#im not Not gonna think abt how much that reminds me of a very similar scene in DotD…

[groundbreakingdot872]

somebody call an ambulance

[queenie-blackthorn]

FINALLY, ive finished 25% of exile, the second book in the kotlc series. here are some thoughts i had :)

tags: @aylin-hijabi, @that-multi-fandom-hijabi, @tastetherainbow290, @nerdy-girl3791 (im tagging everyone who asked to be tagged in my notes for book one, but lmk if you wanna be tagged too / dont wanna be tagged anymore)

first off, why are second books in a series always the ones that take the most time / are harder to start? ig it could be that we've already established the worldbuilding n main characters, but its still that dragging stage between *where you already know mostly everything in the universe* and *where the climax builds up in anticipation of the "final battle" or the beginning of the third act, usually*. nothing to do w the book itself, just an observation

second off, alicorns are so much more important than being just "another species to save", im sure of it. theres wayyy too much of the council getting involved n talk abt how alicorns are sooo important. to anyone whos read percy jackson it kinda reminds me of the ophiortaurus (bessie) from sea of monsters, who seemed to be a recurring animal side character who turned out to have a lot of significance to the very universe they were in. im expecting smth similar, why else would everyone go to such lengths to ensure alicorns dont go extinct? or maybe im overthinking it lmao but what gives it away is the heckses literally tryna kidnap silveny-

speaking of the heckses, who the fuck tries to steal an alicorn. stinas parents are the whiniest bitches ive ever seen, and im a fifteen year old girl. like cmon ive seen some drama queens over the years, but those two- also, fucking stina. i mentioned before that i hope to see some character development w her, so shes not just the boring one-dimensional mean girl thats prevalent in literally every piece of media thats come out since mean girls w regina george. clearly not yet, tho, but im waiting on it (if it does not happen i will be majorly disappointed)

also, delving into theories now. its kinda far-fetched, but, was brant w the black swan ? i mean, it would add up pretty decently. it would explain why his guilt for jolies death runs so deeply (since grady rlly rlly seems to believe that the black swan killed her) because he would be with the literal organization that killed her. it would also explain reeeeaaaaalllllyyyy well why he recognized sophie. the fact that he knew her was wayy too emphasized to mean nothing. idk JUST A THEORY, its not based off of anything other than it would fit nicely w everything else.

but also if grady is so adamant that it was the black swan, and (hypothetically) brant is w the black swan, then would it be improbable to assume that he killed her? which would explain the guilt even MORE. but then again, he does seem to love her, so that last part is added very tentatively. (maybe he killed her by accident... but then would the note to grady three days before her death just be a coincidence? im sure that has some deeper meaning.)

maybe it wasnt the black swan who sent those notes to grady...

to end on a funnier note: alicorn poop. sophie faceplanted into alicorn poop. it happens to all main characters, it always has to be someone walking in at the worst moment. i thought id be the vackers w keefe who show up n embarass her, but who better than the council to get humiliated in front of ? i dont hate sophie i just laugh at her pain

i think thats all for the 25% mark, im gonna keep reading today. im gonna go to my grandmas house so maybe i can get a couple hundred pages in !!!

[thirteen-cats-in-a-trenchcoat]

OH MY ACTUAL GOD

like I know I've read Russian roulette a billion times but this part-

Like Im gonna write a fic on it, with a few changes abt it

Note: what timeline? Never heard of one

-------- [yassen pov] -----

'You coming?' John stood relaxed, hands in his pockets, with a small smile on his face, 'you know, no matter how much you go around here, there's always more to see. '

'yeah, I'm coming' I replied, running over to him.

We spent the whole day walking along the streets of Venice, talking, sightseeing, and just... Relaxing.

The feeling was almost foreign after everything-- Scorpia, Sharkovsky, Moscow

But that feeling was good, good pretending that he and John were just friends in a foreign country. In fact, we were similar enough to be brothers.

Yeah, brothers. Maybe not by blood but brothers. After all, John had taken him under his wing, protecting him from everyone.

I looked at him smiling while petting a dog, motioning me to do the same.

Seriously, where did that dog come from, and how did it trust John so much? I guess he just has that effect on people.... And dogs. Hes a good man. The very best

I don't know what I'd do without him

Subconsciously, I rub the cut on my neck, a reminder of what happened in the jungle.

......

'yassen? Hellooo?' alex calls, nudging me with his elbow.

We sit in Venice, after I took him there after a his mission. There was no way I was simply ignoring him after he took down the Snakehead in operation Reef Encounter. I didn't even know it was going on, I was recovering from my bullet wound. And, since I didn't know where to go, anywhere outside of England, away from Mi6, we came here. He deserved a break, after all.

'yeah? ' I look at him expectantly

'so I know you're this like, (retired) assasin and you night not care for him, but look at this dog! Isn't he cute?' he held up the dog in question, and the beady eyes looked back at me.

'alex, we are on a gondola, and you are carrying a dog almost as tall as yourself' I reply, 'how...? And why.?'

'Oh, but you gotta admit, he's cute' alex shot back, with a grin on his face.

'but either way, Yassen, thanks for taking me here... I needed the break'

I smile in response, steering the boat. Watching the sunset and seeing the tired smile on his face, I realise something.

Although alex is a spitting image of his father, and they're alike in many ways, there's a part of him that's... Alot like how I was. And if he's me from the past, I guess he needs a John in his life too.

I think he looked like me when he had seemed so exhausted, and had that gutted expression. He'd seemed so... Alone.

I mean, everyone he knew had died or betrayed him. That Ash person did both.

Though I wish I got to torture him, not give him a relatively short death

I could make Dr Three seem kind

But now, it's just Alex and I (and the dog) , in the middle of a canal, watching the rays of sunlight shimmer across the water, watching the sky slowly turn from a deep pink to dark blue.

'anything for you, little Alex' I add on the last two words, as an afterthought.

I hope I can save him.

He's not a lost cause

He's still human

He hasn't.... Killed without reason

He's not the current me

'and... That dog, is pretty cool'

I guess, similarly to John, alex also has that effect on everyone.

It's also because his smile warms what little left of a soul I have

I rub the scar once more. I hope John is proud of me, I'll take care of alex for him. I'll become a good person. For him, for alex

Anything for him, he's like a little brother to me.

And with the sunsetting in Venice, with Alex (and the random dog???) half asleep in the seats,

I think we're gonna be OK

[foxymoxynoona]

Ive decided to skip ahead and read book 3 with no context lol so i may be missing lots of details but i know i wont go through with reading the whole thing if i dont skip. Read chapter 4. The fact Jungkook thinks hes “won” is disgusting to me, its not about winning or loosing. I understand his pov but this is just messed up. I think he should getting therapy too honestly he became a star at such a young age thats got to mess u up a bit. Sasha sounds so defeated in her voice mail, I hope she sticks up for herself more bc this group at the tattoo shop seem like trouble. He wants to “fit in and seem cool” bc he doesnt like his bb image which is ok, but he doesnt want to change artists bc he doesnt want ppl to control his life. Im sorry, i would understand this in any logical situation, but this is just outright stupid. You want sasha to support u getting tattoos well she is now! But everytime she looks at them she’ll be reminded of the time they spent apart and the girl he fucked how she supposed to be supportive of that. Also, whats the point of going to ur friends if u don’t take their advice. Oh right, you don’t want their advice, you just want them to be on ur side bc u want to “win”. And not sticking up for your gf, Stop no excuse. He gave her a sexual disease ofc he did smh 🤦‍♀️ Shes just asking u to change artists why are her feelings not valid and naoks (whatever her name is) is. So you kept a promise to support the girl u fucked, but don’t think abt ur gf’s feelings. He said he was thinking of telling her after if his “plan” had gone right, yet she prolly would’ve been upset then too so why are u surprised she yelled in the car. And naiko or whatevers comments were so fucking out of line she def took a photo and is prolly gonna blackmail jk and then hes gonna realize shes not the “cool girl” he thought she was but by then it’ll be too late. Sasha deserves so much better than this man go find a man who doesnt think of arguments as games. Is it wrong that i want jk to face some karma… I was shaking while reading this chapter bc smth similar like this has happend to me b4 so maybe its my emotions talking. Anyways luv u bye~

NO context!!!! 🤣🤣 I can't imagine what that's like, there's sooo much history in the first two books. This feels like a social experiment now hahaha.

I'm so sorry something similar happened to you though! I think scenes like this get very personal feeling when there's overlap with any real lived experiences.

I see the "I won!" thought Jungkook had coming up a LOT with readers, which is in particular very amusing to me. Yeah, no one should be approaching arguments with a partner as win/lose... but really none of y'all ever had that little thought when your partner finally sees your way or agrees to defer to you and you think "fuck yeah, I won" ??? 😂 You are all better people than me. I wouldn't say it but... 🤣

[llorando-en-el-cielo]

doing the TC challenge bc i feel i haven’t really introduced my TC :))

1. describe your tc's physical appearance.

~ roughly 5’0, blonde hair with brown roots, wears glasses , has blue eyes and thin lips

2. what was the first thing you've ever said to your tc?

~ i was lost on the first day because i read my timetable wrong so she gave me directions

3. is your tc single or taken? or are you unsure? and are you single or taken?

~ married for 26 years but it’s okay i can fix her, i’m very single

4. is your tc more of the athletic type, the nerdy type or the artsy type?

~ mix of nerdy and artsy, very appreciative of culture, arts and literature, whilst also very interested in etymology and grammar.

5. if you and your to were in high school together, do you think you'd be friends?

~yesss we’re the only people at the school who like her subject so i think we’d have that in common, plus we have a very similar set of interests and want the same things in life sooo!!

6. name one song that reminds you of your tc and explain why that song reminds you of them.

~ Reel Around the Fountain - The Smiths

“It's time the tale were told, Of how you took a child, And you made him old”

“I dreamt about you last night, And I fell out of bed twice, You can pin and mount me like a butterfly. But, "Take me to the haven of your bed" Was something that you never said”

“Oh, people see no worth in you, Oh, but I do”

7. is your tc fashionable or are they more of the simple type? what is one outfit you'd love to see them wear?

~ very simple, just blazers and trousers with the occasional scarf (suits her so well tho, im weak in the knees fr), i’ve seen pictures of her in jeans tho and i’d sell my soul to see that irl

8. would you be willing to become a teacher and teach your tc's subject if it meant you two could be together?

literally what i want to do in the future

9 . does your tc drink or smoke?

~ she drinks but hates smoking and vaping

10. name one item that is always on your tc's desk.

~ idk man that thing is a mess, but she has like unnecessarily big post it notes that she loves sm??

11. has your to ever done anything that has either thrown you off, annoyed you, angered you or bothered you in any way? if so, what did they do?

~ deadnamed me 💀 but she apologised and now we’re bffs so it’s okay

12. does your tc have any past jobs that you know of, before becoming a teacher?

~ waitressing apparently?? but i think that’s just when she was at uni, she’s always been a teacher

13. does your tc have kids or siblings? if so, how many:

~ 3 siblings and 2 children

14. are you taking your tc's class next year?

~ thankfully yes, but it’s my last year with her im gonna be so sad :((

15. has your tc ever met your parents? if you were there, what was the meeting like?

~ yes several times, they’re all very kind to each other but sometimes i complain to her abt my parents so idk how she actually feels abt them lol

16. has your tc ever given you detention? if so, what was it like?

~ never i’m a child of god

17. has your tc ever failed you? if so, how did you react? if not, how would you react?

~ no , i revise her subject for hours a week so i’d be so pissed if i ever did

18. what are your tc's hobbies/interests? are they similar to yours?

~ we have similar interests bc we both like her subject and i’m pretty sure she enjoys photography. i think that she used to knit bc we always talk about that but idk if she still does

19. have you ever spoken on the phone with your tc? what did you talk about?

~ once but before i was attached to her, it was during lockdown and she wanted to tell me how much she liked my work

20. if you had your tc's class during quarantine, what were your zoom calls like? if not, have you spoken to your tc since quarantine?

~ i don’t really remember but i’d love to sit on call with her now LMAO

21. if you had the chance to go anywhere in the world with your tc, where would you go? what would you do?

~ i’d take her to the sagrada familia bc she loves it (and you can get married there)

22. does your tc have any nicknames for you?

~ no but she thoroughly enjoys seeing me in the corridor and just shouting HUMAN at me

23. have you ever cried in front of your tc? why? how did they react?

~ many times, but she’s very sweet and just lets me sit and process whatever is going on, or tries to distract me as much as possible, and it’s against guidelines to touch me but she said she wished she could give me a big hug sooo

24. have you ever walked/drove to/from school with your tc?

~ noo we live on opposite ends of our town :((

25. do you know which teachers your tc is friends with at school? if so, do you like those teachers?

~ i’ve never really spoken to them much but they all seem quite sweet and i can see why she gets along with them

26. why does your tc's voice sound like?

~ AREEGEJEHDHSJSJDJXJJSSJJS THE BEST NOISE EVER JFJDJHEHDKDJDJDDJ ASMR ISTG

27. do you like your tc as a teacher? are they a good teacher?

~ yes, very, a little disorganised but she has the spirit!!

28. does your tc prefer books, shows or movies?

~ she used to read a lot but idk if she still does, but i think she prefers movies to shows

29. is your tc stern or easy going, in class?

~ very strict, avid rule follower but she’s very sweet as long as you respect her wishes and it annoys me that people get so pissy with her about it?? just listen to her?????

30. how would you describe you and your tc's relationship?

~ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, i hope she likes me and i do think she does and she always seems quite happy to talk to me?

31. do you address your tc by their first or last name?

~ last name, it feels weird to call her by her first name

[boileddogchicken]

haha uh oh i lost track of time i started thinking about a character that i have grown rapidly attached to in the past 24 hours and because i decided she i just like me fr!! but that's not the only reason i'm still awake i was going to write some b'rsh content but i didn't really like where it was going so i started writing shit related to the dnd campaign im going to run eventually (see look i didn't forget abt it existing) but yeah after i decided i was done writing i started thinking more about this fucking CHARACTER like holy shit she is so cool and so pretty and like. there's a lot in her story that just feels so much like me as a person in my own story on this wild ride, this passage of fate (haha get it xenoblade 3 reference that one was for a very specific person i'm mutuals with u know who u are teehee :3) but like anyways dendro muted altered my brain chemistry just a little bit bc i'm like "hey gay plant person who has chronic fatigue and pain who does that sound like" i mean of course i'm a flesh person and not a plant person but yknow. plant people are cool as fuck and if that was a thing irl i would be so good at it oh fuck it's so late i'm going to be so tired tomorrow chronic fatigue and not getting. sleep is such a good combo yknow it's like i'm taking a screenshot- oh shit i don't rlly hurt right now but if i start hurting BEFORE i go to bed that'll further impact my ability to go to sleep and then if that happens more fatigue and more pain it's a fucking cycle oh shit a cycle just like a motorcycle LIKE IN FINAL FANTASY VII i am so good and keeping the same train of thought in a singular post like that's something i pride myself in being able to do i definitely don't get completely sidetracked and talk about xenoblade and final fantasy when i'm trying to talk about webcomics and chronic illness (they're connected remember? that was like my whole thesis since dendro is so neat and reminds me of myself) also this has been a brain thought for like months now but i don't know what to do with it: chthonic illness it's like chronic illness but related to greek mythology underworld is that anything or just similar sounding words OKAY SHIT I SHOULD EEP HAVE A GOOD NIGHT MUTUALS :3 also i almost accidentally had a poll on this post and was just gonna hit send but it didn't let me which meant i learned how to get rid of it (LIKE IN DEATH NOTE) fuck i posted but now i'm editing bc i forgot one thing also that so cool abt dendro from muted (also spoilers for the last couple chapters of muted) BUT ANYWAY by the end of the series she uses a cane and so do i!!!! so yeah more of the whole "she's just like me fr" goin on over here but also good night for real have the night u deserve :3

[freak60000]

tell me abt the characters PEASE their relationships seem so interesting

this ask is old too but oh m GOD. i’m gonna talk about the relationships actualy but there’s so many relationships in this game like SOO many i’m not gonna do all of them here but i’m gonna do some i like. hold on tight and bear with me because i’m autistic and i know how to use it. i’m not doing them all but anyone can send another ask if they wan tto know more ^_^

also this ask made me REALLY happy i just want you to know HEHEE. 💖💖💖💖💖i love talking about my blorbos sosososoo much so this made me giggle and kick my feet while typing u know

okay. okay. i don’t even know where to start so i’ll get the ones im not too invested in out of the way. crypto and caustic HATE EACHOTHER. they are both going under fake identities and they both know it. but ALSO. crypto and caustic are stepbrothers. caustic is the biological son of mystik, an old woman who adopted crypto when he was younger. however crypto and caustic never met (i don’t think) when they were young so they didn’t actually Know this for a very long time until SOMEONEEE (me. pathfinder) literally just Guessed that since their mothers went by similar names that they were the same person. and then i just said bye and FUCKING LEFTTTTT. it was really funny they were both like. …………… see below:

ok next is uhh bloodhound and fuse. fuse joined the games and after a hard journey for the two of them bloodhound became fond of him. he comforted them throughout their journey trying to find themself and blaming themself for their home’s loss and destruction. the voice actors and like half the community ship them really hard so that’s cute i guess. idk if i’d call that canon though but they definitely are SUPER cute when they talk to one another

fuse and maggie OH BOY. OH BOY they were like Besties since they were little little kids. pretty much siblings. almost their WHOLE story is explained with this sfto though if you wanna watch that instead of me explaining. but yeah they hate each other now because fuse Left her and the already diminishing planet of Salvo to fend for themselves, basically selling them off to the syndicate. so yeah fuse is kind of a dick so maggie is furious with him (rightfully)

awwww rampart and mirage awww. they’re so cute. what started off as a bickering friendship between the two blossomed into soemthing mirage could Only define as a sibling bond, reminding him of his brothers (which he had lost). they’re siblings they’re found family and they’re so funny together their relationship makes me cry a little bit in a funny way and a sad way i love them. see below:

crypto and mirage HAHAAAAAA they have this like really gay frienemy thing going on it’s so funny. crypto called him old man and mirage called him kid when they first met even though crypto is literally older than him (there was speculation that he’s like… 28 or soemthing though but idk if that’s true or not) but yeah they’re silly

mirage and pathfinder YAYYYYYYY me and my bestie!!!! it started off as me just being like. annoying to him but then he started to like me and tolerate me and then we became besties. short and sweet but i (canonically and in-game) call him my best boyfriend so. you could say it’s a little Bit Gay but that’s up to you 😋 he loves me even if i’m a little bit silly (this is the same dynamic with wraith but she isn’t as mean to me HEHE) here’s a thing he wrote me after giving me a ton of flowers to cheer me up YAYY:

wattson and caustic ohhh boy. this one’s confusing. father-daughter like bond at first, caustic really admired her work in the science field and she appreciated his admiration. then that bond formed but caustic tried some shady shit in broken ghost because wattson started becoming besties with crypto and wattson REALLY didn’t like that so they like… weren’t friends anymore? and he did some more shady shit and she like electrocuted him and i guess that worked because now he’s like a sad puppy when he talks to her. so yeah idk what happened HAHAH.

last but not least me (pathfinder) and ash. yayyyy. i don’t liek talking about this one because i don’t like the way i was written here but i’ll give you the gist. i foudn her in the dumpster after she was put together and like. saved her i guess because she got rebuilt after. and then she moved in with me and i had a little girlcrush on her for a while (it was one of those “you’re a girl and you’re my friend, so you’re my girlfriend!” things) but she wasn’t interested (the way they wrote me was a little creepy :((( ) and she left. but she joined the games a couple seasons later and i apparently still haven’t let it go because i still. yeah. but yeah after she left i was depressed for like an entire season until my best friend mirage cheered me up ^_^ yay

[cocksuki2]

maybe this is a reach or even crazy but I’ve been thinking abt this since mha chapter 362 when bakugo was announced “dead” and all his antis got happy; but do you think the reason so many people dont like him is because they are just like him? like I’ve really noticed that 99% of his antis act JUST like him but will slander him to the ends of the earth. they always pull the “he told someone to take a swan dive” like they dont tell people to unalive themselves on a regular basis? or throw low blows when in a argument that doesn’t warrant it😭

its seriously baffling how much they hate him but are wayy too similar if not worse than him. and they have insecurity complexes too. it reminds me of gege akutami with gojo, he doesn’t like him but is literally a carbon copy of the character.

PFTT this is a take i didn't even consider but it seems very very likely. also like i don't think they are inherently bad people for disliking katsuki BUT i do think it's stupid and shitty to go yell at people who are sad over it abt how you're celebrating yk??? also weird to not like him in the first place. he's perfect.

but let's just... let's just roll it back a little. GEGE IS WHAT??? HE'S WHAT???!?!?!?! why am i just finding out that gojo is a self insert character?? sorry but does this mean he's hot? not in a sexualizing way or anything but in a genuinely curious. bc ik he doesn't show his face. BYE im gonna go read through interviews for this LMFAOO.

[rexaleph]

Havent said anything abt perfume in so long bc ive been uh unwell but im coming out of it again i think.

Im interested in getting into florals, sth i started thinking abt in late spring. I want a green, wet, vegetal flower. Ive been enjoying Sublime Balkiss by the different company, but idk that it isnt too expensive for what it is. Lasts very little and ultimately it is just kinda a friendly fruity floral. sometimes i think that i just need to make life easier for myself and look into womens designer scents, but then i look at the reviews for Sublime Balkiss and people are like sharp green unisex different. And im like ah ok lol. Really interested in exploring tom ford's Vert Boheme, and that whole vert series in general, tho maybe its discontinued? And also fucking tom ford lmao. Fwiw i have actually tried Vert de Fleur during my last attempt at getting into flowers, and its not really it for me, feels like a sun-dried late summer steppe weeds + lipstick, the opposite kinda flowers from what im looking for. Funnily enough a lot of the reviews are calling it dark, fresh and dewy, which just goes to show that none of these words mean anything to me. (Having washed some of it off and waited a couple hours its much less unpleasant but still not what im looking for. dry bouquet herbal soap vibes)

De Profundis remains the untouchable fantasy BUT Amouage Myths woman seems to go to a similar green-earthy-floral well, while Myths man also has chrysanthemum and is supposed to be smoky which is intriguing (tho apparently also features prominent iris and is generally resinous and leathery). So time to reconsider Amouage perhaps. I occasionally revisit the samples i have and still cant really get into them but they are quite different from each other and idk that its their intrinsic dna that i dont get along with. Also given where de profundis comes from ive decided to stop being such a bitch about serge lutens, and maybe look into them for florals.

When i last thought abt perfume a couple months back I was considering making some purchases this autumn as a reward for hopefully defeating work demons, but im actually gonna be spending money on a trip and some things to do w that, which is a lot more valuable than perfume. However now i also want perfume as well. And idk id like to maybe not accumulate a million samples so i ought to go through what i have and really think about the hows and whys of my perfume experience. When i was depressed just now i still wore perfume every day but really didnt engage w the variety i have access to. I dont think i want to be the single signature fragrance person just bc my one perfume would be vierges et toreros and i cant do that to people, certainly not in the middle of summer lmao. But maybe i can have like... 4. Maybe 9. Fwiw i think ive resolved my search around leathers and animalics and am not interested in trying any more after having found my beloved few, even though some are completely inaccessible to me. Maybe i could write sth up about them. What feels very unresolved to me is fruits, my first big unexpected interest in perfume. Ive tried so many and rn i think i dont like any of them! My fucking samples store shopping cart is full of figs aside from flowers but maybe i should really think about whats wrong w the ones i have. I was gonna do a post abt the fruits as well and was reminded of it just now having had a bad time trying to wear Fig Man.

Anyway i dont think ill buy anything for now regardless, thankfully im good at not spending money. But i will try to have my perfume thoughts.

[clo-thespin]

tw, talks of past addiction and dissociation

im gonna get really deep.

i am feeling the most intense, sudden crave for alcohol right now. its been a while since ive wanted to drink. i relapsed over xmas break bcuz i had nothing to do and the thought crossed my mind and it sounded fun at the time. it wasnt. it wasnt fun, it wasnt worth it. i broke a lot of my parents trust in me and it kind of ruined the holiday vibe.

but i was putting tags on a post and i went to type "im a little silly" and before i could type silly, one of the suggested tags was "im a little drunk". so, after posting that post, i look up that tag because im curious abt the posts under it.

and the typos, the funny stuff people have typed, i want that. i know that life is much happier to me while im drunk.

when i started reading those posts, i could literally feel the way i get flushed, the way everything's just a little blurry, the way my head spins if i move it, how im a little detached from the world.

i might be dissociating. the feeling of my body when ive dissociated is very similar to the feeling of my body when im on something like alcohol, which is probably why i feel like ive drank something. my hands, that dont feel like mine with how clumsily they are moving around, are warm.

i turned off my music because i was planning on turning a yt video on. but i havent done that yet, so my room is silent minus the sounds of my keyboard. silence scares me but when im in an episode like the one i think i might be in now, the fear is so muted. im scared but for so many other reasons that the silence is pushed back and im not aware of it.

i had to check to see what this post was originally about because i zoned out for so long that i forgot. the craving has gone away and behind all this nothing im feeling is a huge ball of yuck. disgust. towards myself. i know its okay to crave things but i will never stop hating myself for it. it reminds me of all the fucked up shit that i did when i wasnt clean.

im really struggling to stay in the moment and not zone out really bad again. i dont know if im typing things that make sense, im really trying to but i dont feel right. im going to stop typing about this now and try to get back to myself because im scaring myself.

[minkkumaz]

omi. omi wtf. OMI WTFF THE 8TURN FICS U WROTE WERE ACTUALLY INSANE?? IVE NEVER FELT SO SWOONY OVER AN 8TURN FIC?? ur THEEE 8turn writer ever.

okay heres how it went, i read the seungheon one first, AND IT WAS SO?? CUTE?!!?? KWKDJJCJF mutual pinning is such a cute thing to write i absolutely adored it. then i like took a study break, let the seungheon delusions marinate in my head until i remembered you had a yungyu one…

UR MAKING HIM MY BIAD WRECKER. omi. OMIII i literally cant with the fic it was so perfect, i felt so so SOOO immersed, u always write in such an appealing way for readers to get hooked into the story fast! ><

reading that yungyu fic changed me, i feel like a brand new person. i LOVED LOVED LOOOVED the ending, it was just absolutely well made. I think i have a new thing for badboy goodgirl tropes.. Normally, the ones I read make the reader too stuttery and jumpy, but you captured the theme so well ^^

ahh i feel like rereading it as im writing this, all my compliments come straight from the heart i really realllly REALLY enjoyed the yungyu one!! (have to agree its one of the best u’ve ever written, IM DUCH A FANN.) When yungyu just whisked us away in a dance and just,, i seriously cant stop gushing abt it. its gonna be on my mind for weeks, the storyline was so cute 😭😭😭💔💔

SUPER HAPPY YOU RECOMMENDED THAT TO ME, like how was i living before that beautiful fic.. BADBOY TROPES>>

i was wondering if you’re gonna do anything similar to it someday? bonedo ver perhaps?! 👀👀 (reminds me of that heartbroken woonhak idea you told me abt ><)

-🍉 (seriously im abt to reread the yungyu fic im so happy rn.)

STOP IT EVERYTIME YOU POP (you might aswell be nayeon><) INTO MY INBOX I AM ALWAYS BLUSHING AND THROWING UP EVERYWHERE YOU ARE SO SWEET :'[ you genuinely make my day like i was having such a shit morning T_T

i'm happy you liked the seungheon one, i was hoping you would! i tried to make him very true to how people my age would act and how feelings are just super sucky and can be confusing :( i'm glad the point got across and it was fluffy enough for you :3

and aghh spreading the yungyu love makes me so happy! i love love loved writing that fic and i have a little confession.. i am going to write a part 2 because i lost a bet to jordan and she also loved it as much as i did hehe.

this bad boy persona i wrote for him was actually so attractive to me i was giggling after EVERY line. and the fact that he wasn't even that much of a bad boy and moreover a misunderstood boy :,)

seriously your feedback makes me so happy, and if you really like the trope that much ill see what i can do :) THERES A FIC I ALRESDY HAVE PLANNED THAT I COULD PROBABLY INCORPORATE THAT INTO IT SO.. IM GONNA COOK IT UP!!

love u my melon anon<3

[minmin-pal]

I was floored when I searched jjba in the site I usually watch anime at and there were so many options, i kinda got confused but i found a 'watch order complete guide' so that's fixed but i never knew jjba didn't have that many fillers? apparently, all the ova's related to the story so it's recommended to not skip anything, excited to watch it tbh, long continuity types r a grind but the complex storylines are pretty rewarding when they finish im p sure, excited to see the animation too tbh

and ohh u both watched the prev seasons together? were you both able to understand the plot properly? (/genquestion/lyttheart) it never rlly occured to me that people watch anime 2gether since i usually rewind a lot (/lytheart) and oh wait, i'll make sure to hold off on reading the manga till after i finish watching the show then, ty for the warning :')! (/gen)

even though it got spoiled for you, i hope you were still able to enjoy stone ocean! (/gen) and yea i'm gonna need to agree, the character design for j geil is so wel-done it actually warrants an actual physical reaction from the audience (physical "yikes" from me lol), it really does fit his character or what i assume his characterization is meant to be xp does it make sense that the first time i saw his design i assumed his head was either: a rotten food or literal turd? idk haha(/lytheart) the art style definitely is dynamic and unique i can agree (/positive)

and ohh, using album song names as attack/power names is actually so clever, i don't know if i would've understood the reference until a few weeks but yeah it is deffo really smart(/gen) is there any other similar references like that? and woah, so kira is like a very plot relevant char (at least for those seasons im assuming) and oh part 1/2 are different from the others? looking forward to seeing how tbh but i'll find out when i watch that scene :D (/positive) a 'flaw' btw? i'm resisting the urge to find posts about it and watch for myself (/joke/lytheart) that sounds super cool

and i just searched for 'jjba part 4 rohan blue hair' scene, i don't know if i found it but i found some other scenes with different and p unique colorings. i'm really curious how they integrated that with the anime actually though i imagine it was around the fight scenes since those scenes typically have the most effects? and woah, his design definitely looks nice tbh, i don't know why but the bit about you saying "kinda cuz theyre pretty not bizarre (in comparison.)" reminds me of that one meme with the guy in yu-gi-oh w/ the normal hair as opposed to literally even in the series lol

and ohh, on rohan, i haven't seen many 'self-insert' type characters, at least not ones that have had good fandom reception?) but he does actually sounds really cool as a character from what you've said, i'm looking forward to seeing him carry the manga economy for a bit haha, that'd actually be a good promotion stunt now that i think abt it lol and yea no worries, ramblings r ver fun to read (/lytheart)

tbh i haven't seen much from csm aside from the makima memes and a fanart about one of the demon designs but it deffo looked very cool! and ohh, kobeni? she's a major character ryt? i never knew her name before but she looks super pretty tbh, and yay i'm glad you like her,! (/lh) i've heard the series gets kinda dark at some scenes? not sure about the specifics really, but from the scenes you've shown of him, denji's humor is pretty funny ngl xD and yikes for makima, idk anything about her tbh but if it's major spoilers i assume it's important to the story,, and yeah not liking her as a person is p understandable :'))

you've mentioned you read spyxfam and kimi ni koisuru satsujinki(found out the english trans is something like 'Killer In Love')? could I ask what you like about those? any scenes stuck out to you? liked and disliked chars maybe? (feel free to skip any questions btw!) slice of life is definitely a very fun genre tbh, is there maybe any anime/manga/whichever media that you don't particularly like maybe? or your just not that fond of? (random question so feel free to skip if you'd like to again btw) this got a tad long lol, sorry bout that! take care and thank you for answering the past few asks i've sent :D (/gen)

last bit- ur new pfp and banner looks super cool btw! is that kobeni? i just noticed the pins on her hair lol so i'm p sure, looks nice (/gen/lytheart) i was replying while reading the post btw so some bits from this myt not make 2 much sense--

YAYAYAYA the certified best way to watch it is to watch part 1 & 2 (phantom blood + battle tendency in the same like period of time?? like dont take a break after phantom blood ends (by break i mean stop watching for a month) then you watch 3, 4, then the rohan kishibe ova's. if ur in it for the fact its jojo id say to watch the anime ova version, then to watch the live action one later whenever you feel like it- its jojo but not art so it doesnt really pack that exact same punch after the ovas you watch part 5 and then 6 the one thing i'll say about jojo (other than every other thing ive said :D) is that araki does not give a fuck he WILL kill the characters you love and he will NOT feel sorry even the main character isnt safe i honestly would not reccommend reading past part 6's manga because part 7, 8 and 9? havent been animated yet the mangas just good to read because its the original you feel araki's like self in it (more) or whatever

(this is a Long one. like genuinely)

we both understood the plot really well jojo can be confusing, but.. almost... everything is eventually cleared up and its great also ,. the FORESHADOWING in this series is unreal. it does not exist thats how crazy it is /j

i still enjoyed stone ocean aswell i knew what happened but it still was like "w w o w that just happened" also it was the first time id seen cgi used in anime and it was super cool

the using song names for abilities stuff is like, really reoccuring i think almost every power after part 2 has some musical/tarot connection theres a lot more obvious (?) examples of this like "man in the mirror" named after the michael jackson song, or notorious b.i.g, or the one named metallica depending on the kind of music you like its more easier to pick up on the references

kira is VERY plot relevant. so plot relavant i insist you do not search him up at all it might be hard cuz ive been gassing him up but once you get there youll see why part 1/2 are different for a big reason which will become immediately clear 10 minutes into part 3 for that reason a lot of people say to skip the first two parts when starting but i just say No....? like. theyre plot relevant, they set the stage, and they bring in joseph and jonathan!!!! those guys are amazing and telling people to skip those part because what? cause its not like the rest is such a slap in the face them not being the same is the point!! part 1 and 2 are set way back like way back like with cowboys so theyre not going to have the stuff/ thing that made part 3 forward different because they just werent there technology wise!!! part 1 is such a charming part because jonathan is literally such a sweet heart like SUCH a sweetheart and part 2 is brought together by joseph and these other 2 characters (spoilers) plus part 1 is literally the most important season ever. i wont say why but. it is. season 3 only works because of the stuff it takes from 1 and 2, literally in show or just in like writing or art (as in the people from part 1 and 2, and the way the storys work) I AM RAMBLING.

uhhh rohans coloring switches and all or the big color changes like

that ^ aren't always cause of big scenes (though that one kinda is) thats whats cool about it though?!?!?!

honestly i think rohan started as a self insert but just became araki's favorite character which is so fun because its like no way a side-ish character got his own ova AND live action version hes just him (on the topic of the live action rohan ova--- i am SO glad they didnt make him. irl anime. becuz like whats the point then just watch the anime hes honestly just real rohan and its great they didnt make the actor dye his hair neon green or anything)

the devils in csm are super cool i love the designs cuz theyre. they re all so unique :DD i dont recall which but one of them really reminded me of like the collosal titan from aot (which is another show i really like) uhh you should def not search up ANYTHING having to with aot also like jojo its a series i watched with my brother :D he'd already watched it but he wanted to show it to me ANYWHP denji reminds me of joseph from jojo humor wise sorta. like ever so slightly (i kinda like denji more cuz hes just he makes me do that little throat laugh where you make no sound but you did definitely laugh

about sxf and killer in love it seems well ill staft with spy family but i love it because . found family is one of my favorite tropes ever ALSO LOID AND ANYA/ ANYA AND YOR'S RELATIONSHIPS R SO SWEET i have never awwed over fictional characters like i awwed over everyone in spy family

theyre so. :holding_back_tears:

i jus love how sweet it is. killer in love though i love for.... sorta the opposite reason i first liked it because the way the mc felt about this girl was just. really the same as how i feel about this.... one girl... ive mentioned her before i think so flatout i like it cuz i related to the mc but BUT hes kinda a serial murderer which is why i have to ask you to take everything i say with a grain of salt he is one flawed mc. like hes fucked actually hes mental but like.... i get it.... like i reread it and the entire time i was like yeah you do you bro i get it. ALSO ITS GENUINELY SO GREAT WRITING WISE AND VISUALLY it has no right being as pretty as it is visually like i censored the words cuz theyre spoilers but

its!! ITS SO its so prettyyyyy.... (also i really cant show where i relate to the mc-- cuz theyre spoilers aswell really but!! i can show you him

idk if itd register but he was ALWAYSS my layouts until really recently usually him and this one scene where he's holding a knife as the banner

for spy family i have no characters i hate honestly, but for killer in love i heavily dislike this one boy.

i dislike him so much... that i . dont remember his same

hes just not it if you read it youll see why theres another character like him,you actually meet him wayyy before this guy, and theyre both bad in the same way but the other guy is just so pathetic that i cant hate him. cause like i get it

uhhh i dont really like isekais or fanservice romance animes if its a romance anime and the main character is a brown haired boy, i 9/10 times skip it cuz theyre usually a miss the only isekai ive ever stomached is devil is a part timer and i just couldnt watch season 2 this one isnt particularly a genre but if the female interest looks 15 and has. double d's not that there arent girls built like that but if you cant make good female designs, you probably cant write a good story either (the only exception being one piece- but holy hell i cannot watch it. i know its great but what is. THIS?)

they all are the same girl and then you look at the male designs you get

are they from the same show????

another trope.. well design i hate and throws me off is Thigh Highlights. chest highlights. shoulder highlights. this one more applys to artists than anime honestly but 9 times out of ten if someone does little white highlights on their big breasted teenage looking characters chest they probably like little kids i have to say it 9/10 times they love children thats just how it is second i notice the shading like that i just cant trust them

also i dont mind how long it got dwdw im super glad you send these cause it always has me rethinking on stuff i like and forming newer opinions really :))

the new layout is kobeni!! im glad it looks nice to you :D (also the lengths okay with me.. usually t takes me a while to formulate everything so i go back and forth with drawing and continunt these... which is why some ideas might feel disconnected... everything made sense though) ive gotta like. give you a aname or something youre..... uhh idk if youd feel comfortable sharing so u are. uuh custard? :D

[drawnaghht]

Gonna be honest, aside from fandom events/celebrations I'm prob not gonna be very active here again, on account of busy-in-general but also, my side-accounts are still always more art-oriented.... I like to post my own arts hehe x3 so I guess I'm writing abt this as a gentle reminder to myself that it's alright to not be active & how much I really enjoy posting my own work when possible.

some more thoughts on this under cut! the blog will stay mostly usagi chronicles related with reblogs related to other usagi stuff and tmnt but I will try to keep it to my own art as I originally intended.

right now I've also been obsessing again over the Tintin fancomics and animations by @/professorcalculusstanaccount (not gonna tag them bc this is not directly related) and their work (+ just ruminating on my own old stuff) has been inspiring me enough that I'm thinking of returning to my og comics again. just in a... very subtle way. i don't like drawing attention to myself as much(as much as I should at least) and I wanna take a lot of babysteps to get back to building those up again.

for my SRTUC/TMNT2003&ROTTMNT crossover fic, I am thinking now that I want to take a similar approach in that it is mostly images, some larger text. bc I realized I do not actually enjoy writing long spans of prose. like. I enjoy making comics bc I am more used to those, but also, I am imagining things much more visually so it is hard for me to put some of these into text form at all times. I think that's why I probably haven't written this fic properly or finished any of my old fic. So a pretty normal "I explain my fic/AU idea" post, but I would like to try it in a concentrated way. I dunno how I would format this crossover on AO3 for example, but here in tumblr I could put them neatly under a cut and write away. It would be cool if I had the energy for animations/comics too bc those, while taking more time than writing, are far more enjoyable on the whole to make (but again, I am much more used to them)

I also want to explore more of a genfic (general "genre" fanfic) look at crossovers. As much as I like the Yuinardo/Leochi (Yuichi x Leo) ship, I also really enjoy exploring more unusual dynamics and situations in fanfic haha x3

my health's been slowly declining this week again and i haven't noticed next to work so I'll try to keep phone and personal internet time to a minimum now. sjdnddj i also just haven't had the energy for new art in general, so I'm basically going into spring hibernation until the next big spike in free time.

but hey! things I look forward to posting about more are some of the short comic thumbs I've been doing! I've fanart mostly for usagi chronicles right now but I'm also probably gonna post other short sketches I've done on my regular fandom art/ sketchblog, @aghhtdraws . There's a Chi/Ki (Chizu x Kitsune) doodle post I wanted to do and also a few other Usagi sketches I wanted to post.

I also like to write analysis of shows I like often enough, but writing is usually very taxing for me if it gets too long so I try to avoid it unless I have a very strong idea. Wait... have I been writing essays this entire time??? x3

I'll still tag those as #analysis bc that makes sense for me as a short tag and I don't really keep to an essay format as much, but yeah, you can block that or #aghhtposts if u don't wanna see those xP

i tag things more for my own convenience, but that is also very useful for tag blocking! (so glad xKit still works 10 years after it broke or smth)

oh! and I also wanted to post some screenshots/links from insta. both Stan and some of the crew have been posting new posts about SRTUC which have been a delight to see. ahhh im so glad the show exists and the crew seem to have a lot of good memories about it.

[birdmans]

psychological study who’s ur favorite roy sibling and what’s ur ordinal position [eldest, only child, etc]

[raven-paww]

Okay i posted a joke thing abt how much I hate these characters but !!!! I need to elaborate/rant so here we go! Here's why I hate Lilith, mark beaks, Sasha, odalia, bramblestar, bumblestripe, Ashfur, and thistleclaw

Spoiler warning for TOH, DuckTales, amphibia, and warrior cats

Trigger warning for racism, manipulation, child abuse, emotional/mental abuse, emotional neglect, just incels in general, implied SA, and child grooming/pedophilia.

FIRST UP LILITH

OKAY

I don't hate her as much as the others. I just think her redemption was really rushed.

Also, her "then why were you SO easy to curse!?" line pisses me off to no end bc.. ma'am??? She was. A child???? And was SLEEPING???? THAT ISNT REALLY AN ACCOMPLISHMENT LILY

next up: mark beaks. Oh my god mark beaks.

He's racist. For those of y'all who haven't seen DuckTales '17 (or didn't pick up on this), here's a bit of a summary of why he's racist.

Mark has a tendency to call everyone around him "buddy". When he first met GizmoDuck, in costume (not seeing literally anything besides the robot suit and his beak), he did the same thing; "hey, buuddy!" But then, later in the episode, when Fenton (GizmoDuck) is hired by mark's company, and he sees that Fenton is Latino, that's when he breaks out the "chico", "amigo", and "muchacho". He refers to his house as "casa de GizmoDuck" or his girlfriend as "lady muchacho".

So yeah. Racist.

NEXT! SASHA!!

I should put the disclaimer that part of my hatred for her is fueled by the fact that she reminds me of someone I used to know, but that's a traumatic rabbit hole nobody cares abt <3

I knew pretty much from the start that I was gonna hate her- see above- but oh my god. One, she stood with the oppressors in amphibia, the toads. It's shown in multiple s1 episodes that toads have a tendency to abuse, take advantage of, and extort the frogs of Wartwood (see: Toad Tax, season 1 episode 10; Mayor Toadstool's whole character). Not even gonna get into the implications this has abt Sasha being the only white girl in the Calamity trio. Sasha saw this, and she SAW how much the frogs meant to Anne, but she still created the plan to kill Hop Pop. Y'know, the adopted grandfather of her supposed best friend? She used the excuse of "they're just frogs 🙄" but she was fully aware of how sentient they were!! FROGS R PEOPLE TOO BITCH!!

Two: She knows how bad of a person she is, and acknowledges it, but she makes NO. EFFORT. to improve herself. BEING A GOOD PERSON REQUIRES WORK. REDEMPTION REQUIRES WORK. IT DOES NOT HAPPEN BY JUST SITTING AROUND WALLOWING IN YOUR FUCKING SELF PITY. She wormed her way back into Anne's good graces but it was ONLY TO BETRAY HER AGAIN. I know y'all r gonna pull that "she's only 13 🥺" bull on me, but I don't care. A normal mistake for a 13 year old is to cheat on a test, not overthrow a kingdom.

That one was a doozy.

Odalia's is fairly simple. She's a child abuser. End of story.

BRAMBLESTAR. FUCKING. BRAMBLESTAR. IM NOT GONNA ELABORATE ON THE SITUATION W SQUILF HERE MUCH BC MOONKITTI EXPLAINED IT SM BETTER THAN I COULD IN THE VIDEO "bramblestar is worse"

HE ALSO CHOOSES FAVORITES W HIS KIDS. HE VERY CLEARLY FAVORS SPARKPELT AND BARELY SHOWS AFFECTION TO ALDERHEART. EMOTIONAL GODDAMN NEGLECT

FUCK OFF BRAMBLEFUCK FANS

Bumblestripe is a Nice Guy™. When Dovewing clearly says "NO, IM NOT INTERESTED IN BEING YOUR MATE" he's like "that's fine I'll ask u tomorrow <3 luv u" HE DOESNT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER ALSO I WANNA THROTTLE HIM

okay Ashfur has a similar thing going on but it's mixed with yandere. he tried to kill 3 kids bc their mom broke up with him. Jesus Christ. he continues to hate her and fuck up her life from beyond the grave. also this, though it was almost definitely unintentional

he's a good villain though

thistleclaw is a pedophile. so yeah.

[gorseflowers]

Favorite Characters Tag Game

Rules: List your favorite character from 10 different fandoms and then tag 10 people.

Tagged by: @section-69 thank you for this chance to ramble

random order also ive just got done ranting with my flatmate abt prophecy narratives so this is gonna be intense im riled up

faith lehane from btvs, my bestest worstest woman forever and always, i absolutely could not fix her i love her so so much

worf from star trek. gonna see him again in picard s3 and my brain is On Fire about it. he’s been written so inconsistently to put it politely over the years if they fuck this up i will wreak violence, telling the 6′4 klingon warrior to get behind me babygirl i’ll defend your character from defamation

captain isabel lovelace from wolf 359. on all levels except physical i am wrapping her in my arms. i think about desperate measures and i go fucking insane. if you call her the “villain” of s2 you and i have a fucking problem. shoutout to hilbert minkowski and eiffel whom i am chewing the doorframe over also

abed nadir from community. choosing just one of the study group was a very gun to the head deal but i will tell you at length why abed is one of the best characters ever written for television so i feel like it has to be him. 

James Flint. very similar situation of how do i just choose one when half the characters of black sails live rent free in my heart and head but uhh yeah james flint realigned my worldview and my sense of self

nandor the relentless from what we do in the shadows. i am going to mug him i am going to steal his cloaks and i am going to wear them every day for the rest of my life. i love other things about him very deeply but its so important you know that every day im thinking about those cloaks.

geralt from the witcher. i feel like him and ciri were specifically tailored for me at this exact time of my life to wreck me in every way. he committed so hard to being a loving caring father for her nobody fucking look at me.

abigail kamara from rivers of london. i wrote a fucking character study thesis fic for her based off a bonus short story in the back end of lies sleeping and THEN ben aaronovitch came out with her whole novella and did i miss? did get a single character beat wrong when i extrapolated from next to nothing? no i did not. that was my magnum opus. 

thor from m*rv*l. i just think he’s neat

hellboy, although ive not read the comics i just watch the gdt films when i was younger and latched onto him which reminds me im always saying ill draw him and then i never draw him

Tagging: @flintcoded, @blacksailsgf, @runestele and anyone else who wants to do it!