#imagine Mike sneaking out to take cooking classes

[arrowsperpetualcringe]

Headcanon that Mike isn't great at cooking so Ness is the one to cook.

canon.

everything Mike cooks gets burn or set on fire

"better over cooked than undercooked, right?" Mentality

Which is TRUE.....

but also omg sir you can't cook for shit

I'd like to think he'd try to get better at it though.... Having Ness cook when he gets off from a whole day of already doing so and waiting tables has gotta be rough.

So yeah, Mike's not the best at cooking... But I think he'd still try and get better over time as a result

It's cheesy, but it's the thought that counts :)

[beepbeeprichiellc]

Please, please, please, PLEASE tell us what happens in the 74 and 86 promp fill that you did. How is Eddie going to react? Is he going to forgive Richie just like that or will there be angst???????

This took me forever! Sorry…. Part 1, Part 2

Eddie awoke with a painful crick in his neck. 

Not that he would ever complain about it, or the fact that his bed had lumps or that his room was always ten degrees colder than the rest of the house. There were a million things that scratched at his skin but he would never ever tell a living soul. Throwing his floral bedspread over his awkward form he reached over and shut off the blaring alarm, groaning into his pillow. At least it was Friday, the mask he wore around school could finally be peeled off and he could sulk in all the things that weighed him down. It was easy enough, fooling the people at school. They ate right out of the palm of his hand, fawning over the new and improved attitude that he had developed over the past six weeks. Even the losers seemed unaware of the torture he was in. 

If people knew that he had been kicked out of his home, thrown into the night like some kind of dog that his mother had grown out of they would mourn his so called loss. What they would never know was that he-Sonia’s perfect little Eddiebear-had been the one who initiated it, the one who screamed at the top of his lungs until they were black with hate and vulnerability. He had called his own mother a bitch and a whore like he was some delinquent with a vendetta. It was like he was a puppet who had finally pried the ventriloquists hand out of his own ass and made a break for it. In the end he was put out with the clothes on his back and twenty five dollars in his wallet. 

He had made it to the park where he sat until nearly dawn just soaking in what had happened. There was no home anymore, no roof over his head or meals for his stomach. There had been a thought-or rather a person that had popped into his head but his heart hung heavy at the realization that he could no longer go to him-that door had been slammed shut. More than anything he wanted to walk that familiar path, bang on that familiar window and puff his chest out with dignity. Richie would’ve been so proud of him, or at least the memory of Richie would. Eddie had never felt so alone, so lost. With nowhere to go and no one to call he waited for something-anything to do that would keep him alive long enough to see the sunrise. 

That something turned out to be a red haired girl who was cutting through the grass, on her way home. Without a word she had sat beside him and pulled him close which shattered the illusion. Somehow she had known, and in that cold morning he had wept for the person who he had been and also for the person he was going forward. Eddie Kasprbak had died on that bench and he was terrified of what was left. 

There was a knock at his door, “Wake up Eddie, we are going to be late.” 

“Okay!” He yelled back, forcing his body out of bed. Without really thinking about it he went through the motions and made it down the staircase in ten minutes flat. While running his fingers through his messy hair he followed the smell of cooking meat and was surprised to find a full spread on the kitchen table. “What is-”

“Happy Birthday!” The Hanscom family sang, including Beverly who either just got there or had snuck in sometime last night. While Eddie stood there dumbstruck, Mrs. Hanscom came over to him and wrapped her arm around his shoulders, pulling him into a sideways hug. It was warm and inviting, unlike his mothers which had always seemed greedy and cold. 

This woman-Eddie had decided-was some kind of angel. Arlene Hanscom had always wanted a big family but that had been stolen from her the day her husband had come home with a folded flag. Ben mentioned her a few times but Eddie himself had never really met her until Beverly had brought him there from the park. It took literally no convincing-not even a nudge from either Ben or Beverly and before Eddie knew it the spare room was cleared out just for him. Beverly was there nearly every night-seeking comfort after her father had fallen asleep. In that sense, Eddie was jealous. Ben was there-always there for her no matter what shape she was in and never asked for anything in return. It was hard to adjust to but Eddie made sure to do his best not to offend his hosts. 

“Don’t tell us you forgot your own birthday!” Mrs. Hanscom cooed, leading Eddie to his chair. “Eighteen! My, what a fun age.” 

“You really didn’t have to do all of this.” Eddie said, looking up to the woman. 

“Nonsense.” She replied, brushing off his sympathetic look. “A birthday should be celebrated! You are finally an adult Eddie!.” Eddie smiled, it was a thin one that came from somewhere in his chest but it was enough to keep Mrs. Hanscom happy. Turning to the food he felt no hunger, which was more normal than not. 

“So, you are finally the big one-eight. How does it feel?” Beverly asked, shoving a partially eaten sausage into her mouth. 

“I don’t know, the same I guess.” He shrugged. 

“Well we are all going to get together tonight to celebrate.” Beverly shot back, making sure that Ben’s mom was turned away before adding, “Mike’s scoring the beer.” 

“I’d really rather not.” Eddie said to his eggs. 

“Oh come on.” Ben chimed in, “It’s your birthday.” 

Eddie huffed, knowing full well that here was no win in this. The Losers celebrated every birthday the same way since 16, getting secretly shit faced at Mike’s farm and soaking in each others company but that was the thing-Eddie wasn’t really enjoying all the company lately. Things had been shaky between the group, all subtly joining sides after his and Richie’s falling out. Eddie tried not to notice, but the tension was so taught he could play it like a violin. Yet another thing that weighed down on his shoulders. 

After finishing breakfast they walked to school, Beverly talking on about their little get together. Eddie zoned out somewhere between what she was going to wear and what she was going to burn in the bonfire. Eddie nearly jumped out of his skin when a pair of hands grabbed his hips from behind-the noise that came from his mouth was less than manly. Surprisingly, it wasn’t a friend but rather Rick, someone who Eddie had been somewhat seeing over the past month. “Jesus don’t do that.” He scorned. 

“Sorry Eddie, I was just trying to surprise you!” Rick cooed, moving to the space between him and Beverly. His arm slipped around his shoulder making Eddie’s cheeks flush. “You know if you would just let me drive you, I wouldn’t have to sneak around.” 

“Sorry but I can’t let these two walk alone, they would never make it to class.” Eddie’s excuse made Beverly snort. It was a lie, and they all knew it. Only one person had ever driven him to school, it had been a tradition since the trashmouth had turned sixteen and Eddie couldn’t bear to let anyone else take the mantle. 

“It’s okay.” Rick assured, smiling over to the couple as they parted at the double doors of the school. “I get it, your friends mean alot to you.” 

God why did he have to be so perfect, it just wasn’t fair-Eddie didn’t deserve it. In reality, this thing was just something Eddie was using to busy himself with which was a shame because holy fuck-Rick was so sweet. In another world-another universe Eddie could see himself really falling for him but his heart was still swollen and bitter from the last time Eddie had tried to give a piece of it away. 

“Hey Eddie! Happy birthday!” Mike called from just down the hall, ensuring that every person after wished him as well. This made Eddie cringe at the attention. 

“Holy shit, it’s your birthday?” Rick asked, sounding disappointed. “Oh man, I’m so horrible! I didn’t know!” 

“Don’t worry about it.” Eddie muttered, letting Ricks arm fall so that he could get to his locker. “I forgot myself.” 

Rick laughed, the sound something he wished he could substitute for someone else’s. “You forgot your own birthday? Really?” Eddie shrugged, “Okay, how about I make it up to you tonight? I’ll take you out to a movie, your pick.” 

“Can’t.” Eddie sighed, “The gang is getting together to celebrate. It’s kind of a tradition.” It was like venom dripping from his tongue, the annoyance clear as day. 

“Ah I see.” Rick sounded disappointed, making Eddie’s heart clench. “You know Eddie I wanted to talk to you about something. I think I want to-” The bell rang out, silencing whatever Rick was going to say. Eddie shot him a look of sympathy, making Rick’s mouth snap shut. “Let’s talk later.” Rick said, bend down to place a peck onto Eddie’s cheek. This should make Eddie’s stomach flip but all it did was leave him with a sense of emptiness. 

Eddie watched him leave and begged himself to feel something-anything but couldn’t. Giving up he swam through the sea of students to get to this most dreaded period. Without looking around he sat in his seat, right up front. This was the only class he shared with Richie and in the nine weeks following his little slip up they had talked a total of one time and that was just when Eddie was forced to ask him for his notes. It was weird and cold and Eddie vowed to fail before doing it again. 

“Hey Eds.” 

Eddie choked on the air in his lungs at the sound, the voice sending shivers down his spine. There sitting at the desk beside was Richie Tozier himself, wearing his favorite ripped jeans and the hoodie Bill had gifted him last Christmas. Eddie blinked, unsure that he wasn’t imagining the whole thing. “U-Uh yea?” 

“I know we haven’t really talked since well-” His voice trailed off, his hand making a vague geustrue in the air. Clearing his throat he continued. “I just wanted to say happy birthday and to give you this.” Reaching into his bag Richie pulled out a small box gift wrapped in bright colors. He handed it to Eddie-who only starred. “Uh-I got it for you-” Still, Eddie watched, unmoving. “Okay well here ya go.” In slow motion he put the box in front of Eddie, as if afraid that he would scare him away. 

Richie disappeared back into the back of the class and the teacher began to lecture. Eddie could only watch the box, the rainbow Happy Birthday mocking him in every way. Despite his better judgment he pulled apart the wrapping and peeled open the box. 

It was a music box. 

Not just any music box but the one Eddie had fawned over six months ago in that thrift store the group had dragged them to three towns over. As he opened it the ballerina began to dance, the melody floating up towards the sky as if trying to escape the darkness of the world. It was just as beautiful as it had been all that time ago, the porcelain cold and frightening in his hands. 

Oh god, he was going to be sick. 

Grabbing his backpack he bolted from the room, the sound of his own name following him out into the all. There was no stop, not when he met the double doors or when the crisp wind touched his tear streaked face. Eddie had no idea where he was going but he knew that he had to get there before he completely broke down. 

So he kept running. 

What a fucking birthday.

[reddogf13]

Covenant ch 7

summery:  They did it, IT was left to die alone in the tunnels under Derry. months have passed and the losers thrived after what seems to feel like a curse lifting off the town. if only Beverly had not decided to make a last minute deal with IT on its death bed. will her choice to let IT live destroy all that she holds dear?

status: complete

rated: M - fowl language and gore

prev chap: Covenant ch 6

next chap: Covenant ch 8

_____________________________________

~ch: 7 Regrets~

The two under the table glanced at each other in shock. Whipping their heads back around to listen more carefully.

“What do police think happened?” … “Animal attack.” … “I guess.” … “like you said. Children go missing all the time. Its such a shame.” … “don't worry, I'll be fine.” … “Bye.” The conversation ended on a click. The principle jogging out toward the front of the building.

“What was that about?” Eddie asked in whisper.

“I don't know.” She whispered.

“ something killed a kid. … Do you think-”

“No.” Interrupting him. “Not everything is because of IT. It probably was an animal. We do get mountain lions and bears around here. Eddie getting that obvious worried look on his face. Pulling out the inhaler for a puff.

“You okay?” She asked. Getting a nod as he took another puff of his medicine. “Want to visit the nurse? I kinda do need ice actually.” Giving a smile to comfort him.

“Okay.” He nodded. Carefully sneaking out to check if the coast was clear. Waving Beverly to come out of hiding. For the rest of the period they sat in the nurse's office. Shooting each other concerned looks or ones of confusion. Unable to talk about the subject with the nurse sitting less than 10 feet away.

The ringing of the school having them separate. Eddie forced off to class as he was fine by what the nurse saw.

“Still need to ice your ankle?” The nurse asked Beverly. Who was laying back on the thin med beds with an ice pack wrapped around her ankle.

“Yeah, it's still really swollen.” This time not lying. Her ankle hadn't taken all that uneven walking off the crutch very well.

“Okay, but you,ll have to go to your next class in 10 minutes. If it's too bad today, then you can be excused home.” The nurse said before exiting the room back to her small desk.

Beverly sighed from her seat. Staring up at the ceiling on what to do. Did Pennywise not trust her to hold the deal? Did he toss it all aside after their conversation? Was it only a matter of time for some child to be devoured.

“No, this doesn't feel right.” Why go after one random kid instead of her, right then, in the nest? “Not even attempt to pick me off before i made it to school. He had a whole 15 minutes to think it over before i made it. Kill a kid, leave remains to be found so quickly? So much waste of energy for a tragic message? To get us pissed off and then what? It can't have enough energy for a round 2 yet.”

“ IT hibernates, but a bear needs fat to survive. IT needs energy to do the same. No way it collected enough off half an eaten child. He may as well be starting his hunting spree over like he'd just woken up. We know about him, he knows that, so he cant get very far.” Talking it over to herself.

“... I know about him.” Correcting herself. “Nobody else. That's not helping anyone. I keep this secret any longer our-”

“Times up.” The nurse pulled Beverly from her thoughts. “I'll give you a note to class. If it still bothers you, come back to call someone to pick you up.” The nurse reminded her. Taking the ice packs back to storage. Beverly taking her blue slip from the nurse to the class. Going through the usual of sitting through her classes.

Lunch time she went to switch books in her locker. Food service still canceled after Pennywise's sabotage of the cooker. When she opened the small metal door she found another rolled up brown bag. Grabbing it immediately to cautiously open similar to the last time she did. Hit with another strong smell of freshly cooked food.

Pulling out the white food tray to cautiously pop open that next. Inside was a large burger pre cut down the middle for easier eating of the massive half's. A side container sealing a hot batch of mac & cheese next to a mountain of fries.

“Looks normal.” Dissecting each little ingredient of the meal. Hesitantly taking a bite for the final testing of it. Nothing strange, tasting like a normal burger. No sudden appearance of worms or blood oozing. “Okay, no more of that.” Making herself sick off imagination. Packing everything back to share it with the guys.

Books sorted she went outside up to the tree they stayed under for shade.

“Hey guys, i got food.” Holding up the lunch.

Ben looking confused about why she was happy about it. “That from your stalker again?”

Eddie corrected the assumption. “It's from her aunt.”

“What?! So that juicy hunk of steak wasn't tainted?! We could have ate that!” Richie whined at the sky.

“Yeeeah, sorry about that rich. I didn't find out till later.” Beverly halfly apologized. “ i got a big burger if you want some of that.”

“Fuck yes!” Standing by her for the offering.

“Split it with Eddie Handing him half the huge burger. Splitting the giant pile of fries between Ben and bill. Stanley getting the mac & cheese to himself. Her eating the large remaining half of the juicy burger.

Smiling at watching Eddie pick out the tomatoes. Giving Richie the pickle slices who he watched with disgust as he straight ate the pickles plain.

“How can you stand that vinegary taste?” Biting into his burger half while Richie crunched on the pickles.

“No vinegar, tastes salty like Gretas tears.” Joking through chewing.

“You're drinking her tears now?” Beverly laughed.

“After it's filtered with gold.” Taking the official first bite of the burger. Breathing out as he chewed by the unexpected temperature. “Hot,hot, hot!” He chewed through.

“Y-y-you were suppose to blow on it dumb ass.”

“Like how i blowed your mom?!” Richie replied after the food was mostly chewed. Bill waved him off then turned his attention to Eddie

“Did Eddie tell you my idea? It d-d-doesn't matter much now if he didn't. Since the lunch turned out to b-b-be from your aunt.”

“He did. We tried to find out who got my book instead. We guessed it may have been a TA.” Her happy expression dropping. “We didn't find anything, but heard something bad from the principal's office.”

“What was it?” Stanley asked with a toss away of the empty aide container.

“A kid died.” Eddie answered for her. Everybody who was still eating paused for a second.

“How'd they die?” Bill questioned. Beverly noticing how on edge he was already.

“Animal attack.” Eddie answered.

“ has to be-” bill coming to a fast conclusion.

“It's not IT!” Beverly interrupted.

“Why not?” Bill holding back his rage to ask.

“ not every kid death is IT. Derrys never been safe for anyone even when IT hibernated. An animal can kill people once a year. We do get bears, mountain lions-”

“Moose and poisonous snakes.” Stanley added.

“Exactly.” She gestured toward Stan.

“Lets c-c-check the wall then. If there are more posters w-w-we’ll know.”

“I still have detention. If we want to check we'll have to check tomorrow morning. Else i am going to get double the detention.”

“A-a-alright. Eddie, fake an asthma attack and go to the nurse. Say y-y-you need to call your mom. Call mike and tell him we need an emergency meet up e-e-early tomorrow.”

Eddie looked at bill wide eyed. “I can't fake an asthma attack! I think the nurse will figure things out when i say “hey mike! Can we use your car tomorrow to investigate kids dying?” over the phone.”

“T-t-this is important. I know you can pull it off.” Giving faith to the nervous boy.

“Okay, but I better not get detention for this. My mom will never let me see the outside world again. It’d be permanent home school for me!”

Richie jumping in to joke. “At least you’ll have a hot teacher!”

“Shut up Richie!” About to smack the laughing fowl mouth jokester if he hadn't had moved away.

“This is serious.” Bill killed the laughter. “Keep a lookout. W-w-we don't know if ITs here or not.” They all agreed. Anxiety's high with not wanting to speak any more of IT.

The rest of their lunch turning from oddly quiet to words suddenly buzzing among students. Police rolling up in front of the school to meet outside with the principal. Catching the eye of every student to gather a crowd. Kept away by a few more officers. Rumors already being spread of what was going on.

The losers club stuck again at the back. Watching far from any possibility of them figuring out whats going on.

Richie turning to Beverly. “let me borrow your crutch. I cant beat a path to the front!” receiving a glare from her that hid an inner laugh. This was serious and not the best time for jokes.

“hey!” he caught the attention of a kid running off from the crowd. “know whats going on?”

the kid stopped with a grim paled look. “the principals kid was eaten by a mountain lion. They think he was alive during it too.” the kid spoke quickly. Sickened by repeating what he heard he turned green with a rush off to the bathrooms.

The losers turned pale. Looking between one another in shocked silence.

“same kid?” bill asked Beverly and Eddie.

Beverly speaking through a depressed breath of air. “we didn't hear it was his. It didn't sound like it.” looking to the floor, sickened. IT had to be on a killing spree.

When the bell rang everyone was escorted back to class. Moved along by officers as some students kept loitering for the gossip. The classes passed, the end of school came, the losers met back up before leaving the grounds.

“i made the call.” Eddie informed. “he'll pick each of us up around 7 tomorrow morning.”

bill nodded. “set alarms.” glancing over the others who nodded back. Speaking stay safe to each other when Beverly had to leave for detention. Walking the whole way there glaring at the floor. Pissed at IT for what it was doing. Pissed at herself for allowing this to happen on stupid hope that it would. Then there was simply being pissed at her asshole teacher she was heading to detention for. Yet when she walked in she saw the principal sitting at her desk instead.

“wheres Mrs. Bren?” asking the man doing paperwork.

“the breaks on her car failed and she had an accident. Shes fine, but wont be back for a while. For now I am taking up her work until a substitute is found.” he answered, pointing for her to go sit down. Returning back to the work as she did.

Watching him bury himself in paperwork pulled at Beverlys heart. Having to stay late babysitting with papers while grieving at work instead of home. All due to a mistake she made.

“ i-i am sorry about your son.” speaking her condolences as gently as she could. The man paused his writing, but didn't look or even speak to her. A moment of silence passing before he picked up writing again.

She turned her attention to her backpack. Pulling out school work to pass the time. Helping her mind avoid the thoughts of guilt eating at her. How many other kids would they see on the wall? Pushing the thoughts away again. Finishing some homework when the thoughts crept in again. Was IT biding its time? Waiting to have enough energy to gorge itself on children overnight? It wasn't long before she was free to leave. This time making it home at a much more reasonable hour. Greeted as usual by her aunt. Who soon noticed Beverlys low mood.

“you alright dear?”

“i am fine. Hate detention is all. Ill be relaxing in my room until dinner, okay?” covering her real reasons.

Despite feeling that wasn't the truth, her aunt didn't press further. “okay. I'll knock on your door when foods on the table.”

dinner came and passed with little conversation at the table. Through the night she didn't get a minute of sleep. All over the same subjects she worried over. Preparing for the worst at the break of morning. Preparing early before her usual time to leave. Writing a note for her aunt to know she left early. Greeting mike along with a few others packed into the small car like sardines. The air between everyone full of anxiety. The uncomfortable quiet broken by Ben.

“what are we going to do if ...” voice trailing off.

“we fight it l-l-like the last time.” bill answered.

“we couldn't even hurt it once it changed. We don't even know how it could have gotten better either.”

Richie butted in. “ah, some idiot crack head probably stumbled in and gotten eaten.”

“i d-d-don't care.” bill huffed. “this time w-w-we'll beat IT. T-t-then watch it e-e-every day if we have to. T-t-to make sure it stays dead.” his stutter worsening the angrier he got.

Richie chuckled over it all. “calm down bill before you suffer a stroke.”

“s-s-shut up Richie!” bill snapped. Starting his rhyme to break the stutter. “He t-t-thrusts his fists against the post, and still i-i-i-insists he sees the ghost.” repeating it to himself.

“guys! Now's not the time to fight!” Beverly shut them down. “time to get out anyway.” Beverly gestured toward the car window. Mike parking the car not too far from the wall bulletin board alley. Everyone piling out from the car far too small to squeeze 7 inside.

Although she was the first one out she delayed in approaching the alley. Fear having her lag behind everyone. How much irreversible damage was done from her mistake. Bill stomped up to the mouth of the alley where he stopped in his tracks. Starring frozen toward the wall out of everyone's view.

“what is it?” Ben asked with no answer received by the frozen bill. Coming up behind to also peer down into the alley. “ … oh ...” freezing also at what he saw.

The rest of them looked between each other then rushed over. Except for Beverly standing back on a sinking heart watching all the others stop at what they saw. She limped over to stop at the first glance of what she saw.

A wall of white posters.

Layered over and over to make a noticeable bulk. It may as well have been a layer of thick wall paper.

Not a spot of wall showed between the white posters. This wasn't like all the other times. When posters were layered up by three in one spot. Layered here or there with exposed parts of wall in between

All blaring large photos with the massive word MISSING in black.

Some already falling off in chunks under the weight of their stapled stacks. The fallen ones replaced right after by a man stapling on even more. A pile sat near by on a cardboard box for easy reaching.

[theteaisaddictive]

life and death: chapter two.

guess who’s back? back again? this shit’s back! tell a friend!

house rules: bolded with proper punctuation/capitalisation is direct quote from the books. anything else, even if it’s in quotes, will be me shitposting. all misspellings unless pointed out are my own (this includes autocorrects such as ‘favourite’ or ‘colour’)

i’m also going to set up a page with links to all previous liveblogs for ease of access, but for the moment just searching tagged/life-and-death gets all previous liveblogs up

*mario voice* here we go!

The next day was better . . . and worse. ah, i was wondering how long it would take for beau’s emo-ness to show up again. the very first sentence of the next chapter was the answer. but honestly how relatable; things are better because it’s no longer the First Day. things are worse because when playing volleyball, beau didn’t dodge out the way of the ball and hit two of my teammates in the head with one bad volley oh man i feel you, pe’s rough. and worst of all, THE PERFECT ONE isn’t there (i think she’s meant to be in alaska at this point fucking around with the denali sisters?? or i guess brothers in this verse)

McKayla, who was starting to seem weirdly, I don’t know, territorial about me beau you have spent the last four paragraphs imagining confronting a girl you met once about why she doesn’t seem to like you you really don’t have a leg to stand on buddy. beau is conFUSion bc mckayla (swap!mike) is into him and he’s not used to that and honestly?? that’s valid. i spent my adolescence knowing nobody found me attractive and when people finally did there were several ‘does not compute’ messages. beau also ponders the patriarchy, and whether or not he’s uncomfortable because mckayla’s coming on to him, as it were (it’s high school, nobody’s coming onto anyone but you catch ym drift)

oooh, more patches of red fading out of [his] face instead of blushing. beau really has problems with erythema, doesn’t he? he goes shopping and angsts about the beautiful liminal space that is the thriftway, but not before seeing the cullens and their shiny volvo of justice. It seemed like too much for them to have both looks and money. Though, as far as I could tell, life worked that way most of the time. WELCOME COMRADE STEPHENIE IT’S NICE TO MEET YOU. (brosalie’s name is royal. ROYAL. this shit writes itself!)

charlie comes home from work to beat making tea and we get That line about the gun. “What’s for dinner?” he asked warily. Mom was an imaginative cook, when she bothered, and her experiments weren’t always edible. I was surprised, and sad, that he seemed to remember that far back. oh man that is a whole-ass divorced kid mood

omg i forgot how in love with carlisle charlie was this is JUST as entertainig holy fuck. “Dr. Cullen is a brilliant surgeon who could probably work in any hospital in the world [...] We’re lucky to have her -- lucky that her husband wants to live in a small town. She’s an asset to the community [...] Just because they’re newcomers, people have to talk.” It was the longest speech I’d ever heard Charlie make. JUST SAY YOU WANT TO HAVE HER WEIRD VAMPIRE BABIES CHARLIE, IT WOULD BE QUICKER

there's an uneventful weekend which smeyer skips over and we rejoin beau on monday (aka The Day Edthye(ward) Comes Back so buckle up lads). they see each other in the lunch room, and edythe is still presumably confused about her inability to hear beau’s thoughts. he sneaks a look at her and stares long enough for the normies his friends to pick up on it. and now edythe is staring at him, although beau is talking to jeremy (swap!jessica, aka anna kendrick). also i just have to say that i do legitimately find it hilarious how much hatred beau has for the snow. 

BIO CLASS BIO CLASS PREPARE YOURSELVES IT’S THE SCENE WITH THE ONION SLIDES

and finally, our leads talk to each other. 

“Hello,” said a quiet, musical voice. [...] Her perfect face was friendly, open, a slight smile on her full, pink lips. But her long eyes were careful. is beau not being able to describe eyes in a way that make human sense going to be a recurring motif?? or is it just bad writing? you decide!

and these two are awkward fucking ducks, because of course they are. 

“Ladies first, partner?” Edythe asked. I looked up to see her smiling a dimple smile so perfect that I could only stare at her like a fool. you know, for beau being a straight guy he sure reacts to pretty girls smiling the same way that queer women do (beau.exe has stopped functioning due to presence of dimples) “Uh, sure, go ahead,” I sputtered. I saw her eyes flash to the splotches blooming across my cheeks. Why couldn’t my blood just stay in my veins where it belonged? am i missing something or did beau just get a boner in class bc a pretty girl smiled at him and raised her eyebrows.

man, just seeing the words Miss Cullen and Mr. Swan used in a twilight book is bit of a trip, clearly i’m too used to bella being called ‘miss swan’. not a bad thing, just a ‘brains are weird sometimes, huh’ thing.

THEY TOUCHED. THEY TOUCHED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL. Her fingers were ice cold, like she’d been holding them in a snowdrift before class. [beau, to be fair there was a snowball fight going on that you bailed on] But that wasn’t why I jerked my hand away so quickly. When she touched me, it stung my hand like a low-voltage electric shock. was this in twilight?? bc i don’t remember her getting shocked by edward in bio class. anyway, they finish the exercise, beau is a klutz, and then he notices the colour-changing eyes thing. 

they chat a little about why beau came to forks, and edythe is apparently puzzled by beau’s motivations. 

“Did I . . . am I annoying you?”  She shook her head and smiled with half her mouth so that one dimple popped out. [is this meant to be the equivalent to edward’s crooked smile?? GIVE US EDYTHE’S CROOKED SMILE, STEPH] “No, if anything, I’m annoyed with myself.” “Why?” She cocked her head to the side. “Reading people . . . it usually comes very easily to me. But I can’t -- I guess I don’t know quite what to make of you. Is that funny?”

oh man. oh man edythe is that an understatement of what you can do. 

the rest of the day passes uneventfully, aside from mckayla being on beau’s team in gym?? in america do you guys mix genders during gym? because while that happened sometimes here, it was pretty rarely. beau ends the chapter by almost reversing into a car as he pulls out the car park, and [he] could see enough in [his] peripheral vision to know [Edythe] was laughing.