#it IS however fun to say that i am in a parasocial relationship with an old(er) man who died 300 years ago. actually it's peak comedy

[nebusokuxp]

"Why are so many people in the minecraft community bad people?"

WARNING: THIS POST CONTAINS TALK OF POWER DYNAMICS, ABUSE, SA, ETC

This has become a fairly popular question. Whether it be a joke to poke fun at the ridiculous amount of minecraft youtubers who are awful people or a genuine curiosity.

Now I dont have all the answers. I am not saying I do. But I think I have a couple of answers. None of them are clear-cut, and I think they blend together. So, let's begin

1. It's a kids game.

Predators flock towards spaces with children. And games for children will be a Hotspot. Especially something like minecraft that had a massive ressurgance in 2020. This happens all the time, both online and offline. Disgusting people using children's products to hide their pedophilia.

2. The world is full of awful people.

The internet is a Russian roulette of fame. It doesn't matter how good your content is. Fame happens randomly and sparcely. When your content is good, you can graple onto the game and harness it. However, with something as fickle as a random chance, you're bound to get some weirdos and degenerates. And in a community as large as minecraft, it isn't surprising stuff like this is happening.

3. We don't know them

I've seen a lot of people act betrayed and shocked when bad information about their favorite CC comes out. And as much as I do, I get the sadness that comes with it. It's a bit ridiculous. What they are doing on that screen is not them. It is a performance, a show for our entertainment. With editing and practice, they can formulate an entirely different identity. So, for those acting, how we could've seen any of this coming. We couldn't, but we can learn to not attatch ourselves to people we don't know.

ENDING THOUGHTS

Sure, I liked Wilbur Soot's content. But guess what? He's not my friend or my good buddy. So , just stop listening and paying attention. In the end, the internet is an echo chamber of parasocial relationships and bad decisions made since we see ourselves as above consequences when behind a screen. So my parting advice is to stop living through the internet. See reality. Because you're gonna realise how fucked up your perception really is.

[putschki1969]

Hello beautiful Sarah, I would like to ask you an unusual question. Today I want to ask your opinion on what you think about people who fall in love with their artists. In this case, let's talk about the Kalagirls. I tell you that I have never dated anyone nor do I pay attention to people in that sense (if I explain myself) but when I was 16 years old in 2016 I began to notice how charming Miss Wakana is, what attracted me the most to her. It was that beautiful smile, I feel that she is a person with beautiful feelings and I like her not only physically but also as a person because of the little she lets us know about her life, I like how fun she is, I like that. She fights for her dreams, I like that she loves nature and animals, etc. She is very charming. It must be very nice to know her or work with someone like her. Maybe it seems ridiculous to you but that's how I feel and I know that unfortunately I will never be with her but I am happy for all the good things that happen to her and I always wish her the best. Sorry for telling you this, maybe I'm boring you hehe, I just want to know your opinion about the fools in love with their singers.

Hi there anon! No worries, you are fine! You are not boring me at all. Sorry it took me so long to write this reply, the past few weeks have been crazy.

Hikaru's Q&A video from earlier today finally motivated me to make this post. One of the questions she received was from a fan who proclaimed to love Keiko and they wanted to get some advice from Hikaru on what to do in such a situation. The topic immediately reminded me of your ask which was still in my drafts.

I personally struggle to relate to this particular feeling since I am not the type of person to fall in love with someone else. I have never been romantically interested in anyone and I most likely never will be, I just don't have that particular desire within me to connect with someone on that level (and that's coming from someone who is getting closer and closer to the big 4-0 XD). Of course that's not to say that I don't love the girls with all my heart. As we all know, I am very much devoted to them. But I guess I am doing it in a very detached manner.

Generally speaking, I think it's perfectly fine to love an artist (or rather, the idea we have created in our minds of said artist) and to feel some sort of attraction towards them. Looking up to our idols and aspiring to be like them can bring out the best in us and make us better people. It can become problematic however, if the emotional attachment is too strong to a point where the fan no longer knows their boundaries. If a fan starts wanting too much or showcases an intense possessive attitude, I don't think that's a normal behaviour anymore. The issue of parasocial relationships comes into play here, I have actually talked about that topic a few months ago.

I will say though that it is a very common thing for teenagers and young adults in particular to have crushes on "celebrities". It's pretty much a part of growing up and most people eventually grow out of it so I don't think we should outright condemn those feelings. As long as the person knows where to draw the line and recognises that there's no chance they can ever have a relationship with their crush, it should be no problem in my opinion. I am not sure this is what you wanted to hear, hopefully I didn't discourage you. Your feelings seem genuine and it sounds like you do not overstep any boundaries so there's nothing to worry about.

Last but not least, we should all try to follow Hikaru's advice. The best thing you can do if you love an artist is to support them with all your might. So let's all continue to do that

＼（○＾ω＾○）／＼（○＾ω＾○）／＼（○＾ω＾○）／

[starrierknight]

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[starburstfloat]

TXT ASM BULACAN RECAP:

still wrapping my head around the last 48 hours it's been a surreal experience! To think that a week ago I debated cancelling my trip because i was so anxious thinking about how large crowds make me panic and I didn't think I could handle this. Wow I am so glad I pushed through and went ahead with it because once I arrived at the venue the crowd wasn't at all an anxiety factor. Filipino moa are so incredibly kind enthusiastic and fun! I can't find enough nice words to say about everyone I met last night, be it waiting in line, taking photos for each other, exchanging freebies and photocards, navigating the venue together, and of course enjoying the concert together. Yeonjun was absolutely loving the crowd and he kept mentioning that they were the best among the entire tour and judging from fancams and having attended the Seoul concert myself I can definitely agree LOL no one can compete with filo moa!

I ended up sitting next to two middle aged women who were yeonjun stans and they were like "people think it's weird cause we're older than them but they (txt) remind me of my nephews and they feel like sons to me" and it made me want to say thank you someone gets it!!!! Fangirl love is much more than the reductionist love people assume fangirls have for boy bands. love and admiration come in so many forms and it's beautiful.

My favorite moments were the interactive moments they had with the crowd in between stages. They had a moment where they had the crowd copy what they were doing and saying, and soobin made moa shout "SOOBIN! You're a HOT GUY!" and it made all the members laugh. Kai had us say "Kai you're the best skrrrrrt" and everyone burst out laughing when the crowd did the skrrt part, like beomgyu genuinely lost it ahahahaha

Taehyun wasn't in the best condition unfortunately. it wasn't anything noticeable from an audience perspective but things started looking a bit off when he ran backstage twice during the ments of the other members. At first we thought he was just getting his in ear fixed, but when he disappeared a second time we were wondering what was up. He also looked pretty tired, and mentioned at the end of the concert that he felt a bit regretful because he wasn't feeling too great. However based on his vocals and dance I couldn't tell anything was off at all, like he has such a powerful voice and stage presence and it sucks knowing he didn't feel great :(

Kai and Beomgyu stole the show for me! I am absolutely bias wrecked by the birthday boy. He can belt some notes like damn. How do they do that?? Especially during blue hour and cysm when they're jumping so much for the chorus.

Can I just say I think soobin and I have a spiritual introvert connection cause seeing him being his usual awkward self on stage, shy from all the cheering and attention, and just generally being a bit of a dork, I felt this primal need to hug the guy and say SAME BESTIE

That kind of sums up the night - I felt like I was watching a group of friends who I met in college get up on stage and do some amazing shit but then chat with the crowd like they were on a stand up comedy skit. I think that's what I love so much about txt: they feel like your average silly dudes (dare I say a group of gay guys who you feel safe around or will that trigger the hetero fans lol) who then turn around after being all playful and unserious and pull off an incredibly professional and stellar show!

People can say what they want about parasocial relationships, but having this kind of connection with an artist is truly special and unforgettable. I've never experienced a concert like this where there was such a strong feedback loop of the fans giving the artist love and energy and them equally delivering it right back to us. It was a neverending cycle the whole night. The venue was so full of love, and I don't think I've laughed and smiled as much as I did yesterday in literal months. My heart feels so at ease.

[placeinthisworld]

I guess this is personal but my last fight with my ex started because of TS, of all things. She says I'm miserable and normal fans say they like this album and move on, but I don't because I listen to her but don't like her actions. Idk I guess so many of our love songs were based on Joe's (fave by far, you will always be famous) and it's another side of parasocial relationship Ik but yeah. I agree with your takes and feel you on the disillusionment. Btw can you talk about lavender at Sbux yet o

honestly it’s hard when someone you love/ admire / respect doesn’t live up to your expectations, so i understand why you would be upset with her. i definitely am. i think because we’re so aware about what songs ts wrote with or about joe, it’s hard to still love them now that we know that they’re no longer together. it’s difficult, i used to listen to “sweet nothing (string version)”every morning at work but if it comes on shuffle now i just have to skip it bc it makes me feel just a little too sad still ☹️ it’s hard to separate her personal life from the songs sometimes, and that parasocial dynamic i think really fucks us up. this is not taylor exclusive either- i feel like halsey and taylor share a lot of similarities lmao 💀 i used to listen to the stripped version of “so good” every morning too but now it also makes me sad ☹️

and hhaha yesss well i can’t talk about how it tastes yet bc my store hasn’t received it yet.

putting under the cut bc starbucks is a controversial topic still (understandably. however this is quite literally my job so)

so it looks like it’s another powder (rip us baristas) and it’ll be advertised as an iced lavender oatmilk latte (w blonde espresso ofc), a lavender cream frappachino (no coffee!), and a foam w the sweet cream. featured drink is iced lavender cream ostmilk matcha!! (just a matcha w the lavender foam w sweet cream).

i’m transferring stores after next week, so hopefully one of my locations gets our shipment in soon!! one of my baristas actually brought in the monin lavender flavored syrup for fun until we do, so maybe i’ll mess around tomorrow morning and try to make one to see how sbux lavender powder tastes in comparison!

[fandomfluffandfuck]

the way you’re so onboard with alba just shows that you’re most likely a white person who doesn’t care about nazism and racism. y’know, cuz those things don’t affect you, right?

btw your “angel” posted her own nudes on ig for everyone, including chris’ underage nieces, to see. glad to know that’s who you’re supporting.

check your privilege please

related to this

Normally, I don't engage in stuff like this for a variety of reasons... anon critique and/or hate tends to be motivated purely to solicit a reaction, yet there's only a small chance the person that sent this will actually ever see (or read, for that matter) my response, I'm not a gossip blog, nor am I the place people come for hard-hitting discussions on issues like racism, antisemitism, homophobia/transphobia, sexism, misogyny, ableism, or any of the other awful human-made categories of hate that plague us. I'm a fantasy blog--hence the fact that I do fictional as well as real person ships. But, I do occasionally post stuff about the real lives of the people that I include in this fantasy blog--that's what the tag "real life real people" is. It's for others to filter if they want. That's why I tag those kinds of posts in such a way. (Alba is also always tagged, filter that way, too, if you like). I occasionally post that kind of stuff because sometimes, it's fun to post about the real lives of these people I have a parasocial relationship to. And its fun to have somewhere for people to express their excitement of/for those people. Personally, I'm much more partial to allowing excitement than negativity. It's my space, I do curate it extensively.

That being said, yes, I'm white. I'm a man, and I'm mostly straight-passing unless I deliberately out myself to others. I have a lot of privileges. I won't and don't deny that.

Nor will I deny that I haven't done really any research on Alba--the tags for her and Chris these days are nearly always full of hate or extensive theories when I check them, so... I avoid them. It's my peragotive to mostly stay out of the tags, though. I know that. I don't know Alba. For that fact, I don't know Chris. All I have to go off of is appearances. I do hope they're happy. They're just people. I also hope she's not still saying the awful, harmful things she has in the past--leaning to your side, and assuming that there are receipts. I hope she's listening and learning.

As far as posting her nudes to her Instagram--she's a grown woman. It's her body, her account, and the internet has always had places that are unsafe for children. She doesn't control who follows her, and she's famous. Many people follow her. I don't assume she wanted children to stumble across those photos. And if they did, that truly sucks. Children being unwantedly exposed to sexual content is not to be taken lightly. I can see how damaging that might be (God knows I've had a shit ton of experiences like that myself, from my younger years with even less protections on social media) even while holding the overarching opinion that bodies are bodies and nudity shouldn't be so sexualized as it is in our puritanical society. Although, yes, of course, nude photos intended to be sexually charged are much different to bodies being bodies.

While I'm very unsure that you will see this, let alone read it, I will conclude this post saying that this is as much as I want to post about this: I understand the underlying frustration you have, and I hear you. I do. I could--I can do much more to be a better ally as a white man to dismantling racist systems and holding racist people accountable. I am always trying, truly. However, for the purpose of this blog, I don't want to engage further.

Thank you.

[the1975attheirverybest]

"One thing about Matty is that he knows that we as fans love him." This is actually something I've been thinking about all year and I hope I won't be offending anybody (this isn't meant to attack you or any of your lovely followers/ anons) And this might just be me projecting/ being way too parasocial myself so apologies if this is too negative. I really don't mean to make anybody feel bad but I really wonder if Matty didn't experience some sort of disconnect with the fans this year. Fan culture/ concert etiquette has changed a lot. We already know that going viral on TikTok and thus becoming more famous has been hard on him. He's expressed nonstop that it bothers him that so many fans film during their entire gigs - AND keep trying to provoke some kind of reaction out of him so they can go viral. People have been following the band around and stalking him personally, he's even been doxxed. Then ofc he got this extreme amount of backlash when he went on the podcast and people screaming for him to apologize/ apologize the way they personally seemed best (not saying people's feelings and criticisms weren't valid but I think we can all agree that it was very intense and lacked nuance), then we got very extreme reactions to him dating TS. And while our fans were much kinder/ more supportive, there was a loud majority complaining that we would "lose him" now cause he surely wouldn't be allowed to behave a certain way/ a loud majority trying to trivailize what happened ("Oh well, they were never gonna last, they're too different"/ "Let's be real, it was just sex. They can't have possibly been in love") and I feel that's pretty patronizing? We actually don't know what he felt for her/ hoped for or how it affected him to be dropped so publicly/ unceremoniously. Next we had a lot of fans immediately side w/ Rina when she shamed him in front of his whole industry at a festival he's been hoping to headline his whole life, fueling the same discussions/ outcries for him to apologize (same disclamer as above), Malaysia after-math, fans constantly begging for more social media posts but then getting offended/ finding fault in his posts (same disclamer as above) and even accusing him of predatory behavior because he possibly interacted with underage fans... Fans making up all sorts of rumors about him on twitter "for fun", believing Deuxmoi, accusing him of being in a PR/ fake relationship, complaining about ticketing/ tour dates, getting all anxious and worked up before the start of SATVB, expressing dread instead of excitement for the new show and begging him to "shut up, stop your bits and just sing" (same disclamer as above) fans being rude/ talking over him while he's doing his speeches/ performance art (and I also think he's pretty disappointed that people aren't really "getting it"), fans being so weird and grabby that he decided he doesn't feel comfortable taking off his shirt any longer, constant complaining about his hair/ facial hair, constant complaining about how much he interacts with the audiences, fans having the audacity to complain that he was sick/ tired/ emotional during certain performances... the list goes on and on. Again, sorry if this is all very negative and probably too parasocial (and way too long) but I felt really disheartened at all the negativity and entitlement this year. It was a very hard year for him and whenever I go through a hard time I am much more sensitive/ tend to feel unloved if criticised (however justified). I really hope he still feels loved and like we're "getting him".

No you’re right. Idk I always wonder how he feels because there are moments when he seems to think that things aren’t as serious as they are (like the Twitter backlash) and times when he seems to know very well what the conversation within the fandom is.

I think he gets it. (Tempted to uno reverse his own words and say “he gets us.”) because as much as he’s seen stupid / toxic fan behavior he’s also seen real fandom. Like the Vienna show fans who held up “you are loved” signs and he thanked them for it. And then the fan who asked him “how are you? Like how are you, really??” And he said it was sweet but not to worry. And he always says “we love you guys and we’re still us, we’re still here” etc. and crying cuz he saw a fan cry. I think he experiences both extremes. And it must be a lot and confusing to process because yeah people love you but then there are those who do so for all the wrong reasons and how do you separate those and when do you engage or disengage. Which is why I don’t blame him when he gets a bit defensive or whatever. Bless him.

Not to be weird and start drama but I felt his presence in the room (tell me why I sound like I’m talking about a ghost) at the Baltimore show. Which he said was the best show they’d done. And I genuinely think it’s because we didn’t have that many phones out etc. he and I interacted a couple times so he definitely sees, appreciates, and engages with those fans who are genuinely there for the band and for the live show and not the tiktok discourse. He knows. It’s just a lot to process alongside all the other stuff. Must be hard.

[personthattoleratesme]

So, you want to study new phannies?

well, same, i don't know what happened to me either but let me try to explain, you might find it amusing

you see, I'm 19 now, so back when they first were active i wasn't enough chronically online to be obsessed with any internet personality. (for reference, i was five when dan posted his first video.)

then covid and lockdowns happened and through some twists and turns i was catapulted deep into the 1D fandom, more specifically the larry portion of it. it was incredibly toxic and unhealthy, but it was also so much fun and taught me a lot about fandom and shipping culture. i eventually moved on into much healthier fandom spaces and honestly thought (and hoped) i was over being a fan of Real Living Human Beings.

now, i had obviously heard of dan and phil before but never watched any of their videos. so when they announced the return of dapg and everyone here freaked out about it i thought, eh, might as well take a look.

i don't know what it was about them, their dynamic, the casual happy queerness, the way they love and care for each other, their little stupid quirks, dan's way with words, but it pulled me in so damn quickly. so far i have no regrets, watching them is so nice and comforting.

however it also felt so intoxicatingly familiar to when i first got into larry, which scared me at first because i did not want to go back to anything like that time of my life. by now i have realised that this is different. it feels like a better version of whatever i had going on back then, because this time there is no need for wild speculations and intrusive theorising. them being themselves and sharing what they want to share is more than enough. maybe it's just hopeful thinking but i feel like it is actually possible to have a healthy parasocial relationship with them.

i might have missed it just a teeny tiny bit.

also!!! i feel like i picked the exact right time for this new obsession because there's so much going on, it's so fun and i amm excited for the future!

dunno if the tumblr phandom is the right place for me, right now i am pretty content with just lurking and watching you guys do your thing

with love,

a new phannie

first of all i want to say welcome new phannie! i hope you enjoy and benefit from the enrichment of our little corner of the internet.

i really enjoyed reading your story. as soon as i read larry i had a visceral full-body reaction ngl, i'm so sorry you went through that.

you have really chosen an excellent time to become a phannie. the toxicity is mostly out of the fandom, dnp are in control of the narrative now, and we don't have to deal with all the phan proof shit anymore.

it gives me so much joy that nowadays their queer happiness can be a factor in becoming a fan of theirs. there's just something so special about how after everything they've been through - and everything we've been through as phandom - that there is now this wonderfully queer and happy space that can feel safe and inviting for young queer people.

i really hope that this parasocial relationship with them will turn out to be what you're looking for. when i was a teenager they helped me through so much, and now that we're all older and have been able to grow as people i think we genuinely have a very good and healthy parasocial relationship with them as a fandom.

thank you so much for your sharing your story, i genuinely find it so fascinating to learn about 2023 phannies.

you're totally welcome to lurk here for as long as you want. i was a lurker for a long time cause phannie tumblr kind of scared me. i used to only exist in the anon asks of other users and feel free to do the same.

now i want to know: what was your first dnp video?

[hoghtastic]

It's me again. I'm the one who wrote the ask about feeling ridiculous about feeling hurt about Alex & Johanne being together/possibly living together.

To the anon who thinks I was making fun of the other anons here & mocking you guys or "usuing a different angle," you can feel how you want, but I was honestly being serious. I did use some of the same words & phrases that a lot of you guys have used to describe what you call a "stan" on purpose & I started out putting it in quotations but I figured it wouldn't be necessary for all of them that I mentioned. I wasn't doing that to try to make myself look better or "claim" anything. I was doing exactly what the admin said-I felt like these descriptions describe me to a certain degree BUT I do not feel like I am a stan. I can think for myself, I don't follow the crowd, I don't kiss ANYONE'S a$$, & even if I "like someone" (Johanne for example), I have no problem saying if I disagree with with something they've said or done. Anything I say or do is because I feel like it's right & not because I think I may gain something from it. And that's the exact point of my original ask. I know that if I were to post lovey dovey posts of the two of them that it's not getting me anywhere with either of them. I also know if I posted something calling her out on her BS, it's also not gaining me any props from anyone here who disagrees with how she's represented herself. And when I say I'm usually smarter than this, I meant it. I feel rather intelligent but obviously not brilliant & I know I have lots I can still learn in this lifetime. However, something about this ridiculous feeling I have when it comes to Alex makes me feel very F@%KING insane! And I, otherwise, feel like I'm definitely not! So I hope you can understand, I'm seriously NOT trying to make you or anyone else feel like I'm trying to talk negatively about you in some sort of sincerely twisted way. I'm seriously here, pouring my heart out, because I don't know anyone in my personal life who would even understand WTF I'm even talking about, let along be able to give me any suggestions.

Now, to the admin, wow! Your response sincerely moved me & really brought tears to my eyes! I know very little about parasocial relationships & have only heard about it in relation to this Fandom (go figure) so thank you for linking the article (that I haven't yet read but will) & for your feedback. I am usually pretty self aware & I think that's exactly what is freaking me out because I know, from the mixed feelings I've been having lately, that something is CLEARLY very off for these types of things to be bothering me but at the same time, not bothering me. Does that make any sense? Lol I know better. Yet, I can't control it. I try. I discuss this with the one friend in the Fandom that I have but I've still come up with no real explanation. And you, my dear, sweet knowledgeable admin, have given me lots of food for thought & I thank you! Sincerely, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. I don't quite think I need professional help just YET lol but I definitely see that almost anything could tip that cup in that direction quite easily. And just so you & anyone else who MAY feel a bit concerned, know, I'm NOT at risk of doing anything stupid like hurting myself {or anyone else lmao} due to all these ridiculous issues. I love me way too much. It's just that I recognize some of what I've been feeling isn't really that "normal," & when I've searched deep within & asked myself why it's happening, I have been unsuccessful. I'm happy to hear this can be something that others experience, too, because quite frankly, I sometimes feel SO D*MN alone! I do know there's some good from all of this because I have made a bond with the friend I mentioned above because of Alex.

I guess, ultimately, my issues really have nothing to do with Alex, his life, his gf, or happiness with her at all but honestly, everything to do with me, myself and I'm projecting my thoughts of how things should be onto to him, the object of my affection. & yes, how we see him at conventions definitely doesn't help anything.

Maybe I should have written this all out in a private message to you & not here for everyone to read, but honestly, maybe the responses from you & anyone who doesn't think I'm trying out "a different angle" can be helpful to others as well. Sorry this is so long but thank you from the deepest pit of my soul for posting the other ask & for your advice & helpful information. I just may end up sending you a private message before long (& I hear over half the people here saying, "Oh thank God!" as they yawn. Haha)

Thank you for everything & I promise not to bother you guys with this any longer!

And P.S.

I hope you all understand how serious I am now. (& yes, seriously crazy, too. But at least I can laugh at myself!)

Anon to anon. 😊

As for me, I’m really glad my response was somewhat helpful. Rest assured that you’re definitely not insane nor are you alone in this, anon. Your feelings are valid, and I truly admire you for being so self aware of them and bringing up such an important discussion, especially in the context of a fandom. Parasocial relationships are very common, especially nowadays, and even encouraged by the industry who sees them as profitable. So I feel it’s important for people to understand what they are and why we get caught up in such relationships, their benefits (like making new friends, like you mentioned), but also their darkest side. So thank you too. 😊 And if you (or anyone else) ever need someone to listen, I’m always a message away.

[somuchyoudontknow]

Remember the people on socials who made fun of him in Ghosted? Yea, they are the ones who are saying ‘oh poor Chris’ his fans are crazy. But they had no problem mocking him for his acting.

I am grossed out by this narrative of blaming fans. I don’t feel entitled to him, I’ve never tagged Scott or Chris or even commented on their socials, so I know I’m not one they are referring to. However, the way this is being handled is I am embarrassed to ever say I was a Chris Evans fan now for fear someone is going to assume I’m one of the stalkers/crazies.

Because the problem is they aren’t speaking about this in terms of ratios. It’s not like 1%-5% of fans are crazy. No it does come off like anyone who’s a fan of Chris evans is psycho.

Change the damn language! Don’t say fans. Say stalkers, crazies, bullies, haters etc. but separate the general fanbase from the extreme who have not respected boundaries and formed parasocial relationships with him in their heads. Who have done and said hateful things.

His diehard fans are the ones who watched Ghosted and give a crap about his non-marvel movies. Not the GP who feel bad for him now. Good luck Chris with your narrative blaming fans!

I’m not approving of all of the crap that has happened in the past year by a select group of ‘fans’, but I really hate that the actions of few are now the reason everyone is being blamed.

Seeing the majority of the fanbase be fun and decent, kind people and then get accused of this just bothers me.

.

[g-gurokisses]

Ahh it's a fairly embarrassing crush. Celebrity crushes on adults as a minor is perfectly normal, ask a parent and they'll tell you something like Johnny Depp or Leonardo Caprio. Thing is, a little toxic trait of mine is me genuinely thinking I can get with him.

He's four years older than me, a streamer, and goodness is he my type. What's absolutely infuriating though is there's an entire sub genre based off of crushing on him. I know some people reading this might know exactly who I'm talking about, and to that, no snitches 'til I feel confident to say lol!!

The reason why I genuinely think I can get with him is considering he moves around America a lot, so it'll be no surprise if he lands at my state. Hell, one of his famous friends was at my city!

He also knows who I am.. barely. But to me that makes it more exciting. He laughed at my chat log once, it was literally just 'eat the soap' when he was playing a game about a girl who's pretty traumatized and would eat anything. She ate one of those fake cherries on Christmas decorations once.

My auntie (not actual aunt, I don't have one. I call my friend my auntie) even made some sort of subliminal for me to see if it'll attract him in any way. I still use it, and whenever I use it he flies closer and closer to my state. Once I was painting him and I smelt brownies and clean clothes, which is a sign it's working!

Thing is, is that he's a gay man. No, I'm not a woman, I'm a transmasc, but there's a bug in the back of my mind screaming that I'll never be with him because I'm so feminine. I'm nearly two feet shorter then him, overweight, etc.

He was in San Diego recently doing meetups, which was closer then his last meetup. I won't say exactly where I am, but it's closer.

I have polariods of him, art prints of him, I have personal fanfictions my auntie wrote of me and him.

But then reality hits sometimes. I can't and will never be with him. He's a legal adult, four years older than me. I'm feminine. When I am the AOC he'll most likely be dating someone.

Which just drives me to become more obsessed.

I say the thrill of him not knowing me is fun, and that it's romantic, but it's insufferable. It's one of those cases where you go, 'not to self diagnose but something is definitely wrong here'.

It's horrible, but I love it.

Don't get me started on his close friends and the person he's in contact with the most.

I already made a promise to myself that if the day comes he's with one of them, things will happen. And I will make it known why.

-🍄🌸

Thank you for sharing this with me!!

My my... What a long confession this is!! I don't really understand how you feel, these behaviors are quite foreign to me. But I can somewhat understand where you're coming from. Parasocial relationships like this can feel very realistic.

However, as the responsible yandere enthusiast I am, I will still make some remarks about this. I'm sure you love him very much, but I think it's just nice to remember that you probably don't know the real him. Whatever he displays on social media and the internet does not reflect who he really is. Not only that, but I really don't think you should be putting yourself down for being too feminine. Cis men get away with being pretty boys all the time!! The issue is not your gender. If anything it would only be your age. Be careful with interacting with adults like that, you're putting yourself in dangerous situation. It should always be on the adult to not initiate something, but young people who show active interest in adults often get caught in bad positions by people who take advantage of that.

If I'm truly honest I think this is a bit much. I hate to be like this, but I personally think it's important to separate this level of obsession from fiction/hobby to reality. I have obsessive tendencies, I get jealous, I require constant reassuring, I have anxious attachment and I get clingy often. But there's a limit I put to myself and I only ever display these behaviours with people I know, trust and are okay with it.

But this person is an adult who is probably in a relationship. Maintaining an obsession will most likely just end up with you doing things you regret. I'm not sure what you mean with "things will happen" but I don't believe that's healthy for a young person like you to be saying. And I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume this friend of yours is not a legal adult as well. Because if so was the case, I don't see why they would be encouraging you to take meassures against this public figure being with someone else.

Hopefully you take this well. I do not mean ti offend you or disappoint you. But this seems a bit much to me. I enjoy yanderes, but I do not consider myself one. And furthermore, I am an adult. I know what I'm doing, and I know how to act. As a child, you should probably not dive into these topics just yet, and maybe not with such aggressiveness.

If you'd like to talk about this more or if you believe I misunderstood something, let me know!! But I'll mantain my opinion about this until then. Remember, all I've said is with the best intentions and I hope you understand me. I love you. :)

[fandomstudieslance]

Fan Autoethnography

I wear fan merch. I consider fan merch as an important part of my fan identity especially when the merch is part of limited edition collections. I fell that having these limited edition collections allows me to tie my fandom to a specific period of time in both the fandom's history as well as my own.

I will often go back and rewatch episodes or entire shows to analyze the subtext or extrapolate meanings that I hadn't considered on a first watch. One of the shows that I recently have done this for is Bones. I watched this show when I was much younger and by going back and watching it now, I can appreciate the nuance and deeper context surrounding the characters and their storyline. In particular, I have picked up the autistic coding of the character of Dr. Brennan.

I am very involved in fan communities for many different fandoms. Some communities I am more involved than others. One community I am greatly involved in is the Random Enocunters community. This is also a community that I create fan works for. I am in charge of the fan wiki community as well as my own personal fan theories and fan interpretation of unexplained events.

I follow important media figures on social media mainly to keep in the loop with the projects they are going to be in. For Hollywood celebrities, I am less likely to care about their personal post, but for content creators I follow, I am more likely to engage with their personal posts.

I engage with many different types of fan content, from fan fiction to fan video essays. One of my favorite fan content types is the fan music video. These can come in the form of the fan edit or animatics. Fan edits are fun because they often include memerable clips from the media that serve as fun gaps in the song. Animatics have the added benefit of animating fandom events in a new and often more intense way.

I think that fandom does have an us vs them construction. In many of my fandoms, I am in the 'us' category. This often involves knowing the inside jokes and reference or understanding why a piece of merch is important to wear. These things can be understood at a surface level by mainstream society but the connection that they have to the fans is only understood by the people that hold it dear.

I don't think that there is a thin line between normal and excessive fan because there does exist the causal fan. I would say that I am a casual fan of dungeons and dragons. I have a positive relationship with the ttrpg and know some things about it but my knowledge and appreciation is not at the level of other fans but not as barebones as the mainstream audience. I think the line of "obsessive" fan falls where the person begins to integrate the fandom into their core personality.

My DND Character Larissa

Anonymity is both beneficial for fandom spaces and detrimental. It is well documented in social psychology that anonymity leads to people being more likely to say or do things that they would not other wise say or do. It allows people to be meaner because the fear of consequences is basically nonexistent. However, I do think that anonymity opens up fandom spaces to many different people who can use that separation from online and inperson identity to form connections and converse with people while being safe. I have a close friend I met online who values their privacy because they are younger and the anonymity of fandom space allows them to engage with other people while still valuing their privacy.

I think that I experience a blend of identity and psychological compensation with fandom. Anything that matters deeply to you is going to become part of your identity. Being a theorist is one of my core identity traits. This doesn't stop fandom from forming those psychological compensations. I would say that, especially when I watched regular streamers, I would form parasocial relationships with them. I knew that they did not feel the same way but the connection and the positive feelings from it were still there and played into my enjoyment of the content.

Language progression. When immersed in a fandom, there are definitely terms and inside jokes that bleed out into the real world, especially when you are around other people who understand the joke. One of the big language bleeds has been me and my siblings use of "theory" to refer to any instance where we are trying to predict the outcome or explanation of something. This comes directly from our shared fandom of Game Theory. Another that we both share is to dramatically say "What was the motivation?!?!?" when discussing confusing events, which comes from a creators reaction to a fan video.

[a-nice-egg-offering]

Because of your tags: I dislike Jared not because he is part of J2 or anything. I don't like him because he's done a few questionable things, such as doxxing a hotel employee on Twitter asking them to be fired because he was unhappy, exposing them to a bunch of fan hate and of course destroying their future, or getting in drunk fights, or getting a tattoo that can very well be seen as racist symbolism and is worn by right-wing racists (whether he is one is of course not clear, but he should be aware that this symbol is not unproblematic). There is a bunch of things in his behavior that suggest a certain arrogance or at least a very inpatient, self-centered behavior, and that's why the image of cute goofball doesn't work for me. And I think that's for a lot of other cockles or destiel shippers, too, not the fact he's part of j2 or anything. However, some may see this as an us vs them thing too, I can't deny it. Also you do you, I hope you enjoy blogging about Jared! I am not writing you this anon to spread any hate and I hope you have a fun time on here. I am just writing to explain the question in the tags, but that long doesn't mean that you cannot have a different opinion 😊

I appreciate the tone of this anon, the theme of respect and letting people with different opinions to you voice them without you coming for their whole family has been largely abandoned on tumblr since the influx of Twitter refugees so just want to say thank you for reiterating that we’re all here to have fun and it’s fine for people to like different things! I’d say I agree that the majority of the cockles/destiel fandom or even the fandom in general doesn’t like Jared anymore for those reasons and that is ofc valid, I just personally believe parasocial relationships have led us all to know too much about the personal lives of the entertainers we watch when in reality it’s not that deep like we don’t know them, they’re there to entertain us, if they’re a dickhead in their personal life that’s their prerogative but I also totally understand why people don’t want to support him in any way after things he’s done in recent years but I will say before those incidents it was definitely more of a divide for no good reason there was just this random war between the cockles/destiel people and the j2/wincest people so a lot of people did just hate Jared simply bc he wasn’t jensen and Misha or because he invaded their panels sometimes or some other stupid shit like that, that’s more what I was talking about. Hope you’re having a good day :)

[crucible-memes-4-salem-teens]

be the type of person that the real person blorbo from your shows is based on would express at least a mild discomfort towards 🙏

[shoezuki]

Fun fact: punz, who also potentially has adhd - he's def some kind of neurodivergent and ppl say he has adhd but I am yet to find confirmation - and can't remember blocks for shit, tells his chat what he needs. And we obligingly spam it when he asks us what he's missing. We also spam it when he misses something he needs. There are workarounds for memory issues in build mart, if desperately needed.

However. I do also think the way people talk about dream and buildmart is dumb. The idea that he's never tried to find work arounds or adapt his play, like there isn't an entire MCC where he and techno entirely separately came up with the same idea of making a list of every block that would be needed, implemented it and both did well. He has not yet found a workaround that works for him personally, but I'm sure he will eventually.

So my main issue with this drama isn't dream. Sure, he should probably stop saying dumb, inaccurate shit about build mart, but I've watched this drama go down since 1am my time. It's 3:30pm right now. That's 12 and a half hours. Some of the same people have been talking about this man for twelve and a half hours, straight, and they're complaining dream doesn't know when to shut up? Like. This is without prompting, too. Like I'm seeing these ppl do multiple threads w/out even having the Tumblr thing of anons sharing their opinions or asking yours that artificially prolong things. Personally, I think these ppl need to please take a leaf out of their own criticisms. Parasocial relationships can be based in hatred too, and I think, personally, some people need to realise that maybe complaining about someone not liking a Minecraft minigame you like for a solid 12 hours isn't healthy, actually.

I also have some other opinions but I do not wish to share them publically lest I get eviscerated by my own followers.

HONEST TO GOD YA LIKE mans Has talked bout tryin other shit which is fine n good n i hope he figures some shit out

But YA like this shit goes on so long n so often i see jus like repeat threads over n over bout it n its like some huge echochamber n constantly im like. Ok i think we're good the clownin was fun for a bit but lets focus on ben shapiro retweeting from velvet

[chemicalpink]

Hi! There are so many readings on JK’s future spouse lately. They are popping up all over tumblr, youtube etc What could be the reason? I feel like maybe she recently went through a spiritual awakening. Also, the mala - maybe JK is going through his own spiritual journey too?

Oooohhh I could go on and on on the topic.

As much as I have been on the spiritual side for most of my life, I really do believe, as a sociologist, that there are some places where they intersect so yeah. If you feel up to an essay to get the details on this fated connection and how it plays out (in my perspective) have a read:

I think that JK’s soulmate (two flame, fated, whatever type) is indeed on their own spiritual journey (I wouldn’t call it awakening bc it seems to me they are quite an energetic force spiritual-wise) but I think that the whole fuss and the fact that there is a possibility that they meet in a short time has nothing to do with it.

From what I have experienced as an ARMY, Jungkook seems to be one of the most sought out members, which has its own energy shifts as it is, now, ever since many people have said that in his spiritual journey he will encounter a past-life partner oh man it caused too many energy shifts not just within his own journey but the connection.

Most of us are okay with playing our part as fans, but there are many people out there that have birthed some deeply rooted parasocial relationships with him and apart from all the harm that it entails fantasising beyond reason, it causes a type of energy in the universe similar to manifestation, with so many people talking about his life journey and wanting to insert themselves in it, claiming to be his soulmate... it’s changing the narrative, the universe’s perspective on the fated connection, but that’s just how these things work.

If they really share a fated connection, and they both come to terms with their own spiritual journeys, things will work out in the end. Or Jungkook might end with someone else that has inserted themselves in the connection. Either way, it’s their soul and not their bodies reaching out to each other, so whether they meet during this lifetime or the next one, makes no difference whatsoever.

Now, I think so too. I strongly believe (and I’ve said it before, I have experienced) that Jungkook has become one hell of a spiritual human being, from some months ago to now his energy has shifted a ton, I think that someone is guiding him and his energy is much more guarded now (I think he knows the power he holds and that might be the reason he hadn’t interacted with army as much until recently bc his energy is safer now) and I just find it so funny that none of the other people that claim to know the tea on him and his soulmate really talk about how hard it has become to hear from his higher self, and I’m talking from a personal experience here, now pulling cards from him has become so freaking hard (comparatively with the other members), any other type of divination has become constant “maybes” or “ask again” (and I mean, not to toot my own horn but I’ve been a medium/intuitive reader for 15 years now so I’d say I’ve got down the experience).

In conclusion, there’s a fuss all over the internet that in my opinion, is more for clout and a need to fulfill parasocial relationships than for what it is meant to be: for funsies which ultimately has caused energy shifts to a point where it is really hard to tell a thing as truth about the connection.

Anywho, Jeon Jungkook always makes sure to throw in a card (or three) about how much he’s longing for his soulmate in my readings and then leaves me to fend for myself with a terrible headache for trying hard to reach out for the crumbs.

Also, I know that I, myself, am a “BTS tarot reader” HOWEVER I’d have to say that I have a very VERY STRONG moral/ethical compass, I obviously don’t post here everything that comes out on the readings, I have put out some strong limits on how much info gets out from me bc I am already getting in quite some trouble as it is, I’m spilling things from personal journeys that do not belong to me and I do not have explicit consent to get the info out. So I keep it plain and simple, lightly spicy for the fun of it.