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#it's branding leave me alone
duckapus · 5 months
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AU where Meggy gets turned into a vampire and Mario gets turned into a werewolf
They were bit in completely separate incidents and are keeping it secret from everyone, including each other and the rest of the Crew.
Luigi's the only one who knows that Mario is a werewolf because he was there the night Mario got bit (well, nearly mauled to death is more accurate).
Meggy initially doesn't have anyone who knows about her being a vampire, at least until Whimpu happens to stumble across her while she's feeding.
Mario can shift voluntarily into either a very-big-but-seemingly-normal wolf form, himself with wolf features, or a big scary wolf-man form, but it takes him a while to properly figure out how both because he and Luigi have to figure it out with no help and because he's an idiot.
He's also got an uncontrollable fuckoff-Massive wolf form with a mind of its own that he turns into when there's a full moon.
He's got some wolf mannerisms now, obviously
While Meggy does have the classic vampire weaknesses, they're thankfully the manageable versions (so the sun does hurt her but sunscreen deals with it, mirrors and cameras only don't work if they have silver, needs to drink blood but can still eat normal food no problem (unless it as garlic obviously), etc.) since for plot reasons I need her to actually be able to keep it a secret.
She can shapeshift into a variety of animals, not just bats, and one form in particular makes all the shit she has to deal with now almost worth it: Vampire Squids are a thing that exists, which wouldn't matter for most vampires with how situational it would be (due to vampire squids specifically being deep sea squids) but in her case it means she gets to have her Swim Form again (though modified a bit since vampire squids have webbed tentacles with tooth-like spikes on the underside)
Also I know that vampire squids are actually octopi but let me have this
The vampire and werewolf that turned them are still at-large and causing trouble in the Mushroom Kingdom (including making more vampires and werewolves, many of which are less inclined than Meggy and Mario to not follow their new darker impulses), bringing all manner of monster hunters out of the woodwork to deal with the problem (some, like the Belmont Clan, are more competent and altruistic than others, like the Guards (because of course those two would want to get involved in the latest violent trend)), which is a large part of why the two of them are keeping themselves a secret
Another big part is of course the fact that Anti-Shroomy Exists
It also turns out that Bob was a big-name monster hunter a few hundred years ago, and shockingly he's easily the most competent of all the hunters in town, so the Bros, Meggy and Whimpu are understandably extremely wary of him right now
and as if the situation wasn't bad enough, Demon Peach has somehow managed to crawl her way out of the Creep Pit and is prowling the Kingdom (surprisingly stealthily for something of her size and disposition, I might add)
more details and (hopefully) some pictures to come in later posts
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hyacinthsdiamonds · 2 months
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I'm sorry but the irony of Nico calling Max unprofessional is sending me so bad like sir there's an entire garage full of people, who were literally in the trenches trying to survive the Brocedes fallout while just doing their jobs, who might have a few things to say about your (& Lewis') level of professionalism at that time 😭✋️
#f1#formula 1#formula one#max verstappen#nico rosberg#lewis hamilton#brocedes#like niki lauda had to try multiple times to literally parent trap them to try and get them on speaking terms it never worked#because one would arrive they'd see the other and the other would leave#& if i remember correctly the garage crew would swap around from race to race as a like see we aren't favouring anybody gesture 😭#and thats no shade to nico because it was both of them contributing to that environment#his comment re max is just making me laugh#like if i was a part of the pr/media team - which is a part of the degree I'm working on irl - at merc that year i would've lost the plot#like its insane reflecting on it nearly a decade later but the poor souls just trying to do their job in the eye of that storm#truly gods strongest soldiers#ngl the professional comment irks me a bit because its not like max is engaging in inappropriate work place behaviour#he's engaging in another aspect of racing that his involvement raises awareness of & that makes racing more accessible#& we all know how inaccessible not only getting into racing is but also to continue to pursue the further along you go#theres so many stories of 1 sibling giving up racing so the other can keep going because the family can't afford for them both to race#its a huge financial strain & we only see a handful of drivers talk about that & try to do something to change it#and nicos fellow sky sports commentators are routinely unprofessional on so many levels#additionally max had a lot of valid reasons to be annoyed at his team today#but alas he's not english so he's ungrateful#i hate that drivers can't criticise their teams or car without immediately being branded as bratty & ungrateful#ESPECIALLY WHEN THEIR JOB IS TO GIVE FEEDBACK#you can see the double standards from sky when say Lando or George have complaints with their team/car v the likes of Max and Yuki#especially Yuki my god the things i would do to get the British media to leave him alone#this was a jokey post at one point and then became a rant whoops lmao#I'll leave it that before i write an actual essay here 😭✋️
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Bro I just want to create works of art and entertain people, I don’t want to be a vehicle of selling products, is that too much to ask???
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zarla-s · 1 year
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Couch hogs!
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[patreon]
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proudsnackeezowner · 4 months
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Let's play dip and pip pride bingo!!
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Ft my shit handwriting
Ideas also from :
@serendipnpipity @saturnlester @thighguys @emojackolantern
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voltstone · 5 months
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clementine.
what the fuck.
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doNT MAKE THAT FACE AFTER YOU SAY THAT. GIRL.
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aboyisagunasterisk · 4 months
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wasnt gonna drink again tonight but lowk missing septum hayley like a mf 🕊️🕊️
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mooshys · 2 months
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the diva in question is oikawa
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pemberlaey · 9 months
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i bring a sort of “mr rochester should have died in the fire” energy to any critical discussion of jane eyre
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bulbabutt · 1 year
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no offence (full offence) but if you genuinely rank tmnt 2014 above the next mutation you have bad taste and hate women and have no joy in your heart
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oasisofgalaxies · 10 months
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Repeated sounds of a metal bat hitting a wall
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georgieluz · 1 year
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wanna see webby, my little shark pin who lives on my work lanyard and is my favourite?
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enemylasagnaaaaa · 3 months
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bro
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i hate art block
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nordicbananas · 8 months
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shudder i keep on hearing the sound of these guys saying my name send help
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doodlboy · 10 months
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Every year
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josecariohca · 5 months
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.
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