so-many-ocs · 8 months ago
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“let people be wrong about you” NO. 212 BATS 🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇
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fierceawakening · 1 year ago
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(Putting this in an ask instead of replying to the post because I get the impression people on it might not take well to someone responding with "yeah I can see that") On the post you reblogged about people making diagnoses based on their impressions: I get these are meant to be examples of bad criteria and I get why but my reaction to hearing about the "glass wall" reaction was "huh, interesting" more than offense because I've been told I come off that way but I don't think it's just other people's perceptions because it feels that way on my side too. People feel like they aren't getting through to me because they often aren't, the impression is not inaccurate. It's obviously still not good to diagnose based on vibes, but my reaction was "wait I'm supposed to be upset that people say this?" because to me it just feels like a good description of what a lot of interactions with me feel like from my side too and having descriptions of the subjectivity of an experience seems helpful to me. (Though again, I get why other people are bothered by it and I don't endorse it being a diagnosis criterion)
I’m not sure they are bad criteria. I mean the example is pretty clearly supposed to be “talk therapist doesn’t get along with client, client ends up stigmatized based on it.” Which is unquestionably bad.
But… a lot of whether human interaction is successful or not is about how it feels. I find interacting with my mom exhausting and draining because she shifts almost every conversation to talking about her, never remembers what someone else likes or why, etc. it’s really been a relief to have a therapist say, “you know, the reason you feel unsatisfied by those interactions isn’t because you’re a jerk, it’s because they’re pretty unsatisfying. Most people would feel ignored in that situation too.”
Where tumblr sometimes seems to me to take almost any description of anything like that as an attack on neurodivergent people, somehow.
And I don’t know what to do with that. I thought this behavior from someone I loved was normal, and that my own discomfort was me being selfish or aggressive. I only started to realize this wasn’t so when I started to make real friends, who I quickly noticed WANT to hear me do things like talk about Phyrexia whether or not it’s their thing.
I feel like there’s no acknowledgement at all that sometimes typical mental illness behavior actually is hurtful to others. It’s like no one is expected to protest how they’re being treated EXCEPT people with diagnosed illnesses, who are totally allowed to respond to “this is hurtful and you won’t stop doing it” with “you just don’t like my vibes man.”
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healthbodyproducts · 6 months ago
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Aizen Power Supplements: A Potent Solution for Men's Health
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qsphyxias · 3 years ago
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𝖗𝖊𝖈𝖐𝖑𝖊𝖘𝖘
if you fetishize mlm/nblm relationships, get the fuck out of here!
synopsis ; you took a reckless bullet for your ever so beloved detective/partner, and shuichi isn't too happy about it. understatement ; he was fucking devastated
warnings ; hospitals, gun violence, getting shot, inaccurate depictions of police and police negotiations, cussing, major angst, male! reader uses he/him pronouns
note ; the first one-shot of this blog, everybody dance ( the imagine isn’t based on the song, but i just thought it had the same vibe ig )
words ; 4k
⊱ ────── {⋅.𝐢𝐝𝐟𝐜 - 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐫.⋅} ────── ⊰
ring, ring.
...
ring, ring.
what's that noise?
ring, ring.
why won't it stop?
ring, rin-
"hello?" gratuity washed over your body, the feeling causing you to relax as the obnoxious noise had been replaced by the gentle tone of the one you love. suddenly you didn't feel as bitter as you did before; when you had first awoken from your slumber. "ah... yes, this is... detective shuichi saihara."
your head shifted towards the sound of shuichi's voice, eyes flickering to him and back to the small dot on the ceiling you had first caught sight of.
shuichi darted his eyes over to your turned back, hands cupping the phone as he tried to muffle the authoritative tone your shared boss had been emitting. "... but he's still recovering. no, i don't think that that's-" the anxious detective's voice grew a little louder out of panic, causing him to immediately lower it back down to a whisper as his mind reminded him that you were still sleeping — or so he thought. "just... at least give him one more day. please. i'll take all his work for that day."
you blinked, brain whirling as you tried to process the information that seemed to be dripping from shuichi's lips. who's he talking about? you groaned quietly, feeling as if an anvil and a hammer had been clanging obnoxiously at your head.
shuichi whipped his head towards you, sad eyes widening as he had caught your groan, however soft it was. "s/o?" nearly dropping the phone, he tightened his grip and spoke into the receiver again, quickly wanting to end the call so he could go check on you. "oh- um, th- thank you so much, yes- okay, thank you again." without hearing his boss's reply, he abruptly ended the call and kept in mind he would have to hear the scolding later — however, it wasn't like he really cared at all in that moment.
"sh-?" you paused, shuffling to sit up from your waxy, cotton hospital bedsheets as you finally decided to announce your consciousness. fuck, how did the rest of his name go? come on brain! he just said it!
shuichi had been repeating and reversing what he had wanted to say to you the moment he saw you shuffle up and groan, as well as what you needed to hear. his head was sure to detonate, each second that passed by brought him closer to his limit.
despite shuichi's selfish desire to hear your lips say his name again, he held his greedy urges back ; he needed to talk to you first. "no, you ...you don't have to talk. actually i... need to talk to you first." that's right, shuichi. stay calm, don't scare him, he's still recovering.
you furrowed your brows at him, feeling yourself slightly perspire at his serious tone ; he was usually a pretty calm, serious guy, so you weren't sure why you had been so nervous. this was quite common, however, talks like this happened a lot at his demand ; he believed communication was key — and since then you were always at his mercy with his sweet and honest sentiments.
however cringe-worthy they may have seemed, he never failed to make you flush from his honesty ; though the embarrassment he caused you had been nothing but unintentional, or at least...you believed it to be.
laughing nervously, you opened your mouth to say a stupid joke to lighten up the mood, but the throbbing feeling of your shoulder being detached, reattached, pulled, strained, and yanked stopped you from doing...well, practically anything. wincing, you gripped your wound instinctively.
"s/o! i- i said not to talk...!" the sudden, yet the revolting sound of his chair scraping against the floor hit your ears, but shuichi's hands cradling your face distracted you from the gross sound. "s- shuichi?" his touch acted as a brain restarted, as your pupils suddenly dilated ; memories of yesterday coming back to you and hitting you like that bullet you took for him.
that bullet you took for him...
"i- i did it out of love! just- just let me go! i can't go to jail! i just fucking can't!" with blurred and fuzzed vision, there stood the perp, a small pistol held improperly in his quivering hands as he spewed out excuses and nonsense.
"listen, it's going to be okay...! just put down the gun, and i promise, we'll try and work this out ; i'll talk to the judge about your prison time, just...trust me, okay?" right...you remember now. you could remember so vividly how beautiful he looked, even as he was practically sweating out of his fancy turtleneck, he still somehow was able to keep a calm attitude.
he was...he was such a nice guy. well, that was an understatement.
despite his amazingly calm and reserved speech, the perp remained unconvinced, yet also unsure of what he was supposed to do. that much was obvious when he kept darting his eyes all over the room indecisively picking one spot to focus on.
as you held your gun firmly and pointed in your hands, you flickered your eyes back onto the perp, despite wanting to stare at the detective for hours ; you had a job to do.
you sidestepped towards the detective that had kept his golden eyes glued onto the perp carefully, leaning your head into his side as you whispered something into his ear, "you know you can't actually do that, right?" you could see his adam's apple bob in response.
"i'll... i'll figure something out." shuichi adjusted his grip on the gun he held, eyebrows furrowed in such a breathtaking way. you could feel your knees buckle.
"what are you guys- what are you guys talking about, huh? talking about- how-how i'm such a pathetic piece of shit!? huh?!" you threw your head back to the shaking, wary man, gun tightening in your grip. "we weren't. just take his offer, it's the best thing you can do." your tone had been firmer than shuichi's, not as kind, but hey ; that was your whole dynamic.
"we really weren't." shuichi agreed, sincerity was written all over his face. a small part of you felt envious of his stare.
"stop-stop lying to me!" the perp's frantic switching of his gunpoint, seemed to halt to a stop as he directed it at shuichi ; causing an unwanted panic to rise up in the both of you, but mostly you.
"hey, you seem pretty nervous there. say, when was the last time you had any contact with drugs or alcohol?" you questioned in a condescending tone, a smug smile adorning your face and irking the already unstable man. looking back at it now, you should've kept your mouth shut. even so, shuichi's life was in danger, and if you had to risk your life for his ; well, you'd take any chance to do that.
the perp seemed to take the bait and aimed it back at your chest, lucky or unlucky for you two. "shut up!" an unreasonable relief washed over you as shuichi had been put out of danger.
shuichi looked over at you, communicating with his eyes as if he was pleading for you to stop and let him handle it instead. however, there seemed to be an itty bitty miscommunication. your ego seemed to betray you, as you started spewing out things you probably shouldn't have been saying ; all so you could impress the very nervous and quite frankly, unhappy detective.
"cocaine? heroin-?"
shuichi glared at you, mistakenly taking his eyes off the perp for once. "s/o, what are you doing?! i have this under control...!" he suddenly barked at you, breaking his composure as he had gotten a tidbit angered that you had been interfering with the negotiation.
"shut up! shut up, shut up, just shut the f-fuck up!" a gunshot rang out.
"watch out!" without thinking, you had shoved the frozen detective away from you, even if the gun had already been pointed at you ; you had no business risking his life.
jesus, you were probably the most idiotic man known to humankind.
next thing you know, you've been knocked onto the floor, head throbbing and wheezing from blood loss as shuichi has to determine whether he should chase after the perp or stay with you.
the decision had been more than easy ; he took barely one second to decide that your life was more important. dialing back-up in one hand, he crouched down to assist you with the other. taking in one shaky but deep inhale, shuichi nervously fiddled with his radio, shaky eyes glued to you. "officer down, i repeat officer down."
"the hell are you doing, saihara...!? he's going to get away!"
"i-i can't just leave! what if you- no, i-! just...just here," he handed to you a handkerchief he held in his shaky hands. "press it onto the wound, okay? please?" he wasn't going to take no for an answer, one more beat and he would've been doing it for you.
grunting, "shuichi, i'm happy you're worried about me but you're being hella stupid right now-" you cut yourself off, grunting at feeling the strain of talking.
"w- why did you do that? i had the situation under control...!" he sounded upset, that much was clear.
"he...he aimed the gun at you and i guess i panicked, i don't- i don't know, look- just go, alright? back-up's coming for me, and you know you can't let him get away." you could feel the adrenaline from getting shot wearing off, and with it, the pain getting worse. sweat formed on your brow ; it felt like the more you breathed, the more the searing pain worsened.
you knew deep down you didn't want him to go, that you were scared you could actually die within moments, yet you hated yourself for that feeling. it was extremely selfish. it wasn't fair. you could remember the way he looked at you.
"i'm not going, that's final. we're going to... we're going to wait for back-up together, okay?" it was weird to hear him use his asserting tone when talking to you, it was weird to hear him so confident with you too ; yet you couldn't ignore the strange sense of pride you held.
suddenly out of the blue, a wave of exhaustion hit you, causing your eyelids to flicker shut. you knew you weren't supposed to sleep ; especially not when you were bleeding out from your shoulder, but you told yourself, hey, one 10-minute nap couldn't hurt, right? back-up would come anyway.
before shuichi could even stop you, you're already out like a light, and causing sudden arrhythmia to shuichi's chest. "s/o! w-wake up!" with his words echoing throughout your dream-like state, your smile only seemed to widen ; he may have been screaming at you to not leave him — but his voice still kept that same, soothing tone to it. it was like a lullaby, to a man seconds away from death.
comparing his tone and reaction from the incident to now, it had certainly been different. you wondered what had changed... maybe he was mad? understatement of the year it seemed ; he was probably pissed the fuck off. you did ruin the negotiation after all, and for what?
"you don't seem very sad that i got shot ; i knew you were a pretty stoic guy but i didn't peg you as cold-hearted." you teased, to which shuichi held a neutral face, eyebrows creasing as he stared you dead in the eye. for a second you worried if he could tell you were joking.
"... i cried for days, s/o." his voice broke, and you could feel your heartbreak piece by piece as he frowned at you.
blinking in response, you didn't seem to believe him ; why would he cry over you? your head was probably just fucking with you. promptly ignoring the blood bag hanging beside you wondered if it had been the blood loss. "you- you what?"
it took you a few minutes to process what he had said, and for good reason. days? had you been asleep that long-? wait, he was crying? over you?
sometimes you forget he has emotions from how calm he is ; you swear you've only ever seen three sides of him ; anxious shuichi, serious shuichi, and calm shuichi. along with the occasional happy shuichi when you make him laugh with your shitty jokes, but that's a secret you keep between the two of you. or more like for yourself.
"i was- i mean, of course, i was devastated- you're sp- i mean- look, why did you- what made- that w- s/o, you- ah-" he stammered over his words frustratingly, hand rising to fiddle with his hair out of habit.
you watched him sympathetically. "hey, where'd mister assertive go?" you grinned, tone playful as you essayed soothing his anxiety. "...listen, it's okay, just take your time ; i'd prefer it if you did anyway, you're probably just gonna scold me, right?"
shuichi took strange comfort in your words, golden eyes staring straight at your hospital-gown covered chest as he tried calming himself down. "y-yeah...thanks." something was unsettling about how you seemed to be smiling in a situation where you nearly got yourself killed — even so, it was refreshing to see it.
he missed it. he missed you.
you had been sleeping for two days, so it would make sense that you were refreshed and well-rested enough to be back to your regular self.
whilst you had been peacefully sleeping and recovering in the nasty smelling hospital, shuichi had been in agony. those two whole days had been hell for him. crushing guilt and his anxiety attacked his head 24/7 ; even when he knew you probably weren't going to die in your sleep, 'probably' wasn't very assuring when you were shuichi saihara.
he would fret for hours and cry in the shower about whether it was his fault or not ; despite it being so obviously your fault, he couldn't help but wonder what he could've done differently. he shouldn't have been so weak, he'd tell himself. this was a normal thing that happened as a police officer, getting shot in the line of duty, it was normal. but it... it was completely different when he knew it was you who had been taking the bullet.
his eyes widened as he felt your hand clasp upon his. "don't look so guilty, shuichi. you're breaking my heart." you pouted, apologetic eyes staring at his kicked-puppy-like eyes. "sorry, i just- i know you said you...you said you panicked when the perp aimed the gun at me ; who, um, thankfully got captured by one of our back-up team." he could hear you sigh in relief, which frankly, irked him a little.
you were still worried about that? he, himself was a workaholic but not to the point where he would sigh in relief as there was a large bullet wound inside his shoulder.
"but uh, i don't...i don't think i understand why? i mean, he- he wasn't going to shoot, i had it under control—"
"i know you did, and i trust you but...i just couldn't take any chances, you know? i'm...honestly i don't really regret much." you smiled sheepishly, hands gently fiddling with his cold hand that rested on the very end of your hospital bed.
"i mean, i get to see you worried about me." you chuckled, "it's cute, i have to admit." you forgot all about your wound at this point.
his guilty expression didn't change a bit ; eyebrows only furrowing deeper down as he eyed you questionably. "you think it's...cute? you almost got yourself killed, s/o. you know you can't be that reckless. to get yourself nearly killed just because you didn't want to take the chance of me in danger...s/o, i was terrified. when you fell asleep, i thought my heart was collapsing — you shouldn't have done that for me—" his worries spilled out of his mouth like fluid, the words coming to mind easier, and quicker at the cause of your hands being a good distraction.
"saihara." you snapped him out of it, tugging his arm further towards you. "don't cry, okay? i'm okay. if it makes you feel better, i'll...try not to do that again. please, just..." you swiped your thumb at his face, flushing as he instinctually leaned into your hand.
shuichi sniffed in response, hands coming up to wipe his own face as soon as he realized he was, indeed crying. "...i'm sorry."
"i know i'm too reckless for my own good, but i just didn't want for you to get hurt. you're...you mean so much to me. more than you could ever know." you confessed, eyes averting as you tried to avoid his reaction.
"um, i don't know what i'm saying — maybe it's the painkillers? they put in the right blood type for me, righ-?" you took your hand away from his and to the back of your cold neck.
"i made sure they had the right one — but um, what did you mean by that? just earlier?" shuichi stared up at you, pouting as you only seemed to look away from his detecting stare.
you knew one look in your eyes would show everything you felt for him ; and you weren't sure if he even wanted to see that emotion. so you settled for a temporary solution.
"um, is- is that a bee outside? i like bees, though they are going instinct — haha, the human race is fucked-"
"s/o, why are you avoiding the question?" he dealt with many guilty perps, thus knowing when someone was guilty ; and that right now, had been you.
you grunted underneath his stare, sinking further down into your sheets as you sighed defeatedly. it's not like you could hide from a detective for long. "i- uh, i just meant like," your confidence seemed to deter ; and for a second shuichi almost felt bad. almost.
his job as a detective meant he wouldn't stop until he got answers ; and that applied to his daily life as well, his daily life that included so much of you.
damn him and his adorable crying. "i think i...since the gun thing, and i don't know if this will comfort you in anyway but this has been seriously e-eating at my brain and i finally know- i finally know what this feeling is. i feel kind of dumb for not knowing earlier ; i mean, was my career as a detective nothing?" you gazed at him from underneath the 'comfort' of your uncomfortable paper-thin sheets.
"getting off-track, i just meant that i-i think that i really really like you." your voice had been slightly muffled by the sheets, but shuichi heard you clearly nonetheless. he made sure he did.
"you- me? r- romantically?" he flushed bright red as you nodded in confirmation.
you hoped he was as embarrassed as you were because you felt like you would dissolve into the sheets from the pure humiliation if he wasn't. "youdon'thavetosayanything,ijustthoughti'dletyoukno-"
"n-no, that's not it! i- i like you too! i...haha, to be honest, i thought this would go differently." he chuckled, scratching his cheek awkwardly as he eyes your shoulder wound.
jerking up, you briefly ignored the searing pain in your shoulder as you leaned way too close to him for comfort, a look of pure devastation and worry on your face. "you already knew?"
he couldn't help but think your worried pout was nothing but adorable, unsuccessfully stifling a goofy smile. "no, i..." honestly he kind of did already know, but he never thought it was something possible ; thus clouding his judgment.
"i planned to confess, actually...i was planning to-to talk to you about it during one of our-"
you made an 'o' shape with your mouth, a thoughtful look in your eyes as you nodded understandingly. "-talks, of course."
huffing quietly, he sent you a worried look. "what, are they bad? communication is key, you know-" his informative, but light-hearted scolding had been cut off as you reached to tussle with his hair, erupting a hiccup out of him.
"they're not bad ; you're just...you're a real saint."
"a-ah, i wouldn't say that..." you laughed at his nervous reaction, retracting your hand to his dismay.
"that's what a saint would say." he pouted at your teasing tone, grabbing your arm gently with his hand as he kept in mind your disability.
you cut him off as he opened his mouth, seemingly about to defend himself. "don't worry too much about it ; i actually sometimes like our talks...though i spend most of my time staring at you as you talk, it's still pretty fun." oops.
"s-s/o..." he squeaked, looking at you pleadingly for a reason you hadn't been aware of yet.
"what? i didn't say anything wrong, did i?" blinking at him, you tilted your head.
"n-no, but- um." he wasn't sure how to tell you how much he wanted to kiss you right now. those talks proved to be nothing but useless as he couldn't find the words he desperately wanted to speak.
it was only then had you noticed he had leaned half his body over you, nearly climbing into the hospital bed with you. the sudden realization caused you to widen your eyes, as you awkwardly hovered your hands in the air. it was like your body had been telling you to touch him, cradle his head but you didn't know how, or where.
the awkwardness had caused a small, nervous chuckle to erupt from your throat ; prompting shuichi's worried glances. were you laughing at him?
you felt him shrink away, and out of panic, you let your heart act before your brain could. your hands cupped his face, a quiet clapping noise echoing throughout the white hospital room walls and only seeming to make everything more strange than it had been.
shuichi held a shocked expression on his face, as you had practically been melting from how much you were sweating. fuck, did i mess this up?
no words had been exchanged, both of you, too bewildered and too nervous to say or do anything — the situation grew so bizarre that it literally left them speechless. with both pairs of eyes glued onto the others, neither of you moved — no matter how sore shuichi's arms had been getting from holding himself up not to crush you, and how with each agonizing second, you weren't sure whether or not to tighten your grip on his jaw.
"a-are you going to kiss me? or just stand there?"
"i-i can do that? really?" shuichi watched you closely for confirmation ; and you swore you felt him lean in closer to you — not that you were complaining. in any way. whatsoever.
"um, y-yeah. i-i consent, ha— mmf-!" shuichi hadn't bothered to hide his eagerness, lips already pressing and moving against yours like it was instinct, like it was something he had been waiting for for years.
your fingers ultimately tightened around his jaw, and you made the move to bring him further down onto you — to which wasn't a very good choice.
"w-wah! s/o, w-wait a second!" he muffled through your lips, golden eyes revealing themselves as he lifted his eyelids in a panic as you started pulling him down to you. he was unreasonably afraid of accidentally putting you in more pain ; but the electrifying feeling you had felt from his lips on yours had had the same cause and feeling as 10 million painkillers — you felt like you were in cloud 9 with a million tiny shuichi angels swimming and flying around you.
you promptly ignored him, craving more as you used one of your arms to hug him close to you — the position probably looked like you were trying to strangle him, but your lips on his said otherwise.
you two probably spent 30 minutes making out in your assigned hospital bed, but hey, it's not like anyone was waiting.
...i mean, just ignore the nurse awkwardly standing at the doorway and you're fine.
⊱───── ❝ thank you for reading! ❞ ─────⊰
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whimsicallyreading · 4 years ago
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Eight Second Ride
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Okay, so I did a thing. This is for @charincharge​ who made me think this was a good idea and @wordsxstars​ who convinced me to post it anyways when I reconsidered. XD I hope y’all enjoy. 
CW- An inaccurate portrayal of modern cowboys. They ain’t shit y'all. XD 
The smell of hay and top soil fills the arena and Aelin can feel the anticipation of the crowd rushing through her.
So far, Bulls Night Out had been more epic than she was expecting. When Aedion had showed up at her apartment and presented her with the tickets, she wasn’t impressed. A night in a building filled with dirt, watching men attempt questionable things with animals wasn’t exactly her idea of fun.
Yet, with every near-fatal miss and the difference between victory and failure lying in the milliseconds between competitors- Aelin found she was quickly becoming invested in the bizarre sport.
Lorcan Salvaterre was the name highlighted at the top of the leader board with an impressive nine-point-one second ride. A lot of the men, she noticed, didn’t even make the minimum eight seconds before flying off their bull.
Aelin had watched in morbid fascination as a rider named Vaughn was tossed and narrowly escaped death. A hoof missing his head by a hair. His buddies had helped pull him back over the fence just as a gate at the far end of the arena opened. She watched as two men on horses roped the angry steer and guided it back towards the stalls.
When Vaughn saw the timer which now reads N/A he took off his hat and threw it on the ground, yanking on the ends of his dark hair. A couple of hands reached around to pat his shoulder consolingly.
Aelin’s attention was pulled away as Aedion squeezed his massive thighs through the tiny, crowded stadium seating. A cherry frosty in one hand and the funnel cake she requested in the other.
He set the dessert of fried batter and powdered sugar in her lap, and her heart nearly stopped in her chest. Whether it was from the sight of something so greasy, or the pure joy of the carnival snack she didn’t know.
“It’s about time,” she goads Aedion through a mouthful of dough. The sugar already coating her fingers and a layer of it dirtying her jeans. It was a mess, but so good.
Aedion’s eyes narrow at her as he sips his frosty, “It’s a mad house down there. All of the lines are like a mile long and I’m pretty sure a clown tried to grab my ass.” He snags a bite of her funnel cake and shoves it in his mouth. “I hope your snack was worth it.”
“Keeping me happy is worth it,” she smacks his wrist when his fingers try to swipe another bite.
The crowd roars and Aelin looks back down to see a rider running back towards the fence, a glinting smile on his face. On the big screen, they replay his ride and clock him at nine-seconds even, placing him in second place.
Aedion whistles appreciatively at the footage and Aelin claps when a Fenrys Moonbeam is placed just below Lorcan on the leader board.
“Damn, he’s attractive.” Aedion comments, and Aelin nods enthusiastically.
“I’m not going to lie. I was skeptical about this-“ they watch as another rider is helped onto a bull and they await the go, “but this is way more fun then I thought it was going to be.”
“It helps that all of these people are fine,” he laughs. Aedion pulls out his phone, and videos the next ride. It only lasts five seconds, but makes an excellent boomerang that he swiftly posts to his story. Followed by a selfie of them and their snacks.
Lysandra would be so mad she bailed.
“Shit,” Aedion swears as he drops his frosty and the red ice bursts across the front on his shirt. “Shit. I forgot napkins.”
“I’ll go get some,” Aelin assures, but as she battles her way through the crowd and bumps various limbs against other peoples body parts, she regrets her chivalry.
It takes five minutes alone just to get to the bottom of the stairs. Pulling herself free from the throngs of people, Aelin leans against the bars looking down, directly into the arena. She needed a moment of fresh air, not surrounded by dozens of sweaty people. Aedion could wait an extra damn minute.
But, as she peels her eyes open, they nearly bug out of her head. Directly below her she can see right into the shoot, and the bull rider who was being set up for his next ride.
His eyes are the same pine green as the forests of her homeland, and she can see the white hair coiled into a bun right before his buddy slaps a hat on his head.
He was beautiful. A work of masculine art. Muscles for days and Aelin swore she could gut glass against his cheekbones. Aedion’s napkins are long forgotten as she stares at the man situating himself onto the fidgeting bull.
Rowan Whitethorn- the name is plastered on the big screen alongside his previous states and homeland. He’s from Wendlyn, her mother’s country of origin.
When Aelin looks back down, she startled. His face is locked on hers, green eyes piercing her skin with its inquisitiveness. He’s close enough she can see his pail eyelashes droop, apparently satisfied by what he sees. Aelin forces her expression to stay neutral as his yes flitter back up her face to meet her own gaze.
Their eyes lock, neither of them blink. Aelin can feel the temperature of the building rise by several degrees and she bites her lip.
A man slaps Rowan’s shoulder, telling him the count down has started. He barely pays the person any mind though as the seconds before his ride dwindle down. Just before the horn blows, he winks at her.
Aelin’s whole face burns as the gate is released and Rowan is out of the shoot like a rocket. Her heart is thumping in her chest like a base drum and she’s about ready to lay on the floor and die.
That man. She caught that beautiful man’s attention and got into a veritable starting contest with him like a five year-old. Her horror is only exacerbated when she realizes her hands are still coated in powdered sugar and it was probably on her face as well.
So much for her image as smoldering, goddess.
A roar from the crowd rises like never before. The men above the shoots near her have their hats off and are cheering at the top of their lungs. People are stomping, clapping. Something big just happened.
A replay of Rowan’d ride is playing across several different screens. Below his name, is his time.
Twelve seconds.
Suddenly, a pair of calloused hands are gripping the rails near her face, and a heavily muscled body is pulling itself up and over the edge.
Aelin staggers back as Rowan drops onto the floor in front of her. His eyes are lit with adrenalin and sweat beads his brow, but despite the whirlwind he’d just gone through he looked strangely serene.
He marches in front of her grabs a paper from inside his pocket. It’s a crumpled paper with a bold number on one side and on the back is his name and information.
Information like his phone number.
Her mouth goes dry as he presses it into her hand. Rowan gives her a smile that sends a tingle down her spine and makes her toes curl in her shoes.
“You are good luck, doll. You should give me a call sometime.”
Aelin’s bravado catches up with her and she places a hand on her hip, meeting his gaze full on. “If I’m such good luck then you would take me out for a drink. Tonight.”
Pulling the hat from his head, Rowan combs a hand through the loose strands of silver hair cascading around his face. “I think I can manage that.”
“I’ll be in row ten, seat seven. When you are done.” She pushes the piece of paper back at hum and nods to where Aedion is sitting. He’s be pissed when he realized she would be ditching him.
“I’ll see you in about an hour,” his eyes rake over her one more time before walking away to join his jovial friends.
They clap his shoulders, he’s so tall some of them have to jump to rustle the top of his head. All of them enthused over his almost assured win, before they sweep him away and he disappears into the crowd, he looks back at her one more time.
An hour, she mouthes to him.
A half-grin graces his face and he tilts his chin as Aelin makes her way back to Aedion.
Yeah, the rodeo was definitely more exciting then she was expecting.
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velveetacrackncheese · 4 years ago
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I remember you talking about Angel a little bit ago and how you didn't think he was as bad as everybody else was saying. What makes him appeal to you, I can't really get behind him in all honesty.
So I keep getting asks regarding to clarify my stance on Angel, and while I don’t mind this despite getting asks about it even now from HH fans and non-fans alike, receiving charitable and uncharitable asks and takes simultaneously from both, I might as well answer because I’m getting a bit tired of it. Not on here that often and every time there’s a new ask regarding it and I don’t understand why people want my take on this, despite me having already given one, or the clarification. That being said, my mind has changed a bit on the subject, and I kind of wanna give a small analysis on Angel and how I feel about him now, so here we are.
 Firstly, the debate surrounding Angel Dust is off-putting to me because while I seemingly see both sentiments, I also feel as though they’re both simultaneously wrong. The positions are usually “Angel Dust represents a harmful stereotype that contributes to our marginalization and is a literal walking sex joke and nothing else.” and “Angel Dust is a hooker. A sex worker, prostitute. He’s supposed to be in hell. He’s supposed to be bad and awful. Moron” and really, I dislike both of these takes for rather similar reasons. Reason being is that I feel that it’s addressing the wrong thing here, which is the characterization of Angel, and not really what the over-arching narrative and well, show itself has to say about Angel, and I also feel that the issue here isn’t homophobia as much as it involves vilifying sex work potentially.
My issue with the first take is that obviously, we’ve barely scratched the surface with this character. I will say that the way he was introduced in the pilot was left to be desired. Not that he was offensive or meant to be a major middle finger to the gay community, but simply because we typically see big, larger, main traits of a character in a pilot. In Angel, we primarily see him embodying those things that many of the “HH hate crowd” disliked about him. Upon first introduction, he genuinely does come off as a stereotype, something that was written solely for the purpose of being “the gay” and nothing else admittedly. While said analysis is probably inaccurate, I don’t blame anyone for initially feeling that way, and coming to their own conclusions. Recognize that everybody’s opinion on Angel is all pretty much based on first impressions, because we only have so much to say about him at the moment. There isn’t even a show. It’s the pilot. Things even now can still change greatly. However, Angel in the show, being a prostitute, and a sex worker, seem very much rooted in his character primarily because many of his own personal struggles also lie in the fact that he’s someone who’s also victim to sexual assault, exploitation, which obviously has connections to his occupation. We can say that many of his actions are rooted in not only his job, and experiences, but also the mask he wears to hide his pain. I feel like to simply look at that and say “Fuck Angel Dust, he’s harmful.” is simultaneously neglecting a silent minority in the gay community that genuinely deals with the hardships of sex work in real life. You don’t see that type of humanity brought to the forefront in regards to gay sex workers in media. They’re usually there to be mocked at, and while you could say Angel comes off that way initially, additional context in the comics and Addict suggests otherwise. He’s not Alastor. He doesn’t have all these special abilities aside from being able to manifest guns and bombs, and probably shoot webs out of his anus or something. Angel is in pain, and in a situation where he feels stuck. He feels like he’s on a leash and only copes in the way he knows how, that being hedonistic actions and such. As to what the general narrative and world of Hazbin might have to say? We don’t know, and that could vary. We don’t have a conclusion as to what the world of Hazbin has to say about Angel, and whether or not he needs to be “redeemed” which is an issue I take on its own. I will get into that shortly.
I take issue with the second take for similar reasons as previously stated, but it has less to do with the analysis coming from the people who say this sort of thing, and more about what it reveals about the people saying “He’s a prostitute. He’s supposed to be in hell. He’s baaaaad.” Because it shows a type of reactionary sentiment that justifies the villainizing of sex workers, and also goes to show that they probably appreciate Angel’s character for the same reason those who despise Angel, are critical of. They find him funny potentially because in their mind, Angel is something to be mocked. Because he’s a “freak” in the sense that he’s this awful, slutty monster, seemingly missing the intentions behind writing Angel the way he is, as a way of potentially showing a sign of sympathy towards the livelihoods of real life sex workers. Instead these people probably don’t think too highly of people who work in that industry and view them as a circus act, the same way they might view Angel as the funny token gay man, and it shows that people appreciate this character for very different reasons. Not to mention, this take is not a very good defense. Does someone being in hell necessarily necessitate them to be “offensive?” A very non-offensive, non-confrontational, seemingly polite person could be the most awful person when the optics of civility are stripped away... Like a politician.
However, I end up pondering about what the narrative itself has to say about Angel needing to be redeemed. Because of the pilot’s highlight on his hypersexual manner, I end up asking myself what he needs to be redeemed from. His sex work and sexual nature certainly doesn’t make him a bad person. His violence probably does, but there’s so much emphasis on the sexual side of him and not the “gangster” side of him, and suggesting that people who are exploited by the industry they work in need to be “redeemed” almost insinuates like they’re doing something wrong. As if it potentially shares the same reactionary sentiment about sex workers that those who view Angel as a laughing stock do. Now, if “redemption” is a euphemism for “rehabilitation” then I would view this differently. However, in the pilot, the term “rehabilitation” and “redemption” are both used, seemingly interchangeably, despite both of these terms having different meanings. In terms of Hazbin, since we’re in hell, which is based on the Christian mythos (most likely also inspired by other cultural interpretations of a bad afterlife) “redemption” here is probably referring to the absolving of sins and what have you, although we don’t really know what Hazbin’s criteria for being worthy of Hell is, and said criteria is also never questioned. We just know that everybody there in hell is supposed to be bad as the latter say, and that’s that. They’re all “sinful”, all worthy of being considered bad people despite some clearly not being so... awful. Vaggie isn’t so awful. She’s a bit angry, but for a good reason. Why is she in hell with literal murderers, homophobes, gangsters, etc? Of course we don’t know much about her yet, but she seems substantially more innocent than say Alastor, who’s a literal serial killer. But according to fans, she’s in hell. So she’s bad. Bad people go to hell, and hell is where the bad people reside in, and all are in need of rehabilitation or “redemption” in order to achieve/attain heaven. (obligatory jojo reference heehee) Issue being that what’s good and bad is subjective, and despite nobody being morally perfect, they’re just in this place together with no real chance of redemption, while being told by the dominant structure and culture in hell that nobody really even wants to be “redeemed”, despite nobody wanting to be there, and probably housing some regret, only to be chained down by a culture of doubt, and many of these inhabitants probably not even really needing to be “redeemed.” There are people who are there for probably very irrational reasons, like stealing some stuff from a grocery store or something. Hell, even if someone is a murderer, what if they murdered in self-defense? Or trying to protect their family? Are they, a sinner, in need of being absolved, and to confess their sin of wanting to survive? Many “sinners” are probably people who come from unfortunate circumstances, and are forced to adapt to certain conditions that force them to do things that are considered “sinful.”
Of course, this is all very assumptive. For all we know, Hazbin could very well go into detail about this type of thing, and I’d be all for it. I feel like a lot of the former critique I’ve mentioned would be cleared away and people would be able to actually make a formed opinion on characters like Angel instead of the typical surface level takes I usually see. I’d be highly disappointed if the writers of Hazbin didn’t go down this route and question the very nature of this Heaven and Hell dichotomy and the moral code and structure presented. I have to clarify though. I’m not “behind” Angel. I acknowledge his character and how he’s written, and honestly thought the way he was shown initially was sub-par, and still believe that. My irritation revolves around fans and non-fans alike thinking they have a finalized idea of what Angel is, when they don’t, and then you have Youtubers making videos pretending it’s flawless while making statements about how stereotypes are apparently not harmful at all while making the assumption that every harsh criticism is a result of people wanting to ALL destroy Vivienne’s career when that’s just as reductive as saying that Viv is evil for shit she did years ago.
Aside from this, there’s still other things about Hazbin too. Vaggie even now I still can’t really see how she’s in anyway offensive or purposely off-putting. She’s angry because she has to react to a world who wants to take advantage of her, and her girlfriend. I’d be pissed too. She isn’t angry because she’s written to be the angry latina (despite Viv’s dumb tweet about “I’M A FIERY LATINA TOO WEE”). Alastor is a subject of discussion too because of the whole voodoo thing despite him passing as very, very caucasian and white, while also claims of cultural appropriation due to the certain iconography used when Alastor exhibits his power while playing into that “spooky voodoo” stereotype. I don’t have much to say on this because I’m simply not that familiar the religious practice aside from it having origins in Western Africa, and the Caribbean. Some say Alastor is biracial but that isn’t confirmed I don’t think. Some people say Hazbin is bad because of a Jeffery Dahmer joke, and saying that Katie Killjoy is proof of homophobia despite her being pointed out as an actual piece of shit with zero standards.
It’s all crazy. I look forward to what the Hazbin crew do with Hazbin, Helluva Boss, and especially Zoophobia. My mind is still open.
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kingofthewilderwest · 6 years ago
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Hey :) I want to watch more httyd but sadly I've seen all the movies, are the tv series' any good? Which one should I start with?
Oh goodness, I have a post somewhere answering this very question, but I’m too lazy to find it. TIME FOR A REWRITE! XD
I find the HTTYD television materials VERY worthwhile additions to the DreamWorks Dragons franchise. I feel like we are extremely blessed to have over a hundred episodes of a show filled with fantastic moments and memories. Personally, I always encourage people to check them out. The shows won’t be for everyone, which is alright, but I feel that the television series has a lot going for it. I love the shows myself and constantly reference some points from them in my analyses because I think they’re so critical. I’ll explain pros and cons so you can make your own choice about whether or not the shows might be your thing.
I’d say the number one highlight of the television series is the increased time with the dragon riding gang - Hiccup, Fishlegs, Ruffnut, Tuffnut, Snotlout, and Astrid. Many of these characters are secondary in the movie trilogy, having little time on screen, but the television series fleshes them out. It’s because of the show that I fell in love with Snotlout’s character and saw him in three-dimensional depth; I’d say he’s the character they handle best, going into how he hides his insecurities with machismo because he wants to impress a berating father. It’s the show for why I attach to the twins; their sibling devotion and love for one another is brought out wonderfully on screen. There’s good moments with everybody, and you’ll see everyone pair up with everybody - what’s the friendship between Astrid and Tuffnut like? Now you’ll know.
I think a decent test for whether or not you’d enjoy the character dynamics is… well… did you like the character bantering that happened in THW? If so, that had a very distinct tv series feel to it - to the point that they were even referencing ongoing television series gags like Snotlout getting his ass caught on fire.
There’s other characters to meet and engage with too! We’ve got Heather, a badass young woman who connects well with Astrid. We’ve got Gustav, an obnoxious wannabe “Snotlout” who shadows the older dragon rider. We’ve got Mala, the queen of a warrior-trained society that reveres dragons. And there’s Atali, Minden, Throk, Savage, Alvin, Dagur, Mulch, Bucket, Mildew, Krogan, Johann, Viggo, Ryker, and more!
The television series is also good for laughs. Did you ever want a musical episode where Snotlout sings about how amazing he is? Did you ever want to see an entire pile of fish dunked on Hiccup’s head? How about where Hiccup painstakingly tries to talk without using the letter s? “TOOTHLEH! PLAMA BLAT!” is a moment I’ll never stop laughing at.
I also think the best DreamWorks Dragons villains are in the television series. Alvin the Treacherous is a hoot on screen, delightfully voice acted by Mark Hamill. Dagur the Deranged has his fan base for a reason. And for me? Viggo Grimborn is my number one favorite villain from the DreamWorks side of HTTYD - a manipulative, morally gray trader who is such a keen strategist he makes Hiccup appear a foolish child.
One small last point: there’s extra depth to appreciate about the films if you go through the shows. Astrid sympathizing with Hiccup in the first film makes even more sense once you realize her family name got tarnished and she felt social ostracization herself. You see Hiccup attempting to develop his flight suit and sword, leading into HTTYD 2 material. The presence of Fireworms in the third film is a reference to a dragon species introduced in the shows. A conversation point in THW about having dealt with “their kind before” (that is, dangerous people like Grimmel) is a reference to Hiccup’s adventures with Viggo Grimborn. The underground caves that become stables in HTTYD 2 were first found in the television series, explored in DOB. Stoick and Hiccup have several conversations about leadership that lend extra feels to the tragedy in HTTYD 2. Tuffnut yakking to Hiccup ridiculously in THW brings up all the memories of weird conversations they’ve had before… there’s extra context, content, and background to appreciate when you approach the movies with knowledge of the full franchise. 
Now, the shows aren’t perfect, and it’s usually the same reasons why people don’t get engaged with the shows. Again: some fans love the shows and scream their way through episodes, some fans dislike the shows and refuse to touch them, and some fans are “meh” about the shows and get through them with liquor. It’s all dependent on the sorts of things you tend to attach to, and the things that tend to bother you.
One reason some people don’t engage is that the first episodes of the first series (Riders of Berk) can feel childish in tone with low stakes. It is to note that the adventures and stakes do grow from the start. The animation levels also drastically improve from start to end… it’s a wild difference to compare the first episode of Riders of Berk with the finale of Race to the Edge.
Another reason is that the shows are not about the dragon characters. There will be the introduction of many cool dragon species like the Death Song, Scauldron, or Thunderdrum, but the shows aren’t about the humans connecting with their dragon friends. They do not focus on the dragon characters. So don’t go here for Hiccup and Toothless dynamics. There’s a few feelsy moments to talk about, but not many; Toothless is mostly a background character as the stories focus on the humans instead.
Next, some people feel like the characters are “dumbed down” or written inconsistently, and while I wouldn’t phrase it exactly like that, there’s a point to be made there. Some audience members especially don’t like how Hiccstrid gets handled in the first half of RTTE, where they feel like the bumbling hesitant startings of romance is inaccurate to how the two would develop relationally. (It’s to note that another group of people fawn over the Hiccstrid dynamics). Others hate Heather, calling her a “Mary Sue” (a term I think should be retired from existence because it’s a pointless criticism word anymore, but anyway, some people feel like Heather is an Angst Child who takes too much screen time, and that’s a fair point too). Astrid sometimes feels too damsel-in-distress-y for me. As far as Hiccup? Well. Hiccup’s personality is presented a bit differently than you usually see in the movies. RTTE!Hiccup is some of my favorite Hiccup, but he is presented with a different flavor.
Next, some people say that the television series story is inconsistent, completely irreconcilable, with the events of the trilogy. I personally find the continuity blips minor at best, and similar to franchise blips that happen anywhere, but it’s your call, and it’s totally fine if you find the continuity irreconcilable. It’s your take! It’s your experience with the story! Things like Hiccstrid romantic development, whether or not Berk was at peace during the five year gap between HTTYD and HTTYD 2, whether or not Hiccup knew anything about Bewilderbeasts, and whether or not Hiccup had run into other dragon riders before Valka… well… the television series will present something different than you might have presumed from movie material alone. This HIGHLY irritates some people, as it can feel like it sabotages the efficacy of certain moments in the films. For other people like me, it’s an entire non-issue. All is all fair because we engage with media in different ways! Here’s the issue just so you know: you can make your call about whether or not continuity questions will bother you.
Last, the plot. The first two television series, the plot is straightforward and fine. For RTTE, the plot is not the best presented. I think the first two seasons start out GREAT, but then it gets increasing issues. It’s for this reason that some people like ROB and DOB but aren’t engaged with RTTE. There’s a lot of fun to be had in it, and there’s many points at which I was fully engaged. In many ways, RTTE does some things BEST of the whole series. BUT. It doesn’t take much observation to realize there are logic gaps, motivation questions, convoluted but repetitive plot twists, some eyebrow-raising unrealistic moments, and instead of showing smooth characterization, people have a tendency to suddenly jump forward or shift in spurts. If you’re someone who gets invested in a show primarily for long-term plot arcs, you might get irritated at decisions in RTTE. But if you’re someone who’s willing to go along for the ride and just have fun and take it for what it is, RTTE has an entertaining story with lots of adventure.
For me? The television series is a blessing and COMPLETELY worth the watch. But I hope this discussion of pros and cons can make your decision best for you!
So! With all that said! What order should you watch them in? The order that they were released:
Riders of Berk
Defenders of Berk
Race to the Edge
Riders and Defenders of Berk are not on Netflix and you’ll have to go elsewhere to watch them. Race to the Edge got released on Netflix and is still available there… though all the shows have been released on DVD by this point.
I highly encourage you to watch the shows start to end as they came out because of plot reasons. RTTE especially needs to be watched in episode order, but RTTE makes sense only in the context of you seeing ROB and DOB first. There are filler episodes, but there are overarching plots. If you went straight into Race to the Edge first, you’d have no idea who the Helheim Heather and Dagur are, and why it’s important to run into them. 
I hope this helps you and any others considering the shows! It’s so much more dragons dragons dragons dragons dragons and I hope that, if you watch, you have just as much of a blast as I did!
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funkymbtifiction · 6 years ago
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[answered asks for the week]
INSIDE:
Hy! Can you pls give more examples how the types looks like as a child?
Is this related to a loop or inferior function?
When Enneagram 1 goes to 4, would that look like sensitivity to criticism, moodiness, brooding?
Could you compare enfp 4w3 and 4w5 ( both) so/sp?
i’m 90% sure that i’m an ISTJ, but sometimes i don’t feel that way.
Recently you said it might be difficult to determine enneagram type before mid thirties.
I haven’t been able to find any information on 1w2 ENFJ.
when we are teenagers we are developing our least favourite function right?
Hi. I was hoping you can help me. I figured out a pattern of mine that I would imagine is probably either a loop or my inferior function, because it is me when I am at my lowest point and am most unlike myself. I know what makes me fall into this pattern, now that I am older. However, whenever I fall into this pattern I have a hard time pinpointing what functions might be responsible for it. 
I am usually an optimistic person. I am usually upbeat and can always turn a negative situation into a positive one by finding something positive about that particular situation, or something upcoming that I am really excited about. When someone is sad about a situation, I can explain why it’s not so bad and then get them to think optimistically. It is what makes me charming, bubbly and an overall good presence. It is rare when I fall into a slump, but when I do this optimism disappears completely. I get extremely negative minded. Like this morning, one of my closest friends told me “Why are you being so pessimistic?” And I know why. It is always the same story…
I really like having a simple lifestyle. By that, I do not mean I do not care about good food, company, and good stimuli to keep me excited. I am all about aesthetics. But what I mean is I rather make a modest living than work long hours, wasting life. I like to work minimal hours so I can enjoy this short life we have been given. I don’t like to take life seriously. I like to just live in the moment, day by day, and absorb the present. Every hour at its rawest form. But when my boss gives me ridiculous hours or I feel this time is taken away from me by obligations like even funerals or upcoming prayer events, I begin to flip out. It’s rare because I purposely chose a job that prioritizes hours for friends, family, and fun instead of work. But obligations happen and when they happen I can’t enjoy the moment anymore. I keep thinking of that obligation and how
But when I see these dates where I won’t have time for any of that sporadically appear in my calendar… every task becomes so tedious. I feel like every chore inside my house or outside of my house is ridiculous, including something so simple like vacuuming and I cannot live in the present like I want to. I keep living in that moment where I have to do this chore. I have to do this obligations. And then I get lost and everyone around me senses something different. They get pissed at me because I’m so damn negative.
I feel like if I can understand the functions responsible maybe I can direct myself to changing this pattern. Again. It’s so rare but when it happens, it’s really bad.
The bolded is high Se. You’re an SFP. Given your obvious Enneagram 7 core type (the need to be free of obligation and able to do whatever you want / live in the moment and be spontaneous – feeling trapped when too much closes in on you) I’m guessing you’re an ESFP, and these “I feel trapped and no longer able to enjoy the moment” days are Ni-gripping (unable to think in the present, just ahead to things you are not looking forward to).
You can counter this by one of two ways, or both:
1) Doing something at the end of the day that brings you back into Se. Something aesthetic that returns you to THE PRESENT. It might be Yoga. It might be a back rub. It might be laying in the tub for two hours and reading a book by candlelight. Something sensory. Something NOW.
2) Have something to look forward to on the other side of your obligations, so you are not thinking about the days you have to do things, but that fun thing you get to do on the weekend. It may be something you planned, or the decision to live in the moment on that day and be impulsive all day long. But 7′s need fun things to look forward to, when they have a lot of “commitment”-related things sucking up their energy. So, look ahead in a positive way and not just a negative one. :)
When enneagram one goes to four would that look like sensitivity to criticism, moodiness, brooding? I know a few people like that who are normally pretty immune to taking things to personally but at times can seem quite sensitive. They also have the best sense of humor and are playful at their best. Thanks
Yes.
The important thing to remember with disintegration is that the person has all the negative attributes of the number they are moving into, but none of the positive ones. So a 1 moving to 4 is melodramatic, woe is me, nobody understands me, nobody appreciates me, I’m all alone and unloved, nobody loves me, fuss, fuss, fuss… with none of 4′s authenticity, seek for deep internal meaning, or ability to understand and process intense emotions on a deep level.
Moving into integration would also mean taking on the positive attributes of 7 without the negative ones – so the 1 would become more happy, playful, and optimistic, seeing the best in people instead of what needs fixed.
Could you compare enfp 4w3 and 4w5 ( both) so/sp?
Ignore your MBTI type and just focus on what 3 and 5 bring to the 4, and how that would change it.
3 is extroverted, wants to win, has confidence in their look, is centered around success.
5 is introverted, fearful of getting things wrong by acting too prematurely, protects self by falling into knowledge, tends to fantasize.
4w3 therefore is more outgoing, flamboyant, bigger with their feelings, more dramatic, and yet cares more how people see them because of the 3. They often are fashionable and image-conscious – because the “is this authentic to me” 4 is being pulled at by the “but do I make an amazing impression” 3 wing.
4w5 is more introverted and more inclined to intellectualize their feelings, more secretive about everything (because 5 is a little fearful of how you may use things against it if you know too much), doesn’t care nearly as much how other people respond to them in terms of their overall presentation.
Since 3 is optimistic and ‘can’ do, it makes for a lighter, more colorful 4 – optimistic about the future and able to carve a niche out or trend-set. 5 brings a level of internal focus to a 4 and often becomes ‘dramatic’ or ‘withdrawn’ – there’s more of an emphasis on morbidity whenever a 5 is involved.
hi! i was wondering if you could help me with my type. i’m 90% sure that i’m an ISTJ, but sometimes i don’t feel that way. i feel that ISTJs are often depicted as cold or unfeeling, but i am definitely a kind person - generally to everyone, and especially to those i love. i can get into a “Te mode” but it isn’t constant. but i’m definitely not Fe, and i make decisions based on logic. and of course mbti can’t show my entire personality, so could enneagram could provide clarification? thanks!
My father once told me that you can’t take everything at face value, you have to look at where someone is coming from. So, if there are somewhat cold and inaccurate depictions of ISTJs in fiction, what does that tell you about the writer? They are not an ISTJ. Most likely they are an IXFP or a high Fe user, who does not understand how TeFi works, so they wind up with a stereotype of what their own low Te would be like higher in the stack (inaccurate, because healthy high Te is instinctively professional and knows how to work with people) or they think about people they have clashed with and use them for inspiration.
That aside, most ISTJs are not cold or unfeeling. They care very deeply – they just do not waltz around with their feelings on full display and feel no need to draw excessive attention to them. They show their love through Te ways – often doing kind things for others rather than gushing. Any type can be kind and I know a fair few thinkers in general who are kind, gentle, and accommodating. But their brains still process information through their specific cognitive stack, making them thinkers.
It is possible that you have a compliant Enneagram tritype, yes. A 9 or a 2 or a 6 or all three would make you a much softer and warmer ISTJ than an ISTJ with a “cold” Enneagram tritype.
Recently you said it might be difficult to determine enneagram type before mid thirties. I am curious how long we take to develop a type of that’s how it works. I could see a type 9 develop when their efforts to deal with issues are blown off. Over time they may avoid conflict? Is that possible?
It’s not that as a child, you lack an Enneagram type, but that at 35 you have enough life experience to look back on your accumulated mistakes and see what it is that you are truly afraid of or running away from. Your defense mechanisms. The younger a person is, the more arrogant they tend to be. It’s life that kicks you between the teeth and teaches you things. Like, no matter how good you are, there’s always someone better than you. Or that you can’t keep running away from your problems and expect things not to catch up to you. Or that sooner or later, you have to leave your comfort zone and get a job. Or that “perfection” does not exist. By 35, hopefully you will have gained some perspective and enough humility not to sugarcoat your flaws. That’s Richard Rohr’s reasoning – take it or leave it, it’s up to you.
There’s theories about how you develop your core type based on your parents and how you felt and what you dealt with as a child. I’m not sure whether to believe that as true or not – often, for example, the 6 profiles talk about the child growing up in an unsafe environment and an unstable home. I had a safe home, never experienced anything traumatic, and excellent parents who never fought. I never felt threatened. I just inexplicably developed 6 traits. But I could also flip it around and say that I was so dependent on my loving and generous parents that the outside world became an intimidating, dangerous place.
They say that 9′s develop in a volatile environment where they have to ignore an abusive parent in order to cope – but out of all the 9′s I know (and I know at least 5 in real life), that’s true for only one of them. One 9 I know developed in a house without much strife at all. She just decided to be in her own little world.
I suspect like all things, it’s a combination of preferred tendencies and possibly the environment. Like a little 9 child being happy and sweet and wanting to see everything with a rosy glow and then when faced with the harsh realities of life in the real world – choosing to stick with that happy, sweet place, because it’s much nicer than the cold truth. Or the little 1 child feeling better when her room is organized, like that’s something she can control in her world. Or the 2 being instinctively helpful and generous. Etc.
In short, I don’t think anybody knows where or why these things develop. There’s no actual proof Enneagram exists. It’s just a theory that we treat as the truth, because human beings want to know why people are not all the same, so they look for patterns and explanations… and this seems as valid as any other. ;)
I haven’t been able to find any information on 1w2 ENFJ. Would you be willing to explain how they might differ from the bubbly ENFJ stereotype we often hear about? Thanks!!
It’s the ESFJs (and the ESFJs mistyped as ENFPs ;) that bring a bubbliness to Fe-doms – Ni being a very straightforward, “colder” function (paired with Se) does not lend itself to Ne-ish enthusiasm. It’s more serious and driven (Obama, Neil deGrasse Tyson, etc).
That being said, an ENFJ 1w2 would develop narrow, specific idealistic beliefs about how to improve the world and set about determined to make those visions a reality. They would not shy away from conflict but be assertive in expressing their views (because the world and others need to behave themselves). Anytime you get a high Fe paired with a 1 fix, there’s often a focus on needing the outer world to get in line and agree with the FJ’s moral principles. The 2 wing lends a forgiving air and the desire to serve others, which does soften the 1 somewhat but makes them shy less away from stating their views (Fe-dom + 1) than a 1w9.
Depending on the health level and maturity of the ENFJ involved, this corrective mentality would be warm and approachable but also sure of what it wants and constantly pushing self and others toward a higher ideal (healthy) or judgmental, a perfectionist, rigid, and have completely unrealistic expectations for self and others (Ni + 1) (unhealthy).
Ok, so I have two questions but first I would like to say that I love this page and I'm really glad I found it anyways, 1) when we are teenagers we are developing our least favourite function right? So, when you type characters in movies that are teens do you use that information? And 2) (has nothing to do with the first question) I discovered my functions and that I'm in an Se-Fe loop (or Fe-Se) but I can't figure if I'm ENFJ or ESTP, do you have any tips on finding my aux? Or at least my type
Typically as a teenager you’re starting to grow into your second function, the third usually kicks in around 20 but doesn’t fully develop until later in life; your inferior function (your least favorite) takes decades to come into balance with your dominant.
I treat teens like any other character – I type them based on their motives, behavior, and blind spots. I also type kids the same way, even though technically they’re too young to type. But a good writer can be consistent enough in their writing to show a child as a complete character, complete with blind spots. (Mike in Stranger Things being a FeNi, for example, out of touch with inferior Ti.)
Which one of your functions is weaker? Which one are you using in a slapdash manner? Which one do you make the most mistakes with? Fe-doms are highly in tune with other people and their feelings at all times; they feel what others feel, they want to control the emotional environment (as judging types), and they prioritize and comprehend people’s feelings in a way no tert-Fe can even begin to emulate. Tert-Fe feels guilt sometimes for causing strife but is largely out of touch with people and their feelings, and their own feelings – which they tend to analyze rather than understand. Se-dom is much more competent in knowing the right opportunities to leap onto to make things happen or shift them in a direction that solves the immediate problem than low Se, which miscalculates, over-estimates its ability (and proves itself wrong), and makes foolish knee-jerk decisions.
A good rule of thumb is to ask yourself: when I use this function, does it make the situation BETTER / resolve the problem or cause more problems (because I handle it clumsily)?
So, lower Se = leaps into action desperate to make something happen, makes the wrong choice, causes more problems.
Lower Fe = tries to handle the emotional atmosphere, only causes greater pain / misunderstandings / founders around trying to find solid footing, leads to more hurt feelings and miscommunications.
Hy! Can you pls give more examples how the types looks like as a child? (I mean, you said they using just 1-2 function, how does this  manifest in real life?)
Already did that here. And here.
How much do you type yourself based on childhood you? How can you tell enneagram types of a child?
Overall? 10 percent. Examine it to see what still lingers in your personality and if it matches, you have a consistent pattern. But type yourself as an adult, over 18.
I recommend not Enneagram typing until you’re over 20 years old (ideally, 35). Childhood incidents may provide a basis of BEHAVIOR, but until you are old enough to consciously evaluate your motives / fears, you won’t know why you acted that way. Enneagram is all about how you react to situations (by protecting your image – heart type; by withdrawing in fear – head type; or by instant gut reactions and anger – gut type). The older you are, the more evidence you have of how you have “made mistakes” – which leads you to your E type / variants.
- ENFP Mod
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scripttorture · 6 years ago
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(1/2) I have a story I started long before finding this blog, where two characters are being tortured for info - one under threat of rape, the other under threat of dissection w/o anesthetic. The (incorrect) idea at the time had been for character #1 to hold out until they actually start to rape him, then give up a generic but accurate tip to get them to stop, in exchange for a promise that they won't harm his sister, which they give. The sister was going to hold out until right before they cut
(2/2) cut her open, then do the same thing - give a generic tip off for finding the third member of their party (who left them both behind to be tortured - a point that the torturers emphasize to her) so they won't actually follow through. The turnover time for the torturers getting the info was unfortunately very short, and I had been hoping for both prisoners to escape the situation with minimal harm. Is there a way to salvage this story as is? Or would it be best to scrap it and start over?
Idon’t think you need to scrap it but I do think some changes wouldbe necessary. And for reference, dissection without anaesthetic isusually called vivisection (if you want more information on itspractice it occurred throughout Japanese occupied territory duringWorld War 2).
You’vegot a few options here depending on what’s important to thestory.
Thesmallest change to the torture scene itself would be to have thecharacters either lie, give out garbled useless information or giveout inaccurate information. But it might be important to your storythat these people get some kind of accurate information. And ifthey’re routinely torturing people they probably don’t have muchof a chance of finding the information elsewhere.
Youcould take out the torture entirely and havethe interrogators approach the characters in a way that’s morelikely to be effective.
ButI get the impression that you feel at least the threat of torture isimportant to the story and the scenes generally. It’s your storyand you’re the best person to judge whether it’s necessary ornot. If you feel it is then I think it’s best to try and work out away to keep it.
I’veonly thought of two solutions that balance both.
Thecharacters are separated. That’s fairly standard practice and it’sthe beginning of most effective interrogations too. I think a simpleand realistic solution would be to have onecharacter go through a pretty standard, effective interrogation withone group of captors while the other is threatened.
Thisis perfectly possible. Just because there are torturers in anorganisation does not mean every one in it is a torturer. Oftenthere’s a sort of fracturing effect, a conflict betweentorturers/torture apologists and ‘by the book’ law/rule abidingmembers of the organisation.
Luckof the draw couldlandone of your characters with torturers and another with a genuineinvestigator.  
Thatlets you keep both the threat element of the story and the captorsgetting accurate information without using any torture apologiatropes. It also creates an opportunity for you to show the readersmore about the captors.
Ifthere are divisions inside this group then this would be a brilliantway to show them.
Itwould mean picking between the two threats you've come up with ratherthan applying both. If you strongly feel that one of them fits thestory better keep that one. If you feel you could write one of thesethreats better then go with that. If you’d struggle to choosebetween them, rape is certainly the more common of the two. Thatmeans it’s more likely and more plausible but it also means it maybe what audiences expect.
Itwould mean extending the time this takes place over, but that’sactually not unusual for torture situations. I think you could usethis to show how quick genuine interviews are in comparison by havingthese running more or less alongside each other.
I’dsuggest taking time to build up rapport between the genuineinvestigator and the captured character. That doesn’t necessarilymean having them in the same room for hours, just giving them spacein the narrative to have a productive conversation.
Rememberthat people do wantto talk. Not necessarily on topic and not necessarily in a way thathelps the interrogator but generally it takes far more effort to sitin silence then respond to ordinary conversation.
Andan ordinary conversation, without ‘traps’ is really all you needto get things going. Especially if the only information you reallyneed this group to have is surface level, ‘simple’ stuff.
Thingslike that can slip out in conversation without people realising it.
They’relooking for the third member of this party. It would be natural toask something like ‘So can you tell me how you met?’ and if ithappened years ago that seems like harmless information. But talkingabout things they did with this person years ago could easily help tobuild up an impression of the places they go to frequently, the kindof things they enjoy or do regularly-
Andthat can be used to help narrow down a search.
Whenit comes to saving the other character from torture here’s what I’dsuggest: have the investigator stop the torturers.
Fromthe investigator’s point of view it can go something like this: Twoprisoners have been brought in and locked up in separate places. Theinvestigator hears this soon after they’re brought in and givesinstructions to bring one to the investigator and makesurethat such-and-such (ie one of the investigator’s mates) talks tothe other one before anyone else.
Thefirst prisoner is brought to the investigator. They’re in a prettyemotionally fraught state but that can actually be used to get theconversation going.
Theinvestigator starts by confirming basic things like the character’sname and gets little bits of simple information they can put togetherlater. The investigator thinks things are going well and prettyquickly so they grab an assistant to check how their friend is doingwith the other prisoner.
Whichis when they find out the torturers have the other prisoner.
Cuerage and indignation: ‘I orderedyou not to let them have the prisoner!’
Thisresponse doesn’t have to be based on concern for the victim oranything sympathetic. It can be as simple and self-centred as ‘Iftheyget to the prisoner first then I’llnever get anything out of them! My job will be harder! And messier!And grosser! Those bastards are trying to undermine my authority!’
Theinvestigator marches off in a rage and bursts in before the torturersdo any serious damage, rescuing the second prisoner. All of this cantake something in the region of 20-30 minutes after the prisoners arebrought in.
Ifthe investigator thenbrings the threatened prisoner back to the interview room (becausethey can’t trust anyone to handle this properly or not hand theprisoner back to the torturers-) then that would effectively killtheir chance of getting any more accurate information that day.
Thecaptors end up with a similar level of accurate, useful but low levelinformation. The information didn’tcome from torture. And you get a chance to show the readers a littlebit more about the captors; both as a group and as individuals.
Letme stress again that you can have a bad guy ‘save’ othercharacters from rape and torture without them having a ‘good’motivation for it. It can be because they know torture doesn’twork, rather then any care for the potential victims. It can also bebecause they just really don’t likethe torturers as individuals and want to spite them. Or something assimple as not wanting to deal with the mess if they get the prisonersecond.
Ifthat last one doesn’t seem like much of a motivation take a momentto consider what it would be like spending hours in a small roomtrying to talk to a survivor shortly after they’ve been tortured.Imagine how powerful the smell of vomit, faeces and/or blood islikely to be in that confined space. Even a character completelywithout moral qualms could object to torture on those grounds; no onewants to deal with the mess.
Aless plausible but still possible scenario could be to play thetorture scenes as you originally planned and have both charactersrescued by a genuine investigator both they’re hurt and beforeyou’d planned on having them ‘talk’.
It’sextremely hard to get any accurate information from someone afterthey’ve been threatened like that. The effects on memory are stillvery much in play beforea victim is hurt, though the effect is less pronounced then in avictim who was physically hurt. The threats also serve to undermineany attempt at building rapport and conversation. Theyalso make captives less willing to give out information and morelikely to refuse or rebuff attempts at conversation.
Thatsaid- some investigators havehad success interviewing survivors afterthey’ve been taken away from torturers and allowed to recover.
Thecaptors are only getting a very low level of information in theoriginal scenario. So I think this could work, but it depends on howmuch characterisation and space you’re willing to give an‘investigator’. For this scenario to be plausible you’d need tohave this person interacting with the victims for a longer period,probably several days with appropriate breaks for sleep, meals and soforth.
Ifyou think the story has narrative space to show a captor spend daystrying to win the survivors’ trust and only getting a few scraps oninformation in return- then this could be an answer.
Thisis far from irredeemable. You’ve got a few options for how to takethis scenario and which is ‘best’ is going to depend on how muchtime you want to spend on this section of the story.
Ihope this helps. :)
Disclaimer
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facets-and-rainbows · 6 years ago
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Volume 11 question corner (historical restoration)
Welp, one of my posts [here] got flagged DESPITE BEING ENTIRELY TEXT but it’s a reblog from a deactivated OP asking for a translation and CANNOT BE SAVED, so I’m gonna repost it here for posterity. Enjoy this quaint ancient translation of some volume 11 extras.
December 8, 2013
todo-john-august-cat:
BEGGING FOR JAPANESE-SPEAKERS OR JAPANESE-KNOWERS
to translate at least one interesting fact from the info lists. (maybe Lightning’s class and meister type if there is it)
please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please (Q,Q)
desktop-warrior:
Here’s what I got from Google Translate, combined with my very rudimentary knowledge of Japanese grammar. Don’t quote me on this. It’ll likely be quite inaccurate.
Interesting facts for Angel: - “Joke is not through” - I’m assuming this means that others’ jokes at his expense don’t get through to him, or he takes it all in good fun. Or, HIS jokes don’t make sense to others. - “Demon sword Caliburn enslavement” - Also a tricksy one; from the wording of it, I’m assuming it means he’s ‘enslaved’ Caliburn. - Feminist. No joke. - “No mercy to those identified as enem[ies].” Duh! :D
Interesting facts for Lightning: - Cynic - “How it is called Lightning, which was quite strong enslavement familiar.” From what I gather, this means that Lightning got his nickname from a powerful familiar demon he uses. Which means he’s a Tamer, and we might get to see him in action soon, hopefully. :D - Something about either hating not showering for a week (quite long, if you ask me), or not minding that he doesn’t shower that long and he does so quite commonly. I guess that goes with his scruffy appearance. - “Weak and cleaning.” Probably means he’s slovenly, which wouldn’t surprise me.
Now, for Lightning’s Meisters: it looks like he has all five of them, not surprising for an Arc Knight, but it looks like he got one of them (Tamer) twice. Again, don’t quote me because I’m guessing here based on images of the Exorcist ranks list I found online.
And, ah, if I could ask for a teeny favour, if you can: does Godaiin also get a character profile in Volume 11? I really like his character, so would you be able to upload his profile if he has one? If he doesn’t, or if you don’t want to, that’s perfectly fine.
todo-john-august-cat:
omg, what a clever people on internets ! thank You so much
unfortunately in the 11th volume there are only two profiles, BUT Goddain appeared in characters card (idk what it’s proper name) for the first time
[broken image link, used to be a pic of that page]
(I’m not good in tumblr :( is this picture clickable and downloadable?)
desktop-warrior:
Oh, haha, there was nothing ‘clever’ about what I did! I’ve enabled my keyboard to be able to type Japanese characters. So I copied out the facts and then put them through Google Translate. I took a first-year Japanese course in university, so I understand mostly how Japanese grammar works. I looked at the results and interpreted them in the way that made the most sense to me. You can talk to anyone who knows a little more Japanese and they would’ve done a much better job than I did. :D Nonetheless, you’re welcome.
And thank YOU for uploading that character card! What I wanted to know most of all was Godaiin’s first name, which I do now.
facets-and-rainbows:
Your translations seem pretty darn accurate as far as I can tell : ) “Joke not through” means that Angel doesn’t get jokes. I had to look up フェミニスト in like three dictionaries before I was convinced that it still meant “feminist” in Japanese, but he is indeed a feminist against all expectation. “Enslave” is a strong word; maybe “employ”? “Lightning” is apparently a title given to some sort of master Tamer/Aria (I think?). I don’t know what the second “Tamer” meister is. I don’t think it’s been mentioned before. He’s bad at cleaning and bathing, like you said.
I have volume 11 here, so I guess I might as well paraphrase the fan question corner thing they’re doing. It’s got some neat little facts.
-Angel’s middle initial is A, not O. The times when it was O were typos. -Angel is half English and half French. He and Lightning are canonically multilingual (Angel claims to have dabbled in 8 languages!). They are actually literally speaking Japanese in their scenes. Not just for the reader’s convenience. We’re just gonna go with the explanation that all the foreign exorcists are good with languages because it is, in Lightning’s words, “cooler that way.” -Rin sleeps with his eyes open. A lot. It creeps Yukio right out. -The sandwich Shiemi eats in Chapter 46 is made of herbs from her garden. It was “bitter, but good for you. Probably.” -Paku is doing fine in regular school despite seeing demons all the time, thanks for asking. -You can get TO cram school with magic keys, but you have to take the long way back unless you have a key for your next destination. -Rin is the easiest character for Katou-sensei to draw. Angel is hardest because hair is hard. Lightning is also kind of hard because she’s not used to him yet. She can’t pick a favorite character because she’s spent years of her life developing and identifying with each and every one. -Mephisto is impressed that you noticed how his fingernails only look pointy when he’s not wearing gloves. But you shouldn’t worry too much about it. He’s a shapeshifter and he can do whatever he wants. -If you want to know what class everyone is in in regular school, you’re gonna have to figure it out yourself from the school festival scenes. The information is there. -As previously covered, Godaiin’s given name is Sei. He apologizes for it. -Yes, Amaimon’s face was smoking when he came out of the cuckoo clock in volume 10, just like it was when he went into the cuckoo clock in volume 4. Yes, this is because time is meaningless inside the cuckoo clock. -Caliburn, Angel’s sword, is a trans woman in the manga despite being a cis woman in the anime. It doesn’t matter to Angel whether his sword is a man or a woman. But don’t get your hopes up, Caliburn, he probably didn’t mean that in QUITE the way you think he meant it. Angel’s kind of dense. -You have to recite a demon’s Fatal Verse word for word. Unless you’re really good. Like, Lightning good. Then you can freestyle abbreviate it. -Mephisto will neither confirm nor deny that he is the Mephistopheles from Goethe’s Faust. -If you can’t see demons, can you see Rin’s tail etc? The answer is SURPRISINGLY COMPLICATED. Rin says regular people can’t see the flames. They CAN see the ears, fangs, and tail, but no one seems to mention it. They don’t notice much. Then Mephisto talks about perception and the human brain and inattentional blindness for long enough that he has to be cut off. -How’d you like the cross-dressing, guys? Rin: It was funny! Suguro: I feel like I lost a part of myself that day. I don’t want to do it again. Konekomaru: Agrees with Suguro. Shima: I thought I was really cute but not as cute as real girls lol. Yukio: It was part of the mission. -If the twins are complete opposites, how is Yukio’s cooking? Is it edible? Well, he doesn’t really cook much at all. It’s totally not because he cut himself as a child and is afraid of chopping stuff NO IT’S NOT SHUT UP RIN. -Yes, twelve-year-old fan, it is okay if your original story copies Blue Exorcist a lot. But once you become a manga author yourself, you’ll need to branch out. You’ll understand when you’re older.
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moviestorian · 5 years ago
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As someone who loves films and history, can you name some films that bugged you from a historical perspective? Not necessarily historical accuracy per se, but where you feel they way they changed history ruined the story?
Hi! :)
Ooooh I love this question! Indeed, cinema and history are my two greatest passions. I’d like to point out that I don’t expect a film to be 100% period accurate, because it’s really difficult to achieve and also the screenwriting requires some specific narrative/pacing choices for the storytelling’s sake. I think sometimes the liberties taken by the director/writer can be advantageous, but that’s rarely the case. I’m going to concentrate on the examples where it didn’t, in my personal opinion, work well and I’m gonna try to explain my choices.
In no particular order:
Pretty much anything based on Phillippa Gregory’s novels, that is: The Other Boleyn Girl, The White Queen, The White Princess, etc. Watching these are usually ultimate cringe compilations. And certainly constantly pitting women against each other to create a cheap drama is not “feminism”, despite Gregory and Emma Frost trying to convince us otherwise. Also, congratulations for making the majority of the characters not only historically inaccurate, but largely unsympathetic.
The Imitation Game. Visually and on the technical aspects of it, it’s a very good movie with amazing cast (and music!). It was the script which really bugged me. It’s not just about being largely inaccurate (I remember seeing someone doing a scene by scene analysis in terms of fact checking, and the entire movie is only about 40% historically accurate), but it’s about the scale and how they made the entire story and the people involved absolutely one dimensional. It’s oversimplified, and I feel like they made up some things just to stir drama, thus taking away most of Turing’s complexities, especially when it comes to the relationship with his team (what was it with making Hugh Alexander look like a complete asshole and a violent man? Or turning commander Denniston into a villain for no literal reason?). It doesn’t really help that Cumberbatch, who is imo a very good actor overall, was directed in such a way that he was basically Sherlock 2.0. I really love the fact that they made it look like breaking the Enigma code was basically 1)done by like 5 people; 2)an accident. Not to mention that many lines from the movie are so trite I wanna *headdesk*.
Aftermath (pol. Pokłosie) - I think the movie worked very well as a crime story for most of the time, and I’m glad the director dared to touch the sensitive topic of Jedwabne, but I have no idea what the fuck was he thinking when he was writing the scene in which one of the main characters was LITERALLY stabbed and pretty much crucified to the barn in a Polish village in 2001. Like, I get the village was fictional, but the movie was supposed to be realistic, right? Honestly, wtf.
Mary Queen of Scots - that movie was not only boring as hell, but dear filmmakers, having Mary forcing herself on her husband isn’t “empowering” or something to be praised for. The actors were wasted on such blandly written characters.
I’m sad to admit it, but I’m afraid BoRhap also applies. Inaccuracy is one thing, but I wish the script wasn’t so banal.
Knightfall. Watching this show destroyed my brain cells. Relying your storyline on a forced romance between a knight of the Templars and queen Joan, who was supposedly dead by the time the action of the show takes place, was a pretty bold choice. And oh boy, what we do NOT have in this show! We have the Holy Grail, Philip the Fair being friends with the Templars, faked virginity test, the conflict with the pope who should also be dead at this point, de Nogaret being in love with Isabella, murder plots, Philip murdering his pregnant wife during the battle (but the child somehow survived and was born)…That show was fricking wild and I hella don’t want to see season 2.
Victoria - I really liked season 1, but as the show progressed it has become very poorly written. Again, everything for the drama TM.
Aaaaand unpopular opinion alert: the last 20 minutes or so of Schindler’s List. I’m not gonna rant about the fact that there’s a serious factual error literally in the first few minutes of the film (with the subtitles explaining the outbreak of WWII) because I was eventually really invested in the plot and I adored the cinematography, but honestly? The last 20-30 minutes (sth like that)ruined the script to a huge extent. Everything we’ve seen before turned overly melodramatic - I’m talking about the scene in which Schindler starts sobbing about being ashamed  that he didn’t save more lives. I get what they were trying to do here, but to have Schindler say it out loud, in front of a few hundred people, expressively lamenting about whether or not he should’ve sold his car or even his pin in order to save more lives is so awfully straightforward and rather unsubtle exposition. Real shame, if you ask me, because I really liked the movie overall and if not for that ending I’d give it a higher rating. Everything became way too black and white, you know? I realize that probably many people will disagree, but that was my impression.
That’s all what I can think of right now. :D
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figuretealeavely · 6 years ago
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IN THE LOOP - check yourselves
I recently had the chance to go to Skate Canada International in Montreal. It was a really wonderful experience and I feel grateful to have been able to enjoy it. The event was well-organized, the volunteers were incredibly nice, and the audience was supportive and friendly. It was therefore extremely dismaying to find that one of the newest and most popular journalism sources for figure skating had such a, frankly, inaccurate, skewed, and alarming perception of the event.
Let’s look at what In the Loop’s goals are:
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When I first saw this I was really encouraged because I agree that this is what the sport needs. And I listened to a few early podcast episodes, which I thought were pretty enjoyable. However, last week, I tuned in again and found something rather uninformed in their tone about Russian skaters. 
In re: Tarasova/Morozov:
Red: Yeah. They always look like there’s skating to the formula and they don’t really care [about] anything else as long as they’re getting what they need to get the high score that..I don’t know, it’s just very formulaic there’s not a whole lot of emotion like all were saying.
Yogeeta: Hashtag skating while Russian.
...
Red: That’s how it is with most of the Russian pairs, I’ve noticed.  And sometimes even Russian Ice Dance, it’s just formulaic. It’s just there. It happens. They did really well technically, but you never really feel anything from it.
About Russians in general:
Yogeeta: Yeah. I think in general Romeo and Juliet programs - their music cut isn’t really good. I never want to hear a Romeo and Juliet voiceover that isn’t “Juliet” [Referring to Junhwan Cha’s voiceover] ever again.
Sam: Skaters out there, voiceover is for camp and very Russian programs. It’s not for you when you’re trying to be serious. It doesn’t work as well.
...
Red: I definitely liked her skating a lot more than some of the other Russian skaters I’ve seen in the past. You can tell that she really does enjoy what she does. She ended both of her performances with a huge smile, so that was really nice to see. But I still think there’s some of that in there, like what you usually see from a lot of these Russian skaters is just “We go out, we do our job, we get it done.” You know? It doesn’t feel as passionate. But I still think she did a really good job.
I was extremely shocked to read this blatantly UNEDUCATED take on pairs. Now, if someone decides that they don’t like “Russians” (whatever that means), I cannot stop you. But it is quite another thing to say that all Russians don’t show emotion, that you don't feel anything from it, and don’t enjoy what they do. Or that Russian pairs are “formulaic.” Perhaps they are not aware of the extensive, epic, and game-changing legacy of Russian pairs skaters. Or even worse, perhaps they are aware and choose to ignore it to write off the current pairs AND the entire history of the discipline in one go. Listen, if you don't know much about pairs, that’s totally fine. Not everyone likes every event. But don’t pretend to know what you’re talking about and spread this as the truth when it is clearly not steeped in any deep knowledge of the sport. Where is the “international perspective” or “in-depth historical data”?
I wish I could say things improved from there, but they did not. Again, the audience was VERY respectful at Skate Canada, did not boo anyone, cheered for all, and especially the home team skaters. By the way, for anyone who has ever attended a sporting event, this is normal behavior. I noticed I was sitting within viewing distance of the In the Loop crowd, but didn’t think much of it. But I want to emphasize this because I heard exactly what they heard in the same area of the rink. So when I read this:
Kite: I want to say I was not super impressed with some of the audience not really cheering for the non-Canadian skaters. It was something I noticed. I mean, it is an event in Canada, it’s called Skate Canada, of course you’re gonna be going all out for your home skaters. 
...
Kat: Yeah, Vanessa and Morgan got a huge standing ovation and they got a lot of cheer, and obviously, they deserved it. And also Evgenia got a lot of cheering as well, but I guess she’s been adopted into the Canadians, kind of?
Kite: Well she’s also just so well known and I think she has become a pretty beloved figure for a lot of fans post-Olympics.
Kat: Yeah, I guess so.
Kite: So yeah, it was either if you were a very well known skater, or if you were a Canadian/French skater.
Nina: I wish the well-known points would have counted towards some of the Men’s skaters.
Gina: Yeah, it was really obvious when streaming that the crowd was just so half-hearted who wasn’t either really well known or Canadian.
I was a bit irked because the audience cheered for EVERYONE. Perhaps they were more enthusiastic about the Canadians but guess what? You are in Canada. It’s not exactly shocking behavior, and I’m glad to see the home skaters got attention. A truly rude crowd is one that is salty to their own - what we should encourage is more casual fans becoming serious fans, and that starts with them cheering for a home team. It’s true that for others it may start with the fact that the skater is another nationality, but the majority of people are not this way. Just a reality check.
By the way, it is really stretch to tie everyone who got super loud cheers back to Canada, or to assume that ALL CANADIANS LOVE FRENCH PEOPLE. Excuse me, what kind of generalization is this? Certainly NOT a primer “on cross-disciplinary areas such as sociology, medicine, media, gender studies, and politics.” I was at the event with many people and none of them found the crowd half-hearted. And guess what, only one of us was Canadian (no, it is not me) (no, I am not a middle-aged Canadian white person, in fact I am none of the above).
And then this:
Gina: I am going to get banned from Canada, I’m never allowed to enter, I find Canadians so boring.
Kite: Go off!
Gina: I’m sorry! I found the performance-
Nina: I was trying to be diplomatic.
Gina: Really one-note and really dull. I think they rely, especially in their Free Program, they rely a bit too much on the music to provoke a response in the audience rather than working with the music to create something themselves.
Kat: I agree.
Gina: I just find them so dull.
Kat: A note on the music: So they skated to Pink Floyd in their Free Skate, and that is such… A lot of the Canadians, I’ve noticed, pick oldies to skate to-
Nina: So Canadian…
Kat: Yeah, they pick oldies to skate to. That elicits a response from a certain demographic.
Gina: I think I’m about 30 years too young for Canada.
On Keegan:
Nina: Oh, I’m very curious to see what his scores will look like at other locations.  
Kat: Yeah because our crowd obviously got really, really into his programs.  
Gina: I don’t understand Canadians. I will say that I was correct last time that his Short Program is much more enjoyable when I mute the music.                     
Nina: This just in, Gina doesn’t like oldies.
It is extremely unprofessional and rude to write off an ENTIRE COUNTRY based off a few figure skating performances you found uninspiring. By the way, if Pink Floyd is an “oldie” that you dislike, then what exactly is Shoma Uno’s Led Zeppelin cover SP? The bias is rather jarring and way worse than anything I hear on live tv. Which by the way, is already pretty bad, so if your goal is to encourage “critical, educated fans” with “sociology” and “politics” I’d say you are doing pretty much the exact opposite of that.
In fact, they seem to have a very poor understanding of why Canada is a country that produces a lot of skaters, whether for themselves or others. During the ice dance event they say:
Kat: The most enthusiastic crowds for sure, like most of the front row seats were pretty filled for ice dance considering it was - they were both like early evening events as well, like they started at around six or seven. It's not super late either, so a lot more people were able to attend their, you know, it's like off work hours. I guess Canadians come watch Ice Dance when that happens.
Actually, rather than Canadians all collectively deciding to watch ice dance after work, In the Loop might want to consider that Montreal is currently the global hub of Ice Dance with Gadbois, and many of their teams were at this event. And I believe there was a large contingent of affiliated skaters, families, and friends in the stands. Do your diligence.
And then, back to the Russians:
Nina: The Free Dance seemed like it was supposed to be clean, and glassy, and very elegant, but they didn't really have the tech to back it up-
Kite: No, they do, they have good tech, like their tech is fine. It was just boring, like it didn't connect to the audience.
Nina: I feel like this will make no sense but it felt like their program wanted to be very lyrical- not lyrical, but like balletic, almost? Like the vibe-
Kat: That’s very Russian.
Very Russian, is it?
Let’s remind ourselves again:
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Don’t overextend yourself before you educate yourself on what you’re actually trying to do. Please, In the Loop, moderate your tone and biases. It is very clear to me that you guys have your favorites - we all do. But there is absolutely no need to sacrifice education, information, professionalism, and your raison d’être above in order to talk about other countries’ figure skating traditions, fans, and history.
By the way, the last thing I want to do is censor anyone. If you want to say these things, by all means go ahead. But please do not try to come across as serious, objective journalists who encourage varied discussion because new fans will be influenced to follow your reasoning. It is not hard to lay out the facts and THEN present your biases as your own. There is no need to conflate the latter with the former. 
As a final note, for fans who were so disappointed with the event and the people who attended, it seems they had no qualms about taking seats that they did not pay for and openly bragging about it on social media:
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I am extremely disappointed in what was once a promising new journalism outlet losing credibility rather quickly via what appears to be unprofessional generalizations about culture, fandoms, and everything they purport to encourage discourse about. Do better, In the Loop. 
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A Note for The Fandom
Hi gang it’s ya boi Cole here to DROP KNOWLEDGE that is LIKELY GOING TO UPSET PEOPLE but it NEEDS TO BE DROPPED
It has come to my attention recently that there are some influential bloggers here in our fandom who are being influential in a way that is negative. I’ve seen a certain big blog absolutely scorning tropes that are common to our fandom. Someone who ridicules those that buy into those tropes. Someone who believes that they are on some sort of high horse because they are ‘above’ creating content that falls into a stereotype. 
Someone who is making it seem like a bad thing to create content that follows a trope. Someone who is dense enough to not realize the impact their words have on others, someone who is almost irreparably emotionally thick enough to not understand that their words can be cruel, especially to those of our number who are young. 
What kind of trope are you speaking of, oh bear person?
Lots of things that produce wonderful content! Some of the best art and fics I see are based off of
Virgil being soft
Virgil crying
People treating Virgil like an actual entity with emotions and feelings
The sides taking care of one another
Common themes like “I know Thomas plays all the sides but they are DIFFERENT PEOPLE”
Roman Sanders being extra
Logan being secretly soft
Logan having no emotions
(Insert side here) angst
(Insert side here) fluff
Ships
So much more that I cannot remember at this moment
Anything that is quintessential to our fandom really
 A large portion of the Sanders Sides fandom consists of minors, absolutely wonderful young people who are seeking to get their toes wet in the waters of creation. These are some of the most wonderful people I interact with. But the fact of the matter is that the children of this fandom (sorry to call you children kiddos but I’m aiming this at a certain older blogger who fails to realize your innocence) are impressionable. These children are just beginning to create, and they gravitate towards larger blogs to get a sense of what creation is. 
And what do these guys think when they see you, posting never endingly about how the things this fandom thinks is fun is stupid and that everyone who buys into it is stupid? How do these kids react when they see a huge person in the fandom utterly trashing the piece they were working so hard on?
They think their writing is wrong (be that due to ‘improper characterization or ‘improper’ trope usage)
They think they are stupid
They think they are useless
Some want to end their creative careers
Just because you were so insensitive, just because you were such a prick who thinks they’re so cool for hating on something that someone else likes. Just because you seem to get off by putting down people, just because you seem to center your entire blog around being the “”sane”” one when to the rest of us “”sane”” just means ‘cruel’ Just because you are set in your ways despite being told numerous times that you are hurting someone’s feelings. 
You say you are trying to mend your ways, you say that you are trying to be nicer But have you really? It’s been a year, and I still have children coming to me saying that your posts hurt them. That they feel worthless, that their content is WORTHLESS. 
If younger people are absolutely destroyed because of your content, you are undeserving of your standing and you need to fucking figure things out.
You must remember your influence, and you must check your words, for their impression may be deeper than you realize. If you find you are unable to do this, I believe I am flanked by the agreement of many others in this fandom when I say you must speak only when you have something nice to say. Hell, I’d be fucking glad to be your filter. I volunteer, even! I would love to be the person who can tell you whether or not fucking children will come into my PMs and tell me they are worthless and dumb just because they want to write a little oneshot involving Virgil crying or some shit and believe all of that because you constantly scorn them for doing that! 
And, like it or not, people can’t just unfollow you and never see your content again. How I fucking wish that was the case. I wish my young followers who come here to escape negativity can not see your bullshit. I wish I could protect them and allow them to flourish in their hobbies, but this person is everywhere. 
It’s OK to have opinions that are unpopular. It’s perfectly OK to post whatever you wish. It’s your blog, and there’s not much I can do about it. But you cannot act as though your opinions are the only, truly correct opinions in the fandom. You cannot state an opinion and say ‘oh well it’s my opinion’ and completely disregard other opinions and trounce them as completely inaccurate. Whether you realize or not, this is the impression a lot of people are getting from you. Please consider this a wake up call. Your word is NOT fandom gospel and you are extremely rude and selfish to even think otherwise. 
The rest of us big blogs know this. We understand our standing. We know we must be cautious of our words because we understand our followers are people
So why can’t you? 
This being said, you are one of us. Because of this, I know there is good in you yet. I know that in there there is someone who can understand just how hurtful they have been. I know there is someone who, despite their struggles, can find a way to use their wonderful brain to assert their thoughts in a way that is respectful of others.  
TL:DR: Your content is fucking great regardless of how people make it out to be. Follow those tropes. Write that common AU. Post about whatever you wish regardless of how big blogs think of you. 
Just because they are big it doesn’t mean they are right.
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Rey’s Parentage Reveal In The Last Jedi is OBJECTIVELY Inaccurate
So buckle up, my folks. We’re about to take a trip down Logic Lane with a few stops along the way at The Force Awakens Way, Force Vision Terrace, and Skywalker-Solo Circle.
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Where to begin?
Ah, I have it.
So, since The Last Jedi allegedly gave us an answer as to who sired young Rey and (spoilers) they’re supposed to be junk traders who sold their daughter for drinking money and then died in the sands of Jakku, a good portion of the fanbase has been up in arms, some simply dissatisfied, but some to the point of a vehement rebuke of the information, for various, very justified reasons. 
However, there is the minority of the fanbase that is satisfied with the information and moves on from it, pretending like everything is okay...which it isn’t.
Because who was said to be her parents is objectively inaccurate based on The Force Awakens, cinematic tells, and logical deductions from the current two movies in the Sequel Trilogy.
I’m not going to lie so I’m going to come right out and say it, I am emphatically Anti-The Last Jedi because of several things that are wrong, unexplained, or simply bad about the movie. Like, if I could personally strike it from canon, I would. However, I have another whole series (#the last jedi sins) you can read, if you’re interested. I am here to talk solely about how Rian’s vision for Rey’s parentage is inherently incorrect.
As has been discussed dozens of times, it was originally intended for Rey to be the daughter of of Leia and Han, in early concepts for The Force Awakens. However, so much has changed anyway, so I will not be staking anything on that debatable evidence. Instead, I will go for the more tangible evidence that we can all see.
Aside from the fact that The Force Awakens did, in fact, emphasize many, many, many parallels between Rey and Luke’s emergence in the saga, causing most fans to speculate who her father was, there is even more to talk about. You can read my extensive dissertation on that here, or just go to my blog and /tagged/rey-skywalker and see everything I have on it.
In TFA, Rey had a Force Vision of her, being held by the hand, calling out to whom we’re lead to believe are her parents, yelling at them to “Come back!” as they fly off of Jakku in a spaceship. 
Drunk junk...traders have their own, high-class spaceship? That’s fucking news to me. Like Rey, for all intents and purposes, lead a similar work life to her parents, and she had nothing...how did drunk junk traders have a spaceship? 
Apparently, they had sold their daughter for drinking money, also. 
W-why d-didn’t they sell their spaceship first? 
Now I get it, some people are turds, but...really? You sell your own daughter before you sell your ship? Your flesh and fuckin blood? 
Moreover, she was allegedly sold to Unkar Platt/Plutt for drinking money. 
But...nowhere in The Force Awakens did I ever get the impression she was a slave, which is what is implied from being “sold” to someone in exchange for money. It makes that person a slave.
Slaves, typically, aren’t allowed to go wherever they please, when they please, live wherever they want, and give what they choose to their master. The fruits of a slave’s labor are typically considered the property of the slaveowner. 
Also, slaves don’t usually sell things to their slaveowner. That’s not usually how slavery works. I mean, yeah, she’s selling it for food and supplies, but...it’s still not usually how slavery works.
For me, Rey was someone who was simply trying to survive after being abandoned. In this little settlement, she works/scavenges for food and supplies.
Also...thinking about it...if she’s a slave...doesn’t that make all the people selling stuff to Unkar Platt/Plutt slaves too? Because she was exactly like them. 
Furthermore, she could not have been a slave because when Unkar took interest in BB-8, she chose to not sell BB to him. Slaves- objectively- cannot do that. The slaveowner will take whatever their slave has, whether they like it or not. 
Unkar sent someone after her to get the droid, but that establishes Unkar has henchmen, not that she is a slave. Because she would have been obligated to agree to BB-8′s sale as soon as he was interested, if she was a slave. 
So she’s not a slave, therefore she could not have been sold for drinking money. She must have been abandoned or left there by someone.
Someone who cared about her, probably because in the Force Vision, she was wearing pauper’s clothing, but it wasn’t dirty or damaged. It was just clothing, basic clothing. Her face and hair looked clean. I’m actually watching this on repeat while writing this because I’m making sure my memory is clear and yeah, she looks in good health and hygiene. So her parents obviously did care about her. Certainly more than to sell their daughter before selling their ship for drinking money. 
Also, going back to the very beginning, her parents were allegedly junk traders. But drunks. If they were able to own and pay for the upkeep of a ship that size, they had to have been pretty well-off or at least comfortable. They would have had 
1. no need to sell their daughter to get drunk
2. been successful enough to actually have the money to do those things.
So, something is definitely amiss there. All of it is amiss from a logic and storytelling perspective. 
Additionally, it is canon that Kylo Ren does recognize her in The Force Awakens. In the novelization, there is a mention of Kylo Ren saying or thinking ‘it’s you’ when he interacts with Rey. That is completely unjustifiable if she is some nobody from Jakku. Kylo knows her. That is proof enough that Rian’s interpretation of her parentage is objectively incorrect. It directly contradicts text canon. 
Since we’re talking about Kylo anyway, let’s delve into the reveal again. I talked about it at length here, if you’re interested for a more in-depth analysis.  
When Kylo was trying to get Rey to know the “truth” about what turned him, although it makes no sense and is inconsistent with characterization and plot elements, he removed his glove, in a gesture of vulnerability and honesty when they touched hands. However, when he “validated” that her parents were nobodies, he kept his glove on and immediately pressed for her to make a decision to join him, through coercion, saying that she was nobody and has no place in this. It was clearly dishonest and manipulative, seeing as she wanted someone to “show her her place in all this”.  Also, look at the look in his eyes! There’s something else he’s not saying. (This is why Adam Driver is such an amazing actor!) He either never saw her parents or was manipulated just like Snoke manipulated Rey to believe he could be turned. 
And Leia sent Rey to acquire Luke from Ahch-To, even though she had been looking for him for fifteen years. Why her? Yeah, she’s Force-Sensitive, but so is she...but that hug in TFA? That’s more than an “I just met you, but I feel you” kind of hug. Leia buries her head in the notch of Rey’s neck, that’s a clear sign of familiarity. Most people only do that with people that they deeply, intimately know. Rey, on the other hand, keeps her chin on Leia’s shoulder, but as the hug goes longer, she moves her chin into the nook of Leia’s neck...there’s a familiarity growing inside Rey too. Leia knew, but Rey’s coming to know. This is body language and basic psychology, my guys. I’m not even reaching here. On Ahch-To, when Luke turns around, the look in Luke’s eyes is soft and haunted when he sees this girl standing before him. He already knew. 
With all of this in mind, she can’t be a nobody. Kylo wants her on his side..there must be some reason for that...especially because it is canon he recognizes her. She was never a slave and her parents couldn’t have been drunk junk traders because it fails the logic tests. And all the parallels made between her and Luke...can’t be a red herring. Why would they be there, if there was no point? It’s bad storytelling. 
In conclusion, Rian Johnson did not watch The Force Awakens, nor does he understand basic storytelling practices or logic. There is no logical precedent for her to be Rey Nobody, so she must be Rey Somebody. Even Rian admitted that they may undo what he did in VIII in IX, probably because he might have realized how much he fucked up with not making her Rey Skywalker/Solo/Kenobi. Rey’s parentage in The Last Jedi is objectively inaccurate.
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mecallsitlove · 7 years ago
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Why is SOTUS The Series the best Thai BL series ever made?
After one year, I still can’t pinpoint the reason.
Maybe because the theme has taken on a specific culture experienced by Thai college students that is happening in real life. I’m not Thai but I’m familiar with that kind of university tradition because there are some schools and groups in my country that also practice hazing. As I learned from news, it’s supposed to be controversial. It’s supposed to be humiliating and violent. It’s supposed to have strong social impact. During the first few episodes, I felt the tension and fear of being hazed but it was used in the series lightly as it moved along. Even though the series opened a discussion whether SOTUS is generally good or bad for the youth and society, the approach was more comical than actual, more informative than enlightening and more systematic than brutal. The writer has mainly used SOTUS for the purpose of having a concrete structure in the story rather than taking it as an opportunity to take a stand and come up with moral implications. Nonetheless, there was social relevance. It was an eye-opener for an outsider like me.
Maybe because the idea of infusing a boy-to-boy romance in a concept like SOTUS seemed farfetched. It is a love story between a freshman and a senior situated in hazing culture. The newcomer Kongpob was headstrong. The head hazer Arthit was vicious. Despite the knowledge of a happy ending, at the beginning I was clueless. There’s no way they will end up together based on mere impression. There were no hints on how the succession of hazing activities will ever lead to romantic scenes. A relationship blossoming in a constrictive environment was impossible. But my cluelessness led to curiosity and that made me jumped on the train.
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Maybe because the building up of their relationship was slow-paced. As I’ve observed from previous BL series, it would only take approximately five episodes for the main characters to start realizing their feelings for each other and then develop from there. It happened in Love Sick, 2 Moons and even Addicted. In SOTUS, it wasn’t the case. It was a long and winding road. Most of the time, it was all about the SOTUS system, which is a good thing because that is the main theme and the romance only comes secondary. But I was counting on the love story. I was on the edge of my seat every episode looking forward to if there will ever be a small progress. Twelve episodes gone by, there was almost nothing. It was a waiting game. But the pacing of the development of their relationship was realistic, slowly but surely. And I didn’t feel it was dragging. I knew something was worth waiting for. After witnessing everything, the feeling was just pure happiness and contentment. When everything has fallen into place, it was euphoric.
Maybe because of Kongpob, the first year student who fell in love and persevered to pursue the love of his life. If I remember correctly, the novel was written in third-person point of view. But in the course of the story, it was all about Kongpob’s perspective. He was the primary point of reference. We felt the hardships he has gone through during the initiation period. We felt his victories when he won the sports events and the Star & Moon Competition. We felt his simple joys whenever he was given a chance to interact with Arthit. He had a mission and we, as audience, were standing before him like we got his back. In the process of achieving his goal, we were with him on his emotional roller coaster - his sadness, excitement, pain, triumph, hopelessness, rapture and heartbreak. Resulting to a one-sided love was foreseeable. He was on the verge of giving up but he didn’t. He truly gave his heart, not just the gear, and it was an inspiration.
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Maybe because of the metaphors that gave much more meaning to the story. Kongpob personifying the moon and Arthit the sun - a simple symbolism that showed the protagonists’ personalities as well as their obvious contrast. The iced coffee and pink milk were not supposed to mean anything but they have embodied the peculiar traits of the two characters. It just goes to show that they have their own quirks and they were used very well to reference each other in the series. The gear symbolizing the heart had the strongest impact. Giving your gear to someone meant letting that someone to take care of your heart. For the giver, it’s a moment of vulnerability. For the receiver, it’s a moment to prove you’re worthy. The use of the gear has romanticized the plot with engineering students as main characters undergoing hazing. Originally, it’s a symbol of an engineering student’s pride. In the end, it has become a symbol of Kongpob and Arthit’s love.
Maybe because of Arthit, the quick-tempered, condescending senior, who brought the unpredictable element to the story. His actions were very uncalculated throughout. He was like a ticking bomb always about to explode without time limit. He was perceived as the villain to our hero Kongpob but for a reason. If the point of view of the story centered around Kongpob, the character development focused solely on Arthit. His profile was set up in the most unapproachable way but in the end he’s the sweetest thing. He was responsible for all of the most memorable romantic moments in the series. When it was his turn to reciprocate, everything went magical - when he was having heartfelt conversations with his close friends to discuss his confused feelings towards Kongpob, when he chased after Kongpob at the wedding, when the dreamy Rama VIII Bridge scene happened, when he surrendered to his feelings and gave his gear, when he replaced Kongpob’s old dirty string with couple bracelets, when he finally asked Kongpob for a date at the rooftop and, above all, when he declared his love at the party in front of everyone. It was Kongpob who planted the seeds but it was Arthit who made them grow. It was truly remarkable. He is indeed the sunshine of the show.
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Maybe because of Singto and Krist who brought Kongpob and Arthit to life. They were new in the business and their chemistry wasn’t obvious in the beginning. Their acting was better compared to most actors of their age but I feel like they could still dig deeper. But the interesting part is they have known each other before everything started. They studied in the same university taking up the same course where Singto was the head hazer and Krist was his junior. They have first-hand experience of how it was like to undergo the SOTUS system. Their appeal comes from the fact that there was a connection even before they’ve become popular. It worked to their advantage as if they were destined to portray the roles. They may not be the most comfortable with their acting skills yet but they were very comfortable with each other. The effect of the overall chemistry was sensational. The fans went insane and the real-life friendship has made everyone delusional. Of course, they will never end up together. I’m bursting my own bubble here. But the fact remains that Singto and Krist started their journey as actors together. Side by side from being nobody, they went through the highs and lows in the process of earning fame and success. SOTUS put them on the map and unexpectedly became the Thai BL superstars that they are right now. I’m a huge sucker to cute backstories and this is my most favorite. I will treasure it forever.
So, why is SOTUS The Series the best Thai BL series ever made?
Of course, other people will argue that it’s not. The development was prolonged, the acting was not the best, the last episode was unnecessary, the SOTUS storyline was a missed opportunity, the editing lacked consistency, the portrayal of supposedly gay characters was inaccurate, the romantic scenes needed more intimacy and the list goes on. Other people could prove to me that it’s just another Thai BL series but here I am still thinking and wanting to defend why it is the best of all time. All I know is that I got emotionally invested. It was my first time to sign up on an online Asian forum to keep myself updated. It was my first time to create a separate blog solely for a tv series. It was my first time to purchase online to collect photobooks. I dragged my friends to fly to Bangkok to see the Rama VIII bridge. I attended a fan meeting in Bangkok to see Singto and Krist in person despite the language barrier. I went to Bangkok twice this year just to drink pink milk.
After a year and all the SOTUS memories, I still can’t pinpoint the reason.
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sugasgrowl · 7 years ago
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A (probably incorrect and inaccurate) Euphoria Theory by Yours Truly
Let me say that this post is probably all incorrect and all garbage, but hey!! It’s making me use my brain, so I can’t complain. I’m so terribly sorry if this makes no sense.
To begin, I think it’s plain to see that Euphoria is a Jungkook centered video (mostly) and the majority of the plot is him thinking back to the good times when all the guys were friends as he stands on the roof and contemplates suicide. (In the HYYH notes, Jungkook talks about how he stood on the roof of a construction site and thought death was a better option. That’s not speculation.) The Notes make it known to us that once the guys stopped being friends, everything kind of went downhill for them all--Jungkook especially, I suppose. 
It looks to me like there are the flashbacks to the good times, and then there are clips that seem a little off.
How do they seem that way? I don’t get it--
Time travel.
Hear me out. It sounds crazy, but don’t put anything past Bighit Entertainment.
The time travel theory is true, which can be proven in a lot of ways. 
1! The HYYH notes. (The first note specifically.) Jin KNEW the flowers that the girl liked. Because he had been on the date with her before, and it didn’t go the way he wanted it to. He bought the smeraldo flowers because he wanted to make a better first impression. 
2! We can also see hints here and there in the LY Highlight Reels that he could travel time. For example, the vase falling over, and then the next time Jin caught it before it fell--because he knew it was going to fall. Not to mention the pile of clothes on his chair from him going back in time to fix their friendships over and over again. We also see Jin wearing that suit in mainly two different locations. Once in the car while he is driving, and once when he walks to buy the flowers and waves to the girl before she crosses the street. 
When he drives, he seems erratic and bothered, and eventually as the music picks up and the cuts get shorter and faster, he looks surprised and flinches as if to brace himself. As he waits for the girl to cross the street and watches her get hit by the car, he has a look of recognition on his face--almost as if he recognized the driver of the vehicle.
My theory is that it was Jin driving the vehicle that hit the girl, and the other version of himself that bought the flowers and was waiting for her saw that it was he was driving the car. (Easy, right?)
Why is the time travel theory of importance, you may ask?
Because Jin was going back in time to right the wrongs and tragedies that ripped the boys apart. We saw this in the LY Highlight Reels, as I just said. Bangtan was a family, and Jin didn’t want their bonds to be broken over something that he felt was just coincidental or based off of one split second mistake.
How can we be sure? 
Mostly by looking back to the HYYH Notes and Euphoria, as well as Run, Prologue, and INU. Even the solo short films. (Yes. It’s a lot. Blame BigHit lol.)
In INU, Yoongi set his motel on fire. In the notes it’s clear that his mother passed away and he did it out of anger and mourning. Whether he wanted to die or not, it doesn’t say. 
But how does Jin intervene, then?
In Euphoria, Jin looks out the window and sees the flames. He puts his hand up, and suddenly Jungkook is there pulling Yoongi from the fire. (Not to mention the strange glitches that appear on the screen as he saves him. In my opinion, that’s the fabric of time wavering from Jin returning from the past and the timeline being changed.) Jin saw the flames and didn’t react because he already went back in time and sent Jungkook to save Yoongi. He knew Yoongi would be okay. 
In Prologue, Run, and INU, we see Hoseok’s drug problem. He even mentions his reliance on pills that he didn’t need in the HYYH notes. In the original HYYH series, Hoseok and Jimin were often seen in the hospital together—both as patients. Hoseok was in the hospital for rehab. (And arguably for Munchausen Syndrome, which we see he is diagnosed with on the clipboard in the Mama short film, which could also lowkey explain his addiction to begin with if he was trying to treat an illness he thought he had.) Later, in the LY Highlight Reels and the notes, we see Hoseok starts dancing. He is also no longer in the hospital or reliant on pills.
My theory is that Jin went back in time to help him through his addiction, or even just to suggest that he get some help, so that Hoseok could help Taehyung. (Which I will discuss next!)
In INU, Taehyung kills his abusive father, and we can see him unravel over time (just look at BST Japanese version where he pulls a knife on Jin after he punched him.) Taehyung also hears Namjoon bad mouthing him while talking on the phone (in the Notes), which stirs a rage inside him that he compares to his father. The instance from BST Japanese version especially seemed to put a strain on their friendships, because after that they stopped associating.
Seeing the way that Tae murdering his father affected the whole group, Jin went back in time and made sure to send Hoseok to stop Taehyung from going through with it. (Even in Euphoria there are two contrasting scenes in regards to Tae and his father. The one where there is his father’s body and lots of blood, and the one with Hoseok. Both have signs of there having been a fight, but in the scene with Hoseok, the only real injury was Taehyung’s cut hand.)
Because Hoseok prevented Taehyung from stabbing his dad, Jin thought that he could save the group from falling apart.
Now! What about Jimin? He was in the hospital too!
Correct. As told by the Notes, Jimin was diagnosed with epilepsy and was in and out of the hospital—coincidentally around the same time Hoseok started struggling with his drug problem. 
In Euphoria, we see two conflicting scenes: One where the guys are all together at the hospital with Jimin (it looks like for his birthday), and Jimin is the only one in the hospital clothes. We also see a scene, not too much later, where Jimin is alone in the hospital. 
Personally, I don’t think that the contrasting clips of the guys together and Jimin by himself are necessarily showing ways that Jin went back in time. I think that Jin couldn’t do anything to help Jimin because Jimin’s issue was one that was within his own body and didn’t have a way to be prevented. 
What about Namjoon? He dropped off the planet.
Just like in real life, this pure bean was just along for the ride. He didn’t seem to have any real intention of hurting anyone, he just pissed Taehyung off. (He also lowkey stalked a girl bc he had a crush on her, but that’s besides the point.) The only thing I could say for him is that I think Jin went back in time to make amends with him so that there would for sure be one less person who had hard feelings. That can be seen at the end of BST Japanese version and in Euphoria.  
Okay but it worked, right? Like they’re buds now?
Not necessarily. He tries really hard to pull them back together, but what Seokjin doesn't realize is that although he is fixing some things, every time he goes back into the past to fix something, something else falls apart. Him going back in time only temporarily fixes the inevitable of them not being friends anymore. For example: Jungkook’s attempted suicide, Jungkook still getting hit by the car in the end, Jimin was still alone, Yoongi still got expelled, Tae still got mad at Namjoon. Sadly, they all ended up drifting apart regardless.
The one thing that doesn’t really have a 100% resolution for me is why exactly Jin went back in time and jumped in the water instead of Taehyung. We can clearly see him jump, and then we see the clip of Taehyung underwear rewinding, so Jin reversed it. But the reason as to why Jin did it? I’m not sure. 
Anyway! If you made it this far, thank you! You’re probably very confused! But honestly, that’s just being an Army at this point.
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