#internet unfucker

[write-it-motherfuckers]

[contentment-of-cats]

Of course it's a Microsoft update

These updates have been a crapshoot since Windows 98. I can't remember how many times I've had to unfuck a computer.

[aria0fgold]

Tumblr users flocking to the next best alternative the moment dashboard unfucker dies should already be a telltale sign just HOW BAD the site design has been.

[krownest]

someone being normal about dashboard unfucker not working

[ashtonisvibing]

okay cool good to know that tumblr did something to the website that's broken the dashboard unfucker, and since the creator of that isn't on tumblr because this website is transphobic as hell, it's not getting fixed

what if i just left

[junipercalle]

Fixed my dash via Stylus, so I'm back with a navigable and non-overstimulating Tumblr. It's amazing how little time you spend on a site when its interface is just intolerable.

Meanwhile, in other news, you might want to donate to the Internet Archive, and (if you are a letter-writing sort) maybe consider making your support of it known. A place to post cultural records and non-conformative, anti-authoritarian things is invaluable. We live in times. What you can do, please do.

[krockat]

oh my goshl....... to the depths of the editing mines i go again......,

GAAAAAAAAAURGH

GAAAAAAH

GAH GAH GAH

Y'AAAAAH

,,,,,,

so..... i wanted to edit a short video. its true, i did. so instead of purchasing or subscribing to yet another program for a kindling hobby i looked up free editing software. but i needed to get it Quick and Without Much Thought - cause my hands were Oh so hungry to edit the thing i'd filmed for this specific project today,

Now

aaand so i picked the top placement of a top twelve best free editing programs of 2023

(can you count the potential pitfalls of mistakes in this one sentence?)

and so. i clicmked it and wow! in browser!! thats great.

opened it up and:

wow! its easy to understand,

it reminds me of old programs i used before way back,

and its just. intuitive user friendly enough,

but also with enough bigger boyer tools for me to work with, so i can feel like a bigger boy.

and yea, many features are paywalled, but theres cheaper and manual versions for all of them -

(and those features not being this i minded, i find manual subtitling for example to be kind of a fun and fulfilling problem.)

it was seeming. cool!

but. as i have now layed an hour or so on working on this progrem and project.... i realize to my intense fear and budding dissapointment........

Exporting is a premium feature.

meaning, Downloading, what i have created...................

I HAVE TO PAY FOR`?????????

I put all this time and effort and funny lil skibblywinklies and am now soulbound and connected to this project!!! to this piece ive created!!

with YOUR TOOLS and YOUR FEATURES THAT I MOLDED W MY HANDS THE SUPPLE CLAY OF MY PROJECT:........

and now, poor as i am today, i can not. get my project back. into my hands.

i am late on a bill i have not been able to pay.... and motherfucker you think i shall pay you 192 usd for a yearly subscription for the pro feature, or 24 usd a month with auto rescription for This? you think thats okay??? you cuck swiene???

you who were top 1 free program.

i shall do violence upon the world, instead of doing the violence upon me.

i shall not turn this pain inward. RAAAAUGH RAAAAAHGHRAAAAAAAAUGH uuuuuRAAAAAAAHGHGHGHGHGHHUUHHUHUGHUGHUGHHGHGHGHGHUHUHGUGHUGHUGHUGHGUHG .

why do every editing exploit i do end up in torture.....

[the-demoness-next-door]

what the FUCK did youtube do to their UI

[arolesbianism]

Hm. I am getting the distinct feeling that either revanced broke or some apps are doing smth real shitty

[write-it-motherfuckers]

[ms-demeanor]

i mean realistically many people do deserve to be the victims of targeted harassment campaigns. if you're being an asshole you deserve to be screamed at by everyone present until you stop. some people commit acts of cruelty and subsequently forfeit their reasonable right to participate in society until they've made amends.

the people of wendy's have a moral right to scream at the manager if said manager sprays them in the neck with milkshake every time they go to pick up their order

damn following up the last ask, ig it was someone in ur notes constructing an equivalence between @tting staff and getting nuked to yelling at a wendy's manager and getting kicked out. my bad lol thought that was part of ur main post

I mean this is something that's still worthwhile to bounce off of even though you're not actually responding to me.

First of all, no, I pretty much don't think that anybody deserves to be the focus of a targeted harassment campaign. At least not the kind that are spun up on tumblr or twitter. I generally think that targeted harassment campaigns don't work to change minds, they only work to torment, isolate, and attack people, which will often further entrench them in their positions.

Sometimes people doing serious antifascist work will make a discovery like, for instance "the principal of X school is a vicious antisemite" and will run an *exposure* campaign to get them removed from a position of power, but with very few exceptions when you see an online callout post for a random internet user it's nothing but abuse and an attempt to bully them off of a specific website, not an attempt to protect victims or inform people of a genuine threat. "ABC is the new alt of this person with a documented history of starting cults, DNI, block and move on" is very different than "This specific user who is on staff posts harry potter fanart and is why fascists continue to exist on tumblr, let's make sure they know what tumblr thinks of them."

You are trying to frame bullying campaigns as normal consequences for antisocial behavior, but the antisocial behaviors under discussion here are "user posted fanart broadly disliked by the community and associated with specific ideologies long after the initial fandoms were crystallized" and "is the CEO of a social media website that is implementing features that the users dislike."

"People deserve to be screamed at until they stop the bad behavior" is punitive and shitty and so broad and open to so many interpretations that you're basically saying "it's open season on screaming at people." I think that it's bad behavior to support neoliberal political candidates who prop up capitalism but it would be horrible for me to run harassment campaigns against everyone who says "vote blue no matter who" even though I think that attitude perpetuates real world harms. (And it also wouldn't convince those people to change their minds! The fact that I think they are doing something harmful doesn't give me the social license to send hundreds of people to harass them! And it wouldn't work! These kinds of campaigns don't effect change they just isolate people and erode trust and civility jesus fuck we need to be coalition building not posting callouts over whatever activity has been deemed "freak behavior" this week)

some people commit acts of cruelty and subsequently forfeit their reasonable right to participate in society until they've made amends.

oh buddy, I think I get where you're coming from here but considering the kinds of behavior under discussion this is just straight up fascist. You are literally saying that people should be banished from society for wrongthink because nobody under discussion here has actually committed an act of cruelty.

(one of the things that i'm putting under the heading of "tumblr conspiracist thinking" is "staff is currently and continually intentionally flagging certain LGBTQ tags and bloggers" - there is ample evidence that the current staff is working to unfuck flagging and blocked tags that was done long before this crew was working on it. People talk about "tumblr had to settle because their filtering disproportionately impacted lgbtq+ creators" and that is TRUE however that was a filter that was established under different owners with different policies and different staff; the implication that the current staff is guilty of trying to stifle LGBTQ+ content because a lawsuit started before the Automattic purchase of tumblr ended in a financial settlement is just bad, wrong, incorrect, faulty logic. And if I might indulge in a bit of my own conspiracist thinking: I actually suspect a lot of the flagging and tagging and blocking of trans women specifically might actually be targeted attacks of individual users by terfs - many of the things that are getting flagged as needing a community label are things that use tags that terfs follow to attack and if enough users click "this needs a community label" the post will get flagged - I don't know that that's what's going on but just operating on occam's razor I think it's a lot more likely that terfs are coordinating attacks on trans people than that there is a secret group of cryptoterfs on staff taking time out of their day to ensure that trans users get flagged, if only because I think that the vocally trans positive former members of the staff would have said something about it.)

So, given that my position is "it is unlikely that anyone on staff is intentionally targeting LGBTQ+ groups HOWEVER prior policies enacted harm against LGBTQ+ groups and there is visible evidence that the current staff is trying to repair that damage" I'm not seeing any behaviors here that call for individual employees or users to get targeted with harassment from thousands of users.

But anyway, back to the specifics of the ask:

some people commit acts of cruelty and subsequently forfeit their reasonable right to participate in society until they've made amends.

Do you have any idea how frequently amends are made and never circulated as widely as the callout post? Do you have any idea how frequently callout posts are incorrect, and exaggerate the things that need to be amended? I'm reminded of Lindsey Ellis, who was the victim of a years-long targeted harassment campaign and made multiple apologies over the years who was finally driven off of her primary platform because she carelessly misspoke and the people who had been targeting her for years were able to make a post that she had long disavowed and was a relic of her dealing with the aftermath of sexual violence go viral. The internet doesn't let people make amends; people see accusations. They see the first post, not the follow up. That's why starting these campaigns is shitty and dangerous even if you *personally* believe that you'll forgive an individual once they "make amends." (and the "amends" people usually demand are "i want this person gone from the internet forever and cut out of this part of their life" - that's not really something that's fair to ask of people when so much of the world is online these days.)

the people of wendy's have a moral right to scream at the manager if said manager sprays them in the neck with milkshake every time they go to pick up their order

No they don't. Straight up. If the manager of a wendy's sprays you in the neck with a milkshake you have the right to escalate your complaint right up the chain, take your business away and never come back, warn other people "hey the manager sprayed me with a milkshake, stay away," but you don't have the moral right to escalate the situation by screaming at them (and you certainly don't have that right if you happened to get sprayed with some milkshake while the manager was attempting to fix the frostee machine when you came to pick up your order, which I think is actually more analogous to what is happening here).

someone in ur notes constructing an equivalence between @tting staff and getting nuked to yelling at a wendy's manager and getting kicked out

A big point that I think you're missing here is that @-ing staff when there is a problem on a post or you see harassment is generally pretty acceptable (though much less effective than filing a support claim), but the issue under discussion isn't @-ing staff, it was pointing thousands of angry people at two specific people who are *part* of staff and holding those two individuals responsible for all the problems that users see with tumblr.

partyjockers got nuked because their post directed a flood of harassment at one staff member in a post where they had highlighted that user's URL and name:

This is explicitly saying "users like the one I screenshotted are the reason you're being attacked by terfs" because one member of staff posted fanart from two franchises that tumblr-the-userbase has deemed off limits.

(Do you have any idea how extreme a bubble this is? Do you walk into barnes and noble and sigh because the managers are fascists who want trans people dead because there's harry potter merch everywhere? JK rowling is a terf and a horrible fucking person and I am no longer personally comfortable engaging with that fandom but people posting fanart of a franchise are not personally attacking you even if it feels like they are disregarding your humanity; you cannot consider other people's participation in huge, popular, mainstream fandoms as a sign that they are plotting against you this is why i'm calling this conspiracist thinking the entire scorched earth conspiracy spawned from someone interpreting a staff member's art as esoteric signposts signalling their hatred of trans people. Do you remember when the stupid harry potter game came out and this entire website was despondent because it meant that people didn't care about trans people? That's not actually what it meant! What it meant is that the vast majority of people on the planet have neither a twitter nor a tumblr account and have no idea how shitty JK rowling is to trans people and they don't interpret "harry potter imagery" as "covert terf signal" they interpret it as "possibly the most mainstream fantasy series in the last fifty years")

This isn't someone calling out the manager after they spray you with a milkshake. The manager asking someone to leave after they started screaming that the cashier's earrings were hate speech.

This analogy got out of hand but please just understand that there's a difference between @-ing an account that people are paid to monitor as part of their jobs and that they have support and coworkers to help with and @-ing someone's personal account.

Nobody got a post deleted because the used @ staff, they got their posts deleted because they focused viral negative attention on individual users.

[the-muppet-joker]

Oh Mr. The Frog, who are the sexiest Labyrinth and Dark Crystal puppets respectively? I need to know.

How many times must I discuss my sexual interest in Hoggle before you Tumblrinas understand?

He is pissing in the first scene. Mmm, muppet piss, me likey!

He is shown to be pathetic throughout the entire film. I know Hoggle would wimper and beg for me. I could bend him in half.

I appreciate a "Dilf Aged" Muppet. His wrinkles and grey hairs just make me pant like a Joker in heat!

The real Hoggle puppet was lost for a time after the production of the movie, and when it was discovered months later, it had somewhat "decomposed." I never knew I had a kink for muppets in a state of decay before learning this. Thanks, Hoggle!

His small stature tickles my Vore bone (like a funny bone but for Vore). I could eat that muppet whole. Or his muppet hole. Either way I will be a happy camper.

It is easy to envision David Bowie's character receiving oral sex from Hoggle due to David Bowie's prominent c*ck outline in his skin tight pants as well as the fact that Hoggle is eye level with it the entire time. Fuck now I am all the way hard

Dark Crystal I will discuss another day. For now, comprehend this:

I want to fuck Hoggle so badly and if I am not able to help others realize his raw sex appeal, I will be quitting the internet and taking a vow of silence. A world where Hoggle is deemed unfuckable is a world without hope.

[olderthannetfic]

I recently joined a support group on my campus for survivors of CSA and almost immediately ran into the "your brain doesn't stop developing until you're 25" thing. Pointed out the study was debunked, posted links showing it was debunked, and was informed that no, it was totally legit. No we can't show you sources, it just is.

Also, apparently for neurodivergent people, our brains don't develop fully until we're 28. The source? Science. Studies. Which studies? What scientists? Science and studies now shut up, child.

And then the coup de grace, being told that science says that if you're traumatized as a child, it's like fucking up making a cake. There's no unfucking it up, no way to go back and redo the mix, the cake will be worse than the other cakes and you have to accept that. You will never be capable of being like other people. You were fundamentally altered and need to accept that. When I said no, I do not believe that, I believe I can live a life just like anyone else's, and in a lot of ways I already do, I was shot down and told I was invalidating others' beliefs and lived experiences and needed to look at 'the facts', which I think refers to the science nobody can cite me.

It's not just ace discourse that leaks off the internet into offline spaces. A lot of fandom olds like to talk as if this stuff doesn't exist offline and isn't doing any harm, but it's out there, and being told that you're just a kid and you're fundamentally broken? That really fucked up one of the people present, to the point he shut down and spent most of the meeting silently crying and staring into the middle distance listlessly, looking significantly more miserable than before he'd arrived.

"Go touch grass then lol" bro THIS is what happens when people try to reach out and do that! This is the realistic, grounded world you think is so different from the internet! The grass is laced with the same toxic pollen as the inside and your solution is for people to roll around in it?!

--

Oh good lord! Sounds like their commitment to science isn't exactly... uh... strong.

[fyeahlolita]

Secret Lolita Information From The Distant Past: Dashcon Lolita

A very long time ago, myself and another Lolita who maybe wants to remain unnamed, ended up joining the Dashcon "Lolita Committee"(before it was called Dashcon even, it was still going to be called Tumblrcon at the time), because they were sending out messages to a lot of Lolita bloggers/groups to advertise on their behalf and it seemed like a complete clusterfuck even in that early stage. It was still really really early in the planning and we were like "maybe we can unfuck this a little bit?" but we couldn't, and the rest of the team seemed to have zero interest in unfucking it, so we bounced after a few weeks. Obviously, Dashcon happened how it did, so me and mystery-chan didn't really mention that we were let in behind the curtain for this particular internet fiasco. But it was very surreal, even at the time, and we probably both definitely told like every person we knew in real life, just not openly online so there was no proof. The way it was set up was there were, like, "fandom committees", where there were literally dozens of "fandom committees" headed by one person with a small team of recruited people under them. They were in charge of fundraising for Dashcon (then known as Tumblrcon though), mostly supposed to be done through auctioning off fandom stuff, as well as organizing events for their particular fandom. The "Lolita Committee" was fronted by some like teenaged cosplayer/brony, who I don't personally fault for not knowing a single thing about Lolita, but they didn't seem to know anything about Lolita and were trying to set up all these Lolita events for a convention that, at the time, had no venue or money. I think ultimately the Lolita committee raised like less than $60 from one of the members doing some Etsy sales and spent a lot of time discussing a budget for a dream tea party and wondering how to get Angelic Pretty involved, but also were concerned about Angelic Pretty wanting to host a "competing" tea party at the con. We had money raising goals, but none of them ever happened, with any of the Fandom Committees really, at least early on, for some reason I was given access to a TON of google docs for all the other Fandom Committees like the instant they added me to the group.

I was very confused about the name change from Tumblrcon to Dashcon

What you got if you donated to this particular Committee. Although I don't think it even got as far to tell people this. Everything was just... conceptual. Then I think the Committees were mostly purged once Tumblrcon became Dashcon?

This was a message from the main admin for the con.

Ouch, sorry Committees. A section from the same admin written doc.

Hello, just me gossiping about it with a friend back when it was happening live.

Again, I don't fault the other members of the Lolita Committee, because they were absolutely young and unqualified and in over their heads, and they were trying really hard, but this is a weird part of my Lolita history that I've never publicly talked about before.

[hot-take-tournament]

HOT COLD TAKE TOURNAMENT!

Submission 644 & 746 (64.1% validated)

buggy isn't hot

he’s just not. look at him. yeah yeah he’s got tits and a detachable dick but he’s so cringe and fail. i would not fuck him personally.

buggy the clown is not fucking hot

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN. HAVE YOU LAID EYES ON HIM. i’m extremely homosexual for men and yet i have not even an inch of attraction to this little blue haired and pronouned bastard. yes he has three boyfriends but if you see me as one of them shoot me, that’s an evil clone, i would never willingly put my penis inside of buggothy theodore clownsworth.

Submission 515 (63.7% validated)

if you must ship Jesus with one of his disciples then at least ship him with John

look I'm a Christian (but like not the bad kind) and I don't personally ship Jesus with anyone cause that feels a bit too much rpf-y for me but I see people (jokingly, I assume, for the most part, but also this is the internet so I know some people are very serious about this) ship Jesus with either Judas or Peter and like....... tell me your knowledge of the Bible is the few Bible stories you remembered from sunday school as a kid without telling me that your knowledge of the Bible is the few Bible stories you remembered from sunday school as a kid. like yeah sure there's all these great stories about these guys that kids learn about! everyone who has some basic knowledge of the whole easter deal knows Judas and if you've learned any stories about Jesus with the disciples then you probably know about Peter. but like........ John is the guy. like go read the book of John if you don't believe me. like this is the guy who is canonically (fun reminder that the term "canon" originates from people discussing the Bible long long ago) "the disciple who Jesus loved." like Sufjan Stevens, king of "is he talking about his boyfriend or Jesus" refers to John & Jesus' relationships in his song "John My Beloved" which is hella gay and like it's all right there!!!!!! like this is so strange for me to be invested in because I'm not like someone who actively ships them but like if I wasn't religious and all I would be all over this and the fact that people keep being like "hehe Jesus and Judas~~~" when there's like no textual evidence for that!!! it's just people seeing the kiss of betrayal and liking some dramatic stuff!!! and the people who bring up Peter instead are the same!!! like you're just applying fanfic tropes to a dynamic and deciding that you like it instead of like looking at what's actually there in canon!!!!!!!! like at least do cool blasphemy or whatever I hate that I care about this. I hate that I wrote all of this. I have no dog in this fight. whoever wins I lose because I don't want to care about this in any way but I do and it's horrible and I just wish people would at least talk about the guy who when having to read his gospel like a year ago for something, I was left with the thought of "huh....... if I didn't know any better I'd say that there was something going on here"

Propaganda is always encouraged!

And remember to reblog your favourite polls for exposure!

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

I wanted to make a joke about how poison ivy is most unfuckable bc fucking her would give one pussythelioma but then i was like hold on is there a better batman villain to make this joke about, like, "asbestos man" or something? and then i was joking about going on the internet and lying and goncharoving a fake batman rogue to everyone and then out of curiosity i googled "asbestos comic book" and it turns out there is both an Asbestos Man and Asbestos Lady, however they were both marvel characters so i cant make a joke about them being the most unfuckable batman rogues for pussythelioma reasons. anyway i agree with a number of previous askers about hugo strange and the riddler and scarecrow and babydoll. unfortunately im only barely a batmancasual so i dont know enough of the rogues to have fun answers. sorry for poison ivy slander i dont avtually think she is unfuckable except for the contact dermatitis. but perhaps with like, a condom, other protections, that could be avoided? sorry for telling you this hope you have a good day i enjoy your blog a lot! bye

oh my god Asbestos Man... the man of asbestos...