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#im still interested in finding rare pics to share on here
fallenvampyra · 5 months
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omg it’s been a while uh
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25 [M4F] #Norway/Anywhere. Soft Christian looking for life-partner.
I know the title is a little serious, but I want to be clear with what my goal for posting here is. Its to never having to post again. That being said, Im not expecting to jump into anything right away but to start out chatting and see if we match/there is a connection yada yada. :)
So that cleared up heres me:
Im a 25yo Norwegian with lots of love but sadly no-one to give it to. (Yet.) Simply put Im looking for someone to click with who shares my love for a more femdom/ and or RR leaning relationship, who also happens to be a Christian and believes in God. I know its a rare combination, and especially here but being an outlier I guess Im simply just looking for another? One other thing is, Im looking for someone who like me doesnt drink/do drugs. Its just something Ive never been a fan of/comfortable with. Looking for monogamous and long term obviously.
As for me Im a person who connects with few, but connects deep with those he do. Loyal and honest, in offer of support and Ill hear your rants. However I will tell you my actual thoughts on the dress. :D Im probably the more soft and cuddly type who takes life easy. Im tall and average but that doesnt matter much once u get me flustered. I dress pretty standard for a guy but Im a sucker for anything cute, light colors and pastel when looking at stuff. Quirky introvert and a lil bit of a nerd, books, video games, fantasy and all that. But I also like to play sports and be if not super at least somewhat active. A not is that with the exception of the Role reversal I do have fairly traditional Christian values and would much prefer the same.
Also Id be happy to send pic and verify once you hit me up, and hopefully you are too, as though chemistry is a big part, physical attraction still is a factor. Would prefer someone not obese thou, as I wan be able to be if not hyperactive, do some physical stuff with her, but beside that anything goes as long as we find each other attractive. Dark and politically edgy humor is part of the package too btw, though I know to hold back. Prefer messages and would be great if you gave a little bit of an introduction.
As for who Im looking for its hard to tell who you click and have chemistry with but someone with common values and interests is a good start and everything else is just bonus. But someone whos decisive and knows how to take a lil charge wouldn't hurt. Or someone who loves cuddles. Im fan of the sappy stuff. :) And yes Im probably a little bit kinky too, but I dont want that to be what determines a relationship.
Now Id love to hear some about you!
Dealbreakers:
As mentioned I dont drink or do drugs Im and looking for someone who isnt either. (My weird lil deal breaker.)
As for long term and settling Im bound to my nations borders thou per my situation now, but as for visiting theres more flexibility. :)
Anyway a lil unsure what to write in this one but if you've made it so far, and youre not scared of yet and youd think we could hit it off then what u waiting for, send me a message, so we can get to know each other! Even if u dont fit all of this, which you prolly shouldnt as love shouldn't be a list then dont be scared to hmu. Unless its a deal breaker kinda thing obv. :) Cant wait to hear from ya!
Remember I dont bite I cuddle. :)
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tricksterreformed-a · 4 years
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✩  INTERVIEW WITH THE MUN  ✩
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➊ How many ships do you have on this blog?
          I don’t know, let’s count! I’ve been writing some super fun GabrielxBobby stuff with @multimuse-rp, and that good (complicated) GabrielxDean shit with @awaywardboy-andhisangel and actually... that’s all the canonxcanon ship stuff I’m writing right now for some reason. But that’s not all the ships!  Fulfilling a years long dream (for me) @daedaluscried and I are writing GabrielxAri and she has also indulged some excellet (unrequited) GabrielxEve content, @thxwxlf and I have dabbled in some GabrielxKekipi, and @inferniangod has been kind enough to write GabrielxIfrit with me. 
          I’ve discussed, but not actually written GabrielxSam with @smmie, and I think @hellsmother and I are on track to write some GabrielxRowena (but if I’m not sure I should probably check, whoops).  So that’s six total, eight if you count these last two.  Plus a handful of others where Gabriel is just flirting at people and waiting to see what happens.  Nothing has to happen, he’s just like that.  But something could happen with any of them.
➋ Have you ever roleplayed with someone that just left an unforgettable impression on you?
          Of course!  I’ve been doing this for 10+ years and people have made all kinds of impressions, some amazingly good and others downright awful. I can roll through some nicknames/first names only and proably only Anti will know who I’m talking about because a lot of them are from our shared history on gaiaonline!  I could go on and on about every single one of these people but here’s a quick ‘n dirty list instead: Noir, Kathy, Mariah, Moose, Lyss, Berry, and @daedaluscried!  I’m still occasionally in touch with three of these people (one more often than the other two) which I think is kind of wild all things considered. There’s also some not so good impressions, like guy-who-started-nice-and-then-harassed-me-for-nude-pics and the-person-who-broke-my-trust-and-caused-me-to-stop-writing-smut, but i have put them far far behind me.
➌ Which of your ships on this blog is the fluffiest?
          The fluffiest is probaly Gabriel and Ari now that we’ve gotten into the emotional core of the relationship on both ends.  Which isn’t to say that it’s not a spicy ship with a helping of angst, but... I’ve written more hand-holding with them than with any of the others and I guess that’s my definition of fluff. Also I suspect the gratuitous hand-holding will continue even once they’re past the language barrier. So... FLUFF.
➍ Would you say you’re a decent role player or do you have any self doubts?
          I think I’m a decent writer but my roleplay skills vary depending on the day.  I understand how to set a mood and (usually) how to string a decent sentence together but sometimes the craft that goes into bouncing off of another writer and giving them something to bounce off of in return eludes me.
➎ Have you made lots of friends on this blog?
          More than I expected too. But when I set this blog up I thought ‘those days are behind me now’ so... one would be more than I expected.
➏ What’s the one thing you especially love about roleplaying your muse?
          WRITING THE JOKES!  And not just the verbal jokes he makes, I love writing jokes into my narration! Meta jokes! Dick jokes! Bad puns! All of it! I love it!! I also enjoy the way Gabriel interacts with the world around him.  He rarely just stands in a scene and talks, he’s always moving and gesturing and doing stuff. I also love writing his dialogue, even when the things I write make me squinch my face up with shame. He just says stuff sometimes. 
➐ Are there any people you’ve been to afraid of approaching?
          NOPE!  I’m not afraid to reach out. Approaching people is the easy part. You send a meme, you make an ooc comment, you tag them in something, you hit them with an ask or an IM or whatever.  And if they don’t answer that’s a-okay!  Their choice, I’m not hurt or personally offended. What I’m afraid of is what happens after that part if they do answer.  I can usually BS a thread until I find the point of the thing but IMs and asks? Y I K E S ! Now there’s an expectation for me to be cool and witty and have good ideas instead of just mediocre ones. Very scary. The reason I don’t send IMs.
➑ Give us a rough estimate: How much time have you spent on your graphics? (icons, theme, banners, promos, etc)
          My icons/graphics are a visual representation of me learning to use G.I.M.P. and I think you can... very clearly see the learning curve.  More effort went into those old fuzzy icons I have than the new, crisp ones. Plus moodboards and other stuff?   My guess is 40+ hours.
➒ Got any memorable threads on here? Care to mention a few?
          Well now I wish I had thread tags.  Thread tags would be a lifesaver right now.  Anyway, I am once again shouting out @awaywardboy-andhisangel and our original GabexDean thread that has since spiraled and gotten very, very interesting (it’s not over, I just like it).  And @divinitatemxsanguis who has allowed me to indulge in writing Gabriel with Loki post all the betrayl and murder. They have a special place in my heart so thanks for not judging me! I’m getting ready to write the conclusion/endcap to a sad thread with @isclcphobics involving Talia, Gabriel, and a grave. Plus the thread with @downwillow where Gabriel is human and Micheal has forgotten him. And a shoutout to @daedaluscried for our thread series that I have affectionately dubbed the ‘The Nanny’ series ft. October and Gabriel.  Every thread has been a delight.
          I also have some stuff I’m really looking forward to getting into, specifically with @hellsmother​, @cursebcund​, and @magaprima​.
➓ What were some of the most frustrating moments you had with your muse’s interaction with another muse?
          One that’s on me: sometimes I know that a moment in a thread calls for some emotional vunerability, and often when those times roll around the Gabriel voice I use to write dialogue goes all quiet and resistant and just wants to make jokes.  And either one of two things happens, either I write the joke and cringe because I know now the thread is going to go way off track because obviously the other character won’t be thrilled/is about to shut down and shut up. Or I force some emotional vunerability out of him and it never quite sounds right to me.  Sometimes it’s natural, but sometimes he just won’t do the thing and it frustrates me!
          One that I’ve encountered from someone else: sometimes people will try to force a certain motivation or trait on my Gabriel based on their perception of canon/a past interaction they’ve had with another Gabe as portrayed by another RPer. This really grinds my gears because if you want a Gabriel with that motivation to critique/praise/fight with then go find one! I garantee someone out there plays him that way! There are a lot of us out here doing this! I’m not going to change my portrayl for you!!
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The opposite of your last post for the ask meme! Like 1, 5, 9..
thank you lol sorry it took me a minute to get to posting these answers......i also skipped a couple that got asked previously via answering all primes lol
1: What inspires you?
hm well just basic stuff like “being in a good mood” lol or “being hyped up by friends” or “having reason to be particularly excited about something” which is all like, factors that Contribute Energy......learning about stuff / trying something and discovering like oh i’m Into this thing, or that for whatever reason something turns out to be more within reach / doable than i might’ve thought, like, hey i wanna get on this maybe.......~creatively~ it’s great to like, see other ppl’s art, and while i’ve sure been Inspired by professional artists, overall i’m more like, influenced and motivated by seeing the styles / specific works of Online Randos like me.......i also Draw to create [self-indulgent (usually fairly) niche fanart which is also probably gay and is all the time of characters i like] so like, the Stuff I Wanna Make Fanart Of (which has Whatever characters i specifically would like to draw lol) is sure directly Inspiring in that way. i’d say i never had that experience of like, ppl being kids and seeing some [distributed work in a certain art medium] like oh i want to make my own [distributed work in a certain art medium] as in like, i wanna publish a book, i wanna make movies, etc, but i guess i Did b/c i was like elementary school age in the early-to-mid 00s and experienced some instances of online fanart like :o :o wow damn ppl can do that?? just be a rando drawing fanart and sharing it w/ other people online???? and today i am living that dream, so good for me lol. and also i’d like to shoutout marge simpson anime, which is a particular piece of Online Art (technically fanart even lol) which was like, unusually Motivating as a single work of art lol, i made a notes app fanart like immediately and then a way more “painterly” piece of fanart that was v directly inspired by it lol.......and i was sure Drawing It Up last last winter when bmc 3.0 was impending / happening, b/c i got into like Just in the dec before, so that was Fresh, and then bam the Content is happening concurrently and as soon as we even just learned that jeremy has glasses i immediately spent like honestly 25 consecutive hours making fanart for that exact Inspiration. we didn’t even know abt the hello kitty shoes yet!!! and naturally im not out here for stats or clout but it is Inspiring when ppl enjoy the stuff i make and let me know one way or another. [tag comments that express enthusiasm in any way.....Appreciated]
9: Do you trust people easily, or do people have to earn your trust?
i have to say i am wary! that’s in part just like, a default anxiety defensive mode lol. but it takes me a hot minute (aka weeks....or months.....) to realize when someone like, would like to be friends or something, so while i can be Friendly and Outgoing w/ people like, immediately, i’m not picking up relationships left and right that are close enough that i’d particularly talk about “trust” or whatever. i’m not necessarily Distrustful either lol, it’s more just like, again re: the constant wariness thing. it is not unlike a cat lmao i vibe with them lol i Get that [approach]....and there’s been times i’ve been like “hmm i sure do Not vibe with this person ever and am not comfortable around them / interacting with them to any extent beyond occasional casual interactions that i don’t super enjoy. that’s me being overly anxious and failing to be personable i guess!!” and then that person Does give that reason down the line like oh, actually, that eternal uneasiness was warranted :/ damb
21: How does someone become friends with you?
yknow i was like “didn’t i Also answer this one previously” but it turned out the question i was thinking of, which i Had answered, was “how does someone become important to you” lmao.....same diff
tbh it’s kind of an arduous process lmao like. first of all i am Bad about initiating shit, and a lot of times will like, be wary of Directly Interacting with people for a while b/c i am also Bad At not being too passive / unwilling to assert anything so like, if someone’s regularly interacting with me but i’m not into it / Eventually Realize i’m not into it, it’s that thing again where my main strat is [v gradually sidle away] lol and just find it difficult to extricate myself from interactions / relationships and so that plays into me really feeling like i have to have some real confidence that i’d get on with / vibe with someone Before i start significantly interacting with / getting involved with them which....is also difficult natch lol like. can’t rly get a great feel for what someone’s like w/o talking to them.......but then if i Distance myself at all at any point will that be taken as rejection or whatever.......and then anyways say i Am talking to someone, then it’s like, also i’m just not fantastic at casual conversation always and that stage where you don’t know someone too well and talking is mostly a Polite Ritual and it’s like oh god don’t mess up, respond Normally lmaoo......i am nervous. and i also have a tendency to just naturally try to make an interaction go smoothly than immediately prioritize / feel comfortable busting out My Personality lmao.....so then even if ppl are responding well enough it’s like ah jeez i know we’re all performing always but have i shown them What I’m Actually Like to any significant degree, am i just masking it up / mirroring the crap out of how they talk?? and also it then takes me quite a while to put together “if someone keeps talking to you / choosing to interact with you for like, weeks, it probably means they want to / are interested in doing so” lol.........and then i’ll take ages more of trying to consciously Be More Myself without *also* feeling like this is too much of an act lol, and gradually picking up like oh they’re still not like, annoyed or disinterested or something..............what i am trying to say is it sure takes a minute lol
also when i Am attempting sometimes to like [initiate interaction] with people my version of being Active is still not all that active lmao i will be like [occasional Like] or [even more occasional reply] or [tag comments or no comments coz it’s twitter and im rt-ing stuff] and it’s like oh wow if we’re not having more regular interaction i suppose i’ve failed or something?? does this mean anything further lol, did i do anything.....but welp gotta have that perspective that Not Necessarily lol and i’m not the only person in the world who might not make friends or even friendly acquaintances easily / at the drop of a hat and u can’t necessarily read way into shit that hasn’t Actually been communicated to you.......naturally though it is easier to have some ~perspective~ and Serenity about all this sort of thing when you do already have some Friends lmao........been feeling (and consciously nudging myself towards feeling) More Chill about say like, friendly acquaintances i have who aren’t raring to interact with me on the reg.......ppl i’ll go months or half a year or more between having a convo with and then we’ll be like trading dm’s for a couple days and then it’s back to not really talking, and that Is What It Is, not necessarily a tragedy, and really it feels “rude” to acknowledge to myself like oh i’m not sure that me and whomever even Vibe well enough that *i’d* be raring to talk all the time either, but hey, it’s also true, i don’t have to be Validated by ppl who know me having me in their friend circles in any significant way......i be out here on the peripheral / outer orbits and i can appreciate that for what it is, even if, again, easier to be more Cool with that when i’m not Only in ppl’s periphery...........i appreciate the pal i have who like, 99% of how we Communicate is occasionally sending each other pics of our cats, not very intimate but also back when i was offline for months on end they eventually went out of their way to find someone to get in touch with to verify i hadn’t like died or anything lol........i appreciate the Gestures of Caring that ppl have and do extend, even if we do not actually talk regularly. 
and like also i’m bad at like. idk the main way i talk is again, At Some Length and often about real specific shit lol so im like woop aware that many ppl are not into that, or they might be down for having an exchange like that for a day and then they’re done.........not at all like wholly Against more lol Conversational conversations but i gotta say that’s more of a struggle lmao..........so let’s say befriending me takes some Patience. i kinda operate on [cat] rules. jellicle
25: How do you stop yourself from going back to toxic people?
i absolutely am Refraining from launching off on a ted talk of a tangent that is also me being the [the guy about to throw down a card on the pile on the table and that card pile is like “any conversation” and the guy is labeled “me” and the One Card about to be played is labeled “it’s capitalism” or smthing like that and also it’s all in spanish].jpg.......
anyways idk just try to keep things in perspective, right......i generally am pretty Passive about gradually sidling away from relationships that are bad and so by the time i Have exited them it’s pretty overdue lmao and i get to be quite confident that it was The Right Thing........and just when looking back on stuff it’s like, well if you remember the Good or “Not That Bad(tm)” parts maybe consciously think about the whole of it And specifically the Bad parts / the reasons for peacing out.......also the other day i was mulling over some standard [conflicted / complicated feelings about having cut certain ppl out entirely] and it also occurred to me that a lot of the [conflicted] feeling part came from sympathy for them, whereas from the perspective of Entirely My Own Feelings On The Matter minus that “how do/would they feel about it” consideration, the thought of never interacting w/ these ppl is like. fine with me lol........stuff like this is always Complicated and Individual and there’s certainly no like, one-stop simple Guide To Navigating All This Kind Of Thing, Cmon It’s Easy........another consideration i saw the other day via a graphic on twitter, which is probably most relevant re: say, controlling / abusive Partners, was how like, to think about how someone is acting if they’re saying you should Take Them Back b/c they’ve Changed their behavior, but to pay attention to if they’re trying to guilt you into it / justifying or downplaying their previous behavior / shifting blame and otherwise manifesting the inherently harmful and controlling patterns that are supposed to be gone now........anyways yeah complicated stuff and also just p.s. (and what would’ve been the jumping off point for the It’s-Capitalism tangential essay lol) ppl shouldn’t be blamed if they do choose to let someone back in their life like oh now they’re responsible for bringing their mistreatment upon themself.....no better than blaming someone for, say, having a harmful / controlling romantic partner in the first place like oh well they should’ve known better than to have gotten involved with this person..........ppl are in control of their own abusive behavior and shouldn’t be considered Forces Of Nature no matter how intransigent they are
33: Do you have someone you know you can always rely on?
tbt question 9 lol there’s defo some people that i do trust! love it....
45: Do you consider yourself creative?
another #tbt to question 1 lol.......i mean Yes i am creative in ways but like, who Isn’t, really.......think sometimes “creativity” means “do you like, do Art things” which, yes i do, but then within that there’s art that’s deemed more ~creative~ or w/e......not to mention that i don’t think something has to be definitively labeled an Art to be creative. like, for example, Science and Art aren’t opposites / the antithesis of each other, and anytime defines ~science~ as like, people just memorizing and outputting Facts and Numbers and considers this a distinction from Being An Artist.....wild and i Will fight you lmao. i tell you i can v much remember times i have had to completely disengage to keep from losing my cool at people arguing about “why i respect science but could only be an artist :’|” or “why Art is actually harder than Science and also we’re the underdogs b/c society values science so much more :’|” like.....mf...........anyways scientific pursuits may certainly have a different Methodology (see: scientific method) than art but lbr it still requires creativity and science and art are friends you fucking fools................and then also just zooming in on the Art-Making business here, i also like, have never had any interest in coming up with Original stories / characters and the like, and i don’t enjoy trying and it just really is not my thing, and it’s Funny or something when people wanna say that creative fanworks have value b/c they let ppl cut their teeth for what really matters, inevitably making their own original content(tm)......that isn’t inevitable for me lol and certainly is nothing i aim to do ever, and when there’s the suggestion that if you’re Good enough at ur medium you gotta manifest some of that original the character do not steal shit.........anyways i’m not pressed to claim i am an Artist(tm) or Creative(tm) lol like i guess technically i am both but i have no professional aspirations and my brain does not Do [generate original content] so it’s all like, i’m just out here.........s/o to this time i was trying to do my fuckin thing drawing on a tablet in a cafe and some random annoying guy is trying to talk and i happen to mention like “lol i don’t exactly call myself an artist really” and Guy goes “OH REALLY??? WHAT’S WRONG WITH ARTISTS? WHAT’S YOUR ISSUE WITH ART” like please cool it lmao but god p sure it was a guy who was just. very Around and very annoying in general
49: Do you feel like you’re a good person?
yeah i think i’m alright but really what is the use in like considering there 2 be achievable Good or Bad Person Statuses for everyone........let’s say it’s an ongoing, active state to be in the process of consciously choosing to be Good and working towards Better. especially considering that We Live In A Society which tries to teach everyone and continuously imbues our existence with Bad Messages about how to perceive and engage with other people, and being A Good Person is a lifelong effort and it’s unhelpful to feel that if you’re already Good or well-intentioned enough you can just dust off your hands and be like “well my work here is done” and be unprepared to examine your beliefs/actions or deal with the might-as-well-assume-it’s-an-inevitability that even if u have some noble-ass beliefs you’ll fail to live up to them at some point/s.......so like yeah lol again i feel like i am a pretty good person but can always be better and ought to be aware of / willing to work on that at any point
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deniigi · 6 years
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Hello! Just about to sit down and read your newest fic, so excited about it! I had a question for you (you very well may have answered this already, so sorry in advance!), but do you have advice for writing? Advice in terms of getting start, plotting out stories, helping get the creative juices flowing? I have all these ideas but seem to lack the drive to get things written out. I know the best advice is to just write, but I'm having a horrible time starting. What do you do in those moments?
Hello my dear!
Sorry for taking so long to get back to you. The lord has blessed me with a head cold and ruined all my plans of productivity for the day, so I can finally answer this ask! I’ll talk a little bit about both how to get started with a story and then some little things that help me motivate myself.
I have started a tag for writing advice here: http://deniigi.tumblr.com/tagged/writing-advice
This is going to be a long post, sorry mobile users.
I am going to preface all of this with the understanding that I am technically a professional writer in terms of like, a handful of ways, but I have absolutely zero training in creative writing, so take everything I say with a grain of salt!
So, I personally find that, on the whole, that psychological hurdle of getting started comes a lot from the anticipation of the kind of response a story will get (how many hits, how many comments, how many kudos) in addition to a bit of anxiety or fear over  theloss of sustained interest in that story (by yourself and/or by your audience). I find that this can be alleviated by really, truly internalizing the understanding that you are allowed to write your work however you damn please, for whoever you damn please.
There will be work you write for others, and there will be work you write for yourself. Not all work needs to be published; sometimes, it is really nice to just write shit for yourself; it is a plus for humanity if you decide to share it with others, but you do not have to do that.
Furthermore, I would like to present you with this:
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This is what my current folder for under fire looks like. And you might notice that there are almost always multiple drafts per chapter. Yes, I did in fact rewrite chapter four 5 fucking times, you bet your ass I did. And I’m not ashamed of it. I think the story is better for it. And that’s the important thing here: you do not need to produce a perfect draft the first time around. You will not produce that perfect draft. Accept this. Embrace this. Embrace it and your cat at the same time to really ingrain it as a warm, fuzzy feeling.
Liberate yourself from the pressure of needing to produce the perfect, most right draft and you may find starting the piece overall to be a much easier, more pleasant experience.
And along with this beautiful, uplifting spiritual advice, I also bring a practical thought: when it comes to getting started, a lot of times, people feel like they need to set the stage, yadda yadda yadda. Ha. No. Fuck that.
That’s a surefire way to bore the shit out of yourself. Start right in the middle of a scene that captivates you if that’s what you want to write. It’s a free platform. No one’s gonna arrest you if you stick Spiderman upside down in trash first thing. They might even applaud you actually, because you didn’t make them slog through some of that ‘It was the evening of the 25th and it was cold out in the streets” bullshit we all learned from Dickens.
Alright. Now let’s talk about actually getting started making words appear on paper.
So, from my knowledge there are generally two ways that folks write creatively. You have what I’m going to call the planners and then you what I’m going to call the monsters (I call them this entirely affectionately, I’m sure there’s a better word for these folks, but I don’t have it atm, all I have is a headcold). Planners are folks who sit down and work out their major plot points, who write outlines, and who create the scaffolding of their work before they set out on their magical journey. I think of these folks as architects.
And then you have the monsters and these are those fuckers who just sit down and write stream of consciously like the heathens all our high school teachers tried to teach us not to be.
I am both a planner and a monster. And a lot of that depends on the length of work I’m going for. I have never in my life planned a one-shot, for example. I just attack that as it is. I follow my heart, if you will. But when it comes to longer chaptered fics, I really do think that some outlining is super helpful.
You might find it useful for one-shots, though, I dunno. Maybe give it a try and see what happens?
The two main fics I’ve done proper outlines for are Inimitable and under fire and I actually find outlining to be immensely helpful in psyching me up to write the story (I go through and re-read my outlines when I start to lose interest or diverge too much from the plot outlined there in the actual writing. 9 times out of 10, re-reading gets me stupid excited to write all over again) and it also helps me keep momentum going throughout the plot.
Here’s a pic of some pages of under fire’s outline.
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Physically writing the work is really important for me because it forces me to only put down key points/feelings/ideas I want to include, whereas typing gives me far too much room to get lost/distracted by extraneous detail. And since my handwriting is a teacher’s worst nightmare and I cross out shit and write huge with emotion, I’ll give you a little bit of what the middle page here says:
Miles-
there’s something thrumming
vibrating in his ears wherever he goes
-closes his eyes and somehow enters blackness- emptyness (Stranger Things style)
beat
beat
beat
“help.”
–BACK - everything is gone
closing his eyes doesn’t bring the space back
–it makes him panic. He doesn’t know why. His heart is pounding. He’s sweating He has a horrible feeling of doom.
beat
beat
beat
its gone.
he goes home anxiously. Pretends everything is normal.
his neck crawls
So basically it’s less of a formal outline and more of a collection of stream of consciousness feelings and screenplay directions which I’ll flesh out in the actual story.
Personally, I love writing these kinds of things because they get me pumped for the story I’m about to tell. I get to write out the key scenes and work through all the hard parts first, and then, while I’m writing, I work through the little fun details and banter and I have to write to figure out how we get from one scene to the next and I love the challenge of having to fit those pieces together. I very rarely stick strictly to my outline, (as anyone who is currently reading under fire can tell you right now), but I do try to stick to the main plot points in it and my writing is certainly better for it.
So yes. Outlining is very good, but it is even better when you do it to some kind of music. I listened to What’s Up Danger from the Into the Spiderverse soundtrack on repeat while I wrote this outline to kind of transfer some of the relentless pace conveyed in that song to the piece’s plot.
I highly recommend using music to set the mood of your piece while/before you write a piece of any length. It helps get you in the right headspace (excited or somber or angry) to write. You need emotion to write creatively. You can’t just make that happen sometimes; you need a little help.
A couple other things which might help:
1. Leave your house or the space you’re normally in. Go to a cafe and find a nice corner and have a think and a try in there. Sometimes moving to a different space helps you escape cyclical thinking patterns.
2. Write what you want to read. Don’t bother writing for other peoples’ interests; that’ll just bore the shit out of you all over again.
3. Find an atmospheric mood sound to listen to on Youtube or smth (I personally like Rain on a Car Windshield for slightly somber fics, but you might be into ocean storms or dripping caves or whatever).
4. Heat your feet. I don’t know why but I am entirely unproductive when my feet are cold. Maybe this one is me-specific, but whatevs. Heat the feets!
5. If you’re still having trouble just sitting down and pounding the story out, that’s okay! Maybe it’s not ready to be written yet. Maybe you’re not in the right headspace yet. Sometimes that’s just how it is. One story makes its way out in like, a hour, and the next one takes like, months to finally be written. We all work at different paces. We all write for different reasons.
It might help to figure out why you want to write a story before you write it. Like, if its for attention, it’s gonna be hard as hell. But if there’s an idea that you feel like is important or if there’s a mood you’re trying to work yourself into or out of, then that might be a little easier. For example, I wrote a piece called make it work which is about Fogs finding his motivation to be a lawyer and fight for justice when Kavanaugh was confirmed and I felt super helpless in the face of our present justice system. That story kind of wrote itself and it needed to be written, I feel, not just for me, but for others who were feeling just as helpless.
Writing is catharsis in that way. Maybe you just need to find out what you need to wring out of your soul.
Sorry that got very metaphysical. But I do want to stress that getting started and ending a story are the hardest parts of writing them, so you are definitely not alone if you feel like you’re ramming your head into a wall here.
I hope something here helps you, my dear!
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moonwaif · 6 years
Text
Snow Over Insomnia: ch. 1
Pairings: Gladnis, promptis
Theme: snowed in
Summary:
Once a year, Shiva blesses Insomnia with snowfall. This year's snow day finds four friends in transition. There's Noctis, who's trying his best to enjoy freshman year. With his best friend Prompto enrolled at a different college, it hasn't been easy. When a particularly controversial lecture puts Noctis on the spot, he says some things he regrets. Can he make amends before their friendship freezes over?
Meanwhile, there's Gladiolus, who's finding it increasingly difficult to deny his feelings for coworker and friend Ignis Scientia. The appearance of a mysterious figure from Ignis's past might just be the sign that it's time to come clean. Will Gladio make a move, or will he let the opportunity melt away?
PT. I: 10:12 hours
It was a good thing Noctis had remembered to mute his laptop before class started, because he received his first message from Prompto just twelve minutes into the lecture.
Prompto: brrrr! Freezing my a$$ off this morning
A selfie instantly followed: Prompto in a warm jacket and white beanie, grimacing up at the camera with a steaming coffee cup clutched in his gloved hand.
Noctis: heh. nice pic. whatcha drinking?
Prompto: mocha moogle latte. Yummm ;P
Noctis: all that sugar is gonna give you a headache
Prompto: hahaha yeah, probably. but i need some caffeine. i couldnt sleep all night thinking about that presentation!!!!  。゜(`Д´)゜。
Prompto: so we still getting snowed in tonight?
Noct's smile widened. It wasn’t often that Shiva graced the arid landscape of Lucis with her affections, but at least once a year, snow fell on the city of Insomnia. Sometimes it was a few flakes, sometime just sleet. On rare occasions, such as the one predicted by Insomnian weather channels on this particular day, it was a blizzard.
Noctis: heck yeah! hope you're ready to binge some King’s Knight.
Prompto: ugh am i ever. so ready to chill after getting this presentation out of the way…
Noctis leaned back in his chair, brow furrowing. He cast a quick glance at projector screen down at the front of the hall: a slide about the Lucian civil war.
Noctis: y? U nervous?’
Prompto: yeah
Prompto: stomach hurts
Prompto: p sure im gonna throw up
Noctis: relax, prom
Noctis: you've been practicing a lot, right?
Noctis: you're gonna be great
Prompto: dude you have no idea what id give to hear you say that rn
Prompto: i wish we still went to the same school
Prompto:  。゜(`Д´)゜。
A dull, tight ache formed in the center of Noct's chest. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, the reply coming slower this time.
Noctis: me too.
Prompto: yeah...
Prompto: too bad my best friend has to go to a fancy schmancy ivy league school for geniuses (¬‿¬)
Noctis rolled his eyes.
Noctis: im not here cuz im a genius, prom
Prompto: his majesty is sooooo modest ;)
Noctis: srlsy
Noctis: im like most of the ppl here. average.
Noctis: the only genius ive met so far is specs
Prompto: lol youre just saying that to make me feel better
Noctis: nah. youre way cooler than like half of the people here
Prompto: ♥‿♥
Prompto: too bad i cant afford the tuition lol. id kill to have iggy as my teacher
Noctis glanced up from his computer. From his own seat in the center of the hall, Ignis was just a small figure behind an even smaller podium. Still, Noctis had to admit that Specs was definitely in his element at the front of a classroom. His fitted grey sweater, crisp collar and perfectly coiffed hair were every bit the image of the up-and-coming academian. The freshmen in the front row hung dreamily on every elegant gesture of his gloved hands as his voice rang out through the hall, crisp and clear as water. He said something that sent a murmur of laughter through the rows of desks. Noctis smiled.
Noctis: yeah its not bad
Prompto: duh!! hes probably way cooler than all of my professors combined
Prompto: anyway, g2g. Gonna try to run through my presentation one more time before class starts
Prompto: (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)
Noctis: dont worry prom. Youre gonna kick this presentation in the ass.
Prompto: thanks dude
Prompto: catch ya later
Noctis let his gaze linger on the final message, Iggy’s melodic tones lilting in the background. He tuned in long enough just to get the gist of the topic (ugh - still on the Lucian civil war). He turned his attention back to his laptop and clicked on an open tab, which took him directly to Prompto’s ChocoGram feed. There weren’t any new updates, but that didn’t stop him from smiling as he reviewed some of the earlier posts: Prompto getting ready to dig into a steaming, greasy pizza; a #tbt selfie featuring the baby chocobo they’d helped rescue during their summer road trip to Lestallum; a prank-selfie with a drooling, sleeping Gladio. Noctis chuckled. He’d been there when Prompto had taken that one. Even Gladio had agreed that the shot was just too good not to share.
He continued scrolling. A bunch of people Noctis didn't know, probably at a party; a filtered, black-and-white shot of a glistening, neon lit alley; a selfie with some guy Noctis had never seen before; a picture of the school’s mascot, tagged #gocactuars; Prompto wearing glasses…
Wait a second.
Noctis scrolled back to the photo of Prompto and the stranger. “Hanging with the coolest TA around,” read the caption. Tagged: #whenyourfriendhasthesamemajor, #collegelife #insomniaboys.
Friend, huh?
Noct’s eyes narrowed. He silently listed off any names he’d heard Prompto mention over the past semester as he analyzed the man’s features: platinum hair; a strong chin; sharp, intelligent eyes whose color he couldn’t quite discern through the ChocoGram filter. He let the cursor hover over the smug, obnoxious grin. A tagged username appeared: “Ghiranzenator.”
Before Noctis could really stop to self-reflect, he was scrolling through Ghiranzenator’s feed. It was the kind of content you’d expect from a twenty-something with a pompadour and generic good looks. Gym selfies tagged #fitnesslifestyle; poses in scenic, well-known locations captioned with thought-provoking yet totally irrelevant quotes (ugh, so pretentious). He wondered how Prompto even knew this guy. Was he the TA for one of Prompto’s classes? Did they have mutual friends? If so, why hadn’t Prompto mentioned him before? But now that Noctis thought about it, like really thought about it, he hadn’t really heard Prompto say a whole lot about any of the new friends he was making at school.
Wasn't that kind of weird?
A crumpled wad of paper plummeted through his thoughts, ricocheting off his forehead. Noct's head snapped in the direction it had come from. His eyes were met by a vision of Gladio, squeezed into a desk barely large enough to accommodate his lanky frame.
“Pay. Attention,” he mouthed, cocking his head in Iggy’s direction.
Noctis scowled. That was the one downside of having his bodyguard disguised as a classmate. Gladio was just all too ready to make sure Noct behaved like a good little student. The plus side was that Noct had at least one friend who could commiserate with his suffering.
Like now, for instance. A fan club member from the front row was monologuing, earning exasperated looks from his classmates. Noctis and Gladio exchanged a few muffled snickers.
“Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us, Cleetus,” Ignis cut in, his voice laced with a strain so barely audible that Noct and Gladio were probably the only ones who even picked up on it. “As you have noted for us, it is quite interesting that most rebel demands would be considered centrist by modern standards. However, we should recognize one deconstructionist philosopher whose theories remain polarizing even to this day.”
Ignis went to the next slide. A portrait of a wide-jawed man with a face only a mother garula could love brooded down from the display screen.
“Oh great,” Noctis muttered, drawing a confused look from Gladio. “Not this guy…”
"Regulus Invicta," Ignis continued, "is remembered as one of the strongest advocates for freedom of speech throughout the history of Lucis. However, what is less commonly remembered are his persistent demands for the de-establishment of the monarchy in favor of what we would now refer to as a democratic socialist republic. Even during the Lucian civil war, Invicta was a controversial figure. At first his philosophies were embraced by the deconstructionists, who sought to overthrow the Lucis Caelums in favor of a fragmented nation-states ruled by regional noblemen. They were less in favor of his leanings toward a democratic socialist republic. Despite this difference of opinion, Invicta was one of the few intellectuals of his time that insisted on the right of deconstructionists to espouse their ideals without punishment or censorship. Unfortunately, this insistence, combined with his involvement with radical circles, led to his eventual imprisonment. He would die of consumption shortly thereafter.”
A hand shot up - the same wind-bag from before.
“Yes, Cleetus?” Ignis’s smile was tight.
“Professor Scientia, as you were speaking I couldn’t help but remember an essay I came across in the Lucian History Journal the other day. The article was about the evolution of Lucian collective memory of the civil war.”
Gladio chuckled. “Oh boy. Here he goes again. This guy really can’t stop himself, can he?”
Noctis wasn’t laughing. He wanted Ignis to get back on topic and finish explaining why Invicta and the deconstructionists were wrong.
“According to the arguments propounded throughout the essay” - Gladio actually snorted at this point - “collective opinion regarding Invicta and the deconstructionists split after Lucis became a constitutional monarchy. Invicta was distanced from the deconstructionists and by means of propaganda -”
Bells went off in Noct’s head. Propaganda? What was this guy trying to get at?
“ - and state sanctioned school curriculum -”
Noctis gripped the arms of his desk, knuckles whitening.
“ - Invicta gradually became celebrated as one of the fathers of free speech. Meanwhile, his links to deconstructionists were covered up, preventing further instability to Lucian society while conveniently appropriating the parts that aligned with contemporary values.”
He paused for a breath. Ignis stepped out from behind the podium, quick to seize back control of the conversation.
“Your statements indicate a very post-modern interpretation of the historical records, Cleetus,” he remarked politely. “It’s interesting that you bring up social instability. Although not as commonly espoused today, there are ideologues who from time to time self-identify as deconstructionists. However, they are often ridiculed by both leftists and conservatives, rarely gaining any political legitimacy. In this way, the general public remains largely unexposed to contemporary deconstructionism outside of the occasional satirical representation on late night TV shows or the funnies.”
“You’ve gotta be kidding me.”
There was a rustle as heads turned in Noct's direction. Ignis adjusted his glasses.
“Is there something you would like to share, Prince Noctis?”
Shit. Gladio slid down low in his seat, muttering something that sounded a lot like, “Smooth move, Noct.”
Noctis cleared his throat. His cheeks felt like two flames. “N- not particularly.”
“Very well.” Ignis returned his attention to the slides. Noctis averted his eyes, only to be met by the expectant gazes coming his way from the next row down. His gaze happened to fall on Cleetus, he shot him a particularly snide smirk from over his shoulder.
Something in Noctis snapped.
“It’s just that, you said ‘satirical.’”
Ignis stopped mid-sentence. Scandalized whispers rippled throughout the hall. Gladio was actually facepalming. Meanwhile, Noctis’s cheeks somehow managed to get even hotter. He felt the need to continue.
“I just thought - well, it sounds like you think those depictions are kind of inaccurate, or something.”
Gods, he was sounding extremely upset and defensive right now, wasn’t he? What had happened to all that training in diplomacy and public speaking? Embarrassing.
“Satire is merely a genre, your highness," Ignis demured. "One that hyperbolizes a real-life topic or theme with intent to criticize, ridicule or expose. We may identify this genre from a neutral standpoint without either validating or condemning the arguments contained within the work itself.”
Noctis schooled his expression so it’d look like he’d understood this last bit.
“But you said the satirical representation is the only representation people see. Doesn’t that imply that there’s another representation that most people don’t get to see?”
“There normally is more than one side to every story,” Ignis said lightly, and his lips curved in such a smug, handsome grin that Noctis could have chucked his laptop at him.
“Yeah, but sometimes one side has better evidence than the other one. Shouldn’t that also be part of the discussion?”
He was pressuring Ignis to agree with him, to say that the deconstructionists were “wrong” and the monarchy was “right” and therefore Noctis was right, too. That the deconstructionists were just radical, terrorist nutjobs whose hogwash theories did more harm than good, so why even bother discussing them at all? Noctis knew it. Gladio knew it. Most of all, Ignis probably knew it.
So why were they still disagreeing?
“Indeed. However, the objective of today’s lecture is merely to review the deconstructionism as an historical movement. I will leave the evaluation of the ideas espoused by said movement to all of you in your term papers.”
A smattering of chuckles. Oh yes, how adorable, how clever. Noctis opened his mouth to let loose another retort when Gladio nudged his foot.
"Let it go," he mouthed with a slight shake of his head. Noctis grit his teeth with an audible “tch,” nails biting into the surface of his palms. He deliberately avoided Gladio’s gaze, instead fixing his attention on his laptop. The Ghiranzenator taunted him from the other side of the screen, all chiseled jawline and knowing smile.
Noctis closed the laptop with a ‘snap.’
PT. II: 13:00 hours
“I was too hard on him, wasn’t I?”
The words were out of Ignis’s mouth before Gladio had even stepped through the door. The office was tiny - more like a closet, really. Gladio tossed a small paper bag onto the desk and pulled up a seat, careful not to spill the coffee in his other hand.
“What’s this?” Ignis asked, peering owlishly from behind his computer. Gladio handed over the coffee.
“Thought you could use a pick-me up," he replied. "And nah; Noct is tough. He gets worse from me during an average training session.”
“You’re just saying that,” Ignis mumbled, raising the cup to his lips and taking a sip. “Mmm, Gladio, this is delicious. Thank you.”
Gladio crossed his legs, leaning back with a pleased smile. “Heh. Thought you’d like that. And no, I’m not just saying that. Noct is pissed off, but he’ll live. Try some of the scone.”
Ignis reached into the paper bag obediently. “I should have waited until after class,” he muttered. “Or warned him about the topic before hand.”
“Yeah, that probably would’ve helped.”
“I just don’t want to allow him more special privileges than I already have! How am I supposed to prepare him for his future responsibilities if I keep treating him differently from the other students? Can you imagine, just last night he actually asked me to check his homework!”
“Did you?”
“What do you think?” Ignis snapped. “We live together for Eos’s sake, of course I did!"
“Yikes. How’s the scone?”
Ignis scowled. “You really must stop bringing me sugar. This is why my skin is breaking out.”
“One bite won’t hurt, prince charming.”
Ignis broke a off a tiny piece and popped it into his mouth, but not before shooting Gladio a glare.
“Relax, Iggy. Just give Noct a little time to cool down, think things through. He’ll come around.”
Ignis gave him a doubtful look. He took another bite.
“At least this scone is palatable.”
Gladio flashed him a cheeky smile. “Does that mean you’ll raise my grade professor?”
“I’ll consider it. After all, for an auditing student you do have unusually consistent attendance.”
“Someone’s gotta show up and keep the crown prince in line. Who better than his protector and professional babysitter, the royal shield?”
“Pity you have to sit through my lectures. I imagine it’s dull.”
“Nah. You’re way more interesting than the profs I had during my undergrad.”
‘A lot easier on the eyes, too,’ he thought. His gaze lingered on Ignis’s full, rosy lips before silently flickering away.
“There’s no need for flattery, Gladio. It’s not like I can actually give you credit for the course.”
“Sorry. Guess your little front row fan club is wearing off on me.”
Ignis reddened. He took a hurried sip of coffee, obviously stalling. Gladio grinned, letting himself indulge in the rare sight of a flustered Ignis.
“If the students show enthusiasm,” Ignis began, once he’d finished composing himself, “it is merely due to the engaging nature of the subject.”
“Oh, right. Lucian history makes me blush and squeal, too.”
“Did you come here for the sole purpose of force feeding me scones and distracting me from my work?”
“Why, is it working? Just kidding,” he added quickly at the stern look he received. “Actually, I thought we should touch base on our lovely royal charge’s training schedule over the Solstice. Iris has been bugging me about plans. She wants to invite the entire Amicitia clan over for a get-together.”
“Let me pull up my calendar.” Ignis swiveled in his chair, facing the computer monitor. Gladio contemplated his profile, thrown into sharp relief by the glow of the LED back-light. A million potential lines ran through his head. ‘It should be illegal to be so gorgeous.’ ‘You ever seen an angel up close? Because those cheekbones are high enough to graze the heavens.’
“Got any plans for the Solstice, Iggy?”
“I’m hoping to finish drafting my thesis proposal,” Ignis answered, with a light click of the mouse. “I’d also like to try my hand at a leiden sweet potato casserole. See if I can get Prince Noctis to eat something other than meat for a change.”
Gladio snickered. “Good luck with that last one. By the way, what’s your thesis about again? Food politics - “
“ - with Duscae as a case study for increased multifunctionality in agricultural policy making, yes.” Ignis spared him a brief glance, eyes crinkled with amusement. “I’m impressed you remember.”
‘Course I do,’ Gladio thought dismally. ‘I’ve Moogle searched every article you’ve ever published.’
Fortunately, he was spared the need to reply. One more click of the mouse, and Ignis was tilting the monitor in his direction.
“There we are. So, which dates does Iris have in mind?”
“She’s really got her eyes set on the day of the Solstice, as well the day right before and after. She needs me to help cook, put out decorations…”
‘Basically all the stuff we used to do when mom was around,’ he thought.
“I see. Why don’t I just make a note on my calendar for now? We can continue meeting as planned for the next two weeks. When it comes time, we'll evaluate how Noct is doing. Perhaps it won’t even be necessary for us to meet over the week of the Solstice.”
“Thanks Iggy. I appreciate it.”
“Certainly. It’s imperative that you spend quality time with your family over the holidays, uninterrupted.”
His smile was sad. Of course; Ignis didn't really have any family around to celebrate with. Gladio jiggled his knee, hesitating.
“H-hey, Iggy,” he began cautiously. “Y’know, if you don’t have any plans for the Solstice, you’re always welcome to - “
“Ah, Ignis! Just the man I was looking for.”
Ignis stood as two people Gladiolus had never seen before entered the office. The first was an attractive, bespectacled woman with golden hair swept back in an elegantly casual updo. Gladio, always the gentleman, rose instantly to his feet, pushing in his chair and squeezing back against the bookshelf in an effort to free up some space for her in the tiny room. She was followed by a pale young man who stood shoulder to shoulder with Gladiolus, which was a rare enough occurrence. What was really odd was Ignis's reaction. He blanched as the man entered. Then he was turning away to face the woman, almost as if he'd never even noticed the other visitor at all.
“Dr. Trepe! To what do I owe this pleasure?”
Her lips curved in a perfect cupid’s bow. “Ignis, dear, how many times must I remind you? Call me Quistis. Anyway, I was just giving Prince Ravus a tour of the department.” She gestured toward the man beside her.
Oh - so that’s why he looked familiar. Gladio had often seen the royal Nox Fleuret duo on magazine covers or on TV. Ravus cut a striking figure in person, with his wintry complexion and dual colored eyes. He seemed to resent being watched, interrupting Gladio’s examination with a peculiarly frigid glare.
“Prince Ravus will be joining our department as a research scholar next semester,” Quistis explained. “Your majesty, Ignis is a grad student and TA in our department. As you may be aware, he also serves as the royal advisor to Crown Prince Noctis. He’s quite the feather in the department’s cap.”
Gladio beamed, eyeing Ignis with pride. What he saw surprised him. Iggy’s shoulders were tense, his face frozen in a mask of false politeness.
Something was wrong.
“Thank you, Dr. Trepe. As it stands, I’ve already had the good fortune of making Mr. Scientia’s acquaintance.”
Gladio’s eyes snapped in Ravus’s direction. His expression was unreadable, but his tone of voice suggested that whatever fortune had been at play was anything but “good.”
“Indeed.” Ignis mustered a weak smile. “I’m honored his highness remembers me.”
Ravus flinched, the movement so quick it was barely perceptible. Gladio glanced between them. Whatever vibe was going on here, he didn't like it one bit. He asked the question before he could stop himself.
“How do you two know each other?”
Ignis gasped. “Oh, by the six - where are my manners? Dr. Trepe - “
“Quistis.”
“Quistis” - Ignis blushed - “and Prince Ravus, please allow me to introduce Gladiolus Amicitia, Prince Noctis’s sworn shield, as well as one of my dearest friends.”
Gladio’s chest swelled until it threatened to burst. He crossed his arms, lip quirking up into a satisfied smirk.
'Dearest friend, huh?'
“I see,” Quistis murmured, tapping her chin. Her eyes ran up and down Gladio’s frame with an openly appraising look. “I apologize for interrupting your discussion, Gladiolus. I doubt we made a very good impression.”
“Meeting a colleague of Iggy’s is never an imposition,” Gladio assured her. “Especially not when that colleague is as elegant and beautiful as yourself.”
Quistis blushed, blue eyes sparkling behind her spectacles. “I never imagined the royal shield was such a charmer. You’ll have to bring him around more often, Ignis.”
There was a momentary, infinitesimal fracture in Ignis’s facade. “Yes, well, I daren’t keep his majesty any longer," he said quickly. "I’m sure you’re both quite eager to continue the tour. Prince Ravus, it truly was a pleasure seeing you again. I look forward to our collaboration in the coming semester.”
“As do I,” Ravus snapped, his words laced with such venom that even Quistis sent him a mildly startled look. “Dr. Trepe, shall we?”
“C-certainly. Gladiolus, it was a pleasure. And Ignis, we’ll be seeing you tonight at the reception, won’t we?”
“Of course. The Grand Hotel Insomnia at six o’ clock, correct?”
“Not exactly ideal weather for an event, is it?” Gladio interjected, frowning. “The roads are supposed to freeze after seven.”
Ignis dismissed him with a breezy laugh. “Yes, well, you know what they say Gladio - the show must go on! Until tonight then, Dr. Trepe...Prince Ravus.”
He bowed at the waist. Gladio rushed to follow suit, but not before glimpsing the pain that flashed across the prince’s strange, distant eyes. Then he was gone, sweeping off down the hall without a word of acknowledgement. Quistis rushed after him. Gladio waited until he no longer heard the clicking of her high heels before he spoke.
“What was that all about?”
Ignis began fussing with the papers on his desk. “Dr. Trepe was introducing the newest addition to our department.”
“Who you just happen to already know.”
“Is that so odd? You and I often cross paths with royalty in our line of work.”
“Uh-huh.” Gladio approached the desk, leaning over and splaying both hands across the surface. “So, you gonna tell me how you two actually know each other?”
“I don’t see that it’s any concern of yours,” Ignis replied, voice unusually clipped. Gladio ignored the sting.
“I’m just curious - y’know, as a dear friend and colleague. Why so defensive?”
Ignis slammed down a folder, nostrils flaring. “Fine. Spring 752. I did a semester in Tenebrae. Prince Ravus was a student at the university. We made acquaintance.”
“And?”
“And what?”
Gladio shrugged. “Dunno. Just thought I sensed some hostility between you two.”
“Enough, Gladio!”
The outburst stunned them both. Gladio took a step back. He ran a hand through his hair, trying fiercely not to look as hurt as he felt. After a long moment of silence, Ignis heaved a sigh.
“Forgive me, Gladio. It’s just a rather...unpleasant story, if I’m being honest. I wasn’t expecting to meet him like this, and...I’d rather not talk about it all just yet.”
Gladio chuckled harshly. “Why are you apologizing? I’m the one being the asshole here. Sticking my nose in your business. But if you ever do feel like talking about it, or there’s any way I can help...just let me know.”
“Thank you, Gladio,” he said softly, and the smile he turned on him was so full of warmth and relief that it hurt to look at.
Gladio hurried to change the subject.
“You sure you’re good to go to this reception thing? Ravus will probably be there, too.”
“I’ll be fine. I merely need a moment to compose myself. I do apologize I won’t be able to join you at the gym today. I was quite looking forward to showing off my new gains.”
He wiggled his eyebrows. Gladio snorted.
“Save it for next time, hot shot. But seriously, Iggy - the roads are supposed to get pretty bad tonight. Call me if you need a ride.”
“Certainly; I’m sure Dr. Trepe would just love it if you popped by.”
“Iggy.”
“Don’t worry; I promise I’ll behave myself.”
“You better. Don’t wanna go setting a bed example for Noct.”
Ignis’s smile fell. Gladio rolled his eyes, reaching for the half-eaten pastry on the desk.
“Talk to ‘im,” he said through a mouthful of scone. “Better yet, feed him and then talk. He’s always in a better mood when his stomach’s full.”
“Oh Gladio.” Ignis shook his head. “If only I could be as certain as you are.”
‘But I’m not certain,’ Gladio thought to himself. The uncertainty followed him as he took his leave, wandering through the empty halls of the department alone. Noct could be stubborn, and Ignis had a tendency to cave in. Hopefully they'd be able to come to terms without too much of a fuss.
He was so lost in his thoughts that he didnt see the figure rounding the corner, hurtling straight at him. He barely managed to come to a stop before they collided.
“Whoa there!” he exclaimed, stumbling backward. “My bad, are you - ?”
The charity in his voice withered and died as he looked up into the face of the passerby.
Ravus Nox Fleuret.
“Ahem. Pardon me, your majesty.” He stepped aside, the polite gesture a reflex after so many years as a retainer. Ravus, however, stood quite still, eyes fixed on Gladio intently - almost as if he were measuring him up.
Gladio’s jaw clenched.
“There a problem, highness?”
Ravus looked away, making a soft, dismissive noise in the back of his throat. He strode past Gladio with his nose held high, sharp footsteps echoing off the walls like a hailstorm. Gladio’s eyes narrowed, gaze following him over his shoulder. The uneasy feeling was back, creeping up from the pit of his stomach like clutching vines.
Whatever history Ravus and Iggy had together, Gladio had a sneaking suspicion that it wasn’t the good kind.
He tore himself away with a sigh.
“Forget about it,” he muttered firmly. “Iggy can handle himself. It’s not like you have any say in the matter, anyway.”
Still, it was a good thing he kept a spare set of clothes locked up at the campus rec facility. He was gonna need an extra challenging workout today.
TBC...
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tumblunni · 6 years
Text
Okay the BIG TODAY THING
It seems i might possibly be gone for six months
I've been talking with my support worker about taking a course at this place thats uhh apparantly gonna help me get better with the depressions and stuff. And we had a meeting to go look around the place and make introductions and stuff but i had NO IDEA it would be all such short notice! I might have to move in IN TWO DAYS FROM NOW, what the fuck!!! And like if its not that its gonna be at the end of the week or next tuesday at the latest. Im so fuckin unprepared and im really freakin out!!
..uhh...how to describe it..well i guess its literally a mental asylum? But it's absolutely NOTHING like the horror movie stereotype! Its not a hospital with cages or locked rooms, its just like a big comfy cute shared house. Like a bunch of completely normal small apartment rooms but they just happen to be all connected to a shared kitchen and stuff and have on site nurses and a big schedule of therapy sessions and group activities like pottery class or bowling. You have the freedom to come and go as you please if you're on "voluntarily admitted" status (that's me!) and even if you're on what they call "sectioned" its still not scary loss of all your freedom. The highest level of sectioning is just like "requires an escort"? You're still allowed to go outside but you have a higher level of supervision from your key worker because you could potentially be a danger to yourself. But that's very rare and most people are only on maximum sectioning for a few weeks at the start of their treatment, if they've come straight from a situation of self harm or other concern factors. Most of the "sectioned" patients just have a time limit on how long they can spend on unsupervised outside activity. It's a pretty generous 8 hours apparantly!
So yeah i was getting worried about nothing, thinking i was gonna be in big scary solitary confinement and locked inside a tiny broom closet or jabbed with brain lazers. It honestly just seems like a summer camp resort for adults! And everyone there seems very nice, and im excited for being able to learn life skills like cooking and potential steps towards getting educational qualifications someday. And to have the help of a more specialist support worker who can assist me with even the smallest little problems. Like this nice lady Tazmin (who might be the one i get?) was saying how they've had other people with social anxiety before, and how we could plan "gradual exposure" to all the things that scare me. Like she said she'd be able to come with me and we'd take the bus and them get off at the next stop. That'd honestly be really helpful to help me get over being scared of the crowded spaces on buses, but i'd never be able to do it normally cos i'd be too embarassed taking such a short bus ride. Plus well itd be a waste of money,but if i'm a patient here i would get a free bus pass so it wouldnt be a problem.
Oh and the area seems really nice! Its so different from my stupid house right now in a crowded neighbourhood with NOTHING but houses everywhere for a mile! Its seriously almost a mile's walk to the ONE SINGULAR SHOP IN THE AREA and they close on sundays and dont sell vegetarian food. :( This area around the shared house thingie is a really nice bustling shops place but not super shops? Like i mean its a lovely village that has all the small shops you need, not a huge skyscrapers busy tourist place. The perfect balance of conveinient and not scary! They have a library and a park so close to the place, and a bazillion charity shops holy FUCK im so excited to have charity shops again!! I think you call them thrift shops in america? But i just always really love bargain hunting and finding nice surprises in places like that! And there's places to do pottery classes and group trips sometimes to do stuff like cinema or bowling or just having your big ol scary therapy meeting at the nice coffee shop at the end ot the road.
So yeah dont worry about me guys, im not trapped in some horribke hell place! I'm sure it'll be as non threatening as an Intensive Therapy Boot Camp can possibly be, im just still nervous as hell cos well yeah I Have Social Anxiety And That Is Why I Am Here In The First Place. Im scared im not gonna be able to succeed at this. I really wanna leave at the end and be all mentally buffed up and ready to make all these nice nurses proud!
Oh and man Richard has been so nice about this?? He was super freaked out and apologetic about it being Scary Short Notice, we had a bit of a dumb misunderstanding where he clearly told me and i clearly said yes but i somehow completely misunderstood what he was saying and thought i was saying yes to something else??? So im so fuckin glad that at the very end of the appointment right when i was gonna get out the car he was like 'oh so remember your suitcase on wednesday' and i was like WHAT. Like man can you imagine how much more terrifying it would have been if i just turned up on wednesday with no supplies but the shirt off my back and was like 'wtf where is he driving me OH GOD NO'. Bunni why you so bad at the good of talking!! Seriously richard thanks so much for clearing it up but also AAAAA i accidentally agreed to the shortest of short notice and i dont know if he's gonna be able to reschedule it!!!
And man i was there crying in his car about how i dont wanna be in hospital on my birthday, and babbling all the different things i had planned fot the next few months. And GOD DAMN MY DUMB BRAIN i ended up blurting out that i had a preorder of a videogame that i was gonna miss. And i straight up started explaining pokemon to my mental health counseller who is also a dj, how damn fake does my life sound?? Anyway he said that i'll still be able to keep him as my support worker when i get back out of this, and we'll still have weekly or monthly meetings while i'm in there. And he keeps reminding me that i'm free to leave if i feel uncomfortable, but i know that i'd feel like a failure if i did! So he legit fuckin goddamn said (THIS SOUNDS SO FAKE) that i could take a day off when the dumb game comes out, and he'd play co op pokemon with me. HOLY GEEZUS RICHARD YOU'RE LIKE THAT HOLY GRAIL OF THERAPISTS! And man he even said it wasnt embarassing for me to sleep with a teddy bear and he'd help me pack it up safe and ensure nobody saw it while we move my bags into my new room. And then i was like "uhh but also the teddy bear is a giant lifesize embarassing pokemon merchandise" and he was like "okay so we need DOUBLE STEALTH". Apparantly the new sequel to Pokemon Go is Pokemon Sneak! God he helped calm me down from this freakout so much, he's always great with lil jokes and motivational sayings. And i talked about how i first started being interested in Obscure Deep Sea Slug Facts because pokemon has some characters based on weird real life animals, and like its Very Educational Honest, And Has Appeal For Both Kids And Adults. How on earth did this turn into Motovational Pokemon Blabber Time??? Anyway thats how i ended up texting a professional psychologist pictures of gastrodon at 7.30pm.
SO
Yeah
In summary
I'm mostly just worried cos this is short notice! And cos its such a big commitment that being short notice is Super Bad. I need to friggin clean the whole house top to bottom in two days, so it doesnt get all gross and attract flies while im gone. And i need to toss out like a hundred bucks worth of frozen food that aint gonna keep for 6 months. And i need to wash all my damn clothes. And i dont even have a suitcase and this is at a terrible time where i dont get paid for a week so i cant buy a new one right now!! And damn i DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT TO TAKE AAAAAA
And the BIGGEST PROBLEM
Is that i wont be able to talk to you guys for half a year!!!
They dont have wifi and im not allowed to take my computer anyway. They only allow laptops and all i have is a desktop and AAAA its too short notice to save up enough to get a laptop mannnnn! Fuck man i didnt even think about that, i need to go pause my broadband internet for six months, do they even allow you to come back after that long?? And man part of me wants to ask to borrow money from friends to get a laptop but i know this time i cant promise to pay you back within the month cos AAAGH ALL OF THIS SHIT!! Like damn man if anyone is willing to let me pay back a hundred and fifty quid in 6 months??not bloody likely!! And man the only place to get a laptop in TWO GODDAMN DAYS is stupid fuckin Amazon :( but god im gonna go stir crazy being unable to do art or gamemaking or friggin anything to occupy myself!! I can bring my 3ds but i barely have any games for it and ive already finished all of them except harvest moon a new beginning which i quit cos it was bad. And the screen is broken anyway gahhh. SO MANY THINGS I NEED MONEY FOR IN SUCH A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME THAT IS NON CONDUCTIVE TO MONEYING
So anyway GAHH i wont have an internet connection in the house, and i'll be able to walk down the hill and use the library computers hopefully at least weekly, but they forbid all social media sites. So like can i get the emails of everyone who wants to keep in contact? Man i dont know how im gonna manage this AAAAA!!! i will send u loads of pics of scenic asylum beauty and dumb updates on my stupid life of probably very little progress.
And AGGGHHH i dont even have the time to plan a blog queue or anything fuck man geez aaaaaaaa
I NEED TO BUY A NEW PAIR OF TROUSERS WITHOUT HOLES IN THE KNEES man i cant live on singular pantage in a shared house
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Note
Would you be willing to share your gem head-canons? 0:
dklsalkffkld putting under a readmore cause its embarrassin////also got dailyabbs permission to post cause they’re in the chat too lmao
mostly about charoite, purple pearl/obsidian, and my pink diamond diavolo
Sailorbeefcake-05/10/2017Hm What sort of personality do you think they’d have?Futes-05/10/2017i feel like they’d be a smug bitch tbh “since we’re so dedicated to our diamond, obvs we’re the best and most loyal ”Sailorbeefcake-05/12/2017Man tho, other than being a jerk makes me wonder what their personality is like!I bet that they’re, hmTERRIFYINGLY goal-focused Probably also rather smug, tooFutes-05/12/2017yessssssssssswould deff be super super focused on their goalwould also aim to getting perfect marks on their missions too if they ever got any like a higher up asking them to get then a drink and they come back ten secs later with onehigher ups probs wouldnt really care about how fast they got it for them but theyd be smug about iti can also see them super beating themselves over any mistake they do no matter how smallSailorbeefcake-05/12/2017Eeee, nice! And yeah goddamnPoor thing would probably unfuse whenever they messed upFutes-05/12/2017>accidentally places the fork on the wrong side WELP TIME TO DIE defusesSailorbeefcake-05/12/2017FUCKFutes-05/12/2017lmao thohow tf would dopp and abba even meet if theyre under different diamonda????Sailorbeefcake-05/12/2017Diamonds interact a lot!They seem more like a family than likeRulers of different kingomsKingdomsFutes-05/12/2017OHHH DO THEY???Sailorbeefcake-05/12/2017But yeah, the diamonds seem to be very closeFutes - 05/12/2017AAWWWW QWQokay then yeah it would be be possible that those two have met before lmaoi can see diavolo being a lazy diamond and making pearl dopp go to everything for himSailorbeefcake - 05/12/2017Ye!Or less lazy and more paranoidMaybe he escaped an attack on his life or something?Futes - 05/12/2017and with that power thing you gave abba, wouldnt that make him more valuable/higher up?ppffttt poor dia, even in a gem au where hes a diamond and loved hes still paranoid
Futes-Last Saturday at 7:17 PMkicks down ur door with more gem au stuffso I W A S THINGKIHNwell idk how the pink diamond/diavolo is in this au but assuming he still has the same personality, bitch is still paranoid af rightand with how abba/obsidian specializes in looking back into the past and shit would be something diavolo would be very intrested in, probs would want/request abba to look into whatever thing hes currently paranoid like he thinks someone went into his, do diamonds have rooms/places they mainly stay at?????, well w/e but would probs think someone tampered with his stuff or thinks other gems are trying to conspire against him and would want abba to see if its true or notidk how abba is to other diamonds, or how other diamonds feel about having their gems used by other people but
Futes - Last Saturday at 8:00 PMjust diavolo sending doppio to go bother abba for this shit constantly and sometimes forcefully dragging abba away since dopp would only care about making his diamond happy, fuck everyone elseand them getting fused a lot becuase charoites a fucking slut that wants to please every higher up as long as its a diamond praising them and making them feel like their better than other gems because they got direct praise for the diamondsk thats all ive been thinking about these past two days tyim trying to work on that pic but i cant get that ass spanking shit out of me head and i want to hit youSailorbeefcake - Last Saturday at 10:17 PMFuckOmg that all sounds awesome! Except for hitting me about the spanking shit lmaoBut yeah, I could see it!Diamonds often make use of gems belonging to other diamonds.Futes - Last Saturday at 10:19 PM///////////////////////////////// its ahrd to come up with shit cause idk how the diamond/hoomeworld i think it was called? idk how they work n shitSailorbeefcake - Last Saturday at 10:21 PMYeah, it’s pretty mysterious in general! Most of the gems we see much of are criminals who defected.But yeh, I could see Obsidians being passed around a lotFuccFutes - Last Saturday at 10:21 PMhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhSailorbeefcake - Last Saturday at 10:21 PMJust thinking of Diavolo like, grabbing AbbaSailorbeefcake - Last Saturday at 10:21 PM‘You. Fuse now’Futes - Last Saturday at 10:22 PMBUT YESAND LIKE if i rememebrwhen lapis and jasper fused, did whatever gem that was keep the water powers?Sailorbeefcake - Last Saturday at 10:25 PMYep!Malachite was incredibly powerfulAnd another gem who has the power of seeing the future appears to keep the future-vision in her fused stateFutes - Last Saturday at 10:26 PMokay so charoite would also def still have the ability to look into the past so diavolo would def be making dopp and abba fuse cause charoite would be easly to order around than abba>diavolo throwing doppio like a football at abba YEETFUSE DAMN ITSailorbeefcake - Last Saturday at 10:30 PMFUCKPoor fucking babies, my godFutes - Last Saturday at 10:32 PMdoppio has probs stopped caring lmaowould deff be used to being diavolos little bitch anywaysSailorbeefcake - Last Saturday at 10:32 PMFugI could see Abba being kinda upset about it'I am Buccellati’s gem’Futes - Last Saturday at 10:33 PMi feel like diavolo would deff be worse personality wise as a diamond tbh since everyone would know who he is and isnt really going into hiding/cantreally snappyprobs sensory overloaded all the timeSailorbeefcake - Last Saturday at 10:35 PMYeah fuckSpecially scary since Diamonds are fucking hugeFutes - Last Saturday at 10:35 PMFUCK LMAO I FORGOT ABOUTNOW PICTURING HUGE DIAVOLO THROWING TINY DOPP AT ABBA OR DROPING HIM ON HIM(edited)LMAO RIPSailorbeefcake - Last Saturday at 10:36 PMFuck, hahahaFutes-Last Saturday at 10:37 PMhhmm now i wonderhow do diamonds feel about destroying their gems? cause i can deff see diavolo getting rid of some if he really felt like they’re traitors but idk how thats handled in show or if its even brought upSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 10:43 PMYeah, Blue Diamond threatens to shatter a Ruby for fucking upAnd I think Yellow holds the same viewsShe talks about shattering an entire caste of gems because of the actions of oneFutes-Last Saturday at 10:43 PMOOHHHHHHHHi see nice nicethen yeah diavolo would deff be using abba/charoite to weed out 'traitors’if they’re really traitors or not is probs a mystery since this is diavolo we’re talking aboutSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 10:45 PMFugPoor bastards :Wonder if Abba would end up taking a stand against it and getting shattered himselfOr at least threatened with itFutes-Last Saturday at 10:46 PMpearl dopp keeps a blank face/outlook on it all probs cause hes seen some/ALL shitoooooohhhhhhhhhnooooooooo abba ;w;rip babyif abbas ability isnt all that rare then diavolo would probs break him rip. tbh at this rate i might end up desinging a pink diamond dia since i forgot that there’s already a canon pink dia that someone else owns oppsSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 10:48 PMI’d say it’d be relatively rare!But not like, unique just to himHmItFutes-Last Saturday at 10:50 PMhmhmmhmhmh then abba would probs either just get hurt or something since his ability would deff be too important for diavolo to get rid of just like that if its hard to findSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 10:50 PMIt’d probably be in his best interests to keep Abba tho, since he’s already somewhat familiar with himFutes-Last Saturday at 10:50 PMyaSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 10:50 PMAnother Obsidian could be even more troubleFutes-Last Saturday at 10:51 PMya and a new dopp fusion with another obsidian would probs not be as obedient as charoite>tfw you want to kill this obsidian because it keeps talking back about how you run things>but the fusion game? ridiculousSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 10:53 PMFugMan thoI worry about Abba and DopThey could start to lose their sense of self if they were made to be fused too often and for too longFutes-Last Saturday at 10:55 PMi can deff see that start to happen tbh, like the gem au has the whole homeworld/gems that went to earth war shit going on ya?Sailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 10:55 PMYeMan :Dop could feel betrayed if Abba ended up siding with Buccellati’s gang, who’d def be the traitorsFutes-Last Saturday at 11:02 PMhhhhhhhhhhhi honest to god have no idea how hed even react other than a silent shut down?like idk if gems start to get attached to other gems they fuse with a lot but i can see doppio not understanding how someone could just betray their diamonds just like that, esps someone he’s worked with a lot and probs one of the few other gems hes really fused with and wouldnt know what to do other than to do nothingSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 11:08 PMPoor Doppio, goddamn :It’d probably be pretty lonely, his jobFutes-Last Saturday at 11:08 PMyeahhhhhhhhhhhh lmao probs would be?cause on one hand you have diavolo probs getting rid of gems left and right, and on the other traitorsand heres dopp stuck in the middlehe’d probs only end up staying with diavolo cause its all he has leftSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 11:10 PMYeahPoor baby, goddamnFutes-Last Saturday at 11:15 PMfug thowhite diamonds kinda hotSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 11:22 PMYeHa ha Abba’s diamond is better than Dops!!!Futes-Last Saturday at 11:22 PMfuqNO BULLYPINK DIAMOND MAY BE A SHIT BUT DOPPIO STILL LOVES HIM maybe????????????whatisloveSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 11:24 PMFuckPoor DopFutes-Last Saturday at 11:25 PMthe only relationship i can see diavolo having with dopp is probs a lowkey abusive one?like if dopp wasnt uncaring and if charoite was a top fusion, probs would have shattered him by nowi can see diavolo going through pearls like they’re nothingSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 11:32 PMSighI’m imagining it nowHe could just smash them to blow off steamFutes-Last Saturday at 11:35 PMprobs deff during an sensory overload episode and he’s v stressed out and double paranoid, like one slight thing someone does wrong or gives diavolo the wrong idea S M A S Hhow loud diavolos area is that day are probs days you avoid himSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 11:36 PMYeah, fuckFutes-Last Saturday at 11:38 PM>makes all these ideas for an au i know shit about 8’)how did we get to this bifihow did we go from me doodling to all thisSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 11:39 PMFuckYou tell me lmaoIt’s cool tho!Poor Doppio though, god damnFutes-Last Saturday at 11:40 PMdopp went from a blank face gem cause i thought it looked good on him to a blank face WITH REASONSabba some how got looped in all this au talk too ripSailorbeefcake-Last Saturday at 11:42 PMFuck, poor guy :At least his and Dop’s fusion is still damn cool!Ooh manCould be interesting if they wound up fusing AFTER Abba defectedFutes-Last Saturday at 11:42 PMFf u u uuuu uuckckckckgodddddddddddthat would fuck abba up more if anythingsince charoite is more for diamonds only??? like idk how hed be if he got ordered around by say bruno, probs an intresting reaction would probs feel funny about it but not really in a bad way but still would be pissed that someone as low as him is trying to order him around. but i can deff see charoite not really sure what to do, since hes fused with someone thats now a traitor but wants to go back to serving diavolo tho he know he would most likely get killed on site.
fusion song chat got cut cause it wasnt really important but we both agreed on a song for themhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uk5M_q9eID0
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onlylovekpop · 7 years
Text
I’m Back!
Hello, everyone. Sorry I’ve been MIA for a little while. The past few weeks have been a little hectic for me. I’m closing drabble requests now and have received lots of good ideas. Thank you to all of those who submitted! Also, two of the requests have turned into oneshots (this is a rare thing, but sometimes I get carried away and it happens lol.) The oneshots will be a pirate!au with some smut for Jimin and a dance camp smut with Yugyeom. I’m also finishing up my first Jungkook smut oneshot that I started working on ages ago and involves Netflix and chill. Hehe. Hope you’re all doing well and please look forward to the upcoming drabbles and oneshots! :)
(replies below the cut beware im drinking vodka while i answer to make my responses more interesting hehe (actually im getting as drunk as i can to deal with my vengeful uterus which is very unhappy i have not conceived any spawn this month and is giving me cramps from hell) you may notice my spelling grammar and punctuation get worse as you read please dont hold it against me)
anonymous asked: Hi Leigh we haven't heard of you since you mentioned having knee surgery the next day and I had this really bad feeling I hope you are ok? For some reason I am genuinely concerned and I don't know why so I hope everything went well??
Yes, all is well! I healed in pretty good time and am already out and about again. It’s a surgery I’ve had before so I knew what to expect and nothing out of the ordinary happened. Thank you for checking on me. Sorry if I made you worry :)
omg-mystarx-neoctech asked: Hell YES JOOHEON.
I SAY THIS ON A DAILY BASIS!
anonymous asked: Can I just say I fucking love the layout and look of your blog. Also I just read one of your smuts and holy shit im deceased.
Thank you! I’ve been revamping some of the pages but I only have a few of them done, so a few things may be blank at the moment. I changed it so fics are listed by member instead of type I hope that’s better but if anyone has opinions on the layout please let me know :)
anonymous asked: OKAY BUT THAT JOOHEON SMUT WAS FUCKING DELICIOUSLY SINFUL. I'M HAVING HEART PROBLEMS.
Jooheon himself is deliciously sinful tbh. I have heart palpitations every time I see a pic of him wearing tight pants. Or just pants in general. i aint never seen such pretty thighs before
neon-flamingos asked: I read Rhythm and omg i criedddddd it was so good i just can imagine Jooheon saying all those dirty thingssss my vayjayjay cries
look i recently saw that vid of him speaking english and his accent is so good which means i can totally hear him in my head saying all them naughty english things this is not good what have i done my lady parts also cry HELP
anonymous asked: Everyone is talking about the Jooheon smut and I'm here still crying because of how hard Chained up hit me
oh god that was not my best work but im glad you enjoyed it the thing never got edited i hope its not a hot mess haha sorry markiepooh but it still got the job done i think hehehe
anonymous asked: A part of me regrets reading Underworld AF....but it was such a good read too... that last chapter HURT but it was a good hurt
oh no dont regret reading it! that makes me sad! its a long ass fic i dont want you to get to the end of it and think holy shit i wasted so much time reading that horror flick i tried to bring it full circle in the end im glad you thought it was a good read i panicked for a second haha
honeyheonie asked: HOLY FUCK!!!! I have sinned. 'Rythm' was 👌👌👌👌👌
me too darling ;) thank ya
anonymous asked: Do you have a quote or prompt list we could use? :)
i do not. i leave it up to you guys that way you have lots to choose from
topaz-and-turquoise asked: For some reason, I only just got to binge-read the last 3 chapters of Underworld. Leigh. LEIGH. YOU ARE THE QUEEN OF BTS-GOT7 CROSSOVERS. YOU ARE THE QUEEN OF CROSSOVERS. THE QUEEN OF ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE AU'S. OF ALL AU'S. YOU ARE THE BEST AT WRITING TENSION AND HEART-WRENCHING SCENES AND THE COMPLEXITY OF PEOPLE AND JUST HOLY FRICK YOU'RE AMAZING. THANK YOU FOR THIS. I KNOW YOU ALREADY KNOW BUT THIS IS MY FAVOURITE KPOP FANFIC OF ALL TIME. I'M SAD IT'S OVER BUT I'M SO SATISFIED. YOU ARE THE BEST.
she calls ME QUEEN! thank you thank you I SQUEAL A LOT AT THIS im actually sad its over too. but im content with it. I HOPE IT IS FOREVER YOUR FAVE you stuck with me through the whole thing thank you i love you
statetheobvious04 asked: I've long been a follower for your underworld series and Jesus christ it's one of the best series of read ever. The storyline was so gripping and full of love and loss that by the time I finished the last chapter my chest was heavy and I nearly cried. Idk how you did it but I feel like I've personally lived through minas insane and perilous journey and felt every single emotion as if it were my own. It's een a while since I've read the earlier chapters but I feel like if I do il start 1/2 2/2 sobbing. You are such an amazing and talented writer that this story deserves to be developed into a book or movie but eve then those may not do it justice. But honestly, thank you so much for sharing and writing. And I’m so happy mina finally got the life she deserves and that everyone else managed to find peace in Iceland 💜💜💜💜
THIS MAKES ME HAPPPY YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW CAN I DESCRIBE MY JOY AT THIS MESSAGE you make me cry thank you for loving mina and thank you for supporting the story and thank you for telling me how it felt to read it i love you <3
anonymous asked: hi leigh! I have a question. I hope it doesn't come across the wrong way, I'm just curious! May I ask why you're not taking exo requests?
you’re good honey :) honestly im just not in an exo mood at the moment. i still write for them i still even have a baekhyun oneshot in my drafts idk im just not feeling like writing for them for drabbles at the moment if that makes sense
anonymous asked: Do you still open the drabble request?
they are closed now.
anonymous asked: I'm a Yoongi at heart but your story Underworld made my heart 'boom boom'. Seriously this is the best mafia /zombie apocalypse AU I have ever read and I read a lot of fan fiction. Keep up the good work. PS: Some drabbles based on Underworld wouldn't hurt. PSS: If you don't understand the heart boom boom reference , go see the latest Buzzfeed interview of BTS.
i can’t help but only hear got7′s boom boom boom though haha im down for underworld drabbles i think i mentioned before that any gang!au drabbles i do will be in the underworld universe before the zombie outbreak so far i only have the one for bambam i would link it but im too tipsy for something that level right now sorry :D
anonymous asked: I fucking love your angst writings, they get me emotional aha
thank you i love angst i like toying with emotions ehehe
anonymous asked: Underworld is amazing!!! One of the best stories I've read, even though it has me crying from Paris all the way to the end.😭😭😭😭 You done good. 😁
we dont talk about paris haha jk that one hurt too much thank you darling that its one of the best you’ve read means the world to me :)
anonymous asked: How can you write like thattttt!!!! I adore you. I'll always be your follower 💖
AND IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU and i’ll always be here! i promise <3
anonymous asked: Who is that in your header gif?
It’s Suga :)
thewriterpixie asked: *squeals* I just finished reading the Suga father/daughter date drabble! It made my day!
Thank you! I love that one so much :)
anonymous asked:  Okay I was reading Wake Up and Play with Me and for some reason it reminded me of their song Paradise?¿¿ Now whenever I hear it I'm gonna associate it with this smut xD
Ooh i like the sound of that! i really love Paradise but I think Sign is my favorite on the album but how do you get your question marks upside down i thought the room was spinning for a second i kid you not lol
anonymous asked: Your Jooheon smut got me looking at Jooheony at a different way now 😏 thank you for writing such a quality one shot! You're one of the best of the best!
YAS come to the jooheon side we have thick thighs and adorable dimples you will not regret this ;)
taecmekai asked: hope you are ok and recovering well from your knee surgery :)
i’m okay! gained a few pounds from being stuck on the couch for a few days but idgaf hehe ;) i’ll get back to yoga when i feel like it
coppertopging asked: I just finished Underworld. holy crap the emotional coaster you took me on! I read the last 7 chaps today & i couldn't stop crying. I didn't when Jae died, but his 'funeral' got me with the reactions from everyone. & then Hobi?! That was the most painful. I had to stop & pull myself together. Yoongi made me laugh a little with his delivery. My favorite part of the ending was the Jk/Yugy part. The only thing I felt was missing was more detail into Namjoon & Jin. But this story was amazing!!!
yeah hoseok was the hardest for me too. i wanted to keep anything namjin related kinda vague and open to the reader’s interpretation that’s why there wasn’t much material there but im very glad you enjoyed the story thank you :)
anonymous asked: holy fucking shit. it's 4am and i just finished reading Underworld and i'm crying so hard there's so many emotions i'm feeling. thank you so much for that masterpiece. it's the first work of yours i've read and omfg you're talented as fuck. i'm actually a bit speechless still tbh it's only fully processing to me ...hobi... he's not even my bias but i'm crying so hard i need help wow SO MUCH LOVE FOR U AND UR WRITING THO
omg i cant believe you stayed up that late to read it i wish i could do that but in my old age i dont bounce back that well anymore (i just turned 27 and am very upset about it) anyway THANK YOU this makes me very happy
danphilandstuff asked: OH MY FUCKING GOD RHYTHM WAS SO FUCKING GOOD THANK YOU SO MUCH ITS ACTUALLY HOW I IMAGINED HIM TO BE IT FELT SO REAL IT WAS ACTUALLY THE BEST FANFIC IVE EVER READ IM CURRENTLY READING YOUR MASTER LIST. you're actually such an amazing writer thank you so much (Could I request more Jooheon fics? ((If you want and have time)) )
i will never stop writing jooheon fics. you have nothing to worry about there haha. WHAT DO YOU MEAN ITS THE BEST FANFIC YOUVE READ IT WAS SUCH A RAUNCHY SEX FEST I SHOULD BE ASHAMED lol just kidding no but in all seriousness THANK YOU I LOVE YOU IM GLAD YOU LOVED IT I HOPE YOU KEEP COMING BACK FOR MORE MUHAHA
anonymous asked: (1/3) Hey lovely! I came across your blog today after reading your monsta x all in one shot and i just wanted to say thank you for writing something so incredible! it had me gripped from start to finish and it was honestly one of the most (2/3) well-written pieces ive ever read, I would love to be able to write at your standard one day. I cant express how grateful i am, it put me through so many emotions and i actually had tears in my eyes at one point! So yeah, apologies for this (3/3) being so long but i just wanted to express my gratitude and say that you are an amazing writer :) x
oh my goodness this was ridiculously lovely. i am very proud of All In and how it turned out. i hope to finish the sequel soon. i keep getting writers block on it and i dont know why but anyway. thank you for sending me this and im thrilled that i could write something you enjoy very much. you are too kind thank you <3
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kindofsharethat · 8 years
Text
so last night people were sharing stories of how they became larries and i thought i’d make a big (emphasis on big) ol list of them because i found them really fun to read
I've been a 1D fan since 2013 and my sister and i always thought that l&h looked so good together but only the bromance and we're like "omg larries destroyed their friendship poor eleanor 1!1!1!", then in 2015 the "i'm gay pretty unfortunate isn't eleanor ?" happened and i was like WHAAT???? and i ended up searching more and more about larry (bc it was the only thing that came to my mind) and i found the videos and then i told my sister and then here we are.
I became a larrie because someone in my dash who rarely post about 1D posted the first louis/fred pic and tagged it babygate. So I went looking into the tag and found everything. I had doubt but then i saw the moment where H touch L arm and i was in! I actually became a fan of the music after. I've done everything in reverse with this band! But when i entered the fandom in feb2016 and i was hopping to see it all end like a month later! But hey, still here! And loving it mostly! End it!
it was 2011 and my friend told me she had found a really good song and the singers were so cute, she showed me wmyb video and i spent the whole day listening to it and then in the evening i wanted to find out more about these 5 guys. i started watching video diaries ans i was looking for the next one but i accidentally clicked "best larry moments" video aaand the rest is history
I became a larrie after aimh tweet hits 2m and everyone on all of my social media started freaking out even though I didn't follow any 1D blogs so I started search about them and now I'm here also at that time I was kinda homophobic 'cause I live in russia and grown up in middle eastern family and now I'm proud lesbian who knows a lot about LGBTQ+ history so thank you to my larents and 1D for making me gay lol 🌈💕
i was a fan since 2011 but didnt know about larry bc i was young and didnt have any social media but around 2013-2014 my friend showed me the "are you and louis dating" vid and i was like the mr krabs meme bc i just couldnt understand why larry would have to be covered up so i went home and watched "why elounor is fake" videos and my eyes were open and ever since that day ive been a larrie and i regret not knowing sooner but im here now !!
i saw the daddy daddy cool tweet and was like dude that's the wrong type of daddywtf? & I hadn't heard about a pregnancy? then a week later I had read the treatise and had a side blog and watched all the freddieismyqueen videos & was in way too deeeep lol. I've never been around when they weren't on the break even, I'm so confused about how I got here but now I can't escape 😝I had never even listened to their music before but then I also did that and was like damn they're so good?!
I just remembered going out once and being quite tipsy when DMD video came on so I pointed to Louis and Harry and said 'they're in love, but shh nobody can know' and one of my friends looked at me with a WTF?? expression on her face and said 'but I thought that was common knowledge'. Mind you, she still doesn't even know their names, let alone anything else. That was around the time bg was still a fresh wound and I'll never forget it bc it was so nice to hear it and also my hangover was a bitch.
I got interested in 1D right after their last concert, like right on Halloween. I became a Larrie that very same day too, right after i read Dan Wattpad's infamous "Harry and Louis hate each other". I saw articles floating around saying how they were enemies, reason for Zayn leaving...blah blah. I was sceptical, then i came across the famous OTRA hug, and i was like, no fucking way they hate each other, not with how they are hugging. I then delved into YT and discovered freddieismyqueen. Bless.
I joined july 2014 (2 months after they 've passed my country ouch) and was instantly hooked because this shit is like crack. Today I'm the darkest larrie that exists preaching the word for everyone who'll listen. I can WAIT for their CO because I have a party prepared? I literally have a wine since 2014 in my cellar that I'm only going to open the day they're free, I have nauthical theme stocked for the party. My friends just know that they have to come and that I'll be crying the whole month!!
weirdly enough i became a larry cos of that stupid channel 4 documentary id never heard of larry or gay shipping or whatever before that and i saw that and i was very mr krabs meme and i looked into it saw that it wasn't evil and gross like they were portraying it and never turned back
I joined the fandom in late 2012 and I wasn't a larrie but I wasn't an anti either i just hadn't looked into it but then i remember during the confirmation of bg on gma i felt bad for harry and i didnt really know why and I was surprised by my own reaction. Then with bg going on I started to realise that none of that could be real I did my research and I've been a larrie ever since :)
I joined the fandom in 2012, used to think Elounor was real but just because I never looked into it and I knew some people thought Larry was real at the time so I checked this insta page that debunked Elounor and I have no regrets 💙💚
When I become a 1D fan, in 2012, I liked elounor and I liked Eleanor unfortunately. I was not that into fandom things so I wasn't paying attention to details. But my whole view changed in 2014 when they came to South America for the WWAT and all those rumors in Argentina with the hotel room and Brazil that was an experience and I was like "ok something is happening here between them" and here I am, 4 years later and going strong as a larrie. I'm on the winning team 😌💅🏼
I became a larrie when my friend first introduced me to fanfiction. I read a larry one and was totally amazed by it. After that, I switched between het ones and larry ones, but always came back to larry. After that, I simply became obsessed with the pair, something that made me fall in love with the band and all of them. I watched the dairies and everything, and just saw how clear their infatuation was. Tumblr and a lot of other sites just simply proved the theory even more. No regrets ❤
i became a larrie late novemeber after a month of being in the 1d fandom. i watched freddieismyqueen videos and other proofs for hours everyday (especially over thanksgiving break)
I wasn't even a fan of 1D, but while I was looking for pictures of them to do a collage for a friend, I found one in which Louis and Harry were looking at each other and, damn, I can't explain what I felt, I just knew it. So, I was trying to figure out if I was the only one thinking there was something between this two, and it turned out I wasn't! I discovered tumblr, and I spent 3 days reading post, watching videos and proofs and...here I am, 3 years after, being the larriest larrie
I became a 1d fan when uan tour had just started and like. I watched all the damn youtube videos in about a week and I noticed that in the video diaries on the stairs they were so ~cozy, and they were so Extra™ on stage and hl weren't like that with the other boys. They just emanated the feelings I suppressed: Ultra Gay. And yeah. That's how it Began for me
I became a larrie when I watched the behind the scenes of wmyb and Louis was saying "I've gotta say it" and Harry was all over him and hid his face in Louis' shoulder and said "no!"
Same like that previous anon i hadnt even considered two guys being more than friends bc of where i grew up. But just watching proof videos of them for a while i kind of realized how in love they were. Thats when i started thinking about how different and colorful the world actually is compared to what I've learned from the people i grew up around
I became a larrie when my friend and I would watch their video diaries together, and I would see the way h&l acted with each other. I mentioned it to my friend and she was like yeah, Larry, and she showed me one YouTube video so I spent weeks watching every single one I could find, all these years later and I've come to accept theres no way to crawl out of this 😂
are we sharing larrie stories? my friend became a fan early 2012 (and a larrie) and was adamant on making me on too, and I finally gave in summer 2013. I rmr the day after TCAs that year, niall tried to do a twitcam and idr how but some article got written abt the twitcam that included a link to those 'you just have to pay attention' videos. I marathoned them all, and it was that arm moment that zayn failed to hide that #sealed it. though my friend gave me the skinny on haylor back in 2012~
i was like a super casual fan since their first album. my friend introduced them to me cuz she was crushing on zayn. i just knew their music but not actually them. i became a larrie during weedgate. weird timing, i know. i saw it on the news and got curious about what was going on. saw the video then got to know about the boys individually through past vids. i started from the very start from the xf vid diaries. those two, not subtle AT ALL. and well, the rest was history.
i was in entirely different fandom back in 2014, but one of my follower turns into a liam stan and starts to post about 1d and there was a post about how harry and louis can't touch each other and i thought that was really weird weren't they bandmates?? then i started digging around and stumble into a treatise blog. here i am now hahaha
I got into this fandom because of my best friend. She showed me week 4 diary video... and I was like are those two in a relationship?? I pointed at louis and harry and she said no why? And I was like I don't know they seem cozy together and I pointed out that harry was staring at louis lips... she didn't believe me first but now she is a larrie😂 So basically I got into this fandom knowing larry is real
I became a fan of the boys 4 years ago. I read about Larry and that fans believed they were together so I went on YouTube and saw some videos and read some stories (I think it was here on tumblr??) and I immediately believed they were together. There wasn't a particular moment for me, it was a lot of things. Probably, above all, the way they looked at each other. They never looked at someone else so fondly. And 4 years later I keep saying the same thing 💖
for me, i always thought louis was gay from way back in 2011 but i didn't really think of harry's sexuality cause i wasn't like a stan i was just a casual fan [which is why it confuses me when people say that if larry isn't real, louis is straight and horrible, no...he still gay as hell babe]. anyway i became a larrie cause i used to really follow celeb gossip and when the news dropped, gossip sites/tabloids kept mentioning harry and larries everywhere so i decided to investigate and...here i am
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pussywiki · 8 years
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all of the vaguely nsfw asks (u can skip some of ure not comfortable answering them)
Omg thank you angel!! I might have to put this under a cut, but we’ll see
1. Are looks important in a relationship?: To an extent, but they are in no way the most important thing in a relationship
2. Are relationships ever worth it?: Absolutely
3. Are you a virgin?: I am
4. Are you in a relationship?: Yes
5. Are you in love?: Yea
6. Are you single this year?: No
7. Can you commit to one person?: Yup
8. Describe your crush: Does Shana still count as a crush if I’m dating her?
9. Describe your perfect mate: Chill, respectful, good sense of humor, supportive, likes animals, and probably some other stuff but I can’t think of more rn. It’s all personality stuff tho
10. Do you believe in love at first sight?: No
11. Do you ever want to get married?: Maybe someday 
12. Do you forgive betrayal?: Very rarely
13. Do you get jealous easily?: Depends, but usually yea
14. Do you have a crush on anyone?: Does Shana count?
15. Do you have any piercings?: I have my septum, my belly button, and my ears pierced
16. Do you have any tattoos?: No, but I really want some!! I have tons planned
17. Do you like kissing in public?: Yup
20. Do you shower every day?: Yea
21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?: I mean I’d like to think my gf does
22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?: Idk, probably not
23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?: Totally
24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?: Probably not
25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?: Ya. Im a relationship person
26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?: mmhmm
27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?: Nope
28. Have you ever been cheated on?: Not to my knowledge
29. Have you ever cheated on someone?: No
30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?: I’ve never seriously considered plastic surgery
31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?: I have
32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?: Nope
33. Have you ever had sex with a man?: No
34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?: No
35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?: Ye
36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?: Only briefly
37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?: Yes
38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?: No
39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?: Surprisingly no
40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?: Many
41. Have you had sex so far this year?: No
42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?: Not long, I’m really handsy
43. How long was your longest relationship?: 8 months
44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?: 2 girlfriends, 1 boyfriend
45. How many people did you kiss in 2012/2013?: I’m not sure
46. How many times did you have sex last year?: zero
47. How old are you?: I’m a minor and that’s all u gotta know
48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?: I’d probably ask to talk about it, but ultimately I’d respect whatever she chooses to do. She deserves to be happy, even if it isn’t with me
49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?: How supportive she is!
50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?: Lmao fuck no
51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?: Yesm
52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?: There is, but I don’t really want to get into it
53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?: Yea
54. Is there someone you will never forget?: Yup
55. Share a relationship story.: My current partner and I are still making our stories, and I’d rather keep my other two relationships pretty private. I’m still very close w my ex bf, we actually work together a ton on projects, so I don’t want to share things about him just in case he doesn’t feel comfortable w it 
56. State 8 facts about your body: I’m double jointed in my hips, I have freckles on most parts of my body, I have birthmark on my right calf, I have a mole on my left hand, I have a bad heart, my shoulder blades never settled, my collar bones stick out, I have a weirdly long tongue
57. Things you want to say to an ex: Choke
58. What are five ways to win your heart?: Remembering little things, random sweet texts, not making fun of my interests, being passionate, communicating
59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!): I look really bad rn so I don’t want to post a pic, but here is my selfie tag!
60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?: One year
61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?: How they carry and present themselves 
62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?: Is it bad that the first thing that came to mind was remember my chipotle order...I’m honestly not sure
63. What is your definition of “having sex”?: Any situation where you are pleasuring someone/being pleasured sexually, be it with mouths, fingers, toys, whatever. 
64. What is your definition of cheating?: Doing anything with another person that was not previously discussed with your partner, or was discussed and your partner wasn’t okay with it. Like say you talked about whether or not it was okay to kiss other people and your partner said they aren’t okay with that, but you go and kiss other people anyway, that would technically be cheating
65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?: I’m not comfy answering this
66. What is your favourite roleplay?: Or this
67. What is your idea of the perfect date?: Going to a bookstore and then just wandering around town. I’m also a big fan of lunch dates
68. What is your sexual orientation?: I’m a lesbian
69. What turns you off?: Being rude, and bad breath are the main two
70. What turns you on?: Marking, being rough, dirty talk, good kissers, and like a lot more
71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?: I don’t remember tbh
72. What words do you like to hear during sex?: I don’t feel comfy answering
73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?: idk like get me ice cream or smthn
74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for?: Pretty eyes
75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?: Nothings coming to mind rn I feel so bad. So many people have done really sweet things for me, but I don’t know what’s the sweetest
76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?: The first thing that came to mind was I got Em the giant yarn she’d been eyeing for Christmas like a year or two ago
77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?: I have really mixed feelings tbh. I think that as long as both people are in the same stage of neural development it should be okay, but at the same time im kinda :/// about extreme age gaps
78. What’s your dirtiest secret?: I don’t really have any dirty secrets, I feel like I talk about all the dirty stuff I’ve done
79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?: I haven’t felt jealous in a while, surprisingly. Not sure if that’s good or bad
80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?: Like just a couple minutes ago!
81. Who are five people you find attractive?: My gf, Kat Mcnamara, Karla Souza, Aja Naomi King, Daddy Oreo, Alisha Wainwright
82. Who is the last person you hugged?: My momma
83. Who was your first kiss with?: My oldest friend (that one bf)
84. Why did your last relationship fail?: She was really abusive and I was like :/// no
85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?: Yeet
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