#internet brainrot

[cat-appreciator]

An incredibly stupid phrase which just popped into my head fully formed like Artemis from the brow of Zeus:

“Shirepilled hobbitmaxxing”.

Why did my brain produce this deeply curséd pair of words? Who the fuck knows, not me.

I’m picturing Radagast the Brown (a man who has been known to indulge in the bounty of nature’s pharmacopeia) looking at Gandalf and saying “Dude, I think you’ve had enough pipeweed.”

[nebulousgaythoughts]

If you're the type of person to get mad that Chappell Roan won't take a photo with you

Please for the love of God ask yourself

Why do you need a photo with Chappell?

Why do you want a photo with Chappell?

Would that add value to your life?

Do you want the photo, or so you want to be able to tell people you took a photo with her?

Does any of that actually fucking matter?

[autisticexpression2]

The right thinks the left is full of wimpy crybabies, and the left thinks the same of the right. The problem is that they're both correct. There are whiny little bitches getting performatively worked up over nothing across the political spectrum, and they're the loudest voices on the internet. Tits out black trans women throwing bricks at cops aren't writing paragraphs about the fascist messages in Stephen Universe and old farmers who live in remote conservative communities don't make wojak memes about wokeness in video games.

[my-t4t-romance]

every time I see that "your attention span is now shorter than that of a goldfish/8 seconds!!" soundbite I get a little peeved, so here's an article I found that addresses all of my issues with it and actually called the alleged original source of that myth (spoiler: the bbc twisted his words for shock value). I had thought that it had been thrown around since 2015, but it actually goes back more than a decade before that!

I get that there's a lot of reasons to be anxious in the information age, and corporations absolutely do prioritize getting you to Buy Product (or at least convincing their investors that you will) over your mental health, but your attention span (however that's quantified) is not similar to that of a goldfish. just because it's scary doesn't mean it's true. on a related note, if someone's peddling the idea that humanity's on a rapid decline, particularly if they mention the word "degeneration," you might wanna make a strategic exit.

[dragomer]

for people who aren't completely gone from online brainrot, your account is pretty disgusting omg i can't believe that i just got jumpscared by a nasty ass blog at 20 years old💀 i really hope you're some old man because otherwise it would be really sad... did you know there's professionals for people like you? get help!!

...The fact that you managed to insult yourself like that at 20 years old is worrying, I think your caretaker should monitor you internet access more.

My blog being disgusting to people who haven't freed themselves from online brainrot is supposed to matter because?

Dude, you haven't been jumpscared by anything, all my posts are tagged and my ships are in my description, you literally clicked on it knowing full well what you were gonna see.

Your fap remorse isn't my responsibility and I don't want to engage in your GILF kink, sorry.

You mean the professionals who classify YOUR behavior as a mental illness while what I do as long been classified perfectly fine?

Thanks for the ask ^^

[boop-le-snoot]

Can an appropriate professional please chime in on the tampon+lead thing that has been going around because I looked at the actual research and the contamination quantity equals to that of literally everything else we have in our everyday lives. I work with research and data and the first article that reported about this, that I was able to find (about a week ago), was exceptionally sensationalist and all the other reporters just ran with it.

Lead has been around since ancient Rome and traces of it can be found in literally anything, all across the world, not just in America and Europe. IMO the ruckus and the panic is absolutely unhinged. The variety of other chemicals that I saw in rhe research article seem to be coming mostly from dyes and processing cotton, as well as additives to increase absorbency & to keep the fibres together. Again, not seeing a reason for panic here.

[watchagonnado]

I'm like 96% sure this would actually work

i would make jeremy fragrance fall in love with me and then i would start having "attacks" of a mysterious illness and pay someone to pretend to be a doctor who tells jeremy that im allergic to alcohol and certain essential oils he needs to stop wearing perfume or i could die and then when he doesnt stop i fake my death and reappear to him as a ghost so he gets scared prays to god for salvation and i run off in a plume of smoke so he thinks it works and so he decides to become a monk and devote himself to god forever and then while hes in the monastery he realizes hes gay and runs off to live with another monk in the alps

[tisajest]

People get weirdly nationalistic over the stupidest shit istg

[rowansinjune]

Drunkenly ranting about the linguistics of brainrot speak in discord chat

[fuzzyspiderpawz]

the horrible curse that haunts me is every time I see a reblog by the haiku bot I read it in the voice of jacksfilms

you don’t know true suffering like I do

[wrong-turn-ronald]

Love that for him

I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby

[kyliafanfiction]

The Internet 'is' rotting brains?

No, the internet rotted all brains ages ago. No one who has ever been online in any capacity has a brain now, just a little guy in a control room in their head pushing buttons.

[rogerwatersreal]

Can this Pink Floyd yaoi trans shit stop.

[eccedeus]

Viral food hack! Watch how this 10 year old went viral! How to hack happiness! Viral depression hack! Top ten ways to buy more things to make you more productive to stop killing yourself!!!

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

babygirl your critical thinking skills

[unorganisedalienrubbish]

Presenting Wonder-Bed