#in any case!!!!!!!! ngl but i really like how close the idols are to their managers in terakado agency~ they’re on first name terms and all!

[deus-ex-mona]

also!!!!!! there’s finally a way to read this guy’s name!!!!! vol 4 be w i n n i n g

[marengogo]

QUICKIE - 4: Queer Realizations and Acceptances

Part of Your World - by Halle  [The Little Mermaid]

[Music is a very big part of my life and I’m MOSTLY INCAPABLE of writing without music, so I just thought I'd share what I am listening to while writing this]

🐺 — 🐺 — 🐺—

Ladies, Gentlemen and Distinguished Enbies, how have you all been?

As I’m writing this, the schedule for FESTA 2023 was just released so, i’ll make sure to post this today, so I can focus on it 🤩🤩🤩.

Hope you haven’t allowed too many pestering things in the fandom ruffle your beautiful feathers. It might seem like there is a lot to be angry about, but IN MY OPINION we keep getting appalled and distracted by the same-ol’same ol’, which, NGL, plays perfectly into the hands of those who want to see us triggered and ignore, for example, ACTUAL ANGER INDUCING shit that has been going on in the industry potentially affecting the members, some more than others; NAMELY JIMIN. BUT the title of this post is Queer Realizations and Acceptances, right? So, forgive me, let me not digress.

From the beginning of this year, I’ve been concentrating heavily on all aspects of my health and thus far, even though it has been so groundbreaking in many positive ways, it has brought about a lot of things I had to face head-on, ready-or-not style. This particular weekend, my family and I met with another family for a nice lunch. During this meeting it was made pretty clear to me that, at this stage in my life, if I were to pursue being my TRUE SELF, a European-born African Queer Woman, with anyone other than my sibling and close cousins, within my family, I would never bring my family any joy, or sense of pride and I would most certainly ostracise myself. And because I also realised that I really love my family, there is really nothing I can do.

These are the cards I was dealt and that I have finally accepted. As a consequence, I have started making my statement clear on my wish to not want to marry, which has liberated me so much; SO FUCKING MUCH. With that weight off my shoulder, the desire to start working on my project has been growing stronger by the day, and with that I also finally came face-to-face with my biggest fear, the one and only reason why I haven’t been able to sit-down and write. I’ve been working on this like half my life, and though it is not the theme it is LGBTQ-heavy, hence I have been feeling literally petrified at the idea of this project somehow ending up catching a public eye or two. Take the infamous situation with Kit Connor, he was basically pushed into having to reveal his sexuality and I CANNOT, AND WILL NOT, HAVE THAT. 

I have been working on this project for so long, it is my baby, so I want it out in the world, but at the same time I also want to keep my family. I know it sounds like a Have your cake and eat it situation, but that is indeed my situation and: I WANT BOTH. Particularly when, to begin with, it is hella unfair for these two things to be mutually exclusive. So as I kept thinking, Jikook came to mind. For all the speculation, all the love, all the hate, all the gossip, all the rumours, all their actions, all their silences … we still don’t have any confirmation, or negation, regarding whether they are straight or queer. So why couldn’t this be me? 

The only big difference I could spot is that differently from Europe and America, in Asia a journalist will not come up and ask you flat out “Are you Gay?” In fact the private lifestyle of an Asian idol, where just dating is a scandal hence everyone keeps it underwraps, and companies also help you to do so if theta re invested in you enough could prove rather beneficial and a good protection unless you get caught of course 😬😬😬. Nevertheless, as I am not in Asia, I do not have that option but I have indeed figured out what I am going to do in my case if that time were ever to arise 🤡😌. Basically, NEVER LET ANYONE FORCE YOU TO COME OUT. I think this is not said enough, but if you don’t want to come out, YOU 👏🏾 DON’T 👏🏾 HAVE 👏🏾 TO 👏🏾.

Now, obviously I don't know if Jikook assuming they are queer would ever want to come out or not, it is a scary world out there and safety comes ALWAYS FIRST. However, ultimately it is up to them, and in the same way I would want people to respect my decision, even if 4 years from now it becomes painfully clear maybe by being the only two members that aren't married but somehow live together that they indeed are, if by then nothing has still been confirmed or denied then; CLEARLY that would have been their answer with that question. Period.

So, if I ever were to get "fans" one day, I apologise in advance for my secrecy in regards, but whatever action I take will be my stance. You will be free to speculate and do all that I am respectfully doing with Jikook at the moment, of course, but just as well, because I would have been on both sides, I also know that you won’t die from lack of knowledge; no matter how badly you want to know. BUT THEN AGAIN who knows, maybe by the time I get to that point the world might have made a complete 360 and being part of the Queer community 🏳️‍🌈 wouldn't be such a problematic thing anymore. I wouldn’t hold my breath on this but, hey, miracles do happen, so I can but hope 😊.

Anyways, enough of my rambling, let's all get ready for FESTA 2023, apparently there already is something on schedule for tomorrow so y'all ... like ... THE OT7 IN MY CAN'T EVEN.

Always respectfully yours,

Marengo.

[samejimamitsunari]

in your mind whats the difference between akijin & jinaki ive seen a lot of diff information floating around, like i always thought it was top/bottom preferences but recently ive seen it mean other things

hi anon, thank you for your ask!

i'm ngl i laughed. really hard when i looked at my inbox. this topic is very funny to me because it's. really not that serious but i'm neurodivergent so i could talk about this in an insane amount. i'm actually really curious what that different information is bc in general communities, it really is just boiled down to the top/bottom preference... let me know!!!!

it's embarrassing to talk about so rambles under the cut

content warning: mention of heavy drug usage, implication of sexual themes

i've had someone ask me about the difference before so i'll use it as reference. this isn't really "in my mind" per say but mere observation of both separate communities (mainly in east asia) and how they characterize them. just thought i'd explain how they're interpreted by a larger community before talking about what i think honestly.

** also to be clear this will be in the context of current jin and akiomi, not their younger selves

akijin fan content

one trait that is heavily amplified within this dynamic is jin's unrelenting guilt due to overshadowing akiomi during their idol era. in a lot of content, jin seems half dead... like a walking corpse. he's unable to set healthy boundaries with not only his relationship with akiomi, but in nearly any type of scenario. in a way, it always seems like jin feels that he owes akiomi for all the pain he let her suffer through. (<- this is very important, as it is a common theme) he doesn't outright say it, therefore expressing it through action. essentially, all of his self-destructive traits are greatly emphasized. (this could also breach into... darker tropes unfortunately or heavy drug usage on jin's end...)

in the case of akiomi, content typically likes the idea of her power tripping over jin considering the fact that she is finally able to be his equal. she has this sense of control over jin that could easily be traced back to her super idol sagami jin obsession, but welded with the deep resentment she holds when she was trampled by him.

there's also the inclusion of one-sided pining. this is mainly in the case of jin, where he feels that his love wouldn't be reciprocated due to the fact that akiomi may love his crossdressing self instead. idk as far as i know, it... implies akiomi is a cishet man and instances where it feels like akiomi wishes jin was a woman instead. i really dont like this idea. it's ooc. because of akiomi's strict nature, it's like. they try to push traditional ideals and gender roles into her character. ugh i dont want to talk about it that much.

all of these factors lead to some art feeling loveless when you look too deeply into it. it's like. looking closely, within all the guilt and resentment, when moments like rainbow are illustrated... there's love. it's there. it's a breath of fresh air after suffocating... mainly because it feels like their situation is never getting better (because neither side communicates their issues... or bother to seek help for themselves. but i believe in them)

ultimately, akijinPs do tend to focus on jin's characterization a lot more. not to say there aren't akiomi biases but. idk. it's feels sticky around these parts. self-destruction and control is a common theme here

jinaki fan content

jinakiPs love the young jin and akiomi dynamic, for sure. i'm not going to focus too heavily on it but its something to keep in mind.

jin has this unconscious responsibility over akiomi due to old habits. said habits are caused by their previous upperclassman and underclassman dynamic, even though they are equals now. this leads to a more capable, cooler image of jin. (not too capable though, of course. but he seems reliable to some extent...) remains to be pathetic but not brooding like the previous dynamic.

it's expected that akiomi would take care of jin more, but in this dynamic, jin takes care of her as well... spoils her? through physical affection. excessive flirting. the likes. idk. shes so girliepop. her super idol jin obsession is mentioned much more explicitly. more easily flustered.

a lot of the content is very domestic...! i think the idea of taking care of akiomi as much as possible is valued highly. it could lead to cases where jin feels extremely protective of akiomi but... again its not realized. (on rare occassions it is)

lots of doujins are cheesy i cringe happily

akijinaki fan content

theres like one. prominent "non-fixed" artist in the jp community. i mean, they lean towards jinaki dynamics but i just know they DGAF and carefully tag if their art is more akijin or jinaki leaning... for the sake of people sensitive to that stuff. though, whenever they draw akijin content, it's nooooonnnnne of that corpse like jin stuff. it's more like "....?! since when did my lil akiyan get so bold...?!" where jin is the flustered one with akiomi's advances while akiomi... is sometimes a little oblivious. hehe (i like dis artist)

thoughts on this

okay so. its not that serious. i have to remind you again. even after explaining all that... just in case because i feel crazy talking about this shit.

but yea. akijin community focuses more on the toxic parts of their relationship that we dont really get to see with jinaki. i think if you look closely at content from both communities from over the years (you can do that on pixiv since a flow of content doesn't even come that often), i guess you can probably get a better idea of what the hell i'm talking about. i'm.... actually unsure if this is understandable by just reading the jin and akiomi stories alone. i wouldn't know

in the end, it does boil down to sexual intent they have for these characters. um sometimes i guess

anyway...? to me? umm. i used to have a preference for akijin when i first got into enstars (mainly because a lot of the content i was first exposed to was from that community). i think it could be talked about even more deeply honestly but i really dont want to get into that.

damn. idk im different from yall i like toxic lesbians as a trans lesbian regardless of "positioning". live a little. also i think the toxicity could be talked about in jinaki. but i do like the mutual possessiveness... codependent lesbians ya.

i love old lesbian chu chu cope. thats what akijin and jinaki mean to me. as simple as it is. (it's not... i just wrote all of this...)

i'm normal i just like old people. thats it.

if you need anything that needs further explaining, let me know...? also i'm still curious where you got the idea that it's not just top/bottom dynamics... thanks for the ask again. i probably sound insane.

[maurenislife]

i hate tiktokers and mf lifestyle youtubers

now before i say anything im not hating

im not even really hating on what you think cause i dont wanna be or have a desire to be known for anything cause thats not even my mode or my goal in life and i dont idolize anything cause im not a sad 16 year old who yearns for a image that i liked and bookmarked on the internet ANYWHO ...

everybody thinks your a instant hater cause ur just jealous...... umm newsflash u fucking junkie whore, whats not meant for me isnt mine to have and whats not done for me i can do myself it takes nothing to get a few coins and prance around in a marble counter cosplay

trust.

Moving foward this whole brigade of wannabe lifestyle whores

they all immolating and channeling which i think is quite impressive down to the candance and lingo etc. its impressive :) all the copy and pasting they do is quite impressive to see, and ill sit with a popcorn bucket and vape to laugh at it all cause its a waste of time.

a long time ago i stopped being jealous of certain lifestyles and things cause once u can attain them or find a way, or figure out how the sausage is made its not that hard and that isnt impressive or even likeable in any sense

people are immulating at a high frequency and the universe can sense imposters and non believers who do not live in. their truth and go cower in fear and just simply conform one thing they will never know if nobody can smell it the universe can sense it even if nobody can see, universe sees, it feels, it calls out, it grasps you

Everybody wants to potray and cosplay a shitty portray aina but what u dont know is lets say even if u make it big, get the sponsorships, the trips reap the benefits of u raping your own life with cameras and tripods what is it all for? fuck money, fuck the gift. fuck the family feeding for just 45 seconds what are you gaining in spirit?

like what in your femmine spirit and the many who have died along the way for you to get here are you proud the answer might still be yes just to stick it to me or it might be genuinely yes cause you in turn think you are very much a success i mean thats what you have been showed and by scoreboard standards band 4 band u beat a bitch >

you didn't though lame you didn't, the inner work didn't completed and i honestly dont give a fuck if a bitch got a isn't for me of why i dont know her and im not in her household,

bitch with your content I AM IN YOUR HOUSE, I AM IN UR BRAIN, your constantly gagging up information every-time u take a bite into a stupid food u bought cause of your audience and everytime u gag up information when you say spend the day with me

we see inside your frame even if its all a act what does that inherently say about you???

You give us yourself and think we got no right to comment

okay enough of jealous prefacing and putting the condom on for yall

Wannabes

These women grew up being ridiculed or extremely loved theres no inbetween because both have the ultimate libido and desire to be seen and heard and viewed in a certain light to get illicit reactions out of other people... its odd ngl

i look at my tiktoks and its all been jokes i crack on me or stuff me and my friends did drunk and just goofing im not saying everybody gotta take that route i do appreciate lifestyle influncers who serve the purpose of showing us the viewer and cost breakdown of spas or vacations or maybe even a resturaunt or things i might wanna go do

like who am i to get mad at them for the sake of curiosity and further knowlege on a place i intend to visit i never been like dope case closed type shit

But if you a wannabe ..........................................................

its a waste of time and energy and your soul and we see it bleeding out for a "look at me mommy" like its sad.....

you can tell the want the mommy to compliment their outfit and the sister to ask where did you learn to do your makeup? and the auntie to ask where can i get that slice of pizza

they want the overall appeal of who is gonna ask me

who is gonna notice me and with each clip you see apart of them kinda just yelling out to the universe not only notice me but award me for being noticed and nobody is gonna do that not even 1 million viewers can set you free,

COPIER

you know the one philposhy thingy of the barnyard picture and like idk ill have to look this up but basically to break it down simply

theres a pic of a farmhouse and soon it gains popularity every mf wants to go and soon its like a disney w a giftshop its copied and copied till it loses its meaning idk look that shit up its a real philosphy and its deeper than what im saying but i ont got time for allat yo

bitches copy till they mf face turn blue and they want it to have the same effect the 1st one did

but the reality remains your immulation ends there

your cleaning the same marble counter like everybody else

taking the same pic on that goddamn boat like everbody else

wearing the same oufit bookmarked and tagged on pintrest like everybody else

its a waste..... why do we need 567,000 copies of the same bitch doing the same shit its lost its meaning besides "you did it"

like ................... no

and i dont wanna be different either and throw my hand in and see who can do it better cause why its so dumb

live ur life like ??? u gone spend ur 20s and 30s chasing after whats not yours ............... no thx

[yandere-daze]

any thoughts abt self aware akatsuki? they seem to be very devoted to their goals and the ones they cherish, while also being especially dangerous at times so im curious as to how you can basically approach the super yandere side of them n all, they seem like some real awesome guys ngl.

Starting this off by saying that I haven´t read too many stories featuring Akatsuki so some of my ramblings may be a bit out of character! I hope you still enjoy this though!

gn reader

tw yandere, obsession, mention of violence

Self-aware Yandere! Akatsuki

I think I mentioned it before in an ask that talked about sticking to Kuro and Souma before but you´d definitely be kept safe from any physical harm if you stuck around Akatsuki. Souma has his sword that he wouldn´t hesitate to use on anyone that threatened you, Kuro who is trained in martial arts and had a delinquent phase, and even Keito was the former captain of the archery club.

They´re all very protective of you and while Keito is more-so the type that wards off the other characters with his words and frequent scoldings, he would be willing to use his bow to eliminate a target if he felt like it was the only option.

Keito is usually pretty strict, even with his fellow members in Akatsuki, so it´s even more noticeable when he gets soft around you. It´s like he´s a completely different person and even though he would occasionally scold you when you got into trouble or were hanging around other idols too much, there would be no bite in his words.

He tries to keep his infatuation hidden from you so he mostly acts on his own urges by instead drawing or writing out the scenarios that he wishes he could enact with you in real life. His stories just happen to be romances where the two main characters strongly resemble both of you. There he can let his thoughts run wild and he can imagine holding you close or kissing you as much as he likes. He wouldn´t admit to doing this, especially not to you, but soon Keito gets commissioned by other idols to draw the same kind of scenarios for them.

He doesn´t like doing it, no doubt about it

Kuro is very caring towards you and doesn´t want you to be scared of him because of his outer appearance. He loves sewing new clothes for you and he also loves seeing you wear them because it´s almost like you´re wearing a part of him. He spends so many hours sewing these outfits too, he´s not sparing any efforts. Also, his little sister probably knows of you from how often Kuro talks about you at home and has more than once asked if you two were dating or when you would finally get married.

Kuro is a very protective yandere, wanting you to be safe at all times, which is why he would stick around you a lot. It´s the best way to make sure nothing happens to you, right? Honestly just having someone strong looking like Kuro standing next to you is probably enough to keep most strangers from ever approaching you. He´s usually not fond of how different his appearance is from his true character, but he feels like in this case it´s very beneficial. For the most part, he doesn´t need to lift a finger to keep you safe.

Of course, that doesn´t work with the other idols that know what Kuro really is like, they´re still going to want to talk to you. So it´s only in these moments where Kuro would actively shield you from “harm” by standing right between the both of you and telling the other person to leave. He doesn´t really want to get violent in front of you, so he holds himself back if he can help it. He´s more likely to “visit” the person later and throw a few punches there where you can´t see what he´s doing.

Souma is probably the one most likely and prepared to commit violence in your honor. He comes from a proud samurai family and so he holds ideas like honor in very high regard. He always carries around a sword and he´s determined to use it to protect the people that he thinks are worth protecting. Naturally, you are one of these people. He looks up to you for all you have done for Akatsuki and him specifically while you were still playing the game and possessing Anzu. You always knew exactly what to say and do to make sure things move along well and Souma greatly admires you for that. It´s no surprise that he puts you on a bit of a pedestal. In his eyes, you can do no wrong and so anyone that opposes you is automatically wrong. His old-fashioned ideals don´t really help him with this black-and-white thinking either.

Souma is also very emotionally driven which only further urges him to protect you from any perceived harm. He´s another one that wants to be around you at all times to make sure that you´re safe. He can´t bear the thought of anything happening to you, the kindest and most gracious person to ever exist. Anyone that disagrees must simply meet the end of his blade.

Different from Keito for example, Souma wouldn´t try to hide the fact that he´s pretty obsessed with you. He´s honest to a fault and thus likes to proclaim how important you are to him and how he would do absolutely anything if you asked him to.

The serious tone in his voice tells you that he isn´t joking around.

[writerofthecourt]

ushijima, sakusa, iwaizumi, and shirabu being protective of their mute!girlfriend

warning: some bullying and harassment, very slight time skip spoilers, slight mention of injury and blood

a/n: for you, anon! i hope you guys enjoy

EDIT: this is a reupload because tumblr kept deleting me from the tags

ushijima wakatoshi

honestly, you guys were a weird couple

ushijima’s a man of few words, while you’re a person of no words

tendou was 100% convinced that you guys had some weird couples’ telepathy going on

(no one tell him that it’s just text messages and a pen and paper)

for the most part, everybody at shiratorizawa was cool with your relationship

everyone except for ushijima’s fangirls

“i don’t know what he sees in her. she’s not even that pretty”

“maybe he likes charity cases”

you ignored the two girls as they followed after you, your indifferent attitude only further fuelling their anger

“oi, [l/n]. don’t ignore us. you really think you’re too good for us just because you’re dating ushijima-kun?”

“he’s probably just taking pity on you since no one else would want your mute self”

their insults didn’t stop, not even as you approached the gym

“why does ushijima-kun even bother with you?”

“yeah, he would be so much better off without you”

it was at this time that ushijima had just returned from refilling his water bottle and happened to overhear the conversation

“i’d have to disagree with you,” your boyfriend proclaimed

“u-ushijima-kun, where did you come from?” one of the girls stuttered

“[y/n] is a wonderful person, and i’m lucky to have her,” ushijima continued unwaveringly. “i don’t agree with your comments. apologize to [y/n] at once”

at this point, the two girls knew that there was no winning in this situation

they exchanged a nervous glance with one another before hastily throwing out an apology. “s-sorry, [l/n]”

you tried not to smirk as the two girls quickly walked away, embarrassed that their idol had seen them in such a bad light

you sent your boyfriend an appreciative smile before he happily took a hold of your hand and led you towards the gym

in conclusion: no words were needed when the two of you were together

sakusa kiyoomi

when news broke out that you and sakusa were dating, sakusa was livid

not only was it an invasion of privacy, but the fact that it was atsumu’s fault made sakusa even more mad

the idiot forgot to crop you and sakusa out of the background of his stupid selfie

#sakusaandmysterywoman started trending online before sakusa had to eventually tell everyone the truth

“[y/n]’s my girlfriend. leave us alone,” was all sakusa tweeted before social media caught on fire and exploded

like with any celebrity dating scandal, there was some backlash from the fans, especially from the crazy ones who accused you of stealing away their precious omi-kun

eventually, everything settled down, and the fans became a lot more supportive of you and sakusa’s relationship

this led sakusa to being more comfortable about sharing pieces of his relationship with you online

although he was clearly happy, this didn’t stop his overzealous fans from constantly insulting you

“why does [y/n] never say anything when omi-omi gives her a compliment?”

“ngl [y/n] seems kind of rude. i feel like sakusa deserves better”

“omi-kun should be with someone who’s actually worthy of him. [y/n] ain’t it chief”

the only reason why sakusa didn’t respond to any of these people was because you told him not to, and he wanted to respect your wishes

it wasn’t until an especially concerning tweet about a fan “paying you a visit” that sakusa finally had to put a stop to all of this nonsense

“to anyone insulting or even going as far as to threaten my girlfriend, just stop. if you can’t support my decision, then i don’t need you. you are not a ‘true’ fan. i love [y/n], and i’m happy with her. to all of you who have been supportive of my relationship with [y/n], thank you. i don’t say this enough, but i truly appreciate you guys”

after sakusa’s tweet, #omi[y/n] started trending in support of you and sakusa’s relationship, which finally put a stop to all of the online hate

in conclusion: blame atsumu

iwaizumi hajime

when iwaizumi asked if you wanted to go see a movie with him on the weekend, you were over the moon

you knew just how busy your boyfriend was with volleyball practice, so you weren’t too pushy when it came to dates

you made sure to put a little extra effort into your outfit and appearance that day because you wanted to look cute for you boyfriend

unfortunately, this also caught the eyes of guys other than iwaizumi

“hey, cutie. you by yourself?” a flirtatious male close to your age asked. “i wouldn’t mind keeping you company”

you tried not to blanch as you took a step back and shook your head, indicating that you weren’t interested

this did nothing to dissuade the flirtatious guy, as he offered you a charming smile. “you can pick the movie if you want to. come on, it’ll be fun”

you were about to walk away when an all too familiar arm securely placed itself around your shoulder in a protective hold

“leave her alone. she’s not interested,” your boyfriend scowled

“says who?”

“says me. got a problem?”

“w-whatever, man. you can have her”

as the flirtatious guy began to walk away, the harsh glare on iwaizumi’s face soon transformed into worry as he turned to look at you. “sorry i’m late. are you okay? you’re not hurt, right?”

you nodded your head in reassurance while offering iwaizumi a gracious smile

your boyfriend smiled back before placing a gentle kiss just below your eye

“i’ll always be there to protect you, okay?” iwaizumi reminded you

you nodded your head once again, never doubting him for a moment

in conclusion: don’t mess with the seijoh arm wrestling champion

shirabu kenjirou

for the most part, you liked being the manager of the boys’ volleyball team

the shiratorizawa players were always chaotic and funny, and you were proud to call yourself a part of the team

although, if there was one thing to complain about, it would definitely have to be some of their fans

you were in the middle of bandaging shirabu’s injured finger when a chorus of high-pitched cheers rang out from near the gym doors

“[l/n], go deal with that,” coach washijo grumbled in annoyance

you sent your boyfriend an apologetic smile before signing to him to continue applying pressure in order to stop the bleeding

grabbing your pen and notebook, you wrote down a quick message before walking over to where the three girls were standing

please keep your voices down, your note read

“we’re just cheering on the players," one of the girls said

"yeah, what’s wrong with that?” another girl remarked

you’re distracting the players from practice

“well, must be easy for you since you can’t even seem to speak at all,” the last girl replied mockingly, followed by the laughter of her two friends

shirabu, who had been listening to the conversation, immediately got up from the bench to go stand next to you

“you three have been nothing but nuisances this whole time, and everyone agrees with me,” shirabu snapped furiously. “if you can’t be quiet, then leave!”

after shirabu’s angry outburst, the three girls promptly quieted down

you’re too nice, your boyfriend signed after the two of you returned to the bench

well, you know what they say. opposites attract and all that

oh, shut up

you only smiled in response as you finished bandaging shirabu’s finger before pressing a light kiss to the back of his hand

“stop mocking me with your cute couple-y-ness!” tendou screeched from across the court, having just witnessed your adorable exchange

“tendou! five laps around the school!”

in conclusion: stop yelling in the gym!

[daesungindistress]

I really thought they would finally stfu but ofc now they're saying the judge's decision was wrong and based on no evidence, that the reliability of the witnesses should not have been questioned and that the sentence is too high compared to yoo inseoks. ngl their whole argument of the sk justice system being unjust and out to get their poor oppa is starting to look lowkey racist to me (aside from the more obvious problems with it). 99% don't even speak korean. How the fuck would they even know? I doubt they know shit about the country let alone its legal system. How dare they claim all these law professionals involved in this case are dumb and incompetent. How dare they speak over korean's women's voices just because their fave got involved in some shit. They make it seem like the korean people and kvips are dumb and brainwashed because they refuse to believe that pos. Even on the off chance that he isn't guilty of all of his charges. He's a rich man. He can appeal. He can probably just be a good boy for a year and then get out somehow. Why are they so worried for him? Why do they continue to refuse to let people just move the fuck on? They ask for justice but will not believe any verdict besides one that comes from their own beloved idol's mouth. Besides... Even if the government and jurisdiction there were corrupt, wouldn't it be the other way around? Wouldn't they favour the famous rich guy? What would they even be gaining in witch hunting him? Hubris much? Absolutely shameless and disgusting the lot of them.

👏👏👏

I almost don't want to say anything because this is so good already, but... a few comments:

1) "the reliability of the witnesses should not have been questioned" -- I've read many reports and not once have I seen the reliability of the witnesses questioned? Not saying it isn’t possible, just that I haven’t seen it reported. I do know, however, that Seungri's reliability was questioned. It was said that from the police investigation to the prosecutor's investigation to the court proceedings his statements were inconsistent and lacked credibility. And they DID. Especially if you take into account his statements to the public, of which there were plenty. Most notably that Chosun interview that he got out there and gave while he was a primary suspect in the middle of a criminal investigation.

For example, the chat that shows Seungri instructing Yoo & Co to find prositutes for their investors at Club Arena... Seungri's excuses, in chronological order:

"The chats are fabricated." (this was the first chat to be released and the first one he responded to publicly)

"The chats aren't fabricated, I just didn't remember them."

"I don't know why I said that. I think I was drinking."

"It isn’t about sex. It's a phrase that means something else and is used by young people. You old folks wouldn't understand." (regarding the phrase "girls that give it good")

"It was a typo due to my phone's autocorrect function."

Another example: how about that confession he made at his arrest warrant hearing in May 2019? You know, the one that his zealous fans will insist until their dying breath was "all media lies"? He admitted in front of a judge, "I had sexual relations with a female employee of an adult entertainment establishment after paying money," said it was "difficult to admit" because of his celebrity status, and claimed he was "reflecting." It doesn't get any clearer than that! But somehow, over a year later when his trial officially began, that very detailed confession of his turned into "I don't remember. But if I did sleep with her, I didn't know she was a prostitute."

???

He actually addressed this in one of his final hearings. He tried to explain away his changing statement by saying that he had only admitted to it because the woman did, and if she said it happened, he thought he had no choice but to agree (?!) but when he reviewed her testimony he found it "unreliable." And just like that he didn't remember after all.

Y'all. What the hell. Who does that? Who, despite being unsure of the validity of a criminal charge against him, confesses anyway? Certainly not someone as careful and calculating as Seungri. What most likely happened is he analyzed her statement to police and found holes in it that he thought he could exploit. At least he confirmed that the confession at the warrant hearing was real and his stans can finally shut up about it being a made-up media conspiracy. But of course we know they won't. They won't.

2) "the sentence is too high compared to yoo inseoks" -- Of course Seungri's sentence is more severe than Yoo Insuk's. Yoo pleaded guilty to all but one of his charges at his first hearing (the embezzlement charge he only partially agreed with), saving the court a great deal of time and effort in closing his case. Seungri, on the other hand, pleaded not guilty to all but one of his charges. Seungri went into this knowing full well that by fighting the charges and making this a headache for everyone he was risking a harsher penalty should he be found guilty. That's how it works over there. His unrepentant attitude and refusal to accept responsibility and reflect were reasons explicitly given for the prosecution’s requested 5-year sentence. He gambled with the legal system and he lost.

You'll also see his fans crying foul at CJH and JJY getting shorter sentences. Actually, CJH and JJY received higher sentences initially (5 years and 6 years respectively). The reason they are lower now (2.5 and 5) is because they wouldn't accept the results and appealed their cases to death.

3) "their whole argument of the sk justice system being unjust and out to get their poor oppa is starting to look lowkey racist to me" -- They've been highkey racist about this since the beginning. You'd be appalled to see some of the blatantly xenophobic things they've spewed to me about Koreans entirely in defense of Seungri.

[coffeeshoptalkks]

nct 127 kibbe types

key: (D) dramatic, (SD) soft dramatic, (FN) flamboyant natural, (N) natural, (SN) soft natural, (DC) dramatic classic, (C) classic, (SC) soft classic, (FG) flamboyant gamine, (G) gamine, (SG) soft gamine, (TR) theatrical romantic, (R) romantic

the boyss ! ! ! 

taeil: SG? little unsure about this one... i considered R but his limbs are longer than an Rs would be but i would probably say he has a R essence as flowier fabrics like this look good on him

relatively large head in comparison to body

isnt delicate the way a TR would be

also TR lines don’t look great on him

im so sorry i always use ten for TR but like, TRs are freaking hard to type and hes non ambiguous so whoops

you can really see the contrast here

i feel like they always style him as a FG? and he just doesn’t have the yang to handle it 

think all the hair colors, excess excess amount of details that ty wears a lot

johnny: SD - sliGht C undertone 

long and lanky ass balloon man

thats all i got... jk. kinda

not a D, too much yin.

i’ve seen FN but really, hes not frame dominant, just looks tallish with a little squish in him

handles details decently well - oversized isn’t the best look

the reason i said a tiny c essence/undertone is because i prefer him in more minimalist SD clothing, more detail does start to look a little ridiculous (i promise i mean that in the nicest way possible lol, don’t come for my entp ass)

the classic comes in cause he looks PHENOMENAL in traditionally classic lines with a little umph and also looser classic lines (the yin in SD)

i needed to include this masterpiece

taeyong: FG. ah yes, the debate about ty... some argue D but he just doesn’t have the vertical line

(sitting somewhere btween D and FG, but FG fits better)

obviously a yang type

but you immediately remove any sort of natural and SD cause he isn’t wide and he isn’t squishy

doesn’t have the vertical line for a D, even from a lower angle you don’t look at him and go “yes, hes really tall” and thats what Ds are really about

it doesn’t matter how tall someone actually is, its how tall they appear to be, and taeyong just looks his height

think about how well ty carries every concept

thats a FG thing. (i can’t find the exact quote but a staff member said that its really interesting to style ty because u can put so many elements on him without it overpowering him

yuta: FG. if taeyong is a FG then so is Yuta

somewhere on the spectrum between FG and D but has to be put in FG just cause a dramatic’s first and foremost trait is vertical line

my next guess would be SD but really he doesnt have enough yin in him, hes all sharp

but because hes sitting somewhere in between he’s not gonna carry as much detail as a “purer(?)” FG

hes 100% yang based but doesn’t have the vertical line of a pure D

this looks phenomenal

he looks like a friggin anime character excUse me sir

i’m fine no i’m not

doyoung (dongyoung): SD. i’ve seen DC, and i do get the argument, but he isn’t as sharp as a DC would be.

you take a look at this and he just isn’t sharp in the way that seonghwa or vernon are

hes definitely a yang type but hes got an undercurrent of yin 

how do i explain this

SDs actually have a lot more yin than DCs despite them being placed closer to dramatic in a lot of graphs. (you know the ones i’m talking about)

even if you could make an argument for vertical line (as i think doyoung has a moderate to long one)

kai (a DC/C) is over 180 and yes he has a vertical line, but he has more yang than doyoung - hes just more boxy and has less yin

when i’m having trouble typing an idol i start looking really heavily at outfits and how they suit each style

doyoung just doesn’t make classic suits pop in the way a DC would

he looks restricted and needs a little extra yin detail to match 

the neck scarf with the draping absolutely ties this look together and he absolutely rocks it

he just doesn’t give me DC vibes and i really do think that SD fits him better

jaehyun: SC. leaning on pure classic with some sort of yin essence

okay, ngl i had problems with this one

I saw somewhere (probably reddit lmao) that jaehyun has a SD head on a not SD body... and i couldn’t agree more

my first instinct was to go to SD but really, he doesn’t have the vertical line and details don’t feel right

idk if its just how he’s styled but i really can’t find an era where i lOve what jaehyun is in

i genuinely think he’s just a larger boned SC with some SD mixed in with a weird combo of essences

a good example of a SC ish look is this where you can see the moderate vertical line (despite being 5′11/180)

it might be my personal bias coming in but i really do like him in more minimal and somewhat looser clothing opposed to him drowning in details

this confuses me cause it feels like it should work but it doesn’t...

this looks awesome this is pretty darn decent but i still feel like something is missing 

i compared jae’s vertical line to the SC poster boy joshua (svt 5th from the left) and kai (DC/C) and felt they josh’s was pretty similar but really, i wouldn’t rule out any of the classics or SD

idk if its just how he’s styled but i really can’t find an era where i lOve what jaehyun is in

tldr: big boned SC and thats as close as i’m gonna get lol

mark: FG. pretty self explanatory lol

leaning yang but obviously not a natural or (S) dramatic or classic

leaves you with FG

very sharp facial features

sharp sharp sharp

and a decent vertical line (looks his height ish)

rocks pretty much every hair color on the planet

if you asked me to nail down an essence i wouldn’t be able to hes just a FG lol

jungwoo: FN. classic essence

heres my problem with jungwoo... like jaehyun his type gets really ambiguous cause of essences not matching his actual body type (classic essence, FN type in this case)

because really, hes just too tall to be a DC,

too box like for SD

and his skin is much too yin to be a pure D (he is very squish, a true D - wonwoo svt is taught and yang through and through)

and once you rule out DC cause of height you’re kinda left with??

but his vertical line is just too prominent to be a DC, but hes not as shoulder heavy as most FNs and just?

*insert clown face*

a DC wouldn’t carry an oversized outfit like this

i actually like him in stuff like this, if not a little less oversized, he just looks so cozy

this gets close-ish but he looks a tad bit constricted

the reason i finally just gave in to FN is cause its as close as i think i can get. SD and D aren’t right, hes not a SN or pure N (jun svt) and in this pic (and others) you can kinda start to see that he IS actually more frame dominant than you first expect. (think like yanan pentagon, - minus the shoulders - super long limbs, lanky but still relatively squarish)

so FN it is

tldr: FN with a classic essence cause really thats (imo) the closest and best option you have and confused kpop fan 

haechan (donghyuck): G. right now i would put him in pure G but he might hit FG at some point in the future cause he isn’t 21 in international age and his type is still settling

boom vs resonance

okay its not that different but i sWEar hes picked up more yang somewhere

not a SG because his isn’t absolutely massive in comparison to the rest of his body 

chenle i’m looking at you (fifth from the left)

moderate to short-ish vertical line

sharp jawline vs squish face but he doesn’t have the sharp yang of a FG (mark)

just still got some squish on him 

[fmdtaeyongarchive]

q3 2021 update & plot call !!

below the cut, you can find an update on ash’s current life, career (or rather absence of), and development for quarter three, as well as plot and thread ideas! if you see anything that you’d like to plot out or write with him, like this or message me, and we can get to it! i have a lot in mind about where ash is right now, so i might add more and expand later on!

mentions of ash’s continuing struggle with mental illness under the cut in case you don’t wanna read that rn

professionally

ash is on hiatus the whole quarter so... not much going on here.

uhh basically the first two days of july he was still trying to get bc to let him take a break so schedule threads could be set then if they cross paths at the bc building! he’s going to be participating in concert rehearsals for knight to a less intense extent since bc, as of the beginning of his hiatus, fully intends him to participate in the concerts. he’ll miss about the first half of the tour, but in july and august he’ll still be attending knight tour rehearsals some to keep up. schedule threads can also be done then!

(note that he’ll be missing the bc city concert as well — i don’t see him dropping by just to support either tbh, sorry bc ppl. white knight duo ver tho let’s gooooooooooo)

ash will eventually start writing music and finding his love of that again though and that’s pretty much the most work he can do during his hiatus, so it’d be cool to maybe have him write, compose, or produce for a few people that might be releasing later this year or sometime next year if anyone is interested? :) we can see if ash would work for it. there’s also opening for him to ask a few people he’s close to to sing some demos for him when he starts trying to write again!

personally + plot ideas!

explaining how he got to his hiatus would take me all day but he basically forced bc’s hand in letting him take time off (well, he wanted to leave knight and retire ngl but his manager was like... you know that’s not going to happen let’s try a hiatus <3). you can read my badly-written solos for part of it (i still need to write more) but generally, the most other muses might know is that they might have run into him acting kinda moody/down or impulsive/irresponsible lately, he made a very uncharacteristic post on social media that hinted at being unhappy with his life currently and losing passion/excitement for even the things he used to value most highly before his social media was deactivated by bc lmaaooo. the post would have probably conveyed Something was up it it wasn’t like genuinely super triggering-level content i promise !! bc released a statement shortly after stating he’d be going on hiatus without mentioning a definitive end date.

so there’s the possibility a muse might have checked up on him after that post / the hiatus news to see how he was doing?

tbh ash isn’t going to be seeking out meeting new people during his hiatus. he’s taking time to himself and is only going to make any effort to hang out with people he’s comfortable with. those he’s not close to, he’s going to have to interact with by running into unintentionally.

he’s getting a place in jeju in the early-ish part of his hiatus. he’ll be spending a lot of time there at first because he just wants to get away from seoul, so it’d be nice to set some threads there if your muse has the time to hop over to visit him if they have anything resembling a free day. (again a certain level of closeness would be necessary, but i think one good heart to heart conversation beforehand could bring someone closer to him enough for that rn! even over text tbh lmao). chuseok would be a really good time for this !! i imagine catching up over lowkey dinners or heart to hearts under the stars, that found family ash has actively fought having lol

(that place in jeju is also going to be where he starts to want to write music again too, so music based stuff there would be chill?)

heart to hearts in general anywhere would be really good for ash right now so please give me those! they can be in seoul too for sure.

he’ll be moving into a new apartment in seoul eventually, though that will probably be a little later in his hiatus? he had some bad fan/sasaeng run-ins right before his hiatus and having so much time off makes him realize he wants to move. someone can help him house hunt or if someone else is looking for a place, they can talk together about it. i want him to realize he wants to move into a smaller place that can feel more like home

once he does move, muses are free to come over and help him set up / be his one-man housewarming party. that’s a little down the line tho !! so we might not want to plot that as a thread to write right this instant

he may also be getting a pet ! muses can come look with him at a shelter or he can run into people there!

this would be a little later in his hiatus, but it’d be interesting if once he’s doing a little better, he gets the urge to dance and runs into a muse at the dance studio. idk that he’ll ever fall completely back in love with dancing, but he might rediscover some of what he did love about dancing and ash and this muse often run into each other as he visits that dance studio a little more often and they eventually bond over it / do some dancing together.

those who still really have that passion for making music ash has lost, talk to him about it <3 he misses it. he might cry but tbh he’s liable to cry in any thread

he’s cutting his hair short and dying it back to black this month, so it would be possible to run into him at the hair salon!

ash will want to be inside at home mostly at the beginning of his hiatus, but as it goes on, he’ll start to branch out and that will offer some more opportunities to hang out. he’ll try not to go to bars and clubs really, but small music venues or jazz lounges, small indie cinemas, galleries, those kind of things will be up his alley

idk that there’s much plotting to be had around this, but this long hiatus on top of the other hiatuses he’s had and his acting out before this hiatus is going to make some of the bc team realize it might not be super wise to keep pushing him hard as a cf model (and in the long run, just less of pushing him as a major idol star within the company in general tbh) so he’ll be able to get some more tattoos and piercings and will become more comfortable, hopefully, with presenting himself how he wants to be seen / having some development in that good ol’ lack of bodily autonomy aspect ash has always had going on. he’ll be coming out of hiatus living much more of his 2021 jk fc truth with the full sleeve and the eyebrow piercing .

uhhh ? pretty far down the line but i’ll mention it while it’s on my mind :) i think it’d be cool if ash did a collab (mini-)album (or two?) at some point after getting off hiatus. i’d want it to be someone he really clicks with creatively (though they don’t have to be a songwriter — i can see it working as collaborative songwriting or as ash feeling really inspired to write for them) and wants to work with since it’s not going to be something he’s letting bc push him into it at that point, and something that just happens organically. realistically, this would work with a female vocal best by far, maybe a male rapper just based on the songs ash does / i can see him doing. probably wouldn’t want to commit to anything fully rn unless it really clicks but i wanted to throw the idea out there :)

uhmmm?? ig i should also mention ash will be paying attention to his health both mental and physical he’s been neglecting for a while. there isn’t too much to say regarding plotting here because he needs to handle it himself with trying new therapy, medications, understanding there’s some stuff beyond “just” his depression going on. coming to accept nothing’s ever going to be perfect, but that self-awareness and effort can help more than denial can. not super plot potential-y but i’ll mention it since this is all the personal update section

basically, ash is taking time to recover mentally (and physically) and ultimately hopefully leave hiatus in a better place than he started where he can be more comfortable in his career, even if just a little bit, in himself, and in his life. if he can have some good, developing threads during the time, that’d be great!

[twicepinkmeup-imagines]

Hirai Momo ; it’s you & me against the world... right?

writer’s note : alright ngl this request honestly intrigued me because i was wondering what would actually happened if a surprise went wrong and how heartbreaking would that beeeee!!! ok so sorry if its angsty as hell in the beginning but i promise there’s light at the end of the tunnel hehe

warning : angsty as hell but reward towards the end 🤩

tips : my gay babies, u know i LOVE reading with a music background so TRY IT!!!!! For the angsty part, I was listening to Only (Live from the Royal Albert Hall) by RY X & i’m not gonna lie, it stung a little 😢 but as the angst began to go and the happy part came in, i listened to Canada by Lauv 🥴

words : 4,063 words

xoxo

6 months.

That was how long since Y/N last saw her girlfriend, Momo. 6 months and when she saw the opportunity arise, she grabbed it immediately.

Being close friends with the rest of Twice had its perks. That said, Y/N got a message from Sana saying that she’s got an extra ticket because her mother couldn’t make it and the concert was in Kyoto— right in her girlfriend’s hometown and she couldn’t let that opportunity slip.

Packing and getting ready for the surprise wasn’t that hard, much to Y/N’s surprise. She managed to get the help of all the girls and she urged them to keep her girlfriend distracted until the day she arrived, which was a day before their Kyoto concert.

She managed to bring along Momo’s extra clothes that the other girls had mentioned she forgot to bring and also her favorite teddy bear to sleep at night; ‘Bearing’ from Singapore.

To say she was tired was an understatement but the cheapest flight to Kyoto was only available at dawn and she sacrificed her sleep for the sake of seeing her girlfriend.

Arrival in Kyoto was a breeze as Jihyo managed to get one of the managers to pick her up at the airport but of course, Y/N had insisted to pay for the hotel room herself because they’ve already done so much for her.

What she was scared of, was the surprise.

For some odd reason, Sana had informed her that Momo hadn’t been in a good mood lately as netizens started to spread a rumor regarding Momo dating a non-idol; which is Y/N, obviously.

Y/N understood where Momo came from, as the latter had told her stories about the days she had to go through after her previous relationships had gone public and she felt as if she had brought the group’s image down.

Momo had also admitted that after people found out about any of her prior relationships, she felt a sense of anxiety and sad, because all she ever wanted was to be a human being, who happens to fall in love once in a while.

However, Y/N was optimistic and careful, making sure that every move she made was far from any paparazzis or overly obsessed fans. She made sure to use casual attire too, nothing that was standing out too much.

Not long after arriving at the hotel, she settled down quickly and changed into a different set of clothes before Y/N insisted on taking the cab to avoid any suspicious fans following the van or paparazzis alike. Arriving at the venue was simple but getting through the restricted entrance was another thing.

Y/N was given a pass, an employee pass from the managers, and she knew getting in wasn’t that difficult but then again, she was trying to avoid any pictures being taken so nothing could be blown out of proportions if the worst were to happen.

Thankfully, the cab had dropped her off pretty far from the public eye and she managed to get through easier than expected.

Upon arrival, she was greeted with the group’s managers and also a few of the members such as Sana, Dahyun and Jihyo.

“Oh! Thank God, you’re finally here!” Sana rushed to her, her expression worried and also a bit tired.

“We were waiting for you!” Dahyun admitted.

Y/N then furrowed her brows in confusion and asked, “Why? What happened? Is Momo alright? Did she find out about the surprise??”

“No, no, she doesn’t know a thing but her mood’s been off the whole day for some odd reason,” Jihyo explained, her face laced in worry as she added, “We heard from Nayeon that she’s been harassed online again because someone found out that she currently is dating someone.”

Not knowing what to do next, Y/N questioned, “So, what should we do? Should I still surprise her or...?”

The three girls looked at each other momentarily before Jihyo sighed and gave a kind smile while saying, “Of course you should— I mean, you came all this way to see her; you deserve to see her after all the trouble.”

“But just to be sure, we’ll make sure to go somewhere else when you surprise her, just in case if she, you know, breaks down and rants to you.” Dahyun chuckled awkwardly as the two other girls nodded in agreement.

Y/N sighed audibly with pursued lips as she nodded while saying, “Okay, where to next?”

xoxo

“Momo-ya, can you wait here for a moment? We need to take our shoes from the car.” Jeongyeon said, the other girls fiddling nervously and hoping that the plans goes through.

Momo furrowed her brows in confusion as she sat on the couch with her phone in her hands before she asked, “Eh? Shouldn’t I come along?”

The girls had a temporary panic before Nayeon smoothly jumped in and explained, “Yours is already here but we took the wrong ones.”

Still confused but not really in the mood to question anymore, Momo simply nodded and looked back at her phone.

She misses her girlfriend and the 6 long months that she hadn’t seen Y/N, was really starting to take a toll on her. Nonetheless, after trying to call her multiple times with no success, Momo simply sent her girlfriend a text message.

To : baby jokbal 🐽 [7:31pm]

where are you? 😢

To : baby jokbal 🐽 [7:31pm]

i havent heard your voice the whole day and i feel like i want to cry so please call me back

To : baby jokbal 🐽 [7:32pm]

i love you, miss you and i hope you’re safe 💖

Sighing, Momo put her phone away as she leaned her head back against the head rest before she felt a pair of hands covering her eyes and a familiar voice talking to her.

“I don’t have to call you back because I’m already here, jagiya.”

This caused Momo to gasp in surprise before she stood up instantaneously, looked at her girlfriend who was grinning excitedly at her but for some reason, Momo couldn’t reciprocate the same way.

“Y/N?? What are you doing here??” Momo asked worriedly, making her way in front of her girlfriend before she dragged her away from any doors so no one could barge in on them.

Confused by the cold welcome, Y/N simply brushed it aside and chuckled, “To surprise you, of course!” She giggled warmly before adding, “I missed you and a friend had a spare ticket so I flew over-“

“Why didn’t you discuss it with me first??” Momo questioned, her tone harsh and her lips frowning before she added, “What if someone had taken a photo of you at the airport and it went viral??”

Still trying her best to stay optimistic, Y/N placed her hands on Momo’s arms while saying, “Honey, I made sure no one-“

“How sure can you be???” Momo hissed, shrugging off her girlfriend’s hands from her arms before she huffed, “Why couldn’t you just wait for me back home??”

“Momo-“

“Don’t you know what damage you could’ve done if someone caught us together because of your stupid surprise?!”

Suddenly, the room went pin-drop silent with the sounds of the air-conditioner being the loudest sound there is. The warmth that Y/N was feeling, disappeared as quickly as her smile on her lips. Instead, it was replaced with disappointment and a slight anger.

Y/N looked at her girlfriend with disbelief, her brows creased and her lips finally frowning. Did she really just hear that? After all she did, this is what she got in return? No ‘hi, how are you?’ or maybe, ‘hi, i’m happy to see you’?

“A stupid surprise?” Y/N choked out, her voice weak as she wistfully questioned, “This is a stupid surprise for you? I didn’t sleep and eat just so I could catch the flight to get here and all I get is ‘this is a stupid surprise’? Wow - just wow. So much for a welcome, babe.”

Momo finally processed the words that she had said but that sense of fear she had over the word of mouth, was still overwhelming her. Her eyes had gotten glossy but her eye contact with her girlfriend remained as she replied, “You know how much trouble I went through when I got caught before and I told you that people took photos at times we least expect it-“

“Momo, did you really think I was that careless??” Y/N contended, her tone slightly harsh as she added, “Do you really think that I would be that clumsy for someone to take a photo of me??”

“They could’ve!” Momo challenged, her voice raising.

Y/N took a step back and retorted angrily, “But they didn’t!” She pointed out, her own eyes slowly started to go glossy as she added, “I’m not stupid, Momo! I’ve been dating you for a year, I know what to avoid!”

“We can’t be too sure, Y/N!” Momo rasped out, her tears finally falling before she added, “What happens when they find out about us?? What’s going to happen to us then?? Do you know what they’ll to couples like us?? They’ll rip us apart!”

“Fine, then tell me to leave and I’ll go!” Y/N wept loudly, her tears falling freely as she sniffled, “Just... I’ll book the first flight home-“

“Y/N, I don’t mean it that way-“

“I’ll just book the first flight out tomorrow morning, okay?,” Y/N croacked out, breaking their gaze as she looked down at the floor before whispering, “I shouldn’t have caused such a burden to you.”

“Y/N, you’re not a burden,” Momo sobbed out softly, trying to get closer to her girlfriend but was heartbroken when Y/N took a step back instead. “Jagiya, just understand where I’m coming from; I’m doing this for us.”

At this point, Y/N was emotionally exhausted after having no rest in her system and her entire body was just numb. She understood where Momo came from and she wouldn’t want to wish any of this on anyone but she began to question certain things.

She didn’t want to let Momo go and she understood that Momo just didn’t want her personal relationships to be exposed but at the same time, the selfish part of Y/N, just wanted to be with her girlfriend without having the fear of getting pictures taken because some people can’t accept that idols are still human beings who craves human affection.

She released a shaky breath and nodded weakly while whispering, “I don’t know if there is an ‘us’ anymore, Momo.”

This caused Momo to sob loudly as she took a small step closer while crying out, “No, no, no, no- baby, don’t say that; tell me you don’t mean that!”

Before Y/N could reply, the door suddenly barged open and the laughters of the other girls suddenly went silent as the 8 of them sensed the tense atmosphere in the room.

The 8 of them looked at each other before Jihyo glanced at the couple and realized that the both of them were heaving while their eyes were actually leaving tears.

“Guys, what’s going on here?” Jihyo questioned gently, taking a few steps closer to the couple before she continued, “What happened?”

Taking in a deep breath, Y/N wiped her tears and forced a smile as she looked at Jihyo and rasped out, “Thank you for all the help but I think I should go back to the hotel and let you girls perform without any distraction.”

Momo then grabbed her girlfriend’s hands and pleaded, “Y/N, don’t do this, please!”

Holding back her tears and trying to avoid a bigger scene, Y/N placed a teary kiss on her girlfriend’s forehead before she whispered, “Have a good performance, Momo-ya; I know you’ll do well like always.”

Y/N immediately but gently removed Momo’s grasp on her before she quickly made her way out while her girlfriend constantly calls out her name. The moment the door was pulled shut, the 8 girls immediately made their way to Momo and comforted her as she continued to cry.

“What happened, Momo-ya?” Jeongyeon asked her roommate, sad that she had to see her in this kind of state.

“Do I have to kill her??” Nayeon asked angrily as she added, “Wasn’t she supposed to surprise you??”

Jihyo then hushed the both of them before calmly saying, “Guys, let Momo explain to us what happened first before we jump to conclusions.”

“Momo-ya... what happened?” Sana asked gently as she wrapped an arm around her fellow Japanese before she continued, “Weren’t you happy to see her?”

Sobbing, Momo nodded while saying, “Of course I was excited to see her but— but I was scared, okay!”

Furrowing her brows with confusion, Jeongyeon asked, “Scared about what?”

Momo then looked at her roommate with red eyes as she said, “Scared that someone will catch us! That someone will send those photos to Dispatch and I’d go through this stupid internet bullying all over again!”

The moment the Japanese girl admitted her fears, the rest of the girls looked at each other as they knew exactly where Momo was coming from. This wasn’t Momo’s first relationship but it was the first one where it was involving 2 girls and if her first relationship with a man caused so much chaos— they can’t imagine what’ll the netizen do to her when they find out that she’s dating a girl.

However, the leader of Twice then chimed in, “As much as I understand where your coming from, Momo-ya, don’t push Y/N away because of your fears,” Jihyo reasoned gently as she then added, “A relationship is a two-way street and I’m sure your girlfriend understands the consequences of dating an idol but she did go through all this trouble to surprise you; she even took the dawn flight here because it was the only flight available.”

“It’s true, Momo-ya...” Sana quietly added as she continued with, “I had a spare ticket and decided to-“

“You were the one who gave her the spare ticket???”

“Only because she missed you and you missed her too!” The other Japanese fired back before she reminded, “Have you forgotten the amount of nights where you cried to me because you missed Y/N so much??”

“Sana-ya, you should’ve at least discussed with me first!” Momo replied before she added, “It could’ve taken a disastrous turn-“

“But it didn’t, right??” Sana challenged as she pointed out, “The rest of the girls may not be brave enough to tell you this but I do so here goes; try to be grateful for the fact that your girlfriend flew all the way here with no sleep, just to surprise the girlfriend who she hasn’t seen for the past 6 months.”

Sensing the tension increasing, Dahyun chuckled awkwardly before she quietly chimed, “Sana unnie..” She pleaded quietly before she grabbed the older girl by the arm and said, “That’s enough..”

“No! She needs to understand what she just did to the person she loves!” Sana pointed out while shrugging Dahyun’s hands off and looked at her best friend before saying, “You want my honest opinion, Momo-ya? Yeah, I understand where you’re coming from but it is no reason for you to treat Y/N this way after all she did for you; that girl deserves to be loved the way she loves you and if you can’t provide that... then, you know what I’m going to say.”

With that said, Sana then turned around as she walked away before the rest of the girls sympathetically looked at Momo who was sobbing slightly before Jeongyeon placed a gentle hand on the girl’s shoulders while saying, “We all love you— we are always here for you... but Sana does have a point, Momo-ya.”

“Alright, girls— let’s talk about this later. We have a performance to think about.” Jihyo reminded as she glanced at Momo and advised, “Try your best to distract yourself for the time being.. you can see Y/N straight after the performance and talk things through.”

As the girls slowly dispersed, Nayeon stayed with Momo as she wrapped an arm around her shoulder before the latter looked at the older girl and asked, “Unnie, what do I do?”

“I understand why you’re scared— if it was me, I would probably react the same way but at the same time.. if I was Y/N, I’d be hurt too,” Nayeon admitted gently before she continued, “My best advice is to talk to her slowly and... see where it goes.”

For some reason, this made Momo’s heart ache. She had a sudden rush of reminder of all the words she had said to her girlfriend and she felt so helpless. Looking at Nayeon with the same teary eyes, Momo released a shaky sigh while she contemplates her next words.

“What if there’s no where to go anymore, unnie?”

xoxo

Momo knew that even if she wasn’t in the right state of mind, the show must go on. This was her job and she had expectations to fulfill. That being said, it didn’t lessen the pain in any way whatsoever.

Truth be told, there were many times where she could’ve just cried openly and be as obvious as she can but she knew it wouldn’t help her at all. So, as perseverance were one of the things she learned through her trainee days— she held on as long as she could.

The only time she’d shed a tear is when the group had won an award and they were doing their speech because to any unknown eye, Momo would just look like she was crying of joy.

But the act of deceit needed to come to an end somehow so the moment their performance was done and the ceremony was concluded, Momo immediately replaced her stage costume with the clothes that Y/N had brought earlier which initially triggered her even more.

Thankfully, her managers found out where Y/N was staying at and immediately drove Momo there. Now, finding the room number was the hard part.

Legally, hotels aren’t allowed to give out room numbers or keys without the consent of the customer or with a plausible cause but with Momo knowing Y/N’s full name and showed necessary proof of her connection with the latter, the Japanese got the room number at last.

Momo then asked her managers to wait at the lobby as she went up to the said room. Her heart racing, her body getting increasingly warmer, Momo was nervous and an absolute mess.

‘119.’

The Japanese could only stare at the room number— staying stagnant and not knowing the next move; the right move, at least. She knew that her girlfriend was more hurt than she was angry but that just meant that there was more things to solve on Momo’s part.

She wasn’t necessarily the best problem solver there is but this was her girlfriend; the same girlfriend who has been there for her through her absolute worst and she can’t imagine a life without her.

Taking a deep breath, Momo finally raised her hands and knocked on the door as she prayed that her girlfriend was still awake.

After getting no response for the first few knocks, Momo tried again by pressing the doorbell, following with a few more series of knocks before the door was slowly swung open— revealing a red eyed Y/N who was already dressed in her pajamas.

“Momo?” Y/N whispered rhetorically before she continued, “What are you doing here so late? You should go home and res-“

Momo, her heart immediately reacting to the sight of her broken girlfriend, shed a silent tear as she took a step forward towards Y/N while asking, “Are you really leaving tomorrow? Please tell me you’re not.”

Y/N was weak for her girlfriend— it was just a given when it came to this relationship so when Momo held her by the hands, she was frozen still. Noticing the tears leaving her girlfriend’s eyes, Y/N nodded and weakly said, “....I am. I managed to get a flight back tomorrow morning.”

Saddened by the revelation, Momo moved her hands to her girlfriend’s waist and it hurt her when she could feel Y/N stiffening at the touch before she pleaded, “Please don’t go back.. I’m sorry for what I’ve said to you just please— stay with me.”

“You wanted this, didn’t you?” Y/N reminded, her voice gentle but her tone bitter as she added, “I’m doing this for you, Momo-ya-“

“I’m sorry, okay!” Momo intervened, taking a step closer towards Y/N as she justified, “I’m just scared that— that I’ll lose you if they find out about us.”

Immediately cupping her girlfriend’s face, Y/N released a shaky breath as she whispered reassuringly, “I will never do that you; I will never leave you because someone doesn’t like us together.”

“My previous relationships told me the same thing, Y/N,” The Japanese recalled sadly as she continued, “But when the stress got to them, they took off— just like that.”

Y/N sighed but she understood where Momo’s insecurities were from. She’s heard the whole story and she too, would not want anyone to go through what her girlfriend had went through.

Pulling away slightly, Y/N then grabbed Momo’s hand before she pulled her inside the room, closing the door in the process, as the couple sat on the bed. They both faced each other as Y/N then held the hands of the Japanese as she gently said, “Look, I’m sorry that the idiots before me hurt you with the way that they did, and I can’t promise you that I won’t hurt you in any way but... I can promise you that I will not leave because of someone’s disapproval.”

Scooting closer to her girlfriend, Y/N then softly added, “I’m sorry that I didn’t think this through... I knew how scared you are with all of this and I should’ve at least planned it a little better.” She then raised her right hand before cupping Momo’s cheek and admitted, “.... But I just wanted to be with my girlfriend tonight and watch her perform; I know that sounds selfish but I did make sure that no one tailed me— baby, you have to have a little bit more faith in me. I would never risk your career like that.”

The teary eyes of the Japanese girl spoke volumes as she wrapped her arms around Y/N’s shoulder while she burrowed her head in the nook of the latter’s neck before saying, “I’m sorry... I should’ve just appreciated the fact that you were there when I needed you the most.”

“Speaking of which, the girls told me that you’ve been having a bad week lately... Wanna tell me what’s going on?”

Momo tightened her grip as she shook her head and said, “Let’s talk about it tomorrow while we go on a date; the managers gave me a day to spend with you. Now, I just want to cuddle and fall asleep in your arms again.”

Without further ado, the couple got ready for bed as Momo shamelessly used Y/N’s clothes as her pajamas before the two of them laid in bed and instinctively faced each other, like how they always do whenever they’re together.

“You’re still so pretty after 6 months of not seeing each other,” Momo whispered as she continued, “You’re still the same person I love— and I’m really sorry for what happened-“

“It’s okay, jagi, we’re over that— I promise. As long as we’re okay and solved the issue, that’s all that matters.”

Comfortable silence then took over them as they just gazed at each other with pure love and affection. Y/N then placed her arm around Momo’s waist as a small smile formed on both of their lips.

Leaning closer to her girlfriend, Momo then raised one of her hands before she placed them on Y/N’s cheek, gently caressing it as she muttered, “Hey, Y/N?”

“Hm?”

“It’s you and me against the world, right?”

This made Y/N smile widely as she nodded before leaning forward, connecting their lips gently while the subtle fragrant of mint fill their noses. She then pulled away slightly and kissed the tip of Momo’s nose before she gazed into the eyes of her beautiful girlfriend— so sure of the words she was going to say next.

“Yes, baby— it’s you and me against the world.”

[crying-over-gay-dramas]

Okay here is my official rant post about My Engineer, specifically the finale. Spoiler: I literally have zero criticism for it so it’s just gonna be me gushing about how perfect it was, and analyzing some things. (I save the best analysis, RamKing, for last)

I’ve mentioned this before, but as a whole this series was so good I think for just how well put together it was. All the couples got pretty equal or at least well distributed screen time. And for couples who got less (Like TharaFrong) I assume they’re keeping it open for season two. You couldn't really get bored watching because it always flowed so well into the next scene, and all the couples were really great and special for their own reasons. Plus the character development was great and I know it’s gonna get even better in season two.

Now I want to go in and talk about all the couples:

BohnDuen

Throughout the airing of this series, I saw many people having doubts about BohnDuen. I saw many good points such as how they were reallly bad at communicating, Duen never tried to understand Bohn’s feelings, and Bohn was always too pushy about things. However as the series progressed we could see them slowly evolving and becoming better. Obviously even at the end, they still have problems but they’ve improved so much and I know that in Season two they will continue to progress. For Bohn, he started out super jealous. He was always really pushy towards Duen. Towards the middle he finally started to become better, keeping his jealousy more in check and pulling back a little. For Duen, who kept ignoring Duen’s feelings, he finally started trying to see things from Bohn’s point of view. He opened up a little more and even changed their relationship status on Facebook, something he knew would mean a lot to Bohn. For both of them, recognizing their flaws was hard but they wanted to be better for each other. Also in the finale, we got Duen finally telling Bohn he loves him. That was a really big deal for Duen who honestly is pretty shy. This is his first relationship. He’s not used to someone being jealous over him, someone thinking he’s cute. Physical affection was also something that came hard to Duen, but as seen by the finale (*sobs*) he’s evolving in that regard as well, even initiating a kiss himself. 

I really liked too, how before the second kiss when Duen put up his hand to block him, how Bohn kissed him through his hand (twiceeee). Bohn accepted that maybe Duen wasn’t ready for a second kiss yet, and let Duen make the choice. Even when Duen lowered his hand he let him make the choice, which he did and initiated that second kiss. <3 I think these two putting in so much effort for each other and developing so much as a couple, and as individuals indicates a really great future ahead for them. 

MekBoss

Okay I’ll be real, I may have doubted Boss for just a tiny second. I heard a rumor they were gonna have an unhappy ending so when Fon (Is that her name? I’m too lazy to look it up) showed up I got scared. But omg Bossss!!!! He handled it so well. He was so sweet to Fon, and that hug honestly made me cry a little. I was really happy that he told her she shouldn’t give up becoming an idol too. It wouldn’t have been right for her to have to give up her dream for Boss. (It was really sweet that she was willing though) And then when he went back to Mek and revealed their relationship with that megaphone? A cinematic masterpiece. For Mek, who had spent so long hiding his feelings for Boss, Boss clearly stating that they are together and that he loves him in front of everyone would have been such a cathartic release for Mek. For Boss too, who had also had feelings for him tucked away. 

In that moment Boss was choosing Mek 100% without a doubt. All the time they had spent together, the way Mek always helped and took care of Boss. He was fully realizing that he wanted Mek and only Mek. They spent so long being so close but so far from each other. That moment was a new start for them, a real start.  lmao and Ting’s reaction will never not be the funniest thing ever: “What the hell? Did I join a volunteer camp of a love camp here?!” 

TharaFrong

Agdhh poor Frong lmao. I had a feeling nothing major would happen with them in the finale since they were moving slower than the others. Frong, after getting over his feelings for Duen so quickly falling for someone else, Thara, would be really hard. After experiencing Duen’s rejection (sort of, Duen was so clueless during that smh) putting himself out there again would be really hard. But he started falling for Thara anyways, falling for the way he took care of his patients (specifically Frong’s mom), the kindness he so naturally gives to others (such as searching for Thara’s necklace, and the weirder aspects of his personality (such as a certain adorable lizard he can’t seem to stop talking about). 

I don’t really see Thara’s line as friend/brother zoning him. More as I feel that he hasn’t considered Frong in that way yet (although him taking pictures of him shirtless was a bit suspicious lmao) and I think in season two we’ll see him develop feelings as well. (I’m kinda hoping for them to be a lil angsty ngl)

Okay. Here it is. RAMKING.

They 100% had THE best buildup, and plot. The way they met, the slow transformation into friendship, people around them either shipping them or thinking they were a couple, it was all so !!! It was perfect too, because they had us so convinced that King was gay panicking, and pushing Ram away because he didn’t understand what he was felling BUT NO he knew EXACTLY how he felt, and he’d just been holding himself back this whole time. I can’t get over that. All those flashbacks they showed, King knew exactly what he was feeling and it was overwhelming that he finally couldn’t take it anymore. I think when Ram made him that crown, and their friends commented that they looked cute together, like a couple.. I think that’s when King really started to realize he couldn’t do it any more. While Ram was smiling, King had a different look. 

He seemed to be under the impression Ram didn’t feel the same, or maybe he was hesitating because of all the stress that Ram has been under with his dad. I think it was the former though. His face when Ram put his arm around him in episode 13 was so unsure. I originally took it to mean that he didn’t understand what he was feeling, but now I’m thinking it was because he couldn’t understand why Ram was doing that. It’s like he was torn between his feelings, and his uncertainty of Ram’s feelings. He had no way of knowing for sure if Ram had feelings (although at the point, the way Ram looked at him and took care of him it would have been hard to miss, but when your emotions for someone are so strong it’s hard to see things from a clear perspective. Does it seem like they feel the same because you want to? Or because they really do?) For King, who understands Ram so well, not being able to tell how he was feeling was terrifying, and having to hold himself back was painful (as he said himself *sobs*) As for Ram, I think he also knew full well what his feelings were, and also didn’t know how King felt. He was happy just staying by his side, as a friend taking care of him. King suddenly pulling away was confusing for Ram. It hurt him to be away from him, but he was patient and waited for King to tell him why he was acting the way he was. King had always been so understanding with Ram’s emotions, and Ram wanted to do the same. While they were apart, I noticed how during BohnDuen’s reunion and MekBoss’ confession they focused on King’s reaction. He was happy for his friends, but I saw another emotion in his expression. One that reflected the conflict and pain he was feeling over his emotions for Ram. 

The way he went from smiling, to that face was soo good. That one little moment was a big indicator of what was going on in King’s head and the pain he was currently feeling.

Then, finally (it might have helped that he was a little drunk) King admitted to everything he’d been feeling. That he was pushing him away because he feels good with him, and it was painful to hold back around him all the time. And we all know what happened next (*Sobbing noises*) They finally released all those emotions they’d been holding in, the pull they’d felt for each other since day one, the unexplainably deep understanding they have for each other. It all came together. Okay but that kiss was so !!!! Like the !!! the foreheads!!! The closed eyes!!! It was all passion, emotion it was so aHHH 

Then the way they were lying the next morning (also may or may not be my new computer wallpaper oops) was so !! They’re turned in towards each other, King’s arm lying against Ram’s chest, his head tucker into him. I thought that position did a great job of reflecting them as a couple. The way they kept being drawn to each other. Also, after King woke up and the way he so quickly believed that Ram had forgotten what had happened last night, made me even more certain that King is scared and uncertain of Ram’s feelings. They both obviously have feelings for each other, it’s now just a matter of figuring out how to express them to each other. (Although who knows what complications Season 2 could throw at them)

Okay So I lied, I do have a very small criticism: I didn’t like that Bohn pulled the “I don’t like men, I just like you” line. That always bugs me. In BL there’s always a fine between a series being genuinely good and romantic and a series being focused on mainly fan service. I’ve always seen that line as a sign that a series is gonna be kinda fan service-y. However, My Engineer was not at all like that. It was definitely one of the good ones (one of the best honestly) so in this case that line wasn’t a bad sign. Still, I wish that hadn’t been included. Also, we deserved more Cupcake content and we better get some in season two. I want to see Thara baby his lizard some more god dammnit. 

Also this is random but I really hope they give Ting a man in S2. She deserves it. (Or a girlfriend in which case I volunteer I love her so much)

This was a really massive post and if you read this entire thing I would like to give you a virtual hug. Have a good day!! <3 I’m gonna go back to sobbing and replaying the episode now

[kyu-bri]

Magia Rapport pt 2

@magiarapport​

August 24th prompt: What was your favorite event, and why? Is it because of gameplay or the story?

It’s hard to choose so I’m gonna just, gush a bit.

As you can probably tell I’m very biased toward the OG girls, I started Magia Record primarily because PMMM had become my new obsession and I wanted some sort of constant flow of content out of decade old anime lmao.

But another thing I think I hooked onto was Inu Curry’s writing. They really know Madoka Magica and aren’t afraid to really play with them- something the writers for a spin-off gacha game (as with most spin-off stories honestly) can be scared to do. Inu Curry made references, revealed secrets and built upon the story we already know- which lets be honest is what we always truly want from a spin-off series. Magia Record proper does this well by putting more magical girls into the world and letting us see things work out better for them than for the original cast, but what I really appreciated with this story was getting to see that old original cast get to get in on that, and these events managed to do that without watering them down any.

Under the cut is me going on for 3000 words about why I love these three events I’m so sorry. TL;DR at the very end-

I’ll go in release order,

A La Carte Valentine was one of the first if not THE first event I got in on. I was eager to bc 1 Gay Magical Girl Shit Guaranteed. And ofc 2 OG Cast participation.

I want to preface by saying I actually loved all the girls’ stories in this. I was very much still in a state of getting used to Iroha’s gang let alone trying to care about the secondary girls. I knew Tsukasa had this angsty Twins Separated At Birth Deal and liked seeing her home life (also I immediantly stanned Take. Regular well-meaning dude who has no idea whats going on just trying his best and hating his boss). I knew nothing about Ami except Cowgirl Meguca and getting the bulk of her personality in one short even I think really kept me from being absolutely sick of her, she’s just a cute silly teenage girl who could be in literally anything and I was able to just endearingly giggle at that. Hinano managed to do the heterosexual unrequited crush cliché without me groaning or missing any of her regular personality. Also was there a Ren part? I don’t remember because everything Ren does feels like a Soft Yuri Valentines Special. Also I love Momoko. Ok moving on to what I Really wanna talk about.

Madoka is genuinely my Least Cared About of the Holy Sextet. I don’t think she’s bad or even boring- Madoka has a depth to her character, like, really deep- but that’s not something ever really touched upon by the fandom. Even when people like her and make her the Heroine she’s Supposed to be, it’s usually in the context of “Girl who feels nothing but kindness and happy thoughts would cut off her right hand to feed to a hungry dog. Isn’t she so Good????”. And honestly, while I understand the point it was going to make, I wasn’t crazy about her sacrifice in the end of the series. (Team Homura “Rebellion Is Good Actually” ftw) All because I think that I’m an Adult Woman watching this like “You are 14yrs old and need to be home playing Sims and not sacrificing yourself for the greater good you stupid silly little baby girl”

So my point is here near all fan content I encounter tends to emphasize whats sort of my least favorite facet of Madoka. I don’t think she made the ‘wrong’ decision in the context she and the story were given, but it’s still a sad thing to show a depressed(!!!) insecure girl resolving to give away her very existence so that every other girl on earth has a chance to just Dream. Oh and they still usually die young. But that’s ok because then she takes them and lets them sleep peacefully forever in her Heaven Basement (Yes I am bitter stan Homura I would yank this savior complex infant girl out the sky too)

MY POINT BEING (The servers closing let me BLEED OUT ALL MY FEELINGS) This event did not do that!!! It made Madoka…….. EVERYTHING SHE SHOULD BE??? ALWAYS??? Showed her HOW WE SHOULD BE ABLE TO VIEW HER??? (Read: Happy and Alive and Confident at no foreboding or sacrifice of anyone else!!!!)

She is Sassy and Surrounded By Friends and Really Funny??? And we get this Ridiculous Oh My God On Crack metaphor about her being this all-powerful apocalypse bringing being which is representing her love for the universe through her Witch form of Wanting Everyone To Be Happy And Safe With Her??? And she still risks herself to save everyone as is her Thing to do but we get to have her do it without erasing her existence as a human being at the end and if that is not some GOOD SHIT????

Ok next:

NGL Sayaka’s (fav character, inarguable best girl, can u not tell) parts in MagiReco til like the last arc have always left me a bit disappointed. She was the only late comer of the OG girls from what I understand and it kind of gives her the air of what a lot of the second(/thirdary?) girls suffer from. You can tell the writers can’t even figure out a trope to apply her to to make her easy and two dimensional to write about so they just don’t know what to do. They definitely try to make up for it (especially in the anime which Praise Be but that’s probably Inu Currys doing) but she’s still lacking like, any of the depth of her personality. Which, I guess I could anticipate. Because most of the fandom tends to as well. (again)

Gonna stop complaining and get on with- That didn’t feel as much the case in her Valentine event. Sure it was still the same formula of “The Issue Is Kyosuke” but that didn’t play out as grueling as her personal story did with “Nine Episodes Of “The Issue Is Kyosuke””

There was one big glaring heart-aching detail of “Mami isn’t really there because SHES IN A FUCKING CULT RIGHT NOW” which kind of jarred the event out of the ho-hum silly valentines sidestory these events usually keep up.

Sayaka has this crisis about Doing Anything Meaningful With Kyosuke which we all know what That’s calling back to, but in this environment we get to have Kyoko come right up and be in a position with her to earnestly and affectionately Push Her To Do It. The lonely little tsundere bitch girl pushes her Not Friend to Give The Bastard The Gotdamn Chocolate Already and for a moment you can only think about What If’s and If Only’s. Sayaka’s is still the weakest of the threes stories in this event but it worked harder to show us different sides of the characters then 6 chapters of Another Story managed to do.

And then there’s fucking Homura.

I will be, eternally grateful for Kuro. As a character that becomes metaphorical for the 2D ways we initially viewed the feathers and just NPCs in games in general, and also like, giving Homura a friend she actually cares about that isn’t the tangled dark web of Bullshit she’s gotten tied up with Madoka in. Please ask me about all my AU’s where Kuro is Homuras first girlfriend.

Seeing Moemura in Magia Record has always been a bit surreal, we never really understand just what stage of Trauma this Homura is in because Multiverses Are Hell, but this event gives us a good chunk of a Homura who still has hope and faith both in the world and Madoka. Theres this wonder to her that while still bogged down by terrible experiences still has the energy to be Trying. And she sees a girl who used to be like her- which when you think about it is probably what Madoka saw in her- and she wants to help. Because Madoka helped her. And Madoka is the best thing in the universe and maybe Homura can be just a little bit closer to that.

Kuro is too far gone though, as is the reality frequently in this series, things don’t work out just because of circumstance. Kuro was a bullied, insecure little girl who realistically shouldn’t have had to become a rampaging monster because of it. We’re reminded of this being the reality of the Madoka universe. Homura, is reminded of this reality. Homura loses this one chance to bring hope into the world like Madoka brought hope into hers.

And then her story ties into the ending of Madoka’s. Madoka saves her life yet again, even as Homura continues to feel miserable and empty. But at least Madoka is with her. The girls then share a quiet, intimate Valentines together. And you sort of understand how Homura fell so far into the darkness that the only thing she was able to still care about and fight for was Madoka’s safety.

That shit slaps. It slaps you right in the heart and causes fucking bruising but then u want it to do it again because you’re masochistic and Meguca Is Suffering.

Anyway I hope Kuroe slaps our hearts more in season2

MOVING ON!!!!

~Nagisa’s Wish~

Ok, I don’t remember what got me so simp over Nagisa, I think it was the heart-aching irony that Mami adopts the witch that fucking ate her. But that is my baby now and I’d die for her. Fandom Charlotte whose pink and silly and loves her mom and is Mami’s cancer-riddled girlfriend is cool and all but she isn’t a tiny Halloweeny baby whose fucking bitter angry and manically obsessed with cheese due to PTSD.

I had saw a summary of Nagisa’s Wish reposted just to quickly explain Nagisa’s backstory, and as such immediately had to search out if that crazy ride was true- so I actually watched this whole event probably before I downloaded the game. It was surreal on its own but replaying it when it came to NA didn’t lessen it any- I got to process more of what I was witnessing and as result stanned Yu pretty hard.

I guess to explain my Emotions here, saving Yu for later- calls for me to just, describe who Nagisa is as a human being and my headcanons surrounding it all with what this event gave us. Whether you consider it canon or not it’s one version of events that we were given and that I am all for accepting.

Nagisa’s Mom was a celebrity, she could have been an actress though I also like the idea of her being an Idol. She met Nagisa’s Dad oh-so romantically and got knocked up- they very well could have been married but it doesn’t seem clear enough. He seems to have left too suddenly for legal matters like that. Nagisa is approximately 11, and while she seems to remember her Father, she doesn’t in the sense of having had a relationship with him or any feelings. Her Mother has to “explain” why he left, so Nagisa was probably still young even if not a baby. What I’m getting at here is the timeline for when Nagisa’s Mom Got Like That. Nagisa can remember her from before she was, and then says that she got sick after her Dad left. So what I’m wondering is did Daddy Momoe ruin this young rich girls life, give her syphilis and then leave her with a baby she was unfit to care for in poverty? I know half of this is running on anime logic but Holy Shit all the possible ways reasons and ideas for why things could’ve gotten This Bad.

Is it ridiculously dark and edgy that the original story we were given was “Girl wishes her dying mother could have her favorite cake but then realizes OOPSIE-DAISY I could have wished for her to Not Die instead!!!!” got turned into “11yr old hates her abusive mother so much she wants to make her suffer in the most symbolic way she can and then goes mental when she isn’t able to do it”??? Yes. But if I had the mental capacity to I have to admit I was in a position to be just as bitter at that age too. I can’t call it unrealistic. I may infact be projecting hard with how much I support and enjoy this backstory.

Anyway Nagisa was in such a state of trauma and distress at a horrifically young age when she died that it broke her mental faculties so severely that even when she came back as a literal Angel of God she had blocked it out so deeply and thoroughly she seemingly regressed to an even younger capacity and hyperfixated on the trait that she has before used to try to bond with her Mother who she had died hating.

And that also slaps u right in the heart.

A N D T H E N !

~Beachside Bonds~

Just the simple structure of this story was so enjoyable and nicely done. We finally get to see the OG girls in a context we wouldn’t be able to in literally any other scenario. They’re going on a summer vacation together and Homura is sentimentally journaling every single second of it. Is this mayhaps because she’s never gotten to be this happy and blissful with these girls she loves so much??? Of course this is are you not paying attention what the fuck. Homura is so optimistic and healed and hopeful she’s acting like what she might actually be doing as a normal teenage girl. (A heartrending contrast to the end of her Valentines Special)

We get nothing short of pure fluffy Slice Of Life shenanigans on the beach which even includes a bunch of the Kamihama girls that the OG crew knows! And they talk about it! And introduce eachother! And their friends commentate on it! Ren gets to see Kyoko Not Being A Bitch and then Sayaka teases her about having made friends and oh my god my heart is turning into cottoncandy as we speak Mom holy FUCK

Sayaka’s existence fucking matters in this story! It’s her families Hotel they’re staying at and she has relationships and memories with the creepy twins that live there and she talks like a fucking person??? And gives opinions??? That aren’t just copypasted “Justice is Good and Bad things are BAD!!!!”

Mami is fresh out of her fucking Cult Drama and she’s still trying to be cool Senpai but then she DECKS Homura in the face and gets scared by the ghost stories and then turns into pudding and waxes nostalgia at Kyoko out of nowhere IT’S ALMOST LIKE SHE’S A FIFTEEN YEAR OLD GIRL????????

G H O S T S ? ? ? ?

Y U ! ? ! ? ! ? !

(IS G A Y ! ! ! !)

This whole fucking backstory and truly horrifying Romeo and Juliet on Acid love and death story between Yu and her girlfriend and like if I wasn’t fascinated enough by Yu just being the creepy organ harvester before but apparently thats what she became after she literally made some sort of wish that erased all of her memories besides the nickname her sweetheart used for her and coincidentally also added to her the task of killing all Bad People?????

Yu made a wish to be able to get rid of All Bad People preserving the innocent version of herself who grew up with this girl and it was right after a failed double suicide attempt on fucking Doomed Lovers Cliff fucking Lifetime Will You Ever.

It then pairs with Homura whose PTSD gets to shine through a bit in being unable to believe any bad sort of Madoka which how could you try to force her to at this point while Also pairing Homura with Ren in the “Gay Love Saved Our Lives: Traumatized vers & Vanilla vers”

I don’t remember if there was a symbolic finale and tbh I have forgotten a lot of the details with Yu and her girlfriend Whatsherface because that shit was just so shocking and bizarre to read and much too painful to reread in a timely fashion just.

That shit hurted but it was full of so much love and hope both doomed and stolen but still was wrapped up in the comforting concept that This Is The Universe Where Homura Gets To Be Okay This Time.

She’s still scarred beyond comprehension and this ghost drama accentuated it all but at the end of the day this is still the Safe Universe where all of them are alive and the Holy Quintet are friends and they’re all going to be okay (Godoka & Aniplex willing) and so many of us love Madoka Magica because it shows girls fighting through the same pain we’ve been through and keeping their hope alive and here we get to see them actually find peace in a clunkily written fanservicey spin-off mobile gacha game and hey, that made me happy while I got to experience it. Thanks for the ideas and memories and tragic backstories and funny thirdary characters MagiReco I’m gonna take em all and Run.

Akjsladbfalkjfsbslk If you read this all without getting a migraine or blocking me ily thanks for listening!!!!!!

TL;DR

Me likey A La Carte Valentine bc it’s silly and gay and I simp Kuro

Me likey Nagisa’s Wish bc sawft baby is good and so are Tragic Edgy Backstories

Me likey Beachside Bonds bc Gay Ghosts and Our Girls Finally Get To Be Happy Peaceful(ish) Teenage Girls and that’s all I want for them ;w;

Reeses In Pieces ya’ll

1Ten 2More 3Words 4To 5Hit 6(3000 7Words 8Woo 9Boy 10Howdy

[tslasvegas]

Episode 5 - “The clowns are in full force this season” - Jaiden

The clowns are in full force this season. First of all that tribal council was a load of fucking shit lmfao, I could not believe the sob stories Nik and Joey were pulling out to try and stay another day in this fucking org... it is final 17 it's not that serious. I will say that I immediately regretted the decision to vote for Joey but now I'm realizing how beneficial it might've been after all, like.. now people don't see that Joey and I are as closely aligned as we are and it definitely shows Kailyn that not only can I be loyal, but also that I had an accurate read on the events of this tribe. Interestingly enough, Kailyn did NOT believe me when I told her we didn't have the votes to keep Nik without drawing rocks. As soon as the tie came in I acted all mad and said "I'm not drawing rocks for this, I'm flipping". ...and Kailyn still had the nerve to ask "wait did you flip?" after it was all said and done! The funny thing is, Ben also assumed Kailyn flipped and immediately DMed me saying "So I assume Kailyn flipped go figure" or something to that extent. LOVES IT! Maybe no one thinks I'm a flip-flopper after all. Rachael being on this tribe already bugs me because I think she's going to get along with just about everybody and we should've taken a shot at her when we had a chance. It's become evident that I need to start playing the chips game a lot more than I have been because those little buggers are going to become more and more important as time goes along. I think Rachael is fucking full of it when she says there was nothing on Exile for her. She either has an idol and is lying about it, or she's got some sort of advantage to help her out and I'm not here for it. I did eventually come clean to Rachael about the whole DeNara vote thing, where I whipped around and pretended to be voting for Ben afterwards, but I don't think it has a strong impact on our relationship. She gives me such an uneasy vibe and I don't want her around much longer... I kind of hate this tribe I got swapped onto because everybody here feels like legitimate threats to win this game except I guess myself right now. And Xavier. He doesn't really provide much to the game yet, but I bet he will surprise us all along the way. Agenda for this round... make sure we win immunity. But if we don't.. sorry Rachael, you're going to just have to see your buddy Nik a lot sooner than you would've liked. Ciao!

Survived another Tribal!

Super sad to see Nik voted out but also insanely glad to see Joey survived. It would be heartbreaking to see him voted out first after the swap. Livingston and I are sharing all the chips we have and when we spin the wheel we’re transferring chips so if we land on a bankrupt spot we don’t lose the 28 chips we have so far. If we win this next immunity challenge, we may have enough chips to purchase the super idol that’s on sale for 48 chips. (If we both bid two chips on the challenge and then spin the wheel and get some chips.) otherwise, if someone purchases it before we do, we may end up buying some other useful items. Now it’s a selfie scavenger hunt which I hate, but that’s alright. Gonna give it my all and hope to take home the win. 

I just had a moment of clarity. The other tribe are full of OG Palazzo. If they stick together, we're screwed. We should win this next one, see how their vote goes, and change our plans accordingly.

So my lazy ass hasent done any of these yet. So let me catch y’all up. So when my original trive first went to tribal I kinda thought I was fucked cus like I barely talked to ppl. Nik and Rachel were my closest allies (Rachael being my final 2). So quickly they told me denara wanted my ass out. Fucking mistake. So I got my sheep in order and went to work. I pulled some bs outta my ass and was like yo we got a swap coming up and denara is too fucking social she’s gonna flip on your asses. The more I said it the more it made sense to me lol. That fucking tribal was AIDSSS. I’m literally sitting there thinking I was getting booted, but my fucming savior Jaiden came up clutch. We sent that bitch packing. So me and Rachael have had a strat this game to send each other our coins before spinning the wheel to avoid going bankrupt. Since I’m a fucking gambling addict I’m always betting on the comps and spinning that wheel till I’m stacked on coins. So we hit a swap and I actually started talking to people. John is pretty chill and Xavier is kinda weird ngl. When it came time to vote nobody wanted to bring anything up to me. I had to hear from kaitlyn that nik was sadly the vote. So I quickly went to work. I felt the least connected to Joey so I went after his bitch ass. Originally, I didn’t wanna stick with my tribe but like they kinda forced us into that by keeping us in the dark. Everytime I’d ask Xavier his thoughts he’d just say some weird ass response and avoid my question lol. So like I kinda expected a tie vote and tbh I wanted rocks. We get to tribal it was a tie, and I’m fucking trying my best to get Xavier to flip cus he just seems like the dumbest person there. He’s like we can take nik out now then Joey next. LIKE FUCK NO. He wanted to create an all noobies alliance with idek. But I agreed cus fuck it. So sadly nik went home cus jaiden flipped :/ BUT me and Rachael got all his chips!! Now I’m fucking vibing with 10, and Rachael had got 8. Tbh we wanna save up for an idol, but with the shop at 20% and another 4-4 vote looming, I’d be down to snag an extra vote. I gotta peep all these new prices tho. I do hope we win this comp cus I’m obviously betting and I’m too lazy to fucking deal with another tribal. Well anyways peace out see y’all later. 

My plan continues to just be working on relationships and hopefully winning the challenges. Either way, I've participated one of the most on the team so I'm hoping if we do lose, I won't become the target. I know I have a strong relationship with Kevin, which is 1/4 of the tribe. I'm also working on my relationships with Keegan, Pat, and Livingston. I kind of hope the other team targets Rachael, just because I wasn't a huge fan the last time I had to deal with her. I also want John and Xavier to survive because I know I have solid relationships with them. We're at day 14 and I've already put so much work to evolve my game, I want to go from worst to first - I want to do all the things I couldn't do when I was 16. But I have to keep thinking three steps ahead. So if we lose, my target is Mo. Nobody from OG Pink has been voted out yet - but because they have majority on this tribe there really isn't much I can do yet, but Mo hasn't contributed to the challenge. They're also very awkward, so I think I'd be able to swing it. If I keep working on my relationships, working hard in challenges and showing myself as a good ally - I have a chance to make it deep in this game. For now - let's hope we win the challenge so I can relax a little bit more. Day 15 is the farthest I've ever made it so if we do end up winning I've completed my third goal. (The first two being going a tribal without getting a vote, and leading a blindside.) My other four goals - getting an advantage, making merge, winning individual immunity, and winning this game. Get your checklist out, cause I'm coming.

Keegs and I have 28 chips between us then Okay so I told Keegan this, and I could be wrong, but I feel as if the numbers in the vault seem fairly good and that leads me to believe that nothing has been bought yet. If anyone else gotten in there, they are likely saving up for the Super Idol. Keegan and I will be saving up for it but if it ends up being gone, we'll at least have enough chips to pick up some other stuff. Keegan to me: "Also, I just thought of something. Since it’s possible to go Bankrupt from the wheel, would it be a good idea for us to give most/all chips to each other before we spin the wheel? That way if we do land on a bad spot, we’re only losing like 1 chip instead of the 10-20?" This gonna be our wheel strat moving forward

...five seconds later

Jake came to me wanting to work together. Of course, there is no real way to turn such things down so I let Keegs know and then I told him I would be down for that. I am not tryna do some Final 2 or whatever. For now it is just a "I have your back if you have mine" type thing. Jake also went to Keegan so Jake better not fuck up and be overly messy because I have enjoyed my convos w him LMAO - Okay so update on that: he has pitched a 3 of me, him and Keegan. This is good for us so we are going with it but my loyalties are to Keegan before Jake and I think Keegan feels the same way. We are being hesitant just in case Jake has also pitched similar things to other people. If we go to tribal, ideally we keep Jake safe but if he's being like this with everyone then maybe he's the one to go. I like Jake so I would really make rather it be the former.

So nervous about this challenge! We went all in! I even danced Blackpink. My gosh we have to win this.

fuck

38 points in SSH is a terrible score, I’m upset at my poor performance, but now that I just acquired the Legacy Advantage, it makes my game so much more interesting to say the least. I have 11 chips, I could’ve bought an idol, but given my luck, I’d rather not risk all my chips and lose them on a bankrupt.

this is so lame, im not super worried about getting voted out but still i just like the serene environment that comes with immunity, the chaos is fun too but like ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh im tired 

Well... we lost the challenge. And I am not surprised in the slightest. This was a very very poor showing from this tribe. Honestly, I wouldn’t mind voting out Jeff right now. He really flopped the challenge. But it seems like the OG Palazzo group is wanting to stick together and vote out one of Jake, Mo or Kevin. Ideally, Kevin would be the one to go. I’ve barely talked with him, and with his recent win in Travellers survivor, he’s certainly capable of playing a strong game. That’s someone I’d like out sooner rather than later. Andrew has suggested Jake. Which I definitely don’t want. Jake, Livingston and myself have a sort of three person thing going on. As long as Jake is casting his net over the entire tribe, I want to continue working with him. Mo is in a weird spot. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ At the end of the day though, I don’t really care who it is, as long as it ain’t me.

SO HAPPY TO HAVE FINALLY WON! Steph and I have enough chips either for an IDOL or two of other advantages. I would rather have two others, because there is an idol nullifier out there. And two advantages are better than one. I am going to be watching the tribal of Bellagio. I want to see if the OG Bellagio are a solid 5.

Ahhhh first time going to tribal. I’m really nervous. Not bec I think I’m in danger but more for long term... what to do?

girl... im so sick and tired of the people in this game keeping around inactive players because they know them from other games. SERIOUSLY, listen ma'am if my good friend is inactive, I know when someones dead weight. I get rid of them. They'll understand, and if they don't then thats a manipulative dumbass because who gets mad for being eliminated by a friend when they were inactive. it was originally gonna be me but ive been fucking pushing for kevin to go cus he doesnt do shit. DeNara give me strength.

Mo at one point was throwing my name out, which is awful. Apparently he’s not anymore. I think he’s voting for Kevin? Let’s hope so. I don’t want to be out of this game yet.

Currently holding that Legacy Advantage gives me much more access to information

[currentlyreadingmanga]

Toilet-bound Hanako-kun: Chapter 9 - The Young Exorcist (Part 1)

Previously: we’ve dealt with the confession tree, and Hanako and Yashiro filled my heart with feelings. It was a mostly light-hearted chapter, with a lot of funny moments but that last scene we had with them was very sweet and a solid foundation for their relationship to keep growing. I’m glad that we could see that even if Hanako does have a very teasing nature, he actually seems to genuinely care about Yashiro and he can be serious when he needs to be.

Now onto the next chapter!

Ohhhh okay it seems we are shifting the focus onto the Minamoto brothers with a flashback (I’m guessing the Minamoto-senpai Yashiro had a crush on is Kou’s older brother because same last name and they do look alike (fun fact: I mistoke them from one another when Kou was first introduced because of their looks and because we don’t know the older brother’s first name, but then I noticed they had different colour hair. I guess I would have been more confused if I hadn’t been watching the anime)

Anyway, the flashback. It seems to be set when senpai (I’m calling him that until we get a name) was eight years old and he’s fighting a....thing....that will probably haunt my nightmares at some point....but yeah, they ones overseeing him point out that he’s very skilled for his age but that also is to be expected of him. So I’m guessing he must be a very well regarded exorcist now if he was THAT talented when he was a child....which makes me wonder why he hasn’t done anything about the aparitions around the school. Is only Kou in charge of it?

Look at this baby. Look at him, my heart, he’s so cute. Kou is one year younger than Yashiro, right? and if Minamoto is a second year in hs (if I’m remembering correctly), then he should be six years old here, right? Smol bean

He jumps to hug his brother but senpai doesn’t seem happy that Kou followed him to his....training, I guess? Since he seems to be surpervised by a couple of men. And it makes sense, they’re both very young and things could go wrong, especially if no one know Kou is there 

And here we also see that Kou is very excited to follow up on his brothers footsteps and wants to be a great exorcist like his brother and it’s very on par with his attitude when we first met him and he tried to exorcise Hanako

But he then says “that’s what I always wanted, but...” and we cut next to him with his friends but looking back at Hanako in the hallway. And ah, the title for this week is “the young exorcist (part 1)”, so that means we’ll get a more Kou-centric chapter(s)? Exciting! That “but” and the cover page make me think that it’s very likely that he’s having doubts about the whole “beat all the supernaturals” thing since Hanako has been a pretty alright guy so far. If that’s the case, it could set up a good internal conflict for his character

This poor child is such a third wheel right now lol It’s okay, Kou, you’ll get used to their banter

But hey, it looks like Yashiro is trying to continue from where we left of last time when she decided she wanted to get to know Hanako better. Well, at least that’s what I think she’s trying to do with this compatibility horoscope

Okay, yeah, she’s definitely trying to get more information under the guise of the horoscope lol but Hanako doesn’t seem to want to cooperate. And I mean, it makes sense since I see him as someone who pretends to be carefree but doesn’t actually share important details about himself until he feels completely comfortable. After all the only reason we even know he killed someone is because Kou told us.

“If you wann do a compatibility horoscope, do it with one of your crushes. Like Minamoto-senpai or somebody” well, try not to sound so salty, mister

Kou is surprised by these news and Yashiro is saying that her crush on senpai is more akin to having a crush on an idol, someone you just admire from afar. And yeah, considerering how minimal their actual interactions were, and she realized that she doesn’t really know much about him besides what’s public knowledge

Well, speak of the devil and he shall appear lol He has the pretty boy sparkles and everything, huh? I can understand why Yashiro was so infatuated with him, he’s one handsome guy. Also if I was in this situation right now, I would crawl into a hole and die because that’s so embarrasing omg 

We have a name! Teru Minamoto, okay, easy to remember. We have upgrade from senpai to Teru. And he’s thanking Yashiro for being kind to Kou, awwww

oH. That...that doesn’t look good..........that smells like trouble. Also the change from sweet older brother figure to that cold look he threw towards Hanako was quick and a bit terrifying ngl

He’s pulled Kou aside and now they’re talking and he’s reminding him that if he encounters any of the seven mysteries, he should expel them immendiately but Kou doesn’t look too happy.

Ohhh okay, Teru says that they are aware of recent change in the supernaturals’ behaviou recently and that they hadn’t acted because they hadn’t put the students in danger before. And we know that’s true if we think about the mokke and how they said that they had been living in peace with the humans at the school for a long time until their story changed and they didn’t have another choice but to do as the rumors said

He also mentions that the seven mysteries are the most powerful and dangerous supernaturals in the school. Which makes sense, since Hanako mentioned that the seven are the ones controlling the seven boundaries between this world and the spirit world.

Here we seem to get a glimpse of some of the others, but most aren’t really distinguishable. We have Yakko and Hanako, then at the far left I think there’s some sort of mask, then there’s two silhouettes, and then we have what seems to be a girl holding something in her hands and then a mirror besides her.

But yeah, Teru says that since these seven are the most problematic, they should erradicate them first and foremost. Which, from a logical point of view makes sense but since we’re privy to their behaviour and we know that we could change things if we change the rumors, I want to say please do not exorcise my baby, he’s trying to keep the balance

And it seems Kou agrees with me. Hanako still pisses him off but he admits that the little sassy ghost has been really helpful (and he even protected Kou during their escapade to the Misaki Stairs despite saying he wouldn’t). Teru really seems to disagree, though, and

oH. Again. It really seems like Teru has his mind set about this. Like, I guess it make sense, we saw that they were trained from a young age and they are part of a legendary clan that has been exorcising spirits for generations, so the history probably doesn’t have much to say in favour of the apparitions

He also answers the question I had before about why it was just Kou going after the mysteries: apparently he had thought it would be a good way to let Kou grow as an exorcist but he now sees it had the opposite effect since he’s feeling sympathy for Hanako.

“I’m taking you off the seven mysteries case” that’s-that’s really not good if his glare to Hanako earlier is anything to go by. “I’ll clean up this mess” yiKES

Oh, okay, it seems like Kou managed to buy himself some more time before his brother intervenes. And yes, here’s the internal conflict I was hoping for

He knows what his duty is but he also has grown to care for not only Hanako but also (and especially) Yashiro. So there’s not only the fact that Hanako has been helpful but also the fact that Yashiro clearly cares a lot for the ghost since she protected him the first time they met. Kou seemed like a really sweet guy and all this just reinforces that notion.

Okay, so now has make it his mission to find evidence to prove to his brother that Hanako is not a bad supernatural. And it’s not a bad plan, since he would need to keep a close eye on Hanako either way, so it works in his favour.

I.....Hanako, sweetie, why-what-

Okay, he’s clearly collecting things with the help of the mokke and putting it in the big sack he’s carrying. But yeah, it really doesn’t help his case when Kou is trying to prove he’s not suspicious

Pfffft Kou really needs to work on his sneaking abilities since he almost got discovered by a teacher and immediately after that Hanako found him. Although Hanako probaly already knew he was being watched

Also

The ghost child really has no notion of personal space, huh? It’s not just Yashiro who has to deal with him all up in her face

I really love their dynamic, they’re so silly together 

Omg

Kou looks so distraugh here omg like “omfg please i’m trying to prove you’re a good guy why are you doing with all this stuff WH Y”

But Hanako is quick to point out that he’s actually collecting the things the mokke stole so he can give them back to the owners. And that this is happening because even though Yashiro changed the rumor, the mokke still feel the need to steal objects from people. And I hadn’t thought about it, but it makes sense since they’ve been doing it for so long and the rumor still technically says that they steal things from you even if now there’s a way to stop them from killing people

I just wanna head pat this cute child look at him.

Now Hanako is asking Kou to help him retrieve something that was stuck up in one of the towrs surrounding the school. My first question is why can’t Hanako float up there since he a ghost but it looks like Kou is asking the same thing and apparently he can’t float that high. Huh, okay. That kinda sucks and seems inconvenient but okay, good to know. 

And Hanako is apologizing for making him go through all this trouble but he insisted because the item seemed like it would be important for somebody. He seems honest and Kou is once again hit by the feeling that Hanako is not really a bad supernatural. And yeah, it’s like I said earlier: there’s probably not a good record of supernaturals doing good deeds and that’s what his family knows after generations spent fighting spirits. But Kou is hopeful that maybe his brother wasn’t totally right and that, as Hanako has been demostrating, good supernaturals can exist. 

OH

Oh no. While Hanako seems to have caught what they were looking for, he also slipped from Kou’s grasp and that’s not good....well...kinda. I mean, he’s a ghost, right? Like, this sounds horrible but he’s already dead, so he can’t get too hurt from this fall............right?

I feel like this chapter has been full of me just gushing about what a good boy Kou is and honestly? he is and I regret nothing

He’s so worried ahhhh  but Hanako is okay and they remembered that the ghost was in fact a ghost so risk no greater than a couple of ghost bruises

AHHHHH

Just. This whole page. It’s so precious. Look at them sharing a laugh together because they were being dummies and then Kou finding out that the thing Hanako was working so hard to get back because it looked important was his earring ahhhhhhh that’s so cute omg look at them!! I didn’t even noticed his earring was gone! (I checked again and he had it when the three of them were talking but it was already gone when he had his talk with Teru. I guess the mokke he had on his lap took it. That was a nice subtle detail)

Awww and he’s made his decision. He believes that Hanako is proof that there are good supernaturals so he won’t exorcise him. Hanako looks shocked and is asking him what made him change his mind since Kou had himself said that he was “the evil spirit of a murderer”. 

Kou says that he’s sorry because he didn’t know any better and that he’s sure that Hanako had his reason for what he did but-

...........He makes a fair point. Like, at this point we know very little about Hanako’s life and motives. The only fact that seems to be certain at this point is that he has killed someone when he was alive, but we don’t know any of the circumstances around it. He has had moments where he looked and acted with what appeared to be malice, like when he told Yashiro that crying wouldn’t solve anything, and when he pointed his knife at Kou during their first meeting and when he explained to them that scary experiences are the ones that stick in your memory the most. There’s been an underlying aura of danger in Hanako that’s impossible to ignore, there’s no denying that. But there’s still the fact that he has done everything in his power to protect Yashiro and now Kou in dangerous situations. So a part of me believes that there has to be a reasonable explanation for his actions; if we take the really angsty route I would guess that he did it as an act of self-defense or something like that. But yeah, “when is it right to kill someone?” is a very tricky question

............................ah. that underlying danger i mentioned? here it is again, back at full force.

But also the look on his eyes, while the swirls give off that crazy vibe, the wobbliness and his overall expression convey a very hopeless feeling, I don’t know, he just looks very distressed. To me it looks like he really doesn’t want to do this, but he also needs to prove his point to Kou

(ﾟдﾟ；)  (ﾟдﾟ；)  (ﾟдﾟ；)

Oh no  (ﾟдﾟ；)  (I stand corrected: I’ve spent only half of this chapter gushing about Kou, the other half I’ve been going “oh no” almost every time Teru appears)

And again: the quick switch from “pleasant charming” smile”to “I will destroy you” look is terrifying. This does not bode well oh man oh man next chapter is gonna be crazy and stressful

[yandere-daze]

Hello!! You might recognize me but I was wondering on your thoughts on my little fun idea about the yandere self-aware au for ensemble stars, so since I am a huge simp for Anzu (I'm on my knees for her /hj), I'm just imagining all of their reactions towards our favoritism towards Anzu and Anzu just taking it <3 Idk I just like making them jelly~

Heya! I absolutely do recognize you, I remember reading some of your twst works and really enjoying them! I´ve also seen you reblog my posts before, which I really gotta thank you for!☺️💕

I´m honestly really happy to see so many people simping for Anzu when that´s usually a really rare thing for the MCS of these kinds of games. There´s honestly so much potential for her so I´m more than happy to provide more simping material😏

gn reader

tw yandere, obsession, possessiveness, jealousy, self-deprecation, mention of kidnapping, mention of blood

The characters being jealous because you show clear favoritism toward Anzu

So very obviously, Anzu is going to be very happy that you favor her. You two share a special connection that no one else can compete with, so from her side you always were the most important person to her, but now she has the confirmation that you feel the same for her! It looks like all of her hard work of impressing you with her diligence has paid off! You can bet that she´s more motivated than ever when she does her work as a producer, knowing that her darling likes her more than anyone else. Hah, she can´t stop smiling and there´s a blush on her face whenever she thinks about it ( which is always, tbh).

Everyone knows Anzu as very modest but she´s actually very smug about being your favorite and she will mention it every chance she gets, finding it funny how jealous the idols get every time.

The others of course are in shambles. Trickstar is the most understanding one because they´ve been with Anzu longer than any other unit and they´re also the most normal ones in this AU. They understand why you may feel that way and they´re happy for her but deep down they´re still disappointed.

(Not going to mention every character´s reaction to this because that would be a huge amount of work, just a few that randomly came to mind)

Tsukasa is moping 100% of the time. Like yes, he understands why you may like Anzu ( I mean have you seen how much of a simp he is in-game), but since the day he learned that the person that was with him the entire time was actually you and not Anzu, he´s been so in love with you. And he´s tried so hard to try and court you even through the screen, he´s been nothing but a perfect gentleman, and yet he was beaten. Probably cries about it ngl, he´s so frustrated and kind of throws a tantrum when you aren´t there to see it

Speaking of tantrums! Tori is soooo not happy about this development. You´re supposed to like him the most! He´s the cutest idol in the world and he´s tried to make you feel extra special by giving you cute nicknames but that didn´t seem to work somehow? He´s very upset and he´s not going to hide it, even from you. You can expect him to make some snide comments about the producer when on the home screen. If you´re already in their world then he will still try to invite you over whenever you can and have tea parties with you, of course without Anzu, so he can try to monopolize your time. He´s going to make you see that he´s the best option here!

Izumi is very very pissy and moody, even more so than usual once he finds out about this. You like Anzu the most, the one person you didn´t even get to really talk to when you were playing the game? When he, a literal model, was right there and ready to give you some attention? Are you stupid or something? He definitely won´t just sit by and accept this, you know. He´s picky when it comes to choosing his partner and he´s already made the choice that you are the one for him. Who do you think you are, trying to deny him like that? He´s going to make sure that you come to your senses soon enough. If not, there´s always the option of kidnapping you in case you´re close <3

Mika is honestly just crying. He knows that he´s not good enough, he knows that he´s just a useless doll and could never hope to be on the same level as you, but against all odds, he still held onto a small sliver of hope that you may once consider him worthy of your love. He´s spent the last few months or even years, worshipping your very being and loving you from afar and now he finds out that you prefer Anzu over him or even Shu. He tries to accept it because it´s your will and he could never dare to defy you when you´re always right, but he´s so upset. If only he had done more, if only he had served you a bit better, maybe then you might have shown him mercy and chosen him. But that didn´t happen. How could he be so foolish to think that he deserves your love? He´s nothing without you, of no use at all! Mika might grow back to showing distaste for Anzu but this time it´s not because of Shu. No, he hates her for taking you away when he hadn´t even had enough time to improve himself so you could accept him. She´s not worthy of being with you either, you know?

Shu huffs and utters a snide remark when Anzu brags to him about being your favorite, but as soon as she leaves the room he just kind of breaks down. Not even Mika could console him right now, not that his unit mate is in an appropriate mental state himself. Shu just shuts himself in his room for days on end, no one even seeing his face once the entire time. He tries to throw himself into his work, sewing clothes until his fingers bleed but it´s not enough to fill the hole that has made its way into his heart. The creations that he made exactly to your liking, they weren´t enough. He still hasn´t grown enough as an artist to impress you and so his work is useless. In his desperation, he would rip apart the outfits he had designed previously. What did it matter if you didn´t like them anyway? He had to be better, he had to work hard to win back your favor from that devious woman. Shu is not coming out of that room until he´s satisfied with the new outfits he is making until they are utterly flawless. Deep down, he´s scared that he will never be enough but the only one he voices these thoughts to is Mademoiselle

[dangan-meme-palace]

Yandere DRV3 Girls

I shoulda posted this like a month ago I’m so sorry

Boys can be found right here

(Trigger warnings for the following: Kidnapping, Stalking, Non-con elements/mentions, Non-con drug use, Implied Torture, Physical/Emotional Abuse, Manipulation, Gas Lighting, and Implied Murder)

Kirumi Tojo

I love her don't make me do this

Fell for you when you made an effort to lighten her load 

Definitely one of the more controlling yanderes

You thought you'd have someone you could order around? Foolish.

She wants what's best for you and so she just kinda takes care of everything for you

Which sounds great!

Until you realise she thinks she knows you better than you do

Which isn’t even wrong because she has stalked you intensely

Stalking aside she's gonna try and make your life better whether you like or not

This includes forcing you to eat healthier, exercise, etc. etc. 

Probably uses the Mom Voice™

She won't take no for an answer

Tsumugi Shirogane

Oh boy. Look away children.

Okay so there's 2 ways she’ll become obsessed with you 

1: You are really optimistic and hopeful

2: You are emotionally susceptible to abuse

Yeah this is gonna get really fucked up really quick

Sorry Tsumugi fans

If Option #1 is true for you get ready to be kidnapped

She's Despair so she's obviously gonna wanna kill your hope with no remorse

Just saying, killing your hope might include making you put on humiliating cosplays and posting pictures online of you in them

She also might use those pictures as blackmail

Depends on her mood tbh

If Option #2 sounds more like you then prepare for the stereotypical controlling yandere

She'll slowly get more and more controlling with you until you start to think there's no way out

Which is true

There is no way out

She won't let you leave

But… do you really want to leave her? 

She's all you have now.

She keeps you as a pet :’)

Tenko Chabashira

Fell for you when you showed fierce enthusiasm for something you love

She finds it cute as hell and she can't help but fall for you

She's more of an obsessive than an aggressive yandere surprisingly 

How could she hurt her one true love?!?!?

Gushes about you to all her friends

Takes pictures of you doing cute things like sleeping, showering, and eating

IT'S NOT CREEPY IT'S CUTE!!!!

Will defend your honor without any hesitation 

If anyone even makes it seem like they don't want you around or don't appreciate you enough she is going off

She'll talk about every little thing that you do in a reverent tone of voice

It's like she worships you or something

Halfway through her 50th “I love them how dare you!” speech you notice something

She's talking about stuff you've never done around her, stuff you do alone

How would she know about any of that??

If you leave it alone you'll be fine but if you don't….

She won't hurt you but you're definitely not going outside anytime soon :)

Which is fine by her!

More time to spend with you! As an added bonus you're living with her now!

However, all good things must come to an end

A certain detective was determined to solve your case

And his leads all pointed to her

*thinking emoji*

She knew he was onto her

So she just… solved the problem

Permanently.

Rip Shuichi

Himiko Yumeno

She's like 8 you lolicons

Would totally lure you in with her magical loli powers

A well placed “Nyehhhh I can't reach this, can you grab it for me?” and a tired yawn here and there

Yeah, she's got manipulation down to a science

Anything to spend time with you

But it's not enough

She can't get enough of you

She wants more 

So whenever you leave her she'll follow you in secret

She hates that you have to leave in the first place

So, she uh,

Casts a spell on your lunch

Translation: she crushed up some sleeping pills and mixed the powder into your food

Luckily, she didn't give you too much

Unluckily, you're living with her now

And you're not leaving

It's all thanks to ~Maaaaaaggggiiiicc~

Angie Yonaga

“Oh my god, it's god?!?”

Nah, but she thinks Atua sent you to her as a gift

She saw you and it was like the stars fell from the heavens and became you

At least in her eyes

Immediately tries to get to know you and talk to you

She also makes a wax statue of you to put in her room

Might make a body pillow of you ngl 

Talks as if you're already together

It honestly surprises everyone when you say you're not

She's super confused

How could you not be hers?? Atua sent you to her?? You're hers??

Decides that you just don't know that you were sent to her

Silly s/o~

Definitely a kidnapper

She'll frequently ask you questions and if you answer wrong she disciplines (read: tortures) you

Conditions you to love her

God dammit Angie why must you be so fucked up

Kaede Akamatsu

Don't make me do this to her please..

Sigh

She most likely fell for you when she realized how passionate you were

Especially if it's anything to do with music

Partial to singing but it doesn't really matter as long as you put your feelings into it

She falls ass over elbows for you when she accidentally heard you practicing

She's so shy around you it's kind of painful to watch

She's normally so confident but as soon as you're around she's quiet and flustered

The thing is she doesn't really mind that feeling

In fact she wants to feel it more

So she starts hanging around you more and more and spending all of her free time with you and just staying close to you in general 

Absolutely idolizes you

Thinks everything you do is cute and adorable and oh god she loves you so much

She starts getting nasty with everyone else though; she kinda acts like her pregame self

Why would she want to spend time with them when she could spend time with someone as amazing as you??

Everything seems more irritating and boring without you around

She comes to a sudden realization one night when she was thinking about her feelings

She wants a songbird

You can't let birds out of their cages or they'll fly away from you forever

She won't lose you.

She can't.

So she steals you away in the middle of the night

She treats you like a princess as soon as you wake up

Might ask you to sing for her from time to time but won't push you

She understands that you're going to have to adjust to being her songbird

That's fine!

Or so she thought

But she's just so sick of seeing you inch away from her in fear

She's Kaedone with your shit

How dare you be so ungrateful!!

She gives you everything and you still treat her like a criminal!!

There's nothing wrong with wanting to keep you!!

Demands affection from you

Not afraid to punish you

She hates it though

She just wants you to love her so why do you keep making her hurt you?!

She doesn't want to!! She promises!!

So please!! Just love her already!!

She hates how you fake your smiles

She hates how you flinch before you wrap your arms around her

She hates that you don't love her

But she hates the thought of you leaving so much more

So every day

She keeps trying to get you to love her

And every day 

You don't

:’)

Maki Harukawa

She might be a little too good at this yandere thing….

So, she's The Ultimate Assassin, meaning she kills people all stealthy-like

So I'd say she's pretty good at stalking her prey

Not to say that you're her prey but… that's exactly what I'm saying

You can't go anywhere without feeling eyes on you

She's way too nervous to talk to you

So she tries to make up for it with kind gestures 

Like stabbing people who walk too slow in the halls

They're all scum anyways

No one could ever be as kind and caring as you

So who cares if they die

They're nothing compared to you

<3

Have you seen her in-game?? literally she's borderline yandere already

She’s super suspicious of you leaving her though

She knows that her job isn’t the most well-liked career and is terrified that you’ll find out and never want to go near her

And that just isn’t allowed

So she keeps it a secret for as long as she can

Until you eventually find out where exactly all of your friends have gone

If you’re okay with it (read: too terrified to move) you’ll most likely live through that encounter

If not… well...

She always thought you were cuter than any doll anyways <3

She even picks out a cute outfit for your corpse :’D

Miu Iruma

I live for this bitch

She's another yandere too shy to talk to you

She tries! She really does! Its It's just you make her so nervous

Y’all know how she gives Shuichi food with her hair in it? Imagine that x100

A good yandere to compare her to is actually Anna from Shimoneta

Just watch this tbh

https://youtu.be/nM6fcg6VunM

She, like Anna, has made food with little bits of her in it

Gross.

Just buy some damn chocolates you absolute madwoman

She also tries to impress you with things she invents

You’re her latest muse so it’s only fair that you get to try out her inventions firsthand

If you don’t want them she is crushed

She tries so hard, the poor thing

I imagine that if she went off the deep end it would go one of two ways

She either A: Becomes obsessed with trying to impress you. Losing sleep just so she could try and make the best possible present. This leads to her stalking you on and offline because she needs to find out your likes and dislikes. It’s normal to try and find out what someone would like as a present right? So it’s no big deal. She would also bug your house and clothes just to listen to you.

Or B: Straight up kidnaps you and locks you in her lab. Now you have no choice but to try out her inventions. Don’t worry though! She only picks out the best ones for you! She eventually is able to trick herself into thinking that you enjoy all of this and were just playing really hard to get. It’s like she can’t even hear you anymore...