#im screaming solely because Ive only now had enough of an out in sight to make sense of just how bad this had been

[system-of-a-feather]

I literally can't believe we are on our way to having our own job and regular income and supporting our rent by ourselves for ourselves soon. The relief at the idea of cometely shedding dependence on my family and actually opening up the open world that is life sounds so fucking nice. I feel like I've been railroaded in a torturous tutorial mission for 22 years. The fucking grind to do everything perfect just to advance to the next stage and get out of the railroad andninto the open world makes the first two hours of Cyberpunk NOT sound and look tedious jesus fucking christ.

-Riku

[mysticmylifeisamess-enger]

Cupid’s Texts

Happy (early) Valentine’s from your secret admirer @umbrella-kun <3 We both have mutual fav boys and it made it SO easy to write for you, so I hope you like your gift of a nervous, blushy Saeran (✿◠‿◠) (p.s. I googled ‘expensive wines’ so the Chateau mentioned in this is worth $3,500 sorry jumin)

Thank you @mysmevalentinesdayexchange for hosting!

Pairing: Saeran/MC (though I did try to fit some details of your CMC)

Word count: 2,816

Summary: Sometimes, cupid isn’t a baby in a diaper shooting arrows. Sometimes cupid is a red-headed hacker who uses his friend’s money.

Saeran really couldn’t take his eyes off you. While you had everyone’s attention as you spoke, you captivated him in an entirely different sense. The beating in his chest rapid, palms sweaty, and completely entranced with the kind look on your face as you went on. The blush on his cheeks deepening as he let his mind wander, unrealistic scenarios of you two together running through his mind. He wasn’t entirely focused on your words, but he found himself eyeing your lips, curious as to how they would feel against his.

“Saeran?” you asked, bringing him out of his thoughts as he looked around to see all eyes on him. For a whole minute there, it really felt like it was just you two in the room and he completely forgot he was at an RFA meeting, planning for the next party.

“I-I’m sorry, what, um, what were we talking about?” he stammered, his face turning beet red at the attention directed at him. Before you said anything, you’re hand went to his forehead, feeling the radiating heat that seemed to double at your touch. Even with how embarrassed he was, he still found himself focused on the concerned look on your face.

“You’re burning up, are you feeling okay?”

“I’ve never been better,” he replied, averting his gaze and letting out a puff of air he didn’t realize he was holding onto. Though he looked somewhat collected, his mind was racing a million miles a second. Wondering just why, out of all the responses he could come up with, did he say that. Why did the entire RFA have to witness that and what exactly are they thinking behind their judging eyes. And why on earth couldn’t he couldn’t just evaporate in this moment.

One he finally met your gaze again, he was surprised to see you still look worried. You took a step back, still examining his face before taking a seat.

“Alright, well if you need to step out for any reason, don’t hesitate to,” you said, attention back on the stack of papers from which you were presenting to the group.

“Smooth,” the voice next to him whispered for only Saeran to hear. It was met with a jab of the elbow to Saeyoung’s rib

As the meeting went on, Saeran’s eyes trailed back to you every once in a while, even when you weren’t talking. To him, you looked so cute with the absolute thoughtful look on your face. How someone could look so perfect without doing much was beyond him. After a while, his thoughts were interrupted by a buzzing in his pocket, checking his phone under the table so no one would notice.

‘You know what next week is, right?’ sent by the red-head next to him. Saeran looked over to see his eyes focused on Jumin as he spoke, but hands tapping away at the phone hiding under the table.

‘Why are you asking me this in the middle of the meeting?’ Saeran typed out and sent, met with an almost immediate response.

‘Because I’m trying to look out for you here. Now do you know or do I have to remind you?’

“I know it’s Valentine’s day next week, I don’t understand why you’re telling me this now, but get to your point before Jumin sees.’

‘Because I think you should ask MC on a date before you leave today.’

‘That’s not going to happen,’ he simply wrote, giving his twin a roll of the eyes.

‘Why not? Don’t you like her??’

‘No,’ Saeyoung let out a loud laugh at that, startling the rest of the group. Once he collected himself, he noticed Jumin staring daggers in their direction.

“Is there something you’d like to share with the rest of us?” he asked, obviously irritated by the interruption.

“Actually yes,” Saeyoung said, getting up from his seat to address the room. A small flash of panic in Saeran’s eyes, not knowing exactly what he was going to say or where this would lead.

“It has been a while since we’ve had a get-together outside of these meetings. I feel a real distance between myself and you all. It’s like I don’t even know you guys anymore,” he continued, “A real wedge has been driven between me and my fellow members and I won’t stand for it any longer.”

“Your point?” Jumin piped up.

“My point is that we should all have dinner together next week, spend some time together, get to know MC since she is our newest member. We can go out to a nice restaurant, have some drinks and just talk. It’s about time we take the ‘i’ out of ‘team’ and put the ‘friendship’ right back in it,” he said, looking around the room for a reaction only to see some pensive looks. After a moment of utter silence, Zen finally spoke up.

“I think that would be great, actually.”

“Yeah,” Yoosung agreed.

“I’m all for it,” you smiled eagerly, “Saeran, what do you think?”

“Yeah, um, t-that sounds great,” Saeran’s face deepened in color, averting his gaze to the floor.

Saeyoung eyed the remaining two, Jaehee and Jumin, for approval. They looked at each other, having a silent conversation with glances before Jaehee finally looked to Saeyoung.

“We can make time for it in our schedule,” Jaehee answered, Jumin nodding in agreement, “We’ll make the accommodations and-“

“Actually,” Saeyoung intervened, “let me take care of that. I suggested it so it’s only fair that I take care of the arrangements. Let’s say Thursday the 14th?”

“On Valentine’s day? Some of us could be busy that day,” Jumin said.

“Look around the room and tell me who honestly could have plans here. Do you need me to pull up the track record for everyone’s dating life?” Saeyoung said, earning a collective and defensive ‘hey’ from the other members.

“Am I wrong? Show of hands, who would be too busy with a date that day,” he spoke once again, a silence through the room at the lack of hands that went up, “Thought so. I’ll text everyone the details later. Jumin, proceed.”

He took his seat again, a small, devious smirk on his face as he looked at his brother. It was a look that alarmed Saeran, knowing it meant he had something up his sleeve. Whatever it is he had in store, he could at least be comforted by the fact that the rest of the RFA would be there.

~

The tie around Saeran’s neck felt uncomfortable, not used to having to dress so formal. Why Saeyoung chose such a sophisticated place to get together was beyond him, but he agreed to it nonetheless. Though, he only really agreed to it for the sole purpose of seeing you on Valentine’s day. Even if it wasn’t truly a date, the idea of spending this time with you, today of all days, was enough for him.

His hands instinctively went to loosen the tie as he rounded the corner of the restaurant, though he didn’t expect to see you right outside, alone, and waiting. His jaw practically slacked at the sight of you dressed so formally. It wasn’t until he got closer that he noticed all the small details that truly captured his heart. And the smile you flashed once you noticed him took his breath away.

“Thank god you didn’t cancel on me like the rest did,” you said, only gaining a quizzical look from him.

“Did you not read the messenger?”

“No, I just-“ though the words died in his throat once he looked at his phone to find a single text.

‘Reservation’s under my name. Good luck on your date~’ sent 3 minutes ago by his brother. He should have known that he’d pull this kind of stunt, wondering just where exactly he was holding the rest of the RFA captive. The idea of being alone with you almost terrified him, but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t happy for this.

“I guess it’s just us two then,” he said, pocketing his phone and biting back the wide smile that threatened to spread.

“Yeah, I guess it is,” you paused, meeting his gaze, “though I have to be honest, I’m kinda glad it’s just us.”

His eyes widened at your words, curious if he heard you right. The sincere look in your eyes, the soft smile as you looked at him confirmed just that. And for a split second, he almost wanted to thank his brother for setting this up.

“Really?”

“Well, yeah. I enjoy your company and any opportunity I have to spend time with you is one I will gladly take,” you said, smiling as you signaled towards the door, “now come on, there’s an empty table of seven and a dinner I’ll have Jumin reimburse waiting in there.”

He could only laugh as he followed, holding the door open for you. The restaurant was much nicer on the inside than you two expected, making your way through the crowded lobby to find where he needed to check in.

“Hi, reservation for Saeyoung Choi,” Saeran said to the hostess. They scanned the list in front of them, meeting his gaze once they found the name.

“Right this way mister and missus Choi,” they chimed, ushering you two to the dining room. He couldn’t help but flush at the implication, seeing you equally as red. He could almost hear Saeyoung cackling about this. Though he had to admit, it had a nice ring to it.

The table you two were brought to practically screamed ‘romance.’ It was secluded, covered in a seemingly expensive sheet with just as pricey silverware sitting atop, and by candlelight to contrast the dimly lit ambiance. The string music in the background carried the lovey-dovey feeling in the air, only adding to how absolutely flustered he was getting. Looking around, you two noticed the place was filled almost entirely of couples, obviously celebrating their love on this holiday.

He pulled out one of the seats for you, tucking it in once you settled in. You offered him a sincere smile, a silent ‘thank you’ at his mannerism as he took his own seat across from you. Once he looked at you, he felt his breath catch in his throat, stunned and overwhelmed by how truly beautiful you looked in this moment.

The way your eyes reflected by the candlelight passed your glasses had him awestruck, mouth hanging slightly as he took in every detail. The freckles on your face were like constellations he’d never tire of counting, a clear night sky he could easily get lost in. Your hair falling perfectly, almost serving as a halo that perfectly framed your face. His hand wanted so badly to reach for your own across the table, but he refrained.

“Your waiter will be with you shortly,” the hostess said, leaving you two and bringing Saeran out of his thoughts to realize he had just been staring at you.

“I, um, I’m sorry,” he stammered, eyes falling to his own hands that sat clasped on the table.

“For what?” you asked, a small laugh escaping as your hand found his, giving him a comforting touch. If it was humanly possible, he would have melted into a puddle from that, blush intensifying as he met your eyes once again. The sincere curiosity in them made his heart do leaps, trying to find some sort of reply.

“For starters, I’m sorry everyone seemed to have cancelled last minute.”

“What can you do?” you shrugged before continuing, “Though now that you mention it, it is odd that Saeyoung chose a place with this setting for a get together, what’s that about?”

“I think I have a hunch,” he sighed, gaining a tilt of the head in an unspoken question from you. There were few moments in his life he felt as nervous as he did in this moment, swallowing hard as he decided whether he would tell you his true feelings or not. He could never truly deny you of what you wanted, be it a favor or, in this instance, an answer. And especially not when you looked at him like that.

“The thing is-“

“Good evening mister and missus Choi, I’ll be taking care of you tonight,” a voice intervened with a bottle of wine in hand, “I have a Chateau Petrus courtesy of a ‘Cupid Choi.’”

“Cupid Choi?” you asked, seeing Saeran bury his face in his hands.

“Saeyoung, you son a-“

“Thank you for the wine, you can just leave it. We’ll still need a minute,” you smiled up at the waiter as they turned on their heel.

“As you were saying,” you said, regaining his attention as you went to pour the wine in the glasses. He reached for his own glass, meeting your attentive gaze once again. Whatever shred of confidence he had faltered in the last few seconds.

“The thing is,” he trailed, pausing to think his next words carefully, “Saeyoung couldn’t come because he was sick. He’s wanted to come here for a while and used this outing as an excuse to get Jumin to pay for it.”

“That’s really your hunch?” you asked, Saeran nodding in assurance.

“Yeah, that’s the thing,” he said simply, though he didn’t notice the dubious expression on your face, eyeing him as he took a long swig of his glass.

He put his feelings on the back of his mind, settling on just enjoying this evening with you. You two talked and laughed the entire time. To him, this felt natural. It felt like everything he had been looking for in his life, but he just couldn’t bring himself to tell you that. To him, you were a dream come true, but could never be his reality.

A few hours of you two drinking and talking came and went, The check that was brought was already paid for by ‘Cupid Choi,’ along with bouquet of flowers sent to the table as the final touch to this entire scheme. You two made your way out, idle chitchat along the way until you two were outside.

Alright, so the thing is?” you asked, stopping in front of him. He gave you a quizzical look, wondering just what you were asking.

“Oh come on, don’t try to tell me that what you wanted to say in there was that Saeyoung couldn’t come because he was sick. That doesn’t explain why everyone cancelled at the last minute. What’s really going on?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said passively.

“Saeran, I can see right through this act. Now tell me what the thing is, what you were going to say?”

“The thing is,” he paused, biting his cheek before he continued, “Saeyoung set this up. I didn’t know about it until I got here, but his original intent was to get us alone. The table, the wine, and the flowers were his small touches.”

“Why would he have to set this up?”

“Because he knows that I have feelings for you,” he finally said, looking to see the stunned expression on your face, though that didn’t diminish his train of thought.

“Everything about you captivates me so wholly and I find myself wanting to know more about you. When I’m around you, my throat closes up, the beating in my chest races, and I sweat more than usual. But that never seems to matter if only it means that I’m with you. You’ve made my world seem much lighter since you’ve come into it and I only ever want to make you as happy as you’ve made me.”

The air in-between you two felt thick, silence taking it’s place. For a few seconds, though it felt like an eternity, you two only looked at each other, processing the words that had just been spoken. The beating in his chest felt like it was pounding in his ears, trying to decipher just what the look you were giving him meant. Were you angry? Were you sad? Did he just make an ass out of himself? Why aren’t you saying anything??

Though all those thoughts were thrown out as soon as you leaned in, tip-toeing to press your lips to his. Your hand tangled into his hair, pulling him down as his found the nape of your neck to deepen the kiss. You could feel the small smile that tugged on his lips, wrapping an arm around to pull you closer to him. He felt like he was on air, elated as he pulled away.

“In case that didn’t say it, I feel the same way,” you said, hands toying with his collar as he still held you. He laughed, leaning back down, inches from your lips.

“Happy Valentines Day,” he whispered, claiming your lips as his once again.

[cvrsedink]

A Bellatrix Lestrange One-Shot

*It’s been a very long time since I’ve occupied her head space, so she is a bit rusty. I hope you enjoy it anyway!

Dreams turned into nightmares every time she shut her eyes. The sounds of low moans and cries for help filled her ears as if she were still there, chained to the salty stones in her cell, starving, weak, and alone. Only when the waves crashed against the sides of the towering prison were their voices drowned out, smothered by the angry water that surrounded Azkaban. Nature seemed to feed off the wizard-made island; the ocean groaned and clouds permanently darkened the sky, threatening to strike them all down at any given time. But even this scene was not privy to her. The small sliver of a window stood opposite of her confinement, just out of reach and tauntingly promising a freedom she could not have. Day and night she stared through this gap, unable to tear herself away from the past, as the screams of prisoners confused themselves with those entirely in her head.

The faces of her sisters swam before her eyes, frozen in shrieks of terror as they were struck down. Andromeda was always first, her hand outstretched as she attempted to fight for her freedom, but a jet of green light struck her chest like an arrow. Always true to its mark each time she saw the scene. Defiant, as she had always been, but the stubbornness was not unknown to the Black girls. Despite her utter treachery, Bellatrix had always found a way to keep her out of the Dark Lord’s direct line of sight.

Narcissa died last. She laid sprawled out on hard stone flooring, weeping and begging for the life of her child. Slowly, with her arms wrapped around a squirming blonde-haired babe, she would seem to melt into a pool of dark liquid. Her light, nearly white, hair fanned out around her was stained red with blood. A shadowed figure stood over her sinking form, letting out a high cruel laugh before ending her life.

No matter how many times Bellatrix attempted to change their fates, they always left her. And her mind would collapse into darkness, the deaths of her sisters becoming her reality and the only thing she knew to be true. It was her punishment, for the crimes she had committed. Because she had done many things for her Master, unspeakable things, and whatever happiness she had clung to was sucked from her soul. Hollow, broken, but still alive, she’d been half mad by the time her Dark Lord rescued her.

Weeks had passed since then, but the taste of salt lingered on her tongue. The others, the ones who had escaped her fate, didn’t understand the agony she had endured. How could they? Cowardice ruled their lives as they all fled into hiding the moment their Master had fallen. No one searched for him, no one except her and two others. And their attempts had been all for naught. No information was retrieved from the torture of Frank and Alice Longbottom, nothing but assurance that Bellatrix was His most loyal servant. In the end they had all been sent away, to rot in cells until their bodies withered into corpses.

Her mind had been lost. Her power became unpredictable, yet as strong as ever. She blamed those that had put her in chains for the misery she had suffered and it was revenge that fueled her. Nothing would satisfy her more than to see her enemies parish in the flames she created and ever since her freedom she had strived to be at His side, aiding him, as she had done before. But the broken fragments of a once strong woman shuddered at his fury, trembled under his glare, and strove earnestly to please him once more. Let me find the boy. She had said, heart fluttering with a long forgotten sensation. But he had shot her down. Admirable as her devotion was, the boy was his. Everything was his. But today, things were changing.

An owl had arrived, a strange method of communication from the Dark Lord, but it was a private summoning. The Mark was used solely to command the presence of all, but tonight he only wanted her. Jittery with anticipation, she waited for the time she was allowed to come. It had been too long since their last private meeting. Nearly fourteen years had passed since she had last stood in his presence alone. Back then she had been so bold, a soldier who was both loyal and ambitious. Tonight, she would prove to be just the same.

When the clock struck eleven, she apparated out of the Malfoy manor unnoticed and arrived outside the safe house. It appeared, from the outside, to be a run down shack with nothing more to it than a tattered, dirty curtain that fluttered in a broken window. Weeds cluttered the front yard, tangling together with sharp thorns, and tainting the air with a putrid smell. Stepping forward, she tapped her wand on the right side of a wrought iron gate before creaking it open and slipping past silently.

The inside of the shack was much larger and cleaner than the outside, but nearly as dark. There was no light, save for a low golden glow coming from the end of a long hallway. It cut through the blackness like a knife and guided her way to where she knew the Dark Lord would be waiting for her. The scent of mildew carpet overpowering her senses, she placed a hand against the cracked door, and pushed it open, announcing her arrival.

“Bellatrix.” His voice was low, barely audible over the crackling and snapping of burning wood. He had his black turned to her, his pale hands clasped behind him like a man deep in thought. “I have some news for you---"

“My Lord!” Bellatrix gasped, breathless with the honor of standing before him. Her body shrank in the company of his, head bowed in respect, a tangle of wild black hair curtained her gaze for only a moment. She longed to look at him, to be seen by him. Slowly, but insistently, she moved closer. “What is it my Lord?”

Gazing into the fire, the strange features of Lord Voldemort were illuminated in an unearthly glow. His sharp cheek bones casted shadows over his face and his red eyes were sunk deep into his skull, like two beacons shining out of the depths of a cavern. It was unnerving, yet mesmerizing and the woman found herself transfixed, waiting for him to tell her why he had summoned her. Why her? What grand plan did he have for the one who had been sent away for him? But the task at hand was not a gift to his soldier, but a test. It had not been lost on him that the woman who had been returned to him was not the same. And there could be no risking that Azkaban had softened her, instead of strengthening her.

“It seems---young Harry has a fond attachment for your cousin, Sirius Black.” His raspy voice filled the room with little effort, his eyes trained on the flames that licked flesh from wood. His servant hissed at the name of her kin and took a small step back. “Now, now, Bellatrix.” Voldemort turned, his gaze resting on her gaunt face. Her hollow eyes were momentarily alight with temptation and he lifted a hand to cup her chin. “I have given our slippery friend, Lucius, a mission--- and I wish you to accompany him.”

Her slender fingers twitched, her body coiling away from his cold touch. “You should not trust him, my Lord. He is not trustworthy. Malfoy is weak!” Bellatrix spat. “He is not strong enough to carry out your missions. You should have let me do this.” She was the most loyal, she had done everything to find him, and her efforts were repaid with exclusion. How dare Lucius or Severus think they were the most favored, the most devout of them all. How dare they think themselves worthy! After all those years, they had spent in their cozy lives, forgetting who they were and letting the world forget who they had served.

Ignoring her outburst, the Dark Lord continued. “I’m going to lure the boy to the Department of Mysteries, so that we may retrieve the prophecy at long last. He will think Sirius is there, captured by me, tortured by me. This will bring him. But it will also bring Sirius, no doubt.” He paused, taking in the expression on his loyal servant’s face, drinking in the flickering of emotions hidden behind her lidded eyes. “You must rid the boy of him.”

It took only a moment for Bellatrix to understand what she was being instructed to do. It would not be her job to get the prophecy or even capture the boy, instead it would be to kill Sirius Black. “Of course, My Lord.” Her voice did not tremble or fault in any way to betray the sliver of hesitance she felt. The Black family name would die with Sirius and they would fade away, like other great houses had done. No more would they command the respect of others or insight fear, but instead dwindle away like a withering flower. Once dead, there would be no use to recollect on it and no chance of revival.

“That is all.”

The Dark Lord turned away from her and Bellatrix retreated into the shadows, the face of young Sirius dancing in her mind. Such a bright, vivacious boy he had been. What a shame…what a shame, she thought miserably. But she could not fail. It was clear to her, now, that this was not a mission she could turn away from. There would be no more shielding her family from the wrath of the Dark Lord.