#it's all cha cha cha and poe poe poe up in here

[arabela25]

Eurovision Song Contest 2023 countdown: 36 days left!

Who The Hell Is Edgar? - Teya & Salena, Austria 🇦🇹 [x]

[piglet26]

Star Wars: The Last Jedi Rewatch Part 4

Rey "If you see Finn before I do, tell him..."

Chewie Gurgles

Rey "Yeah, perfect. Tell him that."

To anyone who thinks this is a one-sided friendship.

It was honestly very brave of Rey to go alone to the First Order. She had a lot of faith in Ben/Kylo Ren cause she really didn't have a plan except to plead with him I guess.

We might have gotten a hint of their sexual tension before but it's full pride and prejudice here. The novel goes a little bit more in depth and it's canon from Rian/Adam that Ren wanted to kiss her her.

General Holdo is a great leader but is there a reason she couldn't just communicate her plan to get Poe off her back, it seems like it could've saved some trouble. 3PO running off to not be party to a munity hahahahaha

Leia coming back in time to dip out and knock out Poe. It's a great scene between Holdo and Leia about strength and leadership.

The throne room scene is brilliant just all around. The acting, the direction, the production, the look of it all. Snoke didn't bridge their minds though not sure where that came from, writing wise. Rey be patient with our boy, Ren, you didn't have a plan and he's having to come up with one on the spot. Adam driver played Ren's neutrality perfectly.

Rey in plucky but she Lord she did not think this through. Ren, not one for patience or controlling his temper, actually locked it up this scene to save them both. I didn't see this in theaters so I'm curious what the reaction to him killing Snoke was. Bet it was wild. Then the moment when they lock eyes like "you with me?" and here is this iconic moment. Power lightsaber couple.

I keep forgetting that Finn used to be in The First Order. General Hux, Phasma and company have known him for a long time. Hence the bitch slap Hux gives Finn haha.

I'm so annoyed that once explained to Poe, he agrees it's a good plan and stops trying to interfere.

We also see Ren at his full fighting level. Novice Rey wouldn't have beaten him. He's beating several trained individuals at once. He's finally freed in a way he's longed to be by choosing Rey.

The cinematography during this film doesn't get enough credit. Like at all. You can see that this film is a labor of love.

That moment when Rey thinks he's Ben only for Kylo Ren to be like hey girl, still here. It's a great scene, can't say that enough. It does go to further illustrate that there isn't any place these two can hide from one another. It's what makes them seen though and fully connected in a way they've never been to another person. Yeah, they ain't letting this go.

The fighting over the lightsaber. Beautiful visual.

General Holdo after watching some boat blow up, moves to action and goes out like a G. Seriously she needed to do something or she was the only about to survive. The sound production, once again, is just amazing.

Finn and Phasma fight is nice and it's wonderful watching him more and more confront his problems instead of running away from them. Rose and Finn could've at least had soot covered clothing. I mean something. They look pristine here. Overlay aside this is a beautiful shot of Leia.

I just love the shot with the planes. The trail of red like blood over the white salt. In the resistance typical shitty ass equipment. At least it makes sense here why they have poor equipment.

I do love that Kylo makes a competent leader if not an emotional one. I wonder if he had a moment to enjoy finally becoming boss. It's what even his grandfather never managed to do. It's obvious that he takes no pleasure in it. He wanted Rey there with him.

hahah General Hux and Ren are just chef's kiss.

Rose crashing into Finn was stupid. Finn dying a heroic death would've been better or at least no pointless. The kiss was undeserved. Finn looked grossed out and confused. Or Rose could've died the heroic death, I don't know, but this is trash. However, people need help if they personally attack actors cause they don't like their characters.

Luke Skywalker finally shows up. I will say this moment of finally stepping up feels so deserved cause we watched him bullshit for the entire movie. It also brings it around that ultimately Luke is a symbol at this point. His job wasn't about beating the First Order or even Kylo Ren, it was about having something (someone) to believe in. Leia and Luke had such a touching scene where you can see the love between them as characters and actors.

Kylo Ren testosterone kicks in and he's gotta fight Kylo Ren Mano e Mano. It's a great character beat. Luke wouldn't, nor could he, kill his nephew no more than he could kill his father. He did a very unorthodox heroic thing very in league with his legacy, he bought them time to escape without being violent towards his kin. The moment Kylo Ren realized he's fake though ha! what a moment.

Finally Rey and Finn reunite. There's more chemistry, relief and connection in this wordless hug than in every single one of FinnRose's scenes.

Finally, the death of Luke Skywalker. It's peaceful, purposeful, heroic and full circle which is more than Han got. Staring at those two suns we're called back to his days on tattooine.

The last forcetime between is filled with so much emotion, again without a word spoken. Allowing actors to emote and not always just speak is the sign of a great writer and director. Ren looks at Rey with such confusion and longing. Rey looks at Ren with such disappointment and tough love. Also, I didn't realize Poe and Rey hadn't met yet. It's like automatic frenemies.

On the other side of the galaxy children share the story of Luke Skywalker standing up to oppression, violence and so forth.... and we conclude.

Overall, I LOVE THIS FILM. I don't give a damn about the hate I receive for loving Reylo. It's a beautiful, well written film with great character development. Do I like the handling of Luke Skywalker? No. The titty milk scene was gross and demeaning. Everything else I enjoy whole heartedly.

Now onto Rise of Skywalker? God give me strength. I remember it was a mixed bag, mostly confusing hot mess with a terrible ending.

[anyways-wonderwall]

Eurovision Special!

It's my favorite time of year, Eurovision time! Every year I make a post talking about my five favorite songs from the year and generally talk about what I thought of the whole competition.

Uhh here's the thing though, this year SUCKED. Like I have been following Eurovision for six years and there has never been a more mid year in my experience. There were literally only 5 songs I liked, which while it made writing this really easy, is terrible given I usually playlist around 10 songs each year. I don't know what was happening but the countries dropped the ball on picking entries and the jury decided that only boring songs were allowed to do well. I cannot express how disappointed I was this year. (I just realized in my last post I wrote "Eurovision is getting too good, and what comes up must come down sometime" and unfortunately I was right)

Anyways, if you haven't read my last two Eurovision posts (which you can find here and here) I give each song a score from 1-10 in four categories: singer, song, catchiness, and performance. While technically a perfect score is a 40, there are available bonus points based on whether it isn't in English, it makes me laugh really hard, embodies Eurovision, etc. Each song also gets a fun little note so I can remember what it sounded like. Listen it's really hard to keep track of 37 songs.

Without further ado, here are the only good songs in Eurovision 2023:

5. Lithuania - Stay by Monika Linkytė

Score: 28/40

Notes: chutoh aahh tootoh

Final Ranking: 11th

I was really on the fence about including this one since it didn't really grab me at first, and in all honesty its not that great or unique and I kind of wrote it off as your standard Eurovision song.

But then as the days went on, I found the chorus - ‘Čiūto Tūto’ haunting me. I have never had more fun than dancing along with the chorus and there has not been a day I haven't sung this song. I'm re-listening to it now and honestly, I'm fine never listening to it again, but it has changed my life.

4. Austria - Who the Hell is Edgar? by Teya & Salena

Score: 30/40

Notes: Poe Poe Poe Poe Poe

Final Ranking: 15th

Now this is why I listen to Eurovision. I come here for camp nonsense and this year Austria delivered. A feminist song about being possessed by Edgar Allan Poe?? Perfection. The song itself is really catchy, the singers are incredibly fun and charismatic, and the music video is just such a great time. I am really sad this song didn't place higher, especially since a lot of people were praising it. You deserved more girls!

(although edgar allan poe was actually very pro-slavery so they should be canceled /j)

3. Malta - Dance (Our Own Party) by The Busker

Score: 30/40

Notes: Perfect sax part

Final Ranking: didn't make it to the grand finale >:(

As the comment suggests, the strength of this song is the killer sax riffs (riffs multiple!! they just kept delivering!). The song as a whole is a super fun time, with a fun message and a goofy music video, once again things that I look for when I listen to Eurovision songs. Plus they're from Malta! A micronation represented by people actually from there! I feel like that alone deserves bonus points (I mean Malta only has half a million people, less than Wyoming).

2. Portugal - Ai Coração by Mimicat

Score: 38/40

Notes: Cabaret flamenco

Final Ranking: 23rd

This song reminds me a lot of Fanfare Ciocarlia in the best way. Its quick, full of brass, and makes me want to dance. It's also all in Portuguese and the live performance was absolutely mesmerizing. I don't know exactly what this genre is called, but I'm such a fan. Give me fast-paced music and some brass and I'm in love.

Finland - Cha Cha Cha by Käärijä

Score: 39/40

Notes: Why did the bridge keep going

Final Ranking: 2nd

C'mon, did you really think that I would put any other song at number one? This song hooks you from the beginning, has an aggressively European synth riff, nonsense Finnish lyrics, an inexplicable heavy metal chorus, this song is absolutely wonderful and one of the best to come from Eurovision. This song clearly stands out from all the others, and is the only one that I know of that made its way into international Tiktok. I mean if my roommate knows a Eurovision song without my involvement that means that it has some cultural power.

Unfortunately, I don't think this song is perfect. The bridge kind of ruins the momentum of the song by steering it into generic pop and for some reason they keep that overtone for the rest of the song. They were so close to committing to the bit, then they weirdly tried to make it sound normal. That aside, this is clearly the best song of this year and I am convinced that they rigged it.

I think the only songs I actually liked enough to keep listening to in my daily life are the last two, which is pretty bad for a Eurovision year. I just hope they do something good next year in stupid Sweden.

(and my least favorites this year were Georgia and Greece, really bringing down the letter "G." Luckily Germany brought a great song to make up for those two.)

[lrgcarter]

Okay, nobody cares about my opinion, but last night I sat through my first full length Eurovision. So here be my verdicts:

Best Songs

Germany's Blood and Glitter. Brilliant subversion of Nazi propaganda into a message that humanity needs to stand united and be fabulous. Can't believe they got so few points.

Croatia's Mama ŠČ. Great stuff. On any other day this might have my top spot. At least they got into column 1 of the ranking list, unlike poor Germany.

Other Songs I Noticed Were Good

Czechia's My Sister's Crown. Good stuff.

Norway's Queen of Kings. Fantastic chorus and costumes. The verses just never quite kicked into the higher gear they promised.

Spain's Eaea. The performers seemed to my musically illiterate ears to be Really Good At Singing. It's just the song they were singing didn't do much for me.

Honourable Mentions

Austria's Who the Heck is Edgar.For me, this didn't have enough Poe. The very next song was about a heart that wouldn't leave someone alone. Serbia sent the sort of person you would cast as Young Edgar Allan Poe in a steamy HBO show where he has way too much sex with his under age cousin. Austria's song was fine, but it needed something extra to rise above the other Poe themed entries.

Moldova's Soarele și Luna. A weak lead singer held back the piper and folks with scorpion hair.

Ukraine's Heart of Steel. I hear the performers found out mere minutes before show time that their home town was being bombed. Real mature, Russia. Real mature.

Belgium's Because of You. The lead singer stood on the light stage, looked up at the camera above him, and had the image of a splattering liquid shit explode beneath him. This is what I had been led to believe Eurovision was meant to be about. Full points.

Where My Tastes Are Different From Basically Everyone Elses

I hear Finland's Cha Cha Cha was popular. For personal reasons, a song about alchohol abuse is not for me. Perhaps I shouldn't have watched with translating subtitles?

All the other songs were kind of samey? Like, I get that all the performers were talanted and doing something I could never do, but none of them really stood out from the others? And even when they did make it into my list above, it was often as much because of the light shows as the music?

All of which is to say that none of these songs compared to New Zealand's 'entry'. That's still going round my head today. Let them join the contest!

[imaginatorcreates]

Cats and Corvids: Music Time

01 October 2022 — 02 October 2022

Summary: Pre-show jams and talks, and a dash of poetry.

Word Count: ~1.1k words

The instrument felt heavy yet familiar in Cat’s hands. The six tuning pegs all in a row. The six strings that ran down the fretboard and just above the pickup. It wasn’t his preferred color, but beggars couldn’t be choosers.

He plucked each string and adjusted the pegs until the notes rang true on the open strings. He ran his hand down with the nails against the strings, the sound soft but clean. He placed his other hand on the frets and strummed a few chords, then plucked a few notes. “Beautiful, aren't cha?” he hummed softly. “Too bad you ain’t mine.”

A sudden thump and temporary rise of the cushion seat the boy sat on indicated someone else had taken up residence next to him. A familiar presence leaned against his back and he leaned back. Four, deep open strings rang out in slow, almost lazy succession. He chuckled and answered back with six strings played in similar succession.

A hand slapped the body of the guitar — no, the bass — three times before the sound of a finger sliding along the strings rang out as the fourth beat and the person behind him started to play a bass line. There was a rest in between the two halves of it, where the person behind him whistled two notes.

Cat hummed the whistled notes and joined in with the often hidden yet essential guitar line. The person behind him started to hit the cushion seat with the heel of her foot to create a steady tempo, a simple one. The two continued to play their respective lines for a little until a voice started to sing.

Oh, wait. Rap.

“Laughin' gas these hazmats, fast cats

“Linin' 'em up like — ”

Cat’s guitar line slowly faded out and he twisted his body around until he could sling an arm around the person’s shoulder. The bass line stopped. He chuckled and pressed himself as close as he could while the two stradled their instruments. “You gotta teach Ash how to rap one day Raven.”

The older of the twins gave him a sideways glance, her bright blue eyes narrowing before she shook her head. “I can’t let her take away my one good vocal skill.”

“Oh come on!” He childishly pinched her cheek and laughed when she swiped at his hand. “You’re a poet and you know it — ” Raven snickered at that statement — “you play the bass, and you rap in our little sessions. You’ve got plenty of skills, so maybe let the lil’ baby of the fam learn a bit from you.”

Raven rolled her eyes and pushed the knuckles of one of her hands into the top of his head. “You’re one of two babies here.”

“And you’re one of three babies to Pluto,” he said back with a smirk. “Perspective, my dear Raven. Nevermore!”

“Gods, did you just combine Doyle and Poe into one stupid quote?” she asked, almost disgusted with him, yet a smile still wriggled onto her face. “It’s elementary, my dear Pluto. Do such again, and we’ll become three from four. You shall speak to me, nevermore.”

“Ah-ha! Poet and you definitely know it.” Cat poked Raven’s cheek and this time she didn’t push away the contact. “Say, what songs are we going to play today? I know we practiced plenty of them while we’re here, but which ones today specifically?”

“Maybe ask Pluto for that. He’s the oldest here, I’m not. I’m just the harmony.”

“We’re both the harmony when Ash sings. Don’t discount yourself. Besides,” he added as he wiggled his eyebrows playfully, “we can goof off while she sings. She can’t or else she sounds outta breath.”

Raven sighed and pushed her weight against Cat. “You always initiate that excuse, don’t cha?”

“Maybe. We gotta be unique out there after all.” He shrugged and held the guitar’s neck a bit tighter as he murmured, “Maybe we can actually have these for ourselves one day, ya know?”

The blue-eyed girl slung an arm around her younger twin’s shoulder and pulled him close. She didn’t say a thing, except the silence that followed was more comforting now. The boy leaned his head against her and slowly the grip on the guitar loosened.

The cushion seat rose again and a pair of arms snaked their way around both twins’ shoulders, then a pair of legs pressed against each of their bodies. “Is it cuddle time in the store? Are we cuddling pre-performance?” a younger, feminine voice asked.

Even without looking up, Cat knew that their resident singer and baby of the family had found the two. “Wanna join us Ash?” he asked. “Raven’s been a bit sappy today.”

She gasped and shifted her position to elbow him in his side. Hard. He groaned and hissed through his teeth. “I didn’t deserve that.”

Ash’s own elevated position wobbled and she had to readjust before she could rejoin ‘the pre-performance cuddle’. “Raven,” Ash whined, “I almost fell!”

“Talk to Mr. ‘Let’s Goof Off On Stage’ here, not me,” she huffed. “He deserved that, calling me sappy now of all times. I’ll curse you Cat.”

He gasped and pressed a hand against his chest. “You wouldn’t!”

“Raven, stop with the empty threats,” another voice commanded the eldest girl. Cat glanced behind him and saw the one and only eldest of the family. With one eye partially hidden beneath his black bangs, he still managed to give a disapproving look towards all the siblings.

Ash moved off the cushion seat and waved at him, while Raven just gave her own dismissive wave of a hand. Cat gestured for him to come closer. Ah, what a way to greet him and add to whatever message they were all sending. Pluto pressed his lips together and shook his head before he approached the trio and joined them by, of course, sitting on the cushion seat. Ash found her position and sat back down, the final product being the four siblings with their backs against each other and staying in relative silence.

Cat hummed to break the silence a little before asking, “Is our drummer and vocalist ready?” When he received affirmative responses, he let the silence ebb back over the quartet. He glanced at Raven out of the corner of his eye, then to the clock. They should be getting ready now.

Thankfully, Pluto seemed to act on that idea first because he rose and stretched before he announced, “We’re up soon. You two, get your tuning done and plugs connected.” He threw two fingers at the twins’ direction then pointed to Ash. “Drink some water and don’t strain your throat if you can. I’ll find the sticks.”

As he walked off, everyone got up and did what he asked. The eldest usually led, especially now. He provided the rhythm, the middle twins provided the harmony, and the youngest was allowed to shine with the melody.

It was show time!

[oraclekleo]

Cha Eunwoo (ASTRO) - Kinky Reading

Hello and welcome!

I’m Kleo and I’m here to present some k-pop related tarot readings to you.

Disclaimer:

I would like to state that all these readings have a purely entertainment nature and their purpose is to bring some fun into my and hopefully yours lives. I have never ever met any of the idols / actors / celebrities in my readings, I don’t know them personally. Tarot reading isn’t an exact science and I can never guarantee any of it. Most of it is my intuition mixed with fantasy. Don’t take these readings seriously and don’t base any important decisions on tarot readings only, use your common sense.

If you wish to request a tarot reading, please read the pinned post on my profile first to see the instructions on how to request. I only do readings for idols / actors / celebrities of 18 years of age or older. Requests for readings including younger people will be automatically dismissed. If you feel uncomfortable with these tarot readings, do not engage in reading my posts. Thank you for understanding.

Reading Info:

Rating: 18+

Reading Type: Single - Couple

Requested: Yes - No

Deck: E. A. Poe

Spread: Kinky Reading

Questions:

Position

Libido

Turn On

Kink

Full Name: Cha Eun Woo

Stage Name: Cha Eunwoo

Group: ASTRO

Cha Eun Woo

(Cha Eunwoo - ASTRO)

Spread: Kinky

Deck: E. A. Poe

Position - King of Wands

Oh boy! Eunwoo is a dom, alright. He can even become a bit bossy when in a bad mood and won’t tolerate his lover giving glances to other men. He’s likely to be pretty passionate and caring, too, though. He’s straightforward and will ask his lover what they like and what annoys them. He appreciates honesty, even the brutal one.

Libido - Ace of Cups

When in love, Eunwoo falls for his lover with his heart and soul and all. He’s overflowing with love and passion when with the right person and will let them know. He’s the one to nearly drown his lover in his affection. He’s a romantic and will make sure his lover finds fulfilment in his embrace.

Turn On - XVII The Star

Eunwoo is likely to feel attracted to someone with an optimistic and peaceful nature. The person might appear like dwelling above the ordinary chaos and rush, in their own realm of tranquillity and calm. It’s likely for them to be quiet and modest in the crowd, they are rarely going to burst into loud laughter but they will have that nice and soft smile lingering on their lips always.

Kink - Page of Pentacles

Eunwoo might have some kinky fantasies regarding office romance. Either he might hit on his coworkers (which could be potentially legally problematic) or he will take the opportunity to get wild in an office with his lover. If the office isn’t available, he settles down for his lover to dress up smart and professional and pretend to boss him for a bit.

Thank you for reading!

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[morethanonepage]

first lines meme

List the first lines of your last 20 stories. See if there are any patterns and choose your favorite opening line!

tagged by @aimmyarrowshigh; boy this has the potential to be embarrassing, to go back 20 stories i’ll be in 2016 again i think? let’s see (note from the future: back to january 2018, which is still -- a fair bit ago lmfao. plus the ultimate shame of TWO uncompleted WIPs on this list, oh boy).

(i’m also going to be generous about ‘opening line’ and expand it to like. i mean opening more than one sentence, but still opening line in the sense of, before the first paragraph break? if that makes sense)

1. "If I die up here," John grumbles from behind him.  "I'm gonna to haunt your arse."

ugh, cringe, but in my defense this was a prompt from an ask meme that i didn’t actually end up linking to bc i was waiting to finish the other ask prompts and then i didn’t blah blah blah anyway i did rejigger it a little to uh. fit more with john’s cadence but even then like. does it??? no.

2. The bed sags as he drops onto it. It's been months since it’s been slept on; closer to a year, actually, if he thinks about it. He tries not to.

lmfao at how many of my fics start w characters either getting into bed or waking up. also just. sleepiness is probably the biggest theme within my ~art

3. The light is warm on his face but it burns his eyes as he gropes around the room, hands sliding on smooth, cold walls. He turns away from the glare, but feels it anyway, hot across his neck, seeping into his skin. 

this is interesting (to me at least) bc it’s part of my ongoing uncertainty of how to depict dream sequences in fic -- the debate for me is always, do i want it to be immediately obvious to the reader that this is a dream/something different from the main narrative, as denoted by the italics, or do i want to like. suggest the experience of actually being in a dream, which is that sometimes you don’t immediately realize it’s a dream. 

with this fic, bc i was starting with the dream, i guess i wanted to make it obvious something was up so people wouldn’t get turned off at the kind of vague, hazy description/weirdness and keep reading till they hit the actual solid narrative?

4. “John?”

obviously this is my favorite opening line of all time. the creativity, my god!

5. “It’s not working,” Chas hears himself point out, as John scowls and tosses the amulet he’s been spinning over a dusty gas station map at the wall.

always love an in media res opening line

god i really need to finish this fic i’m so disappointed in myself, not ONCE have i ever been able to finish a WIP if i start posting it before i’m done, but i never learn!!!!

6.  A gunshot,  from behind him — from behind where he’d been — and then the thud of impact, and a scream.

another in media res start! it’s just -- part of how i write plottier stuff, i.e., by writing as little as possible like buildup and detail, so i can mostly avoid having to come up with buildup and detail, bc i’m lazy and bad at it lmfao

7. “So what did you think?” Poe said, over his shoulder, as Finn’s eyes slid away from the large photograph of Spiderman’s ass which graced the wall in front of the descending escalator.

s/o to the weird spider-man butt mural at the Regal Union Square, it’s been way too long since i’ve seen you in person </3 

(obviously this fic is kind of a romcom vibe so i thought starting with a joke (or at least. an attempt at humor) made sense.

8. “Are you…” a kiss to the back of John's neck, fervent and wet, more than a little guilty; the thrusts of his hips don’t stop, but they do slow, to a wrenching, unsteady rhythm. “Are you okay? Am I…” another kiss, and a soft, snuffling sound by John’s ear. “Am I hurting you?"  

aw, snuffling. 

anyway. i always feel a LITTLE cringey having the first line of a fic be so obviously mid sex scene bc idk, it’s kind of an abrupt thing to walk in on, as a reader, but this was meant to be kind of an awks moment and kind of an awks hook up in general so i felt like that abruptness was appropriate. also the contrast between the beginning of this fic being like, a fairly explicit sex scene and the last scene being (as always) cute sleepy cuddles was some kind of point, idk.

(this was also an interesting opening scene in general bc the game of it was, how obvious to make it that it’s chas without actually using his name)

9.  He knocks on the door.

lol boring!!! this is right up there with a character waking up in the morning in terms of unoriginal/obvious starting lines. but sometimes you’re just being a basic bitch and well i’m often a basic bitch

10. John is next to him. Still asleep, a few inches away. Breathing soft and steady, shoulders loose, the beginning of a bruise blossoming on the side of his neck. Curled up, radiating satisfied warmth even though they aren’t quite touching.

what did i tell you!!! waking up in the morning, basic shit. obviously thematically the fic is about uh the relationship progressing from that distance to like, no distance (ending, as it does, with sleepy cuddles) so it’s a very basic fic, so why not have a very basic start

11.  “What’d he say?”

not much to say here except again w/ the in media res, but it’s a shame this fic doesn’t have a punchier opening bc it’s genuinely one of my favs

12.  Chas stretches — tucks his left elbow around his right, and pulls his right arm against his chest; reverses it, left hand coming perilously close to John’s chest as he does. 

this is just setting up a chas chandler thirst fic so that’s. mostly what it is.

13. John, half-awake and blissfully warm, feels the bed shift.

see??? another waking up in the morning opener lmfao. i’ve actively stopped starting fics this way, it just feels a little...easy?

14. There’s a light on in the living room when he gets home.

FAIRLY unexceptional but i do like the implications of coziness and domesticity here -- the idea of someone waiting for you, y’know? and ultimately that is kind of the point of the fic -- that john is/does wait for him to come back. anyway that’s another of my fav john/chas tropes obviously

15. “Come here often?”  

CRINGE but again. to be fair. this was meant to be chas doing a really lazy pick up line as a joke, so. 

16. COMING THIS FALL, screams the billboard above the subway entrance, in not-quite fluorescent blue letters that are still somehow reminiscent of Tron. AMADI AND KINGSLEY, across the bottom. The rest of the poster is a futuristic kind of grey, the image of a long corridor with a frosted glass door beyond, with the words THURSDAY NEXT scrawled across.

this is mostly a lot of set up for stuff - that it’s set in NYC vs London (i mean obviously, from being Washington Square); that it’s a futuristic kind of movie (which is based on the movie Anna’s promoting at the beginning of notting hill); that it’s taking place before fall (late summer i think); finn and rey’s last names in this fic 

(i went around and around on finn’s last name -- figuring, in the end, that i wanted him to be really obviously Nigerian, though now i wonder if i should’ve -- john boyega vs John Adedayo Bamidele Adegboyega style -- made it a slightly ~easier version of a much more ~foreign name, to really play up the assimilation aspect necessary to succeed in hollywood etc etc. rey’s last name is a play off Kiera Knightley, as that’s the kind of actress mold i saw her in, though rey kinsgley is also just objectively funny to me bc it’s like, Royalty Royalty, isn’t it)

the other thing i wish is that i’d come up with a better sci fi movie name but i think it’s legit one of the last things i came up with for this fic which means at that point i just wanted to post it and be done with the whole thing.

anyway as a more plotty longfic, this was supposed to be more of a traditional first line in the sense of, abrupt and confusing but in a way that was intriguing like -- who are these people? what is this movie? who’s seeing the poster? etc.

17. “Really?"

the contrast between this opening and #16 is making me laugh but that’s just like, my thing of mostly writing short fic i guess. with short fic, it makes sense to start with quick dialogue exchanges, and i like to do it without dialogue tags, even, almost as a flex -- how long can i get away without not identifying the speaker directly but making it obvious who the person speaking is, by virtue of dialogue alone? 

18. "Can tie me up if you’d like,” John says, too loud, in something of a rush.

getting right to the point on this one lmfao

19. Chas is a sound sleeper.

not much to say here aside from this being one of the earliest john/chas in bed, waking up/watching the other sleep fics. one of my favorite tropes apparently

20. He left the debrief with his head pounding from sheer frustration and his jaw aching from the effort of keeping his mouth shut. Military discipline and respect for General Organa was one thing; having to justify perfectly reasonable actions taken in pursuit of doing his job was another.

UGH just serves me right to have this OTHER unfinished WIP show up here. genuinely speaking i think this is kind of a boring opening -- it’s doing too much/trying to hard to like, establish context which IS kind of relevant (the set up for poe being like, stressed out => finn making a move to help ~relax him) but it just feels a little too...much for me. very unsubtle.

TAKEAWAYS: like 5 of these (25%!!) are setting things in bed right before or after a character wakes up!!! if there’s a unifying theme of my writing i guess it’s that i’m really just very tired all of the time huh.

anyway idk if i have a favorite, they’re all mostly just. functional i guess? i don’t think opening (or closing) lines are my strong suit tbh. 

[emelkae]

The Rise of Skywalker takeaways

Do not click open if you haven’t seen TROS/don’t want to read TROS spoilers! I'm on mobile so hopefully this has the Keep Reading thingy. This is from the perspective of someone who liked TFA and disliked TLJ.

The Good: I did like it, generally, for nostalgia reasons. I would say I was satisfied with it as an ending to the sequel trilogy, and some of the things that critics ripped apart felt like no big deal to me.

One critic said watching the trio quip and banter with each other was boring and that it seemed like their scenes were supposed to be interesting merely because they were together. They lamented the lack of earth-shattering dialogue between them and said it felt more fanfiction-y than dialogue should be coming from a professional franchise, but honestly, seeing the three together doing literally anything was something I wanted to see more of, and I loved every second of them sharing the screen. And why should dialogue between friends always be earth-shattering? They were just hangin’ out and it was wonderful. There was so much hugging and shoulder pats.

It was visually the best-looking thing to come out of this franchise. You could take any shot from this movie and stick it on a poster and it would fit. It did sometimes come off as them cramming every piece of concept art into the movie, but it was so beautiful I didn’t even care.

Carrie’s Leia scenes were not as clunky as the critics said they were. I think going into it knowing they were deleted scenes made them seem slightly more “off,” but if I didn’t know that I wouldn’t have found anything wrong with them.

The parallels to the original trilogy were numerous and were obvious fan pandering, but I ate it up. I 100% expected that from J.J. Abrams. Same with the cameos. I got all emotional at the last “be with me” scene, I’ll admit that unabashedly, and I liked the scene at the end with Force Ghost Luke and Leia.

Kylo Ren became basically a Vader clone and I was here for it. I was like “you go you absolute edgelord meme I hate that I love this terrible character so much”

Lando gets to fly the Falcon again ahhhhh he’s reunited with L3 :)

The Palpatine stuff was weird, but I thought it was super cool anyway. Probably it was the visuals that got me, but Star Wars has been weirder, so no complaints from me there.

THE SCENE WITH HAN AND BEN OOOOOOOOOOO BEECH I WAS SO HAPPY. And Luke lifting the X-Wing and smiling directly at the camera like a little shit god damn you you are really just like Obi-Wan in your ghost life ain’t cha?

I didn’t see what all the praise was about with Adam Driver’s acting as Kylo Ren until his transformation into Ben Solo. His whole face smoothed out and it seemed like his eyes got bigger and softer? Catch me being thirsty but I did actually want to see more of him as Ben. His fighting mannerisms were just like Anakin’s, too. And he was just so gentle ghjkjhg

The Bad: Okay…Although I liked it, I do have complaints. Some minor, some major.

It was too long and too much was going on at once. Because there was so much packed in there, the pacing was weird and the scene transitions were very awkward and jerky. They could have cut like a quarter of all that and it would have been fine.

Finn never tells Rey that he’s Force sensitive, and I only knew from context clues and actor interviews that that was what he was going to say to her, so of course they never explore Finn’s relationship to the Force or even mention it any point.

There are soooo many parallels to Leia and Han with Finn and Poe (not to mention the chemistry), but of course they don’t end up together. They introduce some random new female characters who, while badass, are completely flat and are obviously only there as love interests and new action figures to sell. Idk, maybe I’m just salty because my ship isn’t canon. Speaking of new toys, the new droid they introduced was another thing they obviously just wanted to stock shelves with. It was cute though.

Most of the major plot points were out of completely nowhere and were not foreshadowed at all. Rey being a Palpatine and Hux being a spy for the Resistance come to mind. Also, there could have been some really interesting character development with Hux being a spy, like Kallus in Rebels, but then he is just unceremoniously killed by a superfluous random character. Leia’s lightsaber and her whole “oh actually she’s been trained in the Force this whole time” was a cool concept that also came out of nowhere.

The scene with Rey and Kylo fighting above the ocean was just awful. It was twice as long as it needed to be, the fighting was clumsy (a critic said it was like they were swinging baseball bats at each other and it absolutely was), and some parts of it were so needlessly dramatic that I was laughing at what was supposed to be a serious scene.

I wish they would've left Threepio's memory wiped. They made the wipe such a huge emotional deal and then were like "nvm Artoo can just stick a thing in his head and it's all good" and I was like "...oh so all that was for no reason then I guess"

The Ugly: I. Do not. Ship. Reylo. I don’t ship it and have never shipped it. I don’t get aggressive toward people who do (ship and let ship, y’know?), but it personally makes me uncomfortable and just feels creepy. So as pretty as I find Ben and as gentle as he was with Rey, I kinda imploded at the kiss and was so upset that I said “Nope nope nope fuck no” out loud in the theater and closed my eyes. Especially since I think the comics established that Palpatine is Anakin’s dad, and he’s also Rey’s grandfather, which I think makes Ben and Rey like…first cousins once removed or something. That was the only thing that made me genuinely really pissed off about the movie, that Reylo is…I guess canon? Even though Ben died right after? It was very very weird and I hated it. And it made NO SENSE. I liked watching Driver as Ben, but I didn't think Kylo deserved a redemption and certainly didn't want it to be that sudden and short. Him dying was also done weirdly.

Overall: Most of my complaints are just me nitpicking, with the exception of the last one. I am actually glad I went to go see it. The good does outweigh the bad for me. While I can definitively say I liked TFA and hated TLJ, I can only say this one made me feel mostly good when I left the theater. It was bad as a movie, but good to just romp nostalgically through the Star Wars universe with.

[dweemeister]

2019 Movie Odyssey Awards

As the 2019 Movie Odyssey Award for Best Original Song final was extended, the 2019 Movie Odyssey Awards themselves are late. As always, this is the annual awards ceremony to recognize a year of films that I saw for the first time in their entirety in the calendar year. All films featured - with the exception of those in the Worst Picture category (and even then, the Worst Picture winner won a competitive award below) - are worth seeing.

The full list of every single film I saw as part of the 2019 Movie Odyssey can be seen in this link.

Best Pictures (I name ten winners, none of which are distinguished above the other nine)

The Ascent (1977, Soviet Union)

An Autumn Afternoon (1962, Japan)

BlacKkKlansman (2018)

The Informer (1935)

Kuroneko (1968, Japan)

Once Upon a Time in Hollywood (2019)

Sons of the Desert (1933)

Victor/Victoria (1982)

The Westerner (1940)

Woodstock (1970)

Three of these Best Picture winners received 10/10 from yours truly: The Ascent, Sons of the Desert, and Woodstock. To my discredit, there are - for the second consecutive time - no silent films here. It is also the second consecutive Best Picture lineups without entries from the 1990s or 2000s. This is the first Best Picture lineup without a winner from the 1950s. It is, as a result of my seeing fewer feature-length films than usual this year, the most monolingual Best Picture field in a while. This field of ten runs the gamut of comedy, documentary (Woodstock is only the third documentary of 80 over the last eight years to be a Best Picture winner), horror, musical, American Western, war, family drama, and historical drama.

Best Comedy

Booksmart (2019)

Design for Living (1933)

The Great McGinty (1940)

Jewel Robbery (1932)

Jour de Fête (1949, France)

Sitting Pretty (1948)

Smokey and the Bandit (1977)

Sons of the Desert

Toy Story 4 (2019)

Victor/Victoria

Most of these had me bursting in laughter. Design for Living not Jewel Robbery may not have been gut-burstingly funny, but I appreciate the wittiness of ‘30s romantic comedies and so there get a spot here. Booksmart is the best pure comedy of 2019 and Smokey and the Bandit has been described by a few Southerners of not so much a comedy as it is a documentary of Southern culture in the 1970s. But Sons of the Desert, with Laurel and Hardy’s slapstick mastery, takes it away here. Fun fact: “Sons of the Desert” is the name of the international Laurel and Hardy fan club (its founding documents co-written by Stan Laurel).

Best Musical

Frozen II (2019)

The Happiest Millionaire (1967)

King of Jazz (1930)

Mary Poppins Returns (2018)

The Perils of Pauline (1947)

Rocketman (2019)

Thousands Cheer (1943)

Victor/Victoria

Oh this wasn’t close. Some films here may have packed more songs into their runtime (The Happiest Millionaire and Mary Poppins Returns), others were more fantastical (Rocketman), or dispensed with a plot altogether to concentrate on the music (Thousands Cheer)... but Victor/Victoria felt narratively decades of its time and was bolstered by an outstanding performance by Julie Andrews. Credit to Henry Mancini and Leslie Bricusse for their musical score, too.

Best Animated Feature

Frozen II

Fun and Fancy Free (1947)

How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World (2019)

Modest Heroes (2018, Japan)

Toy Story 4

There have been years where some category dries up in its nominees. This year, it was certainly animated feature. The wave of recent non-English language animated films that usually populate this category were severely diminished to just one last year: Modest Heroes. The weakest Toy Story film of the four - note that this bar is extremely high - is your winner, just edging HTTYD.

Best Documentary

The African Lion (1955)

Hale County This Morning, This Evening (2018)

Made in Vietnam (2017)

Minding the Gap (2018)

Pavarotti (2019)

Seadrift (2019)

Walk Run Cha-Cha (2019 short)

While I Breathe, I Hope (2018)

Woodstock

Yellowstone Cubs (1963)

A year that saw yours truly watch many more documentaries than usual sees Woodstock, directed by Michael Wadleigh, as the winner here. Woodstock perfectly immerses the viewer into the totality of the eponymous 1969 music festival of the same name and is one of the great concert films. Runners-up included the experimental Hale County This Morning, This Evening  (a collection of contemporary images of black lives in Hale County, Alabama) and the excellent Minding the Gap (an observational glimpse into the lives of three friends from Rockford, Illinois who are all drawn to skateboarding and a devastating portrait of youth and masculinity in America) - both Oscar nominees and both shown on PBS earlier in 2019.

Congratulations to Walk Run Cha-Cha for being the first short film nominated in this category since 2015. I first saw it as part of the curatorial committee on Viet FIlm Fest this year and this New York Times film is now shortlisted as a potential Best Documentary Short Film nominee for the 92nd Academy Awards.

Best Non-English Language Film

The Ascent, Soviet Union

An Autumn Afternoon, Japan

Barnali (1963), India

The Garden of Mr. Vong (2017 short), Germany

Ginger and Fred (1986), Italy

Jour de Fête, France

Kuroneko, Japan

La Pointe Courte (1955), France

Pitfall (1962), Japan

Song Lang (2018), Vietnam

I may have seen fewer non-English language films this year, but there’s still a great selection here. In what was essentially a choice between The Ascent or An Autumn Afternoon, the only 10/10 recipient is the winner here. Vietnam has its first appearance in this category with Leon Le’s Song Lang - which is still making the film festival circuits.

Best Silent Film

Bobby Bumps and His Pointer Pup (1916 short)

Bobby Bumps at the Dentist (1918 short)

Bobby Bumps, Chef (1917 short)

Bobby Bumps in Their Master’s Voice (1921 short)

Bobby Bumps’ Last Smoke (1919 short)

Bobby Bumps Starts for School (1917 short)

The Curse of Quon Gwon: When the Far East Mingles with the West (1916 short)

Dr. Mabuse the Gambler (1922, Germany)

The Racket (1928)

Street Angel (1928)

As you can see, I didn’t see a lot of silent films this year. Dominated by Earl Hurd’s Bobby Bumps series of animated short films - Hurd innovated cel animation, a technique that would be used by pretty much everyone in hand-drawn animation for several decades - the winner is Fritz Lang’s sprawling crime epic, Dr. Mabuse the Gambler. The first Mabuse film is a solid, if imperfect, example of German Expressionism, a movement emphasizing darker stories and production/lighting design depending upon extremely angled sets and high-contrast lights and shadows.

Personal Favorite Film

Booksmart

The Farewell (2019)

House of Usher (1960)

The Moon-Spinners (1964)

Murder, She Said (1961)

One Foot in Heaven (1941)

Smokey and the Bandit

Sons of the Desert

Toy Story 4

The War of the Worlds (1953)

“I can hear the scratch of rat claws in the stone walls.” I mean, come on. How could one not appreciate Vincent Price’s straight performance in a fun, albeit loose, adaptation of Poe’s The Fall of the House of Usher? Such a great horror movie for an October evening and you don’t want to be scared out your wits. Runners-up were two other literary adaptations: Murder, She Said (adapted from Agatha Christie’s 4.50 from Paddington and starring a fantastic Margaret Rutherford as Ms. Marple) and The War of the Worlds (a chilling adaptation of H.G. Wells’ novel, with special effects convincing for its time and a change of setting to SoCal).

Best Director

Stuart Cooper, Overlord (1975)

John Ford, The Informer

Fritz Lang, Dr. Mabuse the Gambler

Spike Lee, BlacKkKlansman

Laurence Olivier, Henry V (1944)

Yasujirô Ozu, An Autumn Afternoon

Irving Rapper, One Foot in Heaven

Larisa Shepitko, The Ascent

Kaneto Shindô, Kuroneko

Michael Wadleigh, Woodstock

By no agenda at all, we have our first woman winner in Best Director. Shepitko directs her film with the utmost discipline and interest; it is to cinema’s misfortune that she died so young. Other considerations were Ford, Olivier, Ozu, and Wadleigh.

Best Acting Ensemble

An Autumn Afternoon

BlacKkKlansman

The Farewell

The Great McGinty

The Holly and the Ivy (1952)

O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000)

Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

One Foot in Heaven

Victor/Victoria

The Whales of August (1987)

Standout performances alone don’t always triumph here, nor do big names. So when it comes to collective performances, there was a wealth of options from the 2019 Movie Odyssey. Just edging An Autumn Afternoon (recommended for those who have seen several Ozu films) and The Whales of August (which I would recommend for those who have seen plenty of Bette Davis, Lillian Gish, and Vincent Price) is The Farewell. What surprised me most about the movie was how well-directed it was. I came into it expecting it to be poignantly written, but the caliber of acting from the cast was astoundingly high.

Best Actor

Demián Bichir, A Better Life (2011)

Yul Brynner, Anastasia

Rudolf Klein-Rogge, Dr. Mabuse the Gambler

Fredric March, One Foot in Heaven

Marcello Mastroianni, Ginger and Fred

Victor McLaglen, The Informer

Laurence Olivier, Henry V

Vincent Price, House of Usher

Burt Reynolds, Smokey and the Bandit

Edward G. Robinson, Little Caesar (1931)

Somewhat forgotten amid more popular John Ford films is The Informer. And with that, mostly forgotten is Victor McLaglen’s performance. McLaglen was a major star who peaked in the late 1920s and 1930s, mostly playing Irish drunks even though he himself was of English origin. He was relegated to supporting roles in the 1940s and beyond. He’s a force of nature as Gypo Nolan in The Informer though, and it is his brute force and physical acting that carries him over the likes March, Olivier, Price, and Robinson (who is my second choice here).

Best Actress

Jane Alexander, The Great White Hope (1970)

Julie Andrews, Victor/Victoria

Constance Bennett, What Price Hollywood? (1932)

Ingrid Bergman, Anastasia

Janet Gaynor, Street Angel

Giulietta Masina, Ginger and Fred

Yûko Mochizuki, Farewell to Dream (1956)

Lupita Nyong’o, Us (2019)

Ann Rutherford, Murder, She Said

Sharmila Tagore, Barnali

What can she not do? We think of Julie Andrews so much as the governess or nanny who makes everything right in the end. For those who don’t know, Andrews stars in Victor/Victoria as Victoria Grant, a struggling song-and-dance lady who, going along with her friend Robert Preston’s get-rich-quick plans, plays a man named Count Victor Grezhinski who plays a woman. Confused? Then you probably haven’t seen the movie (thanks to Blake Andrews’ direction, the film sells the illusion even though we the viewer can see through the disguise). Behind Andrews are Bergman, Nyong’o, and Rutherford.

Best Supporting Actor

Mahershala Ali, Green Book (2018)

Walter Brennan, The Westerner

Jackie Gleason, Smokey and the Bandit

Tom Hanks, A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood (2019)

Tim Blake Nelson, O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Brad Pitt, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

Robert Preston, Victor/Victoria

Anatoly Solonitsyn, The Ascent

Akim Tamiroff, The Great McGinty

Eijirô Tôno, Farewell to Dream

Supporting categories tend to like villainous roles. In a faux supporting role, Walter Brennan - that raspy-voiced (because of his exposure to mustard gas while serving in WWI) coot who had the misfortune/fortune? to always look at least sixty or seventy years old - is “Judge” Roy Bean, a hanging judge who holds kangaroo courts in his lawless corner of Texas. Charismatic, out-of-touch, sexist, and silver-tongued is Brennan in this film... and never for a moment is he anything other than a delight to watch (as much as you may hate his character). Within striking distance are Brad Pitt and Akim Solonitsyn.

Best Supporting Actress

Amy Adams, Vice (2018)

Beulah Bondi, One Foot in Heaven

Doris Davenport, The Westerner

Helen Hayes, Anastasia

Holly Hunter, O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Regina King, If Beale Street Could Talk (2018)

Yoshiko Kuga, Farewell to Dream

Maureen O’Hara, Sitting Pretty

Kiwako Taichi, Kuroneko

Lesley Ann Warren, Victor/Victoria

The most recent Oscar winner for Best Supporting Actress does the same thing here for If Beale Street Could Talk. As the mother of the female lead in the film, King is an emotional scene-stealer from the first moment we meet her. Her character’s sojourn to Puerto Rico late in the film solidifies that. Far behind King is Yoshiko Kuga.

Best Adapted Screenplay

Yuri Klepikov and Larisa Shepitko, The Ascent

Charlie Wachtel, David Rabinowitz, Kevin Wilmott, and Spike Lee, BlacKkKlansman

Ben Hecht, Design for Living

Lulu Wang, The Farewell

Howard Sackler, The Great White Hope

Kaneto Shindo, Kuroenko

Dudley Nichols, The Informer

Ethan Coen and Joel Coen, O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Casey Robinson, One Foot in Heaven

F. Hugh Herbert, Sitting Pretty

One Foot in Heaven is a film with its Christian themes on its sleeve. Hell, the film does revolve around a Methodist minister, his family, and the community he serves over the course of a few decades. But it is a film with no need to proselytize, its heart understanding how human suffering can be tempered with mercy and forgiveness. Runners-up were BlacKkKlansman; The Farewell; and O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Best Original Screenplay

James Gray and Ethan Gross, Ad Astra (2019)

Kôgo Noda and Yasujirô Ozu, An Autumn Afternoon

Emily Halpern, Sarah Haskins, Susanna Fogel, and Katie Silberman, Booksmart

Federico Fellini, Tonino Guerra, and Tullio Pinelli, Ginger and Fred

Preston Sturges, The Great McGinty

Rian Johnson, Knives Out (2019)

Quentin Tarantino, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

Christopher Hudson and Stuart Cooper, Overlord

Kôbô Abe, Pitfall

Oliver Hardy, Jack Barty, Stan Laurel, William A. Seiter, Glenn Tyron, and Eddie Welch, Sons of the Desert

Ozu’s final film shows that, though he usually revolved around familial dramas, never changed his signature visual aesthetic, and demanded little sensational acting, his films were always imbued with a deeply-ingrained humanity - asking complex questions about aspects of our familial or public lives that we would not give a second thought to. Ozu and his frequent collaborator Noda make those mundanities cinematic. That is why he is one of the greatest writer-directors who has ever lived.

Best Cinematography

Hoyte Van Hoytema, Ad Astra

Alfred Milotte and Elma Milotte, The African Lion

Vladimir Chukhnov and Pavel Lebeshev, The Ascent

Robert Krasker, Henry V

Joseph H. August, The Informer

Kiyomi Kuroda, Kuroneko

Roger Deakins, O Brother, Where Art Thou?

John Alcott, Overlord

Paul Ivano and Ernest Palmer, Street Angel

Frank V. Phillips, The Wild Country (1970)

In the history of WWII films, Overlord almost always never gets a mention. But this highly personal story of one young British soldier’s service on D-Day - and its shocking, but realistic ending - is beautifully shot. Runners-up include The Ascent and Kuroneko.

Best Film Editing

Norman R. Palmer, The African Lion

Uncredited, Dr. Mabuse the Gambler

Andrew Buckland, Michael McCusker, and Dirk Westervelt, Ford v Ferrari (2019)

George Hively, The Informer

Alain Resnais, La Pointe Courte

Ethan Coen, Joel Coen, and Tricia Cooke, O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Jonathan Gili, Overlord

Barney Wolf, Street Angel

Everett Douglas, The War of the Worlds

Thelma Schoonmaker, Jere Huggins, Martin Scorsese, Michael Wadleigh, Stanley Warnow, and Yeu-Bun Yee, Woodstock

Taking editing techniques that had been used but not pieced together so masterfully before give the Woodstock team the victory here. Their closest competition came from Ford v Ferrari, Overlord, and The War of the Worlds.

Best Adaptation or Musical Score

An Ton That and Leon Le, and Song Lang

T Bone Burnett, O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Alfonso Corelli and Milton Ager, King of Jazz

Robert Emmett Dolan, The Perils of Pauline

Ian Neil, Rocketman

Robert Lopez and Kristen Anderson-Lopez, Frozen II

Henry Mancini and Leslie Bricusse, Victor/Victoria

Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman, Mary Poppins Returns

Robert B. Sherman and Richard M. Sherman, The Happiest Millionaire

Herbert Stothart, Thousands Cheer

Every song was an original in Song Lang. And with cải lương a receding artform in Vietnam, what an unlikely shot in the arm Song Lang is - the beauty of its melodies and especially those lyrics. This category, which advantages musical scores over adaptation scores, also saw Mancini and Bricusse nearly take this one.

Best Original Score

Terence Blanchard, BlacKkKlansman

Bronislau Kaper, The Red Badge of Courage (1951)

Alfred Newman, Anastasia

John Powell, How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World

Leonard Rosenman, Fantastic Voyage

Alfred Schnittke, The Ascent

Max Steiner, The Informer

Leith Stevens, The War of the Worlds

William Walton, Henry V

John Williams, Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker (2019)

Not the best field for Original Score, but our winner ranks among the greatest film scores of all time. For the second straight year, a composer better known for their classical music work rather than film scoring has won. Following Ralph Vaughan Williams for 49th Parallel (1941) is fellow Englishman William Walton. For Olivier’s adaptation of Shakespeare’s Henry V, Walton was inspired by Elizabethan music, stunning magisterial fanfares. And, of course, there is the passacaglia “Death of Falstaff”. Walton beats Newman, Steiner, and Williams by a country mile.

Best Original Song

“Are We Dancing?”, music and lyrics by Richard M. Sherman and Robert B. Sherman, The Happiest Millionaire

“Crazy World”, music by Henry Mancini, lyrics by Leslie Bricusse, Victor/Victoria

“East Bound and Down”, music and lyrics by Jerry Reed, Smokey and the Bandit

“I Wish I Didn’t Love You So”, music and lyrics by Frank Loesser, The Perils of Pauline

“(I’m Gonna) Love Me Again”, music by Elton John, lyrics by Bernie Taupin, Rocketman

“Le Jazz Hot!”, music by Henry Macini, lyrics by Leslie Bricusse, Victor/Victoria

“The Next Right Thing”, music and lyrics by Robert Lopez and Kristen Anderson-Lopez, Frozen II

“The Shady Dame from Seville”, music by Henry Mancini, lyrics by Leslie Bricusse, Victor/Victoria

“Trường Tương Tư”, music and lyrics by Leon Le, Song Lang

“Woodstock”, music and lyrics by Joni Mitchell, Woodstock

Thank you all to those who participated in the preliminary and the final round of MOABOS this year!

Best Costume Design

René Hubert, Anastasia

Roger K. Furse, Henry V

Walter Plunkett, The Informer

Herman Rosse, King of Jazz

Yoshio Ueno, Kuroneko

Mary Zophres, O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Sarah Edwards, Ocean’s Eight (2018)

Edith Head and Waldo Angelo, The Perils of Pauline

Ghia Fam, Song Lang

Patricia Norris, Victor/Victoria

There were a handful of films I saw in 2019 that were revue musicals - something that, unless you’re an aficionado of musical theater history or know musical films, is unfamiliar to most people in 2020. A revue musical is a musical that features a collection of musical numbers that serve no narrative purpose when put together, often integrating dance or comedy sketches. Revue musicals were far more popular in the first half of the twentieth century. King of Jazz is an early two-strip Technicolor revue musical and its costume design reflects the extreme stylistic and cultural differences of its musical numbers. Behind King of Jazz are Anastasia and Song Lang.

Best Makeup and Hairstyling

Ma Kalaadevi Ananda and Tony Ward, A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood

Uncredited, Dr. Mabuse the Gambler

Tony Sforzini and Vivienne Walker, Henry V

Jack P. Pierce, King of Jazz

Shigeo Kobayashi, Kuroneko

Louise McCarthy and Alan D’Angerio, Ocean’s Eight

Wally Westmore, The Perils of Pauline

Le Cam Huong, Song Lang

Greg Cannom, Kate Biscoe, and Patricia Dehaney, Vice

Paul Engelen, Harry Frampton, Peter Frampton, and Bobbie Smith, Victor/Victoria

Damn there was a lot of makeup in this movie, rendering certain actors unrecognizable. As much as despised Vice (more on that shortly), it takes the cake here. Also being considered was Dr. Mabuse the Gambler.

Best Production Design

John Graysmark, Andrej Andrejew, and William C. Andrews, Anastasia

Otto Hunte, Erich Kettelhut, Karl Stahl-Urach, and Karl Vollbrecht, Dr. Mabuse the Gambler

Jack Martin Smith, Dale Hennesy, Walter M. Scott, and Stuart A. Reiss, Fantastic Voyage (1966)

Paul Sheriff and Carmen Dillon, Henry V

Van Nest Polglase and Julia Heron, The Informer

John Myhre and Gordon Sim, Mary Poppins Returns

Anthony Masters, The Moon-Spinners

Cedric Gibbons, Daniel B. Cathcart, Edwin B. Willis, and Jacques Mersereau, Thousands Cheer

Rodger Maus, Tim Hutchinson, William Craig Smith, and Harry Cordwell, Victor/Victoria

Harper Goff, The Vikings (1958)

An absolutely ridiculous German Expressionist classic with ridiculous production design that would not have passed in an era with color. The amount of sets needed would have been mind-boggling. Behind Mabuse is Henry V (credit to the reconstruction of the Globe Theater).

Achievement in Visual Effects (all are winners because it would be unfair to compare the visuals of Ad Astra against 1953′s The War of the Worlds)

Ad Astra

Detective Pikachu (2019)

Fantastic Voyage

Ford v Ferrari

Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019)

King of Jazz

Niagara (1953)

The War of the Worlds

Worst Picture

Gus (1976)

The Last Flight of Noah’s Ark (1980)

Vice

The World’s Greatest Athlete (1973)

Adam McKay’s conceit for The Big Short (2015) fails spectacularly with Vice - which I found neither funny nor enlightening. It is your “winner” over some pretty culturally insensitive, somewhat entertaining movies that folks who were creating Disney+ probably have not watched.

Honorary Awards:

Kevin Brownlow, for his efforts in silent film preservation

Earl Hurd, for innovating cel animation in film through the Bobby Bumps series

Robert Israel, for his modern-day film scores helping audiences connect to silent films

Jacqueline Stewart, for her scholarship on black cinema in the United States

FILMS WITH MULTIPLE NOMINATIONS (excluding Worst Picture... 48)

Fourteen: Victor/Victoria Nine: The Informer Eight: O Brother, Where Art Thou? Seven: The Ascent; Henry V; Kuroneko Six: Dr. Mabuse the Gambler; One Foot in Heaven Five: An Autumn Afternoon; BlacKkKlansman; King of Jazz; The Perils of Pauline; Smokey and the Bandit; Song Lang; Woodstock Four: Frozen II; Ginger and Fred; The Great McGinty; Once Upon a Time in Hollywood; Overlord;  Sons of the Desert; Street Angel; The War of the Worlds Three: Ad Astra; The African Lion; Booksmart; The Farewell; Farewell to Dream; The Happiest Millionaire; Mary Poppins Returns; Rocketman; Sitting Pretty; Thousands Cheer; Toy Story 4; Vice; The Westerner Two: Barnali; A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood; Design for Living; The Great White Hope; House of Usher; How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World; Jour de Fête; La Pointe Courte; The Moon-Spinners; Murder, She Said; Ocean’s Eight; Pitfall

Victor/Victoria’s nominations haul is a record for the Movie Odyssey Awards.

WINNERS (excluding honorary awards and Worst Picture; 28) 3 wins: The Ascent, Victor/Victoria; Woodstock 2 wins: An Autumn Afternoon; Dr. Mabuse the Gambler; The Informer; King of Jazz; Sons of the Desert; The Westerner 1 win: Ad Astra; The Ascent; Detective Pikachu; Fantastic Voyage; The Farewell; Ford v Ferrari; Henry V; House of Usher; Godzilla: King of the Monsters; If Beale Street Could Talk; Kuroneko; Niagara; Once Upon a Time in Hollywood; One Foot in Heaven; Overlord; The Perils of Pauline; Song Lang; Toy Story 4; Vice; The War of the Worlds

85 films were nominated in 26 categories.

[eddycurrents]

For the week of 11 November 2019

Quick Bits:

Batman & The Outsiders #7 throws some further ramifications of Ra’s al Ghul and his minions meddling with Duke and Sofia. Some particularly disturbing transformations going on with Duke that should be interesting. The level of intrigue that Bryan Hill is keeping in the story is gripping.

| Published by DC Comics

The Batman’s Grave #2 is another excellent issue. A little more packed with action than the first one, allowing Bryan Hitch to cut loose with some of the sequences. Also, I’m loving the humour that Warren Ellis is giving us between Alfred and Bruce. That acerbic wit is something we’ve seen from Alfred a lot and Ellis just nails the voice.

| Published by DC Comics

Battlepug #3 is more fun from Mike Norton, Allen Passalaqua, and Crank! Some really nice stuff here as Bryony cuts loose on Nobody’s Ponies. I absolutely love the mix of traditional sword and sorcery storytelling with rather over-the-top humour that basically lampoons it at the same time.

| Published by Image

Black Cat Annual #1 is a fun tale of a heist on the Maggia by Black Cat and Spider-Man from Jed MacKay, Joey Vazquez, Natacha Bustos, Juan Gedeon, Brian Reber, and Ferran Delgado. It features the usual humour and action that we see in the series and I quite like how the artists are broken up each following one particular aspect of the story. Though it’s all one narrative, it gives a nice differing feel to each part.

| Published by Marvel

Black Hammer / Justice League: Hammer of Justice #5 concludes what has been an excellent series from Jeff Lemire, Michael Walsh, and Nate Piekos. Ultimately, this has reminded me of the old JLA/JSA crossovers of old, and just feels great as an overall story. Plus the possibility of seeing a sequel.

| Published by Dark Horse & DC Comics

Black Panther and the Agents of Wakanda #3 begins “God Loves, Moon Kills”, another two-parter for this series, from Jim Zub, Lan Medina, Craig Yeung, Marcio Menyz, Federico Blee, and Joe Sabino. I love this story format, giving us essentially quick-hit missions dealing with a problem and then moving on. It’s yielded some pretty tight storytelling and some fascinating situations.

| Published by Marvel

Black Stars Above #1 is another incredible debut for Vault, with Lonnie Nadler, Jenna Cha, Brad Simpson, and Hassan Otsmane-Elhaou delivering an incredibly deep and unique horror story. It centres around a young woman in a family of fur traders, as the trade itself begins to die in Canada, and it’s impressive as to how real the characters and their struggle feels. The artwork from Cha and Simpson is exquisite.

| Published by Vault

Buffy + Angel: Hellmouth #2 continues Buffy and Angel’s descent through hell. It’s much more cerebral than you’d expect, with the demons trying to get into Buffy and Angel’s respective heads in order to manipulate and destroy them. Plus, a rather interesting surprise. Jordie Bellaire, Jeremy Lambert, Eleonora Carlini, Cris Peter, and Ed Dukeshire are doing some great work with the core of this event.

| Published by BOOM! Studios

Collapser #5 somehow gets even stranger in this penultimate issue as Liam creates a “perfect” world to run away from the problems he’s having in the real world. The real world bleeding through and a revelation of his girlfriend’s true intentions just ratchet up the strangeness further. Mikey Way, Shaun Simon, Ilias Kyriazis, Cris Peter, and Simon Bowland are just doing amazing work here.

| Published by DC Comics / Young Animal

Detective Comics #1015 takes an interesting turn as Nora decides that she likes being a villain. Through this, Peter J. Tomasi is definitely showing an interesting side to Mr. Freeze, emphasizing again that he’s a rather conflicted villain, only doing the various heinous actions to save his wife. Who now doesn’t need him.

| Published by DC Comics

Doctor Mirage #4 features more incredibly beautiful, inventive artwork from Nick Robles and Jordie Bellaire. The visual storytelling as Shan faces the Embalmer is just incredible. Magdalene Visaggio, Robles, Bellaire, and Dave Sharpe continue to deliver magic with this penultimate issue.

| Published by Valiant

Edgar Allan Poe’s Snifter of Terror: Season Two #2 is another entertaining issue. The lead tale from Tom Peyer, Greg Scott, Lee Loughridge, and Rob Steen has traditional EC Comics horror vibes, as a scientist tries to communicate with our worm overlords. In one of the comics back-ups Mark Russell, Peter Snejbjerg, and Steen revisit the world of the breakfast cereal monsters. And there’s the usual prose pieces, poetry, and Hunt Emerson’s Black Cat. 

| Published by Ahoy

Event Leviathan #6 concludes this series from Brian Michael Bendis, Alex Maleev, and Josh Reed. How much you enjoy it will hinge on how much you enjoy Maleev’s art and the realization that most of this tale is about moving one person off the board and the reveal of Leviathan to set up further stories. Also, Bendis paints a Batman who is ridiculously terrible at hiding his secret identity.

| Published by DC Comics

Fallen Angels #1 is the final new first issue of this first wave of “Dawn of X” titles and in many ways it’s more personal than the other X-titles, even Excalibur, delving into Psylocke (the former Kwannon, not Betsy Braddock) and her past. Bryan Hill, Szymon Kudranski, Frank D’Armata, and Joe Sabino deliver an interesting story with hooks on the darker side of the X-world, including some ominous bits from Magneto and Sinister, but I question the inclusion of X-23 and Cable. They don’t exactly seem to fit the roles they’ve been put into here.

| Published by Marvel

Family Tree #1 is a phenomenal debut from Jeff Lemire, Phil Hester, Eric Gapstur, Ryan Cody, and Steve Wands. This first issue perfectly captures that insidious nature of family drama mixed with creeping terror and body horror as a bizarre plague begins spreading across America.

| Published by Image

Far Sector #1 is one of the most impressive debuts I’ve read in a long time. NK Jemisin, Jamal Campbell, and Deron Bennett create a rich new world in the City Enduring and a compelling character in the new Green Lantern, Sojourner Mullein. The murder mystery that ties everything together is just the icing on the cake. Incredible world-building here and drop dead gorgeous artwork. Do not miss this.

| Published by DC Comics / Young Animal

The Flash #82 is part one of “Rogues’ Reign” from Joshua Williamson, Rafa Sandoval, Jordi Tarragona, Arif Prianto, and Steve Wands. It features a Central City taken over by the Rogues, transformed into their own personal playgrounds, as the Flash is nowhere to be found. It’s not bad, but the amount you’re going to like it may be relative to how much you’re also enjoying “City of Bane” and the recently concluded similar arc involving the Trickster.

| Published by DC Comics

Folklords #1 is off to a fantastic start from Matt Kindt, Matt Smith, Chris O’Halloran, and Jim Campbell. It starts off with a precocious kid in a fantasy world who’s been having visions of what essentially amounts to our world, whose quest sets out a rather draconian lockdown on their society when the Librarians rein in everyone from illicit action, like finding the Folklords. Highly recommended.

| Published by BOOM! Studios

Forgotten Home #2 reveals more about Jannada, its history and society, and how an unjust queen was brought to rule through racial warfare. Love the artwork from Marika Cresta and Matt Emmons.

| Published by Vices Press

Gideon Falls #18 unleashes the Laughing Man on reality in part two of “The Pentoculus”. Jeff Lemire, Andrea Sorrentino, Dave Stewart, and Steve Wands are beautifully unfolding this twisted and horrific flower of a story.

| Published by Image

Gotham City Monsters #3 adds another element of DC lore to the series as Melmoth claims a particular prize. I really quite like how Steve Orlando, Amancay Nahuelpan, Trish Mulvihill, and Tom Napolitano are pulling together disparate bits of Gotham and beyond to craft this story.

| Published by DC Comics

Guardians of the Galaxy #11 is the penultimate issue of this series from Donny Cate, Cory Smith, Victor Olazaba, David Curiel, and Cory Petit. It’s basically a big fight between the remaining Guardians and everyone else. It doesn’t go so well.

| Published by Marvel

Hawkman #18 takes a somewhat different approach to Hawkman’s infection than what we’ve seen of the others so far. Rather than being a dark reflection of Hawkman’s own desires, he’s taken over by an Earth-3 incarnation in Sky Tyrant. Robert Venditti, Pat Olliffe, Tom Palmer, Jeremiah Skipper, and Richard Starkings & Comicraft instead use that to play the spirit of our Hawkman against.

| Published by DC Comics

Hit-Girl: Season Two #10 is part two of “India”. The artwork from Alison Sampson and Tríona Farrell is impressive, given an amazing level of detail to bringing Mumbai to life. Brutal and rich in colour.

| Published by Image

House of Whispers #15 takes a new twist as the Corinthian finds the House of Watchers, takes over, and everything changes. Nalo Hopkinson, Dan Watters, Dominike “Dono” Stanton, Zac Atkinson, and AndWorld Design kick off some new terrors as even Erzulie’s status quo is upended, and we get another guest appearance of John Constantine’s homecoming.

| Published by DC Comics - Black Label / The Sandman Universe

Invaders #11 pushes deeper into Steve and Namor’s history and relationship, as Steve refuses to give up on his old friend. There’s some very heavy, very good character work here as we head into the final issue. Chip Zdarsky, Carlos Magno, Butch Guice, Alex Guimarães, and Travis Lanham continue to astonish at the incredibly high bar they’ve set for this story.

| Published by Marvel

Justice League Odyssey #15 is a fun tale from Dan Abnett, Will Conrad, Rain Beredo, Pete Pantazis, and AndWorld Design. Jessica Cruz leading a rag tag band of villains (and Orion) against Darkseid and the previous JLO turned evil is unfolding as a very entertaining story with some interesting twists. Also, Dex-Starr is awesome.

| Published by DC Comics

Morbius #1 isn’t a bad start from Vita Ayala, Marcelo Ferreira, Roberto Poggi, Dono Sánchez-Almara, and Clayton Cowles. This first issue is largely just action as Morbius sets out on his quest to cure himself, again, but it’s not bad. The art from Ferreira, Poggi, and Sánchez-Almara is very nice.

| Published by Marvel

Oblivion Song #21 continues the slowburn investigation and reconnaissance of the Faceless Men’s base, as Marco tries to map it out and discover where they’re holding all of the people who decided to stay in Oblivion. Gorgeous artwork from Lorenzo De Felici and Annalisa Leoni as we see more of the Faceless Men’s technology.

| Published by Image / Skybound

Psi-Lords #6 does a bit more world-building as we find out more about the Psi-Lords and the Starwatchers, even as the four Earthers are beset by the other Marked in a bizarre farce of a trial. Fred Van Lente, Renato Guedes, and Dave Sharpe are telling a pretty great sci-fi adventure tale here. It largely stands alone in the greater Valiant universe framework and deserves more attention than its getting.

| Published by Valiant

Punisher: Soviet #1 is another welcome return to the Punisher by Garth Ennis, stepping back into Frank’s adventures like he never left. Ennis, Jacen Burrows, Guillermo Ortego, Nolan Woodard, and Rob Steen deliver a brutal and bloody beginning as Frank chases down someone who everyone seems to think is him.

| Published by Marvel / MAX

Reaver #5 is a fairly impressive spotlight for Breaker as he does what he really didn’t want to do again in order to help his “friends”. Justin Jordan, Rebekah Isaacs, Alex Guimarães, and Clayton Cowles present a number of twists and surprises in one of the most brutal issues yet.

| Published by Image / Skybound

Ronin Island #8 sees the remaining islanders largely stand together as they try to both stand up to and flee from the Shogun’s soldiers and madness. With a terrible occurrence that looks like it’s going to cause even more problems for the survivors. Giannis Milonogiannis and Irma Kniivila’s art continues to be everything.

| Published by BOOM! Studios

Sea of Stars #5 very nicely puts the pieces together as a disconsolate Gil has been captured and basically given up thinking Kadyn dead is brought to the world where his son is about to be gutted. Jason Aaron, Dennis Hallum, Stephen Green, Rico Renzi, and Jared K. Fletcher are telling an incredible story here and this issue throws even more twists at the reader.

| Published by Image

Seven Days #2 unfolds some of the fallout of people learning that they only have seven days left, as the superhero community is enlisted to try to stop whatever the shiny harbinger things are. Gail Simone, José Luís, Jonas Trinidade, Michelle Madsen, and Saida Temofonte are continuing to build an intriguing story here as we get more and more of the breadth of the Catalyst Prime universe.

| Published by Lion Forge / Catalyst Prime

Superman #17 is kind of a housekeeping issue from Brian Michael Bendis, Kevin Maguire, Paul Mounts, and Dave Sharpe, acting as a prologue to “The Truth”. A bit of reflection on the Unity Saga, Event Leviathan, and Year of the Villain.

| Published by DC Comics

Tales from the Dark Multiverse: Blackest Night #1 might well be the best of these one-shots yet. Tim Seeley, Kyle Hotz, Dexter Vines, Walden Wong, Danny Miki, David Baron, Allen Passalaqua, and Tom Napolitano give us a bleak look at a world where Sinestro chose not to share the power of the White Lantern light and essentially everything fell to Nekron and the Black Lanterns. It’s a very unique take on the zombie apocalypse on its own, made more interesting as a fallen Sinestro, Lobo, and Dove try to save this universe. The art from Hotz, Vines, Wong, Miki, Baron, and Passalaqua is perfect.

| Published by DC Comics

Trees: Three Fates #3 continues to build up the weird atmosphere from last issue, then turns around and focuses on more of the gritty aspects of Oleg, Mik, and Nina. Gorgeous artwork all throughout from Jason Howard and Dee Cunniffe.

| Published by Image

Triage #3 shifts to Commander Marco’s reality as the group flee from the Hunter. I really like what Phillip Sevy and Frank Cvetkovic have been doing with this story. Great high concept, but the interpersonal relationships are where it’s really at.

| Published by Dark Horse

Usagi Yojimbo #6 is a beautiful updating and embellishment of the very first story of Usagi from Albedo by Stan Sakai and Tom Luth. This single issue story really captures the spirit and magic of all of Sakai’s stories, wonderfully portraying his mix of action and folklore.

| Published by IDW

Vampirella/Red Sonja #3 explores more of what the Russians were doing in regards to Drakulon and more. More very nice humour from Jordie Bellaire in the interactions between Vampirella and Sonja.

| Published by Dynamite

Wonder Woman #82 begins “The Wild Hunt” from the new creative team of Steve Orlando, Kieran McKeown, Scott Hanna, Romulo Fajardo Jr., and Pat Brosseau. It very much continues on from the plot threads and elements of the previous run, continuing to build on the current conflict between Wonder Woman and Cheetah.

| Published by DC Comics

X-Men #2 is pretty damn great, going back to the big and wild ideas bringing new elements into the X-universe, all while Cyclops gives some of the strangest parenting. Jonathan Hickman, Leinil Francis Yu, Garry Alanguilan, Sunny Gho, and Clayton Cowles give us a new mystery with the arrival of Arakko and the first of -|A|-’s missing original horsemen.

| Published by Marvel

Other Highlights: Age of Conan: Valeria #4, Agents of Atlas #4, Catwoman #17, Doctor Who: The Thirteenth Doctor Holiday Special #1, The Dollhouse Family #1, Elvira: Mistress of the Dark #10, Firefly: The Sting, Future Foundation #4, Ghosted in LA #5, GI Joe: A Real American Hero #268, Girl on Film, Go Go Power Rangers #25, Harley Quinn & Poison Ivy #3, History of the Marvel Universe #5, Marvel Action: Spider-Man #11, Midnight Vista #3, Moonshine #13, Runaways #27, RWBY (print) #2, RWBY (digital) #6, Savage Sword of Conan #11, Star Wars #74, Star Wars: Jedi - Fallen Order: Dark Temple #4, Star Wars: Target Vader #5, The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl #50

Recommended Collections: Babyteeth - Volume 3, Dark Red - Volume 1, Fallen World, GLOW - Volume 1: Versus the Star Primas, Justice League - Volume 4: The Sixth Dimension, Savage Avengers - Volume 1: City of Sickles, Star Wars: Age of Resistance - Heroes, Star Wars Adventures - Volume 7: Pomp and Circumstance, Wonder Twins - Volume 1: Activate

d. emerson eddy can hear the scratching at the walls of reality.

[acdhw]

Poirot vs Holmes: Cases of Derivation

I’ve finished watching the entire series of Poirot and now am onto some short stories and novels. While Arthur Conan Doyle admitted that Holmes was inspired by Edgar Allan Poe’s Dupin, Poirot, in his turn, is heavily influenced by Holmes, especially in early works. Let’s have a closer view, taking as examples three short stories.

Part 1: The Veiled Lady (1925)

First of all, short stories are written from Hasting’s POV which is a direct reference to Watson and Dupin’s nameless companion. At the beginning of this story Poirot is getting restless without a case, just like Holmes does. But unlike Holmes, who laments the lack of ingenuity in criminals, Poirot is so self-important that he seriously assumes that criminals are too afraid of him to commit any crimes.

Then the events unfold roughly in the same way as in The Adventure of Charles Augustus Milverton (1904): no sooner than Poirot says, “To work against the law, it would be pleasing, for a change”, a pretty lady of high society comes to him seeking his help against a blackmailer. She is engaged to a duke, there’s her compromising letter, and she doesn’t have sufficient means to buy it back. So she asks Poirot to negotiate. The blackmailer shows up to Poirot’s flat, but the negotiations prove to be futile. Pretty much a carbon copy, isn’t it?

Poirot decides to burgle the house of the blackmailer with the help of Hastings. Here the plagiarism borrowing becomes awkward because for a man who prefers to solve cases avoiding leg work it’s rather out character. As they proceed with their plan at night, we learn that Poirot visited the blackmailer’s house earlier under a false identity to ensure an easy access later. No, he didn’t get engaged to a maid but fooled the housekeeper. Points to Holmes for using his charm. Points to Poirot for not breaking a girl’s heart. I guess he didn’t have the looks?

The burglary is far less dramatic: there’s no hand holding behind the curtains, no chases through the garden and narrow escapes, no witnessing of the blackmailer being murdered by his former victim. Nope. Poirot just finds what he was looking for. The blackmailer is killed offstage somewhere in Holland. The lady and the bloke who pretended to be the blackmailer when he talked to Poirot are actually two crooks who had robbed a jewellery shop and had been in league with the real blackmailer until he decided not to share with them and hid the jewels in his house.

Having read this story, I remain as perplexed as I was after watching the episode of the TV series. This goes beyond being simply inspired. It’s a rip-off, and a bland one at that. The action, the tension, the excitement of CHAS are gone. It’s not as if Mrs. Christie couldn’t come up with original plots of her own—she could and did most successfully. If it’s a “form of flattery”, as E. W. Hornung put it in his dedication to ACD in The Amateur Cracksman, it’s a rather unsatisfying form.

[ohmababypoe]

Between The Lips

Word Total:893

 Request: anonymous asked: Hello, I was wondering if you could make a one shot with Poe where he annoys the reader. Like teasing, cocky, and insufferable Poe. I know you've done it before but they are my favorite Poe stories.

 Pairing:  Reader x Poe Dameron

 It was a lovely day, a calm melody resounded in unison making a melodic and calm atmosphere on the small repair shop. Y/N hummed happily as she moved around the small shop, even the smell of oil and the fuel of the X-Wings didn’t dither her happiness. Clearly, destiny had another idea of how the day was going to be different for her.

 “Bonita (beautiful),” Y/N stopped in her tracks and clearly tensed at the sound of the male voice. “Did you repair it? Unlike you, some people have important stuff to do around here” Poe asked as he entered the small metallic structure, he frown when he saw it—

 “For the tenth time,” Y/N turned around and pinched her nose trying to come up with a way to tell Poe that she was not going to fix the bent antenna of BB-8; Y/N was a mechanical engineer and not a mechatronic engineer.  She didn’t how Poe could be the best pilot of the galaxy. “My name is not bo— whatever you’re calling me and lastly I am a ME-CHA-NI-CAL engineer, I can’t fix it,” she said with a very tranquil voice but her face said otherwise, her eye twitched and the veins on her neck and forehead very visibly pulsating against her sweaty and red skin.

 Poe smirked on how Y/N looked at him, this was the only time he had her attention on him. Other times she was busy under the X-Wings, sometimes she was laughing with other mechanics but she never looked at his way just like any other person on the base. For her, she was a simply stupid man with an ugly brown leather jacket. “I thought you were the best engineer on the base,” he said with a smirk crossing his arms across his chest. “Preciosa (precious) —” a metallic thing fell in front of him; it was an X-screwdriver rolling to touch the front of his black boots.

 “I said, stop calling me names; my name is Y/N” Y/N narrowed her eyes and Poe simply shrugged and leaned his back against the metallic work table beside him. “You can go leave your damn comments in the suggestion box” she growled and walk towards the small motor set in a circular, wooden table.

 “Te ves tan bonita cuando te enojas, (You look so beautiful when you’re mad)” Poe said with a small smirk on his face and waited for Y/N to turn around and lash out at him. Y/N bit her lip, of course, she knew a little bit of Spanish. Working on the universe gave you a lot of linguistic skills, did she just— she shook her head and tightened her grip on the ratchet wrench and bit her tongue. Two could play this game, a small smile settled on her face and she continued to walk towards her destination.

 “Go away, Poe”

 Poe rubbed his face, why it was so difficult to have a decent conversation with her. Before all of this, they were best friends; what happened? She suddenly stopped talking to him after he told her about his missing leather jacket, Poe let Finn keep it. “Finn looks good in my leather jacket, doesn’t he?” Y/N’s eyes perked, what game was Poe playing now? The I-am-going-to-get-you-jealous no those foolish games didn’t work on her. So Y/N continued to ignore him as she worked on the small motor.

 “I’ll help you”

 Y/N almost let the wrench out of her grasp, Poe was kneeling behind her. His hot breath was just on her right ear, her heart started to beat faster against her chest and her breath quicken. She was trying to loosen a damn tight bolt, her strength had failed her. “Let me” his calloused hand brushed her hands as he took the wrench out of her grasp. “Here”

 “Red suits you”

 Y/N rolled her eyes and stood up facing Poe, “What are you doing? Poe, stop—”

 “Me gustas (I like you)” Poe blurted out in Spanish, Y/N’s ears turned pink and her mouth was agape. Did he just confess to her? But about Finn, that look that Poe gave him. He had seen all the exchange on the open-hangar, how they ran towards each other arm and when Poe bit his lip looking at the ex-Stormpilot was a give away.

 “But I thought—”

 Poe looked at her and took in her distress appearance; Y/N seemed to be in very deep thought between her lips her tongue darted out. Her fingers tapped her thigh. “You, you know Spanish”

 “Of course, I do; Poe I am the best engineer in the galaxy” Y/N looked up and mixed when Poe’s face got red as the small symbol of the Resistance of the lateral side of the X-Wing. “También me gustas (I like you too)” She smiled shaking her hand and put a hand on his shoulder. She got on her tippy toes and placed a soft kiss on his red cheek.

 “Wait— you never told me,” Poe asked in a tremulous tone, his voice break out at the end. He cleared his throat and put a hand on her shoulder.

 “You never ask” Y/N softly replied taking his hand off her arm with a smirk on her face she went passed his she patted his shoulder and walked away.

 “God, I love you”

[lee-jinkis-ponytail]

Haunts & Hellhounds: Meet the Vendors

Maddie & Damon -- Ages Unknown -- Role: Vendors

These two come as a pair, united by their hatred for their captor, Grimm Morreaux. They know better than anyone that resistance is futile. But maybe if the right group of survivors came along, they would join in the fight...

Read on for H&H stats, current status, backstory, and fears.

SPOILER WARNING: If you have not finished the most recent chapter of Haunts & Hellhounds over on Wattpad, and you wish to avoid spoilers (including whether the character has survived thus far), DO NOT read past this break.

The most recent chapter is: Chapter 7. *New chapters every Friday at 4PM EST!* :)

Madison “Maddie,” the Mad Scientist & Damon Morreaux, Resident Witch

Haunt & Hellhound Level & Trope: LVL9 Mad Scientist & LVL9 Witch, respectively

Total EXP: 25600 each

Student Backgrounds: N/A

Alignments: Chaotic Good (both)

Defense Stat: 18 each

HP Maximum: 55 each Current HP: 55 each

SP Maximum: 40 Current SP: 33

MP: 71 Spell Attack Bonus: +8 Death Saves: -Successes: ( ) ( ) ( ) -Failures: ( ) ( ) ( ) Hit Dice: 9d10 (unarmed) or 9d12 (armed)

Proficiency Bonus: +6 (both)

Attributes (* = proficient): (1) Strength: 12 (+1) (2) Dexterity: 13 (+1) (3) Constitution: 14 (+2) (4) Knowledge*: 15 (+2) (5) Serenity*: 15 (+2) (6) Charisma: 12 (+1)

Skills (* = proficient): (1) Acrobatics (Dex)(+1) (2) Alchemy & Chemistry* (Kno)(+10) (3) Animal Handling* (Cha)(+9) (4) Arcana & Witchcraft* (Ser)(+10) (5) Athletics (Str)(+1) (6) Crafting* (Dex)(+9) (7) Deception (Cha)(+1) (8) History & Lore* (Kno)(+8) (9) Insight (Kno)(+2) (10) Intimidation & Distraction (Cha)(+1)   (11) Investigation (Kno)(+2) (12) Perception (Ser)(+2) (13) Persuasion (Cha)(+1) (14) Religion & Occultism* (Kno)(+8) (15) Sanity* (Ser)(+8) (16) Sleight of Hand (Dex)(+1) (17) Stealth (Dex)(+1) (18) Survival* (Kno)(+8) (19) Technology (Kno)(+2)

Extra Proficiences: (1) Magical Weapons: Thanks to Damon’s knowledge of all things magical, he is extremely adept at identifying the uses of all magical weapons without the need to reference ancient texts. He may use his proficiency bonus when attacking with any magical weapon. (2) The Witch & The Mad Scientist: These two characters gain an additional +2 to the Alchemy & Chemistry and the Arcana & Witchcraft skills, on top of their attribute and proficiency bonuses. (3) English: These characters both speak English. (4) Latin: These characters both speak Latin. (5) One with Nature: Damon’s knowledge of familiars and Maddie’s knowledge of herbology increase their Animal Handling and Crafting skills (+2 each, on top of their attribute and proficiency bonuses). Abilities: (1) Arcane Blast (Damon): This is a basic magical attack that sends a gust of arcane magic blasting at the enemy. Cost: 2MP (2) Field Medic (Maddie): If Maddie has the correct supplies, she can use one turn to quickly mix a healing poultice in the middle of battle. (3) Swarm (Damon): Damon can summon a swarm of rats to attack a target, dealing 5d4 damage if the attack is successful. Cost: 10MP (4) Water to Wine (Maddie): Once per battle, and if she has a potion in her inventory, Maddie can transform one type of potion into another (ex: a healing potion in a restorative mana potion). (5) Full Heal (Damon): Once per battle, Damon may heal one companion fully, even if they are unconscious. Cost: 15MP (6) Poison Resistance (Maddie): If attacked with poison damage, Maddie takes only half the damage dealt, as she has built up a tolerance to nearly every deadly poison over the years. Inventory: -Maddie: 4 coat pockets, 2 pants pockets, and a satchel (healing potion x4, mana potion x2, satchel full of various herbs); 1-handed weapon (revolver) -Damon: 4 cloak pockets, satchel (healing potion x1, mana potion x3); familiar (Poe); 1-handed weapon (basic magic staff, adds +1 to his spell attack bonus)

Appearance: -Maddie has short hair, half-shaved on one side of her head. She is always wearing safety goggles, a lab coat, and a bandana. -Damon is a stylish witch, with well-tailored clothes underneath a silky cloak. He always wears a classic witch’s hat and a cloth tied around his eyes.

Backstory & Personality: Maddie and Damon don’t really like to talk about themselves too much. Their lives have been hard, trapped in the tower by Damon’s brother, the warlock Grimm Morreaux, and all of his ghoulish guardians. What they will tell survivors are the basics: Damon is Grimm’s younger brother, and Maddie is Grimm’s ex-girlfriend. When they once tried to escape the tower themselves, Grimm made a brutal example of his own brother, violently removing Damon’s eyes and permanently blinding him. Damon and Maddie haven’t tried to escape since. Forced to be a part of Grimm’s twisted game, they’ve taken on the roles of the vendors. Maddie is in charge of “the science-y things,” as Damon calls them, while he is in charge of all things arcane. They spend most of their time up on the tower’s roof, tending the menagerie and the garden. Though their bedrooms are on the thirteenth floor along with Grimm’s, they are magically blocked from accessing his chambers, thus preventing them from overthrowing him. But this new group of survivors seems pretty hell-bent on taking Grimm down. Maddie and Damon are pretty sure it’s impossible. But if things start to look up for Laurie and the others, these NPCs might just join in the battle...

Favorite Horror Movies: -Maddie: “None. I actually kind of hate horror, thanks to Grimm.” -Damon: The VVitch - “Who WOULDN’T want to live deliciously?” Horror Movies They Will absolutely NEVER Watch Because It Is Just Too Spooky: -Maddie: “Seriously, none of them. Ever again. If I ever get out of here, it’s nothing but comedy for the rest of my life.” -Damon: The Blair Witch - “Hot take, but she is a boring ass witch.”

[beautifullights1]

stormpilot fanwork appreciation day!

Oh my. Ohhhh my goodness. I have no idea where to start and I’m sure I’ll forget a bunch of great authors, but here goes: thank you all for making my day every time you update a fic. 

Authors:

@animalasaysrauer (TuppingLiberty) my beloved RP buddy, who’s responsible for a heckton of sweet fics, most of which feature emotionally honest conversations - my personal jam.

@imaginarygolux who blesses the fandom with an astonishing amount of charming fics, including some prime h/c, delightful smut, and unique AUs.

@topographical-map-of-utah who wrote a whole bouquet of incredible fics featuring trans Poe. Also draws incredibly adorable art as @topoart, AKA the only tumblr I’ve ever signed up for notifications from, because no sir I do not want to miss a single drawing. 

@shawarma-palace (Cognomen) writes sentences that just take my breath away for a few seconds while I stare at it, hoping that if I read enough of them I’ll be able to write like that someday. Start with the glorious Endymion and I.

@la-tarasque who’s been off in real life for a while (sob!) but whose fics are still some of the most incredible whump I’ve ever read. Start with Last of the Chaos and go from there. 

@bomberqueen17‘s Home Out in the Wind series offers all of the character development, relationship growth, and worldbuilding one could ever ask for in a longfic (like, really long, wondrously long, sink-your-teeth-into-and-stay long). OT3 endgame.

Fics:

latch onto me by @beautifulglider basically killed me with laughter, which is the best way to go. 

the hand that first held mine by @deputychairman gave me a lot of Feelings, how dare. Especially about Finn and children. Don’t do this to me, please. I have enough of those already.

Sounds like a Plan by @cha-llamala​ features the most hilarious mid-firefight banter I’ve ever read. 

Later by GalacticProportions: All of GalacticProportion’s fics are graceful, well-written, and heartfelt, with vivid characters and settings. Go read them. Now. Careful, you may catch a feeling or three. 

measured by @twofrontteethstillcrooked: Finn feels. So many Finn feels. So well-written. So much goodness. Oh my. 

A Room with a View by pyes: Long one-shot with some incredible worldbuilding, character development, and holy moly hot smut. 

Memories Lost by @linatrinch: Slayed me. Completely. I can’t wait for the Finn POV companion fic, no pressure or anything ;)

Jessika Pava: Best Wingman in the Resistance! by ScarlettStorm: HILARIOUS. Like, oh my god, falling out of my desk chair and rolling around on the floor clutching my ribs because OH MY GOD THIS FIC. Just wait till the boot, ok?

[morethanonepage]

5, 17?

5. What’s a crackship you love?

answered here!

tho @youandthemountains has pointed out that i ship poe/c’ai threnalli and snap/space!mohinder BUT i would argue poe/c’ai is NOT a crackship, as they sit right next to other in TLJ, no inches apart bc they are gay, and Poe runs right into his arms and gets a big bear hug from him, ergo, they are canonically dating imo, or at least were in TLJ.

snap/space!mohinder is -- ok maybe but also it’s really just space!matt parkman and space!mohinder and they lived together & raised a child so like. nothing cracky about that either. 💅🏽

17. Describe a fic that is still in the ‘ideas’ stage.

atm EVERYTHING feels like it’s in the ideas stage bc i do no writing lately but i did have an idea for a john/chas fic yesterday and started getting some dialogue down, and then gave up on it bc that’s where i’m out right now. BUT  basically it was a birthday fic set in the Mucous Membranes days where chas finds out it’s john’s birthday and is like 'hey do you want to do something to celebrate’ but john has all his related birthday hangups so he’s like pffft, NO. but then at the end of the night he shows up at chas’ room to be like ok WELL, not that i CARE, but what exactly did you have planned, in terms of birthday celebrating? and w/e it’s awks but sweet, which is. all i really want to read/write atm.

i also keep vaguely planning for the sequel to my notting hill fic, which i know think i’d want to set during ~the pandemic bc i like the idea of two people in a new relationship getting thrown into this very intense situation but also getting to spend a lot of time together (esp for this AU, bc it’s going from NOT spending very much time together to spending ALL the time together). So i’m still. Noodling with that in my brain.

[sourlander]

20 Questions Tag

Rules: answer 20 questions and tag 20 followers who you’d like to get to know better

I was tagged by: @cha-llamala

Name: Christina

Nickname: Most people in RL call me Chrissy. I’ve had that nickname ever since I was a day old. My cousin’s husband walked into the hospital room and said: “Hi, Chrissi” (back then it was written with an “I” ;-P) and that’s how it started. I have various nicknames on the internet, but nowadays I mostly use Sourlander, and the people on the SWWA call me Sour, which is really sweet (haha).

Zodiac: Cancer

Height: Short-average

Orientation: hetero

Nationality: German

Favorite Fruit: cherry

Favorite Season: summer

Favorite Flower: rose mallow

Favorite Scent: freshly baked cake...

Favorite Color: light pink

Favorite Animal: dog! No questions asked. Dogs always get me ;)

Coffee, Tea, or Hot Chocolate: I’m a total tea person. Yes, I drink coffee occasionally but it’s not as appealing as a nice cup of Twinings Lady Grey or Wurzelsepp’s “Rose-Marzipan” tea. I also never say no to a mug of hot chocolate.

Average Hours of Sleep: Totally depends.... 7? I wake up at around 6 most days usually, though. 8 at the latest and that rarely ever happens.

Favorite Fictional Character: That’s a toughie... there are so many characters I love... Enjolras from LesMiz is such a wonderfully determined guy, but I also love Eponine... or Jo from Little Women, or Hermione, Fred and George Weasley, Snape, or Sam Gamgee, Julian of Waringham, Poe Dameron, Finn, Ben Solo, Luke Skywalker... so many great and complex characters, but I guess my favourite is Katniss Everdeen. She learned so much and remained true to herself through all of it. I love how complex she is and how stubborn. She’s magnificent and I love her with all my heart, though I sure as hell could never be friends with her... I think..

Number of Blankets you Sleep With: usually just the one. When it gets cold, I get out an extra one, but my dog sleeps under the blanket with me, so I rarely get cold ;)

Dream Trip: Uhm... I’m going to Brazil in a couple of weeks to visit my friend... so that’s pretty damn dreamy ;) I’ve always wanted to go to Scotland, too, though that’s not as far away from here and not as hard to get to ;)


Blog Created: Uhm... ages ago....

Tags: Nope... 20 people is a bit much, I suppose... but I’m gonna tag @auroralynne @panda-capuccino @beautifullights1 @telekinetic-hedgehog @flausengut @maeglinthebold and everyone else who wants to join in!