#im so unwell about them god

[blakbonnet]

on why am I crying today

[ibeewashere]

I genuinely cannot describe how deeply DEVASTATED I am about riz being the only one who can take stress tokens for the others. Yes fig is a protector and will fight endlessly for her friends and I love that about her but there is something about the way riz loves his friends. It’s a more subtle kind of love, but just as relentless and passionate and he will take any burden for the people he cares about and bear the weight of it on his shoulders so they don’t have to deal with it without any hesitation. I am ILL.

[skitskatdacat63]

Pictures from the 2023 Brazil Post-Race that made me psychologically and physcially and emotionally unwell:

[p4nishers]

thinking about the relationship between mightily oats' "the worthwhile [words] don't burn" and constable dorfl's "the words in the heart cannot be taken"

[starringvincentprice]

fletcher honorama by sparks

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

do you ever just sit there thinking about your favorite ocs while violently shaking. god. clenches fist. They're So.

[b4kuch1n]

fuck it sk8 sketches from da sketchbook. get sk8ed idiot

[epicfirestormer]

Me after seeing the Ashoka teaser:

[enhanced-operatives-division]

Junicrane/Starstruck Ramble

I will not be brief, all under the cut

To clear some things right off the bat:

No corpse, no proof with Juniper. Obligatory this is set in a canon where he's alive and adjacent to the agency in some way.

Reggie & Juniper are just gay to me, but I don't mind any interpretation of their sexuality

The games are set in 1967/68 to me (based on a couple bits in game) which is before it was legal to be gay in America at least (1971), which is relevant to how I interpret canon as being somewhat grounded in reality, despite unrealistic elements.

This is just an insane amount of headcanons/elements of and AU all culminated into one post. I will talk about some headcanons like they're just facts because they are established in my head, and it saves me over explaining literally everything, however I will explain some parts a little bit for clarity.

Alright. Actual beginning of the ramble:

Juniper is a character to me who had gotten so lost in his job as an actor and a social presence that in the end his whole life revolved around that 'role'. Because of this, by the time he's put into the situation where he's around the Agency, he basically knows nothing about himself, though he doesn't realise at first. Furthermore, what little identity he had has changed in so many ways. He's no longer a beloved famous actor in the prominence of public light, he's legally dead and he tarnished his career just before he was supposed to die, with the bonus of that making him lose the majority of his estate. From that, he also has horrific facial scarring from the electrical burns from literally having his face fried. I believe a friend of mine made a post about this a while ago (I also think they were the first to think it up also), but, to me, Juniper has a permanent trimmer in his right arm (aka his dominant hand) from the electrical current and it is messing with his nervous system.

All in all, he's not doing great, but he's too proud to admit that he's not doing great, because if anything, what's left of his ego is all he has as a defense since he's deep in unfamiliar water.

Before ending up around the agency (I have multiple interpretations of this, so I'm just going to bring it up generally), he'd never actually seen Reggie, and his only impression of him is a single voicemail, which was his only reference he had to later impersonate him. Juniper probably has very little feelings other than the ones he projects onto him because of Phoenix and that, at the very least, he's physically attracted to Reggie to some degree (that's like the beginning of how everything else would tumble into place in this sort of interpretation at least).

And on Crane's side? His feelings towards Juniper are probably very intense and muddled. On the one hand, he adores musical theatre, and that's his now ex-favourite actor. The thought of just casually being around him blows the bit of fanboy in him away at first because THAT'S the GUY, plus the inklings of a celebrity crush which still poke at him. And then there's the rational side of him, which knows Juniper has committed absolute atrocities on the side of Zoraxis, and hates him for that. Then there's how much Juniper comes off as an asshole at first because he refuses to cooperate with anything the Agency tried to put in place. He finds Juniper endlessly frustrating, and yet he's stuck working with him since, afterall, he's the one who knows the Agency's history with Juniper the best. I imagine him acting a lot like how he does IEYTD 1 around Juniper.

At this point, I'm just describing the pitch for a romcom.

I think the start of their relationship with one another largely started with Juniper trying to wind Crane up. It was a way of getting his attention, and I don't think Juniper knows why he's so dead set on that at first, because I don't think he realises he has a crush on 'this grump' at first. (I think that's actually the fun part about these two, because it's almost like a role reversal of the celebrity crush dynamic. This ex-big name actor has a TERRIBLE crush on an average joe and it is KILLING HIM.) But of course the Agency keeps them together because Juniper is at least conversing with Crane, so it's a start.

Through one way or another, they actually get talking casually, at least mildly at first. It takes Juniper a long time to fully deconstruct the wall he's built, and the thing is, Crane isn't the one trying to deconstruct it, at least at first, because yeah, Juniper realises if he wants Reggie to actually like him in any way, he can't keep winding him up. So they talk. Small talk at first, something rhythmic and almost easy to keep to a script. And over time that turns into actual conversations. Genuine ones in which Reggie rips out the occasional one of his jokes which Juniper is endlessly endeared about. The way he smiles just before he makes them, like he wants to chuckle at what he's about to say before he says it. That's probably when Juniper realised that he does have some vague crush on him, and that it wasn't going away.

This is what kickstarts John I can't-buy-you-things-to-impress-you-so-acts-of-service-it-is Juniper to do little things for him. It mostly starts off as him trying to make Reggie his tea how he likes it. However, the nerve damage in his arm makes that hard, as the weight of the kettle and trying to pour is hard all of a sudden. And he refuses to accept that, so he tries for a very long while. Long enough that Crane would go to investigate what was going on. And when he does see Juniper leaning over a cup with the kettle as he uneasily tries to pour it, and when Crane asks Juniper responds so matter-of-fact that his intention is nothing but genuine. And it catches Reggie off guard because Juniper hadn't done anything like that up to that point, and his very apparent vulnerability is so clearly on show.

It shifts something between them.

From that point on, conversations are longer, more familiar. Both of their attitudes soften, and Reggie makes more jokes. Juniper learns how to better use his left hand while strengthening his right back to a point where it could be used again. Slowly, they're both spending time with one another not because they have to, but just because they can. Little bits at first, not too far outside what they already were doing, but those little bits turned into long bits to a point where the other person's company was genuinely desirable.

As time passes, Juniper probably realises that he doesn't genuinely know much about himself or what hobbies he's into, because he never really had the time when he got big, and his home life in his youth wasn't bad, but it wasn't picturesque. I think Reggie would pick up on it, and absolutely try to introduce him to some things he's into. Some things stick, other things don't (corn husking very much stays Reggie's passion, and John will go with him sometimes because it's him, but it's not something he strongly cares for). Crane introduces him to a lot of music, and it's something that becomes a staple between them, with tracks they listen to more than others (tragically, I know relatively little about 60s music so I couldn't really say what). Occasionally they dance, never anything intense, think slow dancing, but the closeness is nice.

Through all of it, Juniper is battling the worst crush of his life, and he can't stand it, because I think he struggles to read people since he doesn't have anything like a script or a director to refer back to, so he has no idea if Reggie likes him back or if he's just desperate for that to be true. I think because of that any sort of confession between them would be incredibly raw, not only because of the time they live in making it hard for them to be truthful about how they love, but because it's a complete show of Juniper who's worked to be this better person. I don't exactly know how that would go, mainly because I don't have one set version of their dynamic, this post is just a generalisation of main consistent points.

Reggie does like him back, because he's gotten used to Juniper being just this guy, not a figure in the public eye, not a Zoraxis lackey, and not any sort of Agency operative (despite being under their care to some degree). He's someone he genuinely cares for, because they've given one another the time of day to learn one another, and I think because Reggie was a field agent, he was a lot better at reading Juniper than Juniper was at reading him. Eventually Juniper's company becomes something he could see around him for the rest of his life, and I think he accepts that he likes Juniper a lot more gracefully.

I think any affection directed at Juniper would at first be met with him feeling a little muddled. Reggie was a very physically affectionate person when he could be, and sure the initial flirting with one another came with the occasional little touches, but everything now was so deeply intentional. I also don't think Juniper would almost ever get over the novelty of being able to kiss him, or many other gestures, because it made the fact that they were together so very real, and it was great. I do think it comes easier to Reggie, and it's a big way of showing how much he cares, so it's important for Juniper to try and show it back because he knows how much it means to the other.

I like the idea of them eventually living with one another, too. I think Juniper would have always had a quiet little daydream of sorts where he does just live a domestic quiet life, and he can with Reggie (well, as close as they can get between the Agency and Zoraxis always being at odds), and he loves that, and he loves him, and it's immense.

I think they cook for one another a lot, it helps Juniper work on his dexterity in a controlled environment, which means a lot because it's a huge point of insecurity (that and his scars). He does improve, and Crane is proud of that and shows it and it's great. I also think they'd probably cook together too, because they can deal with being in the kitchen together and they work well with one another. It's probably a good way for them to unwind because over time they can do it in relative silence.

As I said before, I also think music is a staple in their household, and that Reggie listens to things on vinyl almost all of the time because he likes the background noise. Sometimes Juniper will catch him chuntering along to the music which he finds endlessly endearing. I wouldn't put it past his dramatic ass to also join in to fluster Reggie, but I also don't think Reggie would mind that terribly because Juniper has listened to the music enough to know the lyrics, and that's huge to him.

I don't think they are without rough patches, no relationship is, but I think the good part about them is that they're willing to talk about it (... eventually). They're used to long conversations, and while they're often less fun conversations, they're needed and they know that, and it works out.

Alright. I think I'm done for now. I haven't mentioned everything, but this definitely got the worst of it out of my system. If you ever want to hear any specific thoughts my ask box is open but other than that, behold my general dynamic for these two which has been festering in my head for years. I think they're great

[terracyte]

when. when old fashion pet name. when whenw ehwnewhewn 🧎‍♂️🧎‍♂️🧎‍♂️

[loud-whistling-yes]

This is going to sound like the world's most brain-rotted thought but passerine by the oh hellos is martlet coded and canary in a coal mine by the crane wives is clover coded

[tsukana]

“we could’ve been us.”. crowley dragging aziraphale in for the kiss of their existences and holding them there refusing to let him go and refusing to leave for this brief moment because he knows this is likely going to be the last time anything. because he can fool himself and others and a lot of things, but he refuses to lie to anyone about this. send post.

[icharchivist]

New event Preview featuring Hisoka!

It seems to be the preview for Winter 10th play, with a tagline of "a piece of magic added to cocktails", making Hisoka Guy's colead!

[skitskatdacat63]

2009 Japanese Grand Prix - Sebastian Vettel

[guts-and-gloryy]

animal cannibal (from the short film Possibly In Michigan) makes me think about them sometimes

[orbdotexe]

They’ve been like this for a while now. The Guardian gets hurt, Ghost scolds them, and they feel guilty for burdening him; for dragging him down with them, and being why he can never go home. They won’t listen when he says they’re his home.

bonk bonk bonk. this is my apology for taking so long on... literally everything else. The Cayde short is actually done now, but wasn't at the time of me finishing this one (which has been done for a few days, I'm just. too lazy lmao) so someone bully me into posting Cayde Hug please

Anyway here is a nice Young Wolf and Ghost short! angst with a side of some beloved bickering <3 they are so stubborn but they are soulmates (platonic), your honor.

[ao3 link]

The statues, twice their size, are caught in poses of combat-ready or investigative, some having tried to run farther down the hall. The blizzard swells and dies out farther down the corridor, leaving the blanket of wisp-soft Void swirling around their steps as mist continues bleeding through the cracks in what was once a battalion of Cabal.

Their arm sways at their side, cold blood squeezing out of shrapnel wounds down the side of their body, the other hand tightly gripping Howl. Ghost materializes to their left, but they stumble forward, stepping towards the frosted over parts of their helmet. There’s a shard of a frag launch splitting down through the eye of it; the orange glow dead. 

They plant the tip of the sword on the ground to hold steady as they lower themself over their helmet, Ghost trilling worriedly behind them. The streams of blood begin to reheat, numbness leaving the limb in favor of a boiling pain, and they can feel the soothing chill of Ghost scanning their injuries. 

Shakily setting Howl down beside them, they move to pick up the tattered helmet, to be met with an irritated strumming through the Bond. “Guardian, at least hold still long enough for me to heal that arm before you make the bleeding worse,” Ghost sighs out. The Guardian only grumbles, before holding the arm out for a proper scan.

The movement itself makes them tense, resisting the urge to screw their eyes shut against the pins and needles and the accidental twisting of metal scraps still in some wounds. They hiss at the cold air, partially regretting the choice of Void as they all but pour heat out through the shredded armor and skin.

They trace the broken edges of their helmet with their spare hand, rather than watch Ghost knit the skin back together. The feeling of the metal shards being pushed out from the inside as the torn muscle pulls back together makes them nauseous. 

No matter how many times they’ve felt it, or woken up from a death to their insides still being patched together, or had to pull themself off of spikes for it to even happen—The nausea always comes back. The frustration of never getting used to something so common in their non-life always comes back.

“Guardian.” Their fingers are bleeding, cut on the broken metal. The edges of their vision swims in and out, and they're not sure if it’s blood loss or the hallucinations again. “Guardian? You’re doing it again.”

They blink, and lower the outstretched arm. The burning feels distant, and the skin is stiff with dried blood, but the wounds feel closed, and the repaired parts of their armor are thinner than the parts that hadn’t been damaged.

He sighs, more irritated—exhausted?—this time. “We’ll need to see Drifter again if we want to repair your armor properly. There’s only so much I can do.” It feels as if he’s scanning them, but the blue glow never comes. “Still with me?”

As a soothing pulse pushes through stiff barriers of Light, they feel some sense return to their body and their face soften. Turning their head away from Ghost, the Guardian gives a small nod. A part of them wants to cradle him; say they’re sorry for putting him through this. He should’ve had someone better. 

They settle instead for a soft rippling in the Light; the feeling of tucking a sleeping other’s hair away. He knows what they mean.

Ghost shoves his shell into the side of their head, making them lose the thought and duck away. “We’re not doing this again, Guardian! If the Traveler itself gave me a chance to pick someone else, you know I’d refuse every time.” His voice softens as he speaks, and he must have seen the small wince that crosses their face.

“I mean it, Guardian,” he chimes, firm but soft. Wholly faithful. “When I told you, through Light or Dark, I meant it. Even if it’s just you and me against the world, I wouldn’t change a thing so long as I had you.” 

They know Ghost means it; they’ve never doubted it—But that’s the problem. He deserves so much better than a monster for a partner. The crumbling, now barely recognizable statues of Stasis prove them, if not a monster, a force of chaos. Both unstoppable, and immovable. Even with the explosives and traps, there was never a chance. 

The shared turmoil strains the Bond with impressions of spirals, and Ghost lowers himself to hover just over their shoulder as they hold their other hand up for him. “Monster or not—and I’m not saying you are, but you never believe me—” He rambles, “You’re still my partner. My Guardian.” 

And he’s their Ghost. But it changes nothing. The blood is half dried, dripping sluggishly, as he closes the cuts in the pads of their fingers. They rub them together, the nerves still knitting together feeling like pins and needles. 

Nudging him with their shoulder draws a huff out of Ghost. “Yes, I’m done. But this conversation isn’t over.”

It’s their turn to sulk—The conversation is never over. Who’s the monster, who’s to blame, who should suffer: Ghost’s answer is always the same—They scoop the parts of their helmet up, moving it to one arm, before sheathing Howl on their back. 

They could clean it later. Ghost gives a puff of discontent.

As they stand, the sound of the last remnants of Stasis crackling out of existence drags their eyes up. The remaining wisps of Void smoke are quickly phasing out of the air, and they take a moment to watch the last evidence of their destruction crumble into nothing. Only the damage of weaponry to the building and their spilt blood remain.

“I’d say that’s progress, wouldn’t you?” Ghost murmurs, tone light, and they can’t help but give him a weird look. This quiet destruction– progress? They get a puff of indignity in exchange. “Well, I did get the data Drifter needed, so yes– But not what I’m talking about.” 

The look he gives them is… cheeky. They don’t like it. “What I meant was…” There’s an audible smile creeping into his voice—victoriously smug—as he bumps their head. “Youuu didn’t fight me on healing this time.”

Scars. He’s smug about the scars. 

They give a thin-lipped grimace at his priorities, and he just beams brighter. “It’s not much, but you don’t make personal progress very easy, Guardian.” They huff and turn away from him, walking down the hall to the back exit. 

Ghost rests his shell in the junction of their hood as they pull it back up, both of them knowing the Guardian will walk slower so he won’t fall out.

“I’ll take any win I can get with you,” he chimes to himself, quiet.