#is he as elusive as jaehyun

[13elmst]

he comes out of the womb with fists clenched. stubby fingers curling around locks of mother’s hair and they stay firm in his hold, unmoving even as mother begs— even if he were to rip it right off. that’s the thing about people like him: take away enough from someone, and you teach them what it means to want. and park jaehyun has always wanted, two fists forward, ready to grapple and snatch things as they were presented to him.

and here it is now, two fists held out in front of him. he’s not talking about the soccer, the sickening crack when he slid his ankle underneath another’s spiked boot for a ball he wanted. he’s talking about her. chae sohee, the girl with the kind of smile that can sometimes make a want feel like a need. see, the thing about people like her was that they knew how to work with people like him. as in work— her, with the dangling carrot. him, with the wolfish appetite. she’d batted her eyes and shot him a cunning smile that one time at a party, and he’s been hooked ever since.

now they’re here, standing across from each other at the nurse’s office. he’d noticed her from across the room, sniffles and the weather enough to know that she wasn’t here for anything grave, so he’d taken this as an opportunity. something about a distant branch and a hanging fruit. jaehyun approaches, begins with an, “ah, the elusive chae sohee.” and it must seem like a bit of sarcasm, the way he’s limped his way to her with a wicked sprain and a maddening rash on his neck from having to use the fucking patch during the game, but the grin he dons betrays his genuine delight, “must be my lucky day.” and there’s a pause, like he’s holding the words in his mouth, contemplating if he likes the taste of it. the conclusion: a cheeky, “but am i lucky enough to get your number?” and here, he cocks a brow like a challenge.

ft. park jaehyun & @ge0mi's chae sohee

[wingedvictor]

JUNG JAEHYUN  23  CISMALE  HE/HIM — ; where do you get your inspiration, NAM MINJUN ? you’re so DRIVEN , i can’t help but think of MUSEUM DATES, OLD RECORDS AND SHATTERED STATUES when i hear your name. your friends tell me you can be EVASIVE sometimes. i guess it’s understandable given the circumstances. besides , i can’t even imagine how stressful SCULPTURE classes must be — not to mention you’re also in THE RED AND GREEN CLUB, HOWLITES (CAPTAIN) AND MISS TATE (BASS) ! you’re a LOCAL , right ? yeah, i thought so. either way , welcome to mugunghwa ! 

hey! it's dean here with nam minjun — a sculpture arts major, newly appointed captain of the male soccer team, and bassist of miss tate—though you might know him better as the one who always came second to son jisoo. he’s much like the misunderstood villain you’d read about in books, the kind you’d be drawn to if perfect golden boys (cough jisoo cough) are too boring for you. that, or you’re a masochist who romanticises pain. if you'd like to plot, give this post a like and i’ll drop you a message! i also have discord, if that’s what you prefer.

BACKGROUND:

born and bred in mugunghwa; he can't decide if he loves or hates this place.

put simply, he feels like a big fish in a small pond. on one hand, he likes being at the very top of the hierarchy, but on the other, he feels suffocated.

the only child to the nams. you’d think he’d be coddled and cherished like their finest treasure, but somehow, they still had a way to make him feel like he was never good enough.

he's known jisoo ever since they were kids (or babies, to be exact). their parents were always close (at least, on the surface) and have been rivals since they were younger.

naturally, this rivalry carried on to their children. all hell broke loose when they both gave birth to sons in the same year.

he can't remember a time in his life not being to compared to jisoo. everything, from their academics, artistic abilities, athleticism, height, to even the kind of girls they brought home, was a measure of their success.

he had always felt like a tool, used to extend his parents' sense of self-worth. they needed him to win, for them to win.

at some point, he grew to desire everything jisoo wanted, even if didn't really want it himself. growing up, it felt like everything jisoo had was what he needed to have too. if not, he would be inferior and god forbid he was anything but that.

he has a complicated relationship with jisoo. kind of like how he feels about mugunghwa—a love-hate relationship.

sometimes, he wishes jisoo never existed so he didn't have to compete with him, to feel like he’s not good enough all his life, but there are days when things are different.

on those days, he feels like jisoo is a brother he never had, days when he is actually relieved jisoo was around to make this town feel a little less lonely.

that's when he starts feeling bad for always competing with him, for never truly being happy for his accomplishments—for not being a good friend. because a good friend wouldn’t secretly wish you’ll fuck up, right?

but then jisoo beats him again and the cycle repeats, again and again.

just like how complex their friendship was, minjun’s reaction to jisoo’s passing is no different. some days he feels sad, then relieved, then angry, then everything all at once.

he's sad to lose a friend he's known since forever; a part of his identity he's never been allowed to break away from, but he's also relieved that jisoo was no longer in his way, that all those years of constant comparisons finally came to an end.

but most of all, he's angry, that even in death, he is still reminded of how he is second to jisoo, that none of the things he has now truly belongs to him—that he’ll never get to beat jisoo with his own merits.

jisoo’s death was not just a loss of a friend and competitor, but a sense of self; a benchmark he’s had his entire life.

PERSONALITY:

taciturn and elusive, but not forgettable.

the aloof boy that acts like a wallflower, but is really the kind you find yourself getting curious about.

hard to approach, probably not the friendliest face in the hallway.

doesn't really talk to people outside his circle. (though i’d really love for some unexpected connections!)

some might even think he’s stuck-up, that he thinks he’s better than others. (partially true. he actually doubts himself a lot, he’s just antisocial and doesn’t bother trying. also had a friend (jisoo) all his life so he never had to try either.)

very driven and hardworking. set on perfecting his craft.

maybe it’s because he tries so hard in art and sports that he seems nonchalant in every other aspect, like his social life.

is also frustratingly cryptic, an enigma that is hard to decipher even if you’ve known him all your life.

thinks a lot, which is both his vice and virtue.

romanticises a lot of things. particularly people. tends to fall in love with the idea of someone and not who they really are.

kind of toxic. he doesn’t like things (or people) that are easy to get, because he’s so accustomed to not getting what he wants with ease, to wanting the things that don’t belong to him.

has a lot of buried anger and resentment towards his parents and jisoo that is reflected in his art; is otherwise bad at expressing it.

inner child needs healing, tbh.

AT MUGUNGHWA:

sculpture arts major: wasn’t always a sculpture artist. when he was younger, he had also pursued painting alongside jisoo, just because his parents wanted him to. it wasn’t until he starting traveling around europe and got exposed to sculpture art did he realise it was something he enjoyed more. definitely helps that he’s also better at it and no longer has to live in jisoo’s shadow, at least for art.

part of the red and green club: truthfully, he likes that he is part of this club. he knows that it’s something his parents brag about, one of the few things he’s earned their validation for. his jewelled accessory is a pair of cufflinks.

took jisoo's place as captain of the howlites: frankly didn't even want to be captain that bad, he just wanted it because jisoo was running for it. and he has to have everything jisoo has. now that he has it, he's starting to realise that it wasn't as great as he made it out to be—not that he'd ever admit any of this.

plays the bass in miss tate: the one thing he has that was not tied to jisoo. his parents didn't like that he was in a rock band (they considered it uncouth and a waste of time) but it’s precisely why he pursued it, because he needed an escape from their constant comparisons. he needed a part of him entirely to himself, with no way of being compared to perfect little jisoo.

WANTED CONNECTIONS:

someone jisoo liked but couldn’t have? maybe jisoo told him about his crush and complained about how hard it was to get their attention. (though we'd have to check with the admin if it interferes with the plot!) this could've sparked minjun’s interest and he ends up wanting them too, though he doesn’t know if he actually likes them or if he only wanted them because jisoo did. toxic, push and pull type of relationship where they can’t tell how he really feels about them. fwb/more than friends less than lovers type shit.

on the contrary, someone that likes him and is always there for him. probably one of the sweetest people in his life (someone who is actually good for him) but he’s a toxic mfer who wants what he can’t have. he knows he can have them so he doesn’t treasure them but he still sticks around because they make him feel wanted, like he’s good enough for once. one word: angst.

someone very different from him (probably someone who is free spirited and wants to leave mugunghwa). someone he actually likes talking to, whose opinions he wants to hear. he might not agree but he enjoys the discourse; a breath of fresh air in his suffocating environment.

escape in human form, someone that has no connection to the keepers/the red and green club, or the life he’s always known in mugunghwa, someone who he can forget everything around. preferably someone who didn’t know jisoo personally and never got to compare them.

male soccer team members who don’t think he’s worthy of the captain position, that he only got it because of his prestige, not because he’s a good leader (they’re probably right). they either think of jisoo as their only captain and doesn’t acknowledge minjun as one, or they hate that the position was always between them, because they’re keepers and come from influential families.

[dojae-huh]

I am not giving them any value. I was writing on what they think. And.. that’s it? I read my ask again and maybe it sounds like me saying that? I should put quote unquote on the ‘our mc’ line.

Our mc should just stay as mc.

All i’m saying is that’s the narrative they use to justify their irritation towards doyoung. What i think is Doyoung can do can be whatever it is he wants to. He definitely doesn’t need to stay in this perception of being in a different standards as the others. He decides what he wills.

He should be able to change his fate as he wills. He works hard for it and deserves it. He got a a lot of good qualities and even his look is one of it. Yes, he starts slow esp with the late debut as 127 but his progress is really admirable. Standards exist from various perspectives and those who fit in will get a bit of a boost at the start. He perseveres and find lots of ways to find long lasting fans, one is by sharing his passion for singing, covers and all. He doesn’t check all the boxes (i mean who does? What boxes even?) even at this high time of his career (which hasn’t reach the peak btw) but those are just elusive standards we should not even hold against celebrities. I stand by his hard work to become a singer for a very long time and i’ve come to love his little touches in the songs he had taken part arrangement-wise. And I can’t wait for more of his involvement in his musicsss. And he got a lot of fans who appreciate more qualities of his. Soo definitely outweigh more of what these antis are repeating over and over again.

And i stand by my words when i say the way they were promoted also influenced and even shape the perception of fans. These titles , ace, center, visuals does affect fans perceptions towards the members especially at the beginning. However, these perceptions changes over time along with the idol’s skills and values. A lot of antis chose to stay stuck with their early perceptions of an idol (which may or may not be true) and does not want to accept the change. For ex: Oh he doesn’t have lots of fans during debut. And even now, they still use the same things. He doesn’t have a lot of fans. And unknown person yada yada

By bringing up antis and descriptions of their opinions in your first ask, you gave them value. You sacrificed my time for the sake of their narrative. And the space on this blog as well. You and the readers before spred their message from twitter to here. Do you understand it now? The discussion of "what they think" is already attention.

It would be OK one time, but this topic resurfaces constantly. And I want to shut it down.

Doyoung didn't start late. He was a singer before joining SM, he debuted in 2015 and then with t7s in 2016 ine the first NCT unit. He appeared on tv programmes one of the first among neos, he had many duets. Without realising you succumb to the "loser" or "lower status" narrative. Yes, there were fans who disliked him for joining 127 later. There were fans who had been waiting for him. However, the most hated back then was Taeyong. Jaehyun was called a pig during Limitless. This narrative of some neos being more loved or of "higher status" is false. Antis rely on newer fans not knowing the history.

Jaehyun started as a cutie, he is a hot guy now. Taeyong's image was that of a fierce, reliable leader. He is a goofy Tyong now. Doyoung got a girlfriend in his second MV and another one in Star blossom, he had the boyfriend image.

Most of the current fans weren't there at the beginning to form long-lasting impressions. Especially when it comes to ifans.

A celebrety can be most beautiful, smart, talented and kind person on Earth. People will hate for those exact traits. Any individual story to success can be either painted in a positive or negative light. Antis don't need real reason.

[neowinestainedress]

loving him was red ♡ nct 127 series

On the occasion of the release of “RED” Taylor’s version, I wanted to make a series that celebrates love.

This series is about the "red relationships". «The ones that went from zero to a hundred miles per hour and then hit a wall and exploded. And it was awful. And ridiculous. And desperate. And thrilling. And when the dust settled, it was something I'd never take back. Because there is something to be said for being young and needing someone so badly, you jump in head first without looking. And there's something to be learned from waiting all day for a train that's never coming. And there's something to be proud of about moving on and realizing that real love shines golden like starlight, and doesn't fade or spontaneously combust. (...) But this is about the other kinds of love. Love that was treacherous, sad, beautiful and tragic. Most of all, this is about love that was RED. »

The stories are not related to each other. Originally I had planned to write for all the love songs in the album but then I decided to cut some, so there’s why some members have two (or more) stories and others just one. I don’t own NCT and their images and in no way these stories represent them, this is just fiction and all of their actions are made up. I haven’t finished writing all of these, so I don’t really know when they’ll be out, but I’ll release them all (I might replace the ones that still don’t have a plot with other songs but I think it’ll only be all too well because I’m not sure I’ll be able to write for that song). I’m planning to release at least once a month but keep in mind that I also have a life and I’m busy with uni so the release might change. But If I have more time and be inspired to write I might publish more. There shouldn’t be anything really triggering but read the warnings once I publish the single fic. I promise there won’t be only pain but also fluff and a lot of smut, not in every fic but still be careful and check the final warnings.    

STATE OF GRACE - JOHNNY 

↳ ❝ Love is a ruthless game unless you play it good and right. ❞

pairing: suh johnny x oc  

genre: smut, fluff, ceo au, established relationship au, implied past academic rivals to lovers au, slice of life, parents au (just at the end)

summary: Happy endings are only for the heroes of stories, the brokenhearted. Heartbreakers rarely find happiness in the last pages of their book. But life’s unexpected, and it happens that sinners and heartbreakers might get their happy endings. She never expected to find love, she never tried to make it happen, especially with the person she could barely stand, but when Johnny came around and her armor fell, there was nothing else she could do.

status: read here 

RED - YUTA

↳  ❝ Like the colors in autumn, so bright, just before they lose it all. ❞

pairing: nakamoto yuta x oc 

genre: racer!au, smut, angst, 

summary: Yuta was elusive, fast and bright and loud like the streets he rode with his fast cars. Their story started suddenly and ended even more unexpectedly. But Yuta is still vivid in her mind, burning red. And the only things she is left with are memories that don’t leave her brain and whishing she never found out that love could be that strong. 

status: there’s nothing here 

TREACHEROUS - DOYOUNG 

↳  ❝ And all we are is skin and bone trained to get along. ❞

pairing: kim doyoung x oc 

genre: smut, fwb to lovers!au, getting together!au, fluff

summary:  Loving Doyoung is treacherous, reckless, but she can’t help being pulled to him. She knows she should let him go, but she can’t stop thinking about him, his name haunting her every night. So she risks it all because it’s known that nothing safe is worth the drive. 

status: read here 

I KNEW YOU WERE TROUBLE - JAEHYUN 

↳  ❝  Flew me to places I'd never been. Now I'm lyin' on the cold hard ground. ❞

pairing: jeong jaehyun x oc 

genre: photographer!au, strangers to fwb to lovers to ex!au, smut, toxic relationship, cheating,

summary: Falling into the trap of the wolf is easy when you're naive and heartbroken, when you only want to be wanted and loved. She knew how sneaky that path was, she knew she shouldn't have followed him that night and kept living her boring life. But emotions get people’s heads and make them feel lightweight, and Jaehyun made her fly so high she never wanted to come back down. Unfortunately, every prize comes with a price, players stay players, and you’ll be nothing but a notch in their belt for them. 

status: read here

ALL TOO WELL - JOHNNY 

↳  ❝ You told me 'bout your past thinking your future was me. ❞

pairings: suh johnny x oc 

genre: angst, fluff, smut, break up!au, (possible) age gap,  

summary: tba

status: there’s nothing here 

I ALMOST DO - TAEYONG 

↳  ❝ I can't say "Hello" to you and risk another goodbye.❞

pairings: lee taeyong x oc

genre: angst, fluff, reminiscing on a past relationship, 

summary:  tba

status: there’s nothing here

STAY STAY STAY - MARK 

↳  ❝  No one else is gonna love me when I get mad. So I think that it's best if we both stay. ❞

pairings: lee mark  x oc 

genre: slice of life, fluff, enstablished relationship 

summary: tba

status: there’s nothing here

THE LAST TIME - TAEIL 

↳  ❝ You wear your best apology, but I was there to watch you leave.❞

pairing:  moon taeil x oc 

genre: break up/make up!au, implied cheating, angst, 

summary:  tba

status: there’s nothing here

HOLY GROUND - JUNGWOO 

↳  ❝  Back when you fit in my poems like a perfect rhyme. ❞

pairing: kim jungwoo x oc

genre: singer!oc, non idol!jungwoo, slice of life, reminiscing on a past relationship, fluff, melancholy

summary: Going to your ex’s concert is not a great idea, Jungwoo knows it, but he wants to see her again. He wants to hear her sing the songs he heard before anybody else to a crowd of strangers. He wants to feel his heart break in his chest knowing that she doesn’t feel the same anymore. But when she hears that her ex is in the crowd, she also has a surprise for him. Because no matter what happened between them, she would always be grateful for having him in his life. Right where they stood, was holy ground. 

status: there’s nothing here

SAD BEAUTIFUL TRAGIC -  JAEHYUN 

↳  ❝ Words, how little they mean, when you're a little too late.❞

pairing: jeong jaehyun x oc

genre: idol!au, childhood friends to lovers to strangers, smut, angst, some fluff, 

summary: The old days were much easier when she and Jaehyun would play in the meadows till late afternoon. It was easier when the only thing that caressed her cheeks was the air of the countryside while she fell in love with Jaehyun and not the salty tears that traced her face now that she was missing him. “Wait for me,” he had asked her and she did. Because that’s what good girls do, hopeful they'll be and long they will wait. 

status: there’s nothing here

EVERYTHING HAS CHANGED - HAECHAN

↳  ❝ And your eyes look like coming home.❞

pairing: lee haechan x oc 

genre: coffee shop!au, strangers to friends to lovers, fluff, mutual pining, getting together, (tiny little bit) angst

summary: She would’ve never imagined that the person that would’ve turned her life around was going to show up in that small cafè where she worked every day and hated so much. But sometimes, it only takes a coffee shop, brown eyes and a rain storm for everything to change.

status: read here

BEGIN AGAIN -TAEYONG 

↳  ❝  And for the first time, what's past is past.❞

pairing: lee taeyong x oc

genre: fluff, getting together, getting out of a past toxic relationship, 

summary: The midnight booked trip to Paris was supposed to be a getaway to the pain her city brought to her, with every corner screaming her ex’s name. She had no idea what it would’ve brought to her. She had no idea somebody could creep into her shattered heart so easily. But Taeyong was good to prove to her that after months of suffering you can watch love begin again, and in the most unexpected place, on a Wednesday in a Parisian cafè.

status: there’s nothing here

THE MOMENT I KNEW - MARK 

↳  ❝  You should've been here. And I would've been so happy.❞

pairing: lee mark x oc

genre: idol!au, birthday party, slice of life

summary: Trying to keep together the relationship with an idol was hard enough if you were close, but if distance was another thing that pulled you apart, it was even more complicated. She is trying, really, letting the smallest things slide, trying to ignore the voice in the back of her head that is telling her that he has another one, that that’s the reason behind the cold textes and short phone calls. But when he doesn’t make it to her birthday party, all those fears come crambiling on her.  And what do you do when the one who means the most to you is the one who didn't show?

status: there’s nothing here

COME BACK... BE HERE - YUTA 

↳  ❝ Taxi cabs and busy streets that never bring you back to me.❞

pairing: nakamoto yuta x oc

genre: dilf!Yuta, aged up!Yuta (37), CEO au, fwb au, smut, angst

summary:  Falling for a man that could be your father is not a wise thing to do, and it’s even worse when he’s worlds away and the rules at the start were very clear, no feelings on the line. But she had never been good at following them, and now, she was paying the price.

status: read here

MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE - THERE’S NOTHING HERE

↳  ❝ A message in a bottle is all I can do. Standin' here, hopin' it gets to you.❞

pairing: TBA

genre:  TBA

summary:  TBA

I BET YOU THINK ABOUT ME - THERE’S NOTHING HERE

↳  ❝  Does it make you feel sad, that the love that you're lookin' for is the love that you had? ❞

pairing: TBA

genre:  TBA

summary:  TBA

RUN -  THERE’S NOTHING HERE

↳  ❝  There's a heart on your sleeve. I'll take it when I leave and hold it for you. ❞

pairing: TBA

genre:  TBA

summary:  TBA

THE VERY FIRST NIGHT -  THERE’S NOTHING HERE

↳  ❝ No one knows about the words that we whisper. No one knows how much I miss you. ❞

pairing: TBA

genre:  TBA

summary:  TBA

a/n: if you reached the end thank you. I hope you’ll like these stories and have patience for the wait, I promise I’ll do my best to upload regularly. I’ll update this masterlist every time i start writing something and change the status and also the warnings. 

[lustbile]

Heyyyyyy mtl in 127 to praise you in bed for almost everything?

johnny, taeyong:

oh you like idk made one noise? do you know how perfect you are???? like even the smallest thing they’re like my baby!!! you’re so perfect. the only difference is johnny teams it with an insane amount of degradation as well.

doyoung, jaehyun:

almost on the same level, especially doyoung but also just focused on what’s going on. I will say jaehyun to a lesser degree than doyoung just because he’s just here for the vibes but can’t help himself when you do something so cute

taeil, yuta:

taeil, again just here for the vibes, but that doesn’t mean you won’t get anything. the way he smiles at you is praise enough because god the adoration he can hold in just a look. yuta, similarly is more elusive and prefers the sounds he makes and the way he grabs you to do the talking, but he will not pass up an opportunity to praise you in a way that’s degrading and kind of back handed because he likes the dumb kind of stare you get and the way it makes you drool.

mark, jungwoo:

boy do they try, and yes I think there is some successes but they’re more flukes than anything. they’re a little more awkward about it, but when something happens and they’re in the moment they can’t help what they blurt out especially when they’re so enraptured

haechan:

haechan more so prefers to be the one praised than being the one doing the praising, but I don’t think that means he’s giving you nothing. of course he likes the sparkle you get in your eye when he says something sweet, but he more so prefers the tears you let out when he’s mean

[wh6res]

dreams come true | yuta

"soulmate or not. i don't shoot blanks." — ny

[ part of the my bloody valentine collection ]

tw. gore, blood, murder, death, killings, mentions of illegal organ trafficking, violence, mentions of stalking, minor character deaths, weapons (a knife and a gun), almost (??) suggestive content but nothing happened

disc. this is rlly fucked up and yuta is unredeemable. i dont condone such acts. this is all a work of fiction and meant to entertain.

wc. 5k

every time you sleep, the void is sickening. it was all you could see, lightyears and lightyears away of pitch black that made your head dizzy and your stomach dry heave. you've always wondered when you'll start dreaming about your soulmate's memories. they were like little secrets, another way for two people to be intimate without even being together. their days were flashing before their soulmate's eyes in the form of a dream. it's as if you spent the day with them!

you loved it, the whole concept of it. it sounded so wholesome and sweet and jesus fucking christ, you've always been such a hopeless romantic.

it was sweet until it turned sour. you loved it until you hated it. it was romantic until it turned downright terrifying.

you wake up covered in cold sweat, panting and gasping as if you've run a whole marathon.

moonlight seeps through your glass window, slightly left ajar for the midnight breeze to pass through – you walk up to it, pull it shut, and draw your thick curtains together. you exhaled, breath shaking as you tried to anchor yourself back to the ground.

with the only source of your light disappearing, darkness envelops you whole. for once, you craved the void. you want that void back if it meant never seeing something like that again – something straight out of your worst nightmare.

"119, what's your emergency?"

"uhm, i think… i think i just witnessed a massacre."

you reiterate everything you saw in the dream – the mahogany door, paint chipping off the drywalls. the doorknob was rusty, so were the hinges, and it made an ominous creak when pushed open. the light switches on, the first you see was a bunch of dirty ice coolers in what should've been the living room, it wasn't even the slightest bit organized. they were everywhere, and the floor looked grimy and disgusting, like there's a stain they can't seem to scrub off. only when your soulmate has stalked closer did you see the labels haphazardly taped on top of the ice coolers.

kidneys. livers. lungs. pancreas. intestines – you nearly vomited on the floor, trying to relay everything you saw to the operator on the other end of the call.

then came the gruesome parts.

their deaths.

they were five people in total. men clad in cheap t-shirts and pants, wearing all these similar leather jackets. some were well-built, ripped in the arms and thighs, but some were skinny, the jackets hanging on their small frames.

they never stood a chance against him.

your soulmate is agile, quick on his feet with outstanding eye-hand coordination. only equipped with a butcher's knife, but it was all he needed to take them down and send them knocking on inferno's gates. he was skilled, knowing when to pounce and where to slash his knife to maim but never to kill. by the time your soulmate was through with them, everything is bloody red. all the victims' eyes widened as they sputtered and choked on their blood – not dead, but dying...

because your soulmate wasn't done yet.

a killer should have a modus operandi, should they not? so he took out a desert eagle, stood before the bleeding bodies, and shot two bullets straight into their eyes. the finishing touch? carving a frown on their faces with his butcher's knife.

the operator only told you one thing after she's made you describe the place for them to track the crime scene down.

"double-check all your windows and doors."

because you couldn't be too sure, not when you have been granted a front seat to the sad face slayer's most recent endeavors.

the detective eyes you with a certain pity. maybe that's why you don't bother meeting his eyes. you sit still on a chair, camera blinking red behind him, the interrogation room is freezing even with the thick jacket you're wearing.

seven billion people in the world and you're soulmate's a ruthless serial killer who took it upon himself to purge the world of evildoers – he was playing god, no wonder the detective is looking at you like that.

"uhh…" he's awkward, fidgeting in his seat. "and you saw this all in a dream?"

"yes."

you've known him only minutes ago. mark lee was his name and he seems to be a subordinate of a higher, more experienced detective named kim doyoung. you don't know whether to feel offended or not for having a doe-eyed newbie taking care of the case, but you pushed it at the back of your mind, knowing his superior is watching on the other side of the two-way mirror.

"did you have, like, other past instances where you dreamt of him? of what he…" mark looked like he was going to throw up. "what he does to his other victims?"

you shook your head. no. "i've mostly just heard of him on the news. i don't think i have the stomach to find out in-depth what the killer does."

mark takes out a folder, features walking the fine white line between looking apologetic or wanting to say me too. "i'm, uhh, really sorry to hear that."

there's a sudden pregnant silence encapsulating the interrogation room. it felt like you were mourning for something, the chains of dread dragging your heart to the ground as it pounded against your ribcage. mark looked like he wanted to say something, but you swore his eyes darted towards the camera in the corner and decided otherwise.

"anyway…" he trails. flipping the folder open in one swift motion. "past sightings have given us the sad face slayer's name."

he slaps down a picture of a man, his hair raven and a permanent scowl etched on his face. the quality was shitty. it looked like it was a screenshot taken from zoomed-in cctv footage.

"nakamoto yuta, twenty-five, japanese, and has slipped one too many times past authorities that at this point, it's practically a talent."

and just like that, it made sense why you're here.

your lips pursed in contemplation, palms quaking as your fingers reach forward to inspect your soulmate's picture. "and… you want to use my soulmate connection –" you glowered. never had a sentence sounded so fucking cursed and utterly wrong. "– to catch him?"

mark can't look you in the eye. "yes. he's very elusive. his killings have been happening cross-country and, as you can see, have garnered national media attention. the police are hanging by a thread here. a month in his case and all we got is his MO, name, and that he has this weird god complex on him. if we can't catch him by the end of next month…" he shrugs. "the feds are going to interfere, sooner or later."

"so…" you trail, urging him to continue.

"so, we need as much information about him as we can get and your dreams about him will be able to provide that."

fucking great.

the much newer revelations of precisely who it was on the other end of the soulmate connection put a significant damper on your mood. you'd like to think your new little cop buddy who follows you around gives you the least bit sense of security, but alas, it doesn't. not when you've seen first hand how yuta took down five men all at once without breaking a fucking sweat – you absolutely refuse to call him your soulmate, you'd never accept a person with his nature as a soulmate.

you try to hide the bracelet mark handed you last two weeks ago, during your time spent in the precinct's interrogation room.

"please have this on you at all times until we catch him, okay? this is for extra measures, just in case something happens to the cop assigned to guard you. just press the little button here and we'll be there before you can even finish shouting 'help!' – hey, i was just kidding! what's with the face?"

considering you're now probably being hunted alive for snitching on a serial killer? mark lee, that was not funny at all.

"do you have to get inside the lecture with me?" you whine, shielding your face with your hair when you notice people shooting glances at the rather handsome cop they assigned to you. "it's not like he'll attack in broad daylight! and in a fucking classroom, for that matter."

jaehyun looks just about ready to hurl you out the window. "lower down your voice," he scolds. "serial killers don't pick a time and place, sweetheart. he kills when necessary and if it's fucking necessary to murder everyone in that classroom to get to you? he'll do it in a fucking heartbeat."

you sigh when the chair next to you screeches against the floor, the aforementioned male taking his seat right next to you. jaehyun felt more like a babysitter than a cop, who seems to have a habit of constantly inputting his not-even-needed opinions on the most superficial things.

are witness protection protocols like this?

it was a good thing that overgrown bat doesn't come hanging around in your apartment, but he does have the police car parked right across the building's entrance. judging by how meticulous and thorough he seems to be, he won't miss any face that comes in and out of the building.

you didn't forget exactly why you're under witness protection. for the cops to waste one good officer to follow you around, you needed to be valuable and being valuable meant sleeping through nightmare-induced dreams of what your soulmate does for a living. the scenes are so gruesome, so graphic and utterly gory, that you dart towards the bathroom first thing after waking up in cold sweat, draining all of dinner down the toilet bowl.

after dreaming of him in action a few times, you've now completely understood what detective lee had said regarding yuta's god complex. it was unsightly, yet there was a twisted sense of heroism to it. if there's one thing, he only gutted the bad guys – but that didn't make nakamoto yuta any less of a bad guy, himself.

i need to ask you a favor [sent 2:05am]

JJH: what? [received 2:10am]

often the nightmares were too much. too much that you thought of escaping its horrors by never getting a wink of sleep ever again – until you realized you're a witness and is probably the only chance for the seoul police department to catch that bastard.

buy me sleeping pills? [read 2:08am]

when you peep out of the window, you find an empty spot across the road where jaehyun usually parks the police car. twenty minutes later, you answer the knocking on your door. he used that little "code" he did for you to know it was him. jaehyun was glowering and muttering about how he wasn't some errand boy when he shoved the plastic bottle in your hand yet, you still thanked him nonetheless.

the pills worked like a charm. you managed to stay asleep throughout the whole night, ceasing those episodes of yours where you jolt awake in the middle of dreaming about the sad face slayer's memories.

life continued for you. it became a little bearable, but that didn't mean the horrific murders you see in your dreams are something you can get used to – you don't think you'll ever get used to the sight of him slashing his victims, the blood trickling like a goddamned waterfall.

today the dreams were different. anticlimactic, per se, if you compare it to the violence so utterly present in his memories.

the first you see were black gates, then it shifted to him ordering coffee in a café (amazing what a simple black mask can hide). it switched to him walking on a sidewalk, then he arrives at his destination, an apartment building – it wasn't too rundown, nor was it extravagant.

the serial killer takes the elevator and walks up to a mahogany door –

your room number is a blaring sight.

you couldn't be wrong, not when the 506 with the missing zero in the middle was a sight you saw every day, going and coming home from university.

that was your front door.

he was at your front door.

you jolt awake, ignoring the icky feel of sweat making your clothes cling onto your skin. ice creeps up your spine and freezes you over when you notice with a sinking realization.

those black gates are from the university you attended. that café is your favorite study nook. and that sidewalk is a route you take every day.

you clamp your hands on your mouth as tears roll down your cheeks in rivulets. you pull the comforters up above your head, fear gripping onto you with a vice-like grip as you sob.

it was in the dead of night, moonlight grazing the confines of your room and hours away from dusk. you finally utter those three words in a frightened whisper.

"he's stalking me."

as if having the overgrown bat jaehyun following and annoying you around wasn't enough, you now have another person keeping watch over you. mark lee, unlike jaehyun, may not be as ripped with muscle, but you heard from your cop buddy that the young detective has a few black belts under him. people at the precinct said that if they have to choose one person who can ever come close to the sad face slayer's agility, mark lee's your guy.

"you gotta be shitting me," you mutter, leaning close to jaehyun to whisper like high school girls talking about gossip. "he doesn't look the type!"

jaehyun, in turn, plays along and copies you. "yeah, true. he gets that a lot, i think,"

"guys, i'm literally in the back seat. i can hear everything."

the change hadn't been too drastic. at least mark was there when jaehyun proved to be difficult, pulling him towards the other way when the older male tried waltzing into your class again. "you don't need to sit next to her in her class! are you serious? there's one exit and entrance and we're on the fifth floor. breaking into that classroom will be the end of nakamoto's serial killer career!"

you shoot mark an appreciative smile, one he quickly returned before hauling jaehyun around the hallway. "we'll just be at the canteen, okay? press the 'lil button on your bracelet and we'll be right there!"

shaking your head with a slight smile on your face, you entered the classroom, sat in your usual spot, and did some of your readings from our other class to kill time. you hardly hear the screech of the chair next to you as it was pulled back. not like you cared much for whoever sat down next to you, but you can't deny there's that feeling of missing jaehyun when he used to force his way into the lecture.

"settle down! settle down, people!"

the professor enters and the class begins.

you were meticulous with your note-taking system. it's thorough, leaving no room for information to slip you. having already printed hard copies of the powerpoint presentation and simply jotting down some extra key points mentioned by your professor.

you were just about to raise your hand for a question when you feel something warm graze past your arm. you absentmindedly look down.

the breath is sucked right out of your lungs.

hi, soulmate

there, scribbled with an ominous red crayon on a small piece of paper. it was almost laughable how innocent it looked but when you follow the ring-clad hand, up the black hoodie he's wearing, and finally to his face—

"hi! i'm yuta."

his cheshire smile spikes up your heartbeat. it makes you want to throw up, makes you want to slam your head against the desk. the fight or flight hormone you have is making you restless, eyes pinned on the serial killer sitting next to you, scared that if you avert your gaze, he's going to take out that desert eagle and shoot you until your skull caves in and the bullets in his magazine empties.

"but judging by your reaction, i don't think introductions are needed, hm?" his tone is easy, conversational even and it shoots a freezing jolt of fear right up your spine. it makes you sweat profusely because you don't fucking know what to do, your thoughts in complete and utter disarray.

"just press the little button here and we'll be there before you can even finish shouting 'help!' – hey, i was just kidding! what's with the face?" you swallow, sneakily pressing the button without breaking eye contact with the serial killer sitting in front of you.

"look upfront. now." yuta orders and you nearly snap your neck as you turn your head with lightning speed.

"i thought i was above the soulmate rules, but here we are. my soul is either too tainted or too great to be tied to such trivial things, but oh well, we learn to work with what we have. surprisingly, i learned to like dreaming about how your day went."

you feel something sharp poking at your thigh and when you look down, he has a silver butterfly knife pointed against you. the precision of the angle he held it with doesn't slip your notice. one slice of that knife, no matter how small, and he'll be spilling your guts in this classroom.

a fat tear rolls down your face.

"can you imagine how much my heart broke when i learned you were spying on me? leaking information to that snobby detective? to those incompetent cops? bad baby, that was very bad of you."

"yuta—"

"you think the cops can save you from me?"

his other hand comes in contact with the nape of your neck, holding your head in place as he leaned down to invade your space. he scoffs, and you can picture that terrifying cheshire grin you've seen one too many times in your dreams.

the knife digs through your coat, the tip hardly poking your skin only because he doesn't want to drive it into you yet. how did he even manage to get inside the university? not to mention the weapons he possessed? shouldn't anyone be suspicious when they see a man dressed in all black, clad in jeans and a hoodie, into a university—

he even dressed the part. with that hood drawn up and carrying that one notebook, he looked fairly normal. someone who can easily blend in with the crowd.

you eye your professor, willing him to look at you but your soulmate is having none of that. you squirm when he drives the knife further, at the base of your stomach. with his other hand, he twirls a lock of hair around his finger. "now, now, soulmate. you don't want half the people here to get hurt, do you? unless... that can easily be arranged—"

"no!" you whisper, head jerking to the side to look at him humming in satisfaction. damn. out of all the faces he's seen contorted with fear, yours is his absolute favorite. with those pleading, glassy eyes and parted lips, yuta is tenting in his sweats.

"thought so," he chuckles. "let's get up. we're leaving. that old crook doesn't care if students just up and went in the middle of his lecture."

you don't want to think about how he even knew that because it implied attending the lectures a good amount of times. it's with sinking realization that jaehyun was right. if it weren't for him insisting to sit next to you, nakamoto yuta would've long gotten you in his claws.

you tried gathering your things until he purred into your ear.

"ah, ah, ah. you wouldn't be needing those with where we're going."

the hallways were empty, not that you had much time to scream for help when he had a knife pointed up your back, shoving you into the fire escape stairs. within the tranquil confines of the staircases, the sad face slayer couldn't fucking care less for your personal space.

he disgusts you greatly, he needn't do anything but stand there in front of you but you can already smell the long blood trail from his path. it reeks of rotting flesh and that infuriating god complex he had left a sour aftertaste.

"you know, i genuinely wanted to get to know you," yuta pouts, shaking the hoodie off his head. his hair raven, it's ends kissing the nape of his neck. he looked like he came right out of a shounen manga but the bloodlust in his eyes is something that can never be masked. "i detested the soulmate connection at first, i thought i should just kill you off because you could be my loose end."

his humorless smile is enough to give you nightmares.

"but seeing how sweetly normal and untainted you are made me hold back," the butterfly knife appears before your line of sight, yuta teasingly dragging the tip right down your cheek to trace your tears. "so, why did you snitch, baby?"

you shiver when he noses the side of your neck, inhaling your scent as his other hand hooks underneath your top, freezing fingers making you jolt. when you don't reply, his patience starts to dwindle. then again, he was never a patient man.

"answer me, you bitch. why did you rat me out?" gone is the playful lilt in his voice. the vibrations surge through you as his deep, demanding voice scares you shitless.

you feel, hear, and smell him everywhere. this wasn't like any nightmare. this is real, and you won't magically wake up on your bed, sighing in relief, knowing he isn't there, that it was all just in your head. no, this was very much real and there's absolutely no escape.

"i didn't," your voice cracks. "i didn't mean to—"

"bullshit!" he yells. you wail in pain when he slams you against the wall, head aching as it came in contact with concrete. "because of you betraying me, i nearly fucking got caught, and i never get caught!"

you were full out sobbing at this point, noisy and unsightly as the snot mixes with your tears. your only hope now is he gives you a quick, painless death and that he doesn't carve and mutilate your face like what he always does to his other poor victims. "i'm sorry! please... i'm so sorry. i was scared—"

he coos mockingly, tilting his head to the side as he inched his face closer. "aw, scared? my sweet little soulmate was scared?" he places the blade flat against your neck. as humiliating and degrading as it was, you almost peed on your clothes. "how about now? i'm sure as hell that you're fucking terrified for your useless life right now."

you cringe when his hand abandons the expanse of your stomach, no longer inching higher, finding its purchase on the hair sitting at the crown of your head. he holds you in place like that, forcing your head parallel against the wall, with his whole body pressing up to you that it's nearly suffocating.

"just one quick little slice," he taunts. you hiccuped when you feel the feathery light scrape of the blade moving against your skin. "you won't even have time to scream… but i'm sure we don't want that, do we?"

you forgot how to speak. forgot how to breathe. whenever your mind wanders, you've always thought about how you'll give this killer a piece of your mind, with the amount of fear and sorrow he inflicts upon other people. but you guess realities were a lot more different than expectations. the yuta you dreamed of meeting is in handcuffs, but fate is a fickle little thing.

"do we?" he repeats, slicing ever so slightly at your skin. enough to draw blood in droplets, never a waterfall.

"n – no."

he smiles. "you can make it up to me. do you want to make it up to me?"

the butterfly knife digs even further. a warning. and if you value your useless life, you should be smart enough to know what to answer. drawing a shaky breath, you tried forcing the ends of your lips up to a smile. "of course, yuta."

your voice breaks as your sobbing grips your body whole. the fear consuming your entire being like a parasite consuming the host. you would've shut down altogether if it weren't for the calloused hands gently gripping your face. "i know, i know. i see how regretful you are, baby. don't worry, i won't hurt you. you'll make it up to me."

anyone would be fucking stupid if you believe those words coming from a serial killer.

in your wrecked state, you barely register that he's pushing you down to your knees. skin coming in contact with the freezing linoleum floor as you refuse to look at what his hands are doing. yuta has pocketed his knife. the sound of a belt unbuckling in itself added insult to injury.

you stare blankly at his shoes as he shoves his bottoms down enough for his cock to show. if you squint hard enough, you'll see tiny splatters of blood in the shoelaces. whether or not he feels you're unresponsive, he doesn't show. maybe he doesn't care entirely. he takes one of your hands and used it to wrap around himself. he gasps, sharp, followed by a hiss.

you feel it throbbing and it strengthens the disgust you feel. no way you're going to give him the satisfaction of eye contact when you're already forced to blow this psycho.

"eyes up."

you sniffled, vulnerability present in the tone you speak. "i don't want to. please, don't make me."

if words alone aren't enough for you to follow orders, maybe you'll feel more motivated if held at gunpoint. it's unmistakable, the infamous desert eagle you've only seen in your nightmares. the last thing you ever expected is to be on the side where the bullet comes out.

the barrel is freezing as he digs it into the crown of your head. "soulmate or not. i don't shoot blanks."

your eyes looked up then. glaring as the tears rolled down your face. "you're a monster," you mutter under your breath. where you got the confidence to fight back is unknown.

"i've heard that before, be more creative next time," he holds your hair tight in one grip, shoving you forward, eye-level to his throbbing dick. "now… suck, baby."

"freeze!"

you knew that voice, you've been hearing it for the last two weeks. "jaehyun–!"

yuta cuts you off, shoving the gun into your mouth. the safety clicking off resonating in the tranquil room. it's deafening, and it makes you immobile.

"hands up. step away from the civilian." whether or not mark is nervous as he points the gun at the serial killer, he's doing a damn good job of hiding it.

yuta sighs, exasperated as he throws his head back. his raised arms came down to tuck himself back in his jeans, and the action made jaehyun's calm exterior crack. "i said, hands up, asshole!"

"chill out, motherfucker. i'm just trying to wear my pants." the serial killer hisses, glaring at jaehyun over his shoulder.

"mark, call back up already. what are you doing?" jaehyun mutters, side-eyeing the young detective whose gun shakes as he holds it up. the taller cop takes a step forward, eyes never leaving the notorious killer as he addresses you curtly. "(name), come here."

just as you plant your palms to the ground to push yourself up, one of yuta's hands shoves you down quick as lightning. "no. she stays here, with me."

jaehyun scowls, takes another step forward. "and what makes you think i'm going to let that happen?"

"i don't think. i know."

there's a constant ring in your ear as the gunshot temporarily renders you deaf. you've shut your eyes in utter fright, hands shooting up to cover your ears but it was too late. you refuse to open your eyes, you didn't want to see a dead body lying before you, even if it belonged to a heartless serial killer.

but when your eyes fluttered open, it's not yuta bleeding out on the ground.

"no, this can't be – jaehyun!"

it was a bullet straight to the head, no one could've survived a shot like that. his eyes are empty as he stares at you, unblinking, stoic. the color is yet to drown away from his milky complexion. but you can't even manipulate yourself into thinking that jaehyun's still alive. not when his eyes are empty, not when he just looks so lifeless.

it couldn't have been yuta who pulled the trigger.

his weapons were on the ground and the shot rang too fast. the sad face slayer couldn't have crouched down for his gun to shoot the cop, it would've taken too much time. and among the three men, there's only another person holding a weapon, and that was –

"great shot, mark."

the detective smiles, but with the blood splattered on his face, it looked cold. "told ya i've been practicing."

yuta hauls you up by the arms, addicted to how frail your body feels as it collapses against him. he's finally got his little soulmate in his arms. and he will never, ever let you go.

the cops lost – you've lost.

yuta, with a sense of victory coursing through his veins, took the liberty of trailing little pecks down your neck as he mutters, "mine, mine, mine!" but you couldn't care less about his display of mocked affection. not when the other person meant to protect you, turned out to be everything you think he wasn't.

mark must've felt the gravity of your stare as he crouches before jaehyun's bleeding body. grabbing the fallen cop's gun, he took it upon himself to empty the magazine. the lopsided grin he sends you broke your resolve more than yuta ever could.

"i'm sorry. it's nothing personal."

jenoluck (c) all rights reserved

[stayarmytinyzenmoa-l]

One last Jung sibling spoiler muahahaha:

~

“Why… why are you telling me this?” [???] asks, his hands clasping the edge of the table behind him and a bead of sweat rolling down his face. Kanghoon dragged the cigarette out of his mouth, blowing the smoke away to the side before sighing. He looks to [???] with a pointed glare.

“Because no one will ever believe you,” his head tilts upward with a sneer and [???] gulps harshly. “Go on, tell (Y/N), see if she believes you.”

“You monster!”

“I’m no monster, just a concerned older brother,” Kanghoon places the cigarette between his lips once again, shoving his hands in his pocket.

“So is this a warning?”

“Take it as you will,” Kanghoon gave him no more attention, holding up a gloved hand to bid goodbye before walking the opposite direction.

~

“You… tell me,” Johnny places his hand on Hamin’s shoulder, squeezing it as if to size him up.

“What’s up?” Hamin’s eyes sparkled with curiosity.

“What… what is your PR?”

“For?”

“Everything.”

“Deadlifts 275, curls 100, bench 250, and squats 300,” Hamin beams and Johnny gasps, quickly walking off to Jeno and Jaehyun.

“He’s a fucking monster,” Johnny hisses as Jeno rubs his biceps with a slightly agape jaw.

“I feel like we should’ve expected this,” Jaemin shrugs. “(Y/N) is oddly strong herself, it only makes sense that her brother is as well.”

“Okay but still!” Jeno glances towards you and Hamin, you were handing Hamin a box of cookies, which he devoured instantly as you handed him a cake box.

“Hey, so where’s Kanghoon?” You ask.

“Busy, I think, says he’ll be here later,” Hamin says after inhaling a cake piece.

“Now who’s Kanghoon?!” Jeno asks. Yeseul clears her throat next to Jaehyun.

“The elusive eldest,” she says with a distant look.

[smoll-tangerine]

cerca trova

PAIRING. journalist!jaehyun x heiress/socialite!reader/oc GENRES. slice of life, friendship, drama, romance, college!au WORDS: 31.1k 

SYNOPSIS. cerca trova is an italian phrase that translates to “seek and you shall find”. it is also the name of an exclusive and elusive club at seoul national university. yet, there has never been concrete and solid proof that the club actually exists.

it has been officially a year since jaehyun started researching on this secret society and came up without any leads. until he accidentally bumped into a girl in a lion mask and a ball gown—quite literally.

PLAYLIST. sanctuary by joji • levitating by dua lipa • painkiller by ruel • my favourite clothes by rini • thick and thin by lany • blue by keshi • yellow by coldplay • like i want you by giveon • just the two of us by grover washington jr • mariposa by peach tree rascals

TAGLIST. @sehunniepot @plump-peach @jeongyoonohs @junghoe​ @crescent-iak

[a/n]: first of all, happy birthday angie!! i can’t believe that i managed to finish this right on your birthday, lol. if you got here first, i will also be updating he’s a man just for you uwu. hope you’re going to have a wonderful day and i miss you so much!! ♥

now, about the one-shot -- when i first started it, i expected to have romance as the main genre, but as i continued, the romance became more subdued and subtle so i apologize in advance to those who expected this to be heavy romance-oriented. cerca trova is a story that focuses a lot on the slice of life genre, college struggles and what-not. 

i was also heavily inspired by an episode of gilmore girls, but the rest of the plot is created by yours truly. with that said, enjoy lovelies! ♥ 

“It’s about time you give up on this story, Jung,” the editor-in-chief of his school’s paper, Taeil, told him with a tired sigh. It wasn’t news to anyone part of the paper that Jaehyun had been looking for clues about a famous yet secretive club of Seoul National University.

To be precise, it has been exactly a year since he heard of this club, Cerca Trova. It meant Seek and you shall find. It was rather ironic in Jaehyun’s situation. But when he accidentally stumbled upon some back issues of the paper and on an article that ended up with a cold lead, it sparked something in him and he was determined to find the truth.

He spent the whole summer gathering past information at the university. But it still wasn’t enough. Cerca Trova was a club that no one has really seen. And Jaehyun didn’t doubt that its members were unlikely to show themselves in front of him voluntarily.

Unless he found them first.

But who could possibly be part of this secret society that no one has ever seen?

“I swear I’ll be able to write it for the next upcoming issue,” Jaehyun told the older male fiercely, but his chief only raised an eyebrow at him, questioning the integrity of his leads. It was right of Taeil to doubt him. After all, his leads were never concrete, but purely theoretical with no actual proof backing them up.

“Tell you what, I’ll assign you the feature,” Taeil concurred—he knew how stubborn Jaehyun was—while the latter pumped his fist up in joy. “But, you’re going to have a backup article, as well, in case you don’t have every information needed for the secret society piece. I still need a feature printed out by next month.”

“Yes, I won’t disappoint you!” Jaehyun shouted before running back to his desk and started writing notes and bits of information.

It didn’t take long for his friends to hound around his desk.

“Barely a week back to school and you’re already on Taeil’s ass about the secret society piece?” Ten said and nodded approvingly. “Brave soldier.”

“Jae, I still don’t understand why you’re so obsessed with this club,” Jungwoo chimed in. “What’s so interesting about a secret society, anyway?”

“Exactly!” Jaehyun retorted back. “Because it’s secret. And as human beings, we hate being in the dark—hate not knowing the unknown. People will want to know more about it as soon as I have all the basics covered of not what this club is, but what they do.”

“Yeah, but it’s been a year since you’ve been on this case and you still have nothing,” Doyoung said with a small wince.

“I’m close, I’m telling you,” Jaehyun muttered as he ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “I just need an insider.”

Ten frowned and gave him a look. “You still haven’t found one?”

“Easier said than done,” Jaehyun replied with a look. “Do you think I’d still be on this piece after a year if I had an insider?”

“Touché,” Ten said with raised arms. “What have you got so far?”

Jaehyun had a guilty look on his face as he rubbed his temples roughly. “Don’t tell Taeil but honestly? Basically nothing.”

“Face it, Jaehyun,” Doyoung said with a sigh. “Cerva Trova is an urban legend at SNU, something to make other people think that nerds like us actually have cool people and a social life outside of GPAs and what-nots.”

“So, what’s your backup?” Jungwoo added. “Taeil asked you for a backup feature, right?”

Jaehyun stayed silent and refused to meet his friends’ eyes.

“Aaannd he has no backup,” Doyoung muttered. “Taeil is going to kick your ass if you come up with nothing by the deadline.”

But Jaehyun was adamant and would do anything to be able to write this feature. “I know. Call me crazy but I’ve got this gut feeling that I’m about to hit the jackpot or something, so I’ll stick with this for now.”

“You should take a break, Jaehyun-ah,” Ten advised him, worry evident in his face. “Don’t push yourself too hard. There’s more to life than our newspaper, you know? Take it easy.”

Jaehyun hummed while his friends weren’t sure whether he had heard Ten or not. They looked at each other at the same time and shrugged. They then each gave a comforting pat on Jaehyun’s back before retreating to their respective desks.

They knew there wasn’t any point in trying to convince Jaehyun otherwise.

A few hours later, Jaehyun tried not to growl in frustration as he downed his cup of coffee to find it empty. He groaned to himself and swivelled his chair around to ask his desk mate Doyoung if the latter wanted to grab another cup of caffeine with him, to only realize that everyone in the newsroom was gone except for him.

He sighed and rubbed his face as he got up to leave. Jaehyun closed up the office and decided to pass by the bathroom to freshen himself up before he abruptly bumped into someone.

“Oof,” he grunted as he almost fell onto the ground.

He raised his head to apologize to only take a few steps back when he saw a girl—at least, he thought it was a girl—in a pink gown and a giant plastic lion mask. Jaehyun wasn’t sure whether he was starting to see things due to his lack of sleep or numerous intake of caffeine. Either way, he told himself that maybe he should start laying off the iced Americanos and start sleeping more soon.

“Oopsie! I’m so sorry,” the girl said with a small giggle and sounded slightly toasted. “Are you okay?”

And for some reason, she sounded oddly familiar.

“Uh,” Jaehyun stuttered before he answered, almost in a daze, “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Okay, great,” the girl exclaimed. “Have a great night!”

Jaehyun blinked repeatedly. “Oh, yes, you too?”

The girl curtsied as best as she could in her drunken state before departing the hall. Jaehyun scratched his head, unsure whether what he had seen was right, and decided to follow the girl. He was also worried about her state of mind.

By the time he had reached the exit, Jaehyun heard the girl exclaim loudly, “Memento vivere!” before hearing a round of shushes coming from inside the limousine as she entered the vehicle. He immediately took note of that in his cellphone and called it a night before walking back to his dorm room with a little giddiness.

He hadn’t the faintest clue of what he had just seen but Jaehyun had a feeling that this was exactly the jackpot he has been waiting for.

“Anybody knows if he actually went back to his dorm or not?” Doyoung muttered as he, Jungwoo, and Ten stared worriedly at Jaehyun from afar.

“So, do we ask him what’s going on, or not?” Ten quipped and stole a glance over at his younger friend. “I’m getting worried.”

“Looks like we’re not the only ones,” Jungwoo added before motioning their editor-in-chief who was approaching Jaehyun’s desk at an alarming speed.

“Jaehyun, listen, you’re a good friend of mine, and frankly, one of our paper’s best writers,” Taeil said with an awkward laugh. “But–”

The younger male raised a hand, silently asking for a moment as he typed something up on his computer, and turned around to face Taeil with the brightest smile the editor-in-chief had seen him sported since the beginning of the semester.

“Did I miss something?” the editor asked. “Or did you have too much coffee, instead? You know, I noticed that–”

“No, I finally have a lead for the feature!” Jaehyun exclaimed happily. For once, Taeil was glad to see that his friend’s adrenaline rush wasn’t due to his obsession with iced Americanos.

The chief editor’s eyes widened in disbelief. “Really? Tell me everything!”

“Okay, so yesterday night, maybe around 11 o’clock–”

“Wait, you stayed in the newsroom until 11?”

“Not the point.” Jaehyun waved his comment aside. “Anyway, as I was saying, yesterday night, as I left the newsroom and headed to the bathroom, I bumped into a girl.”

Taeil raised a questioning brow but didn’t comment further, waiting for his friend to continue with the story.

“But, get this—the girl was wearing a ball gown and a lion mask,” Jaehyun recounted to him. “So, being the full-fledged journalist that I am with my tingling investigating senses acting up, I decided to follow the girl.”

“Slightly stalker-ish,” Taeil commented with a frown but was intrigued with Jaehyun’s story. “But, go on.”

“I followed the girl out and she said this phrase, ‘memento vivere’, before entering a luxurious black limousine. I took note of it and decided to search it up and guess what?”

“What?”

“Turns out it was a phrase frequently used by a certain secret club at our university.”

Taeil’s eyes widened. “Shut up! So, you found an actual lead?”

Jaehyun tried not to be offended by the older guy’s choice of words—the latter wasn’t exactly lying either, though. “Yes, well, turns out that was the key to everything.” He turned his computer screen towards Taeil and pointed at the picture displayed. “Look what I found in our archives.”

The screen displayed a black-and-white picture showing a group of young people—university students, most likely—dressed up in Victorian outfits and jumping off a what seemed to be a small bridge into a pond with umbrellas in their hands. Underneath the picture lied a description that said Memento vivere.

“Huh, interesting,” Taeil muttered under his breath.

“Found this 1970 edition of our paper,” Jaehyun proudly boasted. “An article on whether this club actually exists or not.”

Taeil gave him a proud pat on the back. “Continue the good work.”

Jaehyun nodded his head and went back to his computer. His three friends immediately crowded around him and began interrogating him.

“You found a lead?” Doyoung said, almost in shock. “What is it?”

Jaehyun motioned the screen with his chin and used his mouse to circle a certain male on a new photo. “This is the only identified person on the picture. Suh Youngil… I wonder why his name sounds so familiar.”

“Dude.” Jungwoo gave him a dead-stare, clearly not impressed. “That’s Suh Johnny’s grandfather.”

Jaehyun raised his brows. “So…?”

“So?” Jungwoo repeated incredulously and continuously tapped the screen where the words Memento vivere were displayed. “Cerca Trova is a secret club that everyone knows about yet don’t know about. Super exclusive, as you mentioned countless of times.”

“Right.”

“Meaning, membership spans from the beginning of time,” Ten mumbled, almost in awe. “Dude, you just uncovered one of their secret sayings and proof that Johnny Suh’s grandfather was in it.”

Jaehyun’s eyes widened upon the realization. “Which means that Johnny’s father was in it. Which should mean that he’s in it too!”

“Bingo!” Doyoung exclaimed with sparkling eyes. “Say, aren’t you close with him since you two host the school’s radio show together? What was it called again? NCT–”

“–Night, Night,” Jaehyun completed his sentence. He immediately clicked on print and punched a fist in the air as he got up from his chair to retrieve the picture. “I’ll catch you guys, later. I’ve got an heir to interview.”

“You mean, interrogate.”

Jaehyun waved from behind as he left the office with the picture in his hands. “Same thing!”

He was about to greet his friend Johnny when he realized that the latter was with a female friend. They didn’t seem to have noticed him yet. Jaehyun wondered whether he should reschedule this meeting but thought that the matter was too pressing.

“Hey, Jaehyun!” Johnny greeted him with a handshake when the former realized that he arrived near their dorm building, where they had agreed to meet up. “Just got your text,” he informed him as he wiggled his phone in the air. “What was so urgent that we can’t talk about it before our broadcast tomorrow?”

Johnny was known throughout their campus for three things: his good looks, his tall height, and his social status. Those three aspects combined made him one of the most famous students at their university, not to mention his family owned a chain of hotels and donated quite a bit of money to their university. And if Jaehyun had to be honest, he was surprised that he was able to befriend such a person.

“Uh…” Jaehyun stuttered as his eyes fleeted towards the girl standing next to Johnny. She raised an amused brow at him though he couldn’t decipher her expression more than this at the moment.

“Oh, she’s cool, don’t worry,” Johnny reassured him before introducing them to each other. The girl then gave him her name, which sounded oddly familiar to him.

“Have we met before?” she asked him with a small tilt of her head.

Jaehyun wracked his brain trying to associate her face and her voice to a memory. He didn’t want to seem rude to one of Johnny’s friends. But there was just something about her that rang a bell in his head, but his mind was mostly preoccupied with the picture of Johnny’s grandfather.

“Oh, wait, we have Visual Anthropology and Macroeconomics together, right?”

Realization hit upon Jaehyun and he eagerly nodded at her words, but there was still something else nagging at him. Though, that was an issue to be dealt with, at a later time. Now, he needed to confront his friend about the article he found.

“So, Johnny, I was looking for you because I’m currently writing this article,” Jaehyun informed him. “You remember how I was stuck on this feature for over a year? The one about the secret society called Cerva Trova at SNU?”

The girl chimed in, “There’s a secret society at SNU?”

Johnny snickered. “My exact reaction when Jaehyun first told me about it.”

Jaehyun ignored their comments and continued, “Well, in order to make my article more, you know, legit, I need an insider—someone part of the club. So, I thought, why not my friend Johnny?!”

There was an awkward silence that passed between them after Jaehyun uttered the last three words. Jaehyun got to give it to his friend, Johnny’s poker face was great and his expression didn’t reveal anything that was going on inside of him.

“Me?” Johnny blurted. “I’m part of a secret society?”

“Damn, Johnny,” the girl commented with a disappointed groan. “Where the hell was my invite? I want to be part of a secret society too.”

“Sorry, dude,” his friend said with a half-smile. “The only club that I’m part of is the radio broadcast.”

Jaehyun didn’t want it to come down to this. But his pride as a journalist and the idea of an angry Taeil made him do the one thing he told himself he would never do as a journalist.

Because desperate times called for desperate measures.

“Well, I mean,” Jaehyun took out the picture he had printed earlier on and showed it to his taller friend, “how can you explain this, then?”

Blackmailing.

The female in their little group giggled as she peered at the piece of paper with great interested in her eyes. “Wait, no way. Is that Grandpa Suh? It doesn’t look like him. This man looks way too hot for him to be your grandfather.”

Johnny shot a small glare over at his friend, which didn’t go unnoticed by Jaehyun. The girl rolled her eyes in response. Johnny then folded the paper and tucked it away in his bag.

“I have more of those on my computer, so I guess you can keep it,” Jaehyun added cheekily.

Jaehyun had known Johnny since his first year with them being the DJs of their campus radio station. The taller male had always been someone nonchalant, easygoing, and radiating with positive energy and cheerfulness. In the three years he had known Johnny, this was the first time he ever felt intimidated by the latter.

He also knew that Johnny was the heir to a famous chain of hotels in the country, and the little group of friends he hung out with were part of the same social group. Jaehyun tried not to glance over at the girl with him. Was she an heiress to a major company too?

“I’m sorry to say that I have no clue of what you’re talking about, Jaehyun,” Johnny replied and scratched his head. “Both of us have class to go to now, so I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Jaehyun bit his bottom lip and nodded. He thought the picture was a good incentive to get Johnny to be his insider. But even if he had a picture of Johnny’s grandfather, it did nothing to help his case. He needed Johnny to bring him on the inside. 

The picture of Suh Youngil was just a possibility and a fact that had never been confirmed. An article without proof and evidence to back it up would just end up being a cheap article, a catty one. And he didn’t want his feature to become a conspiracy column or worse, a gossip one.

“Bye, Jaehyun!” the girl said in a sing-song way with a small wave of her hands as Johnny dragged her by the arm, almost angrily.

Johnny had to meet up with someone before our Statistics class, so I decided to keep him company while we waited for his friend to arrive. According to him, the matter was urgent. I shrugged in response when Johnny told me about it. It wasn’t like I was about to head to class without him.

“Hey, Jaehyun!” Johnny exclaimed before doing a handshake with the other male. I titled my head in curiosity. SNU’s campus was big, for sure, but here I thought I knew all the cute boys from our university.

The boy named Jaehyun looked familiar to me. There was something about his height, his voice, and his aura that rang some bells in my head, but I couldn’t pinpoint it exactly.

“Just got your text,” Johnny informed him. “What was so urgent that we can’t talk about it before our podcast tomorrow?”

Huh, so he was part of the radio broadcasting club with Johnny. I wondered why Johnny hadn’t told me anything about this friend of his.

I continued to stare at Jaehyun’s profile, trying to figure out just where exactly I had seen him before. My guts knew that I had met him before. But, where exactly?

“Uh…”

My eyes widened in recognition—that stutter.

He was the guy I bumped into yesterday night when I was slightly drunk. During the rookies’ initiation night.

Jaehyun’s ears reddened as he finally noticed the attention that I was giving him and I raised an amused brow when he glanced over at my direction.

“Oh, she’s cool, don’t worry,” Johnny quipped before introducing me to his friend. Jaehyun then repeated my name before introducing himself to me.

I liked the way my name rolled off from his tongue.

I tilted my head when he looked a bit puzzled as if he had heard of my name somewhere. And now that I thought about it, I did recall sharing a few classes with him but never went out of my way to socialize with him. After all, we didn’t exactly run in the same social circle. But I guess now I had a reason to, though.

“Have we met before?” I asked in a teasing tone.

I could already see Johnny rolling his eyes at me from the back of my head. Although my question was completely harmless and meant to come out as flirty, I doubted that he would recognize me as the girl he bumped into yesterday night without my lion mask on. But I wasn’t about to reveal that to him.

Jaehyun seemed taken aback with my question and seemed to ponder hard on it. I tried not to giggle at his efforts. It was rare to see such a genuine and innocent guy like Jaehyun in our world. In mine and Johnny’s. No wonder Johnny liked him. If he didn’t, I doubted that Johnny would even bother remembering his name.

“Oh, wait, we have Visual Anthropology and Macroeconomics, together, right?” I said, sparing him from an awkward situation.

Jaehyun’s mouth formed an ‘o’ and nodded eagerly upon the realization. But he didn’t seem too preoccupied with our mutual classes and cut straight to the chase.

“So, Johnny, I was looking for you because I’m currently writing this article,” he then said. “You remember how I was stuck on this feature since my first year? The one about the secret society called Cerca Trova at SNU?”

I tried not to show how intrigued I was by his statement.

Well, this certainly was getting interesting.

“There’s a secret society at SNU?” I chimed in, fascinated. I wondered how Jaehyun even got this information and how was he going to proceed with this. I could feel Johnny radiating some of his anxiety which was why I decided to intervene.

My friend seemed relieved by my help and faked a snicker. “My exact reaction when Jaehyun first told me about it.”

Jaehyun ignored us. “Well, in order to make my article more, you know, legit, I need an insider—someone part of the club. So, I thought, why not my friend Johnny?!”

I admit, I was slightly taken aback with Jaehyun’s accusation – if I could call it that. It wasn’t the fact that he pinpointed Johnny as a member of the secret society that dumbfounded me. It was how confident he was about his theory.

I glanced over at my tall friend who sported the same expression as I did, but I could tell there were a few cracks in his perfected mask. Perhaps Jaehyun couldn’t see it, but I could. Johnny was an easy person to read if you looked beyond his charisma and optimism.

“Me?” Johnny finally replied. “I’m part of a secret society?”

I tried not to roll my eyes at his belated response. I mentally sighed and continued to provide my support to him. After all, if Johnny cracked under the pressure, then the other members and I could be affected too.

“Damn, Johnny,” I exclaimed with a disappointed groan. “Where the hell was my invite? I want to be part of a secret society too.”

Ugh, this giant owed me big time.

“Sorry, dude,” Johnny said with a half-smile. “The only club that I’m part of is the radio broadcast.”

Jaehyun did not seem to be bothered by Johnny’s refute. “Well, I mean,” he said as he took out what seemed to be a piece of paper and showed it to us. “How can you explain this, then?”

I peered over Johnny’s tall shoulder and unintentionally let out a small giggle when I realized who was the man in the picture. “Wait, no way. Is that Grandpa Suh? It doesn’t look like him. This man looks way too hot for him to be your grandfather.”

But what amused me even more was how desperate Jaehyun was for an insider. To the point where he was willing to blackmail Johnny with a photo of his grandfather taken during his time spent part of Cerca Trova. Our motto Memento Vivere splattered across the picture.

We had countless of journalists from our university’s newspaper trying to hunt us down and write a feature on us, but never had one of them even came close with actual proof, let alone figure out its members. I wondered how did he even find this picture.

Actually, I was curious how this photo ended up with the newspaper club to begin with.

I could tell that Johnny was sweating bullets since the proof handed to us was a picture of his grandfather.

Johnny didn’t seem to appreciate my comment as he subtly glared at me. I actually rolled my eyes this time. I thought that he was freaking out over nothing. A picture of Johnny’s grandfather was just the tip of the iceberg. If Jaehyun truly wanted to uncover everything there was about Cerca Trova, then he still had a long way to go.

“I have more of those on my computer, so I guess you can keep it,” Jaehyun added with a cheeky smile.

I was starting to like this guy more and more. But I could also tell that Johnny was liking Jaehyun’s presence less and less. Johnny’s friendly demeanour just diminished the slightest, meaning he was slowly getting annoyed and frustrated with this conversation.

Suh Youngho might be an easygoing person, but even I wouldn’t want to cross him whenever he was irritated.

“I’m sorry to say that I have no clue of what you’re talking about, Jaehyun,” Johnny slowly said and scratched his head. “Both of us have class to go to now, so I’ll see you tomorrow?”

I unknowingly pouted, a tad saddened that I couldn’t spend more time getting to know Jaehyun.

He bit his bottom lip and nodded at Johnny. My friend mirrored his actions before walking off towards the building where our Statistics class was held and dragged me along fiercely while muttering curse words under his breath.

I snorted at Johnny’s actions and bade Jaehyun good-bye with a small wave of my hand, ignoring Johnny in the process. “Bye, Jaehyun!”

Jaehyun waved back at me, an indescribable expression on his face, and I turned to the front. I instantly pried Johnny’s hand from my arm and whined when I saw how red it was. “What the hell, Suh? You didn’t have to grab me that hard.”

“Shit, shit, shit!” He fast-walked as he ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “How did he get that picture?”

I tried to keep up with his speed. Damn him and his long legs. “Why don’t you—oh, I don’t know—ask him about it?”

He suddenly halted in his steps and turned to me with an angry, almost accusatory stare. “It’s called a secret society for a reason.”

I shrugged. “You didn’t really let him explain, either. Maybe he just wanted to write an article on us without revealing everything.” My brows furrowed. “Isn’t he your friend? Perhaps you should give him the benefit of the doubt.”

Johnny was the one to roll his eyes this time. “Oh, keep it in your pants, would you? You’re always like this when a pretty boy is in the picture.”

I bat my eyelashes at him, faking an innocence air with the best of my abilities. “Whatever do you mean?”

He narrowed his eyes at me before shaking his head. We continued our walk to our class.

“I mean–”

“Don’t. Even. Think. About. It.” Johnny’s glare was fiercer than ever as he muttered those words to me through gritted teeth.

Intimidated was the last thing I felt at the moment. I knew how Johnny could be whenever he was pissed, but he was still far from reaching his limit. And besides, seeing him act this way made my day too. I enjoyed pissing him off.

Let’s just say it was payback for all those times he used to pull on my pigtails when we were kids.

“Well, we live in a democratic society for a reason, don’t we?” I refuted cheekily. “We’ll put it on a vote with the council.”

Johnny scoffed. “The council will never agree to it.”

“Well,” I smiled mysteriously at him, “good thing the President can veto any decision the council makes.”

“That’s a complete abuse of power!” he whined as we entered our classroom and settled in our respective seats. “Don’t do this just because you’re interested in a boy. I mean, you got plenty of other options! Does it have to be that one guy who is determined to uncover our club?”

I rested my chin on the palm of my hand and grinned at him sweetly. “Well, weren’t you the one who said that he was just so pretty?” I then returned my attention back to the front when the professor started the class. “And besides, he seems nice.”

Johnny seemed flabbergasted by my statement. “What? Don’t tell me you’re actually considering him as a potential boyfriend?”

I shrugged. “I don’t see why I cannot be interested in him.”

He stayed silent and took out his class notes. “You being interested in him isn’t the issue. The real question is, why would he be interested in you?”

I gasped dramatically and punched his arm. “You take that back! I am a very desirable woman, thank you very much.”

He rolled his eyes as he rubbed the sore spot on his arm. “You know that’s not what I mean. I meant, would he still want to be with you if he were to step into our world. I mean, I’m all for the Princess and the Pauper storyline, but would he be able to deal with it?”

I frowned at his words. I never thought about it that far even though I should have since that was always something that prevented me from getting myself in an actual relationship. And besides, even if I started dating Jaehyun, I doubted that it would become so serious that I would introduce him to my family. I’d never reached that stage in any of my past relationships. So, I wasn’t too worried either way.

“Johnny, that’s not how the Prince and the Pauper story goes.”

“Really? That’s your takeaway from everything that I just told you?”

I groaned. “Relax. I get what you mean. But, right now, you’re being way too serious for my taste.”

“Well, a little warning never hurt anyone.”

I stared dead at him, unimpressed. “Look, Youngho, we still have—like, what?—barely a year of freedom before graduating? Before we have to work our ass up the social and economic hierarchy of our family’s company? You know that not any one of us is searching for anything serious during our time in university. Why else did we even join Cerca Trova? John, what’s our club motto?”

“Memento Vivere.”

“And what does it mean?”

“Remember to live.”

“Exactly.” I grinned at him. “Remember to live. This is our time—not our parents’ or our family elders’. This is the only time we get that they cannot control. If I want to date a guy that they don’t approve, this is the only time I’ll get.”

Johnny’s lips thinned as if miffed by something I said. “But… what if you fall for Jaehyun? Like, really fall for him? You’d break up with him if your parents ask you to?”

My hands unconsciously clenched at his question and quickly reverted my eyes back to the classroom’s blackboard.

“Youngho, you should know that in our world, getting to pick the person with whom we want to spend the rest of our life, is one of the few luxuries we cannot afford.”

I leaned back against my armchair as I watched the scene unfold before me. We were a chaotic bunch, that was for sure, but today’s order of the day sent my friends in a rampage. As Johnny had suspected from beginning, the council wasn’t too keen about my suggestion.

Our weekly meetings were held at my house since I was the President. It was tradition to play billiard during the meetings. I didn’t know who started it, but at times, I would resent that person only because the games would become too rowdy for my taste. Not exactly due to the game itself but because it was already difficult enough for us to come to a mutual decision.

And adding competitive people to the mix didn’t help much.

“I think it wouldn’t do us any harm if that journalist writes an article about our club,” Taeyong, one of my closest friends said as he leaned against the side of my chair, his cue stick under his armpit as he kept his arms crossed across his torso.

I looked up at him with a huge smile. “My point exactly, thank you. I always knew why you’re my favourite out of everyone here.”

“Wow, gee, it’s not like your childhood best friend is in the same room or anything,” Johnny commented from the corner.

I rolled my eyes. “Get over it, Youngho.”

Seulgi, the only other girl who was an executive member, piped up. “Well, Taeyong has a point. As long as he follows our conditions, I don’t see why an article about our club cannot be published.”

Hendery wailed in disapproval. “It destroys our club’s whole mystique! The whole beauty about Cerca Trova is that nobody knows if it actually exists. To publish a feature about us will confirm our existence. And once our existence is confirmed, then there’s nothing appealing about the club anymore! It’s just going to be like any one of those lame clubs out there!”

“Why do you insist on allowing this journalist to write a feature on us, anyway?” Sicheng, who usually remained neutral in these types of situation, asked with a curious smile as he poised himself to play.

“Knowing our dear President,” Johnny drawled, “is that really a question you can’t answer yourself?”

Sicheng snorted before hitting one of the billiard balls. “Forget I asked. My vote is a no.”

“Well, other than ruining our club’s mystique,” I said as I gave a pointed look to Hendery, who stuck out his tongue at me, “are there any other reasons why we can’t let Jaehyun write an article about us?”

The opposition remained silent.

“He has proof that my grandfather was in it!” Johnny asserted with a certain glint in his eyes. “If he publishes that photo, then it gets back to me.”

I huffed through my nose. “That’s a weak-ass excuse and you know it. And besides, worst comes to worst, we’ll make him sign a gag order.”

“A gag order?” Hendery’s brows raised in surprise. “You’re willing to go that far just for a puny university newspaper?”

“You three are the ones who are worried about getting exposed by this puny university newspaper,” Seulgi muttered as it was her turn to play.

“And besides,” I continued cunningly, “he’s the one who needs us more than we need him. I’m certain he’d be willing to accept whatever conditions we might impose on him.”

The ones who were at first reluctant to allow this, now seemed to have warmed up to the idea.

“Hey, are you going to pass on this round, as well?” Taeyong asked me as it was finally my turn to play.

I hummed as I got up from my seat and cracked my back before grabbing my cue stick from the wall. I walked up to the pool table and looked at my friends with a proposition in mind. “How about this? I win this last round, and we’ll go with whatever decision I make.”

Johnny crossed his arms and pondered about my deal. “And if you lose?”

“Then the matter will be forgotten and will never be brought up again.” I tilted my head at the three. “So, what do you say, boys? Care to have a wager with me?”

All five of them peered over at the pool table to figure out where the black eight ball was. That was the ball I needed to hit into a pocket to win the game. And it was a ball that was nearly impossible to hit. One bad shot and I’d lose the wager.

“You’re on,” Hendery said with a small snort.

I positioned myself where I thought it was best to hit the cue ball and leaned down with my left eye closed as I was right-hand dominant. When I got the angle down, I hit the cue ball with a soft thud of the tip of my cue stick. I rose from my position and looked at the white ball roll towards the black one. Everyone in the room held their breath as they waited for the final result.

The cue ball hit the black one and the latter slowly rolled towards one of the pockets, before ultimately falling into it.

“And that’s how you win, boys.”

Johnny mumbled something incoherent. Although they could be sore losers at some times, they always honoured their side of the bargain.

“Alright, write down the conditions and send it to Taeyong,” I ordered as I placed back my cue stick back on the cue rack on the wall. 

“Is he going to shadow us until the end of the year?” Seulgi asked.

Johnny shook his head. “Nah, he mentioned it was for a feature. Seeing that the newspaper only releases an issue once a month, I’d say he needs his article before the end of next month.”

“I’ll only allow him to shadow us during one event and that’s it,” Sicheng demanded. “Take it or leave it.”

“I agree,” I said, surprising Sicheng. “And what better way to show him the true essence of Cerca Trova than to invite him to our annual Victorian retreat?”

Hendery groaned. “The other members won’t approve of this.”

“Well, one, they’re not an executive member so I don’t give a rat’s ass about what they think,” I replied, slightly irritated. The decision was already made, and they lost fair and square. I didn’t understand why they still tried to make up excuses. “And two, if they’re not happy with the decision, they’re free to leave. They already signed a gag order when they first joined so I’m not worried either.”

I raised a brow at him, directing my comment at him. Hendery seemed to have gotten my message and sighed in resignation. But I didn’t like seeing my friends in a bad mood either. And since I was the selfish one who made the request, it would be unreasonable of me to not give them another compromise.

“I’ll take full responsibility,” I said, hoping that it’ll relieve those initially opposed of some of their worries—whatever they may be. “If this whole thing turns out to be disastrous, I’ll resign from my position as President and quit the club. Is that enough collateral for you guys to stop getting on my last nerve?”

They simultaneously nodded at my question.

“Alright, you guys handle the details and I’ll take care of the journalist,” I instructed. “Our weekly meeting is now adjourned.”

It was only a week later, when the executives have finally completed their list of demands, that I was able to speak to Jaehyun about his article. Given that our shared classes were both at the end of the week, I figured that finding him in the newsroom would be more efficient.

“Uh, Jaehyun, you have a visitor?” one of its club members shouted back into the room while looking back at me with something similar to panic.

I saw Jaehyun jogging up to the newsroom’s entrance. “Yeah, what’s up, Doyoung?”

The guy named Doyoung pointed at me and whispered to him, “You know her?”

I saw Jaehyun’s brows furrowed as he turned to who was his friend pointing at. They immediately shot up in surprise as he stuttered out my name and asked, “W-what are you doing here?”

“Hiya!” I said brightly with a wiggle of my fingers. “I’m here for you, silly!”

“For me?” he replied, confusion present in the face he was making. “What for?”

For an aspiring journalist, he sure was dafter than I expected.

“For our Macroeconomics project, of course!” I said with a tight smile, hoping that his friend wouldn’t catch on. “You know, the one that’s due on the same day as your article of your secret society piece? You mentioned that you wanted to work on it so that you can focus the rest of your time on the article.”

If by now, Jaehyun didn’t catch my drift, then I’d give up.

Thankfully, he did and enthusiastically nodded to his friend. “Oh, right. Right!”

His friend, Doyoung, frowned. “Wait, I thought we were going to do the Macro project together?”

I laughed awkwardly. “Did I say Macro? I meant to say Visual Anthropology! I must have mixed those two up since we’re both in the same class.”

“Yes!” Jaehyun, thankfully, went along with my bit. “She meant the Visual Anthropology one.

“Right,” I repeated, my awkward smile still intact.

“Okay…” Doyoung said with a weird look on his face. “I’ll leave you two to it, then.”

Jaehyun turned to me with the most confused expression I’d ever seen. I winked at him as I beckoned him to follow me. “Let’s go somewhere quieter.”

That was how we ended up in the university’s library, pretending to peruse the Anthropology section.

“We’re not actually here for our project, right?” Jaehyun asked with an awkward yet somewhat nervous chuckle. “Am I reading this wrong completely?”

“Jaehyun, we’re not even actually on the same team.”

“Oh, right.” He seemed taken aback and he rubbed the back of his neck. “So, why did you want to see me, then?”

My eyes blinked, my only visible reaction to his question, as I wondered whether he was really this oblivious when he managed to uncover one of our club’s alumni.

And speaking of that– 

“How did you come to the conclusion that Johnny’s grandfather was part of this secret society that you were talking about?”

His brow twitched just the slightest at my question. The kids could hate me all they want for accepting Jaehyun within our ranks, even temporarily, but as President, I still felt the responsibility to assure that this would never happen again—that no one could uncover us as easily as this guy.

So, you could say that I also had my own ulterior motives behind approaching Jaehyun other than the one that Johnny had mentioned.

“Why do you ask?” he asked inquisitively. “A real journalist never reveals his sources.”

I exhaled deeply through my nose. This was going to be harder than I thought.

“Well, Johnny isn’t going to help you anytime soon, but we are family friends. I’ve known Grandpa Suh since I was a kid.” I grinned mischievously. “I’m sure he doesn’t mind doing me a favour or two.”

He narrowed his eyes at me. “What’s in it for you?”

“What, indeed.” I huffed, keeping my amused expression on. “How about you entertain my question, first?”

He continued to stare at me, unblinking, before he sighed in resignation as he recalled, “I’ve bumped into this girl in a pink ball gown and a lion mask a couple of nights ago. Completely toasted. I’m not even sure if she remembers me.”

So, it all started from that night?

“It was dead in the middle of the night. I was probably one of the few left in the building, so you could imagine my surprise when I literally crashed into her. I thought that I was hallucinating for a second. But, then I decided to follow her. I mean, what was the harm in doing so?”

I nodded, silently asking him to go on.

“I then saw her heading inside a limousine as she shouted Memento vivere,” he continued. “I thought it was weird so I decided to search it up. And the phrase surprisingly came up in the search results of our newspapers archive. Scrolled through the results all night and found this picture in one of our back issues.”

Bingo.

Although I was satisfied that with the results of my interrogation, I felt slightly guilty that I was perhaps the reason why Jaehyun was able to come this far with his research. Granted that the right timing and luck had a lot to do with it as well, but it didn’t change the fact that he was a witness and he clearly remembered the words that I had proudly proclaimed in the middle of the night.

Even if I was slightly drunk, that was still rather reckless of me.

Taking responsibility in this situation was all I could do.

“I see,” I said and held a finger up, “give me a minute to reply to this text.”

I immediately forwarded all the pertinent information to Taeyong. You know what to do, I typed. He replied with a thumbs-up emoji. I then pocketed my phone back into my bag and took out an envelope that our club had specially prepared.

“Well, Jaehyun, today must be your lucky day!”

“Uh, w-why?”

“Because,” I confided, “I’m that girl you’ve bumped into.”

The surprise that washed over his face was worth all the backlash I’ve received from my friends. His mouth opened and closed and gaped like a goldfish. A very cute one.

But Jaehyun quickly regained his composure and cleared his throat. “Prove it.”

I scoffed incredulously, though I did admire him a little bit for his daringness. “Prove it?” I repeated with blinking eyes and crossed arms. “Shouldn’t I say that to you?”

“W-well–”

“Either way, it’s up to you whether you want to believe me or not,” I cut him off, “but as the President of this secret society you have been after for so long, I’m here to offer you a proposition.”

“A proposition?” His eyes sparkled at my words but then shook his head with a hand held up. “Wait, hold up a second. You’re the club’s President? The leader of Cerca Trova?”

My nose scrunched up in response. “Well, say it any louder for everyone to hear, would you?”

His hands immediately went to his mouth and I giggled. He then repeated his question, though this time his voice slightly above a whisper. “You’re the President? You’re not messing with me, are you?”

“And why would I do that?” I said. “I’m taking a risk here, buddy, and you think I’m joking around?” I then held the manila-coloured envelope in-between my index and middle finger, making sure that the wax seal with the club’s coat of arms was visible to him. And by how much his eyes widened at the sight, he knew that I wasn’t playing around.

“Judging by your reaction, I’d say you’ve done your research and recognize our coat.”

He gulped and kept his eyes on the envelope as he asked, “What’s your proposition?”

“I’ll help with your article for the paper,” I answered. “Get you on the inside. But there are some conditions you need to agree to.”

“What conditions?”

“Well,” I tilted my head to the side, “the first condition is you have to agree before you know the conditions.” I then raised my chin at him, curious about his decision. “So, what do you say, Jaehyun?” I slightly shook the envelope. “Are you in or out?”

The male bit his bottom lip in contemplation before giving me a firm nod of his head.

“I’m in.”

I handed him the envelope, satisfied with how the events had turned out.

“I’ll see you soon, then.”

Jaehyun fiddled with the envelope he had received almost a week ago, hidden deep inside his hoodie’s pocket. He didn’t dare to part with it, scared that someone might see it and ask questions he was not ready to answer. 

Ever since then, he kept bumping into the girl. Granted, he did share two classes with her. But although they had been attending the same university for the past three years, he didn’t understand how it was only recently that he met her. Or seen her so often.

So often to the point that his friends were pointing it out.

“So,” Jungwoo drawled from his side as they just finished purchasing a hot drink from the coffee cart. “I heard from Doyoung that you’re getting close to a certain girl from our Visual Anthropology class, huh?”

“Ooh, what’s this about?” Ten said with a wriggle of his eyebrows.

“It’s nobody,” Jaehyun mumbled, almost shyly. “It’s nothing.”

“She isn’t just nobody.” Doyoung snorted. “The girl has a whole Wikipedia page.”

“Well, Johnny and his friends all have Wikipedia pages, so what’s your point?” Jaehyun shot back.

“I’m just saying,” Jungwoo continued, “you’ve been spending an awful lot of time with a girl you claim there’s nothing going on.”

“Oh, oh, oh, and speak of the devil, isn’t that her over there?” Ten announced excitedly.

“Don’t say it so loudly, she can hear us!”

Almost as if on cue, the girl turned around with a small furrow of her brows but it her look of confusion instantly disappeared when her eyes landed on him. “Jaehyun-ah!” She waved at him with a smile.

“Hey!” he greeted back warmly.

The girl bade her friends good-bye, some Jaehyun recognized as part of Johnny’s circle, and made her way over. Jaehyun ignored his friends’ jeers and tried not to crumple the piece of paper hidden in his hoodie as she walked over.

“Hey, so I was wondering if you’re free this Friday?”

“T-this Friday?” Jaehyun stuttered out. He almost wanted to slap himself for being so nervous even though he couldn’t comprehend why. “Yeah, I am.”

“Me and Johnny and some of our other friends are planning to hang out,” she continued. “You mentioned last time that you had something going on and that I should invite you the next time we have a gathering.”

It took a few seconds for it to click in his head, but Jaehyun tried not to make it too obvious that he hadn’t a single clue of what she was talking about. Three awkward seconds had passed until Jaehyun finally let out an exaggerated, “Oh, yes! I did say that.”

The girl, thankfully, didn’t try to slap the back of his head even though she looked like that was the only thing she wanted to do at that moment. “Right, um, I’ll text you the details,” she said with an awkward chuckle and waved at him and his friends before leaving them abruptly.

“There’s nothing between you two, my ass,” Ten muttered and gave him a small punch on his arm. “What was that about?”

“Wait, I didn’t tell you guys?” Doyoung exclaimed out of nowhere. “She came by the newsroom last time to look for Jaehyun.”

Jaehyun rolled his eyes. “She came by to see me for a class assignment.”

“And she couldn’t text you, instead?” Jungwoo snickered with a knowing, teasing look. “Face it, she probably got a thing for you.”

“She doesn’t!” Jaehyun retorted and walked away quickly. “Now let’s go before we’re late for class.”

But now that he thought about it, Jaehyun had never given her his phone number. So, how was she going to contact him?

“Are you sure that he agreed?” Johnny complained from the driver’s seat while I leaned back from mine in the shotgun. “We’re going to be late if he’s not arriving anytime soon.”

I bobbed my shoulders. “Text him if you’re that worried.”

“No.”

I rolled my eyes at how impatient my best friend was being. Albeit part of his shitty attitude lied in my fault. A knock was then heard from outside the window. I looked back to the two other members that sat in the back.

“Who is it?” Hendery asked out loud, not even bothering to lower the window.

“Who else, you moron,” Seulgi muttered under her breath, her sunglasses perched on her nose.

“Seulgi, be nice,” I tutted at her, though I couldn’t help but let out a small snicker. I always enjoyed seeing a cranky Seulgi—except when I was the one at the end of her wicked tongue—paired up with a good old hangover.

She groaned out loud and rubbed her forehead. “It’s too early!”

“Seulgi, it’s four in the afternoon,” I deadpanned. “Now, can someone please just let him in before the knocking makes Seulgi crabbier.”

“Is that even possible?” Hendery replied.

“Do you really want to find that out right now?” Johnny flipped his whole body around incredulously. “Should I remind you that we have a long car trip ahead of us?”

Hendery didn’t need to hear more and immediately opened the door, startling Jaehyun who looked like a deer caught in headlights with his fist up in the air.

“Oh, um, hello?” Jaehyun stuttered out with an awkward wave of his hand.

“Come on in!” Johnny waved him inside.

Hendery got out of the car before pushing the taller male back in, settling the latter between him and Seulgi. I assumed it was because he didn’t want Seulgi to throw a punch at him in case he annoyed her, which was frequent.

“Alright, one of you two blindfold him, please,” I instructed the two members in the back, “or else we cannot get a move on.”

“Seulgi, you do it,” Hendery asked as he threw the satin blindfold at the girl, who scoffed in disbelief.

“Why can’t you do it?” she refuted as she removed her dark sunglasses and glared over at Hendery.

“Because I’m a dude, duh!”

She spluttered, slightly taken aback with his retort. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“It’s weird blindfolding a guy, okay?”

“Oh, boohoo. Suck it up, you–”

Jaehyun ripped the blindfold from Seulgi’s hands and tied it around his eyes himself, causing the two bickering children to shut their mouth in disbelief. He then sighed in satisfaction before attempting to tie his seatbelt blindfolded, and managed to do so in five long excruciating silent seconds.

“Alright, I’m ready to go!” Jaehyun said with a fiddly woot. “I don’t know why I need to be blindfolded but if it’s going to bring peace, then I’ll do it! You guys could have just asked me to do it from the beginning, you know?”

“You heard that, you bimbo?” Seulgi clucked at Hendery before throwing him a small punch causing the latter yelped in pain.

Johnny shook his head and started off the car before driving out from the campus.

“So, where are we going?” Jaehyun asked as he felt the car moving.

“The destination is a secret, I’m afraid,” I replied. “Why else did we blindfold you, otherwise?”

“So, how come you guys are not wearing your lion masks, this time around?”

“Wow, you’re diving right in, aren’t you?” Johnny commented.

“Ignore John,” Seulgi advised him, “he’s still a bit bitter about how you managed to find that picture of his grandfather.”

“By the way, that’s Seulgi,” I told him. “The guy on your left is Hendery.”

“O-oh, nice to meet you both.”

“Likewise,” my two friends in the back echoed.

A couple of hours later, we finally arrived to our destination. Hendery ran out of the car, followed by Johnny who was in search of a bathroom. Seulgi’s mood seemed to have improved thanks to a little nap and waited for Jaehyun to come out of the car before locking it. But other than that, she kept her distance.

“We’re in the middle of nowhere,” Jaehyun stated in awe as he turned in circles, admiring the scenery around us, his blindfold off.

“We’re in the middle of a forest,” I corrected. I motioned him to follow me as I walked towards the table where there were little portable, vintage hand lanterns for us to use. “By the way, this thing is overnight.”

“O-overnight?”

I stopped in my tracks and looked back at him with a raised brow. “Is that going to be a problem?”

He hesitated as he thought about his words awfully carefully. “Well, I mean, it wasn’t mentioned in the invitation. So, I assumed–”

“So, it is a problem.”

“No!” he shouted back. “I mean–”

“Well, I guess I don’t mind driving you back, right now.”

He doubled at my words. “Wait, right now? What do you mean, right now?”

I snorted. “Well, you can’t exactly expect any of us to drive you back after we get ourselves hammered, now can you?” I cocked my head to the side. “You do remember in what state I was the first time we supposedly met each other?”

“Kind of hard to forget, if you ask me.”

I rolled my eyes but not at all offended and smiled back at him reassuringly. “Look, what we’re going to do tonight is completely safe and legal, so don’t worry too much about it, alright? And I made the members promise not to bite.”

For the first time of the evening, Jaehyun finally cracked a smile.

“There we go,” I said and hooped my arm around his before pulling towards where Johnny and the others had run off.

“So, what can I expect from this?” Jaehyun asked, his eyes sparkling with excitement.

“I didn’t know you had expectations.”

“Well, I have been trying to get a lead about this feature for about a year, now. So, can you really blame me?”

“Tell me, then! What exactly have you been expecting?”

We finally arrived at the place where the others were and Jaehyun immediately halted in his steps, almost as if he was faltering from the sight.

“Not… this…?” he mumbled in a daze.

We had planned this event since even before summer vacation had started. Since it was the first official event of Cerca Trova’s social calendar, it was imperative that we went all out while following our club’s past tradition of hosting a camping trip. Though, due to our generation’s more expensive taste, we decided to glamourize it a little bit.

Instead of typical camping tents, we had rented out white Swiss cottage fabric tents for everyone to use and sleep for the weekend getaway. Wooden tables with Victorian tablecloths and candlesticks decorated the whole area which was in the middle of the woods. And I could tell that Jaehyun seemed apprehensive about the candles.

And my hunch was proven right when Jaehyun asked, worry evident in his face, “Aren’t those a fire hazard?”

“It isn’t our first rodeo, Jung,” I replied and pulled him towards a tent in the far end, slightly away from the crowd. “This is yours.”

He looked surprise. “Mine?”

“Yes, your very own place to sleep. I did say that this was an overnight thing,” I said. “Figured you might want to be away from the crowd a little so you can focus on your writing.”

Jaehyun lowered his head as he entered his tent. He nodded in approval with a small hum before flopping onto the bed that was provided to him.

“Well, take some time to freshen yourself up,” I told him. “We might be in the middle of a forest, but we’re still on private grounds. If you need to make a call, there is reception.”

Jaehyun seemed relieved by my statement. “Thanks.”

I gave him a wink. “We might be a secret society, but it’s not like we’re inhumane.”

But he shook his head and smiled up at me. “No, I mean it. Thanks… for everything.”

The bright smile took me by surprise. I tried not to show it on my face or in my actions and nodded in acknowledgement. I then cleared my throat as I gave him the lantern and I motioned back with my thumb. “I still have a few things to take care of, but, festivities start in half an hour. You can do whatever you want in the meantime.”

He nodded and saluted me before falling on his back on the bed. “See you later!”

Jaehyun wasn’t certain of what he initially expected. Although he had a feeling that Cerca Trova was not a club quite like the others, he didn’t expect the scale to be this different. A part of him did expect some kegs and loud EDM music blasting through speakers and sleeping bags. But he would have never thought that their festivities would be so elaborate and themed.

“In short, that’s why I can’t make it to our date this evening,” Jaehyun said to his phone as he left a voicemail. “But, I can’t wait to come back and write and tell you everything about it. Anyway, I’ll talk to you soon. Bye.”

He was taken aback when he saw people sauntering in safari-themed clothing with wine in their hands as he left his tent. But he quickly got over his surprise and began walking around with his notepad and pen, ready to write down everything he was going to witness this evening.

He began roaming around, trying to see if he recognized a few familiar faces other than the ones he had been introduced to earlier. Jaehyun quickly gave up on that and decided to interview other members.

“Hey, guys,” he said as he walked up to a small group of four males having a conversation with either a drink in their hands, or a pipe. “Mind if I ask a few questions?”

“My, my, do stop,” one of them said in response with a look of disbelief.

“Excuse me?” Jaehyun reiterated.

“Catch on quick, why would you?” another continued. “That would prompt our congratulations and our will to sustain a discussion with you.”

Jaehyun frowned at their unusual choice of words and phrasing. “Are you guys playing a game?”

“At which you totally fail.”

He took a deep breath. “Okay, and how exactly do you play this game?”

“Try to call to mind how our group chat from its start,” another joined, “and possibly you might catch on.”

Jaehyun took the stranger’s advice into consideration and recalled the way they have been speaking ever since he entered their little circle. His mouth made an ‘o’ shape upon the realization and immediately jotted down the event. Although he wasn’t sure whether that would be relevant for the final article, but it wouldn’t hurt to keep note.

“So, you guys are not using the letter ‘e’?” he asked, just to confirm.

“And this journalist fails to follow our instructions.”

Jaehyun thought it was too much of a hassle to go along with their little game. As much of a wordsmith he was, to talk with words that did not contain the letter ‘e’ would simply deplete him of the energy he needed to last through the night.

“Right...” he declared. “I’m just going to go and speak to the others. You boys have fun.”

But somehow, after those four, no other person was willing to agree to Jaehyun’s interview. He wandered around the area like a lost puppy, but was delighted to find Johnny at the buffet table with an empty glass of wine.

“Johnny!” he exclaimed as he approached him.

“Hey!” his friend replied with a lazy smile.

Jaehyun was happy to see that Johnny wasn’t mad or grumpy with him anymore, and that he was back to his normal self. Though, he wasn’t sure if that was due to the alcohol that was swimming in the taller male’s system. But Jaehyun wasn’t going to complain.

“Sparkling, red or white?” Johnny offered.

“Um, maybe later,” Jaehyun responded and lifted his little notebook.

“Oh, right!”

“So, like, is there a reason why people are not speaking to me?” Jaehyun inquired.

“I’m speaking to you, right now, aren’t I?”

“No!” Jaehyun retorted stubbornly. “I meant like, the others.”

“Well, Jaehyun, you can’t possibly think that everyone was okay with you being here,” Johnny admitted as he took a flute of champagne and took a small sip. “Our President has to make a compromise, somehow.”

“Right, the club’s President!” Jaehyun gasped. “So, she’s the head of the group, right? Are there any other people who have a certain power?”

Johnny remained silent, unwilling to budge.

“Oh, come on, man,” Jaehyun whined. “I’m already here.”

His friend gave him a hard look and sighed in compliance. “Fine,” Johnny mumbled and signaled him to follow him with a wag of his finger.

Jaehyun was then brought in a little circle of five people that included Johnny.

“Jaehyun, meet the rest of the club execs,” Johnny said with a small pat on his shoulder and pointed at the two members he had already met with the hand that held his champagne flute. “Jae, you’ve already met Hendery and Seulgi—they’re the Treasurer and the Events Chair respectively.”

Johnny pointed to a male with a small scar on his brow but that didn’t prevent him from looking like he just jumped out of The Kanon, especially with his face’s perfect proportions and looks. “This is Taeyong, our leader’s right hand and second-in-command. So, our Vice-President.”

Taeyong, who looked the fiercest amongst them, ended up being the complete opposite, surprising Jaehyun in the most delighted way. He stuck out his hand for Jaehyun to shake and smiled at him politely. “I hope you’re enjoying your evening so far. We tried our best to make your stay as comfortable as possible.”

“Y-yes,” Jaehyun stuttered out, slightly intimidated by the other male’s charisma. “Thank you.”

“And here, you have Sicheng who is our Communications Chair,” Johnny motioned the last remaining member and Jaehyun nodded at him, just a tad unnerved from the way he stared at him. “So, there you go. You met all the people you needed to meet.”

Without waiting for his comment, they started speaking amongst themselves. This time, with the use of ‘e’s, thankfully. But, he wasn’t completely satisfied with the information he had just received. It then led him to blurt out their club President’s name, rendering the executive members completely silent.

“S-she’s–, um, she’s the President, right?” Jaehyun faltered but still gave himself a mental pat on the back for not retreating from the executives’ murderous glares. “So, how does it work, internally? Do you guys hold elections within the club? Or is it by seniority?”

They remained silent. Jaehyun wondered whether he had unintentionally stepped onto a landmine. He chuckled breathlessly and pointed a finger in a random direction. “Um, I’m going to go and find somewhere to write all of this down.”

He quickly walked away, unable to sustain the heavy tension that followed right after he said the girl’s name. And he wondered; was the shift in the atmosphere due to his mention of that name, or was it due to his presence being here?

“There you are!”

And speak of the devil.

“I was wondering where you ran off,” she said with a small giggle as she took a seat on the log next to him. “Almost thought a bear dragged you away.”

His eyes widened the slightest at the mention of the animal.

“Joking. I told you that we’re completely safe here, didn’t I?” she snickered.

The girl was wearing a simple summer dress with a straw hat. He pointed it out with a small crinkle of his eyes. “Cute hat.”

“Why, thank you,” she said as her hands went up to it before asking, “So, what are you doing here?”

Jaehyun exhaled. “Just needed a space to collect my thoughts.” He then bobbed one of his shoulders. “Not that everyone has given me enough information to do so.”

“Yeah,” she faked a wince, “sorry about that. I had to twist their arms in order to get them to even agree into letting you come in the first place.”

Jaehyun waved it aside before turning himself to face the girl with his notepad. “Okay, but you can cooperate, right?”

The girl rolled her eyes and motioned him to go ahead with her chin. “Give me your best shot.” But then held up a hand as he was about to open his mouth. “But first, the conditions of you being here.”

“Oh, right,” Jaehyun responded disappointedly. He was hoping that she had forgot.

“First, no pictures,” she said as she grabbed the camera that Jaehyun had hidden in his jacket’s pocket.

“Awn, come on!”

“Don’t worry, you’ll get it back at the end of the getaway,” she said with a small coo. “Second, no names.”

“It’s not like I was being introduced to everyone,” he mumbled under his breath.

“Well, you know the club’s execs and that’s already too many people,” she said. “Third, no physical descriptions of any of us. There are some authority figures up and down the city of Seoul trying to nab us for things that we have may or may have not done in the past.”

“Fine, I’ll keep you guys anonymous,” Jaehyun conceded. If she was the only person who could provide him some information, not to mention she was the one who did bring him here, he figured that this was the least he could do.

“Fourth, no identification of our location.”

“I don’t even know where we are!”

She snickered and proceeded while ignoring his comment. “Fifth–”

“There’s more?”

“–the most important condition of all,” she emphasized. “You cannot interfere with the integrity of the event.”

“What event?” At this point, Jaehyun was even more eager to know everything. Here he thought that the camping trip was the event, but it turned out that there was more to this? He should have done his research better, he told himself. “And how can I interfere with the integrity of the event?”

She gave him a mysterious smile. “You’ll see.” She clapped her hands together. “So, you in or you out?”

He mumbled, “I’m in.”

“Perfect,” she mused. “Now, your questions—ask away.”

Jaehyun didn’t hesitate as the questions vomit came out of his mouth without giving the poor girl a break. “How do you pay for this? Are there dues, or do you chip in? Are there alumni sponsoring it? How do you guys organize these events? And, what is happening tomorrow? Is it just as big? Or bigger? You mentioned that people might be after you guys, do they know that you’re here? Park rangers? Landowners? Are we even still in Seoul?”

He stopped himself, realizing that his questions might have slightly overwhelmed the girl. He had the tendency to do what whenever he interviewed people for his articles.

“Sorry.”

The girl laughed. “It’s nothing to apologize for. You’re excited and you want to know more—I get that.”

She then hummed as she tried to recall his questions.

“Since it’s a secret society, we are technically not registered as one with the student council, so you’d understand why you need to keep us anonymous. There aren’t dues since membership is passed down—if you’re a legacy, you’re automatically in. If there aren’t enough funds, then the executives chip in. In exchange for the power we have over the club, we make up for it in the finance department.”

“Since membership is passed down through legacies, it’s practically the same as alumni sponsoring the event. And for what’s happening tomorrow, it’s a surprise. But I can assure you it’s very Cerca Trova-esque. We do this almost every year to start off our social calendar.”

She paused and turned to him with a raised brow. “What were the rest of the questions, again?”

“Uh,” Jaehyun stuttered as he snapped himself out of his trance.

Although she was simply answering his questions, he couldn’t help but be mesmerized by the girl and how she handled everything with such poise and charisma. No wonder she was the leader of this club.

“Whose land are we on…?”

“Ah, right,” she said as she snapped her fingers. “Every year, the event remains the same but the location changes. This year, we’re on Hendery’s family’s land—the Wongs, to answer your question—and yes, they do know that we’re here. But they just don’t know what we’re here for.” She then shrugged nonchalantly. “Not that our family ever cared for what we do in our lives.”

She slowly trailed off, her eyes distant. It was only in that specific moment that Jaehyun had a feeling he had a glimpse of who she really was as a person, and not this image she had been projecting to him since the beginning.

The girl abruptly turned her head and smiled. “So? What are your other questions?”

He quickly blinked his eyes and averted them to his notepad. “R-right, um, well, about the membership, you just said that you have to be a legacy to get in. How do you know if they’re not lying or something?”

She took a sip of her drink before answering, “Mhm, well, we do keep records of the club’s past and current members. The past generation is responsible for passing on the legacy. Our secret meetings, our secret club’s room—all of that is information that was supposed to be given by the previous generation, so that means our parents or our grandparents.”

Jaehyun quickly scribbled all of that down. “So, is it possible for someone to be a legacy but isn’t part of the club?”

“Yes, but they’re rare,” she responded. “Either because it’s not their thing, or their parents or grandparents have never told them anything about it.” She shrugged. “It’s not our responsibility to go after them, either.”

“What if they change their mind? Or if they were told of it at a later time?”

She gave him a devilish smile. “Well, who am I to deny them access? Though, I’d doubt that they would refuse to join if they were told about it.”

Jaehyun frowned, confused by her statement. “What do you mean?”

She narrowed her eyes playfully at him and made him hold up three fingers. “Swear that you won’t write about this?”

“Well, it depends–”

“Jaehyun,” she cut him off with a soft, pleading look. “Swear it, please.”

He nodded. “I swear.”

She finally let go of his hand and sighed as she took off her hat and played with it. “Cerca Trova isn’t as cool or mystical as everybody thinks it is. Yeah, sure, we do some crazy stuff all the time, but it’s really just a cry for attention.” She then asked, “Do you know what our club name means?”

“Yeah, Italian for seek and you shall find.”

“And what exactly do you think we’re seeking for? Rush of adrenaline? Trouble? Our parents’ love and approval?” She made a face. “Well, that took a dark turn.” She breathed out sharply. “You said you followed me back to the limousine on the night we bumped into each other. Do you recall the phrase I shouted out before entering the car?”

“Memento vivere,” he replied. “Latin for Remember to live.”

A side of her lips curled up. “Someone did their research.” But her expression quickly turned serious. “Cerca Trova is really just a bunch of misfits trying to find meaning in their life before our time is up. A club where we can let loose and do whatever we want before we’re shackled down by the destiny paved by our families.”

“But, you guys are all heirs and heiresses to major corporations,” Jaehyun stated matter-of-factly. “Why do you guys need somewhere else to do whatever you want when you have almost everything in the palm of your hands?”

She peered into his eyes. “Tell me, Jaehyun, what do you want to do after graduation? After turning into a full-fledged adult?”

The question took him by surprise. “Well, I want to become a journalist. Write meaningful articles. Travel the world.”

“And are you happy, right now?”

Jaehyun was slightly taken aback with her question that he was rendered speechless. But he found himself unable to answer it.

She laughed, but Jaehyun wasn’t able to detect a hint of humour in her laugh. “Did you know that no one has ever asked me those two questions? Not even Johnny or Taeyong or Seulgi or anyone in this club? Why do you think that?”

Jaehyun remained silent.

“Because, our life is already set in stone by our family elders. The schools we’ve been sent to, the classes we have to take, the people we become friends with—there is nothing about our life that is authentic.”

Someone shouted her name and she got up from the log before wearing her straw hat again.

“Cerca Trova is pretty much our safe haven. It’s a place that allows us—that dares us—to dream.”

“But your parents and your grandparents,” Jaehyun said. “Weren’t they also members?”

She hummed. “Yes, but they ran out of time—just like we will.”

Someone called for her once again. This time, Jaehyun recognized the voice as Johnny’s.

“Coming!” she shouted back and turned back to him with an expression he couldn’t decipher. “Sleep tight, Jaehyun. You’ll need it for tomorrow’s big event.”

Jaehyun told himself he should really stop being so awed by the things he had seen. And although the girl had warned him that there was going to be a big event happening the next day, he didn’t expect an event of this scale.

It first started the morning of, when Jaehyun woke up to an empty and silent camp site. He panicked just the slightest until he noticed the girl waiting for him on a bench near his tent. She was about to greet him when her expression turned sour as she looked him up-and-down.

“What’s with the ball gown?” he asked.

“I should ask you the same question,” she replied with a look. “You can’t attend the event wearing your civilian clothes.”

“But, I didn’t know that I was supposed to bring a tux!” Jaehyun argued. “Heck, I didn’t even know that it was an overnight thing!”

“You promised that you will not interfere with the integrity of our event!” she countered back and then pointed at his outfit that consisted of a simple black tee-shirt and a pair of black jeans. “Your clothing will interfere with the integrity of the event.”

“I literally do not have any other clothes on me at the moment.”

“Did you even check out your tent properly?” she asked exasperatedly.

Jaehyun raised a questioning brow before heading back inside his tent. This time, he made sure to look around properly. The only spot he hadn’t looked before was under his bed. And just like that, he managed to find a huge white box with a red bow on it. And the box revealed a whole ensemble, completed with a pair of leather shoes and bowtie.

A few minutes later, he finally came out of his tent, wearing the outfit that had been specially prepared for him.

The girl grinned, satisfied with the results. “Well, don’t you look dashing.”

“Thanks,” he mumbled, a bit shy since he wasn’t used to both compliments and wearing a tuxedo. “You too.”

His eyes then widened when he realized what he had just said and his eyes immediately reddened. “No! That’s not what I mean! I mean, yes! No! I mean–” He took a deep breath. “You look beautiful.”

She giggled and gave him a small curtsy. “Why, thank you.” She then pulled his arm as they ran towards a path that led them to an open field. “Now, come on! We’re going to be late!”

At their arrival, Jaehyun could already tell that they were the last ones to arrive. The girl kept rushing him while he was trying to take in all the details. She pulled him to the front of the group gathering—Jaehyun estimated the club compromised of approximately 40 members including the executives—before handing him a flute of champagne.

Jaehyun took the flute distractedly as he listened to Taeyong, who was speaking in the front.

“–and I do declare here gathered, the 108th grand assembly of the honourable Cerca Trova society,” the Vice-President announced. “Please raise your glasses.”

Jaehyun did as asked and looked around in panic, wondering whether he was doing this correctly or not.

“Memento vivere!”

The rest of the group repeated the same words whereas Jaehyun mumbled the words belatedly. The girl raised the glass of champagne to his lips and quietly motioned him to do the same to her. After taking a sip, she took a step back and then said to him, “Cover your ears.”

“H-huh, why?”

The loud sound of a trumpet was blown, similar to a fanfare, causing everyone to shout in delight before running towards the middle of the field.

“That’s why,” she said with a small wink before joining the others who seemed to have begun a small game of croquet. Only with a small twist. The girls were to sit in a palanquin and hit the wooden balls with the mallet through the wicket whereas the boys were the ones carrying the litters.

Jaehyun decided to check out the large venue. Buffet tables with fruits and finger foods and alcohol set under large white tents lined the sides of the field. Gramophones played out playful medieval music. Another activity on the sidelines caught Jaehyun’s attention, where the rest of the executive members were.

“Oh, hi, Jaehyun,” Seulgi greeted him.

“Hi,” he replied and raised a brow. “So, what’s going on?”

He then heard Taeyong shout, “Pull!”

At his word, Johnny jumped from a trampoline and Taeyong used a paint gun to shoot at his friend. The latter then landed on a huge air mattress. “Ooh, nice shot, TY,” Johnny exclaimed from the mattress with a fist up in the air.

“Is this safe?” Jaehyun asked, to which all of them simultaneously replied with a single nonchalant, “No.”

“Pull! Pull! Pull!” Hendery shouted in glee without a break. He grumbled something to himself and handed the gun over to Jaehyun. “All right, I’m bored. I want to be a target.”

“You’re always a target, Hendery,” Seulgi mumbled as Hendery headed over to the trampoline, and then turned to Jaehyun, startling the latter. “Do me a favour? Hit him in the face.”

Jaehyun nodded slowly, wondering if she was being serious or not, and took position as he waited for Hendery to set himself in place. He brought up the paint gun to his line of vision and asked the remaining members, “So, is this the big stunt?

“The big stunt?” Sicheng repeated and crossed his arms in amusement. “Does it look like it?”

“I’m guessing no,” Jaehyun mumbled under his breath.

“You have to say pull, sweetie,” Seulgi advised him. “We don’t have all day.”

“O-oh, uh, pull!” Jaehyun shouted and Hendery jumped off on his mark. He quickly pulled the trigger and out of nervousness, he didn’t even know whether the paint had hit Hendery or not. Jaehyun secretly hoped that it didn’t. He didn’t want to be the reason why Hendery had to be sent to a hospital.

“Well, you just answered your own question,” Sicheng replied.

“Don’t worry, Jaehyun,” Johnny said and patted him on the shoulder. “You’ll know it when you see it.”

Jaehyun’s eyes practically bulged out when he saw Hendery being carried away in a stretcher by other members of the club. “W-wait, what happened?”

“I missed the mat,” Hendery groaned.

“Again?” Seulgi snickered. “Why am I not surprised?”

“Oh, guys, come on, it’s time for the big finale,” Taeyong announced and threw the paint gun onto the mat. Jaehyun quickly mirrored his action. “Let’s head out to the venue.”

“Th-there’s a venue?”

Jaehyun quickly followed the group and saw a tall contraption that must be at least around 30 meters high with a platform with people already standing on it.

“Guess who’s the genius behind all this?” Johnny mused as he pointed at Cerca Trova’s President with his chin as the latter approached them with a skip in her steps.

“Are you guys ready?” she practically squealed.

“Ready?” Jaehyun chuckled nervously. “Ready for what?”

“Well, what do you think we’re going to do?” Taeyong asked.

“You guys are not going to jump, are you?” Jaehyun replied with another question, appalled.

“Going to jump, yes!” Johnny exclaimed with his fists pumped up.

Jaehyun pointed at the tall structure. “That’s almost 7 stories tall! They’re going to die!”

The girl gasped dramatically. “Oi, that’s my masterpiece you’re talking about here. No one will die. No one in the history of Cerca Trova has ever died.”

“That’s also because past members used to jump from a low bridge into a small pond,” Seulgi whispered to him with a small giggle.

Taeyong, Johnny, Seulgi, and Sicheng quickly left and started heading up to the platform.

“And besides, we’re all going to die, one day,” the girl then said as she observed her four friends going up.

“B-but, those four are today.”

She smiled at him mischievously. “Six.”

Jaehyun counted the heads again: Taeyong, Johnny, Seulgi, and Sicheng.

Four.

“But, I see four.”

“I’m heading up,” the girl stated.

“Of course, you are.” Jaehyun never wanted to smack himself in the face so badly.

She rolled her eyes. “Anyway, Hendery was supposed to do it. It’s tradition for the six executives to jump to symbolize the start of a new school year. But Hendery, being Hendery, can’t make it anymore so there’s an extra space.”

Jaehyun hummed as he stared up at the four other members who had umbrellas in their hands. They were basically replicating the picture he had seen of Johnny’s grandfather during his time in the club.

When he didn’t hear the girl say anything else, he slowly came to the conclusion. “Oh, no, no, no, no.”

“Hey, have a little bit of faith in me, would you?” She pouted. “It’s very safe. Me and my team did dozen successful test drops and every potato came through without a single scratch.”

“A potato?” Jaehyun deadpanned, clearly unimpressed.

“Well, you can’t test using people,” she replied, baffled, “that’d be dangerous.”

“Jumpers to their place!” Hendery shouted from a wheelchair, disappointment evident in his demeanour.

“Come on!” The girl pulled him along. “It’ll be a nice thing to write about for your article. All great journalists are active participants, not just observers.”

And Jaehyun allowed himself to be pulled away. If anything, that was the only way to get him up there. “We’ve only met like, how many times already? How do you know me so well that you’d use my journalistic ambitions against me?”

“Well, I’ve been observing you—looking at you.” She then turned around with an alarmed look. “It sounded better in my head, trust me. But, I’m not a creep or anything.”

“No, just a daredevil,” he mumbled as he continued to stare at her contraption. “But why have you been looking at me? To use your words?”

She scoffed as they started climbing up the ladder that would eventually lead them to the top. “You mean,” she grunted, “you seriously don’t know why? I thought I made it obvious?”

“Obvious?” Jaehyun repeated. “Made what obvious?”

At the top, she handed him a black umbrella and helped him fasten a belt with a rope tied to it. “Don’t worry, it’s basically the same concept as bungee jumping. Only it’s going to help slow down your speed as you descend along with the umbrella.”

Jaehyun peered over and shuddered. “Uh, why do they look so worried?”

“We’re low on alcohol, probably,” she stated offhandedly as she fastened her own belt and opened up her umbrella. “Regarding your question—why do you think I fought so hard against my friends to let you participate in Cerca Trova’s most important event of its social calendar?”

“Uh, I don’t know? Because you took pity on a poor university journalist on a tight deadline?”

She snorted. “That, but also because I like you.”

“Wait, what?”

She grabbed his hand and smiled before jumping off the platform without a single warning. Jaehyun’s heart practically jumped out from his chest as adrenaline rushed through his veins during the descent. The members waiting at the bottom of the metal structure cheered as they safely landed on the ground.

Jaehyun chuckled breathlessly as he made sure that he was still alive. And he felt alive more than ever. He automatically turned to the girl who held his hand during the whole experience and faltered when he saw that she was already looking at him with a small, almost shy, smile.

“I like you.”

The following weeks passed by like a blur for Jaehyun. In-between writing his article, driving back-and-forth from university to his home to visit his girlfriend, and keeping up with his classes and assignments, he barely had the time to think about the confession he had received from a certain girl. Not to mention, he hadn’t properly thanked her for helping him with the article now that it was finally published.

“Hey, Mum,” he said to his phone as he walking to his Visual Anthropology class. “What’s up? I’m heading to class now, so please make it quick.”

“Hi, honey,” she replied back. “Did you give a reply back to your grandfather about that summer internship he had found for you?”

He sighed, not wanting to go through this conversation again. “Mum, I already told you that I was going to travel with Naeun this summer.”

“I know, I know,” she said. “But it’s a huge opportunity and I feel like you haven’t given it much thought because you already have these plans. Your grandfather just called me earlier and he sounded so excited and proud about the prospect of you working at that internship.” His mother then sighed. “Just promise me you’ll think about it, okay?”

“Fine, I promise.”

“Oh, and, your grandparents want to host a party to mark your debut into society, the Saturday in two weeks,” she continued. “So, instead of our weekly dinners, it will be a soirée. Make sure to come earlier than usual. I think your grandmother ordered some custom suits just for you.”

Jaehyun tried not to sound irritated. “Mum, isn’t this a bit too much? I mean, just a couple of months ago, you guys were barely speaking to each other, and now, you’re organizing events together and–”

“Honey, I know the argument that I had with your grandparents a while back affected our relationship with them,” she spoke softly. “But, they had done so much for us. Helping us out when your father left, paying for your university’s tuition, and so much more. And I know how much Grandpa means to you and how proud you always wanted to make him. And I figured that I cannot take that away from you. The bad blood between me and your grandparents shouldn’t affect your relationship with them, at all.”

His mother didn’t lie. His grandparents were at first against the marriage between his mother and father, not to mention he was born out of wedlock. They were so against it that they had a falling out and hadn’t spoken to each other for the first ten years of his life. They had a bad feeling about his father and they were proven right when Jaehyun’s father left him when he was ten years old. Ever since then, his grandparents had helped him and his mother out, and Jaehyun grew to look up to his grandfather.

Jaehyun wasn’t certain why his mother and his grandparents had another falling out a few years ago, when he turned eighteen, but that did make his relationship with the elders a tad more complicated and awkward than it used to be. It was only recently, a couple of months ago, that they had finally made up. And Jaehyun was more than happy to be on speaking terms with his grandparents again.

“I know,” he said.

“And besides,” his mother continued, “you were supposed to have this party when you turned eighteen, but you weren’t able to. And now that your grandparents and I are speaking to each other again, they got a little bit excited and decided to use this opportunity to invite their old friends from SNU, as well. It’ll be a good opportunity for you to socialize and make connections.”

“Yeah, Mum, it’s not really my thing.” Jaehyun winced at the news. “I know I said I agreed to them having a party for that or whatever, but it sounds like they’re making this bigger than it should be.”

“Oh, honey, I know,” she said, sympathizing with him. “But do this for your grandpa, yeah? And if you want, you can bring Naeun with you.”

He was slightly taken aback at the idea of bringing his girlfriend to meet his grandparents, but quickly brushed it off as he chuckled. “Yeah, that’d be nice. She never met them before.”

“See? Silver lining. Invite your friends from the newspaper! I’m sure that your grandfather would love to meet them.” She sounded so satisfied. “Anyway, you’ve got class, right? I’ll let you go now. Love you.”

“Love you too.”

He quickly dialed his girlfriend’s number and she picked up at the first ring.

“Hey, stranger.”

“Hey,” he replied back. “So, Saturday in two weeks—got any plans?”

“Why? Are you asking me out on a date?” he heard her giggle.

“Not exactly,” he said. “My grandparents are hosting this soirée or party or whatever that Saturday, and I am forced to attend it. Would you please be an angel and keep me company? I also want to introduce you to them, as well! Especially to my grandfather.”

“The grandparents that helped your mum raise you? And meet the grandfather that you look up to? Sounds good,” Naeun agreed easily. “Pick me up at six?”

He groaned. “Actually, I can’t pick you up because my grandmother probably wants me there early for suit fitting and what-not—forgive me?”

“Well, you’ll be in a suit and all, so I think you’re already forgiven.”

“You’re the best,” he said. “Oh, and by the way, did you finally take a look at my story?”

“Uhh, what story?”

Jaehyun’s heart dropped a little when he heard the hesitation in her voice. “The one I’ve written about the secret society at SNU?”

His girlfriend stammered a little. “O-oh, yeah, I did. Your writing is as impeccable as always. You know that I like everything that you write.”

“Really?” he exclaimed. “What was your favourite part?”

“Oh, you know, like the whole thing was just really well-written,” she mumbled vaguely. “Anyway, I have to head to work now. Call me later?”

He didn’t think too much about her reply and hummed. “You know it.”

He pocketed his phone and was about to enter the auditorium, where his Visual Anthropology class was held. He immediately noticed the President of the secret society he had been after for a year, standing next to the door, a cup of coffee in one hand and a copy of The Daily SNU in the other.

He froze in his tracks, not knowing what to do in this situation.

The girl smiled brightly when she noticed him and walked up to him. “Hey,” she greeted him and raised the newspaper. “Read your article.”

“Y-you did?” He wanted to hit himself in the face. “I– I mean, hey.”

“Hello,” she said with a smile and then nodded approvingly. “And yeah, got to say, Jaehyun, you really are meant to be a journalist. You caught the spirit of the thing—I’ll give you that.”

“But?” he asked unsurely.

She laughed. “Not but’s! Your writing style is really good. You used too many metaphors for my taste, but it also reminded me a little bit of Joseph Mitchell’s writing.”

Jaehyun stammered out his next few words, still in shock that she would come up to him, especially since he didn’t properly acknowledge her confession and walked away from her awkwardly. “W-well, I got to admit, I’m surprised you even bothered to read it.”

“Excuse you? I am an avid reader of The Daily SNU, mind you,” she retorted jokingly. “And how can I not read it? Especially when it’s about the club that I’m part of. But I can assure you this, everyone in Cerca Trova is raving about it.”

“Really?”

“Yup,” she reassured him, “like I said, you really caught the essence of our society and the members really appreciated that. I also appreciate the fact that you kept some of the stuff a secret, like I have kindly asked you to.”

“W-well, thank you,” Jaehyun said with a relieved smile. Not only did the subject of his article loved it, but she also appreciated his writing. Those were the biggest compliments he could have gotten as a journalist. Not to mention the fact that she recognized one of his favourite writers’ style in his own.

“And, I also wanted to talk to you, you know, about the whole I-like-you thing.”

The girl stated it so bluntly that he could feel his ears growing hot. He only hoped that they weren’t so red that she would take notice of them.

She sighed. “I want to apologize for putting you in that spot. But I’m not saying that I regret it. On the contrary, I do like you. I find you really charming and interesting as I got to know you. But, we’ve only known each other for a short while and honestly? Not everyone can handle me and my personality. I think that’s what hit me the most. And because it’s not everyone who like me for who I am, I’m really grateful for the fact that you didn’t run away because of that, but more like because my abrupt confession took you by surprise.”

“Yes!” he exclaimed suddenly, startling the girl. “I mean, yes, thank you for not misunderstanding my actions and the reason why I walked away from you. It’s not because I don’t like you or anything. I mean, I do like you, but I don’t, in that–”

She started laughing at his stammering mess. “It’s okay, Jaehyun. You don’t need to explain yourself. I understand. I mean, all that just to say that I hope we can still be close, you know, even after your article is done and you don’t need me anymore.”

“Yes!” he exclaimed once again and cleared his throat as he regained his composure. “Uh, yes, I agree. I’m glad that you came up to me.”

She hit him on the chest lightly with the newspaper with a smile. “Glad we’re on the same page.”

“Well, how about this,” he said, “my grandparents are having this party Saturday, in two weeks. Why don’t you and Johnny and the other club members come?”

“Ooh, in two weeks, huh?”

Jaehyun nodded.

“I can’t,” she said with a small pout.

For some reason, Jaehyun thought she looked really adorable at that moment.

“The club members and I already have this event to attend. It was pretty last minute too—just heard about it today from my parents earlier on.” She blew a raspberry. “You just missed me by a few minutes—that sucks. I would have loved to keep you company, but I already promised my parents that I’d attend it this one.”

“That does suck.” He sighed disappointedly. “Well, we can’t do anything about that.”

“What about your friends at the paper? Can they not come?”

“I haven’t invited them yet,” he replied. “But I’m sure they’ll agree.”

“That’s good,” she said. “Oh, and speaking of your friends at the paper. Your friend, Doyoung? He doesn’t suspect anything, right?”

“Pretty sure he forgot about it,” he said while shaking his head. “And hey, you’re presenting today, right? How are you feeling?”

She rolled her eyes with a dramatic groan as if she was in pain. “Never liked presenting in front of people. I’m dreading it, to be honest. I was about to drop the class when I found out about it, but my guidance counsellor talked me out of it.”

“I’m sure you’ll do fine,” Jaehyun reassured her, though he understood her pain.

And she did fine.

More than fine.

“–Edward Said unravels and exposes problematic representations in all social sciences, and that actually brings many critiques in anthropology, especially because of the visual component of capturing the other, capturing the soul of the other, questions about consent and ethics, and etc.”

“Uh, dude, you’re staring,” Jungwoo mumbled to him.

Jaehyun immediately snapped out of his daze and gave his friend a look. “She’s giving a presentation. Where else am I supposed to look, then?”

“Uh, people don’t look at her like you do,” Jungwoo replied with a weird look.

He almost wanted to roll his eyes. “How exactly do I look at her, pray tell?”

“Like you adore her or something,” his friend answered without hesitation. “Like she’s the most fascinating person in the whole entire world. Like she’s a book that you are dying to read. Like–”

“Okay, I get it,” Jaehyun said to shush him up as people were starting to give them looks for being a tad too loud. “And I don’t look at her that way. What are you talking about?”

“Sure, keep telling yourself that.”

“Alright, anyone else got any questions?” the professor asked.

Jaehyun tried not to glare at his friend for distracting him from the girl’s presentation and from the other students’ questions. Although he usually dreaded listening to oral presentations, she had brought in a new angle for the topic which was more than interesting for Jaehyun. She seemed so full of knowledge that he found himself wanting to know more.

That he found himself raising his hand.

“Yes, Jaehyun, go ahead.”

He could tell that the girl raised a brow in amusement, probably wondering what kind of question he had for her. Jaehyun rarely asked questions, only because he knew just how much the students hated being put on the spot. But the girl, contrary to what she had stated prior to her presentation, was eager to answer questions—ready to challenge whomever.

“Well, I was wondering, if epistemology is the study of knowledge production about a topic and methodology is the method or the tool of exploring a topic, according to you, where is the visual in visual anthropology in this spectrum? In your opinion, is the visual understood as a tool of knowing or as a site of knowing?”

“Excellent question, Mr. Jung,” the professor remarked with delight.

The girl seemed to feel the same about his question. “Well, in my opinion, thick description relates more to the writing part of anthropology as it refers to making descriptions of cultural acts to be clear or adequately describe for people who are not present while it happens,” she easily answered, “whereas, the camera serves as a way of illustrating exactly what is happening because it is being filmed, although it might require some description of what is actually occurring. The camera allows all viewers to interpret their own ideas of what is happening and doesn’t require much of the anthropologist’s interpretation or thick description.”

“So, film and still image can perhaps be known or impart some knowledge through the interpretation of cultural cyphers?” Jaehyun added, though it came out more like a question even though it was meant to be as a statement.

“Yes, exactly. It’s all about the framework,” she replied without hesitation. “I believe that there is no real objective view of culture or ethnography because we all have inherent biases that stem from the cultures we are raised in. Even as a tool of signifier, we have our own individual interpretations of our material world.”

“And an excellent answer to an excellent question,” the professor complimented. “I hope you guys will ask questions of the same calibre as Jaehyun’s for the next presenter. This is university, people, not high school. Class dismissed.”

“What the hell were you two even talking about?” Jungwoo asked with a small groan. “You’re giving me a headache with all this talk about thick descriptions and films and whatever jargon you guys were using.”

Jaehyun chuckled at his friend as he packed up his stuff. “Jungwoo, this is material that we learned like a month ago.”

“You know I’m only taking this class as an elective because of you, right?” Jungwoo said with a deadpanned expression. “I thought you said this was an easy class!”

“It is, though?” Jaehyun remarked with confusion. Jungwoo was an Engineering student, that boy was practically a genius.

“You look glad, though,” Jungwoo commented with an expression similar to relief. “Weren’t you saying how you have yet to meet someone who can stimulate you intellectually or something?” He then threw a look over at the girl who was speaking with the professor.

“Looks like you’ve met your match.”

To make up for the fact that the gang and I couldn’t attend the party Jaehyun had invited us to, we thought that it would only be fair to invite him to another one of Cerca Trova’s outings. Surprisingly, none of the executive members were against my decision.

This time around, we had whisked him away for a long weekend outing in Jeju-do. At first, he was hesitant since he said he couldn’t afford the trip. But we all reassured him that the basic expenses were already provided for: Seulgi’s family jet was going to bring us there, Johnny was the one who provided the accommodations, and Taeyong was responsible for the land transportation.

We originally wanted to head over to Europe for a week, especially after midterms, but Jaehyun wasn’t too keen on the idea that he had to miss a whole week of school. A Friday was the most we could get out of him, but he wanted to be back by Monday morning, just in time for his afternoon classes.

“We were supposed to live at my place, but my parents are there, so,” I said to Jaehyun as we landed in Jeju International Airport. “Thankfully, Johnny was able to book us a suite for the seven of us.”

“Well, what’s the point of being the heir to a chain of hotels if I can’t do that much?” Johnny drawled as we descend from Seulgi’s jet.

“What about the other members?” Jaehyun asked. “The non-executive ones?”

I cocked a brow at him. “Is this for another one of your article?” He quickly shook his head with his eyes wide. “I’m kidding,” I said before shrugging at his question. “They’re somewhere on the island, I guess? Unless the activities that we do require us to, we usually stay within our own little group rather than gathering everyone up together.”

“It’s a weekend of relaxation,” Hendery added with a small snort. “We don’t really want to be stuck with each other for that long, you know?”

“And yet, I’m stuck with you,” Seulgi quipped with an exaggerated sigh.

“Can it, Kang,” Hendery hissed before retreating away next to Sicheng.

Jaehyun chuckled next to me as Taeyong led us to the cars he had prepared for us. “Are they always like this?”

“For as long as I can remember,” I answered. “So, have you thought about what you wanted to do in Jeju?”

He looked taken aback. “You mean, you guys haven’t planned any activities?”

I frowned. “Hey, the executives deserve a break, once in a while, you know? We can’t be planning activities left and right, and not have some time to ourselves and relax.”

“I guess I’ll tag along with you.”

His answer took me by surprise. “Um, are you sure?”

“Why wouldn’t I be sure?”

“Because not everyone share the same interests as I do,” I said and then motioned my friends who were walking in front of us. “Ask them.”

“It’s true,” Sicheng said. “Feel free to join us, if you’d like. We’re going hiking.”

I grimaced at that last word which caused Jaehyun to chuckle.

“Not a fan of physical activities?”

“Not a fan of sweating,” I replied with a fake wince. “They dragged me once to the top of Hallasan last summer, and God, did I want to throw them off from the top of the mountain.”

“But surely you must have been glad once you’ve reached the top?”

I gave him an ambiguous smile. “Who knows? They’re still here now, aren’t they?”

“Alright,” Taeyong said and turned to us as we got out of the airport. A line of black Audi R8 cars took over the parking near the sidewalk with employees from the Lee family standing next to the vehicles, a key on top of the red cushion they were holding. “How many cars do we need?”

“Well, no way am I going to be in the same car as Hendery, so I call dibs on a single car,” Seulgi said with her hand shot up in the air.

“Wow.” Hendery scoffed in disbelief. “I literally just breathed.”

“You’ll get over it, Wong.”

“Alright, let’s split the tasks, first, then,” I decided. “Johnny, Taeyong, you two head over to the hotel and get our rooms set up and make sure everything’s in place. Seulgi, Sicheng, and Hendery, you three take care of the food we need for the BBQ we’re having tonight. Jaehyun and I will take care of the cooking.”

“Sounds good to me,” Johnny said with an approving nod of his head.

“Other than that, do whatever you guys want to do. Relax, go for a drive, I don’t care. But be back at the hotel by 6:30 so that we can start setting up the stuff for the BBQ.”

Seulgi didn’t even wait for further directions before dashing off to the first car at the front and took the keys from the employee and got inside the car.

“Hendery, Sicheng, I suggest you two get a move on before you two lose Seulgi,” I said teasingly.

The two immediately ran off. Sicheng grabbed the keys while Hendery jumped in the passenger seat.

“Where are you two heading off?” Taeyong asked with crossed arms as he leaned against the car. “The museum?”

I shook my head. “Nah, somewhere else.” I then turned to Jaehyun. “You ready?”

With his confirmation, I caught the keys that Taeyong had thrown at me before entering the car. Jaehyun followed soon after. I marvelled at the interior of the car and let out a small “ooh”, causing Jaehyun to ask me what’s up.

“No need to put the key into the ignition,” I said as I motioned the small button that I got to push in order to start up the car. I immediately clicked it and I could practically feel my eyes sparkling at the marvel of the car.

Johnny knocked on Jaehyun’s side of the car and the latter immediately rolled down the window. He then motioned me with his chin and clucked his tongue at the male next to me. “Make sure to put on your seatbelt. The girl can get a bit wonky in the head once she has a sports car in her hands.”

“Funny,” I deadpanned and immediately drove off without any warning, with Jaehyun letting out a small yelp at the speed. I tried not to laugh as he tightened his hold around his belt a bit. “Relax,” I told him. “I’m really careful when I have someone with me in the car.”

“Right, um, I believe you,” Jaehyun stuttered out, his nervousness oozing out of him. But after a few minutes on the road, he seemed to have relaxed a little. I assumed the landscape outside must have helped. “So, where are we going?”

As I was about to answer, Jaehyun’s stomach growled and his ears immediately reddened. I laughed a little and took a look at the digital clock to see that it was already 1 in the afternoon. We didn’t exactly have lunch on Seulgi’s jet, either.

“Change of plans,” I said as I made an abrupt U-turn. “We’re going to eat.”

Around twenty minutes later, we arrived to the Dongmun Traditional Market. I automatically walked in and was at awe at the number of people who were in the market this early. But I guess it wasn’t as early as I thought. But, I was happy to be able to come here today. Coming in tomorrow or after-tomorrow during the weekend would have been horrible.

Jaehyun looked confused as he walked beside me. “You brought me to a market?”

“Where else did you expect me to bring you to?” I asked. “A high-end restaurant?”

“Well, I– I mean,” he stammered out, “can you blame me? With all your jets and private cars and private suites.”

I bobbed a side of my shoulders. “Yeah, I could have brought you to a high-end restaurant, but I was craving street food.” I glanced over at him and halted in my steps. “Well, it’s never too late. Do you want to go–”

“No!” he shouted and immediately lowered his voice when he noticed the attention that he attracted with his loud voice. “I mean, here is fine. We can eat street food.”

As soon as we entered the market, I made way for my favourite croquettes stand. I was pulled back abruptly and I gasped when I felt someone’s hand around my wrist. I immediately looked back with a threatening look to only soften when I realized that it was simply Jaehyun.

My eyes landed on his hand that was around my wrist and he instantly let go of it. He cleared his throat and didn’t dare to look me in the eyes as he mumbled, “You were walking too fast and I didn’t want to lose you in the crowd.”

I smiled a little at how cute and shy he was being and wrapped my hand around his without hesitation. He looked taken aback and I tried not to coo at how red his ears had gotten, though I was certain that my own cheeks were the same colour.

“There,” I then said as I walked towards the croquettes stand, “that should do it.”

“Ahjumma!” I immediately shouted out as her familiar face came into view.

“Look who’s back!” the older lady replied back gleefully and her eyes immediately fell into our intertwined hands but thankfully made no comment of it. “So, who is this?”

“This is Jaehyun,” I answered. “A friend of mine from university.”

“That’s weird, you usually never bring anyone with you,” she commented.

I chuckled awkwardly. “Well, I brought one today, haha…”

“Alright, I’m going to stop teasing you,” she said, making me breathe out a sigh of relief. “So, what can I get for you two, today?”

I perused the small menu hung at the top of the stall. “I think I’ll take 1 beef croquette and 1 shrimp croquette.” I turned to Jaehyun who was looking down at me. 

He seemed startled by my sudden movement and instantly switched his attention to the menu as he stuttered out, “Oh, um, I think I’ll take the same as you.”

I ignored his weird behaviour and passed it off that he was probably just out of it due to his hunger. “Okay, then. Ahjumma, we’ll take 2 beef and 2 shrimp! How much will that be?”

“It’ll be 10 000 won, dear.”

“Oh, I’ll pay,” Jaehyun said as his hand immediately shot up with a 10 000 won bill in his hand.

“Hey, I don’t mind,” I said and tried to ignore the feeling that was starting to wash over me as I felt how empty my hand was now that Jaehyun had let go of it. “I was the one who invited you here.”

“Yeah, but you guys basically paid for everything else, so please,” he said softly. “At least, let me pay for the food we’re going to eat at the market, today.”

I was slightly stunned with the expression he was sporting right now and was hit with the realization of just how handsome Jaehyun truly was. More so than ever. His beauty was something that I couldn’t describe properly but it reminded me of something fragile yet strong. Like how soft carved drapery looked like on a marble Kore statue.

“Uh, s-sure,” I managed to say when I realized that I was staring at his face for a tad too long.

His dimpled smile was his only reply.

While waiting for our food to be prepared, I tried to shake away the thoughts of him. My friends said that I was being too soft with a man who didn’t reciprocate my feelings and that perhaps I should let go of them – of this infatuation that I had with someone who was different. They all thought that he was just a mere distraction, but I knew.

I knew that he was more than that.

And when Jaehyun was the one who made the move to grab hold of my hand once again after our food was done and made way to the next stall I wanted to visit, I knew.

I just knew I had fallen hard for Jung Jaehyun.

The long weekend getaway passed in a flash. Jaehyun was starting to understand why the Cerca Trova members loved to get away so often. Anything that they did, it was enticing and entertaining—he truly understood the allure behind the secret society’s mystique and why people were so enamored with them.

Though, he couldn’t possibly admit to his friends back at the paper that he was spending time with the secret society members once again, especially since he was already done with the feature. And although Taeil insisted for a follow-up, he wasn’t too keen on asking the President of the club for another opportunity. And granted that he could write about the past weekend’s getaway, he didn’t want to betray their trust like that.

Especially not hers.

So, he told a little white lie to his friends and said that he was invited to Jeju island by Johnny and the gang, which wasn’t completely false. But his friends were more preoccupied by the fact that he was spending most of his time on the island with Johnny’s best friend.

Something that his friends had continuously teased him about it, especially Jungwoo.

Jaehyun found himself to be spending a lot more time with the girl than he’d like to admit. Not only was she incredibly intelligent and helpful in many ways, Jaehyun was reminded of Jungwoo’s words right after the girl’s presentation during their Visual Anthropology class.

“Looks like you’ve met your match.”

Everything that she said and did—it just reminded him of how brilliant she was.

Cunning and wicked and brilliant.

And God, was he attracted to her.

But he didn’t allow himself to cross that line with her. His heart did skip a few beat when she held his hand at the market, but he didn’t dare to make a move on her. And maybe she had sensed that he didn’t want to take that step, so she distanced herself a little.

He had a girlfriend back home, for goodness’s sake. And Jaehyun wasn’t the type to hurt his loved ones like that—never. So, he had no choice but to deny his own feelings whether he liked it or not. He tried to convince himself that it was simply infatuation, that he spent too much time away from home and his girlfriend.

But wow, was he completely enamored with her.

“Okay, but the tragedy of the commons theory comes into play because our population is growing exponentially and our resources’ growth rate isn’t going as fast as the population’s growth,” she argued as they discussed their small research assignment.

Jaehyun grouped with the girl and Doyoung, and they decided to research on how a society managed its own common pool property resources.

“Yeah, you’re right,” Doyoung agreed. “Common pool property resources are resources that are shared amongst the population and are considered as a non-excludable public good, meaning it is hard and practically impossible to restrict another citizen from them.”

“But that also means that they can be considered as rivalrous,” Jaehyun added, “because one’s individual use of the resources actually reduces the resources’ availability to other people.”

“Exactly,” she continued. “The excessive use of those resources may result in externalities that are negative such as pollution, extinction or even consequences that might harm bystanders. So, when a shared resource gets exploited–”

“It’s the tragedy of the commons,” Jaehyun mumbled, in awe.

“Bingo,” the girl said with a proud smile.

“Wow, I never looked at it that way,” Doyoung muttered as he furiously typed in the notes so that they could use them later for their paper. “It makes a complete circle.”

Jaehyun nodded, still slightly at awe by how easily she handled their research topic. “The theory leads to one conclusion—property rights are needed. But how can we prove that?”

The girl typed in something on her laptop before turning the screen towards them. On it was displayed another research paper. “We can analyze a major study. I’ve read this paper for another class and it’s a study on common pool resources in Malawi. If I remember correctly, there were many solutions that were brought to manage the resources.”

The students around them started getting up, signaling the end of class.

“I’ve got another class to go to now,” Doyoung announced as the trio started packing up. “Since it’s due next class, how are we supposed to do this?”

Both of the males looked at the girl expectantly without any hesitation. Jaehyun thought it was almost weird that they relied on the girl completely even though it was their first time working together. However, it would be stupid of both of them to ignore the leadership skills and intellect she had displayed to them today. Jaehyun thought that she was worthy of being called a leader—no wonder she was elected as her club’s President. And no wonder why her friends seemed so loyal to her.

She turned to Jaehyun. “Do you have class after this one?”

He shook his head.

“So, how about this? Since Doyoung, you have all the notes to everything related to what we have discussed about the tragedy of the commons theory, you can work on the introduction and the development.” The boy nodded. “And Jaehyun and I will work out the research paper on Malawi and write down possible solutions.”

“Sure, that’s fine with me,” Doyoung said nonchalantly, but Jaehyun could tell that his friend was delighted that he was left with the easiest tasks. He almost snorted with laughter at the obvious relief his friend was exuding. “Deadline?”

“How about four days from now?” the girl suggested. “That’ll give us enough time to go through everything to write up the conclusion together and leave us an extra day to proofread anything.”

“Awesome,” Doyoung exclaimed. “I’ll send it to you, then!”

With that said, the male quickly ran out from the room, leaving Jaehyun and the girl alone in the classroom.

He let out a deep breath and shook his head. “You’re way too lax with him. You know it’s okay to give him more work, right?”

She shrugged in response, she didn’t look too bothered with how she split the work amongst them. “Easier this way. And besides, he basically did that part with his notes, so why add more work to him?”

“If you say so.”

And a small study session on university campus turned into a long study session at Jaehyun’s favourite café he had found while looking for an old bookstore. It led to a trip to the museum for an exhibition on neo-Impressionist paintings, which then led to a talk on foreign films, and then a viewing on foreign film at an old local theatre.

That week’s showing was La vita è bella, which coincidentally happened to be one of the girl’s favourite movies.

“I cannot believe that you didn’t cry by the end!” Jaehyun shouted out of frustration as they exited the movie theatre. “You are heartless!”

The girl laughed, which frustrated Jaehyun because he was still in tears even though more than ten minutes had passed since the movie’s ending. “I’ve watched this movie dozens of times. I think I’ve cried enough.”

“Great.” He groaned as he rubbed his eyes. “Now, everyone’s going to look at me weirdly when we go back to the campus.”

“I didn’t think that you were someone who cared much about other people’s opinions,” she replied lightheartedly.

Jaehyun raised an amused brow at the girl and crossed his arms as they made their way back to their university campus, making small talk along the way. “And you believe that we’ve hung out enough times for you to form such opinion of me?”

The girl let out a small scoff mixed with a laugh. “I believe that we hung out together almost every day either after or in-between our classes. So much that Johnny and the others are actually starting to complain about my absences. And believe me, that doesn’t happen much since we practically grew up together.”

“So, is that a yes?”

She hummed in wonder. “Enough to understand who you are as a person.”

“Well, my, my, what a bold claim,” he said in a teasing tone. “Should I quiz you?”

The girl harrumphed jokingly. “You don’t believe me?”

He chuckled. He couldn’t believe just how much fun was he having just by conversing with her. He liked the fact that in one moment, she could sprout out the most random fact or sentence, and the other, completely blow his mind away with her deep knowledge about certain topics. He believed that she was truly a walking paradox, in some sort of way.

Just when he thought he had figured her out completely, she kept surprising him every day.

And Jaehyun couldn’t believe how much he enjoyed her presence in his life.

It almost seemed too good to be true.

“Jaehyun!”

Both of them turned around abruptly, Jaehyun’s eyes searching for the source. His eyes slightly widened at the sight of his girlfriend prancing towards him. Her smile practically reached her ears before it was slowly washed away at the sight of the girl walking next to him.

“Naeun,” he blurted out in shock and hugged the girl back. “W-what are you doing here?”

“Thought I’d surprise you and ask you to grab an early dinner with me,” she exclaimed with her arms around his torso. “So, are you surprised?”

“Uh, yeah!” he said with an awkward chuckle as his eyes darted furiously between Naeun and the girl standing next to them.

“So.” Naeun finally let him go and stood by him. “Who is this?”

Jaehyun quickly made the introductions. The girl who used to be next to him quickly plastered a professional smile and extended a hand for his girlfriend to shake. 

She gave Naeun her name and added a curt, polite, “It is so nice to finally meet Jaehyun’s girlfriend—I’ve heard much about you.”

“Well, that’s a shame,” his girlfriend replied with a tight smile, “because I have never heard about you.”

Jaehyun chuckled awkwardly as his brows furrowed at his girlfriend’s sudden animosity. “Naeun, I did talk to you about her. Remember the article I was talking to you about? She’s–” His eyes widened as he realized he was about to give out the girl’s secret.

Luckily, the latter caught it and quickly jumped in, “I’m Jaehyun’s classmate. We share a few classes together.”

His shoulders sagged slightly in relief.

She then gave him a quick glance and squirmed uncomfortably under Naeun’s gaze. “Well, um, I’ll leave you two be, then.”

“Wait, no–” Jaehyun suddenly said as he grabbed hold of the girl’s hand. Both of their eyes quickly went to his hand, and he quickly released her, embarrassment getting hold of him. He quickly returned next to Naeun’s side and cleared his throat awkwardly. “Join us for dinner.”

For the first time in a while, her expression crumbled and Jaehyun was able to see just how ill at ease she seemed at the idea of having dinner with him and his girlfriend. And for a second, he swore he saw a flash of uncertainty and frustration in her eyes.

“O-oh,” she stuttered. The girl never stuttered—she had always been smooth with her words. Never fumbling. Never discomposed. “I really shouldn’t. I’ll be imposing and–”

“Nonsense,” Jaehyun interrupted. “Think of it as thanks for the favour you have done for me.”

“No, really,” she insisted back. “I really don’t want to be third-wheeling you two.”

Jaehyun didn’t understand why he was so desperate for the girl to spend more time with him. Albeit, his girlfriend was with them too. But in any way, they were supposed to spend the rest of the afternoon together, discussing the foreign film they had just watched over dinner. Naeun’s presence was unexpected, but it didn’t mean that their plans should be cancelled. It was a compromise that he was willing to make.

“You won’t be,” Jaehyun said as his eyes wandered around campus anxiously, not knowing who or what was he exactly looking for until his eyes landed on a pair of males. His expression immediately brightened up as he shouted, “Johnny! Taeyong!” and then waved them over.

The two immediately jogged over and greeted their club leader first before greeting Jaehyun. Their expressions were bright until they landed on Naeun. It then switched over to a polite smile as the two introduced themselves to her.

“I’m Naeun,” she said with a smile that seemed different than the one she had offered to Jaehyun’s female friend. “I’m Jaehyun’s girlfriend.”

“Jaehyun’s… girlfriend…?” Johnny repeated slowly. Jaehyun didn’t miss the quick look Johnny had given to his own best friend, who seemed to be fidgeting on place. He then addressed her, “What are you doing with Jaehyun and his girlfriend?”

“I was about to leave,” she mumbled, refusing to meet any of their eyes. “Thought that I’d take this opportunity to go home early, for once.”

“You’re going back home?” Taeyong questioned. “I thought you were planning on staying on campus for one more night?”

She shook her head. “Now that I think about it, maybe it’s best if I go back early. We have that party tomorrow, remember?”

“Oh,” Naeun interjected. “Are you guys talking about Jaehyun’s party at his grandparents?”

“No,” she replied with another polite smile. “It’s just another obligatory party our parents are forcing us to attend, so unfortunately, we cannot attend Jaehyun’s.”

“That is… unfortunate.”

“Is it a matchmaking party, again?” Johnny commented nonchalantly. “I’m getting sick of those.”

“A matchmaking party?” Naeun repeated. “Those still exists?”

“Apparently, since we’re still forced to attend them,” Johnny replied with a tight, unimpressed expression.

“Who is it this time?” Taeyong inquired.

“Some guy named Yoon–” The girl then shut herself up and shook her head. “You know what, we should go–”

Jaehyun could feel the cold sweat trickling down his back at this indescribable tension lingering in the air.

“Johnny! Taeyong!” Jaehyun almost shrieked, startling the three members. “I was just saying how she should join me and Naeun for an early dinner but she wouldn’t budge because she said that she’d be third-wheeling. Mind joining us?”

Johnny breathed in sharply. “Ooh, sorry man. I get her. I wouldn’t want to interrupt a date, either.”

“But–”

“Your girlfriend,” Taeyong interrupted, effectively shutting Jaehyun up with his charismatic low voice, “isn’t a university student here, am I correct?” Taeyong smiled tightly when Jaehyun nodded in response to his question. “Given that her… presence was unexpected, perhaps you should take this time to show her around and spend a bit more time as a couple.”

“Yong’s right,” the other girl agreed. “Anyway, the three of us have to go home today to prepare for tomorrow.”

“We do?” Johnny muttered in wonder.

“Yes, since I’m going home early and Taeyong’s our ride. But if he’s giving me a ride today, then he’s not going to come back just so he could drive you back tomorrow.”

The taller male let out a sigh of resignation. “You’re right.” He then turned to Jaehyun and bid him and Naeun farewell with a wave of his hand. “Bye, guys. See you, Monday!”

His girlfriend bid them farewell and then turned to Jaehyun with a crestfallen expression, almost pouting even. He couldn’t help but compare the two girls, and quickly shook away the thoughts that came with it. Especially since he preferred thinking about a girl’s pouting lips that were not his girlfriend’s.

“Something wrong?” he asked as he caressed her cheeks.

“She–” Naeun licked her lips. “She’s just a classmate, right? Nothing more?”

Jaehyun’s eyes blinked at her question, a bit taken aback. Naeun decided to use to word classmate specifically, almost as if she wanted to test him.

“She’s not just a classmate,” Jaehyun revealed, and the hurt was evident in Naeun’s eyes. “She’s a really good friend of mine who helped me out on numerous occasions. I think to say that she’s just a classmate would be stretching the truth a little.”

She bit her lip and then sighed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to put it that way.”

Jaehyun relaxed a little at her words. “I know.”

“Well, I’m glad that she’s not coming,” his girlfriend said offhandedly without giving an explanation and then turned to him with a smile he used to love so much.

“So? How about that campus tour and early dinner?”

Jaehyun practically plopped onto the sofa. He was home for the weekend, at the request of his grandparents who wanted to throw a party for his university’s alumni. He texted his only female friend, apologizing for how their plans were suddenly interrupted. The latter had replied that it was fine, but that was it. She never usually was a dry texter, and it worried him that her replies had been so curt ever since then.

“Yoonoh-ah!”

He immediately stood up and smiled. “Grandpa!”

The old man gave him a tight hug and pulled back as the former looked him up-and-down approvingly. “Look how grown up you are! Your grandma certainly knows how to pick a suit.”

“That, she does.”

“So, tell me,” he said as they both sat down on the sofa, “what is new in your life? How are your studies at SNU?”

“Great, actually,” Jaehyun replied with a bit of glee.

He usually couldn’t talk about it with his mother since the latter never went to college and never really did understand his frustrations about school, but his grandfather was a SNU alumnus—he understood everything that was going on.

“I recently wrote this feature article for the paper, I think you’d love it.”

“I’d be glad to read it!” His grandfather did seem genuinely excited and he gave him a firm pat on his shoulder. “Did I ever thank you for doing this for me?”

Jaehyun softened. “You don’t have to, Grandpa. I’m happy to do this for you.”

The other male looked down awkwardly as if he hadn’t done this much before. “Still, thank you, Yoonoh. This party means a lot to me and I hope it will come to mean a lot to you. Use this opportunity to form connections. Think of it as a networking event, hm? Your mum did mention that you were slightly apprehensive about this party.”

A side of his lips curled up. He couldn’t lie to his grandfather. “Yeah, I still am, but like you said, I’ll just think of this as a networking opportunity.”

“Good,” the older man continued. “So, tell me more about your circle. You mentioned that you write for the university paper? Are the people on the paper your friends?”

“Yes, they’re actually brilliant writers, probably better than I am. I’ve actually invited them to this party,” Jaehyun revealed. “I hope that is fine with you.”

His grandfather chuckled deeply. “This is a party in your honour, Yoonoh. Invite whomever you want.”

“I also invited someone… important to me,” Jaehyun added hesitantly. He himself didn’t understand the hesitation but since he already invited Naeun, it was best to warn his grandfather in advance. “I’ll introduce you two later during the party.”

“Oh?” His grandfather’s eyes had glinted in some sort of delight. “I look forward to it.” He then cocked his head to the side, motioning the door. “Shall we?”

It wasn’t even half an hour in when Jaehyun’s head started getting dizzy with the number of names and people he had to remember for his grandfather’s sake as he didn’t want to embarrass the latter. He could see his mother socializing with her old friends from his peripheral and hoped that she would come over and save him from all of this.

His expression immediately brightened when he saw his friends from the paper making their way towards him. He almost had to hold a laugh in as it was his first time seeing his friends in such formal clothing. The usual would have been a normal tee-shirt and a pair of jeans, and sweatpants when the paper’s deadline was coming up.

“You guys cleaned yourselves up pretty good,” Jaehyun commented with a small snicker as he gave them each a handshake. He then made space for his grandfather on the side as he introduced each of his friends to the latter. “Grandpa, this is Taeil, the chief editor of our paper, Ten, Doyoung, and Jungwoo. They’ve been with me since the beginning. Not only are they brilliant writers, they’re also amazing students.”

“Is that so?” his grandfather mused and shook their hands. “Tell me boys, what are you majoring in?”

“Double major in Journalism and Literature,” said Taeil.

“Mechanical engineering,” Jungwoo answered.

“Visual arts.”

“Mathematics,” said Doyoung, last.

“And you boys are all in the same year?” They all nodded in affirmation. “That means you guys are eligible for internships, now, huh? I know a few people in multiple industries, let me know if you guys are in a bind.”

His friends’ jaw all dropped in shock. “Th-thank you for your consideration,” Taeil said in awe.

“Anything for Jaehyun’s friends,” his grandfather replied nonchalantly. “If you guys are even just a tenth of how brilliant Jaehyun described you to be, then I am not at all worried. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I think I just saw some of my own guests. Please enjoy the rest of your evening.”

They all bowed to the elder before they all started gushing in excitement.

“Okay, you didn’t tell us that your grandfather was the Jung Yoonhyun aka the most successful newspaper magnate in the whole country!” Jungwoo gushed.

Jaehyun rubbed the back his neck. “Sorry, my mum had a falling out with them a while back so it wasn’t until recently that I started talking to them again. And I also didn’t want you guys to see me in a different light, or something.”

“Never,” Taeil shot back. “And even then, we wouldn’t see you in a different light since you don’t act like those pompous students you started hanging out with.”

“Pompous students?” Jaehyun repeated, confused.

Ten rolled his eyes. “He means Johnny and the gang.” He then frowned and crossed his arms. “By the way, you never told us who was your insider. Was it Johnny?”

Jaehyun pretended to zip his mouth. “You guys know I never divulge my sources. Where are your ethics, people?” And then punched his friend softly on the arm. “And hey, Johnny and the others are really not that bad when you get to know them.”

“Forget it.” Doyoung snorted. “Taeil has a prejudice against privileged people.”

Jaehyun’s brows furrowed. “Wait, I’m a privileged person, now, no?”

“You don’t count.”

“Yeah, well, Johnny’s best friend, you know the girl he’s always with?” Doyoung continued. “She’s actually not that bad. She can a bit over the place sometimes, but when you grow up in an environment and lifestyle like hers, I’m not surprised that they’re all like that.”

Jungwoo agreed. “Yeah, Jaehyun and I share a class with her. She’s never done anything that made me want to dislike her or something.” He then elbowed Jaehyun knowingly. “And I see that you two are close as ever.”

“Okay, so it’s settled,” Ten said with a clap of his hands. “Johnny and his friends are actually nice people, and Taeil is just a jerk for disliking them for no apparent reason.”

“Hey!”

“Jaehyun!”

His girlfriend finally arrived and Jaehyun leaned down to give a peck on the top of her head. “Hey, you’re here.”

“Yes,” she said as she took a deep breath. “I almost couldn’t find you. Did I miss anything?”

“You just missed my grandfather,” Jaehyun said. “Oh, and you already met the guys except for Jungwoo. Jungwoo, this is Naeun, my girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend?” Jungwoo replied, clearly surprised. Jaehyun gave him a look and his friend immediately regained his composure. “Yes, girlfriend—who else? It’s nice to meet you, Naeun.”

“Likewise,” she said with another smile. It seemed like she hadn’t noticed Jungwoo’s little slip-up.

“Yoonoh-ah!” He heard his grandfather come with a few of his guests following right behind him. “Meet some of my friends and their grandchildren who happen to go to the same university as you.”

“Yoonoh?” Naeun mumbled in wonder. “Is that your real name?”

“Yeah, it’s a long story,” he replied. “Come, I’ll introduce you to him.” He then turned to his friends from the newspaper. “I’ll talk to you guys, later.”

He walked up to his grandfather. “Grandfather, meet Naeun,” he introduced the two. “Naeun, meet my grandpa.”

“It is nice to finally meet you, sir,” she said as she shook the elder’s hand. “I’ve heard much about you.”

“Ah, yes,” the latter replied vaguely. “The girlfriend with whom you’re planning on travelling instead of accepting the internship I got you this summer.”

His girlfriend turned to him with a curious gaze and Jaehyun looked away, unable to bear the weight behind her eyes.

“Tell me, Naeun, what are you studying in university?”

“Oh,” she said slightly taken aback with the sudden question. “I’m currently not attending university. I decided to take a year off to figure out what I want to do later in life.”

“I see.” He switched his attention back to Jaehyun. “Anyway, here they come. I guess they got caught up with other people.”

Jaehyun was about to plaster a fake smile on, not knowing what to expect especially when it came to his friends, and hoped that the grandchildren were not as stuck-up as their elders. But his eyes instantly widened at an overly familiar group of six people and he rubbed his eyes, wondering if he had just hallucinated the scene.

“Yoonoh, these are the grandchildren of my closest friends from university,” his grandfather revealed with possibly, the biggest smile he had ever sported since the beginning of the event. A miracle “This is Suh Youngho, Lee Taeyong, Kang Seulgi, Wong Kunhang, Dong Sicheng, and–”

“I know them, Grandpa,” he suddenly blurted out.

“You do?”

“Yeah, we know Jae– I mean, Yoonoh,” Johnny said swiftly as if his presence didn’t bother him a single bit. “As a matter of fact, I’m part of the radio broadcasting club with him.”

“Well, that’s just wonderful!” his grandfather exclaimed. “Now, I know Yoonoh won’t force himself to make small talk with the guests that I introduce him to.”

The six all laughed along with the old man whereas Jaehyun and his girlfriend stood there awkwardly. Jaehyun’s eyes wandered to the girl who had been occupying his mind for the last 24 hours but the latter expertly avoided his gaze as she kept conversing with her grandfather with expert ease about foreign affairs.

“I heard that you became–” his grandfather’ glanced over at Naeun subtly, “–the club’s President.”

“Ah, yes,” Cerca Trova’s leader replied with a small smile and her chin high. “the members deemed me suitable for the role and has elected me for the position.”

“With your leadership skills and intellect, I wouldn’t be surprised,” he continued and then brought a hand on Jaehyun’s shoulders. “As a past member, do you think it’s too late for you to initiate my grandson into the club? No need to give him an executive position or anything, but I’d like him to get more familiar and comfortable with our world, if you understand what I mean.”

“Of course, it’s never too late,” she replied without never looking at Jaehyun properly, which was starting to irritate him to no end. “If anything, he’s already like a member of the club, seeing that he discovered our existence and managed to find tangible proof.”

“Is that so?” he exclaimed in delight. “I never spoke to him about it. I’m surprised that he was able to do so.”

“Well, I suppose that just shows just how much potential he has as a future journalist.”

“What is this club that you guys are talking about?” Naeun asked shyly.

Jaehyun looked over at the club’s executive members, wondering if it was okay to reveal the truth to an outsider.

“It’s this secret society that Jaehyun wrote about as a feature article for the school’s paper,” Johnny answered, surprising Jaehyun since he didn’t expect him out of all of them to disclose the truth. “I’m sure you read all about it. The article was tight.”

“Yeah, at first, I had my doubts,” Sicheng added. “but it was a well-written article. You should be proud of him, Mr. Jung.”

“I haven’t read it yet, but I’m already proud of him,” he said before he addressed their group’s leader. “So, tell me, has your grandparents found a suitable man for you to marry?”

The girl choked on the champagne she was sipping as she listened to his grandfather. Taeyong immediately patted her back whereas Johnny handed her a napkin for her to wipe her lips.

Jaehyun immediately averted his eyes, not understanding why he felt so uncomfortable watching the scene. But his heart dropped when he heard the word marry coming out from his grandfather’s lips. He never knew that the girl was supposed to marry someone anytime soon. She never mentioned it.

But if she were supposed to marry someone of her grandparents’ liking, then why did she even bother to confess to him?

He didn’t understand his sudden frustration at the situation.

“Ah, I see that the top two contenders are still Youngho and Taeyong,” he said in a teasing tone.

Jaehyun’s head immediately whipped up at his statement and then swivelled to see the girl’s reaction.

“May I be so polite to inquire why Mr. Jung is so curious about my… future engagement?”

“Well, since my grandson finally made his debut into society,” he said, “I was thinking of speaking with your grandparents about him being a possible candidate.”

Now, it was Jaehyun’s turn to choke on nothing. “Grandpa–”

Without a warning, Naeun stormed off, leaving their little group with some sort of awkward tension. Jaehyun politely excused himself before running after his girlfriend. He ran around the mansion before deciding that perhaps she was outside. He found her leaning against the gate right outside, her arms crossed.

“Hey,” he said in a little voice, afraid that he’ll scare her off.

She sighed deeply and turned to him. “What am I doing here, Jaehyun?”

He didn’t understand. “You’re here for me, of course,” he replied.

His girlfriend let out a self-deprecating chuckle. “No, we all know that’s a lie.”

“Wh-what do you mean?”

“I mean, there is no place for me in your life anymore,” she replied bluntly. “Why didn’t you tell me that your grandfather found an internship for you?”

Jaehyun paused as he didn’t understand why it was so hard for him to tell her the truth. Instead, he said, “Because we already made plans to travel for the summer.”

She scoffed. “And you thought that not telling me about it was a good move on your part?” Naeun then pushed herself off from the gate and brought a hand to her forehead as she laughed bitterly. “Did you even see the way your grandfather looked at me? As if I– I was beneath you guys?”

“You’re not beneath–”

“I have never felt so humiliated in my life,” she mumbled under her breath.

“I’m sorry,” Jaehyun quickly apologized. “I’ll talk to my grandfather and–”

“You think it’s just your grandfather?” Naeun cut him off.

Jaehyun’s hand clenched in frustration. Somewhere deep inside him knew that they were going to break up eventually—he couldn’t bear lying to himself anymore. But it had never been his intention to hurt Naeun like this. He never wanted to hurt her in the process. Perhaps a part of him genuinely thought that it was a phase that was going to pass quickly. But if he couldn’t lie to himself, then how could he lie to Naeun about his true feelings?

“I thought I was wrong,” Naeun said, her head facing her feet, “when I visited you at your campus yesterday and I saw you with her. You just looked so different. You looked… alive. And I kept telling myself that she was just a classmate—a friend, you insisted—but I’m not a fool.” She then looked up to him with pleading eyes. “Tell me that I’m wrong, Jaehyun-ah.”

Jaehyun remained silent, his fist clenching and unclenching, trembling by his own cowardice and how he couldn’t even reassure his girlfriend that she had nothing to worry about.

“Tell me!”

“I’m– I’m sorry,” Jaehyun gasped out, “I’m sorry…”

Jaehyun thought she was going to get mad at him—anything—but she did none of that. Instead, the girl sighed and let out a bitter laugh, “I’m sorry too.”

Jaehyun looked at her, utterly confused by this turn of events. Why wasn’t Naeun yelling at him, anymore? Why wasn’t she mad that he fell for someone else?

“People change. And their feelings too,” Naeun told him. “I shouldn’t get mad at you for falling for someone else.”

“I–”

“I’m going to stop making you look like you’re the bad guy in this situation,” she then said. “I’m not mad… just frustrated that I am not angry. I expected this awful feeling to overcome me the second you confess, but I’m… relieved.” She smiled at him. “I’m relieved that you found someone who looks at you the same way you look at them.”

Jaehyun looked away. He knew the girl liked him, but he doubted that the depth of her feelings could be compared to his, especially since she looked like she was betrayed by him for not telling her about Naeun—which was understandable. But from that, he just assumed that even if things had ended between him and Naeun, the chances of them becoming a couple vanished.

“I’m kind of jealous, you know?” Naeun commented lightheartedly. “I’ve never seen you look at me the same way you look at her.”

“I– I’m sorry,” Jaehyun mumbled. That was all he could do at the moment—apologize.

“Why are you apologizing?” Naeun asked. Jaehyun took a look at his now ex-girlfriend’s face and found that there was no remorse or regret present in her expression.

“Go chase your happiness.”

Jaehyun has a girlfriend.

Four words that haunted me ever since I have met the latter. I sighed as I leaned back against the leather seat of the car, ignoring the questioning look my friends had given me. Ever since yesterday, there was an odd tension in the air as if they were afraid of saying the wrong thing—saying something that could set me off.

Like a ticking time bomb.

“I didn’t know that he was taken,” Johnny mumbled next to me, “or else, I would have told you about it.”

I let out a low chuckle. “Don’t tell me you actually feel bad for me?”

“I’m just saying,” he continued, “he shouldn’t have led you on like that.”

I pursed my lips. “He didn’t.” I insisted again when I saw the look on his face. “He didn’t. So, let’s just focus on having fun at this lame obligatory party, please? What time are Seulgi, Sicheng and Hendery going to arrive?”

“They’re already there waiting for us,” Taeyong answered from my other side.

“Did your parents say anything about this Yoonoh guy?” Johnny asked. “My parents– Actually no, my grandparents want me to befriend him. Something about him being the grandkid of their friends from uni or something. Yuck.”

I gave him a side-eye. “Youngho, we’re friends because of our grandparents.”

He waved my comment aside. “Not the same thing.”

I gave Taeyong a pleading look and he shrugged in response. He had always been the rational one between the three of us, the cool-headed one. But sometimes, that also meant that he’d stay out of the arguments I would have with Johnny just so that he could remain neutral.

At our arrival, we immediately greeted our family elders first before reuniting with our friends. Seulgi, Sicheng, and Hendery already looked bored to death. Even with our arrival, it looked like they were dreading the party even more.

“Well, you know what we usually do,” Johnny said as he popped a bottle of champagne out of nowhere and wiggled his eyebrows. “To cope with painfully boring parties, we form a sub-party with a small touch of alcohol.”

At that, my friends’ expressions immediately brightened. As we were in the search for an empty room inside this huge mansion, all of our grandparents suddenly joined our little circle, accompanied by Mr. Jung, who was a newspaper magnate and the grandfather of this Yoonoh guy we were supposed to get ourselves acquainted with.

Johnny immediately hid the bottle of champagne behind him and mustered a smile as we were faced with our grandparents’ small interrogation (i.e. “Where do you think you youngsters are going?”).

“We were thinking of searching for the guest of honour!” Taeyong replied smoothly. “We’ve heard a lot about your grandson, Mr. Jung.”

Thanks to Taeyong’s wittiness, we managed to evade a small crisis. But it also dragged us into an abnormally long and unnecessary conversation we were trying to avoid from the start. It then led Mr. Jung of wanting to formally introduce us to his grandson, who—to our surprise—was also attending SNU.

“Have you guys even heard of someone named Jung Yoonoh that attends our school?” Hendery asked under his breath as we followed the newspaper magnate.

“Well, you don’t really pay attention to anyone else other than us and Cerca Trova, so I already know your answer,” Seulgi replied. When Hendery gave her a look, silently asking her the same question he had asked, she then sighed and looked away from him with a small huff. “And no, I’ve never heard of him, either.”

“I didn’t even know that he has a grandson,” Sicheng commented. “What kind of person do you guys think he is?”

“Vapid? Arrogant? Spoiled?” Johnny added.

“Well, that’s rich coming from us,” I replied with a small snort.

He winked. “Exactly why I am confident we’ll get along just fine.”

Mr. Jung stopped and clapped on the back on a young man, whom I assumed was his grandson. Hendery abruptly turned around and made us halt in our tracks. “Okay, what’s our game plan?”

“Game plan?” Taeyong repeated, confused. “Why do we need a game plan?”

“Like, do we hate him? Do we like him?”

“We haven’t even met him,” I deadpanned.

I then pushed him slightly towards Mr. Jung so that we could get a move on. The earlier we were done meeting the man’s grandson, the earlier we could leave.

“Yoonoh, these are the grandchildren of my closest friends from university,” Mr. Jung said as soon as he saw us. “This is Suh Youngho, Lee Taeyong, Kang Seulgi, Wong Kunhang, Dong Sicheng, and–”

My eyes almost bulged out in surprise when I realized just who exactly was Jung Yoonoh. I could tell that my friends were surprised as well with their slightly agape mouth. They usually weren’t ones to be easily shocked either.

Jaehyun was the first one out of us to regain his composure. “I know them, Grandpa.”

“You do?” his grandfather asked with delight.

“Yeah, we know Jae– I mean, Yoonoh,” Johnny said swiftly as if his presence didn’t bother him a single bit. “As a matter of fact, I’m part of the radio broadcasting club with him.”

“Well, that’s just wonderful!” his grandfather exclaimed. “Now, I know Yoonoh won’t force himself to make small talk with the guests that I introduce him to.”

I retreated slightly into my small shell when I noticed Jaehyun’s date.

Of course, he’d bring his girlfriend. I thought to myself, feeling a little bit stupid. Who else was he going to bring?

I was thankful that my friends were doing such a good job at entertaining Mr. Jung’s questions, until the latter directed them to me specifically. Although I was a bit startled, I appreciated the distraction it had provided me. Not to mention how conscious I was of Jaehyun’s eyes boring at me.

Stop it.

Stop looking at me.

Stop looking at me like that when your girlfriend is standing right next to you.

Mr. Jung called me out once again after Taeyong wrapped up on his take on foreign affairs.

“Yes?” I said as I broke out of my small reverie.

Mr. Jung seemed wary of Jaehyun’s girlfriend as he asked me, “I heard that you became… the club’s President.”

I blinked, momentarily forgetting that he was both an alumnus and a past member of Cerca Trova. “Ah, yes. The members deemed me suitable for the role and has elected me for the position.”

“With your leadership skills and intellect, I wouldn’t be surprised,” he continued and then brought a hand on Jaehyun’s shoulders. “As a past member, do you think it’s too late for you to initiate my grandson into the club? No need to give him an executive position or anything, but I’d like him to get more familiar and comfortable with our world, if you understand what I mean.”

I tried not to let the surprise show on my face. 

From the numerous conversations I’ve had with Jaehyun, the thing that was so distinctive and characteristic of him was that he knew what he wanted to become after graduation—had known for a while, in fact. Mr. Jung was aware of Cerca Trova’s true goal as an alumnus, so why would he want to initiate his grandson to the club?

I wanted to refuse because initiating Jaehyun into the club would only confuse him further. And I didn’t want him to suffer the same fate as we did. Yes, Mr. Jung was a newspaper magnate and perhaps, Jaehyun will inherit it one day. But he wasn’t made to be a businessman.

Jaehyun wanted to write.

I stole a glance over at Jaehyun, wondering what were his thoughts were on the subject, but his face didn’t show a single hint of his true feelings. I mentally sighed to myself and plastered a smile onto my face as I replied,

“Of course, it’s never too late,” I replied and averted my eyes when Jaehyun’s met with mine. I decided to investigate slightly what the elder had in mind. “If anything, he’s already like a member of the club, seeing that he discovered our existence and managed to find tangible proof.”

Johnny subtly elbowed me, silently asking me what exactly was I doing.

I ignored him.

“Is that so?” Mr. Jung exclaimed. “I never spoke to him about it. I’m surprised that he was able to do so.”

I gave him a tight smile. “Well, I suppose that just shows just how much potential he has as a future journalist.”

Out of nowhere, Naeun asked, “What is this club that you guys are talking about?”

Jaehyun looked over at us. He was probably wondering if it was okay to reveal the truth to an outsider.

“It’s this secret society that Jaehyun wrote about as a feature article for the school’s paper,” Johnny answered. “I’m sure you read all about it. The article was tight.”

I tried not to glare at Johnny. Just what was he planning?

“Yeah, at first, I had my doubts,” Sicheng continued, “but it was a well-written article. You should be proud of him, Mr. Jung.”

I tried not to make my skepticism obvious, but really, even Sicheng? Who was against Jaehyun writing the article from the beginning? I tried to make sense of my friends’ dubious plans—they had always been mischievous—as I sipped on the champagne.

“I haven’t read it yet, but I’m already proud of him,” Mr. Jung said before switching his attention back to me.

This time, it was Taeyong’s turn to elbow me when he realized that I wasn’t paying attention to the elder. I hissed at him before going back to my flute of champagne.

“So, tell me, has your grandparents found a suitable man for you to marry?”

The sparkling liquid went down the wrong tube, making me cough. Taeyong probably felt bad and helped me by patting on my back whereas Johnny was trying to hold his laughter in as much as he could as he handed me his handkerchief.

For some reason, my eyes landed briefly on particular handsome journalist as I wiped my lips, careful not to wipe away my lip makeup and to keep my expression as indifferent as possible.

God, he looks so good in that suit.

Mr. Jung laughed wholeheartedly as he said in a teasing tone, “Ah, I see that the top two contenders are still Youngho and Taeyong.” 

Jaehyun’s head immediately whipped up at his statement and then swivelled around, facing me all of a sudden. Properly facing me this time. He looked betrayed. And I refrained myself from scoffing out loud at his hypocrisy.

My engagement to either Johnny and Taeyong had never been set properly. It was just something that our family elders had discussed even before the three of us were born. What was the point of telling him of a possible engagement to either of my best friends? Unlike him, I didn’t hide that I had a significant other.

I cleared my throat as I kept my eyes on Jaehyun. “May I be so polite to inquire why Mr. Jung is so curious about my… future engagement?”

“Well, since my grandson finally made his debut into society,” he said, “I was thinking of speaking with your grandparents about him being a possible candidate.”

“Grandpa–”

All of a sudden, Jaehyun’s girlfriend stormed off. I only realized belatedly how insensitive the conversation was, momentarily forgetting her presence within the conversation. I slightly felt bad for Naeun. I never expected Mr. Jung to bring up my engagement when Jaehyun’s girlfriend was probably already introduced to him. But it was my fault for not seeing it coming.

I tried to ignore the ugly green monster that was threatening to overcome me as I watched Jaehyun run after Naeun.

“Children, excuse me for a moment, I see my other friends.”

We all bowed as the elder made his exit. It took every ounce of my energy to not lash out. I understood perfectly just how cruel and insensitive the people in our world could be, but for whatever reason, I thought maybe Jaehyun’s grandfather was different. After all, they shared the same DNA.

“Well, that was unexpected,” Sicheng said with a sharp exhale.

“Never mind that.” Seulgi frowned. “Are we really going to initiate Jaehyun into the club?”

“Well, he’s a legacy, so we can’t say no if he wants to join,” Johnny refuted.

Taeyong rubbed his jaw pensively. “Does he even want to join, though? Mr. Jung did say he wants us to initiate him so he can get used to quote-unquote our world, but what if he doesn’t want to? He’s doing just fine without all this glitz and glamour.”

“Um, so we’re not going to address the fact that she’s getting engaged to either Johnny or Taeyong?” Hendery cut in, his eyes wide. “And now Jaehyun might be in the race?”

I snapped at all of them. “No one is getting engaged.” I breathed out sharply as I kneaded my temple, suddenly feeling a headache coming on and the alcohol that I drank previously was not helping my case. “And about Jaehyun’s membership, we’ll talk about it during our meeting. For now, let’s just…”

“Let’s find a room where we won’t be forced to make polite conversations,” Taeyong continued my train of thought, rescuing me. I mouthed him a silent ‘thanks’.

Johnny flanked my side as we searched for an empty room. “Are you sure you don’t want to go after him?”

It was useless to act stupid with the giant. “You mean, interrupt the love birds? No, thank you.”

He rolled his eyes. He was awfully calm about this whole situation—the complete opposite of my current state of mind. “I didn’t mean it that way. Given how she ran off, they’re probably in an argument. I’m saying, go after Jaehyun and give him your support as a friend.”

I rubbed my arms awkwardly. “I’m not even sure whether he wants me as a friend or not.”

“What, because of his girlfriend?” Johnny said mockingly, spitting out that last word distastefully. I slapped his arm in response. “Ouch! What was that for?”

“Have a little bit of respect for her, would you?” I replied. “Especially with the way Jaehyun’s grandfather treated her.”

Johnny blew a raspberry. “Okay, but Mr. Jung’s attitude towards her aside, do you really think I will have an ounce of respect for her if she were to tell Jaehyun to stop being friends with you? If she truly trusted Jaehyun, she wouldn’t have to ask him that.”

Once in a blue moon, Suh Youngho made valid points.

So, where did that leave me?

“God, I hate you,” I said as I spun around and headed towards the exit, where I had a feeling Jaehyun would be.

“Only sometimes,” my best friend replied cheekily.

I made my way for the exit, occasionally greeting back the people who mentioned how long it had been since they last seen me, and breathed out a sigh of relief when I noticed Jaehyun sitting on the ground against the gate.

Alone.

Ignoring how my mum would chastise me for getting my dress dirty, I took a seat next to the dejected male. I bit my bottom lip in contemplation, wondering just how I should begin what seemed to be an awkward conversation. A conversation that I was certain that Jaehyun didn’t want to have, but one I deemed was necessary.

I think.

“Are you okay?” I said, lamely.

“What do you think?” Jaehyun snapped at me. “I just got dumped.”

I had a feeling that he was mad—and he had the right to be, of course—but I never expected him to talk to me this way. I gulped down the anxiety that crept upon me and asked, “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.” His voice was firm, unwavering. “Just go back to your two fiancés or something.”

I flinched back, alarmed by the tone of his voice. I understood that he was angry and perhaps resentful. God, of course, I did. But I didn’t come out of my way, fighting against my rationality and my anxiety, and look for him—worried sick about him—so that I was going to be disrespected this way.

“Okay,” I said with a snort. “I get it that you’re mad—whatever. But you’re misplacing your anger. Maybe you’re scared. Maybe you’re confused. And so, you’re picking a fight. You know that, yeah?”

I was resilient in keeping my foot to the ground. I wasn’t about to let him talk to me that way when I haven’t done anything to deserve such treatment. But what I failed to take into consideration was the teary red eyes, the sniffing nose, and the complete utter devastation on his face.

I hated how it automatically rendered me weak.

“I’m sorry,” I ended up saying softly. “D-do you need a hug?”

He shook his head before reburying his face into his arms. “It’s alright, just give me a minute to settle a little. And then we can talk about my initiation.”

I felt unsettled with the way he was compartmentalizing his feelings like that. Could they be so easily discarded like that so that he could move on to the next thing? As much as he respected and admired his grandfather and wanted to make the latter proud, what about his own feelings, though? What about his own ambitions?

I got up and patted the dust away from my bottom. “No, there will be no initiation so there’s nothing to talk about.”

At my words, Jaehyun immediately whipped his head and pushed himself up at a frightening speed. “What do you mean there’s no initiation?”

“I said what I said.” I crossed my arms. “You will not be initiated into Cerca Trova.”

He had the gall to scoff at me. “I’m a legacy. You can’t do this to me.”

“Says who?” I fired back. “As far as I’m concerned, I’m the President with the right to veto whatever decision the execs make. And as President, I don’t think you’re fit to be part of the club.”

“Why? Because I’m not part of your clique? I’m not good enough for you?”

I narrowed my eyes at the male, not liking where this was going one bit. “I don’t know what you’re trying to imply here, but I’m trying to be your friend, right now.”

“And how exactly are you doing that?”

“You honestly believe that you want to be part of Cerca Trova? That you’re doing this for yourself and not for your grandfather?”

At my question, he froze. “Wh-what is that supposed to mean?”

“I think in here,” I poked at his chest, where his heart was, “you know exactly what I mean. But right now, you’re lost, confused. You’re not thinking rationally like you usually do. So, I’m going to ask you, once again.”

I took a step back and stared right at him, unflinching.

“What do you want to become when you turn into an adult?”

He remained unresponsive.

“Will you be happy if you follow whatever plan your grandfather has for you?”

A couple of weeks had passed since the incident at Jaehyun’s grandparents’ mansion, and I hadn’t spoken to him ever since. We still shared the same two classes but both of us had gotten out of our ways to expertly avoid one another. But I was probably the one who made more efforts.

Johnny didn’t understand why I didn’t take this opportunity to make Jaehyun my boyfriend.

His words, not mine.

I never realized how long it had been since we last spoken until Johnny and I were both in line to take our graduation pictures. Johnny, Taeyong and I decided to apply for early graduation.

“It’s obvious that you two share mutual feelings, so why delay it?” he said offhandedly and then furrowed his brows as he asked, “Wait, is this about his initiation to Cerca Trova?”

I sighed, feeling a bit tired. “It’s more complicated than you think.”

“You’re still not letting him in?” Taeyong said from my other side.

“It’s not my decision to make,” I retorted back. “If that’s what he wants, then I’d be happy to welcome him. But right now, he doesn’t know what he wants. Not just about the club but also… from me.”

My friends obviously knew what I meant. To be in a relationship with either one of us… it wasn’t something to be taken light of by both parties. We were all raised to shoulder the responsibilities that came our life, but what about those who weren’t? Jaehyun might be part of the same world now, but it didn’t mean that he would easily adhere by the same values.

And I didn’t let him forget that.

Falling this hard for him this far along, of course I’d be over the moon if ever we were to be in a serious relationship. But if that meant there was the possibility that Jaehyun could regret making his decision based on his grandfather during this period of confusion, I’d rather not be with him. Even if it meant that I was headed for a broken heart.

Jaehyun had been thrown into this state of confusion, by not only his grandfather, but also by his ex-girlfriend. Distancing myself from him so that he could sort out his feelings properly was something I should do.

“Did you tell Jaehyun that you were graduating early?” Taeyong asked.

I grimaced at his question. “Why would I go out of my way to tell him that I’ll be graduating?” I then pushed him towards the photographer who was waiting for the next student. “Go on, we don’t have all day.”

Taeyong stuck his tongue out at me and sat down in front of the photographer.

Both Johnny and I stayed silent and watched Taeyong getting his pictures taken. We would occasionally give him some tips, but the boy was so good-looking, what was the point.

“You really do like him, huh?” Johnny mumbled out of nowhere.

I choked on nothing. “What makes you say so?”

“Because,” he said as he fixed my graduation cap and flicked my nose, “if it were any other guy, you wouldn’t care this much.”

I narrowed my eyes at the taller male. “Have I mentioned that I hate you?”

“Several times but I know you still love me,” he replied nonchalantly. “Taeyong’s done now—it’s your turn.”

I groaned in fake disgust before making my way towards the stool in front of the green screen. It was only half an hour later that the three of us were done. It was a little bit after one, so we decided to head out for a late lunch.

We were debating on what kind of cuisine we should go for when Johnny suddenly halted in his steps and waved at someone afar. I didn’t pay much attention—I assumed it was just one of Johnny’s friends that we didn’t know about—and continued arguing with Taeyong about lunch.

It was only until his friend got closer that I realized that I should have paid more attention.

Jaehyun paused just a tiny bit before resuming his walk towards us. Meanwhile, I cursed at Johnny as much as I could in my head while trying to my best to keep my composure.

Hey, what’s up?

No, that sounds too awkward.

How have you been?

Wait, is that too stiff?

“Hey, guys,” Jaehyun greeted us with an easy-going smile. “Done with a class?”

I missed my timing to be cordial, great.

“No, actually, we just finished taking our graduation pictures,” Johnny replied.

I peeked over at Jaehyun, wondering what kind of expression he’d sport after hearing the news. But he kept his smile on, completely unbothered by the piece of information revealed to him. I sighed through my nose. I didn’t know what I expected.

“You should attend our graduation ceremony,” Taeyong said. “Cerca Trova will be having an after-party. As a new member, you should also come so that you can get familiar with the other members.”

“As a new member…?” Jaehyun’s eyes glanced over at me before averting back to Taeyong. He then cleared his throat. “Oh, um, I thought that I wasn’t allowed to be in the club?”

Johnny subtly pinched my side and I hissed at the pain. Though, that caught Jaehyun’s attention. I made a mental note to myself that I should take revenge on Johnny, but focused on the task ahead.

“It doesn’t matter what I think or decide,” I answered curtly. “After graduation, I’ll be gone so my decision will be voided. Might as well properly introduce you as a new member.”

Taeyong laughed awkwardly as he slung an arm around my shoulders. “Excuse her, she’s a little bit grumpy because she hasn’t had lunch yet. So, we should go before she gets even crankier.”

“O-oh, uh, sure,” Jaehyun said with a hand behind his neck.

“The graduation ceremony is next Friday,” Johnny informed him as we slowly walked away. “Be there or be square!”

The few weeks leading up to graduation had been nothing but eventful and stressful. Those who were planning on graduating early didn’t have a choice but to pass all of their classes.

It was the last hurrah of a chapter in our lives.

In-between the numerous studying, exams, and essays, I didn’t think that I would even have the time and luxury to ponder whether Jaehyun was going to attend the graduation ceremony or not. But the boy managed to slip in-between the small crevices of my mind that emerged during the occasional breaks that Taeyong had forced me to take.

Next thing I knew, I was wearing an indigo graduation gown and cap.

My parents along with Johnny’s and Taeyong’s attended the ceremony together. So, it wasn’t a surprise that the six of them were circled up and chatting with Seulgi, Sicheng, and Hendery.

“Congratulations on graduating, my dear,” my parents said and pecked me on both cheeks.

“Thank you,” I said and then accepted the congratulations from my friends.

“Can’t believe you three are going ahead without us,” Hendery whined after he handed me a bouquet of roses and carnations. “Who’s going to keep Seulgi in check now that you guys are going to be gone?”

I hugged him back and messed his hair. “You’ll be fine, Kunhang.”

Hendery gasped dramatically. “Are you going to die soon? Why did you call me by my Chinese name?”

“Because it’s still your name doofus,” I said with a roll of my eyes.

And while the others chatted and took pictures among themselves, my eyes wandered around the venue, hoping to see a certain journalist amidst the crowd. I guess my disappointment was evident when Johnny gave me an apologetic smile.

As we were about to enter the car to head over for our after-party, I then heard someone shout my name in the distance. I looked around and asked Seulgi who was behind me if she heard something. The girl’s brows furrowed as she focused on her surroundings and shook her head. I nodded my head, about to get in the car when Seulgi abruptly pulled me out and shouted, “Wait!”

I tried not to grunt at the sheer force she was using to get me out of the vehicle. The girl might be slim but God was she strong for someone of her stature.

I frowned as I tried to make sense of what exactly was going on. “What?” I said to Seulgi, who then pointed me to a running figure in the distance. After a few seconds, I could make out the silhouette to be Jaehyun.

“Oh,” I lamely said.

My friends got into the car, giving me some privacy.

“We’ll head out first,” Johnny told me with a wink and a cringey peace sign before the car drove off, not leaving me any time to reply.

Jaehyun was breathless by the time he had reached me, beads of sweat dripping from his forehead. He was in a formal attire, which made me wonder-

“I did attend the graduation ceremony,” he said in-between deep breaths, “but I thought it would be rude of me to come and not give you something so I went to the nearest flower shop, not realizing that it’d take me this long.”

He then handed me a beautiful blue single hydrangea bloom wrapped in the latest issue of The Daily SNU and then mumbled, his ears evidently red. “Congratulations on graduating early.”

I softly smiled at the sight and accepted the flower. “Thank you.”

A pregnant silent then fell upon us. As expected since we hadn’t spoken properly in a while. We both opened up our mouths at the same time, causing me to giggle.

“You go first,” I ended up saying.

Jaehyun cleared his throat several times, to the point where I seriously thought that he might have choked on something. He then pulled at his tie and unbuttoned his shirt, saying that it was too hot and needed some air.

“Do you…” he started to say

“Do I…?”

“Do you not like me anymore?”

My jaw literally dropped at his unexpected question – so unexpected that it rendered me completely speechless and stumbling upon my words. The person that asked me the question seemed even more embarrassed that I was. 

Jaehyun was literally about to turn around and run away as he said, “I’m so sorry, let me do over. I don’t know what came over me.”, his hands covering his reddening cheeks.

“Wait,” I said as I pulled him back and kept my hand firmly wrapped around his. “where did that question come from?”

He avoided my eyes with expert ease. “I-I mean, you’ve been avoiding me… and didn’t even tell me that you applied for early graduation… What was I supposed to think?”

I chuckled to myself as I didn’t foresee that my own plan was going to backfire on me.

“Jaehyun, I haven’t been avoiding you.”

“You haven’t?” he said, surprised.

“Well, yes, maybe I avoided you just a little,” I admitted reluctantly. “But most importantly, I was trying to give you space.”

“Space?”

“You were going through a lot during that time,” I explained. “You know, with your overwhelming grandfather and your breakup. You had much to think about, and I didn’t want to add more onto your plate.”

“Oh,” Jaehyun chuckled awkwardly. “Yeah, that makes a lot more sense, now.”

I raised a brow at him. “Wait, so you really thought that I didn’t like you anymore? That my feelings were gone just like that?”

“W-well, I mean, it’s possible, right?” He kept his eyes on the ground. “I did get mad at you even though you didn’t do anything to deserve that.” He exhaled deeply. “I’m sorry.”

My eyes softened at his apology. “I know you are.” He looked confused, like a lost puppy. I raised the stem of hydrangea and waved it around a little. “Blue hydrangea symbolizes gratitude and understanding, and usually is always a thoughtful way of admitting that you’re sorry. Unless, I’m reading too much into–”

“No!” he immediately cut me off. “You’re right. I am sorry, and I am grateful not only for your understanding, but just about… everything.”

“So, does this mean that you thought about it clearly and have made up your mind?” I asked as I let go of his hand, but he refused to let mine go. He grabbed a hold of my hand and clasped them together tightly, almost as if he was afraid.

“Yeah,” he answered firmly, his eyes clear.

“What have you decided, then?”

He took a deep breath. “I’ll join Cerca Trova.”

“You will?”

He nodded assertively. “Yeah, I figured it was a nice way to network too. I’m still going to chase my dreams and become a first-class journalist that gets to travel the world and tell stories.” Jaehyun then shrugged. “Just figured that there are many other ways to do so, and perhaps the club will help me navigate through this newly opened path.”

“That’s great,” I answered with smiling eyes.

Jaehyun then slowly approached me, his face just lingering a few centimetres above mine, and he whispered, “So?”

“So?” I repeated in the same soft tone.

He gently pressed his forehead against mine with his eyes closed and asked me in a small murmur, “Will you be my girlfriend?”

“I don’t know,” I answered teasingly. “Did you ask your grandfather for his permission, first?”

“Haha, very funny,” he said as he smoothly placed his hands behind my waist without moving away. “Can you please answer my question? I’m trying to be serious, here.”

I bit my bottom lip and nodded. “Yes, I’ll be your girlfriend.”

“C-can I kiss you?” he then shyly asked.

I almost cooed at the fact that he actually asked for my permission, but decided not to tease him any further as I said, “Yes.”

Jaehyun gently cupped my cheeks with his hands. “I think I love you.” He quickly added, “I mean, I know I do. I love you.”

These words were what I’d been longing to hear for so long. I basically squeaked when I asked timidly, “Really? You’re not–”

Jaehyun then sealed my lips, silencing me. This sweet kiss of his was his answer. It intoxicated me, and I responded to it in kind. His kisses were so soft and tender. I was starting to think that I enjoyed these sweet kisses. I don’t think I could ever get tired of them.

“Say it,” he mumbled against my lips. “Say it back.”

“I love you too.”

I was suddenly overcome with shyness and happiness all at once.

His vibrating phone interrupted us and he sent me an apologetic grin as he checked out the content of his device. He chortled and revealed to me what was sent to him, “Johnny said that he’s happy for us and that everyone’s waiting for us.” He tilted his head at me, slightly in awe. “How did he even know?”

I shrugged. “Johnny can be a bit of a mystery sometimes.” I then pulled him towards the direction of the university’s parking lot, where my car was. “Let’s head over to the after-party before Johnny makes a scene.”

Jaehyun followed me without any hesitation and swung our arms around giddily.

“Hey,” he then said. “I forgot to ask you an important question. I guess it’s better late than never.”

I hummed in response as he had piqued my curiosity. “What is it?”

He gave me a childish grin and suddenly pecked my nose.

“What do you want to do after graduation?”

THE END. 

© SMOLL-TANGERINE [2020]. All rights reserved.

[jungwooisms]

☾ - angst | ❥ - suggestive content  | ❈ - nsfw content | ☼ - fluff

mvse | ☾❥❈☼ | criminal au | tba | teaser

↳ a string of bloodied murders begin to haunt your city and as you search the scenes a few details become scarily apparent the further you look into them. and what, or who, are mvse?

blue diner | ☾❥☼ | 12.5k ↳ after returning to your hometown to attend your brother’s wedding, you’re reacquainted with a past you thought you’d long distanced yourself from.

heat lightning | ☾❥☼ | 9.5k ↳ it’s been nearly a year since you’d left lee taeyong as a memory only belonging in your adolescence. only a year since you’d decided to move on. but now that he’s back you find yourself more conflicted than ever. (blue diner sequel)

hwarang {prologue} | ☾❥☼ | historical au

aphelion | ☾❥☼ | archaelogy au | 12k | ↳ the past catches up to you at an archeology exhibit in the italian town of pompeii. feelings trapped and unknown come to light when you end up face to face with someone you thought you’d never see again.

hwarang {prologue} | ☾❥☼ | historical au

a burning hill | ☾☼ | 7.6k ↳ all it takes is a shinkansen, a cup of coffee and a soccer player to turn everything on its head and make you appreciate life just a little bit more.

noppera-bō ↳ unable to escape the opression of her family and husband to be, rumors fly around of a woman who’s murdered four. sensing something wrong with this story, the medicine seller decides to investigate himself, finding much more than he or the woman bargained for.

hwarang {prologue} | ☾❥☼ | historical au

hwarang | ☾☼ | historical au ↳ act i   {55.7k} ↳ act ii   {25.5k} ↳ act iii 

↳ caught in the crossfire of political tumult, you find shelter in the compounds of a group of elite warriors, the hwarang. as time passes, you find yourself befriending and caring for the men here, trying to tackle a burgeoning relationship as you continue to seek out your missing father.

gekokujou | ☾❥☼ | ↳ part i   {21k} ↳ kim doyoung left his home in search of himself; yet when a collection of both familiar and unfamiliar faces surface, he finds that he may just be a a part of something much larger than he anticipated.

hwarang {prologue} | ☾❥☼ | historical au

i don’t dream as often as i should | ☾❥❈☼ | tba ↳ jeong jaehyun offers you a lucrative spot in his internationally accredited lab, what you didn’t know is that his research would bring in demons from his own past.

hwarang {prologue} | ☾❥☼ | historical au

the architect  | ☾☼ | 7.5k ↳ he’s something of an elusive creature to you and the handful of other people looking for him. kim jungwoo finds you, or maybe it’s the other way around, and there’s more to him than you originally thought.

pincushion | ☾❥❈☼| 20k ↳ a quiet life shaken up by a new face that appears in the tailor shop down the street. little did you know on your first meeting how lovely and bittersweet your love for him would become.

starcrossed | ☾☼ | 2.7k

↳ all gods have their fair share of lost loves. this is just kim jungwoo’s.

hwarang | ☾❥☼ | historical au ↳ act i   {60k} ↳ act ii {25k} ↳ act iii {15k} ↳ when your father goes missing, you look to an unlikely group of warriors to aid in your search for him. what you don’t mean to happen is uncover the truth about your life and meet a familiar face along the way.

per somnum | ☾ | 900  ↳ he’s not meant to care too much, but the call of your dreams resigns himself to become your savior of sorts.

hwarang {prologue} | ☾❥☼ | historical au

blinding | ☾❥❈☼ | paroxysm | mythology!au | 26.6k ↳ maybe he’s glad you could never remember his face. maybe it’s the cause of his melancholia. he’d watched you forget hundreds of times before, yet something about this version of you seems deadset on holding onto the past.

study break | ☼ | college!au | 600 ↳ a short conversation you have after a certain friend of yours bombs a midterm exam.

between the stars and earth | tba | arcane!au ↳ tba

hwarang {prologue} | ☾❥☼ | historical au

strawberry blond | ☼ | short story | 3.3k ↳ you never intended to feel this way about him, never intended to find yourself lost in a bittersweet nightmare when he tells you about a girl that’s caught his eye. a girl who was not you.

hwarang {prologue} | ☾❥☼ | historical au ↳  act i {71k} ↳ act ii {25k} ↳ when your father goes missing, you look to an unlikely group of warriors to aid in your search for him. what you don’t mean to happen is uncover the truth about your life and meet a familiar face along the way.

hwarang {prologue} | ☾❥☼ | historical au

[seokjinsdisciple]

It’s a Deal- five

supernatural! johnny x reader x jaehyun,  mate!au

Word Count: 1.2k

tags: @thatonekpopsweater, @yunception, @yourchasingsunsetslove, @a-brooding-bird

send me a dm or an ask to be on the taglist

warnings: language, supernatural stuff

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The next day you saw both Jaehyun and Johnny. And as much as it annoyed you, you had to give them some credit. Neither one had come up to you, allowing you to go about your business for the day while watching you like a hawk. You did have to say, you felt kind of relieved. All of the talk about attacks and protecting had you a little nervous about your well-being. As much as you hated to admit it, having two powerful fae nearby helped put your mind at ease. No matter how annoying they were. 

It was after your last class of the day that you couldn’t see either brother lurking around you. So, you headed to the library alone. It was supposed to be just a regular trip, you needed a book for one of your class projects, and typically it wouldn’t take you very long to find the book you were looking for. You used to work in the university library, so you knew your way around the stacks. Plus you had spent so many hours your freshman year finding the supernatural research books in your library. It’s not like they were very popular with other students. 

Today, however you were struggling. Like massively struggling. You had been searching the stacks up and down, again and again, still with no luck. You checked in your normal places, you checked the rare books collection, you checked online to see if it had been checked out, but no. You couldn’t find it. The book you needed for your project being much more elusive than you expected. Your fourth time down a row you thought it could be in had you running into a tall, handsome man. 

You could only take in parts of his appearance as you lost your balance. He was tall, and had a long face. His cheekbones were ridiculously high, and when his mouth turned into a slight frown you wanted to cry. Someone as beautiful as that shouldn’t ever be frowning, especially if it was because of you. 

“I’m so sorry,” he muttered out, dropping the book he was holding to try and catch you.

“Oh please, I was totally not paying attention,” you added, nervously smiling as you reached down to grab the fallen book. Of course it was the exact book you were looking for. 

You took one look at the lanyard around his neck and prayed to whatever gods existed that he was just filing this book back. 

“I was actually looking for that!” You giggled, handing him the book.

“Well I was just putting it back, did you need to check it out?” He smiled back, his face resembling that of an extremely attractive bunny. You thought you imagined the blush rise on his cheeks, because you had definitely not said that aloud. 

“Yeah, if you don’t mind?” you asked, breaking his gaze. You hadn’t realized how close you were to him until he told you to follow him. 

“My name is Dong-young,” he smiled at you as he made his way behind the counter, “I’m happy I helped you find your missing book!”

“Ah, yeah thanks for that by the way! I was starting to lose my mind.”

He just chuckled at that, scanning the book, “And who am I checking this out to?”

“YN, YN LN,” you smiled, not noticing the sparkle in his eye. 

“What a beautiful name,” he added, sliding the book over to you, “But I guess that’s only fitting for such a beautiful girl.”

“Uh-t-thank you,” you mumbled out, embarrassment spreading throughout your body. You hadn’t expected that compliment, plus you had already been flustered by his good looks. 

“I hope to see you around, YN,” Dong-young smiled. Giving a short wave as you stumbled out of the library and into the quad. 

You grinned all the way back to your apartment, closing your eyes and leaning your head against the door behind you. 

“What’s got you all happy?” Jaehyun spoke, the shocking revelation that you were not alone in your apartment causing your eyelids to shoot open. 

You let out a frustrated scream as you made eye contact with the two fae boys sitting on your couch.

“What are you DOING here?” You half shouted, tossing your bag to the ground and shuffling closer to them. 

“We’re making sure you don't get into any trouble, plus we wanted to apologize,” Johnny smiled, sending a glare towards his brother. 

“Yes we are very sorry, and we would like to cook you dinner.”

“Oh no no no, I’m not falling for that shit again. I will be cooking my own dinner, thanks so much for asking.”

“See! I told you she wasn’t going to trust that,” Johnny smirked at his brother. 

“But I bought all the ingredients!” Jaehyun pouted at you, sidling up behind you and resting his head on your shoulder, “I even used real people money.”

“Off.”

At this he whimpered, that pitiful sound enough to make you almost change your mind. 

“You never answered my question,” Johnny reminded you, pulling out a saucepan from your cabinets and starting with dinner. (You didn’t even want to know how he knew where your pots and pans were.)

“I didn’t realize it was any of your business,” you retorted back, working around him to start cutting the veggies Jaehyun had gotten, “and paws off. I’m cooking.”

“If  we do it together, no one is indebted to anyone and we all get to eat.”

“Fine. But you two leave as soon as dinner is done.”

They didn’t. In fact, you fell asleep that night watching old school horror movies with your head in Johnny’s lap and Jaehyun holding your hand. You hated to admit that spending time with them was actually...nice. Johnny being much funnier without the stress of school projects, and well Jaehyun being actually sweet. 

You drifted in a place between being asleep and being awake. The hushed whispers of the brothers holding your attention. 

“When are you going to tell her?” Jaehyun whispered, his thumb caressing your hand, which was still interlocked with his. 

“Well you kind of ruined that with you announcement of marriage, now didn’t you?”

“Oh brother,” Jaehyun let out a quiet chuckle, “You’re not going to put up a fight? But that’s no fun.”

“Oh, damn right I’ll be putting up a fight. I just need to deal with Doyoung first, and, in case you’d forgotten, brother, so do you.”

“Please, just once don’t remind me of my duties. You spent three years avoiding yours and playing human. Let me live a little.”

“I wasn’t playing human, and you know it. Let’s just drop this, it’s too dangerous to talk about it here.”

“Oh? You think your little one here would betray you?” Jaehyun asked, his tone playful, but also threatening. 

“No, I think any information she has about this war is dangerous. And I’d very much like her to live through it, brother.”

“Oh, how I know you desire that. Let’s find out just how much you’re willing to sacrifice for her, huh?”

And with that, Johnny placed his hand on your head, his fingers gently rubbing your scalp as you lulled back to sleep.

[thepixelelf]

Hood - Profiles Pt. 3

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Sangyeon: Working towards a master's in chemistry, Sangyeon is employed at Creker as a TA. He has unlimited access to the university lab facilities, which Sunwoo is very apt to mention. Sometimes Sangyeon offers tutoring as well, but his prices are more tailored to high school kids with rich parents than broke college students.

Younghoon: Another pre-med student and son of CKU's President Kim. Since his dad is rich and well-known, and Younghoon is naturally handsome, he's the face of Creker. His picture is on every website, every brochure. He also shares a few classes with you. Despite the fact that he's well-loved by most students and staff, you hate President Kim, so you keep your distance.

Jaehyun: A very friendly english major. Jaehyun plans on going into journalism, so he's also taking a few poli-sci courses. He also staffs CKU's english major discord, where first years and seniors alike go to cry about essays. Widely suspected to run the CKU gossip twitter.

Juyeon: Big handed, big hearted, Juyeon studies hard as a psychology major. He's a bit of a stress-head, but he manages to do really well in all of his classes. Along with friends Chanhee and Changmin, he's a fan of the elusive Hood.

Chanhee: A drama major with a personal vendetta against CKU — mostly for the gross disparity in treatment between fine arts and STEM. Despite being an actor, he spends most of his time with Changmin rather than people from his classes. Honestly, he just hates the drama major... drama. Desperately Secretly wants Hood to do something about the fine arts budget cuts.

Changmin: Enrolled in CKU's special technical theatre program, Changmin's education is the most at risk with cuts to the theatre department budget. His family is quite close with yours, but since you both went to different junior and high schools, you're not that close (though you do say hi to each other in passing). Rest assured that if there's an event on campus, Changmin is there setting it up.

•••

taglist: @grassywoozi @yslmingyux @distrikt9 @banhmi07 @diamondsvts @mayamochi @chaoticdeobi @moondustaeil @ph0ebevix @shoshishua @yveseulip @elcie-chxn

[i-stan-nct-and-satan]

Not Broken pt 13 (Jaehyun Mafia AU)

Not Broken Masterlist

Jaehyun X Reader

Y/N is a burlesque dancer living in Seoul. Jaehyun is one of the most powerful mafia men in Seoul. How will Y/N survive when Jaehyun suspects that she is involved with a rival gang?

Reasons to read this story: Ten’s a cross-dressing madam so….. yeah read it ya freaks.

Trigger warning: mentions of abuse

<><><><>Several hours before Y/N was called to Jaehyun’s office<><><><><>

“What’s so important to discuss that a member of the council decided to visit me personally?” Jaehyun asked in a disinterested tone as he poured two glasses of brandy for him and his guest, sealing the decanter once he had finished.

“A member of the council? I know that it’s best to keep an air of formality when in the presence of council members but given that it’s just the two of us, do call me Uncle, won’t you?” The older man requested, accepting the drink as it was handed to him.

Jaehyun moved to sit at his desk while Suho remained standing at the vintage drum table which the decanter rested on.  

“Why are you here?” He requested, setting his drink directly onto the cherrywood’s finish.

Suho’s eyes wandered around the room, feigning confusion towards his nephew’s inquiry.  

A soft sigh of frustration left the younger man’s lungs.

“Why are you here, Uncle?”  

A sly smile crept onto Suho’s face only for a contemplative expression to succeed it.  

The man began to swirl the amber liquid within its glass shell taking his time to notice how it coated the crystal walls for a fleeting instant before returning to a stagnant state.  

Jaehyun, whose patience usually would have been wearing thin at this point, allowed the man his thoughts as he began to observe his liquor as well.  

Suho was a member of Exo’s council, an alliance organization, of which Jaehyun’s father had also been a member. Exo could be characterized as a network of gangs or a grandfather gang, so to speak. It served as both an alliance and an enforcer, allowing associated organizations a considerable degree of protection against rival gangs. Several gangs in Seoul were affiliates of Exo, including NCT and all its current subgroups, Shinee, Super Junior, TVXQ, Red Velvet, BlackPink and many others. Although Exo was arguable the largest and most powerful gang alliance in Seoul, it wasn’t the only one. Got7 for instance, arguably NCT’s biggest rival gang was under the protection of JYP, an elusive organization that had begun growing exponentially over the past several years.

Although Exo’s membership technically extended to any and all members of its associated gangs, it’s only the Exo’s council members who hold any real power. Joining Exo forces leaders to relinquish many of their decision-making freedoms in exchange for protection, meaning that the council now had final say on important decisions involving their gangs.  

The council itself was made up of a select few individuals, each holding remarkable influence over the innerworkings of Seoul’s mob scene. Jaehyun was familiar with each of the council members for his father had been a member of the council since its creation, as had Suho.  

The two had been friends since they met in Juvie as teens, NCT was the fruit of that friendship. They started out preforming simple bank robberies, then quickly grew into a full-fledged gang eventually forming subdivisions meant to expand their territories. Sooman was NCT’s official leader and Suho was his right-hand man. They created Exo after forming an alliance with Super Junior and Shinee’s former leaders.

Not all council members were experienced crime lords. A handful of them were better described as investors, such as Sehun, who made billions investing in the drug trade. Becoming a member of the council was almost impossible, as members served lifetime appointments and a strict selective process was employed to take their places when they died. Those selected were never informed of their selection until after they were appointed to prevent any violence being committed against council members in the hopes of gaining a position.  

Jaehyun held great disdain for the process since every time a member died, he would be replaced by yet another old geezer who would continue to uphold the council’s outdated and traditional values.  

To Jaehyun, the council was nothing more than just another source of irritation. When his father died unexpectedly, the several members of the council opposed him, Jaehyun, from taking over his father’s position at such a young age despite SM and Suho having been even younger than he was when they formed NCT. Their official objections only ceased when Suho vowed to watch over the young man, although they continued to express their disapproval whenever the subject was brought up. Being the son of SM, one of the council’s original members gave Jaehyun a privilege that many of the other leaders did not have. He often got away with challenging the council with only a lecture for punishment whereas anyone else would risk forfeiting their gang’s Exo membership altogether.  

Jaehyun’s status didn’t spare him from any of the council’s scrutiny though, if anything, it was magnified.  

Out of all Exo’s affiliated gangs, NCT was the most powerful, meaning that if Jaehyun messed up in any way, the losses could be detrimental.  

Jaehyun had been called to face the council more than anyone else making him feel like their sole purpose was to piss him off. After the death of IU, the council began making what he viewed as unreasonable demands in order to protect NCT’s image.  

He had instructed Taeyong to send regular updates to the council regarding their captive and once Taeyong confirmed with them that not only had they proven Y/N irresponsible for IU’s death, but that she had actually killed the man who was, Jaehyun knew that it’d be a matter of time before he would be summoned once again. Jaehyun ignored the councils request to meet with them and thus Suho was sent as a representative in their absence.

“Are you sure that the girl is responsible for Lucas’s death?”  

Jaehyun returned his focus to the gentleman who had wandered over to one of the bookshelves. He used his free hand to graze the bindings of each of the collected works as if he were looking for something in particular.

“If you came only to confirm the information that was sent to you, then you’ve wasted a trip.”

Suho sighed, removing his hand from the bookshelf.

“I hope you’re aware of how this could make us look.”

Suho turned towards Jaehyun taking his time to meet him at his desk before sitting in the brown leather chair that mirrored his nephew’s.  

“Lucas having been killed by someone outside of NCT and all,” He finished, taking a sip from the crystal tumbler.

Jaehyun quirked an eyebrow.  

“What do you mean?”

Suho set his drink on a nearby coaster and proceeded to lift his leg, crossing his foot over his thigh, before leaning back in his chair.

“Think about it from a rival gang’s point of view. A year into his new position, a position given to him at what many considered too young of an age, the leader of NCT’s sister ends up being kidnapped and murdered by Wayv, a gang made up of former NCT members. Not only that, but three years later, NCT has still been unable find the man responsible,” He recounted, staring off into the room.

“That’s because he was dead this whole time. How the fuck were we supposed to know he was dead? You can’t find a guy who can’t be found,” Jaehyun reminded defensively.

“You of all people should know that image matters far more than truth. Remember how the council basically scrambled to protect NCT’s image? How we kept the truth about IU’s death under wraps so that to outsiders her death would have seemed like an accident? How none of us had even a second to mourn her loss as we were all too busy trying to do damage control?”  

Jaehyun didn’t respond.

“IU’s death was tragic. You know this, but you also realized the importance of minimizing its effect on NCT which is why as SM’s successor, you pushed through the pain to protect those of who were still alive, your members. We knew that presenting her death as an accident wouldn’t work long term, but the council hoped that it would buy you time while you searched for Wayv but now....”  

Suho’s eyes met Jaehyun’s as he stressed the seriousness of the situation.  

“Now that Wayv knows you have Lucas’s killer, they’re going to start forming connections, building alliances with other gangs, anything it takes to get to her. Word will get out that it was actually Wayv who were responsible for IU’s death and that the man who organized it wasn’t killed by NCT, but on accident by a mere burlesque dancer. NCT won’t just be seen as weak, it’ll become the laughingstock of Seoul.”  

“But, Uncle, Wayv must not want word getting out about Lucas’s death either. Why else would they have covered up his death and continued on as though he were still running everything?”

“That is true. It’s safe to say that before recent events, Wayv didn’t want the nature of their leader’s death reaching their rival gangs which is probably why they didn’t expose us when we buried the truth about IU’s death. They would have wanted to avoid suspicion at all costs. Even now, I’m sure that Wayv would prefer to keep this information to themselves especially after learning that Lucas was killed by someone with Y/N’s background.”

“So, what’s the problem?” Jaehyun asked, feeling uneasy about where his uncle was leading.

“The problem is that even if Wayv doesn’t want details regarding Lucas’s death reaching the public, their image won’t be hit as hard as NCT’s will, and it stands to reason that they’d be more than willing to cut off a few of their fingers if it meant NCT would lose its limbs.”

“What do you mean it would hit us harder? We’re not the ones whose leader was killed by a goddamn stripper!” Jaehyun boomed.  

“Yes, you’re right. He was killed and that’s exactly why they aren’t facing the same level of risk NCT is. Lucas was killed, making him Wayv’s former leader. He no longer represents them and thus whatever happened to him has very little effect on their image now. If anything, his death will actually strengthen Wayv’s image since after Lucas died, his successor somehow managed to keep his death a secret for almost three years. It takes a lot to hide something as big as the death of a prolific mob boss. If even one person were to squeal, the entire city would know within a matter of days and yet we’re only learning about it now, three years later. Wayv can only benefit from all this, You, on the other hand, will be seen as weak, incompetent, and a disgrace to your father’s legacy,” The older man explained.

“And that’s a shame because you’re not, Jaehyun. Your father would be proud to know how far you’ve come despite those whose doubt you,” He added.  

“That man never approved of anything I did when he was alive. I don’t know why he’d start in his death,” Jaehyun sneered.  

His face had fallen from its angered state, yet an air of bitterness seemed to linger in his features. Suho could only sigh at his nephew’s hardheadedness which had surely been passed down to him by his father.

“The council wants to replace you.”

“Oh yeah? And how do they plan on going through with those plans?” Jaehyun scoffed.

Suho gave his nephew a softhearted look.

“They don’t. You and I both know how capable the council is when forcing their agenda regardless of the leaders who oppose them, but I convinced them to hold off on their plans just until you’ve had a chance to resolve the issue on your own.”

Jaehyun leaned back in his chair as he pondered his uncle’s remarks. It was true that the council was more than capable of replacing him as leader even if his men continued being loyal to him. Exo wouldn’t just threaten to withdraw their protections over NCT, they would find a way to completely dismantle NCT, rebuilding it in their ideal image. Exo had more than enough funds to obtain whatever resources needed to preserve control of their affiliates. The only thing he could do, was roll over and hope they wouldn’t tighten his leash any further. He had to act.

“What should I do?” Jaehyun asked, finally letting his guard down.

“You need to get on top of this. Find a way to ease the council’s anxieties.”  

“And how exactly do you suppose I do that?”

Suho lifted his drink from its coaster, bringing it to his lips and finishing it in two large sips. He returned the glass to the desk, causing it to make a soft thumping sound as it contacted the wood.

“Have you thought about the council’s suggestion from before all this began, about taking a wife?”

“Oh, not this again,” Jaehyun groaned.

“Look, the council is worried. They don’t think you hold the same values your father did. To them, you’re a firecracker just waiting to go off. It makes them antsy. Marriage will show the council that you hold traditional values and are not the irresponsible rebel they think you are.”

“Marriage will do all that?” Jaehyun laughed, obviously not taking his uncles advice seriously.

“You were so insistent on being able to choose your own wife and rejected any thoughts of allowing the council to make any arrangements for you, which pissed off a lot of people. Taking one of the councilmen’s daughters or nieces as a wife would have shown commitment to your role as SM’s successor. Your refusal shows a lack of respect and makes them question how much power they should allow you when you continue to make them feel uneasy about the future. Your parent’s marriage was arranged. It really isn’t that big of a deal. Have you at least started considering any possible applicants?”

“I haven’t exactly had any time to mingle given how I’ve been busy trying to find the men responsible for my sister’s death and all.” Jaehyun reminded his uncle in a tone drenched with sarcasm.  

“Hmmm, well I guess that’s probably a good thing considering the circumstances,” Suho mused quietly.

“Excuse me?” Jaehyun leaned forward so that his forearms rested on the desk.  

Suho returned his focus to his nephew whose curious features urged him to go on.  

“The girl, take her as your wife.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Jaehyun gawked, unable to believe what his uncle was saying.

“Marry her. That’s the only way you can turn this around. If word gets out that NCT’s leader got married to the girl responsible for Lucas’ death, they’ll assume that his death wasn’t actually an accident but was all a part of your plan. Even if people don’t come to that conclusion, which I don’t see why they wouldn’t, marrying her will prevent all of the damage that she’d cause us if you let her go. How I see it, you have two options. You could let her go get captured by Wayv, which you do not want, and let everyone view NCT as weak for not being able to kill the man who murdered their leader’s sister, which you definitely don’t want, or you can marry the girl and kill three birds with one stone. She’ll be safe from Wayv, NCT’s image will be as strong as ever, and the council will view you as a trustworthy leader who shares their same values.”

Jaehyun scoffed in amazement, unsure of what he could possibly say to respond to such an outrageous proposal.  

Were these just the crazy ramblings of a man entering the stages of early onset dementia or was his uncle actually onto something?

“I mean, it’s not a bad deal. She is a very attractive young woman. I’m not sure you could do much better, even if you were to marry one of the councilman’s daughters,” Suho smirked.

Jaehyun glanced at his half empty glass, reaching towards it to take a sip.  

His uncle was right. Despite the bitter taste that the idea of marrying a burlesque dancer left in his mouth, she was more beautiful than any of the councilmen’s daughters. He couldn’t brush off the fact that marriage could very well be enough to stop them from interfering in his business as much as they did. Although the council members would probably prefer it if he didn’t marry a foreigner, perhaps marrying an American would grant him a bit of status. When he thought about the possibility of marriage before, he believed that he would be happy as long as the girl was beautiful and didn’t speak up too much or challenge him. That’d be the perfect arrangement, yet he didn’t see Y/N as the obedient type.

“Ok, wait a second. Suppose I were to commit to such a plan, how would I get her to accept my proposal? We didn’t exactly get off to a great start, so I doubt she’d agree,” Jaehyun asked, beginning to entertain the idea.  

“Present it as though she doesn’t have a choice,” He advised.  

Jaehyun shifted his weight off the desk and leaned back against his chair, taking a moment to process the suggestion.

“Even if I didn’t give her a choice, I’m sure she’d find ways to be as bothersome as she could. Dealing with her rebellious moods might be more trouble than it’s worth.”

“Well, finding a way to ensure her compliance shouldn’t be too hard, should it?” Suho hinted with a smile.

The younger man hummed, as he contemplated what his next actions might require.  

“No, it should not.”

<><><><><>

“Does everyone understand?”  

The members of NCT 127 stared at their boss, astonished by the sudden announcement. None of them knew what to say so many of them merely nodded, pretending as though they understood the situation.  

After Suho left, Jaehyun called Taeyong into his office to inform him of his intentions to marry Y/N. Taeyong was understandably shocked by his boss’s unsettling plans. To him, it didn’t make any sense to marry a girl who was rightfully terrified of him even if it was in the best interest for NCT. He tried to talk him out of it knowing full well that Jaehyun doesn’t just get talked out of things. After Jaehyun revealed that there were discussions of replacing him among the council and that Suho, himself, recommended the marriage, Taeyong conceded to his boss’s orders and called a meeting in the billiards room.  

“You are all dismissed then. Except for you two,” Jaehyun motioned towards two of his men before turning to Taeyong.

“Bring Y/N to my office when she is done eating. I need to have a discussion with these two first,” Jaehyun instructed his right-hand man.  

<><><><><>

“Have a seat.”

Winwin and Johnny sat in the chairs that were placed directly across from their boss.  

Jaehyun took his time studying his raven-haired colleague whilst almost completely overlooking the gentleman who sat beside him.  

“What do you think about what was discussed at the meeting, Winwin?” Jaehyun asked, taking care to analyze his reaction.

Winwin, who had been glaring at this boss up to this point, let out a dry laugh and shook his head to show his irritation.

“What are you trying to do here?” He demanded.

Jaehyun laughed in amusement.  

“What do you mean? I just asked for your thoughts.”

Winwin rolled his eyes.

“Listen, I couldn’t care less what you do with the girl. It’s just business, right? Or did you think I’d be against it since marrying her is all a part of your ploy to win against Wayv?”  

All traces of amusement were now gone from the Jaehyun’s face as he turned to Johnny.

“You’ve been keeping an eye on him all this time, right? Nothing suspicious?”

The man nodded in response.

“What about when you two were separated?”

“The only time we weren’t together was when one of us was using the bathroom, but like you instructed, I searched him for  any electronic devices before he entered the bathroom and had Taeil watch over him when I wasn’t able to.”

Jaehyun leaned back in his chair, staring behind the two men. He still didn’t trust Winwin but he couldn’t keep him on watch without there being any new evidence against him. Doing so would lead the others to believe he was making decisions based on his emotions instead of what he thought was best for NCT.  

His thoughts were interrupted when a soft knock came from the other side of his office door.

“Johnny, you will no longer be required to watch over Winwin. Winwin, you are free to interact with whomever you feel inclined, but I will be keeping my eye on you. You are both free to go.”

He watched as the two men exited out the door, catching a glimpse of them stopping to greet whom he presumed to be Taeyong and the girl.

After taking a moment to mentally prepare himself for what was about to come, he called out to them.

“You may enter now.”

Y/N was the first to enter while Taeyong held the door open for her. Jaehyun took note of what she was wearing, faded black jeans and an off-white shirt. It made him wonder why she wanted to wear something of such a low quality, when she could have worn what was prepared for her, but then he remembered what Jaemin had said about her not wanting anything he had to offer her.

Y/N made no effort to hide her avoidance of his gaze. Once she sat down in the chair Winwin had previously been seated in, Jaehyun dismissed Taeyong.  

It was just the two of them now.  

He silently stared at her frightened figure which seemed to shrink further and further into the brown leather chair. He noticed her bruises. They had almost completely vanished from her face and only small patches of discoloration remained.  

He hadn’t forgotten how beautiful she was the night of the performance, though he couldn’t help but observe how much more ethereal she looked than that night before everything went down. Sure, her wounds hadn’t completely healed, and her appearance revealed a tinge of dishevelment, but her flashy costume and makeup from the night of her performance only seemed to distract from her natural visage.  

“Y/N?”  

She looked up at him, finally allowing their eyes to meet and for a split second, Jaehyun forgot why he had called her into his office in the first place. It was only after he noticed her shaky breaths that he was reminded of what he was to say.  

“It has been decided that you and I will get married this month.”

<><><><><>

I was the type of person whose mind went blank whenever she heard something she didn’t want to believe was true. I felt as though I could turn any unwanted reality into a dream I could wake up from as long as I didn’t think about it, or anything else for that matter. If I allowed myself to process the situation, it would be like thinking it into existence. I didn’t know why this was my first instinct. It never changed anything. It only allowed for me to live in denial a moment longer. That was how I reacted to my parent’s death, and to my brother’s betrayal, but those weren’t dreams or even nightmares. I had to accept them for what they truly were. My reality.

Even now, I wanted nothing more than to fall back into that familiar state of disassociation. If there was ever a time to mistake my reality for a delusion conjured up by my unconscious mind, this was it. It was all so bizarre; too preposterous to be real. My rationality was evaporating, and my vision blurring.  

I bit down on the inside of my cheeks, determined to find some sort of grounding. I focused on the metallic flavor that began to coat my tongue. I continued to stare at the man that had found yet another way to afflict me, this time with words instead of fists. I wanted so desperately to snap out of it, yet I didn’t know how. I could feel myself falling deeper and deeper into nihility when a memory of the Madam entered my mind.  

“Those who believe that heaven and hell are opposites of each other are cursed to only experience one at a time. They say you gotta go through hell to get out of it but why not learn to love the heat?”

That was her go-to toast when having drinks with the performers. Why I had thought of that speech, I didn’t know. Maybe my mind was just trying to find a memory to latch onto hoping it would stop me from falling into oblivion. I used the memory as a chance to break my gaze from his. My eyes moved to see the glass of brandy that rested on the desk near his hands.  

I instinctively reached out toward the glass earning a wide-eyed stare from its owner. Without thinking I dipped my fingers inside the glass and scooped out the ice cube that was floating just below the amber liquid’s surface. The ice cube dropped to the floor and I bought the glass to my lips, quickly draining it of its contents. The familiar burn that traveled down my throat managed to return my soul to my body. From how many gulps it took to finish, it must have been a double, not nearly enough to get me drunk, but hopefully enough for the liquid courage to do its job once the adrenaline started to fade.  

I slammed the empty glass down on the desk and stared into the eyes of my captor.

“What the fuck did you just say?”

<><><><>

Jaehyun’s shocked expression disappeared and he began to laugh.  

“That’s what I get for not offering you a drink, I presume.”

My gaze became venomous, calling attention to the severity of the situation.  

Jaehyun noticed this and returned to his humorless disposition.

“You and I will be married this month,” He repeated.  

“You must have lost your mind. You and I? Married?” I scoffed.

“As the leader of NCT, I am required to take a wife for reasons of status. It has been decided that you will be that wife.”

“So? I’m sure there are tons of other women you could marry, why me?” I demanded.

“It has come to my attention that your involvement in Lucas’s death poses a threat to our organization’s image. Seeing as how you were the one to kill him and not one of my men, it’s likely that this could send a serious blow to us. That is, if it gets out that the man responsible for my sister’s death was killed by a mere... dancer,” He divulged, a speck of distaste coated his voice as he uttered the last two syllables.

“You’re crazy. You’re telling me you wanna marry me? How did you find the nerve? And while I still have bruises and a cracked rib that you gave me,” I spat.

I was seething in anger.

“This isn’t a matter of what I want or don’t want. This marriage, along with the wedding itself, will only be for the sake of appearances. If it were my choice, you wouldn’t even be here, but now that Wayv wants you, it’s in my best interest to keep you here, no matter what it takes.”

“You said I was free to leave whenever I wanted!”  

“Well I guess I changed my mind,” He declared using a dismissive tone.

“No, I won’t. I won’t do it.” I stood up, hands gripping the edge of the desk.  

“You don’t really have a choice now do you, Kitten?”

“This is insane. What on earth makes you think that I would willingly marry you? If you’re really just doing this for appearances, then... then I’ll do everything I can to show everyone just how unwilling I am. I’ll act out. I’ll... I’ll-”

“You will do nothing of the sort.” Jaehyun bellowed in a voice, almost intimidating enough to scare me into backing down... almost.

“What are you going to do, kill me?” I challenged.

Jaehyun stood up, allowing his oppressive height to add to his threatening demeanor.  

“You will do as I say whether that is going through with the wedding or anything else for that matter. You will behave from now on because if you don’t, it’s your friend who will pay the price.”

Extinguished by his menacing implication, the fire that ran through my veins was nowhere to be found.  

“W-what are-”

“Remember how you asked me to check on your friend from the other night? Wendy, was it? Well I had my men check the local hospital’s records from that night. It turns out that they treated three patients from the burlesque club the night of your performance and that included your friend. Somehow, she sustained the worst injury of all having received a bullet to the chest. Luckily for her, the bullet missed her heart and was easily removed through the surgery I paid for. She was released from the hospital yesterday.”

“Wendy’s alive?”  

I fell back into the chair, unable to believe how I had forgotten all about my friend these past few days. With everything that had been going on, I hadn’t thought of her since I made the request in the first place.

“She’s alive and will likely go on to live a full and meaningful life especially after having been granted 20 million won to study at the university of her choice... as long as you do what I say.”

I did my best to fight back the tears that were already beginning to stream down my face completely unaware that Jaehyun’s anger had turned into discomfort.

I gave up trying to hold back my tears and brought my hands to my face. After sensing a nearby presence, I removed them to see that Jaehyun had also returned to a sitting position and was offering me a royal blue handkerchief. I stared at him, confused by the gesture.  

“I didn’t want for things to turn out this way either. I understand why you’re upset and I’m sorry for everything that’s happened to you because of me. Think of our marriage as an arrangement. Being my wife will offer you a degree of status and wealth, not to mention protection from Wayv. You’ll have to act as my wife at social events, but besides that, you’ll be free to do as you wish without any disruptions from me.” He explained looking away.

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?! I’d rather you keep me locked up in that room for the rest of my life than spend one minute married to you!” I shouted, ignoring the handkerchief.

The neatly folded handkerchief was now wrinkled by the harsh grip that held it. The anger had returned to his face.

“Fine! If that’s how you’re going to be then who am I to deny you your wishes? Stay in your room and rot for all I care,” He roared.  

Taeyong quickly entered the room.

“Get her out of my sight and don’t let her out of her room until I say so,” He ordered, abruptly standing up from his desk and knocking over several items in the process.  

Taeyong escorted me back to my room. The only time he said anything was to tell me that he’d try to calm Jaehyun down and that I should probably stay in my room until he’d given me the go ahead.  

I spent the remainder of the night crying. Crying for Wendy, all the things she went through because of me and for the others who got hurt that night. I mostly cried for myself though. My worst nightmare had come true. I was going to have to marry Jung Jaehyun, the leader of Seoul’s most notorious gang, NCT.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

I woke up to the sun shining through my window, something I wasn’t used to, given my early morning training sessions.

It still seemed pretty early though.

I rolled over to look at the clock but saw a note on the vanity table along with a glass of water instead.  

I grabbed the water first, glad to have something to drink as my head was pounding.  

I picked up and read the note while sitting up against the bedframe.  

Y/N,

I talked to Jaehyun. He is sorry and you are free to move around the building unescorted. I asked Jeno to allow you the morning off from training.  

-Taeyong

Memories of the day before came flooding back all at once. It really did feel like I was hungover, but not from drinking too much.

I had no idea how Taeyong managed to get Jaehyun to ease up on me, although he must have since I was now able to leave. I doubted that Jaehyun was actually sorry though. Taeyong probably added that in just to give me some sort of relief.  

I heard noises in the hallway. It was a loud rustling noise. I got up from the bed to investigate. Creaking the door open slightly, I noticed that I really was unguarded. I peeked into the halls seeing nothing but closed doors.  

My curiosity got the better of me causing me to follow the noise until I was standing in front of a closed door. I could hear two people talking, but not very clearly. It sounded like they were having an argument.  

I pressed my ear to the door.  

“I just don’t get why it’s such a big deal. It’s not like we can act all lovey-dovey around the other members anyways,” Said one of voices.  

“That’s not the problem. The problem is that you can’t even tell them we’re dating. It’s like you are ashamed of me or something,” The other voiced whined.

My eyes widened in shock. Was this Jeno and Jaemin on the other side?

I focused on the voices. They both sounded familiar, but I couldn’t place who they belonged to. Luckily, I didn’t have to.

“Mark, I’m serious. If you can’t open up about us to your friends, then we can’t do this anymore.”

Mark?

If that’s Mark, then who’s-

The door opened causing me to stumble back and fall on the floor.

“Haechan, wait!”  

I looked up to see who had unintentionally knocked me over but was met with someone I would have never guessed.

“Donghyuck?”

“Y/N?”

“Haechan, what’s-” Mark came out from behind him before looking down at me.

“Y/N?”

I looked up at Donghyuck.

“Haechan? Wait but you’re Donghyuck.”

“Donghyuck?” Mark quirked.  

Haechan facepalmed.  

“What the fuck is going on?” I demanded.  

Mark looked at me, then back at Donghyuck then down at his hands that seemed to be working him through some sort of calculation.  

“If you know Y/N, and she recognized you but called you Donghyuck instead of Haechan, then... oh.”

<><><><><><><><><><><>

After our run-in upstairs, Donghyuck and Mark told me to wait outside their room while they called Taeyong. He had arrived shortly after and was ushered into the room with them. I stood there outside the room silently. I didn’t even try to eavesdrop for I was worried I wouldn't like what they were saying. As soon as the door opened, Donghyuck practically lunged at me, grabbing my shoulders so I would face him.  

“Holy fuck, Y/N. What kind of trouble did you get yourself into?” he exclaimed before pulling me into his embrace.

The three of them brought me down to the kitchen where we ran into Jeno, Jaemin, Yuta, and Doyoung, who all seemed to be getting ready for breakfast. Taeyong sat me at the table with Mark and asked everyone else in the kitchen to step out for a moment so he could talk to them. I tried asking Mark what was going on and why Donghyuck was here and why he was calling him Haechan but he only told me that I would find out soon enough. After what was most definitely more than just a moment, everyone returned to the kitchen except Taeyong and Donghyuck. When I asked where they were, Yuta simply responded with, “They need to talk to the boss.”

Jaemin and Jeno tried to lighten up the mood but to no avail. Jeno asked me how I was enjoying my day off from training while Jaemin set the table up for breakfast. Nobody spoke a word about the Haechan/Donghyuck situation or even mentioned the other elephant in the room. To be honest, I didn’t know whether to be grateful for not having to discuss the details regarding my recent engagement, or if it merely added to my anxieties.

The two of them finally returned after we had been eating, or more like absentmindedly playing with our breakfast, for over 20 minutes.  

As they sat down at the table, I noticed that Donghyuck’s eyes were glued to me. He looked pained, like a boy watching his pet cat run into a busy highway, knowing he couldn’t do anything to help the poor creature.

“Jaehyun is busy right now but he’s been filled in and has given me instructions on how to handle the matter,” Taeyong began.  

I felt myself relax a little after hearing Taeyong’s words. I felt relief knowing that I wouldn’t have to deal with seeing Jaehyun on top of everything else that was going on.

“It’s come to my attention that you and Hae-” Taeyong hesitated, not exactly knowing how to explain what he was trying to explain.  

“that you and Haechan, or Donghyuck as you know him as, are already well acquainted with each other.”

Taeyong paused waiting for my reaction but given that I was too confused to even know where to start, I stayed quiet.

“Maybe I should just let Haechan do the talking. He’s been caught up on your situation, so he can catch you up on his.”  

Everyone at the table turned to Donghyuck while he continued to stare back at me.  

A soft sigh left Donghyuck’s mouth as he broke my gaze to look down at the table.  

“Y/N, I’m a member of-”

“You’re a member of NCT?!” I blurted out.  

A small smile crept onto his face and a forced version of his laughter entered my ears.

“Surprise?”  

Everyone at the table stared at each other. It was agonizingly uncomfortable.

“I need a shot. Does anybody else need a shot?” Haechan awkwardly got up and walked over to the main part of the kitchen.

“Haechan, it’s 9:20. Nobody needs a sho-” Taeyong began.

“I would like a shot,” I announced, hand suddenly raised above my head.

“Thatta girl. Glad to see this place didn’t snuff out your party girl spirit. Jeno, where do you keep the booze in this place?”  

Haechan began opening the cabinet drawers as he continued his search for anything that would make the situation less uncomfortable than it was.

“There’s a bottle of cooking merlot in the upper left-hand cabinet above the main oven,” Jeno offered.

Haechan opened the cabinet and pulled the bottle out.  

“It’s not quite what I was hoping for, but I supposed it’ll do the trick.”

Haechan hurried to open the bottle, almost knocking it over in the process. Once the corked was freed from its enclosure, Haechan swiftly wrapped his lips around the bottle’s opening and started chugging. He held the bottle in its now tilted position for ten solid seconds before lowering it back onto the counter.

“That should do it,” He muttered, out of breath before grabbing the bottle by its neck and bringing it over to the table. As he handed me the bottle, I couldn’t help but notice that a measurable amount of the red liquid had disappeared from the bottle, not that it mattered. There was still more than enough wine left to get me through the next few hours.

I began to chug the liquid in the same manner that Haechan had, unaware of the impressed and/or concerned faces that surrounded me.  

The bottle couldn’t have been more than halfway full by the time I set it down. I wiped my mouth with the sleeve of my shirt, unbothered by the risk of possibly staining it.  

“You,” I panted, pointing to Donghyuck,

“Tell me what the fuck is going on.”

Donghyuck, or I guess Haechan, did his best to fill me in on... well everything.  

The 127 member that Mark had told me about, was actually Donghyuck all along. He was working undercover as my apartment’s doorman, in order to get information on a former NCT member named Hansol, which is why he went by Donghyuck instead of his real name. Hansol had disappeared without a trace several years ago and 127 had been trying to find him ever since. One of NCT’s sources claimed that they had sighted Hansol entering my apartment complex with one of the building’s residents, a gang leader who usually went under the alias, Feeldog but was registered with the building as Kwang-suk. Apparently, it was rumored that Hansol left NCT to join Feeldog’s gang, UNB, a rumor that Yuta apparently took great issue with.  

“There’s no way. He wouldn’t do that. Not without telling someone at least,” He maintained.

Haechan and Taeyong glanced at each other.  

“What?!” Yuta snapped.

Taeyong sighed.

“It’s just that you and Hansol were so close, it makes sense that you would have feelings of betrayal surrounding his disappearance.”

“So what? You think I’m blinded by our friendship or some shit? That I can’t think clearly? Hansol disappeared and we failed him by not finding him. Who knows what could UNB could have done to him? He could be dead for all we know!”  

Yuta was so riled up that he had to excuse himself from the table. Doyoung, who had remained silent this entire time, left with him.

“He gets like this anytime someone brings him up,” Mark sighed.

“There hadn’t been any sightings of Hansol since or even before the one at your building. That’s why when we got the tip, we decided to send in someone to go undercover,” Taeyong revealed before Haechan chimed in.

“Jaehyun obviously couldn’t send any of the members on an undercover mission since Hansol would have immediately recognized them. Mark and I were the only two members who hadn’t joined 127 until after Hansol disappeared so it had to be one of us. Since Mark was being trained to eventually take over NCT Dream, the Canadian unit, I was the obvious candidate. After that, we needed to figure out how I was going to be able to constantly surveil the building without being suspicious.”

“As a doorman?” I interjected.

“Exactly! It isn’t abnormal for a doorman to take an interest in their building’s residents. They see everyone who comes in or out of the building. They know everyone’s names and everyone’s business. They’re always there so you never think twice when you see them around the building.”

I let out a scoff which prompted Haechan to furrow his brows.

“What?” He asked.  

“So, all this time, you were just pretending to be my friend so that you could blend in?”  

My accusation was immediately purged of all seriousness when a snort escaped from Haechan as he began to cackle.

“Pretend to be friends with you?! To blend in?! Y/N, I did everything in my power to avoid you!”

Now it was my turn to furrow my brows.

“The first twenty times you saw me you were either hungover or drunk. Either way, you found a way to make a scene, calling me Dongfuck, asking me why I was so serious and telling me to loosen up a bit. I was so worried that you would blow my cover that when I saw Feeldog coming down the halls, I agreed to go drinking with you just to get you to leave before he got close.“

I could feel my cheeks start to burn up. Taeyong started to chuckle, only attempting to recompose himself after noticing my glare. I remembered what he was talking about. After what happened with Lucas, I found the Heartbreakers and was able to make enough money to afford rent in a bougie apartment building. But to say that I was in a better place would have been far from the truth. I was an absolute a mess. The only time I was sober was when I had just woken up and sometimes not even then.  

“I knew if I stood you up that you’d only make an even bigger ruckus the next time you saw me, so I decided to just say ‘fuck it’ and go party with you. I didn’t expect to have as much fun as I did.”

I looked up at Haechan and was surprised to see nothing but sincerity in his eyes.

“Okay, but what about you and Mark?” Is he the guy you had told me about?”  

All traces of peacefulness had disappeared from Haechan’s eyes which looked as though they were about to pop out of their sockets. I felt an elbow dig into my side though when I turned to scold its owner, I saw that Mark was shaking his head at me with a look so serious and grave that I could barely believe it had actually come from Mark, himself.  

I shot a look back at Taeyong who seemed more confused than anything, before taking notice of Jeno and Jaemin who both sent each other a casual smirk. I had totally forgotten that they were arguing about the secrecy of their relationship before I unintentionally intervened.

“I just meant... the guy you told me about, the one who loved watermelon more than anything? That was Mark, right?”

Both Haechan and I looked at Taeyong, who was chuckling under his breath.  

“He really does love watermelon, doesn’t he?” He laughed.

Haechan’s eyes returned to their usual state after realizing that Taeyong was still as clueless as ever.

Once I had been caught up on everything, Taeyong excused himself, allowing the table’s remaining occupants to discuss more personal matters.  

“Yes, Mark is the boyfriend I told you about. The one who can’t even man up and tell his coworkers that he’s bi and has a boyfriend.”  

“Wait, what?” Mark quirked, having returned to his default state of confusion.

“Oh, forget it,” Haechan sighed.

<><><><><><><><>

I woke up the next morning to the sound of the alarm clock Taeyong had given me the previous evening. I was glad to have some way of waking myself up in the morning so that Jeno wouldn’t have be the one to do it. I always felt bad for him since not only did he usually have to wake me up, he had to wait for me to get ready too. This way, I could wake myself up and be ready to meet Jeno in the training room before 6:00.  

Before coming here, I was never able to get myself out of bed this early, usually due to being hungover, but I really didn’t want to keep Jeno waiting, especially since he was doing me a favor by becoming my trainer.  

I got out of bed, still sluggish with sleep, and proceeded to put on my workout clothes. I brushed my hair out of my face, pulled it back into a ponytail and headed out the bedroom door.  

Since I was allowed to sleep in the day before, waking up at 5:30 was harder than usual. Just when I was starting to get used to the crazy schedule, Taeyong had to mess it up by telling Jeno to let me sleep in. My eyes could barely stay open as I wandered through the empty halls. I lightly slapped my cheeks with my hands in an attempt to shake away my drowsiness.  

I hoped that Jeno’s training voice would be enough to snap me out of my dazed state, so I immediately entered the training room when I arrived at its door.  

“Goodmorning, Jeno,“ I greeted as I tried to rub the sleep from my eyes.

“Goodmorning, Y/N.”

My breathing hitched and my lazy steps came to an immediate halt.  

All fatigue left my body along with any last traces of serenity I was feeling only moments prior.  

My hands carefully removed themselves from my eyes and dropped to my sides. 

“What are you doing here?”

[meow-bebe]

Elusive

The First installment of my Neo Classics collection, ‘Elusive’ is set in F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby.

“Ten Lee throws the most extravagant parties in New York, though he rarely seems to be in attendance himself. When you find yourself in his mansion one warm June evening, you aim to find the elusive Ten Lee and get a bit more than you bargained for.”

Paring: Ten Lee x reader, Jung Jaehyun x reader

Genre: Roaring 20s au, Jazz Age au, The Great Gatsby au

Warnings: quite a bit of alcohol, general debauchery, mentions of adultery, mentions of smoking, this one gets a bit suggestive (heavy make out session, removal of outer layers)

Word count: 6.4k

Tonight’s soundtrack: Booty Swing - Parov Stelar, It Ain’t Over - Monsta X, Catgroove - Parov Stelar, Miss Jackson - Panic! at the Disco, Love Talk - WayV, Nicotine - Panic! at the Dicso

A/n: hiya! before you read, i’d just like to say that this fic is my pride and joy. Its my child. It took me over a month to plan out and write, is the longest thing ive ever written, and im very very proud of it. so please, if you enjoyed elusive give it a reblog! send me an ask! just scream in the tags, but let me know you enjoyed it! ill appreciate it more than you can ever know, and it will definitely help to give me motivation to keep working on the next parts of neo classics. 

“The bar is in full swing, and floating rounds of cocktails permeate the garden outside, until the air is alive with chatter and laughter, and casual innuendo and introductions forgotten on the spot, and enthusiastic meetings between women who never knew each other’s names.” - F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

In all of New York, fanciful, expensive, outrageous New York, there was one man known far and wide for his parties. Those in attendance always returned touting fabulous stories of more liquor than an army could drink in a week, of the celebrities that shamelessly showed their faces, and of the cover that night and perhaps hundreds of people could offer to those wanting to make a fool of themselves or sneak off with a mistress. It couldn't be denied that they were possibly the best parties in the whole state. 

And the man behind it all? The elusive Ten Lee. 

Ten was an enigma, a figure shrouded in mystery despite opening his property to all those who fancied a wild night most weekends. Very little was known about him to the general public. Even many of those in his own social circle knew little to nothing about the man. Supposedly he had inherited most of his fortune, and having only begun taking up residence in New York in the past year or so there was quite a bit of speculation that he was foreign. Despite being the topic of many a gossip column, Ten wasn’t exactly a public figure, and it seemed that this absolute lack of information about him bled into the atmosphere of his extravaganzas as well. Many of his regular partygoers never bothered to question his presence, or lack thereof. Ten had always interested you, and upon your invitation to one of his grand functions, you had decided that this was the night you would meet the little known Mr. Lee. 

Not that you were truly invited, but not many people were. Most just came anyway, saying they knew someone who was involved with Ten, or they had known him before he claimed his inheritance and became the Mr. Lee that all high class New Yorkers knew of. (Or was there a time before? Perhaps he had started out just as anyone else and his sudden acclamation of a large sum of money led him to spend on the most frivolous of things. Or maybe the man had arrived from his mother’s womb as the classy and expensive bachelor he was known as. No one seemed to know.) No matter what their story was, each attendee often brought along several plus ones. Automobiles would bear them out to Long Island, and they would flood onto the lawn, ready to dance and drink and make good use of all the expensive treats Ten provided. 

It was through a friend that you found yourself being driven out to the island one evening in late June. This was not your first Lee party, and it would not be your last, however you, unlike many of the other guests, held on to some shred of dignity and only showed up when invited. Even if you were only brought along because Irene didn’t want to be seen alone, it was something. Not that she ever kept to herself for long. 

Irene, a close friend of many years, was a self proclaimed rising starlet, although in reality she had been a very minor character in two films. She could be a bit dramatic at times (as her “profession” called for), and her title as “actress” was certainly an exaggeration. Still, she was a dear friend to you no matter how much she liked to stroke her own ego. And using her small claim to fame, Irene had managed to worm her way into the heart and car of a man who was also trying to make his way in the film business. You suspected he was about as in the public eye as Irene. Nevertheless, he had managed to get an invitation through one of his higher-ups and invited Irene to accompany him, which of course meant you would be tagging along as well. And truly, it wasn’t as if you minded. You enjoyed a night out as much as the next person, and Irene was your ticket into many affairs you wouldn’t otherwise find yourself attending. 

There were a few others driving out with you, all chattering amongst themselves and buzzing with excitement for the coming night. Irene, placed strategically in the front seat,  appeared to have latched onto the driver as her catch of the night. This was expected, after all he had been the one to invite her. You didn’t fool yourself into thinking she would stay by your side for very long anyway, Irene was notorious for ditching you as soon as a particularly good looking man showed up. You were fine on your own, and didn’t usually mind being left to your own devices. Depending on where you were you often got the urge to explore, after all the rich lead different lives, and getting a glimpse of that was always a good time. Irene often encouraged you to find someone of your own to pass the time with, and while sometimes you would find someone who could hold a half decent conversation, it was never very high on the night’s agenda. Though it seems tonight, in a rare break from your usual habit of flying solo, you had found someone. An attractive young man who had been introduced to you as Mr. Jung was seated at your side, and had begun talking quietly with you as the automobile sped along towards the island. 

“You look quite dashing tonight, Miss一?”

His voice was deep and soft, gentle and just a tad bit sultry.

“Y/l/n. Y/n Y/l/n,” you fill in.

“Miss Y/n Y/l/n,” Mr. Jung muses, and though you’ve heard them many times before the familiar words feel different when he says them like that, perfectly proper in his every action  except for the slight seductive tone slipping through his barriers. A pleasant shiver runs down your spine as he takes your hand and presses a chaste kiss to your gloved fingers, the black of the silk making a nice contrast with his pretty pink lips. “A beautiful name, though not as beautiful as the one who holds it.”

You giggle, raising the hand not grasped in his to cover your mouth, and reply, “Oh Mr. Jung, how you flatter me.”

“Please,” he lets your fingers slip out of his, “just call me Jaehyun.” 

Well, perhaps not entirely proper, but there was no denying that you were enjoying the attention he was laying on you. Finding Ten Lee might be the final goal of tonight but he could be notoriously hard to find, and even if you did have ulterior motives there was no reason you shouldn't enjoy yourself in the meantime. Jaehyun had been nothing but gracious and flattering, and it never hurt to have a gorgeous man’s arm to cling to. You chat idly with Jaehyun for the rest of the ride out to Ten’s mansion, words flowing freely between you the whole time yet each learning not a single note worthy detail about the other. 

By the time you arrive, just before dusk is preparing to settle herself over the bay, the party is already in full swing. Though the real festivities begin once night falls, many guests arrive in the afternoon, early enough to enjoy the section of the beach that falls on Ten’s property. They swim in the green glass waves of the bay and generally enjoy everything that the mansion has to offer while it's still light out before changing into evening wear in one of the many spare rooms and coming down the wide marble staircases in pairs, ready to throw themselves into the pulsing energy of the night. 

The beach is now empty as the unfamiliar man in the front seat pulls into the long drive snaking up the lawn and tries to find a place to park amongst the crowd of other automobiles. People dressed to the nines, still in their swimming suits, and everything in between trail up the lawn, bright light and the sound of many people talking all at once enticing them towards the house. 

The car comes to a stop, finding a lucky spot not too far from the house, the excitement rolling off each and every person surrounding you palpable in the air. Jaehyun opens the door and steps out before offering a hand to help you down. You take it with a slight smile, T-strap heels clicking against the pavement as you dismount and shut the door. The hand placed on top of Jaehyun’s quickly found its way to his elbow as he leads you up the lawn towards the french doors, thrown wide open and spilling the bright light that illuminated the inside and the growing noise of the party as people traversed in and out of the house. 

Irene and the driver were not far behind you, a familiar flirtatious bounce in her step as they traipse up the lawn. You knew from the way she looked at him一predatorial, like she was going to devour him but make him feel like he was the one doing the stalking一that you wouldn’t be seeing much of her after a certain point in the night. This wasn’t uncommon for Irene, she always said she liked the “thrill of the chase without having to do the chasing.” You supposed your own plans for tonight weren’t all that different, what with your search for the host. Usually that would’ve bothered you, as you didn’t particularly approve of Irene’s galavanting at events she shouldn’t really be present at in the first place, but tonight you were too wrapped up in the events unfolding to care all that much. 

The tiered silk of your dress swished against your calves, the heavy beading giving it a swing which accentuated the swing of your hips that grew with your confidence as you made your way up the wide steps leading to Ten’s front door. With each stride you take forward the noise inside seemed to dull a bit, fading away until it was just a buzzing murmur in the background. Your vision zeroes in on the mahogany doors, a small window to what felt almost like a whole other universe contained inside the mansion. You tended to get star-struck easily, but there was something different about the feeling tonight. An excitement burned in your veins, one you had never felt before, as if your body was in the know about some mysterious outcome or event of tonight. It felt as though you were surrounded by a bubble of water that hazed over the silhouettes of people and faded the harmonies of the symphony buzzing somewhere inside, laughter and the faint clinking of glasses tinny in your ears. 

There was something about the atmosphere that drew you in. You would never quite be able to explain the feeling, that odd tugging deep in your chest yanking you forward by some invisible string of fate. All feeling seemed to have left you except the aching want to throw yourself into the fray and dance until your feet fell off, drink until the sun came up, feel the burn of others’ cigarette smoke in your lungs until you choked, search for a companion until you found the right one. 

Time had slowed, and the usual clacking of your heels deepened to a hearty thud for each step you took. Every movement dragged you farther down under the surface, your sense of anything outside the confines of the house melting away until you had been utterly consumed by the muted liveliness of the party before you had even joined in. Everything happened so fast for being in slow motion, and before you could get the gears turning once again and recognize that you were no longer on the path leading to the steps Jaehyun was leading you through the double doors. The bubble popped. Imaginary water came crashing down around you, streaming off your hair and down your dress. The sensation was so strong you could swear that you felt the rivulets on your arms, the dampness of your hair on your neck. 

Everything was suddenly crystal clear, blurred forms regaining their sharp edges and an almost overwhelming surge of music and din of conversation assaulting your senses all at once. You look down at the ground, somewhat disoriented and almost expecting a puddle of water underneath you, drips falling from the hem of your dress, but there was nothing. The ground was dry, as it should be, and you shook your head slightly to yourself in hopes it would draw you back to reality a bit. 

As Jaehyun tugs you along, slipping nimbly through the crowds gathered in the tastefully decorated foyer, you simultaneously began to regain your wits and let your thoughts drift. An odd mix of cigar smoke, lust, and overbearing perfume hung in the air, threatening to put you in a trance and drag you away. There was always a feeling of disconnection with the world around you that creeped in at Ten’s parties. Often you would let it carry you away, but tonight you were here for more than just your own enjoyment, and so you clung to Jaehyun like a lifeline. He would glance back at you every few seconds, a reassuring smile on his face as your hand on his arm began to squeeze just a little tighter, the tiniest bit afraid you would lose him in the kinetic chaos of dancing and laughing. 

No guest goes without a glass of something to wash their inhibitions right down the drain, and many swipe the tiny sandwiches or pastries offered by butlers expertly balancing platters of hors d'oeuvres in hand as they expertly navigate through the throngs of people. You’re no black sheep tonight, for Jaehyun presses a glass of expensive champagne into your hand as you seek a somewhat less crowded place to enjoy the night, a replica clutched in his own. There are none who stand alone in this crowd, either surrounded by a group just as free spirited as themselves or paired off, hanging off their partners’ arms and not so subtly sneaking suggestive glances at each other. 

For each corner you turn you see a familiar face一an old acquaintance from school, a friend’s sister, the man who works at the bank. But just as quickly as you recognize them their  identities slip from your mind, partly from a combination of the overwhelming amount of people crowding around you on every side and the buzz of energy and alcohol. 

Ten’s parties were known for being quite anonymous to those looking for a good time. Those in attendance would always see people they knew outside the bubble of safety Long Island offered on night like these, yet no matter how scandalous their behavior it would never become public knowledge. Gossip was unavoidable, yet that was always how it stayed一mere gossip for the wealthy ladies to discuss over tea. As darkness fell over the bay so came a cloak of anonymity that drew in people like moths to a lightpost. 

An hour or so of aimlessly wandering the three story mansion, people have dispersed a bit which means that the rooms are a bit easier to navigate, though there is still no lack of bodies. You trail along through the groups of dancers, some getting drunk, all throwing caution to the wind (perhaps a little too much). The symphony had changed songs, now playing something with a bit more of a sexy tone to it and you sway slightly along to the beat as you walk. Idly chatting with Jaehyun, one hand on his arm and the other filled with a glass of something sticky sweet to replace the long gone champagne, the two of you traverse through Ten’s mansion, both surveying the rooms and glancing at the people passing by. 

He’s got quite the handsome face, and most people wouldn’t look past that on a night such as this. But he’s looking for something tonight, you can see it in his eyes. The subtle way his gaze flicks up and down the figures of women in dresses fancier than yours as he uses eyeing the crowds for a clearish path as an excuse to not be looking solely at you. The slight desire he holds as his eyes take in the people milling about matches exactly with the look he gave you when you first sat down next to him in Irene’s friend’s car, and the way he flicks nervously between observing the other women in the room and you, still holding fast to his arm, lets you know that he’s not yet sure if you’re what he wants. 

It doesn’t bother you though. He’s not what you’re looking for tonight either. 

You’re looking for Ten. Though you only vaguely knew what he looked like, you always kept one eye sliding over the many people you run across, hoping to see a face that would strike you as the one person that intrigues you most. You’ve always heard rumors that he never seems to be present at the parties he throws, but personally you have a hunch that he likes to hide in the cover of the crowds. You’ve done your fair share of research about the man, not that drunken recollections and idle gossip are much to go off of, but none of the people you’ve asked about him seem to care all that much. Free drinks, a good time, and the beautiful people that crowded into Ten’s mansion was enough to make most forget about the mysterious host within a matter of minutes. 

But not you. He intrigues you too much, and though you’ve been tempted to drown yourself in the pleasure offered up on all sides, your quest to find Ten is more important. 

Not so important that you can’t enjoy yourself as you search though. Jaehyun is good company, and the two of you mingle amongst the other guests. As you drift along, you meet people you would never believe were really there, had really talked with you, were it not for the reputation that Ten’s extravaganzas held and the fact that you had seen them with your own eyes. Actors, musicians, the richest of the rich, all to be found in the same house at the same time. Supposedly he knew many of them personally and had genuinely invited them. Many of the stories you’ve heard sounded more like they were just fantasies that had been made up with the help of some strong liquor and many expensive looking partygoers, but it seemed as though there was more truth to them than expected. Ten was a strange figure, and while most just take advantage of the numerous bars and sensually lit gardens, you’re itching to get to the bottom of the mystery that is Ten Lee. 

After several hours of drifting here and there in the house, you and Jaehyun find your way down to the gardens. The party still rages on the lawns, though there are a few less people and a bit more space. It's just as well lit as inside, and the alcohol flows just as plentily. Your surroundings are somewhat more tame, as people have more space to move around and less reason to do so. 

After exploring the gardens for a while, you nudge Jaehyun and tell him that your feet have begun to feel tired, after all standing around in heels for several hours isn’t exactly the most fun you’ve ever had. The two of you find a place to sit quickly, and you settle at a table already set up with a small group. A company of eight gorgeous figures sit there, several paired off with a partner equally as stunning on their arm. (You have to wonder; were only those perceived by the host as beautiful invited? What of those who just showed up?) Irene is among them, the reason you had decided on this particular table. She shares a drink with the driver from earlier, talking with you when necessary though most of her attention was focused on the man on her right. You sit to her left, with Jaehyun on yours. Swirling your drink around, you do your best to pay attention to Irene, although it’s not going so well. 

Something, or someone, has caught your eye. 

Your attention is brought back to the conversation you’re supposed to be participating in when Irene laughs一a high pitched sound that could be perceived as either mellifluous or grating depending on your temperament一as tonight’s beaux says something that’s supposed to be funny. You don’t think he’s particularly humorous but half heartedly play along anyway, eyes unabashedly set on the man sitting across the table and to the right a bit. 

He’s truly ethereal, both in looks and mannerisms. With a sharp and elegantly curved nose, dark hair swept tastefully to the side, and a sparkle of something dangerous you can’t quite place but find attractive anyway in his catlike eyes, he draws stares not just from you, but all across the garden. The sharp contrasting colors of his tuxedo seem to brighten his honeyed skin, his every movement graceful as he entrances you, all dazzling smiles and pretty features. 

You can tell that he’s so much more than that though. There are layers and layers to this man, all hidden just below the surface, and you feel the desire to claw your way into him and analyse every bit swelling somewhere in the back of your mind as he catches your eyes locked on him. His smile grows just the slightest bit before he turns back to the light flirtation he seemed to be pressing upon the woman next to him.

Though he had been an ideal partner for the earlier parts of the night, Jaehyun is almost forgotten in the presence of this new man. However, not so much that you don’t notice his attention drifting to another table. Watching his line of vision, you locate the young woman he has his eyes set on. She’s not hard to find, beautiful even compared to the other guests she’s gathered with. Wearing a slinky red dress topped with a fur shawl, she’s certainly quite the sight to see, and your companion has been observing her for a while now. 

It appears you weren’t what he was looking for after all. 

“Jaehyun,” you say, sipping on your drink delicately, “You should go on without me for a bit. I see how you’re eyeing the bar over there.” 

It’s a lie. His eyes flick from you back in the direction the woman in red was for just a second, and though it barely happened, a subtle movement that seemed instinctive, ot’s enough to give him away. Though he does his best not to show it you can see the recognition that you’ve seen through his show of keeping his eyes solely on you dawning in his eyes. 

“Ahh, but I shouldn’t leave you alone.” Still the same gentleman you met in the back of the automobile. Or perhaps he was just putting up appearances, there was no way to tell. It didn’t really matter anyway, you had your sights set on something higher than the possibility of the deeper fragments of this man’s personality. 

“I’ll be fine,” you wave off his concerns nonchalantly. “I’m not alone anyway, I’ve got Irene here!” At the sound of her name your friend looks over, leaning on the tabe slightly as she sends a wink at you and Jaehyun. 

You read the wink as more of a “I see you eyeing your man, if you don’t disappear with him it’s quite a shame and I might just take the responsibility upon myself,” although you were hoping Jaehyun, who you assumed was unused to Irene’s wiley charms, would see it as more of a “I’ve got Y/n, you go on now.” 

Either way, he seemed to take the hint, although he remained reluctant. 

You pat his arm, “You go and have fun, Jaehyun, I don’t want to drag you down.”

“Not at all,” he replied gently, and it seemed to you almost calculated the way his eyes didn’t stray from you in the moment. You weren’t sure why he was bothering to keep up the premise that he would be returning, that his interest in you hadn’t evaporated the moment the fur shawled woman pulled his attention to her the very first time. You both knew, and no one around you was aware enough of their surroundings to pay you any attention. But no matter, it wasn’t important to you.

“Well,” his words are hesitant, as if unsure of his decision, “if you insist. Would you like me to grab you anything?” 

“No, no, thank you but I’m alright.”

As he stands up and pushes his chair back into place, Jaehyun gives you one last look. It’s apologetic, he isn’t particularly proud of the way he was just leaving you for someone a bit more flashy and boisterous. But again, you don’t care. He can either deal with the guilt in the morning or drink enough to forget the whole night, it was no longer your problem. It hadn’t been since you locked eyes with the pretty man across the table. 

Before Jaehyun was even out of sight the man you had been watching across the table catches your gaze once again. This time he stands and sidles over to the chair on your left that Jaehyun had abandoned moments before, sitting lightly beside you. 

“Good evening.” His voice, low and silky with a hint of an accent you can’t quite recognize, would have knocked you right over if you were the swooning main character of some unrealistic romance film. He takes your hand and presses it to his lips, a coy smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth. 

“Might I ask whose presence I’ve been graced with tonight?” he inquires, and you tell him your name. “Miss Y/n,” he repeats. "Pretty." You raise an eyebrow at this, enjoying his efforts nonetheless. 

“And you? What’s your name?” 

He merely hums in response. “Has anyone told you that you look gorgeous tonight darling?” You let his avoidance slide, momentarily moving on. Some people wished to not reveal themselves, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t continue to enjoy his company.

“They have, in fact,” you say, thinking back to Jaehyun. You glance across the room but he’s long gone, the woman dressed in red having disappeared as well. 

“As it should be.”

Your attention is drawn back to your current suitor, and the nights former flirtations are quickly forgotten as conversation strikes up between the two of you. Every other word out of his is some flirtation or another, and you absolutely bask in the attention that the cat eyed man lays on you. His forearms are leaned on the table, and he’s staring up at you as if you’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. You’re sure that your face mirrors his, but in your case it’s true. He really is the most strikingly beautiful human being you’ve ever had the pleasure to set eyes on. And for the moment, he’s all yours. 

There’s something oddly familiar about him though, and the fact that you can’t figure out why is rubbing you the wrong way. It would be quite impossible to forget a face like that. The feeling is not so much recognition as it is that odd niggling feeling of deja vu that plagues your thoughts in a situation that you know you’ve never experienced before. You try to stay slightly wary of his presence, but he’s downright entrancing and your focus slips to his stunning features every time you feel like you’re approaching the answer as to who he is. 

You’re unsure of how much time has passed when he leans closer to you, lips brushing lightly against the hair falling over your ear. “Perhaps we could find somewhere we could talk a little bit more一” He sets a hand on your waist and a shiver runs up your spine一 “privately.” 

You grin slyly as he pulls away, awaiting an answer with his own smirk. 

“It would be my pleasure.” You glance over to Irene, thinking you should let her know that you would be sneaking off for a while, but she was already gone.

And so, all suspicion tossed right out the window, you follow this handsome stranger. His arm tucked securely around yours, the two of you dash up through the bright gardens, whisking by the tables full of couples making eyes at each other and under the pretty strings of lights, up the lawn and once again through the french doors, still wide open, although with less people flooding in and out. You duck through the crowd of people still meandering around in the foyer, expertly weaving around dancers and drinkers. He takes you through the ballrooms and up a few grand sets of grand staircases, which you certainly would have tripped down were it not for the tight grip he had now moved to your waist. 

“You seem to know your way around quite well, do you come here often?” you inquire as you slip down a hallway that was mostly devoid of guests. 

That odd, dangerous glint you saw when you first caught sight of him reappeared in his eyes. “You could say that,” he chuckled.

Before you could wrap your head around what that meant he was pulling you into a spacious bedroom at the end of the hall and letting his hold on you cease to draw the door shut behind him. You turn away from him and marvel at the bedroom he had chosen. The room (which you assume to be a spare) is although fairly simple obviously belonging to someone extremely wealthy. 

A pretty chandelier hangs from the ceiling, and you have the feeling that the cufflinks scattered across the desk and the edging of the mirror above the vanity might just be real gold. You can see expensive velvet peeking out of the slightly ajar wardrobe, and just from glancing at them think the bedsheets to be silk. 

The only light in the room comes from the golden gleam of the gardens spilling through the french windows. The pretty glow gives the moment a sensuous and romantic feel, and you turn back to the cat-eyed man. He basks in the golden light, as if he knows that it's good to his complexion, accentuating the honeyed tone of his skin and shining in his hair. 

A hopeful smile works it’s way across your face, a gleam of eros in your eye as you take a step closer to him, hoping he doesn’t turn out to be a total bore like many of the men you meet at parties. A matching desire shows on his face, fingers reaching up to begin working at the black material of his bowtie. He expertly undoes the knot, and tosses the inconsequential scrap of fabric to the side. 

Placing a hand on your waist, he draws you towards himself as he takes small steps backwards, eventually landing against the wall with a slight thud. Your arms wind their way around his neck, and you press yourself up against him, sandwiching his lithe body between yours and the wall. 

As he traces your features with his eyes, a slight change occurs deep within them, a darkness pooling in his pupils and that familiar hint of danger from earlier making itself present once again. 

The corners of his mouth tug upwards slightly, and as he leans forward you tilt your head to nudge your nose against his, eyes fluttering shut. You meet him halfway, lips pressed together in a light kiss, almost as if you were just testing the waters, unsure as to whether you were truly interested. 

And, come to find out, you definitely were. His mouth was soft on yours, keeping your pace for the moment. You draw back for a moment, taking a breath and reinitiating the kiss, plunging yourself into his mysterious depths. 

He tastes of secrecy and some sweet cordial you can’t quite place, and you have never known something quite so heavenly. The heavy feeling of his mouth on yours is addictive, all your senses alight at once, and your hands grasp the lapels of his jacket, trying to draw him closer despite there being no space left between you. 

“What should I call you?” you whisper against his lips as you come up for air. His eyes flick open, meeting your own as you take a step back and pull him along to slip your hands under the shoulders of his jacket. He chuckles slightly, detaching your hold on him to undo the button and slip out of his jacket, hanging it over the back of the chair before the vanity. 

“That doesn’t matter.” His hands resume their rightful place on your waist, one sliding down to your hip and drawing you into his figure. “Just enjoy yourself.”

“Oh, trust me,” you press a kiss to his jaw, taking his hand and slinking out of his embrace to place yourself on the end of the bed, “I am.” (You don’t notice until later, but the sheets were in fact silk.)

You tug him along to where you sit, bringing him forward and between your knees. You tilt your head upward as your hands come to rest on his waist, sealing your lips together again. 

You lose yourself to him, the feeling of his thin, wandering fingers tracing your silhouette and the way he pays the same amount of attention to every inch of your body, as if he was trying to memorize every dip and curve of your figure under the silk of your dress. The sweet taste of his mouth entrances you, and when he moves to press his lips to your neck or the line of your jaw between long winded kisses you feel as though you’ve ascended. 

Time no longer exists in the muted bubble of a third floor bedroom in an unfamiliar house. Perhaps it’s only been seconds, and maybe you’ve been locking lips with a handsome stranger for hours, the party melting away to make way for dawn to dutifully traipse her way into the sky. Nothing matters anymore, you’re far too immersed in the passion of the moment to pay much attention to anything other than your unnamed lover. 

Though in reality it’s only physical, he’s explored you so much that you feel with each slide of his tongue against yours he reveals another one of your secrets, one of your stories, something only you know. Despite the intimate impersonality of finding a lover in a stranger, despite the illusion of invasiveness that his careful movements bring, you want to fully surrender yourself to this feeling. Breaking a particularly lengthy kiss, he presses on your shoulder to get you to lean back, and you rest your weight on one hand behind you, the other busy clutching at the silky strands of his hair. 

“You know,” you say, words broken in between the slotting of your mouths back together, “I came to this party in search of the ever so elusive Ten Lee, but goodness一” you press a particularly sloppy kiss to his lips, and he hisses as you tug gently on his hair一 “I do believe I’ve found something much better.”

“Oh, darling, don’t you see?” He presses on your shoulder again, and you fall back to sprawl yourself across the bed. He hovers over you, dipping to kiss the corner of your mouth. “I am Ten.” 

With a smirk that would haunt you for the rest of your days, he gives you one last mindblowing kiss before evaporating into the shadows of the room, straightening the black vest he wore and slipping his suit jacket back on. As you pushed yourself back up so you were supported by your hands behind you, dazed and trying to comprehend what he had just whispered against your skin, Ten turned to look at you. He threw you one last look, a dangerous, beautiful look, before slinking out the door, back into the whirlwind of dancing and debauchery. 

That night would never leave your mind. 

No matter how many parties you attended, no matter how many men circulated through your life, no matter how much you drank, you could never forget Ten. And you’ve tried. He would forever live in your mind, fleeting thoughts of a bedroom flooded with golden light, of his discarded suit jacket, of that gleam in his eyes the first time you saw him.

It would take you many years and much consideration to finally figure out what that look in his eye was, that strange mirth you had never seen another wearing. Later in life, when you’re much wiser and have experienced more than your younger self who met Ten could even imagine, it comes to you one day. You realise that he seemed to find as much pleasure in the facade he presented to the world, the fanciful rumors and scandalous whispers that followed him like a shadow, as he did in the heated intimacy you shared in a darkened bedroom one night of the Roaring Twenties. 

You would attend many more parties held in that mansion, sometimes dragged along by Irene, sometimes finding yourself there alone and unsure of why a somewhat faded memory keeps leading you back here. Every time, you held onto a fleeting hope that you could see just a glance, a sliver of the man you met that fateful night. But as much as you held onto the notion that you would see him again someday, you knew it was foolish. Ten’s reputation preceded him, and he liked to uphold that reputation. 

True to your logic, Ten would never make himself known to you again. For years you would search, a futile attempt to prove to yourself he wasn’t just something you dreamed up in the haze of alcohol and the feeling of weightlessness one can only find on Long Island Sound on Saturday nights as the extravagant parties thrown by a man who rarely showed his face rage on. 

Ten Lee, larger than life, beautiful, nebulous Ten Lee, truly was elusive, barely more than a shadow to his grand reputation.

[staytheb]

Elusive

Pairing: TXT’s Yeonjun x OC [Chaeyeon] Genre: college!au, slice of life, slight fluff Word Count: 4,580 Summary: Yeonjun and Chaeyeon are just friends, but it could be a little more than that. Well, maybe more for Yeonjun as Chaeyeon’s a bit oblivious.

Warning: none... i think. lol

hi! so i got to writing about Yeonjun from TXT! so the group has been removed from RESERVED and over to INACTIVE for now as i still dunno how often i will write with them in mind, but this came about and i’m still learning the members so this may not be as accurate. then again, this is a re-work of my other story Exclusive which only features one pairing and not a second one like the original. anyways, hopefully all my re-works can be done by the end of the year and to include more groups to write for as well. other than that, happy reading and kthxbai, Admin Lia~

"You've got to be kidding me." Chaeyeon said in disbelief upon arriving early to her 8AM class.

Apparently it had been cancelled for the remainder of the week and she totally forgot about it.

"I really need to pay better attention."

Running a hand through her hair she heard a chuckle from behind her and turned around to see her classmate and friend, Yeonjun, walking up to her with a bubble tea in each hand.

"You're cute."

Chaeyeon made a face upon hearing his compliment.

"I'm not."

"Anyways, good morning." He greeted with a cheery attitude.

Chaeyeon frowned knowing that for her it was not a good morning.

"It's not. Anyways, why are you here?"

"To hang out with you since I knew you forgot that this class was cancelled for the rest of the week."

He grinned as Chaeyeon rolled her eyes.

"Oh wow, the great and mighty Choi Yeonjun gracing me with his royal presence. Thank you so much for your thoughtfulness."

Yeonjun's excited expression dampened a bit.

"Gee, thanks, Chae. I was gonna give you this taro milk tea to make you feel better, but instead I'll enjoy it myself."

He smirked as he took a sip out of the purple drink.

"Ah, so delicious."

"Go ahead."

Chaeyeon shrugged as she walked right pass him.

"I'll buy myself something else and kill time before my next class."

Yeonjun followed after her with a pout.

"You do know that the taro was for you, right?"

"I do, but you put your nasty germs on it and so I don't want it."

"But you share things with everyone else though?"

"I know, but you're a different story."

"Then you can have the other one."

He offered her the greenish-brown drink.

"No thanks. I don't really like mint chocolate as bubble tea."

"It's not like I have cooties, Chae."

"Um, Jun, have you forgotten about your fans?"

She shot him a look.

"Because I'm not tryna get killed, which I'm surprised that there is none lurking around sending me death glares."

"Stop. I don't have fans." Yeonjun disagreed as he brushed off the topic.

"Whatever you wanna call them, they won't kill you. You're my friend and I haven't seen them give you any dirty looks."

"One, they're two-faced because when you turn around to look at them their so-called angelic faces appear. Two, I'm a female friend that's closer to you than they'll ever be to which to this day I still don't know how we're friends, honestly. We don't really have that much in common."

"Friends don't always have to have similar interests, Chaeyeon. It's mutual respect and a connection. Anyways, is that supposed to be a good thing or a bad thing?" Yeonjun interjected upon hearing the part about them being friends.

"You can take it however you want."

Chaeyeon chuckled before continuing.

"Anyways, true, but maybe it's because you always copy my homework and sit next to me in class when you can literally sit anywhere else."

"Because you have better handwriting and you don't stare at me constantly."

"I wonder why."

She rolled her eyes before shooting him a look.

"Psh. And here you say they're not your fans."

Serena then took the purple drink from him and took a sip to assure him of their close relationship.

"Thanks though, but you still owe me something to eat from last time."

"Yeah, yeah. I know. You won't stop reminding me. Anyways, forget about them. They're not important."

He dismissed the topic about the fans.

"I'll meet you in the library at our usual spot then, yeah?"

Yeonjun informed her as the two split in different directions. While Chaeyeon was casually making her way up the stairs towards the library she suddenly heard her name being shouted from behind her. Just as she had turned around to see who it was she was suddenly tackled to the ground with the person on top of her while her drink fumbled away from her.

"Smile!"

The male announced happily as he held up his phone with one hand while the other hand held a placard to take a self-portrait of himself and Chaeyeon which she immediately partially blocked her face in time.

"Get off, Sim Jaeyun!"

Chaeyeon tried shoving the friend and classmate of hers off of her.

Jaeyun chuckled nervously as he obeyed while backing away from Chaeyeon with a good amount of space between them as another friend and classmate, Park Jongseong, joined them a moment later while catching his breath.

"Sorry, Chaeyeon. I tried, but once he saw you he ran so fast that I couldn't keep up." Jongseong explained once he caught his breath before a cheeky smile appeared on his face.

"Also, I wanted to see what would happen and the outcome was hilarious."

"You're a brat, Jongseong." Chaeyeon scoffed while fixing herself, but shot the two a friendly look.

"What are you two doing out and about so early in the morning?"

"Trying to complete the scavenger list." Jaehyun answered as he held up his placard.

"I really want this customized leather jacket just for Beta Heta Mu members."

"Of course. You're cute, Jaeyun."

Chaeyeon smiled before her eyes landed on the boba that Yeonjun had given her.

"But you owe me a drink though."

"I will if only..."

"If only what?"

"Basically Jaeyun wants you to help him out with gaining points." Jongseong answered with a blank look.

"That's why he ran so fast to catch you."

"The last time I helped I still didn't get my reward."

Jaeyun nervously rubbed the back of his neck before casting the female a pleading look.

"I will double the reward. Please help me out, Chaeyeon, especially since you're a Nu Tau Zeta member and it'll double or even triple the points."

"Ugh, fine, but I'm only gonna do just like two with you since you tackled me."

She then glared at him.

"You already took one, so you're left with one now."

"Oh, thank you, thank you!" Jaeyun thanked her while wrapping his arms around her in a hug.

"You're the best."

"Yeah, yeah. You're lucky that you're cute. Anyways, just tell me one of them that you need to do."

"I don't get why you put up with it when you know that you don't want to do it." Jongseong stated as Chaeyeon shrugged.

"I dunno. I guess you gotta give good karma to receive good karma."

"Wow. So it's basically for your own selfish gain?"

"Sure, why not? Don't judge me, Jongseong."

"You're cute, Chaeyeon."

He laughed as she narrowed her eyes at Jongseong.

"You want to do a few tasks, too, don't you?"

"Am I that obvious?"

"If there's a customized leather jacket, then yes."

Jongseong laughed with a nod.

"You caught me."

"Anyways, I already did the 'Tackle the opposite gender'. Let's see what else I can do." Jaeyun muttered as he checked his list and marked off the ones that he had already done.

"Oh, how about this one, Chaeyeon?"

Jaeyun showed Chaeyeon one of the tasks as she nodded.

"Sure, Jaeyun."

Jaehun happily got his phone ready to take the picture as Chaeyeon endured Beta Heta Mu's scavenger list for the sake of friendship while partially covering her face since she didn't want to get exposed either. She ended up doing a few more for both Jongseong and Jaeyun. The things she does in wanting to help out friends since the tasks weren't breaking laws or humiliating towards the members or others involved. Something she definitely gave the fraternity credit for. After that the trio bid goodbyes with Chaeyeon picking up her wasted boba drink to toss before making her way inside the library.

Yeonjun entered the quiet area where he and Chaeyeon met often in the library while spotting her sleeping with her arms folded on the table and using them as pillows. He chuckled at the sight while placing a ham and cheese bagel sandwich along with an iced americano by her things. Once he settled in the chair next to her while taking a sip of his own iced americano did Chaeyeon stir awake. She looked over at him sleepily while scrunching her nose at the aroma of the drinks.

"Gah, I hate the smell of coffee."

Yeonjun's eyebrows furrowed.

"I thought you like coffee?"

"I actually don't like coffee at all."

She pushed her coffee away and towards Yeonjun while picking up the bagel to eat.

"Thanks."

He stared at Chaeyeon questioningly in mid-bite of his own ham and cheese bagel sandwich.

"Wait a minute, Chae. Are you telling me that you hate coffee despite me buying it for our study sessions together since we've met?"

"Uh, yeah, basically." Chaeyeon answered with a sheepish laugh.

"Sorry, not sorry?"

"Dude, why didn't you just tell me? You honestly finished it every time or left a little bit and I didn't think anything of it."

"Because you genuinely looked pleased every time you gave it to me. It was cute and I just didn't have it in me to tell you the truth."

"I can't believe you didn't tell me."

"You'll get over it. Anyways, Jun, now you have double the coffee for your day today."

Yeonjun side-eyed her while taking the other drink back and taking a quick sip from it.

"What else are you hiding from me?"

"A lot of things." 

Chaeyeon cast him a secretive smile as she continued eating the bagel. Yeonjun left the subject alone as he brought out his materials to study, a loose piece of paper floated to the ground and Chaeyeon went to retrieve it instead before her friend could. Upon closer inspection she realized that it was the same BHM scavenger list that Jaehyun had.

"I forgot you're a Beta Heta Mu member." Chaeyeon remarked while placing the paper on top of his bag.

"So you're doing this, too?"

"Something like that."

He picked up the paper to scan it.

"I haven't really started, but I don't think I'm gonna do it either."

"Why not?"

"I don't have time. I really need to pass my classes this semester. I barely managed last semester."

"It's easier to do with a friend or two, Yeonjun. The scavenger hunt list, I mean. I'm sure you have some."

Yeonjun rolled his eyes.

"I do, Chaeyeon, but my schedule doesn't correlate well with theirs."

She glanced at him curiously.

"Do you want to complete the list?"

"Well yeah, I do, but I don't have the time to do so."

"What do you get out of this list if you complete the whole thing?"

"Well the points I accumulate will give me entries to the End of the School Year raffle."

"But there's something else that you want, right?"

Yeonjun smiled embarrassed as the thought of what he wanted popped into his head.

"Yeah."

"And that is?"

Chaeyeon tried to get it out of him.

"Tell me and I'll help you."

"You will?" He asked shocked before eyeing her suspiciously.

"Wait, why? You would rather be in bed right now than doing anything really productive."

"I have my moments, Jun, and I feel like doing something productive today besides school stuff at the moment."

"Y'know there's like more than fifty things on that list, right?"

"True, but it's mainly to help out a friend. Also I know that you want this. So what is it?"

"If I complete that list or score the most points out of anyone for that list, then I get to be center for the group photo when school's over."

"That's it?"

"Yeah. Oh and I get to host the final house banquet this school term and the first house banquet next school term."

"Okay, that's good."

Yeonjun looked at his friend unsure.

"Are you sure you want to help me?"

"I mean, not really, but I don't mind helping out others from time to time." 

Chaeyeon shrugged with a small smile.

"Alright, thanks, but I do need a date though for the banquet."

"And I'm sure that won't be a problem."

"Could I ask you in advance since you won't be all..."

"Fangirl mode?"

She cocked a brow as he nodded with a laugh.

"Yeah."

"You're cute, Jun. See, even you're thinking those people are fans now."

Yeonjun rolled his eyes, but looked at her with hopeful eyes despite feeling a bit giddy inside.

"So what do you say? Will you be my date?"

"I'll think about it."

He scoffed at her response as Chaeyeon chuckled.

"Anyways, let's go make you center, Choi Yeonjun, and a banquet host."

The pair got to working on the tasks that were quick and easy to do at the moment. After helping Yeonjun complete almost everything listed that she was comfortable with, Chaeyeon went to her last class for the day. Afterwards she had tutoring sessions in the library. Just as the tutoring ended Chaeyeon felt her phone vibrate. She ignored it since it was only a text message, but when it vibrated several more times she went on ahead to check it out while gathering her things and headed out of the library. Chaeyeon received several messages from her sorority's president, Im Jinah, and upon scanning the last one it was informing her to report to the president as soon as possible.

"Hello, Chaeyeon." Jinah greeted her with a smile as she motioned for her to sit.

Chaeyeon noticed the others of her sorority council in the room as she took a seat.

"Take a breath and slowly exhale. It's nothing bad or serious, so don't stress about that." Jinhee, the vice-president, chuckled as the treasurer, Jiyeon, smiled.

"Yeah, it's only to discuss attendance for the social gatherings this school term."

Chaeyeon relaxed and looked at her fellow sisters calmly awaiting permission to speak when prompted to.

"Now, Chaeyeon," Miso, the secretary, began with a gentle look in her direction, "We know you wanna be low- key and we're okay with that."

"Yeah, like super low-key under the radar type." Jinhee added with a laugh before speaking again, "But we definitely would appreciate it more if you attended one more event before the school term ends."

Jiyeon nodded in agreement.

"We acknowledged the fact that you do, do your part as a fellow sister of Nu Tau Zeta and haven't caused us any scandals or embarrassments since being with us."

She then cast a look at her fellow council members.

"Still..." She trailed off as Jinah continued instead.

"As the president of Nu Tau Zeta, I'm ordering you to attend one more social event as per socializing with those around you not in Nu Tau Zeta. Plus, you'll need to stay for more than an hour. Not just make appearances to several attendees and leave soon after."

Jinah smiled as Chaeyeon made a face causing everyone else in the room to laugh.

"You don't have to mingle much, just chill or relax and eat good food. Just stay past an hour and you're set to leave."

Chaeyeon nodded.

"Alright, will do, Jinah."

"Think of it this way, Chaeyeon, by joining a sorority you're committing yourself to a lifetime of network connections."

Miso grinned as Chaeyeon nodded with a smile.

"I know."

"Wonderful. That is all."

Chaeyeon was dismissed and returned to her room for a quick nap.

"Alright, fellas, it's officially midnight and the votes are accounted for and the results are now out!"

Yeonjun and the rest of his brothers awaited the results of the overall winner of Beta Heta Mu's Scavenger Hunt.

"Who will be our number one picture center and banquet host this school term and next school term?!"

Yeonjun anxiously awaited the announcement.

"Number one is..." The member paused for dramatic effect.

"It's Choi Yeonjun with a whopping nine hundred and nine points!"

Everyone congratulated Yeonjun as he was shocked and surprised that he actually won the scavenger hunt. He later learned from his president that Chaeyeon was an elusive member of Nu Tau Zeta and that a majority of the campus forget she's a member. The Nu Tau Zeta's president assisted in adding the sorority into the fraternity's scavenger hunt and was the one to review all the photos to see if any sorority members were featured in any of the pictures. Anyways, Chaeyeon's elusiveness allowed Yeonjun to win. Yeonjun smiled, causing him to think seriously about her.

Chaeyeon's phone buzzed and she reached out to find her phone to silence the call. She almost fell back asleep, but her phone buzzed once more and she silenced it once again without bothering to look at the caller ID again. Chaeyeon sighed when her mobile went off a third time and she repeated the same action as before. She felt it vibrate and dinged a second later to notify her that she now got a message and it repeated three more times and Chaeyeon knew that she wasn't going back to sleep peacefully unless she put it on 'do not disturb' and only set it for alarms instead.

Picking up her phone to do just that, Chaeyeon was surprised that it was already so late and that it was Yeonjun contacting her. He usually just messaged her once or twice. Even then he hardly ever called her unless he needed something. Or wanting to be an annoying brat to bother her, but it didn't happen often. Just as she was about to set her phone to 'do not disturb', Yeonjun's name popped up indicating that he was calling her for a fourth time. Chaeyeon contemplated whether to ignore it or not, but decided to answer the call.

"Hello?"

"Can we meet?" Yeonjun asked her out of the blue.

"Bruh, it's like one in the morning."

"Please, Chaeyeon."

Chaeyeon was about to decline when she heard his next words and reconsidered his suggestion.

"I got your favorite boba."

"I'm listening."

"You're cute. You know that, right, Chae?"

"I'm not, Jun, but whatever."

Yeonjun chuckled before speaking again.

"I also have your favorite snacks. So will you meet with me please?"

Chaeyeon thought about it before speaking a few seconds later.

"Honestly, it's late, Yeonjun, and yesterday's events were super eventful for me. I just kinda wanna sleep before classes start later today."

There was a long pause and Chaeyeon believed he may have hung up on her or she may have dozed off for a bit, but he was still on call with her and she gave him a moment to speak again. Still, Yeonjun didn't speak and she wondered if he had dozed off instead.

"Yeonjun?"

"Hmm?" He hummed a few seconds later.

"Oh, you're still awake."

"Yeah, I'm still awake."

Silence fell between them again until Chaeyeon broke it.

"Do you still wanna meet right now, Jun?"

"Yes, Chae, I do, but I also don't want to trouble you if you don't want to. I know how important sleep is for you."

"True for sleep, but you've already called and messaged me, Yeonjun."

Chaeyeon sat up and ran a hand through her hair slowly.

"Plus, I kinda can't go back to sleep right now."

"I'm sorry, Chae."

She could hear the sincerity in his voice and a small smile graced her lips.

"It's fine, Yeonjun. I'll get ready after you tell me where you wanna meet?"

"Do you remember the place where we met the first time?" Yeonjun asked not hesitating to tell her the meeting point.

Just as Chaeyeon was about to reply she was distracted by the vibration sound and light blinking from her roommate, Nayoung's, phone across the room. She ignored it, replied back to Yeonjun that she did, and hung up.

"Um, is it right here?" Chaeyeon asked herself when she arrived outside the classroom that she had first met Yeonjun.

"Or was it at the library?"

She second guessed herself upon not exactly remembering which location it was that they had met first.

"Shit. I should've just asked him."

"You're cute."

She heard from behind and languidly turned to face Yeonjun.

"You know, Chaeyeon, if we were together, I would have to set your alarms for all of our anniversaries and add in notes of our special places." Yeonjun responded while appearing from around the corner of the building holding a bag of snacks and two bubble tea drinks in hand.

Chaeyeon laughed with a shrug.

"Luckily we aren't, huh? I'll be a lost cause if anyone was in a relationship with me." She admitted taking her boba from him along with the bag.

"Thank you, Jun."

"You're welcome, and you're not a lost cause, Chae, just forgetful. Super forgetful and clumsy. It's cute."

"True, but not the cute part."

The two began roaming the campus aimlessly.

"Anyways, why do you wanna meet so randomly?"

She nudged him after taking a sip of her bubble tea.

"Oh, did you win the list thing and now you're center and host?"

"Yeah. It's all thanks to you."

"I helped a little. It was all you, Yeonjun."

"Actually, I only won in the end because you were a Nu Tau Zeta member that helped double my points along with gaining secret bonus points."

"Ah, so now you know I'm part of a sorority."

He smiled, but was still left wondering what other things she kept hidden in general.

"I know it's none of my business, but I feel like there's a lot of things I still don't know about you."

"But isn't that better though?" Chaeyeon remarked not looking at him.

"The less you know, the less you are aware of things."

"Why do I have a feeling that there's another meaning to those words when its coming from you, Chae?"

Yeonjun looked at her with a curious look just as she turned to face him with a small smile.

"You're thinking too much, Yeonjun."

"I don't think I am. I feel like you've been hiding yourself from me or at least trying to keep yourself distant for some reason."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"No, but I would like to get to know you better."

"Isn't what we have good enough?"

"But what if I want more?"

Chayeon stopped walking with Yeonjun doing the same and they faced one another while she cast him a curious yet cautious glance.

"Why?"

"Why what?" He asked, confused.

"Why do you want more? Why do you wanna get to know me better? Why are you suddenly interested in my life? Why?"

"Would you believe me if I told you that I have feelings for you?" Yeonjun answered with his own question instead.

"Are you being serious right now?"

"Yes, I am."

"Choi Yeonjun." Chaeyeon used his full name as a warning while Yeonjun did the same thing to mess with her.

"Lim Chaeyeon."

She narrowed her eyes at him with him shooting her a playful one.

"Out of all the girls and maybe guys in this school and your life, why me?"

"Honestly, I don't know, but here we are and all I know is that I like you and I would like to take our relationship to the next level."

"You do know that if we don't work out our friendship is ruined, right?"

"Chaeyeon, meeting you was fate. Becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you was beyond my control."

"Gosh, you're such a dork. I can't believe you would use that on me." 

Chaeyeon playfully punched his shoulder when she heard those words fall out of his mouth with Yeonjun laughing sheepishly.

"Okay, maybe I picked up a few things, but I really do mean them."

"Seriously though, love is a little too strong right now. We're just gonna go with like, okay?"

"So does that mean you also like me, too?"

"Well, I never actually thought about it beyond that or anything." Chaeyeon coyly responded as Yeonjun rolled his eyes knowingly.

"Nayoung was right. You really do like playing hard to get."

"I do not."

She then narrowed her eyes at him.

"You should not listen to Nayoung. She likes messing with me."

"Oh, yeah?" He answered with a mischievous glint in his eyes as he neared her and brought his face closer to Chaeyeon's.

"I started noticing all of your little signs yesterday that Nayoung pointed out to me when she told me, but thought it was just your introverted self at work."

He smiled wider.

"But now I'm beginning to think otherwise."

Chaeyeon slightly pushed him away while taking a step back herself to put some distance between them.

"Whatever, Yeonjun. Is this the only reason you asked me to meet you at one in the morning so you can clarify my feelings for you?"

"Partially." He answered with a chuckle before continuing.

"But I was hoping you'll actually say yes in being my date for the banquet."

"What if your fans kill me when they find out about us or whatever. I'ma die at the hands of some stupid girls that only like you superficially."

Yeonjun started laughing and Chaeyeon punched him again.

"Seriously, Yeonjun, it's not a laughing matter. I'm being serious about my future life here if we actually get together."

"I know, Chae, I know."

He calmed down from laughing before reaching a hand out to pull her body against his.

"And I'll be here to protect you."

"Couldn't you've just said that without pulling me against you?" She asked him while becoming aware of their close proximity.

"No, then I wouldn't be able to do this easily."

"Do w-"

Yeonjun pressed his lips against Chaeyeon's, silencing her in mid-sentence. When he pulled away, breaking the kiss, her first response was to slap his chest after regaining her senses back and he laughed.

"I can't believe Nayoung basically told you about my kissing preferences." Chaeyeon stated while feeling all sorts of emotions building up inside her and she didn't know which one to express more.

"Well she did tell me that I would have to make the first move since you would continue to run away from it."

"Of course she would."

"Anyways, now that I got the elusive Lim Chaeyeon to myself, you think she'll open up to me more now?"

"I dunno. She has a mind of her own, but I'll ask and get back to you as soon as possible on what she says."

Chaeyeon smiled after calming down the feelings inside of her.

"Although she does say and think that you're cute though."

Yeonjun gave her a look and she giggled at his reaction while hooking their arms together and leading them to walk aimlessly once more in a random direction after taking another sip of her bubble tea drink.

"C'mon. Let's just take it slow for now. It's too early to process all of this. We can deal with this when it's later in the afternoon or something."

"How about an official date?"

Yeonjun offered as Chaeyeon side-eyed him with a playful smile gracing her lips.

"How about no?"

"I respect your decision, but you're really not making this easier to take it a step further."

Chaeyeon chuckled as she took a sip. Yeonjun still didn't give up.

"I'll show you that it'll be worth it in the end, Chaeyeon."

"Okay, Yeonjun, and I'll try my best to be more open with you as best as I can."

"It's a start."

Yeonjun grinned happily as Chaeyeon smiled with a shake of her head.

"Yeah, it is."

[haechanitboy]

philophobia, ch. 4 - nervous

word count: 6.9k so close to 7k rip but i guess the word count in the texts is well past that

genre: smut, humor, fluff

contents: penetration, unprotected sex, alcohol use

pairing(s): jung jaehyun x female reader

notes: i hope you like it!! please leave feedback :)

“No, Taeyong, I can’t hang out today,” You sigh, entering the coffee shop.

“Why not? Buttercup misses you.” He whines through the phone, and you could swear you heard a pout in his voice.

“Because I need a day to myself for once! It’s Sunday, the Lord’s day of rest, and I’ve been choking on testosterone for too long, so I need to recuperate.”

“Okay,” He huffs, and you can definitely confirm that he’s pouting, “Text me when you need a dose of testosterone,” He jokes, and you snicker, making your way to the back of the line to the register.

“Will do,” You tease, and bid each other goodbye before hanging up. Waiting in the back of the line, you become very aware of a pair of eyes on you. You turn your head to lock eyes with Johnny from the supermarket, and he smiles and waves at you before going back to drawing something. You regard his angular features with interest before turning back to the line and moving up. You note with curiosity that he keeps staring at you before going back to his drawing, but don’t pay it much mind as you reach the register, ordering a caramel macchiato and a slice of marble pound cake.

You stand in line at the delivery counter, still very aware of Johnny’s eyes on you, and decide enough is enough. When you pick up your drink and pastry, you make your way over to his table determinedly. He smiles at first, but the look on your face causes his expression to falter.

“Take a picture,” You state, putting your hand on your hip, “It’ll last longer.”

“Say cheese,” He jokes, chuckling to himself, but his smile drops at your unamused expression.

“Aren’t you supposed to get consent before you start drawing strangers?” You say with a raised eyebrow, gesturing to his sketchbook which displays a half complete rendering of your face. (It’s very good, you note, but you won’t tell him that.)

“We know each other,” He points out.

“Not well enough.”

“Okay,” He says slowly, the smile coming back to his face. “Well, can I draw you?”

“Only if you do it well.”

“No picture could do you justice.” He says, winking.

“Well, in that case,” You reply, resting your drink and placing both hands on the table, “No.”

His smile fades away as he searches your expression for any signs of your joking.

“I’m kidding. Draw me all you like,” You smile elusively, picking up your drink and tucking your marble cake into your bag. “But I’m leaving, so you’d better hurry.”

“Wait! Don’t you wanna stay and, I don’t know...get to know each other?”

“Not really,” You reply, turning to leave.

“Well, do you come here often?”

“Often enough.” You reply, barely turning your head in his direction.

“Is that your regular?” He asks, gesturing to the drink in your hand.

“Maybe.”

“Why so secretive?” “Because I’m trying to leave.” You point out, gesturing to your entire body and its position angled away from him.

“I’m just trying to make conversation.” He defends, that hopeful smile still never leaving his face.

“About what?” You reply, slightly exasperated.

“About…” He trails off, looking thoughtful. “Ants.”

“Ants.” You deadpan, turning entirely to look him dead in the eyes. “You wanna talk about ants.”

“Yeah,” He replies, wincing at his topic of choice. “I wanna talk about ants.”

“Okay,” You answer simply, resting your drink on the table again. “What about them?”

“Well–there’s this question I’ve been thinking about for a while.”

“Hit me.” You say, raising an eyebrow.

“So you know how ants can carry fifty times their weight?”

“Yes?” You shift your weight to one foot, crossing your arms.

“Well...do you think a team of ants could carry off a human being?”

The silence between the two of you is deafening, and he shifts uncomfortably in his seat.

“I mean,” You finally say, sliding into the seat across from him, “How much does the average person weigh?”

“I have no idea,” He replies, smiling at the new addition to his table. You take a pensive sip of your coffee, thinking to yourself.

“Let’s say it’s a baby. Babies weigh, like, what? Seven pounds?” You hypothesize, fishing your cake out of your bag and breaking off a piece.

“Okay, a baby. How many ants would it take to carry one off?” He asks, and you raise both eyebrows.

“Do I look like a mathematician to you?”

“Okay, well,” He says, pulling out his phone and typing for a while. “The average ant weighs, at most, five milligrams.” “Which means it can carry 250 milligrams.”

“Who said you weren’t a mathematician?” He jokes, and you chuckle, shaking your head as you take another sip of your drink.

“Shush. How many milligrams is one pound?”

“Um…” He pauses, brows furrowed as he types some more in his phone. “453,592.”

“Okay, well, multiply that by seven.”

“Hold on…it’s 3,175,144.”

“Divide it by 250.”

“Are you sure you’re not a mathematician?” “Positive. I was always an English kind of girl–never a Math one.”

“The answer is 12,700.576.” He states triumphantly, turning his (very cracked) phone to face you.

“You should get a new phone.”

“It’s not that easy.”

“Why not?”

“Well, phones are expensive.”

“Ask your parents to buy it for you.” You say simply, confused, and he chuckles, raising his eyebrows.

“I wish it was that easy. It was expensive enough to get me to South Korea. I’ll stick with this phone for a while.”

“O...kay,” You reply, clearly not getting it.

“Let me guess: you grew up rich.”

“Maybe,” You snip defensively, and he laughs, raising his hands in surrender.

“Have you ever known struggle?”

Your brows furrow, offended, and you stand up, taking your drink in your hand.

“I’m struggling to understand why I graced you with my presence in the first place. Bye,” You huff, turning on your heel.

“Wait,” He says quickly, standing up and pushing the sketchbook into his bag. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Sure, you did.”

“I didn’t mean to offend you, it’s just–you’re kind of adorably clueless about the world outside of your rich little bubble.”

“And, yet, I’m offended.”

“I’m sorry,” He apologizes, sincerity in his eyes. You pause, regarding his contrite expression, and sigh, relaxing slightly.

“Everyone I talk to is rich,” You explain, and he smiles.

“Now that’s not true. Isn’t it good to get some diversity in your life?”

“Oh, shut up. I’m still leaving. I have places to be, poems to write, and naps to take.”

“Okay, mood.” He says, chuckling. When you start walking away, he follows you, slinging his bag over his shoulder. “So, you write poetry?” “Mm, yeah.”

“What do you like to write about?” “Nature, people–the usual stuff.”

“Any love poems?” He teases, and you scoff, pausing to look him in the eyes.

“I don’t do love.”

“What does that even mean?”

“Whatever you think it means.” You say dismissively, and he nods thoughtfully.

“Well, I’d love to read one of your poems someday.”

“You can buy it off the shelf like everyone else.” You joke, and he smiles widely.

“You wanna get published?”

“That’s the goal.”

“Well, I hope it works out for you.” He says sincerely, and you soften slightly, turning to smile at him.

“Thanks.”

“You’re welcome!” He chirps, holding the door for you as you leave the small cafe. “So, where you headed?”

“Home.”

“Can I walk you there?”

“I’m sure I can manage,” You reject him evasively, smiling politely.

“Well, yeah, but I want to.”

“That was a very polite no, Johnny.”

“Oh.” He says, frowning a bit. You’ve never been too concerned with people’s feelings, especially men’s, and you’re not about to start now, so you just keep walking in silence. Johnny, however, has not left your side.

“I said no,” You remind him, tone harsh.

He holds his hands up in surrender, stating, “I heard you. I’m walking home, too.”

“Oh.” You say, skeptical. “If you try anything, I’ll kill you.”

“Okay,” He acquiesces, falling into rhythm beside you. “So did you major in poetry?”

“English,” You specify. “Poetry was my concentration.”

“That’s cool. I majored in Photography and minored in Studio Art.”

“So when I told you to take a picture–you could have.”

“Say cheese.” He jokes, again, and groans at your expressionless face. “Oh, come on, that’s funny.”

“I didn’t laugh.” You point out, and he sighs deeply, bringing a hand to his chest in mock hurt.

“You’re killing me here.”

“Good. Maybe I can walk home in peace.” You say, a wry smile tugging at the corners of your mouth.

“Ouch,” He scoffs, and you laugh, much to his enjoyment.

“You have a pretty laugh.”

“Thanks.”

“Why are you so closed off?”

“What do you mean?” You ask, deliberately playing dumb.

“You’re so...dismissive.”

“Maybe I don’t want to talk to you. Did you ever think about that?” You say, a smile playing at the corners of your mouth.

“I don’t think that’s true.” He replies, but you cut him off before he can finish.

“This is me,” You say, gesturing to your house. He lets out a low whistle as he takes in the architecture.

“Nice place you’ve got there.”

“Thanks! See you around.”

“Looks like we’re neighbors,” He persists, and you hum noncommittally as you follow the direction of his hand with your gaze. “I live just down the block. Just moved in,” He states proudly, and you smile politely.

“Good for you. I’m gonna go now.”

“Wait!”

“What now,” You complain, already yearning for your bed.

“Can I have your number?” “I don’t give out my number.”

“But what if I need it for... neighborly purposes?” He presses, following after you up to your door.

“And what would constitute as a neighborly purpose?” You ask curiously, cocking your head in interest.

“I don’t know…” He says, trailing off to think of something. “What if I need a cup of sugar?” He asks as you unlock your front door and step inside. He comes up to the doorway, resting a hand on the frame and leaning closer to you. He smells of coffee and cinnamon, and your lips curl up into a catlike smile.

“Mm,” You hum thoughtfully, looking up at him and batting your lashes flirtatiously. “Then I guess,” You start, leaning closer, “You’re out of luck,” and shut the door in his face.

You kick off your shoes and hurry upstairs, tossing yourself on your bed and curling up with Toby and Muffin, dozing off almost instantly. Your nap is short-lived, as a ping from your phone wakes you up, followed by another–and another.

“God, what is it?” You mumble to yourself, picking up your phone and scrolling through your chats.

“I just want to love you,” Wheein cries, tackling you into a hug as soon as you open your door. You stagger back, laughing and hugging her back, resting your head on her shoulder.

“I love you, too.” You laugh, turning your head to kiss her cheek. The two of you curl up on your bed, cats in between the two of you, and grab your phones, scrolling through Instagram and occasionally showing each other funny memes. “Oh, hey, whatever happened to that journalism job you interviewed for?”

“I didn’t get it,” She replies with a tinge of sadness. “Turns out, the boss was a creep and thought I was hot. Came onto me super aggressively and wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

“Did you kick him in–”

“The balls? Why, yes, I did.”

“Good for you.”

“I hate that. That, like, overwhelming persistence.” She says with a shudder, shaking her head in distaste. She moves her head to rest on your stomach, and you play absentmindedly with her hair.

“God, me too.”

“Okay, but Jaehyun.”

“What about him?”

“He’s all over you–but I guess that’s because he can tell you’re into him.”

You sit up suddenly, sending Wheein flying. She sits up with a yelp and glares at you, with you glaring right back.

“I am not into him.”

“Sure, you’re not.” She says slowly, smiling knowingly.

“I’m not,” You insist petulantly, crossing your arms and huffing.

“Okay, baby.”

“Stop,” You whine, covering your face with your hands.

“Admit you love it, and I’ll stop.”

“Never.”

“So you’ll never admit that you love it?” She says, a mischievous smile toying at the corners of her mouth.

“Nope.”

“So you love it, but won’t admit it.” She teases triumphantly, grinning at you.

“I–what–no! I–you–oh, shut up.” You grouch, whacking her with a pillow. Her eyes flash with mischief, and she hits you back with your other pillow, sticking her tongue out at you.

Your eyes widen, and you hit her back, laughing when her hair flies everywhere.

“Do you really wanna do this?” She asks with a dangerous smile, and you smirk.

“Bring it on.”

Your bedroom is filled with shrieks and giggles as the two of you engage in a full-blown pillow fight, stopping only once you’ve exhausted yourselves. You collapse on the bed, chest heaving and cheeks flushed, still giggling.

“Oh, I forgot to tell you–I met my new neighbor.”

“Ooh, and?” She replies excitedly, waiting for the verdict.

“He’s the worst. Cute, but the worst. He asks so many questions.”

“Well, if you weren’t locked up tighter than a bank safe, maybe he wouldn’t have to.”

“You’re supposed to be on my side,” You groan, swatting her arm gently.

“You know I am, girl. I’m always on your side,” She assures you, taking your hand in hers.

“I love you,” You say with a smile, squeezing her hand.

“Can I quote you on that?”

“I’ll deny it.”

Your doorbell rings not a moment after you’ve gently ushered the girls out of your home, and Jaehyun’s standing there in sweats and a t-shirt, smirking at you.

“Hi,” You greet quickly, tugging him into your house by his jacket, pulling it off his shoulders. You hang it on the coat rack and thrust a bottle of soju into his hand, urging it to his lips. “Drink.”

“Hi, baby.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“I get to call you what I want when you text me in the middle of the night to come over.”

“I texted you so you could fuck me, and yet, here I am—unfucked.”

“I’m not even drunk yet,” He chuckles, drinking from the bottle you placed in his hand. He makes his way into your living room, plopping down on your couch as he chugs the bottle of soju, setting it down on the coffee table. You hand him another bottle before setting another one in front of him.

“Drink up,” You sing, sitting in the armchair by the couch and angling your body towards him.

“I’m drinking—I’m not trying to throw up.”

“Yeah, that’s not cute.” You agree, crossing your legs.

“Glad you see it my way.”

“Watch it, Jung.”

“Oh, I’m watching, baby.”

“Stop flirting and start drinking.”

“Awfully bossy for someone who needs help getting off.”

“I have a vibrator upstairs that could fuck me better than any man ever could.”

“Why don’t you go get it, then?”

“Because I don’t feel like it. Is that a problem for you?”

“Watch your attitude.”

“Either deal with my attitude, or fuck me like you mean it.” You retort, and he raises his eyebrows.

“I think you should shut that pretty little mouth of yours.” He says slowly, danger in his tone as he regards you. He finishes off the second bottle of soju and smacks his lips together loudly.

“I think you should come over here and shut it for me.”

“Bold words, considering you practically begged me to come here and fuck you.”

“I did not beg you.” You snap defensively.

“Oh, yeah?”

“Mhm.”

“You told me you needed me.” He teases, bringing the third bottle of soju to his lips and taking a swig. You watch his Adam’s apple move with unadulterated need in your eyes, not stopping even when he looks over at you curiously.

“I also told you I would call someone else if you didn’t hurry up.”

His eyes flash and you smile, reaching for your phone.

“I can text someone right now.”

He lunges at you, abandoning the bottle, and you twirl out of his reach.

“I have someone in mind, actually—”

He presses you against the wall, hands coming up to rest against the wall on either side of your head.

“If you even think about it—“ He dips down and breathes against your mouth, teasing your lips apart with his own. He smells of soju and mint, but you can’t honestly say that you mind.

“I am thinking about it. What now?”

“This is a very dangerous game.”

“Play with me, Jaehyun.” You pout, pulling at the strings of his sweats. He clenches his jaw and slips a hand down from the wall to grip your hip, tongue darting out to lick his lower lip. You breathe out slowly, lips curling into a smug smile as he rests his forehead on the wall by your head in frustration, his chest moving closer to your face.

You breathe in instinctively, inhaling his scent—a heady blend of his body wash, the faint smell of alcohol, and something entirely unique to him—and furrowing your brows in discomfort as something strange tugs at your insides, a heavy feeling settling in your stomach. “Jaehyun,” You hum, dragging out the syllables.

His entire body tenses for a moment before he’s pulling back to look at you, his eyes dark and unreadable.

“Yes?” It’s soft, delicate with a hint of danger, the stilled water of the ocean before a wave crashes over you both.

“You’re taking too long,” You pout, pushing him off of you and walking to your staircase, sitting down on a step and crossing your arms and legs with a huff. He raises an eyebrow at you with a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth before he walks towards you slowly, deliberately, his eyes fixed on yours.

He stops when he’s right in front of you, sinking down into a squat and watching you with pensive eyes. You observe him carefully, a smirk playing at the corners of your mouth as he reaches out and grazes a hand down your leg, bringing it to your ankle and lifting up your foot, inspecting your heel.

“I like these,” He remarks offhandedly, tracing the heel with a finger. He brings it up to draw a lazy circle around your ankle, and you shiver under the touch. He looks up at you, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, before his eyes harden and he’s wrapping his hand around your ankle, tugging you down the steps roughly until your legs are on either side of his. “You should keep them on.”

“Mm, yeah?” You purr, leaning forward to catch his waiting lips with your own, lips melding in a fuzzy fervor. “Whatever you want.” “That’s new.” He half-scoffs, lips brushing against yours as he speaks.

“Tonight, I’m yours.”

“Scratch that tonight, and this would be even better.” He hums, lips dotting kisses across the column of your neck.

“You can’t get everything you want,” You reply, craning your head to the side to allow him better access. His hands move to your hips, slipping under your shirt as he runs his fingers against the soft flesh. You decide enough is enough and pull back, standing up on the stairs. He watches you in interest as you strip yourself of your jeans, dropping them on the step above you and leaving you in nothing but a shirt, a bra, and your underwear—and, of course, your heels.

“Come here,” He pats his lap, and you comply, straddling his waist. He teases your lips with his own, hands sliding up and down your back. He grips your ass firmly, rutting your hips against his. You moan out, and he slots his lips with yours, kissing you feverishly. His tongue chases your own, flicks at it playfully, before sucking on your tongue gently.

“Fuck, baby girl,” He groans into your mouth, biting your lower lip and tugging at it roughly. He smacks your ass, the slap resounding through the living room. “I needed this.”

“Take me,” You moan, and he gasps in response, a hand pulling your hair so your head tilts back. He drags his teeth along your neck as he hurries to lift your shirt, unclipping your bra and pulling the two garments off of you before caressing your back, pushing your body into his face. He nuzzles into the valley between your breasts before pressing soft kisses to the skin, licking at the mound of flesh before sucking a hardened bud into his mouth. He sucks eagerly, swirling his tongue around the nub and chuckling when you hiss in satisfaction, arching your back and pushing your chest into him.

“I want you right here,” He grunts from around your nipple, teeth dragging against your skin.

“You can have me any way you want, baby.” You toss your head back as his fingers find their way to your clit, massaging the sensitive bud in quick circles. His free hand kneads at your ass, gripping the flesh so hard, you’re sure he’ll leave marks. You’re so caught up in the intoxicating way he rolls his hips against yours that you don’t even notice his fingers slipping under the fabric to dip into your heat.

“You’re so wet, baby. Who is this for, hm? Who got you so worked up?” He taunts, fingers dipping in and out of your heat slowly. His rhythm is tantalizing, his strokes sending blissful heat throughout your body, pooling in your stomach.

“You, Jaehyun,” You breathe against his lips, connecting with him in an electrifying kiss. He teases your lower lip, sucking it gently as his fingers stroke you closer to the edge of your climax. He runs his tongue over your lips, parting the seam as you gasp at the curl of his fingers.

“Only me?”

“Only you.”

“Good,” He murmurs, smiling into the kiss. “Take these off,” He tugs at your underwear and you make work of pulling them off. You’re breathy and a bit giggly as his hands slide up your sides, tickling softly. You bite his lip playfully as you maneuver them off your legs, moving to slingshot them across the room. He catches your wrist before you can, kissing the back of your hand before letting you continue, the pale pink garment flying across the room before landing on the couch.

“You know,” You hum, fingers walking a trail up his arm, “I let a model tie me up and fuck me on that couch once.”

“You really like to run your mouth, don’t you?” He growls, yanking you forward with a sudden jerk of his arms.

“Absolutely,” You coo, biting your lip coyly. “What are you gonna do about it?”

His eyes flash indignantly and he fists your hair, sinking his teeth into your neck as he bites down hard. You hiss in pain and pull back, slapping his arm. Growling in response, he reaches out for you, hands relentless against your repeated slaps. He manages to wrestle you down to the floor, pinning your arms above your head and kissing you desperately, rolling his tongue against yours. He ruts his hips into your core wantonly, grinding with slow, deliberate movements.

“You like that, don’t you, baby?” He grunts into your mouth, gathering your wrists in one hand and using the other to knead at your breast eagerly, skillfully kneading the soft flesh.

“Yes, fuck, yes,” You moan, and he chuckles, tweaking your nipple between his fingers.

“Gonna fuck you so good,” He pants, reaching down to free his cock from his sweatpants and boxers. “Gonna fuck you better than that model ever could.”

“Are you jealous?” You coo teasingly, bringing your hips up to meet his and eliciting a delicious moan from him. “I texted you, remember?”

“‘M not jealous,” He grunts, dipping his head down to kiss your breasts.

“You are.” You say with a smile, nudging his forehead with your chin. He looks up at you, and you pause. “It’s cute.”

“Not cute,” He gasps when your thigh finds his cock, rubbing against the throbbing length. He bites down on your nipple gently, and you let out a hum of satisfaction, moving your thigh against him slowly.

He adjusts himself so his cock is nestled between your legs and grinds down desperately, his cock sliding between your slick folds.

“Baby girl, that feels so good,” He moans, rutting his hips against you faster. Every so often, his tip hits your clit, and you cry out in pleasure, fingers curling on air.

“Let me go,” You gasp, struggling against his hand, frustrated whimpers leaving your lips.

“Are you gonna try and hit me again?” He pants, a bead of sweat trickling down his temple as he rolls his hips into you. You shake your head vigorously, and he raises an eyebrow. “Don’t lie to me.”

“I’m not,” You assert, kneeing him insistently. He quickens his pace, cock twitching between your folds. He curses softly, in awe as your back arches and you cry out his name, the tight spring coiled in your stomach coming loose with a snap.

“But you look so pretty pinned down like this—at my mercy. I don’t want to let you go.” He says after you’ve come down, hips still slowly stuttering against yours.

“Please?” You ask breathlessly, and his brows shoot up so high, you’d swear they’d disappeared. “Pretty please?” You coo, brushing your lips against his.

“How could I say no to you? Especially when you asked so nicely.” He murmurs, releasing you. You push him off of you, hurriedly situating yourself above his length and pumping him a couple of times in preparation.

Your moans melt together, liquid gold evaporating into the soft air, as you sink down onto his cock. He stares in awe at the junction of your hips, at his length buried inside of you before groaning in ecstasy and laying back on the floor, hands sliding up your thighs to your hips.

“Ride me, baby girl.” He purrs, giving your ass a quick slap. You shake your head, dropping down to rest on his shoulder. “Need a minute?”

“Yeah,” You gasp, walls slowly stretching to accommodate his girth. “Fuck, you’re bigger than I remembered.”

“We fucked a couple days ago.” He says slowly, trying to contain his smirk.

“Shut up, I’m not trying to stroke your ego,” You gasp, finally stretched out enough for him. “I’m ready,” You mumble, lids sliding shut from the full feeling in your abdomen.

“Good—now I can give you what you’ve been begging for.” He replies in a grunt as he lifts your hips, sliding out and pushing back into you with a snap of his hips.

You meet his hips with yours, clenching around his length greedily, and he moans, a breathless sound puffed from his lungs without control. You put your hands on his shoulders and focus on keeping yourself steady as he fucks into you hungrily, cock pulsing within your walls.

“Fuck, you feel so good,” He grunts, leaning forward to kiss you. Your lips meet in a messy, teeth clashing and clicking, tongues swirling, gasping and moaning kiss.

He thrusts into you slowly, repositioning himself so he’s propped up with one arm behind him and uses his now free hand to grasp at your breast, kneading the flesh and gently flicking his thumb over your nipple.

Between pumps, his hand roams your body freely, cupping your breast, gripping your hip, grabbing at your ass and even coming up to slip two fingers in your mouth. You suck on his fingers as he pushes the digits into your mouth, coating his slender fingers in your saliva. He brings his wet digits to your clit, rubbing in quick circles as your high approaches.

“I’m gonna come, Jae,” You pant, nails digging into his shoulder. He hisses and speeds up his thrusts, the circles on your clit becoming more deliberate. Fire pools in your abdomen, flames licking your skin as you climax, burying your face in his neck with a muffled whine. You bite his shoulder gently and he rubs your back soothingly, pressing soft kisses to your neck and shoulders.

He slows his thrusts, movements jerky before he pushes you onto your back, quick to hover over you and resume pumping in and out of you. His fingers find your clit again, and you cry out from the overwhelming feeling of the sensitive bud being abused. “Jaehyun, I already came—stop,” You gasp, biting your lip in an attempt to stop the moans from flooding out.

“I’m just giving you what you want, baby,” He purrs, leaning over and pressing his lips to yours, swallowing your moans. “Isn’t this what you wanted? To come? That’s why you called me here, isn’t it?” His lips resting against yours as he fucks into you, teasing you relentlessly.

“Jaehyun, please? Please, please, please, I can’t come again.” You stutter out, half warning him, half pleading with him.

“Sure, you can, baby. You’re so good for me, begging so pretty like that, I know you can come again.” He coos teasingly, pushing you over the edge for yet another climax. Your back arches under him as your vision is bathed in white light, the warmth flooding through your body as white noise rushes in your ears, the only discernible sound being your heartbeat pounding dully in rhythm with the throbbing of his cock.

You’re distantly aware of Jaehyun releasing into you, your consciousness somewhere monumental and far away. He comes with a mixture of a growl and a groan as his blunt fingernails bite into your hips, curses and your name leaving his lips. His cum paints your inner walls, warm and sudden, and you moan out when he stills before pulling out of you.

He all but collapses on top of you, expelling the air from your lungs in a soft “oof.”

“Sorry,” He chuckles, and you laugh, shaking your head.

“Don’t worry about it.” You puff softly, reaching up to run your fingers through his hair. He hums gently and wraps his arms around you, only for you to push him off.

“We’re not cuddling.” You huff, pushing him off with a smile. He leans down, puckering his lips and making loud kissy noises as his face nears yours. You groan in disgust and push his face away, laughing when he returns, louder than before. “Stop!”

“You don’t mean that,” He reasons, thumb swiping at your lower lip. He leans down again, faster than you can process, and pecks you on the lips, smiling widely. He pulls you in for another kiss, pressing his lips to your face repeatedly, dotting kisses just around your mouth and cheeks.

“Don’t do that!” You yelp, attempting to push him off to no avail. He pins your arms down and kisses your lips repeatedly, occasionally nipping your lower lip.

“Stop,” You say, voice something between a whine and a giggle. “We’re done kissing for the night.”

“Yeah?” He asks, nuzzling into your neck and pressing his lips to your skin. “Are you sure?” He muses, lips traveling up to suck at your earlobe.

“Mm,” You hum, smiling as he mouths shamelessly at your neck, hands sliding up to cup your breasts. “You can’t honestly be ready to go again.”

“Maybe I am,” He teases, pressing his already half-hard length to your thigh.

“No fucking way,” You breathe, craning your head to get a better look. Sure enough, he’s at half-mast, tip red and leaking pre-cum already.

“I don’t think I can go again,” You murmur tiredly, biting your lip as you shake your head.

“Sure, you can, baby.” He grunts, mouthing deliberately at your throat. “Just take,” He lines himself up with your entrance again, “My,” He pushes his tip into you amidst your gasp, “Cock,” He sighs, content, as he pushes into you.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” You whimper, biting down on his shoulder.

“You take my cock so well,” He praises, thrusting into you slowly, hands sliding up your sides and down your arms to lock fingers with you, lacing his fingers with yours and bringing them to rest above your head. He moves his hips in slow, sinful movements, rutting against you deliberately. “So good for me,” He breathes, and you exhale softly.

“Right there, Jaehyun,” You drag your nails lightly up his back and curl your fingers in the hair on the nape of his neck. He whines and drives into you more determinedly, thrusts still slow and languid. “You feel so good.” “I want you to come again,” He grunts, biting at your lower lip. He sits up and grasps at your hips, intently fucking into your clenching core. “Can you do that for me?”

“Do I have a choice?” You chuckle breathlessly, and he laughs, dimples poking into his cheeks.

“No.”

“Thought so.”

He has the nerve to giggle, and your chest twists strangely and unfamiliarly. Your hand moves and comes to rest on his chest, curling in on itself.

“Take your shirt off,” You whine, tugging at the hem, and he does, tossing the fabric behind him as he leans down to kiss you.

“Anything you want, baby.” He breathes, pumping into you languidly, “Anything for you.”

You do your best to ignore the sincerity in his voice and instead focus on how well his length stretches your walls, the delicious stretch welcoming. He hooks one arm around your leg, pulling it up to his shoulder and angling his body towards it, the new position clouding your senses.

“Fuck,” You curse softly, running your fingers through your hair.

“You like that?” He pants, gaze smoldering, fixing your body in place.

“Yeah,” You agree, nodding vigorously as you clutch at his hips. He reaches a hand down to rub slow circles into your clit, and your hips jerk at the sensation.

“Can you come again, baby?” He murmurs, circling your clit more insistently. “I don’t know if I can hold off much longer.”

“Yes,” You sigh, a lazy smile on your face. “I’m gonna come.”

“Good.” He half-pants, half-grunts, swiveling his hips as his cock throbs inside of you. “Come for me.”

Your high approaches, and you clench your fingers, moans, curses, and Jaehyun’s name falling from your lips repeatedly. You sing his name like a mantra, grounding you as you bask in the feeling of floating away. Your walls tighten around him as he releases into you with a drawn out groan, the sound practically music to your ears. Your core milks his length greedily, clenching and relaxing around him repeatedly as he shudders from the overstimulation. He pulls out of you and lies down next to you, panting slightly into the oddly comfortable silence.

“And you said we were done kissing for the night.” He teases, nudging your arm. You look over at him with a glare that’s met with a mischievous grin.

“One more kiss?”

“No,” You deadpan, and he pouts at you.

“Please?”

“No!”

“Pretty please?”

“No.”

“Fine,” He huffs, his pout deepening. You roll your eyes and lean over, kissing his cheek. “You call that a kiss?” He grins teasingly, but the dusted rosy tint atop his ears tells a different story.

“Oh, come on.”

“That’s not a real kiss!” He objects, and you scoff.

“You don’t get to be picky.”

“Sure I do. I just made you come, what, four times?”

“Fine.” You grouch, turning and kissing him briefly. He catches the back of your head, slotting your lips with his and sucking gently on your lower lip.

Against your will, your hand finds his hair, a soft moan leaving your lips as he parts your lips with his tongue. He moans back, licking at your tongue gently before pulling away, his lips glistening.

You take a minute to catch your breath, chest pounding, as he smiles at you shyly.

“Now, that’s a kiss.”

“Yeah,” You breathe, a smile coming to the corners of your lips.

“So...”

“Don’t make small talk,” You’re quick to say, and he just laughs, shaking his head.

“I was gonna say good night.”

“What?”

“Good night! I’ll head home now that you’re satisfied,” He replies simply, but something about his tone and his words rubs you the wrong way, so you frown.

“Well—I mean—It’s late.” You say, struggling to find the words.

“Yeah, it is,” He affirms, a smile toying at the corners of his mouth.

“And you definitely can’t drive now.”

“No, I can’t. I could take an Uber, though.” He offers, the smile widening.

“Well, you’d just have to come back later and get your car, so—”

“What are you trying to say?” He cuts you off, grinning from ear to ear.

“You can...I guess...maybe...spend the night.” You finally manage to mumble, sitting up and avoiding his eyes.

“I’d love to,” He assures you, sitting up next to you and beaming at you.

“It’s not because I want you to.”

“Right.”

“It’s just the most practical option.”

“Of course.” He agrees with a smug smile.

“So don’t get any ideas.”

“You got it.”

“And wipe that smug look off your face.”

“Wiping.” He giggles, swiping his hand over his face to reveal a serious expression. You bite back a laugh and stand up, cringing when a mix of your releases trickles down your thigh.

“That’s so hot,” He says, eyeing your core with hooded eyes.

“Shut up,” You snip, before moving to collect your clothing from the floor.

“Shutting up,” He acquiesces, raiding his arms in surrender. He stands up, too, pulling his sweats and boxers back up and stooping to pick up his shirt.

“Want me to take the couch?”

“No, you can...sleep in my bed.” You say slowly, in disbelief at the words coming out of your mouth.

“Okay,” He grins at you again, a boyish, innocent smile.

“I mean, you let me sleep in yours the day we first fucked.”

“That I did,” He muses, expression pensive.

“Okay, don’t get sappy on me. Get your clothes and get upstairs.”

“Ooh, I love it when you take control,” He jokes, stepping closer to you. You step back with a half-amused, half-annoyed scoff and walk over to your couch, plucking your underwear from the surface and resting the bundle of clothes in your arms on the couch. You pull on your underwear and the shirt, cringing yet again at the feeling of the fabrics against your sticky skin.

“Follow me,” You say, picking up your clothes and breezing by him. He follows you up the stairs and into your bedroom, where he places his shirt on the end table at the foot of your bed. “I’m showering first.”

“What if we showered together?” He offers, grinning mischievously. He follows you to the bathroom door and wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. “Saving water is good for the planet, you know.”

You shut the door in his face.

“Hey, not nice!” He calls through the door, and, alone and safely, you giggle.

You compose yourself before opening the door and staring him dead in the eyes.

“I’m not nice,” You deadpan, and you shut the door again.

After emerging from the bathroom, you’re greeted with Jaehyun reclined on your bed, scrolling through his phone.

“Your turn to shower,” You say, and he gives you a once-over before slowly standing up and making his way over to you. In nothing but a fluffy towel with wet hair and no makeup, something about you sets Jaehyun off, and he backs you into the door of the bathroom.

“Do you wanna...” He trails off, tugging at the towel with a teasing grin, “Sit on my face?”

“You’re kidding.” You scoff in disbelief, eyes widening as his tugs get more insistent. “Stay back, you demon.”

“No demon here—just a guy who would do anything to get his head between your legs.”

“You’re an animal.”

“It didn’t seem to bother you earlier.”

“Shut up and go shower,” You huff, pushing him away and moving towards your dresser. He barely budges (damn his strength), so you have to squeeze by him, your chest brushing against his. Your nipples stiffen after brushing against the fabric of the towel, and you fight the urge to roll your eyes.

“If you say so,” He sings softly, trailing his hand down your back before jumping back when you spin around with murderous eyes. “I’m getting in the shower,” He laughs, stepping into the bathroom and cracking the door, “You can join me if you’d like.”

You scoff, shaking your head in disbelief as you pick out a pair of black underwear and a simple white t-shirt, pulling both on before crawling into bed and plugging your phone in to charge. You think for a moment and lean over the other edge of the bed, plugging your spare charger into the outlet for Jaehyun.

By the time he comes out the shower, you’re half asleep, fingers still loosely curled around your phone. He gently plucks it from your fingers, placing it on the nightstand before climbing into the bed beside you and plugging his phone in to charge.

“Good night, baby.” He mumbles tiredly, and through your daze, you reply sleepily with your most used four words.

“Don’t call me that.”

I hope you enjoyed! thank you for reading, and please leave feedback; it means the world to me!

[thotantics]

Hey hey heyyy!! I'm here for the kink ship✌️ (btw so happy you're back!) i'm more on the submissive side, although I'm a switch lol i really like teasing people to get then riled up but get really shy with punishments 👉👈 i also enjoy being mandhandled, creampies, power play and degradation! but also? praises?? idk man iss a whole lot lmaoo i also really need someone who shows me they care after bc i'm a sensitive baby 😳 the groups i like are monsta x, got7 and nct! thank you so much!!!

im happy too 😭 ty for playing w me! so like right away my knee jerk reaction to this once i saw the groups u like were in this order

Jinyoung!!!! first and foremost like hes UR GUY! 😩

then instantly thought of Jaehyun

and Minhyukie!! 😌

as for WHY, the biggest thing was degradation with lots of praise and loads of aftercare!! the whole thing screams Jinyoung to me like if im gonna write smut for him right this second, all the elements u mentioned would have to take place with him its just exactly how i see him 🤧💕

Jaehyun as well, i think hes a switch but dom leaning (hyuk too!) and definitely into power play and loves a good cat and mouse game leading up to sex where u just tease him until he can't stand it any longer and puts u in ur place (on ur knees mayhaps 😭)

I nearly said Kihyun for u but changed my mind after some more thought to Minhyuk!! 😳 hes a wild card for me tbh, my elusive almost-bias. sigh. but i think he'd have SO MUCH FUN w someone like u!! def a switch, def a tease who can take as much teasing as he dishes out, i can see him being big on cumplay and creampies and yeh 😌💕💕