#it literally takes ten mins and is so easy and SO good for u

[fanby-fckry]

I wonder what it’d look like if Tumblr Dot Com was a literal hellsite…

Source: voxblr.vox #unreality cw #meta post #hellaverse #hazbin hotel #helluva boss

( 6 notes )

📺 voxblr4k ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ Follow

12 hr. ago

You can control moths by giving them lamps

❤️ moth-pimp Follow

22 min. ago

lamps are so good tho

📺 voxblr4k ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ Follow

21 min. ago

I got one

Source: voxblr.vox #Val bb that was too easy #thanks for taking my mind off the whole Alastor thing though

( 52,256 notes )

🪡 niffty-lady 📠 Follow

3 hr. ago

Opening Comms Again!

\(˶ ᴗ ͡ ˶) Hi, Niffty here! Letting all my lovely readers know I’m opening up fic commissions again!

Updated Pricing Chart:

$6 flat for < 1k words

$10 per additional 1k

Payment UP FRONT!!!

It’s not my fault if you get erased before I’m done ¯\(˶ ᴗ ͡ ˶)/¯

Will Write:

Smut

Whump

Kink

Gore

RPF

X Reader

Won’t Write:

Fandoms I’m not in (check my blog)

Anything I find too boring or too gross

🪡 niffty-lady 📠 Follow

1 hr. ago

For people commenting on the price increase: my beta reader found out I was charging and now I have to give him a cut.

#sorry

( 53 notes )

🍸 bar-cat75 Follow

22 hr. ago

Niff roped me into editing her freaky-ass fanfiction again.

I’ve never wanted to claw my own eyes out more than I have tonight.

🍸 bar-cat75 Follow

4 hr. ago

Hold on, what the fuck?

🍸 bar-cat75 Follow

4 hr. ago

I just found her voxblr… she gets paid to write this shit???

And I’m editing it for FREE?

🍸 bar-cat75 Follow

4 hr. ago

Fuck this shit. I’m on strike.

( 6 notes )

🐸 jest-fizzarolli Follow

6 hr. ago

hazbin employee: oh hey, ur back early

redeemed sinner: heaven’s haunted

hazbin employee: what?

redeemed sinner: *loading carmine pistol and glowing* heaven’s haunted

Source: v.vox ↯ #hazbin hotel #jester’s privilege #shitpost #my posts

( 504,370 notes )

🩸 simply-moxxie Follow

9 hr. ago

Does anyone know if @/real-radio-demon is actually the Radio Demon?

My boss follows him, but I’m not convinced…

🎀 moth-gf Follow

7 hr. ago

It’s not him. Alastor doesn’t even know what voxblr is. He won’t touch hellphones with a ten foot pole.

I’ve been trying to get the account taken down for impersonation/misinformation because whoever it is keeps spreading bullshit lies about the hotel.

🩸 simply-moxxie Follow

6 hr. ago

Thanks. I’ll report it, too.

( 3 notes )

📻 real-radio-demon Follow

9 hr. ago

Murder :)

💥 blitz-the-o-is-silent Follow

6 hr. ago

ur my hero

↯ #alastor the radio demon

( 119,594 notes )

🌕 m00nlight-h0wling 🌕 Follow

7 hr. ago

@.real-radio-demon is obviously a fake but its so fucking funny. i hope staff never takes it down.

🐝 queen-bee-lzebub Follow

7 hr. ago

If staff takes it down we fuckin riot!

Hear that @.voxblr4k ?

🐺 666--vortex Follow

7 hr. ago

Bee and Loon vs voxblr staff

Now that’s a fight I’d pay to see

#love my gfs #vox and co wouldn’t stand a chance ↯ #alastor the radio demon

( 81,087 notes )

📻 real-radio-demon Follow

9 hr. ago

Murder :)

📺 voxblr4k ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ Follow

7 hr. ago

Motherfucker!

#Velvette if that’s you I swear to Satan I will end you #can’t even suspend the fucking account #because I’m being threatened by a goddamn deadly sin #fuck my life #rb

( 119,594 notes )

📺 voxblr4k ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ Follow

8 hr. ago

Why tf is Alastor trending?

( 139 notes )

💥 blitz-the-o-is-silent Follow

9 hr. ago

changed my url cuz sum of u fuckers still say my name rong

blitzorodeo –> @.blitz-the-o-is-silent

get it rite assholes

( 0 notes )

🪡 niffty-lady 📠 Follow

12 hr. ago

One of the funniest things about enemies-to-lovers ships is how they’re almost always obsessed with each other. Like if a character actively chooses to interact with another character over and over again instead of simply ignoring them? Throw darts at it all you want, but you still printed out a picture of them to hang on your wall

🕸️ angie-fluffy-bootz Follow

12 hr. ago

"Throw darts at it all you want, but you still printed out a picture of them to hang on your wall." - This is a raw line.

🧁 rad-velvette-cake ☑️ 🧵 Follow

10 hr. ago

@.voxblr4k

📺 voxblr4k ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ Follow

10 hr. ago

Fuck you, Velvette!!! It’s not like that!

Source: voxblr.vox #gonna delete this whole hellsite one day #rb

( 75,350 notes )

⬜️ voxblrverse-meta Follow

11 hr. ago

Fanby’s Fake Dash Masterpost

[knifenymph]

the meal i'm eating right now... Exquisite

sautéed mushrooms and spinach with garlic, onion, lemon, turmeric, salt, n pepper (my go to, quick meal) mixed in with quinoa, all inside a spaghetti squash omfg..........

[foryouthegays]

Forming a secret organization [Dream SMP] liveblog and summary!

Good laugh times: 7:40, 1:18:15, 1:19:25

Protect mr philza minecraft from baby zombies (he really went all out on that bit today): 20:35, 32:40 34:45, 1:16:35

Sellout pog: 30:45, 1:00:50, 1:30:55, 2:01:15

Summary:

Techno started the stream in the Nether. He quickly went back to the overworld and to his house, where he meets up with Phil and Ranboo. He mentions that the house smells like gunpowder, and Phil quickly ushers them outside and they continue their conversation.

Techno nudges Ranboo away from the conversation, and he leaves the call. Phil and Techno watch as Ranboo leaves the house, and then Techno tells Phil his news. He talks about how taking down L’Manburg wasn’t the greatest plan, especially as he’s only one person. He wants to bring other people to their anarchist ways.

Phil agrees to form a secret organization for anarchists, because they can’t fight ten to one.

Techno and Phil go to Ranboos house, asking for a feather, and Ranboo asks if he’s getting kicked out. They say no, and then Ranboo says that he has something that might get him kicked out.

He talks about how he sometimes doesn’t remember what he does, and that he was the person who blew up the community house.

Techno asks why, and Ranboo says he doesn’t know.

Phil and Techno agree that they don’t really care about the community house, and Ranboo continues, saying that he has one of the discs. Phil and Techno agree again that they don’t care about the discs at all.

Techno and Phil leave.

Techno leads Phil to a stronghold, which he calls a ‘structure,’ and they cover it with gravel to hide it. They enter the structure, and they find a library, some useless doors, and keep exploring, finding nothing. Techno is confused, thinking that there had to have been a reason for the stronghold's existence.

While looking at a connected Abandoned Mineshaft, Techno finds an enchanted golden apple.

They go into the lower parts of the stronghold, and they find a prison. Techno mentions that the bread he found earlier tasted around 2,000 years old, which gives us a rough (and joking) estimate of when the stronghold was made.

Phil finds a strange portal, and they talk about how advanced the previous civilization must had been, to be able to make unbreakable blocks. They hear a villager writing, and dig up to a strange room.

It ends up being the igluu where Orphans parents lived, and they start laughing, but then, DreamXD logs in. He breaks the portal, and then leaves. Techno begs dream to put the portal back, because it would’ve added to the lore, and that their characters didn’t know what it was, and were going to use it as a table.

Dream logs in again, and puts one (1) portal frame block down, and then leaves again. Phil tells Dream how to place the blocks incorrectly so they wouldn’t form a portal, and he logs in to place them back.

DreamXD hears Techno joking about going to the end, logs in, and then logs out when Techno says he’s joking. Then, Techno explains the difference between DreamXD and Dream, saying that DreamXD has canonical access to creative mode, and is like God, but Dream is just some homeless teletubby. DreamXD logs in, says ‘they actually are I am the protector,” and logs out.

In chat, Techno asks ‘who was that dram fanboy, how did he get whitelisted,’ and DreamXD logs in again, hits Techno with a sword a few times, and logs out.

Techno and Phil decorate the meeting room a bit, and they start talking about what the association should be called. Techno says that he wants it to be the ‘[blank] Syndicate,’ and before they can agree on anything, Ranboos nametag is spotted, and they agree to kill him if he comes into the meeting room.

Techno puts down a sign with the organization's motto, which is ‘Sic semper tyrannis,’ which means ‘thus always to tyrants.’

He starts writing in the manifesto.

“This syndicate is formed to promote anarchy and fight tyranny in all its forms.

“We shall have no Leader; no member shall be compelled to act if they do not choose to.

“No member shall reveal information about the Syndicate to outsiders.

“Technoblade shall serve as the Recruiter to induce new members into the Syndicate with Approval from a Majority of members.”

Phil and Techno leave the Stronghold, and realize that the Igluu wasn’t actually Orphans parents, but instead a different Igluu that Ranboo had been using for Cartographers. They go back to the house, planning to meet with Ranboo, but on the way, they find a strange tower made of stone. Its hollow, but theres no chests or anything inside. They continue and meet with Ranboo, who has gifts for them. Techno gets a Netherite shovel with Efficiency V, Mending, Silk Touch, and Unbreaking III.

He brings them under his house, and we find he has a ‘comfort room,’ made of netherrack, that has several mob heads on the walls, an extra set of armor, and pets sitting next to the ladder. They talk about the map on the wall, and Techno seems concerned, or a bit scared.

Techno and Phil leave the call, and talk about how extremely strange the room, and Ranboo, was. They recount their adventure, and move the villagers into a more efficient layout. Ranboo joins them after a few minutes, at 1:38:00, and they work on curing the zombie villagers and giving them jobs

Liveblog:

I love when technos computer says he isnt streaming so he just rambles about that before it says he does and then he does the starting the streammm thing. Also if u havent heard the starting the streammmm thing u r missing out it is amazin

Techno pls get a new laptop im gonna cry

HE SAID THREE HE SAID THREE if u dont know, techno says three v nicely

“I havent even shown you the secrets, how would you guys be able to snitch??” SIR????

Oh my god is he using his phone to read chat,,,,,i hate him i hate him so much u haVE 5 MIL SUBS AND CANT EVEN GET A SECOND MONITOR WHYY

Ranboo!!! Philza minecraft!!!!! Hi!!!

5:40 ‘why does it smell like gunpowder?’ Techno there is no smell in minecraft. Lore pog?

6:45 AKDFJGLSA RANBOOS FUNDY IMPRESSION IM

8:45 ‘any second now its gonna be 11 percent updated, and thats like halfway done, if you think about it’ adhd autism solidarity right there lmao

I dont think techno can physically pay attention to lore for more than a minute at a time. He just like, sees a dog and zooms in on it while someones talking and its such a mood. All techno know is get distracted, kill orphans, protect philza minecraft, and anarchy. Love him

10:45 he just got COMPLETELY distracted w his laptop im actually crying form laughter

So uh. 17 mins in. Techno (without saying anything). Kills a zombie that was trying to kill ranboo. Thats. Thats a thing he only does for people he trusts. Uhhh

Technos voice at 21:30,,,,,,hhghn why is he like this why is he randomally doing weird voices

26:35 ‘hacker voice: were in’ HGKDFJSL

Ok but techno making fun of doors is so funny tho. Also he rlly did go all out on the baby zombie bit tdoay im actually crying

Techno when phils being chased by two creepers, a few zombies, and skeletons: i do not see it

Techno when phils being chased by one (1) baby zombie: loOK OUT PHILZA MINECRAFT

42:00 god apple poggggg

45:50 techno sir why do u know what 2,000 year old bread tastes like

Dsmp techno :handshake: minecraft story mode techno

Hating doors

Dsmp techno :handshake: smp earth techno

Living right above a stronghold

48:35 ‘dude, they had all this super advanced technology because they didnt waste time trying to figure out how to make doors’ FSKHGJDAL

50:25 UH?? WHAT IS THAT LMAO

OH ITS ORPHANS PARENTS LMAOOOO

GDFJKHSL DREAM HI

51 MINS IN HGJSKDFJASL DREAM PUT IT BACK IT WAS A GOOD TABLE DREAM

56:25 ‘listen, I’ve read a lot of mythology Phil, and nothing bad has ever happened from angering the gods.’ You SURE about that?

I will actually never get over techno making fun of dream its so funny to me 1:01:10

I am so, so extremely queer for technos planning/schemeing voice like when its kinda quieter and deeper n slower? Hhgnn

Also is latin canon in this universe? Pog

Asmr Technoblade makes a cult :)

Ok ok ok ok SO i know that techno wants to make all the members equal (and i do think that hell try his best to make that possible) but bc hes just,,,so FREAKING powerful both in terms of pvp and resources, i feel like his opinion IS gonna matter more, but also im p sure hes the writer of the arc so like. He has more important opinions anyway so unless he is v obviously controlling the other members of the group, i think this could be a fun collab thing. And i am SO excited to see all yalls analysis for what other people think of him ahhHHH i love analysis.

1:17:10 “whose idea was it to make baby zombies stronger? Why are the babies stronger?? Have you ever fought a baby in real life? I have, and it was trivially easy to defeat, Phil.” TECHNO????

Also i can NOT believe that someone thinks techno doesnt use dark humor,,,,have u WATCHED his videos?????

1:25:05 Like literally RIGHT after he makes a joke abt how ranboos shovel’ll be good for digging graves for his enemies, which was taking soooo long before

Ah yes, technoblade, the 21 yr old child 1:28:40

[artificialqueens]

A Vampire in Paris: Part 3 (Gigi/Crystal) - Chae

A/N: well this took ten times longer than i expected… so sorry for the wait! (was anyone waiting? idk) hopefully I can update this at LEAST once a week for now ee. anyway thank you all so much for the support on the first two chapters, i’m so glad people enjoy my wacky fashion-vampire fantasy

Summary:  Gigi has an… interesting encounter with the supermodel trio and makes some big changes with Crystal

—-

Well, this was a situation.

Gigi broke out into a slight sweat as Aquaria, Naomi, and Valentina peered right into her soul at the cafe. She smiled awkwardly as she took a sip of water, seemingly the only one who actually drank… or ate. And she was eating a salad! In Paris! What the fuck were they looking at her like that for?!

The youngest model was still tired from the previous night, trying to push down her discomfort with happy thoughts of kissing Crystal. The ginger had tried desperately to look her best for her lunch date with the supermodels, shocked that they still didn’t seem impressed. After a long bout of silence as the three older girls eyed Gigi eating, Valentina piped up across from her.

“Gigi… what’s that short for?”

The aforementioned girl swallowed a lettuce leaf. “Genevieve. Genevieve Regina Goode.”

“That sounds like a movie character,” the tan beauty laughed. “I like your name.”

“Thanks. How did you get Valentina?”

“What do you mean? That’s just my name.”

“Oh,” Gigi cringed internally.”What’s your last name?”

“Hm, it’s been so long I don’t remember,” the girl smiled dopily as Aquaria slapped her arm next to her, annoyed. Gigi raised an eyebrow and Aquaria smiled fakely.

“We don’t really use our last names, except for Naomi because hers is easy,” the blonde said through her teeth, glaring at Valentina. The latter looked, confused, between Gigi and Aquaria. From next to her, Gigi could sense Naomi giving Valentina a look as well. 

“Oh!” She finally said, her face contorting into realization. “Yeah, we don’t use them,” the latina nodded. 

Gigi looked down, feeling as if she’d stumbled onto something she shouldn’t have—which was exactly what she wanted. Maybe she should press further…

“Why haven’t you guys eaten? These salads have a lot of good vitamins and stuff. I know we’re pressured into being like a size-negative-ten but what you ordere-”

“We already ate,” Naomi interrupted. “And if you feel self-conscious, sweets, don’t. Salads are good for you.”

“And you won’t have to worry about it much longer,” Valentina added earnestly. However, her kind… sentiment (?)… was not appreciated by the other two.

“Oh my god, shut up!” Aquaria whacked her on the back of the head. “You wanna get fired or something?!”

“I’m sorry guys,” Gigi tried to stop the drama. “I didn’t mean to intrude on whatever is happening-”

“No, no no! It’s not your fault,” Naomi explained, placing a freezing cold hand on Gigi’s shoulder. “It’s just that Valentina…”

“Valentina doesn’t know what she’s talking about, doll,” Aquaria smiled.

“Guuuuys I’m sorry!” Valentina whined. “I just keep forgetting she’s not a va-”

“Member of our team!” Aquaria shouted. “She’s not a member of our team,” the Italian jerked her head to the side, leaning towards Valentina and whispering something in her ear. The brunette’s eyebrows curved upwards as she whispered frantic sorries to her friend, who appeared absolutely venomous. Naomi rolled her eyes.

“We should head out and do some shopping, no? Maybe Val will be distracted by all the shiny things,” Naomi got up, rifling through her small purse for cash. Gigi nodded, just wanting to get out of this situation as soon as she could.

Soon enough, they were browsing at a beauty store—and yes, Valentina was distracted by the sparkly eyeshadows (go figure). Gigi wandered away from her ‘friends’ to the hair section, nearly passing by the dyes before a thought popped into her head. She grabbed two boxes of color and a toner off the shelf and smiled, paying for her items before finding the rest of the group. 

“Bought stuff already?” Aquaria looked at Gigi’s bag quizzically.

“It’s not makeup or anything, just had to restock,” the redhead lied.

“Oh, nice,” the blonde turned back to the lipstick she was trying on. Gigi filled the silent air by perusing the makeup counters, trying to not look too interested.

Naomi was texting someone with a coy smile plastered on her face, causing Gigi to remember something else odd she hadn’t addressed yet. 

“Aquaria?” She asked.

“Hm?”

“How did you get my number? I never found out.”

“Right. I asked Adore.”

“Adore doesn’t have my number…”

“Adore has everyone’s number,” she snapped, clearly looking annoyed. Gigi shrunk back and bit her lip. “The bitch has her ways,” Aquaria added.

“Can’t Fame access everyone’s data n’ stuff?” Valentina said offhandedly.

“What? Fame? Like Miss Fame?”

“Valentina, I’m going to rip your head off and smash it with my stiletto,” Aquaria threatened. 

“I thought Fame was… dead?” Gigi pressed.

“She is.”

“She is.”

Both Naomi and Aquaria looked the new model dead in the eyes, not a hint of intonation in their voices. Valentina, once again, looked at them confusedly, but held her tongue. Gigi felt the same glare that Raven had pierce her soul once again, and decided that enough was enough of these creeps. She stole away into the next aisle and ordered an Uber to pick her up ASAP. She peeked over the display and told the girls she was going to the bathroom, to which they nodded in unison without leaving their tasks. On that note, Gigi slinked out of the store and as far down the street as her heeled feet would take her.

She texted Crystal as she waited for the Uber, impatiently tapping her foot on the concrete ground.

Sexy Robot🥵🤖

heyyy, wanna meet up at your place? i have a surprise 

Hot Clown🤡🔥

DUH OMG u know I can’t wait 

when are u comin?

Sexy Robot🥵🤖

I’ll be there in like 20 mins 

Hot Clown🤡🔥

I can’t wait to see u🥺🥺🥺

Sexy Robot🥵🤖

keep your panties on, boss

Hot Clown🤡🔥

Don’t ever call me boss again you whore 

Sexy Robot🥵🤖

only for u ;)

Gigi smiled as her Uber finally arrived, excited to talk to Crystal after what happened the night prior. She’d not only had a steamy makeout session with a hot designer, she’d kissed the girl she liked when they were both semi-sober-ish. Her happiness was short-lived, though, when she received a text from Aquaria on a group chat she’d been added to. She exhaled nervously as she shut the car door, telling the driver where to go.

Hottest Hoes in Paris⭐️⭐️

Aquafina

Has anyone seen Gigi?

You’ve been in the bathroom an awful long time bitch

French Vanilla Fantasy

no :(

did she leave?!

GIGI WHERE ARE YOU

Bebe Badde

aaaa sorry guys I wasn’t feeling well!

LegsLegsLegsLegs

Awe babe you should have told us

Feel well soon

French Vanilla Fantasy

i send all my love to you!! 💛💘💚💘❤️💝💚💞💓❤️💘

Aquafina

Ya feel better!

Gigi sighed, having successfully escaped the strangest outing she’d ever been on. The drive to Fatelle was shorter than she’d expected, the model barely realizing she had reached her destination before paying the driver and nearly leaping out of the car. She sped into the lobby, saying hi to Adore before bounding to the elevator. She was almost giddy at the prospect of seeing Crystal again, unfamiliar with having a crush this strong. Gigi felt like she and Crystal fit together like puzzle pieces: anything she didn’t have, the designer did, and vice versa. But they still came together in the same picture, with the same values and dreams and—gosh, they were a match made in heaven.

Gigi gripped the shopping bag as she reached Crystals floor, finding her room (Crystal had texted her where she lived a few days prior) and knocking on the door. It opened almost immediately to a grinning Crystal, dressed in cute casual clothes and fluffy ugg slippers.

“What’s the surprise?” She said right away, letting the younger girl inside.

“First of all, hi,” Gigi rolled her eyes, giving the shorter girl a quick peck on the cheek. “Second of all, you’ll see. Third of all — you will not believe the day I’ve had.”

“Dang, it’s two PM!”

“And shits wild!”

“Spill.” Crystal plopped on the couch, motioning for Gigi to join her. The ginger kicked her shoes off and made herself comfortable, propping her tired legs on the coffee table. 

“So I met up with Aquaria and Naomi and Valentina…”

“No way!”

“Yes, Aqua invited me. And it was insane.”

“How?”

“Would you believe me if I told you that I think Fatelle is the Illuminati?”

“Honestly, with some of the shit that’s been going on…”

“Right?! Okay, they literally kept saying Miss Fame might be alive?”

“She’s alive in my heart, but… it’s been a whole century.”

“And they acted like it was real! And then Valentina said that I wouldn’t have to eat soon?“

“What? Why?”

“Like I wouldn’t physically need to eat.”

“That’s fucking weird.”

“It was the strangest thing. Am I in the Twilight Zone?”

“Maybe you’re in the Twilight! Edward or Jacob?”

“Edward.”

“Good choice. Edward.”

The two shared a chuckle, Crystal’s eyes flitting to the bag Gigi had brought.

“Is that the surprise?”

Gigi smirked, getting up and pulling out a box of bleach, purple toner, and a box of natural red dye. “Don’t think I didn’t remember what you said!”

“No! Oh my gosh you’re the best!” Crystal grabbed her dye and grinned widely, eyes crinkled in a cute way. “We have to do this now.”

“Raven’s gonna be pisssssed,” Gigi remembered, not really caring anyway.

“Raven is basically Edward’s cousin, who cares?”

“Oh shit she is like Edwards’ cousin! Bitch looks all pale and dark haired and ooky and spooky.”

“My mind.”

“Your mind.”

The two made their way to the bathroom, opening their goodies and setting up to do each other’s hair. Crystal wrapped a towel around Gigi’s shoulders, knowing her process would be much more time consuming.

“Have you done hair before?” The model asked as Crystal mixed up the bleach.

“For sure, I dyed my hair back to brown so I could look professional when I came here,” she laughed. “I had neon green before, remember?”

“Right!” 

Gigi couldn’t say she wasn’t nervous when Crystal began applying the dye to the ends of her hair, but trusted the designers judgement and vision. It was her fashion show, after all. The older girl worked quickly, yet thoroughly. She was used to working with her difficult curly hair, so it was easy for her to comb through Gigi’s nearly-straight locks. Strand by strand, she painted the bleach on with her gloved hands, unaware that her work was nearly causing Gigi to fall asleep at the calming feeling of her hair being lightly tugged. She model nearly dozed off when Crystal started massaging her scalp to make sure the roots were coated. Finally, Crystal was happy with her work, snapping Gigi back into reality when she placed a shower cap over the models head.

“Sleepyhead, you’ve gotta do my hair now,” Crystal discarded her latex gloves, brushing the back of her hand against Gigi’s cheek. “In half an hour you gotta take a shower with the toner, and then when you’re done, I take a shower and then we both have new hair!”

“I have a suggestion,” Gigi yawned. “Why don’t you keep giving me a head massage and I go to bed?”

“If you want your hair to fall out, sure.”

Gigi rolled her eyes, getting up to open the red box dye. She took out the components, following directions to mix the bottles together and shake it up. Apprehensively, she started squeezing the fluid all over Crystal’s hair and running it through the coils. “Is this right?”

“Just make sure every strand is coated, but yeah!” she smiled at Gigi through the mirror, and Gigi smirked back.

“So, do we need to talk about last night at all?” the model asked as she worked.

“Do you think we need to?”

“I mean, if we’re on the same page, no.”

“Are we?”

“What’s the definition of the same page, then?”

“Um… I liked kissing you?”

“Good, then we’re definitely on the same page,” Gigi blushed. She looked in the mirror for a second and laughed. “I look like a lunch lady!”

“Shush, you look pretty no matter what.”

“Says you, Crystalline Elizabeth.”

“Says the model, Genevieve Regina!”

“Oh. Well.”

“You bitch! You’re supposed to tell me how great I am.”

“Crystal Methyd, you are perfect.”

“I know I am.”

“Who’s the bitch now, bitch?”

This went on as Gigi finished applying the color to Crystal’s hair, placing her own cap over the voluminous mass of hair. Crystal checked the time. “You should go take a shower, Gi. And make sure to leave that toner on for ten minutes!”

“Got it,” she replied as Crystal exited the luxury bathroom into the bedroom. 

“I’ll leave you out some comfy clothes, hm?”

“What, you wanna cuddle and watch movies with me later?”

“Uh… yeah.”

“Thank god. I’ll see you soon,” Gigi leaned in for another quick peck on the cheek, a new habit she’d grown quite fond of. She shut the door and turned on the tap, waiting for the water to warm up before undressing and stepping inside.

Gigi was tired, but the steam against her skin helped balance her energy once again. She removed the shower cap, eyes widening at how light her hair was. She was used to her red hair turning almost-black when wet, but it was now a dirty brown color under the water. The dry strands were a nearly-white yellow. This will take some adjusting to, she thought as she quirted a glob of toner in her hands. She worked it through her hair for a couple minutes, careful to get every last bit. The next ten minutes were spent trying to keep her head out of the shower whilst keeping her body in, which was a difficult task that often left Gigi shivering without the warmth of the water on her body, only to put her arm or leg back in.

The model stepped out of the glass shower into the bathroom that was nearly identical to her own. She wiped the fog away from the mirror and stood, as she did, scanning her body. She was healthy, but extraordinarily petite. Many her size would have bones jutting out, maybe even appearing emaciated, but not Gigi. Her figure was all smooth lines and gentle curves. She had a waist and hips, but they certainly weren’t defined. Her breasts followed the outer curves of her chest, small and close together. She was a model. She looked like a model.

Gigi grabbed a towel once she noticed the goosebumps on her arms, using it to dry off and then wrapping it around herself. She decided to use the hairdryer as well, since apart from her hair taking forever to dry on its own, she wanted to see what it looked like now. As her locks returned to their normal state, Gigi could see that Crystal did a near-perfect job. Her hair was evenly colored a light-barbie-doll blonde all around — not too yellow, not too silver. She certainly looked like a barbie doll. She felt like one.

The girl exited the bathroom into the attached bedroom, calling out to Crystal that she was done. She found a set of satin pajama shorts and a shirt, surprised that the designer owned something so fancy. She changed quickly, feeling more than comfortable in this outfit.

As Crystal took her time in the bathroom, Gigi grew… bored. She felt lonely scrolling through Instagram all by herself, so she shut off her phone and sank back into the couch. Her eyes flickered from the ceiling, to the window, to the TV, and finally, to the bedroom entryway. Gigi wasn’t really the mischievous type, but hey, when in Paris. She smirked as she got up, starting by looking through Crystal’s dresser. Nothing of importance, really: just makeup, underwear (oh hey, those were garters… she wondered what those would look like on Crystal…), stacks and stacks of jewelry. So the model opted to look through the closet, a favorite activity of hers. Crystal’s wardrobe nearly burned Gigi’s eyes out when she first opened the doors. Colors and patterns everywhere, unorganized platform shoes falling over the floor. It was so bad, it was beautiful. Gigi began with the shoes, definitely wanting to steal some of them for herself.

As she got lost in Crystal’s fashion tastes, she failed to hear the shower shutting off and Crystal entering the bedroom, the newly-ginger letting out a yelp as she realized Gigi was there. The younger girl whipped around to see Crystal attempting to cover herself up with her hands, flustered beyond belief at the fact that she was…

butt naked.

[lesyah]

guardian watchthrough stream of consciousness ep. 1

I just started this show and I am going to react to it because I’m like three minutes in and already have thoughts to think

Ok first of all, this dude who’s reporting for duty is so awkward it makes me feel embarrassed

Also the professor was so sweet I like him

When I saw that lady’s tail.................

Idk what to say about that

Someone just turned into a cat

He passed out omg

Very confused rn to say the least

He passed out again omg

They have an office full of people who can do this stuff and just hired some random guy???

BRO the girl died???

Dang

This animated cat HAHA

“Stop vomiting”

Ok let me just stop that’s easy

The way he SPUN to just let it loose sent me tho

WHY IS HE HANGING FROM THE WINDOW LOL

ok that look between them was PACKED

What’s the tea folks

That cat is so cute

What is going on rn

“Dead fatty” HAHAH

I’m very confused.

Those looks said “I know you and am impacted by this exchange.”

And their mouths said “idk u”

Why did the business card say mark Stewart

HUH?????

Oh the girls alive??????????

I thought she was the one who died

Oh I see. Yikes. Poor thing.

Her outfit is literally so cute

Why did he take a picture of her unprompted

The cat is 1000 YEARS OLD??????? literally that’s fire 🔥

Did he just subtly but not so subtly accuse the prof of killing that girl lol

His name is shen wei right????

And the special investigator is zhao something????

MANS REALLY SAID “as a normal person in this crazy world, none of my business”

Shen’s glasses are tight

Why are their interactions so weird

It makes me tense

Also Shen Wei is so CUTE??? Baby face.

UNTRUSTWORTHY

Wow

This kid is not subtle in the slightest

Anyone would know he’s following someone

And he also lost them lol

I love that he took the elderly lady home

Good kid

OH MY GOSH

WTF

ummm that ghost got cake tho 👀🎂

Hold on.

Wtf just punched the ghost

WHAT THEICNEKC

WHAT IS THAT

HAHAGAGA

He called him Pinocchio Hahahaha

Omfg

Cool dude tho

Grandma just went to sleep

I am very very confused

B R O

Bro

BROOOO they knew each other TEN THOUSAND YEARS AGO???!!!!?!!????!!!!!!!!

BROOOOOO

“I hope u still remember our pact”

Cut to 2 mins ago when zhao said “untrustworthy.”

HAHA yikes sorry shen wei

The people in this show aren’t very subtle

He was very clearly spying on Li Qian

Shen Wei even turned around and looked directly at him and he tried to act like he just happened to be there and abandoned his motorcycle hahaha

I love how even 10,000 years ago this dude was still eating lollipops. An icon.

“I feel like we know each other from a long time ago”

Shen Wei:

Shen Wei: maybe we really have met before.....

Zhao: *laughs*

Shen Wei: ...👁👄👁

Zhao: bye

I love how that guy’s impulse when he bumped into the goth was to just wrap his arms around him

When Shen Wei saw that necklace, it got so intense omg

Omg that thing chasing them is so creepy

YO HOW DO YOU JUKE A GHOST????? ICONIC

That hand thing.......creepy. I love it.

“I won’t let it hurt you”

Punches through the door

Freddy Kruger vibes

Where did he go

He just disappeared after getting thrown from the roof. Wtf.

The dude taking pictures and filming LMAO

Ummm prof where did u go

I miss u

Who just flew from the sky with a freaking scythe

Where did shen wei go

The kid clutching the goth guy hahaha

“Where is Professor shen”

He’s just lying there dead like thanks for noticing

Ok episode 1 complete. Thank u for tuning into my brain.

[sadienita]

My Friends as an Idol Group

So instead of writing real stuff I... did this. This is dumb and I’m gonna tag you all but like if this is boring don’t worry you don’t have to read it. I was bored at work and I started thinking about this and then it got really carried away. So anyway, this is 11 of my friends online here and what they would be like as an idol group I promise I am writing things I really am.

I’m just gonna put everything under the cut cuz this got way too long.

@shaylee-summerss-stuff

The oldest

Lead Dancer

Vocalist

Big sister of the group

Takes care of everyone

And they never stop teasing her

She can't catch a break

The curse of being the oldest

Also known for being cute

Fake maknae

Always has to do aegyo on variety shows and the rest of the group swoons

Even if it’s a little embarrassing

It’s absolutely precious

Has this quiet intellectual side that the fans don't always see

But when they do they really appreciate it

Very thoughtful

Very smart

Also so supportive

A lot of the members come to her when they need to talk

Everyone appreciates her so much

@cheesekimpup

Lead Vocalist

One of the group’s composers

As time goes on she has more and more composition and songwriting credits and her songs are b o p s

Grandpa of the group

I'm only half kidding

Cares about the rest of the members to death

Wants to take care of them

Also wants to sleep

Pls let her sleep

Definielty tells them the same story five times

Has said “back in my day” to the younger members

Makes stuff for the others

Gives them cute gifts

She made each of them a playlist and they all love their respective playlists

Has late night life chats with the members

So cuddly with them

A ray of sunshine

She cheers on everything that the members do and is always so happy for them

A pure cinnamon roll

@byeolbitsky

Lead rapper

Dancer

The wild child

So so chaotic

Literally so much fun on variety shows

A chaotic queen

Always so much fun to be around

Also talkative

She has so much to say and will speak her mind

Much to the company's chagrin

Doesn’t get embarrassed easily so is the most fun for challenges

She loves the others

But she will sell them all out for tasty snacks

Good food is a good motivator and hey it makes for a funnier show so it’s a win-win

Has a quiet side fans don't get to see much

But she is super caring

Her members are like family and she wants to take care of them

Will be blunt with them but always tries to be helpful

And they appreciate that she won’t sugar coat stuff too much

And will tell them what needs to be said

@gamerwoo

Lead vocalist

Sub-rapper

Songwriter

Always worried her songs won’t be any good

They are always fantastic

Lowkey queen of duality

Like when she's on stage her aura alone could kill you

And her gaze during photo shoots

She looks so intimidating when she’s intense

But she's actually the softest, shyest bean

Loves when the stylists put her in cozy sweaters

Just loves being cozy

Gets flustered easily

A lot of fun to watch in variety shows because she gets flustered and the others tease her

They make her do aegyo a lot and she dies a little on the inside every time

But everyone else loves it soooo

Can’t catch a break part 2

The others will tease and prank her just for the fun of it

She would stay made but she loves them

She really does have the biggest heart

@minghaoss

Main Rapper

Dancer

Songwriter

So sophisticated

And so intelligent

But also not afraid to speak her mind

Doesn’t let hateful comments get to her

Tells the fans to focus on being the best versions of themselves

And to be kind and open minded with each other

Man you really would be the Minghao of the group

Was the first to break out of the image the company told her to have

Knows what she’s interested in and cares about

And wants to express that

Even if it doesn’t fit her “image”

The fans love that they get to know who she really is

A little sassy

But also so loving

Will roast a member

And then immediately compliment them

So touched when the members or fans do stuff for her

She’s really soft from all the love she gets you guys

@thetypingpup

Leader

Main Dancer

Vocalist

Sub-rapper

Creates a large amount of the group’s choreo as well as participating in song writing

Killer stage presence

Very talented, hard working, and smart

Only her members truly understand how much she really does for the group

Not afraid to argue with the company and attends all the meeting about them

Her members and their well being comes first

Very outspoken and willing to speak her mind as well

She has a lot to say and a lot of interests and loves sitting and chatting with fans about them

Works herself too hard 

Deserves a break

Also tries to take care of everyone

Has one of the biggest hearts ever

@bybangmin

Main Vocalist

Dancer

Songwriter and composer

The groups power vocals right here

Shocks everyone with such a deep voice coming from such a small bean

Also her d u a l i t y

Like a master of girl crush and badass

Everyone is whipped for her

But also so cute

Can easily make everyone’s heart flutter

They have made her do aegyo

She hates it and it’s embarrassing

But it’s also so so cute

Just reminds herself it’s for the fans

Can be quiet at times

But comes out of her shell more and more over time

She’s got some sass

Doesn’t want to sass anyone too much

But will roast the other members

Also a total sweetheart though

Cares about everyone

Always there to listen if you need help

Full of love

@bootyful-seventeen

Lead Vocalist

The grandma of the group

Makes people food

Takes care of them

Wants to rest but will listen to any of them talk about what they’re excited about

Also a whole meme

The one who texts the gc with memes at 3am

Has the most memey pictures of her floating around

Wants to tell dispatch fakes facts about herself just to mess with them

Sky thinks it’s a good idea

Self proclaimed bimbo

Which she brings up every time she doesn’t understand something for a game

Or breaks anything

The fans only call her that because she doesn’t it so much

But they’re so endeared to her

They love her to bits

She’s good to all of her members

Cares about them a lot and always brightens the mood

And if she can’t brighten it she’ll make it weird

Either way it always helps

@svt-mangos

Lead dancer

Has lots of choreo ideas

And slowly starts to help create group choreos more and more

And they’re bomb y’all

A mature bean even if they’re one of the youngest

Can keep a level head

And organize things well

Likes to watch the chaos

Sometimes joins in the chaos

It’s fun and when the others get up to hyjinx

How could you not join in?

Has a cool yet somfy style

But is soft

Loves the other with their whole heart

Thoughtful and creative

Lowkey good at aegyo

But gets really flustered doing it

They others keep saying how much the fans love aegyo until they give in an do it

The members will squeal and scream

The whole ordeal is worth it

Smart and excitable

Loves to share their interests

Loves to hear about other people’s interests

Basically pure sunshine

@curanonemu

Lead Rapper

Sub-vocalist

Songwriter

Gives off a really cool aura on stage

But don’t let it fool you

She’s soft on the inside

Denies it but it’s true

She’s actually precious and that’s a fact

The little shit of the group

The only reason this group doesn’t have a serious case of “maknae on top” syndrome

Loves to tease and prank the other members

Mostly Berry

A lot of the time

But is not above pranking the older members

Thinks it’s funny to tease the others

Won’t ever let them live stuff down

Will roast them

Will probably get roasted but doesn’t care it’s worth it

Very creative

Has lots of ideas about the music and the concepts

And loves getting to voice those ideas

Is thoughtful and can be level headed but can also be very excitable

Precious

@berrynx

Maknae

Lead Rapper

Dancer

Has a very cool style

Killer stage presence and tbh owns every era

Still can’t catch a break

Gets teased a lot

The others won’t let them live

They get flustered too easy

They get called cute and sweet a lot

Get babied by the whole group

Everyone loves to take care of them

The curse of having ten older siblings

Tbh everyone is actually around their finger

But they get teased too much to notice

Is made to do aegyo all the time

They’re too good at it not to make them do it

The others are lowkey protective of them

Especially the older members

They want to keep this lil bean safe

This is dumb but I need to get the thoughts out of my brain literally ignore this part if you want.

Group Name: Eclipse Fandom Name: Soleil Fandom Colours: Pantone 2627 C, Pantone 5395 C, Pantone 9101 C

Their concepts are mature, but not in the sexy sense, in the sound and overall style. Somewhat dark and mysterious. Their sound is whimsical and a little magical but dark and at times and hard hitting with meaningful lyrics.

The group is split into three subunits. 

Umbra: Eros, Ellie, and Min. The more mature of the subunits. They have a dark, more badass concept, but done in a very stylized way. They tackle really difficult topics in their music and the sound is very unique and every evolving but it always retains something that sound like them

Prominence: Sammie, LJ, Rocket, and Pidge. They pull from the more whimsical but dark side of their music. Sometimes they go the direction of uplifting songs but often dip into the mystery as well. They have an overall dark style with their comebacks but it’s got an ethereal feel to it. Their music feels timeless.

Diamond Ring: Sky, Sam, Cura, and Berry. They have a very bright, fun sound. Their music is quick, upbeat, and catchy. Their songs often surround uplifting concepts and their stages are a lot of fun, with cute antics and quick lyrics that still dip into serious topics.

[jungshookz]

ceo!yoongi

→ pairing: min yoongi x reader 

→ genre: ceo!au, clumsy!y/n because that’s always nice, jimin is ur best friend, floofy fluff, a touch of nsfw aka office sex

→ wordcount: 21k+ so u should probably read this using ur laptop and not ur phone

→ note: inspired by my love for an intimidating yoongi in suits 

(gif isn’t mine!) 

(((and the read more function iS there so if it doesn’t work for some reason i am sorry don’t attack me))) 

“shit, shit, shit, fuck- ow, shit- fUCK”

you scramble around your apartment shoving things into your purse while simultaneously dressing yourself

out of all the days to wake up late

why did todAY have to be one of them???

you have your house keys dangling from your mouth while you wiggle into a pair of jeans aNd your phone is sandwiched in between your shoulder and your ear

“the new boss is going to be here any minute now, where the hell are you??”

“obviously i slept through my goddamn alarm, jimin! i- yes, i’ll be there in like… five minutes. i’m on the bus already”

that was an obvious lie because you’re still trying to find a decent shirt to wear

you end up going with a polka-dotted button blouse

“you better hurry, i hear this guy’s a bit of a hard ass. apparently he fired someone who was only two minutes late to-“

“you’re freaking me out, jimin!!!! look, it’s fine he’s probably just going to introduce himself and then hole himself up in his office so he won’t even notice that i’m late”

your own words reassure you and you slow down to take your time in choosing a pair of shoes

“okay, yeah but you’re his secretary, y/n. i think he’ll notice if his own damn secretary isn’T THERE”

…..he has a fair point

“if you don’t get here in the next ten minutes dinner’s on you tonight” the call clicks off and all you hear is the dial tone

by the time you get to the office it’s 9:23 so you’re officially 23 minutes late BUT you made a stop by the starbucks across the street to grab a soy latte for the new boss

the old boss (mr lin - he was pretty chill but he was alSo pretty old so that explains why the company decided to let him go) would forgive you immediately when you presented a soy latte and a muffin to him

you were sure you’d be fine

“ooh, hold the lift, hold the lift!!!!!” you slip right into the lift right as the doors are about to shut and you let out a sigh of relief because you didN’t spill the coffee thank god

“hey, morning” you turn to give a nod of acknowledgement to the (handsome, very very handsome) stranger standing next to you

he’s dressed in a crisp suit and he’s currently scrolling through his phone but he looks up at you and kind of looks you over before humming in response

his raven black hair looks awfully soft and it’s perfectly styled

and whatever his cologne is…. you’re digging it because he smells goOd

you look up at the little screen telling you that you’re only on the eighteenth floor

the office is on the fifty-second floor and this lift is literally as slow as a snail

you then notice that the stranger is also going to the fifty-second floor

huh

a new co-worker!!

so either you wait in awkward silence with this hot stranger or you try to stir up some conversation

“y’know, i hear the new boss is a bit of a prick.” you snort, glancing over at the stranger. he tenses and his eyes leave his phone but he doesn’t turn

“oh, really? interesting” he shifts and tightens his grip on the folders he’s holding

“mm. and i’m his new secretary so hopefully he doesn’t chew me out for being-“ you look down at your watch “28 minutes late”

“his name’s yoongi. min yoongi. even his name sounds snooty, am i right?” you snort, glancing over again and just tryIng to get some kind of a reaction out of this emotionless person “are you, uh, are you new here?”

usually you’re like super charming but it doesn’t seem to be working on this guy

you glance up at the screen again and let out a breath of relief because you’re approaching the fifty-second floor

“it’s not good to be late, but i admit i’m a little behind on schedule as well. and yes, i’m new.”

“we better hurry otherwise mr min’ll have both our heads on sticks!”

“are you late because you stopped to get a coffee and food?” he raises an eyebrow and looks down at the starbucks cup

“hm? oh, well, kinda. it’s more like an apology drink and a chocolate chip muffin for the boss.” you raise the cup and the paper bag slightly “everyone loves muffins”

the elevator dings and the two of you look up

the doors open and you’re surprised to see… what looks like every single employee just standing in front of the doors

the stranger takes a step out but turns around quickly to face you and you’re kind of like ??

“i’d suggest doing a little more research next time, secretary. i’m not a muffin person.” and then he’s walking out and everyone’s bowing respectfully to him as he introduces himself

it doesn’t hit you until the doors slowly begin to close again and the last thing you see is jimin looking at you with so much pity in his eyes

“you’ve got to be kidding me.”

THAT WAS YOUR BOSS

THAT WAS MIN YOONGI AND YOU TOTALLY JUST

you would be so happy if in this moment the elevator just broke down and sent you hurdling down fifty two floors to your DEATH

you freeze when the doors slide open again but thankfully it’s just jimin standing there

“hey buddy” he approaches you slowly as if you were a ticking time bomb 

“hi”

“….so you met mr min i see”

“mhm”

“and i’m guessing u didn’t know that was mr min”

“yes”

“and i’m guessing u tried to strike up a conversation abouT mr min tO mr min”

“indeed”

jimin has to drag you out of the elevator and you’re as still as a statue as he fixes the collar on your blouse and makes sure your employee lanyard is straightened up

“i wouldn’t have gone with this blouse but i suppose this is presentable enough” jimin gestures towards the long hallway leading to yoongi’s office doors (with your cute little station set up by the doors) before he’s giving you a pat on the shoulder and heading back to his cubicle

you know that scene from the shining

the shot where it’s like a long, long hallway and there are those two creepy twins at the end

this is like that except instead of twins you have your new terrifying new boss’ office

you set your bag down on your chair before turning to the doors

you clear your throat a couple times and look down at the latte and the muffin sitting on your desk

maybe he’ll like the latte

so you pick it back up and you give yourself until the count of three

and then you’re knocking on his door and you hear a muffled ’come in’

you take a second to think over what the hell you’re going to say to him

“mr min i am sO sorry i swear i wasn’t trying to offend you i was just trying to be funny because i thought you-“

and just when you thought things couldn’t possibly get any worse

things get worse

because yoongi just so happened to be standing right by the door as you opened it and of COURSE you knock into him causing the lid to pop off the cup and now the two of you are covered in latte but it’s more you than him thanK god

your face is so red you’re sure you’re going to explode

you don’t even know what to say at this point

“i am……. so-“

“sorry? yeah, i’m seeing a main theme here with you.” yoongi scowls and shakes some coffee off his hand before looking down at his stained louis vuitton button up

this was new but it’s okay because he has 10 ten more in his closet

“i’ll pay for the dry cleaning?” is all you can squeak out because you are just so horrified

yoongi rolls his eyes discreetly while he’s patting himself down with his silk handkerchief

what the hell is wrong with you??? you’re not usually this clumsy and you’re sure you’re like 1 more sorry away from getting fired

“can you just send me my schedule for today?” he sighs as he heads back towards his desk “i’m sure it’s easy enough for you to handle” he mutters condescendingly and you know what you totally deserve that comment so you’re fine with it

“yessir” you don’t even bother asking if he actually wanted a coffee or not because you just want to get out of his fiery gaze

surprisingly the rest of the morning goes by pretty smoothly

he came out of the office wearing a new crisp shirt and you were like dAng this guy’s prepared for any situation

unlike you

because you’re sitting here with your cardigan buttoned all the way up to hide the stain

you keep a smile on your face whenever yoongi passes your desk to head back to his office but after you hear his door shut the smile drops and you always let out a breath of relief

he’s just so…. scary

and he’s your age too

if he was a co worker instead of your boss you were 100% sure the two of you wouldn’t get along at all

and you get along with almost EVERYONE

you’ve never been happier when your phone goes off and tells you it’s your lunch break because you just want to rant to jimin and

“turkey sandwich on whole wheat. lettuce, red onions, avocado, chipotle mayo. the place is called the sandwich station. it’s a block or two down. i’d like a green juice to go with it as well- hold the cucumber. they know my order. you can just tell them it’s for me.”

what the

yoongi literally just materialised out of nowhere

“….i’m sorry?”

yoongi clenches his jaw and you want to CRY

“it’s noon. meaning it’s lunch time. meaning i want my lunch.”

the old boss never made you go out to get a fancy sandwich for him

there’s a canteen here for a reason

they’re serving spinach and potato curry today!!!!!!!! which is your favourite!!!!!! and your lunch breaks are only an hour long and by the time you get back the curry will be gone but maybe you can ask jimin to save you a bite

“is there a problem?”

“no! no sir.” you shake your head quickly and get up from your seat “but, um, just to let you know we do have a canteen here if you ever- okay, yep, i’m going”

jimin’s standing by the lift when you get there and he’s like why did you press the down button the canteen is Up you dummy

and you’re like mr min wants a fancy sandwich and a green juice what kind of sane person likes green juice???

jimin promises he’ll save you a bite of the curry as long as you make it back in time aka fifteen minutes before he inhales it all

you say goodbye to each other in the form of air kisses as you walk into separate lifts

so now you’re sprinting down the sidewalk trying to find this damn sandwich place that isn’t one or two blocks away it’s like TWENTY minutes away according to google maps

you would’ve worn a sports bra today if you’d have known you’d be running

by the time you finally make it there you’re all sweaty and red and you can barely speak

“h..hi, a sandwich and a green juice thing for, um, mr min yoongi??” you look at the notes you scribbled down on your palm even though all the words are smudged from your hand sweat “it’s turkey on whole-“

“for yoongi??? coming right up!!!!” the girl at the counter seems a little too enthusiastic to be making a sandwich and a juice for him….. and she’s on a first name basis with him….

but whatever at least she’s being speedy about it

you check the time on your watch

jimin’s probably already eaten everything

your lunch break ends in half an hour and it’ll take you 20 minutes to head back so that leaves you with like ten minutes

maybe you can get a sandwich from here

you look up at the- oH NO way you are not paying tHAT much for a sandwich

this place is bougie

certainly not for someone with your budget

maybe there’s like a hot dog cart nearby

a hot dog sounds good

“here you go! tell him i said hi. i’m lisa, by the way.” she smiles and you give her a smile back as you take the bag from her

you kind of pause to think and you’re like hMm what do you meAn tell him i said hi,,,,,,

does yoongi have a secret sandwich lover

you don’t have time to think because you are reminded that you are running out of damn time

“thanks for being so fast, lisa. uh, here you go. this should cover it.” you throw the bills that yoongi gave you on the counter before you’re zipping out the door and beginning your little jog back

you feel your phone buzz in your pocket and you already know it’s yoongi wondering where the hell you are

you make it back in tEn minutes thank god but your feet are killing you and you’re sure your blouse is drenched in sweat by now

as you’re walking briskly down the hallway you pick up your pace when you see yoongi standing outside his office and leaning against the frame of the door

“what took you so long??”

“i-“

“there’s no excuse” yoongi snatches the bag from you and shuts the door in your face

you can already hear the chatter of people returning from their lunch breaks

aHHHH

your stomach grumbles and it’s your body’s way of reminding you that HEY quit neglecting M E

maybe you should have splurged on a fancy sandwich

you huff and plop down on your seat

now you’re just hangry and the next person who talks to you will FEEL YOUR FIERY WRATH

“by the way- reschedule my meeting with mr kim to next wednesday. he couldn’t make it today.” yoongi opens his door again and takes a sip of his obnoxious green juice

you spin around in your chair

immediately your lips tug up in a bright smile

“yes sir. i’d love to do that for you.” yoongi looks at you weirdly before he disappears into his room again

wow

where was that fiery wrath

that wrath could barely light up a birthday candle sis

about twenty minutes go by and you actually feel like you’re dying because you’re honestly starving so you decide to text jimin and tell him to sneak some food to you

you technically could just get up and go to the vending machine yourself but yoongi could pop out of his office at any minute and if he sees that you’re not at your desk he’ll definitely have your head

so it’s too risky

to: chimchim - be a pal and bring me a bag of chips or something from the vending machine

jimin jumps when his phone vibrates loudly against his desk and he apologises to his fellow cubicle mates before checking the notification

he can’t help but snort after he reads your message

to: y/n - i’m busy! get it yourself

he’s not surprised that you reply almost immediately

from: y/n - too risky!!!! plus you’re closer to the vending machine

from: y/n - just pretend like you need to print something you can come and use ~my~ personal printer

to: y/n - why would i walk across the floor to use your tiny ass printer

from: y/n - PLEASE i am so hungry i will take care of the laundry this week just get me something to eat before my body starts eating itself

jimin immediately gets up from his seat and heads right to the vending machine

he hates doing the laundry

you want to cry tears of joy when you see jimin’s blonde head bobbing down the hallway from where you’re sitting

“don’t accidentally turn all our white sheets pink agaIN” he teases and he tosses you the bag of chips that you open greedily

he’s munching on an apple himself

he’s always been the healthier one out of the two of you

“how’s the boss?”

you’re immediately triggered

“omg i had to go to this dumb fancy sandwich place and pick up an overpriced turkey club and a green juice for him and then one of the sandwich workers was like obViously wanting me to say hi to mr min for her and i was like ?? what do i look like a messenger pigeon or something” you snort and shove a handful of chips into your mouth unattractively 

“and ALSO he totally got mad at me when i got back because i took too long but it’s not my fault your dumb sandwich place is like a million miles away and another ALSO i’m walking in HEELS-”

“you should invest in a pair of flats, perhaps”

wow

there’s something else to add to your already shitty first impression

you swallow thickly when you realise jimin didn’t say that

you turn around slowly in your chair and you’re met with the intimidating gaze of yoongi

….R U KIDDING

why do bad things happen to good people???

yoongi tosses his trash into the bin sitting by your desk before he’s looking up at a terrified jimin

“is there a reason why you’re here, mr park?”

“…i needed to print something” he swallows his bite of apple and hides it behind his back

“do you not have a printer on your side?”

“it was jammed, sir.” 

“what are you printing?”

jimin blanks and all that comes out of his mouth is

“contra..ct. sir.”

“what contract?”

“this one!! this one” you grab a random sheet of paper of your desk and stand up and shove it into jimin’s chest

“yep, this one! i’ll be on my way, thanks for letting me use your printer y/n!” jimin practically rockets down the hallway to head back to his desk

dang

he barely made it out of there alive

he’s never doing that again

there’s a silence between you and yoongi for a couple seconds as the two of you watch jimin bolt away

you turn around a little to face him with a sheepish smile and you wobble slightly on your heels

“can i trust you to be more responsible and do your work instead of complaining to your friend about your awful boss?”

you open your mouth to reply but you dip your head down in shame

yah

you deserve that one

“sorry, sir” you murmur under your breath and you don’t want to look at yoongi because if you do you’ll definitely burst into tears

and your face is sO hot

you look up when you hear the click of yoongi’s door shutting and you let out a breath before sitting down

okay

time to actually work

you’ll find a way to make it up to yoongi

hopefully

the next morning you make sure to set your alarm like an hour earlier than you usually wake up because this day has to go PERFEctly otherwise you will literally stab your eyeball out with a letter opener

yesterday night you already set up yoongi’s schedule for today so that when he wakes up and checks his calendar he’ll know exactly what’s going on

you even memorised his schedule

he has 2 conference calls in the morning (one starts at 8:30 and the other at 10:15) and 2 meetings in the afternoon (one starts at 1:45 and the other at 4:30)

you just want to prove to him that you’re not a total disaster and you’re capable of handling this job

and you made sure to dress yourself up a little more ~professionally~ although it pained you to leave your skinny jeans aside and slip into a pencil skirt instead

you hATe pencil skirts

they’re so tight and after you eat lunch you always feel like your tummy is going to buSt out

so yes you’re wearing a nice white button up long sleeved shirt tucked into a black pencil skirt along with a pair of shiny black heels that you polished last night

you also spray on some perfume and put a little more effort into your makeup

because,,,,, it’s no secret that min yoongi is an attractive man

ahem

you just want to look more presentable!!!

you texted jimin last night and asked if he wanted to get to work early this morning and he was just like lmao who do u think i am

so you pass by his apartment door and stick a note on the front that just says ‘good morning - see you at work!!’

it’s about a twenty ish minute walk and you’re definitely regretting choosing a pair of stiLETTOs to wear

so you take them off and proceed to walk comfortably to starbucks to get yourself and yoongi a coffee

you’re about to ask for a muffin but then you remember that he doEsn’T liKE muFfInS so you stick with a black coffee for him and a caramel macchiato for yourself

of course you’re hungry so you get a bagel for yourself with extrA cinnamon cream cheese

after you get everything you head on over to the building and greet the security guards good morning and they’re all pretty surprised because you’re never here,, so early

your heels click clacking on the marble floor is the only thing that’s heard as you make your way down the hallway to your desk

you check the time on your watch and you’re satisfied with yourself because you still have about thirty minutes until work starts

and you lean back against your chair and you give yourself a mental high five because uMMM,,, you’re kiLLING it and it’s not even 8am yet

you look around and

wow it’s quiet

you can hear the bustling of the city from outside and it’s oddly very calming

you kind of want to fall asleep

plus that bagel really filled u up and you always get sleepy after a good meal

uh oh

okay

look

maybe you can take like

a five minute nap

you deserve it!

you can re energize yourself and then you’ll be even more efficient today

you rest your head on your folded arms and shut your eyes

yeah

five minutes

“good morning, sir”

“morning, mr min!”

“good morning, sir!!”

click

clack

click

clack

your eyes open and your vision adjusts to youryou shoot up from your desk and wipe the drool off the side of your mouth and stand up from your chair immediately

and you glance down at your laptop and see that you didn't take a five minute snooze you took a FORTY minute snooze

thank god you're a light-ish sleeper otherwise yoongi's shoes echoing down the hallway would definitely not have woken you up and he would’ve caught you sleePING

you look up to see yoongi walking down the hallway looking at his phone

so you quickly fix your hair and straighten yourself up

“good morning sir” you clear your throat to get the raspy sleepiness out of your voice and tuck a strand of hair behind your ear

he walks past you and goes straight into his office and you’re about to sit down but then you remember you have a coFfee for him

so you knock on his door clutching his now lukewarm coffee

“i have a coffee here for you, boss” you walk over to his desk and place the cup on his desk

“one cream one sugar?”

uh oh

this coffee is black

“….i will be… right back” and you pick up the coffee and walk out of his room calmly

once you shut the door behind you you’re immEDIATELy zipping down the hallway to the break room

this coffee isn’t even lukewarm anymore now it’s just cold sad coffee

daMN it

it was stupid to buy a coffee forty minutes beforehand

and you can just make coffee here!!!! you dingus!!!!!

so you dump out the coffee and you see namjoon about to pour himself a cup but you slip over and you’re like namjoon sweetie hi good morning can i take that i am sO sorry

and you take the pot from him and refill yoongi’s cup

he just blinks at you because you hand him back an empty coffee pot

“it’s for the big guy you know how it is” and you reach past him to get the cream and a sugar cube and you plop it in and give it a stir

and you pop the lid back on and you’re like thanks joon i owe you big time!! and honestly you were moving so fast namjoon's not even sure what just happened

so you’re practically sprinting down the hall in stilettos back to yoongi’s office and you spot jimin walking out of the lift as you past by and you manage to say goOD morning buddy!!! but all he sees is like a blur and he rubs his eyes

when you get back to the office you’re panting a little but you calm your breaths as you set the coffee down

“one cream one sugar, boss” and you straighten your blouse and clear your throat

yoongi types something out on his phone and blindly reaches for the coffee cup and you gently nudge it towards his hand

he takes a sip and then looks up from his phone and gets his first glance at you for the day and

yoongi chokES on his coffee and quickly sets it down

holy shit

you don’t even look like the same y/n as yesterday

“oh shoot- do you need a napkin?? i’ll get a napkin hold on” and you shuffle out of the room and yoongi isn’t usually like this but he can’t help but let his eyes flicker down because dAmn you look good in that skirt

he thought you looked cute yesterday with your polka dotted blouse and your jeans but today you look so

sexy

god damn

okay

he needs to chill

you’re his secretary

he’s your boss

even more you’re his KLUtzY secretary who spilled coffee all over his shirt and talked smack about him

“…sir?” he snaps himself out of it and looks up and you’re standing over him holding a napkin

he thanks you quietly and takes it from you and dabs at his mouth

okay woO

keep it professional yoongi

“you've got a conference call in twenty minutes. i put everything in your calendar and it should alert you five minutes beforehand but in case it doesn't i'll come in and remind you. i filed the contracts you asked me to sort out yestreday everything's colour coded and also arrange alphabetically so it should be easier to find next time."

yoongi blinks up at you because... what happened to the y/n he met yesterday

“right. yes. good. okay." yoongi swallows thickly when he sees you suck your bottom lip in between your teeth which seems to be a nervous habit of yours "that's all i need from you then. you can go now."

you nod happily and see yourself out

this is a good start 

things are going to be greAT from here

:-) 

so

it’s been about two weeks since yoongi took over the company

and all you have to say is

you want to jump out the window

you want to jump off the fifty second floor of this building because yoongi is working you like a dog

which is something that you obviously aren’t accustomed to because the most rigorous thing you had to do for your old boss was to walk across the floor and get him a snack from the vending machine

but yoongi doesn’t do vending machine snacks because it’s appArently all trans fats

he mentioned it to you when you were scarfing down a little packet of cookies because of course you didn’t have time to get lunch for yourself because you were getting his stupid fancy sandwich like a million miles away

and you were like :) and threw it away and he nodded satisfactorily and then went into his office

and you bent down and picked the packet back up and threw the rest of the mini cookies into your mouth

he’s your boss not your dad

he can’t control your diet!!

omg

you’re so physically and mentally drained

you feel like a husk

your soul left your body the moment you met yoongi and it hasn’t returned ever since

you usually like being a secretary because you like organising things and colour coding things and going like ‘i’m so sorry- mr min will have to call you back’ and slamming the phone down because it makes you feel ~powerful~

but damn

you wish you had applied for an office job like jimin

he works in human resources

you would probably be really good in like finances or some other section like that

of course jimin isn’t paid as much as you’re paid so there’s that

you do want to continue having a roof over your head and food in your tummy so

you grin and bear it

to make a long story short

you strongly dislike yoongi and you’re pretty sure he hates you

here are some more things that have happened in the last two weeks

yoongi told you to photocopy 50 copies of a contract

of course you said yes and you went ahead to your little copying machine and made 50 copies

and when you went back and handed him the copies he looked at them and blinked and then looked at you and he was like this isn't the contract i asked you to copy

and you were like ?? you hANded me the contract

“this isn't the right contract”

“i-???”

“you were supposed to copy this one” and he hands you a DIFFERENT CONTRACT

so you end up shredding 50 sheets of paper and you make a brand new 50 copies and when you give the new ones to yoongi he’s like what took you so damn long??

and you were like

YOU, YOU BITCH

YOU TOOK ME SO DAMN LONG

you wanted to SCREAM

and another time

yoongi was about to go into a meeting but before that he told you that as soon as mr kim calls for him you should tell yoongi immediately

and your concern was that mr kim would call during the meeting and you would have to interrupt the meeting which is noT what you want to do but before you can voice your concern yoongi's like okay peace out i'm leaving now

and of course because the universe is against you

mr kim called during the meeting

so you knocked on the door and opened it and there are like 15 businesspeople just staring at you blankly and yoongi's staring at you blankly at the front of the desk

“sir, um, mr kim called"

and he nods and waves you away so you shut the door

after the meeting ends yoongi literally goes like

you shouldn't interrupt another meeting like that again

and you said that you only did it because yOOngi said to tell him as SOON as mr kim called

“hm. i don't recall telling you that."

you had your hands balled into fists so tightly that your knuckles were starting to get white but of coURse all you say is

“you're right, sir. it was my bad. it won't happen again."

“it better not."

and aNOTHER THING

LISA

lisa the sandwich girl

it's like she's expecting you to hook her up with yoongi

everytime you go into the shop she hands you yoongi's lunch and is always like :) tell :) yoongi :) i :) said :) hi :) and you’re like :) let :) go :) of :) the :) bag :) i :) need :) to :) leave :)

and because lisa is the last thing you're concerned about you never tell yoongi she says hi but you don't need to because lately she's been writing notes on the paper bag like ‘i was going to write a pun about a sandwich but i was afraid you’d find it stALe’

when you read that you were like ?? what does that mean are you saying the bread you used in his sandwich today is stale

one time you decided you'd splurge so you treated yourself to a sandwich from there made by lisa herself

it was,,, the worst sandwich you've ever had in your entire life

the bread was barely toasted

there was like 3 pounds of mayo in there

she was skimpy on the turkey

she placed the tomatoes on the bottom making the bread all soggy

yoongi must really REALLY want to get into lisa's pants if he can continue eating this shit without gagging

the conclusion here is that you hate lisa’s sandwiches but not as much as you hate yoongi

:) and you’re allowed to say that because you’re only saying it to yourself and it doesn’t count if no one else knows about your feelings :)

“we’re going to have sO much fun tonight it’s literally been a century since we last got to go to a club and get wasted!!!!! i even bought a brand new shirt for the occasion.” jimin grins and takes a sip of his juice and you nod excitedly

“i’m so ready to get shit faced let me tell you mr min honestly wants to make me rip my-“

“miss y/l/n.” both you and jimin turn when you hear your name and you’re surprised to see yoongi standing there

why’s he in the canteen he’s never in the canteen

“mr min, what.. can i help you with?” you clear your throat and turn yourself around a little more to face him

“i need you to stay late tonight to reorganise some files that your old boss kept tucked away in the drawers. it’s frankly a mess in there.” you don’t even get a chance to respond before yoongi takes a bite of an apple and strolls away casually

wait what

he can’t just

okay technically he can do that because he’s your boss but

not tonight!!! 

“mr min i don’t-“ you stand up quickly to chase him and he whips around and raises an eyebrow

“is there something wrong?”

yes there’s something wrong

you have plans tonight!!!!!!!!!

you’re going dancing and you’re going to down shots like there’s no tomorrow and you’re going to wake up tomorrow morning with a hangover like never before so yEs there’s something wrong

“…i don’t know if you wanted me to colour code them or arrange them alphabetically.” you breathe out and you feel your soul leave your body

your first night out in weeks and now you have to stay late and arrange dusty old files

“both.”

“of course, sir.”

“i’ll be here to keep you company you can get ‘shit-faced’ another time.”

you’re pretty sure you’re going to burst into tears when you see jimin and a couple other co-workers seemingly having a bLast at the new club downtown from his snapchat story

you let out a grunt as you get up from your knees

you’ve been organising these damn files for like two hours

yoongi was done with his phone call like half an hour ago and then he said he was going to get some food

your stomach grumbles at the thought of food

you h8 your boss with a burning passion

another twenty minutes pass and you’ve never been so relieved in your life when you finALLY are finished with the files

it only took like 30 years to dust things off and then colour code them and then re label them and then arrange them alphabetically

“good job, y/l/n” you give yourself a pat on the back and then plop down on yoongi’s cushy office chair

wow you feel powerful just sitting here

it only takes a second for you to start spinning the chair in circles because this is literally your only form of entertainment for the night

“if you break my chair it’s coming out of your paycheque.” you stop spinning immediately when yoongi seemingly appears out of nowhere

you’re about to apologise profusely and get up but from the way yoongi tilts his head and offers you the smallest of smirks you know you’re not in trouble

“i wasn’t going to break it.” you grumble and you’re about to get off his chair and let him sit but he sits across from you instead

you’re in the boss’ chair and he’s not

how the tables have turned,,,,,,,,

“here. eat. the only place open at this hour was mcdonald’s.”

“you bought dinner for me?”

yoongi plops a paper bag on the desk and your mouth waters when he pulls out a big mac and an order of large fries

“oh gosh, boss. you didn’t have to go all out for lil ol me” yoongi can’t help but smile before he shakes his head and pulls out a miLKSHAKE

“a vanilla milkshake? i thought you weren’t into sugar.”

“it’s for you. i know how much you love anything that rots your teeth.”

oh

that’s like

oddly sweet

but also kind of insulting

but still sweet in his own way

“i also bought a couple beers if you’re interested you won’t get shit-faced like you wanted to but you’ll get a little buzzed.” he pulls a niNE pack of beers out of the bag and cracks one open for himself

at first the meal is kind of awkward

the two of you are kind of just sitting there in silence eating food and drinking

but yoongi breaks the silence when he sees you dip a french fry into your milkshake

what

the

what the fuk

u so nasty

“that’s disgusting.”

“don’t knock it til you try it!” when yoongi opens his mouth to give you another snarky comment you shove a milkshake dipped fry into his mouth

he chews thoughtfully and then swallows

“what do you think?”

it’s sweet

and it’s salty

at the same time

somehow this disgusting combination works

“it’s… it’s okay, but it’s still disgusting.” yoongi mutters and takes a swig of his beer “here, i can’t finish all of these on my own.” he hands you a can of beer and you crack it open

the two of you spend the next hour eating and drinking

halfway through eating your milkshake became yours and yoongi’s milkshake

yoongi’s really enjoying your french fry hack in case that wasn’t clear

you’re really enjoying this beer it’s surprisingly good quality coming from the corner store

“i’m serious! i turned all the white sheets pink because of one red sock and jimin didn’t talk to me for a whole week because the two of us had to come to work wearing matching pink button-ups.” yoongi throws his head back in laughter and you suppress your own laughter by taking another sip of beer

the alcohol coursing through your veins is making you become a little more talkative than usual

“i have a question for you, boss”

“shoot”

“why do you hate me?” you push your bottom lip out in a pout and yoongi looks up at you in surprise as he wipes his hands off on a napkin

“where did you get that idea?”

“because you-“ hiccup “because you’re always so mean to me! like i know i didn’t have a great first impression but you knOw i’ve already apologised like a triLLion times for what i said and you also know i only say things to be funny but you’Re such a meanie-bobeenie sometimes it makes me wonder what the hell i’m supposed to do to make you-“

“y/n, i don’t hate you. i’m just-“ yoongi pauses to think “i’m just like that.”

why was he so mean to you all the time? he didn’t have a particular reason

maybe it’s like that thing where when kids have crushes on each other they’re mean to their crush instead of

wa,,,,,,aaaaaait a second,,,,,

yoongi has to admit he’s taken an iNKLing of an interest in you since your first meeting but it’s not serious or anything

like yes you’re attractive and you’re his type but,.,.,.,.,. ya you’re just his secretary it’s not a big deal he doesn’t like you like that

right

right???

“it’s, uh, it’s getting late - we should probably head home.” yoongi clears his throat and begins cleaning up the wrappers and napkins and ketchup packets

“thanks for treating me to an extravagant meal tonight, mr min. you really didn’t have to.” the two of you step onto the lift and you hit the ground floor level for yourself and the parking lot level for yoongi

“trust me, i did. i know how upset you were about not getting to go out with mr park and the others… and fast food makes everyone feel better. by the way - it’s after-hours. you can call me yoongi - mr min makes me feel like i’ve aged 50 years.” he nudges you playfully and you’re like i should get yoongi to drink more beers if he acts like this from it

and then ur like o wait that’s call alcoholism so maybe not

“touché.” the elevator dings and you look up “this is me! i’ll see you in the morning then, boss.”

before you get off the lift yoongi stops you

“sorry if i’ve been, um, a little hard on you since i started working here. you’re responsible and you’re hardworking i’m glad to have you as my secretary, y/n, even if i don’t show it sometimes. i promise i’ll try to be less of a… as you said, a meanie-bobeenie.”

that was,, unexpected

but aw!!!!

that’s nice of him to say

your lips tug up in a bright smile

“i’ll see you in the morning… yoongi.”you step out of the lift and you wave at yoongi as the doors shut

waking up in the morning for work feels a lot better now that you know yoongi doesn’t actually hate you

although your slight hangover doesn’t feel that great

you keep your sunglasses on when you walk into the office with yoongi’s coffee

and when you knock on his door and enter his office to see him also wearing his sunglasses you can’t help but laugh

“you’re having black coffee today, it’ll wake you up.”

“please tell me i don’t have any meetings today because i feel like death.” yoongi’s voice is all low and raspy and in ur head you’re like [h o ly shit that’s hot]

“i hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you have two. your first one is in ten minutes. and i suggest taking your sunglasses off before you head in there.”

yoongi groans and slams his head down on his desk

the next couple of weeks go by pretty smoothly

aside from like one or two-ish slip ups

“y/n?”

“yes, sir?” you’re about to leave his office after giving him his morning coffee

you were almost late but after you took your heels off in the middle of the street and sprinted back to the office you made it right on time

the downside of getting there on timE is the fact that in your rush you literally forgot to pick up yoongi’s cup of coffee that was SITTING ON THE COUNTER neXT to youRS YOU IDIOT

luckily you picked up a little trick

in case something like this happened, you always bought two cups of the same coffee

like if you spill one cup it’s fine because you still have the other

but in this case you only have one cup

and this is your cup

and it says ‘call me sometime :-) -jungkook’

jungkook is the cute new barista that started working at your starbucks like three weeks ago?? he usually has the morning shift

and yeah you’ve been having fun like,,, flirting with him

because he’s an attractive guy

chestnut brown hair

cute round eyes

adorable smile

and he’s very very verY charming

so SUE you if you’re having a good time!!!! (although you’re like low key leading him on so you better cut it out soon)

but it seems that today was the day that jungkook decided he’d finally make a move

because when yoongi turns his coffee cup and points to the note

you’re like ….:) shit :)

“who is jungkook, and why does he want me to call him?”

“…business proposal?”

“and his form of communication is via paper coffee cups?”

“kids are getting super creative nowadays, boss”

“mm, okay.” yoongi takes a sip of his coffee and lets out a small sigh “you sure this wasn’t your cup?”

“nope. i need at least like five pounds of sugar and creamer in my coffee.” you laugh awkwardly and back up towards to the door “i wouldn’t get the same cup of coffee as you in case… something happened… oH is that my phone ringing pardon me!!” and you slam the door and plop down on your seat and let out a breath

yoongi smiles to himself and shakes his head

but he’s definitely going to need to call this jungkook and tell him to back off

yoongi’s definitely warming up to you

after one of his meetings he passed by your desk and placed a pack of those mini chocolate chip cookies from the vending machine in front of you and you were like gASP a GIFT

“what’s this for??”

“for actually getting to work on time two weeks in a row. keep it up and i might just treat you to a chocolate bar, too.”

one day as you’re coming back from your lunch break you see yoongi at your desk huffing and grumbling to himself

“mr min?” he looks up at you and then looks back down “what are you-“

“i’m trying to photocopy this contract but your stupid printer won’t-“ he pauses to smack the side of it and you gasp in shock because he just whacked your bABY “won’t work!! i think we need to get you a new one.” he scowls and scratches the top of his head

you roll your eyes before gesturing for him to scoot and then bending down to check out how much damage he’s done (somehow he created a small paper jam)

“it’s my printer and it only responds to my magic touch.” you punch a couple buttons on the thing and it sputters for a second before a fresh photocopy comes out the slit “here you go, boss!” you hand yoongi the sheet and he’s like i could’ve done it myself ur printer is just weird and you’re like mMMmm

you sit down on your seat and yoongi’s about to head into his office before

“by the way - i’m going on a date tonight, with lisa. can you jot that down in my schedule? the dinner reservation is at 6.”

“date with lisa at 6” you reply almost immediately and begin typing it out onto his schedule

wait

what

he’s going out on a date?

your heart immediately drops to your stomach

all you typed in was date with lis and you’re getting up and stumbling into his office

you wrap your fingers around the frame of the door and peek in

“boss?”

“mhm” he doesn’t look up at you and you swallow nervously

“what,,, what do u mean you’re going out on a date”

yoongi looks up at you and is like ?

“it’s pretty self explanatory… have you never been on one?”

your cheeks flame up and you’re like “of couRSE i’ve been on one i just-“ you stop yourself and press your lips together because what exactly are you going to say to yoongi

oH i just thought maybe i had a shot with you because we’ve been spending so much time together lately and we’ve gotten preTTy close and i think nO i'm pretty sure i have a teensy weensy crush on you sir but enjoy your date!!!!!

you scratch the back of your neck awkwardly and feel your cheeks flame up at the fact that you…. definitely have feelings for ur boss

but he has feelings for someone else

ouch

“i just… wanted to remind you that you have a skype conference at 10 tonight. i, um, i’ll be working late so if you need help during the conference you know where to find me and stuff. uh, yeah. that’s it.”

“okay. what time is it?”

you peer down at your watch

“5:20. you should probably get going in the next 20 minutes so you won’t lose your reservation”

“mm.”

there’s a moment of silence and you take that as a hint to leave

“y/n, wait.” yoongi lets out a breath and he stops sorting through the papers on his desk

you spin around on your heels and you’re like yes???

“if i’m not back by 9:30 give me a call to remind me about the meeting.”

“yes, sir.” you sigh and shut the door

yoongi frowns once you leave

it'll be fine

he's going to have a great time with lisa

yeah

your chair squeaks under you as you plop down on it and lean back and look up at the ceiling

wow

well

you feel pathetic

what were you thinking?

of course he’s not interested in you

he thinks you’re just a klutzy idiot of a secretary

you thought something had changed between the two of you considering you’d been spending sO much damn time together and honestly speaking you had completely forgotten about lisa

were you really that crazy to think that mAybe there was ~something~ romantic going on between the two of you?

why did you have to be such a hopeless romantic

you definitely need to cut back on the romcom binge-watching sessions with jimin

and now your fukicgn eyes are starting to tear up

great

just gREAT

stop!!!!

no crying at work!!!!!!!!!!! you are a grown woman!! get it together for the love of god

you squeeze your eyes shut and curse to yourself when you feel a hot tear rolling down the side of your face and you use the sleeve of your blouse to dab it away

if yoongi comes out and sees you crying that’d be humiliating

just cry at home like a normal person

you calm yourself and distract yourself by scrolling through and organising your emails

soon enough yoongi’s door opens and he steps out and woW

he looks so dreamy

he fixed his hair and you’re pretty sure he changed into another shirt because this one has no wrinkles

yoongi adjusts his cufflinks before patting himself down to check for his phone and wallet

and before you can help yourself

“you look handsome, mr min.” you immediately look away when yoongi turns to look at you and you’re like hMMm let me take a look at this sticky note that only has a smiley face doodled on it

a small smile tugs at yoongi’s lips when he sees your cheeks warm a little

god u r so ADOrable

no

no! he scolds himself and reminds himself that dating someone you work with never ends well

he has to get over this stupid little crush of his and lisa is the perfect distraction

maybe he’ll end up really reaLLy liking lisa and then he won’t have to worry about you anymore

yep

that’s a good plan

“buy yourself some dinner. i’ll see you later.” yoongi tosses a couple crumpled up bills onto the counter and then he gestures to the hallway and then he’s off

you watch wistfully as he makes his way down the hallway

lisa’s one lucky girl

the next couple of hours really give you some alone time to reflect on what’s happening

let’s see

you like yoongi

a loT more than you thought you did

and he doesn’t feel the same way

nothing ever works out for you in the world of ~romance~

even in high school and college

no one was ever interested in u

and when you thought someone was interested they were actually just being nice to you

of course after you graduated things were a little different

you used tinder and ended up losing your virginity to this guy you’d texted for like a month

he came after like two strokes and then kicked you out of his place and that’s the most romantic thing someone’s ever done for you

great

you’re going to die alone

you groan and pinch the bridge of your nose in frustration

save the tears for home save the tears for home

you’re rarely at the office alone at night

usually there are other people on the level but tonight it’s just you

you would be creeped out but you’re too busy pitying yourself to be scared of any ghosts or demons potentially haunting the building

you finished work earlier than you thought you would and you were tempted to leave because you have nothing else to do but you told yoongi you’d be here

maybe he’ll give you a small raise for being such a loyal secretary

you just finished your dinner (fish tacos and french fries from the food truck across the street) and you’re just aimlessly scrolling through your facebook feed

it’s about 8:15 when you hear the faint ding of the elevator and you perk up

and then you hear yoongi

you recognise the sound of his walk

why did he come back so soon his meeting isn’t for like another hour and a bit

you get up from your chair and straighten yourself out and look up as yoongi approaches your desk

“back so soon?? it’s only- oh my goD” yoongi’s grumbling to himself while dabbing at his shirt that has a huge splatter of wine on it

yikEs

no wonder he’s back

it’s fine you’ll get him another shirt and he’ll head back to the restaurant

how did he pour sO much wine on himself

“i’ll get you another shirt, boss”

you immediately go into his office and grab a crisp shirt for him from his little closet

you walk out and

oh sweet baby jesus

you squeak and instinctively cover your eyes as your cheeks flush because

yoongi is shirtless

“sorry, i just wanted to get as much of it out as possible” yoongi’s not looking at you but that’s good because now you’re basically gawking at him

he has his shirt on your desk and is rubbing pretty hard at the purple stain

he’s kind of bent over and you can see his bicep flex every time he wipes

and o hl o r d

his back muscles,,,,,,,,,,,

“are you, um, is lisa waiting for you at the restaurant? did you just come back to change?”

yoongi pauses

“she went home. the date didn’t work out. there was no spark. the meeting is more important anyways” he grumbles before getting up and looking down at the shirt

“what- you don’t have to answer this if you don’t want to but what… happened on the date?”

yoongi sighs as he slips into his shirt and you’re about to apologise because it’s really none of your business but then he speaks up

“i don’t wanna get too into it, but the gist of it is that she kinda just wanted me for my money and then when i accused her of that she threw her wine all over me” he shrugs as if that’s the most casual thing to happen ever

oh dang

that’s rough

that sucks!!!! lisa sucks!!!!! what sane person would be perfectly fine taking advantage of someone like that??

(you hated lisa the moment you met her)

“oh… i’m sorry, that sucks” is all you can manage because you’ve never been good with comforting people “if it… makes you feel any better i think her sandwiches are put together pretty sloppily i mean i could probably make better sandwiches with my feet”

that gets a laugh out of yoongi and he shakes his head

“yeaH i’m definitely going to take a break from sandwiches for a while”

he buttons his shirt up and fixes the collar before he moves past you and into his office

meanwhile you fold up his stained shirt and tuck it into your purse so that you can drop it off at the dry cleaners tomorrow

you figure you’d give yoongi a little alone time

you want to comfort him but you don’t know how

so you distract yourself by making a cup of coffee since it’s already pretty late

“you want a cup of coffee? i made extra” you poke your head into yoongi’s office and raise your brow when you see he’s not sitting at his desk

“i could use some caffeine.” yoongi’s standing at his closet and is currently trying to tie his tie but his fingers are not cooperating with him and he’s clearly struggling

you’re about to go and get his coffee but then you hear him mumbling about how dumb ties are and you can’t help it you need to help him out

“here, let me,” you click over to yoongi and slip in between him and the mirror before reaching up to fix his tie

he stares down at you as you wrap the blade around the tail of the tie and a fond smile twitches at his lips

there’s something different about you but he can’t point out what it is

your brows are knitted together in intense concentration and

wow you’re cute

“once around…” you mumble to yourself and pause, tilting your head in confusion

that doesn’t look right

“oh, wait. twice! twice around, sorry” you adjust the tie slightly and make sure it’s not so tight so that’s it’s cutting off his breathing lol

“twice around…” yoongi breathes out and his head lowers a little when you yank on the tie gently to tighten it

your eyes flicker up and your cheeks immediately flush when you realise how close you are to yoongi right now

you’re basically pressed up against the mirror and you’d only have to take like half a step closer and your nose would be touching his

you don’t know what it is but you find yourself tugging on his tie and pulling him down so that you can press your lips against his

yoongi’s eyes widen in surprise but his lips are moving on their own accord

and for the first time evER

yoongi’s heart flutters in his chest

he’s never felt this way before

not even with lisa

your lips are so unbelievably soft

yoongi can taste the strawberry chapstick that he sees you apply all the time and he can’t help but suck your bottom lip in between his teeth

and when you let out a little moan of his name his hands itch to pull you closer because god daMn…

and then it hits you

you’re kissing yoongi

you’re kissing your boss

you’re not just kissing him you guys are fully making out

RED ALERT

what the hELL R U DOING

you immediately pull away and you are just,,, mortified

just because u haven’t gotten laid in like idk 8 months doesn’t mean you can go around KISSING anyone you like

get your hormones in check girl!!!!!!

this is not the way to comfort someone!!!!!!!

“oh shit- that wasn’t- i’m so sorry, i, uh- i don’t know why i did that but-“ yoongi’s about to speak up to calm you down and tell you it’s okay but then the skype ringtone echoes from his desk and the two of you are reminded that he has a very important conference call “okay, i’ll be out there, um, have fun??” you bolt out of the room and shut the door behind you and uGHHHH

for about forty minutes you’re just stewing in your own humiliation as yoongi takes his call

meanwhile yoongi can barely focus on what he’s talking about because all he can think about are your lips and how sweet you taste

you realise you’ve spent the last ten minutes just staring at a blank word document because all you can think about it WHY DID I DO THAT

you hear yoongi saying goodbye to whoever he’s talking to and you slap your face gently a couple times to snap out of it

maybe you can just act casual about it

haha yeah bro we just kissed but it’s fine it’s totally normal i kiss jimiN all the time

okay that’s not a very good approach to the situation

you don’t get a chance to come up with another brilliant solution because yoongi’s office door opens and he steps out before switching the lights off and tucking his phone and wallet into his back pocket

“c’mon, i’ll drive you home”

wha,,,, you don’t think you can survive a car ride home with yoongi because you’re still mortified about what happened

and he’s not bringing it up either so maybe he just wants to forget about it too

“oh, no, it’s alright! i can take the bus home”

“it’s a little past midnight it’s not safe. don’t be stubborn.”

“i’m not being stubborn! seriously, it’s fine” you wave him off before pointing to your laptop “i have some work to do anyway”

yoongi bends down to look at your screen and raises an eyebrow

“this is an empty word document.” he stands back up and looks down at you before nodding his head over to the hallway “pack up your stuff that’s an order.” he switches your desk lamp off for you before he’s walking towards the elevators and well you don’t have a choice now so

you shove everything into your bag and grab your cardigan off the back of your chair before quickly jogging over to the lift

the two of you step in and you’re standing so close that your arms are pressed together

but neither of you seem to be moving away

interesting

the two of you stare up at the little screen showing the descending floor numbers

“i’m perfectly capable of taking myself home”

“i’m aware”

“so i’ll just take the bus then?”

“nope”

“mr min “

“yoongi. it’s after hours. you can call me yoongi, y/n.”

((his name is cute to you for some reason))

“yoOngi. i don’t want to inconvenience you, sir. my place is like a twenty-minute drive away and your penthouse is like five minutes “

“it’s not an inconvenience. come.” you figure there’s no use trying to argue with yoongi

he pretty much always gets his way no matter what

maybe that’s why he’s so rich

you trail behind him and he unlocks his car (it’s a sleek black range rover!!!!!!!!!) and he gets into the driver’s seat while you slip into the passenger seat

“are you sure about this, yoongi? i feel bad because you’ve already had a bad night like don’t feel obligated to drive me home because i helped you tie your-“

“i’m literally not even listening to you right now” the engine purrs to life and yoongi pulls out of his spot

he has his sleeves rolled up and his tie is loosened and his hair is kind of messy probably from him running his hand through it (a nervous habit you’ve noticed he has)

…..god he looks sexy

it’s also pretty late and his voice has gotten slightly raspy and is like an octave lower

your mind wanders and you find yourself wondering what he’d sound like while

omg get urself together

you’re tempted to just not say anything for the entire duration of the ride and just let the radio do the talking but

“…so you really don’t know how to tie your own tie?” yoongi smiles at your question as he keeps his eyes on the road

“it’s too much effort, tying a tie. that’s why most of mine are those clip-on ones” he admits and your mouth drops because LoL you have this professional ceo who terrifies everyone and he uses lil clip-on ties like a little boy

“clip-on ties??? omG that’s so adorable you’re so cute” you blurt out as you laugh at him and yoongi glances over at you for a second before he shakes his head and laughs along

the rest of the ride to your place consists of you sharing funny stories and yoongi mostly listening and focusing on driving but he laughs a lot and you feel good because you think you’re making him feel better about the she who shall not be named situation

((lisa doesn’t deserve him anyways))

lisa is the last thing on yoongi’s mind because of you

:-))

he never really liked those sandwiches anywho

you feel kinda sad when he rolls up to the front of your building because you guys were having such a nice time

like you’ve literally never been so casual with yoongi before

you like spending time with him

…you like him.

that was probably pretty obvious considering you kissed him

he hasn’t brought it up,,,,,, which is kind of concerning but

knowing yoongi he’s acting professional about it

“thanks for the ride, yoongs.” the nickname slips out accidentally and you look up to make sure he’s not like disgUSted with the new nickname you’ve given him

“c’mon, i’ll walk you to the door”

he gets out of the car before you can protest

you hop out and shut the door behind you and he locks the car

“thanks for everything, by the way. i enjoyed your company tonight.” yoongi murmurs and in the dim streetlights you can see his cheeks go a little pink

“i know. i’m amazing company, what can i say?” you joke and yoongi rolls his eyes because of coUrse you would say something like that “i hope i made you feel a little better.”

“you did” the two of you stop in front of the entrance and you turn to face each other

“good! that’s good. well,,,,goodnight, boss” you’re about to zip right into the building but you’re stopped by yoongi tugging on your wrist causing you to spin around and all of a sudden you feel yoongi press the ~softest~ kiss to your cheek

aaAHHHHHHHHHHHH

“goodnight, y/n.” yoongi smiles kindly at you and you beam at him with pink cheeks before you nod and go inside

you can feel his gaze on you as you wait for the lift and you’re bouncing on your toes for some reason

you feel super jittery and you want to scream so loudly but it’s like 2am lol

the next morning you have a pep in your step and jimin’s like omg slow down i know you’re happy about the whole yoongi thing but i have short legs!!!!!!

your arm is linked with his and you’re basically dragging him down the street so you slow down and you’re like sorry i’m just,,,,, really happy,,,,,

jimin lets you get away with it because he knows you haven’t gotten some romantic action in a while

and suddenly your happiness is replaced by nervousness the moment you see yoongi

jimin yelps when you duck behind the corner and yank him with you

you listen for the ‘ding’ and you peek out from behind the corner to make sure the elevator doors have closed

“what was that????”

“i….,.,, i don’t know!!!” you snap and walk over to the lifts and push the up button quickly

“i thought you and yoongi had a greAT time yesterday so why’d you basically piss yourself when “

“i don’T KNOW STOP YELLING AT ME”

jimin takes that as a hint to stop and the elevator ride up is silent

you’re so flustered you forget to blow jimin an air kiss and he’s like okay now i look like boo boo the fOOL blowing a kiss to nobody

you plop down on your chair and put your purse under your desk and let out a breath

okay

whatever that panic attack was

it can’t happen again

how are you supposed to act around yoongi now??

you kissed him

he kissed your cheek

you guys had a great time

should you act more casual around him???

maybe you should ask him if he wants to go out for lunch

or is that too much too soon

oh god

“good morning, miss y/l/n.” you jump when yoongi walks past you and into his office

“good- hi, good morning boss!!!” you say a little too enthusiastically and you clear your throat

you stand up and clutch your iPad to your chest and waddle into his office

you curse to yourself and lean down to adjust your heels

“you surprisingly don’t have any meetings today but you do have to look over the rewritten company policies after that- um, incident that happened on the 45th floor and the financial precinct”

“okay. what’s for lunch today?”

“what’s for-“ oh no you weren’t prepared for this what’S THE PLAN Y/N WHAT’S THE PLAN “lunch is… with me. you’re having lunch with me.” is what you blurt out and you press your lips together when yoongi looks up from his phone and gives you this…. look  

“unless you… unless you want a… sandwich or something i “

“where are we eating lunch?”

oh okay he wants to eat lunch with you that’s a good sign

“i’ll get some takeout for us? there’s a really good sushi place a couple blocks “

“okay. you can use my card. i like the spicy tuna rolls with those crunchy bits sprinkled on top.”

“okay! okay okay that’s- yes, those ones are nice. how does lunch at 12:30 sound?”

“mm.” yoongi scribbles something on a post-it note and you take that as a hint to get the heck out

you shut the door behind you

okay

so is yesterday just going to be an unspoken thing

fine

you can do that

whatever

keeping it casual

you can keep it casual

you’re as cool as a cucumber

you’re as cool as the sunglasses guy emoji

B-)

coolcoolcoolcoolcool

jimin pouts a little when you tell him you’re not joining him for lunch but when you say you have a lil sushi date with yoongi he’s like……. hmmmmmmm okay i’ll get over it :-))))))))

the sushi place is a couple blocks away

and to get there you have to pass by the sandwich place which isn’t a big deal

and when you get there you’re about to just keep walking because who cares about sandwiches anymore but

well you can’t help yourself

:-)

you walk in and lisa looks surprised to see you

“lisa.” you smile at her and then look down at the display case

“y/n! i, um, hi. hey. what can i get for you?” she scratches the back of her neck and can’t seem to keep eye contact with you

in fact she seems to be a little scared

now you know how yoongi feels

being powerful…… makes you feel niCe

“i’m in the mood for… a nice, hot cup of tea.” lisa nods quickly and punches a couple buttons on the cash register

“english breakfast or green?”

“english breakfast, please.” you hum and rummage through your purse for your wallet and hand her a couple of coins and then you go over and wait for it on the side

but you’re not just here to get a cup of tea

oh nonoOonononono

“y/n, here’s your tea!” lisa chirps happily and hands you your cup of tea with a smile

“thank you,” you take a tiny sip and then purse your lips and lisa’s like !!! what’s wrong??

“oof, i hate to do this.” you sigh and shake your head “but could you add a little more cream and a sprinkle of go fuck yourself?”

“sure i’ll just-wait w-what?” lisa looks up at you with wide eyes and you stare blankly at her

“…a little more cream and sugar?”

you hand her your cup and she nods quickly and adds in a splash of cream and even stirs it for you the polite little thing

“h-here you go, y/n”

“thanks lisa.” you begin walking away but you turn back to look over your shoulder “have a wonderful, gold-digging day!”

lisa grows pale

you dump the tea into the bin the moment you leave the sandwich place and head straight for the sushi place

you give yourself a high five for avenging yoongi in your own twisted way

“i’m bAck and i’m ready to eaT” you shut the door behind you as you enter yoongi’s office and frown when you see him typing an obviously angry email

now the past y/n would’ve immediately excused herself and then leave the room but for some reason you feel like,,,, you’re the one holding the power

maybe you’re still on a high from your encounter with lisa

so instead of being like oH i’ll just come back in a sec you stroll over and shut yoongi’s laptop and then hand him a pair of chopsticks

“i was in the middle of something.” his eyebrows knit together and he’s about to open up his laptop but you use the chopsticks to gently whack his hand and he flinches

“i’m aware” you wave the chopsticks in front of yoongi and he sighs and takes it “but the only thing you had today was half a cup of coffee. so we’re going to eat and then maYbe i’ll let you get back to work”

you take a seat and proceed to take the takeaway containers out of the flimsy plastic bag and yoongi’s just sitting there like since when did you become so,,,,, bold

“a spicy tuna roll with the crunchy tempura bits on top for you and a dragon roll for meEE” yoongi perks up when you pop open the lid of your styrofoam box

damn

your roll looks rly good

he looks down at his own spicy tuna roll

sure he likes spicy tuna but he’s not in the mood for raw fish today

hm

“what’s in your roll?” yoongi raises an eyebrow when he sees that you’ve already shoved a roll into your mouth

the way your cheeks are filled resembles a chipmunk and he waits patiently for you to chew and swallow

“nice to see that you’ve got the eating abilities of a three-year-old toddler”

you roll your eyes and ignore his comment

“it’s tempura shrimp and cucumber on the inside and then avocado on top with a drizzle of spicy mayo i think” you pick up a sliver of ginger and pop it into your mouth and chew thoughtfully

meanwhile yoongi takes half a bite of one of his rolls and decides he’s over it

it’s good but it’s not tempura shrimp and cucumber with avocado on top and a drizzle of spicy mayo

“you forgot to shut the door.” yoongi uses his chopsticks to point over your shoulder and you immediately turn around and get up

didn’t you shut the door when you came in??

once your back is turned yoongi reaches over and snags one of your rolls before shoving it into his mouth

holy shit

this is SO GOOD

when you walk over the door… is closed

“the door wasn’t open” you walk back over and take a seat

yoongi swallows his bite and shrugs “sorry, my bad.”

okay he was originally just going to eat one and be done with it but he wants another one

“is that your phone ringing outside?” yoongi stops eating and leans forward a little bit as if listening to something

you turn back again and look at the door and try to hear for your ringtone

“i don’t hear anything”

“you don’t??” yoongi grabs another roll from your box and shoves it into his mouth

“do you think i’m going deaf or something because i seriously can’t hear a thing” you turn back just in time to see yoongi shoving one of yOUR rolls into his mouth

“did you just-“ yoongi wipes a dot of mayo off from the corner of his mouth and then swallows

you look down at your roll and count in your head

you only ate 1

but 3 of them are missing

omg

you look up at yoongi slowly and he takes a sip of water

“…yOU!!! you THIEF!!!! that’s not fair now you have to give me two of yours so we’re even” you reach over with your chopsticks and gawk at yoongi when he blocks your chopsticks with his own

“you don’t have any proof”

“i saw you with my own eyes yoONGI”

next thing you know the two of you are fighting with your chopsticks and using them like swords

it’s when a droplet of soy sauce almost stains yoongi’s dress shirt that he stops whacking his chopsticks with yours and holds a hand out to stop you

“tell you what-“ he leans forward as if negotiating some sort of business deal “you give me your dragon roll.” and then he doesn’t say anything else

“…and???”

“that’s it. you just give me your dragon roll.” the playful glint in yoongi’s eyes tells you he’s just kidding but you can’t help but scowl at him anyways

“you’re a lousy negotiator how the hell’d you become a ceo??” you end up sacrificing your dragon roll and yoongi gives you his spicy tuna roll which honestly is also pretty good

at the end it’s worth it to see yoongi humming happily as he chews thoughtfully

he’s so cute uWu

yoongi, to put it bluntly

is completely and utterly fucked 

he like

kind of wants to bring up what happened between you two

but he also doesn’t know how

because he’s never been in thiS kind of situation before

so the kiss is kind of just a thing that’s been hanging in the air but the two of you act like nothing happened

uGh

all this relationship drama makes him feel like he’s in high school again

he just!!!!!!! wants to do something!!!!!!!! but he doesn’t know what to do!!!!!!!!

so when yoongi gets an email about the yearly company gala

a lightbulb appears above his head

“y/n i need you in my office” yoongi walks past your desk and into his office and you quickly spoon the rest of your rice into your mouth before wiping your mouth with the back of your hand and going in

“what’s up? um, i mean- what can i help you with?” you clear your throat and lick over your teeth in case there’s any food stuck in between your teeth

yoongi sits down and leans back against his chair while keeping his eyes on you

“you’re coming with me to the gala tomorrow night”

oh what

you squint your eyes slightly and wait for him to be like lolz just kidding get back to work

but he never does that

you’ve never been to a company gala before

your old boss had a wife so it’s not like he had to ask you to accompany him

“you- me? you want me to come with you to the “

“we’ll leave after work tomorrow, so make sure you bring something nice to change into.” yoongi’s flipping through some papers on his desk and he reaches up to lick his finger before swiping to the next page

“sir, you don’t think it’s a little bit-“ your phone rings outside and you turn to look at the door before looking back at yoongi “-it’s a little bit weird for you to be showing up with your secreta-“

“go and pick up the phone. might be an important call.”

okay well

apparently you’re going to a gala now

tomorrow comes a lot sooner than you thought it would because the next thing you know work is over and you’re changing in the disabled washroom with jimin as your lovely assistant

“c’mon, suck it in” jimin grits his teeth as he tugs at the zipper of your dress “i told you to go for that blue one”

it’s a little black dress

off the shoulder

sweetheart neckline

it ends a little above your knees

“but i’ve never worn this dress before and i wanted to take it out for a spin!!” you wiggle your hips to try and help jimin and he lets out a breath of relief when he finally gets the zipper to zip up in one smooth movement

now you know why you’ve never worn this dress before

it’s so damn tiGHt

well honestly it’s not that bad but it’s just,, tighter than things you usually wear

at least your boobs look perkier

“if you bend down, this thing is going to bust open” jimin snorts and bends down to help you into your heels and he scowls when you put your hand on top of his head to keep yourself from toppling over

“how does it look?”

“it looks good, you look sexy” and sure you’re just friends with jimin but that comment gets your cheeks to flush a little bit and you can’t help but bite back with a “keep it in your pants, park” and he raises his hands in defence

“alright, you go and enjoy yourself at a fancy ball while i go home and pig out in front of the TV” jimin sighs dramatically and you laugh but give him a quick kiss on the cheek before leaving the washroom

you keep your eyes down as you click past the cubicles because you can feel everyone just staring at you and you hear jimin go like “i know her ass looks good but keep talking about her like that and i’ll knock u out” in the distance

you knock on the door to yoongi’s office and let yourself in and

wOOF

you see yoongi wear suits everyday but for some reason tonight he looks ten times more expensive

his hair is styled to perfection

his lips look extra pouty and when he licks over his bottom lip and moistens it you audibly swallow

there isn’t even one wrinkle on his shirt

not only does he look sexy he also smELLS sexy

the entire room just smells like yoongi

he’s on the phone and is scribbling something down so he doesn’t notice you yet

“yes, i hope to hear from you soon.” he has his phone sandwiched in between his shoulder and his ear as he adjusts his cufflinks and woW you are totally heart eyes emoji right now “take care.” he hangs up and gets up from his seat while looking for his keys “ready to go?”

“yep! let’s get a move on because i don’t know how long my feet are going to last in these heels”

yoongi’s hand stops searching and his eyes flicker to your heels and then his eyes slowly trail up your legs and the rest of your body

holy

sh…it

“you clean up nicely” is all he can say because words cannot describe,,, how sexy you look to him right now

okay calm down yoongi find ur keys don’t gawk at ur secretary

he finds his keys and tucks them into his back pocket but then he’s like oH hold on before i forget come here

and he rummages through his bag and pulls out a velvet box from fuckign cartier

“this is for you. for tonight.” he opens it and your eyes nearly pop out of their sockets at the sight of this gorgeous diamond necklace and you don’t even get a chance to protest before yoongi’s taking it out and moving behind you to help you clasp it on

you reach up and pinch the diamond charm between your fingers and then you turn to look at him over your shoulder and you’re like yoongi i can’t just accept a diamond necklace from u

“fine i’ll take it out of your paycheque”

“yOONgI”

“i’m kidding i’m kidding c’mon let’s go”

the car ride there consists of you humming and bopping along to whatever song is playing on the radio

yoongi calls you out on not knowing the lyrics and you’re like u know whAt i could just leave you at this gala thing and go home

“then i’ll fire you”

“you’re mean”

“i’ve been called worse.”

“by who??”

“by yoU”

lolz

when you guys get to the gala

all you can say is woW because WOW

you’re parked across the street from this huGe mansion that literally looks like the white house

“a bug is going to fly into your mouth if you keep gawking like that” yoongi places a hand on the small of your back and walks you across the street and you feel all tingLy

“are you kidding me yoongi do you sEE this place it’s HUGE”

“there are like 1000 people here of course it’s huge”

welp

that just adds to your anxiety

you clutch your purse tightly when you see some very veRy fancy looking people walk past you and into the building

you really don’t belong here

and it seems like yoongi can read your mind

“don’t worry, y/n. i’ll be glued to your side all night.”

“and why is that?”

“so i can make sure you don’t accidentally knock something expensive over.” the two of you make your way up the stairs and your feet are already beginning to throb from your stilettos

“you know what i’m not thAt clumsy” right as you finish saying that you stumble a little over your heels and yoongi’s grip around your waist immediately tightens

“…you were saying?”

you clear your throat and grab his arm and drag him into the building

this is…. this interior looks like it was ripped straight out of some kind of fairytale

huge glass chandeliers

marble columns

waiters and waitresses evErywhere

their uniforms look more expensive than your entire existence

and then you spot it

the f o o d table

“oh my god i see tiny baby sandwiches” you gasp and immediately head for the sandwiches and but yoongi grabs your wrist and tugs you backwards “whAt are you doing i’m so hungry i’m going to eat like 100 of those let me gO- “

“mr min! it’s so nice to see you!” you shut up immediately when the two of you are approached by an older looking couple and you put on your polite smile

“mr lee. it’s nice to see you again.” yoongi gives him a firm handshake and then turns to his wife “mrs lee- looking lovely, as per usual.”

“still charming, i see!” and you’re tempted to be like lol yooNgi??? charming??? wheRE

“and who’s this lovely lady?” the man smiles at you and you’re like whoops time to introduce myself

“oh, i’m y/n! i’m mr min’s secreta-“

“date. she’s my date.” yoongi wraps an arm around your waist and draws you in nice and close and you’re like ! ? ! ?

y/n.exe has stopped working

okay okay coolcoolcool keep it casual nice and casual

anyways you shake the guy's hand and you shake his wife’s hand too and offer her a smile

“gorgeous necklace! who gave it to you?”

well

time to keep it casual

“yoongi did!” you pat his chest gently “he knows i have expensive taste even though i’m only worth like 50 cents and a pack of instant ramen.” everyone laughs and yoongi laughs along too but he’s not really focused because he’s just so,,, entranced by you

you’re so unbelievably charming and witty

and god you look good tonight

you look like a million bucks even though you told him you got your dress for 70% off the original price

“could you excuse us for a second? i need some alcohol in my system otherwise i don’t know if i’ll be able to survive tonight.” you excuse yourself and yoongi from the couple and link your arm with his and now he’s like ! ? ! ?

“buddy system, yoongi. you can’t lose me in this crowd otherwise you’ll have to find a new secretary.”

“i don’t see the problem with that.” he earns a slap on the arm for that comment and he can’t help but smile at the way you scowl at him

you hand yoongi a flute of champagne and pick one up for yourself and the two of you clink glasses before taking a sip

ahHhHHHH

this shit tastes frickin expensive

it’s like liquid gold

you’d drink the whole bottle if alcohol poisoning wasn’t a thing

“you should take me to more of these things” you hum and take another sip before wiping off a bit of your lip gloss staining the rim of the glass

“and why is that?”

“not only am i greAt at charming people i also happen to really really like champagne” you tsk and yoongi laughs lightly

“charming people? ah, yes. as proven by what you said when we first met.” 

“okay but if you weren’T min yoongi and you were some other person you totally would’ve thought what i said was charming”

“touché.”

the two of you spend the next half an hour just talking to each other

you’re having such a good time

yoongi’s a great person to talk to and with every passing minute you find your fondness of him growing and growing

you

are

so

whiPPEd

and with alcohol running through your veins you feel,,, a tad more confident

the buzz makes you feel giDDY

so you reach over and fix a strand of yoongi’s hair “i didn’t know this was a date, by the way.”

yoongi’s not surprised that you’re touchy when you’re tipsy

“what are you talking about?”

“i thought i was here as your secretary!!!!”

“you’ve never been on a date before and i’m a good samaritan who loves giving to charities”

“wha- i’VE BEEN on a dATE BEFore!!!” you scowl and yoongi rolls his eyes playfully “okay well it was more like a hangout with a bunch of friends but i really liked the guy and i think he liked me back and you know what he sat next to me when we were watching a movie so-“

“you don’t have to come up with a crazy story to try and convince me that you’ve gone on a date - this is your first date, and it’s with me.” he shrugs and downs the rest of his champagne “i have to go and talk to someone, will you be alright alone?”

“why can’t i come with you?” you whine and lean against yoongi a little and you’re a little too tipsy to notice his cheeks flare up

“because they’re all going to look at you like a piece of meat and i’d rather that didn’t happen.” you look over your shoulder and see a round table with a bunch of older men

your heart feels a lil fuzzy at the realisation that yoongi is,,, being very very protective of u

hm

yoongi hands you another flute of champagne and sets your empty glass down “you’ll be fine in the VIP section just enjoy the drinks and don’T move from this spot”

“but i don’t wanna stand here-“

“i’ll only be like 10 minutes, you whiney baby. here-” when you open your mouth to speak he pops an olive puff into your mouth and then pats your cheek and slips past you

you want to pout but it’s hard doing that when there’s foOd in your mouth so you just watch yoongi as he walks away

of course he turns back to glance at you and gives you a warning look that says if you move from ur spot i’ll shank you

you hate being alone at parties and now you’re alone at this fancy gala

so you resort to your usual solution

scrolling through your phone while standing by the food and drinks

about five minutes pass and you’re already getting bored of the tetris game you’re playing

and then you hear two voices belonging to two girls and they’re standing a little distance behind you

“you think she fucked mr min so she could come here? i bet i could’ve fucked him better.”

oh

oh hELL no

you would nEVER do something like that to get a job you’ve always believed in earning a position through hard work and determination

you want to turn your head and look at the two girls and confront them but you also want to hear what else they have to say

“oh, definitely. what a slut! fucked her way to the goddamn top. that’s how this business works when you’re desperate, i guess.”

you’re clutching your flute of champagne so tightly that your knuckles are starting to get white and you’re surprised the glass hasn’t cracked from the pressure

you can feel your entire face burning up with humiliation and you try to calm yourself by taking a sip of champagne but even good ol bubbly can’t help you

god

this was a mistake

you should have turned down yoongi

“the point is that she doesn’t belong here. especially in the VIP section with us??”

they’re right!!!! u don’t belong here!!!!!!! you are noWhere as rich and successful as these people,,,, you’re tempted to just ditch yoongi and go home

“that dress was a choice. this isn’t a strip club, honey.”

“god, look at her necklace. there’s no way a fucking secretary could afford that shit. how many times did she suck him off for him to give it to her?” the blonde snorts to herself - and raises an eyebrow in your direction

the introduction of a third voice makes you perk up

because that voice belongs to yoongi

he stands in front of them with his hands clasped behind his back

“zero times, actually. i suggest keeping your assumptions - which are all wrong, by the way - to yourselves.” yoongi smiles and tilts his head and the two of them go pale and exchange glances before looking down at the ground

it’s almost eery how calm and composed he is when he goes “miss cho, miss pak -  i can destroy your pathetic little cupcake company with one phone call. have a good night, ladies.”

he walks over to you and you’re like >:-) when you see the security guards guiding the two girls out

“thanks for doing that”

“i don’t know what you’re talking about” yoongi downs the rest of his drink and sets it down on the table before taking your champagne and putting it down as well

“you didn’t have to be so mean about it, though”

“i still don’t know what you’re talking about.” he pauses “and yes, i did have to be mean about it. i never really enjoyed these gatherings, anyway. let’s get some ice cream.”

“don’t you still have business to tend to?” you gesture back to the table of men

yoongi shrugs “they’ll call me if they need anything”

you nod slowly and look around one last time “i thought you didn’t like sweet things though”

yoongi is very tempted to say even tho he doesn’t like sweet things he certainly likes you but

the cheesiness of it all makes his entire soul criNGE

“i can make an exception”

he google maps if there are any ice cream places near the event and luckily there’s one about a six-minute walk away

and so the two of you begin the mini trek

you should have brought your cardigan with you

you underestimated how breezy it gets late at night

yoongi obviously notices this and proceeds to take his suit jacket off before wrapping it around you

you turn and give yoongi a smile even though he’s looking straight ahead

“don’t look at me like that”

“like what?” you hum and link your arm with his and yoongi freezes for a millisecond at the contact

he grumbles something under his breath and you don’t bother asking him to repeat it

“sorry for forcing you to go to this dumb thing with me”

“it’s okay, i had fun! plus you’re treating me to an ice cream in four minutes time so that makes everything worth it”

a comfortable silence falls between the two of you

and it’s just the sound of your heels clicking against the pavement mixed in with the occasional car driving by

goD his suit jacket smells like him and it’s making you feel all woozy

when you get to the cute ice cream parlour yoongi opens the door for you like a true gentleman would and when you give him a little curtsey in thanks he can’t help but roll his eyes playfully while the tiniest of smiles tugs at the corners of his mouth

you’re adorable

and if it’s even possible you become even more adorable at the sight of the large selection of flavours of ice cream there is

“oH MY god red velvet cake ice cream??” your nose is practically pressed up against the glass and your eyes are big and sparkly

there are only like one or two other people in the parlour at this hour and yoongi’s glad because that gives the two of you at least a lil bit of privacy

he looks around a little and turns his attention back to the ice creams

“CINNAMON BUN FLAVOURED- you shouldn’t have taken me here boss the sun is going to come up before i make a decision” you shake your head and tsk and yoongi laughs at that “what flavour are you thinking of getting?”

“i was just going to get the low-fat low sugar vanilla frozen yogurt.”

“oh bOO c’mon live a little grandpa” you snort and shuffle a little to scan over the other flavours

“it’s not my fault-“ yoongi pauses and squints his eyes “-apple pie ice cream sounds like the nastiest thing in the world”

“how about you go and get us some seats and i’ll choose your flavour”

“but-“

“if you don’t like it then i’ll let you get your low-fat low-sugar low-fun stupid vanilla frozen yogurt” you negotiate and yoongi’s like okay finE i guess

he’s about to reach into his wallet but you stop him and you’re like nope it’s mY treat go and find us a booth

of course before he goes and finds the two of you a seat he makes sure to slip the cashier a couple of bills and is like i’m covering for whatever she picks out

yoongi decides to go with a lil booth in the back

just for a little more ~privacy~

and now that he has a moment to himself

oh my god what the fucK is happening to him

he doesn’t do ice cream??

he doesn’t do arm linking??

giving his jacket to someone because they’re cold??? not his thing!!!! he ALWAYS puts himself first!!!!!!

but most importantly

he doesn’t do the whole

romAnce thing

like after the whole fiasco with lisa he was like lol i’m not going to put myself through thaT again and then you came along and RUINED everything by kissing him and making his heart go boom boom because he’s finally realising that you’re just so terribly sweet and nice and kind to him even tho he’s a grade A asshole most of the time

he literally can’t get you off his mind

he thinks of you before he goes to bed ( ;-) )

he thinks of you when he wakes up

and then he sees you most hours of the day and you’re always there with a bright smile and you’re like good morning boss! and he wants to EXPLODE because gosh darn it!!!! you are so cute!!!!!!

and now he’s having a crisis because right now in this stupid ice cream parlour at 1 in the morning he is realising that he 110% has feelings for you and wants to kiss the heck out of you

“i told you it was mY treat!!!!” yoongi snaps himself out of it when you slide into the booth to sit next to him and usually yoongi would be like um,,,,, why are you sitting next to me it makes sense for u to sit across from me u idiot

he’ll.,,,,,… he can make an exception for u

ahem

you slide his cup over to him and yoongi blinks down at it

this…. multicoloured monstrosity with tiny baby marshmallows and sprinkles and chocolate syrup on top

“what flavour is this?? diabetes??” yoongi frowns and twists the cup around a couple times to look at it from all angles

“haha, very funny” you stick a spoonful of your ice cream into your mouth (u went with blueberry cheesecake flavoured ice cream) “it’s birthday cake flavoured! it’s wild but it’s not toO wild”

“you call this not too wild??” yoongi takes a small scoop “i can tell u right now i’m not going to like this because birthday cake is a cake it doesn’t belong in an ice cream” he puts it into his mouth

and you watch him as he processes the many flavours swirling around in his mouth

o shit

dis shit is gud

“well?”

“…eh” he shrugs “it’s passable”

you reach out to take his cup “i can always eat it for you and get you your froyo if you “ yoongi slaps your hand away from his cup and glares at you

and in your head you’re like lolz i toLd you so

“you wanna try some of mine?” you offer him a spoonful and yoongi takes it almost immediately

“i like mine better” he shrugs and holds a spoonful up for you “try some.”

as you’re leaning in to take the spoon into your mouth yoongi’s pulling the spoon farther and farther away from you and he feels his heart go boom boom again when you pout and go yOOooOngi pls

you hum when he finally feeds you the spoonful and you don’t even realise your hand is on his thigh and you’re practically pressed up against him

there’s a moment of silence where the two of you kind of just stare at each other

you’re about to pull away when suddenly

a cartoon exclamation mark appears at the top of your head when yoongi leans in and presses his lips against yours

you want to whine when he pulls away like a second later but you compose yourself quickly

“you had some ice cream there” yoongi clears his throat and focuses his attention back on his ice cream

you’re tempted to smother ice cream all over your face if it means yoongi will kiss you again

yoongi’s eyes widen in surprise when you lean in and plant a kiss on his cheek

“you’re cute, you know that?” you murmur and yoongi grumbles that he’S not cute but his cheeks heat up anyway

the point is

you two are now realising

that you like each other

: )))

[screams into the void]

the car ride home is spent letting the radio fill the silence

your tummies are filled with ice cream

both your hearts feel warm and fuzzy (although that’s probably from the insane amount of sugar you guys consumed earlier)

yoongi parks in front of your driveway and is like c’mon i’ll walk u over

you kind of want to invite him in?? to talk about things?? like if he kissed u that must mean he likes you back but what if he’s only doing it because he still hung up over lisa and blah bLah

but for some reason u can’t find the courage because what if it’s true,,, that he’s only using you to get over lisa…. and you’re really enjoying this little bubble that the both of you are floating in right now…..

“i, uh, i’m just going to come out and say it” the two of you are standing by the entrance

you nod slowly and wait for him to continue

oh god

here it comes

he’s going to tell u he’s not looking for anything serious and then you’re going to have to deal with your romantic feelings for him for the rest of your life

“i had a lot of fun tonight, and i… i think i like you.”

you don’t even realise you’re holding your breath but all you can say is

“you like me or you like-like me????”

okay he’s going to ignore that question

yoongi literally feels like he’s in high school again he’s far too mature for this shit

“i liked you the day we met in the elevator and you unknowingly told me how much of an asshole i am, i liked you when you whined about getting my shitty sandwiches for me, i liked you when you made fun of me for not knowing how to tie my own tie the point is i like you and i like-like you. don’t… don’t make a big deal out of this i don’t have a lot of experience with confessions like this but i just need to know if you like me back or not”

yoongi feels his body beginning to cave in on itself when you stare at him like :0

he can’t even look you straight in the eye he’s just staring at the space behind you

“this is the part where you kiss me, yoongi”

he looks at you and he swallows thickly when you take a small step forward

usually he’s the one in power but right now you definitely hold the power over him

and then it happens

he leans down in one swift movement and presses his lips against yours

this is your third kiss with yoongi and it’s your seCOnd one with him toNIGHT

at first it’s a relatively innocent kiss

nice and slow

romantic

makes your heart flutter

but of course

the two of you know exactly where this is going

you feel your tummy doing summersaults when he grabs your hips and pulls you in closer

you wrap your arms around his neck loosely and grin when you feel his tongue prodding at your bottom lip and yoongi groans in his throat when you tangle your fingers in his hair and give him a little tug

“you wanna come in for some coffee or something?” you smooth down his collar and he presses a kiss to your mouth smartly

“…one cream one sugar?” you giggle and pull him in and the two of you stumble to the elevator

yoongi’s hands are aLL over you the moment you unlock your front door

your purse and your keys end up on the floor somewhere because you’re too preoccupied making out with yoongi while he presses you up against the wall

“i’ve wanted to rip this dress off of you the moment i saw you in it” your back arches so that he can unzip the back of your dress while he’s planting kisses to your neck and your shoulders

he lets out a throaty groan when he sees the lingerie you’ve got on underneath

you felt like tonight was an appropriate night to go full bougie so you treated yourself to some ~lingerie~

thank god you did

you gasp when you feel yoongi tug at your panties and you hear a couple threads snap so you slap his hand away

“yoongi!!! this wasn’t cheap!”

“i’ll buy you a new pair, fuck, i’ll buy you ten new pairs” yoongi groans against your neck and pushes his crotch into yours and you automatically forgive him

meanwhile you’re blindly unbuttoning his shirt

articles of clothing are tossed on the floor leading a trail to your bedroom

“you gonna be a good girl for me?” the bed bounces underneath your weight as yoongi gently pushes you onto the mattress

and goD he looks like sin standing above you and loosening his tie while looking down at you with dark eyes and swollen lips

“yes, daddy”

oh,,,,,,,, o oh my god

he wants to wreck you

“naughty little thing” he purrs then leans down to kiss you while slotting himself in between your legs

and the moan you let out when he rolls his hips against yours is something he’d want to listen to for the rest of his life it was possible

and then he’s leaving a trail of wet kisses down your neck and your chest and your stomach until his head is in between your legs

the coffee can definitely wait

; )

when he wakes up the next morning he’s surprised to see your chin propped up on his chest and you have the brightest smile on your face

“you like-like me”

yoongi groans and smacks you with a pillow to shut you up but he can still hear your muffled you like likE Me biTCH

the two of you get to work an hour late because yoongi decided he wanted to strip you out of your pencil skirt the second you changed into it

and everyone’s kind of like ?? what…… the..,.,.,.,fuuuuuu when the elevator doors open and they all catch a glimpse of you adjusting yoongi’s tie and yoongi leaning down to give you a kiss

you’re not sure if yoongi wants the entire office knowing about the two of you so you move to the side to let him walk out first but he grabs you and wraps an arm around your waist and walks the two of you out

and you’re like okay i guess this is a thing now

“good… morning, boss….”

“morning, sir…!”

yoongi pauses and turns back

“good morning, everyone. i hope you’ll all work hard today.”

and then he pushes you gently and the two of you continue walking down the hallway together

oh shit

yoongi just

yoongi just said good morning back

and now everyone’s even more confused because literally whose mans is this

you push his hand back up to your hip when you feel it sliding down a little and you retaliate by pinching his bicep

yoongi smiles and pinches your hip

you turn and look over your shoulder and it looks like the entire office is staring at the two of you like they’re just crowded around the beginning of the hallway

and jimin’s in the front like THAT’S. MY. BEST. FRIEND. Y’ALL. and he blows a silent air kiss to you and you blow one right back

wow

you love life

min yoongi and y/n y/l/n

b i g  d i c k  e n e r g y

yoongi joins you on one of your morning coffee runs because you spent the night at his place so he was like i might as well get coffee with u instead of u walking over here twenty minutes after we get to work

and ah

thIS is jungkook

hm

handsome guy

he can see the appeal

“morning, kook” jungkook perks up when he sees you

you turned jungkook down one morning when he plucked up the courage to ask you if you wanted to grab dinner and see a movie sometime

he was heartbroken for like one minute but when you said goodbye and gave him a tiny kiss on the cheek and told him if yoongi was out of the picture u definitely would’ve ended up with him and he was like :-)))))

the two of you are good friends and he gives you discounts sometimes

“morning, y/n! i’m guessing you’re here for the usua……l…..” and then his eyes very slowly,,, trail over to yoongi who’s standing next to you

he can feel his fiery gaze through his sunglasses

“yep!”

“throw in a cake pop. kook.” yoongi coughs and gestures to the cake pops in the display case

jungkook almost shits himself at how intimidating yoongi is

“y-yessir. right on it… sir.”

after you pay for everything and go over to wait you turn to yoongi and you’re like stop staring at jungkook you’re scaring him

and yoongi’s just like >:-) on the inside because he loves scaring people

when jungkook hands the coffee over to you his grip around the cups are so tight you’re surprised the lids haven’t popped off them

“thanks kookie” you take the paper bag from him and shove your elbow into yoongi’s side because jungkook isn’t staring at you he’s basically staring at the counter

“yeah. thanks, kookie.” yoongi offers a smirk and jungkook’s just in a state of [E N DM YS U F F E R I N G]

you give jungkook an extra large tip to make up for yoongi’s presence

even though you and yoongi are officially together that doesn’t mean you can slack off during work

and you learn this the hard way

sometimes you and jimin are too lazy to text each other so you end up calling him

he moved to a bigger cubicle thanks to you and it’s in a more ~secluded~ area because you know he works best in privacy

“oh my god jimin the other night he fucked me so hard he nearly broke my bed like i woke up this morning and i found a crack in the headboard but honestly i don’t even care because he made me cum like three times and i am so sorry but mr min’s schedule is booked up for the next week i’m afraid i can’t slot you in until next month! yes, goodbye!” you clear your throat and hang up and look up at yoongi who is currently looking down at you with a very amused smile on his face

“…hi boss” your voice cracks and you clear your throat quickly

“miss y/l/n. who was that?”

“oh,,, just some… guy… calling about a meeting… did you…. need anything?”

yoongi shrugs and shakes his head “i’ll be in my office”

but of course

because he’s yoongi

he can’t help himself and he stops before going into his office

“i made you cum four times. if you’re going to gossip at least get the details right. tell jimin to get back to work. and i’m still waiting for the revised copy of the contract that you said you’d type up an hour ago.”

maybe u and jimin should go back to texting

“i have parts of it revised but i-“

“got distracted?” yoongi’s eyes flicker towards the phone “don’t let it happen again.”

“buT jimin was the one who-“

“don’t blame other people for your own crippling procrastination.” your cheeks burn up and you let out a huff because yoongi’s turned into an asshole boss again

“pizza at my place tonight? we’ll leave at 5.” yoongi swoops down and steals a kiss from you and you’re like hoW do you go from asshole boss yoongi to boyfriend yoongi so quickly “you’re sleeping over again, by the way.”

you cup his cheeks and keep him awkwardly bent over so you can give him another soft kiss and he hums

“you owe me a new headboard, mister” you boop his nose and he swats your hands away before standing up and adjusting his tie “the main reason why i’m sleeping over is because i’m scared that if i lie down on my bed it’ll snap in half”

“you know, you could always just move into my place, baby. i want the contract in the next ten minutes or you’re working overtime.” yoongi leaves you with that comment and goD HE’S SUCH A..,.,.,., he’S SUCH a yOONGI

even before you and yoongi got together he always stressed the importance of not disrupting any of his meetings

there are a couple exceptions like that time he told you ‘you hAve to tell me when mr kim calls’ and when you did you got in trouble for it (he apologised about that and admitted - he only did it because he liked watching you get all riled up)

yoongi cut your lunch break short because he wanted you to re organize your desk (which was something that you were going to get to aFter lunch) so yA you were feeling a little salty because you were really enjoying your noodles

and yoongi’s in the middle of a meeting right now but you just came up with another exception

:-)

yoongi’s leaning back against his chair and keeping his eyes trained on the gentlemen currently talking about the stock market and recent increases and decreases

thank god he has resting bitch face all the time otherwise it’d be obvious that yoongi was boRed out of his fuckign mind

his phone buzzes on the table and the guy falters for a second but continues to speak when yoongi waves his hand

hm

interesting

it’s a text from you that just says : )

but something that’s more interesting

there’s a picture attached to the text

it’s probably just a meme you found off your Facebook feed

he should text you and tell you to get back to work

plus the guy isn’t even paying attention to yoongi he’s too busy explaining his pie charts

so yoongi technically isn’t being thAt rude

he unlocks his phone and opens the message app and

oh god

fuck

definitely not a meme

it’s a picture of u with your top unbuttoned exposing a sexy little bralette that definitely is not appropriate work wear

he didn’t see you put that on this morning whEn did youyou must’ve changed during work no wonder you took longer than usual to come back with his coffee

yoongi swallows thickly and lowers the brightness on his screen but looks back up at the presentation

he’s looking at pie charts but all he can think about is how badly he wants you over his desk

you’re slightly concerned when you see that yoongi’s left your message on read

uhHHhhHH

maybe this was a bad idea

maybe you pushed it too far this time

you were probably going to get in a lot of trouble

you’re chewing on your nails nervously but you’re like noPe i’m not going to overthink it and you set your phone down

it feels like a million years have passed when the meeting finally ends

you peek out from behind your desk when you hear yoongi walking down the hallway

and you feel a twinge of disappointment and humiliation when he walks past you and straight into his office

and then

it happens

“miss y/l/n. i’d like to see you in my office for a second.” and he has thAt look in his eye so you know you’re in a different kind of trouble

>:-)

instead of complying ur like oOf you know what i’m kind of in the middle of something i’m sorting out your-

“that was very clearly an order and not a question” and he disappears into the office and you’re just having the time of your LIFE

yoongi ends up fucking you on his desk with your skirt bunched up to your hips and your shirt completely unbuttoned so he can see this barely there bralette for himself

and you’re pretty sure he has a thing for your heels because he makes you keep them on

he has his hands pressed flat on the desk next to your head while your legs wrap themselves around his waist

“naughty baby, sending me a picture like that in the middle of a meeting…” yoongi growls and pushes your legs down and you let out a mewl at the pure pleasure coursing through your veins “say you’re sorry and i might let you cum”

“i’m- oh, god - i-i’m not sorry, though” even when you’re getting fuCked out of your mind you’re cocky and yoongi wants to fuck that smirk off your face

he delivers a particularly hard thrust that hits you right there and makes your back arch and your eyes roll to the back of your head

“i’m sorry - what was that? didn’t hear you, princess” and then he’s hitting that spot over and over and over and ovEr again and you’re gripping onto the edge of the table so hard you’re worried you’re going to snap a chunk off

“yoOngaaH! i’m s- i’m sorry i’msorryi’msorryplease i’m s so sorry” yoongi lets his head drop and he bites down on your shoulder as you claw down his back over his shirt

“good girl.”

this is like a 200 pound mahogany desk but he’s fucking you with such fervour that it begins to tremble underneath the two of you

after your mind blowing orgasm the last thing you expect is for him to turn you around and bend you over so your chest is pressed against the desk

yoongi bends down over you and you shiver when you feel his mouth against your ear

“you’re not getting away that easily” you whimper and the next thing you know yoongi is shoving his tie into your mouth to shut you up because he knoWs how loud you get when you’re overstimulated

he doesn’t bother teasing and pushes himself all the way in and lets his head drop to your back and just lets out this gutteral grOan

when you leave his office you’re all flushed and your shirt is wrinkled and buttoned wrong but yoongi isn’t any better

his hair is a mess and his shirt is mostly unbuttoned revealing the milky expanse of his chest that’s littered with splotches of your lipstick

he wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you in to plant a kiss on your cheek and then pats your bum and tells you to get back to work

one time you were going down on him and you freeze when you hear someone knock on the door so he makes you hide under his desk

it's jimin and he's like u..uh hey boss have u seen y/n?? i have to ask her to file this document for me but i haven't seen her anywhere

yoongi jolts when he feels you take him into your mouth again and he tangles his fingers in your hair when you start bobbing your head slowly

“sorry jimin, haven't seen her. come back in like... 20 minutes."

and jimin’s like okay yes sir and he shuts the door

after it’s all over jimin sEES YOU leaving yoongi’s office and he’s like oh y/n i was just looking for-

wait

but

but yoongi said he didn’t see you and

you were in his office and

your lipstick is smudg,,,,ed,,,,….., your hair.,,.,.., is kind of tousled,,, more tousled than usual…..

you and jimin are kind of having a stare off and you’re waiting for it to happen

and five seconds later it hits him

when he opens his mouth you slap a hand over it and you’re like i’ll buY YOUR LUNCH FOR THE NEXT WEEK just don’T SAY ANYTHING

jimin’s like no i don’t give a shit about you going down on him at work what i’M freaked out about is the fact that he seemed so calm and composed while you were sucking him off

min yoongi is a man of many talents and one of them is being able to hold a poker face for eternity

you unfortunately are not as talented at keeping it cool as your boyfriend

which is something he both loves and hates about you

tonight yoongi’s working late again which means that you have to stay late too

you don’t hAve to but,,,, you like to keep yoongi company and also being completely alone while he’s working forces you to actually do your damn job

“who are you calling?” yoongi steps out of his office and tugs his tie loose before rolling up his sleeves

“mr jung’s secretary- if he’s ever going to pick up the damn phone. i’m trying to reschedule your meeting with mr jung because it overlaps with your meeting with mr kim this coming thursday.” you don’t even look at yoongi when you speak and scribble something down on a post it note before sticking it on your wall calendar

“which mr kim?”

“the…” you pause to think “the one with the hair” you gesture to the top of your head

“…they both have hair”

“i know i know i’m saying this one is the one with the blonde- hi! hi, i’m miss y/l/n, secretary of mr min yoongi. i’m so sorry for calling so late into the night but i just needed to…”

he loves watching you work so hard

his little busy bee

yoongi grabs the arm of your chair and swivels you around so you’re facing him and you give him a look that says what do u want i’m busy

your eyes almost pop out of their sockets when yoongi drops to his knees and settles in between your legs

“of course, i can wait for a minute-“ the second the secretary puts you on hold you put a hand over the receiver (just in case he can still hear you) “yoongi, no!!”

“yoongi, yes.” your body automatically listens to him as he taps the side of your thigh for you to sit up a little so he can push your skirt up

“i’m on the phone, yoongi. you can’t do this right now just give me like three minutes” you hiss but your legs naturally spread for him and he just smirks up at you and is like mmmmm your body is telling me otherwise

you reach over and push the speaker button and then hang up the phone and thank god the secretary still has you on hold because you are using a range of very colourful words to scold your boyfriend

“i’ve called mr jung’s office before- his secretary puts you on hold for like ten minutes you’ll be fine” you don’t know how he does it but the next thing you know your panties are gone and your boss/boyfriend’s head is buried in between your legs

“oh goD yoongi please don’t stop” you whimper

his fingers dig into the meat of your thigh so he can keep your legs spread because you keep twiTCHINg

“hello?” you want to scream when the holding music turns off and the secretary comes back on

“yoongi stoP you have to stop” you gasp and arch your back against the chair and yoongi’s hand snakes up to push against your tummy

“pick up the phone and do your job” yoongi presses a kiss on your inner thigh before giving you a small nip and you thank the lords above he’s going to let you take this call first

yoongi leans back a little and fixes his hair

“hi, yes, hello” you’re a little breathless as you unmute yourself and you clear the throat

“i’m having a little trouble with the scheduling here. mr jung can only do thursday next week, otherwise i’ll have to pencil you in for next month.”

“he can’t do friday or anything?”

you give yoongi a warning look when he begins pressing a trail of warm kisses from the inside of your knee to your inner thigh

“i don’t think so.”

“when does his- oH” you nearly bite your tongue off when yoongi suddenly attaches his mouth to your clit and your fingers immediately tangle themselves in his hair

“sorry, what was that? didn’t catch you.”

“his- whendoeshislastmeetingonthursdayend??”

“uh.. hold on, let me check here…”

you bite down on the inside of your cheek and your head flops back against your chair as you focus on the ceiling and try your hardest not to moan

yoongi can’t help but smirk when the smallest of whimpers slips past your lips

it’s when hE lets out a low moan against you that you gasp loudly and your toes curl in your heels

“his last meeting ends at 6:30 that day how about mr min?”

“five forty fiVE” yoongi throws one of your legs over his shoulder and oh my goD you want to die this feels amazing and you can’t make any sounds and your body is currently telling you that hEY i’M ABOUT TO HAVE AN ORGASM

so that puts you in a panic because there’s no way you’re going to cum and have a normal conversation with a stranger so “you know what give me five minutes to reorganise mr min’s schedule and i’ll call you right back”

you hang up the call and the next thing you know you’re seeing stars and yoongi’s name keeps slipping past your lips in the form of whimpers and moans and yoongi is just soaking it aLL up

“that was a close call, no?” yoongi looks up at you from in between your legs and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand

“i hate you.”

[cosmicmoved]

IT’S TIME FOR MIN’S OFFICIAL INTRO... a mintro, if you will. KIM MINWOO, KNOWN AS MIN; 24 YEAR OLD POPSTAR, MEMBER OF POP DUO SO:DA. this is a muse i made back in march for a closed rpg that didn’t open so i wanted to give him a second chance! (:< i’ll write a proper bio for him soon, one that makes him sound like less of a moron, but this is just a basic rundown of his basic situation & some extra facts about him! sorry if this sucks, i can’t introduce a new muse without getting nervous for the life of me asdfghgfdfg anyway !! this gets pretty lengthy, even though it’s all just bullet points, so i threw it under a cut to save the dash. please click the read more to learn about min! if you have any trouble reading the theme, please refer to the mobile version of this post!

FIRST!! I want to be clear that Min is not a K-Pop idol, he’s a popstar. Technically, he started off in the K-Pop industry, is still ‘owned’ by a Korean company and was trained under that system but to describe him that way is no longer accurate. (i’m also very aware there’s already a k-pop idol called min but as he’s fictional, a man and, again, not a k-pop idol, it doesn’t really matter that much but m!ss a deserved better anyway)

BASICS

min is tomo’s best friend. tomo, having a lifetime of awful hollywood experience on min, was one of the first friends he made after moving to LA and they were both around the same age. they’re a chaotic combo and i love them... (i know the fc choice seems a bit too easy but i actually made both of these characters totally separately & making tomo made me want to give min another shot so i decided to lump them together)

full name is kim minwoo (김민우 / 金玟雨 / kim min-u) but he goes by MIN, both as a stage name and a nickname. call him either min or minwoo, he doesn’t really care either way. (he’s fed up with people pronouncing the W...it’s silent...)

birthday: 12th June 1995. he’s 24 years old.

nobody can tell whether or not he’s a jerk because he’s essentially a nice person. is it false bravado or does he just lack tact? is he just a part-time bastard? like.....he’s not mean, he’s a good person, he cares about other people!! ...but he’s also kind of a brat & he’s VERY stroppy. he gets upset if stuff doesn’t work out the way he wants it to.

he’s a member of the pop duo, SO:DA; an okay singer, more of a rapper, but a solid dancer. also very much known for his look, something about which he’s more bitter than he lets on. (he pretends to eat it up but he actually finds it pretty frustrating, a direct contrast to tomo who loves being the designated Pretty Boy so long as it’s not in clean, shiny way; if ur gonna call min pretty a bunch of times, compliment him somewhere else too at least once if u don’t want to end up on his list of enemies)

SO:DA debuted in south korea back in 2014 but the company made the decision to move it abroad a year later in an attempt to globalise their output. it’s hard to consider them as a k-pop group as they’ve been based in LA for 4 years now and they release music entirely in english. (pls don’t mention super m to me, i made this character in MARCH asdfghgfdfh)

the group’s name was originally short for SOL & DAL, taken from the french word for sun (soleil) and the korean word for moon, but they dropped it after the move abroad. min was the member who represented the moon while his partner in the group was the sun. they’ve sort of kept the concept in terms of visuals and all the rest but they mostly don’t speak about it.

min actually grew up in the UK. born in seoul, moved to a london when he was four and then moved back to seoul when he was thirteen and then to LA when he was eighteen.

EXTRA TRIVIA

min’s not as into partying as tomo so like...he’ll go along with it and go to clubs with tomo but usually doesn’t drink as much & often ends up in charge of dealing with the aftermath of tomo being an idiot. min doesn’t really mind bc he’s used to people trying to chase after him & being treated like an irresponsible child so he likes being the responsible one for once. (actually, he’s just a much tamer character than tomo in general. i think the same heavier topics will come up by virtue of him being a big part of tomo’s plotline but, in isolation, min’s less intense. min doesn’t take any drugs, for one thing; it’s part lack of interest, part he’d never get away with it like tomo does)

min isn’t allowed to do wild shit in public or else his management will come down on him like a tonne of bricks but he likes the idea of the Bad Boy image so he kinda...mooches off of tomo for the street cred. like they’re genuinely best friends and he’s not using tomo or anything shitty like that but i can’t say that min doesn’t enjoy being seen as trouble by proxy.

got banned from club penguin when he was ten for saying fuck. (more than once bc saying it once only gets you banned for 24hrs.) it was his first experience with resenting authority for enforcing their rules on him 😔

he likes to keep this sort of...mysterious, tortured image but his upbringing was actually fairly ordinary. he gets on with his family and loves them a lot. nobody’s dead, there’s no awkward relationships.

he has two siamese cats, both aged about 3 years. they have their own instagram account that’s about 40% run by min and 60% run by his manager when they have nothing better to do (usually after min has spammed them with pictures he’s taken). in conclusion, they are baby.

this has actually resulted in them having to separate their channels of contact by purpose; one messaging service will be used for important stuff, one will be used for casual stuff, one will be used exclusively for social media (cat pics & selfies), so on and so forth.

his management won’t let him get tattoos and he’s mad about it. like to the point that he’s been known to wear fake tattoos occasionally. do NOT clown him for it. he won’t take it.

actually, min’s management is just very controlling and overbearing & he’s totally overworked but hahaha we’re just going to ignore that bc arguing with the people in charge means risking your dream career in music & potentially losing it all, esp bc you skipped out on uni and fucked up a lot of high school just to pursue this job hahaha let’s just internalise that shit and get on with it

owns the cherry coke aesthetic. actually thinks classic coke is better. shhh, don’t tell. his favourite sweet is basset’s cherry drops though hehehe (not that he gets to eat them very often, given i can’t imagine they’re easy to find outside of the uk)

actually drinks too much coca cola. that probably explains the stroppiness, as well as his awful sleeping patterns.

pepsi can get fucked

min claims to be a vegetarian.

min is not a vegetarian.

the backstory there is pretty simple; min’s fussy. he has particular tastes. most kinds of meat, esp red meat, do not fall into his OK Zone. instead of having to suffer through important, fancy meeting dinners with posh steaks and not being allowed to use his fussiness as an excuse, he started claiming he was a vegetarian. people seemed to be more accepting of that. the only trouble is that he’s now widely known as a vegetarian when he doesn’t actually give a shit. the only people who know he’s bullshitting are his friends. he just wants a mcdonald’s double cheeseburger.

min lives on a diet of utter shit. he’s contractually obliged to eat healthily when preparing for promotions so he doesn’t just fuckin collapse on stage from malnutrition. pls eat a vegetable.

o yea he’s petty as fuck. wrong him like...once...and it’s fuck u city.

also he currently has silver hair. he’s icy...u see that he’s icy......i know the graphic is pink hair but i made it as a sidebar for smth like a year ago and i wanted to reuse it (:<

ALSO !! uhhhhhh, if anybody’s interested in rping the other half of SO:DA.........pls let me know asdfgfdf i’d literally LOVE for someone to take that role hehehe! p much everything is up to you besides a few requirements; he has to be close enough in age to min, probs not too different in build (duos always kind of have?? a sorta physical symmetry??) and he's a vocalist. the personality is totally your call but there has to be that sunny image. fc and everything else is your choice too but i’d have to be chill w/it & agree that it works asdfghdd!!

[cow1sequester]

EPISODE 3 - “Truly and honestly everyone’s strategies this round is making no sense” - Owen

TWIST: Moral Dilemma (Fewest Votes)

ELIMINATED: Adam (Battle Match) // Austin (Battle Match) // Christian (Wheel of Misfortune)

JARED

I love Raul, if he won I would be happy

OWEN

Okay I’m sorry it’s been a hot minute but here are my thoughts on the first two rounds of the game: First of all WHAOOOOOOOH this cast is STACKED!!! I was pleasantly surprised to see Will and Autumn again. Love my boy Jared. Love Juls, Isaac, Ryan, IAN!!!! Beck and Blake legends.... But then there are also quite a few I’ve never played with before that seemed cool hehe so I’m hype! This first round I focused a lot on connections and Jared and I got together and dreamed up a bomb ass alliance of me, him, Jarod, Autumn, Juls and Isaac. Genuinely love talking to and playing with all five of them so I am hopeful that we all go far. But I did spend some time with other connections as well. I LOVE Christian, he told me he wasn’t the best at typing so I added him on WhatsApp and he sends me voice memos all the time hahaha if my alliance is the brigade then he is the Britney to my Lane <3 love him. Raul is awesome as well. Nash legend. Ian and Will I knew before but haven’t played with in FOREVER which has been fun to catch up with. Will was first in the chain reaction thing and was thinking of giving to Ian and I was like Ian is gonna hold a grudge if u do that why not pick Nik instead !!!! Lmao. It all worked out cause I was safe and the alliance got their way <3 I haven’t really looked for LOS at all I guess I’m waiting for more clues :( I would love to have one but it seems like endless possibilities rn. ////// split here Round two is where shit got interesting because we got split into two groups and suddenly everyone I’m working with was in my house..... 5/9 of us were part of the alliance which was great, but then the other four were Christian my love, Ian and Will my other loves, and Austin.... so right away I tried pushing Austin’s name and even saying I didn’t care if he tries battling me but nobody else on my team had talked to Will at all. Which I was in hindsight fine with doing will bc he hadn’t been around and he wouldn’t choose to battle me :) So I told Christian he needed to be super social and that he should talk to the Jarod’s and maybe to Will so that Will didn’t pick him lmao Then TWENTY MIN BEFORE VOTE WILL  DECIDED TO BE AN ABSOLUTE WHACKASS NUT AND TRY TO CARE ABOUT THE GAME AND FLIP !!!! So I acted like I was gonna help him flip it but as a contingency plan in case we couldn’t and it was him I told him that Austin was easy to beat in challenges xo The whole thing worked, will picked Austin and said he was told to but honestly if Austin comes back and knows I threw his name to will then whatever idc. I protected everyone this week and it feels good <3 except for will but at the end of the day when I’m aligned with 7/8 other people, one of them is going to have to go into battle, and I’m glad it was him just bc he hadn’t been around :(

RAUL

Let's read some bitches: Akeylah - This girl is SKETCH.com I told her I was voting Nathan, she left me on read and like 15 minutes later Nathan came crying in my DMs for what happened in round 2. I didn't have great expectations about her, so I have my eyes on her. Autumn- She's a fuckin CAPRICORN. Sis werk. She was willing to vote Nathan  so that tells me she's willing to work with me some time. Beck- Boyfriend 2.0 His voice... TEA. But then he demonstrated that he doesn't have my back as I would have had his when I told him about what Nathan's plan was. He seems like someone who I'm gonna have to cut on the long run. You can be all cute you want but I'll cut a bitch. Also he's a Scorpio... NEVER trust a Scorpio. Blake - I've working hard for him and I to work. I wish he was a bit older so I could flirt a bit, but him being 18 seems kinda weird. We had a "F2" deal day 1 cause of his introduction video but ain't nobody taking that serious. Christian - A Taurus. He seemed sketch, I def need to talk to him more, but he could be my Tommy and carry him until I can't no more. Speaking Spanish is def a bond he won't have with anyone else. Ian - There's something about him that I want to trust but something tells me he's SKETCH. He's someone I need to read better. Isaac - I do not enjoy him, his humor is like NOT funny and people laugh at what he says? I don't get it. I'd be over the moon to sent his ass home but he seems like someone with some power with some people so it needs to be something done carefully. Jared - Now this is MY baby. I literally love him already. Aquarius king. He's a sadboi, musician, like bitch is really tryna make me fall or something. For some weird reason I trust him too much so I should be careful but for some reason I feel like he should fuck me up. Jarod - Now this is SURPRISE, I've really enjoyed talking to this Aquarius. Are Aquarius my new Sags? For some reason I really enjoy him, also he has all the cast eating his palm so I'm not even gonna try to take him out, unless someone is like "we have the numbers, let's take this bitch out", cause I might trust him but I ain't dumb. Juls - Is she inactive? Nobody has ever mentioned her name for the bad or the good. She made me vulnerable Round 1 and since she hasn't talked to me, she knows what's up I guess cause I'm not forgetting sweetie. Nathan - The snake of the season. I even forgot his horoscope, maybe Leo? He's not dumb, we're probably gonna gun for each other at some point. Fake bitch. Owen - Boyfriend 3.0 This is the flirt that goes the most both ways. I enjoy him, also I think he was a lot of power so bitch I want a ride to jury at least. Also another Capricorn so I have to like him. Patrick - He seems kinda dumb and not a good strategic player but good at challenges, this bitch needs to be gone before he gets more chances at battle thingys. Ryan - He's not the best player obviously so his a great ally, I had Adam therefore I had him but now I have to work for him to like me and want to take me somewhat far also. Will - This bitch is LOST lmao. He's picture screams 4.0 GPA the bitch is scary. I wouldn't mind having him as an ally in a BB but here being a comp beast doesn't seem to work in my favour at all.

JARED

JARED

JARED

going to call with juls tonight, i'm considering letting her know i have the los if i feel confident enough that she won't tell anyone then i might try and call with beck afterwards but I'm not sure yet ideally i can maneuver through the game without much trouble and then use the los in an effective way, while keeping bigger targets around me, that is why this alliance is so good for me

OWEN

Truly and honestly Everyone’s strategy for this round is making no sense to me. I don’t get why people would self vote. You’re literally guaranteeing yourself to have at least 1 vote instead of 0?????? I can see self voting if you KNEW for a fact someone else was voting for you and giving you two. But if a bunch of people self vote....??? Let’s say 11 people self vote and 5 vote for one of those 11. That still means six of those 11 who self voted have the lowest. I really don’t understand why jared thinks that’s a smart idea but whatever. I think my alliance of six should split our votes on six of those ten people. That way it makes a bigger chances some of us get 0 votes because I doubt all ten of those are gonna throw a vote on some of us especially with all this self vote talk. I really really don’t get why that isn’t clear to everyone but whatever. I don’t wanna be too pushy but literally no one but jared is contributing to strategy and I don’t like his plan lmao. If he wants to self vote he can go ahead but I genuinely hope no one else votes for him And he gets himself sent in to the revote lmao

ADAM’S EXIT INTERVIEW

CHRISTIAN’S EXIT INTERVIEW

[jungshookz]

ceo!yoongi - the fishnet stockings

→ pairing: min yoongi x reader

→ genre: ceo!au, jealouS yoongi, this is mainly smut so,,,, nSFW, jimin is a victim of your guys’ sinning yet again

→ wordcount: 4.3k

→ notes: usually i’m not great at writing smut,,, but hopefully this was good enough for you guys i hope i was able to QUENCH your thirst because as much as we like soft fluffy ceo!yoongi sometimes we need to fulfil our thirsty desires and this particular one involves fishnet stockings ALSO the original ceo!yoongi fic is almost at 1k which is kind of sort of crazy??? u guys are too nice to me 

if you have no idea whO ceo!yoongi is go ahead and read the fic that started it allllllllll anyways i hope you guys like this one! feel free to flood the friCK out of my inbox i love dat shit

if u wanna ask yoongs or y/n anything u know what to do ;-)

(gif isn’t mine!)

(((and the read more function iS there but most of the time it doesn’t work on mobile :// i am sorry don’t attack me by sending passive-aggressive anon messages)))

you’re pretty sure your dryer is broken or something

why?

your clothes are shRINKing and there’s no other explanation than the dryer!!!!

some of your sweaters and shirts and sweatpants have survived and they come out the same size you bought them in

but things like your work blouse

your pencil skirt is teN times tighter than you feel it should be

like yeah you can still wiggle into it and zip it up and stuff but- holy shIt your ass has never looked better

u lookin t h i c c

“woah” you mutter and check yourself out in the mirror

the pencil skirt has never done thIS to your body before

it moulds perfectly around you and outlines the shape of your hips and bum and thighs and everything

usually it reaches a little above your knee but it’s got to be like a couple inches shorter now

like it’s basically mid-thigh

you don’t have anything else to wear so this is going to have to do

you’ll be fine ,, right ??

you reach for the pantyhose and you’re about to pull them on and then you notice the huge fuCKing HOLE on the side

how??

where??? when????? (hint: yoongi might have something to do with your shredded pantyhose)

you groan and toss it aside before staring at yourself in the mirror

now what are you supposed to do

you can’t show up to work without pantyhose because of the dumb coMpanY uNifoRm poLiCy

you need to ask namjoon to modify the policy because you hate wearing pantyhose anyway

and what kind of word is pantyhose

the ugliest word in the world that’s what kind of word it is 

so here you are

you have to leave in 6 minutes otherwise you’ll be late and yoongi will slaughter u and have your head on a stick

even tho the two of you are dating he hasn’t taken it easy on you  

“yEs yes yes” you whisper to yourself like a maniac when you pull out a pair of stockings

well

okay

they’re not regular stockings,,,, these r fishnet stockings

you only ever wear these things when you go out to the club with jimin to give ur outfit that special touch (aka you want to attract the attention of the fellas)

basically u haven’t worn these in a while but it’s not like you have a choice you don’t have any other stockings

you wiggle into them and then yank the pencil skirt back down and smooth it out

and now for your blouse

you tuck it into the skirt and leave a couple buttons unbuttoned for that ~casual~ look

and then u have your skinny leather belt and u loop it through the skirt before securing it

yaS girl look at that cinched waist!!!  

and to top it off

a brand new pair of strappy black heels

they’re pretty cute it’s like an open toe heel with a thin leather strap around the ankle

they’re a little higher than you’re used to but once you break them in you’ll be alright

your phone buzzes on the bed

‘meet u in the lobby in 4 minutes! don’t be late u bitch’ you snort at jimin’s text before replying to him quickly and tossing your phone into your purse

and now that you get a chance to look at your whole outfit

….is this work appropriate

this might not be work appropriate

o shit

okay

what do u do now

you can’t wear this to work

well like

it’s not appropriate but at the same time it’s not not appropriate

you’re still wearing a nice white blouse and the skirt is modest even tho it’s mid-thigh

it’s not even mid-thigh it’s like a liTTLe longer than that pft

your phone buzzes again and you already know it’s jimin

you know what it’s fine

you’ll wear this today and right after work you’ll go and buy a new outfit and also you’ll have to look into getting a new damn dryer

jimin’s already parked out front waiting for you unsurprisingly

“morning! lez go” you slam the car door shut and buckle yourself in

“good morni- woAhHhH it’s a goOD moRNING inDEeD” jimin’s eyes widen and he stifles a laugh “wha….. new outfit?”

“is it bad? it’s bad, isn’t it? my damn dryer’s shrinking all my clothes and like-“ you tug at the skirt a little

“no, no! you’re fine, i don’t care about the outfit - i’m looking at the fishnet stockings. why are you wearing your sexy stockings to work?? ur already dating our bOSS”

you let out a breath of relief

at least it’s not the outfit

ya the stockings are definitely eye-catching but what can u do

“your ass looks really good today for some reason”

“i told you the dryer’s shrinking my shit!!” the elevator doors open “i’ll see you at lunch?”

“see ya at lunch”

you blow jimin an air-kiss and he blows one back but not before giving your butt a quick smack

you scowl playfully and smack his hand before rushing to your desk

yoongi’s door is opened ajar which is his sign for u to come in

you knock on the door before letting yourself in

“the coffee’s brewing right now but i figured i’d come in and say good morning first” yoongi’s scrolling through his phone

he’s probably looking through his emails or something

he sets it down before looking up at you with a warm smi- hOLy sHIT

“hi. good morning.” is all yoongi can breathe out because you,.,.,.,., are wearing a very different? work outfit this morning

“morning!!!” you click over to his side of the desk and bend down to give him a lil kiss

“you look very different” yoongi pulls you down so you’re sitting on his lap and you automatically wrap your arms around him

“the dryer’s shrinking my clothes it’s not my fauLt” you murmur

you’re going to be saying that same thing for the whole damn day

yoongi squeezes the side of your bum

“and the fishnet stockings?”

“someone ripped up all my other stockings so once again it’s not my fault” you tease and poke yoongi’s nose

he hums and kisses the crook of your neck

“you don’t have any spare outfits here?”

“no, why? is it really that inappropriate?” you pick at the stockings and yoongi shakes his head quickly

“well,,, it’s a little more scandalous than what you usually wear but i’m just-“ yoongi cuts himself off

he has a meeting today with jung hoseok and you have to be in the room because your job is to take notes and stuff and he reaLLy doesn’t want another guy looking at u when you’re dressed like thiS

don’t get him wrong he loves - loves - this outfit because goddamn you look real good in pencil skirts but like?? he’s selfish and doesn’t like sharing u

your phone buzzes and it’s a reminder telling you that mr jung should be arriving soon for the meeting and you have to go and bring him to the conference room

“i’ll see you in a couple minutes” you give yoongi one last peck before you’re rushing out the room and down the hallway and yoongi’s eyes literally cannot leave the curve of your hips and the swell of your ass in this skirt jesus christ

he needs to like splash some cold water on his face because there’s no way he’s going into a conference with a boner

yoongi manages to calm himself down before the meeting but once he walks into the conference room he gets worked up all over again

except this time it’s for a different reason

he’s worked up because he’s a n G R Y

every single guy in there is staring at you like you’re a piece of meat

“sorry, could you pass me that pen? yeah, the one right there” you nod obediently and lean over the table to grab the pen and yoongi’s like [this] close to snapping that guy’s neck because the two guys sandwiching you have the audacity to lean back and stare at your ass

men are animals

ANIMALS

yoongi is disgusted even tho he was literally ready to shred your clothes off of you and take you over his desk like five minutes ago but look it’s different when he does it because he ogles you out of his LOVE for you and these men are doing it because they’re perverts

yoongi clears his throat and everyone immediately turns to look at him before they’re standing up and bowing respectfully

you bow a little too just because you’re used to it and yoongi gestures for you to come and stand next to him

“yoongi! so nice to see you again.” hoseok sticks his hand out and yoongi shakes it politely

“it’s nice to see you too, hoseok. i’m surprised you actually showed up this time.”

“ah, you know me and my busy schedule. my secretary keeps mixing up my meetings - a bit of a dummy, this one, but i love him!” he nudges his secretary and you have to resist the urge to laugh when you see the poor guy’s cheeks flare up

“it’s okay, it happens to the best of us” you reassure the guy and nudge his side

“so - should we get this show on the road? we’ve got a lot to talk about today.” yoongi takes his seat at the end of the table and you head on over to the back of the room to your little desk

hoseok’s secretary takes a seat next to you

“i’m kihyun, by the way” he leans in and whispers in your ear

you turn and smile before sticking your hand out

“y/n. nice to meet ya”

kihyun highkey cute tho

“how long is this meeting?”

“they’re usually like an hour and a bit long. it takes everything within me to not fall asleep.”

kihyun snorts and adjusts his glasses “tell me about it. last time i was at a meeting with mr jung i was tempted to wear sunglasses just so i could take a snooze”

“oof see now thAt’s smart but like how do you explain wearing sunglasses indoors?”

“…excessive light leaves you prone to migraines?”

“i’m 100% going to use that”

“mr yoo? miss y/l/n? something you’d like to share with everyone?”

you jump when yoongi suddenly calls the two of you out in the middle of the meeting

kihyun immediately avoids yoongi’s gaze and his cheeks flare up

but luckily you’re used to yoongi by now (duh) and ur not scared of ur mans but also you know you gotta keep it respectful

“nope. we’re good!” you nudge kihyun and he looks up at yoongi before smiling sheepishly

the rest of the meeting goes by pretty smoothly

you take a couple important notes here and there

sometimes u go on ur phone to play tetris and then kihyun’s nudging you and telling you to pay attention lol

but like

yoongi looks rlly fucking attractive when he’s leading a meeting and you have no idea how you haven’t noticed that before

the way his lips curl around certain words and the way his tongue flicks out to lick over his bottom lip in between sentences sometimes

even when he pokes his tongue into his cheek when he’s listening to someone else speak

or the way he leans back against his chair and stares at the person speaking with like the most intense stare with his hands clasped on his lap just radiates Big Dick Energy

the way he’s leaning back against his chair makes you wonder if that’s what he’d look with you riding him on his office chair

good god

get ur hormones in chECk omg

and then the little voice in the back of your head gives you the gentlest of suggestions to get your boyfriend’s attention in the middle of this very important meeting

and at first you’re like nOnOno i can’t yoongi is a very Serious businessman and this is a very Serious meeting

but then again

this is prolly the only time ur ever going to come to work dressed like this

so you gotta seize the moment

carpe diem am i right or am i right

you cross your legs instinctively and squeeze your thighs together when you notice yoongi’s eyes flicker over to you

he tilts his head curiously and a smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth when he sees you take your bottom lip in between your teeth and sit up a little straighter

yoongi’s mouth goes dry when he sees you reach up to undo one of the buttons on your blouse and he catches a glimpse of the lacy white bralette you have on underneath when you lean back against your chair

yoongi gives you a warning look before his eyes flicker back to hoseok

hm

there’s not a lot you can do here

it’s not like you can just start stripping in front of everyone

you sigh and look over at kihyun who’s busy scribbling notes down

*ding* lightbulb

“pst. i think i missed a couple points. can i look at your notes?”

“yeah, for su-“ you lean over and practically preSS your boobs up against kihyun’s arm and his eyes immediately go W I D E because wow your cleavage is right there

yoongi pokes his tongue into his cheek and his eyes keep flicking to you and then back to whoever’s speaking

you lock gazes with yoongi for a split second and he narrows his gaze

“oh, that’s a good point that i missed,” you whisper and kihyun nods quickly and is like SW EA TING

you see yoongi clench his jaw and swallow thickly when you reach over to squeeze kihyun’s bicep as a way of saying thank you

>:-)

“well it was really nice meeting you!” you smile and tilt your head and hold your hand out for kihyun to shake

“you too” he grasps your hand in his and gives you a shake and he kinda lingers

“mr. yOO let’s get outta here i’m starving” kihyun turns to see hoseok already standing by the elevators

“duty calls” kihyun bows and offers you a cute smile and u know what if u weren’t with yoongi you would totally go for kihyun “see ya around!”

“you toOoOhello” before you get a chance to say bye to kihyun yoongi’s grabbed your wrist and is dragging you back to his office

you can see the anger radiating off of him in waves and dare u say,..,,.., u are kind of turned on but like also you’re having so much fun right now lmao

he slams the door as soon as the two of you get into the office and you jump in surprise

“so, you wanna go over the notes i took from the meeting?” you try your hardest to act like you weren’t just seducing yoongi in front of a bunch of men but you’re already breaking into giggles

yoongi grabs your notebook and tosses it aside before grabbing you and pinning you up against the door

“you think this is funny?” he smirks and cradles your jaw and tilts your head before leaning down and planting kisses on the side of your neck

“i think this is very funny” you hum

“blatantly flirting with someone else in front of me and going so far as to undo a couple buttons on your shirt - am i not giving you enough attention, jagi? is that it?”

yoongi’s hand slithers to the back of your skirt and you feel him tug at the zipper playfully

immediately you reach behind and place your hand over his

“you have another meeting in like ten minutes” you remind yoongi and push at his chest gently

“and?”

“w-we can’t do anything in ten minutes”

“you should’ve thought about that before deciding to do what you did, missy” yoongi nips at your jaw before bringing you over to his desk

he shoves some of his stuff aside and a couple things clatter to the floor and ur like ok um u better piCK that shit up later

suddenly yoongi’s hoisting you up so you’re sitting on the desk

one thing that you’ve learned about yoongi is that he’s a very very stubborn man

“oH my god, yoongi~” you whimper and arch your back against the desk

your fishnet stockings have been shredded to nothing and they’ve been reduced to a pathetic pile on the ground but u know what it’s fine it’s SO FINE

your toes curl and your fingers grasp at yoongi’s silky locks

oh god

you’re almost there you’re so sososo close

“yoongi, ungh, p-please-“ you gasp desperately and yoongi grips at your thigh to keep you spread out on the desk

right as you’re about to see stars everything just sTOPS

your head is spinning from pleasure and you immediately sit up on the desk and look down to see yoongi adjusting himself in his trousers before he gets up and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand

“wha- wait, what are you-“

“my meeting! it’s in-“ he looks at his watch “well, two minutes.”

“but you can’t just leave-“

“i can. and i am. and you’re not allowed to touch yourself til i get back.” yoongi leans in to give you a kiss and you grab desperately at his shirt and whine

you immediately push yourself up against yoongi and he slots himself in between your legs automatically

you reach for his belt and he swats your hands away  

“nice try, missy” yoongi grins and gives your cheek a kiss before grabbing his phone off the desk “i’ll see you in an hour.” and then he shuts the door behind him and ur like EXCUSE ME AN HOUR

ok

u know what it’s fine

you can find a way to kill time

you let out a quiet groan and squeeze your thighs together

soon enough an hour rolls around

you look up at the clock while tapping your pen against the desk

you look down the hallway and let out a small groan

where the heLL is he

and then an hour bleeds into an hour and a half

you sigh and spin around in your chair while staring up at the ceiling

god is a woman and apparently she hates you because she’s torturing you by keeping yoongi busy

“the pleasure was all mine. my secretary will email you soon with some updates.” yoongi smiles politely and bows politely as the elevator doors close

he lets out a sigh and loosens his tie a little

that was a long lonG ass meeting  

he makes his way down the hallway and checks the time on his phone

huh

it’s been a while indeed

he can’t help but wonder how you’re holding up lol

he has to admit it was kind of a dick move to love u and leave u like that but the desperation in your eyes was so worth it

yoongi furrows his brows when he notices that you… aren’t at your desk

hm

you probably went to bother jimin or something

but a part of him is like,,, low-key disappointed because uhhHhH he’s still a little worked up from earlier and kinda wanted to take his frustrations out over his desk or against the wall or even against the window but u know what it’s fine

he steps into his office and-

“jesUS-“ you literally pop out of nowhere and grab yoongi by his tie and drag him over to the desk “hello to you too”

“how was your meeting?” you push yoongi down so he’s sitting on the edge of his desk and yoongi’s eyes wiDEN when you unbuckle his belt quickly and oh my god who is this sex fiend

“i mean it was okay-“ you crawl on top of him and you thank god that yoongi has such a spacious desk otherwise you 100% would’ve fallen off lol

he’s never seen you like this before but

he loves it    

“oh my god, yoongi” you breathe out and slide a hand down his bare chest

the two of you were so impatient that you’re basically both still fully dressed

yoongi’s still wearing his suit jacket

his dress shirt is mostly unbuttoned

his tie is hanging around his neck

his pants r basically still on  

your skirt’s been pushed up to your hips

your shirt has been completely unbuttoned but it’s still tucked into your skirt

your panties have just been pushed to the side like u couldn’t even bother taking them off because that’S how desperate you are

your dang glasses are sitting on the tip of your nose

“god, look at you” yoongi moans and bucks his hips up and he hits that spot making you mewl loudly

he pulls you down into a kiss and nips at your bottom lip and he knows you’re getting close because you’re moving at a quicker pace and your cheeks are flushed and your brows are furrowed and you just look so wrecked and he knows it’s all because of him

“yoongi, fuck, i’m gonna-“ you can’t even get a coherent sentence out because you’re so dizzy with pleasure

“gonna cum? hm?” yoongi thrusts upwards and you whine loudly

he knows your body better than anyone else and it doesn’t take him thAt long to figure out the formula

he slips his hand in between your legs and you practically start drooling at the sight of his veins in his arms becoming more prominent as he rubs over your clit  

“that’s my girl” yoongi groans when you cum around him and nuzzle your face into the crook of his neck

and now that you’re done

it’s his turn

“want you to cum inside” you murmur shyly and start quickening your pace again because one of your favourite sights in the entire world is seeing yoongi all dazed and blissed out because of y o u

yoongi knows it’s not long til he cums because the sight of you bouncing on his dick has his breathing all ragged and his brain turns into mush  

“mr min? i have the copies those contracts you asked for”

yoongi curses at the interruption and he squeezes your hip when you start to slow down

he 100% expects you to stop and freak out and hoP off at the realisation that jimin is right outside the door

what he doesn’t expect is for you to go haRDER

“baby, holy f- nngh fuck fuCk” yoongi grabs a handful of your ass as you bounce on top of him and for the first time ever he’s struggling to keep quiet

he grips onto the edge of the desk while his other hand grips at your waist

“you can just leave them on y/n’s desk!” yoongi stammers and groans lowly when you clench around him

oh god he’s so close

“okay! i’ve arranged them alphabetically so it’s easier to-“

“okAY THANKS JIMIN YOU CAN LEAVE NOW” jimin jumps in surprise and is like jEEz okay fine i’m leaving god

yoongi’s always liked kissing you when he cums and now is no different

you can’t help but giggle against his mouth when he groans lowly and squeezes your hip

he thrusts into you one two three more times until lifting you off of him and just lying down on his back and staring up at the ceiling

wow

that was

that was pretty fckin good

10/10 would recommend

“you ripped another pair of my stockings” you murmur while doing up yoongi’s shirt and yoongi squeezes your bum playfully  

“they weren’t work-appropriate anyway”

later on jimin finds out why yoongi was so desperate for him to leave when he notices you are no longer wearing stockings at the end of the day

“ohhhhhhhhhhhhh……..HHHHH MY GOOOODDDD YOU WERE FCKING OUR BOSS WHILE I WAS TALKING TO HIM”

needless to say jimin will never knock on yoongi’s door again if you’re not sitting at your desk lol