#it wasnt an omg so crazy and exciting thing

[ssaltlicker]

Man aggretsukos ending was underwhelming.

[inbabylontheywept]

bad dating stories time: the shoe incident

so in highschool, my best friend wasnt allowed to go on dates unless there was another couple there to keep an eye on him. part of this was his parents being insane, but also, part of it was him being insane. in a problem with no reasonable parties, there are no reasonable solutions.

at some point in my junior year, my sorta-gf broke up with me, and i just wasnt feeling dating, which was bad for my friend, because he had a good thing going with a girl he met in court.

he kind of hounded me about it. kept pushing me to just put me feet back in the dating pool and i wasnt real thrilled about it, because i knew he was pushing me for his own benefit, not mine, so i kept telling him to fuck off, and after a few weeks of being told that i would date when i was damn well ready, he eventually said: okay. what if i paid for the date AND found you a blind date AND all you had to do was show up?

and i shouldve said no, i know, but i let him wear me down, and i will own my fault in that. a date starting on such a stupid premise could never have gone well.

but he still managed to find a way to make it worse.

i dont know how long he tried to set a blind date up. it couldve been multiple attempts. he couldve stooped to this immediately. but what happened in the end was that he called a girl from the ward he attended - a girl that he knew had a giant, mushy crush on him - and he said: hey! how would you feel about going on a date this weekend?

(you know, implying it was with him, but never actually saying it.)

and she said YES WOW I WOULD LOVE TO and he said great! and then he called me up and said he found me a date.

i did not learn about his crimes until several weeks later. i will die swearing before god almighty that i would never have allowed this travesty to happen if i had known.

that was on a monday. the date of the date rolled around that friday evening, and im sorry to confess, i really phoned the whole thing in. i showed up in my favorite comfy outfit, which was also a fashion crime: basketball shorts and flipflops and a baja hoodie. it was super comfy but it made me look kind of crazy. i picked him up first, and then i picked up his date next, and then we went to pick up my date, and thats where you're gonna get the play by play.

i arrived, walked across the yard, and knocked on the front door. she opened it almost immediately, like shed been waiting right by it, and i could see her expression go from OMG IM SO EXCITED to super disappointed, then disgusted and finally pissed. and because i didn't know about my friends sins, i thought it was from my outfit. which seemed... harsh. like, hey, im allowed to be quirky, fuck you. also its a blind date, i thought the deal was that we were both going to be sad broken sacks of mortality.

anyway, we looked at each other for several seconds before she slammed the door in my face.

i looked back at my friend. he was sweating bullets. i dont know what he expected from this, but there was this big long pause where we both tried to figure out what to do, and then the door opened up, and her dad invited me in, and he said she was gonna need a few minutes to finish getting ready, and that in the meantime we could sit and talk.

we did not talk. we did sit. i sat down on the couch, and he sat down in a chair across the couch, and then instead of talking he cleaned his pistol on the coffee table. i wasnt actually sure if it was a threat, or if it was just a fidget thing for 40+ year old republican men, but when i tried to help he got snappy so i just watched him put a pistol back together.

he was okay at it.

eventually my date came downstairs, still mad as hell for reasons beyond my ken, and i felt pretty guilty for being such a mess because i thought that was why she was so angry. i tried to make up for by walking her to the car and getting the door for her, just generally trying to be extra polite, but before i could make it back to the drivers side, her dad called me back to the door. so i flipped around, went to the door, and immediately regreted my decision.

soon as i was within range, her dad got waaaay too close to me, leaned in, and said "whatever you do to her, i will do to you," and my brain went into overdrive making three consecutive realizations.

realization one was, damn, the pistol thing was a threat. that sucks. what an asshole. realization two was, wait, im autistic and even i know theres a 0% chance me and my date even hold hands, least of all boink. does this guy actually think there's even a 1% chance of anyone in that car getting laid tonight? is he an idiot? and then realization three went through, which was wait, is this guy threatening to fuck me? and unfortunately, with my brain doing so much processing, my mouth was left to run amok, so somewhere between realization 2 and 3, i said:

"i can't get pregnant"

which, i swear, wasn't actually me trying to be a smartass, it was just me pointing out that he couldn't actually follow up on that threat. it just wasn't possible. we do not live in the omegaverse and im not scared of you.

still, it was an insanely catastrophic thing to say, and the moment we both heard it, we bluescreened. that single sentence obliterated both of our momentary streams of consciousness like a saltine in front of a sand blaster. problem was, he'd probably gone his whole life not even realizing someone could say something that stupid, and making that realization was going to cost him a lot of thinking time. me though? i had been saying shit like that for 17 years, i didnt have to rewrite my expectations of human nature, i just had to plan an exit and start striding. so i was already halfway back to the car before i heard "hey. hey come back. Hey. Hey. HEY. HEY WAIT. HEY GET BACK HERE. HEY-"

and then i was in my car, and i drove away.

if this happened today, he'd have called her, and the whole thing wouldve imploded then and there, but back then, there were still a decent number of teenagers without cell phones. especially the teenagers of insane, gun toting parents. so she just said: whoa what was that all about? and i said: dont worry about it, he'll tell you about it when you get home.

and she said: ok and went back to staring daggers at me and my friend.

WHICH SURPRISINGLY isnt even how the story ends.

we went to an improv comedy show, and it was a disaster. it shouldve been like, 7/10 tops, but between my date being mad, and my friend having a good time, and me having the existential terror of knowing that a guy with a pistol was probably waiting outside his house for me to come back, it was easily 11/10. i laughed way too hard at everything. especially the jokes that flopped. id sit there in this mostly silent room and laugh until i dry heaved a little, and my date was absolutely disgusted, and even my friend was a little embarrassed, which would just make me laugh harder. i laughed so hard that night i could barely talk the next day. and then the show ended, and my friend said, you know, that was a good time, but i think we should maybe do something a little chiller? who wants to walk around the park? and his date said yeah, and my date said no, and i finally had mercy on the poor woman so i said, look, im gonna drop you off. and i am so, so sorry about this, but im dropping you off like a block away. super duper sorry.

do talk to your dad about the pistols thing if you dont want this happening more in the future tho.

and she said: okay. so i dropped her off, and she walked a block down, and that was that.

then i drove my friend and his date to a park that was good for wandering. i figured they wanted something more private, so instead of following them around point blank, i chose a park with this 30 foot rope tower, and i climbed to the top and i said: hey i can see you anywhere from up here, you are officially chaperoned from a distance. get panopticoned idiot. except my friend really is an idiot, and he didnt really get the whole 'now i dont have to third wheel so insanely hard with you guys' thing so he climbed up the tower too, and then his date followed behind him, so there are three people basically sitting together on top of a telephone pole.

and then they started making out.

i was close enough to hear it.

i didnt really know what to do so i was just kind of sitting there, dissociating, when some college kids came around and started shaking the tower. my friend's date went aaaaaaaaaa im afraid of heights :( and my friend went oh, dont worry, ill hold you tight ;) and i went hey, im gonna climb down and ask them to stop.

so i did climb down, and i did ask them to stop, and they flipped me off, which i wasnt even mad about. at that point i was i was like yeah, it would be weirder if this wasnt a mess. gods plan has been to fly this day like a 747 into my metaphorical twin towers and brother he is close enough for me to see him grinning through the cockpit window. still, eventually the college students got bored, so they climbed up the tower, which gave my friend and his date a window to climb down, and together we walked back to my car.

now, i cant explain why this is, but sitting back in the drivers seat was my carriage-back-into-a-pumpkin moment. i'd been chill about all the chaos, just rolling with the punches, but sitting down made me realize how much of a shitshow the day had been, and while i couldnt go back and fix all of it, i could go back and fix one thing.

so i told my friend and his date, hey, you two, stay here and don't do anything weird. don't. then i walked back to the rope tower, and i started picking up the shoes the college students had left at the base in order to climb.

about halfway through this, i realized that if i took all their shoes, they might think i was in it for the money, and i actually wanted them to know i was in it specifically to spite them. fuck those guys. so i put all the right shoes back, gave myself a 100 foot headstart, yelled "nice shoes, assholes", did a little jig, and started running.

my advice to everyone is that college students are faster than you think. even with the headstart, and the whole climb down the tower thing, i was still only fivish seconds ahead of them by the time i got to my car. i flung the door open, looked in the backseat, didnt see anyone, flung the stolen shoes in the backseat, heard two "ow"s, took that as proof of presence, jumped in and pealed out of the lot.

my friend and his date popped up a few seconds later. they were, uh, doing something weird in the back seat. my one request - obliterated.

they climbed up to ask where the hell all the shoes had come from, and i was like yeah i stole them from the college students, and they were like oh. cool. hope you had fun. and i was like, i did. i did. but speaking of fun, what were you doing back there?

and for the first time in my buddies life, i think he was actually embarassed.

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

Ok i just remembered this freaky story out of nowhere. My mind totally blocked this out for so long im not sure why it just came up. basically this is the first time i ever saw true magic at work , magic of the darker variety..

basically one time in 2016 i was dating this girl who worked at the same place as me. Our boss was SOOOO cruel to me, she was mean to everyone but it was really obvious she picked on me specifically, and it only amplified as time went on. i really felt she hated me and put up with so much torment. it made my gf so mad, but there wasnt rly anythign we could do because we liked out jobs other than that one thing & we didnt want to quit

So one day she approached me all excited, she was like, "OMG *bosses name* left her hairbrush in the bathroom and i stole a bunch of her hair so i can put a binding spell on her , then she'll stop bullying you :D"

i was genuinely freaked out, i was like Um, idt you should do that, it rubbed me the wrong way. But she was a headstrong person so nevertheless she texted me later saying she did the spell.

Next day i go into work and i kid you not, i kid you fucking not, my boss was acting like a DIFFERENT FUCKING PERSON. brand fucking new. She literally was sitting there with a coffee waiting for me !! Saying some shit like "i dunno, i'm just feeling really grateful for you today *^_^*" And for the rest of the time i worked there she straight up never bothered me again, she praised everything i did, i became like her number 1 angel star. it was undeniable that something major had changed about her.

idk if it was like, karmic consequences of the spell but my relationship with the girl who casted it went soooo sour really quickly after that. within a few months we were not even on speaking terms anymore and ignored each other at work lol. Still, that was like, a crazy experience of magic that shook me up. it was so surreal, the difference in my bosses behavior was so severe and so IMMEDIATE..

I definitely dont condone that kind of work, even if she meant well and just wanted to help me, messing with people's free will is never it for me :x especially stealing the hair, i think on a subconscious level i could never trust that girl after that. Like that is just straight up conniving. Be careful with your hairbrushes and nail clippings around witchy people you guys X_X

thats my story! ive never known anyone who's been that serious about magic since then so it's the only story i have.

[froznwater]

I love seeing all ur aus they’re so yummy :) ur fanfics r acc the reason I started to use Ao3 it very much scared me at first tho (I missed a tag once…)

But anyway, would assistant Noah like live in that house that the winners got in all stars? And it’d be like Ale would he more likely to win challenges bc of it since he gets softer during all stars

READ THE TAGS YOU GUYS OMG, very important(someone said they missed a tag on spanish translator im going to hope that wasnt you LMAO) but thank you!!!!! it's kinda crazy the amount of people that have told me i introduced them to ao3/alenoah. happy to do so tho <3

OKAY, now, when any of you ask about my AUs knows you are going to get a lengthy response because I use them as excuses to talk about AUs. I think it would be exciting if he was suppose to stay in the same sector as the interns, but either Noah sneaks out, because they are all fans and annoying/gross/etc and jut sleeps int he winners house when he can. OR Chris starts using him to stir drama (Chris has a great legal team that covers all bases. There's a reason he excluded the part about kissing contestants >:)) I think it would be super funny to do this early in the fic:

"He's evil." Noah whispers as he gently closes the bedroom door. There's cameras all around the house, they'll turn on at the slightest noise. Alejandro peaks at him through one open eye and slowly sits up, "What?"

"Mike. He's get some multiple personality thing and he's not Mike anymore, his name is Mal."

Alejandro stares at him like he's grown a second head. "What is this, an aLIEance?"

Noah deadpans, traveling carefully through the room. "That joke sucked." When he reaches the edge of the bed he continues, "I'm not lying."

He shoves Alejandro a CD.

AND TRHEN THEY VOTE OFF MAL AND THAT PLOT JUST IS LIEK SOOOO SILLY AND GONE!!! But mal would probably have to stick around for a while. But they could sneak off to the confessional, in the night to the woods, to the winners house, etc to exchange info. Noah really doesnt like any of the new guys, and doesnt want them to win at all. So he's helping the villians, through Alejandro. just saying, if they aren't enemies, they are friends. Friends who could get a lot of shit done.

[akaakeis]

HEY HEY HEEEEYYYYYYY bokuto moment

HI SAV<33

first of all shut up and pretend I didn't see ur sideblog posts THE THING IS I LOVE LOVE LOVE SENDING ASKS BUT LIKE I DIDN'T KNOW IF ITD BE FREAKY TO SEND RANDOM ASS ASKS TO YOU EVEN THO I BLEAT IN UR DMS EVERY OTHER SECOND

N E WAYS HIIII im having lunch rn !! IT RAINED SO BAD SO ITS LIKE 5PM AND IM STILL IN MY UNIFORM AND STUFF i had like.. stuff planned on my schedule and stuff :cccccc

dude the way i do NAWT feel like writing at all but also im dying to get yns pov in the first chapter like PICK A FUCKING SIDE OMFG literally had to pause writing this to think

TODAY I CORRECTED THE ENGLISH TEACHERS GRAMMAR IT WAS SO FUNNY LIKE I WAS WRITING AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS HUGE ASS WHITEBOARD SO I WAS KNEELING ON THE GROUND AND SHE GOES TO CORRECT SOMEONE'S (ALREADY CORRECT) GRAMMAR AND I LOOK UP TO HER LIKE UH NO THAT'S RIGHT ACTUALLY AND SHE DIDN'T EVEN QUESTION IT JUST TOOK IT LIKE A CHAMP??? LIKE GIRL WHEN EVEN U KNOW UR WRONG????

THE SENTENCE WAS monica went to her grandmother's house for summer vacation AND SHE MADE IT WEIRDER SOUNDING "during vacation" LIKE GIRL NO??????????? sorry for ranting god im such a hater

AND LIKE THESE FUCKASS TEACHERS WONT SEE MY TEXTS (i love them) BUT THE EXACT SECOND I PULL UP TO THEM AT SCHOOL IM GETTING MY CHEEKS TUGGED AT LIKE "oh em gee alina u did such a great job we r sooo proud of u" DIE. AND IM SO SCARED CUZ IM NOT STUDYING PROPERLY OR ENOUGH I THINK AND MY SCHEDULE IS SO FREAKY AND WEIRD AND THE !! RAIN !! EW 🤮🤢🤮🤢 not that i hate the rain, it just conveniently happens NOT when im at home ready to go to school, but rather otw to school or otw home so i'm just late everywhere. also MY WATER BOTTLE DISAPPEARED?? AND THERES A GIRL W THIEVING TENDENCIES IN CLASS LIKE IM NOT POINTING FINGERS BUT BUT BUUUUUUUT um. ANWYAYS I SAW A SUBMERGED MOTORCYCLE AND ALSO MY CHEM TEACHER TAKING PICS OF THE FLOOD LIKE WTF HE WANT THEM FOR "look wife im not cheating im actually trapped in school"

dude.. biceps r so..... like... kuroo... IM LOWK A KUROO ENTHUSIAST HE IS SO YUMMY LIKE U JUST KNOW HED LET U BITE IT (my intrusive thoughts r like. if he existed irl. nom nom time) NOT EVEN IN A SEXUAL WAY BTW I JUST NEED A CHOMP

ANYWAYS I FOUND OUT LIKE RN THAT I GOT 77/90 IN PAPER 1 AND 95/110 IN PAPER 2 OF BANGLA AND I ONLY GOT AN A* BECAUSE OF THE THRESHOLD (171) LIKE WHAAAT. (I GOT 172)

ITS 5:18PM RN AND IM GNA TAKE THE FASTEST FUCKING SHOWER OF MY ENTIRE LIKE CUZ MY HAIR GREASY ASF AND ITS SO EW AND THEN ILL DO CHEM NOTES HASHTAG STUDYING TRUST ME ! ! !

ANYWAYS last anyways of the day HRU MY BABY POOKIE PIE DARLING SWEETHEART POPEYES MUFFIN CUPCAKE HONEYPIE POPSICLE POOKIEBRO HOW WAS UR SLEEP HOW WAS UR YESTERDAY HOW IS UR LIFE WHATS GOING ON AND ALSO ALSO ALSO i forget give me a sec um erm ueueue OH I GOT IT I ABSOLUTELY ADORE U FOR READING ALL OF THE THINGS I SEND U LIKE!!!!! SHIRRJSKSKSOKSKS ILY okbye!!

HEY LINA!!

yeah im gonna act like u didnt see that sideblog post bc i SAID i wasnt trying to hint at anyone... AND NO THATS NOT FREAKY?? idk man i send in asks to ness like every day bc i think its fun to talk that way!! paragraph asks are genuinely so fun to receive!! ALSO USING THE WORD BLEAT IS CRAZY YOU R NOT BLEATING IN MY DMS

omg i hope you had a good lunch!! im answering this like an hour later so i assume u already finished? idk its weird that we're 12 hrs apart 😭 AND NOOO THATS AWFUL :(( sorry to hear that love :( hopefully the rain didn't flood any area and you and your fam are all good!!

HELP THATS SUCH A REAL FEELING i was battling with that yesterday so bad omf... i feel like sometimes we can attach somewhat negative connotations w writing bc sometimes it can feel like a chore? so sometimes it's a struggle to get up and decide to write? maybe thats js me but like yeah 😓 BUT GENUINELY SO EXCITED FOR YOUR APOCALYPSE AU!! ITS BEEN AMAZING SO FAR!! AND ANYTHING IVE READ FOR IT MAKES ME WANT TO LET OUT AUDIBLE SOBS ‼️ that sounds negative but i feel like you get why i want to LIKE GOOD GRIEF anyway write whenever you feel like it!! dont force it <3

THERES NO WAY??? PLEASE THATS SO FUNNY TO ME 😭 I LOVE THAT SHE DIDNT EVEN QUESTION IT OMG? YOU PROBABLY SPEAK MUCH MORE FLUENTLY THAN HER ANYWAY LMAOAOAO BUT PROUD OF YOU!!

okay like maybe im stupid but i feel like both of those sentences make sense? like "monica went to her grandmother's house for summer vacation" makes sense but so does "monica went to her grandmother's house during vacation" it's just that it doesn't specify whether it's during summer vacation so it can sound awkward ig?? idk man ive been stuck reading old english for the last couple of days bc of the hobbit (I DESPISE THAT BOOK IT CAN GO DIE) sigh

HELP?? I MEAN IM SO HAPPY YOURE GETTING GOOD GRADES THO!! AS LONG AS YOURE ABLE TO STUDY JUST ENOUGH SO THAT YOURE CONFIDENT IN THE TOPIC THEN I THINK YOURE GOOD HONESTLY 😨 and the rain sounds like its out to get u thats wild??? PLEASE im not pointing my finger at anyone... im just agreeing here... there's a chance 😭 having classmates with tendencies to steal is such a pain in the ass tho i hope you're able to retrieve your water bottle!! AND HELP I LOVE THE WAY YOU DUBBED THAT "im not cheating im actually stuck in school" had me giggling sm

HELLO? BITING KUROO'S BICEP IS INSANE (but lowkey i would too VERY LOWKEY because i feel like im not super attracted to big biceps and stuff idk?? but just a little chomp 😋😋)

WHATATATAT AT LEAST YOU GOT A* THOUGH ‼️ GOOD JOB!!!

AAA ENJOY YOUR SHOWER! I HOPE IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER!! AND YES WE LOVE A RESPONSIBLE STUDIOUS GIRL 😋

AND IM ACTUALLY DOING GOOD MY POOKIE WOOKIE SUGAR PLUM COOKIE BROWNIE PUMPKIN PIE HONEY LOML (i laughed an obscene amount while writing that)!! TODAY IM GONNA BE SUPER BUSY.. I HAVE SPEECH AND DEBATE AFTER MY SCHOOL DAY IS OVER AND THEN I HAVE VOLLEYBALL PRACTICE UNTIL... 7 PM???? I THINK???? GOD. AND I SLEPT SUPER DUPER WELL I WOKE UP RLY COZY IN MY BED AND IM STILL HUDDLED UP IN HERE LMAOAOAO 😭 YESTERDAY WAS GOOD!! I DIDNT HAVE ANYTHING I NEEDED TO DO SO I GOT TO CHILL AT HOME AND LISTEN TO MUSIC AND LITTLE PODCASTS (i listen to the bit my tongue podcast by nailea devora SOOO MUCH) AND AWHAGSHHA LINA!! I ADORE EVERYTHING YOU WRITE AND ANYTHING YOU SEND TO ME!! ILL ALWAYS MAKE TIME TO READ SOMETHING YOU SEND ME!! ILY!! <3

[secretcheesecakecat]

For the fanfic idea!

TenjikuMikey x fem!reader (or GN!Reader) where he went to her house after the fight. She asks him if hes okay (she wasnt there for the battle) and he tells her that hes fine. He swears by it but then once he goes to change into new clothes in her room, he begins to feel the weight of Izana and Emma dying so he breaks down. Hiccups, sobs and whimpers and the reader finds him with his jacket off, just an absolute mess of a man. :0

{First fanfict, omg im so excited!}

Title: It comes for us all~

Warning: Angst, mention of the dead, angst with fluff, blood

It was one of does days when Mikey, wasn't Mikey. When Toman had a fight, a big one...

--------------------------------

*ding, ding*

The sound of a doorbell wake you up from a dream, a bad dream. You opend the door just to see your boyfriend standing right in front of you, bleeding. Not knowing if it was his or someone else's.

"Mikey...? We talked about this..." You said letting him in the house. "You can't just show up at the time like this Emma will start to worry about you-! Not to meantion you're covered in blood!"

'Emma...' The word that rang in his head. 'Emma is gone, no one will worry about me...' The only words in his head at the moment, before you snap your finger in front of his face.

"Earth to Mikey!" Mikey looked at you, pushing away his sadness. "Im sorry cupcake, i didn't mean to make you mad. But, c-can i stay over the night, please?"

Since you couldn't say no to your boyfriend you let him stay over. "Alright, you know where my room is so go change. Okej?" Mikey looked at you tring to smile. "Mhmm, be right back" As he was walking up to your room, he looked a bit, off....? "Mikey, are you alright?" Your voice shook his whole body, he didn't wanted to worry you, he didn't wanted to lie to you, but he couldn't tell you.... no, not now.

"Yeaaa, im alright. Just, ya know, fight and all-"

"I know, but you never look like that. You sure your good?"

"Yes, im fucking sure-!!"

You both couldn't belive that he yelled at you, he didn't mean to- it was just to much. "[Name], babe im sorry. I didn't mean to-!"

"No, its alright. Go change dear, i'll wait for you here..."

Mikey couldn't fight you know. He didn't wanted to get you mad, he didn't wanted to hurt anyone else, so he just noded and walked into your room.

Mikey started to change his clothes, opening your wardrobe the picture of you, him and Emma standing on one of the shelfs. "Emma..." He said in shaking voice, taking one of the shirts he left at you're house last time he was there.

"Emma, is [Name] right? Would you worry about me if you were here...?"

And here it is again, the sounds. They sounds of Emmas last words, her saying 'i love you big brother' over and over, repeating themselves like a broken tape. Izanas words, his words of hatred towards him. He couldn't take it anymore. He broke down crying and shaking like crazy...

The next thing he knew you opend the door. "Mikey, are you-" you stand there, looking at him, not knowing how to react, "are you okej?"

Mikey tried to stand up, but he was to week. To week and scared to look at you in the eyes.

"[Name], im sorry... They are dead..."

You ran up to him not knowing what to do, who is dead? What is he talking about?

"Mikey? What are you saying, who is dead?"

"All of them!" He cried out, crashing into your arms tring to find comfort. "Emma was killed by Kisaki today, and Izana too!"

The tears fall down your cheek. You bestfriend is dead? And the unknow boy Mikey talked about the other day, saying something about him being Shins brother, got Mikey so shoked.

You hugged him tighter, both you holding onto each other like your lives depened on it.

"It's okej..." You said softly brushing his hair off his face. "It's not your fault-"

"It is! I didn't get to protect them, i- just i-!"

"Shhshhh, its alright..." Pushing his hair off his face so you could look at him closer. "They wouldn't want to see you like this. Not Emma, not even Izana. And-" You pulled away to look at him "Especially not Shin..."

Mikey seemed to have calm down a bit, after you hold him for a while now. And he finaly decided to speak.

"Im sorry for this... im sorry for worring you, i-" He hugged you again. "Just please... promise you won't leave me too..."

Looking at him, his small and week form, kissing his forehead. "You know, sooner or later it comes for us all..."

Melting in you're arms, he spoked quetly. "I know but promise you won't leave me soon... promise you won't leave me soon like they did..."

Standing up, and pulling out your arm for him to reach. "I promise." Smiling at you, he took your hand, you leading him into a living room.

"Let's just cuddle a little and try to watch a movie." You said sitting down on a couch, Mikey following after you.

You cuddle each other for an hour when he falled asleep. When you notice, you kissed him forehead, whispering to him. "Sleep well my angel, while you're on it, I'll protect you from everything and everyone.."

The end <3

[bluewormonastring]

My live reactions to season 2 (episode 1)

SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY KIDS READ AT UR OWN RISK

Holy shit I’m so excited

Oh my god

Oh my god

Oauxbwkxjwhz

LOVE THE BLACK SCREEN W A SHARP CUT TO THE BEACH 10/10

OMG WE GET THE STEDE AND IZZY BEACH SWORD NOW? SO SOON? YOU SPOIL ME OFMD

Omg he’s been stabbed this is for sure a dream sequence

STEDE THATS MURDER EVEN IF ITS JUST IN YOUR HEAD

“You absolute twa….” BEST DYING WORDS EVER ILY IZZY ALWAYS AND FOREVER

THE SLOW RUN TOWARDS EACH OTHER OMG

AND STEDES FACE AND HIS VOICE AND AWW BABY

AWWW THE WAY THEY CRASHED INTO EACH OTHER

“BABE” HA FOWIHXBWNA I WAS NOT PREPARED

“I KNEW YOUD FIND ME LOVE”

“Fuckin love the beard mate”

Oh we’ve started farting lovely

OH MY GOD I WASNT PREPARED FOR HOW ID FEEL WHEN IT CUT TO HIM WITH EVERYONE AWW MY BABIES IVE MISSED YOU SO MUCH

“Cant be worse than you moaning ‘Ed oh ed’ all night” ILY PETE

Iconic title screen as always

“DEAR ED” AHHHH

SPANISH JACKIE ILY

Instantly taking an interest in the Swede as we knew would happen but still iconic

Ugh I love Leslie jones did I mention I love Leslie jones

Nat looks so scared aww baby

I love wee John being security

And host stede aww baby

I live for black Pete dealing with working in customer service

And all of them tbh

Aww poor buttons he needs his ocean and Livy

I’m ngl for a second I was like “where’s Fred armisen- oh wait”

ITS THE I THINK OF YOU OFTEN LINE YESS

HELLO YES I ADORE IZZY HANDS HE CAN DO NO WRONG IDC WHAT YOU SAY IVE MISSED MY BABY BOY

Ahh the wedding

“Demon? *shakes head* I’m the fucking devil” AHH

Guys were only 6 minutes in and this post is already long as shit so buckle up (if ur actually reading it lmao my ass would be like nope too long”

THERES MY VICO HELLO VICO ILY AND MY JOEL FRY ILY BABIES

Ah yes ye olde put trauma in a box in lock it

Awww fang baby boy someone give him a hug find him Lucius

Omg it’s the “you dumped him” scene

“Did everyone get some cake” because he’s still our precious little angle

HE JUST SNORTED RHINO HORN IS THAT A THING WAS THAT A THING IN HISTORY HUH

NO ITS THIS SCENE I DONT WANNA WATCH MY BABY BE SAD

Yes hello I love Izzy hands I would protect him with my life little baby boy

Vico looks so done w his ass

Someone give my baby a hug

Ily fang

The tears in his eyes during “unhand me” aww Angel

AWW IZZY

CONNOTHAN O NONNATHAN WE LOVE YOU YOU PRECIOUS LITTLE BOY UR ABSOLUTE PERFECTION YOU ANGEL

I love the friendship Jim and that girl have

Oh shit Jackie

“BOO CAKES” JACKIE

Stede honey you’re not intimidating

“I know that guy we had breakfast together” “you’ll be having a lot of breakfastes together” “oh okay 🙂” ily Swede

HIM DOING AN ED IMPRESSION LMAO “could be. Could be mate.”

“You’re my hero” 😞😕🙂😏

Swede bein a cute lil double agent

AWW SWEDE “my time with Jackie has been the happiest of my life. Her love has helped me locate parts of myself I didn’t even know existed and reclaim others that I have long missed” ILY

“Tonight is my turn to perform the husbandly duties”

“That’s another toe” ED YOU STAY AWAY FROM HIM LEAVE MY BABY ALONE

“Who am I to you” aww Izzy Angel baby he’s accepting it OMG “I have love for you Edward” IZZY YOURE SAYING IT OUT LOUD IM SO PROUD OF YOU BUD

IZZY YOU DID NOT JUST SAY TALK IT THROUGH YOU HAD TO HAVE KNOWN THAT WAS A HORRIBLE IDEA

OMG AND THE SHIFT IN THE MUSIC AS SOON AS HE SAID IT

IZZY RUN

RUN MY BABY BOY RUN

“As a crew” OH EDDDDD

ED DONT POINT A GUN AT JIM

OR ANYONE ELSE

THAT INCLUDES YOURSELF EDWARD TEACH BORN ON A BEACH

“They think ya crazy” cackling his face omg

Go taika absolutely slaying this scene

The way the camera is all like jittery is so good

Jim’s like “beard” makes their chin look like… not caved in but idk like it looks like they have a rly bad overbite yk

“Everyone knows why” “I don’t. Enlighten me” “your feelings for stede fucking bon-“ *GUNSHOT* ARE U SHITTING ME EDWARD NO WE DO BOT SHOOT FRIENDS

OH MY GOD HE MADE FRENCHIE FIRST MATE HOLY SHIT

Oh my god Izzy my poor baby Izzy oh my god how dare you hurt my Izzy

LMAO SWEDE

“FUCK THOSE HAMMIES UP” LMAO

There’s like no way there’s actually anything valuable in that chest

WE GOT TO SEE HER TAKE A NOSE FOR THE NOSE JAR YESSS

OH SHIT INDIGO

“Now give me back my blue shit STEVE”

Susan’s hot

DONT HURT SWEDE

Oh good okay we’re cool

I feel like she’s lying tho

But for now we’re cool

AWW FANG

AWW JIM COMFORTING FANG

“WANNA HEAR THE STORY OF THE WOODEN BOY” AWW

Living for vico using they them for the puppet

“DO THE VOICE” AWW

OMG VICO THATS ICONIC

AWW YAY THEYRE LAUGHING NOW THOSE ARE MY BABIES YAY

Living for buttons reuniting with the ocean

Okay roll credits cheers yall see you next episode

[voidsuites]

RAHHHHH I LOVE YOU MORE

i wasnt even gonna come on here rn bc there’s no way i’m fully coherent but then i did and i saw that u WERE WONDERING WHERE I WAS????? ooh girl i’m about to cry so i gotta change the subject-

my friend and i only had single park tickets but i fear im too much of a dca slut we had to add on a park hopper because WHEW. like not to geek out this late but avengers campus opening was one of the greatest things to ever happen she says as she lays down in her new stark industries sweatshirt like ugh. i’m lowk such a spiderman girl.

anyways ugh i’m jelly of ur princess and the frog ears i THOUGHT the ride was open this month but i guess it’s november and i was so sad like that’s been one of my absolute favorite movies since it came out god it makes me sob every time (dig a little deeper is the song of all time)

back to art… imagine his face when you finally say you’ll go with him to make a lightsaber. his face lighting up as he picks out each little detail god i love seeing people’s inner child shine through it’s so beautiful

i fear i need to stop right here or ill start talking about the human experience and the multitudes of joy we’re bound to witness and feel every single day and yada yada yada should’ve applied as a philosophy major

goodnight lovey ugh us rambling back and forth makes me so happy

- 🧸

no yeah bc i think about all of you all the time. you’re all my little friends in my phone and i do miss you when you dip off the face of the earth for a sec. like 🍿 anon was missing for a bit and i was like omg where are they but they’ve been popping in again (lol hi pookie <3) but yeah i love you all sm and i love yapping with you guys <333333

i usually when i go to disney we just do one-park and disney bc 1) it’s so fucking expensive now for a park-hopper and 2) i personally think it’s easier to spend the whole day at just disney than just DCA but i LOVE DCA sm. stepping into avengers campus in 2021 for the first time was life-changing like i got chills 😭 also their shawarma? so yum considering it’s disneyland. but yeah i’m a spidey girl + nat girl + steve girl + t’challa girl + literally everyone bc i watched marvel stuff all the time as a kid (i really need to catch up on mcu stuff thunderbolts looks so so good. bucky… yelena…)

plus my other friend who works attractions at disney is going to work on the princess and the frog ride (she worked splash before it shut down) and she’s SO excited so i am too. i think i got my ears last nov in the newer shops towards the back of new orleans square but yeah seeing that movie in 2009 and feeling so seen/represented at like age 6 was crazy. that was my encanto fr. coLOMbiAAaaA… mi encanto… mi encanto

omg art would geek tf out building a lightsaber you know his ass would be taking everything seriously. i would like 2 see it.

AND OMG LOVE YOU TOO. talking with all of you is so much fun whether or not you’re anon i just love hearing about other people’s days n stuff. so glad u had a blast but i am still mad jealous LMAO 😭 love u

[delicatepoets]

mely!!!!! hi bestie!!!! i wanted to stop by ur inbox to say hi and wish u an amazing day and im hoping u get this weekend off <333 

i HAVE to tell u i finally saw saltburn!!!!! i was going to see priscilla but when i finally finished everything it wasnt playing anymore 😭 and i wanted to actually GO somewhere. u were SO RIGHT!!!!! the plot wasn’t that surprising, but the acting was so good (carrie mulligan and rosamund pike esp made me laugh sm). the style, the setting, the costume design, the music EVERYTHING WAS PERFECT!!!!!!!

LOVE YOUUUUU and ty again for always giving me all the best movie recs 💞💓💓💞💓💞💓💓

h!!!!!!!!!!!! my sweet angel bestie!!!!!!!!!!!!!! god ily so much! 😭 thank you!!!!!!!! i was working like crazy but it just made the holidays a little more special bcs my clients were in such a good mood! 🤭 i hope you had a good couple of days!!!! how was it?! tell me everything!!!!!

(saltburn spoilers below <3)

YEAHHHHHH!!!!!! SALTBURN NATION WE ARE SO UP!!!!!! i have completely immersed myself in everything “saltburn” and every time i rewatch a appreciate a new aspect or i find new things and its just one of those movies!!!!! as for the plot…, yes you are SO RIGHT! but the costumes and the thought that is put into every detail GOD! i want to spend the day in emerald fennells brain…. just one day pls! the acting!!!!!!!! GOD!!!!! everyone played their parts so perfectly! rosamund pike and carrie mulligan and barry keoghan are INCREDIBLE but EVERYONE ELSE KEPT UP AND IT WAS AMAZING TO WATCH! i loved alison oliver as venetia omg! she had some of my FAVORITE scenes !!! like this one!!!!!! OMG I LOVE!!

and archie madekwe as farleigh and of course jacob elordi as felix!!!!!!! everyone played their parts so perfectly!!! the costumes ans music were so true to the time period the story takes place in omg! i love saltburn so much omg i cannot WAIT for you to watch priscilla! i need every single thought you have on it!! i have seen so much about it and i am about to finish the book “elvis and me” which its based off of and its all making more sense so im excited to scream about it w you! (if you can’t find it playing anywhere lmk i will send you a link 🤭)

i love YOU and thank you for giving me all the freedom to scream about it w you! i love discussing movies w you and the fact that it isn’t just surface level stuff but how we got into even lighting and the writing, costumes, music, and framing and all that fun stuff 🤭🤭🤭 I LOVE YOU SO BAD OH MY GOD 💞💘💖💓🫂💘💞💖💓🫂

[causenessus]

HI HI HI HI NESS IM BACKKFJFKSMSOS so first of all tumblr hates me why is that the FOURTH ask of mine u answered that i wasnt notified of should i just die

anyways im eating lunch rn

healthy girl era did not work out i took a 6 hour (?) nap yesterday so!!

trying again today

N E WAYS

today the teacher told us her old students were too non che lent (nonchalant!!) so they failed the exam (wat.)

and my friend wanted to laugh about it w me but i wasnt looking so she yeeted my OTHER friends eraser at me

but it

it hit (near?) the teacher..

she was sooo mad omfg

giggling i hate her

like basically i answer all her questions out of spite now like YEAH BRO I KNOW THIS ALR😕😕

Also i swear i dif this math problem right but the teacher said it was wrong (wat.) and my friend did it too and we got the same answer (wat.)

i wrote fanfiction at school ☝️😎 it has already been digitalised but like i DID write it

and tjen my friend read an original short story (? 1.2k words) i wrote which was basically me projecting and she almost cried so like Uh

slay???

dude i love talking so much u have no idea actually

ALSO THE THING ABOUT THE ENRGY LIKe I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY OMG SO I GET EXCITED YK

n e ways..

i was watching american psycho last night but i got distracted..😭 ALSO IM SO EXCITED ABT ONICS LIKE EUSHEPSHAPSJXOSKAJDKAAKKDKD

>tries 2 normal

>fails

OK SO!! HRU AND WHATS GOING ON IN UR LIFE AND IF U EVER NEED TO HIRE A HITMAN IM HERE FOR U ❤️‍🩹 as the hitman btw ❤️‍🩹

U SHOULD NOT DIE!!! TUMBLR SHOULD DIE HOW DARE THEY!!! i am so confused at like what is happening at tumblr hq 😭😭 like there are problems that need to be solved!!!! and i feel like they should be pretty simple to fix!!! but instead they're like "NO LET'S MAKE TAGGING USERS GO BLUE AND COMMENTS UGLY"

but anyway!! i hope your lunch was good!! AND A SIX HOUR NAP SOUNDS AMAZING AND JUST AS PRODUCTIVE AS WORKING OUT!! it's hard to balance everything so definitely don't stress too much about it!! you have your whole life ahead of you to like do something like working out so not doing it one day is totally okay!! (yk?? i hope that made sense and i'm sorry i hope it's okay to say that 😭)

??? nonchalant -> failing exam???? i do not see the correlation??? 😭 YOUR TEACHER IS VV SPECIAL!! IS THIS THE ONE THAT TEACHES ENGLISH BUT ISN'T....ACTUALLY....THAT GREAT....AT ENGLISH??? 😭 OR MAYBE IT'S UR MATH TEACHER BC U ALSO SAID SOMETHING ABOUT THAT BUT THE ERASER ALMOST HITTING YOUR TEACHER IS CRAZY I WOULD'VE DIED ON THE SPOT 😭😭

also math teachers love to like??? tell u ur wrong and then not explain how to correctly do something??? so i think u should just blame them for everything!! that sounds fair <3

I'VE ALSO WRITTEN FANFICTION AT SCHOOL LMAOOO i remember being on my computer during french class and my guy was just so boring i pulled out the doc and started writing but LUCKILY it was like an oc fic so it wasn't as scary to write as a x reader UNLIKE WHEN I WAS MAKING TONIC PFPS AND MY DOCUMENT WAS LITERALLY CALLED LIKE yn & atsumu and for some reason all of my friends wanted to COME UP FROM BEHIND ME AND HUG ME!! OR LOOK AT MY SCREEN!! and i was just 😃😃😃 but i have no shame so oh well

THE ORIGINAL SHORT STORY SOUNDS GOOD!! ESP IF IT ALMOST MADE YOUR FRIEND CRY?? 😭 I HOPE YOU'RE DOING ALRIGHT THOUGH <3 AND I LOVE HEARING YOU TALK!! PLEASE TALK AS MUCH AS YOU WANT I WILL READ EVERYTHING YOU TELL ME <33

I'M SO SO GLAD YOU'RE EXCITED FOR TONICS!! I AM TOO <333 I'M SLOWLY PLANNING IT OUT LIKE ONE CHAPTER AT A TIME AND I'M LITERALLY SHAKING WITH EXCITEMENT OMG OMG OMG <33

THANK U LINA!!! I WOULD LOVE FOR U TO BE MY HITMAN <33 I MAY NEED ONE JUST TO GET THRU SCHOOL BC MY HALLS FR ARE SCARY SOMETIMES YK?? like too many scary girls who look me up and down in their little crop tops and shorts and nike air forces and are like "why are u wearing pants in the summer" BC I CAN?? AND I DON'T LIKE SHOWING THAT MUCH SKIN THANK U?? (sorry this probably makes no sense i think my brain has short circuited today </33) BUT I'M DOING ALR!!! i'm stressed about my theatre duties starting up very very soon 😭😭 but i'll let u know how that goes once they start!!! I HOPE YOU'RE DOING WELL TODAY!!! AND EAT SOMETHING GOOD <33

[bellysoupset]

SOUP!!!!!!!

oh my goodness this halloween saga is INSANEEEE AND I LOVE IT SO SO SO MUCH AGHHHH😭 i’ve had one of the worst weeks ever and i seriously think that reading this saga was one of the main reasons i made it thru LMAOooo

PLS THE ANGST WAS SPECTACULAR I CANT EVEN EXPLAIN TO YOU HOW MUCH I LOVED THESE FICS. everything with vin and luke was fucking adorable I LOVE THESE BOYS and their friendship so freaking much <3 then bella with jon RAH CHEFS KISS BC??? i LOVE that she was all calm and nonchalant and caring but also super chill about it while jon was kinda dying on the inside bc he wasnt being a “gentleman”, but at the same they both stayed playful and silly <333 and THEN MY BABY GIRL MY QUEEN GETTING ROOFIED????????? EXCUSE YOU BC HOW THE HECK DID YOU MANAGE TO EXCEED MY EXPECTATIONS????? like i really cannot tell you how excited i was about this and i wasnt sure how you were gonna approach the whole getting roofied thing but i fully trusted that you’d deliver the angst, AND oh my DID YOU‼️‼️‼️‼️

leo being so protective and worried about her???? both him and bella getting ARRESTED protecting her??????? AND JON’S PANIC GOSHHHHH IT WAS EVERYTHING IVE EVER WANTED TO READ‼️‼️‼️ the lack of sympathy sickness with someone other than leo??????? THE REASSURANCE WHEN SHE WAKES UP AND THE HURT AND HELPLESSNESS WHEN SHES SO OUT OF IT AND HE CANT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT????? THE WORRY AT THE HOSPITAL AND OMFG MY BABY VIN ALL PANICKED AND WORRIED AND BLAMING HIMSELF I CANT BREATHEEEEE 😭😭 and the arrest not being enough for him OOF I CANT DO THIS OMG THIS WAS SO FUCKING GOOD I LOVE YOUR OCs SO FUCKING MUCH SOUP😭😭😭😭😭

AND THE BELLA FIC HOLY MOLYYYYYYY😩😩😩 when i thought it couldnt get better and/or more angsty IT FUCKING DID and i enjoyed every minute of it AHHHHH🫶🏽 leo all worried and side eyeing her as he noticed something wasnt right and then giving her his jacket 😭😭😭 and then the whole conversation with luke where shes so out of it and OH MY GOODNESS WHEN SHE SPEAKS SPANISH WITHOUT REALISING IT‼️‼️‼️ THE WAY YOU INCORPORATED THAT WAS SO REALISTIC AND INSANE AND AMAZING AND TERRIFYING AND THEN SHE JUST PASSES OUT?????? HELLO I NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO MY GIRL AHHHH THIS WHOLE SAGA WAS CRAZY GOOD IM OBSESSED.

for real thank you so much for writing this and thus making my shitty week a lot less shitty❤️‍🩹 bc i swear that reading these restored the very much needed happy chemicals in my brain when nothing else could 😭🫶🏽

side note the whole ✨unknowingly speaking spanish✨ situation is so insane and important to me bc, as an international college student in the U.S. who plays a contact sport where it’s common to get concussions, this is LITERALLY ONE OF MY BIGGEST FEARS and OMFG you described the panic and confusion and fear (and just this whole situation im terrified of) SO fucking well AGHHHHH i know i say it all the time but YOU’RE SO FREAKING TALENTED DUDE PLS NEVER STOP WRITING 😩🫶🏽

- 🦦

Otter!! Hi!!

I adore your wall of texts sooo much!

I'm so sorry you had a crappy week Otter 🥺 I hope it's better now or at least that it's gonna start looking up soon!

It's funny you mentioned the unknowingly speaking spanish thing, because I do that all the damn time. English is not my first language but daily I find myself switching to english and then just being?? So confused when the people around me are not understanding.

End of the day, don't freak out if that does happen to you. Gestures is an universal language. You've got my whole heart as another bilingual person in the interwebs.

[fairybinie]

🫶 anon again!! :D aaaa this new chapter yeonbin are starting to make better choices we love to see it !!! everyone cutting min off is def progress on their ends and the besties™️ are plotting !!! itll be so funny if they actually go with the supply closet thing lmao 😭😭 if soobin and yeonjun actually Talk about what happened they’ll probably realize theyve hated each other this whole time purely due to miscommunication and min 😠😠😠 which would be crazy bc ??? i wonder how they’ll take that ??? it would really suck to completely cut off your best friend for years because of refusal to communicate (largely due to yeonjun refusing to listen) and then find out it wasnt even their fault. AND they’ve damaged current relationships over it too like they’re gonna have quite a time dealing w this omg ?? im still mad at them but i wish them good luck tbh 🫡🫡 im super excited for the future chapters and loved this one as always !! have a lovely day 🫶🫶🫶

hello my nonnie 🫶🏻 we need to start making progress somewhere!! and all your points are so valid like it’s actually quite embarrassing if you think about it (@ yeonjun!!) this next chapter is going to be written 🤐🤐 so i need to prepare myself for that lolzies but thank you for enjoying!! i hope you have a great day as well ❣️

[celestie0]

WOW ITALY THAT'S EXCITING! I’ve always wanted to visit Europe (or anywhere outside Asia) but I haven’t gotten the chance yet 😭💔 ESPECIALLY ITALY. I NEED TO EAT AT LEAST ONE PLATE OF PASTA IN ITALY BEFORE I DIE 👹

but oh my gosh it does suck to travel around when you aren’t feeling your best :((( I hope you’re feeling a lot better now, ellie! get lots of rest and drink plenty of water !! (not me lecturing the med student LMAO)

as for me, I’m doing good! I’ve been lazing around, enjoying my last few weeks of freedom before uni starts. I’ve also been self-studying pre-calc ! I took AP stats back in high school because the uni I was originally aiming for allowed students to take stats instead of calc so I never properly studied pre-calc and calc 😭 (I was homeschooled btw so my subjects were pretty flexible) but plans changed and I decided to enroll in a different uni that required to take both stats and calc for the course I’m taking soooo 💔😭

but on a happier note, I’m meeting up with a close friend I haven’t seen since her family moved to Australia about 10 years ago !! her flight is in a couple of weeks and I’m sooo soo excited wbdjssj!! we’re gonna gossip about lame irl boys and gush about hot fictional men for sure 🤫

that’s all from me for now! I hope you’re enjoying your vacation so far! 💖

- 🫶 anon

HIII darling omg i’m so sorry this took me a while to respond to things were a lil hectic over here 😭😭😭

HAHAH no fr the pasta here is magnificent and the pizza too. literally the most random spots on the side of the road have like the best pizza i’ve ever eaten in my life. it almost makes the travel nausea n dehydration n chronic exhaustion worth it ��🤣 (i am such a delicate person)

thanks my love!! gosh idk i’ve just been STRUGGLINGGG out here like my body really struggles when it’s been taken out of its ecosystem n i am feeling the effects 🥲😅 buuuuut we’re flying back home today n tomorrow so :”) im gonna be happy to be home, except i leave for roadtrip right after buuuut at least it’ll be in the states where there is iced coffee n central air conditioning. BUT I STILL LOVED ITALY SM I DONT WANT TO SOUND LIKE I WASNT SO HAPPY N GRATEFUL TO GET TO TRAVEL HERE 💗💗💗

yesss my love enjoy that freedom!! hope you’ve been indulging in hobbies that may have escaped you when busy <3 ik that’s what i used to do when i had breaks from school lol. ALSO SAME I TOOK AP STATS IN HS TOO EYYY also noooo omg that sucks but it’s ok bb!! soon enough it’ll be over n you never have to look at calculus ever again 😭 it’s so good that you’re pre studying for it tho i think that’ll really help you for sure!!

AW OMG FRIEND REUNION THATS SO SWEET i hope you two have the best time!! seeing ppl you havent seen in forever is soooo crazy but sm fun cuz it’s like wow sm has changed but sm has stayed the same too n it’s like wow. especially chidlhood friends!! have u guys kept in touch over the years or is this sort of out of the blue meet up after being apart for a while?

thaaaank youu darling i am typing this ask out while suffering from a mild tummy ache so tysm for the sweet words that have distracfed me temporarily from the pain 🤣 much love from me!!

- ellie 💕

[dreambook06]



Dream from: May 25, 2017

on march 3 i had the most bizarre dream involving our old house. i kept putting off writing it down because i was too “lazy” so i forgot most of it by now but i still retain fragments and will now try to write them down… it gets bad weird so probably dont read this lol

so it was kinda felt like the 2016 trip to the old neighborhood… but dreamlike and out of reality… so we were going to see if the new oowners of the house were home and we walked up the porch and a man answere dm the door? and then my mom who wasnt really like my mom yet it was idk… asked can we please come inside and look around the house? we’re the original owners from when it was first built… -something like that, but she said it really awkwardly and it was really odd like she kept pausing and stumbling on words…. like the words wouldnt come out so i or someon

e took over and asked the man if we could come inside…. he said yes and right as soon as you went in the door it was the living room which isnt true to real life and there were like 6 people ,adults, sitting around on maroon-ish leather furniture like couches and the fireplace was still there! i think the room was a different color? and it was some kind of gathering whatever … etc etc forgettingg….. then we wanted to look aroiund the other rooms and  he was kind of showing us around etc. dont remember stuff……………….. later the dream felt different & people changed (i dont remember my family being there at all … i think they left & went to a coffee shop thing i dont f r eaking know) then the man showed me upstairs to my old bedroom OMG it was to the left up the stairs just where it always was… but… it was so different…… it was huge! and the closet was tall and narrow and only went back a little bit and inside was this detailed crazy i-spy esque display that was like a mini world with beads hanging like a curtain and little toy figures and objects everywhere and it was really small though once i stuck my head inside, only my head could fit through the opening. i stuck my head inside the closet because i wanted to see if the secret message my dad had written on the back wall right before we moved was still there… i craned my neck upwards but stuff wa in the way and i knocked stuff over and hit my head kind of hard and it felt like it really hit my head… i couldnt see the message. i puled my head out …etc. other stuff happens i dont remember…. the re is a girl in there like around age 9 idk… who is the new owner of the bedroom and she’s changed it up i think but at the same time in another half of the dream / my mind it looks the same only it’s all deteriorated with ripped up carpet and paint peeling off the wall… anyway the girl in there had lots of stuff idk if i ever saw her but she had like a stack of books and old toys and posters on the wall and on the slanted side wall & stuff idont know!!!!!! too vague… like she’d made it all roomy and it made me sad like i dont own this place anymore its not mine and never will be again…etc.etc.etc. then we were going to leave eventually but i needed to stay longer,,,, i wanted to get photos of the place(my bedroom) before i left it, possibly forever! so i had my camera but i hd to go get it? ten i came back and i had my camera and  the man said i needed to do something if i want to keep staying at the house , there is a price to getting to go upstairs and take photos as i please. he said i had to have s*x with him and i was so desperate to go back to go back to my room that i had to and i dont remember it happening in my dream but i remember the leading up to it & it felt real & i was kind of getting excited & i was half aware that it was just a fake dream at that point somehow so i didnt really care about anything that was going on because i half felt it wasn’t real anyway… anyway we were fully clothed the whole time and so it was just s*xual stuff but never physical s** . KWIM? .. at least that is what i remember i may not be remembering clearly. it was a dream. anyway then i got to freking go to the bedroom then. i took hundreds pictures of every crack and crevice of the place, even the carpet, in the bedroom, from all different angles, just in case it is gone forevr…i was getting anxious that the camera would run out of space or battery the whole time…then i think the right side of the room wall ripped open to the outside and it was like crumbling like deteriorating - the whole room falling apart… thats all i remember unless i care to access deeper into my head which gives me a headache



Dream from: May 25, 2017

on march 3 i had the most bizarre dream involving our old house. i kept putting off writing it down because i was too “lazy” so i forgot most of it by now but i still retain fragments and will now try to write them down… it gets bad weird so probably dont read this lol



Dream from: May 25, 2017

on march 3 i had the most bizarre dream involving our old house. i kept putting off writing it down because i was too “lazy” so i forgot most of it by now but i still retain fragments and will now try to write them down… it gets bad weird so probably dont read this lol

so it was kinda felt like the 2016 trip to the old neighborhood… but dreamlike and out of reality… so we were going to see if the new oowners of the house were home and we walked up the porch and a man answere dm the door? and then my mom who wasnt really like my mom yet it was idk… asked can we please come inside and look around the house? we’re the original owners from when it was first built… -something like that, but she said it really awkwardly and it was really odd like she kept pausing and stumbling on words…. like the words wouldnt come out so i or someone took over and asked the man if we could come inside…. he said yes and right as soon as you went in the door it was the living room which isnt true to real life and there were like 6 people ,adults, sitting around on maroon-ish leather furniture like couches and the fireplace was still there! i think the room was a different color? and it was some kind of gathering whatever … etc etc forgettingg….. then we wanted to look aroiund the other rooms and  he was kind of showing us around etc. dont remember stuff………………..

later the dream felt different & people changed (i dont remember my family being there at all … i think they left & went to a coffee shop thing i dont f r eaking know) then the man showed me upstairs to my old bedroom OMG it was to the left up the stairs just where it always was… but… it was so different…… it was huge! and the closet was tall and narrow and only went back a little bit and inside was this detailed crazy i-spy esque display that was like a mini world with beads hanging like a curtain and little toy figures and objects everywhere and it was really small though once i stuck my head inside, only my head could fit through the opening. i stuck my head inside the closet because i wanted to see if the secret message my dad had written on the back wall right before we moved was still there… i craned my neck upwards but stuff wa in the way and i knocked stuff over and hit my head kind of hard and it felt like it really hit my head… i couldnt see the message. i puled my head out …etc. other stuff happens i dont remember…. the re is a girl in there like around age 9 idk… who is the new owner of the bedroom and she’s changed it up i think but at the same time in another half of the dream / my mind it looks the same only it’s all deteriorated with ripped up carpet and paint peeling off the wall… anyway the girl in there had lots of stuff idk if i ever saw her but she had like a stack of books and old toys and posters on the wall and on the slanted side wall & stuff idont know!!!!!! too vague… like she’d made it all roomy and it made me sad like i dont own this place anymore its not mine and never will be again…etc.etc.etc. then we were going to leave eventually but i needed to stay longer,,,, i wanted to get photos of the place(my bedroom) before i left it, possibly forever! so i had my camera but i hd to go get it? ten i came back and i had my camera and  the man said i needed to do something if i want to keep staying at the house , there is a price to getting to go upstairs and take photos as i please. he said i had to have s*x with him and i was so desperate to go back to go back to my room that i had to and i dont remember it happening in my dream but i remember the leading up to it & it felt real & i was kind of getting excited & i was half aware that it was just a fake dream at that point somehow so i didnt really care about anything that was going on because i half felt it wasn’t real anyway… anyway we were fully clothed the whole time and so it was just s*xual stuff but never physical s** . KWIM? .. at least that is what i remember i may not be remembering clearly. it was a dream. anyway then i got to freking go to the bedroom then. i took hundreds pictures of every crack and crevice of the place, even the carpet, in the bedroom, from all different angles, just in case it is gone forevr…i was getting anxious that the camera would run out of space or battery the whole time…then i think the right side of the room wall ripped open to the outside and it was like crumbling like deteriorating - the whole room falling apart… thats all i remember unless i care to access deeper into my head which gives me a headache

(it all was way more bizarre & more things happened than i’ve written because i just write the factual things not really the feeling things because its surreal and cant be put into words because it is specific dream feelings only i know) ..

(it all was way more bizarre & more things happened than i’ve written because i just write the factual things not really the feeling things because its surreal and cant be put into words because it is specific dream feelings only i know) ..

[midnightmisadventures]

Guys i had ANOTHER australia dream

This was so crazy and soooo long

it lasted the whole night and the entirety of the dream was basically in the airport

Um.....basically our trip was planned, booked and busy. And me and the most random group, like it wasnt just friends it was high school people, it wasnt just hs people it was some family, wasnt just family it was some randos. Like the most smorgege board of squad and everyone else 

And we were staying somewhere in philly, or somewhere, that was close to the airport so we could wake up and catch our flight. But then the morning of we were at the hotel and realized omg we were kinda late, so the hotel was like 25 mins from the airport and everyone wanted ample time to be there bc.....the flight was to australia like its a big deal. 

So then something goes terribly wrong with me and i have to go all the way home to get something crucial, like my ticket, my passport my luggage. And im sobbing in chip at home like “i screwed it all up, i cant even go, is it even worth trying?? like would i even make it” and we looked at the time and they were supposed to board the plane at like 5:30 and idk we were over an hour away and in very hot water. 

And my dad was like ehhh your in trouble but you might make it, GO FAST GO NOW. 

Which is interesting because, in the last dream i was looking at the cost and it was thousands of thousands of dollars and verbatim i asked my parents “is this even worth trying to make this possible, like theres no way right? right?” expecting them to immediately say “yea theres no way” but they keep surprising me and saying basically “dont worry about that of course its possible” 

Which must just be spirit telling me to stop thinking things are impossible and limiting my mindset on what can happen and what i can do. 

Anyway, AuntyAbby was rushing me to the airport and i think now i was with another group who was trying to make it on time. And the whole dream is like us rushing around meeting different airport workers and befriending them saying “please please is there anyway you can help us make it to our flight on time” the airport was huge. So one person would help us take a secret underground shuttle, and one person would help us go super fast through a security checkpoint. Also plenty of elevators. They were usually to far away cause the building had too many floors and we always had to take the stairs. And it was that but for several hours. Like im not kidding, and we were begging people at each step to call the terminal and make sure they havent done the final boarding call. And everyone kept assuring us “you should make it”

But we were running. And on the way, in true dream fashion i kept having to leave little things behind that i wanted to bring but were too much of a hassell to carry around. Like stray things, and i kept fighting for my life to keep everything together but little momentos and sentimental things i kept having to leave behind. 

In fact, the dream illustrated this lesson all the way through the end, because at the end of the dream when we finally are being let on the plane. We were in this waiting area for a while while the plane located seats for us because it was a packed flight to australia waiting to finally get going because of us. 

I had my backpack, which my sooooo heavy and full and hurting my back to carry. My polkadot over night bag. A jacket, a purse, and my main suitcase big luggage. So you can imagine. Running around for hours trying to catch my flight, was exhausting carrying around all that baggage (in fact it was making me later *wink wink*) 

So finally when we were waiting for the door to open to the plane i was first in line ready to go, SO SO SO  happy to be finally securely on my flight to australia, after being so stressed out for hours. I could be excited about my mystery trip lol and relax and realize that everything worked out. I could almost taste the feeling of finally sitting in my plane seat. So much so that when they opened the door i rushed in. And the attendant told us there should be individual seats open in section C. I was walking in with erikka and i wanted a good seat, out of what was available. I found one in the row next to erikkas and it was an aisle seat. I was so excited cause it was a long flight and i didnt want to be squished by strangers. 

So i run in secure my seat and realize “oh shit i have my backpack, my polkadot, and my jacket but not my LUGGAGE” so i save my seat and walk back to the door because i know i mustve left it right at the entrance. But the plane was so ready to take off that they had already locked the exits and started moving. And my stomach dropped like, i was thinking i CANNOT go to australia without my stuff what the fuck no no no  no. And i told the flight attendants “please i know you have already been so patient with us and made many accommodations but i left my bag RIGHT there can you please open the door” and theyre like yikes like we started moving. There were two flight attendants helping me. The woman was convinced they could get the pilot to stop and turn around we had only gone three feet. And the man kept saying the pilot has been trying to start this trip for forever he already waited he wont turn around.

And i was SIIICCKKKKKKK 

But i get it.....leave the bags, catch the elevator. 

I’m just so confused as to why Australia

[adhesivedildos]

I got invited over by a friend I've been wanting to get closer to for a few beers. And while I miss them, i asked myself if I'd still go if we were sober and realized tonight's meant for other, restful things.

There's been so much shifting and stuff happening the last weeks i've hardly had time to write anything down. Its all felt like the longest sleep of my life, and congruently the fastest. But i'm alone tonight for the first time in a while and i got two new notebooks Im hellbent on writing in. One, without concern for trying to be cool or neat or any bullshit, and a pocket book for documenting lil places I like to explore, nooks i fancy if u will.

Yesterday I was taken to a mental health center by some friends, ( im learning the terminologies, guidance/behavioral health place?), There weren't any appointments open yet but I was assessed and referred to an emergency behavioral health hospital (picture relevant). So my friends and I fucked a burger pretty so good, went to the tea shop, and I regretfully worked a shift I was so dissociated and unstable during, I cant recall working it. But even then, I remember sitting with myself, defusing some intense anxieties i had, and made a healthy decision for myself even though it hurt. I'm proud of myself. Sometimes these little moments are etched markers of progress in my 7 lane intersection hellscape of a brain.

After that I was driven to the emergency center, phasing in and out of my walled off state. I'd started to cry whenever, in the back of that car, i was forced to face that for some reason, my friends taking me loved me. And were adamant in giving up their night to see me get help.

it was fucking wimdy. mana was a little too excited like "omg this is your indie movie moment its gonna storm" like ok girlie im suffering but ily. The front desk motherfucker treated me like a cross between a child, and a dmv clerk. I could not help laughing through most of the questions, "why are you here, uh what do you want, oh hm, you tried k wording yourself, huh, its ok buddy" then he picked up the phone and shouted "OH YEAH HEY, WE GOTT A TALL CAUCASION MALE DOWN HERE, SAYS HE FEELS NUMB. I SAID HE FEELS NUMB, hey do you have any thoughts of hurting others"

It was so fucking funny but i was also shutting down hard. I wasnt getting impatient so i just got plopped in a bright waiting room forced to fill out 22 pages of stupid bureaucratic paperwork while my head was buzzing so hard i could barely read. It was kind of nice. You're finally just there, everyone knows why youre there and theres no mask. Dont have to convince anyone youre fine cause youre not, youre crazy. It feels disrespectful to say but i kinda wish i could do inpatient right now. I know it sucks. But huge Girl Interrupted vibes. I want to be around a bunch of other people who also feel crazy and not have to pretend i don't. not have to worry about anything for a while.

But i'm set up for outpatient style treatment now. And i'm excited. I felt like death for so fucking long that i really accepted it. but now i want to be better, not without any mania driven high. just to finally exist at my own pace for once ever, to remember the little things i like to do, and not overthink doing them so hard that im paralyzed with guilt. im just gonna live, and take meds, and go to treatment, cook food, make my art and be alive whether i feel like it or not.

and not resubmit myself to a hellish "im faking it" guilt spiral as soon as i feel an ounce of being ok.