involved (especially you!!!), so Anything you can manage is Great and if anything from this post can help make it a little easier for people in any way, i feel its absolutely necessary to talk about with respect and dignity. people with autism/adhd/sensory processing disorder/similar neurodivergencies/literally anybody else this could benefit, pls feel free to add on any tips you might have or send me questions. let disabled ppl help disabled ppl do our personal bests

[kamari333]

The post you written about yandere Underfell Sans/Red was interesting to read. Do you have any posts on Yandere Undertale Papyrus?

Until now, the only classic undertale yandere Papyrus I'd written was the one that showed up in those two chapters of Resonance that we don't talk about.

Papyrus is already a brutal guy. The only thing keeping him from being canonically yandere is his own integrity and stubborn belief in anyone being able to do better. I like to think, in a way, he thinks that as much for himself as anyone else, because he knows how easy it would be for him to do bad things, and so he tries very hard to be a good person.

If Papyrus ever decided that his desire for something- someone- was more important than being a good person, he would slide right into being yandere.

Papyrus would always have that bubbly enthusiasm and perpetual smile, right up until he doesnt. Whether or not he got genuinely angry with his obsession would entirely depend on what process mad him go yandere in the first place.

If it was trauma or desperation, I think it would be very easy for him to be upset with his obsession: he wouldn't like if they stopped appreciating him, or showing him affection, or telling him how cool he was. He'd become upset and maybe growl or cry. or both.

If not, if it was just his chosen path or his nature, I doubt very much he would ever get angry at the one he loves.

Either way, it really would'nt change the outcome in the end.

Canonically, Papyrus is a terribly brutal guy as well as incredibly talanted at emotional manipulation. Take the restraints off of that by making him yandere and theres really no escape.

It wouldn't matter how you met, or whether or not it was an instant obsession or one made over time, Papyrus would declare the moment he realized his feelings that he was absolutely smitten, and in the same breath assure you that he knew you felt the same. There would be no convincing him otherwise.

Papyrus was already practiced at long vigils. He stood outside Undyne's door all night to get into the guard, and his feelings about that would be nothing compared to how he felt about his beloved. He'd spend every free moment waiting to be let into your home, usually with a gift in hand.

He'd call you all the time. If you changed your number? He'd find your new number even if he had to call every other number in sequential order to do so. He wouldn't have to of course, because he'd just check your phone while you were sleeping to get it. Doors and walls can't really keep him out, his waiting outside is just a courtesy.

He'd take pictures all the time. All the pictures. All of them.

He'd send you gifts, big and small. Lots of spaghetti, but other things too.

Sometimes the bones he sends you are his. Sometimes they belong to the guy who asked you out at the bar last night. Semantics. Bones are always romantic.

He'd never really stop. Nobody is physically capable of restraining him, so restraining orders dont work. The only reason he hasn't scooped you up and run away with you is because thats not how it works, you have to declare your love first before the scooping occures. Papyrus wouldn't quite understand why you were dragging that particular stage of your relationship out, but he was a fan of drama so why ruin the fun?

He never sleeps, he rarely eats, he has all the time in the world plus a little extra he can borrow from his friends. Papyrus will outlast you. The only question is if you break before or after he gets bored.

A bored Papyrus finds ways to entertain himself. He especially loves when others join in his games. Making a puzzle, a maze of fire and electricity and hungry piranhas, is childs play for him. Dragging your mattress to the middle of it while youre asleep on it would be just as easy.

He'd of course be there to save you if you needed it. And telling him how much you love him and want to advance your relationship is a great way to make the puzzle seem unimportant.

Once he hears you say it, confirm his suspicions that you loved him just as much as he loved you, there would be no turning back. Dating Start.

Victory for the Great Papyrus.

[ofwrth]

alex again, this is my second bean dominic so please feel free to show him some love ! if you want to fill one of the connections shoot a dm my way or if you’re up for plotting something else i’m up for that as well !

The pain and the struggle followed me.

–– 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐒:

full name: dominic “dom” carter

nickname(s): dom, carter.

gender: cismale

age: thirty (30)

birthday: 14, july 1990

sexuality: heterosexual

nationality: african-american.

religion: none.

place of birth: charming, ca.

currently resides: charming, ca.

spoken languages: english.

native languages: english

relationship status: single.

–– 𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄:

height: 6'0", 182.88 cm

weight: 69 kg or 152 pounds

figure/build:  athletic

hair colour: black

eye colour: dark brown

tattoos:  many.

piercings:  none.

scars/distinguished marks: he’s gotten a few scars from past scuffles & from fights doing underground fighting.

preferred style of clothing: a lot of gym clothes such as basketball shorts, sweats, hoodies, tank tops, shirts, normal days not spent working out he’s in jeans and a simple t-shirt.

frequently worn jewelry/accessories: his fathers dog tags.

–– 𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐘:

father: eli carter. (deceased)

mother: henrietta carter. (deceased)

sister(s): one sister. (wc)

brother(s): none.

partner/spouse: n/a.

children: none.

other: n/a.

–– 𝐏𝐒𝐘𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐋 𝐄𝐕𝐀𝐋𝐔𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍:

personality:  valorous, focused, observant, short-tempered, abrasive, withdrawn, stoic, hard-headed.

likes: wokring out, fighting and working on cars.

dislikes: cocky people mostly.

fears/phobias: loosing his sister for good.

favorite colour: anything in darker shades.

music taste: not picky about music but can’t stand sad shit.

–– 𝐒𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐒:

current job title & description: mechanic by day & underground fighter by night.

peaceful or aggressive attitude?: peaceful for the most part but he has tendencies to be aggressive.

talents & hobbies: fighting, mechanical work on vehicles. he also make a good breakfast.

–– 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐈𝐄𝐖:

trigger warning; mentions of child abuse.

dominic grew up with his uncle and sister when his parents died in a terrible accident. a fire had burned their home down when the kids were at school, resulting in their parents death and with no other family besides their uncle, they had no choice but to live with him. it hadn’t been ideal, being taken away from a home that was full of love and comfort to a home that was rough and cold. their uncle had a terrible temper and often took it out on them. but it was better than being separated, at least thats what he had told his sister. dominic had taken most of the beatings growing up and it wasn’t until high school when his uncle had calmed down. he still held a temper but didn’t beat dom. dom wasn’t a kid anymore and the man knew it.

dom didn’t have much of a plan after high school unlike his sister. he had gotten by but he didn’t like school in general so continuing wasn’t ideal for him. he had gotten mixed up into the wrong crowd and began selling marijuana to make income. it wasn’t until one of the guys who had recently joined the group brought up a job opportunity did dominic’s life really change.

he had found himself behind bars for a long time. the job had taken a wrong turn when it became clear that his two co-conspirators planned to rip him off and take his cut for themselves, he was overcome with rage and beat the crooks to a bloody pulp. dominic ended up getting caught and was convicted of aggravated assault and battery. he was sentenced to six years in prison. that year dom had lost his freedom and his sister.

she refused to visit him, ignored his calls, and never responded to his letters. it had hurt him big time. he had been stuck inside for three years before they let him go on good behavior. he had stuck to himself, avoiding any problems as hard as it was but he had managed.

so there he was, fresh out the cell and freedom had never felt so good. moving back to charming wasn’t a problem. dom had hoped that the news of what he had done had come and gone quickly over the years but it came to no surprise when people stopped to give him judging looks.

he was in for it but it wouldn’t scare him off. he’d move back to his uncles, the man being too old to be on his own and from the looks of it he had calmed. he took a job up at charmings only mechanic shop, having learned a few things about cars in prison. he enjoyed tinkering just as much as he enjoyed working out.

he joined the renegade gym and it occupied more of his time which he accepted with open arms. however it still didn’t take the edge off. he had heard a few of the gym goers talk about an underground rink and it peaked his interest. it wasn’t easy getting in but he had done so and once he got in, he was hooked on the thrill it brought him. with the the opportunity of joining the underground scene, he was introduced to samantha martinez. Somehow he had gotten pulled into the position of being her personal bodyguard but dominic didn’t mind. it was work he was willing to do.

–– 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒:

his sister: this is going to be a sent in wc so feel free to message me if you’re interested. i don’t want to elaborate more because i want to give more room for muse.

ex-(best)friends: this is one of the guys who dom hung out with before going to prison and he could have either been  apart of the group who tried robbing the place or he could have been someone who wasn’t for it and stayed behind. either way dom would either not trust them fully or at all.

drinking buddy: someone doms warmed up to since his return. they’re not close enough but he enjoys the company.

opponent: someone dom doesn’t really get along with and can’t stand. they can have bad blood from the past or maybe it just happened. they haven’t fought in the match yet but i’m sure it’ll happen.