#in january once i was back i wanted to meet up w him but he rejected both times bc he didnt like meeting up in person and preferred texting | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

janetbrown711 · 1 year

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Runs in the Family

Career Day is arriving at Megapolis City Academy and MK really, really wants Pigsy to present… but that would mean he has to ask him, which is the last thing he wants to do, but when one kid starts bragging, MK knows he has to.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 8.5 Part 9 Part 10 Part 10.5 Part 11 Part 12

Ao3 Link

~Two Weeks Until Winter Break~

Tap tap, tap tap, tap tap–

MK couldn’t stop tilting his pencil back and forth between two fingers, hitting it against the hard surface of the bar at Pigsy’s noodles. He had completed his homework for the day, but there was still one paper that laid in front of him, taunting him, begging him to ask Pigsy to volunteer, knowing he’d be met with a brush off or some lame excuse.

He knew he should have more faith in Pigsy– but old habits die hard and well… it wasn’t like Pigsy was completely without his vices.

“Are you still looking at that?” Mei glanced over at her friend and gave him a half-concerned, half-annoyed look. “I told you Career Day is a total joke– nobody’s parents go.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know– but–” MK glanced at the chef, who was busy muttering to himself as he spilled some soy sauce on his shirt.

Mei glanced at the chef too, then back at MK. “He’ll be too busy.”

“Y-yeah, I know,” MK looked down. “It’s just– well, you know– Qiang said his dad would go so like–”

“His dad is in the Ministry of Education, he doesn’t count,” Mei gave a nasty look at her homework. “ ‘Sides, Piggy isn’t our dad.”

MK sighed.

Mei didn’t know, and MK suspected Pigsy was too drunk to remember, but he knew he had called Pigsy dadsy at the Mid Autumn Festival. It made him embarrassed to think about– calling the person who’d been your guardian for only six months dad was– cringy? MK didn’t know, but what he did know was that he was never going to call him that again, despite kinda sorta wanting to.

Tap tap, tap tap, tap tap.

“What about Mr. Tang? Is he busy?” MK asked, but he didn’t really mean it– he wanted Pigsy.

Mei looked around the restaurant, and as MK did, he too realized that the scholar was nowhere to be found.

It was… unsettling.

“Order up!” Pigsy suddenly shouted, hitting the bell.

“Piggy– where’s Mr. Tang?” Mei asked.

“Oh, he’s submitting PhD applications today and ‘studying’ for finals– said he'll be busy for a month or so, so his visits'll be less frequent,” Pigsy frowned a little but brushed it off like it was something he’d already accepted (or was at least trying to).

“Rats,” MK sighed, flopping his head onto the countertop.

“Woah, what’s got you down, kid?” Pigsy laughed a little, though there was genuine concern there.

MK’s heart raced as he swiped the paper under the counter and shrugged. “I-i was– um– you know– just–”

Pigsy raised an eyebrow, “Homework giving you trouble?”

“No-! No, not at all, ahaha,” MK half lied. His math homework was still incredibly difficult but he just gave up halfway through like he usually did until he’d meet with his tutor at lunch.

“Then what’re you hiding?” Pigsy asked, and MK’s face went pale.

“W-w-wellllll– um–” MK looked at Mei, who equally didn’t know what to do.

MK quickly crumpled the paper and shoved it into his jacket pocket and shook his head. “It’s nothing, I was just– it’s weird without Mr. Tang here.”

“Can’t deny that,” Pigsy gave MK a once-over before shrugging and going back to his work. MK sighed breath of relief and once again rested his head against the counter.

Mei looked at her friend and frowned. “Sorry MK, I just don’t wanna see you get hurt.”

MK glanced at Pigsy and slowly nodded. “Y-yeah, I… I know. Thanks.”

Mei gave a tight-lipped smile before going back to her work, while all MK could think about was the boulder of anxiety weighing in his jacket pocket.

.o0o.

~One Week Until Winter Break (And Career Day)~

January was a stupid month. Cold weather, dead plants, and frankly too much ice and mud water. MK had already nearly broken his nose twice from face planting on ice (thankfully not in front of Pigsy– or else he’d probably have a heart attack).

Tang only visited the restaurant once a week because of his studies, so MK and Mei really only saw him whenever he was there or Pigsy decided to drop off some food at his place (“to help him study”). The restaurant felt emptier without his presence, but it was just going to have to do for now.

But MK wasn’t at the restaurant right now– he was in school.

In the locker room for gym again.

Which meant–

“Hey Xiao-naodai!” Qiang called for him from across the room, causing heads to turn.

MK turned around in a totally “cool” and “casual” and not at all fearful manner.

“Is your ‘daddy pig’ gonna show up for career day?” Qiang sneered.

“Oh– well, uh–”

“Cuz I bet he isn’t,” Qiang smirked.

MK grit his teeth.

“Yeah, I bet your daddy pig is too lazy and fat to bother showing up– and too poor to send anyone else,” The bully and his friends snickered.

“Mr. Pigsy isn’t too poor for anything– he doesn’t pick us up because he’s a busy guy,” MK retorted.

Qiang rolled his eyes. “You know, almost everyone else gets picked up in a limo or stretch or town car here– everyone knows you’re poor.”

MK’s eye twitched as he tried to simply shrug it off like Pigsy and Tang had suggested. “What’s that gotta do with Career Day anyways? Is anyone else’s parents going?” He looked around the locker room and some of the other boys sank back.

“It ain’t about them, Xiao-naodai– it’s about you and your fat ugly pig dad,” Qiang remained unwavering.

“Stop talking about him like that,” MK turned away and tried to focus on getting his gym shoes on.

“You know what? I’m glad that hell swine isn’t coming– I don’t wanna be scarred for life by his ugly face,” Qiang said casually and his friends all laughed.

MK felt pure rage ignite in his chest as he tied his laces with a trembling fist.

Stupid friggin’ Qiang– what does he know? He’s just a stupid, dumb friggin idiot with a stupid face and stupid hair and stupid brain.

“In fact, I’m glad that my dad will be going, so he can show poor little Xiaotian what a good parent looks like,” Qiang announced extra loud.

MK immediately sprang up and got into Qiang’s face. “You know what Qiang? Mr. Pigsy is going to career day, and he’s gonna talk all about having a real job that isn’t built on exploitation, and actually matters,” MK announced.

Qiang smirked. “I bet he won’t even show.”

“And I bet your dad doesn’t even love you,” MK thought bitterly, but managed to keep his mouth shut since Pigsy didn’t need him getting in another fight.

“He will,” MK said instead.

“We’ll see,” Qiang chuckled, before one of his goons gave MK a shove into the lockers and they headed out to gym.

MK was going to destroy them in dodgeball.

.o0o.

~Same Day~

MK didn’t tell Mei what happened in the locker room, knowing it would end the same way as his first day at school did, but it wasn’t like he hid his anger and aggression well. Heck– he was stomping so hard he was practically splitting the concrete and ice as he and Mei walked to Pigsy’s Noodles.

When he got to the actual restaurant, he threw his bag onto the bar and rested his head on his arms as he thought about how stupid Qiang was and how he was totally gonna get Pigsy to go– but he had a stronger thought that he wouldn’t be able to and Qiang would win and everything would go from bad to worse.

“Woah, woah– what’s up with him?” He heard Pigsy ask through the pounding in his ears.

Mei didn’t give an audible response and instead of trying to guess what was happening there, he tried formulating some kind of plan.

He could lie. He could say that it wasn’t career day– that headmaster Jiangxi wanted to talk with him. But that would mean Pigsy wouldn’t be prepared and it’d be a surprise and MK had the feeling he wouldn’t like that much.

He could not tell him anything and make Mr. Tang go, but that wouldn’t solve the Qiang problem, plus Mr. Tang isn’t his dad either and would bring a lot of attention and something told MK Mr. Tang probably didn’t want to deal with primary school bullies either. And that was even if Mr. Tang could go, which due to his sparse appearances, he probably couldn’t. Whatever a PhD was, Mr. Tang needed it real bad if he was willing to skip Pigsy’s Noodles for it.

MK could also tell the truth to Pigsy– which MK didn’t know what he’d do with. He’d probably say no– he hates the hoity-toity and their rich little events– and Mei said most parents didn’t go anyways (but of course Qiang’s dad goes– ugh).

But he could also say “why not” with a smile and sign the slip without a second thought. He’d then prepare and talk about it with MK and he’d get in his work uniform and open the shop late and he’d make Qiang eat his words like they were a bowl of biangbiang.

Then again, the kids knew what chefs did. They all had their own private chefs, in their private kitchens in their giant homes and mansions and–

MK couldn’t do this.

He tried to stop thinking after that, just closing his eyes and taking in the scent of noodles when a hand touched his back, causing him to jump.

“Hey-! I– right, sorry,” Pigsy apologized quickly and MK relaxed at the sight of him. Pigsy cleared his throat a bit before asking, “So… uh… how was school?”

MK looked at his jacket and shrugged, pulling the zipper up and down a bit before trying to swerve back to his bag.

“Hey.” Pigsy made MK turn back around before he could. “Do you have somethin’ you need to talk about?”

MK shook his head and kept looking at his zipper.

Pigsy sighed and sat on Tang’s empty stool.

“Is it that Qiang kid?”

MK tensed a bit and upon realizing Pigsy saw that, he croaked a weak, “Yeah, he’s a jerk, but it’s cool.”

Pigsy raised an eyebrow, “What does that mean?”

MK shrugged again, trying to turn over, but Pigsy planted a firm hand on his shoulder and didn’t let go.

“MK, did that d– jerk say anything to you?” He looked serious.

“It doesn’t matter– it was stupid,” he lied, but his guardian clearly wasn’t buying it.

MK chewed his lip and looked to Mei for emotional support, but she was doing her work (though clearly listening if her death grip on her pencil was any indication).

No way out of it now…

“Well– um– there’s this event happening at school– Career Day– and–” MK stopped speaking when he noticed Mei perked up a bit and looked at him with concern and a slight shake to her head.

Pigsy looked at her, then back at MK, brow furrowed.

“And…?” The chef asked.

“A-and Qiang– well…” MK tried to ignore Mei best he could. “–Well he said he– uh– bet you wouldn’t go…”

Pigsy let go of MK’s shoulder. “Is… that it?”

“Well he called you names too, and other stupid junk, but uh– yeah,” MK looked at the ground.

Pigsy huffed at that, and crossed his arms while he thought to himself for a minute.

“You never mentioned a ‘Career Day’.”

“Oh– well– uhhhh–” MK didn’t want to out his bestie but didn’t have a better excuse.

Pigsy’s face fell a little before he shook his head. “Nevermind– just– do you… want me to go?”

“W-well– yeah-! But also– like– you don’t have to– it would really just to show up Qiang which isn’t very nice and I don’t know– would they let you? They’d have to, right? But what if kids bully you, and–”

“Kid, I’m an adult, I can handle snide comments from a couple third graders,” He said with good humor, but there was still something holding him back. “Do you want me to go?”

MK didn’t respond and Pigsy looked at Mei.

“Mei? Do you want me to go?”

“You don’t have to,” She tried to play cool. “Almost nobody’s parents go– I don’t even know why they have this stupid thing– it doesn’t matter– and everyone knows what chefs do because–”

“Because they all have private chefs? And you think it's embarrassing to have a chef guardian?” Pigsy accused and Mei froze.

“I-i– I don’t– I-i mean—” Mei stuttered.

“Right,” Pigsy sighed. “I get it kid.”

“W-wait, no– “I-i– if you wanna go– I’m just sayin’ – I’m sayin’ my p-parents never–”

“Oh…” MK said, and the restaurant got quiet– which was easy since it was just the three of them.

“So you don’t want me to go?” Pigsy asked the girl.

“I-i’m not saying you can’t but like– no one does, so like– I-i mean you can but– I-i–” Mei was starting to tear up.

MK felt really awkward as Pigsy wrapped the girl into a soft hug. It was sweet, but hadn’t this conversation been about him? Or was that selfish? And was it also selfish to say that MK still wanted him to go? Was that weird? Was it too weird for Mei?

After a bit Pigsy repeated his question and Mei shrugged.

“It’s whatever MK wants,” She sniffled and all eyes turned to him.

Haha…

“MK?” Pigsy asked.

“I mean– Mei’s right that it’s like– for parents, but like– UGH– is it bad that I wanna show up Qiang?” MK groaned and dramatically leaned against the bar again.

Pigsy laughed. “Nah, kids a dweebus. Plus, maybe I can talk to his folks and we can resolve things… maybe… probably not… almost definitely not but hey– it sounds– fun, right?” Pigsy didn’t sound like even he believed that.

MK shrugged and dug through his bag for the crumpled up hand out and gave it to his demonic guardian, who read over it with a serious face.

“It does say the focus is on advice for running businesses, and what am I if not CEO of Pigsy’s Noodles?” Pigsy joked and Mei laughed genuinely.

“Yeah– I guess you do have a point,” She giggled and wiped away her tears, and Pigsy looked at her fondly.

“I dunno what a CEO is but I-i would like it if you came,” MK finally decided.

“Well then I guess I’ll see what I can do,” Pigsy ruffled MK’s hair just as a customer came in and they all went back to their normal routines.

.o0o.

~Three Days Until Career Day~

MK had no idea what Pigsy was gonna do for Career Day, and a million questions about it kept him up at night.

MK figured it’d be nice– but he also didn’t know how Pigsy was in front of a crowd. Did he get stage fright? Would they even let him talk? He was a demon– nobody else’s parents–/guardians were demons– he couldn’t help but worry this would all go disastrously and on top of that Mr. Tang still wasn’t at the restaurant regularly and MK was really worried about how that was affecting Pigsy too.

But then Qiang would say something stupid and MK knew he couldn’t back down now, even if it felt like setting Pigsy up to fail…

He really, really, really hoped Pigsy wouldn’t end up hating him for making him do this.

…And that nobody called Pigsy his dad.

.o0o.

~One Hour Until Career Day~

MK’s leg couldn’t stop bouncing if it wanted to as he ate his breakfast of rice porridge.

Today’s the day.

Pigsy was going to talk all about having his own restaurant in comparison to all these busy business people who had chains in Korea, Japan, Nepal, and even in America.

MK wasn’t embarrassed at that, but he was worried Pigsy was– or if Qiang and his stupid mouth would bring it up. He didn’t want his d– guardian to be embarrassed (guardian, MK, he isn’t your dad).

UGH, why are emotions so stupid and confusing???

“You alright kid? You look like you’re about to be sick,” Pigsy remarked, wiping a counter.

MK sighed. “What if Qiang says somethin’ stupid in class? Like– about you? Or what if someone else does? What do we do?”

Pigsy thought for a second before shrugging, “Handle it calm but firm– after all, you’re almost done with the semester, that means this mess is almost over.”

“Well, except for next year and the year after that and the year after that and yadda yadda,” Mei pointed out, eating some porridge but quickly fanning her mouth when it was too hot.

“Yeah true,” Pigsy pushed forward a glass of cold tea and Mei quickly chugged it, “But I don’t think Headmaster Jiangxi is on the edge of his seat waiting to put you and MK in another class with Qiang.”

“Thank the great sage,” MK half-joked.

Pigsy looked at him funny before shaking his head and laughing. “Are we sure you and Tang aren’t the same person?”

MK blinked.

“Nevermind,” Pigsy shook his head again. “I’m just sayin’–” He muttered something under his breath, pinching his forehead before just saying, “Finish eating– we gotta head out soon.”

Pigsy went to his room to finish getting ready (or at least, MK assumed so) and MK was left with the still sinking feeling in his stomach.

“This is gonna be okay, right?” He turned to Mei for assurance.

Mei looked at him with a slight grimace. “Piggy has tough skin, right?”

“Yeah– yeah! He can totally handle punk kids and punk adults,” MK tried agreeing. “He’s real brave.”

“Yeah, he is,” Mei agreed with a firm nod.

“He stood up to tiger demons! And to meanie principals and rude customers and cops! He’s got this,” MK was finally starting to believe it.

“Yeah– he does,” Mei smiled to herself.

Today was going to be totally fine.

.o0o.

~Career Day~

MK forgot about how weirdly people looked at him whenever he was with Pigsy at school– which was weird because it had been four months since he adopted them so like– they really should be used to it.

Pigsy seemed used to it at least, which made MK feel a little bit braver– in fact, he didn’t even try to hold his guardian’s hand, shoving it into his hoodie pocket.

Okay– that wasn’t the bravest thing he could’ve done, but he didn’t want Pigsy to know he was nervous– he needed him to believe MK believed in him. After all, it was his fault he was even here in the first place so the least he could do was put on a brave face.

Stopping by the office for Pigsy’s guest pass was at least good because it meant getting away from the gawking kids, but Pigsy always seemed kinda tense in there.

“Mr. Zhu?” The front desk lady looked at their guardian before typing something into her computer quickly– “Headmaster Jiangxi isn’t expecting a meeting with you today–”

“Yeah, I know. I’m here for Career Day,” Pigsy informed with a slight huff.

“Oh,” The lady jumped a little. “Well– did you fill out all of the forms?”

Mei rolled her eyes, “Duhhh– that’s why he’s here.”

Pigsy gave Mei a look MK couldn’t read while the desk lady looked at Pigsy in annoyance. She then typed some more things before the familiar clunking of a printer went off and Pigsy was handed a sticker that said “Visitor’s Pass” in big bold letters.

“Thanks,” The demon forced politeness.

The lady just nodded back and went to her work, which was rather rude to MK.

Pigsy rolled his eyes. “Let’s go you two,” he said and went to the door, so Mei and MK followed.

MK was glad when he realized career day was isolated by grade levels and only held in their particular classrooms, meaning it wasn’t like Pigsy was going to present in front of the entire school. Just in front of Qiang and his goons, proving once and for all Pigsy was a good dad (and probably better than Qiang’s too).

“Mister Qi, Miss Long, and– ah, I see Mr. Zhu made it after all,” Mrs. Yang looked at their guardian with a strained smile.

MK frowned. “I said he would.”

“And here he has,” Mrs. Yang kept that expression on her face, before writing something on a piece of paper. “You can wait over there, Mr. Zhu, while the children may take their seats.”

Pigsy nodded, heading over silently and so MK and Mei just kinda shrugged and walked to their seats too.

When he looked around the room, he could see Qiang sitting in the second row, chatting with some of his dumb idiot friends, not even noticing Pigsy sitting in the corner awkwardly next to two other parents.

“You know staring at him isn’t gonna help, right?” Mei snarked, trying to balance a pencil on top of another one on her desk.

“Pshhh,” MK waved her off, but did stop looking at Qiang. “I just– you know– I want to make sure he knows Pigsy’s a good– guardian,” MK caught himself.

“Qiang’s a punk who doesn’t know what’s good for ‘im,” Mei remarked as she successfully added another pencil to the stack.

MK snorted, “you got that right.”

“Oh MK, MK, MK, MK,” Mei shook her head, “When will you ever learn that I am always right?” she said as the stack of pencils fell over.

“Tell that to your spelling test,” MK laughed and Mei smacked him over the head.

“Miss Long,” Mrs. Yang scolded from the front of the room.

“S-sorry!” Mei immediately folded her hands on her desk and kept her eyes low.

MK glanced at Pigsy who was looking at Mrs. Yang with a frustrated look before he shook his head and went to a handout he was given.

“Well at least Pigsy can tell Mrs. Yang doesn’t like you,” MK whispered, but Mei didn’t say another word.

This time when MK looked at Qiang, he was looking right back with a stupid smirk and thumbs up.

Great sage above, MK hated that kid.

Not much happened in the next five minutes, other than more kids shuffling in, plus one more parent, but that seemed to be the last of it.

"Alright, well now that everyone's here, let's get started," Mrs. Yang smiled pleasantly at the adults in the room– all four of them for an entire class of thirty (Mei really wasn't kidding when she said next to nobody's parents bothered doing this).

First speaker was some kid’s mom talking about being the CEO of some kind of washing machine company, which was a total snooze fest so instead MK doodled the Monkey King fighting sentient washing machines.

The second person was another kid’s dad talking about expanding businesses overseas and how something something “buy out the little guys” “cheap labor is key” something something, but he did hand out candy so that was okay… MK figured.

Again, he just doodled the Monkey King fighting evil candy cops.

And then it was Pigsy’s turn, so MK put his notebook away to give his d– guardian his full attention.

“Right… well… the name’s Pigsy, of Pigsy’s Noodles downtown on the west side,” The demon cleared his throat a little, as some kid’s faces twisted at the mention of the west side.

“Yeah, I know, it ain’t exactly glamorous like any of these guy’s hoity-toity jobs, but it’s an honest days work making things with my own hands,” He rolled his eyes.

One of the kids scrunched their nose and raised their hands, “What do you mean?”

Pigsy snorted, “I’m a chef, kid, I make everything other than the vegetables with my two hands from scratch.”

Another kid raised their hand, “So someone doesn’t just do it for you?”

“Nah, it’s more fun and personal that way– more honest than fast food, and something you can pass down from generation to– uh–” he glanced at MK briefly– “generation.”

Another kid raised their hand. “So like my grandma’s jade bracelets?”

Pigsy’s face melted a little bit. “Yeah– like that,” he smiled.

“Woah– that’s so cool!” The kid beamed.

“Guang, raise your hand next time,” Miss Yang disciplined.

Pigsy looked like he was going to say something but then Qiang raised his hand.

But Pigsy didn’t recognize Qiang and therefore called on him with no hesitation.

“So like– all you do is run some dingy restaurant nobody’s ever heard of? Is that because you’re poor?” Qiang bit.

Pigsy looked at him flatly. “You know, building somethin’ from scratch takes hard work and dedication. It ain’t as easy as signing a check and suddenly intaking billions of dollars just because you felt like it. And chains are sell-outs anyways, I’d rather hang onto my dignity.”

Qiang laughed, “Demon’s don’t have dignity, all they know how to do is steal and wreak havoc in the west side.”

Mei growled while MK glared at him.

“Tell me how buying out a company and laying off thousands of workers for no other reason than profit increase ain’t stealin’.” Pigsy dared and a hush fell over the room.

Qiang glanced at his father, before deciding to say, “Because it’s for the good of the company.”

“A company ain’t nothing without its workers,” Pigsy pushed.

“Alright, well that’s enough out of Mr. Zhu,” Mrs. Yang smiled that fake angry smile adults always had. “Now, for our most honored guest, Mr. Tao from the Ministry of Education.”

“Well now, that was a truly… colorful report there, now wasn’t it?” Qiang’s father walked up as Pigsy sat down and muttered to himself. “Now, it’s like I always say, I believe it’s important to hear stories from all walks of life, so that way students can know what is wrong and what is right for themselves.”

MK frowned at that. The words sounded right, but there was something about his smile and confidence that made him feel like he was missing some kind of implication.

Qiangs dad continued to talk on and on about the government and why his job was impactful to the school and how he hoped his son and other students followed in his path towards working for the government or something like that.

MK didn’t really care, doodling the Monkey King fighting off evil cops and Qiang and his stupid dad. And also some doodles of him eating a bowl of Pigsy’s noodles.

He doodled quite a lot actually, and for awhile it seemed like Mr. Tao would never shut up until it was suddenly time for lunch and the students lined up before heading out into the halls while the adults were to head out to their busy business jobs.

MK was towards the back of the line, and just as the door closed he could hear Mr. Tao requested to speak to Pigsy and so immediately halted in his tracks to stay by the door and eavesdrop.

…Yeah okay not his best behavior, but like– sue him.

“Mr. Zhu, you have such a… colorful background and personality.” Mr. Tao “complimented”.

“...Yeah. Thanks.” Pigsy reciprocated.

“I’m not just referring to what you shared with the class, Mr. Zhu.”

A pause.

“Look, I–” Pigsy stuttered.

The door suddenly swung open and the other two adults MK forgot were even there exited the room– MK hiding in the corner where the door didn’t hit the wall, so he could continue to listen.

“...I was– I was a lot younger– kids make mistakes– I wasn’t–”

“Mistakes can easily be passed down onto impressionable youth, as I’m very sure you’re aware. After all, it was your daughter that broke my son’s nose, no?”

“Y– well– I–” Pigsy stuttered.

“I think it would be wise if you didn’t come by this school again, for the children’s sake, understood?”

“I–... Not even drop off..?”

“Mr. Zhu, you’ve mysteriously inherited an enormous amount of wealth. I highly suggest actually using some of it on a limo or a taxi, instead of hoarding it like some– well…”

Silence.

“Mr. Zhu, I highly suggest that if you want your children to stay enrolled in any school on this side of the country that you keep your ‘demonic influences’ to a minimum– especially to the more innocent students here.”

The demon growled. “MK and Mei are plenty–”

“You know you were lucky my wife and I did not press charges for the assault, Mr. Zhu– but now you are lucky to be allowed to still give your children an education, are we understood?”

More silence.

“...Yes.”

“Good.”

A pause.

“Have a good day, Mr. Zhu.”

Pigsy didn’t reply.

The door swung open once more and Qiang’s dad walked out with a pleasant smile and briefcase in hand like nothing had even happened.

Pigsy stayed inside, and MK was far too scared to try and talk to him, instead using his folding skills to hug his knees to his chest and wait for his guardian to emerge.

But instead of him leaving, MK heard a chair squeak against the tile and…

Crying.

Pigsy was crying.

And soon enough MK was too because this was all his fault.

He just had to show up Qiang, didn’t he?! He was so stupid! Stupid MK, stupid MK, stupid MK– he never thought things through. Impulsive little brat– selfish too– what was he doing making this all about him– he should be sad for pigsy– why did his brain always make things about him…

MK stayed there, sniffling as quiet as a ghost, until the cries from inside the classroom silenced, and he heard the chair scrape again. Quickly, MK wiped his eyes and stood once more just encase Pigsy did see him, and came up with a quick lie too.

The door didn’t swing for a long time, though if MK focused he thought maybe he could hear the typing noise his guardian’s new fancy phone made when you pushed buttons.

Then, Pigsy gave a long sigh, before taking a deep breath and opening the door.

He had on his bomber jacket now, his hands buried in the pockets and his head low in a way MK didn’t like and wasn’t sure he ever noticed before.

It… it frightened him.

“P… pigsy?”

MK didn’t know why he spoke– he was supposed to be trying not to get caught–

But he did.

Pigsy’s head shot straight up in alarm before he turned to MK– his hands immediately going out of his pockets and his head much higher.

“MK– what are– what are you doin’ there?” His guardian forced a smile while MK studied the puffiness of his eyes.

“I forgot my notebook in my desk and wanted to draw while we were in the play yard,” MK lied with uncharacteristic ease.

“How long have you been standing there?” Pigsy asked sheepishly.

“Mr. Tao said hi as I went down the hall,” MK lied again.

Pigsy sighed a breath of relief. “Okay, well– thanks for inviting me, kid,” he sighed with a slight smile.

MK tilted his head, “Why? Qiang and– others were mean.”

“Sometimes it’s just nice to be invited to things, kiddo,” Pigsy shrugged with a more genuine small smile. “You’ll get it when you’re older, I think.”

“Oh… okay,” MK managed to smile too.

Pigsy nudged the kids shoulder a bit playfully before standing up straight and cracking his back.

“I gotta get headed to work if I wanna make it before lunch rush,” Pigsy noticed the time. “You two gonna be okay out there?”

“I… yeah, we’re okay,” MK bobbed his head.

“Alright, I’ll see you ‘round the restaurant– don’t let that Qiang punk get to you, okay?” Pigsy advised.

“Yeah– yeah, I won’t,” MK promised, trying to mask how he hurt.

Pigsy looked at MK softly.

“You’re a good kid, MK.”

MK blinked.

“I– uh– thank you… Pigsy,” He didn’t know what to do and so bowed a little.

Pigsy laughed and ruffled the kid’s hair before his hands went back into his pockets. “I’ll see you later.”

“See you,” MK saluted him, which brought a slight grimace to the demon, but he did it back before heading out into the polished halls.

Guilt swarmed MK as Pigsy disappeared around a corner as he recited his vow to never let Qiang get to him ever again.

He’d be the good little human boy he was supposed to be, unless he wanted something bad– very bad to happen to his guardian or Mei.

And he didn’t– because MK was a good kid…

Or at least, he wanted to be. And that started by keeping his promises.

MK promised to never let anything bad happen to Pigsy because of him, and to be a good, obedient boy who didn’t let Qiang or any other bullies get to him.

…

He had to.

#lego monkie kid #lmk #dadsy #mk lmk #pigsy lmk #mei lmk #minor freenoodles #not quite a happy ending #anxiety #mk is not okay lmaoooo #bro's got issues at the ripe age of 7 #and i made it owrse bc thta's my specialty

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machiroads · 9 months

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Machi's 2023 Year In Review

'23 was a bit of a wild one. A toast to the last twelve months (both in fandom and IRL) under the cut.

Fic

Here's what went out the door in '23:

Naruhata Noir

I started posting NN in December '22, about a month after finishing 9L. At one point last year I joked about finishing the entire thing in the week between Christmas and New years. Evidently, this did not happen for a variety of reasons:

A) A series of events occurring in my personal life that do not merit further detail that I will herein refer to as "the conga line of nonsense". That kicked off during last year's holiday season and bled into like...May. Which leads directly into:

B) Tears of the Kingdom came out. And;

C) A general loss of motivation in the project.

During the aforementioned Conga Line of Nonsense, I had a goal of finishing before TotK came out, but I only managed to cobble together another 4 chapters between January and May. After somehow managing weekly to biweekly chapters for 9L, NN was much more sporadic, and at one point I had people asking me if I was still alive. Which. sucked, since I generally strive to be a somewhat reliable person.

Once the TotK hyperfixation hit, I managed maaaaaaybe another 2 chapters before I finally got bored of grinding monsters to upgrade outfits. I did manage to meet the third self-imposed deadline of finishing before going to Japan for 2 weeks, so at least that's one W.

In addition to the distractions of Life, NN was more challenging to write for a few main reasons:

Aizawa is not the narrator. Look, I'm mature enough to acknowledge that he is Blorbo From My Shows, and everything I write wants to revolve around him. Taking a step back from that and trying to get into another character's head after spending 8 solid months on 9L was an adjustment. It took me a bit of time to find Shinsou's voice.

Most of the relationship dynamics in this fic are non-canonical, and pulled directly out of my ass. Shinsou's relationships with the Hottas are central to the back half of the fic, and his relationship with Mirko also becomes prominent at times. NONE OF THESE CHARACTERS HAVE EVER INTERACTED IN REAL LIFE I'M JUST SMASHING DOLLS TOGETHER LIKE I DID AS A 7 YEAR OLD.

Trying to parallel something I already wrote several months ago is hard. I wanted NN to make sense on its own, but also follow the relevant bits from 9L. This was next to impossible to accomplish without sounding clunky. Almost from the very beginning of the fic, the outsider's perspective of Aizawa's first steps, I felt the urge to change the dialogue because the story that I wanted to tell from Shinsou's perspective was different from the one I wanted to tell from Aizawa's perspective. I locked myself into that rigidity for a while, until I finally decided just to say fuck it at the end and modify the 9L dialogue slightly because the story had taken on a life of its own.

Erasermic took a major backseat in this one, but I still needed to scratch the itch, and I think that's why I ended up writing 2 emic one shots in between chapters.

I don't think a direct parallel spin-off is something I would try writing again, and the fic was probably a lot longer than it needed to be, but at the end of the day, I'm satisfied with the way it turned out, and I'm happy I was actually able to finish it this year.

Here's a collage of my inspo for Aizawa's apartment cobbled together from google maps and japanese real estate websites.

Being No One, Going Nowhere

The first of the 3 one shots that I put out this year, and a proof of concept that I can slap together 3k in a day and a half fever dream and call it a fic.

This one in particular was instigated by one of @o0fyuu0o's tweets that refused to leave me alone. And maybe also the two broken arms story from reddit, but you know, like, less incesty.

Mic was extremely pathetic in this one, which is immensely fun to write. Just a pathetic little meow meow. Sopping wet cat of a man.

College AU was fun to write, emboldened in part by @kyurilin's fic Stray. After being married to canon-verse for both 9L and NN, this was an exercise in just making shit up, and also living vicariously through the memories of the house I lived in for the better part of 2 years as an undergrad. I graduated 7 years ago and it is still crystallized in my memory.

A Tumultuous Sea, You and Me

I've been nursing a healthy crush on Pirate!Aizawa (or Paizawa, as the kids on JP Twit call him) since the Volume 35 character page came out in June '22. Paizawa even killed a 2 year long art block, that's how powerful he is. (Look!)

I do not remember what exactly spurned this one on, but it also got written in the span of about 2 days. I think I reread The Art of Drowning at some point this year, but I do not remember if it was during the writing frenzy, or sometime before it.

Aizawa gets to hold the meow meow card again in this one. His 2 sentence rivalry with Vlad is one of the best things I've ever written.

Of the 2 days I spent writing this, I probably spent 75% of that researching pirate ships. I used almost none of it, and have forgotten almost all of it by this point.

I feel like everyone that dips their toes into the realm of merpeople has a different interpretation on it, but I wanted to spend approximately 0 minutes on worldbuilding, so it's just kind of a chill coexistence between the pirates and the mermaids in this one lol. People were intrigued by said "worldbuilding" however and wanted more, but I think I've scratched the mer-pirate itch for now haha.

1966 Ford Nutstang GT350 Shelby

@kyurilin made a tumblr post that misspelled "mustang" as "nustang" and I skim-read it and saw "nutstang" and was like "you know what would be a terribad nickname for the car? Nutstang." At which point I immediately informed her, which led down the rabbit hole of a very loose RP (as it often does) and I decided YOU KNOW WHAT? I SHOULD JUST TURN THIS INTO A CRACK FIC.

At which point I had to sort of construct a loose plot around the entire bonkers concept. Nemuri held a key role in the pseudo-RP, but I ended up wanting to keep the fic tight and her role was mostly cut. But rest assured she is there in spirit, though, judging.

The plush nutsack is just a bastardization of a kangaroo ballsack coinpurse I saw in a Crap Souvenirs From Around The World calendar I had many years back that has imprinted on my memory. At no point did I seek out visual reference for it, and neither should you. It is up to the reader's imagination.

On the topic of bastardizations, the reappearing nutsack plotline is borrowed from the drawfee gnome saga.

Mic yelling GOOD MORNING and Aizawa banging his head on the underside of his desk is S tier slapstick.

PEOPLE MADE ART????

Some wonderful listeners readers are still making art for 9L, and we have been blessed with two beautiful new pieces this year:

Mic and Eri's selfie, from @kaleidoscopedrawsjpg

The Only One Bed scene, from @guiltyfixations

@obsessed-dragon also drew the photo of Shinsou holding Miso from Naruhata Noir, and Black Spider Eyes drew Aizawa dangling out the window from Tumultuous Sea.

Every time a piece of art drops on my dash, or I see my fic being recommended to other people, my brain does a lil short circuit and I have to go get up and walk around for a bit. I'm not sure words can express how much it means to me that people have enjoyed my writing enough to recommend it to other people, or sit down and create something of their own based off of it. It's humbling, and I'm truly grateful for every kind word or "sketch I should have maybe spent a little longer on" hahaha

Stats!

Look, I'm an engineer. I can't resist the thrall of Microsoft Excel. So here's A Chart.

I value Bookmarks the highest of all the stats that AO3 spits out. Views are pointless (skewed higher in the context of multi-chap fics). Kudos are an indicator of how many people read and liked enough to leave a kudos, but bookmarks are my indicator of how many people liked it enough to keep it around to read again, or recommend to others.

The bookmark-to-kudos ratio is (in my unscientific opinion) a measure of how many people loved the work vs how many people just liked it.

From the chart above, we can propose the following conclusions:

9L is still, far and away, the most popular, and most well-loved thing I've ever written. I'm fine with that.

The Nutstang fic was a certified cult classic, with a bookmark-to-kudos ratio of almost 0.3, second to only 9L.

NN is at a respectable ratio of 0.24 (middle of the pack), but in terms of number of kudos, is not that far ahead the mer-pirate fic. NN was not tagged as erasermic, so I do think this checks out in terms of sheer exposure.

Still Cooking:

FFXII AU

I started this one in March during the conga line of personal life nonsense. I somehow lured in Robbirdthe8th and @o0fyuu0o and @obsessed-dragon and got a solid month of drafting done before I was like "maybe I should work on NN again" and then it sat dormant until like. October.

It's up to almost 30k across 3 partially written chapters already, and I outlined 9 chapters. It is almost certainly overambitious, and I will almost certainly run into the same motivation issue I had with NN because it's a rooftop 4 fic and not just erasermic, and it has a demographic of approximately four people as an AU of a game that came out in uh........2006.

I thought I'd get at least some of it out in '23 but I'm taking it easy and just writing when inspiration strikes at the moment.

Fortuneteller AU

I started this one maybe a week-ish ago, in my quest for a pitch for the erasermic zine (surprise! they haven't made official announcements yet, but I'll be in it. this is an easter egg for those of you who made it this far). It's going to end up far too long for the 3k word limit for that, so I'm just co-opting it for another one-shot. Taisho era urban fantasy dabbling in some Violet Evergarden/FMA-esque post-war themes. Mic with pince nez. Aizawa in hakama. Gratuitous amateur tarot. It has gripped me by the throat.

More from the Nine Lives Extended Universe (canon-willing)

I've got 3 more spin-offs to 9L simmering, just waiting for canon to figure out its business. These are:

When The Battle's Lost and Won

A final battle post-mortem in 4 parts (if 3baka all make it out alive that is). Every few chapters of canon that come out, something gets added or tossed. Extremely fluid at this point, but there are some good quality blurbs and bullet points in there.

Kintsugi

The erasermic epilogue to 9L, from Mic's perspective. An exploration of their relationship beyond the final battle, with an overarching theme that I've borrowed from a Dorktown documentary on former Toronto Blue Jays pitcher Dave Stieb: Not at all, and then all at once.

This one's just pure body worship, punctuated by an extremely casual marriage proposal. A lot of people still comment on 9L like "THIS CAN'T BE IT, WHERE'S THE REST OF IT?", so I hope this will satisfy those looking for some closure from a relatively open ending.

The Way of the Househero

With the impending graduation of the hell class, and a body that doesn't quite move the way it used to, Aizawa has a bit of an existential crisis and semi-retires so he can be a full-time parent to Eri while figuring out what's next for him. Mostly slice of life. No real plot to this one yet, mostly just vignettes. Aizawa finally gets cats of his own, makes mom friends, and becomes more of a knife slut (only its in the kitchen now instead of on the streets).

IRL

Painting

Every room in my home is painted some sort of bland pastel, and this year we managed to purge pastels from four rooms: my home office, our living room / dining room, and our bedroom. I am enormously pleased with how each of these have turned out.

Gardening

We moved to this house in January '22, and last year was mostly seeing what came up in the garden. This year we cleared out a lot of the decorative shrubs in our backyard (turns out you can hock shrubs on facebook marketplace), and planted a veggie garden. The extent of my gardening experience prior to this year was mowing the lawn as a teenager, so this year was a continuous learning experience, and likely will be for many more years to come.

We had some big wins (potatoes, tomatoes, carrots, cherries, squash, dear god the squash), and some losses (apples that were infested with tent caterpillars, arugula that bolted, and lettuce that got eaten by bunnies to name a few).

In addition to veggies, we also did a lot of general cleanup around the rest of the yard, including clearing out some invasive species and thinning out some partially dead shrubs. We mostly let the yard do its own thing last year, and the previous owner of our home died about 6 months before we moved in, so it was probably neglected for a while. I cut out a blackberry cane that was as long as our driveway. I bought a wood chipper and a compost aerator and am learning the art and science of turning yard trash into yard treasure. (I have not peed on my compost pile yet, as recommended by /r/composting. Maybe some day.)

I also adopted a clipping from my sister-in-law's monstera, which has done quite well (except for the parts my cat has taken a mild interest in nibbling on from time to time)

Travel

Probably too much travel this year ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

3 Weddings (4 if you count the one in December '22 that's included in the Conga Line of Nonsense). Got covid at 2 of them. Invited to a fifth next year. Wishing everyone of marriageable age I know IRL a very elope

Trips for work to Winnipeg and Calgary (to which I have never been before, but are both underwhelming). Also got to fly on a floatplane for the first time, which is noisy, but the views are unbeatable

I turned 30 this year, and after the Conga Line of Nonsense, I said fuck it, we're going back to Japan for my birthday. 2 weeks, 8 cities. L: Shimanami Kaido cycle (still somehow 30 degrees in September x full sun x forgot sunscreen x 80km = pain) (my husband has proofread this and insists that this is not an L but agree to disagree) W: Hokkaido (beautiful scenery, incredible food, not 30 degrees in September lmao)

Anyways

If you made it this far, thanks for reading, and thanks for your love in '23. I hope to provide you with more of the same nonsense in '24. Let me know if you want a spinoff cats + gardening + DIY blog, since that's just my life now. Happy new year 🍾

#Machiwrites #long boi under the cut

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thedrarrylibrarian · 2 years

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I've been so excited about this month's Happy Hour guest because I enjoy her writing so very much. I first fell in love with @drarrily-we-row-along's writing during her 100 Drarry Drabbles in 100 Days. Short fics are sometimes hard to set a scene for, or hard to give good plot for, but I remember racing through each of her drabbles, feeling like I never wanted them to end because each bite sized piece of writing was so good! Most recently, I've been enjoying her contributions for @hdcandyheartsfest. It feels like every day in February I get to read something new and wonderful from @drarrily-we-row-along and I love it!

One of the things that I've learned about writers is that they are often readers, so it's always one of my greatest joys to get to peek into what one of my favorite fic writers is reading herself. Here's our wonderful February Happy Hour guest rec from @drarrily-we-row-along!

Hello friends! I was super excited, and very honored, to be asked to be the guest for Happy Hour in February. I love this blog and have read *so many* incredible fics that have been recced here! I’ve actually been reading quite a bit lately (so many beautiful fics that have brought me a great deal of joy) so it was really tricky to pick just one!

I ended up deciding on Fire Meet Gasoline by @lettersbyelise.

Fire Meet Gasoline by @lettersbyelise (62,600 words, rated E)

When Draco’s anger management issues land him in St Mungo’s, he thinks his Quidditch career is over. But Harry, A&E Healer and notorious workaholic, is faced with a similar predicament. To save their jobs, the two of them decide to fake a relationship. All they have to do is convince their friends and employers… and not fall in love in the process. Simple, right?

This fic.

It hit me right in the solar plexus. I read this fic back in the middle of January (read: devoured this fic- I couldn’t put it down once I started) and it’s been lingering in the corners of my subconscious ever since. This fic is really beautiful and honest; both Harry and Draco are incredibly flawed, wounded people and reading about their healing is immensely satisfying.

Also, it’s a fake-relationship fic which is always it for me. Give me all of the casual intimacy of a couple and all of the angst of a slow burn wrapped in one delicious fic. I’m obsessed with the rules they make in the beginning and the rules they break along the way. I’m a sucker for the ‘idiots to lovers’ tag, for the way that both of them feel they aren’t worthy of the other, that they could never be loved in return. *chef’s kiss*

(An important side note: Their relationships with their friends are beautiful and heartwarming in so many ways. Their respective found-families and the unconditional love they receive from them hit me in the feels repeatedly. I fell in love with Snaffles, and the version of Scorpius in this fic owns my entire heart.)

But most importantly for me, Harry and Draco in this fic are written absolutely perfectly in their imperfections.

Fics that deal with trauma in a realistic (and sometimes painful way) are my favorite and I love the look into both of their psyches in this story. Draco is so very much himself in this fic; he’s strong and he’s brilliant, he’s sarcastic and devastating; he’s all of the things that make reading about Draco such a delight. The way that he articulates himself, the way that he holds his boundaries, the way that he keeps everyone at an arm’s length, the way he feels about himself when he’s at his most honest; I’m undone. And Harry! Harry’s flaws and woundedness are absolutely, stunningly believable. I would read all day about a workaholic Harry Potter, who can never measure up to impossibly high standards that he’s set for himself because of childhood trauma. He’s a gorgeously flawed character, who seems to be trying very hard not to actually find himself and not to deal with all of his own hurt. Frankly, there were times that I had to take several deep breaths and blink back tears when I was reading about Harry because some of it hit just a little too close to home and the words were so poignant and touching.

This fic is beautiful from start to finish, I hope that you click the link and give yourself a treat. By the end you might just find that this beautiful fic has not only healed something within our lovely boys, but within your own heart as well.

Thank you again to @drarrily-we-row-along for this brilliant rec and thoughtful review! Thanks for joining us in the library!

❤️ As always, if you find a fic you enjoy, please remember to leave the author a kudos or a comment! ❤️

Lots of Love and Happy Friday!

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yuksterv2 · 1 year

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Confessions of a Friend

TLDR; this is set in an AU where Chrissy and Mike get to interact and become friends with one another. For the experience, Chrissy decides to work at Starcoart Mall where she meets the Scoops Troops and becomes involved in the Russian Plot line, hence her knowing of the Upside Down. Takes place just before Stranger Things 4, so around January/February of 1986.

Tw: depression/suicide.

In the moment, something caught in the back of Chrissy's throat- call it an involuntary reaction to the situation unfolding in front of her. It was almost unreal, like the dramatic climax to a novel that had the reader on the edge of their seat. It was comparable to that of losing a loved one, only that the dreaded hadn't come to pass; she could still do something. But she couldn't. In the moment, her feet were seemingly glued to the roof, confining her to the spot.

There Mike was, barely hanging on to the ledge whilst Chrissy stood a mere few feet away, unable to do anything. Some friend she was. No, this isn't about me, it's about Mike! Chrissy fought to make sense of the situation, but it felt like fighting a losing battle- like attempting to piece together a jigsaw puzzle using all the same pieces. She'd have to be strong for him.

For Mike.

Impossibly, Chrissy managed to will herself forward an inch and utter the boy's name, "Mike." The boy in question shakily turned his head, his cloudy eyes shrinking upon meeting Chrissy's green ones. They must have stood there staring at each other for minutes. Overhead, the raging storm had settled, painting an almost angelic scene. Finally, Chrissy took another step closer.

He loosened his grip.

"W-wait! Think about what you're doing!" Chrissy yelled suddenly, forcing tears she hadn't even realised she was holding back to spill out. Mike's throat seemed to tighten. "Why? Chrissy, why'd you have to come here and make things more difficult?" he asked. "I have thought about this, in fact, it took a few months of convincing to get myself here, so please go," Mike pleaded, his cloudy eyes now playing host to a miniature storm of their own. "I-I can't, Mike. If you ever did anything drastic, I would never forgive myself, so please, step down and we can talk," Chrissy said defiantly, taking another step closer. Mike didn't answer, nor did he do anything in protest, so she took another; she continued to cautiously waddle her way towards Mike one inch at a time. "You're hurting, a-and I've known for a while, but I never said anything; I'm a bad friend..." The boy shook his head, his wet raven locks swaying delicately. "Chrissy, don't-" But Chrissy beat him to it, "no, I-I have! Friends don't ignore each other's feelings just because they're confused with their own. I want to make amends. I want things to be better! Mike..."

Before Mike knew it, Chrissy was a mere few inches away, only the metal railing that separated the roof from a massive drop in their way. This close, he could clearly see the distraught look in Chrissy's eyes; his heart tightened up. She forced her eyes to meet his. "Mike, if you went away, I'd never get the chance to set things right." "But it's not worth it," Mike said plainly. "What?" Mike scoffed, tears seeping from his eyes and leaking into his mouth. "Surely, I'm not worth that much to you, I might be your friend, but it's not worth the hassle. I'm not worth the hassle! If I disappeared right now, it wouldn't matter!" "Mike, I think the world of you!" Chrissy bellowed, clasping the frigid metal railing firmly. "If you jump, you might as well be tainting the soil I stand on!" she shouted, tears now running freely and quickly down her cheeks.

Both seemed too stunned to speak: Mike at the words coming out of Chrissy's mouth, and the same for Chrissy. She had poured so many hours into keeping her feelings hidden just for them to come out in one moment of desperation. She had been weak. Once again, Chrissy had allowed her mouth to get ahead of her mind, and she would have to deal with the retributions of her actions. But not now- later.

Chrissy searched Mike's eyes pleadingly, but there was nothing; no recognition, hurt, nor careful consideration. It was then that Chrissy realized something. Her entire life, Chrissy had been scared to show anything so long as it reflected poorly on her perfect image; anything less than perfect was left in the dirt. To this day, she still grappled with this issue.

So did Mike.

Although it was in a different form, it was the same beast. By now, the rain had become heavy again, and so Chrissy took drastic measure. Without thinking, Chrissy jumped the railing, being careful not to slip on the water-coated ledge. The raven-haired boy turned to her with wide eyes, his face riddled with concern.

"It's okay," Chrissy said instantly, stalling her best friend's undoubted protests. "I won't do anything drastic so long as you don't." Mike stiffly nodded, not taking his brown eyes off Chrissy. "What is this?" he asked tiredly. "My way of showing you how much you mean to me, Mike," Chrissy answered, flinching as she momentarily glanced down at the steep drop; they were suspended at least five stories upwards, undoubtedly enough to kill them both. "I didn't lie. If you leave, then my life isn't worth living...so I won't, and you know that isn't a bluff." "But..." Mike stammered, a flash of recognition in his eyes. "Why are you doing this to me?" Carefully, Chrissy's hand snaked towards Mike's, causing the boy to momentarily recoil. "My entire life, I've been so scared of showing people what I'm really feeling," she admitted breathlessly, sealing her eyes shut. "But I'm weak and say things I'm not supposed to, so I have to punish myself sometimes," she continued, turning gingerly to Mike, open-eyed. "Do you get like that?"

Mike looked fearful to say anything, but Chrissy's understanding eyes burrowing into his eased the welling feeling. "Am I really that obvious?" "No, I've known you for years and I've only just realized it now after gaining some sense and stepping outside of my own bubble," Chrissy admitted. "I don't want you to feel pressured, but I want you to step out, too, okay?"

Timidly, Mike nodded, intertwining his fingers with Chrissy's after much scrutiny. Like film on a reel, her mind began to play several snapshots of time, all allocated to her and Mike. How hadn't I noticed the signs sooner? Now, as she played back long-forgotten memories, every pained smile of Mike's she called into question; which were genuine, and which were nothing but a façade? In every memory, no matter fraught or positive, Mike's smile never faltered.

He was being strong for us, but it was all a lie; I thought that this had only started recently, but the monsters weren't coming from the other world, they were coming from inside of Mike's head! How had she not noticed sooner?

"It hurts, Chrissy; it hurts so much," Mike said painfully, breaking into sobs every now and then. "I want to tell people so badly, but I-I feel like I can't, otherwise..." Chrissy stared at him dolefully. "Otherwise, what?" she asked, and Mike shrugged. "Otherwise, they won't think that I'm a man," Mike said, not taking his eyes from the cobble pathway below. "My dad, he doesn't really care about us - never has - but I still do. I feel like if I proved myself to him as a man, then he'll finally give me an ounce of affection, and if that means locking my feelings away, then so be it!" he continued. "But I've been weak- I've been weak and let you in! So, what am I worth if I can't even do that!" "Mike! Mike!" Chrissy exclaimed, which finally forced Mike's eyes to meet hers. "You've got nothing to prove to a man that has treated you that way your entire life; look at how he's gotten you- look what he's caused; he'll never change for you!" she said vigilantly. "I-I know this feeling...my mother sees me as nothing but a prize, and I've spent my entire life trying to please her insatiable expectations, but it was never enough for her; it was always about 'the next hurdle' and then she would expect me to breach it. I was like a mouse on a treadmill: running and running to get my reward, but it stayed at a distance- it always did, and so I turned away from her- I..." Chrissy ranted, but struggled to say the last part. "I found you, and you and everyone else have shown me more love than she did my whole life!"

Mike glanced downwards. "Oh, Chris, I'm so sorry," he said remorsefully. "I didn't-" he tried to say, but Chrissy cut him off. "You don't have to say anything. Truth is, I'm still getting over the actual hurdle that was my mother, but I've been making progress thanks to you." The boy blinked, his eyelashes doused in what could either be rain or his own tears. "Me?" "Yeah, you," Chrissy confirmed, nodding. "I realized that all I've ever wanted was love, but I was looking for it in the wrong place; it was right in front of me the entire time," she said, smiling fondly. "It was you, Mike, I..."

There was a pregnant pause, the only sound filling the gap being the constant barrage of rain beating against the tiled roof. It was as though the rain had synchronised with their own beating hearts. Chrissy opened her mouth, and the words she had kept locked up for so long finally flowed out.

"I love you."

His mouth was agape, too shocked to piece together words. "You don't have to say anything back, Mike," Chrissy assured him, clutching his hand tighter. "All you need to know is that you are loved, and I love the part of you that you really are," she continued. "I know my words won't mend what you're feeling, but I want to help you overcome it. So, could you do me a favour?" Chrissy asked, staring deep into Mike's eyes.

He nodded.

"Step away from the railing and come with me," Chrissy said, forcing a grin. "No promises it'll be any good, but I'll try and recreate that hot chocolate that your mom makes," she said jokingly, forcing a laugh out of Mike. "Okay, I'll hold you to that," Mike said, his faint smile down casting a ray of warmness on Chrissy's face, letting her know that, for once, it was genuine.

Carefully, they both stepped away from the ledge, climbing over the railings with much caution as to not accidentally slip. That would be a waste after all the effort I've just gone to. They thankfully made it over unscathed, unless you count psychological damage; Chrissy knew she'd dream about this horrid night for the rest of her life. Wordlessly, they both ascended the steps that led away from the roof. None of them minded the silence.

They'd spoken enough words to each other that night.

#stranger things #mike wheeler #chrissy cunningham #tw depressing stuff

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woozi · 2 years

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henlo yza beloved <33

oh my god <//3 love the way you put it honestly, the way you're so smart <3 the answer was right there and i managed to miss it 😭 i was lichrally like " ok so river dried up no thoughts head empty " and now it's as if the last missing puzzle piece finally fit itself in my mind jdjsksks that really explains whys and hows of haku ending up there, btw the importance of names and home in this movie was so heartwarming 🥺

also that's so sad to think about though, haku not having any place outside of the spirit world also means he might never get to meet chihiro 😭😭😭 ( unless he found a little something like home in chihiro ( yk home being a person instead of some house ) then idk he can become a water body anywhere she lives, if or when he decides on meeting her. like you know there is someone out there calling out his name or missing him which gives acknowledgement to his existence thus making a tiny place available somewhere where he is wanted even if as just a visiting guest) ok but honestly i'm also kind of okay with them never meeting hddjdj like even though it's sad there's still some kind of comfort in knowing the fact that some people only come into your life to help you grow in good way!/ intentionally or unintentionally helping e/o through tough times and then moving on )

also honestly same 😭😭😭🥺 i feel like we've been talking since ages, thank YOU for even taking out time to listen and reply to my nonsense fr, i'm so glad i sent that ask to tell you, your " im skydiving with vernon " tag was funny 😭🥺 i really enjoy talking to you

SPEAKING OF VERN how excited are you for his mixtape? would love to hear your thoughts!, i feel like he's gonna come out with some emo rock/grunge banger tbh, basing on the artwork and his love for avril lavigne songs hdjdjdkd whatever it is i know i'm gonna eat it up bc i live for his verses in hhu songs

hope you're doing well yza 🤍, and you too after 21st take some time out for yourself and recharge, you deserve it <333 love you 🥺 thank you for hanging out with me as always, bestie <333

(honestly had nothing extra to add 😭 dec is kicking me fr. days are just going by i have had no idea about which day it is this whole month 💀 also i haven't forgotten about the movie i'm gonna dm you details after i send this, feel free to check after 21st! )

MA CHERIEEEEEEEEEEEEE 😻😻😻😻

NAURRRRRRRRRRR i am not smart i'm just one for obsessing over details fjkfjdkfjdk AND I KNOW </3 it was such a good concept esp considering how our identities are so tied up with the names given to us by birth and the names with which we choose to present ourselves with!! AND UR MIND HELLO???????????? also agreed <33 i'm fine w the bittersweet ending (i… love them actually 😭)

ALSO PLS NOOOOOOOO i should be the one thanking u fr </3 lich rally where would i be without ur lil ask </3

AND URE SO REAL FOR THIS PLS FKJDFJFDJKFDJK i also find myself gravitating towards his verses we r besties fr 😋 and u r right once again omg it gave early 2000s <3 WHAT DO U FEEL ABT IT!!! i personally like the band ver more, it feels a lot more raw!! think the way mainstream kr companies (honestly cant be said for the indie ones theyre going IN on it there) produce rock music is so… tame for lack of better word, but the band ver ate fr tbh <33 IM KINDA SAD SOME OF THE SCENES OF HIM IN THE BLACK TANK TOP DIDNT SHOW UP ON THE MV THOUGH </3333333 HE LOOKED SO GOOD

i've been getting to rest a bit until i received an e-mail from one of my professors today 😭 now it's a sign for me to get back to work, i still have more finals and more deadlines for january, but after that i'd be FINALLY getting a real break 😋

AND NO PLS FDKJDFJ I FEEL U!! i hope ure getting to rest as well and that you've had a great time this holiday season <33 love u thank u for always being here 🥰 MWAH

#cherie 🪂#s-cxups #y.ask #long post

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crimsonblackrose · 2 years

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me: Oh boo, I’m spending the holidays alone. my aunt: Your uncle is one step away from telling your cousin he can’t come with us on our trip. me: NO. This time of year is rough on people and I know it’s going to be rough as hell on me. It’s going to be the first year without my dad. But I have plans to deal with that, little traditions I want to do by myself in a house alone. I want to have the whole place to myself so I can grieve and mourn and also get stuff done. I’ve been looking forward to this, planning it, little traditions to give myself, to relaxing and eating when I want and not having to talk to anyone unless I call them or the day after the holidays where I go downtown and meet up with friends. But if my cousin stays I’m going to spend the whole time worrying about his mental health. Specifically because of his history and his self destructive behavior and unhealthy coping mechanisms (i.e. downing an entire bottle of hard alcohol straight). He spent the entire weekend inviting strangers over to the house and keeping his friends here and once one went home he invited others. I don’t feel safe being home alone with that. I don’t want to clean up after him. I don’t want to worry about him. I don’t want to feel guilty doing my own thing and cooking my own meals which I paid for all my own meals and budgeted just for my own. I don’t want to have to take my holiday plans and try and figure out how to include him in them so he’s not spending them alone too. Because if left alone he might just spiral. I want to relax and be off. I want to clean and for it to stay clean. I don’t want to babysit a grown man, I don’t want to clean up after him. I know these are things I’m under no obligation to do, but it’s going to piss me off so much if he’s here and it’s going to stress me out. It’s one thing for my aunt and uncle to make their holiday plans and invite me because we were going to visit my oldest aunt and uncle and my cousin who I haven’t seen in 8+ years, then tell me that they changed their mind because my uncle’s mother was too old to travel so they’re just visiting her. And so I said I wasn’t going with them because I don’t know her and her retirement home is 2 people max allowed in because of the pandemic and they take one car so I’d be literally just sitting in a motel doing nothing the whole holiday. So I told my aunt maybe late January we’d go visit my aunt and uncle together and that’d be nice and she agreed. And then for them to change their mind and decide we’re visiting the 90+ year old and then we’re going to visit your aunt and uncle and cousin on the way back and not invite me or tell me about that one until it was already set in stone and booked and it overlapped with my new years plans to visit my sisters. Like I made my adjustments, got used to the idea. I have plans to get so much shit done because I’m not going to be cleaning up after other people, because I’m not going to stop to chat to other people or worry about other people. There’s going to be no dog to have to interact with or avoid. Or worry about what he’ll get into with my back turned because my cousin doesn’t pay attention and neither does my uncle. There’s going to be no one to step around. I want to not be a person. But I also get why my uncle’s pissed. It’s one of the many factors of why I do not want my cousin to stay here with me. Because he’s in a mood. Because he’s inviting strangers over to the house and letting them spend the night even though my cousin doesn’t know them and we’ve never met them. Because he invited his friends we do know over for the entire weekend and they never left until my uncle told them to go home, and then my cousin called up different friends and my uncle had to kick them out in the middle of the late night/early morning.

And for the last three trips my cousin was supposed to go with my aunt and uncle on he’s decided not to go last minute and I’ve been stuck with him. And I cleaned up after him because there was literally no space left in the kitchen not covered with dirty dishes and half eaten food. But at least he’d go visit his mom, but she’s not in town this holiday season. He spent Thanksgiving with her. And he wasn’t having friends over every five seconds or one night stands. But I still worried and panicked when I hadn’t seen or heard from him for a day. He needs to go. He needs to spend time with family during this holiday. He needs to see his over 90 year old grandma. He needs to get out and do things that don’t include drinking an entire bottle of gin by himself in the morning. I don’t want to be last minute in charge of his holiday festivities during a period of time that historical is bad for him. I do not need that on my shoulders when I’m already having a hard time.

I’m not going to be fun to be around during the week. I’m going to be working. I’m going to be trying my damn hardest to get my life organized for the new year. I’m going to cook for myself when I want to and I’m going to not be presentable. I want to just throw my hair up in a ponytail and not wear a bra if I don’t want to. I want to order a pizza and eat the entire thing over a few days by myself without worrying it’ll disappear some point in the middle of the night. I want to organize the fridges and for it to stay that way. I want to throw stuff in the dishwasher that hasn’t been cleaned in a while and not worry that someone’s going to walk in to use the microwave and the plate’s in the dishwasher or the grates on the stove are missing. I want to be able to lock the doors and not worry I’ve locked him out because I don’t know if he’s around or coming back and is prone to locking himself out. I want to blast my music and sing along and not worry about bothering anyone or sounding like shit. I want to watch bad holiday films without being judged. I want to play my video games on the TV by myself. I want to be able to break down into tears and to sob and for no one to hear. I want to work at the dining room table without anyone walking behind me during a meeting. I want to put my spiked eggnog in the fridge and drink it slowly and use it to make cookies and not worry that my cousins drinking it all because he’s too lazy to go out and buy his own booze. Or for him to hover around the house moping because he’s out of money and can’t go buy more booze or meet his friends at the bar and doesn’t know what to do with himself.

I don’t want to feel guilty while making dinner for myself that I paid for and find him hovering because he’s hungry and curious about what I’m making but I didn’t buy enough for more than myself and he’s not going to cook and share and I’m just going to get pissed if I cook and share and he eats it all without ever attempting the opposite. Because that’s the norm. Because even when everyone is here he almost never cooks for anyone else, and mopes if even if he went out for dinner with his mom or friends and you don’t save him any of whatever you made. He doesn’t help. He doesn’t clean, he doesn’t even put his dishes in the dishwasher or his trash in the trash can. He

I want to make treat boxes and not have to put sticky notes on everything that they’re not for him to eat so I can give them to friends and family because he already ate over half the truffles and buckeyes without asking if he could eat them or what they were for. I want to be alone. I want to do what I want. I want to take some time to just be. I don’t want obligations. I don’t want to be perceived. I want to do stuff I don’t normally do. I want to to only worry about myself. I want to be in charge of just me.

#mumblings #cross your fingers my cousin goes with my aunt and uncle for the holidays #because I'm going to be so pissed if he doesn't

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lunasalix · 2 years

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I really want to quit my job. This happens a few times per year for me, usually when I have an event coming up that I’m not particularly excited about (basically any event that’s not science or GSA related).

This time, it’s a plethora of different issues coming together that have left me completely drained.

I did that autism thing where communication is scary and difficult, so I decide to wait until I feel ready, but that doesn’t happen quickly enough and then it’s so late that the rejection-sensitive dysphoria kicks in and I freeze up thinking people will be mad at me for being so late in responding, so I wait until the very last possible second, then it really is too late. Self-fulfilling prophecy. So part of this is 100% my fault. I need to be open with my bosses about this issue and see if we can find a solution.

Then, with finals week quickly approaching, I have fallen so far behind on so many other things because I’ve been so busy with meetings and trainings during all of my planning periods that my grading, attendance calls, failure calls, actually writing the exams, and other paperwork crap has gone to the wayside. I have been refusing to work outside of contract hours except the week leading up to an event (of which I’ve planned and hosted 4 this semester with the 5th this Friday). I’m tired and stressed and this mountain of work looming over me is not helping.

In addition, the event that I had carefully planned for GSA in early January - a visit from 3 local drag artists - was canceled because of the stupid, bigoted politics in my state. If we still had the old principal, I’d go right over his head and sneak to make the event happen anyway. However, the new principal is in a delicate position as interim and as a black man in a position of power, plus he’s a great leader, so I don’t want to jeopardize him in any way. I’m just mad that drag queens existing in public is being equated to telling Latinx student to go back to their countries. Like, one is artistic expression and the other is just being an asshole.

I’m also mad that our old principal is apparently spying on the new one by communicating with people who still work in the building and he keeps calling the new principal trying to convince the latter to do things the way the former would have. Our school is improving on every metric and you really have the gall to think that your crusty ass has better ideas than the new guy? Fuck all the way off.

But I’m also conflicted about some of the new principal’s decisions. He wants to fix the fact that we have multiple fights per week in the building, so his solution is to arrest every student who fights. I feel like that’s damaging to throw black kids from the projects straight through the school-to-prison pipeline for something that is clearly an issue of emotional regulation and self-preservation, but who am I to tell a black man what is best for black children?

I also feel like I’ve taken on way too much. I’m team lead - which involves meeting with admin to create agendas for the meetings on my side of the building, planning events for quarterly student celebrations on my side of the building, and developing initiatives for improvement, all of which are used as a model for the rest of the building because my side is the highest performing. I’m also a sponsor for GSA, which used to meet once per week during study hall, but now that study hall is gone, they meet during lunch. We got new help this year from an outside organization that I thought would take some of the load off, but it’s created a ton of infighting with the students and the “help” constantly wants to have events while doing very little of the planning or funding for those events, and they need constant support to control the kids because none of the kids like them. Then I’m the sole faculty sponsor for Student Government, which means I have to plan, fund, and host every major event in the building - homecoming, cominghome, all pep rallies, prom, spirit weeks, seasonal celebrations, etc. Every time I have sought outside help in this role, the people I who offer to help end up not doing anything, but they don’t tell me until the last minute so I end up having to clean up their messes days before the event. This has happened 3 times with 3 different people. When I ask admin for support, they always agree that I shouldn’t do it on my own, but offer not help in actually getting someone else to take on some of these tasks. I don’t even like any of the events Student Government runs. I didn’t attend them when I was in high school, and I still wouldn’t if I wasn’t the one having to put it all together. I got tricked into the position by a senior staff member telling little baby teacher me that it only involved signing off on things and that the students do all the work. In addition, I’m the sole union representative in the building, so every time the union has a campaign, I have to organize my coworkers single-handedly, which can only be done outside of normal work hours. This is yet another position I was volun-told for. Then I somehow ended up on all these district-wide committees that involve multiple meetings throughout the year.

I just want to teach my classes. I have 4 different courses which are meant to be highly hands-on, with lots of community involvement, field trips, labs, guest speakers, job shadows, and more. Until this year, my career pathway was the best run in the school. Now that an actually good teacher moved into one of the other pathways, I’m seeing what mine could be if I didn’t have so much else on my plate and could actually focus on my classes. My kids are complaining that they don’t get as many opportunities as the other pathway now. It makes me so sad and I feel like I’m failing them.

In addition, my sophomores this year are giving me a run for my money. When I first started, 5 years ago, I had the most difficult group of sophomores I have ever taught. 60% had disabilities, 50% had major behavioral issues, and they had not had an English teacher in 3 years because they kept making their English teachers quit - so reading comprehension was dismal. BUT! They learned. They became my favorite group that I have ever taught by the 3rd year in my pathway. This year’s group have been on the scientific method for 2.5 months. Yesterday’s opening question was, “Which step of the scientific method do you think is most important, and why?” which I told them was purely opinion-based. After 5 long minutes of silence, the most academically talented student in the class raised her hand slowly and asked, “Ms. X, what is the scientific method?” It was all I could do not to cry. In 5 years of teaching this, I have never had a group take more than 2 weeks to catch on. The assistant principal witnessed the entire thing and said that there is nothing more I can do to help them understand it - the learning is on them and they are choosing not to partake. That broke me. I have never had trouble motivating students. I have never had a group just refuse the most fun labs of the year until this one.

I feel like a failure. I know it’s not true, but it feels that way. In addition, I feel like everyone in the building kind of hates me right now. I lost the teacher of the year vote, and I have yet to be awarded teacher of the month as well (which is decided by the previous teacher). I’ve had several teacher express disappointment that I haven’t been doing more in some of my roles this year. I feel disconnected, unwanted, and unsupported.

I feel like the only way out of all of the extra roles I’ve accumulated is to quit, but I worked so hard to build my program that it feels wasteful to just leave it all behind. I had to build my curriculum for 4 courses from scratch. The entire district uses the curriculum I built. I also don’t know what else I would do. Finding a decent paying job in science is impossible without some type of medical degree. I just want to be outside sharing nature with people of all backgrounds and ages. Why is that so hard?

#teaching #public schools #not to mention all the district and state initiatives that add to the paperwork pile and generate data thats never meaningfully applied

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ploffline · 2 years

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Sonic 3 style sonic mugen

it's OpenGL only, and works with 1280x720 Res the best. Old Class Lifebar - MUGEN 1.0/ 1.1 - Download Page Osu!! Karate Bu Lifebar - MUGEN 1.0/ 1.1 - Download Page / Edit: Hi I'm back, I'm balancing between Sonic Boll, and MUGEN, so here's an update Q: What the hell is this? A: a Used to be April Fools Screenpack, created by Devon. Naruto: Clash of Ninja Revolution 2 Lifebar - MUGEN 1.0/ 1.1. athena xi athena asamiya (and 6 more) Tagged with: athena xi athena asamiya kof king of fighters sexy cute 18+ compatible rape Athena Asamiya 18+ by ahuron and edit by choiyer 1,042 downloads. I have added a White summoning seal option, patch is located in the lifebar section.įnaf 7 unblocked mugen edits (0 reviews) 0 comments Submitted January 15, 2020. Thanks to my boy Yang once again for hooking me up with sprites. My lifebars have been update to now include the effects from MBAA. Type Moon Unlimited lifebars graphics update. With the new interface, the program follows the same pattern. The new version Ultimate offers advanced editing options, and offers much more performance to your users. Using it, you can create and edit characters, stages, fonts, and everything you want. The Fighter Factory Ultimate is a full featured M.U.G.E.N. Fielding funeral home chariton ia Fighter Factory Ultimate. IMPORTANT: This character was designed for MUGEN 1.0! If you use him in 1.1, his vore moves may not function properly in team battles! (Though he should be fine in single battles regardless.) (Unlike my previous submissions, I can't seem to locate a download link for the original. ****Mugen Multiverse Public Release!!!****.įull Games, Full Games Mugen Characters, Full Games Mugen Stages, Full Games Game Download M.U.G.E.N.: Scyther Vore Edit v1.0 + DOWNLOAD. SUPPORT ME ON PATREON TO CONTINUE CONVERTING-UPDATING MUGEN CHARACTERS FOR PUBLIC RELEASES AND EARLY ACCESS ON MUGEN CONTENT!!! Subject: Re: MUGEN 2018 Character Edits & Fixes!!! September 15th 2021, 5:39 am.Edits de Orochi & Mizuchi Para Mugen 2015 Parte 1 + links de descargalink of download - Mediafire - Disfrútenlos :DCHARS EN FACEBOOK.DarkLuigi's Character AI Patches/Edits.Includes also new Portraits,New RRDA Sprite and New Hyper combo Sound An Edit i made of An very Oldest Daniel with an file named daniel2,This edit Has sprite Changes which were taken from Daniel_CvS and Dark Paparazzi's Daniel_CvS Edit.If you have forgotten your username or password, you can request to have your username emailed to you and to reset your password. also i made a silly edit to the nones scary giygas. Hes disliked because of his poor quality and ego. here ya go! anybody who doesn't know about josh geary or in short. >w> i made edits, i was bored again.:3 meant for anyone who plays mugen and wants better collision boxes for josh geary so hes easier to kill.Super Luigi Edit (Nerfing and fixing SM853's edit of SuperLuigi) Edits and Add-ons: Tylor's MUGEN Domain - MUGEN - A site on my MUGEN stuff.This version takes influence from Sonic Battle, but seems to be custom, with the creator drawing parallels between this game and Tatsunoko vs Capcom. That being said, this version manages to counterbalance that with unmatched comboability, with most moves smoothly comboing into each other. He also has the ability to fly, like in the source games, though he can't fly for too long.īeing a fox cub, Tails isn't quite known for being powerful. His damage output is low, but his Hypers hit very hard. Like all of MUGENHunter's characters, Tails uses custom sprites and The King of Fighters-styled gameplay. His second version has been edited by Shiruzato. The most known versions are MUGENHunter's versions. In M.U.G.E.N, Tails has been made by various creators, with varying sprites and gameplay depending on the creator. He was originally very timid, but after meeting Sonic, he has become brave and independent. He is also an aerial pilot and he often uses Sonic's plane, called the Tornado. Tails has a genius-level intellect and is a natural prodigy when it comes to mechanics. He started following Sonic on his adventures and became his best friend and sidekick ever since. However, one day, he met Sonic the Hedgehog and was inspired by him running like the wind. He has also starred in his own games including Tails' Adventure, Tails' Skypatrol and Tails and the Music Maker.ĭuring his youth, Tails was frequently bullied because of his two tails. Miles Prower (nicknamed Tails by Sonic) is an 8 year-old twin-tailed fox that first appeared in Sonic the Hedgehog 2 and reappeared in almost every Sonic game since. There are versions of this character available that don't have their own branch articles!

#Sonic 3 style sonic mugen

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hardskz · 4 years

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to think that we wanted to make a toxic friendship work ahahahaha

#long tags ahead dont open #for those whove been following me since june-ish might still remember my breakdown with this one guy friend #we got close during our senior year and we were good friends our relationship was built on mutual insulting (some insults vv unrealistic)#we shared that humor y'know but his was a tad more extreme ig #if i recall correctly he sent me some meme with the ch*** slur and me being asian and also used to be called that when i was younger #uh it didnt sit well so i told him yea could he not im offended could I get an apology #he goes on saying he wont apologize bc he didnt know i had such trauma and why should he apologize for something he didnt know #and i should sToP TryiNg to be politically correct bc it's just a meme #may i add this went down during finals week and i had a mental breakdown and even cried on the phone w my other friend #idk why i was even so invested but yea it was weird and then one night i texted him we kinda made up #oh and he also liked to 'flirt' w me but i guess he only meant it as a joke #until he said he found me cute no cap and would be alright if we stayed friends but wouldn't mind being exclusive #in the end we only stayed friends bc i was going abroad fma few weeks later and came back on christmas #and considering we only got to talking six months before is a lil concerning #we didnt talk bc the time difference made things hard to schedule and then he had his exams sometimes in october i think #in january once i was back i wanted to meet up w him but he rejected both times bc he didnt like meeting up in person and preferred texting #well everyone knows im a bad fucking texter and yes i ghost people sometimes for weeks bc i simply forget to reply them #and when i read the text im very likely busy so theres that #i was staying over at a friend's when he started a massive guilt trip saying how only he makes the effort to stay in contact once AGAIN but #but somehow we magically made up and i told him lmao we are such toxic friends but he didnt think so lmao #anyhow so uh perhaps i ghosted him for a month straight (so i am at fault too)#and today was the confrontation and i told him things from my view #it escalated into *surprise* another fight #and i think now we're done for good #now that we fknally agreed to go no contact and go our seperate ways i feel... relieved #i gotta admit my stay abroad did change me and im more aware abt my flawed personality too #and ig back then half a year ago i just didnt want to let go of him yet #not only bc we talked comfortably and perhaps i indulged too much in our platonic flirting #but he was the 2nd guy i considered an actual friend #did i make the right choice by cutting him off? i like to believe so i think it's best for my emotional stabilty too

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sugars-fluffy-escapes · 3 years

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Timid Hearts and Fresh Starts

Loki x Shy!Alien!Reader

SFW; angst to fluff, platonic, budding friendship

Words: 5976

Summary: The God of Mischief is not at all happy about becoming a resident of the Avengers Tower, even less so about the awkward interactions that come alone with living amongst the group of people he once tried to kill. When he drives away the one member of the team aside from his brother who isn't troubled at all by his presence or by his past, he sets to make things right, and in the process, hopefully to make his first proper friend since moving into the tower.

Warnings: Disgruntled Loki, feelings of guilt from both parties, self doubt + negative self talk, fluffy tickles

DISCLAIMER: This fic was originally written in January and I fine-tuned it a bit but I'm unsure about it. I hope the themes I'm trying to convey come across correctly. I imagine that if Loki were to ever live in the Avengers Tower with the others, there'd be a lot of self isolating and hesitancy to trust someone who wants to show him kindness and isn't fearful of being around him. Reader's guilt sort of reflects my own guilt process (a.k.a. hell LMAO) Overall, I just hope this tells the story of two struggling individuals who find common ground and start to open up to each other.

Also, reader's blushing is described as a luminescent pink and purple, because they're not human in this story. I do not, and will not, use color to describe blushing in other fics. Ages might not be accurate in this, and please forgive me if some characters seem ooc T-T Writing for multiple characters is a task. All the characters are still alive in this fic because I need some happiness rn 😭 Think of this as a self indulgent What If? (I'll probably rewrite this one day)

To say Loki was pissed was an understatement. Sure, he knew this was a chance at redemption for him, to start anew and do right by his family, but he could feel the mistrusting eyes follow him when he walked into the room. Of course, Thor always greeted him with a smile and an overly eager pat on the back, but it was hard to focus on the positive attention when the rest was negative. He knew it would take time to earn their trust, but the looks and aversion to interacting with him didn't help him to feel like he wasn't a monster. There was, however, one person on the team that never gave Loki any indication that they didn't trust him.

Y/N was a newer recruit, from a different planet by the name of Thauria, though they still had been on the team longer than Loki had. He didn't know much about them, aside from the fact that they were very quiet, and very shy. They were easily embarrassed, and would often resort to hiding their face in their hands if something flustered them. Loki had barely heard them say a word. The Thaurian knew about Loki's past. They knew about his attack on New York, but they were also the only other person aside from Thor who understood to the fullest extent that he'd been mind controlled during the attack.

Although Y/N knew people would have expected them to be afraid of Loki, they weren't. Why would they be? When Thor first introduced Loki as the newest member of the team, Y/N gave a warm smile, and greeted him with their home planet's non-contact way to say hello. He watched curiously and confusedly before being surprised by their small voice. It shouldn't have been as shocking as it was.

"W-Welcome to the team, Prince Loki of Asgard. It's nice to meet you." They were so formal, so polite. The God would be lying if he said his heart hadn't fluttered.

"Thank you... I suppose..."

He hadn't intended to sound cold, but if Y/N had been hurt by his words, they didn't show any signs of it.

"I hope you're able to get comfortable quickly, Prince Loki. Make yourself at home." Y/N left after that, but not before saying farewell to Thor, who couldn't help but pat their head affectionately, which made them giggle, their cheeks, ears, and nose glowing a luminescent pink and purple, a reaction that Loki found to be very cute, though he wouldn't dare say so.

Tony stared from the couch in complete disbelief, jaw dropped from what he'd witnessed. Everyone else was shocked that Y/N was so unafraid of Loki. Of course, Thor hadn't been shocked at all. He knew Y/N was a friendly, bubbly soul, and most of all, they were a very empathetic being. Even though they were without a doubt the most introverted person on the team, whenever Loki walked into the room, they would give the tiniest simper, and wave briefly in Thaurian, before resuming what they were doing. Before long, the timid smiles and waves were accompanied by other acts of kindness.

They noticed that he'd begrudgingly take whatever old mug was clean to use for his tea or coffee, and one day while out in the city with Wanda and Vision, bought an emerald green ceramic mug, and tied a little label on the handle with twine that read "For Prince Loki." Suffice to say, Loki was taken aback at the sight of the mug sitting cozily on the counter one morning. There was no indication as to who it was from, but his suspicions were confirmed when he saw Wanda gently nudging Y/N's shoulder with a bright smile out of the corner of his eye as he sipped his drink from the mug.

The next act was in the form of a book, which Y/N had actually worked up the courage to give him. It was a book of Thaurian poems, which they'd decided to give to Loki after Thor mentioned how much Loki loved poetry. They initially asked the God if he could be the one to give it to Loki, but Thor felt it would be more meaningful coming from them.

"I... I thought this book might interest you and wanted you to have a copy... It's a collection of poems from Thauria. I hope you find them to be a good read," Y/N had said quietly. "Take care, Prince Loki."

Loki spent days just staring at the book, frozen by confusion, and frustration. Why the Hel was Y/N being so kind to him? No one else in the tower aside from Thor trusted him at that point, so why did they? Why did this near stranger smile at him with such respect and adoration in their eyes? It angered him. He had been wary enough about joining the team already, given how they felt about him, and continued to feel despite knowing what Thanos had done to him.

The Asgardian Prince felt that no matter what steps he took, he could never redeem himself. It was irritating him that Y/N wouldn't just stay distant and mistrusting like the others. They never overstepped his boundaries, and gave him space, but they never went out of their way to avoid him or ignore him. He didn't understand. He didn't feel he deserved to be treated so respectfully, not after everything he'd done. There was a growing, slow boiling rage growing in his heart over it. One day, he couldn't take it anymore.

It had just been him and Y/N in the common room. He'd walked in to see them sitting there, and had tried to make his way back out, but Y/N noticed, and assured him he could stay to read if he wanted to. Loki awkwardly accepted the invitation, and sat down on the couch. As Y/N sat cozy in their chair several feet away, silently reading with a small smile on their lips, completely at peace, Loki grew annoyed and finally asked the burning question he'd been dying to ask since the first day the two had met.

"Why do you do this?"

They looked up at him with a bewildered expression, eyes widened a little more than usual, brows knitted ever so slightly. "What do you mean, Prince Loki?"

"What is it with you and being so friendly to me? Why are you so relaxed despite my presence? Why not flee the room when I enter or avoid me entirely?"

Those questions confused Y/N even further. They tried to answer, but Loki had already continued. "Are you that naive?"

"W-What...? Naive about what, Prince Loki? About you?" Y/N inquired, feeling themself grow uneasy from the question he'd asked. "Of course not... I've been well informed about what happened a few years ago."

"Yet you're not wise enough to stay away?"

"Have I made you uncomfortable...?" Y/N asked, their expression changing from confusion to worry and guilt. Loki's hostility was worrying them. "I apologize sincerely. My only intention was to make you feel more welcome-"

"Stop. Just stop that already," Loki's voice had grown louder and the Thaurian winced. "I don't need your pity. You have no bloody idea who you're talking to."

"P-Prince Loki... I don't pity you, I respect you..." Y/N could feel their sinuses burning from the urge to cry. Although they tried with every bone in their body to hide their reaction, they knew they weren't succeeding.

"It would do you some much needed good to stay the Hel away from me like everyone else on this Godforsaken team," Loki hissed. "Admit it already, Y/N. I see that look on your face. Admit it! I'll always be the monster people tell me I am!"

"I-I don't believe that... Prince Loki." The Thaurian's words were firm despite the tremble in their already small voice. "I know how daunting the journey of self forgiveness feels. I know it's hard to be optimistic about redeeming yourself, but-"

"Just stop." Y/N jumped. Though Loki hadn't been very loud, it was still startling. Another louder noise had their arms retracting toward their body, staring down with wide and glassy eyes at where their book had landed on the hardwood with a loud thump. Loki wasn't done, his ire still fueling his words.

"Stop trying to understand me, Y/N." He spat, pointing at them with indignation before he drew back and placed his hand on his forehead, his voice softening. "Please... You don't know a bloody thing about me. I assure you, it's better this way..."

The tears were screaming to fall, but the Thaurian refused to do so. Not yet. The guilt Y/N felt was overwhelming, and with one deep breath, they uttered one final response.

"You're right, Prince Loki. I promise, I'll leave you be...

Y/N bit their cheek, quietly leaving the room, book still lying open on the floor where it had fallen. As soon as they were in the hallway, they allowed their wings to materialize, before shrinking down. They flew into the library as fast as they could, making their way to a little space at the back.

Given that they often had a habit of shrinking down in size when they were distressed, scared, or needed time alone, Wanda, with Tony's blessing, used her magic to create miniature spaces around the compound that Y/N could use whenever they wished. Y/N then used their own Thaurian magic to decorate each one.

The one in the library was without a doubt their favorite, and they quickly opened the little nook, closing the door, drawing the outer window curtains shut, and curling up on the tiny bed inside, crying into the quilt, too wrapped up in their melancholy to think about much else. In the midst of their weeping, their body grew far too tired to remain awake, and minutes later, they'd fallen asleep, restless as their guilt plagued their dreams.

Y/N wasn't sure exactly how much time had passed, but they knew from the nook's window that the sun was setting. They didn't want to leave, and considered just asking F.R.I.D.A.Y to have someone bring dinner when it was ready. Tony had made sure the AI had been installed in the nooks and seeing Y/N use the feature was hilariously endearing. They remember his reaction to seeing them use the feature for the first time.

"Oh my God. Yup. If I get any cavities, I'm blaming you. This is genuinely sweet and it's pissing me off."

The genius' reaction had Y/N giggling.

"Y/N!" Thor's booming voice echoing in the library made Y/N jump with a cry. Their still-fragile state had left them very easily startled. "Are you in here, little fairy? Please come out."

Y/N stayed quiet, even as the God grew closer to the nook. He knelt down to be at eye level with the doors, delicately and gently using the little knocker before softly calling his teammate's name again. Hesitantly, Y/N opened the door and peeked out.

"Oh thank the Nine Realms! Hello there, little Y/N. It's just me," Thor assured them. "May we talk?"

"Okay..." Y/N relented, moving out of the door and sitting down on the little balcony. The Asgardian was grateful for the power of The Allspeak, since in their tiny form, Y/N could only speak in their native tongue.

"Little fairy, did something happen with Loki earlier?" Thor asked quietly.

"I made him upset..." Y/N answered, lip already quivering as they tried not to cry anymore than they already had. "It's my fault, Prince Thor... Please forgive me..."

"Your fault? What makes you say that?"

Y/N couldn't stop their tears any longer, and they began to cry again. "I was bothering him. I'm certain I made him uncomfortable. I really am naive and foolish... I'm so sorry, Prince Thor... I made Prince Loki hate me..."

"Little fairy, that couldn't be further from the truth!" Thor smiled sadly and held out his finger, which Y/N slowly placed their hand on, a gesture that never failed to melt Thor's heart. "He's been worried sick about you. He'd been searching for you five hours already when I arrived back at the compound from my mission."

"F-Five hours...? I m-made him worry..." The Thaurian was overwhelmed with a new wave of tears, and they began to apologize repeatedly, burying their face in their hands and wailing. "I'm so horrible! First I upset him and then I stress him out! I'm such a terrible person!"

"No! No you most certainly are not," Thor argued softly. "You're a very beloved soul with such a gentle heart."

"I'm not, Prince Thor... I'm oversensitive and weak..." Y/N was spiraling into self doubt and judgement. It happened quite a bit when things went awry. Their mind was also their biggest enemy and the overthinking was a huge hurdle to have to overcome as a member of the team.

"What makes you think you're either of those things?"

"It's the truth, Prince Thor... Prince Loki has every right to be mad at me. I'm going to give him space for the time being..."

"I can't stand this any longer, brother. I'm coming over."

"Loki, wait!"

Y/N jumped at the sound of Loki's voice and began to panic. They tried to rush back into their nook, but Thor placed his hand in front of it. "Prince Thor, please move!"

"You don't have to hide, little Y/N! Please don't hide."

"H-He's gonna be s-so angry with me! Please! I-I can't face him right now!" Y/N insisted tearfully, freezing their attempts to move Thor's hand when they realized Loki was standing a few feet away.

Thor unblocked the door to the nook, but Y/N remained frozen still, like a deer in the headlights. Loki slowly stepped closer, and that's when Y/N had quickly retreated into the corner of the balcony, breath hitching at the impact of their back on the railing. With an audible whimper, they tucked their legs into their chest. The tall Asgardian was a bit taken aback by just how little they were, and noticed their skin had become much more pink than before, which he guessed was the true hue of it.

He felt a pain in his chest at the sight of Y/N being so scared. When he spoke, his voice was hushed, and gentle. Although Y/N could still understand English in their shrunken form, Loki opted for using The Allspeak to speak in Thaurian, hoping it would make Y/N feel a little less fearful.

"Hello, little one," he greeted, kneeling down so he could be at eye level with the tiny Avenger. "May we talk for a moment?"

Y/N's eyes widened at hearing Loki speak in their native tongue, and the term of endearment. They looked up at Thor, who gave them a reassuring smile and patted Loki on the back. "I'll leave you two to converse."

Thor left the space and made his way to the front of the library, looking back once before leaving. When Loki looked back over at Y/N, they grew tense and averted their eyes, still crying.

"I never took the time to thank you for the gifts. Thank you, for the mug and the book of poems."

"Y-You're welcome, Prince Loki..."

The few seconds of absolute silence that followed made the two rather uncomfortable.

"Y/N, I wanted to apologize for what I said to you earlier..."

"I should be the one apologizing to you, Prince Loki..."

"You have nothing to apologize for, darling," Loki insisted sadly, before taking a deep breath. "Would you allow me to explain myself? I have no intentions of trying to justify the way I acted. I only want to assure you that it wasn't your fault..."

Y/N silently nodded, still sitting in the corner as they patiently waited for Loki to speak again.

"When you welcomed me to the tower so warmly... I was... confused. I know you were not on Earth during my attack on New York, but I figured that after the team had explained what I had done, that you'd be just as mistrusting of me as they are," the God said quietly. "For a very long time, I have had no hopes of ever redeeming myself. I have been unable to forgive myself for anything that I've done... It hurts to say but it's the truth. You were right, Y/N."

"I never should have assumed. It was wrong of me to say..." The Thaurian countered. "I had no business saying what I said, Prince Loki. We may be teammates, but I don't know you, and I acted like I do..."

"But that's just it, little one. You weren't assuming," Loki looked down at his hands. "You were merely seeing what I hoped no one else could see as vividly as I. That is why I got upset."

There was a brief pause as Loki fought to keep himself composed. He shook his head with a hollow laugh, unable to stop his eyes from watering with pure sorrow.

"I couldn't believe that a soul as sweet as you, was so willing to welcome me with open arms and show me such kindness. I don't know what you see me as, Y/N, but I cannot see myself as anything other than a monster, and that has kept me from accepting your cordiality..."

Those words made Y/N incredibly sad, and seeing the tears in Loki's eyes hurt them immensely. "I've never seen you as a monster, Prince Loki. A hurting soul is far from a monster..."

Despite their anxious thoughts telling them not to, despite the fear that they might upset him further, they slowly moved to sit right on the edge of the balcony, and silently beckoned for Loki to move his hand up to them. He eyed them curiously while he obliged, but when he realized Y/N had placed their tiny hand on his finger to comfort him, the tears finally fell.

"Y/N, from the moment I met you, you've been eons kinder than I ever expected anyone on this team to be toward me... Truthfully, I was warming up to you, much faster than I anticipated, and I was afraid that letting myself get close to you would result in you being hurt." Another empty and pained laugh left Loki's lips as he wiped his eyes with his free hand. "Yet I only managed to hurt you and frighten you in the end anyway. I can't tell you just how contrite I am for pushing you away, and for making you doubt yourself."

Y/N watched another fall from his eye, and began to flutter their wings, slowly at first, before they blurred from the speed at which they moved and began to lift the Thaurian from the balcony. They flew upward, then carefully got closer to Loki, using their sleeve to wipe his cheek. It became drenched instantly, but with a glow of their magic, it dried once again. The sweet gesture only served to move Loki to more tears, and the Thaurian panicked.

"Oh no! I'm so sorry, Prince Loki!"

Much to their surprise, the Prince began to smile, and that smile became warm sounding laughter. "IhIt's alright. It's alright. These are happy tears this time."

He gently held up his hand, encouraging Y/N to land on it, and they did so, holding onto one of Loki's fingers for support before carefully sitting in the palm of his hand. The Thaurian timidly stared down at their lap when Loki carefully lifted them closer to his eye level.

"A-Are you... are you sure you're alright, Prince Loki?"

"I'm right as rain." Loki's smile was brighter, and his expression was soft, a look that Y/N was not used to seeing on the God's face. "However, please, call me Loki. I admire your etiquette and formality, but it is not necessary now. We're acquainted a bit more properly, aren't we?"

The slow timid nod from Y/N was followed by a tiny smile. "I suppose we are, Loki."

"Y/N, I'm so sorry for everything I that I said to you earlier. You're not naive, and you're not foolish," Loki said quietly.

"I-I don't blame you for being upset, Loki... My actions were smothering and unwarranted-"

"No. No they were not. You respectfully kept your distance while showing me kindness." The God's voice was soft despite his sudden interruption. He looked into their eyes, and took a small breath. "Y/N, may we start over? Would you be willing to allow me the chance to earn your forgiveness?"

"We don't have to start over. You've made amends. You already have my forgiveness, Loki." Y/N felt fresh tears stream down their cheeks, that deep feeling of guilt still having a hold on their heart like a vice grip on someone's wrist. "Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?"

"Whatever for?" Loki questioned.

"I m-made you worry... I'm sorry I hid, and I'm so sorry I caused so much distress when you couldn't find me," Y/N stated.

"Of course I forgive you, little one." The God very carefully brought his other hand up, delicately wiping what tears he could from their face.

"Thank you, Loki. I-I don't know why I cried so much," Y/N sniffed, embarrassment written all over their face. "I-I'm nearly one thousand and forty five years old. I should have a handle on myself by now."

"Everyone cries, Y/N. You're not oversensitive, nor are you weak. It doesn't matter how old you become. It's okay to cry." The Asgardian averted his eyes briefly before looking at them again. "Especially when someone's been unkind..."

Y/N nodded to acknowledge his words, more tears rolling down their cheeks when they blinked in an attempt to clear their vision.

"Care to know something?" Loki asked with a gentle smile, leaning closer when Y/N nodded. "I'm not much older than you. One thousand fifty-nine years, and here I am, just barely starting to get a handle on myself. I'm certain you've noticed my trial and error."

Y/N blinked, before an unexpected giggle bubbled in their throat. Loki's grin was instantaneous, and he chuckled softly, which only made Y/N giggle harder. He hadn't heard their laugh since the first day they met, and Norns, he wanted to hear it every day.

"Are you aware of just how saccharine your giggles are, little shortcake?"

And there it was. He saw the luminescent pink and purple rise to their nose, cheeks, and the tips of their ears. "Lohoki..."

"What a little darling you are~" he mused, words filled with playfulness and mischief, the side of himself he'd not shown Y/N before at all. "That glowing blush of yours is only serving to prove my point."

"S-Stop ihihit..." Despite being flustered by Loki's words, and their voice getting higher in pitch, their smile was growing. Loki gently placed a finger under their chin, with the intent of lifting them to look at him.

It initially startled him when they flinched and moved their head, but the giggle he heard right after caused him to smirk with realization. "Oh? Is someone ticklish~?"

The word in English flustered them enough already, but hearing it in Thaurian made them squeak. Despite their reaction, they shyly shook their head, pressing their lips together in a poor attempt to keep from laughing any longer.

"No~? Are you sure~?" Loki lightly brushed a finger on their neck, chuckling when their shoulders scrunched up, arms and hands folding closer to their body. "You're not ticklish~?"

Y/N began giggling harder, biting their lip and squeaking again when Loki teasingly wiggled his fingers closer. The sight had butterflies fluttering around in their stomach, a sheer feeling of giddiness washing over them. A loud squeal was followed by high pitched laughter when Loki gently tickled their sides, causing them to fall back on his hand.

"Lohohohokihihiiiiii!"

"You mean to tell me this isn't tickling you~?"

"Ihihihit ihihihihiiiis! Pfffhahahahaaa!" They lightly kicked their legs, partially hiding their face behind their hands. "Nahahahahahat thehehehehehere! EHEEEP! NAHAHAT THEHEHEEERRRRE!"

Loki continued gently brushing his finger across their belly, and noticed that their hands had fallen by the sides of their head, leaving their abdomen unshielded from the tickling. Since they were tiny in that form, they felt the sensations all over their torso, no matter where the tickles were targeted. They'd made no attempts to actually avoid his playful attack, and the God quickly connected the dots.

"Oh now that is absolutely precious~" he hummed. "Does someone like being tickled~?"

Y/N was too giddy to try and lie about it, and bashfully nodded, too embarrassed to look at the God and resorting to closing their eyes. Loki chuckled and poked at their sides again.

"Now now, no need to hide or feel embarrassed, little one. Where else are you ticklish, hm? Care to give me some hints?"

The Thaurian shook their head defiantly, grinning with glee and abdomen still shaking with hiccupy giggles. Loki teasingly hovered his finger above other spots, before using his finger and thumb to delicately attack their hips. The screech Y/N emitted had Loki laughing heartily. Their giggles were full of little gasps and squeaks.

Suddenly, their little body glowed and they were back to their normal size, wings de-materializing and pink hue fading from their skin. Loki had been quick to shift his hands, with one supporting their shoulders while the other was underneath their knees. They were still giggling, and Loki couldn't help laughing again over the sudden startling change.

"IhIhI'm sohoho sohohohorry!"

"IhIt's okahay! Ahare you alrihight?" He asked, his heart fluttering when Y/N nodded with a giggly simper and rested their head on his shoulder. "I'm ever so glad."

"IhIhI've gohot buhuhuhutteheherflies thouhouhough..." The Thaurian admitted through their laughter. "IhIn thehe fihiguratihihive sehehense..."

That particular phrase had absolutely bewildered Y/N when they first came to Earth. When Wanda once mentioned that she had butterflies in her stomach, Y/N was genuinely worried.

"H-How did they get in there!? Are they okay? Are you okay? Sh-Should we call Dr. Banner?"

Wanda almost cried from how sweet their concern was and assured Y/N that she was just fine. That's when the Thaurian learned it was just a figure of speech. Their added statement to clarify they meant figuratively had Loki internally fawning over them.

"Ah yes, the stomach butterflies," Loki affirmed, gently setting Y/N down on the floor beside him, still turned sideways with their legs over his as his arm stayed around them for support. He looked ahead with a smile, before turning and looking down at the precious alien sitting next to him. "You know what you should really watch out for, little shortcake?"

"W-What?" Y/N's voice had become a hushed whisper, eyes widening with curiosity and slight uneasiness. When Loki lifted his hand and slowly wiggled his fingers in the air with a smirk, their uneasiness was replaced by bubbly excitement.

"The tickling spiders~"

"H-Hehehehey! W-Wahahait! NaHAAAAA!" Y/N kicked their legs reflexively when Loki lightly attacked their knees, hiccuping and gasping in between squeaks of laughter. "LOHOHOKIHIHIII!"

"Uh oh~ Unlike stomach butterflies, these spiders can move anywhere they wish~" the God sang. "I wonder~"

He lightly tickled the spot where the back of their thigh met the skin behind their knee, and was a bit startled when they snorted, louder cackles leaving their lips before dissolving into the high pitched giggles once more. They hid their face in his Asgardian shirt, legs still kicking weakly as the laughter temporarily took their strength. Loki stopped before they grew tired, and grinned.

"Still with me, little one?"

"IhIhI've gohohot thehehehe gihiggles nohow," they hummed. Their laughter was so contagious that Loki began chuckling all over again.

After a few minutes, when the sounds of mirth had subsided, Loki stood with Y/N in his arms, and then gently set the Avenger down. "Shall we go get dinner?"

Y/N nodded, timidly fiddling with their sleeves, working up the courage to ask Loki a question.

"W-Will you eat with us? With me...? It's game night, so we'll eat together and then play some board games... Earth games are fun."

As much as Loki wasn't looking forward to seeing the other members of the team aside from his brother, Y/N's optimistic smile brought his mind a little bit of peace, and he accepted. Y/N let out an excited squee and bounced on their heels, before timidly asking if they could give the God a hug. Norns... Y/N was a darling. Loki felt bad about being so cold and distant for as long as he had been. He opened his arms, beckoning them to move in, and let out a huff of air in surprise at how suddenly they wrapped their arms around his waist. His chest rumbled with a laugh, and he happily returned the embrace.

"Loki... Thank you."

"Thank you, Y/N. I look forward to getting to know you better."

The team was shocked to see Y/N leading Loki to the dining room table with a smile on their face, but Thor was beaming with pride. Though it was a bit awkward at first, Loki found himself having fun, and enjoyed being mischievous during a game of CLUE with Wanda, Vision, Y/N, Sam, and Bucky.

"So why'd you get to be Miss Scarlet, Sam?" Bucky challenged.

"Because, I'm goddamn flawless," Sam answered with a snap. "Your turn, Colonel Grumpy."

"Mustard."

"I said what I said, grumpy."

Loki took the victory as Professor Plum, and Y/N cheered him on, clapping with the brightest smile. He was a little embarrassed, but he couldn't hide his joy. The others were stunned by how cheerful he seemed, but they weren't complaining. Not that most of, if any of them would admit it, but it was a pleasant change from his usual brooding and isolation. Y/N took the victory in a game of Candyland, which had been their all time favorite board game since they first played it with Peter and Steve.

"How fitting for the real life embodiment of Lollipop royalty to win a game of Candyland~" Loki mused.

The pink and purple glow crept up on Y/N's cheeks, ears, and nose in an instant.

"Y/N, I think that's the brightest I have ever seen you glow," Steve commented with a smile.

The Thaurian's attempt to cover their blush was thwarted when it grew brighter and illuminated through their fingers.

"Aww, Y/N!" Peter grinned at the precious sight. "That's so cool!"

"When the geek gets geeked," Sam joked, causing Bucky to break into laughter.

The longer the night went on, the more fun Loki had. Thor was overcome with happiness over it. His younger brother had even managed to share some lighthearted banter with Tony. As the games slowly came to an end, with most of the team having retired to bed, Y/N and Loki remained, along with Thor, who announced he was off to sleep.

"I'm so glad you two worked everything out," he declared. "Thank you for joining us tonight, brother."

"Y/N helped me come out my shell a little more today," Loki stated, smiling at the Thaurian with pure adoration. "Thank you."

Y/N giggled, their glowing pink and purple blush illuminating the dimly lit room. Thor patted Loki's shoulder, before gently patting Y/N's head, making them giggle even more.

"Goodnight, you two," he stated.

"Goodnight, brother."

"Goodnight, Thor."

It was just the two of them after that. There was a brief moment of silence, before Loki turned to look at them.

"Are you feeling tired?" He questioned, lips pressing together in understanding when

Y/N shook their head.

"I... I fell asleep in the nook after a few minutes... When I woke up, the sun was setting."

Loki knew they'd probably cried themself to sleep after they'd fled the room and his stomach churned with guilt. He offered his hand, and Y/N slowly placed theirs in his.

"I can't tell you enough how much I regret my harshness toward you," he muttered.

"Loki, I forgave you," Y/N reminded him with a sad smile. "We're okay."

Those words echoed in Loki's mind long after Y/N had said them.

"Would you like to stay out here a little while longer? Perhaps, I could read to you?"

Y/N's eyes lit up with excitement, and they nodded, maybe a bit too eagerly, but their bubbly reaction was adorable. Loki realized that they looked as if they were about to ask something, but were hesitant. "What's on your mind?"

"May we sit by each other, like... like how we did in the library? Please, if it's alright with you?"

Loki wasn't used to the idea of people wanting to be so close to him. He'd come to terms with being seen as a monster, someone to stay far away from, but he realized that if someone as kind-hearted and loving as Y/N, chose to be around him, and wanted to spend time with him, that perhaps he wasn't the monster he saw when he looked in the mirror. Of course, it would take time for him to trust and believe that for himself. Until then, he'd trust Y/N's kindness. It helped him reflect on his reconciliation with Thor as well. Thor saw his potential, his true heart, and since they'd made amends, he had been the only one Loki trusted for a long time.

"Of course we may."

He used his magic to change into more comfortable clothing, as he figured they'd be out there for more than just a little while. When he caught Y/N's look of awe out of the corner of his eye, he playfully raised an eyebrow. Y/N giggled before their own glow of magic ran down their body, their clothes transforming to pajamas. Loki chuckled, before motioning for Y/N to move closer. They moved their legs over his and leaned on him, casting their magic to summon a quilt for them to share, while Loki retrieved his book of choice with a glow of green.

"What book did you choose, Loki?"

"A Galaxy of Sonnets," Loki read in Thaurian. Y/N was beaming as they realized it was the book of Thaurian poems they'd gifted him a couple weeks before. "Thank you for this book, Y/N. I apologize that I hadn't yet read it."

"It's okay, Loki. I hope you enjoy it."

"I most definitely will, darling. Now then, shall we begin?"

The following morning, the team was utterly flabbergasted to see Loki lying on the couch, poetry book still in hand, with Y/N curled up to his side, legs still over his and both of them beneath the same quilt. The two were sleeping soundly, completely at peace in each others' presence. It would still be months, if not years, before Loki truly felt at home in the Avengers Tower. Until that day came, he'd do his very best to find joy and comfort amongst his older brother and new best friend. In time, Loki would find peace in his fresh start.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The self indulgence is real. I'm so unsure of my old fics agsjsjdkdjd I shall go hide 👉🏾👈🏾 Loki is a favorite character of mine (and another dream ler- what can I say?). I plan to write more Loki fics with pronouns aside from he/him in the future as well. I hope you enjoyed this (if my self doubt were harvestable it could be a new energy source 💀)

#ler!loki #lee!reader #shy!reader #ticklish!reader #loki x reader #sfw tickle fic #ler!loki x reader

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weighty-ghosts · 3 years

Text

Hawaiian Tropic (wolfstar)

Hawaiian Tropic (sequel to Coppertone), by weightyghosts

“‘Well. That certainly wasn’t how Sirius imagined he would meet Remus for the first time. Crap.’

Sirius is out of his element, Remus is simply adorable, Moony isn't looking for a new friend, and the integrities of certain Canadian desserts are called into question.”

Rating: teen

Word count: 8000

Pairing: Remus x Sirius (minor James x Lily)

Published: January 24, 2021

Warnings: mild language

https://archiveofourown.org/works/36628606

“This is ridiculous.”

Sirius shot his friend a look of disdain. “What did I say about complaining?”

“That you welcome it because you recognize how ridiculous this is?”

“James,” he warned, “You owe me.”

“It was funny!” James repeated for the hundredth time, now with a patronizing eye roll. Dick. “You have to admit it was funny. You’d be laughing if it was anyone else.”

“Maybe,” Sirius begrudgingly conceded– because obviously that was true. “But now look where it got me: standing behind this random bush at a park on the other side of the city, searching for a man I met over the phone and therefore have no idea what he even looks like.”

“Hey, I’ll freely admit that it’s my fault you have a date with a sexy foreign guy who loves dogs. I’m so sorry for this fortuitous turn of events.”

“It’s not a date. And thank you for apologizing.”

“Of course it is. And you’re welcome.”

Sirius let out a noise of annoyance, loud enough to make Padfoot twist his head to the side. The dog was sitting at Sirius’ feet, not so patiently waiting to be let off his leash. His bum was practically bouncing off the ground.

Sirius craned his neck to look around at who was at the park. He had only been to Trinity Bellwoods once, on Canada Day two years ago. It had been overly crowded (an amazing feat considering how many acres the park stretched) with a weird mix of young hipsters and old homeless people. All drunk.

He’d never been to the off-leash dog area, which they technically weren’t in yet; that was in a small valley that the rest of the park surrounded. Sirius wasn’t sure if it was a natural or man-made crater, but it was a good spot to let dogs run around freely.

He now stood on his tiptoes to look over the row of hedges they were behind, which sat at the top of a short trail that led down to the valley. There were about twenty people and their dogs there. Any of them could have been the man he’d spoken to on the phone. “Can you just go look for him, please?”

“Sure,” James agreed easily, “Oh– is that him?”

Sirius whipped around, his stomach lurching with excitement– and then it quickly fizzled out.

The person James was pointing at was an elderly man holding on to a walker, almost bent in half from his large, uncomfortable-looking hunchback, walking a few yards away with a tiny black poodle.

Sirius smacked James’ arm.

“Ow,” James complained, as Padfoot startled to attention. “Sirius! How the hell am I supposed to ‘go look for him’ when you don’t even know what he looks like?”

Padfoot was sniffing James thoroughly, investigating if that had been an act of violence or playfulness. He appeared to settle on the latter, then circled around to Sirius’ side and nudged him with his nose, whining to be done with this boring task of standing around when he could be romping in the mud.

Sirius hushed him with a comforting pat on the head, then focused back on James. “I know his name is Remus.”

“And?” James replied slowly, “You want me to go up to every man here and ask if their name is Remus? That’s what a crazy person would do.”

“Then it’s the perfect task for you, isn’t it, Jamie?”

“Alright, let’s play this out,” James started with the patient tone of a kindergarten teacher, “Let’s say I find him, yes? I go up to all the men and finally one of them says, ‘Uh, yes, I’m Remus?’ Then what? I go, ‘Cool, be right back, my dude,’ then come and get you? He’s obviously going to know you sent your friend looking for him because you were too chicken to do it yourself. Is that what you want, Sirius?”

Sirius had crossed his arms during that tirade. He hated when James pointed out the flaws in his plans, especially because it was usually the other way around. “No, James, I don’t want you to do that,” Sirius huffed, then wrinkled his nose, “Please never say ‘my dude’ again. I swear, you shouldn’t even be allowed to talk to the general public.”

He waited for James to finish his eye roll before continuing. “But you put my dog on Kijiji –as well as my ass– so you’re going to go find this man for me. Just listen around for a Welsh accent.”

“How am I supposed to know what a Welsh accent sounds like?”

“Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously! I don’t know what a Welsh accent sounds like, do you?”

“Ugh,” Sirius lifted his nose in the air, “You’re so uncultured.”

James snorted. “You couldn’t even find Wales on a map if it was labelled with big neon letters.”

“You know geography was always my worst subject!” Sirius snapped. “We’re getting off track. The man had a very sexy voice! He sounded like all the James Bond’s mixed together. That’s how you’ll know it’s him.”

“Even Roger Moore?”

“Who?”

“Never mind. I’ve got it. You stay here with Pads and I’ll go scope out the scene.”

Sirius nodded, bouncing on his feet, and looked on as James took a couple of steps over to where the hedges ended and the winding path was visible. He then stopped dead in his tracks as some people walked by him.

Sirius frowned and walked over, Padfoot in tow. “What is it?”

“That– that–” he stuttered, his face slack like he’d just seen a ghost. Or Scarlett Johanssen. “That girl– she– walking by– she’s–” James paused, then sighed. “Pretty.”

Sirius made a vomiting motion, which James didn’t notice, then grabbed his sleeve and shook it. “Jesus Christ, pull yourself togeth-”

He cut himself off as something caught his attention.

Sirius could only see glimpses through the thick greenery, but he could make out the forms of two people walking with a large dog, talking loudly enough for Sirius to hear their voices clearly. One of them sounded familiar.

“–appreciate you coming with me, but honestly, Lily, are you trying to get me arrested?”

“I don’t see the problem!” said a feminine voice with a Canadian accent.

Sirius started to wave James over so they could stealthily follow the two on this side of the hedge, but apparently James had already had the same idea; he brushed past Sirius in some sort of trace as he squinted to see the ‘pretty.’

“You don’t see the problem?” a sexy as hell Welsh voice returned sarcastically, “I’ll admit I’m not familiar with all the local bylaws, but I’d wager a guess that it’s illegal to go up to strangers and ask them to pull down their trousers so you can take a peek at their arses!”

The woman scoffed. “Apparently I’ve failed to show you the more exotic parts of Toronto.”

There was an exasperated sigh.

Sirius was tapping on James’ arm, trying to get him to clue in, but the man was a goner. Padfoot had sat down, annoyed at all the back and forth they were doing in one place, and the leash was sliding to the very end in Sirius’ hand.

“Besides,” he heard the woman say, “How else are you supposed to recognize him?”

“I know what his dog looks like.”

She hummed as though this wasn’t a convincing argument. “There could be a bunch of black dogs at the park though, and there’s only one ass like that.”

“I really regret sending you that screenshot,” the man groaned.

“Too late now, Remus,” she said cheerfully, then actually cackled evilly, “Marlene already saved it as your contact photo in her phone.”

“Lily! You sent that to Marlene?”

“It was on Kijiji! That ass is public domain!”

“Oh my f-”

Sirius didn’t quite hear the rest, as his arm had just been yanked backwards by Padfoot standing his ground, and he stumbled back a few steps towards the dog.

“Hey…” James slowed his steps, turning back to Sirius with a frown. He sounded as if he’d just woken from a deep sleep, “I think these people are talking about you?”

“You think?” Sirius grumbled as he straightened up. All the excitement and anticipation at realizing Remus was right there had been tampered by the embarrassment of finding out a picture of his bare bum was making the rounds in Remus’ friend group. He really ought to have murdered James by now. “Well, now you know what a Welsh accent sounds like.”

“That was him? For sure?” James’ eyebrows had raised high on his forehead. “Damn, that is a sexy accent.”

Sirius nodded in agreement. “Are they still there?”

James went back over and peeked through the bush. “No, I don’t see them. They must’ve walked down into the dog park.”

“Well,” Sirius shrugged his shoulders, “Can’t get any worse, right? Might as well go and meet him.”

“I think I should come with you,” James put out in a serious tone, “This man is a complete stranger. He could be dangerous. He could have come here to kidnap you to do scientific experiments on your body for the greater good or some crap.”

Sirius gave him A Look. “No need for the theatrics, James. You can come with me to meet your future wife.”

“Wonderful,” James grinned.

They kept walking around the top of the dog park until the hedge broke and another pathway started. They waited as a young couple with a long-haired chihuahua strolled past them on their way out. Sirius smiled as he remembered Remus’ opinion of the tiny dog breed.

Once they’d passed, Sirius knelt down in front of his own dog and cupped his face. “Alright, Padfoot, I’m going to let you off leash now.” Padfoot’s tail started wagging furiously, his paws tapping the ground with excitement. “But you have to be on your best behaviour. No jumping on people with your muddy paws, okay? You be a good boy now.”

Padfoot looked offended at the implication that he was ever not a good boy, but perked up again as Sirius unclasped his leash from his collar.

“Go find your uncle Jamie a big stick, Pads!” James said excitedly. They watched the dog take off as they started making their way down the path at a slower pace.

Sirius’ eyes were darting around, looking for Remus, and he wondered if Remus was doing the same. He ran his fingers through his hair, tousling it softly, in a way he was pretty sure looked cool and casual.

He was debating if he should pretend to be deep in conversation with James, like he couldn’t care less if he happened to run into the man he’d spoken to on the phone, or if he should tell James to buzz off because maybe Remus would be more likely to come up to him if he were alone– when suddenly, he heard a series of snarls and growling barks. They didn’t sound playful at all.

He and James whipped around, and Sirius was shocked to see Padfoot standing in front of a huge dog that was being held back by its owner as it tried to snap at Padfoot.

Sirius’ dog was big, and usually intimidating, but he appeared small and vulnerable compared to what Sirius honestly had thought was a wolf at first.

Sirius was already rushing over to rescue Padfoot, mentally berating himself for ever letting his beloved dog off leash and out of sight in what must be the most dangerous park in the most dangerous part of Toronto with the most dangerous dogs–

“Moony, leave it!”

Just as Sirius reached Padfoot, crouching down to check if he was alright, his brain made the connection between the dog’s name and the voice. He slowly turned his head and looked directly into a pair of large, warm brown eyes level with his own. Damn if they weren’t as gorgeous as the face surrounding them.

“Uh…” he unhelpfully croaked.

“I’m so sorry,” the man -Remus! This gorgeous Welsh man must be Remus! REMUS!- said, his eyes wide and apologetic. He faced his dog again and repeated the same command. The dog looked as though it were carefully weighing its options, and after a moment he chose to listen, turning to face his owner and sitting at his feet.

Then Padfoot leapt at him with a loud bark.

“Woah, woah, woah!” Sirius grabbed him, arms snaking around his body as he tugged him back, Remus doing the same with his dog. “Padfoot, enough! What’s gotten into you?”

He loosened his grip and leaned back to take in Padfoot’s body language. His tail was wagging a mile a minute, and his eyes were laser focused on Moony but his posture wasn’t aggressive at all. His tongue was even hanging out the side of his mouth. When he wriggled away from Sirius and started bouncing around, sticking his bum in the air and yapping happily, Sirius let out a sigh of exasperation, relief flooding through him.

This wolf-dog was about five seconds away from ripping out Padfoot’s throat– and Padfoot thought it was a game.

“Sorry,” Sirius laughed uncomfortably, “He thinks your dog wants to play with him. I guess he’s never been in a fight before because he clearly doesn’t know the warning signs.”

“No, I’m sorry,” Remus said, having successfully gotten control of Moony. The dog was sitting still, eyeing Padfoot and baring his teeth with a low growl whenever the clueless dog got too close. “He can be a bit possessive…and protective, but I promise he’s harmless.”

Sirius wasn’t at all convinced of that, but he didn’t say anything. He took a treat out of his pocket and told Padfoot to come back over and sit, which he immediately did, also giving Sirius the opportunity to keep a loose hold on his collar.

The two men stood at the same time and stared at each other awkwardly.

Well. That certainly wasn’t how Sirius imagined he would meet Remus for the first time. Crap.

“Hi there!” An arm suddenly came around Sirius’ shoulder, making him jump out of his skin. He’d completely forgotten about his best friend. “I’m James,” he grinned, leaning casually on Sirius and making eyes at– Oh. Sirius also just noticed the woman standing near Remus.

She wasn’t easy to miss (Sirius had really just been preoccupied), especially with her long, fiery red hair. She was pretty, even in Sirius’ gay opinion, and blinked her long lashes back at James. She was smiling in a way that seemed as if she was used to being flirted with, but still appreciated it when it was genuine.

“And this is Sirius,” James continued. “I’d be happy to show you his ass for confirmation.”

Sirius elbowed James in the ribs. Hard. He glanced at Remus, who quickly looked away, his cheeks pinking.

“Hi,” the woman said, holding out her hand to James and –to Sirius’ relief– ignoring his previous comment, “I’m Lily, he’s Remus, and that’s his dog Moony.”

“Nice to meet you,” James said with a winning smile. God it was nauseating watching him swoon.

Lily nodded at James as her eyes met Sirius’. “This must be your friend who put your dog up for adoption?”

“Yep,” Sirius exhaled with the weight of the burden that is James Potter. “That’s him.”

James clearly had no regrets. He was grinning like he’d invented the goddamn microwave.

Remus cleared his throat, his gaze back on Sirius. “Have you exacted your revenge yet?”

“Well he dragged me along to this,” James interjected, “But I’m starting to think of it more as a reward than punishment.” He winked at Lily. She quirked an eyebrow.

Sirius had to admit he enjoyed watching people try to figure out if James was an asshole or just confident and goofy. Sometimes it was both.

“I’ll think of something, don’t you worry,” Sirius said, clapping him on the back, harder than necessary.

Everyone smiled pleasantly at each other, then at the dogs who were in a temporary stalemate, though Moony was still watching Padfoot like a cat surveying a mouse that hadn’t noticed him yet.

Sirius and Remus’ eyes met, and he opened his mouth to say something, before coming up empty and ducking his head to pat Padfoot, stalling for time.

What the hell were they supposed to talk about now? What do you say to someone you flirted with on the phone with no real expectation of ever getting to actually meet them in person?

Here Sirius stood, helpless in front of the witty man with the sexy voice who looked even more adorable than Sirius could have ever imagined.

He was wearing a beanie for Christ’s sake, that his hair curled out from underneath. His dog’s leash had teacups on it. He had freckles. He was adorable.

And Sirius couldn’t think of one freaking thing to say to him.

This might have been the most awkward interaction he’d ever taken part in. And he’d been a third-wheel to James’ break-up at the end of high school. They’d been at Burger Shack. James had cried.

Remus opened and closed his mouth once before settling on, “You made it here alright, then?” Then added, “You mentioned that it’s far for you.”

“Oh, yeah,” Sirius answered gratefully, “I live in the east end, but James has a car so it didn’t take too long.”

“That’s good,” Remus smiled warmly at him. Damn it was a nice smile. “And is the quality of the company up to your standards?”

“Well…” Sirius’ lips twitched as he saw an opportunity to tease the man, “We passed a chihuahua leaving as we came in so it might be up to my standards but I’m shocked it’s up to yours.”

Remus’ smile widened. “Oh I’ve trained Moony to go up to chihuahuas and intimidate them until they leave.”

“Smart,” Sirius laughed– almost certain Remus was kidding.

Moony sat practically immobile next to Remus’ feet, still watching Padfoot like a hawk. Padfoot had been briefly distracted by a brave pug who’d wandered over to sniff his bum before moving on to her next target, and now Padfoot’s attention had been caught by the hostile dog once more.

The black dog ran a circle around Sirius and James, then hopped in place a few times, barking questioningly at the other.

“Padfoot,” Sirius warned, “Leave him alone, bud. Not everyone wants to be your friend.”

“Sorry, handsome.”

Sirius glanced up at Remus in shock, then blushed when he realised Remus was talking to Padfoot– who decided to test the boundaries a little more. He went right up to Moony and pawed at him.

Sirius had never seen Padfoot jump as high as he did when Moony turned as fast as lightning and snapped at him. It was kind of funny. But only because Padfoot wasn’t hurt or even remotely phased. He barked happily again, looking up at Sirius for approval. Sirius shook his head at him.

“Here, Pads,” James intervened, walking past him to get his attention, “Come over here and choose a stick.”

He led the dog over to the tree line where there was a wider variety for him to choose from. Padfoot picked up a thick one with his teeth, about a foot long, and brought it over to James, who took it from his mouth and tossed it as far as he could. Padfoot sped away like a horse out of the gate.

Sirius noticed Lily watching him with a smile on her face. She spared a glance at Remus before wandering over to strike up a conversation with James.

Sirius turned to Remus and smiled at him. “Hopefully we didn’t just initiate our doom,” he joked.

Remus laughed. “Perhaps we should start coming up with strategies to fend off their attacks?”

“I’ll advise you now that you should probably keep your toiletries in a locked room– unless you want white hair and purple skin.”

“I see,” Remus raised his eyebrows, the corners of his mouth pulling up, “Bleach in the shampoo and dye in the shower gel?”

“Yep.”

“Wow. He did that to you?”

“Nah, a friend, thankfully. He uses bar soap now.”

Remus laughed again, and Sirius was counting each one as a win. “I’m covered there,” the Welsh man continued, “Those five-in-one bottles of shower gel, shampoo, body wash… conditioner… and I don’t know what else– are very North American.”

“Excuse me, I have a shampoo / body wash combo and it’s great. It saves time!”

“How can it possibly save time when you’re still washing the same parts at the same speed?”

“I don’t have to put one bottle away to open another one,” Sirius stated, as though it should be obvious.

Remus was making a face at him like he was contemplating Sirius’ sanity but enjoying it all the same. “Are those five seconds rather crucial to your day?”

“They are actually,” Sirius replied thoughtfully, “Every second matters when you’re not a morning person.”

“True. I’m a night shower person though.”

“What?” Sirius huffed, “But showers wake you up!”

“Not me,” Remus disagreed, something cheeky twinkling in his eye, “I like to take long, hot, relaxing showers before bed.”

“Huh.” Sirius swallowed, his throat suddenly dry as the image of this man in the shower sprang to mind. He must have freckles everywhere. “I’ll have to try that.”

“Mm, you should.” The way Remus was smiling at him made it clear he knew exactly what was going through Sirius’ head.

He felt his cheeks flush and he looked over at James to check on him.

He was still tossing the stick for Padfoot, looking as though his arm was getting tired, but definitely not tiring of talking to the red head. She was leaning in close and saying something to him. He glanced over at Sirius and Remus, then nodded at her, and the two of them started walking back.

“You know, Remus,” Lily said as she got closer, “I would love a coffee from that little place with the white squirrel on the door.”

Remus narrowed his eyes at her. “Uh huh.”

“And I would love to get to know James and Padfoot more.”

“Uh huh.”

“Why don’t he and I watch the dogs while you and Sirius go get coffee?”

“That’s the best idea I’ve heard all day,” James cooed.

Remus shook his head fondly at his friend, then gave Sirius a questioning look.

Sirius smiled and lifted a shoulder. “Sure, let’s go.” He stepped towards Remus and then paused, turning back to James. “Please keep an eye on Padfoot and don’t get distracted by the pretty girl.”

James saluted him stoically.

“It’s this way,” Remus said, nodding towards the path he and James had come down, and they set off on their spontaneous coffee run.

***

“Can I also get two Nanaimo bars please?”

Sirius wrinkled his nose at Remus’ request to the barista, but luckily Remus didn’t notice.

Remus thanked them as they went to retrieve his order, then turned to Sirius, a shy smile on his face. “Do you want to sit for a few minutes before heading back? I’m sure they can wait for their coffees. I doubt Lily is even expecting me to remember to get her one,” he added with a chuckle.

“Oh? Does she think you’re forgetful?”

“No, she thinks I’m easily distracted by attractive men.”

Sirius bit back a smile. “I’ll get a table,” he said, turning away before Remus could see him blush.

He went over to a small table with two chairs by the window of the little coffee shop. It was surprisingly quiet for a Saturday afternoon, but it was nice outside so most people probably wanted their drinks to go.

He set down his and James’ coffees (a latte with oat milk and an iced caramel something because James had no shame in admitting he hated the taste of black coffee), then sat in one of the chairs and pulled out his phone while he waited for Remus.

No texts from James about Padfoot running away or getting into a bloody brawl, so that was a good sign. He knew James was probably too wrapped up in Lily to check his phone but decided to send him a quick message anyway.

“Might be more than a few minutes,” he typed, adding a coffee mug emoji.

He was surprised to receive a reply moments later. It was an eggplant emoji and a string of hearts.

Remus came over just as Sirius sent back a middle finger. He set a coffee and a tea on the table, as well as a plate with two Nanaimo bars on it. Sirius looked up at him questioningly.

“I got one for you, hope that’s okay,” he smiled.

“That’s not for Lily?” Sirius asked (hopefully).

Remus shook his head, then frowned. “You’re not allergic, are you?”

He should say yes. He should always say he was allergic instead of just not liking things. People are judgy about picky eaters.

“Nope,” he replied instead, forcing a smile as he reached out to take a bar, “Thank you.” He steeled himself before taking a small bite, grinning at Remus quickly before taking a huge gulp of his latte to wash it down, burning his tongue in the process.

Remus was watching him, but decided not to comment, as he took a much more significant bite of his own bar.

“So, um…” Sirius started, “Do you live around here?”

“Mmh, not too far.”

“Cool, cool. You come here often?”

The other man nodded in response, taking another bite instead of saving Sirius from holding the conversation on his own.

“Cool,” Sirius looked around him, searching his head for something else to ask, “Uh, do you have any siblings?”

Remus smiled as he chewed, apparently amused by Sirius’ cliché date questions. “Yes,” he answered once he’d swallowed, “I have a younger brother. He’s back home in Wales. How about you?”

“I also have a younger brother. Where are you from?”

Remus blinked at him a few times. “Wales.”

“Oh, right.”

Why, Sirius? Why?

“Do you, um…” he fumbled, “Have you been to the movies lately?”

“Nope.”

Sirius nodded. His knee started bouncing uncontrollably fast. “Do you…what do you like to do in your spare time?”

This was a nightmare. He was in a living nightmare.

Remus tilted his head to the side, barely containing his laughter. “Have you ever actually gone for coffee with someone before?”

Sirius, his face so hot he actually felt sweat beading on his forehead, held his chin up high. “No, this is actually the first time I’ve left my house in twenty-five years.”

“That explains it.”

Sirius watched as Remus’ shoulders started shaking with silent laughter. He groaned and put his head in his hands. This only made Remus laugh more.

“I don’t know why this is so awkward…I’m normally really good on dates!”

“Don’t worry, I’m having a great time. Usually I’m the one feeling a bit awkward, but something about watching this mess unfold in front of me is boosting my confidence.”

“Glad to be of service to you, Remus.”

“Want to start over?”

Sirius took a slow, deep breath, and sat up straight. “Yes please.”

“Where are you from, Sirius?”

“Here,” he replied, as if it were obvious, which he realised it wasn’t. “I mean yeah, I was born and raised here. My parents are from Quebec.”

“You speak French?”

“Everyone in Canada speaks French.”

Remus’ brows pulled together slightly with curiosity. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Sirius shrugged, taking another sip of his coffee, “Some of them just aren’t any good at it.”

He was rewarded with another wide smile from the man across from him.

The conversation flowed much more smoothly after that –thank God– and Sirius felt more comfortable with every passing minute, more confident with every laugh he got from Remus.

Remus was witty, smart, and loved to interject Sirius’ stories with a one-liner that would have Sirius cracking up.

He found out more about Remus’ family, how long he’d been in Canada for, what he’d gone to school for, where he was working now… He was eating it up. He didn’t think he’d ever enjoyed listening to someone talk this much.

After what had felt like five minutes but in actuality was closer to thirty, their drinks and Remus’ dessert were long gone. All that remained was the innocent-looking bar in front of Sirius, one bite taken out of it.

Remus glanced down at it now. “Is it possible you just don’t like Nanaimo bars?”

“No, I do!” Sirius refuted– a bold face lie, “They’re, um, really good.” Sirius picked up the offending thing, looking at it with a frown before ever so slowly lifting it to his lips.

Remus watched him with one brow raised, an amused expression on his face as Sirius took a teeny tiny bite off the top. That wasn’t so bad. He took another, bigger bite, tasting the first layer of chocolate (delicious), then the middle layer of custard (pretty good), and then unfortunately got some of the coconut and graham cracker crust (disgusting). He swallowed it as quickly as possible.

Remus smiled, crossed his arms, and leaned forward to rest his elbows on the table.

“You don’t have to pretend to like it just to be nice, you know,” he said, a smirk on his face that told Sirius he was remembering the same words Sirius had spoken to him on the phone.

Sirius waited a beat before releasing a large breath, as though he’d been holding in a great secret. “You’re right, you’re absolutely right.”

He dropped the bar and shoved the plate away from him with flair, startling a laugh out of Remus. He let his true displeasure show on his face. “I do not like Nanaimo bars. I don’t know why it’s my instinct to just agree with everything the other person says on a date,” Sirius mused, “The first few at least. I guess I figure I should wait a bit to show my argumentative, picky side, you know?”

“Mmh,” Remus hummed in agreement, “Bickering about which baked-good to order and then insulting each other’s preferences is more of a fourth date thing.”

“Exactly.”

“I feel as if we blew through at least a couple of dates on the phone, though. I mean, I don’t usually start talking about my future with someone until date ten or eleven, so I think we’ve skipped ahead a bit. I’d be happy for you to show me how argumentative and picky you are.”

“Okay,” Sirius chuckled.

“Would you like to explain why you clearly have terrible taste in food?”

Sirius scoffed, highly offended. “It’s not my taste that needs to be in question here. I detest coconut. It’s disgusting. And anyone who enjoys it clearly hates themselves.”

“Ah,” Remus nodded slowly, then frowned. “And which date do you usually reserve your high-maintenance, dramatic side for?”

“Probably eighteen or nineteen.”

“Good call.”

Sirius grinned at him, feeling just as giddy as he had on the phone when their banter back and forth came as easily as it did for Sirius with James– who he’d known since he was eleven.

“You really hate coconut?” Remus asked, sounding genuinely curious.

“Well,” Sirius put on his teaching voice, having given this speech before, “It’s not a blanket statement actually. It’s nuanced.”

“Of course it is.”

“Coconut milk in curry is good,” he began to explain, “Pina Coladas are good– if there’s enough rum in them. But coconut water? Ugh,” he cringed, “Gross. Shredded coconut in carrot cake? Criminal. Why would you ruin cake like that?”

Remus’ eyes were glittering with humour, evidently enjoying Sirius’ rant.

“Nanaimo bars?” Sirius continued, “I know it makes me a bad Canadian but no, thank you.”

“It sounds like the texture of coconut puts you off, and you only tolerate it in liquid form when the taste is almost completely masked.”

“Correct. It just reminds me of suntan oil,” he scrunched his nose, remembering every time he’d ever unknowingly bitten into something and his taste buds were assaulted. “Every time I taste coconut I feel like I'm eating Hawaiian Tropic.”

“How do you know what Hawaiian Tropic tastes like?”

“I know what it smells like and the smell is half the taste, Remus,” he stated matter-of-factly.

“True,” Remus agreed. He waited to see if Sirius was done, which he was, before continuing. “Wow. Well, thank you for sharing that with me. I apologize for traumatizing you with this innocent baked-good. I’d assumed all Canadians enjoyed them.”

“That’s rude. You think we all love poutine too?”

Remus’ eyes flicked to the side before landing back on Sirius. “Probably?”

“Yeah, probably,” Sirius happily conceded, “It’s too delicious.”

“Maybe we can go for poutine next time,” Remus suggested.

Sirius grinned. “Yeah, I’d–”

“Or ‘beaver tails!’ Can you please explain to me what the bloody hell a ‘beaver tail’ is? Because it sounds revolting.”

“You’ve been here for three years and you’ve never had a Beavertail?”

“No!”

“Alright,” Sirius furrowed his brow, as if he were putting a plan together in his head, “I have to renew my shotgun licence but then I’ll take you hunting. They’re better fresh.”

Remus’ face dropped in horror. “Wait– you– you don’t actually hunt beavers?”

“Well, yeah,” he replied simply, frowning at him.

He only lasted a few more seconds before bursting out laughing.

“Oh my god, your face, Remus,” he cried, clutching his stomach as Remus crossed his arms and rolled his eyes to the heavens. “Real beavers? Oh my god. As if.”

“Yeah, you got me,” Remus grumbled, though he was pressing his lips together to keep from smiling.

“It’s just fried dough with cinnamon and sugar in the shape of a beaver tail!” Sirius explained, small uncontrollable laughs still bubbling up in his chest like hiccups. “I think I owe you one now.”

“I think you do.”

“It’s a date.”

They smiled at each other again, and then Remus’ phone chirped in his pocket. He gave Sirius a quick apologetic glance as he fished it out, but apparently it wasn’t that important because he just set his phone on the table face-down.

The phone reminded him of something. “Do you want my number?” he asked, not wanting to leave today without being able to contact Remus again.

“Oh–” Remus smiled sheepishly, “Well, I already saved it in my phone… From the ad.”

Ah, the afternoon had been going so well, Sirius had blissfully forgotten about how they’d actually gotten there.

“I didn’t know if it would be alright to text you, so I didn’t.”

“That was very respectful of you,” Sirius commented. “But, um, yeah you can text me. If you want.”

“Alright, I will,” Remus smiled, and Sirius mirrored it. Then Remus’ face turned thoughtful. “You know,” he started, and Sirius sat up straighter at the sincere tone, “I’ve actually been looking for a sub to try out this new riding crop on, so this will be perfect.”

Sirius’ lips parted in shock.

He’d said it so seriously, so genuinely, Sirius honestly couldn’t tell if he was joking or not. Remus’ face gave nothing away. His gaze was steady on Sirius, whose words were caught somewhere in his sternum.

He couldn’t accuse Remus of joking, because that would be offensive, right? Sirius didn’t want to make fun of his…preferences.

But also… what the actual f–

Remus shrugged casually and stood, collecting the empty coffee cups and the plate from the table and depositing them in the proper places, then came back over, where Sirius still sat, speechless. Remus picked up Lily’s now-cold coffee, and was holding Sirius’ neglected Nanaimo bar in his other hand.

Sirius slowly looked up at him. Remus’ eyes were on his, hardly blinking, and the steady eye contact made Sirius’ stomach squirm. Then Remus, gaze still firm, took a large bite of the bar, right over Sirius’ smaller one.

He didn’t know why, but he found that hot as hell.

“Want to go?” Remus asked a moment later, like he wasn’t turning Sirius into a goddamn puddle of sexual tension right there and then.

“Mmh,” was all he could manage. He wasn’t even sure his legs would be able to hold him if he stood. But they did, and he followed Remus out of the coffee shop, remembering to swipe James’ coffee at the last second.

They walked in silence down the street, then waited to cross at the intersection, and through the southern entrance of Trinity Bellwoods in the direction of the dog park.

Remus had finished the Nanaimo bar, and kept smiling at Sirius every few feet. Sirius thought he smiled back, but honestly he was lost in his own mind. Not with racing thoughts, though; his mind was actually blissfully quiet, like he’d disconnected from his body and was off floating somewhere–

Oh God. He was describing sub-space.

He ran a hand through his hair, more panicky than the casual movement he’d gone for earlier that afternoon.

“Are you alright?”

He glanced at Remus, who was looking at him nervously for some reason.

“Yeah, yeah, of course.”

“Hey,” Remus put his hand on Sirius’ arm, gently bringing him to a stop. “Er, look, Sirius, I don’t want to read this wrong.”

He blinked up at Remus, confused as to what he was talking about.

Remus’ eyes were a little wide, he looked worried. “Did I actually make you uncomfortable with that comment?” he asked. “Because I was kidding– I was just joking because of what James wrote in that ad.”

Apparently Sirius had in fact been off in…if not sub-space then lala land, because it took him a few moments to understand what Remus was referring to. When he did, he felt a warm rush of affection for this man, who was practically still a stranger to him but cared enough to be concerned about his feelings at that moment.

“Not that that, er, BDSM, is funny, of course,” Remus continued, beginning to ramble nervously when Sirius simply stared back at him, “If you’re into that, it’s perfectly normal, and er, you know, I would be– I’m open to trying– I mean I’m usually open about things like that but if you’re not that’s alright too, and, ah, I’m getting ahead of myself, we don’t– I’m not presuming anything, I don’t–”

Sirius tugged on Remus’ jacket, gently maneuvering him back a few steps until he could press him against a large maple tree, his other hand reaching up to gently rest on Remus’ neck. Remus’ eyes widened in surprise for only a moment, before his face relaxed and his gaze slid down to focus on Sirius’ mouth. He tilted his head down at the same time as Sirius tilted his chin up, their lips meeting in a kiss.

It was slow and soft and over far too quickly for Sirius’ liking, but he was conscious of all the people around them.

Remus didn’t seem particularly bothered by the brevity, judging by the smile on his lips. “That was nice,” he remarked.

“It was,” Sirius agreed, breathing a laugh through his nose.

“Do I taste like suntan oil?”

Sirius clicked his tongue regrettably. “You do.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay, I didn’t mind so much this time.”

Remus leaned in and brought their lips together again, a short and sweet kiss that left Sirius wanting so much more. He was slow to lean back.

“We should probably rescue James and Lily,” Remus said a few seconds later.

Sirius nodded. “Yeah,” he agreed, stepping away to free Remus so they could keep walking. He searched around for a distraction so that he didn’t yank the man next to him off the trail and over to a conveniently secluded spot behind some bushes nearby. “I can’t believe our dogs don’t get along,” he went with, “That’s… not ideal.”

“I’m sorry about that,” Remus winced, “He’s been really out of sorts since my other dog passed away. Although, he’s never really had the patience for puppies– or dogs that act like them.”

“Fair enough, Padfoot is a little wild.”

“He’s very sweet,” Remus said, then smiled wryly at Sirius, “It’s just a shame you don’t treat him well at all.”

“Mm yes,” Sirius nodded solemnly, immediately picking up on Remus’ teasing tone, “He’s very neglected. No love or treats or belly rubs more than every… ten minutes?”

“And you don’t let him sleep in your bed. That’s just cruel.”

“He has never known love.”

“It’s too bad you’re keeping him. I’d let him sleep in my bed.”

“Lucky boy,” Sirius winked boldly.

Remus cleared his throat, his neck looking a little pick. “Well, maybe you– er,” he trailed off as his eyes fixated on something ahead of them, then said, “Uh oh.”

Sirius raised his eyebrows, then looked in the direction Remus’ attention had been drawn. They had just come up to the edge of the top of the dog park, right before the path dipped down, and Sirius’ eyes darted around until he spotted what Remus had a moment ago.

James was flat on his ass in the mud, a grumpy expression on his face as he attempted to stand up, inhibited by how slippery the ground was. Lily was standing nearby, a hand covering her mouth, holding Moony close to her by the leash. Padfoot was sniffing James curiously, also covered in mud.

The two men glanced at each other and then hurried down the hill.

“James,” Sirius called when they were close enough, “You okay?”

“Yep,” he said, his voice strained as he succeeded in standing, “But your dog owes me a dry-cleaning bill.”

He heard a snort, and realized Lily was laughing behind her hand, her green eyes a little wet. “He’s been trying so hard,” she said sympathetically when she’d lowered her hand, “Padfoot’s been giving him a run for his money. He’s desperate to be friends with Moony.”

“Has Moony been okay?” Remus asked as he walked over to his friend and dog, passing Lily the coffee he was still holding. Sirius did the same to James, who took it gratefully, downing half of it in one gulp like he was dying of thirst.

Moony had stood up when he saw Remus, his tail wagging happily at the return of his owner. Sirius hadn’t realized the animal was capable of being anything other than angry and snarly, but he looked as joyful as a puppy when Remus greeted him.

“He…” Lily hesitated, and Remus glanced up at her alarmedly, “He is not Padfoot’s biggest fan. But he hasn’t tried to bite his head off in the last few minutes, so that’s an improvement.”

“Bloody hell, sorry to leave you with that, Lils.”

She waved him off. “It’s fine, we had fun,” she said with a smile in James’ direction. The man looked very pleased with himself.

Sirius was receiving his own enthusiastic greeting, as if he’d been gone from Padfoot for thirty days instead of thirty minutes, and he gave him another treat from his pocket when Padfoot sat and gazed up at him with round puppy eyes.

“Does Moony like liver treats?” he asked Remus.

“Definitely.”

Sirius stepped over to Moony and held out his hand, palm up, for investigating. The dog sniffed him curiously, his tail wagging slowly, until he saw Padfoot come closer.

“Sit, Pads,” Sirius told him. Padfoot plopped his bum on the ground, looking betrayed as he witnessed Sirius giving his attention to another canine. “Here, Moony, good boy.” Remus’ dog took the liver treat happily, and Sirius swore he saw him give Padfoot a ‘ha ha’ look.

“They’re not beaver livers, are they?” Remus teased.

Sirius laughed, while James and Lily glanced at each other in confusion. “That’s a Canadian delicacy, Remus.”

“What do you know about beavers, eh, Sirius?” James quipped, coming over and pinching Sirius’ bum.

“Ugh, if you weren’t my ride home I would leave you here, you cretin.”

“Oh, crap,” James glanced at his watch, “Speaking of that– we have to go.”

“Right,” Sirius nodded; he and James were heading to the Potter’s place for an evening of board games and pizza, a tradition they’d held since high school.

Sirius met Remus’ eyes.

“So–” they started at the same time, then laughed.

“You have my number,” Sirius said.

“I’ll text you about going for poutine?”

“We’re going for poutine?” James interjected– which was followed by a beat of silence.

“I don’t think we’re invited,” Lily pretended to whisper, “But maybe we can dog-sit.”

James grinned at her, and Sirius was looking forward to hearing what had transpired between the two of them.

“I’ll message you the name of that place with the penis waffles I was talking about,” James said to her.

“Oh my god, Remus,” she grabbed his arm excitedly, “Did you hear about this?”

“What? Penis waffles?” He repeated incredulously, “Is that a euphemism?”

“Nope,” James replied, “Literally waffles in the shape of penises.”

“Huh,” Remus murmured, “I don’t think I’ll put that on the itinerary the next time my family comes to visit.”

Lily bumped her hip against his in an affectionate way. “Suit yourself.” She then turned to James to say goodbye, holding out her phone to get his number.

Remus and Sirius smiled at each other, stepping a little closer while their friends were occupied. “I’m glad you made it to the park today,” Remus said softly.

“It was quite the journey across the city,” Sirius joked, “But in the end it was worth it.”

“Next time I’ll have to come to you. Probably without Moony,” he added with a wince.

“I’m sure they’ll become friends…” Sirius put out optimistically. Though, judging by the way Moony was glaring at Padfoot, that seemed unlikely. Remus looked like he was thinking the same thing.

“Ready?” James asked as he walked over. He reached out to shake Remus’ hand. “Nice meeting you, man.”

“You too,” he replied, eyes quickly returning to Sirius’.

“Bye then?”

Remus laughed. “Bye then.”

Sirius waved at Lily, who he hadn’t really had the chance to talk to at all, but he had a feeling he’d be seeing much more of her.

He started walking away, telling Padfoot it was time to leave, but the dog didn’t move. His round eyes were on Sirius, but one of his ears was twitching back, listening to something else. Sirius told him again to come, and Padfoot stood up, but he still didn’t move closer.

Then, Padfoot suddenly bolted to the side, leaping over to Moony and licking him from the tip of his nose to the top of his ear, before dashing away to Sirius’ side.

Moony stumbled back into a sitting position, looking shocked and affronted.

Remus and Sirius shared a look of surprise and incredulity, slow smiles growing on their faces.

He could still feel that warm grin on his back, like a sunbeam shining down on him, as he and James turned to walk up and out of the park.

Sirius clipped Padfoot’s leash on again, leaning down to kiss the top of his muddy dog’s head. He hoped Moony would learn to like him, that the two dogs would become friends eventually, even if it took some time. Sirius wouldn’t mind that at all. Hopefully there would be many opportunities for them to do so.

He smiled at James, who, once out of earshot, had immediately launched into a recap of every moment of his interaction with Lily. To Sirius’ surprise, James didn’t sound like a lovesick puppy whose attention had simply been caught by the ‘pretty’– he sounded in awe of her, like there were levels of admiration and curiosity that had been added on top of the attraction. Sirius had a good feeling about it.

“What a great day this turned out to be,” James crooned with a bounce in his step that rivalled Padfoot’s.

Sirius couldn't have agreed more.

#wolfstar #ficbyweightyghosts #Wolfstar fanfiction #wolfstar fluff #marauders in canada #canadian sirius black #non-magical AU #Harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #wolfstar fanfic #Sirius Black #Remus Lupin #James Potter #Lily Evans #jily #jily fanfiction #padfoot #moony

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nemo-of-house-hamartia · 3 years

Text

In the Heat of The Moment

Chapter 3 - Confrontation

Ch.1, Ch.2

Words Count: 8736

Warning: None

23rd January 1909

The small room on the second floor of the hideout was veiled by a soft penumbra, giving the whole place a dreamlike appearance. Only a few rays of the rising winter sun were daring to peek through the drawn curtains of the old room, with its antiquated wallpapers and the worn-out leather upholstery of the armchair close by.

But neither of the two people hiding in that small alcove gave thoughts to their surroundings, their attention captured by each other's low voices and hushed moans, enveloped as they were in the deepest of embraces.

Fingers gripping tight, almost digging into her soft buttocks, the man held the young woman's hips against his own, guiding her as she rode the waves of her own pleasure.

At the sound of her breathy voice calling for his name - desperate, wanting, needy - the man felt his own release coming, bucking his hips and blocking hers against his own, burying himself so deep into her, all he wanted was to get lost in that moment of stolen ecstasy.

Both in a blissful daze, the young woman plopped on the man's strong chest, dark sensual eyes meeting steel grey ones in a gaze filled with languid satisfaction, their heartbeats synchronized and slowing to a peaceful rhythm.

For a second, they both stood still, the moment of the afterglow so surreal they thought even one breath might break that fragile reality.

Then, Emmett Frye spoke.

"I can't keep seeing you like this, Melanie," he murmured, his voice low, coated with a huskiness that came from pleasure, as he kissed the young woman's brows, soft pecks that left her wanting for more. "You know I can never make an honest woman out of you,"

He trailed down her nose and found her lips with his, brushing against them at first, then gently pressing so that she would open them for him.

The young woman whined a little as she wrapped her arms around the older man's shoulders.

"What if I don't want to be an honest woman? What if I want to be just your woman?”

Emmett chuckled against her lips, as he trailed down her neck, finding where her pulse was. He gave her a little nip and was rewarded with a low moan that brought a smile to his face.

"Your father would kill me, Miss Abberline,"

"My father would have a reason to kill you for what we already do. Besides, he did know your father, Mr. Frye."

"Precisely why we can't keep seeing each other like this. He would get a heart attack knowing that you are mingling with me,”

"Why are you so afraid of my father finding out? Or others, for that matter?"

Emmett looked at her for a moment; then, his lips twitched up, his smile never reaching his eyes.

"Fear has nothing to do with it, Mel.”

“Lies,” she smirked.

He raised an eyebrow, barely blinking.

“I am not afraid, Mel. I never am. Of anyone.”

"That’s a lie, Emmett Frye," she chuckled, leaning in to kiss him again.

"Maybe," He conceded once, knowing instead that now he was lying.

After what had happened to him, to his family, in 1888, fear had no business having a place in his soul.

He had been scared once, and his fear had cost him something so great, he still bore the consequences - the scars- of that moment of weakness of his heart.

Never again he would be afraid. Never again he would let terror rule him.

Was he happy about everything he had done to preserve his family, to help his father take back the gang after that demon Jack had devastated all that his parents had built together in twenty years… to everything that he had witnessed throughout the years, everything that had molded him to become the man he was today?

The truth was he couldn’t really say, and there wasn’t really anything that he could do to change what had been.

But if he were proud of himself, of who he had become, that was a totally different matter altogether.

“What’s this?” asked Melanie, taking him away from his thoughts, as she looked at the necklace around his neck.

It was a leather cord with a ring hanging from it.

“My wife’s wedding ring,” he said, grabbing a cigarette from the packet on the bedside table and lighting it up, taking a drag from it.

The young woman looked at the golden band, inspecting it carefully, her eyes gleaming with curiosity, an unspoken question on her lips.

“She’s dead,” Emmett murmured with his low, raspy voice, gently taking the wedding band from her hand and hiding it underneath his woolen shirt.

“What happened?” she asked,

The older man looked into her eyes, not speaking at first, his gaze so intense the young woman thought he could read right into her soul.

“Life happened, Mel,” he said, his voice final, hiding a warning to not thread any further in the murky waters where all that he pained about still dwelled.

Even if almost a decade had passed, reminiscing was still intolerable for him. There were certain memories he had sworn to keep barred from anyone, including himself. His wife belonged there, deep within his heart...the only place where he knew she would truly be safe and sound.

He sighed, keeping his hand on the now hidden golden band, an unconscious protective gesture that he had started to do ever since his wife had been taken away from him.

Melanie stood pensive for one moment. She was sure that there was much more behind that, but she dared not to ask any further.

She raised her big dark eyes, staring into his for a moment: she was so curious to know more about him, to know more about that man whose gaze saw everything that happened around him and yet never let anything transpire through them.

But she knew that with him, probing and insisting would do no good.

If anything, it would make him grow more distant.

She leaned in to take the cigarette from his lips and brought it to her own.

“Keep your secrets, Mr. Frye,” she chuckled with a tiny smile. “ One day, I will be able to discover them all,”

He looked at her, his face growing even more serious.

"Don't tread in places where you should not go, little dove," he murmured, caressing her cheek with his knuckles, each of his gestures always so delicate, as if she was a doll made of the most delicate material.

Melanie felt the coarse, calloused skin of his hand, looking at the grazed skin - a testimony to all the fight he had taken part in?

Or maybe, she pondered, a testimony of all the fight he had caused?

She knew so little of the man in front of her, whatever he decided to show her. Yet, she wanted to know more. She had seen glimpses of a fire burning in his cold eyes. And she wanted to find out what ignited those flames.

A loud knock on the door made them turn their heads.

"Em," called the rough voice of Uriel from outside the room. “We got a call from one of our strongholds in Lambeth. Trouble is brewing in the neighbourhood. The Carvers are at it again. We need to go now.”

Emmett kept his silence, his face a pool of still water, as he quickly considered all of his options.

“Duty calls?” inquired Melanie, beaming with excitement. “Can I come with you? I have never seen what you actually do! I could be of help!”

He looked straight into her eyes, his stare so cold it felt as if winter had found its home there.

“That’s out of the question, Melanie. This is not a game. You are not to go anywhere near where the Carvers operate.” He said, getting out of bed and starting to put his clothes on. “Now dress up. Jeremy will bring you back to your parents’ home,”

“I’m not a child, Emmett! I don’t need to be chaperoned!” she blurted out, jumping out of the bed to follow him. “You can’t order me around! I’m not one of your underlings!”

He turned and took her face in his hands, caressing her cheeks with his thumb.

When he spoke, his low voice was so soft, almost jarring to hear compared to the chilliness of his gaze. Yet, the younger woman was sure she had seen it softening as well.

“I am not ordering you, Mel,” he murmured, kissing her brow, lingering there, taking in her perfume of violets and roses. “God only knows that no force on Earth can actually make you do something you do not want to do. No, I am asking you not to follow me. It is not your place to do so, and I want you out of harm’s way,”

She relented, for just one moment, her eyes lowering to find where his golden band was still hidden.

“It’s because of what happened to your wife?” she blurted out, without thinking.

Emmett kept his silence, his face hardening at that.

“Em! Kiss that harlot goodbye and let’s go! We need to go!” knocked Uriel again, with more insistence this time.

Melanie’s face morphed in a mask of bewilderment, her mouth gaping.

“W-what did he just call me?” she bellowed, making way to the door to face the man herself. “Why, of all the things I have been calle-”

Emmett took her by the arm, and stopped her in her tracks, pulling her back against his chest.

He took her face in his hands and dove down to kiss her in that way that always sent chills of pure pleasure down her spine, taking her breath away.

Melanie could do nothing but mellow in that kiss, a soft moan drowning in her throat.

Damn the man for knowing how to make her melt in his arms!

“We do not have time for this,” Emmett murmured, breaking the kiss. “I need to sort things out in the borough,”

With one last peck, he put his coat on and kissed her lips one more time.

“When will we see each other again?” she asked, resisting the urge to throw herself in his arms.

He stopped and looked at her.

“Mel, I told you-”

“I know fairly well what you’ve told me, Mr. Frye. And I’m asking you: when will we see each other again?”

Emmett could only smile at her. Stubborn like no one else in the world. He knew she wouldn’t let go of him until she heard what she wanted to hear.

“Soon, I hope,” he conceded. “My men will see you are delivered back to your parents safe and sound,”

Then, for the spark of a moment, he hesitated, his eyes wandering on her determined expression. He gripped the knob of the door, willing himself to go.

“Go home, little dove, and be safe. Leave the danger of the world to this old rook,”

And without turning back, he left the room with a quick stride.

As Melanie accompanied him with her gaze, she noticed Uriel glancing at her, an amused look on his clean shaved face.

“Sorry to interrupt, Missy, but duty calls. You know how it is,” he snickered, smirking as he eyed the woman in front of him.

She narrowed her eyes, knowing that the young man wasn’t sorry at all.

Offended yet relentless, she held her gaze, defiant as ever: she knew Uriel, more than she cared to. Growing up, she had plenty of opportunities to get to meet the most boisterous of the Frye children whenever Mrs. Dorothea would come and visit her mother, Magnolia. Uriel was the exact copy of his twin Gabriel, from his curly dark hair down to his tall frame; but where Gabriel’s eyes always twinkled with a mischievous yet kind light, in Uriel’s there was always a hint of coldness that made them appear like two dark voids, where no warmth ever dwelled.

“You should learn how to properly talk to a lady, Uriel,”

His smile widened, turning into a crooked smirk.

“When I meet one, I’ll make sure to remember your advice, Mel,”

And before she had the chance to answer him, he tipped the brim of his hat and closed the door behind himself with an unceremonious bang.

*****

“About fuckin’ time, Em,” growled Uriel, his smile all but disappeared, as he followed his brother down the stairs, his dark coat flapping behind him. They crossed the street and a car passed so close to them, Uriel turned to shout at the driver, his curse drowned by the roaring of the engine as the vehicle sped up. Rolling his eyes, Emmett caught him by the arm, dragging him toward where their car was.

“We don’t have time for this. We need to hurry,”

“Yet you had all the time to kiss that harlot goodbye, it seems,”

“Uriel, you are my brother and I love you...but call Melanie a ‘harlot’ one more time, and we are going to have a problem, you and I,”

The younger man huffed as he started the engine up. “Not calling her that won’t make any difference about what she is. You know about her reputation,”

Emmett glared at him. “Uriel, enough. That is not one of your bloody business! I do not know what Mel has done to you-”

“She’s an Abberline, Emmett! You know I don’t have much love for coppers or any of their offspring, no matter how much Papa used to like her pa!”

“But she is also Eva’s friend! And Mrs.Abberline is one of Mother’s dearest friends! Couldn’t you show some respect at least for their sake?”

Uriel stared him square in the eyes, not relenting for one moment.

“You know that bringing up our sister and mother won’t make a difference, don’t you?

Emmett sighed. His younger brother had always been a piece of work, ever since he had started to talk coherently.

“Keep all that animosity for the Carvers, Uri. We will need it. Drive now, and inform me of the situation,”

"We have captured two of their men. Underlings, but they seem to know something. Still, Albert hasn’t managed to make them talk yet,”

"No torture on them, I hope?"

Uriel smiled for the first time, his lips thinning in a cruel smirk.

"No need for that. We just told them that The Executioner was on his way," he chuckled, turning to look at his brother, a light of admiration in his eyes. “Should’ve seen their faces, Emmett. I could swear one of’em pissed himself when he heard that.” Emmett heard Uriel snigger, almost unable to contain his excitement. “He ain’t going to have mercy on you,’ I said to those pissers,”

The Executioner, Emmett thought, his lips pursing in a thin line of disapproval. That moniker had been following him his entire adult life. He knew he had long earned that reputation ever since that name had been given to him, but funnily enough, the moniker hadn't belonged to him in the first place.

It was a misconception.

No, that name truly belonged to the one that had killed Jack The Ripper, after Jack had sent London in a frenzy during the Autumn of Terror; it was given by the press after Abberline had found Jack slashed to death, his face butchered beyond any possible recognition.

Emmett mused, for a moment, what the people would think if they knew that The Executioner had been, in truth, a woman.

My own mother, he thought, clenching his jaw.

Feeling something dreadful bubbling up in his chest, he grabbed another cigarette and lit it up, taking a long drag to fill up his lungs and soul with that poison fumes that always brought him relief.

He smoked too much, he knew that. His parents never ceased to tell him to reduce the number of cigarettes he smoked each day, and yet, he couldn’t help himself: since 1888, it was one of the few ways to calm his frazzled nerves.

He still remembered Inspector Abberline offering him one cigarette- his first - after the policeman found him, his aunt Evie and his mother Dorothea in one of Lambeth's underground cells, the three of them standing as a human wall around his half-dead father and his siblings Eva and Robin, maimed and beaten and scared to death.

Emmett closed his eyes, all memories flooding his mind, unwanted, unsought, yet unrelenting as they gripped his soul with those unforgiving talons.

He still recalled the foul stench of that cold dark cell, a gagging mixture of molding walls, human waste, and lingering sickness, so strong and pungent, it still made his stomach queasy at the mere thought.

Emmett had only been a boy of sixteen years of age, but seeing his father - his hero - curled up on the cold floor, barely moving, barely breathing, and yet, still holding his younger maimed children in his arms, still trying to protect them even when he had no strengths to spare for himself… that sight had filled him with such hopelessness, such fear, he remembered starting to shake like a leaf at the mercy of the chilling winter winds.

Emmett shuddered, as the memories shifted once more, to the cracking of a whip as it lashed against the soft tissues of a body, over and over and over again, each cracks followed by a scream of pure wrath and agony.

It was all still as clear as the day he had witnessed all of that.

Seeing his father and siblings like that had left him broken.

But seeing his gentle, placid mother - a woman unwilling to even raise her voice to reprimand her children - become possessed by a murderous blind rage at the sight of her husband's limp body and her abducted children wasting away… seeing her infer lashes after lashes to the miscreant -the demon- that had dared to try to destroy their family...it all had left a mark on Emmett that still came back to torment him, in sleep and wake alike.

And only smoking could help him calm down.

He reckoned that it was due to the fact that the cigarette offered by the kind Inspector had been the first gentle gesture after all the horrors he had witnessed, after all the despair he had felt, and that small gift had seemed like a blessing, at that moment. He only remembered being beyond grateful for it, and for the help the older man had offered when his hands had been shaking too much to allow him to light it up.

He closed his eyes, to chase away those nightmarish thoughts that were still haunting him, almost twenty years later.

"Let's move and get over this. I need to meet with Gabriel at the Pub, afterward. He said he has something of urgency he needs to discuss with me," he murmured, trying to hide the strain in his voice with a small cough.

"Goddamnit, Em, don't tell me Gabriel’s still looking into that stupid cross he has found during Christmas,"

Uriel’s exasperated reaction caught him by surprise. Turning his complete attention to the younger sibling, Emmett raised an eyebrow.

“How do you know about it? Did Gabriel inform you?”

Uriel snorted, shaking his head. “As if! He didn’t need to! He mutters about it even in his sleep, for Christ’s sake! I’ve thrown him so many pillows to make him shut up, I was this close to tossing him out of the room! Ever since he came back from London last week, he’s started to talk to himself! ‘Leviathan this, Starrick that!’ I swear, if I hear about these poppycocks one more time, I’ll become a Templar myself and give Briel a real reason to brood over!”

Emmett’s face hardened in a mask of complete stillness at the mention of those names, his blood running cold deep within his veins.

The Leviathan. The connection to Crawford Starrick.

Gabriel must have found his correspondence.

Emmett took another drag from his cigarette, feigning nonchalance, despite the immense maelstrom of emotions whirling in his gut.

“Did he tell you anything of relevance?”

“Nothing whatsoever. The last time I saw him, he had closed himself in the library in Dover working on some codes. He looked like a madman because he couldn’t manage to decipher them,”

The eldest of the Frye brothers let out a shaky sigh of relief, that he immediately tried to hide with a small cough.

“And what are your thoughts on it?” he then asked, interrupting his younger brother’s harangue. ”Do you think we have reason to worry about anything he might find?”

Uriel dared to take his eyes off from the road for a little moment, just to give his brother a look of incredulity.

“Not you as well, Emmett! Come on, we all know they are a whole load of bollocks right there! Our father was an Assassin, the one leading our branch of the Brotherhood for the last three decades! What’s so surprising in finding a Templar memento in our home?” he huffed, as he honked to catch the attention of a friend passing down the road. Then, he focused once again on the road ahead of him. “I would’ve tossed that cross into the sea as soon as I first saw it and never thought about it ever again! I’d have just moved on and focused on something more urgent, instead of bringing Lily and Eva into this! Good thing he hasn’t bothered Robin as well, otherwise I would have smacked Gabriel myself! Who cares about it? Who fuckin’ cares about it all!? But no: leave it to Briel to make a giant fuss about philosophy, conspiracies and Templars and all that footle!”

Emmett remained silent. On one hand, he was relieved to know that his younger brother -always more focused on fighting and dallying around- wouldn’t give much attention to what Gabriel had found; On the other hand, the fact that Briel had entangled both their sisters in his conjectures made him wary and more nervous than he cared to admit.

He needed to meet him, as soon as possible, and assess how much he already knew, before he would turn to their parents - because Emmett knew that it would be his brother’s next step.

"You know how he is, Uri: when he finds something that he deems important, he is a hound that never quits," the eldest Frye murmured, at last, swallowing his worry as he kept his eyes on the road ahead of him. He heard his younger brother snort.

"That's one big bag of bullshit right there, Em, and you know that as well as I do. He quits when he sees fit to quit. He just loves to poke his nose in businesses that don’t concern him,"

Emmett allowed himself a small, sad smile. He knew the youngest one of the family had the reputation of being nosy, especially among his siblings, but Emmett knew better than the rest of them.

"He is driven by his need for the truth, whatever that might be. That in itself is not necessarily wrong. The only problem with Briel is that he does not know when to stop. And that can be dangerous." “dangerous for him and all of us,” he thought, without letting those words pass beyond his lips.

He brushed a thumb against his brow, before taking another drag from his cigarettes. When he spoke again, his tone was final. "Now, drive. I want to be over with all of this as soon as possible,”

*****

The snug room of the pub was quiet, intimate, entirely different from the joyful sound of laughter and chit-chat of the patrons enjoying their beers after the end of their shifts. Gabriel was sitting as still as his own will allowed, but impatience was eating him alive, as he looked at the timepiece in his hand.

He knew his eldest brother was always on time, precise and punctual to the point of being irritating, and always ready to call out others on their lateness.

So why, why was he late? Today of all days?

He tapped his foot impatiently against the golden leg of the table, fidgeting with his timepiece, as he took in his surroundings to distract his racing mind. He looked at all the carvings that ran around the edge of the table and without thinking, he caressed the intricate details, relishing in the smooth sensation of the lacquered wood against his fingertips.

His eyes followed the engraved vines until they found a detail he hadn’t seen in a long while: carved in one of the four corners of the table stood a small rook, holding a star underneath its wing and six smaller stars circling it.

The Rook, ever vigil, and the Morning Star, as splendent as ever and protected beneath the bird’s powerful wing, both surrounded by the glimmering six results of their love.

The Symbol of their Family.

A sad smile appeared on his face as he caressed it with gentleness: his father had designed and carved that small exquisite marvel, a token of love for his beloved wife and his children.

Gabriel felt a clenching in his chest, his shoulders slumping down at the memory of all that he had found after visiting his childhood home. All the doors that had opened, one after the other, in an uncontrollable cascade of discoveries that he had started, and had left him with more questions - and more regrets - than answers.

He knew his family was not perfect. He knew his parents were not without their faults, and he knew that they had lived full lives before he had been brought into that world by their love…but after finding the cross, the torn pages from his father’s journal, and those blasted letters under his brother’s wooden floor, he couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that his family was not what he had believed it to be. He looked at the box - another one of his findings- snuggly placed beside him on the wooden bench and frowned, half in guilt, half in disquiet, but whole in confusion. After all his findings, he felt as if he had turned all his carpets in his house, and found them hiding blood and dirt and worms, and he couldn’t, for the life of him wrap his head around it.

He wanted so desperately to understand, to be comforted, to be told that it had been all a humongous jest and that it shall carry no consequences whatsoever.

And yet, he knew, there was no possible way to undo what his curiosity had brought him to do.

There was no possibility to unknow what he had learned.

The sudden creaking of the room’s door opening brought Gabriel away from his mulling, and when he turned toward the newcomer, he narrowed his dark eyes.

“About time, Emmett,” he grumbled, tapping his foot against the wooden floor. He looked at his eldest brother from above his thin glasses and glared, unable to contain his disapproval.

“Have you been waiting long, little brother?”

“More than I wanted to. For being the one recommending us to never be late, you are not very good at doing as you preach,” Gabriel snarked, pursing his lips in a displeased grimace as he looked at his brother closing the door behind him, a lit cigarette already hanging from his lips.

Emmett smirked, amused.“I got caught up in something along the way. Duty called.”

Gabriel looked at his brother, examining his appearance with keen eyes. Smudged against his neck was the faint trace of lip rouge.

“Duty called alright”, he thought, scoffing.

Melanie Abberline, his paramour.

He said nothing, keeping his silent observation to himself; instead, he leaned over and took one of the cigarettes from his brother’s pocket, ignoring the raised eyebrows on his brother’s face.

“Does Mother know that you have picked up smoking?”

Gabriel didn’t answer right away, letting his defiant gaze speak for him as he lit up the cigarette.

“Does she know that you have been the one influencing me?”

Emmett smiled his sphynx grin, the one that never truly reached his clear eyes, as he finally sat directly in front of his younger brother.

“Your memory is failing, Briel, because I don’t recall ever giving you a cigarette in all my life. You were the one sneaking them out of my secret stashes, even when I changed their hiding place,”

Gabriel puffed out the smoke, squinting with a reproachful look.

“So you knew?”

Emmett smiled again. “I did, little brother. I always know what’s going on around me,”

“And yet, our siblings have the galls to call me nosy, when they have you who have more experience than me at it,” grumbled the younger Frye.

“In my defense, it is my job to know everything,” he said, letting out a raspy chuckle, before turning toward the barmaid. “Miranda, bring a Scotch for me and a Bitter for the bitter,”

Gabriel scoffed, rolling his eyes.

“Miss Stratton, make it three glasses of Scotch and a cup of rose tea, if you do not mind,” he intervened, staring straight into his oldest brother’s eyes as he did so, defiance in his tone.

When the barmaid went to do as she was told, Emmett turned to look toward his youngest sibling, his brows now slightly furrowed in a silent question.

"I was under the impression it would have been only the two of us, Briel,"

"Wasn't your job to know everything, oh brother of mine?" Gabriel sneered at him, as he took out his timepiece and looked into it.

“Almost time,” he thought. He quickly put out his half-finished cigarette in his pocket ashtray and raised to open the window, to let out the smoke.

Emmett cocked an eyebrow, confused. He could see how hard his younger sibling was trying to rein in his anger, how tense his shoulders were as he let the chilling wind enter, the flashes of disappointment and wrath that came from his eyes each time their gazes met. What did he find, that had rendered him so furious?

“What did you do this time, Gabriel?” he asked with a calm murmur.

“How does it feel to be the one not knowing what’s going on around you, Emmett? How does it feel, for once, to be the one kept in the dark?”

Emmett furrowed his eyebrows, uneasy at the younger man’s words, unable to read into his brother’s intention, in a moment that seemed infinite.

He didn’t like to be taken by surprise. Not even by his baby brother.

“Let’s get over with this whole farce, Briel. Uriel told me that you have been blabbering about Starrick, about the Leviathan. He told me you got Lily into this as well and told me you went to our old house and made a whole fuss about it all. So, pray tell, why did you call upon me?" Emmett said, letting his annoyance seep through his words just enough to warn Gabriel not to try his patience.

Gabriel's smirk turned into a grimace: he felt his heart hesitating for one single moment before the fury of the betrayal came back to him.

"If you know about that, then you know precisely why I called upon you. I need you to be completely honest with me, Emmett. Because now-” Gabriel dropped what he had found -the letters, the torn journal page - on the table. But before Emmett could even dare to pick them up and examine them himself, Gabriel also dropped the small box that had been sitting beside him all that time, with a loud bang against the surface of the table. “ Now I have proof that you, Mother, and Father have been lying to me - to all of us - all these years!”

Emmett opened it, his raised eyebrows the only readable reaction on his face, as he scoured the content of it all. Several letters were neatly stuck together and tied by a bow, another small leather-bound journal, a marriage certificate, and yet another daguerreotype.

The picture took him by surprise.

‘Damn,’ he thought, ‘He is a bloody hound. His time as an apprentice under Magnolia had given him more than just writing skills,’

"Now tell me, brother of mine: is this also a memory from Mother's past? Or is it from your past in the arts? Because I didn't know that you as well were an actor! “ Gabriel sneered. “Or perhaps, you are such an exceptional thespian that you have managed to deceive all of us with your pantomime, hiding from all of us that you were a Templar!"

Emmett didn’t answer right away, taking a drag from his cigarette, his face completely unfazed, careful not to show the turmoil that was hiding just beneath the surface.

The tips of his fingers touched the papers of the letters, and a corner of his mouth raised ever so slightly in a small melancholic smile, as he recognized the different calligraphies of the letters: the Leviathan’s, spidery, almost incomprehensible due the vernacular chosen; his mother’s, elegant and meticulous; his father’s, bold and clear…his grandfather’s, angular and ornate, almost ostentatious against the parchment. His eyes ran over the marriage certificate - beautifully decorated, with lilies and robins painted on it- and his eyes fell on the names written on it, and the date.

As he looked upon all of that, he understood what had caused Gabriel’s turmoil.

"I… can see why you need answers," he said with a cautious voice, weighting each word as it if was a grenade.

“And that’s all you have to say to me? ‘I can see why you need answers’?” Gabriel scoffed unable to stop himself from mocking his brother’s words. "I found your exchange with this… this “Leviathan”, written in a code that I couldn’t decipher! I found his Cross hiding in one of Mother’s boxes, a whole journal of yours dating back to 1886, and this wedding license that doesn’t make ANY sense at all. Dorothea Marianne Starrick?” he hissed, taking the piece of paper and tapping at it with harshness. “Starrick! As in, Starrick, the Grand Master of the British Rite in 1868! Our own mother, a bloody Templar! What else am I going to discover? That father was a Templar as well?”

Emmett looked at him in the eyes, steel grey meeting ebony, and for the first time in his life, he found himself at the loss of words.

"That, I can assure you, has never been the case. Father is and has always been an Assassin. He has always belonged to the Brotherhood, much like Aunt Evie and Uncle Henry," was all he could say, in a low cautious voice.

Gabriel gave him a skeptical look, unconvinced. How could he know that he was telling him the truth? For all he knew, there could be a whole vault hidden away somewhere with pieces of evidence that even his father was not who he told them to be.

That thought made his heart clench in his chest.

“And what about Mother then? What about you?" He continued, tossing the daguerreotype toward him. " What's next that I am going to find? That Queen Victoria is our grandmother? That Father almost disrupted our economy?” he hissed, his voice steadily growing more and more distressed with each word that came out of his mouth, spitting out one theory more improbable than the other. “What more will I find? What, Emmett? WHAT?”

Emmett stood silent, aggrieved by the pain he felt coming from his brother. He took the faded daguerreotype, and stared at it for a long moment: he looked at his younger self with pity and almost sadness for that tall, wide-eyed boy who had so many dreams and so many hopes, still so untouched by life. Physically, he hadn’t changed that much, despite the photo being over two decades old: his features had become sharper, the wrinkles at the corner of his eyes and on his brow not fading away even when his face was relaxed; the same, however, couldn’t be said about his heart. His lips thinned in a grimace, as he looked now at the other man in the picture standing at his side, whose prideful, unforgiving gaze he still felt burning upon himself, after all those years.

The Leviathan himself.

He looked back at his brother, studying his face, yet keeping his silence.

Gabriel felt himself growing more and more miffed with each passing moment.

“Why, Emmett? Why have I been fed lies all my life?” he finally hissed through gritted teeth, unable to bear the silence any longer.

The oldest Frye sibling took a shot at the whiskey, before refilling the glass again and gulping it down.

“Have you considered that there might be a reason if all of these has been buried away because the people involved did not want to see them ever again? That maybe -just maybe - these “so-called lies”, these secrets, are not yours to know? “

“But they are yours, now, aren’t they, Emmett?” Gabriel bellowed, jumping on his feet and slamming his hands on the table, now more incensed than ever. “Why did Mother and Father choose you and not any of us? What makes you so special that you were to partake in their secrets, while leaving us in complete darkness, believing something that is not true?”

“Because Emmett did not have a choice, Briel,” said a soft voice behind them.

Both brothers turned their heads toward the newcomer and found the steel gray eyes of their mother Dorothea staring at them, her face a mask of concern as she leaned on the cane she had been using for walking for the past five years.

Beside the petite woman, with his strong arm firmly wrapped around her waist to support her, was their father Jacob, his brow furrowed as he gazed toward his sons, his eyepatch always covering his left eye.

Emmett’s jaw clenched, mortified as he looked into his parents’ faces. He turned to look at his brother, his eyes flashing with anger as his lips pursed in a thin line. “You didn’t-”

“I did,” Gabriel answered, his gaze not faltering despite his brother’s piercing gaze, despite his own guilt at the sight of their mother's worried face and their father's severe stance.

“You had no right, Gabriel. No right at all!” Emmett spoke with a sharp tone. He had to call upon all his considerable self-discipline to not let out the rage he felt for his youngest sibling. Instead, he stood up, greeting his parents with a soft voice and motioning toward the barmaid to bring some pillows for the elderly woman.

“What is the meaning of all this, Gabriel?” asked Jacob with a stern tone, as he gestured toward the chaos of mementos laid on the table. “Why were you screaming at your brother?”

Gabriel, fueled as he was by his anger and doubts, driven by his own disappointment, didn’t answer immediately, nostrils flaring as he looked at both his parents with defiance and anger on his otherwise gentle features.

He saw his father turn to look at Emmett, a quizzical look painted in his eye a look answered by his brother’s sigh and saddened expression.

“He knows,” Emmett murmured to both his parents.

Two simple words.

It was all it took for them both to understand.

Gabriel felt his heart sink in his chest when he saw his mother’s sweet face blanching at those words and his father’s features morph into a mask of pain.

“Was it necessary, Gabriel?” Emmett said through clenched teeth, as he sat next to their mother, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

““I-I believe it is,” he said through gritted teeth, before turning to look at his parents, wriggling his hands under the table, his heart beating so fast, he was sure he would burst through his chest. ”I want an answer, Father…Mother. I- want the truth,”

He was afraid beyond words, terrified that all he had ever known was nothing more than smoke and mirrors. Facing his older brother was one thing; facing his mother and father was another one entirely.

When he saw that no one answered him, he felt his fury grow once more. He jumped on his feet, slamming his hands against the table.

“Now, young man-” Jacob started to reprimand his son for his behaviour, but Dorothea rested one hand on his shoulder stopping him.

“Let him speak, Jacob,” she murmured, her voice laced with guilt as her eyes never left her youngest son’s angered face.

“I cannot believe that all my life I have lived surrounded by liars! First, the letters, then the cross, then these pictures and the journal Emmett wrote in 1886? And this certificate of Marriage with this name?” he bellowed, turning to look at his mother, his frustration growing each passing moment. “You have always told us you were a Harrison by birth, Dorothea Marianne Harrison! Harrison! And now, instead, I have found proof that you are Dorothea Starrick, the only daughter of the Grand Master of the British Rite….our grandfather,” his voice turned low, as the reality of his words sank in. “Our own grandfather was a Templar. You were a Templar, the very same people that our father, Emmett, Lily, and Uriel have been hunting down all their lives! Or so I believed since it appears that even my own brother was inducted into the British Rite!” Gabriel looked at his mother, his piercing black eyes looking at her with barely contained disappointment.“ How can all of this be possible? How? Why?”

He felt his heart sitting on his stomach as he stared at her for a long moment, a desperate light in his eyes as he silently begged for all of this to be a misunderstanding. But his mother’s silence, her gentle face contrite in an expression of pure grief and heartbreak, was all he needed to know to confirm that all he had found - all the mementos - was the truth.

“I…I don’t even know who you are anymore,”

Emmett’s face hardened when he saw his mother lowering her gaze, shame painting on her face. He was about to reprimand his brother for his words, when he felt his mother’s gentle hand on his chest, stopping him before he had the chance to talk. He saw her looking at him, shaking her fair ringlets, her kind, understanding smile ruined by the tears that ran down her cheeks.

“No, my duckling. Briel is right. He-” she murmured with a heartbroken sigh. “He deserves to know the truth, if he wishes for it so ardently,”

She turned to look toward Gabriel, her gaze filled only with immense love for her youngest son: her bright, witty, splendid son, whose insatiable thirst for knowledge had always been his greatest virtue, one that she had always encouraged.

When she spoke again, Dorothea couldn’t stop the pride she felt for him from seeping into her voice, despite the pain laced in each word that left her lips.

“You know me, my love. I am still the same person you have known all your life. I am still the same person you always ran to when the storm outside scared you out of your wits; the same person you always ran to whenever you hurt yourself and needed a small kiss to steal the pain away; the same person you always came for counsel and help when writing those letters to brave Lancelot, to ask him when you could join the Knights of the Round Table-” she brought a small, trembling hand toward the pile of mementos in front of her, sighing. There was no way to run from her past. She closed her eyes for a moment, as a carousel of faces appeared in front of her: Byron, Phillip, Charles, Markus, Christopher, Ambrose, her mother Annette...her father Crawford, she thought with a pang of pain, seeing his loving gaze behind her closed eyelids. She took a deep breath, opening her eyes again.

“That cross you found-” she continued, “those pictures you found, my letters, my journal...they are just a part of who I am. They are a part of my life that I rather forget about, something that I have been. But They are not the only thing I am. They are not all that I am,”

Gabriel paused, a grimace appearing on his face, as he turned toward his father.

“I found a page of your journal too, Pa,” he murmured, taking it out of his pocket and passing it to his father, who took it carefully in his calloused hands, Without a word, Jacob opened it held it so that both he and his wife could read it together.

Gabriel stared intently, his keen eyes ready to catch any possible reaction from his parents’ faces. His father’s features were still, inscrutable, if not for the slight furrowing of his brow; but when his mother let out a choked “Oh, Jacob,” bringing a hand to her eyes, his father’s only reaction was to wrap his arm around his wife and bring her closer to him, kissing her on her brow and closing his eyes in a pained expression.

Gabriel’s heart clenched in his chest.

They didn’t need to speak any further.

The confirmation he needed was written all over their faces.

“Mother…how can I make my peace with this, if everything you are is all that Father has always warned us about? We have spent our entire lives hearing that the Templars are our enemies, that we are to protect this City of Light from them… from you!”

Dorothea was unable to contain a smile at those words; her grimace, however, was a sour one.

“Your grandsire used to refer to London as the City of Light. Your grandfather, my own father-”

“Crawford Starrick,” Gabriel finished her sentence for her, as he plopped on the chair behind himself.

He hoped he had been wrong. Hoped with all his heart.

But when he saw his mother nodding, he felt something inside himself break.

How big or small of a break, he didn’t know yet.

He took a few deep breaths, his eyes running all over the tables, unsure of what to do. When his mother wrapped her hand around his, gentle, soothing in her touch, he didn’t move his own away. He just paused, trying to find the courage that had abandoned him.

“Tell me-” he whispered in a small voice.“tell me this is all a misunderstanding. Please, mama,”

Dorothea saw his face turning pleading, with that same expression he always had as a child, whenever his insecurities would take over him and all he wanted, all he needed, was a word of comfort from his mother. Her heart clenched at that sight, feeling tears pooling in her eyes. She brought one hand to his cheek, caressing it with soothing tenderness as she drank from her youngest son’s sweet features, terrified as she was to lose the love he bore her.

“Briel, my child, my little angel…” she whispered with trembling voice.“ I wish I could do that. With all my heart, with all that I am, with all that I have, if I could tell you that nothing of this is true, I would do that, without even thinking about it twice. I wish- I wish I could say that all of this is just a lie, a mistake, a mystification…” she paused, her words choking in her throat. ” But I can’t. I am a Templar, my sweet child. I have been one since birth. My father and my mother were Templars too, and so they were their parents and their grandparents. It’s in our blood. It has been in our blood for generations, and that cannot be erased, no matter how much we try. But I swear to you, I only wanted the best for this city and for our family,”

“I-”

Gabriel turned to look at his father, and once more saw sadness in his hazel eye.

“Papa..you knew? You knew Mother was a Templar when you married her?”

Jacob turned to look at his wife, in a moment that seemed to last forever, his love for her so vivid in the way he looked at her, it was impossible not to notice. In a gesture of protection, he wrapped his big hand around hers and held it tight.

"I knew it," he said, his voice turning low but firm.

“And you knew who her father was?”

“Not immediately. But eventually.”

Gabriel let out a sigh, feeling himself deflecting like a hot air balloon. He didn’t know what he had hoped, asking his father that question. Maybe that only her mother was responsible for all that, that at least one of his parents hadn’t lied to him.

But now he knew that both of them had known.

“Then...why hide this from us? Why not tell us this from the very beginning?” He asked, in a feeble voice.

Dorothea lowered her head once more, closing her eyes as a traitor tear rolled down her cheek.

“Because what your grandsire had done, who I was, what I did-”

“ What we did, Goldilocks,” Jacob added, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. The woman took a deep breath, smiling at her husband for his support. Even after more than forty years spent together, she still thanked the heavens each night for putting him on her path.

“-What your father and I did,” she continued, trying to drown the pain that she felt bubbling just beneath the surface. “...our actions almost cost us our family. What we did almost cost us everything. And I couldn’t bear-” her voice choked in her throat. “I couldn’t bear to think that my mistakes, who I was, could hurt any of you in any way ever again,”

But before she could continue, she felt her own heart shatter once more at all the memories that still lived within her soul, as she saw them cornering her like wolves after their prey, growling, baring their teeth at her.

Gabriel pursed his lips, taking another deep breath, and offering his mother his own handkerchief to dab away her tears, before speaking once again.

“Then, if you love me, if you truly love me, Mama, please, tell me. Tell me everything. I want to know. I have the right to know who you are. I have the right to know if the woman I have loved all my life is someone else entirely,”

Dorothea sighed, looking into her husband’s eyes to find the courage she needed to dive once more into those dark, cold waters she thought she had long left behind herself, hoping, praying with all that she was she would not lose her child's love after he had heard their whole story.

“Very well, Briel. I shall give you all the truth. I shall spare you no detail, I swear it on my life and honour. Are you willing to listen to all of it, with an open heart?”

“I-” Gabriel faltered, swallowing hard. Pandora’s Box all over again. And his mother was offering it to him. He took a deep breath, squaring his shoulders. “I am. I want to know everything. I am ready,”

Dorothea nodded, her expression turning solemn.

The waters were churning beneath her, calling her like syrens, reclaiming her, ready to swallow her whole. With one last deep breath, she closed her eyes, plunging into the ocean of memories head first.

“We need to go back to 1868, then. The year I came back to London to officially become a Templar. The year my whole life changed forever,” she turned to look at her husband, her Jacob, to find the courage in his comforting gaze. For a moment, she didn’t see his candid hair and beard, nor the eyepatch covering his eye, nor the wrinkles that graced his face; for a moment, she saw his twinkling eyes -both sane and as beautiful as they had always been- his dark, unruly hair and that mischievous grin that still sometimes appeared on his lips. She saw him as he was when he stole her heart.“We need to go back to the year I met your father,”

[PREVIOUS CHAPTER - Echoes of The Past]

[NEXT CHAPTER - "Homeward Bound" ]

and I am officially here, presenting you the third chapter of my story!! view, that was a JOURNEY right there!!!

Be ready to say your goodbye to sweet Emmett and Gabriel, for we are heading to 1868 in the next chapter! WOHOOO!! Lots of new characters arriving, and I cannot wait to dive into the next chapters!!

Not gonna lie, I will miss my Starrick-Frye babies, but this isn't going to be the last time you will hear from them!!

Once more, huge huge HUGE THANKS to all my friends for supporting me and for believing in me and in my story, for encouraging me to keep on writing. I love you all so much, THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU HAVE DONE FOR ME.

Melanie Abberline and Magnolia Benson belong to my dear buddy @thatcrazycrowgirl , who was so gracious as to lend them to me for my story (ngl, Melanie and Emmett are kinda my OTP when it comes to the Starrick-Frye children, so I was SUPER HAPPY when she allowed me to insert her in my story! thank you, girl!)

well, UNTIL NEXT TIME!!

--Nemo

#Assassin's Creed #Assassin's Creed Syndicate #ac syndicate #Jacob Frye #Dorothea Starrick #Jottie #my ocs #Emmett Starrick-Frye #Gabriel Starrick-Frye #my writings #In The Heat Of The Moment #Nemo Writes #ocfairygodmother #ocappreciation

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yootaesowlwrites · 3 years

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A/N: This is the first time I’ve tried to write a slow burn fic/imagine, I’ll admit, it wasn’t the easiest things to do, it took me weeks/months to do, find the right balance, but I’m hoping I didn’t do too bad, but it’s trying that counts! I started working on this in January, researching about how to do a slow burn, in the end, I followed my gut, BUT I am also sorry it took so long for me to finish it, but It’s here. AND YES, the goat and doggies have names!

I once again tried my best here with 2nd POV, and hopefully it doesn’t look too bad.

Happy Birthday @taeandpuppies !!! IF anyone wants to make the day unpleasant, let me know, I’ll use my big hammer on them.

Tropes: Strangers To Lovers, Boss/Employee, Stableman!Taehyung AU.

Warnings: Slow burn?, mutual pining?, fluff, smut, mention of medication, descriptive sex scenes, sex in a stable, nudism, protected sex (ALWAYS be protected), nudism, fingering, oral (male receiving), cum tasting, explicit language, size kink?, praising?, dirty talking, begging if you squint, slight aftercare, the tiniest bit of angst if you squint hard enough, soft sex in the meadow, unprotected sex, clit stimulation, Cowgirl position, Missionary position, Lotus position.

Age warnings: No one will listen to this, but it’s here, I will not take responsibility because you wanted to read this, but if you’re under the age of 18+, DO NOT INTERACT OR READ. Even though you will ignore this warning and still read it, so do not take this as educational, this is fiction!

W/C: 26.4K (THE LONGEST I HAVE EVER MADE AND I FEEL PROUD OF THIS NUMBER)

“I don’t need any help on my farm, I’m completely fine on my own.” You say to your brother over the phone, it was on speakerphone while you were moving between the closest and your suitcase, packing for a six-day business trip, you had asked him if he could keep an eye on your farm while you would be away, but you should have known that he would bring up the subject of getting some help on the farm again, something you were not keen about.

You had been managing without any help for years, well… maybe you did have some help, but it was mostly from willing family members or friends, not a full-time worker that would be living with you on the farm and help you take care of all of your beloved animals, you hadn’t even thought about getting one, but each time you had to leave for a business trip, you would mostly ask your brother for some help and each time you ask him, he would then bring it up.

“I don’t need anyone, I’ve been coping well on my own, and besides, it’s not like I’m away for weeks or each month.” You say while folding a shirt, you attended certain meetings every few months to learn and hear about new products on the market and if they could be useful on the farm, and during those trips, you would usually rely on your brother to keep an eye on things, and each time you asked, he would mention getting help, ‘doesn’t he want to be a helpful brother?’ You thought to yourself.

“But it would be easier if you did have a helping hand on the farm.” He says, you let out a sigh as you put the shirt you were folding into the suitcase.

“I am fine on my own.” You say. “Besides, where am I supposed to find the time to look for somebody that would be up for the task and would do a proper job instead of slacking off, oh and not to mention, someone trustworthy.” You pick your phone up from where it laid on the bed next to your suitcase. “Will you keep an eye on things here or should I ask someone else?” You were becoming impatient with him and his repeated question.

“No, no, I’ll keep an eye on things, don’t worry.” He quickly says. “You can count on me to keep an eye on things.”

“Thank you.” You say. “I’ll see you tonight when you come and pick me up.” You waited for him to argue, he would usually argue against it at first, but then agree to take you to the airport.

“See you then, bye.” He says, this surprised you, you had prepared yourself for the argument.

“Okay… bye.” You say as you end the call, you drop your phone back onto the bed before slowly continuing to pack. “What is he…” You trail off as you think for a moment. “He wouldn’t… I wonder if something’s wrong.” You shake your head. “No… he would say something.” You pause in your spot. “And who does he think he is suggesting getting help, he’s lost it if he thinks I’m going to get help!” You look at your dogs lying on your bed near the pillows. “What’s wrong with him?” They only responded with a wag of their tails.

That was seven days ago, you now stood next to your brother, [Y/b/n], staring at the man across from you, his dark brown eyes stared back at you, his dark hair was slightly damp and covered his forehead as the sunlight shone down on it, his honey toned skin was coated with a barely noticeable layer of sweat along with dirt from the stables, you were certain that you had told your brother that you didn’t need any help, yet, here stood a stranger in front of you, and he had clearly been working on your farm for a few days now, you slowly turn your head to look up at your brother’s taller form, several questions ran through your mind, your eyes displayed the number of questions you wanted to ask him, but you didn’t want to do it in front of the man your brother had obviously hired without your permission, and without consulting you first, not that you would have agreed if he did, you turn your gaze back to the man standing across from you.

“[Y/n], this is Kim Taehyung, he will be helping you around the farm.” Your brother says with a proud smile as if he had something to feel proud about after what he had done, your eyes flicker towards your brother momentarily before you turned your full focus to the man named Taehyung, a string of curse words ran through your mind, and you would definitely say them out loud later when you would be alone with your brother, ‘how could he do this to me?!’ You thought, your eyes slowly move over Taehyung, taking in his features, his length, divinity he seemed unreal, it was hard to explain how beautiful he looked. “Oh, and don’t worry, I looked at his qualifications, and he’s more than qualified for the job, and he adores horses also.” You wanted to grab your brother by his neck and strangle him right then and there, it took a lot of restrain for you not to do it, there would be a time and a place for that later, right now, you needed to focus on the stranger that would be working with you on your farm, Taehyung extends his arm and holds his hand out for you to shake.

“It will be a pleasure working for you and with you,” Taehyung says, your knees felt like they wanted to buckle underneath you, his voice was deep yet smooth when he spoke, you take hold of his hand, trying your best to hide the effects his voice had on you, your eyes move down to his hand as you take hold of it and notices how well they were built, or sculpted, they must have been sculpted by the Greek gods, he bows his head as you shake hands. “What should I call you?”

“Ah, you—“ Your brother begins to say only for you to quickly cut him off before he could finish his sentence, he had done enough, and you could speak for yourself from now on.

“You can call me by my name.” You say, your brother looks at you with his mouth still agape. “[Y/n].” Taehyung nods his head as a smile grows on his lips, ‘Dear goddesses… how do you want me to survive?’

“Well, [Y/n], you can call me Tae or Taehyung.” He says, you nod your head as your lips slightly part.

“Okay.” Your brother says loudly and claps his hands together making you and Taehyung look at him and release each other’s hands. “Then this is settled, I’ll see you when I see you.” He quickly flees towards his car, you look at him wide-eyed before running after him. “I’ll call you later!” He reaches for his car and opens the door.

“You absolute— How could you do this?!” You ask as you watch him quickly climb into his car. “I told you, over and over again!” He closes the door and rolls down the window after starting the engine.

“I know, I know, but you need help!” He says. “You have to admit that you need help, you can’t try and do this on your own, even if it’s just one other person that can help you.” You place your palms against the car door and look at him through the window. “This is a good thing, you can come and go as you please, you can trust him.” Your glare hardens at his words. “Trust me then, you know you need help, you’re just too stubborn to admit it right now.” You let out a sigh.

“One month, [Y/b/n].” You sigh out. “One month only and if I’m not satisfied with his work, you are going to come down here and tell him that it’s not working out, got it?” He nods his head as his smile widens.

“You’ll see, you won’t regret it, you only need one month to see how much easier things will be.” He says. “You’ll see how much easier it will be with help.” You take a step away from the car. “Oh, and he’s staying in that small cottage.” Your eyes slightly widen, the cottage hadn’t been used since Christmas, it was only used when your family came to visit for the holidays and sometimes the main house became too crowded, so you had built a cottage to escape to when things became too much in the house, and now Taehyung was staying in it, not that, that was the problem, the problem was that the cottage was located close to the main house, and you could look straight into the kitchen if the curtains were left open, you would have to be extra cautious from now on and make sure that they were closed, to prevent any kind of accidents. “I’ll call you later, bye.” Before you could say anything else, he drove off.

“I can’t believe him…” You mutter to yourself as you watch his car disappear into the distance, you bring your hand to your forehead and rub your temple as you take in a deep breath, you drop your hand to your side and shake your head as you turn around and make your way to the stable, you hadn’t seen your horses in almost seven days, and you needed to make sure that they were all still in good shape and doing well, as you enter the stables you spot Taehyung brushing one of the horses, your eyes immediately move to his arm muscles as they flex with each brush along the horse’s side.

“It seems like your brother didn’t tell you about hiring me.” He says once he spots you standing by the stable entrance, your eyes move away from his arm and settles on his face, ‘oh… his face…’ You thought. “You looked stunned when you saw me.” You harshly exhale through your nose before moving towards him and the horse he was tending to.

“I’ll admit, it was definitely a surprise when I saw you.” You say. “My brother has a tendency to ignore what I tell him.” He softly smiles at you, a smile that could melt anyone’s heart. “But it wasn’t a bad surprise entirely.” His smile slightly widens before he turns his head away from you, you stop in front of the horse and lifts your hand up to its forehead and begins stroking it.

“I hope I can provide some help to you.” He says as he turns to look at you again. “Help care for them.” You gently stroke along the horses face before moving your hand to its neck, your eyes meet Taehyung’s. “You have some beautiful horses, all of them— even the ponies— look so beautiful and strong.” You gently smile at him, at the compliments about your animals. “I look forward to helping you with them, they’re such magnificent creatures.”

“They really are magnificent.” You say with a big smile on your lips, just hearing how he thought and spoke about horses confirmed that he liked them and would at least help you care for them. “How long have you been working with horses?” You step away from the horse and move towards one of the stalls to greet another horse.

“A little over six years now.” He says. “But this is my first job since I decided to learn more about them.” You nod your head while listening to him intently. “I always loved and adored horses, so I always knew that I’d end up working with them in some kind of way.” You move towards another stall that had a pony inside. “How long have you been working with them?” You smile as you begin to rake through your brain, trying to remember when you had started working with them.

“It’s been years, I’ve lost track of how long it’s been, but it’s been over a decade.” You answer. “I’ve lived here since I was a child and took over about ten, eleven years ago, and then about five years ago I was the only one that stayed on the farm.” He nods his head as he stops brushing the horse. “We’ve always worked with horses, but two years ago I decided to get some ponies also.” His smile widens as the seconds pass, just hearing the passion in your voice, how passionate you are about your farm. “People bring their horses here if they can no longer care for them, or if they need help training them, or to buy one.” He puts the brush down and guides the horse back into its stall. “I don’t easily sell them, but if I do sell, I usually make sure that they will be going to a good and proper home, where they will be cared for.”

 “Proper homes are hard to find.” He says. “So thank the gods for people like you that still care about the animal’s wellbeing.” You gently smile at him, at his words, before you could say or add anything else, your dogs along with a Pomeranian ran into the stables and towards you, you bend down and pat their heads as they wag their tails at you.

“Hey guys, I missed you too.” You say in a soft tone, you glance at the Pomeranian as he stood by Taehyung’s feet before running towards you, you reach out and allow him to sniff your hand before gently patting his head as well.

“Oh, that’s my boy, Yeontan, but I call him Tan.” He says, you nod your head and glance up at him.

“He’s really fluffy and soft.” You say before standing upright. “I see that they’re getting along also, so that’s good then.” You look between the dogs, watching them sniff each other’s butts. “And by that I mean, it’s good that they became friends so quickly.” He nods his head, smiling while looking at his dog.

“I was a little worried at first, but it seems like they don’t really mind being in each other’s company.” He says, you nod your head and watch them as they begin sniffing around the stables.

“As long as they’re getting along then I absolutely don’t mind the cute little guy.” You say before your mind trails to your sunshine probably waiting for you. “Speaking of cute.” You mutter to yourself. “I should go greet that sunshine.” You begin making your way out of the stables before stopping and turning around to look at Taehyung, he pulls the door of the stall close and locks it. “Have you met the life of the farm yet?” Taehyung’s brows furrow as he looks at you confused.

“That depends on who that would be.” He says, you nod your head to your side, signalling for him to follow you, he quickly follows you out of the stable. “Sunshine and life of the farm?”

“Yes.” You say. “His real name isn’t sunshine, it’s waffles, but I like calling him sunshine because he’s just a bundle of sunshine and joy.” The three dogs run out ahead of you, knowing where you were going. “Where are you from, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“Daegu, but when I was a small child we moved to Geochang where I spent most of my life and time growing up and learning about those beautiful free-spirited animals.” He says. “The first thing I learned was how stubborn they can be.” You nod your head with a slight chuckle, it was true, they could be stubborn as hell when they wanted to be. “I don’t exactly remember how old I was, but horses seem to be my earliest memory from my childhood.” You couldn’t help but giggle a little.

“You don’t have to remember every detail.” You say. “I’m not trying to figure how you were born, but it’s nice to know that you were surrounded by them, it means you’re probably attached to them just like I am, it also means that you learned a lot more than any school could ever teach you because you had first-hand experience.” He nods his head as a boxy smile appears on his face, you could feel your heart melting at the sight of that smile, you could tell he felt a bit shy. “But if you remember anything that you want to share, I’d love to hear about it.” And you meant it, if you were going to get to allow him to work on your farm, you had to get to know each other and be comfortable with each other and in each other’s presence.

“I’ll gladly tell you more one day when we have more time.” He says, a pen with a small brick building came into sight, you had built it for waffles for the colder nights and the wet days, you always felt so bad if it rained or snowed, and he was outside in it while you along with Terry and Pizzie were in the comfort of your warm dry house. “Wait… is that a…?” He begins as he spots Waffles, you nod your head with a proud smile on your lips, the three dogs had run around the pen and had caught Waffles’s attention.

“Yes, that’s my other little baby boy.” You say, you bring your hands together clapping them together which caused Waffles to look towards the gate where you and Taehyung now stood and waited for him, Waffles runs towards the gate while letting out a loud ‘maaa’. “You miss me when I don’t come to visit you for a few days but ignore me when I’m here every day.” Taehyung watches you as you interact with the small energetic animal, rubbing his head and patting his back. “Do you want to pet him?”

“Can I?” He asks, unsure if he was allowed to touch Waffles or not, you nod your head causing some strands of hair to fall in front of your eyes.

“Of course, he loves attention.” You say, he smiles and reaches over the gate and gently slides his hand along Waffles’s fur, you watch as his hand gently pats down the hair while you stroke Waffles’s head. “I can see why you call him sunshine and Waffles, he looks like a bundle of brightness.” Waffles walks away from the gate and begin sniffing around before a burst of energy caused him to jump around. “Oh, definitely a bundle of sunshine right there.” You watch as he stares at Waffles with adoration in his eyes, you could practically see his eyes lighting up. “He’s got a nice spacious home also.”

“He has a lot of energy, so he needs tons of space to run, hop and play around, that’s why he has a playground also.” You say and point to the large play-set on the other side of the pen. “I should go check up on his food.”

“Ah, I should get back to the horses.” He says. “Thank you for introducing me to Waffles.”

“If you’re going to be working here, you should at least know everyone on this farm.” You say making him softly chuckle and smile, his lips once again forming that boxy smile from earlier, you practically feel your heart skipping a beat seeing it again. “I will see you either tomorrow or later.”

“Have a good day and night, [Y/n].” He says before turning around and making his way back to the stable, you open the gate and step inside and turns around to close it, you look up as you lock it to be sure Waffles doesn’t escape and saw a gentle breeze blowing Taehyung’s hair to the side, you watch as he lifts his hand and pushes them out of the way, dishevelling it as he runs his hand through them, you shake your head and turn away.

“No, no…” You mumble to yourself. “He works for you… you are his boss, it can’t…” You make your way to the tiny brick building and step inside you, you had the feeder inside the building to avoid needing to throw away food when it rained and snowed, you see that it was halfway and made a mental note to return tomorrow with food to fill it, you step out of the small building and made your way back to the gate to leave, your mind continued to wander back to Taehyung, the way his dark eyes would light up, how his muscles flexed underneath his button-up shirt when he would brush a horse or pet Waffles, his smile… the different types of smile you had already seen today, the gentle soft smile and then the cute box-like smile, and then his sweat-covered honey skin. “Snap out of it!” You exit the pen and lock the gate before making your way to your house, you had an entire list of things to write down that you had to do and get and have delivered to the farm, but as you sat in your home-office trying to focus on your work, keyword, trying, but your mind kept drifting off to the honeyed skin dark-eyed beauty inside your stable working with your horses, and now living with you on your farm.

“Dammit, why did he think I needed help!?” You suddenly say and kick a box filled with papers, you toss your pencil onto the table. “And why him?” You look out the window. “Him of all people?” Your eyes catch a glimpse of the man that was invading your thoughts and distracting you from your work. “He’s so good-looking…” You look away from the window and grab your phone. “That’s it, [Y/b/n] is gonna get a piece of my mind!”

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You look at yourself in the mirror as you remember that you were no longer alone on your farm anymore, it would be the first morning that you would be greeting Taehyung, which made you wonder, was he already awake? Was he already in the stables? You move away from your bathroom mirror and exit the bathroom and pick up your jacket, you slip into it as you make your way to the front door, you open the door allowing Terry and Pizzie to run out ahead before you stepped outside and made your way to the stable, you stop in your tracks when you see Taehyung already there brushing one of the ponies, you clear your throat, mentally preparing yourself for the day.

“Good morning.” You greet him as you make your way to one of the stalls and opened the door, you step inside and lead the horse out of it.

“Good morning, [Y/n].” He greets you with a smile on his lips, you glance in his direction and return the smile, he had such a sweet smile, one that you could just stare at all day, it was one captivating smile, and you almost felt blessed just being able to see it in person.

“Did you manage to sleep well?” You ask as you guide the horse towards a wide space to brush him.

“Oh, yes, yes, I slept good, thank you for asking, how about you, did you sleep well?” He asks, you nod your head as you pick up a brush.

“I did, thank you for asking.” You say and glance at the pony he was brushing. “Have you ever rode a horse before?” You begin brushing along the horse’s hair while glancing between the horse and Taehyung, waiting for his answer.

“Only a few times, not a much, or at all in recent years.” He says, you nod your head and put the brush down, deciding that you wanted to see him ride.

“Do you want to go for a ride?” You ask, you would finish brushing the horse later if he agreed to go on a ride.

“Can we?” He asked as his face lights up like a kid’s on Christmas Eve that got the toy he wished for, you nod your head and walk towards a small shed that was inside the tables, you open the door and step inside.

“Come and get yourself a saddle and bridle!” You call out while picking up a saddle and placed a bridle on top of the saddle, he puts the brush down and walks towards the small shed, he enters it as you exit it and picks out a saddle and bridle to use, he exits the small shed carrying the needed equipment, you lead the pony back into its stall and open another stall. “Take him.” He puts the equipment down and went to the stall, he leads the horse out and towards him the equipment and begins preparing the horse, it took only a couple of minutes to prepare the two horses and lead them out of the stable, you watch as he climbed onto the horse. “Did you learn on your own or did someone teach you?” You had to ask after seeing how his feet were positioned.

“Someone taught me.” He says as he shifts his weight to the centre, you guide your horse to a tree and tie the reins around a branch. “Why, what's wrong?” He watched as you approached him with a frown on your face.

“Your feet are positioned wrong, you’re going to get injured like this.” You say as you place your hand around his ankle, you take your other hand and place it on underneath his shoe and lifts the front of his foot up. “Your heels need to be down to avoid injury.” You release his ankle and look up at him.

“Oh…” He quietly says before pushing his heel down on his other foot. “I uh, I didn’t know that they didn’t teach me that when I was learning.”

“Who taught you?” You ask, your face almost emotionless, but inside you were boiling, how could a trainer not teach this to anyone? How irresponsible were they? “Because it’s one of the most important things you have to know, along with keeping your shoulders back, and arms in a soft bent position when you hold the reins.”

“Uh, I can’t remember who taught me.” He says. “But I’m starting to think that I should have met you sooner, you would have taught me properly.” He gently smiles down at you. “Anything else I should be aware of?” You softly smile up at him.

“We’ll go now, slowly, I’ll evaluate you as we’re riding, and I’ll let you know if there’s something else.” You say. “I wouldn’t want you to get hurt while working here.” He nods his head and watches you return to your horse, you untie the reigns and climbs onto the horse, making sure to push your heels down, you turn the reins and click your tongue, urging your horse to move which also caused the horse Taehyung was riding to move, you guide your horse out of the stable area and onto a road that would lead you to explore your farm. “I think we’ll just go on a stroll today, gallop another day, besides…” You look at him, picking up on how focused he was on keeping his hands and heels in the correct position. “There’s no rush.”

Throughout the ride you kept an eye on his heels, quick to remind him about pushing them down and keeping them down when you saw his heels were no longer pushed down, you didn’t blame him for forgetting, over the years something can become a habit, and it would take time to break that habit and learn to something another way, you also got to know more about each other, like how he had come to love horses, who had raised him and what he wanted to be if he wasn’t working with horses, by the time you were on your way back to the stables it was late in the afternoon and the sun was starting to go down, but your mind was set at ease, you got to know him a little more and your worries became less as you started to slowly trust him, you arrive back at the stables and dismount your horse and lead him into the stable with Taehyung not far behind with the other horse, you unstrap the saddle and remove the bridle and took it into the small shed, making a mental note to clean it later.

“I’ll clean them later, so you can just put them in there for now.” You say as you saw Taehyung remove the bridle. “Let me show you where I wash and cool them down after a long ride.” He quickly takes the equipment to the shed before exiting and following you to the other side of the stable.

“How often do you ride?” He asks, surely you must ride a lot, you took care of them and trained them, you probably enjoyed just saddling one up and going for a ride around your farm.

“As often as I can.” You say. “Which is not a lot these days, but when I have a moment to myself, I usually go for a ride.” He nods his head. “So uh, this is a nice open spot because the food is also close if they want to eat.” You show him the clear spot where a large bucket was that you usually filled with food to keep the horses busy while you washed them. “And fill this with water for them to drink.” He nods his head, listening closely to your instructions. “Some of them will become impatient and restless, it depends on their mood on that day, if that’s the case, take them back to their stall and let me know, I’ll go tire them out or if you want to learn or do it yourself, just let me know, and I’ll show you what to do.”

“Would you show me how to do it one day?” He asks with excitement in tone, eagerness clear in his body language.

“Sure, the pen is right outside that door over there.” You say and point to another door. “I usually take them there and tire them out, or to train them.” You could see his eyes lighting up as a smile forms on his lips, you could tell that he was curious.

“Thank you.” He says and slightly bows his head. “I’ll wash those two and brush the others tomorrow.” You brightly smile at him, showing some of your teeth as you smiled.

“Don’t worry, I’ll help, I’m not going to be one of those bosses that sit back and watch their employees.” You say. “I just need to go feed Waffles, and then I’ll be back to help you with them.” He nods his head as you both walk into the direction where you had left the horses, you exit the stables while he guides the horses to the watering hose to wash them, you make your way to the large storage building where you stored all the food and medication for your animals, you enter the building and grab the bag filled with Waffles’s food and made your way to the pen where he lived, you enter the pen, closing the gate behind you as he ran towards you with a loud ‘maaa’, you giggle as you make your way to the small building where you kept the food and where he slept or stayed during colder days, Waffles hops next to you as you approach his home.

“You’re so cheerful.” You say as you step into the small building, you open the bag and fills his food supply. “Here you go, sunshine.” You put the half-emptied bag on the ground and gently pats his head. “You know the man that you met yesterday… well, he doesn’t seem that bad.” You pick up the bag. “Well, I should go help him, I’ll stop by again later.”

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“Good morning, Taehyung.” You greet him as you step into the stable, Taehyung was busy filing the water in each stall when you arrived. “There are some delivery trucks coming today.” He nods his head as he glances away from the water bowls he was filling. “I’ll be showing you where everything is stored and where they should unpack everything for the times I’m not here.” He moves towards the tap and closes it before removing the watering hose from the stall.

“Good morning, [Y/n].” He greets you as he neatly places the hose against the wall. “Are you planning on going anywhere anytime soon?” He looks at you while running his fingers through his hair, pushing them back only for them to fall back into place, with a few pieces of hair sticking up, your mind drifts for a moment, wondering how he would look with your hand running through it, you shook your head, he was your employee, you were his boss, you couldn’t have those thoughts about him, you barely even knew him.

“Not anytime soon, but I will in a few months once again go on another trip.” You say. “But maybe this time I don’t have to delay my deliveries if you’re here to help.” He had no idea about the one-month deal you had made with your brother, and you saw no reason to tell him about it, only a few days had passed, and you had felt the load being lifted from your shoulders in those few days. “They usually arrive just before eleven, so let me go show you the storage building, although, I’m positive you probably already saw it, right?”

“I have, but not the inside, and I assume that they’re also delivering some medicine and cleaning products, right?” He asks as he approaches you, he stops in front of you with a soft smile on his lips, you slowly nod your head as you glance at his lips before looking up into his brown eyes, those dark brown eyes that had a golden glow when the rays of the sun would hit them.

“Yes, you’re right.” You say. “You will have to know where they’re kept also in case I’m not home and there’s an emergency, I can only assume my brother showed you those kept in that little shed where the equipment is kept, right?” You nodded your head to the shed you were referring to.

“Yes.” He says, you nod your head and turn.

“Come, let me go show you.” You say as you exit the stable with him not far behind you, his long legs quickly caught up with you and walked next next to you. “A veterinarian and her team will also be coming next week to give a check-up on all the animals and make sure that they’re all still healthy and in good shape.” You glance at him and caught him already looking at you. “Again, I’m hoping the if there comes a time when I’m not here, that you could guide them around and help them when they need it.” He nods his head as you approach the storage building.

“That’s why I’m here.” He says. “To lift some of that weight from your shoulders, and make it easier for you.” You stop in front of the door and turn to look at him, giving him a warm smile. “And make your life easier for when you’re not here.”

“And I’m glad about that, I already feel that a lot has been lifted from my shoulders since you started.” You say as you pull the lock open of the storage door. “Thank you.” You walk inside and lead him to the back of the storage.

“I’m glad to hear that I’ve been able to do that.” He says, you lead him to the large walk-in fridge and opens the door.

“Don’t let this door shut on you, if it does, make sure you have your phone with you to call for help.” You say as you place two bricks in front of it to keep it from shutting. “Always put something in front of it to keep it open.” He nods his head and follows you inside. “This is where most of the medication is kept, you will see which one belongs here and which ones are outside, you saw the large closest-like thing just outside right?” He nods his head. “Okay, that is where the other medicine is kept, such as pills, eye drops or sprays.” You point to the back of the fridge. “Some cleaning products are also in here, which is kept over there.” You look at him. “I keep them away from all the medicine so I don’t end up accidentally grabbing the wrong thing if I’m in a hurry when it’s an emergency.” You place your hand on one of the shelves. “These are for when one of them is giving birth, and you see a problem or something that could cause or become a problem.” He nods his head before looking over all the products, as a child, he had seen most of the things and as he grew older he learned what most of them did and what they were used for. “If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask, all right?”

“I will.” He says as you step out of the fridge, you close the door once he was out of the fridge. “But you’ll be here if one of them is close to giving birth, right?” He had seen it before his teenage years, but he was too young to understand what he had to do during that time, even though he had learned about it, he would feel more comfortable if he had a helping hand for the first few times.

“Of course, don’t stress about that.” You say and turn towards him. “So, uh, we might not have a lot of time after the delivery trucks leave, but I would like to show you around the farm some more tomorrow if you’re up for another ride?” A wider smile appears on his lips as he nods his head, his hair bouncing as he did.

“Yes, I definitely want to see more of it, the parts I saw the other day looked so beautiful.” He says.

“Then we’ll go tomorrow morning early, then I can show you where the horses spend their time during the summer.” You say as you exit the storage building, you close and lock the door once Taehyung had stepped out of the building. “And where you can go search if one of them were to escape because that does sometimes happen.”

━━━━━━♡♥♡━━━━━━

The sun was already high in the sky beating down on earth when you and Taehyung exit the stables with two horses saddled up and ready to be taken out for a ride, you glance at Taehyung and saw that he had his heels pushed down as you guide the horses down the road.

“How did you sleep last night?” You ask as the horses walk side by side as the day slowly begins ticking by. “I know I always have trouble sleeping when I’m in a new place, and I realized last night that I never asked if you were comfortable in the cottage yet.”

“Oh, I slept good, and you don’t need to worry about that.” He says. “I’m not like that, I can fall asleep almost everywhere comfortably as long as I’m holding something in my arms, like a bunch of pillows.” You nod your head. “Is there a reason why you can’t fall asleep in a new place?”

“It’s usually the unfamiliarity and without Terry and Pizzie there to comfort me or lay with me on the bed, it just feels empty and lonely.” You say as you glance at him, you were moving at a slow pace enjoying the morning along with the soft gentle breeze blowing, the autumn morning making the day look even more beautiful, winter was drawing closer and closer it could be felt in the air as it got colder each day and night. “Terry and Pizzie keep me company at night, and it doesn’t feel the same without them.” He nods his head, understanding what you meant.

“It doesn’t feel like home without them, does it?” He asks, you nod your head. “I understand that, sometimes when Yeontan isn’t with me, which is rare, I don’t feel too comfortable, so I think that’s why I’m comfortable in the cottage, he’s here with me, but if he’s not with me, I still fall asleep easily because the faster I go to sleep, the faster I’ll be able to see him again.”

“That’s another way to see it.” You say as you guide your horse down a road that was next to a wide-open field with a fence surrounding it. “But sometimes the days are too long.” He nods his head, agreeing with you. “But, uh, anyway, uh, this is where I usually bring the horses and ponies to roam freely when it’s summer and when the stables become too hot for them to stay in.” Taehyung turns his head to look at the open field, it was usually covered with fresh green grass but since autumn had settled in it had died and become a brown colour.

“It looks so spacious.” He says as he turns his head to look at you. “I bet it looks unreal during the summer months.” The horses slowly walk past the area, the sound of their hooves clicking loudly on the ground.

“It’s absolutely unreal, it takes your breath away during the summer.” You say. “They’re so free when I bring them to this spot, you could just watch them roam, run and play around this area for hours and hours without getting bored or tired of watching it.” You gently smile as you thought about the past summer when they were running around. “You should experience it for yourself.” You pull on the reins as another road approaches. “Turn here.” The horses move down that road as you and Taehyung steer them in the direction.

“I can’t wait to experience it.” He says and looks around the road you were following. “This place is big, or it seems big.” He fixes his gaze on you.

“It is big, but also not as big as you think.” You say. “There are bigger farms in the area, compared to them, mine is much smaller.” The horses approach a lake that was located not too far from the open field where the horses and ponies roamed. “This lake is mostly for the ducks and birds, but you can take a dip in it if you feel like it.”

“It’s clean?” He asks as the horses immediately approach the water and begin drinking from it. “You’re telling me that I can relax in it without worrying that there’s something in it that isn’t supposed to be in there?”

“I wouldn’t say that, you should definitely make sure when you want to take a dip that there isn’t anything suspicious-looking.” You say. “Snakes could be inside it, or a duck could have laid her eggs nearby, and trust me when I say this, you do not want to be chased by an angry mama duck.” He chuckles and shakes his head.

“No, right, I definitely wouldn’t want that to happen.” He says. “They’re scary when they’re protective of their eggs.” Taehyung looks around the area, admiring the view from it.

“I have people that come out every year to inspect it, clean it also, just be sure that there isn’t anything inside it that shouldn’t be in there.” You say. “I wouldn’t want any animals to drink it if it’s not healthy or clean for them, because this water mostly comes from my water tank when it overflows when I fill it each weekend, I usually let it overflow for about thirty minutes to make sure the lake has enough water.” You point towards the pipe coming out from the ground. “Just to be sure that nobody is without water, even though there is a stream not far from here.”

“And during the winter?” He asks, surely the water would be less during the cold months.

“It freezes over a little until the sun comes out for a bit, but we both know that the sun isn’t as strong either, so some days it doesn’t melt the ice, but there’s barely anything aside from the birds drinking and bathing in this water, so it lasts a bit longer than it does during the summer.” You say, he nods his head, and you pull on the reins and begin guiding your horse away from the water, he does the same and steers his horse to follow yours as you guide your horse down another path. “You should see the meadow before it completely freezes over, I don’t want you to wait until summer to see it, not that it doesn’t look absolutely beautiful when it’s covered with snow, it’s just something you have to see before everything wither's away from the cold.” He nods his head as he chuckles.

“Wither's away.” He chuckles out. “I understand what you mean, it probably looks much different during the different seasons.” You nod your head. “Do you go there often then?”

“A lot during the summer.” You say. “When I want to think or be alone with my thoughts, Terry and Pizzie usually join me, but they seem to be enjoying Yeontan’s company today as you can see they’re not here with us today.” He looks around and notices unlike the last time, they weren’t accompanying them this time. “Most of the time I leave my phone at home just to have some peace and quiet, an hour of downtime.” He nods his head as he listens. “Don’t worry, it’s not just my spot, if you ever feel like you need a moment to yourself, the meadow is definitely the spot to go to.”

“I will remember that for when I ever feel like that.” He says. “And if that day ever does come, I’ll inform you of my absence.” A smile begins pulling at the corner of your lips.

“I would appreciate that, but you don’t have to.” You say, the trees surrounding you became thicker before it opened up to reveal a meadow, thick grass covered the ground with tiny flowers hanging as they begged for water to bloom again, a stream could be seen not far from the open field, the sound of water rushing through it to get to its destinations reached your ears, a few giant trees were near the sparkling stream, birds chirping underneath it as they bathed in the water.

“Do you have two lakes?” He asks in amazement, the view in front of him seemed like it was ripped right out of a fantasy movie.

“A lake and a stream.” You say. “This one is pure nature, I don’t touch it or let anyone else touch it.” The horses move close to the stream before stopping next to it, in the distance, a waterfall could barely be heard as the water loudly crashed down into the stream.

“Is the waterfall on your farm?” He asks as he heard it, he looks at you, and you nod your head before lifting your hand, pointing in the direction of the waterfall.

“If we keep following the stream along this way then we would find it.” You say, he nods his head, wanting to ask if they could go see it. “Come on, let me go show it to you.” You pull at the reins letting your horse turn to the side, you use your lower legs to squeeze behind the grith which caused your horse to start walking, Taehyung did the same movements as you and his horse follow next to yours. “You may get a tiny bit wet from the water spray.”

“That’s all right, today is kind of warm for an autumn day.” He says, you glance at him and saw a noticeable layer of sweat coating his honey skin, the button-up shirt he wore clung to his skin, morning had long passed since you and Taehyung started riding and exploring your farm, so you could understand why he would be covered with sweat, you could feel your own skin feeling a bit sticky from sweat.

You continue to guide your horse along the stream while still talking to each other, getting to know each other more and more, during the entire walk you started growing fonder of him and started to become more comfortable around him and the idea of him being on your farm, helping you around the farm, you slowly started trusting him, but that didn’t mean that you wouldn’t be cautious of him until you were certain that you could fully trust him, but you would definitely let your brother know that you didn’t want to get rid of him at the end of the month, you arrive at the waterfall, it wasn’t big, but the stream was strong enough to cause it to fall loudly down into the water below, which caused it to splash and spray everywhere, the surrounding area was constantly wet and sometimes frozen over in winter, but quickly became green during spring.

“Oh, this looks so beautiful.” He says. “Especially with that small rainbow inside the spray.” He glances at you. “It’s probably always there, right?” You nod your head as you move closer to it and into the splash of the water, the horses stop in their step, not wanting to move any closer to it. “That feels almost refreshing.” He could feel the spray hitting him, the cool water cooling down his hot sweat-covered skin, bumps forms on your skin from the cold water hitting you.

“It’s always nice to be here.” You say, you pull at the reins making your horse turn. “That tree over there.” Taehyung looks towards the direction your horse was facing. “That is the best spot to sit and watch, sometimes read, but most of the time I just sit there and watch and listen to everything, if you sit long enough you will see fawns approach to drink some water.”

“You can?” He asks as his face light up, you nod your head. “That just sounds like a dream.” You softly giggle. “It seems peaceful here, do you come to this spot often also?” He pulls on the reins and turns his horse to the spot you were facing. “Because it seems like a spot you could come to when you want to figure something's out.”

“Not as often, but I do come to this spot to think or just get away from everything when it feels like it’s getting too much.” You say. “In the summer it can be nice to walk through the spray to keep cool from the hot weather.” He nods his head as he continues to admire the spot. “Come on, let me go show you the final spot, the sun is getting low, and it’s the perfect time to go show it to you.” You pull at the reins slightly to turn your horse before squeezing your lower legs which caused your horse to start moving forward, Taehyung does the same, and you begin making your way back down the stream.

“I’ve noticed that some of your horses respond to just certain movements you make, but others respond to noise.” He points out, you nod your head.

“The two we rode the other day are young ones, they still need to learn the movements that you make when you want them to move, these two are older ones.” You explain. “They’ve been learned with just a little squeeze of your lower legs that it’s time to go.” He nods his head. “But these two were also specifically trained to feel the squeeze, in case I find myself in a situation with one of my horses being deaf.” His lips slightly part, he hadn’t thought of that before. “Every animal deserves a chance to live, no matter the situation unless it would cause them more suffering…”

“I understand…” He trails off knowing what you meant. “Hopefully you haven’t had to endure such a situation yet.” You faintly smile at him.

“Unfortunately I did.” You say. “But that was a long time ago.” You continue to talk as you take him to the final destination before you would be heading back to the stables, he asked about the incident, and you told him which result in him bursting into tears with you, you quickly brightened the mood by sharing another story which caused him to laugh, he shared a story with you as you approach a small path that leads to the cliff, the sun begins moving lower and lower as the minute's tick by, Taehyung quickly notices as you approach the cliff that it displayed the sunset perfectly.

“Whoa…” He breathes out as his jaw slacks, he watches the view as the sun slowly lowers down. “This is so beautiful.” He turns his head to look at you, his eyes sparkling with joy. “Have you stayed to watch the sunset?”

“A bunch of times.” You say. “It’s beautiful, it’s also a nice spot to have a picnic.” You had in the past watched the sunsets and brought yourself a picnic basket and a blanket to relax, you had even cleared a spot for yourself to just sit and relax and unwind from the day, usually, Terry and Pizzie would also join you for those evening, they would run around, sniff everything before laying down on the blanket with you, you would take out the food you had packed for them. “You should definitely come here one night to watch it with Yeontan.”

“Oh, I will, I definitely will.” He says as he stares at the view with amazement in his eyes. “Soon.” You smile before looking at him.

“Should we head back or do you want to stay a little longer?” You ask, he didn’t want to leave just yet, he wanted to watch the sunset. “Do you want to come over for dinner tonight also?” Those words quickly made him change his mind about staying there to watch the sunset, he would have plenty of opportunities in the future to watch it, but how many times would you invite him over for dinner? And he was starving after only having breakfast that morning.

“Yes.” He says. “Yes to both of your questions.” You saw this as another perfect opportunity to get to know more about him over dinner, to learn what he liked and disliked, you still had so many questions for him and he most likely still had tons to ask you. “Just so you know, I’m not an expert at making food.”

“That’s all right, as long as you can help only a little.” You say. “Like cutting vegetables or stir occasionally.”

“I can at least do that.” He says. “What do you have in mind?”

“Elk stew.” You say. “Hope you don’t mind.”

“Oh, no, no, it sounds interesting, I don’t think I’ve ever had it before.” He says. “I’m looking forward to tasting it.”

“It takes a long time to make, but it’s definitely worth it.” You say.

“I don’t mind waiting, especially if you say that it’s worth the wait.” He says, you pull on the reins and guide your horse back down the path you had come from, his horse follows alongside yours. “Besides, it has meat in, right?” You nod your head. “Then it’s worth the wait.”

After arriving back at the stables and unsaddling the horses Taehyung said that he would take care of everything while you can put the meat onto the stove for it to begin cooking, it didn’t take long after you had started cooking it for him to join you in the kitchen, he washes his hands before you had told him to chop some dill while you were gathering the spices and herbs you would use in the stew, he had noticed another pot on the stove with potatoes inside it, the delicious smell filled his nostrils and his stomach growled with hunger.

“It already smells so good.” He says. “I can already tell that it’s going to taste so good.” You smile as you add some spices to the boiling water. “That just made the smell stronger and better.” You softly giggle as you move towards him, you place your hands on the counter next to the chopping board.

“You’re hyping it up so much, I hope it lives up to that hype you’re giving it.” You say and glance down at the dill he was cutting. “Any troubles or problems?”

“No, no problems.” He says as he begins cutting again. “How much do you need?”

“Finish that one then it will be just enough.” You say, he nods his head, and you move away from him to check on the meat in the pot, after finishing the dill he was busy with he moves it closer to the pot for when you would add them.

“How long have you been making this stew?” He asks.

“It’s been in our family for generations, and I’ve been making it ever since I learned how to cook.” You say. “It’s one of my absolute favourite dishes to make.” He could hear the smile in your voice without needing to look up at you. “I remember as a kid that I waited for hours to taste this, the aroma filled the house and you just had to wait until it was finished and time to eat.” Fondness in your voice as you spoke, he looks at you and watches as a smile tugs on your lips as you think back to that time. “The first time I made it or tried to make it, it wasn’t as good, but things take time and practice.”

“It sounds like an interesting story.” He says. “Would you be willing to tell me that story one day?” You nod your head.

“I will, one day.” You say. “Maybe even over dinner tonight.” He watches as you stir the stew, the scent from it hitting him and enveloping him in almost a comforting embrace.

“It feels like I’m about to start drooling because of that smell.” He says making you giggle. “I’m serious, I can feel my stomach begging me to taste it.”

“It’s almost finished then you can taste it.” You say as you add the dill to it. “Just a few more minutes.” You place the lid onto the pot.

“Okay… wait it’s almost ready?” He asks.

“Almost.” You say. “I can’t believe the time went by that quickly, usually it feels like it takes much longer than this.”

“My company is just that good.” He says in a joking tone.

“Must be that it.” You say. “Good company makes the time fly by faster and the wait shorter.” You turn your body to face him. “So yes, you are very good company, no joke.” You could see the surprise in his eyes at your words. “Why do you seem so surprised, did you not think that you were good company?”

“I uh… I just wasn’t expecting you to agree.” He says. “But it’s a good surprise I’m experiencing right now.” You softly smile before turning back to the pot, slowly, you were getting used to each other, slowly opening up and trusting each other a little more.

“Did someone tell you that you were bad company once?” You ask. “Because I can assure you that they were lying.” You lift the lid from the pot and places it on the counter, you stir the stew before scooping a little of the sauce onto the spoon and gently blows on it.

“I’ll tell you about it one day.” He says, you nod your head and slightly turns towards him.

“Taste.” You say as you move the spoon closer to him, he looks at the spoon before moving closer to it, he tastes it and moves the taste around his mouth before he starts nodding his head.

“Hm, wow, that tastes so good.” He says, you smile to yourself as you turn the burner off and made your way to one of the cabinets, you take out two plates and place them on the counter.

“Would you like anything to drink?” You ask right as you were about to reach for the cabinet that held the glasses and cups.

“Not right now maybe later.” He says, you nod your head and move to the cutlery drawer and takes out the utensils you would be using before pushing the plates closer to the stove, you pick up the spoon you stirred the stew with and hands it to Taehyung.

“You can scoop in first.” You say, he takes the spoon from you looking unsure.

“Are you sure?” He asks. “You made it, the chef should have some first.”

“And you are my guest, so go ahead.” You say as you remove the lid from the other pot that had the cooked potatoes in it. “Looks like these are also ready.” You glance at Taehyung as he slowly fills his plate with the stew. “Don’t be shy, if you’re hungry make sure you get a lot, I won’t judge.” A smile forms on his lips before he adds more to his plate.

“Thank you.” He says. “For inviting me to dinner and making dinner, and for also showing me around your farm today.” You gently smile at him as you bring your plate closer, you begin scooping in some potatoes.

“You’re going to be here for a long time, so you might as well see more of the farm, and this is the perfect opportunity for us to get to know each other and become more comfortable with each other.” You say, he hands you the spoon to the stew and you hand him the spoon for the potatoes before switching places with him. “I’m sure that you still have a lot to ask me just like I also still have a lot to ask you.”

“I’m glad to hear that you plan on keeping me around for a while.” He says as he scoops some potatoes in. “I was worried you wouldn’t want to since your brother didn’t tell you about hiring me.” A gentle smile forms on your lips.

“My brother does things… that he thinks will help me or be helpful.” You say. “Sometimes the things he does for me work out for the better, other times he’s apologising for something I told him not to do.” You move to the table in the kitchen after filling your plate with the stew, you place the plate down on the table. “But this time it seems like he doesn’t have to apologise for what he did.” Taehyung moves to the other side of the dining table and places his plate down on the table. “I’m impressed with how much you have helped me around here.” You sit down at the table and move your chair closer, he sits down across from you and moves closer to the table.

“I’m glad to hear that.” He says. “And you’re right, I still have a lot to ask you.”

“And I’ll answer with what I’m comfortable with.” You say. “Don’t worry, the more I learn to trust you and the more I get to know you, the more I’ll be comfortable around you, and share more with you.”

“Of course, I’m not expecting you to share with me immediately or everything.” He says, you nod your head giving him a warm smile before glancing down at your plate.

“I’m glad about that.” You say as you look up at him. “Well, dig in, I hope it lives up to the hype you’ve given it.” He slightly chuckles and takes his first bite of it, your head was looking down at your plate, but your eyes were carefully watching him, watching his reaction as you cut your potatoes, you were curious about his reaction when he would taste the meat, this is your favourite dish, and you were hoping that he would like it, it almost seemed like his chewing had shown down as he tasted it, the smoky taste from the meat covered the taste of the dill, the flavour awakening his taste buds, his eyes widen, and he looks up nodding this head in approval.

“Oh, wow.” He says after swallowing. “Wow, I knew it would taste good after tasting the sauce, but this is just…” He gathers more. “This is delicious, where has this been all my life?” You softly chuckle as you move your fork to your mouth and take a bite from the potatoes you just cut. “This is just… I’m not sure how to explain it, it’s really good.”

“I’m glad to hear that it lived up to the hype you gave it.” You say after swallowing, he nods his head and stuffs his mouth with more stew. “There’s enough if you want a second plate, or if you want some for tomorrow.” He nods his head.

“I definitely think I should take some with me.” He says.

“I’ll put some aside for you.” You say.

You continue eating and had small conversation here and there with each other, he continues to praise the taste of the stew every few bites, making you giggle each time he did, you hadn’t expected him to like it as much as you do, but with how he complimented it and made sure to remind you to scoop some out for him assured you that he loved it just as much as you did if not more.

“Here, let at least wash the plates.” He says as you put the plates into the kitchen sink.

“You don’t have to do it, I’ll do it later.” You say.

“I insist.” He says. “I enjoyed the meal that you cooked for us, I should at least help clean up.” He moves towards the sink.

“If you insist.” You say, you were surprised, never in your life had you met anyone willing to help with the dishes, usually, everyone enjoyed the meal and dropped their plate into the sink before disappearing from the kitchen, leaving the dishes to you. “The soap is underneath the sink along with the sponge.” He takes a step back and opens the cabinet doors underneath the sink, he takes out the soap and sponge and closes the doors.

“I always helped with the dishes in my home after we ate.” He says. “It’s something I think I’m good at, and I feel like I’m helping after my attempt at helping to make the food failed.”

“But you helped tonight, you cut the dill.” You say, he chuckles and shakes his head as he begins washing the first plate.

“It didn’t feel like enough, so let me be more helpful with the cleaning.” He says, you nod your head as your eyes move down to his hands, you couldn’t help but stare at them for a moment, admiring them, ‘I… how… his hands.’ You thought to yourself before looking away and grabbing a drying cloth, you take the plate from his hands after he washed it and dries it off, your mind begins to drift back to his hands for a moment.

“Ahem.” You clear your throat as you shake your head. “What would you like to drink?” You ask as you put the plate down on the counter.

“Just some tea if you have some.” He says, you nod your head and hangs the drying cloth over your shoulder as you move to the kettle, you check how much water it has in before going to the fridge and took out a bottle of water, you didn’t want to go near the sink and get distracted by his hands again, you pour the bottled water into the kettle and turns it on.

“Do you have a specific flavoured tea that you like?” You ask.

“No, not really, or none that I can think about right now.” He says, you nod your head and took out two cups and begins preparing them, he finishes washing the other plate and places it on the drying rack. “Can I use your bathroom?” You nod your head as you turn around to face him.

“Yes, it’s just down the hall, you will see it.” You instruct, he nods his head and exits the kitchen, you take in a deep breath before moving towards the plate to dry it, ‘It’s going to be an intense, fuck, I mean interesting few months.’

━━━━━━♡♥♡━━━━━━

A year and six months quickly pass since your brother hired Taehyung, things had been going smoothly, for the most part, you grew closer and closer to him and learned more about him as the months passed, but then you started to pick up the little things, the smallest of things had become noticeable to you, you would pick up the littlest quirks, it didn’t take you long to realize that you had developed feelings for him, but instead of accepting them, you denied them, writing them off as nothing but a crush, a crush you would get over, but then you started to notice all his tiny flaws that weren’t visible when you met him, and you loved them, that… that was when you knew that you had fallen for him.

The mole on his nose was the cutest thing to you as well as the one on his lower eyelid, the two moles on his arms that he seems to like to most and showed off while giving it an elephant face was absolutely adorable to you, but the one that distracted you the most, the one you wanted to stare at all day, but couldn’t, was the one on his lips, you wanted to admire his soft plump lips all day, watch them stretch into a wide smile or into the boxy smile he made, all those things were burned into your mind, haunting your dreams, your thoughts were consumed with it when you were busy with work, making food, ordering medication and food for the animals, some days you would even catch yourself daydreaming about him, but you would quickly shake your head as you tried to erase the images from your mind, you are his boss, and he is your employee, it would never work, even if it does work… he doesn’t feel the same, he doesn’t think of you in the same way… Just thinking about it made you lean forward in your office chair and place your pencil down on the table.

“Or does he…?” You mutter to yourself as your brows furrow. “No, no he definitely doesn’t.” You lean back against the chair as you bring your hand to your head, gently rubbing your temples. “Ugh.” If it weren’t his lips distracting you, it was his hands, the way they held something, the way they appeared to be sculpted. “Dammit!” You push the chair away from the desk and stood. “I should let him know about the visitor tomorrow.” You had noticed the small changes in your feelings towards him, and they continued to grow, you kept them to yourself and only told Waffles, Terry and Pizzie about them, you were hoping those feelings would eventually go away… but they only became stronger.

Stepping into the stables with your eyes on the ground as you thought about what you were going to tell him, you knew he was there, you had heard him working with one of the horses, you look up from the ground and saw him guiding the horse into the stall before closing and locking the door, his skin was coated with a visible layer of sweat, you could see his muscles flexing as he pulled the stall door closed, his hair was wet from the sweat and stuck to his forehead.

“Shit.” You mumble at the sight, he turns towards you and smiles at you. “Uh, um, hi.” You clear your throat as you take a step towards him. “I uh, I need to tall— I mean to tell you something.” Your mind couldn’t focus on creating proper words, forming them properly, you could feel your cheeks heating up as blood rushed to them, ‘stop stumbling!’ you thought to yourself. “I’m here to… uh, tell you… something.” Your sentence was slow as you tried not to fall over your words, he nods his head as he walks towards his bag that was on the ground.

“I’m listening.” He says as he picks up the water bottle next to his bag, he unscrews the cap and takes a sip from it, his head tilts back as he does, your eyes move to his neck as you watch his Adam's apple bobbing up and down as he swallows, sweat rolls down his neck before disappearing into the fabric of the button-up, he lowers the bottle and puts the cap back on and placed it down next to his bag. “Are you okay?” He walks towards you, his long legs carrying him towards you quickly, he stops in front of you, you slowly look up at him.

“I uh…” You begin saying, but your words get caught up in your throat. “We uh… someone will be… ahem.” You clear your throat as you avoided looking into his eyes, ‘the more I avoid them, maybe I’ll get out of here faster.’ You thought to yourself, your hands became clammy as your nerves spiked. “Someonewillbevisitingtomorrowtoseeiftheywanttobuyahorse.” Your words came out faster than you intended, he moves closer to you, knots in his eyes as he stared at you in confusion.

“I missed that entirely.” He says. “Could you repeat it?” You could feel your knees wanting to buckle beneath you, you needed to say it again, but slowly and then get out of there to go sit down, you nervously smile at him and nod your head.

“Yes, of course.” You say. “Uh, someone is coming to visit tomorrow, they’re going to see if there’s a horse that they want to buy.” He nods his head.

“All right, I’ll make sure everything is in order for tomorrow.” He says, you nod your head and turn to leave, he quickly grabs your hand stopping you from leaving, you could feel the warmth from his hand in yours as he held onto it, something seemed to run through your veins when he touched you, but you weren’t sure what it was, you just knew and felt your heart rate picking up. “I’ve been meaning to ask you something.” You slowly turn back to face him, a smile on your lips but on the inside, it felt like you were going to collapse.

“Yes?” You say. “Is something bothering you? Are you unhappy here?” The wheels in your mind started turning as you thought that he was starting to become unhappy on the farm with you, ‘Did he get another offer? A better offer?’

“It’s nothing like that.” He says. “I’m still happy here, but something is bothering me, and it has been for a few months now.” You nod your head and waited for him to continue. “I thought if I ignored it at first then it would sort itself out, but it doesn't seem like it has, so, is something bothering you?”

“I uh, wh— why do you think that?” You were caught off guard by his question.

“Did I do something wrong?” He asks. “You’ve been distant…” He trails off before shaking his head. “Okay, not distant but acting a little off when you’re around me.” You swallow, your mouth suddenly drying up. “I would like to know if I did something wrong or something that had upset you.”

“No, I… No, no you didn’t.” You say almost dumbfounded. “You didn’t do anything at all.” He nods his head and moves closer to you, he leans down, you could feel the heat from his skin.

“Then I’m glad.” He says. “And then also, I’d like to try something.” Your eyes meet his and caught him staring at your lips. “If you don’t mind.” You were about to answer him, but your words were swallowed by his lips brushing against yours, your eyes widen as you felt his cushiony lips against yours, it took a moment before you leaned into the kiss, your eyes slowly starting to shut only for him to pull away.

“I…” You begin before stopping, you weren’t sure what you were supposed to say, ‘That you liked it! That you wanted him to do it one more time! Or the more times…’

“I’d like to do that again.” He says. “You seemed to shock to respond.” You quickly pull your hand out from his and place both your hand on his shoulders, your eyes blown wide open as you stare into his. “Is this your way of saying you don’t feel the same way?”

“No.” You say. “I’d like for you to kiss me again.” He didn’t need to be invited twice to kiss you again, his lips slam against yours as his hands move to your hips, lightly gripping the clothed skin, you could feel his fingers slightly digging into the flesh, his tongue runs over your bottom lip for a moment, you took his tongue between your lips and sucks on it for a moment before pulling away. “If you inflict any type of pain on me, this ends, same goes for name-calling, especially degrading names.” Your lips were slightly swollen from the kiss. “Do you understand?”

“Yes, I understand.” He says knowing that this was about to become much more than just a heated kiss. “I understand completely.” You nod your head and use your strength to turn him around and back him into the stable walls, he was much taller than you were, you had to look up at him to look at his face because if you had looked at him straight ahead you would be staring at his chest.

“Good, I’m glad you do.” You say as your hands move down his arms, feeling the hot flesh beneath your touch as well as his muscles, damn were you glad it was summer, and he was wearing a short-sleeved button-up shirt. “Because I really don’t want to stop right now.”

“I don’t want you to stop.” He says, you lean closer as he leans downs and presses his lips against yours, his hand on your hips moving over your stomach before moving between your legs, cupping your clothed pussy, feeling the heat through your pants and panties, his fingers pressed against your pussy while his other hand moves up your side, brushing over the side of your tit as he moved it to cup your cheek. “Then what can I call you?” He sounded out of breath as he spoke, your lips still close to his, ready to collide again after you had pulled away from the kiss.

“My name.” You whisper. “Or any other nickname unless it’s a degrading one.” You move one of your hands away from his arm and down towards his cock and cups it through his jeans and felt that he was starting to grow hard, his eyes roll to the back of his head, something you quickly caught and couldn’t help but feel a boost in your confidence. “Do I have such an effect on you?” You rub your hand on his jeans, palming him through the rough fabric.

“Hm.” He moans, that would be the first of many moans you would pull from him, and just hearing it made you more excited to hear more noises coming from him.

“Let’s see what you have been hiding underneath all these layers.” You say as your other hand drops down his shirt, your fingers making quick work to unbutton his shirt, he tilts his head back, leaning it against the wall, both of your hands grip at the shirt and pulls it off his shoulders and down his arms before tossing it to the side, you lick your lips as your eyes move over his chest, he was even more perfect than you had imagined, your fingers trace over his chest moving them lower and lower, you lean closer and place a kiss on his chest.

“Is it what you imagined it to be?” He asks as if he knew that you had been imagining this for months now, you could feel his chest rumble as he spoke.

“It’s better, much better.” You say not even glancing up at his face, your lips continue to kiss his chest, leaving soft kisses everywhere until your lips reached his nipple, your lips halt above it before you slip your tongue out from your mouth and flick it over his nipple.

“Hm.” He hums at the sensation, a smirk forms on your lips before you do it again, you could feel his hand pressing harder between your legs pressing more against your pussy, you move to his other nipple and do the same before leaving kisses around the bud, your hands move down to his jeans and begin fumbling to unbutton the button on his jeans. “Struggling?” He rasps out.

“Shh.” You shush him just as you popped the button open. “I don’t need help undressing you.” Your hands move to the zipper and easily undoes it, your fingers curl around the fabric and pushes it down, he quickly moves his feet around as he removes his shoes and kicks them aside, his jeans pool around his ankles, he quickly manoeuvres them off his feet before kicking them aside. “Seems like you’re eager.” Your hand moves over his underwear and felt that he had hardened. “Hm, I can feel that you’re eager.” You move your hand to his that was between your legs, taking hold of it before moving it to the top of your pants. “Do you want to feel what you’re doing to me?”

“Yes.” He breathes out as he lifts his head away from the wall, he looks down between the two of you, at the position of his hand as you slip it into your pants, he quickly moves his hand over your panties and rubs your folds through the layer of your panties, feeling your wetness leaking from you and forming a wet patch on the fabric. “Oh my…” He sighs out, his cock twitches as blood rushes to it.

“Do you feel that?” You ask, he nods his head. “Good.” You pull his hand from your pants and lifts it to his mouth. “Have a taste.” His lips open and wrap around his fingers, tasting the clear liquid that was on his fingers, your release his hand and moves your hand to his underwear, your fingers curl around the band of it and carefully pushes it down, you release it when it reached his knees letting it pool around his feet, he steps out from it and moves it aside with his foot.

“Fuck, how did this happen?” He asks as he notices that he was the only one naked while you still had all your clothes on.

“Easily.” You say before moving down to your knees, his eyes follow you as you lower down in front of him, his eyes widen at the sight of you in front of him on your knees, inches away from his hardening cock, you glance up at him as you wrap your hands around his length. “Let me know if I do anything wrong here.”

“I’ll help you, I’ll tell you what I like and don’t.” He says, you nod your head and begin moving your hand along his length, your thumb circles around the head collecting the leaking liquid from the slit and spreads it over his length. “Gosh…” He closes his eyes as he felt your thumb teasing the slit, your other hand moves up and down his length feeling him becoming harder with each pump, you could feel the veins on his cock underneath your touch.

“You feel so good.” You say as you move your eyes to his cock. “Fuck, you’re so fucking big.” He opens his eyes to look at you as you stared at his enormous cock. “I’m starting to wonder if it will fit.”

“I… hem… uh.” He wasn’t sure how to respond, his cheeks heated up as blood rushed to them, was he supposed to feel proud of his size or embarrassed that you were questioning if it would fit or not. “I… I’m sure it will.” He manages to choke out, you look up at him with innocent eyes.

“You sound sure of it.” You say. “But I guess we’ll see.” You lean closer to his length and kiss the tip, silver strings of the clear liquid stuck to your lips as you pulled away before they snapped and rolled down your chin.

“Oh… go—“ His words get caught in his throats at the sight of his pre-cum on your chin, your lips wrap around his cock and begin moving your head up and down, wetting it and arousing him even more at the feeling of your warm mouth moving over his cock, it felt like he wanted to roll his eyes to the back of his head and shut them to enjoy the pleasure he was receiving, but he also wanted to watch you as you stared up at him, your eyes being the only thing that kept him from closing his, you unwrap one hand from his length and move it to his balls and gently took them in your hands. “Fuck… fuck, I thought you hadn’t done this before!” Your tongue darts in and out of his slit while your hand moves up and down his length that wasn’t in your mouth while your other hand gently massaged his balls, you take more of him into your mouth, using your tongue to slide more of his length into your mouth, you felt the tip hit the back of your throat and stop, you hallow your cheeks as you slowly slide him out of your mouth, making sure that your tongue was against his cock as you did, his length slips out from your mouth, and you begin peppering kisses down his length, he places one hand against the wall and moves the other hand— the one that was still near his lips after cleaning your juices from them— to your hair, his fingers entangle with your hair and softly holds onto them.

“Don’t you dare pull on my hair.” You warn him.

“Okay.” He breathes out. “But I don’t want to cum in your mouth or on you.” You move your head away, your eyes never leaving his. “Get up so I can undress you.” His eyes were clouded with lust, his brown eyes seemed darker than usual. “You’ve teased and warmed me up enough unless you want me to release in your mouth… or your clothes… or do you want it inside you?” You release his balls and his cock before standing up, you place your hands on his chest, a cocky smile on your lips.

“And who said you’re allowed to release inside me?” You ask. “If you don’t have any protection right here and now, then you’re going to have to pull out.” His hand slides through your hair. “Or we should end things here.” He plays the tips of your hair before pushing himself away from the wall and moves past you, he goes towards his bag and lifts it, pulling it open and searches through it, he had visited his parents only a few days ago and met up with his friend and ended up telling his friend about you which resulted in his friend buying him a box of condoms before he had returned to the farm, luckily he remembered his friend dropped the box into the bag he was searching through and thanked the universe that he had forgotten to take it out, you walk up behind him just as he finds the newly bought box. “Oh, look at that, it’s like you planned this, or the universe really wants this to happen.” You take the box from him. “Go get us a blanket.” He goes towards the shed that contained the horse equipment and searched through the blankets you had in there before finding one that looked the most comfortable. “Fuck.” You almost choke on your own spit as you saw the size on the box. “I knew it, how are you going to fit?” He throws the blanket open on the ground.

“Lay down.” He orders you, you toss him the box of condom before leaning over to unlace your shoes, you step out of them and made your way to the blanket and sits down on it. “I said lay, not sit.”

“Oh, ordering the boss around now, I see.” You say as you lay back on the blanket, he drops the box of condoms next to you on the blanket, he moves over you.

“And to answer your question.” He says as he leans down to your ear. “I’ll make sure that I will fit.” You could feel a shiver running through you at his words. “But I’ll also stop if you just say the word.” His hands move to the hem of your shirt and curl his fingers around the fabric, his knuckles brush up against your skin as he begins removing the shirt, you sit upright and allows him to easily remove the shirt, his hands instantly goes to your ribs after he dropped your shirt next to you, his hands flatten against your skin before he slides them to your back and towards the clasp of your bra, he moves to sit on his knees and leans closer to your chest, his lips wrap around your erect nipple through the fabric.

“Oh.” You gasp as you felt the fabric of your bra rub against your nipple and become wet from his saliva, your panties were already soaked from getting a taste of his cock, just imagining his cock sliding against your walls had caused you to become soaked which caused your panties to become wet, your bra suddenly felt loose around you which made you realized he had unclasped it and it was just clinging to your shoulders, his hands move to your shoulders and gently rubs them before his fingers curled around the straps, he pulls away from your nipple as he pulls the straps down your arms, he removes the piece of fabric and drops it where he had dropped your shirt, his lips connect with your collarbone and begins leaving a trail of kisses on it as he moves to your shoulder and back to your collarbone, he kisses down to your chest and down your sternum before moving to the nipple he hadn’t sucked, his lips wrap around the bud and gently begins sucking on it while his hands moved to your lower stomach and rests on your abdomen, you lay back on the blanket and he follows you, hovering over you, his lips almost releasing your nipple.

“Ohh.” You moan out as one of your hands move to his head, your fingers move through his hair while the other hand presses into the blanket, feeling the hard ground beneath it, his tongue circles the bud before he flattens his tongue against it. “Tae…” It almost sounded like a whine when you said his name, his lips release your nipple and gently blows on it causing it to harden from the cold air.

“The way you whine my name…” He breathes out before his lips brushed over your ribs, he moves lower as his lips move down your stomach, his fingers curl around the band of your pants and tugs at it, you bend your knees and press your heels into the ground and lifts your hips allowing him to remove your pants, the fabric slides along your legs before reaching your ankles, his eyes shift to between your legs and saw the damp spot on your panties. “So fucking wet.” You lower your hips and lift your feet, he removes your pants and pushes them aside. “Are you this wet because of me?” He licks his lips as he looks up at you. “Did sucking my cock make you this wet?”

“Mh, Tae…” You whine as you lift your head to look at him. “Touch me.” He places a hand on your thigh and slowly slides it upwards and between your thighs, his other hand grabs the back of your knee and pulls it to the side, spreading your legs apart and giving himself more access, he moves between your legs making sure that you wouldn’t be able to clamp them shut, he places a hand on your hip while his other hand reaches your moist pussy, his fingers trace along your clothed folds, feeling the wetness on it. “Oh.”

“Tell me what you want, what you like.” He says while stroking your clothed pussy lips, collecting the wetness that had seeped through the fabric of your panties, the feeling of his sculpted fingers touching your pussy felt so good already, you had to think properly for a minute before you could answer him, ‘Where did I want them the most? What did I want his fingers to do to me? Fuck he should remove those forsaken panties!’

“Get rid of my panties, touch me, stroke my pussy.” You breathe out, he smirks before pulling his hand away from your pussy and moves it to the elastic of your panties, his fingers curl around the fabric and pull them down, you lift your hips allowing him to remove the piece of fabric, you lower your hips to the ground and lift your feet to let him completely discard your panties, he places the fabric near his bag.

“What else do you want me to do, angel?” He asks in a deep husky tone, making you shiver, you couldn’t wait until he was whimpering and moaning, you desperately wanted to hear those noises come from him, ‘How would he looked fucked out?’ You thought before those thoughts were interrupted when his hand cupped your pussy.

“Clit, touch my clit.” You sigh, it only took a few seconds for you to feel his fingers move between your folds and stroke them, he could hear your wetness each time his fingers stroked along them. “Hm.” You whine out, you wanted those fingers of him on your clit, but he was teasing you, his fingers continue to stroke your fold, stopping every few seconds to massage them. “Tae…” Hearing his name already fall from your lips had him more excited which caused his cock to twitch against his stomach. “Tae… please…” His fingers move towards your clit, finally giving you what you want, his index finger circles around your clit. “Oh.” Your muscles stiffen at the foreign touch before you let out a sigh and allowed your muscles to relax, pleasure rushes through your veins.

“You’re responding to my touch so well.” He praises, watching your body twitch and react to his touch on your clit, he was vigorously rubbing circles around your clit, rubbing it back and forth and from side to side. “Look at you, so damn beautiful like this.” Two fingers were now circling your clit before he took the nub between his thumb and forefinger, slowly he rolled it between his fingers.

“Fu— ck!” You moan out as your back arches off the blanket, his fingers seemed to work magic on your clit, making you moan and whimper at the pleasure he’s causing, a tightening feeling was forming in your abdomen as it felt like the pleasure was going to boil over soon. “You… your fingers…” Your breathing was shallow as you tried to speak. “So good.” Your hands move to your head and run your fingers through your hair, gripping at it. “Aah.” His fingers disappear from your clit and slide down to your sopping hole, a finger slips inside you. “Go—“ your words get caught in your throat as you felt his finger twist and turn inside you, almost exploring your walls.

“Mhm… you feel so good around my finger.” He says. “I can’t wait to feel you when you’re wrapped around my cock.” Your walls clench around his finger at his words. “Oh, clenching around my cock as I’m buried deep inside your delicious pussy.” Your mind became clouded with pleasure as his words went towards your core causing your clit to twitch. “You like when I’m talking to you like this.”

“You… best— aah— uphold that promise— mhm— of being deep inside me.” You breathe out, moaning in between. “Ad— add anoth—OH!” You didn’t need to finish your sentence for him to know what you wanted to say, another finger slips inside you and stretches your walls.

“As you wish, angel.” He says, it almost sounded like he was out of breath from just fingering you as he spoke. “I can hear just how wet you are, listen to that.” You could hear it, the way his fingers caused your wetness to slosh around when he pumped them in and out of you, your toes curl at the sound. “Are you gonna cum for me?” You press your head into the ground, the hard and bumpiness from the ground going unnoticed as the pleasure coursed through your mind and body. “Should I add another finger?” You didn’t have any time to reply before you felt a third finger entering you, your walls stung as the stretch became more.

“Aah hm.” You whimper out, you couldn’t focus on anything around you, your eyes roll to the back of your head as you release your hair, one hand grips the blanket while the other hand fell onto the ground and gripped the straw and sand. “Taeh— yung!” His fingers stop pumping in and out of you before he suddenly curls them inside you. “GO— AAH!” The tips of his fingers coming in contact with your nerve endings inside you, your skin felt like it was set on fire from the pleasure, a tightening feeling pulled in your abdomen, you were close as the feeling became more noticeable. “I’m clo— CLOSE!” He presses his thumb against your clit and rubs the nub vigorously while he curls and extends his fingers inside you, hitting that sensitive spot over and over, your breathing became ragged as you edged closer to your high.

“Cum for me, release around my finger.” He says, it was like he was in control of your body, as soon as he said those words your orgasm hits you, your back arched from the ground as pleasure coursed through you, your mind flew into the clouds as pleasure took control of your body and actions, Taehyung watches as your jaw slacks and your lips part as a loud moan escape from your throat, he could see your entire body relax while your muscles twitched, you had no control over your body as you went through your high. “Look at you looking like an angel.” He slowly pumps his fingers in and out of you, easing you through your high, his movements stop once you lifted your head to look at him through half-lidded eyes, lust still in them.

“An angel, huh?” Your tone was low, just above a whisper, he slowly removes his fingers from your sopping hole causing your wetness to spill from your hole and leak onto the blanket.

“I think you’re ready for me, for my cock.” He says as he sits onto his knees, he grabs the box of condoms next to you and opens it.

“I have a question.” You say as you prop yourself up onto your elbows, his eyes move to your tits before slowly moving to your face. “Why do you have a box of condoms in your bag?” He could feel the heat rush up his neck to his cheeks. “Isn’t that the bag you have your lunch in?”

“I uh… um.” He stutters. “I uh… I went to visit my parents, and uh met up with a friend, and I, ahem, told him about you…” He clears his throat as he remembered the day he told his friend about you. “And he then bought me a box and placed it in this bag, I uh… ahem, just forgot to take it out.” You nod your head, a smirk forming on your lips.

“Thank goodness then, otherwise you wouldn’t have gotten this far right now.” You say, he nods his head as he removes a foil packet, he drops the box back onto the blanket and ripped the packet open, he places it at the tip of his cock, pinching the tip of the condom, you sit upright and reach for his cock only to notice that your hand was covered with straw and dusk, you quickly clean your hand using the blanket before reaching for his cock, you roll the piece of protection over his cock and looks up at him. “Lay down.” He moves away from the position between your legs and lays down on the blanket, he watches as you straddle his waist and felt the heat from your pussy near his hard cock, you could feel your wetness sliding down your thigh.

“You’re so fucking wet, I can see it sliding down your thighs.” He says as his gaze was fixed between your legs, he watches as your juices leak down onto his lower stomach. “Fucking hell, I’m gonna cum before you’re even wrapped around me.” You reach for his cock and firmly yet gently wrap your hand around it, his eyes fall shut at the touch. “Fuck.” You guide his length between your folds and lubes the piece of protection with your wetness. “I can feel how warm you are… fuck.”

“You sound so desperate to be inside me.” You say, you had to admit, you loved the sound of him being so desperate for you, the sound of him begging to be inside you. “Should I give you what you’re so desperate for?” He could feel your hand moving up and down his length. “Beg for it.”

“Please… Please put it in, I want to feel you, I want to feel you wrapped around me.” He whimpers out. “Please, please.” You guide his length to your sopping hole and pushes the tip inside it. “Oh, yes, yes, go— oh!” You release his length and lower yourself down onto him, you could feel your walls stretching and burning as you slowly take him inch by inch, until he was completely inside you, you gasp for air as you realize you had been holding it in as you had lowered down onto him, you place your hands on his ribs.

“Fucking hell…” You whisper, you could feel his length touching every part of your walls, you felt so full just sitting on his length, the head of his cock was touching your cervix. “Death by Taehyung Kim’s cock.” You breathe out causing him to chuckle which made his cock move inside you. “FUCK!” Your fingers dig into his skin.

“You’re over-exaggerating.” He says. “You feel so nice and tight around me.”

“It's because you’re so damn big!” You say, he places his hands on your hips, making sure not to hurt you. “Just… give me a minute to adjust, okay?” He nods his head and begins rubbing circling on your skin using his thumbs.

“Are you uncomfortable?” He asks as his eyes slowly lower from your face to your abdomen, he could see your chest rising up and down, he could see how stiff your stomach muscles were as you tried to adjust to him. “Relax your muscles, relax, I’ve got you, okay.”

“I’m… okay.” You softly say before taking in a deep breath, you exhale through your mouth and felt your muscles relax as you do. “Slowly.” His thumbs halt on your skin. “I’m going to start slowly.”

“Of course, you should be comfortable during this also.” He says. “I can’t be the only one receiving pleasure, you should and deserve to feel pleasure also.” You softly smile at him before lifting your hips, you could feel his cock brush along your walls as he slides out. “Good go—“ His words get caught in his throat as he felt your walls clench around him.

“Fuck, fuck.” You whisper, it felt like it took hours for him to only slip out halfway, you stop once you felt that it was only the head inside you.

“Are you all right?” He asks as he reaches up, he brushes some of your hair out of your face. “Do you want to stop?”

“No, no, hell no.” You quickly say, you had got this far, and he felt too good for you to stop now, even if It felt like he was tearing you apart. “I’m all right, I’m not stopping, not now.” You lower down onto his cock, faster than the first time, the burn you had felt before was barely noticeable now. “I’m not going to last long.” Your head hangs as you use all the strength in your legs to lift and lower yourself onto his cock, his hand drops from your cheek and goes down to your hip and held you, ready to assist you if he needed to. “I’m still so sensitive…” He could feel your walls clenching around him each time you lowered down on him, milking him for an orgasm, and he wasn’t going to last long either if you continued to clench around him.

“Just keep going, as slow as you want.” He breathes out, his breathing had become deeper from feeling your warm wet walls pulsing around him. “As fast as you want, I’m here to help you when you get tired.” You could feel the warmth from his calloused hands on your skin. “You’re doing so well, taking me so well.” Your pace speeds up, the sound of your wetness could be heard between your panting, moaning and talking.

“Fuck, I…” You pause to gasp. “I don’t know… how long— fuck— I can keep— oh, oh go— riding you.” Your legs felt shaky, like they would give out any second and that you would collapse on him without either of you reaching your high.

“I’ve to you, angel, I’ve got you.” He says, you could feel his grip slightly tightening on your hips before he used his strength to lift and lower you at a decent pace, pleasure moving between you and him, sweat forming on your skin as his became wetter from it, the heat from the summer air made everything around you feel extra hot, hotter than usual.

“Dear fucking gosh!” You tilt your head back as your eyes close with pleasure, you were close, the tightening feeling in your abdomen had returned, and it felt much stronger than before, your entire body felt like it was on the edge of being tipped over with pleasure.

“Keep… clenching around me— oh hm— like that and I won’t… last long.” He moans out, you slide your hand down his toned stomach, your fingers grazing over his skin. “You damn tease.” Just your touch left his skin feeling like it was on fire, you reach between your legs and placed a finger on your clit, the contact to the sensitive nub caused you to clench around his cock harder than before.

“FUCK!” You both moan out at the same time, his grip on your hips tighten and his movements falter for a moment.

“Are you trying to make me lose my mind?” He asks, his grip loosens on your hips before lifting you up and lowering you down onto his length again, he repeats the movement, the pace slowly picking up. “Are you close?” You nod your head, you lift your head and looked down at him, looking completely fucked out.

“Yes.” You breathe out, he could see and feel it, your muscles were twitching and contracting while your walls clenched around his cock as you rubbed your clit, he was close, and he wasn’t sure if he would last much longer, he thrusts upward. “FUCK, TAEHYUNG!” You didn’t even hear the horses moving around as they got startled by your scream, right now you didn’t care if you had heard, you just wanted to reach your high, his cock hits your cervix and brushed along the most sensitive spot inside you, you took your clit between your fingers.

“[Y/n], FUCK!” Your name fell from his lips loudly as his high suddenly hits him, a burst of energy runs through his cock as he fills the condom with his cum, his energy quickly drains from him, but he wasn’t giving up until you would cum as well, you could feel his hands loosening their grip on your hips and by the facial expression on his face, you knew he had reached his high.

“Do I feel that good?” You ask. “Fuck, it must feel that good if you couldn’t hold it back any longer.” Using your last bit of strength and energy, you lift and lower your hips, rolling them into his, you pinch your sensitive nub which caused the tension in your abdomen to snap, your toes curl in pleasure as your body begins shaking with it. “TAEHYUNG!” The moan was so loud he had barely heard it as he was coming down from his high, your mind fell blank and your hand falls away from your pussy, Taehyung moves one of his hand between your legs and took over, he rubs your clit to ease you through your high, your hair stuck to your forehead and neck from the sweat that had formed on your skin, you open your eyes to look down at him, your chest rising up and down.

“How is it possible that you can look so good while being fucked out?” He asks, you could only chuckle before you lifted yourself from his cock that was starting to grow limp, you climb off of him and sit down on the blanket next to him, he sits upright and removes the condom and ties it, he places a hand on your lower back and slowly rubbed soft circles on your skin. “Are you okay?” You nod your head. “Any discomfort?”

“I’ll probably feel it tomorrow if there is any discomfort.” You say as you turn your head to look at him, you would feel it in your legs the most tomorrow, you could already tell that they were going to be stiff. “How about you, are you okay?” He nods his head.

“Yes, I’m more than okay.” He says. “Are you feeling any discomfort right now?” He was concerned, you had told him several times how big he was, yet you took him so well, but he wanted to be sure, no, he needed to be sure.

“Nothing, no discomfort at all.” You say, you had grown accustomed to his size, but you knew that if this was going to happen again, he would have to stretch you again before you would be able to take him. “That was…” You had to think for a moment, you weren’t sure if the word existed that you wanted to use to describe it. “Wonderful, more than wonderful, I’m not sure how to describe it.”

 “It was wonderful.” He says. “No words can explain what I’m feeling right now.” You nod your head agreeing with him, you take in a deep breath before reaching for your shirt.

“I should go take a shower.” You say while pulling your shirt on. “And you should do the same.” He softly chuckles and nods his head before standing up, you glance at your panties before looking up at him. “Keep my panties safe, if you dare show it to anyone…”

“Why would I want to show anyone?” He asks as he hands you your pants. “It’ll be our secret.” You slightly falter at the word secret, did he want to keep you a secret or what had been done in the barn a secret? You stood from the blanket and took your pans from him and pulled them on.

“Yeah.” You mumble, trying to keep your tone even and not give away that was something was wrong. “Our secret.” You pull at your shirt before looking around, you pick up your bra and looks at him as he pulled his jeans on. “I uh, I’ll see you later.” You quickly exit the stables and made your way back to your house, you step inside and goes to your bedroom, quickly discarding your clothes again and tossing them into the laundry basket as you enter the bathroom, your thoughts were moving a million miles an hour.

‘Did he not want it to happen again? Was he embarrassed it had happened? Maybe he doesn’t feel the same way… maybe he had something else in mind… not what I had in mind, why is liking someone so damn hard?’

You stood underneath the water watching it hit your skin before sliding down and hitting the tiled shower floor, you didn’t move, you felt too drained from your thoughts consuming you, but you willed yourself to do it, you had to clean yourself after what happened in the stables.

“Wait… in the stables!” You suddenly say as your eyes widen, you would be taking somebody to that same place tomorrow for them to examine your horses. “Oh no… no.” You bring your hands up to your face. “Shit, shit.” That thought had given you the energy you needed to wash yourself, you needed to get clean and go think about things clearly, ‘They’d never know what you and Taehyung did there… right?’ “Hmph.” You huff as you step out of the shower after washing away the sweat, dirt along with the reminder of what you had done just moments ago, however, the tingles on your skin remained, where he had touched you remained, it was almost like it was embedded into your skin. “Stop it, stop it, stop it right now, we need to focus… Tomorrow… Oh, gosh.”

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You nervously guide the woman to the stables with a nervous smile on your lips, the only thing on your mind was Taehyung’s hands on your body, you enter the stables and your eyes immediately goes to the spot where it had happened only to find the spot empty, no blanket insight and his bag were hanging on a hook on the wall, he was on the other side of the stables, working with one of the ponies.

“These three are currently the only ones that I’m willing to sell, to a good home of course.” You say as you stop in front of the stalls. “They’re young and well-trained.” You explain to the woman, she carefully looks at the three horses. “If it’s for a child, then this one would be best. “ You say as you move towards the middle stall. “She’s a sweetheart and doesn’t seem to mind sudden outbursts if a child screams or becomes loud.” She nods her head, listening intently as you explained. “If you’re looking for a horse that you can ride in competition, then this one will be the best option.” You turn to the third stall. “But I can’t promise that he’s fast, but I do know that he’s good with his jumps.”

“And this one?” She asks, you move to the first stall and looks at the horse before turning to the woman.

“He's a little bit older and gets startled by any kind of screaming, I don’t recommend that he’s put near anyone that’s loud or screams often.” You explain. “But he’s a good runner and jumper.” She nods her head. “But I can’t confidently say that you can take him to a competition because of all the loud noises and things that could scare him, I recommend him for someone that just wants to go on a calm ride around their place.”

“You have some large stalls for them.” The woman states as she looks at the sizes of the stalls, each horse had a space large enough for them to walk around and lay down.

“How would you feel if you only had enough space to stand and turn around in?” You ask. “These beautiful animals deserve space, lots of it to move around and feel comfortable enough in it.” The woman nods her head.

“You seem to be the only person for miles that actually care about her animals.” She says. “I’ve been to five other places and each stall was just too small.” You frown hearing that, you knew people were cruel, but always hearing about it angered you. “I’m going to go think about it, but I think I’ll take this one.” The woman moves to the first stall. “This one would be perfect, I just want to go on peaceful rides and admire the scenery when the sun rises or sets.” You nod your head.

“Would you like a closer look?” You ask, the woman nods her head, you open the stall door and enter it. “Come on in.” The woman carefully enters the stall while looking around cautiously before relaxing and moving towards the chestnut coloured horse. “Did someone recommend my farm to you?”

“Yes.” She says. “Someone had bought a horse from you and told me how thorough you are.” You nod your head. “And I completely understand that you have to be thorough, you need to be sure that you’re selling your animals to the right person, into a good environment for them.”

“I’m glad you understand that.” You say. “So if you’re considering buying him, I will be making a trip to your home to be sure.” The woman nods her head.

“I understand.” She says. “I do think I will take him though, but I first need to build and set up a proper place for him to stay in.” You nod your head while rubbing along the horse’s neck, the woman carefully touches the horse before rubbing down his back. “I will let you know when it’s finished, but I need to go think carefully about buying him, it’s a big financial decision.”

“Of course.” You say. “It’s a big decision and a big responsibility as well, so take your time.” You glance towards Taehyung as he guides the pony back to its stall.

“Thank you.” The woman says as you exit the stall, you close the stall door and begin leading the woman out of the stables, you could feel eyes on you, you glance over your shoulder and saw Taehyung looking at you as he rubbed the pony’s head, you look away as you exit the stables and follow the woman to her car. “I will be in contact with you soon.”

“I look forward to hearing from you.” You say, the woman climbs into her car and starts the engine before rolling the window down.

“Thank you for taking the time to show them to me.” She says. “Have a wonderful day.”

“Have a wonderful day too.” You say and watch the woman drive off, leaving your farm, you turn around and look at the stables before going the opposite way to Waffles’s pen to go and talk to him and watch him play, you lean against the gate and watch him run around and jump up and down from the seesaw that was installed for him. “Maybe I should just go talk to him about it…” It had been eating away at your mind since you had left the stables yesterday, you had given yourself a headache from all the thinking and possible scenarios. “Dammit, I should just go talk to him… get it out and clear everything up.” The only response that you got was a loud ‘baaah’ from Waffles as he ran around, making you chuckle. “I’ll bring you some treats tomorrow when I come and visit you.”

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A few more days passed before you finally decided it was time to talk to him about what he had said, you approach the stables and step inside the building and saw him using a pitchfork to gather all the hay and straw, sweat already coated his honey-toned skin from the heat inside the stables and the summer sun beating down on earth, you had to fight the urge to bite your bottom lip, you make your way up to him, nervously biting the inside of your cheek.

“Do you want to go for a ride?” You ask as you stop behind him, he turns around to face you. “We need to talk so it would be nice if you want to go for one.” He puts the pitchfork to the side.

“I think so also.” He says. “It feels like you’ve been avoiding me ever since we had sex over there.” He points to the spot where it had happened, you don’t bother turning to look at the spot. “Did I do something wrong?”

“Let’s go on a ride first then we’ll talk.” You say. “We’re going to the meadow, and then we’ll talk there.” He only nods his head as he goes and retrieves a horse for himself from one of the stalls, you do the same before going into the small shed inside the stables and retrieved the equipment you would need, you saddle up before returning to the shed and picking up a rolled-up blanket, you return to the horse and attach the blanket to the saddle, you lead the horse out of the stables and climbs on and wait for Taehyung to join you outside, it only took another minute before he leads the other horse outside and climbed on, you leave the stables and rode to the meadow, neither of you saying a word to each other.

You arrive at the meadow and climb off your horse and leads him to a large tree and ties the reins to a branch near the water underneath the shades, you take the blanket you had brought along and walk down the stream, Taehyung ties the other horse’s reins to another branch near your horse before following behind you, you stop underneath another large tree and throws the blanket open before taking a seat on it, he sits down next to you, and you look over at the stream, at the rippling water as it flows to its final destination.

“Are you going to tell me what I did wrong?” He asks while staring at you, you turn your body to face him. “I mean… I thought you felt the same way.” You meet his eyes, his searching yours for answers. “Or was I wrong?”

“What do…. You said after we finished…” You begin only to stop to take in a deep breath. “That it would be our secret.” You glance to the side to look at the water. “And that hurt me when you said that.” You look back at him. “This talk is long overdue, I should have spoken o you as soon as you said it, but…” You trail off.

“But?” He asks wanting to know what stopped you from talking to him about how you felt.

“I wasn’t sure what you meant by, that it will be our secret.” You say. “What we did in the stables or us…?” You think carefully about your next words. “What are we after that?” Taehyung turns his body to face you. “Because over the past year and months I’ve developed deep feelings for you, I like you, and I’m certain about that, but after what you said…” He leans closer and brings one of his hands to your cheek, carefully caressing it.

“Hey, Hey, I get it now.” He softly says. “When I said it would be our secret, I meant what had happened in the stables, what we did would stay between us, but us… I like you very much.” It felt like your heart fluttered and butterflies almost formed in the pit of your stomach, your body froze at his words. “So I became concerned when you started to avoid me, if I had known that, that was the cause…” He softly chuckles while shaking his head. “I would have approached you sooner, so we could have talked it out.” His fingers move into your hair, pushing them out of your face. “I could have done this sooner.” He leans closer, your eyes fall shut as his lips touch yours, you lean into the kiss, tasting his lips, his forehead touches yours, and you begin smiling into the kiss as you feel the heat from him, you move one hand to his shirt and curl your fingers around the fabric, holding onto him as if he would disappear right in front of you, afraid that you were dreaming about his confession, but the way his lips felt against yours, you were certain that it wasn’t a dream.

You break the kiss, breathing hard as your eyes remain shut, taking a moment to appreciate each other’s presence, the surrounding sound was the leaves moving and the water stream following not far from you along with birds chirping in a nearby tree, the coolness from the wind blew against you, ensuring you that you were awake, and it wasn’t a dream.

“So will you keep coming to see me every day now?” He whispers, his lips almost touching yours, that was how close you were still to him. “I missed you in the stables.” You open your eyes and saw his dark brown eyes staring into yours. “Or are you going to make me wait longer before you drop by again?” You slightly lean away from him.

“I really thought that you didn’t feel the same way.” You say as you release his shirt, you press your hand flat against his chest.

“I feel the exact same way.” He says while leaning closer, he uses his other hand to guide you to lay back on the blanket, your eyes never leaving his as he leans over you. “I’ve felt like that for months now, and finally was able to act on it a week ago.” His hand on your cheek softly moves through your hair, his fingers brushing through the locks, he repeats the movement. “I want to keep confessing it over and over to be sure that you will show up at the stables every day without a worry.” His hand moves back to your cheek, his thumb gently brush over your cheek as he leans closer. “I want you.” His eyes flicker towards your lips before he looked back into your eyes. “In every single way, I want all of you, the vulnerable parts, the strong parts.” His eyes move back to your lips. “The flawless, the flawed, the perfections, the imperfections.”

“You’re becoming cheesy right now.” You mutter as you move your other hand to his shoulder, the one his chest slides up to his shoulder also. “It really sounds more like you want something else right now.” He softly chuckles and shakes his head.

“I’m just listing everything off that I want from you.” He says. “When I say that I want you, I mean that I want all of you.” He takes in a deep breath. “In every single way.” His hand that had been on your shoulder after he had guided you to lay down moves to your waist. “And I mean every single word right now.” He lowers his forehead to lean it against yours. “As long as you accept me in every single way with my flaws and my imperfections.” You nod your head as your lips part. “Do you?”

“I do.” You whisper, his lips brush over yours, the kiss feeling more intense than before, his hand on your waist rubbed soft circles on the fabric of your shirt, you start rubbing his shoulders as the kiss becomes deeper and more heated, his tongue swipes over your bottom lip before he took it between his lips and gently started sucking on it, his hand moves from your cheek to the blanket to support his weight, his other hand slider underneath your shirt and moves up along your skin leaving a burning trail behind, his hand stops on your ribcage and trace circles with his thumb, he releases your bottom lip and kiss along your jaw down your neck, stopping just above your collarbone.

“Can I?” His voice was husky as he spoke. “I need you to say it this time.” He lifts his head to look at you, you look at him with half-lidded eyes. “Am I allowed?”

“Yes, yes.” You say. “Please, yes.” Your tone almost begging him, it wasn’t that different from last time, but it felt slower and more passionate than the last time, he was making sure it was all right with you and that you were more comfortable with what he was doing, you were in control last time with some help from him when you rode him, but it seemed like he wanted to take the lead this time, his hand moves to cup your tit through your bra and squeezes it, those sculpted hands of his seemed to fit perfectly on your chest, it felt like he was giving you a massage, he could feel your breast swelling the more he massaged it, the more he played with it, he could feel the texture of the bra as he slides his hand up and down, the fabric rubs against your nipple causing it to harden and become erect, he leans down and moves his head to the side of yours.

“Do you want me to remove your shirt?” He softly asks making sure that his lips were brushing over your earlobe. “Do you want me to remove your bra and touch your tits in such a way that you might just reach your high from it?” His words made you shiver and caused your clit to twitch, he hadn’t had the chance to properly touch your chest yet, and you had no idea if he would be capable of doing that to you.

“Yes.” You breathe out, your breath hits his neck causing something to awaken inside him, you bend your leg as he moves over the other leg that was still laying extended on the blanket, his hand retreats from your shirt and moves to the hem of it, he sits on his knees, his leg between you forcing you to spread your legs wider, his other hand moves to the hem also and begins lifting it, you grip at his shoulders and pull yourself upright into a sitting position to make it easier for him to remove the fabric, your bent leg extends out into a more comfortable position, he drops the shirt next to you before his hand touched your skin and slides to your back and towards the clasp of the bra, his touch felt warm on your skin, the feathery touch of his fingers touched your skin as he fumbles with the clasp before it unhooked and sprung loose, he buries his face in the crook of your neck and place kisses along the skin as his hands rub your back. “They feel so warm…” You whisper into his ear, lips brushing over the lobe. “Your hands on my skin.” The touch felt more comforting as his hand slides up and down your back, he wanted to take his time with you.

“You deserve a comforting touch when we’re doing this, when things get heated.” He mutters into your skin just below your ear, you could feel your heart swell at his words. “To fully experience and feel everything.“ His hands move to your waist before slowly moving up your sides and under your arms before hooking his fingers around the bra straps, he slowly pulls them down your arms before moving away from your neck to completely remove the fabric, he drops it on top of your shirt next to you and leans back on his knees to get a better view you, his eyes slowly move from your eyes down to your lips down to your neck before stopping on your chest, you lean back placing your hands behind you on the blanket. “I can’t believe I didn’t get to appreciate you last time. “He leans closer before looking up at you, sweat was forming on his skin and some of his hair was starting to stick to his forehead. “But I’ll make sure to do that now.” His lips touch your collarbone before leaving a trail down to your sternum, his hands moving to the side of your chests, cupping your breast from the side. “We won’t be disturbed here right?” He suddenly stops, his lips hovering just above your left breast.

“No one knows about this place.” You say. “Except for us, we won’t be disturbed here and there’s no rush either.” That was all he needed to hear for him to part his lips and slip his tongue past them before pressing it flat against your skin, he licks a stride towards your nipple and circles his tongue around the bud causing it to harden and become erect like the right nipple, the feeling of his warm wet tongue on your skin caused bumps to form on your skin as the wind blew against it. “Shit.” His lips wrap around the bud and begin sucking on it, his tongue rubbed over it adding to the pleasure you were already feeling, you bring one hand to the back of his head and entangles your fingers into his hair, your fingers rub his scalp as he sucks on your nipple, your lips part as you heavily breathe out. “Gosh… how… how can you… it feels so good.” His fingers knead into the side of your breasts. “How is… is this…” You take in a deep breath. “Possible.” You breathe out. “How can it feel this good…” Your eyes fall shut and your senses take over.

Your fingers continue to rub his scalp while pushing his head closer to your chest, hoping for more pleasure, hoping to feel more, but he resisted it, his nose was already brushing over your skin and the sound of his breathing against your skin reached your ears, he releases your nipple and your grip on the back of his head loosens, he pulls away from the bud and your eyes fly open to watch him, you saw a silver string of saliva glint in the light as he moves away from you before it disappeared, his fingers keep kneading into the side of your chest, feeling the soft flesh underneath his touch, he looks at the swollen and erect bud before he leans closer again and kisses the sternum, you lay back and watch him as his head moves from your sternum to your ribs before moving over your stomach, his lips move over your exposed skin, kissing over some of your faded scars and the ones that were still noticeable.

“I hope I can catch you each time you fall.” He says as he looks up at you, your chest rose up and down from your breathing. “I don’t like seeing you hurt or too many of these.” His fingers trace over some of the faded scars, he had learned how clumsy you were over the past year he has worked for you, he had the shock of his life when it happened the first time, he had freaked out as soon as he saw you on the ground, but as the months passed he quickly learned to move everything out of the way that could be in the way, and if it did happen, he would immediately be by your side to offer help. “And if I can’t, I’m sorry.” You begin shaking as you laugh, both your hands move to cover your face.

“I’m— haha— I’m sorry— haha.” You manage to get out between laughter. “I don’t— haha— don’t know what to— haha— to say.” You move your hands away from your face. “Gosh, you don’t have to— haha.” He couldn’t help but laugh along, he lowers his head down against your stomach, the vibrations from his laughing tickling your stomach. “Oh my— haha.” He lifts his head to look at you, you move your hands to cup his face, your laughter slowly dying down. “You don’t have to catch me, at least not every time.” Your thumbs gently rub circles on his cheeks. “I need to see if you can help clean any wounds if I get some.” His hands move to cover yours and gently moves them away from his face.

“I’ll try my best, but I can’t promise anything.” He says before kissing your knuckles on both hands, he releases your hands and moves his leg away from between yours and sits on his knees next to you, his hands goes down to your pants along with his gaze, he quickly unbuttons and unzips it before reaching for the band, his fingers curl around it. “Lift your hips a little for me.” You bend your knees and press your heels into the ground, you lift your hips high enough for him to remove your pants, you lower your hips once they reach your knees and extend your legs allowing him to remove your pants, he stops at your ankles and quickly removes your shoes and socks before discarding your pants, he places his hands on your ankle and slowly slides his hands upwards, making sure to move his hands over each part of your leg to feel all of you, his hands reach the back of your knee and stops. “Can I?” His thumbs circled the skin on the side of your knee with a feathery touch.

“Yes.” You say as you keep your eyes on him. “You keep asking me today, is there a reason?”

“I want to be sure that you want this.” He says. “Want me to do this.” One hand moves up the side of your thigh while the other one stayed in place behind your knee. “Last time felt almost rushed, I want to take my time today.” His hand moves to the top of your thigh before moving to the inside, his palm lifts from your skin and his fingers graze over your skin before reaching your panties, his fingers trace over the panties along your folds, excitement rushes through you at his touch, you could feel yourself growing wetter at the feathery touch tracing your pussy. “Your panties are already soaked.” You felt yourself becoming wet when he was sucking on your nipple, kneading the side of your chest, you only had sex once, and it already seemed like he had your body figured out, where to touch when to touch, and how to touch.

“Aah.” You breathe out at the sensation, you couldn’t describe the feeling that you were experiencing with his fingers tracing over your panties, you could feel the trace of his finger moving up and down and from side to side, purposely brushing over the inside of your thighs. “If I didn’t want this then I wouldn’t be here.” Your skin felt flushed with heat, he moves your panties to the side and slides his fingers up and down your folds. “Tae…”

“I like it when you say my name like that.” He says and slips the tips of his fingers between your folds, he strokes along your soaked folds coating his fingers with your wetness. “Let’s get rid of these, they’re just in the way now.” He moves his fingers away from your wetness and moves his hands to the band of your panties, his fingers curl around the elastic. “Lift.” You bend your knees once again and lift your hips slightly before lowering them down when he had pulled the panties down to your knees, you extend your legs as you felt his knuckles brush along your legs before he removed the piece of soaked fabric, he drops it on the pile of clothes forming next to you on the blanket, his hand immediately going to your mound and moves his fingers back to your folds.

“Hm.” You hum at the feeling forming in your abdomen, it felt like everything moved to the centre of your stomach and formed a knot of ecstasy, his fingers slip past your folds and move towards your sensitive nub that was begging to be touched and paid attention to, his fingers part as he nears the nub and slides them past the nub only rubbing the sides of it. “Oh.” He trails his fingers along your folds before moving them back to your clit, watching your reaction as he slides them over your nub. “Shit…” You could feel your breathing becoming heavier at his touch, his fingers seemed to reach every part of your folds as he strokes them, barely giving your clit attention.

“You’re going to be a sopping mess before I'm even inside you, angel.” He says while rubbing around your clit, only brushing the sides of it making it swell.

“Touch it, touch it, don’t tease me.” You say becoming frustrated, his fingers pressed against your clit. “OOH!” A loud gasp escapes from your lips and your back arches from the ground before lowering back down. “Fuck that felt good.” He rubs your clit, heat spreads through your body and a thin layer of sweat forms on your skin. “Don’t— oh— stop.” His other hand slides over your thigh and presses down on the skin, he takes your clit between his forefinger and thumb and gently rolls the nub between his fingers. “Fuck… Tae.” Pleasure courses through you, a tension slowly forms in your abdomen as he continues to roll the nub between the pads of his fingers.

“Keep moaning my name like that, angel.” He says. “You sound so beautiful when you moan my name.” He moves between your legs and leans down, he places a kiss on the inside of your thigh as he releases your clit, you let out a sigh before your body tensed when you felt a finger slip inside your sopping hole, he curls his finger and slightly twists it.

“Taehyung!” You loudly say his name as you felt his finger rub against your walls. “Shit.” He extends his finger and pulls it out halfway, the sound of your wetness reaches your ears before feeling the wind blow against your soaked pussy, you shiver with pleasure at the feeling, your toes curling for a second before uncurling, your hands move to the blanket and grip it between your fingers.

“Relax your muscles.” His voice was soft as he spoke. “It’ll feel better when you relax into it.” You take in a deep breath before releasing it, relaxing your muscles, you feel another finger slip into you. “That’s better, angel.” He turns his fingers inside you. “Tell me when I do something you’re not comfortable with.” He spreads his fingers inside you, using a scissoring motion to stretch your walls, he turns and twists his fingers inside you.

“TAE!” You scream as his fingers brush over the most sensitive spot inside you, your toes curl in pleasure as he continued twisting and turning them inside you. “Tae… Tae…” You could feel the tension become tighter and tighter, your legs starting to shake as your high approaches.

“You’re close, aren’t you?” He asks as he adds a third finger, he pumps them in and out of you, his other hand slides from your thigh to your mound and covers it before he slipped his thumb down to your clit, circling it before rubbing the sensitive nub.

“Oh… aah… Tae… Tae.” You whimper out, his fingers continuously brush against that spot inside you. “Tae… Tae.” You could feel the blanket starting to stick to your back from all the sweat as your body starts to shake with pleasure. “Close… I’m close.” You manage to whimper out, it felt like you were about to burst with pleasure. “Fuck… Taehyung.” He curls his fingers inside you and presses his thumb against your clit. “TAE!” Your mind becomes clouded with lust as your eyes fall shut, stars appearing behind your eyelids as the tension exploded inside you and pleasure washes over you, your muscles twitching as you release around his finger.

“So damn beautiful.” He mutters to himself, you couldn’t hear a word from him during your high, his fingers slowly pumps in and out of you, his thumb circles around your clit easing you through your high, your eyes slowly open, still in a daze you stare up at the branches above you, his fingers slips out from you as he still watches you as your senses slowly return to you, his eyes move down to your soaked hole and saw your wetness leaking from it. “I can’t wait to fill you with my cock again, to feel you wrapped around me again.” He moves onto his knees and reaches for the buttons on his shirt, you quickly sit upright and reach for them.

“Let me…” You say as you look at him, he lifts his head and meets your eyes, they were darker than usual. “I want to undress you.” Your hands quickly undo the buttons on his button-up, your knuckles brushing against his skin every few seconds, you reach up and grip the fabric near the collar and pulls it down his shoulders revealing his tones chest and honeyed skin, you discard the shirt and drops it on top of your pile of clothes, you place your hands on his shoulders and slides them down his chest and stomach, Taehyung felt a shiver run up his spine from your touch, your hands stop at his jeans and begin fiddling with the button, you pop it open and move to the zipper, clearly seeing the tent that was forming, or trying to form in his jeans, he lifts his hips, and you pull his jeans down, your eyes watch as the bulge becomes larger after being freed from the jeans, he moves away from between your legs and sits down next to you, you watch as he quickly gets rid of his shoes and socks before removing his jeans and underwear.

“Fuck.” He mutters as he wraps a hand around himself. “Fuck, I didn’t bring any protection.” You move closer to him and wrap your hand around his cock below his hand, his lips parts, and he lets out a sigh of relief at your touch. “Shit.” His hand falls away from his cock, and you begin moving your hand up and down his length, remembering the feeling from the last time, the veins on his cock felt familiar underneath your touch.

“It’s okay.” You say as you stared at the head of his cock, clear liquid leaking from it and coating the tip, you swipe your thumb over the head.

“Aah.” He gasps from the sensation of your finger moving over the sensitive tip, you move your hand up and down collecting the clear liquid and spreading it over his length. “What do you…” He stops as he sucks in a deep breath. “Mean that it’s okay?” His mind was flooded with lust, but he needed to know what you meant, you lean closer to him, your lips reaching his earlobe.

“Cum inside me.” You whisper into his ear, your lips brushing over his lobe, his eyes widen, and he swallows. “And yes I’m sure.” You twist your hand around his length, his jaw slacks before he licks his bottom lip.

“Lay down.” He says in what sounded like a demanding tone, you release his cock and lays back, he moves to hover over you and reaches for his cock, his hand wraps around his member and guides himself to your soaking heat, he coats himself with your wetness, making sure to rub the head over your clit. “Fuck… so good.” He moves his cock to your entrance and inserts the tip inside you, you spread your legs wide before hooking your ankles together behind his back, your lips part and your eyes squeeze shut as you feel his cock stretch and fills you.

“Ooh— Aah.” You gasp and throw your arms around him, your hands rests on his shoulder blades, your fingers slightly digging into his skin, he leans down pressing his chest against yours and his lips brush over yours, capturing your soft moans and whimpers in his mouth, you squeeze your legs around him as you tried to close them from the pleasure, his hands were firmly pressed into the ground below your arms as he sinks into you as deep as the position would allow him, he comes to a halt when his pubic bone touches your mound, he breaks the kiss and lays his forehead against yours, you slowly open your eyes to look into his.

“This position isn’t working for me.” He mutters, you could feel that he wasn’t fully inside you like he was when you were riding him. “Hold on tight, unhook your ankles.” Your hands clasp behind his head as he shifts his weight to his knees, his hands move to your waist and firmly grips onto your hips as he moves his head away from yours, you unhook your ankles from around his waist and turns you over letting you be on top, his cock sinks deeper into you before he sits upright.

“HOLY FUCK!” You moan loudly as you feel his pubic bone rub against your clit and feel him slip in deeper. “Oh, my fucking… fuck.” His hands stay on your hips, his head moves to the crook of your neck as neither of you moves, he could feel your walls lightly pulsing around his cock.

“I’m going to be ruined before we even get started properly.” He says into your skin, you unclasp your hands and move one hand into his hair to hold the back of his head. “Are you… comfortable?” His mind was going completely crazy with you wrapped around him, you begin rocking your hips into his, causing his pubic bone to stimulate your clit.

“Oh… ah, ah, Hm…” You whimper into his ear with each rock of your hips, you could feel his breathing becoming heavier against your neck.

“Aah… Fuck, angel… aah... [Y/n].” He whimpers into your skin, the muscles in his thighs contracting underneath you. “Angel…” His moans sounded so beautiful to listen to as you rocked your hips into his, your grip tightens in his hair from the pleasure.

“Tae… Mhm.” You moan as you tilt your head slightly back, your eyes closing in bliss, one of his arms wrap around your waist and pulls you closer to him. “Tae… Tae.” Your moans became more breathy as you rolled your hips, your other hand presses against his back, your fingers digging into his skin, he lifts his head from your neck and brushes his lips over your earlobe.

“[Y/n]… oh… aah, hm.” He whimpers into your ear, you could feel your clit twitch at the sound of him whimpering your name, whimpering into your ear because of you. “You feel so good around me, taking me so well, angel.” He was whispering into your ear, grunt in between his words, he moves his head away from your ear, you lower your head and lays your forehead against his, you open your eyes to look into his, the intimacy growing between you.

“Shit… Tae… Taehyung.” You moan, tension building up in your abdomen, the sound of your wetness moving reached your ears, you could barely hear the sound of the water flowing, the wind blowing against your sweat-covered skin did nothing to cool it down, it felt like fire was coursing through your veins, your breathing was almost in-sync with his as you gazed into each other’s eyes.

“[Y/n]… fuck… I’m close.” He mutters, you could feel his cock twitch inside you. “I’m close… you feel so good.” Your walls clench around him at the thought of him releasing inside you, and at the sound of your name falling from his lips. “[Y/n]…”

“Taehyung... Tae, OH!” You moan as you feel him turning you over again, your back touches the blanket and your hand releases the back of his head as both your hands move to the blanket, he moves his away from your forehead and moves onto his knees, he hooks the back of your knees with his elbows and lifts your legs, almost pressing them into your torso, he snaps his hips into you. “TAE, OH FUCK, TAE!” He continues to roll his hips into yours, his arm moves around your leg as he moves his hand to your abdomen before moving it lower.

“You feel so good angel… are you close?” He asks, his cock twitches inside you as your walls squeeze around him, his hand reaches your clit and begins rubbing the sensitive nub.

“Tae… Tae… fuck… close.” You whimper out, he could feel your body shaking as he rolled his hips into you, your eyes shut as the tension suddenly snaps inside you, fireworks seem to go off behind your lids as pleasure washes over you. “TAEHYUNG!” He could feel you releasing around him, the feeling of your release surround him became too much, he thrust into you one more time and felt a burst of energy in his cock before he reaches his high and released inside you.

“[Y/N]!” His moan was loud as pleasure bursts through him, his mind was clouded with pleasure as he gently rocks his hips into you to ride out your orgasms, his fingers halt on your clit before lowering your legs and unhooks his arms from them, his cock slips out from you causing the mixtures of your orgasms to leak from you. “Fuck.” He moves away from between your legs and lays down on the blanket next to you, both of you breathing hard as your senses slowly return to you, as you slowly come down from the high you just experienced.

━━━━━━♡♥♡━━━━━━

Another year almost passes since that moment in the meadow happened, and you’ve only grown closer and closer to him, every other night he could be over for dinner and help out as much as he could with the preparation, but he had proved that he was better with horses than in the kitchen, which was not a problem, because he made up for his lack of cooking by making the best-tasting tea for you to drink, usually during or after dinner when you would be sitting on the couch enjoying each other’s company or watching television.

Just like right now, nightfall had covered the sky and twinkling stars covered the darkened night sky, the TV was playing some movie, but neither of you was paying attention to it, Terry and Yeontan were on the couch with you and Taehyung while Pizzie was laying on the floor next to the couch, fast asleep, they had played in the water all day and had tired themselves out from all the playing.

“I’m going to go make us some tea.” He says as he turns his head to look at you, he lifts your hand that he was holding and brings it to his lips and kisses your knuckles. “I love you.” The words fall from his lips, your body freezes at those three words, those words that were so endlessly tossed around by countless people, you had hoped that one day when someone did say those words to you that they would mean it and not just say it because they wanted to, or because they thought you wanted to hear them, but now hearing them come from him after almost three years of knowing and getting to know him more, your heart fluttered, and it felt like the air in your lungs disappeared, your lips part as you try to get your brain to work again to respond to him, ‘Had he meant it? Or did he just say it because he felt like he needed to?’ So many questions ran through your mind, you wanted him to mean those words, to be sure that he does love you, before you could even ask him anything, he answered you as if reading your mind.

“I mean it.” He says. “I’m not saying it because I feel like I should, or I feel like it’s time, I’m saying it because…” He leans closer to you. “I love you, and I don’t expect you to say it back right away, if you still need more time to say it, take all the time you need if you want to be sure, but I’m certain.” You slowly nod your head and suck in a deep breath, realizing you had been holding it. “The tea isn’t going to make itself.” He stood from the couch and makes his way to the kitchen Yeontan jumps off the couch to follow him.

“If you’re sure about your feelings.” You say while standing up from the couch, he stops in his step and turns to you, you walk up to him and take hold of his hands. “I promised myself that I would only say those words if I mean them… and if I’m sure that the other person feels the same.”

“I don’t expect you to say it back.” He says. “It should come natural, so when you’re ready to say it… I’ll wait no matter how long, I will wait for you forever, [Y/n].”

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